#i like the last one but it's so many syllables lol
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bookishjules · 6 months ago
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What are your thoughts on the Kel x Antonetta ship in sword catcher? 😊❤️
oh babe so many. from the moment kel sat down next to her at that first dinner, i've been soso intrigued by them. i think that's the difference between them and conlin tbh like i've been projecting the trajectory of that relationship since the beginning, but while i def nosedived straight into shipping kel with antonetta in the fucking prologue, they've really kept me guessing! there were times when i kinda drew back from their ship, but that was erased every time they were in a room together. bc kel is obsessed and so am i.
they are both just SUCH intriguing characters with their secrets and their masks and it's exactly what makes them perfect for each other imo. each sees through the other's exterior, but not far enough to know anything close to the truth and that's just so dsahflkj like i'm desperate for them to know things about the other that no one else does and for that to tie them together in some way that leads to romance (bc i feel like that's the only order in which that will be able to happen given the circumstances)
oh and don't even get me started on that grass ring??? i died. i died. i am a little worried that.. well given the theory that ana is actually prosper beck.. that she only had kel steal the locket so that he would find that and that would allow her to manipulate him in some way.. but that doesn't mean the love can't also be there hehe
i just can't get over the way kel kisses people as a distraction and a way to focus. and like not always in a good way. like what did merren say after he kissed him? about using him. but the conscious effort it takes kel to hold himself back from ana.. the way he'll kiss anyone but her.. i just.. o<-<
anyway i love them and their dynamic. also antonetta is an icon and i need to know simply everything about her, which means i need kel to do the finding out <3
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sapphicvqmpires · 3 months ago
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❁ཻུ۪۪♡ who are we?
vampire series | shuri udaku | part 2
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Pairing - vampire!shuri x black fem!reader
Word Count - 19.4k (listen…either grab your popcorn or keep scrolling lol)
Contains - smut (18+), fingering, cunnilingus, clit play, overstimulation, choking/breathplay, biting, edging, strap-on sex, blood drinking, descriptions of blood, homophobia, angst, fluff, Shuri being a hot vampire asshole
Divider From - @firefly-graphics
Sneak Peak - As the words fell from your lips, a wave of warmth surged through Shuri’s undead heart and she swears she felt it beat for a second. Each word and syllable echoed through her vampire mind, a mind that knew loneliness and despair like no other but in came you, the light at the end of the tunnel and she swears she could die from how much she loved you. "Turn me," you repeated one last time, your voice carrying a soft insistence rather than a question. You caught a fleeting change in the color of Shuri's eyes, though she quickly masked it but you definitely noticed the subtle shift.
Tags - @inmyheadimobsessed @amplifiedmoan @vampzxi @heejayy @shurislover @shurismainbxtch @shuriszn @naomis-daydream @prettymrswright @pocketsizedpanther @gardenof-venus @tiii-iiiiii @ihearttish @playhousedistee @somethingcleaverandwhitty @niyahwrites @tishsrealwife @oceean @sookiesookie @cafehyunji @ventingfanfics @marsology @desswright29 @sweetalittleselfish-honey @kisskourt @dayedreamm @mcqueeferson @dejaonline (comment if you want to be tagged in future fics, 18+ only)
Writers Note: I’m so so sorry, this took so long, but I wanted it to be perfect and I had so many periods of being unmotivated, I didn’t want to force myself to write when I wasn’t feeling it. But thank you so so much to everyone that stuck around and was patient with me, I’m sure all the sneak peeks and shit were frustrating but we’re here! Grab your popcorn and enjoy my loves :) ❁ཻུ۪۪♡
Part 1 - who are you?
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November 23rd, 2411, New York (continued…)
❁ཻུ۪۪♡ You were at a genuine loss for words, and it appeared she felt the same way. It had been quite a while since the last time you spoke with her, and even for a vampire, it truly felt like a long time ago. You broke the silence with the first thing that came to mind; the simplest way to ease back into the dialogue and it was a question you truly wanted to know the answer to.
“How…how have you been? Where have you been?” Your voice shook with the vibrations of sheer astonishment, still attempting to comprehend the sight of her gracefully seated before you.
"I've been... well. You know, just wandering the world, experiencing new things. Nothing out of the ordinary I suppose," she responded, and you couldn't ignore the subtle reduction in her once thick accent. It wasn't a dramatic change, probably not noticeable to human ears, but your keen senses detected it. How could you ever forget the voice that once made your own heartbeat falter?
“Your voice…”
She raised an eyebrow. “What about my voice?”
“You sound…different. Your accent…it isn’t as thick as it used to be.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
“No, I just…it just caught me off guard is all.”
"Hmmm," she hummed curiously. "But your voice hasn't changed. You still got that annoying whiny voice," she teased with a smirk, and it was the most familiar you had felt with her so far. That confident grin paired with the sarcastic comment, your undead heart could almost swell at how it made your body react. It reminded you of just how much you truly missed her. You playfully flicked her on the shoulder, and it sparked laughter from both of you. Oh, how you missed her laugh. You missed the way her adorable face would scrunch up, and her perfectly aligned teeth would come into view. It made your stomach flutter, reminiscent of the days when you were human, and you couldn't help but get lost in that familiar feeling that you had almost forgotten.
“Well I’m glad not all of you has changed. You’re still a dumbass,” you reply half-jokingly, making you both laugh once more. Once the laughter subsides, you find yourself aching to know more about her and what she’s been up to.
“So…you’re back in New York, I see,” you comment.
“I could say the same about you, s’thandwa.”
“Yeah well…you know…what better place for a vampire than the city that never sleeps, right?”
Briefly, Shuri falls into silence but you can see it in her eyes, the way they glisten that she feels a moment of intimacy.
“You remember that?”
“Of course I remember that, Shuri. I remember a lot.”
Shuri graces you with a crooked smile, highlighting the glossy sheen that coats the irises of her dark eyes. For an instant, a comforting warmth embraces you, as if this is precisely where you were meant to be at this exact point in time.
“And what about you, y/n? How have you been?”
You stop, your body tensing as you contemplate the myriad of responses you could provide. In all honesty, the years without her have been a collision of tides, a shifting wavelength of emotions and experiences that have caused you to both love and resent Shuri. There are moments when you despise her, yet miss her with every fiber of your being. As she poses the question, a fleeting hint of anger threatens to surface, but you inhale the breath you don't need before proceeding to answer.
“I’ve been…everything, I guess? I’ve felt everything, learned everything, and now I’m just lonely. I’ve been so full and empty at the same time…I don’t know, Shuri. It’s just been—”
But Shuri interrupts with the gentle stroke of her thumb on your cheek. Her tender caress seems to fill the void that has haunted you for nearly two centuries. You can't help but feel a pathetic sense of vulnerability as her small touch impacts you, but you permit yourself to experience it fully. You embrace the warmth she imparts with that simple gesture because, in this world of loneliness, few things compare to the solitude of a vampire. You needed this.
“I know, angel. I know. Open up to me. I’m here.” Her voice drew you in like a siren's song like it did so many years ago, guiding you to the profound depths of your emotions as you shed the first tear you had in years. She gently wiped it away with the pad of her thumb before enveloping you in the warmth of her hold, and you surrendered to her care.
“I’m here, y/n. I’m here.”
April 20th, 2022, New York
It had been approximately two months since Shuri unveiled her true nature, two months since you both professed your love, and two months since you posed the unanswered question that you still desperately held in your heart. You were reluctant to press her on the matter, yet it gnawed at you that she hadn't responded. Of course there would be good reasons as to why she never answered you, but what could that reason be?
You were together, entwined in your bed sheets as the moon light shone through your window, passionately embracing her as she kissed you. The depth of your love for her and her reciprocal feelings made you wish for this moment to quite literally be everlasting. The sensation of having her in your arms was something you could never tire of, so you reveled in what she was offering at that very moment.
“You’ve been kissing me for a long time now,” you say with a smile, lying beneath her as her smile mirrors yours. She plants another kiss on your nose before resting her head on your chest, nestling her soft curls into your skin.
“I just love you,” she replies, and she chuckles under her breath at how your heart skips a beat.
“That’s not fair, Shuri.”
“What’s not fair?”
“You laughing at the way my heart reacts to you…I know you got your incredible senses or whatever but you need to quit making fun of me.”
With a quick and fluid vampiric motion, Shuri changes positions, now leaning against the headboard while you straddle her. It almost takes your breath away, even though you should be accustomed to her rapid movements by now.
“Shuriiii, fuck,” you say, trying to keep calm the dizziness.
“Shutup,” she comments, bringing your lips back to hers. “You’re so beautiful, y/n.”
And you can’t help but scoff a little. “Yeah maybe for now, until I turn old and wrinkly.”
“You humans and age. Being old does not equate to being ugly. Aging is a blessing.”
You let out a pained sigh at her statement, not satisfied with the way she tries to keep you human. “Well that would be easy for you to say. You’re gonna look young and hot forever.”
Shuri raises her eyebrow, one that shows you she has a smart remark to say.
“You think I’m hot?”
“Fuck you!,” you reply, playfully hitting Shuri’s shoulder. “You’re annoying.”
“I wasn’t so annoying when I let you ride me the other night, now was I?”
You felt your cheeks flame up in embarrassment.
“Shuri, oh Shuri! Right there, yes!,” she mocks before she subtly laughs at you. You pick up the pillow beside you and slam it against her.
“Asshole!”
Shuri could not help but laugh at you and as you attempted to hit her once again, her vampire reflexes caught you off guard, halting you before you got to her.
“Show off.”
“Only sometimes.”
Once more, her lips capture you as she draws you closer. This kiss is unhurried and seductive, syncing with the rhythm of your heart as you encircle your arms around her neck, surrendering to the intoxicating sensations she evokes within you.
“You look beautiful by the way…when you work for it.”
“Shuri—”
“Really though. I should make you ride me more often. You’re so sexy like that.”
Her words nearly elicited a moan from you, but you held back, keeping your lips connected to hers as she spoke. You were determined not to give her the full satisfaction.
“You’re a dick.”
“Watch your mouth.”
Slowly, her mouth trailed down to your throat, kissing tenderly against the scar that she left from the first and last time she drank from you.
“This is healing nicely.”
“Yeah…well,” you comment with an attitude you swore was subtle but Shuri knew you better.
“What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong with what?”
“You, y/n. Are you ok? Did I upset you?”
You said nothing.
“I know you have something to say, princess. Spill it.”
You could feel the nerves kindling within you, unable to escape the realization of how apparent it must be to Shuri that something was tugging at your heart.
“How come you don’t drink my blood anymore when we have sex?” Not exactly what you wanted to ask, but it was a question that was burning at you nonetheless. Shuri sighed, peeling her eyes off of you for a moment before proceeding. “Did I do something wrong? Do I taste weird or something??”
“Don’t do that, y/n. It’s not on you. And trust me…you are the best I’ve ever tasted.”
“Then what is it, Shuri?? I don’t get it.”
“Of course you don’t get it. How could you?”
“Baby…please.”
Shuri took a momentary pause, a brief silence hanging in the air, as if collecting her thoughts or contemplating her next words.
“I do not want to lose control again. I almost…I almost didn’t stop the first time. I don’t want that to happen again.”
“But you did stop, Shuri. You did. You need to cut yourself some slack. You did so good and it felt so good for me and I know it felt good for you too. I want you to drink from me again when we fuck.” You couldn't avoid appearing somewhat needy, maybe even a tad bit whiny, but you were unbothered by that. The desire to experience that closeness with her again was paramount, and you were confident she shared the same longing.
“But what if I—”
“Ssshh, Shuri. You won’t hurt me. I just want us to be able to experience each other to the fullest. You’re a vampire and I love that about you. I want you to know that I’m ok and that I want you to drink from me, especially when we have sex.”
Your words made Shuri ache, her pussy clenched at the way you craved her the way she craved you. “Ok but…if I hurt you—”
“Ah ah! You won’t, baby. I trust you.”
Once again, her gentle lips found yours as she moaned into you right before she abruptly detached from you.
“Ok, now what is it you really want to say to me?,” she questions, her deep understanding of you almost angers you, especially when you wish to simply just run away from certain situations.
“What?”
“Do not play stupid with me, s’thandwa. You cannot run away from me. Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“Shuri…please.”
“Uh uh. Speak.”
You sat there on her lap, admiring her beautiful features, the stern yet soft look she gave you now made your stomach churn, wanting to run away from your burning desire but the more you choked it down, the more it became harder to breathe.
“I…why did you never answer me when I asked you to turn me?”
The softness in her face diminished to something harsher, her features melting into seriousness and it frightened you a bit.
“It’s not what you want, y/n.”
You sneer at this, annoyed at how easily she makes that claim for you. “If it wasn’t what I wanted, I wouldn’t have asked you. Now would I?”
Shuri shakes her head at you, a smirk appearing on her face before speaking. “This mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble one day.”
“Please Shuri, can you be serious for one second. I’m not joking.”
“I know you aren’t.”
“Then please just…stop messing with me.”
“I’m not messing with you.”
“Shur—”
Your words were halted by Shuri's finger pressing gently against your lips. Her eyes scanned your entire face before settling back on your plump lips, swollen from your fervent yearning for her.
“Just please…shut up for a second.”
As the all-too-familiar sensation of her lips meeting yours washes over you, you whimper into her, yearning for her and everything she embodies as you welcome her intense kisses.
“Please.” It was all you could say, and you weren’t even sure what it was you were asking for at the moment. What you do know is that your body is aflame, your mouth ablaze as her tongue glides between the curves of your sweet lips.
“I want you forever,” you moaned into her mouth.
"Mhmmm," she responded, surrendering as you trailed your kisses along her angular jawline, deepening them the further you descended down her body. It didn't take much time before she took off her shirt, providing room for your mouth to explore the curves of her abdomen, and your sloppy tongue made Shuri’s pussy clench in anticipation. Slipping your hand beneath her shorts, you ran your fingers through her boxers, chuckling at how damp she already was. All this mess between her thighs as a result of her love for you, her desperate need for you. Your poor baby was absolutely soaking the whole time.
“You’re so wet, Shuri.”
“Fuck,” she moaned, bucking her hips forward for the friction she evidently craved.
“Let me eat your pussy, baby, yeah? I wanna taste that mess between your thighs.”
“Fuck. Yes, y/n. P-please.”
Hearing Shuri trip over her words as you pleasured her was a sound you would never get tired of. It made your body ache with a passion, to hear her voice diminish down to desperate pleas as you pressed your tongue against the swell of her clit, and it didn’t take long for your mouth to find her pussy. Once you ripped off her clothing and admired the shimmer that reflected off her needy cunt, you took your fingers and splayed her folds open and your mouth found her clit like a magnet, wrapping your lips around her sensitive bud before your tongue ran laps around her.
“Oh,” she faintly moaned, a habit she would do as she struggled to contain her moans but you always took it as a challenge, making sure you left her in nothing but trembling shambles as you pleased her. It was easy to see she was trying her best to hold in her moans, the way her throat let out choked whimpers every time you lapped up into her but the minute you spat on her pussy and inserted two fingers inside, you made it a challenge on her to contain the sounds of pleasure that reckoned to rip right through her.
“OH…y-yeah…yes, y/n, just like that. Oh fuck.”
Your lips lifted into a smile, proceeding to suck on her pounding clit as you felt her pussy walls clench around your fingers. She was so needy, so evidently desperate for you and you felt nothing but the same for her.
“You taste so sweet, baby,” you hummed into her. “Cum on my face. I want you to cum on my face.”
“M’kay, okay…fuck, baby.” Her high pitched whimpers made your pussy throb, the sound and smell of her squelching cunt made you fuck into her faster and harder, continuously tapping that spot inside her that you knew would make her lose it.
“Unh!”
You gaze up at her, convinced that the sight alone justifies your yearning for eternal life. The radiance of her sweaty dark skin, the rhythmic contraction of her abs as her pussy closes around you, but her face was the purest of all. Her mouth hung ajar, jaw slack, singing profanities of pleasure, her eyes grappling to connect with yours as she resists the urge to roll them back. In this moment, she is at her most vulnerable, her weakest, and observing her let her guard down is something you desire to witness for the rest of your days. And that was not even the best part; the best part was what was to come next, as you wrapped your lips around her, siphoning her swollen clit and plunging before her body released right onto your face as she came.
“Princess! Oh…UNH!”
And there it was: your favorite part. Observing the transformation in her face as her orgasm resonated through her. The shift in her irises to a deep red hue, her fangs extending to their fullest length, all while she fought to maintain control over her body amid the orgasm wracking through her was truly a sight you alone could cum from.
“UNH!”
“Yes, baby. Keep fucking my face. Give me all of your cum.”
“Oh…fuck.”
Her pussy is hard to let go of, something you latch onto even as she’s whining and shuddering in overstimulation. You lap her up like you're starving, slurping every drop of her warm juice before she grabs your hair and forces you off of her. You whine at this, wanting more but you knew she had reached her limit as you rested your head on her chest, waiting for her body to cease its trembling.
“You c-can’t do shit like that, y-y/n. I could hurt y-you,” she struggles to say and that sight makes you smirk with pride.
“Awww, poor baby. No way you can hurt me when you’re shaking like this. You must’ve cum hard as fuck,” you taunted in faux sympathy.
“Sh-shut up. You forget I could s-snap you,” she tries to snark back, but her struggle to come back down was not helping her tough image. You chuckle before kissing her pouting lips.
“Talk like that all you want, baby, but we both know you love when I put my mouth on you.”
You kiss once more before she decides to take matters into her own hands.
“It’s your turn,” she comments, suddenly pinning you down beneath her and your body is heated, writhing in anticipation before you are inconveniently disturbed by the sound of your phone ringing.
“Fuck,” Shuri spits.
“Shit. My mom is calling me.”
Shuri groans in frustration, rolling over beside you dramatically as you answer the phone.
“I know, babe, but she never calls me. Could be an emergency.”
"Fine," Shuri seethes, with an exaggerated eye roll, and you can't help but chuckle at her flair for drama. Shuri tunes into your conversation, vampire ears catching your mother's voice on the other end of the line, and you're well aware of it.
“You were listening, weren’t you?,” you question once you hang up.
“I was.”
“You’re so fucking nosey.”
Shuri just shrugs her shoulders. “Soooo, are you going to go see your parents like she asked?”
“I really don’t want to. I already know what they’re going to talk about and I don’t wanna hear it. But I guess I should go. I honestly haven’t spoken to them since Jon…”
You chose not to finish your sentence but Shuri had no problem doing it for you. “You mean since I ate your asshole of an ex??”
