#i love comics i love exploring body language

[contact-guy]

the last Sign of the Four comic is so long and I am dying (I chose this) so have some contextless panels of Holmes being characteristically weird about physical affection

[bamfkeeper]

Cooking with Kurt.

RQ: 'So, I’ve been thinking lately about cute ideas, and one of them is about cooking. Could you write a head-cannons (or a fic if you like the idea and want to be more in-depth) of Kurt and the Reader cooking? Kurt teaches the reader how to make certain German foods, and the Reader teaches Kurt some tricks too. Just the two bonding over cooking and praising and complimenting each other for their good jobs. I just find this to be adorable since cooking is a great way to share cultures and bond 🥧😋.' - @hulkingharbor

pairing: Kurt Wagner x GN!reader | warnings: None

a/n: Stuck with headcannons because those are easy for me to write up. I have been neglecting this blog a bit I'm so sorry. I wanted to get some stuff out before I left for my trip. Unedited.

Kurt was over the moon when you expressed interest in his German heritage. Your curiosity about his roots had always been genuine, but when the topic turned to cuisine, his excitement reached new heights. The prospect of sharing his culinary traditions with you filled him with joy.

He saw cooking and baking together as a meaningful way to connect and create lasting memories, it was one of his love languages for sure.

The kitchen became a space where cultural exchange and personal bonding intertwined. Kurt's eyes would light up as he described the myriad of German dishes he was eager to introduce you to, each recipe carrying a story or a cherished memory from his past.

From hearty sauerbraten to delicate apfelstrudel, he had an extensive repertoire of flavors he couldn't wait to explore with you.

Kurt stood beside you, his lean body adorned with a whimsical apron that seemed almost comically out of place on his athletic frame.

His nimble fingers worked the dough with practiced ease, kneading it into submission. "I am beyond thrilled to be baking with you, liebe," he exclaimed, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. "This is something I've been longing to do for quite some time now."

His golden eyes sparkled with joy as he spoke, his hands never ceasing their rhythmic motion on the precious dough. Meanwhile, you busied yourself with the task of slicing apples, the crisp sound of the knife against the cutting board.

"You look absolutely ridiculous," you chuckled affectionately, your eyes crinkling with mirth as you took in the sight of him in his frilly apron. The appearance of his muscular form and the dainty kitchen wear was too amusing to ignore.

Kurt was never one to back down from playful banter, he responded by sticking out his tongue at you in a childish gesture. His graceful tail swished mischievously behind him. You noticed that the tip of his tail had somehow managed to acquire a light dusting of flour.

Before you could react, his tail flicked swiftly in your direction, sending a small cloud of white powder flying towards you. It landed on your nose, a tiny puff of it exhaling as you snorted.

Kurt's laughter filled your ears, and you picked up some flour to combat him, his hands went up as he playfully begged you not to. "Nein! Nein, liebe! Flour and my fur do not mix!"

His pleading didn't deter you.

Flour collided with him and you both began a play fight of tossing the white ingredient at each other until you were covered in it.

Besides your little food fight, you both learned how to cook each others favorite meals. Kurt gladly taught you special recipes, and you baked delicious cookies and made warm meals to eat together.

You were surprised at how hearty his meals were, despite him being fairly lean. He blamed it on his metabolism.

Kurt loves to cook you food. Whenever you request a dish, he gets right on it and is so proud of the outcome. He always does his best and is very specific about the ingredients he uses. It has to be fresh and perfect for you.

Cooking and baking together became a cherished ritual, a delightful exploration of flavors and cultures. You take turns introducing each other to your respective backgrounds, eagerly sharing family recipes and cooking techniques passed down through generations.

The kitchen becomes a messy playground of creativity as you collaborate on fusion dishes, blending elements from both your culinary heritage.

Kurt's enthusiasm for cultural exchange is endearing, his natural curiosity and open-mindedness make him an eager student of diverse traditions and customs. He approaches each new experience with childlike wonder, whether it's trying an exotic spice or learning a traditional method of cooking. He's always ready to sample new dishes, no matter how unfamiliar.

Kurt's eyes always light up as he tastes your food. "Mein Gott, liebling! This food is absolutely wunderbar!" he exclaims, his voice filled with genuine awe. He affectionately nuzzles his head against yours, his tail instinctively curling around your waist to draw you closer.

The gesture of his tail is protective and intimate, a habit he formed long ago and you never broke it from him. "You must write down this recipe for me. I'd love to surprise you with it someday when you least expect it."

You can't help but smile at his enthusiasm, your heart warming at his sincere appreciation. "Of course, I'll write it down for you," you assure him, your voice soft with affection. "But I expect detailed instructions for all your culinary masterpieces too."

Turning in his embrace, you wrap your arms around his shoulders, your fingers tracing the unique patterns of his skin. "After all, I need something to tide me over when you're away on missions. Can't have me pining away with an empty stomach, can we?"

A mischievous grin spreads across Kurt's face, his golden eyes twinkling with a mixture of humor and desire. He leans in close, his lips barely brushing against yours as he speaks. The feather-light touch sends a shiver down your spine, igniting a familiar warmth in your core.

"Oh, liebling," he purrs, his accented voice dropping to a seductive whisper. "When have I ever left you wanting for anything? I always make sure you're well-satisfied in every possible way~"

Thanks for reading.

*BAMF*

Dividers by @/adornedwithlight | Images found on Pinterest, I did not look for the specific comic Kurt's pic is from.

[flameswallower]

THE BEST FICTION I ENCOUNTERED IN THE SECOND HALF OF 2024!!!

A much longer follow-up to this post. (Can you imagine how much I'd need to type out if I hadn't split them up???)

Once again, I'm not listing movies, TV shows, video games, etc. I AM listing some web fiction and comics/graphic novels, because I feel much more qualified to judge and recommend those things.

____

Novels and Novellas!

Failure To Comply, by Cavar (2024): Reading Cavar’s Failure to Comply, I couldn’t help but think of the recent David Cronenberg movie Crimes of the Future. Both deal with dystopias in which bodies and their modification are strictly regulated, and people with unauthorized bodies form a vibrant, perpetually imperiled subculture on the margins. Both use this conceit to speak metaphorically about the plights of trans and disabled people, although Failure to Comply’s characters are also presented as literally, textually disabled and trans. But, although Crimes of the Future is often accused of being a “weird movie,” Failure to Comply is undeniably much, much weirder. Cronenberg is super normal compared to this.

Maej, by Dale Stromberg (2024): a doorstopper I found difficult to put down and finished inside a week; a work of very unapologetic genre fiction that’s equally unapologetic in its intelligence and dedication to doing strange, creative things with language; a high fantasy story I actually liked. The setting is the city of Sforre-Yomn, in the country of Hwoama, whose culture combines elements from across the continents of Asia and Europe. But Hwoama is matriarchal: men are subordinate to women, who dominate politics, business, the military, and nearly all other professions. As a result of this fact, almost all the major characters in the novel are female. By turns this presents a fun, simple, mischievous inversion of maleness as the unmarked default state for fictional characters, and meaty commentary on the social construction of sex, sexuality, and gender. Stromberg has cited Le Guin as an influence on Maej and, in the most complimentary way possible, this influence is evident.

Lote, by Shola von Reinhold (2020) is a gorgeous, funny, moving academic satire/mystery and love letter to Black modernism. It’s also very queer/trans and (in my personal opinion, perhaps not intentionally) very autistic. The title refers to a possibly-mythical clandestine circle of artists/magic practitioners who style themselves after the lotus eaters and seek transcendence via experiences of sensory and aesthetic pleasure. As with many novels that stand out to me, you won’t read anything else like it. I especially recommend this one if you want a completely unique, intellectually stimulating work of fiction, but are put off by the aggressively experimental and opaque style of Failure To Comply and by the SFF-ness of FTC, Maej, and Leech.

Walking Practice, by Dolki Min (trans. Victoria Caudle) (original 2022; English translation 2024) is a breezy, sexy *, gender-bending Korean novel about a poor amorphous space alien stranded on Earth after a spaceship crash. Unfortunately for us, this alien soon discovers that 1.) the most suitable food for it down here is human flesh, and 2.) with a lot of pain and effort, it can squeeze itself into the likeness of a variety of different human beings. It figures out hookup apps pretty fast, too, and then it’s off to the races. This may sound like creature horror, but it plays more as an exploration of identity and humanity, and a satire of sex, romance, and contemporary hookup culture. (*possibly less sexy if you don’t have a vore/cannibalism/consumption thing)

Love/Aggression, by June Martin (2024) is a BANANAS mundane fantasy-comedy about two trans women who are kind of best friends, and kind of enemies. Zoe (actress) is an arrogant, cartoonishly unpleasant minor celebrity who thinks she’s much more famous and popular than she actually is— but Martin manages to show how her personality is in part the sympathetic result of dysphoria and experiencing a lot of transmisogyny over the course of her life, and how she used to be a much kinder person before fame went to her head. Meanwhile, Lily (freeloader and aspiring tattoo artist) is a sweet, spacy, passive daydreamer, and a far more immediately likable character— but Martin manages to show how she is not entirely blameless in the ongoing drama with Zoe, how her passivity is sometimes the result of immaturity and selfishness, and how even when it isn’t, it’s a character flaw that keeps landing her in situations which kind of suck for all parties involved. They live in a magical Pittsburgh that is, conveniently, located right next to Los Angeles. Their friends include a BDSM cult leader and a nonbinary person whose name becomes “Dicks” in the first chapter of the story and who is never called anything else. (This character also happens to be the…owner? Custodian?…of an infinite, maze-like, reality-distorting building that is probably the most fun and least scary infinite, maze-like, reality-distorting building in all of fiction.) There’s vore in this one, too! But don’t go in expecting a particularly cohesive plot: Love/Aggression is far more about characters, relationships, and gags.

