#i love him so much like its actually crazy
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okay so very long thinkpiece about meljay and jayce' treatment of mel / the writers treatment of mel and how i think that all things considered she hasnt really won as much as we think she did
the thing about this that makes me so mad or rather sad (both, actually) is that we learn in season 1 how mel was brought up, that she didn't get to be soft and kind, that her surroundings were hard and rough just like her mother was, that love isn't a thing she knows like that especially not in relation to vulnerability. now if you think about media in general there is a pattern we know. the black woman is always the strong woman, the independent woman, the woman who doesnt get to be vulnerable bc of the first two points. so here comes this man she's trying to use not just for her own endeavors but for the good of piltover, clearly having a different mindset than her mother, and he cracks her open just like that. he's vulnerable with her and he lets her be vulnerable with him and it allows this woman this kind of vulnerability that she was never allowed to feel. she feels and she loves and there is someone who holds her and looks out for her when things go bad. he is his first thought after the bombing and hes so loving and endearing unlike her mother who is concerned, of course, but straight back to business too. and oh what a lovely thing that was to watch as a black woman who to this day still doesn't get to see this as often as we really should
so mel gets to experience something she hasnt before and you can tell it means something to her because when she gets back in act 3 the first reaction to him is an excited, hopeful one.
this is the man she cares deeply for and it is also the man who shes comforted before many times. something she needs in those very confusing times too. something she might be looking out for. something she might hope to get herself. some comforting after what shes been through for months. someone to share what is going on with her and how confusing it is to find out all those lies and secrets about herself.
until she notices how changed he is, how different he looks, so instantly she is worried. of course! who wouldnt be! she very likely didnt even know he was missing since its the first time we see her back in the city so she must've assumed he has been here and well for the whole time being (does she even know how long its been?) but it isnt fine as we know. she puts herself second! immediately! (and rewatching that scene now it actually makes me mad how she does that. and how anyone can question any of her feelings for him when shes immediately all jayce. or how in general people think shes only interested in her own goals) she asks this man who has shown her to be vulnerable around him and it BEING FINE, what happened, shes opening herself up to him, again, over and over, and he not only tells her it doesnt matter (what happened to him) but TURNS HIS BACK ON HER. he is literally shutting her off. he is saying with his body she does not get to do that. and for someone who has grown up like this, with a mother cutting off any kind of displays of weakness, this must be a familiar feeling, something that goes off like a bell
but she still tries! she still tries! she sees something is wrong but she tries to get comfort anyway, because this is jayce, right, this is the man she cares for deeply, the man who has opened this door for her and the door she's let herself through, the man who has always had compassion for her. of course she tries again. why wouldn't she? so she starts that something has happened to her but he doesn't even let her tell him what happened (actually it makes me so mad seeing this again and how crazy hostile he is towards her, its like im looking at the mel hating part of arcanetwt and him repeating beat for beat what theyve been saying for years) he doesnt give her room to speak, just takes it for himself, prioritizing himself and his own feelings. and, yes, figuring out the bombing thing and wanting to talk about it is valid and i think in general this could've been a great angsty way to deal with this topic IF they would've had the opportunity to talk this out properly but what happens instead is that the man that makes mel feel safe starts INTERROGATING her like she is a criminal that should be held for trial FOR SAVING HIM something she doesnt even undestand herself. and suddenly she is in a whole different position and i think by now she knows that this kind of compassion and understanding and room for vulnerability isn't part of their conversation anymore
she loses her composure and that of course isnt a first because she has started to be less put together around him, allowing her more room to "sway" but this kind of destruction is a different one because she feels at trial, feels cornered, feels like she has to explain herself but - and thats what is important - isnt heard. and i think that is something she knows very well, something shes grown up with, trying to explain herself and not being heard.
all of that happens while he is, mind you, still holding onto that hammer. something she surely notices too. the man who's usually quick to let down his defences around her, who isnt councilor talis or mister talis but just jayce around her, is holding onto that hammer like shes a threat. so he tells her he thinks shes lying and she asks him why he would think she'd do that, obviously, because her understanding of their relationship and their trust is a different one than his or at least this jayce that has come back from the arcane, because clearly this kind of understanding comes from somewhere and it comes from the times they've spent together alone throughout season 1 and a little in the beginning of season 2.
