#i love u you zero memory bud
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in contrast with my last post, in my latest relisten of taz balance i also recorded a bunch of quotes that felt like a punch to the gut (with zero context mostly). here’s some that made me a) cry or b) freak out because foreshadowing
MAJOR taz balance spoilers ahead; if you haven’t already listened to this amazing show, you should!
- “you can’t kill robbie, i have some big franchise plans for robbie”
- “you found her?“
- “one of you isn’t a lich, are you?”
- “tell julia i said i love her”
- “your staff, you lost control of it, and you blasted the letters L U P into the wall”
- “you look familiar too. have we met?” (this one i did put context for, it’s ren speaking to magnus in the eleventh hour during one of the early loops)
- “is there anything else you can edit in our past?” (this one also had context, magnus to istus i believe)
- “you’re going to be amazing”
- “there’s a long span of time that’s just not there” … “while you’re looking through these memories… there is something about the memory is a little bit off. there’s parts of it that are a little bit staticky.”
- “i named my fish after him”
- “he didn’t want to be a hero. it wasn’t his desire.”
- “Do you remember the last thing you said?”
“I said ‘I love you, Jules.’”
- “lup. they don’t trust me. i cant do it anymore, lup. i’m sorry”
- “the hunger is almost here. and when it arrives, the world will be lost.”
- “and it’s an incredibly familiar face, because it’s your face, magnus. this figure in the red robe is you.”
- “why are you doing this, taako?”
“because i’m worried no one else will have me”
- “you see this red robe put a single skeletal finger to its nonexistent lips”
- ”i’ll be having my body back you undead fuck”
- “trust barry. love barry. taako… it’s me… it’s *static*”
- “when there was trouble, you took the big hit. didn’t you, bud?”
- “and taako you remember lup now. how could you forget lup?”
- “are we just gonna burn every world that we can’t save just to keep the hunger from getting its hands on them? how does that make us any better than them?”
- “this is where we get to decide who we are”
- “show them the duck. it’s a good duck. i think they’ll like it!”
- “your journey could have ended anywhere… but it ended here. and you’re so grateful for that.”
- “sometimes there aren’t right decisions. sometimes there’s just decisions.”
- “back soon”
- “as his body falls further and further down, you realize you don’t know who that is.”
- “magnus. i’m going to find a place for you to be happy. it’ll just be for a little bit. i can do this. i love you magnus. i love all of you *fading into static*”
- “you *fucking took everything. from me*.”
- “i needed to say goodbye to someone
- “i don’t expect you all to forgive me…”
“i run over and hug her”
- “there’s magic in a bards song. they call it is inspiration and it tells the listener what they need to hear when they need to hear it… and you hear johann’s voice and it says: ‘you’re gonna have to fight… and *you’re gonna win!*’”
- “how does magnus die?”
- “and thus ends adventure zone balance. the story of four idiots who played dnd so hard they made themselves cry.”
#taz balance spoilers#taz balance#the adventure zone balance#mcelroys#taz#the adventure zone#taako taaco#magnus burnsides#merle highchurch#barry bluejeans#lup taaco
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here is the video game list and here is the ttrpg list! some are free, some are more expensive (nothing above $25), some are more well known, and some are more obscure! under the cut I’ll highlight a few of my favs from each and why I love them. (it got. Long)
for video games!
my biggest and most underrated picks for the video games folder are halope, lucah born of a dream, retrace, and the testimony of trixie glimmer smith.
halope- an rpg maker game where you play as an angel ! I’m being pandered to! it’s pwyw, and it’s not very long. it affected me a great deal, and I can’t say too much without spoiling stuff. just give it a shot and trust me.
lucah born of a dream- recently got a permanent price drop to $10! a hack and slash with a style like nothing else, and a story that completely made me rethink Art when they released part of it as a demo. look at the screenshots, if you like the art style, you’ll probably love it. if it seems like too much eye strain, maybe pass. (if you like it, it has a brand spanking new sequel!)
retrace- only $8! gay friend group gets in a Wacky Situation. read as: they keep fucking dying in a weird nightmare world. but the main character can rewind time and retain memories from previous runs. clearly inspired by zero escape, if that’s your jam you’ll love this.
the testimony of trixie glimmer smith- only $6! a series of horrible eldritch events happen at a university student mousegirl. it has a sanity system, but you have no way of seeing your own sanity level, meaning you get a lot of fun unreliable narrator stuff. has a sequel if you enjoy it, also has a game preceding it (sort of. it’s not required at all, but it’s free and short!)
for ttrpgs!
my biggest picks for the ttrpgs folder are yazeba’s bed and breakfast, songbirds 3e, dolls of theseus, time to drop, and heaven has no taste
yazeba’s bed and breakfast- one of the more expensive things at $25. a wonderful little slice of life ttrpg about the residents of a magical bed and breakfast, with 48 different “chapters” (essentially plot starters) to play through. it also allows you to change the b&b and the characters as you play in very interesting ways, and with so many chapters you have a lot of different tones to play with. also! mar julia did art for this game! the same mar julia who did the very first drawing of Florian and Aster! how bout that.
songbirds 3e- this is the big one. lit my Brain on fire. the pdf is free (note: download songbirds blue revised, not dungeon girls play test. that’s a different game that’s sharing its page) just. give it a look over. you’re a person who died but came back with strange powers, so now you go into the places that have died and come back strange. it juggles so many things so expertly, and it has something for everyone. it’s free, it’s a pdf to read, u have nothing to lose ! (I’m so normal about songbirds talk to me about songbirds I’ll be normal)
dolls of theseus- $5! you are combat automatons called dolls. each of your limbs has a trait, which you can swap out if you lose it and get a new one. discover who you are outside of a weapon, and who you’ll become as more and more of you is replaced.
time to drop- normally $8, but it’s only $4 as of posting this. I’ve got two words for ya bud. TIMELOOP. HEIST. I can’t sell it better than that. if you don’t think that sounds like a wonderful premise for a ttrpg you are wrong.
heaven has no taste- $10. you’re angels and demons who have abandoned heaven and hell in order to live and love on earth. I’m being pandered to !
“wow mar one or more of those sounds really cool but I do not have the money to try it out/don’t know if it’s for me!” some of these have community copies, which are free versions for those who can’t afford it currently. also, if it’s a ttrpg and u just wanna give it a quick look to see if it’s for you, I can send you some pages of it to get a vibe, or I can tell you a lot more about any of the games in either of the links.
would anyone perhaps be interested if i made some lists of itchio games i recommend (and probably ttrpgs as well)
#txt#just a note that. I don’t recommend all of them uncomplicatedly yk?#some of them have aspects I do not like. they are not all perfect in every way#but they’ve all touched me in some way and I think that’s worth a lot
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kit-dot-com replied to your post “On Loving Superheroes”
bro i would highly recommend reading the amazing adventures of kavalier & clay
KIT UR SO STUPID WE’VE TALKED ABOUT THAT BOOK ON AT LEAST 3 SEPARATE OCCASIONS
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i was lookin thru that prompt list, and i wanted to know if you could write sumn for 82 (i think?), 98, and 100 .. where greg and holly (i just watched the movie last night and i feel like im already forgetting her name) kinda like go out to the skating rink on some middle school date thing and rodrick and reader have to be there for supervision ?? idk, thats just what i thought up lol, you can make changes to it if u want :D
here we are my love! i hope u like<3
no content warnings: pure fluff with a smidge of angst
“Holy shit, Rodrick!” You gaped at the grandiose estate that towered over Rodrick’s van. “Greg are you dating a royal?” You craned your neck back so you could see the blushing boy sitting in the back.
“Guys just be cool okay, don’t embarrass me tonight.”
“Aye, aye, little captain,” you saluted in Greg’s direction.
Then a young girl with shiny, golden hair was skipping towards the van. She was clad in a pink polka-dotted dress and black high top converse.
“So unfair! I did not look like that at age twelve!” You exclaimed, only half joking. She climbed into the van, seemingly unphased by the unruly state of the backseat. She beamed at you and Rodrick, introducing yourself.
The ride there, Greg and Holly entertained themselves, giggling and smiling the whole way. You were honestly proud of Greg.
Rodrick executed a shitty parking job and the four of you entered Rocket Rollers. Greg was surely having flashbacks to Frank carrying him off of the rink full of his peers, including Holly Hills.
The place smelled like stale pizza and socks and neon lights danced on the walls around you. You were hit with an intense wave of nostalgia as memories of your adolescence flooded back to you. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself.
“Remember when you took me here, Rodrick?”
Warm memories filled his head as they did yours just moments ago.
“Of course I do, I remember practicing how to ask you out in front of my mirror,” He admitted, chuckling under his breath.
“Really?” You found it hard to believe that Rodrick, Westmore Middle’s resident bad boy, had a hard time asking you out.
Greg and Holly were long gone, having already found their way onto the rink. Holly was assisting Greg to the best of her ability, though it seemed she had resorted to dragging the poor boy along the slick wood.
You smiled faintly at the sight. They reminded you of yourself and Rodrick oh so many years ago.
The neon lights faded to a soft blue. The music slowed and softened a bit as a voice came over the speakers.
“Alright fellas, grab your favorite gal and get ready for our first slow song of the night!”
You turned to face Rodrick, “C’mon R, we gotta! Let’s enjoy our little double date!”
“It’s hardly a double date,” he motioned at Holly and Greg, “We’re clearly just third and fourth wheeling.” He might’ve been right. The two youths were holding hands and skating along to the mellow music.
You rolled your eyes at him, making sure to be dramatic about it. “We’re going,” you said definitively. You grabbed his wrist and yanked him along to the skates counter. You also pretended you didn’t see Rodrick’s smile from the corner of your eye.
You both hastily tied your skates and headed to the rink. Both of you were roller skate veterans, having obtained plenty of skill from your middle school careers.
Cool air passed over your face as the two of you glided across the floor, reminiscing happily. You expected Rodrick to have sarcastic remarks lined up and ready to fire, but only silence came from the messy haired boy.
His brows were furrowed and his hand was growing clammy within your own.
What is he thinking about?
You tried to brush it off but your mind was racing, you were assuming the worst.
“Y/n, I-I, uhm,” he stuttered.
Oh god is he breaking up with me? Right now?
“W-wanna get milkshakes after this?” He finished.
Was he kidding, all that tension just to propose a milkshake run?
“Oh, uh, sure, Rodrick,” you were more than confused with his suddenly pensive attitude. His stature was rigid and his deep brown eyes were focused elsewhere.
Anxiety buzzed in the pit of your stomach. You were driving yourself crazy trying to think of what he was actually going to say. Rodrick’s mood had switched so abruptly, you had zero time to process the situation.
The ride to the drive-in was uncomfortable. Rodrick was fidgeting in the driver’s seat, still not speaking.
Greg and Holly were sitting a few yards away on a wooden picnic bench. You could practically smell the budding romance from your spot in the back of the van.
Rodrick had opened up the double doors in the back and laid out a blanket so the both of you could sit somewhat comfortably. You sat with your feet dangling from the van, barely grazing the grass below you.
Mindlessly, you prodded at your shake and ignored the slight chill that bit at your bare arms.
Rodrick noticed your slight shivers and draped his jacket around your shoulders. The mixed signals you were receiving from the boy muddled your mind even further.
“Rodrick?”
“Hm?”
“I feel like there’s something you wanted to say to me earlier.”
“Oh, y/n-“
You cut him off with your blabbering, “Because if you wanna break up with me please just do it okay, because I can’t just sit here and-“
He stiffened and grappled at your shoulders. “Baby, why in the world would I do that?”
“Well you got really quiet and kinda closed off I just thought… y’know.”
Rodricked sighed, and you swore you could see a tinge of pink creep over his cheeks.
“Y/n, I-I was trying to tell you I love you without stuttering for the first time.”
Your jaw fell open as you realized your detrimental mistake.
“But we can both see that failed,” He said, sounding utterly dejected.
“Oh, Rodrick,” you cooed. You slid closer to him, resting your head on his chest. His features relaxed and worry fled from your mind. Rodrick’s hand came up to smooth down your hair gently. He placed a soft kiss on your temple.
“I love you, y/n.”
“Look at that,” you grinned. “You did it.”
You allowed yourself to go completely pliant in his embrace, staring up at the twinkling night sky.
“What do you say we get these delinquents home, yeah?”
also i did not proof read this bye
#rodrick heffley#rodrick#rodrick x reader#rodrick fanfiction#devon bostick#diary of a wimpy kid#requests
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ok ok alriiiight ok so the plot of ATDAO
this post is not, like........... well, it’s not gonna be a blurb or a summary or a nice neat synopsis, this is not Professional Writeblr Business, this is, this is, uhhhh
this is like drunk house party logan rambles
works best if you imagine ur just like “hey man how’s it going” super casual and I grasp you firmly by the shoulders and look you dead in the eye and just ramble all of this without taking a single breath
could I have explained in a nice neat concise "elevator pitch" sort of way? probably. mind ur business. that’s not how we do things here at albatris.org
anyway the purpose of this post is “hey people seem to know a lot about the characters and the worldbuilding and the premise but have no clue what happens in the actual story” so I’m not going to be talking about said characters and worldbuilding and premise in depth
in terms of rambles, that stuff’s been covered! this post assumes you know what Ports are, n what the nature of the ATDAO apocalypse is, vaguely what the MCs are like as people......... though I can fetch this info for you if you like
but yeah if you are coming into this post with zero prior ATDAO knowledge........... deeply deeply from the bottom of my heart: sorry
also if this is your first time experiencing One Of These Rambles
also @safe-in-the-steep-cliffs and @siarven I am tagging you because you said you would like to be tagged and also hi and also I hope y’all knew what you were in for
anyway without further ado
(visual representation of my approach to this rant, not of how complicated my plot actually is)
(my plot is not that complicated)
ALRIGHT
there are two viewpoint characters! and two plotlines which converge near the end of the story, but honestly there’s a very real possibility I will decide these are two separate books meant as companion stories to each other because I love making things difficult for myself yeehaw
ATDAO’s co-protags are Tris and Noa, best buds four years and counting. their friendship is one of the single most important aspects of the story, n the ongoing love and trust they have for each other despite the way unfolding events force their relationship to change is integral to the themes and making the heart of the story what it is. I will now proceed to not mention this friendship for the entire remainder of this post. they’re bros. that’s all u need to know. listen. listen. I have a lot to cover
so yeah, ur first key player is Tris Greer, whose parents are dicks but whose siblings are chill. most notably of said siblings there is Jacob, older brother by thirteen years, whom Tris believes is just about the coolest person on the entire planet. this plotline kicks off when Jacob gets caught in the midst of a freak car accident that kills a dude and wrecks a street corner and also somehow causes Jacob to just kind of................. blip out of existence entirely and without a trace?
n Tris is understandably horrified and distressed by Very Much All Of This, but hey, at least there are responsible adults who can look into this obviously Port-related weird disappearance and figure this mess out, right?
INCORRECT
the relevant interdimensional authorities are brought in to suss out the situation and these authorities are kind of like “hmmmm idk about this” but are all set to take Tris at least somewhat seriously until they learn the following:
that Jacob had already been reported missing to police in his home state three days earlier
that Jacob was in the midst of several ongoing personal crises and at least one nervous breakdown
that Jacob was allegedly tangled up in some real weird shit that would more than account for a disappearance under suspicious circumstances
that Tris is schizophrenic, prone to hallucinations, confusion, memory issues and quote unquote “letting his imagination and anxiety get the better of him”, and precisely zero people can actually corroborate his story that Jacob was even there are the time of the accident to begin with
and after some back-and-forth and Looking Into The Evidence pretty much everyone in any position of authority comes to the conclusion that this is just Ordinary Regular People Crimes and whatever happened to Jacob had nothing to do with weird apocalyptic energies, and that Tris is (at best) stressed out and delusional or (at worst) lying through his teeth because he knows more than he’s letting on
so Tris is forced to hop pretty quick from “I’m sure someone will handle this” to “no one believes me but I’m sure if I can find some concrete proof they’ll listen and someone will handle it” to Well Fuck I Guess That Someone Is Me
cue bizarre reality-hopping fantasy quest, which is ten times easier said than done when most of the time Tris is terrified enough just, like, going to the supermarket
he enlists the help of his new classmate Shara, amateur paranormal investigator and professional weird-bullshit enthusiast, who agrees to help him puzzle out what the fuck happened to Jacob in exchange for his assistance in mapping out Adelaide’s interdimensional “fault lines” as part of her ongoing quest to track down the source of the apocalypse
she’s got big fuckin dreams, ok, go hard or go home
slso worth noting at this point that there HAS been an uptick in Ports and their related reality-bending strangeness in Adelaide recently which is why this is of particular interest to her currently. gotta find out What Makes The Weirdness Tick, gotta find out Why The Sudden Extra Weirdness
..........and also Kai is there
Kai has no nice neat reason to get involved with the plot, Kai just likes drama and being all up in people’s personal business. Tris brings them on board for one single afternoon like “hey I will pay you some money to come to my house and fix my fucked up phone so I can listen to an interdimensional voicemail” but forgot the apparently key addendum “and then leave”
their first three chapters of knowing each other is basically Tris being like “stop inviting yourself into my house we are not friends” and Kai being like “that’s a rude thing to say to your friend. also your sister gave me the netflix password and I used your kitchen to bake pastries feel free to help yourself”
but yeah so Tris’s story mostly focuses on his quest to figure out where Jacob got yeeted to and how to get him safely home (y’all probably know a bit about The Unreality already maybe?), whilst also dealing with rising family tensions, whatever shifty stuff Jacob was involved with prior to his disappearance, and his own creeping doubts about his perceptions of reality
n I’m also saying flat out it’s not a plot that’s going the “oh the whole thing was just a delusion all along” route because ew
his psychosis is a fairly involved part of his character but the explorations around it are more to do with, like......... the difficulties he has in trusting himself and whether he has the luxury of letting himself get swept into some Big Weird Implausible Adventure when this has extremely different implications for him than it would someone else. n eventually to how his success and survival is not ~in spite of~ but specifically because of the different way he understands and interprets the world and the skills he’s developed
THAT TANGENT WAS A PERSONAL RANT IT WAS NOT RELEVANT I just have words to say on the subject of how psychosis is treated in fiction and didn’t want people jumping to the “none of it is real” conclusion anyway ok moving on
ur SECOND key player is Noa Yun, who has rather a lot on her plate right now. she’s broke as fuck and her mum is sick and her car is making Noises and she’s not getting enough hours at her job at Not-IKEA and everyone is on her back about her failing studies as if that’s a thing she has the energy to care about. feeling rather backed into a corner by life’s bullshit and her financial situation, she blatantly lies her way into a field job at the Department of Interdimensional Instabilities, because A) surely it can’t be THAT bad, and B) what does she have to lose?
so more or less what she’s doing is the equivalent of emergency services for Port-related weirdness, it’s going out and dealing with highly unstable otherworldly energies head on, navigating Weird Phenomena and bendy patches in reality......... it is, among other things, a job that’s relatively easy to get into because no one wants to touch it with a ten foot pole unless they absolutely have to
n the DII is a whole other post, this shit has lots of different functions and levels and branches and corruption and secrets and a tendency to view workers who have to go out and deal with the brunt of the apocalypse head-on as vaguely expendable and I’ve talked about it a bit before and in more Serious Words
things kinda kick off for her when in true Noa fashion she hurls herself into a dangerous situation to help out a coworker, n enters a pretty standard issue “overlap” where the barriers between universes are a little fucky, but hey, she seems to come out of it with nary a scratch, so it’s reasonable to assume everything is fine, right?