Maybe the Moon, by Armistead Maupin (1992) was inspired by the too-brief life of Maupin’s real friend Tamara De Treaux, a little person who depicted the title character in parts of the movie E.T. Her literary equivalent, Cady Roth, is a sardonic, fashionable, thirty-year-old little person who depicted a magical gnome called Mr. Woods in a beloved, albeit treacly, children’s fantasy movie of the same name. But since she played the role inside a thick rubber suit, and since the director of the movie felt it would spoil the magic to give her any credit, almost nobody knows that. Ten years later, she lives in obscurity on dwindling funds and struggles to find work…until, out of sheer desperation, she decides to take a job with a troupe of children’s birthday party entertainers. Romance, escapades, etc. ensue. Both a very funny book and a very sad one; it’s quite frank about death, about the ways Hollywood fucks people over, about the many ways that, especially if you’re marginalized and/or an artist, your life isn’t fair and isn’t ever going to be fair and “happy endings” probably aren’t what the world has in store for you. I think ultimately it’s sentimental in a good way; it has a big heart.

Leech, by Hiron Ennes (2022) is a total banger to finish out this year with! So glad I picked it up finally! Absolute genre jambalaya, this one: sci-fi, stuff that reads as fantasy despite having or probably having a “sci-fi” explanation, horror, Gothic novel (but not, crucially, a Gothic romance), mystery, medical thriller, character study, philosophical novel about ideas of consciousness, selfhood, individuality, and free will…there’s probably something in here for everyone reading this. You’ll love it, almost guaranteed, if you love the Gormenghast books. You’ll love it, almost guaranteed, if you love any Star Trek series. You’ll love it, almost guaranteed, if you love the science fiction of Peter Watts, or the horror of Gretchen Felker-Martin. You’ll love it, almost guaranteed, if you love The Thing (1982). The prose is lush, idiosyncratic, a bit purple, but it’s nothing too baroque, it’s all perfectly easy to read. The complicated, antiheroic protagonist/narrator is delightful and memorable, and I think Ennes did a great job at conveying unusual states of memory/selfhood/cognition through it/them/her. (Some of these states are not ones with which I have, or even could possibly have ever had, real experience, but some are, and I am always pleased to find those replicated in ways I can recognize and feel as “truthful.”)

Short Story Collections!

Stone Gods (2024) and Worse Than Myself (2009) by Adam Golaski contained several of the very best short stories I read this year— especially Worse Than Myself, which is also a slightly more accessible/“normal” story collection and the one I’d recommend starting with. Golaski writes eerie, dreamlike, bizarre fiction that frequently crosses over into horror— even including time-worn horror genre tropes like zombies, ghosts, and vampires. But let me tell you, Golaski’s “The Man From the Peak” (in Worse Than Myself) is a BAD time, like give-you-nightmares scary, and it feels like nothing you’ve ever read before, even though it’s about A Nosferatu. Not just a vampire, but a vampire that is explicitly described as egg-bald with big pointy ears and two sharp buck teeth. That’s the antagonist. And it fucking works. He makes it new. Please, please read Adam Golaski, you guys. It is astounding and unjust that he’s not popularly regarded as one of the 21st century’s best authors of weird short fiction. I don’t actually know if he could have/wanted to publish more than two collections over fifteen years, but I kind of feel like maybe if a lot of people and public libraries buy those two collections, he’ll have more space and incentive to write short stories, and/or more publishers will be interested in picking up another collection of his short stories?

Brave New Weird vol. 2 (2024) was a diverse, entertaining selection of stories. Some I’d read, some I hadn’t. A pretty good overview of the mostly small press horror/sci-fi/Weird fiction scene as it stands right this minute.

All Your Friends Are Here, by M. Shaw (2024) is almost the opposite of the Golaski collections, in a way: Golaski frequently deals with themes of nostalgia, the past, cycles that repeat without end, and timelessness or being outside of time. Moreover, most of his stories feel like they’d be immediately comprehensible to a person fifty years ago or fifty years from now, if not even further into the past/future (with, perhaps, a few footnotes of cultural explanation). But Shaw’s stories are, often aggressively, Of The Moment. And that’s not a bad thing, even if it means they may seem completely dated in a few decades. Shaw is interested in speaking directly to their place and time; directly to us. They’re not going to pretend we’re not all online, that we don’t all know (if against our will) what Ready Player One is— the longest piece in the collection, and one of the best, is a suitably pop-culture-reference-laden dunk/riff/spoof on, and rebuttal of, Ready Player One! These stories are angry and clever and sometimes suffused with a kind of exhausted tenderness. There’s clearly a Bizarro influence on some of Shaw’s work, but their writing is more sophisticated and restrained than what I tend to associate with Bizarro fiction proper.

Individual Short Stories (That You Can Read Right Now!)

“EGREGORE” by Samir Sirk Morató (2024) = clubbing, hallucinatory, girl on girl

“The Spindle Of Necessity” by B. Pladek (2024) = trans academic suspects dead author may have been a closeted gay trans man

“A History of the Avodion Through Five Artists” by Eric Horwitz (2024) = Borgesian, arch, Jewish

“Mad Studies” by Cavar (2024) = loneliness, cats, autism…like Failure To Comply, this is by @librarycards

“Alabama Circus Punk” by Thomas Ha (2024) = robots, the nuclear family, disintegrating language

Comics and Graphic Novels!

Tomorrow You Don't Know Me, by Raven Lyn Clemens (2024) is a subtle, moving, and unsentimental graphic novel about being a middle schooler with problems, and how sometimes those problems just kinda...persist no matter what you do or try or want, and no matter if it's fair. Even if you summon a demon to help you! Clemens is really skilled at depicting emotion visually, at communicating both the absurd goofiness and the deep, genuine pain of the outsize negative emotions her characters experience. All of her characters are at least a little wretched, and she also handles them all with great compassion, affection, and understanding. Check out her artwork at @ravenlynclemens please; it's fantastic cartooning even without any detailed narrative.

In Fair Verona, by Val Wise (2024) is a VERY gory, VERY nasty piece of lesbian Gothic fantasy horror-erotica. I love Wise's art. The bodies she draws, regardless of gender and build, are top-tier sexy and beautiful to me, which means he's often able to get me on board* with kinks and scenarios that would usually be too "extreme" for my taste. (*Genteel euphemism for arousal)

A Guest In the House, by E.M Carroll (2023) is an equally nasty and mean, but far, FAR less explicit and bizarre, lesbian Gothic horror story, told with the visual panache and inimitable art style everyone knows and loves Carroll for. It's a worthy successor to their previous material, and if it doesn't necessarily make enormous leaps from their earlier work in its writing, the drawing and coloring has gone from "already really good" to "some of these splash pages will blow your eyes out the back of your skull."

Expiry Date, by Sloane Hong (2024) is another lesbian/queer erotica comic. This one's science fiction, and is FAR more up my usual alley of kinks. Which is to say that the lovers are quite kind/polite with one another (in a lot of ways it reads as a meet-cute), but also one of them is a hired killer who dispassionately agrees to torture the fuck out of the other one David Cronenberg-style.

Once again, all my comic recs are by queer trans people! I think I made a pretty hacky joke last year about gay trans mascs specifically ruling in this field, but based on recent data, you just have to be a marginalized gender and not heterosexual to make amazing comics.

Web Fiction!

The Frenzy wiki is a fan wiki for an imagined TV series, telling the story of both Frenzy, a popular late 2000s ensemble cast drama-adventure-SFF show drawing equally from the likes of Twin Peaks and Supernatural, and how the existence of this show was mysteriously wiped from the face of our reality-- save in the troubled dreams of a select few. I would estimate it takes a couple hours to explore the whole wiki. (2022 or 2023?)