he throws at her that shes been using him, something that surprises her, because clearly she doesnt know what has happened, but she tries to explain anyway, because she doesnt know what has happened at least not in full (as you can tell by her reaction to viktor appearing, sensing the hostile mood between both, but also the way she reacts when viktor mentions the noxians intentions), and you can see that these thoughts of his are a result of months in the arcane alone with them and imagining conversations over conversations (although for me its still hard to understand how he grew that hostile towards her this quickly as if she were responsible for everything that happened but those are thoughts for a different post). he crashes out during that conversation, his face is warped with hatred and that is. all. for. her. to. see. and then BOOM goes the hammer off. mid conversation. a conversation that should feel safe with a man she should feel safe with but none of that is there. there is no space for her. (and yes i know hes aiming at viktors puppet but that isnt somethng mel is aware in that moment)
it all leads up to a fight and eventually they walk together and he apologizes, although very distantly and without much explanation, and despite it all, despite having good reasons to shut off and not share what she's feeling, she does. she talks to him about what is on her mind and they have a short, bittersweet exchange but it's just nowhere to what they've established in the first season. as a shipper of course that is super frustrating, but as a mel fan it's just sad to see that the person she felt safe enough to seek comfort in is just so closed off. but not only that, it's obvious they're parting ways and it's very obvious this is coming from his side and i think that is also why she so wilingly accepts it. she doesn't fight much back throughout their whole fight earlier either, she tries to explain herself, but doesnt demand that room for herself even though in this relationship she should be able to take just as much room for herself and her feelings as he does, but she doesn't. she just lets it happen and i understand it bc you have this man you trust and probably love and his first reaction to you is hostile when hostile has never been a response to her. he made a complete u-turn and of course that's off putting, maybe even scary, of course it shuts her down, makes someone who's so good with words and fighting just try to cause as little damage as possible because that is how she's grown up, isn't it?
and that is why i am sad about this. she learned that love doesnt have to look like her mothers and that being vulnerable isnt a weakness and its his doing but here she is met by this kind of hostility she only knows from noxus and it hurts even more that it COMES FROM HIM and over something as SAVING HIS LIFE when its clearly was an act out of love and not investment bc if i'd would've been just that than she would've saved viktor as well? but it wasnt about that. it was her subconscious making a decision and it was something her mother would describe as an act of weakness (theres a reason she gets renni to attack him bc she sees how fond mel of him is maybe even because shes been fond of a man herself once and she knows what itll do) and i think the worst part about it is that she doesnt ever get to truly articulate this or anything else and now that jayce is gone (dead? in a stone? who knows?) she won't get to ever probably. she won't get to say what she thinks and explain herself truly and she won't have anyone to confide in, to be comforted by or comfort. elora is dead, kino wasn't real and the real one is actually dead too, jayce is well whatever he is, and her mother died in her arms. yes, mel is a mage and that is fucking awesome and i was so happy to see her go off and get so many spotlights in battle, but shes also so fucking tragic actually. because here she is with a fuck ton of weight on her shoulders, the noxian army looking up to her, the whole name, not knowing who her father is or what any of her powers mean, the whole black rose thing, everything unresolved between her and jayce, the death of the people she loves, and shes all alone with it. shes all alone with it and she gets no one. man im just fucking sad that this woman got a glimpse of what it could be like to be loved and have someone to "come home to" just for her to have literally no one left like why do you hate black women so much why cant they get a fucking good ending and why cant they be fucking loved even when things get hard
also im lowkey mad that jayce got to find comfort in her lap so many times and not once did she get that in return, not even a squeeze of her shoulder, but dont let me get started on that....
#mel medarda#jayce talis#meljay#onlymeljay#goldenforge#arcane#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane spoilers#kds.txt#im sorry this is a lot but i have so many thoughts#a lot of them hurt me#but i think this one just kills me the most#i wanted her to have something she didnt have before#it was so nice to see her being treated this well#only for it to end like that#and so cold too
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NSFW ALPHABET- Pope Heyward
Wearing: +18,smut, English is not my first language
a = aftercare (how they feel after sex):
would definitely be extremely attentive and kind after sex. Constantly ask if it hurts you and check your body. He’s afraid of hurting you because he has a bigger dick than the average.
He is ready to take care of you right after having sex. She cleans you by kissing you tenderly and telling you how good you felt; she always asks if you have cramps of penetration and if you do so she makes you a nice warm compress to put on. He keeps you safe and cuddly, giving you sweet cheeks on your forehead to make you feel safe.
b=favorite body part (favorite part of your body and his):
He loves every part of your body, he loves your smile that can calm him when he is nervous.
He loves your ass very much, is obsessed. He can’t stop slapping and squeezing him... loves to kiss and bite him and the sight of your ass all red from his slaps makes him crazy...
His favorite part of his body is his beautiful muscular physique and he loves when you look at his muscles without shame, he knows well that this thing makes you wet; and above all he is very proud of what he carries between his legs (his friends always tease him saying he has a third leg because it’s bigger)
He loves it when you are impressed every time you see him naked (no matter how many times you have seen him like this) and when he fights to get his dick... he gets crazy.
c = cum (anything to do with sperm):
he sure loves cumming inside you. for him there is nothing better than finishing inside you and seeing his sperm drip out; he would never admit it out loud, but the idea of cumming inside you excited him even more
d = dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, one of their dirty secrets):
It gets even harder when you suck his dick
I= intimacy (what is it like right now? the romantic aspect):
It has two faces, so it will depend a lot on the occasion and his mood. There will be days when it will be harder, but there will also be days when it will be tender and say sweet words and sweet kisses that make your heart beat faster.
k = node (one or more of its nodes):
• Praise Kink: That man loves to receive compliments but also loves to give them; he just loves saying nice things for you and letting you know how good you are doing. He also likes it when you compliment him, when you let him know how good it makes you feel or how great he feels or even how beautiful he is, he drives him crazy.
