#i kinda stopped playing fgo but i still love him

[lamouratorrrrry]

kinchan

[lowres-masamune]

SLBP x FGO AU??

hear me out guys. slbp lords as fate servants fellow fgo players where y'all at -eye emoji- I came up with this like 4 months ago and suddenly remembered it while brushing my teeth this morning so here we go this is the crossover event that no one asked for but we all deserve it.

I've only thought about their servant classes, but I had a lot of fun with it so there'll be more to come soon I've just been really busy for the past few weeks :( under a read more bc it got very long

(this is purely based on SLBP's depictions of them!)

Nobunaga — Ruler

Well I can't choose Archer for obvious reasons dammit. I know he isn't fair and etc like a Ruler normally is, but I thought it would be interesting because in SLBP he is shown to be a good lord who cares about the people below him and wants to change things for the better so that works I guess? And also imagine his ascension in FGO where he could go from either his act 1 self to his unification self or the other way round depending on how you want to depict him. interesting.

Mitsuhide — Caster or Saber

Mostly because I didn't really see him fitting into the other classes? but I feel like in a HGW he could still fight pretty well but he'd be more of a strategist type of servant.

Yukimura — Berserker

I was gonna go with Lancer at first because he has a big spear of his skill with a spear. But the story does mention that all his talk of dying in battle with honour etc is very excessive, and even makes other characters question his sanity. Berserker would also be a great fit for him because he would do anything to train and get stronger, and he would unhesitatingly give up his life for his lord, Shingen who he is almost blindly loyal to.

Saizo — Assassin

Pretty obvious choice, no comment.

Masamune — Saber

I didn't know where else he fits, and he is also mentioned to be a master of mine-uchi, a supposedly very difficult katana technique. Well he is good at a bunch of things in the story, but I think he'd fit best in Saber class <3

Kojuro — Saber

I feel like he could be a Caster as well, but he's the one who taught Masa all those sword techniques so I guess it made sense to have him here.

Inuchiyo — Lancer or Berserker

Because he uses his spear a lot ofc. And he is pretty reckless but he's also really strong like most Berserkers.

Ieyasu — Archer

I'm just gonna go with archer because I see his in game sprite has a bow. I think he could fit into assassin class but idk.

Mitsunari — Caster

He would be a great caster, but probably a pain to work with at first if you're not Hideyoshi.

Hideyoshi — Ruler

Because he definitely seems like one, personality-wise. I can really see him being the ruler in a HGW hehe

Shingen — Rider

An obvious choice because he's great at horse riding and he has the best cavalry in the land. He could fit into all the other normal classes except for caster and assassin but I needed some variety. Plus imagine him hanging out with all the other really cool riders like Drake hehehehe they would be good friends. also imagine him with his horse Kurokumo in his NP hnnngggg

Kenshin — Berserker

he could fit into most of the classes but I think this one kinda fits his reputation as the god of war. plus it would be interesting bc he does not look like a berserker at all. also bc he literally goes mad when he sees nice things and he will bring them home and no one can stop him (he is so relatable). he is so chaotic but we all love him. ALSO this means that he and Shingen will have a class advantage over each other HUHuHUHU so they will keep fighting each other and none really has the upper hand over the other; they will still remain rivals even as servants.

Shigezane — Saber

I don't know where else he'd fit either, and it just felt right to put him here idk.

I don't really know anything about Nobuyuki soz guys

imagine Nobunaga and Kenshin meeting their fgo counterparts

sorry this ended up being so long haha but I hope y'all enjoyed it. I haven't played enough of the Shadow routes yet to write about the ninja characters tho but the time will come. I haven't played all of the lords' routes yet so tell me if I might have misinterpreted something! feel free to add on <3

[ac-liveblogs]

i haven’t played the new event but I do agree with you that Mondsadt characters are generally written better. Like out of the archons, while I do love Zhongli, i will admit it more due to being starved from guys in fgo than his character. And I could care less about raides since they butchered her arc and stuck all the interesting pieces in lore rather than showing us. But Venti I could see how him being the god freedom would affect the way he acts as archon but is still willing to be there when it counts. And despite being an absentee archon his people are genuinely happy. And out of nations leaders, while the overworked girlboss is overused for Jean it works cuz its not considered cute on her and there’s like actual affects on people around her like her relationship with Barbara and her friends worrying about her. But honestly I think out of what the nations represent Mondstadts characters represent freedom the most. Also I think they’re allowed to be more goofy than other characters. Meanwhile Liyues characters are good but I think they shine a little better on their own, they don’t play off each other the same way Mondstadts. either way really wish the other nations would stop ragging on Mondstadt since the writing made it a whole lot easier to care about mondstadt then the other two.

FGO really is quality over quantity these days, huh? And then they have the audacity to not let you roll Michael and Takasugi. (maybe next year.)

I find that Mondstadt is more grounded in general. The 'freedom' theme is very well integrated into Mondstadt's city and lore (and a lot less nebulous than 'contracts' and 'eternity'), and there seems to be a... better sense of what the characters are about, at least for the 'core' cast (Jean, Diluc, Kaeya, Lisa, Amber, Venti, etc - I think Eula and Albedo are the most dubious).

What I like about the Mondstadt cast is... yeah, they're kinda messy, aren't they? There's a sense of drama here that's absent in Liyue and Inazuma, where most (MOST) characters are pretty well adjusted. I LIKED seeing Diluc and Kaeya get snippy at each other over Diluc selling Crepus' mansion, and Kaeya's unsubtle desperation to reconnect. Jean getting annoyed at being dragged away from her work. Eula getting smashed, and is jealous and bitter of the Traveller's ability to make friends. I liked Albedo being a bitch in the Archipelago! I like that Jean can't control Klee, and that Kaeya is a bad influence! I like that Crepus wasn't a great dad, I like that Diluc is a trainwreck human that can't deal with loss, I like that Venti's approach to being an Archon is fueled by trauma, and that had real bad effects on Mondstadt in the long run!

But because of that, these characters feel just that bit more rounded, you know? They have problems. They're messy. They're not perfect people. They screw up. There are consequences for that. I... don't feel this approach, like they're genuinely flawed characters, in other regions. Keqing has burnout, but don't worry - she already knows and is working on it! Zhongli never did anything wrong, ever, in his life (fuck azhdaha tho)! Ei didn't actually do a bad thing, everyone forgave her and doesn't blame her (it was Kazuha's friend's fault he died anyway!) Ningguang and Beidou are flawless Girlbosses! Shenhe and Ganyu's problems are fixed now!

Like, are there flaws in other region's characters that the game is willing to point out and take seriously? The game doesn't seem to think Xiao grinding himself to the bone is a problem (thanks Lantern Rite 2.0), Itto's troublesome nature has been framed as noble OR a joke, Beidou's bitchiness towards Ningguang reads more as the writer's not being to manage their dynamic, Yae's bitchiness isnt treated as a flaw and... I can't think of anything else off the top of my head that actually reads as intentional and not just... writing choices that weren't thought through very well. Hell, they even do damage control on CHILDE!

But because these characters are flawed and messy (intentionally so), I feel like they get less respect overall? I remember people being happy that Eula was soooo mature about her family, but that just meant she'd had part of her character arc off-screen and, to me, that made her a less dynamic character. So I was really pleased to see her so blatantly unhappy in this event! It means she still has growing to do, and her issues are tangibly causing problems onscreen! Because that's what you want from characters, right? For them to grow and become better and overcome challenges? Not for them to be perfect out of the box?

anyway stan mondstadt

[hasspartacusdoneanythingwrong]

The Flame-Soaked City, Part 5

With CasCu joining them, the master triad and co. head deeper into the heart of the Fuyuki singularity. What will they uncover as they approach the source of the altered history? (I mean if you play FGO you probably know this already, but hush. We’re hyping up the mystery here!)

TW: implied body horror, villain that would hurt a child, Lev Lainur

If it’s between <triangle brackets>, that’s a mental note between masters, and if it’s between {whatever these are} it’s the viewpoint character.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

{Jeanne}

With the arrival of the new caster, we not only gained a powerful ally, but knowledge about this singularity. What started as a Holy Grail War quickly became a fight for survival as the Saber converted the other servants to her side somehow.

