#i just. like i don't tell them anything because i always get ridiculed and then they get upset when they feel like they dont know me
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amazinglyashy · 2 days ago
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hiii I’d like to make a request for LADS🙏
scenarios for the boys (specifically the original 3) when you meet and you’re already dating someone (maybe eventually you leave them for one of the boys). like. i can imagine raf and xav having a hard time keeping their cool about it and perhaps zayne acting the way he did in neon night since he doesn’t remember but fjdjsksm
You actually sent this a day before I got Neon Night, so I was able to reference it in real time and not look up the card on YT or anything, I'm so happy-- This was actually super fun, thank you so much for the request!! I hope you enjoy <3 (I'm gonna warn you tho, I made it a bit angsty--)
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LaDS men when you're already dating someone [for now-]
Rafayel -
Rafayel is... upset.
to say the least.
He'll act rude and obnoxious to whoever it is you're dating at the time, to an uncharacteristically high level of sass and snippy comments. You have to try and ask him what's gotten into him, but he won't answer you.
Further meetings will go just as smoothly, so your current partner will just chalk up to you having an oddly rude friend.
He'll say something that comes across as weird to you at some point- a biting comment during a completely unrelated argument about how he waited so long for you, searching high and low for any trace of you returning again, and you didn't even have the courtesy to wait for him.
He'll leave angry, but he'll stand in the hallway regretting it, because he knows. He knows you don't remember him, and he can't keep faulting you for that. But damn-
It hurts.
It hurts to know that he did everything he could to find you, to protect you- to keep you safe until he could see you again. Talk to you again. Love you again.
But here you were.
Just out of reach again.
Xavier -
You're trying to handle a toddler now, not a grown man.
He's so upset, it's borderline ridiculous.
It's like any comment or conversation starter your current partner tries to toss at Xavier, it doesn't even make it out of the hangar before it's shot down.
Any attempts you make to be friendly with him are also met with snippy remarks.
He did not travel as far as he did, do every single hard thing he had up until this point- just to lose to some average every-day person who was currently enjoying holding your hand.
His jealously is through the roof.
His pouting face is actually pretty cute, though, so there's that.
After sulking for a long time, he'll start inviting you places more frequently, under the guise of wanting to hang out more as coworkers.
His actual motives are trying to make you see just how good of a partner he could be for you.
Yes he's trying to steal you out from under your current partner's feet.
Is it working...?
Sylus -
He's not surprised.
He's also not threatened.
What, was Sylus supposed to suspect that someone with no recollection of him or your previous time knowing each other would hold out for him, until you met again?
He tries his best to be a rational man, as there would be no rationality in getting upset at you for something you have no knowledge of.
He's hurt, but he also has a mild sense of confidence coating his doubts and pain.
He knows you'll come around to him eventually- it's everything that fate had destined, he'll muse jokingly to himself.
Still, he can't help a little doubt itching in his subconscious. He doesn't have any way of outwardly handling it, though.
He isn't the type to flaunt what he has in front of other people in order to appear better. It's gaudy to him, and shows just how little someone actually is worth if they're so desperate to put themselves above another through a dollar amount.
Treats your current partner with the same level of respect he does towards you, and shows them similar levels of care.
They make you happy, and he doesn't want that ever taken from you.
No matter how badly he wants you all to himself.
Zayne -
If it bothers him, you would never be able to tell.
Always the epitome of kindness and civility no matter who he's dealing with as long as they aren't unkind to those who matter to him- namely you- the person you're dating is treated no differently.
That is, as long as they're treating you properly.
He's no overprotective psychopath, but he does have his own concerns given some of the patients he has treated in the past. As long as certain basic criteria are met, he doesn't see any issue with it.
Still he's... a bit sad.
He blames himself wholeheartedly, for going away for so long. For leaving you alone. It's his own fault for missing his chance with you, and while somewhere deep inside of him is praying on your current partner's downfall- it's a very small portion in the back of his mind. Something dark he'll never truly humor.
He wants you to be happy, above anything else. Above personal feelings, his own wishes, anything. And if your current partner is making you happy, then that's all he could ever wish for.
Even through the sting.
He's happy as long as you are.
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sickficideas · 2 days ago
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gotta hear me out || sick Akutagawa w/ caretaker Atsushi - chapter 3 of ??
ao3! 4.8/15k - please refer to the tags in the link for content + warnings! sicktember 2024, day 30: past prompt (2022, day 27: sleepless night)
Atsushi can't ignore the lump in his throat. He almost wonders if he's nauseous himself now, but he's pretty certain it's just some weird, anxious feeling that he can't push down.
Is it because he's worried about Akutagawa? Is it the lingering concerns over his lung illness, or a worry that he'll need to be hospitalized? He doesn't know. Maybe it's everything.
He manages to get Akutagawa back to bed after a half hour or so of him laying on the bathroom floor, almost half asleep. He didn't say a word, didn't complain of the taste or tell Atsushi to leave. Atsushi wonders if he's avoiding speaking to quell the nausea, although he's not sure that would work in this situation.
Atsushi finally manages to get a temperature on him, too. He doesn't make him move, he just slides the thermometer under his tongue with little to no reaction from Akutagawa, and it beeps after a few seconds. A hundred and one point one. Not as bad as he was thinking.
“Still nauseous?” Atsushi asks him as he sits down on the bed, the opposite side from where Akutagawa is laying. He's still staring at the ceiling, miraculously still awake despite how exhausted he appears to be.
“It's just - cramping, right now,” he groans quietly, shifting slightly in his discomfort, eyes screwing shut as the cramps roll through his stomach. He imagines that's because there's nothing left in there for him to throw up, and his stomach is finding other ways to retaliate, but he's hoping the medication will kick in sooner rather than later.
The thunder is getting worse.
Atsushi sees Akutagawa flinch at the sound of it again, and this time he's sure it's a result of the thunder. He's never seen him react at all to loud noises, so this seems out of character for him, but maybe it's just because he's too exhausted to fight it.
Atsushi lays down on the other side of Akutagawa’s bed, with no complaints from the latter. He doesn't want to leave him yet, not until he falls asleep, and he's sure that his nausea is better. At least he knows his fever isn't dangerously high, despite how warm his skin feels and how pink his cheeks are.
He's quiet for a while, trying to ignore the rain, the thunder. He's sure it's not nearly as loud for Akutagawa as it is for him, and Atsushi can usually tune it out, but the silence that he's faced with between the two of them forces him to face the noise.
“Are you scared of thunder?” Atsushi asks him. It slips out when he sees him shiver again. He's not really sure if that's something he should ask out loud, but he stands by it in the end. It's just an innocent question.
“Don't ridicule me,” Akutagawa mumbles quietly, not raising his voice above a whisper, even in the slightest.
“I'm not,” Atsushi tells him, “I am too.”
Akutagawa turns his head just a little to look at him, with an expression Atsushi can't quite place. It's almost like he wants to say something back. Something of understanding, something meaningful maybe, but he turns his head away too quickly for Atsushi to figure him out.
“Of course you are. You're a coward,” Akutagawa huffs out, almost under his breath.
“Always gotta find a way to put it back on me, huh?” Atsushi says to himself, very aware Akutagawa can certainly hear him. “You know you're calling yourself a coward too, then.”
He doesn't have anything to say about that. Atsushi doesn't know if he was aware of that already or not.
They're quiet again, and it's raining a little less, enough that Atsushi can hear Akutagawa’s breathing. It's never sounded good or normal to him, but now it's uneven, a sign he's still in pain. Every now and the he holds his breath, presumably to try to will away the pain from his stomach cramping, but he's not tensing up as much anymore. That's good.
“The cell they kept me in sometimes had this…gated window at the top,” Atsushi starts, sharing the memory with Akutagawa as it comes back to him. Akutagawa doesn't move his head. “I hated thunder, and…it was so clear there when it stormed. It echoed. And it rained in through the window. I had to post myself up in a corner so that I wouldn't get soaked, but…that never lasted long.”
Akutagawa doesn't say anything at first, but Atsushi can tell he's listening. He keeps his gaze forward and at the ceiling.
“That was a punishment,” Akutagawa says, realizing it without Atsushi saying it out loud.
“I think so. Looking back on it,” Atsushi says quietly.
“You're not afraid,” Akutagawa tells him. “It's just the association.”
“Yeah…yeah, maybe you're right,” Atsushi agrees with a quiet sigh. He hadn't thought about it that way before.
“Maybe we are the same, then.”
Atsushi's surprised to hear him say that.
Their conversation seems to end there. Atsushi was hoping he'd be able to get Akutagawa to open up some, but in the end, all he learned was that Akutagawa's fear is just a negative association too. He wonders from what, or where, when - Akutagawa surely wouldn't tell him, but maybe one day, one conversation, they'll get there.
Akutagawa turns over on his side after a while with a quiet, pained groan. He's been okay for the past half hour, at least. Atsushi doesn't think his nausea has gone away completely, but it's definitely not as bad right now.
“Do you think you feel okay?” Atsushi asks, sitting up from where he was in the bed as Akutagawa pulls to covers over his shoulder.
“I'll be fine,” Akutagawa insists. That's no answer to how he's feeling right now, and really, it means nothing at all - but at least his fever isn't terrible, and he's not actively in pain from his stomach. Atsushi hopes this is all a good sign. Maybe he's getting better, and he can actually feel good.
“I'll be in your living room, then,” Atsushi tells him, sliding off of the bed. Akutagawa doesn't reply or make any indication that he's heard him, but Atsushi decides he'll keep the bedroom door cracked open, just in case he gets sick again.
Atsushi lays down on the couch and stares at the ceiling.
There's a particularly loud crash of thunder then and there and he flinches so hard that he almost falls off. He groans to himself, taking a pillow and using it to cover his ears. He won't be able to sleep like this. He wonders if Akutagawa will be able to.
He feels his phone buzz in his pocket. He realizes he hasn't checked in with Dazai yet, and that's probably him now. This is typically the time of night where he gets bored and starts bothering everyone who's still awake.
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He's surprised to see that Dazai's followed up, really, but the wording of his question embarrasses him. His cheeks heat up, realizing he's stayed the night at Akutagawa’s place and not told anyone at the Agency. And of course, Dazai is the only one who knows.
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Atsushi's holding his breath, sending those texts. He's always going to be too anxious about getting in trouble, even though Dazai's never been the type to reprimand him over things.
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Atsushi sighs. Good on Dazai for taking care of that for him. Kyoka worries about him a lot, he would hate to have disappeared on her without a word. He's sure Dazai fed her some excuse for Atsushi's absence, but he's not sure Kyoka would believe it.
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Atsushi sighs to himself. Where does he even begin?
Dazai's suspicions were confirmed, Akutagawa is in fact, not well - he's very sick, actually. He tries to line up everything in his head. Fever, but not horribly high. Headache. Sensitivity to light and sound. Vomiting, of course, and unbearable nausea that makes him gag and retch regardless of how little is left in his stomach. Pretty bad stomach pain. He's coughing, too, but it's hard to say if that's worse or the same he normally deals with from his illness, but it definitely doesn't sound good. He fainted, too, and Atsushi has no idea why exactly, but there's several factors contributing to that. He hasn't eaten in three days, so it's been at least that long since he got sick.
It's probably a stomach flu. He needs IV fluids for sure. Some sort of injectable medication for his nausea would help him be able to eat something. He needs a doctor. Atsushi has reached the end of the line for what he can do here, but Akutagawa is a wanted criminal. He can't take him anywhere without him being arrested.
And he wonders if he should even care about that. Akutagawa is a criminal. He’s killed people. Just because he hasn’t since he made his promise doesn’t mean he’s absolved from that.
But for some reason, Atsushi doesn’t even consider it an option.
He's sure Dazai would know what do to, but should he involve him?
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He decides to sneak into a little coat closet right at the front door of Akutagawa’s place, so that his voice won’t wake him, and calls Dazai before waiting for a reply. He couches down in the curner of the tiny closet, not much bigger than the closet he sleeps in, the coats hanging above draping over him. He imagines Akutagawa would find this sight ridiculous.
It rings a few times, and for a moment he worries Dazai won’t pick up, but he seems to change his mind at the last second.
“Atsushiii. Bad time. I'm super busy,” Dazai tells him with a little sigh.
Atsushi considers apologizing, except, it’s three in the morning. “What would you even be busy with?”
“I'm watching American reality TV. It's very important,” Dazai insists. He’s either teasing him or lightening the mood, sure, but Atsushi is too stressed about this situation to bite.
“What should I do if it gets worse?” Atsushi asks him, deciding to ignore the comment altogether. Dazai knows the mafia better than anyone. He's sure he could point him in the right direction as far as treatment goes, or at least get someone else in the picture here. Atsushi can only do so much.
“You said he's got a stomach flu? Throwing up?” Dazai asks.
“Yeah, but…it's a lot of things. He’s in a lot of pain, I think. And he passed out earlier. And he's not just throwing up either, he can't keep anything down. He won't try any medicine. Or water,” Atsushi sighs to himself, biting the inside of his cheek, trying to keep his voice quiet, “and he's got this deep wound on his shoulder too. Definitely infected.”
Dazai just sighs, pausing before he continues their conversion. “It's never just one thing with him. And his sister isn't home?”
“No, he said she's been gone for a while working,” Atsushi says. Atsushi has only met her one time. He doesn’t have any idea of how close they are, he just knows they live together.
“The Port Mafia has an infirmary he could go to,” Dazai says, sounding exasperated this time, “and he knows that. I'd say take him, but he won't let you do that and you can't enter the building anyway. You might be better off just dropping him at an extraction point.”
Atsushi bites his lip. “I don’t…I don’t think I can do that, Dazai.”
Dazai’s quiet for a second. “I’ll see what I can do. Just give me some time to figure it out, there’s not a lot of people I can call at three in the morning.”
“Okay…yeah, that makes sense,” Atsushi says, pulling his knees into his chest, hoping that something can get figured out sooner rather than later.
“I'm gonna get back to my very important thing now,” Dazai announces. “I'll let you know if anyone bites.”
“Okay, yeah, sure,” he says, and he hears Dazai start a goodbye, but Atsushi can't get Akutagawa’s earlier words out of his head. His claims that Dazai doesn't care about him, beyond his ability.
Is that true?
“Dazai?” he starts, just before Dazai hangs up, he thinks, blurting it out without thinking it through.
“Yes?” Dazai replies curiously.
Atsushi isn't even sure how he would word the question. Even if he was, he couldn't guarantee any honesty on Dazai's part. Dazai is always so cryptic and mysterious with his wording, intentionally or not, it's doubtful Atsushi would get a straight answer out of him, even if he would tell the truth.
