#i just. i feel like fucking tearing everything down and just going away

[sugarwarachan]

random horny thoughts about hq men - seijoh + nekoma edition

CHARACTERS: mattsun, iwaizumi, makki, oikawa, kuroo, kenma, shohei CWS: nsfw, smut, all characters 18+, knife play, implied d/s undertones to a lot of these, toxic relationship elements, cheating/cucking if you squint, corruption kink, oral (f!receiving), bondage, spit kink NOTES: continue to enjoy my gross thoughts as i pull myself out of whatever writer's block hell i'm in. thank you to the anon who suggested shohei's - i accidentally deleted it i'm so sorry 😀

mattsun loves knife play. the idea of cutting your tights away from your body, tracing the knife ever so gently up the inside of your thigh before rippppp the metal tears through like butter. the flash of fear and unbridled lust in your eyes bricks him up instantly. he slots his thigh between yours and presses the flat of the blade ever so gently against your thrumming pulse. "ready to play, angel?"

iwaizumi finds out your ex never made you cum and makes it his personal mission to give you as many orgasms as possible. his fingers, tongue, dick, thighs, he wants to get you off in every way possible and erase that idiot’s ineptitude from your brain. “you cum so easily, baby. the fuck was your ex talking about?”

makki loves when you talk back. it’s foreplay for him to take you out somewhere nice and relentlessly tease you all night, each of you trading good-natured barbs that run just a little bit nasty (he likes when you’re mean, what can he say). there’s always a line, though, and when you cross it, his hand grips the back of your neck hard enough to stop you short. "I think we should go home, don't you?"

oikawa is prone to toxic situationships that always result in hurt feelings (his own). he sees you out with other guys and it actually boils his blood to the point where he’s calling you, whining about how you don’t make time for him anymore, and when you come over, he fucks you face down on the mattress to remind you that he’s the only one who knows how to make you cum the way you like

he’s super embarassed about it, but kuroo has a little bit of a corruption kink. like the first time he goes down on you and you get all blushy and embarassed - he’s hard as a rock. soothes you with soft kisses on your neck and stomach as he tells you how beautiful you look, how good you are just for him. he’s gentle in how he eats but he’s determined to make you as crazy for him as he is for you

kenma is lazy this kenma is lazy that - kenma finds out how much you like to be tied up and learns everything he can about bondage play. he buys a dummy to practice on (kuroo absolutely loses his mind over this), he watches tutorials, boy is dedicated to finding out how to make you cum this way. when this skinny streamer guy asks you out, you have no idea you’re gonna be roped into a bondage belt with a happy strap grazing over your clit as you sob into his arms (but you're not complaining)

your first impression of shohei is that he’s never known the touch of a woman but HOO BOY were you wrong. this man is a FREAK between the sheets. you can’t believe that the mild-mannered dude who barely says a word forces your mouth open so he can spit directly onto your tongue. by the time he’s done with you, you’re fucked out of your skull, covered in scratches, hickies, and cum, and being asked if you want to order taco bell

2025 © all works belong to @sugarwarachan. do not repost, translate, or steal any of my works. reblogs and comments always appreciated <3

[cyberyam]

sukuna smut? pleaseeEeeEE?

ꨄ summary: sukuna is hungry [for pussy]!!! [MDNI 18+!!]

You were fucking delicious.

After an eternity of denial from worldly pleasure, he ached. Aching for pleasure he had long been deprived of, he practically begged to have a taste of you, begged to be between your legs every chance he got, no matter the scenario.

“C’mon, baby,” he murmured in your ear, his voice thick with need as you stood at the sink, rinsing vegetables for dinner. His hands were already on you, slipping beneath the hem of your shirt, fingertips grazing the soft warmth of your stomach.

“You know I’d rather eat somethin’ else.” His teeth grazed your earlobe, his breath heavy and slow, like he was savoring your scent, drinking in the heat of your skin. His fingers traced along your waist, gripping with just enough pressure to remind you how badly he wanted you.

“Yeah, well, I need to eat—y’know—food,” you countered, trying to keep your focus on the potatoes beneath your hands. But he was relentless.

“I got somethin’ for ya,” he rasped, pressing his hips into you, letting you feel just how hard he was—hot and thick against your ass, his need pulsing through the layers between you.

His mouth found your neck, trailing open-mouthed kisses, tongue flicking against the sensitive spot just below your ear. “C’mon, just a taste,” he whispered, voice rough with desire. His fingers traced slow, teasing circles down your hips, knowing exactly how to break you.

The heat of his breath, the way his body molded against yours, the desperate edge in his voice—it always made you weak. He knew.

Before you could protest, he had you on the kitchen counter, knocking everything aside in his desperation. You would scold him about how carelessly he threw everything aside, and he would just grumble something about cleaning it later. His grip was rough, hands spreading you open like he couldn’t stand another second without you. You gasped at the sudden movement, but he only groaned, pressing his forehead to your thigh, his breath searing against your skin.

“You have no idea how badly I need this,” he muttered, voice hoarse. His hands slid up your thighs, thumbs pressing into your flesh, kneading, worshipping. He was shaking with restraint, his hunger insatiable, his mouth parting just above where you ached for him. His teeth found your underwear, pulling them to the side to expose your glistening hole that puckered, responding to his hot breath.

And then, finally, his tongue found you.

He groaned at the first taste, the vibration of it sending sparks up your spine. His arms hooked under your thighs, holding you still, his grip almost bruising as he lapped between your folds, deep and deliberate, savoring you.

“Fuck, ‘kuna” you gasped, your back arching, your fingers tangling in his hair ah his pace quickened, tugging, urging him closer, and this only fed his hunger.

He’d stand, folding you into yourself and forcing your feet over your head as your knees tucked into your chest, only so he could deepen his reach, his hands trailing down calves, gripping them tight so you couldn’t move.

“‘kuna!” you groaned at the way his tongue fucked you, deep and sloppily, and when he’d pull away, the way his teeth grazed at your clit sent a shock through your body as he mumbled—

“You like that, baby?”

And when you came, he took it all—lapping, drinking and slurping you in like he’d never get enough, holding you down as you trembled, refusing to let you go, no matter how much you writhed beneath him.

And then he’d fuck you once you came, eyes fixed on the way his cock vanished into you, mesmerized by how greedily you took him, how wet you were for him, the slick, filthy sounds only spurring him on as he pounded into you.

“Fuck, baby, you take me so well,” he’d coo, his eyes darting between your pussy and the fat tears that streamed down your face as you bit your wrist.

And he’d want to return the favour to your pussy—pulling out, dragging you to the edge of the counter, his grip firm as he lifted your hips—and you knew it would leave a bruise. Your ass high, your thighs shaking as his mouth met your sopping heat, his mind filled with nothing but the desire to devour you until you came for him again. And then—only then—when you were sobbing and shivering beneath him, would he fuck you again, giving into your pleads to be filled. Pushing you into the cold kitchen counter as he stretched you open, filling you until you were nothing but a drooling mess under his touch.

an. inspo taken from irl events, a guy asked if he could “have a taste” and it made me cringe, so now i share that cringe with you all. (i’m sorry anon)

© cyberyam

[sergeantbarnessdoll]

Payment » Bucky Barnes (AU)

Pairings: Mechanic!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: You pay Bucky in a different way for fixing your car.

Warnings: Smut (18+), language, dirty talk, kissing, hickeys, blowjob, little bit of fingering, unprotected sex, office sex, praise kink, pet names

A/N: There’s an auto shop like 2 minutes away from where I live called Barnes Auto Barn. Also, Bucky has tattoos on his left arm in this. Enjoy!

Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.

Header made by @buck-star

GIF IS NOT MINE! Gif credit goes to the creator.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!🔞

“Thank you so much for fixing my car.” You smiled.

“You don’t have to thank me. I enjoy fixing your car.” Bucky smiles back.

You got your wallet out of your purse to pay Bucky for fixing your car. You groaned to yourself when you realized that you forgot to go to the bank before going to pick up your car.

“I completely forgot to go to the bank before coming here.” You say. “Is there any way I can pay you tomorrow?” You asked.

“Don’t worry about it. You’ve been bringing your car here for a few years. It’s on the house.” Bucky says.

“Are you sure?” You asked.

“It’s fine.” He smiles.

“I’d feel much better if I paid you. I’ll do anything.” You say.

“Anything, huh?” He muses.

You nodded. Bucky bit his bottom lip when something came to his mind. He walked closer to you, closing the distance between the two of you. He caressed your cheek and rubbed his thumb against your bottom lip.

“I suppose there’s a different way you can pay me for fixing your car.” He almost whispers. “Let me lock up first.” He says.

You bit your bottom lip as he walked out of the garage to lock up everything. When Bucky came back, he grabbed your hand and led you to his office. He closed and locked the door behind him. He then kissed you hungrily. You moaned against his lips. You tugged on the white tank top he’s wearing, want it off. Bucky pulled away to take it off.

“Get on your knees.” Bucky orders.

You submitted to him and sunk down to your knees. You looked up at him innocently and bit your bottom lip. You then unbuckled his belt and undid the button and zipper on his jeans. Bucky helped you by pulling his jeans down to the middle of his thighs. You licked your lips at the sight of his hard cock. You wrapped your hand around his cock, stroking it a few times before kitten licking his tip. You moaned at the taste of his precum. You wrapped your lips around his tip and slowly began bobbing your head, taking as much as his cock as you could. Whatever you couldn’t fit in your mouth, you stroked in your hand.

“Fuck…” Bucky moans. “I always knew you had an amazing mouth.” He says.

Bucky put his hand on the back of your head, gently guiding your head on his cock as you sucked it. You took a few deep breaths through your nose before attempting to take his whole cock in your mouth. You gagged a bit when his cock hit the back of your throat, making your eyes water. You tried your best to relax your throat. You brought your hands up to his thighs, holding onto them to steady yourself.

“Shit, baby.” He moans. “That’s a good girl. Just like that.” He praises.

Bucky bit his bottom lip as he watched you suck his cock. The sight below him is so sinful and hot.

“I might have you pay like this from now on.” He says.

You moaned around his cock in response.

“Oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you, baby? You wanna pay me by having my fat cock down your throat?” He asks.

You moaned again. Bucky couldn’t hold back anymore. He thrusted his hips, making his cock thrust into your throat. You gagged at the sudden and new sensation, but you’re not complaining.

“Relax your throat for me, pretty girl.” He says softly. “There you go.” He coos.

Bucky’s hands gathered your hair and held it as he fucked your mouth. Your eyes watered even more. Tears started to roll down your face, but you didn’t mind it one bit. Saliva began to pool in your mouth and a little bit of it rolled down your chin.

“God damn, baby…” Bucky moans. “You’re gonna make me cum sooner than I like to. That’s what you’re trying to do, isn’t it, baby girl?” He pants.

You moaned around his cock and tried your best to nod your head. Bucky was right too. He’s going to cum sooner than he would like. He stopped thrusting his hips and pushed you all the way down on his cock, your nose touching just above the base of his cock. His eyes fluttered shut and tilted his head back, moaning your name as he came in your mouth. Bucky slowly pulled his cock out of your mouth and took a step back so you could stand up. You swallowed his cum and opened your mouth, sticking out your tongue to show him. He put his hand on the back of your head and brought you in for a hungry kiss.

Good thing Bucky cleaned his desk earlier before you came in today. He turned you around and started kissing along your neck, his teeth nipping on your skin to mark you up. His hands pulled down your pants and panties, letting them pool at your feet. One of his hands found its way in between your legs and started rubbing your clit, spreading your slick around. You moaned softly. He then slid two fingers inside of you, making you gasp.

“Oh fuck, Bucky!” You moaned, dropping your head against his shoulder.

His fingers thrusted in and out of your pussy, getting you ready for his cock. Bucky’s free hand went underneath your shirt, cupping one of your breasts over your bra.

“Bucky, please…” You begged. “Please fuck me.” You begged desperately.

“Such a needy girl for my cock.” Bucky says, lightly chuckling.

Bucky took his fingers out of your pussy, making you whine. He bent you over his desk before he lined his cock at your entrance, slowly sliding it inside of you. Your mouth fell open, moaning softly.

“Oh my god…” You moaned softly.

Bucky gave you a moment to adjust to his size before he started thrusting. His hands slid up and down your sides as he fucked you. He then grasped the bottom of your shirt and pulled it over your head, dropping it on the floor next to the desk. One of his hands expertly unclasped your bra, letting it fall from your chest.

Bucky wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you upright so your back was against the front of his body. His hands found their way to your breasts, cupping them. His thumbs rubbed over your nipples before giving them a pinch. You gasped and arched your back, pressing your breasts more into his hands.

“Please don’t stop!” You moaned.

“I fucking won’t, baby.” Bucky practically growls.

The sound of your moans was music to his ears. Bucky sped up his thrusts. The sound of skin slapping filled the office. Good thing you two are the only ones there.

“You’re being such a good girl for me, aren’t you, princess?” He whispers in your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.

“Mhmm yes!” You moaned, leaning your head back against his shoulder.

You tilted your head to the side just enough for Bucky to kiss along your neck. Your eyes fluttered shut. You were enjoying the feeling of his stubble scratching your skin.

One of Bucky’s hands slid down the front of your body. His fingers found your clit with ease and started rubbing it.

“Oh god! Yes, Bucky!” You moaned.

You put one of your hands on his tattooed arm, digging your nails in his inked up skin on his left arm. Your head leaned back against his shoulder. You could feel your orgasm building up.

“Oh fuck! I’m gonna cum!” You moaned.

“Me too, baby.” Bucky pants. “Cum for me, pretty girl.” He says softly.

His fingers sped up the rubbing on your clit. Your toes curled in your shoes when your orgasm came crashing down on you. You scratched his tattooed arm as you came on his cock. Bucky fucked you through your orgasm. His fingers gave your clit one last rub before focusing on his own orgasm. His hands held onto your hips tightly as his orgasm was about to make him fall over the edge. A grunt left his lips as he came inside of you. His thrusts came to a stop after a few more thrusts.

After a couple minutes, Bucky pulled out of you and got dressed. He then grabbed you by your hips and kissed you one more time. You moaned against his lips.

“Maybe I should pay you like this every time you fix my car.” You say with a grin.

“Maybe you should.” Bucky grins back.

You two exited his office and walked out of the building to the parking lot. Bucky, being the gentleman he is, walked you to your car.

“I believe these belong to you.” He says, holding your car keys.

You giggled softly and took your keys out of his hand. You unlocked your car and opened the door.

“Do you want to go out for drinks sometime?” He asks.

“I would love that.” You answered with a smile.

Bucky smiles back and kisses you once again.

“Stay safe, baby. Let me know if you have anymore car problems.” He says.

“I will.” You smiled.

🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

-Bucky’s Doll

[nottslove]

BLOODY KNUCKLES

Pairing: mattheo riddle x slytherin fem!reader

Warnings: 18+, smut under the cut, mdni, a little angst, established relationship, slight choking, dubcon if you squint, heavy cursing, mentions of blood, bloody knuckles, violence, degrading, praising, porn with minimal plot, fingering, slight edging, semi-public, lowercaps intended.

Summary: a guy flirted with you, and you gave him your number, only for your boyfriend mattheo to beat him up until he was barely breathing and teach you a lesson— that you belong to him, and only him.

Author's note: had this idea, and decided to write. special thanks to @ur-local-wizard for being an absolute cinnamon roll and giving me motivation. you guys should go follow them. enjoy!!.

HE was fucking pissed. You could tell just by the way he sat there before the fireplace, in the empty Slytherin common room hours past curfew, with his jaw tight and his fists clenched, staring venomously into the flames with the utmost displeasure.

You were cautious as you approached him, getting down on your knees and kneeling beside him on the floor, whilst he sat in the armchair, back hunched, his dark eyes wide and unblinking as they caught a reflection of the flames in the black windows to his soul.

You held a washcloth and a bowl of warm water in your hands, and your fingers slowly grasped his bruised knuckles and completely bloody hands, before you slowly began to wipe away the blood on his hands.

However, the moment your hand made contact with his, his dark, soulless eyes bore into yours, giving you a sharp, venomous glare.

"Don't," he growled, tugging his hand away, shrugging you off completely, gaze piercing through your soul with a glare so lethal, it caused you to allow the washcloth to slip through your fingers and drop to the floor.

You didn't know why he was mad at you, usually he allowed you to clean him up whenever he got into fights.

At the cold, dismissive rejection you faced, you felt your eyes well up the slightest bit, trying so hard not to cry, or let it show on your face.

"But—"

You quickly shut your mouth the moment you spoke, realizing that you did not want to stir the waters of a tide that was already far too strong.

But it was too late. Mattheo had caught your slip up.

"But what?" he scoffed, mocking you, his voice rough and raw, the displeasure that laced his voice almost palpable, causing another whole load of feelings to wash over you in the form of tears that you managed to hold in once again.

Usually, the simple sight of your glazed eyes alone was enough for Mattheo to instantly shower you in affection and cheer you up. You were his princess, his precious darling.

Now, however, he seemed unaffected, slightly amused even, letting out an emotionless scoff at your silence.

"But what, Princess? Fucking spit it out," he demanded, voice low and gravelly, large hand coming to rest around your neck, exerting the slightest bit of pressure and asserting his clear dominance over you, a silent warning for you to continue.

You didn't know why he was being like this, so darn mean. His fingertips were cool against your throat, and would no doubt leave traces of blood against the pale skin of your neck.

"Why are you mad at me?" you whispered, averting your gaze to where your knees rested on the carpeted floor.

Once those words were spoken, it was as if the entire air in the common room shifted, and everything became dark and eerily dangerous.

"Why am I mad at you?" he crooned, mocking you as he repeated your question right back at you, his other hand slowly coming up to your face, the back of his fingers brushing against your cheek as he pressed a little harder into your throat before releasing it. "I don't know, Princess, you tell me..."

"I didn't do anything, Matty, I was just making friends, like you told me to—" you protested, blinking back the unshed tears that clung to your lashes, your wide, doe eyes staring up into those of your boyfriend.

It was no surprise that you weren't exactly a social butterfly. Far from it, actually. Known as the quiet, and shy bookworm from Slytherin, you usually hung around in the library or in quiet places, and it was only a matter of time that Mattheo's eyes fell on you, and you became his latest prize to conquer.

At first, it was merely watching from afar, noticing you, and all the little things you did. From always needing a lollipop whilst writing, or constantly running your middle finger across your brow when reading, Mattheo noticed everything.

Then, it became an obsession.

Then, it became a desire for possession.

And when he finally fulfilled this desire, and you were his, and his alone, the more he got to know you, the more he noticed how introverted you were.

You had no friends, and instantly shied off whenever anyone approached you, and Mattheo decided that he would help you grow more confident.

And today, when some older Slytherin approached you, Mattheo instantly noticed and chased him away, instantly dragging you away to the library.

"Friends, huh?" he seethed, a dry scoff full of irony slipping past his lips. "Oh, Princess, that fucktard didn't want to be your friend... He wanted to be more."

Your mouth opened like a goldfish, and you swallowed as you tried to understand what he had just said.

You hadn't noticed anything about that guy; he had seemed genuine

Before he could explain further, he had already stood up, leaving you alone to ponder his words, and was walking towards the steps that led to his dorm when you stood up and trailed after him, your hand grasping his elbow softly, pulling him towards you.

"Where are you going? What did I do? Why are you mad at me?" you asked, the tears finally spilling down your cheeks at the casual dismissal in his body language.

At his words, he spun around, his gaze sharp, piercing, his eyes blacker than ink as they bored into you with conviction.

"Because you're mine!" he growled, possession dripping from his words as he spoke, the vein underneath his jaw pulsing as his blood pumped through it rapidly. "Solely... mine!" he hissed, his voice low and rough as he leaned to speak into your ear, the heat of his breath warming your ear. "Is that clear, or do you need more to understand?"

Your expression was blank, and you wiped your tears, yet you made no show to indicate you had understood his statement, only angering him further.

"Looks like you need reminding, who you belong to," he tutted, his bruised hand grasping your shoulder and holding you mounted against the wall, his other bloody hand yanking up your skirt and exposing the delicate, sensitive skin on your thighs.

You gasped audibly at the adrenaline rush that filled you when you realized that anyone could walk into the empty common room and see you like this. You tried to protest, to say something, anything, but words failed you as soon as you felt the cold brush of his rings against your skin.

You whimpered softly

His index finger slowly raked across the damp lace of your panties, a dark chuckle leaving him as he flicked your folds through the fabric, causing you to whimper at his touch.

Hi dragged his hand across your inner thighs, painting them red, smearing the blood from his bruised and bloody knuckles all over your thighs, a visual reminder of the guy he had just beaten up for you.