Spartacus was very happy to find out there was a "tyrant" taking control of the situation. If it means he will actually help us from here on out we won't fight it. The best news however is that our caster friend knows healing magic! We're so close to being able to see again!

Kat: <Hey Jeanne, why are you saying all that stuff that just happened?>

Jeanne: <Because Cris never pays attention, and we don't need them getting lost next time they front.>

Cris: <Oh come on, I'm not that bad!>

Jeanne: <Really? What is Caster's name?>

Cris: <So you were saying about our eyes getting healed?>

Cu: Alright, we're all set little lady! Let's see what we can do about those eyes of yours.

Romani: Your vitals are good on our end, Hannah. We'll probably have to do this again when you get back, but the less time spent wandering in the dark the better.

Cu: I don't need you to tell me my magic works, mage.

Marie: Go ahead with the procedure, Caster.

The runes surrounding us lit up, infusing with mana as.... nothing happened.

Cris: Oh, you have got to be shitting me.

Cu: It's quite alright, you're not the first maiden to be taken aback by my-

Cris: No jackass, I still can't see anything!

Mash: But the spell worked, senpai! Your eyes look perfectly healthy!

Cu: You wouldn't happen to be cursed, would you?

Romani: It's more likely one of two things. Either we need to heal Hannah in the present, or the problem is psychosomatic. Either way, it's not a problem we can solve now.

Jeanne: That's unfortunate, but at least we're not any worse off for trying. It gave us plenty of time for a break, at least. We should get moving towards- As we stood up to move, our foot caught a rock in the worst way, and we took a spill.

--- {Cris}

Cris: Agh, motherfuck... er...

Holy shit, I can see again! God, blasted hellscape never looked so good. Wow Mash does not look comfortable in that armor. And that old guy in blue must be caster.

Cris: Wait, were you flirting with me? You're like 40, what the hell?

Mash: This is wonderful! Thank goodness!

Marie: We might just have a chance now.

Jeanne: <Maybe switching reset something?>

Kat: <That doesn't make any sense.>

Jeanne: <I know, I am just spitballing here.>

Cu: It's a step in the right direction, but her eyesight is clearly off. I'm still plenty young.

Cris: We can argue on the way. <Jeanne, you remember which way we need to go, right?>

Jeanne: <Leave it to me. We should travel much faster now.>

---- {Jeanne}

And with that switch, we are back in darkness.

Jeanne: That is less than ideal.

Marie: What happened now?

Jeanne: Hold on, I need to test something. <Kat, do you mind?>

--- {Kat}

We can see! Everybody's starting to look a little freaked out.

Kat: <Wow, those hassans really aren't wearing much, huh? They're pretty!>

Cris: <That's enough ogling, I'm turning this body around.>

--- {Cris}

Jesus, why the hell was Spartacus standing right behind us?

Cris: <Jeanne, why are you blushing? ...God, I can't take you two anywhere.> I pull us away from the big lug and back towards the sane part of the party.

Cris: Okay, tests done. The good news is I can see. Mostly. The bad news is that while we mostly have control over when it occurs, we might go blind at random, or if I get like, surprised or highly emotional.

Marie: And how, exactly, did you figure all that out by gawking at your servants?

Kat: Intuition.

Romani: You'll have to deal with it for now. After we get you back here we can work on a more permanent solution.

After we got on the road things went pretty smooth. The skeletons were pretty much a joke now that we could see them coming, and Caster even found time to teach Mash some new tricks. We barely managed to keep Spartacus from picking a fight with that berserker that's running around. Kat chatted with Saber and the assassins (I kinda zoned out for that tbh) and eventually we reached our destination. We hadn't even entered the cave yet, and already we could feel the raw energy pouring out of the thing.

Mash: Senpai, look out!

Mash threw herself in front of us as a sword, twisted, almost to the point of being unrecognizable, embedded itself in Mash's shield.

???: Sorry, but that's as close as you'll be getting to Excalibur.

Cris: What the hell?

Cu: I was wondering when you'd show up, Archer. I see you're still Saber's faithful knight, as always.

Archer: I don't know anything about that. All I'm sure of is there's an old pain showing up again.

Cu: You lot run on ahead. I've got some personal business to take care of.

Spartacus: Let him deal with the gatekeeper, we must strike at the heart of this tyranny!

Cris: Wait wha-

Spartacus grabbed us like a sack of potatos and ran into the cave. As we were getting dragged along, the opening salvos of their duel lit up the entrance behind us.

Jeanne: Assassin! Keep a couple personas near the entrance, and let us know if we'll have to deal with Archer.

Most of the remaining Hassans peeled off from the main group. Mash and the other servants were able to easily keep up with us, though Marie had to be carried on one of the larger hassan's shoulders.

Finally our bumpy ride ended in the opening of a large room. In its center stood a crater, with a massive beam of coalescing energy running from the floor to the ceiling.

Marie: The greater grail... what's that doing in Japan?

Spartacus: Face your end, oppressor! We have come to finish your reign of-

Before he could finish his sentence, a beam of energy burst forth from near the crater. It sucked the light out of whatever it touched, and when the dust settled, less than half of Spartacus' torso fell to the ground. I took a step closer to Mash.

Saber Alter: I have no patience for fools.

A servant clad in black platemail calmly strode forth, her sword still crackling with energy. With the veins on her armor pulsating, the entire thing almost seemed alive.

Saber Alter: You there, girls. You both have an interesting noble phantasm. I would like to test them.

With no other fanfare, she rocketed forwards, and her sword met Mash's shield. Mash and Saber Lily settled into their routine again, but Mash's training was already paying off. The older saber clearly wasn't used to fights against someone who could block her sword, and Mash took advantage of that to force openings for Lily to strike.

Alter was clearly going to lose, so she disengaged and fired off another beam from her noble phantasm. Mash responded in kind, and the black energy dissipated against the shield of light.

However, Alter expected this. and was simply using the beam as cover to get in closer again. Mash never saw the kick to her side coming, and she was easily sent flying, leaving Saber Lily alone with the experienced swordswoman.

It should have been a bloodbath. It was definitely one-sided, but for some reason Alter was holding back. Lily was mercilessly beaten down to the ground, but there was the slightest bit of hesitation that grew with each attack.

Kat: <Hey Jeanne? Do the scanny thing. Trust me.>

--- {Jeanne}

Jeanne: <Okay? I don't know what you- oh.>

We could no longer see the action, but we could still feel their spirit origins. Alter's was twisted by several things, much like the shadow servants we faced up to this point, but at her core, one thing was obvious. The saber lying on the ground and the saber standing over her were the same person.

Kat: <You guys seriously didn't notice they have the same face?>

Alter: It is useless, child. I am inevitable. I am what it means to be king.

Lily: Even if that's true... even if I'll be like you one day... I'm not you now, and I won't stop fighting you here!

Lily struggled to her feet, and focused all she had left into one final attack.

Lily: Sword of Selection, grant me your power!

Alter: Vortigern, Hammer of the Vile King reverse the rising sun.

Lily: Cleave the wicked! Caliburn!

Alter: Swallow the light, Excalibur Morgan!

The energy of their swords clashed, light and dark twisting around each other before it was all unleashed in an explosion that shook the cave.

--- {Cris}

Both sabers landed heavily. Alter lands in a heap near Spartacus' body, armor cracked from the impact. On the opposite side, Lily lays still, her spirit origin already starting to come apart. Alter pulls herself to her feet.

Alter: I will make this quick.

Before she can take a step, however, a large hand grabs her foot. Spartacus' body hasn't reformed enough to move yet, but he's alive, and that's enough.

Spartacus: HAHAHAHA! Come oppressor! Break your sword against my love!

Cris: Fuck yeah! I totally knew he was okay.

Jeanne: <Are any of us good at lying?>

To her credit, she damn near tried to do exactly what he said. Saber Alter launched blow after blow into the arm hold her in place. Each swing of her sword pulling energy from the greater grail and forcing it directly into Spartacus. We took this chance to run over to Lily. Mash had finally pulled herself from the wall she got launched into and was already there.

Mash: Senpai, your orders!

Cris: Just get your shield up and be ready!

Finally, Spartacus' body had enough. The energy stored within it writhed and began to break through, covering the cave in a bright purple light. Spartacus himself never stopped laughing the entire time.