•Blowjob Kink: he loves it when you suck his cock so well and try to take it all even if he can’t. He loves it when you play with his balls and you stoke around his dick
L-Location (favorite places to do the activity):
At first it seemed shy but actually it’s not: your first time was on the beach.
He loves to fuck you anywhere and he loves to tease you in public
m= motivation (what excites them, keeps them going):
Just seeing you makes him hard
n = no (something he wouldn't do):
certainly nothing that can hurt you; also, he doesn't like sharing you with anyone (no matter who it is) you are his and just thinking about another man touching you would make him very jealous and angry
o-oral (preference in giving or receiving skills, etc.):
Pope is a huge pussy eater and would definitely make you fall apart with those gorgeous lips but he also likes to get a good blowjob, he can't get over the image of your lips wrapped around his cock as you struggle to take it all and sometimes you choke because it's too long and thick for your mouth but you love taking it and he loves it really fuck your mouth.
r =risk (are they willing to experiment? do they take risks? etc.):
The idea of someone catching you excites him especially because he loves to mark his territory on you to make others understand even more that you are his and no one can have you.
s= stamina (how many rounds can they last? how long do they last?):
he could continue all day... he is like a sex machine.
u = unfair (how much he likes to tease):
he is a tease, he would definitely tease you by blushing around him or being extremely wet and needy for him.
v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.):
he really loves to be vocal: he will definitely moan and grunt while murmuring dirty things to you and praising how you take his cock
x = x-ray (let's see what happens under those clothes):
his cock is very big and long. And trust me that cock will take away your ability to walk and make you feel very good.
d=desire (how high is their sexual desire?):
he is literally never satisfied. He always wants more from you. He’d be offended if you gave him a blow job while he was studying or when you were on the boat.
He like fuck you with a sensual music
#smut imagine#pope heyward imagine#pope obx#pope outer banks#pope heyward x reader#pope heyward#pope heyward smut#jj maybank#jj x kiara#jjk x reader#jjk fanart#jjk#jj maybank smut#jj smut#john b imagine#john b routledge#p links#rafe outer banks#outer banks rafe#topper outer banks#outer banks imagine#outer banks#outerbanks rafe#rafe x reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#sarah cameron#kiara carrera#cleo outer banks#cleo de nile
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I don't get how people don't see Ford's alleged "huge ego" for what it is: a defense mechanism. He has been othered his whole life and his only real friend and brother *did* sabotage him and lose his trust. Stanley only lashed out because he was hurt and didn't mean to break the machine but he still did it. and then immediately acted like it didn't matter even though he knew it was very important for Ford. and then of course there's Filbrick's treatment of him as being Potentially Useful and therefore Accepted and Loved. So why /wouldn't/ Ford develop an inner narrative about being a loner genius eager to prove his worth to the world. It only makes sense for him to have that view of himself. And his arc is literally about letting go of that and untangling it. idk what show these people watched in which this was not exactly what happened. to the character in the shwfhbhjsfg
sorry you drowned at the end of this ask but yeah like stan didnt deserve any of that bc he was a teenager who made a mistake but its crazy people are always trying to pin the blame on ford who was also a teenager instead of their father?? who you know actually kicked stan out?? and yeah like theres so much that led to ford directly tying his self worth to to academic/scientific accomplishments and its crazy how you can see the direct effects of a lifetime of bullying on him as an adult and how it created certain vulnerabilities that were easily exploited but its easier for people to just go aauuugh ford sucks hes so selfish and leave it there i guess. 🤪
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Fortified Wager ♣♣♣ 𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 8
♦︎♦︎ Aventurine x Reader ♦︎♦︎ 𝕀𝕝𝕝𝕦𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕕
🄱🄰🄲🄺 🅃🄾 【Chapter 7】
𝕋𝕒𝕓𝕝𝕖 𝕠𝕗 ℂ𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕥
𝐂𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚 𝐕𝐒 𝐁𝐢𝐠 𝐁𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 (𝟏)
╔══ ≪ ♥♦♥ ≫ ══╗
“See? You should have just kept quiet and done as you were told. The truth is, I actually like you. You’re quiet and obedient.”
When Big Baddie stood up, you realized he was twice your size.
So, you let the gems fall, teetering on the edge of the table as bait.
Sorry, Aventurine.
Meanwhile, you let your watch slid over your knuckle as a makeshift brass knuckle. There was no way you’d deal any real damage otherwise.
“I was just trying to save you, you know? I’m sure you also don’t know this, but that Avgin slave over there killed his owner.”
The moment he leaned in, eager to grab a hold of the gems, you swung your fist straight into his face!
“Of course I know, you piece of shit!
Otherwise, what kind of Aventurine’s fan were you?
“Uuoorrggh—!!”
As your fist connected with his nose, you felt the sharp impact reverberate through your knuckles, followed by a sudden, jarring crunch. Big Baddie took the punch square in the face and staggered backward. Soon, he lost his balance and fell, crashing to the ground in a heap.
Regret always came too late.
As you watched your wristwatch fell, shattering its glass on the floor, you realized you still loved it after all!! Also, your hand hurt like a bitch! Shit! Fuck! You could feel tears welling up in your eyes.
Above all, you were furious.
