#i love you John marston

[burdock-root]

“I’ve always been ugly, Dutch.”

[prancingfawn]

sometimes I think about how John had to not only hold his (basically) father at gunpoint and then watch him kill himself afterwards bc he couldn't pull the trigger.

And then I think about how he had to go down the mountain knowing he would find his father's corpse.

And then I think about how he just watched his corpse knowing that that was in fact the man who raised him and his (basically) brother.

And then I think about how he had to watch Ross shoot his corpse with his own gun because John still couldnt bring himself to do it.

And then I think about how I'm about to follow Dutch's footsteps.

KILL ME KILL ME I CANT DO THIS PLEASE

why is red dead so fucking sad I'm going to bomb Rockstar games (I am not going to do that don't sue me rockstar)

[bearieio]

what a gentleman

[synthsays]

Chamber of Reflection - Mac DeMarco

[fshfish]

modern rdr ive been cooking

[arthursfuckinghat]

The ONE time Charles cracks a joke around John and it flew right over his head - bless these men

[4agnar]

I LOVE YOU JOHN OMG KIS SKISS O LOVE IVLEIVEO AAEAEAUEHAUHAUHUGUHAGUHAGAUH

johnnnn 💜

[messrmoonyy]

Molly O’shea | Shady Belle

[obsessedwrhys]

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ HER FURY

ᯓ★ Reader has EXTREME emotional detachment/anger issues, enemies to lovers trope (?), John loves to rile up reader, angst (mention of r-word but it doesnt happen dw), slight gore?, lots of funny shi tho, intense smooching but nothing crazy 🤯, reader is fem!!! (Literally writing this instead of doing my assignment, didnt proof read I rushed)

ᯓ★

Pairing you and John up for any mission was a recipe for disaster. Yet Dutch doesn't seem to catch the memo about the chemistry between you both. You HATED John and he? He enjoys that you hate him. As a matter of fact, he gets the thrill out of pissing you off. Because everybody and I mean EVERYBODY at camp knows you have a bad temper. It's just some of them happen to value their life instead of testing your limits.

Nonetheless Dutch had asked of you and John to confront a company man in Saint Denis. The details were that he had a contract that you needed to steal from him. You didn't know much but all you knew was that he played the chief into giving up all his property to the him and with the crew needing help from the chief, this was the only way to do it.

You're never a complainer when it comes to being assigned a mission but since you're being paired up with John and not to mention being told to do it this early in the morning.

You were pissed.

"Can't believe I'm doing this in the morning... Out of everyone Dutch should know I'm not a morning person" You cursed before riding off with John matching your pace on his horse.

Hearing your muttered curses, he can't help but smirk.

"Ain't that the truth. I don’t think anyone in this gang is a mornin’ person" He said.

"Oh shut up" You simply replied.

John doesn't say anything but chuckle at your annoyance. Eventually you two made it to the city, you both dismounted your horses and tied them to a nearby hitching pole. Even in the early morning, the city of Saint Denis was already bustling with activity, horse-drawn wagons passed by, and people hustled and bustled about their business.

John and you made your way through the city, eyeing the people around you and listening for any clues about the man Dutch sent you to hunt down. As you made your way down the sidewalk, you couldn't help but glare at every businessman your eyes laid upon. The way they speak and act just manages to tick you off. This however caught John's attention.

"Ain't you just a ray of sunshine" He sarcastically said and it made you look at him with your brows narrowed.

"What?"

"What? You're scarin' the city folks, that's what"

You scoff.

"All these rich folks just make me all pissed off. Actin' all high and mighty like their lives are worth more than the poor. It's all about class 'til you're talking to someone beneath you"

John chuckled, his eyes following your gaze as you glared at the next businessman walking past you.

"I don’t blame ya. Most of these fools wouldn’t last a day out there tryin’ to survive. They ain’t got any idea what it’s really like" He said and you somehow found yourself nodding to his words.

Suddenly your eyes stopped at a figure hurrying outside a tailor shop. His appearance fitting the very description Dutch had provided you. You nudged John with your elbow and you jerked your head towards the target. John followed your gaze, his eyes landing on the man you pointed at. He studied him for a moment, taking in his features and behaviour.

"I think that's him" You said.

