#i just want to secure my apartment with den i need an office space please 😭

[fiona-fififi]

...

[antiquechampagne]

Antique Champagne - CH 43 - Glitz

Stepping out onto the platform, Payne couldn’t help but chuckle as Hancock wobbled on shaky legs. The movement of the monorail had played quite a trick on his equilibrium.

“No sea legs, eh boss?”

“Some people think ghouls aren’t meant to fly.”

Strong frowned as he passed by Hancock. “Ghoul not flying. Ghoul standing.”

Payne wrapped an arm around Hancock. “He’s got a point!”

“Ah, shut up! I’m fine!” He sat down on a bench. “Just give me a sec. I’m not used to the floor moving all around like that… at least when I’m not buzzed.”

Nate turned to the group, a serious look plastered on his face. “Now, I’ve got some ground rules. Here, in Nuka-World, I am the Overboss. There are three extremely large and deadly raider gangs I’m in charge of. They’ve been warned that I am bringing in some friends from the Commonwealth. They should leave you alone… but don’t push your luck. I’m trying to…” He paused, thinking of the right words. “…free a population of enslaved traders here with as little blood shed as possible. They are completely under the raider’s thumb. If things go sideways, a lot of innocent people will be caught in the crossfire.”

“Okay, don’t start any fights. Got it.” Payne could tell Hancock wasn’t thrilled but agreed.

Nate continued. “Second, you need to stay in the main parks. Don’t go wandering off into the bush. There are a lot of nasties out there… shit a lot bigger and deadlier than what we have in the Commonwealth. If I have to report to Fahrenheit that a cave cricket ate you, I have a feeling my head would end up on a pole.”

Hancock agreed. “I can see that rubbing her the wrong way.”

“Lastly,” His glare brightened into a smile. “Enjoy yourselves. There is a lot of stuff here to do. You have three days to explore the parks, but don’t forget to take some time to relax! Especially you!” He pointed a finger at Payne. “It’s no secret what you went through while this lug was taking his extended nap.”

Payne shooed him while she readjusted the bag on her shoulder. “Enough talking. Let’s get going! At least… if you can manage to walk.” She ribbed Hancock.

“Bah!” Hancock stood up. “I thought you wanted to spend your whole vacation in the parking lot.”

As they made their way across the vast empty expanse of pavement, Payne couldn’t contain herself as she passed under the giant marquee. She felt like her smile reached from ear to ear. As they walked by, groups of raiders would spot Nate, turn and nod at the Overboss.

“Let’s head over to the map so you guys can get your bearings.” Nate started to shuttle them around to a raised dais when they crossed paths with a giant walking cola bottle. It raised a rusted oversized gloved hand.

“Well, hello there, young lady! Welcome to Nuka-World!” a cheerful voice buzzed over a tinny internal speaker. “I’m N.I.R.A., your friendly Nuka-World Informational Robotic Assistant. Is this your first visit to Nuka-World?”

Payne snorted and smiled. “I’m not sure ‘young’ is the right way to describe me.”

“You know, a lot of people say just the same thing. The way we see it, everyone who steps through that gate is a child at heart. Now, before you set off on our grand Nuka-adventure, let me tell you about…” A strange electronic noise emitted from the robot, it’s arms shaking with some internal glitch.

“Error. System Malfunction.” The cheerful voice dropped an octave. “Are you finished wasting my time, you filthy, low-life scavver? Cause I’m getting bored, and when I get bored, I get violent!”

Payne’s eyes widened with surprise. “Ah… what?”

“Aw, what’s wrong, dirtbag? Too hopped up on chems to understand English? Or just too stupid? Well, I think you heard me just fine.” A grating tone interrupted N.I.R.A.’s tirade.

“System restored.” N.I.R.A.’s original cheery voice reasserted itself. “Oops! Sorry about that little glitch. Data logs indicate unauthorized tampering with my personality subroutines. Please contact a Nuka-World maintenance technician as soon as possible.”

From behind her, Nate stifled a laugh behind a fist. Payne turned around. “You knew that was going to happen, didn’t you!”

“Welcome to Nuka-World!” he quipped. Nate ushered the pair up the few steps to a giant map. “Get familiar with this map, there are plenty of left over brochures if you need one.” He started pointing to the map as he spoke. “Okay, we are in Nuka-Town USA. I’ll give you a tour in a bit, but I’ll warn you now: stay away from the raider dens. There are three of them, each easily identified by the graffiti around them.” He quickly pointed to the locations. “There is a bar, market and arcade you can check out. You will be staying in my personal apartment on top of Fizztop Mountain while you’re here. It has some of the best views in the park, if I do say so myself. It’s completely private and secure. If you really feel the need, you can go and talk to Bradberton under the old park offices… but I wouldn’t recommend it. He’s not the best company.”

Payne baulked. “Wait… Bradberton is still alive?!”

Nate shrugged. “In a manner if speaking… if you call a disembodied head in a jar being alive.”

“Holy shit! That’s nuts!” Hancock shook his head.

Nate nodded in agreement before pointing to an area on the map ringed by tall stone pillars. “That’s Dry Rock Gulch. It’s an old west themed park that has a decent saloon. The cowboy robots are a nice touch, but there’s not much else to do there.” Next he moved on to an area with a giant tree sprouting from the middle of it. “Safari Adventure specialized in exotic animals, quite a few even survived the war. Hancock has even arranged for a little something special there tomorrow evening.”

Payne glanced at the ghoul, who was hanging back watching her. She cocked an eyebrow, a wordless question that he left unanswered except for a coy smile.

“I’m sure Hancock is going to want to check out Kiddie Kingdom. Not only does it have quite a few working rides, but it is a ghoul safehouse. Oswald’s a stand up kinda guy and very protective of his friends.”

A man stepped up to the side of the dais. He was wearing yellow armor, one of his eyes similarly covered by a matching eyepatch.

“Boss? You gotta minute?”

“One sec, Gage.” Nate looked concerned as he turned back to Payne and Hancock. “Galactic Zone and World of Refreshment are still too dangerous for causal sightseeing. I suggest taking a minute to think about it. There is a lot to do in the park… if you are so inclined. Excuse me.” He stepped away to confer with the raider out of earshot.

Hancock came up behind Payne, wrapped his arms around her waist and gave a little squeeze. “Whatcha want to do?”

Payne gave a little sigh. “I’m a little overwhelmed, to be honest.” She turned her face to his. “I still can’t believe I’m actually here. I never thought I would see this place, even before the war.” Stepping free of his grasp, she slipped her hands into his. “You didn’t have to do this, you know.”

“I know, but you deserve something special for everything you did for me.” Before she could protest, he gently took her cheek in his hand, giving it a slow caress. “But don’t expect this every time you pull my ass out of the fire.”

She couldn’t help but chuckle. She turned back to the map. “I don’t know where to start. What do you want to do?”

“Lady’s choice.”

It was clear she wasn’t going to get any help from him.

While she studied the map, she remembered something Nate had mentioned. “What about the arcade? I haven’t been to one of those in ages. Hell, I think the last time I was in one I was… I don’t know… 11? We can drop our stuff off in the room, then hit the arcade. The winner can buy a round of drinks at the bar Nate talked about. We can worry about the other parks tomorrow after we get some rest. Sound good?”

Hancock nodded. “Sounds like a plan, chief.”

When Nate returned, they told him their plan.

Soon they stood at the foot of the towering Fizztop Mountain waiting for the industrial lift to lower to street level. Someone moving on the edge of Payne’s vision caught her attention. She turned to Nate and pointed to a man splashing around in a giant stagnant pool of water.

“Um… what is that guy doing?” She asked.

Nate rolled his eyes a bit. “That’s Dave. He thinks there is some kind of treasure hidden in the water.” “He hasn’t found anything.” Dave looked up. Nate gave him a little wave. “He’s been at it for weeks.”

The lift hit the concrete with a heavy metallic clank. As the group was slowly pulled into the air, Payne stared at the towering structure above her. The view reminded her of looking up at the dazzling lights of Lucky 38 casino as she walked the streets of Las Vegas so long ago. Once inside, Nate gave them a quick tour. It was clear the apartment had once been a swanky restaurant of some kind. Now it was retrofitted with a couple of bedrooms, several work benches and a variety of amenities to make the space more comfortable.

Returning to the dining room turned living space, Nate turned to them. “Well, I hope you enjoy it up here. I have some business to take care of. There is a stash of Nuka-Cade tokens and old world money in the bar. Feel free to use ’em. If you need me, just ask around.”

Soon the Overboss was lowered out of sight, leaving the pair alone. In the living room, a huge bed sat in the corner, partially quartered off by a myriad of trunks and tall dressers, creating a semi-private room. Opening a large footlocker, Hancock stashed his pack inside, Payne following suit.

“It’s so quiet up here! I’m not used to that anymore,” she commented as she gazed out the floor to ceiling windows… most of which were still intact. The night speckled with rows of lights from the various facades dazzled her for a moment. “The view up here is amazing!”

“The view’s not what I’m looking at…” Hancock smiled before giving her a quick squeeze. “But we’ll have time for that later. Right now,” he released her, and gave her a little shove. “I’m ready to kick your ass in the arcade!”

Payne headed to the bar, pocketing the stash of tokens and cash. “Remember, loser buys drinks!”

“You’re on!”

They made their way to the arcade, their spirits high. Inside, Payne felt transported back in time. An array of blinking neon lights and shrill music bombarded her senses. A gruff raider grunted as they entered.

Payne’s eyes went wide. “Oh my god! They have Whac-a-Commie! I haven’t played that game in ages!” She ran over the squat red square contraption, grabbing the mallet. She fed coins into the slot, raising the weapon in giddy anticipation.

For the next few hours, they drifted from machine to machine, carousing, cursing and laughing the whole time. Payne was a natural at Whac-a-Commie, while Hancock quickly became an ace at Atomic Rollers. He easily sunk shot after shot in the center hole, so much so that Payne took to poking and tickling him randomly to throw him off his. They were cackling so uproariously by the time they got to Hoop Shot that, even though both of them tried, neither could concentrate enough to get close to landing on the leader board. After the ticket machine totaled their armful of tickets, Payne raised her Nuka-Cola Victory in triumph, leaving Hancock to nurse his loss with a paltry Nuka-Grape and a plush sloth.

“You cheated.” He playfully grumbled. “You just couldn’t stand how great a throwing arm I have.”

