#i keep trying to numb myself with drugs

[lili-elbe]

g-d i wish i had just one real friend

[northwest-cryptid]

Don't even get me started on Hod, I'm not immune to Hod.

[scarlethexelove]

How about a WandaNat fic where both are slightly dark and kidnap R. R isn't too worried about it though and soon grows to actually love both of them. Maybe something angsty with a happy ending 🙂

We'll Keep You Safe

Pairing: WandaNat x Reader

Word Count: 1546

Warnings: Domestic violence, kidnapping, allusion to drugging, murder, I don't think there is much else.

Part 2 Save You

A/N: First I want to thank @abbyromanoff for the help on a bit of the story idea. I was struggling to come up with how they get to the point so thank you Abby. Hope this is what you wanted I'm not really sure how much I like this one myself but I hope you enjoy.

NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN

You run from your house. Your wife is screaming at you to come back but you don't, you just run to your neighbors house. They told you if you ever needed anything that you could come to them. So that is what you did. Tears streaming down your face, your right eyes almost swollen shut and a gash on your cheek. You cradle your right arm with your left pretty sure that your wrist is broken. 

This wasn’t the first time she hit you, but this was the worst. You said you would leave but every time you were about to she promised to change to never hit you again. All she did was give you broken promises. So this time you ran her anger being heard even as you got to the front door of your neighbors. 

You banged on the door with your left hand as you looked back, scared she would follow you. You kept knocking even as the door opened, startling you and almost hitting the woman at the door. “I-I’m sorry.” You stuttered out. 

The beautiful brunette looks at your concern and anger swirling in her eyes. “S-sh-she” you stutter more, not able to form words. “Help” your voice sounding so small, your legs giving out as pain starts to spread through your body. The adrenaline wears off making you feel the full force of your injuries. Wanda catches you in her arms slowly helping you to the ground and pulling you into her. 

“Natasha!” Wanda calls out to her wife. Natasha comes around the corner, as soon as she sees you there is fury in hers. Your face is buried in Wanda’s neck as you cry. Natasha tries to make her way past you both so that she can teach your wife a lesson but Wanda stops her. Instead Wanda passes you to her wife. Sharing a knowing look. Natasha cradles you in her arms and carries you into the living room sitting down with you on the couch. Burying yourself into her she holds you tightly as you cry continuously apologizing to her as you soak her shirt in your tears. 

Natasha shushes you as she rubs her hand up and down your back. Wanda making her way into the kitchen. A few minutes later as you start to calm down Wanda returns with a tray. A tea pot and some tea cups sit on the tray. She pours a cup for you. Natasha coxes you out of her neck as Wanda extends the cup of tea. You take it hesitantly and take a few sips. Both women give you a sad smile. 

“Honey, do you want to tell us what happened?” Wanda speaks gently as she sits down on the edge of the coffee table in front of you. You lightly nod your head before speaking. “I-I came home and Lila was pissed. S-she found the divorce papers I had hidden. I tried to tell her I wasn’t going to but she s-started hitting me. I-I ran here as soon as I could get away.” You tell the woman. “I’m scared.”

“We won’t let her hurt you again.” Natasha says. You can feel her anger but also her concern. You lay your head on her shoulder starting to feel sleepy and your body feeling numb. The pain fading away. Your body feels heavy as you try to speak again but no words come out. That is the last thing you remember before everything goes black. 

You blink your eyes open, your body feeling weak and heavy. It’s hard to keep your eyes open but you're able to look around. You are wearing different clothes which freaks you out. Did someone change you? What the hell happened? Why are you here? And where is Wanda and Natasha? All these questions run through your mind. Panic setting in.

You start to look around again. This room is not one you are familiar with. The walls are wooden and a few paintings scattered around. There is a bedside table next to the bed you are laying on. It is soft, softer than anything you have been on in a long time. One of your wifes punishments for a long time has been sleeping on the ground. You notice the water on the bedside table which makes you realize how thirsty you are. Your mouth feels as though you have cotton in it. So you reach out grabbing it, but as you bring it to yourself you drop the glass and it shatters on the ground. 

Just then the door swings open and you see a panicked Wanda with Natasha behind her. They both quickly rush towards you. “Are you ok? Did you hurt yourself?” Wanda questions quickly come up next to you grabbing your hands and looking you over to see if you have any new injuries. “Where am I? What are we doing here? Why am I wearing different clothes?” You send out a rapid array of questions to the woman.

Wanda gives you a soft look. “We brought you here.” She told you, placing a hand on your check which you flinch from before letting her touch you. “We had to get you away from her.” Natasha added as she bent down cleaning up the shattered glass. “H-her, y-you mean my wife?” You question starting to push Wanda away and scrabble out of the bed. She grips you tightly and doesn’t let you up. 

“Ow, Wanda you're hurting me.” You tell her as her grip loosens on your good wrist. That is when you realize that they have tended to your injuries and cleaned you up. “Sorry detka. We just want to keep you safe. We never want to hurt you. You deserve so much better than that woman can provide you. We just want to keep you safe and give you the love you deserve.” Wanda gently tells you, holding your hands in hers. You let yourself relax and stare at her. “She can never hurt you again.” Natasha adds sitting down next to you. 

You can’t help but admit that you have had a crush on the women since you met them, but you have a wife and they were married to each other. So you always push down those feelings, but sitting here with the woman feels just right. Natasha’s words echoing in your head which causes you to think. “What do you mean she will never hurt me again? You can’t know that. W-what if she finds me?” You quickly panic at the thought. 

“She won’t be a problem anymore Y/n I promise you that.” Natasha reassures you, but something still doesn’t sit right. “Did you hurt her?” You question the woman sitting next to you. You can see an evil glint in her eyes. “No one will ever hurt you again and no one will ever find her.” Natasha said, trying to lessen the blow to the fact that she inadvertently admitted to killing your wife. You should be scared and you should try and run from them. They did kidnap you and murder your wife but you can’t find it in yourself to do any of that. They seem to care so much about you and you wouldn’t be surprised if they actually love you. 

“I-I I don’t know what to say.” You stutter out. They have already done more for you and made you feel so safe in such a short amount of time. So you accept it. You accept that they have killed your wife and brought you somewhere to keep you safe. They have taken care of your injuries. Your wrist has been set, they cleaned your cheek. Your eye doesn’t seem to be as swollen anymore. They really care for you. 

“You don’t have to say anything Y/n we love you so much already and we just want to give you everything you deserve.” Wanda gently strokes the back of your hand with her thumb. Natasha leans in and kisses your forehead. “You mean the world to us detka.” Natasha adds. Tears spring into your eyes at their words. They do love you and they are gentle with you. A stark contrast to the life you have been living. So you let the rational part of you go and you listen to the warm feeling in your chest. Leaning your body into Natasha as she wraps her arms around you. 

You feel tired again, your body relaxing with the safety you feel for the first time in a long time. You can’t remember the last time you felt like this. As you relax into Natasha she starts to guide you to lay down. She shuffles you and herself back on the bed pulling your body fully into hers. Wanda slides in behind you and wraps her arms around your waist as she gently kisses your shoulder. 

“We have you sweet girl and we promise to never hurt you.” Natasha kisses the top of your head. Your tired eyes closing as you nuzzle into her chest. You can get used to this. Living safe and sound with two women who love and care for you. “I love you.” You whisper as you drift off into a deep sleep. 

[beatrixstonehill2]

"A lot of people ask me, 'Chloe, what's the hottest part of being a pregnant trans girl?' And I mean, there are a lot of things! First of all, my womb is technically State property, so I have no say in if I get pregnant or not. Every time my uterus is ready I'm inseminated via a small port on my side, after lots of fertility drugs, of course, which are part of my hrt routine. I'd say, though, my favorite thing is the uncertainty of birth...... My port has a tracking device. So all of my checkups and any medical-related stuff happens compulsorily wherever I am. They pull up, take off my clothes, measure me, weigh me, take breast milk samples, semen samples, ask me embarrassing questions about how often I'm having sex, masturbating, if I'm letting men smack my belly during intercourse and if not, why not?

So I can be out on a date or at work or in line at the grocery store and they'll come up to me and do this whole checkup as everyone watches, filming, gossiping about it, and my body.... It's so humiliating, having my clothes removed, or sometimes even cut off of me with scissors, as the nurses and doctors only talk to each other and never me. I just have to obey as they touch and poke my body, grabbing me, openly talking about my growth and stuff..... I can only talk if they ask me questions like 'How many men have you fucked this week?' or 'Are you engaging in any extreme bondage?' or 'Are you using drugs while you prostitute?' I then have to explain that I don't prostitute myself and they don't believe me..... Well, I mean..... OK I hook sometimes but not all the time! It's just a hobby......

Then of course they weigh me and ask me stuff like how fat I'm trying to get..... again, more loaded fetish questions..... They take milk samples as another nurse jerks me off for a semen sample. When they're done they give me a nice spank and go on their merry way, leaving me still in line or at a restaurant on a date, naked, hugely pregnant, totally embarrassed.... But of course, the real answer to the initial question is obvious.... The hottest thing? I wasn't given any way to give birth naturally, so like a growing amount of trans girls I don't get the pleasure of giving birth anally or urethrally...... I'm given C-Sections...... no matter where I am, just like my checkups.

Last time I had a guy over and I was riding him, my cock on his chest getting absolutely smashed to hell by my giant pregnant belly every time I pumped down on him. It was pure bliss, some of the best sex I had that whole week! When...... the doctor came in. They have a key because my womb is State property, so they can enter my place whenever...... They told us not to worry or bother interrupting ourselves. So I mindlessly rode his cock and he had the time of his life watching this unfold, as they smeared my belly with numbing gel and, yepppp....... And every time I slowed down they told me it was a routine retrieval, that my time was up for this pregnancy, to not 'be dramatic' and stop what I was doing....

We both came so many times, we were exhausted by the end, because after we came they'd smack my ass and tell me to keep riding. I covered his chest in so much cum, it was glorious! My balls legit felt ready to pop, picture it.... My big hips, riding a guy anally, my balls were on his groin getting smashed under the weight of my belly, full of quintuplets with every pump and thrust..... My scrotum was bruised for a week, which guys just found hot..... They slapped this gel on my incision after my babies were taken out (again, State property!), and my whole Caesarian scar was healed in like a day. Not that they bothered to line it up with my other three Caesarian scars, so my belly is gorgeous but it kinda looks like people are taking a samurai sword to my belly when I'm full term. Wait, don't give them any ideas..... Kidding! I love being a breeder for the State! And I can't wait to see how many kids get pulled out of my belly this time.... I'll try to fuck as much as I can when I'm full term, so hopefully I get to give another guy the ride of his life! ❤️"

[imweirdimjazzy]

Questions of Hell

Pairing: Alastor x GN!Reader

Description: after tiring a day, it wouldn’t be such a bad idea for the radio demon chasing you with questions spending the night, right?

Warnings: mentions of drugs and that’s about it (alastor is prick btw)

Word count: 2104

A/N: hello! This is kinda my first time posting here in tumblr so bear with me on my first post here. Also this isn’t proofread so there could be couple of mistakes here and there so I’m sorry about that. No use of Y/n. But please enjoy it! Btw this fic can be taken as romantic or platonic either could work. Enjoy! :)

For most of my human life I thought death would be simple and morbid. Once life expectancy reaches its limit for how much it can go, the body starts to get tired and the brain will shut, just as the body decomposes.

And just like that you would be dead.

I never tried hard to question the afterlife since it had gave me a headache if I had think too hard about it but I do admit I had a few times where I did think about it too hard.

I just didn’t expect to wind up as a goddamn sinner in a literal pot of hell.