INCORRECT AGAIN
she basically gets some whacked-out otherworldly energies latched onto her that are now following her through her everyday life, and it turns out she’s starting to bend the reality around her the way certain types of Ports do, which is! obviously not ideal! she’s not exactly a Port herself, because she’s pretty sure that’s impossible, but it’s clear capital s Something happened to her in that overlap, and she doubts it’s good news. and to make matters even more disconcerting, she’s now being dogged at every step by strange visions of a child who speaks in an unfamiliar language and who seems Real Fuckin Pissed at her
so her thing is basically “I acquired fucked up reality-bending powers against my will and they might be lowkey killing me ‘cause Ports are notoriously unstable like that and also I’m haunted for some godforsaken reason” which all somehow ended up being, like, the least interesting part of her plotline for me lmao
oh and Noa also enlists the help of Shara, Because Ghosts
anyway yeah so her search to find out what’s happening to her re: Weird Children, being a Port-adjacent something-or-other, and whether there’s a way to stop her own unravelling leads her to (rogue computer programmer? mad scientist? general shifty bastard?) Laurence Marrick Thiele, who claims to have suffered a similar affliction in the past and now does some real interesting research on the subject. n this guy. well. he’s got some fuckin stuff going on
he definitely knows more about the nature of Ports than he should. also is he actually researching what he says he’s researching? also what’s with all the weird tech? also did he just straight up murder that guy Avery? all will be revealed later, maybe, if I feel like it
but yeah at about the same time as Noa goes “actually fuck this you’re shady as hell I’m out” she stumbles into, like, The Actual Reality of what Marrick is up to re: manipulating Ports and interdimensional doorways for his own gain, and the various ways this spells bad news not only for her but potentially for the entire city and anyone unfortunate enough to get caught in the crossfire, and she shifts gear to “actually you know what I’m gonna kick your ass”
there are various reasons for this, but first and foremosterly you have to understand that Noa’s got a fuckload of pent-up rage and she will bring it in full force the moment you say some stupid shit like “some people are expendable” or “it’s inevitable for the greater good”
(there’s also a fun ongoing subplot with her work at the DII where she and her team are investigating a string of strange illnesses with bizarre symptoms that appear to be spreading via obscure radio stations so that’s. happening. I guess?)
but yeah the main story here mostly follows Noa’s attempts to undermine Marrick, bastard supreme, and find a way to fuck him up before he goes, like, Full Cartoon Supervillain, n also like........... her attempts to keep up her work at the DII despite her rising paranoia that the teammates she’s growing to care about will notice her increasingly unstable state and the fact that she’s all tangled up with the very forces they’re meant to be thwarting. n along the way discovering the reality of what happened to her in The Aforementioned Overlap Incident and about her visions and such
so that’s all that. did that make sense
n she’s got a whole arc going on about trust and learning to lean on others, like, she comes into this story as a very standoffish person with lots of paranoia, she’s spent much of her life feeling like she can only rely on herself, n she’s. well. yeah, like I said, she’s got a lot of anger at the world and at the various systems that have failed her and her loved ones, n the story puts her in a position to become even more isolated
and her plotline isn’t so much “you have no reason to be angry or afraid” or her learning to Not Be, It’s more, like........... yeah you have every fucking right to be furious and of course you’re afraid! but there are people around you who love you and who will jump at the chance to defend you and who will help you carry the weight of your anger and grief and none of this needs to be yours to bear alone which is extremely cheesy
which applies to both her Weird Supernatural Goings-On as well as her regular ordinary life goings-on
I feel like Alice and Jet deserve a mention for Noa’s plotline but also this went on and on too long already so. well. Alice and Jet exist! yep. they work with Noa at the DII. I have things to say about them. I will not be saying them today
and uhhhhhh
in general, for Tris, his plotline, you wanna think, like, fantasy/adventure vibes which veer pretty sharply into horror, and for Noa you wanna think...... kinda, sci-fi mystery conspiracy vibes with a dash of some superhero bullshit maybe except not really
and that
pretty much is it I think
also the fact that Kai just invites themself into the plot for funsies and then is dragged kicking and screaming into caring about themself and making positive changes in their life means there was no convenient place in this post to be like
"oh there's also a whole major subplot about a time loop"
but there's also a whole major subplot about a time loop
goodnight! thanks for coming to....................... whatever this was! have a nice saturday everyone
#alcohol mention#just in the first little intro bit#being concise is not my strong suit! this should be apparent perhaps#tl;dr#tris's brother jacob gets lost down the back of an interdimensional sofa and tris has gotta go get him back even though#he's terrified enough just leaving the house let alone leaving this entire reality on a stupid convoluted mystery quest#and noa has a run in with some interdimensional bullshit and acquires Powers and A Ghost neither of which she wants#and then accidentally uncovers the schemes of literal cartoon supervillain marrick and is like#''oh sick i was looking for a reason to go absolutely fuckin ballistic and fuck someone's shit up''#And Both Of Them Make Nice Friends And Learn To Love Themselves :)#atdao#i constantly walk the very fine line between not wanting to be Too Vague about noa's plotline vs not wanting to be Too Spoilery about it#like............... the stuff about the kid and about marrick's endgame i'm never quite sure how much to delve into hahahaha#but yeah anyway#imo i only went on ONE mildly unrelated tangent which should have been cut but i decided to indulge it instead#which is the couple paragraphs about noa's character arc#character arcs not important for this post!!!!!! but also. dfkhgkdfjshg. try and stop me#(i mean i did pretty ok staying on track for the most part i think)#(still a rambly post though)
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Aight i aint gonna beat around no bush chuuya vs ranpo (n poe i see u bud) was the biggest dissapointment ever n probably a bog contributor why i soured on manga during rats arc.
Like this was in the manga and i was SO PUMPED FOR IT. Like words cant describe how excited i was for this fight. You know my top three favs, you know the reason but also??? I thought it was going to be so fun!!!! Like a game with 1000 players where half are murderers, no abilities just ranpo n chuuya. N ranpo n chuuya are SUCH an interesting match up. Ranpo is purely intelectualm like purely. I said before that dazai n chuuya are an interesting match cuz its brain x brawn, but even dazai fights and quite well with that.
Ranpo doesntm ever i think. Ranpos thing is very much pointing in a direction of the enemy and thrn packing his shit to let the fighters take over. Hes purest form of brain you can get. And Chuuya is brawn. Not that hes stupid but hes clearly a 'punch first ask questions later' kind of guy, hes a literal god of destruction and as you said mafias secret kamikaza (without dazai) ace in their sleeve.
That is such a fun matchup, nothing is more fun then matching up two peope with completely different styles and forcing them in an arena. In normal terms chuuya would win hands down but thats exactly why ranpo chose the arens beforehand and tilted the board significantly. And its such a great characterization of ranpos intelect and preplaning and u also get that moment with poe where hes like AHAHAHA MAYBE EVEN RANPO WILL DIE.....but what will i do then ;^; i love my theater dork.
Anyway this was the matchup i was looking forward the most in the arc, it had all my favorite characters and an insainly fun premise and i was ready to GO
And then nothing happend
For months
Chapters kept on coming and the whole fandom was like will we see them this chapter??? There was a whole blog dedicated to counting days since we last saw ranpo n chuuya (n then since we saw chuuya) im not even kidding.
But it never came. Not one chapter, not even a few panels just to check in on them. Absolutely nothing zero content.
N then ranpo was out n he was like lmao chuuya just decided to punch everyone which was so funny and just like chuuya...wish we saw it.
N then the arc was over n chuuya was still missing. After the canibalisation arc my memory of bsd is fuzzy cuz i lost focus n intrest but i know it felt like such a long time before we saw chuuya again.
Like it was clear ranpo vs chuuya was made to write out of the story the biggest brains n the biggest weapon in the show so stakes could be higher n like that was clear from the start n that was fine normal and expected but...we could have at least gotten a fun fight out of it.
It just felt like a huge wasted opportunity n one if the things i will forever be bitter about not happening
You know, when you mentioned it briefly that one time, I was actually looking forward to seeing this T-T You made me as much as a clown as everyone else in the fandom, waiting for something that never came.
This is one of my biggest disappointments with BSD’s! I would have loved to see a genuine match between Chuuya and Ranpo! I would have loved seeing Ranpo struggling to stay alive because he’s not a fighter while also trying to avoid Chuuya who is also looking to wring his neck, it would have been so, sooo entertaining to see!
And then you could have had Poe on the outside, doing everything in his power to avoid the Port Mafia that probably would have chased him down to release Chuuya from the book! Like seriously, they’re not idiots! They wouldn’t have just watched a raccoon run away with their executive!
...
It was such a waste T-T
I’m so disappointed.
Someone please write this instead!!!!
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high school!mark
request: highschool!mark if u love me plspls
word count: 5.5k
a/n: lucky that I love u anon hehehehe !!!!! also wOW I didnt mean to make this so god damn long itS REALLY JUST THESE GOD DAMN HIGH SCHOOL AUS IM WEAK FOR THEM OKAY. look at this cutie hOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO RESIST
mark, renjun, jeno, donghyuck, jaemin, chenle, jisung
warnings: the usual intermittent cussing and probably an inappropriate joke or two
this au is my Ultimate Weakness it makes me soft as hell alright
………………….
LETS DIVE IN
okay so your mom has a job that forces your family to move around….. A LOT
and while you’ve gotten used to it for the most part it still sucks having to leave people behind and make completely new friends once every couple of years
this time you’re moving to a new school for your SENIOR YEAR and you’re livid
bc like ??? it’s senior year and you have exactly zero (0) friends since you’re new,,, yet again
you Threw A Fit when you found out but your mom was like shut up you ingrate soon you’ll be in college and won’t even have to worry about it
so you, an ingrate, shut up :/
you move in a month before school starts and the house is nice and your room is cute so that’s a plus !!!!!
you hang up some pictures and organize all your cute little trinkets you’ve collected over the years aw
you’ve even got a lil succulent garden growing on your windowsill
ITS CUTE AS HELL OKAY
alright so you’re gonna go explore around town because you , don’t know where anything is and you wanna find some good spots to hang
you take the bus into the middle of town because who tf is tryna drive themselves amirite ladies
support ur local bus driver
anywhom this isn’t a HUGE town but it’s one of those cute towns where you can pretty much walk anywhere you need to go
(god i wish that were me)
so you spend all day just, walkin
you find a library and pick up some books …….
both for decoration and reading okay
and you find a couple of restaurants and write them down to try later along with some coffee shops and whatnot
eventually you’re tired and prolly a lil sweaty bc it’s summer and you’re outside and ugh
so you find a nice big park and a tree and sit down at the base of it to read and mindlessly sketch things in the margins of your book
whEN OUT OF NOWHERE
someone shouts
“HEY WATCH OUT”
and you look up just in time to dodge a sOCCER BALL HURTLING TOWARDS YOUR FACE
it bounces off the tree and rolls a couple feet away
“uhhhh holy shit” - you
you just kind of sit there astonished for 5 seconds before you get up to get the ball and look around for who saved your LIFE
and there’s boy jogging toward you looking extremely embarrassed
you meet him halfway to hand him the ball and he’s like
“oh mY GOD i’m so sorry i told them to settle down but they never listen to me and jisung just ??? doesn’t know how to not take everything seriously and he lost and got pissed and kicked it and we didn’t even kNOW you were over here and also i’m so sorry”
you smile and tell him it’s fine and hand him the ball
you go to get back to your tree and he’s like hey uh you there uh wait up
god he’s awkward
and you turn around to face him with an expectant look
“so um, what’s your name? i haven’t seen you around here before and like in case i ever gotta make this up to you you know ??”
cute
you tell him your name and stick out your hand to shake and he grabs it very hesitantly and tells you his name is mark
he has , very warm hands and they’re only slightly bigger than yours but that’s still cUTE
MARK HAS BABY HANDS I DARE U TO SAY HE DOESNT
he says he hopes you enjoy your book and he’ll make sure the boys don’t disturb you anymore than they already have
you wave as he goes and he gives you a smile over his shoulder and his cheeks are tinged pink and wOw this boy is a cutie patootie
you go back to your reading but now instead of doodling you’re just writing his name or drawing his big doe eyes or his smooth hands
(((((let’s pretend we’re all good at drawing okay god knows i can’t do much more than a stick figure)))))
the boys leave after an hour or two and you leave pretty soon after then because the sun is setting and you gotta be home for dinner
basically your mom wants to make sure you aren’t kidnapped and/or lost in a new town
which, to be fair, is not that unlikely
you have your headphones in and you’re leaned against the bus window half asleep as you go
bitch wake up youRE GONNA MISS YOUR STOP
it’s the same bus driver who saw you get on and honestly there aren’t a lot of people on the bus so he makes sure you get off
“hey you, girl back there, hEY! this is your stop girly”
you thank him profusely and tip him because uhhhh u gotta get home and like Not Lost
you skip home with your bag of books and miscellaneous items you found at the thrift store!!!
you bought a little figurine of a dragon and she’s beautiful her name is saraphina because why not
that’s completely irrelevant i’m so sorry
i have ADHD
anywhom
you walk in and you’re all like hey momma !!! how goes it !!:3
and your mom is Sus™️ because why are you in such a good mood
and you’re like !!! cause i had a good day okay love u bye i’m going to my rOOM
don’t let her question anymore or else she’ll dig out that you met a Cute Boy
you go to your room and get out all your purchases and organize them while you still have the motivation to do so
and yeah
you use one of the blank notes to start like a lil drawing diary of sorts ???? like just to draw stuff in whenever you’re inspired or you see something pretty
and you definitely saw smth pretty today ;))))))))
hint: ITS MARK
you try to draw him from memory but it doesn’t look quite right and like :(((((( how sad is that what if you don’t even see him again
the rest of the month passes pretty quickly in the same fashion
by now you’ve befriended the bus driver and he tells you all the cool secret nooks and crannies of town for you to go find
he’s also your bff pretty much he always tells you about his daughter and all the cute things she does and you just talk about your life in general and he gives you advice
congrats you’ve unlocked Wise Uncle
he gives you directions to this teeny TINY flower shop where you befriend the old lady who works there by bringing a muffin everytime you go by
she trades you for a seasonal flower and makes a big deal out of tucking it behind your ear herself
basically you find all the cute old people in town and make them your friend because.
THATS CUTE
ADDED BONUS OF LIKE 17 PARENT FIGURES TO GIVE YOU ADVICE
this is accidentally straying into art hoe territory i hope y’all are okay w/ that
school is starting really soon and you’re nervous but also used to this so it doesn’t affect you as bad as normally
also you did meet some people so you aren’t going in with no friends but like, pretty close to no friends
on the first day of school you ride the bus and you see ???? mark ????? on your bus ????????
so you get on and do your daily greeting of the bus driver
his daughter lost her first tooth AW
you fake cry and he says “mood” and you lose it because you’re pushing internet culture onto this unsuspecting middle aged man skdkdkkd
you pat him on the shoulder as you walk back to find a seat but there are none because for some reason the bus is busy this early in the morning ????
you wouldn’t know lmao summer sleep schedule had you up at 10 at the earliest
so you go to stand and hold onto one of the poles in the center
(nearby our boy mark LEE)
mark looks up from his phone
these god damn millennials always on that damn phone
and he sees you and he’s like wHOA what’s up uhhh Soccer Ball Girl
and nice you remembered his name bUT HE DIDNT REMEMBER YOURS
but then he’s like nahhhh just kidding i remember ur name hey y/n !!!
you talk otw to school and find out you’re both seniors at the same school and how you’re excited for sports games and like, GRADUATING
mark keeps trying to offer you his seat but you refuse and he pouts everytime you say no :((((
good god just take the seat look at the sad baby boy :((((((((((((
there is an, occurrence
at one point the bus goes over a bump and you stumble a little and mark reaches up to catch you before you literally fall on him
his hands fly out and grab you by the hips to steady you since he’s sitting and you’re standing and he can’t exactly reach your shoulders sO YEA
or at least that’s his explanation in his head huehuehuehe
his hands linger for MAYBE 10 seconds before he whips them back into his pockets and blushes while you thank him
you: are also blushing
the bus driver: completely did that on purpose
when you get off the bus your Second Dad tells you good luck and pats you on the head and mark is like ???? do you know him
and you’re like yeah that’s my man maurice we’re buds
and he’s like ???? i’ve rode that bus all my life to school and i’m not buds with him wtf :/
“srry you’re not as lovable as me!! jealousy is a disease <3”
and he laughs his dorky laugh
you highkey are smiling so big because this boy is so cute and he’s walking close enough that your shoulders brush every once in a while and he has a silly laugh and AW
as you walk into the school marks group of Boys starts waving him over excitedly and he turns in their direction but then stops when he sees you aren’t following
“hey whatcha doin???”
