#i just wish we'd gotten more of others!!
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💊 cradle pharmaceuticals
#zero escape#zero escape spoilers#9 hours 9 persons 9 doors#ace (999)#gentarou hongou#nagisa nijisaki#teruaki kubota#kagechika musashidou#this blog a little dead#but people were recently reblogging my old zero escape art#and i realised i never uploaded this#done for the morphogenesis zine!#who is the target audience for this image#me and the 4 other ace guys#a couple hongou/nijisaki shippers maybe#rolling up my sleeves somebody's gotta do it#in the long hindsight since the series ended i do wish we'd gotten a bit more info about cradle#and ace's games with gordain#but thats just my bias#zero escape i love youuuu
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so i remembered the scene in book!thg where katniss observes cato's manic reaction to her blowing up the supplies and clove/marvel trying to point to the sky to suggest that the person that did it is most likely dead and try to calm him down... and now i'm just like thinking of a hilarious dynamic established between cato and clove where cato has his anger issues and clove has gotten to know him so thoroughly, having had to experience the arena with him as her ally/partner and being forced to spend several weeks together, that she becomes one of the few people that can use logic and rationality to appease him, and frequently uses these strategies. and he in turn encourages her sadistic side and allows her to give in to her own rage. they would have such a good push and pull dynamic, riling one another up but also bringing each other back down to earth.
#idk what the point of any of this is i'm just rambling#i really wish we'd gotten more characterization/more of their bond#like obviously the book was from katniss's perspective so she's not going to like give us deep several chapter biographies of the otherkids#but nevertheless it feels like we lost out on such amazing characters that would complement each other so well#especially (but not necessarily) as a romantically compatible ship#them also having known each other before the games/being lovers is unlikely but I can see how they might partially fall for one another#and become attracted to each other as they let themselves bond#the hunger games#clato#cato x clove#anna speaks#cato#clove
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i think about the whole "love that" exchange a lot.
#i think i already have a post about this somewhere im just. rotating it#they realize they just kinda revealed a bit too much in front of Trent Crimm (Formerly) The Independent#and he does the whole biting wind-up to a question you know is going to be sharp as hell. bringing in that heat#and rebecca just. doesn't even try to get out of it#is she taking a leap of faith? is she just tired of spinning a whole yarn? testing him? giving him a chance?#and his response is just. simple. a real smile--almost conspiratorial and they're both in on the joke--and 'love that.'#sincere and almost warm. love that. bc that's what he actually thinks. not asking what he thinks he should#what he thinks the crowd wants to hear. but just. god her ex husband is a dickhead. absolutely you should try to fuck him over. love that#and rebecca all but beaming at him in response#i wish we'd gotten more of their dynamic tbh. i think that interaction probably helped soothe any anxieties she had about the whole thing#i think the next time we really see them interact is just the girl talk thing#where she's gleefully including him on the gossip and he's SO fucking pleased to get a good grade in girl talk something both normal to w#but like them developing an almost easy banter Fast. please. and like. him letting himself be. himself. in front of other people#not just ted. and rebecca GETS that if anyone gets getting flayed by the lasso effect it's her#so like. IDK MAN I JUST THINK THEY SHOULD BOND#also keeley. DEFINITELY keeley. all three of them. FUCK#trent crimm#rebecca welton#gertspeak#god. him being so pleased about the girl talk comment too. lives in my brain rent free#rebecca or keeley pays him a genuine but offhand compliment and he (and clearly completely unconsciously) just#fully does a pleased little wiggle in his seat. and they're like hmmmm
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not my dad not liking moral orel season 3 🤭🤭🤭that's so embarrassing for him (<- he's not wrong for feeling that way but i think it's like 60% because he doesn't like it when art gets weird and that's so so tragic for him)
#i actually think his points make sense this time. which tbqh is not normally how i feel when he criticizes smth i love#basically he was like s3 was a completely different show from the first two seasons#and he didn't like how all over the place and directionless it felt#and honestly yeah ok i can see that#personally i think the choice to broaden the focus to moralton broadly vs mostly just orel is really interesting#and it allows for different facets of their critique of fundie waspisms to extend to situations/characters orel wouldn't really be privy to#(could you imagine 'alone' with orel there? me neither)#and i personally liked them fleshing out the marginal characters. i never found that boring or like a major diversion#again they're like 11 min episodic(ish) things it's hard for them to feel like they drag on y'know#it shows a lot of ambition and i think they pulled it off really well tbh (cancellation aside)#but i will agree that the transition is a little sudden. nature is such a big moment for the series#and for orel's arc specifically but then we spend little time with orel post-nature so the tone shift doesn't#necessarily align with his realization (at least in terms of the canon timeline. ep release order does align)#it's sudden but we jump back to before the shattering. it's disorienting and i think it's kind of cool as hell#a realization like orel's in nature is gonna throw the past into question and color his life and thus the town#(bc let's face it orel is the real mayor of moralton kfhsjs) and while we've been seeing Some of moralton's ugliness#in every episode until now it's shown in full force in and post-nature (release-wise). so when the timeline jumps around#and it all feels twisted and hazy and sickening and it All Comes Back To The Hunting Trip as our point of reference#for when things are happening it makes it feel like the trip Caused this disturbance. it's almost a spatio-temporal THING#like orel IS the center of this universe. my point is it's weird and i like it a lot i think it works#but anyway i think s3 is a natural evolution of s1+2 albeit an accelerated one#and i really wish we'd gotten to see more of what s3 morel was cooking bc it was setting up some really cool stuff imo#like he hated everything w mommy censordoll x clay but it's SUCH a cool place to take their characters. freud would go crazy#moral orel#and i think if they knew where they had to end the season maybe focusing on other characters was a way to keep orel stagnant enough to like#end the finale where they needed him. maybe.#we actually DID finish it yesterday. i rewatched the finale the day before bc i was impatient but yeah 👍#now it's chapter black time >:}
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mirror world and gates of warp are such beloved anipoke moments for me. like they're so much more fun in japanese than in english because of the speech patterns of the characters........but none of those changes combined is beating whatever the writers were doing when they had alternate world goh call himself ore-sama unironically
#taylor.txt#taylor watches anipoke#i think it's because like...all the other changes are fairly predictable#except for chloe and goh who are just like. a hilariously comedic duo#wish we'd gotten to see more of them lmao#gates of warp > mirror world bc chloe and goh are just funny as opposed to clemont and serena bullying ash jdfgjhfkd#i like mirror world bonnie tho her formal speech is kind of adorable actually#one of these days i will sit down and pull the gates of warp episode apart tho bc its so ???#like the mirror world is a clear opposites situation but gates of warp...idk. it's way more alternate universe in no clear direction#everything moved slightly to the left throwing the whole timeline into disarray kinda thing
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None of this is changing how hype I am for NiF 3, which will apparently feature Wu Lei in some capacity.
