#i love drawing and i love that people are capable of drawing i just cant envision 3d forms in my mind so its hard ok gn
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Time and Time Again comes back tonight!
Thank you all for being so patient with me, I know it was a long hiatus.
My health was struggling, my arm was (is) hurting, and I decided it wasn't worth it. I'd rather be slow!
So thank you for giving me that grace, and I hope you'll be there with me for the rest of the series.
#like straight up. it's not worth it. idc how many people get mad at me#i would rather work fuckin. anything else than maintain this impossible schedule and keep hurting myself#if thats what it takes to do comics full time. then i can't do comics full time. simple as that!#i hope that for my next work i can have a healthier schedule and still make this work as my job#but if not. I'm never going back#i can't do it. 3 more years at this pace will take my ability to draw#anyways. its really good!!!#like genuinely i can feel a marked improvement in my skills#which is WILD!!! And I'm extremely happy about that!!!#just one more step into being better built to give people the quality stories they deserve.#ive not properly had the fire under my ass to finish stuff up but. its fine.#like i said? not worth it.#if i have to pause again then ill pause again. like i literally simply can not my body can't handle it#so. hopefully stuff goes smoothly but whatever happens will happen#whatever will be will be#i keep getting distracted lmfao#im excited about it coming back#and also. will. probably be distracting myself...#other creators dont read their comments. I'm like straight up not capable of that LMAOOO#i check for comments like all the time#love seeing em. love reading people's thoughts about my work#it makes me a better writer and keeps me connected to what matters most. which is my audience!#so i dont regret doing that but also. jts extremely distracting#i get straight up nothing done on big update days#cause im in the comments absolutely massive eyed refreshing.#this sounds obsessive. and it is. no jk#its just fun and keeps me in touch w peoples perception which helps me learn to write better#plus people are nice and ask me questions that i wanna answer#or if someone is being an ass. then i wanna tell them to leave (cause i cant block people) cause i consider it my responsibility#time and time again
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Will you please please please make a part two to “you’re alright where you are” on AO3. The ending was too sad and I physically can’t take it.
Per my doctor I'm not allowed to write happy endings my b king
#MORE IN COMMENTS. but in short:#Sorryyyy I love when people are sad. perhaps one day I'll write something more for them but I kinda summed up all my feelings there.#I mean kinda. I really want to explore the depths of petya's religious guilt in opposition of andrei's seeming lack of it. he is very much#an ideal for Pyotr... a role model since they were younger... the bigger and stronger and much more capable kid.... a more natural talent.#a more natural ability to draw people to him. a good skater from the day he touched the ice. fine not that dramatic. but you get it. there#just can't really exist a happy ending for them in my mind without a really long and extensive period of growth where Petya digs out of the#cultural ideas of homosexuality and religion he was raised in. he is a DEVOUT Russian Orthodox Christian and just speaking from#personal experience. that is not something you can just shake off. it takes years of unconditioning a deeply rooted hatred and borderline#disgust to reach something even vaguely resembling acceptance and I skipped over ALL of that in that fic. I wanted to go in depth but I als#wanted to keep it under like. 10k words. my point is that I just don't see it with them. I don't see a happy ending that doesn't take years#if not a decade+ of personal growth and change. and this isn't me saying Petya is homophobic in real life or that all Russians are this is#me saying that he is incredibly religious just. as a person. and as someone who was also raised in that even to a lesser degree. it is TOUG#to accept yourself after you've been poisoned that deeply. and I just cant hand a happy ending over to them that would be satisfying to me.#ask#luhayesea
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how to write vent post title that does not come off as self-pitying and or accusatory (because it's NOT !)
#sorry tumblr is like a diary to me idk what i'll do w this blog after i (sigh) inevitably move on#either way#im convinced everyone hates me again :3 but realistically no one cares about me even enough to hate me im just stupid and self centred 💔#if anything me TYPING these posts is actuvely turning people against me#again with the assumptions that people care enough to read these 😭 fhskfbhsjfkg#i hate that i care so much what people online think of me cuz irl it's like. whatever#but here there are so many cool people who i admire and would love to be friends with im always hyperparanoid of everything i do#and still i manage to overstep and come off as annoying#like obvs you're allowed to hate me even if you're someone i look up to like that's your perogative#but i hate worrying about IF anyone hates me#oughgh this is easier irl because usually people send off pretty clear signals if they dont like you#but online (esp with how prickly this fandom is) i don't know whether im being insecure and reading into things or whether people just don't#like me (which again is fine i would just rather know if anyone gets it)#i figure art is the one way i can get people to like me 💔 which sounds kinda pathetic because irl i KNOW im liked and capable!#fandom has just become such a big part of my personality that i cant detach my self worth from it#and i do love art and drawing and such i hate that even if i know people my stuff EYE dont and it doesnt mean anything or act as a signifier#of my friendships#wow .... i really am my own therapist ..... i should shut up#the industrial revolution and its consequences (jofandom)#i think these posts are half self exploration half ... almost self harm? because sometimes im so derogatory about myself on purpose in a#'you're worthless' way. but at the same time it's cathartic and i always feel better having probed at my feelings and gotten them in order#not to do a complete 180 but it's MY post and JO LONDON IN *12* DAYS!!!!!!!! AHH i'm sooo excited if it doesnt live up to my expectations i#may cry a little. and there will be another vent post from me !#sometimes i wonder if anyone actually reads these 😭#vee rambles
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ngl i think i kind of was a genius for being like 'yeah this character is a scary killyou cannibal scary killer who scary kills you' and then realizing that the way my worldbuilding works out is that there's a nonzero chance that if you leave literally any body parts over they can just come back, depending on what they believe in their heart of hearts can kill them. Of course she'd start eating her kills. She probably tried normal stuff first and then realized it didn't work and she had to try harder if she wanted to actually keep them dead.
