#i know in my heart that the series will want us to root for hawkeye

[musing-and-music]

Royai week 2023 fic recs

In honor of Royai week in the Fruits & Roots server, I chose to highlight some of my favorite Royai fics I gathered these past years (not many years, since I've been on AO3 for 2 years and a half only). Each day, I'll recommend a few fics in a particular setting

Day 3: Heredity - Post-Canon fics

There's so many good post-canon fics that I had to make a choice among all the ones I have! Post-canon is so vast, it can go from right after Promised Day to Roy and Riza's old days after they've done everything they had to do. This will be one of the longest rec lists I'll do this week!

Heartbeat (series) by nightofnyx8 / @nightofnyx8

There is only one room in the Mustang household that has never been used. The walls are white, painted with butterflies, and the cradle sits just below the window. A small white dresser stands in the corner, with silver fastenings on each drawer. It holds not patterned clothes or socks lined with lace, just two white boxes that sit right atop. Mother's Day piece for the one and only Riza Hawkeye.

Roy Mustang has a basic understanding of what a father shouldn’t do: don’t run off and abandon your family, don’t transmute your child into a doomed chimera, don’t tattoo your alchemic research onto your daughter’s back— But as to what a father should do…well, that was a different matter entirely. Father's Day Piece for Roy Mustang

You'll end up believing I only rec fics that make me cry, but I swear, if I cry while reading something, that means the author has found the right words to move me, and that's (for me) the best indicator (with laughing) of a writer's quality. And that author is amongst my favorites!

Roy and Riza Observation Journal by hanamuri / @hanamuri

Rumor has it, Roy and Riza are having an illicit affair. No, Riza’s just one name in his list of exes, sprung another one. Actually, nothing is going on between them, buzzed hearsay. The debate remained endless on the unspoken question everyone has on this impeccable duo: what’s up with these two?

A must read (must re-read for me)! Affectionately shortened to RROJ, this fic brings light on Royai through the eyes of the people who know them

on the brink of discovery by vadeofspades / @mayfieldarc

In which Roy and Riza are trying (and failing) to keep their relationship a secret from Team Mustang on their first day back to Central.

You want to smile? Read this one!

The Amestrian Waltz by raisingmybanner

A story about noticing the things that have been under your nose the whole time, and a story about deciding when to finally let them free. An orange sweater, a shape in the clouds, a protector of the stars. "Who are you?" a little boy asks. "I was your lieutenant," replies a woman with a cracked heart, unsure what else to say.

A tag to give this one? #oh my heart

Partiality by Dailenna / @dairogo

Roy is given the chance to take care of Black Hayate while Riza is in hospital after the Promised Day, and it provokes a lot of thought about changes that could occur.

I'm partial about this one, since it's my gift for last year's Secret Santa, but I loved it, and the hope in it is strong!

Your Warmth Against My Scars by lassus / @lassusog

“How have you been?” his doctor asks him after a moment. “Fine,” Roy responds, calmy. He is, really. Mostly he feels numb. And tired. And his scars hurt, sure. On the whole, nothing out of the ordinary. “Have you been experiencing any pain in the areas with scar tissue?” Every waking moment. But it’s fine. Really. “Not much.” Harris frowns. “I want to help you, you know,” he tells him. “I know,” he brings himself to say. His doctor sighs heavily. “How are things at work?” Harris asks, after a minute. Roy has to look away, suddenly. It doesn’t take long for the numbness to wash over him again though, thankfully. “Fine too.” (Or, Roy's still healing wounds, excessive work and an argument with his Lieutenant slowly take their toll on him.)

Such a great exploration of Roy's character and his stubbornness!

and when you can't rise (i'll crawl with you on hands and knees) by starsinherblood / @jedidragonwarriorqueen

Attacked on their way home from a diplomatic trip to Drachma, General Mustang and Captain Hawkeye find themselves contending with a group of insurgents, but the odds are stacked against them.

I'm feral about this one, about the tension and the angst in it!! It's only 4 chapters long, and I can tell you there's no way to get bored while reading!

For better or worse by zipadeea / @zipadeea

Roy and Riza always thought all they needed to be happy in life was each other. Then, they meet two Ishvalan orphans who teach them just how wrong they are. (Or: Mustang and Hawkeye fall in love and start a family. The process is just as conventional as you'd expect; which is to say, not at all.)

I devoured this fic in one night, and I loved every part of it. It's moving and serious but filled with so much love!

Riza Shaves the Day by sootyfeathers / @sootyfeathers

Soaking wet and out of breath, the pouring rain hadn’t stop Roy from sprinting the entire way to Riza’s apartment in the dead of night. He’s convinced her life is in danger, but it’s really him that needs to be saved. And shaved.

From angst to fluff

[podfic] Never knew I could feel like this by klainelynch / @klainelynch (once again)

After their first kiss, Roy reflects on the depth of his affection for Riza.

Short and sweet, a soft moment for Royai

New Beginning by VillainousMiss / @villainousmiss

A small blurb of Roy and Riza's reactions to a particular order Fuhrer Grumman put into place.

So much hope in this short one-shot!!!

[prince-of-elsinore]

Dear M*A*S*H: S1 Ep 01 “Pilot”

I want to talk about M*A*S*H. The 50-year-old show that, completely unexpectedly, has captured my heart and mind. I finished the series just over one week ago and had to force myself not to immediately begin a rewatch. Now that I’ve had a bit of time to process, though, I’m eager to dive and dig back in, to pick apart what makes this show tick and what made it resonate with me. I want to take my time this go-around (though I expect that will be difficult) and document my thoughts on episodes and characters as the show morphs and grows. I don’t know if I’ll make posts for every episode (that’s a lot) or how long I can keep this up tbh, and I make no promises as to the eloquence or deepness of all my reactions (sometimes you just wanna stare at Mike Farrell’s fuzzy chest amirite). But this show left my brain buzzing with how much there is to talk about and, well, it’s my blog, so here goes.

Korea, 1950: a hundred years ago

What a line to open on. When the show first aired in 1972, it was only 22 years ago. But maybe for audiences jaded by 7 years of direct American entanglement in Vietnam, the first war with moving images broadcast directly into living rooms across the nation, swiftly drawing to an embarrassing and disastrous conclusion, this other war did seem like a hundred years ago. That other, “lesser” war sandwiched between the heroically fought Second World War and the unprecedentedly divisive living nightmare of Vietnam. The supertitle is a simultaneous reminder to the audience of a conflict not often discussed around dinner tables, despite its relative recency (almost as recent to them then as the Iraq War is to us now), and an acknowledgment of how very, very distant it feels. What fascinates me most is how it positions the story we’re about to see as a fable of sorts from a distant time and place, presaging--somewhat paradoxically--the show’s perpetual relevance. This is Korea. It is also every war.