Why does he want to know? Is it just to dispel his own discomfort about the idea that Dazai only views Akutagawa as a tool?
Atsushi has never felt that Dazai feels that way towards himself, so it's jarring to hear that from another person, but Dazai has never given him any reason to believe the thinks any differently of Akutagawa than what he described.
He bites his lip.
“Nothing,” he says, deciding that in the end, it isn't worth it. He doesn't know a thing about their relationship, really, beyond their connection in the Port Mafia.
He doesn't want it to stay a mystery, but it's not his place to pry.
“Night night, Atsushi,” he tells him.
“Good night,” Atsushi says back, defeated, and the line goes dead.
So now, he's sitting by himself in Akutagawa’s coat closet, stuck with his own over-complicated thoughts about all of this. He’s not sure how to feel, what to think, but he realizes in the end, this is between Dazai and Akutagawa. Atsushi has barely known either of them for a few months, whereas the two of them have much more history, things Atsushi doesn’t even know the first thing about.
He isn’t sure how much time passes at first. He’s just sat in the corner of the closet, knees at his chest for a while, trying to sort through all the information in his head, before he decides it’s giving him a headache to keep thinking about it, especially with the minimal sleep he’s had.
All of the thoughts quickly dissolve when he hears sounds he doesn’t recognize coming from Akutagawa’s room.
He scrambles to get out of the closet and run towards the bedroom, because whatever it is, it’s not good. It sounds like an altercation, which he feels like is nearly impossible. He would have heard if someone got inside.
There’s stab marks in the door, Atsushi realizes, because he reaches forward to turn the doorhandle. His heart drops into his stomach, but the answer comes quickly to him when he finds himself dodging shards of fabric slicing through the door.
He’s using Rashomon, but Atsushi doesn’t have any idea why he would be doing that. Maybe he realizes that Atsushi is at the door and he’s trying to get him to stay out, but Atsushi noticed the stab marks before he got there.
Atsushi manages to open the door without getting stabbed, thankfully.
Akutagawa is barely propped up over the side of the bed, retching into the bin on the floor, choking up thin stream of vomit that his stomach seems to be forcing up regardless of whether or not there's anything left. Atsushi feels horrible. He didn't seem to be this nauseous before he forced him to eat, and now he must feel a hundred times worse than before. The medication he took only helped him long enough to fall asleep, which is better than nothing, but now he’s cearly worse.
Atsushi just crawls into his bed next to him and rubs his back, because it's all he can do other than feel guilty. He doesn’t see any sign that he’ll attack him, at least not right now. Akutagawa gags a few times over the bin, not able to bring up much more than spit, but his stomach seems to be trying so hard to make him sick that he gags anyway. A little burp he manages brings a wad of spit and bile with it.
He groans quietly through his stomach rolling through one painful cramp after another. He imagines it hurts a lot more now with his stomach being so empty.
Atsushi wonders if he's not completely conscious right now, because he hasn’t reacted to his presence at all.
“Akutagawa, are you -”
Atsushi feels the fabric of Akutagawa’s sweater wrap around his throat, and another pierce through his shoulder.
It happens too quickly for him to react properly. He screams out from the pain and all he can do is slow down how quickly he's choking him by attempting to pull back the fabric with his transformed tiger arms.
“Akutagawa, it's - let…go - !” he manages to choke out. He doesn't understand at all where this is coming from. He's well aware Akutagawa doesn't want him here, but he's literally trying to kill him right now. Atsushi can't breathe.
In a last-ditch effort, Atsushi throws himself forward, arms stretched out either the intention of throwing Akutagawa off of the bed, and it works. He loses his balance and his focus, the fabric coming loose, and Atsushi nearly chokes when he can finally breathe again.
It's a really strange use of his ability. He thinks if he wanted to knock Atsushi out, he would throw him against the wall, stab him somewhere vital, and not slowly choke him out like he was just doing. It makes him think it wasn’t intentional, or even, that it was amature.
“You can't do that,” Atsushi tells him desperately, scrambling to get off the the bed at his side, his tiger appearance still maintained. His shoulder screams from the pain of being stabbed. Atsushi’s never had a good pain tolerance, and he’s thankful to be able to heal himself with some time, but it’s still unbelievably painful.
Akuatagwa’s on his side, trying to get himself off of the ground, breathing heavy and coughing over the floor. His eyes are wild, he’s covered in sweat and he looks a thousand times worse than before.
“Are you - are you hurt?” Atsushi asks, concerned that he’s pulled a muscle of dislocated something because he’s stiff and can’t sit himself up properly, but the sound of Atsushi’s voice sets something off in him and the fabric from his sweater shoots over at Atsushi, followed by a look of terror on Akuatgawa’s face that he’s never, ever seen before. His wide, fearful eyes against his ghostly pale face are almost painful to look at.
This time, Atsushi was prepared to be attacked, and he pins Akutagawa back down to the ground, his tiger arms against both of Akuatgawa’s upper arms. Akutagawa barely tries to struggle against him, but he doesn’t need to, Rashomon simply starts to wrap itself around Atsushi’s neck again, his chest, and drilling another hole into the arm on the same side of his injured shoulder.
“Akutagawa - stop! It’s me, dammit - !” he cries out, trying desperately to ignore the pain he’s causing him through grit teeth, but he doesn’t loose the gaze he has locked with Akutagawa. He doesn’t know what’s going on with him, but something’s not right with his eyes. Atsushi doesn’t think he’s all there right now.
“Let go,” Atsushi begs, trying not to choke with how his throat is being squeezed, “please, I’m just - I just want to help you.”
“Where…” he breathes out, sounding like he doesn’t have enough air in his lungs to speak properly but still trying to sound angry “where is she?”
“What?” Atsushi starts, feeling the grip around his neck loosen up just enough for him to be able to breathe and speak, but he stays fully aware that Akutagawa can simply decapitate him at any time. “Where is who?”
“My sister,” he manages, and any sign of anger had completely melted into fear. “She’s - she’s gone.”
What is he talking about?
Atsushi hasn't seen him with a cell phone this entire time, there's no way he suddenly received information that way. And what does he mean gone? She's not dead, is she? There’s no way.
“Hey - Akutagawa, hey,” Atsushi says, his tiger paws melting away and leaving just his hands gripping Akutagawa’s shoulders and keeping him pinned against the ground. He tries to steer clear of where he knows that injury is. He's shaking. Atsushi can't tell if it's because he feels cold or he's afraid, but his skin is burning, he can feel that much easier now with just his hands.. His fever's up. “What do you mean?”
“I can't…I don't know where she is,” he tells her, his voice quiet. “It's been days.”
“You said she was out working, remember?” Atsushi tells him, but that only leaves Akutagawa looking more confused. That doesn't make sense. Akutagawa is the one who told him that she was working. He didn't seem bothered at all by the fact that he hasn't heard from her, so Atsushi assumed it was a regular thing. Why is he so worried all of a sudden?
Akutagawa's eyes are wild. Atsushi can't process everything he's seeing. He's worried, confused, scared, Atsushi's never once seen him act like this, he's almost mirroring his emotions. But he can't when Akutagawa feels this way.
He looks like a child, almost.
“You know she can fend for herself, don't you? I've seen her hold her own. She's pretty good,” Atsushi tries to convince him. He’s only ever seen Gin a handful of times, but he knows she’s a very skilled assassin. He’s not sure where all of this worry suddenly came from. He doesn’t know much abou their relationship at all, but Akutagawa doesn’t seem like the type to worry this much about anyone.
The eyes he's staring into don't look like Akutagawa's eyes. They're brighter, but full of fear, confusion.
He thinks he might be reliving an old memory through a nightmare. Atsushi's done it before. Poor Kyoka is always subjected to it, but he never imagined that Akutagawa suffers from this sort of thing, too. He always sounds so put together when he's talking about his past, like he has it all figured out.
Atsushi realizes that he doesn't really know the first thing about what Akutagawa went through.
“Come on, I’m gonna help you back to your bed,” Atsushi tells him quietly.
The blood from the open wounds drips onto the floor and Akutagawa’s arm. He watches his eyes follow the drip up to where he’s currently causing the injury, and as soon as he notices it, he releases his ability completely. Atsushi doesn’t waste any time, he shifts himself to be able to scoop Akutagawa up off of the floor without much incident, to lay him back on his bed, but he sits himself up and scoots away from Atsushi, still not entirely convinced he’s safe, it seems.
Atsushi doesn’t know what to do. Kyoka usually comes out of her episodes of this fairly quickly, but she also isn’t prone to attempting to kill Atsushi. Akutagawa is.
“I think you had a bad dream,” Atsushi says to him, sitting at the edge of the bed, only a foot or so away from Akutagawa. He isn’t very happy about that, his eyes darting around at each muscle of Atsushi’s the moves like he’s fully expecting him to launch forward and attack him. He’s holding his breath.
Atsushi scoots himself onto the bed so that he’s sitting across from him, and the movement makes the injuries of his shoulder sting, healing slower than usual because of how little sleep he’s had. He hisses through his teeth, trying to not make it too obvious, but Akutagawa catches on.
Akutagawa’s eyes are fixed on the blood staining Atsushi’s shirt, and the red is slowing down as the wound slowly starts to close.
“It’s fine,” Atsushi tells him, laying a hand over the spot on his shoulder, which definitely feels worse, “I can heal myself, remember? I’m more worried about you.”
Akutagawa drops his gaze a little, his attention turning away from him, anything other than Atsushi. Atsushi doesn’t think he can leave him alone again. He’s worried about his safety. He doesn’t know if he thinks someone’s after him or what’s going on there, but he can’t be by himself right now.
He moves closer, trying to test the waters and make sure Akutagawa trusts him enough right now to be near him. He doesn’t know if he doesn’t recognize him, but he know he wouldn’t hurt Atsushi if he’s okay enough to trust him.
He’s only inches away from him, and Akutagawa’s eyes are wide with confusion, but he doesn’t back up, and doesn’t try attacking him again. It’s a good sign, and Atsushi can’t afford to lose that progress.
“Hey,” Atsushi murmurs, without thinking, laying his forehead against Akutagawa’s and gently placing a hand on his cheek.
To his shock, Akutagawa does not immediately decapitate him.
“You're safe, okay? And, I don't know where your sister is, but I know she's safe too.”
His eyes are shining with tears, hardly able to breathe properly with how he's worked himself up, confused but comforted by Atsushi's words. Atsushi’s really worried about how hot his skin is, and he’s fairly certain his fever going up had played a huge role in what’s just happened with him.
But they’re making progress, at least.
“You think you can lay back down?” Atsushi asks. He needs him to calm down, rest, not feel so worked up.
Akutagawa just nods, letting Atsushi guide him back down. He’s curled tight in on himself, still not a hundred percent trusting but better than nothing. Atsushi rests a hand against his cheek, hoping maybe it was just the angle that made his skin feel so hot, but it really is that way. He moves it to his forehead to double check, but it doesn’t change.
Atsushi needs to get something to help his fever go down. A washcloth or something, at least for some relief. He must feel miserable like this.
So he slides himself off of the bed, but he feels something pull on his sleeve before he manages to stand up. He thinks he’s caught it on something, but when he turns his head, he realizes it’s Akutagawa.
“Don't leave,” he begs, his grip on Atsushi's sleeve so weak it hardly holds. His eyes are bright from his fever against his red cheeks, and he doesn’t look so afraid anymore, but it’s still there. That look.
Atsushi feels like his heart is being squeezed. He's never, ever seen him like this before. He almost seems like a completely different person.
“I just wanna get you something cold for your forehead,” he tells him. “You're really hot.”
“Please…come back,” he breathes out quietly, his eyes falling shut, and his grip loosening completely.
“I will. Promise, okay?” Atsushi tells him, biting the inside of his lip.
He’s fast. He takes a bowl from his kitchen and fills it with cold water, with a washcloth or two to rotate on his forehead and keep him cool. He’s faced with the dozen stab marks in the door and decides he’ll need to address that later.
Atsushi leaves the washcloths and water on the nightstand, because Akutagawa is curled onto his side and shaking, not close enough for Atsushi to reach him.
Atsushi climbs into the bed beside him, a hand on his shoulder, not sure if he’s cold or if this is something else, but he doesn’t attack him, not even attempt. He's still breathing really hard, almost panicking but not quite.
“Hey,” Atsushi tells him, worried he’s about to be faced with a similar situation, but Akutagawa doesn’t move to hurt him, his arms just tighten around the pillow in his arms.
He coughs and dry heaves a few times, unproductively. Nothing comes up but the saliva that pools in his mouth. Atsushi moves to pick up the trash bin from the floor, expecting him to vomit again, but that seems to be the last of it right now, at least as far as productively vomiting goes.
Atsushi takes one of the cooled washcloths and wrings out the majority of the water. He lays a hand on his shoulder to try to get him to lay on his back, and surprisingly, he obeys. Atsushi’s gentle, careful, laying the washcloth over his forehead.
Akuatagwa shivers at first, but a few seconds in, he relaxes enough to close his eyes.
Atsushi thinks he’s got it under control, for now. Despite his blood soaked shirt, the splatters of blood on the corners of the bed sheets and the floor, the stab marks in Akutagawa’s door - those are things he can revisit.
He watches Akutagawa closely until he falls asleep. He won’t leave him this time.
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jaythelay · 23 days ago
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Man as a kid, I took modding for granted. Now I feel like I gotta step up and continue the passion.
I remember using the trainer for GTAIV, at the time, it was The Trainer since there seldom if any were alternatives. It has literally, every conceivable option you'd want, literally think of it, it has it.
Then GTAV came out and...wow. None of these trainers are remotely feature complete. It occurred to me then that, such expected things and standards, aren't guarantees in modding. That someone took their free time to make something for free with no payment, it's incredible.
Then I see that same mentality applied to Paid Products and I'm out of patience to explain the free market a 50th time and how we're the sole and only regulators, the literal half of the free market, yet we just give companies all the power regardless.
Anyways next time you're mad about some mod that's non-inherently bad, just remember, some people pay for that quality or worse, expect it. The modder wasn't trying to garner anything but adding onto people's experiences. The dev much the same, but the publisher, the CEO, considerthat they've effectively ensured you never own a single piece of media without piracy, ever again. We Lost That War because we Believed The Rich Would Be Decent. For 2 decades.
There's a reason Not to have the same mentality with modders, with purchased products. You're no longer 2 buddies playin' games and making stuff for it. You're a consumer enabling, normalizing, and supporting an industry/company who's entire goal and state of being is to lower our standards so much they can get away with worse later.