Aventurine never even brought up his past, so who the fuck gave this guy the right to do so?!
You recalled how the pair of violet-cyan eyes looked so lifeless and devoid of emotion the moment his past was mentioned. It was clearly something difficult—something he preferred to keep private, and for obvious reasons.
If Aventurine were a male lead in a romance novel, it would have taken over 100 chapters and three different arcs before he revealed his past!! Even then, it would be only to the person he trusted most, someone he felt comfortable being vulnerable with!! That was just how delicate this was!!
And yet, and yet... this guy, heartlessly, in front of everyone...
In the past, Aventurine's entire family and clan were massacred by their enemies. Though he survived the ordeal, he was soon enslaved. Only God knows the depths of trauma and torment he suffered at their hands—enough to drive him to kill.
“—Hahahaha! Of course! Of course she doesn’t know! That's what you get for letting his looks fool you!”
“Do you know how hard I’ve been holding back my laugh?! I was wondering how to break the news this whole time! Hahahaha!”
Of course, taking a life was rarely, if ever, justified.
But that is not a reason to laugh at or shame him?! Especially not this bastard, who drove two innocent children to seek revenge!!
A single tear rolled down your cheek. Regret, anger, sorrow and pain washed over you all at once—mostly pain.
While shaking your stinging hand like crazy, you screamed at Big Baddie, “But so what—?! So what if he killed his master?!”
If you were beaten within an inch of your life every day and treated far worse than an animal, what would you do?
If you had nothing left to live for but to await your death at the hands of your enslaver, how would you respond?
“—I’d have done the same!!”
Your shoulders heaved up and down as you struggled to regain composure. All you knew was that you were ranting out of sheer rage.
“Shut up!!” Big Baddie stood up while covering his nose. He glowered at you like a beast, blood oozing out of his hands. “You're just a pathetic slut serving tables!! Do you really think I can't destroy you?! That worthless slave won't protect you from me!!”
“...!”
You instantly went quiet.
Seeing this, Big Baddie grinned with triumph, blood staining his gold and white teeth.
...That’s right.
Back when you were merely a third party, you could easily dismiss the whole incident with Big Baddie as "unreasonable." As much as you hated to admit it, you didn’t see it as that big of a deal.
Why didn’t the staff just skirt around the problem, make some excuses, and feign ignorance? Or, even better yet, fight back. Then, call the authority if things escalated. Easy-peasy.
Well, the reason, as it turned out, was plain and simple.
It was the same reason you didn’t pick a fight with every professor who imposed outrageous assignments or feedbacks on you. Or why you hadn’t shoved your middle finger down Erin’s—your actual manager at the restaurant you actually worked at—prissy throat yet.
Because you’d be a dropout and without a job. Now, you wouldn’t say that you knew how every single staff in Primavera felt, but you certainly wouldn’t survive without your job, let alone switch colleges.
Facing against Billy Burnett, the infamous iron-fisted loan-shark, the stakes were even higher. One wrong move, and your entire life could be in jeopardy.
“Need I remind you what kind of authority they have? A single word from them could ruin the lives of many. I wouldn’t care if you’re the only one affected, but I also have something to protect, so stay in your lane.”
You recalled Marius’ words.
You wouldn’t blame him either—or anyone, for that matter. Everyone had their own circumstances. It was called “picking your battles.”
Which was why, only you could do this.
If it wasn’t you—who would?
You grinned.
Thanks for the reminder, Big Baddie.
Thus, as the waiter of the high-end nightclub Primavera, you shot back, “Watch your language! Aventurine is one of our most valued customers, and we do not tolerate any form of abuse or mistreatment toward him!”
“Wha—?!”
Big Baddie had a dumb look on his face. Perhaps this was the first time someone had called him out so boldly.
Also, you weren’t even lying!! Who else could singlehandedly quadruple the profit of a luxurious nightclub?! Calling him Primavera Jesus would be more fitting! Obviously, the staff would want to cling to him—especially after what you were about to do in their uniform, using their name!
While Big Baddie was still flabbergasted, you continued.
“—Given that this behavior has persisted, we are left with no choice but to ask you to leave and ban you from returning!”
After enduring his tyranny for so long, those were likely the words the staff had been dying to say, but couldn’t.
Then, your gaze briefly landed on your crisp, black uniform. Her uniform.
Of course, you wouldn’t pretend to understand how Judith felt either.
Still, when everyone else was too terrified or stunned to do anything, her manager took a punch in the face for her. If you were her, you’d be happy, knowing that most managers out there wouldn’t do even half as much—and at the same time, sad. But above all, angry.
So, you thought of saying this for her.
“—Also, that’s for punching my manager, asshole!!!”
Yes, only you, or specifically, Aschenputtel, could do this.
Aschenputtel, who was destined to lost her job either way. Aschenputtel, who had neither family nor friends, and would disappear past midnight.
Hence, you, Aschenputtel, decided—
—I’m taking you down with me, Big Baddie.