“Yeah…that.”
“You know, I have yet to meet your parents. I’ve known you for just over a year now, and you almost never speak about them.”
“And what is a year to you? Aren’t you like 500?”
“You think you are so funny.”
“You love my jokes,” you tease. “But really, there’s a good reason as to why you haven’t met them. Trust me, you do not wanna meet them.”
“I think it would be good for me to meet them.”
“Yeaaahhh, no. Not gonna happen.”
“Why not?”
“Because I said so, Shuri. I don’t get along with them. And besides they’re…old school. They would never accept you and me.”
Laughter escapes Shuri, finding you incredibly adorable as you worry about what her meeting them might do.
“Do you forget who I am, princess? If there is anyone who understands old school, it would be me. I would love to meet your parents. I understand you might not have the best relationship with them, but I think it would be good for us to go together. Just tell them you’re inviting a friend, there is no need to tell them that we are in a relationship if you do not want to. You do that on your own time. But I would love to meet them,”
You say nothing.
“Please?”
“You know what? Fuck it! Fine! You can meet them but don’t be surprised when things go left. I’m warning you, Shuri. They’re weird.”
“I’m with you, aren’t I? I can handle weird.”
“Fuck you!,” you say, playfully hitting her once more with the pillow and she lets you this time.
“Wait…how am I supposed to tell them that we gotta meet them at night?”
“Just tell them what I told you. Tell them I’m allergic to the sun.”
You take a moment to ponder the situation before agreeing. She nods quietly and then departs, leaving you with your thoughts, the absence of her presence leaving a lingering sense of contemplation in the air.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
Sitting at the dining room table, where Shuri had left her food untouched, and your parents bombarded you with questions about your future, felt like your heart could plummet to the depths of your stomach. The atmosphere, filled with nothing but painful memories, was sheer torture. Although you were aware that having Shuri witness the deceitfulness of your parents would be difficult, you were never truly ready for the frustration that would ignite beneath your skin.
“You barely touched your food, Shuri. Is there a problem?,” your mother asked.
“I told you she wasn’t hungry mom, just leave her alone,” you groaned, making no effort to hide your irritation.
“That is no way to talk to your mother, y/n,” your father chimed in with his unwanted comments that always made your blood boil.
“Mhmmm.”
There came an awkward silence, with nothing but the sound of utensils scraping against plates with all eyes unmistakingly fixed on you, including Shuri’s.
“What happened to you?,” your mother asked, pointing to the scar on your neck and you could just sense the subtle smirk on Shuri’s face.
“It’s nothing.”
“It doesn’t look like nothing.”
“Can ya’ll just say what you wanna say already?,” you slightly burst. “I know why you called me here and I think it would be the best for everyone here if we forget the fucking scar and just get on with it.”
Your parents looked at each other before looking at you, both with a stern look that truly did frighten you a little but you wouldn’t dare let that show.
“Your future, y/n. The passing of Jonathan has left you with no money for your future. He was the plan all along and now he is gone…what do you plan on doing now with yourself??,” your father asked, his demeaning voice and commanding presence reverberating through the room, making the patter of your heart quicken. Your discomfort was evidently apparent to Shuri, and this was made known with the way she discreetly rubbed your thigh beneath the table.
“Dad…please—”
“Listen to your father, y/n. We say this because we care for you.”
“Care for me?? Well that’s a first, isn’t it??,” you snarked beneath your breath, purposely loud enough for their ears to catch.
“You need to find a new partner soon. We think we have someone who is interested…”
The rest of what was said drifted from you, nothing but the sound of static overcame the nonsense that you just knew was pouring out of your parents mouths. You felt nauseous, like the wind had just been knocked out of you and you could pass out at any moment. You just wanted to be free, free from the expectations your parents have put on you since you were a child; free from them using you as a pawn to bring more wealth into their family. You wanted out.
“Y/n,” Shuri chimed in, trying her best to comfort you. “Breathe baby, breathe. I’m right here,” she said not with her mouth but with her mind.
“And who are you, may I ask?,” your father interrupted, his deep voice breaking the calm that was once Shuri’s voice and you were afraid of what his confrontation would escalate into.
“Dad, please don’t start,” you muttered with a feeling of knowing exactly where this was headed. You knew Shuri and you knew your father and neither of them made room for disrespect.
“Hey…it’s ok,” Shuri murmured to you as her gaze softened in reassurance. But the look in her eyes didn’t escape your father’s notice, rather deepening his suspicions. You could see the anger simmering behind his heavy glare, that look that always made you fearful of him as a child. His demeanor shifted, the tension thickening as he repeated his question.
"Who. Are. You??,” he demanded, each word laced with venom. You knew instantly that he’d figured it out. Your father was an observant man who never failed to hide his disdain for the gay community. His hatred ran deep, and it was precisely one reason why you had always feared introducing Shuri to him. When his cold gaze shifted to you, a wave of numbness washed through your entire body.
“You brought a dyke into my home, y/n?”
“Dad…please, not right now.”
“Oh, we are doing this right now.”
The tension in the room was suffocating, hanging thick in the air like a storm about to break. Every sound seemed sharper, every movement slower, as if the very walls held their breath.
“Sir, if I may speak—”
“And why are you here with my daughter? Who are you and what are you doing here??”
A change flickered across Shuri’s face, the look of someone ready to face a challenge and it was an expression you recognized all too well.
“Shuri…please,” you softly begged.
“He’s disrespecting you and I don’t like that.” But her eyes stayed locked on your father’s. The silent exchange between them spoke volumes, a tension mirrored in the cold expressions of both your parents. Panic rose to the brim of your throat as you shot to your feet and grabbed her wrist, desperately trying to pull her toward the door and away from this place. But she stood her ground, unmoving and frozen.
“I am her father. I’m the one who raised her. Who are you to come into my home and talk to me that way??”
“Your daughter does not want to marry whoever it is you think you have in mind. She is a grown woman and her own person. She does not want him. She will never love him. And she sure as hell will never marry him!”
“And why is that?? Because you came into the picture?? A good for nothing dyke? You are a perversion of humanity, a disgust to God’s eyes and you do not deserve to know my daughter! I will never allow this!”
Shuri’s anger flared, and you noticed the faint red glow in her eyes. Just as you moved to intervene, she did exactly what you feared; she lunged at your father, her anger uncontrollably lashing. In an instant, she was on him, sinking her teeth into his throat with a terrifying, blood-fueled rage.
“SHURI!!”
Your mother’s scream pierced the air as your father struggled, desperate and terrified, trying to shove Shuri off him. Panic gripped you as you shouted her name.
“SHURI! SHURI, STOP!”
It was the desperation and fear in your voice that pulled her back to you. Her fangs retracted, and her eyes slowly returned to their usual color as she turned to look at you. Your fathers blood stained her face, dripping down her jaw while your trembling father reached for the gun hidden in the drawer. He did not hesitate to point the barrel right at her and you felt as if your heart was going to burst out of your chest. In a second, a deafening BANG rang through the room before the bullet struck Shuri in the abdomen, but she didn’t even flinch. Blood flowed freely, yet the wound sealed itself almost instantly, faster than you could exhale. The complete and utter terror on your parents face as your father shot once more, only to have the same outcome, was enough to make you almost collapse and pass out.
“Stay away from me de-demon…,” your dad stuttered while your mother held onto him for dear life, and you had never felt so afraid for what was to come next.
“Y/n, I need you to leave the room…now,” Shuri said sternly in such a matter that you knew she meant it but you did not care.
“I’m not leaving, are you crazy??”
“Now! Before I actually hurt them!”
Her words smacked you in the face, and the look in her eyes told you she was leaving no room for disobedience. Reluctantly, you stepped away, but stayed close enough to overhear what was unfolding. What you caught were only snippets of Shuri’s voice and an unsettling silence from your parents. Curiosity gnawed at you, and you held your breath as you peeked around the corner. There was Shuri, speaking to both your parents as if she had them under a trance. Your parents stood frozen, their bodies unmoving, and a chill ran down your spine, goosebumps prickling to the surface of your skin. The sight made you shiver as you struggled to keep from collapsing. Why hadn’t she told you about this when you first questioned her about being a vampire? The realization dawned on you: mind control. And now you couldn’t help but wonder if she had ever used it on you.
“Fuck. You weren’t supposed to see that,” Shuri snarled, grabbing your wrist harshly as she pulled you both out the door, out of your parents' presence, and into a painfully quiet car ride.
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“What the fuck was that?,” you irritably asked.
“Do not start with me right now, y/n.”
“Don’t sta—? Excuse me?? Have you lost your fucking mind??”
Shuri flopped down onto the sofa assertively, sitting man spread as she leaned back, rubbing her face with an air of agitation and impatience. It seemed as though she was deliberately ignoring your words.
“Hello? Earth to Shuri?? What, am I talking to myself here??”
“Might as well be.”
“You are…so fucking fucked up. My dad? Really, Shuri??”
“He’s lucky that’s all I did.”
You felt a jolt of shock, your eyes widening as you were rendered speechless. The nonchalant tone in her words stirred frustration in your stomach, and you struggled to contain your rising temper when upset.
“So what? Someone doesn’t like you and what, you kill them? You’re fucking unwell!”
She didn’t answer, just scoffed like you weren’t even there.
“And when were you going to tell me about how you can control minds or whatever the fuck that was?? Don’t you think that’s important information about you I should know?!”
“So you did see that…?,” she whispered under her breath with a subtle chuckle, her head bowed in shame as she fought to connect her eyes to yours.
“Yes I fucking saw that. Like you really just fucking looked at my parents and made them forget all that shit right infront of my fucking eyes like it was nothing…like you really just did that and never thought to fucking tell me??”
“So what, y/n?? Did you want me to let them remember that I almost killed your father?? Would that have been the rational thing to do?!”
“I’m only saying it would have been nice to know! That’s information I deserve to know, is it not? I’m your fucking girlfriend, am I right?!”
“If I had told you, you would walk the rest of our relationship questioning if it was real, correct?”
You said nothing.
“Yeah, that is what I thought. I have my reasons as to why I do or do not tell you things. Do not question my decisions to do so…”
“Yeah whatever, Shuri. Let’s be all dismissive and inconsiderate. Let’s all just get angry and eat people like fucking psychopaths!,” you yelled in a sarcastic tone but your anger was anything but sarcasm.
“And you want to be just like me, right? Is that not what you want? To be a vampire for the rest of your days? Let me tell you something…that is what being a vampire is!”
“I don’t believe that.”
“Don’t piss me off, y/n.”
Her words were delivered in an almost quiet and restrained manner, as if they were small and insignificant. But beneath the surface of calmness, you sensed a simmering anger that was on the brink of breaking through her skin; the intensity of her emotions was palpable despite the softness of her voice.
“Do you see what I have to go through everyday in my life?? THAT is what I’ll have to deal with and THAT is what I want to run away from. As long as I’m human, they are all I have! And I’m nothing but a tool for them! A means to bring in wealth to their pockets because they’re nothing but scum and I want out!”
“Have you not listened to a word I’ve said?” Her sudden change in tone sent a chill down your spine, its sharpness and intensity striking a nerve. “How it has been hell on earth for me??”
The hurt in her eyes and the pain in her voice gave you an immediate pang of regret and empathy.
“So what?? You want us to be together until I die? And you move on?” Your voice caught in your throat, choked by the effort of holding back tears. Each word felt like a struggle as emotions welled up inside you, threatening to spill over.
“Yes. Because that’s the way it’s supposed to be.”
You were consumed by a mix of hurt and anger, emotions swirling within you like a turbulent storm. The room around you fell into an oppressive silence, a quiet that was deafening, emphasizing the profound impact of the emotional turmoil you fought so hard to keep at bay.
“When your dad said those things to me, called me those names, it stirred up old memories I thought I'd forgotten and I simply lost it. The way society used to treat people like you and me, it was so difficult to live even as a vampire. I used to be called every name in the book, treated like scum because where does a black lesbian woman fit into society in the 1800’s? How about in the 20’s? Or the 50’s? There was none. You guys have no idea what it means to not be who you are meant to be.”
“Why didn’t you leave?”
“What?”
“You’re a vampire. You could live anywhere in the world and anytime you wanted. Why would you stay in America of all places?”
A soft chuckle escapes her, followed by a small tilt in her smile as she quietly rolls her eyes. “I did the stupidest thing a vampire could ever do.”
Confusion washed over you like a wave, leaving your expression visibly puzzled.
“I fell in love.”
“Oh.”
“I had been alone for so many years and that was the first time in my 100 years of being a vampire, had I felt alive and full…and human.”
“Who was she?”
“She was…perfect.”
A small smile appeared on your face before it quickly washed away. “Was she…the girl in my dream? The one you gave me…”
She nodded.
“She wanted you to turn her.”
“Yes.”
“Did you?”
She shook her head.
“No.”
“Why not? You loved her. You wanted to be with her forever, right? So why not just turn her??”
“I know what you’re doing, y/n. I’m not doing this right now.”
“But…please.”
The air between the two of you grew still and quiet, filled only with the weight of unspoken words. The silence stretched on, punctuated by the sound of distant waves rolling outside her home. It felt like there was a physical barrier between you, leaving an uncomfortable tension in its wake and so you raised your voice a little.
“Why don’t you just answer my question??”
“Do you not understand?? Being a vampire took everything I’ve ever loved away from me. That is what I’m trying to tell you. My mom, my friends, my family…the list is endless.”
You walked over to her and took your place beside her, leaning your head gently on her shoulder as the fabric of her shirt collected your tears before you kissed her shoulder. Despite the sorrow that filled both your hearts, your presence conveyed a quiet reassurance for Shuri as it always does. And that’s why she loves you; you shared an embrace in the face of emotional vulnerability.
“I’m so sorry life was unkind to you, Shuri, and I’m sorry being a vampire has been nothing but hell for you.”
You looked up at her with swollen, beady eyes; the aftermath of your tears evident in your pout.
“But the difference between you and me, Shuri, is that vampirism took from you because you actually had something to lose. You had a home, a family, friends, status…I don’t have anything. Nothing. You’re all I have…and I don’t want to lose you too.”
Shuri gazed down at you with a mixture of hurt and love in her eyes, a complex blend of emotions that spoke volumes. As she leaned forward, her lips brushed gently against your forehead in a tender gesture and you exhaled in relief before she abruptly stood up.
“I’m going to go take a walk.”
“But the sun will be up in a couple hours,” you respond with genuine concern.
“I’ll be back. I just need fresh air.”
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
A few hours passed by and you grew concerned as you waited anxiously. Finally, you hear sounds of movement emanating from the kitchen, and a wave of relief washes over you as Shuri returns.
“Finally, I was beginning to worry.” You approach the kitchen but she doesn’t respond. “Shuri?”
But it wasn't Shuri. Your heart nearly leapt out of your chest with fear as you entered the kitchen to find a total stranger making herself comfortable in Shuri's kitchen. The stranger was strikingly beautiful, with a deep and flawless complexion. Her hair was intricately braided in goddess braids, a wave of intertwined hair and curls that fell down to her hips, and her lips had the rich fullness of a summer rose in full bloom. All her features harmonized to form one of the most beautiful faces you had ever seen. What intrigued you the most, however, was the uncanny familiarity of her face, despite being certain you had never met her before.
“Who…who are you?,” you stammered, your shaky voice hard to contain but the woman did not answer you verbally; instead she returned your answer with a soft smile that should have been comforting but the glassy conceit in her eyes sent shivers through your entire body.
“Who are you??,” you asked once more, raising your voice a bit but still, she said nothing.
“I’m going to call—”
“Who?? Shuri??,” she cuts you off, a villainous smirk graces her face, a twisted expression that holds genuine amusement and you could feel your heart quicken beneath your ribcage.
“How do you know Shuri?”
“Oh me and her go way back,” she says so ‘matter-of-factly’.
“Wait, are you a—”
Once more, she interrupts you, appearing in front of you in a mere millisecond with a gust of air that brushes against your body. You gulp slightly as she stares you down, her eyes tinged with judgment. Fear envelops you like a suffocating cloak, yet you remain still, unwilling to challenge the woman who seemed delighted in the fear she instilled upon you.
You hear the door open behind you, and a slight sense of relief washes over you. The woman behind you breaks into a full, sinister smile.
"At last," she whispers, taking a seat on the island in Shuri's kitchen. When Shuri entered the premises, it was the most frightened and shocked you had ever seen her, her eyes seeped in fear and confusion at the image before her. But it isn’t too long before that fear is stripped away with anger, her fists balled up in frustration as both her and the unknown woman stared each other down.
"Shuri... Who is she?," you ask, breaking the stomach-churning silence.
“Please answer her, she’s already asked me twice and it's getting annoying,” the woman snarked.
“Adanna…you…you’re alive??”
“Oh, I very much died, but you know how the rest goes, I suppose,” she replies with a smirk.
“Who is she, Shuri??” Your voice takes on an edge, the words clipped and pointed. There's a noticeable tension in your words, as if each syllable is strained through gritted teeth.
“Ugh, answer your pest-of-a girl!”
Shuri's demeanor shifts noticeably as a veil of shame descends over her, her shoulders lower with a weight of embarrassment. For a moment, she does what she usually does in times like this, avoiding direct eye contact before she speaks.
“Remember that dream I gave you? The girl I showed you…? Well…that’s her.”
You remember in an instant. Recollections flood back, including Shuri's words about her passing from old age. The anger you feel is overwhelming and beyond words.
“The girl from your dream??”
Shuri nods, not even looking at you, her eyes still on the other woman.
“You…Shuri look at me!”
And she does. Without question.
“You told me she died of old age. You lied to me??”
The woman bursts into a cynical laughter. “Really Shuri? I ‘died’?? Well y/n, tell me more. What else did Shuri say about me? I’d love to hear this,” she chuckles but her admiration was sincere. You glanced at Shuri, almost seeking permission to proceed, but the notion of needing her approval quickly faded as you uncomfortably settled into the situation you were in. You were eager to uncover more about Adanna. Things that Shuri had never disclosed to you.
“That’s all she said about you. But…she showed me you…in a dream. You were human. You wanted Shuri to turn you. She drank your blood.” The details from the vivid dream began to replay and flood back into your memory. Adanna’s expression softened, resembling the poor, desperate girl that Shuri held in your dream.
"What happened to you?" Shuri interjects, genuine concern etched across her face as she observes her from a distance. Adanna's attention swiftly shifts from you to Shuri, her whole body radiating hurt and rage before she speaks.
