#i love you miranda sex garden

[hyenagurl]

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[thisgirlnamedblusy]

Heyyy 😗 okay so g!p Donna smut idea where its reader and Donna’s first time sleeping together. Reader isn’t inexperienced but has never had a partner with a penis, and she has a fear of pregnancy but donna doesn’t like the way condoms feel so they come to a compromise of donna pulling out. So donna does that and instead cums all over readers body and donna is really into seeing her cum all over Reader 😋 (Basically just donna realizing she has a cum kink)

Yessss!!!! Thank you for your request!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :)))))

Unexpected desires

Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem!! Reader

Warnings: G!P Donna, smut, Minors DNI,fluff...

Word count: 7,847

Summary: You wanted to do it, but you were afraid....

N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!!I love you all!!!

The way home had been different for a long time, longer.

The forest embraced you with its shadowy branches and the ruins of what was once a garden full of life became your new sights as you walked slowly. You didn't mind walking through those dark places, that wooden bridge that seemed unstable. The way home was the way home, it didn't matter which one it was.

You were never a particularly brave girl, one of those villagers who perhaps dared to abandon the tedious life that was already written for you. You were always conformist, happy with the life you had been given. The village was sinister, the Black Gods, Mother Miranda, the Lords... They didn't matter to you.

You thought that maybe that way of thinking was something like a rarity, a feeling that mixed with boredom to hide it completely, so as not to have any desire for freedom.

 Live quietly in a village or suffer the consequences of trying to escape from the Gods? You had the answer very clear for a long time.

You were never interested in men. Your expectations weren’t like those of your friends. Maybe that's why deep down you always considered yourself different. But even your short relationships with girls began to be monotonous, boring. None of them managed to fill that void.

Yes, they were pretty, they gave you love, sex... But there was nothing else. The feeling of wanting to stay with one of them in a more or less stable relationship was nonexistent. You, a lover of routine, of tranquility, began to be overwhelmed by them.

It didn't matter how much you tried to convince your feelings to make up their minds, to convince yourself to fall in love with one of the girls. It never happened. Those girls were fleeting loves that never returned.

None of those girls seemed to have any kind of feelings for you, just like you did with them. The difference was your decision to remain true to yourself. You couldn't say how many of those girls threw away what they said they were to end up in a boring and empty marriage.

You had just turned 20 and you couldn't help but feel like you were in an endless spiral of tedious routine. That tranquility became a nightmare, a sentence that told you over and over again that you would never get out of it.

You wouldn't have a great love, you wouldn't have a faithful woman at your side who loved you, who you wanted to love. At least that was what you believed.

You didn't have to pray for a miracle the day that, after a sermon by Mother Miranda, a lapse made you go back into the chapel, coinciding closely with the Four Lords.

Your head was lowered but you couldn't help but rise it when you saw a figure that was too close to you; a black figure covered by a veil, looking at you curiously. It could be a ghost, a shadow, but it wasn't. That figure had a name: Donna Beneviento.

The adrenaline that your body produced was reason enough to want to have more distractions, to get a little closer to that mysterious woman.

Her mind was sick, disturbed, but her hoarse voice was soft, her hands seemed delicate, skillful. You could say that with the passage of time that woman constantly appeared in your head, but that would be a lie. From that first day, she never left it.

The surprising thing was the sudden interest that the lady in black showed in you. You didn't know why, you even thought that she saw in you a weak and perfect victim for her macabre games. But none of that happened, she didn't play with you, she invited you to tea, she slowly discovered things about you, and you about her.

For the first time in 20 years, you had achieved something you didn't think possible, you had fallen in love.

Her beauty went far beyond that of any stupid village girl. The scar on her face was just a small detail that made her even more special. She was ashamed of it, but you weren't, you never would be. Donna was perfect, simply perfect. Being in love with her was the best decision your heart made. Your life would never be routine again, never again.

Your relationship with Donna progressed little by little although you really didn't have many options. Her years in complete solitude had worsened the evil she was born with turning her into an extremely possessive woman.

Jealousy, arguments… The phases you were going through passed quickly. Your smile was a balm for Donna. Your loving eyes were a reminder that you would never abandon her. Little by little the lady in black relaxed her attitude, especially when after weeks of pleading, you agreed to abandon your life completely, to move to her old estate.

The best decision of your life.

“Donna?” you asked when you entered the mansion after spending time with your friends. A precious time that cost you a lot to get Donna to accept.

“Tesoro…” she whispered, with the hoarse voice that made you fall in love, walking towards you quickly and grabbing your waist, kissing you, claiming you with the irrational ferocity of her lips. “You're back…”

“Yes,” you said, with your eyes in love, dazzled by her relieved, calm smile, by her soft caresses on your back.

“Mm,” she murmured, fixing your hair, which always used to cover your face. “(Y/N), don't put your hair in your face… It doesn't let me see how beautiful you are.”

“Donna…” you sighed, blushing at her eternal compliments.

“Leave my hair alone,” you joked, taking her wrists to play with her hands, to intertwine your fingers erratically.

“I still can't get used to see you walking out the door,” the lady whispered, with a slightly sadder tone, kissing you slowly, hugging you to feel you again, to feel you had returned.

“I've only been gone for an hour,” you said, with your cheeks becoming more and more blushed. Her voice, her gaze… She was perfect

Her grip tightened, holding your hands, surely imagining a horrible scenario in which you never came back. Fortunately, you had long since managed to overcome those little crises.

“Shh, eh, Donna, calm down, my love,” you said softly, placing a hand on her wounded cheek, forcing the trembling lady to look at you. “I'm here, I always come back, you know that.”

“C-certo,” she said, blinking hard and smiling again. “Y-you'll always come back.”

“Of course,” you said enthusiastically, finishing to scare away her demons with a tender kiss, one that elicited a sweet laugh from the lady in black. “Come, let's sit down, it's not dinner time yet.”

Donna nodded and let herself be dragged by your hand into the quiet living room, sitting with you on your favorite couch.

“How are your friends?” she asked after a few moments of romantic staring. No matter how much time had passed, she would always look at you like that. You were completely crazy about her.

“Donna? Where's Donna?” you asked jokingly, looking around with a frown. “How long have you been interested in my friends?”

“I'm not interested,” the lady said in a soft voice, turning on the couch, resting the head on her hand. “I feel like hearing your voice.”

“Um, that doesn't sound like you,” you joked, turning around as well and putting your legs up on the couch. “Surely what you want is to make sure I haven't been out there making out with girls, huh?”

“(Y/N), don't say things like that,” she protested, with a dark look, gritting her teeth. “It makes me sick…”

“Okay, okay, I'm sorry, Donna,” you apologized in time, taking one of her hands and kissing the back of it romantically. “Anyway, I haven't spent much time with Irina.”

“Who is that?” she asked, pretending that jealousy wasn't speaking for her.

“The daughter of… Oh, come on, you don't have to worry about her, besides, she's pregnant.”

Donna nodded slowly, breathing deeply. Luckily that was a fact that relieved the lady in black, relaxing her expression. You remained thoughtful, since you had just found out that shocking news.

“Can you believe it?” you asked amused, shaking your head.

“Yes, I believe it, why wouldn't I?” Donna said confused, completely oblivious to your usual irony and sarcasm.

It might seem terrible that Lady Beneviento didn't have those communication skills. It was like a reminder of her former loneliness. You, however, found that innocence adorable in a not-so-innocent woman.

“She says it was a mistake, apparently her boyfriend wasn't careful,” you sighed, shaking your head again, pitying your friend. “Poor thing…”

“Poor thing? Why?” the curious lady asked.

You opened your mouth to say something but you didn't, frowning and scratching the back of your neck.

“A child is too much responsibility,” you commented, looking away. “Irina is still very young.”

“How old is she?” the brunette wanted to know.

“Oh, well, she's two months older than me,” you said. “Don't you think she's too young?”

The lady in black shrugged, blinking in confusion and shaking her head.

“No,” she said dryly, not seeming moved or surprised by the information.

That disinterested and very different attitude gave you an involuntary shiver.

“Oh, um… Well…” you stammered, arching your eyebrows. “I… I really think she’s too young…”

“Mm,” she murmured, with an impassive, almost expressionless look. “A child is a gift from the Gods, (Y/N). I’m convinced that your friend and that boy will be very happy.”

“You think so? The guy is a coward and he has abandoned her,” you commented, frowning at that uncomfortable conversation for you. “Sometimes I think that men only think with their…” you stopped before continuing, lowering your gaze. “Um, forget it. I didn’t want to offend you.”

“You don't offend me, I'm not a man,” Donna said, with that same expressionless look, serious but relaxed.

“Oh, that's obvious but... But you have... A penis, you know...” you murmured blushing. Your comment didn't offend the lady in black, who smiled tenderly, lifting your chin.

“I'm not like that, tesoro, I would never abandon you,” she whispered in a soft voice, with a hand on your cheek.

It might seem that this comment was sweet, even romantic, but for you it was a bit disturbing, it unleashed a different, strange fear inside of you.

“Oh, it's good to know, I guess, I...” you said stuttering, joining your hand with hers. “Don't listen to me, Donna. I'm just surprised by the news, that's all.”

“I love it when you get nervous,” the doll maker whispered adorably, getting a little closer to you to capture your trembling lips in a soft, intense kiss. “You're so sweet…”

You laughed shyly again, unable to resist her charms, biting your lip at the caresses of hers on your skin.

“Hey, let me go…” you said amused, trying unsuccessfully to escape from her kisses, from her increasingly intense caresses. “Donna.”

“Mm, no, I don't want to let you go… Come here, tesoro,” she whispered seductively, pulling your hand so you leaned on her body, climbing on top of her while she kissed you tirelessly.

Your laughter was camouflaged with the sound of the kisses, with the increasingly agitated breathing that came out of your lungs. Your mind began to cloud and the internal desire of your body hid that uncomfortable conversation, causing your hips to begin to move and your hands to run over the face of the lady in black.

“Bellisima…” Donna whispered in your ear as her fingers caressed your dress, while her kisses continued their path along the skin of your face, down your neck.

Of course there was nothing wrong with letting yourself be carried away by that growing passion. You liked to kiss her, to caress her, to let your bodies dance together, to have your ears blessed with her ardent whispers, even if you didn't understand them.

You pulled away for a moment, placing your legs on either side of her hips, erratically running your hands over her chest as you thought about how this outburst of kisses and hugs could end.

“I love you, you know that, right?” you said in a soft voice, not looking into her bright eye, carelessly playing with one of the buttons on the top of her dress.

Donna smiled as she caressed one of your legs, slowly returning to your lips, kissing them as her grip tightened more and brought you closer.

“Not as much as I love you…” she whispered playfully, slipping her mischievous hand under your dress, taking advantage of the distraction of her soft words to get further.

At first, that feeling comforted you, her nails running over your skin without hurting you, her kisses moistening your lips, her hips moving slowly to make contact with yours. It seemed like the perfect moment, the moment that you constantly delayed, the one you thought you weren't ready for.

Letting yourself go was much easier than on other occasions, but your mind was restless, working without you wanting it to, remembering that conversation with your friend, making passion slowly turn into irrational nerves.

“Uh, em…” you said nervously when her body began to react to your passion, when you noticed her erection pressing against you. “Wow…” you said playfully, moving away slowly so as not to make contact with her throbbing desire. “Donna…”

“What's wrong, tesoro?” she asked, breathing heavily, looking at you confused. “Come, come back here…”

“What’s in there?” you asked nervously, getting off her body and pointing at her lap.

The lady in black lowered her gaze and returned it to yours again, with a shy expression.

“Oh, um, well, I…” she said embarrassed. “I was really enjoying it…”

“Yes, I can see that,” you said nervously, looking away from her lap. “You, you are very sensitive Donna.”

“Yes, no, well, I… I thought that…” the lady stammered, visibly confused by your attitude. “Have I made you uncomfortable?”

“No, no, not exactly,” you said, making a gesture with your hands, trying to explain what still had no logical explanation. “It's just that…”

“I want you, (Y/N), I want to make love to you,” she said, letting herself be carried away by the excitement, bringing her hands to your face to assault your lips again.

“Yes, that's obvious,” you said, moving her careless kisses away from your lips, putting a hand on her chest and glancing sideways at her lap, at that lump you touched. “Pretty obvious…”

“Come, come, please…” Donna whispered, pulling you again, fearing one of your rejections. “Don't leave me like this…”

“Oh, wait, wait, I…” you interrupted, straightening your clothes that had been messed up by that passionate outburst, one that never came to fruition.

“It's just that… It’s, it's been a very…”you murmured, trying not to look at her bright, pleading eye, playing with the hand that was pulling yours. “Hard day…” you finished, looking again at her obvious excitement deforming her black dress.

“Oh, okay,” Donna said with a slightly sad voice, leaving you alone and sitting up straight again, looking nervously at her lap. “I'm sorry, (Y/N).”

“Don't apologize, you haven't done anything wrong,” you said with a relieved smile, putting a hand on her shoulder.

She didn't return the caress, her face relaxed, avoiding your gaze.

“My body makes you uncomfortable, doesn't it?” she whispered sadly, moving her dress so you wouldn't feel intimidated.

“Donna, it's not that,” you said quickly, with the need to divert that thought from her head.

No, that wasn't true, she didn't make you uncomfortable, you liked her body, although it was true that you always ran away.

You couldn't blame her for thinking that way, on that occasion you simply couldn't.

“So why don't you want to make love to me?” the brunette asked with a brusque, inquisitive voice, crossing her arms. “I just want to love you…”

“I know, I know, darling but… I'm just a bit tired today, I want our first time to be more special,” you said, gritting your teeth to emphasize that lie, so Donna wouldn't think she was the one to blame.

She wasn't. It was only your fault and your stupid fears’.

“Special…” the lady murmured, shaking her head, repressing a sob that broke your heart. “Cazzo…” she hissed, getting up from the couch, putting her dress back. “I'm going to make dinner.”

You, fearing that she had really been offended and seeing how your excuses sounded weaker and weaker, decided to act, grabbing her wrist so she wouldn't leave.

“Donna, don't be mad at me, please,” you said in a soft voice, approaching her.

The lady looked away, her face serious, annoyed, much more so than usual. She was probably starting to get tired of your rejections.

“I'm not mad,” she whispered in a voice that betrayed her lie, removing your grip on her wrist with a brusque gesture.

“Forgive me, I'm just tired,” you said in a pleading voice, caressing her cheek, a gesture that, luckily, she didn't reject.

“If you don't like my body, tell me,” Donna hissed, with tears in her eye. “You do nothing but reject me.”

“I'm not rejecting you,” you defended yourself, shaking your head. “I don't...”

“Bugiarda...” Donna said again, with a dangerous look. “My penis disgusts you, just say it.”

“No, hey, Donna, don't start taking things for granted, you know that's not true,” you said nervously, knowing that at least you were sincere.