3D Workers Island is the phenomenal, if less ambitious, follow-up to Petscop. (I don't mean it's a sequel; it's just by the same guy and covers similar thematic ground.) Like its predecessor, it's more about dropping tantalizing hints than letting you in on "what's actually going on," and more about giving you a creeped out and vaguely depressed feeling than about scaring or shocking you per se. It's really smart and well-crafted in an understated way, and does a great job replicating early internet content. I would estimate it takes WELL under an hour to get through this story, although you will probably want to immediately go back and look for things you might have missed or not understood properly. (2024)

Martin's Movies is conventional, compared to the other two. It's a ghost story. But it's a very creepy, effective, well-told ghost story rendered through the unusual medium of letterboxd reviews (of course, these become increasingly diary-like and Not About The Film as the story progresses). I would estimate it takes under an hour to read the whole thing, it's like short novelette length. (2024)

[maximumqueer]

One Piece Reread - Ch.220

One of my favorite things about doing this reread is picking up on small stuff that I didn't notice the first time around. And these four pages

are one of them.

I love how we get no dialogue, and more importantly no internal dialogue throughout it, and yet we are still able to perfectly understand what Luffy, Zoro and Sanji are thinking and feeling (with the occasional aid of punctuation marks and ellipses.)

Luffy is deeply confused by his findings, not understanding what the strange bike-like contraption could even be used for. Zoro is annoyed that the sword he found is rusted through and not usable. And Sanji is deeply melancholic at finding a framed picture of a woman with a harpoon through it, clearly saddened by what could have caused the picture to be ruined. All done without spoken dialogue or thought bubbles.

I LOVE when comic artists/mangakas take full advantage of the media they are working in and have spreads like this. Where just the expressions on the characters faces and their body language tell the story. It also adds wonderfully to the tone of this scene. By not having any internal or external dialogue, it creates a feeling of reverence for the 200 year old wreak, like our characters are going back in time briefly by exploring its ghostly remnants. A tone that don't think would have worked without the silence.

It's also just nice to see pages like this not jam packed with thought bubbles. I have nothing against them and think they can be very useful, but I also think that they are oftentimes overused. Which is one of the reasons I like One piece so much. Oda uses thought bubbles sparingly, and opts out of them during moments where he doesn't find them necessary/doesn't think they would add anything to the scene.

[fablepaint]

Hi Fable! I’m a fan of the show, mini episodes and I’m excited for the full series! I have question regarding Rocky, is his tragic backstory going to be explored in the show, it was hinted at in the comic but with the comic on pause I’m curious if there would be more in the show. I feel so bad for him and even though he’s a completely fictional character, I relate to him. I grew up with mental illness and I understand what it’s like to be the odd one out, and would love to see him pull through.

Yes, but also you can read a lot into a character by their posture and body language. What they're doing.

What they're NOT doing.

That's part of the fun of fiction. It's like people watching, but you can watch them shit on the toilet without it being creepy and invasive.

As far as whether he will pull through...well...he's not exactly trading in popsicles. It's dirty work, and he's not above rolling in the mud.

[pianokantzart]

The brotherly moments are what I’m looking forward to the most for the sequel. I’m hoping we can potentially get a scene that will top the reunion scene. Are there certain kinds of brotherly love moments you’d like to see in the sequel?

Big same. What I'm most looking forward to is all the little subtle shows of affection: headlocks, side hugs, cap tugs, belly pokes, shoulder nudges, jabs, jostles... all the bits of body language that made their relationship feel so close and real in the first movie. And of course, the return of that silly little secret handshake.

Another thing I want to see is more of Mario's protectiveness. I know some are hoping that he gets a little overprotective after being separated from his bro in the first movie, but if we don't get that I want to at least see Mario's pre-adventure protectiveness.

Or the kind of protectiveness he exhibited in the Super Mario Adventures comics, where even though he's focused on the fight he always keeps an eye on his brother, and the moment Luigi calls out for help he immediately becomes first priority.

On the flip side, I want to see more of Luigi being the emotional support/voice of reason. He may be a ball of nerves in moments of peril, but he's proven to be very levelheaded overall. Since I picture the arc of the sequel being Mario slowly coming to embrace the role of a true hero– with all the responsibilities that come with it– it'd be nice if he had a low moment of feeling like a failure that Luigi talks him out of.

Now, if they're going to try and top the reunion scene in the first movie, there is one surefire way to do that: slow down. As good as that hug was, there was so much going on that it was hard to feel the full impact on the first watch. Quiet things down for a moment... pump the breaks... focus in on the facial expressions... let us really feel the hug. Throw in another forehead touch while you're at it.

But you know what I'm really really excited to see? Sword and shield fight dynamic. I desperately want to see them fighting side-by-side without the superstar! Give me Mario spearheading the charge while Luigi watches his blindside! Mario throwing himself mindlessly into a dangerous stunt so long as Luigi is there to catch him, Mario fighting in close combat while Luigi draws the target's attention with long-range attacks, both of them falling into perfect synch when they need to deliver an extra-powerful blow.

I am so aggressively obsessed with the idea of their character traits being fully exhibited and explored through the way they approach a fight, you have no idea.

[obsolescent]

Talkin’ Foolish

Pairing: Leon x Reader

Summary: You reminisce on some memorable moments with Leon

Content Warnings: No gendered language used for reader, adult themes, mentions of sex and sex toys, pure corniness and Leon being awkward and goofy as hell.

Author’s Note: This is so…I don’t know what this is but I wanted to have a break between the angst I’ve been writing. This is inspired by things my fiancée has said/done to me, lmao. I hope you enjoy it!

Words: 1,022

Read on Ao3

You’re used to it by now. Well…Maybe not.

There’s still some things that Leon says that makes your brain feel like it’s buffering, dial up tone and all, stuck on a loading screen as you try to catch up to what he’s said. You’re still surprised at what his mind conjures up.

He’s always had some cheesy, corny jokes he likes to use, but sometimes there’s some outta pocket, off the wall, quirky phrases and sentences he’s strung together, that you wonder how anyone could think of. Though you quickly realized it’s best not to underestimate Leon and his beautiful, unique mind.

There’s a few times that stick out more so than others.

Like one time, it’s late at night. You’ve eaten dinner, cleaned up the kitchen. Cookware, plates, utensils all put up. You’ve both settled down on the couch to watch whatever’s on, finding a movie you’ve both settled on. 

You’re snacking on some candy, a sour kind, ones with those sugar crystals. Unfortunately, a few of those crystals stick in the back of your throat, causing a coughing fit. You’re quick to get it under control, sipping on some water until it starts to die down. Leon leaned towards you, patting your back.  “Sorry, just got something in my throat,” You tell him, able to finally get the words out. Now that he knows you’re out of harm’s way, Leon’s concerned expression turns into a smirk. You raised an eyebrow at the change, a silent question. “Damn, baby…Would love to be in your throat.” Your jaw drops, cheeks turning redder than they did while you were catching your breath. “Excuse me?” You splutter, trying hard not to show that you did, in fact, find the joke funny. He throws his head back and guffaws, tears forming in his eyes. “Sorry honey, I couldn’t resist!” He gets out, before pulling you into a hug, kissing your scarlet cheeks. 

Another time, it’s when you two are bare in bed, his hands exploring every inch of your body. You’re on top, pussy rubbing against his cock, from base to tip. Your head is thrown back, enjoying the sensation until he suddenly grabs your hips and lets out a pained grunt. Snapping your head upright, you look at him with concern and ask, “Everything okay, darling?” “F-fuck. It’s…Everything’s alright, baby, keep moving for me.” You raise an eyebrow, but do as he says, continuing your movements. Falling back into the feeling, you begin to moan and grab your chest, while involuntarily clenching down on Leon’s cock. “Damn, baby!” He chokes out, grabbing your hips again, this time lifting you up from his lap. “Grippin’ my shit like Loctite!” You just stare at him for a breadth of time, wide eyed, before cackling with laughter. He soon joins in, both falling into a laughing fit.

You’re thankful for times like these during sex, being able to laugh whenever a mishap or something comical occurs. 

Another moment you can recall, you had received a package, a new sex toy. A vibrator you had been eyeing for some time, waiting for a sale to occur since it was quite pricey. Finally purchasing it, you were eager to get it out of its packaging and see it in person, excited for the time ahead where you would be using it. Pulling out and plugging the charger into the wall, setting the toy on your nightstand to charge. At this time Leon decides to enter the room, curious about the box, himself. Looking at your form bent over the nightstand, he comes up behind you, seeing you fiddle with the toy. “Ah, I see you finally got that cooter buzzer you’d been looking at.” “A what?!” You shrieked. Spinning around, mouth agape with face ablaze. “What? Don’t like the name I’ve given your toys?” He asks, smirking. “You are not calling them that!” You retort, jabbing a finger into his chest to emphasize. He grabs your wrist and pulls it up towards his face, kissing your knuckles. “Well…Can I call them whatever I want as long as I use them on you?” He questions, grinning now. “N-no! I mean…Maybe…” You stutter out, wondering how he can be so awkward and yet so seductive at the same time.

Now, the last thing that comes to your mind isn’t really something he said, but did. 

