#i just think everyone should see it its very pretty
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Her name is Alana De Riva. She was a slave in Tevinter, but got freed and joined the Antiva Crows after she helped Viago(pre-talon) get in her former master's mansion to assassinate him.
She is chaotic good. Sometimes too chaotic, sometimes too good
Elf and mage
Possibly in Antiva, maybe captured by the Antaam after she freed their prisioners
It's a mix between the postive one and the joking one
Bellara, Neve, Harding and Taash
Lucanis
None one really, poor thing has zero sense of self preservation
She loves the crows, they are the only family she has known and its very grateful for the part they played on her fleeing slavery but Viago fears she is too soft for the job sometimes and that might be her downfall
No, but she has sweet singing voice, nothing professional or anything but she used to sing to the others slaves to soothe them and does the same for the crows fledglings after they had particulary tough training day
Dagger and orb - she is not picky about which one
She is very curious and experimental, don't think she has come to a conclusion on that matter
It's her job. She will enjoy it though if she thinks someone desarves it.
She hadn't have much time for hobbies since she pretty much went from being slave, to crow training to save the world from elven gods but since she moved to Antiva she is been training to learn how to draw and paint. She wants to paint the landscapes at night.
Viago is big brother to her (or maybe like a grumpy dad?) and she looks up to Teia. She is also as close as one can get to the current Heir from the crows bc they were recruited at the same time and trained together. She got super starstruck when she met Dorian because she remembered her master's hatred of him, she admired him for speaking up against slavery in Tevinter ever since. She hates the first warden guts. And she can't forgive Illario after what he put Lucanis through, even if he does.
After meeting Assan, Griffons, for sure. I have a headcanon that she often visits his brothers and sisters in Arlathan forest and even bonded with one of them
Yes, she is very thankful for get the chance to see all the world because it's something she never thought she'd be able to do as a slave.
Probably working with the crows, trying to think of way to end the Antaam occupation.
Probably because she was too good for her own good. Doing some not so well thought out selfless, self sacrificing act. Viago will be pissed.
She would fight him, but like, try to talk things over first for the Inquisitor's sake.
She is specially proud of her eletric magic because it is effective and she manages to wield it with some flair (as a crow should)
Tevinter and Antivan. She knows some elven and curse words in Qunari that Taash taught her
She would try to be optimistic and push through the crises so when it's finally over I think she has no energy to do anything. After the events of the endgame she might need a few days in bed, cuddling with Lucanis before she can function again
She is not very spiritual or religious, so no. She caught some mannerism and habits from the Andrastian faith but isn't a firm believer herself.
Spell blade, she incorporates her crow training to her magic fighting style.
A tiny and energetic dog, will bite you and cuddle with you with the same passion
She had just turned into a full fledged crow, so there was a lot of being (happily) bossed around by Viago
She considers heself the leader but listen to everyone and specially asks Harding for advise since she had been working with Verric the longest and also has the experience in the Inquisition
The shadow dragons, she'd love to help free other slaves. She'd have a great time with the Lords of Fortune too.
She is kind, didn't let the cruelty and horrors she experience turn her bitter. She is full of life and face the worlds with an open chest and open heart
Rook Questionnaire
inspired by @cassieuncaged's BG3 Character Development Questions but for Rook instead!
1: Where in the Thedas is your Rook from?
2: What is your character's alignment?
3: Race and subclass?
4: If your Rook was a companion, where would they be found?
5: What emotion did they usually pick?
6: What companion are you platonically close with?
7: Romantically close with?
8: Who are they suspicious of?
9: Does your Rook get along with their chosen Faction?
10: Are they proficient in playing any instruments?
11: Weapon of choice?
12: What is their orientation?
13: What are their thoughts on killing? Is it a necessary evil or do they enjoy it?
14: What hobbies does your Rook have?
15: What NPCs do they like? Which one's do they dislike?