"Seems like it" he answered in a serious tone.

"He’s in a pretty big hurry to get somewhere, ain't he?" He pointed out the obvious.

"Well let's make sure he doesn't get there" Before you even finished talking you were already going after the man.

The two of you started following the man while making sure to keep some distance as to not raise any suspicion. Eventually, the man's route lead the two of you to a quieter part of the city, away from most of the people. John shot a glance your way, a silent question in his eyes of what to do next.

You don't say anything but the mischief on your face somehow answered that question in his head.

"Hey!!" You called out to the guy who's body tenses at your voice. Despite you trying to plaster on a smile, it just made you come off scary.

"What do you want? Money?" he asked gruffly, his hand reaching for something inside his pocket discreetly.

"Money? Is that what you think what my kind is always after?" You approached him slowly and John simply watched from a feet away, his arms crossed with a glimpse of amusement on his face.

He had to admit, this is always the best part of being paired up with you.

"I heard from a birdy that you've done something terrible... you wouldn't happen to be familiar with the chief now would you?" You placed a hand on his shoulder and from how the man's eyes widened slightly at your question and the hint of nervousness displayed on his face.

You knew this was the right guy.

"And who might you be? A-And why should I tell you anything about my business with the chief?" He asked, his tone guarded and wary with suspicion.

When your hands came down to smooth out the wrinkled fabric of his suit, he yelps at the sudden tuck of his tie. You laugh it off.

"I'm simply a nobody but I know damn well you tricked the chief into giving up half his property to your company. Now I don't care what you need it for but there's nothing more that I hate than a lying scum" You flash him a smile before grabbing him forcefully by the jaw. Your action causing him to panic.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about! Let me go!!" He stammered, his mask now slipping away to reveal his true self.

"Give me the contract sir and you won't be leaving here with a broken nose" You casually spoke and John stepped a feet closer to the scene.

"Just do what she says sir" John added and the man looks between the two of you before finally nodding quickly.

"O-Okay!! It's in my pocket!!" He said and you gave him a warning look before releasing your grip on him.

He took a few deep breaths to steady himself before taking out a crumpled piece of paper. You raise your eyebrow as you took it from him, then unfolding it to read the words written on it properly. Once you were sure it was the real thing, you turn to face John who has a small smirk on his face from observing the confrontation.

"Well, well... that was quite the performance darlin" He said, taking the contract from you the second you handed it to him.

"I ain't your darlin" You said as you walked past him and back onto the city streets. He chuckles softly while following you from behind.

"Oh, that's right. You ain’t my darlin’, you're just someone extremely stubborn and bossy who I gotta follow around all day" He said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Glad we've got that cleared out"

Suddenly the sound of a whistle pierced through the air. John's expression darkened at the sight of the lawmen headed at the direction of the two of you.

"Great, now the law is after us. Figures" He remarked at the turns of events but you were already halfway getting onto your horse.

"Are you plannin' on staying?!" You shouted and he didn't need to be told twice as he quickly got on his horse.

The two of you quickly rode off and you checked over your shoulder to see several lawmen hot on your trail. Their guns firing as they tried to stop you from escaping. John, too, was firing his pistol as he rode, his aim steady and focused. You let out an annoyed groan before taking out your rifle and began shooting at the reinforcements coming from the left.

"Now I'm thinking if I should have killed the guy!" You shouted before shooting one square in the face.

John chuckled grimly as he watched you take out another lawman, his focus still on the ones from behind.

"Maybe you should've done us all a favor and put him out of his misery. Would've saved us a whole lot of trouble" He said and with half of them taken out and some on their way. You quickly looked around for an escape route.

"There!! The trees!!" You pointed.

John followed your lead, steering his horse into the trees as you both hid together. The two of you waited silently, the only sound the rapid beating of your hearts as the lawmen rode past, their horses' hooves thundering against the ground. Once they were out of sight, John let out a breath that he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

"Well, that was a close call" he muttered, his voice a little out of breath.

"I suppose I should be thanking you for getting us into this mess in the first place, then?" He manages to say even after barely making it out. You shoot him a death glare.

"Now I'm wishing Dutch had picked Javier to come with me" You said before galloping the way back to camp.