#red rambles#im working on a character who i made up years and years ago and wasnt even happy with then because he didnt seem to have enough like#interior thoughts he was just like a guy who killed people when he was stressed and his life was constantly stressful and then he killed on#person too many and they were like 'this is fucking untenable and he has to die' and then they killed him#which is soooooooooo absolutely nothing honestly. Like it works as a barebones summary but i want to stress there was actually straight up#nothing else there. the entire rest of his whole whatnot was just being entangled with Haven who is a different character who at the time#ALSO felt unsatisfyingly lacking in interiority but at lesat he had really complex motivations and action flowcharts. that werent just 'i#get grumpy and i just go kill some random person with no regard for what the consequences will be and then i am so mean and i kill you'#now theres a lot more happening. i really didnt. like.#okay so i had a Backstory worked out but it was vague because i didnt know what the fuck he WANTEDDDDDDD right like. i had no motivations a#literally all except 'oohhh i kill people ooohhh i like killing people ooohhh im erratic i kill people' and the background i HAD was like.#Upper class scion of some rich family whose family honest to god just did not like him very much and also [gestures vaguely] i guess he#maybe kicked dogs or something and then he ??nebulous timeline meets haven and then kills his sister or kills his sister and very quickly#thereafter meets haven but i usually lean toward the former because haven LOVES convincing people to kill their whole families its like#cathartic for him because he would love to kill his entire family but physically cannot do it. but like kind of the implications of this#as far as i was concerned given this is set in the mid 1800s was like. ehhh he's getting away with this because he's rich white and male an#it pays to turn a blind eye to his indiscretions or w/e. a genderswap means that she'd be subject to a lot more scrutiny on basis of like#misogyny. LOL. and i already had the preexisting 'hates half sibling' (i genderswapped the sister into a brother because why not) and 'hate#parents' and 'parents strongly dislike her' and 'unsettling' and it worked nicely to start giving me actual fucking. Literally anything to#work with there. because it means that by going off with Haven she walks out of one situation where she has like 0 agency into another one#and like to be clear i respect anyone who is sitting around in haven's general vicinity for snapping and just starting to kill people. me t#but this works. SOOOOOOOOOO much better for real#im still working the kinks out but like also this means that she wins. she wins like multiple times actually. she comes closer to killing#haven than anyone since he learned what fucking species he was and causes him more trouble in the interest of getting the FUCK out of there#than anyone else has and then she fucking gets what she was going for against literally every effort haven could've made over ~five decades#get owned loser.#every time i draw her i cant help it i write some shit like PLEASE JUST GET DIVORCED on it even though i wrote the fucking narrative i know#it will never fucking happen and thats why she does all this shit instead#in another world she'd be like the wildly capable owner of Raytheon 2 or some other shit like that. like she'd never be a nice or good#person but she wouldn't be dead. god she could be in charge of a country or some shit. Alas. Please get divorced.
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[wip]
school's been killing me so i've been inactive and will continue to be inactive in the nearest future. i can barely find the energy/motivation/time to draw for myself, but here's a little seph wip ive started today out of sheer desperation to draw SOMETHING lol
#anyway to draw this i had to ignore working on both of my diplomas#+preparing for next week overall and an animation assignment :3#gonna lump all of my responsibilities on tomorrow and hope i can do it all in 1 day#also i hope im not sick#would suck if i was sick#i might be getting sick#the only thing ive been capable of is playing ow2 and writing gay fanfiction for it in my spare time#cuz even if i have a less intense school day im still exhausted cuz of the public transit#not to mention SHOUT OUT TO WEDNESDAY I LOVE WEDNESDAY#I LOVE HAVING A 1O HOUR SCHOOL DAY MHM#7am to 4pm that shit must be violating some regulations or rights idk#but the people in charge of our schedule are basically like lmao cant do anythin about that sorry#deal with it#and also this is the lite version of my schedule#cuz i have 3 hrs less than im technically supposed to have cuz the fucking photography teacher wont show up for work#and im lowkey hoping they cancel photography altogether this year for my sanity#also ive been kinda artblocked since the beginning of september#also also im lowkey hating my own art again#im just unhappy with my art#i wanna enjoy drawing and i wanna draw a lot but i just cant#plus ive been having trouble with drawing anything besides faces#like my anatomy is outta wack and its messing with me#i cant even draw characters without getting frustrated that its either just their face or a shitty attempt at a cool pose#everything i draw feels bad or uninspired#anyway#wip#tendebill ocs#tendebill art#personal#life update
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u guys ever think about killing urself for everyone elses sake.