“I should have guessed before, I know you, I know what you did with the girls in the village, there is only one reason why you don't want to do it with me and that is my body, come on, don’t lie to me,” she snapped, pointing at you unpleasantly, breathing hard again.

“Donna, relax, okay? You're getting nervous,” you said in a calm voice, putting your hands on her shoulders. “Look at me, come on, look at me...”

She obeyed reluctantly with a hatred in her gaze that pierced your soul again.

“Honey, please...” you whispered, calming her nerves with your caresses, with a tender smile on your lips. “I have no problem with... With you, I love you...”

The lady in black sighed, closing her eye and nodding, taking your hand and squeezing it tightly in hers.

“Sorry, tesoro… You're right, I got really nervous,” she apologized in a soft voice, pulling your waist to hug you lovingly. “I'm afraid of losing you, that's all.”

“You'll never lose me, I'll tell you whenever it's necessary,” you said with a sweet smile, relaxed for having cut that crisis in time, although you didn't know how long the calm would last. “It's just my mind, you have nothing to do with it.”

“Your mind?” she asked, frowning again. “Are you afraid of something?”

“Um, well, I…” you stammered with a somewhat shy expression, shaking your head involuntarily. “It's nothing.”

“If something worries you, you should tell me,” Donna said, brushing your hair away from your face as always, staring at you. “If you don't tell me, I won't be able to help you.”

“I'll get over it,” you said, falsely downplaying it, smiling and kissing the brunette, who still had a spark of distrust in her eye. “It's nonsense, Donna, don't pay attention to me.”

“Va bene…” she sighed, shaking her head, but capturing your lips again, deepening a different kiss, an innocent, tender one. “I'll wait until you're ready.”

“I appreciate it,” you said, hanging on her neck to continue kissing her, to feel the love that invaded you both, a love that not even your stupid paranoia could eclipse.

Donna laughed softly, caressing your cheek and moving your hands away. That smile was the end of that awkward moment, it was the sign that the danger had passed.

“I'll make you something delicious, tesoro…” she said amused, with a mischievous look. “Let me make up for my stupidity.”

“Oh, come on, you always do delicious things to me,” you said laughing, swinging your body with hers, kissing her messily. “You have nothing to make up for.”

“I like making you happy,” she whispered, kissing your hand chivalrously and slowly moving away.

You looked at her, sighing romantically. She looked back at you, but her happy and loving expression faded just before she turned around completely, something subtle, but something you noticed.

“I'm sorry, Donna…” you whispered, running a hand through your hair, regretful for your attitude, walking towards the sofa and letting yourself fall on it. “I'm stupid…”

“Yes, you are!” a shrill voice made you jump in place. Angie made her appearance, taking advantage of any moment to make fun of you. That day you were not especially in the mood to put up with the irreverent doll.

“Angie, I haven't had a good day today, why don't you be a good doll and leave me alone?” you protested, ignoring the puppet's jumping on the couch.

“Silly, silly, silly! You're a silly villager!” the doll shrieked among sinister laughs.

“Okay, thanks for reminding me every day, I'm sure it takes a lot of effort,” you mocked, looking away from Angie, who laughed with satisfaction.

“I just don't want you to forget, silly,” she insisted, making you growl.

“Seriously, leave me alone, I'm not in the mood for your insults,” you said seriously, crossing your arms, thinking about everything that had happened, about your irrational fears, those that always overcame the lust you were repressing.

“Uhhhh, the silly girl is angry…” Angie sang. “I don't know how my Donna puts up with you.”

“Ugh, do you want…? Never mind,” you hissed, shaking your head and looking at the door through which the lady disappeared.

“You've left my Donna hanging again,” the doll accused you, startling you again, making the blush travel mercilessly down your cheeks. “You're cruel. Do you know what she's going through?”

“Hey, that's private,” you complained, looking away. “What do you care?”

“I don’t care, but if my Donna gets sad and cries again because of not wanting to open your legs, I won't forgive you,” Angie said, pointing at you with her finger.

“You're a very rude doll. Don't get involved in our affairs,” you said with a dark voice. You weren't really that angry with the doll, but with yourself.

“You're the one who doesn't let my Donna get involved in your affairs,” the doll hissed, looking away indignantly. “Are you playing with her?”

“What? Of course I’m not, I love her,” you said in your defense, entering into her game without wanting to. “It's none of your business, Angie.”

“Silly, idiota,” she insulted you again. “Donna is sad because she thinks you don't love her.”

“Is she sad?” you asked upset by that statement, which the puppet confirmed by nodding slowly.

“Oh... Now you want to talk to me, huh?” she mocked, making you snort and shake your head sharply.

“Why is she sad?” you asked again, frowning.

“Isn't that obvious? She knows how you fornicated relentlessly with other girls,” Angie explained, dropping down next to you.

“How do you know?”

“Donna and I are part of the same mind, remember, stupid?” the doll mocked again.

“I've only had four relationships before Donna,” you said, unintentionally starting an awkward conversation with the doll. “And I haven't loved any of those girls as much as I love her, you can be sure.”

“Ohhh, it doesn't seem like it,” Angie said, crossing her arms. “Donna is stupid, as stupid as you, but she knows how to hide her feelings. Don't worry, silly, that's what I'm here for.”

“Oh, that's nice,” you sighed, shaking your head. “Wait, what feelings?”

“Mm, I'm not supposed to tell you anything but... Well, I like you,” the doll said, patting your back.

“Really?” you asked ironically, arching your eyebrows.

“Yes, you are a very funny silly, and you take care of my Donna…” the puppet sighed, nervous and uncomfortable saying something nice.

“I guess that's the closest thing to a compliment I'll ever hear from you so… Thanks, Angie,” you said with a genuine smile, patting her back and making her grunt and shift. “Tell me, what's wrong with her?”

“It's obvious, silly… Donna thinks you hate her body,” she explained, swinging her legs comically.

“That's a lie, I don't hate her body,” you said, lowering your voice in case the lady came back earlier than expected. “I love her just the way she is.”

“Do you think she likes having that thing hanging between her legs?” Angie asked with a nasty tone.

“Angie, don't be so… explicit,” you protested. “Besides, it doesn't seem to bother her too much.”

“Ha, that's what you think, silly,” Angie said, standing up and putting a wooden finger on your nose. “She didn't ask for it, the Black Gods changed her body involuntarily thanks to Mother Miranda's gift.”

“I already know that, she told me,” you said with a frown, impatient. “What’s the point?”

“Donna is ashamed of it in the same way as her scar, but she just got used to it,” the doll explained.

“Mm, I understand,” you whispered for her to continue.

“No, you don't understand,” Angie snapped at you. “Your constant denials are making her believe that you will never be able to truly love her, that you will never be able to accept something that wasn't her fault.”

“I've already told you that I don't care about her... Well, that I don't care,” you said annoyed by the conversation. “I've just never been with someone with... a penis, you know.”

“You said penis,” Angie laughed amused.

“Oh, please…” you sighed, rolling your eyes. “I'm going to make one thing clear to you, psycho doll,” you said with a firm voice, pointing at her. “I love Donna. She's the woman of my life. I'm crazy about her and her body doesn't matter to me at all. I, I like her body, I love it, in fact.”

“So what's your problem?” Angie asked, putting her hands on her hips.

Your own words did something in your mind, a click that led you to believe them, to consider yourself stupid for having delayed the moment you desired. An absurd fear prevented you from letting yourself go, forced you to reject her.

Her body wasn't the problem, in fact, you had showered with her several times, you had seen her naked and of course, displeasure or discomfort were not the words that came to your head when doing so, rather the opposite.

So… What was stopping you from enjoying, from making love with the woman of your life? A stupidity accentuated by the circumstances of those around you.

It wasn't the fear of pain, of feeling those new sensations, that wasn't a concern. Your greatest fear was the direct consequence of that act of lust, a consequence that you had seen in your friends and that you didn't want for yourself.

Irina was the last reason why you didn't let your body act the way you wanted. You were very young, she was very young, and she was pregnant. The idea terrified you. It's not that you didn't want to start a family with Donna, sometimes you even fantasized about it but… It wasn't the time.

You were still young, you had a lot of things to live. That absurd fear of carrying that responsibility was what dragged you again and again to refuse to join your body with hers.

But miraculously, those words you said out loud, the affirmation to Angie, and to yourself that Donna was the woman of your life, that you loved her just the way she was, unleashed a wave of thoughts that made you change your mind.

Your worries were absurd, and, unlike your unconscious friends, you had already prepared yourself for that. You had nothing to worry about. You couldn't wait another night to hear the lady sigh, to make her think that you were just playing with her, that you didn't really love her.

You had to prove it to her, give in to your desires and hers and make love for the first time, that very night.

“Where are you going, silly?” Angie asked when, after a sigh, you got up from the couch, turning to smile at the doll.

“Don't even think about going downstairs,” you threatened with a smile.

“You don't give me orders, stupid!” the doll squealed in a muffled voice on your way to the elevator.

Fully determined to make that night the most special of your life, you walked to the kitchen, where the delicious aroma of the food made you sigh pleasantly.

“Donna,” you said, catching the attention of the brunette, who looked at you briefly, smiling.

You did the same, approaching her from behind and hugging her waist, planting a soft kiss on her neck.

The response was a shy laugh along with a hand in yours. It seemed like she wasn't upset at all anymore. She wouldn't be anymore.

“Amore mio…” she sighed calmly stirring one of her delicious sauces.

“It smells great,” you said, peeking around the lady's side and smiling pleased. She laughed again, taking out the wooden spoon and offering it to you.

“Do you want to try?” she asked in a sweet voice, a gesture that you accepted, keeping your eyes on hers, as if you wanted to communicate with your gaze.

“Delicious...” you sighed, savoring that sauce.

You really didn't know how to act, how to tell her what you wanted. Words would only hinder your intentions, it was much better to go straight to action. You subtly moved away, taking her free hand and playing with her fingers.

The lady in black didn't seem to want to pay attention to your clumsy mischievous glances, so you gently brought her hand to your mouth, kissing it slowly, bringing one of her slender fingers to your mouth, sucking on it in a terribly erotic way.

Of course that caught the attention of the doll maker, who looked at you with a frown, open-mouthed by what you were doing.

“(Y/N), what...? What are you doing?” Donna asked with a trembling voice. You let her finger go and smiled, moving closer to her ear.

“Donna, I want us to make love,” you whispered, biting her earlobe.

That dormant desire woke up at that moment, warming your body surprisingly quickly, forgetting for a moment your shame and your absurd worries.

“But, but tesoro... You, you said...” she stammered with a distrustful look, caressing your cheek and studying your gestures, looking for the reason for your attitude.

“I know, but I thought better of it... I want to love you, Donna, I want you to love me,” you said with a purr, biting your lip and scrutinizing the lady's perfect body with your gaze.

“Oh, um, now?” she asked nervously, but visibly excited by your change of mind. “I-I'm cooking…”

“Well, if you don't want to…”you whispered, pouting and pulling away from her, something you couldn't do completely as her arm wrapped around your waist, dragging you towards her body.

“Wait, wait…” the lady said nervously, turning off the stove and cupping your face in her hands, kissing you passionately, sighing in relief at your sudden decision.

“Shall we go?” you said, hiding your nervousness by turning around and taking her hand, walking towards the bedroom.

The kisses were hurried, wild. You walked clumsily while you devoured her, while you let your instincts take over your actions. You had never been so excited, so fearless, it was the perfect moment.

“(Y/N)…” she said, her voice agitated and with a predatory smile, leaving no corner of your face unkissed, no exposed part of your body uncaressed. “Ti amo…”

“I love you…” you whispered, walking backwards to fall on top of the mattress, so her body climbed on top of yours accompanied by her heels falling to the floor, just like yours. “I love you, Donna, I love you…” you repeated, as a reminder that you wanted to do it, that her body on top of yours sent hundreds of burning sensations to yours.

“Amore mio,” she sighed, excited by your unleashed lust, putting her hand through the ties of your dress, undoing them with a surprising skill.

Her fingers were soft, they were conquerors which didn't want to miss a single inch of your skin, which wanted to travel what was theirs, wander aimlessly through each of your curves.

Her hands traveled to the edges of your disheveled dress while yours struggled against the buttons of hers, making them disappear hopelessly.

The cold of that room reached your more and more naked, more and more exposed skin. The rush and desire mocked your bodies, forcing them to move against each other, to dance in a erotic way that caused a satisfied smile on your face.

Her skin was soft. Every part that black fabric left was like a gift for your mischievous hands. The lady simply panted, not stopping kissing you, getting rid of her sleeves to give you that divine vision of her half-naked body.

Her hands traveled down your legs, moved them at will, moved them away so her body could make more contact with yours, so her already eager erection could rub against the heat between your legs.

You moaned at the contact, letting your lust enjoy it for the first time, your hands accidentally pulling at her hair, causing a smile to spread over your neck, mercilessly attacked by her lips.

Donna sat up to look at you, to enjoy for a moment your already naked torso under her discreet hands. Her fingers tickled the skin of your breasts, her eye roamed over your nakedness in a terribly seductive way.

“Sei bellisima…” she sighed, shaking her head, moving closer to your lips slowly, letting your hands bury her head against yours, your fingers tangling in her black hair.

“Donna,” you said amused when her teeth gently dug into your skin, when her mischievous smile crossed your hot body, making you tremble.

Your hands rested on her chest as she removed her bra, mesmerizing you again with the perfection of her shapes, her curves, that body you couldn't stop looking at.

The kisses continued after some cautious caresses, a hug of her hands on your breasts, kisses that traveled relentlessly down your torso, filling it with a wet love, an unbridled passion that Donna struggled to control.

But there was no time for doubt or slowness. Your hips moved anxiously, free of fear, while her hands grabbed the edges of your underwear, pulling it down your legs under her watchful gaze.

The brunette paused for a moment, delighting in the sight of your naked body beneath hers, caressing your cheek with a confused look, with her altered breathing, with her hips unable to avoid moving against your wetness.

“You are perfect, (Y/N), I love your body, I love everything about you…” she whispered romantically, as if wanting to prevent her own desire from consuming her.

“You are so tender…” you said, noticing the blush on your cheeks, pulling the lady's hair to kiss her, with your hands already uninhibited, caressing her soft breasts, running your hand over her back, over her belly…

Her mouth left yours to rest on your nipples, to suck them slowly, without hurting you, nothing that could compare to the carelessness of your previous lovers. Donna was different, she always was.

“I want you, tesoro… I need… I need…” she murmured in a more nervous tone, keeping her lips on your belly, lowering the remaining part of her dress along with her underwear, releasing her desire, her throbbing erection that finally came out of its prison.

You moaned seeing her like that, seeing how her body was excited by the mere touch of yours, by your kisses. Her body was perfect, everything was perfect.

Your shy hand moved down her body as she impatiently studied your movements. You brushed her chest, her skin, even scratched it as you went down, caressing her shaft superficially, making her moan.

“I like it…” you whispered satisfied, moving the embrace of your hand on her erection, gently stimulating her to continue hearing those soft and discreet moans.