"Matty— what.. what are you doing?" you finally got the courage to whisper, your throat tight, and your voice low. "A-any-anyone can walk in—"

He didn't answer you, ripping your panties off in one move and shoving them into his pocket— he would most definitely jerk off with them later on.

The cool air hit your sensitive folds, sending a jolt of arousal through you as you let out a sharp cry when you felt Mattheo insert a finger into your tight, little hole, his ring adding a cool splash to the slightly stinging flesh.

It was only when he grunted slightly, in pain, that you realized he was doing this with his bruised knuckles and broken fingers, the ones he had used to beat up that other guy.

Your eyes widened and you gasped, and a cry ripped from your throat when you felt him shove two fingers into your slick heat, your juices dripping down his fingers, mingling with the blood and sliding down to curl around his wrist.

"F-fuck, M-matty," you whimpered, squeezing your eyes shut at the pleasure that threatened to overwhelm you, your knees buckling and threatening to give way, if it weren't for his other hand that held you up.

He hiked one of your legs to wrap around his waist, his fingers curling and scissoring inside your heat. You nearly exploded with pleasure when he added a third finger into your pussy, but he quickly retracted his fingers before you could reach your high.

"This pretty little cunt belongs to me," Mattheo declared, shoving them back in roughly and pumping his fingers in and out of your hole, your walls clenching and unclenching around his fingers involuntarily. "Is that clear?"

Your moans echoed in his ears, and you nodded, your back pressed against the cold stone of the wall as your hands found a position in his hair.

You were completely gone, lost in the delicious way his long fingers penetrated your tight hole, in the way they curled around just the right amount to reach that fleshy spot that made you see stars.

You could feel the pressure buildup, and you could hear the sounds of your slick walls clenching pitifully around his fingers, as his eyes bored into you like a man possessed, taking in every bit of your reaction.

"That's it, make a mess on my hand, Princess— so fucking needy..." he muttered, bringing his mouth down to gently bite into your neck, sending shivers down your spine.

"I know you're so fucking close, do it— I want to feel you clamp around my fingers, so it— cum all over them..."

And God, with a shattering cry, you did. You tugged at his hair as your orgasm crashed through you, and your vision blackened, the surroundings replaced with colored dots.

You could barely hear your own cries, you had no sense of what you were saying or doing.

And all throughout your high, his fingers didn't relent, until your breathing slowed.

Mattheo brought his fingers to your lips, shoving them onto your tongue and forcing you to suck, giving you no choice in the matter.

"Lick it, every, single drop," he ordered, his dark eyes staring at you with amusement, watching your tongue trace all over his fingers as you lapped up your release and a mix of the blood that coated his fingers. "Don't you dare waste any..."

"Good fucking girl," he muttered, once his fingers were clean, retracting them from your mouth. "Next time, think carefully before giving your number to any Tom, Dick and Harry, alright?"

You nodded, too dumbfounded to do anything else.

His expression softened, and he slowly dropped a kiss to your forehead, smoothing down your skirt and patting the tiny bulge in his pocket, where your crumpled up panties rested.

"Goodnight, Princess."

And then he was gone, and when you slipped out of your daze, you caught sight of his dark curly hair as he ascended the stairs, before he disappeared out of sight.

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©nottslove 2025. do not copy, steal or claim any works/graphics as your own.

[tsunodaradio]

so pretty ⛐ 𝐎𝐏𝟖𝟏

THIS IS: FORMULA ONE 📀 he's so pretty when he goes down on you.

♫ starring: oscar piastri x girlfriend!reader. ♫ word count: 1.4k. ♫ includes: smut, romance. established relationship. pwp, oral [f receiving], fingering. @mary-op81 requested touch tank by quinnie. ♫ commentary box: tsunodaradio smut debut,, 😔 wrote this in one deranged sitting because what a request. and this clip of op? have mercy. 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

There are many ways to celebrate a race win. 

A raging bender with thumping music and free-flowing alcohol. A fine dining restaurant surrounded by your family and friends. A flight to the next country, where you might kill a couple of days enjoying the sights like a tourist. 

This is how Oscar celebrates— 

It’s almost painful, the way your fingers are entangled in his hair. But he’s fine, he’s used to this. He knows how you are. You’d never intentionally hurt him, and maybe a part of him preens at the way you’re holding on to him so tightly like it’s the only thing anchoring you to the world. 

Your back is arching up off the bed; your teeth, gnawing into your lower lip. He knows what that is, too. An attempt to keep quiet, to keep at bay the sounds he loves oh-so much. 

He wants to reach up, to gently pull at your chin so you’re not holding back on him. He wants to tell you something along the lines of don’t be quiet or I want to hear you, love or come on, you’ll give this to me, won’t you? 

As it is, though, his mouth is a little preoccupied at the moment. 

It had started like it always does. Slow kisses up your inner thigh, a couple of tortuous moments where his tongue had traced a path over the damp fabric of your underwear. He gave in at your first tearful plea, because you’re the love of his life and he refuses to have you begging for anything. 

Oscar isn’t sure if you’re aware, but this is one of his favorite things to do. He can get off on just this. The feeling of your body moving against his tongue, seeking more contact, trying to take more. The taste and smell of you flooding his senses, leaving his brain blissfully empty. 

Everything is practiced. The stripes he licks up your core, the fingers he teases at your cunt. When you let out a low whimper, he pauses, perking up just enough to see if it’d been a sound of pain or pleasure. 

His tongue darts out over your soaking folds before he finally speaks, the words whispered right into your very core. “Keep going?” 

He dares to glance up at you, and oh. Oh. Oscar’s pants are already impossibly tight, but his cock still gives a little twitch at the sight of how much need is written over your face.

“Keep going,” you say through your teeth, the words nothing short of a command. “Don’t you dare stop—”

Wouldn’t dream of it, he nearly quips. The dry retort dies in his throat when your fingers clumsily reach down to try rubbing your puffy clit. It’s Oscar’s turn to bite back a moan, because he wants to be the one doing that. 

“Yes, ma’am,” he murmurs, tilting his head up just enough to push your fingers away. 

His tongue flattens against your clit, licking slowly and carefully. It’s a disastrous one-two, the way he takes the sensitive bundle of nerves into his mouth and sucks while also finally, finally pushing his fingers into you.

There are days where Oscar is rough, is clinical and practical in his lovemaking. Make no mistake: He always makes sure you finish, never leaves you unsatisfied. But he’s a busy man, and he’s more logical than he is sentimental, and so sex can sometimes be a means to an end. 

Then there are days like this, when Oscar likes to take his time. He’s not teasing, because all it takes is one tearful ask from you and his resolve is good as gone. He’s just— gentle. 

Oscar can be gentle when he wants to be. 

It’s moments like these that get you. Has you thrashing on the hotel bed, has you canting your hips up to seek more of his mouth, like you’re barely resisting the urge to start fucking into his face. 

He has to keep one hand firmly pressed against your knee to keep your legs somewhat parted. Your thighs are already tight on either side of his head, and it’s taking everything in him not to finish in his jeans like a virgin who’s never done shit like this before. 

The sounds are obscene; the feeling, addicting. There’s nowhere else Oscar would rather be right now. Not some swanky speakeasy or Michelin star restaurant.

A hotel room with you— the lights down low, your clothes all on the floor— is the best way he could celebrate. 

Your fingers tighten at Oscar’s hair. You use the hold to pull his head up, to tug his face away from your core. He nearly whines at the loss, but then you’re speaking to him in that beautiful, hoarse tone of yours. 

“‘M going to finish,” you pant, and Oscar’s fingers still inside you, pressed right over the spot that usually has you seeing stars. “Where do you—” 

“Is that even a question?” he grunts. 

He’s a little bewildered, like the thought of there being any other answer is so foreign to him. He’s always had trouble denying you, had trouble telling you no. In most cases, really, it’s you who’s more stubborn between the two of you. You’re a woman who takes and he’s hopelessly in love with you, his heart in the palm of your hands.

And so he wants to watch you fall to pieces for him. He wants to watch you shake and writhe and shiver because of his mouth. He wants to have something over you— just a little bit. 

Just so he knows he’s not the only one going crazy. 

He leans back down and redoubles his efforts. He bullies his fingers into your weeping cunt a little faster, laps his tongue a little more enthusiastically. His ears are ringing and he can barely hear your broken moans, the choice words of please and there and more as you give up on keeping quiet. 

And then you’re finishing, the sound tearing out of you something like a groan, a scream, a whine. Your eyes have squeezed shut as you thrust right up into Oscar’s mouth, gushing into his mouth in the way you only ever do when he’s like this. 

He’s wrecked. Absolutely wrecked. Completely, entirely, fully wrecked.

He keeps his fingers inside you for a little longer, enjoying the way you clench around his digits. It reminds him of what’s to come. He shivers, his pants suddenly uncomfortable and damp; his breath coming in warm, short pants over your sensitive skin. 

“Oscar,” you rasp, squirming underneath him. 

“I know, I know,” he chuckles. The overstimulation is probably beginning to take hold. He knows better than to push his luck. 

He finally gathers enough of his brain to lift his head and look at you, he’s struck by the way you look. Hair mussed, eyelids fluttering, chest heaving in an attempt to catch your breath. 

He thinks you look like the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

It takes a beat too long for him to come back to himself, for his head to grow a little clearer and his mind to stop spinning. Oscar moves out from beneath your thighs until he’s lying beside you, still shaking and sweating and panting right along with you.

When he turns his head towards you, his eyes are half-lidded and his mouth is still shiny with you.

With shaking fingers, you reach out to brush some of your release off his lips. It’s almost a reflex, the way he leans in and presses a soft kiss to the pad of your thumb. He lets you see the aftermath, lets you watch him as he slowly composes himself, lets you realize just how much power you have over him.

He may be a perfect driver who just had a perfect weekend, but you bring him to his knees. 

That’s not what you’re thinking, though. He realizes that much when he catches the words you mutter, like they’re an afterthought as much as they are a fact. 

“You’re so pretty when you go down on me,” you say softly, reverently. 

Oscar gives you a breathless, fond laugh in response. He wants to argue that there’s nothing pretty about him, not when his hair is disheveled and his cheeks are flushed pink. But if you say so, if you insist— 

He leans forward to press a chaste kiss to the corner of your mouth, enough so that you could probably dart your tongue out and taste yourself, if you wanted to. 

“That’s good,” he hums. “Because I’m about to go again.” ⛐

[kireilien]

obsessed.

pair. bf!seungcheol x fem!reader; wc. 2,737

tw/cw. nsfw content, cursing, intentional lowercase, not proofread, alcohol use; plot heavy story, angst-ish?, dom!seungcheol, sub!reader, race neutral reader, reader is an overthinker, food play, alcohol consumption, wam (wet and messy), slight spit play, kissing, oral (f receiving), cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, nipple play, unprotected sex, doggy style over the counter, hair pulling, use of “cheol,” and “baby” 

note. please don’t fucking eat people out do anything w alcohol like this, this is fiction THIS IS FAKE 

synopsis. thinking of how shit your life was, you genuinely thought your boyfriend would break up with you. turns out he never would because he’s way too obsessed with you!

you felt like all of your feelings overwhelmed you. work has been terrible. your personal life is as shitty as it could be. you and your boyfriend have been distant more than ever. everything. literally everything in your life was actually horrible. 

day after day. 

afternoon after afternoon. 

night after night.

it just repeats. every single damn time. nothing is new to you anymore. you wake up. get ready for work. step into the office. get yelled off by your coworkers and boss. work over time because you’re the only one who doesn’t have any plans. get home. eat a shitty ass meal. get unready. sleep. then it repeats.

so what could you be doing out of all the days of rest? it's watching movies on your living room couch and just being a complete slob. you’ve never let it got this low. you turned your phone on silent, left your laptop away, and the only thing electronic with you was your tv. 

time passes. your low and hazy-like eyes shift to the clock onto the top left of your tv screen, barely even focusing.

10:30/22:30.

huh. didn’t know being a slob was that much of a waste of time. in a blink of an eye, the day has already passed. 

without much of a thought, you knew that there weren’t going to be any important notifications besides the typical notifications you would get from random apps on your phone that you didn’t bother to turn off. 

but to your surprise, there was something important.

missed calls from your boyfriend, seungcheol.

you regretted seeing those missed calls. you haven’t been the greatest partner these past few months to him. your life came crashing down, what could you do?

reluctantly so, you picked up one of his calls. 

the last call out of all five he sent was approximately two hours ago. surely he’d be active, right? there weren’t any voicemails left by his number anyways. you were slightly scared though when the echoing ring filled your right ear from your phone being flat against it.

you grit your teeth. what if he wanted to break up? it wasn’t gonna be a surprise if he wanted to. like before, being a shitty partner and being absent in all ways isn’t the best partner. yet, a small, painful ping in your heart says you could’ve done better.

it picks up.

“y/n?” seungcheol exhales.

you’ve missed his voice like crazy. you temporarily forgot why he was your boyfriend in the first place. he’s the first man who really made you feel love in your heart rather than your other exes.

“cheol,” you smile behind the phone.

“can i come over?” he sighs.

you immediately felt your smile and heart fall after you hear those four words. he was definitely going to break up with you. you couldn’t believe it. you swore to yourself you could’ve prevented it. you were just too late.

“cheol. i’m so sorry,” your teeth were clenched but, you carried on, “i wish i could’ve been better for you. you don’t need to come over. i’m so, so sorry.”

before you knew it, your water line fills with salty tears; daringly about to fall and roll down your cheeks.

“y/n, what the fuck do you mean?” seungcheol laughs lightly against the phone. you could hear a bag rustle in the background of his call with a few glass bottles getting put into that said bag. “baby, i’m coming over. we’re talking but we are definitely not breaking up.”

you took a moment to recollect what just happened in the last few seconds. seungcheol isn’t mad at you. he isn’t breaking up with you either?

after a quick pause and a quick wiping of your eyes, you continued the conversation, “uhm, sure. what’re you doing?”

“let’s have a drink. we haven’t drank any soju in a while, have we?” he mumbles a bit after hearing him shuffling out the door while exiting his apartment complex.

“oh. yeah, we haven’t. when you coming?” you were glad he wasn’t angry, but you were still confused why he wasn’t.

“like uhh, gonna be there in 10?” seungcheol hums as you hear the dragging of his slippers against the concrete of his complex garage.

“cool, ‘kay see you then, cheol,” you sigh in relief. unconsciously, you were picking at the sides of your couch pillows in nervousness though. 

“yeah, see ‘ya, baby.” he ends the call as he turns on his engine of his car.

your phone drops beside you; lightly bouncing on the fabric of your couch. you were definitely gonna get a small earful of what seungcheol has to say about you worrying. he hates hearing you worry. 

but never mind that. you at least wanted to tidy yourself up before seungcheol arrives. so, you changed out to newer pajamas and headed over to the kitchen to pull out your cute matching shot glasses, remembering how it was still early on into your relationship when you got them.

you still remember your weekly drinking sessions with cheol. they were so giggly. sometimes glum, most times intimate and borderline sexual. nonetheless, you also missed drinking with him. you miss the nights where it was just the two of you alone. no one ever joined in. it was because it was a secret between you and him. just a night. for the two of you.

as you were lost in your romantic thoughts, seungcheol rings the doorbell. lightly skipping over, you swing the door open to your ever-so handsome boyfriend. everything from his tousled deep black hair, white tee, gray loose zip up, some black sweats, and his black slippers that you heard over the phone, was just perfect.

the little thumps in your heart came again. just like a few months back when you still visited him often.

“soju?” he gleefully lifts up the crinkled plastic bag while tilting his head down to place a small kiss against your lips. 

you return this kiss while nodding, “i have our shot glasses out.” 

taking off his slippers, you guide him to your kitchen counter where your glasses are. cheol snickers at them, still remembering those fond memories of the two of you drinking every week.

“shall we?” you grin.

“we shall,” he reciprocates.

opening up a brand new bottle of soju, specifically the blue bottle by jinro, seungcheol pours out some for the both of you. “no tricks this time?” you poke at your boyfriend.

he rolls his eyes. he always used to do those fancy tricks when he drank. cheol sighs and closes the bottle up again. he flips the bottle, making his arms crossed to open it up again and rearranged his hands again to flick some of the alcohol towards you. you flinch away from the splatter, giggling at his attempts to have some fun.

finally, the two of you brought your respective shot glasses up to have a small clink for a cheers and shot it down your mouths in a quick second. the gasp of the cool alcohol leaves your lips, already needing more of the addicting drink.

one shot, down.

half a bottle, down.

one bottle, down.

another half bottle, down.

before you knew it, the both of your brains started to cog a different way than before. you could already tell by the silence in between all the shots the two of you took.

after the moments of silence, cheol speaks up, “y’know. i’ve missed you,” he murmurs with his tired eyes. 

you snicker, “how can you miss me when i’ve been the shittiest girlfriend ever? i never pick up your calls or texts. i never—.” before you could even continue, seungcheol immediately shuts you up by pressing his lips against yours for a quick second.

“you really needa stop doing that. i miss you. that’s it. i’m obsessed with you at this point. not even just now, i’ve been obsessed with you. there’s no other way around it,” he sighs while softly tap-slapping your cheek.

“oh, really?” you twiddle with your shot glass, rolling it between your fingers.

“yes, really.” seungcheol is confused why you’re dragging this out for so long. why couldn’t you just realize it?

“hey,” he breaths out.

“what?” you retort back.

“how about i show you how obsessed i am with you,” cheol simpers.

“sure.” you liked how this was going.

seungcheol immediately attaches your lips with his again, however in a romantic-like gesture. his hands slide onto your body so fluidly he reaches down, all the way to your hips. while yours found their way up and about in his hair. you could both taste the soju dancing along your mouths, loving the way it mixed into your saliva. 

quickly enough, breaths began to get rapid. the two of you were almost animalistic with each other; hands were everywhere. seungcheol’s grunts and your whines were more than enough to understand that the both of you couldn’t get enough of each other. you still didn’t believe the man you thought you lost was making your mouth messy with his.

“fuck it,” cheol let’s your plumped lips go and downs the rest of the soju remained in the bottle. but, he leaves half of it still in his mouth, waiting for someone to drink the rest. that someone, is you.

he returns back the kiss, allowing the alcohol slip down your mouth, ingesting it along with the enhancing wetness of his spit from the soju beforehand. you were well dizzy from this point on. not from the drinking though. it was purely from seungcheol. he’s driving you crazy, nothing like ever before.

you couldn’t help yourself. you needed him so, so, bad. you zip off his zip up jacket, throwing it across the kitchen somewhere; as well as his shirt to reveal his bulky figure he’s been building up these past few months. 

cheol was ravenous. you didn’t know if it was from the buzzing from the alcohol or the making out, but he was sure enough it was just from you. 

he slips off your pants and underwear, leaving you bottom naked for him to prop you up on your cold kitchen counter. you lay back on your propped up elbows to give him a wide view of your dripping cunt, out and ready for him to use. 

taking another bottle from his bag, seungcheol twists open another bottle of soju to pour a few drops over cunt for him. “fuck— i need you, cheol. i need you so bad.” you whimper under his touch.

“i got you, baby, lemme make you feel so good,” he mutters a bit before outlining your sopping pussy, kissing a few times over. seungcheol hooks his bulky arms underneath your thighs to have you lie completely down the counter to make sure he has all of you, melting in his hands.

at this point the soju, his saliva, and your juices covered your inner thighs. you couldn’t bare to open your eyes. cheol made you crazy. he knew how to mess with your head. his hands even pulled down to slide his thumbs on the edges of your inner lips to extend his view of your pretty cunt. 

you were melting on the counter. your hands were tangling his hair, legs were hooked were propped on his back, and you didn’t give a single fuck of how loud you were being. moan after whine after whimper was continuously falling with seungcheol’s name. you couldn’t help it.

soon after, the knot in your stomach felt tighter and tighter in seconds. “fuck—! cheol ‘m gonna—!” you groaned out.

“come on my face, baby— lemme taste your sweet cum,” he sighs against your drenched cunt.

in a matter of seconds the knot in you snapped, causing you to release your cum all over seungcheol’s face. he laps your juices to make sure he tasted all of you and comes back up to your face, “god, baby— you see— literally obsessed enough to eat you out with alcohol dripping down your pretty pussy,” he mumbles as he stares into your eyes while taking his hand to dip down and rub small rings around your clit.

“more— i need more, cheol.”