You had grabbed some dirty laundry out of the hamper, taking it to the laundry room to begin a load for washing. You toss the pile into the washing machine, going to check the bin in the bathroom for any more clothing. That’s when you noticed you had dropped a shirt in the hallway, the piece falling out of the rather large pile you held. Bending down to pick up the article, Leon walks into the hallway. “Heh, my turn,” he says, thinking about earlier that day when you had swatted him on his ass as he bent over to grab a pan from the cabinet. His hand pulls back, giving you a firm smack on the behind. You squeal, the momentum from his slap tipping you forward, causing you to lose balance and topple over. “Leon!” You screech, trying to find purchase albeit none around. Leon tries to catch you before you fall over completely, unfortunately, he isn’t fast enough.

“Oh shit, baby! I’m sorry!” He says as he’s pulling you up from the ground. “Are you hurt?” He asks, moving your hair from your face to search for any abrasions. Your eyes like daggers, you glare at him, gritting out, “No…But you’re about to be!” “Oh, fuck.” He mutters, before escaping and dashing off, you hot on his tail. A chase ensues, ending with him turning around and grabbing you. He picks you up and takes you to your shared room, you squealing over his shoulder. Tossing you onto the bed, tickling you until you’re both laughing and panting for breath. He sighs, leaning down to give you a kiss. “Love you, you little rascal,” he says. “Love you too, rapscallion.” You chortle, kissing him back.

There’s never a dull moment in your house.

[buttherainbowhasabeard]

The Boys: Why the Gruesomest Show on TV Is Also One of the Greatest

Brash. Brazen. Bonkers. Brutal. Bloody. Bawdy. Bizarre. On the surface, 'The Boys' is a show I should absolutely loathe, yet I love it. Why? Because it’s like nothing else I’ve ever seen before, and that makes it exhilarating! 

In this day and age of remakes, reboots, sequels, and prequels, 'The Boys' is a revelation. It takes everything we’ve come to know and love about the superhero genre and turns it on its head. Actually, it smashes its head in and flies off, covered in blood, with a big grin on its face. 

This alone is a great antidote to the "superhero fatigue” that so many of us have been suffering from. With the DC Universe currently in a Chapter 1 reset, and the Marvel Cinematic Universe in the midst of a very busy Phase 5, ditching the genre (and all the films, TV shows, and spin-offs you have to watch to keep up with it) has been beyond tempting.

In showrunner Eric Kripke's cleverly subverted script for 'The Boys' (based on a comic book series by Garth Ennis and Darick Robertson), each superhero, or "supe,” as they are dubbed in the show, is a satirical spin on a classic DC or Marvel character, even down to their collective name, The Seven (based on the Justice League).

However, unlike the more moral idols it takes its inspiration from, 'The Boys' is an R-rated romp that explores the ramifications of giving ordinary humans superhuman powers. Behind all the muscled supersuits and PR-manufactured wholesomeness, our heroes have become outright antagonists, and the so-called vigilantes have become our (anti)heroes.

Soldier Boy is an angry and arrogant take on Captain America. Homelander is a narcissistic, sadistic, and volatile version of Superman. Queen Maeve is Wonder Woman, if she were reduced to a cynical sidekick. All-American girl Starlight is an amalgamation of Mary Marvel, Stargirl, and Dazzler. Kimiko possesses a feral quality akin to that of Wolverine. Tek Knight is a BDSM-obsessed Batman. Black Noir is a masked mercenary in the same vein as Deadpool (minus the sass). The Deep is a dumb, perverted parody of Aquaman, and A-Train is a reckless Flash or Quicksilver. They even have their own Nick Fury of sorts, in the form of Vought International SEO Stan Edgar.

In the era of corruption, celebrities, and social influence, real-life supes would definitely abuse their powers and gaslight the public into believing every bit of righteous bullshit that came out of their mouths. They only (and begrudgingly) do good deeds to get more follows and likes, and most don’t like each other either, viewing teammates and partners as competitors rather than comrades.

This dark, disturbing, and at times hilarious take on the genre is what makes the show stand out amongst the rest. It easily offends, distresses, traumatises, titilates, and grosses you out. But it’s not just done for headlines and shock value. Every single chaotic, cruel, and unpredictable action is there for a reason. It forms part of a character’s motivations, it propels the plot forward, or it sets up a new and exciting direction.

Casting is another ingenious ingredient in the supe soup that is 'The Boys'. Household names (Antony Starr, Karl Urban, Giancarlo Esposito, Jensen Ackles, Simon Pegg, and Jeffrey Dean Morgan, to name a few) are mixed in with relatively new names (Erin Moriarty, Karen Fukuhara, Tomer Capone, Dominique McElligott, Aya Cash, and Colby Minifie). However, all performances are stellar. There isn’t one specific actor who carries the whole show or steals every scene (although Starr can be the most mesmerising). As an ensemble, they all have a role to play, and they play it scarily and consistently well.

Every episode is an intense mix of gratuitous violence, gore, sex, nudity, language, and drug use. Characters engage in orgies, bodies are mutilated and torn apart, heads are blown clean off, religious views are ridiculed, and political agendas are exploited. There are supes who are sexist, supes who are homophobic, supes who are racist, supes who are ableist, and supes cloaked in woke ideology purely for the purpose of infiltration and manipulation.

That being said, and for a show that always feels one scene away from being banned, 'The Boys' has shown incredible restraint when it comes to its ending. Five seasons was what was planned, and five seasons is what it’ll be. Despite top ratings for each season, a loyal fanbase, rich source material, and the potential to introduce dozens more supes and storylines, 'The Boys' can clearly see the value of quitting while it's ahead, and I salute them for it.

I’m confident that the fifth and final season will be f**king diabolical, and I can’t wait!

[franollie]

i finished batgirl (2000) and i loved it so muchhhh i cant even put it into words aaaaaahhhh

anyways do you have any more recs for Cass, Steph or Babs bc i need more (also any fic recs too?)

OKOK so I recommend this reading list for both steph and cass by @/jlquarterly. they also have a more condensed reading list for steph and cass individually as well as more extensive ones for them too. overall just a great account to follow if you need reading lists.

Some overall reads that I recommend:

Cass:

Batman (1940) #567

Detective Comics (1937) #734

(No Man's Land in general is a good read for cass but these are considered her first appearances)

DC First: Batgirl/Joker

Superboy (1994) #85 (i love this issue it is very dear to me)

Steph:

Detective Comics (1937) #647-649

Secret Origins 80 Page Giant

honestly all of Robin 1993 starting with issue #3

Robin (1993) #88 (Steph and Cass first meeting)

Batman: Huntress/Spoiler- Blunt Trauma (HELENA AND STEPH YIPPEEE)

Batgirl (2009)

Babs:

The Batman Chronicles #5 (Oracle: Year One)

All of Birds of Prey

General "batgirls" recs:

Convergence: Batgirl

Steph works in the medical field, the writers acknowledge her pregnancy, its about her relationship with the batgirl mantle, steph and cass live together and have a pet hamster together, it's literally perfect

Batgirls

This is where we play the "pick and choose from canon" game

Fics:

Let's Not Talk About It by Procrastinationfairy

T - 4k

Summary: cass explores how words fail to describe feelings, especially in terms of attraction.

MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH

God this fic....here to start. I'm obsessed with the way it tackles cass’s feelings for steph and the lack of language she would have for her emotions…insane...Her anger at tim for not “properly mourning” steph

If taken, I'm yours by evanescent

T - 8k

Summary: Sheer determination is not everything, though, and after exactly eight seconds Stephanie finds herself laying flat on her back after getting knocked down with a very real-feeling baseball bat. For a moment, she thinks the strange sound is her ears ringing, but then she sits up and finds Batgirl standing next to Batman, her shoulder shaking slightly. She’s laughing, Stephanie realizes. Batgirl must catch her staring because she makes a quick, swiping motion with her hand.

“I think,” Batman says, and Stephanie wonders if she has a concussion after all, because he kind of sounds amused, “she’s telling you to be faster.”

In a world when you have your soulmate's first words to you imprinted in their handwriting somewhere on your body, the fact Stephanie can't decipher hers seems like the least of her problems, most of the time.

A really sweet rewrite of Steph as batgirl

ALSO EMILY DICKINSONS POETRY PLAYS A REALLY BIG ROLE IN THIS <3333

heroes and thieves at my door (i can't seem to tell them apart anymore) by hinn_raven

T - 4k

Summary: Bruce really can’t help but think that Stephanie Brown, pre-medicine, piano player, and honors student, with Leslie vouching for her, would be a far better girlfriend for his daughter than Spoiler, the new vigilante in town.

This one has me kicking and giggling every time i read it

It's delightful and funny and just an overall good time

Now Stick It Thick by thebodydies

E - 1k

Summary: Cass’s body always did exactly what Cass wanted. And now Steph’s body did as well.

nobody look at me

Highly recommend checking out all of Hinn_Raven's works especially if you're a steph fan!