It's rich people. Not people like you and me. The employee is closer to you than the CEO, understand that, and learn to respect yourself enough not to allow them to swindle you, it is, quite literally, their main skillset and they never shut it off, you're larping to pretend anything otherwise and are doing so thinking you're protecting either friend or ego, but the fact is, you gave them that, and are scared what they'll do with it. Stop giving them trust and power over you, you're literally able to bankrupt them by not buying from them. We've seen it, time, and time, and time, and time again, when the community strikes back, We Win.
We just don't because too many people are unwilling to raise their standards, and instead, take time to defend the undefendable. Sorry but there's no way to defend a company with a streak of SA issues. Maybe consider where your money is going and how that's impacting everyone's jobs and purchases. Comes down to self-respect and demanding better.
Whilst your entire generation became Noticeably Very Poorer, the rich have amassed an absolutely unfeasible level of insane wealth, taking half our dwindling money during Covid. Why the fuck is the only thing improving the graphics? Why are we Crawling our way towards 5% of the 6th generation's standards? Why are we celebrating that? Games went down in price since cartridges, but did not change what so ever for online distribution. We are literally, paying, for the Manufacturing of Physical Copies, for Digital Copies, we Don't Even Own, that's how bad it's gotten, they literally got a free 10-20$ by moving to online.
So again, please, Please, understand I am closer to you politically than you are to any CEO or corporate logo. You are closer to your dog than you will ever be to 100k. You do not, and will never, be in this industry as the CEO's friend or company mascot, you are not that. You are a consumer, start acting like the other half of the free market and not a Pay Piggy Useful Idiot.
They even raised the prices. Good. God. We Are Losing.
#Gaming#games#gaming industry#pay piggy useful idiots#pleas make that spread it's absolutely perfect#your average “library spreader” yes that's real#Doesn't want to be that#doesn't want to be called that#but will only recognize that's them when explained that such mentality makes them lose respect in the eyes of god#At some point I just gotta ask people. The fuck happened.#“budgets” no we've been through this a million times. They set the budgets. But primarily that's not the issue. See half the budget is alwa#Marketing. And. Well Graphics are Marketing. They are! Artistry is not and it's what people combine with graphics in an effort to make#any argument for continually making products meant for 10 years from now when everyone's on better hardware. But otherwise most players#won't get to experience. Is there a remote reason why I need 2k in hardware to play a game at a reasonable framerate and visual quality?#Why are graphics settings solely to make the game look worse and run better instead of the game just running right#I have a fucking 3090 and 12700kf both OC you're really gonna tell me that's not enough for fucking Silent Hill 2 Remake? Really?#Tell me why such an important piece of gaming history can only run on expensive hardware#Minecraft can run on anything. Just saying#like gaming isn't meant to be this unoptimized and graphical heavy#then the gameplay is always so poor in these games. The direction for the player is yellow paint like guys. These products got worse#solely to the detriment of themselves and only to benefit the graphics. Because my god#My god why do we need raytracing?????#Who's this for? Oh yeah like 5% of the human population that can afford the hardware to enjoy it. Let alone the GPU to support it#Anyways the primary point is this. Games used to be Complete and came out when Done and Confident in their product.#“Nu uh here's a bargain bin gam-” Okay? We're talking triple a and have been for decades what the hell- Oh yeah okay how about indie games#back then huh? Oh no indie games? Wow! What a fruitful talking point you have made and I responded in kind with the exact same#Regardless games have gone down in features and quality while graphics spiked and not one soul has a single argument for it#not a one argument exists for why the hell GAMING needs such ridiculous investment#it's no wonder Mobile took over. Triple A basically gave Nothing for the average consumer#Graphics don't matter and legitimately never have. Your game should run on just about anything unless there's a legitimate purpose.
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voluptuarian · 2 months ago
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At least once every 6 months I become convinced I just literally cannot write fiction anymore. Considering that's a thing that actually happened with my poetry writing and my drawing ability it's a somewhat concerning idea. Currently in one of these phases now.
#I've found writing difficult ever since I hit my 20s#not only the never finishing anything and anything I do write taking an incredibly long time to actually produce#but like#just not knowing how to write a scene#I'll have huge blanks in the stream of a series of scenes where I just don't know how to describe people like#turning around#crossing a street#sitting down#and often I'll have thought the words to describe a scene out in my head and it's fine and then I go to write them down#and half of it's gone or somehow the quality has completely degraded and there's nothing worthwhile to put down#it's ridiculous#and like I don't know what to do about it and like actual Writing advice seems to not exist#like there's style advice and how to get yourself writing#and specific stuff like 'show don't tell' don't say 'feel' etc#but like nothing for like how to actually just Write#not that I even have a way to describe my problem in searchable terms anyway#writing exercises never help because they're always little mini scenes-- i.e. exactly what my attempts to write stories#tend to turn into disconnected collections of anyway#(this only applies to fiction because god forbid I be able to write anything for Myself)#(meanwhile 5000 pages of college bullshit come out fine)#(just like what happened with my artistic ability-- draw for the assignment: fine; draw for yourself? complete shit)#there's probably some way to get help somewhere hidden behind 500 paywalls that I'll never be able to access#sometimes I think eventually I'll just be unable to put two words together any longer and then I'll die
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saturatedsinset · 1 year ago
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can't imagine what it's like to actually talk to your parents. last time I shared with my parents an honest piece of myself they laughed at me and called me stupid for it and actually they still do to this day
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yoonstudios · 2 years ago
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#another vent! don't read if you don't want to! it's long.#so um. my mom and i got in a small fight while out shopping. not anything extraordinary just a regular small dispute and she got#kind of annoyed. and whenever anyone annoys her she *always* says 'it's fine' or 'i'm fine/over it" and it has become noticeable to me#over time. so i told her 'i know you're annoyed with me' and she literally told me 'fine. do you want me to just start telling me that#i'm annoyed with you??' and i was like 'what? yes! why wouldn't i want you to??' but she didn't really answer it. we got into the car#and i said 'sorry i didn't mean to upset you earlier' and of course she was like 'oh it's fine' so i just said to her:#'what i wanted to say was that telling me how i annoyed you and told me what you thought would get us a lot further than just covering your#emotions with a constant 'i'm fine' and not telling me anything.'#and was just like: 'i love you madison but that's not how it works.'#like ????? girl yes it is how it works!! good communication strengthens trust in relationships!! how is this a foreign concept to you??#but something clicked when she said 'look your father hates it when people talk about their feelings or how actions and words#make them feel. if i get used to telling you how you made me feel then i'll start doing it to your father.'#and i just fuckin. sat there. i didn't even say anything for a good minute bc i was so astonished but everything like. made sense.#this house is so full of 'i don't care' 'fuck you/off' 'i'm fine' and so many other harsh words and careless but hostile name-calling—#we don't even know how to tell each other how we feel and think. there's no healthy connection. whenever someone gets emotional by#crying or saying something about how they feel they're called 'soft' 'snowflake' 'sensitive' or sometimes worse names i won't mention#but it's all the same shit. the shaming of being human is revolting but it also shows how dysfunctional this household is. like#it seriously checks every. single. mark. i don't even tell my mom about my problems because all i ever get back is a 'just relax' or#'stop being ridiculous' and there's no sign of comfort or trying to problem-solve anything. it's just 'get over it you'll be fine.'#it made me realize that everyone in this house doesn't know how to properly communicate or work through emotions- thoughts- and conflicts.#myself included. ever since the age of 9 i had such a hard HARD time showing and receiving affection (physical and emotional) from friends#but i didn't know why! it just felt so goddamn foreign! but now it just. now i understand where my deeply rooted#emotional unavailability came from. healthy communication of affection and conflict was never shown to me and all i ever saw from#my parents were fights. lots and lots of fights. i think i thought that's all normal relationships looked like. i thought any affection or#display of healthy communication was fake and a trap of some kind so i just never even chanced a good friendship. i started having healthy#friendships just in late 2020 when i started realizing what in the fuck was going on. i'm more mature than a reserved 9 year old girl now#of course so i'm learning how to be more emotionally available but. i just need a minute. what the fuck.
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f0ofishies · 1 month ago
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FL*SHING THEM AFTER AN ARGUEMENT
tsukishima kei, ushijima wakatoshi, oikawa tōru
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Tsukishima Kei, your beloved fiance. You loved the man to death, you swear.. it's just that he's always been like this. All of the damn time. There was one time when you argued over dinner because someone didn't want to eat Italian. Seriously? How'd you even date this guy and later on accept a ring from him.
Just kidding, he has his cute moments. The man had prioritized you a lot during his college days. He must've fallen hard for you, huh? When he did get on one knee, you thought it was a prank. Nonetheless, you said yes— already being engaged for 4 months, too!
Back on topic, he's always been a cranky mother fucker and even more when he lose that volleyball match. You looked at him— in astonishment. This man had the audacity to even be too confident in a little fun of chess?
You couldn't even believe the audacity of him. He'd been laughing at your move on your black horse.. "Gee, just get one with it, babe..!" Another ridiculing sentence from him could've sparked a fire inside you. "Hah? Seriously, why'd you even do this rematch— when you clearly don't know chess."
Your eye must've twitched at that, you love him, and you swear to that on your life. But, seriously, he's getting on your last nerve. As he quickly moved his queen, grabbing your knight in the process. You moved another piece as he smiled. "Thank god, we don't do rematches in volleyball."
Your joke immediately made his smirk turn sour. As you chuckled to your own statement, your eyes glanced up to his. He immediately gave a disgusted face at you. "What, Tsuki?—" You tease, almost pinching his face as he has moved away from your hand.
"What is your problem..?" Now that made you raise an eyebrow. "My problem—?" He can't be serious right now. And that's how he ended up giving you the silent treatment, ending the chess match when it just started. You were utterly confused... even bewildered by his actions
Knowing your fiance won't crumble to a piece of you, you just quickly called out. "Kei?" He didn't even look at you.. oh, so that's how he was going to play. "Tsuki?" No budge, huh? The man had some nerves for ignoring his future wife. "Tsukishima Kei." Last call, he finally whipped his head to you.
Rolling your shirt up— his golden brown eyes dilated at the sight of your perky, wait, wait, this was cheating. "That's right, doofus.. I know you can't ignore them." You could totally hear the clogs in his brain working. Even bouncing them a bit— He quickly pulled your shirt down. "Hey—! what was that for??"
"You're in one hell of a ride, do that shit again. I dare you, baby."
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How much aura did you gain after marrying the Ushijima Wakatoshi? You, the lovely wife, as ever.. had always been the cheeky one in the marriage. During one of his games, you'd literally chant his name out so loud. Maybe the whole stadium could hear you.
He'd be there happily, holding the ring chained around his neck. Giving you a small smile— You couldn't help but beam as you show off your ring finger too! Now that was months ago, your husband came home in a sour face after meeting his parents.
"Baby, how were your parents?" You asked him, quickly smiling as you cooked your signature curry. "Fine like usual." His deep voice caught you off guard as you felt a hand crept behind you. "Oh, so what did they—" "Can we not." You tilted your head.. "Sure.. okay." You compiled because who were you to say anything about that?
You looked at him as he ate, he felt your stare. "Yes, love?" The way your hand had been tapping on to counter.. like crazy. Lost in thought, you look up at him. "Toshi.. you know you can tell me anything?" Of course he knew that so he raised an eyebrow. "I know."
You were itching to know why he's so persistent on not telling you why.. he would usually just tell you at this point. But he seriously didn't want to talk about it, so he dismissed your concerns once again. "But babe.." You whined.. something in him just snapped.
"No, can you stop trying?" You huffed at his tone of language.. it was kind of your fault for being this nosy. So now here you were having a full blow argument. Were you petty? Definitely, a hundred percent. So when your husband had genuinely left you in the kitchen. You huffed—
Clearly, he needed a lot of space, huh? Shutting the bedroom door very tight— you wanted to go sleep there, but how? He had locked it from the inside. "Toshi..?" You called out. No answer. "Ushijima Wakatoshi!" You yelled out and finally the familiar 'click!' You finally let out a sigh and practically go in fast.
He's still on the bed, clearly trying to sleep. "Toshi..~" Your sweet velvety voice intoxicating him then sliding onto the bed— even straddling onto him. Still, the man laid bare, not even checking you out. You intentionally grind, trying to find the best friction. His hands finally with all of its glory wrapped around your hips.
"Look up." Your command might've sent a shudder on your poor husband. The blood pumping down to his familiar friend down there— oh how a vixen you were.. Seriously, he saw the way you held your shirt up. Those breasts out in the air just for him. "Mmm? Want it bad?"
"I swear, wife— you're always all talk and no action.."
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That Argentinan volleyball player was taken by you! Who knew he had the hots for you. Tōru Oikawa, he had recently left Japan for Argentina.. then he met you. Somehow, you two clicked. Clearly, you only thought he was just getting into your pants but nope!
The infamous girlfriend of the volleyball player never really visited his games. Probably because your work always consumed your time. Tōru was beyond okay with that— of course he was. But after such a long tiring game, all he wanted to do was a date night with you. Sadly, you were still out at work.. in overtime. How could you not remember it at all? When you came home, his first response was immediate silence. Seriously nothing!!
"Tōru?" You called out in the shared apartment, finally slipping off your shoes. Stretching your arms wide as no response. "...Babe?" You called out once more. Absolutely nothing— you panicked, of course. Already running around to find him.That's when you spotted your sulky boyfriend, buried deep into the bed among all the plushies you have.
"Shit, babe.. did something happen at practice?" You asked him as he finally noticed your presence. An immediate huffed was heard, thanks to him. "Babe..? Baby..!!" You whined the petname, trying to uncover the blankets.
There he was, your lovely boyfriend. Tōru glared at you, those dark brown hues of his. "What's made you so sour..?" You asked him once more, trying to coerce him out of his moodiness. "I wonder why." He interrupted you, that made you raise an eyebrow. "Babe..."
You were utterly clueless, even when he avoided your touches. It suddenly clicked to you, a promise to him on for a date. You internally groan at that, "Shit, Tōru you know I didn't mean to forget.." Your hand itching to grasp his— yet he pulled away once again. "You always forget about me.." He whined into your shared pillows. "No I don't.. baby.. I'll make it up to you!!" You try to reason with him.
That's what got him to lash out at you. You did kind of deserve it— so here you are on the bed trying to get a sulky Tōru out of your shared bedroom once more. An idea popped into your head! "Tōru.. I have something to show you.." You found the man finally walk out of the bedroom. His disheveled appearance still looked way too good for your own eyes.