John raises his brows out of shock at your sudden confession. Quickly and almost desperately, he catches up to you and rode alongside you.

"Oh, come on, I ain't that bad" he countered, his tone feigning offense.

"You're worse" You said and like always, you rode off in a haste, leaving him completely behind. He sighs as he watches you go.

-

Once you made it back to camp, John arrived right after you. He got off his horse and he watches as you hand Dutch the contract before heading to your tent. When he tries to say something to you, you gave him a middle finger with your back facing him. Clearly noticing you're not in a good mood, he shrugs and walked away.

John had an amused look on his face as he stood beside Arthur, the two of them watching you practically storming inside your tent.

"She's quite the firecracker, ain't she?" John said and it had Arthur chuckle, a mischievous glint in his eye.

"Oh, that she does" he agreed with a smirk on his face.

"Although I gotta say, it's rather entertaining to see her riled up" He added.

Just then they see Uncle headed towards your tent. Clearly looking to ask you for something.

"This can go wrong in so many ways" Arthur observed.

The second Uncle made contact with your tent, that was it.

"GET OUT!!! GET THE FUCK OUT!!" You shouted and threw a candle that merely missed him by the head.

John and Arthur couldn't help but burst out laughing as they watched Uncle trip and fall on his way from your tent. Everybody knows that you hate getting your alone time interrupted, especially when you're tired or had just came back from a rough mission so anyone who tried to talk to you was practically asking for it.

"That poor bastard" John said, wiping a tear from his eye while Arthur's laughter was subsiding slowly.

"I gotta give him credit for trying though. He's either really brave or really stupid to approach when she's in a mood like that" Arthur chuckled.

Soon Javier joined the conversation, confusion and curiosity shown on his face.

"Well speak of the devil. Just in time to witness (Y/N) in all her glory" John said and Javier raised his brows in surprise.

"Ah, is she in a mood again? I thought I heard her yelling from all the way over there" Javier said and mirrored the other two who were standing and facing your tent.

"You heard right and apparently Uncle was unfortunate enough to be the first one to try and talk to her" John said with a slight smirk on his face.

"Poor bastard probably got an earful" Javier shaked his head with a chuckle.

"But I wonder why she's always so angry, there has to be a reason to her anger" Javier spoke and it sparked something inside John's mind.

He always figured it was something apart of your character so he never thought to view things like that.

"Who knows? Dutch found her in the woods alone, starved to bone and yet she still had the energy to fight. She was only 9 and she never told us why she was out there all alone" Arthur answered.

"Poor girl"

"Yeah"

As the two kept on talking. John was standing there with his arms crossed as he's completely lost in his mind. The one question he never thought he should pay more attention to.

Why were you angry?

-

The evening came fast. Everybody was busy doing their own thing and John was simply relaxing by the chair until he heard sounds of giggles. The voice was awfully familiar so he got up to follow the source of the sound. To his surprise he found you playing with Jack by the grass a bit further from camp. You were teaching him how to make a flower crown and John couldn't help but notice the one on top of Jack's head.

"Well, I'll be damned" John muttered.

"She's a natural isn't she?" He jumps slightly at Hosea who pretty much came out of nowhere.

"Looks like she's got a soft spot for the kid" He added as the two watch you laugh when Jack began stressing over the steps.

"More like a natural pain in my ass" John said and Hosea snorts. The sound catching your attention almost immediately, the second your neck snapped towards their direction. The two knew what was coming.

"THE HELL ARE YOU TWO LOOKIN' AT?!" You cursed while amusingly at the same time were covering Jack's ears.

The sight was enough to have John grin.

"I didn't know you were a real softie for the kid!" He said while Hosea decided to leave for the sake of his safety.

"I bet you even read bedtime stories to the boy"

"She does!!" Jack said and you couldn't contain the betrayal on your face when you turned to look at him. Seeing your face, John laughs.

"Can I get a piggyback ride auntie (Y/N)?" Jack asked so innocently that you couldn't stay mad at him. You simply nodded and he giggled with excitement as he settled onto your back.

"Say the thing!!" Jack said and you awkwardly looked at John from the corner of your eyes to see him looking all curious.

Ah... this is so embarrassing...

"All abroad the (Y/N) express..." You said with less energy than you usually do but regardless Jack was having the time of his life.