“take off this top, baby, i’ll give you more.”

you discard your shirt to some other place in the kitchen as cheol shoots down the rest of alcohol in the bottle in his mouth. seungcheol then latches his mouth around your right nipple. your mouth shot open with strings of curses leaving your lips, relishing in the coldness from the soju, as well as the warmth of his mouth. 

his lips danced between both of your nipples and down to your stomach, back up to your lips. “slide down, baby. i wanna fuck you— wanna fuck you so bad,” cheol groans in your ear. you nod quickly before pressing your torso down against the semi-cold and semi-hot counter. 

seungcheol strips himself as quickly as he possibly could and lines himself against your cunt; nearly breathless. the vibrations from your whines buzzes against your cheek. you were on overdrive at this point. your brain was mush, and it was about to become every bit more mushed.

with one quick push, cheol bottoms himself out completely in you; gaining two hearty moans from the both of your mouths. 

after a few pauses, cheol whispers against your ear, “you good, baby?”

“mhm, please, fuck me, cheol.”

cheol slides his hands under your hips to slide yourself on and off your cock. the slickness of your cunt and the soju claps between cheol’s cock. although the pace was slow at first, the speed and intensity soon picked up. 

you couldn’t contain your moans of movement. your hands started to become sporadic. your hands gripped onto the edge of the counter to the flat middle of the counter. seungcheol noticed your hands but his eyes eventually trailed to the a few bottles still unopened in his plastic bag.

he stopped his movements and slipped his hands out from your hips to open up another bottle. as one hand holds the bottle cheol’s other hand slides up to your hair and pulls it back, making your back flesh against his chest. “you haven’t drank that much tonight, baby. care for a drink?” seungcheol seductively hums in your ear.

your mouth slacks open for cheol to pour a good amount of the soju for you to gulp down. a sigh of relief exits your mouth from the soju but that was soon interrupted by a sudden snap of cheol’s hips. his tip just grazes your cervix from that snap, causing you to gasp.

“you seem to like the drink more than my dick, baby.” cheol tsked from your reaction. 

“no— i don’t! fuck me, cheol. i love your cock. i’m obsessed with it,” you frantically try to buck your hips back to fuck your self back on his cock.

he chuckles at your weak attempts of fucking yourself back on his cock. “here, drink the rest, will you? lemme make you feel good.” seungcheol passes the bottle off as his hands finds your hips again to sharply snap his hips against yours.

meanwhile, you could barely hold the cold rim against your lips. with each thrust up, you caught a tremble in the glass. you needed to get this over with. you didn’t care that the strong liquid pours over your chin and onto the countertops. with quick gulps, the majority of the soju was gone.

finally, you could focus on cheol’s cock. the glass rings from the sudden hit of your hands to the countertop, literally nothing could phase you past your boyfriends cock. it was too heavenly to focus on anything else.

the thick veins on his dick are pulsing from the friction between him and the slickness of your cunt; just dripping from arousal. your moans and whines intertwined with cheol’s grunts and groans; it was almost too erotic.

eventually, cheol’s thrusts started to become stronger yet, slower. with a few more pumps, the both of you came; coating each other in your sticky fluids. after a few hearty breaths, seungcheol comes close to your face.

“can’t you see i’m obsessed with you?” seungcheol kisses your cheek gently. 

“yeah— can now,” you smile from his kiss.

even then, you were already obsessed with seungcheol from the start.

© KIREILIEN 2025 | please like, repost, and/or comment! ♡︎

[maudie-duan]

Summary: You were an almost lover, now a hushed whisper in the dark when his Ex moves back to town. Nothing is worse than a love than a love triangle you weren't expecting--old flames, new love, and lingering feelings, but who's the real winner when everyone gets hurt?

Warnings: 18+All Angst, Mentions: Cheating. Sexual Situations.

Word Count: 4.3k

Harry's POV

I was the only one in love.

I know that now.

Not to say that Leah didn’t love me, but love should never be possessive.

And by the end, I was her possession. 

Leah had me under her thumb, suffocating me, slowly sucking the love from what we had. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t convince her I was in love. It was never enough. I thought saying it more would fix it, and maybe for a little while, it did, but then she got bored, and she made new friends. She started building this whole other life without me, and I respected that. I understood, but the more I understood, the more she pressed into me harder.

Fight after fight.

The two of us tearing into each other, every word a vicious act to match each other stride for stride, waiting for each hurtful blow to land. Did it hurt? Will it hurt later?

We didn’t care.

Was it love that excused every wrongful transgression, or was it fear? By the end, love for me became a desperate act, on my fucking knees begging as Leah slipped away and me pretending that with every apology, I forgave—forgiving until my heart bled with it, icy with the final blow.

The cheating.

Now, she’s back, my name falling off her lips as if there could be no one else like there hasn’t been anyone else, and that shadow of resentment that keeps following me around sweeps up to hang over me like a black mass I can’t rip my eyes from, yet I said I could forgive, but I can’t seem to forget—a year wasn’t enough, a year didn’t scratch the surface, mend the ache that still lingers with every fight, the pain looming at the surface.

And what is it that Leah wants because I still feel her trying to press me under her thumb? 

She wanted to come back; she wanted forgiveness I gave it. She wanted a second chance; we’re doing it. How many times am I going to let her build up the idea that we’re meant to be when, deep down, every word that she fills my head with is forced, made up to have me right where she wants me so she can leave me here, dangling by a thread, steal my focus so I can never stand my own ground, and for what? Just to say she had me?

And maybe this time, she’s the only one in love because I don’t think this is love anymore. I keep searching for the things that will lead me back to the love I felt before. Everything that should remind me of Leah reminds me of the one person who doesn’t deserve to be left in the dark, and that’s you.

That’s what I’m doing.

The other day, I asked you what you wanted. What I should have asked was where you saw this going. At that moment, I was terrified. The thought of losing you had never crossed my mind, but I saw that look on your face, and the sadness I never thought I was capable of bringing filled your eyes, gutting me before I could even open my mouth. 

A fool.

And now I wish there were things you said to me, so many things, like telling me I was a coward for thinking you didn’t deserve answers when you did. Tell me I was a fool for thinking I could have both, that I could fall back on you when I wanted to escape a past that was coming back to haunt me. I’m sorry that I left you in the dark. I’m sorry if you ever felt you weren’t worthy of an apology.

Maybe one day you’ll let me come back and say the things I should have said to you—It’s always sorry—it’s always that vision of you on your knees, your hands covering your face, that embezzles my thoughts. That stupid line, ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’ I thought it was genuine like it could ease your suffering. My final line was the knife’s edge, ‘Hopefully, it won’t be weird seeing me around,’ like it wasn’t already weird.

I made it weird; I made it hurt.

I hope you know these are the things I think about before I fall asleep.

Did you cut the tether yet because sometimes I still feel you pulling?

Is it ruined before it even had a chance to begin? If I came groveling back even more broken, would you take me back because I miss you, I miss your bed, I miss the way you smelled on my skin—I miss the balance. When I saw you cry that day, I hated myself and who I was becoming to you. I’m sorry I didn’t handle it well—without you here, I don’t know what to do with myself; you were the one who filled my days. 

I hope you know this scares me to death. 

I was watching what you did the night you saw me with my arm around Leah’s waist; I looked you dead in the eyes and moved my hand away. I hoped it made you happy, gave you a glimpse of my headspace, that all my thoughts were of you, and that I cared what you thought. I know I’ve crossed so many lines already I wish you could tell me which path I needed to take, the one that leads back to you, to us, because I can’t remember the last time I felt that happy.

The love that Leah brought back was bare. I bet you already knew the game she was playing. You’re clever. Did you figure out the ending before we did? How did you handle it with such grace and give me space before I even knew I needed it? I keep thinking back to the last time I knocked on your door. I know the other times were drunk and pathetic, but that time, I came to you with intention. I wanted to feel something real, a connection I didn’t have to force, feel the connection I made with you because that was real. 

Easy.

We barely spoke “us” into existence, and then it was there. 

All you were asking for was clarity, and I lashed out, dredging up old patterns, the learned behavior that killed my spirit over time, leaving my past on your doorstep. I called you crazy. Well, I was crazy for even putting you through an ounce of this bullshit, me living my life all wrong, letting Leah pull me along, her stupid mind games roping you in the middle of it all. 

It got complicated.

Then I lied. 

You said it was yes or no, and I told you it wasn’t that simple. 

Would it change your mind if I said you were right?

I think I’m in love with you.

I’m in love with someone else, was all I could think, staring into Leah’s pleading eyes. I had so little to say to her, yet my mind was filled with all the words I knew she wanted me to say. Leah on her knees, her tears spilling over, and I felt nothing, and all I had was time now, so much time, and when she crawled into my lap, I let her, and when she said “One last time,” it’s the first time in a long time that I believed her. 

And then all I can think is, ‘I’m sorry.’

I’m sorry that our ending had to be at the expense of first love’s antics, the childish growing pains that maybe we had to endure to move on. They say love hurts, but I never knew it could feel like this. If I tried to explain my heart, would you forgive me? Because I think I’ve figured out my downfall, my weakness. I have a tendency to live in my head, a daydreamer, spinning realities I think will come true—that was me with Leah in thinking that our love could last forever, and that was me with us thinking that we could stay in the grey, that it could save us from any kind of hurt. 

I see it now.

And now the space between us is growing further and further.

You saw me in the library the other day, and when we met eyes, you raised your brows, a slight glimmer of excitement, and I watched it slip away in seconds, your shoulders slumping. You moved your eyes to the empty seat next to you—a song and dance we would grow used to—then you stood to gather your things. It hurt, but I deserved it. I promise I wasn’t going to be heartless, sit next to you like nothing happened. I told Sam about Leah and how we called it quits for good. Did you hear? 

Your absence is growing louder than all the parties I never see you at. Is it because of me? If I asked you, would you tell me? I would stay home. You can have all our old marching grounds, all the places I know you enjoy more, the friends I know that like you more, the friends that probably only tolerated me because of you. You made me better; you gave me depth in a world I was falling flat in. I said I miss your bed, I miss the way you smelled on my skin, but what I miss most is our friendship, the ebb, and flow of your companionship; while yes, the other stuff was amazing, I could do without it if it meant I could keep my friend.

We were friends, right?

Somehow in the easy give and take, you became my best friend.

Will I see you again? I can be patient, but do you think you’ll give me a chance? I promise I could be so good to you. Are you giving me space? Or is it truly ruined? Even if you told me there was no chance, the words would hold a cruel kindness I’m willing to endure, and the painstaking fact of it all is this is probably how you’ve felt for months now. It’s been two months since Leah; it probably feels like a lifetime to you.

And just when I thought all hope was lost, you walked through Sam’s door. I thought my heart would stop, your presence taking me completely. You gave me a taste of my own medicine, barely glancing my way all night, keeping yourself preoccupied. I spent that night keeping tabs on you, spotting you anytime you moved. Could you feel it? Could you feel me? Because I swear, you were the only one in that room for me. Before you left, you came and stood by the beer pong table, watching the game Sam and I were wrapped up in. I looked at you just as I tossed the ball. My gaze trained on you, and you held it, and just as cheers erupted, me hitting my mark and making a cup, a smile ghosted over your lips, and you turned away, heading for the door. 

I could feel the tether still there, and you pulled.

The days I miss you most are the days my head is filled with the most questions, the times when no one gets my jokes when I’m an asshole, and my bold sense of humor is too much for the ears they land on. Mostly girls, the ones trying to win my attention; they’re not even a second thought, I promise. Are you bored? Are there things you miss about me?

If we ever talk about anything, can we talk about that day everyone met up for pizza, and I didn’t know that you would be there? My fucking professor made me late, and I rushed to get there in time, and the first thing I saw was you and the empty chair next to you. I hope you know that I wouldn’t have been offended if you wanted to trade seats when Sam offered. Tell me I’m foolish to believe you wanted me there, right next to you—lie to me��but please don’t ever tell me it was because you didn’t want to cause a scene.

Because they all know. Everyone knows I fumbled it with you, but I would rather hear it from your mouth. 

God, I was lucky. So lucky to have you. 

You were the only girl that wasn’t throwing yourself at me. You were a breath of fresh air. What if I told you I liked you all along, that once I was free, my eyes were on you, that when Leah left that first time, I noticed you, but when did you notice me? Was it the night we had to carry Alex to the car? I think about that night often. You were such a trooper for that. I know you guys were hooking up or something, but you showed true compassion that night. I think any other girl would have left that fucker, yet you continued on. 

Was it for me? 

Or is it another foolish thought?

A saint you were, lugging around that asshole. I told you later that I barely looked when your boobs were bouncing in that tank top, nearly spilling out when you bent to lift his drunk body. I lied, I was fucking obsessed with you, thinking I couldn’t believe Alex would fuck it up, and now how dumb am I? I’m still obsessed with you, but I’ve been taking time to actually be single, to not fall into that hopeless behavior as before. Another bed isn’t going to answer these questions, all the things I wish you said to me. I can be single for as long as I need. 

I’ll wait.

I’ll wait because what other choice do I have? I keep seeing you around, but you keep a safe distance. Am I really unapproachable? Do you not have questions? Do you feel like our connection was fleeting? Sam told me that you asked about me and asked how I was doing after everything. I wish it was a question you never had to ask. Are you coming around to the idea of me? Or was it out of pity?

The other day, when finals finally hit, the only place I could go was the dreaded library. Who knew it would become a graveyard for all my misgivings? The place was so full, and I was desperate for a seat. The only spot was at the end of your table. I thought, what are the fucking odds? And I stood there from afar, watching you, your nose pointed down, vigorously writing something down. I didn’t do it on purpose, interrupt you, but please know it was my only choice, and when I started to approach you, it was like you knew; your head whipped in my direction, then at your table, the open spot at the end. 

Your eyes scanned your surroundings, the realization of our predicament dawning on you just as our eyes met, and I asked you if I could sit, promising I wouldn’t bother you. I thought you’d gather your stuff, leave me feeling hopeless and dumb for even approaching you, but you simply said, “Sure,” nodding your head toward the empty seat, and I forced my legs in motion, my whole body trembling, my heart racing at the thought of sharing even a fraction of your space, breathing the same air you were breathing, and like an idiot I clumsily set my things up as hateful glares from students around us pleaded with me to be silent. 

A breathy little laugh rose up your chest, and you sealed your lips shut, smoothing them together to hide your ongoing smile. I felt my body relax then, your eyes catching mine. When they moved back to your paper, I watched you shift in your seat, your spine straightening. You turned the page in your book, continuing as if nothing had just happened, but I hope you know I held onto that moment for days.

And all the while, you kept giving me these tiny little moments to keep, to savor, when the thought of not having you haunted me. 

At some point, there was a shift, a point that led to this moment where you’re standing at the other end of the beer pong table. Your smile beaming right through me, at the little moments of kindness giving way to normalcy that seems to fit because this is how it happened before, right? All the little moments. Except this time you started it, because when did it start? 

Every thought leads back to the library, a stepping stone to tolerance. 

Finals sucked us all in and spit us out, all of us crawling back to the social scene in small strides. I saw you standing in Sam’s kitchen one night, you know, the very place I kissed you that first time, taking us both by surprise. I couldn’t remember the last time I was that nervous to kiss someone new. You were standing in that same spot, the very spot where you wrapped your arms around my neck and pressed into the kiss. Did you remember? When you were standing there talking to your friends, did it cross your mind? And when Sam roped me into the conversation, you didn’t even flinch. 

Did you want me there?

Another time, I saw you standing in line for the bathroom at a party I wasn’t expecting you to be at. I didn’t even have to use the bathroom. I just wanted to see if you would figure out a way to excuse yourself. We locked eyes as soon as I filled in the space behind you, and I laughed to myself, thinking maybe this would be us, me always trying to find the empty spaces in your life to fit myself into. You muttered, “Hey,” Then turned back to the person you were talking to in line. She was the next to go in, so I knew I would have you alone in no time.

A hopeless fool, a desperate fool.

The girl was so drunk I don’t know how you kept your cool, carrying on a half-hearted conversation on your end because I could tell you we’re vibing, but she wouldn’t have known the difference, she could have talked to a wall I’m sure. The girl spotted me behind you like I hadn’t been standing there long enough to hear her talking about a guy she was trying to hook up with; then she said:

“Oh my god…speaking—of hot guys to hook up with—” her words loud, and you both turned to look at me then, my face burning, thinking if this girl even knew, and I waited for your reaction, but your eyes just drifted down my shirt, the one you said was your favorite. Then the door clicked open, stealing everyone’s attention, and you turned the girl in the direction of the door. She slurred the line “Good luck, girl” over her shoulder, and you laughed. 

I thought you would look back at me after she went in, but you didn’t. I could see the faint glow of your phone screen, and you stood there busying yourself. That was the first time we had been that close, me close enough to feel the warmth emanating from your body. I had to force myself to breathe, my face sometimes turning toward you to take in that familiar smell, and when you shoved your phone into your back pocket, you crossed your arms and pressed your shoulder into the wall. Could you feel it? 

The tether buzzing with the past? 

You must have felt it because your face shifted, your eyes meeting mine, you gazing over your shoulder at me, your face void of any expression, a curious daze in your eyes. I didn’t know what to say, my words clogging the back of my throat. Then drunk girl spilled out of the bathroom, robbing your attention, and just like that, we were strangers again, you moving to help the stumbling girl, your hands suddenly full as she laughed into your neck, cooing at you in the way drunk girls seem to take on new best friends, and you were hers.

“I’m going to help her.” You said, directing your words at me, and I pushed myself off the wall, ready to help.

“Do you need a hand?” I asked, ready to lend a helping hand as you slung her arm around your shoulder. 

You laughed at this, “No—No—I think this is how it happened the first time…” Then you turned away with a smile on your face, and I stood there trying to register your words. It took someone nudging my shoulder to keep the line moving, and when I closed myself into the bathroom, I had to laugh, thinking back to that night with Alex. It was like you were answering one of the many tormenting questions, and now obsession wouldn’t even touch the surface of how I felt. 

That was the door opening, just a crack, you leaving a crumb for me to pick up, and I turned that crumb into a fucking feast.

So now, everything that’s happened in the empty spaces we’ve filled with tiny glances, a faint smile, a lingering stare from across the room. A “Hi” here and a “Bye” there equated to this very moment, and when you land the winning shot, sinking your ping pong ball into the final cup. Sam pipes up, apologizing for making the game more competitive than needed, insisting everyone shake hands and call some kind of truce.

You’re all smiles, darting over to Sam as I reach forward and shake your friend’s hand, who gives me one of those death glares, one of the hundreds she’s given me since things ended, but I can say they have lessened, so maybe that’s progress. She squeezes my hand hard, and I take the hint; then she releases my hand, and we both turn to watch you and Sam caught up in one of the many silly moments you guys tend to get lost in. I was on the fence about whether or not I should stand there waiting because the moment seemed to be slipping by. I was on the verge of feeling stupid, but I really wanted this moment with you. My only saving grace was that your friend was still there, which meant I still had a chance.

A hopeless fool.

When your eyes caught mine from over Sam’s shoulder, you laughed, your eyes lighting up, a bit tipsy, your magnetic energy filling the room, “Oh no! We’re not good sports if we don’t shake everyone’s hand, Sam!” You yell, eyes on me the whole time, then they move to your friend, and you reach out, my heart racing when Sam playfully shakes mine, pushing past me when someone calls their name. 

And then it was just us.

I caught your friend whispering something in your ear right before she slipped away. You had one of those cunning smiles as you rolled your eyes, and then you looked at me. I could only guess what she was saying. I’m sure it didn’t take a rocket scientist. Your smile dropped slightly, and you took a step toward me, but all I could do was smile as my heart leaped out of my chest, all the noise around me dull because, at that moment, you were the only one in that room, the only one that mattered, you were the world itself, and call me dramatic, but the brain has a funny way of playing out moments in our heads, and I had been waiting for this one for a long time. 

“Good game—” You said, holding out your hand to fist pump me, and I had to laugh, me staring down at your hand, thinking, of course, it wouldn’t be that simple. 

I clicked my tongue, “I don’t get a proper handshake, huh?” and this makes you laugh, your hand stationary, and I wrapped my hand around your fist, pulling you toward me as I leaned into your ear and said:

“This isn’t rock, paper, scissors…” And you liked this because you laughed then, eyes level with mine. Your free hand came up to my chin and cupped it, playfully jostling it back and forth.

“It is if I say it is…Mr.” 

The words sent a jolt down my spine, a mix of fear and excitement. You let my chin drop, my mouth splaying open, leaving me dumbfounded. But I collected myself quickly, righting myself, and nodded my head. “I hear you loud and clear—trust me—” I tell you, all smiles gone, but the corner of your mouth is still turned up, so I know the message isn’t a threat.

The next morning, I woke up to a missed call from you and one new voicemail: 

“Hello…”

…

“Hello? Harry…?”

…

“Oh, fuck—it’s leaving a message—shit…”

…

“Um—hi. Fuck. I didn’t want to leave a message, but fuck um…I wanted to talk to you—obviously—I hate leaving messages, and I think I’m drunk…so I’m just going to fucking say it, okay—I miss you, like a lot, and you’re so fucking annoying—there I said it—and I can’t stand that you’re like a good guy—I think—I don’t—yeah, I think you must be a good guy…you haven’t fucked someone else since Leah. I haven’t heard anything. I don’t know why that matters. Damn. Can I delete this? Fuck. Hang up…I mean, I’m hanging up.”

