#i love keyleths righteous anger

[deprecious]

Love to see that keyleth anger and you can tell the table was like hell yeah there's keyleth

[trimmedbushproductions]

I love that Keyleth seemed to win Ashton's respect by letting her righteous anger show

Finally An Authority Figure Who's As Fucking Pissed As I Am

[ludinusdaleth]

one of the most fascinating parts of imogen & ludinus's dynamic is that, despite everything, and how much righteous hatred imogen has of him, and how ludinus is the one who led her down this path: ludinus is the literal only person imogen can act like a child to.

she talks to relvin distantly. she talks to liliana, her own mother, like shes the parent and her mother is the child. id say keyleth is the closest she actually has to a mother figure but it is so circumstantial, and imogen is hyperaware she needs to be on her best behavior or else be treated as a threat. shes the face of the bells as a party, and even if theyre silly and emotional together, she feels she must always pull them together and speak on their behalf, and she knows she will be put down if she turns "bad" by them. her own party.

she can fucking yell at ludinus. she can tease and mock him incessantly. because no one can judge her for it. in the moments shes in his vacinity she acts as though hes a shitty step dad who fucks her mom badly and she mocks aeor in front of him and she mocks that he isnt ruidisborn and shes ugly about it (correctly so). and it is release. she cant do that, she cant rant, she cant break, not to the bells, not to her mother, not to fucking anyone. so she'll throw a (completely justified) tantrum at him so much deeper than any current conflict, it's blood deep, how dare he steal her life and her moms life and how dare he destroy exandria for his plan and how fucking dare he-

ludinus, seeing the visage of liliana's likeness exactly in her child, takes the hits. as far back as c2 we see him able to lower his head at his actions. he at least has enough humanity somewhere that he has capacity for shame even if he will not fix it. he yaps to the high heavens but he allows others to batter him all the same when it comes to how he's hurt them, which i find a very unique trait among his kind of villain. and i think that awareness compounded with seeing the kin of this woman he clearly "loves" (even if insanely badly) is oddly a perfect conduit to imogens rage. he occasionally talks back but he never expresses anger with her - she merely considers predathos for a millisecond and is threatened by the world, but when she mocks the deepest worst fears of ludinus, he holds fast. they are an unstoppable force & immovable object of words thrown as shards of glass. ludinus who claims himself the child and who stole imogens parent is oddly the most parent-like in stoicism against a rebellious childs words, as she descends into being the child she couldnt be . he doesnt even chastise her. he can only look at her despairingly when she wont treat her mother with reverence, not him.

just. theyre so interesting. ludinus and the temults everybody

[utilitycaster]

I love your thoughts on Astrid and I think a lot about whether her initial ambition to become powerful for the sake of power turned into the ambition for power so no one else has power over her. I truly do not think she begrudges Wulf his faith any more than she begrudges Caleb his new life though I would not be surprised if both are sources of some pain for her. (in a way the three of them remind me of trees. Caleb lost a part of himself but that allowed new sprouts to come forth. Wulf found faith that allowed the damage to be lessened by giving support to the damaged part of the tree. And Astrid is the one with neither who grows around the damage in the only direction she ever knew though it costs her much more in the long term than the other solutions)

Hi anon,

So I think I say this whenever I get similar asks - completely valid to have your own headcanons, but (and this is foreshadowing for the rest of this ask) I am not much of a people pleaser and I will openly disagree, as I'm about to, and this might be a conversation better had in DMs or replies or something because doing so via anon gets to be a lot of back and forth.

I really respect people who relate to Astrid as a survivor of abuse who finds some measure of peace and who simply acknowledges she, Eadwulf, and Caleb all found separate ways to move forward. I completely understand that can be very meaningful and would never take that interpretation from them.

With that said, I happen to personally prefer a view of Astrid who is capable of that bitterness. I like the possibility that she is not just ambitious (which, that on its own is often considered sufficient to lambast female characters; see the Suvi Kedberiket discourses surrounding Worlds Beyond Number) but also very angry, and at times bitter, and at times resentful.

I think a lot of fans struggle with the gray area between unambigously heroic women and unambiguously villainous ones, both because in that gray area is a complexity women in fiction are frequently denied, and also because it requires a look at specific emotions women aren't supposed to have. Women can be sad; they can be traumatized; and they've been granted such qualities as "determined" or "can use a sword" or "leaders" but I think people really still struggle with anger, and especially anger that is not specifically directed towards abusers (like Beau or Yasha or Vex) nor righteous (like Keyleth) but petty or even simply irrational.