Then, the rest of the cold open. Visual storytelling at its finest! In a brief series of images we glean not only a sense of who our major players are at their cores, but also the notion that at the 4077, not all is as it seems. Two men in Hawaiian shirts playing golf: a familiar sight, until--kaboom, the ball lands in a minefield. A surgeon and nurse work over an unseen patient--oh, no, it’s a bottle of champagne. A man and woman in uniform studiously read a Bible and medical manual--while playing footsie under the table. So, Hawkeye and Trapper are the happy-go-lucky types who don’t see being in a war zone as any reason not to get their kicks where they can; Henry may appear official on the outside (though as we’ll soon see, rarely even that) but really he’s concerned with having a good time with a nurse (it strikes me this could also be an appropriate establishing situation for our two leads, but it’s even more fitting for Henry who is consistently negligent in his duties as Commanding Officer for the sake of sensual indulgence); and Margaret and Frank put on a hypocritical show of military and Christian officiousness while succumbing to their baser desires like anyone else.

Perhaps the implied injunction to look beneath the surface is nothing more than a promise to audiences of what kind of comedy the show will deliver. Perhaps it’s a commentary on the absurdity of life in wartime and under military jurisdiction (people will be people, no matter how many rule books you throw at them). I doubt the show intended this at the time, but I also see an early indication of the ethos that will come to permeate the series: that the truth--and often, our shared humanity--is found in looking closer, not making snap judgments based on superficial features. In any case, this much is clear: your expectations will be subverted. What is familiar becomes foreign, what’s foreign is familiar. It’s a topsy-turvy world. That’s the oldest root of comedy; it’s also war.

“Par is a live patient”

We get Hawkeye’s first “Dear Dad” over our first O.R. scene, conveniently filling us in on the what and why of the 4077 and meatball surgery. It’s also a thesis statement of sorts. They’re there to save lives, not for glory or to be pretty or precious about their work. Life: the number one concern of a doctor, and the number one thing that war takes away. In some ways, a doctor in a war zone is a paradox. This will be Hawkeye’s struggle straight through to the end of the series. He’s more needed here than he could be at any General Practice or stateside hospital, but what the hell is he doing here? He keeps fixing bodies--just enough to keep them clinging to life--only for the war and the army he works for to keep breaking them.

Back at the Swamp, Hawkeye voices a sentiment we’ll often hear repeated over the 11 seasons to come: invite the North and South to a cocktail party. Last one standing wins the war. Here, it’s a throwaway joke, but as we’ll come to see, the tragedy of Hawkeye Pierce is that he simply cannot grasp, cannot accept, how human beings, given the chance to just talk to one another, cannot come to an understanding, or at least an agreement, and settle their differences without resorting to killing.

All right, on to Lieutenant Dish. The scheme to auction off a nurse, even for the good cause of sending Ho-Jon to college in the States, is cringe-inducing today, as is the awkward montage of Hawkeye’s dogged pursuit of the lieutenant. The show’s misogyny, especially in its early seasons, is by far the hardest aspect for me to stomach. If, however, you take what is shown at face-value, as intended, there’s no harm, no foul here. The Dish-Hawkeye dynamic walks a thin line. Yes, she rejects him over and over and he ignores her over and over. Yet, even as she claims to be saving herself for her fiance, Dish seems indulgent towards Hawkeye, and later at the party even flirtatious. So, she enjoys the attention. Convenient and typical of an attractive woman written by and for men. At the same time, it doesn’t take any stretch of imagination to see that flirtation and sex are some of the only outlets available to the women of the camp, and that they could enjoy it just as much as the men.

I do want to know what the hell the plan was with the raffle of the weekend passes. Father Mulcahy winning is simply too convenient. (Incidentally, I feel robbed of seeing William Christopher react to his name being drawn. I’m looking forward to more familiar faces rounding out the supporting cast.)

The party scene also provides the stark juxtaposition of revelry and Hawkeye dancing cheek-to-cheek with his conquest with the sobering reality of their purpose, the raison d’être of the whole camp. To his credit, Hawkeye looks appropriately grave as he informs Margaret that they’ll be operating on a fresh batch of wounded within hours. While the 4077 dances and drinks, Canadian troops are fighting and dying not far off. Not only is this the linchpin of the episode, the get-out-of-jail-free card for Hawkeye and Trapper after all their shenanigans behind Henry’s back, but also a stamp of credibility for so much of the show. How on earth can these clowns get away these schemes, in the army, of all places? Because they are indispensable. Not only are they surgeons, they are the best at what they do. And once again the hypocrisy of army rules and regulations reveals itself; if everything were done by the book, to the letter, the army would cease to function. It would regulate and court martial itself into obsolescence. (Though, as is pointed out more than once in later episodes, would that really be a bad thing?)

Okay, some more thoughts, now as bullet points so I can wrap this up:

I’m watching without the laugh track, and boy is its absence obvious here in a way it never is later on. The pacing is off, much of the comedy wooden. Still, I prefer this subdued, awkward version of the show to the one with the incongruous canned audience. I think watching it this way allowed me to see so much more.

We get a “Come on, Mary” from Hawkeye to Trapper in the first six minutes! And they facetiously, effeminately point their noses in the air in unison as they walk away from Frank. They’re so in sync straight from the start and I love to see it.

I’m so glad the show left these awkward montages and flashbacks (Hawkeye with Dish, Margaret with General Hammond) behind.

Margaret’s limp hair and awful bangs make me sad.

I forgot The Still (tm) is not with us from the start! I assume they build it after Frank breaks their rudimentary barrel gin mill.

Oh, the bucket hat. Odd that it stays with us in the opening credits for the entire series run, when it feels so odd to see Hawkeye wearing it.

Radar is a surprisingly smooth operator here, even devious. He’s no dummy but it’s odd seeing him like this before he became more the wide-eyed innocent kid.

What is the true origin of “Hot Lips”?? Hawkeye calls her that seemingly off the cuff, and her reaction makes it seem like it’s a new nickname. Then Hammond shows up and calls her the same thing. Is this simply a case of Impossible Coincidence Played for Comedy?

I don’t think I got it the first time around that Margaret recognizes the gauze-covered Frank by his butt when she goes to give him the injection. One of the better jokes of the episode imo.

