#i love him so much i’ve got 2 tattoos for his characters

[bobfloydssunnies]

happy birthday lew !!!

[kamaluhkhan]

TIME TO PRETEND

pairing: luke castellan x gn!poseidon!reader word count: 5k chapter summary: you're the eldest child of poseidon and the hero of the last great prophecy. you left your demigod life behind after defeating kronos. now, years later, you find yourself back at camp half blood for the summer.....which means dealing with luke castellan, and all that history (tension?) left unresolved between you. warnings: some nicknames for reader are based on female characters (mermista, sailor neptune) but they're still written as gender neutral. reader has tattoos. mention of alcohol + death (post-titan war). spoilers for the entire pjo (book) series, mostly references to the last olympian. timeline is all over the place but set in the early 2000s for vibes. no betrayal (au where chris was the one who sided w kronos and led the titan army) so slightly ooc luke <3 author's note: welcome to another product of my pjo hyperfixation !!! i wanted to finish the nemesis!reader series first but it's summer and i felt like reworking my tsitp series in a camp half-blood setting with bb luke. so prepare for childhood friends to lovers drama! summertime vibes! nostalgia! angst! would love to know what y'all think about this and if you want a part 2 so feel free to scream at me in the comments. otherwise, enjoy and thanks 4 reading 💙

♪: time to pretend by mgmt

YOU’VE GOT MAIL!

1 new message 

from: LukeNotSkywalker

to: Mermista86

subject: you are GETTING that record deal

Hey,

Your demo CD just came in the mail — and, Connor as my witness, I’ve already listened to it five times!!! 

It’s amazing. You’re amazing. The label would totally lose out if they didn’t sign you. 

Things have been pretty chaotic around here, with the summer term happening soon. Speaking of which: are you coming back? Chiron gave me the list of returning campers and counsellors this morning and said he hadn’t heard from you, so I thought I’d ask. I know you’ll be busy with the band, but if you get the chance, it’d be really great to see you.

Anyways, I’m leading the next Shield & Sword session, so I’d better go. Talk soon ;)

- L

FOUR YEARS LATER

TURBULENT WATERS? ALT-ROCK BAND MIDNIGHT SIRENS HIT ROUGH PATCH AFTER LEAD GUITARIST GETS INTO VIOLENT ALTERCATION 

the cover is the nail in the coffin: a blurry picture of you, an electric blue guitar forgotten at your feet, lunging forward into a crowd, with your bandmates on stage behind you in shock. 

you’d gone all this time without any major incidents, and one stupid chimera managed to burn down everything you worked for in one fell swoop.

“that’d be $8.50,” the cashier informs. 

you tear your attention away from the magazine, instead fishing through your pocket for some change. meanwhile, the cashier furrows their brow, leans down slightly to get a better look at you underneath your sunglasses and baseball cap. 

“hey, do i know you?”

“nope,” you say instantly, slapping a $10 bill onto the counter. “keep the change.” you gather your pile of necessary roadtrip supplies (slushies, m&m’s, and goldfish) before rushing out the door, your half-brother trailing behind you.

you slide into the driver’s seat, set each slushie in a cup holder, and hand the rest to percy once he’s slipped into the passenger side. 

“seatbelt,” you remind him. you shake your hair out after removing your baseball cap disguise. “i promised your mom i’d be responsible.” 

percy does as he’s told, though not without mumbling about how he’s practically an adult and a demigod who’s been in much more dangerous situations than a car ride up to long island. you just tell him to put on some music, even though he has a point. he’ll be 18 in august and you’re only five years older, but the fact is that you gave sally jackson your word. 

plus — you’re his older sibling, so gods forbid you let him get hurt. a seatbelt seems like a band-aid solution for one of the most powerful demigods out there, but still.

percy flips through a few radio stations while he sips his blue raspberry slushie. when he doesn’t find anything good, he opens the glove compartment and surveys your music collection before sliding a cd into the stereo. 

instantly, the familiar sound of david bowie’s voice eases the tension in your shoulders.

“good choice?” 

you nod and percy smiles triumphantly. you reach over to steal a few goldfish from the bag he just opened and ruffle his hair playfully, for good measure. 

you’re perfectly happy, driving along a long island highway while getting lost in the glam rock world of ziggy stardust, but it isn’t long until percy interrupts: 

“are you finally gonna tell me what happened, or do i have to read it from some trashy gossip magazine like everyone else?”

“well, your dyslexic ass can barely read so….”

you look over at him briefly, and laugh when you see him stick his slightly-blue tongue out to you. 

“at least my dyslexic ass is actually decent at ancient greek. luke told me you failed the reading test, like, a million times.”

your heart twinges at the mention of your old friend. 

friend.

if you could still call him that. 

thankfully, percy doesn’t give you much room to dwell on the past, too focused on your drama-filled present.

“so, what is it? you got kicked out of the band? lost everything? have nowhere else to go?”

you roll your eyes at his dramatics. “i did not get kicked out.” 

“then, what happened?”

“just the usual.” you shrug. “monster attack, mortals who can’t see through the mist. i tried to explain it away after — something about how i saw someone in the crowd attack another person and i stepped in to help. most people bought it, but the media loves drama and the label’s worried i’m a flight risk now. apparently, everything will blow over if i just keep a low profile for the next few months. so….no. i didn’t lose everything.” you take a deep, like when anyone other than children of poseidon are about to go underwater and they’re not quite sure when they can come up for air. 

“i just don’t really have anywhere else to go,” you finish.

“damn.” percy offers you a blue shark gummy (or whale - you and percy had already debated the shape of the candy that sally packed for the trip, and the jury’s still out). you gratefully accept. “well, i know it’s not the best reason, but i’m excited to spend the summer together.”

despite everything, you find yourself smiling. 

“me too, kid.” 

“it’d give me a chance to kick your ass in sword-fighting.”

“you wish!” you nudge his shoulder, both of you giggling. once the laughter’s died down, you glance at percy once more. “hey – did you tell anyone i was coming?”

percy shakes his head. “why?”

you take a long swig of your drink until you’re on the brink of brain freeze. 

“no reason.”

it’s just after lunch when you arrive at camp half-blood. 

you weren’t sure what you were expecting — maybe not some futuristic technological developments that had been discovered within the years you were gone, but definitely not for camp to look pretty much exactly the same as when you left. 

instantly, you find comfort in the familiar scenes: a dragon, peleus, guarding the magical borders; dryads and satyrs picking strawberries in the fields next to the forest; chiron standing near the central guidepost, greeting and guiding every camper in the right direction.

chiron smiles down at percy and practically does a double take when his eyes land on you.

“mx. l/n! it has been a while. are you here to drop off your brother, or do you plan on staying for the summer?”

before you can answer, someone appears behind him. 

“perce! hey!” 

“hey, luke.”

luke gives him a side hug, and percy shoves him away with a laugh when he ruffles his hair. it’s then that luke acknowledges you, though he looks like that’s the last thing he wants to do.

“i thought i’d never see you again. what are you doing here? ”

chiron turns to you expectedly. “i believe you have yet to answer that question of mine as well.”

“staying for the summer…” you adjust the shoulder strap of your backpack, uneased by luke’s cold demeanor. “i hope that’s okay.”

“of course!” chiron’s smile grows wide, eyes crinkling. “you’ll resume your position as head counsellor of cabin 3.”

“so i’m dethroned? just like that?” percy guffaws.

you nudge percy’s shoulder. “fulfill the next great prophecy, and then we’ll talk.” 

percy rolls his eyes playfully. luke, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to appreciate your tongue-in-cheek remark. his jaw tightens, and he suddenly finds a deep interest in the clipboard he’s holding.

chiron clears his throat, likely sensing the tension. “yes, well, i’m sure you remember how things work around here. if not, mr. castellan has been keeping this ship afloat. he's always here to help.”

“always.” luke smiles, but it’s elastic, threatening to snap at any moment. someone calls his name, and he walks away to deal with whatever chaos is waiting for him.

summer — age 15

you weren’t exactly conscious when you first arrived at camp half-blood. 

apparently, coach hedge, a satyr and protector, found you just in time and had to practically drag you up half-blood hill after a particularly gruesome fury attack. 

when you woke up and saw luke sleeping next to you in a chair, his curls overgrown and falling onto his eyes, you thought you had died and gone to elysium. 

you took in your unfamiliar surroundings. some sort of infirmary, with only your best friend next to you, the one you hadn’t seen in almost a year since you’d parted ways. 

then, you remembered what was happening before you passed out; it was more likely that you were being tricked into a false sense of security by that fury, who definitely planned on devouring you later.

with a newfound sense of urgency, you decided it was time to get out of there before it was too late. you were reaching for your knife when you felt a hand grab your shoulder. without losing a second, you twisted your body around, weapon at the ready.

whoever it was watching over you sure looked like luke. he was wearing a bright orange shirt and leather cord necklace with one clay bead. another point of difference was the jagged scar that cut across his left cheek.

“it’s just me,” he said, gently. “you’re fine here. you’re safe.”

you weren’t convinced, kept your knife in front of you to keep distance. “prove it.” you narrowed your eyes. “tell me something only luke would know.”

“you’re left-handed.”

“that’s a great observation,” you scoff.

“storm is your favourite x-men character.”

“that’s a very popular opinion.”

“your aunt would make us mango lassi after swim camp when she got home from work,” luke tries for the third time. “and, my mom - she used to call you ‘starfish.’”

your heart skipped a beat.

that was the confirmation you needed. 

the knife dropped from your hand, clattered on the wooden floor, as you pulled luke in for a hug. you were greeted by a familiar scent, that pear shampoo luke loved because it made his hair so soft, mixed with the smell of fresh pine trees. 

“it’s really you,” you mumbled into his shoulder.

despite sleeping for gods know how long, you were exhausted. you rested your weight into luke, but he didn’t seem to care.

“it’s really you. i thought i’d never see you again.”

“where are we?” you asked, breaking away to face luke. you ignored the wooziness you felt throughout your body; luke seemed to sense it, his grip around you tightening. “are annabeth and thalia here, too? how’d you get here?” your thumb traced the unfamiliar scar on his face. “what happened? are you okay —”

“i-i’ll answer all your questions, but you lost a lot of blood.” luke guided you to lay back down in bed. “we’ll explain everything. just get some rest.”

a third scenario entered your mind: this was all a dream. you’d close your eyes and when you opened them again, luke would be gone. you’d be alone again.

you couldn’t let go of luke’s hand, even as he tucked you back into bed. you tugged his wrist, silently urging him to join you.

“will you stay with me?” you finally croaked when he continued standing. 

luke looked at you, and you nodded once as final confirmation. then, he removed his shoes and slipped into the bed next to you. it was luke, all sweet pear and soft curls and strong heartbeat, and you held on to him in fear that he might slip away.

“always,” he whispered.

during the orientation video you were later shown, you learned that camp half-blood’s motto is keeping young heroes safe (mostly) for over three millennia!  

luke had used that word, too. safe.

chiron told you this was to be your new home as he walked you to the poseidon cabin. he told you that you were safe now, though you noticed how the word almost got caught in his throat. he gave you a sad smile you didn’t quite understand.

you did wonder, at first, if those words were true: this place, a home for you and other children of gods. somewhere safe.

and, well.

you came to understand chiron’s general melancholy a few weeks later, and every week after that. he was used to training and sending heroes off to their potential death, and you would be no different. stolen lightning bolts, deadly quests, cryptic prophecies. a pending war between divine forces you had been entangled with long before you knew. heartache and betrayal and loss beyond measure. 

but, there were other things, too. 

annabeth, fitting in perfectly at the athena cabin, continued being her genius self, leading her team to victory every capture the flag game. she was extra patient in helping you with ancient greek, especially after chiron had given up.

chris rodriguez, luke’s half-brother, would tell you jokes from across the dining pavilion, knowing that you hated sitting alone at the poseidon table. michael yew, son of apollo, taught you how to play guitar at the bonfire one week; you’d ask for more and more lessons until you could start playing on your own. charles beckendorf made you a celestial bronze sword that shone like that burst of light when the sun hits the ocean at sunset. it transformed into a ring that you would never take off, unless in battle. you might not have gotten along with mr. d, but you spent free time picking fresh strawberries with his son, castor. you made matching friendship bracelets with silena beauregard, who was really the only person you confided in, about how you maybe possibly felt something other than friendship when it came to luke. she told you about her crush on clarisse larue, the daughter of ares whom you would always partner with during sparring practice. you taught ethan nakamura, who didn’t have his own cabin as the child of nemesis, how to properly hold a sword. thalia’s tree stood tall at the top of the hill where you almost bled to death, protecting you and everyone inside the magical borders. you, annabeth, and luke would share a picnic there every thursday.

you had been on the run for so long, always looking over your shoulder for monsters, sleeping with one eye open to be one step ahead of death, jumping from one place to the next so quickly to avoid danger.

so, yes. 

it was nice to stay in one place, where you knew you were as safe as demigods could be. it was nice to spend your time learning and training and laughing instead of just surviving. 

it was nice to have a place to call home. and people to call it home with.

now 

the first week passes in the blink of an eye, and it’s like you never left.

tie-dye, volleyball, strawberry picking, kitchen duty, and cabin inspection. 

luke has everyone on a tight schedule — one, you notice, conveniently places the two of you at opposite ends of camp at all times.

still, you catch up with clarisse and the stoll brothers, spend time with annabeth and percy, say hi to pollux and katie gardner and others you vaguely recognize as five years older than what you remember. there are also a lot of faces you don’t recognize at all.

of course, you try not to think about the faces you wished you could see: friends you grew up with and would never have a laugh with again, younger campers you had trained who would never grow up. all lost because of the gods and the titans and a prophecy you never asked to be a part of. 

it’s a side effect of being back here; their ghosts are harder to ignore.

again — trying not to think about it.

anyways.

climbing wall, armory, sword-fighting practice, archery field, and free time on the beach.

to conclude: capture-the-flag, a friday night camp-half blood tradition.

you’re praising annabeth for her latest strategy that led to blue team victory when you notice luke. he was also on the blue team, but instead of celebrating with the rest of you, he’s speaking to someone who’s wearing a red helmet. they seem to be in a heated discussion, one that luke is not wanting to continue. his tells are the same, after all these years: the impatient tapping of his foot, his eyes searching for an out.

you give it to him.