#this rewatch really got me on the langya family front#i honestly wish we'd gotten more time with lin chen#mr who the fuck is lin shu himself#very fun contrast to jingyan#also I think if Jingyan had the chance to really see him with mcs he would die a thousand deaths#not even jealous just devastated#happy lin shu had a life and a person he could confide in a trust and uno#look after a kid with#who can offer him a life of freedom and adventure#and a dad who looks after him instead of uno. trying to murder him a bunch#agony! agony to see someone who looks at his beloved from the other side#don't worry baby u r all equal in his eyes#like in the eleventh hour we think woah is there someone mcs loves as an equal who doesn't need to be lied to and managed#whose devotion he doesn't run from? who he can stand to be honest with?#and then at the twelfth hour it's just like: nah#people who love lin shu love a dead man I need to be inviolate and untainted with what I've become#people who love Mei Changsu simply have bad taste and will be excited to meet my old self#who I can stand to inhabit for the purpose of dying#idk idk I really do just want him to sort his shit out#but I do think it's interesting that even in the happiest of endings#he can't be lin chen's wanderer and nihuang's husband and Jingyan's it's complicated all at once#pick two and it can't be lin chen and jingyan#the rancid polycule vibes of the previous generation are absolutely chasing them#consort jing like: love flourishes in unexpected places. build it where you can. and then there is my husband#objectively my worst and least favourite companion
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Forever thankful that Yaz's character arc, evident from her very first scenes, was sacrosanct the whole way through the era.
#dw shit#i am actually furious people are acting like yaz's main goal was 13#how reductive to what happens on screen#there is a difference between wishing things had played out differently and#wishing we'd gotten more#and just erasing all these other angles to Yaz's arc to make it out she got nothing she wanted or didn't develop like#we didn't see her grow up from unsure teen to a woman confident in her goals life And sexuality#i would have liked more too but. yikes.
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so tired. can i please just go home.
#sobered up from my daydrinking. im so tired#really wish i couldve gotten a nap in between jobs but whatever ig#tmrws gonna be fun 🙄 i hate saturdays man i cant wait to Not work them anymore#also in my friend gc. some other stuff then 'could we all hang out?' so i said wdym? bc of what we were talking ab i was confused#between all hanging out vs not. which i thought we'd all hang out Anyway. and the guy that sent the message READ MINE. so im still#confused :/ idk if i like this dude anyway he repeatedly uses the wrong pronouns for me and our other mutual friend (who i also kinda#dont like bc they Still havent paid me back for their drinks when their card wouldnt read at the bar. shame on me i guess)#whatever dude! im stressed out enough already i cannot let work get to me as much as it does. i just cant anymore. whatever.#3 more hours........ send help <3#talk tag
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French Kisses 💋
Pairings | L&DS!Rafayel x fem. reader
Genre | ☁️fluff, 💋smut
Word Count | 3.3k
Warnings | ⚠️ minors DNI ⚠️ established relationship, Dom!Rafayel. Sub!reader, nude painting, tipsy sex, nipple play, teasing, thigh riding, dry humping, vaginal fingering, bigdick!Rafayel, riding, use of Evol, squirting, creampie, fem. receiving oral, cum eating, aftercare 🤧, cute couple
🔖 m.list♡
a/n ; oml- idk why but like this has just been a scene replaying in my head so I had to share this with you guys! Thank you everyone who participated in the poll! Long awaited but 'tis here 💜 stay tuned for my Zylus series that I have planned, so excited 😆 hope you 'njoy! c;
"I want to paint you like my little French girl."
I blink up at Rafayel, my confused gaze meeting his of purple mirth.
“I’m- huh?”
Agreeing to come over to Rafayel’s I never know what to expect only that I’m definitely gonna have my hands full. Of all things, I didn’t expect my boyfriend to suggest nude painting.
“My pretty French-“
“Well, I heard you. I just mean- are you implying what I think?” He’s so close it’s hard to hide the heat rising to my cheeks. A beautiful smile graces his lips, showing off his perfect denture.
“I certainly don’t intend to draw you with a baguette-ow! Baby what was that for?” Rafayel rubs the side of his pec I’d pinched with a slight pout. A very cute pout.
“You freaky frog!”
“Am not!” I raise an eyebrow at him. “It truly is for artistic purposes but-“ He leans back down over me, caging me against the soft orange leather.
The bluish purple hue of the night makes his pretty, pale skin all the more ethereal. His eyes shine even more so when he looks at me; something I noticed from countless failed “studying” attempts which ends in me gazing at him as he paints.
“-I do also think you’d look absolutely stunning on my canvas.” He’s close enough for our noses to touch now. My breath comes up short as I’m stuck staring once again. The moonlight must be a paid actor along with the wind brushing his soft locks across our foreheads.
His breath smells fruity thanks to the amazing fresh assortment we'd gotten earlier in the day- that and the wine.
"You're drunk." I try to deflect, unsure about posing nude yet excited to be admired by Rafayel. A part of me is also curious as to what he sees, what he thinks is beautiful. What about me is so beautiful?
"You wish." He leans back into his position with his leg tucked beneath him as the other brushes the floor.
"I am." I'm not entirely but it's definitely enough to have me consider this. Seeing him in his element from time to time, Rafayel is a beast and a true creator at heart. Most pieces he's passionate about he takes the most time with. Others he could pump out by the dozen.
"Ah-ha! I knew this was a great buy. The guy in the market was on his game but I was skeptical."
"Raf, you always give in to the market sellers." I snort.