I can admit I wasn’t exactly the most holiest person. I fucked up. Quite a lot of times. And I suppose that life is all about whether you be rewarded to get into heaven or thrown down to hell for punishment.

And for that I now have to deal with the princess of hell and her friends in the Hazbin Hotel.

Charlie was energetic to know that I was another guest at the hotel ready to redeem sinners and probably grab the chance to get to heaven. Seems quite ridiculous once the opportunity was handed to me. Honestly I stayed because I knew nowhere else would let me stay without paying or doing something to repay back.

Yet I got to meet some of the most interesting people. Starting with Angel Dust who was porn star himself and only seems to make it his whole personality but he sure knew how to make a party start going. He also makes anything—and I mean ANYTHING to be dirty.

Vaggie who seems to be strict on everyone and trying her best for all of us to actually have good morals. Sure, we didn’t care but we all understood she wanted for the best of us. Sir Pentious was there to spy on them because of the Vees but then accidentally liked the idea of staying and making a better change of himself.

And there was Nifty who has a certain quirk driven into her personality that was unlike everyone else but she was almost a kid just needed to be protected. Just try not to get stabbed by her. Husk who seems to tell everyone to fuck off even though he’s bartender and you’re sitting at the bar specifically wanting a drink. He acted he hated everyone, but he never really did. He just hated someone who seems to fake who they actually are.

And I’m guessing that’s why he isn’t particularly fond of Alastor.

Alastor is a unique demon. To say in a short sweet way to not say any bad word on his name. Yet it’s hard to say he’s quite a mystery to all of us. Charlie might own the hotel but Alastor is faculty manager of the hotel. He’s always looming somewhere in here and always there with an eye to watch us.

I have to admit I even avoid him. His presence was kind I never had bump into, I rather make it stay that way.

My legs had grown numb and heavier as I kept walking back to the hotel. I was exhausted from Charlie’s shenanigans today. Trying to encourage other sinners out there to come to the hotel and save themselves from the extermination. Failed horribly since how many either attempt to kill us, offer sex, or offer straight up cocaine.

I gave up and had left Charlie with the others to keep going. It was getting late either way and they were planning to go into club.

Didn’t want to get myself into too much trouble anymore either way.

Pushing the doors to let myself in the hotel—I had let out an exhale that I had held all day. My body was slumped and all I could think was my comfy bed.

“My, my, you look quite a mess dear!”

The radio voice had made me slightly jump out of my skin.

To the right of me I could see Alastor sitting on a couch in the lobby. One hand with whiskey in a glass cup and the other with a book. His legs crossed with one leg on top bouncing to the sound of jazz playing background.

“Alastor?”

“Didn’t expect a fellow like me up around this hour, but I couldn’t resist such a great novel here wouldn’t you say?”

He made that little hum that sparked a few radio statics in his voice.

“Look, if you’re here to mock or annoy me today I make sure those antlers of yours are gonna be long gone before you know it.”

Alastor laughed and got up with swift movement with his cane. That smile was almost stitched to his face every glance I took of him. I expect there won’t be a day where I don’t see that venom smile of his.

His hands clasped in front of him as he eyed me down. “Now why would I do that? I merely checking up on is all.”

He said it with such a smirk in his voice.

“Sure, whatever, do what you want I guess,” I grumbled under my breath.

Attempting to head upstairs, Alastor tried to get in my way as he kept reappearing in front of me in every corner I try to go.

“What the—“

“Ah, ah, ah. Where do you think you’re going?” A playful tone was layered into his voice. Letting out chuckle as his antlers move just for a second.

He knew it was getting on my nerves.

“To my room. Is there something that you want?”

I was a bit hesitant when I first spoke, especially since Alastor was a type of demon who never necessarily wants nothing out of someone except manipulation.

He makes that same hum again, letting out a sing-song voice. “Well, I’m bored and I’m in the mood of doing something.”

“Okay—kill someone or some deer.”

I tried again walking away but he reappears again in front of me on the steps of the stairs. Keeping his eyes on me as he leaned on the handrail of the stairs. I could tell from his eyes that my annoyance was kicking the roof by now.

“Not really in the mood for that kind of fun tonight dear. I was actually hoping to maybe play some sorts of game with you.”

“A game?” I questioned.

“Yes! Just any sort of ordinary game. A game where I can ask questions about you and you have to answer them.”

I blinked at him for a moment and then narrow my eyes.

“So you’re interrogating me.”

“No, nonsense! Now, come on, sit on the couch and make yourself comfortable.”

Alastor nudge me downstairs and I follow him. I had no choice and I rather didn’t wanna push any limits with radio demon exactly. He wasn’t the type to be messing around.

Suspicion was written all over my face as I sat down.

Alastor offers whiskey in a glass with a smile. “Whiskey, dear?”

“Um—-no, no thank you.”

He sets the glass on the side table along with the book. Peering to my side I notice the book was the classic Dracula book.

Alastor sat on the other end of the couch. A leg propped on the other. Resting his chin on his hand on the arm rest.

“Now, I’ll start of the with an easy question to start off soft,” stated Alastor. “Do I annoy you?”

“Yes. Next question.”

His smirk grew wide yet his eyes narrowed down on me. Letting out a laugh that sounded for sure forced but as well annoyed.

“Okay, let me ask an easier question. What is your favorite color?”

“Oh well um—maroon. Maroon is my favorite color.”

Alastor hummed to himself. “Quite an unique answer. Didn’t take you as the type to like color such as maroon.”

“Red or maroon. I just like good color of red. Next question.”

Alastor tapped his fingers along the arm rest as he thought of another question to ask.

“What’s your favorite time of day?

Looking back at him with a tilted head I raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

Alastor rolled his eyes jokingly and chuckled, seeming slightly amused of me. “I mean exactly what I said. What is your favorite time of day? Mornings? Afternoons? Nights?”

He lists off with this condescending tone, as if he spoke to me as a child.

“Watch your tone, and watch your ears, deer,” I hissed. But since you’re so damn curious. It’s night. And sometimes late afternoons. Not as much anymore though. I love them more in human life.”

“Human life you say?”

Alastor watches me as I adjust the black turtleneck I wore.

“Next question please.”

Alastor didn’t say anything but made a louder hum as he thought. Still overbearing me with annoyance of course.

“I’m running out of quite a lot of questions here but I suppose I should’ve asked this first, how are you liking this hotel so far?”

The tone switches and audibly notices it. Turning into this nonchalant tone. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to be curious or crack me under pressure with his eyes seeming to only stare at me.

With a sharp inhale I spoke direct.

“Annoying as fuck. I never was too fond of the idea of redeeming since it was hard to wrap my head around the fact that sinners here can even get the chance to go up to heaven with the rest of angels.”

He kept silent with his smile but I kept continuing.

“I didn’t think it would work. And I still have mixed feelings about it but…I do have to admit I kinda like the friends I made here.”

His eyebrow raised and he tilted his head almsot intrigued of what I had said. “I see. And these friends you’ve made here..”

His smile twisted into a smirk as he leaned forward slightly, his elbows on his knees.

“Any particular ones you admire the most?”

It was a question that had me actually thinking this time around and I knew it was a way for Alastor to get to me, and I didn’t want him too.

“Well, each person has their own unique thing to admire.”

He tweaks his head to the side and only narrows his eyes. Still with smile.

“Charlie can be a lot and maybe too hyper, but she’s willing to give people a chance. Vaggie pushes everyone and is harsh but does it for us to get better.. Sir Pentious is someone willing to give up villainous tendencies. Angel is…well Angel but he is a friend that is loyal and would do anything to back up friend.

Husker and Nifty are the same as well. All of them have everything to admire about.”

Alastor listened intently on how I spoke each of the hotel residents living here

“Interesting. Very interesting.”

He sat back once again, his legs still crossed and his hands back in his lap. Alastor chuckled again, looking at me for a moment.

“And what about me? Is there anything you admire about me?”

I scoffed and smirk a little.

“A bit full of yourself are you?”

His eye twitched a little and seemed ready to respond, but I quickly added on.

“You always stay in control. Even if you aren’t or you’re not wanting to, you always are. You piece of shit who certainly earn a spot living here. I’ll give you that, but even I can admit that you’re intelligent in what you do. Even how manic and evil it can be.”

Alastor chuckled again. He was quite amused by my words. That wasn’t what he was expecting, but he was satisfied by it. He leaned forward a bit again, resting his arms on his legs. His elbows on his knees once again as he stared right into your eyes with his permanent smirk.

“How observant you are my dear. I thought you’d think of me as a annoying bastard”

“No, I also think that too.”

A smile spread on my lips as genuine the pit of fire in hell and before another word had slipped out of Alastors mouth, a rush of familiar friends came through the door.

“I need fucking a drink what the hell was that!?” Angel's voice rang through the hotel and same with others.

I laughed and got distracted by them as soon they called for me but Alastor sat on the couch there observing the others.

Asking himself many questions of himself now.

For how much this sinner might’ve made him rethink his plan.

[rjunswrld]

you know you like it.

johnny x thick POC! reader

shibari, oral (receiving), overstimulation, mentions of gagging and saliva (yum)

“don’t move” silence came from your end as your eyes watched him (as if you could) carefully seeing how he reached to fasten the rope behind you keeping your limbs in contact, it was hard to move feeling the rope stick to your skin it was no use, on the other hand, you tried your hardest to swallow as much saliva before it slid out of your mouth onto the ball gag to drip down your chest making such a mess.

"too tight?"

you shook your head 'no' giving you a sly smirk as he pet your head. he gently turned you around to have your rope-covered body facing away from him leaving him to stare at your bare back and bottom; he was drooling at the sight. when you, his innocent and very shy girlfriend approached him wanting to try shibari with him who was he to deny? he sat down watching tons and tons of videos on how to properly do it, using one of the many huge teddy bears he had gifted you in the past to master the patterns and to do it correctly without hurting you.

it took him about 2 weeks to get it right.. he was dedicated to it getting hard at the thought of you being completely helpless and retrained on the bed for him- it was better than he had ever imagined. running his hand down your body feeling both the rope and your soft burning skin following the dips of your body along with the now super prominent curves, so delectable he wanted to devour you.

"you should see yourself right now love.."

he placed you down gently to where you were now laying on your tummy with your ass in view exposing everything to the older who groaned at the sight of your cunt. he placed his large hand over one of your ass cheeks giving it a firm slap making you jolt and whimper; this was gonna be fun.

he repeated the action earning more gasps and whimpers that grew louder the harder he would impact you, leaving a dark red mark behind you trembling with chills coating your skin at the burning numbness covering your lower body.

"beautiful" he enjoyed watching your ass jiggle every time, he enjoyed all the sounds escaping you and seeing you like this gave him just another reason why to enjoy it even more, expect a million 'thank you's' from the male after this is over. he let his hand rest on your sore ass cheek creeping closer and closer to your sopping hole, fluttering as he ran his thumb over your hole to tease. he spread you apart to get a good look at you he adored your pussy with his whole heart, he would find himself between your legs eating you out almost every hour of the day just to get a taste of you, a taste that became a drug to him.