I listened to the Mashcast podcast for the episode and they were puzzled by the use of Japanese covers of popular songs. I assume that this was because Japan was so firmly established as a base of US military operations, a place every G.I. would pass through on their way to Korea, and where they would hope to go for R&R. I assume (but have not done research to confirm) that radio stations they might get would play Japanese tunes like this. The Japanese cover of “Happy Days,” for instance, seems like a nostalgic choice for US servicemen of the era.

Biggest laugh for me: Such a simple moment, but when Hawkeye and Trapper come into Henry’s office and shake hands with a “How are you, Henry?” and he responds, a little wary and knowing, a little sad-sack, “That’s not what you guys came to ask. I mean, the last thing you wanna know when you ask ‘how are you’ is how am I.” God, I really love Henry.

Parting thoughts: In retrospect, the pilot does a better job than I would’ve suspected in setting up not only the characters but also the lasting themes of the show, even while striking a tone a world away from what the show would become. Not a particularly good or funny episode, but it’s rewarding to rewatch and see the pebble drop into the pool, sending out the rings that will reverberate far into the future.

[jeff-the-land-shark]

Okay so my theory (based on the endcredits scene of Black Widow) is that Yelena is going to end up being the initial villain of the Hawkeye series

[lumiolivier]

Fan Fiction Master Post (and Where to Find Them):

Hello, Internet.  It’s been about a year and a half since I last updated my master post and it’d be nice for you to pass this one around instead of the others.  And so much has happened since the last list!  I finally jumped on the Ao3 train!  This list has got everybody here.  If you got nothing better to do and need a little fic to put on the wounds life has dealt you (or if you’re a little bit of a masochist and want something that’ll tear your soul to shreds), then pick a link and indulge yourself, K?  Like last time, this list is organized alphabetically by fandom and chronologically, if there’s a series.  You’ll see what I mean.  Enjoy!

** indicates a story in progress as of the time of posting this list.

Attack on Titan:

Classified Files:  Ackerman, Levi

AU Crack! Hanji needs a favor from Levi, but there's no way Levi would be so willing. That's what she has Eren for! But...Well...Why can't Hanji's experiments ever go right?

Black Butler:

Just a Simple Interview, Right?

1 of 4.  What starts out as just an interview with 19 year old earl Ciel Phantomhive for the paper turns into a little more than that a young reporter bargains for when she meets his enigmatic, yet beautiful butler. (Mostly T rated with some lemon chapters)

His Strange Little Girl and Her Butler, the Enigma

2 of 4.  She had her interview, but gained a few new friends and one very, very special butler. Now, she has her beautiful demon husband for the rest of eternity. But when the honeymoon’s over…is it really over? Of course not. We can’t have anything simple, can we?  (Also T rated with a few lemon chapters.)

You, Me, and Cambion Makes Three

3 of 4.  The Michaelis family has grown by one. The young lord has finally married Lady Elizabeth. So, what comes next? A little catastrophe, perhaps?  (Yet again, T rated with a few lemon chapters.)

Her Butler, One Last Time

4 of 4.  So blissfully living as a magazine contributor in modern day New York City. Until she meets her new landlord…or her demon husband from a past life?

Peace, Love, Unity, Respect

(Mini-series) She’s graduated college. Her boyfriend dumps her. Her roommates find a way to cheer her up. But for whatever reason, she’s feeling a little desperate. Especially when the DJ keeps giving her looks. He feels like he’s seen her somewhere before…

Crossovers:

Trouble Comes in Threes

(Hetalia x Fruits Basket)  Francis, Gilbert, and Antonio could get anyone they want. They're beautiful, they're young, and the whole school knows it. But...They've had it all and grow bored. Even traveling outside city limits wouldn't prove to be any sort of challenge. But after a mess of a party, it appears Yao and Kiku's family tree is extending its roots when their cousins relocate. They couldn't stay at the Sohma house forever.

A New Hacker Has Entered the Chat**

(DRAMAtical Murder x Mystic Messenger) The RFA is usually pretty airtight when it comes to their information. Although, when their systems end up getting hacked, Seven and MC put their heads together to figure out who did it and why their source is coming from two different places. 

DRAMAtical Murder:

His Angel Bunny

When Angel goes into work on her day off, she just wants to throw her head against the wall. Until she sees a cute boy with a face full of metal and a heart full of sadness. She had to do something about it. Little did she know, that would lead to the greatest domino effect adventure of her life.

About Time

Just a quick one-shot of Koujaku doing a HUGE favor to humanity. Thank you, Koujaku, for your bravery and your services.

Death Note:

Lawliet

Ever wonder how L happened? The name? The person? The little boy behind it all…? (child!Lx parental!Reader going into the Kira investigation)

Fairy Tail:

The Princess and the Dragon  

(AU) She wants to be where the wizards are. However, her father has other plans for her. Stay out of the books, Lucy! You don’t need to practice magic! How do you expect to further the bloodline if you don’t meet anyone?

The Siren’s Song

(AU) Beware a frozen heart desperate for warmth...What a load of garbage...Right?

The Knight in Shining Armor (At the time of me posting this, the last chapter is going out this week)

(AU) Erza's flashbacks to the days before she joined the guild kept getting worse and worse. Master Makarov couldn't stand to see one of the strongest members of the guild falling apart like that, so a special job for a special S-Class wizard should be enough to snap her out of it. Especially when that job is for the Fiore royal family.

Fullmetal Alchemist:

Halfmetal Heart

Edward and Winry’s precocious daughter Tricia has picked up the family trade, but when she goes to apply for her state certification, something wonderful catches her eye…

Don’t Forget

Their house used to be a pile of ash, but now, it’s a home as Edward and Alphonse reflect on the day it burned.  One-shot

Happy Birthday, Sir

Today marks a very special day in Amestris. It’s the Fuhrer’s birthday! And his wife has a little something, something planned for him, but can Mustang let it be a surprise?  One-shot.  Partially goes off the Halfmetal Heart canon

The Spark and the Sparrow

Just some young Royai fluff about a thunderstorm that happened at Master Hawkeye’s house.  One-shot

Hetalia:

Candy From Strangers**

Amelia's boyfriend is a jerk. No matter how anyone looks at it, he's a straight up jerk. One night, things got a bit out of hand and...Well...He's her ex-boyfriend now. A broken plate to the cheek does that. But a kind hearted stranger in the park was more than ok with fixing up more than the deep cut on her cheek.

Draw a Circle

France stumbles on a mysterious naked woman and can't keep her to himself, so he consults his good friend Britain. Who is she? And where did she come from?