Your fingers found their way to your blouse— giving him a sweet smile. Only halfway through, you were damn thankful for picking a good bra for today. "Baby, I'm really sorry.." You whispered. And finally— your breasts were in full view of his sight. Nothing could have prepared you for the feral Tōru ravishing you!
The man was full on groping your breasts, even fiddling with those buds.. was he really that turned on? You couldn't believe you've let him play with you like this. On the tips of your heels— you needed more friction down there, too. So you whined at him, how your cunt needed his fingers too! And that's what he did, dipped them into your soaked panties.
"Fffuck— that's not fair, babe.. yknow your boobs and pussy are my weakness..!"
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weird-is-life · 4 months ago
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okay okay okay but spencer dating someone who loves books just as much as him if not more and they gone over it and derek is like damn there’s two of them 😭😭😭
Hii lovely, ty for this cute request. Hope it's at least a little good🙈warning: fluff, like one swear word, pet names, (0.5k)
Spencer literally begged you to bring him lunch today. Not because he is feeling particularly hungry, but because he hasn't seen you in a couple of days, and has missed you like crazy.
And you, lovely as always, couldn't say no to him. Not that you would. You have missed him like crazy, too!
It's almost 1 in the afternoon that you finally come. You have the warm package of food in one hand and in the other something that looks much more heavier.
Spencer spots you immediately as you open the glass door to the bullpen. He goes towards you, and before you can say anything more, Spencer has you in his arms.
He gives you a quick but loving embrace and a soft kiss. It's swift, because he doesn't want to violate the pda workplace rules or anything.
"Hi, handsome," you greet him again, smiling big, "I've missed you."
"I've missed you, too, sweetheart, so ridiculously much," Spencer tells you as he ushers you towards his desk.
He notices the heavier looking bag in your hand, takes both bags instantly from your hands, and raises his brows in question at you. "Did you pack a lunch for a whole army?"
You chuckle, because by the weight of the bag you definitely could have fed a whole armada. Spencer chuckles in return, putting both of the bags on his desks.
You give a still slightly shy nod to all the team members that are currently in the bullpen. Meaning Derek, Emily and JJ.
"I just brought you a lil something," you say sheepishly, pointing at the heavy bag. Spencer eyes the bag with suspicious face while you sit in Spencer's chair, innocent smile on your face.
He opens it, and instantly gasps. "No way. No fucking way, " he beams at you. Eyes sparkling like some kid's in a sweets shop.
Spencer reaches into the bag, and pulls out not one, not two, not even three, but four chunky books. The thickest of them is a book that Spencer's been trying to get for a while now. It sold out everywhere, and by some miracle, you found it in your favourite antique book shop.
"How did you get this? Oh my god," Spencer questions happily, leaning down towards you to peck your lips again.
"It's a secret," you beam back at him. Just happy to see him happy. Spencer drops the book, and goes to hug the life out of you, deciding that the kiss wasn't enough. Squeezing you oh so tightly.
"Spencer, you're gonna break my bones," you chuckle as he finally let's you breath again.
"Sorry, sweetheart. Thank you, I love this so much. I can't wait to get home to read this," Spencer tells you, his eyes softening.
"We can have a reading night then. 'Cause I bought myself one book too........" you start to tell Spencer as you make yourself comfortable at his desk, while he unpacks his lunch.
From a few desks away, Derek murmurs to the girls, JJ and Emily, in amusement, "there's two of them now."
"Maybe we are just seeing double?" Emily jokes. Though she finds you two adorable.
"Remind me to never accept their invitation to a fun night at their place." Derek deadpans, and the girls laugh.
But you two don't seem to notice their amused attention on you. Too interested in the books sitting on Spencer's desk, and too interested in making the book reading plans for your night.
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watchmegetobsessed · 8 days ago
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UNMATCHED
A/N: it's been like 6 months since i last posted something and honestly, i haven't even written anything, things are very shitty these days but i felt the motivation to write this quickly after watching 'tell me lies' and 'rivals' these past weeks so here we go! if student-prof type of fics are not your thing then don't read it
WORD COUNT: 2.6k
WARNING: age gap, student-professor relationship
SUMMARY: Harry is very strict about staying away from students as a young and handsome professor, but there is one person he can't get out of his head and a Christmas party brings an unexpected turn.
MASTERLIST | SUPPORT ME!
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Harry hates these type of parties, mostly because he can’t imagine inviting dozens of students into his home, his private space, have the roam around and spend an entire evening with them, talking and pretending like they aren’t just trying to get a better grade at the end of the semester with their too friendly behavior. Or, in his case, some girls try to push the boundaries and flirt with him, hoping to hook up with him. 
He is not stupid. He has heard students whisper about him several times, he notices the heart eyes when he is talking in class and he has gotten several phone numbers on papers since he started his PHD studies and started teaching last year. His friends teased him about being the heartthrob of the faculty, but he didn’t think it would actually happen and to this extent. To avoid any possible scandals, not that he planned to make any, he has put on quite a rigid mask towards the students to scare them off from even trying, though that hasn’t stopped some of them from wanting to shoot their shot. 
He wouldn’t have come to this party, he would rather be home and continue his research that’s still not even close to being done, but Professor Bradford, or Stella as she requests Harry to call her, is the only person he gets along with in the faculty. She is 18 years older than Harry, but still younger than the rest of the old men who have been teaching here since probably before the declaration of independence was signed. Those men are the reason younger people don’t like classic literature anymore, with their outdated ways of teaching and unwillingness to bring something modern into their lectures they are scaring the new generations away. But not Stella. She is one of the reasons Harry went into his PHD and now he gets to work with her. He couldn’t just reject her invitation for her annual Christmas Party she holds for her students and some colleagues. 
Now he is standing by the wall, drinking mulled wine and just gritting his teeth, trying to calculate how early is too early to leave. A couple of girls have already tried to chat him up, they like to circle him, leave him almost no room to escape and then make him talk about school stuff, but then they slyly bring up personal things, hoping to break his usual character, but he sees through them always. 
Harry’s best friend, Niall always teases him that he should just give in and have fun with one of them. His morals are a lot looser than Harry’s, that’s for sure. 
Just as he is about to look for the bathroom, not to use it but to hide for a bit, another group of girls spots him and he can already feel his skin crawling as they approach him from down the hallway. He is quick to assess the situation, but he realizes he has no chance of fleeing before they reach him. 
“Profesor! So good to see you here!” 
And here we go. 
It goes the same, they are extremely nice and inquiring about his plans for the next semester and then suddenly they are talking about summer and Harry knows they are moments away from asking what he’ll be doing once the school year is over. One of the girls is talking about going to Italy on a yacht and the others chime in with their own ridiculously over the top plans while Harry is avoiding to even look at them, his eyes roam around the other guests. 
That’s when he sees her. 
Just down the hall he can peek into the kitchen and there she is, with a boy Harry assumes to be her boyfriend. He’s seen them around campus the past few weeks, he even waited for her after Harry’s class and saw them walk away together as he fought the way his stomach churned every time. 
Since the moment she walked into his class at the beginning of the semester Harry has been feeling like he is losing his mind. Whether it be the way she laughs with her friends before class or focuses with undivided attention as Harry explains something by the board, or says hello every time she passes him in the cafeteria, Harry can’t stop thinking about her for days after even though he knows such feelings should be banned from his mind when it comes to a student. Every time he catches himself thinking about her he wants to throw himself out the window, but he still can’t fight it. There’s something in her that draws him in and swallows him whole and it’s not just the looks. Unlike a lot of students who take his classes for easy credits or to drool after him, she is there to learn as much as she can and she’s had the most brilliant thoughts on certain subjects Harry has ever encountered, making him almost jealous he wasn’t the one to think about them. 
She is… unmatched. And forbidden, but impossible to ignore. She’s been his vice for months.
From where he stands it appears she is having a fight with said boyfriend, her always cheerful expression is now rather upset and confused while the boy seems to be over the conversation, almost irritated by her, dismissed. Harry tries to appear not too obvious about watching them, but he is also way too fixated on her to ignore what’s happening just down the hallway. 
He glances away just for a few seconds, but the next time he looks back he sees the boy stomping away, irritated, while she is left there, pulling on her coat before disappearing through the backdoor, swallowed by the darkness of the unlit back terrace. 
And before Harry could stop himself, he is already moving.
“Excuse me girl,” he mumbles disorientedly as he slips out of the small circle. 
He places his glass to a nearby table and then grabs his own coat from the wardrobe in the hallway before making his way outside. After her. 
The moment he steps out into the cold a short sense of realization washes over him that he definitely shouldn’t be here, that he is crossing a line, but then another voice in his head tunes it out, convincing him that he is just making sure she is okay and there’s nothing wrong with that. 
Stopping by the door his gaze rakes through the terrace, but he doesn’t see her, until she spots her slouched form sitting on the bottom of the stairs leading out to the lawn. He hears her sniffling, but she hasn’t acknowledged his presence yet, if she noticed it at all. There’s a couple of moments of hesitation on his end, he can hear the rational side of him screaming somewhere in the back of his mind, telling him to turn around and just walk back inside, yet he still finds himself moving towards him and then that voice is silenced. 
“Everything alright?” Harry asks from the top of the stairs, but he startles her so much that she jumps to her feet and backs away a few feet. That’s when he sees her tearful eyes and red nose. 
“S-Sorry, I don’t–”
“Hey, it’s all good. You didn’t do anything wrong. Just checking in.”
She squints her eyes at him and that’s when he realizes she must not even see his face since the light is coming right behind him. So he walks down the stairs and then finally his face is lit and realization settles in her eyes. 
“Oh, Professor Styles. Hi.”
“Hello Y/N. Are you okay?” he asks again, to which she just chuckles bitterly. 
He can’t miss that even with tears running down her cheeks and her eyelashes stuck together, she looks so fucking beautiful it baffles him. He has to fight the urge to reach out and touch her tear-soaked cheeks. 
“Um, yeah, everything is… perfect,” she scoffs, reaching into her pockets, probably looking for tissues, but finding none so Harry grabs one from his inner pocket, handing it over to her, her fingers brushing against his for the shortest second as she takes it and then it’s over, but his skin keeps tingling. 
“Thanks,” she mumbles before drying her face as much as she can. “I’m good. Just…” She looks at him and changes her mind. “Ah, wouldn’t want to bore you with my nonsense personal drama.”
“Drama is never boring, have you learned nothing in my class?” he jokes and it actually makes her laugh. 
“This drama is not worthy of being taught in class though.”
“I bet some of the big names thought the same thing upon writing what we read in class these days.”
“So you’re saying I should write about how my boyfriend is fed up with me because I told him something he did hurt me?”
“That sounds like something I bet a lot of people would want to read about,” he smiles and when she mirrors it, he can feel his chest expanding. Somewhere way too deep in his mind an alarm goes off, but it quickly becomes one with the void and all he can think about is her. “Actually I can think of a few great pieces that are about similar topics.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, believe it or not, you’re not the first one to experience this.”
The way she looks at him is setting him on fire. The mixture of sadness, tiredness and gratitude towards his attempt to cheer her up is still making her glow in a way Harry has never seen before on any woman. 
“Do you mind analyzing one for me right now?”
“I’d be happy to.”
The party is completely tuned out for the two of them. First they actually talk about a novel, but soon it turns into sharing their favorite books and authors, their guilty pleasure reads,  recommendations for each other and even more personal bits Harry would never share with a student, but Y/N is the exception. 
They have no idea how much time passes as they stand outside and Harry ignores how the cold starts to sting his fingertips even in his pockets, because he knows that if they go inside this bubble will pop and he is too selfish to let that happen just yet. 
When there’s a short silence Harry notices that she is probably slipping back into what happened earlier and when she looks at him again he already knows she is about to share.
“I gave him a chance and explicitly told him not to fuck me over, because I can’t deal with that again. But all he has been doing is manipulating to believe that I’m always in the wrong.”
“It’s impossible for you to always be in the wrong.”
“I know. Well, part of me knows, but then I always go back to thinking that he is right, I must have messed up something.”
“That just proves that you have self-criticism, that you don’t just think everything you do is perfect.”
She sighs and looks away, her gaze distant as she battles herself inside her head, a feeling Harry knows very well, unfortunately. It doesn’t sit right with him that she is visibly struggling because of an immature guy’s untreated problems. She deserves so much more, but how can he tell that without crossing a line?
“Give it some time and you’ll see it clearer. Use your critical thinking on his actions as well, not just yours and don’t settle for less than your worth.”
“You think I did that?” she asks, eyes jumping back to meet his gaze. “You think I settled for less than my worth?”
There’s more behind her eyes than the words she said out loud and he is torn, because he can feel himself being pulled in more than ever, like she just opened the door the slightest and he has the chance to slip in. It’s the first time he senses something on her part and after all the yearning he is eager to take the chance. 
“I think you deserve a lot more, Y/N. You’re brilliant, bright and give so much to others, you should get the same amount if not more back. If someone can’t see that, then they don’t deserve you.”
For a second he wishes he didn’t say a thing, he regrets crossing the line and he fears her reaction, but then… 
Then he forgets everything. Because she is kissing him. 
It happens fast, one moment she is staring up at him with doe eyes, the next her lips are crashing against his, her hands grabbing onto the lapels of his coat. He barely recovers from the shock when she is already pulling away.
“I-I’m so sorry, I d-didn’t mean to, I just—Oh my Go–”
Her stammering is quickly cut short when he kisses her, his hands holding her jaw to angle her face perfectly and while her kiss was closed, rushed and panicked, this one is different. He is quick to beg for her to open her lips so he can explore as much of her as humanly possible, he is letting all the passions loose that he’s been locking up these past months and when she returns it just as eagerly it just pushes him even further. 
They inch back to the wall of the house and when he pins her against it a moan slips past her swollen lips, completely maddening him. 
“Fuck, Y/N,” he breathes against her lips, kissing her jawline, savoring the sweet taste of her skin that’s supposed to be cold, but it’s actually burning. For him. 
He keeps one hand on the side of her neck, the other one digs into her hip through her coat and she keeps pushing against him, while her hands wander under his coat, they are on his waist, back and when they move to his lower stomach, brushing against his belt, something snaps inside him. 
But before he could completely lose his mind the backdoor opens and he quickly sobers up, pulling her farther away from the corner so they can’t be seen. 
“...and that was actually crazy,” a girl speaks up, oblivious to how Harry has Y/N pinned against the wall just a few feet away. They are both breathing heavily, but she has her face buried in his shoulder while he covers his mouth with a hand, adrenaline racing through his veins. 
“Ah shit, I’m out of cigarettes,” another girl says.