"god love.. i don't know if i can control myself any longer.."

he promised he would drag out the foreplay as long as possible so the both of you could enjoy this new experience longer.. he was trying, honest! but when he saw you approach him in the room dropping your robe leaving your naked exposed body for all to see, handing him the rope, and telling him to get to work.. he was gnawing on his inner cheek trying to keep himself from fucking you like a mad man.

you whined at his words wiggling a little trying to get him to do something with the throbbing pain between your legs. letting himself go he leaned in to connect his mouth with your pussy, you moaned as your mouth was covered with saliva, drooling onto the pillows with your eyes shut to fall into the feeling of johnnys tongue licking at your bud perfectly. you wanted to speak and form words to your lover but due to the ball gag in your mouth, there were restrictions.

he used both of his hands this time to spread your ass cheeks apart to get a better angle for your pussy to eat. you squirmed with no use since you stayed in the same place, he had a tight grip on you keeping you close hearing you let out muffled pleas and calls of his name as he proceeded to stimulate your clit. feeling his thumb making its way inside of you as he greedily had his way with you, holding onto you as if you were a bowling ball grinding down on the bed below him to keep his cock tamed enough to have at least a few orgasms rip through you this way.

replacing his thumb with his index finger instantly pumping in and out of you just how you liked, he was drunk off the taste and sight of you he couldn't think of any better way to spend his friday night honestly. "please cum for me baby wanna taste you.. need to taste you.." he spoke desperately as he added his middle finger into you, curling them at the perfect angle licking you; not missing a single beat of his built up rhythm he had set, he wanted all that you could give him.

"yes baby yes cum for me.."

you trembled with a squeal erupting from you as your orgasm hit you like a truck, clenching and unclenching around his fingers as his tongue licked you feverishly moaning at your juices that dripped down you never coming to a halt as you squirmed and jolted due to the overstimulation kicking in. the way your body had no access to moving away from him or to push him away he smirked hearing those pretty little wails coming from your gagged mouth

"m'sure you can give me more right love?"

tonight was gonna be a long night.

⭐︎

[moonlightspencie]

and i’m not how you hoped

Description: “forgive my northern attitude, oh i was raised out in the cold”

Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!Reader

Warnings: drugs (reader smokes weed), alcohol consumption, past loss of a child

Word Count: 4.4k

A/N: might write a part 2

playlist here!

Things had been weird. That much was for certain. We both knew there was something happening between us that neither of us wanted to address. Until we did.

What followed were a couple years of… not bliss, but the closest thing we could get to it. He was good to me; too good to me much of the time, if you ask me. But it worked. It was good and comfortable and entirely natural to us.

Though, as I always tended to do, I had to find a reason why it wouldn’t last.

Most of the time, he could reason with me. He was really good at that, actually. Being reasonable, and knowing me well enough to use what makes me tick against me in order to keep me from self-sabotaging.

But, as things always do, it changed. Now, something was weird again. And it was something I didn’t want to talk about. It was something he’d try to figure out, but never quite get.

I sat at the table in our motel room. We went on a case that weekend after Sam had seen something online about a possible werewolf. He’d tried suggesting it as a way to get us to let him help regardless of his still-healing broken arm. All that came of it was us leaving him behind to take care of it. And we did.

I’d gotten into bed, expecting Dean to meet me there after his shower. But, my body seemed to know something was off before I did. I woke up an hour later to see the impala missing.

So, I sat at the table. Waiting.

“You’re back late,” I noted, not looking up.

I didn’t need to. I could smell alcohol and stale cigarette smoke rolling off of him. He’d been at the bar all night, that wasn’t a secret. I just wished I didn’t have to hear him lie about it.

“I needed to go for a drive.”

I looked up at that, simply raising a brow. We both knew he didn’t really mean that. Sure, he’d gone for a drive. But I knew that he’d be going back for the impala in the morning when he thought I wasn’t awake.

He shoved his hands in his pockets, looking down at his shoes.

“Sorry.”

I nodded. “I know. Just go shower.”

He shuffled into the motel bathroom, closing the door quietly behind him. I settled into bed again shortly afterwards, letting myself drift off the sounds of the water hitting shower tile. I woke in the early morning hours, his bed already empty.

I turned over, seeing the sunlight start to settle over the horizon and give a warm glow to the earth. I cuddled further into the comforter, deciding to close my eyes until I heard the rumble of an engine, the rustling of a take out bag hitting the table, and the mattress creaking under his weight. It all happened as I had preplanned it in my head, and only after all of that did I allow myself to pull my aching body out of the bed and into a stream of hot water.

I closed my eyes, letting it wash over me and bring relief to all of the parts of me that were battered and bruised on the case. Getting slammed into a wall was seldom a fun time. At least this place actually had some water pressure.

We drove down the road in silence, and I stared out the window. He tried a few times to strike up a conversation, but I couldn’t bring myself to speak more than a few words.

Things had been off for a long time. He knew it. I knew it.

It started when I raised concerns about his habits at the bar. It scared me sometimes how he’d drink until he was numb. He’d get back and pass out until the morning. He’d wake up half human. I hated the cycle of it.

But, really, it was more than that. I knew how he was.

What scared me most was that he’d started talking about our future. He’d started planning for when we were done hunting, or at least when we only took smaller cases to pass the time. He told me he wanted to marry me. Not in some big, fancy wedding. He said he wanted our family there, blood and found. He told me I didn’t have to wear a white dress if I didn’t want to, but that he’d love to see it if I chose to do it.

He told me he wanted kids eventually.

I didn’t know what to say at the time, and weeks later I still couldn’t figure it out. There was only one solution in my mind to it all.

“Alright, that’s enough,” he sighed, pulling to the side of the road and whipping the car into park. “Why are you being like this?”

“Like what?”

“Don’t act dumb. You know exactly what.”

I huffed out a breath. “I can’t do this anymore, Dean.”

He was physically taken aback, his stare on me unwavering. He shook his head in disbelief as I tried not to notice.

“Can’t do what, exactly?”

“This. All of it.”

He reached out, a warm hand on my arm.

“Baby.”

“I can’t do it. I can’t lose you. I can’t watch something out there finally get to you. Or Sam. I really can’t watch you drink until you’re dead.”

“I’m doubt that’s going to be the thing to kill me.”

“It’s been every night, Dean. You’re sneaking out to do it.”

“I’m sorry, okay? But I’m not going to kill myself with a beer.”

“That’s not my point, Dean.”

“Whatever the hell your point is, you knew me before we got together. What changed in the past few months other than the fact that I told you I want to be with you for real?”

I sighed, my eyes scanning over my hands in my lap. He knew his answer, regardless of how much I tried to hide it. Part of me hating his method of self-medicating, that’s for sure. But a much larger part was scared of how much I loved him, and even more how much he seemed to love me. The way he could see through me so easily told me as much.

“I thought,” Dean started, shaking his head as he glanced away.

“You thought,” I said, almost as a confirmation that a thought is all it would be.

I watched him as he looked out the window. My heart was pounding in my chest. I knew I was being harsh, but I always told him to be careful getting too close to me. We’d both known too much loss.

“I tried telling you it wouldn’t work, Dean.”

He snapped his head towards me. “So that means you’ll shut me out the second we really get close to— to something real?”

I let out a breath, not able to bring myself to respond.

“Say something! Anything,” he pleaded, trying to mask his pain with anger. It didn’t work well.

“You don’t know what I’ve—”

“Dammit, then tell me,” he said, voice raising even more. “How am I supposed to know if you don’t say anything?”

“Try telling yourself that, Dean,” I replied before I could think.

“The difference is that I’ve opened up to you.”

I fell silent at that, taking a slow breath. He kept his eyes on me through it all, knowing he’d bested me on that point.

“I can’t lose anyone else,” I said quietly.

“You think I don’t know what that’s like?”

“Not like I do,” I stated firmly, looking at him with glassy eyes. “You know part of how I got into all of this.”

“What else?” he asked, voice growing quieter.

“I was twenty, settling down finally after breaking things off with my boyfriend at the time,” I began.

“Right. You were with your parents then.”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “Uh, but what I don’t tell anyone is that I was pregnant when I moved in with them. That’s why I moved in with them, actually. I could’ve taken care of myself, but I needed help with the baby.”

His faced dropped, and he reached his hand out to hold mine on instinct. I gave it a soft squeeze, appreciating the grounding he gave to me in that moment. He always knew how to calm my nerves, though this time even his hand engulfing mine only provided a tiny amount of comfort.

“Did…” he started, sighing softly. “Did you lose the baby?”

I shook my head, and his hand squeezed mine a little tighter. I didn’t dare look in his direction, turning my eyes outside the window. I looked at the trees blowing in the wind, the clouds passing by, and pretty much anything else that would take my attention away from what I was about to say.

“I had the baby. Her— her name was April,” I stuttered out, quickly wiping away tears as they fell with my free hand. “We got to spend two years together. The first six months were with my parents, and we moved south after that. She was everything to me. I never knew you could love someone that much, you know?”

“I’m so…”

“I know,” I cut him off.

“If I’d have known sooner,” he said, leaving me to figure out the rest.

“Would it really have stopped you from trying?”

“No,” he shook his head. “But I would’ve understood more. I could’ve been more sensitive. I could’ve been there for you.”

“That was ten years ago. You only got to know me a couple years back.”

“That’s not the point.”

“What is the point?”

He brought my knuckles to his lips, pressing a soft kiss there.

“You deserve to have someone who’s there for you when you need to talk. Pain doesn’t just go away. Especially— Especially since that kind of pain isn’t like anything else,” he said, keeping my eyes on his.

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about, though. You couldn’t understand what I lost.”

“I could still be there for you.”

I snorted out a laugh, and he merely looked at me curiously. I shook my head before I looked at him again.

“When did Dean Winchester become the soft and sensitive one?”

“You’ve given me a run for my money on the whole ‘cold and mysterious’ thing, sweetheart,” he said with a soft smile.

“I’ve won on the unattached part, too.”

His smile faded, a more somber look taking its place.

“You’re still leaving?”

“Telling you my closest secret doesn’t mean I’m obligated to stick around. I think we both know you’re not changing your ways anyhow.”

He nodded slowly, finally dropping my hand. He looked ahead, starting the car and pulling away from the lookout point as if it were any other day.

Each day passed so slowly over the next several months.

I packed up everything I had, though it wasn’t much, and just drove. I didn’t know where to yet at the time, but I needed to clear my head before I made any real decisions. Doing it behind the wheel seemed as good a place as any.

Eventually I found myself going north. It was like a magnetized pull, I couldn’t help myself. I drove and drove until I was in front of an old cabin that I still somehow had the key to.

It was almost the same as I remembered inside. A bit further north from where my parents had lived, but still a slice of home out in the woods. It needed a little work, but then again, so did I. I figured it could be a little project that would help each of us polish up a little.

It was a slow process, but eventually the cabin looked just like it did when I was a kid. It was airy and warm in the summer. And as the fall months rolled in, it was cozy and bright from the blaze in the fireplace.

I picked up old habits as I settled into my new home, needing a little buzz here and there when I wasn’t on the occasional hunt.

I rolled up slowly, methodically, letting it take the same mental place that I knew cleaning a gun would take for Dean. I wondered if he’d be disappointed in me. I wondered if he’d take the smoke from my lips and swallow it down like it was the sweetest autumn air. I took a deep breath, clearing out that air from my head and let the routine take over.

Routine carried me from the small dining table in the cabin, out the back door, onto the wooden deck, and right into an old, rickety rocking chair. The chill in the air seeped into my bones, and I wrapped my jacket closer around my body. I could hear the quiet chirps of a few birds telling me that it was far too late in the season for anyone to really enjoy being around here. But I couldn’t help myself.

Home was home. No matter how much I’d tried to remove myself from it as a kid, I always found my way back. It felt like an odd kind of comfort now. Now that everything has changed so much.

I wondered if April would’ve liked it here. She loved the snow when it came, I knew that much. Maybe she would’ve been able to grow accustomed to a more lingering cold. I wondered what would’ve happened if we’d have stayed with my parents up north. Though I rationalized that thinking about those ‘what-ifs’ would only tear me up. I didn’t know about any of the evil in the world outside of human beings. I couldn’t have done anything better to protect her and I had to force myself to remember that.

