#i love watching live coverage of insane shit

[very-uncorrect]

I need something similar to Oceangate and/or Luigi Mangione to happen like every single week because shit like this is so damn entertaining

[kaibutsushidousha]

Kodaka April Fools tweets 2024

Lying just because it's April Fools' is so dull. Honestly painful to watch. Lying in general doesn't do you any good. In my younger days, I told every lie I could, saying some genuinely insane stuff about being a supreme leader of evil and whatnot, and thanks to that, now that I'm in my thirties, I got famous for all the wrong reasons and can't find a stable job because people think I'm associated with the yakuza... Sigh, I wanna deck my cringe younger self's face. Quit lying for fun while you can.

My classmates aren't doing great either. Thinking you're hot shit during your school days always comes back to bite you... My advice to my past self: slow and steady effort is worth more than any talent. Also, the part of life you spent larping with that silly horse laugh is not going to be one you'll want to remember later. I wish I could make that clear to him. White lies aren't a thing. Talent is never enough. My class is proof of that. Wanna know what my classmates are like now that we're in our thirties?

Akamatsu became a piano teacher. Her player skills capped off in her teens, it seems. But she's not that good at teaching so she's considered kinda mid at her job. And now she's struggling with the father of a student incessantly hitting on her. Tough world to live in.

Toujou opened a housekeeping company but she was too strict with her employees so everyone quit. And now she's doing everything on her own. Sucks to be in your thirties without any successors or employees. She's a prime example of how being so much better than anyone else doesn't do you any good. Well, she's always working for celebrities, so she's doing well financially, but I heard about some major court fight about a missing item under suspicion of theft from one of her clients. That can't be nice.

Yumeno got to her thirties still saying magic is real, so she's past the point of no return. She agrees that's an unhinged way to live, but she's too old to suddenly change gimmicks. Work takes her all over the country, but her gimmick doesn't allow her to publicly drink, so she has to get plastered alone in her hotel room after shows. I wish she could fix her life with real magic.

Harukawa? ...Haven't heard that name in a long time. Now she was a living edgy fantasy. The past tense was because I hadn't heard of her in a long time. I don't know the details, but apparently, she went to some war zone outside of Japan because her first love didn't want to date her. Takes some real edgelord to react to a broken heart like that, but if she's still alive, I have no idea how her thirties are treating her. My personal guess is that she's a mother of many.

Chabashira opened her Aikido school but is having a hard time attracting students. So she had the idea of starting an anti-sexual-harassment campaign that could double as advertisement, but thanks to her cluelessness when it comes to romance, she got canceled for mistakenly tossing men in regular couples. She's still doing the "degenerate males" bit in her thirties. Girl really needs to get on with the times. Rumor goes that she still downs huge packs of tequila bottles with Yumeno every now and then. Really don't think there's any salvaging her reputation.

Shirogane is an office lady still continuing her cosplay hobby on the side. She could be doing well if she knew how to keep her mouth shut but frequently rambles about cosplay history and etiquette, so no one likes having her around. Stay emotionally dependent on a single hobby long enough and your passion starts to close you off to others. That's her problem.

Angie was the most successful in the class! She made big money both on the art and the religion fronts. However, there were some controversies about her devotees selling counterfeits of her paintings at exorbitant prices and one magazine made a huge news coverage of it, which resulted in her catching the police's attention. She's been recently untraceable, with the rumors saying that she'll never be back to Japan.

Oh, and Iruma... Up until some point, she had the best life of all of us. She made big money off of her inventions' patents. So far so good. Things only started going off-rails after she married an ex-stripper. The two started a YouTube channel together. And later, her husband ran in last year's elections and lost big time. They got an awful debt from his election campaign and she had to get into side jobs to pay it off. And her husband? Disappeared. No word from Iruma herself about what happened. Tough world to live in.

No further updates from Kodaka in the past 3 hours, so I assume he went to sleep and will come back to tweet about the 7 remaining boys in the morning.

[allthefoolmine]

The 2024 Men's Olympic Marathon Was Epic

Excuse me for some screaming about the 2024 Paris Olympic Men's Marathon, okay?

Cool. Under the cut 'cause this is gonna get long and enthusiastic.

So, first of all, Kenenisa Bekele, the man the myth the legend, was back at the Olympics. After twelve years. After he very nearly won the 2024 London Marathon. I was there and seated for this.

For second, I immediately developed a massive mancrush on Yaseen Abdallah. He's 22. He represents Sudan. He just graduated from college. He--get this--had never run a marathon before. (He was in the race on one of the Olympic universality places.) And said about running, "I hate hills".

let's all take a moment to remind ourselves of the brutally hilly Paris Olympic marathon course, yes? Yes.

And finally, Bat-Ochiryn Ser-Od was running his sixth Olympic marathon, which is makes my brain bleed to even think about.

I was too cheap to pay for a livestream, plus, from everything I've read, live television coverage of championship marathons is usually pretty shit. (Especially if there are men's and women's races happening at the same time. But feminist outrage about how fukkin' horrible TV coverage of women's long distance racing is, is not the point of this post.) I was following the race via the Olympic webpage, which gives 5k splits, and various major newspapers live updates. I should also say that I'm a pretty new fan of the sport and not at all a competitive runner myself, so, take all of this for what it's worth.

That marathon was ridiculous. Reasons include:

Eyob Faniel (Italy): made what seemed like a serious effort to take charge in the first half of the race. Boy did he pay for it later. But how exciting to see someone go for it.

By the end of the first half, it looked like Tamirat Tola (Ethiopia) had been like, "I'll take it from here" and seeing him win, in an Olympic record, on THAT COURSE, in those weather and humidity conditions, was frankly fucking bonkers. Like, run do not walk to watch the Eurosports coverage of the last ten minutes of the race, because the beauty and economy of that man's stride belongs in a museum.

The performance of Akira Akasaki (Japan). Bro is 26, this was his first Olympics and world championship race. He stayed in fifth place almost the entire freaking race, even with the Faniel-led craziness in the first half, and only ended up sixth when he got passed at the very end. You can see his finish in the clip above, and I implore you to watch it. Dude looks so flipping' happy, and from what I could see on the live tracker, you could set a metronome or an atomic clock by his pacing. And you can see from the video of the last ten minutes--he's running alone! There's no one with him! Again, as far as I can tell this was his first race at this level of competition. Absolute insanity. I can't wait to see what he does in the future.

Bashir Abdi got silver! After his bronze in Tokyo! What a legend. Also, Benson Kipruto was third. Both, from the live tracker, seem to have run incredible, smart races, especially in the second half.

Emil Cairess, (a Yorkshireman! Whoo!) who went from 9th at the half, to 2nd at 30k, to 6th at 35k and 40k, and finished fourth. I bet his race was epic to witness live. (And his finish is hilarious, dude looks like he left it allllll on the ice. Love to see it.)

Seeing somebody set a National Record is always exciting; seeing someone do it in heat, humidity, and hills, and come seventh in the Olympic marathon, is even cooler. Give Tebello Ramakongoana (Lesotho) all the flowers.

In the battle of Connor Mantz (USA) vs the Hurt Locker (dude looks like he went with Faniel and paid for it), the judges award Mantz the victory. He hung on for eighth.

Yaseen Abdallah, hater of hills, finished his first marathon, in 2:11 for 33rd place, setting a new national record for Sudan. My head exploded. If he ever decides to run another marathon, dude has a bright future.

Kenenisa Bekele had a rough day at the office but he finished! I was hoping to see him medal, because I'm a huge fan of his, but seeing him grind to finish 39th is inspiring. Massive respect to him. Eliud Kipchoge sadly DNF'd, and I hope he is okay.

And in last place, Bat-Ochiryn Ser-Od, finished his sixth Olympic marathon, which he was determined to do after dropping out in Tokyo. Ridiculous.

And that was the men's Olympic marathon. Bonkers from beginning to end. Cannot wait to follow the women's race tomorrow!

Last ten minutes of the race:

[swimmingdreamcycle]

This is an insane design, who would make a system like this for a CAR, am I misunderstanding what this is saying? I find it hard to believe that a company like Tesla is actually going to design something like this that functions as intended, imagine trying to modify a harness like this by installing something simple like heated seats and the entire fucking truck breaks, I don't give a shit about functionality when the entire vehicle is designed to fail after doing something like a car wash! What about in the case of a crash? You're talking about sending possibly up to 92 volts through these systems in a collision, that'll get those computers, microcontrollers and switches real nice and toasty, I can easily believe that these things are going to be gigantic liability risk billboards in even the tiniest of collisions, oh hooray a car that insurance won't cover when it's involved in any collision regardless of the size. I can't wait for the shit storms of trashed cyber trucks sitting in dealer lots, eventually they won't be able to get the new ones off the lots and they'll have to release a "new and improved version" every few years, ah capitalism the literal definition of "turn a product into a lifestyle, and then watch the money start-a flowing". I love the modern age, its almost like all those sci-fi movies and shows from the 70's somehow predicted these things would happen, oh wait they were judging the current events of their time and predicting how the future would look, and let me tell you, this shit is getting too fucking real for me. Sure the car only lasts two years "but it can dance" its literally the Apple company sickness seeping into other markets, it is truly terrifying to watch several billionaires take over vast coverages of markets so quickly, steamrolling the smaller businesses in the process all the while self-employment is all but wiped out and all the sub-billionare companies are taken over and everything becomes a corporate controlled corrupt government puppet state where free will is annihilated in favor "of maximizing profits" . This is what the world is turning into, and I'm in the generation that is going to have to live through it, I hate baby boomers

[krreader]

ensorcell | chapter 8.

pairing: prince!taehyung x reader  fandom: bts warnings: non idol!au ; prince!taehyung ;  arranged marriage ; language ; sex  genre: fluff ; angst ; smut word count: 2.7k+ previous: 1 ; 2 ; 3 ; 4 ; 5 ; 6 ; 7

summary: it was funny, how meeting one single person could change your life forever. you were ordinary, he was not. he was rich, you were not. he fell in love with you and so did you. even though he was never supposed to.

a/n: i’m so sad I never get to update my originals as much as I want to, but I’m really happy when I do. especially with this one BECAUSE IT’S FINALLY SEXY TIME

It was on days like these that you were harshly reminded of not really belonging here.

It was on days like these that you realized that the girl struggling in college to get her degree and having frequent anxiety attacks due to the uncertainty of the future was the real you that you had left behind to play pretend. Because unlike some others, you were not cut out to play this game of royal intrigues that some seemed to excel in.

“You're mad.. aren't you?” the familiar voice would have made you turn around and smile a few hours ago, but now you kept your eyes firmly on the horizon and watched the sun set in the royal gardens while royal guards and maids were all around you, making sure that you were well taken care of.

Why, you might ask? Well, because they all thought you were carrying a royal heir, thanks to the man that now sat down next to you. When in reality, the only thing you were carrying was the weight of the lies that kept piling up.

“I'm not mad. I know why you did it,” when Taehyung let out a relieved sigh, you quickly added, “Doesn't mean I like what you did, though.”

“I had to say something. I've gotten so many inquiries about whether the rumors about Dae and me were true today, I knew the only way to make it stop was to say you were pregnant. A royal heir is the most precious thing a kingdom could have. You being pregnant will put an indefinite end to any possible other 'proposals' that my father could make.”

“But I'm not, Taehyung. I'm not pregnant. And I don't intend to get pregnant. Because in case you forgot, we've only been dating for a few weeks. Marrying is a big step after such a short amount of time, but having a baby?”

“I know,” he put his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands, brushing them over his tired eyes in desperation, “I thought it was the best solution at the time. I should have discussed it with you first, I'm sorry.”

It was a mess. A mess that would be hard to get out of, but at the same time, you really couldn't bring yourself to be angry with him. His father would have married him off to someone that he hated. He did it to ensure that the two of you could stay with each other. In some way, it showed you that he did it because, like his sister said, you meant a lot to him. And from the way he was acting now, a child hadn't been something that he had considered so early on either.

So at least you were on the same page in that sense.

Now, you'd have to figure out how to fix this and get out of this without birthing a baby in nine months. It’s not like you already had enough shit on your plate already.

“Give me a second,” you said when you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket, letting out a heavy sigh when you saw the name on the display. You already knew you were in deep shit when you answered, “Let me explain..-”

“No, you let me talk now and you just listen,” your mother started angrily, “You run off with some foreign prince that I've never met in my life without so much as a word to get married to him, because there is no other way to stay together, despite you and him only knowing each other for a few hours. Then you get knocked up by said prince before even getting married to him and are now pregnant without even having finished college yet and having absolutely zero fucking stability in your life while being in a country that is not home. Did I get all the details right?”

You clenched your jaw as you looked at the terrified 'foreign prince' that your mother seemed to like so much. Taehyung maybe should have asked more about your family, now that he was hearing her scream like this.

“I'm not pregnant, mom,” you lowered your voice, “It's.. extremely complicated and I promise I will explain it all eventually, but I am not pregnant, okay?”

“You know what? I've had enough. I'm taking the next flight out and I am taking you home with me.”

That alarmed Taehyung so much that he sat up straight, but you just put your hand on his leg to stop him from worrying, “I'm not five anymore, mom, you can't just come and get me. I'm an adult who can make her own decisions and I've made this one. I am getting married, with or without your approval.”

You knew that she was worried. That her saying that wasn't said out of any ill-will, but she was worried sick for you being here, so far away from home where she couldn't be with you.

And she instantly showed that side of herself when her voice broke a little, “Just come home, sweetheart. We can figure all of this out when you're back here. And maybe your boyfriend could come here too? Why can't he just..-”

If only it were so easy.

“Mom,” you got up and started walking, wanting a moment alone with your mother, “I miss you as much as you miss me, so I'm going to suggest that maybe, if you can, come here and spend a few days here. I actually would really like you to be here for the wedding. I want you to meet Taehyung and see what a great guy he is and his mother and sister, who take such good care of me. I want you to meet them.”

“It's not them I'm worried about. It's everything else. You don't understand how big of a thing this is, the media coverage on all of this is insane. Everyone is suddenly talking so much about you and I'm so afraid of what it's turning you into. I just don't want anything to happen to you, so leaving now..-”

“..- is not an option, I'm sorry, mom,” you said firmly, but at the same time, with a soft undertone, “Call (Y/B/F). She'll be here soon, maybe you can take the same flight as her. I'll prove to you that I'm doing okay and that you won't have to worry about me. I've got this.”

Fake it till you make it, right?

“How could you be so stupid?!” the king was pacing up and down the room, the queen and Taehyung's brother and sister all sitting across from you and him on a couch opposite, “I told you, the worst thing that you could do is get her pregnant and you do exactly that. This is an outrage!”

“Have you even listened to the news? Read an article? Because everything I've seen so far is well-wishes and happiness,” Taehyung leaned back and crossed one leg over the other, “We live in the 21st Century, father. Having a child before marriage isn't as big of a deal anymore as when you were younger.”

He was challenging him, so much that his mother had to gently shake her head to tell him to stop.

The king was already furious enough. Taehyung shouldn't add more fuel to the fire.

You had thought that Taehyung might have told his father the truth about the situation, but that would make little sense. What he did was to stop him from trying to ruin yours and his relationship. If he caught wind of this pregnancy being fake, it would be back to him trying to marry Taehyung off to princess Dae. His mother seemed to be unaware of the situation as well. Only his sister knew, why she did, though, you didn't know. Maybe Taehyung had confided in her beforehand.

“I thought I had raised you well, you know?” gone was the mad king, now all that you could see on his face was disappointment, “But ever since you met her..-” and as soon as your eyes met his, it was back to anger, “..you ruined everything.”

Taehyung let out a snort and got up, “If that's everything you have to say, then we shall take our leave. My fiancé has to rest,” he emphasized the word fiancé, which only seemed to make his father angrier.

But before this could escalate any further, he pulled you up by your hand and out of the room, walking with you to your bedroom.

And as soon as the doors behind you two were closed, his shoulders slumped and you could see just how tired he actually was.

You weren't the only one that was drained by all of this, he just hid it better than you.

Taehyung moved to the bed, then sat down on the foot of it and closed his eyes for a moment.

You watched him, but couldn't do so for long. Your need to reach out and support him was too great. And so you followed him and knelt down before him, gently cupping his face in your hands so that he looked at you.

“This is all my fault,” he whispered, “I made it worse.”

“Why did you do it? I mean.. really, why did you take such a drastic step?”

He looked into your eyes for a long while, then he put his hands over yours to hold them, his eyes becoming sadder by the second, “I was scared to lose you. The only one that I ever had feelings for and that I wanted to spend my future with. That was selfish, wasn't it?”

The corner of your mouth curled into a smile, “I wouldn't be here anymore if I didn't feel the same way about you.”

And the longer this eye contact lasted, the harder your heart beat against your chest. So much, that it felt like it was about to jump out. The urge to kiss him, to hold him and just... be with him, was so overwhelming that you couldn't hold back anymore.

And for the first time since you came here, it felt like you shut off your brain and just listened to your heart. You leaned up and kissed him, carefully at first because you were afraid of taking it too far, but Taehyung was as desperate for this as you were.

This wasn't even about sexual needs, this was about feeling the other person so close to you, to feel a union that would bring you closer together and would help you feel a little better in a shitty situation like this.

He wanted that too... so he deepened the kiss.

You sighed against his lips and slowly got up, only so you could straddle him a moment later.

His hands traveled from yours to your waist, holding you so tightly that you felt like his hands were leaving marks on your skin.

Keep in mind that you haven't had a proper moment like this since that first kiss that you shared back home. All those emotions, those feelings... you both just bottled them up because you had no other choice. But now, the bottle was overflowing. And there was no going back anymore.

Taehyung fell back into the mattress, you with him, without ever breaking the kiss once.

The only moment you both did, was for you and him to take off your shirts, then it was back to exploring the others mouth.