“sorry, i need to borrow this guy.” you say, grabbing luke’s wrist. “camp emergency.” 

if the person said anything, you didn’t hear it, because you were already dragging luke away from the crowd, towards the armory shed. 

“what’s the emergency?” luke wonders, brows furrowed in concern. he has deep shadows under his eyes, too. keeping the ship that is camp half-blood afloat has clearly taken a toll on him. 

“you wanting to get out of that conversation. you’re welcome.” you wink at him; luke flushes, and you’re not sure if it’s because he’s annoyed, or if he's just flustered. “so, are you gonna keep ignoring me the whole summer?”

you put your helmet on one of the shelves and turn back to luke. you expected him to start removing his armor as well, but he doesn’t. he just glares at you, arms crossed over his chest.

so, he’s annoyed, then. 

“what do you expect?” luke hisses. “you can’t come back here and pretend that everything can be like it was when we were kids. things are different now, especially between us.”

you decide to take him up on his challenge. 

“oh? tell me, luke, what exactly is different between us?”

luke shakes his head in disbelief. you remove your chest plate, and that’s when the tattoo on your waist becomes visible. it’s a magnolia, like one of the flowers that bloomed on the tree outside may castellan’s house. 

something in luke softens, then. he sighs. 

“you could have at least given me a warning.”

he storms off, and you’re left half-armored, wondering what he meant by that.

you figure it out once a few of you settle down for a late-night, underground poker game, and you’re trying not to stare at luke’s hands.

it starts with you telling yourself that you’re just trying to predict what cards he’s holding, figure out if he’s bluffing, and if he’s about to lose everything he’d so confidently bet on. 

but then you notice the silver thumb ring that thalia got him for his 17th birthday. you notice an array of hair ties and elastic bands he keeps just in case a camper needs them, and woven bracelets given to him by his admirers. you notice how the tattoo on his wrist is covered. (it’s hidden well, but you know it’s there — you’d gotten one of a wing, the kind that might be found on a pair of magical red converse, at the same time)

you also notice the forest green painted on luke’s nails, the same shade worn by the person beside him.

van, the new head counsellor of the hephaestus cabin. you’d seen them at staff meetings, but you somehow did not notice that they were dating luke. 

he moved on — is that why luke needed a warning? is that what's changed between you?

it’s fine. whatever. so what if luke has a new partner? it’s not like the two of you were anything, officially. 

luke has a new partner. they’re wearing matching nail polish. they’re one of those couples.

well, van is also wearing a nickleback shirt and luke hates nickleback, unless that fundamental part of his personality changed, too. 

“yo, sailor neptune. you in or not?” travis brings you out of your daze, by using a nickname luke once called you.

back before becoming heroes, when you and luke were just kids, you’d watch cartoons in his living room on saturday mornings — x-men, she-ra: princess of power, teenage mutant ninja turtles, sailor moon. a lifetime ago.

you look around the table and see that everyone has been waiting for you to take your turn. even luke raises an eyebrow at you.

“yeah.” you clear your throat and throw some chips into the centre. “i’m in.”

you have decent enough cards to keep you in the game, and you’re comfortable that you can play the odds in your favor. the stoll brothers are good liars, you know that, and so is luke. malcolm pace is good at strategy, but thankfully not as good as his half-sister annabeth. pollux, who had invited you to the game, already folded along with butch, the son of iris who has a rainbow tattoo on his bicep to prove it. beside you, lou ellen, daughter of the hecate, contemplates her next move. clovis has fallen asleep, true to their title as head counsellor of the hypnos cabin. you can’t get a read on van, but they keep raising the stakes so confidently, and you’ve always liked a good challenge.

soon enough, it’s only you and van in the bet. when it comes time to reveal your cards, you curse yourself for overplaying your hand.

“good game,” van says to you as they collect their winnings. “you really had me going there.” 

“yeah.” your smile is strained, but it’s there nonetheless. “tried my best.”

“guess the curse of achilles doesn’t help as much in poker as it does in capture the flag.” 

“excuse me?” you raise an eyebrow.

luke, who had one arm casually draped around van’s chair the entire game, pulls away. “van, maybe don’t —”

“it’s not like it’s a secret, luke. they’re the prophecy kid, everyone knows they bathed in the river styx to be able to fight kronos. it’s camp legend.”

other than you, luke, and van, everyone else is occupied with something else. connor busies himself shuffling the cards, while lou ellen, malcolm, and pollux get up for more drinks. it seems like butch and travis have their own bet going to see who can balance the most chips on clovis’ forehead without waking him up. 

van waits for an answer. you’re a little queasy, and it’s not from the wine pollux managed to snag from his dad’s office. you’re suddenly faced with the reality that your life is reduced to a legend. you try your best to swallow that feeling, of being made into a greek tragic hero while your heart is still beating, and your life is still a mess.

“that’s relevant, why?”

“just that some people might consider the invulnerability thing an unfair advantage in physical competitions like capture the flag,” van explains. “increased strength and all that.” 

“that would mean nothing without a good strategy,” you counter.

“that’s what i said,” luke grumbles. 

you recognize van now as the person luke was arguing with earlier. it must have been about this. 

about you. 

“okay, y’all were best friends, so luke is obviously going to take your side.”

you’re not sure what stings more: friends or were. 

“although, he never really talks about you, which is weird because you’re, like, famous in and outside camp.”

ouch. that definitely stings the most. luke winces slightly, almost like he feels it, too.

“alright, alright,” connor interjects, shuffling the cards in his hands. “another round?” 

you’re the only one who decides to call it a night. everyone says goodbye; even van, who’s blissfully unaware of the effect their words had on you. luke avoids your gaze. the game continues without you.

percy’s snoring provides enough cover as you sneak into your shared cabin. you try to sleep, but it doesn’t come easy. 

you feel the spot underneath your rib, the one spot you’re truly vulnerable, ache.

summer — age 17

for the first time in your life, you couldn’t breathe underwater. you were swimming in acid, and your skin was melting away.

at least, that’s what it felt like to bathe in the river styx. achilles could have mentioned that, but all he gave was a cryptic warning about anchoring yourself to what makes you mortal.

you really tried at first. you thought about your friends at camp. you thought about percy, about your aunt back when she was still around. you even thought about may castellan, burnt cookies and saturday mornings.

the pain was too much, though. 

you were forgetting where you were, who you were. with every passing second, you were dissolving into nothing.

“if you wanted to go for a swim, you should have told me. i would have worn my swimsuit.”

luke’s voice echoed across the waves. you tilted your head up to see him sitting on the dock above you, his feet dangling into the water. he had rolled up his jeans to just above his ankles so they didn’t get wet, but his shoes were still on, which was a bit strange. the sun made his eyes look like burnt amber, his teeth sparkling as he smiled at you. 

okay. cool.

you were at camp. it was mid-afternoon, free period. the two of you had been at the edge of the lake, until you became impatient and jumped in, fully clothed. behind him, you could see that annabeth, thalia, and percy were waiting for you on the shore. they were each wearing orange camp shirts, which was also strange; you couldn’t remember a time when you were all there together, as campers.

“we better go, sailor,” luke said, amusement laced throughout his words. “come on. those cabins aren’t gonna inspect themselves.”

luke extended his hand to you. when you hesitated, he added:

“i can’t do this without you. will you stay with me?”

you reached up and grabbed luke’s hand.

always.

you emerged from the water, catching your breath as you collapsed on the sand. 

“oh gods. are you okay?”

your cousin, nico diangelo, son of hades, knelt down next to you. he tried to check your pulse, but you waved him away. your eyes searched for luke, but he wasn’t there, despite feeling the ghost of his hand in your own. 

oh.

you weren’t at camp; you were in the underworld. it was nico’s idea for you to take on the curse of achilles so that you’d be strong enough to face kronos. 

“did it work?”

you got up, a bit uneasy on your feet at first. nico helped steady you, his hands cold on your skin.

you felt….stronger wasn’t the right word. you felt adrenaline coursing through your veins, like you could swim across the biggest ocean without pausing once. like you could defeat an entire army and not break a sweat. maybe even take down a titan or two while you're at it.

you needed to see luke again, to meet him and the others in manhattan before it was too late.

“let’s hope so.”

now

you always loved mornings at camp half-blood. the beach was particularly beautiful at sunrise, the water peaceful.

the morning after that impromptu poker game, you need that peacefulness to wash over you. you’re awake after a rather sleepless night, deciding to go for a quick run before breakfast. you get dressed and grab your mp3 player, as quietly as you can to avoid waking up percy (who, truthfully, could probably sleep through a hurricane anyways). 

you jog from one end of the beach to the other. you set a steady rhythm, somewhere between the beat of your music and the sound of waves gently washing over the shore. when you make your way back down to where you started, you notice someone sitting nearby.

luke doesn’t say anything when you first sit next to him. he’s wearing a dark blue hoodie over his usual orange shirt, a cigarette tucked behind his ear. you imagine that he confiscated it from a camper on the way here. 

“morning,” he finally whispers, eyes fixed towards the ocean. 

you shiver, and not just from the cool morning air. you’re reminded of the last time luke spoke to you so softly, the last time you’d caught an early morning sunrise together. such a contrast to where you are now.

“morning,” you finally reply. 

as the sound of waves fills the silence between you, luke surprises you by taking a lighter out of his pocket. he lights the cigarette and takes a puff. then, he hands it to you. 

it’s such an odd, though not unwelcomed, gesture. a peace offering, you figure, but it’s just so not luke that you can’t help yourself.

“is golden boy luke castellan, offering me contraband? what planet am i on?”

the hint of a smile creeps onto his face. “like i said: things are different now,” he echoes his words from the night before, but this time you don’t sense any hostility.

you take a drag of the cigarette. your fingers brush against his when you return it to him.

you decide to offer a peace offering as well, and present to him one of your earbuds — he accepts. you have to slide across the sand to move closer to him, but he doesn’t seem to mind. 

i’m feelin’ rough, i’m feeling raw / i’m in the prime of my life….

as the song plays, you glance to see luke nodding along, tapping a finger on his knee to the beat. he lets the cigarette smoulder in his other hand.

we’re fated to pretend / to pretend / yeah, yeah, yeah….

when the song is over, luke turns to you. 

“new group?” he brings the cigarette to his lips, then gives it back to you.

“kinda.” you inhale, letting the smoke warm your lungs before explaining. “this is considered they’re breakthrough album. they’re from connecticut, actually.”

“oh, yeah? guess that’s where all the talent is from.”

luke bumps his shoulder against yours knowingly. you feel your cheeks heat up at his praise, his witty sincerity.

this is familiar — you and luke, at the beach, sharing music. it’s familiar, and for a few moments, you can act like there isn’t a wall between you, of unresolved feelings and harsh words. you can pretend that nothing has changed.

“you know, nickleback are from connecticut, too. which means you just called them talented.”

luke coughs on some smoke as he exhales with a laugh. “what? no i didn’t!”

“in a roundabout way. i always knew you were an undercover fan,” you tease.

“i have better taste than that.”

“do you?”

“you’re fucking with me,” luke deadpans.

you crack a smile. “yeah, i’m fucking with you.”

“gods, you scared me for a second,” he laughs, and you can’t help but follow. luke glances at you and the sunshine highlights his smile, his dark brown curls, the ever-changing color of his eyes. golden, radiant. 

you shiver again, looking away. before you know it, you feel something draped across your shoulders.

“i’m not sure van would like it if i was wearing your hoodie.” you joke, but your words are laced with a bitterness you hope luke doesn’t catch. unlucky for you, luke still knows you too well, whether he likes it or not.

“you don’t get to do that.”

“do what?”

luke scoffs. “be jealous.” 

“well, you don’t get to tell me how to feel.”

“so, you are jealous?”

you exhale sharply; you can practically feel the wall between you two reappear.

“it’s too early, lu. and i’m too hungover to deal with this.”

there’s nothing more left to say. you get up, throw his hoodie on the sand, and walk back towards your cabin, the beach and luke further away with every step you take.

it makes sense that way: you were always the one to leave first.

[yapihapi]

Part 1 || Part 2

“I’ll be 87, you’ll be 89 / I’ll still look at you like the stars that shine.”

Blue Lock

Michael Kaiser x Reader

Angst to Fluff

Note: All characters and events in this story are entirely fictional and not based on real people or events. Please be advised that this story includes themes of violence, abuse, strong language, and spoilers for the manga. Reader discretion is advised.

After years of waiting and searching for him every single day—in the park, the bakery, near his house, and around the neighborhood—I found nothing. Not a single hint or clue about where he might be. It felt like he vanished into thin air, disappearing like a bubble without leaving even the faintest trace.