I looked out over the small patch of land that wasn’t covered in a blanket of trees. It was overgrown, I could see that well enough. I just didn’t care all that much. I breathed in deep, letting the crisp air fill my lungs. It smelled like pine and rain, with the faint smell of the chimney smoke seeping out of the cabin’s rooftop. The wind carried much of that smell in the opposite direction, much to my dismay. I wished it would come and wash away the smell of a different type of smoke that was soon to come.

I closed my eyes, letting the breeze carry itself over my body. It was growing colder with the fire-orange sky forcing itself into nighttime. I wished the sun would stay with me a little longer. But I was born and bred into the cold, and summer sunshine was always a privilege and blessing. I couldn’t expect it to stick around forever. I put the joint to my lips.

My eyes opened slowly. I lit up the end, letting the smoke slowly fill up my body like I was a hot air balloon and it was the only thing keeping me afloat. I exhaled slowly, watching the cloud float into the sky with the rest of it’s purer siblings.

I thought of Dean again, and this time I allowed myself to indulge for more than a few moments. I wondered what he was doing. Where he was. If there was some case pulling him across the states and even further than he already was from me. I wondered if he was even alive.

Life was dangerous. We all knew that much, and it was almost a comfort. It was hard to feel unprepared for the end of all things when you could recognize that you had a much larger margin for it than most other people. But I worried less for him when it came to being torn apart by werewolves or getting his neck snapped by a demon. I worried more that the bottle would take him long before he’d have a chance to die bloody.

Dying from liver failure seemed to be a much worse fate, I thought.

But, even so, I knew that whatever he was doing, he was probably drinking while doing it. It was another kind of morbid comfort. That wherever he was, I could know that one thing wouldn’t change: he’s been and probably always will be a functioning alcoholic. The bottle would be by his side through everything. Even if I couldn’t.

Maybe Dean wouldn’t really have a right to judge me for smoking. Vices were the things that kept us going when we felt like false virtues were perpetually being forced onto us. If we kept saving the world, maybe we deserved to fuck around a little on the side.

I sat with that for a little while, letting it chill me the same way the air did until my fingers felt the heat from the end of my nightly indulgence. I decided I could go for a cigarette.

Winter came in fast. In hindsight I should’ve known, but I hadn’t lived up north in so long. I pulled a blanket up to my chin as I settled on the couch after dinner, closing my eyes as my body warmed slowly. I’d already had my smoke for the night, and it was still in the process of settling in my body. The night was peaceful. Until there was a loud knock on my door.

I got up quickly, taking my gun from the side table and walking slowly towards the entry way. Nobody was supposed to know I was here, and I certainly wasn’t expecting visitors. I kept my gun behind the door, ready to pull it on whoever stood on the other side.

The door creaked loudly as I pulled it open, but the sound of my heart in my chest was much louder when I saw who was standing on the other side.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he said quietly, giving me a lopsided smile.

I let out a breath. “Hey.”

He sighed softly, looking past me into the cabin. I could see in his face he was sizing up the place, trying to see if I was safe enough here. That brain of his was always working, even when it was covert like this. Something people never seemed to see with him.

He’d always been undercut by everyone who knew him. Sammy was the smart one, Dean was just the muscle. But he was so much more than that. He was practically a genius in his own right. The amount he knew about various gods and monsters would blow most other hunters out of the water. All he’d seen and knew amounted to more than someone who spent all their time in a library. I knew that from firsthand experience. He’d shocked me time and time again with all of the facts he’d be able to pull out of thin air.

I stared at him as he took me in, too. He was sizing me up just as much as he’d done to the house. Trying to figure out if I’d been taking care of myself. He had a special talent for reading me in that way.

“How’ve you been?” he finally asked when he had his suspicions in place.

I shrugged. “Same old.”

“You look good.”

He could still make me blush. I stepped backwards, opening the door further.

“Do you want to come in?”

He nodded. “Please.”

I watched him as he walked past me, looking around the place.

“This is nice,” he stated at last, then looked back at me with a soft smile. “Where’d you find this?”

“Uh, it was a place Bobby helped my dad find years ago. I was just a little kid, but this place… It was like Disney World-equivalent.”

He laughed. “Screwed up standards we’ve got. This still looks like magic to me.”

I walked nearer. “It is.”

He fell quiet, giving me that same old look. It never got old, the way his eyes softened and his lips formed the slightest smile. It was almost imperceptible, but I could always tell when it was there.

“I needed to be back home,” I said, glancing around like I was seeing it all with new eyes. “It’s good for me.”

“You always talked like it was the greatest place in the world. I kind of always thought you’d end up back here. At least back in Wisconsin,” he shrugged. “I’m happy for you.”

I put my hands in my pockets. “You thought I’d come back here?”

He nodded. “Yeah. Felt kinda… Like it was supposed to happen. Not fate, just—”

“Inevitable?”

“Yeah.”

He crossed his arms over his chest, something clearly on his mind. I looked off towards the fireplace, noting how it had started to smolder rather than burn. That just wasn’t right.

I walked over abruptly, throwing a few fresh logs onto the pile, standing and staring until it was in a comfortable blaze once more. I let myself feel the warmth through my clothes for a few minutes.

I turned towards Dean again eventually, seeing him still in the same spot like he was stuck in time. I called him over, telling him to get warm by the fire. The winter months weren’t always kind this far up in the state, and he was clearly feeling the chill.

He came to stand next to me, his arm just barely brushed mine, but it still managed to send a spark all the way through my spine. Some things never changed, at least. He held out his hands, letting the fire’s warmth creep all the way up and through his clothes. He let out a soft breath, enjoying the blaze.

“It’s cold up here,” he stated.

“Always told you I grew up cold. Sun sets around 4:30, and the snow comes in hard.”

“What about in the summer?”

“Sweltering and beautiful.”

He laughed quietly, shaking his head after a few seconds. I gave him an amused smirk, looking up at him.

“What are you laughing about?”

He shrugged. “Grew up cold, but it’s still sweltering and beautiful. Just sounds a lot like you.”

I swallowed, not responding. We stood at the fireplace a minute longer before I finally found words to say. Probably the wrong ones.

“You smell like the bar,” I stated quietly.

“You smell like smoke,” he retorted.

I hummed. “Not much else to do up here in the dead of winter.”

I walked towards the couch, settling into the cushions and letting my body melt. He watched me as I did, waiting until I was comfortable to sit beside me. He let out a long, soft sigh.

“You could always come back. Hunt with us.”

I didn’t respond. Once again.

I saw him watching me out of the corner of my eye. His arms were crossed over his chest, but even with his guarded appearance, I knew he was desperately wanting to open up. There was something on his mind, I just couldn’t quiet tell what it was.

“We miss you,” he said at last. “It’s not the same without you. And I don’t want to pull you away from all this, I just—”

He let out a breath again, though this time it was much heavier. I took a chance and turned my head to see him in full. He no longer looked all calm, cool, and collected. I could see it in his face. He was deeply uncomfortable with what he was saying, but he couldn’t quite stop himself from saying it anyways. He swallowed, looking down at his hands in his lap before he continued his thought.

“I’d really like it if you could come with sometimes. You don’t have to stay all the time, but I— me and Sammy… We just really miss you.”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, Dean.”

He nodded solemnly, fidgeting with his hands in his lap. I watched him for a moment, only speaking when I realized he wasn’t planning on saying anything else.

“I’m better off here. Sometimes I’ll grab a case if it’s nearby, but I’m pretty much as out as a hunter can get right now. And besides, everything that happened with…” I trailed off, looking away when he turned his head towards me. “Well, you know.”

He swallowed. “I know.”

We were quiet for a moment, a million thoughts running through my head and probably his. He looked at me for a moment.

“What changed?”

I raised a brow. “What didn’t?”

He smiled to himself a little, tilting his head down almost shyly. It still sent butterflies fluttering in my stomach when he smiled like that.

“You never really wanted to leave the life. Now you kind of have.”

I nodded slowly. “Yeah. I don’t know, I guess it just— Hunting all the time like that just isn’t for me anymore, I guess. Things change.”

He sighed softly. “You know, I really don’t drink much anymore. I did tonight, but that’s mostly because I was terrified to see you.”

I looked at him, catching his eye quickly. I didn’t know what to say, and it was clear after a moment that he didn’t either.

“Where’s Sam?” I asked after another beat of silence.

“He stayed behind. Wanted to give me some space.”

I nodded.

We both turned, looking into the flames of the fireplace for a while. It was quiet again, but a bit less uncomfortable, now. He breathed slowly, the rhythm of his chest rising and falling calming me down. Several minutes passed just like that. Peaceful silence.

I felt the cushion he was on shift a bit eventually. Little by little his hand moved towards mine. And I let it happen. I even opened my hand to his when his palm finally covered my fingers entirely.

I heard his breath change at last, one big sigh let out, as our fingers intertwined. I’m sure my breath sounded a tiny bit erratic, but I’m certain the effects of the weed were helping to calm any nerves I’d be feeling. That what I tried telling myself, even as I turned my head towards him and opened my mouth to speak.

“Do you need someplace to crash?”

“No, I have a room.”

I breathed in. “Will you stay anyways?”

He froze up for a few seconds. Then…

“Always.”

[drferox]

The ✨Joys✨ of Kesimpta

(With a medium amount of sarcasm).

Kesimpta is a monoclonal antibody named Ofatumumab which targets the B cells of my immune system to discourage them from demyelinating my spine and brain. It’s a very targeted therapy, these artificial antibodies only target one protein, and yet the side effect profile continues to be an interesting and unpredictable experience.

But firstly: does it work? Yeah, pretty well so far. Minimal progression, actually some improvement across most symptoms, and I will willingly trade the one day a month or so of side effects I have to endure for the medication that will hopefully keep me functional as long as possible. I will probably never go back to performing surgery, and there are bad days here and there, but the burning arm pain doesn’t happen anymore and the numbness is generally restricted to just hands, not the whole limb.

The side effects though, they have been… interesting. They’ve certainly lessened over time as I adjust to the medication, but it’s such a random grab bag of effects.

You get warned when you start this medication that it will cause a bit of a headache, so to take some Panadol. But what happened for me:

First two hours after the injection - nothing happened at all

Then the migraine came, plus heavy fatigue.

Then the shivering started, I had chills so bad that I was filling hot water bottles with boiling water to hug in my bed, because it was the only way I wouldn’t tremble constantly.

Then came the gastro signs, while I still had the chills.

Unrelenting insomnia approximately 12 hours after the dose.

The chills dissipated overnight but the nausea continued the next day, plus dizziness and exhaustion.

And I got to do that once a week for the first few doses, so I was pretty much non functional other than keeping myself alive at that point.

Over time, the side effects have been steadily less and less though. If I’m a little bit unwell in some way before a dose, the Kesimpta will exaggerate the symptoms, and I try and time the dose so I can sleep through most of the nausea and headache. I’m usually a bit off balance for most of the day, not enough to be a fall risk but aware enough that I am not right enough to drive and definitely shouldn’t climb a ladder.

But I still get these completely bizarre mood swings. I can go from being okay to crying over a sad thought in about 20 minutes, over no meaningful stimulus. I’m watching myself react this way and just have to ride it out, but there’s no way I could go to work on a medication day. People will think I’m insane or on a recreational drug.

So I have to take the day as a scheduled maintenance day.

Being on this medication has made me very glad for the Medicare system we have in Australia, and the pharmaceutical benefits scheme which subsidises the cost of a lot of medications through the government.