Fingertips running over your back, a trail of goosebumps forming where they touched and once he unclasped your bra, your entire upper body was covered in them.

One of his hands came up to your neck to hold it firmly, his thumb brushing against your jaw, stopping to kiss you for a moment, but leaning his forehead against yours and breathing heavily.

You thought he might say something, but he couldn't. It was all too much in that moment. Too many feelings and emotions. All he could do was quickly turn you around so that you were lying on your back and he on top of you.

His lips found their way to your neck, beginning to kiss every single spot on it.

Your hands were running through his beautiful and soft hair, letting out quiet moans every time he found a spot that made you shiver.

It was clear that he wanted to make you feel good. As if he wanted to make up for something, which he really didn't have to. But as his lips wrapped around your nipples, you couldn't bring yourself to say no. Not when his tongue felt so good and felt even better when it was finally between your exposed legs.

You had only been able to imagine what kind of lover he was before, but you were glad to see that – despite not knowing his sexual history – he seemed to know what he was doing. His tongue was caressing your clit, kissing it and biting down on it every now and again. Every time your moans became louder, he slowed down, just so you could fully enjoy this and he could draw this out for as long as possible.

He didn't say a word, just enjoyed making you feel beautiful, loved and outright good. 

Soft kisses, hard kisses, sucking on it.. he drove you mad relatively quickly.

“I think..- I think I'm..-” you couldn't finish this sentence, Taehyung had already felt your grip tighten in his hair. He licked on your clit like he had before and to top it all of, sucked on it a little harder than he had earlier. And that was all it took to bring you over the edge and to have you moan out his name. Loud.

Your body became limp afterwards, breathing heavily as he kissed his way back up.

A grin had spread on his face, kissing your cheek when he whispered, “I should thank whoever built this castle for making the walls thick.”

You let out a chuckle and spread your legs a little wider, grinning when he looked down, “You're not done, though, right?”

“Right..-” he dipped his head to kiss you once, twice, then he leaned down to your ear, his hardened length now resting against your throbbing clit, “Are you sure?”

Butterflies erupted in your belly when he said that. This caring and wonderful man, still worried if you maybe didn't want to continue after all this... it might have been stupid to think that way, but in that moment, you thought to yourself: ‘It's all worth it...’

“Yes,” you wrapped your arms around his neck, “I want you. All of you.”

“You have me,” he whispered back, slipping inside you so easily because of how wet you were, “All of me.”

You had seen his dick earlier and had seen that it was long, but now that he was actually inside you, rock-hard at that, you could really feel just how long.

The moment he was completely buried in you, you let out a breath that you had unconsciously been holding and waited for him to continue.

But it took him a while.

He just waited, held you in his arms and kissed your cheek every now and again. 

“Hey.. are you okay?” you asked eventually, putting your hand on his cheek to make him look at you.

And when he did, you were surprised to see tears in his eyes. Worry filled your face, but he quickly laughed, “Shit, I'm sorry. I'm just... I just really needed this.”

“My vagina?” you said, mainly to lighten the mood. And it did.

Taehyung let out a laugh and kissed your forehead, “No.. happiness. A moment of peace. With the woman that I'll marry.”

Your smile softened, your thumb brushing over his cheek, “Well then.. why don't you show your wife-to-be what she can expect from her future husband?”

“Many,” he pulled out a little, “many,” then pushed back in, a little harder than the first time to make you moan, “Orgasms.”

Now, that was music to your ears.

And the moans that escaped his throat afterwards as he continued pushing himself inside you again and again were an even sweeter melody. Every time he moaned your name and told you how good you felt, your heart felt like it was exploding.

This is what you had both needed.

Because now, there was no uncertainty anymore.

This was right. This felt right. You and him together.

And whatever obstacle would come your way, you would face it.

Together.

[justjessame]

Starting Over Chapter 38

Bucky wouldn’t tell me just who he had in mind for me to talk over my mental trauma with, at least not in the shed in the dark.  Once he was content with the security of the shed, we let ourselves in the house through the backdoor.  His cell chirped and he groaned.

“What is it?”  I was opening the fridge to grab water, thinking if we were heading for a long conversation I wanted to be hydrated.  

“I had Chris,” grinning at how easily he found a fit inside my group of insane friends. “Help me out with an app and -” he sighed.  “I want to sit here and talk things over with you, but -”

“Work calls?”  I shook my head and moved closer to him.  “It’s ok,” I looked up at him and smiled.  “You are a HERO, Bucky Barnes, and when you have to go - you have to go.”  

He pulled me into his arms for a kiss, long and lingering.  “Do me a favor?”  I had to tilt my head back to look up at him, but when I did I nodded.  “Don’t watch the news, please?”  

“I won’t.”  It was an easy promise to make.  I didn’t want to be a nervous wreck while Bucky went full Avenger.  “Go suit up,” he shook his head and kissed me again.  “I’m serious,” I murmured when he pulled back.  “If you don’t, can you imagine the shit Sam is gonna give you?”  

He groaned and pulled away.  “Fine.”  I moved into the living room, turning on the lights as I went.  No news, but I thought I could put on a movie - stream something that way no “BREAKING NEWS” could break in and stop my heart.  I heard him coming down the stairs and grinned when he came in to say goodbye.  “Damn,” my mouth went dry seeing him in his suit.  

“Don’t give me that look, Brooke.”  It came out stern and damned if that didn’t make me even hotter.  “And don’t bite your lip like that.”  Fuck.  He shook his head and kissed my forehead.  “I can’t kiss you goodbye, if I do -” He groaned and pulled away.  “I have to go.”  

I nodded, hoping like hell that this wouldn’t be another pineapple situation.  “Be safe?”  It came out breathless and husky.  And instead of leaving he came back and kissed me even more breathless.  “I thought you said -”

“Leaving without kissing you would be a crime.”  His eyes were on mine and his hand was cupping my cheek.  “I love you.”

“I love you.”  He was smiling when he finally pulled away, and then with a quiet goodbye he was gone.  

I did as promised, I didn’t watch the news.  I didn’t have to.  Not with the updates I got from Connie and my other well meaning friends.  Updates about Bucky going to the GRC meeting and how all hell had broken loose when the terrorist organization known as “The Flag Smashers” had shown up.  I heard about motorcycles and explosions- hostages and rescues - Sam flying in and finally showing himself as the Captain America that Steve, and though he’d banter against it, Bucky expected him to be.  I missed the speech, I missed the coverage, but I got the highlights.  

I waited and waited.  I stared at my cell phone, so quick to chirp with texts from everyone who I cared about, BUT the one person I MOST wanted to hear from.  I paced.  I drank copious amounts of water.  I went to the bathroom thanks to drinking copious amounts of water.  I paced some more.  

It was late, or early, when I finally heard his key in the lock.  And another voice with his - a feminine voice.  

I peeked around the entry of the livingroom to see a blonde woman, who looked vaguely familiar, leaning against him.  She was murmuring to him, clutching against his chest, and I felt a rush of pain - as if I were witnessing something intimate, but then he looked up and smiled at me. 

“Brooke, you stayed up,” Bucky eased the woman, closer.  “This is Sharon Carter,” oh, the name sparked why she’d looked so familiar.  “She’s had a bit of an -”

“I was shot,” she blurted out. “I’m fine,” I looked into her face and realized she WAS fine, and high as hell on pain meds.  “They patched me right up at the ER.”  

I bit my lip to keep from chuckling, laughing at a woman who had been shot would be a terrible thing, but Bucky’s eyes were twinking when they met mine.  “She needs a place to rest for the night.”  I nodded and considered our options.  “I don’t think she can make the stairs.”  

“There’s a half bath down here,” I opened the hallway bathroom door and flipped on the lightswitch.  “There’s a spare toothbrush and some toothpaste in the drawer.”  I told her, even though I wasn’t sure she was making sense out of my words.  “I’ll grab some blankets and a pillow from the linen closet and make up the couch -”

“I’ll do that,” Bucky offered, tilting his head toward his burden.  “I think Sharon might prefer YOUR help over mine with any personal things.”  

“Smooth, Barnes, real smooth,” Sharon snickered and I joined her.  High or not, she had a point.  “I could use a change of clothes, if you could spare something?”  

“No problem,” I told Bucky where to grab something and helped Sharon into the half bath.  “It’s not really much, but it’ll get you clean enough.”  

“They told me he found someone,” she was trying to focus on my face, while I helped her sit on the closed toilet seat.  “You’re not freaked out by ALL of it?”  

I shook my head and considered where to start with helping her.  “Bucky is amazing,” I smiled when he knocked on the door and handed me what I’d asked for through the slimmest crack he could manage.  “He makes me happy.”  

Sharon nodded, and held up her arms like I imagined Bryn would and I couldn’t hold back my laughter anymore.  Helping her get ready for bed on the sofa that Bucky made up, I wondered why it was so much easier to explain how I felt about him to his side of the equation than to mine?  

Sharon was easy to get settled once we got her changed out of her ruined clothes.  Then Bucky and I, tired beyond belief, went upstairs.  I turned on the shower, because while soaking in a hot tub with him sounded like heaven - I wasn’t sure we’d stay awake. 

A shared shower, that was for actual washing and nothing more, and then we were in our bed, curled together in our night clothes.  His arms wrapped around me, his breath warm against my cheek.  

“You never told me,” I was fighting the pull, the drag into the nightmares.  “Who?”

“Who?” He was fighting his own pull, exhausted from battle and heroism, and yet I wanted to know.  

“Who do you think I should talk to?”  It came out in a yawn, but I wanted to know - did I have hope?

“Ah,” he snuggled deeper into our bed and into my warmth.  “He’s one of the BIG THREE if you ask Sam.” Bucky chuckled and I sighed into his warmth.  “Dr. Strange, Brooke, he’s - well, I don’t completely understand everything he talks about, but I think he might have answers that you need.”  

“Dr. Strange?”  I couldn’t fight the pull anymore, and neither could Bucky, I felt his sigh and the brush of his lips against my temple, but then the flashes and the pain. 

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 30+31.12.20 lbs

30.12.20

lmao ep starts off itself with vansh and kabir ka staring match.

vansh steady in first place, not having blinked for................ like 3 minutes now? this dude a fucking freak.

while riddhima gazes adoringly at him thinking bhagwaan ne mujhe itnaaaaaaaaaa achcha pati diya hai. pft. idk what the hell sins you did in your last life riddhima, to get a husband like this one in this life, but it had to be something reallllllllllll bad. like stealing from little orphans and kicking puppies or some shit.

thankfully dadi is here to put an end to this chutiyaapa.

countdown blah blah, no1 currrrrrrrrr.

itna pheeeeeeeeeenka happy new year. bhai-behen ho kya???

now we talking.

he just says some trite shit like new kahaani that will be remembered for ages blah blah and gives creepy looks. dude why can’t you be normal on oneeeee bloody day?

ahaana also giving random creepy looks seeing vansh/riddhima hugging. and she goes and............

i think i watch this show and rrahul a little too closely ki i instantly knew this isn’t his hand and thus it’s not vansh’s hand she’s holding.

yupppppppppp. bola tha na.

damn they make a hotass couple of shady bitches.

ok wow i’m really feeling it. wish kabir wasn’t a sociopath who is incapable of feeling attachment (“love” is too strong a word) for anyone but his mother.

lmao his reaction when ahaana tells him ki riddhima didn’t believe any of the pattiii she padaofied her about vansh.

ok but how do these two know each other??? matlab yeh le aaya hai issko? i thought vansh le aaya hoga?!!?

mereko kya kaunsa manhoos le aaya? i’m just here for the attractive ppl pressing their bodies up against each other. keep on keeping on, #KaHana

he’s warning her against ever double-crossing him and dude the angry/hate-sex vibes here are *~~~ExQuISiTe*~~~~

the way she’s confidently gazing at him all sexy tells me she’s a much more seasoned player than riddhima and i already love her more than the damn lead of the show.

damn. that’s a gnarly period you got riddhima. that’s an unusual amount of flow. go see a doctor about it, sis.

i’ve heard about ppl making art with menstrual blood and all, but this is fucking ridiculous.

anyway of course the dumbass goes investigating it. and got fucking attacked in the storeroom and SOMEONE HUNG HER UP. LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THIS MESSED UP HOUSE DUDE????/ WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU STILLL LIVE HERE????

Chehra Appreciation Break

asadkjasldjlaskdjlsakjdlas the way he’s yelling for everyone and interrogating them of their whereabouts coz riddhima’s missing.

lmao ishani and ahaana’s reactions at this temper tantrum are fucking amazing.

dang what’s with the suuuuuper orange lower half of his face???? ugh. the foundation woes are back now that the beard’s growing back in.

anyway he went barrelling off to find her after some more chabaaya hua dhamkis at his fam. ahaana already regretting moving into this pagaal khaana.

this scene is so fucking disturbing to watch that i don’t even wanna fucking cap it. but she was legit getting HANGED and he managed to get there in the nick of time and save her.

how, you ask? BY SHOOTING AT THE ROPE, INSTEAD OF JUST.......... DOING SOMETHING NORMAL LIKE RUNNING AND PUTTING THE STOOL BACK UNDER HER FEET TO STABILIZE HER. THIS SHOW IS JUST FUCKING BATSHIT INSANE, MY LORD.

this poor girl, my god. i don’t think i’ve ever watched a tellywood FL be tortured to the extent that this one is on a daily basis. it’s fucking ridiculous. there’s no redemption for any of the raisinghanias at this point. she just needs to fucking leave (and file several domestic violence cases against each and every one of them, except dadi.)

anyway she tells him whatever went down today, starting from the period blood fiasco onwards and he’s........ vibrating in anger. cool i guess.

some promises and shit about how who ever did this will pay, time for “humaara khel” and .......... dude. you say this shit every single time. and nothing changes. i don’t give a fuck anymore about your stupid promises. move the fuck outta this hellhole with your wife if you really mean it.

seedha jaake ahaana ke sar pe bandook taan di. based on what evidence? only the Good Lord above knows, coz vansh and the writers sure don’t.

no literally based on what is he accusing her and pulling the trigger??????? idgi??????

almost shot her and is saying “riddhima pe kharonchh nahi aani chahiye, baat ishq aur vishwaas ki hai” and ahaana is giggling and literally what the fuck is going on i’m so confused.

ahaana saying wowwwww, you want revenge also, and she shouldn’t get hurt also.

MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!! I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE’S THE ONE WHO BROUGHT AHAANA IN!!!!!!!!!!!!

literally what the fuck is this dude on???? badla chahiye, par dard nahi hona chahiye. bhai, kya phoonk ke aaye ho, humein bhi toh thoda de do.

ok this is tooooo fucking convoluted a game. riddhima thinks kabir is the one attacking her. but it’s kabir + ahaana. kabir thinks ahaana is on his side and brought her into VR mansion, but ahaana is double agent who was actually planted in kabir’s nazar by vansh to fuck over BOTH kabir and riddhima. i think?????????

ahaana be like re devaaaaaa, what fucking madness have i gotten myself into????????????? the things i have to do for health insurance coverage during a pandemic.

———————————————————————

31.12.20

first 5 minutes is some new year ka naach gaana bs. fwding.

ok this fucker is a legit motherflipping crazy. he just wants to keep torturing riddhima for god knows how long.

even ahaana is alarmed.

did he do absolutely noooooo research after the cliff chhalaang? like....... this revenge shit is so dumb at this point, when he knows she brought in vihaan to stop kabir from ruining the family, and took a second fucking bullet for him?!?!?!?!?!?! they shouldn’t have written the second gunshot plot point, coz now he looks like a reallllllllll unappreciative fucker for whom literally no good deed is enough.

WHAT PYAAR AND VISHWAAS, FUCKER???????? LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?????? YOU’VE PLAYED THESE GAMES WITH HER FROM THE VERY START OF YOUR MARRIAGE AND MAYBE TOOK A BREAK FOR A WEEK OR TWO IN BETWEEN - WHEN SHE GOT SHOT THE FIRST TIME AND DURING ISHANI’S WEDDING. THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT??????/ LIKE.......... THIS MAKES NO BLOODY SENSE. THIS CHARACTER IS JUST SUCH A SUPREME DOUCHEBAG, MY GOD. THERE’S ABSOLUTELY NO REDEEMING HIM WHATSOEVER.

also can’t say rrahul’s extra chabaaaaa chabaaaaaaa ke bolna is making this enjoyable to watch at all.

all i wanna know is what ahaana has on him that he’s indebted to her and thought her worthy enough to join forces with. SPILL SPILL SPILL SPILL!!!!!!!!!!!! what does ahaana get outta all this?!!?!?!!!!!!

riddhima on the other hand running around wondering whom vansh is gonna murder. SIS YOU JUST GOT STRANGULATED CAN YOU SIT DOWN FOR A HOT SEC AND REST?!?!!?!?

ahaana is like bro you gonna ruin riddhima’s life, and he’s like yeah, that’s what i want. jesus christ, dude. just divorce her then. why prolong this shit out like this????? truly psychopathic.

riddhima hears his voice and heads to the pool area..........

............. isn’t that his shoulder there behind the tree? is she fucking blind???????? HOW CAN SHE NOT SEE HIS 7 FOOT TALL HULKING ASS BEHIND THAT PATLA SA JHAADI?????? HE’S LITERALLY THERE LIKE........

........... she left. god. she’s really really REALLY stupid. like pretty sure these crimes against her count as extraaaaaaaaa bad....... like, pick on someone with your own brain capacity, vansh? leave the simple minded sis alone!

the only gift that’s acceptable from you rn sir, is divorce papers. and a self-filed restraining order promising to stay 3 whole districts away.

yikes, that beard is notttttt growing in well.

“tum mujhe apne saare stress de do.” BITCH YOU’RE HER BIGGEST STRESS. ASSHOLE. I HATE YOU SO MUCH.