…

“Bye. I’m hanging up. Bye—shit.”

A/N: Yes, I left you on a cliffhanger...but good news! There will be a Part 4! Sorry! don't have me!!

Taglist: Let me know in the comments if you want to be tagged for this series. @sassamanda77 @panini @unfuckwitablenarry @triski73 @haleyannaw @dipmeinhoneyh @angeldavis777 @matildasatellite @cendrineee @prettygurl-2009 @harry2121 @fangirl509east @bethiegurl19 @lizsogolden

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[i-dared-myself]

You and I

Bang Chan x reader

In which Chan finds someone like him, and he believes you need his help, no matter how much you protest.

18+

Cw: Yandere Chan, murder, blood, torture, a bit of gore but not too much, smut, kidnapping, Stockholm syndrome honestly, fucked up stuff, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (DO NOT DO), um… kinda nasty ngl. It’s inspired by Railway, so that should be enough warning.

Your body is broken, slowly mending- but broken nonetheless. You can feel your bones shifting as they fuse back together, and you gasp out at the pain. You have no idea how you got here, or why you’re in so much agony.

You’re on a metal table in a room with crooked IV poles and bars for windows. Sunlight streams in between the bars and it makes you wince, your pounding headache bothering you.

You slide off the table and limp to the door. It’s open by just a hair, and you push it the rest of the way. You gasp at the sight of bodies life reed on the ground, bodies slick with blood.

You shuffle over to someone, raising shaking hands to check for any signs of life. You move from person to person, but nothing. No one’s chest rises, and no one has a pulse.

What happened here?

You’re only faintly aware of a heavy weight at your shoulder blades, but ignore it. You don’t have time to examine your own injuries. 

But still, you collapse near the final body, letting out a cry of defeat. Everything hurts too much, and no one is else is alive. Something terrible occurred to them all- and to you.

Something splashes, and you glance behind you to see a man in a long, black, leather jacket that swirls around his ankles. Some of his black hair falls into his face as he tilts his head at you, mismatched eyes locking in on your face.

“You weren’t here earlier,” he muses to himself before running his tongue over pointed canines. His lips curl up into something resembling a smile, but it’s too menacing for that. “You’re like me, aren’t you?” 

You swallow, mouth suddenly dry. “I’m not.”

His shoulders shake as he laughs. It doesn’t sound humorous. It comes off as crazed.

He catches his breath, gaze flicking over you. “You have wings. You and I are alike. You have wings, and I’m… this.” His arms spread wide, revealing silver chains dangling from the inside of his coat and a set of handcuffs.

You frown, but do look. And damn, you do have wings. You flex them absently before returning your attention to the man.

“I’m Chan,” he tells you. Someone that you hadn’t checked for life stirs, and he kicks their abdomen. They groan weakly, and he crouches down next to them, holding eye contact with you as he snaps their neck.

You cover your mouth with your hands, horrified. He’s the one who murdered all these people. 

Chan’s gaze is hooded as he stands, studying you for a moment. “You and I… We’re different.”

You shudder, still staring at the person he just killed. Did they have a family? Did they deserve this?

Chan holds his hand out, smiling softly. “Ready to go?”

You take a wary step back. “Go? Go where?”

His easy expression falters before he pastes it back on. “With me. Outside of this place. To the world outside.”

Outside of the dim hallways and broken concrete. Away from the bodies crumpled across the floor, with gaping mouths and empty eyes.

“No,” you say, surprising even yourself. You bring your wings around yourself in a sort of protective shield. “I- I’m not going with you.”

Chan’s outstretched hand curls, fingers digging into the palm of his hand. His shining black shoes take another step closer to you. “Careful… I’m in a good mood.”

You sob, feathers fluttering anxiously. If this is his good mood, killing all of these people, then what is considered bad? What’s he like when he snaps?

“Don’t… Please,” you weakly say, shivering in fear when he continues to approach you. “No-“

His hand wraps around your jaw, tipping your head back. Chan pats your cheek before ripping into his wrist with his teeth, black goo oozing out. “Open wide…”

Tears stream from your eyes and you clamp your mouth shut. He doesn’t like that, and squeezes tighter. A thumb pokes at your lips and forces its way in, quickly followed by two digits.

Chan spreads your lips apart and drips the black goo into your mouth, grinning maniacally as you gasp and splutter on it. “Swallow it like a good girl. There you go.”

You have no choice but to swallow. You choke it down and slowly lower yourself to the ground, balancing on your hands and knees. The taste of it is still in your mouth, making you gag on the bitterness.

Chan’s foot lands on the space between your splayed out wings, applying a steady pressure. Your arms shake until they give out, and you fall to the ground. Chan presses harder, resting his forearm on his bent knee. 

“There you go,“ he croons. “Just give in. Relent.”

You struggle one last time, attempting to stand up. But you cannot with the strength he is using to keep you down.

You let out one last pathetic whimper before going completely limp. Chan removes his foot and crouches next to you, stroking your hair.

Then you’re unconscious, fading into a realm of darkness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You awaken, stretching out. There’s a lingering taste in your mouth, and you scrape your tongue over your teeth in an attempt to remove it. You sigh heavily, getting rid of the remnants of sleep.

You sit up as your memories come back. Of then metal table and extreme pain. Of the lifeless bodies, blood mixing with tears.

And of Chan.

You grip the sheets of the bed you’re in, pulling them around your form. There’s a set of clothes sitting on the edge of the bed, stacked neatly atop each other. You reach for them warily.

You don’t exactly want to use whatever it is Chan has provided you with, but you despise the ripped and torn fabric you wear. So you throw it on, looking around the bedroom you’re in.

It’s scarcely furnished, with a bed covered in pillows, and a desk off to the side. There are two doors, and when you push one open, it leads to a bathroom. You wander to the second, heart pounding as you turn the handle.

There’s another hallway, and you’re overcome by a sense of deja vu. Except this hallway is covered in polished marble that gleams. You pad softly down the corridor, wings dragging behind you.

Maybe there’s something around that you could use as a weapon. Something to defend yourself from Chan with.

You enter a living room, and find it empty. No Chan.

You feel a grumble in your stomach but push your hunger aside. Escape is your top priority, and you want to get as far away from this sick bastard as possible. Ignoring the kitchen, you head straight to the only other door.

But it opens before you have the chance to touch the handle, and you’re met with the sight of a blonde man with long hair. His freckles scrunch up in alarm when he sees you, and he darts back out the door. You lunge for the door, but now it’s locked.

You hammer your fists against it. “Let me out! Please! Before- Before he comes back!”

You’re met with silence. There’s no response, and you slump against the door.

“Please,” you beg one last time. “Just… Just let me out!” When there’s still no answer, you turn and head for the kitchen, intent on locating a knife.

You hiss out a breath as your wings hit the edge of a counter, drawing them closer to yourself. It’s like your body isn’t quite aware of itself. It’s a strange feeling.

“A little birdie told me that my guest is awake,” Chan sings as he enters, slamming the door shut behind him. His eyes land on you and his shoulder shake with laughter at his own joke. “So it’s true. Felix wasn’t lying.”

You haven’t yet found a knife, so you open drawers at a furious pace. Chan simply watches you, fingers laced together behind his back. When you do pull a knife out, he wraps his fingers around your wrist and squeezes, loosening your grip.

“None of that,” Chan chides, kicking the blade away with a clatter.  “I don’t want to have to send you to your room again, so behave.”

You fight back, flapping your wings out in an attempt to throw him off. But he holds on, grasping tightly to your wrist with a patient smile. You let out a yelp as his fingers encircled around your wrist clasp harder, causing something to audibly pop.

“Oh, no,” Chan says, releasing you. He bends at the waist to take a closer look at you as you huddle on the ground, clutching your wrist. “Did you get hurt?”

You whimper and try to crawl away further, but he hooks his ankle around your calf and yanks you closer. He tsks and peers down at your wrist. 

“I can fix that,” Chan murmurs, hovering over you. He smiles, flashing his fangs. “Would you let me touch you to fix it?”

You tremble, shaking your head. “N- No! Just g- go away!” 

“No?” Chan sharply demands. His tongue rolls against the inside of his cheek, forcing out a strained laugh. “No? Did you say no to me?”

You stand and lunge around him, but he grabs you by the back of your neck, squeezing firmly. You go limp when you remember the way he so easily snapped someone’s neck. Your wings slump and your body shakes in terror.

“Oh,” Chan softly says. He slowly lowers you and presses his knee to the small of your back, applying enough pressure that you can’t get up. “Are you scared?”

You hide your face with one of your hands since you can’t move the other, bottom lip wobbling. Was he not aware that he terrified you? Did he not know how much he scared you?

“Don’t be like that,” Chan coos, reaching to the side. He pulls a roll of bandages out from somewhere and wraps it around your injured wrist, humming to himself. “Why would I hurt you? You’re like me, and not like those motherfuckers that did this to us!”

You watch as he treats your injury, sniffling. “W- Who?”

Chan cocks his head, tonguing one of his long canines. “The ones behind the experiments. The pain and the torture so they could mutilate our bodies and turn us into these. But don’t worry, darling. I killed them all. Or, almost all.”

You let out a cry as his knee digs into you further. He’s too distracted by his ramblings to even notice the pain he’s causing you, lips twisting into a sneer. You scramble to tap his thigh, signalling that it’s too much, not that you think he’d care.

“Oh, did I hurt you?” Chan picks you up from beneath the armpits, arms looped under yours. He drags you to the couch, sitting down. He places you on his lap and wraps his arms around your waist.

You’re tired. Tired of all of your memories being of blood and death and fighting. So you give in, and slump against him.

“There you go,” Chan whispers, shifting you so you’re flush against him. He trails his fingers along the feathers of your wings, and it feels wrong and right at the same time.

Wrong in the sense that it’s Chan. The murderer, who’s touching what you’re now learning is such a sensitive part of your body.

Right in the sense that it’s Chan. In some inexplicable way, this feels perfect.

A door creaks open, and a muscular man steps inside. He ducks his head out of respect, avoiding eye contact. “Sir.”

Chan scowls, baring his teeth as his grip on you tightens. “What is it, Changbin”

“We, found him.“ Changbin’s eyes flick to you, a hint of pity showing. “We left him alone for now, but we followed your instructions.”

Chan relaxes, beginning to toy with your hair. He seems to consider everything for a minute before he glances up at Changbin again. “Bring me a hairbrush.”

“Sir?” Changbin questions. As soon as Chan’s eyes narrow, the man bolts out of the room. 

“Chan,” you unsurely say. “Who are these people? Felix and Changbin?”

“They work for me,” Chan says simply. “I’m better and more evolved than them, and they know it.”

So he’s threatening them. 

Changbin returns, handing Chan a brush. He stands there for a moment before he’s dismissed, locking the door again when he leaves.

“Darling,” Chan sings, his voice carrying a teasing lilt. “Stay still.”

He runs the brush through your hair, his free hand cupping the back of your head in a gentle caress. It’s… nice, being cared for this way. You could almost see yourself letting this be a common occurrence.

Almost.

“Do you remember it?” Chan asks as he works. You try to think of what he’s talking about, but there’s no need for it when he continues to talk. “I do. I remember every moment of it.”

You turn your head to look at his face, but he steers your gaze away so he can brush your hair out. You fidget with your hands in your lap, listening to his voice.

“It hurt,” Chan says, voice cracking at the end. “I don’t know what they did to me, but now… Now I’m this. You’re scared of me since I’m a monster, and it’s all their fault!”

You flinch when he raises his voice, and he notices.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Chan nuzzles at the back of your neck, nose digging into your skin. “But you don’t have to worry about that anymore. You’ve been through what I have, and now I’ll keep you safe.”

“Did they- You said you killed them all.” You stare down at the ground, mind reeling with everything. “Isn’t that enough? Isn’t your revenge complete?”

Chan huffs out a laugh, hands falling down to your waist. The hairbrush is placed off to the side as Chan just holds you. “No. It’s not enough. It won’t be enough until I find the one in charge and make him suffer like I did.”

You try so stand, but he prevents you from doing so by tugging you back down to him. You somehow aren’t alarmed by this, and settle down again. You straddle his lap, hands on his shoulders.

“There you go,” Chan praises, thumbing at your bottom lip. His fingers seem to shake before he drops his arm to his side again. “I’m not only doing this for me, but for you. You’ll be safe once he’s dead.”

You rest your head on his shoulder, oddly comforted by his words. Maybe it’s because he’s one of the only people you’ve known since you’ve woken. Maybe you’re as fucked up as he is.

“We’ll go tomorrow,” Chan tells you, letting his head loll back. His eyes flutter shut and he sighs heavily. “Go to your room, darling.”

You lick your lips nervously. “No.”

He peeks an eye open in confusion. “No?”

“I- I don’t want you to kill him.” You squirm, afraid of how he might react. There’s a fairly large chance he’ll remove whatever special treatment you get. 

“Why?” Chan asks, voice dangerously low. He tries to sit up properly, but your weight on his lap keeps him down. “After what that motherfucker did to me? Did to us?”

“Chan-“

“No.” He stands, throwing you off of him. His lips are curled downwards in displeasure and he wraps his hand around your injured wrist, using it to drag you down the hallways.

You yelp at the pain, tears stinging at the corners of your eyes. It hurts, but you know that’s the point. You’ve pissed him off, and there’s a possibility you won’t ever change that.

Chan tosses you into the room you woke up in, lingering in the doorway. “Sleep. I’m bringing you with me tomorrow, even if I have to tie you up and throw you over my shoulder.”

You stand and glare at him as strongly as you can, even though he doesn’t seem intimidated by you. “I don’t want this! I don’t want to see anymore death! Stop the bloodshed, Chan!”

“You’re lucky that you’ve forgotten!” Chan screams. His chest heaves with the exertion of his breakdown, and he slumps to the floor. He covers his face with his hands and his shoulders shake.

He’s… crying.

You swallow unsurely, crouching next to him. You bring your wings around him in a comforting bubble, but you don’t know why. 

“It’s okay,” you murmur before you catch yourself. You stroke his hair, and he wraps his arms around you.

“I- I remember it all,” he whispers, squeezing his eyes shut. When you ask if he wants to talk about it, he shakes his head.

He falls asleep in your arms, exhausted from whatever had been haunting him. You gently roll him to his stomach, lying next to him with your wings splayed out over him as you drift off to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Darling.” Chan’s voice breaks through your slumber, and you shift as you wake. His hand is stroking your face with a gentle touch. “It’s time to get up.”

You ache from sleeping on the floor all night, but Chan looks well-rested. His smile is soft as he gazes at you, kneeling next to you.

“What are we-“ You remember what’s in store for the day and sit up. “No! No, I won’t go!”

Chan’s expression hardens, a flicker of disappointment flashing across his features. He reaches for the handcuffs clipped to his wrist, shaking his head. “I didn’t want to do this. I thought you had finally understood why I’m doing all this.”

You scramble away, only for him to pin you. Your upper portion is bend over the bed, while his body presses against your lower half. You whimper as he secures the handcuffs to you, fighting the urge to cry.

“I’m doing this for us.” Chan runs his fingers over your feathers and you shiver at the sensation. “You’ll be safe with him gone.”

A man hovers in the corner, bottom lip a bright red from worrying it so much with his teeth. “Sir, the car is ready.”

“Leave us, Jisung.” Chan doesn’t bother to glance over as he tightens your restraints. He lets out a snarl of frustration when you fight back. “Stop that! I’m helping!”

“Chan!” you exclaim. “I need you to realize that this isn’t helping! You’re trying to keep me safe as therapy for yourself!”

Chan wrenches you to your feet. “You’ll understand. Just wait.”

You sit in the back of a car, Chan seated next to you as a driver takes you to the location of a man about to be killed. Chan’s hand rests on your thigh, more of a reassurance to himself than a move on you. You stare out the window at the rapidly changing landscape, mind racing.

Chan helps you out of the car, lifting you by the waist and setting you down carefully. You shoot a desperate look to Jisung, who turns away.

Chan’s fingers flex on the cane he’s holding, tipping his head to you. “Shall we?”

You gaze at the building with apprehension. It doesn’t seem like much, being filthy and nearly torn-down, but Changbin had assured Chan that the man was here. You are about to see the one behind Chan’s gruesome past, and the events that led to you being kidnapped by him.

Chan gives you a nudge, clicking his tongue. “Move.”

You enter first, closely followed by Chan. You can hear the ominous tapping of his cane through the pounding of your heart in your ears. You’re terrified, both for yourself and the man.

A dull thud echoes from somewhere, causing you to freeze. Chan chuckles lowly, stepping past you. “Ready, darling?”

“Please,” you beg one last time. “Don’t do this.”

Chan ignores you and presses further into the building. You reluctantly trail behind him, stomach tumbling with nerves.

A man in a lab coat spins around, gasping when he spots the pit of you. He blanches as he catches sight of Chan, horror swimming in his eyes.

“Hello,” Chan simply greets. He tilts his head, pupils dilating as he locks in on his prey. 

“You!” he gasps again, covering his mouth. “You- You weren’t supposed to get out!”

“Because you knew I would come for you?” Chan slithers closer, hands clasped behind his back. The cane dangles from his grip. “Why would you be scared? Do you have something to confess?”

“Chan,” you weakly say.

“I- I’m sorry!” The man in the lab coat sweats profusely, wringing his hands. “But it was for science! Surely- Surely you understand that?”

“Surely I understand what?” Chan arches an eyebrow. “That my suffering was interesting to you?”

The man lowers himself to his knees. “Please… But look at yourself! It’s- It’s magnificent!”

Chan falters, forehead creasing. “Magnificent? You- I cried myself to sleep every night that I was strapped to that table! You personally stood over me and laughed!”

You no longer feel pity for this man. Every ounce of sympathy in your heart for him has dried up, replaced for the same longing for vengeance that Chan craves.

“But- But-“ The man looks to you, scrambling closer on his knees. “You! You were always so perfect! You were the perfect specimen! So sweet and lovely!”

Chan kicks the man away from you, disgust etched into his features. “Get the fuck away from her. You don’t deserve to breathe the same air as her, you vile creature.”

The man sobs, clutching at his hair. He tugs at the strands, taking another attempt at getting closer to you. “Please! Don’t let him do this!” He grabs at you, fingers snagging at your shirt.

You flinch away from him, wings twitching. That seems to do it for Chan, causing him to snap.

Chan swings the cane, hitting the man in the chest. He bends over, blood spurting out of his mouth when he coughs. 

Chan smiles and laughs as he repeatedly beats the man, and you watch. You watch as he’s brought closer and closer to the brink of death, and until his teeth are stained red with blood. His breaths are ragged and his face is streaked with tears.

“That is nowhere near the fraction of the suffering I have gone through,” Chan hisses out. He pinches the man’s chin between his fingers, glowering at him in pure fury. “But I will end you now.”

“Chan,” you softly say, drawing his attention to you. “Chan, my love.”

Chan immediately drops the man, and he goes limp on the ground. He rushes to you, eyes filled with a mix of apprehension and hope. “Yes, darling?”

“Can I do it?” you rasp. You can’t tear your eyes from the man, his once perfectly clean lab coat now splattered with red. “I know you’ve waited for this moment, but-“

“Of course.” Chan pulls a knife out from somewhere, flipping the handle to you. He removes your handcuffs as well. “You’ve suffered as much as I, my darling.”

You kneel next to the man, whose pained expression contorts into one of desperation.  But that quickly changes when you sink the blade into him, over and over again.

You feel the warm wetness on your face and your hands, and you feel the weight of Chan’s gaze on you. You are the one to take this man’s pathetic life, and you are the one to drop the knife to a clatter.

But Chan is the one to initiate the kiss, clasping your face with his hands. It’s full of longing and built up desire. 

You return it with as much enthusiasm, opening your mouth for his tongue. His fangs knick your lip, but you’re covered in so much blood anyways.

“Here?” Chan pants out, groping at any inch of you that he can touch. “Do you want me to fuck you right here?”

You whine and bare your throat for him, eyes fluttering as he kisses up your neck. “I- No.”

“No?” Chan pulls away, tongue wetting his lips. “Darling-“

“Not here.” You yank him back to you. “I- I want a bed, because we’re doing this a bunch tonight.”

He moans at the prospect, kneading at your hips. “Can I- Can I bite you? Make you mine?”

“Sure,” you breathlessly agree. “Make me yours.”

You shriek as his fangs plunge into your neck, right where he had been kissing earlier. It’s a burning hot pain, but it slowly transforms into molten pleasure.