I like Astrid as a woman who might hold a grudge she knows intellectually is unfair but who feels it anyway. I think about how she wanted to kill Trent in the moment, and that Fjord (someone whose story is very much about both forgiveness and the legitimacy of grudges and a desire for power) validates her for it even though it's true that Caleb's method of exposing Trent's crimes is probably more effective. I like her as someone who is incredibly intelligent and who probably has an idea of what the "good" thing to do is and still feels a lot of ugly feelings and possibly always will, even though she has found a much healthier way forward. I don't know quite how this interrogation will go, but it is interesting that she's in hiding in Zadash and has apparently not openly broken with the Assembly.

It's funny, because this is on some level what many people want for much of Bells Hells - they want them to be angry at the gods for neglecting them. It's just...they also want that anger to be righteous. And sometimes anger isn't. Anger is often petty and detrimental and yet still very real. What appeals to me about Astrid is that she is very much a complicated person who does straddle a line between ally and antagonist and is permitted a depth and messiness and moral ambiguity that many fans deliberately try to excise from women (and, for that matter, characters of color/in-world racialized characters and many queer characters). So I do like an Astrid who clearly cares for Caleb and for Eadwulf and does not treat them poorly, but does perhaps nurse some privately-held grudges.

[airshari]

feeling kind of emotional about keyleth being this naive, kind-hearted girl who over the course of a campaign grew into a wisened leader who isn’t perfect, but is trying to be good enough for all the people she represents. a woman who is still kind, but aged by what she’s seen –– a woman who doesn’t let bitterness hold her back, but is really weighed down by the unbelievable grief and burden of what it means to be leader and archdruid. 

[sky-scribbles]

I absolutely love how TLOVM is going out of its way to show that Keyleth’s  emotions are what make her powerful.

Throughput C1, Keyleth feels everything at 110%. Her righteous fury - toward the world for being the harsh place it is, toward Raishan - burns with the fire of a sun. She grieves deeply and achingly and angrily. She loves her friends with everything she has - is afraid to love Vax because she knows just how hard she’ll love him if she lets herself, what it could do to her. She doubts herself because she cares so much all the time. She cares about doing the right thing and is terrified of getting it wrong; she cares about being the leader the Ashari deserve; cares about meeting her own sky-high expectations of herself.

And after all the idiots back when C1 was airing complaining about Marisha making “““suboptimal””” choices to roleplay Keyleth’s emotions, after the dumb fucking complaints about her being ‘overemotional’ or ‘illogical’ or whatever... here’s TLOVM, where Keyleth is at her strongest when she lets herself feel everything.

A demon wolf threatens Vax, and she punches it away, fangs bared, full of protective rage. Terror for her friends, love for her friends, leads her to clutch-cast shields of thorns to save them from Brimsycthe, from the Briarwoods. She sees a rebel friend cut down and the camera zooms in on the grief in her eyes, followed by utter rage as she transforms into Minxie for the first time. She Skywrites the Whitestone crest with hope and delight in her eyes. She holds back an undead tide with a wall of ice, screaming and yelling.

And I’m just. So happy! I’m so happy that the show is letting Keyleth rage and shout when she’s angry, and be scared when she’s overwhelmed! I love that they’re illustrating how her deep sensitivity is the curse that makes her insecure... and the blessing that makes her care so fiercely that her spells can tie down a dragon, hold back a zombie horde.

This is the woman whose righteous anger will drive her to be a protector, whose ferocious caring will lead her to be the best possible leader of her people. TLOVM lets her scream and yell and be messy and full of feeling - and shows that even as it’s hard for her, even as she struggles to process her feelings, and even when her feelings lead her to clash with her friends, they are what makes her strong.

I love her so much. Just so, so much.

[disasterhumans]

What are your thoughts on Keyleth’s grieving style?

