#i just want to get to the bank T.T

[dragonbornoflegend]

radio ads have really tanked in tolerability the last few years huh

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia!

I just have to know- it's day six going into seven for Palmarosa. Contract part-two is in four days...

Do you see these next few chapters being explicit? Is Raphael truly intending to let Astarion see how life under contract is going to be, or is Raphael purposely holding back to lure Astarion into that next contract?

And, in your opinion, do you think that if Astarion truly sees Raphael at his cruelest towards him, he would be more comfortable signing a second? Able to know what the worst is instead of some nightmare he dreams up?

I love your story, and how you write Astarion. Thanks for your time!

It's still day 5!

I can't believe it's still day 5 in the contract, but it is, I'm writing a timeline and everything this time. So much has happened on this day, lmao.

(Chapters 13-18 all happen on the same day T.T)

I do think there's explicit content coming, but Raphael very much wants Astarion in that second contract, that being said, he's already cocked it up a few times already lmao. There's no guarantee he won't do that in other ways. I do plan writing-wise to get Astarion into that second contract though. Raphael oscillates between playing a very good long-game and then snapping and ruining his hard work, lol.

And, in your opinion, do you think that if Astarion truly sees Raphael at his cruelest towards him, he would be more comfortable signing a second? Able to know what the worst is instead of some nightmare he dreams up?

Raphael is not going to be his cruelest, and actually still isn't even though he does kind of lash out at Astarion in a very intense manner in the upcoming chapter. We've not seen Raphael at his worst. This is a guy who sees nothing wrong with keeping people in 'bones shattered in 100 places' levels of agony for hundreds of years. Even Raphael snapping is still Raphael not...giving himself to torture Astarion like he would an Eternal Debtor.

Astarion actually threatens to break the contract at the end of chapter 18 and through chapter 19. But...he hasn't yet.

Astarion has a lot of learned helplessness because of his experiences with Cazador. I imagine he had plenty of times to convince himself he was going to escape / find a way to beat the system etc. only to have all of that brainwashed and mind-read out of him. I am sure Cazador is the kind of person to know that someone will try and escape him and watch them try and then torture them for trying as a reminder that they are enslaved to him not just in body but in mind as well.

I don't think Astarion at this point is fully in contact with the part of him that knows he can walk away.

But also, Astarion accepted this first contract fully expecting to be raped and tortured regularly. He literally considered that and negotiated to make sure none of the torture caused permanent harm. This was a guy who negotiated a contract with stipulations based solely on expecting to be tortured/rape. From Astarion's perspective, Raphael hasn't actually done 99% of what Astarion expected him to do.

In some ways, that makes things harder for Astarion. Not knowing what to expect, and getting whole days where everything's uncertain but 'generally fine' followed by explosions of Raphael's temper etc. is like...still very hard for him to endure. But in a different kind of way.

I think Raphael's going to lay out the terms of the second contract very clearly soon, and Astarion will baulk simply because the terms of the contract will involve him doing two things he very much doesn't want to do. One goes against his personal ethics (and he's already refused to do it around Raphael once), and the second goes against his trauma history. And Raphael knows that. He isn't planning on tricking Astarion into that contract, he's banking on the idea that Astarion will still think the prize is worthwhile.

What I think Raphael is finding frustrating is that he had plans to introduce the concept of the second contract soon and Verillius came along and kind of ruined everything lmao. Raphael is pissed off for a lot of reasons right now. Can't a devil just manipulate a victim into a more high stakes contract in peace?

Unfortunately the Magic 8 Ball says no :D

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Ruined Plans

Words: 1,400

Pairing: KakaIru & YamaGai

Characters: Hatake Kakashi & Yamato

For: @animetrashmuffin who has had to wait for so long for me to produce anything even remotely cute for KakaIru, and instead of getting adorable KakaIru fluff got Kakashi feelings and Kakashi & Yamato friendship T.T

Eleven-fifteen to one P.M. was the time when Iruka’s classroom would be empty. His students would be off in other classes, and then enjoying their lunch break, leaving Iruka to relax for a bit before a hectic afternoon. Kakashi had committed that information to memory the first time Iruka mentioned it during a quiet morning coffee date and saved it for an important date in the future. 

That date was today.

He’d even made sure to confirm it that morning as Iruka crawled out of bed, just to ensure he wouldn’t be interrupting any of his boyfriend's classes when he popped in with the requested delivery of fresh vegetables from his garden. Vegetables that Iruka wanted to send home with his students.

With that bit of information tucked away in his memory banks, he spent his morning packing three boxes full of vegetables and left his house at Eleven A.M. on the dot. He’d even stopped at Ichiraku on the way to pick up some lunch for Iruka since he’d noticed that his wonderful boyfriend had forgotten his homemade lunch on the kitchen counter.

He could have brought the homemade lunch but decided instead to spoil Iruka a little. 

All that was left to do was carry everything to Iruka’s classroom.

An easy enough task, though he’d have to take one trip for each of the boxes, meaning a total of three trips back and forth between his truck and Iruka’s classroom.

“Think of it, Kakashi,” He muttered to himself while placing the Ichiraku bag on top of the first box and lifting it all off of the back of the truck. “He’ll be so impressed that you brought lunch. It’s such a thoughtful thing to do, and Iruka’s a sucker for thoughtful gestures.” If he was really lucky, Iruka would show his appreciation when they were back at his house later. 

Making his way to the front doors, he was surprised when they swung open and revealed Yamato standing there with a playful expression.

“Don’t,” he warned as he made his way past his old friend. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything.”

“Bullshit,” he huffed. “Shouldn’t you be in class?”

“Actually, I just got back from an appointment,” his friend chuckled. “I was about five minutes late to the start of class, but thankfully Iruka took over for me.”

Coming to a halt, Kakashi turned his gaze to Yamato. “Iruka?”

“Yes, Iruka,” Yamato confirmed. “Is that a problem?”

“No.” he stamped down the urge to scream. All of that planning went to waste because of Yamato. 

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Yamato chuckled. “I would take over from him, but for the first time in months, the kids look like they’re enjoying their lesson. It would be rude of me to barge in and interrupt that.”

“Says something about your teaching abilities,” Kakashi’s words earned him a sharp glare, but he didn’t care to apologize. Iruka was meant to be free for the period, not stuck in Yamato’s class making sure the students were behaving without the iron fist of fear hovering over their heads.

“You’re pouting.”

“I am not.”

“You are,” Yamato turned to face him and taped a finger against his nose. “Sad your boyfriend can’t come to hang out with you?”

“Wouldn’t you be?” He huffed.

“Well, yes, but I can always cuddle up with him at home,” he shrugged. “Which you can do as well, can’t you? Hasn’t Iruka moved in with you?”

“Well…” he thought back to the last five days. Even though Iruka still had his own place he had been spending most of his time hanging out at Kakashi’s. There was even some of his clothing in the closet, his toothbrush sitting in the toothbrush holder and even some instant ramen in the cupboards.

“Ah, you’re at that stage,” reaching out, Yamato grabbed the bag off of the top of the box Kakashi was carrying and grinned when Kakashi glared daggers at him for the offense. “Is that why you’re bringing him lunch? To butter him up for when you ask him to officially move in?”

“I am not trying to butter him up.”

“Mmmhmmm,” peering into the bag, he chuckled. “Oh, his favorite Ramen. That’ll get you into his good books for sure.”

Kakashi rolled his eyes. “I do not need to get into anyone’s ‘good books’,” he insisted. “Especially Iruka’s.”

“You could use a bit of help getting into my good books,” Yamato argued. “Really, you never spoil me Senpai. When was the last time you even paid for lunch when we went out?”

“Isn’t it Gai’s job to spoil you?”

“One: Not the point. Two: Gai is the one who needs spoiling. The only thing he spoils me in is love.”

“Which is exactly what you need spoiling in,” finally reaching Iruka’s classroom, Kakashi peered in through the little window in the door. It was a pointless endeavor, but part of him hoped Iruka had ditched Yamato’s class and returned to his own room so that Kakashi might still be able to spend some time with him. Unfortunately, that was not the case.

Iruka’s room was devoid of any life.

“Now you just look pathetic,” Yamato sighed when Kakashi glanced his way. “Really, you look like a kicked puppy, Senpai.”