“(Y/N)…” the lady moaned, letting herself be carried away by the caresses of your hand, by your playful fingers stopping at the tip, exploring the best way to make her tremble.

But that gentle masturbation didn't last long, as did the touch of her fingers on your folds in compensation for your movements.

In a delicate way, Donna pushed your hand away, kissing the back of it and then your lips, sighing and placing your legs in a comfortable position before bringing her erection to your wet entrance.

The desire was overwhelming, but that terribly pleasurable contact activated the part of your mind that you had turned off. You almost forgot, you almost let yourself go.

“Wait, honey,” you said, moving away subtly despite the incredible sensation of her erection starting to enter you. She looked at you strangely, scared by your reaction.

“Cosa c’è?” Donna asked nervously, trying unsuccessfully to enter you again, something you prevented by moving away further and reaching out to your bedside table.

“Um wait,” you said with a shy smile, opening the drawer and taking something out of it, something you gave to Lady Beneviento and that she looked at suspiciously. “Put it on first, please.”

“Cosa?” she asked again, nervously, looking at you out of the corner of her eye. “(Y/N)…”

“It's, it's a condom, Donna, put it on, come on… I want to do it…” you said nervously, helping her to open the package. The passion and desire disappeared from her gaze as you took it out, approaching her erection. “Let me help you… Let’s see…”

“Basta,” she said, grabbing your wrist tightly and pulling the condom away from her skin. “What are you doing?”

“Put it on, Donna,” you insisted. “Come on…”

“No, I’m not going to do it,” she said with a frown, shaking her head. “What’s wrong with you?”

“No, what’s wrong with you?” you asked angrily, struggling with the lady until she managed to snatch the condom from you. “Donna… Come on, don’t be like that…”

“Me? What do you want, (Y/N)? Humiliate me?” the lady protested, throwing it across the room and leaving you speechless and surprised.

“No, Donna, I don’t mean to humiliate you, it’s for protection,” you said, crossing your arms and taking another one out of the drawer. “Do you want to know why we haven’t done it until now? Because I’m afraid of… Of…”

“Of what? Of feeling my skin on yours?” she said, protesting with a haughty, childish look, sitting on the bed. “Now I know that I disgust you.”

“No, damn it…” you said, hitting the bed with your fists and approaching her.

You didn't want it to be another failure, you had to convince her, help her understand your fears.

“Donna, look at me,” you whispered in a soft voice, guiding her head so she would inevitably look at you. Her brow was still furrowed. “Donna, honey I… I'm… I'm afraid of… Of getting pregnant…”

“Mm?” she murmured, with that same dark expression. “What?”

“That, that's my only fear, Donna… I… I don't feel ready to, to be a mother, do you understand?”

“I don't want you to be a mother if you don't want to, (Y/N),” Donna whispered in a dark tone. “It's not my intention.”

“But…” you said, rolling your eyes. “You know, you know that if we don’t protect ourselves, it could happen…”

“So… That's your fear, that's why you've made me wait so long…” she said, lowering her head and nodding, biting her lip before looking at you pleadingly. “It's not because of me.”

“No, no Donna…” you said with a smile, relaxing the tense atmosphere with a kiss. “I want to do it, really.”

“Okay,” she said with a calm smile, playing with your hand. “I'm relieved to hear that.”

“I'm relieved that you take it so well…” you sighed, opening another condom. “Come on, put it on, I can't wait to have you inside of me.”

“No,” she said in a brusque tone, looking away and crossing her arms.

“Donna… Didn't you understand what I told you? Come on, stop complaining and put it on… I'm going to get cold,” you said, nervous again.

“No, I'm not going to do it,” the brunette insisted with a childish protest. “That thing is humiliating, if I wear it I won't be able to feel you as much as I'd like. No.”

“Oh…” you sighed, comically scratching your face. “Don't be stubborn. I'm not going to take the risk.”

“Well,” she said, with a cocky tone. “I'm not going to put that on me.”

“Okay, and what do you propose? I'm not going to do it without protection,” you said, putting yourself at her level of cockiness.

“Well…” Donna sighed, thoughtful, scratching her head. “I can move away.”

“What?” you asked yourself with a frown.

“I'll move away before I cum, so there won't be any risk,” she explained, with a calmer tone.

“That's not… Oh…” you said unsure, thinking about your options. You certainly wanted to feel her, to truly love her, your fears couldn't consume you again. “Will you move away? Donna, I need you to promise me.”

“I promise you,” the lady said, approaching you and taking both of your hands, kissing them affectionately. “You have my word.”

“Well… In that case…” you said, smiling calmly again, fully trusting her word. Donna had never broken a promise and besides, the desire of your body was calling you. “Come here…” you whispered, pulling her to return to kissing, to reactivate that previous passion.

Without more patience, Donna positioned herself between your legs again, erotically stimulating her erection, which had been resentful of that argument, but which soon returned to normal, slowly entering you.

“Donna!” you cried out with a moan when you felt your body deform, your wet walls being stretched uncomfortably by the intruder. “Go slower… You're big…”

“I'm sorry,” she said, controlling her own pleasure. “I love you so much, amore mio…” she whispered, leaning down to kiss you, to relax your body overwhelmed by the intruder. “You’re… Tight…”

“Mm…” you said when that discomfort disappeared from your wetness, when the pleasure of having her inside of you overcame the lack of experience. You couldn't compare that sensation to any other, even your hips began to move on their own.

“Can I move, tesoro?” she asked kindly, holding and caressing your legs, enjoying that feeling of finally being inside you, of the obscene embrace of your body. “I'll be gentle…”

You nodded, unable to control your moans, moving slowly to the rhythm of her soft thrusts, sliding with extreme ease, impregnating her with your wetness. You didn't know exactly how it would feel the way you wanted at first, but now you didn't want it that way.

“Donna, Donna…” you moaned nervously from the pleasure, moving to get all those incredible sensations. Each thrust was ambrosia. It was an electric current throughout your body, a pleasure like no other.

“You are perfect… Perfect, (Y/N)… I love taking you…” she whispered, calming your hurried moans, the unleashed lust that could be sensed due to the soft movement of your hips, ones more and more skilled, more uncontrolled.

You smiled pleased, moaning without fear, grabbing the sheets to contain your fast and anxious movements, letting yourself be cradled by hers

Kisses, hugs of your legs on her waist, caresses, soft movements… It was a passionate session that would be unforgettable. Her hands held your legs, letting her hips take the initiative, filling you with that overwhelming pleasure you didn't want it to end.

Your dormant desire was so powerful that you were starting to move erratically, to hug the brunette eagerly as your muscles tensed, letting your desired orgasm leave your lips, making you move nervously and scream in a terribly scandalous way.

Donna didn't say anything, she only moaned in satisfaction at the movements of your walls squeezing her erection. Your body relaxed little by little, but hers did precisely the opposite, speeding up, moaning erratically, almost growling.

She was also close, very close, and you closed your eyes, hoping that she would do as she promised, that this lack of control wouldn’t make her break her promise.

Luckily, with a furious growl, Donna pulled away just before she released, filling your body with her wet heat, covering you with her seed as she held you.

The labored breathing replaced the moans and the kisses returned softly to your lips. It had been something impressive, memorable. You would want to do it every night.

You both laughed without saying a word, looking at each other intensely, romantically, at least until Donna lowered her eye to your belly, to your body stained by her passion, by that wet and obscene heat.

“Donna, it was great,” you said, caressing her cheek. She nodded erratically, her gaze fixed on your body, almost without listening to you. “Donna?”

“Yes... It was...” she said, opening her eye wide, as if she were nervous, touching your skin covered with her seed, breathing heavily and moving with a strange moan.

“Are you okay?” you asked curiously, confused by her attitude, by her dark gaze that seemed not to want to move away from your body.

“Cazzo…” she hissed, looking between her legs, where unexpectedly, her erection had returned again, something that surprised you.

“Oh, darling…” you said, amused by that curious reaction of her body, which you couldn’t find an explanation for.

“You look beautiful with your body full of me…” Donna whispered, with a dark and lustful voice, as if the passion had abruptly returned. “Come.”

Without giving you time to respond, the brunette turned you over on your stomach, holding you. You played along with that curious game and when you least expected it, her shaft entered you again, wetter, but hard.

“You look… Beautiful with my cum all over your body…” Donna repeated, beginning to move roughly, not very delicately, taking you from behind with intense moans, as if something inside her had awakened.

You enjoyed that improvised repetition. You were so blinded by the pleasure that nothing worried you, only the immense desire that seemed to have no end.

The lady quickly moved her hips, increasing the rhythm of her fierce thrusts and coming out again before releasing for the second time, now wetting your back.

“Donna,” you said amused by that strange outburst, by that strange obsession with covering your body with her seed. “Stop painting my body…” you joked, making her laugh too.

“I think I'll keep doing it, tesoro… I love seeing your body like that…”

[brucewaynehater101]

Might I suggest "little soldiers" by The Cranewives for your toxic relationship playlist

Here's the OG post being referenced:

ANYWAYS. I FUCKING LOVE CRANE WIVES. I don't listen to enough of their songs though :( So I'm really happy you recommended one!!!

In the OG post, I mentioned two songs that talk about toxic relationships: "Allies or Enemies" and "Tongues and Teeth."

I didn't want to flood that list with Crane Wives, lmao. Here's some more by them that work:

"Curses"

Some fun lyrics: "Won't you stay with me, my darling, when my walls start burning down." "The devil's after both of us." "

"The Garden"

"My darling, the devil knows my name"

"The Moon Will Sing"

"I want to feel the fire that you kept from me" "I shine only with the light you gave me"

"Never Love An Anchor"

"And you'll never see the reasons I had for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you"

Songs not by The Crane Wives that may also fit the toxic classification:

"Mama's Broken Heart" by Miranda Lambert

"Under My Skin" by Jukebox The Ghost

"Dear Arkansas Daughter" by Lady Lamb

"Bobby" by Bodhi

"the fruits" by Paris Paloma

"I'm Good Luv, Enjoy." by Aaron May

"Just Take My Wallet" by Jack Stauber's Micropop

"Sex N' Drugs" by Abhi the Nomad

"I'm Yer Dad" by GRLwood

"Needs" by Verzache

"Don't Wanna Fall In Love" by KYLE

"I Love You So" by The Walters

"Breezeblocks" by alt-J

"Peach Stone" by Hobo Johnson

"Dissolve" by Absofacto

"Money" by ISAAC LEE

"Do It For Me" by Rosenfeld

"Dead To Me" by Kali Uchis

"Lovely" by ssjishmael

"Drug me, baby, seduce me and use me"

[celestial-vapidity]

'your beauty never ever scared me' tidbits (part 1/???)

Hey y'all! I was going to write more for this AU, but AO3 is apparently down rn?? So here are just some thoughts and stuff about this series instead. (There are some NSFW bits, just so y'all know).

As previously stated, Alcina is trans femme in this series. However, she's at a point in her transition where dysphoria isn't really a thing she experiences anymore?? Like, we all been knew she's confident to the point of arrogance, and even if somebody were to openly misgender her (which would probably get them killed lbr) she would be more faintly annoyed/coldly amused than anything. She would probably still retaliate ofc, that's just who she is (and she has an image to maintain).

Like I said before, Reader is AFAB but gender-neutral. So it's up to you if they're a cis woman, trans man, or AFAB enby. However, in the case of the latter two, Alcina would NOT take Reader being misgendered lying down, and would probably react much more harshly toward whoever was doing it, unless Reader was to intervene.

Also, in this series, she secretly had some difficulty learning to sign at first. Like, she has huge hands. But once she saw how happy Reader was that she was learning, she immediately doubled down, to the point where she became fluent surprisingly quickly.

Reader's cane was actually a joint effort between Donna and Karl. Donna supplied the wood from her garden, while Karl put it together and made the claw-rose charm. Alcina didn't mind asking Donna for help, but she really had to swallow her pride to ask Karl.

Alcina is actually kind of nervous about accidentally infantilizing Reader, due to their disabilities. She's good about not doing it, but that doesn't stop her from secretly being anxious that she'll slip up one day and offend them.

Reader is actually Alcina's first serious love. Like, she has had crushes and loved people non-romantically before, but this is her first time really being IN love. It takes her a bit to realize that that's what she's feeling though (and she internally panics a bit when she does), since she's never really been close to anyone outside of Miranda and the other Lords before. She's determined to do it right, though.

When she was a human, Alcina had a bad relationship with her family. They were not accepting of her transition and were the type to demonize her for being attracted to women, but still wouldn't want her to be into men either bc she's AMAB.

She eventually gets to a point where she becomes pretty domestic with Reader, something they are all too happy about.

Alcina also really wants to have kids with Reader at some point, she thinks that they would be an amazing parent. Eventually, they do have Bela, Cassandra, and Daniela.

As for Miranda and the other Lords, they're all less evil (as mentioned previously). Miranda for instance is still trying to bring Eva back, but is not doing so by trying to kidnap other people's children this time.

Miranda and the Lords all genuinely care about and love each other as family in this series. Even if some would prefer not to admit it (Alcina and Karl). They all kind of found each other when they didn't have anyone else, so it's very much a found family type situation.

In the beginning of their relationship, Alcina had a hard time being convinced that Reader wasn't afraid of her. However, for Reader, it was something close to love at first sight.

NSFW: As an unexpected result of her Cadou, Alcina now has ruts and a knot (like in an omegaverse setting). She can and does enjoy sex outside of her ruts, but when she is in one, she's nearly insatiable. She gives great aftercare though!

NSFW: Has a lot of kinks, but would never pressure Reader with them. of course. However, if Reader shows interest in them, then that's another story entirely.

NSFW: These kinks include (but are not limited to): BDSM, mommy kink, breeding/pregnancy, blood (obvi), marking, pet play, cockwarming, wife kink (idk what else to call it but she loves when Reader calls her their wife, it really turns her on).

[auncerra]

“And Just Like That...” Sexual Iconography Left the Studio

It’s inevitable some sequels will jeopardize the integrity of the original. While the fanfare for a Sex and the City re-installment had some of us naively convinced in Michael Patrick’s capacity for keeping the nostalgic momentum alive, it rather played out like a dismal Judd Apatow commentary on the nearing middle-aged (à la a very tactless, banal, and frankly unnecessarily depressing blow of “This is 40″, in which audiences are left feeling like the concept of aging is the equivalent of a death row inmate’s last pile of reheated mashed potatoes, or in the case of over-acting, emphatic Parker (Season 2) - poached eggs, friends-with-benefits breakfast of one?)).

