#i love this one very proud of how it came out
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soundwavefucker69 · 2 days ago
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I don't share this often, but I am a trans man named Minty.
awhile after I got my legal name change, I asked my mom what she would have named me if I was a boy. she said Sebastian, and I groaned and complained that I should have asked before I got the name change, because I really DID like Sebastian now that it was occurring to me as a possible name and had ALWAYS liked Sebastian, even before my MCU days as a teenager. I had even considered it as an option but worried I'd end up looking like a weird fandom kid that had never let go of the MCU. if I had known that was the name my mother had picked for me, I would have had justification to choose it.
she asked me why I picked Minty then. i kinda paused in surprise because I thought it was obvious. and I was like. well. I wanted a name i felt like I could associate with childhood me.
after the first house we lived in was foreclosed on by the bank, we had to rent while my parents fixed their credit and swore never to get a fixer upper again. so we picked a nice house in our small town with only two real neighbors of note: an old lady, whose kids had forgotten about her, that lived way down the alley, around the point it turned from paved to dirt, the only house down there, who had a pomegranate tree in her ill-tended front yard, and a nice old lady next door that for some inexplicable reason had a miniature horse and a beautifully tended flower garden she had foolishly once planted mint in. she also had a very, very old fashioned rotary telephone. I mean the kind hardwired into the wall, of metal, with a speaker with a smooth wooden handle that sat neatly on top. not one of the plastic ones. the ones you see in old movies.
we loved these old ladies very much. the pomegranate lady was too old to keep up on her yard, so my brother and I would go with our dad to help weed whack and scrape up the dead leaves. we didn't offer too much, she was a proud sort, and couldn't pay us, but just enough to help out a little. and the mint in her flower garden lady loved it when we came by to say hi to her horse whose name I forget and loved to teach us how to garden.
she would send us home with mint. obviously. because when you have a mint infestation, well. it's pointless, but you gotta try anyway. and my mom would take that mint and make sun tea, just on the edge of not sweet enough, bc she was a bit of a crunchy mom, but not enough to reprimand me for sneaking a bit of sugar into my cup after to mix it up. (the sugar never dissolved right, especially after it was chilled, and i would always make a racket trying to get it to do so)
I told her I picked Minty because it ties me to my childhood. I didn't want to just cast it away. I wasn't Minty yet, but I also wouldn't be Minty without those days.
mom hasn't fully come around to me being trans. but she was quiet for a long, long time before she kind of whispered. I think I like Minty better than Sebastian. you should keep it.
my mom has always beat herself up over our childhood. she lacked a lot of stability in her upbringing and thought church was the way to go with my brother and I. unfortunately, she picked the wrong church. it was intensely traumatizing for us. we've had a lot of tough conversations about it. but I was able to tell her that day, you know Mom, I know you think you didn't do enough, but just know I'm not trans because you put me in a place where womanhood was miserable and I'm running from it. I don't remember much of the church, even though it consumed my life. what I do remember is my mother, the woman I may have complicated feelings towards, but have always admired and was always my standard for womanhood, being criticized by the other women for allowing me to read this book or that book and not bending or breaking under their rebukes for twenty years. I remember finding out as a twenty year old that I was the only "girl" in church that got the HPV vaccine, because you wanted to protect me, and not rely on chastity alone, like some sort of egotistical maniac who believed I'd always be your daughter, not a living breathing person that would make choices you didn't approve of as an adult, that shouldn't have to suffer for no reason from those choices. I remember you reading to my brother and I well into our teen years, using your acting talents that didn't blossom into the career you wanted to bring the characters in Peter and the Starcatchers to life. I remember listening to Lord of the Rings on cassette tape in the mini van, even though they said it was demonic when they found out. I remember the mom that let me be a tomboy. I remember the mom that would put on the Wind and the Willows on cassette from the library on rainy summer days and we'd listen to it and eat meatballs and spaghetti in the kitchen.
I told her, you're not a failure as a mother, and I didn't hate womanhood because of your example. it just didn't fit me. you made mistakes because you're human. I never thought of you as less than because you're a woman, and I didn't want to escape the cage you're thinking i wanted to escape.
my mom cried. I think that was the first time i made her cry and didn't feel bad about it.
anyways. not a soft memory, but it feels soft to me.
Tell me a soft memory
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unnamed-proxy · 1 day ago
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Drawing every toon currently available for a pet project, pt 3-4/22
Sprout and Cosmo!!
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slaaverin · 3 days ago
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Jikook came home today and I couldn't be happier 💜🥺 They will be insufferable once they get out I can already feel it 😂😅 I missed them 😭
Today I wanted to talk about something that was showcased on AYS, I call it The Smugness of Mr. Jeon Jungkook™
Smugness of what you may ask?
The absolute cocky pride of having The Park Jimin Extraordinaire as a boyfriend.
I can't say I didn't love it when I watched.
Jungkook couldn't help to show him off on every occasions
This is the man in question showcased plainly by Jungkook:
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Also very important to include him between food shots in case we didn't know Park Jimin was also part of his "special" food regimen *cough*
He felt the urge to inform us that his crush gives him the most attention:
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"Look at my boyfriend, he's doing very boyfriendy stuff with me because he is mine, my crush, mine only and his attention is just for me, look at him good because you're having none of it"
Ok 🤨
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He's really rubbing it in our faces that only he has the Ultimate Boyfriend Privilege™
Jungkook, this is a bit cruel
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He even reached peak smugness. The pride. The power move. The "We're Kings of the world" attitude. We get it, he is yours. Jungkook really is a fool in love 💜
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Still keeping his little smirk.
"Look at my boyfriend, he's sick and miserable but look how good he still looks, how both of us look absolutely stunning together, I'm having the time of my life, stay mad losers"
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Of course Jimin looks good even sick and at any time as a matter of fact, even while he sleeps, and Jungkook is still stunned by it. What a sight indeed.
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Because Jeon Jungkook thinks Jimin is prettier than clouds and can't help but scream it to the world. It's all very natural. So obviously he is proud that Jimin is his boyfriend.
Jimin is not just anybody. He's so special and the fact jungkook has him makes him one of the luckiest man in the world (and vice versa) but he really put the nail in the coffin about this in AYS. Just in case we didn't get it.
DON'T WORRY JK GOD WE GET IT WE LEAVE HIM TO YOU
Do you get how insane is that growth? From 2015-2016 when Jungkook was so shy and sometimes closed off? To THIS TODAY?
That escalated quickly.
Now he has no fear anymore and doesn't hesitate to tell and show and express his love he has for Jimin and his pride to have him.
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Jimin is funny because he didn't do it as often like Jungkook during AYS, he was more lowkey, but the one time he actually did the same it was PURE INSANITY
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I mean Jimin doesn't play often but when he does he plays big game. Like go big or go home. He literally spelled it out for us.
Yes he is your boyfriend. Yes. Yes yes yes. We know he looks cute.
I also love how they both took time to film each other as well. This was clearly their main focus.
Aahhhh it makes my heart so happy for them. They admire each other. They are glad to be together and they show it to us freely.
What a time to be a jikooker, what a journey.
They aren't the ace duo for nothing and will always be a power couple 🔥
Good for them 😌
Take care everybody 💜
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ancha-aus · 3 days ago
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Gifted Drabble - NewAgeAU - The Eclipse
I am back again and I got a big boy drabble for you today @spotaus
After the amazing drabble they did about Nightmare losing the magic. I decided it was about time I tried my hands at the event that brought forth the magic!
Also we are back to Ccino POV. I don't know what it is about him in this series I just love him dearly and adore his POV. Once we move more into the story I will probably do other people's POVs haha.
Warnings! We are in for a rough time because Ccino never has it easy and that is like 90% my fault. There is past abuse, past starvation, victim blaming (kinda), there is gaslighting, there is manipulation. Implied future abuse.
There is a lot and I need you to be aware of this.
Also... It... may be a bit long? As in 10K words long. So... just so you know it is long. With that out of the way! Lets Go!
*--------------------------------------*
Ccino isn’t sure what to feel. He knows he should be proud and feel excited. Today was the twin’s birthdays. They were finally turning thirteen. Something everyone in the kingdom has been excited for for the last few years as this day grow closer.
Ccino sighs as he feels his body shake. Even as he makes sure that Nightmare’s outfit is spotless. It is a beautiful light yellow. It will fit in perfectly amongst the golden and yellow decorations but Ccino can only assume it is on purpose. To show Nightmare’s rank and position as prince as Dream ascends. To see they belong together and are connected by their bond as twins.
Nightmare frows as he tugs on his shelves. Ccino gently takes his hand and removes it from the soft fabric “Hey. It is okay my prince.” He puts the sleeves back in place and is happy to note there are no ruffles.
Nightmare frowns as he turns his skull away. Ccino frowns as he makes sure the outfit is perfect.
Nightmare mutters “Still think they are stupid for making you wear pink…”
Ccino blinks and looks down at his undershirt. It is a very soft light pink and there are yellow accents. He smiles as he twists his skull a bit to enable himself to look better at Nightmare “Really? Why is that my prince?”
Nightmare shrugs and mutters “Pink doesn’t suit you… beige is better.”