The Legend of Zelda:

Courageous Duality

Five years after the Kokiri Village has been burned by the Gerudo King’s newest apprentice, Link gathers the intestinal fortitude to go back and pay his respects to his old home. Until he finds his true destiny deep within the Lost Woods.  Takes place after Ocarina of Time

MCU:

Kilgrave’s Good Little Girl

Who better to bring in a murderous psychopath than a murderous psychopath?  (Reader)

Mystic Messenger:

Mistake Messenger

A one-shot collection of alternate routes for Mystic Messenger ranging from sweet and fluffy to naughty and depraved. MC x EVERYONE.

Man’s Best Intern

(AU) Poor Jaehee. Overworked. Underpaid. Under appreciated. Luckily, with the newest C&R intern, anything is possible. Although, when Mr. Han takes a particular shine to her, Jaehee’s workload may be doubled even more.

The Number Next Door**

(AU)  MC has finally gotten the opportunity to move into the apartment building of her dreams. After years of clawing her way up with her design blog, things have finally fallen into place for her. That is, until she learns her next door neighbor likes to blast meme music at 1AM.

Regularly Scheduled Programming

(One-shot) Saeran and MC indulge themselves with one night a week for garbage TV. Although, sometimes, we can't always get what we want.

Ouran High School Host Club:

Kiss, Kiss

1 of 3.  You’re starting at a new school and for any normal person, that’s difficult. For someone with your list of diagnoses, it’s even worse. Especially when all you want is to keep your head down and find a quiet place to study.

Back to Normal, I Guess

2 of 3.  After her summer in New York, Lana goes back to her school in London with her heavy heart full of the memories she made at Ouran Academy. But little does she know, the Ouran Host Club will always be there to welcome her back, no matter what time zone she’s in.

Our New Normal

3 of 3.  Lana misses Japan. Can we blame her? Unfortunately, she had to graduate from Ouran Academy sometime. But her new life in New York with Kyoya is only just beginning. College is an entirely different ballgame.

Switch**

Daddy's only looking out for his little girl and he wants what's best for her. She's not ready to take over the...uh..."family business" quite yet. She doesn't understand why she has to go so far just to go to school. But Daddy's word is law. Hey...Why does the angry guy in her homeroom seem familiar? And what's a host club?

Supernatural:

A Family Forged in Fire

1 of 2.  Lena was living in an orphanage. Constant rejection day in and day out. They were looking for a baby, not her. Little did she know that a case would bring a pair of brothers that would turn her life upside down.

When the Fire Goes Out

2 of 2.  After taking down the devil himself, a girl needs to get away, doesn’t she? Even though it puts her brothers in a worry and opens up a golden opportunity for someone new to slip into her life.

Yuri!!! On Ice:

Adopted

1 of 2.  AU: Victor and Violet adopted two precious little boys that they can’t help but love and became an unorthodox family. Even though the youngest can’t stand the oldest, but that’s the way siblings work. And things get even more troublesome when they both want to take up the very thing that brought Mommy and Daddy together.

Off the Rails

2 of 2.  After Junior Grand Prix, the Nikiforov family has moved to New York and began their training for next season, including Violet’s comeback. However, her comeback may be a bit more than she…or Victor…bargained for.

Not a Perfect Fairytale (But It’s Ours)

Fairytale AU.  Whoever decided the prince needed a princess has terrible foresight…

Surprise

Yurio is always a little paranoid, but for some strange reason, today, his radar was up even more than usual. Especially when Yakov doesn’t yell at him for missing a simple jump.  One-shot

Dr. Nikiforov Has a Ring To It

Getting sick sucks something awful on its own. Getting sick with no one else home but your overbearing roommate to take care of you? That’s a mess in itself.  One-shot

Pierced Through the Heart

(One-shot) Yurio and Otabek had been together a while now. Why couldn't they have something match like Victor and Yuri?

[constantlyirksome]

Are you Cool Enough to Join the Umbrella Academy? (Season 1, no spoiler review.