I never got the chance to know if he was okay, if he was mad at me, or if I had done something wrong. I’ve spent so many sleepless nights wondering about him, especially knowing how his dad used to beat him. The thought of it made me sick with worry. I regret every single moment I didn’t ask, “How are you?” or “Are you okay?” He carried so much on his shoulders, and I didn’t do enough to lighten his burden.

It’s been eight years since we first met and four years since I last saw him. He’s 18 now, and I’m 16. I’ve tried to move forward, focusing on my studies and preparing for college. My dream has always been to study in Berlin, the capital, and I’ve worked tirelessly toward it. I told myself that if I couldn’t see him again, the least I could do was honor my dreams. Still, a part of me clung to the hope that I’d find him someday. I couldn’t forget him, not even for a moment.

One evening, I turned on the TV to take a break. By chance, the channel was airing a live soccer match. The team playing was Bastard München, one of the most renowned teams in the league. The energy of the crowd was electrifying, their cheers reverberating through the stadium. But as I watched, my attention was drawn to one player on the field.

A tall young man stood out among the others—his presence magnetic. He had blonde hair styled into a mullet with striking blue streaks at the ends, piercing blue eyes, and blue rose tattoos that climbed his neck, spiraling into thorny stems down his left arm, ending in a crown with a keyhole on his hand. He had a sharp look about him, accentuated by eyeliner, which gave him an air of confidence that seemed almost untouchable.

The entire game revolved around him. His teammates passed the ball to him like loyal subjects serving their emperor. He moved with precision and authority, as if the field was his kingdom. Then, as he approached the goal, the crowd’s cheers reached a crescendo. With a swift, powerful kick, he sent the ball flying.

“GOAL! And Kaiser uses his signature move, the ‘Kaiser Impact!’ What a phenomenal strike!” the commentator exclaimed, his voice filled with awe.

The game ended with Bastard München winning 4-2. My heart raced as I tried to process what I’d just seen. There was something achingly familiar about him. Compelled by curiosity, I searched for him online.

“Michael Kaiser…”

The name confirmed it. The articles, the photos—it was him. Mihya. The boy I had been searching for all these years. My Mihya.

As I read more, my heart swelled with pride. He had become everything he ever dreamed of. He was living his life to the fullest, chasing his passion and thriving. But a lingering question haunted me: Why had he left without saying goodbye?

It’s been twelve years since we first met and eight years since I last saw him. He’s 22 now, and I’m 20. Over the years, I kept up with his games, watching him from afar. But as much as I admired him, he felt more distant than ever. He was a global star now, with fans across the world, shipped with models and actresses, and surrounded by a life I could never touch.

In Berlin, I worked hard to make a life for myself. I loved it there—the opportunities, the people—but something always felt missing. A part of me, a piece of my heart, remained elsewhere, always longing.

When the school year ended, I returned to my hometown. My family greeted me with warmth, celebrating the end of the school year. It was wonderful to be home, but the ache in my chest persisted.

That night, unable to sleep, I wandered out of the house. My feet carried me to the park where so many of my childhood memories were made. Sitting on the swing, I let the memories flood back.

“it’s been eight years, huh?” I whispered to myself, my voice barely audible against the silence of the night. The words hung in the air, heavy with longing and regret. The rain began to fall, soft at first, then steadily growing heavier, each droplet a whisper from the past. I didn’t move. I let the rain soak me, its coldness seeping into my skin, grounding me in the present even as my mind drifted to the past.

The wind carried my words into the darkness, as if taking them to wherever he was. And as I sat there, the rain falling harder, I let the memories and the longing consume me. After all these years, I had hoped for closure—but deep down, I knew that a part of me would always wait for him, even in the pouring rain.

But then, the rain stopped—not entirely, but above me, it was dry. Confused, I looked up to see an umbrella shielding me from the downpour.

“Haven’t you learned your lesson, Sicky head?”

That voice. That nickname. My heart stopped.

When we were kids, I used to get sick often—always catching colds because I played in the rain or forgot to dry my hair. He used to scold me, teasingly calling me “Sicky head”.

Slowly, I turned around. My breath caught in my throat.

“Mihya…”

There he stood, Michael Kaiser, in the flesh.

“What? Are we just going to stare at each other all night?” he teased, his smirk so familiar it brought tears to my eyes.

Before I could stop myself, I leapt from the swing and threw my arms around him, the umbrella falling to the ground. But then I remembered—he hated being touched. I quickly pulled away, stammering an apology.

To my surprise, he grabbed me by the waist and pulled me close again.

“Not with you,” he murmured. “That doesn’t apply to you.”

“Do you… hate me or got tired of me?” I asked, my voice trembling as I looked away, tears silently streaming down my face. Thankfully, the rain masked them—or so I hoped.

“Stop crying,” he said softly, stepping closer and cupping my cheeks with his hands. His thumbs brushed against my wet skin, and his touch was both gentle and grounding. “And no, I would never hate you.” His voice was firm, filled with conviction.

“Then why…” I hesitated, my voice breaking. “Why did you leave me behind?”

He sighed deeply, his hands still cradling my face, as if afraid I’d disappear if he let go. “I would never leave you willingly. It’s just… things got complicated.” He looked down for a moment, then met my gaze again, his expression heavy with regret.

“I was accused of stealing in a jewelry store, and before I knew it, I got arrested.” he said, his voice carrying a mix of anger and frustration at the memory. “But when I was at the jail, someone offered me a way out—he said I had potential in playing soccer..”

He paused, his eyes searching mine for understanding. “He told me he’d heard about me fight back—against the police, against my father—all with just a soccer ball. So, I took the chance. I didn’t have a choice, but it meant leaving everything behind… including you.”

I felt a lump in my throat, the weight of his words sinking in. “All this time,” I whispered, my voice barely audible, “I thought you left me behind.”

“That’s bullshit,” he said firmly, his voice almost cracking. “Mihya would never do that, right?” He looked at me with a soft smile, trying to ease the heaviness in the air.

There was a comforting silence between us, the kind that didn’t need words. I looked into his eyes again, and for the first time in years, I felt the warmth and familiarity I thought I’d lost. His gaze was steady, full of reassurance and an unspoken promise.

As I studied his face, I realized how much he had changed. His features had become more mature, his jawline sharper, and the boyish softness was gone. His mullet, now longer with blue streaked ends, framed his face perfectly. Despite the changes, he was still Mihya—my Mihya.

“You’ve grown,” I said softly, unable to hide the awe in my voice. “But you’re still the same to me.”

He chuckled, shaking his head lightly as the rain continued to fall around us. “And you’re still the same too, always overthinking,” he teased, his voice laced with warmth.

Silence filled the air. It was comforting.

"I told you, you're the best," I said, breaking the silence. My voice firm but filled with affection as I looked into his eyes.

He gave a small, almost self-deprecating laugh. "You've always believed in me, haven't you?" he asked softly, his voice carrying a note of wonder. “You should’ve come to one of my matches,” he continued, his tone turning teasing. “I would have definitely seen you there.”

“How did you even know I wasn’t there?” I asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity.

“Because I always look for you,” he said, his voice softening but still carrying a playful edge. “Through every game, every goal, every crowd screaming my name—you were always the one I was looking and playing for. No matter how far I went, I always thought of you.”

I felt my cheeks heat up as I looked away. “You’re such an asshat,” I muttered, my voice trembling slightly. “I thought… I thought you didn’t want me to see you anymore. That’s why.”

His teasing demeanor faltered, and he let out a sigh. “I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.” He looked down for a moment before meeting my eyes again. “I actually come to this park twice a month, hoping I’d see you. I even went to your house, but they told me you weren’t there anymore.”

“Ah… yeah,” I said, fidgeting with the hem of my hoodie. “Well, my mom divorced my dad, and my grandma wanted us to live with her. We’re still in the neighborhood, though.”

His expression softened further as he nodded, taking in the details.

We fell into a natural rhythm, talking and catching up like no time had passed. We laughed over old memories, shared stories of the years apart, and danced together under the rain, letting the drops fall around us. It felt like we were in our own world—just us, the rain, and the echoes of our childhood.

“I missed this,” he murmured, his voice quiet but firm. He reached up, his hand brushing my cheek with a tenderness that made my heart ache. “I missed you.”

I smiled, my own hand hesitantly reaching up to rest against his. “I missed you too. Welcome back… Mihya.”

Mihya, my childhood best friend, the boy who had once been my entire world, was now the man who still held my heart in his hands. And as I looked into his eyes, filled with so much emotion, I knew I was still the girl who believed in him. The girl who never stopped cheering for him, even when the distance felt insurmountable.

Without a word, he leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead. The warmth of the gesture contrasted with the cold rain, and my cheeks flushed as he pulled away. His gaze dropped to my lips, and I saw a flicker of hesitation in his eyes.

“Can I?” he asked softly, his voice barely audible over the rain.

I nodded, unable to find my voice.

His hand on my cheek slid down to my neck, pulling me closer as his other arm encircled my waist. The world around us blurred, the rain continuing to fall as he closed the distance between us. His lips met mine, soft and tentative at first, then deeper, as if he was pouring all the years of longing into that single kiss.

It felt like time stopped, the rain a mere backdrop to the emotions surging between us. Every doubt, every question, and every unspoken word seemed to dissolve in that moment.

I didn’t even care if I’d wake up tomorrow with a fever or a cold. In that moment, nothing else mattered—the rain, the chill, or the consequences. All I could think about was the warmth of the memories flooding back and the joy of being here, now, with him.

The years had changed us, shaped us, and pulled us apart. But standing there, I realized that some bonds could never break. We were more than childhood friends. We were two halves of the same story, destined to find each other again, no matter how much time had passed.

I could feel it deep in my soul—our love, our bond, would never fade. It would grow with us. We would grow old together, like the stars in the sky, shining brighter with each passing year. And no matter what, I would always be his number one fan, cheering him on through every triumph, every challenge, every goal. And he would always be the one who held my heart, the one who truly knew me. The one I’d loved since we were kids. The one I’d continue to love for the rest of my life.

— Taglist!

@8x9d

— Author’s note!

Hi, everyone! I know this part is longer, but I hope it kept you hooked till the end. Thank you so much for the amazing support on the first part of this story—it truly motivates me to keep writing! I’ll do my best to stay active and bring more stories your way. Every reblog, like, and comment means so much to me and helps share this story with others who might enjoy it. I’d love to hear your thoughts, feedback, or anything that stood out to you. Thank you so much for taking the time to engage. <3

[everythingiloveblog]

I have so many things to complain about in ep10, that I have a hard time organizing my thoughts

Other than that, some things have been bothering me about Jack as a character, or rather the choices made for his character. Because they are definitely making some interesting (derogatory) choices with Jack’s character.

I love Jack, he is (was?) the character I’m interested in the most, but I’m starting to think that I will never get the depth(?) I thought I would get from him.

I was definitely on his side during ep7-8, defending him while people had a hard time understanding his point of view, or putting themselves in his shoes. But since ep10, like I said , some things have been bothering me.

One of them is that I noticed that Jack barely has any emotional bond with the characters in the show.

The show did it well with Joke though.

Joke & Grandma: they had so many emotional scenes of talking to each other & supporting each other & doing things for each other that I feel like, at this point, people care more about the bond between Joke & Grandma, than Jack & his own Grandma (or even Joke & Jack)

Joke & Hoy: Hoy has been on Joke’s side since episode 2 if I remember well, always feeling bad for him, understanding that if a rich kid like him is not going back home, there must be a reason, teaching him to drive, asking him his type, etc. And even in this last episode, he was comforting him at the hospital

Joke & Tattoo: Tattoo couldn’t care less about him at first, since he doesn’t like rich people and like, he doesn’t know him anyway. So he betrayed him twice, with barely any remorse, and if his mother had been on his side, he would have been gone with the necklace. But things didn’t go his way and Joke decided to forgive him TWICE, which led to Tattoo being thankful & remorseful. Since then, an emotional bond has been formed

Joke & Arun: well, they started as enemies (with the first group heist of the show), now they are in good terms. Not much going on between them but at the very least, Arun is now part of the 4 Little Pigs, so they are spending time together, getting drunk together & they did that heist together as well

Joke & Toi Ting : they don’t have that many scenes together, but I feel like they always give the big emotional speeches to Toi Ting to Joke (first in ep6 when she cried because she got bullied for being uneducated, and in ep10 twice after her dad left & when Joke was going to leave)

Joke & his father and brother : whether we like it or not, they clearly developed a story of love & forgiveness, etc (I don’t have much to say about this storyline as I don’t like it, but I understand that it’s a cultural thing, as most of the Thai bl I’ve watched did the same thing)

Even Boss & Nang had some interesting conversations with Joke in the show.

Now let’s look at Jack...well, I feel like everything is superficial

Jack & Save: who are they even to each other? They talked like 3 times, and it was nothing very noteworthy. He’s like this random lil bro that he’s close to, and we don’t know why, how or when they got close. So the betrayal feels a bit off, and the reveal was also underwhelming (to me at least)

Jack & Hope: once again, why the beef? No explanation. A few antagonistic interactions at the beginning, then nothing.

Jack & his grandma: we had some scenes, and of course they love and care about each other, but weirdly enough, their emotional bond feel weaker than the one she has with Joke...idk

Jack & Hoy & Tattoo: he was their debt collector, helping them because they couldn’t pay...and that’s it. He’s like the nice neighbourhood big bro. They like him, they respect him. But we don’t see much of it. They barely hang out with Jack. And when they do, Joke is always here. They are giving more Joke’s friends hanging out with Joke’s boyfriend tbh

Jack & Toi Ting: We know that she likes him, she was his eyes in the neighbourhood when he was working, I liked that scene with Jack, Toi Ting and her dad. But again very superficial. Like I said, the big emotional moments with Toi Ting are given to Joke and Jack is on the side so...