She brushed him off. “The only reason you’re so good with that arm is because of how much time you spend stroking yourself with it! Now, pay up!”

They headed to the bar. The older woman behind the counter served them a couple of beers. While they stood chatting and drinking, a raider approached them.

“You two are the Overboss’ special guests in the park, aren’t you?” Her voice was low and even, almost calculating.

Payne studied the woman. She wondered how the raider could see at all, given her matte metal helmet seemed to encase the top of her head, with no perceivable eyeholes. The shape was reminiscent of an angry gecko, its frill stretched out on display.

“Yeah, we are. What’s it to you?” Payne asked.

“Oh, I mean no intrusion. We occasionally get traders that wander through, but never actual guests. The Overboss must think very highly of you.”

Hancock nodded. “I suppose he does.”

“How are you enjoying our little slice of heaven?” The evenness with which the woman spoke unnerved Payne. Her tone was like silk dipped in poison.

“So far so good. We only just got here. Gotta say, your arcade is riot.” Hancock pulled the purple sloth and playfully made it nod its head. “I might just have to start a collection.”

Payne had a suspicion that the raider was not interested Hancock, but somehow scrutinizing her.

“Delightful.” The raider barely tilted her head in Payne’s direction. “May I beg an indulgence?” Payne nodded. “I am quite the admirer of blades. Some may even call me a collector of sorts. I noticed the knife at your side. May I see it?”

Payne glanced down at the weapon strapped to her hip. She gave a small shrug. “Sure.” Deftly, she unsheathed the blade and handed to the woman.

The raider turned the knife over in her hands, studying the curve of the blade and testing the balance. Her thumb traced the D carved into the handle.

“Where did you happen to find such an exquisite beauty?”

“I pulled it out from between my ribs.” Payne said flatly. Something about this woman rubbed her the wrong way, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.

“You should have seen what she did to the one who put it there!” Hancock interjected.

“I see.” The raider flipped the knife gracefully, facing the hilt towards Payne. “Let’s hope she serves you better than her previous owner.” Payne replaced it in its sheath.

The raider walked away without another word and disappeared out the door.

Hancock leaned over to her. “Well, that was random.”

The bartender spoke under her breath. “You might want to be a bit more careful.”

“Why?” Payne asked.

“That was Nisha. I suggest you don’t get on the Disciples leader’s bad side… unless you want to end up sliced up like a brahmiluff roast.” Before they could ask any questions, the bartender found herself something else more pressing to clean at the opposite end of the bar.

Payne and Hancock quickly finished their drinks and retired to the apartment high in the sky.

“It’s been a long day. I think I’ll hit the sack.” Payne said.

“Where are you going? The bed’s out here!”

Payne pointed to the giant windows. “I’d rather not sleep in a solar oven, thank you very much.”

Hancock winced. “Forgot… sorry.”

Payne quickly fell asleep. A few hours later, she felt the bed bow as Hancock crawled in next to her. She smiled, hoping tomorrow would be even more fun than today had been.

[justanotherloveaffair]

I Trust You (Part 8/8)  - Chadwick x Reader

Summary:  You start to pave your own way forward, finally finding yourself on the road to a better future - but will it include Chadwick?

Warnings:  None. Just fluff.

Word Count: 3,593

Author’s Note:  To clarify the timeline (important for this chapter), this chapter/story takes place PRE-filming of Black Panther.

And it’s done! Thank you again to everyone who read, commented, and enjoyed this story. I had a blast writing it and reading your reactions!

Since Tumblr is being a little bitch these days, please check the comments for a link to my Masterlist, and Chapter 7.

Taglist:  @purple-apricots, @deliciousstreetkidcroissant, @ashanti-notthesinger, @onyour-right,  @maverickabull, @lavitabella87, @brianabreeze,  @fullonfrenzy, @grandadchadwick, @builtalongthewayside, @belauriette, @jaeee-http, @airis-paris14,  @fortuitoushappenings , @queentearra  

Your apartment was, as a fancy-talking realtor would put it, “Cozy.”

The space you and Ariana were sharing was in the basement of a house, with two older women who lived upstairs and rented their basement suite for extra retirement income. 

Since it was a basement, there were only thin windows allowing some light in, so to counteract the darkness Ariana had furnished it with lots of floor and table lamps for lighting. Walking downstairs, you were immediately in the living room, which was tolerably clean by your standards. A small kitchen of just the basics was tucked into a little corner. 

The ‘den’ you were paying rent for was big enough for a twin sized bed that took up half the room. The saving grace was the room’s closet, which had a built-in wardrobe and shelves, enough room to stash your suitcase. 

Ariana seemed apologetic as she showed the room to you. “Like I said, you won’t pay the full rent since you don’t have a full-sized room.” She looked at you anxiously, chewing her lip. “Are you okay with it?” 

A brief flash of regret went through you, thinking about Chadwick’s offer and all that went along with it. But your gut was telling you this was the right decision, and only time would prove you wrong. You responded to Ariana’s question with an assured smile. 

On your first evening in your new apartment, you curled up on the couch attempting to get to know your new roommate a little better, and as irony would have it, the one thing you were trying to push from your thoughts, was the one thing she wanted to talk about. 

“PleaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAse give me details,” her palms came together in front of her face, pleading in prayer, “and don’t think I didn’t see you trying to swallow each other’s tongues from the front window.” She abandoned her praying gesture to smack your arm, smirking. 

“You snoop!” You laughed, and responded to her round, pleading, hopeful eyes with a secretive shrug.

You were committed to staying guarded out of protectiveness for the past few days you had shared with him, that just didn’t feel right to talk about. You deflected her questions until she gave up, at least, she promised, for now.

All through your evening, and that night when you tried to sleep, he was all you could think about. 

That night, while Dodger snored next to you, you turned from side to side, experimenting with different sleeping positions on your small bed when you felt a vibration under your pillow. 

You scrambled to pull the phone up to your squinting eyes in the dark room, the blueish light from your screen illuminating the smile on your face as you read the text from Chadwick. 

I miss you.

You couldn’t help but picture him lounging naked in his bed at 1:30am, also struggling to sleep and burning with thoughts of you while you were doing the very same thing. Both of you, side by side, smiled at your phones, and Chadwick saw your text bubble come through just seconds later: 

Miss you too.

//

You felt strange and unprepared returning to work the next day. When colleagues asked how your weekend was, you almost wanted to laugh. A year’s worth of life experiences had happened since Friday. Where to even start? I was assaulted on Friday, then I met and ended up staying with an apparent movie star who helped me move out with my shitty ex, and yesterday I just moved into a new place. Oh and I got my back blown out a few times. How was your weekend?

Proving how long your absence seemed, when you sat down at your computer, you had completely forgotten your password, and had to sheepishly phone your IT department. 

The morning passed quickly as you caught up and you stealthily passed a few text messages back and forth with Chadwick, who apparently wanted you to know whenever he was thinking of you, and that morning, it was often. 

Just before your lunch break, your boss, a short, but fierce older woman with a halo of curls and thick black rimmed glasses, stopped at your desk.

“Y/N, welcome back, I’ve been meaning to catch you all morning but have been in nonstop meetings – how are you feeling?” Her concerned expression confused you for a second, until you remembered calling in sick.

You slid your phone under your thigh to hide your text message conversation, and swivelled in your chair to give her your full attention. “I’m feeling better, Kirsten – thanks.”

You respected your boss and felt a little guilty lying to her, but weren’t sure what you could say.

You then heard the most dreaded words an employee can hear from their manager, although her face was kind and her tone casual as she asked, “Do you mind stepping into my office?”

“N-No, not at all.” With a grim expression, you stood and followed her, and she closed the door behind you, the thud of it closing sounding ominous. 

“Take a seat,” she gestured at her wooden visitor chair, and moved her small frame behind the heavy desk. As she did, she pulled out a nondescript folder from her cabinet, and placed it between you.

Your heart was beating a million miles per minute at what could have prompted either the reprimand that was coming, or your dismissal.

When Kirsten opened the folder, what you saw took you completely by surprise.

They were security camera photos. The first picture showing an elevator, grainy and in black and white, a man and a woman.

The time stamp on the picture was the exact time you left the office on Friday, but you didn’t need that piece of information to know that this was you and your attacker.

In the photo, your face was a blank mask, expressionless. You seemed made of stone. He looked exactly as you tried not to remember. The camera angle had a birds eye view of his bald head with the combed over hairs. 

Looking at it gave you a sick, squirming feeling in your stomach as you relived the disgust and fear that was going through your mind in that very moment.

That was just the first picture. You could see others behind it, three or four, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look at them.

Your hand stayed firmly planted over your mouth in an attempt to inhibit an uncontrollable need to explode somehow. Throw up, panic, cry, scream. All seemed possible, and you made a whimpering sound holding them all back in front of your boss.

Kirsten gathered the photos and wordlessly closed the folder.

“Building security brought these to us, once they matched the timing of the photos to your key card swiping into the parking level.” Her voice was gentle, steady and calm, her eyes moist with emotion. “They were able to match his as well.”

You wiped at your cheek, catching the rolling tears and you sniffled, your voice hoarse, “They know who it is?”

“They do, and there is enough evidence here to do some harm, but it’s up to you if you would like to give a statement to the police and confirm his identity.”

Your brain was in shock trying to take everything in at once and you sat quietly trying to process her words. Kirsten handed you a tissue from a nearby box, which you took gratefully to dab at your eyes. 

She placed a comforting hand on your arm. “It’s your choice to talk to the police or not, Y/N. If this is too hard, you don’t have to do anything, but I strongly encourage that you give this bastard what he deserves, and you have my support. I am so sorry this happened.”

Clutching the tissue in your hand, you considered her words, weighing the emotional price you’d be paying to describe your experience to the police, and potentially a courtroom, with whatever the outcome might be.

You decided it was worth it. 

“I’ll do it.” You said numbly. 

After giving you a tight hug, Kirsten told you the police would be in touch very soon and as you walked back to your desk, relief and anxiety competed for control of your mind. 

It was an overwhelming amount to take in and you could barely focus on your work. The news had brought back all of Friday’s memories in fresh, raw detail. Each of your senses participated in the full body recollections and you made regular trips to the bathroom just to breathe and calm yourself. You knew the police would want to know everything and you had to be prepared to relive it all. 