Alter, and everything else that wasn't behind Mash's shield, was devastated by the explosion. When the dust settled, Spartacus was alone, collapsed on the ground, still smiling. ---- {Kat}

Kat: Lily? Lily it's over, you did it!

Lily barely stirred, her spirit origin was falling apart.

Lily: You were right, Master... Our journey was a lot shorter than I thought.

Kat: No! No, no, just hang in there. We can go get Cu, and he can... do something, I don't know!

Lily: I know this wasn't the best place to meet, but it was fun, right?

And then she turned to dust in our hands.

----- {Cris}

Kat was completely inconsolable, so I had to take over to keep things stable.

Marie: That was unorthodox, but well done. I guess even a third-rate mage can produce first rate work when pushed. Several points are still unclear, but we can call this mission a success.

Marie: If it is any consolation, now that Saber Lily has been recorded by Chaldeas, you should have an easier time resummoning her. She won't have any memory of this place, but that'll be true of any servant you summon in Chaldea.

???: Well, well, well. I did not expect you to get this far, Master of Chaldea. You've performed well beyond our expectations. And survived beyond the limits of my patience.

The voice came from everywhere at once, a cacophony that could barely be called speaking.

Cris: <Jeanne?>

Jeanne: <I'm on it!>

--- {Jeanne}

Suddenly, it appeared, standing over the remnants Alter left behind.

Jeanne: <what is that. what is that. what is that what is that>

Kat: <Jeanne?>

Jeanne: <what is that what the fuck is that What The Fuck Is That What. Is. That.>

---- {Kat}

It was Lev. We couldn't hear what he was saying over Jeanne's... whatever was happening to her. Mash put herself between us. Marie ran straight for him. Then hellfire opened beneath her feet. Olga's voice cut through.

Marie: No! Stop! I haven't even accomplished anything yet! From the moment I was born, I've never been accepted by anyone!

And she was gone. Jeanne finally calmed down.

Lev: You fool, Romani! You haven't figured it out yet? The future isn't "missing". It's been incinerated. It, and everything else outside of Chaldeas' protection. You lost the grace of our king, and this is the natural result.

The ground beneath us began to rumble.

Lev: Ah, the singularity is collapsing already. Farewell, Romani, Mash, Candidate #48. I have many places to be.

He was gone.

Mash: Doctor, perform an emergency rayshift, now!

Romani: This will be close, I might only be able to pull one of you out.

Mash: Senpai!

Jeanne: Mash!

Romani: You're not helping!

Mash and I joined hands. The world fell apart, and everything went black.

{Cris} We came to with a start, on the floor of the command center. Already some of the hassans were leading a cleanup effort to make the place more presentable. Mash is still alive, thank God, and Romani's also here.

Romani: Good, you're awake. I'm sorry to dump so much on you already, but time is of the essence. Are you alright with a briefing right now?

Cris: I mean it's not like I'm going to feel better any time soon, let's rip the bandaid off.

Romani: The main topic: Lev was right. Human history has been incinerated. Almost no space nor time on earth has been spared, culminating in the end of time at the end of 2018. The few points that still exist are these:

With that, Chaldeas lit up with seven bright points, each one with data pouring out of it.

Romani: These seven singularities are turning points in history that have been altered to change humanity's present. Chaldea is protected from this effect for now, but that protection won't last forever. Here's what we need to do: We need to fix these singularities if we're to have any hope of saving humanity. You are our only master, and the servants you've summoned are our best bet. I know you don't have much of a choice here, but I have to ask: are you willing to do this?

Cris: Of course.

Kat: <We will.>

Jeanne: <For Marie.>

Romani: Excellent. Well then! Our object is to protect and recover human history. Our opponent is history itself. To challenge our fate is an act of blasphemy against the past itself, but this is our only chance of survival. This is now the highest and only priority of humanity: a Grand Order.

Cris: Well, Spartacus? How's that sound? A rebellion against fate itself? Spartacus simply grinned, but for the first time it seemed almost genuine.

[yet-another-saberface]

Fate/ & My Anxiety

Okay, so, I kinda had a rough day today, but that rough day really made me want to write this. I’d been thinking about it for a bit, but now I’m sure that this is something I should put out there, because I’m sure at least someone out there has had a similar experience. And if I write this correctly, it should be an interesting read anyways. (Post now updated with a cut & pretty gifs and things! I tried to keep the gifs more positive to offset some of the more serious parts of what I’m discussing.) So uh... Enjoy I guess? It’s kinda what it says on the tin.

Warning for serious mentions of anxiety and stuff. But I try to keep it lighter than it could be. For anyone else that might have some anxiety problems like me, it might help you to read this, because it’s really just a discussion of some themes I’ve taken away from the series that really helped me with my own anxiety. But whether you read it or not you should probably take a sec to breathe, that never hurts.

So. I’m going to be upfront about this. I have anxiety. Not just a normal amount of stress, but actual, diagnosed anxiety. I am not medicated, but at the moment that’s mostly because my doctors think that trying medication during this whole pandemic situation wouldn’t actually let them know if it would help me in the long term. I’ve been living with anxiety for pretty much my entire life, but I just thought everyone was stressed out, and that life sucked, and that I was bad at dealing with it. But that wasn’t the case.

But one thing is going to ring true for me regardless of what the state of my anxiety is, be it in the moment or over the course of my life. And that’s that like most things, media helped me with it before I even realized what it was. As I sit around in quarantine and try to manage my fluctuating stress levels, I’ve found myself drifting back to the Fate Series, and FGO, after taking a break from them for few months, arguably even the past year.

At this point, it’s been around 3 years, maybe even 4, since I originally discovered Fate. And I’m not going to lie, I didn’t get the best possible first impression, because I started with the Deen anime from 2005. I’d seen Saber before, had no idea who she was other than some chic I vaguely looked like with a good character design and a sword, and saw her on the cover of an anime. So I watched it. I had no idea what the hell was going on, and was trying to piece everything together as I watched, but I watched to the end. And I liked it. It definitely wasn’t my favorite show. But when I heard that it was “the bad one,” and that there was more, I gladly went to go watch it.

And that might not make sense at first, but I’m emitting a huge detail. I was, and still am, a huge mythology nerd. As I was watching the original Stay Night anime, I was fascinated by the portrayals of these characters that, technically, I already knew. And I was really into the idea that there was more of that.

So later that year, I watched Fate/Zero. And I’m gonna be honest, I was too young to really appreciate everything it had to offer, and I’m planning on going back to it soon, but I loved every second of that show. When I got the chance, I binged through it, and it was heavy stuff, but I couldn’t take my eyes away from it.

And after that, I started looking up what else there was. I watched Carnival Phantasm in maybe 2 days tops and adored it. I procrastinate on watching a lot of stuff, because I found myself having less and less time to myself, but that same summer I watched Zero, I also started playing FGO. I started the game for the characters I already knew. I stayed because I found a story I was genuinely invested in on its own, and a community that was really fun to observe, if not be an active part of. I still remember sitting down on a day when I had nothing to do and finishing Okeanos all in one go. Or laying down after a long day at school and doing the same to a ReRun event. It was a great stress outlet, and I was invested.

But the more I look back on all of that, I start to see details that explain even better why I was so invested. I don’t have a single favorite Fate character, but I will admit that I adore Saber. She’s what drew me in, my friends who know Fate apparently think I look like her, and we all know the Excalibur scene from Zero looks like it should be in an actual movie.

I won’t claim to be a character expert, despite being a writer. I didn’t write Saber, let alone any other Fate character. But the more I think about her, the more I start to realize that yeah, I understand a lot of what she’s gone through. Do I know what it’s like to be a King and run a country and what that entails? No obviously not. But I do know what it’s like to feel that you have a duty to everyone around you to not screw things up. I understand how someone could feel extremely guilty when they do eventually screw things up. There’s a lot of ways to look at any character, but I realize now that from the beginning that that specific idea was the lens through which I understood Saber.

And it holds true for most other characters. With Shirou, did I understand losing your parental figure or an undying desire to be a hero? Not really. But I did understand the fact that he felt like he wasn’t good enough, and that he gained value by putting himself on the line for others. I may not have risked my life for another person, but I’ve definitely put myself through mental stress enough to induce multiple panic attacks a day for other people.