Ccino smiles “I do love the neutral and nature colours… But your brother was allowed to pick everything for his big day.” And it was only fitting that the new king’s gift was exactly as he wanted-
Ccino shakes his skull. He needs to stop thinking about it like that. He isn’t the one who matters here.
Nightmare is anxious. Nightmare’s twin is about to be crowned and become king. Complete this mysterious ritual. Ccino had to be there for him. Nightmare had found information and mentions about this great sacrifice and pain. Something that Dream had to do or experience to ascend to godhood.
Nightmare had come to him near tears. Terrified his brother would be hurt by this ritual that was going to happen no matter what. Nightmare had said he had tried to warn Dream but Dream just told him he was nervous and that everything would be okay. That Dream would become a god like their mother and Dream would rule their kingdom.
Nightmare had spoken about how he had gone to his mother with his worries but Nim just dismissed him. That Nim had just told him he was seeing things wrong again and that he was letting silly ideas get the better of him again.
Ccino isn’t surprised she was like that. Nim is just like that. A terrible and horrible-
Ccino stops himself. He can never be sure what she knows and what she doesn’t.
Instead, even back when Nightmare came to him, he concentrated on helping Nightmare. Helping him calm down before looking at what he had found.
Ccino wasn’t even sure what it was but he knew… he knew that Nightmare was correct. This magic, this ritual it is dangerous.
But there is nothing Ccino could do to help him. Ccino doesn’t know magic. He can’t even do magic. He knows nothing about magic or what it all means. He was only able to hold Nightmare close until he fell asleep for the night. Ccino letting him sleep in his room with him to help him feel safe.
Ccino doesn’t know magic…
But Ccino remembers… He thinks he remembers at least… He believes that his mother used to sing… That she could do magical things with music. Ccino thinks their little house used to be filled with music.
His father had these... magical kisses? Ccino thinks so at least… That his father could give kisses when you were hurt or sad and everything felt better… Something about his magic only working because of Ccino and his mom…
Ccino thinks so at least…
He can’t really remember what his father looked like…
He just knows he is supposed to look like his mom… but he isn’t sure as he can’t remember her well either… It has been so long
Nightmare shifts before him and Ccino pulls himself out of his mindless thinking. Ccino turns Nightmare around and hums “The yellow looks nice on you…”
Nightmare pulls on his shirt anxiously “You think so? I think it looks weird… yellow fits Dream. Not me.”
Ccino smiles as he knows how to handle this easily “Really? I think it looks nice.” he gently takes Nightmare’s hands as Ccino ignores the scars on those small bones from his practise cuts “Yellow compliments purple after all. Makes your eye lights stand out more.”
Nightmare looks deeply embarrassed but has a shy smile “Really?”
Ccino smiles “Have I ever lied to you?”
Nightmare shakes his skull and looks a bit more relaxed as he looks back into the mirror. Ccino looks him over and smiles. Nightmare, and Dream, has grown into a fine young teen.
Ccino can’t help but be proud of both the twins. Ccino has always been closer to Nightmare as Dream had many others who seemed to want to answer his every request. Which meant that Ccino just focused on Nightmare when he could. Make sure the younger twin didn’t feel left behind.
Ccino is proud to say that he managed it. Nightmare is happy and never mentioned feeling alone. He mentioned missing his twin when he went to his classes but aside from that Nightmare was happy and healthy. Dream was too.
The twins adore each other and are the closest friends. Both are happy and healthy.
All in all. Ccino thinks he has been doing a great job with helping and raising them.
Ccino hums as he moves to Nightmare’s front and starts putting up the little golden and sun jewellery. Careful all in the right spots. Decorating his thin neck and the fragile wrists.
Last Ccino picks up the small silver crown and places it on Nightmare’s skull “Almost done my prince.”
Nightmare stares at him “We are alone.” And he waits.
Ccino blinks and smiles softly “My prince-” Nightmare frowns more. Ccino sighs but can’t stop smiling “Nightmare. You know I have to address you properly.” He can’t stop himself as he rubs the smaller skull and Nightmare leans into it happily “I am just a servant. People can’t see me disrespecting you like that.”
Nightmare frowns again “I don’t care.” And he glares more “and you are not just a servant. You are you.”
Ccino smiles and nuzzles him softly “I know you don’t care Nightmare. And I would like to not care either. But… it isn’t right or how it works…” he gives him a sad smile.
Nightmare frowns and mutters “Maybe… When Dream is king he can change that?” he looks a bit more hopeful.
Anxiety returns to his soul. Ccino doesn’t want to be important and known… He forces it back down as he gives a gentle smile “As king he won’t get the chance to do such things until much later Nightmare. He can’t risk being seen as weak or someone who is easy to disrespect. Once things calm down we can maybe ask him. Okay?” much later.
Nightmare frowns and mutters “Who would disrespect him? He would be a king and a god!” and he looks at Ccino.
Ccino feels bad. Seeing as he doesn’t respect Nim at all. And Nim is like that. Ccino instead gives him a tiny grin “Some people will just be like that. Even if they don’t have a good reason. And no matter how much you want them to you can’t change their minds.” He rubs his cheek “Which means you can only focus on what matters to you and the country.”
Nightmare frowns before nodding “I can do that for him. Help him.” He rubs his arm and whispers “Do… do you think the… the bad thing will happen?”
Ccino frowns “I am not sure Nightmare. I am so sorry…” he can’t help him when it matters… Ccino wasn’t even sure why he thought he could help either of them in a way that matters.
Nightmare leans into his touch and mutters “At least you believe me.”
Ccino feels a bit better as he speaks softly “And I always will. Even if no one else believes you. I will. I will be there for you. I swear.” It is an easy promise to make to him.
Nightmare actually smiles this time.
Ccino relaxes as he slowly gets the paint and make up out “Ready for the last finishing touches?”
Nightmare nods and takes a seat. Ccino gets the paint and gets to work. Ccino had to do these very early on for both the twins. Dream would want to get up and move around while Nightmare would patiently wait for Ccino to finish and for the make up to dry. Ccino never minded it of course. It was fun! It reminded him of finger painting and practising make up with his mom. It are dear memories.
Ccino starts with a bit of paint by Nightmare’s cheeks and his chin. To make sure the edges look softer and a bit rounder. Next he adds a very small line of golden yellow around the very edge of his sockets. Ccino hadn’t been lying after all, yellow did help make purple stand out more and with this is made the purple pop. Ccino then took the silver and with the utmost care he painted the phases of the moon from one temple to the other across the forehead. Making sure the full moon was at the very center. Ccino didn’t even need to redo it today.
Ccino smiles as he takes a step back “All ready.” He washes the paint and make up from his phalanges.
Nightmare hops off his chair and looks into the mirror “Will you have to also do Dream’s paints?”
Ccino shakes his skull “Not today. I believe the king is helping your twin prepare.” He finishes cleaning himself up and puts everything back to its spot.
Nightmare nods as he looks into the mirror anxiously “It is okay… it is fine… Dream will be fine…” he tugs on his shirt again.
Ccino joins his side and frees the shirt from the tight hold. After it he tugs it all back in place before stepping back “There. You are ready my prince.” And he gives a small bow “Very soon. Crown prince.”
Nightmare rubs his arm. Luckily the material the shirt is made of doesn’t crumble easily and it remains looking nice and puffy. Ccino needs to make sure Nightmare looks fine and no one can say anything rude to Nightmare about it.
Ccino joins his side and smiles “Hey… Nighty?” Nightmare immediately looks at him. Ccino keeps smiling. Praying it helps relax him “You are going to do amazing. You will look stunning together with your twin and you two have bright futures ahead of you.”
Nightmare gives a very slow nod before he mutters “Will you be nearby? I know it is private and only for the inner circle until the real crowning but… Will you please be near?”
Ccino smiles “Yeah. I will be close by.” For completely different reasons…
Nightmare relaxes and smiles brightly “Thank you… I need you there to feel brave.”
Ccino feels like his soul is gripped as he gives him a gentle hug. Making sure not to mess up Nightmare’s outfit or make up “You don’t need me for that Nightmare. You are the bravest monster I know. But I will be there okay? You will see me right there okay? And if you start feeling scared or unsure you can look at me and know that there will always be people who believe in you and are there for you. Okay?” He rubs the cheek.
Nightmare pushes his face more into it and lets out a soft purr “Thank you.”
Ccino smiles “I am happy to be there for you. Both of you.” He hears footsteps in the distance and quickly takes his hand back as he steps back. Nightmare looks confused for a moment before the door behind him opens.
Ccino bows to the captain entering “Captain.”
The captain, a bird monster by the name of Falks, dismisses him but that is alright. Ccino doesn’t mind at all. He knows that most of the higher ups kind of know the deal that is about to happen.
Captain Falks bows to Nightmare “Hello my prince. I am here to lead you to the king and the future king.”
Nightmare nods before looking back at Ccino “See you soon Ccino.” And he follows the captain out.
Ccino makes sure to remain in his spot until the door closes. When it closes he feels all the tension return as the need to hide in one of the tunnels returns. He doesn’t want to go there.
He doesn’t want to be at the ritual.
Because… That will be the moment that he…
That his…
He is right now the king’s after all. Nim just only had use for him as babysitter and servant. Ccino knows… he knows what the little apple patterns on his clothes mean after all.