Have you heard the one about the astronaut, the talking monkey and the violinist? Last week Netflix released it’s newest superhero offering, “The Umbrella Academy,” originally an indie comic written by Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance fame. Published by Dark Horse Comics, this is one of the first adaptions from an independent publisher, untethered to the Marvel or DC cinematic universe. Publishers aside The Umbrella Academy has enough unique style and story element to attract anyone suffering from SHFF (SuperHero Film Fatigue.) The story revolves around a family of six siblings, born across the globe to mothers who weren’t pregnant the day before, who all possess certain super human talents. Brought together by a careless billionaire scientist who wanted to build an army of super children, the now estranged siblings have to come together once again when their dear old dad kicks the bucket. As family secrets are revealed, tensions between the group become palpable, as they struggle to deal with past traumas, while trying to come together to save the world from a deadly fate. For the most part the six siblings are all very unique, from both each other and a lot of the other types of heroes you’d see from the Big Two studio. There’s Luther (Tom Hopper), an astronaut with super human strength. Alison (Emmy Raver-Lapman) is a glamorous movie star, who has built her life using her power to persuade others to do what she wants. Diego is an expert knife thrower who still moonlights as a vigilante. Klaus (Robert Sheehan), the family’s black sheep, is a drug addict who can talk to dead people. Vanya (Ellen Page) is the only sibling with no evident superpowers and is told by her father often and at length that she is nothing special. Number 5 is a time and space traveller who disappeared when the group were little, and he reappears in the present, looking just like the 13 year old who disappeared decades earlier. There was a seventh sibling, Ben (Justin H. Min) who died mysteriously while 5 was absent, and is now a ghost who can only talk to Klaus. He was the strongest, able to conjure ancient beasts from his skin to smash up bad guys. The central plot revolves around an upcoming apocalypse prophesized by five to happen in one week. Sometimes this main plot point becomes a little thin in early episodes as the siblings are distracted with their own troubles, and a clear way forward isn’t really established until mid way through. The second half pushes forward hard and fast as the apocalypse approaches, and relationships begin to splinter. While the first few episodes lack clear purpose they act as a good six origin stories, which help the season feel like both a beginning, there’s enough action and intent to make it a possible stand alone if there are no more seasons. As superpowers go the group have a pretty stacked deck. In a team there are usually a few cool powers and a few trained assassins, or a super genius. The members of the Academy however are all strong, powers honed by their strict father to be the perfect weapons. Super strength isn’t anything new but Luther makes up for it with a super ego and a super sense of self-importance. Diego is the Hawkeye of the group power wise personally if I had siblings who could conjure the dead or teleport, throwing knives would seem pretty lame. Each sibling carries on their own side story, the outlines how their powers have in some way or another ruined their lives. Obviously Ben had it the worst because he, well, died but most of the others have highly compelling stories. Alison used her powers on too many wrong people, leaving her personal life in shambles. Klaus, so haunted and terrorised by the dead, had to take up drugs to drown out the noise. Number 5 was ripped away from his family and spent, let’s just say, a lengthy amount of time trying to get back, and is now being hunted down by time cops Cha-Cha (Mary J Blige) and Hazel (Cameron Britton.) Diego and Luther however lack any sort of story worth getting teary over. Perpetual man children who never grew out of wanting to be the hero, they spend much of the season bickering, swinging their metaphorical dicks around and generally not helping the situation. While David Casteñeda does an admirable job of injecting Diego with some much needed heart, Luther’s character falls flat in almost every category. You almost want to root against him the way he mistreats people and feels sorry for himself. (Fake looking muscles and a weird sub-plot with incestuous undertones don’t help at all. Technicalities or no, the uncomfortable relationship between Luther and Allison is creepy and makes both characters slightly off-putting. While Aidan Gallagher plays Number five with a perfect mix of teenage snark and a world weariness that comes only after you’ve seen some shit, it’s Page and Sheehan who carry much of the seasons emotional heavy lifting. Sheehan, known mainly for his roll as the scene stealing Nathan from the show Misfits, once again steals the show as Klaus. Kooky yet troubled, hilarious yet haunted, the actor is mesmerising as he stumbles, high usually, through life. Without knowing his full backstory you can tell, through glances or certain lines, that this character is deeply disturbed, and not just a token junkie. He also is one half of the most touching, if not woefully under-developed, relationships toward the end of the series as Number 5’s time hopping shenanigans start to affect his siblings. Ellen Page, (think Juno) as Vanya is the character most grounded in reality, having grown up “normal” Page is perfect as a tired, shunted sister, the perfect person to stand in the middle of some of the seasons juicer plot points. Having written a book about her mistreatment as a child, Vanya is alienated from the rest of the family, is while sometimes morose also very raw. Page wearily moves through scenes with characters that are far whackier, but still holds her own. When the main story focuses, and Vanya takes centre stage, her inner turmoil and fractured relationships make for some of the seasons most gripping scenes. The world in which the siblings live is bleak, grimy and wild. Most scenes take place in run down diners or hotels, or in the decaying facades of the family mansion, with just enough colour and intrigue to keep the show from becoming depressing or drab. During flashback scenes the group, as children, wear matching school uniform in a kooky, Tim Burton like house. There are scenes on the moon, in glamorous Hollywood events, and gnarly apocalyptic wastelands that keep the settings fresh. The influence of comic writer Gerard Way comes through in the children’s uniforms, the matching black umbrellas and the architecture of the mansion, you can sometimes see how the comic was created by the same man who sang the Black Parade. Costuming does an excellent job chiselling out the identities of the siblings. The glamorous Allison in her red carpet dresses, the unassuming Vanya in her drab denims, and he badass Diego who wears all black. However, Klaus beats them all, as in every scene he’s wearing a new whacky ensemble, perfectly matching feminine and masculine, none of the pieces like skirts, flowy jackets or crop tops seemingly go together, but it works. Cha-Cha and Hazel steal their costumes straight out of Fortnite, the contrast between their cop uniforms and their giant animal head helmets is hilarious and unsettling. While the plot sometimes stretches a little thin between characters, The Umbrella Academy succeeds in breaking the traditional superhero tropes by imbuing the characters with more depth, personality beyond gruff tortured crusaders, and individual styles that both ground them, and elevate them so that they remain sympathetic. Not out as actual heroes since their teens, their humanity makes every fight or drama more climactic. As the apocalypse comes closer and the tension builds, it’s never actually certain that the siblings will actually win against whatever or whoever causes the apocalypse. The future of the show, whether it will get renewed or not, and the future of the world may remain uncertain it’s definitely worth exploring the futures of each of these characters. How will they and their powers grow? Will we ever find out how Luther got to the moon? Why was their dad such a dick? Watch this new season and you will definitely want to find out. Also their butler is a talking monkey named Pogo.

[honeylikewords]

I am freaking out over all the Marvel news out of Comic Con. You?

Honestly, when I first got this ask, I was going to answer “no” because I legitimately hadn’t heard anything from Marvel at all. All I knew was that we were in for a bunch of Disney+ shows like Loki, which I wasn’t interested in, and Falcon and Winter Soldier, which I am interested in but concerned about.

But then I did a quick Google, and saw that there’s plenty of other stuff to be excited about, so here’s a listicle-style breakdown of what I am and am not excited for, as was released in the press junkets regarding the SDCC Marvel Hall H panel.

1. Black Widow: Nope, not interested. Way, way back in 2012, I might have cared, given that Natasha was LITERALLY THE ONLY WOMAN in the MCU with any agency or hero role, but now that we have significantly more women, significantly more interesting women, and women of color (who aren’t played by white women stealing roles from actual WOC lmao), I think we don’t really... need a Black Widow movie. I mean, cool that David Harbour will be in it, but, uh... yeah, count me out of that one.

2. Falcon and Winter Soldier: Yeah, I’m excited for this one! Anthony Mackie and Sebastian Stan have a lot of fun chemistry, and I hope the series plays up the fun buddy-cop aspect of their relationship rather than “doom and gloom, Steve is gone, boohoo” stuff. They deserve to be heroes in their own rights and to not live in Steve’s shadow. Also, I’m not hugely into Bucky Barnes (I kinda find him boring, sorry) so I hope the series will, at least a little, start to endear me more to him. But I am very excited to see Sam getting more screentime!

3. Eternals: Eh, can’t really say. I don’t know enough about the original Eternals, nor do I have any information about who the new Eternals will be to weigh in. Ask me again when we’re closer to the release date.

4. Shang-Chi And The Legend Of The Ten Rings: Honestly, some warning flags are popping up for me on this one. Much as I want more POC led MCU films (and just, fucking, like, any films in general), Marvel comics has a pernicious history surrounding Asian fetishism and mysticism. I’ve talked about it before with my hatred for Iron Fist, and the problems Marvel had during the big “Asian Craze” of the 60s and 70s, but I really do worry about re-adapting works based in and rooted in the comics made during those times. I don’t know enough about Shang-Chi’s origins to weigh in just yet, but I am on high-alert about how this could go wrong. Hopefully, though, with actual Asian and POC actors involved in the project, it will be done tastefully and respectfully. Hopefully.