“You like that?” Chan licks a stripe over the wound, closing it up somehow. When you moan as an answer, he scoops you up into his arms and carries you out to the waiting car.

“Sir?” Jisung tenses in alarm.

“Drive,” Chan orders, laying you out across the backseats. You’re dripping now, and he can’t wait to ruin you. 

Jisung wordlessly obeys, and you’re back home before you know it. Chan dumps you onto your bed, wandering to the attached bathroom while you writhe, fuelled by an aching need.

“I know,” Chan soothes as he returns, bringing you with him to the bathroom, where the tub is filling with steaming water. “The bite is making you needy, isn’t it?”

“Y- Yeah.” You nod as he strips you of your clothes, quickly following suit. You both climb into the bathtub together and rinse away the blood and the grime. 

You keep attempting to slide onto Chan’s dick, but he stops you each and every time. He merely kisses you again, assuring you that it’s coming. You’re growing frustrated and as soon as he steps out of the bathtub, you launch yourself at him.

You straddle his chest, bending down to kiss him. You’re both slick with water and droplets of it roll down Chan’s abs as he stands, pushing you off.

“Darling,” Chan taunts, gaze hooded. “Careful, or I’ll have to restrain you again.”

You ignore the warning and shove him again. Chan lets himself fall onto the bed, arms spread out. You’re instantly atop him again, using your wings as balance so he can’t throw you off again.

“Gonna fuck me?” Chan croons. He flicks one of your nipples before circling it with his thumb. “Well, get to it already.”

“I’m trying!” you hiss, grabbing his hard and leaking cock. His head is thrown back when you drag your hands up it. 

You marvel in how much control you have over him in this moment. You had been so afraid of him and what he could do, but now here you are. You’re touching one of his most intimate places, about to have him fuck you.

You get distracted by your thoughts, which allows him to flip you. You fight in protest as the handcuffs return to your wrists, but he smirks down at you.

Chan rubs two fingers through your folds, pupils dilating again at what he finds. “Oh, you’re soaked.” 

You try to grind down on his hand, but he removes it. You struggle in the handcuffs, glaring down at the metal.

“Aw, poor thing.” Chan tilts your chin up with his fingers, shuffling on his knees to straddle you. “Do you need it? Do you need my thick cock to fill you?”

“Need it!” You nod eagerly, scrambling to grab his arm. It’s a tricky maneuver with your hands bound, but you make it work. “Please, Chan!”

Chan stares down at you, seemingly considering something. “You want to be mine? Forever?”

“Forever!” You wrap your legs around him and tug him closer. You want him as close as it gets, so much so that you can’t explain the need that has overcome you.

Chan’s fangs appear to lengthen as he moves them to his forearm. More of the black goo bubbles up and he tips it back into his mouth. You know what he wants and part your lips, sticking your tongue out.

He cups your face with two hands, drooling it out into your waiting mouth. This time you don’t gag, effortlessly swallowing it down.

“Good,” Chan says, lips still stained black. He sticks three fingers past your lips suddenly, making you choke. He checks that you’ve truly swallowed it all, smiling at you. “Ready for it?”

“Uh-huh.” You stare at his cock, and know it will stretch you out. But the bite he had given you has gotten rid of the need for prep. You’re wetter than he could have imagined, and you can feel your pussy throbbing.

Chan likes himself with your entrance, slowly pushing in. Your back arches at the sensation of him filling you, and he kisses you again. It’s messy and sloppy because you’re both panting, but you want more.

“There you go,” Chan softly says as he begins to rock into you. He turns you onto your stomach, with your hands behind your back. “Finally mine. All that fighting for nothing, huh? Don’t you feel stupid now?”

He thrusts into you harshly, and your entire body shifts with the movement. You moan and try once again to get out of the handcuffs.

“Enough,” Chan scolds, smacking your ass. You yelp, and he rubs the pain away by smoothing his hands over where he had just hit.

“Chan!” Your eyes roll back at a particularly well-aimed thrust. “Please! Please, please, please!”

“Please what?” Chan taunts. He presses your clit firmly and you squirm away from the pleasure. But he uses his other hand to grip the handcuffs and pull you back to him. “I’m already giving you my dick, you needy thing. Are you asking me to fill you further? To fill you with my cum until it’s dripping out of you, and then fuck it back in?”

You drool onto the sheets, aching and burning and full. You swear that he’s rearranging your guts for his own pleasure. You never want it to stop.

Then you’re clenching down around him with an orgasm, cunt spasming and body trembling. He works you through it by grinding into you, toying with your clit.

“Gonna give it to you,” Chan gasps out, mouth parting as he cums inside you. It’s your turn to help him through it, and you push back against him, rolling your hips.

“We’re the same,” Chan whispers as he slips out of you. He pulls you flush to his chest, arms around your torso. “You’re mine and I’m yours. You and I will be safe, now.”

Taglist:

@velvetmoonlght @jinnie-ret @hansmic @imeverycliche @iwuberic @strawberryscentedd @lezleeferguson-120 @mbioooo0000

[littlelamy]

title: he catches you at a party

warnings: 18+, language, angst, part 1 part 2 part 3

you down another shot, the burn sharp on your tongue, making you a little tipsy. jj’s eyes glint under the pink and red haze, cocky and amused as he watches you. he swipes his tongue over his lip, chasing a stray drop of tequila.

“damn, princess....almost forgot you know how to have fun.”

you roll your eyes but take his hand anyway, pulling him onto the dance floor. it’s messy, probably but exactly what you need. his grip tightens on your hips, drawing you against him, moving in sync like this isn’t the first time. his breath is hot at your ear, saying something really dirty, but you don’t hear it—

because the air shifts.

you feel it before you see it, that heavy weight settling over you, pinning you in place.

rafe.

you don’t stop. if anything, you press closer to jj, tilting your head back just enough to let him mouth at your neck, let his fingers dig in a little harder. let rafe watch.

and he does. for about three seconds before all hell breaks loose.

one minute, jj’s laughing against your skin, the next he’s on the floor, lip split open, blinking up at the ceiling with wide, shocked eyes. it happens so fast you barely register rafe’s fist still clenched, his chest heaving, his face twisted in pure rage. he doesn’t even glance at jj before his hand is wrapping around your wrist, yanking you toward the exit.

“what the fuck, rafe?” you spit, struggling against his grip, but he doesn’t let go, dragging you outside and into the cool night air.

he shoves a hand through his hair, exhaling sharply. “what the fuck are you doing?”

“what the fuck am i doing?” you laugh, shaking your head. “i should be asking you that! you lost your damn mind?”

his jaw clenches, muscles jumping as he swallows hard. “weeks, baby. weeks away from you, and i—I don’t know how to fucking breathe without you.” his voice cracks on the last word, something raw in his eyes. “i was a complete fucking idiot. i fucked up. i don’t deserve you, i know that. and if you never want me again, i—”

the bitch starts crying.

actual tears glisten in his stormy blue eyes, his hands twitching like he wants to reach for you but knows he can’t. “but i can’t stand seeing you with him. with anyone that isn’t me.”

something in your chest squeezes, but you shove it down, clenching your fists at your sides. “good.” and then, before he can say another word or sink his claws into you again—

smack.

his head snaps to the side, jaw tightening, a slow exhale leaving his lips as he blinks hard. you’re breathing heavy, nostrils flaring, fists still clenched at your sides. then—

you grab his face, fingers pressing into his jaw as you yank him forward, slamming your mouth against his.

it’s fire, it’s so so wrong and it’s everything you swore you wouldn’t do, but fuck it. for a second, just a second, you let yourself drown in it—the way his lips part for you, the way his hands instinctively find your waist, the way he whimpers into your mouth like he’s starving for you.

you pull back and slap him again, harder this time.

his eyes snap open, breath ragged, lips swollen, with a dazed, hungry look on his face.

“stay the fuck away from me,” you spit, turning on your heel, walking back inside without another glance.

rafe just stands there, jaw ticking, watching you disappear into the crowd, already thinking of how the fuck he’s going to get you back.

tags (lmk if you want to be removed): @rafesbabygirlx @namelesslosers @drewsephrry @maybanksangel @averyoceanblvd @iknowdatsrightbih @rafesheaven @anamiad00msday @ivysprophecy @wearemadeofstardust0 @rafesangelita @rafedaddy01 @bakugouswaif @skywalker0809 @vanessa-rafesgirl @evermorx89 @outerhills @ditzyzombiesblog @slavicangelmuah @alivinggirl @rafesgreasycurtainbangs @lil-sparklqueen @rafessweetgirl @esquivelbianca @p45510n4f4shi0n @palomavz @cokewithcameron @donaldsonsgirl @yncoded @lilbunnysfics @solaceluna @icaqttt @alphabetically-deranged @bevstofu @wintercrows

[maeintree]

baby, oh baby. | j. miller

some blurby angst coz i've been so busy lately. i'm so sorry my loves!

tags: established relationship, death, graphic description of wounds, joel miller being a sad old fuck, dialogue is heavily inspired from when sarah died :(

you, ellie, and joel had barely made it out of k.c., the horror of sam and henry still fresh in your minds. there was no time to grieve, no time to rest. you just had to keep moving, get closer to wyoming, push forward—because stopping obviously meant dying.

unfortunately, raiders didn’t care about those plans.

the ambush came out of nowhere. a bullet shattered the windshield of an old ford truck joel managed to have hotwired. then came gunfire. you barely had time to react before you were running—through the trees, through the dark, through the biting wind—until the sharp, searing pain in your stomach stopped you cold.

you didn’t even realize you’d been stabbed at first. not until you looked down and saw the knife buried hilt-deep in your gut. not until the raider sneered and twisted the blade, making your knees buckle, your breath hitch in a strangled gasp.

and then joel was there.

a gunshot. the raider dropped.

you drop to your knees, a sharp gasp tearing from your throat as pain rips through you. your hand instinctively clamps over your stomach, but it does nothing to stop the blood—warm, thick, spilling through your fingers in heavy pulses.

oh, god.

you can feel it—your strength draining away, your body growing weaker by the second. how could someone lose so much in mere moments? how could you go from running, breathing, living—to this?

your vision blurs. the trees sway. the cold bites at your skin.

and then—

“j-joel…” your voice is barely a whisper, but it’s enough.

his footsteps thunder toward you, fast, desperate. he’s on you in seconds, dropping to his knees, tossing his rifle aside as his hands find you.

“fuck—fuck—you’re okay, you’re okay, i got you,” he mutters, but there’s panic in his voice, raw and unsteady. his hands press against the wound, but it only makes you whimper, your body jerking as fresh pain shoots through you.

joel flinches. “shit, i-i know, i know, baby, i know—just hold on, okay?”

you try to breathe, but every inhale feels like fire licking through your ribs. you let out a shaky, bitter laugh, gripping onto his arms, fingers digging in as the agony becomes unbearable.

“the movies—” you choke out, a joke beginning to come out, your breath hitching, “—they don’t make it seem… t-this painful…”

joel swallows thickly, his face twisting. “i know, baby, i know, but you gotta—you gotta hold on—”

a fresh wave of blood gushes out, warm and relentless, coating his hands.

“no—no, no, no, you’re losing too much—shit—fuck—ELLIE!” his voice cracks as he screams for her, for anyone, for help that isn’t coming fast enough.

his hands—warm, rough, shaking—pressed against your stomach, trying, failing, to keep everything inside. but there was too much. too much blood, spilling between his fingers, soaking through the layers of your clothes, pooling beneath you. it was thick, warm at first, but cooling too fast.

joel was muttering, barely coherent. his breath came in short, ragged gasps, his words tumbling out in panicked desperation.

“shh—shit, shit, shit—no, nonononono, baby, look at me—l-look at me, keep your eyes open, d-don’t—don’t you fuckin’ close ‘em, okay?”

you tried. you really did. but it was hard. everything was fading—blurring at the edges, the sounds, the sights, the pain all dulling like you were sinking underwater.

joel’s hands pressed harder. you choked on a gasp as the pain flared, white-hot, deep in your gut. you could feel it—could feel the way your insides weren’t right anymore, the sick, awful way something inside you had ripped.

joel knew it, too.

his breathing hitched. “no, no, no, baby, d-don’t—don’t go quiet on me. i-i’m gonna fix this, i—fuck, i just—” his voice cracked, raw and broken. “ellie’s comin’ back with help, you just gotta hold on a little longer, okay? j-just—fuckin’ hold on—WHERE THE FUCK IS ELLIE?”

you wanted to tell him it was okay. that he didn’t have to lie.

but when you tried to speak, all that came out was a wet, gurgling cough. something warm trickled from the corner of your lips—coppery, thick. joel flinched like you’d shot him, his grip on you tightening.

“hey, hey, hey—breathe, baby, breathe—c’mon, stay with me, s-stay with me, please—”

his voice was shaking. joel miller—who never fucking stuttered, never lost his composure, never let anyone see him break—was unraveling right in front of you. his face was streaked with dirt, with sweat, his eyes blown wide, wild, terrified.

he was crying. joel miller doesn't cry. he wasn't like this when tess died.

“i-i can’t—” your voice was barely there, strangled by the blood rising in your throat.

joel made a sound—half a sob, half a curse. he pressed his forehead against yours, his breath hot and frantic against your skin.

“you can. you can, baby, please—please, don’t do this to me.” his voice was hoarse, crumbling under the weight of something too heavy to bear. “i c-can’t—i can’t lose you, i c-can’t—”

his hands were trembling. they weren’t supposed to do that. joel’s hands were supposed to be steady, strong, unshakable. but now they were gripping you like they were the only thing keeping him from falling apart completely.

you tried to lift a hand—to touch him, to wipe away the tears staining his face—but your arm wouldn’t move. it was too heavy. everything was too heavy.

“i love you,” you whispered, lips barely forming the words.

joel let out a broken, wrecked sound, pressing a desperate, shaking kiss against your temple, your hair, anywhere he could reach.

“i love you—i love you so goddamn much, baby, please don’t go, please—”

and then—nothing.

this seems a little too ooc for joel, but i'd like to think reader meant a whole lot to him. sorry for being gone for a whilee <3

[starstruckbich]

chloe eats you out⋆｡°✩

summary: chloe is high and she just wants to eat you out in your jacuzzi ⋆｡°✩

tags: 18+ mdni men dni smut, tongue fucking, tribbing (r! receiving)

note: haven´t been writing much because yknow life, im a little sick. anyway i just had to write about the og blue haired baddie. this isnt proof read. enjoy.

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"I can't believe you have a fucking jacuzzi in your house and your parents don't even use it." Chloe comes out in her bikini, joining you in the water.

She groans lowly, coming up to hug you from behind, as clingy as always. Of course, you have to sneak in a dirty comment.

"Head in here would go crazy."

Chloe gives you a kiss to shut you up, rubbing your left arm. "don't start princess, your parents are inside."

"they'll be out soon though..." you grumble. You have to be honest, you're very needy yourself.

"we have the house to ourselves?"

"yeah, so in a few minutes we can start."

"and do what, exactly?" she raises her eyebrow, a grin on her face.

"get high and fuck."

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"chloe! fuckkk!!"

As soon as your parents went out that door, Chloe is lapping at your cunt, so good that you think you're seeing god himself. And you know how she is when she's high. A fucking beast.

"mhh..." she hums agaisnt your pussy, the vibrations going through your body and making you even more crazy. She has a vice grip on your thighs, looking up at you as she eats you out like you're her last meal.

"oh my god, fuck fuck fuck!!" you moan, turning your head away from the sight because you know you won't be able to last long, only to see your bottom bikini part thrown off to the side, reminding you of the position you're in and heightening your arousal.

you're so fucking wet it's embarassing. maybe Chloe is right when she calls you filthy, but it's not like she isn't enjoying herself either, pupils dilated, eyes red, eating away at your cunt.

she kisses, laps, sucks, slaps at your clit, only to please that wet puffy pussy of yours, fucking you with her tongue.

"yeah... ohh fuckk..." you groan, taking another drag at your joint and gripping onto her hair for dear life.

you rock your hips, desperate to feel her tongue deeper inside you, earning a laugh from her.

"that good baby? yeah? you like seeing me eat this pretty pussy princess? look at me."

and you would be crazy not to, looking down to see the head lock you've got her in.

"good girl." she taunts, making your back arch. why does she always have to tease right where it sounds good!

"fuckk, chloe..." you whimper, feeling so hazy that your start to lay down on the edge of the pool, squirming away. when you're suddenly interrupted.

"i dont fucking think so." she groans, gripping your hips, the pain turning into pleasure.

"i cant! i cant! fuck chloe! im too sensitive"

"you say that like its a bad thing." she groans, continuing to please your insides so good that you wonder how her tongue does things like that.

"baby im coming, gonna come!! gonna come on your tongue!" you whimper, only for Chloe to stop completly. "no no! please! what are you-!"

Chloe comes up to you, giving you a tongue kiss just to shut you up, making you feel your own taste. your hips twitch, your body seeking her, but she's not letting you make friction, or breathe really.

she pulls you to her thigh, taking her own bikini off.

"fuck chloe, please, i need you baby.." you hold her face, tearing up, eyes red and rolling to the back of your head over nothing.

"aw you're so sentive."

"quit fucking around!" you say, already overstimulated out of your mind.

"i think fucking around is exactly what you want me to do."

She teases, and soon enough, your cunts are rubbing together, and you feel that sweet sweet friction agaisnt your clit again.

"mh, yeah..." you bite your lip. you've reached that point that you're so high that everything turns you on, your head lolling to the side.

"fuck, ohh..." Chloe groans, huffing agaisnt your neck, her hand on one of your legs to keep it raised. "you like that princess? god you're like a faucet, look at that, porn worthy..."

you can only whimper, eyes rolling to the back of your head, hips losing the strength to keep grinding when Chloe suddenly throws herself on top of you, your body hitting the stone base around the jacuzzi as you dig your nails onto her back.

"yeah, fuck ,baby i think im gonna come..." Chloe laughs into your ear. "too slippery..."

"cant take it, c-cant...! FUCK FUCK FUCK!" You yell out, your own juices mixing up with Chloe's as you both come, white sticky, hot liquid hiting the stone floor and staining it,

Chloe huffs, laughing.

"tell your parents i love the jacuzzi."

[whosyourmommy69]

Broken Promises pt2

The night air is cold, biting at your skin as you stand outside the door. You hear him shout something, but you don’t look back. You can’t. The weight of everything, his words, his actions, his silence feels like it’s suffocating you, and you need to escape, if only for a moment, to breathe.

You walk down the street, hands shoved deep into the pockets of your jacket, trying to stop the tears that threaten to spill. You’re angry, but it’s a quiet, simmering anger. More than that, you’re heartbroken. Broken in a way that you’re not sure how to fix.

Hours pass before you finally make it back to your apartment, numb from the cold and from the mess of everything. The silence of your place is almost a relief, but at the same time, it feels like the loneliest thing in the world.

And yet, as much as you try to push him out of your thoughts, Rafe keeps creeping into your mind. How could he say something like that to you? How could he not care? The words echo in your head—you think you can just walk away every time you get upset?

The nerve. As if you’ve been the one walking away. As if you’ve been the one who hasn’t shown up.

You’re shaken out of your spiraling thoughts by the sudden buzz of your phone on the table.

You check it. It’s him. Again.

Rafe: “Please just talk to me.” Rafe: “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. You know I didn’t mean it.” Rafe: “Please… I’ll do anything. Just don’t leave me. I don’t know how to do this without you.”

You stare at the screen, your fingers hovering over the keys, unsure of what to say. Part of you wants to respond, wants to hear him apologize the way you know he can—sincere, soft, like the Rafe you used to know. But another part of you knows better.

How many apologies have you heard by now? How many empty words before you stop believing them?

You don’t answer. Instead, you toss your phone aside again, feeling a tightness in your chest. You hate this. You hate how much he still gets to you, how much you still care even when every instinct tells you to let go.

The next morning, you find yourself staring at your phone. Another text. Another call. It’s been hours. Why is he still doing this? Why won’t he just leave you alone?

Rafe: “I’m coming back. I need to talk to you . I swear I’ll make it right.”

The message sends a wave of frustration through you. You want to tell him no, to tell him to leave, but something inside you hesitates. You’re not ready to see him. Not yet.

You sit with your phone, trying to will the feeling of disappointment away, but it lingers, gnawing at your insides. The truth is, you want him to grovel. You want him to really get it this time, to feel the weight of his mistakes the way you’ve been feeling it for weeks.

The doorbell rings.

You know it’s him before you even look through the peephole. You open the door slowly, your heart racing, and there he is, standing on your doorstep, looking like a mess. He’s disheveled, his hair wild, eyes bloodshot and pleading.

"I know I don’t deserve it," he starts, his voice cracking. "I know I’ve hurt you, and I—"

"You don’t deserve anything," you cut him off, the words more bitter than you expect. "You hurt me. Over and over, Rafe. You think showing up now changes any of that?"