"Always? I don't- okay maaaaybe I do but in good faith! I believe they should keep at it, we all have to start somewhere." Rafayel crosses his arms dramatically and I hug my knees tighter, grinning like an idiot. "What's so funny?"
"Hm? Oh- nothing's funny just. . ."
"Just?"
"I'll do it." His eyes widen and he's analyzing for a moment, bracing himself for my fit of giggles and a "gotcha!" but that doesn't come. Instead I stare right into his deep ocean eyes and slowly his face relaxes and the corner of his lips tilt upwards.
"Truly? Ahh.. This makes me so happy. You're my perfect muse, baby." Rafayel leans forward onto his knees again to press a kiss to my lips so abruptly I have no chance to reciprocate. "Let me get everything prepared, yeah? I want you in the sunroom."
The sunroom.
Rafayel's most favorite place to paint. He has beautiful floor to ceiling windows that stretch around the dome shaped room that extends to the roof. Everything is visible there, the beautiful sunrise and sunset that bleeds into the starry night. I'm sure his reasoning is for the sake of lighting because he has a selection of colors or perhaps it's the full moon he wants to take advantage of. Part of me hopes it's because I'm just as precious as his work he keeps locked away there.
He emerges from the hallway after a while and he looks so excited that a fresh wave of anxiety and thrill envelops me.
“Come, Darling. It’s time.” I stand and walk into his open palm.
“Y/N look at me.”
I tear my gaze away from the beautiful set Rafayel clearly took his time planning. Instead of the glass windows as a backdrop against the red plush sofa, Rafayel has set up velvet curtains in a deep blue shade. Pretty jewels hang from the top creating a glittering effect with the help of the moon shining down.
I meet his eyes and he smiles, reaching a hand up to brush his thumb below my right eye. “Hi beautiful. You’re looking nervous.”
“Don’t tease. I’m super nervous.”
“Don’t be. It’s me. I’ve seen you in all your beauty already.”
“I know, I know but not like this. You’ll be staring at me for hours.”
“I also already do that.”
“Raf-“
“Baby, please. Don’t overthink this. I promise I won’t just have you pose there in that pretty head of yours. I’m here with you, yeah?” I release a shaky breath.
“Yeah, okay. Okay, let’s do this.” Rafayel’s smile reaches his eyes and he presses a gentle kiss to my forehead before stepping back a foot.
“Now, allow me to unwrap my canvas.” He tucks his finger under my black muscle tank and his chilly finger leaves goosebumps in its wake. As he removes it over my head, revealing my bare breast, he presses kisses to my face then along my arms then across the top of my breast as the cloth drops to the floor.
“Raf don’t-ah~” He ignores me and latches onto a nipple, sucking softly, as both his large hands perk them up. Once he’s satisfied he frees them and stands to his full height over me, tucking a finger into the waistband of my leggings.
“I believe you can handle this, right?” His lips are blushed and slick from his saliva, a beautiful sight paired with the look in his eyes.
I nod, not trusting my voice to stabilize itself while I remove both my leggings and cotton panties to meet my tank. I should thank the Moon and stars above that I decided to randomly shave this morning.
Under Rafayel's gaze I can't help a bit of shyness but his words will always lift me into security. "The most beautiful human I've ever laid eyes on." What a way to single me out.
"Thank you." He holds out his arms and I step into his embrace. His soft fingertips start at my shoulders, massaging gently, then he moves them down the sides of my breast to my waist. He digs into my love handles with a small groan while he leans down into my neck.
"Wow, wow, wow. . .I'm the luckiest fishie ever."
"Mmhm, my fishie."
"Glub glub." He playfully nibbles under my ear making me squeal into the fabric on his shoulder. "All yours, cutie."
He provides me much needed space to breathe and get my bearings before jumping his bones by leading me at the hand to the love seat. I take a seat, blinking up at him awaiting instruction.
"Lie down on your side for me. Mhm, perfect- now relax onto your left palm- no other way, yes good girl. Stop biting your lip, freaky frog. Now let the other hand rest over your tummy just above your hip, yesss yes. Okay now stay still."
Rafayel is true to his word and through the whole process of finding his colors and creating a sketch he entertains me with countless stories and small talk. He allows me a break every so often as he obsesses over an area to avoid my limbs from going numb.
Although I wouldn't mind going numb in another sense.
"I lost you." His words halt my thoughts before they could venture further but he doesn't seem upset or in a rush to continue as he sets aside his brush. "Am I starting to bore you?"
"No, of course not my love. I get easily distracted, you know this. I'm sorry, what did you say?" I feel slightly guilty but he just seems amused.
"Being under my watchful eyes doing things to you?"
"Mmm, a little." I pick up the wine glass from the floor, taking another sip as I eye him over the rim. "Staring at your muse isn't doing things to you?"
Rafayel stands up and walks over to me, one hand tucked into his pants while the other reaches out a finger to tap the rim of my glass. I place it back down onto the floor and sit up straight. He brushes the hair spilled over my shoulder back to expose my chest again then squats down, pressing a kiss where my neck and shoulder meets.
"It's doing many things. . .My line art came out perfect, my passion came easy." I meet his eyes as I lift a hand to guide him by the cheek into a kiss, the first actual kiss of the night.
“Ah- my lipstick. Sorry baby.” I wipe his bottom lip but it just smudges into his skin.
“Don’t be. Paint me too, my love.”
I smile big, surely looking like a smitten fool as I lean in and press a cherry kiss to his cheek. I instinctively wipe it, smudging the corners of the print while Rafayel leans in for another kiss.
He guides me onto my back as he inches his way onto the couch with me, keeping our lips connected in a heated lock of lip biting. “Open..” his finger taps my chin and I open, allowing his tongue inside to dance against mine.
Rafayel pushes his thigh into my core, his clothes rough against my pussy but the friction heaven sent. I moan into his mouth and he eagerly drinks them up as he rocks into me. I feel his growing erection against my inner thigh and I try to reach a hand down to feel him heavy in my palm but he stops me, gripping my wrists together with one hand.
He breaks the kiss and I chase his mouth, releasing a puff of air as he leans further away. Rafayel chuckles, showing off his canines. “I like you like this. Panting for me, look at you.” His voice almost coos and it makes me a bit self aware, blushing under his gaze.