[dc-polls]

Biggest DC Misconception

Round 2 - Match 2

Cass only uses ASL

Cassandra Cain can speak now, and even when she couldn’t speak, she didn’t know sign language. My girl’s first language is body language, and while ASL can be literal at times, it’s not the same as reading body language. I’m talking about the mainline universe starting from no man’s land, going through batgirl 2000, and even leading up to the modern era I believe. It can be a fun head canon that she uses ASL, but the girl can speak, does speak, and enjoys speaking (as we approach the more modern era, she worked with clayface and they did Shakespeare together and she loved doing it). Her being able to communicate in verbal English was the basis for a major plot point in Batgirl 2000; some wacky power things happened, and she ended up (unwittingly) trading her natural ability to read body language for the ability to communicate in English. This is also the basis for the suicidal tendencies culminating in Shiva killing her. Again, the ASL is a fun head canon as an addition to her communication, but she’s fought so hard to learn to love communicating in verbal English, and it hurts when people take that away from her. Her learning to read, write, and speak is tied so deeply to her development, and you lose so much from her as a character when that’s taken out of the picture.

--

Cass Cain is butch/masc

People often say Cass Cain is butch/masc, and would only want to wear masculine clothing or even exclusively men's clothing. However, in most of her comics she wears feminine clothing, often even extremely fashion-oriented or girly clothing. One point here is that Cass loves ballet - a prototypically feminine sport - and being able to physically express herself in the language of dance is emotionally important to her. This isn't any kind of trade-off where she has to wear tutus to do her hobby; she doesn't express negative feelings about the costumes at all. It's also part of her character arc that she wasn't allowed to explore social relationships as a child, and the feminine clothing is a way of reclaiming the gendered interaction she was denied. Most importantly, though, it's very common in fandoms to degender east Asians and especially to masculinize Asian women unless their personality is extremely sexual/sensual. Insisting Cass should only have a male presentation and take on male roles is pretty racist!

[gorentaya]

✞༒︎✞ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ✞☓✞(:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ✞༒︎✞ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ✞☓✞

Patient Zero is a passion project and indie comic still in development that is yet to be released. The story representing the journey to recovery and healing of illness and trauma. Meant to disturb the comforted and comfort the disturbed. The story is based off the creators own life experiences and struggles with trauma, mental and physical health. Using metaphors and symbolism to tell the tale of their life.

⚠️STORY TRIGGER/CONTENT WARNINGS⚠️

Every chapter of the comic will have their own individual trigger/content warning for everything that will be included in said chapter. I want everyone who finds said material triggering to prepare themselves if they wish to proceed. If you do not care about triggering material and find the warnings to be a “spoiler” then you may skip it as you please. The warnings are for those who need them.

All of the subjects and themes included will be treated with nothing but love and care. The story explores the cause of trauma, the effects it has on a person and the work that goes into healing. The characters help each other understand their situation and find ways to cope together. My intent is to give comfort and validation to those who have gone through these hardships. To make characters that can help people understand themselves better and make them feel less alone in their struggles. But that’s why I’m so specific with including trigger warnings. The last thing I want is to harm anyone. So please, take care of yourself♡

You are not alone. You deserve to heal. You deserve to live. You are enough. And you are worthy feeling happy and fulfilled in life

Onto the general trigger warnings… Patient Zero includes triggering themes and depictions of-

Mental illnesses. Trauma. Disabilities. Eating disorders. Fat shaming. Self harm. Nudity. Sex. Sex/Porn/Drug/Alcohol addiction. Masochism. Grooming (sexual and non-sexual) Mental/Physical/Sexual abuse. Discussions and implications of sexual assault/r@p3. Religious trauma and imaginary. Blood. Gore. Body horror. Death. Murder. Trypophobia. Scopophobia. Homophobia. Transphobia. Strong/explicit language.

IMPORTANT NOTES-

Not all nudity is used in a sexual context. Masc and femme nipples will be shown. There will be a few sex scenes. Sex will be explicit, however sex organs and penetration will NOT be illustrated.

Self harm will be discussed and scars will be shown, the ACT of self harm (blade against skin) will NOT be illuminated.

Sexual assault/r@p3pe will be discussed and implied but the ACT will NOT be illustrated

Slurs will be used a FEW times and are ONLY those I- the author- is allowed to use. The T-slur for trans people. The F-slur for queer people. The R-slur for the mentally handicapped.

Toyhouse link for more information https://toyhou.se/Gorentaya/characters/folder:4499676

✞༒︎✞ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ✞☓✞(:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ✞༒︎✞ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ✞☓✞

~ Main Cast ~

Yamimiki Mimi - Protagonist

Gorentaya - Deuteragonist

Morrigan - Tritagonist

Bugs - Tritagonist

Angel - Antagonist

[tranakin-skywalker]

Story Masterlist

Figured I should finally make one of these so y'all know what the fuck I'm talking about when I go on about my silly little au ideas. I'll be updating this list as I publish things/ come up with new ideas. Published fics have a hyperling to their ao3 embedded in their title.

THE BIG BOYS

Singularity:

Half canon re-write, half me going "hey wouldn't it be fucked up if _?" Basically I packed all my favorite little headcanons and tropes into one five-part monster of a series, featuring things like eldritch demigod Anakin, Force deities, fucked up Naboo politics, sentient droids, and a Galactic Civil War that actually feels Galactic and like a war. Somehow ended up with me both trying to make Star Wars more realistic, and leans way more into the mythological side of the story. Also features a ton of my own original concepts. A pantheon of Tatooine gods and slave culture inspired loosely by Fialleril, Sith religion and rituals, clone culture and language built around the idea that they've been dehumanized and un-personed for their entire existence, and a bunch of stuff about the Coruscant underworld. You can find more about it under my fic:singularity tag

Star-Birth:

The first part of Singularity more or less covering the events of TPM with a few... creative liberties taken. Status: Published/ Ongoing Word Count: 92,740

Accretion:

Part II of Singularity covering the years of Anakin's apprenticeship between TPM and AOTC, as well as looks into both the lives of Shmi and Padme. I took inspiration from a bunch of the stories in Legends covering this time period but most of it is my own thing. This is the one that goes the deepest into the functions and every day life of the Jedi, as well as life on Coruscant in general. An exploration of the disconnect between the governing body of the Senate and the wider galaxy, the wealth disparity on Coruscant and just how fucking dystopian it is, and generally how something like the Clone Wars could come about. Status: Unpublished

Asterism:

Part III of Singularity. AOTC if I butchered it's body and reassembled it in the imagine of my own design. Some of the movie's plot points remain but I'm attempting to get from Point A to Point B as originally as I can while still keeping with the heart of Attack of the Clones. Status: Unpublished

Nucleosynthesis:

Part IV of Singularity. The Clone Wars but not the animated version. We are going full Republic comics version baby. Ahsoka is still here tho, because I love her. Basically my idea of what a galactic civil war would actually look like, featuring space battles that last for months on end, widespread disease outbreaks, planets completely wiped out of existence, billions of combatants, and war crimes galore. The size of this war is immense. Like, there's over 1 billion active duty clones at any given time. (Which actually isn't even all that much compared to the population of the Republic at large lol) Probably the most space opera of the series. Status: Unpublished

Event Horizon:

Fifth and final part of Singularity. Essentially it's version of RotS, but with a vastly different ending. And beginning. And middle. Basically it's RotS if you squint. This I think is going to be the one that goes the deepest into the mythological/ fantasy aspects of the story. The Force and all it's weirdness is a huge aspect of this one. This is also the fic that goes the deepest into the Sith and all their awfulness. It features a much beloved headcanon of mine that when a Sith master is killed by their apprentice, part of their consciousness enters into their apprentice as a sort of living holocron. Which means that the current Sith master is essentially possessed by all the Sith that came before them and is constantly having to fight to keep control of their own body. It serves both as a way to pass on all the Sith teachings (since a living master would have a vested interest in keeping knowledge from their apprentice and thus a lot of that knowledge would be lost over time) and as an attempt at immortality. A strong enough spirit can take control of a weak enough vessel. Unfortunately for all those Sith masters, any apprentice who is able to go on and kill their own master isn't going to be in any way weak. A full, proper possession in the Sith lineage has been few and far between. I imagine y'all can guess what this means for Sidious' intentions with Anakin, a living vergence of the Force and for all intents and purposes immortal (even if Anakin won't let himself acknowledge that fact). Status: Unpublished

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Cytokinesis:

What started as me asking myself "what if the start of ANH but Vader/Anakin was trans and the twin's gestating parent and thus, recognized Leia immediately?" which then turned into something much much longer than I intended. Oops. The actual story starts during the Clone Wars when Anakin discovers he's been magically impregnated by the Force just like how his own mother was. Deals a lot with gender, parenthood, generational trauma, and repeating cycles. Also clones. Lots and lots with the clones. Their relationship with Anakin after discovering that he's basically a clone of his mother is a huge part of this fic. This particular version is going to follow along the beats of RotS and what comes after more or less (so, things are going to get a lot worse before they get better. Sorry) with some divergence here and there. This is the fic I find myself going back and rewriting/tweaking the most. Which is partially why it's taking me so long to update. I'm trying to make this next chapter one I'm completely happy with instead of having to go back and redo it in a few weeks lol. (Tho I think that's part of the fun of fanfic, the ability to go back and change things whenever you want). Honestly, this one is getting so long I might end up having to split it into two fics. fic: cytokinesis tag Status: Published/ Ongoing