And now we get to the part of this... I don’t want to call it an essay. The part of this post. Where I talk about Gil.

Am I aware that in most (early) depictions of him in Fate, he’s a horrible dick of a person who deserves no respect? Yes, I am.

But I also know that when I think about some of the less horrible aspects of him as a character now, there’s stuff in there I should take away that is good. I just went on an whole rant about how I can understand low self esteem and self sacrifice and crushing responsibility and the pressure to not screw it all up. And these days, I can’t stop thinking about how Saber admitted to a lot of that and (this is obviously a gross oversimplification but you should get by now that this is personal and specific) the response from Gil and Rider was “It sounds like you aren’t living life as happily as you could and are setting a bad example of how to live life for those that look up to you.” And that idea keeps coming back to me in every moment when I’m having an anxiety attack, or cram studying even though I know I’m ready, or finishing something due two weeks from now tonight because I won’t have to do it later. And it only hits me harder because I know I’m not a King or anything lofty like that, but I am a labeled “gifted student” and a support person for many of my friends and a designated “responsible one” and all of these other things. And yet I’m preaching for them to do as I say not as I do when it comes to enjoying life and taking care of yourself.

I don’t know if I fully internalized that message when I first watched that scene. But I must have in some capacity because it still haunts me now, reminding me that maybe I shouldn’t be giving into all of this stress. And I’m trying, I really am, to keep that in mind as I fight against all of it and try to keep things under control.

And then there’s Babylonia. When I really get down to it, I have a pretty strong emotional connection to this part of FGO. I joined the game pretty late, roughly right after Camelot’s release, so I had a lot of catching up to do. But I caught up, and I got to experience this story that I’d heard was one of the best in the game as it came out. If I wanted to I could say a LOT more about Babylonia, and maybe I will in the future. 

But I’m not going to deny that CasGil has been a pretty prominent presence in my mind ever since when it comes to stress and responsibility. (Heck I could probably talk about just him specifically for at least a good 5th of what I have so say about Babylonia. Maybe I will someday.) I mean, it’s kind of his thing, you see the fandom joke about it all the time how he’s the Gil that doesn’t sleep because he just keeps on working and working and working. And that’s why there was this one moment when I was watching the Babylonia anime that now stands out to me. When Gil goes with the player out to the observatory, he just leaves. He doesn’t bother apologizing to anyone or explaining his actions, he just goes. And we know, as basically an outsider, that this is him taking a break. He needed a break and so he just took a break without any clarifications or explanations or apologies. Sure he might justify it to the player has needing to do some other work out there, but that actually makes it hit harder for me. Because he’s justifying his breaks as more work.

I used to be lucky enough to have a clear cut line between what was my time and what was other people’s time (that I was giving them out of my time) and what time belonged to school/work. And now all of that has been thrown out the window and I’ve been having to teach myself how to do what I just described.

Take a goddamn break without having to tell everyone else how sorry I am for taking a day to actually rest and breathe and all those other important things. And yet I still have to justify those breaks to myself as time to take care of other things. 90% of the time, those breaks aren’t breaks to me, they’re time to work on my novel instead of my essay, or something like that.

And then I glance down at my phone and I’m hit with most of what I just wrote flooding into my head. And I try to tell myself that no, it’s okay to just take a break. And that I should be allowing myself to enjoy being alive instead of being a slave to expectations and responsibilities. And that as a person I know other people look up to I should be setting a better example of how to take care of yourself. And sometimes it works. Other times there’s more things at play and it doesn’t get through to me the same way, but it’s something that works. All of the hours I’ve spent with those character remind me that what I’m doing isn’t okay on a pretty regular basis at this point. And I’m really glad for that. And I hope that all of this stuff will continue to help me as it’s helping me right now.

At least I know that when I feel like I’m freaking out, I can open FGO and play through a quest and I’ll usually feel better. So I’m just gonna keep trying, keep managing, until I find a place where it’s finally all okay again, as much as it can be.

(P.S: More reasons that CasGil is my grailing target right now? Yeah that’s true but these reasons are deeper than “I got a Merlin look at that” or “Grailing Jalter is useful.” He’s a character that’s genuinely important to me and I think that finally investing in him is going to be really satisfying for me.)

[kyogre-blue]

FGO Babylonia anime, ep21 (complete)

So I had left the last two episodes for months... And now finally finished, in honor of Ereshmas rerun. 

Here’s what I still remember from my impressions. 

The music wasn’t as good as Apoc. The game has better music too, or at least uses it better. 

I appreciate that they used a consistent style for designs that come from a bunch of artists in the game, but I did not love the Takeuchi faces. Da Vinci never stopped looking weird, and Gil suffered from how lacking they are in terms of expressions. 

There was a lot of landscapes in the beginning, which I’m not sure why. Not bad, but kinda weird focus. 

The asses were excessive in the beginning, but they did start to tone it down after a while. 

The battle animations were detailed in terms of how the characters moved, which is cool. But I feel like the battles just weren’t as epic of Apoc could get. It especially showed toward the very end, where most of the fighting is characters setting off their NPs. The voice clips are great fanservice, but it doesn’t always feel like it has much impact. Also, I still don’t know what to make of the very specific sci fi horn(?) sound that accompanied stuff like beams shooting or weapon materialization. 

I did really like their take on Ritsuka. I liked how he thought through things but was also unwavering in his determination. He’s cute. I also liked Mash. The animations for her expressions (and her hair!) were some of the best. I especially like them together. They felt like a wonderful partnership and really like they had each other’s back. The small ways they touched were especially nice, like Ritsuka putting his hand on Mash’s back when she’s holding up her shield. 

The first leg of the show was kind of... not bland exactly, but not very exciting. It’s a shame they cut out the hijinks Chaldea got up to in Uruk. I think it would have been nice to have an extra episode of mostly humor stuff like them running around causing chaos. Gil really liked it too. Speaking of Gil, it didn’t help that he got severely toned down at the start. He just didn’t have the same energy as the game. Later on, he started to emote much better, so maybe they got used to doing him... It helped that Ishtar and Eresh showed up with their Rin freakouts too lol

In any case, the big turn for me was definitely Leonidas and Ushi’s episode. That really nailed it. Leonidas was great as always, and I really liked Ushi’s perspective on “there is a child in the future who knows my name and that’s why I’ll keep fighting.” It feels very suited to a Servant, and it works well for Ritsuka. (Also, still amazed that Ushi was out there the entire time with her tits just hanging out and the animators only focused on it once.)

Overall, I’d say that it’s not an amazing adaptation and it doesn’t quite hit as hard emotionally as the game did, but that’s somewhat to be expected. Although some things were cut, I don’t think it was a total disaster like Apoc. However, I’m not sure how much sense any of this will make to those who haven’t played the game. The prologue episode did not help in any way, in that regard. 

[mrpenguinpants]

This isn’t important at all but because of social distancing I have nowhere else to vent my feelings about this game too and my friends have all blocked me.

Man, you ever see someone so beautiful that you know they are going to overrun your life because not to be dramatic, but I will lay my fucking life down for Seox

Like fucking, move over Gilgamesh. I have not touched FGO or BSDTOL because I’ve just been playing gbf 24/7. Literally, its 5am when I’m typing this (mostly because of the new drang and strum event which I will get to later in this essay) 

Btw I have this weird auto-correct on, idk how to turn it off or why it only fixes some words, so if names get mixed up that’s why 

I started this game because I saw Belial being posted 84 times on my twitter and I’m thinking, who is this man and why is he on my dash so many times. Turns out he’s from gbf. like okay seems interesting. turns out it a mobile game. well, buddy lemme level with you I don't have any more phone storage so ripp but oh shit wait I can play this mobile game on my browser??? I've been trying to get FGO on my computer for 84 years (I haven't actually I'm too lazy) okay now I am very very intrigued because playing a mobile game on my browser is apparently a big deal to me

okay play the tutorial seems like an okay game, kinda boring I think after a while but oh wait

they got me where it hurts

the gambling addiction 

and when you first start you get free 10 draws every day for maybe a week? and its like fuckinggg??? my first ssr was melleau (I will treasure her forever) so I was pretty much sold 