“Stop teasing,” Half of me is saying that while the lower part of me wants him to continue. Rafayel has never given me a night without utter bliss, falling apart at his hands (and mouth) multiple times a night with the stamina infused in him. He truly isn’t human.
"I'm not though. You look so beautiful like this. . ." He brushes stray hair from my face. "Hair in its natural state, makeup fading, skin soft." He digs his equally soft hand into my thigh and I open wider for him.
"Raf, please. I need you."
"I know sweet girl, I'm not gonna deny you." I give him a look. "Nor will I tease, I promise. I just want a last look at you." He trails his ring clad fingers down the side of my cheek to the base of my throat, squeezing gently, then ends his journey at my breast. He pinches my nipple, making me intake air, choking up on my moan.
His head dips down and follows the sting with his warm mouth and tongue while his hand continues down my body to where I want him most. Rafayel runs his middle finger along my lips, gently pushing past each time he strokes upwards until he brushes my clit.
"Oh~" My eyes fall shut as I turn my face into my bicep, clasping my hands together as I fight against my body wanting to shake and squirm under his touch. A rush of adrenaline courses through my veins turning them hot the more pressures he applies.
Rafayel looks up at me over the plump of my chest, releasing my blushed nipple with a wet pop. He adds his ring finger in with his middle as he dips into my wetness again then brings his soaked fingers up to slip into his mouth.
He moans with a mouthful. "So sweet." He licks his lips as he withdraws his fingers to bring them back down to my open legs only this time he gently applies pressure to my opening with precision. With the right amount of pressure, and an angle he knows well, his fingers easily slide in and he curls them.
"Deeper," I gasp and take advantage of his hand around my wrist loosening to reach down and grasp his long sleeve. Rafayel groans as he rolls his hips harder into my thigh, fingers sliding deeper until the cold silver around his fingers touch my warm insides.
"Fuck, you're so hot, Y/N." Rafayel is breathy in my ear as his hand slides into my own, grasping tightly, as he forces his hips away before he blows his load in his pants. His fingers keep their pace while he kisses along my temple and cheek. "Doing so good, baby. I feel you, you're close. Aren't you?"
The rasp and need in his voice is enough to help me reach my peak, walls clenching sporadically as he sneaks in a third finger to attempt to match his girth. My orgasm rips through me, nerve endings feeling like sparks as I clutch him to ground myself.
"Yes, let me hear that beautiful voice sing. My little Siren." Rafayel removes his fingers and smears my cum along my body, hands moving as if it's a paintbrush in gentle strokes. I follow his hand while he watches my face, scrunched and flushed in pleasure as I moan softly.
Rafayel smiles to himself and leans down to press a kiss to my lips then his large hands slips underneath my arms to switch our positions to me straddling his hips. I brace myself with my hands on his shoulders as I keep my hips lifted while he works his pants and briefs off.
"I couldn't stop thinking about you riding me. You look so beautiful on top." He kicks his pants to the side, hands rubbing my ass and squeezing as he lowers me down against his dick. He's fully erect and his tip is red, probably angry from the dry humping. Rafayel moans as he slides his dick through my lips and against my clit, teasing us both from the sensitivity.
"Raf~ ah!" Before I could complain he lines himself up and drags me down till our pelvis meets. The first thrust is way too deep in this position taking all eight inches of him. I jerk upwards, top of my feet resting over his thighs to help push myself. "Wait- fuck, ah please~"
Rafayel tries to help with rubbing my tummy with one hand and the other resting on my ass. "You can control it baby," I breathe a sigh of relief. "For now."
I ignore him, too lost in the growing pleasure as I rise and fall, only taking half of what he has to offer. It's more than enough with his girth filling me and it seems to satisfy him as well. Moving his hand from my stomach he guides my breast towards him, sucking my nipple with deep moans as he plays with the other.
"Thank you, thank you." I cry out in pleasure against his hair as I hug his head close, arching my back as my hips speed up taking another inch.
"No, thank you my sweet Y/N." A litter of kisses to my breast. "You're so beautiful, riding me so well... Take more for me? Please?"
I pull away, looking down at his hazed over eyes full of adoration and lust. Rafayel isn't known for his patience, especially when it comes to pleasure. While he doesn't rush, his hips certainly doesn't do slow. He has the stamina of a bunny at times and cause of that he's the only man to ever make me squirt.
The first time it'd happened he was stuck staring in awe while I was extremely embarrassed having not warned him. He assured me it was nothing to be ashamed of and he's been hell bent on making it happen any chance he gets.
Perhaps tonight.
I give in and slide down another inch, walls fluttering around him. He releases a breathy moan and his wavy hair sticking to his forehead makes him look so sinful and-
“Pretty boy~ ‘m gonna come again- ack! Gentle baby, so sensitive right now.” Rafayel giggles around my nipple he’d just bit into then presses a kiss as an apology.
“One more and you’ll surely be able to take all of me, cutie.” He litters kisses all along my jaw and neck as his hands roam my spine and ass. My pace slows as I inch closer to pleasure, angling my hips to have his tip nudge my g-spot.
“Fuuuck yes!” I squeeze Rafayel’s girth as I come, whimpering and moaning into his hair as he quickly works my clit like a DJ. I grip his wrist to halt his pace but he fights against me until he gets exactly what he wants. “Raf no~” A pornographic whiny moan bounces against the glass panes as my body shakes almost violently while I squirt all over his toned abs.
“Oh- sh-shit.” Rafayel takes advantage of my walls loosening in its relaxed state and slides me down to meet his balls, tip aching to breach my cervix. He knocks the air from my lungs and damn near my consciousness.
I feel my body start to slump when suddenly I feel coolness near my lower tummy. I look down through teary lashes and Rafayel has activated his Evol. Beautiful baby blue tendrils swirling through my cum, collecting it to create a raspberry shape then it floats into his open mouth. His eyes flash purple.
My eyes are wide, face blushing red at the sight and he just smirks.
“Mmm, my favorite taste. You’re so sweet."
"You-"
"I?"