just so people wont have to go thru the annoyance of talking to me or the disgust of seeing my face so they can be happier by talking to their other friends instead of me so they dont have to deal with my actual fucking stupidity
#tw vent#tw suicide#ingnore this. btw. or dont i cant stop you lol#imsso close to cutitng off everyone i know so they can be happier i alreadyblocked a few people i knewnow ionly know one person irl#imf so glad she found other people so she'll be completely fine if i disappear out of her life her life sounds like its going great actuall#ruining my life ^_^#i dont want to talk to people but for their sake#IM GENUINELY SO FUCKING STUPID AND UPSETTING TO TALK TO .#does anyone even love me anymore#im probably doign this for my own selfish reasons#i dont go outside anymore for everyone else sake. so they dont have to see my ugly face. or deal with my awful speech#at least i can still draw.... only way i can mkae people happy..#im mean to myself more than anyone else is mean to me at htis point. why#im not even capable of becoming mentally well at hthis point. im a lost cause#tell me what you rlly think . just tell me to shut the fuck up. just call me annoying. whatever u say cant be worse than what i do to mysel#pleasee im just dragging u down and making u feel worse whenever u tlak to me DO YOU NOT REALISE IT#i dont want to feel better for myself i want to feel better so i can be useful to others#i fucking hate people but i love them a lot . i gues i just hate how i affect others. social outcast i guess
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hi friends! big rant incoming— i want to clarify this isnt targeted at anyone, im just noticing a pattern and im getting a little upset with some of the requests im being sent ):
something that really bothers me is the babyfication of giyuu tomioka. the fandom infantilizes the dude way too much. and its even worse when you throw shinobu into the mix and have her being a maternal figure to him when she herself is an eighteen year old who has worked as a hashira since she was a teenager. she does not need to be put into these situations where she’s taking care of her older peers all the time
i see this happen a lot and i feel its rooted in misogyny whether people recognize it or not. almost always the male characters are thrown into positions where the female character has to take care of them and its really frustrating
shinobu isnt a maternal character at all. to inosuke and the younger ones, it’s different, but if i keep seeing her being a mom to giyuu im actually going to lose my mind. giyuu isnt some uwu depressed baby who cant stand up for himself. he is just as mean as sanemi and obanai. he trained to survive and operate in horrible situations and fight for his life for years. hes a grown man and a hashira. he would not be babied by anyone, especially not someone who he has known since she was around fourteen years old
you may say “well ghostbite dont you do this with mitsuri and obanai”… sure. perhaps i am a hypocrite. but you must remember mitsuri is just sort of like that. she loves cute things and she loves fawning over everyone and everything. her scenes with nezuko. her introduction scene in the hashira meeting with her gushing over everyone. she hand feeds tanjiro pancakes in the recent season. she refers to people as “cutie.” etc etc etc
the difference with obanai and giyuu is obanai is often characterized as a yandere simp who is a huge bully to giyuu and tanjiro. he’s not. i like to put him in deaging situations a lot because unlike everyone else, he’s been through hell since birth. he’s never, not once, had a moment of peace. he had no siblings growing up to protect him— he had no loving parents, etc. he never felt love and he believes he is undeserving of it and should never reciprocate it. so here comes mitsuri, the epitome of love. he takes care of her. he watches after her. he is devoted to her. if something happens to him, especially if it’s a situation where he’s much smaller and weaker and in need of care, mitsuri would drop everything to help him. if it were mitsuri, obanai would do the same for her. it’s in both of their characters to do this. them being in these situations makes sense
i love shinobu. she would not. she does what a doctor does, looks for a cure, checks in here and there, and leaves it at that. she is not giyuu’s “mama.” she is an eighteen year old girl who has her own bucketload of issues. if you need her in a maternal role then use inosuke or literally any of the butterfly girls— the kids she actually takes in and takes care of. not her 21 year old coworker who is more than capable
if anything i think shinobu should be put in deaging situations. have giyuu take care of her instead. mix it up a little. but people are so attached to the idea of having every single caregiver role go to the woman that it’s unlikely we’ll see that
this is not a criticism on giyuu. i love giyuu. but i need people to stop treating him like a defenseless baby, and for people to quit seeing shinobu as responsible for him as a caregiver or a mother
tdlr: please stop asking me to draw or write deaged giyuu stuff. someone else can do that. i dont like deaged giyuu. tiny 21 trio is essentially on hold because of this ): i keep getting nonstop requests for deaged giyuu and im so tired, especially because people are framing it in a “you should replace obanai with giyuu” lens, or adding “mama shinobu doing x with baby giyuu”
it’s tiresome and frustrating. i love to make content for you guys, and i love when its something that appeals to you in a comforting way, but if you want specific content with giyuu— you’re very much in the wrong place. i hate the fandomification of him and shinobu— it makes me uncomfy and sad.
other people are deaging giyuu and putting him in situations— go ask them instead of me. i would rather highlight misunderstood and underrated characters like obanai and gyomei or my own personal faves (muichiro) then constantly loop the same exact character over and over again
all this to say im doubling down on the babybu and babynai and pintsized pillars aus. if you keep asking for baby giyuu and maternal figure shinobu my spite makes me stronger. hashtag let shinobu be taken care of for once. she’s already the doctor for an entire organization give my girl a break
#askbites#not artbites#bitetalks#rant#demon slayer#kny#giyuu tomioka#shinobu kocho#obanai iguro#mitsuri kanroji#again this isnt targeted#i just rlly need people to stop sending me these things#and im tired of seeing the mischaracterizations and constant misogny going on#shinobu get behind me#mischaracterization#fandom#fandomification
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21 asks! Thank you! :}} 😶🌫️
I mean this in the nicest way possible.. but crossing my boundaries/going against my wishes is still bad even if its in private/in secret. Please just don't make any kind of fanart based on my stuff. I just want interactions. 😔
@neo-metalscottic
Hello! My days been a little rough, but at least I haven't seemed to catch that cold yet! <:D
As for the Sun and Moon.. I'm kind'a on the fence about my AU ngl. I don't want a repeat of Octonauts where people just yoink all my ideas and copy all my designs. So atm I'm not open to sharing anything I've made for them.. sorry <:/
As for your Mario ask, the clown cars are a thing! :0 They just are shaped a bit differently and Bowsers doesn't have a goofy face in his XD its the koopalings that painted faces on their mini ones.
@aamin-original
Google translation: "I love your character! It is very original and looks very charismatic! I hope you see this message, I really want you to continue drawing, you draw very beautifully."
:DD Thank you!! Though I don't know when I'll post next.. getting my Octonauts art and my original characters traced has been pretty frustrating.
@obtainedtinyteeth
Uhg, such a shame that you found me through stolen artwork. But hey there's a master post here for all my FNAF stuff so.. there's that.
Also thank you <:))
I have not, so I have no opinion on the story or characters <:/
Sorry, but atm I'm not really open to talking about the plans for my AU. I'm keeping it all private until further notice..
@beryl-shade
I'm not really open to talking about my AU right now.. But I can talk about the NPCs :0
When it comes to the background/crowd NPCs like the candy land citizens, as seen here-
They are not as sentient or as advanced as Gummigoo and his buddies. They don't have unique bodies, personalities or names, they are just bare bones NPC coded to just stand in the crowd and follow a script.
Same as he does in canon. He's just Caines goofy A.I. assistant :0
@glitchhayden418
I have no idea what you're referring to <XD
@paulacooks
I'm not open to sharing much, but I will say I have plans to make Jax more likable. He's so rotten in canon <XD
@jdsstudio
Now why they'd have to go and bring Mike back 💀
Hate to say it but the decision is final, I've had enough of tracers and thieves. I plan to only draw Octonauts in private.