“tumse door jaake jaaonga kahaan? abhi toh bohut kuch baaki hai.” fucking dieeee, you psychopath.

lmaoooooooooooooooo her face when she doesn’t understand wtf this gift is supposed to be. i’ve been there sis. trying to fake enthusiasm for some reallllll bad gifts from men is truly painful.

also she’s so dang cute when they let her use her face properly!!!!!! har waqt bechaari ko bass rulaate rehte hain iss show mein.

one ainvayiiii gift ke bahaane some random cuteness.

sis gazing at him some more thinking omg he loves me soooooooo much.

she remembered ahaana’s warning, and is like no she was lying to me!!!!!!!!! stupid stupid stupiddddddd. no matter whoever planted her, you should believe that sister over your haraami misters. motive jo bhi ho, bol toh behen sach hi rahi thi.

yuck that looks ugly af. why the hell would you want that on your bedroom wall? esp. when your bedroom is already so goddamn fugly.

anyway he’s gaslighting her some more about ahaana blah blah.

riddhima like i’ll prove it. le, iska jee nahi bharaa. she wants to do more jasoosi and go get stuck in random traps that try to kill her.

vansh promising he’ll throw ahaana and her partners out if she can prove it. meaning you’ll........... throw yourself out?????

whatever man, idk and idc anymore what this fucker does. i’m just here for the faces.

threatening notes planted in all these ppl’s rooms. everyone instantly like OMG VANSHHHHHHHHHHH DID THISSSSS. lol coz who else does this chutiyaapa of leaving random messages around like this.

but nope. chachi saw riddhima’s earring lying there and knows it’s her.

isko bhi mila.

lmao kabir rueing the day he set eyes on riddhima coz jeena haraam kar rakha hai ladki ne.

riddhima like mwahahahahhaha they must have got my notes and now they’ll come attack me! behen, woh toh note ke bina bhi roz karte aaye hain...............

there. promptly got jumped.

surprise, surprise.

lol attitude toh dekho behen ka. wish she was the lead of the show instead of riddhima.

[lovlydovlyjaycie]

The Walking Dead / Supernatural: A World Changed

Hii so this is gonna be a story about a crossover but also not really a crossover from the walking dead and supernatural.

Summary: Y/N is from Boston and moved to Los Angeles to be a nanny, she’s been doing it for a while now and loves the two, soon to be three, children like they were her own. One day she goes to work and it seems like the world around her is falling apart. People are dying, unbeknownst to her they are coming back to live. She is trying to find a way so she stays alive and the people around her too and she needs help, but she’d rather does it on her own.

This part will talk more about what happened before y/n met the Winchesters. This will tell us why y/n has a hard time trusting people and staying in one place. There will be flashbacks and they are all written in italics.

Characters: Y/N, OC Alice Cattaneo , OC Mark Cattaneo , OC Birdy Cattaneo, OC Clark Cattaneo, OC Jayden Cattaneo,  Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester and more characters to come.

Warnings: DEATH, angst, language, violence. I think that is it.

I just wanna be clear, in this part and the next there will be talked about why OC Alice and OC Birdy are not in the story anymore.

Masterlist

Waiting around to die - The be good Tanyas

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0SmXVrLlZ4

Part 4 Lose it all

Day 735

It was midnight and I actually got out. I decided to find a place close by where we could rest until morning, because I can’t carry two children around all night. After a little walk I found a truck a little to the side of the road and decided to climb up there and spend the night. Like that the dead ones will not be able to reach us and we can all sleep.

-

In the morning I decided to get in as many miles as I possibly could. I don’t know if they’d be coming after me to look for us or not, so it was just better to get as far away as possible. We had enough food for the next three days so we should be fine. It would be easier if I would just have a car. I was in the middle of Lebanon now. Maybe there were cars there I could start.

I think I walked around for about thirty minutes to find a car until I found a grocery store. Maybe it’s worth checking to see what is still in there. I was getting closer to the doors of the store until I heard banging on the boarded windows inside. It sounded like there was a lot of dead in there. Not worth staying around and checking how many. ‘’Come on let’s get outta here.’’ I told Clark who was holding my hand.

We started walking away quickly I don’t wanna be anywhere near here when this goes wrong. We got maybe a few yards in when I heard windows break. That doesn’t sound good. I looked back and saw the dead ones come out one by one. There were maybe ten dead ones. Too many for me to take. especially with two kids. ‘’Mommy the monsters are coming.’’ Clark said. ‘’I know lets go.’’ We walked as quickly as Clarks legs could take. But not after too long I noticed that was not quick enough, so I picked him up and started running. The dead were getting really close. Only after two minutes of running I was getting out of breath. Clark was getting so heavy and having Jayden on my back in a makeshift backpack I had put him in. I tried to keep a steady pace until I fell over something that was on the ground. ‘’Of course this has to happen.’’ I said under my breath. I tried getting up so we could go on and keep moving out of there, but my ankle was hurting so much. Then I heard screeching tires from an enormous truck. It stopped right in front of us. It was a SWAT truck. Something on the roof went up and I saw machine guns come out. Oh shit. I ducked and put Clark and Jayden under me. The guns started shooting and the bodies started falling to the ground. I looked back and saw all the dead ones were on the ground. A woman got out the truck with shot hair. ‘’Hey are you and your kids alright?’’ She asked. ‘’Uhm, Yes thank you.’’ I looked at her a bit in shock. she doesn’t look like she’s in a SWAT team and it certainly looks like she’s alone. ‘’ I’m Al. I’m a journalist, would you mind telling me your story?’’

Al took Clark, Jayden and I over to a farm that had enough coverage from trees. I trusted her to get us here safely, she did save us from a lot of dead ones after all. ‘’Is she going to help us now?’’ Asked Clark quietly. This is all so confusing for them of course. I mean one moment it is ok to go with stranger, Dean and Sam, and then the other moment we sneak out. What kinda example am I? ‘’I don’t know yet Clark.. we have to wait and see.’’ I felt bad that I didn’t have a better answer. In all honesty... I didn’t know what I was doing and I hated that. ‘’Why did we leave the other people?’’ Clark asked. ‘’I- I.. it’s better like this... the three of us.’’ I tried to sound very convincing, but I didn’t even believe myself. I thought it was the right thing to do, but now.. I’m not so sure.

‘’Alright I got everything set up. When ever you’re ready.’’ Al said. She was referring to the place she set up for me to tell my story. I wanted to tell someone so bad what happened to me in the past two years so badly, but I promised I would keep it to myself. I’ve been living this lie for so long.. do I even know the truth, the full truth. ‘’I guess I’m ready.’’ I said as I picked up Jayden. He doesn’t say a lot yet. Only mamma, bubba which means Clark and a few other handful of words. It’s my fault he doesn’t talk much. If I just had the time to teach him some more words, but because we’re always on the move I don’t have time for it. We have to be quiet. I walked up to the place Al set up and sat down on a box where I had to sit down. ‘’Alright we’re rolling. Why don’t you start with your name and your kids’ and tell me where you’re from.’’ I nodded my head. ‘’Uhmm well, I’m y/f/n and this here is Jayden and that is Clark over there. We’re from LA.’’ I motioned to Clark who was playing with some sticks he had found. Al turned around and got him on camera. ‘’That’s a long way. How did you end up in Kansas?’’ She asked. I promised I wouldn’t tell I didn’t know she wanted my story really from that far back. ‘’It doesn’t matter, but how we got here to you was because we left some people.’’ I stated. My heart started beating faster and I held Jayden a little closer. I was getting nervous and Al could clearly see this. ‘’I see, but I wanna know your full story.. If you’re worried about anybody else seeing this, you don’t have to worry. I’ll keep it safe somewhere no one for a long time will get it.’’ She tried to reassure me. ‘’Then why do this, if no one is gonna see this anyway.’’ I really wanted to tell someone my story, but I’m not sure if I can risk it. ‘’Because some day someone will and they will see how we lived and how we survived or had to survive. Everybody has a story, I just record them and put them away and let time deal with it.’’ She told me, she was trying to make sure that I felt comfortable with this, but still I wasn’t convinced. ‘’Where are you gonna put them away?’’ I asked. ‘’I have a place in Texas where I’m headed to. I have a safe there. I promise you, your story will be safe with me. Whatever your story is.’’ I let out a deep breath. Fine, it might do me good to get this off my chest. ‘’Alright I trust you. I’m y/f/n and this is Jayden Cattaneo and that is Clark Cattaneo. Before this, I was their nanny.’’ 

-

Day 28

It took me and Alice twenty-eight days to finally get to Colorado. It took about five days to get out of Los Angeles alone. They bombed Los Angeles after two week of trying to control everything. Luckily for us I guess we were far enough away from it when it happened. But we definitely felt the earth shake and heard the screams afterwards. They still haunt me. It was so hard getting to Colorado, but the hardest part was getting through the mountains in Colorado. There were either bears trying to eat us or the dead.. Which still sounds insane to me. I’ve been the one mostly killing the dead, since Alice is pregnant and we’re with kids. I think I’ve killed like thirteen of the dead. Which is insane. Deep in thought I looked around. Alice was driving through some abandoned town. I looked in the back of the car. Clark was sleeping, he was so peaceful and oblivious to the world. Birdy was looking around, she was trying to understand the world. She knew the monsters are bad and if you get bit that that’s even worse. That’s what we told her. I mean what are you supposed to tell a three year old about the world going to shit. Even if we didn’t tell her I know she’d figure it out anyway, she’s so smart. She looked at me. ‘’Y/n, do you know when we’re gonna see daddy?’’ She asked. I smiled at her. ‘’Very soon, Birdy. We’re almost there.’’ She looked back at the window trying to see what ever she could see outside, maybe her dad. ‘’I think we should make camp here and then I think we should be at the army base tomorrow.’’ Alice told when she drove up to a house that had covering from all the trees. It looked secluded, it looked safe. ‘’Alright, let me check around if there are any monsters. Then I’ll come back when it’s safe.’’ I told them. I stepped out of the car with a hand gun and went towards the house.

I looked through the windows and tapped them. It looked like there was nobody in there. I went towards the front door and opened it. Not locked. I was on alert, hopefully nothing would jump on me. Walking in the hallway there was nobody there, not in the living room, kitchen, bedrooms and bathrooms, it was safe. I walked back and said they could come in. I got Birdy out of her car seat and we both got our stuff and walked towards the house. It was getting dark and cloudy, it might rain soon. 

Later that evening we were eating beans for the hundredth time since the world ended. The people that had lived here before probably left this place with all the good food. We were all getting over eating beans, but Clark always seemed to be happy with any kind of food. He was easy to please. Good, he didn’t need much. Birdy was telling about all the things she saw when we were driving. a lot of wild animals also a few monsters, but she didn’t seem to be afraid of it, at least not while she was talking about it. Alice was always so happy to hear her talk about everything and everything. It was probably distracting her from this long trip to get to Colorado and to Mark. It made me feel sad that it took us so long to get here, but now where so close. It was only one more day and we should be there.

After dinner Alice cleaned up everything while I was with Birdy and Clark. We were playing with some toy cars we found along the way. Clark was like a sponge, he’d soak up any word we’d say to him. You could almost have a whole conversation with him. ‘’No Clark, the cars have to go this way.’’ Birdy said and pulled the car out of his hands. ‘’Hey, Birdy, that is Clarks car, can you give it back please?’’ I told Birdy. ‘’Car, Car, No.’’ Clark said. ‘’See he wants to play. If you just show him where to go, he’ll follow you, he’s smart just like you.’’ She looked at Clark and gave him the car back. ‘’Car.’’ Clark said. ‘’Ok Bubba, follow me.’’ She said. And Clark did like she told him. I smiled. They were following each other and making car noises. ‘’Vrooommmm.’’ Clark imitated and so did Birdy. Both going around the living room. I looked outside it was raining now, just as I expected. It was so calming after all this chaos. Then I heard something looked shatter on the ground. ‘’I’m sorry, I’m sorry.’’ Birdy said while she was picking up pieces from a vase that fell. ‘’It’s ok. It’s raining outside. The monsters won’t hear us. It’s ok.’’ I walked towards Birdy and told Clark to go look for mamma so he wouldn’t touch the pieces of glass on the floor. ‘’Let me do it, it’s ok.’’ I told Birdy. I started picking up the pieces and then saw that she had a cut on her upper arm, probably that’s how it fell. ‘’You ok Birdy? Why don’t you go to mamma, she can help you with that.’’ I told Birdy. ‘’I’m ok. I’m brave.’’ She answered back. I smiled at her. ‘’I know you’re brave, but you have a cut on your arm and we don’t want to have it get infected ok.’’ Birdy nodded her head and walked to the kitchen where Alice was. I cleaned up all the pieces that had fallen on the ground and made sure there was nothing left. Outside I saw a trashcan earlier, so I walked out in the rain and put it in there. ‘’Not like the trash is gonna be picked up anytime soon.’’ I said under my breath. And I stood there for a while in the cold rain. I closed my eyes and put my face up towards the sky. This was probably the closest thing that I would be getting to a shower. After taking the short moment in I walked back inside. Alice was making them ready for ‘bed’ which was in this case one of the couches these people had and a big chair for Birdy that was next to the couch where Clark was laying down. Alice was telling them a story for them to fall asleep.

After a while when both Birdy and Clark had fallen asleep Alice walked up to me. ‘’I’ll take the first shift, you get some rest.’’ She told me. ‘’Alice you’ve been driving for four hours today with no stops.. and let’s not forget you’re pregnant. I’ll take the first one, you get some rest ok.’’ She nodded her head. and walked towards the other couch and laid down. I got the handgun we had put away from the children and sat on the stairs by the front door.

After a couple of uneventful hours it was Alice’s turn to keep watch and for me to sleep.

Day 29

‘‘Aaahh.’‘ I got woken up by a scream. It was Alice. The was a dead one inside. I went right in to action and got a remote that was on the table. I ran towards the dead and tried to hit it in the head. Which was wishful thinking, cause how am I supposed to kill one of them with a remote. I pulled the dead off Alice and fell on the floor with the dead on top of me. I could only try to push him off me and to try and not have him bite me. All of a sudden I see Birdy running up with a big book in her hands and hitting the dead. ‘‘NO BIRDY GET BACK!’‘ The monster was trying to get to Birdy now and got her arm. She fell on the ground with the dead getting way too close for my liking. I grabbed the book that Birdy had dropped and hit the monster in the head. I hit him hard enough where he fell over. But before he tried to get up I gathered all my strength and put the book right through his face. He was really dead now. In all of this I just now heard Clark crying.

‘‘Birdy are you ok?’‘ I asked straight away. ‘‘I’m ok, I was brave.’‘ She said while he stood up and grabbed her arm. ‘‘Did he try to grab your arm there? Let me take a look.’‘ I said walking towards her. ‘‘It’s the cut.’‘ She said and put the band aid over where she got her cut yesterday. I wanted to walk towards Clark to make sure he was ok, but I heard some muffled noises behind me. Alice. She was in pain. ‘‘I’m ok. I just kinda fell down the stairs, but I’m ok. I’m sorry, I fell asleep and then all of a sudden there was a dead one. I’m so sorry.’’ Alice apologized. ‘’It’s ok, nobody got bit.’’ I helped Alice up and walk her towards the couch. Birdy was reassuring Clark. She is so protective of him it was so sweet.

-

After the whole incident we got out of there pretty quickly. We were about two minutes away from the base now and I was driving. Alice still looked a little uncomfortable from the fall, but the excitement on her face was more noticeable. She was finally going to see her husband again. Birdy and Clark were finally going to see their dad again. Meanwhile I was thinking on what I should do after we get there. I kinda wanna try and get to Boston, to my family, if they’re still alive. I had to know if they were.

And then we saw it Fort Carson. The army base where Mark should be. We were coming up to the gates and the guards were pointing their guns at us, machine guns. I stopped the car. ‘’Let me go out and talk to them, they’ll see I’m pregnant, they won’t shoot.’’ Alice told me. It was our best option. ‘’Alright, be careful.’’ I gave her a smile. She went out of the car with her hands up and closed the door. ‘’Mamma.’’ Clark said. ‘’Mamma will be right back, she’s going to talk to those people to see if your daddy is there.’’ I told both Clark and Birdy. It was going to be ok, this is why we took this trip. We’ll be safe here.

Five people of the army came walking outside. They all had machineguns and two handguns strapped on their belts. They were pointing them down. I’m assuming they have more weapons, but I couldn’t see it. Alice put her hands down and motioned for me to come. ‘’Can you get Clark?’’ I nodded and walked to the side where Clark was strapped in behind the drivers seat. ‘’Mamma.’’ He said again. ‘’Mamma id right there.’’ I told him as I pointed to Alice. He was moving around wanting to get out of my grip so I let him go and he ran to Alice. ‘’Come here little Bubbers.’’ Alice said. ‘’Birdy go to y/n and hold her hand.’’ She walked towards me and grabbed my hand. ‘’Everything is ok.’’ I reassured her, she looked a bit scared, but when I told her that she put up her brave face. ‘’ I’m sergeant Tyler, this is Michael, Tony, Billy and Mason. It’s safe inhere and we can check for your husband Mark when were inside. a lot of people have been going in and out lately. We just need to check if you are infected with this.’’ He pointed to a device that he was holding. ‘’What are your names.?’’ Sergeant Tyler asked. ‘’This Is Clark.’’ She said while holding Clark. ‘’That is his big sister Birdy and that is.. or was our nanny y/n. She has helped us a lot along the way to get here. She’s basically family.’’ She told them. I just gave them an awkward wave. ‘’Alright, but when you get inside we will have to separate you for a little bit. Security reasons.’’ He smiled in the most disturbing way. I brushed the comment off like it wasn’t weird. ‘’That’s alright, but I am allowed to get back to them right?’’ I asked, they were basically family now and I wanted to make sure they were safe. ‘’Sure, of course all in due time.’’ Sergeant Tyler responded back. He didn’t sit right with me. ‘’Well lets get you checked out and get you inside.’’ Sergeant Tyler gave the device to the soldier Michael who was standing next to him. Michael, sergeant Tyler and Billy walked towards us. Birdy was hiding a little bit behind me. I crouched down to her eye level. ‘’It’s ok. They’re gonna check if we’re sick and if we’re not we can go in. I’ll go first, you’ll see it’s fine.’’ I tried to reassure Birdy. ‘’Ok, y/n.’’ She said. ‘’I’ll put on my brave face.’’ She told me. ‘’And so will I.’’ I said. ‘’Let me go first’’  I told Michael. He nodded and walked towards me. He put the device up against my head and it made one beep. ‘’Safe.’’ He said. ‘’Alright Tony, Mason take her inside.’’ Sergeant Tyler said. ‘’We’ll see each other inside, you’ll be ok Birdy.’’ I gave her a kiss on the head and let her hand go, she went straight for Alice’s leg and held on to her. Then I gave Clark a kiss on his head and Alice a hug. ‘’I’ll see you inside ok.’’ I told them one more time and then I got escorted by Mason and Tony. I looked back and saw Alice crouching down next to Birdy, it was Birdy’s turn. 