╚══════╝
🄾🄽🅆🄰🅁🄳 🅃🄾 【Chapter 9】
I realized that at the rate I was doing it before, the update will only come once a month, or even 2 months in case anything happened. ૮(˶ㅠ︿ㅠ)ა I don't want to keep you guys hanging for that long. So I decided to post it as soon as a part is finished. Do tell me if any of you prefer that I just finish it as a whole before updating :D
#aventurine fanart#honkai star rail#aventurine x reader#hsr aventurine#aventurine#aventurine x you#aventurine x y/n#aventurine honkai star rail#fanfic#fanart#hsr fanart#hsr x reader#star rail aventurine#aventurine hsr#fortifiedwagerfic#hsr x you#hsr art#hsr fanfic#honkai star rail fanart#maidflowerywrite
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eight years in november and somehow i do not love him any less and i cannot imagine ever falling out of love either
#z.gen#i love him so much like its actually crazy#he is so easy to be with. i was dead tired and exhausted and it was still so easy to be with him in a loud cramped concert hall like.#he loves me so much too. made a joke about my throat hurting in the concert hall and he looked so worried and i was like ohh you love me#i learned today for the first time im the only person he lets touch his hair (he is black for context) and like. im going to chew him alive#like i LOVEEEEEE that man#he also accepts me so much but like. he really fr loves me hes so considerate of me for no reason at all i feel like kid around him#i just truly never get sick of him ever in my life like how can i still love you this much#i dont know how to explain it but i think describing it as luck is the most sensible thing i truly feel like i won the lottery#i love him so much i was i could show the mutuals him like show and tell like that one vid. that is the love of my life#it really is true about the ebbs and flows of a relationship bc we have been through tough ass shit lol but i like.#love him. like dffhkjsbhkfnsjsdkfd i love him so bad. i hang off of his every word and i want to eat him alive#even when we disagree or get moody with each other or whatever i simply Love Him So Much
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i love the bit from oct 17 2020 when tommy and quackity trapped wilbur in a cobblestone box to keep him from pressing the button... wilbur punching through the blocks with his bare hand to try to get to the button... tommy frantically replacing the block in front of him yelling for quackity to do something... the moment when tommy stops, blocks the exit, and tells wilbur to do it. press the button. but then theyd die with him. quackitys like "wait, wait-" but tommy holds his ground and wilbur. ohh wilbur. "why'd you have to make it so hard?"
#my post#this is just me rambling sorry i love that stream ive watched it sososossoooo many times from all 3 povs#AND AFTER TOMMY AND QUACKITY LEAVE....#wilbur replaces the button. i just need to know that its there.#and he goes on and on about how hes such a showman. how he shouldve just pressed it when he was alone.#but he just NEEDED someone to see him he needed someone to bear witness. guh#shaking. shaking. shaking. tommy put so much trust in him in that moment. he looked at him and said i know you want to hurt yourself but yo#wouldnt hurt me. and is he right to believe that? is he? maybe back in lmanberg maybe back during 'your life is worth more than the#revolution' but in pogtopia?? during 'wilbur wanted to be treated poorly so he treated others poorly'? it was a gamble for sure#and i mean as time went on tommy realized that. that as much as he cared about wilbur he couldnt trust him all the way.#but either way. in that moment i think tommy was sure that wilbur wouldnt press it if he realized that tommyd be killed as well.#that even though at this point people were saying wilbur was crazy. that hed lost it. that even if he didnt get it he knew something was#different about wilbur now. in that moment he bet everything on if there was anything of his brother left he wouldnt hurt him.#fucking. collapses onto the floor#disclaimer if anyone actually reads this far im not trying to slander pogbur in 2024 by calling him crazy thats just how like. every single#other character saw him.#anyways thanks for coming to my ted talk
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Happy 10th birthday to Cercerion!
OUGHHH UR RIGHT CERCIE IS 10 YEARS OLD NOW !!!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOY BELOVEDEST DID NOTHING WRONG EVER IN HIS WHOLE LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#ALSO IM RLY HAPPY HIS OLD DESIGN IS NOW MUCH OLDER THAN HIS FIRST DESIGN WOAH!!!!!!#since i drew the old one SO MUCH back in 2014 i remembered it as being so super prevalent. that when i changed his head shape a couple year#it took a while to get used to the not boxy head but god it was so much more fun to draw the beak. and now its the standard#and it makes me rly happy fr fr. i actually thought i changed his design like only 2 years ago but it was SIX YEARS WHAT!! HOW TIME FLIES..#ask#cercerion#SORRY I JJST WANTED TO REPOST ALL OF THESE#omg dude this also means u and i have known each other for 10 years thats CRAZY#this photoset is so funny its like he went from being :D to being >:U over the years but i assure you now hes more chill than before#HIS COLORS HAVE NOT CHANGED FOR EIGHT YEARS ALSO WHATTTTT i just chose the perfect hues forever#sobbing and crying i love this guy so much#i dont show him online a lot or at least i didnt as muhc until recently but hes always in my brain#cercerion may as well be a part of my soul at this point#HAPPYU TENTH BIRTHDAY CERCIE I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLOWING KISSES INTO A HURRICANE FOR U#windyart#sure ill put it in my tag. this is literally my art
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have i talked before about how crazy it drives me that in old bdubs videos he would super abashedly talk about his love for making things pretty? because. it drives me crazy.
at the beginning of mc4 when everyone was clearing out spawn so it was a lifeless flat plot of land to build on and bdubs took it personally and added grass and foliage once everything was built to make the whole landscape more lively and cohesive. and how hed get made fun of for thinking about little shit like that.
also when he got asked what hed be doing if he wasnt doing mc and he mentioned music (i think) and basically was super embarrassed to be like “i know its not very manly, but im super into artsy fartsy stuff”. as if that is a bad thing.
anyway im getting so emo thinking about how in hermitcraft, everyone knows and admires bdubs skill as a builder and its not ever something thats made fun of anymore. thinking about how bdubs never talks down about his own abilities anymore and instead of feeling weird about being a dude whose into artsy fartsy stuff, hes really embraced his career as a creator of beautiful things.