Season 1 (AJLT) introduced audiences to everything Sex and the City conceptually opposed, the original series almost diametrically opposite to the concepts of female and sexual empowerment, friendship, resilience, and heart-touching, resonant storylines and intimately-crafted, beloved characters viewers came to know and praise semi-religiously. While there are many areas to nitpick, including the dismal costuming, unnecessary, unresolved side-plots, vacant added characters integrated merely for their ‘woke’ box-ticking capacity and not for social value or plausible commentary, what I came to love of Sex and the City had been drowned like a newborn kitten in a self-praising writers’ bleach bath. We lost sex to hearing aids and ice cream toppings, or gained it in unappealing, almost grotesquely invasive showboating - i.e. Miranda’s ‘fingering’ in Carrie’s studio kitchen by the much-loathed, and not ‘somewhat’ polarizing, ‘Che Diaz’. Did we need Carrie bedwetting, a loose stream into an emptied Snapple bottle? Miranda’s conditioned facial reactions alone were enough to transport viewers to desires of chastity, of hillside convents somewhere in Romania where those CW-styled dream montages of the repellent, narcissistic Che can’t virtually survive. Note 2 (of loss) - style. Did we need Carrie’s vainglorious, bizarre hat display as she burbled out her apartment window, did we need rubber gardening gloves for a walking smoke-break? Do we need to be assaulted with plaid and tartan, pigeons for purses (thank you, Jen), Charlotte’s over-billowed poof-sleeves and polka-dotted, infantilizing displays, do we need a silver-haired Cynthia Nixon who reads more Paula Deen than tirelessly chic Miranda Priestly? ‘Gray hair don’t care’, as it were, embracing age, as it were, but should be that a singular note of character development - that the bold, independent, autonomous career-driven Miranda we knew and respected has driven toward total absence of discernment, dry as a withered martini olive for a non-committal new beau with zero attributes of integrity or general likability? And why style her (Miranda) as though she were being embalmed in prints, can ‘older’ women not show skin, have avid sex lives, exude standards beyond accepting consequences of bad backs and Peloton-claimed husbands (realistically, did Carrie’s shock need to last several minutes of screen-time, has she never heard of a heart attack?)...

Lines were crossed with Brady’s sex life and Miranda’s questionably appropriate presence throughout, lines were crossed with Porta Potty tampon insertion challenges, lines were crossed with daytime bathroom blowjobs (has that ever been identifying of the hyper-attentive, traditional Charlotte), lines were crossed with rehashed, overplayed attempts at racial justice and white martyrdom - yes, let’s address the concerns, but maybe not in the context of unfunny comedy and a socially-unhinged spin on Miranda - again, Michael Patrick, do native/residential New Yorkers really not have interactions with POC/the queer and gender-diverse in today’s age? Do we need props of characters for this representation, who are as scripted feeling as the tired attempts at the writing - do we need the original cast to become the most egoistic versions of themselves in decades of television, do we need a money-grabbing “Max” Series that respects less its audience of - generations - and their valid, informed takes on a, frankly, garbage-fire, catastrophic spinoff, do the writers need to make relevant social issues - like racism, like sexism, like transphobia, like gender and sexual expression - feel trite, tired, exasperating, and with the ambiance of capitalistically-targeted Pride ads? Che isn’t funny, isn’t remotely likable, and while perhaps not a reflection of Ramirez’s personal life (despite some apparent synonymous attributes and social media feeds), Che’s being non-binary does not make them suddenly exempt from being situationally-inappropriate, selfish, callous, and just plain ‘ick’. Che makes broader viewers want to curl up into a congealing ball, return to embryonic fluids to avoid their “comedy” shows (if the quantity of who they have fucked, will fuck, want to fuck of their - pause for emphasis - live audience members - is qualifiable as humor at all...). Che is not a queer cosplay of Amy Schumer, there are no human or relatable characteristics that make viewers embrace a character so visibly and audibly shallow, not to mention entirely exploitative (the entire subplot of uprooting Miranda from her city for a Los Angeles move, for example, which, if you have forgotten, Michael/millennial-coded writers, completely betrays the Miranda archetype - so, career, long-invested internship, scrapped, for a romantically-ambivalent, narcissist Diaz?). Did audiences need “Rock”, pacifying elementary rhetoric, did audiences need a bigoted hit on one of the few redeemed, likable original characters, Anthony - i.e. advising Charlotte against utilizing preferred pronouns, making an analogy to a dog?

While this is mostly a blurb, a working draft, a tunnel of quality-abandonment-fueled-apathy, Season 2, so far (from what I’ve discerningly, limitedly glimpsed), took “L.T.W.”’s barber-shop painting ensembles, Carrie’s (again, the most self-involved - in the pejorative - character of the show) “user” attributes and poor-me-sloppy-grieving arc, steadily unlikable roundabout cast of diminishing characters to new, (love-to-hate) lows, without the glimmer of a blip of Cattrall resurgence, the only remarkable term to describe this train-wreck of a ‘reinstatement’ return is abysmal. Frankly, I’d have more intrigue in a Seema-driven plot-line, nil-Carrie-Che-L.T.W.-Dr.-Nya-Wallace-couch-coital-post-separation-Bridgerton-Netflix-dupe-streams, re-introducing a viable Miranda in the acting capacity we’ve seen of Nixon (who is by all measures, extremely talented in alternate roles) - or merely limiting the sheer, inarguable box-ticking strategies to reveal something more human, watchable, intimate, and real, like the SATC that charmed viewers over concurring, mingling generations, that comparatively, was successful with good cause. This is another classic example of the media industry exploiting devoted audiences with nostalgic whims of shows that in reality have been massacred by weak writing, a cacophony of plot, and a favoritism towards the emblematic assholes (excuzes mon francçais) of its series - referring, of course, to the effortlessly problematic Parker (who I, with little hesitation, can see as far more of a modern-exploit Carrie than she’d care to own), of dropping unsubtle breadcrumbs of the beloved, real, irreplaceable Samantha, likely cajoling Cattrall into a payout for her four-minutes of other-cast-members non-interactive virtual series presence as a tactic to attract views, and up subscriptions. Frankly, by Episode 1 of Season 2, by Miranda awkwardly, anti-sexily adorning a full-bodied strap-on harness (in 2023, really?) as though viewers had been thrown into the rank, antiquated sex shop of some National Lampoon-era film, for one unamused, indifferent Che, by Che’s hasty, box-check-positioned assistant complaining over the status of their not wearing a jacket (namely, not a glaring, dated, sequined one) / the shrill “non-binary”-cooing mirror harlequin-dance exchange (bizarre to witness), by Carrie once again insisting all life resolve around her and her everlasting grief plot-point with the painfully, awkwardly-timed, shit-written kitchen egg, Charlotte pop-in entrance scene, I was already exasperated.

And Just Like That is the epitome of the negative denotation of ‘woke’, it plays as turbulently and as polarizing as its core characters, and is a dreary, complacent attempt at modernity, it is the flatulence of yet another capitalistically-motivated acquisition, it is not worth your continued patience that solely a Patricia Field, Cattrall, Chris Noth, zany-glitzy-Manolo-steel-jungle-Cosmos-wonderland epitome of Sex and the City, Sex and the City alone could and will ever seemingly be capable of delivering. And Just Like That...Cattrall’s heart-wrenching cancer performance is traded for Snapple-piss and Los-Angeles-beach-cleanup-chronic-codependency, for narcissistic writers, lead creators, and yes, in some cases, eye-roll-icon, socially-liked actors.

I don’t subscribe to cancel culture, but let’s communally hold this embarrassment of unglamorous television accountable, let’s make a commitment to peer deeper at the integrity of shows that capitalize on the marginalized to produce, in sincerity, sugar-coated bullshit.

[nightmare-deer]

I’ve loved Evanescence and goth music since around the same time. I like a lot of these choices. I’m a huge fan of Switchblade Symphony. Faith and the Muse, The Shroud, the frozen Autumn, Collide. I like Diva Destruction but it’s not a top tier artist for me.  

I personally like a lot of ethereal and dark wave music but I also like some more industrial or electronic leaning goth and some more punk leaning music. YMMV But I really like Lycia, Dead Can Dance, Love Spirals Downward, The Changelings, Black Tape For a Blue Girl, Cocteau Twins, This Mortal Coil, Miranda Sex Garden, Autumn’s Grey Solace, Qntal, Clan of Xymox, Unto Ashes, Mirabilis, Two Witches, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Echo & the Bunnymen, Dairy of Dreams, The Cruxshadows, Bella Morte, Rosetta Stone, Skeletal Family, Mephisto Walz, Specimen, 45 Grave, The March Violets, Android Lust, Rasputina, Claire Voyant, Sunshine Blind, Arcana, bel canto, Hannah Fury, Bella Lune, Attrition. Virgin Prunes. I like Alien Sex Fiend and The Cramps but listen to them a little less. I like a some more industrial artists where they’re veering into goth(?) territory like :wumpscut:, Helalyn Flowers, Ayria. I think Creature Feature is a fun band. I love love love The Birthday Massacre. You have the classics for Joy Division, Bauhaus, The Cure.  Actually, Ev is playing with some great gothy bands and industrial bands at Sick New World: Sister of Mercy! London After Midnight, Ministry, Skinny Puppy, KMFDM, Orgy, the Killing Joke. And these aren’t goth but I feel like checking out Portishead and Massive Attack is also a good idea. I feel like I’m going to forget someone I love. 

I think one of the best things about goth music is that there is such a variety so if you like Evanescence because you want heavy, dark electronic vibes you can find that. If you want more classical vibes or more swirly romantic vibes you can find that. You can find something more rock. I just spent a lot of time listening to various things and seeing what I liked and didn’t and some stuff I didn’t like at first but like more now.

I haven’t listened to Ghost Dance in a long time tho so it was great being reminded of them. 

And goths don’t only listen to goth music. I like a lot of rock and metal and moody pop and instrumental music. I don’t always claim the goth label because while I love the subculture I like feeling less defined for myself. But I’m a big fan of the music. 

My post on goth music for Evanescence fans in video format! CC in both English and Spanish. Please watch in app if you can.

The Spotify playlist is here:

The YouTube playlists for Dead Souls Rising and Requiem in White are here.

[likesomekindofcheese]

Promised Part Nine (The Great Series, Grigor Dymov x fem! Reader)

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: Mentions of sex, violence, death, marriage, and cheating, Y/N having some problems with her mental health and being petty, swearing, spoilers for season two, hurt/comfort, sudden fluff, angst with a happy ending, I choose violence at the end.

Summary: You are married to Count Grigor Dymov of Russia to keep an alliance between the Russian crown and your family safe. But you realize you have grown to love him and he has too fallen for you. You are forced apart during the Coup and once you return to the palace, you make a shocking discovery about your husband while you were gone. One that turns your excitement of seeing your husband into feelings of betrayal and heartbreak. But...what does your husband have to say about what happened? Did he really commit such a thing in the first place? What do your allies at the palace have to say about it? Will you be able to forgive him and will he be able to tell you what really happened?

COMMENTS AND REBLOGS ARE DEEPLY APPRECIATED!

Part One //Part Two //Part Three// Part Four// Part Five//Part Six//Part Seven//Part Eight

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They are standing in the garden... She takes his hand

...

Forgiveness. Can you imagine? Forgiveness. Can you imagine? If you see him in the street, walking by her Side, talking by her side, have pity They are going through the unimaginable- Lin Manuel Miranda

“All right, what is your plan?” Grigor asked. “Because she refuses to listen to me or let me in or even see me. Every letter I send to her, the serfs say she burns immediately without opening it to read it.” “Well, you figured out that part. Some gift won’t work.” George advised. She folded her arms and sat back down. “you’re telling me. Were you outside on the grounds outside my apartment the other day? I had arranged for the most beautiful flowers to be sent to Y/N as a gift to her,” he said, rubbing his hands together. “And?” “The serf knocked on the door with the gift, but the fucker said that it was from me to her. At once she opened the window and threw them out. Flowers falling like a rainstorm ten feet below to the grass. It was nothing but a trampled mess for the rabbits.” “She would have figured out that is the serf hadn’t announced it. Women don’t need or want flowers at this time, Grigor.” “It’s what they like!” he assumed, shrugging. “Have you tried explaining to her what happened?” He took in a deep sigh. “Every fucking day! At our first reunion, I tried. She would not listen to me, kept interrupting me, and insisted that I was lying. And remember, any letters from me she uses as firewood. If she actually read the, she wouldn’t be so…so…” “She’s emotional. Well, who wouldn’t be? You were emotional when I was with Peter…” Their eyes shined with the sad memory. The thought of what could be and what had been. George waved it away, her posture straightening and her gaze at him turning from soft to focused. “Anyways, that is not the point. The point is- you have to remove the barrier between you and her. And here is what you do…” He listened to her advice. And nodded, understanding. There was no need for him to write it down. He could always remember best by ear. Once George had returned to her own apartments, she went to her desk and wrote down a small letter. Placing it tightly in the envelope, she sealed it with red wax. She rang for a serf and as the bell echoed in her ears, she wrote in loopy cursive on the top. The serf entered and the letter was placed in her hands. “Do you know where Madame Dymov resides?” “Yes.” “Have this letter delivered to her at once. At least, slipped by her bed. Go at once and make sure it is safe, do not let anyone else stop you, and return right after.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It was the next day when you awoke. You could tell it was still a pink, dewy morning. At your side was a letter, “Asshole…” you muttered sleepily under your breath, but looking at the front, you read something different from expected.

“To Y/F/N DYMOV From George Please read immediately.”