Ccino feels his breath quicken as he grabs a hold on the vanity and gasps as his breath gets shorter and shorter. He stares at himself for a moment before looking away. He can’t stand the sight of himself. Seeing himself hurts… Seeing himself brings back memories he can’t quite remember and pain and fear from long ago. He can’t deal with that. He can’t.
Ccino gasps as he takes a seat on the ground and curls up more. This is it… today… he will be… he won’t…
He… he is never going to see Nightmare ever again? Is he?
He doesn’t know what the ritual does. Not exactly.
But Nim had pulled him aside and given him an idea. How it changes the person. How it increases their power and that with it came the knowledge that they were more important than any mortals. That their power and their ability to hold and manage that power is the proof.
That once Dream gets the power he will finally get the power he deserves. He will have the power and knowledge that will make him the god among people.
That Ccino will be there for him in any way he wishes. For anything he wants.
Any. Thing.
Ccino feels gross just thinking about it.
Footsteps in the hallway and Ccino has to pull himself together. He forces himself back to his feet even if his whole body shakes. Even if he can’t stand the sight of everything around him.
He just manages to pull his face into a more neutral look and slow his panicked breathing when the door opens. Some guards stand ready and mutter about bringing Ccino to the room to prepare him for the ritual.
Ccino follows the guards. His soul pulsing fast enough that Ccino is starting to feal dizzy. He keeps his breaths short as he follows the familiar path.
They end by the healing bay and he is left by the door. The door opens and two medics are there already. They rush Ccino in and comment about him being later than expected. Ccino apologises as he stands in the room.
He hears the two healers talk as he stares ahead of himself. Trying so hard not to hear. He doesn’t want to hear it.
Ccino stares ahead of himself. The other wall has shelves which hold a lot of different items and potions. Ccino knows that some of those are against exhaustion and to give more energy. There are health boosters and even a few that will just knock you out. All different colours.
The scents are making his already dizzy skull spin and pound. He may be starting to get migraine.
The doctor snaps “Ccino!”
Ccino blinks and turns slightly “Yes sir?”
The doctor, Nigel, looks annoyed while the other healer, Mar, giggles “Don’t be mad at him. Can you blame him? He will be the future King’s first mate.” They sigh wishfully “I am so jealous… I wish I could be the one who helped Dream like that.”
They disgust Ccino. Ccino doesn’t care that technically Dream is about to magically become an adult. He is a child! One who barely started puberty! How could they think about him like that? Like they are just waiting for him to grow up so they can… so they can think and do those things to him?!
Doctor Nigel sighs annoyed as he stares at Ccino “When did you last eat and what?”
Ccino needs to think. He hadn’t eaten that morning… He hasn’t had dinners in ages much like lunches. His last breakfast was… “Day before yesterday.” If he is correct.
The doctor looks annoyed “Seriously? You pigging out again? You know that you need to look your best.” He sighs as he shakes his head.
Ccino just looks down. He just had been so hungry. He had felt so empty and tired. He had thought… Maybe a little wouldn’t be bad? Just to get a bit of energy.
Nigel looks at him expecting “What did you eat?”
Ccino looks to the side. Feeling guilty “Had some toast… and some yogurt and milk.” It had been so good. He had felt full after it and sighed happily.
The doctor huffs “Pigging. Out.”
The other giggles “Oh let him pig out. Maybe then King Dream will see that he is not that much anyway. Let someone who is actually pretty get a chance to please our new lord.” They sigh wishfully again.
Nigel shoots his colleague a look “Stop it. You can try to get in his harem once he is established.” He turns back to side as he grabs a step stool “The first mate always dies quickly anyone. They are there for the king to test their power and magic after all. Rather painful from what I understand.” He points towards the step stool “Undress and on the step stool.”
Ccino feels sick and feels his soul pulse anxiously but his body does as ordered. He feels beyond exposed as he stands there. Staring downwards as the two doctors circle him and comment on things. He can hardly hear it. His skull hurts.
Doctor Nigel hums “Luckily none of the lashes gave permanent marks after all. It would be unsightly for our future king to see marks of disobedience.” He makes a note as he moves on and checks his ribs and spine. Touching it and Ccino tries to ignore how invasive it feels. “Age?”
Ccino needs a moment to think “Twenty.”
He hums and makes a note “That should fertile then. Good. Summon your ecto.”
Ccino really doesn’t want to. His soul is filled with anxiety but he tries.
Nothing happens.
The doctor looks annoyed “I said. Summon the ecto.”
Ccino doesn’t look up “I can’t… I don’t have enough energy or magic.” Maybe he can’t summon it at all anymore. Maybe it is broken? Would that mean he doesn’t have to worry about this whole thing anymore? If he is unable to summon the parts needed… If he is too broken to serve his purpose…
The doctor grumbles as he walks to the cabinet and searches through the bottles before pulling one out “Here. Drink it.”
Ccino looks at the bright orange liquid and feels sick just looking at it. It smells gross. It looks disgusting. It is much too solid to be a normal drink.
Mar laughs as they smirk at him “What is wrong? Suddenly not a glutton anymore?”
Ccino doesn’t want to… But he remembers the pain of the lashes. The way each one burned. They way they would wait between the hits. Until his back was fully healed before giving the next one. Healing it magically, fast and aggressive which left his back tender and hurting of pains that weren’t there anymore. Then the next lash would hit.
He still feels the pain sometimes. Which is dumb. Ccino knows he isn’t hurt anymore. It got healed years ago and it doesn’t hurt. There is nothing there that could hurt. Everyone told him as much. To stop acting as if he is hurt when he was fine.
Ccino downs the potion as ordered. It is gross and sticks to his throat and it feels unpleasant. The unknown and different magic in the potion makes him sick but he stands there.
Nigel nods “Now. That should give you enough magic and mana to at least last through the night for our new King. Now summon so I can inspect your ecto.”
Ccino feels sick but does as ordered. He focusses on his soul. Even if the pulsing of it is uneven and anxious it is better than to think about the hands touching his ecto. Hands he doesn’t want to touch him anywhere.
He stares ahead. Staring at the different coloured bottles. Two are purple. One is blue. There is a green one on the side. Most of them don’t have a colour and three are yellow. All on different shelves. None of them have labels.
Doctor Nigel steps back as he takes notes “Seems fine and stable enough. A bit too round but that is too be expected from your gluttonous nature.” The doctor makes notes.
The other giggles “Best hope the king likes them heavier.” And Mar giggle again.
Ccino hates it here.
The doctor shoots his colleague a look “Behave. It will not look good for you if the first mate doesn’t like your behaviour.” And he shoots Ccino a look “You can get dressed again. Others will come pick you up soon to get ready.” And he turns to his desk. The other doctor huffs and shoots Ccino a jealous look.
Ccino would willingly and gladly trade places. Do it. Take his place. He doesn’t want to be some offering to placate a newly ascended god. Ccino knows what everyone implies he will do to do that. He feels sick.
Either way he gets dressed in the much too soft cotton with the almost silky feel to it. It is soft as he tugs on it. His soul feels like it has permanently moved to his throat. He still feels dizzy, the other magic in his body makes him feel sick.
Everything about this makes him ill. He wants to hide. Just not go. Fuck it. Stay in the hidden tunnels and just keep hiding there until they give up on searching for him. No one ever found him in those tunnels anyway.
The image of Nightmare looking hopefully into the crowd when he feels nervous. Ccino not being there.
He can’t… He can’t break his promise to Nightmare.
The door opens and a few maids walk in. They all seem excited and happily tug Ccino with them. They talk about how lucky he is and how he doesn’t need to worry! That people will make sure he looks pretty and then the new King will not be able to keep his hands to himself!
Ccino just smiles and nods. Not sure if he can keep himself from throwing up if he starts talking.
They get to the large dressing room. Normally used for making and fabricating outfits for the royals and nobles. Ccino feels his anxiety returns as the maids leave him with the seamstress Sasha. Sasha looks beyond excited as she looks at different outfits.
She hums happily “I am so excited! It is the greatest honour to have been allowed to make your outfit. I made a few options and the current king and future king already expressed their preference!” she smiles brightly as she holds up different outfits “I have a few that were approved upon and I made sure they will fit the decorations!”
Ccino nods as he lets her talk. Everywhere there are flags and banners with little suns on them. The symbol of Dream. A small sun for the golden prince. Dream had been so excited when they picked his symbol when the twins turned ten. Nightmare had been excited about his own symbol in the form of the moon.
Ccino watches as the seamstress pulls out this beautiful dress. Lower back and cuts by the lower part and legs to enable easy movement.
Sasha smiles as she holds it up “I know I know. A dress is the go to but I wanted to try just in case! Please put it on.”
Ccino takes the clothing item and gets dressed. Feeling numb to the exposed feeling by now. He waits on the verdict.
She beams “Oh you are so pretty!” she looks excited as she rushes to the other outfits she laid out “But I think the dress isn’t your fit after all. Don’t get me wrong you look gorgeous but it just doesn’t seem right! It doesn’t show off your best sides well as it is designed to look good on people with more curves.”
Ccino is never sure what people want from him. Some say he is too fat and a glutton. Others say he doesn’t have enough curves. He really tried to do as ordered and only eat and drink what he is supposed to. He doesn’t understand why his body isn’t like they want by now. He swears he tried.