“well uhhh those are Your Boys you know and i’m, i don’t, really, uh they don’t know me”
“aw cmon they’ll love you!!! look ill just introduce you and if they’re terrible and annoying you can leave”
“........ i gue-“
but he’s already grabbed your hand and is pulling you over to them
“sup fellas this is y/n and she just moved here this year so don’t be too overwhelming.”
the smaller one with the highish voice chimes in
“aww but overwhelming is my only setting”
“then just don’t be yourself, chenle”
“heYYY it’s that girl i almost killed in the park !!! so sorry about that by the way”
he introduces them to you one by one and they all shake your hand
jisung is the one with the big ass yaoi hands and also the one who almost ended your young life
jaemin is the one with pretty smile
jeno is the one with the squishy eyes
renjun is the Art Hoe of the group you can just tell
he’s wearing some got damn overalls you gotta befriend him immediately
donghyuck is the one with beautiful skin and a v high voice you’re highkey like hey but can you dROP THE SKINCARE ROUTINE and he’s like “i just wash my face every day xoxo :*”
you quickly learn who is a piece of shit and who isn’t
you figure out who has classes with you and then set off for the day !!
mark has gym and economics with you but those are after lunch :(((
he squeezes your shoulder before he leaves and says good luck though so you’ll survive
you have art with renjun first and this boy is your bestie already
he’s such a sarcastic shit and he too likes drawing random things and vandalizing school textbooks with artistically correct memes
he also has the AUDACITY
“so, you and mark already ;););)(;);)))”
“i uh don’t know what you mean by that”
“you SO do!!!!! you guys walked into school together everyone probably already thinks you’re a thing”
“oh shit really??? ah i feel so bad”
“is that a bad thing???”
“i mean yeah i’m not tryna Tarnish mark’s reputation”
“that is some self hatred bs he would be lucky to have you !!!!”
“renjun you don’t even know me that well yet”
“i know enOUGH”
you just uhh change the subject which renjun def notices but like
who cares
renjun apparently also goes to the same flower shop as you !!!
you find out because you see him drawing the front of it and you’re like heY i’ve been there my girl edna works there !!!!! she insist i call her grandma tho
and he’s all oh sHIT that’s my girl too !!!!!!
long story short edna is now your shared grandmother
now THAT is some uwu shit
you go about your day and it’s lunchtime and yOU uh don’t know where to sit :(
you see a girl that you met who works at the little coffee shop you like so you set off in her direction and you’re almost there when jeno and jaemin walk up and sling an arm around your shoulder from either side
“hEY BUDDY” -jeno
“SUP SQUIRT” -jaemin
and they start steering you in another direction towards their own table
“god of all nicknames you had to give me sQUIRT”
“yes it’s because you’re cute and small like squirtle”
“that’s a god damn reach if i’ve ever seen one but okay”
you get there and they practically TOSS you into the seat next to mark
he winces and gives you and apologetic pat on the back before starting the conversation
“alright so who actually did the summer reading”
as the table bursts into Absolute Ruckus you just kind of sit back and watch
mark notices you being quiet and while renjun and chenle are arm wrestling he leans over to quietly be like
“hey you doin okay over there? are they too much”
“oh not at all i’m just takin it in lmao”
“yeah that’s understandable. they’re easily the most entertaining group of people you’ll ever meet but also i’ve wanted to strangle every single one of them at least once”
“what are you 30??? you talk about them like you’re their mom”
“i mean someone’s gotta do it”
you and mark talk all throughout lunch and head to gym together since that’s next
exercising right after eating ??? sounds like a GREAT plan thanks so much public school system !!!!
you go to pull out your bag of gym clothes but ??? all you’ve got is shorts ?????
S H I T
you start whining because you’re like aWW i’m gonna get in trouble :(((((
and he’s like here i have like 12 shirts in here because i always bring too many and then leave some when i got soccer practice i gotchu
(he gives you the clean shirt that hasn’t been sitting in his locker <3333 what a guy)
you thank him proFUSELY and then go to the girls locker room to change
the shirt is too big and you don’t wanna look like a Bag so you tie a lil knot in it in the front
you don’t look like a thot tho you just look Cute As Fuck
some girl in the locker room lets you borrow a hair tie and off we go !!!
it’s the first day so everyone literally just stretches and sits around talking
you’ve hashtag LOST mark and you don’t have any friends yet so you’re just chillin talking to the girl who gave you a hair tie because she seems nice and you got nothin better to do
you’re explaining to her how to take care of a succulent /properly/ when mark catches a basketball that was headed right for you yelling a watch it !!!! over his shoulder
he turns to you and giggles a little, nudging your foot with his
“you’re just a danger magnet aren’t you”
“i mean danger is my middle name so”
“uGH get your ass over here away from all those freshman hoodlums who think they can play”
you wave bye to your friend because there’s literal fear in her eyes at the sight of mark ??
you ask her what’s wrong later and she’s like oh it’s not him i just have a crippling fear of boys
(that’s a mood)
you and mark pass a volleyball back and forth and fuck around pretty much all period
this is actually the one (1) sport he isn’t good at thank GOD you were worried he had no flaws
at the end of the class you ask him if he wants his shirt back and he says, and i quote,
“nah you and your thot knot can keep it, looks cuter on you anyways”
you smack his arm for calling you a thot but then thank him anyways for the shirt and for calling you cute :))))))))
econ passes the same way except normal clothing and no sports
although mark does throw a wadded up piece of paper on you that says u want 2 hang w the boys n me after school ? if yes then breathe if no do a backflip
this headass boy
you throw it back so it bounces off his forehead and then nod to confirm you will
you don’t have any of the boys in your last class and you don’t where to meet up so you just kind of loiter by your locker since jeno’s is pretty close to yours and maybe they’ll meet here ????
luckily jisung spots you and is like hey what r u doin here aren’t u hanging with us after school??? cmon
you follow him out to the parking lot where they’re all gathered around jeno and jaemins vehicles because apparently they’re the only ones with actual cars
rip
they start waving too excitedly when they see you and mark smiles all big
wooOOO baby boy already has a crush on you :3
they’ve apparently already decided to go to chenles house because apparently he’s fuckin loaded
you don’t believe that for a sECOND because he’s wearing crocs and an old ass polo shirt but
we’ll see
you mark and renjun ride with jaemin while the Babies ride with jeno since he is able to ignore them being crackheads in the backseat and drive his vehicle without crashing
apparently they’ve cause multiple vehicular accidents ??? possibly the reason renjun doesn’t have a car ???????
who knows
y’all have a blast in jaemins car tho playing tokyo drift from the third fast and furious movie if u haven’t heard that shit plEASE GO LISTEN WHAT A SONG HEHEHHEHHEHE
you pull into this BIG ASS house and you’re like no fucking way dude
and everyone else in the car simultaneously says
“i know right ???”
y’all pull in and go inside and it’s real nice holy SHIT
chenle comes in cackling followed closely be jisung and more sedately by jeno who looks ready to fckin die
you pat him on the shoulder and go you did well, soldier
he salutes solemnly before breaking out into the smile
y’all know the one
you UWU right there on the spot but hold yourself back from poking his cheek and cooing
chenle then SCREECHES and yells
“WHO IS TRYNA PLAY JUST DANCE”
and everyone crowds into his living room
somehow the couch is big enough to fit all of you comfortably that’s fckin impressive
you play just dance for 3 whole ass hours and now you’re Tired and Ready To Go Home
there’s a bus stop nearby and you insist upon walking since jaemin already have you a ride here and you didn’t even have gas money to give him :(((
mark goes to since you have to catch the same bus
you hum as you skip around the sidewalk and he walks behind you smiling fondly while you twirl around
he recognizes the song and whistles along and wow !!!!
Harmony™️
when you get to the stop you’re like 5 mins early
so to entertain yourselves you play rock paper scissors and each time the winner gets to flick the loser on the forehead
mark is a sweet boy so he flicks softly but you go all out
wouldn’t be surprised if he had a bruise tmrw girly u need to chill
you sit on the bus together when it arrives since there’s actually room now and he slumps down low until his head is pretty much rested on your shoulder
(our man maurice sees and is like GET IT GIRL but only so you notice and you make threatening hand motions at him)
you’re not sure if he’s asleep so you stay extra still just in case
and no one needs to know you rested your cheek on top of his head
but when it gets to your stop you’re like mark? mark lee??? mork ???? wake up ??? and you nudge him a little with your shoulder and he sits up and rubs his eyes aW
he slow blinks at you and goes
“hm?”
and you’re like i uh gotta go now
and he’s like :/// okay i’ll see you tomorrow and stands up and gives you a half hug before you go
maurice is DYING in the front you’re going to kill him
you walk home with a smile on your face and again your mom is suspicious of your good mood but you’re like aw it’s nothin just had a good day at school made lots of friends !!!!!!
as summer turns into fall you make more friends but you mostly hang out with the boys because they’re funny and nice to you and also Mark is there and we love our boy
you guys all attend football games together and go absolutely ALL OUT for whatever the theme is
for example: the theme was halloween and you all dressed as god damn SMURFS
it was legendary there was not one bit of you all that wasn’t covered in blue paint
jisung almost fought some girl who thought he was from the movie Avatar until everyone was like jisung cHILL OUT ITS NOT HER FAULT YOURE VERY TALL AND COMPLETELY BLUE
and well
can’t argue with that
it gets chillier though so you all bring blankets and cuddle most of the games
all of the boys suspiciously aren’t cold at first until you and mark share a blanket
they’re so obvious GOD
with each time y’all share you get more relaxed around each other until eventually mark has one arm slung around you and your legs are hooked over one of his thighs while y’all Snuggle
renjun waggles his eyebrows at you every five minutes and you discreetly give him the finger every time
little ASSHOLE
college applications are due like. right now
you all apply to a nice university close by as a backup/safe place and then apply to more brazy places just to see if you can get in
everyone’s been real stressed lately so you’re like !!!!! hey imma throw a friendsgiving party !!! yeehaw !!!!!!!!!
and you invite all of them over
“everyone bring smth and i’ll bake a ham or smth,,, i swear to GOD if all of you show up with store-bought pumpkin pie. i will kill you and then myself”
“what’s with you and pumpkin pie?”
“jUST. don’t”
((((srry i’m projecting my hatred of pumpkin pie onto u reader heheehehheh))))
everyone comes over and it’s really chilly so you have a fire in the fireplace and you have a couple of your gal pals over too
your mom is nice enough to leave y’all alone for the night and she’s not hurt since it’s not real thanksgiving
we stan moms
you bring out the ham and someone has brought green beans and mark ,,,, tHAT ANGEL he brought cornbread stuffing do y’all know what i’m talking abt
OOO THAT STUFF IS GOOD
and there’s sweet potatoes and apple pie and all the Thanksgiving Essentials
jisung wanted to be a dick so he brought cranberry jelly
“why don’t you have some:) cranberry preserves:) , jisung” -you, every 30 seconds
everyone sits down to eat and it’s LOUD so you’re like shut UP !!!!!!!!!!
“every1 say smth ur thankful for :3333”
“my family !!!!”
“you guys <3”
“awW BOOO” - everyone, while throwing things at jaemin
“my life !!”
“that i’m happy”
“gay” -chenle
“minecraft”
anyways no one took it seriously until it got to mark
“i’m grateful y/n moved here :))))))”
everyone goes KSKDDIDI and you blush and you’re like okay ily mark JSKKD
everyone EATS A LOT and then you go sit in a pile in the living room
you go to make hot chocolate for everyone and when you come back it’s , interesting how there’s only room for you next to mark . hm
you pass out the hot chocolate and everyone reaches Maximum Sleepytime
at this point you’re too tired to give a fuck and you just flop onto the couch next to mark and curl up into his side
he puts his arm around you to pull you close and this mf presses a tiny barely there kiss to your temple
you look up and like talk with your eyes
did u just
i did
oh
yeah
and then you just settle back down
it’s too crowded in here for any Moves to be Made
bUT YALL BEST BELIEVE WHEN ALL THESE YOUNGINS GET OUT UR HOUSE
you’ve got the karate kid on bc ??? who doesn’t love the karate kid and all of your cutie friends are asleep in various places
but once it gets super late you start waking people up and going hey i love you but your mom called mine like 8 times you gotta gO
you make sure everyone is awake fully if they’re driving and to text you when they got home safe
at long last
you’re alone
in your house
with mark
actually where is mark
mark has disappeared ?????
you start looking around for him and find him in your room ???
“you snoopin thru my things ??!?!??”
he jumps and is like uHH but you’re like nah you’re fine idc
so he continues and he was really just lookin at what kind of books you have and the little drawings and paintings and knick knacks everywhere
you just sit on your bed and observe him
let’s be real he’s nice to look at and you’d be perfectly fine doing this for uhhh the rest of your life
he pulls a book off your shelf and starts flipping through it until he pauses at a page
and his face blooms into this big smile and he looks hella giddy
and you’re like uhh hey whatcha lookin at there bud
and he just keep smiling and it’s a little smug now wtf
“when were you reading this?”
“oh uh i don’t know i got it this summer at that cute little bookshop”
“was it, by chance, the day we met?”
“i mean maybe??? why ????”
and he shows you the page and it’s tHAT oNE WHERE YOU WERE DOODLING BITS OF HIM AND WRITING HIS NAME ALL OVER IT
FUCK !!!!!!!
you immediately turn tomato red and snatch the book in to hold it tightly to your chest
“uhhh i do that with uhhhh eVerYONE I MEET”
“aw i thought i was special:((((”
he’s creeping closer to you this whole time until he’s INCHES AWAY
he gently pulls the book out of your hands and places it aside before grabbing your wrists and uncrossing your arms
“personally, i think it’s really cute”
you blush even more this man knows what he’s doing
you mumble a thanks with your eyes trained on his fuzzy socks what a dork
he releases one of your wrists to push your chin up so he can look you in the eyes
“do you really do that with everyone you meet?”
“,,,,,,, no it’s just you”
“alright cool”
and then he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you close til you’re pressed together chest to chest AW
he nudges his nose against yours and you close your eyes because your god daMN HEART IS POUNDING AND YOU CANT LOOK DIRECTLY INTO THOSE BIG PUPPY EYES
he presses the sweetest and gentlest of kisses to each cheek and then to the top of your nose
he presses one last lingering kiss on your forehead before he tilts his chin down to press your lips together
it’s so soft and innocent wow i’m going to SHED TEARS WRITING THIS
and he pulls away and you press your face into his neck in embarrassment
he chuckles a lil and rubs your back, leaning his cheek against your head
“hey, you down there”
you say “yeah?” but your voice is muffled by his neck and it’s more like eh ???
“my girlfriend y/n will you be ???”
what the fuck
you pull your head back so you can look at his face which is turning steadily redder
“uh what”
“shIT uh i meant will you uh bemygirlfriend”
your confused expression turns into a shit eating grin and you’re like
“what was that :)))) i didn’t hear you :)))))”
he groans and rests his forehead on your shoulder and pitifully whines out
“please be my girlfriend :(((((“
you pick his face up and hold it between your palms and he pouts playfully
“well how could i say no to that face”
and you smooch him right on those lil pouted lips
“yes i’ll be your girlfriend”
he smiles real big and smooshes you against him aw
wow so now you’re mark lee’s gf
LUCKY BITCH
lowkey you get a few threats but as soon as mark catches wind of that he stands on the statue in front of the school and announces that if anyone has a problem with you they’ve got a problem with him !!!!
and he looks like: ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
you drag him down while apologizing to everyone in the general vicinity
mark is. veRY CLINGY NOW
i mean no complaints here it’s just
wow
you’ll be standing at your locker when BAM mark is wrapped around you from behind and you get a hey baby how’s ur day right in your ear
in gym class he restrains himself since the coaches are always like LEE KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF
but he always whines after and is like
:((((( but you look so cute in my shirt i wanna squish you
whenever mark comes over you force him to let you draw him at least once
each time it gets easier since you’ve started to memorize the details of his face and the knuckles of his hands and the shape of his shoulders
a lot of times he just comes over to watch movies and talk
he’s not an eloquent guy
(“you all look like pretty grass :)))” - mark lee)
but he gets what he needs to say out and he enjoys listening to you talk about whatever’s on your mind
you’ve started a glow in the dark star sticker collection to put on your ceiling and each time he comes over you put a constellation up there
so you’ll lay in bed and turn off the lights and just stare at the ceiling and try to name them all
soon you’ll just get sleepy though and press your face into his chest
he uwu’s every time :((((
after he’s done being astonished by his Baby™️ he’ll wrap his arms around you and stroke a hand up and down your spine wow
Real Relaxation Hours
your mom will come home and find y’all asleep and then SHE uwu’s and it’s just one big cute MESS
he loves to kiss you right as he’s leaving like he’ll lay one on you then RUN to the bus stop
p.s. maurice is on y’all every day saying he called it AY
his other favorite kisses are when he catches you off guard and just turns you around and kisses you and you’re like
I’m Confused But I Like This
lots of sweet pecks throughout the day and then longer slower stuff when you’re home and alone and relaxing
leaves hickeys on your neck literally just to be annoying
it’s oKAY THO DONT TELL HIM YOU LIKE IT
months pass and youve said your first “i love you’s” to each other and renjun is always like so when y’all gettin married huh
you both SMACK him simultaneously
but lowkey you would marry mark he’s the best and you love him so wHY NOT
but it’s early and you know that and you’re happy with what you have now :))))))
pls love and support our hardworking baby mark lee he is doing his best and i love him goodnight
#mark#mark lee#mark lee scenario#mark lee scenarios#mark lee fluff#nct 2018#nct u#nct 127#nct dream#nct dream scenarios#nct scenario#nct scenarios#nct u scenarios#nct u fluff#nct fluff#kpop#kpop scenarios#nct 127 scenarios#y'all best believe I used all the tags my baby boy mark better blow tf up#nct
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w ow look who it is.. bringing back yet another old muse wow what a situation. but hey hi tis kat again with this situation of a muse and he is my second muse ( your admin bud here also plays zero! so this is a sideblog uh huh ). but he’s a cold alpha boi running one of the packs in keisung after vvv brutally killing the other alpha in front of the whole school :) but he’s been here for 10 years but a year and a half ago he took off for a year ( reason being his daughter was justborn and another pack was after him so he had to lead them away ), and just under a month ago he left again in search of a wolf surrogate but he returned a few days ago... uh huh.. all makes sense in his bio
imma post a starter up soon too, but if you are someone that has any ideas for a connection you’d like to try then feel free to hmu because i’m open to anything!