You were still in the blissful state of having received sleep after such deprivation for a long time. Whatever George insisted on could wait. She probably found a new lover for you right away. Damn, she was quick. But that was no need for alarm. Once you got up, you walked outside. There was mist and the sky was lovely. It was cold and your bare feet shivered. There was a knock on the door. “Boris? You may enter!” There wasn’t a reply. “Boris, I said you could en…” Opening it up, you saw your husband. You backed one step but saw that on the tray was served a platter of breakfast food. Your favorite ones. “Where are the serfs?” you asked, eyes up and away from temptation. “I’ve given them a day off,” Grigor replied with a triumphant smile. He placed the tray in your hands. “Here you are, eat it!” he said. You blinked, unable to process what was going on. Was this the same bastard who betrayed you? Now he was bribing you into thinking what he did was nothing! He was probably with her just last night. Once you started eating your food, he would leave to eat her pussy. Definitely. “I..I…” “I will not leave you be unless you eat it.” He said. “Fine,” you mumbled angrily. His bargain and your hunger giving in. Unable to resist, you dug in. Grigor took not a bite, but sat, eyes drifting between your eating and the window. Finding though you still had a low appetite, you enjoyed the flavors. “Now will you depart?” “Not yet.” Once you returned the tray, you gave him a good, strong slap in the face. “Dickhead.” You muttered. “I’m getting quite used to that by now…maybe, we could use it in our bed sometime later.” “I’d rather bed the devil himself than you!” you cursed, eyes looking away. Only then did he leave…immediately leaving with buckets of hot water. “I…Grigor, you asshole…” “I will not leave until you have bathed and dressed. Y/N!” he ordered with a smug smile. “Stare all you want. Imagine I’m Marial and touch yourself to her body, dick.” You cursed bitterly as you removed your smelly shift. As you sat in the water, you were still. Only staring, glaring, letting that thought sink in. You looked directly, noticing small bubbles swirling and the steam rising and curling itself in the air. “Have you come to Marial’s tits yet? I bet the picture is still fresh in your brain!” you said, keeping your head down. “Y/N, you need to wash with soap…” he advised. He handed you soap and a sponge and you let him scrub your neck and arms. “There’s the rest of your body…can you clean that yourself or do you need help?” You handed him the soap and sponge and let him scrub more of your body. It felt…it felt nice, you admitted. And you could smell cherries made into the soap. Far better than you shift you hadn’t changed from in a while. “There you go…” He helped you wash it off. Once you had sat in the warm water and decided bathing was done, you got out, one foot preparing to step over. Then he offered his hand. Yours retreated. “I don’t want you to slip.” You accepted it. “Can you leave now?” you complained as you wrapped a white towel around your body. “I will not leave unless you are dressed…besides, I hear that the empress is wanting to speak to you. I can’t have you walk out to see her in a towel.” He added on. “I don’t feel like getting dressed,” you replied somberly. “Then I will help you.” He dried you off, squeezing extra water from your hair and patting your body dry. You let him move your limbs like a marionette. “There…remember our wedding night, you were so shy to show any part of your body in front of me. Personally, I thought it was adorable. Now you’re letting me towel you off, bare as a babe! I…I still remember that night fondly, I do. I still remember our wedding day fondly! I…I’ll never forget it.” You changed into your old green robe. It was the silk one you found for yourself right after the wedding, you recalled. Tearing up, you turned your back to him and tied it together. “But…Y/N haven’t you noticed the tray…you have a knife…” Taking the handle, he turned it over, giving it to you. He then got on his knees and placed his arms behind him. “Punish me, Y/N. Go ahead…” “What!” you gasped. “Go ahead, cut my cock off, gouge out my eyes, pull out my hair…No-kill me. Take that knife and stab me in my gut. I’ll take it. I’ve lived my life and you have earned the right. I am at your mercy and I’ll accept every fucking blow from you…go on and do it…” His eyes were up and eager, large as a puppy. A week ago, you would have gladly taken the opportunity to make yourself a widow. But now…that he was not resisting, and that the memories had flooded through you. That you had slept, food, a bath, and fresh clothes on…you felt that you could not. You lowered the knife. “I’ll kill you when you least expect it. Just…just wait until you’re in Maials’s bed. Then I’ll kill you there. “Fair enough. You will do that then. You know where her chambers are. The night you find me there, you may kill me, deal?” “Deal!” “It’s fucking freezing in here…would you like a fire?” “Yes…it is cold,” You agreed. He lit one up. “You’re the one always so cold at night. One thing I’ve missed-your cold feet sticking against my legs at night when we would sleep next to each other. At first, I felt like it was an icicle-but I’ve…I’ve missed it.” “You were always nice and warm when it got cold at night, Grigor…” He then got up and opened the drawers of your wardrobe. He shifted through some of your things and then settled on a frock, pulling it out before you like a lady in waiting. “Here…I like this one, it’s pink. It’s the color you were wearing when I met you. At that time I thought you were the prettiest thing I had seen in ages. After we were introduced, I remember Peter turning to me and saying ‘well, at least at the daughter’s beautiful! We should take turns fucking her after the dinner!’ My food got cold from the time I spent staring at you at the meal. And I had to make any excuse to sit by you after.” He gave you a fresh shift. He pulled it over your head and then put stockings on your legs. “I still wear that scarf you made me, every day I go out and wear it. Some men laugh at me, but I don’t care. Peter even understands! He’s so much…much more in love with Catherine now. You wouldn’t believe it. You’d hardly recognize him.” He then got your corset and placed it around you. “Let me know if it’s too loose or too tight.” You gave him short directions on how tight you wanted it to be. He then added the padding, and the petticoat and underskirts. He then placed the dress over you and buttoned up the back. “Usually a serf does my hair…” you recalled. “I don’t know how to style it as you like it, I’m afraid, but I can try.” You moved to the vanity sitting down as he stood behind you He began by combing your hair slowly. “I missed the sight of your hair. That way I knew it was you and no one else who I was seeing. Never thought any wig would do you the same justice.” He continued. He managed to secure it so that it was out of your face. It was simple, but it would do. He held onto the chair and leaned forward, you looked down at the vanity desk and his breath on your neck. “You taught me many things: that I could be happy at home playing cards, that I didn’t need to get drunk off of vodka every night, how I could move on from a broken heart, how to be patient, how to not shoot at every living thing, how to appreciate books and music, how to be honest, that I could like small dogs as well as big ones…and now, I know how to style a ladies hair!” You looked up and caught both of your reflections staring at the mirror. He smiled. “There…now look at you. Just like the night I met you first and every bit as pretty.” You let yourself smile. “I will escort you to the empress…if you need me to leave, say so. I will not leave your side until you tell me to... and” He turned you around and held both of your hands, kneeling down again. His large blue eyes looked right into yours. “I was wrong. I was wrong to even think of going to Marial’s apartments. I was wrong to let her kiss and touch me. I was careless and stupid and I…I…Y/N, I don’t deserve it, but one day in the future, even if I am on my death bed- will you forgive me…” “I might…” “I will be honest with you, Y/N…she has tried to speak to me. She has sent me letters…” From his pockets, he pulled out a stack of unopened envelopes. All in a feminine cursive with Marial’s name on the front and smelling thickly of vanilla. He threw them immediately into the fireplace. “I’ve read none and I will send her none. When I see her, I will tell her about you. About the great pain, this has brought to you. And I will end things with her. Permanently. God help me I will not speak with her after today…then…then you’ll be happy. You’ll smile at me and be at peace and…that…that would be enough for me. Do you approve?” he asked. “Y…Yes, Grigor” you confirmed. You sat by the fire, watching the letters crumple up and burn. What did they say? What did she write about? Perhaps sultry promises and detailed recounts of their nights. You could barely distinguish what it said due to cruel curiosity. But you forced yourself to look away, knowing that once you found out it would be too painful. Walking over, you looked at the letter to you from Georgiana. You were about to open it when there was a knock. “The empress asks for the presence of Madame Dymova in her parlor!” “May I be escorted by my husband?” you asked, picking up the letter. “Oh-yes!” You placed the letter in your reticule, strung it to your skirt, and joined his side. He walked with you through the halls. There were eyes and whispers. Some smiles. Neither you nor Grigor spoke much, only walking. A serf said, “It is Y/N who was summoned, not the count…” “I will stay outside and wait…” he said, clutching your hand before letting it go. ------------------------------------------------------------------------

Walking into, the serf announced your presence as Catherine stared at a new painting on her wall. Catherine turned to you and you gasped at the sight of her belly. “Oh! You’re pregnant!” “You didn’t know by now?” she replied, but with a cheerful smile and rosy cheeks. “Hello Y/N! I’ve just started a girls school and I’m making plans for the economy! How have things been with you now that you’re back!?” The smile on your face plummeted to a frown, the words flowing from you like poison. Yes, it was bitter, but it was the truth. “Did you know my husband had an affair with Marial while I was gone?” you asked flatly. “What!? No? I…Even for her, I’m surprised!” She set you a cup of tea. “Empress…can’t you get rid of her…” you begged. “I..I can’t. Yes, she has done some awful things. She even betrayed me to the emperor for the coup,” “Exactly! Catherine, you should have at least exiled her for that alone! You’re too quick to forgive!” you insisted. “She’s a bitch, but she knows that and that is who she is, I figured, and…she’s my closest friend. You should see her with the serfs. With her dog.” How could someone be both? How could Marial rub your face into how she humiliated you yet have a heart for the serfs? How could Peter make jokes about bestiality but apparently love Catherine? How could Grigor draw you a bath but still betray you? How could these people, as messed up and wild and horny and drunk as they are…also be funny, kind, and charming? How could something here be both ugly and beautiful? It was all confusing. “I just…my heart has been broken…and I…I know adultery is normal here…but it’s not normal where I come from….” You mumbled, feeling yourself wanting to cry again. “I’m so sorry…but…I know- I’ll offer to make laws about adultery. I can propose fines on behalf of the Russian Church and make it a punishable offense. Perhaps that would work? And…will you forgive her?” You placed the cup in your hand and looked down at it. “I just…I wasn’t good enough for Grigor…but…he still, likes me and I…I hate him and love him at once…it’s…it’s so confusing! How can you hate and love the same person?” “Trust me, Y/N, That sounds very familiar. I…I don’t have an answer for it. You have my empathy and understanding. But…I will suggest a law and tell her how deeply you are hurt. Since I’m her friend, she’ll listen to me.” “Yes.” You sipped on the tea, “Now let me lie down…God, I could use some dirt!” she cursed, waddling back to her room. “Please excuse me!” “Of course, empress.” As she laid down to rest her head, you tiptoed to her room to find that she was falling asleep. The clock ticked by. And your tea was finished. You remembered George’s letter in your reticule and opened it. You gasped and covered your mouth, seeing stars at the words.

“Dear Y/F/N, He confessed the truth to me. Grigor is faithful to you. Always has been. He was invited to Marial’s apartment. Marial forced him to kiss her twice and he fled her apartments. Kissing is as far as it has gone. They have not fucked. He has been avoiding her since. Avoiding her for you. He has been trying to tell you this whole time. He is right. I know him and I can tell when he is lying. He told me the whole truth. Please believe me. This nightmare you are going through is false. You have a loyal husband who loves you. You’re quite lucky for a wife here to have that. Now ask him yourself. And be at peace, dear girl. Sincerely, Georgiana.” --------------------------------------------------------

The woman he expected to come at him once he was alone arrived by his side. Besides, Grigor was right outside the chambers of Marial’s friend. Naturally, she would come. Her eyes furrowed and she folded her arms. “Did you get my letters?” she asked firmly. Grigor looked at her, glaring. Despite her extreme beauty, despite her attraction, he would not be moved. “Leave me alone…” he demanded. “Your pants say otherwise….” She said with a smirk down at the crotch of his body. “Fuck what my pants say…fuck what my body does around you. Listen to my words instead-I don’t want to see you!” he ordered angrily. “I need your help.” She insisted. “I’m in danger…” “You’ve destroyed my wife…” Grigor interrupted. “I have to be married…” she continued. “She couldn’t sleep or eat…” he cut off, waving away her concern. The words lapped over each other. “I have to be married now…” “Y/N almost cut me in bits…” “I have to be married to someone… I need you to marry me!” she explained. “She has been crying every night all night!” “If I don’t marry you-I’ll be forced to marry a child for my family!” There was a pause. “Marial, I am already married. And I cannot divorce. That is that…I don’t want to see, hear, or speak to you anymore.” He turned his head away. “You honestly would choose a sexless marriage to that boring prude over me?” she accused. He looked back with an impish smile. “Any day.” “She…she is hypnotizing you, blinding you…you aren’t yourself Grigor!” “Then you won’t like actually being married to me. Think about it- I have. What if we were together? Say we were married, what then? I have to be there for Peter. You fucking hate Peter. How would that work out? There are plenty of other men who will gladly marry you. I‘m not one of them. You’d take my cock but not my heart, my mind, everything else…” “I want you Grigor…your cock can’t lie. I see it hardening already, and you’re married to a nun!” “My marriage is not sexless and Y/F/N is fantastic at it, thank you very much! Marial- have you considered there’s maybe more to life than fucking?” “You’re out of your mind, of course not! We’re Russians, for fuck’s sake!” He stepped forward and pushed her away. “I don’t want to see you or look at you. Fuck off! Now!” he roared. She pursed her lips, then stepped forward, her eyes softening. “Oh…it’s her. She’s made you this way. Then, fine. I will not go back. I will not be a serf again. I’ll prove it. You love me and you know it. I’ll prove it…I always get my revenge eventually. Lady Svenska wronged me…and now Y/F/N has. I’ll give you one last chance. Divorce her and marry me and be happy…say no…and Y/F/N and Lady Svenska will have tea together soon…” He panicked, pushing her aside to run down the hall. Heart racing, he fled from the empress’s door and saw a group of people fanning themselves and gossiping in the light green hallway. “Could any of you tell me where Lady Svenska is?” he asked desperately. “Eating breakfast by now!” one lady in a cream gown recounted. “Thank God!” Grigor sighed, hands on his chest. One serf came forward, carrying a bloody towel in his hands. Boldly approaching and cutting into the conversation. “Actually, that’s not true…She’s dead. Right as of this morning.” “What!” Grigor cried, running up to the young man. “We went up to serve the breakfast she likes-poached eggs and toast. We saw her body slumped over her desk. Bullet holes right through her.” “Fuck!” Grigor screamed.

[unholyplumpprincess]

Donna Beneviento Headcanons

Gonna be doing all the Lords and Ladies! Alcina Dimitrescu and Karl Heisenberg done!

!Minors and ageless blogs dni, this is an adult work!

Warnings: R18+/NSFT below the cut, SFW above the cut, reader is gn and ambiguous, mentions of somno and consensual drugging

__________

• Angie serves almost like a best friend to her, so in sync that her thoughts are Angie’s. Though most people think that Angie is a projection of Donna’s voice, it’s more like her most internal thoughts without any social guidelines hindering her. Making Angie say things like when seeing someone’s cleavage. “Woah get a load of THOSE honkers.” while Donna herself would obviously Not say that aloud.

• After her parents passed, due to the trauma of it all Donna completely locked herself away- save for traveling to the other Lords’ and Ladies’ estates when needed. Agoraphobia prevents her from going pretty much anywhere else, but she did used to visit the local farmer who sheared sheep and alpacas and spun their own yarn and fabrics. And the local farmer that sold leathers.

• Donna is very anxious and quiet, non-verbal and finding it difficult to find her voice. Angie normally fills any silences that may happen, but even then sometimes she says things that have Donna scrambling to cover her mouth and shake her head, furiously blushing beneath her veil all the while.

• Donna enjoys all arts and crafts- not just doll making or sewing. But she likes knitting, coloring, painting, drawing, gardening, and even writing poetry. As far as knitting, sometimes she catches herself making baby clothes and smiling down at them. They normally end up being altered to fit a doll, but during Rose’s brief stay with her she had been delighted that some of the clothes she had made fit her. It also made it Incredibly hard for her to let her go until Mother Miranda snapped at her.

• As a lover, Donna is so gentle and giving. She speaks with her body and her hands, or Angie being her voice when she is unable. Normally Angie is more blunt than she ever would be, but if her partner finds Angie enjoyable then well, Donna’s hooked.

• Donna has spent so long alone that she’s mastered cooking. Being able to cook FOR someone is a dream come true! But that means she does a lot more baking and cooking, tending to watch you while fussing with her own fingers and clearly anxious about your reaction. You can always feel her beaming in the room when you compliment or say you especially like something.

• Donna’s love languages are physical affection and gift giving, emphasis on gift giving. She wants to make you clothes, buy you them, cook for you, feed you, sit with you, spend time with you. If you like your alone time- you may need to tell her that. She also likes her own solitude, but sometimes she forgets because she likes your presence so much.