“I do not,” he protested, though the slight whimper in his voice was a dead giveaway that he was a liar. 

“Yes, you do,” Pointing to the spot directly beside the classroom door, he rolled his shoulders and grunted when they popped. “Put that down and I’ll help you with the next load. After that, we can go get a cup of coffee to lift your spirits.”

A smile tugged at the edges of Kakashi’s lips. “You paying?”

“After all of these years,, I would never be foolish enough to think that you would actually offer to pay, Senpai.”

“Rude.”

“But true,” Yamato asserted. “Oh, and you can leave the Ramen in his office. It should be unlocked.”

“But,” glancing toward the office, he sighed. After all the care he’d taken in planning out his afternoon, he was left with no satisfying outcome. Iruka wasn’t in his classroom waiting for a cute midday lunch date, and now he was being dragged away to coffee by one of his best friends. 

“Relax,” Yamato groaned. “I’ll make sure you’re back in time for lunch. That way you’ll get at least an hour with him before afternoon classes start.”

An hour with the most wonderful man he’d ever had the privilege of meeting.

It wasn’t exactly what he had planned, but Kakashi couldn’t help but feel a bit happier at the thought of returning to find Iruka surrounded by boxes of fresh vegetables with a bowl of warm Ramen sitting on his desk waiting to be devoured.

There was only one thing that could make it better.

“Tenzo,” he turned to his friend with a brilliant smile. “I couldn’t trouble you for a little something, could I?”

“More than me paying for your coffee?” Yamato huffed. “I would rather not, but I could be persuaded to help you out.”

“Persuaded?” Kakashi arched an eyebrow. “For what?”

“Well, my kitchen could always use some garden fresh vegetables. Gai loves cooking his curries with the freshest vegetables he can find.” his friend mused. “And I can see that you’ve already harvested some of your vegetables.”

“Of course you can. They’re sitting right in front of you.”

“Don’t get smart with the man buying your coffee.”

Lifting his hands up in front of him, he chuckled. “Alright, alright. You want some vegetables. I can do that,” there were, after all, lots of vegetables left even after his donation to Iruka’s students. Paying the bills wouldn’t be a problem for him and he did usually prefer to give away as much of the food as possible so that none of it went to waste.

“Good,” Turning his back to him, Yamato started back down the hallway. “Drop the Ramen off on Iruka’s desk and come grab the last load of vegetables. Then we’ll head to the cafe.”

Watching his friend walk away, Kakashi sighed.

It wasn’t exactly what he had planned for his afternoon, but spending time with his friends was something he always considered a bonus with how busy his work on the farm could get.

[nya-vivi]

thank you for the answer! i was the anon who asked you about 4* and sethos (maybe I'll use this emoji 🛸 so you can identify me easier)

Sorry I'm replying late as well, life is hectic 😭😭

And omg you main Noelle??? what's your build? i'm trying to build her again since i used her at the start of the game and didn't take her past lvl 60... She deserves better 😭

AND I ALSO LOVE GAMING OMG HE TOOK MY HEART. I literally c6-ed him and spend so many primos on him 😭😭 that's ok tho he deserved it. I also love Chongyun he's my special son. Got him at the start of the game so he was my first main 🥺 alongside him my faves are heizou, fischl, yanfei, gaming, faruzan, layla... well theres many of them lol. and recently sethos! I love his dynamic with everyone. Actually sumeru characters feel like family it might be my fav region for that. I was shocked when he had bigger connection to scara. I love the black cat and golden retriever dynamic they kinda have going on and their parallels.

also yes please do a favorite character list i would love to see it!

Have a nice day and sorry for the shorter reply. It's just I'm busy 😭 maybe I can send you more asks next week when I'll have more time. If you don't mind that's it. Or maybe I could stop being anon.

Hello 🛸 Anonie!! I'm super sorry for the super late response T-T I have already addressed it in one post, but I have been super busy filling and paying for my next year (banks are truly my no. 1 public enemy,,,), a few trips back and forth to see friends (I stayed in a place with minimal internet signal for more than a week TnT, among other trips) and doing a lot of house chores because all my household members except for me are working, so I clean all the house (which I don't mind, but there's a lot of work and too much heat T.T and I end up in my bed after everything lol).

I do main Noelle! I went to see my stats and realized I have to get her a better crit rate percentage because she does so much crit dmg... I use 4p Husk of Opulent Dreams + Prototype Archaic (I have seen guides saying that Whiteblind is better, so I might sacrifice my lvl. 90 Prototype Archaic for Whiteblind and change one piece of my artifacts so it has better rate,, choices choices) I will add images below cut!!

To preface this, I am not a meta player so take my opinions with a grain of salt lolol

So much dmg,, so little rate,,,,,,, I usually take whatever piece to add that element dmg, in this case Gladiator.

My favorite region is def Mondstadt, but Sumeru is my second one!! I like all the character dynamics and exploration in Sumeru, both rainforest and desert (unpopular opinion, it seems (≧∇≦)/) also the lore?? Absolutely fantastic. And Sethos? He has been incorporated to the fave characters very quickly, I loved his interactions with Cyno and whatever he has going on with Wanderer lolol Like wise, I loved Gaming, such a cutie and honestly a real good guy, he became one of my favorites very soon.

I ended up making a ranking with only four stars (as to make it fair), but only lore/storytelling wise, since meta is dead anyways (/j) and how hoyo managed their reveal and relevance (?) I think seeing the rankings will explain mostly everything but if you have any questions please feel free to ask!!

(I want to say that I like all the characters, I am a person who finds it east to love characters lol)

In no particular order, except for Noelle and Xingqiu, who are the uncrowned queen and king of my heart and party and Xinyan. Pls hoyo release my queen from hoyo jail. Criminal that they did a event about music and my girl wasn't in it.

I have to say that I am guilty of not doing most of the hangouts, so my ranking can change after them. I foresaw me being tired from playing genshin, so I am only hyperfocusing on the characters that are more interesting to me first and when this gaming block disperses, I am going to do the hangouts and enjoy them lol

IT'S ME WHO IS SORRY ╥﹏╥ I kept this ask for sooo long ajdkashjashda pls send me more asks, I love reading and answering them 👉👈❤ they are very fun!

On my side, I don't mind if you want to stop being anon! I would love to interact with more people from the genshin comunity, even if it is a bit scary❤ so take your time and do as you wish, I will be happy either way 🤭

[elio-monroe]

tiktok, after years of having me banned, reinstated my account out of nowhere and just suggested it to one of my co-workers :| but at least that meant i could finally get back in and delete it with my own fucking hands this time.

fuller story below. nsfw a bit i guess

basically had a tiktok to promote my very small onlyfans. which i had to try and offset unemployment (that i couldn't get paid for due to not techinically being unemployed bc i was a part-time government employee and techinically the government never shut down) the, at the time, epidemic was causing with me and my partner. it was going okay, pretty much as well as i could have wanted it to go while staying low profile.

had some issues with insta occasionally flagging me as a child, but i could usually get that resolved quickly. and then one of the most annoying guys i've ever been talked at came at me. wouldn't accept that i wouldn't give him shit for free. kept insisting because i wouldn't give him stuff for free that i must be a kid (but still kept asking even after he had come to that conclusion!), and proceeded to report every last one of my socmed accounts as csem. despite how easily i could disprove this, seems every place decided that since it was a real human reporting me and not a bot they took the guys site and just took down everything of mine. including my onlyfans (even though they had my id and ssn on file, as well as my bank account).

wasn't able to get any of the money out of my onlyfans (which seems they've kept up the account and pictures but i can't get in anymore).

i just kinda let myself be beat because there literally wasn't anything i could do. proof that im an adult wasn't going to cut it for whatever reason. i never really talked about this with ben, just said it was over and i wasn't doing it anymore. it was just like one day, even a couple hours and everything i had worked on was gone. i was too tired and upset that once again, no one listened to my side of things and just listened to... well the world always listens to awful men who don't get their way.

weird that tiktok reinstated my account tho out of the blue. but apparently it was just my two sfw videos of machi. still took it down tho bc my onlyfans was kinda linked to it, and all my coworkers have my number, so idk how many might have seen that. hopefully it was just the one, she is pretty chill about it all and im thankful she reached out to me.

i was going to post some really good bondage photos too later that day T.T. oooh well, glad onlyfans didn't get their grubby hands on them anyways. idk how online sexworkers live, i hear bdsm isn't even really allowed on there anymore (unless you are a young white girl at least). im sure at some point onlyfans will ban all nsfw content because they'll have enough money to survive on those weird vaguely sexual yoga or cooking videos that appeal to all those tradcath types.