profile
scout was a werewolf from birth, the second oldest beta child of the two alpha’s of what would become the donghae pack, one of the biggest korean wolf packs
he has over 15 brothers, no sisters somehow, but with multiple brothers came a competition between them all, and the biggest being for who would be the next alpha in line, and as far as anyone was concerned, only the oldest was really thought about for that
either way, apparently that wasn’t the case, because after years he began showing the major side of an alpha from a young age
though even as a boy, he did love playing, mostly with the beta’s of the pack as they always ran around playing and play fighting, and it was the most fun to him really
for the most part though, scout was only raised around his pack, still allowed into the towns and such too, but they mostly spent their time around his own species because they had a very strong connection between themselves anyway
but still, scout wasn’t always called scout, he was known as no yongjoon before he was known as scout, but that story isn’t the nicest because no yongjoon is a dead werewolf, a traitor of a werewolf
it’s all because of his oldest brother too, a boy that is far too envious of everything to do with scout because he was supposed to be the alpha, he was supposed to take over the pack and be the golden child, not scout, and that’s how everything unfolds
just over 200 years old, preparing to take over the pack as he was supposed to - it’s the night before a full moon when his brother finally makes him snap
the male has been slowly testing his anger for years now, making him more aggressive and irritable than possible, until he finally flips on the full moon
anger drive, scout doesn’t even remember entirely what happens, he doesn’t know it all anyway - but the truth of it all is that when scout flips in wolf form, he attacks anyone he comes in sight with, a feral wolf truly as he kills some of his pack members, innocent civilians even, until the kill count gets over 60 within two nights
when he comes back too, he’s laying on the forest floor with no memories of the night, only that he’s messed up royally and no longer are his eyes a golden colour, but now a bright red that tells the tales enough of what he’s truly done, and his brothers come in major form to let him know just how angry they are at him
apparently anyway, he’d killed one of his younger brothers in the situation that had unfolded, and soon enough they found him and attacked him, both in wolf and human form they came together to rip up his skin and his body, to attack him completely - but the worst becomes when his oldest brother claws down his face, permanently damaging his right eye and leaving a grotesque scar in it’s wake
but maybe it’s wise when scout pretends he’d dead, pretends to die then and there on the forest floor as he bleeds out for all the wounds as they leave him there
but he doesn’t die. no yongjoon the supposed to be alpha wolf dies, but that is when scout wakes up instead
he goes it alone, runs away and goes off on his own instead because that’s all he can do, though the story of the werewolf that completely destroyed his pack and innocent lives, it becomes well known around the supernatural community - only they think he’s dead
scout isn’t though, and anyone that finds out who he is or what he did, he kills them and adds them to the list of bodies piling up behind his back.. an omega now as a lone wolf, but he doesn’t let it hurt him.. he needs to keep going
ten years ago is when he finds himself walking up to keisung academy, years after the incident and offered a place to enrol.. which he does as he keeps to himself for the most part anyway, or well at first, but it doesn’t take long for him to be initiated into a pack - the new moon pack
he joins them, despite his judgement being against it anyway, though it doesn’t take scout any more than a year to challenge the alpha in the middle of the school courtyard
it isn’t a long fight, and with both in wolf form, it doesn’t take long for scout to rip out the throat of the pack’s alpha.. securing his place instead as the new alpha to not be challenged - in his own defence anyway, the original alpha had been a dick and scout really wasn’t having it
but 10 years later, and he’s still the sole alpha of the new moon pack within keisung, and people have found it wise not to challenge him.. or to question his past which still remains a mystery to all
so the kid thing i mentioned at the start - scout dated a girl in his pack they both knew it wouldn’t last bcos #imprint but they did like each other and basically she imprinted but not before they found out she was pregnant with his kid. so kid is born, her name is mirae and she’s just over a year old and she’s the sweetest lil thing but like it’s 50/50 on people actually knowing he has a daughter and some is just rumour others just know but yea.. also ex does not live on campus anymore for his daughter’s safety but she is still in his pack
speaking of imprints tho scout imprinted on soohan like half a year ago and after a lot of fighting they are in love
also hyunbin is his baby brother if u hurt him he’ll kill u k thx
personality:
he’s like the best kind of leader guy you can have really, like he’s a good alpha despite how intimidating and cold he can come off with it, but his pack does mean a lot to him even if he told himself he’d never let himself get close to another pack again
but he’s aggressive and he lets it show in the fact that he doesn’t hesitate standing his ground and making sure that his orders are followed and his dominance is known
but for the most part, he does still come off as more recluse than anything really, like he is still kind of on the more loner side for his own reasons, but he doesn’t want anyone finding out about his past and i can guarantee it’s not a good idea to question his red eye okay or the massive scar on his face and over his whole body
guarantee the happiest you’ll see him tho is with mirae or soohan tbh, it’s when he’s more carefree and more like who yongjoon was not scout
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Discover an Explosive New Parrot Training System
Discover an Explosive New Parrot Training System Honest Review
Product Name: Discover an Explosive New Parrot Training System
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Discover an Explosive New Parrot Training System Scam or legit?
Description:
For All Parrot Lovers Who Want A Happier, Even Hilarious Bird…
1. Yelling at your Parrot to “SHUT UP” when it screams 2. Over-reacting and shouting “OOOH”, “AAAH” or “OUCH” whenever it bites 3. Giving your Parrot only seeds to eat 4. Placing the cage near the window overlooking the garden 5. Putting your Parrot above chest level 6. Having a single perch in your Parrot’s cage7. Placing the food and water bowls just beneath the perch8. Placing your new Parrot on your shoulders…
Even if you are doing any one of the above, you are inadvertently snowballing bad Parrot behavior. It’s time you correct your Parrot handling techniques to become a perfect Parrot parent in just 15 easy days…”
( A Parrot Lover For The Last 12 Years)
Not even the worst blood-drawing
biters, crystal-shattering screamers, or stubborn,
party-pooper non-talkers have a chance to resist these powerful
Parrot training techniques… get your
Parrot to do exactly what you want
with ease…
All in record time!… Super easy, NEVER
using punishment!
The Really Great Part Is, Your
Parrot Will Love You More For It!
“Wow! This Stuff
Really Works…”
“In just under 2 weeks I have gone from a quivering, tearful, frustrated bird rescuer, to the proud owner of Dylan, the Parrot who in his own words is ‘alright’…. Thank you for your information…” (Josette Bellham, Lowestoft, UK.)
“Your training info has done a great amount with my Parrot … My bird now is very friendly towards everybody and looks forward to getting out of his cage and onto people’s hands.” (Stella Lam, Danville, Virginia.)
“Thank you so much for your training info, it has worked wonders with my Parrot Sam, his talking has improved, and I am much more confident in handling him and understanding him.” (Pauline Chamberlain)
“We were about to find him a new home. However, your techniques regarding responding to shrieking episodes have worked. He is much more calm and playful. His biting attempts, handled in the way you suggest (moving into the bite) have dropped considerably, and he is not biting as hard.” (Terry Clark, Los Gatos, California)
“Wow I cant believe it! Its already starting to work, today I had D.J. on my hand, which he would never do, unless I had a towel on my hand because he would bite me vicously, but… now i can acctually hold and pet him! What a difference!” (Ashley Bratt, League City, Texas)
**********
“This book puts its ideas into terms that you can understand, many things not thought of by the general population such as bathing, preventing illness… useful tips about cage placement… and definite direction as to WHAT NOT TO DO. I would reccmmend this book to anyone interested in learning more about having birds as house pets of any breed. (Brenda A. La Platte, Jupiter, Florida)
Dear Parrot Lover,
I want to tell you a true story that’s on the edge of potentially scandalizing you…
About 13 years ago, a good friend
of mine, Wayne, “rescued” Parrot
that showed up mysteriously on his back porch balcony one day.
He came right in the house when offered
a cracker, and woofed it down like a ravenous feathered pig…
the poor, lost fellow was obviously very hungry.
Well, Wayne, being a good guy, kept
him in the house (he didn’t have a cage), and tried to locate
the owner of the lost Parrot by putting an ad in the local paper.
Nobody responded to the “Lost Parrot”
insertion… and in the end, Wayne ended up becoming an unexpected
Parrot owner, as
he never did find the original owners.
In the meantime, Wayne named the
playful and friendly fellow “Polygon”. And to his shock, Polygon
talked… and it wasn’t just “Hello” he was saying. Polygon’s
chatting was a little more “complicated”…
“I want
pot seeds”
Huh?!… pot seeds??? Were the
ex-owners giving this bird marijuana seeds? Perhaps they were
tasty, perhaps Polygon was even getting high!? I really don’t
know, I just know that Polygon loved to say this (I
heard it myself many times).
Wayne thought it was pretty funny,
even though he didn’t smoke or drink. That is… he thought
it was funny until guests came over… then it stopped being
funny fast!
Wayne had to do some serious explaining
to his dubious, and shocked guests that HE wasn’t giving Polygon
pot seeds and getting his friendly bird drugged out!
And it wasn’t the only thing Polygon
said…
One day when I went to visit Wayne and Polygon, Wayne excitedly waved me over, “Nathalie, listen to this…”, he then called out “Whoa…” and Polygon called right back…
“Whoa
Baby! Light my fire!”
Wayne and I laughed so hard it
brought tears to our eyes!
Polygon had just made me become
a passionate Parrot lover. I never
imagined that Parrots could be so
charming and funny, and I never really had even imagined owning
one.
For the last 12 years, I’ve learned
A LOT about these feathered friends, mostly through the school
of hard knocks (or should I say “bites”)! I’ve gathered literally
hundreds of tips and tricks on how to keep happy and healthy
Parrots, and if you
let me, I want to share this knowledge with you to help YOU successfully
resolve any Parrot challenge you
might be facing.
I want to share with you my passionate
quest to have the happiest, healthiest, and funniest
Parrots possible!
Does this
sound like such a far away dream…
to own such a funny, talking Parrot?
Well, know that this dream is
not difficult to achieve with the right knowledge.
I mean, I too have certainly
discovered that not all Parrots
are like Polygon at first…
Are you dealing with sore, even
bloody fingers (bitten to death), ringing ears (those sonic
screams), or simply Parrot that
refuses to speak… and you have no clue why he is mute as a
fish, bites, or screams, despite your best determined efforts?
I bet you didn’t realize owning
Parrot would be so emotionally
involving, perhaps a nerve-wracking challenge, even outright
dangerous in some cases!
Dang!
Parrots can BITE!!!
If you haven’t already noticed,
when some of these guys bite, they don’t mess around… we’re
talking about beaks that mother nature designed to crack open
hard nuts, or rip through tough wood. You don’t want these razor-sharp
“feathered-pruners” snapping at your soft fingers… or worse…
towards ears and eyes that look like leaves and fruit to an
untrained, frightened, or frustrated Parrot…
And when your
Parrot becomes, or IS already, a constant screamer?
Well, you already know… you’d
be better off having a 16 year old rebel teen-ager in your home,
who dreams of being a worshipped Rock Star, with his new Gibson
electric guitar, distortion pedal, 200 watt Kenwood amplifier,
and truckload of speakers… the point being…
Holy
smokes! Parrots can SCREAM!!!
You know it’s getting bad
when your guests involuntarily spill their drinks after a 80-decibel
Parrot scream,
or when someone sits down quickly, holding their heart, worried that
they may be going into cardiac arrest!
Some birds even scream at
night… talk about a sleepless, wide-awake nightmare… and
not just for you, also for your local angry neighborhood!
But I’ll leave that (hopefully) just to your imagination…
because it won’t match THAT awful reality.
But
enough scary Parrot talk…
I’m not here to talk you
out of getting Parrot, nor do
I want to scare you into the !TRAGEDY!
of dumping a “misbehaving” Parrot
off at the local pet shop, nor do I want to inspire the bird-brained
idea of setting Parrot “free”
at some local park (yes this unfortunately happens out of ignorance
and desperation)…
And no, pot seeds will
NOT cure your Parrot! That was just
a funny memory I shared to illustrate that Parrots can and WILL say the craziest things once they start talking.
And apart from the fact that Polygon’s ex-owners might have
been irresponsibly giving him pot seeds, he was obviously
very well treated and well trained to be such a happy and talkative
bird.
What I want to talk to
you about is a very easy way to STOP and PREVENT ANY
Alfred Hitchcock style feathered nightmare… I want to show
you how to own a loving, talking, tricking, playful, and colorful
feathered angel… like Polygon.
The good news is you really can do something
about your current Parrot situation
and improve it dramatically. You just need to understand your
little guy, and then act accordingly with proven training techniques
to keep him or her as your colorful “best of buds friends” in your
home.
(Friends don’t bite and scream, and they
are hopefully politely potty-trained).
It’s time you easily understand your Parrot’s simple needs, train him or her with techniques that work honest-to-goodness wonders, to live the constant, heart warming pleasure of keeping a Parrot that talks and plays like a small child, often so funny that they make you laugh to tears… And avoid the all-too-often tragic nightmare of a “ferocious caged rat with feathers”.
That was meant to be a funny
exaggeration, but a mean
Parrot that bites hard, or an ear-shattering screamer
that gives you and your neighbors ZERO peace, or even a frightened,
terrified Parrot that sees YOU as
a giant evil monster, is far from funny, and no laughing matter…
We’re talking tears and blood… and it’s
time to stop or prevent this bad behavior for good, or before
it ever happens, and inspire the positive fun behavior, like
talking and tricking… starting today!
Who would put their
Parrot in a closet?
Fortunately, (and unfortunately)
only a small handful of Parrot owners
put their birds in a closet, or some
other unpleasant location, but it happens, more out of ongoing
desperation than cruelty…
No mean punishment will EVER
get your Parrot to snap out of his
“destructive or stubborn spoil-sport ways”… don’t force, you’ll
only make things worse!
There’s a FAR easier, and
an infinitely more effective way to get your bird to behave
and perform… that can literally:
Start The
Talking And Singing… Not just “hello”
… get him to beg and plead for mercy till he gets
his favorite treat… greet you when you walk in the door with
such an upbeat message that your spirits rise, even get him
to sing like a star, and ring like a phone (tricking your friends),
you’ll never know what sort of silliness he’ll say or imitate
next… could be hilarious, and watch out, it could be shockingly
embarrassing!
Perform
Hilarious Tricks… Amaze your friends and family…
and simply have great fun with your Parrot
(he’ll love it too)… kind of like having an in-house circus
star…
Glow In
Radiant Health … A healthy
Parrot is a happier Parrot, that is far more likely to
behave well. Learn everything you need to know to keep your
Parrot
shining and bright, avoiding disease and injury.
Stop The Biting…Save your
fingers from painful sharp bites quickly by using a few powerful
training techniques that work outright wonders in less than 15 days,
only 30 minutes a day… you won’t believe it when your bird
hops onto your hand without taking a bad habit snap at your
poor fingers!
Stop The
Screaming… Save your ears, and sanity
from ear-shattering screams… the problem could be just the
position of your Parrot’s cage,
or one of many factors that makes him scream, find out, and
stop this fast.
Stop The
Messy Poops… Can’t stop mother nature, but
you can get your bird to aim better and become potty
trained!
Save Your Wallet… from
very costly vet, or personal expert trainer bills… you can do everything regarding training on
your own when you have the right knowledge base.
Save Your
Heart… from breaking, because you know something’s
not right with your Parrot… you
just don’t know what the heck it is…
Understand Your
Parrot
So Well…
It’s VERY simple common sense… that can give you real results immediately
and amazing results within 15 days or less!
Listen, if you own or want to own a Parrot, the least you need to do is dedicate 15 minutes a day to this creature. Make it real quality time that gives you amazing results…
Parrot Secrets
has the
very simple goal of helping you make your
Parrot happy and healthy, with knowledge
and training techniques that will allow you to achieve this
goal in flying colors!
A happy,
understood, properly
fed, and healthy Parrot will
be nothing short of deep joy, hilarious fun
, and affectionate love within your home…
now, teach your Parrot to talk,
sing, play, snuggle, even do astonishing tricks with ease! Your
happy Parrot
will most likely even surprise you, and do this on his or her
own!
“…Aside from this bird, your training was the smartest
purchase I ever made.”
I have to thank you so much for your training course for
my Parrot JoJo.
I adopted him from someone who abused him terribly. He
had chewed one of his toes off (before I got him 4 months
ago) because he was put on a wet floor that was just washed
with Mr. Clean and not rinsed or dried. He ended up in
the basement of this person’s home with no attention.
His chest & thighs were completely picked apart –
he was naked! The only feathers he had were on his head
& wings.
He was very, very skiddish and would hardly let me put
food in his bowl or give him fruit without wanting to
bite my fingers off. He hardly spoke out of fear. He would
growl like an angry dog waiting for his slab of meat.
After your training course, I cannot believe the trust
i have gained with him. It is incredible. I am now part
of his “flock” and know that he loves me.
He gives me kisses on my cheek, takes showers with me,
he waves, plays games with me, eats dinner with me and
his feathers are coming back! We are now working on his
potty training…..That’s our next endeavor….He even
gets along with my cats and they play together.
I am amazed how fast this training has taken off. I am
more shocked than anything. Nothing else was working,
I listened to what the vet suggested and it just wasn’t
working out.
I cannot thank you enough, and aside from this bird, your
training was the smartest purchase I have ever made. Every
day we learn new things together.
This course in less than 2 weeks has changed both of our lives… Thank YOU, again!!!
Jennifer Clark, New Hyde Park, New York, USA
“…His biting attempts, handled in the way you suggest… have dropped considerably…”
I ordered the training materials to assist in working with our parrot, who had developed the habit of ear-piercing shrieking and random biting, hard enough to draw blood. We were about to find him a new home.