• PET NAMES PET NAMES PET NAMES!!! Though Donna would much prefer to call you things in her native tongue and things like ‘My love’ ‘My treasure’ ‘My darling’, Angie tends to use...well...vulgar language. So your most used ones from her are ‘Hot stuff’ ‘Sweet face’ ‘Sugar tits’ and ‘Toots’.

• Despite modern technology, Donna prefers older technology. Including keeping her father’s old record player and records that she constantly plays through the house to keep noise around.

• Due to her mutation, Donna’s ability to secrete a mist that causes deep hallucinations and things like that can also cause other things. But Donna has used this against you in a good way, because when you’re in your ‘dream’ state, she can project herself to you and remove her veil and talk to you. She tells you in those catatonic states about how it’s easier because that isn’t ‘really’ her to her.

!NSFT under cut here!

• Remember what I said about her mist and how she uses it on you? Yeah. She’s also able to finally touch you in that state. And oh, oh is her mouth filthy sometimes when she’s like that. It’s her world, hers to manipulate and shift- and she uses it to her advantage to make herself more confident. Where her lips and teeth can press to you and she can murmur in your ear how long she’s waited to taste you. How she might do it when you sleep tonight and do not stir-

• In real life, Donna does not meet your eye when you are free of that state in the mornings. But you know she’s watching you, watching you rub phantom marks that do not lay on your skin despite you knowing you’d felt her touch there. But you enjoy the way she squeaks when you look at her with a coy little look and a smirk on your lips as if asking her if that’s really how she wanted to play.

• Donna also is...very talented sexually. But not from experience. She has hundreds to thousands of books in her house and a majority of them in her bedroom. A lot are on things like botanicals, foraging, dollmaking, etc. But a lot are of things like sex positions, basic sex ed, to downright raunchy and kinky things and safety behind them. You’re just basically her test dummy for all the things she’s been waiting to do.

• Talented, talented, talented hands. She can make you come undone from them alone. Very soft hands with light callouses on her fingertips and her knuckles scarred over from all her wood working and sewing. Her nails are always trimmed short, something you could simply pass as her needing short nails to work. But now? Now you know better.

• Her top kinks are: Somno, consensual drugging, breeding kink, and shibari. Somno comes from her desire to touch you, but her fear of you seeing her. Plus she just likes how...peaceful you look. Consensual drugging- same thing, but she also feels a sense of power behind it. Breeding is due to her wanting a family, ofc, and shibari is her liking artistic things. And seeing you in such a state, my, she might combust.

• She’s a huge service top. She just wants to please you and make you beg for it. She also enjoys when you’re dreaming with her, and she’s able to slink her fingers into you and brush your lips together and steal every breath and gasp you make as she raspily praises you.

• Be careful of this shy girl. She can only hold herself back so long before she must mark you and claim you as her own.

[sparklingnight02]

Pride Month modern AU headcanons

Hey guys! In celebration of my first ever Pride Month I get to celebrate as a fully out, bi girl, thought you guys who are possibly interested in my modern AU some of you may have seen on my wattpad I mentioned in another post would be interested in headcanons for how the characters celebrate Pride Month along with other headcanons related to their sexualities and other stuff like that!

-For their sexualities, Karl and Alcina both are pan and hate that they even share the same sexualities lol.

-Donna is bi and makes it VERY obvious lol in later chapters! As you'll clearly see lol! She's also demiromantic so although she's willing to occasionally sleep with others without the relationship, she can't really fall in love with someone she hasn't known beforehand.

-Salvatore is gay although didn't know it until college so would still try to go on dates with girls in highschool and such only just assumed he's never found the right person yet.

-In their teen years once they start learning about this kind of thing, Bela is actually bisexual although isn't interested in dating at the time.

-Cassandra is asexual/homoromantic although identified as aroace because she didn't think you COULD have a romantic relationship with anyone and NOT have sex, plus being a bit of an introvert, generally just found ALL people annoying lol so never actually cared for anyone in that way before.

-Daniela is gay through and through and got a girlfriend at 16, although didn't tell anyone right away until she got caught kissing her girlfriend in the park one day by some random, nosy, busy body homophobe.

-Miranda actually identifies as homoflexible as although she mostly was interested in women, she's found the few men she WAS willing to sleep with she actually enjoyed it although usually generally prefers women.

-Ethan is actually bi although wasn't really aware of it until Donna jokingly asked if he'd be interested in Karl if he were single to which after thinking about it, realized he either has a thing for women AND men, or just a thing for women and KARL lol! (Ethan Winters haters, get outta here, this fic has him in it and if you can't respect I ship him and Alcina just don't read this book then)

-Rosemary is actually homosexual although is aromantic which had Ethan MAJORLY relieved lol about the fact he probably won't have to worry about who Rose dates lol or about an accidental teen pregnancy lol!

-For how they celebrate Pride Month, Alcina and her daughters usually go ALL out! Alcina makes sure they all have at least ONE rainbow item on their bodies! When the girls were young these were usually just a little rainbow necklace for Bela, rainbow face paint for Cassandra, and a little rainbow skirt for Daniela, while Alcina usually just wore a rainbow neck tie, although as they got older, the girls switched to Bela wearing a rainbow cap with "Love is love" written on the front, Cassandra would just wear rubber, rainbow bracelets, and Daniela would have a rainbow hand fan to stay cool in June, while Alcina just continued to wear her tie. Alcina has also put a miniature rainbow flag on her car antennae and a giant rainbow flag hanging off the edge of the balcony on the front of her mansion (because of course this woman would be rich lol).

-Donna isn't usually as out there with showing her support although still shows it but just in more subtle ways, usually she just paints her nails rainbow and plants flowers to look like the rainbow and bi pride flags in her garden, she's noticed a funny pattern with this where only LBGTQ+ folk seem to notice these things while the homophobes she usually tries to avoid never do, she finds it funny how it's the perfect way of still showing those who would care about this stuff she still supports them, while also avoiding those who would get stupidly offended over it and attack her for it.

-Karl doesn't usually celebrate Pride Month as openly as the others although will still show his support by having a rainbow patch of sorts temporarily sewn onto his shirt or something or will have some kind of rainbow pride sticker on his motorcycle or helmet. ('cause FUCK if Karl on a motorcycle isn't hot as FUCK!! 😍😍😍)

-Sal on the other hand is even more obvious than the Dimitrescu's lmao! Going all out with gay T-shirts and tiny rainbow pride flags he takes everywhere with him and has a giant gay pride flag rainbow painted over the entrance to his place and just has all SORTS of cheesy pride paraphernalia basically everywhere, even having temporary pride tattoos on his face, the others all think it's cute though how excited he gets about Pride Month though and don't really mind.

-Despite actually liking women, it probably doesn't come as much of a surprise to any of you, Miranda doesn't celebrate Pride Month, if anything she doesn't even really tell people ANYTHING about her sexuality so most just assume she's straight lol, although before she went all insane she actually DID use to go to pride parades in the past and even in the modern day isn't really against same sex couples really, she's just against ALL couples PERIOD lol, at least under her roof! So at the very least she's fair about it lol to some extent! 😂

-Ethan and Rose generally just celebrate Pride Month with the Dimitrescu's and follow in their traditions of having something rainbow somewhere on their body, even before Ethan knew he was bi and identified as straight he still wanted to show support for his daughter and her friends and basically adoptive mom lol.

-For any of you who have read on LBGTQ+ situations in Romania though, it probably doesn't come as much of a surprise though that a lot of them have to sometimes face the occasional homophobia and in the unfortunate case of Karl, Donna and Alcina, bi/panphobia as well, although not that often in person, a few times on the internet they've had to deal with people accusing them of 'betraying the LGBTQ+ community' by being in 'straight passing' relationships, as if being with someone of the opposite gender suddenly erases the ability to still be attracted to people of the same sex or erases the B in LGBTQ+.

-Daniela's girlfriend has actually also run into a similar problem, although she identifies as lesbian, she's actually a gynephile, which has led to her running into the problem of lesbians getting mad at her for identifying as that because although MOST people she's attracted were female, she isn't attracted to women ONLY and is more generally attracted to femininity, so has actually stated she WOULD actually be willing to date a GUY if he's feminine enough and actually has a guy friend she said she'd be willing to date 'cause of how feminine he is, busty body, long, soft hair, wide hips, soft, feminine face, and is not above cross dressing or wearing makeup.

-Luckily though among all the homophobia and biphobia and panphobia though they also get a lot of support from others also outside the LGBTQ+ community as well, Donna and Karl getting tons of support from people on the internet as well about what a great couple they make and Alcina and Ethan being jokingly told they still come off as gay themselves but in a straight relationship lol because of how Alcina is clearly the one to wear the pants in the relationship lol!

Anyways, those were my Pride Month headcanons guys, hope you enjoyed learning a little more about this AU and for any of you who doesn't like the Donnaberg or Alcithan ship or just don't like Ethan or straight ships in general, just don't read this and don't go crazy over the fact I have different, slightly unpopular opinions, just stop reading if you see something you don't like and scroll past!

[uniquevocashark]

A Good Servant

Part 1 of ?

Summary: You would do anything to keep her happy: be it keeping her pet healthy, running her house or making her wine. Everything but for what you both want.

Some content warnings for this part: there's heavily referenced sex/sexual activity, pet play (not with the reader, this is an angsty prologue fic), brief mention of adultery, casual contemplation of murder, brief mention of whipping and a joke made about catholics. If I missed anything that you think should be tagged, dm me and I'll add it.

--

You start down the hallway before you can stop to think, holding the tray aloft in one hand. It's very easy to hear the strangled sounds of Lady Dimitrescu's most recent pet, some twenty something woman from the village, which only makes your job that much harder.

As you had been here for quite some time, you knew one of the most taboo acts was to interrupt her during 'training'. As you got closer you could hear her voice clear as day, offering soothing encouragements before the snap of a crop reached your ears.

You stop just before the door, wondering briefly if she'd use it on you for interrupting. But you couldn't send the heads of the other families away, so you steal yourself, rebalanced the tray and knock thrice.

There's a shuffle and her pet screams louder than before, followed by a half slurred string of begging and moans.

You purse your lips. You knock again, thrice, harder this time. You finally hear the Lady curse, some Romanian word you can't quite grasp yet, followed by quick shushing of her pet. You hold the tray carefully and take a precautionary step back.

She slams the door open and you catch a fleeting look at her black silk underwear before you shift your gaze into the room. Her pet, whose name you don't know and dotn care to learn, sits uncomfortably on the floor beside her masters bed.

"What is it?" Lady Dimitrescu snarls down at you, and you look up at the filigree decorating the wall beside her head.

"The Heisenbergs and Moreau are here to see you, Madame. They bear a seal from Mother Miranda." You handover the letter one of them gave you and fill her glass while she reads it.

You drop a bit of her special wine into it and hand it over. She eyes you carefully, taking a lemon slice. "Help me dress." She says and walks back into her room.

The hallway beckons but you follow her in anyway. She won't kill you, not while Mother Miranda has need of you, but you know she forgets how fragile people are sometimes. Her pet is a keen example; she clearly hasn't slept much due to her servicing, she's bruised all over and the way her lips wobble stirs some momentary pity in you.

Unfortunately for her, any stronger feelings have long since been cut away and seeing her in such a state only brings up questions of how you can improve. Still, you try to put on some faux sympathy for her.

You fill the smaller glass and hand it to her pet with a small platter of apple slices. When you look over to Lady Dimitrescu her brows are raised.

"She hasn't eaten for two days, Madame." You say instead of explaining. It had been one of the cooks ideas, someone that knew her.

Clearly, Lady Dimitrescu didn't realise that, "Of course," she replies crisply, her tone too sharp, "You may eat, pet."

Without waiting, you walk over to her closet to pick a dress. They are the same style and differ in their colour scheme; three are the same shade of light cream, twelve are pure white and three more are tinged grey. You pick out a light cream one with matching undergarments when she calls you over.

You've been working for her a long time, excess of seven years, so you know how she prefers to be dressed after stringent activity. You slip her bra on and her underwear. Slowly, you put her stockings on, as to not rip the expensive fabric, and clip them to her garter belt.

Lady Dimitrescu choses which garter she wears each day rather than have you or her personal amod do so, today it is the one that tangles easily. Its notorious among the staff for how difficult it is to put on. You know your way around it, though, fastening it quickly about her hips and thighs. "Have you put any thought into what I asked earlier, Madame?"

Lady Dimitrescu scoffs, sipping her water, "I have a personal maid." She jerks her chin to her pet, who has been munching as quietly as possible on the apple slices.

"Yes," you say lightly, helping her step through into her dress, "I merely doubt she will have time to deal with any duties other than those of a pet."

She eyes you dangerously and sets her cup down. You ignore the passive aggressive ploy to retrieve the step ladder in the closet. You flick it open and climb it as you pull her dress up, admiring the muscles of her back when she flexes subtly, then guide her arms into the sleeves.

"Who do you recommend, my gracious head of staff?" She croons when you work your way up the buttons of her dress.

You overexargerate your sigh at her playful tone. You catch her smile in the mirror and go back to buttoning. It is much harder to accept some days that this cannot last forever.

"Jessica is a cheery and dedicated worker with a strong back for lashings should she ever disappoint," her pet looks at you with mild horror that you file away and you try to strain your voice a little more towards reluctance, "Mihaela may suit your temper better, she has a quiet nature, has little care for material things and does her best to avoid punishment." That and her aggressive asides about the Lady would stop if she wanted to live.

Lady Dimitrescu moves over to her vanity, and you follow, grabbing the scissors attached to your chatelain and three roses from the vase on her desk. "Who else?" She asks, flicking the cap off her lipstick.

"Louise may suit as well," You say as you clip the stalks, "but Miss Daniela has taken a fancy to her. It would not be the wisest choice. There is also Rachel but she is pregnant with the gardeners child."

"Leave it to humans to rut like base animals on my property," she taps her lips thoughtfully,  "Wasn't Rachel married?"

"She is, Madame."

"Do you remember to whom?"

You pause in your arranging of the flowers on her breast and she catches your eye with a smile that burns you, "It was to the southern most butcher. One of the Bradleys, I believe."

She clicks her tongue, breaking eye contact, and you move to brush her silky hair out before she repins it. "Tell Heisenbergs retainer to have her husband brought here. It may be time to cull that wretched family," she paused, sipping again at her water, "Also, Mihaela will do, inform her after the meeting."

"Of course, Madame." You set the brush down, and grab her powder, dusting it onto her cheeks as she fixes the curls back into her hair. She is most beautiful like this, when her face turns delicately pensive and she stills almost completely. You almost wonder what it would be like, with her, and have to take an extra second to cool your heating face.

When she turns to you, with that deliberate, unabashed affection stealing the faux indifference from her face, it makes your heart quake in a way you haven't felt before. You have to look away before you both do something stupid. Deliberately, you plant your hand on her shoulder to keep her at a distance and stare intently at her ear as you put her earrings on.