He is so tired.
Sasha brings out this pants and shirt set which feels a bit more comfortable. Ccino doesn’t like how open the back is as it gives him bad memories. The only times his back was uncovered was when they… they…
The shirt itself is very tight around his neck. And shows off most of his spine. The pants themselves hang low on his hip bones. Barely staying up as it is while the pants legs are long and cover him to the ankles.
The seamstress hums as she looks considered “This shows off your skeleton nature much better than the dress did! Your spine is so clean and pretty! I am sure the king would love to be able to see it easily! I will have to make a note of that for any future outfits!” she makes a note as she grabs the next outfit.
The shirt has shoulder pads this time and covers his spine a lot better. The sides are mostly open but it isn’t as short as the other one and it only shows a bit of his lower spine.
Instead of pants this outfit has more of a skirt to it. It still hangs low on his hips but there is a very short tight pants under the skirt to keep it in place. The sides of his legs are almost completely uncovered aside from the tight pants but the skirt part gives him at least the illusion of modesty.
Sasha hums as she looks between the outfits “I think that one is best.” She smiles a t him “Feeling pretty and ready to rock the new king’s world?” she is trying to hype him up.
Ccino gives a small smile and speaks softly “Mostly nervous.” Which is the most truthful and honest thing he can safely say.
She gasps “What? You don’t need to be nervous! He is going to be so happy to see you! You are so pretty he is going to be blown away!”
Ccino doesn’t feel pretty. He just feels sick and uncomfortable. It is so close now. Before he could mostly ignore it but now it is really going to happen. He is going to be promoted from babysitter to sex slave. And there is not a single thing he can do about it. Yet Ccino is the idiot and weird one for not being excited.
He wants to cry.
He takes his seat as the seamstress talks about his make up and what she picked out. It is mostly just some touch up. She mentions that putting much more on would just make him look fake and make him lose his natural beauty.
She disappears to the corner where she opens a locked box. There are golden chains in there. Well, not actually chains but necklaces and bracelets apparently, they may as well be chains though. Ccino watches as the other puts them on him. By his arms. His ribs. One as a choker. She coos and praises how pretty he looks. Ccino doesn’t feel like he is all there anymore.
Heavy steps and moments later the door opens.
The seamstress bows deeply and Ccino looks down as well. Making a bow as far as he can without disrupting any of the work done on him.
A moment of silence before a pleased hum “Good. You got cleaned up and made yourself look presentable. Come. We are about to start.”
As they walk Nim reminds him once more of what his role will be and what he will do. Ccino echoes the instructions back to her when prompted.
He is lead into the throne room and there is a silence. Ccino feels his arm start to shake as he makes his way towards his spot. Ccino tries not to panic.
This is it. There is no turning back now.
Ccino just stands in his spot. Near enough to step forwards when it is his time. Ccino tries not to think about what will happen to him after today. What his life will be after this. Ccino glances around.
There aren’t as many people as he would expect. The only people are the king’s advisors. The captain of the guard and a few extra guards. And Ccino of course.
None of the maids or servants are actually here with them.
Ccino glances around and sees people all getting ready. A priest as well. To perform the crowning of Dream as Nim will be unavailable.
Ccino… Ccino doesn’t like this ritual or what he knows about it.
From what he understand… the king will give up her magic. Make it form something for Dream to take and consume. Consuming the magic will give him powers and magic and the ability to ascend. Then. Once it is time. Something of great emotional importance is supposed to happen. That the magic will guide Dream to do what is needed for him to finish ascending.
Once ascended. Dream will be first crowned to the small select group here and then to the kingdom as a whole.
Ccino is supposed to step forwards when Dream finishes his ritual but before he is crowned. Ccino will join his side and remain there through everything.
Ccino still doesn’t understand how it will affect Dream. All the king ever told him was that Dream would within seconds grow from teen to an adult and all the feelings, knowledge and emotions that came with it would happen all at once. That it would make Dream ready to rule. The ritual would give him the understanding for what happened and how so he can perform it himself when the time is right.
Ccino thinks it isn’t right.
But maybe that is just him. He doesn’t like the magic in this place. His memories still see magic as the voice of his mother singing and some stuff moving on their own to help her with chores. Of his father holding him close and giving a kiss to his little bruises and them feeling better. They told him magic was about joy and love.
Here… they always spoke about rituals and blood and sacrifices. Ccino had seen them sacrifice animals before.
He doesn’t like it.
He hates it.
Ccino had had to clean up cuts on Nightmare’s hands from past rituals. All in preparation. Nightmare had been near tears as it hurt. Ccino remembers telling him that it can’t be actually that good of magic if it hurts him.
Ccino isn’t sure if he was even helping at this point…
Not that it matters… He probably won’t see Nightmare much after this… As he will just… be wherever and whatever Dream wants him to be and do and-
No. Stop. Don’t think about it.
Ccino tries to distract himself.
The hall is decorated with large banners. All with pictures and images of the sun and light. Gold in colour and making the room seem lighter.
Ccino suddenly understands his outfit colour choice. It seems to mirror the colours of a sunrise.
Nim steps out of the side door and walks towards her throne, her mask on her face. She stands before it as the hall is immediately quiet. Moments later Dream and Nightmare walk out together and stand on both of her sides, both wearing their own masks.
Nightmare looks anxious and Ccino manages to catch his eye through the tiny openings of the owl mask. Nightmare seems to relax a little.
That is good.
That is much better.
The King speaks up and her voice sounds out “We are here today. For the next step in our glorious kingdom. As I will ascend to take my rightful place among the stars. As my son will take his own rightful place. A god on this world. Like myself.”
Excitement rises in the room as Nim raises her arms and hands to her chest. And It lights up.
It is scorching hot. It is burning.
The light is bright as Nim holds out the light. It slowly condenses into a single form. A glowing apple. She turns slowly. Her body already starting to fall apart as she starts to dust. Her hand holds out the glowing apple to Dream.
Dream wiggles slightly in place before raising his mask to the top of his face to reveal the big smile before looking serious again as he steps forwards. He holds out his arms and hands.
Nim stands still for a moment before she places the apple in his hands but keeps holding on.
Dream looks determined and nods “Thank you. Mother. May you rise to be above the other gods.”
Nim nods and lets go of the apple. As soon as the contact is gone. She is gone. She falls apart and her mask falls on top of the pile of dust.
The apple is a perfect golden colour. It isn’t shining anymore but it reflects the light beautifully.
Dream steps forwards and smiles “Hello everyone. For this glorious day. As the old king and my mother takes her rightful place among the stars and gods. As I stand before you to claim my own place in the growing history of our family. To make them proud and do as they hava done before me.”
Ccino notices Nightmare looks nervous as he shoots him looks. Ccino gives him a tiny smile and Nightmare seems to relax before he gains a look of focus in those eye lights.
Dream smiles as he raises his arms up high.
Which is when Nightmare rushes him and tackles his brothers. The two twins struggle for a moment before Nightmare manages to grab the apple and take a few steps away.
Dream stares from his spot on the ground in shock “Nightmare?!”
Nightmare doesn’t say anything. He is shaking lightly before Nightmare finds his eye sight again. Nightmare raises his own owl mask to the top of his skull, he takes a deep breath and bites into the apple.
Something in his body changes. Ccino can see an almost hazed look on Nightmare’s face as he bites. And bites. And bites. Eating the apple even if he seems to almost choke on the mouthfuls.
And then the apple is gone. Core and all.
Nightmare stands there for a moment before starting to lean to one side before leaning towards the other. His body shaking. He starts to shake more and more as Nightmare rolls up as he hugs his own form. Then Nightmare starts screaming and sobbing as he falls to his knees.
Ccino feels his own body shake. Ccino feels himself take a step closer.
He is hurt… He needs to…
A guard stops him.
Ccino can’t look away from Nightmare. Nightmare is just shaking and sobbing as he stays on his knees.
A cracking of bones. The ripping of clothing. And large limbs burst out of Nightmare’s back. Ccino sees them move and wriggling around dripping of Nightmare’s blood. But Ccino watches as the red colour darkens little by little until it is a solid black instead. It continues to drip on the ground as Nightmare shudders.
Then he stops. Everything stops. The screaming, the shaking, the sobbing.
Silence.
Nightmare slowly rises to his feet. The goop moving and dripping slowly off his form to drip on the ground. Nightmare looks around the room. His clothes ripped in many places as parts of it remain on the ground covered with that same sticky black goop that used to be red and liquid and his blood.
“How could you!?”
Nightmare blinks and turns to stare at Dream. Dream glares at him as he shakes with pure rage.
Dream screams “How could you?!”
Nightmare however doesn’t react. He just keeps staring at his brother. Ccino… Ccino doesn’t like the look on his face. It is the same look as with the apple… Ccino also doesn’t like the look on Dream’s face. The open rage and anger.
Dream knows magic. Nightmare does not.
Ccino doesn’t think and rushes away from his spot. The guard who had a hold on him before had let go in shock. Ccino side steps any hands as he rushes to the raised platform and thrones. He rushes up the stairs and gets between the twins. Holding hands up to both of them as he gives them both a strict look “No fighting.” He would have wanted his voice to be louder. But he can’t. Even now he can’t shout at either of them. He never could.