The experience of making a formal statement and pressing charges against your attacker was more difficult and personally draining than you could have imagined.

Kirsten gave you the next few days off of work. Three hours were spent at the station, walking two policemen through your memory of that night, and the rest of the time to recover at home, alone, sapped of energy and hugging your pillow in bed.

All you told Chadwick was that security camera footage had been recovered of your attacker. 

Of course, he immediately wanted to see you, but you needed time alone. Instead, you made plans to see him for lunch that Friday. 

The next few days were a blur and thankfully, Kirsten was sympathetic and reassigned most of your work to your teammates. Only those who needed to know were privy to what was going on, and Kirsten kept it quiet, by your wishes. 

After a few days, you were ready to get back to work and especially excited to see Chadwick again.

On Friday morning, a nervous, excited feeling kept you distracted as you anticipated 12:00, when you were expecting to meet him. 

Sitting in your cubicle, you perked up instantly at the sound of his familiar voice, filtering over from the reception desk. You could have recognized that voice if he was whispering at a concert.

“Hi, I’m here to see Y/N, is she around?” 

Your coworker shot you a curious look at the way you jumped in your seat and began beaming and rushing to bundle up your things with a sudden shot of adrenaline.

You saw him before he saw you.

He was looking around, glancing left and right trying to anticipate where you would be coming from. In the past few days, you pictured him vividly in your minds-eye, but you could never recreate how stunning he was in person. He was in a dark zip up hoodie, just form fitting enough to show off his sculpted arms, and wearing black skinny jeans bulging with his wallet. 

You were already grinning like an idiot, hurrying towards him and when he spotted you, his face lit up.

“Y/N, oh my god!” He exclaimed as you jumped into his arms. He laughed in your ear, hugging you bone crushingly tight. You breathed him in deeply, a feeling like relief spreading through you. 

“I’m so happy to see you,” you gushed when you finally came apart, grinning widely at each other. 

His eyes roamed your face rapidly like he was trying to take all of your features in at once, while you did the same. You couldn’t pick a favourite. His eyes. No, his lips. No, those cheekbones when he smiles. Oh but I love that cute nose. His facial hair… you absorbed him with ecstatic, fawning thoughts while you held him by the arms.

There was no mistaking the cracking chemistry between you. It turned out it hadn’t been a fluke, the product of strange circumstances and your jumbled-up mess of a mind. It was still very much there. Looking at him made your heart pound painfully. 

“Ready to go? You hungry?” He asked. 

“I’m ready!” Restored by his presence, you bounced out of the office like a wind-up toy after a good crank, with the receptionist rubbernecking at the pair of you as you left her sight.

Chadwick’s body was firmly attached to yours, walking with you arm-in-arm and smiling at you every chance he got.

As you rode the elevator and walked through the foyer to get outside, you caught each other up on minor news as Chadwick slowed his long-legged pace to keep up with your short strides. You kept in rhythm, left leg, right leg, synchronizing without even intending to and with the smiles and constant touches, you appeared to anybody else who saw you as a couple of smitten lovebirds. Including some of your co-workers, who acknowledged you with a nod.

There was a soup and sandwich place both of you aimed towards, serving mostly business clientele on their lunch breaks. You ordered a reuben while Chadwick got a veggie wrap and you finally disentangled yourselves to pay and carry your food to a table.

“So I have something to tell you,” you blurted the moment you were sitting down. 

Chadwick’s mouth was already full from his first bite. He lowered the wrap, setting his captivated attention on you as he chewed. 

“They tracked down the guy who attacked me through security photos, and I’ve pressed assault charges. He’s currently awaiting trial.” You smiled behind steepled fingers, half hiding your face as you awaited his reaction.

Chadwick hurriedly swallowed his bite. “Oh my god!” he gasped, “are you fucking serious? Y/N!” His chair screeched as he jumped out of it and you rushed out of yours to meet his hug.

“I can’t believe it!” He cradled you from side to side, crushing you in his arms, and then pulled back, his fingers cupping your cheeks. “This is the best news I could have hoped for. How do you feel?” He tenderly kissed your forehead.

“Honestly?” You paused as he searched your eyes, “I’m …. relieved, I am,” you breathed out. 

Both you and Chadwick took your seats again, and the people around who were staring went back to their meals.

“But?” He prompted, pushing his chair back in.

“It’s just been draining... the whole process,” you finished. 

“I can’t imagine Y/N. But you should be so proud. I’m so proud of you.” His eyes were shining. “You’ll have to tell me everything. I want the whole story,” he said decisively, putting his elbows on the table, and completely ignoring his wrap with the one missing bite.

You played with the crust of your reuben, but seemed just as uninterested in eating as Chadwick. “I will… I promise. But maybe sometime soon.” You smiled up at him.

His cheerful expression wavered a little and Chadwick scratched the back of his head. Immediately, alarm bells went off in your mind. Uh oh.

“I’ve got some news too.” He started, in a neutral tone. 

Your smile, and the mega-watt light bulb illuminating it, flickered out. “What?” 

Chadwick shifted in his seat as you waited in suspense. 

“Well, I’m going away for a bit on a project. For three months.”

Your skin broke out in goosebumps and you exhaled slowly. You had been convinced he was about to tell you something else. Like he was seeing someone. 

“Oh! When do you leave?” You kept your tone light.

“This week.” 

Though his voice was regretful in tone, you could see he was buzzing with excitement. 

“What’s the project?”

Chadwick’s eyes twinkled with secrets. “I’ll tell you when I can – when there aren’t so many ears around.” He eyed the full tables surrounding you before meeting your gaze again. “But I’m really excited about this. Maybe more excited than I’ve ever been.”

You felt his flush of happiness as if you were conjoined by the heart, and it warmed you to see. “That’s incredible news! Amazing,” you clapped your hands together. “I can’t wait to find out what it is.”

“You will,” he slipped his hand across the top of the table, weaving between plates and cutlery to find your fingers and grasp them.

“I have both a question, and a proposition for you,” he murmured, his voice warm and his face open. 

“Whassat?” You mumbled, full body tingles from his expression making you short of breath and it difficult to speak. 

“The question first, or the proposition first?” He asked with a dancing lilt in his tone.

You could hardly think straight and the words question, proposition seemed like meaningless, made up nonsense.

“Uh… the question.”

He rubbed his thumb over your knuckles and you drew a breath in anticipation.

“Will you wait for me?”

All of the thinking centers of your brain shut down as you processed his question and what he meant by it. 

In front of you was everything you ever wanted and he chose you. He wanted you. 

All you knew was his whole being made you glow from the inside out, and you were kidding yourself if you thought he didn’t feel the same way.

“Chadwick, I….” You trailed off as an avalanche of insecurities, a lifetime of feeling worthless tried to bear down on you, but you beat them back and looked him right in the eyes. 

“Yes. I’ll wait.” 

He smiled in a way that made you feel faint. Relief on his face. Joy.

“Three months?” You questioned softly.

“Mm,” he confirmed and brought your hands to his lips, smiling at you from behind your fingers, a slight playful mischief in his eyes. Like a boy who finally got the toy he wanted.

“I can wait,” your stomach was doing somersaults as you breathed out. “Wait…” you suddenly remembered, “what’s the proposition?”

He took a second to recall his own words and then nodded. “Well, my house is going to be empty…” He led off and lifted his shoulder in a suggestive shrug. “Could use a lovely lady and her dog to watch over it.”

This time you were torn. Obviously, it was an attractive idea, and generous to let you live in his space. You thought about it while he rubbed his full lips over your fingers, waiting.

“Don’t take this the wrong way,” you started. “I want you to know that I’m grateful. But, I’ve just signed the lease with Ariana, and I’ve already committed to at least six –“

He lifted his palm, stopping you. “Hey, it’s okay – you don’t need to explain. No is good enough for me. It was just a thought.” He wasn’t fazed at all and you surged with affection and relief to have found someone you didn’t have to explain and defend your choices to. 

Anxious excitement crept back into your expressions as you looked at each other in a new way. He had asked and you had said yes. Even knowing he’d be gone for a few months, you would be waiting for him. The thought made your brain melt. 

A burst of irrepressible joy escaped your body in the form of a short laugh. 

“What?” He grinned, cocking his head.

“I’m so happy,” you blurted out, your smile lighting up your whole face. “That’s all.”

His brown orbs were a fountain of affection as he took your hand inside both of his. 

“Thank you for trusting me. I would do anything to make you happy, you know that right?”

Your chin trembled at his sincerity. “I do. God…. I’m going to miss you.” You gave him a teary smile and absorbed every detail of his face, locking them into your memories to hold on to for the next few months.

“I’ll be calling you… probably a lot,” he smirked, “and it might not be in my own accent.”

“Oh?” You grinned. “Is it a sexy accent?” 

“I do not know, do you think that this accent is sexy, Y/N?” You stared as he suddenly spoke in a flawless, musical, soft African accent with your mouth dropped open.

“Fuck yes I do,” you laughed and clapped your hands against your cheeks, prompting him with desperation, “I want to hear it again! Please?”

Chadwick laughed, pleased. “I don’t want you to get sick of it yet.” He looked down at your totally uneaten meals, gesturing, “I’m done, are you?”

“Yeah,” you looked at your untouched food, not feeling even the slightest urge to eat it with all that was swirling through your mind.

On your way out, you linked your arms around each other, quickly finding your rhythm as he escorted you back to your office. This time, when he turned to you to say goodbye, your heart was free from the gloom that plagued you when you parted before. Now, you looked at each other, brimming with shared excitement for your future. 

“I’ll call you soon,” his hot breath and lips were on your neck as he hugged you, and he pressed a kiss there. 

“Okay,” you pulled back, about to part when Chadwick crushed his lips to yours, both of you trying to kiss around your smiles and only able to peck one another repeatedly, giggling. 

“Get outta here,” you smacked his behind and shoved him. He blew a kiss at you and you rolled your eyes, but he refused to walk away until you blew one back. “Cheesy bastard,” you murmured under your breath, biting your lip as you waved at each other until you were completely out of each other’s vision. 

When he was gone, you looked left and right, noting how a few people reacted with smiles at your overjoyed expression before you rejoined the business traffic heading back into your office building.

[saijspellhart]

ML Fluff Month

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Read it on AO3

This is a collaborative project between @aknazer, @ao3bronte, @yamina20-blog, @saoirse7ilysi, and myself. We’ve pieced out the prompts for Fluff month and are bringing you our own particular take on them.