"You just-"
"I- I-" Rafayel chuckles while I pout from his teasing, reaching out to grab the back of my neck to pull me in closer. "Take just a little more for me, Darling. Yeah?"
I nod weakly with our foreheads pressed together as he shifts my upper body weight onto his, holding my ass suspended in place to thrust up into. I keep my eyes on his, feeling every emotion swirling in his orbs. My walls slowly grow tighter with each increasing thrust into a new pace and his grunts come more frequent.
I whine at the oversensitivity getting to me while wrapped around his neck using him as a lifeline. Muscles aching, clit throbbing, nipples brushing, deep thrust send us both into an orgasm- mind numbing for me.
When consciousness finally finds me again I'm on my back in our bed with Rafayel between my legs "cleaning" me up. Really he's just being a freaky frog, slurping both our releases past his pouty lips.
"Raf~ baby please- no more." I moan the words out but Rafayel knows to call it quits with a last long lick towards my clit. He grins up at me and kisses it then trails kisses up my body, now dressed in a violet silk slip, to press a bunch of pecks all over my neck.
We roll around in a giggly fit until Rafayel cages me in his bare biceps, using a bit of strength to keep me still. I look up at him and his eyes are so soft matching his smile. Using his arm that isn't holding me, he raises his hand to brush his thumb across the bridge of my nose, cheeks then lips before leaning in.
"I love you so much, my Y/NN."
"I love you mostest, my Sea God."
I relax further into his hold feeling my sleepiness begin to creep in as he presses gentle kisses to my lips before angling my jaw to slip past my lips with his tongue. I can't remember the defining moment of falling asleep but fresh on my mind when I awake is French kisses.
#sinstae#love and freakspace#l&ds#l&ds rafayel#lads#lads rafayel#love and deepspace#love and deepspace rafayel#l&ds smut#l&ds fluff#l&ds x reader#lads smut#lads fluff#lads x reader#love and deepspace smut#love and deepspace rafayel smut#love and deepspace rafayel fluff#l&ds rafayel smut#l&ds rafayel fluff#love and deepspace x reader#lads rafayel smut#lads rafayel fluff
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things i would have loved in season 2 (that I may have to write myself now)
niko reuniting with the boys (especially Edwin)
more Charles and Niko interactions! bc i would love to see the group split up and niko and charles come up with some off the wall insane plan (that somehow works????)
by the same logic more Crystal and Edwin team up, but most of their investigating is them snarking at each other (I need a bitch off between them, I need it like I need air, please give me the 'bitchy-annoyed-siblings-vibe!')
the crew trying out different names for the night nurse and her slowly losing it more and more each time.
jenny getting to go on a date that maybe isn't a murderer???
Charles obviously realizing his feelings for Edwin, but immediately moves into jealous territory. double points if it is over someone/something that he literally doesn't even have to worry about.
more of the sprints being assholes. even for just a moment.
the cat king showing up and just being the wet cat he was at the end of the season (all 'hey edwin, what's up, noooo i'm not lonely look at me!')
there's a million more things but god, do i wish we'd gotten some of these
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the Mayu Iwatani appreciation zine is so sweet 😭 and he gave it to me for free with my other stuff because we chatted abt how much we both like her....
picked up the most absolutely insane wrestling zines at the fest we tabled at yesterday btw. still losing my mind over it. artist is narcisoespiritu on ig.
#peace and love on planet wrestle#our tables were right next to each other i wish we'd gotten to talk more but it was just busy enough that our conversation abt All In died
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On my second watch through of Race to the Edge, and man, could you imagine if we'd gotten a villain like Viggo instead of Drago in HTTYD2? Like, instead of this big dumb brute who just wants power (that essentially is no different than the other types of vikings that Hiccup deals with every day), if Hiccup actually had an intellectual opponent who gave him a run for his money (and hell, maybe even some moral challenges?)
(don't talk to me about Grimmel, i know technically he was like that but Hiccup had 0 braincells in httyd3 and just overall this household is a zero httyd3 tolerance household, thank you. Also Viggo has way more charisma than Grimmel)
RTTE has its faults but overall the good moments in the show are REALLY good, and I love how they did Viggo - I just wish he were in something with a higher budget T0T
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Afterwards, they do a race. They don’t talk about it, but it’s there, between them still. Something settled between them. Cleo doesn’t know how to say it; they never know how to say things like this. Still, they need to, so they wait until Ren’s race is over and then hike through the jungle to go sit on top of Etho’s base and wait for him to show up as well.
He doesn’t. He’d gone to their base. Instead of just showing up for each other, they have to somewhat awkwardly coordinate over text which base to meet at. It forces everything to feel more real.
When they finally meet up, it’s in the shopping district, leaning against the button. A dangerous game in theory, but Cleo’s not fully convinced it can explode at this point, so.
Cleo breathes. They’re both quiet for a moment.
"Okay, so like, are we doing this?" Cleo says.
"I don’t really know, uh, what this is," Etho says, "but I… care about you. I think. So I think we’re doing that."
Cleo nods once. "You know I don’t fall in love, right? I’m not going to fall in love with you, I don’t do that. Might say something about loving you, but it’s not the same thing. Different sense of the word. It’s different, loving people and falling in love, got it? And I won’t do that second thing. I’m never going to do that second thing. I don’t--"
"Okay. I know," Etho says.
"Do you?" Cleo asks.
"I mean, not entirely, but I’m frankly surprised we’re having this conversation in the first place. I never expected you to be in love with me."
"But I’m not," Cleo says. "I’m attracted to you, and I love you as like, a companion and friend or whatever, but I’m not in love with you. I’m. Ugh. I wish I knew the right words. I just--I also don’t let go of things so if we’re doing this you’re going to have to get used to that real fast. Me not being in love with you but me not letting you go, both of those things."
"You're attracted to me? Aw, Cleo," Etho says.
"Don't be an ass," Cleo says.
"Sorry, sorry. It's just, geez, this is--a heavy conversation, huh?"
Cleo sighs. "We'll work on the deflection."
Etho rubs the back of his head and looks away. "Uh, in that case. If I'm maybe a little in love with you--"
"I can't--I can't reciprocate that, Etho," Cleo says, and their voice cracks as they do.
"I know," Etho says. "I just want to make sure it's okay, then."