5. WandaVision: Nah. I never liked either character to begin with so I’m not really gonna waste my brainspace on some TV show about a random white girl and her toaster boyfriend. I know that sounds mean but I have a lot of pent up anger about how the MCU depicted the Maximoffs, given that the Maximoffs were originally Jewish and survivors of the Hol*caust, but then somehow the MCU decided to make them not only white, but white people working with a literal N*zi organization. So I have beef with that, and I just... don’t care about Wanda or Vision. They haven’t been with us long enough for any of us to really, you know, see them have arcs or be meaningful people. They’re just kinda there. So no thanks. Maybe if the show turns out to be great, I’ll watch, but as it stands, I’m uninterested.

5. Doctor Strange: Multiverse Of Madness: Eh. I never saw the original Doctor Strange because of the whitewashing issues and Benedict Cumberbatch’s, shall we say, history of anti-autism comments and classist perceptions about poor and undereducated people, so I just noped out of that. But I also didn’t like Stephen Strange from what I saw in the other MCU films I have seen him in, so I don’t feel like I’m missing much. If this movie turns out to be cool (apparently, it’s going to be the MCU’s first “scary” film, whatever that means?), I might see it, but for now it’s largely off my radar.

6. Loki: Nnnnnnnnnot especially excited. As I’ve said before, I like Ragnarok Loki, and that’s about it. 2012 Loki was, no joke, literally set up as a N*zi, and y’all know how I feel about N*zis. I’m not being hyperbolic. He is literally supposed to be equitable to a N*zi. So I’m disappointed that we’ve regressed all of his character development back in time to his worst stage, and we’re going to be seeing that play out in his show. Hopefully, the directors allow Tom Hiddleston to have more fun with Loki, because holy shit does Tom have great comedic timing, and I hope we get some redemption for Loki, because as it stands, I feel sad and hurt that they just threw away everything Loki grew into being. And if you’re one of those salty “Loki is a Classy, Intelligent, Sexy Villain, And Ragnarok Made Him DUMB, Give Us Back Our King” fans, please leave me alone. He was gross and greasy and weird and Ragnarok made him funny and likable, in me humble onion. Also, Loki is canonically not straight, not cisgender, and has been pregnant with horse babies, so, uh, let’s all just chill out and have some fun.

7.  What If...?: The What If...? comics can be really confusing and fun, alternatingly. So it’ll be interesting to see how this show manifests itself to match the wild, changing, freewheeling chaos of the What If...? storylines. Let’s see what happens!

8. Hawkeye: FUCK I AM SO MAD THAT THIS ISN’T AN ANIMATED SERIES BASED ON THE HAWKEYE COMICS THAT CAME OUT RECENTLY. FUCK. I would have loved that! But instead we’re getting Ronin Hawkeye (which sounds so dumb and also question-mark-y racist?). At least we’ll be getting Kate Bishop, I guess. C’est la vie. Not a fan of the Jeremy Renner Hawkeye, tbh, so I don’t know how this show will keep my interest, but fingers crossed.

9. Thor: Love and Thunder: BUCKLE UP BOYS I FINALLY HAVE A MOVIE TO CARE ABOUT YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAW AMEN PRAISE GOD WE HAVE A GOOD MOVIE COMING YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FEMALE THOR AAAAAAAAAAAAA GAY RIGHTS YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

FUCK! I AM SO HAPPY OH MY G O D!

10. Blade: YEE FUCKING HAW! Mahershala Ali has been in the MCU three times now (1st as Cottonmouth in Luke Cage, 2nd as Uncle Aaron in ITSV, and now as Blade!) and I’m both pleasantly surprised and a little confused, since the MCU very rarely reuses actors. Oh, well! I’m so happy to see him back and I hope Blade does him justice. I worry that the original Blade (comics and movie alike) were a little, uh, Blaxploitation-y, so I hope this update will be more thoughtful and more progressive in its depictions. But at the end of the day, this is one I’ll be watching.

11. Fantastic Four: I’m worried but hopeful. The last swings at making a Fantastic Four film have been, um, mixed to say the least. Fingers crossed for a diverse set of characters this time! Although I do think that David Harbour being in the Black Widow movie does rule him out of being The Thing, as was previously speculated. Well, anyway, here’s hoping it’s good.

12. Black Panther 2: SHIT BOI DO I DIE I AM READY YES YES YES YESSSSS 

But please for the love of GOD bring back Ryan Coogler to direct. I don’t trust this story in the hands of, well, non-black people, especially because the story of Black Panther is so intrinsically tied to the black experience. That being said, I’m ready and excited for a return to Wakanda and to see what is next in T’Challa’s saga. Also, please, more Shuri, more Nakia, more Okoye. Honestly, Black Panther brought us some of the best women in the MCU so just... bring back all the ladies. Ramonda too!

13. Guardians of the Galaxy 3: I’m a little nervous about this one re: the issues surrounding the firing of James Gunn (which is, like, such a can of worms to get into), but fingers crossed. The GOTG films are really fun and such a great break from the rest of the dull, painfully self-absorbed MCU, so I hope that the light-hearted tone and center on found family comes back. I also hear that this one will be more female-centric (focusing on Gamora, I believe?) so that’s good to hear!

14. Captain Marvel 2: I didn’t see the first one, but, hey, my lesbian friends sure are happy to have Carol back so you’ve got my approval on that one, Marvel.

15. Mutants: DOES THIS MEAN...MCU X-MEN...I’M SCARED...SOMEONE HOLD ME

16. This one technically isn’t MCU but it’s what I’m most excited for...

THE SPIDERMAN 2099 COMICS ARE COMING BACK!

I’M SO HAPPY I GET TO SEE MY BOY MIGGY AGAIN I AM SO SO SO SO HAPPY OH MY GOD I WAS SO SCARED THEY’D PERMANENTLY CANCELLED MIGGY BUT HE’S HOME I GET TO SEE HIM AGAIN I COULD JUST C R Y AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

anyway, that’s just what I’m excited for. Y’all tell me if I missed anything or if there’s other updates or news! Or tell me what you’re excited for-- I’d love to hear!