#sorry this post is literally so self indulgent#last rb got to me okay#remembering when i first got into bdubs and id see him in other ppls content and was like ‘oh hes silly haha’#but i didnt actually start watching him until i saw his hc8 base and thought it was one of the coolest things id ever fucking seen in mc#i started watching his videos and the way he talked about block palettes and gradients#and the way hed try things i’d never think could work really blew me away#and hes always been like this#i remember even in hc4 with his modern house#the way he used snow to create a slope was like. mind blowing to me.#ten years after he first did it LOL#hes taught me so much about minecraft as an art medium its fucking crazy#anyway#its been a while since ive gushed about bdubs this feels really good actually#i love him :(#edit: i wasnt gonna say anything when this was a dumb little personal post but ppl are actually rbing it#so i will correct myself#in my tags when i said hc4 i meant mc4#lol
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I am so so happy that lucanis' sensible neutral toned knitted sweater beneath his brooding hotboy black leathers turned out to be exactly the design cue crucial to understanding the actual nature of his character and personality that I took it for the first time we saw his default look fhsdkj. I continue to be enchanted by this detail in particular. it really does say it all
#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age: the veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age spoilers#I was actually not that interested in him in the first phase of the companion reveals until I spotted that and went 'OH-KAY MAYBE??#WE MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING HERE???'#reader... we did have something here & it was everything I could not have dreamt and then some that's exactly what he's like#he's wearing sensible woollen socks while we're running around the anderfels too I know this in my heart#longjohns with knitted patterns of crows and eyes on them. see my vision here and know it as at least the spiritual truth#sorry to be lucanisposting incessantly but you see. I am obsessed. I love this weird lil crow dude so much#garrus levels of emotional security being felt here which is so funny considering how sleep deprived and unstable#he also is at this point in my playthrough fhskadj. and still hearing him say things in his soft little voice makes me feel so safe#just when everything is at its darkest he says something crazy in the most casual straightforward way and light pours into the world#to go 'wait hang on WHAT'
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A portrait of Sir John Herschel because I‘m normal about Pulp Musicals
#yall don’t understand this took so long- amongst the five different versions this went through it took a total of 22 hours#and it’s finally done#god I love sir John Herschel#truly THE guy ever#it’s crazy because I started this way back in the beginning of April and finally picked it back up on Wednesday right before they announced#pulp 4 which I’m so fuckin excited about by the way#oh my god it’s going to wreck me I’m so pumped#and now I gotta get ready for pulp fortnight#but yeah I really wanted to draw him and I wanted to try something more elaborate that some of my typical stuff#I was going to do the shit where artists do the shading in greyscale and then overlay the flat colors but I decided fuck that#because I like to enjoy drawing and as I found out I DO NOT enjoy that#also for some reason doing realism and drawing curt is SO much harder than what I typically do#it took sooooooo long to get him down and make it actually look like him#oh hey fun fact about this drawing before I do my fun fact- I used a screenshot of Duke as a reference for this#ok now for a real fun fact#fun fact: Asteroids can sometimes have moons and rings of their own#alright now I’ve got a billion other drawings to go work on because the grind never stops yall#sir john herschel#john herschel#pulp musicals#the great moon hoax#the brick satellite#the ghost of the antikythera#Curt mega#my art#god yall I love pulp musicals#I’m so insanely pumped for pulp 4 it’s going to be the raddest thing ever#EVERYONE WHO IS READING THIS NEEDS TO GO LISTEN TO PULP MUSICALS PRONTO /nf#PLEASE (its on Apple Music and Spotify)
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@heydevi bro...... fellow understander...... still not over ur gmod solkat theyre so hrhgrbhggfngh 🥺🤲
#fhgghg i love infecting spreading the disease#slkt literally makes me so ill i'd randomly bolt up in bed like#oh my god......... its. so crazy raw to be abruptly left silent in a room full of your formerly loud and chaotic friends#now reduced to a litter of mere corpses. freshly killed and still bleeding they'd died for such trivial reasons#and all you can do is cling to the only other warm figure in the room who's wounded and unconscious but thankfully breathing#the other lone survivor...... mind blank with panic you drag him with you and fucking run#they're insane. i think abt them every day and still shock myself w how insane this ship is#slkt's relationship around fatalism and mortality is unlike any other hs pair it's actually funny they get dunked on so much by the story#bcs when shit starts hitting the fan they're always trying so damn hard to make their deaths count
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idea. since askdusttale answered an ask about where dust got his determination from (because dust has SOME determination just so he can remember the timelines and keep going against the human) and said it was totally up to personal interpretation on how he got his determination. so so so like what if what if dusttale's player did something similar to something new's player and changed dust's code to give him determination??? so dust and killer COULD BOTH had their codes tampered with??? the parallels would be INSANE. they both started off as sans and got their codes tampered with by the player but dust and killer went on two opposite paths. dust out of his own voalition decided to go against the human but killer had to team up with the human no choice at all. the opposite parallels go CRAZY oh god im tweaking