"You can't help that, can you? Just like I can't help that I still sort of want to kill anyone who hurts you."
Etho seems to think about it for a while. Cleo resists the urge to fidget. She's a zombie. She shouldn't have the urge to fidget; she should be too dead for that. Besides, it's hardly like it's a secret she doesn't fall in love, exactly. It's just... it's only relevant sometimes. Feeling like, as she watches Etho and Bdubs dance around each other, she's on the outside looking in. She'd kill to hold their hands, to protect them, hell, even to kiss them--but that's different. She just can't summon the same emotion of... she doesn't know.
Martyn had almost gotten it, for all he didn't get anything else, in the end. Scott was never going to fall in love with her in the first place, for obvious reasons. Whatever attraction she and Pearl have going on, it's definitely not love.
But this...
"Okay," Etho says.
"That's it?" Cleo says.
"I mean, does it need to be anything else?" Etho says. "It's not like we can just... not do this. I think it's too late for that. Whatever 'this' is. I'm in love, and you aren't, but we'd both be pretty upset to lose this, right? So I'll... figure it out."
Cleo swallows. They feel small. "Will you? Do you understand?"
Etho shrugs. "I understand that it's you, and it's you that this happened with, not anyone else."
"Okay," Cleo says. "Okay."
"Is it okay if I kiss you? Just to try it, I mean. Not like, as a--this is a bad time, actually, I don't want to try to make any kissing we do romantic, I mean, you just told me this won't be romantic, I--"
"Yeah, sure, you can kiss me," Cleo says, and he leans in to kiss them. It's nice. A little soft for what they'd want, really, but nice. He leans back. He looks them in the eyes.
"I get it a little more now."
Cleo is baffled. "How? Kissing is just like, a thing we did? How does that have anything to do with any of the rest of this."
Etho laughs. "I definitely get it a little more now. What do you want to tell the others? I know they're definitely gossiping."
"Ugh. Can we just, like, not?" Cleo says. "I don't want to have to explain it."
"I'll just be confusing then, got it," Etho says, and Cleo can't help but laugh themselves.
"This is why you're my favorite," Cleo says, and they think maybe this will work out okay, after all.
#secret life smp#trafficshipping#hermitshipping#a bee fic#cletho#zombiecleo#ethoslab#yeah this one is ALSO pretty overtly shipping even though it’s also overtly aromantic#idk man. definitions are blurry. lines are blurry. I’d call this shipping even if it’s not about being in love.#anyway. bi aro cleo is a headcanon I’m increasingly attached to so I thought I’d write this for yall.#don’t know how to explain it more than. I think it suits them.#I know this is out of my wheelhouse but I felt like I wanted it out there yeah?#anyway I’LL GO BACK TO THE FANON SWAP PROMPTS SOON JUST NEEDED THIS WRITTEN FIRST
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I Wish That It Could Be Like That
Summary: An affair with Harry has taken its toll and is no longer enough.
Warnings: angst, infidelity - please don't read if this is a trigger for you
Word Count: 1824
A/N: Written in 2017, inspired by "Secret Love Song, Pt. II" by Little Mix. This is in first person, but the woman's name is not mentioned.
"Have you seen my ring?" asked Harry, standing in the doorway of the bathroom.
"Which ring?" I sat up, stopping in the middle of buckling the straps on my shoes. My breath caught in my throat. Oh, Shit!
"This one," Harry held up his left hand, but pointed at the middle finger with his right.
"Oh," I sighed. "Thank God, I thought you meant..."
"No," he shook his head. "No, I don't-" His words stilled in his mouth and he swallowed hard.
"You don't what?" I raised a brow.
"I don't...wear that one. When I'm with you."
"Oh." I released a breath and grabbed my other shoe, stopping once again. "That's not true. You had it on the other day."
"When?" Harry crossed the room to inspect the dresser.
"At the dinner par-"
Harry nodded at me in the mirror, recognizing my acknowledgment. There had been people at that dinner party who knew her. Who knew them as a couple. I'd had to pretend, playing another one of his friends who just happened to be at the party, and not his date. I was a great actress. No one was the wiser. No one knew our secret.
We had to hide, Harry and me. It wasn't easy, and to be honest after three months, it had started to take its toll on me. In the beginning it was merely a physical attraction we shared. We didn't mean for it to happen. No one ever does. Over time it had started to develop into something more, at least on my part, and I had reason to believe he felt the same. However, he belonged to someone else.
I always only referred to her as her. I couldn't bring myself to use the term wife. Occasionally her name rolled off my tongue, tasting of shame and self-disgust. It wasn't that I had any issues with her. As a person, she was fine, lovely even. It was just that she had something I wanted. She had his last name. She had him.
And for that reason alone, I hated her.
I bit my lip as I tied on my other shoe. Harry passed me as we walked around the bed, still searching for his missing ring.
"There it is," he half giggled when he lifted the pillow. I returned the grin he gave me as he slid the ring onto his finger.
"C'mon, love," he said, holding out his hand to me. "Let's go."
We drove to a night club just outside the city, one that a mutual acquaintance, whom knew nothing of our affair, had casually mentioned in conversation. I felt relief in knowing that we wouldn't be recognized, happy to spend a fun-filled evening as a couple in someplace other than my apartment or a hotel room.
Harry held my hand for the entire drive, absent-mindedly rubbing his thumb across my knuckles and rings, occasionally lifting our joined hands to kiss the back of mine. I sat back in my seat, a contented smile on my face as I listened to him humming along to the radio.
I hadn't told him yet, but I was in love with him. I'd decided that day, that morning while I was getting dressed, or maybe brushing my teeth as I thought of his smile, his laugh, his voice...the way we fit together. It was so obvious, I had to laugh at myself. Every piece of him just fit perfectly.
Harry walked around the car to open my door like a gentleman, and again held the door open when we arrived at the entrance of the club. He gently guided me inside with his hand on the small of my back as we walked up to the bar to give our drink orders. We'd only gotten halfway through our first cocktails when a song we both loved began to play. Without a word, Harry set down his glass and pulled me onto the dance floor.