Dream looks away with angry tears in his eyes. Nightmare freezes as he stares at him. Ccino looks back at him.
His face isn’t the same anymore. The sockets are all wrong and the eye lights aren’t right either. Nightmare is much taller and doesn’t look in anyway like he did. The magic that he emits is even different.
But… the angle of those shoulders… Nightmare is scared and confused.
Ccino needs to get them somewhere else. He needs to get them out of view of others. They need to calm down and they need to figure out what is next. Was… Was Nightmare instructed by Nim to eat the apple after all? But… that doesn’t make sense?
No. Focus. No use trying to figure stuff out when it isn’t the priority. Get the twins to the back. Get them situated.
Ccino takes a deep breath before turning towards the waiting crowd with a smile on his face. He makes sure to tugs his hands behind the small of his back as he speaks with his cheerful people pleasing voice “We will be in the back to clean up before we continue. Please excuse our new king and the crown prince for just a moment.” And he bows deeply before shooting Dream a look and motioning towards the back.
Dream still looks angry but does as told as he moves towards the back. Ccino rises and gives a deep bow to Nightmare “My lord?” Nightmare is king now… right? so he should do this?
Nightmare looks bothered. It isn’t the same face he pulls but it is the same reaction as before. At least that look from the apple is gone. He just looks confused and overwhelmed. Nightmare moves towards the back without a single glance into anyone’s direction. Ccino uses the general confusion to rush into the room after them.
Okay. Okay.
What now?
The room is quiet as Dream continues to glare at Nightmare. Nightmare frowns at him as he raises a hand “Dream… I…” he shakes his skull as that glint in his eye lights returns before he manages to shake it.
Dream glares as he shakes “How could you! I trusted you! Everyone always said you just wanted the throne! I defended you! Said you would never betray me! Yet you do?!” angry tears appear in his sockets as he glares.
Nightmare shakes his skull again. “I didn’t… I didn’t want to. I…” He frowns. So confused.
The door slams open and Ccino notices Nightmare flinch at the sound before Ccino is grabbed and turned around. Captain Falks is there glaring “What the fuck did you do?!”
Ccino blinks as two more guards join them. Ccino looks back at Nightmare and Dream “I… I got them out of sight? Stopped them from fighting.”
Falks groans “Yes! That is the problem! You stopped the ritual!”
Ccino feels any insecurity and nerves leave him as it replaces him with rage “Of course I did?! In case you didn’t notice! It went terrible! Of course I got them out of sight and calm before they could hurt each other!”
Captain Falks glares “The leftover prince was never supposed to take the apple! This is a disaster! He was supposed to just be there for the future King of Light Dream!” Falks glares at the twins before glaring at Ccino again “This is a mess and you made it worse.”
Ccino flinches as he looks to the side “What is done is done… We need to be quick…” he glances back and can’t help but notice that Nightmare is very much barely dressed at this point as he ripped out of his clothing and Dream is overdressed with the too large clothing. Swimming in the bright orange cape and the softer coloured dress pants and shirt. Ccino nods to himself “We will need to get them both ready quickly. A new outfit for King Nightmare is a must. He can’t be crowned when he is barely dressed. Dream will need cloths that are form fitted for him now instead of how he could have been.” His mind is racing as he looks over to the two guards behind Falks.
It are cadet Rogers and Cadet Miles. Okay. Ccino has seen them before and they are both ambitious but are loyal to the crown. Ccino looks at Miles “Miss Miles. Can you get back to the hall and keep the people calm? We may need more refreshments for them.” Miles gives a nod and Ccino focuses on Rogers “Cadet Rogers. We need to make sure we aren’t bothered. Can you make sure to stand guard?” Cadet Rogers nods with a salute and moves to the door together with cadet Miles. Ccino looks at Falks “Captain. We need the priest to remain here and remain ready to crown Nightmare and vow him in. While I get the prince and king ready you need to go to the priest and give him a small update that Nightmare will be sworn in instead-”
Falks glares “Who do you think you are to order me and my guards around?”
Ccino freezes before giving him a look “We need to act quickly and adapt to the change.”
Falks huffs as he looks disgusted  “I will not serve a fake king.”
A moment of silence and shock goes through Ccino. He also feels… rejected? Dejected? It doesn’t make sense. Ccino instead focusses on the moment “How is he a fake king?”
Falks huffs “You are an idiot. He was never meant to be king. He was there to make sure that Dream would rise to his rightful place. Not be a useless and jealous brat and take it for himself! He didn’t even finish the ritual!”
Ccino glares “He did.”
Falks smirks “Oh believe me. He did not.”
Ccino glares as he starts to recount what he knows “He ate the apple. Legends speak that anyone unworthy of absorbing the magic would perish. Nightmare survived and was able to gain the power it gave. Meaning the magic decided him worthy.” Falks blinks but Ccino continues “Nightmare is a son of the old king Nim just like Dream. Are you really disrespecting the royal bloodline?” Falks looks a lot more worried. Ccino goes for the finishing blow “Not to forget. The ritual spoke of a large betrayal. I do believe. That eating the apple and betraying his twin would count as such.”
Ccino may not agree with any of these thought and believes followed by these people. But he knows how to speak their language and play their game. “That means. That our new king is Nightmare. Who completed the ritual.”
Falks suddenly looks a lot more unsure before he hisses to Ccino “You best remember your place slave. And if I had it my way I would show it to your personally. Your pretty face can’t save you from all the consequences.”
Ccino doesn’t feel fear. He just feels rage. “Oh I remember my place just fine. My duty, as ordered by the old king, is to be by the new king’s side and help him in any way I can. I am doing exactly as I was instructed. I think it is time you remember your own oaths and vows Captain. As you are supposed to protect, guard and serve the ruling king yourself.”
Falks glares harshly at him “When this is over. I will take great pleasure in punishing you and your bratty mouth. Seems like the last twenty I gave you did not make much of an impression. Maybe with fifty lashes you will learn your place.”
Ccino raises a brow “Ask our king when it is calm. We both have our duties. Yours should be to make sure everything in the hall is still fine so we can move on to the coronation.” Ccino glares at him “The priest needs to be informed as I prepare our king.”
There is a silence in the room. The two cadets stare at Ccino and their captain but Ccino doesn’t care. He knows he will be in trouble for this. A lot of trouble and he does not enjoy knowing he will be punished later for ignoring the hierarchy and rules.
But Nightmare needs him now. Even if Nightmare doesn’t seem the same. It is still Nighty. Ccino used to tug him into bed with a  bedtime story. Ccino used to cut both Nightmare’s and Dream’s food into tiny pieces to make eating easier for them.
Ccino is not going to fail them now because some stupid birdbrain decided he wanted to try a powerplay when there is a crisis.
Falks breaks their eye contact first. He huffs as he walks to the door and hisses “Do what he says. We need to serve our king.” And he leaves the room. The two cadets follow.
Ccino glances back at the twins and is happy to note both seem too distracted to have noticed the captain trying his silly powerplay. The twins are just staring at each other and seemingly lost in their own world.
Ccino nods as he rushes to the wall. He finds the servants pathway and sneaks a look inside. Okay! Perfect! A sewing kit! He grabs it and takes it back inside before ringing the bell and leaving a message that he needs cloths in the colours of deep purple, dark blue, cyan or black stat. He goes back inside and looks around.
Now. What can he use to fix this mess? He searches the room and pulls out any tools he can find. Ccino knows that his fellow servants and maids all stash items all around the castle. To use when in need without having to travel far.
He manages to pull one of the large sun banners down and starts sewing it into a more casual tunic dress fit before managing to find a brown belt  to help give it shape. He goes to Dream’s side and checks the cape and clothes he is wearing. Okay he can let Dream still wear the large cape as it will go well.
Ccino pushes the clothes into his arms “Here. I am sorry it is rushed work. This will fit better.”
Dream stares before glaring as his sockets fill with tears “No! This… this isn’t supposed to be like this!” Dream glares at Nightmare “How could you?!”
Oh no not again.
Nightmare looks at Dream and that slight edge is back again “I just… I needed… I just wanted…” Each time Nightmare tries to speak he seems to stop as soon as he hears his own voice. Shock obvious on his face.
Dream glares “I can’t believe you would betray me! I trusted you! I thought we were a team!”
Nightmare looks so sad “We are…”
Dream shakes his skull.
Which is when Sera walks in. Great. This day just went from bad to horrible. And that is impressive as Ccino had believed he would become a sex slave.
Sera glares at him “Why are you making orders and what is going on?!”
Ccino just takes the fabric she brought and gets to work sewing quickly. He can’t make it complex or too detailed but anything fitting will be better than Nightmare being crowned while naked “Prince Nightmare ate the apple. I am preparing him for his coronation as quickly as I can.”
Sera looks shocked before frowning “You should not be this involved! Step aside as I will do so instead.”
Ccino shoots her a look “And what role gives you this right?”
Sera glares “I am the head of the servants! Including you!”
Ccino can’t help but smile brightly as he answers “Actually. As you very often told me. I am not a part of the servants. I am one of the king’s loyals.” He smiles brightly as he enjoys the shock on her face “And as you often told me. I don’t belong in your group.”
She sputters and glares “You have some nerve! You are nothing but a toy! Something to throw aside when the king is done with you!”