However, your techniques regarding responding to shrieking episodes have worked. He is much more calm and playful. His biting attempts, handled in the way you suggest (moving into the bite) have dropped considerably, and he is not biting as hard.
Despite owning and reading two bird books, we were unaware of the accurate information regarding hours of light he should experience in a day, and hours of darkness needed, and we have adjusted his schedule.
He is clearly a more content bird. Thank you.
Terry Clark Los Gatos, California
“…Wow I cant believe it! Its already starting to work,… He has already made a big change”
Wow I cant believe it! Its already starting to work, today I had D.J. on my hand, which he would never do, unless I had a towel on my hand because he would bite me vicously, but today I tried the thing where you pet him with the sticks on each side then move closer with my hands and that made alot of progress, then I had him on my hand, I would let him bite me then he got really confused so he would then he just nibble.
He has already made a big change, now i can acctually hold and pet him! What a difference!
Ashley Bratt, League City, Texas
“…As You Can Imagine This Was Driving Me Crazy… He
Is Now Happier Than Ever.”
I’d first like to tell you just a bit about our Parrot
Dylan. We never planned to have a bird or indeed
ever even thought about getting one. However, our
son, Scott, rescued him in a local park with the aid of
a quaver crisp.
Poor little thing was very, very frightened and used to
spend all day literally screaming which as you can imagine
was driving me crazy, right up to the point of wanting
to find him a new home.
Hence I looked on the net and found your training course.
I am glad to say that he has now stopped screaming within
just a few days after I read your course. He is now happier
than ever as we have such a nice long chat with him several
times a day.
He is such an intelligent little bird. He woolf
whistles, whistles little tunes we have taught him, and
we also ask him every day “are you alright?” to which
he replies “I’m alright are you alright?”! He
is such a star and I am so grateful to have found your information.
In just under 2 weeks I have gone from a quivering, tearful,
frustrated bird rescuer, to the proud owner of Dylan the
Parrot who in his own words is “alright”.Thank you for your information which has helped
me understand so much more.
Josette Bellham, Lowestoft, UK
Here are the four ebooks that you
will find in Parrot Secrets
and the essential
Parrot knowledge you will find in each digital book.BOOK ONE
: How to Get Your Parrot To Talk
And Do Astonishing Tricks
Mute as a fish? Discover
the best way to inspire your Parrot
to talk more. (See Page 3)
How to use an under-estimated
“old” powerful training technique that has just been
rediscovered in the Parrot world…
the “Positive Reinforcement Technique”… that will help you
tremendously to teach your Parrot
to say the funniest stuff in front of your friends and family, perhaps
even within a few days or hours! (See
Page 3)…
Discover the 3 easiest words
for your Parrot to learn
that you should consider teaching your Parrot to say first,
before you teach it anything else. It’s likely you will get
far better results if you teach your Parrot
to say these 3 words first before you teach it to say any other
words. See Page 5 to find out what
these 3 words are…
Is it worth persevering when
your Parrot is as silent as a tomb?
(YES!) and how long can it take, if your
Parrot doesn’t talk right away?
(See Page 5)…
One major factor that might prevent
your Parrot from talking… and the simple things that you should do in order to avoid
this. (See Page 6)…
Strategic phone placement tips… Discover why it can be SO important for you to put your telephone somewhere near your Parrot’s cage, but be careful… (See Page 6)…
Training warnings…
Once your Parrot starts talking,
you may have an undesired critic that gets you in hot water,
not a fun chatter! (See Page 6)…
How to use the audio tapes and
CDs that you may already own to teach your
Parrot to speak, and when they are most effective.
(See Page 7)…
Real communication, not just “Bird” talk… How you will be able to amaze your
friends and your family by teaching your
Parrot to say “I want a grape” every time it wants to
have a grape! (See Page 7)…
The 2 special “indicator” ready-to-talk
signs that you need to watch out for in order to know
when your Parrot is ready to begin
learning how to speak. (See Page 9)…
What is the best time of the day to teach your Parrot to speak? Is it mornings, afternoons or evenings? Many people get this crucial thing wrong and their Parrots never learn to speak! (See Page 9 for the correct answer and why)…
Don’t push it! What is the maximum amount of time that you should devote to each training session with your Parrot in order to get the best results? Is it 15 minutes, 30 minutes, 1 hour, or 2 hours? Once again, many Parrot owners get this crucial step wrong and their Parrots may never learn to speak! (See Page 9)…
10 secret TOP Parrot trainer
tips that will help you to teach your
Parrot to talk in 15 days or less!
(See Pages 9,10, and 11)…
Hilarious ongoing conversation… How you can teach your Parrot
to not only say a few words and phrases every now and then,
but also to actually carry on an intelligent conversation with
you for several minutes! Can you imagine the look of sheer astonishment
on the faces of your friends and your family when they see you
doing this? They would have never thought that this was possible!
(See Page 11)…
Warning: Mean Parrot Creator?
A terrible training mistake that you
should stop immediately if you are doing this as it can actually
make your Parrot mean!
(See Page 12)
How to dramatically increase
your Parrot’s vocabulary. Did you know that some Parrots can have a vocabulary of several
hundred words? (See Page 12)….
How to train your
Parrot to do tricks with ease
(See Pages 13 and 14)…
3 fun tricks, “Perch On T-Stand”, “The Wave”, and “Shake Hands” that you can quickly and easily teach your Parrot to do to start the trick learning process. (See Pages 13 and 14)…
I have been very pleased. I have read and listened
to everything I can get my hands on to date, and your
course, Parrot Secrets
, has been the most helpful.
It’s critical to begin training a companion Parrot correctly
as soon as possible to avoid future behavioral issues.
A solid knowledge base is key, and your
Parrot Secrets
course has
helped me with that.
I received your course about a week ago now. I have a
4 1/2 month old bird. To date, Yuri can wave,
do the ‘big eagle’ and best of all…he is potty trained. All of this without any negative reinforcement.
As a bonus, he’s stopped nipping and is thoroughly comfortable
with being handled, even though I did not specifically
address these issues. A very nice bonus of training!!!!
Brooks wrote back a few days later saying:
I’ve gotten another bird since we last corresponded as
well, and in three days she’s step up/down trained, AND she’s
potty trained!
Thanks for the training tips!!!!
Brooks Conforti Littleton, Colorado, USA
Your training course has done a great amount with my Parrot . At first my Parrot wouldn’t even step onto my hand, but with your training course I was not only able to get him to step onto my hand but I was also able to teach him how to shake my hand through the Wave.
My Parrot now is very friendly towards everybody and looks
forward to getting out of his cage and onto people’s hands.
Stella Lam Danville, Virginia, USA.
Thank you so much for your training course it has worked
wonders with my Parrot Sam, his talking has improved,
and I am much more confident in handling him and understanding
him.
I would highly recommend the training course to anyone who owns a Parrot or is thinking of buying one. The course offers so much help and understanding with Parrots. I have bought books about Parrots before but none have been so helpful and easy to understand as your training course.
I can honestly say that all your hard work and effort
you have put into this training course have benefited
me and my Parrot.
Pauline Chamberlain Essex, United Kingdom
I liked the course I purchased from you.The e- books were very easy to download and I like how you broke down the categories so I can go directly to what I need to know. Each category is easy to understand and very much into detail. My bird has learned how to wave and he is only 5 months old. We are now working with shaking hands.
I have a parrot that is aggressive about his cage and he don’t like to be petted, so I am using 2 wooden dowels as you talked about so I can tame him enough to pet him. The e- book on bird health is GREAT!!! There was so much I didn’t know about this topic. But having this information makes me feel that I will keep my babies as healthy as possible.
You need to keep the e-books coming and I will refer you to anyone that has birds and would like to become more educated. Thank you so much for helping me with my birds!
Wanda Bucklew, Cobbs Creek, Virginia
I have had parrots before, and did not really expect much of them (and to be honest they developed bad habits that drove me absolutely crazy)! Of course, I want totally eager to get another when my daughter asked, but after reading your book I can now see where I went wrong before!
Parrots are actually very intelligent and friendly pets! My family and I have applied your “secrets” and we have not only learned a great deal about the species, but have also had great results! Our parrot is very much a part of our family! We have even established a evening routine. Of course, the kids let him out daily after school, but during the afternoon/evening routine, is the part I enjoy most.
“Purple” as we call him, is so affectionate and social I can hardly believe it! My previous birds flew away from us, biting us if we ever got too close, but Purple actually flies to us! He goes from one family member to the next, over and over (even my “rowdy” 3-year old) and affectionately “cleans” or “kissing” each of us as he goes along. He is even attempting to make friends with our cat!
Thank you for being interested in your customers!
I am looking forward to reading your entire book, because I know there is much more to learn.
Jennifer Calate Sacramento, California
I have been meaning to write and let you know how very useful and informative I found your bird training course. As a first-time Parrot owner I was impressed with the wealth of information on my bird’s diet, health and behaviour. The section on interpreting my bird’s body language was particularly useful as it taught me to gauge T’wee’s moods and determine how and when to approach him just by watching what he does.
Prior to reading the training course, I had only a limited idea of the intelligence, memory and learning capabilities of parrots. Now my adolescent bird is talking and singing a blue streak, yawning every time we say “night-night” to him, and learning to shake hands. Your course has enabled me and my family to bring out the best in our bird; we enjoy teaching and playing with him and are constantly amazed at how quickly he is able to learn new things using the simple but effective methods we have learned from your e-book.
I recommend it to any bird owner who wants the best for their pet
I will read your course over and over again, it is a great reference guide.
I immediately purchased your training course for fear of ending up with an uncontrollable bird. Cheeky did not want to come to me but ran from me and nipped a little. I started putting Cheeky with me in the kitchen when I cooked, he sits in an old colander hanging above my sink, and I also take Cheeky in the shower with me just to spend some quality time. Much better and is not so nippy. Cheeky is also starting to try to talk too. I started with something simple. I make the kissy sound then say Kiss Kiss.
After the first day, Cheeky started to try to repeat the word. The kissy sound is perfect but the words Kiss Kiss still are somewhat scratchy. I’m sure he will improve. I thouroughly have faith in your training course and am sure Cheeky will come a long way. Thanks from Cheeky and I
Ginger L. Wagner Harleysville, Pennsylvania
I’ve got the info for you. These
are the stunning techniques that stopped even really wild and
mean birds from biting, real life stuff on film, put on paper
in easy to follow steps. They work better and faster than any
other technique I’ve ever seen.
I’ll say it again… they
work better and faster than any other technique I’ve ever seen…
In less than 2 weeks, your
Parrot biting and screaming problems will be dramatically
reduced, perhaps even sooner. And you will also learn how to
PREVENT any such bad behavior from EVER surfacing.
This is a special ebook
that I have permission to share with you when you order, but please don’t hesitate, because I can’t guarantee for how
long the author will allow me to share this info with you before
he decides to sell it himself exclusively.
BOOK TWO
: “How To Get My Parrot To Love Me”
Look
at what’s inside…
Discover this expert bird training author’s personal favorite solution on how to fix
your Parrot’s behavioral problems,
that your
Parrot will LOVE!
(See Page 1)…
Watch the amount of light
your Parrot gets…
Exactly how many hours of sunlight should your
Parrot get every day? Giving it more than the recommended
number of hours of sunlight can make your
Parrot start screaming! Right now, you could very
well be unknowingly giving your Parrot
much more sunlight than what it should be getting! (
See Page 6)…
Does your
Parrot scream? Or are you afraid that your
Parrot
might start screaming in the future? Find out more about
a brilliant new technique to prevent your
Parrot from screaming. You will also read about a
real-life case study in which a bird that used to regularly
scream upwards of 45 minutes at a stretch every day was
trained to stop screaming altogether!
(See Page 6)
How should you react to
a screaming Parrot?…
see the most common mistakes most Parrot
owners make that only make this worse!
(see Page 7)
How to cure the habit of
screaming in already pampered and spoiled
Parrots. (See Page 7)…
How to figure out the exact
reason as to why your Parrot
is biting you (See Pages
8-10)…
The key to training a Parrot to stop biting is to figure out why it has the habit of biting in the first place. If you have figured that out, you have already won half the battle.
Pages 8-10 of
this book will give you a step-by-step scientifically proven
process by which you can determine why your
Parrot bites you.
How to permanently
stop your Parrot from biting, once you have figured out why it bites…
(See Pages 8-13)…
How to cure the habit
of biting in pampered and spoiled Parrots (See Pages 10-13)…
If you have a baby
Parrot, you could be rightly worried that it may start biting
when it grows older, even though you spend a lot
of time with it. Find out how to ensure that your baby
Parrot will never bite once it grows older…
(See Page 8)
Powerful real-life biting case study…The famous real-life story
and case study of how the author got an extremely aggressive bird who used to fiercely bite anyone who came near it
to not only stop biting altogether but also to actually
lie on its back to be cuddled by humans and enjoy being
pet on its tummy! If your Parrot
bites you, you can implement the same secret and closely guarded
techniques to not only stop it from biting, but also to actually
WANT to be pet by you! No Parrot
owner who cares even a bit about his/her
Parrot can afford to miss this famous case study!
(See
Page 9)…
Important tips to help
you recognize biting tendencies coming from natural breeding
desires, and how you should handle your
Parrot when it is in breeding mode.
(See Page 9)…
Discover a surprisingly
powerful but extremely simple strategy to stop biting
in smaller Parrots, or bigger Parrots that aren’t breaking
the skin. Learn how the author got another bird who had
the habit of biting him every time he wanted to have him
step up onto his finger to stop biting him in just 2 weeks
flat (and how YOU can too)! (See Page
9)…
What if your
Parrot bites extremely hard? Learn a break-through
technique called “perching” to stop your
Parrot from biting… developed by the author that
is hands down the BEST method and even allows you to tame
your Parrot without getting
bitten once! (See Page 11)…
Important tips on where
your Parrot should be in relation
to you while you are training it.
(See Page 11)…
Discover the best place
in your house to train your Parrot
most effectively. (See Page
12)..
Learn where exactly
in your home you should put your Parrot’s cage. This crucial decision can make or break
your relationship with your Parrot
and can determine whether your Parrot
is healthy and playful or lonely and depressed!
(See Pages 1-2)
Important cage placement
details…Once you have determined which room to
put your Parrot’s cage in, where
should you put the cage – in the center of the room, or in
one of the corners? This will determine whether your
Parrot is friendly and good-natured or fierce and aggressive.
The correct answer will definitely surprise you!
(See Page 2 for the correct answer)…
Discover the truth… cage
near a window? A lot of Parrot
owners put their Parrot’s cage
beside a window. Is that a good idea and should you do the
same? (See Page 2)…
Should you put your
Parrot’s cage on the ground or should you put it higher up in the
air? (See Page 2 for the answer)…
How many toys should
you put in your Parrot’s cage? (See Page 3) …
3 simple toys that
your Parrot will absolutely LOVE!
(See Page 3)…
Shower frequency
and feather plucking … Do you know exactly how
many times a week your Parrot
needs to have a bath during the summer? During the winter? Lack
of attention here can cause your Parrot
to start plucking its feathers! (See
Page 3 to find out the correct answer)…
3 very important
benefits and tips to consider while bathing your
Parrot… (See Page
3)…
How to control your
Parrot’s adolescent behavior (See
Page 5)…
The best way to deal
with changes in your Parrot’s
attitude and behavior once it starts to mature
(See Page 5)…
The only correct way of handling your Parrot when it is in breeding mode (See Page 5 and Page 9)…
My husband and I have started taking showers with our bird named Cosmo. He absolutely LOVES it and I would never have tried without reading your book. His screeching and screaming (which is the reason I purchased her e-book) has also died down considerably. We leave the room completely and go back in and praise him when he stops. We have also learned that remaining calm and speaking softly to him but not leaving our seats until he stops works remarkably well as well.
Thank you so much for putting you ideas in writing! He is so much more enjoyable (in his adolescent years)!
Thanks – Terry & Renée St. John
Renée St. John Norway, Maine
I had the opportunity to be able to use your training on my new parrot and I’m very satisfied with the results I’m getting. I started the course by reading the material on Getting your bird to love you and which bird to buy. To be honest the bird was kind of shy when she came home about 1 week ago and she was biting my fingers, so I did as you have said to let her bite them and now what she does is that she bites them so soft because she wants me to touch her head with them. She enjoys to be pet.
I’m trying also the part that you teach us how to feed your bird in low quantities so that’s the next step I’ll take. My bird is 4 months old and in the next few days I’ll read the other materials on training her to play games, etc… For now I’m happy to get the response I’m getting from my new friend Paulita Margarita. Thank you very much
Eduardo Aguirre Sunrise, Florida
After reading the Parrot Secrets, my parrot only being here for a few weeks are playing on their homemade wall mounted jungle gym, making their way back to their cage when hungry and thirsty, taking rides on our fingers (even my 4 year old). As I speak to them, I can see direct eye contact, their eyes just light up, we can tell that they are concentrating intently on what we are saying. Though their flying feathers have not come back completely, they are still starting to venture around the house despite the other household pets who watch them, and almost appear to protect them.
This book puts its ideas into terms that you can understand, many things not thought of by the general population such as bathing, preventing illness, trying fresh food snacks and links to where you can buy supplies. There are useful tips about cage placement, ideas on how to make your bird comfortable and happy in any location and definite direction as to WHAT NOT TO DO.
I would reccmmend this book to anyone interested in learning more about having birds as house pets of any breed. Brenda A. La Platte Jupiter, Florida
I just loved the training course. I adopted a parrot 2 years ago and have not been able to train he at all. In his last home he did not have much attention so I have been struggling with bitting and screaming for sometime.
I have been doing the techniques in your course now for about 2 weeks and screaming is less and I am able to hold cocoa. He comes out of his cage and walks the floor to find me.
This course has helped us a lot, to have a nice companion for my family. Cocoa has even calmed down enough to let my youngest of 5 children (1 1/2 year old) pet him with supervision of course. Very nice! I thank you so much for the time and effort.