Walking up to the gate I didn’t see a lot of people inside at all. Then I heard screaming. I tried to look back but, Mason and Tony were holding me. What was going on? BANG! My heart started racing, that was a gunshot. I gathered all the strength I got and finally turned around. I saw Birdy laying in the ground, still. there was blood pooling around her tiny body. ‘’NOO!’’ Alice was screaming crying next to her and so was Clark. I felt my whole body rush with adrenaline and I only saw red. Everything started going in slow-motion. Mason and Tony were trying to grab me, but in doing so they had their hands full with me, so I did the most logical thing and grabbed Masons handgun that was strapped on his belt and shot him in his head. Then I shot Tony and took his machine gun from his body that dropped down. I ran over to Alice and Clark. Billy tried to shoot at me, but I was faster. ‘’RUN!’’ I yelled at Alice. She grabbed Clark in tears. In an opening I grabbed Michael by his shoulder and was pointing the gun at his back. ‘’DROP YOUR WEAPONS!’’ I yelled at them. Michael did as he was told. Tyler was taking a few steps back. ‘’Think about this for a second.’’ He said. ‘’You’ll die out there.’’ He said while trying to point the gun at me, but I was hiding behind Michael. ‘’JUST LET IT GO MAN, YOU FUCKED UP.” Michael said. ‘’You shouldn’t have done that.’’ It was Tyler that did it then. I wanted to strangle him, but I had to think about this for a second. Tyler was not shooting me because I had Michael. I had leverage. ‘’You’re dead here too, I just killed your friends. You pick her up carefully.’’ I pressed my gun into Michaels back to make him hurry up. He slowly crouched down and picked Birdy up. I crouched down with him. ‘’Now you sergeant stay here. Or this friend of yours will also get a bullet in his head.’’ I threatened. My whole body was shaking from adrenaline. We backed up slowly, towards the woods that Alice and Clark ran in.

  Birdy just got killed and I killed three people.

...

..

.

This was a lot. Let me know what you think.

[captcas]

Worth Fighting For

WORTH FIGHTING FOR by capthamm

Killian “Hook” Jones is a dominate up and comer in the UFC while Emma “The Savior” Swan’s career was cut short. When Hook’s manager moves up and the office brings in UFC’s youngest legend to keep him in check, will either of them be able to handle it?

read on ao3 // tumblr: ch 1/ ch 2

[CHAPTER 3/?]

Saturday night brings their monthly movie/game night and Emma has never been more grateful for a distraction. Ruby and the Nolans will come over around 6 o’clock and Henry is practically bouncing off the walls with excitement. Tonight’s theme is Star Wars and this will be Henry’s official introduction to the series; at David’s insistence they’re starting with A New Hope and going release order from there. They’re also going to play Star Wars trivia which Henry will undoubtedly suck at.

Should be a fun night all around.

And it was, until Henry went to bed and the “adults” got to talking.

Ruby cracks another beer and turns to Emma, “So, Emma, you’ve got probably the coolest new job in the world and you haven’t said jack shit.”

She shoots Ruby an icy glare as David and MM stop bickering over whether or not Kylo Ren deserved a redemption arc to hear what Emma has to say.

Emma sighs, “It’s going alright. All the onboarding is underway and between the perks, benefits, and pay, Henry should be set for life.” She’s been fortunate to live off her winnings for the past nine years, being mindful of money and not giving into the lifestyle of frivolous spending many fighters take on, but -even her friends know- she doesn’t have a money tree.

The looks on their faces when she mentions Henry being set for life could melt 1000 Olafs. When she arrived at Ruth Nolan’s home at the age of 16, she never expected to find a family. Hardened by a life too lived for anyone her age, Emma assumed they’d be like every other foster home and use her for the money. To this day, she’s never been so happy to be wrong.

Emma’s not sure what twist of fate landed an orphan with such a great support system, but she’ll be forever grateful. David took to the “protective brother” role immediately. Soon after Emma moved in, he met Mary Margaret (fireworks and butterflies and all that mumbo jumbo) who introduced them to Ruby. They’re small, and maybe a bit scrappy, but they’re family.

She breaks out of her thoughts and returns to the present, “I will need some babysitting though; I’m required to attend each of my client’s Fight Nights. But overall it’s great, really!”

She hopes she squeaked away without having to mention Jones at all but the glint in Ruby’s eye tells her otherwise. “Ok that’s all fine and dandy,” Mary Margaret shoots Ruby an incredulous look, warning her to tread carefully, but Ruby ignores her and continues, “but who’s the client?”

David is giving her a protective father vibe, Ms is practically vibrating, and she's pretty sure Ruby is salivating. Emma sighs realizing she shouldn’t postpone the inevitable, “Killian Jones.”

Ruby practically drops her drink and Mary Margaret squeals, David rolls his eyes and turns back to the TV where SportsCenter has been playing in the background. Mary Margaret beats Ruby to the punch, “THE Killian Jones?! As in Killian “Hook” Jones?!”

Emma nods, standing up to refill the only slightly empty chip bowl in front of her. She knew this was going to happen and she wasn’t exactly looking forward to her friends thirsting over her client– client… right.

Ruby speaks next, “Well that is probably the best case scenario. Do you think he can get us tickets? Have you met him? Is he as gorgeous in person as he is on TV? Can we meet him?”

Emma, now glad she’s in the kitchen with space to breathe, is starting to feel a bit overwhelmed. She knows Ms can sense it and is unsurprised when she speaks next,“For Christ’s sake Ruby let her breathe. She’s probably only had her initial meeting with him.”

Ruby seems to get the hint and it doesn’t take long before Ms is in the kitchen helping Emma pick up the leftover pizza, “We’re happy for you, Emma. He’s a huge client for them, they obviously trust you to do a good job.” Emma nods in thanks and they both head back into the living room. Her sister-in-law’s warmth always calms her (and Ruby) down which allows David to jump in and change the subject to the coverage of some football player’s arrest on SportsCenter. Emma finally catches a breath and realizes just how lucky she is for the friend dynamic they have before settling in to debate if this James Spencer kid should still be eligible for the draft.

As she lays in bed that night, Ms’ words ring through her head. Despite the rollercoaster of emotions she’s been feeling, Killian is a huge client, one that was formerly represented by a namesake for the company. This re energizes her a bit and helps her fall asleep, actually excited for what's to come.

She wakes up Sunday morning and makes Henry some pancakes and declares it a lazy Sunday. Henry happily obliged, cuddling up on the couch with The Deathly Hallows while Emma threw on some shitty reality TV.

. . .

When her alarm rings Monday morning, Emma pulls her pillow over her head like some teenager from one of those Disney Channel movies.

It takes her a second to remember what day it is and why she’s up at this godforsaken hour.

Killian Jones. Right.

She audibly groans before rolling out of bed and getting ready for the day. Between her shower and breakfast she gets Henry up. School starts at 8 so he’s technically running a bit behind but he’ll make it on the bus in time… hopefully.

She’s pouring him a bowl of cereal when he comes out of his room zipping up his sweater and rubbing his eyes.

“Hey, kid. Coco Puffs or Fruit Loops?” He mumbles some semblance of what she thinks is Fruit Loops so she pours the bowl and slides it across the kitchen island. He smiles in thanks as she pours her own bowl and sits beside him.

“So today’s the big day?”

She didn’t tell Henry about her new client and when she spoke to the Nolan’s and Ruby, he was definitely supposed to be sleeping. “How could you possibly know that?”

“You’re not as quiet as you think you are and I’m not as tired as you think I am.” He yawns as if to punctuate his point.

“Uh huh, sure, kid.” He gives her a knowing glance and she realizes she’s not getting out of this. She runs her hands over her face and sighs, “Yes, today is the first meeting and I’m only slightly nervous to fu— screw this whole thing up.”

Henry chuckles at her attempted censorship (she never said she was a perfect parent), “You’ll be great, Mom, and Hook seems like a decent enough guy. I’m sure he won’t give you too much trouble.”

She stares at Henry a bit dumbfounded. It shocks her everyday how old he’s getting– nine going on nineteen for sure.  “Are you hiding some Weasley’s Extendable Ears in your room or something? Are you a wizard? Should you be at Hogwarts?” Emma is very obviously trying to derail this conversation but it works, setting Henry off about how he’s finally on the sixth book and explaining the concept of a horcrux.

Oh, her sweet summer child.

God, maybe he is old enough for UFC.

When did that happen?

She ushers Henry to the bus, promising him they’ll watch the sixth movie tonight if he finishes the book today and is to school on time. It’s only September and he can’t be late three times in the first month of school. She kisses his forehead and he wishes her good luck.

Sometimes she wonders how such a screw up ended up with the perfect kid.

After cleaning up the kitchen, Emma finishes getting ready. She jumps on the subway and finds herself at the office with a half hour to spare. She’s never early so she chalks it up to nerves and uses the time to prep for this meeting.

Over the weekend she received multiple emails from Gold’s team surrounding a possible spot for Killian on the card for the pay-per-view Fight Night in November.

A pay-per-view card. She did enough research about Killian this weekend to know that would be his first.

Emma feels like she’s been thrown into the deep end before being taught how to swim.

Go big or go home.

She did a lot of research about Killian and learned practically nothing. She knows he came here from London almost ten years ago and that his team includes his head trainer Robin (husband of now former manager Regina Mills), and three other men named Will Scarlett, August Booth, and William Smee (he’s really selling it with that whole Hook theme). Other than that all she found was his record and highlights. He’s 6-0 which is insane for only being in the circuit for a year and a half– fighters are usually limited to three, maybe four fights a year.

4 of his 6 are knockouts.

He’s good… really good.

Her thoughts are interrupted by a light tapping on the edge of her cubicle. She glances up to find none other than the man himself. She can’t help but double take.

Real professional, Emma.

She's only ever seen him in the ring, at the gym, or dressed up for a business meeting. She’s not sure what she expected, but a leather jacket and pants that fit him like his own skin definitely weren’t it.

He looks good… really good.

Emma snaps herself out of it, “Hi, Mr. Jones, just give me a moment and we can head to the conference room.”

“It’s Killian, love, please.” She notices he winces at the seemingly habitual pet name. Emma ignores the ring of disappointment that runs through her gut at the realization that it may not be reserved for her. “A conference room’s a bit formal, don’t you think? Let’s get out of here, Swan.”

He grabs her hand before she can answer. “Mr.— Killian. Is this allowed?”

He chuckles. “We can plan the meetings at our leisure,” he says the last bit in an almost scary imitation of Regina, “but even still, Regina and I never met in office. A bit silly for two people to take up an entire conference room, yeah? Come on, lass, try something new. It’s called trust.”

Emma rolls her eyes but follows along anyway. The elevator ride should’ve been awkward but Killian kept the conversation flowing by asking her preferred drink. “Coffee, tea, or smoothies?”

Despite the risk of sounding like a child, Emma finds herself being honest with him, “Uhh, I actually prefer hot chocolate… with cinnamon.”

He smiles brightly at her, as though her drink order was the most brilliant discovery this century, “Perfect, Swan. I know just the place.”

She was so swept up in his ambush, she doesn’t realize that this isn’t the cocky, asshat Killian Jones she sees on tv or at the gym until he’s practically dragging her across the street to a small cafe. This Killian seems genuine and carries this almost childlike excitement.

Emma tells herself she has no interest in learning more about this Killian.

(Emma doesn’t have to tell herself that that is complete bullshit.)

. . .

He can’t stop himself from beaming when she offers up her drink order without hesitation. Killian feels like a bloody teenager around her. He promised himself he wouldn’t feel this way again, but something about Emma Swan has completely entranced him.

He finds himself fascinated with every part of her, including the small things, like the fact she takes cinnamon on her hot chocolate.

Once they get to the cafe across the street, Killian forces himself to dial it back. He can tell she’s guarded and as much as he’d like to be friends (more than friends) with the lass, he knows business has to come first.

It wouldn’t exactly be a good look for him if he ran “The Savior” out of the office on her second day.

Somehow he thinks he doesn’t have that power.

He’d like to. (Obviously not to run her out of the office, but he’d like his existence to mean that much to her.)

Bloody hell, he's being ridiculous.

They sit down across from each other at a small table by the window. He expects to start the conversation but before he can form a coherent thought she’s speaking.

“So, Killian. I’ve already received some correspondence from Gold’s team. I’m not sure how much time you usually take between fights and I know it’s already the end of September but…”

She’s rambling and he doesn’t think he’s ever seen anybody so adorable when they’re nervous.

Adorable is not a professional descriptor.

Killian Jones doesn’t want “professional” with Emma Swan.

Fuck.

“...Gold is hoping to get you on the main card for November 14th.”

Did she just say main card?

He chokes on his coffee.

“Main card, Swan? I’ve never been on the main card. Strictly early prelims…”

She eyes him suspiciously, “Usually that’s a good thing. Upward momentum and all that. His team is clearly impressed by your dominant record.”

“Is his team the only one impressed?” The flirt escapes him before he can stop it.  

Bloody idiot.

She doesn’t even bat an eye, “The entire league seems to be impressed, Jones.” Her tone tells him she knows what just happened but she shut it down immediately.

He likes a challenge.

Emma Swan may be his favorite challenge yet.

Emma Swan is off limits, but Killian will be damned if he cares.

. . .

Emma is surprised when Killian pays for their drinks despite her insistence that she can charge it to Mills Management. She’s also surprised by how nice he is.

She keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop.

She’s still waiting.

He’s definitely flirtatious, every other sentence being easily twisted into some sort of innuendo, but she can tell it’s a front. The little things he does like tipping the barista an extra fifty cents or holding the door for her, let on to the man behind the persona.

Well, and the fact he practically chokes when she tells him they want him for the main card.

He seems genuinely shocked that anyone would be impressed by him. His mask comes out almost immediately, another innuendo laced into his question. She doesn’t let him go there, shutting it down as quickly as it started. For this to work, she needs him the real him. Not the cocky MMA fighter who he used to catch the eye of UFC execs. She compliments him, and it’s beyond genuine. That seems to calm his nerves a bit as they move into social media management and he shifts into a professionalism she’s not entirely prepared for.

She’s not sure she wants professional Killian Jones.

Whoa, Emma, pump the breaks.

She shakes it off as she watches him take notes on what she’s saying about the importance of a lead up on Twitter and how it can set the tone for the entire fight. His tongue runs along the inside of his lower lip as he concentrates and she can’t help the overwhelming wave of attraction that hits her.

Like lightning.

It’s not just the tongue, (but that’s not helping) it’s his dedication to this sport and how he actually gives a fuck about what she’s saying. Killian never displayed even a hint of the deeply rooted misogyny that runs rampant throughout the industry. He actually seems almost humbled by her presence. The words escape her mouth before she can’t stop them, “Why are you actually taking anything I say seriously?”

Very professional, Emma. Way to instill confidence in your client. Smooth.

His head snaps up at her abrupt question and he looks confused. “I know you don’t like being called a legend, Swan, but you were a damn good fighter. If I walk out of this partnership with half the following and success you had, I’d call that a win.”

She’s stunned by his sincerity.

Brick. Wall. (She thinks she hears Pink Floyd somewhere in the distance.)

“And I suppose you think you know all about me from our, what, three conversations now?” She knows it’s snippy, that’s the point.

He stops typing and puts his phone down. “Pardon me, love, but you’re a bit of an open book.”

Emma scoffs, “Anyone with the internet knows I prefer people don’t call me a legend.”

“Aye, but do they know it’s because you feel too young with a career too short to have made an impact? That you feel choosing yourself, a life, over MMA removes all glory from your name?”

Emma is entirely shaken by his apparent ability to read her like a fucking picture book. (Does that even make sense? Do you read picture books?) Emma never had a formal retirement ceremony; gloves in the middle of the ring and all that. She had asked Gold to be taken off the roster and for a quiet exit and that’s what he’d given her. The public doesn’t know the real reason she left MMA, her attempt at keeping Henry’s life as normal as possible, but somehow Killian–

Brick. Brick. Brick.

“Let’s talk about Instagram.” She sees the disappointment sweep across his face, realizing she can read him pretty well too. That’s terrifying.

Way more terrifying than social media plans.

They keep it strictly business for the rest of the meeting. She’s startled when her stomach rumbles and she checks the time.

12:00. They’ve been strategizing for three hours.

She’s not sure where the time went, and when Killian asks her if she wants to grab a bite to eat together, she’s startled again by her initial gut reaction to say yes.