The bass zig-zagged through my veins as we danced, pumping loud and causing the floor to feel like it was made of rubber as we bounced to the beat. I raised my arms above my head like a fan at a concert as I sang along and twirled in a circle at Harry's feet, making him beam his million-watt smile.
With not nearly enough alcohol in my system yet, Harry agreed to sit the next song out and return to the bar for more drinks. This time we grabbed a couple shots, letting the golden liquor loosen any stiff joints and muscles. I watched Harry sway his hips to the next song as I sipped on a glass of water, eager to join him on the dance floor once again.
I giggled at the pure joy he exuded when he placed his hands on my hips and shifted them back and forth to get me to dance. He was obviously having a great time, and that itself made me happy.
We danced a couple more songs, both of us getting hot and sweaty. Then an oldie from the 70s started to play, a more mid-tempo track with a sexy groove. I gave Harry a wink as I began to dance closer to him, my fingers lightly teasing the opening of his shirt, tickling the unfastened buttons.
I loved the way he was looking at me. His eyes sparkled in the dim light, the green darker than usual. He didn't have to say a word. I knew what he was feeling, because I was feeling it too.
I knew I wasn't supposed to. Every warning he'd ever given me replayed in my head as I stood on my tip toes. I didn't care. I needed his lips on mine. I wound my arms around his neck, my chin tilted, awaiting his kiss.
But it didn't happen. Instead, Harry unwrapped my arms from his neck, squeezing my hands before letting them fall between us. His jaw set, he shook his head.
"No, baby," he whispered.
Though his tone was firm, like a parent scolding a child, I knew I detected a bit of regret and sorrow. Or perhaps that was just my own wishful thinking.
"Please."
"We can't. I've told you."
"No one knows us here, Harry."
His brows furrowed, the crinkle above his nose deeper than ever, he shook his head once more and turned toward the bar. I stood in my spot, my feet unable to move. My chest shook as I began to sob internally, careful not to let any tears roll down my face. Finally, I was able to walk, following Harry where he stood at the end of the bar.
"Take me home," I mumbled.
"What?" he turned to me.
"I'd like to leave," I declared, my bottom lip trembling. "Drive me home, please."
"We only got here..." his eyes shifted around the room. "It's early."
"Fine," I argued. "I'll find my own way."
Pushing past him, I made it outside, my heels clicking on the pavement and down the sidewalk. I pulled out my phone to call a cab just as Harry caught up with me.
"What are you doing?"
"Getting a ride," I answered, my fingers tapping anxiously on the screen.
"Don't be like this, love. We've been through this."
"Harry, not one fucking soul in that bar knows you're marr-" I couldn't say the word. It tasted awful on my tongue and made me nauseous. "That I'm not yours."
"Baby..." He stepped closer, but still didn't reach for me. The few inches between us might as well had been a million miles. "You are mine."
"Am I? Because I don't feel like it."
Harry remained silent, the only sound his breath as he exhaled through his nose. I felt the tears form in my eyes again and I blinked, desperate to hold them back.
"You won't even touch me now," I whispered in a shaky voice.
"I...I want to..."
I shook my head, the first lone tear trickling down my cheek. "Just take me home. Please."
Dropping his head, Harry dug his keys out of his pocket. I followed him to the car and climbed inside when he held the door open. The noise rang in my ears when he shut it, like the sound of a pinball dropping down the chute, much like the clanging of a phantom beat in my empty heart.
As he drove, the silence was deafening. I couldn't stop the tears anymore. They came rolling down my face like a waterfall. My chest shook with heavy breaths. I couldn't look at him, so I just stared out the window and watched the headlights and street lamps go by.
"I'm sorry," Harry finally spoke.
I sniffled, still unable to turn my head. "I don't wanna hide anymore," I mumbled through sobs.
I could hear him swallow, hear the sound of his hand running across the steering wheel. He cleared his throat.
"I wanna be able to be seen with you," I continued. "I want to be able to kiss you. Why can't we be like that?"
"We...we just...we can't."
"Why not?" I cried, finally turning to face him. His face was lit by the dashboard light, but his expression was unreadable. "I love y-"
"Shh, baby, don't," he interrupted, reaching over the seat to grab my hand.
"Don't what? I can't help it, Harry! I'm in love with you! I want the world to know. I wanna shout it from the rooftops!"
Harry said nothing else for the rest of the ride home. I just sat in the passenger seat, staring at him, waiting and hoping desperately for him to speak. His hand still held mine as he pulled into the parking lot and stopped the car in front of my apartment. Releasing it slowly, he shifted the car into park and bowed his head.
"It's hopeless, isn't it?" I finally asked.
"It's...it's complicated, baby. You knew that from the beginning."
"You said I'm yours. Why is that complicated?"
"Because, it is," he glared at me.
"Because someone else is yours too. That's never gonna change, is it?"
Harry sighed, answering my question with that one gesture.
"I can't live this way, Harry. I've been hoping..." I shook my head, wiping another stream of tears. "No, I can't. I can't keep waiting. It'll never be enough."
"I'm sorry, baby," he said again. "I just can't give you what you're wanting right now."
"I know."
I leaned forward, placing my hand on his cheek. His eyelids fluttered as my lips met his and he kissed me back. One last kiss. A kiss goodbye. Forever.
Neither of us spoke. Instead, I opened my own car door and walked to my own front door, unlocking it as Harry backed out of the parking space. His taillights shone on my hardwood floor when I turned around and watched him drive away.
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MASTERLIST | KO-FI | FEEDBACK
#harry styles#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fan fiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fan fic#harry styles fic#harry styles one shot#harry styles blurb#harry styles drabble#harry styles imagine#harry styles writing#harry styles x reader#harry styles angst#harry styles au#harry fanfiction#harry fan fiction#harry fanfic#harry fan fic#harry fic#harry one shot#harry blurb#harry drabble#harry imagine#harry writing#harry x reader#harry angst#harry au
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I mostly love season 3 of ATLA, but I wish we'd gotten like, one or two more episodes of seeing Zuko as a new member of the gaang. He got some individual time with everyone (except Toph so sad. But even then their relationship was pretty established), but it would have been fun to see the completed Gaang fight some random threat so we could see how Zuko would work with all of them.