killer doesn't know exactly (since i forgot whether or not he can see codes or something like that. i swear there was an image of him describing fell and swap's code and then his own) but he can SENSE that something's off. something's different about dust that he doesn't quite know about. maybe it gets him to ask a bunch of questions that dust is definitely not open to answering because jesus man mind your own damn business but the question that really sets killer off is the way dust answers when he asks "so if you have determination then how did you get it?" and dust just shrugs his shoulders and said that one day he suddenly remembered the resets and then that's when he got it (and then goes back to mumbling to phantom paps or wtvr) and killer's just like. zomg. a sudden change in behavior or mentality that seemingly has no apparent reason related to the human???? like like like when he suddenly had to agree with the player despite literally never wanting to????? killer is over thinking the implications behind this
meanwhile dust is just annoyed now because killer keeps on following him. he keeps asking him strange questions. wtf why is the guy asking to see his SOUL that's incredibly personal???? he just wants to be left alone man he has no idea what's going on
#this is what happens when i go on my weekly ask dusttale scroll through i come up with ideas like this#one day killer asks dust if he knows about the players and creators#dust says no. and the moment killer starts explaining it to him he backs off#because dust is actually fucking going crazy at what he just barely said#there are people above us that control our stories??? our LIVES???#so he wasn't fighting against some random human but a literal god who wanted to play with him out of curiosity???#dust is never going to forget that conversation. killer knows even that one sentence changed him#dust is really paranoid now when he sees a human. immediately kills them compared to before#yk what let's make this nightmare's gang related! nm notices dust's paranoia toward humans#mans is getting upset because he's killing precious negativity. so he asks killer#killer wtf happened to dust i told you to watch over him and horror (sadly i cant drag him into this hc)#and killer's like i might've told him about creators and players and now he's probably having a crisis over his free will and stuff#yeahhhh that dust gets replaced asap. it's better to leave aus unaware of creators in the DUST (haha)#and then promptly replaces him. killer keeps on eyeing the new dust like#is it a dusttale thing? is it all dusts? or was that the only one? maybe this one KNOWS?#but in the end he leaves him alone bc nm told him too. he's still overthinking those implications though#GOD THIS IS SUCH A COOL FUCKING IDEA#askdusttale i love having freedom to come up with ideas like this BLESS 🙏🙏🙏#listen if there were a real canon reason dust gets determination then i wouldn't have this idea#but dusttale's canon is so loose and just structural its GREAT!!!! i love it#and the fact that the dusttale fics dont even change much to the lore??? just explains dusts personality better#HOW MANY MORE PARALLELS CAN THE MTT HAVE BEFORE THEY EXPLODE I SWEAR#killer sans#dust sans#nightmare sans#murder time trio#bad sanses#utmv#sans au#tricule rant
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something something Duke started his training arc right before Tim died, meaning for most of that year he & Bruce were both grieving; Bruce having completely lost his son (there wasn't even a body) and Duke having functionally lost his parents (they're there but they're not there)
#love duke so much wish literally anyone gave a shit abt him#& its crazy bc i think he & tim might have the most in common out of the batfam re: their origin story#both were 'adopted'/trained while their parents were still very much alive & both r the 'geniuses' of their groups#both figured out batmans identity. neither were trained to fight from birth#i should make a post just abt dukes parallels in the batfam tbh#dc#duke thomas#dc comics#batfam#(im actually not completely sure when tim's 'death' happened relative to dukes story but like it's somewhere in there)#tim drake
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so hey guys i finished dungeon meshi yesterday and i'm still thinking about it
#ria.txt#i spoiled myself so at first i was like 'this is bonkers wtf are they doing in those last few chapters?????'#but then it was like. yeah. i see#love those ch when it's just clearly putting the squad into Situations#also. izutsumi#what i really liked was how tightly the protagonist and the deuteragonist were wound up in the overall themes#the plot the themes the conflict the characters it was very neatly connected#hence i am also now accidentally invested in whatever going on between laios and marcille#not just platonic not romantic not enemies i just think they work well tgt and deeply care for each other its great watching them develop#it's the leader + most trusted advisor / anxious girlfailure + the annoying freak she's somehow attached to vibes#haha that rabbit chapter with marcille. hahha i was like what the fuck man. it was funny and then boom whump [tears streaming down my face]#those shapeshifter chs were sooo much fun esp seeing other chara's perceptions of each other. stealing that#the changeling ones were great too elf senshi is the fucking funniest he looks sooooooo unserious#marcille's evolving perception with death starting with saving falin and saving the squad and her nightmares of outliving everyone-#-and her dad and her 'temper tantrum' and UGH when at the end she said she was fine with falin not coming back.... WAAA. OUGH.#i think dunmeshi handled the trope of 'prophecy of chosen one becoming king' pretty well and it makes sense why laios is the protag#the worldbuilding is so thoughtful as well i liked seeing different characters with different worldviews interact#very solid and well rounded series wooo#the main 4 has such a fun dynamic together#anyways. dunmeshi au.....