Thank you though <:) I'm doing my best to take it easy.
@rockyztownesys
SCREAMS AAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :DDD This was the major mood lifter I'd been needing <:)) Thank you so much
@rainwwatermelon7
Ah sorry, but I wouldn't be okay with that.. but I mean props to you. Just taking it, coloring it and sending it back without asking would be much worse.
And thank you! :D I'm glad to hear that you like my artwork! :DD
@milk-powrit
Not really sure how those episodes would play out..
@chromchill
Even then, just use free bases or show/movie screenshots. That's how I learned.. but yeah I get what you're saying. That's not nearly as bad as tracing and posting it as your own.
@somcdonaldsamirite
That would definitely be something :0
@kind-of-human1
I wont share much. But I can say that Caine was always like that/was capable of being like that. As time went on in the circus he kept leaning further and further away from "haha I'm a wacky A.I. ringmaster! :))" and more towards "these people really need my help to escape this place- and I gotta do what ever I can to comfort them in the meantime"
@carsaadi
Hello! :D So far I've drawn Caine without canines because its already hard enough to draw his "face"/expressions as he is. Adding sharp teeth would just complicate his face and make it even harder to draw expressions..
Plus so far I'm liking the vibe all flat teeth gives him. He still feels like a goofy cartoon character. Meanwhile adding sharp teeth makes it look like he's trying to be realistic... if that makes sense..? 'm more for cartoony <XD
@caronaro-flipaclip
1: I cant think of anyone who'd say that <XD
2: He might tease Ragatha, but he doesn't bully her and he doesn't bother Gangle at all.
3: I imagine is sound about the same as it does in canon! :0
@asperanna
Other than knowing its gonna have the light and dark looking sky kids from Eden, I cant actually grasp what this season could possibly be about...
I'm excited for it none the less! :)
Also as for the two sky kids themselves- the scene with them in Eden always makes me feel something 🥲
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So do you actually believe PLD is a good player or is that part of the bit?
The PLD Post
i spent a good 2 days giggling about this to friends. i cant tell if ur a curious caps fan, a person who knows me from my other teams, a disgruntled kings fan (i’ve mostly ruled this out because im pretty sure i know all of the active ones on here) or WHAT. but i’m laughing. the tone of this ask is hilarious and vaguely accusatory but i will take it in good faith and answer <3 tl;dr yes and no. he’s better than people think he is rn, but he’s likely never going to live up to the potential of his tools unless something . idk. recalibrates his entire being. who knows!
i was working on something longer and more complex but i thought about it for more than 5 seconds and i REFUSE to go hockey-bro mode and pull out the microstats and i don’t wanna make this into a full on PLD manifesto. so. caps girlies (gn) HERE are your adoption papers under the cut!
if you are looking at pierre luc dubois who is 6’4 + 220lb and thinking “Oh he’s a power forward” i have to inform you he is in fact THEEE smallest mouse to ever play hockey in the whole world and in all of history. he sips nectar out of a thimble and sleeps curled up in a match box and goes fishing in a boat made from nutshells and twigs . he’s big, but he sort of plays small.
this is not necessarily a bad thing — he relies on foot speed and skill over hitting.
he can throw hits but prefers to stick check. he leverages his big frame to guard the puck and to defend, and it makes him simultaneously VERY effective and very much what i like to call a Nexus Of Crime. he is either drawing ten thousand penalties because people have to do something to stop him from driving the net with speed OR he is taking ten thousand penalties because he gets eager in the corners.
PLUS he’s huge and refs do just assume he’s committing a crime when they can’t see what’s going on <3 hence, Nexus Of Crime! if there’s a penalty he’s probably involved LMAO
not a “dirty” player by any means. not physical unless he decides he wants to. and there is no violence inside of him unless he’s deeply horsebonded to his team <- IMPORTANT re; playoffs aspirations. you won’t see him put himself on the line simply for the love of the game, he HAS to be committed to the team.
to be committed to his team… i’m honestly not sure what that takes. i’d guess a combination of knowing his role on the ice and in the locker room (this was very unclear on lak) consistency of messaging from coaches (also seemed to be an issue on lak)
i know nothing about caps coaching or management or the team vibes but i’m sure you can fix him <3 i’m ready to fall in love and ride this team to the sunset
this failhorse will NOT shoot the puck and if he does it will be the saddest soggiest most pathetic shot you’ve ever seen. you will tear your hair out in chunks if you watch him expecting an elite goalscorer.
he’s a pass-first guy. likes to drop pass! likes to drive play from the middle but is also capable of getting pucks off the boards. he needs a finisher on his wing. i could pull up stats here, there are stats to be pulled up, but i know this in my HEART from watching dozens of kings games: he would have had 10-15 more points easily if he wasn’t stapled to the 3rd line and had better finishers. many times i watched him tee up a very good opportunity only for his guy to miss the net or fan or just get knocked off the puck
individually, he thrives in front of the net. his ass is fat and he’s about to use it to screen the goalie. hes good at catching loose pucks in the crease to send them home <3 see his performance at worlds. he scored basically all of his goals right up there!!
most media coverage/narratives will tell you his point production dropped off bc of effort (which is true) but even the MOST resentful kings watchers will say pld wasn’t given his best shot playing with inexperienced+fringe nhlers, being line shuffled the moment he got a bit comfortable, and also not getting ANY net front time on the lak pp. i factor this into all my judgements of his performance.