Like bring back one of the season one villains- I vote the pirates (though I guess they wouldn't be a credible threat on their own, so team them up with idk the rough rhinos or some new one-off threat). since that would lead to the most fun callbacks.
-Toph would be really mad that they fought pirates and never told her. Then she would be bitterly disappointed that the pirates weren't as cool as she thought they would be. She'd also be floored to hear Katara stole from the pirates and be like "how could you not tell me you did something that cool! Why did you think you needed to pull a scam when you could have just told me that and impressed me!"
-Katara would insist that Zuko be tied to the tree and used as bait for the bad guys at one point and Zuko would comply out of guilt.
-Zuko would have to explain that Zhao hired the pirates to kill him and they nearly succeeded when they blew up his ship.
and Aang would be like "Oh THAT'S why you were all beat up. I always assumed Katara did that."
Sokka: Yeah, I was sure Katara just punched you in the face a bunch and slashed you with some icicles.
Katara: awwww you guys!
Zuko: Why are you so flattered by that?
-Hawky could return solely to fight the parrot while Momo looks on approvingly. And maybe bond with Zuko a bit in a callback to the pilot.
-Katara could steal something else from the pirates. Just for kicks. With Toph's enthusiastic support. Suki too. Girls supporting girls committing larceny.
-Zuko and Katara accidentally cancel out each other's attacks at one point during the melee and get into an immature argument Aang has to break up
-The pirates ask where Iroh is or mention him and Zuko gets all misty like
"you were right, Uncle...I couldn't see that my own ship had set sail...I even threw his pai sho tile away...just another sin on my list..."
"Zuko please focus"
Maybe it would have disrupted the tension, but I would have loved to see those shenanigans happen.
#basically writing a fanfic here i guess#avatar the last airbender#zuko#toph#katara#aang#the problem is that all the season 3 eps are so good i wouldn't know which one to sacrifice for that extra one#nightmares and daydreams I guess? though I do think it's important to establish aangs under pressure#actually maybe I'd sacrifice a big chunk of the first part of the day of black sun. the fighting parts with the tanks were pretty boring
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Tessa fucks me up dude can I just talk about her for a sec? Yeah? Yeah.
She loved those drones. She loved them because they were what she had. She felt sympathy for them when nobody else did. And I like to think there was a little bit of loneliness motivating her as well.
Her mother hated her. She was nothing to her. When her mother scolded her by saying "seems you still can't follow simple orders" her respone was "No, no no! Please!" BEGGING. Begging her mother to believe in her and be kind to her. She got chained up in her room (multiple times btw. At leas tthats implied. the hand she winced at and rubbed is the same hand the chain was on, which means shed be chained up long enough for it to rub her skin painfully. long enough to leave lasting pain.)
She is very connected to these drones, to the point where she kept all the error drones aroud because she LOVED them. She spent time digging them up. HELL SHE TOOK A FAMILY PHOTO WITH THEM DUDE...
Even when Cyn was creepy and scary, she kept her around. She'd rather lock Cyn up than get rid of her. and when n points it out, shes apologetic and hesitant. But we know WHY she did that. Even if it was kind of a sucky move, it was because she didnt wanna have to throw cyn out. and in the end that killed her.
Also she knows J well enough to know what sets her off (enough to. bite the shit out of a chain). She knows them. and she loves them.
I wish we'd gotten to know more about her an N. why is he so clearly her favorite? but thats not relevant ig
also her saying "I've only ever yakked to robots, J!" She has NO human friends. she has nobody to support her other than these robots. these robots who get treated like garbage by her family.
and then she has to watch these robots turn on her. Not just THESE ROBOTS but the three that she loved most. (also im going off what wouldve happened in ep 5 WITHOUT uzi, where n doesnt get out of the swamp, and nobody goes down to the basement)
V first, then Cyn, then J. And we KNOW she loved these three+N especially bc she took a family photo w them, interacted with them more often, and generally just seemed much closer with them.
and what does she get for it? killed. And also its implied by this screenshot that she wasnt ACTUALLY killed by cyn right then
(the scientists, the sword beside her, the footprints, the way shes sitting against the wall, the expression she has. she totally just saw all that shit)
and she cant have been skyn bc the scientists wouldve known. the skinsuit wasnt exactly. hm. pretty.
which means she DID see her whole family+more slaughtered in front of her while she was powerless to stop it. She DID see J violently kill everyone around her. She DID see Cyn kill everyone. And she just has to. Deal with that. And despite all her efforts, the solver took over and cyn killed her. (im assuming tessa died somewhere around when n's mineshaft flashback was like i mentioned b4)
and all the while she was convinced shed lose N, id assume. based on the state of the other drone out there.
And honestly, i think what she got was worse.
also i am team "N knew Tessa wasn't the same Tessa he knew back on Earth"
The way he looked at her, and the way he was suspicious of her. He knew HIS Tessa would never treat a drone like this. Cyn has been known to have relatively shitty recreations of people at times (like Thad in episode two) But even so there was no way he could believe it was someone else (like. who would it be? he saw her blood he heard her voice like...) which is why he was so stressed after killing her (when he leaned on his sword and was breathing heavy, yk?)
he loved her and she loved him and now shes dead. just like everyone else he loved.
this isnt about n but like. idk if tessa could see him now i think shed cry. she loved him and all of them
#tzu rambles#i just. she was a kid dude#she was a stupid hurting abused kid#she was treated like shit by her mother and probably her father too#and all she had were those drones#the ones that killed her and her family#the ones that ruined her life and destroyed earth#the ones that MIMICKED HER TO THE PEOPLE SHE LOVED MOST#THE “N!!!” SQUEAL. THE PETTING HIS HAIR. THE DISMISSAL OF J#FUCKING SICK AND TWISTED#Bc i genuinely believe that if Tessa HAD come to copper 9 alive she wouldve been like that#maybe a little more sympathetic to uzi. like if she knew abt the patch she wouldve used it. i know that#but otherwise i think shed be like that. silly. silly like that.#(esp kicking that computer monitor. we all saw her chuck a glass at the floor for no reason)#child abuse#abuse tw#tessa james elliot#murder drones#tessa elliot#tessa md#md tessa#tessa murder drones#murder drones tessa
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