Jack & Arun: nothing to say I fear

Jack & Nang : does Jack even know that she exists? Oh yeah, she was at the table during his birthday dinner at Rosé's...does he know who she is?

Jack & Boss: probably one of his most developped relationship...and it’s an abusive one. Like I said in a previous post, Jack got emotionally manipulated by Boss during the 5 years he worked for him, and then ended up being verbally, physically and mentally abused by him, while being used as a pawn to Boss’s quest for power (after almost killing his grandma). All those scenes of Jack closing his fist while talking to Boss better not be for nothing

Jack & Rosé: Well, she liked him, he didn’t, he worked for her while being a potential spouse (forced by Boss). He ended up telling her that he didn’t like her but said they could remain friends...where was that friendship though. Nothing they shared was genuine though...so like idek (I wish there was an actual friendship formed between them actually but oh well)

Jack & his parents: Very surprised about the fact that he NEVER talks about them, ever. I actually thought that Oh (Jennie’s character) dying the same way as his parents would trigger him or something, but no. He thought about them briefly in ep4 (after Joke fixed his little bookshelf corner) but Grandma was the one bringing them up, saying that she misses them.

So...yeah. It’s disappointing really. I feel like there was so much more that could have been done with Jack’s character

And it also might be one of the reasons why it’s easier for the viewers to connect with Joke than with Jack

[jarofstyles]

Ultramarine- Indigo 7

Hello! Here is a cute part of Indigo, I'm sorry she's a slow burn but I really love them so I don't wanna rush them <3

Check out Patreon for early access to the next part and 150+ Exclusive writings

Indigo Masterlist

WC- 2.8k

Warnings- mention of trauma and bullying (brief) and sexual tension ;)

----------------

Y/N was grabbing lunch with him. 

Harry’s hand ached, the 5 hour session being particularly grueling regardless of how used his muscles were to the gun. He used arthritic cream on it and his wrist as he took a break in his office, finally checking his phone. As impressed as he was with the woman who had come and sat for 5 hours, he’d wished she wanted a break when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. H was giddy and anxious to see what Y/N was saying- she was the only one who texted him during the day besides Niall with stupid tiktok links and his Mum sending photos of her cats. 

When he’d opened it up to see her question, he didn’t hesitate to agree. It didn’t matter if he hurt, he wanted to take any excuse he could to see her. 

Y/N; Hiiii! I know this is super last minute so do not be afraid to say no but did you want to grab lunch at around 2:30? 

H: Absolutely I do. Sorry for the late reply, I was finishing a tattoo. It isn’t too late to say yes, is it? 

Y/N: Oh, amazing :) And no, not too late. I’m kind of bored today, I finished a project and told myself I needed to relax but… I feel restless and I missed you a little bit.

Harry felt himself flush at her response, knowing if anyone saw him at this moment they wouldn't recognize him. His smile was wide and face as pink as he collected himself, grateful that he was in his own office so he could freely feel. 

H: Only a little bit? X 

Y/N: Well if I said I missed you a lot I’d be a weirdo, wouldn't I? We just saw each other. 

H: Well call me a weirdo too then, I suppose. Because I did. 

H: A lot, if you couldn’t tell. 

Y/N: You are very cute. I’ll be there in a few :) 

—-

“Yeah, it’s kinda fucked.” Harry sighed as Y/N took his hand into her own from across the little table. “Usually I love a long session but I’ve been doing them a few days in a row. S’my own fault, but I was hoping for a tap out for once.” He laughed through his nose before it turned into a groan, feeling small thumbs begin to rub over his palm. Y/N pouted ever so lightly, moving in slow circles on the skin and digging in slightly before meeting his eye. 

“You’ve got to take care of yourself.” The scold was lighthearted but he could see it on her face. She meant it. It made his chest flutter a little that she cared enough to do that. He was used to basically being on his own, mostly by choice but because it was easy for people to fake concern to get gossip- but he knew Y/N meant it. Her gentle massage on his hand, trying to ease his aching was a nice touch. Her half-drunk smoothie was in front of her, leaving her fingers cool to the touch and another nice addition to the soothing touch. “Shouldn’t wait for them to tap out. You should schedule them in smaller increments so you don’t put too much strain on your poor hands.” Y/N’s eyes met him for a moment before looking away. “They’re too pretty to be hurting.”

He had been surprised by the gall, if he was honest. Y/N had been a bit more shy when coming to this sort of thing but he was mentally preening, not able to hide the smile curling on his lips as he flexed his hand in her grasp. “Yeah? Think I’ve got pretty hands?” He hummed. “Got a bunch of calluses. Some scars. My nail polish is chipped.” Was he fishing for a compliment? A little bit. He wanted a few of them, especially when she had seemed to like his best tools. 

“Of course. Just shows you work with your hands, know how to use them.” She stated. “It’s something a lot of people don’t know how to do anymore. The scars add character, and the nail polish is cute. It can always be redone.” She flipped his hand over but continued the slight massage, looking at his long, nimble fingers stretched over her wrists. He had a few rings on them which she knew he took off while tattooing, his fabric bracelets slightly worn besides the silver cuff on the non tattooed wrist. Harry liked to decorate his body and that was obvious. He’d told her he sometimes struggled with expression verbally, so she had a hunch that he used this to express himself. “And I also love the eyeliner thing. It’s attractive too.” 

She tacked on the compliment and his smile grew into a grin, shaking his head as he squeezed over her hands with a laugh. “Laying on all the compliments today, yeah? D’want something from me?” All she had to do was ask. The shivers in his body made him more than willing to hand shit over on a silver platter. His eyeliner had been a few years ongoing, a simple charcoal pencil smudging around his eyes. Apparently it brought out the green even more and he did have a few colors. Perhaps one day Y/N would want to do it for him. 

“No, no. Just figure people don’t do it as often as they should.” She sighed, dropping one of his hands to take a sip of her smoothie. The contact felt good. Especially since he kept a grip on her hand and swiped his thumb over the back of hers, the gentleness a stark contrast to the chain around his neck, metal on his face and ink on his skin. He was the opposite of what someone would expect, and somehow that made Y/N yearn for even more of him. 

“Well.. Thanks. But I’d prefer you to be the one doing the compliments. I know you’re not full of shit.” His smirk made her scoff but she merely continued sipping before moving on. Surely many people meant the compliments they gave him but she knew that he wouldn’t believe them regardless. That was the thing about growing up with that sort of trauma. When you were bullied growing up, seen as a butt of a joke, it was harder to accept people’s genuine kindness. It saddened her immensely, but this wasn’t the place to unpack that. 

“You’d have to be dead to not see how attractive you are, H. But I don’t want to give you too much of an ego boost or you’ll leave me in the dust.” Her foot nudged him under the table. “I wanted to ask if you wanted to come over this weekend? I was thinking of trying out a few cookie recipes and I need a baking assistant- or at the very least, a taste tester.” She offered, trying to hide her nerves. They were at a weird crossroads of developing relationships. Not official, not exactly fully comfortable enough to be shooting plans the day of but still craving their company quite strongly. They weren’t seeing anyone else, at least she hoped so, but they didn’t have a label. 

“Are you kidding?” He barked out a laugh. “Of fucking course I do. Used to help my nan back in the day in the kitchen. Christmas breads and sweets galore. You’ve got an old pro on your hands.” Was he vastly overvaluing his kitchen skills? A bit. He knew his way around decently enough, but he wanted to get that smile on her face- which succeeded. 

“Oh, lovely.” She chirped. “Then yes, I’d love for you to come over. We’ll get something to eat because m’not sure either of us are going to want to be in the kitchen for more than the cookies.” He watched her nose wrinkle making his heart skip a beat. There were tiny Y/N mannerisms he wanted to get to know. This one in particular he found to be stupidly cute, each time it happened making him smile internally. 

“Mhm. I understand. We’ve got a kitchen quota we don’t want to max out.”

—

“Where do you think you’re going?” A hand on her waist stopped her from taking another step further, Y/N grinning to herself as she paused in her step. She had done it just to see what Harry would do, and so far she had been correct. Her hopes had been granted. 

“Hm? Home.” She grinned up at him, eyes not able to hide the mischief in them as she moved back towards him. “Is there a problem?”

“I think we need to establish a few things.” His voice dropped, crowding her back against her car. Y/N had started this but felt the air get sucked from her lungs as her back pressed agaisnt the cold metal of her door, eyes widening slightly as she was peering up at him with far less smugness as before. “I don’t like leaving without a proper goodbye, hm? And you know what I’m missing, yeah Darling?” of course she did. She had been aching for it just as badly, the tiny one she got in greeting not even half of the one she needed now, but she wanted to make him work for it a little bit. 

“What’s that?” She hummed, biting her lower lip to try and control the grin threatening to break out on her face. The uncontrollable urge to giggle as he seemed to clock the look on her face, shaking his head at her and clicking his tongue while tilting her head up to meet him. It was the closest she could get to a swoon, sure there were little hearts in her pupils as he tapped the bottom of her lip and tugged it from her teeth. 

Christ. 

“I think you know.” He muttered. “Cruel, cruel little angel. What d’want from me, hm? Do you want me to beg?” His eyes scanned her face. “M’not one to get on my knees for that reason, but I think I could do so for you.” 

Y/N’s knees felt weak as he pinned her with his stare, a quivering in her stomach making her blink rapidly at him. Get on his knees? She could only imagine what he did on his knees and the image of him peering up at her with his mouth tucked between her thighs and her knee over his shoulder, working to get his tongue up inside her made her feel hot all over. The mental image was precisely his goal, she found, as his grin rose back and morphed into a smirk as she barely held back a whimper when her lip was stroked by the thumb in question. She had played with the lion as a sweet little lamb, and found herself right in his jaws. 

“N-No. Don’t have to beg, but I think it would be cute.” She cursed internally at the stutter, showing her weakness front and center as his face got a bit closer to hers, nose brushing the bridge of hers before moving down to the tip. Being this close made her dizzy, the sweet spice of his cologne and the mint of his gum overwhelming her. The man trapped her against her car, getting closer than she had been to a man in public, but she was pathetic. Internally she was gagging for it, tilting her head up to try and catch his mouth-

Only for him to pull back just enough to miss. A spark in his eye made her want to stomp her foot, the man teasing her more than she had anticipated. Y/N had tried to get the upper hand but it was obvious that the more comfortable he got, the more power he would wield with her. She had been a bit of a fool for thinking that a man like him wouldn’t turn this over, but she had felt like trying her luck. 

“Cute? Think it would be cute?” He muttered under his breath. “Well, I’m glad you think so. But I know what this is, little angel. Prettiest little Sunflower, trying to tease me.” Realistically, Harry knew she hadn’t a clue about the true power she had over him, but he would let that remain a secret for a bit longer. “What I meant, by a proper goodbye… Is that I’d like to feel these pretty lips before you leave me.” There was an audible hitch in her throat, making him hold back the smile, ghosting his lips against hers. “You did something to me… m’convinced. Put a spell in your lipgloss or somethin’ like that. Made me crave it. I’m more of a gentleman these days, because the first thing I wanted to do was lick into this pretty little mouth when I saw you today. I controlled it, but I can tell it’ll be a problem later on down the line. I need something sweet to hold me over, y’feel me, doll?” He tapped her lip with his thumb, gently tugging it down before it snapped back up. 

Y/N could barely breathe. Sometimes, she found, Harry had these bursts of being pure sex appeal. It was broken up by cute, soft and shy boy, but when he got in this sort of mood she found it hard to keep her vision from swimming. A floaty feeling, making her swallow thickly and nod in a jerking motion as she tried to get up on her tiptoes to catch his lips only to be deprived again. This time she did make a noise of frustration, brows furrowing as she looked at his hooded eyes. It wasn’t fair! 

“Oh, m’sorry Sunflower. Couldn’t let you have it that easy when you were about t’leave me without a kiss. Got a mean streak in you, but I’ll take it. You’re sweet and tart, like a Cherry.” He laughed, leading her arm to loop over his neck. “If you’re good to me, I’ll be good to you. Give you what you want, maybe even more.” She was rewarded, finally, with a tiny kiss to her pout before pulling back.  “But if you want to play games… You’ve gotta remember that m’a nasty competitor.”

Y/N could believe it. Harry oozed ‘win or nothing’ energy and she had tested it now, feeling how quickly she was going to fold. That didn’t mean she wasn’t going to test this out when she had more resolve, but she had felt similarly to him the whole time. She wanted him just as badly, and playing with fire wasn’t cutting it right now. The only burn she wanted from him was a big of beard burn between her thighs. “M’sorry.” She whispered. “I’ll be sweet.” 

“I heard a silent ‘for now’ after that, but that’s good enough for me.” He rewarded her heavily. Kissing her fully, capturing her lips between his own and pulling her into him as he did so. Harry kissed just how he looked. Intense, hot. She let out a little noise feeling his tongue brush past and the cool metal of his tongue piercing hit hers. It was another reminder of how he would definitely be one to blow her mind when he got on his knees for her, because Harry didn’t seem like the type to do anything half assed. He had the ability to make her feel like she was boiling inside and the only thing that could cool her down was his touch. 

It was over too quickly, her thighs clenching together hard as she looked at him with bleary eyes. His face was self assured, a little smug and she was trying to recover. A squeeze was given to her chin, making her clear her vision as she was left a little unsatisfied. But would she ever really be truly satisfied when he took away his mouth? She could kiss him for hours and still feel like she wanted more. Their date was proof of that. 

