#i love learning about my mutuals
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hi Emma! Who do you consider your friends do you have a crush on anybody?
" For crushes... "
#ITS SO SO FUNNY HOW MUCH PAIRINGS FIT MELLY? i felt like i needed to draw her as the greed talked about in the bible#AND MELLY POTENTIALLY KNOWING WENDY FOOTE BEFORE THE MANOR? omg... im so excited to see their lore#2022 me would be so sad emmamelly is not bros otp no more#NOT THAT EMMAMELLY IS BAD AND GONE heh.#swaytura on the mind though u feel#idv#identity v#emma woods#identity v gardener#survivor ask blog#idv gardener#ask emma woods#identity v ask blog#mentions:#melly plinius#wendy foote#give her like 20 seconds before she crushes again trust#a moment to talk about ships:#I dont got a defined crush/relationship for Emma! I love all her ships ^^ it's so silly to see other peoples portrayals and hcs#I started off shipping Emma and Melly because of garden scenarios and how they'd share a mutual bond through their nature expertise#Tracy and Emma are one of my OG ships too! super cute! From gears to plants they both have their own parallels to learn from eachother#when I first started this blog I used to talk to this Mun and they started sending me Emma and Naib artworks!#my goodness their excitement was contagious ^^! I hope theyre doing alright.#To that one Kurt/Servais and Emma shipper I see you! the pairings are super calming and I think itd be interesting to explore their past!#Someone posted Lucky x Emma here too and heh.. I totally get you. theyd get into such shenanigans together and they seem sweet!#Then I've been seeing alot of Norton and Emma recently on tiktok! Theres this one artist that draws them in such silly scenarios#But everytime I think about shipping them I get flashbacks to a minecraft server with nortnaib and i feel like damn... betrayal </3#how could i do that to my nortnaib besties#Then when playing with my friend on IDV I noticed they had Mary and Emma room pictures and yknow what? go queen#hcs are very much appreciated :) maybe when i open asks again i'd love to hear everyones thoughts.
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I’m obsessed with them already
#sram#sramhr#SKAM Croatia#dare I say most attractive noorhelm yet#nora klaric selem#roko maric#Nora x Roko#Now I must explain the song choice#first of all thinking bout you is my favourite song EVER#but I always thought that particular verse was no noorhelm coded#they’re technically not each other’s first times because they both have had experience#as far as I know sram will have that remain the same#unless they change it ?#but I always thought the concept of a first time extends beyond physical intimacy#rather - the first time you’re in love#so in that sense I see this as first *true* love#not infatuation#but pure genuine and deep love#a new feel!!#because it’s literally right out of their respective comfort zones#no cause let’s talk about how they have a mutual fear of love and vulnerability#for different though similar reasons (lack of familial love)#which results in them being quite reserved / introverted people#but their independence/self preservational personalities become a sort of security blanket#because they’re so used to moving through life depending on themselves#until they learn to open their hearts and let love in#and it’s diffcult and messy at times#but it’s worth it#god they really are so poetic when you sit and ponder on it
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y'all go from being feminists to tearing these women down within seconds oh my god it's 2024 can we please stop viciously tearing one woman down to bring another up i don't care what side you take but saying vile shit about either woman and their music is disgusting, please grow up
#seperate the art from the artist please oh my god#for the record i like both billie and taylor#the variants being a major thing but i know thats not to hurt billie like yall say its it's to get more money (which she doesn't need????)#like let people have opinions oh my god its not that deep#and some of yall (not naming names yk who you are) went from loving billies new album to saying the most vile shit within a second which is#+shallow as fuck please learn to separate the art from the artist#you're allowed to dislike someones music but dragging them down as a person is shameful and not something to be proud of#and some of the shit ive seen said recently is disgusting please think before you speak#and ill be honest the swifties are saying most of the horrible stuff#i love taylor as much as you guys but it is not an excuse to say disgusting shit about other women please find something better to do+#+with your time#most of my mutuals are swifties but tbh if youre offended by me saying not to drag women down then i don't want you following me anyways#luc posts#billie eilish#taylor swift#i will not rant about my hatred for the variants and consumerism thats a post for another day#also have yall considered that this whole argument thing is pr so they can both get more streams. bc uh that was my first thought ngl#edit like 10 minutes later: i read an article and yall are blowing shit out of proportion it is literally not that deep omg
