#i just wanted three idiots in love

[ijustknowthatihatethat]

I was in the mood for dratchrod so I decided to look into the #

WHY EVERY NEWEST POST ABOUT DRATCHROD IS HAVING PREGNANT RODIMUS

[icejello]

Me after reading The S Class That I Raised immediately after reading TCF: i love you main characters that keeps putting yourself in situations despite saying you only want to live a peaceful life (thinks about orv) oh... Not you tho Kim Dokja, you always planned to kill yourself and i love you for that but PLEASE stop

[thomstrainers]

actually crashing out, vent in tags

[luck-of-the-drawings]

when i was in highschool one o my biggest coping mechanisms was drawing all the kids i hated getting killed and eaten and killed. and well. time is a slowly ascending spiral. you will find patterns.(i work as a blackjack dealer. gamblers are FASCINATING

[memento-morri-writes]

I've been thinking a lot about how Rook's reunion with his former mentor, Zara, is going to go, and since I can't predict what the DM is going to have her do or say, I can only dwell on what I know is going to happen. Which happens to include taking off the illusion ring that's been hiding his injuries from her. So have a snippet of the description I have planned for that moment:

tw for description of (mostly healed) injuries

He hesitates, twisting a ring on his finger. Looking at it more closely, she can tell it’s very finely crafted, and must have been very expensive. A large emerald is set into the band. Rook sighs, and pulls the ring off his finger in one quick motion.  Immediately she’s struck by the difference in his appearance as the illusion melts away. He looks awful. His warm, healthy skin fades to a dull and sickly grey. There’s huge bags under his deeply sunken eyes, and his cheeks are hollowed, as though they have been carved out by an overeager sculptor. He looks like he’s recently risen from the grave.  While he was thin before, now she can see his ribs under the skin, and his collarbones are exaggeratedly pronounce. Thin white lines left by dozens upon dozens of recently healed cuts are scattered across his body. On top of that, faded bruises cover most of his visible skin, a mottled mosaic of purple and yellow. They’re clearly days, maybe weeks old, and she can only begin to imagine what they must have looked like when fresh. Bandages are barely visible under his shirt, wrapping around his back, hinting at even more injuries.

[crimeronan]

there's ALSO hilarity potential in the princess luz AU w amity being like "okay. so he's your cousin on a technicality but like barely acts like your cousin and is basically your brother but you don't call him your brother and you guys are a lot weirder and clingier than i've ever been with my siblings but you're also definitely not lovers so what..... what DO you call him" and luz being like "he's just hunter :) he's my special little guy :)" while hunter, who's been listening to and watching this entire exchange bc he's around luz All The Fucking Time, is like [inb4 amity can say it herself] "i'm her pet dog. woof."

[widevibratobitch]

Since we're both as unwell about him as we are I consider you to be someone who knows a fair amount and what do you genuinely think the real James Fitzjames would feel if he saw the Terror's depiction of him? (As in watching the whole show)

HUH good question. first of all i think he'd be a little discombobulated by the very experience of watching a tv show but personally i choose to believe he'd at least be happy he was made into one of the main characters?? and that so many cool and sexy insane people are obsessed with him now <3

having said that. as much as i love show!fitzjames they did nerf him down A LOT. they robbed him of the joyous whimsy that was such a characteristic trait of the real jokester supreme fitzjames (show!fitzjames also has little to no relationship with his irl lieutenant buddies which. sad.)

we also know now that. most probably. he was actually fully english so i can only imagine he'd be Not Pleased about the cairn scene to say it lightly lmao imagine you and your adoptive family making significant efforts throughout your whole life to disguise the fact of your illegitimate birth and then 150 years later some people make a high rating show where they babygirlify you not only spill your secret to the millions of people watching (or secrets, plural, and make you call yourself a fake as a cherry on top lol) but they also get it wrong and make it Even Worse (from a victorian englishman's perspective) like stop guys he's already dead lmfao

having said that. he would have loved the britannia costume and the your nails are a terror line. i know he would.

[vv-ispy]

If decarabian was a gamer he would have the most decked out setup imaginable. 2000+ dollar custom keyboard where nearly everything but the internal components are made of solid gold. Top-of-the-line pc entirely encased in various ornately decorated gemstones. He would have at least five monitors (bonus points if they also double as surveillance monitors.) His gaming chair would in fact be a literal throne. At times he thinks that video game logic must surely apply to real life mortal human logic as well and vastly overestimates how durable most humans are.

Someone save her

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Gabriel: For the crime of betraying heaven and dating a demon...

Aziraphale: Uh. I'm not dating Crowley

Gabriel: Lying is only going to make the situation worse. We have evidence!

Sandalphom: *shows photos of Crowley and Aziraphale lunch dates and holding hands at the park*

Aziraphale: That's just things we do as friends.

Micael: Mayhaps, but aren't you two a queerplatonic couple?

Aziraphale: A what?

Gabriel: *trying to not show he also has no idea what a queerplatonic couple is* hahahaha you're telling the truth.

Aziraphale: Why is this funny?

Micael: Let me get this right. You followed every single dating procedure to the point is punishable. Not only that but you betrayed us for your demon's sake-

Aziraphale: It was also for Earth's sake. I mean of course a part of it was for Crowley and our friendship but also stopping Earth for ending being the endgoal shows that saving the plane and it's inhabitants was a major player on my decision. Clearly?