Unnamed Cytokinesis Spin-off:

While Cyto is going to have a happy ending, it's going to take a lot of hurt to get there. Which is why I came up with an au to my au where the twins come early, Anakin doesn't fall, and things are happy... ish. The Republic is still a trash fire on the brink of collapse and everyone still has so so much trauma. Even when I write a happy au, things still suck lmao. I just can't imagine a RotS fix-it where things aren't still falling apart and Anakin gets off scot-free for murdering the president of the galaxy. Status: Unpublished

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Groundwater:

Ah yes, the fic that is really three differnt aus in a trench coat. 1. In the midst of galactic instability and the seceding of dozens of planets from the Republic, a revolt begins to spread in the Outer Rim. A revolt led by unknown masked force users, and a suspected Sith known only as Vader. The Jedi scramble to uncover the identity of these new enemies, only to discover a plethora of unpleasant truths that make them begin to question themselves and the very Republic instead. 2. After five years with the Jedi Anakin starts to have nightmares about his mother dying and they. just. won't. stop. He asks Obi-Wan for help, begs him for the chance to go to Tatooine and make sure she's alright. He isn't allowed to go. So he takes matters into his own hands. He leaves in the middle of the night, nothing but a note and a cut padawan braid left behind, and he goes to save his mother. Anakin ends up finding more than just his mother. There's a freedom network, one that Shmi is part of. There is a rebellion brewing, stolen weapons and stolen ships. There is a city in the desert, a paradise made by the hands of escaped slaves. And there are things, old things, powerful things, that he never new existed on Tatooine. Like deep ancient caves carved by the planet's mythical groundwater where kyber crystals grow wild and undiscovered. 3. Darth Vader lived, and then he died. In his son's arms he died, but that wasn't the end of it. There is no death, there is only the Force. And the Force was not done with him yet. He returns, four decades in the past, as a ghost haunting his younger self. Forced into the role of a passive observer, no power, no voice, seen only by one little boy and unable to change anything. Cursed to watch history repeat itself. Or at least that's what he thought. fic: groundwater tag Status: Unpublished

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I Wonder Which One Has My Eyes:

There was something achingly familiar about the pair of droids following the young princess around, Pooja thought. Or Pooja Naberrie, junior senator of Naboo, is invited to a senatorial event on Alderaan. There she meets and befriends young Princess Leia Organa. A few things click into place. This one is actually inspired by @keistance fic Uncle Ani, where the Naberries knew about the Anidala marriage. I thought it would be so so fun if Pooja realized that Leia was her baby cousin and secretly tells Leia all about her birth parents. Which means she goes into ANH knowing all about Padme Amidala and Anakin Skywalker, something that completely derails a certain interrogation with a certain Dark Lord when he stumbles over that particular fact. I'm fascinated by the idea of Leia coming from a similar place as Luke in canon, where she knows her father as a good man named Anakin Skywalker before she ever knew him as Vader. I think that change in perspective would give her the same belief and drive to bring her father back to the Light that Luke has. Also I think both twins ganging up on Vader to bully him into redemption is very funny. Status: Unpublished

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Unnamed Togruta AU:

Or Togruta!Skywalkers. Shmi and Anakin are Tatooine togruta, a rare population of togs that were ensalved from Shili dozens of generations ago and slowly grew to adapt to the desert environment. A characteristic of the Tatooine togs is the forward facing montals, which Anakin has. It's a trait coveted for gladiator slaves since they can be used to pin down/gore opponents. Anakin was occasionally entered into matches as a child where he was forced to fight and kill animals. Had he not been taken by the Jedi, he would have eventually been put in death matches against other sentients. (because I'm lazy I'm just copy/pasting this part from an old ask)

A lot of the ideas are coming from the hyena discord, so I can’t claim them as my own. But they are just too good to pass up. Like togruta making infrasound with their montrals and constantly projecting their moods. So when Anakin first gets to the Temple he’s constantly screaming for him mom at a pitch that only other togruta can hear. I’ve decided that that’s actually how he first meets Ahsoka. She hears him making his lost, scared, where’s mom, where’s family sounds and seeks him out to comfort him. Ahsoka would be about four here, and would have left Shili recently enough that she could still remember what those noises mean, even if Tatooine togruta sound different from Shili togruta. (to a Shili tog Anakin’s distressed noises sound like he’s being maimed, but that’s just because of the generational trauma and general awfulness of being a togruta on Tatooine. What they would think of the vocalizations he makes when actually being maimed we will not think about)

So Anakin and Ahsoka end up growing up together right from the start, and the main reason Anakin is so insistent on being knighted early is so that Ahsoka can be his padawan. It’s a private thought he has to himself at first, but as Ahsoka gets older and no masters are showing any interest in taking her on she starts to panic. Anakin tells her that he’ll just have to get knighted before she ages out so that he can be her master. And then the Clone War starts and he realizes that keeping his promise means bringing her onto the battlefield with him where she could die and he’s not sure if he’ll be enough to keep her alive :) Because Shmi is a togruta too she does not get bought by Cleigg Lars. I am just. not dealing with the implications of that. (Listen. I want to read Shmi’s marriage to him as a good thing, but I have a very hard time doing that.) Now, there’s actually a comic (Legands, I think, not Disney canon) where Gardulla goes to Watto and tries to buy Anakin back after he wins the Boonta Eve Classic. So have some fun thoughts about what would have happened to Anakin if he hadn’t gone with Qui-Gon. In the fic, Gardulla goes to buy Anakin but of course he left with the Jedi, so Gardulla decides she’ll take Shmi as payment for Watto’s debts. After all, if Shmi already had one child who turned out to be a talented podracer, well, she might have more. Hence the younger sibling that comes about shortly after Anakin leaves.

When Anakin goes back to Tatooine because of the nightmares about his mom he finds out that Watto sold his mom back to Gardulla and has to go to her to buy his mom’s freedom. Which would be traumatic, on multiple levels. Anakin finds out that a month before he arrived, Shmi tried to escape with the sister Anakin didn’t know he had, and Gardulla had their chips detonated. Gardulla even gives him their triggered remotes as proof. (Of course unbeknownst to Anakin, Shmi and the sister survived and are living with a village of other escaped togruta.) A lot of canon still happens the same, including Anakin’s fall, Order 66, Mustafar, etc. But when Bail Organa sees Ahsoka at Padme’s funeral he tells her that he can take her to a mutual friend of theirs. Ahsoka thinks (hopes) it’s Anakin at first, and is devastated when she realizes it’s Obi-Wan (and then hates herself for feeling disappointment because she should be happy that Obi-Wan is still alive, but he’s not Anakin, and this means that Anakin must be dead). There’s no Lars family and the Organas would have a harder time explaining a non-human daughter, so Ahsoka and Obi-Wan end up taking care of the twins. They eventually find their way to Tatooine because it’s out of the Empire’s notice and, well, because it’s a connection to Anakin (Ahsoka’s trying to hold onto anything she can that connects her to her brother and Obi-Wan is in his self-harming phase.)

And it’s there that they eventually run into a little community of togruta and a woman who looks suspiciously like Anakin who has the last name Skywalker. But hey, Shmi gets to meet her grandkids at least. Even if it happens at the same time that she finds out that son she thought she’d sent away to a better life and hasn’t seen in 13 years is dead. (Obi-Wan sees how much Anakin’s death destroys Shmi and decides to never, ever tell her what he became. Vader will be his burden and it’s a secret he will take to his grave. Anakin Vader is dead, and he’ll save them from ever finding out how it really happened) Of course, 15 years later Ahsoka goes to rescue some rebels from a walking death omen in black when she realizes the infrasound calls he’s shrieking out of his mangled montrals is devastatingly familiar.

togruta au tag or togrutakin tag Status: Unpublished

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Anachromism:

Anakin ends up twenty three years in the future, Vader ends up twenty three years in the past.

So you’ve got Anakin just fresh off the child murder suddenly flung into the Rebellion era and being faced with how much he supremely fucked up. Meanwhile Vader like not even a week after Bespin suddenly back in the Jedi Temple in the middle of the Purge. And because his vision is shit he doesn’t realize at first that it’s a bunch of clone troopers shooting at the big black angry mass that suddenly appeared. Which leads him to accidentally saving a bunch of baby Jedi, who of course imprint on him like orphaned ducklings. Vader figures he must had died at some point and this is a divine punishment for all the atrocities, trapped in a purgatory of reliving all his greatest mistakes. So in a bit of an uncharacteristic move for him, he doesn’t murder to death the gaggle of preschoolers he’s accidentally collected, and instead, in a series of absurd events sort of unintentionally helps to start the Rebel Alliance in a bit of cosmic irony.