2: Safe (Marinette/Chat Noir)

Things you need to know about this AU:

-Takes place after the events of Once a Thief.

-This is a no powers/no Miraculous AU.

-All characters are human.

-Adrien is a cat burglar whose alias is Chat Noir.

-Marinette is a museum curator.

-Plagg is Adrien's former partner, and his normal person name is Felix.

0000

Warning: This has sexual themes, but no sex. 

"God dammit!" When Marinette's cell went straight to voicemail, Adrien ripped the cell from his ear and began furiously tapping in her home phone number.

His relief upon hearing the call ring through quickly evaporated into panic when the call continued to ring without any answer. "C'mon love. Please pick up. Please!" He was about to hang up and call again when the line clicked and a small voice blared into the speaker.

"Hello?" It was the voice of a little girl, her mouth pressed right up against the speaker. So that he could hear each time her lips brushed over it and the harsh whoosh of each tiny breath.

"Isabelle?" he tried, "Where is Mama?"

"Mama is aseep. She worked lots today," Isabelle replied a little too brightly for a child who should've been in bed.

"I need you to wake her up. Can you do that?" Adrien asked as clearly and patiently as he could. Trying not to let his panic bleed into his voice and frighten the little girl on the other end.

"Why?"

His teeth made a painful creak when he gritted them together. She had his suspicious and inquisitive nature, that was for absolute sure. "Please, Little Bell, I'm on my way home right now, and I need you to wake up Mama, and tell her we are playing the hiding game."

"The hiding game!" Her squeal of delight nearly ruptured his eardrum, and Adrien pulled the cell away from his ear to wince.

"Yes, the hiding game!" he replied, lacing his tone with as much urgency and enthusiasm as he could. "But you need to wake Mama and hide with her right now, and don't come out until I come find you."

"Ok!" The cordless phone slammed down on the cradle, ending the call before Adrien could so much a say another word.

Part of him sent praise to the gods that Marinette insisted on keeping an absolutely useless relic of a house phone in her apartment; simply for the nostalgia, and because her parents bought her the phone.

Once the call was ended he turned his attention back to the keypad of an electronic lock, his brows stitched into a scowl behind his mask. He spared another look around the darkened offices he was trapped in, looking for another way out. The windows were useless unless he broke them, which would undoubtedly set off alarms, and aside from the elevator, (which required a now-useless key card) there didn't seem to be another exit.

Adrien glared at the numeric pad for the emergency stairwell again and gnawed at his lower lip. He dialed another number, one he knew by heart, and hoped his old partner was willing to help him out of this jam.

He should have been more careful sneaking into the place. But he had not expected them to change the coding on the key cards at midnight.

The call picked up relatively quickly considering the time of night, and the grumpy male voice that answered sounded more concerned than peeved.

"Hey, Plagg," he hummed in tone much lighter than was appropriate for his current predicament. "You think you could hack the security system on a building for me? I'm afraid Interpol's intelligence system fell through."

There was a snickering on the other end of the line.

"Please be quick, I'm worried about Marinette and Isabelle."

The laughing died out immediately, and Adrien's heart crashed violently against his ribs when Plagg growled, "what's happened to Isabelle?"

"Nothing. But there's a mole in our latest operation and everything's gone to hell. I've already alerted Interpol, and they are out looking for the mole as we speak. But right now I'm trapped in here."

Plagg made a grunt of acknowledgement, and began asking Adrien for information about the building he was trapped inside. Plagg's fingers, clicking away at a keyboard, could be heard on the other end of the line; and if the situation wasn't so dire, Adrien would have sighed at the warm memories of old times that scorched the inside of his chest like a swill of hot cocoa.

0000

The wheels of a black Jaguar F-Type made a maddening shriek against the pavement outside Marinette's apartment building. The car came to an abrupt halt somewhere between two parking spaces and encroaching on the territory of a third. Adrien couldn't bring himself to care even if anyone had been awake that late to raise a fuss.

He barreled out the side of the vehicle, still adorned in the cat burglar get-up, although a ghost of its former self before his incarceration. He punched in the code for entrance to the building, and took the stairs two at a time, practically tumbling forward and dragging himself up the steps using his hands as well.

His mindless panic to reach his family had him fumbling with the lock, his hands quaking so badly the key wouldn't fit the first try. As soon as the lock gave he was through the door in an instant, shutting it almost carelessly behind him before readying his fists and peering into the living area.

"Marinette?" his call echoed through the silence of the apartment. She wouldn't answer, he knew, and neither would Isabelle when he called her name soon after. The point was not to draw them out, but to alert them that it was him searching for them. That he was near in case they were in danger or hiding.

Knowing Marinette, if she'd been drinking and couldn't feel his presence, she would clobber him with a lamp, or worse a rock, in defense of her life and that of her child.

He searched the most conventional hiding spots first, not for them, but for any hostile intruders. When he was absolutely sure the apartment was clear he made his way to the bedroom and crouched by Marinette's expansive workstation.

Adrien sank to his knees before the desk. He ripped his mask off and tossed it carelessly aside, then shoved a swivel chair to the side, and rasped their names. His claws dug at a false back under the desk, digging the panel of wood out to reveal the only reasons he had left to live.

There she was, folded into the cramped space, black hair spilling messily over her shoulders, dressed in a camisole and a pair of his boxer briefs. She was curled protectively around a little blonde girl that stared out at him with eyes the same color as the ones he saw in the mirror each and every morning.

The weight of a freight train lifted from his chest, relief, like oxygen, traveled through his veins. His shuddering inhale reminding him that for the past few minutes he'd hardly even breathed.

"Chat?" Her voice—albeit laced with fear—was like the first drops of a summer storm pelting a scorched earth. Marinette didn't have the room to lift her face from the child's shoulder, but managed to turn her head enough stare at him from their hiding spot.

"Papa!"

Adrien's heart sucker-punched his lungs.

Isabelle scrambled from her mother's embrace. Small flailing limbs undoubtedly kicking Marinette painfully as she crawled out of the hiding space beneath the desk and into Adrien's waiting arms.

"You found us!" Her pleased exclamation unadulterated by the severity of the situation, and the potential danger they could have faced.

"Yes," Adrien rasped, throat cracking from raw emotion. "You hid very well. This is a great spot." He settled Isabelle against his hip, cradled tight by his right arm, and retreated back a step allowing Marinette the room to unfold herself from the hiding space. She accepted his offered hand, slender fingers clasping tightly in his grip as he pulled her out and into his lap.

His left arm crushed Marinette tightly to his chest, his fingers threaded her inky black hair only to grasp it as he possessively embraced her and Isabelle. Two arms never felt so insufficient than it did just then, and he was pressing his face to the tops of their heads, breathing in their scent to ground him. One more assurance that they were safe, and here.

"You're safe," he whispered, rubbing his cheek against Marinette's forehead. He stopped to place a chaste kiss, before repeating the action with Isabelle. "You're both safe."

"Adrien..." Marinette started, but her voice trailed off with questions unasked. She wanted to know what happened, but it wasn't a discussion for Isabelle's ears.

"In a bit," he ducked his head to whisper against her ear. "I promise."

Isabelle's tiny and slightly sticky palm pressed into the side of his face, nearly catching him in the eye and demanding his attention. "Did we win?"

Adrien lifted his head only for her to shift her grip to his nose, causing his response to come out nasally. "Yes, you girls totally won. You're a master hider."

"Better den you?"

Adrien's smile grew impossibly wider. "Even better than me."

Marinette made a noise akin to a scoff, but didn't say anything.

Isabelle looked between them both and stated, "Mom, I'm bedder den Papa."

Adrien started when the front door opened and slammed shut, and Marinette tensed against him. Seconds later a familiar voice sounded through the apartment, and the couple sighed in relief.

"Isabelle? Marinette?" There was a pause and then, "...Adrien? Are you guys alright?"

"Félis!" Isabelle shrieked, worming out of Adrien's embrace with the skill of a weasel and galloping out the bedroom and down the hall. Her squeal of delight could be heard from the entryway.

The sudden absence of the little blonde girl and her unbridled joy at Plagg's arrival made Adrien's stomach sink, twisting into the acrid stirrings of jealousy.

But before it could settle there a heated palm cupped the side of his face, drawing him out of his hurt. He turned and met the blue eyes that had long ago taken his heart captive, and even now sent it hammering a vicious tempo against his ribs.

"Give her time, kitty. She loves you too."

He released a sigh, and tried to smile but she undoubtedly saw right through it. "But Plagg, he..."

"Holds a special place in her heart," she finished for him, then continued on. "And he always will, but you aren't meant to replace it, you're supposed to grow your own. That will happen." Her hands moved, brushing the hair from his ear so her thumb could tease the gold earring there. He unconsciously pressed into her touch, taking unparalleled serenity from it. "But you have to give it time, Chaton."

He tipped his head to kiss the inside of her wrist, meeting her eyes with wordless acceptance.

They could hear Isabelle chattering excitedly to Félix in the front room, his deeper nasally voice sometimes heard between her interspersed exclamations.

"Will you tell me what happened now?"

Adrien shifted his sitting position, until Marinette was straddled more comfortably in his lap. His hands moving to cup her back side, as her arms came to rest on his shoulders, her fingers lacing behind his neck. He met her forehead with his own and began recalling the events of the night, and how they led him to worry for their safety.

After filling her in he concluded by saying, "I couldn't be certain if you and Isabelle would become a target, but I wanted you to be safe should things have turned for the worst."

Marinette expelled a hard breath but didn't open her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Chérie. I didn't want to frighten you."

"I know." She buried her face against his neck, and her arms hugged him tightly. "Thank you for telling me."

"I love you," he whispered feverishly, almost as if he would lose her should he fail to say it. He returned the tight embrace, and murmured the words over and over again.

His string of declarations were cut short when Marinette tore away and kissed him. Her lips molding so desperately perfect against his own sent a shock through his system that had the muscles in his back tensing and his toes curling.

She could do that. Light a fire in every nerve of his body and leave him begging for more.

Adrien recovered, cupping her ass again and hauled her closer. He returned the kiss with helpless enthusiasm, channeling the previous high of fear into a burning desperate need. He devoured her mouth. Stroking lips, followed by insistent tongue and teeth that grazed a little too harshly.