He’s def earned his diva rep LMAO!! this is personal opinion here but he seems like a sensitive and easily rattled little clam… like he will have a couple of bad shifts and if there’s nobody there to shake him out of it he’ll lose his grasp on the game and play like shit <3 a rolling joke on kingstwt was figuring out which PLD we were getting that game, and you could tell by his 5th if he was switched on or off!!
they hate him for this but EYE think this is nothing new for athletes and if he can consistently stay in the zone he’ll probably be pretty good. mental fortitude of a wet tissue my beloved….
moving onto the Vibes section!! he was always good humoured in media availability and didn’t shy away from scrums even when public opinion soured against him and critiques of both his hockey and his character had reached a fever pitch. i like this about him. he always gave authentic answers and tried his best to accomodate them, and never hid behind his captains.
he gets along quite well with teammates despite the narratives. no seriously!! some of the the kings had a hang out during off-season right before they went to worlds!! there’s bisexual lighting!!!!
there’s interviews from old jets teammates that are just like. “he used to turn up at my house with his dog and text IM HERE with no warning and that’s how we became friends” or “his obsession with euro soccer teams bewitched me”. he had control of the aux cord. he was a den mother and planned group gatherings. a genuine sweetheart to every teammate he’s ever had!!
I don’t think he’s some. idk. secret 100 point producing star 1C. but i truly believe with the right environment he’ll probably hit 60 points again.
thank you for your time if you made it this far and i hope to see you all in the trenches (caps lb) next season 👍
#i was HOOTING about this ask lol#anon if you’re out there… i hope this answered your question!!#anyway caps girlies if you want the vibe check on pld and what you’re getting that ISNT filtered through ten million layers of#I Don’t Watch The Kings But—#and clickbait articles/videos from people who have to pump out content so they can make money off gambling sponsorships HERE YOU GO!!#pierre luc dubois#asks#anon#washington capitals#caps lb#primers#<- does this count. it counts now#and fyi i am NOT just her because of pld i am also sentimental about your prospect ryan leon-rd <3 i was excited to see if he would#de-commit from bc next season!!
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you are genuinely such a cool freaking person whenever i see your art i get super happy... i Love the way you draw limbs and eyes especially. it just feels Nostalgic in a way. if that makes sense? i feel like if i ate your art it would taste like sourdough bread which i loove sourdough its so yummy. your art would be yummy
not to mention you are just isnanely nice?? like i wish i could be as nice as you but i am such an angry person that i cant. i aspire to be like you one day truly and i hope you know that you are a wonderful person and a wonderful artist
well you have delivered a sourdough loaf of friendliness. which is great, i like sourdough with some olive oil.
but the second paragraph in particular really hit me when i saw it yesterday. like i had to think about it for a hot minute.
i hope it serves as any sort of reassurance that i struggle with anger management as well. i’ve struggled with it all my life. it took me a very long time to learn self control, and i still struggle to control myself sometimes. but i think what helped me coexist with this issue is allowing myself to be understood by, well, myself. because when you have a problem like this, it’s not really in your control. and it’s never shallow. it will always be deeply rooted in something. and that’s what you need to understand. anger comes from fear and pain. you cannot blame yourself for being hurt and afraid. when you feel angry, that is you trying to protect yourself, because you are scared. and when you grow up in traumatic circumstances, this anger will feel so much bigger than you. you’ll always instinctually want to protect yourself, because you’ve been hurt so drastically, you don’t want it to happen again. this isn’t your fault. you are just a human person. shunning yourself for things you can’t control will result in self resentment, which will make you angrier… because you don’t understand yourself... i’ve adopted the sentiment of telling myself “because you are a person” every time i question any strong emotions i feel. humans are the most emotionally complex creatures on this planet. do not boil yourself down to anger, that won’t help you heal at all. and obviously anger can’t prevent you from having kindness in your heart. hell, you took time out of your day to be kind to me! you also saw kindness within me, another person. the beauties you see in this world are a reflection of what you are capable of becoming, and that’s a whole other can of existential worms that would require 7 extra paragraphs to elaborate on. sorry if this was nonsensical it was kind of emotional for me haha. we’re all sensitive people and that’s fine. you’re fine. a vulnerable soul is a strong soul. we’re gonna be fine
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off topic but also on topic its so clear that the genshin/star rail (saying both cause theres a large overlap) have no capability of thinking.
there are so many fics where *reader* somehow becomes a (sex)slave or is forced to do horrible shit and just general dead dove behavior. the fact that the author used INGAME LORE, CANON BACKSTORY FOR THE CHARACTER proves how braindead so many people are.
like people try to free slaves/captors in media isnt a new thing. theres a lot of art of that angelhusk ship where one gambles for the others freedom (never watched it but its an example)
like having slaves/captors in media isnt new and never has been but the only reason people truely care is because its a hoyoverse game and cant handle anything darker or complex then a PG rating
(sorry anon, I got carried away with this one tee-hee)
YOU'RE SO REAL FOR THIS!!! y'know I was sooo confused when people started screaming for blood when the authors are using his IN-GAME LORE in their fics and then claims that the people who enjoyed writing those have "white-knight syndrome" like cmon sjsadhjg you're giving me a fucking stroke.
I'll say it again, wanting to give slave aventurine or someone a better life DOESN'T mean they have "white-knight syndrome" when they have good intentions!!! We were all were crying for him and his tragic past, we all wanted to comfort him, and we at some point also wished for his salvation and the betterment of his life. These people need to stop throwing these "white-knight syndrome" accusations cuz it's definitely not about that. And like you said, it was his IN-GAME LORE. I already expected some authors to write about reader saving him from his slavery and there's nothing wrong with that! Cuz please, don't tell me you won't help the guy out of his abusive owner, let's be fr here.
Like you also said, many have been writing yandere/heavy dark themes about reader being literally SA'd and R'd by said character (do not tell me you guys haven't read all those fics where Aven was our debt collector and in paying our debt, he noncon or manipulated us into sleeping with him 💀) and now they wanna talk about morals?
And please, don't even try bringing up Romania or irl people in here. IT'S A FICTIONAL RACE IN A FICTIONAL STORY. it may be "inspired" like they said, but it's not directly addressing Romania!!