16: Do they have a favorite creature in the Thedas?
17: Do they enjoy life as an adventurer?
18: What would your Rook be doing if they weren't recruited by Varric?
19: How do you think they'll meet their end?
20: Would they side with Solas or fight him?
21: What is your Rook's favorite ability?
22: What languages is your character fluent in?
23: What do they do after an absolute crisis?
24: Does your character believe in the afterlife?
25: What specialization best represents your Rook?
26: What animal best represents your Rook?
27: What was their life like before the events of Veilguard?
28: Is your character the de facto leader of the party? Or do they consider someone else to be the leader?
29: If you could choose a different faction for your Rook, which one would they have joined and why?
30: What's your favorite thing about your Rook?
#dragon age#or ask me!#veilguard#rook#lucanis x rook#rookanis#dragon age the veilgaurd spoilers#crow!rook#antivan crows#viago de riva#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age lucanis#lucanis romance
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id love to request a blurb with eddie and reader who has some family trauma. like parental issues 🥲 and just eddie being a sweetheart
prompt: “what’s wrong with me? why didn’t they love me? why wasn’t i good enough for them?”
ty for requesting!! — eddie comforts you after a fight with your dad (established relationship, hurt/comfort cw for mentions of childhood trauma | 1.5k)
“I think I’m broken.”
From where you’re laid on Eddie’s chest, you can feel the rumbling of his laughter against your cheek. The bubbly sound of his boyish chuckling almost makes you smile. Almost.
“I don’t know…” he lilts, smoothing his hand over your back, as though to check for any cracks or scrapes. “You seem pretty perfect to me.”
“Shut up,” you murmur and tuck your burning face into his chest — a desperate and feeble attempt to hide. Your nose smushes against his neck, and you take a deep breath in. The familiar scent of weed and woody cologne fills your lungs.
“You don’t feel broken either—” Eddie teases, just before jabbing your side with two fingers.
The fleeting tickling sensation makes you squeal as your hand jerks out to swat at him. The flailing limb finds purchase on his stomach, which trembles now with laughter.
Your body, moving on its own accord in reaction to his prodding, rises from the pillow you’d made upon his body. You move to the very edge of his mattress, knees pulled up to your chest, and sit with your back facing the lazing boy.
You wince and rub at your side, though it hadn’t hurt at all.
“I’m being serious, Eds,” you whine in protest, sparing the boy a glance over your shoulder.
“Oh, right. Serious,” he responds, still joking as he clears his throat and lowers his voice a few octaves. “Very serious.”
You manage a small smile before turning away again. You focus your gaze on your lap and fidget with a loose thread hanging from the hem of your sock. It’s easier than looking back at him — at the boy who’s made a superpower out of making you laugh. Even though he’s in bed with you now, you don’t feel nearly as happy as you know you should be.
It’s not fair. Not to either of you.
“I’m just… I’m just thinking about the fight. You know. With my dad,” you confess, voice featherlight and faraway. The sock tightens around your ankle when you pull the string taut. You wrap it around the tip of your finger until it turns a shade darker. “I’m starting to feel like maybe it’s my fault…”
Eddie grows suddenly solemn.
“Hey… That’s… No,” he stammers and rises on his elbows, trying to find the right words to comfort you. “I mean, no offense, babe, but your dad’s an asshole. You can’t blame yourself for that.”
“No, I know, it’s just… He’s a good guy to everyone but me, you know? Like, the whole town loves him— and he loves ‘em back, but just not… Just not me,” you say, laughing softly to yourself, still refusing to meeting Eddie’s chocolate gaze that swims now with concern. The tip of your finger starts to tingle with numbness. “And I’m just like… what’s wrong with me, you know? Why doesn’t he love me? What did I do that was so wrong?”
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Eddie answers for you, gentle but still stern in his way. He reaches out for you and curls his ringed fingers around the crook of your elbow — if nothing but to feel you and to keep you tethered.