Ccino nods “Of course. But that is the king’s decision.” He makes sure to smile pleasantly “And you wouldn’t go against the king’s will… would you?”
Sera is seething but nods “I wouldn’t.”
Ccino nods “Good. Now. The guests will be forced to wait a little longer. I am sure they would appreciate some extra refreshments and food.” This time he downright smirks as he shoots her a look “After all. Your performance will reflect on all of us.”
Sera is furious. Ccino knows why of course. She must not enjoy Ccino echoing her own words back at her.
Sera nods before leaving the room.
Ccino checks his hands and is happy to note he got the basics done. This will sadly have to do. He walks over to Nightmare “My lord? May I help you?”
Nightmare blinks slowly at him before nodding “Yes.” He remains still as Ccino puts the newly made shirt over his head and carefully moves the slits he made in place. The tendrils move easily through it and seem to brush against his side and Ccino shudders. The goop is cool and sticks slightly. Still. He moves  with purpose as he gets Nightmare into his new shirt. It is a bit too tight for the other and Nightmare frowns as he looks down at it. Ccino starts messing with the seams as he tries to gain a bit more room for Nightmare to move around in.
Ccino eventually needs to abandon that as he has to focus on the other parts. The cloak he made is easy in design and has a hood attached for Nightmare to use if needed. He quickly stitches in the familiar pattern of the moon phases at the button and around the neck before putting it over his shoulders.
Shit. The normal strings would just not be impressive enough.
Come on think. Think. Think.
Ccino sees a glimmer of gold and looks down. His jewellery!
Ccino quickly undoes the chain around his neck and clips each end on the cape. It works and gives it a nice shine. Mmh.
Ccino is quick to remove all his bracelets and other gold items as he moves around Nightmare. Putting some on the tendrils, which seem to really like wrapping around his arm or leaning against him. Ccino gives them gentle pats each time he needs to move or he removes them.
At the end his own clothes are much darker thanks to all the goop but Nightmare looks at least a little bit like a king. Ccino hopes that the distance from the others will be large enough that it isn’t obvious that this is a very bad patch job but he did what he could.
Ccino nods as he grabs a spare outfit for himself and quickly changes. No longer the very clear offering but at this point Ccino thinks the best thing to do is to get the whole day over with before trying to pull everything back together.
Ccino nods to the twins as he speaks “Okay! That is all I can do. If we take much longer they will become impatient and we don’t need them to be mad.” It is scary how easy it is for him to fall back into this role. How natural it always felt to speak to them as babysitter, caretaker and, he only dares to think it, older brother. Even with Nightmare now being a deity it still feels natural. It feels easy.
“We will go out to the throne room and the guards will open the doors. More people will watch as the priest crowns Nightmare. After that they will party but it is fine if you two retire for the night at that point.”
Dream glares “Nightmare shouldn’t be crowned! I should be!”
Ccino flinches as he looks between the twins. Making sure to keep his voice calm as he speaks “I know Dream. But I don’t think anyone will accept that. Not while the ritual and powers accepted Nightmare…” because that is what happened. Even if people seem to refuse to see it. According to all the rules known of the ritual. Nightmare completed each step. He has a new form and new power. He was accepted and ascended. Both to king and to be a god.
Ccino doesn’t know if there are private rules he doesn’t know but he wouldn’t even know who would know. So this is the situation they have at the moment.
Dream shakes his skull and slaps Ccino’s hand away. Yeah he figured. Ccino doesn’t take it personally. “It is wrong!” Dream glares at Nightmare.
Nightmare still has this glint in his sockets but each time he stares for too long at Dream, Ccino can see that Nightmare also focusses on him and the glint disappears.
Ccino focusses on Dream as he tries to calm the other down “I know you are angry Dream. But please. We don’t have time to discuss this and-”
Dream shakes his skull “I don’t care!” he glares at Nightmare “How could you!”
Nightmare’s tendrils slowly rise “I don’t…”
Dream doesn’t listen and his hand finds an old bust and he swings it right against Nightmare’s skull. A loud crack of stone and bones as the bust falls to pieces.
Silence before shock overtakes any emotion Ccino feels. Ccino rushes over as Nightmare slowly rises to his full height. His new tendrils sharpening and rising themselves.
Ccino gets to them and stands between them again “No! Both of you stop that. Dream! You know better than attacking your brother.” He shoots Dream a look.
Dream shakes as tears run down his angry face “He stole my future!”
Ccino shoots him a disapproving look “And you just hit him with a stone bust.” He sighs as turns towards the door to see it slightly open. Of course this guy is listening in. Whatever! Ccino speaks loudly “Cadet Rogers. Bring Dream to his room and stand guard. Make sure no one can bother the prince as the prince remains inside the room.”
Dream sputters “You can’t! You can’t do that!”
Ccino gives him a disapproving look “You are hurting. I know that. But you hurting is not an excuse to hurt others. You know your brother better than anyone and you should know that he would never hurt you unless he had a very good reason for it or had to. Instead of trying to communicate you attacked him. For this reason it is best to separate you two while we move on with the coronation.”
Dream shakes in rage as he looks down “I was supposed to be king.”
Ccino doesn’t feel good about this. But too much is counting on this. They can work on mending their relationship when Nightmare has the crown and people remain loyal. Than they can talk and relax. Cadet Rogers takes the prince away to his room and Ccino turns to Nightmare.
He only now realises that he had his back to Nightmare the whole time. That he had his back to someone who had his tendrils sharpened moments ago. But Nightmare looks calm and… he is leaning against the hand Ccino had held out to signal Nightmare to stay back. Ccino hadn’t even noticed as he tried to manage Dream.
Ccino checks his outfit once more before checking the skull. He can’t see anything. The goop is all liquid and hiding everything and Ccino isn’t sure if he can wipe it away safely “Nightmare? Does it hurt?” They are alone now. Ccino is too distraught to bother with titles unless he has to. Which he will have to in a few minutes.
Nightmare keeps staring at his hand “He… attacked me…”
Ccino frowns and nods “I know…  I am sorry…” he should have expected something like this. He should have made sure they were both safe. He just… he hadn’t thought… He should have considered this a possibility as Dream had been hurt by this.
Nightmare shakes slightly.
Ccino feels so bad for this “Nightmare. I know this is a lot but we can’t wait. People are waiting and have high expectations. You need to be crowned. Do you understand?”
Nightmare is quiet for a moment before nodding.
Ccino sighs “Good… good.” He makes sure to stand tall “Let’s get to work.” And he leads Nightmare out.
-----
Ccino is exhausted. The whole day had been exhausting and Ccino isn’t even sure if he can still recall everything that happened. Ccino just…
He just wants to sleep.
He rolls up in his bed. Now dressed in PJs as he tugs his blanket around. It is much too late for him. But he will need to be up early tomorrow to help Night- their king get ready for his first official day as king. Not to forget he needs to visit prince Dream and make sure he is okay.
Ccino is so tired and-
A knock on his door.
Ccino frowns. That is unusual. He walks towards his door and glances through the keyhole. He stares in shock before opening the door wide and bowing “My king. What do I own you this visit?”
His king stands there. A frown on his face “My… My mother’s room feels… wrong… I can’t sleep there. Dream hates me and does not wish to share his room. I wanted to sleep with you.” He still struggles with his sentences.
Ccino feels his soul freeze for a moment with the last part but he can see Nightmare means it literally. He doesn’t want to be alone.
Ccino isn’t sure why he can still read Nightmare just like he used to. You would think that Ccino lost that skill when Nightmare gained a new body. But even if the body is different. Even with his face being different. Ccino can still read him like he always does.
Ccino nods “Of course. Please come in.” he holds the door open and Nightmare walks in. He stands in the middle of the room seemingly lost.
Right. He doesn’t have any clothes in his new size. Ccino adds that to the mental to do list for tomorrow as well. Making sure their king has clothes that actually fit him. For now Ccino opens his drawer and searches it. He has a few oversized dress shirts and hopes it is big enough. He hands one over to Nightmare.
Nightmare looks at it before undressing and dressing in the clothing item. Ccino grabbed a spare pillow from the cabinet in the hall before throwing that on his bed as well.
It takes a moment but then they are both in Ccino’s bed. Nightmare gives a full body shudder and tugs his face and skull right by Ccino’s neck and shoulder.
Ccino has the strongest sense of déjà vu. Of when Nightmare was much smaller and he had night terrors. How Nightmare would use the servants tunnels to get to his room and climb into his bed at night. How they would make little blanket forts on days when everyone told Nightmare he wasn’t good enough. How Nightmare would climb into his bed when he was sad.
Nightmare… Nightmare may not look or feel or sound like the Nightmare Ccino knows. But it is still Nightmare. It is still his little Nighty.
Ccino hugs the large being closer “Sshh… it is okay… I am here.”
Nightmare shakes and shudders “Please… Please stay… I am so scared…”
Ccino tightens his hold on the other and holds him close “I am here Nighty. I swear on my soul.”
That seems to do it as Nightmare just holds unto him tightly. Tight enough that Ccino can feel his nails grip into his back. Ccino can feel those new tendrils circle him and hold him closely. Ccino just keeps holding unto Nightmare, keeps him in an embrace.