I just wanted to peek into the lore then fucking tripped on my ass and fell into the rabbit hole that is lucilius and sandalphon because ummmm sandy is my bread and butter and I hate the fact I didn't get his summer version. literally, I started Feb 25 this year just I was right before the 6th anniversary and the GOD DAMN FUCKING SCRATCHER BULLSHIT but my gacha luck is fucking god tier in that game but my e rank luck sucks all the life out of it so I have a pretty stacked team (let’s ignore the fact that I could have gotten grimnir 2 times on the scratcher but nope more fucking soul berries yay...though I shouldn’t be complaining too much because it gave me cain, Lucio, monika, and someone else?? I don’t remember) but did sandy wanna come home? no of course not

though I did get percival summer and halluel and malluel and they can do 2M dmg if the boss your facing is at max health with one ability/skill. Basically, I’ve got a pretty stacked team for all elements but weapons are awful because I may be Lvl 100+ but I'm on chapter fucking 9 because I accidentally made an oops and got the 1hr Exp boost and did slime search with my nuke team over and over again. Also I was super sad I couldn’t get Heles summer event character either cause she’s a god tier okie dokie in my heart. I also love Zeta and Beatrix like fuck dude. I have both of them and their white day scenes are so cute, esp Bea. Side note, I would smash Esser/Tien so hard into the ground because holy fuck my heart cannot take this abuse?? She’s also such a sweetheart and I basically love everyone in this game 

But yeah, seox, I love him and I am so upset that when I started, it was during the unite and fight event and I could have gotten his revenant weapon and nope I fucking went for niyon and seite and I didn’t realize that when I fully upgrade the weapons I get the eternal and even then. i literally fucking switched draw boxes because I didn't understand how uncapping worked so I have a 2 star siete weapon sword thing and a 2 star harp and I wanna kms basically because I could have gone for the six ruin fist to get seox or the fucking dagger because oh my god I love quatre/feower??? I played the seeds of redemption and thought he was low-key kind of a prick but NO I UNDERSTAND NOW HE IS A PRECIOUS CHILD AND I WILL ALSO LAY MY LIFE FOR HIM. Dude is so pretty its unfair and my fugly ass. i looked like the joker from the Animated batman cartoons (you fucking know the one) But its okay, at least I went for two wind eternals and I like pretty much everyone except funf. Precious child and everything but I hate her voice. Also vryn, like best lizard but a fucking gremlin that I wish I could mute

this entire game is basically me understanding that I really like sweetheart tsunderes and self-empowered girls and that I really enjoy guys that are all gay to some fucking dumbass bastard, hate life, and angsty 24/7 and full of anger but that's okay because I am stuck in reality and self aware

but is that going to stop me? probably not

Also can i just go on an entire different subject and talk about lancelot because FGO did him wronggggggg. I love him. So much. Like holy shit dude im so happy him and Percy got into gbf versus 

Also when I was doing lucio’s fate episode I love him but god damn i wanted to skip that fate episode. homeboy comes out with a fucking spotlight on him and starts spitting bullshit like he's god damn Shakespeare 

Also, I really like Sandalphon with Lyria and Drang with Strum platonically cause its some major wholesome shit. The new event for Drang and Strum is some pure stuff and I’m speedrunning the event so I can get all the materials and etc but holy shit do people kill the event raids so fast??? i still have ptsd trying to solo nehan tho granted drang and strum aren’t that hard to beat. Also playable nehan when??? Mugen is great and all and I have him but if it was nehan instead that means I could have gotten nehan AND I WANT THAT TRADE. Mugen goes super saiyan and he’s an absolute unit so it’s alright but i love nehan and fuck dude give me seeds of redemption part 2 please

In conclusion, my love for seox has turned violent but I will be the first to say that when he get’s his mask taken from siero it is not okie dokie for my heart when he acts surprised 

[naddy-and-stuff]

Starry, starry night

So you might be thinking "WHERE MY FGO CONTENT AT??"

Sorry. I know it's been a while, but it's been hard to get the creative juices flowing... :( So have an Ikemen Vampire short instead. XD

I do not own Vincent. Both of the Vincents.

TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of suicide (very faint I think? Unless you actually know Vincent's biography). Please exercise caution when reading.

<>.<>

Vincent woke up early that morning. It was one of those days when he suddenly felt awake and well-rested despite only managing sleep for, at most, two hours. Despite being a nearly immortal vampire, he felt happy - pleased even - to know that he somehow still needed sleep. He could not feel many things, but he at least felt more alive by still having his basic needs.

Speaking of basic needs, coffee was something he still enjoyed, like sunshine filtering through the windows, or the soft purring of cats. It was like the flowers Sebastian tended to in the garden, Will's jokes, Theo's sharp eyes, or Arthur's swagger. It was sunflowers, feathers, moonlight, starlight, the taste of rogue, and everything in between.

It pleased him to smell coffee in the air, accompanied by a sweet voice: a sliver of white amidst a sea of inky blackness. The manor was quiet; none of its other colorful inhabitants was up and about yet, so Vincent had this moment all to himself.

For they could not love you

But still your love was true

The song was certainly not one he had heard before and living with someone like Mozart made him familiar to most songs. Vincent supposed it was one of your songs from the future. Foreign, but pleasing all the same: like a new easel that smelled of freshly shaved wood.

And when no hope was left inside

On that starry, starry night

You took your life as lovers often do

The words gave him pause and made his chest ache. It pulled the wool over his eyes, darkened his surroundings and painted four gray walls with nothing but a small window of hope. Was it a memory? He could not recall being somewhere so... dreary. How could he paint there? Theo would frown - like he always did - if Vincent presented him with that kind of painting, filled with hopelessness and lacked any substance.

The window gave way to stars: white against the swirling hues of purple, gray and blue. Vincent lost a paintbrush once, and had to replace it with a new one. In essence, they were the same brush, but felt different and wrong in his hands. He could see the stars, but they looked wrong. They looked more like they were being swallowed by the darkness, instead of casting it aside.

Vincent leaned against the wall. Something in his ear hurt: a phantom pain, but when he touched it there was nothing. It was surreal. He was unable to feel some things, but now he was feeling something and it felt wrong, like someone had somehow removed the manor and replaced it with cold, cold...

But I could've told you, Vincent

This world was never meant

For one as beautiful as you

The words were Theo's. Or at least close enough. But the voice was yours, the song from your time and all of a sudden it felt wrong, but also right. He smelled coffee again and the phantom pain in his ear disappeared. The stars twinkled as they should, much like in Mozart's composition. There was no coldness. His chest ached, but only so that he could still feel and not to overpower him. Before he knew it, he was by the kitchen.

You had stopped singing and while Vincent lamented that, he was also secretly glad.

"Coffee?"

"Yes please."

~.~.~

So I was playing Vincent's route in the EN server event and when he shared what Theo said about him (I forgot what it was exactly but it's kinda along the lines of the song), I climbed out of writer's block limbo and decided to write this. XD

I love the song Vincent really. It's one of the reasons why I'm looking forward to Vincent's route in IkeVamp. I tried to incorporate the end of his life, but that he somehow repressed it, or however you want to interpret it. Cause seriously? That sweet, sweet cinnamon roll in IkeVamp shooting himself and getting drunk on absinthe for the pain? Yeaaaaaah not the first time Cybird has completely changed the character. XD

No hate though. I'm just saying... :3

Lemme know what you think about it, or if you want to talk in general. :3 ALSO! I may or may not be thinking about making a cover of the song... Maybe...

[avicebro]

rate... casters then? if you haven't done it yet?

one two three WIFE hey honey i love you so much i think about you constantly you are the best. have you at 100 10/10/10 and bond level 10 now so you’re basically perfect now, just gotta max fou you. love your np charge skill. love your myths.. you’re good. i love you so much. i love you and kuzuki so much. i just want you guys to be happy and i just want to make you happy let me just.. treat you thank you for carrying me all the time MWUAh infinity/10

I personally like him a lot but I know some people find him uncomfortable which is totally understandable. Still.. haven’t finished working on him in FGO I’m sorry lol. Love his relationship with both Prelati and Ryuunosuke and can’t wait for him to meet his bfs again. so like 8/10? yeah

HEY HANS. man you could have been.. so much better. I know that it’s not your fault though and I have nothing against you. I just… love the idea that he’s defined by what people thought he was like based off of what he wrote about. Wish they would actually reference the bisexuality cause heyo it’s important to his stories /dab. Stop asking for alcohol you’re like 12. Wish he like.. actually acted like how he did in real life sometimes tho lol. Kiara fuckers don’t interact. 10/10 love him. 