They were her teeth, actually. And they were leaving bruises on his lips that he'd be appreciatively licking later.

A quiet moan escaped him, muffled against her mouth, when she shifted her hips on his lap. His cock no longer twitching in his pants, but straining painfully at the material instead.

Marinette pressed down on him again. Harder. And he wasn't sure if he wanted to whimper or purr.

His claws were kneading her backside, and if they dug in painfully she gave no tell.

A year and half. A year and a half he'd been back, after more than two years away from her. And she still managed to wreck him. Although work with Interpol still kept him busy, and sometimes away for weeks. He made certain to spend any time off he got with Marinette and Isabelle.

Her fingers were clawing at his blonde hair and the shirt at his back. Adrien struggled to breath, and rasped her name between their barely parted lips.

He savored every minute he got with her. To the point that Plagg mocked them relentlessly for acting like young lovers.

He loved her. God, how he still loved her. And if they'd been alone he would have eagerly shown her.

He thought about the underwear she was wearing, the pair that his claws were mostly probably perforating. They were an old green pair of Gabriel brand boxer briefs, a brand that neither of them purchased anymore, and Adrien hadn't acquired any new clothing articles from since before his incarceration.

"What is your obsession with my underwear?" He asked in a breathless but throaty timbre. His fingers slipped below the tired elastic, to caress the sensitive spot at the top of her ass. "Specifically this pair," he added, pressing kisses along the edge of her mouth and down to her chin.

"You've noticed?" She sounded equally affected to his ears.

"How could I not? You play such obvious favorites with my undergarments. This pair even makes its home in your lingerie drawer." He snapped the weak elastic, before sliding his hands away from her backside and down her thighs.

Marinette shivered under his touch and stole another kiss from him before murmuring, "this is the pair you left at my apartment ages ago, when you got shot. I know I gave them back after our first night together, but then you moved in with me and I had to confiscate them for safe keeping."

"Any particular reason?" he purred out, trying too hard to fight a devilish grin that the corners of his mouth hurt.

"They're incredibly comfortable."

He slipped one hand between them to the inside of the briefs where he knew there was a hole worn in them from where her thighs brushed together. She made the cutest sound and jumped in his lap when his claws tickled the exposed sensitive skin. "Clearly," he hummed in response claiming her mouth again and letting his hands slide up her body, inching the camisole up along the way.

The sharp clearing of a throat alerted them to Felix's arrival. He stood in the doorway, holding it mostly closed. "If you guys need to be alone, I can take Isa for a bit."

Adrien ripped his mouth away, head jerking to the side to glare at Félix over his shoulder. Even Marinette seemed to have forgotten their lack of privacy, jerking up as her previously grabby hands slipped away to brace against his shoulders. Both their cheeks flushing red with embarrassment.

"They's kissing!" Isabelle's excited shriek came from the hall, where she was peering through the space between Felix's leg and the door.

"Yes they are," said Félix, and he made a face down at the little girl. "It's yucky."

"Is not!" she stated defiantly. "It's cute!"

Felix shot them a look, and asked again in a low tone. "You guys need some time alone?"

"No, no. Just give us a minute." Marinette straightened up from Adrien's lap smoothing her bunched camisole in the process.

Adrien fell back against the floor in a frustrated heap. He heaved a sigh and looked up at his former partner with a whimsical expression. "Yah, one minute—or five minutes," he stole a glance at his pants. "Then we'll all raid the freezer for ice cream. I still need to call Agent Lahiffe anyway."

And excited squeal alerted them that, if anything, Isabelle had overheard the words, "ice cream."

Author’s Notes:

This particular drabble takes place in the same universe as my Once a Thief Always a Thief fic.

Next up is me again covering the prompt: Summer Love

So tune in tomorrow for something uhhh.... hot?

[readfelice-blog]

moominland chronicles 02 (berlin drei) - I am a cleaner

I am a cleaner,

But please spare me your pity,

I can see your face contorted,

Your hand reaching out to pat me on the shoulder

To tell me,

“It won’t be forever, it’s ok.”

Here in Berlin it’s a commonplace occupation for the creative ennui of the city, there is an army of us, ranging through our twenties and mid thirties, expats from a smorgasbord of countries across the world, we waltz through hostels, homes, offices and bars in our cut off shorts and t shirts, plastic gloves securely fastened over our hands and wipe and wash and scrub. It sounds like an ugly endeavour, perhaps it is, but to me it is bliss.

To support my art, which the vast majority of my kind have to do, I have worked in all sorts of menial and semi skilled jobs, in offices and bars and museums scattered across London. Sometimes they were paid well, mostly they were not, my last job before I left London in a dragons den of a pub, with a blood red interior that oozed cocaine, in Dalston, paid £8 an hour, after rent (you can average that at £600, though that’s still cheap) after tax I was destitute even working a 40 hour week, I was stretched, spending my time strutting behind the bar, drinking myself into a stupor to offset the tiredness and stress of my body, shots to quell the pain.

It just wasn’t for me, it broke me, I was already cracked, it just tapped a nail into the centre of the wound and shattered everything that made me. Then splintered I returned home to resume a full time work week immediately, though the hours were more sociable and the money going to a good cause (getting me to Berlin), it was great swathes of my time spent under the jurisdiction of someone else, at their beck and call, an employee.

All these jobs are me having to repeat the same task in small areas, being penned in by a bar and a clientele, whether palpable or over the phone and internet. Unable to escape anyone that wants to be served, comparing myself, in teams where I ultimately flounder because I am riddled with anxieties that only are compounded by this kind of regular contact. I say yes because I’m afraid to say no.

Not cleaning.

This is a time I can close the door to the world and wipe the grease away, I can approach a task where there will be ultimately be a result and frequently I then get paid cash in hand for my time and walk out into the world and resume my day, satiated and in some halfway state of total release, because I made something dirty clean again. I washed window’s this week, filthy grime ridden windows that marred the sunshine from filtering in to the space, when I stopped the empty house was transformed, I found it in disrepair, sinks and tiles all layered with detritus, it was shabby and dusty and strangling in its dirtiness, I left it renewed, invigorated, I was the doorway that let the light back in.

I went to the moomin house today, up a winding oak staircase lit by stained glass and panelling, with beautiful carvings guiding me up, into a grand apartment replete with thick cosy rugs, lovingly cared for antique furniture, balconies that sat underneath cherubs reaching to the sun, and that tone of blue, I must remember the name of, that so wholly reminds me of the moomins. I was greeted by a jack russel that launched into my crotch as if it was a portal to another world, I’ve done 4 jobs with my freelance agency so far and twice I’ve been lucky enough to have canine companions greet me with their varied and curious owners. In the moomin house she was Finnish, she had a big sauna and a grand piano, sheet music lay about the place, I almost don’t want to google her, I want her to be my incarnation of her, for her to be as magical as she seemed this morning.

I’m travelling into people's most intimate spaces and eating up their lives with a sponge in my hand, as I scrub their toilets I feel no shame, I think instead of how much detail I am getting to consume as I travel around the city in my loose black t shirt and blue running shorts (I’m a little subversive outfit wise), they may be more accomplished according to the social doctrine we all live by, but this does not intimidate me, I do not see my clients as the upper crust of society, I do not feel like they are by rights better than me, because I like cleaning their houses, it gives me respite and mental space. It is a factor in what is one of the happiest times in my life.

I don’t have to pander to people, I’m offering a service that require no mollycoddling or smiling anecdotally when I want to either lash out or walk away. The more to the point and frank I am the more I am appreciated, the rigmarole of service is unnecessary, though of course I need to be affable, but not sickly sweet, which I have always found the most draining of aspects in front of house jobs.

And then there is something almost spiritual, I was dissuaded from this argument last week by a friend, when I compared the cleaning work I do to what zen monks practise in their temples, he mockingly pointed out that they use hand made brushes to gently buff stones, not have their heads in toilets covered in bleach. But, this is besides the point, though the circumstances are quite different it does not detract from the act of expunging the ego, I am hoovering away the cobwebs in my psyche that weave a view of myself as some ornate entity, I feel the cycles of my present world more clearly, I see myself as if I am standing with me, not through convex mirrors that portray me in lights of desired states of being. I am flattening myself somehow, by wiping away dust and de kalking sinks.

Once I finish, which is never longer than 6 hours, I am done.

I am working towards being fiscally stable for the first time in my life.

It’s going to pay for me to re visit Turin.

It is paying for me to live comfortably in this city and buy blue paint and go to see music I really want to see.

It is repaving me.

I am a cleaner.

I am happy being a cleaner.

So happy I don’t want to chase a dream on Friday night this week, I can sit here without fomo, and write at my desk overlooking my rain soaked courtyard in peace.

Ich liebe dich Berlin.

[pebble-xo]

The Secret (13)

prologue; part one; part two; part three; part four; part five; part six; part seven; part eight; part nine; part ten; part eleven; part twelve; part thirteen; epilogue.

“Where are we going Mummy?” Zoe asked again for what felt like the hundredth time since you picked her up from school. With a glance at your rear-view mirror, you could see her swinging her legs excitedly. Unlike you, Zoe loved surprises but was rather impatient for them.

Following the sat-nav, you made a quick left off the main road into a more residential area. All around you were a number of tall apartment buildings, fairly new and modern. “I don’t technically know,” you replied covertly, laughing at her frown. Clearly she didn’t approve of your vagueness.

With another quick glance, you smiled at your daughter staring wide-eyed out the window, taking everything in with her child-like curiosity. “Look there’s a park,” she squealed excitedly, pressing her face up against the glass as you slowly drove past a filled playground. “Is that a swimming pool?” you heard her exclaim behind you as you turned down another road.

“You have arrived at your destination.”

Parking up in a space at the side of the road outside one of the many tall apartment buildings, you switched the car off and turned in your seat to see your excitable puppy of a daughter. “We’re here!” you cheered brightly, reaching over for your phone in your bag. “Wherever here is,” you muttered as a side note, already bringing up Baekhyun’s number and calling.

“Are you here?” he asked as soon as he answered.

You flashed a quick smile and looked up at the building from your window. “Yeah we just parked up outside,” you explained, nodding to Zoe who was staring eagerly at you about to take her belt off.

“I’ll come down and meet you,” he replied, telling you to wait outside the building for him before hanging up.