Her pet has come to sit at your feet, Lady Dimitrescu running her fingers through her hair and you vaguely wonder what it would be like. What if you were there instead and what if this and that and everything else you could want but can't have. Neither of you will cross Mother Miranda.

Her pet gives you the dishes, the glass and plate empty. You move away from them, so that you're not tempting anything again and refill the glass.

"Shall I also have inquiries made about a new gardener, madame?" You ask as you hand the glass back, then move to gather together a suitable outfit for her pet.

The softness is gone from her face and you tell yourself you're glad of it. "Yes, someone more appropriate."

"Not a Catholic then?" You ask innocently. She chuckles warmly and you go about dressing her pet with a little smile. "And would you prefer the current one be brought to your daughters or sent straight to the cellar?"

She regards you seriously in the mirror, and you stare back into her golden eyes before returning to fixing the bow on the back of her pets dress, "Bring him to me when I'm next available."

You usher her pet back to her seat, putting the cups back on the tray, "That would be after dinner for today, or at three tomorrow evening."

"After dinner will be fine." She replies, eating the rest of her lemon. She hands you the skin, her fingers brushing yours deliberately, and you take longer than needed to deposit it on the plate.

"The families are gathered in the dining hall, Madame. I had the kitchen staff prepare a light brunch."

"Tell them I'll be there momentarily."

"As you say, my Lady." You curtsy as you leave. You make a note to have Rachel serve dinner and to watch the Lady's pet while she's busy. You may even go so far as to ask the cook to make a broth; this pet seems to make her happy and you are determined that her pet remains able to do so.

It's all you can do, after all.

Hey, little note:

This is a multi chapter fic with a planned unhappy ending because Courtly Love Trope doesn't usually end well. There will also be references to Resident Evil lore from previous games. Do I care if its accurate? No, not at all. Resi purists beware this fic. And thanks for reading!

[flour-cloud]

Henlo fandom! Now we explore that angst situation where Alcina is drunk by a excessive amount of maiden's blood and passed out in front of Donna's door. Mention of: self-inflicted pain, blood, tortures and loss of children.

It is a cold, dark night. When that forgotten-by-Gods village had a night with a full moon and shining stars? Something that was remotely...nice? Alcina was devastated by Ethan's murder of her daughters, she managed to survive by pure accident and the basements smell so good, that place looks so inviting and tempting: darkness, loneliness, silence. Peace. A dead woman rotten to the core clearly belonged to a place with that aura. A long,red,solitary tear run from her eyes to her neck all the way down that white, burned and ripped dress she loves so much. Alcina put her head under the blood line in a tub full of sanguine Virginis than she walks out the door. That disgusting human stole the body of her angels after the fight. If the vampire had a heart she probably would ripped it off her chest. The lady of the castle try to sit on chair made of iron spines in order to feel something different. Maybe that inflicted pain is the proof she has a heart,but one that does not pump anymore. If she peeled her skin maybe she would find crystals, something more noble than that rotten corpse that she is.That numb in her mind ... she was unable to say a single word about anything. The blood she drunk is restoring her body-structures and organs, but she has no urgency of breathing. Suddenly,when the moon reveals itself trough clouds Alcina decides to stand up and drink some more. Her head only reminds her how disgraceful that behaviour is.

So Alcina walks for minutes,for hours, ignored by monsters on the streets,by animals. And she passed out in a foggy zone she does not remember .

Angie opened the door.

"Mom! That tall busty woman smalls bad! Maybe is dead! Can we use her skin? May I have her claws? We can cut them off! " suggests the creature .

It is not usual that Donna moves to the front door from her chamber and her laboratory in the house,but when Angie calls mom should be there, no? A woman passed out at her door? A tall,busty woman? Maybe Alcina? That sounds bad. She paused for a moment and she looks down at her feet the big, stained and smelling body. "Call for help,Angie " Donna decides abruptly "no,darling, you can't have claws from her,she is alive. Very alive, stinky, but alive".

A bunch of clowns and creepy broken dolls help to transport Alcina inside.

Donna is disappointed when Alcina's blood stained the elegant sofa, she scrunch her nose a bit. "Now what? I am bored,mom". "Now we wait, Angie, come here" that authoritative and quiet calls is enough for the doll to obey happily.

Alcina opens her eyes.

"What happened?"asks Donna "miss, what happened?".

"I ... Bela,Cassandra...Daniela" the vampire tried to speak with a bit of fake confidence "they are gone. My precious angels are gone" more blood more tears more stains shaking in her big, massive body.

"Ethan" Donna is clever and fast in deduction "I have to give him the second piece of that baby".

"Miranda will scold you" a fake answer to something that was not a question.

"I am not afraid of her" Donna answers "are you afraid of Mother Miranda?"

"You should. She is immortal until we gave Rose pieces" tells the vampire. Alcina breathe instinctively for a moment and she looks at the veiled woman "she took you,darling,why disrespecting her?"

"Why fight to live without hope of a win? Why to live without the ones we love? We were chosen by mother's, but we are us, we ... feel. She doesn't. I am supposed to be grateful but Mother Miranda only expanded my sorrow."

The whole debate happened trough a doll. A demonic,creepy,doll that Alcina found incredibly creepy but well preserved. The lady scans the room with the eyes able to see in the dark: well dressed dolls with perfect hair and the finest jewelry on the shelves, the flowers and the toxic flowers on the table, the finest piece of furniture. That woman shows taste in art and wood pieces. Alcina looked at her hands: pale long fingers with nails painted in black.

Donna suddenly look distressed and she disappeared in the deep of the house. The conversation was too much for her fragile mind. She need some space and Alcina was not in the mood to follow her.

Time goes by, Ethan got the baby part, but Donna is still alive. Alcina hide while all happened.

Alcina does not know why that dolls were so fascinated by her. Not only Angelica was possessed and possessive, but she started to follow her with a big scissor in her tiny hand. The woman takes her up one day:"Mom she picked me,mom!"the doll screams from the top of her lungs.

Donna remained silent.

Alcina show a vague interest in the demonic creature, but she acts sweetly when the focus is on her: someone like her cannot be bothered by a minuscule doll.

"Are you afraid of heights?"

"I want your claws! Mama does not want me to have them, but they are beautiful and sharpened!" she laughed hysterically.

"You have to listen to your mother, sweet creature" she whispered "mother knows best".

"You have daughters! I remember mama told me about them".

"I had . They were killed by Ethan". It is the first time Alcina can say it out loud, verbally. That sentence sounds unbreakable and definitive, but true.

The doll sits on her shoulder:"You are so tall madame, I can climb you. I still don't get why you choose my door to pass out a week ago".

Ah,the voices shifting, Donna is back from darkness.

"Do you want to climb me specifically, Donna,or is that a little joke from your doll?". Alcina does not have idea if she was flirty and why. The artist does not want to makes Donna close herself again inside her dark mind.

Alcina thought about the last time she met the dollmaker, that elegant, dark and melancholic figure that speaks only by her doll. In the past week she saw Beneviento dress, the creative process of her creatures. "She has daughters that will never be corrupted by Miranda" she thoughts feeling the sadness arise in her chest.

Donna in her room is sewing faster than usual. She missed a point. She is distracted, she is afraid and that sentence in mind:"Do you want to climb me?" What does that mean? That woman has no shame literally and Donna does not want to be touched by anyone. Maybe Angie could do some work with her body and that vampire was enormous. Ugh. Too much to process.

Donna Beneviento decide she should do something about the vampire question in her room downstairs.

"I am sorry for the loss you experienced " Donna declared with her firm and soft voice "I want to give you something" . The creative act is sacred to Donna, she infused the presents with magic and dark force but the looks,oh, the details, the refined painting and the matching capes. Every doll has its own blade and insects made by gemstones on the dresses.

Alcina collapsed on her knees and then looked to Donna who keep an unreadable expression under her curtain. "You should stop drink this much, madame. I cannot stay here every night of my life listening to bad jokes about sapphic sex".

Donna run away and Alcina takes two big breaths in, two out. These dolls were identical to her daughters, it was a gift by Donna , a sign of her attention to the loss and mourning the woman faced.

No, her daughters did not die forever. She takes the dolls and cuddle them, she held them onto her chest.

What was that about sapphic sex? The vampire rolled her eyes.

Also Angie climb up to her. She wants to be cuddled and hugged.

"You'll may be my new second mum if you stop scaring mama Donna" she warning the woman.

"I am not scaring your mother and I was still drunk".

"Don't try to justify yourself!" That scream again from empty lungs not used to work properly. Alcina avoided a blade from Angie. "Mom appreciated you eradicated flowers Miranda gave us. Mom wants to be happy. Mom wants to be safe ".

Alcina ripped the horrendous flowers from the house and the garden one of the morning after she get drunk. Alcina as a perfect lady was not able to keep her hands out of Donna's house that was... dirty, if she had to say kindly. The lady decided that an act of good can do better than a dozens words of wisdom.

"I did it because it was necessary: if she wanted to be freed from Miranda's power the flowers are a first step".

"Mom knows that you are kind and considerate. Sometimes. When you do not eat human flesh, she doesn't like that behaviour ".

"It is not something I decided to start: It is a consequence of the mutation Miranda induced" the vampire defends herself.

"She knows,but she does not like it anyway" replied Angie" and she also think you two have two talk when she feels better". Alcina agreed

The next monday Donna feel better to face a conversation. At 9.00 in the morning,Donna shows up at the table .

Alcina looked at her:"How are you,darling?".

"Scared" answered Donna " and tired. Do you still have some jokes about sex? I find sex repulsive".

"I find sex interesting. But I am the one here who is trivial and coarse isn't it?" She smiled " so you are interested in me but not in sexual situations. Ok" she sipped a little of blood tea.

Beneviento didn't expected that fast acceptance for her condition about their relationship. Relationship? Oh God. She looked at Alcina.

"Is that ok for you?".

"Incredibly ok" answered the vampire lady "you host me in your home, you gave me your couch and you use your magic for me without doubting a moment. If I have to renounce sex for all of this...fine. your doll is far more interesting to me than a vagina".

"Thank you". The only thing miss Beneviento was able to think about was "thank you" like a broken neon.

The vampire nodded :"yes,I know, I am fabulous and awesome and I eat human flesh but darling,I would be too perfect If I didn't. You have fetus in the hall".

"It is an allucination" said Donna but she laughed "do you like it? Sometimes I call it Roger".

"You give your hallucinations names?"asked the woman.

"They were the only thing I had before your drunk depressed night walk".

"So I did the right thing somehow" decided the brunette, happily .

"No, but I am not in the position to criticise your choices ".

"You did it right now".

"I prefer to call what I did - exposing facts-" Donna take the tea.

Alcina laughed and also Angie.

"You have very strange reaction when you are afraid. So you need another mom for Angie?"

The dollmaker was quiet for a moment:"Yes. And weren't you the one who was happy with climbing up to each other?".

Sassy. Donna Beneviento is incredibly sassy when she feel enough strength and emotional involvement with someone. Alcina loves it.

"So can I climb on you?"asked Angie to Alcina" now you are my mom!" The little doll was delighted with her new person in the house.

Alcina gave to Donna a long,intense and funny sight. The question implied is clear to them both.

Maybe Donna also needed a mom sometimes. Maybe her damaged mind blurs the lines between the affection she missed and the affection she is getting,but that's not important. She is happy again, the house is full of living presences. A vampire. Oh,the irony...

The doll hugged mom Alcina strongly.

Miranda punished Donna for the misbehaving and the Ethan question, she suffered again and she came back home struggling to breathe properly because of the tortures she faced.

Alcina preserved her and protected her till the end of their time. The explosion and the mold died was a relief to both of them. Angie was broken,but Donna opened her single eye with the face covered in blood. She snuggled into Alcina arms for a moment covering her dress with stains, the vampire cleanse the veils in a fountain and put them back on Donna's angelic face, giving her a kiss.

"Sleep,darling, you are tired" Dimitrescu murmured while caressing the hair of the other woman on her lap "sleep,I am here. We did it. Ethan won".

"I want to be drunk right know" Donna declared and gives Alcina a kiss, a long, intense blood-tasting kiss.

"Nah,darling,better this way. I am sure tomorrow you will be at work for something that can climb up to me and I have a maiden to crush".

"Probably " answered Donna "but please,do not left the couch dirty. I have only one couch" and she fall asleep after a long time, hand in hand with someone who loves.

[highlifeboat]

Mother Miranda: I hear you slept with the gardener, i like you are trying to be normal, but with a woman. You know, you can be more normal. An aro/ace Donna very confused because she only shared her bed because there was no other bed, and she was just polite: What?, Thank you?, Angie help

Mother Miranda: Thank God you're finally over this 'no love no sex' business. I just wish you were straight like your brother. But I'll take a touch of normality over none.

Donna, very much still aro/ace: I-

Mother Miranda: Did you stop hanging around Alcina's children? I have a theory that blonde one is why you're like this in the first place. Bad influences, his type.

Angie: Fucking WHAT?

[spookyvalentine]

oc profile:

thanks for the tag @aceghosts !! i always have so much fun doing these. imma snag @irikahkrios @battlemastershepard @vizarding @comefeedtherainn​ @yellingaboutmasseffect​ @zet-sway​ and have at it if ye wish me mateys!

General-

Name: mercy shepard (no middle name)

Alias(es): shep, coach (from sports coach au)

Gender: agender

Age: i haven’t quite figured out how long i hc 3 to be, but by the end of it, maybe thirty four, fiveish? if you count the years their body was on the table. mercy... doesn’t really. at least start of 2, when asked their age usually what fell out of their mouth first was thirty one. (for sports coach au they’ve just turned thirty one)

Birthdate: april 11? 2154. day isn’t really known for sure? they were found several days old

Place of birth: unknown! but they were left at st. bernard parish fire department, louisiana while still a fresh baby

Hometown: their most stable home was around lake martin, when they were taken in by the henrys. around thirteen they went to juvie in new orleans, and that started their urban feral teenager life. eventually they move out to another megacity (havent figured out which one yet lmao) and meets kasumi

Spoken language(s): they’re pretty adept without the translator. mercy is fluent in english and creole, passable french and korean, and readily picks up phrases in other languages. after being reconstructed, a translator was literally built into mercy. they resent its presence sometimes.