HEY WILL. one of the best parts of apocrypha, hands down, just wish he was in more of it. shave your mustache off though it creeps me out. ever since i learned you share va’s with tesla i can’t think. love how you have a buster up which ties with amakusa and semiramis. love you so much, sorry for taking so long to level you up lol. it looks like you’re having fun which is what matters. i’ll take you to shinjuku for drinks or something. nice thighs please step on me. 10/10 would die for.

ship you with paracelsus. whenever you dress up it’s kind of illegal? just kind of? thought you would do more in london but alas. love art where you and paracelsus adopt jack and teach her about the fun ways of murder. your hair is an aesthetic. mephi is cute guys. make paramephi art im begging you 7/10

7/10 please stop haunting me and my dreams. who said you could be that hot.

you came home for new years! which was nice! i appreciate it a lot! i use you a lot and i’m sorry you’re just very useful. sorry waver i like el melloi more. long haired men are hot, it’s been clinically tested. wanna run my hands through your hair while you play dark souls. i’m not thirsty for you i support you in your transition and i hope you and your like 8 blond kids are having a fun time saving the world and dismantling the grail or whatever. 8/10

7/10 best cu hands down don’t @ me. like him in fuyuki. hope he comes back soon? also ugh when is he gonna get that animation update fgo? anytime soon? please? i think your final art is gorgeous by the by. one of the first servants i finished.

probably her best outfit let’s be real here. good girl. nothing bad to say here she’s a great daughter and i love her in all forms. 9/10

I think you were a ticket? I think? Ugh 5/10 I appreciate you coming home in all forms, I really do Tamo, ugh, I’m glad you like me so much but now I’m worried that Vicci will come home and I don’t know how to feel about that one. Pairs really well with my Medeas, I had you and Medea Lily stall for like, a whole bunch of fucking turns which made me wanna kms but also proved how well you two can stall so good job.

HELLO. I’m so sorry I didn’t use my free four star on you and instead went for the thirsty choice I’m sorry but thank you so much for coming home regardless for new years MWUAH. currently grailed to 98. I’m working on your skills next honey just please be patient. All of her lines about not liking being touched scare me and I want to fight anyone who does anything dirty with you EVEr. I think your art is gorgeous and you’re so pretty and I want to make sure you’re never sad again. Love art where you have been adopted by Hektor. I’ll beat up Jason for you. infinity/10

ANother good girl. Came home recently and three times at that! Thank you for that Nursery Rhyme. You’re.. very cute. I love how you’d expect her to be this like, shy, silent girl but nOPE she’s a critting, curious, buster machine and she works so well with the other authors good job NR. I can’t say I’d beat up Hans for you but we can certainly give him a stern talking to. Love writing her the most out of the authors honestly. Your LE episodes killed me. When are you gonna be in Extella. 10/10

His coat is made out of husband material. Very pretty. I want to braid your hair and be your assistant. One of the first servants that I got that I was like, okay I know nothing about you but you’re hot so I love you lol. His voice is very soothing. Love you with Mephi but the art with Hektor and Avi is also very cute. When I need to draw hair I draw you. Love you I’ll draw you more. 10/10

I’m sorry I know very little about you I’m sorry. I think your human form is very hot though. I have someone who has you at level 100 and they’re stronger than anyone I’ve ever seen TBQH. You’re cute in the summer race, Babbage sensei. Also dailybabbage is still the best daily blog don’t @ me 5/10

You also came home recently! Thanks! I actually like her a lot just hate her artist and her archer version. Wish she was an actual old lady instead of being.. whatever this is lol. Love her relationship with Edison, they seem like if they were two old friends who after their partners died they moved in together with an Indian demigod. Please put on some more clothes. Please take her away from her artist. Oh and I’ll beat up Sherlock for you. 7/10

You came home a very long time ago and I’m sorry you’ve been stuck at like.. 54 for a long time lol. I associate you with someone though. I really like Tedison but I never talk about it. I just assume all Americans are like this honestly. All hail our presi-king. hey fgo you wanna add bell so they can be friends instead of just constantly hinting at it? huh? anyways you’re good i just need to finish leveling you up. 6/10

gold border cause you’re level 90 in na. i have a lot of problems with you but i’m not the right person to talk about it. you’re still so bad in terms of racist designs i’m sorry. wish they had done you better. pat pat. 6-10/10 cause i’m conflicted honestly. your personality isn’t bad but like……….. the design… and the fact that they turned you into this like shaman when you just weren’t… and the fact that you didn’t like pictures being taken and i’m sorry geronimo that they did this to you you don’t deserve it

i wasn’t playing fgo when you arrived so please can i have a rerun? can i please have a rerun? i want iri. good mom. i want her to adopt caren and angra and be the ‘cool mom’. i’d like a hug please. thanks mom. 7/10

i associate you with ip so you’re good. i wish your final art was more interesting though. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh your event is good too. love your relationship with li shuwen. i kinda forget all the time that you were in the summer race event. WHoops. oh and also you can do your NP on me thanks. 5/10

hey i have you too! sorry you’re at like.. level 41.. i’m sorry i have a lot of casters. nice thighs.. i like your face things as well. ears are cute. hope you’re having fun with your gf. wish you would work better as a catalyst for your gf tho lol. keep it up im proud of you. also ugh beat up ozy for me thanks. 6/10

10/10 MOM. maybe one day you can be your normal self again. wish that instead of da vinci lily they did it so you went to like a different painting instead but whatever. i’ll kill kirei for you dw

you’re good. i want you to come home so i can have more dumas catalysts tbh. but you’re soft and good and i hope you’re having fun. here take a head pat. 5/10

i’d probably only roll cause then i’d have the complete emiya-einzbern family. but you’re still on thin ice. i’m sorry your event is horrible. i’m sorry your anime is too. here take a head pat. 3/10

you came home recently too! and not even in the dantes/casgil gacha which confused the shit out of me lol. thank you artist for drawing a gil so that we can finally get more gil content cause takeuchi would never. associate you with a lot of people like you’re constantly showing up on my friend’s supp list. you’re good, i think i like you better than your archer version. take a nap. 7/10

5/10 thanks for carrying me you fuck. 

PLEASe. PLEase come home. Why did you send Medb twice. I wanted you. You’re the last author I need. Literally all I need is you now. Please. I’m begging you. How much must I give for you to come home? I’m on my knees. I’m sorry Agartha did.. that. I’m sorry people do gross shit to you. I’m sorry for your tag. I’m sorry people say racist and gross things about you. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this shit. Please.. I have your gf. You can be happy here I promise. 100/10

you’re like one of the few summer servants who’s ascensions make sense good job. also like your animations. if you’d come home that would be great more dumas catalysts. 5/10

I think it’s always a good sign when you’re aunt in law comes home twice. I love how they took your name seriously with the bird wings. And I love all the subtle hints to Medea in your design, as well. Circe is by far my favourite part of The Odyssey, so I’m glad she was added. I’m curious to see if they’ll add Odysseus and what she thinks about him 9/10

I don’t have much to say about you I just wish they didn’t just shove a bunch of “vaguely African things” together and call it a day. Your attacks are cool though and I wish you and your husband a good time. Hope you have fun with David, too. 5/10?

another high on my wife list. did not know how much i loved you until i rolled you. i like you and kadoc so i won’t say you’re my wife. love your anniversary art thing. hope you’re having a good day. kinda confused about the whole “i knew i died thing” considering that anastasia became so well known because people weren’t sure if she had died or not.. kinda feels weird in a series about characters being altered by how they were remembered 15/10

gold cause he’s currently 85 in jp. can’t wait to get you to 100 baby love you. didn’t care for you as much in apo but you’re cool now. wish you would be more of a jackass to me though, show me how much you despise humanity you lil shit. multiple arms? good. horns? good. 10/10 great design love you. currently at 8/10/10 why do you need so many bullets for huh? just curious. anyways. infinity/10

you’re good. don’t think you’re like, the best fate protag but you’re good. don’t deserve all the shit you got though lol. here have a head pat. 6/10

you’re only used cause you pair well with dantes. what the fuck is going on in your final art btw. 3/10

gremlin. do not trust. 7/10

oh you know. he’s alright, i guess. 