#more like borrowing the worldbuilding bc charas are too nuanced for a one to one comparison#ren is like some prince of his own species but he's like 34th in line and no one cares about him so he fucks off to eat monsters#which is why he's both snobbish AND a total freak when it comes to his food taste#false is originally in for the money from ren and plans to scam him but unfortunately the cringefail swag captures her#martyn is Obnoxiously Clueless and thinks he's smart but he's not. he's resourceful but also pathetic and crazy#stress cant cook but she thinks she does so everyone goes (≖_≖ ) when she picks up a pot. they delegate her to killing and chopping duty#the mvp is iskall who keeps on saving everyone's asses and somehow has resources for everyone#i think ren is actually aware false is going to scam him but he has too much money to spend anyway and he thinks shes cool so he lets her??#and somehow she doesnt take the money and run. and goes back to eating monsters w/ the party. everyone is crazy
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big fan of luo binghe
#I love him#I have complicated feeling on bingge#hes just a little guy#shen jiu will burn in hell#I like shen jiu a little bit#svsss#scum villian self saving system#scumbag villain#scum villain#I have so many thought on lbh#its actually crazy#I love him so much#hashtag#I love svsss#it might become my new main#rereading#I love the extras#I love binghe
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At this point I don't think Teruki's parents are exceptionally horrible individuals (long-term psychological consequences still happen in cases in which the abuse isn't considered particularly severe + everyone is capable of harm, even "good" people), but they weren't the best, without a doubt.
Okay, they got too busy with their jobs and had to move overseas to progress on their career. External circunstances. Things that happen. They left their son behind, but that could always be justified by hectic schedules of ever-moving businesspeople. How else could he have a stable routine to focus on his future? They're just busy. Teruki hasn't seen them in long but that's not their fault, right?
They cared for Teruki, didn't they? His parents made sure that there was someone home to watch him whenever they were far away. It was inevitable that there would be times he would be with himself, though. But that's not bad! It only became a problem once those strange espers tried to take hold of him on the street. And even then, they were so weak he could barely give them the title of a psychic. It wasn't an issue that it happened more and more and there was no one to intervene. Or that Teruki had to torture descriptions of "Claw organization" and "brainwashed soldiers" out of these grownups to know what they wanted with him. His parents couldn't know. Why should they know? Better put: what could they do?
What could a normal person do against someone with psychic powers?
It was Teruki's choice to live by himself. He could manage it all. Contrary to the other kids, he was an independent and responsible young man who could be trusted with a house and money. Such a great boy. His parents were so proud to have someone as competent as him as a son, one which wouldn't mean hard work for them. One who always had the best grades and was the soccer team's best player and was the best student on the town's best middle school.
Of course they would suddenly allow Teruki to live on his own. Any parent with a child like him would, wouldn't they? Anyone on their right mind and who knew the slightlest about him would be sure he could do it.
And even if this "Claw" organization scared him a bit and he felt a bit lonely at times, it wasn't an issue. Issue would mean it was an obstacle - which it wasn't, as Teruki did perfectly on his own. His parents believed on so. That's why he had his own apartment at 12 on the first place. Teruki was so wonderful at this. It wasn't horrible if they didn't answer his calls, because they were so busy and he wasn't a little kid who depends on his mommy. None of this was their fault. He shouldn't bother them or himself over this.
Because they cared, right? On the end, it was only a pile of tragic circunstances and coincidences no normal person could act against. It was part of life as someone special like him. He couldn't expect that his parents could change any of this, and this made his loneliness the best possible choice. It was obvious that they would support such a decision.
What would a normal person do against someone with psychic powers?
#this was supposed to be a short description of how I imagine the Hanazawas but I got carried away with the prose#I suppose I'll leave some of the original idea here on the tags#for some reason Teruki's parents seem to be the type of absent parents who do care about their children#yet they don't have the slightlest ability to provide a happy and healthy life besides the generic ideal of a perfect kid#a kid who has a nice home and money to have fun and is physically healthy and has good grades#and their son is so special. of course they would brag about him at any opportunity to do so because it shows how they're good parents#yet they don't put any extra effort on caring for their kid besides this “minimum”. why would they? isn't he happy enough?#they gave such a damn perfect life for him! look how great he is doing by himself! look how he is an amazing kid!#and they say it like an irritatingly oblivious owner talks about their pet dog who has clear behavior and health issues#and their lack of emotional effort and actual care for teruki's wellbeing is so morbidly comical it warps into not being even funny#its just painful and absurd and they don't have an idea on how their choices are absolutely crazy bad#because there is no way you could be implying they're bad parents. they love teruki so much#mp100#mob psycho 100#teruki hanazawa#lalá rambling...
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