Obviously, she says no and makes up some lie about needing to get back to the office. He knows it’s a lie, she can see it all over his face. He doesn’t push her though, and she’s grateful. They set their next meeting and Emma’s heart speeds up, seemingly unaware that this is a business meeting and not a date. She shakes his hand and promises to have a full plan ready for Thursday before practically sprinting out of the cafe.

In three conversations Killian Jones has gone from asshat to… who knows. One thing Emma does know is that Killian Jones is off limits to the highest of ethical degrees. But what scares her most, is that she’s not entirely sure she cares.

. . .

As soon as he asks her to lunch he knows he’s pushed too far.

Actually, he perhaps pushed too far by letting on just how easy it was for him to read her, but lunch, well that was just asking for a brick wall. He runs his hands across his face, completely taken with someone he has no right to. She’s witty, smart, and could probably kick his ass— scratch that, could definitely kick his ass— but she also has demons, he can see them swimming behind her eyes. Demons that seem scarily similar to his, maybe not on the surface but definitely in their damage. Emma is raw and unapologetic; a real human being who is, for all intents and purposes, unimpressed by the suave persona of Killian “Hook” Jones.

She’s bloody perfect.

He’s fucking fucked.

Eloquent.

Killian decides to grab a quick lunch from the cafe and head to the gym. He has a lot of pent up frustration and really feels the need to punch something. Thank god that’s his job. He scarfs down his sandwich, not realizing how hungry he was and jumps on the subway to the training center. He miraculously finds a seat and is able to scroll through his phone a bit. As he pokes around Twitter he finds an article announcing Emma “The Savior” Swan’s comeback to the UFC. He clicks on it, curiosity getting the better of him despite probably knowing the gist of the article.

He didn’t expect a timeline of her very impressive career:

2008: Swan joins the UFC with her Boston gym. Her debut match against Aurora Rose ended in a TKO. She’s back in action six months later fighting Ella Tremaine. She wins again, this time after three rounds by split decision.

2009: A dominant start to the year for The Savior with a first round submission against Tiana Dampier in January. She rounded out her year with another first round submission against El Oldenburg in May, and a third round knockout against Esmerelda Gringoire in October.

2010: Swan goes three rounds with Merida Baer and wins by unanimous decision. Swan wins again after three rounds by split decision against Megara Alcmene. The Savior’s final match is a KO against Mulan Fa rounding out her record to 8-0. Her next match, meant to be for the women’s title, was declined with no comment from The Savior.

2020: Swan joins Mills Management as a talent manager assigned to Killian “Hook” Jones.

Killian knew Swan was good, an early legend in her own right, but he had no idea she was this dominant. He also had no idea she left without so much as a wave goodbye. He figured he’d just missed the announcement seeing as it came well before his introduction into the sport. Against his typical moral code, he tries to google why she left but finds nothing. She knocks out Mulan Fa and then just stops being added to cards and fades away as new fighters take her place.

He knows there’s a reason for her secrecy and he’d be lying if he said curiosity was the only driving force behind his attempt to learn more. He finds himself wanting to know everything there is to know about Emma Swan; a deeper part of him aches for her to be the one who tells him.

He’s positive he can only dream of gaining that level of trust from her, but he has to try. Liam's words ring heavy in his ears, "A man unwilling to fight for what he wants, deserves what he gets."

He gets off at the stop closest to the training center and walks through the front doors, waving to Belle at the front desk before heading into the locker room. He’s fortunate to be on the UFC roster, allowing him to keep his training gear at the center and not have to worry about lugging it around with him. It also gives him the freedom to come here whenever he needs to let off some steam. He changes quickly and finds a treadmill to warm up. He jogs a mile and a half before picking up the pace. Killian’s in the midst of his runner’s high when someone steps into the machine next to him. He turns his head to offer them a small smile in hello, it’s not that big of a gym, exclusive to the UFC industry and a few friends of friends, so chances are he knows the person at least in passing.

Oh, Killian knows them alright, and he practically falls off the treadmill when he sees her green eyes blown wide.

[zmediaoutlet]

in support of Black Lives Matter, @scgemini donated $50, and requested ‘Jensen/Jeff sneaking around on set with peeping tom Jared.’ Thank you for donating!

to get your own personalized fic, please see this post. (no longer taking prompts)

“Okay, everybody, we’re going to call that lunch. Crew, back at 1:30; cast at 2:00.”

Jared wasn’t even in the scene, but he relaxes. It’s boring in his trailer when he’s waiting to shoot coverage and, anyway, this is a fun crew. Greg the sound guy high-fives Jared as he heads for craft services and Tori the script supervisor invites him for beers later at their new favorite bar. “I’m so there,” Jared says. “In fact, I’m so there I’m actually already there, and I’m waiting for you to show!”

Tori grins at him, rolls her eyes. “Yeah, yeah. See you later.”

Most everyone’s cleared out of the set already. There’s a little huddle going on near the screens as they work out something about--Jared doesn’t know, editing or whatever--but other than that, the cast and crew pretty much evaporate when lunch gets called. Means it’s pretty quiet, on the stages. Means there’s privacy, if anyone needs it.

Jensen was gone about one minute after the cut was called. Time enough to smile at people, shake the hand of the extra they’d brought in for the scene. Enough to be polite and not suspicious, and--well, who’d be suspicious? Jensen’s perfect. Jared’s oversensitive, maybe. With what he knows.

He’s still wearing Sam’s costume, from shooting a few scenes ago, and they’re going to pick up a Dean and Sam scene after lunch. The sneakers are soft, comfortable, nearly silent as he walks through the stages, getting further and further in. Darker, back here, with only the ambient lights high up in the ceiling illuminating things, and he sticks his hands in his pockets, tries to chill out. He doesn’t even know if what he’s looking for is going to be there. No need to get excited, before it’s time.

He passes the interior set for Bobby’s house, all tumbled props and fake dust. A motel shell, currently half-stripped for another new insane design. Furthest back is a bar set, this new roadhouse location they’re bringing in for next episode, and he hears--a laugh, and stops in his tracks, and has to take a deep breath.

It was an accident, the first time. He really didn’t know what he was walking into. It had been that episode with the shadow demons, when John Winchester met up with his sons again, and afterward they’d all gone drinking and Jeff bought everybody rounds--was charming, and funny, and awesome. Jared liked him a lot; Jensen liked him even more. They’d gone back to Jeff’s rental house for a few more drinks, after the bar, and Jared had gone to the bathroom and then he’d spent some time talking shit at Hank and Mike playing that basketball game on the Playstation, and then he’d realized Jeff and Jensen were MIA, and he’d looked in the kitchen and in the den, and he’d turned into the hall down to the bedrooms and he’d--

They’re here. Another laugh--Jensen says, “Shut up,” quiet but not quiet enough that it doesn’t carry, and Jeff says, a little louder, “Maybe you should make me,” and Jared bites the inside of his cheek. Every time. This happens every time there’s been a John Winchester scene, and he doesn’t know how he’s getting this lucky.

The roadhouse set has a big frame--wooden walls, a bar. He’s careful as he comes up to the side, listens careful. Jeff says, “Oh, that’s right,” dirty and nasty-low like Jeff’s voice can get, and Jensen makes a--sound, something Jared’s gotten to recognize. That’s Jensen turned on beyond belief, wanting something. Jared bites his lip, eases closer. Lines up, against the very edge of the set, and peeks around, and sees:

Oh, fuck. Jeff’s in street wear, with his coverage finished for the day; Jensen’s still in Dean’s hospital clothes, and Jeff has him crowded up against the edge of a pool table, his hands under the thin white shirt, his mouth up against the back of Jensen’s ear. They’re in profile to where Jared’s watching and the lights are dim, but Jared can still see how Jensen’s eyes slide shut and how he tips his hips back against Jeff’s crotch, how Jeff’s hand moves under the shirt and Jensen huffs out a low fuck.

“You said to be quiet,” Jeff says, low and teasing, and Jensen flails a hand back and grabs his hip, says, “Oh, fuck you,” and Jeff grins and kisses his shoulder. Soft, almost sweet, and Jared presses his temple against the set wall, hot and sick inside. God, they look good together. Comfortable, knowing each other’s bodies, and even that first time when Jeff had Jensen pressed against the wall in that hallway, practically eating his mouth, it looked--right. Like that was how it should be.

Jeff’s hand slides down Jensen’s stomach, palms at his dick through the thin hospital pants. “You ready?” he says, soft, and Jensen nods, fast. He’s so much cooler than Jared is--always calm, in control--except like this, with Jeff, and it just makes Jared’s dick throb, every time. Jared watches while Jeff undoes the drawstring on the pants, while he pushes them down along with the white boxers, and Jensen’s dick spills out, heavy and thick, dragging against the wood rail. Jeff gathers it up in a big hand, squeezes, and Jensen groans, loud enough that he covers his mouth with his own hand. “That’s right,” Jeff says, grinning big again, but then he’s probing at Jensen’s ass with his other hand, not asking, and Jensen props his hands on the pool table, his shoulders high and his head dropping, the line of his back curving down to where Jeff’s fingers are inside him.

It’s Jeff who groans, though, unexpected. “Oh, sweetheart,” he says, and Jensen smiles, eyes closed, tipping up his hips. “When did you manage that?”

“That break for the blown light,” Jensen says, and it’s quiet but it’s cocky. “Knew you’d want to take lunch. Was I right?”

Jeff kisses the back of his neck, his shoulder, says, “So right,” sounding almost dumb, and he’s fumbling his jeans open, drawing out his dick and pumping it, dark in the space between them, before Jared finally puts together--Jensen lubed himself up. On set. In costume, in a break between scenes. Jared feels his face go bright red, the heat searing up in his cheeks and throat, and he has to get a hand on his crotch, squeezing through his jeans, because--because that meant that when Jared was playing a quick match of Soul Calibur in his trailer, in the trailer next door Jensen was spreading his legs, getting his fingers wet, pushing--in---

A groan, two--Jeff, lining up, shoving inside. It’s fast, and Jensen’s rocked up against the table with the force. “God,” Jeff says, and gets his hands around Jensen’s bare hips. “You’re perfect.”

“So I’ve heard,” Jensen says, and braces his hands better, backs up, makes the angle better. His mouth opens, his back arching. “Ah--Jeff, come on--”

Jeff obeys. They always fuck hard, after all the teasing--no slow corkscrewing thrusts, no pausing. Every time Jared’s seen, the same. Jensen likes it, shoves back into it, wants it deep, fast, and his dick’s heavy and slapping against his thigh now, his shoulderblades popped out from how he’s bracing against the table, giving as good as he’s getting against the force of Jeff’s hips. Jeff holds him tight, rams him strong and good and steady, and Jared--he’s fucked a girlfriend in the ass, a few times, but they’ve always been doing him a favor and he’s given up on it because they clearly didn’t love it, and so--he has an idea of what it’s like, but he’s never had that. Never someone like Jensen, who clearly loves it, hard and flushed, throwing his head back at how good it feels, wanting it bad enough that he’s lubing himself up on a break and fucking at work--

“Jesus,” Jeff spits, “for fuck’s sake, Jen, I’m--” and shit, he’s close already--Jensen groans, goes down to his elbows on the table, and Jeff grips him tighter, shoves into him even harder, faster, chasing it, and Jared watches Jensen’s face the whole time and sees the tight turned-on ripple of pleasure when Jeff shoves up into him and groans, flexing, dumping inside him. Fuck’s sake is right--Jeff shoves in again, reflex, and Jensen’s mouth falls open, like it’s the hottest thing that’s happened to him in years.

Jeff folds over for a few seconds, forehead against Jensen’s back. “Lord in heaven,” he mumbles, and Jensen laughs breathlessly. Jeff pulls out slow, makes Jensen shudder--says, quiet, “Creamed you up, sweetheart,” and Jensen’s face spasms, and Jeff smiles like he knows--and then he spins Jensen around by the hips, kisses him on the mouth, and sinks down to his knees. Jared can see just enough above the corner of the pool table to see Jeff suck Jensen’s dick down at the same time that he burrows three fingers right into his open wet ass--and Jensen shoves his knuckles into his mouth, half-shouts fuck around them anyway, and it’s not long then, a handful of seconds with Jeff clearly working magic and Jensen caught between his mouth and his hand, before Jensen grips Jeff’s shoulder and goes stiff and comes nearly silently, aside from his heaving breath.

Jeff swallows. Jared breathes shaky, against wood. He never saw that before. Jeff swallows, and keeps rocking his fingers into Jensen’s ass even when he pulls back and let his dick fall wet and heavy from his mouth. “How was that, sweetheart?” he says, smiling and smug, and Jensen shakes his head, laughs, soft and shaky. His shoulders gleam with sweat in the dim light.

Jared’s hard enough that he feels like he’s going to pierce a hole through Sam’s jeans. He’s got to get out of here, got to find a quiet place to jerk off with this new image fresh and hot behind his eyes. Jeff finally drags his fingers out, pats Jensen’s ass. “That’s a wrap, champ,” he says, hearty as a little league coach. He stands up, does up his jeans, and when he looks up from that his head turns, and he looks Jared directly in the eye.

[bangchanshehe]

Handsome Disaster pt. 15

When the school bad boy and womanizer Hoseok turns his attention on you it’s hard to ignore. Especially with your best friends being in a relationship and living five doors down from each other.

word count: 3.5k

It had been a solid week of hell since you had broken up with Hoseok and life felt like it couldn’t get much worse. The school had granted you medical absences since the incident to stay at home and rest and you were thankful for their understanding and help, but only for all of the wrong reasons. This whole week you managed to dodge Hosoek at every opportunity that he tried to make his presence known. And god damn it, it was fucking hard.

He tried beating down your door, calling you and texting you all the time and even harassing SeRa to get into contact with you on his behalf. You knew that it was hurting him to separate from you and it was killing him inside, but it was even harder for you. Serval times you wanted to knock on his door or even open up the windows to see him outside but the constant news coverage of the innocent murdered family kept you at home. Trapped inside with your shame, guilt and pain.

Life couldn’t just go back to normal after such a huge change and emotionally draining trauma. Hell, just wiping your ass was hard enough with healing ribs. you couldn’t even imagine actually living life the same anymore. And although you were a little sickened by the thought of it but the who incident taught you to be thankful for what you had and you learned that you couldn’t trust anyone.

At the end of the day it was only you who suffered in your pain. So it was justified that you were alone to deal with it.

The knocking at the door pulled you out of your trance and you looked to see SeRa standing in your door frame with the door just cracked open enough for her to see you. she smiled sympathetically to you when she realized the she had gotten your attention

“hey” she whispered “what are you doing?”

You cracked a small smile at her and shook your head

She pushed her way into your room from the small crack and made her way next to your bed and sat down next to you so she could talk with you. “Are you nervous about going back tomorrow?” she asked gauging your reaction.

You sighed and closed your eyes for a moment. Shit. You thought to yourself. You had almost completely forgotten that you had to go back to school. You didn’t know how to answer her question because you didn’t know how you felt about it.  Were you ready? Could you handle the stares? Or possibly running into someone that you didn’t want to see?

You rolled your head to the side and looked at her with pursed lips. “I guess so. I just know that things are going to be awkward and weird for a while” you answered softly.

She just hummed in agreement ad dropped her gaze apologetically. She knew more than anyone else In this world that you would take the next few days in stride but knew that they would deeply terrify and hurt you.

“and what about Hoseok?” she asked softly still refusing to see you eye to eye.

You sighed again and she raised her head to gauge your reaction. You shook your head softly and remained silent. You hadn’t told her yet that you had dropped the class that you had with him, because she was too soft hearted and would tell Hosoek. And you loved her for her honesty but right now honesty wasn’t what was for the best.

“look… I know that you don’t really want to entice Hoseok right now or get his hopes up for anything.” She started and when you met her gaze her confidence fell a little. You could see it in her eyes “and I know that you probably don’t want to hear this right now, but he’s been acting really out of character and rough ever since he last saw you at the hospital.” She let her gaze wonder over to your phone “maybe you should consider talking to him just for a little to calm him down some.” She offered

You took a moment to let her words sink in and your heart fell a little hearing that Hoseok was going through a rough time, but it wasn’t a good time for you to contact him.

“maybe later” you said quietly, and politely turning down her offer

She nodded her head In understanding “im gonna go take a shower and go to bed, goodnight.” She said slowly getting up and walking away

You didn’t say anything back to her and instead let your minds wonder over Hoseok. What did she mean by he was acting out of character or rough? Hoseok was already pretty rough in other people’s eyes. So what constituted as rough?

You laid down on your bed as you were fully clothed and shut your eyes willing for your thoughts to silence and melt away, hoping that sleep would make things a little more bearable for the time being.

  The next morning you rolled out of bed at the sound of your alarm going off and slowly sauntered to your bathroom. You washed your face and brushed your teeth but did nothing else. You didn’t care how you looked or how other people saw you. they were already going to be talking about what happened and staring at you so why give a single damn about how they saw you? you made a cup of coffee and slid on flip flops before making your way across campus to your first class.

It was distracting seeing how many people were looking at you. Or were they? You couldn’t really tell and that’s what drove you even more insane. You didn’t know if people’s stares were genuine or if you saw them looking by chance. But the small voice in the back of your head was sure that they were all judging you. so you quickly walked with your head hung low from class to class hoping that the fascination and paranoia would die down.

But sadly all you could do was scan the crowds for Shownu and Hoseok hoping that you wouldn’t by chance see or run into either of them. It was stupid to have the paranoia that you would run into Shownu but you still had the creeping feeling that he was somewhere watching you as you moved around.  

Should you try to transfer schools? Or maybe move to another apartment once the lease is up?

You were happy and enjoyed going to school and being where you were, but with the overwhelming anxiety that someone was constantly looking at you over your shoulder you couldn’t get comfortable like you were once before. And things could never go back to how they once were.