[metalgearkong]

Avengers: Endgame - Review

5/6/19 **SPOILERS**

Directed by Joe & Anthony Russo (Marvel Studios/Disney)

The original Iron Man came out a year after I turned 18 and graduated high school. Effectively, the Marvel Cinematic Universe began as soon as I started my adult life, each film acting like 2 or 3 checkpoints every year, always giving me something to look forward to. While I haven’t loved or liked every movie so far, the MCU has been incredibly consistent, slowly increasing in quality on average as time goes on, not to mention having that sentimental factor of facing the world along side it. Scale has also increased in these films over time, seeing more and more team-up movies with larger and larger casts crammed on screen. Endgame is the biggest super hero movie of all time, and not just based on box office earnings, but based on fan expectations, concluding such an incredible saga.

The Russo brothers have been a godsend to the MCU, directing what are most of the top tier entries so far, including The Winter Soldier, Civil War, Infinity War, and now Endgame. While Infinity War was essentially Thanos’ story, Endgame shifts perspective back to the heroes, picking up the pieces and desperately trying to undo what Thanos accomplished. Endgame is sometimes overwhelming (in a good way), with several instances catching myself holding my breath. One of the best things about this film is the level of pay-off it gives for those who have followed the series since the beginning. While I don’t think I enjoyed it more than Infinity War, Endgame is certainly one of the biggest super hero movies of all time, but sometimes the logic of the story detracts from the emotion and memorable moments of the film.

The movie picks up 5 years after Thanos’ genocide. The remaining Avengers discover a possibility to use the quantum realm (Ant-Man’s shrinking machines) to go back in time and collect the infinity jewels before Thanos does. While this is a “time travel” movie, I like the explanation that Bruce Banner gives that you simply cannot just go back to an earlier time and change the current present; going back in time is like visiting an alternate dimension where what you do does affect that timeline, but yours when you go back continues as its been. This essentially takes care of the “grandfather paradox” of why you couldn’t just go to the past, kill Hitler, changing history for the better. You could tell the writers of this film anticipated question most theater-goers would ask, like “why not just go back and kill Thanos as a baby?” and things like that. 

After being rescued from space by Captain Marvel, Tony Stark has officially retired from being an Avenger. He understandably has lost the battle, and resides to live his life with Pepper Potts and their 5 year old Morgan. Tony’s home life and dynamics with his daughter are some of my favorite moments in the movie, as it further humanizes Tony, and offers even more deconstruction of super heroes this series is known for. When the other Avengers think of a possible way to fix everything, I actively wanted them to leave Tony alone and let him have his earned life of peace, even if half the universe was killed off. But, being the guilty genius he is, he can’t fully let it go, and works with quantum tech to make a time machine for the heroes to use. Quickly, they develop a plan to split off and go to different teams and time periods, and retrieve the infinity jewels from their original known locations.

Seeing the current Avengers physically revisit famous scenes from prior movies was incredibly satisfying and felt like an appropriate use of fan service. Some of the best scenes of the entire movie are current heroes accidentally meeting up with themselves in the past, or accidentally coming across people they miss dearly. One of the scenes that come to mind are Steve Rogers meeting his younger self during the events of The Avengers (2012), and the ensuing duel. It instantly reminded me of playing a fighting game with your friend, but you’ve both picked the same character. It was one of the most and creative and clever moments of the movie. The other best time travel moment easily goes to Tony revisiting the 1940′s and having a hear to heart with his unwitting father, getting closure and a feeling for full circle his character didn’t even know he needed.

One one the complaints I do have about the story is that Thanos is no longer the same Thanos from Infinity War. When problems emerge during Nebula’s trip to the past, Thanos from that time period learns that someday he is successful in using the infinity jewels to wipe out half the universe. Through convoluted events, he is able to travel to the future (Endgame’s present) where he faces the Avengers head-on for trying to spoil his plans. This means the Thanos of this film (B) isn’t the same Thanos as in Infinity War (A), as he hasn’t done anything from those events yet, nor has any history with the heroes. Thanos B also seems to have a more malevolent and less complex attitude about using the infinity jewels, and comes off more as a typical bad guy, and less of a complex emotional psychopathic environmentalist, which is what made his character so interesting in the first place.

The other major issue I have with the film is its seemed to shoot itself in the foot with all the time travel multiverses. The movie feels like it breaks its own rules for the sake of the big emotional character scene at the very end. I’m of course referring to “Old Cap” and how he somehow went back to the past to live out his life with Peggy Carter, yet was able to show up back in Endgame’s timeline as an aged man to pass off his shield to Falcon. Once he went into the past, he, by this movie’s own rules, cannot appear back in the regular timeline because visiting the past is basically a parallel universe. What makes it doubly bad is that it’s not in Cap’s character to simply allow the world to go through the turmoil it did while standing aside through all of it. Don’t even get me started on how this would have affected Peggy’s life and the entire conception of SHIELD. If someone can explain to me how this was all possible, please do, otherwise, it felt like either a genuine mistake, or more likely, the movie bending its own rules for the sake of a payoff (which left me scratching my head and took the emotional impact completely out of the final scene of the movie).

However, I’m extremely happy with the rest of Captain America’s scenes. Aside from the scene mentioned earlier (Cap vs. Cap), his use of Thor’s hammer in the end battle was incredibly satisfying and cathartic. I’ve always felt that if anyone was “worthy” of being a good person and warrior, it was always Captain America. Why he could barely budge Thor’s hammer in Avengers: Age of Ultron is beyond me (unless he was faking it to protect Thor’s feelings). Hell, if Vision could lift the hammer, why couldn’t Cap before now? Cap also gets a lot more time on screen in general, which was nice after barely having any lines or presence in Infinity War. Hawkeye, Black Widow, and other side characters also get their best moments of the entire series combined, and it was nice to see the regular people among the Avengers still have emotionally and plot poignant scenes as good as the super heroes.

Thor’s story arch could be seen as criticisms of the film as well. While the universe in its throws of coping with half of all life disintegrated, and how that would affect hugely every aspect of life, Thor meanwhile settles for comically getting fat and doing absolutely nothing. While I still found Thor in-character and funny in this film, upon further speculation, I really wish Thor continued the high he rode after passing what was his darkest chapter in Infinity War. I thought Thor finally settled into his own, and was confused why he regressed into a gag, even if I found it humorous at first. But, I was thankful certain other characters didn’t steal the limelight, especially Captain Marvel. I still find her way too powerful and her personality wildly unlikable and inconsistent. I tried to defend her character in her own movie back in March, but seeing Brie Larson once again strutting her ego made it impossible to root for a supposed underdog. One of my greatest fears of Endgame is she’d use her power to steal the show, and overshadow the legacy of the original characters in their fight against Thanos.