“Mm let’s get out of here then. I think Max said they are having a little party as well.”
“Okay.”
Then the door opens again and the voices disappear, but reality hits Harry hard in the head.
He slowly pulls back, enough to look at her face and when he sees her swollen lips and slightly smeared mascara he almost combusts. 
Because he wants nothing more than to take her, right here and then everywhere else in the world, but he also realizes what he just did and this time his rational side wins. 
“Fuck,” he gasps as he jumps back, cupping a hand over his mouth.
“I wanted it–”
“Y/N, stop!” he cuts her off. “Fuck, this was a mistake.”
“But I wanted it! You didn’t–”
“I said stop!” he barks and she shuts her mouth right away. “This shouldn’t have happened.”
And before she could protest again or worse, kiss him again, he is already storming back inside, across the house towards the front door.
“Harry! I haven’t seen you all night!” Stella catches him, but he just wants to get as far away from this house and from Y/N as possible.
“I’m sorry, I need to go. I’ll talk to you later,” is all he manages to say before he is already out the door.
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!
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runninriot · 2 months ago
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missed wiggly wednesday again, so here's a Smutty Steddie Songfic September snippet instead 😇
“I’m telling you, Stevie! That guy had no shame whatsoever. Didn’t even hesitate to pull blank in front of me to show off that ridiculous tattoo right above his dick. It was horrendous! I even offered to cover it up for free but he declined, said the ladies dig it.”
Eddie snorts and shakes his head. The things you have to put up with sometimes in his field of work never ceases to amaze him.
   “But hey, can’t say I didn’t like the overall view. A feast for my imagination. I’ll definitely use it the next time I’m ‘feeling lonely’.”
He uses his fingers to sign quotation marks and wiggles his eyebrows, delighted at the blush creeping up Steve’s cheeks when he realises what Eddie means by that.
Steve’s always been a little shy when it comes to talking about these things but they’ve been friends long enough for him to have gotten used to Eddie’s big, unfiltered mouth.
Eddie loves to rile him up, just a little, never so much that it makes him truly uneasy but enough to get a little kick out of it himself.
Steve’s cute when he blushes.
He’s damn fucking pretty, always, is the thing.
So what if Eddie stares a little too obvious? It’s not his fault Steve is so-
Nevermind.
He averts his gaze, takes a sip from his drink to cool off, giving Steve the chance to change the subject to something else.
  "Sometimes I fuck you in my head."
Eddie splutters his mouthful of beer half over himself, half over the table, can't believe he heard Steve right.
No. That must be a mistake because he can't possibly have said that.
Right?
   "I don't know why, it's just- sometimes when I touch myself, I think of you, you know?"
Eddie does, in fact, not know. Because what?
   "Steve, dude, look at me. Did you take something? Without me?"
He must've. There's no way he'd talk that much bullshit if he was sober. But they've only been here for ten minutes, fifteen max, both still on their first beer and there is no way in hell Steve is already that drunk.
So this must be something else.
Because it is absolutely impossible that his straight best friend would ever fantasize about anything other than boobies and soft lips and long lashes and, hell, maybe even a tight juicy ass – a woman’s ass – to get him going.
Steve Harrington does not think about guys when he touches himself. And most certainly not about Eddie.
He’s messing with him, that must be it. A little revenge for Eddie being insufferable.
   “Hah, that was good, Harrington. For a moment I really thought you’d lost your mind,” Eddie laughs half-heartedly in a weak attempt to cover up the slight tremble in his voice.
    For a second you got me thinking my pining ass died and went to heaven, is the thought he keeps to himself.
Another second goes by and Eddie is still waiting for Steve to laugh, to maybe swat his arm and tell him ‘Ha! Got’cha! You should see your stupid face.’ but that doesn’t happen. Instead, the air thickens and the tension between them makes Eddie nervous.
Then, finally, after what feels like an eternity, Steve opens his mouth.
But somehow, that only makes it worse.
   “Is- is that bad?”
(click here for more)
or here for the whole fic 😇
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alchemistc · 4 months ago
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"Is it okay if I call you my boyfriend?"
Tommy is - Tommy is maybe being ambushed. He's barely through the door, night five in a row of convincing himself (and then talking himself around under and through, and then re-convincing himself) that if Evan wanted a break, or time to himself, he wouldn't keep inviting Tommy over.
"Hi," Tommy says, overnight bag in his hands, the spare key Evan had given him on night three ("It's not too soon if we don't think about it too hard." "I'm just following your lead, psycho," Tommy had responded, but he'd gathered him in for a series of kisses, all the same.) still rattling amongst his own house and car keys in his hand. "How was your day, Evan? Mine was great, thank you for asking."
Evan shoots him a mildly snarky look in response, already rounding the kitchen table to grab for Tommy's bag. Tommy watches in something approaching dangerous levels of smitten as he hooks Tommy's keys next to his on one of the hooks above the sideboard, as he hefts Tommy's bag up out of Tommy's hands and behind him, four stairs up towards the loft, where one of them will inevitably trip over it when things get hot and heavy and they forget it's there. Tommy knows this, because it's happened four nights in a row already.
He should give Evan his spare. Let him nest by slowly bringing over pots and pans until he's satisfied with the tools available in Tommy's kitchen. They won't have anything to trip on in Tommy's ranch, Tommy lies to himself.
Evan hooks fingers in Tommy's belt loops, and tugs him in. This is where the real ambush happens. Evan will press his lips to Tommy's, slide his tongue to the roof of Tommy's mouth, bite down on Tommy's lip just when Tommy is thinking he might have a chance of coming out of it with his brain cells more or less intact, and then he'll pull a ridiculous move like sliding his hand into Tommy's back pocket and Tommy will lose the entire plot.
Or.
Evan tips forward and lets his lips linger over Tommy's, a beat, two, three, and then he tilts his head and rather than changing the angle of the kiss he pulls away, bright eyed gaze searching Tommy's face for - something. Tommy knows what the something is but they're moving at a pace that puts card carrying UHaul Caribiner Lesbians to shame so he's pretending he doesn't know. "Serious question, actually. I - you always use 'partner' when you're talking about your - the guys you - exes? and I don't want to make you uncomfortable but I - I kinda like boyfriend."
'Your - the guys you - exes' incorporates a fair number of pillow talk confessions Tommy's made about the overly casual relationships he's maintained in the past for months (years, sometimes) without a real label, so Tommy doesn't take offense to the way he stumbled through it. He's so utterly charmed by this man.
"Boyfriend is fine," Tommy tells him, because he doesn't really have a preference, either way. Partner is - easier. Partner had worked well for him when he was newly out and trying desperately to make it seem like he was a regular old member of the community, and not shitting his pants every time someone referenced Tommy dating a man, like it was a completely normal occurrence and not at all something he'd spent decades trying to hide. A transition phrase, really, only he'd gotten used to it and then he'd hit thirty-five, and then forty, and the first semi-serious relationship he'd had he'd used partner, and it'd stuck.
He's ready for a real kiss, now that that's decided, but Evan twirls away before Tommy can angle his head in for it. Something is sizzling in a skillet when Evan takes the lid off, and Tommy resorts to eyeing the pull of his shirt across his shoulders so he doesn't do something ridiculous like pout about not getting his mind-altering greeting kiss.
This is a pair of jeans Tommy hasn't seen before - lighter wash than Evan usually prefers, and doing absolutely amazing things for his ass as he shifts from foot to foot.
"Come taste," Evan says, darting a look over his shoulder and absolutely catching the way Tommy's eyes bounce up guiltily. They are apparently just blazing right past the 'boyfriend' thing.
It's - too early. Maybe. Tommy's never had the greatest idea for when relationship milestones are meant to happen, or in what order they should happen in. He's not about to ask Eddie, Mr. Move A Girl In And Have Her Watch My Kid While I Engage In An Emotional Affair With My Dead Wife's Doppelganger.
Which is a shame, because Eddie's one of the few friends he has that will really get into the nitty gritty of feelings conversations without a million no homo disclaimers, like Tommy isn't incredibly aware of how Not homo his friends are. Like Tommy has ever shown an inkling of attraction to ninety-nine percent of them (Sal, at his bitchiest east-coast moments, a glaring exception to a general rule).
He's too busy licking sauce off the spoon Evan's already blown on to cool for him to give it too much more thought. Screw appropriate timing.
"Mmm," he murmurs, when Evan raises a brow. "Needs more garlic."
"You always say that."
And Tommy feels a little warm, beneath his sternum, at the idea that they've done this enough times for Evan to be saying things like 'you always say that' with more than a hint of exasperation.
"Am I ever wrong?"
Evan pouts, and it's adorable in all the best ways. "No," he pouts some more.
Tommy finds himself a stool, and takes a moment to recalibrate, to resettle into his bones. He slides a finger along the edge of a leaf of the plant sitting front and center on the island, bought two weeks ago at a farmers market he'd had to drag Evan out of bed for. It's a little over watered. He's been meaning to tell Evan for three days now.
Tommy breathes, and breathes, and breathes some more. The plant - Geraldine, according to a very concentrated Evan, who'd stared at the thing until a name 'spoke to him' - stares back with the yellowed edges of her leaves.
"You don't mind partner, do you?" he asks, when he feels like he has his bearings again. He could... probably switch it up. Make an attempt, at least. The other option hovers over him like an anvil, just waiting for the Benny Hill music to cue up, for Tommy to think it a little too hard and a marriage proposal to come pouring out of his mouth in a comedy of errors that ends with them hitched in Vegas without any alcohol to blame. He doesn't need Eddie to tell him that is too much too soon.
Evan shifts his weight so that he can keep stirring while still maintaining eye contact. "No. It's - it's nice."
"A ringing endorsement. Evan, if you prefer -."
"I wanna be that. For you. Whenever - I mean I called you my boyfriend today on a call and Chim gave me shit for it the rest of the day but I started thinking about it. If - if you ever refer to me like that. Partner is... partner will be good." He's tiptoeing around the point, the whole reason he'd brought it up in the first place, no doubt.
Tommy can't remember ever having this specific conversation before. He'd so rarely needed it, had kept his work and personal life so separate that if the word slipped he never needed to worry about it getting back to the guy he was seeing at the time.
Tommy isn't reading into the preferences outlined. Partner, for Evan. Boyfriend, for Tommy.
"Am I --." Tommy pauses. He can tell based solely on Evan's reaction that he's doing a horrendous job of hiding the uncertainty in his expression. "Why boyfriend?" he finally settles on.
Evan's face flushes pink. "I...kinda didn't mean to say it? I - well it almost came out as My Tommy, and Hen would have died laughing and probably renamed you in the group chat. But. It was. I said it and it felt." He gestures, unsure himself now, which wasn't Tommy's intention. "I know we haven't talked about it. It's probably way too soon and you're just indulging me, but it felt like - like finally getting the last word in the Sunday Crossword. In pen."
He's constantly knocking it out of the park with contrived analogies that somehow make Tommy want to curl up under twenty blankets and watch Love Actually with a pint of Americone Dream. Tommy's gonna give him the extra spare that's been dangling off his keychain for a week and a half.
"Evan," he says, heart in his throat, the heavenly scent of garlic tickling his nose. "You gotta stop saying romantic shit to me or I'm gonna lock you in my spare room until I find a ring that doesn't come off."
It's not a proposal. They're - this is all - neither one of them has any chill about the other. He's shared secrets with this man he was sure he'd take to his fucking grave.
Evan smiles cheekily at him. "I always figured, with the job, y'know, I'd get a tattoo."
The hair on his arms stands on end, for a moment. Christ.
Jesus Christ.
"Sounds painful," he says, when he can't come up with a single way to bounce out of this conversation. He doesn't want to, is the problem.
He should want to, maybe. Probably.
"And, like, super permanent," Evan adds, still smiling, eyes doing that crinkly thing at the corners. "Definitely won't come off. Not without painful lasers, anyway."
"Better to just keep it, then," Tommy murmurs, voice a few registers lower than he usually speaks, doing everything in his power not to stare at the bare left hand Evan has settled on his own hip.
He blinks, and turns to stir the sauce. Clears his throat, and settles the lid back on the pan. "So. Boyfriend. It's - you don't mind- I can call you that."
Tommy watches him fidget and wonders how he'd ever managed to keep it cool for as long as he did. "For now," he says, and Evan swallows, and beams
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anakinstwinklebunny · 2 months ago
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NERD!ANAKIN HEADCANONS
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TW: at some point it contains sexual content, so if you're sensitive to that or don't feel comfortable with it, please do not read it for your own safety and comfort.
Author's note: thinking about some nerd!anakin fic where he had heard the reader talk with her friends that she's not passing physics and since he has the biggest crush on her since second grade he later suggest to help her..if she'll help him with something else ;)
Nerd!Anakin who inside was a little dirty minded boy that wished nothing more to have a loving girlfriend to do with her all the cool, nice things he always wanted to do (and he meant more joyful activities than sex)
Nerd!Anakin who has a collection of technical manuals and scientific holobooks that he reads in his spare time. His nightstand is filled with them, and he gets excited when a new one comes out. He’ll stay up late, curled up on the couch, devouring a manual on hyperdrive mechanics or some obscure sci-fi novel, eyes glued to the hologram.
He also loves telling you all about the technical details of what he's learning. You may not always understand everything he’s talking about, but his excitement is so adorable that you just let him ramble on.
Nerd!Anakin who has a soft spot for droids, and he might even give them 'upgrades' just because he thinks they deserve a treat. “You’ve been working hard, buddy. How about a new power cell?”. He’ll talk to them while he works, explaining what he’s doing like they’re his assistants (his fav is R2D2 obviously)
Nerd!Anakin who gets ridiculously excited about the latest gadgets or tech upgrades. When something new comes out, he’s like a kid in a candy store. Whether it's a new holo-terminal, a high-speed pod engine - he’s always the first in line to get it. He’ll show it off to you, explaining every little detail with enthusiasm. “Look at this! It has a new feature that triples efficiency!” He gets that adorable spark in his eye, completely geeking out over the smallest improvements.