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i miss carpisuns sometimes </3
#not necessarily that I regret switching over but i just get like nostalgic for an earlier time in the ml fandom#s3 was soooo much fun for me#and the long hiatus before s4 was also the best. so good wasn’t ready for it to end when it did haha#things just feel so different in the fandom now#both the fandom has changed and I have changed#and of course the STORY has changed#and I like don’t know what to do about that or how to react#cause I am used to being one of the guys who is defending ml’s honor with my life lol#committed to spreading positivity#and I still want to be that guy!#but it’s like. idk. I don’t recognize this story anymore#this isn’t the same story that I fell in love with years ago. but I don’t want to just like Leave??#I do want to see how things play out bc I am still invested in these characters#and I would love to still be part of the fan community and connect with people over a mutual love for this thing#that has been important to me for years and has inspired me to create and learn new skills and make new friends!#but I also don’t just want to shut up and pretend I’m happy about things I am decidedly unhappy about lol#like it’s honestly surprising to me that a only a small minority of the fandom seems to feel the way I do?#and the majority are still super pumped and frustrated at the people who are complaining#and really. I don’t WANT to rain on anyone’s parade. I honestly don’t#I was part of the parade for years! I had the best time in the parade! I don’t want to ruin the good time!#so i try not to be too salty on main ? but i feel like I’m going a little crazy lmao! like I’m just one bitter little miser fhdjjd#i mean i guess it’s kind of a good thing that I moved blogs tbh lol#cause now when i whine only a fraction of the people have to be exposed to it 😂#but man i hate knowing that people might think of me as a salter#I mean it’s valid if people are trying to have fun and do not want to hear my complaining haha#but also do i automatically have to be a salter. are the only options support and defend ml 100% at all times or Be A Salter#or can there be a third category of certified ml lover that is just disappointed in recent events & disagrees with the new writing direction#is that too much nuance for tumblr lol#see maybe that’s why I miss carpisuns. she didn’t have to ask this question. she was only full of LOVE!#but therein lies the irony…like marinette I have made this choice out of love…for what the story once was…what is to become of me now…
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something something i just want a humble, murderously simple thing: that mork would've been allowed to heal on screen and get through his trauma with loving people by his side or however that quote goes idk
#i said i wouldn't give my two cents but there they are#am not gonna touch the disaster topics but this one feels personal#i thought this was a journey about mutual growth and healing#between two ppl who learn to love each other unconditionally#last twilight
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If I see one more "poor Izzy was in an abusive relationship for twenty years :'(" take I'm going to set this pirate ship on fire.
#you don't get to erase the gorgeous fucked up mutual toxicity of their consent-free sadomasochist trauma survival relationship on MY watch#they SAVED EACH OTHER and MADE EACH OTHER and FUCKED EACH OTHER UP and it was so so bad it was sooooo gooooooooood#like i know disk horse has trained us to think there can only be The Abuser and The Abused and one is always bad and one is always blameless#but babies sometimes relationships are fucked up and when it's fictional it can be so gorgeous like come on#izzy got so hard when fed his toe I'm surprised he didn't have an aneurysm and die right then#if you're gonna claim him as queer then let him be QUEER not an uwu sanitized self insert okay?#he was fine with losing his toe he wasn't fine with losing his playmate#and blackbeard came back WRONG#this thing the two of them created this fucked up dangerous pirate game called blackbeard wasn't about belonging anymore#it wasn't about the two of them surviving the cruelty of their former captain or the worse cruelty of civilized society#it was a caricature and it had to die#and it did in the end#and Izzy realized he didn't need it anymore#and Ed didn't need it#and he was so so happy about it#that was worth dying for#ugh I'm so in love with this story#anyway Izzy wasn't abused & he was abused & he was an abuser & he saved Edward & they were so bad for each other & they loved each other#learn to love complicated fucked up harmful problematic things babies#because you are one#and you deserve love too
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demyx is a grilled cheese sim among knowledge sims (or whatever the others would be majority of)
REAL!!!!!