Summing up every great scene or character moment in this review is impossible, and they certainly outnumber the scenes or concepts I disliked. Almost every character gets some resolution or moment in the spotlight by the end of the movie. The final words of Tony Stark, “I am Iron Man,” was a triumphant moment as it capped off the entire series so far, further establishing Tony Stark as the heart and soul of the MCU. While Tony has never been my favorite Avenger, Endgame pays huge respects to him and his accomplishments, and I was a bigger fan of him than I ever was before. Its too bad that the plot raises so many questions in my mind, especially related to time travel and alternate dimensions. Endgame has too many conveniences for the sake of a big bombastic super hero climax, and I wish some of the logical issues with the plot or characters could have been executed differently. If you have any affinity for this series, you owe it to yourself to see Endgame, and while it has many moments of pay-off and awe, it isn’t the series’ most airtight film.

8/10

[valentineblaze]

Endgame Spoilers

Listen up people I am here to rant.

Tony Stark is effing amazing and I love every second of his gilded trashbag life. But this was just a killer. Dad Tony was everything I wanted and more let me tell ya. I love you 3000 is freaking heartbreaking. I have no issue with his arc in the movie at all even if the end does cause me to break out into back breaking sobs because fuck you. If Tony is going to die by gauntlet then you had better be damn sure everyone he even peripherally gave a damn about is going to make it through this fight. Natasha, Gamora, Loki, and every single Asgardian Tony could remember would have been brought back because that man is the definition of all or nothing.

What I have issues with is the sheer lack of world building we get in this movie. Honestly its the Snap and the only glimpse of this Post apocalyptic world is group Therapy and Remembrance walls. As well as several miscellaneous flashbacks to Hawk-eyes surprise family? That not even comic fans are super attached too because they were literally made up probably for male man pain. Where was the atmosphere? Where was the drama? Where was the angst? Post snap was quite honestly not heart wrenchingly rendered into a suitable level of grief. It just wasn't. I expected break downs and rage. All I got was three seconds of Natasha tears as she has let someone else tracking down her soulbro. And a Tony Stark screaming at Captain America. This movie just told us what was happening didn't show us what was happening. It was piss poor story boarding.

Then there was the character development. Like wow. We get all these new and amazing side characters in which you could have fleshed out and made us root for and you just throw them to the sea like chum. -Captain marvel is just not there at all, she gets a gratuituous girl power scene which was random and then she gets slapped to the ground never to get up? Right after she take a head butt without a single flinch. You can small Thanos's fear right then. -Rocket gets to slap Thor? Thats it thats his most memorable moment other the holding Nebula's hand. -Rhodey has some of the best lines but no development or follow up. -Nebula there is so much happening off screen that it physically hurts me. She is amazing. I adore her. I want a series of her. Nebula is my bitch bea. I found a new hoe to die for and it is she. She is my new ride or die. Found family and redemption arcs come at me. -Sam and Bucky both get maybe two lines a piece and that just irks me.

Time travel... yes bitch I am always there for time travel hijinks and drama but honestly five minutes of a single episode of leverage had more heist feels then this three hour train wreck. It might have been the lack of a great soundtrack but it just wasn't that compelling to watch. I'm also really confused about the time travel thearory in this shit because they kept going back on thier own writing through out the movie (cough cough STEVE cough) I'm a fan of we rewrite the future by affecting the past. Butterfly effect is my Jam. This alternate reality thing is fun yes but it can't really be that because they may create alternate realities okay? then if there was the need for pym particals for time travel to occur how did Thanos's big ass army get enough to travel through time to the future? Because the avengers were out or at least low regardless of Steve's thievery and Nebula only had the one from my understanding. Also if changing the reality makes a new reality how the fuck was Steve in this reality.

Bruce , Bruce, Bruce. My beautiful green rage monster and yoga doctorate what have they done to you. What is going on. Why are you so cheerful. Why are you at peace. I hate to say it but go back. Why are we still doing this Nat/Bruce ship? It is so random. I just can't see it. Fandom can trick me into it for a few chapters but not forever.  Ya'll should have taken a hint from Ragnorok give me that personality and it would have been a win. Shock and dismay was my only emotions when it came to this mess.

My constant rage with this series is pick up an effin comic book. Sit down watch a cartoon. If anyone is going to become a human disaster post Snap its going to be effin Hawkeye. Like yay Ronin cool but what the actual fuck. Why did you come at me like that? Hawkeye is not your edgy overlord. He probably would have died ages ago with out the female influences in his life. He has regular dates with dumpsters.  I'm sure he even has a ranking system for prefered dumpsters to end up in after a beat down. Yes he is startlingly competent but even he doesn't know how he does it half the time. He eats food off the floor and thinks expiration dates are guidelines.

Thor was a new one. They threw me for a loop. One this man needs a hug. Two, why is no one hugging him? His rampant depression and weight gain shouldn't have been the butt of jokes. There should have been some honest concern and meaningful conversations with the living not the dead. Thor never doubted his mother's love. That was never up for debate. Thor is not to blame for the snap. Thor will give no fucks if he messes up the timeline if it means his family is alive and together. Especially post Ragnarok. Also I could have sworn Thanos killed every asguardian on his ship at the beginning of infinity war? How is Valkyrie alive? Why would Thor decide to go to space?

I’m not even gonna touch on the Black Widow for this one. I’m just not gonna go there. Blind rage doesn’t even cover it.

Howard Stark. Wow just wow I thought I was having some weird ass delusion. That man is scum. Comic canon scum. One of the smartest men on the planet yes, revolutionary war hero technically yes, great father and overall good human being? Hell to the no. Tony literally named his A.I. after Jarvis, cried over the death of J.A.R.V.I.S,  I would have expected a quiet chat about fatherhood and marriage and how it can make the best out of any man (he hopes)  before I got a conversation with dear old dad.

Why can’t Tony and Steve have one friendly conversation? A sense of camaraderie? Anything? Why is that so hard?

Steve "fight me" Rogers what has MCU done to you? I'm supposed to believe that you would have left Bucky Barnes to Hydra's hands for over 70 years. Im supposed to believe that you would have been in the past and had no interactions with Howard Stark. Im supposed to believe that the you married the Director of Shield and you didn't wax poetry about the amazing woman that diegned to marry you every damn day of your life? This woman on her deathbed told you she lived a long and fulfilled life and that you should move on to have the same happiness as she and you did what? That he wouldn't have dismantled every last bit of Hydra. That he would just let Natasha and Tony die because of that shitty delusional grape? The disrespect STEVEN the disRESPECT! I am a Stony stan for sure but hell if I don't respect Peggy Carter. So yay steve gets his happy cis gendered ending but what about the rest of em?