[snoodledoodles]

Looking for snake advice

Hello friends! I’m going to college next year and I need some help! I will be able to take apep with me(he’ll stay at my sister’s until I get my own housing). Unfortunately, it will be really expensive and labor intensive to ship his tank down there. I’m looking for somewhere where I can buy him a new enclosure(hopefully an upgraded one) that isn’t super expensive. I’d like one of the ones that open from the front so that I can install RHPs instead of the CHEs I have now. Something around the size of an animal plastics T8 or T12 would be about right. The only issue is that AP cages are pretty spendy. Rn the T8 is on sale and costs $165 which is probably about my price range, but I’d need to buy it late this summer/early fall and it probably won’t be on sale when I need it. Do you guys know of anything that might work? 

[sukratyaropia24]

It's currently 12:57am rn and I can't sleep....

Having this brainrot rn...

Imagine....

Making playable characters npcs in your server!

Like imagine you get this character, I'm choosing diluc cuz I love him so much, and like you now get to see him around monstadt.

Like you get to have this character as a npc in your world because you have this character unlocked EVEN BETTER IF YOU HAVE THEIR SKIN UNLOCKED TOO WKDJQKSJ

Example...

Depending on the time, it'll depend on where they are.

Diluc can be seen either in the tavern, in or out of Dawn winery or even around the outskirts of the city.

Xiao can be seen in the outskirts of Wangshun Inn or on the rooftop of the Inn.

Albedo either in the Knights of Favonius Hq or in his lab at Dragonspine.

Kaeya either in the tavern or in the Knights of Favonius Hq.

Venti either in the Tavern as well or on the giant tree in Windrise.

Zhongli walking around Liyue Harbor or even in that table thing on top of the mountain(Idk where it is im sorry)

Childe either in Northland bank, around the outskirts of Liyue Harbor or even in Dragonspine.

Ningguang inside the jade chamber.

Beidou in the harbors of Liyue or in one of her ships or in the crux fleet alongside Kazuha who can be seen either in Ritou, in the crux fleet or even in the city of Inazuma.

Thoma who can be seen around the Kamisato estate, Ritou and in Inazuma city.

Itto can be found around the outskirts of the city alongside Kuki Shinobu.

And more!

I just want this to happen cuz I wanna see Diluc everytime I logged in the game T.T

Hoyoverse pls answer our calls, I am on my knees.

Summer Out!

[jjpogue]

❝Something Different — t.t

Summary:  in which you and topper bond over your romantic troubles and end up sleeping together.

Request: “Hey can you please do a Topper from Outer Banks imagine where y/n is a pouge and she is the bad ass of the group and she doesn’t really like to show her emotions she had a crush on jj but sees the way he looks at kiea so one night she is at the beach alone drinking and topper happens to be there too and they talk about their heartbreak they end up sleeping together and slowly start liking eachother” - anon

Pairing: Topper Thornton x reader 

Length: 3.2k words!

Warnings: 18+ smut, public sex, angst & feels, 

[ not my gif ] 

The rays of the sun beat down on your skin, making every inch warm. You had a pretty defined tan line, showing off the shadows of your favorite bikini to surf in. When you weren’t with the pogues or working your job on the cut, you were out on the waves. It felt like home to you, more home than land ever felt like. The salt in the breeze made you feel alert. The sheer raw power of the waved flowed into you and made you feel like this was your world, and everyone else was just living in it. 

Feeling the sand between your toes and the current pulling at your ankles rhythmically was grounding, it was exactly what you needed right now to feel calm. Handling emotions had never been your strong suit, that was true. And seeing the way JJ was looking at her — it was too much for your vulnerable heart to handle right now — you had to get away. It was foolish to be so affected by it, let it get to you and fill you with the insecurities you tried to push away. But it was that silent breaking point which you’d reached. And now you were looking out at the tangerine sunset with watery eyes. 

The scene was picturesque and melancholy. You had stripped down to your bikini top and board shorts, wading into the water which reflected the glitters of the fading sun. Sinking down, the ocean reached up to your shoulders, enveloping you in its thick atmosphere. A gentle pressure that wrapped around your whole body like a hug. 

Why did you like JJ so much to begin with? He was a fellow pogue and it was against the hallowed rules to mingle amongst other pogues. Yet it seemed that was a less strictly guided rule than others. All the boys had a thing for Kie, and a part of you resented her for it. A toxic jealousy that simmered in the pit of your chest. The feelings you only let come forth in your worst of times; the devil on your shoulder whispering the sins your mind wouldn’t normally conjure.

Sighing, you close your eyes and leaned back, letting your body go slack to float on the surface. The gentle tide carried you back and forth and lulled you back into a secure place as it always did when you needed it. But it was too much to ask for prolonged peace. 

“Hey pogue!”

You snapped back to the present and stood up in the water, droplets dripping down you in rivers. And it was none other than Topper Thornton and his stupid frosted tips swaggering across the beach towards you. He wore a red polo top and tan shorts, a pair of sunglasses hanging precariously on the button of his nose to complete the “I’m a rich privileged kid” look. He was carrying a blue cooler in one hand and had a smirk plastered across his face. “All alone, princess?”

You sneered at him and narrowed your eyes, “What the hell do you want, kook?”

He set down the cooler in the sand and knelt down beside it, pulling out a brown beer bottle. He snapped his eyes up to meet your and his smirk only grew cockier, “Peace offering? I’m not here to start anything, I promise.” 

You raised a brow, refusing to move closer. “This feels highly suspicious, you’re aware of that right? Swear you’re not here to pull something?”

“Cross my heart.” He cracked open the beer and tipped it up to his lips, a trail of golden amber liquid dripping down from the corner of his lips and off his chin. He wiped it away after his swig and gestured to you, “Coming out of there, princess?”

“Stop calling me that.” You crossed your arms, trudging through the water and back to the beach. You snatched one of his beers from the cooler and opened it off the piece of driftwood you used to hang your clothes on. You let the cool liquid flow down your throat and soothe the bile that had been creeping up. And in the moment it felt like a great solution to your troubles to finish the whole bottle in one go, tossing the bottle aside when you were finished. 

Topper stared at you with widened eyes before composing himself, “You good?”

“None of your business, kook.” You bit back at him, turning to sit yourself on the driftwood with your arms once again crossed defensively. Why was Topper here and what was his ulterior motive? He obviously wanted to tease and taunt you; pull on your hair and kick sand at you. But you were feeling resentful of your fellow pogues and didn’t care about your loyalties, not right now.

Topper shrugged and nursed his beer, sitting a few feet away on the driftlog. You went back to watching the sky, turned into deep crimson brush strokes and speckles of white clouds. You almost forget Topper was there until he had to speak back up. 

“Sarah broke up with me.”

You looked over at him and sniffed, “And? You’re an asshat. It’s about time she ought to see that.”

“Gee thanks, it’s not as if I’m not right here.”

“Well what do you honestly expect me to say? Am I supposed to like you after all the shit you and your goons have pulled on us? That just shows how entitled and sheltered you are.”

“No, I don’t. But I don’t know, you’re here and I just want to talk to someone about it. Rafe and Kelce just make fun of me and they’re suppose to be my friends, my mom doesn’t give a fuck and,” Topper sighed in exasperation and slumped his shoulders, his elbows rest upon his knees, “it feels nice to just have someone listen.”

You hated the fact you softened at his words and his vulnerable blue-gray eyes. You bit your lip and met his eyes, “Okay. I’ll listen.”

Topper hummed and relaxed his shoulders, you could see the gears working in his head, the way his gaze rove over the beach without purpose and how his lip was worked between his teeth.

“I love Sarah — or loved her? — and it feels like it’s all my fault she’s gone. I could only think of her and nothing but her. I was so hyper focused on every little thing I didn’t like, it made me so angry and I didn’t even realize how out of control it was getting before it was too late. And then to see her with John B? Cheating on me? It hurt so much and I let it get out of control. I didn’t mean for John B to fall, honestly.” Topper ran his hands through his hair and pulled on it, his fingers tangling in the tresses. “But it’s too late to apologize.”