He winces at your tone but steps forward, his eyes filled with desperation. "Please," he says softly, his voice barely above a whisper. "I’m sorry. I know I messed up. You’re right. I’ve been selfish, I’ve been a mess, and I’ve taken you for granted. But I can’t lose you. Not like this."

You shake your head, stepping back slightly, trying to keep the distance between you. "You’ve already lost me, Rafe. You’ve been losing me for months."

He flinches as if you’ve slapped him. "No, no I haven’t," he says quickly. "I know I fucked up, okay? But I swear, I’m trying. I’ll do anything. Please just give me a chance."

You feel the tears threaten to rise again, but you push them back. You’re tired of crying over someone who only seems to care when it’s convenient for him.

"I don’t know if I can believe you anymore," you reply, your voice steady, though your heart is pounding. "You always say the right things when you need to. But your actions, Rafe your actions never match."

His face crumbles then, a flicker of guilt flashing across his features. He steps closer, his hand outstretched, but you take a step back, shaking your head. "No," you say firmly. "I’m not doing this again. Not today."

"Please," he begs, his voice rising with urgency now. "I’m sorry. I’ll prove it. I’ll prove I’m not like that. You have to believe me."

You look him dead in the eye, letting the silence stretch between you. You want to forgive him. You really do. But the pain is still too fresh, and the fear that it will all happen again, that he will slip away the moment you let your guard down, is too real.

"You don’t get to tell me how to feel, Rafe," you say quietly. "You don’t get to decide when I forgive you. That’s not how this works."

His shoulders sag with defeat. "What do you want me to do?" His voice cracks, sounding smaller now, more vulnerable. "Tell me what to do, and I’ll do it. Just don’t shut me out."

You look at him for a long moment, the rawness of everything still hanging in the air. You want to reach out, to hold him, to let him fix everything with one last apology. But you can’t. You’re not ready to forget the hurt. Not yet.

"Prove it," you say softly, almost too quietly for him to hear. "And then maybe we can talk. But until then I need space."

He nods slowly, his face a mix of relief and guilt. "Okay. I’ll prove it. I’ll show you. I swear I will."

But as he turns to leave, you feel a pang of doubt. Will he really change? Or is this just another round of empty promises? You don’t know yet, but you know one thing: you’re not going to let him hurt you again. Not so easily.

[buckybarnesisdaddy]

Leave Her Wild pt 1

Summary: Busy morning and first day at the Ranch

Pairings: None official so far! Bucky x Reader, Ari X Reader, original female characters with Sam and Tony.

Warnings: language, drinking, talks of sex, inappropriate acts with guests, talks of being left at the alter & being abandoned, talks of forgetting to eat, overbearing best friend who means well. Probably missed some.

Word count: not gonna say cause then some of you won’t read it. 🤭 It’s long enough!

Dividers by: @firefly-graphics

Masterlist

“You’re just not who I fell in love with. You have no fire, no thoughts of your own. So this wedding is off, I will give you a week to move out of the penthouse. Feel free to take everything I bought you, I know you’ll need the money.” With an icy cold kiss on your forehead he leaves. Your chest feels tight and you can’t catch a breath. Your eyes fill with tears and everything goes black.

The bumping of the uber jolts you awake, the same nightmare as the past 4 months, the stress of the travel must have weighed on you enough to let that slip through… again. You sit up and look around, all your friends are passed out as well, the red eye really did you all dirty but it will be worth it when you see that first Montana Sunrise. It’s slowly peaking over the mountains and painting the sky in bright hues of pink and orange. The uber turns down a long dirt road and brings the ranch into view. It really is stunning, just like the pictures showed. Horses are running over the rolling fields on one side and cattle are grazing in the other. You see two men on horse back that seem to be herding the horses in one direction. The way they move and ride, well let’s just say they look really good. The main house is incredible, with all of the stone work and exposed wood. It’s settled right at the base of the mountain and there is a massive stable and barn next to it. When you were first looking up Dude Ranches you never thought you’d find one like this. The driver stops and turns to you, “We are here Miss. are you going to wake your friends?” You lightly laugh and turn around to shake them awake.

“Hey, wake up. We’re here!” You say before climbing out of the car. Your best friend Natasha wakes up first. She stretches and looks around before shoving your friend Peter off her shoulder.

“Wake up, Pete.” She says not so softly as she climbs over him to open the door and tumble out.

“Ouch! You could have waited!!” Peter shouts as he is stepped all over. Lizzy who was on the other side of the car shoots awake at the yelling.

“Where are we?!” She gasps and then calms down when she sees you. “Oh,” she sighs. “We are finally here?” You hear her climb out and walk towards you.

“Yup,” You take a deep breath and smiles. “And just in time for the sunrise.” You watch as it finally breaks over the mountains, it’s so beautiful you feel tears start to well up. You have to wipe them away before anyone notices. “Okay, you three hang tight, I’m gonna go get us checked in. Amelia, Sam, Tony, and Ransom should be pulling up any minute so keep an eye out!” You shout over your shoulder as you walk to the front door. You knock seeing as it looks to be someone’s actual house but the door is pushed open by your knock and you hear people talking inside, so you slowly walk in to see if you can find the owner.

“For fuck’s sake, Rogers! Barnes! Hurry up and eat, Bazen left the fucking gate open again and all the horses are loose in the east field. Need you two to round ‘em up.” Ari bellows as he stomps down the stairs. Steve nods from where he sits at the bar in the Kitchen. Bucky laughs to himself as he takes the last bite of his breakfast.

“I don’t know why you don’t just fire him, Ari.” Bucky laughs as he squares away his dirty dishes. Steve agrees and goes to grab his jacket from the mud room.

“Because his rich and powerful father wants him here, so he’s here.” Ari sighs, “and you like having a job and a free place to stay, don’t you?” Bucky stays silent, “that’s what I thought, go. We need those horses stabled and resting.” Bucky and Steve head out and Ari calls his thanks over his shoulder as they leave. “Mickey!” Ari yells as he sees the man slouched and laying on the couch, he shoot up at the sound of his name though. “Get up, you need to help Kemp and Jefferson get the guest rooms ready.” Mickey groans and sits up.

“Those freaks? No way, I’d rather help Turner and Jensen shovel the stalls.” Ari sighs and sets his hands on his hips as he looks to the ceiling.

“Then by all means, go do that! Go do something to get this place in order before our guests arrive!” He yells as Mickey jumps to get to work. “And if you see Storm and Collin tell them I need to see ‘em in my office.” Mickey waves over his shoulder as he heads out the back door. Ari grabs his coffee and heads to his office on the first floor of the house, the sun isn’t even up yet and he’s already on his second cup when Johnny and Collin come walking into the room.

“Sup, boss?” Johnny says as he jumps over the back of the arm chair and plops down in it, propping his feet up on Ari’s desk. Ari rolls his eyes and smacks his feet off and then glares at Collin to stop laughing and sit.

“What’s ‘sup’ is, we have a new group coming in today, there is 7 of them so I need you two to move out to the spare bunk room in the barn. We just fixed the heat so it should be good.”

Johnny groans and Collin shakes his head.

“We have to share with Kemp and Jefferson?!” Collin exclaims.

“I’d rather sleep in a tent.” Johnny says flatly. Ari stands up and grabs his empty coffee cup.

“I don’t care where you chose to lay your pretty little head, Johnny,” Johnny looks at Collin and pretends to swoon.

“You hear that? He called me pretty!” Collin laughs and Johnny gives Ari a shit eating grin.

Ari set his mug down, rests his hands on his desk and leans forward.

“Get your shit out of the bedrooms upstairs, now. And then go back and clean them up, they need to be spotless by 7am.” He then stands up straight and leaves his own office and the two grumpy men.

7am rolls around and all the men are gathered in the living room for their morning meeting. “Alright, everyone shut up! We have a lot to cover this morning.” Ari yells over them all and they finally shut up. “Rogers and Barnes are off this morning due to having to clean up Baizen’s mess of the gate last night.”

“I said I was sorry! I was running late for a date.” He smirks and the other guys wolf whistle. Ari pretends to laugh.

“And because of that you’ll need to cancel whatever date you have scheduled for tonight, you’ll have the first watch in the barn.” Carter curses under his breath and Ari just smile. “Kemp, we have a group of 7 checking in today and they will be here for,” he double checks his clipboard and whistles, “shit I forgot this is the extended stay group. They are here till June. So get ready to be on Kitchen duty for the foreseeable future- and for the love of God, STOP with the cannibalism joke!! No one thinks they are funny and in fact we’ve had guest call the police on you because they are actually scared we are feeding them humans, so just stop it or you’re fired.” Kemp rolls his eyes.

“People just can’t take jokes anymore.” He shakes his head and Collin scoffs.

“Dude! You told a lady she was ‘good enough to eat’ and then pretended to bite her! You’re lucky Andy talked her down and swooned her out of pressing charges!” He yells and the other guys back him up. Kemp just shrugs.

“To each their own, but fine I’ll stop.” He raises his hands and Ari thanks him.

“Jefferson? Laundry.” He says shortly and Jefferson just nods. “Mickey and Jensen you are on Milk cows, honey collection, and harvesting duty today. Cole you’re off till this afternoon and you’ll help Rogers and Barnes with getting the cattle moved to the lower field.”

“You got it boss.” Cole says agreeably.

“Okay that just leaves, Johnny, Collin, and Carter, You three are on dog training today. They have their test next week and they need to pass so we can get them sold to the interested Ranches.” Johnny raises his hand and smiles, so Ari knows his question is gonna piss him off.

“What?” He asks, already regretting it.

“So who is this new group and who is showing them around today?” He crosse his arms and then tilts his head as he asks, “And what are you and Andy gonna be doing, boss??” Heavy footsteps are heard coming into the room as if on cue.

“I’m gonna do whatever I damn well please cause this place is half mine and your sorry ass works for me.” Andy smiles. “And if I were you, I’d remember my place more often.” He grabs a mug and pours himself a cup of coffee. Ari laughs and agrees.

“What he said!” Ari gives Johnny that shit eating smile back and Johnny rolls his eyes. “But about our guests, 4 males and 4 females, They should be here soon. They all seem very nice and shouldn’t be too much trouble. But seeing as it is mostly women that make up the group, those of you who are on probation when interacting with guests alone,” he looks at Johnny, Collin, Kemp, and Jefferson, “should remember that probation is the last straw, step out of line again and you’re gone.

“Can we not call it that?” Kemp asks, “cause it sounds like we’ve tried to get rapey with them or something and we haven’t.”

“No you’ve just joke about eating them,” Carter snaps back and gives a ‘wtf’ look to the sky and anyone who was watching him, it earns a few laughs. “And not eating them in the good way.” He teases and Johnny reaches back and they high-five. Kemp flicks his ear and he turns and punches his leg.

“Enough!” Andy shouts. “As the lawyer in the room I feel I should say that even joking like that can still catch you a case, hence the probation.” Ari sighs, this is not how he likes to start his mornings.

“Look, we know you haven’t done anything wrong, you just get weird with the guests.” He gives a sorrowful look to Jefferson who shrugs. “Or you have inappropriate relationships with them while they are here.” He looks at Johnny and Collin.

“I have no idea what you mean,” Collin says nonchalantly and Andy laughs loudly.

“Yeah, your naked ass and some lady pressed up against the side of our barn on our security tapes beg to differ.” Ari points at Andy, confirming the words he took right out of Ari’s mouth.

“Anyway, remember to keep any sexual relation with guests to a minimum, preferably none at all!” A knock on the door interrupts him and then the sound of boots walking on the hardwood make all their heads turn.

“Oh!” You gasp, the amount of handsome men staring back at you makes you blush and you feel a little flustered for a moment. But you catch a breath and just smile as you talk. “I’m so sorry, I knocked and the door opened. Umm I’ll just go wait outside.” You turn to leave and someone calls after you.

“No, come on in!” The guy with a clipboard, hair to be jealous of, and a beard that looks like it would feel so soft to touch, walks closer and extends his hand. “Hi I’m Ari, part owner and this here is Andy the other owner. You must be-” you say your name, knowing he had probably forgotten it since you booked. “Well it is nice to meet you in person, welcome to Mountain Valley Retreat.” His smile is sweet and his hand shake is firm. “Is the rest of your party here?” He asks, looking over your shoulder.

“Oh, yes they are all waiting by the cars.” You explain.

“Well how about you go get them and we can show you to your rooms.” Ari offers. “Then once you all are settled we can give you a little tour.” You agree and turn to head back out to the car to grab your friends and your stuff. But before you do the front door swings open and in steps two men, both dressed in big jackets, jeans, boots, and a cowboy hat to match. The first guy lifts his off and his blonde hair shines in the morning sun. He is handsome, boy next door handsome. The second man shakes off his jacket and hangs it on the rack next to the door and places his hat over it. He turns and meets your gaze, his blue eyes pierce your soul and his brown hair a little longer but not long enough to tie back. He is just as handsome as the first and you are speechless. They are both solid, strong men who have clearly worked day in and day out on a farm.

“Howdy ma’am,” the second man says with a polite nod of his head and a simple smile. The first man finally notices you.

“Oh!” He looks past you to Ari, “you must be our new guest!” He brushes his hand off on his pants. “Nice to meet you, I’m Steve!” You shake his hand and introduce yourself. “This here is-“

“James, but everyone calls me Bucky.” He offers his hand and you shake it, wishing your voice would work to say more than ‘hi’. Ari steps up behind you.

“These two are our best cowboys! Steve rogers and Bucky Barnes. They are gonna be the ones teaching you and your friends about horse riding and the works. But first we need to get you all settled, go ahead out and I’ll send some guys to help with your luggage.” You nod and head out the front door, passing a look to Steve and then Bucky before fully turning around and leaving. It’s quiet for a moment when there is a wolf whistle, Bucky, Steve, and Ari turn around and look at a smirking Johnny.

“So what was that about keeping the sexual relations to a minimum or we will be on probation?? Cause that right there is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. She’s soft and sweet, and mmhmm. Yes!” He teases and shoots a look to Bucky and Ari. Who have both turned back to watch you in the front drive. “And it looks like Barnes along with you, boss are gonna be on the Probation squad soon!” Johnny continues to tease, Bucky doesn’t say a word, just plops his hat back on his head and heads out to your car. Steve sighs and gives Johnny the middle finger before following Bucky. Ari clears his throat and shakes his head and turns to Johnny.

“Shut the hell up and get to work.” He grumbles, Andy walks up to him and pats his shoulder.

“You may have to rethink the probation and firing or you’ll have no one left by May.” Andy lightly laughs and then squeezes his shoulders, “let loose and maybe you’ll find your new pet,” he winks before heading to his office.

You head back to the uber, Natasha notices your flushed face. “Girl you okay?” She asks as she laughs. You shake your head and smile, moving in close you whisper.

“Hot men- and I mean H.O.T men filled that room in there,” you laugh and rub your forehead. “We aren’t going to last the summer.” Natasha smirks and looks over your shoulder.

“Oh well I think one of them is coming over here now.” She teases you. Your eyes widen and you try not to smile.

“Big Blonde, Big Brunette, or Big Hippie?” You ask and she bites her lip.

“Does it matter?” She asks as she looks him up and down, you can hear his boots getting closer and closer.

“Natasha?!” You exclaim

“Big Brunette, really big. Mmhmm” she teases. “Wow I’d like to ride that.” She mumbles and you laugh and give her a shove.

“Get in line.” You quip and turn around right as he arrives. “Oh, Bucky! Hi! This is Natasha.” He spares her a glance and nods his head politely.

“Ma’am,” he says and then looks back to you. “Can I help with any of the bags?” You look behind you and blush, suddenly very self conscious of how many bags you brought.

“Oh umm sure,” you say and he scoots between you and Natasha. He scoops up four different suitcases. Two under each arm and two in his hands. He turns and nods over his shoulder.

“Go ahead and grab your personal bags and follow me.” He smiles, “I’ll show you to your rooms.” He turns and walks towards the house. Natasha leans in and teases.

“Giddy up girl.” She smacks your ass and You laugh. You grab your book bag and purse and follow after Bucky. Steve and another man pass by you two to help grab the other bags. The other man is cute, he has glasses and spiky blonde hair. He looks at you and keeps looking as you keep walking. You giggle and wave before turning back to Bucky. Another man about runs into Bucky as he is walking through the door. He is tall and cute, seems a little clumsy. Steve calls him over.

“Cole! Over here,” Steve waves from the trunk. “Got a few more bags from this car.” He shuffles down the stairs and goes to help Steve. Bucky sets the bags down in the foyer as he talks to Ari.

“The rooms aren’t ready yet,” Ari sighs. “That’s what I get for telling Johnny and Collin to clean up after themselves.” He looks at you and then smiles. “So we are finishing up with the rooms and we will get you all settled soon! How about you set your stuff here and we will do the tour. And hopefully after the rooms will be ready and we will get you moved up there. Sound good?” He asks.

“Oh of course!” You lightly laugh, “I promise Mr. Levinson we are a very chill group. None of this is a problem, I promise!” You assure him. He laughs and looks down at his feet as he blushes.

“Well thank you, and you can just call me Ari.” He says and fidgets with his clipboard.

“Okay, Ari.” You answer sweetly. You glance from Bucky to Ari and then shuffle where you stand. Amelia, Lizzy, and Natasha save the day by walking in, giggling and talking in hushed voices. “Oh these are my friends Amelia,”

“Hi,” she bats her eyelashes at them both. Amelia is a tall brunette with sun-kissed skin that you dream of. She is a reformed party girl who has too many stories about you from college. You laugh.

“Lizzy,” she giggles and cover her mouth as she gives a little wave. Lizzy is a short blonde who was a cheerleader in college and would have married her college boyfriend had he actually ever proposed. You shake your head. “And Natasha,”

“Well hello,” she smirks and leans against you. Natasha is a beautiful redhead with striking green eyes. She’s is the epitome of ‘looks like she could kill you, would kill you.’ She’s also been your best friend since childhood. You blush and wished your friends weren’t horn dogs.

“Anyway, these are my friends and hopefully they won’t be too much trouble this summer.” You laugh and give Natasha a nudge and she just laughs. Ari smirks and looks at each of them.

“Well it’s very nice to meet you all. There were men with your group too, right?” He asks checking his clipboard. Bucky looks at you and you see a little smile in his eyes. Natasha speaks for you.

“Yup! They are getting all their stuff out of the car and dragging it in.” She smirks at you, “and they are just friends, no attachments to the two of us.” She puts her arm around you and you blush, completely mortified. “Only those two are in a relationships,” she points to Lizzy and Amelia, “we are free as birds.” She bites her lip as she looks back behind her to where Steve is lifting two suitcases clear over his head. Ari laughs and you can see the blush spread across his cheeks, Bucky looks you up and down and tries to hide the smile that breaks across his face.

“So about that tour?” You quickly change the subject. Ari clears his throat and tries to get a control on his flushed face. There is a loud commotion behind you on the stairs on the house. Tony, Peter, Sam, and Ransom are all trying to haul their luggage up by themselves, Steve, Cole, and the guy with glasses that you didn’t catch his name yet are stuck behind them. Steve doesn’t look to be breaking a sweat, Cole and the other guy look like they could use a rest for a moment. It makes you giggle. Bucky sighs and walks past you,

“Excuse me, ma’am.” He whispers as he passes, you slide to the side and watch as he walks straight up to Ransom, Peter, and Tony, grabs their bags from them, and throws them over his shoulders as he brings them inside. Tony scoffs and just follows, Peter looks embarrassed, Ransom calls out a thanks and then falls in line. You turn to face Ari again and you feel an arm drape over your shoulders, you know who it is without looking.

“So, when does the party start!” Ransom asks and squeezes your shoulder. “Speaking for everyone I think we could use some drinks.” He laughs and Tony agrees. Ari looks at Bucky and then over your shoulder to Steve, he nods and they both understand what he’s saying without even uttering a word.

“Actually we don’t party till tonight,” Ari explains. “We have to work before we can just slack off and lucky for you fellas you got here at the start of the day!” You sneak a look at Bucky, his smile has a hint of a mischievous nature, he winks and then gets real serious.

“So if you men will follow me,” Bucky turns and walks out the front door, “we need to get you dressed and in the field.” He walks down the steps and then turns back when he realizes no one if following him. “We are burning daylight!” He hollers, “you wanna eat and party, well you gotta work for your food. Let’s go!” Something about the authoritative voice and serious expression makes the men jump to follow. “Rogers bring up the rear!” Bucky heads to the barn and the four guys follow behind. Peter looks back at you and you gently smile and wave.

“Okay ladies,” Ari pulls your attention back to him, he smiles. “How about some mimosas?”