Christine Donelly Feasterville, Pennsylvania
I love the course, I have two parrots. There was so much Information that seems to work for both of them. I would strongly recommend this training course for anyone who wants a great deal and fantastic customer service. I like the fact that I am not forgotten after the sale and you still send me all kinds of new articles as well as training ideas. Thank you
Richard Lupyak Fayetteville, North Carolina
The very important
optimal Parrot training diet
… How to determine exactly how much food you should give
your Parrot and what kinds, while
training it for the best results, all the while making your
bird even healthier…(See Page 14)…
BOOK THREE
: A Happy Parrot Diet…
Important Tips And Warnings
“…diet
is the most common reason for Parrot
disease…”
A shiny, smart Parrot tip
…How you can turn your Parrot into a glossy-looking, intelligent
and bright bird just by modifying its diet (See
Page 3)…
11 secret psychological tricks (currently known only
by the TOP experts in this field) you can use to persuade and
convince your Parrot to try a new
and improved diet rich in nutrients even if your bird is extremely reluctant to shift to the new diet!
(See Pages 5 and 6)…
Too many seeds? What is the maximum percentage of
your Parrot’s diet that should be composed
of seeds? If you exceed this percentage, it can have really harmful
consequences for the health of your bird!
(See Page 6 for the answer)…
Give ’em power veggies! What are the 2 vegetables that
MUST be included in your Parrot’s
diet? (See Page 7)…
Healthy fun variety…Discover the proper amounts of
different food items that your bird should eat. (See
Page 8)…
Not enough, or too much protein? The optimum percentage
of your Parrot’s diet that should
be composed of proteins is 20%, read some tips to help you raise
or cut back on your Parrot’s protein
level to avoid future health problems… (See
Page 8)…
The most common bird nourishment problem… What is
the optimum percentage of your Parrot’s
diet that should be composed of Vitamin A? And what are the foods
that best supply this critical vitamin?
(See Page 8)…
Your Parrot goes crazy for these
fruits and veggies… The 25 different fruits and vegetables
that your Parrot will love and that
are also extremely good for its health! (See Page 9)
…
The 9 most important diet switching tips that you MUST
keep in mind when you are transferring your Parrot
from its current diet to a more balanced and healthy diet.
(See Pages 10 and 11)…
A secret “beak-watering” Parrot
recipe that is also nourishing and excellent for your bird’s health! Your Parrot will LOVE you for this sumptuous
bird treat! (See Page 12 for complete
details)…
Parrot digestion secrets…
Which specific fruits and vegetables help your Parrot in digestion
(See Pages 14 and 15)…
The 4 most important food preparation rules that you
must follow when you are preparing your Parrot’s food – not following all 4 of these rules can have serious
consequences for your bird’s long-term health!
(See Pages 16 and 17)…
The 11 food items that you should NEVER – ever give to your Parrot under any circumstances. A lot of Parrot owners give these food items to their birds without realizing that they are seriously affecting their birds’ health. Read Page 18 of this book to find out whether you are making the same mistake…
I have found all of your training course very useful.
Indeed, after one day of trying your methods our bird, named Morgan, was saying “hello”.
Now after having him for about 5 weeks he is saying all sorts of things including his name and his favourite at the moment “night night”!
We love him to bits. The methods we have tried are as in your course i.e. Repetition and Association. Morgan easily picks up sounds and phrases and loves to whistle. We spend as much time as possible with Morgan when we are not at work and he is always eager to get out of his cage onto his perch, at first we could not get him out but we put his perch near his cage and after a while he realised he was coming out and is now very noisy if we don’t let him out within minutes of arriving home.
The book about interpreting Parrot body language was very useful to us because we now know when he is happy and when he is not.
Also, your information about Parrot diets was very interesting because we now know what to give him and what not to give him.
Finally, the book on biting was excellent, it makes very interesting reading and in fact we used the methods in this book to stop Morgan from biting us when we first got him.
I am more than pleased to have spent my money on this training course and associated parts because it has been very helpful to my family in starting to train Morgan.
Leslie J Sharples Northampton, United Kingdom
I have really benefitted from your training course. Sherlock, my Parrot, is extremely intelligent. He not only can immitate voices, sounds, words, sentences, etc, he understands concepts. He knows when it’s time to go to work or church, he knows when it’s clean-up time, and he can have full conversations with himself that make sense.
However, I was not successful in getting him to respond to my questions, requests, etc. when I wanted him to. He gives our English Springer Spaniel different commands such as: Zoe, come, sit, shake, down and so on. He praises her as well. Of course, he only does this when he feels like it.
After receiveing your course of study, I realized how wrongly I was trying to train Sherlock. Today, he finally responded correctly when I made my request to count, and he received a treat and praise as a reward. We are on our way to successful training.
Another problem I have, is that Sherlock makes a beeping sound every time I sit down to eat. He expects to get some of my supper. Your course has helped me to start correcting that problem. He is starting to realize that he only gets some pasta (which he loves) or other treat, when he is quiet or responds to my requests.
Thanks to your course, I now have the proper techniques to train Sherlock to do what I want him to, when I want him to.
Thanks for your dedication to training birds, and for your concern with each one of your students. I imagine that your other students are as appreciative as I am. Thanks, again!
Ethel Sherman Lykens, Pennsylvania
I have had my Parrot, Dooney for 1 month today. After bringing her(I think it’s a her) home for the bird store she was the sweetest little bird going but after one day on top of her cage by herself, she turned into the devil bird.
I came home from work after having left her out of her cage (cause she likes being out) and when I approached her she turned into a lunging, biting devil bird. She tried to bite me and everyone in the family. She did manage to bite me. I absolutely panicked and called my son to see if something had happened when I wasn’t home that could have caused this. He said no.
I thought I had screwed up but I found your training course and immediately ordered.
Now after learning that she was controlling me and everyone around her, I am back in control by using your tips. She did try to bite me this morning and I let her know she wasn’t the boss.
It’s funny because you can look at her facial expressions and see that she is trying to figure out what she can get away with and when she’ll be in trouble. After reading your training and learning how to put myself in control, she doesn’t generally try to bite me but she’ll try to push my hand away with her beak.
That tells me that she is communicating with me but doesn’t feel the urge to bite me.
Marcy Mason Henderson,Nevada
BOOK FOUR
: How To Choose Your
First Parrot Wisely…Tips And Warnings
The
#1 most important “buyers rule” that you need to keep
in mind when you buy your Parrot. (See Page 9)
…
The #1 catastrophic “buyer” mistake that first time Parrot owners make when they buy a Parrot… and how you can easily avoid making this mistake. (See Page 9)…
The 5 different types of sellers where you can buy a Parrot… and how to choose which place is the best for YOU. (See Pages 10 and 11)…
Effective research tips… How to research before deciding on getting a Parrot (See Page 15)…
The
4 crucial “store” questions that you must ask any store
from which you buy your Parrot (See Pages 16 and 17)
…
I think your training course is wonderful.
I have had my new companion “Angel Pie” for about three months now and she is already etched on my heart. My cat Brittany (Himalayan Persian – 14 years old) loves her too!
I applied your techniques to stop my bird from biting the first day I got your info and she was almost completely cured of that habit within a week – and within two weeks – no more biting. Now she only gives little “love” bites.
Thank you for delivering the goods that work!
Kimberly Olson Fort Worth, Texas, USA
Your training course is WONDERFUL! I learned so much from all of it. The food section has changed the way my parrot eats and with little resistance. The sleep section (on hours of light) was something I did not know,within a few days my Jac-ee was a different bird! The age definitions totally explained why Jac-ee acts like a sometimes bratty teenager. I cannot say enough about all that I learned from your course, and Jac-ee too! We are “high four-ing” now! Thank You Thank You Thank You.
I will read your course over and over again, it is a great reference guide.
Linda Kleist Arvada, Colorado
We was quite excited to find your website and once we began receiving the instructional emails we had to know more so we ordered your ebook. My husband and I absolutely loved it! We are first time bird owners and have purchased a parrot (Mr. Grey) as a handfed baby and another parrot (P.J.) as an adolescent (which has some undesirable personality traits). We we doing several things absolutely wrong and your book made absolute sense! We we trying to train our birds the way we do our dogs!
WRONG! We now have faith that with your guidance we can rear Mr. Grey properly and correct P.J.’s behavior and be able to provide them a permanent loving home.
Gala Payne Portage, Indiana
I received my training course and I have worked with my birds for a couple of weeks, and I can see a big difference in them.
I want to thank you for the training course it has made my life a lot easier and my fingers are not sore all the time from my birds always biting – the biting has been reduced approx. eighty percent and I am so proud of my birds.
William B. Coulter, Crestwood, Kentucky, USA
Your product has made me more knowledgeable about my bird.
I have started working with my pet and I am already starting to see improvements. Your product is excellent.
Sasheen Maharaj South Africa
I thought it was extremely informative. It helped me and my 2 new birds bond. It showed me not to be scared of them and how to handle them properly. They did bite me at first but, I read in the e-book what to look for and it really works. They are easier to handle and play with now. I am very glad I bought the e-book.
I am very skeptical of on-line products. The transaction was very secure, I am very pleased with the e-book. By the way, this was the first e-book I have ever bought. It was very easy to download. I am a satisfied customer.
Thanks for your helpful information.
Sincerely, Donna Lonsiak
I found your parrot training courses easy to understand and follow. With a little patience and good humor, you can follow Nathalie’s information and train your bird to be a wonderful, life-long companion. My bird Sapphire is screaming less and I’m enjoying her more. What more could you ask?
Bill Tanner Los Angelas, California
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The real
question is: How much are you willing to spend to have
a happier, healthier, playful, well
behaved, and more affectionate Parrot
sharing the intimacy of your home with you, your family, and
friends?
Perhaps
not much until you have a serious problem…
I guarantee you,
as soon as something starts going wrong, or your
Parrot starts misbehaving, or gets ill, then it really
does become a serious issue, perhaps even VERY costly in both
time and money for you to resolve the problem or inconvenience.
As you might have already experienced, the emotional attachment between a Parrot owner and his or her Parrot, can be VERY INTENSE, and you’ll do just about ANYTHING to solve the problem, as quickly and happily as possible.
My sincere desire
is to help you and your Parrot find
more joy through very helpful knowledge that ALL Parrot
owners should have when they take on the BIG responsibility
of caring for a delicate living creature…
You don’t want
to be the unwitting cause of unnecessary suffering…
To make sure this
ebook set is picked up by as many Parrot
owners or future Parrot owners as possible, I have made a radical
decision…
56 DAY MONEY BACK GUARANTEE – See more details below.
SPECIAL FREE BONUS #1
How To Keep Your Parrot
Radiantly Healthy And Avoid Disease
Know the 9 major diseases that can affect your Parrot
… and the crucial symptoms you need to watch
out for in order to detect these illnesses before
they can become serious. (See
Pages 3, 4, 5 and 6)…
Young Parrot disease…
Polyomavirus affects young Parrots… and what you can do to prevent your
Parrot from getting affected by this disease
(See Page 4)…
The 10 most common injuries that can affect your Parrot… and what you can do to protect your
Parrot from them. (See
Pages 7, 8 and 9)…
Those first crucial 2 weeks… Why the first 2
weeks after you bring your Parrot
home are absolutely crucial for the development of
a healthy relationship between you and your
Parrot, and what you should do during the
first 2 weeks in order to build rapport with your bird (See Page 10)
…
5 Critical Longevity Tips… The 5 crucial things that you must learn
about your Parrot in order
to ensure that it has a long and healthy life.
(See Page 10)…
One expert Parrot owner health
tip: One essential health food item that you
should include in your Parrot’s diet that will not only give it a shiny, gorgeous
plumage but also make it far more intelligent!
(See Page 11)…
Alternative medicine for Parrots? Did you know
that the Japanese technique of Reiki and the Chinese technique
of Acupuncture can benefit not only humans but also
Parrots? Not to mention homeopathic remedies, even
aromatherapy! Find out how you can use alternative
medicine to cure your Parrot’s illnesses or mood swings!
(Pages 11 – 12)
As this site develops it will become a monthly payment
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as an early contributor that adds value to this important
Parrot resource site.
In
need of emergency advice for your Parrot?
Come ask in the members only forum, and you will
almost certainly get a prompt and very helpful response
from another Parrot owner
who has already been there in your shoes before you.
Fast answers to important questions…Get
immediate access to many questions that have already been
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guys get in your heart, you can’t help but become fanatical
towards them!), and develop lasting friendships, through
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Discover
and share the coolest and funniest new
Parrot tricks and outrageous real-life stories
…
Make this very small monetary investment now, both for your
Parrot’s sake and for you too!… you won’t regret it!
You’ll start seeing positive results immediately once you apply
the professional yet simple Parrot
training techniques shared in these ebooks.
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Parrot happier right now, with all the comprehensive
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You’ll Get:
BOOK ONE: How to Get Your Parrot To Talk and Do
Astonishing Tricks
BOOK TWO: How To Get
My Parrot To Love Me -(Fix your Parrot’s
behavioral problems – Biting, Screaming, etc… with expert
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BOOK THREE : A Happy Parrot Diet…
Important Tips And Warnings
BOOK FOUR : How To
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And Warnings
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I’m a stranger to downloading E-books and was a little worried if I was doing the right thing… but I finally made up my mind… What did I have to lose?
Even the price you were asking was not going to break the Bank… it has to be worth it I thought …
Boy! was I sensible… It was more than worth it!…
Downloading your book or should I say books was so simple that I didn’t believe that they had downloaded… Sure enough there they were… so quick… so simple… so worthwhile.
I found your information extremely valuable. Plus…this is a BIG plus…your enthusiasm in your writing is overwhelming… This straight forward… no nonsense composite guide has to be one of the best reads I’ve encountered on the well being and upkeep, plus easy training techniques on Parrots… and I’ve read loads believe me.
If you own a Parrot and are reading this and are in any doubt… like I was …then think it over and ask yourself will this book make a difference… a real difference? Can the training work for me and my Parrot… will we really find it that easy?…
Yes…Yes… and Yes is the answer…
Victor Door United Kingdom
I have found that the best part of your course is in the educating yourself on behalf of your bird and learning why they do what they do. You also stress the part of spending quality time and the placing of your bird in the house where they can see and hear you.
We have an eight month old parrot and already it is spoiled and thinks it is and has always been a part of the family. I can’t remember having so much fun. Gracie jumps down off her perch and wonders through the house looking for me if I stay old, her vocabulary is amazing. She rattles on for 45 minutes at a time. She is constantly learning new words and phrases.
I believe it is because where I read that you should spend quality time with them and become their friend. She has bonded with both my wife and me and either one of can and does feed and baths her. She likes to sit on my shoulder and watch t.v. while i feed her sun flower seeds.She has from spending time, learned to trust me and I am sure that I now have been adopted as part of her flock.
Keep up the good work and if you come up with new stuff let me know.
Pastor Brian Adams Jackson, Ohio
I am writing back about your training course. My husband and i have been reading and searching for the right bird for us we have actually decided to go with a parrot at petsmart in burnsville minnesota.
However we have spent alot of time looking, holding, and playing with all different birds. I have read some of your training course and it has helped minumize alot if pet stores that dont take care of there birds properly.
i am very glad we purchased your training couse and i believe it will help us in the long run with our dusky.
Andrea Tesseman Farmington, Minnesota
With regard your training course my comments are as follows:
I wish I had got your course before getting my parrot. I found I was really struggling with my parrot as he would only allow me to touch him.
Since sharing your course with the whole family, we have progressed to the level where my wife can now pick him up and take him around the house, in fact he now even follows her even when I’m in the room. He is far more tolerant of the children (5 & 7 Yrs)and has now really become the family bird, not just mine.
The e-books on diet and health were very informative and helpful. You also provide insight on maintaing your parrot, after reading this I was horrified at how my birds wing had been clipped. On the whole your course was worth every cent, and my family and my self refer back to it continually. Potty training was also helpful and we are halfway there with having our bird potty trained.
Frank Rawson Laezonia, South Africa
I invested in your training course after purchasing a young female parrot. She was hand fed as a baby, but then the pet store made the mistake of putting her back in a cage with her siblings. She had become hostile and fearful of humans, and the pet store employees had nicknamed her “Jaws” because of her defensive biting when they caught her with their hands.
I’m a counselor, so I love a challenge, and I felt a bond when the little creature cuddled under my flannel shirt. I tood her home and named her M
The course was helpful, especially the chapter on problem behaviors and how to get your parrot to love you. In no time, she was stepping up onto a wooden perch, and she has not seriously bitten me now in about 3 weeks. To the contrary, she skitters to the end of the wood perch I use to Step Up, and cuddles in the hollow of my hand inisisting I rub her head and neck. It’s pretty amazing. It was also helpful to know which fruits and veggies I can safely feed my bird.
I find a parrot the perfect bird for a middle aged professional who works long hours at the office. Her life expectancy does not exceed mine, which is one less worry.
Her playpen is small enough to sit on the end table next to my recliner while I read or watch TV, allowing us daily time together. They naturally like to hide in pockets and shirts, which makes them adorable and convenient
Steve Warner Montrose, Colorado
Your training course was of immense help to me. Even with limited time due to two new babies in the house – one of the bird variety and one of the human variety, I have seen a dramatic change in the way that my parrot interacts with me and my husband.
I was concerned when we first bought him as he was showing an extreme level of nervousness and aloofness as birds tend to do, however I beleive it is your program that has trained us to interact with our new baby.
Thank you so much for your insight and practical tips. I will not hesitate to recommend your training program to any bird owner.
Diane Ponsen Newcastle, Australia
I haven’t actually completed reading the entire course material, however, what I will say is that what I have read, I have learned from. My children and I are the proud owners of three lovely colourful birds (Ohla, Beeker & Baby Blue). Ohla had a tendency to bite my two year old daughter who enjoys walking around with all three on her shoulders or in her hair (the biting has stopped). Once and a while she tries, but we follow what you recommend and it doesn’t occur for long periods of time after that.
My thirteen year old takes showers with all three of them and it completely calms them down. We never knew you could! They really enjoy their showertime. Baby Blue is now sticking her entire head into the water reservoir, which she never did before beginning her shower regime.
My son who is eleven takes part in their development as well, so the whole family is really enjoying these little creatures. They don’t just remain in their cage.