Throwing your phone in your bag, you grabbed your keys and unbelted yourself, climbing out of the car so you could let Zoe out too. “Was that Daddy?” she asked as you opened the door, jumping down from the car holding onto Mr Snuggles tightly.

“Yes he’s coming down to meet us,” you told her, locking your car and taking her small hand in your own to lead her up the path to the tall building.

While Zoe was distracted by her excitement, you took the time to look around the neighbourhood. There were children similar to Zoe’s age riding scooters down the pavement on the other side of the road, laughing loudly without a care in the world. In your current apartment, there was no way Zoe was able to play like that; your street was too unsafe. Further up the street, you also noticed a guy in a security uniform – Baekhyun wasn’t lying when he said this place was in such a safe environment.

The frosted glass door to the apartment building opened and Baekhyun appeared with a huge grin on his face. “Zoe bear!” he cheered brightly, crouching down and opening his arms wide for your daughter to run into. You stood back and watched as Baekhyun buried his face into Zoe’s hair, picking her up so her legs were wrapped around his waist. “Did you have a good day at school?” he asked, leaning back to look at his daughter’s face.

“No,” she quickly responded with a pout. “Miss Oh gave us maths homework,” she groaned, making you roll your eyes at her dramatics.

Baekhyun laughed, smoothing back Zoe’s messy hair. “You should ask your mummy for help. I always asked her for help with my homework,” he offered, his gaze flickering to you with a guilty smile on his lips.

“When he says I helped him little one, what he really means to say is he used to copy my homework,” you told your daughter, reminded of all the mornings before class started when Baekhyun would be scribbling his homework down with the help of your own.

“That was you helping,” Baekhyun retorted, making Zoe giggle at your bickering.

She pulled on her father’s ear to pull his attention off of you and back to her. “Is this where you live Daddy?” she asked, peering up at the tall building you were still standing awkwardly outside.

Baekhyun shook his head, pushing the door open wider for you to step into. “No we are just visiting a brand new apartment,” he explained to her, being as vague as you were.

However, Zoe didn’t seem to mind. “Let’s go and see!” she cheered loudly, throwing her hands up excitedly in the air.

Like turning on a switch, Baekhyun turned into a jovial real estate agent, explaining that the ground floor had a gym and a security office and access to the underground car park that you could enter from the other side of the building. Then he took you and Zoe up in the lift to the 5th floor, typing in the code to apartment 505 and opening the door. “Go and take a look inside,” he encouraged Zoe, letting her zoom into the apartment like a hurricane.

You let Baekhyun lead you down the corridor yourself, pointing to the doors on your left and right. “That’s storage in there,” he introduced, opening the doors for you to peek inside. “They could be used for coats or shoes or …”

“Art supplies?” you added, trying to imagine all your paints and canvas tucked away in the spacious cupboard.

Baekhyun smirked, closing the second closet on you and wrapping his fingers around your hand. “Oh no, there’s a much better place for them,” he hinted at vaguely, pulling you further into the apartment, into a huge open spaced living room, completely bare apart from the white blinds connected to the tall windows that showered the room with light. “Once it’s filled with a bit of furniture, it won’t seem so big and empty,” he continued.

Zoe came rushing around the corner, wide eyed with arms stretched behind her like a bird. “Mummy this place is so big,” she exclaimed brightly, running straight into your legs and hugging them tight. “There’s even a bathtub!”

“Really?” you played along, brushing her hair off her face.

She looked up at you with deep caramel eyes, the same gaze you had seen a million times from her father beside you. “Why are we here? Who’s going to live here?” she asked cutely, leaning away from your legs to share her confused look with Baekhyun.

“No one lives here at the moment,” you told her, being intentionally vague and cutting off any answer Baekhyun could give. The last thing you wanted to do was get her hopes up when you hadn’t come to any decision. “Why don’t we look at the rest of the apartment together?”

She nodded excitedly and let go of your leg, letting you hold one of Mr Snuggles’ paws while she held the other.

Baekhyun led the way through the living room into a big kitchen with all modern appliances built into the cupboards and countertops. There was a breakfast bar so you and Zoe could have your breakfasts together like you usually did and she could help with cooking easily from a safe distance.

“Let’s go see the bedrooms,” Zoe cried loudly, her excited voice echoing off the empty space. She pulled on your hand and dragged you away from the laundry closet Baekhyun showing you. “Come on, there are three! You have to see them!”

Not able to hold up much resistance, you let Zoe pull you around the corner and down another corridor. You looked back and frowned at Baekhyun. “Three bedrooms?”

Sure enough just as your daughter said, there were three good sized bare bedrooms. One, the master bedroom, had a little en-suite, extra closet space and a little balcony section that seemed to catch the sunrise. For a second, you imagined waking up with the sunlight streaming through the double doors, being able to have a warm cup of tea and watch the light fill up the sky. The thought alone made you itch for your sketch pad.

Zoe was enthusiastic to show you the other rooms, one directly across from the master bedroom and the smallest at the end of the hall. “I thought this one could be your art studio for the time being,” Baekhyun whispered in your ear from behind you as you stared into the third bedroom. “Think of all the beautiful art you could create in here.”

“It’s a spectacular apartment Baekhyun,” you murmured so Zoe wouldn’t hear while she and Mr Snuggles inspected the size of the bathtub in the family bathroom. Turning on the spot, you looked up at his serious face, wanting to push back the messy strands of hair that had fallen over his forehead. “But it’s too much for you to do for us,” you told him. An apartment like this certainly wasn’t cheap and for Baekhyun to buy this apartment for you was a huge burden.

He closed the gap between you both and let his hand trail down your arm until his fingers interlocked with yours. “Nothing will ever be too much when it comes to you and Zoe. This apartment is my way of providing for my family, to make sure that my crazy life doesn’t negatively affect my daughter’s life. If you chose to live here, she’ll be safe. She could ride her bike on the street, she could play with her friends in the playground. She could have a chance at a normal life.” You could hear the emotions thick in his voice. This clearly meant so much to him, to be able to provide for his daughter in a way that would make up for the five years he missed.

But that wasn’t his fault, it was yours. It was your secret; it should be your burden that you had to live with. He had nothing to feel guilty about.

“Please let me do this,” he pleaded softly, his voice cracking on the first word. “I’m the reason the two of you have been thrust into the spotlight. Let me protect you both.”

His words pulled on your heartstrings but your brain told you to look at this logically. “I need to think about it,” you murmured softly, pulling your eyes away from his warm gaze before you fell even deeper into them.

“Ok,” he whispered, brushing his lips against your forehead before backing away and letting your hand fall out of his. “Zoe bear, are you hungry?” he called out, opening the bathroom door and peeking inside.

What a silly question. Zoe was always hungry.

The three of you made up a little den in the living room with the blankets you had in the back of your car and ordered pizzas to the apartment. Zoe pretty much dominated the conversation, talking about her week to Baekhyun while he gladly lapped it all up. All the while, you thought about what life would be like if you did decide to live here. It was a lovely apartment and it was such a safer environment for Zoe to grow up in. It was closer to her school and closer to your work and closer to Baekhyun too. Would it really be so bad to take him up on his offer?

Once the pizzas arrived, there wasn’t much talking done, everyone’s mouths were too occupied with delicious food. You looked out of the tall windows that took up a whole wall in the living room. The sun was setting over the city and a soft orange glow was streaming between the buildings. It was actually sort of beautiful.

Leaning over to wipe the little bit of tomato sauce off of Zoe’s cheek, you pushed her hair away to avoid further messes and smiled at your happy daughter. “What do you think of the apartment little one?” you asked, although you thought you had a pretty good idea already.

“I love it!” she exclaimed, a big saucy grin revealing the chewed up pizza in her mouth. “It’s really big and there’s a playground and a swimming pool nearby! AND THERE’S A BATHTUB!” You didn’t realise the bathtub was such a big selling point. “We don’t even have a bathtub!””

You leaned your head back and laughed. “I didn’t realise you felt so deprived not having a bath,” you teased, catching Baekhyun snickering into his pizza.

“And did you see the playground?!” she cheered excitedly, shoving a huge piece of pizza into her mouth. She mumbled something else that sounded a lot like ‘there was even a really curly slide’ if it wasn’t for the mouthful of pepperoni and cheese.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” you scolded lightly, swiping another smudge of sauce off the corner of her lips.

Returning to your own thoughts, you looked around the apartment and tried to imagine yourself living there: where the furniture would go, where you’d build blanket forts with Zoe, where you would watch Zoe put on her little shows for you. The happiness at even the thought of living in the new apartment was written plainly on her face and for once, you couldn’t find an argument. Living here with Zoe was admittedly the best thing for her. This way she could live a normal life and still have a relationship with her father.

“Hey little one,” you said with a nudge, giving Baekhyun a cheeky smile before leaning closer to Zoe. “How would you like to live here?”

The smile on her face was like Christmas, her birthday and an EXO concert had come all at once. “Really?” she stammered in disbelief, dropping her pizza back into the box. As soon as you nodded, she threw herself in your lap, wrapping her little arms around your neck and squeezing. “Yes please! Can we really?”

Your gaze flickered to Baekhyun who was smirking like an idiot. “There are still some things that needed to be sorted out,” you explained, both to Zoe and Baekhyun. “But hopefully we can make this place our home.”

“This is so exciting,” Zoe cried, leaning back and planting a big kiss on your cheek before jumping off your lap. “Did you hear that Mr Snuggles?” she squealed to her teddy bear, snapping into her own little world of excitement.

Baekhyun turned on the blankets to face you entirely, licking the tips of his fingers slowly while he deliberated his words. “So you’ve decided,” he commented casually, raising his eyebrows at you. “Why the sudden change of heart?”

You sighed softly and brought your knees up so you could hug your legs. “I have to admit, it is an amazing environment for Zoe to grow up in and I can’t deprive her of such a good thing in her life just because I’m too stubborn to accept any help,” you explained, balancing your chin on your knees. You wished with every ounce of your heart that you could afford this place but it wasn’t possible on your current salary. Plus, Baekhyun should have the chance to provide for his daughter, in more ways than just taking her on the odd adventure here and there.

“I guess I’ll put down the deposit tomorrow and then we can sort out leaving your apartment as soon as possible,” Baekhyun started to plan, already pulling out his phone to make a note of something.