This just made John burst out into laughter. If he thought he hadn't seen it all, he does now.

"Damn kids got a good grip on you" He said, following you as you carried Jack around the camp. Your expression stoic while Jack was acting as though he was flying.

"Good I wouldn't want him to fall" Hearing you say that, John couldn't help but let a genuine smile slip.

"Of course you wouldn't" He said, his tone more softer and now less teasing.

The second it was night time, it was your turn to patrol the grounds. You walked around, rifle in hand as you were on high alert and watching for any potential dangers. It was peaceful you had to admit, just you and the sounds of the trees rustling through the wind.

You continued on your patrol until your ears perked up at the sound of footsteps approaching. You turned around almost in a blink of an eye, rifle drawn at the figure nearing towards you... only to see it was none other than John.

Of course it's John.

Why wouldn't it be John?

"Can't you just leave me alone?" You asked while he had both his hands raised up.

"Wow now, I just wanted to keep you company"

"God you're like a poodle. Wouldn't leave me alone" You said as you lowered your rifle and continued on the path of your patrol. He snickers at your words.

"A poodle? That's a new one"

You simply ignored him hoping that he'll go away but instead he followed you. After a few moments of silence, he spoke up, his tone a little softer than usual.

"So, what made you suddenly decide to take Jack on your back and act all motherly-like?" He asked and you were hoping he would drop that topic by now.

"What do you mean? I'm always like that" You response made John raised an eyebrow, a hint of surprise in his expression.

"You? Always motherly?" he chuckled, his skepticism evident.

"That's not the impression you usually give off, darlin"

"Oh please I can be nice. It's just some people don't deserve that from me"

"And who exactly doesn't deserve your so-called kindness?" he inquired, knowing very well that the list was probably long.

"People who just keeps on pissing me off" You look over at him for a quick second that if he wasn't looking at you from the start, he would have missed it.

"You mean, like me?"

"Oh you just happen to be at the top of my list" John chuckled, clearly enjoying your blunt honesty.

"I'm honored. It's good to know that I'm holding the top spot on your list of people you hate most" He said with a sarcastic voice.

After what felt like minutes of walking around, you let out a yawn as you decided to rest by a log. John stood by where you're sitting, his arms crossed as he tilts his head at you.

"Exhausted?" He asks.

"Of your shit? Yeah, just about"

He rolls his eyes at your reply before making himself sit down beside you. You stare off into the distance, at the brightly litted camp. He stared at the emotionless look on your face. Almost like all joy was sucked out of you. Sensing this might the best time and the only time he'll get, he decided to ask something.

"I heard that Dutch found you alone in the woods when you were 9. How'd that come to be?" He asks and you were still for a second before your eyes turned to look at him. With the way you were staring at him so coldly, he was wondering if he had pissed you off.

"... how would you understand?" You asked and he paused for a moment, his expression hardening slightly.

He understood your hint that you didn't think he would understand how you felt, which rubbed him the wrong way. He let out a scoff, his irritation growing.

"I ain't some damn fool, darlin'. Don't assume I can't empathize with you just cause I ain't the most sensitive person in this gang" He said and you stared at him a little longer before letting out a defeated sigh.

"I grew up in a poor family. Everyday it was a struggle to even put food on our plate. So one day my deadbeat father thought it would better off selling me and my sisters to some rich perverts. I fought like hell to run away. In a way I thought it would be better having my body torn apart by the wolves than to have a man touch me inappropriately" You said and every word that came out of you made John's mouth go dry.

It's no stranger that majority of everyone in the gang had their troubling past but to hear it from the very person who barely ever expressed themselves. It was different.

"I hated my dad. Fuck. I hated my mom more for not doing anything. The more I grew up, the more I grew to hate everybody. This ain't even the life I wanna live so what's the point of loving it" You cursed, your hands now clenching into a fist.

"So you hate everyone because of what your parents did to ya? Don't get me wrong, they sure can rot in hell for what they did but for you to keep everyone at arm's length? Don't you think it's a bit lonely? Living like that?" He said and you looked at him.

"You're the one telling me this?"

"I'm just sayin', pushing everyone away ain't gonna fill that loneliness inside you, darlin'." He said.