“I... I don’t blame you for that. It was an unfortunate accident. And,” you sighed and you didn’t know exactly what compelled you. But it felt right and you moved to sit right beside Topper and carefully set your hand on his back. He stiffened but don’t protest. “I didn’t know she cheated on you. That’s a shitty thing to do to anyone.”

Topper didn't respond, and you took a moment to look him over. The last glow of the setting sun had his face illuminated in neon reds and oranges, his brow scrunched together and his jaw set tight. You took your hand and gently ran circles on his back, hoping it would bring Topper some comfort. But you had never really spoken to him before, much less act as emotional support and you had no idea what you were doing. This was wholly new territory and it was scary- you were going to do something wrong. You still didn’t exactly like Topper but you were disliking him less than before. He had humanity to him and you understood the gravity of Topper letting you see this side of him. So it only felt fair you joined him. He was right, there is comfort to be had in telling your woes to one who has no bearing to judge you on. Just an ear to listen and an open mind. 

“For the longest time,” Topper lifted his head to your voice, his misty eyes looking to you curiously. You smiled weakly to him and then once again looked back out to the sea. The sky was getting darker every minute and the sea was turning black and mysterious. “I’ve had a crush on JJ. The kind of innocent crush that makes you feel all giddy and silly and as if you’re floating on cloud nine, wherever that is. And no, I never acted on it. So I know I have no right to feel the way I do. But I’m only human and I can’t exactly control it, right? So I feel jealous and upset he’s interested in someone else. And what am i going to do? Just bottle it up and move on. Because that’s what I’ve always done and I’m a creature of habit. So trust me, you’re not the only one with a broken heart. The way he looked at her? God, it was as if she were the only one there. And I can’t feel happy for them because all I can think about is my own hurt feelings. At least, look at me like a friend that you love, that’s what I want.  He didn’t really cheat on me, he doesn’t even know. But it’s shit, all the same. Being a teenager sucks, and being in love sucks even more.”

You finally looked back at Topper, his pale eyes looking right into yours with such depth and reverence. 

“What?” You breathed out, feeling small and vulnerable and confused. 

And he kissed you, softly as first with a hand on your cheek and fingers in your hair but it quickly progressed into something deeper and more intimate than that. He bit on your lip and grasped for his hip, pulling you into his lap despite the wet state of your shorts, you were both too engrossed to care. All your senses were invaded and overloaded with him. It was wrong but you didn’t care. Connection, understanding, and emotional vulnerability driving you to give into him. He held you close and every trace of his skin on yours sent jolts of electricity and excitement though your body and you could feel the full, immense sensation of arousal settle in your hips. You hadn’t laid in bed with another in months and that yearning hadn’t come back until now. 

Your lips broke apart and you gasped as Topper bit on your ear, licking and kissing along the side of your neck. You wrapped your arms tight around his neck and buried your face in his soft hair which smelled faintly of cologne and the sweet chemicals of his shampoo. “What are we doing?” You whispered to him. You were scared, excited and so terribly aroused all at the same time.

He squeezed the soft flesh of your hip and pressed one more kiss to the dip of your collarbone, “What feels right.” He replied simply, as if it was the most obvious thing. Maybe it was when you stopped letting all these mixed feelings battle inside you. Fully give yourself away to the present here and now and take comfort in the warm body you were wrapped in. 

“Well we can’t stay out here. What if someone sees us like this?” You pulled back to look across his face, admiring the tiny bit of baby stubble on his chin and the smooth slope of his nose. The tiny sun-dotted freckles under his eyes and the faint rosiness of his cheeks.

“They see us then they’re getting a nice show.” Topper smirked, slapping your ass playfully. “It’s getting dark, they won’t see us anyways.”

“Hey! No tha-” Topper silenced you with a blisteringly hot kiss, and you were so caught by surprise you couldn’t control the whining moan that resonated in your throat. You could feel Topper’s hands trailing up along your spine till it reached the bow of your bikini, tugging at the strings till it came apart and fell slack. He went and undid the bow around your neck next and the small garment came off, you tossing it aside to the sand. You broke apart, gasping and panting headily. You watched Topper admire your chest, confidence bubbling up inside of you. 

“It’s okay to touch them,” You guided him, speaking softly. He nodded slowly and his hands reached up to cup them, squishing the mounds in his strong fingers. You blushed and bit your lip when Topper grew emboldened, kissing each of your breasts and nipping at your nipples. You set a hand on his shoulder and closed your eyes, reveling in the new feeling. 

“It”s good?” He looked up at you with soft eyes and you melted under that look. One of so much care and attention. 

“Yeah..” you nodded dumbly, feeling drunk off the feeling, and maybe the beer you chugged earlier was helping. “I wanna suck your cock.” You were surprised with your bluntness and Topper seemed to be so as well before he quickly recovered, helping you down off his lap and spreading his legs apart. 

You hummed, helping pull his shorts off, leaving him in his tightened briefs. The noticeable bulge was enticing enough you wrapped your lips around the mound, sucking and wetting the fabric with your tongue. Topper’s eyes fluttered and he gasped, “Fuck- don’t tease me like that.”

You giggled and relented, peeling his briefs back, his hard cock popping out and standing to attention. He was of fairly normal size with a slight curve to the shaft. You took hold of him and looked up to him with lusty eyes, putting your lips to the shaft and pressing sweet kisses to the velvety form. Topper let out a euphonious moan, biting his cheek to keep it quiet. You had barely started and he was already so affected, it made you wonder how many blowjobs he had had before, if any. 

You licked a stripe up to the tip and Topper shuddered, his hands grasping the driftwood on either side of him to keep himself grounded, his eyes watching you. You twirled your tongue around the tip and purred at the taste of his precum, a little sweet and tangy. You finally took his cock into your mouth, leaning in to take it all the way in, the head pressing against the back of your throat. You closed your eyes and moaned, the vibrations adding to Topper’s pleasure, one hand reaching out to grasp some of your hair- tight and a little painful. But it was easily ignored by the second hand pleasure. Your enjoyment of bringing the kook to a trembling horny mess. You bobbed your head up and down, hallowing your cheeks and running you tongue against him each time you went down on him. 

“C’mere,” Topper pulled you back and off his cock, a string of saliva still connecting you to the member before it broke. You licked up the sticky line from your lip and grinned, a lightness filling your chest as how easily he was able to lift you to his lap. His arm muscles flexing and contracting as he exercised his strength was so ridiculously hot in this situation. “Wanna cum in that pretty pussy.” He groaned out, his voice coated in a gravely deep timbre. 

You gasped as he practically ripped your little shorts off you, fiddling with them as they were caught on your knees but he was quick to leave them and flip you around. Your back was arched against his firm chest, it was obvious he worked out.

You could feel his cock pressing up against your ass and you rubbed your thighs in anticipation. He was being grabby and panting heavily in your ear, feeling up your tits and thighs. “So sexy with my dick in your mouth huh? Wanna feel your pussy now..” He grasped his cock in one hand and pushed it to rub against your lower lips, squelching from all the wetness you’d accumulated. 

“Please,” you whined, holding onto his thighs and shuddering. Your back arched more, chest pushing out as your whole body was high strung in tension. You could feel the head push against you, pushing back and forth till it caught on your entrance and you held your breath. 

“Ready princess?”

“Yes, yes, please.” 

He snapped his hips and you jolted forward, crying out a muffled sound. All you could hear was the gentle roll of the waves and the slap of skin on skin as Topper rut into you, finding his rhythm. You leaned back into him, rolling your hips back to meet him each time and it only enhanced the pleasure. You both matched pace and were met as one, bodies connected in that most intimate way. The rising moon illuminated your wet skin and it glistened a bluish-white hue. 

Topper quickened his pace and held you tighter, “Fuck, (y/n).” It was the first time he had said your name that night and it made you fall over the edge, reaching down to play with yourself, rubbing tight little circles on your bud. 

The combined pleasure was enough for you to feel the familiar tightness inside, a dull throbbing that soon was lit aflame when your deepest reaches and most sensitive spots were grazed, causing you to combust in Topper’s arms and cum on his cock. He smirked and kissed behind you ear, “That good, baby? I’m gonna cum soon too, such a good, tight, little pussy squeezing me..” 