Without these systems, Kesimpta would be costing me about $2.5k per month. As it is now, it costs me about $60 a month, delivered, and I get a handy little ap that reminds me when my dose is due, and will send me an email or text message if it thinks I’ve missed a dose, steadily getting more frequent so that I will get a text message every hour as a reminder if it thinks I’ve forgotten.

[jermer10]

Hello👋 i dont know if you can but, can you do a drabble of yandere Sniper [tf2] stalking and kidnapping the reader[gender neutral]? And that he keeps them locked up in his camper van?

And uhhh, if you can the reader loves him right back?👉👈

If you cant do the stockholm syndrome thing, i get it. But at least do yandere Sniper please.

TF2 yandere sniper drabbles

suggestive, gn reader | this prompt was so fun!! tysm for the ask :)

tw: stalking, kidnapping, obsession, depictions of wounds and blood, drugging, abusive relationship, reader falling in love with yandere

drabbles under the cut :P

- you were aware of his existence a long time before meeting him, and whilst you had dealt with creeps and weirdos before, this guy was....different... - waking up during the night and feeling a presence in the room, yet finding no one once the lights were turned on; catching a glimpse of someone from the corner of your eye, and turning around to see nothing - for the longest time you had felt insane! "you're just paranoid!" you'd hear from friends and family - and then you had your first encounter with him at your local cafe whilst in the lineup ordering your coffee - okay, well, you weren't certain that it was him, but the way his bluish-grey eyes bore into yours with such an obsessive, aching, needy want caused you to put two and two together - and much to your dismay, he had realized that you knew - you brushed past him, hoping he wouldn't follow you, hoping that you could make it home in time to pack a bag or two so you could stay with a friend for the night - but you only made it half way down the street before being pulled into an alleyway and feeling the sharp jab of a needle in your shoulder

- you must have fought for several minutes before finally passing out, because upon waking there were bruises and scuff marks littering your skin - the second thing you noticed once you gained consciousness was the leg of camper van pull-out table you were tied to - if you had the strength, you would have kicked the table upwards and slid your ducktaped wrists off of the leg, yet your drowsiness and the numbness of your legs told you that trying to escape would be futile - for a second you considered screaming out - someone, anyone must be able to hear you, you couldn’t have gone too far out of town - you hear the stifled laugh of a man from the other side of the van - you turned sharply to look at the man, when an overbearing wave of nausea and dizziness rushed over you. “fuck!” you hissed, squeezing your eyes shut - the man chuckled, and from what courage you could muster, you glanced up at him. he was….handsome? - ‘fucking gross y/n! don’t think that about this guy! he KIDNAPPED YOU!’ the reality of the situation had finally set in - “who are you?! where am i?! please, please just let me go and I wont tell anyone about this! I’ll give you whatever you want! please don’t kill me!” you had started to sob - through the blurry tears you saw him get up and walk closer to you, his brown boots clacking against the floor rung in your head like gun shots - “shut up. I took ya because you’re the thing I want. I’ve been followin’ you for a while and I know you know about it. I got tired of waitin’, so I made myself known, that’s all.” his face was serious, his voice condescending, as if it were obvious - you felt hopeless, pathetic, and manic. you started to scream, cry, thrash around pathetically whilst he stood over you. he lit a cigarette and blew some smoke down at you - “we are a looooong way away from any people darl’, so it would be easier for both of us if you played nice” the man spat, and walked towards the exit of the camper van, grabbing a sniper rifle out of a locked compartment in the wall - “if you’re not here when i get back, i will kill you, y/n.” and with that, he left.

- months had gone by, and eventually you had grown placid, sitting under that table on your makeshift bed day in, day out while the man you had eventually grown to know as Mundy monitored you, fed you, bathed you, and clothed you - you had gained his trust, therefore he decided it would be best to remove your constraints - while he was at work you would rummage through his belongings to find out more about him; what hobbies he had, where he was from, his likes and dislikes - you found a photo of his parents and casually asked him about them one day. he was taken aback by your curiosity, yet he told you stories about his childhood and you shared some of your own - you couldn’t even hate him anymore, you had actually grown fond of the man in your time spent with him, but there was no fucking way he could know that. you still wanted to escape from this sicko and return to your old life - but what even was your old life? your 9 to 5 job, coming home to an empty house every day, the constant feeling of being watched with no one to believe you - suddenly your situation seemed a lot better than what you were previously stuck with - that night you had awoken, startled by a wounded and bloody Mundy stumbling through the camper van doors. “holy shit, are you okay?” you hated how it came out so earnestly - luckily for you, the concern had seemingly gone unnoticed as he had sat himself on the floor next to you, peering into your eyes for some kind of permission with a guilt and bashfulness you hadn’t seen from him thus far - you didn’t know what to do or say, so you nodded slightly, and on cue he pressed himself into your side, burying his face in the crook of your neck - he smelt like cigarettes, dirt, and gore - you didn’t ask, and he didn’t tell, but you knew he had a hard day at work. no matter what his job was, you knew all too well the feeling of coming home after a shitty shift and sobbing into your pillows. you often wonder if Mundy ever saw that side of you, sides you hadn’t shown anyone - you held each other in this awkward side hug for what felt like both hours and seconds, you honestly didn’t want to let go, but he was still bleeding out and you had been dirtied - “wanna shower?” you asked chastely. it felt uncomfortable asking your captor for something so….sweet? he glanced at you, attempting to hide the shock in his face - “yeah, okay.” he mumbled, slowly letting go of your warmth and standing up shakily, you followed in suit and head into the cramped bathroom

- by this point you had already been naked around Mundy, he refused to let you shower by yourself and most days you had been so exhausted you had looked forward to him washing you - but you had never caught a glimpse of what was under his work uniform or the red plaid pyjama slacks and white t-shirt he wore around the van, and a small part of you was nervous, but a huge part of you anticipated the reveal - you stripped yourself and climbed into the tub, chin resting on your knees, hugging your legs, and staring up at the tall, lanky man - a red tinge glossed his dirty face, clearly this was a vulnerable spot for him, and you couldn’t help but respond with your own red cheeks in turn - “….are you jumping in or what…?” you couldn’t look at him, the only sound louder than the thumping of your heart in your chest was the water spilling from the tap filling the tub - “ah- yeah just uh, gimme a second,” he murmured, removing his jacket and unbuttoning his top - his chest and back were scarred, some old, some new. you felt a pang of sadness. the irony of this situation was not lost on you, feeling more remorseful over hating this man than he does for kidnapping you, but you couldn’t help it. he was so raw, so genuine - he had stripped bare, and climbed into the tub facing away from you, handing you a bar of soap, you absentmindedly washed his back, it felt all too natural to you, maybe it was the steam of the shower, maybe it was the exhaustion that came from sleeping on the cold, hard floor of the camper every night with nothing but a blanket and pillow to keep you comfortable, but something about being here now, with Mundy, felt so right - “I think I’m in love with you,” you spoke softly, so softly you were sure he couldn't even hear the whisper, and before you could react, Mundy turned and pulled you into a rough kiss. you melted into it, running your soapy hands through his auburn hair. eyebrows furrowed and face burning, he pulled away - “wanna sleep in my bed tonight?"

[galaxywarp]

Here’s my working theory about what happened to me.

I was mostly stagnant for most of last year. A lot of bad stuff happened to me at once. Grandma died. Little dog died. I lost my job. I moved. And I was trying the whole time to stay clean, with my brain slowly healing for months from the longterm effects of me abusing it with meth and heroin.

But those drugs were also keeping me numb from everything I needed to process, emotionally. And now I didn’t have them. And for like 8 months I just sat and I ROTTED.

I barely got up out of my bedroom. I went between sleeping for days to being awake for days just doing nothing. Feeling hardly anything. Not really talking to anyone. Not even myself.

And then I finally started trying to get better. And I rode the pink cloud for a bit. And the pink cloud is very real. It’s that happiness and confidence when you first start treatment and you feel good and like you can commit to all this positive change and you’re proud of your progress.

And then I started actually feeling some of these negative feelings I’ve been running from my whole life. And I didn’t have meth or heroin to help. And I became so depressed I nearly killed myself.

But I survived. And I’ve been living in fear honestly of crashing again. I’ve been scared to say im feeling better because I’ve been having bad feels days again and what if I end up wanting to die again. You know.

But. I’m starting to wonder if this is just me going through what I need to go through. Finally crying all these tears that I was burying for six years with drugs. And it sucks and I’m sad and im angry and i feel gross and it hurts.

But. Maybe the solution isn’t to turn those feelings off. But let myself feel them. And go through them.

And it fucking sucks. It sucks that I spend the last two days crying in my closet. But you know I also went for a drive today. I made myself dinner. And drank water. And attended my psychiatry appointment. And then went back to crying. But maybe I need to cry.

Maybe it’ll be different now that I know what to expect and I can figure out how to take care of myself through these hard feelings, instead of punishing myself for them

[whorediaries-09]

can't wait 'til the drought is over;

pairing- sirius black x reader warning(s)- hurt/comfort, mentions of drugging. a/n- hopefully the ending does not disappoint!

prequel masterlist series masterlist little train.

the lotion is hot and humid on your skin. sweat crawls on your forearm, the skull burnt on your skin throbbing with pain. his fingers are cold and numb. a quiet solace in the dark room. his eyes are like stars against the contrast of the darkness.

'sirius,' you say, the name familiar on your tongue. his ears perk up at his name falling from your lips, the sound almost forgotten by his brain.

'yes?' he asks. you're full of fear. you're afraid that he cares for you so much, even after he watched you kill a man. you wonder if its a ploy. you wonder if he'll report you. but you're too tired from your thoughts. you're too tired of running, too tired of being chased.

for once, you want to believe it's a blessing in disguise.

'will you report me to the authorities?' he unwrapped his fingers from you, removing his cold touch from your hot skin. his upper lip quivered.

'all this time you've known me...and you think i'm going to report you? bullshit!' there it is again. the rage, the false accusations. you feel anger pour inside of you, as you get furious at the only person who helped you keep your calm.

'known you? i never knew you. don't you fucking lie!' he knitted his eyebrows together. he felt his ears get warm with the rage that boiled inside of him, boiling to the edge.

'you're the one who's lying.' he said, silent intimidation in his voice.

'i am the one who's lying?' you got up from the bed, throwing off the sheets from your body. your vision dizzied, but you couldn't care less.

'I AM THE ONE WHO'S LYING? ALL THOSE YEARS AGO, YOU LEFT ME. YOU DECIDED TO GO AND FUCK IT UP BY TALKING BULLSHIT ABOUT LOVING ME AND THEN GETTING IT ON WITH THAT WOMAN. I, SIRIUS, TO YOU AM ALWAYS THE OTHER WOMAN.'

and god it felt good to let it off your chest. all those years you'd spent those sleepless nights, looking for answers, looking for closure. all those years, you'd spent those years trying to fight your demons. all those years, you'd spent, trying to search for the flame of warmth that sirius lit within you.

it was finally tearing down, as he stared at your anguished form. you watched tears fill up his eyes.

'I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE! YOU FORCED ME TO LEAVE. AND DON'T BE SUCH A PATHETIC LIER, I NEVER GOT WITH NO WOMAN AFTER BEING FREED EXCEPT YOU!'

'please,' you begged, pathetically. you shook, years of suppressed emotions finally catching up to you. 'don't lie. it was the night of 14th august, at 7:28pm. i saw you crystal clear with the woman.' you curled your fingers, balling your palm into a fist. disgust churned in your stomach, putrid hatred running through your intestines.

the memories flashed in your brain like a film.

this film, you'd seen before. and you didn't like the ending.