The thick wrangler jeans land on the ground in front of Ransom and he stares down at them in disgust. A t-shirt and button up carhart shirt is tossed at him and hits him square in the chest. “You’re insane if you think I’m wearing this,” he says sharply. Bucky shrugs and continues to toss the clothes to the others. Sam and Peter are already changing and Tony is begrudgingly picking the clothes up as they are throw his way.

“Suit yourself, but those loafers and kakis won’t do you any good as you help shovel horse shit.” Bucky explains. “And no, we won’t send them out for dry cleaning if they get messed up.”

He laughs as he looks Ransom up and down and then turns away. Tony picks up the clothes and shoves them in his arms.

“Get dressed and stop pouting, it’s giving you early wrinkles.” Tony teases and Ransom grumbles as he changes. Sam and Peter are already dressed and messing around, shoving each other and tipping their hats and stuff. “This is gonna be a long 4 months.” Tony mumbles and sits his hat on his head before walking to join the others. Steve passes by Ransom.

“You’re burning daylight, get changed.” He leaves Ransom alone in the back room of the barn.

Natasha won’t stop smirking as she sips her mimosa. She glances at Ari and then back at you. “So Ari? Any woman working on this Ranch?” Ari turns around and looks between Natasha and you.

“Oh, umm no.” He fidgets. “An all male staff, I hope that’s alright.” He says, glancing your way and then back to her. The smirk she gives him makes your stomach drop because you know she’s up to something.

“Oh Ari, that’s perfect.” She finishes her glass and then stands up. “So this tour-” She asks but is interrupted by someone walking out of the office off the living room.

“Ari, we need to talk when you have a minute,” he is staring down at some papers in hand. He finally glances up and sees the 4 women sitting in front of him. “Oh! These must be the rest of our guests!” He smiles and crosses the room, “I’ve met one of you already,” he smiles at you, “but I haven’t had the pleasure with the rest. I’m Andy, Ari’s business partner.” He smiles sweetly, Natasha narrows her gaze and looks between the two men before walking to stand in front of Andy.

“Oh, I’m sure you’re a great team,” she says as she looks him up and down. Andy smirks and then lightly laughs as he looks down at her.

“I run the books, he runs this place and he does what he’s told. Pretty good setup if you ask me.” He answers, and something about that makes you a little hot. Natasha blushes and then backs down, you’ve never seen her back down when flirting with a man. You give her a look and she blushes even more. “Anyway,” Andy smirks, “I’m sure Ari is treating you right. I see the men are already being put to work?”

Ari laughs, “yeah, Barnes and Rogers are giving them the special welcome.” Amelia laughs.

“Why does that sound dirty?” Lizzy scoffs,

“Cause you three are hornier than a teenage boy at the beach in the summer.” Andy laughs.

“It’s some kind of hazing, isn’t it?” She asks. Andy and Ari exchange a look.

“Well, when they come in acting like they owned the place we needed to be shown to them they in fact, don’t.” Ari explains with a wicked smile that makes you laugh.

“Oh good, Ransom’s gonna love that.” You exclaim and all the girls laugh along. “But I think Peter and Sam should have gotten a pass, they were just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

Andy and Ari look at each other again and Andy shrugs. Ari goes to grab his walkie talky from the kitchen.

“Barnes? Send Boy wonder and mister manners to the house. Over.” Ari waits a minute and then he gets a response.

“Copy that. What about Silver spoon and Hefner wannabe? Over” Bucky answers back.

You laugh and look at the other girls, you all can’t help but giggle at the nicknames the guys have already earned. Ari smirks and looks back at you before answering Bucky back.

“Leave them shoveling the shit and when they are done let them get cleaned up. Over” Ari lays his walkie down and he heres a “Roger that” as he walks back over to where you girls are sitting. Peter and Sam come walking in the front door, Natasha whistles and Sam spins around and tips his hat. Peter blushes and looks from you to Natasha. Amelia walks over and looks Sam over.

“Looking good, Babe!” She kisses his cheek and he pulls her close. "Oh but you smell like shit.” He grumbles and you all laugh.

“Yeah yeah, laugh all you want but now you’re stuck with my stinky ass till I can shower.” He hugs her tight and she screams as he lifts her up and spins her around. Lizzy sighs,

“I’m sure Tony is gonna be in the worst mood after this. But he deserves it, especially after his attitude with me this morning.” Peter laughs.

“Can you blame him? You shoved the guy in the car with Ransom, that would make anyone a little testy.” Peter justifies and Lizzy just shakes her head.

Ari and Andy just listen to the group of you talk, Andy sees Ari watching you and Natasha, he is so smitten and small, it starts to rub Andy the wrong way and eventually Andy nods for Ari to follow him, so he excuses himself and finds Andy in the office. “Ari,” Andy says, voice firm and authoritative.

“Don’t start,” Ari sighs and tries to walk out, Andy stops him.

“Ari sit down, now.” Not a request but a command. Ari grumbles but he does it. “All I was gonna say is you are acting like a blushing bride with those two women, which I do find rather adorable,” he teases and Ari rolls his eyes and laughs, wiping his sweat-less brow before meeting Andy’s gaze again. “But when it comes to ladies, you’re not like that.” Andy crosses his arms and stares him down, “get out there and be Hard-ass Ari, stop with this blushing and stumbling over your words.” He straightens up and walks closer to the man sitting in the armchair, “Go, be a big strong man and catch their eyes before Barnes and Rogers do. Find your little ‘pet’’.” Ari stands up and goes to leave but stops and faces Andy.

“What’s your obsession with me finding my own ‘pet’? Ever since Jane left you’ve been riding my ass about it.” Ari asks.

“Well one it’s cause you have a great ass,” Andy states matter of factly and Ari rolls his eyes again. “And two it’s cause you need someone to take care of. You need to meet that caregiver need of yours, so go out there and put your charms on one of those women.” Ari looks at the ground and then back at Andy.

“You think I’m just gonna take that order and hop to it?” He asks and Andy smirks.

“It’s what you do best, Ari.”

Ari huffs out a laugh and shakes his head as he grumbles, he turns around, ready to follow the order Andy just gave.

*****************************************************

When the two men disappear Natasha turns to you and garbs your hands, “Please for your own sake, go to Paris with those two men.” You are speechless and look around to see if the others heard her, they didn’t.

“Natasha” you hiss and she smirks, “what makes you think they are-“

“Did you see them? Did you hear Andy?! He was all ‘I run the place and Ari follows orders well.’ He was NOT meaning Ari is a good business partner.” You shake your head and Natasha physically stops you, taking your face in her hands. “You need to get between those two men and let them have their way with you, cause I’m scared if you don’t you’re gonna fall head over heels for that tall, handsome cowboy and that is not what you need after your literal wedding was called off.” You deflate, honestly you hadn’t thought about him or the wedding since you stepped out of the uber this morning. “I’m sorry, babes. I don’t mean to bring down the mood. But you don’t need to catch feelings and I know you- you will catch feelings for that cowboy. But you’ll have a great time and be able to move on as friends with Daddy and Daddier.” You lightly laugh and sigh, removing her hands from your face and lean back to look up at the ceiling. “You haven’t had your rebound, so rebound between those two hunks and call it a day.”

“I’ll see,” you agree and Natasha about squeals. Peter looks over.

“What are you two squealing about?” He asks, Natasha smirks and blows him a kiss.

“Oh nothing Pete, just some rebounding fun.” She winks at you and you lightly shove her. Peter laughs and sits next to you on the couch.

“You’re like my sister, so please don’t sleep with any of these men. They aren’t worth you.” He begs and you laugh.

“Peter you don’t even know them! And I wasn’t agreeing to it, I was just thinking about it.” You exclaim and Peter just shakes his head. The back door opens and in walks Steve. He smiles and takes off his hat.

“Just wanted to warn you all that those two guys are about done and they are not happy so, maybe make yourselves scarce.” He says and then leaves out the door he came in. You all laugh and stay exactly where you are. Bucky walks in the back door in the mudroom with the biggest smile on his face, a shit covered Ransom walks behind him and a dirt covered Tony falls in line behind.

“Alright you two, go hit the showers and then we can start on the tour.” Bucky says and points to the shower room off the mudroom. They both grumble and do as they are told, not noticing you all sitting there and watching. He turns to you and your heart flutters as you meet his gaze, his eyes are so blue and his smile makes you feel safe. You take a breath and look at Natasha,

"Okay you’re right. I’ll fall in love with him, so give me the two big men.” Natasha smirks and nods as she looks over her shoulder, the sound of Ari returning peaking her interest.

“Speak of the devil” she whispers and you blush before turning around and staring firmly at the ground.

“Are you shitting me?!” Ransom screams, “you were all in here drinking and laughing while I shoveled literal shit for an hour?!” He looks back at Ari and then Bucky who are both smiling ear to ear. Bucky tips his hat and then straightens up from where he was leaning on the wall.

“Maybe next time you’ll walk into someone else’s house with a little more respect.” Bucky says, his tone makes a shiver run down your back and you look to Natasha to hide the fact that you liked it. She glares at you and mouths ‘no’, you smile anyway and then look back at both men.

“Alright how about you all follow Barnes and Rogers to the Barn and we will get you all ready for our tour.” He looks down at the choice of footwear you ladies had, “and we will get you all some proper riding boots too.” You follow Steve out to the Barn, you can feel Bucky’s gaze on you and you don’t hate it. He gently ushers you to the side when he is getting around you to help Steve with the saddles, the small graze of his hand makes you want to melt. Who knew you were so touch starved. You look at Natasha and she sighs, coming up along side you.

“Yes he is perfect, and handsome, and a gentleman, and probably the exact guy you should date and marry. But are you ready for that type of man after-“ you glare at her, making sure she doesn’t say his name. She doesn’t, “get his number, become friends, rebound with those two men and when you are fully healed over the trauma of the monster from hell, give him a call. Don’t make him a rebound,” she whispers and you sigh knowing she is right. Bucky and Steve get all the horses saddled and ready. They start helping everyone into their horses, Sam helps Amelia and Tony tries to help Lizzy but she ends up waiting for Steve to boost her up. Tony huffs and gets on his horse with minimal struggle, thanks to the step stool. Natasha swings herself up on her horse and impresses Steve who was standing by to help, she tosses him a little wink before looking over at you. She sighs as she sees Bucky making his way over. You are trying to figure it out for yourself but almost fall on your ass in doing so, two strong arms catch you and haul you up to your feet.

“Careful there,” the low voices rumbles quietly. You turn and meet Bucky’s gaze, “Need some help?” He asks and you can’t find the words so you just nod. He lifts you by your waist and sets you right on top on the horses back, completely effortless. You straddle the horse and graze Bucky’s hands as he hands you the reigns. He gives a polite pat to the horses neck and is off to his own horse. You watch as he climbs on the back of his horse, his literal white horse. You look at Natasha who just shakes her head and laughs. Ari walks into the barn and right past you and up to his horse, Bucky had gotten the steed ready for him. He hops on the back and guides the horse around with so much ease.

“Okay, so some of our men will be placed along the group to help guide the horses if they start misbehaving. This here is Cole,” the clumsy man from early waves, “Carter,” the pretty boy who looks like he’s only ridden a horse to play polo just nods, “Jensen,” the guy with glasses who helped with the bags earlier tips his hat, “and of course you know Bucky and Steve.” They both wave and it’s not lost on you that they have made their way behind you and Natasha in this lineup. “We have a lot of men on staff, some you haven’t met yet. You’ll meet them soon enough. We will take you around the property and tell you about our day to day lives and what will be happening while you’re here. Okay if we are all saddled,” he looks at Ransom who has finally mounted his horse and grumbles about it. “We will be on our way,” Ari turns his horse and leads out the back of the Barn on the trail.

The countryside is so beautiful you could cry. Ari explains how you all came at a time where they will be working a lot with moving the cattle for spring and that there will probably be quite a few baby animals born while you’re here. He shows you all the different barns and where the animals are kept. Chickens, goats, sheep, cattle, even pigs and Dogs. There is literally a whole farm on this Ranch along with a garden and bees for honey. It’s like a homesteading dream. The whole time Ari keeps glancing back towards you and Natasha. And you keep seeing Bucky looking at you as you look to the side at Natasha. Steve is friendly and hits it off with Sam, turns out they both served in the army around the same time. Bucky too. Ransom, Tony, and Carter are kinda grumpy in the back of the line, Peter is enjoying the sights and chatting with Ari, Amelia and Lizzy are taking selfies and talking with Cole and Jensen. Bucky moves his horse in between yours and Natasha’s, “So where are yall from?” He asks. You look over to him and start to answer but Natasha speaks for you.

“We are from New York City," she says, You notice a little smile break across Bucky’s face and then he looks over to you. He notices your left hand and the tan line there on your ring finger.

“What part?” He asks and again Natasha answers.

“Upper East Side.” She says shortly. You see the realization about what that tan line means spread across his face and then he reacts to what Natasha just said as he nods as he whistles.

“Fancy digs,” he says “too fancy for a Brooklyn boy like me.” He says as he gives a sad little smile. He lets his horse slow down a bit to fall back behind you. You turn and look at him, forgetting about the trail in front of you.

“You’re from New York too?!” You ask, hopeful. He smiles and nods.

“I am, go home every so often to visit my mama. I love it there but I needed a change after the Army. I found the ranch and Ari and well…. I guess there hasn’t been any reason enough to move back to the city and away from all this beauty.” He nods the to mountains surrounding them. You make an agreeable noise and turn back around, Natasha is just facing forward shaking her head, she knows you’re already smitten. You pull up to a little clearing and all dismount your horses, there are some picnic tables set up and food already waiting for lunch.

“Wow, the service is impeccable.” Tony says and Lizzy laughs and pokes his side. Bucky helps you down and before you can say thank you Ransom is by your side pulling you along to sit.

“Okay, so when I heard ‘Dude ranch’ I didn’t except to actually be working on a ranch for 4 months.” He says and you just laugh as you shove him off of you.

Lunch is delicious and fresh and hits the spot after being in the sun for a few hours. The horses are resting and you all sit around the table while Ari tells you about the Ranch. “Everyone goes by nicknames or their last name.” He explains. Ransom speaks up,

“Well what’s yours then, Chief?” He quips. Steve answers,

“Hard-Ass,” everyone laughs and Ari shrugs and smiles.

“I like a tightly run ship, what can I say.” He says,

“Well this is a ranch so,” Steve joke and he gets a strawberry to the face for it, he catches it in his mouth though. “Let’s see who else? Oh! Cole is Ghost” Amelia laughs.

“Umm why?” She asks and Cole blushes and sighs.

“Because I have a tendency to get Ghosted.” He says sheepishly, all the women awe and refuse to believe that, the guys laugh. You slap Ransom’s arm and he nudges you back. Steve starts again.

“Jensen is just-Jensen, Carter is usually called by his last name- Baizen-“ you and Natasha look at one another, Tony and Ransom laugh.

“Wait?! Carter Baizen as in-“ you start and Tony finishes.

“The one that got shipped off to pay back his debts?!” He laughs and tosses a strawberry in the air and catches it in his mouth. “This is great!” Steve looks to Carter who just rolls his eyes and then back to the group.

“Yall know him??” He asks and Ransom answers.

“Bet your ass we do, I knew you looked familiar! You still owe me 10 grand.” Ransom says and the other ranch hands look at him and just shake their heads.

“Classic,” Bucky mutters. Steve quickly changes the subject.

“Anyway, um we call Bucky, Barnes or Sarge. And they call me Rogers or Cap.”

“Wait were you a Sargent and Captain when enlisted?” Sam asks. “I am not saluting while shoveling shit.” He jokes and Steve laughs.

“Yeah we were and don’t worry, we won’t make you.” He jokes. You look at Bucky and he looks a little embarrassed to have attention on him.

“Well what about us?” Peter asks, “do we have nicknames?” You girls laugh and nod.

“Oh yeah, Boy wonder, Mister manners, Silver Spoon, and Hefner Wannabe.” You tease and they all look at each other and point to try and figure out who is who. You giggle and just take in the sight of being surrounded with your oldest friends and hopefully some new ones. Natasha smirks and sits up straight.

“Well I want a nickname!” She exclaims and Ransom laughs.

“You have one, Black widow.” He says creepily and you all laugh, She scoffs and Steve speaks up.

“Umm why are you nicknamed after a deadly spider that kills her mate?” He honestly looks a little scared. Natasha smirks and leans forward grazing her fingers across the back of his hand.

“Because sweetheart, I eat men alive,” she sits back, “and they always come back for more.” She bites her lip and looks him up and down, you swear you see him gulp and then blush. Amelia laughs and then pipes in

“Well you can just call me by my name, Amelia.”

Lizzy agrees.

“Me too, just Lizzy.” She says sweetly as she leans her head on Tony’s shoulder. You look a little shy as everyone looks to you.

“Well? What are you going by?” Steve asks and you blush.

“Oh, I don’t know,” you shrug, “come up with something!” You laugh. They all start conversing on what to call you, Bucky is still quiet until he meets your gaze.

“Sunshine,” everyone turns to look at Bucky. He keeps your gaze, “your nickname should be sunshine.” He gently smiles and then stands from the table. “I’m gonna go check the horses,” he looks up at the sky, “we should be getting back, Hard-Ass.” He says and everyone lets out a chuckle. Ari agrees.

“Yeah, it’s gonna take even longer to get back so we should get a move on. Everyone load up, we pull out in 10.” Everyone leaves the table, you are still stuck in your spot, having been glued there by Bucky’s gaze.

“So, Sunshine,” Natasha teases, “What are we gonna do with you?” You blush and shove her away as she laughs. You laugh and head to find your horse.

“And that brings us back to the main house.” Ari says as he stops and turns his horse to face the whole group. “We are gonna head back to the Barn, the guys will give you all the proper procedures on how to care for the horses after a ride and then we will take you all to your rooms to rest and get ready for dinner.” You trot your horse to the barn and get it in the stall. You hop off and see Steve coming your way.

“Well, Sunshine,” he says and you turn to see the big smile on his face. “Let’s get Princess settled, huh?!” You look between him and the horse and realized you didn’t even know your horses name.

“Princess? Thats her name?” You ask and Steve laughs.

“Well that’s his name.” He laughs and so do you.

“What?!” You exclaim and Steve continues to laugh.

“He is a diva and drama queen, the name was fitting.” He shrugs and you just laugh again. He helps get the saddle off and teaches you how to brush Princess out. You enjoy every moment you have with Steve, he is sweet and you just feel at home. Something you haven't felt in a long time. “Okay, you’re all done. You wanna see your room? I can have someone show you up.”

“Sure, thanks!”

“No problem, hey Sarge come here!” Steve looks over his shoulder at you and smirks. You gasp and because he feels like a long lost best friend, you punch his shoulder. He laughs and winks before Bucky arrives.

“What?” He grumbles before he sees you. His face lights up.

“She needs to know where her room is, you wanna take her?” Steve explains, he must be giving Bucky some faces cause Bucky is just staring at him and then smiles and laughs.

“Sure thing, right this way.” He turns and walks out of the stall and Steve pushes you to follow. You catch up to Bucky as he reaches the steps of the house.

“If you’re busy I’m sure I can just find my way around,” you offer, “I don’t want to keep you from work.” Bucky turns and smiles as he stops in his tracks.

“Sunshine,” the way it falls off his lips makes you want to kiss him senseless. “You aren’t keeping me from anything, I promise.” You blush and look at your feet.

“You promise?” You ask and he lightly laughs and confirms again.

“I promise, follow me.” He leads you into the main house, you see the bags are gone, probably already in the rooms. “You have room all to yourself, private balcony and full standing shower and separate tub.” Bucky explains as he leads you up the stairs. You feel flushed as you glance at his ass, it’s a pretty great ass.

“Oh goodness, I hope that doesn’t put anyone else out!” You exclaim as you realize the grandness of what he just said. “I don’t need a private room!” Bucky smiles and looks back at you.

“Take it up with the boss,” he shrugs and then continues to lead the way. You follow behind quietly, as you get to the second floor you are in awe, you didn’t realize how big this place really is. There is a whole landing with another living room and entertainment center. Along with a little library off to the side in a little nook. “Okay, your room is back this way,” he leads you along through the second living room and through a little landing area that looks over the first floor. This hallway has 6 rooms, four of them say “private residence” and the other 2 just have numbers on the door. “Right here, room 1” Bucky leans up against the wall and knocks on the number plate on the door. “Natasha is room two right next door, and yes there is a door that conjoins them if you want to unlock it.” You laugh and thank him. You both reach for the handle and end up basically holding hands. “Oh ha, umm sorry.” He blushes and gently pulls his hand back. You giggle and cover your face.

“I’m sorry, I’m not normally this- well- girly and giggly.” You explain and Bucky just smiles. He opens the door and motions for you to head inside.