“See? I can be sweet when you are. Rewards.” His confidence blew her away, barely able to recover when he pressed another firm kiss to her mouth without giving her time to react. “Now go on and go get some supplies for our cookies, yeah? Text me when you’re there and when you’re home safe. I’ve got another two appointments.” He wished he could cancel them and just go with her but he didn’t want the rep, and also didn’t want to cling to her. As tempting as it may be, he wanted to start this right. 

Y/N’s kiss still tingled on his lips as she drove away. He knew he was deep in the inky indigo waters of infatuation, but he didn’t think that was a bad thing. He’d learn to breathe underwater.

[ryuichirou]

Aphrodisiac/womb tattoo HCs

So we had these two wonderful asks from two wonderful Anons…

Anonymous asked:

this is lowkey cursed and i’m sorry… but how would the twst boys act if they ingested an aphrodisiac??? like the sexy soup scene from danganrompa 2? (rip ortho lmao)

i love the content, thank you for doing these hcs for us all !!! :D 🖤🖤🖤

Anonymous asked:

I wanted to say that just like that other Anon the Idia womb tattoo comic lives rent free in my head. Any headcanons for how some other characters would react to having a womb tattoo/consequences of having one ;)

And I’ve been going back and forth thinking whether I should write these as two separate lists or not: despite these two technically being different prompts, the end result is somewhat similar… So I decided to combine them, but specify the possible changing elements as much as possible! I hope it’s okay with you.

I’ll also talk about both tops and bottoms because I have seen some djs in which the top gets the tattoo and it just manifests in an uncontrollable desire to impregnate someone lol And sexy soup doesn’t discriminate, so neither will we >:3

Thank you so much for your patience, your asks and for enjoying our stuff. Let’s dive in.

Riddle – he would be so helpless. If he knows for a fact that there is a culprit to this (i.e. Ace added something to his tea, or someone casted a spell that came out wrong), he’ll take their head off. Then he’ll try to fix himself with magic or some other potion, but he’ll just end up significantly enhancing the effect of the spell/potion somehow. He’ll try to go to infirmary next, but will collapse on the floor helpless and horny until someone picks him up… imagine trying to help out your strict and proper housewarden just to hear him whispering something uncharacteristically horny to your ear because his womb tattoo is so bright you can see it through his west/the aphrodisiac effect is so strong he is drooling.

Ace – his go-to would be to lock himself in their dorm room and start masturbating lol but it won’t help him because the aphrodisiac is strong/the womb tattoo won’t go away until he actually inseminates someone. In his perfect world this condition of his would be a secret, but he is loud af, so people will absolutely hear him yelling “why doesn’t it go away??” from the other room. Pray for any guy who walks on him trying to fix this thing himself: Ace is desperate, he doesn’t care who this is anymore…

Deuce – he’ll 100% try to isolate himself, and he’ll do a better job at keeping it a secret than Ace (completely terrified of the possibility of being made fun of)… at first. After he masturbates and touches himself down there 34 times (HOW MANY TIMES??), and realises that he just keeps teasing himself and feeling even worse, he’ll bite the bullet and go ask for help. He won’t go to Ace though, he’s more likely to ask a senpai if he knows how to fix this… maybe Trey. He is smart.

Trey – he’ll instantly figure out what this is, and pretty quickly realise that this is probably the result of some kitchen or lab accident… he’ll miraculously manage to conceal his boner for an entire day, trying to solve the mystery of how the fuck is he supposed to get rid of it if masturbating would only make it worse. Then he’ll begrudgingly accept the fact that he has to have sex for this to go away, start thinking about every possible “safe” candidate… and end up fucking Riddle, which is the least safe option out of all of them lol but he got way too horny by the end of the day.

Cater – he’ll lie about feeling unwell and hide in his room. Then he’ll try to google either the spell itself (he’ll only find doujins lol) or some ways to get rid of the aphrodisiac’s effect, but it wouldn’t help much because to do anything he would have to leave his bed. He’ll try sleeping it off, but then wake up in the middle of the night feeling worse than ever with his sheets completely wet and his dick hard and red. He’ll probably go out of his room and jump the first guy he sees, pushing him against the wall just so he doesn’t see who is touching him. He won’t remember much about it afterwards… was it a dream?

Leona – he doesn’t have time for this bullshit: the moment he notices something shiny under his belly button, he’ll know what to do. It is very humiliating, but you know what’s more humiliating? Suffering with this shit for an entire day. So he’ll just call Ruggie and demand for him to cum inside until the tattoo is “filled” and goes away. Or until he sweats off all the aphrodisiac juices…

Ruggie – to him it’s a huge bummer that messes with his plans a lot. He’ll try to power through this, but he won’t be able to. This is the first time in Ruggie’s life when he wants to have sex because of horniness and not because of the perks it would give him. He would start sniffing the other beastmen sneakily, thankfully, they wouldn’t expect anything shady from him… he’ll probably end up being saved by Leona though, who yoinked him at the very last moment before Ruggie tried to pounce on some huge dog guy. Being horny makes you stupid.

Jack – he’ll try very hard to tolerate and hide it, but he won’t be able to :( He’ll start pacing around, panting with his tongue out, drooling, sniffing everyone… not to mention, the bulge is huge and very obvious. Sometimes the tattoo would randomly get shinier and stronger, and Jack would barely hold back the urge to hump the closest thing next to him. At some point he’ll give up and go to the infirmary, but will see Deuce before he manages to. He’ll breed him for 4 hours.

Azul – he is way too proud to ask for help, he’ll hide in his room for an entire day and refuse to leave his desk lol it’s so obvious he is hiding something under the table. He’ll be so irritable for an entire day, he’ll snap at everyone to leave him alone and get back to work… He is very good with spells and potion, so he’ll also try to fix it himself, but will also make it significantly worse. His only option is to demand the Tweels to bring him Idia without explaining anything…

Floyd – he’ll try to fight it for like 30 minutes because he didn’t want to get a boner wtf. He has no shame, so he’ll show the tattoo to everyone and poke it a lot. But he’ll get tired of it pretty quickly; so while Azul and Jade were discussing what they could do to help Floyd out and whether they should collect his saliva to study the aphrodisiac, Floyd just went and fucked someone. What? He wanted to.

Jade – it's definitely an uncomfortable sensation and he’ll try to get rid of asap, but… maybe he could show it to Azul and politely ask for a day-off, just so Azul yells at him to go away and not come back until that thing is gone? Maybe he’ll do that. And then he’ll think about who he would like to fuck, since he has this perfect excuse of “oh I am sorry, I can’t quite control myself”. Who would be the most inconvenienced but would have the most interesting reactions? Much to think about on his day-off.

Kalim – come on now, is there any other possible scenario? Of course he’ll wake up with a fever and a huge boner, all sweaty and in agony, and Jamil will lose 10 years of his life worrying about someone poisoning Kalim. He’ll make him drink 30 antidotes, and none of them would work because this isn’t poison, it’s an aphrodisiac… or a womb tattoo, which isn’t much better. So of course he’ll end up jerking Kalim off, and then having sex with him because Kalim would get so clingy that it’ll become obvious that there is only one way to save his life. Jamil will believe that it was necessary to save Kalim’s life for his own sanity…

Jamil – did he catch it from Kalim?? Anyways, he is less likely to use Kalim for this lol And he’ll also figure out pretty quickly that neither potions nor spells would make him less horny. Despite not liking the scenario at all, he’ll start convincing himself that maybe if he uses snake whisper no one would ever know about what he did…and as he starts rationalising this, he’ll get hornier and hornier in anticipation. But Jamil wouldn’t be Jamil if things went as he planned, so he’ll end up stumbling upon Azul. In such state... Jamil has never felt like he was actively leaking before… is this the worst day of Jamil’s life? Or the best day of Azul’s?

Vil – see, in theory he wouldn’t have any problems at all: all he needs to do is to excuse himself, call for Rook and be done in 20 minutes, but Vil is just as unlucky as Jamil sometimes, so it will happen at the worst time possible. Was there something in his drink? Did someone curse him in a sneaky way? Anyways, being around a bunch of sweaty guys for an entire hour of PE in that state was horrible. He was hugging his stomach and trying to sit down as much as he could for this entire time, crossing his legs and feeling very hot in his clothes. At some point he felt like he undressed completely and made his state visible to everyone, but thankfully it was just a hallucination. That scared him so much that jumped Rook the moment he saw him after class.

Rook – now this is someone who will enjoy the feeling of eagerness and horniness lol He’ll get interested in how much his body could endure without stimulation at that state. He is used to waiting out until certain poisons effect wear off, but this one is special – it doesn’t, it only gets stronger! So yeah he did a very stupid thing by waiting out for 3 days because by the time it became impossible to tolerate, Rook became delirious. Whoever he’ll jump in this state will be in his bed for a day.

Epel – he would be so horribly embarrassed and wouldn’t want to tell, but he is way too obvious. He would wiggle on his chair, be restless, pant and moan quietly, grab his stomach randomly. He would also stare a lot, especially if this is during the Magift Practice. He would transform into a “head-empty bimbo” lol Now is he going to get loved by the entire Magift team or is Rook going to take him back to Pomefiore to look into what’s wrong with him? Who knows.

Idia – we already know what would happen to him lol I’ll just add that he is probably going to try out having sex with Ortho first, but since Ortho’s seed doesn’t fill the “tank” that is Idia’s womb tattoo, he’ll just fuck his brother in vain. At least he enjoyed it, right?~

Ortho – human!Ortho that is (sorry, Danganronpa references…). Honestly, I feel like he’ll just cling to Idia instantly lol He won’t even consider an option of trying out any other remedy. If he feels himself burning with desire down there, he’ll just jump Idia and act all cutely, maybe even whine a little about how Idia is the only one who can help him. But despite being all cute and whiny, he’ll say pretty cursed stuff about producing offsprings with his niichan while fucking him. Afterwards he just shrugs and says that he doesn’t remember saying that but… Idia would be so shocked though: he didn’t know so much cum could fit into his body. He is terrified to look down.

Lilia – he would sigh and say that he is he too old for this, and that he haven’t felt like that in 300 years. He is not as strongly affected as he would if he was a bit younger, but the spell still won’t go away until he does anything to it. So he’ll just fly to his boys, pull up his shirt and playfully ask about who is in the mood to help him out; visually he would be completely unfazed, even if his dick would bulge in an obscene manner. Then again, he might also try showing it to Idia first because they had a conversation about this thing one time, and Idia thought that Lilia was joking when he said that he had experienced the tattoo before…

Silver – he’ll try to tolerate it. This isn’t the first time he has to tolerate the feeling of horniness, even though it usually isn’t this extreme + the tattoo is troubling. If it doesn’t go away by the end of the day (and it won’t), he’s likely show it to Lilia, but even before Lilia says something about the tattoo, Silver’s body would react to him just being in the same room. Silver will drop his head on Lilia’s shoulder and moan quietly, shaking a lot. This would surprise Lilia, but it’s all good, he’ll help out~

Sebek – he’ll also try to tolerate it because he is another “If I keep ignoring it maybe it will go away” type. He can’t talk to anyone about this, he can’t be seen like this! But he is absolutely going to: the boy is way too obvious. Similarly to Jack, he’ll get very red and start panting, almost crawling instead of walking. Is he hiding his boner or is his body not listening to him anymore? Your guess is as good as mine. But he will be as helpless as he would be dangerous because it will take only about 40 minutes of trying to endure this for him to start jumping on people.

Malleus – now this one is trouble; technically he is the only person in NRC that is powerful enough to neutralise the womb tattoo all by himself + his dragon blood would probably filter out the aphrodisiac very quickly if he wanted to, but… would he want it? He’ll think about it for a couple of hours while wandering around abandoned buildings, and then the heat and pain would get too annoying, but the thought of responding to and fulfilling this growing desire would start sounding kind of good in his head. Whether it’s Lilia or Sebek, whoever he sees first, would have the absolute honour of making sure Malleus’ body is satisfied. Pray for both of them because Malleus’ demands are insane: for the aphrodisiac to dissipate or the womb tattoo to be filled, it would take him 5 times the time that is usually necessary. He could even prolong it if he enjoyed it too much and didn’t want it to end. Technically. Not saying he is going to.