Status: Unpublished

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War Machines (title pending):

Jedi are living weapons. Far into the Outer Rim, the Hutts obtain a planet killer. Dystopian au where the sith empire was never wiped out and controls half the galaxy and the Republic is more of an authoritarian dictatorship that uses teh Jedi as living weapons of mass destruction. Force sensitive children are taken from their families and trained as soldiers, raised with a cloned ‘handler’ who was designed specifically to be able to keep their Jedi in line. The Jedi are eldritch, incredibly powerful beings that are forced to wear suppression gear that keeps them confined to their physical form. Only the handler is able to turn it off the gear and allow the jedi the full use of their abilities. Some force sensitives are wired into ships or turned into actual weapons. On Tatooine, Gardulla realizes one of her slaves is a powerful force sensitive and begins having him trained like a jedi to be her own personal one man army. Status: Unpublished

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the thing that lives in dead stars (title pending):

A gambler Watto may have been, but stupid he was not. Anakin Skywalker was too great a prize to risk losing, not when the man betting had the gleam in his eye that told of a winning hand. Not that it mattered in the end. The boy won, and Watto lost, and the hutts got themselves the only human in the entire galaxy that could win a pod race. At least the outlander didn’t leave with the boy as well as his pretty Noobian ship. Or Anakin wins the race but not his freedom. Six years later, the circuit brings him to Coruscant, and the attention of a Sith Lord. My very fucked up Anakin raised as a Sith AU. Status: Unpublished

Shapeshifters AU:

aka space vampire Vader aka sun dragon Skywalkers. So I think we've established by this point that I can't get enough of Eldritch Skywalkers. They are my JAM. So of course I made another eldritch Skywalkers au. There's a few main points to this one. 1. Anakin, and subsequently Luke and Leia, being freaky part-Force abominations, can shapeshift. However, they cannot shapeshift into anything they like. This isn't FMA Envy/ Mystique/ whatever. They can't just look at a person and copy their face. Instead they have to have a deep emotional connection to what they are transforming into, and that transformation is always accessed by strong emotion. While they could theoretically shapeshift into a person they care very close to, the thought of doing so is very unnerving and almost violating, so they don't. Instead, all three Skywalkers have a habit of changing into creatures from Tatooine mythology. 2. Anakin and Beru are half siblings. I love this idea. I cannot express to you how much I love this idea. It just scratches something in my brain so well. Beru is Anakin's younger sister by about a year, and got left on Tatooine with their mother when Anakin was taken by Qui-Gon. She is not a part-Force abomination, but grew up knowing all about Anakin's weirdness. 3. Luke AND Leia are both given to Beru (and Owen) because of said knowledge about Anakin's weirdness. She is probably the best and safest option for raising two baby shapeshifting half-Force abominations. And thus the twins grow up on the same stories Anakin did, with the added knowledge that he could turn into those creatures, and thus, so do they. 4. At some point Anakin found out he could consume the midi-chlorians of other Force sensitives on account of the whole half-Force abomination thing. And since midi-chlorians exist in a persons blood, well. Space vampire. Sidious has a lot of fun feeding Force sensitive people to his pet monster. 5. Speaking of- Vader is more often than not a fuck off huge black hole of a sun dragon. Like, legitimately. In this, sun dragons are essentially living stars in the shape of massive serpents. Vader is what happens when one of those living suns becomes a black hole. 6. Vader is just all around fucked up honestly. He no longer gets to decide what form he takes. His body and everything about it is determined by Sidious' will. His master decides what he turns into, and Vader was always meant to be a monster on a leash. So of course that's what Sidious keeps him as. 7. The twins somehow get roped into the Rebellion. Don't ask me how, I haven't figured out that part just yet. Status: Unpublished

SHORT FICS & ONE-SHOTS

For a Son:

He could not bring her son back to her. Could not even return his body to lay to rest. The least he could do was bring her the grandchild she never even knew she had. He knew it could never forgive what he had taken. Obi-Wan finds out what happened to Shmi Skywalker. Word Count: 4,018 Status: Published

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Lessons the Desert Gave:

No one ever understood how the sand would sink into open wounds. How, no matter how much you scrubbed and washed and clawed, the sand always found its way into your blood. The desert has a way of sticking with you, even long after you left it. (Turns out growing up a slave can really fuck a guy up.) Ficlet/ one-shot collect of character studies looking at all the ways Anakin's childhood would have really messed him up. I'm open to prompts/ requests for this one. Word Count: 1,820 Status: Published / Ongoing

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Dead Letters:

Post RotS. Obi-Wan gets drunk and messages Anakin on his old comm from the war, forgetting that Anakin is dead. For some reason, he keeps on doing it. What could it hurt? Anakin is dead, his comm destroyed on Mustafar just like his body. So he keeps sending messages, because for just a second, it means he can pretend that Anakin is still alive out there somewhere. Then he discovers he doesn't have to pretend. This one could so easily be a crack-fic. Darth Vader gets drunk texts from Obi-Wan telling him all about how awful Tatooine is and that he'll never make fun of Anakin again for hating sand and he keeps getting sunburnt and also Anakin's son is so sweet and cute and just like him until he turned into a surly teenager, why couldn't he just stay an adorable little boy forever? Status: Unpublished

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Jewel Box:

Sidious’ obsession ran deep. What he wanted, he would have- wholly, utterly, and completely. His want for the boy was no different. Sidious POV of Anakin through the years featuring all the horrible messed up things he thinks and does. Big BIG warning for child abuse, grooming, and rape/non-con in addition to Sidious' all around awfulness. This is probably the most awful thing I've ever written. Like holy shit it's fucked up. It's taking me ages to finish because I keep having to take breaks from it. And I'm not even going into any graphic detail. Title comes from that one line in the RotS novel where Sidious calls Vader's suit a jewel box. Status: Unpublished

[moritzakgae]

okay. moritz gender time. this will be long. i wish the headless queen was included in the musical!!!!! because i think there is a really clear and evident queer subtext surrounding moritz in the play and earlier drafts of the script that is less explored in the show. like. in the show, moritz’s relationship with his gender is mostly understood through the scene before touch me (“What it feels like? … for the woman?...”) and the scene with ilse where he proclaims his will to tell the angels that he lived as ilse (“I’ll tell them all, the angels, I got drunk in the snow,”). an earlier draft even included, “You. Ilse. I’d have been you.”

In wedekind’s play, we know that moritz feels the same as melchior in terms of how boys and girls should be treated (“in the hot summers I’d dress them all in short white cotton tunics with a leather belt, boys and girls. I think if they grew up like that, they’d be less uptight than we are.”) compared to show-moritz, probably because he is written as a comic character, there is not really any sign that he thinks for himself, or has any kind of intellectual thought at all. but he does! he has thoughts on the gendered structure of society! pleas guys, he thinks!

back to the headless queen because i got distracted. i posted this before but the paragraph from the introduction of the play, but i wanna talk about it more.

the separation of the head from the body. the expectation that women in society should only be a vessel, not a mind. symbolic decapitations. martha, wendla, mrs. gabor, the headless queen. “Whenever I see a pretty girl I imagine her without a head. Then all of a sudden I feel as though I’m a headless queen, and someone will put another head on me.” the headless queen who couldn’t see or laugh or kiss. who couldn’t communicate outside of body language. like it is so incredibly clear he sees himself as the headless queen. his inability to sit still in his own skin. moving like staying still for too long will allow people to see. that is why it is haunting him. even his own personal decapitation renders him closer to becoming her.

almost done being crazy but it is really interesting that his crisis of his adolescents is presented so differently from everyone else. like ernst and hanschen, while their love would be seen as a sin by the society they exist in, they understand their love. whether they understand it as innocent or as a sin, it is something tangible and knowable. to moritz, it’s not his love that is a sin. it is a sense that there is something just. fundamentally wrong. with him.

there’s more that i wanna say but i fear that i am getting too crazy already. if you read this far, you are my friend now.

[mermaidmoose]

Inspired by @montyuh & @callsign-relic first contact AU oneshots - here’s the first fanfic I’ve written in literal years so uh, it’s a bit rough.

Soaring through the depths of space, far beyond the reach of man traveled a ginormous starship- the Lost Light. Measuring 15 miles long and 10 miles wide it was certainly spacious enough to comfortably accommodate a large crew … and one tiny new resident.

Back on Earth, you had signed up to be part of an expedition to an inhabitable planet far from home. In exchange for food, shelter, and the adventure of a lifetime you eagerly packed your bags and said your goodbyes to loved ones. The trip was supposed to take a few years total give or take. Nothing too strenuous.