“It’s okay,” he assures you, “I like it.” He smiles and you blush even more. He then clears his throat and gets pretty serious for a moment. “I do want to ask, and if it’s out of line ma’am then I’m sorry,” he shuffles in the doorway, “I could help but notice your ring finger, are you involved with someone? Or were?” He asks and for the first time ever you didn’t feel pain or hurt at the thought of telling anyone about him, you felt like you would be seen, like you would be safe. You look down at the tan line and sigh.

“I was,” you simply say, “I was supposed to get married back in December but he-“ you stop for a moment and then take a breath. “He called it off.” Bucky’s eyes are so sad for you, he goes to move and then remembers he is in his muddy boots, he looks at the carpet and curses under his breath.

“I- I’m so sorry,” he says your real name, “you didn’t deserve that.” You give a sad smile and nod.

“Yeah, well there is way more to that story than meets the eye,” you look at him and your breath catches again, “and maybe once we know each other a little better I’ll be ready to talk about it.” You explain, Bucky nods.

“I understand,” he says before “whenever you’re ready, I’m here.” He lightly laughs, “and hey maybe I’ll tell you about my own personal runaway bride experience.” He says and your heart stops, he gets it. In this moment, this is why you felt safe and like you could tell him and he would catch you, he’s lived it.

“I’d like that,” you answer and then realize how stupid that sounded, “I mean,” you blush and stumble over your words, “not that it’s great- I would love to talk about- shared life experiences and stuff- I’m just gonna stop.” You finally say and Bucky just stands there with a smile and a chuckle.

“You’re cute,”He says before turning to leave. “See you at dinner.” He waves before he disappears into one of the private rooms right next to yours.

*****************************************************

“I’m such a fucking idiot,” Bucky groans and Steve laughs before he kicks Bucky’s leg. He is lying back on his bed and Steve has come to laugh at him in his misery. “ ‘You’re cute,’?!? That sounds like something a friend would say, or Cole!” He groans. “Ugh and Ari is about to try and get her into bed with him and Andy, I just know it.” Steve hums in agreement.

“Does that make you mad?” Steve asks.

“I mean a little but she’s not mine, she’s her own woman and if she wants to sleep with him then fine. I’ll play the long game, be there for her.” Bucky explains, Steve listens and smiles.

“Awww you really like her!” He gushes and Bucky sits up just to punch him in the arm.

“Oh whatever, go let Natasha eat you for Dinner or something.” Bucky grumbles and Steve laughs.

“I just might,” he says under his breath and Bucky laughs. “Look Ari and Andy are good guys and our friends, if she’s gonna sleep with someone at least it’s them and not Johnny or Collin.” Bucky shivers at the thought. “And hey, maybe she’s not even thinking like that! Just cause she’s blushing and stuff doesn’t mean she’s about to hop in bed.” Bucky sighs and looks at Steve.

“I heard Boy wonder talking to Silver spoon about how the girls were discussing who she should rebound with.” Bucky explains. “That's why I was grumpy when you called me over in the barn, that’s when I had heard them.”

“Oh, well… let her rebound and then pull out all the stops, she will come running. I just know it!” Steve says encouragingly. “Anyway, you smell like shit and so do I- I’m gonna go shower and change. So should you, also wash your sheets cause you being all in your feelings, you laid on your clean bed in your dirt covered clothes.” Steve says as he walks out and across the hall to his room, he glances and sees the light on underneath your door and Natasha’s. He laughs and goes to get cleaned up.

You change your dress for a third time and opt for a simple blue tunic dress and some vans. You curl your hair and put on some simple makeup before knocking on the joining door to Natasha’s room. It swings open, “help me zip this up?” She asks. She seems to have pulled out all the stops and is in a tight black dress.

“Well hello to you too,” you tease as you zip up her dress. “You know we are eating around a bonfire, right?” She turns and smirks,

“Yup, but that pit won’t be the only thing on fire tonight.” She winks and you laugh and then boo her.

“Oh booo that was bad and you know it.” You turn to go grab your phone from your bed and grab your room key. Closing and locking the door behind you, you turn and bump right into the wall. But then the wall was breathing and lightly laughing, you look up and meet Andy’s gaze.

“Whoa there, you okay?” He asks as he steadies you. A heat spreads through your face and you nod.

“Yeah, sorry. I should slow down a little more.” You joke and take a step back. Natasha exists her room and eyes you both before smirking and slipping by, you give a nervous laugh and motion that you are gonna follow her. Linking your arm with hers and hurrying off as Andy watches with amusement.

Dinner is good and the company is even better, the guys are all getting to know the other ranch hands while the girls sit around the fire. Bucky and Ari sit on the other side of the fire and you can feel their eyes on you as you talk with Natasha and Lizzy. You throw little glances their way and just smile every so often, it’s all very tame and fun. That is till Natasha brings out the shots.

“Nope! Everyone is drinking unless you are sober.” She starts pointing and waiting for anyone to back out and they don’t. “Alright, bottoms up!” Ari feels he needs to remind everyone that wake up calls start at 7am, and he gets boooed relentlessly till he finally gives up with his reminders. You are about 3 shots in when you find yourself sitting next to Bucky on a little wooden bench.

“So is this sweet cowboy charm just that? Charm. Or are you actually this much of a gentleman? Cause I’ve been burned and I- well- let’s just say if I fall for this then I’m falling hard. And I can’t do that unless I know you’re gonna catch me.” You can’t believe the words that are pouring out of your mouth. How strong are these shots?? Bucky gives you a sad smile and reaches out to twirl a strand of your hair around his finger.

“I’ll catch you, Sunshine.” You smile and start to lean closer but Natasha pulling you up from the seat and demanding that you dance with her makes the moment pass and it’s gone before it starts. She twirls you around and you end up in the arms of Ransom as she sits herself right in the spot you were occupying with Bucky.

“Okay Sarge, let’s talk.” She says, all cheer gone from her voice. Bucky turns and looks at her. “She’s been hurt, bad. Her ex was a master manipulator and built her up just to break her down. And as her best friend who had to check on her every day for three straight weeks because I was scared she wasn’t eating, I will not allow anyone to hurt her that way again.” Bucky looks over at you and then quietly levels with Natasha.

“Is that why you’re encouraging her to sleep with two men she just met?” He looks back at her, his face hard and unchanging. Natasha sighs.

“I’m trying get her to loosen up, also I know her, she’s not gonna sleep with them. Maybe fool around but she’d never go that far with someone new.” She takes a sip of her water. “I don’t want to tell her story for her so all I will say is she has made herself into the perfect wife for a man who didn’t choose her when push came to shove. For years she chipped away pieces of herself to fit what he wanted,” she looks at Bucky again, “I just want to make sure she doesn’t fall into the same pattern, because there’s not much left to chip away.” Bucky nods and takes her water from her hand and takes a sip for himself.

“Well that’s where you have the wrong idea of me, Natasha.” Bucky says plainly. “All I wanna do is add to her life, for whatever little time she lets me.” He says before he stands up and heads inside for bed.

Ransom is talking your ear off as you watch Natasha and Bucky talk. They don’t seem to be flirting which is good, but they don’t look happy either. “What do you say, huh?” You turn and look up at Ransom.

“Oh umm what? Sorry.” You lightly laugh and he sighs.

“I said what if we turned in for the night. Maybe head up to your room,” your stomach drops at what he’s suggesting, he’s one of your best friends, why is he saying this! “and you let me use that amazing tub of yours?!” There it is, you laugh and punch his arm before moving away from him. He laughs and waves you off as he goes back to bothering Tony and Lizzy. You find Natasha.

“Hey what did you and Bucky talk about?” You ask, hopeful. Natasha sees the look in Your eyes and sighs.

“We talked about you of course and how you should 100% try to get with Ari tonight. Shake off those cobwebs and just be a little care free!” She knows she shouldn’t lie to you but until she can get a good gage on Bucky, you needed someone you wouldn’t get attached to.

“Bucky said Ari is a great guy- probably one of the best here- Andy too!” You are a little taken aback.

“No for real what did you talk about?” You ask, she doubles down.

“Seriously, he said that he liked you but he’s not in a place to really be with anyone, dealing with his own baggage at the moment.” She hopes that’s believable, for all she knows he’s the most baggage free guy in the world. Your heart on the other hand breaks, you wonder how recent his failed wedding was and you coming on to him probably didn’t help. You look over your shoulder to Ari.

“He really said I should go for it?” You ask, the sadness in your tone could be heard even when Natasha couldn’t see your face.

“Yeah babes,” she prays you will forgive her for this, but it’s for the best. You take a breath and look back at Natasha.

“Well alright then,” you say sadly. You make your way over to Ari and grab a bottle of rum on the way.

“Oh fuck,” Natasha mutters, “What the hell have I done.

Next

Taglist: @theinheriteddutchess

@georgiapeach30513 @welp-heregoessomething @hisredheadedgoddess28 @cadencejames87

@distractingbeth @sarahowritesostucky @sarahdonald87 @patzammit

And anyone else who wants a tag, say so below!

[schemmentisimpasours]

Chapter 2: Choosing Mr. Robinson

Summary: Melissa has to deal with the fact that you walked away because of her.

TW: Mentions of some religious guilt

Previous Chapter- Next Chapter

M asterlist

(How did y'all turn a one-shot into a 4/5 part series? I don't mind but damn.)

-

Determined to figure out what happened Melissa cornered Barb in her classroom while she was picking up to leave for the day, “Why she leave Abbott?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” Barb said reaching for her purse.

“I heard yous talking about me yesterday,” Melissa said crossing her arms, “I'm a big girl just tell me what happened. Was it cause of me?”

Melissa thought she was prepared for the answer but when a curt yes came from her work wife she could feel her heart snapping into two. She should have opened that damn door. Should have told you how she felt but instead she had gone to him. Why had she gone to him? 

“Can you get out of the door and let me go home please? It has been a hard day,” Barbara said tears welling in her eyes again.

“Listen I know yous was close. She was like a daughter to ya. I just want to explain,” Melissa begged as her voice cracked on her last word, “Please.”

Barb sat on top of her desk and nodded at Melissa to start. She was too good of a person to not let her best friend explain herself. She could see how much it was tearing the red head apart.

“We were at the conference and I… I was so sick of looking at Y/N and wondering what if. What if just this once I did something that scared me. If I let myself feel these emotions I was suppressing. Let myself be loved” Melissa said her voice quavering, “So I kissed her. Right at the bar so maybe I could explain to myself when it didn't work it was because we had been drinking.”

Barbara tsked but Melissa continued, “I wasn't drunk. Not even close. I bought a drink sure but I didn't take a sip. I took her to my room and we had sex. She went to leave when we were done and I couldn't… i couldn't let her go. So she stayed. That next morning I watched her wake up and rationalized to myself that it would just be for the weekend and when we came back my little appetite for her would be Satisfied.”

“That sunday morning as she laid asleep in my arms I told her I loved her. She didn't hear me. I'm sure of it. But the admission scared the fuck out of me I ran out the room and never looked back,” Melissa said tears falling down her face but she made no effortt to wipe them away, “I grew up my whole life think I would go to hell for being gay.. that I was wrong.I looked down at the woman I loved and felt dirty.”

“Now wait a damn minute, that isn't true sweetheart. God loves all his children. There is nothing wrong with being gay, lesbian, transgender, nonbinary, anything,” Barbara soothed reaching out for Melissa.

This only made Melissa cried more as she hugged her friend, “Never thought yous say that stuff.”

Barbara’s tone got serious, “I may be religious but that doesn't mean I have to be a monster. People who don't believe in love and expression of individuality are scum of the earth. But sweetheart you really hurt Y/N with everything you did. Even if I told you where she was I don't know if you can fix this. You chose Captain Robinson.”

“What a choice that was he yelled at me for my black eye. Saying I should have waited for the police. That I shouldn't be carrrying around my bat. Like I need a man in my life to fix everything,” She said angrily, “I'm so stupid Barb.”

“Well you have never been one to take a man’s advice. So I don't think you should take his,” Barb soothed, “Now what are you going to do about this mess you got yourself in?

“I don't know,” Melissa responded crying again, “I don't have the slightest clue.”

Her work wife reached for hand and held it till Melissa had calmed again, “I believe in you dear. You will do what is right.”

As Barb finally left and Melissa was left picking up her classroom she didn't even know what the right thing was anymore. All the overthinking had a migraine forming and she sorted through her desk to find medicine when she found a purple sticky note. 

When Melissa had been given to classrooms for one year you had left her notes every morning in random spots giving her small inspirational quotes to help her through. Always with a purple sticky note and you never once revealed where you had put them. Melissa could have sworn she found them all and honestly had been a little sad when you had stopped writing them out for her. That had been shortly after she had ignored your time together at the conference so she added it to her list of failures as she read your words.

Melissa, I'm scared as hell to want you as much as I do. But I am here, wanting you anyways. And I know people are temporary but I hope every night that this will be permanent.

Wet circles formed on the small note as Melissa cried over it. The love of her life had wanted her as much as she had. Had begged her to stay. And Melissa had let them slip away. Pushed them towards the door. 

It was through these tears that Melissa had her idea. She was gonna show up. Anyway she could until she could prove that she wouldn't leave.. and right now the only way to do that was to send a text. Every day till she could find you. 

Before she could regret her decision she sent the first one: You could never be temporary in my life. I am sorry that I have hurt you. I will spend my life trying to make up for my mistake.

-

Taglist

@cupldscntrl

[kittenfangirl20]

Lucifer: It’s not that, I am unworthy of love. It’s my fault that my mom is dead. My dad and brother are right to hate me even if they are assholes. I think I loved you from the moment I saw you as a child, you are my love, my everything.

Lucifer caught flashes of the fire in the circus, his friend who was a clown at the circus getting hurt. Worst of all his mother being devoured by the fire. All of this causing Lucifer to break down crying. He tried to kiss Adam, but he turned into a bunch of feathers and he found himself back at the interrogation room.

Husk: Hey is everything alright?

Lucifer: No, but I am glad that you are here with me, you are a good friend. Both you and Angel mean so much to me as well. I am just so afraid of being vulnerable with Adam only to find out he doesn’t feel the same way.

Husk wanted to shake Lucifer and tell him that it was obvious to everyone that Adam loved him as much as he did.

Lucifer: It also hurts to see that fucking bitch Lilith hurt him. I never hated someone as much as I hate Lilith, I want to kill her.

Husk could understand, if someone was hurting Angel, he would want to kill them as well. Just then the portal opened and out came Angel along with Charlie and a Hellhound wearing an eyepatch.

Husk: Who is the new girl?

Charlie: This is Vaggie, she is mom’s newest bodyguard and my girlfriend.

Lucifer: Nice to meet you Maggie.

They ignored the fact that Lucifer got Vaggie’s name wrong and got them both untied. Just then agents spilled into the room to fight. While the agents just had weapons from the Edo period, I.M.P. had a large variety of weapons. When all the agents were taken care of, the building went into lockdown.

Charlie: I can’t read the book in these flashing lights.

Just then Agent Two went rigid and her eyes became glowing gold orbs.

Adam: Who dares to harm my Luci?

Agent One: Agent Two?

Adam: What’s the matter demon hunter, have you ever faced a real demon?

Just then some of the corpses got up and used the blood to draw a demon summoning circle. Black feathers flew out of Agent Two’s mouth which took on the form of Adam in an Eldritch form. Agent One was screaming in horror, but Lucifer had never been more turned on in his life. In fact he was quite sure that he was sporting a very noticeable boner right now. Once Agent One pissed his pants and ran away holding Agent Two, Adam went back to his usual form.

Adam: Are you alright darling?

Lucifer: Yeah, how did you find us.

Adam: I have my ways, you need to be more careful in the mortal world. If you get into trouble, I get into trouble and we don’t want that.

All of them except for Adam: No sir.

Adam: Now that is over with, it looks like we need some alone time to take care of your little problem. Though honestly that is anything but little.

Lucifer: Sounds like a plan.

Lucifer jumped into Adam’s arms ready for a night of passionate fucking. Husk gave Lucifer a look that said “Tell him.” But Lucifer wasn’t ready, he was still afraid of what Adam would say. Once everyone was in the right place, Adam took Lucifer back to his manor. They fell onto the bed making out. Their clothes became little more than strips of cloth once they were done tearing off their clothes. Lucifer plunged his dick deep into Adam’s cloaca.

Lucifer: You were so fucking hot when you saved us.

Their love making was so intense and passionate that they ended up breaking the bed. Afterwards they lay in the remains of the bed very satisfied.

Lilith: You are so fucking disgusting letting an imp fuck your fat ass.

Lucifer: Leave him alone you whore.

Lilith: I was just going to say that I am taking Abel for our little weekend trip, I expect the bed to be replaced by the time I return.

Lilith left with her swan like beak in the air.

Lucifer: You deserve so much better than that abusive bitch.

Adam: Thank you, Luci. At least with you here she didn’t hit me, I am sure she is running off to her brother, Steve, to complain about me.

While Stella was a swan Goetia like her mother, Steve was a peacock Goetia who had ice powers like their father. Lucifer just pulled Adam close to him and held him.

@things-arent-what-they-seem66

(Stolitz AU)

Adam woke up excitedly today was his birthday. Adam was a hawk Goetia with brown feathers that had flecks of gold in them. The feathers on the top of his head looked like a stylish short hairstyle and his eyes were golden orbs. The imp butler had the little boy dressed in a little suit with a cape. He ran downstairs to see his mom Sera and his younger sister Emily, both were dove Goetia while Adam got his hawk form from his father who was never around.

Sera: Happy Birthday Starlight, I am sorry that your father couldn’t make it but he has a message for you.

Adam: What is it?

Sera pulled out a Grimoire and handed it to Adam.

Sera: You are to learn the spells in this book and lead many legions of Hell. You will also study the Heavenly bodies as well.

Adam: Is there something else mama?

Sera looked hesitant like she didn’t want to say the next part.

Sera: Your father arranged a marriage for you when you are older to another Goetia named Lilith because you will need to make a precautionary heir. Here is her picture.

Sera pulled out a picture of a swan Goetia about Adam’s age who was strangling one of her pets which made Adam burst out into tears. Emily ran over Adam and hugged him while Sera ruffled the feathers on his head.

Emily: I know what would cheer you up, there is a circus close by and it will be lots of fun.

Adam: Ok.

Sera felt bad for Adam, but she knew her husband was adamant about Adam getting married. Later that day Sera took Adam and Emily to the circus. Many of Hellborn were surprised to see Goetia royalty there. Sera even bought ice cream cones for her children, mint chocolate chip for Adam and strawberry for Emily. They sat in the audience enjoying the show. But in spite of everything, Adam was still sad. That was until a little imp boy Adam’s age in a magicians suit, cape, and top hat walked out.

Announcer: Now for our boy magician, Lucifer the Morningstar.

Lucifer: I heard that someone has a birthday today in the crowd.

Adam: Me!!!!

Adam was enchanted with the imp that he thought was so cute. Lucifer walked into the audience over to Adam and he had a mischievous little smile. He pulled the top hat off of his head and pulled out a bouquet of sunflowers.

Lucifer: Happy Birthday.

Sera couldn’t help but notice how happy Lucifer was because of this little boy.

Adam's eyes sparkled as he accepted the flowers, they were beautiful and perfect. He hugged them to his chest as he smelled them.

Adam: Thank you.

The imp boy smiled at him and it made Adams heart flutter, he didn't know why but he liked the feeling.

Lucifer went back to the ring and did more of his magic tricks, Adam kept his eyes glued to him the whole time.

Later, while Adam and Emily were talking about the performances to each other, Sera went to find the ring master.

Sera: Excuse me?

Teddy: Yes?

Sera: I have an odd request, it's my son's birthday today and he really enjoyed that little magician that gave him flowers. Lucifer I believe. Would it be possible to have him spend the day with Adam? It's his birthday and he's very lonely.

Teddy: Hmmmm..... Sure.

-

Lucifer was putting his hat away when his father came in.

Teddy: Boy, I have a job for you.

Lucifer never liked it when he said those words.

-

Adam was so surprised when Lucifer and his dad showed up that afternoon. His face flushed as he looked at the imp boy.

Sera: Adam sweetie, you remember Lucifer? He's going to spend the day with you as a friend.

Adam's eyes sparkled: Really?!

Oh he was so excited he could barely stand it, once he got Lucifer inside he started talking about his plants and nature and the sky.

Beautiful topics. But not for a kid.

Lucifer: No offense, but this is boring.

Adam wilted a little, he wanted Lucifer to be happy. His plants made him happy so he thought it would work for him.

Adam: Oh.... I'm sorry..... I've never had a friend before just my sister and my plants..... I'm not sure what to do.

[ripgray-moved]

it's the way i just want people to love and be invested in peter after all the hard work i've put in him tbh.