Oh man, I don’t have fully formulated Thoughts, and it’s been several months since I finished c1, but here are some quick and dirty takes wild ramblings (nothing I've ever written was “quick” why was i trying to fool myself):

I mean I think Keyleth herself summarized her grieving process pretty well: She compartmentalizes. (Vex does too, but it’s different.) In some ways, she may have been happy to immediately Have a Mission after they defeated Vecna. She’s heartbroken, and she misses the love of her life, but Having Something To Do not only provides a great distraction, it also lets her fall into a dynamic she’s familiar with: she’s a bit silly, a bit earnest, and there to take on the role as Tank to protect her remaining friends. She turns into an earth elemental and makes silly gesticulations. Vox Machina is down two members, but she still knows where and how she fits in their group. Meanwhile, she really doesn’t know how to mourn yet (the other major loss in her life happened when she was a child, and while they’ve lost friends along the way, I think we can safely say Vax was her first capital ‘l’ Loss.), So she falls back on what she knows, and she power through.

She’s super angry. In general I don’t think Keyleth’s capacity for anger is recognized enough. Her anger doesn’t typically express itself in the way we’re used to seeing anger. At times it comes out as righteous indignation rather than actual rage or ire. But as much as Keyleth is scared of what the future of her life may be, she also angry about it. She cares about the world so deeply, and she gets mad at people who wreak havoc and harm. While they go through Pandemonium, her anger seems to rise and fall. She keeps it at bay for stretches at a time, but then a group of bugbears take Percy’s arm, and it’s just another thing on top of all of the things that have happened. She’s powerful enough to bring back Percy’s fucking arm but not strong enough to bring her partner? boyfriend? they never got to a point where he could be her fiance or her husband Vax back. Vax is dead, they’re trudging through Pandemonium to save Grog’s soul, and now Percy’s lost an arm. I’d be fucking pissed too.

But for much of the journey her anger manifests as some Grade A pettiness. She puts on a sweet, almost simpering smile and asks if there’s anyone else who could possibly join them aside from Lieve’tel, a cleric of the being who stole Vax from her. Vax accepted his death, but neither Vex nor Keyleth did. They still think of it as him being robbed. (Because, remember, they had a plan to bring him back. It was a plan that might have cost them time on the fight, and one which may not have worked. But they all had every intention of bringing Vax back themselves after episode 102.) Marisha could very well have played Keyleth as super dour and pessimistic throughout the one-shot–it would have been a valid acting choice and would have been really interesting to see play out. But instead Keyleth is prickly. Keyleth is generally rather nice and polite. But being known as the “nice one,” means that when you really are just angry and bitter at the world, sometimes the only way it can come out is through being viciously catty. (I love it.)

Also Percy ends up serving as a conduit of her anger at various points. I find their friendship dynamic deeply fascinating. They really don’t even need words with each other. I could only vaguely make out what Marisha-as-Keyleth-as-Earth-Elemental was saying, and Percy not only translated it accurately, but did so eloquently on the first try. Percy’s comment to Lieve’tel about the RQ owing a “great debt,” was surely a reflection of Percy’s own feelings about Vax’s loss, but much more than that I think it was him translating for Keyleth what she felt she couldn’t say. I think that Keyleth relies on Percy to essentially be her “anger translator” in a lot of different contexts, but especially now, I think she leans on him pretty heavily in this oneshot to know how she’s feeling without needing to talk about it. There will be time for tears and talking and processing somewhere down the line. For now, having someone who almost instinctively knows what’s going through her head is such a lightening of the load.

And to put a finer point on Percy’s comment to Lieve’tel being an expression Keyleth’s anger and loss: Percy calls the debt one that is “centuries in the making,” which of the face of it seems hyperbolic. But Keyleth (and Scanlan and Pike) will be around for centuries. This is a loss that will literally be felt by some of those closest to Vax for centuries to come. And what’s more Lieve’tel is liable to live for centuries to come as well. 

Anyway, I had a lot of feelings about Keyleth during the one-shot and I’d love to spend more time breaking this down further at some point, but I’ll leave this here for now.