He held your hips firmly against his and stood, turning so you could hold onto the driftwood as he began pounding you from behind. You let your head hang, ass in the air. Topper slapped your cheeks, causing them to blush, red and raw. “Just like that, princess.” 

You were only more aroused by his praises, more wetness dripping out past his cock as he brought his hips flush to yours one last time. He groaned and gripped your flesh tight, little crescent lines left by his nails. You could feel his cum spurt inside you, the white dribbling out of you and mixing with the sand below. Topper exhaled and pulled out as his cock started to soften. “Holy shit.”

You thighs shook a little as you stood back up straight, grinning at Topper over your shoulder, “You’re certainly better than I expected, Kook.” 

He rolled his eyes and knelt to help you retrieve your clothes, offering them up to you. You smiled and mumbled a small thanks as you redressed, trapping his dripping cum in with your shorts. You were on the pill so you weren’t worried about it. Topper pulled you back to him, his boxers and shorts back in place. 

“I don’t want to leave things here, is that wrong?” He asked quietly, rubbing your arms.

“I don’t think so.” You blushed, “I didn’t expect this to happen but I’m glad it did.”

He smiled down at you, “Same.” 

“So... my place?” You offered, already thinking about a round two. Your whole body tingling in excitement. Topper only offered you a wide smirk but you knew that to mean a “yes”.

A/N: hoooly shit this was a ride to write out. I haven’t written smut in months and I hope I’m not too rusty at it. Anyways I hope my interpretation of Topper is good, I want to flesh him out more than he is in the show, thats what he deserves haha

MASTERLIST

If you want more content like this my ask box is always open!

I love getting comments and feedback so please consider it ^^

[dreamescapeswriting]

also lmaooo felix being a sweet vampire who tries not to bite people 😭😭

i can picture him being like “i don’t like drinking people’s blood. i have decided to be vegetarian”

“...felix you can’t do that”

“i know it’ll be hard but i wanna try”

“no you literally can’t. you will die”

“oh”

“....you know you can drink animal blood, right? or get blood from blood banks”

“oh wait i forgot about that. thank god!! i kinda hated the thought of eating broccoli everyday😭”

or like if someone’s scared of him he’ll get offended cause he just wanted to be nice and say hi and they’re screaming and telling him not to kill them.

😭😭😂😂 please i can already picture Chan trying to be strict with him but dying halfway through his sentences because he can't take it seriously...Meanwhile Minho and Changbin are telling him how he could totally do it 😭😭😭

He'd just be standing there like "well thats rude, I was just trying to be nice." While holding a little box of cookies or brownies for the new next door neighbours that had moved in

PLEASE I WANNA WRITE A SMAU WHERE THEY'RE VAMPIRES T.T

[yep-ishouldbesleeping]

(not really)small Magne theory

All right boys and gals, I’ve come up with a little theory, and it’s a sad one that revolves around hero society being kinda fucked up.

Maybe it won’t make sense, maybe it will, strap on.

According to the Wiki, Big Sis Magne ( God bless her, may she rests in peace) is wanted for nine armed robberies, three murders, and twenty-nine attempted murders.

The last number never really made too much sense to me.

Now the question is: how did she fuck up so many times in trying to kill someone? She’s shown to be very capable, a quick-thinker, very strong and very, very dangerous if she wants to.

She killed at least three times for fuck’s sake! Why did she fail so many other times?

Some attempted murders might be consequencial to the armed robberies, but I wouldn’t count on it. 

In a world where heroes are everywhere, it’s safe to say that more populated and richer areas probably have a higher number of capable heroes patrolling, so say a bank or a famous downtown jewelry would be harder to rob. 

A villain on the run would probably avoid these areas in favour of less populated ones, where the risk of being caught/ending up in a fight with a hero is minor, and civilians usually don’t really fight back. None gets hurt.

But ok, let’s say that at least two people end up severely hurt in every one of her armed robbery, so eighteen counts of attempted murder. That still leave eleven attempted murders who are just kinda there.

Magne isn’t shown to be a blood-thirsty psychopath or a completely insane criminal, she looks rather chill, so I guess that she wouldn’t kill or even attack unless necessary. And if she does want to kill, she can clearly very well succeed.

So what happened? Well, I think they spiked up the number to make her appear less human. 

Maybe they changed the crime of assault, a ‘’lesser’’ crime, with attempted murder. So say she shoves someone out of the way during an escape and they get hurt, it’s attempted murder. Knocks someone out? Attempted murder. Causing harm in any way, shape or form? Attempted murder. Even though it’s clear that she never had the intention to kill.

The more guilty one looks, the less human. And when a hero finally gets them, the more respected and popular they will be.

None is going to question the system, if the system rids society of (what the public thinks is) a monster. None cries for monsters.

None cries for someone who has killed three times and has attempted so many other times. It doesn’t matter that she maybe killed in self defence and that she gets charged with a more serious crimes. None even knows!

Obviously this is not to say that she’s uwu innocent did nothing wrong. She should pay, she should be in jail (if she weren’t dead the poor thing T.T you’ll be missed Sis). But I think that she should have the right to a fair trial, especially in a society that is said to be a utopia.

[aditooo]

Sydney lockdown extended till October... BRUH how long do I have to pay rent on a room I am not living in T.T

I want to just figure out how to move all my things to storage and end my lease - this is ridiculous aiyoooo

Literally thousands of dollars on, essentially an expensive storage unit at this point.

Also, a friend referred me to another two jobs in the banking sector, both which pay a LOT better than what I am getting now. Have applied for both. The work is different to what I am doing now, but I have solid experience in that area and know I could kill it in those roles. Fingers crossed! (Also one of the jobs may potentially let me work in the Melbourne team)

PSA: If you haven't already - click on the google logo today guys - it's so cool!

[coreastories]

Royal Exclusive: Their Majesties are as sweet as cake and you need strong tea for this

Bad news: There’s been a breach in the palace IT 

Very good news: The breach has been resolved, and we’re in for a treat

Today’s edition was delayed because of special circumstances 

Several days ago, we received a dubious tip about a leaked video chat between the king and queen. We received image files and a transcript

This author isn’t an idiot, so we opened nothing, reformatted our entire fleet of devices, and sent the entire package to the Royal Public Affairs Office

Blissful reward! Today, the Royal Public Affairs Office sent the package back, giving us exclusive rights and thanking us for alerting them to the security breach

Once again, this author had to scream in the powder room

As you can see, dear reader, the queen is using a laptop. Somehow, somewhere, the laptop had been infected/hacked 

We hope this was the only breach into Her Majesty’s privacy

This author thinks so anyway, because what you’re about to read is indeed a transcript of a video chat between the king and queen

And we know they’ve only been parted once so far, when the king went to Sweden (See: Modern Royals: The protocol of touch) 

Perhaps the deflection of attention from Lady Seo-gyeong continues. 

Or, perhaps the palace is deflecting our attention from something precious by feeding us delectable crumbs. 

In the king’s recent, also exclusive interview, this author asked him what the queen loves about him. And this author noted that the queen blushed to the roots of her hair while the king gave a rather too smooth answer. 

You’re about to see why. 

And I must say, this is such a delicious glimpse into the queen’s personality. No wonder the king is absolutely smitten. 

Without further ado, enjoy! 

HM The King: “Why are you still up? You should be sleeping.” 

HM The Queen: “I don’t know. I can’t sleep.”

HM The King: “Maybe you miss me?” 

HM The Queen: “Don’t be silly. You just left.” 

HM The King: “I miss you.” 

HM The Queen: “Have you eaten?”

HM The King: “Yes. What did you have for dinner? Who cooked?”

HM The Queen: “…”

HM The King: “Jeong Tae-eul. Did you make Jang-mi cook something forbidden?”

HM The Queen: “No.” 

HM The King: “Jeong Tae-eul-- you--” 

HM The Queen: “I went to the bank today.” 

HM The King: “What?” 

HM The Queen: “I was taking a walk and--”

HM The King: “You were taking a walk? Where?”

HM The Queen: “Let me finish. An old lady asked me to help her check her balance.”

HM The King: “Oh. At an ATM?”

HM The Queen: “So I pushed her over.”

