#i love heizou

[supportingfire]

scara eat ur heart out

[monicahar]

“would you kiss your ex to save me?”

this trend is so funny, so why not try it with genshin men

gn! reader, mention of death cause uh ur life is on the line obviously, fluff, crack,

yes. because a kiss with them is nothing while a life with you is everything.

—zhongli, KAZUHA, thoma, tighnari, albedo, VENTI, ayato, kaeya, diluc <3

i'd break up with you so you become my ex, and then i'd kiss you, and get back together with you again.

—cyno, HEIZOU, ALBEDO, xingqiu, aether, childe

no. you can just drop dead.

—scaramouche

you'd get mad at me and leave me after so probably not. i'll visit you and give you flowers weekly though.

—itto, wanderer

maaaybe.

—HEIZOU, ayato, VENTI, xingqiu, albedo, childe, kaeya

i don't have one.

—XIAO, mika, kunikuzushi

how in the world would you get in that situation anyway?

—ALHAITHAM, kaveh, CYNO, chongyun, tighnari, xiao

let's just die together.

—wanderer, abyss! aether

yeah, but i'd spread drool and saliva all over my lips and eat onions to make the experience as horrible as i can. they'll basically be tasting loogie :D

—gorou, heizou, ITTO, KAVEH, bennet

*refuses to actually answer*

—xiao, scaramouche, chongyun (double it and give it to the next person)

razor.

—razor (he doesn't understand)

[gamergirl-niffler]

Iridescent Arataki Rockin' for Life Tour de Force of Awesomeness

[genshin-impact-updates]

Happy Birthday, Shikanoin Heizou!

To what do I owe the pleasure? Could it be that you have a new case for me?

As it just so happens, I have all the time in the world right now! I'm so bored I even started theorizing about why the restaurant next door is so lively today.

Let's head over to the scene of the crime. The other witnesses are already there waiting for us, I trust?

...Hmm, I think I know what's going on here.

After all, the culprit has already struck. It wouldn't do for a famous detective such as myself to back down now, would it? Let's go!

Thanks to DSマイル for the fantastic artwork!

[bbaycon]

Gramps are catching up after 3600 yearish

[superzizikiki9000]

I KEEP FORGETTING TO POST AUUGHH

pls have this Thing as compensation because uni work just started to pile up and i still dont know half of the campus LMFAO

(said Thing is a product of some several character interactions in an actor au rp with me and the oomfies. i shit u not i cant even begin to explain how we thought up of this character combo but .... um. yeag)

[pruwinkle]

did a little bit of experimenting :>

[damianito]

Kaedehara "Kiss stealer" Kazuha

(My commissions are OPEN!)

[kyvnnie]

happy one year of me loving this ship

wow time really flies by, i still remember the time i discovered this ship mannn, fym it’s brrn a year already!!

thank u to them for bringing me comforts, LOVING U BOTH TIL THE END!!!!

[genacity]

⌗ nsfw fucking little loser heizou </3

i have a problem with guys who are absolute LOSERS. i mean like literally bitchless fucking weirdos who have never felt the touch of a woman (i am going insane)

maybe its just my corruption kink or sm shit like that but theres something about fucking a little nerd that makes my head spin… so lets demonstrate with my cheeky bf heizou 😇

you’ve seen him in class before. he’s one of the kids in the back of the classroom always silently much too concentrated on some manga or comic book he’d been reading that week. eyes lingering far too long on a certain page, only for it to be a panel of a woman with her thighs wrapped around some guy’s head you notice after passing behind him to sharpen your pencil. (he later claims the characters were taking a self-defense course. you don’t believe him.)

hearing him talk about how he could pin a girl down with ease; snickering to his friends about how easily he could become dominant in the bedroom. you and your friends giggle as you pass— knowing damn well he’d never been loved by a woman besides his mother a day in his life.

when you finally manage him into your bedroom. distracted from the project you were assigned partners in for that same class you caught him drooling over a certain page of his book. pushing heizou onto your sheets, his poor head spinning at the sight of you towering over him. hitched breath, sweat pooling on his brow. this was not the way it went in his manga.

sweet sounds of pleasure barely passing through your closed door, the poor boy’s back arching with every gasp and whimper of your name as your hand pumps his flaring cock. heizou can barely make a sound beyond a whine— the sound of his own voice behind the melody of his own slick being used to abuse his cock made his brain melt into a puddle in the back of his head.

“cum— cum! please!” heizou gasped, thighs shaking as he felt his orgasm near for what seemed the nth time that night. he whimpered at the sound of you laughing, knowing his blubbering pleas had fallen on deaf ears. his cute cries of “cumming!” “y/n—!” “fuh—fuck!” driving you to madness.

going back to school and seeing he’s got a new manga. peering over his shoulder as you go to put the final touches on your shared project you could barely finish at your house— only to see a new image; a man on his knees with a collar around his neck.

[adrilia]

he’s taking a little rest, leave him be…

(happy birthday!)