Your material is easy to read for everyone and simple to follow. We’re happy we found you on the internet. My two year old daughter also likes to have them on the edge of the tub when she takes her bath and they are happy to stay there!
Thanks for the tips, they sure have helped.
Cheryl Ann Chambly, Quebec
I was really depressed because I got sick and had to retire early.I bought a parrot which I named “chi-chi”.He was scared to death of me at first until I purchased your course.Now he is tamed and knows I am his other “Daddy”.He is a very happy bird.Sings “All’ day long!He has added to my life richly.Due to your course I was able to bring Much “Joy”to his life as he brings to our home Thank You!!!
Jesus Espinosa Mesa, Arizona
I am thrilled with your parrot training course. Your knowledge and understanding of these beautiful creatures is extraordinary.
I am a studio musician and producer, well known for playing the guitar on such shows as Seinfeld and Married With Children as well as being a member of the grammy award winning musical act Manhattan Transfer, Jean Luc Ponty and rocker Bryan Adams.
I have a parrot named Renge. He loves to accompany me in he car, in the recording studio and even for a ride on my scooter. Although I have to use a leash on the scooter, your course has helped me build a relationship with him, so he can be free around the house as well as the recording studio.
After 6 days with your course, Renge who was already murmuring some words, is clearly saying Peekaboo, Baby Bird, Cmon, and Goodnite. he doesn’t yet do it on command ,but we are working on it. I am also working on the response to my questions exercise that you mention in your great book.
Your chapter on nutrition and feeding has opened a world of new foods for him to enjoy. I had been feeding him only “pretty bird” conure food and a piece of apple each day. Now he enjoys fruits and veggies, pasta, and I’ve even taken him to a couple of restaurants where he shares for example ..rice at the Mexican restaurant. there is much fun work to do thanks to your Parrot Secrets and I intend to get good at this, as he gets better and better.
This past week there was a bird feeder making class at the HUTCHINGS MUSEUM in Lehi Utah. I was invited to bring Renge, and the 20 or so children loved him. The museum upon hearing that it was Renge’s birthday on May 1st (he will be 1 year) has offered the museum for his birthday party. Now if that isn’t a testament to him and your training methods, i don’t know what is. Thank you
Jamie Glaser
Provo, Utah
Where do I start about your training course, first I have been involved with avians of all sorts but particularly parrots since I was 8 years old… dating myself that would be 37 years. I have always been to many bird seminars & I have tried to read everything I can get my hands on about information that I had not previously learned about or read elsewhere.
I had for the most part been a parrot person. Your course has been especially helpful in getting my parrot, Gabby started on her speech, in less than 2 weeks she now says ” Hi Gabby, Hello, Love you too & Gabby like?” I couldn’t believe how quickly she started & how soon she perfected the words, she speaks very clearly.
We are currently working on some trick ideas, as my daughter wants to be on “Pet Stars” and is determined to take Gabby to Hollywood.
I have shared some of your information on the biting & screaming issues with a dear friend of mine (although I advised her to purchase them for herself, which I believe she did), whom rescued a Double yellow head, who had all his negitive behaviors reinforced by his previous owners. She is reporting no blood draw for over a week, and the screaming stops with just a little “flock whistle” when she leaves the room.
So I must thank you so much for myself, as well as my girlfriend she was really getting close to the end which would’ve meant I would have inherrited her bird & I am really quite content at the moment with my pet numbers, so thank you again for saving me from adopting one more parrot in need of reform, by helping my girlfriend through your training courses, to gain confidence, be able to read his body language & get the upper hand back.
Thank you so much for your courses they are wonderful, and anyone thinking of getting a parrot should purchase them as well as anyone currently sharing their life with a parrot or parrots.
Maureen Snyder Oyen Novato, California
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Zero Time Dilemma- in which Akane must save the world and has no time for whiny boyfriends
OKAY. Just finished another intense round of Zero Time Dilemma. We’ve only got one ending left to unlock (the true ending, I imagine). Will definitely be able to finish this game next time.
I’ll start with the new Akane stuff that happened because we basically all know she’s the one I really care about.
Carlos bounced around a few timelines and then told Akane and Junpei to go to the timeline where the virus is unleashed on the world and six billion people die thus leading to the events of the second game.
They did, and Zero (who is Diana and Sigma’s non-Phi kid, which i figured might be the case) was all like “mwahahaha I unleashed the virus to stop a religious extremist from ending all of humanity, figured if i killed six billion people i’d have like. a 75% chance of killing the terrorist.
Both Akane and Junpei did not think this was a great plan and Akane was all like “NO ONE SHOULD PLAY GOD AND DECIDE WHO LIVES AND WHO DIES” and both me an gf were like “Akane....that’s just a tad hypocritical considering your death game dontcha think” Zero then echoed us by being all “lol that’s rich coming from u”.
Akane’s all like “WHATEVER I’M GONNA GET OUT OF HERE AND SAVE EVERYONE ASSHOLE” and Junpei was like ‘YEAH WE ARE. NOTICE MY EMPHASIS ON WE, AKANE” and she just ignored him. luv her.
Zero was also like “AKANE KURASHIKI YOUR PARENTS DIDN’T REALLY DIE IN A ACCIDENT YOUR DAD WAS WRONGLY CONVICTED OF A CRIME AND YOUR MOM KILLED HERSELF” and I don’t know how this is relevant to anything because Akane’s parents were never really mentioned before but OKAY.
anyway Carlos appears and said he’s just been sitting around waiting for Akane and Junpei to come for like ten months in this timeline. Junpei points out “you could have just stopped the murder game from happening” and Carlos is like “yeah but then I wouldn’t have gotten to meet u guys. I value our friendship. :)” I AM NOT JOKING THIS IS HIS REASONING.
Junpei is like “CARLOS SIX BILLION PEOPLE ARE GOING TO DIE NOW” AND Carlos is like “oh whooooops i didn’t know about that”
Akane’s just like “welp, gotta start over. Gonna machiavellian mastermind this shit and start a cult and do another murder game so I can send Phi and Sigma back in time to save humanity and basically the events of the second game in this series will happen blablabla you know the drill. OFF TO SAVE THE WORLD.”
Junpei’s like “wait Akane i’ll come with you and help! I’ll even join your cult crash keys or whatever the hell stupid name you gave it! I WILL BE SUCH A GOOD SIDEKICK”
At which point Akane’s like “no you’re not coming Junpei just forget about this and stay safe”
and I was like “is she just gonna punch him in the face so hard he forgets and leave him there amazing” AND that is basically because she stuck him with the memory erasing drug and he was all like “I’LL NEVER FORGET U AKANE” before passing out i actually felt pretty bad for him.
And honestly I don’t really know why Akane didn’t want Junpei to be her sidekick.I think the idea is supposed to be she doesn’t want him to bear the ~burden~ with her and figures he is too delicate to be part of her ruthless cult that orchestates murder games for the greater good. And yeah, it’s true that would be pretty hard on him, but GUESS WHAT ELSE IS HARD. LIVING IN A POST APOCALYPTIC HELLSCAPE WHICH IS WHAT HE’S GOING TO BE DOING REGARDLESS. LIKE SIX BILLION PEOPLE ARE GONNA DIE AND SOCIETY IS GOING TO BE REDUCED TO ASHES, EITHER WAY JUNPEI’S LIFE IS GONNA SUCK, AKANE SO WHY NOT JUST LET HIM BE YOUR SIDEKICK LIKE HE WANTS.
So me and gf tried to figure out logical reasons for why she left Junpei behind and they all work pretty well:
1) she doesn’t want to have to argue with him about every ruthless decision she makes it would get so boring.
2) he seems to think the name she chose for her cult is stupid (and he’s right, I’m sorry Akane but it is i still love you though) and if U DON’T LIKE THE NAME YOU DON’T GET TO BE PART OF THE CULT JUNPEI, THOSE ARE THE RULES.
3) She really doesn’t like the ugly ring he gave her and doesn’t want to keep wearing it but she doesn’t know how to tell him (i know she’s wearing it as an old lady in the second game, but that’s only because she knew Junpei was coming so she resigned herself to wearing it again for a while so as not to hurt his feelings)
4) A RELATIONSHIP WOULD DISTRACT HER FROM THE MISSION. (actually this one may be one of her canon reasons, i can see her thinking that). ESPECIALLY A RELATIONSHIP WITH JUNPEI. HE IS VERY HIGH MAINTENANCE AND SHE DOESN’T HAVE TIME FOR THAT.
5) she loves Junpei but she’s sick of his goth-emo shit honestly, so it is best they part here.
6) her ruthless decisions for the greater good often involve her getting herself killed on purpose so she can jump around timelines and get info, and he’d definitely argue with her a lot whenever she decided to do that, she does not have time for his protective bullshit (this one might also be canon since she DOES deliberately get herself killed in a couple timelines the second game For the Mission. No way Junpei would have liked that. Akane anticipated this because she is Just That Good)l
7) Junpei knocked her out to protect her in that other timeline and she’s still mad about that so this is her Revenge. HOW DOES IT FEEL WHEN SOMEONE DOES IT TO YOU JUNPEI FEELS PRETTY BULLSHIT HUH.
All of these reasons could be true at once honestly, Akane is a complicated woman.
And i love her. As you guys know.. she is such a ruthlessly smart, morally gray, determined little asshole who, despite being very fond of her loser boyfriend, has no qualms about tossing him aside for the Greater Good and fuck his feelings on the matter. IT IS VERY RARE TO SEE A GIRL BE THIS TYPE OF CHARACTER. The “I’m gonna make you to forget about me to Protect You” character is also usually a guy too, but Akane pulls it off way better.
Also when you think of it, Akane has a TON of motivations and stuff going on besides Junpei, but Junpei’s motivations pretty much always boil down to “i love Akane and want to help her with whatever she’s currently doing but she never lets me help her :(”. (except for in the second game when he adds a “i love my son and want to help him”, which is in the same vein honestly, since having a kid as your sole motivation is a pretty common thing for a female character too).
So yeah, Akane’s very much in the role you usually see the guy in while Junpei’s in the role you’d see the girl in. (right down to Junpei’s love being pretty much unconditional no matter what weird shit Akane does to him because he knows she ~means well deep down~.) (i like on one hand i get it Junpei i love Akane too , but on the other hand your lack of self respect is KINDA WORRYING.) (like it’s pretty clear by now you get turned on by women who are ruthlessly terrifying, which, same, but there should be limits to that bud). (then again she also had to put up with your emo shit so i guess you’re even on the unconditional love front)
This game isn’t great about it’s female characters and gender roles in a lot of other ways, but I really do appreciate how Junpei and Akane’s dynamic is unusual in that way, at least.
And that’s my i love Akane update. I’ll update on everything else in a separate post.
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here’s a question: why was it so important to make jack and ashi have a romantic relationship? someone explain that because i’m just not getting it and i’m seeing how we could have had things play out similarly and still have zero romance involved. (obviously no wedding, but u kno. it could have kept a lot otherwise.)
it doesn’t make it automatically better or more impactful just because you made them fall in love. does ashi matter more as jack’s love interest? are jack’s journey, sacrifices, losses some how more meaningful if he has a lover? was it really necessary??
that just comes off as completely.... lazy. it’s lazy writing.
i loved how season 5 started off and it was going so well up until we suddenly had to hyper condense ashi’s redemption, saving jack, super hyper condense the new budding romance, and then the following events until the end.
i get that probably they had a limited amount of episodes to work with, but i think we could have done better here.
imagine that ashi isn’t fully cleansed just because she decides to believe jack, scrub the tar off her body, and some how make herself a forest fairy get up. (it’s very cute, but that shit was impractical and wouldn’t have stayed fresh that long. you can’t even call celtic magic on that.)
imagine that she still has some of that evil influence in her because aku’s essence is literally in her dna. imagine she wants to be good and to do the right thing, but she still gets intrusive thoughts about destroying the weak or turning on jack and it scares her. imagine she’s afraid she’ll truly become evil. imagine that she trusts jack, but she doesn’t trust herself. that becomes her arc, learning that she can overcome her fears and trust herself and know that she isn’t a monster or a weapon just because of what her mother intended for her. that she is so much more than that, she is her own person and she can live her own life how she wants to. and that gentleness, kindness, isn’t weakness.
imagine that jack wants to show her the truth, how the world was and how the world could be, but he’s still afraid to open up and be vulnerable. imagine jack doesn’t trust ashi as much as he wants to and he doesn’t trust himself. imagine jack gradually overcoming this as she shows him that he’s not totally lost. that there is still righteousness in him and the will to save people. that he has saved so many people and that he can still save others, his actions aren’t a death sentence. his attempts to save people and do right aren’t futile. the actions of evil people aren’t his fault. imagine that ashi helps him find his will to go on and reignites his hope. the sword isn’t his hope. it was only ever a tool to fight evil, using the righteousness of the human spirit.
imagine that instead of falling in love with each other, they help each other overcome their fears. they help each other live with their pain and trauma and move forward. they help each other start to heal.
imagine the scene where aku realizes ashi is his daughter and how that could have gone. imagine that he brings back her fears that she’s incapable of being good or gentle. imagine that he takes advantage of her uncertainty and when he takes her, jack doesn’t just tell her to fight it. he reminds her that she is more than this. that she isn’t condemned to this fate just because others say so. imagine him encouraging her to take her life back.
imagine that jack still can’t fight her, but it’s not because he’s in love with her. it’s because she has become so important to him because they held each other up. she was the first person he opened up to and trusted in fifty years. imagine that it’s because she gives him hope to believe in himself, and if he can’t help her then how can he save anyone? imagine that he can’t fight her because he’s afraid he will fall back into being a destroyer.
imagine that jack still struggles to believe in himself, but he believes in ashi. he tells her he believes in her, that he saw her goodness far outshine the darkness. when she’s about to kill him, she stops herself because she is fighting to take back control of her own body and she’s gaining ground. if jack can believe in her, the jack who was so sad and broken and had given up, if he can say that she has the strength in her to free herself, he must be right. if jack says that she saved him, then she must be good. because she trusts him and believes him.
imagine ashi takes control back and when aku commands her to obey because he’s her father, she tells him no. he is no father to her and she is no one’s pawn. imagine when she grabs the sword’s blade it still burns her because she still has aku’s evil on her, even if she is controlling it, but she still holds on and gets it to jack.
imagine that they don’t just ditch the party then and there and instead work together to fight and defeat aku, alongside all the friends and allies who came to their aid. when it’s over, they stay and pick up their fallen. they stay and rebuild that world together. the world jack always meant to save and the world ashi wants to know. jack atones for his lost time and ashi lives. really lives so she can come into her own and see that the world is again as beautiful as jack said it used to be. they build an era of peace.
while also still being each other’s support. because you don’t easily come back from that kind of trauma. of course they would both have ptsd. ashi has to still learn how to exist in a world that doesn’t demand her to kill and be cold. jack has to learn to live in a world where he doesn’t have to fight to survive and that pure evil isn’t lurking in the shadows anymore. they helped each other so much before, but that was only the start. it was only a foundation. now they have to rebuild and heal, as best as they can. now they have a future full of hope and promise.
or, if you still want that sad filled end, you can still have jack return to the past. but this time, when aku is trapped in the sword, jack has to pause.
if aku dies here, ashi will never have been born. but if he stays sealed in the sword... what then? will ashi cease to be? if she still exists, does that mean the future still falls to darkness?
jack can’t bear to lose her. to him, killing aku now means killing her. he will once again have destroyed something he cares for. suddenly he’s losing his resolve again. ashi has to tell him to end it, knowing full well that she will cease to be. they both know this. it’s different from when she was taken over. now she’s not desperate and afraid. when she tells him to finish it, she’s resolute. it has to be done.
because she is deciding her own fate and she knows that the world is so much bigger and more important. she was made for one purpose and she was able to turn the tables on it. the evil she thought she had to destroy was never actually jack... it was aku. and if this is the price for that, she’s okay with it. she tells jack that he isn’t killing her. he already saved her. now he has to save the future.
imagine how much it pains jack to have to relent. he was finally able to trust again and believe, and now he has to say good bye.
as soon as aku is dead, jack and ashi remain with what little time they have left together. ashi grows weak as she starts to disappear, but she’s not in pain. they hold onto each other and jack still doesn’t want her to go. she assures him that he will be okay. because he’s strong in the ways that matter and she believes in him. jack tells her he doesn’t want to forget her. she saved him from his hopelessness, he couldn’t have done this without her.
imagine that when she disappears, jack tries so hard to hold on to his memories of her. but in the end he isn’t able to because the timeline is being rewritten. there is no future with aku. there is no future where ashi is born from evil. but jack still harbors wounds in his mind and spirit that he can’t fully explain and has nightmares he can’t fully understand.
even so, it’s not all bad. because he also still has a feeling that he will be okay. he doesn’t know how he knows. it’s just a feeling. it’s hopeful and so bright and it gets him through his toughest times.
and eventually he has his own family. he gets married--because of course he does, he’s the emperor’s son he can’t just not continue the family line--and it’s okay because she’s a kind woman who reminds him that this is the future he wanted to protect.
when their first daughter is born, he names her ashi. he doesn’t know where the name came from or why it matters. it was simply the first name to pass his lips and it felt right.
#samurai jack spoilers#long post under read more#this went from critique to pseudo fanfic and got long lmao oops#real long even
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Overprotective Much? (FiddAuthor) (2)
So, originally this was just gonna be a little fluff piece about Ford protecting Fiddleford because I’m sure people weren’t very nice to him. I then remembered the first story I did with this first piece and I figured I guess I’ll make this a series???