I get their point alright, I truly do. Like I said in my other post, I do not condone the sex slave! aus about aventurine and the master/slave bdsm cuz his story truly hurt me and I'm uncomfortable sexualizing his slavery when I know about his story and what happened to him as a slave. But I won't go as far as to actually send death threats to those authors and act like a hypocrite💀 people can write what they want to write and I don't have to read those writings if I don't wanna.
Just to say, I'm a yandere/dark-content enjoyer as well, it's just that I draw the line when it comes to aventurine cuz I just wanna cuddle and dote on that man and give him all the love and affection in the world. but like I said, am no hypocrite as well. (sorry if I can't explain it very well but I hope you get the gist of it)
It's just funny and baffling how people are like "eww this person wrote a fic about reader buying slave aventurine so they can be a good owner to him".... this is leaving me speechless how they turned an act with good intentions into something malicious... that poor author doesn't even have bad intentions when writing that fic.
When you apply their logic, it's like saying "this person adopted an abused child so that they can be a good parent to that child, disgusting" do they even realize how stupid they sound??? 😭
#aventurine x reader#I just cannot with this#y'all giving me a headache with this one#funny how they turned a person's good intention into something malicious
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i can’t tell you enough how much i love blind lucy au. i am the 0# defender that she should’ve at least lose sight of one eye, and your au is just so ARRRGH im so in love with it. please give me more I CANT GET ENOUGH NATSU IS SO SOFT WITH HER
also, how is she in the battle now? And, not because she is blind but because of what happened, Natsu is more protective of her? Does Wendy felt bad that she couldn’t give Lucy her sight back? (also im thinking of her touching natsu’s face just to remember his face and 😭)
So happy you like it!!
And to answer your questions, I've been thinking a lot about what you just asked me! I can't really figure out how she would fight now without her sight, but I'm thinking about it.
Natsu is def more protective of her, but it was more prominent the first months after losing her sight, wich I think it's a really natural response (knowing how protective he is of her, and feeling like he broke the promise he made her of protecting her future).
About Wendy, yeah, as part of the angst, I picture her feeling guilty for not been capable of bringing her eyes back. Not feeling worthy to show herself to the guild, Natsu and Lucy. (obviously no one blames her, but you know how wendy is, my sweet girl)
And about Lucy touching natsu's face, if you don't mind, I want to draw that in the future because is absolutely adorable and I completely forgot blind people actually do that lmao.
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What is one head canon you have for every individual member of the chain?
only one headcanon for each of them? 🥺
Time: I’ve definitely said this one before, but he is not at all trying to be fatherly. He does care about the boys a lot, but his fatherly actions are all completely unintentional, he has no idea some of them look up to him like a dad, and he has yet to realize he looks at some of them as his kids. In his mind he’s just being kind and brotherly. He has a hard time expressing emotions and seriously struggles with facial expressions, which is why he comes off as so hard to approach and seems more responsible and dad like, but that’s not the case at all. He’s just as chaotic as the others and seriously is oblivious to how some of them look up to him
Warriors: I headcanon he comes from a family of tailors (which is a headcanon ive seen before) who own a small shop in the little village he comes from (he’s not originally a city boy to me, he became a city boy later in life). His family also owns a small farm and he had big dogs growing up. Had the war never happened he’d probably still be with them, taking over his mom’s shop because he was the one most interested in it (i also headcanon he has a lot of siblings)
Twilight: He needs people to take care of or he won’t take care of himself. He just falls into such a slump if there’s no one for him to look after because he feels useless and unneeded. He’s a serious hoverer when one of the others are injured but he feels bad for hovering so he ends up sitting on the opposite side of camp looking like a wet dog and it’s just so sad looking 😭
Sky: I know a lot of people make him super sleepy or give him asthma because of his low stamina in Skyward Sword and also because he just always seems tired in that game, but for me Sky has epilepsy, and that’s why he has periods of time where he’s just absolutely exhausted
Hyrule: Not afraid of much and has a stomach of steel. This kid will eat anything and everything and will be completely fine. Bonus extra headcanon: I think he’s older than Legend
Legend: I headcanon he’s autistic and struggles to control the tone of his voice, and that’s why he can come off pretty harsh. He doesn’t mean to, he’s seriously pretty chill (unless Warriors is involved), but he can come off as disinterested or snappy when he really doesn’t mean to
Wild: Actually extremely good at handling his emotions and dealing with problems (compared to the others). He knows he gets overwhelmed and while he’s not the best at telling someone where he goes to blow off steam, he knows how to hold himself back and handle himself, and he’s perfectly capable of defending himself if something happens when he goes off alone. Sometimes he just needs to be alone, and if he really CANT be alone because it’s too dangerous, Wolfie will trail after him just for backup and keep his distance
Four: BIG reader, he loves to curl up with a good book but it’s hard for him to get his alone time to focus on what he’s reading while he’s traveling with the others. He will make up stories in his head when he can’t sleep or actually focus, and he’s a really animated story teller. He’s told a lot of campfire stories and when he’s doing those it’s one of the very few times the others actually shut up
Wind: Dyslexic and seriously struggles to read, but he absolutely LOVES to draw and would doodle all the time during any lessons anyone tried to give him ever. Give this kid a sketchbook and he’ll literally draw you a masterpiece. He loves sketching scenery and the others and he’s FREAKY good at it
#jes talks#jes ask#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu time#lu warriors#lu twilight#lu sky#lu hyrule#lu legend#lu wild#lu four#lu wind#lu headcanons#jes headcanons
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so . i did something ^}*#*}*%+%
(more parts might come and if that happens this post will be the masterlist)
ramble ⏬
so . ok here goes nothing. first things first.
this is like the “fisherman meets mermaid and they are in love” AU trope but jamil isnt a fisherman: he pretty much retained his canon life, aka he is a servant and one day he found a merman and he just hangs around him to escape from his shitty life situation (and the merman is completey enamoured).
so, apart of NRC not happening, more details about the canon divergence should be revealed at a later date
thiat is the info about the au out of the way. ill just do personal rambling here esp bevause im insecure about some things about this so you can stop reading if you want.