[sparxwrites]

If Pike went dark, I could easily see the rest of them being dragged down with her. Like, she's the glue that holds them together, she's their center? So when Pike goes down that road they follow, because they'd follow her to the ends of the earth. Grog is first, his morals have always been loose and it's his monstah, of course he follows her. Percy is next, the darkness in her calling to him. Then Scanlan, his morals loose and even if he's not infatuated with her anymore, Pike is still /pt 1

Pt 2/ family. Then the twins, because where one goes the other follows. Then finally Keyleth, she hadn't wanted to hurt anyone but it's Pike, so she allows herself to be drawn in with the rest of them? Idk, evil Vox Machina? Pike becoming the leader, but not really? (Related to my asks about the curse being real) The thing sharing her body really calls the shots, and corrupts her until it doesn't have to give her orders for her to be cruel? Idk, this idea is just appealing and I'm Into It

oh yeah, pike is absolutely their center and their moral compass (though keyleth helps, i think, so she’d have to either leave / die / be complicit in this too), so... yeah. this is absolutely a thing that could happen tbh.

honestly i like it more with the idea of it just being pike snapping, tbh? like. she’s sick of being left behind, sick of feeling left out, sick of being put up on a pedestal like some untouchable goddess, sick of being the Nice One, sick of listening to a god that still lets her friends die and awful things happen, sick of her needs and wants being put last, sick of loving all of them and getting nothing back... and it happens slowly, so slowly, but eventually the bitterness just takes her over. and it feels so good and powerful letting go, she feels almost righteous in her anger. and by the time she realises how dark she’s become, it’s too late to stop it. she’s committed.

[quasieli]

[Image Description: A series of tweet from @Zelle1832 on twitter. The tweets read:

"I want to talk for a minute about #CriticalRole and female anger, and how it is one of the few shows I've seen that allows these characters to feel this anger fully, without being belittled or shamed for it. So often female anger is branded like this negative thing. (1/13)

It's just that character being a bitch, being hysterical, taking things too seriously or too personally. God can't they just take a joke? God it's not that big a deal. This is why no one likes you, etc. Women don't get to be angry, because angry isn't pretty. (2/)

It's in your face, and it doesn't let things slide, and it is so often more justified than people want to recognize. To see the female characters get to not only feel anger, but to express that anger, for better or for worse, is a breath of fresh air. (3/)

And the source of that valid anger is all so different. Yasha's comes from grief, for her wife and for her home. Beau's is because she's had to fight for everything her whole life. She never got to be a kid, because that childhood didn't belong to her, not really. (4/)

Pike's is the righteous anger of someone who knows life isn't fair, but goddamnit she's going to take on literal gods if she has to to make sure her friends are safe. Keyleth's is the anger of someone who has lost so much, and has so much more to lose, and (5/)

it isn't fair, and nothing will change it. And she's so tired, and tired of being treated like she knows nothing of the world. Cassie de Rolo who lost everyone she loved in one night, whose free will is taken from her, and whose brother then returned, (6/)

only to leave her alone again once more with a burden too heavy for shoulders so young. Jester who was isolated out as a child, even though it was out of love. Jester who is tired of being treated like her concerns aren't serious. Jester who's best friend, (7/)

her god, didn't show up in one of the worst moments of her life. Jester who is watching all her friends walk through fire, and she is only one person who can only put out so many flames at a time. Vex who had a child[hood]* she loved taken and replaced with one she hated (8/)

and that hated her in return, only to find the one she loved gone up in flames. Who's brother is being taken from her too soon, and its not fair, it isn't. And Nott, who's life was also taken from her. Who was turned into something she never wanted to be, (9/)

The world is not kind to people who look like her, she knows that too well. And there are so many more from there. Kima and Allura, Zahra and Lilith, Keg, and Dairon, and Avantika, and so so so many others. (10/)

And yeah, sometimes they are petty and petulant and rude. Sometimes their frustration isn't pretty or justified, but it's always treated like a natural part of them being human, and as a consequence of all the things they've been through. (11/)

It's just another testament to how much care and heart is put into these characters, by all of the cast, but especially the women, of which there are too many to tag here. This is just one more way that they continue to tell rich stories (12/)

That every person can find a place in. Where everyone belongs. Thanks @CriticalRole for this incredibly special thing you've created, and to the women of the cast, guest or otherwise, who continue to be as kick ass as the characters they have created. <33"

*OP clarified this typo in the replies. End description.]

I may have spilled some feelings on twitter.