HM The Queen: “I melted Jang-mi’s multi balm. I added rainbow glitter and put it back in. He finally put some on today. He can’t understand why the kids at the reading kept giggling at him.” 

HM The King: *still laughing* 

HM The Queen: “I do miss you. This is irritating.”

HM The King: “I’ll be back the day after tomorrow.” 

HM The Queen: “But you said it will take five days.” 

HM The King: “I’m the king of Corea and I’m meeting the King and the Crown Princess of Sweden-- between the three of us, we can arrange things to suit.” 

HM The Queen: “Wouldn’t that be troublesome for some people?” 

HM The King: “I don’t care. I’ll be back with you the day after tomorrow.”

HM The Queen: “Saranghae.”

HM The King: “My goodness. And what do you love about me?”

HM The Queen: “I’m really shallow.” 

HM The King: “Go ahead.” 

HM The Queen: “Well, I know you’re vain enough about your eyes so I’ll go for your dimples. I’m going to kiss them when you get back.” 

HM The King: “What else?”

HM The Queen: “Your hair. I think you style it longer than I do mine.” 

HM The King: “That is just well-placed mousse, woman. What else?”

HM The Queen: “The way you eat. You bite into food like a kid. You want fried chicken on Friday?” 

HM The King: “Sure. What else?”

HM The Queen: “You always wrap me in your coat or robe.” 

HM The King: “Put on a robe right now. You’re not cold?”

HM The Queen: “I miss you so much.” 

HM The King: “I miss you so much, too. I’ll be back as soon as I’m able. Saranghae. Go to sleep.” 

HM The Queen: “No.”

____________________________________________________________

 Hopefully it didn’t make your teeth fall out. Not all of them anyway. 

I needed fluff because it’s Friday and we have no new episode. T.T 

Also major gooey feels for me, flashback to Episode 12′s “I missed you, I missed you, I missed you.”  

[bon-nii]

my opinion on the tpn adopted siblings, we dont know how the other kids grew up together. Emma constantly calls them her siblings, so we know her view. But when isabella grew up on her farm, we dont know if they were raised to think of the others as their siblings aswell, same about lucas and yuugo.

Romantic feelings between characters is not a foreign concept in TPN, and it really annoys me when people get genuinely angry at fans who ship characters together. If shipping these characters isn’t something you feel comfortable with or want to do that’s totally fine! But there is a reason why so many people ship different characters in the series, and it’s not because they like incest ships--they genuinely don’t interpret certain character’s relationships that way. Below the cut, I’ve attempted to highlight why I think shipping these characters is largely a nonissue.

Canonically, we know that Norman loves Emma in a romantic way and there is a good amount of contextual and subtextual clues which point towards Emma feeling the same way about Norman (even if she is not aware of it yet). For me personally, I cannot view the relationship between these two as simply sibling love. Norman does not view Emma as a sister. 

You would have to write an entire meta in order to accurately cover the scope of their relationship because it is quite central to the story (or, at least, Norman’s character, as it dictates the actions he makes) but here are some other, quick examples I wanted to include.

The way they cling to each other:

Norman is also very fond of cradling Emma’s face:

Norman being the one to drag Emma back to life after Leuvis impales her. She sees Isabella and her family as well, but Norman is separate from them which seems to suggest that she, at least subconsciously, views him differently:

This panel of the trio sleeping (poor Ray getting the Mike Wazowski treatment) which mirrors the Norman Rockwell painting of the married couple with their son:

To me it is very evident that they are not “siblings”, y’know?

I think you could make a case for Ray and Emma being just sibling love, but I also think you could make just as strong of a case for it not being sibling love. This one is very much up to the reader’s interpretation as it is not explicitly stated as being either, and is heavily based on subtext.

We also know that Yuugo loved Dina romantically 

In addition to it being explicitly stated, we also see that Dina’s name is the only name underlined on Yuugo’s wall, showing that she was more significant than the others in some way. Also, when the Glory Bell gang is finally reunited in the afterlife, Dina cradles Yuugo in her arms and he grasps onto her like a lifeline.

As for the ship of Yuugo and Lucas, I don’t think there is really much canonical basis for it, but it is my favorite ship of the series regardless simply because I am a sucker for ships between two completely broken people who learn how to love again through each other and the “Team Mom, Team Dad” dynamic T.T I think there is so much potential for exploration between these two characters and endless fanon content to be created.

As for how the Glory Bell kids view each other, this might just be a translation thing, but Yuugo exclusively (or nearly, exclusively) refers to the group as his “friends”, though I do think the GB kids felt like they were a family.

Isabella likely loved Leslie romantically. 

I say likely because it isn’t explicitly clear what kind of love it is, but I’m highly banking on it being a romantic love, because 1.) She refers to Leslie separately than her home/family in these panels. 2.) the two character’s for Ray’s name ( レイ ) are made of the first characters of Leslie and Isabella’s names (Leslie: レスリ , Isabella: イザベラ)  3.) She carries Leslie with her everyday through his song and lives on for his sake

The editor of the manga ships Anna and Ray, and Shirai and Posuka say that they purposefully left Ray/Emma and Norman/Emma ambiguous and up to interpretation. (I don’t have the receipts for this unfortunately because I was stupid and didn’t think to save them but I swear I’ve seen this confirmed, if someone has screenshots pls send them to me so I can add them here c: )

The point stands though that none of these characters are blood related, some of them view the others as siblings and some of them view them not as siblings. Plus, it’s fiction and, as Shirai and Posuka have said, it’s up to interpretation. Again, ship what you want or don’t ship at all. I just wanted to explain a bit about why I don’t understand why people think it is weird for others to romantically ship these characters together (not saying that you do this, of course, you sent a very polite message thank you :> )

[5lazarus]

End-of-Year Writers' Ask! 6 and 7

thanks for the ask! :) these require a lot of those T.T 6. What’s your favourite piece of dialogue you wrote this year? “Quark,” Odo growled. Quark splashed innocently. “What?” “The splashing.” “I have a right to splash,” Quark said. “If you’re humming, I can splash. There’s no law against that.” “There should be,” Odo said. “Being a public nuisance.” 7. What’s your favourite piece of description or narration? fanfic from a game you’ve never played--basically the guy who breaks into heaven tries to rip the key to what is basically Jerusalem that got locked away in a different dimension off the player character’s hand, though the character is only just starting to piece together how fucked they are. they start an avalanche and try to rejoin everyone on the other side of the mountains. it’s a long slough that they make the player drive their character through, which is very effective storybuilding on the first playthrough, a bit much on your second and third.

Everything hurt but she was hot, hot, hot on cold stone, her mother had died burning herself in her rage and half an army too, protecting the People, that is what a Dalish mage does, da’len, if you must lose yourself be grand about it, and make sure someone will sing of your name, oh mamae, your little favorite is dead, Halla’den didn’t do anything grand but I was killed by a would-be god, maybe human, Tevinter definitely, legend killed me and legend can resurrect me too, my children will not be ashamed of me, now all will know Clan Lavellan can only be killed by the gods, not mortal might. She opened her eyes and saw light trickling down a stone shaft. Not dead yet: fuck. Selfish, selfish: get the fuck up.