Nerd!Anakin who would love when you'd do your nails; he'd ask soon later (when you two are alone) if you could play with his hair to only feel you scratch very gently against his scalp
Nerd!Anakin who was a great whimpering mess whenever you touched him (poor guy had never felt woman's touch before);
a sharp gasp left his mouth as you touched the mushroomy tip of his member, his hips jerking towards you without thought. he was already embarrassingly close, and now your teasing was only driving him closer to the edge “please-“ he let out a pleading moan, the words barely leaving his dry mouth
"please what ani? Use your words like good boys do"
He tried to focus enough to form a coherent sentence but it was getting so hard when all his mind could focus on, was the way you made him feel “I’m close-“ he gasped out, his hips rocking frantically against your tightening fist “I’m so close baby, i need it” he let out a sobbing whimper
"can you hold it in a little?" you asked gently
he groaned at the question before nodding almost desperately “for you, anything” his glasses sliding down his nose
You only hummed, all proud of your actions. How easily you could tear him apart by your single touch. Using her free hand to move his glasses so they were a bit more comfortable on him. You increased your movements, making sure to
he could feel the heat in his abdomen tighten as your hand moved faster. he was struggling to keep himself together, not much to your surprise "oh-oh god-“ he let out a loud gasp and a groan as your thumb moved over his tip again, that little touch sending electricity up his spine “oh-fuck…” one hand digging into the couch for some kind of grip “I can’t hold it—please please please” tears of desperation and overwhelming began to prick at the corner of his eyes
Nerd!Anakin who when was nervous, draw circles and designs on the back of your hand to relax himself
Nerd!Anakin who did your own minifigure from Legos
Nerd!Anakin who always had perfectly ironed shirts
Nerd!Anakin who in general was perfectionist in everything he'd do. If he had a mess in his room, he couldn't focus normally. If just one thing was moved inches apart, it drove him wild
Nerd!Anakin who made cupcakes with his mother for you
Nerd!Anakin who's a true mommy's boy
Nerd!Anakin who teared up after you gave him his first blowjob. He felt so overstimulated when his thick member was hugged around your warm throat, your tongue working on his shaft..it was way too much for the first time, he'd gasp and ask you to slow down because if you wouldn't, you'd already have his cum dripping down your throat
Nerd!Anakin who gave you flowers - sometimes real one and sometimes he'd do them from origamy
Nerd!Anakin who has a little sketchbook where he draws schematics for future projects—droid designs, custom technology accessories, etc. He’s always thinking of new ways to improve things, and his sketches are filled with intricate details and notes.
Sometimes, he’ll show you a design he’s particularly proud of, grinning ear to ear as he explains how it works. “What do you think? Pretty sleek, huh?”
Nerd!Anakin who was a true worshipper of your body. Would press such gentle kisses all over your body as if you were a ceramic doll he was scared to break
Nerd!Anakin who's glasses got foggy everytime he made love to you, his curls sticking to his forehead and his pinky, swollen lips quivering to hold back his own orgasm
Nerd!Anakin who adored math and physics (but not as much as he adored you). And of course, he loved to help you with those subjects
Nerd!Anakin ho invited you to weekly movie marathon. With all the snacks ready and a fluffy blanket
Nerd!Anakin who adored to cuddle with you. It was something so precious for him, and whenever he had a chance, he'd just wrap his arms around your waist from behind and nuzzle to your soft neck
Nerd!Anakin who liked to play with your hair like brushing them out of your face, twirling the strand around his finger and watch intensively, as if it was the most important/gorgeous/captivating sight he had seen, how it hugged his finger so perfectly
Nerd!Anakin who had his 'sexual education' with you;
Anakin hesitantly reached out, his hand trembling as he lifted it towards your chest. He hesitates for a moment once more, not sure if he's ready to do that. He just felt so sinful watching you naked..but oh so good.. so, before the thoughts would envelope his entire mind, he gently cupped one of your round, full breasts. He instantly marveled at, not only the softeneness but the weight, the way it filled his palm, how it was so beautiful, seeing your raspberry ripple hidden thanks to his large hand made him feel so fuzzy all inside
As he squeezed the soft globe tentatively, feeling its weight sprawl all over his senses, he couldn't help but let out a low moan, his body responding to the newfound pleasure. Guilty feelings fade away, leaving him all needy for more of you. His fingertips graze over your nipple to harden it, eliciting a soft gasp from both of you. He looked up at you, his eyes filled with wonder. "I-how i-" he stuttered shyly "-what should I do now?"
"whatever you want..you can kiss it, play with it, anything you want Annie"
Anakin's eyes widen at your words. To have the whole access to your body felt more pleasurable than anything in his life. He leaned in, pressing a soft, tentative kiss to the underside of your breast. You gazed down at how his glasses pressed against your skin, making your breath hitched. He then brought his hand up to gently squeeze and caress the soft mound at your left breast, almost nuzzling to the right one. He looked back up at you, seeking approval, as if not sure if he could go any further
"go on, they're all yours" you encouraged
Anakin smiles shyly at your encouragement, feeling emboldened. He starts to kiss and lick at your breasts, alternating between the two. He gently nibbles on your nipples, sucking on them and releasing them with soft popping sounds. "Ahh... they're so soft... and t-tasty..." he mumbled the last part more quietly, as if embarrassed that he actually thought about your breasts in that way
he accidentally uses a bit too much pressure with his teeth, causing you to hiss in pain. He immediately freezes, his eyes filled with worry. "I'm so sorry... did I hurt you?" His voice soft, laced with adorable concern.
"no--its okay..just try to use a little less teeth..and relax"
Anakin nods, his expression turning gentle again. He leans back in, this time more careful, his touch feather-light. He alternates between sucking and licking, paying close attention to the way you react to his touch. "Like this?" He asks softly, his voice muffled against your skin.
"just like that" you tugged on his curls
After the moaned sentence left your mouth, Anakin felt a surge of pride. He continues his gentle ministrations, his own body growing harder with each passing moment. He looks up at you,l with his eyes hooded. "Can I... can I kiss you lower now?"
Nerd!Anakin who was scared to eat you out at first, cause it'd be his very much first pussy. But when he did, he had no idea how to do it. He used his teeth a little too much, his tongue a bit too forceful but in time he got better
Nerd!Anakin who loves space documentaries. He'll make you sit with him on the couch to watch them, enthusiastically pointing out facts you didn’t even know he knew. He’s the type to lean over and say things like, “Did you know that this system’s star is actually binary? And it formed 4.6 billion years ago?”
Nerd!Anakin who uses cheesy, nerdy pick-up lines that leave you both laughing. He’s the kind of guy who would say, “Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re Cu-Te.” He says it with so much confidence that you can’t help but find it endearing.
When you tease him about it, he’ll get all flustered, scratching the back of his head with that sheepish grin. “I thought it was clever..and you'd like it, maybe give me a small kiss or something.."
Nerd!Anakin who is fiercely protective of his tech projects. If someone tries to mess with them or touch his tools without asking, he’ll get all defensive. “Hey, be careful with that! I’ve been working on this for weeks.”
But when it’s you? He lets you mess with his projects all you want, even if it makes him a bit nervous. He’ll give you a dorky smile and say, “Just don’t break it, okay?” But secretly, he loves sharing his passions with you.
Nerd!Anakin who, as smart as he is with machines, is absolutely terrible in the kitchen. He’ll try to make you dinner as a sweet surprise, but something always goes wrong—he burns the food, the recipe doesn’t turn out, or the kitchen ends up looking like a disaster zone.
He’ll stand there, looking embarrassed but hopeful, holding a burnt dish with a lopsided grin. “Uh, it’s a little... crispy..”
Nerd!Anakin who leaves you small, nerdy notes;
On a sticky note on your fridge
"You’re the binary star to my existence. Without you, my orbit is off. Also, I reprogrammed the toaster. You're welcome.”
In your notebook or planner
“If I could rewrite the laws of physics, I'd bend space-time just to spend an extra 5 minutes with you.”
"The only code I can’t crack? How you make my heart race this fast.
Tucked inside your favorite book
“You're like the perfect algorithm: complex, beautiful, and always leaving me wanting to solve the equation that is you.”
On your desk after a long day
“You must have a gravity field around you, because I can't seem to stay away. P.S. Check under the desk, I might've added a small modification.”
Next to your coffee in the morning
"You must be a supernova, because you light up my entire galaxy."
Left on the keyboard of your laptop
“I may be fluent in over 6 million forms of communication, but none can express how much you mean to me. Except maybe binary: 01001001 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101.”
On a scrap of paper in your bag
“If life were an RPG, you’d be the rarest item—a perfect balance of stats, charisma, and intelligence. Also, +100 beauty.”
Tucked in between your sketchpad pages (if you're into art)
“You’re the canvas, I’m the artist... together, we create the perfect masterpiece. P.S. I’m still better at drawing starships though.”
Left in your lunchbox
“Did you know you increase productivity in starship repairs by 43% just by being near me? I’d call that a superpower.”
Taped to a little DIY gadget he made for you
“This little thing is just like you—ingenious and holds everything together. Also, try pressing the blue button for a surprise.”
Next to your favorite snack
“You’re like the perfect engineering schematic: flawless in design, and I can’t stop marveling at the details.”
In your locker
"I’d cross the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs just to see your smile."
“Did you know a day on Venus is longer than a year? Just like how waiting to see you again feels like”
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TAG LIST: @kingdomhate @divineani @erosmutt @haydensprettyprincess @mistress-amidala @catnipaddictt @heartscone @haydensbbg @inneedsoffanfics @jediavengers @literally-izzy @anisluvrgirl @slutforfinnickodair @xhunnybeeex @fuckmyskywalker @gallerygourmet (I have not forgot about you now ;) )
(if you want to be removed or added then don't be shy and let me know 💋)
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daenysx · 10 months ago
Note
Gentle Sirius x virgin reader who’s never told anyone she hasn’t done it before and tells Sirius right when they’re about to do the deed and Sirius is really nice about it and helps her ease into it? (Also maybe a moment when she’s uncomfortable with the pain when he enters? I usually see fics like this written a bit unrealistically with no initial pain or discomfort and I’m like “how?!😭”)
thank you for requesting, i hope you enjoy ♡ requests are open!!
sirius black x fem!reader, nsfw
insatiable, little trouble
sirius loves the way you pull his hair.
your fingers are so gentle but also cruel, the feeling on his scalp makes his blood rush and he kisses you harder. you suck his bottom lip, his tongue brushes yours, and you pull yourself to lie back on bed.
sirius laughs at your poor attempts to catch your breath. "sorry, lovely. was it too much?"
you shake your head, smiling. "you're not really sorry."
"no, i'm not." he whispers on your cheek. "i love seeing you on my bed."
you clench your legs slightly, hearing sirius's voice so close to your ear does something to you. you press a kiss on his skin, his hair still between your fingers. he kisses your cheek and your jawline, he moves his lips on you until you get ticklish from the insistent kisses on your neck.
sirius is breathless this time. "yeah, maybe we should take a break, i'm not strong enough to continue." he laughs and stays still on you. he tries to make you smile, and you do, but it's a different smile than your usual ones.
"what?" he asks quietly. he brushes one last kiss on your cheekbone before he quirks an eyebrow at you. "tell me what you think, lovely."
your fingers are drawing circles on his neck, and you try to combine the words in your mind before you say them. it's so obvious in your actions, so clear that you want him. he'll make you say it though, you know that. sirius will always expect you to say what you want even though he understands, because he wants that comfort of words between you two.
"i was thinking- maybe we should continue, siri." you say.
"of course we can, baby." he says back. "what would you like to do?"
his voice is so gentle and sweet, you know he's not teasing. this is a first in your relationship and you feel ready enough to live this with him. he makes you feel brave, like you can get anything you want. he rubs your arm to make you focus on your thoughts, he's patient enough for both of you.
"do you want to have sex with me?" you ask, and it sounds ridiculous because he's literally hard against your leg right now.
"this is- no, i'm not kidding, the best question i've ever heard, and my answer is yes." he says, he is smiling. "but i want what you want. if you want, then yes. if you don't, then no."
"no, i just- i want you. i want to be closer, i want us to have this, but-"
"huh? what's the but, sweetheart?"
"i've never had sex before." you say, you know he will never ever tease you. "i guess i don't really know what to expect."
sirius kisses your upper lip. "it's okay not to know, we can discover what you like together."
"but i want to know what you like." you say, your eyes almost close with the contentment of sharing this with him.
"of course you can, we can just- learn it together, yeah? we've got lots of time, we don't have to rush."
"can we start now? it feels good, siri." you say, wrapping your legs around his waist.
"okay." he gets serious. "let's get rid of our clothes, and then i can get my pretty girl ready for me."
you are quick to take your shirt off, he helps you with your pants. he kisses your thighs and knees, throws his own shirt on the floor. he gets up for one moment to take his pants off, and then he's on your body, your naked skins touching each other.
sirius kisses your collarbones, your neck, and the soft curve of your breasts. you lift yourself to help him take your bra off. he seems happy to see you bare and you don't feel shy with him. he takes your nipple in his mouth and sucks it with closed eyes.
your fingers find their way back to his hair. he moves to your other nipple, kissing it first and then taking it in his hot mouth. you arch your back, he uses his other hand to squeeze your boob gently. he stands straight, fingers on your panties.
"can i take this off, lovely girl?" he asks, and you nod, lifting your hips to help him.
he kisses your belly and your panties join the other discarded clothes. his hands part your thighs, he brushes his lips on your cunt and you shiver. you squirm under his hands, and he looks at you. "oh, baby. i just gotta get you nice and wet for me, yeah?" he asks, and you nod. "can you tell me what you like?"
"maybe- maybe with your fingers- i can never reach too far myself but i like it when i'm touched a bit lower than that."
sirius nods, brings his fingers to your face to cup your cheek first. "you wanna get my fingers wet, darling? yeah? open your mouth for me."
you take two of his fingers in your mouth and suck slightly. he doesn't waste any time, but he tries anything to get you more in the mood. he presses a little on your tongue until he sees your throat clenching and then pulls his fingers back.
there's a wetness that started pooling down your cunt since his first kiss. he uses his fingers well, opens you up, and touches you softly. it's his middle finger first, just to make you get ready for the rest. he puts it inside slowly, you try to close your legs but he keeps them open with his other hand. he moves his finger a little, it's obvious on your face that you like what he's doing.
"another finger? i think we're doing a good job so far." he says, his voice slowly turns into his usual teasing.
he adds another finger and moves both of his fingers according to a pace that makes you stretch. the wetness is incredible, sirius touches the places you can never reach by yourself. you arch your back, the overwhelming hope of an orgasm makes you dizzy.
"you're doing so well for me, i knew you'd be my good girl." he says, following every reaction he can get from you.
you blush, smile with your eyes closed. your hips move involuntarily when he starts rubbing your swollen clit with his thumb. you aren't surprised how quickly he found it, it's begging for attention under his fingers.