'we'd planned a date on 14th of august. i'd asked you out, but you never came. i s'pposed you got stuck with some extra work. by the time i wanted to leave and go check on you, i'd already been caught up by the woman you're talking about. i don't remember her name, but i do know that i'd been drugged by her. because i ended up in the hospital a few hours after.'

the silent was deafening.

'what? i- i never knew-'

'of course you didn't. then i came up to check on you and i saw that you would've been killed by lucius. i saved you, and there you were shouting at me, giving me no chance to explain myself.'

'you never contacted me afterwards-'

'i thought of calling you. write you letters. but i knew you wouldn't respond. a few years later dumbledore comes bearing with the news that you were in great trouble, and i could think of nothing but you. i wanted to do nothing but prove myself and signed myself up for the mission of saving you. it was a job to be done by one, too many people would've messed up. and i saw you, on the verge of fighting death, i couldn't bear it. i couldn't bear the thought of losing you again.'

'i'm sorry.' he got up from the bed, tucking his finger under your jaw.

'i realize now, how much i love you. how much the thought of losing you terrifies me. how much i hate the fact that i love you because you want nothing to do with me. because i love you and it has ruined my life.'

he nudged his forehead against yours, warm breath falling on your lips.

'let this night be ours,' he begged. you cradled his face.

'it was always ours.' the hot salty tear fell on your cheek.

'i think i never wanted to accept it, because it was terrifying, the thought of loving someone. but i don't think i can escape it anymore. i never stopped loving you. i don't think i was never not yours.'

his nose budged against yours.

'say it.'

'i love you, sirius.'

his lips met yours. softly and ecstatically, his tongue slipped into your mouth as he kissed you harsh. harsh with the dull pain of separating. harsh with the dull pain of loving you. harsh pain of the paradox.

and even if the both of you were too close too the stars, you'd fall. fall again.

because when the sky fell, you'd face it all together.

running away from the ruins of loving each other.

****************************************

original idea posted by - @lilwnet

taglist - @reggieisfit @siriuslycaptainofthedawntreader @jamespottergf @eternallybipanicking @fictional-magic @iamgayforyourmom1510

taglist (for series) - @urbansaint

(if you want to be tagged please send a request through my inbox.)

****************************************

[yanderes-galore]

Halloween request: A Yandere!Naga seeing and capturing S/O while walking through the forest one Halloween night

Oooo! Naga time ^^ Gender neutral naga for now. New OC just dropped, meet Nilwa. Feel free to tell me if Nilwa seems male or female. I wanted to do more for them but ran out of ideas. I might add on more at a later date.

Underbrush

Yandere! Naga Short

(Halloween Event - Naga)

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Stalking, Drugging with venom, Manipulation, Obsession, Kidnapping, Licking, Forced relationship, Slight dehumanization

There's always been tales of creatures in the forest. Every town has their version of it. At this point it's become a folklore cliché.

Everyone has their own form of cryptid. For some it's bigfoot. For others maybe the chupacabra. Your town happened to have the tale of a naga.

Naga were half human and half snake. Supposedly around your town, these beasts existed. You treated such rumors with little caution. They were only rumors.

Folktales were like glorified horror stories. Just ghost stories meant to scare people into not going in the forest. You never were one to believe them.

It didn't help on Halloween night you only ever heard these stories. Like gossip, spooky tales were tossed around and spread. You wanted a break from it.

Ironically, tales about not going in the forest drove you into the forest.

You wanted a get away. A nice, calm, relaxing fall walk among the colorful leaves to ease the nerves. Honestly, it felt nice.

A long deserved rest from the rest of your town.

You were blissfully unaware of the brown scaled naga watching from the shadows. Crickets chirped as you crunched through leaves, sounds that hid the slithering naga's presence.

Gold eyes looked at you not as a tasty meal, but rather a treasure. Humans usually were scared of them. You, however, walked through this forest with a peaceful stride.

Did you hear the stories? Are you new? Or... did you just not believe that they existed?

This must be your lucky day...!

Or theirs... they didn't really care if you considered meeting a naga lucky or not.

Like an unaware rabbit, the naga sneaks up on you. By the time you turn around, their fangs are already through your neck. You can barely scream when the venom seeps through you.

"I can tell you didn't expect me here...."

Your body feels numb, causing you to stumble. A real naga... the stories were true. The snake notices you're about to fall and slithers behind you. You're caught against their chest, their long tail wrapping around the two of you.

"Humans never come here! You're as adorable as they say...!"

"Will you... eat me-?"

"Eat you...?"

They frown at your assumption.

"No! I don't want to eat a human who's the first I ever met! I like rabbits...."

They then smile, their fangs still stained in your blood faintly.

"I'm Nilwa! A naga, clearly! What's your name? The venom will only paralyze you for a little while, no worries!"

You see how eager they are. They don't seem dangerous. Not like you could fight anyways-

"(Y/N)..."

"Gah...! My cute human friend has such a cute name~!"

They coo, holding you closer like a teddy bear.

"I caught you myself... oh this is so exciting!"

They refuse to let you go as they hold you bridal style, slithering around with you.

"I heard if I catch a human, I get to keep them! I promise to take good care of you!"

You try to struggle, whimpering.

"No...!"

They pause, looking down at you.

"No? Aw... is my human scared?"

"I'm not yours!"

"Of course you are! I caught you! In the same way you catch a fish and keep it, I keep you!"

"I want to go home...."

"You'll have a home! With me!"

"No... MY home-"

They sigh, shaking their head and holding you closer.

"I refuse to give up a prize as special as you...."

Their tongue flicks across your face, nuzzling into your neck.

"You're warm... you're adorable... you're mine...."

The venom soon fully flows through you, leaving you unable to speak. Nilwa notices and grins, slithering deeper into the forest with you in their arms.

"Great! It's done! Come now, (Y/N)... I have a wonderful cave we can live in!"

They kiss your forehead as they make their journey. Perhaps they liked you like a pet? Maybe it was love at first sight.... They didn't care what it was, all they cared about, was keeping you.

"We'll be happy, I promise!"

You couldn't even cry.

[miss-celestia13]

Steal My Breath

Jake x MC Smut One-Shot

Words: 2.2k

A visit to her childhood home brings up an interesting question for Jake. “Have you ever fucked someone here?” He takes her negative response as a challenge.

It's been ages since I wrote for this, and I'm glad I managed to get back to these two. As usual, it's just a smut and love one-shot. If anyone wants to read, nothing needs to be read before reading this. There is no plot, only filth. MC's name is Manon.

Breathplay.

Manon’s POV

The clock beside her bed ticked past 2 am and she took to memorizing Jake in her old room and wondering how she had gone from being utterly hopeless to this. Having nothing but hope and joy for the future, it was a gift, and she didn't want to waste it ruminating on the ghosts.

She looked at him, admiring the firm line of his stubbled jaw and the lips she knew better than her own. He was her peace in a world of war and bloodshed. And he was the chaos and desire when their world was bright and open and beautiful.

All of him, fashioned just for her. All of her forged in fire and blood for him.

His face was oddly severe as she stroked her fingers over his thumping heart and let the heat of him ease her chilled bones. She wanted to remind herself she was alive and thriving, that no matter how hard it got, there was good waiting for her.

She had to swallow a few times. Her mouth was so dry, but she managed a silly joke.

"What are you thinking? You look like you're trying to solve a math problem in your head and you're failing," she laughed. Her earlier stress faded away under the power of his attention as he met her venom gaze.

"I was wondering..."

His lips twitched, his hand trailing over the flare of her hip and gripping her tight, the heat of him like a branding through her clothing. Concern still lurked in his gaze, but he sensed the shift in her mood and reacted in kind.

He looked at her through a fan of thick black lashes as she waited for him to elaborate.

She wasn't very good at waiting.

Manon arched a brow and said, "Yes?" When he just kept touching and touching her.

His indigo eyes blinked and locked on her, lust threading through his irises. And they were darker than they were seconds ago.

"Have you ever fucked someone here?"

Manon laughed, cackled really, "No, do you think anyone other than Steve would have made it past my dad?" With an unladylike snort, she shook her head at the mental picture of a poor, horny teen boy, rosy-cheeked and stuttering, as her dad read him his rights. She went on, "I had to fuck myself."

"But you lived here alone for a while," he reminded her.

Manon rarely ventured back to those days, even now, multiple lives away from it. She never sought those memories out of the locked wrought iron cage in the back of her hive of a mind.

Sex had been her drug to fill the numb, hollow plain where her heart used to reside. She didn't go out all the time, no, too lost in her head for that.

But when she went out, she drank just enough to feel warmed through and buzzed, seeking her target for the night.

Some nights, she left empty-handed. Often, she went home with someone. She took no one back to her place. They were one-night stands, and she just needed to feel something, not embed them in the fabric of her shattered life.

They'd discussed past loves before, and she felt no anxiety opening up about this.

"I never brought them home. They took me home."

Nothing but quiet understanding shone in his crystal eyes, a slight tightness in the corners of his closed, smiling mouth told her he wished he'd been there for her then just like she would trade all the money she had to be at his side as his world became a real life thriller without the promise of justice until she demanded it for him.

He was everything to her, and she knew she was everything to him. Like he was a trophy or a champion ring, she coveted and hoarded him inside herself to keep him safe and hers. The possessive way he touched her echoed her silly thoughts, and she wanted to feel the heaven in him meeting the hell in her.

Leave this place with a wonderful memory to ease the pain of all the awful ones.

Jake grinned like a devil as he read the thoughts on her face, his heated gaze holding her in sway.

"We're here now, and no one can stop us."

As she smirked at him, his hands pulled her in and wound around her, heat and light glittering through her as he brushed his lips over hers.

Featherlight and gentle, so at odds with how hard he gripped her hip and made her skin bloom wild with violets. She wriggled closer and laid a possessive hand on his neck. He pulled back and searched her eyes for any sign of distress, and she knew he didn't find it when the shadows in his sapphire gaze vanished.

She tilted her head, admiring the sparkle of her engagement ring as she said, "What are you waiting for?"

He instantly lunged and captured her lips in his, hungry and urgent; he kissed her until her head spun and aching want pulsing through her veins until her entire body trembled with it.

Her shaking hands laced through his hair as she swung her leg over his and pressed in as close as she could.

Manon's blood shimmered.

His wandering hand found her jaw, fingers tracing along and curling behind the bone, trailing down her neck, and wrapping around her throat to feel her pulse skittering under his fingers and thumb.

Her breathing quickened and slowed with the pressure of his hand as it tensed and relaxed, scalding, wet heat cascaded through her. Pooling between her thighs as a hollow ache opened inside her.

There was an invisible cord of love and deep trust between them, and a heady, liberating sense of having no control that ran through her. She gladly handed herself over to him. And knew he would take care of the need rising like a tide to drown her.

She whined low in her throat as sweet desperation and nerve flaying anticipation pricked over her skin like needles as his free hand wove through her hair to pull her lips more firmly against his.

His tongue slid alongside hers, bristled lips teasing and bruising her mouth as she smiled into it, greedily inhaling his arousing scent with every scant breath.

The simmering heat in her abdomen, the familiar catching sensation in her chest, and the wild thrum of molten blood in her veins. It was the most intimate and cherished thing she'd ever known.

His body aligned with hers. She melted into him and filled every hollow space between them, absorbing his fierce heartbeat as it pounded alongside hers.

How good and right and real he felt pressed into her. It was all that mattered.

He was like fire and she raised no resistance as he burned his way in. His lips seared against hers, one roasting hand splayed wide on her lower back as she wriggled until his knee parted her legs, and she sighed into his mouth, happier than ever.

There was still a slight hint of, "we shouldn't do this. We will be caught any minute." In the back of her mind, that almost made her want to laugh.

It intensified her desire instead.

The hand collaring her throat tightened. A strangled moan left her when he eased up.