truly in my brain demyx doesnt have A Whole Deal Going On. hes just a dumb bitch. hes dumb and lazy because its funny
#xemnas has the get together aspiration abt having a cool club#xigbar has the one from for rent about learning everybodys secrets [also obvs has the Nosy trait]#xaldin is. im very sorry i have mutuals who love him and i love him too but there is just not enough there to decide his aspiration#vexen has one of the knowledge ones#lexaeus same deal as xaldin#zexion also has a knowledge one#saix also has the club aspiration? or maybe one of the werewolf ones. tee hee#there is a ''deviant'' aspiration that has a goal to watch an enemy die. axel has that one#demyx is grilled cheese. and/or one of the music ones but thats boring#luxord . there isnt a board games aspiration. they should add one. for him. for me#marluxia s.same deal as xaldin and lexaeus. do they have a dead sister aspiration. thats the only thing that makes him intersting. sorry#larxene has one of the aspirations about being mean. fuck i love larxene. smiling big and wide#roxas and xion's stories are so centralized in the world and themes of kh that its hard to come up with sims aspirations for them.#they wanna be in a band. thats my truth. they wanna start a band together.#kh#asks
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Me, thinking of doing my capstone this spring semester about the Iraq war and how it is so unequivocally obvious that the US were the bad guys the whole time and how much money is being spent till this day trying to cover that up only to go on instagram and see a major movie coming out next year from an American soldier POV of his time in Iraq with a bunch of BIG name celebrities involved whose audience is largely made up of those who were not alive/conscious in the Iraq war or do not have Iraqi relatives and are going in with a blank mindset liking one of the actors and can easily be convinced they were hero’s:
If anyone wants to see my presentation I did as a final on the Abu Ghraib prison, in which US soldiers committed horrific human rights abuses, including but not limited to torture, rape, and mass murder with the few of the hundreds of thousands of soldiers who participated only being sentenced to months in prison, lmk.
#it makes me so angry that I wouldn’t be angry at all about this if I didn’t spend $150k on a history degree to learn this#extremely white American moment I know it’s a privilege to just be learning about this#it just makes me AHHHH#and fucking people are like oh no kit Connor whyyyy#my hands are shaking typing that#I love you my middle eastern mutuals whose suffering at our hands is somehow twisted into making us victims while also aestheticizing it#it’s just#JSJSJSHHS#rae’s rambles
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[Start ID. A drawing of @mieczmaszyna 's character Izzy. In the words of its creator, Izzy is a humanoid robot with a white chassis, oval head, black headset, square green glasses, claws, and a tail resembling a cable plug. Ai wears a cowboy hat, vest decorated by a star and bottle cap, pants with tassels, spurred boots, and a red bandanna. He's viewed from the side, kicking up one leg and holding both arms out in front of itself to shoot finger guns, looking excited and rather jaunty. The background is a dull yellow-green, muddied by the warm reddish tone of the drawing, and in paler green are the words "BANG BANG!!" by ais arms. End ID]
robot cowboy!!!