Reaching out a hand, you covered his phone with your palm and pulled his attention back to you. “I do have a condition though,” you quickly declared, returning your hand back to your leg. “I know I can’t afford the full rent on this place but at least let me give you what I’m already paying for my current apartment. It’s not as much but at least I’m not getting something for nothing, it wouldn’t feel right.”

Baekhyun frowned, already shaking his head. “I don’t want your money,” he protested, just like you knew he would.

“You may not want the money but I can’t let you pay for an apartment like this, at least not without giving you something in return. I can’t imagine you need it so put the money in a savings account for Zoe if she decides to go to university,” you suggested. If he didn’t take the money, you’d never be able to move: the guilt would be too hard to bear.

His hand moved towards you, his delicate fingers brushing a strand of hair off your face. “We’ll set it up,” he promised, his soft pink lips stretching wide in a huge smile.

For the second time in the last six months, you were going to be packing up your life and moving once again. And you’d only just finished unpacking!

###

After a long and stressful day, you had officially moved into your new apartment. From the moment you woke up, you had been on the go, whether it was packing the last of your belongings or loading everything up into the van Baekhyun had hired only to have to unload it on the other side of the city. However, the furniture had been delivered, your boxes had been placed in the rooms they would eventually be unpacked into and you were starting to settle in.

Curling up on your new sofa with a glass of wine in your hand, you leaned your head back against your soft cushions and finally allowed yourself to relax after the long day of moving. There was still a mountain of unpacking to do but it could wait until tomorrow. All you wanted to do right now was enjoy some peace and quiet while Baekhyun gave Zoe a bath. You would deal with everything else tomorrow.

“I’m not quite sure who took the actual bath,” Baekhyun commented, walking into your living room with damp hair falling over his face and wet splotches all across his dark green t-shirt. He flopped down on the other end of the sofa with a heavy sigh.

Laughing lightly, you passed him his glass of wine from the coffee table. “Maybe I should get her into swimming lessons,” you joked, ruffling his fluffy hair off his forehead.

Baekhyun playfully slapped your hand away, only to grip it tight before you could move away completely and keep it in his lap. “I have something to ask you and I need to do it now before I chicken out,” he told you in his soft voice, suddenly very serious.

You straightened up and turned to face him properly on the sofa. “What’s wrong?” you asked, looking up at his nervous expression.

He slowly pulled his bottom lip in between his teeth before releasing and licking his pink lips, driving you quietly crazy with worry. “I was wondering if you’d like to go on a date,” he murmured in his wine glass, his dark eyes flickering up to your face before dropping to his lap.

Lost for words, you froze.

Five years ago, you would be screaming with happiness at the prospect of a date with Baekhyun but things were different now … more complicated. Of course you still had feelings for your old best friend. He was your first love and those feelings you had for him when you were both in school weren’t lost now you were older. However, dating Baekhyun then and dating Baekhyun now were two very different things: there was so much more to consider than just your feelings and his.

Like Zoe for example.

“I want to say yes,” you started softly, spotting Baekhyun peek a little look at you as you finally filled the silence in the room. “But we have to think about Zoe. What if things don’t work out between us, then how do we raise her? What she has right now is good and I don’t want to do anything to jeopardise that,” you explained, dropping your head so your gaze was fixed on your hand wrapped around Baekhyun’s.

You wished things were different, that life was simpler and you and Baekhyun and Zoe could be one happy family. However, the reality was that sometimes even the best intentions weren’t enough. You didn’t want to risk your daughter’s happiness just to indulge your heart.

Baekhyun moved closer up the sofa, leaning to place his wine on the coffee table. Then his gentle fingers were on your neck, moving to tilt your head up and force you to look at his warm chocolatey eyes. “Do you love me?” he asked, like it was simplest question in the world. “And I know when you’re lying,” he added as a warning.

Biting down on your bottom lip, you guiltily nodded your head. “I always have,” you told him, turning your head to try and shake yourself from his grip. His eyes staring into yours were making your heart ache for him. “But there’s no guarantee that it’ll be enough.”

“Can’t you just give us a chance?” he whispered, his fingers brushing little strands of hair off your face so he could cradle your cheek with his soft touch. “It’s just dinner. One dinner where we let our hearts lead and if it doesn’t work, then we put our feelings to rest and just focus on Zoe,” he attempted to persuade you, his long thumb tracing the cheekbone under your eye.

You could feel your resolve dissolving under his touch, your reasons for saying no getting stuck on your tongue as you stared at the desperate look in his eyes. For every argument you came up as to why it was a bad idea, your brain thought of another to shoot it down. It was only a dinner, nothing more if you decided. Zoe didn’t even need to know about it.

Didn’t you owe it to your heart for one last chance?

“I can’t do it,” you murmured, closing your eyes to savour the moment of his soft touch on your skin. You heard him exhale sharply and opened your eyes, your heart dropping at the sadness written all over his face. “I don’t have a babysitter for Zoe,” you added on, pinching your lips together to hide your smile.

His eyes flickered up to meet yours and the sadness on his features was instantly replaced with relief. “You’re a lot of trouble, you know that?” he teased, letting his hand fall away from your face while the other squeezed yours tight. “At least we know where Zoe gets it from.” He reached around to his back pocket and pulled out his phone.

You tried to pull your hand out of his but he only held on tighter, his focus still on his phone. “I wasn’t joking about the babysitter Baekhyun,” you told him, leaning your head back on your sofa.

“Lucky for us, Zoe has eight uncles who each owe me a favour,” Baekhyun replied, tapping his phone and holding it up to his ear. Whoever he was calling was slow to answer. “Hey, do you have any plans for tomorrow evening?” he asked once they eventually picked up. There was another long pause and Zoe plodding into the living room with her hairbrush and Mr Snuggles in her hands.

Finally managing to get your hand back from Baekhyun, you quickly placed your wine on the table and had Zoe sit in front of you like she always did so you could brush through the knots in her hair and tie it off into two cute braids.

“Would you mind looking after Zoe for the evening?” Baekhyun asked whoever he was on the phone with.

Your daughter’s head snapped to the right, confused as to what her father was talking about and where she was apparently going. When she switched her gaze to you, you shrugged your shoulders and turned her head back so you could finish brushing her hair.

“Thanks dude, I’ll talk to you later,” Baekhyun finished with a big smile on his face as he hung up.

You looked over at him as he stowed his phone away in his back pocket, waiting for him to explain what he was planning with raised eyebrows. Zoe turned her head too, a confused look on her face.

“How would you like to spend tomorrow evening with Uncle Jongin and Uncle Sehun?” Baekhyun asked, laughing as Zoe’s face lit up with excitement.

There was a heartbeat of silence and then Zoe burst to life, jumping to her feet and screaming at the top of her lungs, dancing around the room and throwing Mr Snuggles up in the air. “Yes, yes, yes, a million yes!” she exclaimed, throwing herself into Baekhyun’s arms and squeezing him as tight as she could. “I’m going to get him to sign everything!” she screamed, clapping her hands against her cheeks and then pretending to faint back onto the sofa.

Baekhyun looked over at you with a shyer smile. “Is that ok with you?” he asked a little bit timidly.

You pointed to your collapsed daughter and laughed. “Like I can say no after that.”

“Then it’s a date!”

###

Why were you so nervous?

It was just dinner with Baekhyun, something you had done so many times before, and yet this time was completely nerve-wrecking. You sat in your car, staring at the steering wheel while you took long calming breaths to help quell the butterflies in your stomach. It made no sense to be nervous but you couldn’t stop the shakes in your hands. This dinner felt like the fork in the crossroads: if it went well, it could be the beginning of you and Baekhyun officially, but if it went bad, who knew how it would affect your family?

Taking one last long breath, you checked your makeup in the mirror and grabbed your bag and scarf off the passenger seat, opening the door and bracing yourself against the cold winter winds. You wrapped yourself as best as you could and hurried up the pavement, following the directions on your phone until you came to a warm-looking restaurant decorated with white flowers and fairy lights. Baekhyun said that he knew the owner so they could have a private dinner without worrying about the press or fans interrupting. You gave your name at the desk and followed the waitress up some stairs to a private dining area with the table set for two and a beautiful view of the night’s sky.

As soon as you entered the room, Baekhyun got up from the table and hurried to help you out of your coat, hooking it on the back of your chair, which he held out for you like a gentleman. “You look beautiful this evening,” he murmured in your ear as you sat down, his lips stealing a little kiss on your cheek before he moved to sit opposite you.

“Thank you,” you muttered, hiding your blush behind your scarf as you slowly unravelled it from around your neck. Tucking both your scarf and your bag behind your back, you smoothed down your dark blue velvet dress and tucked your hair behind your ears. “You look very handsome too,” you replied.

And boy did he! His hair was styled messy but cute. He was wearing a crisp white shirt with the sleeves rolled up and the hem tucked into a fitted pair of navy pinstripe trousers. He had filled out well since his school days, turning into the breath-taking man before you with a dazzling smile that reached his eyes and could stop traffic.

“I got you a pink lemonade because I knew you were driving,” he said politely, indicating to the pale pink drink you’d missed in front of you. How did he still remember this as one of your favourites? You would always order it when you were hanging out in the café around the corner from school.

Taking a small sip, you smiled as the bubbles fizzed on your tongue. “I can’t believe you still remember these little things,” you commented shyly, picking up the menu to distract you.

Baekhyun reached across the table and pulled the menu out of your grip. “Don’t worry, I already ordered for you,” he bragged lightly, smirking as he hid the menu under the table.

“Ooh the ultimate test,” you retorted, raising your eyebrows. “Let’s hope you get it right or I’m out of here.”

In response, Baekhyun just confidently took a sip of his water and smirked.

“How was Zoe when you left her?” you asked, taking a moment to worry about your daughter. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust Jongin and Sehun with Zoe. You didn’t trust Zoe with them. By now she’d probably got them to sign every part of her body.

Baekhyun laughed, getting out his phone to show you a photo of your daughter cradling a fluffy white puppy with the biggest smile on her face. “Sehun brought his dog Vivi over from home and Zoe instantly fell in love. When I left, the three of them were trying to teach VIvi to do tricks,” he laughed, leaving his phone on the table face down.

You threw your hands up in mock annoyance. “Great, now she’s going to come home and want a puppy!” you sighed, running a hand through your hair.

“Jongin said he would call if anything happened,” he assured you, reaching across the table to take your hand. He intertwined his long fingers with yours and squeezed softly, his thumb caressing along your knuckles with a touch that had your nerve endings on fire. “Tonight is about you and I,” he murmured softly, locking eyes with you until your insides turned all gooey.