You got to your final class and you picked a desk in the back of the lecture hall. Half of the year was already over and being a transfer student into a new lecture made seating slim pickings. You unpacked your spiral and made yourself comfortable in your desk and tried to keep yourself from making too much noise or sticking out.  The professor entered with a steaming cup of tea and a content look on his face while he mindlessly greeted the class and began to start the lecture.  

You took notes and tried your hardest to focus on what was being said but even as you wrote down note for note on the board and stared at the pictures in the text book your mind was still wondering to everything but the lecture. You let out a soft sigh and put your head down over your arms at your desk. There was no use of trying to learn anything right now. You were about to doze off into sleep when the sounds of the lecture doors being loudly pulled on made you peek up from your arms in shock and anxiety. Whoever was pulling on the doors continued to pull as hard as they could as if they were trying to get in to save their life.

The professor paused the lecture, looked at the students in shock and worry and then slowly walked to the doors to open one for the person standing outside. The door flew open and Hoseok pushed his way inside past the professor making everyone gasp in surprise. You were angry and startled to see him there in front of you so livid and anxious that he would push the professor out of his way like that.

How did he even find you? You didn’t tell sera which class you had transferred to so she couldn’t tell him, which means he had to have followed you here.

Your face hardened as you looked at him as he scanned the crowed to find you. As soon as he did find you his face softened a little but his eyes seemed sadder than they were before. He ran up the stairs taking two at a time so he could get to you quicker, and you began to pack your bag in a hurry so you could take the back exit and avoid Hoseok. But he was quicker.

He slammed his hand down on top of your back pack as you were about to rise out of your chair and you yelped in surprise. You turned your head to see him and slowly sat back down keeping your eyes on him the whole time.

“Excuse me sir! This a lecture hall and most certainly not the place for you to be doing this! Get out of my class room!” the professor yelled through clenched teeth

But Hoseok paid him no mind and stood over you while his eyes scanned your body. You felt exhausted and tore your eyes away from him and looked away trying not to make a scene in front of everyone who you just met today.

“Hoseok…. Can you please not do this?”  You begged him with a tiny whisper hoping that only he heard it

“All you had to do was send one message, make one call, or step outside to tell me to fuck off so I could know that you were okay and you were alive.” Hoseok’s voice began to quiver and he squatted down in front of you. “Are you okay?” he asked trying to reach out to cup your face in his palm.

You avoided his palm by swatting it away and let out a sigh “that’s none of your business Hoseok”

Hoseok swallowed and looked away at your response “I know that, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t still care about you. “

Your head raised to look him in the eyes and your heart broke when you witnessed a tear roll down the side of his face. Your heart was yelling at you to reach out and run your hand through his hair or for you wipe his tear away, but you knew it wouldn’t be right.

Hoseok looked up and saw how soft your eyes had become and saw the hope in them. He moved a little closer to you and rose up to your desk “Please! Why are we still doing this? I love you so much and would do everything for you. I know you still love me too so why are you separating us?” he asked with a broken voice

You huffed out air as your heart strings were being tugged on. The answer that he wanted wasn’t going to come out of your mouth. And certainly not in the middle of your lecture hall. If you and Hoseok were going to ever have this conversation it would be somewhere were the two of you could actually talk.

You raised your head to see your professor impatiently waiting with his hands on his hips and a foot out forward and you bowed your head to him as you said “I’m sorry, but I have to leave”

You avoided Hoseok as he climbed up beside you and followed you out the doors like a puppy. He held onto you and paid no mind as to what direction you were walking in. He wrapped his arm around you and tried to kiss you and you quickly wrenched away from him

“What the fuck are you doing?” you yelled at him.

Hoseok stood with him mouth open like a fish as he tried to search for any answer that seemed to fit “I thought that we….”

“No Hoseok, no! I’m alive okay! I want to be left alone and certainly don’t want you disturbing my life as I try to move on from what happened.” You yelled back

Hoseok’s face scrunched up and he quietly whispered “I didn’t mean to disturb you”

“Well you have! It was my first fucking day back and all I wanted was to be treated like normal and be able to pick up where things left off. But you had to barge into my lecture and embarrass me in front of the whole god damn class.”

“I didn’t mean to im so-“ Hoseok apologized

“Just fuck off Hoseok!” you yelled over him and walked away.

  When you finally got home you crashed in bed and allowed for your tears to fall. Why had you been so mean to Hoseok and why did it bother you so much that he cared for you? it was childish for you to yell at him the way that you did, but you knew that if you allowed for him to touch you that you would give into him and things would be exactly the way that they once were. And right now you still weren’t mentally ready to be in a relationship with anyone.

You allowed yourself to cry over it any lots of other things. And you just cried and cried until you had nothing else left to cry about. You needed to have a moment to allow yourself to let everything off of your chest. It wasn’t until SeRa got home that you had realized what time it was and how long you had actually been crying. Like clockwork she came home at 5 pm and made the two of you dinner and as soon as she was done she came quietly knocking on your door.

“Are you hungry?” she asked from the other side.

You didn’t answer her but instead got out of bed and walked to open up the door. You nodded your head to her and she smiled and turned around to go back to the kitchen to make a plate for you.

You took a seat on the couch and the two of you ate there like you always did, watching some cheesy or horrible reality show as you ate your dinner together.

“So how was school?” she asked you

“Do you really not know anything?” you asked her

She sighed “I do, but I want for you to be the one to tell me about what happened”

You took another bite of your food before you put your fork down and told her about everything that had happened. How you felt embarrassed, but it broke your heart to see him and you wanted to hold him but had the voice in your head telling you it was wrong. Everything.

“It seems like despite everything you still really love him.” she pointed out

You nodded your head but didn’t actually look her in the eyes. For some reason it felt so secretive to actually admit out loud and you had no idea why. “But I was such a bitch to him today there’s no way he would actually forgive me for what I did”

“If I know anything about Hoseok it’s that he’s completely in love with you.” SeRa said making sure that you heard her every word loud and clear. “I think ruling out that he doesn’t have the same feelings after today would be a mistake.” She let you think on it for a moment before she continued “Look if you really feel bad about it then why don’t you come out tonight? Hoseok has a match and I’m sure he would love to see you there cheering him on”

“I’m not ready yet to go back there” you confessed “maybe next time I’ll be a little bit better”

Sera nodded her head and patted you on the leg, “okay, then do you want me to tell Hoseok that you want to talk to him?” she asked with raised brows and a smile, hoping that you would say yes.

“no, no ill tell him myself” you said, your heart pounding in your chest just thinking about what you would say to him once you actually got face to face with him again. At the most you did need to apologize to him

“okay well then I’m gonna go get dressed and head out so that way I can see Minhyukie before I go.” Sera said hopping off of the couch and skipping off to her room.

You focused back on your half eaten food and the tv playing some cheesy drama Sera loves to watch. You picked at your plate as you mindlessly thought through what sera had told you. You did still love him very much and it hurt you to see him so put down by what you said to him. But a large part of you  did still really feel like going back to your relationship was not a good idea. It was just too soon and so much chaos made little things even more complicated and you didn’t want to deal with it. You had already received so much attention for being in a relationship with Hoseok and having to fight off all of the girls who had slept with him or either wanted to. And with the negative attention from shownu and then eventually the chaos that came with him, attention was the last thing that you wanted.

“Ill see you later! Don’t forget to lock up tonight!” Sera said almost running out of the door to see Minhyuk

You half laughed at her and watched as she crossed the street and got up to close the door. You had an itch to follow her just down the small path that led to the boys’ house but you talked yourself down from doing it. So you turned around, locked the door and sighed when you finally addressed the new silence in the apartment.

You cleaned the kitchen, did a load of laundry, caught up on late homework and did your best to distract yourself from thoughts that would get you down. There was a small voice in your head that worried if Hoseok was okay after his match. Surely he hadn’t been hit or hurt, but you still wanted the peace of mind of knowing that everything was okay.

You were about to turn off the lights when you heard a knock at the front door. Your heart skipped a beat and you immediately ran to check the peep hole. You saw sera and Minhyuk on the other side and stepped back from the door confused as to why they were back here. You slowly opened the door and stepped out of the way to let them in.

“hey y/n” Minhyuk said with a small smile and waving his hand “I’m gonna go” he said pointing towards Sera’s room, facing her as if he was trying to escape the room.

You turned to face her and you raised an eyebrow “why are you guys here?” you asked her

She dropped her head and bit her lip as if she was trying to find the right words to say. “I don’t think that you should rush into things right now with Hoseok. Give yourself some time to really think about how you feel and then maybe try again with him” she suggested but it didn’t sound quite right

“why? What? What do you mean? You just told me to go to the fight and now you think I should wait?” you asked her searching for her eyes, but she dodged your gaze every chance she got. It took you a moment to digest that something might have actually happened and then you finally asked her “did something happen?”

Sera looked up for a split second before she lowered her gaze again. “Hoseok….” She paused and shut her eyes “He went home with someone tonight”

It took you a split second for you to mentally register what she had said and then your jaw dropped. A tear rushed to your eyes and you turned your head to hide them. “he took someone home?” you asked wanting an answer that you knew wasn’t the truth

“im sorry” sera said as she reached for you to comfort you “but I think Hoseok might be back to his old ways”

NEXT PART

[miraculouskpop]

MKP Series | Ladybug and Wolf

Chapter III: This isn't a Story.

Oh Sehun was quite the interesting character for a teenager. Quiet, calculating the objectives laid before him and taking haste action. Perhaps his actions are a little too immediate for understanding, but his intelligent excuses makes up for irrational decisions. His thoughts aren't too immature, at least he thinks so himself, and new talents keeps appearing whenever he learns a new subject. He’s smart, naturally attractive (although he could improve his skin tone…) and carry silent charm that woos both students and teachers.

Yeah, he’s everything losers want to be. So what? Like he gives a shit. Girls love him, boys want to be his posers and teachers ready to place him in honors class. It’s the sweet life, right? Perhaps. He doesn't consider it as sweet, but it’s a hell lot better than dealing with this shit.

This was an incredible case of stupidity. 

Yes, he admit that he made a terrible decision. It’s burning his ass every single day whenever snobs laughs at his failures. People assume he’s some quiet moron sulking through humiliation, hah! They don't know a genius when they see one…

“We meet again tomorrow at four. In the meantime, maintain the training and we’ll overview your new diet plan.” Diet plan. Cut this, remove that, reduce this amount and add more repulsive garbage to his digestive system. Four months in and Sehun is ready to succumb to his bubble tea cravings. It's horrible having sugar withdrawals and being restricted from eating bungeoppang, it’s living hell. Wanna know what else is horrible? Everyone treating him like some stranger. 

He’s not a stranger. 

Sehun left the studio with no one to accompany him. Oddly, this pang sat within his chest for days now. This feeling of deep loneliness, although it’s something he’ll never speak of publicly. Unfortunate to say, but he missed those ugly boys fawning over him, the girls constantly annoying him with cellphone requests. Sehun had to transfer to another school in order to reach distance between the dormitory and that cursed entertainment building.

Those bastards.

But it was him alone who signed the final line. Your fault. His mind whispers, and Sehun realized that he probably deserved it. He didn't know anyone, and it seems that nobody's interested in knowing him either. Maybe they all joined for one purpose, and that’s attaining SM’s official status as celebrity. 

Sehun walked briskly into the midnight hour. He didn’t want to be bothered with anyone, let alone deal with the summer heat radiating against his skin. He knew signing the contract would lead to rigorous training and mental stability, but he vowed he could do it. He can do anything if he just believed, right? If only his current actions would reflect the hopeful notion that he’ll succeed. But it really doesn’t matter, anyway. 

The teen stood at the stop light waiting for the electric sign to flash green. Sehun preoccupied himself by scrolling naver on mobile ((slow internet due to pissy coverage)) and played some hip hop music. The moment the light flashed green, Sehun pushed past the crowd. However, what Sehun didn’t realize he legitimately pushed someone, particularly an old man, onto the ground. Sehun froze in surprise, “I’m sorry sir. Are you okay?” He felt embarrassed and somewhat guilty to for not paying attention. Sehun bend his knees to help the old man, and then notice how short the elder was. The old man simply chuckled as he carefully grabbed his cane. “I’m quite fine,” he said, “Getting rather old for these late travels... Thank you young man for helping me. What’s your name, child?”

“Uh, Sehun. Oh Sehun.” It felt strange talking to an old man in the middle of the street. “Well then, Oh Sehun, would you like to attain a gift far superior than physical needs?”

Uh… 

Sehun stared blankly at the old man. What the hell is this guy talking about? “Um, not really-“

“I understand your hurting deeply. Your depression outweighs your confidence, and sometimes it is hard concealing sorrowful emotions.” Sehun immediately lunged on defense. How dare this ignorant old goon tell him that he’s depressed! He is not depressed! In fact, he’s doing a hell lot better than normal! This ridiculous pruned nutbag. “Excuse me, but I need to leave-“

“If you had the opportunity to become a hero, would you accept?” 

“Sure, yeah, whatever. I gotta go now. Bye.” Ugh, this man is giving him the creeps. Sehun raced across the street before the light turned red. He couldn't help but to shudder at the strange circumstance. What was that all about? Talk about weird. When he finally made it to the moderately fair dormitory, Sehun could feel his insides churn in distress. After abandoning his friends for his current lifestyle, he haven't met anyone rather interesting. No one bothers to talk to him, and his previous friends are too preoccupied with school clubs and other friends. 

Okay, it hurts. It’s nobody's fault but his own. Sehun released a dreary sigh before punching in the codes to the entrance. Better take a shower and go to sleep…

He made it up the stairs and unlocked the door. It’s considered a small officetel to some, and thankfully he doesn’t have to deal with crooks stealing his stuff. Darkness swallowed Sehun whole, yet he felt emptier than ever before. He trekked through the living room and into the bathroom, took a hot shower, changed into his pajamas and returned to the tiny space for a kitchen. He then ate a small bowl of whole wheat cereal and slices of an apple. Oh, how he missed sugar cereal…

Sehun walked to his bed and prepared to sleep when he found a box resting idly against his pillow. Huh? He doesn't recall a box. The teenager snatched it, opened the box and found an intricate metal watch inside. Hm, looks very nice. He pulled the watch out the box and inspected it. Tiny white paw marks trailed the edges of watch. In the center there was a symbolic white wolf with the hand formed as a silver paw. Behind the wolf was a full moon, and Sehun found it rather unusual for a watch, but nonetheless liked the design. 

Looks cool. Sehun slipped his wrist between the hooks and grinned. Wondered who would give him this? It fits his wrists perfectly…

There was a small click, and then a flash of bright light.

Sehun winced when the light began to fade. Like, what the heck just happened? The teen shook his head, and noticed something rather… Different. Different in what way? Well, there’s something floating in front of him. 

. . .

… What the absolute fuc-

“Excuse me, but if you’re planning to swear, please reconsider it.” That thing said. Holy hell, did it just spoke? What the hell is this? Sehun immediately back away in horror. He blinked, and blinked again. Hell, he even rubbed his eyes to ensure he wasn't seeing things. However, that floating thing was still there! “What the hell are you?!” Fear drowned out his senses as he continued moving away from the thing. Hair stood above Sehun’s neck when the thing flew towards him.

“Don’t hurt me!" Sehun covered himself in case the thing decided to possess him. 

Nothing. 

Sehun peeked to find the thing directly facing him. By its expression it seemed unamused, and its arms folded in a rather irritable fashion. “Cut the hogwash. You are the new miraculous holder, and I’m your guardian. The name is Apollo, by the way.” H-huh? Sehun looked at the thing in confusion. Wait. Thing isn't the correct word, but rather wolf. 

Is he, Oh Sehun, listening to a floating bobbleheaded wolf? “I must be crazy.” He whispered.

“Crazy? Hm, perhaps. But this situation is nowhere near insane. I am very much real, and your conscious is simply denying my presence, but don't worry, it’ll become accustomed very quickly.” “Apollo” said. 

No, no, this not real… It can't be! “Oh child, don't you know it’ll only make the circumstances more difficult? Just accept things as they are.”

“I… But…- you’re not real!” 

Apollo tilted its (his?) head, “Oh?” Its voice was deep for a tiny creature. “You are responding to me, so this only proves my statement. This is reality now, and your brain can easily process the situation if you only accept it.”

“What the hell are you?” Sehun sneered at the creature. Grey fur covered its entire body, leaving silver tufts by the edge of his jagged ears. Bright topaz for eyes, Apollo gazed at him, “I am a kwami. Specifically speaking, I am a seven thousand year old god inhibiting the body of a Eurasian canis lupis. Or wolf, if that would be simpler for you.”

“Why-“

“I’m assuming you're inquiring why I am here? Well, I honestly have no opinion. Fate destined us, and since I’m your new guardian I must teach you the ways of being an efficient miraculous holder. I am the god of protection, mobility and wisdom. I am the Alpha and the Omega, and I will guide you for where you need to be.”

Sehun grew confused, “What?” He didn’t understand any of this. A wolf god mention about destiny and guardian junk, none of it makes sense! “Miraculous holders are people inheriting a magical jewelry piece. We kwamis fuel the jewelry piece with our powers which gives the miraculous holders their own special abilities.” Abilities you say? A spark of interest captured Sehun. He didn’t understand the process whatsoever, but having special powers brought out the inner fantasy child within him. “So, if I accept you, then you’ll train me to become a skilled superhero?” Just imagine not only being a professional dancer, but an attractive badass superhero fighting crime with girls wetting their underwear every damn second.

… Omit the underwear part.

“Hm, exactly.”

“Okay, deal.” This is so… So freaking amazing. “So, uh, what now?” He already accepted this errm, kwami wolf, so it does it mean he already have magical powers? “If possible, may we properly discuss this over some tea?”

… Tea? “You drink tea?” Sehun asked in bewilderment.

“Oh yes, and I would gladly consume a bowl of tofu.” Tofu? When did a carnivorous mammal ever desire tea and tofu? “Okay… I don't have any tofu, but I do have tea. Is green tea fine?”