“How dare you…” The words were spat in such a way that made your muscles tense. “You happened, Shuri! You came into my life and now what?? You are going to do the same thing to her!”
“No…I will not.”
“It’s too late, Shuri. You’ve already thought of it. I’ll tell you what’s going to happen…” She smiles devilishly, casting a quick glance in your direction before striding towards Shuri, the sound of her heels echoing loudly in your ears. “You’re going to fall desperately in love with her, if you haven’t already, you’re going to live a short life with her and then she will grow old and die. And that’s if she’s one of the lucky ones, you know how fragile they are. As long as she’s human, death will always be simple for her.”
She moves swiftly behind you, using her speed and strength to press your body against hers, as she gently wraps her hand around your throat, not to choke you, but to evoke fear in both you and Shuri at what she was capable of.
“Don’t even think about it or I’ll hurt her.”
“Please Adanna, leave her out of this.” Worry clouded Shuri’s eyes and it broke you.
“I can tell you really love her. So why won’t you turn her?? Why keep her this fragile and pathetic human being??” Her grip on your throat slightly tightens and you thickly swallow beneath her.
“You know why.”
“Oh I know full well…but does she??” She lets go of your throat, before taking a finger and caresses the thick artery that runs along the side of your neck, Your heart is pulsing in absolute terror and she chuckles at the way your body reacts to her.
“Don’t you dare hurt her.”
“Shut the hell up!”
You unwillingly tremble at her loud words.
“Oh baby, don’t look so scared,” she taunts. She skims your throat again, caressing the fang work from Shuri’s indulgence of you. “I see she’s had her fair share of you.”
You swallow, your throat bobbing beneath her touch.
“She’s really good in bed, isn’t she?”
Fear grips your eyes as you glance at her, and she giggles at your visible apprehension.
“It’s ok baby, you can admit it. I know all too well. She used to fuck me stupid too. But back in the day, people were not as…accepting of our lifestyle. I mean, really? What could be worse than being a gay, black woman in the 1920’s?? But that only made it so much more fun, right Shuri?? We had a blast didn’t we, babe? On the bar after work hours, cars in the back lane, under my dress at speakeasy tables?? Hotel rooms, back rooms…the fear of being caught… what a thrill.”
“That’s enough!”
She smiles and strides confidently toward Shuri, standing slightly over her in tall heels. With a sudden gesture, she lightly grips Shuri's jaw, catching the both of you off guard.
“Or what? What are you gonna do, baby? Kill me? We both know you never could.” She lets go of her jaw and trails her finger down her chest, admiring Shuri’s beauty and the sight makes your stomach twist; a surge of jealousy and protectiveness washes over you but what could your fragile body possibly do in a situation like this?
“You’ve gotten even sexier over the years, mm mm mm. The way I just wanna…this same chiseled jaw, used to drive me crazy.”
“Adanna…leave.”
“I guess I should, the sun will be rising soon. Or…I could just…stay here.”
“No.”
“Loosen up a bit, I’m joking.” She strides confidently toward you, locking eyes and observing the rise and fall of your chest with each labored breath.
“It was nice meeting you, y/n.”
She departed swiftly, her presence lingering like a chilling echo in the room long after she was gone.
The silence that engulfed the space between you and Shuri after Adanna's departure was suffocatingly dense. It echoed with the weight of unanswered questions and unresolved emotions, leaving a void that seemed to amplify with each and every heartbeat and breath that escaped you.
You allowed the silence to linger before stepping up to slap Shuri—a stinging blow that likely hurt you more than it did her, though you refused to show it. Shuri adjusted her jaw slightly from the impact, further fueling your building anger.
“You got something to say?!”
Shuri scoffs and starts to walk away, leaving you feeling as if your skin is melting.
“Hey…hey! I’m talking to you!”
She paces and smashes her table as if it were made of sand. You flinch, almost afraid of her intensity, but you're determined not to show your fear.
“So you turned that bitch but you won’t turn me??”
Finally her eyes meet yours. “Have you lost your damn mind, y/n?”
“Nah, I could ask you the same thing, Shuri! Because what was that?? All of that, what was it?? You gonna talk to me about how your 100 year old ex-girlfriend that apparently died from old age, was just in front of me? As a vampire…Shuri you LIED to me!”
“I did and I do not regret my decision to do so.”
The feeling of hurt and betrayal began to manifest in your body in physical ways, a sharp pain jabbing into your chest as if your heart was physically pierced. Your throat tightened up as a rush of heat and cold scattered through the thinning veins beneath your skin. Your body physically ached for her truth.
“Shuri, what is this?? What are we?? Do you like being in control? Powerful?? Is that it?? You like that your mind games are easier to play on my human brain? I don’t understand!”
“Don’t even start with me right now, y/n. I’m not in the mood.”
“You’re not in the mo—oh…ok. Ok then. I see how it is. Here you go with this bullshit. Explaining to me at your convenience! Leaving me in the dark and for what?! You know what?? I’m not doing this right now. I’m going home.”
“Home?”
“Yeah, that’s what the fuck I said.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, y/n.”
“You gonna stop me??”
“You are not going out there! She could be out there doing god knows what!”
“I’m not scared of her.”
“Well you should be!”
“And why is that, Shuri?? Because she’s a vampire?? Because she kills people?? Last time I checked, so do you. And I’m not afraid of you. Fuck you!”
“You are…fuck…you are pissing me off.”
“Boo hoo.” You roll your eyes, a gesture that pushes Shuri dangerously close to the edge. The last thing she wants is to lose her temper like she did in front of your parents.
“Don’t be ridiculous. Put your shit down, you are not leaving here,” she comments as you start packing your things but you ignore her.
“Y/n…y/n!”
“Fuck off!”
As you're about to leave and reach for the door, she rushes behind you and slams it shut with a bang, blocking your escape.
“Shuri…move.”
“You won’t make me.”
You turn around to face her, finding yourself trapped between the door she has forcefully shut and her imposing figure. Despite her menacing presence, her face betrays a hint of worry, making it challenging for you to maintain your anger.
“Let me go.”
“No.”
You arched your eyebrow, letting out a slight chuckle while Shuri stood puzzled. What could possibly be so amusing to you at this moment?
“If you need company, I’m sure Adanna is wandering around somewhere and since you’ve fucked her brains out too, I’m sure she’s all too willing to come back and give you a mind-blowing night,” you snapped, struggling to conceal your jealousy, though by now, Shuri can easily read you like an open book.
“Now you are just being childish.”
“No. I’m leaving because you’re pissing me off.”
Your second attempt to leave was as successful as the first time, with your back against the door and Shuri's hand gently snaking your throat, careful not to cut off your oxygen intake. In that silent moment, your eyes locked, conveying a power dynamic that both thrilled and frustrated you. As long as you were human, this imbalance persisted; a blend of love and resentment. Even now, Shuri's proximity was irresistible, her scent enveloping you and despite the anger you felt, the strength she had over you went beyond mere physical, vampiric strength.
“Why must you be so difficult?”
Both of you were engulfed in anger towards each other, driven by a mutual fear of losing one another. Your actions appeared selfish and impulsive, but deep down, you both dreaded the thought of being alone, knowing that each other was all you had.
“I’m not being difficult, Shuri. My request is simple. I’m only asking you to turn me.”
“And don’t you think I would have a long time ago if it was the right thing for you?” Her voice was gentle and soothing, a juxtaposition of the rage she felt.
“This is the right thing for me. You are the right thing for me.”
Your eyes softened, and hers mirrored yours. Your breathing picked up immensely and Shuri did not even try to hide her gaze plastered on the way your breasts rose with each sharp breath you took in. Her glare evolved from soft and gentle to intense and purposeful, reflecting the shift from a pure emotional connection to a more primal and physical desire. She was lustful and so were you.
The tension in the air thickened quickly, like a weight settling over the both of you. Unspoken emotions and anticipation hung heavily between you, making every moment feel charged and intense. Gazes lingered longer than they meant to, words became unspoken, and the way Shuri’s palm stayed on your throat made you gulp in desire, wanting her to push your limits like she always does.
“Drink from me.” Your words were tinged with an unmistakable craving for her and you could not help but be slightly embarrassed; how pathetic you were to beg after trying so hard to stay mad at her. “It’s been too long, baby, I need it.”
Her palm sits fairly firm against your windpipe and you inhale sharply as you feel the warmth between your legs dampen.
“I can smell you, princess.”
“See, this is what I mean. This power imbalance between us…it drives me nuts. Nothing is fair between us if you keep this from me.”
Shuri hoists you closer to her by your throat, bringing your lips in for the ghost of a kiss, an exchange of warmth before she fully presses her lips against yours and she moans into your mouth, a sound that nestled so deeply between your thick thighs.
You jump into her arms before she carries you to the bedroom, not once detaching her lips from yours. As she steps foot into the bedroom, she places you roughly on her vanity, clearing space for your plush ass to hit the surface. Shuri tears your clothing aggressively, greedy to see your beautiful body as she leaves you in nothing but your undergarments. You gasp as goosebumps rise to the surface of your skin due to the mix of sudden cold air and her warm touch. It didn’t take long before her hands found your bra and ripped that off too, getting caught in the beauty of your breasts and the way they jiggled with your pretty gasps. For a moment, your eyes connected before her gaze trailed down to the wet patch seeping through your panties and Shuri can’t help but release a condescending laughter.
“I thought you said I pissed you off. But look at you, s’thandwa. You’re so wet. Do you hate me or want me?”
"Both," you exclaimed with a desperate intensity, feeling the anger towards her fueling the fire beneath your skin, expressing just how much you craved her touch.
"Mhmm," she murmured as her hand trailed down to the damp spot between your thighs that grew by the second, creating slow circles with the pad of her thumb and you cried with ache. Shuri adored your soft pleas of desire above all else. While she relished your moaning turning into screams of overwhelming pleasure, it was your gentle whining and whimpering that stirred her vampiric instincts to the brink, challenging her ability to suppress her true nature. You were aware of this, and you reveled in it. You enjoyed pushing her to her limits, knowing she would never physically hurt you.
With care, she slid the thin panties to the side, watching the way your sticky arousal clung to the fabric. She carefully slid a finger down your slit, just enough to be overwhelming yet not quite satisfying enough.
“Oh,” you breathed out as she caressed your beating bud, her lips attacking your throat once again as your fingers cling to the coils on her head.
“I don’t care about a power imbalance…until it comes to this,” she whispered to you, bringing her hands down to your thighs, kneading the flesh before she spread them open a bit more. Her mouth on your throat went from kissing the skin to sucking it, a gesture that was sure to leave bruised marks and your heart quickened at the anticipation of feeling her sink into you.
“Breathe, baby, breathe. Your heart is pounding…why?”
“Please…Shuri…”
“Tell me.”
“Drink my blood. Please, baby, please.”
A crooked smile appeared before she looked for any hint of hesitation in your eyes but there was none to be found. You wanted this, needed it, just as much as she did and that made her turn insatiable, almost afraid that her crave for you would overcome rational thought.
She grabbed your jaw, forcing your gaze up on hers. “You want me to drink from you, y/n?”
You nodded with such urgency that it felt embarrassing. She smirked, lowering her mouth for a fleeting kiss just above the side of your throat. Your heart raced, nearly bursting out of your chest. Yet when she offered only a light kiss without delving deeper, you felt annoyed and disappointed, still craving the satisfaction that had consumed you.
“Please, Sh—,” but you were cut off with a slender finger to your lips, giving you one last peck on your pouted mouth before she gets down on her knees in front of you, placing wet, devoted kisses from your stomach down to the area just above your pussy. Shuri loved dragging you to your release, watching your body flare in desperation made her wet each and every time.
“You know what I love about your human skin?”
"Hmm?" Your thoughts were clouded, making it difficult to speak, and Shuri chuckled softly underneath you.
“I love that I can mark you up. Claim you as mine. As a vampire, you would just heal. Is that what you want?”
You didn’t reply, but simply gazed down at her beautiful curls settled between your thick thighs but Shuri was not pleased, and the way she lightly slapped your pussy over the fabric of your panties proved that.
“Oh,” you stuttered softly to her delicious touch.
“I asked you princess, is that what you want?”
“N-no.”
“Hmmm…that’s what I thought.”
Shuri planted several affectionate kisses on your clit, the final tender gesture before you received what you had been yearning for; the exquisite and familiar sting of Shuri’s fangs piercing your skin only this time, her head was buried between your left thigh, marking her territory with her fangs as she drank the crimson lifesource. The sensation was exhilarating, a familiar mixture of pleasure and pain, the boundaries between the sensations melding into a blurred ecstasy.
“Shuri,” you moaned out, overwhelming her sanity. She quickly detached from you, sending her love in equal measure to your opposite inner thigh, pushing your panties to the side to make room for her fingers to settle beautifully inside you.
“Hold this here,” she demanded, wanting your own fingers to hook the fabric to the side so she could focus on tending to your mind and body. And you complied, holding your panties in place before you felt her sink two fingers into you.
“Unh,” you softly whimpered, spreading your legs to the best of your ability to give your girlfriend more room to continue her work, the duality of her drawing blood from your inner thigh as she pumped into your thumping pussy walls had your heels digging into her back, your own back drawn into a soft arch as you worked her face.
“There’s my girl.”
Her persistent fingers continued their relentless nudging against your sensitive spot. She was cautious not to draw too much blood from you. As you neared climax, she withdrew, returning to meet your face now adorned with a pout, eyes brimming with an eternal longing for her to bring you to completion.
"I was almost there," you complained, your eyebrows softening along with Shuri's, before she swiftly positioned your body to press against hers, your back against her front as your reflections stared back through the vanity mirror. Her lips were stained in a deep red hue and the irises of her eyes matched the tone. It was an image that should have frightened you but it was your favorite look on her, Shuri in her true nature; predator and prey in its most sensual form.
“I know you were, but you know the rules. You cum when I let you cum, understood?”
You nod quickly.
“Good girl.”
Shuri grabs your breasts, kneading them as she kisses the crevice between your shoulder and your throat.
“Shuri…baby…m-more. I need more.”
And with your words, one of her hands travels upwards towards your throat as the other roams south, pushing her fingers beneath your now soaked panties as she skimmed your delicate clit, circling the bud before she dips her fingers into you with the goal to finish what she started.
“You know what else I love about your human body?”
“Hm? Wh-what’s that?”
“Your human breath and how easy it is to just…cut it off.” Her hand clasped your throat firmly, not hard enough to hurt you, but hard enough to make you feel lightheaded. “Can’t do this if you don’t breathe. And I know how much me choking you gets you wet, nkosazana, do you really want that gone?”
You squirmed briefly while she maintained her grip. You looked so beautiful in your helpless state and not once did her fingers relent their persistent and calculated strokes inside you, paying close attention to the way your pussy walls responded to her presence. She had one hand beneath your panties, the other around your neck, pulling constricted whimpers from you as you struggled for air. Your little sounds got to her, and she let you go.
“Aww, you’re ok. You’re gonna let me do it again, right?”
“Yes please, choke me again, Shuri. Please. I’m so close.”
And she does, because why would she deny her love? She clasps your throat once more, your hips canting along with her thrusts, running towards your sweet, sweet release.
“That’s it, baby. Let all your frustrations out. Good girl, let it all out.”
“Sh-Shuri…,” you choked out, pouting at the way you felt your walls tighten in pleasure around your girlfriend’s determined fingers. Shuri releases you, listening to your intake of air before she gently caresses the side of your throat. Her eyes locked with your reflection in the mirror, bracing you for what's to come. She took hold of your throat again, tilting your jaw to the side to expose the same spot she had fed from the first time. The familiar mix of slight pain and intoxicating pleasure surged through you, heightening the sensation of your impending orgasm and hearing Shuri’s soft moans of satisfaction as she drank from you only deepened your bliss. Not once did her fingers halt, her palm grazing your sensitive clit drew you nearer to the end until you let out a high pitched moan that made Shuri’s pussy clench in ache.
“Unh…Shuri, Shuri…yes! Fuck!”
She took one final taste before reluctantly pulling away, but not without struggle. Your blood was like fuel to her, and once she got a taste, it was a challenge to let go and although it should frighten you, it didn’t. Turning to face her, you met her gaze with your drowsy eyes, falling into the depths of her bloodshot irises. She looked unsettlingly beautiful, and in that moment, you realized how much you missed this, how deeply you needed it. The smirk on her blood-stained lips spoke volumes of how much she felt the same.
“You always do so good for me, princess,” she spoke with softness, slipping her cum-coated fingers between your lips as you sucked the remnants of your release off of her. You let go with a wet pop, batting your eyelashes at her before you spoke.
“I love you so much, baby.”
“I love you more.”
As soon as you both finish cleaning and tending to one another, you slip back into a deep sleep, resuming the dream where you left off a few months ago, with the woman in your arms, the one you now know to be named Adanna.
➳ the dream:
The dream setting is the same as before, with Shuri allowing you to experience everything from her perspective, as if you were living it yourself. Once again, Adanna is in your arms, pleading for you to turn her.
“I want you to do it, Shuri. Turn me. Please. I want this.” Her dark brown eyes shimmered with a perfect blend of desperation and love. You were terrified, afraid of crossing your boundaries once more, but the thought of not being with her forever frightened you even more.
"Please," she pleaded one final time before you pressed your lips to hers, savoring the warmth of her human essence before trailing down to her throat, delicately grazing your mouth across her skin and her pulse whispered against your lips. Opening your mouth, you descended, piercing her veins with your teeth and you moaned as her life source flowed into your mouth, embracing the flavor you desperately needed. As you continue to drink from her, your struggle to detach your lips from her throat grows more and more and Adanna becomes frightened, soon coming to realize that she had underestimated your thirst.
“Shuri,” she softly pleads, her mind growing fuzzy as she feels life slowly drift from her. “Shuri, please…you’re hurting me.”
You tried to fight it, but you were lost, intoxicated by the blood as you sank your teeth deeper into the one you loved. Drinking from her was unlike anything else; hunger, love, and lust blurred together and you could not decipher which was which. Her blood brought you the closest you'd ever felt to heaven, your senses heightened and explosive. Yet, in that overwhelming euphoria, you couldn't feel or hear her struggling beneath you, death latching closer and closer to her.
“Shuri…Shuri…it’s too much!”
You thought you could do it, bring her to the brink of death and then feed her your blood to restore her but you could not stop.