To quote Murphy’s Law: “What can go wrong will go wrong”. The company responsible for creating the expedition’s starship had cut corners- lots of them. When the starship jumped into warp drive it shook so violently that your whole body was rattled and smashed into the ceiling of your capsule bed. You were lucky to get away with only severe bruising and a bloody tongue. Exiting the jump left the ship stranded, drifting aimlessly as everyone scrambled in the dark to collect themselves. With several of your more experienced crew-mates dead or injured, you and the few survivors chose to route the ship’s remaining power to fuel the escape pods to try to navigate back to Earth.

After a week of travel (according to your pod’s calendar) you were carefully navigating through an asteroid field when a large shadow fell over you. While you are grateful the giant-ass starship that appeared out of nowhere hadn’t obliterated you and your escape pod, you weren’t expecting to be kidnapped either. By giant alien robots no less! With a language barrier! And no sense of personal space or boundaries! Shit! You didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at the situation.

Well, you had tried quietly crying about it while wandering down one of the vast halls of the Lost Light, until a blue mechanical horror emerged from an adjacent hallway. To you, Whirl looked like something that had stepped out of a horror movie, with his gangly inhuman build, long neck, and large yellow optic that felt like it drilled right through you.

Whirl barely gives the fleshy creature a cursory glance, noting that it had stopped moving and making those weird noises. He hardly knew what all the fuss was about over such a small, fragile, stinky creature. One misstep and he’d be cleaning gunk out of his foot for several cycles. As he looked away and began ruminating on who he could heckle at Swerve’s a sound made his antennae twitch. It was the pitter-patter of tiny feet running away from him at a frantic yet pathetically slow speed.

Ok, so maybe he could gain some entertainment out of the thing at least. “Hey? Where you goin?” He drawls as he slowly follows after you. It was almost comical how slow he had to walk to not catch up right away. Did you really think those tiny legs could outrun him? “If you don’t pick up the pace I’ll pinch ya!” He leans forward and clacks his pincers menacingly at the empty air behind you.

You were scared shitless. Once Whirl started plodding after you, you contemplated if this was the end. Murdered or eaten by a metal alien monster and all because you wanted to explore beyond earth. ‘I wish I could go back in time and throttle myself’ you seethe as another pinch draws closer. ‘I wish I had never left home. I wish-‘ pre-death regret-thinking is cut to a halt by the appearance of a gap in the wall paneling. In an instant, all thoughts disappear as your body bursts forward with a surge of adrenaline. With a quickness neither of you were expecting, you squeeze yourself into the gap.

You heave a sigh of relief at your successful escape. Your victory is short lived however when Whirl’s optic comes into view and blasts you with what feels like the light of several hundred light bulbs. “Ow! Bastard!” you snarl. Without even thinking you blindly lash out and slap the offending optic. Whirl jerks back in slight surprise, not expecting to feel … whatever that was. Was that an attempt to fight back? Damn, this thing was pathetic. “Oh? Think you’re a tough guy? You’ll need to hit harder than that!” He jams one of his pincers into the gap above your head, trying to wiggle the wall panel open.

As Whirl is focused on the wall panel, you desperately squint around, looking for some means of escape. Thankfully, his loosening of the panel opened another gap on the opposite end. You make a break for it and rush out of the gap, not daring to look back. As you feel a rush of wind and the thrumming of danger (or is that the vibrations of something running?) a shout breaks through the chaos.

“Whirl! What do you think you’re doing!?” Before you can even register what’s happening a smaller, orange mech runs up and scoops you into his hands, holding you in a protective grasp. Though muffled you can still hear what you’re pretty sure is angry robot speak.

Rung rolls his optics at Whirl’s theatrics and sighs. “We’ll discuss this further at your next session. And don’t think this will go unreported- Ah, poor thing, you’re shaking” his attention is drawn back to you. The mech softly coos, gently running a finger along your back in soothing strokes. Truthfully at this point you’re shaking from a mix of adrenaline and relief, not fear. But you lean into Rung’s finger and note how much gentler he is compared to the other bots you’ve met so far. Orange eyebrows bot is now #1 in your book … whatever that means (god your brain is fried. you want a damn nap).

“Are you trying to kill the poor thing? Organics are much more fragile than us Whirl, even enough stress can kill them. Such as being chased by a giant mech! And don’t think I didn’t see you try to grab them!” Rung hardly raises his voice at others, but if Whirl is going to be a threat to the organic, he needs to intervene now.

“Tch! Relax eyebrows, we were just playing around. Y’know, bonding and all that slag. That’s what the captain said we were supposed to do right? Well,” He clicks his pincers. “This is how I bond. Bet we’re already besties! See?” Whirl stretches his neck out to get a closer look at you, but all you do is cower further into the orange mech.

Whirl lets out a dramatic gasp and places one servo over where his spark would be. “Did you see that doc? Rejected! Betrayed! I’m never gonna emotionally recover from this!”

“…It wasn’t that bad” the blue mech grumbles, somewhat affronted by Rung’s scolding and the weird itching at the back of his processor. “Whatever, I’ve got better things to do than hang with you two losers. Like getting drunk!” With that, the blue mech takes off with a cackle, leaving you and Rung in the dust to process everything.

‘I need to find my escape-pod as soon as possible, or else I’m gonna die here’ you morosely conclude.

[elitadream]

I love the comic you recently did. It was so whole to see Luigi and Jr interact. Seeing Luigi being so distraught and needing to find Mario hurts my heart.

I can only imagine Luigi’s reaction would be seeing Mario in Bowser’s body. I feel like he would be hesitant, maybe even a little fearful. But then Mario would probably kneel down and either cup his face or press their forward together very gently and the fear would melt away i feel like Luigi would hug Mario after that.

I don’t know I feel like they are they type of brothers where their love language is physical affection, hugs are normal to them. Even with Mario’s consciousness in Bowser’s body I feel they would still be that way.

I don’t know if that’s how your thinking about making their interactions but that’s the vibe I get cuz I love me some wholesome brotherly affection.

Thank you! 😊 I'm glad you enjoyed it! ✨️

What I find most interesting to explore with this concept in particular is how the situation affects each of these characters individually. In a scenario like this one, nobody is spared and they all suffer in their own way. 😥

But there's also a very strong feeling of love and solidarity that can be felt through these trials, and that's where the beauty lies. The outpouring affection and support resulting from that pain gives warmth to the gloom and sentiment of despair that would otherwise be overwhelming, and that's something I can't get enough of in stories.

As for the bros, you can be sure that these events wouldn't deter them. If anything, I'm certain that it would only make their bond even stronger in the end. 🙏💗

[wickershells]

Something very interesting to me when watching the walking dead is its by-large refusal to meaningfully engage with sexual abuse as a topic… I’ve never read the comics, don’t really plan to, but from what I’ve heard there were several instances of rape depicted there, but very little to go on in the show — Carol reveals when praying that her husband sexually abused (or at least wanted to abuse) their young daughter (presumably + contextually her as well), something that to my memory is never referenced again; the Governor forces Maggie to strip herself half-naked and bend over, but “doesn’t actually do anything” (forceful stripping is, indeed, a form of sexual abuse) compared to his apparently brutal (?) rape of Michonne in the comics; Lydia is repeatedly raped by members of the Whisperers in the comics, encouraged by her mother, an aspect removed entirely from the show; Negan, of course, comes closest — his ‘wives’ are quite literally coerced into sexual relationships with him — and yet the show seems reluctant to address even him as an abuser.

Negan’s redemption is written only for him as a killer, a tyrant, and not as a rapist — it would have to address very difficult questions about power, patriarchy, the prominence of violence against women both historically and whenever worlds fall apart, and the ways in which any of these can be tackled meaningfully, what a society that actively prevents rape might look like. We know statistically that punitive justice does incredibly little to actually prevent it, and yet this is exactly what happens to Negan, and in the show his language when exacting power is, as always, very sexual — sexual language to humiliate, to express dominance, success, influence over a victim. One of my favourite lines of his is often seen as comedic: “I just slid my dick down your throat, and you thanked me for it”. Highlights just how Negan thinks of violence, and why his rules supposedly against rape are so sanctimonious, so two-faced.

It matters that his weapon of choice is phallic, that he named it after his wife, that he personifies it to such an extent he feels like he has lost some part of himself when it is gone; like a castration, like he’s a eunuch, only a half-man, nothing left for him to swing or thrust or penetrate with. But then none of this is addressed in any substantial way, and all we get are people telling us that he has changed, because now he doesn’t murder anyone (in this specific team), and he is gentler and kinder and starved himself in his suicidality, and doesn’t he have a soft spot for children? None of this is relevant to patterns of rapist thinking and behaviour, to rehabilitative methods. But it isn’t a topic worth exploring, and if it was, it is probably too dark for this show where there is no shortage of rotting bodies tearing apart the living, and skulls being cracked open while loved ones scream and cry and wail, and violence and its repercussions are at the heart of every action — so long as that violence has nothing to do with the existence, and subsequent examination, of misogyny