Apollo smiled, “Perfectly.”

And so, here Sehun sat at the table with a tiny wolf creature sipping away at some tea. “This watch is considered a miraculous, right?”

“Exactly. It represents the abilities of wolves, and might alter your own perception. You see, previous miraculous holders happened to release their inner “wolf” when paired with me. Not only does your physical appearance change, but your mental state as well.”

Sehun narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “What do you by mental state?” He doesn’t want to become a literal werewolf pissing and shitting all over people. Apollo held up a paw, “No need to worry, it’s nothing of what you would perceive. Your regular human senses would be heightened by the third cubed. I suggest when transforming to practice managing the senses before anything else, afterwards I'll train how to conduct yourself when fighting.”

“Do I defeat bad guys?”

“With this brewing evil I detect, you'll be battling more than akumas alone...” Apollo then lapped up some more green tea. Sehun had many questions to ask the kwami starting with these quote, “akumas”. What where they exactly? “To simplify your questions, an evil human decided to manipulate and abuse one of the kwamis. Keeping this in mind, the miraculous holder is abusing the butterfly kwami who can bestow any human being supernatural abilities. Since it’s manipulated into negative energy, these powered beings are titled akumas.” Akuma, huh? Sounds interesting to fight. “What powers do I get? Do I become awesome with badass weapons? Or like, I have psychic abilities and-“

“Relax yourself Sehun,” 

Wait.

How do this wolf know his name? He doesn't recall giving out personal information. “Yes Sehun, when I awoke from my slumber I already knew my wielder’s name. It’s the first step to creating an intimate bond.”

… Oh. 

Sehun slumped in the chair. Thousands of thoughts attacked his mind relentlessly, and it begged the question. Why him? What does he have to offer? Looks? “Why am I chosen? I mean, like, it’s not like I wanted to deliberately help people. I’m not exactly superhero material…” More likely anti-hero because it’s sound way more cooler. Apollo looked at Sehun with a sarcastic, “are you serious?” Look. “I honestly have no conclusion. But you’re selected to become a miraculous wielder. Regardless, would you like to try out your abilities for testing?”

“Hell yeah! " Sehun shouted, then he quickly resolved himself. “I mean, sure, I’ll try.” Guess he can miss a night of sleep for this. “You have to state my name, then the term, “howl shift,” and-“

“Apollo, howl shift!”

“Wait! I’m not finished-!“ Apollo couldn’t complete his sentence for he was sucked into the watch.

[racingtoaredlight]

THE DEGENERATE’S GUIDE TO COLLEGE FOOTBALL TV WATCH ‘EM UPS 2021: WEEK ONE, TIME FOR THE GOOD STUFF

This is by far the best “opening” slate of games we’ve had in at least a couple of decades. The great thing about having a bunch of cross-country, inter-conference, top 25 matchups in the first week of the season is that we’ll all have a clear expectation of every team involved and will mostly have those ideas flipped over by the end of the month. Answers to questions but wrong, you know?

That’s ok because, really, the whole college football season is that same cycle over and over. And we love it, don’t we folks? We love it more than dying unfulfilled and for no reason with nothing at all to show for it in the larger scheme of the world. College football is a metaphor for life which is just an elaborate metaphor for college football.

Blah, blah eastern times and websites. There have already been approximately one million games played this week with a few FCS over FBS upsets and, upsettingly enough, Kansas was not one of the losers. Whooooooooo! Let’s get it on!

Saturday, September 4

Fordham at Nebraska   12:00pm   BTN

Fordham +46.5 might be the safest bet you can make this week.

ULM at Kentucky 12:00pm SECN

What can you say about Kentucky being favored by 31 over anybody except that it seems incredibly overconfident. They aren’t ranked in the top 10 so I assume they either skip Bama this year or don’t play them until October.

Temple at Rutgers    12:00pm  BTN

In real time the scheduling is fine but these first handful of games feel like a punishment for me crowing about the general quality of this week’s matchups.

Tulane at 2 Oklahoma  12:00pm  ABC

These are the games that come back to win Heisman trophies for Oklahoma QBs later in the year. If the Sooners don’t beat the spread (-31.5) they probably shouldn’t keep their ranking next week.

Holy Cross at UConn  12:00pm  CBSSN

If you can still get UConn -4 anywhere don’t. Holy hell that’s bleak. 4-points at home against Holy Cross. It’s getting real close to time to turn the lights off on the Huskies football program.

Colgate at Boston College  12:00pm  ACCN

If the Toothpastes can just score more than 7 they will have outperformed expectations. If they score more than 7 and hold BC under 60 they will likely have beaten the spread. Chomp ‘Em, Colgate! (I don’t think that’s really their motto but it should be.)

Western Michigan at Michigan  12:00pm  ESPN

I could’ve sworn Michigan played last week and lost but maybe I’m just used to that.

Stanford vs. Kansas State (in Arlington, TX)  12:00pm  FS1

There have been times over the last 25 years where this would be a matchup befitting of a premium neutral site but this is not even close to being one of those years. Definitely not in week one, at least.

19 Penn State at 12 Wisconsin  12:00pm  FOX

Nobody will ever make it make sense that Penn State still has a football program, let alone a football program that puts some of the best athletes into the NFL year after year in a post-Sandusky world.

Army at Georgia State  12:00pm  ESPNU

I can’t be the only one that thinks if the troops put together a football team with the best training and facilities available they’d still get their asses handed to them week after week like they do in illegal wars of aggression.

Fresno State at 11 Oregon  2:00pm   P12N

Kayvon Thibideaux didn’t make the list of “freaks” this year in the Athletic and I can’t tell if I’m just wildly overrating his abilities or if there was some weird oversight due to him announcing that he’ll be playing more standing up on the outside than with a hand in the dirt. Anyway, he’s fun to watch when he’s just pinning his ears back and rushing the QB and Fresno State throws a lot so this could be worth a few minutes of entertainment in this weird in-between time slot. Though, be warned, early kickoff Pac-12 games do tend to suck.

Lafayette at Air Force  2:00pm Stadium

Air Force favored by 42.5. You don’t see that often.

Rice at Arkansas  2:00pm  ESPN+/SECN+

A beautiful reminder of the old SWC. Nothing else. And that’s probably not enough reason to watch this. Arkansas is probably pretty bad but I have trouble believing Rice is going to keep it within 20 of anybody on the road.

17 Indiana at 18 Iowa  3:30pm  BTN

B1G’s plan is to prime the polls early so their teams seem better later on. I’m not falling for it. These are two shit teams that will only look good within the context of the B1G.

14 Miami (FL) vs. 1 Alabama (in Atlanta, GA)  3:30pm   ABC

Miami’s starters are about as old as an average NFL team’s and they’re still gonna get run over by the Bammers. The Canes do actually have a decent stock of pro prospects right now but a lot of these guys were on the field against UNC last year watching as the Tar Heels put up 3,492 rushing yards. So it’s a bunch of middle aged mid-round prospects against a shiny new crop of future stars. Bama should just get an auto-bid for the playoffs at this point until they prove they don’t belong anymore. I’m calling it now: it’s fine, I had a bunch of chores to do around the house anyway.

Marshall at Navy   3:30pm  CBSSN

Ah, the AAC. So dear to my heart. I hated everything Navy did last year but last year was a mulligan anyway. This year might be, too, in the end but for now we can pretend it’ll go off without a hitch.

Miami (Ohio) at 8 Cincinnati  3:30pm  ESPN+

The Bearcats are the darling of mainstream coverage if you’re looking for a playoff Cinderella. Which usually means they’ll lose three games in the regular season and won’t even make it to their conference championship.

West Virginia at Maryland  3:30pm  ESPN

Wait, is this a conference game now? A future conference game? I won’t be paying close attention to realignment. This should be a rivalry of some sort but I can’t quite put myself at ease with WFV in the ACC and Maryland will never belong anywhere but the ACC.

UMass at Pitt   4:00pm  ACCN

Pitt being favored by 35.5 feels like a trap.

Louisiana Tech at Mississippi State   4:00pm  ESPNU

LaTech must be sliding backwards as a program judging by the +23 line. I got nothing else here.

Montana State at Wyoming   4:00pm   ESPN+

I’m intrigued by the screaming amateurism that this game projects. I won’t actually watch it but the way it will look like a 4k remaster of a game from the 60s is appealing on a spiritual level.

Central Michigan at Missouri   4:00pm   SECN

Fuck Missouri.

23 Louisiana at 21 Texas   4:30pm   FOX

The line has moved heavily towards the Ragin Cajuns since it opened. Texas is still a solid favorite but there is something here that I have not been paying attention to so if you want to dig a little you might find some relatively easy money.

Northern Iowa at 7 Iowa State  4:30pm  ESPN+

Iowa State, #7 in the preseason. What a weird fucking time we live in.

San Jose State at 15 USC   5:00pm  P12N

Clay Helton is still the coach at USC. That’s crazy. This program has been sleepwalking through the last decade and they’re still able to pull a #15 ranking because they only have one or two teams on their schedule with a relatively equal talent level.

Gardner-Webb at Georgia Southern   6:00pm  ESPN3

Campbell at Liberty   6:00pm   ESPN3

Liberty’s QB is this year’s unheard of draft prospect that every self-styled draft expert/prognosticator on god’s green twitter is touting as a first round pick. I don’t have an opinion on him because I generally feel gross watching Liberty do anything.

Nicholls at Memphis   7:00pm  ESPN+

Go, Tigers, go. I don’t actually have any expectations calibrated for this year’s Memphis squad. I saw Kenneth Gainwell made a 53-man roster for the Eagles and couldn’t remember him being anything other than a freshman. Time is cruel.

Missouri State at Oklahoma State   7:00pm   ESPN+

If Oklahoma State can’t hit for at least 60 in this game they aren’t real and I hate them.

Monmouth at Middle Tennessee   7:00pm  ESPN3

Ah, Monmouth, Monmouth! These chips are too spicy!

Texas Tech vs. Houston (in Houston, TX)  7:00pm   ESPN

The future of the Big 12 is the SWC, as it always should have been. Well, I mean, aside from the SWC’s tentpole programs. Ah, fuck, it’s so weird and stupid.

Syracuse at Ohio   7:00pm   CBSSN

I still love CBSSN but no thank you.

Southern at Troy   7:00pm  ESPN3

Fading fast.

Oregon State at Purdue   7:00pm   FS1

Fading faster.

Norfolk State at Toledo   7:00pm   ESPN3

I’m evaporating.

Central Arkansas at Arkansas State   7:00pm   ESPN3

Eyes are closing.

Eastern Illinois at South Carolina   7:00pm   ESPN+/SECN+

Snoring softly.

Baylor at Texas State   7:00pm   ESPN+

Snapping to just to talk about how evil Baylor is in general, aside from the horrifically cursed athletics department.

Akron at Auburn   7:00pm   ESPN+/SECN+

Back to sleep.

Abilene Christian at SMU   7:00pm  ESPN+

Snoring loudly.

5 Georgia vs. 3 Clemson (in Charlotte, NC)   7:30pm   ABC

Ah, shit, here we go! It is party time! On paper this is an insanely good “opening” week matchup. But this is also the game that I most had in mind when I wrote about how kind of useless this week’s games are for the season going forward. Clemson is in the DJ Uiagalelei era now and even if he’s better long term than I suspect him of being, he’s still bound to be raw against a Georgia team that might actually have more overall talent than Clemson right now. But if he shows out he’ll be an immediate Heisman darling until he starts throwing lawn darts for a few weeks in a row. It’s fun but meaningless.

NIU at Georgia Tech   7:30pm    ACCN

Trash.

Northwestern State at North Texas   7:30pm   ESPN3

Crap.

UTSA at Illinois   7:30pm   BTN

Garbage.

William & Mary at Virginia   7:30pm   RSN/ESPN3

Funny if William & Mary wins but probably just miserable all around.

Florida Atlantic at 13 Florida   7:30pm   SECN

I don’t often fall into the trap of daydreaming about mascots fighting but an owl fighting an alligator is too good to pass up. There are owls of some sort pretty much everywhere in the world so they have to cross paths in nature with a gator every so often. If you have any videos of an owl winning these fights, please share them.

Southern Miss at South Alabama   8:00pm   ESPN+

Hell, yes. I can’t fully explain why this shitbox gets me a little bit excited but it does.

Kent State at 6 Texas A&M   8:00pm   ESPNU

Always root against Jimbo. Don’t always bet against him but definitely always root against him.

Montana at 20 Washington   8:00pm   P12N

Now this is interesting brand building to me. I don’t think there’s much here for UDub other than an expected win but Montana has been a pretty good team in I-AA over the years. If they can run closer than the +24 they’ve been given it could boost their profile quite a bit.

Duquesne at TCU   8:00pm   ESPN+

I’m not falling for this one.

ETSU at Vanderbilt   8:00pm   ESPN+/SECN+

Vanderbilt is a 21-point favorite and I am telling you, gentle reader, that is a mistake.

16 LSU at UCLA   8:30pm   FOX

UCLA hasn’t been a top talent draw on the West Coast in the last 20 years for whatever reason. This is what I meant by USC sleepwalking. It feels like, to me, going to school in Westwood and playing home games in the Rose Bowl would be a bigger draw than University Village and the Coliseum. But maybe being able to walk to games is important to recruits. Whatever, LSU is going to fuck the Bruins up right there in the Rose Bowl so that’s not gonna help anything.

Bethune-Cookman at UTEP   9:00pm   ESPN3

This is as close to a bodybag game as UTEP can get, at least where they’re the favorites, but I will say this for BCU: their uniforms are usually pretty cool.

New Mexico State at San Diego State   10:30pm   CBSSN

This is that real MWC shit. Lovely to me for reasons I have not been and never will be able to articulate.

Arizona vs. BYU (in Las Vegas, NV)  10:30pm   ESPN

This game is Mormon as hell. If you know any Mormon football fans then they probably have an interest in this game. Bless ‘em, nobody else will have an interest but readers of Moroni sure as hell will.

Nevada at California    10:30pm   FS1

Hmm. Maybe. I doubt I can sink much time into it but I do like the overload of different dark shades of blue threads involved here if nothing else.

Utah State at Washington State   11:00pm   P12N

And here we have a ton of red, depending on alternates and whatnot.

Portland State at Hawaii   11:59pm   Spectrum PPV

A historic showcase for the run & shoot but I don’t know what either offense is supposed to be right now.

Sunday, September 5

9 Notre Dame at Florida State   7:30pm   ABC

Notre Dame is only favored by 7. Did FSU get a huge influx of talent that I totally missed or is the line just something nice in honor of Bobby Bowden? From what I know of these two programs from last year, the Irish should be at least a 3 TD overdog. Was Ian Book really all that great? I thought he was a good QB but I am thoroughly confused by what’s driving the odds on this one.

Monday, September 6

Louisville vs. Mississippi (in Atlanta, GA)   8:00pm   ESPN

Yehaw. What a weird way to close things out. Why aren’t the UGas and the Cocaine Tigers playing in this slot? The racist south is favored by 10 but, off the top of my head, I don’t think they’re actually any better than Louisville. Whatever, there’s close to a zero percent chance I even remember this game is happening.

[quakerjoe]

It's been a while since I've written a "Cuppa Joe" sermon, so to speak, and for that I apologize. I've been getting over-saturated by the news and haven't been in the mood. With that, I challenge you to read this. A "Shot of Joe" for the end of February... ----------------------------------------------------- Gun violence. It won’t end in our lifetimes here in the United States. We won’t see the end of it, but perhaps, just maybe our children or grandchildren will see a day when America is once again worthy of seeing themselves as the “Land of the Brave”. Right now, we simply aren’t, and it has a lot to do with the differences we all imagine as the End Game for our futures. Some seem to strive for a sort of Utopian society where we all have health coverage, free education on all levels, clean air and water, safe food, honest, livable wages for all, and a society where it no longer matters what color our flesh is or from where our ancestors come from or what religious backgrounds we have or what sexual preferences or genders we are. We’ll reach an age, with any luck, where we’re all just simply… Americans.

However, while some of us strive for that sort of end game in the US, there are others who crave a time more akin to the post-apocalyptic times seen in Mad Max films or they hope for a zombie apocalypse or some sort of breakdown of society where they can unleash their darkest desires, including crime without fear of punishment like rape and murder, the re-implementation of slavery, and moves to put women back where they “belong”; back in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant and free to beat and slap around for being “uppity”. You know; “Biblical Times”. Praise Jesus, right?

The fact remains that so long as we, as a nation, glorify war and death and murder, all for the selfish sake of owning guns, then we have no business thinking we’re free, because we’re not, and there’s no merit for even remotely considering ourselves brave. Last I checked, there isn’t a nation on the planet who can assemble any kind of army, traverse the massive oceans of the Atlantic or Pacific, reach our shores and invade us. Mexico will never have enough of an army to come close to being a match for our over-bloated military. Canada… They’re simply not interested and that’s not their style since forever as a nation of their own. (They did burn down the White House during the War of 1812, but they were British back then.)

Given the massive natural barriers between us and anyone who could possibly want to do harm to the US, it seems beyond INSANE that our military is so bloody huge. We’re already fairly untouchable, and the world knows it. They, like many of us, know that our military budget is only rivaled by that of the next 15+/- nations COMBINED after us, and all but one are allies. Most of THEM, on the other hand, have amazing health care systems and far better education systems. They invest in their PEOPLE and not corporations. They have better and more modern infrastructure. They’re fighting climate change. They’re not at war with other nations like the US is all around the world. They care for their troops and don’t just talk about it and put bumper stickers on their cars. 