“I love you…need you so bad,” you mumbled against her, feeling her lifesource flow through your dead body made you feel more alive than you ever felt.
"SHURI!" she screamed one final time before you felt an enormous impact that sent you flying, landing on your feet as if you were a superhero. He came out of nowhere, a tall man who stood before both you and a dying Adanna. In that moment, you realized the gravity of your actions. You had crossed a line you never intended to, and now the consequences were clear: Adanna, helpless and nearly lifeless, was pleading for the man to save her and take her away from you. It broke your heart to see her so terrified of you.
“A-Adanna??”
"St-stay aw-ay from... me," she said with weakness, gasping as death knocked at her front door. You wanted to help her, to save her, but as you moved towards her, the mysterious man dashed in front of you with a speed that startled even you, revealing his vampire nature. It was evident he had been around for a long time, the first vampire you'd encountered since your maker left you many years ago.
“Let me help her!” You yelled in terror, attempting to fight the much stronger man.
“No,” the man gently stated, as if you were not weeping in fear as the love of your life lay dying as a result of your inability to control yourself. “You will kill her.”
“No…I can do this! Let me go! Let me help her!”
“You have yet to master the art of control. You cannot do this or you will kill her.”
“And she will most certainly die if you do not get your hands off me and let me help her!” You were in a state of panic, more frightened than you ever thought possible, and your heightened vampire senses only intensified your fear and anger.
“Stay a-way…don’t touch m-me…”
“Do you hear that? She does not want you to help her…perhaps it would be better if you let me handle this. Let me take care of her. Let me rid you of the burden of having to turn her yourself and you can be free.”
At that moment, his words made sense. You felt like a burden, and the scent of Adanna’s blood still lingered within you, making you afraid of what you were capable of.
"Let me handle this," he assured once more. It took you a moment, but Adanna was dying, losing blood by the second. With every drop that hit the ground, it became harder for you to resist the urge to go and drink it, to savor her last moments as she slipped away.
"Leave." It was a command, not a suggestion. You took in the sight of her one last time before you ran, seizing this final chance before you lost all control, leaving Adanna and the man behind. That was the last moment you saw her, the last time you held her weak body as you struggled with your instincts. In that moment, you lost all hope. You were doomed, cursed to a life of loneliness. Everything you touched, you destroyed. Everyone you loved died by your hands and you wanted no part of it. You ran and never looked back, fleeing into endless darkness until you finally woke up.
You woke up to darkness, realizing how much you had adapted to Shuri's lifestyle as you drifted off at sunrise. You sensed her presence beside you on the bed, your back turned to her. Taking a moment to process the dream she had shared with you, a window into her past, you turned around. There she was, sitting with her elbows resting on her propped-up knees, her head bowed in shame, struggling to meet your gaze, afraid you would never look at her the same way again. For a moment, you both sat in silence, the sound of your soft breath and the absence of hers filling the room as you pondered what had just witnessed.
“I thought I put that day behind me, but revealing it to you stirred up old memories I wish I had forgotten,” her trembling voice broke the silence. “It’s an indescribable feeling, the all encompassing, wretched, mind-shattering feeling of drinking from someone you love, especially if you are doing it in hopes of turning them.”
The silence settled like a weight in the room, each passing second stretching longer than the last.
“Feeling love as a vampire is much much much harder than any human love, I can assure you. Once you are turned, everything becomes magnified, including human feelings. Love as a human is already too much in itself, as a vampire it’s the most burdening feeling when you constantly crave their blood as well, not wanting to hurt them but wanting a taste…it’s overpowering.”
You sit up in front of her, taking her hands in yours for a gentle kiss.
“The guilt I felt was mind blowing, doing to her the exact same thing my maker did to me. I left her, and left her to him. I had no idea who he was or what his intentions were. I was not thinking clearly at that moment and to be fair, with all her blood rushing through me, there was no way I could think properly. I was out of my mind, high on her blood and thirsty for more.
“At first, I was not sure if she was turned or if she died, and I did not want to find out as both answers frightened me. But once I heard of all the killings that were happening in the city, I figured they were coming from her and I wanted so badly to intervene and help her, be a mentor but what kind of mentor would I be?? I could barely control myself, never mind a new vampire who was abandoned by who she thought was the love of her life. I did not intervene out of fear, and because of that, she is the monster she is now.”
“No…Shuri, you can’t put that on yourself.” And you meant it. How could she place such a burden on herself? “I understand that you feel a sense of obligation to fix her, or be there for her…whatever it is, but Shuri…baby look at me…who she is, is not because of you.”
A small grin graced her face, appreciative of your efforts but did not believe it.
“At the end of the day, Adanna is her own being. Everything she did was a choice she made on her own. And she can blame you or the world or whoever she wants but we are all responsible for our own actions. Life isn’t fair to anybody, but we have to deal with the cards we are dealt with, Shuri. You were abandoned too, baby…remember that.”
She smiled gently, resting her cheek against your cupped hand.
“I remember once she had this crazy idea on turning all the black people in the city of New York into vampires so we could collectively take over colonial powers. It was tempting.”
She chuckled and so did you.
“So…why New York?”
You take the pad of your thumb and gently caress the final tears that escape her.
“You could go anywhere in the world…why some random house just outside New York? You could’ve literally gone anywhere and you chose to be here…”
“I suppose when you hear of a city that never sleeps, that is alive during the night…well which vampire wouldn’t want to go there??”
“Fair point.” You feel a fierce urge to ask her the question, fearful that it might ignite jealousy inside you or resurrect old emotions within her.
“How did you meet her?”
Shuri rose her brow, unsure if this is really what you wanted to hear right now. “Are you sure you wanna hear about my past love life?”
“No, but I can’t help but be a little curious,” you respond with a gentle smile, pecking her plush lips with a kiss before she speaks.
“I went to a speakeasy one night, and she was there singing on the stage. She was so beautiful, singing with one of the most beautiful voices I have ever heard and I just could not let her go. That was my mistake, of course. She could have lived a long and fruitful life without me if I just stayed away.”
“Shuri…”
“I’m not a good person, y/n.”
“I don’t believe that. I believe your life was taken from you and you were learning to survive on your own. Everything was a first for you. Loving as a vampire was a first for you. Drinking your lover's blood was a first for you. Turning her, that was your first time. You had no idea what you were getting yourself into. You made mistakes. Big mistakes? Yeah. You fucked up, Shuri. But name me one person who hasn’t.”
“You need to stop doing that.”
“Doing what?”
“Painting me like this pure person, I’m anything but. I’ve done some terrible things, y/n.”
“And we can talk about that later, but I see what you’re trying to do here. You’re trying to scare me away, make me change my mind and it’s not working. I know what I want. I wanna be with you. Forever”
“Uh uh. Not good enough. No way I’m turning you because you love me. What happens if it doesn’t work out for us down the road? And now you’re stuck as a vampire forever. What then?”
“That’s not gonna happen.”
“We don’t know that, y/n. And I’m not saying this because I doubt your love for me or vice versa, I’m saying this because I’ve been around long enough to see how the world works. How people change. How life and circumstances change people.”
“So then what do you want me to say, Shuri?”
“Give me a reason. A real reason as to why you want this and then I can make a decision from there.”
You pause, weighing your many reasons before you speak.
“Ok. How about this…I have nothing to live for. I have no money except my parents' money, and they cut me off. No siblings. No friends. No future.”
“And you want this to be your future?? To live with an everlasting urge to hunt and kill…”
“I’ll choose not to kill.”
“It is not that simple, y/n.”
“Maybe not. But the difference between me and you is you had nobody to teach you. No guidance. No mentor. But I’ll have you. You’ll teach me to be good, I know you will. I trust you, Shuri.”
“Bast…you’re driving me insane.”
“Come on, my love…what are you waiting for?? Don’t you want to be with me…forever?”
“Fuck. Of course I want that. More than anything in the world.”
“Then what’s stopping you??”
“It did not end well for me the last time.”
“It won’t be like that. You can stop.”
“We don’t know that.”
“Maybe not, but I trust you. If you can stop while you’re fucking me then you can stop while turning me.”
“It’s not the same.”
“Shuri, pleaassee. Bring me to my final breath, and then give it back to me. I’ll be strong and free…just like you. I won’t be this fragile, weak thing that you have to worry about all the time. I’ll be able to fend for myself and I won’t be a burden to you anymore.”
“You’re not a burden to me.”
“But I am. Even if you don’t see it. I slow you down, babe.”
Her gaze narrowed, brows furrowing slightly as they peered into the distance, lost in contemplation.
“Plus, I don’t want to grow old while you stay young. It’ll look weird on my part.”
You both laugh and she shakes her head in sympathetic disbelief.
“Soooo is that a yes?”
“Most definitely not a yes.”
“Is it a ‘maybe’?”
“Hmmm…maybe.”
“Well that’s not a ‘no’.”
“I guess it’s not.”
“So we’re getting somewhere??”
She refused to acknowledge it, to admit how you were pulling at the strings of her undead heart. She had never felt so desired, so wanted in her life, not even by Adanna, and it was driving her to madness. She longed for you in every way imaginable, wishing it didn't have to be this way, replacing your breath with one that hungered for blood above all else. Yet, Shuri was always selfish, never one to deny herself what she desired. So, for a fleeting moment, her heart and mind softened, indulging in the realm of possibilities.
“Yes princess…we are getting somewhere.”
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
Several days had passed since the incident, spent in peaceful solitude with Shuri. One evening, you chose to rise a little earlier to catch the sunset. Despite having largely adapted to Shuri’s lifestyle, you remained human, with an innate need for sunlight and its comforting warmth.
You sat on the shore, watching the sunset painting the sky as the day gently faded away. Pastel hues glistened before your eyes, sparking a feeling of wonder and awe. It was a moment for contemplation, a brief respite from life's chaos where time appeared to stand still. As a vampire, you understood you would never have this experience again, and a part of you found solace in that. You were willing to relinquish these small, inherently human moments if it meant freedom from the limitations that came with being one.
Even after the sun fully set, you sat outside for another hour or so, enjoying your own company. You looked back at Shuri's house, finding her silhouette beaming through the window and knowing she was there drew comfort.
“I love you, y/n,” she said to you through her mind, and you smiled, impatient for the day you could telepathically say it back to her.
“I love you, Shuri,” speaking as if she was right next to you but you knew her vampire ears picked it up with ease.
“I love you.” Another voice entered your mind, a mocking one, and it left you utterly confused. It didn’t sound like Shuri’s voice, but who else could it be?
“Did you say something?,” you asked, hoping Shuri would hear you again.
“I did not,” she replied to your mind. “Why do you ask, s’thandwa?”
“Oh nothing…I just thought I heard something.”
“No baby, I said nothing,” she assured once again.
You continue to savor your moment with yourself when an unfamiliar rustling in the trees catches your attention. Startled, you glance around but see nothing. You looked at the window and Shuri wasn’t there anymore. The rustling sounds again.
"Shuri? Shuri, this isn't funny." You knew your girlfriend loved to play games and tease you whenever she had the chance, but now she was nowhere to be found. "Shuri??"
A gust of wind struck your back, accompanied by a dark presence looming over you, forcing goosebumps to rise on your skin.
“You’re still as beautiful as ever.”
Your heart thudded erratically in your chest, a frantic drumroll that seemed to echo through your entire body. It pounded with such intensity that you could feel it in your throat. That all-too-familiar voice that swept through your mind, bringing back memories of darkness and unhappiness, left you in sheer terror. It was impossible. How could this be? But as soon as you doubted, the feeling vanished, replaced by the unmistakable sensation of rough, clammy hands skimming your shoulders, making your body shudder in fear.
“Turn around my love. Let me see your pretty face,” he whispered into your ear and you complied, coming face to face with him; the man you hated beyond the hatred you’ve ever felt for anyone.
Jonathan.
Only now his face seemed harsher and more sinister; his eyes glowed a vivid, unsettling red, like twin embers burning with insatiable hunger. Your first instinct was to run, but you knew better. There was no way a human could outrun a vampire. So, you stood frozen in your spot as he extended his fangs.
“You’re probably wondering where Shuri is, right? Why hasn’t she come to your rescue…?? She’s rather…occupied at the moment with her first love. Who gave me permission to kill you if Shuri even dares to come save you.”
You say nothing.
“But that’s the problem, y/n. I don’t want to kill you…I just want you.”
He reaches out to graze your face, and you dodge his touch; something you never would have dared to do when you were with him, fearing his reaction. But now, you are filled with anger with no outlet. How dare Shuri lie to you again? You felt manipulated and used, as if she had deceived you to win you over, treating you like a pawn in her own little vampire game.
Jonathan cocks his head at the action, shocked at how you so easily avoided his touch.
“I see your time with your little dyke has made you forget your manners.”
“Go to hell.”
He smirked so deviously, like the human Jonathan you used to pretend to love but even now, you could feel how becoming a vampire has heightened the terrible person he already was even before his transformation.
“I’m going to find Shuri,” but as you walked away, his vampire speed blocked you once again in a millisecond and your heartbeat quickened.
“Get out of my way,” you whisper in malice, your eyes buried into his scarlet ones as you pretend to not be afraid. But as soon as he gripped your arm with sheer vampire force, one that could have snapped your bone if he had gripped any harder, you yelled.
“Let go of me!”
“I swear to god, if he hurts you, I’ll rip him to fucking pieces!,” she spoke to your mind, and even though you could not directly hear her words, her fear for you was still utterly discernible. But that moment of ease washed away as soon as you and Jonathan both heard intense crashing and banging coming from inside the house; sounds that made you fear for Shuri’s immortal life.
“Shuri!!”
“Hold on baby, I’m coming for you.”
Shuri burst through the door with Adanna right behind her, the two of them locked in a vicious physical fight as they sped toward you with such velocity, it seemed as though they were floating rather than running. Both bore scars on their faces and bodies, healing rapidly, but you hardly noticed in the midst of their chaos. Before you could comprehend what was happening, Shuri lunged toward Jonathan with nothing but the intention to destroy him. With her years of experience, she could easily overpower him—but Adanna intercepted her, stepping between the two of them. Shuri tried to push past, but Adanna had grown stronger over the years. The entire scene was terrifying, three sets of eyes glowing and fangs bared.
Shuri is consumed by rage, too blinded by her fury to notice little ol’ you trembling in the corner. Her only focus is tearing Jonathan apart. The three vampires clash violently, with Shuri's power overwhelming Jonathan, who looks bewildered as he struggles to defend himself. Adanna, nearly as strong as Shuri, fights fiercely to protect him, their movements a blur of speed and raw strength.
You stood frozen in terror, your fear for Shuri's safety overwhelming you more than anything. Desperate, you screamed her name, and in an instant, the chaos ceased. All three pairs of eyes turned toward you, but only Shuri truly felt the depth of your fear. Her anger immediately drained from her, and her blood-red eyes faded back to their dark brown, her fangs retracting as she softened. She ran toward you, but as she drew closer, you instinctively backed away. Jonathan made a move to follow, but Adanna held him back, her curiosity piqued by what was about to unfold.
Shuri's heart broke at the subtle gesture of you backing away from her. You were just as terrified of her now as you had been when she first revealed her true nature, and she could sense it. The pain in her eyes was unmistakable, and in that moment, she realized how deeply the fear had taken root.
“Y/n? B-baby what’s wrong?”
“You lied to me,” you whispered to yourself, but of course her ears heard you perfectly. You looked so small and helpless, curling into yourself.
“What?? Baby, no. I didn’t lie to you. I’m just as shocked as you are.”
"Stop lying!" you screamed, your voice trembling as you felt yourself losing control. Shuri's face was etched with shock, while Adanna looked on with a knowing smirk. “All you have done since the moment we met was a lie!”
“No! No nkoszana, I’m telling the truth!”
Shuri reached out to touch you, but Jonathan moved to hold her back. In an instant, Shuri had him in a chokehold, a position where she could decapitate him easily if she wished. Adanna mirrored her actions with you, gripping you firmly. She clicked her tongue and waved her finger in a silent gesture of warning.
“Let her go, or I’ll kill him!”
“You first.” Adanna tightened her grip on you, applying more pressure to intimidate Shuri, causing you pain. You whimpered in her hold, pleading for her to let go.
“Adanna…”
“Let. Him. Go.”
“What do you want, huh? Why have you come back? After all these years, why are you here tormenting me?”
Adanna smirked, then roughly tossed you to the ground, the impact nearly knocking the wind out of you. As you struggled to catch your breath, Shuri kept a firm grip on Jonathan, who looked terrified for his life. Slowly, Adanna approached him, her eyes cold as she scanned the fear etched across his face.
“I turned him.”
Shuri stood silent in confusion.
“I saw you that day, you took him out here in the middle of nowhere thinking you were safe. I saw you drain the life out of him, but you didn’t actually kill him…and there was your mistake. You left him for dead, had you drank anymore from him, he would have died. But you didn’t. You just…left him there. To wither away with his thoughts, ran away from the crime scene you invented and I came in…and saved him.”
“A quick death would have been too easy for him. He deserved to suffer.”
“Why? Because of how he treated her??,” she says in disgust. “What makes her more deserving than me??”
“So this is what it is about?? Revenge?? I know I hurt you Adanna and that is something I have to live with for the end of time but your anger will not change the situation!”
“Maybe not…but it will make me feel better.”
Adanna moved with terrifying precision, driving a thick stick into your side with a swift, calculated thrust. The pain was searing, a torment that seemed to stretch on endlessly, enough to potentially kill you slowly, but not immediately. The world around you twisted into a blur as the pain took hold of you.
You remembered Shuri’s anguished reaction, even through the haze of your suffering. She let go of Jonathan immediately, racing to your side with a desperate urgency. Jonathan, unable to resist the overwhelming scent of your blood, stumbled after you but Shuri anticipated his move, intercepted him by driving a thick stick into him with equal force. Although it didn't pierce his heart, it was enough to weaken him drastically, sending him sprawling to the ground; his new vampire strength unable to withstand the attack.
Your memories were fragmented and disjointed; fleeting images of Shuri crying out for help as she held your limp body in her arms, the echo of chaotic footsteps in the hallways, and blinding flashes of light as everything around you dissolved into a painful blur.
“What was the incident??”
“I-I don’t know, she just…” Shuri's panicked cries fade into the background as you struggle to cling to life.
“Send her to the E.R.!”