Eventually Nightmare falls asleep. Ccino can’t even find it in himself to care about the rumours this will cause. About the rumours that will follow after Nightmare leaves Ccino’s room.
Ccino doesn’t care. He will help and assist Nightmare. Everything will be alright.
#utmv#NewAgeAU#nightmare sans#dream sans#ccino sans#gifted drabble#writing#And we did it!#Important to note. that after a few weeks. once things are calm again.#that Ccino realises… that the thought to leave and escape in the confusion never even acquired#Even if he realises later on that that would ahve been the easiest moment to leave#or after when nightmare was still shakey in comment.#a lot of servants and maids left in this period.#And Nightmare fired even more.#I think that in the few weeks after nightmare was made king. After he banished dream.#There were VERY FEW people still working in the castle.#barely anyone. a skeleton crew if you will (I will leave for my bad joke)#As for what happened to captain falks?#Ngihtmare did not take kindly to this person coming to him and suggesting ccino should be whipped for taking comment for a while there.#spot. we never decided if nightmare did or did not kill people so what happened to these type of people is still a bit of a mystery#sera also was very quickly fired. she disresepcted ccino once when nightmare was near and she was banished.#I do imagine that for a while ccino was pretty much every ruling position in the name of nightmare. as he got himself together.#so yeah if ccino didn't trust you? you were out. banished. fired. everything.#ccino had so much power. He did nothing with it aside from trying to get everything ready for nightmare.#There is a reason. why these two trust each other.#and also why captain rogers respects ccino so much.#because he saw ALL of it. from the start.#This guy saw this servant rush to stop a fight between a newly made god and his brother. and succeed.#then managed to get everything back in order and going.#That sticks with you.
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reno11037 · 3 days ago
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In honor of Chapter 1 coming out for Project:Eden’s Garden I drew my fav boy Damon as well as share my theory (or my hypothesis/idea cause I’m not really basing this on a lot) on why I think Kai is going to die (not in chapter 1, probs dying as chapter 4 or 5 victim)
(Also if you couldn’t tell, the fanart is inspired by my idea about Kai’s death lol)
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First the fanart, I’m very proud of how this came out (let’s see how long that lasts lmao), took awhile to get the effect on the butterflies right
And now on why I think Kai is going to die
All the characters are associated with an animal, Damon a snake, Eva a crow, Wolfgang a sheep, etc, and Kai is a butterfly.
Butterflies often represent life, death and resurrection in Christian iconography, also being a symbol of hope and endurance but more often they represent rebirth, transformation and change. In official art we see Damon and Kai together a lot
Examples (sources are official Eden’s Garden Discord and Twitter):
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And what is Kai’s talent again, the ultimate influencer. My belief is that during the game Kai is going to influence Damon and is going to be a big part in his character growth, especially when he dies, Damon at first will be like “that’s sad but I don’t care” to “wait no I actually care a lot” really quickly, he’ll have to come to terms with he’s feelings towards Kai (wether that be romantic or platonic, my moneys on romantic cause in the valentines pic it says Damon got something from a secret admirer and there are butterflies around him, Kai’s signature animal)
I imagine Damon will be faced with a lot of grief and regret of how mean he was to Kai when he was alive (similar to Himiko and Tenko from DRV3) we’ll see Damon be at his lowest and potentially at his most vulnerable and just not understand why until either he or one of the other characters (probs Wolfgang) helps him realize his feelings, I Imagine some tears would be shed from Damon
TLDR: I think Kai and his death are basically gonna be used for Damon’s character development lol
But that’s just my thoughts, if anyone has anything they’d like to add to this I’d love to see it
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shellem15 · 3 days ago
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Anyways I'm still not over my devil boys. Thinking about all the parallels between them:
Because like, the road to Hell is paved with good intentions, right? Draws in and punishes people for trying to be good, trying to *help* those they care about. And whether they succeed or not is irrelevant because in the end they're damned either way. That's the lie, then, that their sacrifice would ever actually change their fate.
And its just: HELL IS LIKE THAT BECAUSE IT’S A REFLECTION OF ITS LORD AND THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED TO *HIM*. THAT’S WHAT MADE HIM REAL IN THE FIRST PLACE AND NOW HES STUCK LIKE IT FOREVER!!!
That's what happened to Asmodeus and then he did it to Vespin Chloras and Zerxus and then Zerxus tried to do it with Pike too (in tlovm). It's a never-ending cycle where the one who's burned then becomes the fire for the next person!!! UGHHH
And it all starts with that one act of good intent, that act of sacrifice! Imri throwing himself to the flames, knowing he would burn, to protect his family at the cost of himself. Luz saving him but in the end he chooses to burn anyways, this time out of hate. Zerxus selling his soul to save his son and his world, knowing that damnation would be the end result. Nydas giving him an out, killing him before dawn struck but Zerxus stubbornly, hubristically clinging to life, to his ideals and pride, anyways. Choosing to burn and losing himself entirely in the process.
(Ironically enough Vespin kind of breaks the cycle? Trying to replace a god to remove a great evil from the world and instead damning it in the process. But when given his mind back he takes this chance and stretches it as far as he can, choosing not to be the fire but to give his world a chance at survival. Doing it knowing he will be hated anyways. Learning from his mistake, humbled at the consequences of his hubris where Asmodeus and Zerxus grew proud. Burning for it anyways. I get the sense that if he was given an out he would take it, unlike the other two.)
Love becomes sacrifice becomes resentment becomes hatred. Hatred towards those they sacrificed for because why did it have to be them who burned? Why do they get to be whole while I am broken? How dare they get to have light and love and happiness while I burn in the dark. Why didn't they burn with me? If they really loved me they would burn too!
Hatred towards those who seek to help them, because how dare you pity me. I chose this, I chose to burn! I knew the costs! How dare you spit in the face of my sacrifice! Did it truly mean so little to you that you would wipe away all trace of it!? Trying to heal me, trying to fix me, trying to redeem me, I did this for you! I didn't do anything wrong!
Hatred towards their corrupter, towards their damnation because everything was fine before they came along. Before they ruined everything! It's their fault for breaking it and now I'm going to make them pay for it! It doesn't matter who I hurt because nothing else matters except making sure they regret ever touching me.
Hatred towards themselves because how could someone be so stupid as to try? Love is weakness and sacrifice is for fools and those who throw themselves to the pyre deserve to burn. I'll prove it, to anyone who thinks themselves good and noble and true. Come find out.
And how could they not become resentful, to not have their love turn to hate? It's one thing to choose to burn and another to burn *forever*. A martyr is not supposed to live through the martyrdom, they're supposed to die. Their sacrifice is meant to have an end. They never got to have an end. (Though I will say, its very interesting that Zerxus chose not to die while Asmodeus seemingly *didn't*. He was dying, and the Everlight healed him. Gave him life but took peace with her.)
And the horns too! The symbol of their damnation, of corruption. But they didn’t get it that way, the horns were protection first, before anything. A testament to their love and sacrifice scarred into their flesh, on display for all to see. But that love born of protection is forgotten, both by others and themselves. Twisted into something rotten.
(No wonder Asmodeus is so good at manipulating good. He knows how good people think because that's how he thought, once. He could be so good at being good.)
They're burning. Always. They hate the fire but also, also-- they want to burn. They choose it every time because the alternative is to sacrifice the one thing they cannot, will not--their pride. They would have to be honest to do that, wouldn't they? Honest about the hurt they've caused, honest about how broken they've become. That they do not deserve their fate (that no one does), that while they were burned once they do not need to burn forever. There is always a choice. They'd have to be honest to change and they never will because the Devil sometimes tells the truth he is never honest. He can't be. He won't let himself.
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mychlapci · 3 days ago
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horny idea I got while toy collecting bumblebee/cliffjumper retool and recolors are extremely common in g1 and in animated their are a ton of bumblebee like mini bots so what if horned minis type are kinda like the rabbits of the cybertronian very horny little fuck that are extremely insticts driven when it comes to reprodection, and taking care of their young, they have big litters usally between 5 or 8 sparklings, they can get sparked Extermly easily and can be sparked by any type of bot but the resulting litter will always be more mini bots though they do take on some the traits of their sires cliffjumper experience these strong breeding instincts but is too prideful to give in constantly insisting how he's not like others horned minis not letting any bot spike him, eventually he does agree to interface with another bot (i'm thinking Mirage) maybe what has cliff so riled up and short tempered is the fact he is ignoring these inbuilt insists and calm down a lot when he starts following his actual programming instead of fighting it, turns out he likes getting spiked and stuffed full of transfluid and sparklings fell like he still be feisty though when it came to defending his sparkling or his mate (cliffjumper does not share his mate) cliffjumper pretends he doesn't love being a carrier that once the cybertronian population crisis is over and their a stable cybertronian population he'll stop, but internally he knows he can't give this up bumblebee is a younger than cliffjumper so those kinda insists to effect him but slowly start gaining these instincts as he gets older maybe he gets spiked for the first time and it send his instincts into overdrive after he interfaced for the first time he immediately has to do it again and again and again until his forge is completely full and even after that he tried to fill himself up past his limit unlike cliffjumper bumblebee doesn't have a set mate and doesn't seem like he wants one either he just likes getting filled by any bot in the base all his litters have multiple sires and even before the sparkling start developing he always looks a few months in because he so stuff full of transfluid bumblebee really gets in being a good carrier and if at any point his forge is even close to half empty he make sure it's full again their Initially a little bit embarrassment for him maybe even a little shame about his bulging frame and Insatiable craving for trans fluid but overtime he started using those both as a badge of honor ant maybe even something he was proud of he went from a good autobots scout to the autobots top carrier able to carry massive litters of 8 to 12 bots back to back, often his forge is to stuff for him to move properly but thats ok other bots help take care of him and his sparklings 🦄
lowkey obsessed with the structure of this ask. really gives off the vibe that you’re frantically writing this down before your phone dies and strands you in a cave. anyways Yes yes yes, all for horny g1 minibots. Cliffjumper thinks he’s sooo much stronger than his breeding instincts, but he was bound to lose in the end. and i loooove sex pest Bumblebee.