Essentially, Americans are, in general, totally full of shit, mostly empty thoughts, and blasphemous prayers that mean fuck-all nothing. It’s how they cope. What the hell is wrong with Americans? They’re the loudest, mouthiest, and chicken-shit nation there is today. Those in charge use the military as mercenaries for the rich and powerful private sector.  We treat those poor patriots like they’re going off to save the world, but does anyone ever wonder who “wins” in these overseas operations? Who gets the goods in the aftermath? Big Pharma gets poppies from Afghanistan. Big Oil corporations get benefits from constantly destabilizing the Middle East, either through bullshit invasions like in Iraq, or through undercover ops via the CIA and private merc companies. Big. Fat. Rich. Fucks. They are the ones who reap the prizes from war. Our own troops get shot at for the privilege of putting on a uniform and being led to believe that they’re going on some sacred, patriotic crusade for Uncle Same and the country they love. Their prize? They get PTSD, debilitating wounds, lost time away from home, and pretty much fucked over and forgotten in the VA system and there’s never enough money in the Big Military Budget to take care of those who they conned into facing lethal force for a king they don’t know even exists. Their bravery and duty to country is taken advantage of by those who will use them to get more money, either for their own corporations, or from donors who put big wads of cash into a politician’s coffers. We watch on as corporate money bucks taxpayer money and gains control over politicians who USED to work for “We the People”. Too many politicians work for “We, the Corporations” and the rest of us can simply go to hell, plug in to whatever diversion makes you happy, and simply… fuck off. We let politicians go unchecked. Some of us have been screaming warnings about shit like “Citizens United” which essentially has made bribery LEGAL for politicians to receive. When a politician abused his/her power, he was held accountable to “We the Taxpayers” and be ousted in the next vote or thrown out of office through recalls and so forth. Now, politicians are expected to get a return on investment for their rich donors who now get massive tax breaks while the rest of us are being lined up for slaughter because it is easier to rob a million dollars from a million people, one buck at a time, than it is to steal a cool mil from one rich fucker in one go.

The guns… Oh, the guns! It’s a religion in the US. People are simply just that selfish. Knowing FULL WELL that if there were fewer guns, people would be safer, people will NEVER give them up. That would take empathy, consciousness, conscience, and total honesty, not to mention… BRAVERY. I mean, like I mentioned earlier, we’re nowhere NEAR to any danger of being invaded. We already have a method for overthrowing the government; it’s called “SHOW UP AND FUCKING VOTE”. If you don’t like what’s going on, RUN FOR OFFICE. But give up guns? Hell no! Americans are afraid of just about everything, the worst being white dudes. Old ones. Young ones. Generation after generation, they’re bred into fear; fear of everything not white-cist-male-heterosexual and of course “Christian”. Because, you know, Jesus LOVES the AR-15 and I’ve always seen him as a sort of fifty caliber Desert Eagle carrying motherfucker, don’t you? Americans are afraid of each other. They’re afraid, like the Native Americans before them, of immigrants. You see, once you fuck someone over, you get paranoid. You’re afraid that what you did will turn around someday and come to bite you in the ass. Genocide of the Native Population. African Slavery. Religious altercations against non-Christians. Keeping women from being equals at home and in the workplace. Going overseas and shooting up the place so we can rob them of their resources to make the rich even more wealthy. Keeping the LGBTQ community hidden, repressed in the shadows and imprisoned in their closets for fear of being fired, brutally beaten or even tortured and killed. One day, there is that possibility that ALL of that could come together and bit a white man in the ass. The harshest, most brutal parts of American history were all committed by…. Wait for it… WHITE DUDES! It’s why they’re the biggest gun nuts and ammosexuals there are on planet Earth. They know their time of supremacy is coming to an end. Not all of them are on “their side”. There are those, and in ever increasing numbers, who want that Utopian society with all the clean air, food and water, livable, honest wages, and for ALL citizens of our nation to prosper and live decent lives and not have to be homeless and to live in squalor. ALL of us. Americans. Even the shitbags, chicken-shit gun nuts. That’s what being a Liberal and a Progressive means, kids. No more super-rich assholes buying our government for their own self interests. No more abusing our patriotic military to use as cannon fodder for profit. No more shafting rules that deliver justice and that protect and serve “We the People”. We won’t see it. We’ll grow too old, as we work ourselves to death because retirement is no longer an option for survival anymore. We’ll die younger and younger because only those of privilege can afford health care while the safety net programs leave more and more “We the People” out in the cold to starve to death or to die of poor health. We’ll be dead because our water is getting contaminated; our air getting more dangerous to breathe; our food becoming a corporate mob owned operation that’ll have us by the short hairs to keep us all docile and in line. We’re going to die, and not in a nation that’s brave or free. 

The American Dream is just that. It’s time to wake up and decide if we’re going to pursue that dream, or let it all slip away into the nightmares that lie on the horizon because not enough of us are learned enough to see what’s going on. Not enough of us are mobilized to get politically active. That’s part of why keeping us all poor works for the rich and powerful. If we can’t afford to take time off from one of our several jobs needed to survive, we can’t afford to march, protest, or support candidates who want that Utopian End Game. Keeping us stupid, by buying up all the media outlets and only telling us what they want us to know and keeping us divided (divide and conquer; heard of that before?) keeps us from coming together as the “We” in “We the People”. Keeping our children stupid keeps this ball rolling, and shafting the education system repeatedly is well on its way to achieving that. Add to that: School Massacres! As people become more and more afraid of sending their kids to school, what will they do?

Three choices are before them. First, Home Schooling; keeping children stunted and limited in their educational input because face it- parents are not all rocket scientists and parents cannot all teach their children well enough on their own. “It takes a village”, they say, or at least a proper, public school. Second, if you’ve got the coin, there may be private schools and they’re typically religious-based, jamming their religion into you while you’re trying to learn basic math. Lastly, for the growing masses of the not-so-well-to-do, there’s fuck-all nothing. No school. Keep the masses dumb, and let them get into the work force as soon as possible. There’s always the military. We’ve already been warned that the influx of applicants to our armed forces is overrun with the not-so-bright and that it’s a matter of national security because they’re not intelligent enough to do the really important jobs needed in our armed forces. The rich love that shit. Keep the kids fed with “America is the Best!” and “USA! USA! USA!” when they haven’t a fucking clue why they’re saying it. Keep them all armed, because gun deaths maintain the fear the rich and powerful crave. Keep the general population stupid and paranoid and they can rule supreme forever, right? Possibly. We shall see.

~Quaker Joe

[onestowatch]

Kenny Mason Is Aiming to Become the Biggest Artist in the World [Q&A]

Photo: Nasser Boulaich

If you’re a fan of Radiohead and Young Thug, then we have the new project for you. You probably already know about Kenny Mason, whose synthesis of shoegaze, hip-hop and grunge made headlines last year following the release of his debut album Angelic Hoodrat. 

This week, the Atlanta rapper returns to us with Angelic Hoodrat: Supercut, a twelve-track spiritual successor featuring some of the most dynamic and abrasive hip-hop tracks seen this year. Coinciding with its release, fans are also being treated to a visual for Mason’s new track “Much Money” with Freddie Gibbs. 

Angelic Hoodrat: Supercut makes an incredibly strong case for Mason’s spot in the Atlanta hip-hop Hall of Fame. Whether rapping with a steadfast intensity on ethereal cuts like “Fasho” or singing on the genre-breaking “Breathe” with Ambar Lucid, Kenny Mason’s risk-taking performances are consistently at the top of his game. Pulling from a wide range of influences like Princess Loko, Koopsta Knicca, and Tommy Wright III this time around, Angelic Hoodrat: Supercut might be Mason’s boldest project to date.

Mason’s approach frequently resembles a swarm-like onslaught of syllables delivered over an infectiously chaotic mix, with the end result being a masterfully-crafted bout of hard-hitting lyrical genius. If you missed his debut last year, now is the perfect chance to become a fan. Joined by guests like Denzel Curry and Freddie Gibbs, Mason’s Angelic Hoodrat Supercut is not a project to mix.

Prior to the release of Angelic Hoodrat: Supercut, I was fortunate enough to sit down and talk with Kenny Mason. We discussed our love of live shows, the insane past year he’s had, and everything in between.

Ones To Watch: This week you’re giving fans 12 new tracks, but the album is called Angelic Hoodrat: Supercut. What relationship do you feel this new record has with the one you released a year ago? 

Kenny Mason:  A lot of the songs on this record we made during the sessions of the last album, so they have the same energy. It’s not that these were the ones I didn’t pick, I knew that we were going to do a deluxe, but we kept making songs throughout the pandemic. So it was like, “I like all of these, even the new ones, and the ones with features on them. We’re just going to do a whole Supercut and make it separate,” because stylistically I don’t really like having a 30 song tracklist. But it is truly a deluxe, just separated. 

I’m glad that you brought up features, because this time around you host a wide range of guests–Denzel Curry, Freddie Gibbs, Ambar Lucid, Angel White. What was the creative process like making this record, especially when it came down to the collaboration. 

Ambar Lucid came to Atlanta for a minute, I met her and she worked on the song. Angel was in the studio with me too, me and Angel have been friends for a minute, and I’ve always really liked his music. Their features were more in-person, but Denzel... he’s been fucking with me, so I already knew that I wanted to have a song with him. People had been asking about it, but I originally released “A+” on YouTube. Everybody was kicking my ass about it not being on streaming, so that was the last song where I was like “Oh this has to be on the deluxe, because people are going to be upset.” Freddie Gibbs came out of nowhere, my manager sent my song to him just to show him–I don’t even know if it was intended for him to get on the song–but bro got on it. Freddie Gibbs is one of my favorite rappers so that shit sent me! 

In collaborating with Freddie Gibbs you’ve had a pretty insane year. In some of the press you got around the time of Angelic Hoodrat’s release, you mentioned that the ‘Angelic’ denoted your desire to make music for the people who needed it, and ‘Hoodrat’ meant wanting to be big, wanting to be a star while still being yourself. With this year being so fucking weird, do you feel any of that has changed?

My purpose definitely has not changed. Regardless of my success, or what people project my “success” to be, I’m still going to make music and it’s always going to be therapeutic for me. In turn, I believe this is what makes it therapeutic for other folks. I think it’s always going to be that way, despite the numbers or the other shit folks care about. I think that I have–and want–more of a responsibility to really take things to a new level, and challenge myself. I work with some real talented folks, and they amaze me and I want to be bigger for them, and I want to be the best I can because they’re going hard. I’m indebted to them. I still feel I can be the biggest artist in the world and I can help people with my music. I’ll always feel like that hopefully. 

It’s great to hear that you’re both in tune with and thankful for the support you get. Touching on your desire to go harder, Angelic Hoodrat had you breezing through a ton of different genres and styles, like rock, R&B, experimental, industrial, grunge, punk, etc. Now we get tracks like “Breathe”, which share many similarities to early Radiohead cuts. Did you find yourself stylistically trying to explore other genres this time around, or were you more focused on refining your own personal sound? 

Yeah it was both, and it wasn’t purposeful. You mentioned Radiohead, we made “Breathe” after I had listened to The Bends all the way through for the first time. You know I’m young, so I had to go back and revisit that, but we were listening to that in Tennessee where that song was made. I don’t think it was purposeful, more natural as a result of me fucking with it–soundscapes and palettes–and it being the same week. Also I had been listening to a lot of Texas and Memphis rap. I didn’t do it to be like, “oh this is the new shit I’m on,” it was natural because I liked it. Whatever I like I indulge in all the way. It will bleed off into what we make, especially if we all [Skufl and Julian Cruz] like it, then it will come out and be harmonious.

I’m sure you’ve noticed this, but almost every piece of coverage you received last year around Angelic Hoodrat’s release was like “Oh my god, he’s a rapper from Atlanta… and he likes The Pixies and the Smashing Pumpkins?!” Why is it such a huge deal that this guy from Atlanta likes the Pixies? Why are The Pixies and Atlanta Rap so incompatible?

Yeah, I feel you. I could have the same reaction, but I understand why. Social shit, in rap music the rockstar aesthetic isn’t a thing that a lot of artists use. There’s only like a handful of artists that dive into the music–or maybe they do and they just don’t vocalize it–but I really just like those bands. People always ask me for my top five rappers but they never ask for my top five bands, and that’s just as important. If I had a top ten list of artists I liked, Jay Z would be right next to Nirvana.  

Do you feel like this puts any pressure on you to conform to the Atlanta rapper archetype? Or does it push you to be even more of yourself?

I don’t really feel any pressure from either end. I’m going to be me and like what I like regardless of who is and isn’t surprised, it’s not going to change my life. In turn, it’s not going to change what I make. It’s good, people being surprised, it’s a little culture shock. That’s more of what the world needs anyways, culture shocks and breaking down toxic norms. Also plenty of people my age like all types of shit.

You were pretty big a year ago, but I’d say that you’re on a whole new level now. What is a piece of advice you’d give to yourself a year ago based off of what you’ve learned since? 

I would say “go vegan sooner”, and just “make more music.” I made a lot of music but I could always make more. I can always go harder. I was real blessed during the pandemic, and was able to make music and form new relationships from home. I probably would have done more had there not been a pandemic at the same time, but I still connected with a lot of people. I’m still real grateful for that. I still have a lot to do.

 You’ve accumulated a ton of really sick accolades and accomplishments since you started rapping. You collaborated with IDK and JID on a song last summer, you’ve had a viral TikTok hit, and you’ve gotten press from some of the biggest music outlets on the planet. What do you have your eyes set on next? 

Shows, looking people in the eye, and singing songs with them. I don’t care about awards or billboards, that stuff is more or less not in my control, so I’m not really fixated. I want to have huge shows, do really great live shit, and make music that goes hand-in-hand to complement that. Even if it is virtual, I would treat it just the same. Really connecting with people–that’s a priority. I can’t say for sure what that looks like, but my connection with people is the most important. All that other stuff will be a result of how strong that connection is. 

Talking about shows just makes me realize how much I want to go back to that world.

It’s going to be like getting the love of your life back. 

Who are your Ones To Watch?

Ah damn… Skufl, Jelani Imani, and Muddy Mya. I was listening to one of her songs last night. It’s hard to choose. 

Listen to Angelic Hoodrat below:

[theotherjudas]

GETTING OVER MORMONISM

Start reading media coverage of the church and its leaders and policies.

And I don’t mean that pandering shitrag we all know as The Deseret News. Or the LDS church’s official news briefs or press conferences. I’m talking legit, honest-to-baby jesus journalism. 

With the recent death of Thomas S. Monson, the erstwhile mormon prophet, I noticed an interesting phenomenon. On the one hand, I read his obituary in the New York Times, that national bastion of hard-hitting and ethically responsible journalism. Regardless of your stance on this paper, it has been and remains, in most regards, the “paper of record” for the United States. Their take on the dead prophet was objective and, to my ears, balanced. It spoke of Monson’s public life of service and openness to new academic probes into church history. It also touched on some of the controversies (to put it lightly) that had sullied his career as the top man, namely the church’s hard-right anti-LGBTAQ+ stances and flat-out refusal to ordain women to the priesthood. On the other hand, TBM people were in a tizzy because their beloved Monson wasn’t been “treated with the respect due a prophet of god” in the media. The truth is, they wanted their biases confirmed, and lacking that, got bothered that anyone could see things differently. 

First, on the value of reading journalism in general: I am a huge proponent of reading and watching good journalism. Does it take time? Sure. Is it depressing? Yeah, pretty much always. Isn’t it confusing with so many voices out there? Yes, but you can figure it out. 

You don’t need to take journalism classes in school to appreciate good reportage. I sure didn’t. But as I got older and saw the world going insane around me, I realized it was time to get onboard. And you should too. Here’s what I did: I went to websites for news sources with good reputations (NY Times, the Washington Post, and many others) and just read. I didn’t understand much at first, but after a few months I began to make connections between issues, I got to know the movers and shakers on the national stage making the decisions, and I began to understand why it all mattered. Yes, there are news sources who are intentionally bent to pander to the political far right. You’ve probably heard this said of Fox news. But its also true of most local news. And a hell of a lot of AM talk radio (my grandpa eats that shit up). There are news and politics podcasts out there, for those on the go, and funny shows like Last Week Tonight and the Daily Show (there’s nothing wrong with some fun while you’re learning about real shit going on in the world). Long story short, consuming good media will help you find your way through the world. Engage. You owe it to yourself. 

Secondly, on the value of reading about mormonism in the public media: the LDS church is a PR machine. They’re all about getting good press. It’s no accident that they bend to political pressure all the time. Used to be black men couldn’t get the priesthood. Now they can. Used to be gay people were an abomination. Now, they’re cool as long as they keep their dicks out of each other’s mouths and live as unhappy straight people. This is a smokescreen. The church is desperate to hide their unsavory (at best, illegal and traitorous/ felonious at worst) past. They want to look like an institution of love and acceptance when the reality couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s all about spin. A happy face to the world is a good business tactic - they can sell family values and their plan of happiness. They can’t sell suicidal kids or pill addictions or rampant hypocrisy about porn. The Deseret News was a fixture in every mormon home I visited as a kid because is the church’s main channel for indoctrinating their masses. If you’re an exmo like me, a lot of the ideas you’ve been indoctrinated with were proliferated through DI (that’s Deseret Industries) publications. 

So, to sum up:

1) Reading good journalism will make you a more rounded, active, aware, and interesting human adult citizen and person. 

2) Reading journalism about the church and its leaders will help you break out of thinking of these men as too holy to touch or criticize. You’ll learn that they are just men, fallible, old out-of-touch white fuckers who are probably losing their minds (I’m not a journalist, I can say what I want about them). 

3) You will see other perspectives on the ideas and policies the church upholds. You will start to see through the smokescreen (lucky you, if you’re reading this, chances are you already can!). You will develop an ear for LDS spin to call it out. 

To borrow a phrase, the truth is out there. It may be complicated and hard to find, but once you know how to look, you can avoid spin and falsehood. Stop letting the church’s smokescreen work on you.