this is a trope ive seen around a lot, especially on twitter, so ive had this idea since a bunch of months ago. i then proceeded to forget about it until i saw a twitter post about this same exact trope again except it was with fucking miguel o’hara but thats besides the point. the original post that made me get the idea were 2 ocs (they had the blood-cut-to-call-merman idea. I completely stole it from that. im coming clean) and i was like ��wow do you know who else is a mermaid? azul fucking ashengrotto”
ok so no the art style i used. i started using it really recently to doodle stuff, since 2 days ago actually im so serious. i tried using it here as well bevause its an easy art style, really quick to draw with it and also looks good. or so i thought. because im now having doubts about wether it looks good or not and i fear it might just look weird. i kinda wanna hear if people prefer this art style or my “actual” one from my other posts
this style looked way better when i used it to doodle stuff, but i dont think im capable of using it in comic format. the style i was going for is mostly evident in the colored “poster” because ive actually redrawn the comic sequence a bunch of times so the style was lost there. I do like how the “poster” looks but im not sure if y’all would agree so id love to hear wyt
now the biggest part. ive never made comics in my life!! so these are going to look so damn akward. u can already notice it here!!!!! crowd starts booing
also i cant draw water and also i dont know how to draw azuls octo patterns bc the material we have of his design are so vague and fragmented but his patterns are not easy to draw so im struggling and i need to make a reference of him for myself 😭😭
#what…. tag do i give this au?#it doesnt even have a name#i genuinely have no idea but ill have to add a tag for this au later#azujami mermaid au??? that sounds lame#suggestions r apprecieated#twst#twisted wonderland#u can tell im fucking sturggling#azujami#jamiazu#ashenviper#azul ashengrotto#jamil viper#art tag#posting this and throwing my phone across the room and never picking it up again for the next 48 hours
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Hello, I've just read loads of your posts/metas/HCs and I love them - especially your character analysis! I have to confess my favourite has always been Tonks and after reading your post about her and Snape and how they relate to each other, I can't get out of my head how good Tonks/Snape/Lupin relationship might be! Do you have any HCs or thoughts about what a relationship for them might look like?
Please don't feel like you need to answer if this is a topic that doesn't interest you - but if it is, I'd love to know your take!
Severus and Remus both push people away from them. - Severus is a grumpy sod that pushes down emotion. He pushes people away so they can't become problems. - Remus has his grumpy sod moments - but mainly pushes people away so he can't become a problem and hurt them.
Neither of them can trust other people not to hurt them, so they close off their hearts.
Tonks is a magnet that draws people in. She is a worm, a parasite, an expert in squirming into the most protected hearts and softens them. A grumpy-sod whisperer.
- She drags the emotion out of Snape effortlessly. She is someone he knows he can (mostly) trust to be competent. - She is strong enough to resist Remus' pushing and to soothe his worries of being a burden: she can handle him. - She can adapt herself to what people need, she cares about how they feel and she won't easily fold.
Remus 🤝 Dora 🤝 Severus
Normally Severus and Remus repel eachother - but as they are softened by Tonks… they soften to eachother, too. Because deep down they have alot in common, their flaws compliment eachother - once they get past that first hurdle of actually getting to know eachother.
The one thing Tonks cant do for Severus is know what he has been through. Know what his life has been like, what he has had to do, what being naturally despised and a double-agent abandoned by everyone you love is like. What it's like to be alone. To hit rock bottom and scrape against it… and always fear losing everything and falling down there again. Remus knows that… and he loves soothing people. He loves being soft, wise, gentle - and useful.
The one thing Tonks can't do for Remus is convince him he is needed. He thinks she is biased. Capable, strong, intelligent - too good, he is dragging her down. Their whole relationship has been her trying, insisting, pleading - with small spurts of what he would call 'being weak' where he folds. But SHE can't convince him that isn't 'being weak'. Other people need to - it has to come from outside, someone he can't pass off by saying 'they don't understand the reality of his condition and situation.' His depression, anxiety and trauma makes him a little delusional. He can't just be brought to water, he needs to be FORCED to drink. (Harry did a good job of this.) Tonks can't do that. She is in the wrong position for it - and she is just a little too soft to handle him so roughly. Severus wouldn't struggle to grab him by the scruff of the neck and hold his head under. To drag him home.
- Remus is weak willed - supported by Tonks, but kept in line by Severus. Remus can't give Tonks stability in their relationship. Severus not only can - but he can enforce it. - Severus can't give Tonks an open heart, not without her working hard for it. But Remus can. - And they can draw it out of eachother - if not for themselves, then FOR HER.
Like I've always liked Snupin but struggle to see it as particularly 'domestic'. They're both standoffish. In a relationship would be interesting: finding being alone together a comfort. But with a third? With Tonks as their anchor? The foundation? Not only could they both orbit around her - I think it would bring them together better, too.
Going from bickering and only withstanding eachother in the same room for Tonks sake… ...to them both cuddled on the couch, watching a documentary or something, waiting for her to get home. They go from teasing her "What do you even see in that guy…?" To having their own slow-burn romance right infront of her.
Going from: Remus 🤝 Dora 🤝 Severus to: Dora 🤝 🤝 Remus 🤝 Severus
...and like imagine the sex
Anyway I really like poly ships for Remus - because he is such a fucking handful. He needs a whole support structure to just stay with Tonks in canon - so slipping a third, fourth, whatever into their structure just... makes sense. He is a complex guy with many issues that aren't easily supported. He can't just have a mate. He needs a pack.
A little different to the ask: but If you want a cute poly fic between Remus, Tonks, Sirius and a cute OC @black-occamy has a really sweet one on AO3 :) (I hope they don't mind me sharing it)
#hp#severus snape#remus lupin#love you remus#remus my beloved#nymphadora tonks#snupin#remadora#What is their three way ship name?#stonks#i prefer Snonks personally lol#whats the ship name for all three of them...?#tonks/snape/lupin#remadora... snupin... hm...#snupadora#???#headcannon#mywrite#poly#polyamory
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diu ghost au character notes
long post incoming
I'm going to list all the main diu characters and their roles in the ghost au!