"Stay alive, my love. Please don’t make me turn you this way," her voice echoed in your mind, compelling you to fight to stay alive. You struggled until everything around you went silent, enveloping you in a deep, profound slumber that brought you into a dreamlike state. You found yourself free, transcending the limits of your mortal existence. You were powerful and flawless, feeling an exhilarating strength that made you believe you could conquer anything. The world outside was cloaked in darkness, but you felt no fear. Instead, you felt invincible, where every shadow and obstacle seemed insignificant against your newfound strength. Your senses were heightened; the night air was crisp and alive with possibilities, and you reveled in the freedom and dominance that being reborn gifted you.
You drifted. And drifted. And drifted. Into an inevitable nothingness; claiming you for what seemed like an eternity.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
You had been confined to bed for a while, the painkillers draping you in a shroud of sleep. Gradually, consciousness nudged at you, and you fought to pry your eyes open against the blinding whiteness of hospital lights. As your surroundings started to come into focus, a sharp gasp escaped you, accompanied by a stabbing pain in your side; lingering reminders of your wounds. A gentle breeze brushed past, and you turned to see Shuri swiftly by your side of the hospital bed. Her presence was peace to your weary soul, her eyes filled with relief and affection, warming you even as your mind struggled to fully awaken.
“A-am I a vampire now?,” were your first words as you fought the effects of the heavy medications.
Shuri chuckles, tears rolling down her eyes as she plants the firmest kiss to your forehead. “Nurse! She’s awake!”
“Shuri…what happened??”
“It’s okay baby…you’re ok now, you are going to be ok. I love you so much, do you know that? Please say you know that…”
In a fleeting instant, the memories surged back, crashing over you like a tidal wave. The faces of Jonathan and Adanna flickered in your mind, their actions replaying with a vividness that made your breath catch. You could almost feel the crushing weight of terror that overcame you, the harrowing brush with death that had nearly consumed you. It was as if you were reliving the torment all over again as you struggled to grasp the reality around you. The emotional sting is almost as painful as the physical one, as though it might pull you under once more.
“Why didn’t you turn me?”
Shuri stayed quiet, her brows knitting together in a wordless expression.
“Let’s talk later princess…the nurse should be here shortly.”
After a series of tests and a checkup, you were finally cleared to leave. As you settled into the wheelchair and were brought to the car, you noticed a stain of dried blood on the passenger's seat, a haunting reminder of that day’s events. The car ride home was quiet, tension thick in the air but the moment you arrived, Shuri used her vampire speed to grab the wheelchair and bring it to you before you could even open the door.
“I don’t need that,” you scoffed.
“S’thandwa, do not be stupid. Sit in the chair.”
“No, I’m not a cripple. I can do this myself.”
“Y/n…”
“I said no.”
There’s a brief pause before she smirks, then suddenly scoops you up, cradling you in her arms as if you weighed nothing. You let out a startled yelp as she lifts you effortlessly.
“You want to be stubborn? Fine, be that way.”
A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips, one you tried to suppress, hoping she wouldn’t notice. But, of course, she did. Nothing ever slipped past her.
As you entered the room, she carefully laid you down on the bed, her touch gentle and reassuring. She leaned in, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead before settling beside you. Silence shook the room once more, but your mind was anything but quiet. Thoughts swirled in an endless stream, each one begging for attention, leaving you unsure of where to even begin unraveling them.
“I’m so so so sorry, y/n,” Shuri mutters. “I should have never brought you into this. This was my fault. And now they are both out there, bast knows where, most likely scheming against me which most likely involves hurting you because she hates how much you mean to me.”
You remain silent, letting it all sink in. A lone tear slips down your cheek, soaking into the fabric of the pillow beneath you.
“So why didn’t you turn me then?” Your voice was broken and bruised, beaten by what seemed like Shuri’s innate fear to make her like you. She turns around to face you, but your gaze remains on the empty ceiling. “It was the perfect opportunity. You could have just let me bleed out a little longer, pull me to the brink of death and then turn me.”
“Because that is what she wanted, princess. She wanted me to turn you in hopes that I would have the same fate with you as I did with her.”
“So what? Does she want you back or something? What does she want from me?”
“She wants revenge. She hates to see me happy after what I had done to her. She cannot fathom me being with the person I love while she rots in anger.”
You scoff, wiping the tears from your eyes. “Well she’s dumb and needs to get a hobby.”
Shuri softly chuckles before speaking. “I also did not turn you because that’s not how I wanted it to happen.”
“What?”
“If I would have turned you right then and there, it would not have been because that was your choice. It would have been because of unfortunate circumstances and that is not fair to you. When I turn you, I atleast owe you that luxury I was never given.”
You struggled to process the words spilling from her mouth, disbelief tightening in your chest. Slowly, you turned to face her, your movements deliberate as you drew in a few deep breaths, trying to steady the ache building within you.
“Shuri…?” You had to make sure you were hearing correctly.
“This was never my intention, to let it get to this point. You were beautiful, and I was simply tired of being alone, and I selfishly took it upon myself to weave myself into your life and now we are here. I guess it was bound to happen.”
“Shuri, what are you saying??”
For a moment, she lay there, caught in the disbelief of the words she was about to speak, as if hesitating to give them life. She reaches out to caress your cheek, eyes locking in an instant and her gaze softened before she said the words you craved since the moment you truly knew her.
“You leave me no choice, my beautiful princess, but to turn you.”
A wave of beautiful relief washed over you, lifting the weight that had burdened your heart for so long. You felt as light as a cloud, as if, for the first time, everything might actually be okay. Shuri pulled you close, your face nestled against her chest as silent sobs shook your body. She understood immediately that these weren’t tears of sadness, nor were they tears of joy. They were tears of overwhelming relief.
Life had not been kind to you. People had walked all over you, leaving you feeling small, helpless, incapable of standing on your own. But Shuri was different. She made you feel like you were worth something, like you were worth fighting for. All you had ever wanted was to be free; nothing more, nothing less. And Shuri knew this. She felt it in the way your tears soaked into her shirt, as if the warmth of your need could breathe life into her dead beat heart. You needed this. You needed her. And she needed you too.
“I know baby…I know. I’m so sorry.”
You sobbed into her, inhaling her comforting scent into you, the scent you wished to breathe in for the rest of eternity.
“I’m so sorry I made it so hard for you to convince me. It’s not that I did not want to be with you forever…I was just so afraid.”
You lifted your face up to hers, her beautiful tear stained face locked in yours.
“I know, Shuri. It’s ok. I understand you.”
This was all you needed: a moment of comfort so profound that it felt as though it could last forever. And you yearned for it to be timeless, untethered by the fleeting time of your human days, existing beyond the limits of mortal time.
Weeks went by, and with each passing day, you grew stronger, your body healing and regaining its strength. Through it all, Shuri stayed by your side, every step of the way. She encouraged you to savor the human experience for as long as you could, and you agreed, finding joy in the small, everyday moments before they slipped away. Life felt more peaceful than it had in a long time, and Shuri was every bit a part of it.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
“I’m ok now, love,” you giggled, as Shuri scooped you up in her arms.
“I know, I just get so worried about you.”
About 2 months have passed since the incident, and you were feeling much better. Here you were, in Shuri’s arms as she carried you to the bedroom like a princess. Your human lungs still drew in breath, and your heart continued to beat as you waited patiently for Shuri to fully bring you into her world.
When you both lied on the bed, you got the urge to try something. You straddled her, startling her as you took her mouth into yours. It had been so long since you had her, and you knew she resisted out of fear in hurting you but you missed her. Missed her touch and missed the way she made your body feel. But Shuri quickly detached from your lips and you whimpered at the hurtful act.
“No. Not yet. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Please…please just let me,” you pleaded in desperation.
“I said no”
“Why?? Stop acting like I’m easily shattered. We used to fuck so good and everyday I go without touching you…tasting you…I literally lose my mind. I know you’re afraid and seeing me like how I was when I was hurt probably scarred you but I am not a child. I can take care of myself and right now…I want you. All of you. I miss you. I miss your gorgeous, sexy body and I miss feeling you inside me.”
She raised a brow.
“Don’t you miss me?”
She gazed intently into your soft eyes and your pouting lips, shaking her head with a playful sigh. She leaned her forehead into yours before she spoke.
“More than anything, my love.”
“Then what are you waiting for??”
Shuri hesitated, but her feelings of love and desire burned even stronger, overwhelming her uncertainty.
“Just this one time.”
“Just this one time,” you repeated. Your lips met slowly at first, the hesitation giving way to a rush of heat. She gripped the back of your neck to pull her closer, deepening the kiss until it felt like you two were breathing the same air. The world around you fell away, as you rekindled that fire that had not been burned in so long.
It did not take long for clothing to start coming off, shirts being removed first from the both of you as you lay on top of her. You pull her pants off so she’s in her undergarments only, slotting your knee between her pretty thighs until it comes in contact with her pussy that was pounding with a rush of pleasure. In no time, she begins to whimper, rubbing herself against you as your parted mouth swallows her moans. She looked so beautiful like this, caught in a desperate longing for more of you and no matter how hard she tried, she could never resist you.
“S-s’thandwa,” she stuttered, clearly nearing her peak as her movements grew more frantic. But you pulled yourself away from her, a sly smirk spreading across your face as you pushed her closer to the edge of madness.
“Want you to finish inside me,” you coaxed, whimpers caught in the back of your throat as you felt the warmth between your thighs flutter in ache. And that was all the confirmation she needed. She flipped you around with her vampire speed, testing the waters to see if you were ok and you were. She smiles and kisses your nose before she goes down to your mouth which quickly becomes the valley between your breasts before she wraps her mouth equally around each sensitive nipple.
“Please.” You struggled to hold back the subtle urge to beg, but being deprived of her touch for so long made your body impatient, eager to know what she had planned to do with it.
“Are we begging already, nkosazana?,” she teased with that amused expression that always had your heart pounding and it made you so embarrassed because you just knew she could hear it. You shook your head in challenge, trying to calm your whines but as soon as you felt her remove your bottoms, all the thin patience withered away. She kissed your inner thighs, plush lips meeting the scars she left from that day she marked you there and your chest was heaving.
“You should see how fucking wet you are right now…all because you need my touch that bad?”
“B-baby…please.”
“Use that mouth you love to run so much, princess. Tell me what you want.”
She inhaled your scent before planting soft kisses to the swell of your clit and your body trembled at the touch. But you knew she was not going any further until you spoke.
“Need you, baby…I want you inside me…please.”
“That’s a good girl. My needy little princess.” You nodded, because that is exactly who you were.
Your girlfriend smiles at you, her eyes dancing as they meet your desperate gaze. Shuri rose to her feet, abs all on display before removing her boxers and reaching for the vibranium toy she adored using on you. Shuri wasted no time, her eagerness clear as she longed to stretch your tight pussy walls. She grabs hold of your jaw, pressing her lips firmly against yours with sincere passion before she holds her shaft and pushes it into your leaking hole, your pulsing walls welcoming her in with ease while you both let out the filthiest moans into each other's mouths.
“I missed you, I missed you and your pussy so fucking much,” she whispered, her pace quickening as your cries grew louder. Your body shuddered violently against hers, overwhelmed by the intensity of her gaze, which made you squirm beneath her. Shuri's love for you was overbearing, and you felt the same for her. You longed for this moment to last forever. She dreamed of the days where she no longer had to be a vampire's gentle touch when having her sexual way with you, imagining how wonderful sex would be when she could fully express her body’s need for yours without the fear of breaking you.
“Just wait until I turn you, nkosazana. I will fuck you so good without destroying you.”
“You could do it now,” you playfully replied through your heavy panting. “F-fuck me like a true vampire right now…I d-don’t care if you b-break me.”
“You are fucking crazy, s’thandwa sam.”
“You love it though.”
“Yeah…yes I do, baby.”
You could only whimper in response, your eyes glistening with want and desire as she continued to push into you. It didn’t take long for you to reach your first orgasm. Or your second. Or even your third. You missed her deeply, and your pussy ached for her even more. Yet Shuri didn't pause, her thrusting never haltered because she knew that her favorite part was a few strokes away. She relished in overstimulating you, watching as your body quivered, breasts bouncing as you struggled to be good for her. And your girlfriend could always tell when you were; the way your eyes would go glossy, your lips pouting as you breathing picked up, grappling to put coherent words together. And you did it all for her. That was what she cherished most…the way you fought against the overwhelming pleasuree because of your love for her.
A tear escaped your eye and Shuri brushed it away with the pad of her thumb.
“Awww, my poor baby. Look at you…you're so helpless.”
“Sh-Shuri…”
“Yes?”
“W-want your c-cum inside me. P-please. Unh.”
“I’m right behind you s’thandwa, do not w-worry.”
She kept going, not too fast because she knew you were overstimulated, but enough to allow you to maintain it and bring you both to the finish line. Your orgasm washed over you like tidal waves do, an intense surge of pleasure that left you both breathless and disoriented. Every nerve in your body seemed to ignite, it was an explosion from within that had nowhere to land and your mind could only think of one thing: how you desired this, desired her more than you ever wanted anything else in your entire being. You could not wait any longer. Not another week, or day, or even another hour. You needed this, now and infinitely.
“I want you,” you whispered with big, doe eyes. Your voice trembled as tears clung to your dark, damp lashes streaked with the evidence of your longing. She put her fingers in her mouth, salivating those dangerous fingers of hers before bringing them down your body to circle your puffy clit and your body jerked up. Oh, how she loved to see you like this.
“Mhmm, keep going.”
“I want you forever, Sh-Shuri. Right here. Right now.”
She wore a look of confusion, her brows furrowing as she continued to rub you. She was right here with you and had no intention of leaving, but you proceeded with your unfinished statement.
“Turn me, baby. Please. Today. Now.”
She said nothing, only looked down at your plump lips and your round breasts. You were so beautiful in her eyes, and she wanted all of you.
“Princess—“
“No…I mean it. I want you. F-fuck…I w-want to be a v-vampire…with you. Oh.”
“You don’t know me.”
“But I do.”
“Who am I to you?” She slowed her movements on your clit, her strap still lingering inside you as she awaited your words. You whimpered one last time before you inhaled to speak.
“You are the most fucking selfish being I’ve ever met. You want what you want and you go after it. You get angry quickly and I know you live everyday fighting the urge to suck every ounce of blood inside of me and it scares me sometimes when I really think about it but I also know you’ll never hurt me. I know you’re hurt and I know you carry a lot of pain and anger inside of you, Shuri. And I know you try to hide it from me to protect me but your transparency only makes me want you more, no matter how dark your past is. I know you love me and I truly do believe that because I’ve never felt this before. I never felt so wanted and desired beyond what I look like on the outside. And maybe I’m just as selfish as you, because no matter how many people you’ve hurt or how many lives you’ve taken, you love me. And that’s all I care about. And now I just want to be with you for eternity.”
As the words fell from your lips, a wave of warmth surged through Shuri’s undead heart and she swears she felt it beat for a second. Each word and syllable echoed through her vampire mind, a mind that knew loneliness and despair like no other but in came you, the light at the end of the tunnel and she swears she could die from how much she loved you.
"Turn me," you repeated one last time, your voice carrying a soft insistence rather than a question. You caught a fleeting change in the color of Shuri's eyes, though she quickly masked it but you definitely noticed the subtle shift.
She returns her love to your clit, pulling you into your final human orgasm before she pulls out of you and you leak everywhere.
“I love you so so so much, y/n. More than anything in the world. More than I ever loved anyone before and I did not think I was capable of loving harder than I already have, but you, my most perfect girl, have proved me wrong.”
“I know Shuri…I know.” And you believed it.
“And you’re sure you want this? You want it right now? There is no turning back. This is permanent. This is for as long as eternity lasts for us. I don’t think you think you quite understand the meaning of immortality. ”
“And I never will if you don’t give it to me.” You reached up to cup her face, taking her in as you actively appreciated the pain of your beating heart. You could sense that these would be the last moments you could feel the patter against your ribcage, feel the breath entering your lungs, and the last moment you would feel at a human level before your emotions exploded like any immortal would.
Shuri removes her strap, so there’s nothing between your two beautiful dark naked bodies, holding you in her arms as a tear caresses her cheek.
“What’s wrong, my love?,” you questioned.
“Nothing is wrong…I’m just scared.”
“You have nothing to be afraid of. I believe in you. You can do this. You love me enough to stop.”
“But what if I don’t stop? I would not be able to live with myself…what if I hurt you??”
You gazed up at her with a look of sympathy, fully aware of how difficult this moment was for her but your belief in her remained unwavering. Gently, you drew her closer and pressed your lips to hers in a tender kiss before speaking.
“Then I’ll die happily in the arms of the one I love.”
Shuri's grin widened as she drew you in for one last, fervent kiss; a final, passionate exchange between human and vampire. This was the last moment you shared as a mere mortal before her fangs emerged, her irises shifting to the deepest red you had ever seen and you smiled at what was to come.
She leaned her head into the curve of your throat, pressing a soft kiss there before positioning her fangs above your artery, which seemed destined for her bite. Then, you felt it; her fangs piercing your skin with a depth that was unfamiliar and excruciating. Her bite wasn’t the bite of sexual pleasure or even to satiate her thirst; this was a transformative pain, a profound shift as she began to mold you into something like her.
You clung to her curls, tilting your head back to embrace the searing pain and the sensation of your life ebbing away with every second. Shuri reveled in the intimacy of the moment, her moans vibrating against your throat as your blood flowed into her. As you approached the brink of nothingness, stars danced in your fading vision, and death almost seemed to beckon with open arms. Almost. For a moment, there was nothing. No sensation, no sight, just darkness as you drifted into unconsciousness.
But then, you tasted it: Shuri’s blood. It was rich with power and possibility, a final, potent essence that completed your transition. As your life slipped away, all that remained was the true void, the absolute nothingness as your life faded away from you.
A few moments had passed and Shuri began to worry.
“Y/n…? Y/n…can you hear me??”
But you remained silent. Your mind ceased to think, your lungs no longer drew in air, and your heart fell still. You were dead.
“Oh…oh fuck…no, no, no, no, no…Y/N!! Baby, can you hear me?? Do not joke with me right now…please wake up!”
You were still. Nothing. Lifeless.
Shuri broke down, sobbing uncontrollably, her hand pressed to her mouth in a desperate attempt to muffle the convulsive cries tearing through her throat. How could this be? She had done everything right this time. She was certain she hadn’t killed you; she had felt your heart faintly beating when she gave you her blood. What could have possibly gone wrong?
“I am so sorry, baby…I’m so sorry, I should have never come into your life! I SHOULD HAVE LEFT YOU ALONE!! I’m so sorry, so sorry, so so sorry!”