She touched her feet: still there, no toes broken, and her ankles and knees survived the fall too. Her ribs hurt, every breath choked, but she could move her fingers, her arms, and her eyes still saw through the dark. Falon’din had not come to claim her yet. Imladris used her staff to level herself up, and began to drag herself through. She did not let herself look back. When Antoine of Jader came to marry the Duchess of Wycombe, he brought an Orlesian guard and their prejudices. The Dalish towns that flourished within the Wycome Delta--Imladris, the Golden Wood, Ithilien--revolted them. Wycombe and its rivers belonged to the Duke, they said, and all must pay their tithe to the Chantry. It did not matter that these settlements predated the Blight, that the Dalish moved seamlessly from the city-elves and smaller towns for centuries. It did not matter that the Free Marcher inhabitants of the city-state were not fond of even more taxes levied, paid to the Orlesian Chantry and to the Duke and even to the Empress of Orlais. Wycombe remembered it had been Dalish wardens who saved the city from the Blight. Its new duke did not care. And when she was a child, he struck: to clear the Dalish out. Mamae, mamae you and Keeper burned the city to keep the shem from taking it and I would not have done that to Haven, I didn’t particularly care for an empty hut, a bathtub with no one to share it with, the only other elves wary servants, flinching every time Cassandra glanced at them, I didn’t want to die for some Chantry religion, not where Shartan was buried, not like this. They docked his ears but at least they gave him the Dales. What will they do to me, if I die? Mamae, mamae, you burned . Let me carry that anger, that heat, my magic like your magic keeping me warm. Into the snowblind whiteness Imladris stumbled out of the cave, and distantly a wolf howled. “Fen’Harel ma ghilana,” she choked. She fell to her knees, cold seeping into the blood-soaked lambswool of her leggings, why had she not let Harrit talk her into proper chainmail? Or leather? “Fenhedis lasa.” She did not want to die, ripped apart by wolves, bones cast about by the storm. Something would come back if she died like that. She clenched her hands into fists and, huffing, heaved herself back up. Breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe like the molten core under the sea. She coughed sparks into her hands and walked. Keep moving, Lavellan. You have survived worse than this. Dead in a ditch off the Ithilien River, if that farmer hadn’t found you. Starved out in the Barghello in Wycombe proper, if Sister Lucie hadn’t intervened. Dead in her own namesake, Imladris, a burnt out shell, when the guards came. Dead, dead, dead, dead and publicly executed  if Briala hadn’t gotten you and Mahanon out of Val Royeaux when you robbed the University: stupid fucking idea but how dare they. How dare. Outrage was good, outrage helped bank the fire, Halla’den had fallen to a Despair demon, but Imladris was stronger than that, older, more experienced, better trained. Nothing but the cold would nip at her mind. “Keep fucking walking,” she told herself. Breathing was difficult, like a lodestone in her chest. No pendant, nothing for them to loot, the boy had it, Cole, Varric wouldn’t let him steal it, she gave it in full of everyone, someone, who knows, it would get to her daughters and they would know they could wear her legacy, something of both of them, gone but the stone remained, in the Frostbacks only the dwarves and the Avvar eked an unlikely living, the closest Dalish clan was Boranehn, and she had met the arl that commanded them, hadn’t she? Vivienne said she had done bad. Well she was punished, if only it would be only her punished, if she died with this fucking Anchor dragging her down would that mean that creature could not take it? If she died they would all die too. She passed a hastily-built campfire, still smoldering, and stopped a second to flare the embers. Her Keeper had taught her a trick, to siphon off the heat from another’s fire, to conserve one’s own energy. She had taught it to Mathalin, but Mirwen was too young when she left. Deshanna would take over the training, she must have already begun, and Imladris shuddered as the wind kicked snow into her face, if she stopped she would freeze to death, be eaten by wolves, taken by despair. So cold it felt like her feet were burning as they were losing sensation, she lugged herself through the snow, kicked into her face like glass after the explosion, when a different Carta clan had blown up her printing press, was it the wind or the wolves or some hungry ghosts howling. Regardless the Frostbacks soared higher than her eyes could track, granite mountains older than her gods and she asked Dirthamen, you guard the knowledge lost to your children, but if you have mercy, any mercy at all, if you want this knowledge to carry on, reveal one of those lost caches the ancestors left. These mountains were old when Elgar’nan was still new, blinking into the blinding sun: show me where we carved the mountain path. Everywhere I walk I go in the steps of those who lived before. Ensure that there will be those after me. Spring down the mountain but no spring here: Imladris could not feel her feet anymore, and when she fell she wailed as she clambered on her hands and her knees, she did not want to die like this, the Dalish did not bend the knee. Thought faded as consciousness became only the snow on the mountain, the unthinking rock, the ice that cut, inch by inch, piece by piece, nothing special. Dirthamen ghilana ma : an old cry, never answered. The god of secrets kept his counsel close. A pile of snow, raised higher than the others: she tripped over it, a pot, Ferelden-style, the smell of stew still frozen to it. Imladris gasped, cutting through the pain, and wrenched herself back: there was still a chance. She coughed, sparks flying, and sent that pulse of mana back down to her feet. The pain was not a mistake: it was a reminder she was still alive. She screamed anyway. In Duke Antoine’s prison, there had been a Tal-Vashoth that had murmured to herself the Soul Canto during the worst of it, when they were left alone listening to what was being done on the other side of the world. She would say, “If you love purpose, fall into the tide. Let it carry you. Do not fear the dark. The sun and the stars will return to guide you. The sea and the sky themselves: Nothing special. Only pieces.” “Nothing special,” Imladris repeated to herself, lumbering on. “Only pieces. Nothing special. Only pieces.” Elves saw better than shem and qunari in the dark. Hallucinatory the sun creeped into the mountains, shifting steel to gold, her blood moving, Elgar’nan’s father returned by Mythal’s mercy, no secret, only pieces. Fire in the body, blood in the limbs, dawn coming she reached the top of a slope and exhausted, gazed down at a herd of druffalo snuffling amongst tents: Avvar? A bear came running and Imladris fell to her knees. Dirthamen had answered: nothing special, just pieces. “Lavellan! Lavellan! Maker, she’s alive. Cassandra, get a medic!” Not Dirthamen. Fucking Inquisition. With that realization, she let the sun take her, and melted into its warmth.

[i-write-shakespeare-not-disney]

Director’s Commentary- Fragile Hearts, Pidge asks for the truth and first kisses

Ahhhh I miss this story so much and I love getting to talk about it!!!

When she swallowed again, her tongue was dry. “Hunk?”

He hummed and looked at her. “You alright?” Oh Hunk you oblivious gorgeous man you.

She nodded and thumbed through her book. “Um. It’s just- I read something in here and I wanted to ask you about it,” she managed to spit out.

He chuckled and tilted his head. “We lived through all that. What could you possibly have to ask about?”

“Well, it’s not something I would’ve been aware of,” she said. She opened the book and stared at the words, afraid to look up and lose her nerve. “It says you- or I guess, your character- um….” reading this right now make me want to reread the whole thing ahhhh

“What?” Hunk prodded, confused.

Pidge took a deep breath and laughed nervously.

Just spit it out. Spit it out. Spit. It. Ou- I like doing this thing where the narration may be in third person limited, but it can still have the character’s voice bleed through. In this case the spit it out is very much pidge thinking then cutting herself off because I wanted it to feel abrupt to the reader too.

“It says you had feelings for me at that time.”

She grimaced at her hands, feeling like she was drowning in the silence that ensued. To me, the panic of asking and the grimace stems a lot from the feeling of disbelief that he would like her. She tried to remember to breathe and managed to look up and see Hunk, frozen and shocked where he sat.

“Um…. I’m not sure if it’s just something Lance threw in for romantic purposes, or if it’s real, but…. I guess I kind of wanted to know from you. She was giving him an out to deny it, mostly because she also didn’t want to sound hopeful. If you… uh, liked me like that and when… yeah,” she finished lamely. She chewed on her lower lip and waited.

“Fucking Lance,” he muttered under his breath. HE VIOLATED THE BRO CODE. Hunk had no idea his crush would get into the books, and he’s really not surprised that Lance would have spent time on it because it’s LANCE and he’s just exasperated. “Can I… see?” She handed the book over and sat back, sitting on her hands. Hunk narrowed his eyes and then closed the book, chuckling into his hand. “Um… yeah. Yeah, that… that’s real. It wasn’t just added in.” Cat’s outta the bag and also he doesn’t lie to Pidge.

Pidge felt her face heat up, as she squeaked out a high pitched, “Oh.”

She waited, expecting something more. Something like, but that was back then, or yeah I liked you then but we were kids. Just something more. But the topic was left there, hanging in the air, feeling unfinished. Because it is unfinished!! It’s still there!!!! It’s still going!! But this also just shows how Pidge is always kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Finally she asked, “Why?” He frowned and looked back at her questioningly. They were both perched on the edge of their beds anxious and drawn to each other and the space between them seemed to swallow what they said and didn’t say despite the silence in the room. She swallowed and let out a shaky breath. “I mean, why did you like me? I was… I was- I don’t know.” I never wanted to demean Pidge or have her demean herself. Pidge knew her strengths, she was smart, she was quick, she was stubborn, she was a good fighter. But as any teen might, she has her insecurities. Her mind wasn’t on dating back then, it wasn’t a priority. But looking back, she does wonder what the hell because those insecurities about her body and dating very much exist now that the danger is gone. 