Micael: *ignoring him* You did all that... and you're not even dating the demon?

Aziraphale:.. yes

Gabriel: *still laughting* Only you, sunshine, only you. Failing to date the demon you're getting punished for dating.

Micael: You know what I think we should send you back... see if you at least suceeds at dating the demon and them we punish you.

Sandalphom: *that really wanted to see a punishement happenig* What? Gabriel say something.

Gabriel: That's... genial, Micael.

Aziraphale: *confused but hey is a free pass* Is it? I mean it is!

Sandalphom: Why? Isn't it better that he didn't date the demon?

Gabriel: It's embarassing. What type of angel fails at a simple task like that? He likes the demon, the demon likes him at least say it to each other for heaven's sake! We trained him better.

Micael: Yeah. That's too much of a loser behavior, I don't want to make an example out of a loser. I'm here to punish a traitor.

Gabriel: You heard the lady, Aziraphale, chop chop, go date your demon so we can punish you for dating the demon.

[back at the shop]

Crowley: Angel! You're back! I was very worried. Had a cool plan to infiltrate upstairs and all.

Aziraphale: *shaking his head foundly* Of course you did, dear boy.

Crowley: Pray tell, how did you escape the archangels?

Aziraphale: *red as a tomato* I don't wanna talk about it.

-//-

[[Bônus ]]

Aziraphale: *reading about queerplatonic relationships* Crowley! Crowley! Look at that, my dear, I think we have one of those.

Crowley: *reads the page Azi is showing him* Yeah. It checks out.

*nothing about their relationship changes at all*

[[[At heaven]]]

Sandalphom: Micael, Micael, we finally can punish Aziraphale.

Micael: Are you sure? They have exactally the same dinamic they did and they weren't dating then.

Sandalphom: I think I heard they say they had a queerplatonic relationship to that wich girl once.

Micael: Did you check with Gabriel?

Sandaphom: He is watching The Sound of Music.

Micael: Oh Lord! You think it will last ten years again?

Sandalphom: I hope not. I still have Do-Re-Mi flasbacks.

[dead-philosophy]

Skullface through the years.

[xisanamii]

clown nose honk it's time to start the greatest show

very brief drabble under the cut bc i don't know if i have the capability to write a full-length chapter about this no matter how hilarious the concept is

"Why does Masacoach get the coolest role?" Erika grumbled. "Teachers don't even have to participate in Volunteer Day."

"It is for the sake of the children that have requested the presence of a circus troupe," Liu Wei responded, poking his rubber bodysuit. "I believe, however, that the usage of this attire was not necessary." If one were to look closely, they could see the beginnings of a pout of his stoic visage. "I have muscles of my own..."

"You can't be half naked in public in Japan," Himuro stated.

"You can't be half naked, but you can wear booty shorts in public?" Erika arched an eyebrow.

"If it isn't your real ass," Himuro shrugged.

"Can we just start already?" Murasakibara grumbled. "I look stupid. This is stupid. Our school is stupid."

Masako merely shook her head at the group of complaining teens. "It's only for a day, and you all practiced your acts. You'll be fine."

"I didn't say we weren't fine, I just think it's unfair - ow!"

"Perhaps one day A-Xiang shall be learning the lesson of not responding with snark to our circusmaster."

"So, are we going to pretend that Erika-chan dressing like a seal isn't the weirdest thing about this Volunteer Day?"

Erika glared at Himuro. "Everyone else was gracious enough to ignore the obvious! You suck."

"Well-" Himuro waved his hand around helplessly. "I thought you were practicing riding a unicycle."

The manager looked away, clearly refusing to answer. Murasakibara and Liu Wei exchanged looks, wondering if they should blow the whistle. In the meantime, Masako tapped her shinai against her shoulder, sighing deeply. This was going to be a long day.

[lionblaze03-2]

Happy four year adoptiversary to my handsome little boy Montgomery Montgomery Python!!!

Got him august 11th 2019 in lieu of my 16th birthday three days later. I’m turning 20 now. I cannot BELIEVE I’ve had this stupid little rascal for four entire years it does NOT feel like it. Hobbies include hiding in my computer, staring at nothing, and trying to escape his glass prison in the dark. I love him

[tiredassmage]

So I’m on Tatooine, right? And I know Nine says there’s plenty of room in the containers, but personally it’s way more funny that there’s just barely enough room to conceal a 6′0 Cipher and his scrappy Rattataki companion and their rifles without shooting each other’s toes off.

So I just imagine Tyr and Kaliyo cramming themselves in in an awkward game of Twister meets Tetris and they settle in glaring at each other because they get along just enough to cooperate but not enough to exactly appreciate that she’s essentially in his lap and Tyr just growls “Don’t you dare” and it’s one of the few times they just mutually agree to never talk about something again.

But this is also Kaliyo so she still ribs him about, “Hey, agent. Is that a vibroknife?” And yet both of them make the most offended scoff at the mere suggestion.

[gayemoji]

im going to kill a certain vicadin addict so bad. not before i give him some actual unrequited love first. i love him but he is so stupid.

[beauty-grace-outer-space]

Didn't even make it til 10AM without sobbing at my desk this time.

[itsdappleagain]

a tale as old as time: a neurodivergent suicidal artist bro and the centuries old greek goddess who comes down to earth to inspire him. they might kiss. if they do that the muse might get executed by her own father. and the artist might as a result kill himself. but they might kiss