Sexual preference: open. they’ve been too damn busy to even think to seek out experiences, but aesthetically admire all sorts

Occupation: spectre and alliance officer. enormous pain in the ass before that

Appearance-

Eye color: gold. not hazel or brown ‘til in the light type thing. when anderson first saw those odd lantern eyes it made him think of the foxes that liked to linger at the edges of his parents garden when he was growing up

Hair color: somewhere between summer wheat and spun gold. darkens a little, when not planetside

Height: 6’2 >:)

Scars: they have some from the thresher maw, some acid scars on the left side of their body like thick webbing that cut through parts of a tattoo. maybe got part of their ear. and one they got as a kid that sliced across their face. and then they were rebuilt, and what was left in their place were those glowing lines. (sports coach au they still have the thresher maw scars)

Favorite-

Color: greens

Hair color: favorite hair color on them??? they’ve never dyed their hair before, only crazy haircuts

Song: its not mercy’s favorite song bc i dont know how i’d even choose right, but the song that i have in my head for them is falcon in the dive from the musical the scarlet pimpernel (which fucks severely, also just do yourself a favor and listen to this too because christine andreas makes my heart stop beating. wow. WOW yes i will push it on everyone)

Food: clementines, satsumas, mandarins—any sweet citrus that peels easily (oranges are more work, but will be eaten if they’re around). persimmons, figs. cotton candy flavored grapes. cherries, peaches. they’re a very big fruit bat, basically. they get hype for an alien produce stand

Drink: day to day? chicory coffee, lapsang souchang, soda water. Sometimes lemonade or apple juice. for booze, theyre down for a beer. really likes a good whiskey. delights trying homebrew moonshine. ‘you made it in your bathtub? you went blind for two minutes? hell yeah i’ll have a glass cheers’

Have They-

Passed university: they went through officer academy and all that n7 training, does that count? 

Had sex: once in a relationship w thane, yeah boiii 

Had sex in public: …maybe? that is um. something to explore 

Gotten pregnant: never, also not possible

Kissed a boy: yes, although for these situations ‘been kissed by’ is maybe more accurate

Kissed a girl: yes, see above

Gotten tattoos: yep! they have two large pieces from before being arrested and negotiated into joining the alliance. they start under the jaw and both sides of the neck, going across the shoulders, along and down the arms, coming to an end on the forearms, and they shelled out for that fancy ink, that’s a little bit holographic/iridescent, where the colors would shift and glint in the light as they moved. obviously they’re gone when miranda rebuilds mercy, but they’re absolutely still around in the sports coach au 

Gotten piercings: had a handful of ear piercings as a teen, but has mostly stopped wearing them, for practical reasons 

Been in love: falling in love for the first time 

Stayed up for more than 24 hours: oh lmao yes for sure 

Are They-

A virgin: not anymore babeyyyyy

A cuddler: with people they are very close to

A kisser: oh yeah, big time. really into it now

Scared easily: nope! if anything, has adrenaline junkie tendencies 

Jealous easily: nah. sometimes when they were a teen growing up on the streets, but not anymore

Dominant: in bed? still figuring things out there. maybe sometimes. in life? they’re not domineering, but will shout people down if it comes to it

Submissive: also still figuring that out in bed ;) absolutely not in other situations tho. if theyre being submissive theyre usually up to something 

In love: learning what its like 

Single: not once mercy realizes what they’re feeling for thane (there was a lot of facepalming from kasumi and frustrated yelling on this one)

Random Questions (tw for self harm/suicide mention)-

Have they harmed themselves: i mean, through some of their harebrained, reckless ideas where the possibility of getting hurt is assured but they don’t care, yes

Thought of suicide: maybe a little, after akuze

Attempted suicide: no

Wanted to kill someone: oh absolutely homie

Have / had a job: yeah, pulling peoples heads outta asses

Have any fears: oh for sure, mind control and zombies, and even though now they know how to kill one down absolutely dead--thresher maws 

Family

Sibling(s): none, but kasumi is basically one

Parent(s): unknown. they had some foster parents (adoption was never approved) that offered mercy some important years of shelter

Children: no biological kids. but they feel powerfully parental feelings for grunt, jack and tali. kolyat and oriana too, eventually. in sports coach au though (more details to follow soon), jack is theirs. after akuze they got on the scent of cerberus early, and therefore busted down pragia while jack was still a lil kid, who pretty much imprinted on mercy

Significant other: thane, and in sports coach au, irikah + thane

Pet(s): their fish. they’ve got names like hand roll, don and chip

[child-of-hurin]

Are there any songs that remind you of the Narn, just out of curiosity

-@outofangband

Okay I made a list of the ones I had fresher in my mind, might update it later, THERE ARE SO MANY I'm sorry but this was so much fun actually....... These are the songs that when they come up on shuffle, they immediately send me into Narn mode. I'm a little sad to see I don't have any specific for Húrin :'( my man...

ONE CONDITION: I want to know which songs YOU associate with the Narn! You and everyone reading this send me your Narn music… I demand

Some instrumental ones:

Tchaikovsky’s Marche Slave reminds me of the First Age Edain as a whole, I think the musical narrative of that piece of music fits so well

Porpora’s Second Lesson from Darkness

The whole Shadow of Colossus OST

The track “Anger Towards God” from the videogame Okami

The Shadows, “Man of Mystery” (makes me think of Nienor specifically)

Empyrium “A Pastoral Theme”

whole family:

Miranda Sex Garden, “A Fairytale About Slavery”, which I also use as a meta tag occasionally

How long have you been lost down here? How did you come to lose your way? When did you realize that you'd never be free?

The Bravery, “Bad Sun”

We are liars like the summertime, Like the spring, we are such fools, Like fall we are false prophets, Like winter, we are cruel (...) Someday back when we were young, I guess something just went wrong The two of us are hung from the same twisted rope

Chet Baker, “Always You”

Whenever it's early twilight I watch 'til a star breaks through Funny, it's not a star I see It's always you

Wild Nothing, “This Chain”

And I don't know just what I got myself into All I know is I can't let go This chain won't break Because of you

Cocorosie, "Westside"

I'll wait for you until the streets become sand And all the ceilings in New York have come down I'll wait for you until the stars dominate the skies again

Chelsea Wolfe, “Spinning Centers”

When the minute goes by faster than the feet When the winter passes slowly as defeat When the face of death is after me spinning Only dream of me, only dream of me

Death Cab for Cutie, "I Will Follow You Into The Dark"

The time for sleep is now But it's nothing to cry about 'Cause we'll hold each other soon In the blackest of rooms

Siversun Pickups, “Kissing Families”

It's everything that is connected and beautiful And now I know just where I stand Thank god your heart is too close This can be the bitter end I know it won't

Skeeter Davis, “The End of the World”

Why does my heart go on beating? Why do these eyes of mine cry? Don't they know it's the end of the world? It ended when you said "Good-bye"

For Túrin/Nienor

Chico Buarque, “João e Maria”

It was fated, now, that the make-believe would end like this Beyond this backyard was a neverending night, Since you left this world without a word of warning. And now I was a madman, asking of life What more would it yet make of me

Lana del Rey covering “Goodbye Kiss”

Doomed from the start, We met with a goodbye kiss When I broke my wrist.

Bjork, “Joga”

Emotional landscapes, they puzzle me Then the riddle gets solved and you push me up to this State of emergency How beautiful to be State of emergency Is where I want to be

Skeptor, “No Alarms and No Surprises”

James Blake, “Barefoot in the Park”

I call off the chase Who needs balance? I'll see you everyday

Peter, Bjorn ad John “Young Folks”

If you knew my story word for word Had all of my history Would you go along with someone like me?

It doesn't matter what you did Who you were hanging with We could stick around and see this night through

Chelsea Wolfe, "Green Altar"

In this house of rapture I am fit to love The language of nature in sine curve The shimmer beating heart of universe I'd been waiting, I've been waiting long Such love could make an atheist turn to god

Florence and the Machine, “Heavy in your Arms”

My love has concrete feet My love's an iron ball Wrapped around your ankles Over the waterfall

King Dude feat. Chelsea Wolfe, “Be Free”

Your face like a painting in your historic mind But you barely survived, and you're barely alive Those rules of lost days that we buried in time I carried the baby, it felt dead inside

Morwen

Gillian Welch, “Annabelle”

When I'm dead and buried I'll take a hard life of tears From every day I've ever known Anna's in the churchyard she got no life at all She's only got these words on a stone

Semisonic, “Secret Smile”

Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile And you use it only for me

Nienor

Yo La Tengo, “Speeding Motorcycle”

Juliano Holanda, “Ouriço”

How careless of me, to step on your quills It’s that habit of mine, of gazing at the sky, My mind unfixed, soaring with no wings. Sometimes I bump into the furniture; And other times I trip on the paths themselves. How careless of me, to step on your quills.

Chelsea Wolfe, “The Mother Road”

Guess I needed someone to break me Guess I needed someone to shake me out It was you

Anna von Hausswolff, “The Mysterious Vanishing of Electra”

My feet are not enough to save me His search is not enough to find me You search through the forest and the bottomless sea And you cry Push the trees, push the sky, push the air aside You look at their faces and their meaningless loss And you cry Who is she to say good bye?

Loney, Dear, “Harm / Slow”

Time didn't pay attention to me at all Time didn't show kindness to me at all I fell asleep in the lion's mouth

That's how I fell for you That's how I fell from the top of twelve stories to the ground For the reasons I have, The ones I know, the ones I don’t, For all I forgot That is all I could do That is how I want you

Beach House, “I Do Not Care For The Winter Sun”

Snowflakes that fall across my eyes Cannot compare to a dark surprise What's new becomes old, what's old is new When I first laid my eyes on you

Wild Nothing, “O Lilac”

Lilac, I feel your last lies come straight from her eyes Tonight, should you rise above, I regret love, I regret love And you have ghost hands on, that can't hold you up And you have ghost hands on, I can't hold you up

Daughter, “Run”

I don't know what we're doing I don't know what we've done But the fire is coming So I think we should run

Tokyo Police Club - “The Nature of the Experiment”

It's not the way my mother talks It's not the people that she mocks It's the nature of the experiment It's the patterns of my temperament

Túrin

Wild Nothing, “Pessimist”

Boys don't cry, they just want to die Stumble and cough, grin or lie

Joe Cocker “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood”

I'm just a soul who's intentions are good Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood

Portishead, “Wandering Star”

Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved The blackness of darkness forever

Portishead, "Roads"

I got nobody on my side And surely that ain't right Ohh, can't anybody see We've got a war to fight

Albert King, “Born Under a Bad Sign”

Born under a bad sign Been down since I begin to crawl If it wasn't for bad luck You know I wouldn't have no luck at all

Tom Petty, “Refugee”

Tell me why you wanna lay there And revel in your abandon Honey, it don't make no difference to me, baby Everybody's had to fight to be free

The Prodigy, “Spitfire”

Nina Simone, “Sinnerman”

MorMor, “Heaven’s Only Wishful”

You could kiss the lips of fate The less we know the less it drains us

Finduilas

Cibelle, “Green Grass”

Lay your head where my heart used to be Hold the earth above me Lay down in the green grass Remember when you loved me

Fauré, “Le Secret”

Would that the morn were unaware Of the name I told to the night, And that in the dawn breeze, silently, It would vanish like a tear. Would that the day might proclaim it, The love I hid from the morn, And poised above my open heart, Like a grain of incense kindle it. Would that the sunset might forget, The secret I told to the day, And would carry it and my love away In the folds of its faded robe!

Silent Hill songs that work too well imo:

- Alex Theme (Machinehead remix)

- Hell Frozen Rain

- Shot Down in Flames

- You’re not Here

Ratatat Minimix [youtube link]

1. We can't be stopped 2. Nostrand (Morwen) 3. Gettysburg (Túrin) 4. Falcon Jab (Nienor) 5. Biddang (Sunset at the Stone of the Hapless) 6. Seventeen Years (Húrin) [Hiden track: Wildcat]

[cuntess-carmilla]

do you have any recs for ethereal wave bands? i already know classics like cocteau twins, dead can dance, mephisto walz, lycia, and faith & the muse and it's quickly becoming my favorite goth genre but I feel like it's probably the most "obscure" kind of goth music

It is the least popular of the "big 4" subgenres and as much as I love it, it did peak in the 90s. :(

The ones you listed are some of my faves but others I love are Mors Syphilitica, Requiem in White and This Ascension.

Sopor Aeternus isn't Ethereal really but we all tend to group them there because it's very Neoclassical with an early period of Renaissance-inspired music and I fucking love their discography. I haven't taken the time to listen to them but other big names in Ethereal are Black Tape for a Blue Girl, Miranda Sex Garden, Love Spirals Downwards and Love is Colder than Death. There's All My Faith Lost... too, also haven't dedicated much time to listen to them but I like what I've heard from them, very relaxing and acoustic. Another I haven't listened to too much but liked from the bits I heard is Rhea's Obsession.

From the more synth-based side of Ethereal there's SRSQ and Claire Voyant.

[grungnr]

Good to know there's no limit! Here are the names I've picked: Emily, Christopher, Josephine, Matilda, Matthew, Cynthia, Gertrude, Angelica. Hopefully that's not too much, feel free to choose whichever you like the most <3

E - Emily by New Rules

M - Maniac by Conan Gray

I - Ice Queen by Baekhyun

L - Love of My Life by Queen

Y - Yeah Right by Joji

C - Crawl by Breaking Benjamin

H - Have Faith in Me by A Day To Remember

R - Rotting by Green Day

I - Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls

S - Supersonic by Oasis

T - Tomorrow Comes Today by Gorillaz

O - Odchodząc by Republika

P - Polly by Nirvana

H - Happy Alone by Kings of Leon

E - Edge of the World by Faith No More

R - Ryd by Steve Lacy

J - Janie's Got a Gun by Aerosmith

O - Ordinary by Like a Storm

S - Starlight by Written By Wolves

E - Everything's Cool by Lit

P - Paradox by August Burns Red

H - High School Reunion by Nerf Harder

I - I'd Rather Drown by Set It Off

N - Negative Nancy by Adore Delano

E - Everytime by boy pablo

M - Miranda Beach by COIN

A - Alone by Heart

T - The River by Good Charlotte

I - In Between by Beartooth

L - Like a Stone by Audioslave

D - Dead to Me by Kali Uchis

A - And It Spread by The Avett Brothers

M - Maneater by Daryl Hall & John Oats

A - Artificial Love by EXO

T - Troubled Mind by Cannibal Kids

T - Televisions by Current Joys

H - Holidays In The Sun by Sex Pistols

E - Elephant by Tame Impala

W - We Didn't Start The Fire by Billy Joel

C - Creating God by Avenged Sevenfold

Y - You Don't Own Me by Lesley Gore

N - Now Or Never by Godsmack

T - Trauma by Seventeen

H - Heart Of Glass by Blondie

I - In Bloom by Neck Deep

A - Answer by Ateez

G - Given Up by Linkin Park

E - Everybody Wants To Rule The World by Tears For Fears

R - Real Love by rei brown

T - Talk Me Down by Troye Sivan

R - RED by The Rose

U - Uptown Girl by Billy Joel

D - (I Just) Died In Your Arms by Cutting Crew

E - Englishman In New York by Sting

A - Artistic Groove by Taemin

N - Nightmares by Palaye Royale

G - Green Eyes by Coldplay

E - Earfquake by Tyler, The Creator

L - Lemon Tree by Fools Garden

I - I Need You by Saving Abel

C - Careless Whisper by George Michael

A - Awesome by N.Flying