“Smart? Determined? Strong?” Hunk finished for her. She looked at him, fighting the urge to roll her eyes. He looked frustrated, and he kept running a hand through his hair. “Pidge, you’ve got to stop putting yourself down. I don’t know why you do it, but it’s….” He sighed and stood up to kneel in front of her. Body language to show he’s at her beck and call (in a good way), and willing to be open and honest with her. Neither of them are closing themselves off. Her eyes were wide, focused on him, and she knew her cheeks were a bright red. “You’re a hero, Pidge. If people knew the things we did, you’d be every little girl’s role model. Smart, quick-witted, and resilient.”

She tried to steady her breathing, but he was too close and making her nervous. She could feel the anxiety running over her like a heat wave, making her feel like a fly under a magnifying glass in the sun. “You never said anything,” she whispered.

“The last thing I needed was to push away my best friend.”

She crossed her arms and scowled. “I’m not that terrible of a person, Hunk!” she snapped. “You’re my best friend too, I wouldn’t have just… cut you off or something. You could have told me, why would you just assume that I’d want you to go away?” Hunk also very much had his own insecurities. And I think that when it comes to best friends, there’s always that fear of what if it messes everything up? 

He sat back on his heels and sighed. “I was a kid, Pidge! I was…. My crushes before had never gone over well. I didn’t want to risk that happening with you. You had more important things to focus on, we all did.”

She frowned and looked away, towards the floor. “So I find out five years later in a book,” she grumbled.

“Yeah, I’m gonna kill Lance for that.” A tiny bit of more natural banter to sort of ease the new territory they’re in.

She kept glaring at the floor and took a very deep breath before her next question. “So when did you stop? Liking me, I mean. Because of Shay? Or when we came back home?”

No answer. She looked back at him to find his eyes on her. He looked like he was in pain. “Please don’t make me answer that,” he said, the words barely even a whisper. I HAD PLANNED THIS. FOR A WHILE. I was so so so excited for this very line of a pained “don’t ask me to answer that” because just. Ask me no questions, I’ll tell you no lies. Hunk has felt this for so long but he RESPECTS Pidge enough not to let it intercede with their friendship, not to expect anything out of her, and he RESPECTS her enough to never want to lie to her. Even when it can hurt him. 

She looked at him, confused and worried. “Why?” as smart as Pidge is, emotions are not her thing even now. It’s also part of why she banked on schoolwork to distract her instead of dealing with herself. 

His lips twitched into a soft, sad smile, his eyes darting away from her. “Because I don’t want to lie to you. But I also don’t want to lose you because I just got you back.”

Her heartbeat sped up and she could feel her hands shaking, longing to reach for him. “I just told you that you wouldn’t have before. Why would you lose me now?” Hunk furrowed his eyebrows, his shoulders tense, looking everywhere but at her. She reached out, turning his head to her. His eyes locked on hers immediately, but they were wide and afraid. “Hunk? Talk to me.” gentle intimacy.... T.T I love them so much and I just wanna give them every soft moment ever.

He opened his mouth but promptly clamped it shut and shook his head.

Pidge could feel her heart pounding in her entire body. She knew the desperation was plain on her face in the way her eyebrows scrunched together, the way she kept biting her lip, the way her eyes searched frantically for something telling in Hunk’s face.

“Please?” she breathed. All she had to say was please for him to break and idk that’s. I love that. 

His eyes opened and he looked her in the eyes. His shoulders slumped and he leaned into her hand. “Because now these feelings are a lot stronger than they were when I was seventeen.” Pidge gasped and jerked back slightly, staring at him in disbelief. She’d gathered he still liked her but she didn’t expect him to say the feelings were STRONGER, Hunk are you trying to kill her?? “I didn’t stop. I thought I could live without you when we came back to Earth, but…. Everything came crashing back the second I saw you looking at me in the bakery. I. Loved. Writing. This. Confession. I believe hidge-resource did art for it, I can’t recall. Freckled face, tousled hair, and… big, amber eyes,” he said with a smile, pulling back himself as if to give her space. “I’m so sorry, Pidge.” anyone else as upset as me that Hunk feels he has to APOLOGIZE for his feelings? Because. God. He just bared himself and he still expects her to be upset. Because he kept it secret, for putting her in an uncomfortable position and THIS is why I love unknown requited pining. 

She remained silent, shell-shocked. He still liked her. His feelings had grown. And he was… sorry for it?

He looked up, defeat coating his features. Like he was certain he’d made a big mistake.

Her entire body felt like it was shaking as she reached up to cup his face with her hands. His beard was rough beneath her palm but she didn’t mind. She’d been holding back from him for so long. She never had to. He still liked her. He still liked her. He still liked her. I drew this, but I’d love to redraw it. Also the repetition is her trying to get it in her head.

Pidge leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, eyes shut. She felt like she’d opened a dam, and there was nothing she could do to stop the flood of emotion and memories that flowed from her. Endless smiles and jokes, fighting side by side, sleeping next to him, dancing in a dark living room, hungover mornings, laughter and comfort and…. Hunk. someone mentioned in a comment that they really liked how this kiss was described. It’s not the physical aspect of the kiss, but the emotional and personal aspects. The things that culminated to this one moment. 

She pulled away and gasped as his hand caressed her face. “What was- why are you crying?” he stammered.

She rolled her eyes and leaned forward to kiss him again, smiling against his lips. “You should have told me. Instead of having me pine after you like one of those cheesy movies we watched today.”

“Pine?” he repeated, dumbly.

She looked him in the eyes and laughed softly. “Do you think you could stop thinking for a sec and just kiss me back?” Pidge kissed him TWICE. And he couldn’t react because he was so dumbfounded. They’re both so smart but SO FUCKING STUPID. 

He let out a breathy, nervous laugh, but he pulled her in and kissed her. It was a little clumsy and uncertain, neither of them really used to the other this way. But between laughter and relieved, adoring gazes, they managed to figure each other out, their kisses slipping into something familiar and comfortable. I always loved the idea of being comfortable enough with someone that the clumsy awkward parts are easy to get through before reaching something soft and comfortable and familiar to the two people involved. Like... they’re best friends and know everything else, and this is something new, but also something that, like everything else, they’re gonna get familiar with. 

[hokusu]

thank you for answering!! i wanted to ask you something else, speaking of erwin and levi, i'm always scared to ask but you seem chill about it! i think towards the end of s3 i kind of had this feeling erwin mostly cared about his father's ''issue'' and not much about humanity, which made me believe he didn't care as much his soldiers lives as levi or hange would do.. focusing with his goal to ''revenge'' his father, what was your impression there? erwin has been so difficult for me to read t.t

You’re welcome! Okay going to try to put my thoughts to words and I’m not great lol, but:

I think it’s not so much as Erwin doesn’t care much about humanity so much as his dream has always been finding out the answers to his father’s theory and that was the motivation to why he made it so far. Like it’s a torn feeling for him because he knows and acknowledges that he’s been fooling and inspiring all his comrades to “dedicate their hearts to humanity, when for him it’s always been purely personal beyond just that.

So I don’t deny that it may have been selfish for him to have been fighting under the guise of the real reason and it’s easy to think maybe he didn’t care as much about the lives of his men? But I get the impression that the soldiers’ lives still affects him gravely and seeing all those that have been scarified in the path of him making it so far is something that he holds like a heavy weight and it’s never been easy to do, e.g. the imagery of him standing on a mountain of corpse that he attributes to having built. I like to think he does care about the lives of the soldiers, but having been the commander giving orders and taking the risks that lead to the sacrifices of so many is something he did without hesitation because he also had to for humanity and in turn, his dream.

While his main reason may have ultimately been purely personal, it’s undeniable how much he’s contributed for humanity. In the end Erwin gives up his dream and again, makes the sacrifices for the slim possibility of winning (banking on Levi’s strengths) for humanity, knowing that the only way to have that winning chance is if he is the one leading everyone to their deaths (as opposed to them doing nothing and very likely dying without contribution).

So would I say that maybe Levi and Hange cares more about the lives of the soldiers than Erwin? Possibly, maybe. But I think for all of them, the lost of their comrades has never been taken lightly.