You stared at him, contemplating a bit while John held your gaze, his dark eyes studying your face intently. He could see the conflict in your expression, the internal struggle you were having with yourself. He shifted slightly, leaning closer towards you. His voice was low and earnest as he spoke.

"You can't keep running from your feelings, darlin'. Sooner or later, they'll catch up to you" He said.

"And what if they hurt me again?" You said and guilty enough your eyes trailed down to his lips which made John's breath hitch as he felt his pulse quicken for a brief moment before he quickly composed himself.

"What if they don't, darlin'? What if you're just letting your fears control you? Letting you miss out on something great? On moments that could possibly make you feel alive again?" He said, forcing his voice to remain even and steady.

Alive...

You looked at him and he swore he has never seen you this vulnerable before. So when you leaned in towards him, John's heart skipped a beat. Your lips inches apart that for a brief moment he thought you were going to do something unexpected... but then you pulled back, quickly standing up and breaking the closeness between you two. John felt a pang of disappointment in his chest, though he quickly masked it with a neutral expression.

"Where you going?" he asked, his voice slightly hoarse.

"To sleep" You said, rifle held by your side as you went. He doesn't say anything as he remained seated on the log. He let out a sigh and turned his gaze towards the ground, his thoughts a tangled mess in his head.

-

For the next few days, John had noticed the subtle changes in your behavior. He realized that you were deliberately avoiding him. You would steer clear of him whenever he was around, finding tasks or conversations to distract yourself elsewhere.

He couldn't help but feel confused and slightly hurt by your distant attitude. He hadn't done anything to warrant such coldness from you, and the only interaction you'd had was that brief exchange in the woods. So he figured it was because of that night that your behaviour have changed towards him.

John's irritation began to grow as your subtle avoidance continued. He couldn't understand why you were suddenly treating him like he didn't exist. He was used to your usual hostility, sure, but this was a different kind of cold shoulder. So there's no other solution but to confront you.

One evening, after the camp had quieted down for the night, John approached you while you were sitting alone, sharpening your knife. The second you became aware of his presence, you quickly got up and tried to leave however this time he stood in your way blocking your path.

"Now hold on a moment, we need to talk" He said firmly.

"There's nothing to talk about" You said and John grew annoyed at your dismissive response.

"Oh, there's plenty to talk about... You've been avoiding me like the plague for days now. Can you at least tell me what the hell I did to deserve this silent treatment?" He said and you couldn't help swallow anxiously.

"Maybe have you thought that it isn't about you?" You said and once again tried to walk past him but as predicted, he stood in your way. His body almost towering over yours.

"Don't give me that horseshit, I ain't blind. You've been avoiding me like the plague. And every time I try to talk to you, you practically bolt in the other direction" He said, clearly growing more infuriated.

"I'm a busy girl!"

"A busy girl, huh?" he repeated sarcastically, his tone laced with thinly veiled anger.

"I ain't buying it. You've always found time to be a pain in my ass, and now suddenly you're too damn busy to even look at me?"

""What the hell do you want from me John?! You just looking for someone to put your anger out on?!" You raised your voice and John wasn't afraid to match your tone.

"Maybe I am! Maybe I'm sick of your goddamn attitude, your constant need to push everyone away. You ain't fooling anyone with your coldness. You're scared!"

"I'm scared?!"

"Yeah, you're scared. You're scared of letting anyone in, scared of letting your guard down. You act tough and distant 'cause you think it'll keep you safe. But it's all just a—"

Before he could continue on talking, you suddenly grabbed him by the collar to kiss him on the lips. The action clearly caught John off guard, his surprise evident on his face. But his body responded to you despite his confusion, his own anger fueling his reaction.

He returned the kiss passionately, his arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you against him in a tight embrace. The kiss was fierce and consuming, both of you releasing all the pent up frustration and tension between you two.

John's hands ran over your body, his touch greedy and possessive. He pressed himself hard against you, his body molding to yours as if he couldn't get close enough.

He broke the kiss for a brief moment, his breathing ragged and his eyes dark with desire. He captured your lips again, his tongue seeking entry into your mouth as his hands roamed under your shirt, exploring the bare skin of your waist.

That was until the sound of someone talking from nearby that made the both of you snap out of the moment. John's attention snapped away from you for a brief moment, his eyes darting towards the source of the noise.