[acesluvrxx]

waiting for aces bday

i love love love love ace likeeee yall js dont fw ace like i do BRUHHHHHHH

anyways!! random essay about MY man bcus i love him and its 2:30 am and im on my period ..

i love you portgas d. ace. i’ve found comfort in you during the hardest moments of my life. you’ve always been there for me. i love everything about you. i cherish everything about you. your questionable choices, your admirable ambition about achieving your goals, your smile, your freckles, your dimples, your hat, the smileys on your hat as well as the red beads, your two belts, your compass watch, your bracelet that looks like a candy cane, that little blue latch on bag around your knee, the thing on ur elbow (what is that) your tattoos your silly little black boots that i wish were at my doorstep already ughhhh literally everythinggg ur so perfect

he’s just so important to me! like i actually cry over him everyday! like right now! im sitting on my bed listening to “boy is mine” by brandy & monica whisper-shouting the lyrics while pointing to my ace shrine! and wishing he was here to comfort me while these cramps make me want to jump!

i want his hands in mine, i want to do that cute thing where we compare hand sizes and have banter like “your hand is so big ace” and he’d be like “nah, yours are just small” ARGHHHH MY HEARTTT I CANT and they’d be all freckled and calloused but still warm bcus hes fireeeeeeeeeeee

why am i lowk spasming ugh I LOVE ACE i love all his outfits too !

and dont even get me started on him as a character like he deserved the best out of the world and js. WHEN I CATCH U ODA. i will defend ace with my life if anyone tries to play w me about him.

like wym he was born to die? no? hes safe at home with me and our 312 babies and one cat? marineford was filler. blackbeard is in hell. so is akainu.

its just. the way words literally can not describe how i feel towards this man like he is the most perfect, finest, handsomest, hottest, charming, fiery, hot-headed, polite, respectful, softie, caring, protective man ever i do not care if its greasy ace, wano ace, older ace, manga ace, treasure cruise ace, horribly 3d animated ace, or boichi ace i see any kind of ace and i’m on my knees begging with my mouth wide open or bent over and legs spread like please baby i can take all of it rough or gentle however you want it i will comply but at the same time i’m so genuinely in love with him like ace altered my brain chemistry because i physically can not find any other man fine.. because they can’t be !! ace IS perfect !! he’s so respectful and fine!! and like bro? his voice is so pretty? he is so slay? like he took out five marine ships with one fire fist? his va also just casually cooks food for the rest of the cast? is there something ace can’t do fr like.. AND OMG I COULD YAP ABOUT HIS PRETTY, SINCERE SMILE ALLL DAYYYY ITS SOOO CUTEE LIKE PLEASEE I BOUGHT THE RING TOO JUST PROPOSE BAE IF U DONT I WILL its so sweet and pretty he’s smiling at me all day i’m smiling back and crying WAHHHHHHHW9HUEHGAEIRHGIUGIDFIGHDIFHIDFHBIRJEGODIBGDKGJD LISTENING TO HIS SONG ON LOOP LIKE BAE?? U SAVED MY HEART?? i just want to cuddle him and hug him and hold him and kiss him and make him feel better about himself bc garp is a bitch?? so is akainu?? everyone’s a bitch except luffy, whitebeard, and sabo pretty much HE DOES NOT DESERVE TO BE HATED ON JUST FOR LIVING LIKE ROGER YO BITCH ASS DID NOT HAVE TO NEGLECT YO CHILD AND PUT THE BURDEN OF BEING YO SON ON HIM SINCE THE MOMENT HE WAS BORN??

i will tell him he’s pretty and that he deserves to be alive and that he’s worth it and whoever shits on him is a piece of shit who don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about !! i want to be there for him and take him on dates and make him happy !! ill become a housewife bae i already got the apron on !! ill cook yo fave food, bathe u, bathe with you, do all of ur hobbies with u, sleep with u like anytime u fall asleep on me or anywhere? bae i have a blanket prepared ill tuck u in make sure u have a good sleep kiss u goodnight every night and tell u how much i love u even if its annoying ace u are my everything idk what to do bc i will not accept anyone else into my life atp.. ace ur my man my only man

i luv u portgas d ace

goodnight every1

[unlikelysaintdelele]

some interesting things i've noted during my ACOTAR reread Pt. 2

*SPOILER WARNING for those who haven’t completed the series*

I finished ACOTAR a few weeks ago but I haven't gotten the chance to transfer my notes until now. Once again, names have been color-coded!

Feyre couldn’t keep her mouth shut only around Rhys. It’s almost like her true self comes out around him.

Anytime Feyre calls on some strength, the image of Nesta comes to mind. She sees Nesta as strong and admires her for that.

A queen without a throne

Are tattooed bargains a night court specialty? I was listening through the graphic audio, as a reminder, so some things slip through.

Pearls in Nesta’s hair. It makes me think of the pearl jewelry Elain later receives from Lucien. I think pearl is meant to represent luxury, and it seems to complement their features.

Elain is the only one with their father’s eyes and I always found it interesting. How similar is Elain to her father? Her father favored her, but I think that’s only because Nesta was cold and Feyre was busy.

Warrior beast vs half-wild beast, Tamlin and Feyre bonding for being unrefined (Disney Beauty and the Beast reference?)

“Don’t ever disobey me again” is honestly not the vibe, Tictac.

I don’t like knowing Tamlin’s anger is on a tight leash with Feyre. He’s angry at her. It feels overprotective in such a suffocating way.

“There you are, I’ve been looking for you.” SOB

The most beautiful man she’s ever seen

Blue eyes so deep they were violet

They just stared at each other! As if in a daze! 

Night pressed in closer around him, smiling

Molded from the night itself, star-kissed night

I have a random “until dawn” note… idk

Cauldron boil me (double, double, toil and trouble… sorry, random silly thought)

Elain began learning to grow veggies! Reminder, the soil at the cottage was crap, it couldn't sustain the veggies. Elain could barely grow flowers. People keep forgetting that Feyre was their only access to nourishment because there was no other choice. Sweet Elain gets so much hate for not using her gardening skills to help, but it was set up so that she couldn't.

Nesta’s iron-will allowed her to resist glamour! I want more on Nesta’s strength. This is one of many reasons why I’ve been a Nesta stan since day one. I know she was cruel but we’re told why in book one. She wanted her father to do something, anything: be a father and care for them. I’m not saying it was any excuse to be cruel, but they were in a shitty situation and she showed her love for her family in other ways. Being willing to lay down her life for Elain? Going after Feyre even knowing it was risky? Asking to be taught to paint? She loves her sisters, she just shows it differently.

Heart of Stone was mentioned for a second time! hehe

Wyyyyyyyyrrrrmmmmmm. I’m a fan of giant worms (Dune, Star Wars). Fun fact about me: I went through a short phase where I just kept writing about worms.

Feyre deems Elain as stronger for being hopeful. She sees so much strength in her sisters and admires them for their differences.

Love Nesta! More Nesta love. She wondered what a woman might do with a fortune and a name. She wanted to travel! She wanted that independence! Pre-war Nesta hurts to experience. She’s opening up now that she’s safe socioeconomically and physically. It makes me wonder what else would have begun to heal if she got more of that peace and security.

Rhys: because I’m tired and lonely. The things he does and willingly puts himself through to protect his court and anyone else he can spare. Love his complexity.

(apparently there's a character limit for each block of text so here's a lil divider)

Honestly? I was vibing with the Tamlin romance, it was chill. The bite was nice. UNTIL Rhys appeared. Timtam just seems so stale in comparison. The chemistry is immediate between Rhys and Feyre, the tension is palpable. I’m still not over how Feyre chose Tampon over Lucien. why would I pick someone so clumsy with affection and who isn’t around nearly as much as the sassy redhead who bickers with me like an old friend? Rhys > Lucien > Tamlin is the order at the moment, and the order will stay until I have to consider the other boys (wait for me batboys).

Tamlin’s dad was Amarantha’s friend! They fought together in the war. Rhys’ father killed Tamlin’s, so Amarantha took Rhys in as a lover as punishment. Amarantha is so greedy honestly, and it's so gross. She wants Tamlin and Rhys but the only reason Tamlin hasn’t been forced like Rhys is that she wants to be chosen, she wants him to come to her willingly

Even in their last moments together, Rhys and Feyre are honest with each other. Honest in a way I've never seen her with Tamlin.

Very excited to begin ACOMAF, my fave book of the series.

[velarisdusk]

Our favorite Azriel stan 🦇🖤💙 !!

1. Why is Azriel one of your favorite characters?

2. Is there a specific scene that made you like them?

3. What theories/headcanons do you have for Azriel?

4. Feel free to share anything else about Azriel that the questions didn’t cover!

omg i wasn't expecting such a title, what an honor. i’d like to thank the academy, azriel, beyonce

putting this under the cut bc i just realized how much i wrote lol

i always love the characters that don’t talk much and aren’t super expanded on by the author (this isnt me saying he lacks depth, i just need an azriel book). ig partially bc of more room for headcanons/fanon exploration, but mostly bc it’s like…. omg so mysterious let me learn more abt you bbg 🫦 az is so broody and witty and i love that abt him

im gonna be so real i fell in love with him (and cass) from that first dinner at the house of wind. like i said, very quiet, very witty, lots of small but telling facial reactions. i was REALLY hooked, though, later on at the “i don’t see you spouting poetry, brother” “i don’t need to resort to it” AND IM PRETTY SURE HE WAS LIKE LEANING AGAINST THE WALL OR SOMETHING ARMS CROSSED WITH A LITTLE SMIRK LIKE STOP THATS ENOUGH I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE i know its such a basic and very brought up bit of dialogue but UGH i literally squealed and kicked my legs for feyre bc god i WISH i couldve witnessed that with my own eyeballs

buckle up, i’ve got a good few. azriel: ♡ is left-handed. i wont be taking any questions. ♡ is a switch, but ive been on my sub!azriel soapbox for months now, and i'm not getting off anytime soon. sub top sub bottom idc, sub azriel for president ♡ if only he was born in the right place and the right time, he would LOVE rock music. i think where cass is more classic rock (i'll die on this hill), az is more punk rock, alt rock, garage rock, grunge if he's feeling a lil crazy. oh but i bet he loves classical music. ♡ at one point he tried to learn piano bc he wanted to play a piece he heard at one of those hewn city balls :) but he realized very quickly how difficult it would be what with the chronic pain in his hands and all :( ♡ there was one night in particular, he was alone at the house of wind practicing, and he got so frustrated after messing up the same measure for the millionth time. staring down at the keys - no, at his hands, his fingers... he slammed the keylid down on them over and over in a moment of rage ♡ when the IC asked why his fingers were wrapped, he'd told them he just trained too hard ♡ but he didn't stop playing. i like to think he plays in private. plays and sings for the shadows. and it's always beautiful ♡ he's got a soft spot for animals. specifically birds.. like owls and falcons i think. ♡ i also feel like he's got pre-mission rituals. like he's gotta sharpen his blades in a specific order, checks his gear once, twice, three times. reflects in front of the mirror for a few minutes, then heads out. i feel like it borders on compulsive. like he feels that if he deviates from it even slightly, something will go wrong with the mission. ♡ REALLY good with kids. they just gravitate toward him. he'll let them play with his shadows, shapes them into little animals too UGH uncle az with nyx is so :") ♡ has a small, hidden tattoo that means a lot to him and no one else knows about it. yes, he did it on himself. no, he isn't showing anyone except his mate. ♡ OH ALSO i feel like hes really good at dancing. like cmon he sneaks around all the time hes gotta be very nimble and quick on his feet. qualities of a good dancer. put him in a dance with nesta lets see THAT i have a lot of thoughts on azriel my bad

i love him

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - A New Entry My Top 10 BLs of All Time

March 2023 Wk 4

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Bed Friend (Sat YT, GaGa & iQIYI uncut) ep 7 of 10 - the plot remains much the same and I am getting very concerned they extended this one as it’s starting to flag. Might have been my first high heat 10/10 candidate if they had kept it at 8 eps. Bummer. I mean it’s still good and I’m still enjoying it, but... character development is a thing.  

Future (Thai Sun YouTube & Gaga) ep 2 of 5 - Drunken gathering is such a hallmark of this franchise. Tiny bit of James flirting! (He’s my fav character ever since Love Mechanics original and the punch). Fuse is right to be worried about getting drunk bc he wants to be able to take care of Ana. I love the actor who plays Top (the ex). I’ve said it before (Remember Me) I really want him to get his own series. Also adventures in translation, Top did not say “I can’t believe you’re dating this man”, he said “I can’t believe you’re dating this kid/child”. These two are the ULTIMATE over dramatic college gays. Their relationship has NO drama but they will make it anyway. 

Pastsenger (Thai Weds Gaga) 4 of 12 eps - I like it more and more each new ep. The leads are developing a fun playful relationship. It’s a bit slapstick for me but it’s not offensive or boring. 

A Boss and a Babe (Fri YouTube) ep 5 of 12 - I don’t know. I’m just finding this one kind of boring now. Although, it looks like we are getting cute boyfriends next week so that might be nice. 

Tin Tam Jai (Tues Gaga & iQIYI) ep 6 of 12 - Side couple advanced into lap sitting and tongue kisses out of nowhere. Good tongue kissing, even if surprising. Higher heat! Yay! They’re a great pair, but would it kill Thailand to give us character development with our high heat?

Chains of Heart (Sat iQIYI) ep 7 of 10 - the confusing whateverness of waisted chemistry continues to confuse. 

The Promise (Thai Weds YT) ep 5 of 10 - I don’t know what’s going on with this show. That’s it? He just fell in love with bestie and then punished bestie for his own feelings? Seriously? WTF. ON HIATUS UNTIL APRIL 19. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Dating Sim (Korea Thurs Viki) eps 7-8fin - Absolutely wonderful. There is a time laps but it’s the good kind - NO SEPARATION. Couple of moments when I doubted they could pull it off. But CONGRATZ! We have a new entry into the very rare 10/10 club. I have go change all my best of lists but this was worth it. Final thoughts below. 

Unintentional Love Story (Korea Thurs iQIYI) 5-6 of 10 - (here’s how I’m getting it) KBL rarely gives quality sides dishes but these two are legend. Poor tattooed player hottie is always getting punched. Don’t get me wrong the leads are great too. It’s fun to watch two sets of bisexual identity crisis being handled entirely differently because of good characterization. I say “ouch” a lot while watching this show. Also “awwwww.” I do worry their cafe has no customers tho. 