[sky-scribbles]

I posted 598 times in 2022

88 posts created (15%)

510 posts reblogged (85%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@mikkeneko

@viciousmollymaukery

@essektheylyss

@bravest-notts

@ayzenigma

I tagged 481 of my posts in 2022

Only 20% of my posts had no tags

#critical role - 299 posts

#c2 - 115 posts

#essek thelyss - 83 posts

#shadowgast - 65 posts

#c3 - 45 posts

#caleb widogast - 43 posts

#cr spoilers - 42 posts

#exu: calamity - 35 posts

#c3 spoilers - 32 posts

#birds!!! - 26 posts

Longest Tag: 111 characters

#that's just. how you do narrative structure so that plots events don't feel like they've come out of left field

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Absolutely love how at the core of the Coromar-Seelies'... everything is the fact that Loquatius's love language is loud and obvious and tangible and showy ('hello yes I'm going to use this apocalypse warning message as a metaphor for our marriage! Also I would like every citizen in two cities to know she is the most beautiful woman alive. I am speaking to a civilisation but also only to her. Time for a mid-battle proposal!'

And Laerryn's love language is very clearly 'we will sit quietly and read separate books in the same room. This is the most ferociously intimate experience of my life.'

1,920 notes - Posted June 21, 2022

#4

I absolutely love how TLOVM is going out of its way to show that Keyleth’s  emotions are what make her powerful.

Throughput C1, Keyleth feels everything at 110%. Her righteous fury - toward the world for being the harsh place it is, toward Raishan - burns with the fire of a sun. She grieves deeply and achingly and angrily. She loves her friends with everything she has - is afraid to love Vax because she knows just how hard she’ll love him if she lets herself, what it could do to her. She doubts herself because she cares so much all the time. She cares about doing the right thing and is terrified of getting it wrong; she cares about being the leader the Ashari deserve; cares about meeting her own sky-high expectations of herself.

And after all the idiots back when C1 was airing complaining about Marisha making “““suboptimal””” choices to roleplay Keyleth’s emotions, after the dumb fucking complaints about her being ‘overemotional’ or ‘illogical’ or whatever... here’s TLOVM, where Keyleth is at her strongest when she lets herself feel everything.

A demon wolf threatens Vax, and she punches it away, fangs bared, full of protective rage. Terror for her friends, love for her friends, leads her to clutch-cast shields of thorns to save them from Brimsycthe, from the Briarwoods. She sees a rebel friend cut down and the camera zooms in on the grief in her eyes, followed by utter rage as she transforms into Minxie for the first time. She Skywrites the Whitestone crest with hope and delight in her eyes. She holds back an undead tide with a wall of ice, screaming and yelling.

And I’m just. So happy! I’m so happy that the show is letting Keyleth rage and shout when she’s angry, and be scared when she’s overwhelmed! I love that they’re illustrating how her deep sensitivity is the curse that makes her insecure... and the blessing that makes her care so fiercely that her spells can tie down a dragon, hold back a zombie horde.

This is the woman whose righteous anger will drive her to be a protector, whose ferocious caring will lead her to be the best possible leader of her people. TLOVM lets her scream and yell and be messy and full of feeling - and shows that even as it’s hard for her, even as she struggles to process her feelings, and even when her feelings lead her to clash with her friends, they are what makes her strong.

I love her so much. Just so, so much.

2,867 notes - Posted February 11, 2022

#3

My favourite Critical Role verbal flubs:

‘Why a - why is you so mean to me???’

‘Snea snake’

‘Their brand new 5e setting, Aeorar. ... Ayroawra. Auroara.’

‘Let’s make ourselves a bit more suspicious.’

‘Wildmother, please watch over the cast - the crew!’

‘Looks like I ganked your new Robbie - your new friend’s body!’

‘Shiver and quiff’

2,877 notes - Posted September 28, 2022

#2

My ideal way for Essek to be in the M9 reunion twoshot is for the Dynasty to have just found out about his crimes, and for the Nein to have invited him to come stay with them on the Nein Heroez for a little while. ‘You’ll be safe here for a while,’ Caleb tells the anxious wreck of a drow who’s just dropped five duffle bags full of books onto the deck of the ship. ‘We were all planning to take a little voyage together anyway. You can get some peace, have some time to think, be with your friends. No Dynasty, no Empire, no eye-covered monstrosities...’

And a fifty-foot leviathan covered in eyeballs erupts from the water, screeching.

Essek isn’t even surprised anymore.

3,304 notes - Posted October 18, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

... yes, Google Docs, that is exactly what I meant to write. How could I have been so foolish.

4,649 notes - Posted July 31, 2022

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