He then took a step back, creating a small space between you now. Both of you were breathing heavily, trying to catch your breaths after the intense moment you had just shared. Surprisingly you were the first to speak up.

"I... I didn't mean to avoid you... I was just scared of these feelings I felt around you... I thought ignoring it— ignoring you was the better idea" You said. After all, you weren't ever good at understanding your emotions.

John watched you, taking in the mixture of emotions that played across your face. He knew exactly what you were feeling because he knew what that feeling was. He took a step closer to you again, his expression now more serious.

"Sometimes we can't control how we feel, darlin'. And trust me, ain't nothing wrong with what we just did" He said, gently caressing the side of your face.

"... I'm fucking scared John... in this life I'm used to losing people, if I let myself feel things then I don't think I'll be able to survive the thought of losing you" You said, the fear in your confession made John frown a bit but there was this sweetness in his gaze when he cupped your face to look at him.

"I ain't going anywhere, darlin'. You ain't gonna lose me, I promise you that"

"You can't be sure" You said, your hands rested on top of his.

"You're right, I can't guarantee anything in this life... but I can promise you I'll do everything in my power to stay by your side. I ain't leaving you, no matter what. You got my word on that" He said, his eyes never leaving yours. You stared at him for a while before resting your head on his chest.

"God I hate you" You sighed but your lips formed a small smile. Seeing that, John couldn't help but chuckled, a warm, genuine smile spreading across his face as he wrapped his arms around you.

"You don't hate me. You can't stand me, though, I know that. But you definitely don't hate me. Otherwise, you wouldn't be leaning on me like this" He teased.

"Stop pushing your luck"

"Oh, come on, darlin'. You know you love me really" he said continuing his tease with a smirk on his face.

"Ugh..." You groaned and it had John chuckled again, enjoying the playful banter between the two of you. He tightened his arms around you while holding you close to him, his face nuzzling into your hair and his voice lowering to a husky, teasing tone.

"You don't have to admit it right now... but I know you do..."

[phasewashere]

anyways. john being the favored son actually makes me insane because. arthur was dutchs golden boy. his pride and his joy. arthur was obedient and good and never argued against his father until the end. the perfect son. john was his son. the way arthur describes his relationship with dutch versus with hosea. how hosea is more human. because hosea does not treat arthur the way dutch does. the way hosea loves arthur but not in the way dutch does. dutch puts him on a pedestal. hes dutchs boy. his prize pony. HIS beloved son. to hosea arthur is just his son. he loves arthur. but arthur is his own man and hosea understands this. its the way dutch sees arthur as a an extention of himself. a symbol of his prowess (even though he still loves him its just. fucked up). hosea sees him as a person. hosea is arthurs father and arthur is his son.

john and dutch emulate the way hosea and arthur act. to me. john and dutch are father and son and john is dutchs spitting image. flaws included. dutch loves him as much as he hates him because he sees himself in john.

he loves it as much as he fears it.

[krazykit]

lowkey want john marston and arthur morgan to tagteam me. even if john is musty and hasn't bathed in months idc i need either his or arthur's fat cock inside of me

[burdock-root]

John gets dragged for looking smelly and greasy, but he’s the only one of these mfers i see wash themselves

[givemebackmypills]

[river-of-wine]

I’ve been playing Red Dead Redemption and I am enthralled by every aspect of this guy

[fablexdreams]

The amount of people who think that the Strange Man is talking about Arthur when he says to John, "You've forgotten far more important people than me," will never not astound me. Yall really think John could possibly ever forget Arthur? Arthur? The man he grew up with? Who taught him? Who cared for him? Who helped raise him? Who saved him multiple times? His brother? The same John who could not rest until Micah Bell was dead because he couldn't let go of his pain and anger over how Arthur died? The same John who still wore Arthur's satchel and kept his hat and wrote in his journal? That John? Little Johnny Marston? Please be serious. Arthur haunted John's dreams and thoughts until the very day he died in front of that damn barn, and you can not convince me otherwise. If he remembers Dutch, Bill, and Javier, I promise you he sure as shit would remember Arthur lmfao.

[arthursfuckinghat]

Pouring Forth Oil IV - Chapter II