[dailyarturia]

Please rate the Lancers so the world may have a clear and obvious objective base on which Lancers are the best characters because subjectivity isn't real and it is clear you are the expert on all things Lancer and thus are qualified to be the definitive objective source for all opinions on Lancers. (or just share some other lancers you think are cool and maybe some you wish had been done better that's fine too)

the best lancer which is why he’s the one everyone thinks of when you say ‘lancer’. the beauty. the muscles. the spandex. the personality. the voice. the colour palette. the archetype he represents. the way he fits into the rest of the fate cast. his skillset. his animations. the ultimate. the absolute. could’ve just stopped making lancers after this one bc they’ll never top this one. EX/10

handsome. entry level thirst but that’s not necessarily bad. victimises himself a lot in zero so people going uwu poor baby on him piss me off just a lil because both the situation with grainne and with sola was supposed to be morally ambiguous and out of everyone’s control. I like how he’s a good example of how feitos are kinda doomed to repeat the same mistakes of their legend. my top fav until I played fsn and learnt what true love is (its cu). 8/10

a good boy! a handsome boy! a boy of many talents! just wants to help at all times but never learnt how to mince words so he comes across as the absolute rudest fucker. in ccc he lists “his own poor communication skills” as the thing he dislikes. 10/10

wants to clear his name as bloodthirsty vampire but only the vampire part because he knows what he did and he won’t try to deny it, he just wants to clear up the things that were added later he didn’t do. very good and nuanced. very spicy uncle. I’m not saying I want to fuck vlad I’m just saying that if vlad were to come up to me and ask me if I wanted to fuck I would not say no. 9/10 I should actually read apocrypha sometime

spicier uncle but less personality. 8/10 why did he have to be a package deal with that fucking clown

pls no bully. treated as kind of a joke a lot but a really nice character if you pay attention. absolutely as bloodthristy and evil as her legends but all because she was genuinely never taught different and therefore doesn’t realise her actions are evil and the reason she is hated. desperate to be loved because her literal life depended on it. later on starts to slowly realize just how fuckedth she is and tries to make amends even though she knows full well she can’t possibly ever make up for everything she did. hates her future self’s guts because she knows what she did will make her end up like that but still wants to change it somehow because this time she knows it was wrong. 10/10 please god let CCC get localised

if i see one more fucker say she has no personality I will FIGHT I love her. insanely powerful and worked hard for it but because of it reached a point where none of her achievements are achievements anymore and instead are just something she would’ve done eventually bc she has all the time in the world for it. claims to want to die but actually just wants to feel alive again. actually pretty easily excited especially when fights to the death are involved but feels like she has to keep up a composed teacher front. an overcompetent mess who has no idea how to do anything without doing the Most. 100/10

now THERE’s a lancer girl with no personality. I’m sorry bryn you’re beautiful beyond belief but fragments has a bad writer and I hope you get to shine in fgo sometime bc that’s what saved arash and ozymandias 7/10 

treated entirely as a joke in fgo so far and mostly known in fate for getting cucked but his legend has a lot more and is actually pretty cool so I hope he gets to be taken seriously sometime too. dressed up as a baby once to avoid fighting a dude bigger than him. stabbed himself in the face to avoid falling into a magic sleep and then fucked up a dude another time. now that’s what I call a grab bag of a character! 7/10

100% YOUAERE My FUCKIGN GI>RLFREIONGD 10/10

dirt friend 10/10

whose fucking child is this

whom?

supreme

[uzyplus]

15. September 2019 Mysterious Girlfriend X Hello, it's been a while, hasn't it? The reason for that is basically that I haven’t finished a single anime in these past months, well I have read quite a lot of manga and manhua which I don’t really like writing about, just too lazy to do that. I finished about 21 of em or am currently reading + like 40 on webcomics I think?

Another thing I’d like to mention is that youjo senki movie falls under it’s anime, so no post for that.

Now to anime: I watched all 13 episodes of it and read manga from ch36 as it was the exact point where anime left out. Watching school romance after such a long time sure felt refreshing, I really enjoyed like the first 5 or so episodes of anime, had quite a good laugh at it. It was just so cute and satisfying to watch, well I went to sleep and picked it up again the next day. Well I have to say that the whole saliva thing was getting quite overplayed at this point and maybe a bit disgusting at times (me without knowing that I’ll have manga worth 1 day to read still ahead). Well I got to enjoy it in the end ~for some reason I get happier watching things at late hours~ the ending for anime was kinda disappointing ~not to mention it didn’t make any sense in contrast with what we know from manga~ But well it did good, coz it was interesting enough for me to pick up manga after all. Well I forgot to mention at the beginning that I didn’t like Mikoto’s voice at first, it just seemed so off when she screamed or laughed ~well screamed~ but otherwise it was really lovely, I mean she did that psycho laugh like twice during the whole show and it just happened to be during first episode. First episode seemed sooooo~ long (might be coz I just didn’t bother speeding playback speed up...) but well I think that most of the development happened there anyway. I really liked the speed their relationship was developing at, nice and slow, there’s no need to rush things up, just take your time, you’re just 17 after all. Actually I figured out their age on ep13, oh boy I need to pay more attention to some details~ Well I was thinking they were like 14-15 coz of the whole: first kiss, first xxx deal, kids usually pay attention to it during that age or a bit sooner, I mean I haven’t given myself these questions since like 15yo, so yea, their age quite surprised me. Another thing to mention is that the saliva was just too thick the whole time, I mean what is it a honey? ~Well it surely tasted sweet so maybe?~ So now I should write something about manga, hmmmm~ that’ll be pretty hard considering I pretty much skip some text pretty often and then again I read it around 10pm-1am so my brain was pretty much dead at that time already. Well I will try, but first imma go post this thing so that for some reason I won’t lose it and do a quick manga recap. It’s sure a good idea to start writing this at 10pm when it’s Monday and I had 9 lessons with 0 one, uff~

Alright, I just remembered there was that Aika girl. At first I thought she would appear just once or twice during the story, for the last time when he bought that Imai Monoka album and would talk him out of it or something. After a while she started to annoy me, coz of her way too intimate and often contacts with Akira and after a while I pretty much started to hate her for trying to bewitch him all the time. In the end she didn't turn out to be a bad character at all, she just wanted to find someone that would love her, even if she didn't love him and not leave her as all the guys she loved. 

Then there's Ryouko who harassed Akira pretty much without stating a reason. I assume she had a slight crush for mc, considering she proposed to be his secondary girl I g? Out of all the romances happening throughout the story I found her the best.

It's a big letdown that Akira never told Ueno who's his girlfriend, I mean some other characters knew it, but he never told it to his best friend, ah.

I don't really have anything to write about the movie part, about the Valentine's part: I thought Youko's gotta see the black chocolate package and realize their relationship or something, but in the end it wasn't a box, but just a foil wrapping or whatever, there goes my fantasies~I don't even know why I thought it was a box~ 

Akira was also quite smart, I mean I would never realize if I didn't see them or he said them, like the naked apron for example. It was really enjoyable watching their newlyweds-like scenes, also really looked forward to their kiss, which I assumed their daily routine would eventually turn into and that's where I was totally bamboozled. I mean why would you do that? It totally disappointed me, Youjo kissed her boyfriend, Oka and Ryouko as well and you tell me that you'd rather continue having her finger in your mouth than actually kiss her? Now I wonder who was the actual reason for such a slow and long relationship development. That would be an epic way how to end the story, I mean seriously, you were looking forward that kiss for some chapters now and you just let it all go. Alright alright, nevermind, it's your story, live it however you want, imma just curl up in the corner of my room and fantasize about how nice it would have been... humph~

Well overall I think it's somewhere around +2,5 and +3, imma decide that tomorrow ~morning is wiser than evening~ (actually this phase sounds rather plain in English, it sounds a bit better in my language to me) Also imma pick a pic for this tomorrow coz it's nearing 11:30pm now and I want to sleep ~there's also this one fly annoying me rn~

Wow, this actually turned out to be the longest post I've ever written and I'm pretty confident that I'll write more to it tomorrow coz I haven't talked about main characters that much yet

Hello, how have you been? This lazy ass pleb just totally left this post alone incomplete for like 3 days... and now doesn’t really remember what he wanted to write, well just perfect...