#peridots-art#bots#others' ocs#izzy#mieczmaszyna#gotta admit doing all the shading here was. very fun. insert medic hoo noise#i don't know if people usually read these but @ the intended recipient of this post! if you are!!#i remember first liking your art a year ago (actually only about a week off now lol) when it crossed my dash for the first (/only) time#and then found it again whilst enjoying the funky robot dudes (yesm/p03) and their respective games and I fell in Love with your style#i also was always enthused by the number of my fixations that you also liked! fnv! insc! ultkll! tf2 and hylics which i've never played!#and then there's hk which has been my most prominent special interest for close to two years so. safe to say that was. AWESOME to see#ALSO ALSO!! i think we may be like. mutuals-in-law*2??#by which i mean one of my two closest friends on this site (holly) is mutuals with a cool artist (sodapop)#who i learned by accident that you've sent asks to before. either way it's cool :]#reserving the caption 'robot cowboys my beloved' for the future cause there are too many! victor and p03 and my own guy atoya and now this?#it is a wonderful problem. anyway i'm also looking at P3RI and realizing how many traits they and izzy share by accident lol#think. that should be all the tags (see: incoherent rambling). really like your stuff and have been meaning to draw something for you for#a while just got nervous 👍#peridots-described
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What it's like being a narcissist in a group chat with other narcissists
#npd#narcissist#for people without npd who wouldn't get this and think it's just needlessly judgy: it's not#connecting with other people with cluster b disorders is great. it can feel like home to have other people that actually understand#however. narcissists interacting can be like holding up a mirror and it can be VERY annoying#and not even like. in a bad way. npd servers force you to learn to deal with that shit in a healthy way#pissed off because someone else is seeking attention and youre the only one who deserves praise?#well if you be rude to them because of it people aren't going to return the favour for you when you start wanting praise#narcissists love having traits that they hate to see in anyone else. and being around other narcissists helps force people to cope w that#so like. i love pwnpd. sometimes i see a post by someone with it and am like wow....just like me#other times im like 'wow thats extremely toxic/dumb/immature/attention seeking. im so much better than you' even if its also something i do#or if its something similar to what i do but not exact#im trying to explain it the best i can without rambling forever in the tags but basically: this is not hostility#this is simply a hilarious ‚ ironic consequence of having npd#and i post this with so much love in my heart#as a narcissist i think narcissists are a bit too full of themselves and i know they feel the same way about me <3 mutual respect
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which ocs in the fandom do you find the most interesting? also, which ocs do you think have the most aesthetically pleasing designs? finally, which ocs have you only heard of but would like to know more about?
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh nooooooo ha haaa noooo i can't possibly answer this because it would be soooo unfair to have favourites wouldn't it's comet knight by @kittenvirus
#sorry it's the colour scheme and the glitter and the fluff. i'm unfortunately so so weak to all these things 😭#even a little bit of pastel rainbow star theming specifically... comet really has everything i'm sorry to say#i think starstruck would faint immediately if she saw him. could they be friends?? i'm not sure i think she'd just be like this: 👁️👁️#he is also one of (if not the very) first designs i saw when i started picking around the kirby community#so i'll always have a soft spot for him no matter who else i discover.#there are also a dozen other OCs that i love and adore but the more that i list the more folks will feel that i didn't list *them*#and i really really don't want to do that! my mutuals have some absolutely banging designs as do some folks who i don't follow!#there are also a lot of REALLY cool designs that are 'semi' oc but are more like redesigns? from folks AUs or comics or so on#many great morpho-esque redesigns out there too i'm always a fan of those!!!#please understand i'm listing only ONE design that hits all these prompts (bc i also don't know the creator well hence 'only heard of')#and one that always stands out to me personally because of the sentimentality i mentioned above#but i love MANY many many. if i started listing them i would never stop!! if you have an oc or a design i probably love them!!#i realise that is a bit of a dodge of the breadth of this question but i just... yknow? haha#i'd be happy to learn more about any ocs really!! i would actually love for starstruck to start having some relationships with others too?#if folks are interested in that!! she has relationships with the dream land four but not so much with ocs; and that might be fun too!!#others ocs#asks
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ngl I think I might change gabriel to my canon warden 🧍♀️
#i love nalah with my whole heart but she never wanted to be a warden and i do believe she’d hit da bricks#while gabriel would also get conscripted but sticks out his duty. right down to the ritual. and not following into the eluvian#(ngl i think a convo with nathaniel in awakening where he finds out gabriel was also conscripted would be fun to explore)#(also if he learns that gabriel planned to take back his mom’s ship in amaranthine and raze the howes to ash on the waking sea)#(moments when you realize you’re bonded in mutual trauma and vengeance by each other’s blood and accidentally became friends)#anyway. and instead of vanishing he’d join the inquisition not only to stay by leliana but use resources for the cure search#(and replaces c*llen as commander lol)#(also comical to me the hoops blackwall would be doing to dodge close examination of his warden-ness)#then all the guilt around duty and how he feels about family vs his perceived neglect of kieran by being absent his life#because gabriel sees kieran as his son but doesn’t think he’s earned the right to *be* his father#he chose the wardens over him - he chose not to follow morrigan#but then kieran is there. and well.#as y’all can see i’m rotating so many thoughts around him the more i play DAI lmao#dani plays dragon age#game: dragon age#oc: gabriel cousland
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get to know me tag
tagged by @averythepirate thank you <33
do you make your bed?