[yelanhours]

💤 how they wake you up !

genshin men headcanons about how they interrupt your well-deserved sleep

ft. diluc, albedo, venti, childe, zhongli, xiao, itto, heizou, kazuha, thoma, ayato, cyno, tighnari, alhaitham, kaveh, scaramouche

practically shaking you awake he's been awake for an hour now and you've still been asleep. he's done everything to pass the time - watch some tv, cook breakfast, take a five minute nap, and even went shopping - and you're still not awake. what other choice does he have but to shake you so you wake up? "...huh?" you say, turning back and forth because your boyfriend is shaking you. "what's this for?" "you've been asleep for the past few hours and you still wouldn't wake up!" he pouts, before hugging you tightly. "so i had to go to more desperate measures." "desperate...? you're only shaking m-" "shush."

kaveh, itto, childe, heizou, venti, xiao, scara

alluring you with breakfast your bf is basically a malewife (*cough* thoma *cough*) and decides to head to the kitchen and whip up a batch of your favorite food. when it's done, he sets it on the dinner table and sneaks back into your shared bedroom. "wake up, darling~" he coos, brushing a stray strand of hair away from your face. "five more minutes..." you manage to utter, before closing your eyes again and slowly drifting off to sleep. "well, that's a pity. i just finished making your favorite food." he fake-sighs, sitting on the edge of the bed with his arms crossed. "hm? wait, really?" you perk up from the covers and start running towards the kitchen. he chuckles and follows you and hugs you from behind when you; least expect it. "woah, this is really good!" you say with food in your mouth. "glad you like it."

diluc (sorta), tighnari, thoma, ayato, possibly zhongli

whispering in your ear the sun slowly rises above the horizon as your boyfriend wakes up. you're usually also awake a few minutes after he is, so he waits for a little bit while reading a book. after waiting for what seems like forever, he realizes you're not gonna wake up by yourself. so he leans towards your ear, and whispers soft things. "it's time to wake up, y/n." he whispers. "the morning isn't as bright without you. besides, i'm not used to waking up without the usual cuddles and kisses." he caresses your right cheek, cupping your face in his hands. you squirm and then flutter your eyes open to see your boyfriend next to you in bed, cheeks rosy. "you're awake~ c'mon, let's go make breakfast." he says, holding your hand and lifting you up. you follow him without a sound, remembering all the things he just said to you in the past minute.

albedo, kazuha, cyno, alhaitham (not as flirty)

@seajellyx saved my life thank you

k bye

[arsgoeteia]

yeah.

[mellysketches]

Kazuhei doodle dump 💗

[superzizikiki9000]

crack friendship that started as an inside joke on some rp server but now im too invested

[harukamitsuki]

(spoilers for dcmk ahead)

detective conan seriously needs to stop wasting our time and end already. gosho just keeps introducing more and more characters that we either don't care about or are just there to be the love interest.

i love dcmk, i really do. but, and i can't believe i'm saying this, it's too long!! and, trust me, i'm no slouch when it comes to length. (aka, has rewatched one piece at least 10 times).

but it's dragging out! it's clear that gosho has realised he has fans who will stick with it regardless, because the overarching plot is interesting, but how are we supposed to stay invested if we rarely get to see the plot?

there are less episodes where the black organisation appears than there are tv original episodes. don't get me wrong, i love... some of them, but i love the plot-heavy episodes so much more.

it has, canonically, only been six months since shinichi was turned into a child. SIX MONTHS! AND DCMK HAS BEEN OUT FOR 28 YEARS!!

we don't need each character to have a romantic sub-plot. we don't need an in-depth backstory for each character.

we don't need to see each and every case they come across.

i'm all for slice of life - i love it, in fact. but not when there's such a strong plot behind it.

i feel like the desperate revival arc should have been the turning point, where it starts to be more head-strong in the plot, maybe throwing in a kaitou kid chapter/episode for a break. but it doesn't.

instead, we are 210 chapters into the Rum Arc with no sign of it stopping soon. the bourbon and akai arc was 276 chapters, and we all remember how long it took for that to end.

i'm at the point where i just pick and choose episodes to watch, (thank you detectiveconanwiki), because nobody cares about the will they? wont they? for anyone but shinran and maybe heizuha but that's been dragged out more than enough.

seriously, heiji didn't realise he had feelings for kazuha until 600 episodes in? and he called kazuha 'his' but pretends he didn't because it wasn't as amazing as shinichi's confession? i stopped caring the second momiji was introduced because, oh, can't have a love story without an obstacle! FUCK OFF

ran's character went from a strong female woman who was struggling with the fact that the love of her life is gone, to 'help us, shinichi!'. like- come ON! she grew up with shinichi and you're telling me she doesn't have any deductive prowess? what happened to her suspecting conan of being shinichi? BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE SHE'S FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT IT

and it's so hard to come up with your own ending, because there's still so much that hasn't been answered.

what is the aptx 4869 being used for? (have my own theory, and wouldn't be surprised if it was right). what is the 'silver bullet' haibara's parents were working on? what's the black orginisation's goal? is karasuma renya still alive? what is vermouth's relation to him? why hasn't she aged?

AND SO ON AND SO FORTH

JUST GET ON WITH IT GOSHO