Her sobs turned into a furious outburst as she began to tear apart her house, shattering everything in her way while she wrestled with her own existence. Overwhelmed by guilt and despair, she felt she could never forgive herself for what had happened. Consumed by the conviction that life without you was meaningless, she was determined to end it all.
But…
Gradually, life began to draw you out of the void. Memories of your entire existence, from infancy to the present, surged before you in a torrent of vivid images, both the good and the bad. The light at the end of the tunnel grew nearer and nearer until, suddenly, it stopped. You were there. You were here. Your eyes flew open in panic, and the first thing that hit you like an excruciating ton of bricks was the one thing that made you understand what Shuri fought so hard to keep you away from, an overpowering wave of something you never knew but your body understood: the smell of blood. ❁ཻུ۪۪♡
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Twilight who????? If you actually read that whole thing, I love you so much omg! I hope you enjoyed and don’t forget to comment and share (why do I sound like a YouTuber), I absolutely love reading your comments! Thank you so so much again, for your patience, I know it was a long as wait and I hope it was worth it :)
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thebearer · 1 year ago
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hi e! back again with more carmy shit because i love the way you did my little blurb justice 🥰. i literally just envisioned sydney minding her own business and just recklessly placing carmy in the hot seat cause she knew his ass was gon get it 😂. i’m all in for more dom!carmy so i’d love to keep the idea going that his s/o works for/with/alongside him at the bear with a touch of her giving him her two cents? a little bit of sass to just remind who he’s dealing with 😩. maybe this time around he slipped up on something major (a birthday, anniversary, or something that overall was important to the reader and he put it off because in his mind the bear comes first). she’s been slowly driving him crazy with that silent treatment she’s been doing for the last few days and her less than a few syllabled words when he doesn’t remind her how irked he made her 😂; she’s not mad anymore just disappointed. and anyway basically in a prep for preordered to go’s on lunch rush he’s reading back orders to her and she completely writes him off. i can see him being like exactly how he when he’s not getting when he needs from his staff during a frenzy and flipping tf out. like you know when he repeats himself a second time as if you didn’t hear him the first he means it 😂. tysm in advance! please feel free to do whatever you’d like. i’m writing this at 6 in the morning so many ideas are coming into the fold. i hope you have a great day - 🥣.
ok i did sorta a different-ish take. same idea but i don't write the reader as a chef bc quite honestly i can't relate lmao i'm a horrendous cook lol. but silent treatment yes!! reader works at the bear but not a chef.
"Does anyone know where the extra napkins are? Mindy needs to be settin' tables." Carmen huffed, slamming the empty crate back in the back stock.
"That would be your missus' domain." Richie snickers, elbowing Fak lightly. "Guess you better go ask her, Cousin."
"Yeah? Fuck off. Thought it was your fuckin' job." Carmen grumbled, running a hand through his hair.
"Me? Fuck no, Cousin. You know who's job it is, c'mon." Richie grinned. "It's your wife, Carm. What? Scared to talk to your wife?"
Carmen sneered, huffing in annoyance, but the truth was... yes, he was a little scared. Especially with how furious you were at him. Carmen was a chronic over worker, barely taking time for himself. It was a constant fight between the two of you, one he'd gotten better at, but still struggled finding that balance. Which normally, you'd be more forgiving about.
Except it was your anniversary.
Carmen left you waiting at home, dressed up with a new lingerie set that he painfully didn't get to enjoy. By the time he got off, taking his time to clean the kitchen, prep for tomorrow's crowd, he looked at his phone and saw your texts and calls, his heart dropping.
You'd been giving him the cold shoulder since then, furious and hurt- or so he assumed, you wouldn't say anything.
Richie found the entire thing hilarious when Carmen told him. "You forgot your fuckin' anniversary? You jagoff, holy shit."
Carmen found it less than amusing. The tension in the restaurant was thick because of the two of you. Everyone teetering around you, but especially Carmen, he was more on edge now.
Pushing the door open to the office, Carmen ducked his head in, seeing you at his desk- your desk, technically, you used it more. "Hey, honey," Carmen's voice was soft, a sweet hum that had your spine straightening. He flinched lightly, stepping towards you. "D'you know where the extra napkins are?"
You didn't reply, simply typing on your laptop, editing a video for the social media page about the upcoming summer specials.
Carmen blinked, barking out your name in a much harsher than he meant to, but it seemed to work. Kinda. Your head whipped around, eyes in a burning glare when they met his, but your lips were still pressed together.
Carmen through his hands out in exasperation. "Are you bein' fuckin' serious with me?"
Richie made his way towards the table where Tina was doing prep, craning his neck to watch. Your lips twisted, glaring harshly at Carmen. Carmen huffed, a hand running over his forehead. "What do you want from me, huh? What? You're just never gonna speak to me again? I forgot, ok? I didn't mean to, I just fuckin' forgot! I was at work!"
You glared at him, feeling Richie's amused gaze from over Carmen's shoulder, the rest of the staff pretending to be busy to hear. "Shut the door." You snapped.
Carmen flinched, shocked. "What-"
"Shut the fuckin' door, now." You snapped, slamming your laptop, turning to face him. Carmen pressed the door shut, ignoring Richie's whines of "c'mon, Cousin, it was just gettin' good!".
The two of you stared, neither being the first to talk, not wanting to break. You huffed, rolling your eyes in annoyance. "You wanted to talk, talk, Carmen. I've got shit to do."
"Hey," Carmen's eyes flashed at you, his tone hard with an edge of warning. "You better watch your-"
"-No, you better watch your mouth with me. Watch what you say to me, Berzatto." You snapped, pointing a finger at him. "This isn't a fuckin' game, alright? I'm mad at you. Actually fuckin' mad at you."
Carmen's stomach turned, swallowing the guilt rising with the bile in his throat. "I... I'm sorry-"
"-Sorry isn't going to work this time, Carmen. It's always sorry. Always I didn't fuckin' mean to, I got busy." You snapped, arms wrapping over your torso. "You always do this, but our anniversary? You forgot our anniversary?"
"No, I didn't forget." Carmen ran a hand down his face. "I got you flowers and-and the bracelet-"
"-And that was very nice, Carmen, but you weren't there." You snapped, the finality in his tone making his rebuttal dissolve in his mouth. The hurt in your eyes, rounding and pitiful, soft and pleading with him. You were angry, but you were hurt, too.
His shoulders deflated, breath leaving his lungs. "You're right," Carmen nodded slowly. "No, you're-you're right, and-and-and I'm... Fuck, I'm so sorry, baby." Carmen said sincerely, eyes shining with sincerity. "I... I got caught up and I-I shouldn't have even been working that day, I just..."
"I know." You muttered, looking down at the desk, a framed picture of the two of you in Copenhagen at your wedding ceremony. Carmen in his suit, you in your dress, happy and smiling with the breathtaking scenery behind you.
Carmen could feel the guilt growing in his chest, palms sweating and heart racing, the panic to fix it- to do something. "How much longer do you have?" Carmen asked, nodding towards your laptop.
"Just a few more things to edit." You looked at your paused work. "Why?"
"Let me... Let me make it right." Carmen sighed, shaking hands fumbling towards his apron.
"Carmen, you can't leave-"
"-Yeah, yeah, I can." Carmen nodded, pulling the door out and calling for Sydney. "Can you cover tonight, Chef?"
"Uh, yeah, yeah, I can." Sydney nodded.
"I got it too, Cousin-" Carmen shut the door before he could hear Richie's full comment, sure something smart ass would be included.
"Let's go out." Carmen looked at you. "A make up. Please?"
You folded your arms, pouting lightly. "'m not dressed for going out."
"What're you talkin' about? You look beautiful, c'mon." Carmen shook his head lightly at you, shoving his clothes into his bag, pulling out his spare.
You tried not to drool at the sight of his chest. You'd missed him, you really had. It was a shame the lingerie went to waste.
Carmen pulled you out of the restaurant, hand on your waist, holding you close to his side. It wasn't the fancy reservations you'd planned, no Michelin star restaurants with expensive wine. No, instead, he took you to some a rooftop restaurant, one with the vibey aesthetic you always cooed at on Instagram. Sitting and sharing pretzels and greasy food, snuggled into Carmen's side while he ordered dessert. Giggling when he fed you the brownie sundae, tilting your head back with his fingers cradling your jaw lightly. It was simple, romantic, and fun. Made your heart swell, clinging to him the whole way home.
And when you got home? Carmen was in heaven. Letting you show him what he missed a few days earlier.
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sillystringsimpsons · 3 months ago
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Pic unrelated. I just think they're cute here. Lol.
SOMETHING IS WRONG.
A short fanfic set in The Good Ones [AU], featuring Johnny and Frankie.
STORY BELOW CUT!
"Something is wrong."
As he speaks, his leg taps incessantly beneath the dining table: little creaks and the rhythmic scuff of his socks against the linoleum punctuating the syllables and iambs in his anxious words.
"Somethin's always wrong with yous," I mutter. My words are muffled as I lazily press a chunk of bread, drowned to limpness with pumpkin soup, into the pocket my right cheek. "What's the matter, coniglio? Jeez, is it the bread? Sorry, baby, I know you ain't a fan of them baked-in olives, but it's all the bodega had out when I got there-"
"Gio, damnit! I ain't a frigging toddler, I can stomach some damn olives!"
...Jesus.
I like his skittishness. I know it sounds a little patronising, but it's endearing to me; the constant fidgeting and wriggling is as much a part of him as the borrowed trace-scent of my cologne in the crook of his neck and the way he gets little crow's feet by his eyes when he smiles. But this, right now, is more than his day-to-day restlessness: he's cagey today: more so than normal. I can see it in the way his eyes dart frantically around the room, the way those dilated pupils can never quite seem to sit in one place, caught in that same little loop of endless motion as his squirming lower half.
"...Sorry."
As soon as he breaks the silence, I realise I've been absentmindedly holding my breath in - as if, if I had let it go, some inappropriate response to his seemingly unprovoked outburst would have slipped out with it. But he's taken the weight of the reply off my shoulders, leaving me with nothing to do but give a barely audible, shaky out-breath after I choke down the food still in my mouth with an unwittingly stilted swallow.
"I... I, uh, don't apologise, Frankie," is all I manage to offer, at first. "I shouldn't 'a cut you off like that. My foul, alright?"
"No, Johnny, it ain't your fault, babe, I just... I just-"
Ironically, he's never been very good at expressing himself: it's no real surprise that the words he wants to get lost at the tip of his tongue, leaving him with nothing but stutters and frustrated little grunts - and once he's run out of those, all he has left to give is a big, defeated groan as he buries his face into his hands.
"It's just... Things have been good."
That confession, meek and padded by the hum of his lips against his calloused palms, is the absolute last thing I expected to hear.
"Good?"
"Too good," he whines, still refusing to look me in the eyes. "Everything is too damn good, and I feel like somethin' awful is about to happen. I can't freaking relax, Gio, I feel like- Damnit, I don't know, it feels like my brain is full 'a fluid, and- And my head is going to explode- Or somethin'-!"
"What, like, a fever? Frankie, if you got a fever-"
"No, no, it's metaphor-ismical, or freakin'- Whatever you call it! I just... It feels like there are a million bees inside my skull, Johnny. Does that make sense?"
No, not really. The bees, at least: I can't particularly envision something like that, I've never been all that good at creative thinking - or whatever the ability to picture insects in your head is called.
But, what does make sense is the look in his eyes as he raises his gaze: only slightly, just enough to meet my own.
There's a frenetic, anxious energy there, one that I've seen time, and time again: in the eyes of the lanky, up-town sixteen-year-old who'd ride past my shop on his bike a suspicious amount of times every day, in the eyes of the point of contention sat across from me at one too many impromptu meetings of DiMaggio's inner circle, in the eyes of the disgraced caporegime reluctantly settling into his new place among the ranks of my crew...
In the eyes of the man sat opposite me.
I give my best attempt at a sympathetic smile.
"Yeah. It does."
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rose-and-thorn-fanfics · 2 years ago
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Okay so hear me out, eric draven x reader with like either a cute hades x Persephone au with protective eric and lots of fluff OR one where the reader is Shelly reincarnated but like only in soul and some memories not in looks. I imagine eric has some sort of soul bond so he can recognize her. Femme aligned preferred lol of course if you don’t mind, lovely. I figured both were interesting so you might like a crack at it lol thanks darling
Ok! Sorry it took me so long to get around to this :) I’m going with the second option you gave me! Hope you like it!
“The Eyes Are A Window To The Soul” (an Eric Draven x Reader Fanfic) tw: suicidal ideation
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It had been a week and a half since you had last had one of those dreams, and you’d almost convinced yourself that’s all they were: dreams. They couldn’t be memories, even if that’s what they felt like. You’d never been in a relationship before. You’d never even been kissed (one of the many things that your high-school classmates constantly had teased you about until you dropped out). Now you were college aged, and still had no plans for the future. But those dreams… they felt so real. You hated to admit it but they were all you had. ‘And they aren’t even based on anything.’ You stood in front of the road, letting the rain soak you in your misery. You felt so alone on the wet and glistening streets. Nobody cared if you disappeared forever.
A crow cawed, perched on a parked car nearby. It flapped its wings, shaking drops from its feathers. You waited patiently. You just needed a car to speed down that street. Fast enough for you to step out in front of it without it being able to swerve away in time. The crow cawed again, and several cars passed. Police sirens wailed. ‘Not fast enough… but maybe—‘ you heard a screeching noise and the revving of an engine. A silver camry sped recklessly around the corner. At the last second, you jumped out in front of it, only to feel someone catch you by the collar of your coat and pull you back onto the sidewalk. You yelped, cursing loudly as you turned around to see who had prevented your death. Your voice fell short when you saw who had saved you. Even with that makeup, it was unmistakably the man from your dreams.
He blinked at you, face white as the moon and black painted lips forming a frown. “You should be more careful.” He said wearily. “You could’ve easily gotten hit head on. You would be dead if I hadn’t grabbed you in time.”
Indignant ignited inside you, remembering how badly you had wanted to end it all. “I know. I wanted to get hit.” You sighed with a mix of frustration and exhaustion.
The man’s expression darkened, and he brushed a strand of your wet hair from your eyes. His pale fingers brushed your face just slightly, and upon contact with your skin, you saw his eyes widen. He stumbled backwards, completely shocked, like he had seen a ghost. “….Shelly?” He said, breathing heavily.
Hearing that name, you couldn’t explain the sudden emotions that washed over you. The name felt so true, so right, when he addressed you with it. And yet those two syllables stirred up an ache in you you’d almost completely forgotten. You stepped closer to the man.
“You promised me you’d join me in this life again…” He said, leaning against the wall of the brick building behind him for support. “Do you… remember me?” His tone was both loving and desperate. “You look so different. But I swear…” the man’s voice trailed off.
Leaning against the wall next to him, you summoned some courage before opening up. “My name is Y/n, but I have these dreams that feel so real. I was having them every night up until a week ago. You…. were in them. I’m sorry, you must think I’m crazy…” you turned away your head in embarrassment. “But when you called me Shelly… I felt something I haven’t felt in so long.”
The man put his arm over your shoulder and you felt a sense of belonging, a sense of love, almost like a promise. “Eric?” You said. You couldn’t explain why you said that name.
He turned, holding you close and looking you directly in the eyes. “You remember, don’t you?” He smiled with relief. “That’s my name. Those weren’t dreams, Y/n. Those were memories of a past life. Our life. Together.”
“Can you call me Shelly again? I want to remember everything.” You whispered.
“Shelly, I love you.” He whispered in your ear.
A shiver ran down your spine. You felt a new sense of meaning, just from the way Eric held you. Just from that name he called you. “I love you too, Eric.”
Eric kisses your cheek, and you ran your fingers through his dark hair. More memories and flashbacks came back to you as he kissed you again and again, getting closer and closer to your lips until your lips met. Tears streamed down your cheeks, as you remembered all the plans you had made with him for the future. All the moments you’d spent together, and the painful ending to it all. A sense of peace washed over you as your tongue entwined with his. Someone cared. And it made you want to live. It made you dare not to end it all.
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wc-confessions · 6 months ago
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genuine question here, no harm or offense intended.
i haven’t been super involved in the fandom online for about a decade, but over the last year i’ve started to dip my toes back into it. i’ve always read the books, since first launch, but my fandom involvement has been very limited since childhood. so i’m ignorant to some fandom quirks and culture.
can anyone explain to me why some people type out character name in this format - SuffixPrefix ? [ex. “FireHeart” or “IvyPool”]
i haven’t found an answer anywhere online but i keep seeing it, especially on this blog. my best guess is that it could be a language thing - maybe it comes from fans who read the books in a different native language? or maybe it’s something younger readers do to make the act of reading the names easier/more comprehensive?
it’s just a bit jarring for my eyes to read the names like that after only seeing them in the traditional format for nearly 20 years. i know the difference is only one extra capitalized letter, but still.
i guess it gets to me too because it kind of makes my brain read the names like “Fire Heart” rather than “fireheart” - like i read it as two words with emphasis on their first syllable/sound rather than one fluid word with a suffix and prefix. if that makes sense.
and this is not a complaint or me making fun of anyone in anyway - absolutely no judgement - i’m the fool who gets tripped up, no one is at fault for that but me lol.
i just seek to understand because i’ve never seen it before, even when heavily participating in fandom as a child many years ago. if anyone can help me get it, i would really appreciate it!!
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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 10 months ago
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Clutters of Creativity
Could you write one of the sides with a speech and language disorder/impediment? Preferably cluttering just bc that's what I have, but last time I checked there's not that much research on it so I understand if something else would be easier for you lol – anon
ngl as i was doing research for this i was like wait do i do this is this why i can't words so...thanks?
Read on Ao3
Warnings: none
Pairings: none
Word Count: 1359
For as long as Roman can remember, he's had trouble explaining exactly what he means.
That's why being Creativity is so useful, because then he can just take people into the Imagination and show them what he means. Or he's with Remus, and then he doesn't have to explain a thing, because the two of them run through each other's veins and they've never had to explain anything, not really, not when they already know what the other one will do. Their words spill out and over each other like paint constantly dripping down an ever-present canvas and it doesn't matter what words they're actually saying when they can hear what needs to be said clearly in the din of the noise.
But with the others, he has to actually pick and choose the words he wants to use. Language is clumsy. There will never be a perfect way to describe anything, but he has to try. Trying is difficult. He grew up with too many words and too few ways to move his mouth to speak them and so they poured over his tongue in a stream and he was so confused when no one could understand.