You couldn’t help but smile, your happiness radiating through your body leaving you warm and fuzzy. “Finally a first date,” you replied, holding your glass up to clink with his.

While you waited for dinner to arrive, you talked about anything and everything. Now you had moved into the new apartment, you were excited to get back to your art in your new studio in the third bedroom. Jokingly, Baekhyun put in a bid on your first painting. When dinner was served, you and Baekhyun had moved onto the upcoming duet he was working on.

As the waitress placed different dishes in front of you, your eyes widened and your mouth began to water. Baekhyun had basically ordered a table of all your favourites: sweet potato fries, grilled halloumi salad, sticky barbeque pork ribs, and mini hamburgers. Rolling your sleeves up, you stared at all the delicious food in front of you, not knowing where to start.

“Let’s eat,” you cheered, clapping your hands together.

There wasn’t a lot of talking while you ate, the pair of you too busy shovelling food into your mouths to do anything but moan in delight. Every time your eyes met Baekhyun’s, you couldn’t help but laugh. Both of you were acting as if you hadn’t eaten food in days … and it was half-true. You hadn’t eaten food this good in weeks.

When the plates were nearly empty, you dropped your cutlery on your plate and leaned back your chair, hands cradling your now full stomach. Baekhyun looked up from his plate licking the sticky sauce off his fingers and chuckling under his breath. “I thought girls ate little and less on their first date,” he commented.

You poked your tongue out and screwed your face up. “It’s better you know now what you’re getting yourself involved with,” you retorted, leaning over with your napkin to wipe a little bit of sauce off the corner of Baekhyun’s lips that had smeared up his cheek.

“Oh I have a pretty good idea already,” he laughed, puffing his cheeks out cutely while you gently rubbed the smear off.

Wiping the last hint of sauce of his soft skin, you sat back in your seat and smiled. Despite all your previous reservations, you were actually enjoying your date with Baekhyun. It wasn’t like normal first dates that were filled with awkward silences and trying to make the best first impression possible. You felt relaxed, as if it was just another dinner were your best friend.

Now you both had finished dinner, Baekhyun reached back across the table for your hand, melting you with his soft and warm gaze. “Are you happy we did this?” he asked in his gentle melodious voice. To reiterate his point, he brushed his thumb across the back of your hand and left your skin tingling.

“It’s been a surprisingly nice evening,” you replied, looking around the room and settling on the night sky. There were no clouds fogging up the midnight azure, allowing the twinkle of the thousands of stars shining through like little sparkling fairy lights. It was the perfect evening.

Then a knock on the door disturbed it all.

Reacting to the knock, you loosened your hand from Baekhyun’s and focused on your drink, looking down at your lap while Baekhyun called out for them to come in.

It was a man Baekhyun seemed to recognise, probably the owner of the restaurant. “I don’t know how but there are a few members of the press outside who heard you were eating here,” he explained in a rushed voice, looking very distressed at the news he had to give.

As soon as he spoke, your heart plummeted to the ground and reality hit you like a tonne of bricks. This was the exact reason why you didn’t want to date Baekhyun … because he wasn’t just Baekhyun anymore. You wanted to believe that your relationship with him could exist simultaneously but still separate from his idol life. However, it seemed impossible, like you were asking too much of the world.

In amongst your internal panic, you heard Baekhyun’s worried voice asked if there were any back doors you could slip out of. Apparently there was a fire exit they could access from a door on the right halfway down the stairs.

Once you heard the door click shut, you looked up at Baekhyun and sighed heavily. His shoulders were tense, his hands pushing through his hair and pulling at the little tufts of dark hair. “I’m so sorry this happened,” he murmured softly, squeezing his eyes shut and scrunching his face up.

The panicked feeling in your stomach bubbled up like a ticking bomb that was about to explode. “It’s always going to be like this, isn’t it?” you replied in a quiet voice, your hands clenched together in a white-knuckled fist. “No matter how private we try to be, you are an idol and this is the unfortunate side of your life.” There would always be people who wanted to report a story or a scandal and if you were in a relationship with Baekhyun, very little of your life - and Zoe’s too - would be private.

“Why do you sound so sad when you say that?” he asked in a shaky voice, peering up at you with a worried expression that broke your heart straight down the middle.

The love you felt for this man had stayed with you for five years but your love for your daughter trumped any and every other love in your life. She was your world and the only thing that mattered to you, even above your own happiness, was your daughter. You would even crush your own heart for her to have the chance at a normal and happy life.

“I don’t think I can do this,” you stuttered quietly, although your voice seemed to echo around the silent room. Saying the words out loud, tears began to gather in the corners of your eyes, stinging until they eventually fell and streamed down your face.

When you stole a glance up from your lap at Baekhyun, you saw the hurt expression on his face and had to pinch your lips together hard to stop the sobs from breaking out of your chest. He was looking at you in disbelief, like he couldn’t believe the words were coming out of your mouth. “I th-thought we were having a good time?” he asked, his usually happy voice now numb and monotonous.

“It was a lovely dinner,” you replied once you had regained a little bit of control over your emotions. “But the bubble has popped and this is our reality, hiding in dark corners and running out the back door. It’s not exactly the relationship that I want to have.” Your tears were falling down your faces like little waterfalls but you tried your hardest for your tears to be silent.

Baekhyun got up slightly from his seat, reaching over to pick your hand up from your lap and wrap his long fingers around the fist your hand was locked in. “I wish I could change things and make it easier but it comes with being an idol,” he tried to reason, his caressing touch stirring your feelings and making your tears fall harder.

You sniffed loudly, finally reaching up with your spare hand to wipe your wet cheeks. “But I’m not an idol,” you told him, your voice thick with emotion as the first sob hiccupped in your chest. “I’m sorry Baekhyun but I can’t do this.” Pulling your hand away from his gentle touch, you stumbled to your feet and started pushing your arms into your coat. The air in the room was suddenly hard to breathe and you knew you needed to get out of there.

Still sat at the table, Baekhyun propped his head up on the table with his elbows, his fingers buried in his messy hair. “Please don’t leave,” he pleaded, the words cracking with emotion as he spoke. “I love you so much, please don’t leave. I don’t want to lose you.”

His eyes found yours and the tears shining in his cemented your feet to the spot. A lump formed in your throat and you couldn’t speak or move, stuck just staring at the man you loved while your heart shattered more and more.

Baekhyun slowly stood up to face you, his hands tracing his touch down your arms until it found your hands. “I will do anything to keep you here in my arms. I only just got you back in my life. I can’t watch you walk out of it again.”

“You’ll still be able to see Zoe whenever you want,” you choked out between your silent sobs.

He shook his head, pulling you an inch closer so you could feel his hot breath fan out around your face. “I’m not talking about Zoe. I’m talking about you, about us.” He looked down at your hands wrapped around his. “I’m talking about this. I would do anything to keep you with me like this.”

Your bottom lip started to quiver. “Are you going to give up EXO?” you whimpered, pulling your hands out of his grip and taking a cautious step back.

That was the root of the problem, wasn’t it? You had to move apartments because he was an idol. You and Zoe were harassed on the streets because he was a member of EXO. You even had to keep your daughter a secret because Baekhyun was training to be an idol. Life would be perfect if Baekhyun wasn’t famous. You’d be a proper family if he wasn’t.

Despite your wishes though, he was Baekhyun of EXO … and his hesitation to answer told you everything you needed to know.

“We gave it a try but we can never have a normal relationship and that’s the all I want. We can never go on long walks along the river or go to the cinema and not watch the movie, not without people taking photographs and posting articles detailing private parts of our lives.” By now, your cheeks were streaked with tears and your chest heaved from crying, but still you moved to leave, buttoning up your coat with shaky fingers.

“You will always be Baekhyun of EXO first and that’s ok, but I can’t live my life like this,” you stammered, your voice breaking along with your heart. “I don’t want a relationship where I have to hide and be your dirty little secret that you sneak out the back door when no one’s looking.” You grabbed your scarf, frantically wrapping it around your neck as fast as you could. You just wanted to get out of there.

Meanwhile Baekhyun had stumbled back to his seat, his expression numb as he watched you prepare to leave.

Huffing in frustration at your scarf, you left it hanging lopsided and flipped your hair away from your face. “It’s hard enough keeping Zoe’s life normal with you as her father but with this, we only complicate it more. The person who will be hurt most by this mess in our lives is Zoe.” You wished he would understand and let you go.

However, he dropped his head for a second and ran his hands through his hair, before looking back up at you with a spark of fire in his eyes that told you he wasn’t going to give up easily. He threw himself to his feet, taking long strides towards you. His lithe hand reached up to cup your face, his fingers brushing the tears away. “Do you love me?” he asked in a low voice.

With his grip on your chin, there was nowhere to look but at his dark, tormented swirls of chocolate and caramel. Usually his intense stare would have you squirming on the spot, butterflies churning in your stomach. Now his stare only burned you and made your heart’s cracks inch deeper.

“I can’t,” you whimpered pathetically, squeezing your eyes shut so you didn’t have to watch his heart break right in front of you. Your own heartbreak was hard enough.

His hot breath blew out across your cheeks, making you gulp nervously at how close he was. Then suddenly his lips were on yours and all you could taste was salty tears – yours or his, you didn’t know. The kiss was desperate, each move begging you to stay with Baekhyun, to work it all out and face it together.

Your walls started to crumble and you started to believe in your wishful thinking … until your hands found his chest and sent him stumbling back slightly.

“I don’t love you Baekhyun,” you confessed on the spot, lying through your teeth. You hated yourself as soon as you said it, but your brain told you that the lie would help in the long run. This way he could get over you quickly and carry on with his life. It was for the best.

Raising your eyes off the floor, you saw Baekhyun on the brink, tears glistening in his eyes, lips pinched together like he was holding something in. The damage had been done, the hurt written all over his face and all your fault.

Your heart felt like it was going to crumble, the silence in the air choking you. It hurt to leave him like this but it would hurt even more if you stayed. You had to go.

“I’ll pick Zoe up in the morning,” you whispered, scared that any louder and you’d lose your last shred of composure and simply break down. And then you grabbed your bag and left, your heart cracking a little bit more with each step you took away from the only man you will ever love but could never be with.

Your final secret.

[masterlist]