Based on the original idea from @artsymeeshee
“Get out of here you hillbilly freak!” The sound of a broom clattering against something that was human caught the interest of a passing Stanford Pines. Peering around a corner, the man frowned at the scene before him. A man was crouched on the ground, white beard slowly turning brown as the man was forced against the muddy ground, the shopkeeper still yelling rather unsavory things at the man before him. Big brown eyes fearfully looked up, locking onto Stanford’s navy ones as if pleading for help. “I told you to leave!” The man raised the broom clutched in his hand once again, only the wood never contacted the man. “Drop that right now.” The shopkeeper gulped. A very tall and angry man stood beside him, six-fingered hand curled around his wrist so hard the broom fell with a clatter. “Go back inside, lest I lose my temper.” “U-Uh sure thing…” The man stammered, quickly retreating into his shop. Stanford scowled before turning to the man slowly getting to his feet. “Are you alright sir?” He asked gently, offering a hand that was taken. “Lil’ ol’ me is just fine.” The man chuckled, the southern accent throwing Stanford for a bit of a loop. Stanford frowned lightly at the forming bruises he saw, the other man gazing up with those eyes that now shone. “Thanks fer the help!” “It was no problem at all, Mr.?” “McGucket! Wow, ain’t no one call me mister in a long time!” The man crowed in delight, though this was lost on the shocked male standing beside him. “F-Fiddleford?!” The man spluttered, the southern male cocking his head to the side in slight amusement. “Yep, that’s my name!” He grinned, blinking in confusion when he was pulled into a hug moments later by the stranger. “Uh?” “I thought I would never see you again old friend.” The man sighed shakily, hugging Fiddleford as close to him as he could, which wasn’t hard when he weighed less than a feather to Stanford. “Uh, pardon my noggin, but who are ya?” Drawing back Stanford looked at the other man, his joyful expression quickly turning to one of sadness and confusion. “Fiddleford, it’s me, Stanford?” The southern male tilted his head in confusion, the man before him turning pale as cold realization washed over him. “You alright there?” Fiddleford asked gently, the man looking down at him with the most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen. “I…You…” The man seemed in a sort of shock, McGucket tilting his head slightly in confusion. He seemed to know who he was, that was for darn sure, and seemed sad about something related to the loss of his memories. The man lifted his hand and ran it through his hair, the six fingers twitching in…Fiddleford’s eyes went wide when something seemed to click. “Fiddleford?” “Stanferd,” The name was spoken in a hesitant whisper. “is that you?” The look on the mans, no Stanford’s, face caused Fiddleford’s heart to skip a beat. “Y-Yes! Yes, I’m right here Fiddleford.” Stanford grinned in relief, a relieved laugh escaping him. Fiddleford felt himself being embraced again, this time wrapping his frail arms around Stanford’s neck with his own laugh. “I never thought I would see you again my friend.” “Same here.” The southern male chuckled, eyes shining as they parted. “Well, I think so anyways! Kinda hard to tell with this ol’ thing.” He motioned to his head, Stanford frowning once again. “You never did destroy that gun of yours…did you?” The question hung in the air uncomfortably, Stanford sighing as Fiddleford shrugged. “Oh Hadron…” “What can I say? Ain’t my brightest moment…” Fiddleford laughed weakly, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. Stanford took in the males appearance, his bony frame and ratty clothes causing nothing but concern. The bruises forming on his pale arms and shoulder caused a brief snarl to come onto Stanford’s face, Fiddleford backpedaling slightly. “I cannot believe they were hurting you.” He spoke in a low tone, kneeling with a soft expression. Fiddleford couldn’t tear his gaze away from those loving blue eyes focused on him, the skittish male moving closer. Stanford gently leaned forward when the male was close enough, pressing his forehead against Fiddleford’s with a soft hum. Surprised, Fiddleford stay still but all too soon felt himself pressing closer to Stanford. A feeling of safety enveloped the southern male as the two embraced, the man smiling to himself as he felt firm arms wrap around him. “This is real nice.” McGucket sighed, a smile tugging at his lips as he listened to Stanford’s heartbeat. “Would you like this to continue?” The researcher asked curiously, the southerner looking up with a questioning look. “I would very much like to get reacquainted with you.” “Really?” Fiddleford blushed slightly, the taller male chuckling as he straightened up, hand held out. “Golly, I ain’t had an offer like that in a real long time…” “Then allow me.” Fiddleford smiled and took the offered hand, Stanford frowning lightly at his old friend’s appearance. “Would you like to come home with me? You appear to be injured…” “Aw, it’s nothin’.” Fiddleford chuckled nervously, but Stanford wasn’t having any of it. The southerner let out a brief yelp as Stanford easily scooped him up bridal style, the man instinctively hugging himself close. “Stanferd!” “What?” The tall male asked innocently, his gaze only on Fiddleford as he began to walk back towards the Mystery Shack. As he walked Fiddleford began to relax in his hold, the two chatting about what had gone on in their lives since their unfortunate separation. “Well well well! Seems that our little hillbilly got himself a friend!” The booming voice of Bud Gleeful rang out as Stanford passed the used car lot. Fiddleford instantly slunk in Stanford’s arms, the tall male curiously glancing over at the hefty man. “May I help you?” Stanford asked politely, though there was tone to it that made Fiddleford slowly look up. Bud was still grinning, Stanford frowning as the portly man meandered over. “Bud Gleeful’s the name. You must be Stanford, not a slouch like your con brother huh?” The man laughed uproariously, Stanford’s frown turning into a scowl as Bud zeroed in on the man in his arms. “Maybe I was wrong, seems to me yer getting’ real friendly with that hick there.” “Fiddleford McGucket is not a hick.” Stanford growled, stepping back with his right foot so his stance was one of being ready to fight. Bud was either ignorant or chose to ignore the shift in demeanor, a shark-like grin on his face as he circled the two men. “Why sure he is! No sane person would live in the dump like McGucket there, and no rational person would try and talk ta him.” Bud chuckled, blinking in alarm when Stanford let out a deep noise that was like a low growl, blue eyes flashing as they fixated on the cars salesman. “U-Uh…” “Say one more word, I dare you.” He hissed, his words dripping with anger as he advanced towards Bud. The portly man felt like a corner animal as he was backed against one of his cars, eyes darting around for any assistance, but there was none to be had. “Please, give me a reason to show you the error of your ways.” “I-I meant no harm friend, I was m-merely telling the truth.” Bud stammered, heart racing as the man snarled at him, his eyes now emotionless as they bored into his. “Is that so? Then perhaps it would be my duty to inform you that all you’ve said is false. I could make you disappear right here and now, it would be so easy and I would feel nothing but satisfaction.” The threat send chills down both Bud and Fiddleford’s spine, the southerner tugging at Ford’s coat to get his attention. “Stanferd…don’t. It ain’t worth it.” He spoke softly, Stanford glancing at his former partner before turning back to Bud with another snarl. “Count yourself lucky, but if you ever speak such things again I will not have Fiddleford to stop me next time.” Stanford stepped back, adjusting his grip on Fiddleford before he walked away from the shaking man, who heaved a sigh of relief once Stanford had gone from view. “I cannot believe the nerve of that…that excuse for a human being.” “It’s alright, Bud ain’t happy with anyone.” Fiddleford tried to reassure, the gaze fixated on him showing only love and concern, something he was grateful for. “I will not have him upsetting you if I can help it.” Stanford scoffed, pressing a sweet kiss to Fiddleford’s forehead. “I will not let anyone hurt you ever again.” “I know Stanferd…I know.” Fiddleford smiled gently, relaxing in Stanford’s arms once more as he walked. He had never felt safer in his entire life as he did now.
#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#ford#sixer#fiddleford mcgucket#fidds#I love these two nerds#someone help Ford#Ford wants to protect them all#poor Bud#I keep torturing him#but I mean he's not a nice guy
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DSOD Differences between ENG and JP
These are just my observations from watching the DSOD movie in English twice, then once in Japanese (Here’s where I watched the sub, so credit the fan subber! Also remember to support the official release of the JP with subs when it is fully available! -- https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B3pKUWJ9VACyR2RueEN0ZS15R0k/view ). Feel free to add stuff/your own thoughts. I don’t know Japanese, so I’m going off the fan-sub.
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT, DUH.
· Yugi's not like "I wish I could have told him what he meant to me" he's just like "we're in our own worlds now..."
· Omfg the short bully guy has a REALLY DEEP VOICE I love it
· and he's like to Aigami "Well, you are CUTE..."
· He's like "I'm gonna make you famous...the theme this time around...IS PAIN HAHA"
· I forgot that Kaiba calls Atem ‘Yugi’ in the JP
· "Leaving Yugi behind like a COWARD and vanishing without a trace made it difficult to track you down..." (In the Cathedral)
· ORE NO TAURN
· I forgot that the music from the jp is pretty cool--very orchestral--rather than GUITAR RIFFS
· Already makes more sense with the duels—they mention sacrificing monsters more often thank god
· The mirror absorbs neo 3 blue eyes whatshisfuck and sends it back at Kaiba. It doesn't deflect it and then send a new attack like the dub implies
· Kaiba doesn't mention any coiffed hair but says "I even replicated his provoking personality"
· Jounouchi, you're fired! Instead of NO CLOWNING AROUND
· More explanation about the Plana/Planners--ok so 7 items found, Pharoah goes back home, and it opens up that new dimension where they've gotta keep the order or something like that
· They want to get rid of the old world to make room for a new order? And they gotta eradicate evil?
· "We've been waiting for you" instead of "You've graced us with yer presence sIR"
· Still has the "Ok but it took Yugi 8 years..." "Yeah, but Yugi has the brain of a child" KAIBA SAVAGE
· Kaiba's jp voice is so much more intimidating just a reminder
· "Even though I didn't register my deck or duel disk anywhere, you still knew where I was. You're quite the control freak, aren't you?" - Diva
· "I hate dangerous murderers like you, you see...so I think I'll need to erase you from this dimension." -Diva, with gun at back
· They're actually talking about the connection between consciousnesses. Which relates to that 2 chapter prequel manga (Transcend Game).
· Diva's like "Kaiba, you know all about the human consciousness, don't you? Everything done in this world is done by the unconscious mind...all of which are linked together...even you, the dictator of this city, are powerless to control the consciousnessesses of all of Domino…let alone the world."
· I’m not going to bother spelling consciousness right anymore
· Because Kaiba had to use the consciousnessess of all the children combined playing his VR prototype to catapult himself up into the afterlife the first time in the manga
· So to keep everything in order you need those links to be balanced, too.
· It’s in the ENG too but if you watch the children that Diva summons are all connected with these golden darting lines and now that makes more sense THX
· He's borrowing the power of other people's consciousnesses (all those children) in order to have enough energy to wield his powers by using the cube
· So in the other dimension that he sends the gunman, the gunman is no longer connected to the consciousnesses of everyone else in the world anymore
· In the JP then too Diva explains that he is using the power of the Plana, but also the Plana's Mind, which makes the control of his consciousness (and by extension the links to everyone else) 7x stronger than everyone else's
· Instead of saying "NOT SO FAST/etc." when he's not disappearing into the other dimension, Kaiba goes "DON'T WORRY, MOKUBA” BIG BRO IS HERE FOR U AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT
· So the reason why the power didn't send Kaiba to the other dimension is because his ego is SO INFLATED and thus his consciousness and intellect are so great that he's on par with Diva's Plana Mind
· With his duel disk connected to his brain--which if you remember is connected to that Cloud Network--he's got enough connections with other consciousnesses in the cloud to combat Diva's powers??? I think
· "Kisama no TURN..." sounds so cool like damn
· JP also explains why he can summon shittons of blue eyes
· JP explains the spell cards better
· I think they left out the monster noises/screams in the ENG? Someone should confirm that for me
· "I was the one who had to bury Yugi, no, Atem inside of me. His ghost continues to wander in my unfulfilled consciousness. Yugi!" – Kaiba
· The eng music slightly is based off the jp music but with 10x more guitar riffs and zero chill
· As for why the fuck he could summon Obelisk—in the JPDiva says there's residual energy left in that place due to it being where the Pharaoh left the world, and that Kaiba must have picked up on it. And Diva says that Obelisk is only a servant to the pharaoh. I think Diva missed that whole Battle City thing tho and doesn't realize that other people were wielding the god cards too
· Still got "IT'S NOT A MONSTER. IT'S A GOD."
· No "I NEED TISSUEEEEES" thx
· Still got "Pharaoh can't come back if we get rid of his vessel" gotta kill Yugi
· The big duel tournie takes place at Kaibaland
· To put the puzzle back together quickly he needed his machine to be in space to utilize zero gravity—still extra
· "Enough of the boring Flattery. // My Apologies, Mr. Kaiba" No "I'm programed to remind you of your genius" darn
· Yugi says he's keeping the Dark Magician in his deck and is like "I wonder what Aigami's gonna use in his deck" instead of "You got me out of a lot of jams!" Suggesting Yugi actually knows how to fucking build a deck wow shocker
· Shadi was supposed to collect all 7 items so he could send Pharaoh back to deadland and Yugi was a necessary vessel that had to have been chosen to help the Pharaoh get there out of the puzzle and shit
· Yugi shares a consciousness wavelength with the Plana people because welp he let the pharaoh live in his bod
· Instead of Joey just losing his memories in the dimension it's more him struggling to find out what's real and what's fake because he also can’t trust his own memories. And the idea is that he's not connected to the consciousness of the rest of the world so he's only seeing what he has ever seen. But if he does forget things then he does lose everything because he's relying solely on his own consciousness
· Shadi's eng voice is VERY similar to his jp voice nice
· Diva asks about rulers and how they aren't afraid because they have everything and never have anything taken from them. And so Shadi is like "Yeah but then they take everyone from others"--makes sense given that Diva tries to control everything so that he loses nothing. No talk about how easily manipulated children are like in the ENG. Just talk about power/loss/fear and loss/loss and fear
· Shadi says an evil thing lives in the ring and has already chosen a master, and that you have to surpass a trial to be able to wear it. Obviously that doesn't end well for him.
· 3 items are for justice, 3 have evil presences inside them, millennium puzzle has both
· Shadi says that there will be a young boy that will become the vessel for the pharaoh, and then says that he's the same as them (the Plana children--meaning he's probably just got strong connection powers or whatever/spiritual powers)
· "Oh, did he finally croak? You guys are an eyesore" -Yami!Bakura
· "I'm going to paint this world in darkness" – Yami!Bakura
· Diva doesn't know that Bakura doesn't have evil dickmix in his blood anymore
· "But...I killed someone very special to you, didn't I?" -Bakura. No "I also lost someone very important to me that day..." though obvs his dad is dead AF
· Joey was able to come out of the dimension because his bonds with his buds surpass dimensions--which is fucking intense given that going to a different dimension is supposed to prevent that in the first place friendship is sTRONG
· No "My cardio stinks", just "Bakura-kun..."
· Kaiba's under the impression that the afterlife is still connected to the puzzle--sorry Kaiba
· He really wants to resurrect pharaoh to face him again welp
· Also Mokuba isn't like "HEY YUGI, LOOKIN GOOD!" He's like "Hey Yugi! We've already got the game shop covered for you!" So that's nice. No worries about G-PA getting snatched in the meantime
· Diva says even with Kaiba's tech it's impossible for them to go into another dimension (inside of the cube to get the puzzle piece)--obvs Kaiba's not gonna be havin that later...
· Your body is a flesh prison for your soul and when you die it's free but until then you're stuck in flesh prison and even when you win murderous wars and fight needlessly you are still in yer flesh prison.
· So through Kaiba's duel disk he wants to allow people to go beyond the flesh prison to eliminate language/barriers/need for fighting/etc.
· So it's a lot more than just "PLAY MY CHILDREN'S CARD GAME"
· he legit says flesh prison
· Shadi's always been able to go through dimensions as a priest of the Pharaoh?
· Shit. "Yugi, I'll remind you, that you're just a vessel! -Kaiba
· "It looks like you won't summon the pharaoh...until I duel you into submission!" Ok kaiba
· No lemons being sour jokes
· No "You really hate dragons...don't you?"
· Kaiba does have a very dramatic line about Deep Eyes coming to live from the blue abyss
· "No you gotta let him go" but "This is the reality...he's no longer in there..." Yugi's like "I've accepted it and you gotta accept it" but nah
· But yeah the idea was to open a new dimension and drag the world into it with the 8th millennium item (cube).
· But, if you bring it into a dark world like Diva was going to, it would only bring the chosen ones into the new dimension, eliminating everyone else
· Still says "Kaiba, why? // Because of him. Yugi (the pharaoh)"
· Still has "Call him." But also has "Call him to you."
· Yugi just says "Draw...I'm sorry...everyone..." because there's no heart of the cards bullshit in the jp. So Yugi is convinced that he's failed instead of hoping in cards
· No epic music when Atem comes back so it's definitely more unsettling. Kind of underwhelming but makes it weightless. Which I can appreciate because it's basically like "Diva literally has so little power that there doesn't even need to be epic music because Yami just wipes the fucking floor with him"
· Instead of saying "DID HE ASK ABOUT ME?" Joey says "I saw him too!" And Yugi goes "I knew it!" So Atem did pay him a visit to get him to come out of the weird dimension. That’s cool
· "So he did really come here then, Yugi." - Kaiba
· "I had all but given up, Kaiba. But you still believed."
· "I don't know about that. Farewell, Yugi. You were indeed a proud duelist." - Kaiba
· So instead of being like "I got my thing with the pharaoh, bitch. And you got yours." it's more like hey we saved the world together, and I recognize you as a good, strong dude. We can be 'friends' now…in Kaiba's own way
· "Kaiba, I really have to thank you." -Yugi
· Mokuba’s like "Are you sure you want to do this?"And Kaiba says, "Once this is completed. It will create a new type of duel as we know it."Then Mokuba does say that this new prototype using the dimension emulator (different than the VR used earlier) is too dangerous.
· Kaiba isn't like "I leave everything to you...Mokuba..." He's like "Watch over everything while I'm away." Implying he plans on coming back.
· Thus this version of the movie is definitely less "KAIBA HAS NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!! BATTLE PHARAOH ANYWAY" It's a lot more that he develops even further in his technological goals. So he still wants to battle the pharaoh but he's using him more as a guinea pig for testing his transdimensional duel system rather than saying "fuck everything I'm gonna go duel dead people ANYWAY BECAUSE I'M AN EGOTISTICAL ASS” tho maybe he still wants some pharaoh dick who knows
#DSOD#dark side of dimensions#yugioh#yu-gi-oh!#seto kaiba#this is your captain speaking#I've seen this movie thrice now jesUS CHRIST
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