The Eighth Sense (Korea Weds Viki) eps 1-2 of 10 - With 10 episodes of about 40 minutes each this has got to be one of the longest BLs Korea has ever given us. However from tone, filming style, opening credits, and trailer I am guessing this could be sad. If its KBL doing JBL style then we are in His the series territory, but it could be more in the Blueming vein. I’d give it 50/50 odds. There’s always a chance it wants to be “taken seriously” which is the death knell of BL. Also if a lead smokes it means that one or both will cheat. (I don’t make the rules, the Japanese yaoi gods do.) OK, but do I like it? Yes, actually, it’s... interesting. It’s got a bit of an age gap, country boy/city boy, the acting is great, characters complex, good chemistry and tension. It’s a bit chewy and sticky and less perfect than most KBL (do I detect a touch of Taiwan?). This one is deploying BL tropes (messy eater, shoulder sleep, protective seme, there’s even some hyung-slinging) but it isn’t in the KBL bubble, there’s sharp edges, we may get a coming out sequence or even a bashing. It certainly will stay interesting. But proceed with caution. 

A Shoulder to Cry On (Korea Tues Viki & Gaga) eps 5-7fin - What both these kids need is a little affection and a lot of therapy, not romance. The punishment for flirting in class thing was funny. They are such boyfriends by ep 5 - Sitting together, sharing a glass etc…Terrible awful grueling confession rejection. 2 year time gap. Much needed in this case. Then another 2 before the epilogue. Honestly, the most unlikely thing about this show (after the casting) was the prospect of an out gay Korean cop. No kisses for us. Narrative indicated that there should have been at least a fish kiss, but not happening with them in the same Kpop group. I’m starting to think I really just prefer KBLs where they use actors and not idols (Semantic Error excepted, of course). I’m assuming the next 2 eps are bts. Final thoughts below. 

It’s Airing But ...

Love Syndrome (Thai Sat WeTV) stopped at ep 2 of 12 - I’m just not into any aspect of it (except Lee Long Shi and I can watch him in Tin Tem Jai - see above pic, awesome side dish action) - saving to binge if the end is solid.

Venus in the Sky (Sat YouTube) pilot/tester?) 0 of 10 - not entirely sure what’s up with this one distribution-wise, but the pilot was cute, classic university-set pulp. I hope it happens because the leads are cute with good chemsitry and I thought it was fun. However, it totally holds together as it’s own little short story too. 

Cafe In Love (Thai ???) 10 eps on Ch3+ - Thai pulp, about trying to save a coffee shop. FairyGodBLer came through for me, but I’m collecting to binge just in case. It’s my new policy with the grey stuff. 

Destiny Seeker (Tues WeTV Thailand) 10 eps - it’s not on any WeTV I can get ahold of. Bad Buddy the pulp rebirth meets Japanese handsome host club action. Same as above.

Make a Wish (Thai Weds ?) from WaGa Creative staring Fluke Natouch (OhmFluke UWMA etc...) & Judo (The Miracle Of Teddy Bear) in a medical-fantasy. It seems to be a light-hearted romance with a comedic flair. About a doctor who sees ghosts and a deity who resides in a Bodhi tree that earns merits whenever he fulfills a wish based on a y-novel by Sammon (Manner of Death, Triage). Too hard to find.

Finished this week

Our Dating Sim (Korea Viki) I enjoyed every aspect from the casting to the very simple premise to the quietly smooth execution. Sure it’s very low stakes, but that makes it high domesticity and extremely warm and gentle. This is a fuzzy blanket of a story. Do we call this cozy BL? Why not? This one is going to live in my rewatch pile, I can tell already, and you know what’s best about it? Every single episode is in that pile. There’s no skipping with this one, it might be good natured and calmly sweet but it’s tight and the pacing is excellent. It perfectly suited KBL’s short-length tendencies. Full review. 10/10 I CANNOT RECOMMEND THIS SHOW HIGHLY ENOUGH

A Shoulder to Cry On (Korea Viki & Gaga) - Adaptation of a manwha, high school set bully romance, staring Jaehan & Yechan BOTH from Kpop group OMEGA X, so no kissing. All in all this was a painfully awkward watch for me, and while beautiful and decently acted, the story and characters rendered it ultimately disappointing. I think we shouldn’t let Korea do bully romance. 4/10 FATALLY FLAWED 

Jack O’Frost It was fine. I never really cared about the characters or their relationship. Not to slag off the acting (which was superb) but the narrative bored me. 5/10 WATCH ONLY IF YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO 

In Case You Missed it

Ai Long Nhai got a special ep on iQIYI. 

Eternal Yesterday is getting a movie version with additional content if you want extra suffering. 

A few things have been announced but mostly Thai, Japanese, and 2 (yes, 2) Chinese Omegaverse (Desire and Couple or Not). It’s doubtful these will pass censorship, so I’m not gonna bother tracking until they actually get international distribution. For Thailand, I’m excited about Waterboyy 3, which NOT a remake (hally-fucking-luya) but a new installment, and stars KaownahTurbo (Love Stage!!! et al). Although why the fuck they don’t put Est Supha (swim champ) into one of these is a mystery to me. For Japan, they’ll start airing sooner rather than later, so expect me to start tracking those. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

04.06 Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku (Japan Gaga) - I AM SO EXCITED I LOVE THE MANGA 

04.07 My Beautiful Man Eternal (Japan ????) - 3rd installment, movie which means it’ll be a pain to get hold of. 

No proper post for April but remaining releases are: 

04.14 Naked Dinner AKA Zenra Meshi (Japan Gaga) - not really my thing but yes I’ll watch it 

04.15 My Story (Pinoy YouTube) - not my fandom but I will give it a go

04.18 Step By Step (Thai WeTV) - office age gap, I am all in! Even though it’s WeTV. Sigh. 

April is looking a bit slender so I might start watching Destiny Seeker or Cafe in Love, or both. 

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

Adventures in Captions

Ai Long Nhai special both reviewing its own plot and having fun with English. 

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

The danger in dating an older boy. (Future) 

Love triangle in one photo! (Promise) 

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? Nada, the comebacks have been disappointing recently. 

[telltaleangelina]

TC tag game Thank you for the questions and for tagging me @renaultphile Rules: Answer the questions and tag other TC fans

"He would not fucking say that" only they did and it's canon. When/who?

I don’t think I’ve read it enough to have a sense of something like this. I really disliked Laurie’s scenes with Adrian though. So it’s not so much ‘he wouldn’t say that’ as ‘I would prefer to ignore the fact that he said/did that.'

2. Did they kiss in the study? Yes/no + why you are 100% correct about this.

I think they did. The first time I read it, I didn't really wonder if something had happened, only what had happened: I didn’t know if they’d only kissed or done anything more. Later, it seemed to be confirmed by Ralph’s letter that they’d not done ‘anything more,’ I just assumed it was a kiss, and I don’t really think the dialogue following the ellipses makes much sense without anything having happened. “Now you see what I mean, Spud. It would never have done, would it? Well, goodbye.” What could Laurie have seen if there was nothing besides a hug or handshake or something? What would never have done? Why ask him to ‘come here’ at all?

3. Mandatory question about Ralph's alleged tattoos.

I really don’t think he’d have any, but if he did I think it'd probably be something nautical.

4. 53 vs 59 edition: quote a line or paragraph that is better in the edition you like the least.

I don’t know which of them I read and I definitely haven’t read another addition, so I can’t answer this. Apparently, the earlier one had more detail and dialogue, so if I haven’t I’d love to read it

5. Which TC character would feel right at home here on tumblr dot com?

Sandy, I think he'd be great on here.

6. Tag yourself at Alec's birthday party.

Laurie reading a book or Laurie just at the beginning, sitting around awkwardly, listening to people’s conversations and wondering how on earth he ended up there.

7. Post a TC meme

The first I ever saw (on the Mary Renault tag) and still the funniest to me, I think because I understand it perfectly

8. Easy to talk about who deserved better. Who deserved worse?

Straike, I hate him with a fiery passion. The man had a dog put down, not because he was sick or anything but simply because he couldn’t be bothered to care for him. Vicar? Ridiculous.

9. You can break the fourth wall (at any point in the novel) and say a single sentence to our protagonist, Laurie Odell. What do you say?

'This is not Ancient Greece, stop being weird,' at the exact moment Andrew is telling him his traumatic life-story and Laurie is preoccupied worrying about Dave. Also related to the question, but not really asked for: if I could I’d also tell Andrew he doesn’t have to feel ashamed of how he feels about Laurie. Well, more accurately, I’d give him a modern copy of ‘Quaker Faith & Practice’ and have the relevant passages highlighted, so I know he won’t miss them. It makes me very sad for both Andrew and Dave that their whole lives could've been very different (and much happier) if they were born four or five generations later.

9. What's a question you have about TC? One you haven't found an answer for yet.

I can't think of any, besides wondering how Mary Renault could've written it because it's so good. I love the use of subtext, the way she describes emotions you've felt before but never would've been able to put into words on your own. In terms of characters and story, I do have a random question about Bunny: was it supposed to be implied that he was a perpetrator of sexual assault? I got that idea when I was reading the car scene between him and Laurie but I was unsure.

I don't know who to tag! I think all of the Charioteer accounts I know have already been tagged, but if anyone hasn't and wants to, I'd love to read your response!

[renaultphile]

TC tag game

Thank you for the questions and for tagging me @spudodell.

Rules: Answer the questions and tag other TC fans!

1. "He would not fucking say that" only they did and it's canon. When/who?

Ralph to Laurie in the ‘break-up’ scene, as soon as Laurie starts asserting himself:

"Don't waste time, Spud. It's childish to start an argument about whether we love each other, the moment I go and sit on the other side of the room”

What a horrible thing to say!  Run like the wind, Laurie!

2. Did they kiss in the study? Yes/no + why you are 100% correct about this.

First let’s take a moment to appreciate Spudodell's recent spot of a stealth kiss (can you re-blog that one too, I couldn't find it!) at the beginning of the ‘break-up’ scene when Laurie comes through the door, which to me is absolutely definitive and ground-breaking (not in a good way for me, but still….brilliant detective work!)

On the kiss, I am in the ‘no kiss’ camp, but it is not possible to be definitive.  I feel that Mary plays a lot with echoes, parallels, and contrasts, and for me ultimately I feel the lack of a kiss is meant to be a contrast to other moments in the book, not an echo. 

But what has exercised me more recently is, kiss or no kiss (but especially if there was a kiss), this scene in chapter two really gives me the creeps.  I have been reading around the topic for some schoolboy Ralph fics and Alec/Ralph (watch this space on that one), and it has become ever more clear (Alec Waugh’s commentary ‘Public School Life’ being the best reference on this) that Prefects really were like Gods.  He points out that prefects had almost as much power as but even less accountability than teachers due to the ‘no-snitch rule’.  You can see it in the discussion of Hazell and his confessions, and how contemptuous the schoolboys are of him for 'confessing' (or in modern terms, reporting an inappropriate relationship).

In some ways, a kiss could explain quite a lot about Laurie’s behaviour and attitudes to Ralph in the book.  But to be brutally honest, I’ve had enough of creepy behaviour in men being disguised as ‘romantic’ in heterosexual romances (Mr Rochester, anyone?) and the thought of encountering it in a gay context in such a beloved book is just too much to bear.

So, no kiss for me!  He was still behaving pretty weirdly but that’s understandable in the circumstances.

3. Mandatory question about Ralph's alleged tattoos.

I’m sold on the fic that has him get a tattoo of his sunken ship.  Love the co-ordinates of Dunkirk idea though!  But I think Lux’s one is more realistic.  My reading of that being that he got drunk and wanted to fit in so he got a load of random not-very-good-ones.

4. 53 vs 59 edition: quote a line or paragraph that is better in the edition you like the least.

I favour the ’59 edition, as I broadly feel the cuts make it read better.  But there is one exception.  When Laurie is daydreaming about swimming with Charles, Mary cuts this line:

“Take off your things and jump in."

Apparently skinny-dipping was a step too far for the US audience!  Scandalous!

5. Which TC character would feel right at home here on tumblr dot com?

Bunny but not in a good way.

6. Tag yourself at Alec's birthday party.

I’m Laurie as in sitting in the corner checking out the books.  Not as in going on a rescue mission with some drunken guy.

7. Post a TC meme.

Sorry I couldn’t find the source of this – not exactly a meme but it made me laugh!

8. Easy to talk about who deserved better. Who deserved worse?

Not that I know what happened to them, but Andrew’s relatives who tried as hard as they could to ruin his life, as if his parents dying wasn't bad enough.

9. You can break the fourth wall (at any point in the novel) and say a single sentence to our protagonist, Laurie Odell. What do you say?

I would tell him not to let Dave bully him into leaving Andrew without seeing him.  Because he knows with every fibre of his being that Andrew would not want that.

10. What's a question you have about TC? One you haven't found an answer for yet.

Too many to say.  It’s the unknown unknowns that really get me.

Tagging @gayskogul @telltaleangelina @jeork @alovelywaytospendanevening @black-bentley and anyone else who wants to play and would like to raise their head above the parapet!!

[jeork]

TC Tag Game

As always I’m excessively late to the party, but thanks @renaultphile for the tag!

1. "He would not fucking say that" only they did and it's canon. When/who?

I don’t have a copy of the book at hand right now, but while Laurie is visiting home for the wedding he goes on a walk and recites this weird incest-y song to himself, then contemplates how it always felt relatable to him. I’m not saying he would not fucking say that, because obviously he does and I hear him quite clearly. But I am saying maybe he should not have fucking said that. 