Josuke higashikata: Ghost. possesses crazy diamond, a stand which barely works on the spirit realm but is his main way of interacting with physical reality
Jotaro kujo: the same jotaro we know and love, capable of seeing ghosts sometimes.
Koichi Hirose: a medium who can percieve the spirit realm after being brought back from near-death by josuke. still has echoes.
Okuyasu nijimura: recently dead, bonds with josuke over his predicament. Since he tries to ignore the fact that he's dead, The Hand doesn't work whatsoever in the spirit realm and only affects physical reality.
Rohan Kishibe: The exact same, but heavens door FULLY works on ghosts now (shows post death memories). however similarly to jotaro he can only see ghosts sometimes
Reimi sugimoto: Mostly the same. she is very close to josuke, and helped him navigate the spirit world when he was younger, despite not being able to leave the alley due to the circumstances of her death. still gets the final blow on kira.
Hayato Kawajiri: same as canon but he becomes able to see ghosts after being affected by btd.
NOTE ON BTD: its loops do NOT AFFECT THE SPIRIT WORLD! HOWEVER. it does "strengthen the boundary." Josuke and okuyasu cannot contact anyone but hayato while BTD is in effect, which makes it difficult to transfer info between loops.
Yoshikage Kira: The same, but more spiritual. he has been acutely aware of the existence of vengeful ghosts for a long time, so he subtly incorporates protective sigils and such into all of his clothing. The inside of his house is UTTERLY COATED IN TALISMANS, so much so that no spirit except for his father can draw near it. it's like a natural blind spot to them. HE'S like a blind spot to them. and even if they see him, they physically CANT APPROACH HIM. he has to give this up when he's mimicking kosaku, which is why BTD cuts ghosts off from being able to communicate with the living.
Joseph: hermit purple can see ghosts. enough said. genuinely upset that his son died and he didn't even know
Tomoko: very depressed, as the loss of her father brought up a lot of emotions from the unhealed wound of her son's early death. actually gets to know jotaro and is aware of the supernatural happenings to some degree.
Tamami (the lock guy): EXACTLY THE SAME
Hazamada: exactly the same, but with no josuke around, he decides to target the weird blond 20-something (keicho) he sees around jotaro. he is promptly thrashed.
. Yukako: Covert occult nerd. koichi tells her that he sees ghosts to try and weird her out, and she immediately starts to adore him even more. she's more friendly with the other duwang gang members than she is in canon- her and keicho of all people go to tonio's in liue of josuke and okuyasu. helps thrash kira.
Tonio: the same, thankfully.
Shigechi: the same, but he's slightly better at seeing ghosts than the average stand user, sees josuke and okuyasu by the owson, and proceeds to do a lotto scam with them similarly to canon. he moves on when he dies, and his death is especially scary to josuke and okuyasu in this: since he was still in pain while Ascending, it means that KIRA CAN BASICALLY KILL GHOSTS.
Aya: The same. also moves on when she dies.
Mikitaka: almost the same....josuke and okuyasu are just doing some ghostly wandering, and this guy can See Them! But he can't see stands. What?????
(the tiers go like this: Regular reality-> stand plane-> spirit world. stands are small outcroppings of the spirit world basically. all stand users can see stands, and most can see PART of the spirit world, but only some can see all of it. Also, if there were any non-stand-user mediums, they'd be able to see stands as auras. it's basically unheard of for someone to be able to see parts of the spirit world but have no perception of stands)
Yuya: The same. Hospitals are thin boundary areas, as is the tunnel. i think it would be funny if he could smell ghosts too. highway star can chase ghosts and steal their energy, which doesn't heal yuya but makes HS stronger, so there's still a threat for josuke in the chase scene. anyway he still tries to kill rohan and gets thrashed by ghostsuke, and ghostsuke still comes to get his help in the enigma arc. his fangirls just think he's high off of pain meds or having an episode of icu psychosis when he starts talking to no one and then “throws himself out of the window”.
Angelo: Jotaro just kills him outright. it's easy with timestop.
Keicho: as i said, he lives instead of okuyasu. he is experiencing immense regret over that. he ends up becoming an ally to jotaro and the others: initially, it's out of righting his wrongs and creating the stand user who killed his brother, but it grows to be more than that. odd friendship with yukako. can't see ghosts, not even a little bit. Akira: Keicho kills him so hard before he even gets within 3 miles of joseph. does not move on after he dies. beef with okuyasu in the afterlife and by beef i mean an awful full out ghost fight that causes a power outage. okuyasu wins and akira retreats, tail between his legs, going to go hide in the wires somewhere.
Bug eaten: Not a threat. akira did not even have a chance to use the arrow. it's terrifying how FAST keicho went.
Yoshihiro kira: exact same, was already a ghost
Ken oyanagi: exact same.
Stray cat: Already a ghost, in a way. still becomes friends with okuyasu
Toyohiro: died when trying to leave superfly and became part of it. since mikitaka can see ghosts, the arc proceeds as normal
Terunosuke: I bounced around a couple of ideas, but eventually settled on the timeless position of "he was a book who became guy"/ref. a normal spirit of a teenage boy who died a couple years before the story began, somehow bound to a very old library book. He was given a stand strong enough to give him a full physical form. he uses enigma as normal on tomoko, koichi, and yuya, and seals josuke briefly in the book that he is normally tethered to. (like in canon, he uses tomoko to bait josuke out.) yuya unfolds koichi, and koichi loosens the seal. josuke realizes that terunosuke is Also a ghost and shoves him back into the book. since he can hear terunosuke scream this time, he feels maybe 5% more guilty about it
Masazo: Same as canon, but he's haunting rohan's house afterwards
#I’m not tagging everyone sorry lol#Diu ghost au#Basically the premise of this is josuke didn’t survive Stand fever and has grown up as a ghost in the spirit realm
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