not as a habit, but i have been doing it more recently
what is your job?
unemployed/student gang
if you could go back to school would you?
probably not. I dropped out of art restoration due to burn out, and then I randomly went into horticulture and it's been such a horrible experience that I don't have it in me to go for another round, especially not with untreated adhd lmao
can you parallel park?
in theory yes, but I actually haven't done it since my driving lessons which was more than 5 years ago
a job you had that would surprise people?
I had a student job at an archeological dig site for exactly one day. we were excavating a graveyard under old church foundations. very interesting but it was in the middle of a heatwave and so hard on my body at the time that I quit after my first day, whoops
do you think aliens are real?
regarding how big the universe is, thinking that we're the only life form in it would be kinda crazy, so yeah
can you drive a manual car?
yeah it's the norm here, I drive a 2002 toyota corolla named after george harrison. beige interior, lovely brown dashboard, he's an old man but I am insanely attached to him <3
what is your guilty pleasure?
I don't feel guilty about any of my pleasures! I guess the closest would come safiya nygaard's videos since they're very consumerist and verging on the side of the internet I don't like to hang around, but they're very entertaining & I still don't really feel guilty about them
tattoos?
so far only 2 flying ducks on my arm that I got matching with my friend when travelling in budapest! i want many more tho, planning to get a nick drake one soon
do you like puzzles?
yeah! as long as they aren't like insanely frustrating. recently played a puzzle game called the last campfire which I really liked
any phobias?
not really
favorite childhood sport?
growing up as a fat kid not many, but I did really like badminton and trained it for two years
first thing you wanted to be growing up?
an illustrator
do you talk to yourself?
not that often but yeah for sure
what movies do you adore?
my top 5 are a new leaf, butch cassidy and the sundance kid, true stories, local hero and perfect days. all comfort movies too
honorable mentions: big eden, the assassination of jesse james by the coward robert ford, the american friend, mikey and nicky, castaway on the moon
coffee or tea?
I like both but I prefer tea
favorite color?
these :)
tagging: @acrosstherachelverse, @ssontag, @inrainbowscd, @lovemug, @thedivinemagnet no pressure ofc
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im ngl i think my favorite headspace to be in is "want to be annoying"
#i am also really low energy today so i cant really do my normal expressions of it#(spam messaging Everyone i want to talk to at any given moments notice; sending random pictures/asks/etc to ppl)#but i also like. love being annoying. idc how others feel about it. there's something so wonderful to me about being such a nuisance to ppl#u like that they roll their eyes when you post your random thoughts AGAIN#there's something so lovely about pushing peoples buttons (within reason)#there's something just so fun about being ANNOYING!!!!!#ugh#i think it may genuinely be impossible for anyone to make me hate myself with mean words now#i think about it a lot and ppl can be really mean and it'd make me sad ofc if people were mean to me#butalso like#every person who is mean to me for silly reasons or bc they wanna take me in bad faith; every hateful thing thats been said to me - its all#jokes. my screen name on discord in a couple different servers is nicknames over stuff thats ACTUALLY been said to me#i think weirdly fondly of the man who yelled out to me on my birthday last year “fat bitch” fromhis car not bc he's a good man (fuck him)#but bc yeah that hurt my feelings alittlein the moment - and then after i was like wait why? i AM a fat bitch! its one of my favorite thing#and every time soemone hates something abt me i just kinda learn to love it out of spite#anyway all of this is 2 sy: mutuals if u read this im holdin my finger 2cm frm your cheek going “IM NOT TOUCHING U” & giggling abt it c:
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i drive myself absolutely bananas, because the writing i'm most proud of? that i love even more than anything i've done for star wars (except maybe dha kar'ta) or any other fandom i've posted for in the decade and a half i've been writing? that i want to share more than anything? unfinished witcher fics. over 80,000 words spread over a few stories, not including the thousands of words of the quick notes/ideas i have for even more stories and i love them so much. but if i post them before they're finished i'm never gonna finish them, or at least that's what it feels like. i haven't worked on any of them in months, but have put dozens and dozens of hours into plotting and timeline-ing and researching. i want to share them and brag about them and collaborate on them, but also like. i'm definitely a star wars blogger. i follow like three witcher blogs and none of them are active anymore, and i don't particularly want to make a witcher blog. and the unfinished stories on my ao3 already give me so much anxiety
but it also just leaves me sittin here on my own vibrating out of my skin with no outlet
#delete later#cj rambles#i dunno y'all just#mutuals and long time followers know how much i love obi wan kenobi#now imagine i loved jaskier indescribably MORE than that#and i've made so many revisions of the beginnings n such when i've added or changed the lore or learned new things#so like ive also really fallen in love with making a work complete before posting so i don't have to retcon or just settle for old ideas#does that make sense?#but fuck i love these works of mine so much and sharing has been an intrinsic part of my writing and storytelling for so long that it's har#to keep it all to myself#but i have no fandom friends#blehh just really feelings the like toddler-level overhwelm of emotions about how much i love what i do and how i do it#but also hating how i do it
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If your life circumstances have always required from you an abnormal amount of strength and resilience, I see you. If your inner child lets out a small sob anytime someone compliments you on that strength, I see you. If that strength translates to you being some form of domineering/abrasive because you learned early on that your lot in life was to take care of yourself because nobody else ever did, I see you. If you are so fucking angry all the time and can't pinpoint why, I see you. If you've had to watch as people you care about continue to abandon you in adulthood because you grew up to be type A, controlling and assertive, I see the fuck out of you. It's not your fault that nobody ever gave you a soft place to land so that you could be your true self. And I won't inundate you with condescending platitudes about how you'll find your person/people one day.
Some of us are lucky, but to depend on external sources for your well being is a crap shoot. I won't tell you to keep looking for your home in other people. Home is where you are. Take that strength you've painstakingly cultivated since you were a child, and quadruple it. Become bulletproof, unbreakable. Don't let anyone else find a fault line in you to exploit ever again.
#personal#as someone who tried the route of opening myself up and trusting others even though every fiber in my traumatized body screamed NO#i have been predictably disappointed over and over and over again#i'm not saying isolate yourself necessarily but cultivate a small circle lock it in and stop desiring others to fulfill you#take what you get as a bonus in life but stop thinking that your fulfillment comes from family and romantic relationships#there's a reason these relationships are the most abusive#the more attached you are the weaker you are i hate to say it#and i swear abusers can smell it on you#make peace with the possibility of being solitary in life because until you do others will always be able to control you#i'm sorry that you were fed lies about love and human connection#but the reality is that to most people you are an npc in their life#men are not waiting to be your happily ever after or to finally let you rest after a lifetime of abuse#no matter WHAT they say or how convincingly#if you're a woman seeking a man know that they primarily desire to fuck you and to possess you as a status symbol. that's it.#listen i used to be a love is all you need girl but experience and copious amounts of therapy have taught me that i am all i need.#childhood trauma#childhood abuse#abusive relationships#narcissistic parents#btw this is not an invitation to try and prove me wrong i am happy to have mutuals i interact with#but i am no longer taking applications for new friends or partners#after careful culling the remaining family and friends i have love and care for me just fine i am more than satisfied#now that i've learned how to actually love myself properly there is no void i need others to fill#if i never got close to a new person again i'd be MORE than alright
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