Also Ralph calling Bunny “Boo”. I don’t care how drunk he was, you don’t randomly slip out with a word you wouldn’t otherwise use. It’s part of his vocabulary. This one had me in contemplation for months, like, would he ever call Laurie that? Does this count towards the bad habits and lifestyle choices he wants to abandon while being with Laurie? Whole scene’s just embarrassing af 

2. Did they kiss in the study? Yes/no + why you are 100% correct about this.

I think they probably did, but that it was very chaste. I’m convinced the kiss between Laurie and Andrew is supposed to mirror it almost exactly. The way I see it, Laurie didn’t fully process it and therefore just stood there. From the flashback he got later on while holding onto Ralph’s sleeve while they’re in Ralph's room I think Laurie might’ve grabbed onto Ralph’s arm a little. But other than that I don’t think he did much, which made Ralph decide he wasn’t ready yet.

3. Mandatory question about Ralph's alleged tattoos.

I wasn’t aware this is something people discuss lmao, I’ve only thought about it once myself. Gonna be a party pooper and say he has none, as it's "improper"

4. 53 vs 59 edition: quote a line or paragraph that is better in the edition you like the least.

I feel like me and @renaultphile are the only ‘59 truthers. I think I once even wrote an entire post just on why I like that Mary cut the knee-touch?

Again, don’t have any book copies at hand right now, but I remember one small detail in the ‘53 I really loved. During Alec’s birthday party while he’s blowing out the candles everyone is looking at him, and for a moment there’s this shared feeling of hopefulness. In the ‘53 Laurie feels someone’s eyes on him, but by the time he turns around Ralph has already stopped looking. Something about Ralph glancing at Laurie in this moment, who’s presence represents so much to Ralph, makes me ache. 

5. Which TC character would feel right at home here on tumblr dot com?

I guess the obvious answers would be something like Hazell, Sandy or Bunny, but I feel like Andrew would run the most terrifically angsty aesthetic account. Also young Laurie, he'd probably write bad poetry or something

6. Tag yourself at Alec's birthday party.

The two guys holding hands in dead silence, not because I can relate, but because they really set the scene. Or the petty shit-stirrer who snitches on Ralph having a boyfriend. Or the other petty shit-stirrer who cries "Here comes Bim"

7. Post a TC meme.

I used to run a TC meme account over on Twitter. I’ve planned on reposting all of that stuff on here sometime, in the meantime here’s one: 

8. Easy to talk about who deserved better. Who deserved worse?

Dave. The Mature Wholesome Elder act he’s putting on at the end is pissing me off. Self-serving cu- 

Also, following the heavy implications that Alec had been snuggling it up with Bunny for quite a while, I think he got off pretty scot free 

9. You can break the fourth wall (at any point in the novel) and say a single sentence to our protagonist, Laurie Odell. What do you say?

I really wanted him to stay friends with Reg. I always felt like Madge’s Aunt Vera joke was pretty funny and well intended, albeit improper and terribly timed. It didn’t come off to me as her making fun of him for being gay. More like her trying to awkwardly bond over it, similar to Reg during The Bathroom Talk™. If Laurie hadn’t been so emotionally rattled at that time I feel like he would’ve played it off. It was such bad timing for him. So I wanna scream at him “Chill out, they’re clearly not out to get you!” 

10. What's a question you have about TC? One you haven't found an answer for yet.

I think there still might be a couple minor details, but I can’t remember them right now. The only bigger piece of dialogue that’s still a little intransparent to me is Ralph’s whole speech at the beginning of their post-wedding trip argument. I have my theories about it, but would also enjoy to hear more. 

Considering I’m over a month late and have no clue who did this tag already I’ll open it up to whoever might still wanna do it. 

[notm1keyy]

OOOH i love your tmnt new origins au!!! tho i’ve got a few questions:

1. what are their markings?? are they natural or like tattoos of sorts (thinking the latter bc the hamato symbol on leo’s shell would be pretty weird other wise)

2. who’s is leo’s rival?? i cannot tell! are they an original character or an old tmnt character?

3. WHO IS DONNIE’S ALIEN FRIEND??? she looks super interesting and pretty. like how did they meet in the first place? does april know? (this is most definitely spoilers but she was the most intriguing)

4. their ages are super interesting!! so does donnie have that oldest child syndrome? and how old were they when they were abandoned?

5. the obviously most totally important question of them all /s: DOES IRMA KNOW ABOUT THE TURTLES (i love irma and i’m so glad she’s in ur iteration btw)

uhhhhh yeah super excited! looks super cool!

ACTUALLY CONSUMING ALL OF THESE QUESTIONS AGHHS TY SOSO MUCH IM SO HAPPY UR ENJOYING THE AU?!

1. They’re tattoos! More specifically a form of paint— its why it sort of has that smudged look on their faces :)!! I wanted to represent the bandanas more differently in the AU but still wanted to give them their own color scheme, so that’s where I came up with them just having their designated colors painted onto them (that have lore reasons ofc..)! They all have symbols that represents them!

2. LEO’S RIVAL ISS!! A mystery… dun dun dun… but all will be revealed soon! Hint… they aren’t an oc

3. I can actually reveal who Donnie’s alien friend is! It’s Jhanna!! If you’ve read the mirage comics or have watched the 2003 show, you know who she is… I absolutely loved her character and wish she appeared more, so I had to add her to this AU. As for how Donnie and her met (and if April knows about her), that’s a story for a different time >:3

4. This AU actually takes place pretty recently! So they were abandoned at their current ages; 9-13 years old. I wanted to keep them young because it showed how inadequate they were in being able to protect themselves and how it left Splinter no other choice than to stow his sons away somewhere else because there was no realistic chance of him being able to protect them all by the amount of ninjas after them. Donnie definitely has oldest child syndrome HHEHA he feels like he has to find the solutions for everything. In the turtles eyes, they weren’t abandoned, and whether or not Splinter is alive or not remains a mystery.

5. HAHA OMG IM SO GLAD U NOTICED IT WAS HER!! As of right now— she doesn’t know about the turtles! April has a hard time even convincing herself that the mutant turtles are real… she doesn’t wanna chase away her bestie because of it HEHAHA. But Irma’s helping April not burst into flames of absolute burn-out, we love her.

WOO <3 TYSM AGAIN FOR THESE QUESTIONS IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO ANSWER THEM!

[wsdalt]

omg pls don’t cry, you’re amazing! :’D pfftt

i’m glad to hear that the words helped a bit! it’s important for you to know just how cool everything you did so far has been, so thank you for all of that, really! and whatever decision you come to, we the readers will support it

damn. wolf form ricardo got my attention so bad lmao i’ve been reading some leardo fanfics i’ve found in the spirit site but so far none of them involved the “experiment” side of ricardo, so that’s really cool! if it’s not a problem for you, i would love to hear if/how i can read it if you finish it - even if it’s not posted, maybe i can tell you my account, whatever works

yes i truly get it! i’ve written a few tiny things, and i get the feeling of truly appreciating every single tiny bit of positive interaction the fic gets (especially when it’s a character who doesn’t have a lot of attention in the fandom, like felps’ characters) but also that feeling when you put so much effort and joy into this but there is just a void watching you back and no response

i can’t say it for everyone, but if you do decide to keep posting there’s at least one person that will keep reading and responding whenever i can! but also if you decide not to, i’ll understand it completely too <3 do what makes you happier, i’d say

and no need for the thanks, really! i wish i had more time to talk to every single fanfic writer i’ve ever read a work from and tell them how much i appreciate it, they are truly doing god’s work lmao

- sdol anon

<3!!

at the moment the fic is very basic just me putting words on the page because if I stop to think too hard I probably won’t finish it oops. but those are fine because then I can go back and edit it properly it’s just a much bigger edit (I have a similar fic about a genderfluid Guizo concept but I hadn’t posted that because I hadn’t edited it yet)

if you’re happy to tell me your account I’m happy to send via dms \o/!!

I’m putting this under the cut because I rambled about the concept a lot. based on an “everyone lives” au because well… I like seeing characters deal with the trauma they received during canon

werewolf Ricardo is so cool unfortunately I have never thought that much about werewolves in my life so I am truly just making things up. I will say though I don’t think he’s technically a werewolf—just resembles one? I mean… it’s not a state that is activated by the full moon otherwise he would’ve been in wolf form the whole time, so it’s something similar, but different i think

My current thoughts are that he’s the victim of Blood ritual experiments (and maybe even has some blood ritual tattooing on his back that he wrote off as something weird he got while drunk) since blood is really the only element I know that deals with body transformation in this way? Also with all the blood themed-stuff happening recently it feels like it makes sense pfft

I’m going off of the idea that now the experiment has been activated properly (by him reaching a state of almost dying—aka the fact he did die mechanically if not for his experiment buff of -2 to hits) that it’s more cyclical now…? and that he could maybe learn how to activate it outside of the full moon, but he would need to actively learn ritual stuff for that

(I’m sure all of this is going to be decanonised if he shows up again in the blood spinoff, but that is a while away and I’m already writing au so may as well just have fun with it)

also side note I genuinely can’t watch the scene where all the werewolf-esque stuff is mentioned because it contains something triggering for me, but my lovely friend echo transcribed + cut out the bits and pieces I can’t see. So I know vaguely what’s going on but if you’d like to discuss it with me please keep that in mind… (can confirm what exactly I’m talking about if you need just being vague now for my own sake)

Factorial and I have talked back and forth a lot about what Ricardo’s state would be like in that form. Until we receive more information I am saying it’s more a survival form than anything else—so he’s not going to be bloodthirsty, but he’s going to be very defensive and if something freaks him out he can be dangerous (not on purpose to people he knows, but for strangers yes)

Unfortunately “full moon” is a bit of a trigger for everyone now since the killers seemed to be connected to full moon rituals and such. and “enclosed spaces” is a trigger for Ricardo specifically due to the whole “regaining memories of being caged” thing. So he can often already be pretty panicky when transforming

also to get to the other stuff you mentioned: if you have posted anything you’ve written I’d love to read it!!

but yes I’m not sure I’ll just… see how I feel next time I have a finished fic? maybe take a break to instead focus on translating my fics to Portuguese? we’ll see…

but yes i get that I’m very slow to comment because i just don’t have much time… i have a list in my head, but I’m thinking I might make a spreadsheet too pfft just so i don’t miss anything (I also need to get better at commenting in Portuguese on Portuguese fics… I’m a bit nervous to at the moment oops)

(also do you need an account to comment on spirit fics? because i do have one but i don’t often like commenting as a non-guest unless i know the person… depends on my mood a bit though)

this photo remains relevant to me pfft

[takeshitakyuuto]

Trigun Book Club reading update volume one

This is my first full experience with Trigun, and I am participating due to my civic duty as a tihylttw fan. よろしく～

What I know about the series already:

Space western! (+)

Vash is a twin? with someone named Knives?

Something about gods that I don’t understand and don’t want to

Kitty :3

I am infamous far and wide for my loquacious book club participations, so from here on out will be under read more. Spoilers for volume one of Trigun only

My usual file reader was glitching out so I had to find a new one to read this volume and oh my god the text is so tiny. why. thank god for zoom (and furigana)

Ch 1. Okay Vash’s fit is fire. Fashion icon

I really like the world building we get right off the bat. The little sign showing the day’s crimes was funny, clever, and really establishes what we’re dealing with.

Vash’s “death” chapter one? oooooo I really like where we’re heading with him...

He gave a child a pistol?!?!?!? childcare king tbh

So far my favorite character is the blonde lady with the huge gun (Milly?)

Ch 2. The appearance of The Cat!

Are these... human cars?

Freckles asking the questions I’ve had all along! I’m excited to see what Vash’s “quest” is and why it would put such a big bounty on his head, especially since he seems like a guy with strong morals.

*Gets “KISS MY ASS” tattooed on my hand* no you don’t understand, its a Trigun reference. So you know the genre space western? Hey, why are you walking away, I’m not done yet!

Ch 3. Does this place have a government???

Jack pot!!

Yaoi proportioned Vash

Oh the lesbians are from the government

I love Vash realizing the power of lesbians

Ch. 4 Vash the Stampede: impervious to bullets, but not to grate corners

Is this chapter 5 now? Bad Lads Group is an absolute top tier name for a terrorist organization

Oh boy the introduction of Rem. What a great introduction, I can’t wait to see what relationship she had/(has?) to Vash. Based on that little dream of his, I don’t think she’s alive anymore or at the very least has no contact with Vash

Ch 6. チビスケｗｗｗｗ

I might just be because they’re both space westerns but this is also giving me more and more Cowboy Bebop vibes in the way of I never know who’s going to be a recurring character or just in it for the chapter. I’m sure as the series goes on though we’ll start seeing more overarching plot and less “Vash Gets Himself Into Sticky Situations”

Also, this dude loves jumping out of windows

Ch 7. A Chapter called Rem? Excitingggggg

Ya’ll weren’t kidding when you said that the art could be a little hard to understand... I thought Vash got shot but it was someone else’s blood 🥵

Vash calling the group understaffed and then immediately opening a door to see a horde of grunts... the comedic timing in this series is impeccable

Oh look, おわり！

Final thoughts: I thought this was a solid first volume! It’s very out of my element- I don’t read much shounen and I read even less action series. It took me a while to get used to the shounen style of Japanese (unexpected yet happens every blue moon that I decide to pick one up) and the action vocabulary was also difficult, as I never see any of it. Okay enough about language learning, we’re all here for the plot. I still feel like I’m not completely sure about what the plot is, but I also know that that’s fairly typical with manga. I liked the recurring characters that we were introduced to and it opened up plenty of questions to be answered later. As for Rem, she seems like some sort of God character (as opposed to a god character). As for my favorite characters from the volume, it stays Milly and ohmygodijustforgothername Meryl. Let’s see if I stay on track with the reading or if I decide to read ahead :3c