"you like it so much, don't you, baby? soaking my fingers when i call you my good girl, pulling me inside like that." he says, the pressure on your clit increases. "you're gonna ruin me."
you moan his name loudly when he presses his fingers there, the soft spot you've only managed to find once, that makes your legs shake. "here? okay, baby." he keeps rubbing there with long fingers. "can you tell me when you're close?"
you nod, closing your eyes when it gets impossible to resist. you move your hips against his hand, he's playing with you and he's perfect at doing it. "siri, can i come? so close- if you keep doing that."
sirius listens, bites his lip as he focuses. "you can come, baby. whenever you want."
you nod again, holding onto his free hand, and waiting for the bubble to snap. you can actually feel your muscles relax, your brain closes off, every thought that keeps you awake disappears. you can see his tattooed fingers moving between your legs and that does it.
you think it maybe lasts for a few minutes to come down from your high. you know it's because how much you trust sirius and how comfortable he makes you feel that he managed to make you come. it's not only physical, it's more. you can feel he's rubbing your thigh, he's kissing your knees. he pulls his hand when he thinks you're ready.
when you open your eyes and look at him, he's already watching you. "that was- wow." you manage to say.
sirius is undeniably proud and happy. "i was thinking the same thing, my angel. would you like to do that on my cock?"
you nod, hungry for more. his dirty words can get you anywhere, you like it so much when they come out of his mouth and directed at you. he gets rid of his boxers, his cock twitches against his belly.
"can i touch you?" you ask, finally get back at the world and sitting on bed.
"sure, my love. do you want me to show you how?"
"yes, please."
"fuck, i'm afraid i'm gonna have to eat you up with how sweet you're being. give me your hand."
you smile, give him your hand, and let him bring it to his cock. he curves your fingers to wrap them around himself, he is thicker than you expected, and lovely, you think. he pushes his hips against your hand just like you were doing before and you can feel him throbbing under your fingers.
"you know, siri, i'd hate to be weird." you begin, try to tease him like he does you. "but i just wanna kiss it silly right now."
sirius throws his head back and laughs loudly. "no worries, that was my first thought when i saw your sweet cunt."
your smile never fades with him, you bring your thumb to the tip of his cock and he holds your hand. "okay, pretty, i think that's enough now."
"why?" you ask, a little sad.
"i wanna be inside your cunt when i come, and i won't last if you keep touching me like that."
"mm-hmm, okay." you say. "should i just lay back?"
"you can stay anyway you like. you can be on top if you'll feel more comfy."
"i'm not sure if my legs are strong enough."
sirius kisses the back of your hand, giving you a beautiful smile. "i can be on top of you. hold onto me and remember to talk to me all the time, yeah?"
you lay back, the pillow is soft under your head. "i'll remember."
"good girl." he says, holding your thighs and angling your body. "that's what you are, my love, you are being so good for me."
he moves on his knees and you shiver slightly when the tip of his cock touches your cunt. you are still wet from early, and stretched. "i just need you to relax." he says. "the more you're relaxed the easier we'll do it."
"i'm relaxed." you say. "promise, i'm ready."
he nods, moving a little more to get closer. he uses his fingers to lead himself inside, he pushes in slowly. you move unconsciously, you are wet but it's more than his fingers and it's unusual for you.
he pushes a little more and you make a sound. sirius is cautious, he pulls back immediately. "did i hurt you? are you okay?"
you try for a smile. "no, it's just- a little uncomfortable right now."
"do you want to continue? we can stop."
"no, i don't want to stop, please." you say. "i can take it, siri, i want you."
sirius rubs your thigh. "i think it's normal, feeling uncomfortable at first. we'll go really slow, baby."
"okay." you say. "can you kiss me?"
he leans in a little more, kissing your lips. you hold onto his shoulders and he deepens the kiss, his hand rubbing your thigh to help you relax. he tries to be inside you again, really slow and careful.
you draw little circles on his shoulders with the tip of your fingers, trying to distract yourself from sudden pain. it's not too much, but you think the feeling is still weird. sirius kisses your chin, his hips moving towards yours to let you have all of him.
"are you okay, lovely thing?" he murmurs. "you're doing perfect for me, taking all of it."
he moves himself with a different angle and your legs shake. "sirius." you whimper. "right there."
he hits the same spot again. "yeah? it should be better now, sweetheart."
you try to lift yourself against him, just to feel his cock pressing there again. "it's better." you say. "it's-oh, it's perfect, siri."
he starts moving according to a certain pace now, hitting your sweet spot. you are stretched around him, still wet and getting wetter, the weird feeling is still there but you can definitely ignore it thanks to the pleasure you get.
"gonna take care of you so well." sirius says, kissing your neck. "make you feel so good."
you are a mess under him, and you love it. "yes, yes, please." you whimper his name. "oh, sirius!"
"fuck." he says, moving a little bit faster. "gonna come for me, pretty girl? gonna make a mess for me? i can feel it- you're almost there."
you nod, taking all of him inside you. it's a good feeling, being this close to him. sirius fills your senses so well, you never want to leave him. this is gonna be a new addiction and you can't help but thinking all the new things you can try with him, the thought of giving him the same kind of pleasure he gives you now makes you arch your back.
"i'm- so close, siri." you say, breathless.
"me too, baby." he says, sucking a spot on your collarbone. "now, be a good girl and come around me."
you are shaking under him as he starts rubbing your clit. the orgasm takes you, it's intense and everything you ever wanted with sirius. he holds you, you close your eyes. he kisses your shoulder, your neck. he keeps moving slowly to help you ride out your orgasm and you pull his hair slightly as you come down from your high.
you hold onto his hair a little harder to get his face closer to yours, and you kiss the skin under his ear. "come inside me." you say. "please, i want it."
sirius obeys, and it only takes one last movement for him to lose himself. he puts his head on your chest as he comes, sucking your nipple unconciously. he whispers your name, and he's sure he almost drifts off. it's a strong urge but you keep him with you, you stroke his hair and wrap your arms around him.
after he calms down, sirius lifts himself on bed to look at you properly. you smile at him, he thinks you look gorgeous. "did you like it?" he asks, giving you a smile back.
"did i like it?" you quirk an eyebrow. "i thought it was obvious, siri."
"say it again for me, love." he can beg you.
"i loved it so much." you say, reaching his face to cup his cheek. "i want to do it again."
sirius laughs. "are you gonna be an insatiable, little trouble for me? is that it?"
"you just created a monster."
he kisses your hand. "oh, yeah. my little monster, i want you close to me all the fucking time."
he gets clingier after sex, you realize. he keeps touching you more than usual and checks on your body. "are you hurting anywhere?" he asks.
you shake your head. "no, it was unusual at first but- i really liked it. didn't hurt too much, i'll be fine."
he nods, leans in to give you a kiss.
"can we have shower?" you ask.
"nope, i'm gonna fill the tub for my baby." he replies. "we should make sure you're comfortable and not hurting, i don't wanna rush cleaning you up."
you kiss him thank you. he kisses you on your forehead after that, he knows you'll probably be sore later. still, he's gonna make sure you're fine, he loves taking care of you. you kiss him until he has to leave to fill the tub, and he carries you to the bathroom. the rest of the evening is spent with sirius spoiling you, never letting you leave the blankets on the couch and filling your stomach with hot chocolate.
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luveline · 1 year ago
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Jade I’ve been WAITING and HOPING for you to ask about spider verse and/or Miguel requests. He is the epitome of grumpy love interest falls for sunshine reader, would you maybe write something where he’s like in the midst of being scary and intimidating and then when reader walks in he is trying to maintain that image in front of whoever else is there but she just like totally ignores it and basically exposes how soft he is?
Obviously feel free to take or leave whatever parts of that you like I just love grumpy x sunshine
SPOILERS FOR SPIDER-MAN: ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE BELOW
thank you for your request! for you my love, grumpy (lovesick) miguel x sunshine spidergirl!reader, 1.5k
Miguel spends a lot of time arguing with Peter B. Parker, or as you've so fondly nicknamed him, Sweatpants-Man. Well, Miguel spends a lot of time yelling at him. It stopped for a while; Peter B. Parker took some time away from the Spider Society, but eventually he returned with a brand new spider. A baby girl. 
You linger at the door, startled to find him in company, but pleased when he isn't yelling as loudly as he could be. He looks desperately as though he wants to shout, and is holding back through sheer force of will, his eyes widened and his hair falling in unruly waves over his forehead, strands of it curled into his eyes. 
Miguel is a worrier. It isn't his fault. He's a great man with responsibilities beyond his control, and he may not always react how he should, but he tries his best. You don't agree with everything he does, but you like him. You adore him. For all of his goodness, his bravery, and the smile he gives you when you're alone. 
He's clearly troubled by something. 
"I don't really see the harm, I won't tell him a thing," Peter B. Parker says.
"Why do you refuse to listen to me? No. End of discussion." 
"I think we should reopen the discussion," Peter B. Parker says. 
He and Miguel are friends, you think. They would have been best buddies by now if Peter could abide by Miguel's rules. Then again, you ignore the rules often and indiscriminately, and Miguel likes you.
He's scraping his hair out of his eyes now, a fierce glare fixed on Peter's face, and you have the urge to go in there and try to persuade him to give Peter whatever it is he's asking for. You're almost certain you could do it. 
Not through your sheer mastery of the persuasive arts, though you have mastered them, but because Miguel O'Hara has a soft spot for you. He tries to hide it and you refuse to let him. You haven't tried to kiss him or anything (you secretly aren't that brave) but you run circles around him for fun, only letting him boss you around every now and then to keep things loose. You could be much meaner about the whole thing: what is so humiliating as falling for your lackadaisical subordinate? But you don't hold it against him, because he likely isn't finished falling yet, and because you really do like him. 
You pull your mask off of your face and then your gloves, shoving them into a concealed pocket on your thigh. 
"Miguel," you murmur, knowing he'll hear you no matter the volume, "what's wrong?" 
Miguel doesn't glance your way. 
Peter B. Parker's shoulders sag in relief at your appearance. "Thank god you're here," he says. 
You hadn't realised Peter knew who you were. "I'm here," you repeat mildly. 
"Tell Miguel that the risk involved with visiting Earth-1610 is super, duper small." 
"Well, it is negligible," you murmur, though Peter's quest isn't your prerogative. 
Miguel groans loud and unapologetically. 
You stand near Miguel and look up at him. He's ridiculously tall. You’d have to crane your neck if you stood at his feet. You maintain some distance and look him over from a gentler incline, cataloguing the dark circles under his eyes for the hundredth time. They don't look too bad today, but you wish he'd get more rest. 
He has a very fierce face, but you know how it softens when he laughs. It's hard to find his glaring intimidating when you've witnessed the white flash of sharp teeth as he smiles, the way his eyes light up and his eyebrows relax from their stern set when you bring him something to eat on late nights. It's almost always smothered as soon as it happens, but it does happen. 
"The risk involved is not super small," he says, still not looking at you, "the risk involved is actually incredibly big, and it isn't worth it." 
Peter puts his arms out just as Mayday drops from the rafters above. You huff a laugh at his coordination and Mayday starts to laugh, her knitted beanie drooping into her eyes. 
"Hi, baby," you say softly, reaching out to hold her hand. She squeezes your fingers. 
"It's worth the risk. Absolutely, it's worth the risk, and I would argue that me visiting would actually strengthen the state of the multiverse–" 
"In what scenario–" 
"–and, like, make your job easier." Peter stops Mayday from climbing up your shoulder. 
"If there's one thing you've never done, Peter, it's make my job easier. I can't believe you're asking me again," Miguel says, taking a big breath, like he's going to pop. 
You step away from Peter to catch Miguel's attention. When his eyes lock onto yours, you smile as fondly as you're able, the kind of smile you know he likes. Your eyes widen just a touch and your eyebrows rise, the corners of your mouth not quite dimpling. It's a smile that says all the same stuff you love to say aloud. Hi, handsome. What's got you so stressed today? 
"Don't be like that, Miguel," Peter says. 
You tilt your head to one side. "You don't look very well," you say. 
"I'm fine." There's a thread of gentleness there, almost indistinguishable from his serious tone. "Or I would be, if Peter would listen to me for once." 
"I'm listening, man, I just think you should see sense." 
Miguel's face flickers like he wants to correct him, but he keeps getting caught on you. Nothing specific, just that his gaze lands on your face or your shoulder or your arm before he looks at Peter, and all the steam rushes out of him. He’s trying not to smile at you.
"I see sense," Miguel insists. It's like he wants to be angrier than he has, gritting his teeth weakly. "It's not feasible right now." 
You smile at that. Right now. You're not sure he's ever said something that could lead to a compromise. You are sure that he hadn't meant to. Peter is understandably thrilled, hiding his own smile as he puts Mayday back into her carrier. 
"Alright. Well, I've gotta take her home. But I'll see you both again soon," Peter threatens, wiggling his eyebrows. "Thank you," he adds, nodding at you. 
You laugh as he leaves. Miguel is nowhere near as pleased. 
"You did that on purpose," Miguel says. 
"I did what on purpose?" 
"Coming in here." 
"Yeah, of course. I come to see you all the time on purpose. Did you think I was drifting in here on the breeze? That would be difficult, considering." You gesture to the entrance of his office, which is far from easily accessible. 
Miguel looks at you, unimpressed, with his hands on his hips. You wonder what it would take to make him put his hands on yours. 
"Don't even think about it," he says. 
"About what, handsome?" 
"You think I don't know what that look means?" He sounds fond rather than angry. It's a win. 
"I bet you know, but I'm in the dark, so if you'd… illuminate it for me, that would be greatly appreciated." 
He checks that no one's about to enter his office. You feel your heart jerk in your chest, and if his super senses are anything like the other Spider People, he can hear it. 
"You really can't come in here when I'm trying to set people straight," he says. 
"Why?" you ask. You could pout at him, but you think that might be too much. 
"You know why." Somewhere between words he drifts closer, soundless, his face inching down toward yours with a surprising swiftness. "You know why," he repeats.
You lift your chin as much as you dare, which isn't much, but enough that your giggly confirmation fans over his lips, "Yes, I do." 
He nudges you away, and it isn't without affection. His warm, big hand lingers on your shoulder, even as he says, "Go, go do something." 
"Miguel, I came to see you." 
"I know, and I have a meeting with Jess in a minute, so you can't be here. It'll undermine my authority." 
"What will?" you ask, smiling, because you already know. His fondness for you. 
"Go away. Come and see me later," he says. 
You sigh and spin away from him. "I will, but not because you told me to!" you call, leaving the office with an awful sense of victory. 
Miguel scrubs his face with his hands as you go. He's really not sure what he's going to do with you. His plan to hold you at arm’s length isn’t working anymore, and honestly? He doesn’t think he could stand it a minute longer. Thank whoever’s watching over him that you actually do as he asks for once and leave. 