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heavenmercy · 1 year ago
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Oh, the humanity. Please, pity me.
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bluegiragi · 2 years ago
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konig is very good for ghost and soap in the soapbox saga finale <3
read the full comic (29 pages) on patreon!
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demi-pixellated · 1 year ago
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🌻Blade Breaker II & The Rose Noble🌹 - Power Couple of New Fodlan -
I am SO EXCITED to show my full piece for Sunflower, A Leonie zine. What a beautiful book, with all it’s fantastic merch, and I’m so glad I got to be apart of it and show my fav cavalry girl all the love she deserves!! Thank you to everyone who supported the zine, but if you missed out the first time around, don’t sweat it! Sunflower is now having it’s leftover sale!! 🌻 Pick Up A Copy Here 🌻
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hellpuppy666 · 2 years ago
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POV your friend invites you over to play bloodborne (full version here)
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luck-of-the-drawings · 1 year ago
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WWWOOOPS FORGOT I MADE THIS. drew this back at around when the hyperbolic time chamber training arc was just starting. remember that? huh? remember the hamspter??? ohhhhhhhh youll remember the haspter!!!! oh my god yknow what else i remember. williams overwhelming love for christmas. oh my god. spooky zombie boy loves the christmas.. literally the best possible thing for him...
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi pd spoilers#VYNCENT SSOOOOOLLLL I STILL DONT KNOW HOW TO DRAW YOUUUUU AND YKNIOW WHY?? YKNOW WHYYY???? BC WHEN I FIRST DREW EVERYONE:#I DIDNT LOOK AT ANY REFS. DREW EM STRAIGHT FROM OFF THE TOP O MY HEAD. AND WELL. IN MY HEAD SOMETIMES#I PICTURE THE CHARACTERS LOOKING SIMILAR TO THE PLAYERS IN SOME WAY. NOT THE BEST THING TO DO REALLY. BUT YOU SEE.#VYNCENT CAME OFF AS A VERY SOFT AND SWEET CHARACTER. BUT SEEMED TO CARRY ALOT OF STRENGTH. HES LIKE A BEAUTIFUL AND POWERFUL BULL TO ME.#SO I DRAW THE GUY REAL DENSE! BUT THEN YAKNOOOWW THE OFFICIAL ART CROSSES MY EYES N IM LIKE FFFYUUUUUCKKK HE DOESNT LOOK LIKE THAT!!!!!!#IM LIKE AAUGUHGH IM DRAWIN HIM WRONG!!! BUT THEN IM ALSO CRAAAZY STUBBORN N I AAALREADY ESTABLISHED THIS DESIGN FOR HIM AND I DONT WANNT#I DONT WANNA GO N JUS CHANGE IT AAAALL UP NOW!!CMAHHHNNN BUT I STILL GOTTA DO SOOOMETHIN!!#LEST HE BECOMES SO FAR REMOVED FROM THE SOURCE MATERIAL HE FAILS TO BE RECOGNIZED!! ANYONE ELSE GO THRU THIS? GIMME UR TIPS#anyway AHH THE DEMON THAT DESPISES ART FROM MONTHS AGO!! just means im improving so so fastly and cool-like. tbh im so proud o my recents#bUT HEY THOUGH I FIGURED OUT THE QUEUEUE THING AHAHAH NOW I CAN GET ALL MY THOUGHTS N DRAWINS OUT IN A DAAAYYYY#CONSISTENT POSTING FOR A MONTH HERE I COME. DAILY UPLOADS FOR A WEEK. YEAAHH BABY!!! PREPARE FOR SHOTGGUN BLASDT!!!!!!#ALRIGHT ALright one more thing before i go im. SO IN LOVE WITH MY SHAPES HONESLY... they are not just one shape but so so many put together#fucked up innit??? im seeing soo many problems in this piece though but i rest easy knowing i captured my feelings in the moment.
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coconut530 · 5 months ago
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🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️Pride, 2024🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈
Lesbian flag colors taken from the flag made by Emily Gwen
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rhys-ravenfeather · 2 years ago
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Listen, sometimes in life you’ve just gotta ignore canon, and even certain headcanons/AUs you don’t like or agree with and come up with your own/a version of the thing you like. As a form of self-care. This is a moral I live by, I think anyone who knows me knows at this point.
But for all that is good and decent in the world, you still absolutely need to be respectful towards others, even if what they made does not gel with you, personally. Especially if they’re the original creator(s) of the original, canon work.
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turnupswritessometimes · 5 months ago
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Hi, can I ask your top favorite fics that you've written (feel free how much that you want to list)? Why they're special to you? Is there a specific inspiration when you wrote them?
Oh, it's Hanging Tough. It honestly feels like I peaked with it.
I just feel like it has a really nice flow. I love how Ash and Eiji's conversations came out. I love how it captures the 80s New York summer. I love how they are with each other.
I had absolutely no plan for it. It was just oneshots that kept joining together into something more. I love this moment:
"I never want you to act with me, Eiji." His voice was quiet.
"Really?" Eiji's lips quirked upwards. "So, I can hold your hand in front of Bones and Kong?"
"Is that all you want to do? Hold my hand?"
Eiji laughed, his fingers twitching in Ash's. "Maybe. What would you want to do?"
He stubbed out the rest of the cigarette on the balcony and let out the last breath of smoke.
"You don't want to know."
But that only made Eiji laugh again. "I just asked, didn't I?"
Ash gave him a sideways glance. He was smiling with slightly pink cheeks and sparkling eyes.
"It's too early for this."
"Let's go inside," Eiji said.
So, they did. And left the balcony doors open, putting on a pot of coffee then coming back to sit on the sofa with mugs filled to the brim.
A fun behind the scenes tidbit is that I started writing some of the earlier oneshots whilst I was at work. Only the only thing I could write with whilst on the floor was quill and ink, and as I wore regency dress, I didn't have pockets. Cue me stuffing pages of queer fanfiction down the front of my dress for safekeeping. Truly living the Austen heroine dream!
I also come back to We Don't Need Another Hero a lot - I enjoyed writing a young Ash. I really enjoyed giving young Ash a home; and really exploring that. Ash and Max's relationship is so special to me (as is probably evident in my other Banana Fish works). I actually have even more scenes for that one that I haven't uploaded.
I could probably fill the whole list with Banana Fish, lol - Bed of Roses I'm very proud of (inspired by Young Guns) too!
I also really loved Worth Running To. It's such a love letter to the first Kingdom Hearts game for me. I really loved the piracy hijinks, and weaving in the other characters and the story. I loved both Riku and Sora's backstories in it. It was really fun to have overarching story threads through the whole fic - Namine, but also the medallion. The Montague sibling books were definitely a big inspiration, but I was also surrounded by regency history at the time. I've considered making it into it's own novel many times, but it's just too entrenched in Kingdom Hearts, and I think that makes it very special.
I also loved their first kiss. I was so eager to write it:
“Riku!” He tried to fight his way forward, even as he was dragged away.
Riku started onward, panic in his eyes. “Sora!”
He dug his heels into the deck. He could only see those sea coloured eyes and he knew that he had to keep them in sight. No matter what.
But the men were stronger, and he stumbled.
Just as men grabbed hold of Riku, trying to tug his arms back.
But he had closed the gap. His mouth smashed into Sora’s.
For a moment, that was the whole world. The whole world was Riku’s lips on his and there was supernova exploding in his chest.
He was kissing Riku. Riku was kissing him.
Then he remembered the hands pulling him away. They were yanked apart and someone was yelling. People were yelling, but Sora couldn’t hear them. His out breath was a sigh.
The only thing he could see were those eyes.
And his lips were still tingling.
I also loved writing Roxas' story in the same universe, but it wasn't as big a hit on Ao3. (Very much inspired by Byron's schooldays, though.)
I also have a soft spot for Confession; I like exploring religion and it's been really cool to see it hit home with others, and I was very proud of An Impression in Bread Dough; it came out very poetic.
I feel like that's the main ones that I would say are my very favourites. I've loved writing all my fics, I think, but these are the ones I often come back to re-read and am proud of.
Generally, with my oneshots, I'm inspired by little moments or throwaway lines that mean something more. (My Fruits Basket fics usually come from there.) My Banana Fish fics are certainly inspired by watching movies with my dad, and me inserting Ash and Eiji into them. (He doesn't know this!)
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phagodyke · 5 months ago
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4 hours of gay climbing club crops watered mana restored I fucking love. boulder 🪨
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