All that strength — he was so very careful to leash it with her, and she took great delight in pulling at his every trigger to make him loosen his hold on himself.

He pressed his fingers into the veins under her skin, cutting off the flow of her blood again and again, creating a dazzling rush of euphoria. She felt high, so sensitive even the air whispering against her skin felt like a heated caress against her dewy skin.

They hurriedly undressed each other. No shame or hesitation. Both hungry and wanting.

He kissed every scar as he unveiled them. Hot mouth sending flares of flame spiraling through her and she grew so wet. He chuckled possessively as he dipped a finger into her soaked folds. She tasted the salt and musk as she dragged her lips across his chest as she nearly ripped his shirt from his body to get to the skin underneath.

Soon, nothing stood between but shivering anticipation and deepest, darkest desire.

His hand came up to grip her throat again, her body arching and trembling as his lapis eyes watched her every reaction. He taunted her with a gentle squeeze on her neck that restricted her breath, a single finger grazing her clit as she gasped and writhed.

She was so ready for him. So wet and hot and pliant he didn't torture her for long as he palmed his hard cock, vicious lust etched across every line of his handsome face.

He gave her an order, "Hold on tight, don't let go, Sweetheart."

Her hands instinctually lifted and grabbed hold of the wooden bedposts, arcing her body into an elegant arch as he spread her thighs wide.

She felt the head of his cock pressing into her. Thick and very hard, he pushed in. He glided through her slick cunt so fast her eyes rolled back and her knuckles bleached white on the wood as she struggled to absorb him.

Pressure and fullness. It obliterated all thought as her body acclimated to his invasion. He was holding his breath, eyes shadowed and breath short as he felt her cunt yield to him, wetness dripping from her with every tiny shift of his cock against her fiery flesh.

When he moved, it was emphatic and utterly devastating.

Forceful thrusts into her tight clasp, fingers cutting into her hips as he pulled and pushed her body with every snap of his hips.

The tension was like a screw being turned too tight inside her, twisting and twisting, tightening until her skin quivered and his name rolled off her tongue.

Heat and fire bled through her as her legs wrapped around his waist and he braced his elbows on either side of her head.

He took her mouth with the same ferocity he took her cunt with. Rapid flicks of his tongue against hers, sliding and tangling together, joined so closely they felt like one being as she shuddered and keened.

His cock grinding and jabbing deep, his groin catching her swollen clit, and his ravenous mouth all worked together to destroy and heal her.

All she felt was pleasure, love, and desire so intense, her toes curled with it.

She was moaning as he fucked her. So lost in him and the whirling flames of his lust for her, she never wanted to be found.

Jake was insatiable. Tearing moan after moan from her and demanding more with every brutal lunge of his cock inside her taut heat. She saw the black desire eating away at him. Her fingers itched to pull at his hair to feed it, but his hand came up and enveloped her throat once more.

She could only burn and feel and breathe through the incredible pleasure threatening to steal her sanity as his hand flexed.

Tension strung so tight she went rigid, her eyes flashing her distress at him as she needed more to fly off the precipice, slicing her in half. He immediately understood and nodded, silent permission that made her loosen her hold on the headboard.

She worked one hand between them, fingers soon soaked in her own essence as she circled her clit. Her other hand weaved through his hair and dragged him in, kissing him so forcefully he paused in surprise before returning her famished kiss with equal fervor.

Her swirling fingers on her clit sent embers flying through her, the tension pulled so taut she wailed as Jake rattled her with a thrust so savage she felt it in the soles of her feet.

Sweat beaded on their skin. The sharp and heady scent of her own arousal was unmistakable in the air between them. It was like a humid warmth that cloaked them both and turned their desire up to lethal levels.

Jake broke free of her mouth and sobbed her name as her cunt clenched down hard, her busy fingers pushing and pushing her to release as the skin on her belly trembled.

The sound was like a siren call to her. It slithered like a shiver through her nerves and coiled in her core to intensify the pressure of his cock filling her again and again.

He was so warm. He was hers. Her world wasn't cold with him and never would be. The thought sent her over the edge with another flick of her fingers.

Her cunt clasped his cock so tightly she took him down with her. His shocked shout bled into a rippling growl she felt between her quaking legs as release surged through her like a landslide of molten lava.

A storm of tingles and shocks burst under her skin as she shivered and shook. Her breath came in great gasping bursts as wave after wave of glittering, searing sensation rolled through her. She was mindless, lost in utter glory, and pleasure as it swamped her system so thoroughly she thought it would never end.

She was aware of herself making noise but couldn't understand a word of it as Jake kissed her to soothe her. He swallowed every twitch and sound her orgasm incited and she reveled in the feel of him still locked inside her body.

His body blanketed hers as her useless, boneless legs fell away from his waist and flopped down on the bed. She held him close, nails scratching at his damp skin and hands smoothing over firm muscles as they made their way to his raven hair.

Tiredness forced her eyes shut as he nuzzled her neck and breathed her in. She just kept holding him. She didn't let go until they woke up later that day and they began packing the things she wanted to keep.

**********************

Thank you for reading if you made it this far! Likes, comments, and reblogs are love and very much appreciated. If you feel like it, of course 🥰❤️

Links to the whole story and all my others are in my pinned post ❤️

[final-girl96]

STOLEN HEARTS: CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

SIX MONTHS LATER

EDDIE

All I have been doing is writing songs. All songs about broken fucking hearts. Yes my heart was broken, but it was more about the heart I had broken by my stupidity. I felt like I came in the dark of night and stole something that wasn't mine. I had Stolen her heart but she had stolen mine as well. That's all it was just two stolen hearts.

Midnight Thief

(Verse 1)

Sneaking through the shadows, in the dead of night

A heartbreaker on the loose, stealing love at first sight

With a glint in their eye, they strike without a sound

Leaving broken hearts scattered all around

(Chorus)

Midnight thief, stealing hearts with ease

Leaving a trail of shattered dreams and memories

No one can resist the pull of your dark art

Midnight thief, tearing love apart

(Verse 2)

Whispers in the alleys, tales of love gone wrong

The midnight thief dances to their tragic song

They move through the night like a ghostly wraith

Leaving behind a trail of heartbroken faith

(Chorus)

Midnight thief, stealing hearts with ease

Leaving a trail of shattered dreams and memories

No one can resist the pull of your dark art

Midnight thief, tearing love apart

(Bridge)

But one day the tables will turn, the thief will fall

Their stolen treasures will mean nothing at all

For in the end, love will conquer all

And the midnight thief will meet their final call

(Chorus)

Midnight thief, stealing hearts with ease

Leaving a trail of shattered dreams and memories

No one can resist the pull of your dark art

Midnight thief, tearing love apart

(Outro)

So beware the midnight thief, with their dark allure

Their reign of heartache will not long endure

For true love will rise, strong and unbroken

And the stolen hearts will be awoken

I couldn't stop. It's the only way I could keep myself sober. I got help. I went to rehab. While in rehab I started to write. Maybe all these songs are all the same. I don't know. I also don't care. It was a way to get it out and to help keep me sober. I wanted to apologize but I didn't know how. I didn't know if she would accept my apology. I had a good feeling she wouldn't. I sent her flowers every week for the past six months. I didn't expect her to call or write. I don't expect her to forgive me. I just want to show her that I'm working on myself. I'm working to clean myself up and keep it that way. Or at least I'm trying to.

Bloodstained Souls

(Verse 1)

In the shadows of the night

Where the demons take their flight

Whispers of love turn to spite

Stolen hearts in the pale moonlight

(Chorus)

Bloodstained souls in the dark

Torn apart, leaving their mark

Forgotten love, a broken heart

In the symphony of metal sparks

(Verse 2)

Crimson tears fall like rain

As the echoes of pain sustain

A metal heart, a soul in chains

Forever haunted by love's disdain

(Chorus)

Bloodstained souls in the dark

Torn apart, leaving their mark

Forgotten love, a broken heart

In the symphony of metal sparks

(Bridge)

Rage and sorrow intertwine

In the power of a screaming mind

Lost in a world so unkind

Stolen hearts left behind

(Chorus)

Bloodstained souls in the dark

Torn apart, leaving their mark

Forgotten love, a broken heart

In the symphony of metal sparks

(Outro)

In the echoes of the night

Where the darkness takes its flight

Stolen hearts forever ignite

In the flames of metal might.

I saw her the other day, walking in town. She was so fucking beautiful, it took my breath away. She always took my breath away. I realized that I haven't felt that in a long time though. I haven't felt that feeling she always gives me. That feeling where your heart skips a beat or two or five. It feels like it stops completely. I feel like I'm floating on air and time feels like it stops completely. I look at her and everything disappears.

I fucked that all up though. I was also high or drunk or both. I was also too fucked up that it started to disappear because the drugs and alcohol numbed everything. She's the only thing in my life besides my music that makes me feel anything. I always said that if I made it big that I would never end up like every other rockstar out there. I said I would never let fame get to me. I wouldn't get caught up in drugs, not with how easy it would be to get them whenever I wanted them. That didn't turn out well for me. It didn't go well for any of us.

Eternal Betrayal

(Verse 1)

In the shadows of the night, a darkness creeps

A sinister plot from within, a love asleep

Promises broken, lies spoken, hearts torn apart

Betrayal's curse, a venomous dart

(Chorus)

Stolen hearts, bleeding in the night

Echoes of deceit, screams out of sight

Eternal betrayal, chains that bind

Lost in a maze of anguish, losing our minds

(Verse 2)

Whispers of treachery, a silent storm

Betrayed by an angel, once thought to be warm

The fire in our souls now turns to ice

A shattered dream, a twisted device

(Chorus)

Stolen hearts, bleeding in the night

Echoes of deceit, screams out of sight

Eternal betrayal, chains that bind

Lost in a maze of anguish, losing our minds

(Bridge)

Beneath the veil of shadows, we search for light

But the darkness consumes us, the end in sight

A symphony of sorrow, a dirge of pain

Our stolen hearts, forever stained

(Chorus)

Stolen hearts, bleeding in the night

Echoes of deceit, screams out of sight

Eternal betrayal, chains that bind

Lost in a maze of anguish, losing our minds

(Outro)

In the realm of broken dreams, we stand alone

Haunted by the echoes of a love now gone

Stolen hearts, forever entwined

In the cruel embrace of eternal betrayal's bind

One day I will get her back. I will show her that I can change; that I have changed. I will prove to her that I can stay clean. That I can turn my life around. That I can be good for her and take care of her. Treat her the way she deserves to be treated. I took advantage of her love; of her heart.

Forged in Regret

(Verse 1)

Darkness surrounds me

My sins weigh heavy on my soul

I've broken promises

And taken a heavy toll

(Pre-Chorus)

I kneel before the gods

Begging for forgiveness

But the echo of my apologies

Falls upon deaf ears

(Chorus)

I'm sorry, for all that I've done

Regret consumes me, I can't outrun

Forgive me, for my transgressions

In the shadows of my confessions

(Verse 2)

Blackened hearts, scars that won't heal

A broken mirror reflects my pain

I'm haunted by my mistakes

Forever chained in shame

(Pre-Chorus)

I scream into the void

But redemption seems far

My heart is heavy with sorrow

As I face my inner war

(Chorus)

I'm sorry, for all that I've done

Regret consumes me, I can't outrun

Forgive me, for my transgressions

In the shadows of my confessions

(Bridge)

In the flames of my remorse

I'll burn away my pride

A phoenix rising from ashes

I'll cast regret aside

(Chorus)

I'm sorry, for all that I've done

Regret consumes me, I can't outrun

Forgive me, for my transgressions

In the shadows of my confessions

(Outro)

Forged in regret, I'll rise again

My sins will be my strength

I'll wear my scars with defiance

And face my demons at arm's length

[kissorkill16]

Nicky's Diary: A Hello Neighbor Fanfic

By JJ

Summary: What if Nick kept a journal while in Mr. Peterson's basement?