Miguel was one sweet smile away from kissing you up against the wall.
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sommerbueckers · 3 months ago
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hiyaa might get real specific with this one but can u do one where paige n r get a piece of furniture from ikea for their flat and paige is complaining that its not like lego at all. it takes them so long to build it and they just keep bickering and in the end they finally finish but find a whole bag of screws or sm
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐐𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭
___________________________________________________________
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✰ 𝐰𝐜 :: 𝟏.𝟔𝐤
✰ 𝐢 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐝𝐨, 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐧𝐚 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐨𝐟𝐟
___________________________________________________________
YOU AND PAIGE HAD been shopping around for hours, neither of you seemingly able to agree on a theme for the empty room in your flat. Paige wanted to turn it into a game room; colorful furniture, sports posters littering the walls, an obnoxiously large TV accompanied by a PlayStation 5 with an obnoxious amount of controllers. You, the more reasonable and mature one, wanted to turn it into a mini library/guest bedroom for when family came to stay. Paige thought that was absolutely ridiculous.
She had nitpicked every piece of furniture you picked out; the bookshelf looked too old, the bed looked too small, the dresser 'just wasn't appealing to the eyes'. Your eyes narrowed with every 'no' she gave you, but nonetheless you let her have her way. Just like always.
Several furniture stores later, the two of you landed in the middle of a high scale Ikea. The cart you pushed in front of you was empty, save for your handbag which sat in the built in baby seat. You slowly turned your head from side to side, scrutinizing things in your head as you passed. Paige did the same, trailing closely behind you with her hands stuffed deep into her pockets.
You had slowly but surely found yourselves in the bedroom department, bed frames and nightstands surrounded you. Your eyes fell onto an ample-sized couch, the description reading 'Sofa Bed' in large, bold letters. You pushed the cart toward it to examine it closer, Paige's sighs growing faint as you left her behind. It was decently priced, and you discovered the material to be quite soft as you ran your hand over the armrest. You abandoned the cart, plopping down onto one of the cushions and getting comfortable.
"What're you doin?" Paige was leaning against a dresser, her chin resting against her arms.
"Come tell me if you think this is comfortable," you patted the space next to you, your decision-making face present.
"For what?" she asked, coming to join you without an answer. She sat down with a heavy sigh, shimmying in place.
"What do you think?"
She shrugged and made an unsatisfactory noise, "It's okay."
"Paige," you spoke sternly.
"What? You asked what I thought about it and I said it was okay, I don't like it, but clearly you do."
"What's wrong with this one then?" you ask, frustration evident in your voice.
"It's so lame. No colors, no patterns, just plain white."
"Paige, you already have your PlayStation in the living room and your entire side of the bedroom has basketball posters on it. You don't need an entire room for your stuff," you tried to reason.
"But you get to put all your books in there!" she complained.
"That's because my books hardly take up any space, and like I said before, it'd be nice for my mom to have someplace to stay when she comes to visit. Or what about your family, that way they don't have to get a hotel."
"If my family comes to visit, they're not stayin' with us. Ion want them hearing how I tear you up every night," she shook her head.
"Paige!" you slapped her arm, briefly making eye contact with a woman and her son as they passed by, no doubt having heard Paige's inappropriate comment. You gave her an awkward smile, casting your gaze downwards before looking back to your girlfriend. "Keep your voice down. Obviously we wouldn't be doing anything when they're visiting," you told her plainly.
"You expect me to keep my hands off you for that long? Yeah, fuck that, no way."
"Paige."
"What?"
"We're getting the couch."
When we reached the front of the furniture store to check out, Paige opted to put the large cardboard box containing the couch in the back of the car. It wasn't going to fit, and as the logical one of the two of you, you chose for the couch to be delivered to you for a fifty dollar fee. Paige sucked her teeth from beside you, you were always overriding her decisions. But in your defense, yours always worked out for the better.
When the clerk asked whether you wanted a team of men to assemble the couch upon delivery, you said 'yes', Paige said 'no'.
"Paige, we are not gonna put this thing together ourselves."
"Yes we are. Trust me, we got this, okay? I put shit together with my legos all the time, how hard could it be?"
"THIS SHIT IS REALLY FUCKIN' HARD," Paige groaned, her back resting against the wall as she stared tiredly at the mess you two had created, wishing that'd it just magically put itself together. Across her lap lay a sheet of directions, the paper was incredibly creased, finger sized dents on the page from having been passed back and forth between the two of you. You had been biting your lip to say 'I told you so' from the moment you had opened the box and were met with the complexity of the situation.
You were standing with an unimpressed look on your face, a piece of metal in one hand and a drill in the other. You were impatiently tapping your foot against the floor.
"Maybe if you had listened to me when I requested for them to put it together when they delivered it, we wouldn't be sitting here stuck as fuck," you sassed, pursing your lips out at her.
You were met with a glare. "Dude, okay! I'm sorry I overestimated your hard labor skills," she responded.
"I don't have hard labor skills, and neither do you! Seriously, what on Earth made you think this was a good idea?"
"Oh like you haven't overestimated yourself before," Paige rolled her eyes.
"Um, I haven't, thank you. I know my limits," you argued.
"What about the time we went to the gym and you tried to benchpress 150 without warming up?" she raised her brow.
"Okay well that was—"
"Or the time you thought you could make blueberry muffins from scratch without looking at the directions?"
"In my defense I had—"
"And let's not forget about how you bet me your favorite sweatshirt that you could beat me in Fortnite because you had been watching me long enough."
"Okay! Enough Paige, I get it," you seethed, furrowing your eyebrows at the taller girl. She was looking down at you with a victorious smirk, her arms crossing over her chest as you smoke again. "I haven't always been exactly...grounded. But still, in all the losses I've had, I've never dragged you down with me. I feel like there's a chain tied around my ankles right now and you just threw the anchor half a mile underground."
"Oh this is not that bad," she laughed.
"Paige we've been here for hours and we haven't put a single piece together!" you were laughing too.
"That's because you're goin' too slow, if you would've jus' listened to me then we would already be done!"
"Like when you told me we had to buy a mattress first and build around that?" you snorted, your hands on your hips.
"Does it not make sense?"
"Can you just hand me the directions please?" you sighed.
WITH A SATISFIED GRIN, you slapped your hands against your knees and stood, admiring the sofa bed you and Paige had finally assembled. The room was filled with the faint smell of new furniture and the evidence of your hard work—scattered instructions, a few empty screw packets, and two exhausted, but triumphant smiles.
Paige stood beside you, her own smile shining brightly. "I told you we had it," she said, giving your shoulder a proud pat.
You briefly narrowed your eyes at her, feigning indignation. "Yes, after hours of me having to go behind your mistakes and fix them, we’re finally done!"
Paige laughed, shaking her head. "Oh, come on, it wasn’t that bad!"
Just as you both started to clean up, you noticed a small bag tucked away beneath the pile of discarded packaging. Curious, you reached down and pulled it out, feeling the weight of it in your hand.
"Uh, Paige?" you said, holding up the bag for her to see.
Paige turned to you, her smile fading slightly as she recognized what you were holding. "You gotta be joking."
You nodded, your own smile slipping into a look of bewilderment. "I think we missed a step...or several."
Paige’s eyes widened as she took the bag from you, examining it with disbelief. "How did we miss this? We used everything else!"
You both stared at the bag for a moment, then turned to look at the sofa bed, which was standing proudly in the middle of the room. The realization set in, and you could feel a mix of horror and amusement bubbling up inside you.
Paige was the first to break the silence, a laugh escaping her lips. "Well… at least it hasn’t collapsed yet?"
You couldn’t help but laugh too, the absurdity of the situation too much to ignore. "Maybe it’s a miracle of engineering."
Paige shook her head, still laughing. "You think we should take it apart?"
You both glanced at the sofa bed again, then at each other. The thought of spending more hours disassembling and reassembling the whole thing was almost too much to bear.
"Nah," you finally said, tossing the bag of screws onto the floor. "Let’s just pretend this never happened. If it falls apart, we’ll deal with it then."
Paige grinned, relieved. "Okay. Besides, it looks good enough to me."
You both flopped onto the sofa bed, testing its sturdiness. It held up, at least for the moment, and that was good enough for now. You shared a glance, bursting into another fit of laughter. 
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wilcze-kudly · 1 month ago
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I am definetly in the minority here, but I was always so deeply touched by Mai's confession during that scene.
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There's just something about Mai's confession that makes me feel so unbearably sad. I think the first thing that hits me is just how... empty she seems in this situation compared to the rest of the Firesome Foursome. Zuko is angry™️ and lashing out, Ty Lee is sad and concerned and Azula is posturing. But Mai is just so devoid of even sadness around her chidlhood trauma.
It's sort of like she shut down emotionally to some extent, (even more than usual) especially after her fight with Zuko.
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This is quite a common reaction to arguments from someone who was raised to be obedient and non-confrontational, so I'm not surprised she was acting like this.
Analysing Mai's behaviour on the beach is interesting.
She seems to try to reach out to Zuko in her own, tepid little way by greeting him, but clams back up when he asks her where "her new boyfriend" was. This leads to her smacking his hand away when he tries to reach out to her by asking if she's cold. They're both trying to mend the bridge, but end up escalating the conflict further.
She remains silent for a good while, but does speak up in order to defend Ty Lee from Zuko lashing out. Despite this, when Zuko persists, Mai doesn't push the issue, perhaps due to her upbringing to be placid.
Due to this, I find it intriguing when Mai mocks Ty Lee for attention seeking, since she had attempted to defend Ty Lee from Zuko's ridicule. But perhaps its due to jealousy or frustration by Ty Lee's freely expressed sorrow and trauma that made Mai lash out in her own way.
Or it's just because the writers didn't know how to jump from Ty Lee's traumadump to Mai's lol
This is where we get into the meat and potatoes of Mai's confession.
Ty Lee bites back at Mai and parrots Zuko's opinion of Mai being "a big blah" as he said.
Ty Lee : Well, what's your excuse, Mai? You were an only child for fifteen years, but even with all that attention, your aura is this dingy, pasty, gray ... Mai : I don't believe in auras. Zuko: Yeah, you don't believe in anything. Mai : Oh, well, I'm sorry I can't be as high-strung and crazy as the rest of you. Zuko: I'm sorry, too. I wish you would be high-strung and crazy for once instead of keeping all your feelings bottled up inside. She just called your aura dingy. Are you gonna take that?
I think what's interesting here is that while Ty Lee saw Mai as recieving the attention Ty Lee had craved, Mai seemed to receive less loving, parental attention, and more scrutiny. Mai's parents also seem to be actually rather neglectful emotionally towards Mai and them just leaving Tom Tom unsupervised behind a screen in Omashu leaves me questioning if they actually cared that much.
Mai deflects, not adressing Ty Lee's question, but rather focusing on the nebulous concept of auras instead. When Zuko butts in, trying to rile her up, Mai gives a sarcastic apology. I find it very interesting that she sets hereself so aside from the others in terms of her not being "high strung and crazy", because it really shows the difference in Mai's upbringing and that of her companions. Azula and Zuko were raised to be leaders and fighters, and their "firebender instincts" were encouraged, while Ty Lee persumably had to compete for attention with her siblings. While Mai was raised with the :be seen and not heard" mentality.
Now is also a good time to mention that I think Mai has almost comically obvious signs of depression, which wouldn't be a stretch.
Zuko calling Mai out for not getting angry over Ty Lee insulting her aura leads me to my next point. Persumably, being a child raised by parents like Michi and Ukano, Mai wasn't allowed to voice her discomfort, offence or upset. Hell we see this in Omashu when Mai complains about being bored and Michi basically shuts her down and tells her to enjoy it.
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I mean look at the expression Michi gives Mai when she starts complaining about being bored, a very normal teenager thing to do.
And when Mai finally does speak her mind, it is no less heartwrenching.
Mai : What do you want from me? You want a teary confession about how hard my childhood was? Well, it wasn't. I was a rich only child who got anything I wanted... as long as I behaved and sat still, and didn't speak unless spoken to. My mother said I had to keep out of trouble. We had my dad's political career to think about.
The first thing that jumps out at us is how Mai presents her trauma. She doesn't explicitly express any pain or sadness, despite it being rather obvious to us. This is in stark contrast to the rest of the group. Ty Lee and Zuko are both very open about their negative emotions, hell, even Azula admits that Ursa's actions hurt her.
But Mai? Mai kneecaps her complaint. This can also be seen as an effect of her upbringing. No complaining, no making herself inconvenient for mom and dad.
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We also see the theme of conditional love, an implied idea that Michi and Ukano would only give Mai affection or gifts if she acted the way they wanted her to. Now conditional love from people who are meant to raise you will fuck you up.
The comics also add that Michi actively told Mai scary stories about the Kemurimage to keep her in line. Now, telling kids stories about magical beings to get them to behave isn't anything new, but it appears to be so bad that Mai had nightmares over it. Also we're in a world where spirits actually exist, evil chidnapper spirits don't seem too far out the realm of possibility.
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Also as someone who got raised by a heavily Catholic mother who made me believe I would burn in hell for an eternity if I even mildly displeased her, I do sympathise
Azula: Well, that's it, then. You have a controlling mother who had certain expectations, and if you strayed from them, you were shut down. That's why you're afraid to care about anything, and why you can't express yourself. Mai : You want me to express myself? [Stands up and yells.] Leave me alone! Zuko: I like it when you express yourself. [Approaching, attempting to put a hand on her shoulder.] Mai : Don't touch me! I'm still mad at you. Zuko: My life hasn't been that easy either, Mai. Mai: Whatever. That doesn't excuse the way you've been acting.
I love when Mai yells at Azula for frying to psychoanalyse her. Like Azula was right, but it understandably upset Mai, and it's a good thing she expressed that. It means she's growing.
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I also do adore that Mai does not let Zuko get away with acting out, particularly towards her. I like that the writer's didn't just have Mai give Zuko a free pass because he had a shitty life and she actively called him out on his actions. It's probably my favourite part of their relationship. And Mai expressing so much anger and upset is a perfect crescendo to her little scene.
I don't know why but Mai confession scene just holds so much weight and emotion for me, I can't help but feel something whenever I watch it.
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Also, side note, I find it an interesting detail that Azula's confession only came after the fire was extinguished. Perhaps it wasn't intentional but it kinda feels like its symbolising that the light "went out" for Azula (at least narrativewise) and that while Zuko, Ty Lee and Mai would be able to get out of their shitty situations and from under the Fire Nation's influence, she would not.
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