You're talking too fast.
You're mumbling.
So he'd slow down. Tapping his finger helped, trying to put one word to each tap, but then they would look at him like he's making fun of them—he's not trying to make fun of them, he's trying to speak clearly. Eventually, he could get it, but he always ended up forgetting the next time. Because how could he focus on what words he was saying when the thing he was trying to say was so much more important?
There are times where he'll repeat words, or he'll try and say a whole word in one syllable, or he's going and going and going and he only realizes that he's been doing it again when the person he's talking to looks so, so lost. And then he just wants to bring them into the Imagination where he can show them what he's trying to say, and they'll understand. But that only works for his ideas and his projects, not for questions like 'where did you put the coffee mugs?' Or 'why is there a book on the table?' Or if he's just…talking.
Roman is Creativity. Ideas curl off of him like steam on a winter morning, he can't help it. And if the ideas are coming too fast for the words to keep up, well, then the words will have to fall by the wayside. If he's focusing on talking, then he can get them in the right order with the right phrasing with the right pacing with the right intonation before they come out of his mouth. But that's so many things to focus on instead of focusing on the idea. And once an idea tastes the inattention, trying to wrangle it back is like grasping at smoke.
You're stuttering, it became.
You're slurring.
Why can't you finish a sentence?
He tries not to get frustrated, both with himself and with everyone else. He knows that's not the end of his sentence, but they keep treating it like it is. He knows what he needs to say next, but when they interrupt and try to finish it for him, it breaks his train of thought and he has to start all over. Or he starts sounding like a skipping record, repeating the same word over and over until he can force the next one out. And then, oh, and then the people he's trying to share his ideas with will smile at him with that blank, almost politely pitying smile as they say that's great, Roman, and turn away to do something else. And he wants to pull them back and say no, I'm not finished yet, I've barely said anything, but then he's said too much and the words just won't work the way he wants them to.
It doesn't help that as he grows, so does his Creativity.
Logan describes it this way once—and to this day, he's not sure if it's a compliment or not—when Roman had been talking with him: You're the only person I know who interrupts themselves. Which is true. He'll start telling one story, and then he'll interrupt himself and tell another one, and then he'll interrupt and tell another one. He has so many thoughts, all ricocheting around, that trying to get them to stop bonking around the inside of his head he has to just grab the words as they fly past him. Which does not necessarily lead to the most coherent or intelligible way of speaking. He grabs one set of words and they come out jumbled. He grabs another set and the one that goes right in the middle of the sentence doesn't fly past until way later than the ones that come at the end of the sentence. He grabs yet another and they all try to come out at the same time. And then he's just sitting there, holding words that he's shed as easily as time sheds his memories of the ideas that could be less permanent than breaths of the wind, and he has to be content with the seldom few that fall into place.
Sometimes he thinks that he's trying to speak the way he puts together jigsaw puzzles. Find the corners first, then the edges, then the middle. The problem is he knows exactly what piece connects the two ends of the picture, he just can't find it in the box in time.
In an ironic twist, it's actually his role as Creativity that's helped him the most.
He writes more often that he talks, truly, if he thinks about it. The speaking that he does day to day to get by isn't really talking, not in the way that his writing is his talking just through words on a page or screen rather than out loud. The ways in which he learns to make his sentences on paper—or on screen—are the ways in which he has to say them out loud. The more he practices, the better he gets. And if he tries to speak how he writes, well, only Remus is going to hear him and Remus would never judge him for anything.
Remus is still here, of course, because they're Creativity and nothing will ever, ever truly keep them from each other, and he helps in his own way. Roman gets stuck in his head, stuck on his words, and nothing in the Mindscape is quite as jarring as Remus to get him to stop thinking too much and just go. That spilling over each other with their words is more helpful than ever sometimes, when all Roman needs is to go and Remus is there to hear through the dissonance. Of course, then they have to come back to everyone else and explain it, but it's easier to describe smoke when you have a picture of what it looks like. He can trace the curves of the idea with his words and make sure his pauses don't interrupt the lines, and Remus is there to help him when he can't quite say what he needs to say next.
Because at the end of the day, it isn't the smoke that he really wants to convey, it's the spark. The problem is that every spark creates so much smoke that it's hard for him to keep from choking on it.
Remus snorts and tells him he's had too much of Virgil's poetry when he tries to explain it using that analogy. But a few days later, there's a little air purifying plant in a pot with a green smiley-face outside his door, and Roman grins.
He knew his brother would understand.
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zhansww · 1 month ago
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Zhanww, thank you for all your posts, I thoroughly enjoyed reading them. I have one for you, just my feelings as you mentioned learning Chinese. Pls listen to the bday song by zz, when he sings "thank you for sending me the good night", it does not sound like he sang "good night", rather, wan-ai, the word love. My mandarin is not great, but I can hear he did not sing the 2nd word for good night, zz sang the word love instead. pls ask your Chinese friends to listen carefully to the last word. tx
Feel free to just call me Arya^^
No matter how many times I listen to it, I always hear "an"... I did see ggdd fans on wb point out that the pinyin for "good night" i.e. 晚安 wan'an can stand for "wo ai ni, ai ni". But even if it does and that's what gg meant... so what? I took that video to just be a thank you to his fans for all the birthday wishes and fan support or whatever. Heck, if dd had made a public "good night" wb post that day, I would consider this meaningful but as it is, I don't really get what's special about what gg sang/meant, regardless of what those last hanzi are intended to be interpreted as. Oh and I don't have any Chinese friends lol. But I did listen many times myself and sure, gg sorta elongates the syllable cuz he's singing it but I still only hear "an" >.< Maybe that clip was just a snippet of an actual, upcoming song, tho? And if there really is a whole song, then that one line may make more sense within its context... Did you listen to gg's performance of 月亮代表我的心, tho? I may not have pointed that out (cuz it's too obvious lol) but the lyrics of that song are so f-cking romantic; we all know who gg was thinking of when he sang that~
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journey-to-the-attic · 6 months ago
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I don’t know if I actually said this yet since I keep falling asleep while checking tumblr at night but the song parody you’re making for oh dear me is super cute!!! It’s also doubly cool because you’re making it for two languages at once and it was neat to see some of your thought processes when explaining how you were changing Beel and Belphie’s canonical name spellings to share the first character.
thank you!!!! actually, to talk about this a little bit because i've just realised how much i'd like to... the thing with my level of chinese is that most of the new lines, i have to come up with in english first, then translate in a way that still fits the flow of the lyrics+rhyme scheme (then re-translate because of the differences in phrasing or exact definition lol)
there were some things that i didn't notice unless i went back and actually sung through the lines for myself, where e.g. repeated homophones or slight differences in rhyme made it feel awkward. in most cases this just entailed further changes to the original lyrics, which by now are only really fully intact in the final chorus
so the "why aren't you saying anything?" line from the og got changed to "you haven't punished anyone lately" because a change to a previous line meant that the "hua" sound was repeated, and that sounded weird. ultimately though i like the change better, since it tailors the song even more towards lucifer lol
actually i wanted from the start to have one of the items on lucifer's schedule be "argue with satan over something pointless", but that particular section of the song is tricky because it's delivered very fast, and i had two issues, both of which i wasn't sure what to do with, mostly owing to a limited vocabulary:
my translation of "argue over something pointless" took up too many syllables to fit into a pretty short line
i wanted to leave the last "zhui" intact - or at least the "ui" sound -bc the whole flow of the thing sounded just a little off when i changed it
i was saved very recently by remembering the phrase "抬杠拌嘴" so now the line is this
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final note on the demons' names... there are standard chinese phonetic translations which as far i can tell are what the game uses? i'm sure there were reasons for the characters/sounds chosen for those that surpass my limited knowledge, so for the most part i'm just sticking to them-
(even though i have no idea why they chose dan for satan when there IS a tan sound in the language? satan -> 撒谈 -> sātán c'mon guys!!!! 谈 even has the character for fire in it! fire as in hell where he lives!!! it works!
(side note again but i was really amused by how simeon becomes ximian which yeah that makes sense but i was expecting something more complicated. btw if you switched one of the characters in mammon's name it'd translate to horse door)
-but for the twins specifically i just really wanted to make the change bc it's very common for siblings to share characters in their name, and bei'er as a sound fit better with how beelzebub is pronounced in english (to me)
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sailorshadzter · 9 months ago
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some modern jonsa that i was inspired to write after seeing a word prompt list ive since lost since i didnt reblog it lol
tw: domestic violence mention
tbh i had every intention of writing more for this but realized ive written this same plot line too many times & it turned me off from finishing it any further lol
ANYWAYS
His phone rings, an unfamiliar number flashing across the screen. 
At once he knows, somehow, within the depths of his mind just who would be on the other end of that call. He reaches, thumb clicking the green button, putting the phone to his ear. “Hello?” He says, but the only response is a small, yet sharp intake of air, then the blare of the dial tone. His hand falls back to his side, phone gripped tightly in his palm- he thinks for a moment he might move on, a wrong number perhaps, but his heart twists and he knows. 
So he pulls it back upwards, clicking the number and listening as the ringing begins once more.
She gasps, the phone she holds lighting up, the number she’d only just dialed a few moments ago flashing on the screen, calling her back. Her heart skips a beat, a tremor of fear rushing the length of her spine, but she steels her heart against it and answers the call. “Jon…?” 
Jon… 
The voice is familiar, despite the time that’s passed since he last heard it. “Sansa…” he greets softly, gray eyes closing for a long, silent moment. “It’s been a long time,” he continues, perhaps with a sharper tone than he intends, opening his eyes so he might stare at the single photo he keeps on the table beside his couch- it’s from five summers back, when Robb had been alive and his time was so often spent with the Stark family that he was usually mistaken for just another of their many children. 
She knew this was a mistake. 
It’s been nearly three years since she last saw Jon, since she even spoke to him, let alone saw him, so why would he want to talk to her now? Besides… It wasn’t like he’d tried to call, either, at least not recently. “I know,” she says, holding onto whatever bravery is left in her heart. “I’m sorry.”
Her voice breaks over the syllables of apology and something tells Jon that this nine o’clock call on a Tuesday night isn’t just to catch up. “Sansa… What is it?” He softens now, empty hand tightening into a fist at his side, his mind whirring with every possibility. 
On the other end, Sansa steps into the bathroom, flipping on the light so she can stare into the mirror. The face that stares back at her is one she almost doesn’t recognize, not with the bruises and the tears, the eyes haunted by what’s been done. She shudders, closing her eyes for another moment more, wishing she could find the words to say to him. “I… I need help.” She finally says, softly, brokenly, a fresh tear falling down her face. 
The silence that falls lasts all of twenty seconds before he speaks. 
“I’ll be there tomorrow.” 
[ x x x ]
When his truck pulls into the driveway, she’s already at the door.
She slips out the front door so she can stand there on the front steps, watching as he climbs from his truck and makes his way up the drive, looking quite like a man that’s drove all night long to get to her side. Her heart skips a beat as he climbs up the two steps to stand on the porch, his familiar gray eyes sweeping her up and down. “Sansa…” He says her name in such a way that her knees buckle and he’s reaching for her then, embracing her as he’s only done once or twice before. He’s warm and smells like shitty gas station coffee and cigarettes- he still stress smokes, it would seem. 
“Come in…” Is all she says, drawing away and returning inside, holding the door open for him to come in after her. 
They stand there in the foyer for a long moment, he merely staring at her, words unable to form on his lips. He swallows, hesitantly reaching a hand out, fingertips trailing along her swollen lower lip, across the ugly bruise that stains her ivory skin black and blue. “When?” He asks, tight lipped and somber, a look in his eyes that she’s never seen before. 
“Yesterday…” She admits softly. “Right before I called you.”
Jon nods, taking in the information; he was who she called in her most desperate time of need. “Is it the first time?” He asks next and when she hesitates to answer, he knows it isn’t. “Where is he now?” His next question comes, palm cradling her cheek, his heart thumping so loudly he imagines she must be able to hear it plain as day. 
“I don’t know,” she answers honestly. “Maybe his parents house, maybe his flat,” she hasn’t seen nor heard from Joffrey since he stormed out of her place the day before. But, she knows it won’t last- he’ll return home eventually, perhaps with a huge bouquet of flowers, or perhaps a diamond tennis bracelet. Anything he can buy to get her to accept his apology, his tears and promises always enough to convince her that it would never happen again. “He has a place over by the University.” She pulls away, but Jon reaches for her hand, keeping her there. “Jon…” She begins, but sighs, shaking her head. “Thank you for coming.” 
 “I’m glad you called me…” Jon tilts his head and chuckles softly, drawing her back in for a tight embrace.
She will be safe from now on. 
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aboyshapeddog · 10 months ago
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WIP ⚠️
Halloween on the compound
Relationships: Staci Pratt/Jacob Seed
Rating: NR (no smut but i’m building up to it lol)
Warnings: Alcohol Use, Collars
Jacob was getting drunk, well buzzed. In the wake of a proverbial ceasefire for the holiday, he had no reason to keep up his post. Really, he could take one night off. If his Chosen couldn’t handle themselves without physical guidance for a single day, they weren’t worth keeping, were they. There was a knock at his door. No matter how light, the echo would ring ominously through the office, bouncing off the thick wood; though not that many had the guts to bother Jacob if he wasn’t immediately available. The Herald tossed back the glass of whisky in his hand and hummed to himself as it went down, sliding further into his seat. With one leg propped on his desk, and the other planted by the leg of his chair, he felt the whisky spread across his chest, warm. Now made comfortable, he answered, voice rough from the drink “What is it”.
The door creaked open just enough for Deputy Pratt to slide himself through the gap, and shut it quietly behind him, “Sir” he responded. The tentative greeting almost lost itself if not for the ear ringing silence of the room. “What is it, Pratt.” His words were slower than usual, faintly giving way to a drawl on the last syllables. Jacob thought idly if Staci had noticed his inebriation (Stacj had) he wouldn’t even think to acknowledge it (Staci wouldn’t), he had his dogs trained well. Speak, Sit, Stay . . . Beg. Staci began to rattle off tallies and quotas reached from his clipboard, stopping tentatively between some to gauge Jacobs reaction. The oldest Seed just stared, impassively, the Deputy’s words buzzing in his ear quiet and clipped; But his body taught like a bow, all lean muscle, did he always look this tense?
“C’mere”. Jacob’s voice was rougher than rough.
Staci froze, looking up from his clipboard. “I can’t hear a damn word you’re saying. Come here.” Pratt knew well enough not to show his apprehension, he also knew how little Jacob enjoyed repeating himself. He stepped up to the desk quickly, fixing his posture and puffing up his chest for good measure. Maybe his false bravado would get him some extra points this time.
The first words out of his mouth still came with a stutter, eyes back to the board Staci. Not to the massive man tracing ridges on the whiskey glass with his fingers, not to the way he’s tracing you with his eyes. Board, Staci. As he continued listing, Jacob began grumbling noises of affirmation or disapproval to certain things, which Staci made mental notes of, not daring even now to move from his position of attention. Then Jacob got up from his seat, and stepped close. Staci could smell the alcohol on the breath of the other man, his breath hitched, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. Closer.
Staci couldn’t help the blush that crept up his cheeks and neck, it could’ve been the cold, must’ve been the cold. The cold and the hot breath he could feel prickling his skin from the mountain in front of him, yeah that had to be it. The Deputy finished listing and looked up. That was a mistake. The look Jacob had fixed him with turned his blood to ice, and set butterflies loose in his stomach; there was a fox in the hen house. Staci’s mouth opened and closed. Less than a foot away, Jacob licked his teeth.
A meaty hand reached in to Staci’s space, “What’s this . . . Peaches.” Jacob cracked a sharp toothy smile. He was so fucked. “That’s uh-“ he couldn’t even think of what to say -sorry Sir in a moment of pure delusion I thought it would be ironic to dress like the attack dog you treat me as- “it’s um” Who was he kidding this was insane, evidence of a mental break if anything; and now he was wearing a fucking dog collar in Jacob’s office, well a cat collar if it mattered. Jacob loomed over him, thick fingers heavy as they rubbed around and under the thick leather. “What is it, Peaches, cat got your tongue?”. Staci’s mouth went dry. He looked Jacob in his eyes again. “l uh, Halloween costume Sir.” He could hear the blood in his ears.
“Oh.” Jacob said, actually seeming half surprised. He stepped back from Staci, turning back to his desk, and drink. “Is that what that is?” The oldest Seed took back his seat behind the desk. Staci could breathe again. “Yes, Sir.”
“Well” Jacob grumbled “That about covers it doesn’t it, Peaches.” He paused looking Staci up and down slowly, drinking him in, gauging his reaction. Unless he could feel Pratt’s heart rate increase under his scrutiny everything should be fine, but Staci didn’t doubt that he might have that ability. In Jacob’s presence his brain always seemed to run a mile a minute, but still, not. fast. enough. He should say something, “Yes, Sir” good one Stace way to think on your feet. The Deputy turned to leave, and “Aht, aht, aht” Jacob’s chair pushing out from its resting position across the wooden floor sounded like a car wreck, it rattled Staci entirely. “You’re not ready to walk out like that are you?” Jacob seemed to move without moving, he hadn’t made a sound, the chair had but this massive man had closed this distance between the Deputy and himself in a matter of seconds, without making a sound. It attracted and terrified him completely, he understood deer in the path of LED headlights. “Are you, Peaches?”. That was a question. “Uh- No, Sir?” Jacob smiled, good answer, relief. “No, Sir.” Jacob repeated back to him, and reached for the collar again; This time handling the buckle, smoothing his thumb over the metal tip before tightening it a notch around Staci’s throat, warm.
It was still loose, made for a bigger cat than him, Jacob thought; but it made Staci’s head spin. Jacob pulled at it, bringing their faces within inches of one another. “Next time i’ll get you one that fits, huh, Peaches.” Oh God. “Ye-Yes, Sir.”