Day 1

This is the first full day I've spent in this psychopaths basement. I've finally dug up the secrets of the Peterson house, and in its place, I've buried myself.

The only good thing about this is that I've finally found Aaron. He didn't look too happy to see me, instead, he looked scared. I finally know the reason why he didn't want me to come back, because Mr. Peterson wanted to find a friend for Aaron.

I haven't given up hope yet, because I've hatched up a plan. Me and Aaron are getting out of here.

Day 4

So far, we've managed to escape twice, and both times, we've ended up back in the basement. But don't worry, I've hatched up another plan. You hear that, Mr. Peterson? No matter how many locks you put on that basement door, no matter what kind of traps you put around your house, we'll always find a way out.

Day 9

So me and Aaron were put in separate rooms. How stupid is that? Just because me and Aaron aren't together anymore doesn't mean we can't still make plans for escape.

Fuck you, you old bitch. We're getting out of here.

Day 16

So I tried getting out again, and this plan ended up with me getting thrown back into the basement. Hard. So hard, I almost broke my arm.

Mr. Peterson has one strong grip. But if he thinks I'm scared, he's wrong. If he thinks his strong ass arms can scare me into staying in this hellhole, he's extremely wrong.

He told me that if we tried escaping again, he'll have no choice but to knock some sense into us. That was what really sent shivers down my spine.

Day 25

My previous plan got Aaron strangled. We were trying to run away from Mr. Peterson, and he just snapped and grabbed Aaron by his neck. While the old bastard apologized, Aaron still got pissed at me.

Aaron isn't talking to me anymore. He told me he's done with me coming up with plans and always getting thrown back in the basement. He told me to give up. But I don't want to give up, I just want us to get out of here.

You know what? Fine! If he wants to sulk down here forever, that's cool with me. But I'm getting out of here.

Day 36

My whole body feels numb, and I can't feel my legs. This son of a bitch drugged me! It's really strong, and I can barely stand. This won't stop me. I'm not giving up. All I need to do is wait for the drug to wear off.

No big deal.

Day 46

Drug wore off in just 10 days, what a world. Now all I need to do is make another plan.

Day 64

He fucking drugged me again. I can barely keep my eyes open, and I fucking hate it. I so badly want out of here.

Day 81

My arm hurts so fucking bad. I landed in a bear trap. This psycho had a bear trap waiting for me! He was nice enough to clean it and wrap it, but that doesn't make it any less painful.

Day 100

All of the time spent in this basement has given me a lot of time to think. Why am I still trying? Every time I've tried escaping, I get thrown back in here. Aaron isn't talking to me, and my arm hurts like hell.

And what if no one is looking for me? After all I did to my friends and family, I guess it makes sense. No one is looking for me. I don't have anyone. All of my so-called friends abandoned me, and my parents don't believe me when I say Mr. Peterson was the reason behind Aaron and Mya's disappearance.

I'm all alone. I should just give up and die already. No wait, I can't do that. I'd stink up the place. Mr. Peterson deserves better than that. Aaron deserves better than that. Better than me.

I'll just give up. No one cares about me anyway. So I'll just give up.

Wait...

Aaron?

Did you just unlock the door?

[skytooru]

SEIJOH FIGHTERS

tooru oikawa x fem!reader

warnings. heavy depiction of violence, death, guns, kidnapping, angst, drugs, alcohol/intoxication, physical assault, blood/injuries

a/n. Excuse my grammar and all that, English is not my first language and I haven’t written anything in ages :,) kinda inspired by minghuaa’s fighter au art on Twitter!

series masterlist + chapter 2

y/n’s pov

It´s a nice summer night. I´m on my way home from a birthday party with my parents, driving through the city of Buenos Aires, watching the few passing cars and all the buildings around us through the window of the car. By this time, the city seems empty almost, as if everyone has left without leaving a single trail. It´s quiet and calm. I only hear the soft roaring of the engine and a faint voice coming from the radio in the front part of the car.

My mother has been quiet almost the entire ride back home, just like my dad in the driver´s seat. They´re probably tired, just like me. Everything seems so peaceful, until i hear a faint „bang“, just as i was closing my eyes to rest until we reach our home. I rip my eyes open and i see my dad pulling on the staring wheel in panic, my mom also wide awake, screaming at him.

„WHAT WAS THAT“

„I don´t know! A tyre ripped, Im losing control over the car!“

I couldn’t do anything but watch my father try to regain control over the damaged car. I feel paralyzed, numb and mute all at the same time. Everything seems so distant and dull as i watch the car forcing him to steer onto the pavement, my mom´s screams in my ear. I can see tears in her eyes as i listen to her begging for my dad to do something. It feels like time stands still as i hear another loud bang, and a second one following from the other side. All of this happened in the span of a few seconds, but for me it felt like hours.

I sit up straight in my seat in the back of the car as I hear glass shattering and shards flying through the air. Both of my parents turn silent, my dad´s hands dropping lifelessly into his lap. The car keeps driving and the moment it hits a lantern, I wake up. I’m drenched in sweat, screaming at the top of my lungs.

It´s been a few months since it happened. Since someone shot our car and then both of my parents. Since i lost everything i had in one night. My parents, my home, my happiness.

I let a few weeks pass, taking care of the injuries I gained from the accident. I fell into a deep hole of misery and depression. I pushed all my responsibilities such as uni, my friends and people I care about to the back of my mind and completely isolated myself. The time that has passed since the death of my parents has felt like years, even though it has only been a few months.

People have tried to reach out to me, concerned about my physical and mental health, but I stayed stubborn, not letting anyone into my bubble of sadness. Nightmares have been torturing me but then it suddenly all stopped. I managed to get a grip and get back to life. But not here. Not in this hell of a city. Not on this hell of a country.

I need a break. A restart even, so I took all the money I had, including everything I have inherited from my mom and dad and started a new life in Tokyo. My real home.

My parents and I moved from Japan to Argentina a couple of years ago, due to my father finding a new job over there. Even though I missed my friends and the rest of my family, i loved being in Buenos Aires, but i couldn’t keep living there for the life of me. The images of my parents kept following me everywhere i went. Everything seemed to be connected to them.

I fled here to escape the nightmares and the deep depression i fell into, back there. I needed to restart life, gain new hope, make more good memories to suppress the thoughts of my parents, especially the images of them lying there in the car, lifeless, drenched in blood, holes i their heads. Just thinking about it sends chills down my spine.

One thing i did not want to replace with something new was my passion for fighting, especially MMA. My dad has been teaching me to kickbox since I was a child. It’s one of the few things that connect us. We had a very strong bond and a great relationship, maybe even through our shared hobby.

He taught some teenagers besides me to fight, though, i never really had much contact to them. I only remember one boy, but i cant really recall what he looked like or what his name was.

Now here I am, lying in my new bed in my new apartment in my old new home, Tokyo.

I look at the clock that’s sitting on my nightstand.

05:00 AM

fuck, i have to get up in one hour

Fuck it. I get out of bed and head straight towards the bathroom. I wash my face with cold water and apply some moisturizer to calm down my skin from unknowingly crying in my sleep.

„I thought i was over that shit“ i mumble under my breath.

The nightmares have stopped after some time, but they’ve been coming back the past few nights, probably due to the stress im going through because of university right now.

I make my way to the kitchen aisle standing on the other side of my apartment. It’s not very big, but its not small either. When looking from the entrance door, there’s a bathroom right on the left and the bedroom on the right side, at the end of the small hallway is an open space. Towards the left there’s a kitchen with a cooking island and bar stools placed around it and to the right, separated with an open shelf, there’s the living area with a pretty big white leather sofa, a coffee table and a big tv mounted on the wall. Overall its a very open and bright apartment, everything in beige and other light colors and a lot of plants and simple decoration everywhere.

I get out of the bathroom and walk right into the kitchen area to make myself some coffee. While my drink is brewing i grab a banana and finish eating it, right as the coffee machine turns off. I walk over to my sofa and sit down , placing the mug right next to my MacBook sitting on the small coffee table. I have another hour before i need to leave for Uni.

Im studying pharmacy, currently in my 3rd year. Only 2 more years to go. Thank god.

Since i woke up so abruptly and knew I couldn’t get back to sleep, i decided to revise some stuff for a test this week. I sit there for a good half an hour, reading through the notes i made on the topics for the test. I have to pass it, to be able to continue my studies, which puts a lot of pressure on myself. Maybe the reason why my mental health is getting worse again.

Luckily i was able to continue my studies here in japan without having to do it all over again. Ain’t no fucking way I’m gonna go through this hell one more time. I would’ve rather dropped out and starting working as a cashier or sum. No offense to cashiers though of course.

Times Flies. It’s already noon and i make my way out of uni, to the gym down the street. It’s become my second home since I moved here and I made a few friends in the small amount of time I’ve spent here. The gym is specialized for mixed martial arts, owned by a group of friends called Nekoma boxers. Kuroo, the head of the whole thing, is a great guy, we got along quite well since the second I first set foot into the gym.

I enter the building and the familiar scent of sweat and deodorant hits me and i hear 50cent playing from the speakers.

„Yo y/n! Wassup?“

A male voice comes from the reception and as i look over there, i see a big guy with black hair look at me.

He really does look like a rooster

„´Sup Kuroo. How´ve you been? I haven’t seen you in ages.“, I smile as i walk over to him. I notice another guy with brown, soft looking hair standing next to him, staring at me with his chocolate brown eyes. He’s wearing a white compression shirt and white trackpants with teal accents.

„You’re exaggerating, I’ts been like a week“, he laughs.

„Yea that’s what i said. Ages“, I say as I finally reach the two of them, putting my bag down on the counter.

„Who’s that?“, I nod at the brown haired guy.

„Oh thats Oikawa, my friend. He just came back from Argentina. What a coincidence, eh? You both lived in Buenos Aires.“

I greet him as I swipe my membership card to check in.

„Tooru Oikawa, nice to meet you“, the guy says with a soft, charming voice.

I look back up at him, shaking the hand he stretched out to me.

„Hi, nice to meet you.“

I muster him, noticing his eyes glowing under the lights of the gym. His features are soft, but he looks good, very put together. His shoulders are broad and I look at the sleeves of the shirt he’s wearing wrapping themselves snugly around his big and toned biceps. Somehow he seems familiar but I can’t quite make out where I’ve seen him before.

My eyes wander over ro Kuroo, who’s looking at me with a knowing expression.

„Aight boys“, I clap my hands together, „enough chit chat. I have some training to do“, i say to break the silence.

„What you training?“, the guy who introduced himself as Oikawa asks me.

„I kickbox.“

„For real? Didn’t know pretty girls like you can fight“, he say with a cheeky smile on his face.

I roll my eyes at his flirty words and try to concentrate to prevent my face from turning red. fucking bastard.

I tell him about my passion and how my dad taught me how to fight, his face neutral, yet showing a spark of excitement.

„You sound pretty confident for a little girl like you. Mind showing me some moves?“

„Sure if you’re brave enough to fight me“.

I wont let a motherfucker like him mess around with me like that.

He grins at me and leaves Kuroo, who has been listening to the conversation, now excited for the fight, and me standing there at the reception and walks into the staff room.

„What a prick“, is the only thing i have to say to Tetsu, before heading to the dressing rooms. With him, preparing for the upcoming training with Oikawa.

all rights reserved 2023 - skytooru - do not repost or translate my work on any platform