Alright, I guess I ended up somewhere around mc and mh I g? Eh, all that pops into my head is Real girl, which I started reading yesterday. 

Another reread later~ wait let me actually reread this whole thing so I’d get a general idea what it was about, coz I have 0 clue whatsoever.

Okay, sooo~ Mc was a fairly decent guy, he knew when he was hurting Mikoto and stopped in time, one thing that I wasn’t so ok with was that any girl could sway his mind, any girl wearing bikini, any pantsu, anything really ~which even irl I cannot understand when all the guys immediately apply fgo target focus skill, while I’m like: Protection from Arrows A~ (if you understood that you should play fgo a bit less) 

Mh, well what can I say about her? She was all cute, blushing occasionally, sometimes Akira did the blushing for her... I cannot really say whether she was jealous at times, it seemed she was quite confident in their bond to be jealous, and well every time Akira’s mind was swinging towards other girls she just gave him lewds to rewrite his mind, quite a powerful strategy I’ll have to say. She called Akira pervert few times... who was it that got totally naked like 3 times when giving Akira saliva? I really liked her scissors’ techniques, although mc didn’t seem to share my passion. She reminds me of these stray cats, that you have to approach really slowly in order to feed, coz otherwise they run ~well minecraft ocelots basically~  Every time she was about do some sports I thought for myself that she cannot do it ~coz she seems too much like the chuunibyou type~ then realized she was actually really athletic... it happened like 3 times or more, it was annoying, brain just doesn’t learn. I think I covered pretty much every thing I planned on covering and forgot what I wasn’t supposed to, so I cannot really continue writing anything now that I have no clue whether I already wrote it or not... ~splitting post and writing it with 3 day gap seems like pretty stupid thing to do~   +2,5

finally my soul’s in peace

[seigaku9th-blog]

japan week three ➜ FATE/grand order & jinro game

kicking off the week with double sana content!! as well as reo & shuuti ❤ this post contains spoilers for both FGO and jinro game.

FGO was quite a strange experience compared to the other shows and events i’ve been to, as the theater was filled with fans of the gaming/anime franchise, and not of actors or theater. i had a pleasant meeting with a girl who was also looking for the way to access the theater tho! i did enjoy the fate/zero anime from a few years ago so i kinda have enough knowledge of the franchise to discuss it www

however i got really unlucky with my seat, as i was in the second to last row ((i feel like i can’t complain when i have amazing seats for everything else but...)) and was surrounded by smelly guys who hid part of my view despite my own height... help i just want to see my boys and my girls i didn’t ask for this otaku immersion... on top of that i feel like people weren’t as familiar with theater etiquette and kept getting up to go to the washroom in the middle of the show and the like...

so, yeah, that made the experience SUPER weird, but!! it also made me even more proud to overhear & see these people who know nothing about actors complimenting the guys hehehe...

okay, on to the production itself!! i was obviously interested in seeing it thanks to the great cast of actors. sana and reo aside, takahashi yu, who plays saber, has been one of my favorite lady actresses since the olden days of kamen rider kiva, so it was such an honor to see her perform. she was so gorgeous and cool and regal and powerful... kento (A yanagi) was also super handsome, hearing his extreme lisp/potato in mouth voice in person made me very emotional okay. and talking about lisp, shunsuke who played aka ninger!! his costume was terrible but he was cute. i’m that one fan of ninninger so i was really happy to see him. and finally, ririka, a takarazuka graduate from the flower troupe!! she was so gorgeous and her singing... chilling. it’s always such an incredible honor for me whenever seigaku kids get to perform, and especially sing, with takarazuka actresses. my favorite boys & favorite girls. XD

oh, and this production had a double cast for the protagonist/player character? like the persona 3 stage from a few years ago, some shows featured the female protagonist and others, the male one. i hit a ticket for the show with the girl protagonist, which i ended up being happy about since her two main servants were also girls, so it was really cute to see them together. (and there was absolutely no heterosexual content at all, something that worried me and would worry anyone who has witnessed the mess that can be the fate franchise)

as for the negatives... well, i’ve never been much of a fan of projection mapping. i think the naruto stage handled it masterfully and tenimyu knows how to use it effectively and reasonably, but otherwise... yeah. and FGO went. way too far lmao. it was overwhelming, distracting, and, frankly, ugly. it just felt like they were covering up their own inability to come up with professional staging and lighting.

but when it came down to it, the actors’ performance was enough to make up for everything. i want to talk about reo first, because, quite frankly, he totally stole the show. aside from the opening & intermission numbers, his solo performance was the ONLY moment where the crowd applauded. people went wild, it was adorable. and... when i went to buy his bromide set after the show... it was... sold out... how does that even happen how did i buy kuroba mario bromides last week but now i can’t even get his less infamous son

reo sang with a voice much deeper than his usual, obviously way deeper than in tenimyu (LOL) but even deeper than in cheer danshi, too. honestly, if i didn’t have my binoculars to watch him sing, i wouldn’t have believed it was him LOL. i can’t wait for the DVD so everyone can hear this. and needless to say, his dancing was amazing. i think his number was approximately 3 minutes, but i didn’t want it to stop. i was on the edge of my seat expecting his acrobatics to kick in, and they did!! i think that was what probably impressed the crowd the most, since as i mentioned, most weren’t familiar with actors. oh and he looked sooo pretty... i really wished i had a better seat aaah.

and of course, sana in the leading role. he had three solo numbers on top of participating in group performances. if you’ve seen patalliro, then you know that sana is a wonderful singer, with that incredible low and raspy and s*xy voice... i was so happy to hear him singing more. ((i still loop his solo & duet from patalliro approximately 100 times a day and it’s been like 7 months. help))

the variety in the roles sana gets makes me so happy... his character was better than i anticipated based on his design, and i really enjoyed watching sana get so emotional, with both anger and sadness and admiration and betrayal. i feel like sana always puts a lot of drama in his acting while still managing to keep it believable and not too over the top. his acting during his final scene was especially incredible. i enjoyed watching him crawl around the stage

sana was really, really skilled at the action/swordfighting scenes as well. he moved so fluidly and it was so believable despite his big armor and all... so cool... 

i also thought he had a lot of chemistry with his co-actresses, especially takahashi yu, something that was really important considering sana’s character’s admiration and dedication to hers’. it made me really happy to watch sana work with girls for the first time in a while knowing sana is really close to his older sister and is so in touch with his own feminine side as well LMAO.

and then he died and it was great. the performance i went to actually got a standing ovation!! this is pretty uncommon for japanese theater. the cast came back on stage 3 times.

☆☆☆

jinro game!! i went into this movie with incredibly low expectations lmao, and it was definitely highly questionable and classically japanese-thing-featuring-teens-in-uncomfortable-settings... but i actually ended up having a lot of fun. once again, the acting cast really made up for everything else.

the two main girls were so cool... they were so cruel and chill about everything happening LMAO. there was a really cool twist at the end too. i think they were lesbians but it’s always hard to know what with the constant blatant queerbaiting in japanese media. anyways

i think i spent half of the movie trying to not laugh over sana and shuuti’s characters THEY WERE SOOO GOOD. THEIR ACTING WAS RIDICULOUS AND GREAT TO WATCH... i actually haven’t seen shuuti in anything since tenimyu so seeing him in such a different role was a lot of fun. there was this scene where he removed the crusts from sana’s pieces of bread and that was my favorite scene of the movie

no actually my favorite scene in the movie was sana’s entire existence. it was so funny oh my g o d. you know horror anime/games always have that one guy who’s a total asshole and kind of a creep but you somehow can’t help but love him. well. that was sana.

sana hiroki callout post: - forced a guy to lick his shoe - made a guy eat food off the floor - shoved his fingers in a dude’s mouth - made every other boy become his “dogs” - except shuuti who was his massage giving, bread crust removing manservant

oh also at some point one of his “dogs” got pissed off and beat him up and he looked really good with all the blood+bruise makeup. wow my review is extremely objective and professional isn’t it

right before he dies we find out that he’s actually been scared and anxious all this time and was just putting up a facade to defend himself in front of the others lmao. and that’s how i watched sana die a second time in two days