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starlitwishforu · 1 year ago
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青玉案 · 元夕 - 辛弃疾 english translation (and notes!)
ok well. all this chinese poetry posting has put me on a bit of a translation high so i wanted to share my most recent translation project, which i actually just finished recording and uploading yesterday after two whole months of waffling. the poem itself is SO fucking cute but SO hard to translate and i'm honestly very proud that i stuck with it to the end. it instantly became one of my top favourites the very first time i heard it so i hope other people can also find some joy from it!
here is the original:
青玉案 · 元夕
【宋】 辛弃疾
东风夜放花千树,更吹落、星如雨。宝马雕车香满路。凤箫声动,玉壶光转,一夜鱼龙舞。
蛾儿雪柳黄金缕,笑语盈盈暗香去。众里寻他千百度,蓦然回首,那人却在 灯火阑珊处。
and here is my translation:
Qing Yu An: Lantern Festival at Dusk
by Xin Qiji
Fireworks blossom beneath the touch of evening's eastern breeze; flurrying as they fall, sparks shower like stars. Prancing steeds pull chiseled carriages, sweeping fragrance across the path. The xiao’s decadent notes adrift, the jadelike light’s prismatic shift; the dragon-fish dance as the night-hours pass.
Combs shining in their hair, golden, silver, silken sway; sweet perfume and tinkling mirth linger in their wake. My searching gaze is futile as I scan the thronging crowds; at last I turn, and you are there, in the quiet dark of evening wane.
translation notes beneath the cut! there is a LOT, be warned!
translation notes:
so to start from the very top, let's first introduce the title 青玉案 · 元夕.
青玉案 (pinyin: Qing Yu An, lit. the matter of the verdant jade) is actually the name of a 宋词排名 (song cipaiming, song dynasty poetic/musical form). just as shakespeare wrote sonnets and basho wrote haiku, so the poets of the song dynasty wrote, among hundreds of other forms with fun names like this, Qing Yu An poems.
each 词排名 had a set number of characters per line, set rules for its tone patterns, and even came with its own tune. maybe a better western parallel would be twinkle twinkle little star, which uses the same tune as the alphabet song and baa baa black sheep.
the end result is that there are many titles under the heading of Qing Yu An, and even, according to chatgpt, another 青玉案 · 元夕.
anyway, this one by Xin Qiji, the most famous one, is titled 元夕 (yuanxi); 元 refers to 元宵节 (yuanxiaojie), the lantern festival held on the fifteenth day of the lunar new year which marks the end of the spring festival/chinese new year, and 夕 is dusk. hence a very naturally poetic name, lantern festival at dusk.
before i get into the text of the poem, i want to note that i often sacrifice rhythm/rhyme for precision of meaning. i ✨artistically✨ speed up/slow down some syllables while recording to preserve some sense of metre lol, but it does read quite awkwardly on paper. i'm a very inexpert student and have a lot to improve on!
ok so! line by line!
东风夜放花千树
--is a literally genius pun. it transliterates as: the east wind in the evening blows open the flowers of a thousand trees. very spring, right? haha spring festival get it.
however! its a chinese celebration, so what will there definitely be? fireworks 😎 and it just so happens that one word for "setting off fireworks" in chinese is 放烟花 (fang yanhua). yep, that's the same 花, which means flowers, but when combined with 烟 (smoke), it becomes a "fire-flower" 🎆!!
it's also the same 放, which in the context of actual flowers means the opening of petals, but in the phrase 放烟花 means to set off (the fireworks).
together, this line evokes both the blooming of the spring flowers under the eastern breeze* and the blooming of a thousand fireworks in the evening sky.
*spring comes from the east ofc; this is folklore and not science i think but lends to the spring-ness of the line
更吹落,星如雨
this one is pretty straightforward. lit. blown through the air by aforementioned wind, falling like a rain shower of stars.
宝马雕车香满路
oh boy. when i tell you my mom (who is my chinese teacher) and i got in several petty arguments over baomadiaoche...
so 宝马 (baoma) are just well-bred horses, prize steeds with a pedigree. a 雕车 (diaoche) (lit. carved chariot) is a very expensive carriage carved with lots of intricate decorations. in other words, these ppl are RICH.
however, it was difficult to convey the sheer decadence of 宝马雕车 without either using a miles worth of syllables or entirely losing the original cultural context. carved was too direct and ugly to hear besides, etched was not elite enough, sculpted conveyed entirely the wrong image... also, for some reason, "proud" to describe steeds was vetoed for being inaccurate???? hence the arguments.
in this scenario, the final word choice really is a matter of the least bad option.
at the same time, the second half of this line 香满路 (lit. fragrance fills the path) implies movement: the carriage is passing by, leaving the fragrance of rich people perfume in its wake. for the sake of syllables, i shifted that movement to the fragrance part of this line. i also like that this evokes a high-headed noble sweeping elegantly through the crowds.
overall, this line adds to the picture of a decadent, bustling market street during the most joyous celebration of the year.
凤箫声动,玉壶光转,一夜鱼龙舞
lit. the notes of the phoenix xiao (chinese recorder) move, jade gourd light shimmers, the fish dragons dance all night.
chinese ppl, ok, use two motifs to describe the beauty and virtue of every artistic thing ever: phoenix and jade. phoenix xiao means NOTHING. it's like virtuous xiao. jade gourd is a little harder; some say it's the moon, some say it's the lanterns. jade and light put together kinda implies moon anyway, so i just sidestepped the problem entirely.
as for 鱼龙 (lit. fish dragons), theyre a type of dragon lantern which supposedly has some characteristic of a fish. they are puppet-danced on sticks - dragon dancing, the classic. my mom and i both had a vivid image of this dragon-lantern-dancing, but we couldn't find it ANYWHERE. if anyone knows the right search query to pull this up, please lmk how to tame 谷大哥*. anyway, i left the lanterns implied because idk how the fuck to explain this whole thing in four syllables.
*lit. big bro google. its funnier in chinese
蛾儿雪柳黄金缕
this is the line that, when i finally bothered to properly research it, made everything about this translation click into place. these are all hair decorations. 蛾儿 (lit. li'l moth) are silk moths, 雪柳 (lit. snow willow) are silver tassels, and 黄金缕 (lit. yellow-golden cords) are gold cords lmao. hence golden silver silken sway, which was SO satisfying to come up with.
笑语盈盈暗香去
lit. laughing speech tinkles and faint fragrance goes by. this one is also fairly straightforward. 去 means to go, so we specifically want the image of a group of giggly teenage girls fading into the crowd.
众里寻他千百度。蓦然回首,那人却在 灯火阑珊处。
and finally we reach the most famous line, the 千古名句 (qiangumingju) - iconic line of a thousand histories!
lit. within the crowd, searching for him* in a thousand hundred directions; suddenly the head turns, it turns out that person is standing in the darkness where the lights have gone out.
*"him" is highly debated. 他, used in modern chinese like the pronoun "he", was historically a catchall pronoun for people of any gender. iirc, 她 for "she", and the gendered distinction, was only introduced when china started integrating to the west. in this line, 他 could be the teen girl that just passed by, or her beau. whichever way, one is the searcher, the other is the searched. i chose here to sidestep this by using i and you bc fuck gender.
anyway, when the searcher's head turns - even this bit had to be suitably poetic, a nightmare - they find their lover in the 灯火阑珊处.
灯火阑珊处 this phrase refers to a very specific image. imagine, in the early hours of the morning, a dwindling market street; the stands are closing one by one, lights winking out, leaving a gentle blanket of dark and calm behind. it is the quiet after the rain, the breath after the shout; it is the sigh of closing your front door at the end of the night. it's not the absence or complete lack of light, but rather the exit of it. a place of that just-left-behind dark is a 灯火阑珊处.
this sentence gave me so much grief and i am so proud to have done it even just a little bit of justice.
so after all that, the scene described by this poem is something like this: a lively late-night market street. people from many walks of life fill the path, celebrating the lantern festival, the turn of a new year and coming of spring, a riotous party of light and noise and joy. as the night slips into the sixteenth, the market begins winding down, stalls closing and lights winking out. amongst the teeming crowds ambling their way home, a young person searches for the their lover from whom they were separated; on some sudden instinct, they turn, to find their lover already looking back from the darkness of the fading festival, gaze caught in the divide between light and dark, wake and sleep: a quiet young love on the edge of spring, something fresh and new.
if anyone made it to this point, thank you and i hope this was an interesting read! please feel free to add comments questions and observations!! i would love to discuss at any level with someone other than my mom and chinese poetry truly is one of my passions even when it makes me want to kill, so i'm always down to talk. :] <3
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andrigyn · 3 months ago
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Snippet Sunday < 3
Thanks for tagging me @retroghosting , sorry I'm two days late lol
Homelander was baffled by his sudden summons to the labs of Vought tower, especially over something as mundane as a blood sample. A scowl twisted his features as he left the elevator and paced down the gleaming, sterile hallway. The white walls and floors seemed to stretch on without end, and the astringent stench of chemicals hung heavy in the air, prompting him to wrinkle his nose. Just being here felt like a physical assault, and though the air burned his nose, he didn’t dare breathe through his mouth. He might throw up. 
Eventually he came to the door marked with the number matching the one Ashley had scrawled onto the piece of paper she handed him this morning. He crumbled it in his hand before he twisted the knob, and pushed the door open. 
The room was cramped and utilitarian, inhabited only by two chairs, a desk, and the small woman who sat hunched over it. She jerked upright at the sound of the door clicking open.
Wasn’t she expecting him?
‘Oh, hello sir, you’re late,’ she hastily set down the stack of papers she had been engrossed in, her hands trembling slightly as she turned to face him. ‘But no worries, I’m sure you have more important things to do than sit here and be my guinea pig. I’ll be quick.’ 
She was strikingly beautiful, even in the harsh overhead lighting that Homelander was certain was accentuating his every wrinkle and blemish (not that there were many of them). Her features, though softened by fatigue, remained arresting: full lips, carefully arched brows, and large brown eyes, or were they green? He couldn’t be sure. The oversized lab coat she wore swallowed her small frame, and she slouched horribly. Her heart was still beating as quickly as it was when he first entered the room. How cute. 
He couldn’t blame her, he got the impression that she was new. Was he the first member of the Seven she’d ever met? The first supe? 
‘Could you roll up a sleeve sir? Whichever arm you prefer, it doesn’t matter.’ 
Of course it didn’t matter. Who was she to tell him which arm to expose? She was lucky that he was cooperating at all, because if it were up to him, he would have lasered her pretty face off. This place had a way of messing with his mind, making him lose his patience. But his orders came from Madelyn, so he did as he was asked, removing his right glove and rolling his sleeve up until his elbow was bare. 
‘And your name is?’ He asked. 
‘Dr. Hartley, sir,’ she said, fiddling with her gloves. Loudly. 
His lips pulled back into a forced smile. ‘That’s your last name, silly. I meant your first name.’
‘Vevina, sir.’ She didn’t make eye contact as she spoke, instead taking an alcohol pad and wiping it against his arm. She examined it for a moment, and then applied a tourniquet with deft fingers. 
He scowled. ‘Enough with the sir. Just Homelander is fine.’ 
‘Okay,’ she said, still not bothering to look at him. ‘I’m going to take the sample now.’ 
The needle didn’t hurt, but it was unnerving enough to him that he looked away as she stuck it inside. The first container began to fill with red liquid, but there were five more after that. 
‘Vevina, Vevina, Ve-vi-na,’ he tapped his fingertips along the armrest of his chair, ‘Does anyone ever call you… Vev? Or Vina?’ 
‘No.’ 
‘I like Vev, has a nice ring to it. Vevina is a bit… long, don’t you think?’ 
‘Oh I don’t know if I’d say that, it’s three syllables, just like Homelander.’ She swapped in a second vial and watched as it filled with red liquid. 
His upper lip twitched. ‘Vev it is, then.’ 
‘Sure, why not.’ She swapped in a third vial, and then the fourth… her attention clearly elsewhere.
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savoureuxx · 2 months ago
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tagged by @godspetdog thank you!! <3
Do you make your bed? sometimes but i get back in bed many times throughout the day so there's really no point lol
What's your favourite number? i wouldn't say i have a favorite but i do have an annoying habit of counting syllables by multiples of three so that would be it
What is your job? unemployed forever and ever
If you could go back to school, would you? im in school right now! second year english major at community college and hoping to transfer to university next fall.
Can you parallel park? no im terrified of driving
A job you had that would surprise people? unemployed. forever and ever. i get paid for taking care of my neighbors' cats but that's not particularly interesting.
Do you think aliens are real? yes but not like tall grey humanoids. water has been found on other planets so that's pretty promising.
Can you drive a manual car? i cannot drive any kind of car lol
What's your guilty pleasure? i don't feel guilty about pleasure but i am slightly embarrassed about the fact that im a kpop fan...
Tattoos? nope and i dont plan on getting any
Favorite color? red and black
Favorite type of music? i don't stick to a specific genre but some all-time favorites are queen, devo, radiohead, blur, & green day. and i am currently in the midst of a deep infatuation with rufus wainwright.
Do you like puzzles? yes! i have a whole cabinet of jigsaw puzzles and im pretty good at crosswords and stuff like that.
Any phobias? not proper diagnosed ones but i have a lot of nightmares about drowning
Favorite childhood sport? i was really good at taking twenty minutes to walk the mile and getting picked last for teams
Do you talk to yourself? nope
What movies do you adore? i have too many so i'll give you a top ten: the rocky horror picture show, alien, re-animator, withnail & i, trainspotting, velvet goldmine, american psycho, prisoners, crimson peak, & the lighthouse
Coffee or tea? not a huge fan of either but coffee is okay when it's heavily sweetened and diluted with dairy
First thing you wanted to be when you grew up? author
tagging @corpsecoded @syndromette @twinnedpeaks and anyone else who wants to <3 no pressure of course
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anglerflsh · 1 year ago
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re: your poetry post, can you give some pointers as to where to learn the rhyming patterns in poetry and the like? i only ever see poetry from the ideas/feelings perspective, but ive never learned the logic and structure behind it lol
I've learned most of it from my literature and grammar classes, it's taught in our school since elementary, so I wouldn't know of any books or manuals that talk specifially about it - but I can give you a rundown of how I do it, anon, if it counts for anything lol
Prefacing that this will be starting from italian poetica because that's what I know best: any poem, but specifically the pre-futurism/1910s ones (A Lot) will have some kind of structure aside from just the ryming scheme; The structure I am most familiar with is accentual-sillabic, so for example any single verso will have its stressed syllable in a fixed potision and occasionally a set number of sillables (eg. an endecasillablic metre means a stress on the tenth syllable, usually penultimate, equally to 11 total syllables), but there are also only accentual, or only sillabic verses, common in French poetry (?), all of which count as types of qualitative metre - as well as quantitative metre, which was more widley used in Latin and Greek poetry and which rather based itself on patterns of syllable weight (something that I know little about tbh; I think it's based on the lenght of pronunciation of the actual syllable).
this, of course, goes without even mentioning free-verse structure and less well-known ones.
Going back to the rhyming scheme, that also comes into play with structure in the sense that ... there are just a lot of them to pick from. The classic is the repeated AABB one, where each verse will rhyme with the one underneath (''kissing rhyme'' in italian), or the alterning ABAB, the crossed ABBA, the 'chained' or third rhyme ABA BCB CDC used for terzine, and plenty more! That's not all the ways to classify rhymes of course: you have plain rhyme between words accented on the penultimate syllable, cut rhyme between words accented on the last, sdrucciola with accents on the third-to-last, bisdrucciola on the fourth-to-last... etc etc
Then, of course, come the classifications in stanza lenghts! Groups of three verses are a terzina, well known for being Dante's favourite number (joke inserted to lighten this infodump), groups of four a quatrina, etc -
and depending on the number of single groups and on the type of verses in them, you have further classification as canzone, ode, madrigale, carme, filastrocca, ballata, sonetto... the latter for example is made of fourteen endecasyllabic verses grouped in two quartine, one in the beginning and one in the end, in crossed or alternate rhyme, and two terzine with any kind of rhyme structre.
this of course doesn't touch on the inner things and games of poem structure like the falling rhyme, spaces in between groups, enjambement, alliteration, allegorical figures, anafore, onomatopee, and all that fun stuff! Essentially when you see a poem look for the number of syllables in each verse, where the stressed syllable falls, how the rhymes are put, how many verses are in each stanza and strofa...
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ooffmlsorry · 1 year ago
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The One Piece OC
*Banging pots and pans* Time for the One Piece self insert OC post simply because I'm 90% sure I'm happy with her picrew after like 10 different looks.
Note: I'm gonna interject with Law and Straw Hat crew interactions because it's just more fun that way I guess
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Her name is Kilala. It's fine to call her Kiki as a nickname, but usually it's Kilala. Luffy calls her "Lala" because if any syllable should be repeated it's the one that's already in her name lol "Like what??" He's so confused.
She's 22 See she's definitely not a self-insert because she's younger than me lol 🙃
I haven't quite figured out her full backstory but I know for sure the World Govt. screwed over her entire island for centuries. It's been broken a part over time. Basically mined and destroyed for its resources so that it's uninhabitable. It sunk a little over a 100 years ago. Some mistake it for Atlantis, but it's not.
She ate a devil fruit when she was so small she doesn't even remember it happening, actually. Like she was 3 or 4 years old. She knew nothing of DFs and just ate it, much like Luffy.
Kilala didn't spend any time on her native island. Her grandmother was the last generation to live on it. A lot of evacuees died at sea.
She was shipped away with her cat Moremi to attend a prestigious school. She was probably about 7.
The erasure of her island has been something that's plagued her her whole life so now it's her dream to catalog as many cultures as possible. She's essentially a folklorist.
To make sure nothing gets in her way she's really good with survival, basic medicine, and she's a pretty solid diplomat given she knows a lot about different cultures. Somewhat giving the Ranger dnd class if you're familiar
For self defense I imagine she uses a bow and arrow but in the grand scheme of things that feels pretty flimsy unless she uses Haki but I haven't decided that yet. But generally she's good with any projectile. She's also not too shabby when it comes to hand to hand fighting either.
She goes off on her journey to catalog cultures when she's 19, traveling with any normal ship up until the red line, and then sneaking on to pirate ships with larger crews to get her where she needed to go.
She ends up on Punk Hazard when the ship she was hitching on wrecks and basically survives there in hiding until she meets Law where she joins his crew because if anyone's gonna be in the center of what's going on in the world it's a member of the worst generation
Also because of her DF she'd be pretty useful in reconnaissance and Law can't deny a massive advantage
The way she has to bite her tongue to keep from asking Law a million questions about the Summit War.
And don't even get her started on the Straw Hats, she's like a more polite Bartolomeo. Although she does actually scream when she meets Robin because Robin is a little bit of her hero
So uh...that's all I'm gonna put for now because that's a lot. There's more especially interaction wise but eh...this is enough. If the mood strikes me I'll post again. Thanks!
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