You turn to look at him then, a feeble glance from the corner of your eye. His hair is wild with sex and sleep. His cheeks are flushed and rosy. His mouth is pink and softly swollen. He’s glowing and pretty and perfect. You want to keep him forever this way, like a picture in a locket or a love letter in your wallet.
“He puts up a front with the rest of the town, so no one can see what a jerk he really is, right?” Eddie tells you. “But you know the real him. And he hates that you know the real him, so he takes it out on you.”
It’s a lot more profound than anything you could’ve expected to spill from his mouth. And it hurts even more because you know he’s right.
You were raised with your father’s urge to people-please. It didn’t matter how crazy your life got, just as long as no one else had to see it. None of the bullshit mattered if people didn’t know it was there. That was your father’s philosophy, at least.
You become half daughter, half apology — blundering with the uncertainty of yourself and the wrong kind of love.
Eddie was the first person you ever let in.
You showed him all your chaos, and he loved you just the same. The catastrophe of your personality was suddenly beautiful again — interesting and lovely and warm. You were perfect because you weren’t.
It’s why you run away to Eddie’s trailer so often, and why you’re here even now. Because he lets you be human — clumsy and naive and starry-eyed — and doesn’t snatch any of it away from you. He just holds you.
His warm hand squeezes your arm in reassurance. His eyes glint with sincerity. “He’s not your dad, okay? He’s just… some guy with a kid. And why should some guy get to make the best girl in the world feel so sad?”
A smile quirks at the corner of your mouth, and trembles softly as you confess: “I’m just scared that I’m unloveable.”
The heaviness of the moment and of your admission is swept aside with the stubborn shake of Eddie’s head. He dispels the thought from his own mind with enough vigor to take it from yours, too.
He rises fully and slides towards the edge of the bed so he’s behind you. One leg curls behind your back while the other sits straight out beside your own. His warmth envelops you wholly, like warm honey or a soft blanket. The hand on your arm doesn’t move. This boy and his touch are the steadiest things you’ve ever known.
“Well, that’s just not true,” he argues, lips warm on your shoulder as he presses a kiss over your t-shirt. He rests his chin there a second later.
Your face scrunches softly in discontent. You don’t like how sure he sounds, batting off your concerns with the finesse of someone who knows more than you do.
“How would you know?”
“‘Cause I love you,” he answers like it’s obvious, chin bobbing with every word. “And so does a ton of other people. But I matter the most, so… It just can’t be true, you know? Process of elimination or whatever.”
It’s hard to see him from this angle, with his face so close to yours. You want so badly to kiss him, but you can’t look away from his chocolate button eyes and the sparkle they look at you with.
You don’t want to smile, but you can’t help it — like some kind of pouting child. The expression tugs slowly at your mouth before bursting into glittering rays of sunshine. It’s like blue skies after pouring rain, how swiftly you recover.
“There she is,” Eddie singsongs with a beaming grin of his own. He presses a kiss to your cheek, so full of intent that it smacks when he parts from you. You laugh when the edges of his curls tickle your jaw.
“You okay now?” he asks — just measuring the temperature, not boxing you into a corner.
It’s not the ‘you have to be okay’ that you’re used to.
Instead, it’s a — ‘it’s okay if you’re not okay, I’ll just kiss you a million times until you forget why you were sad.’
You nod. “Yeah, I’m okay… Thanks, Eds”
Eddie watches you go suddenly sheepish, peering at him from beneath your lashes like you’re embarrassed to have been human in front of him.
“Don’t thank me,” he scoffs. “I just love you— You shouldn’t thank me for that.”
“Right,” you answer with a soft laugh. ‘Cause you’re still getting used to that — being loved without having to give anything in return other than your own affection. Sometimes, your heart is enough.
You settle finally in his arms, full of warmth and contentment. You wrap your arms around the ones he holds you with. Eddie lets you fall heavy on his chest — warm honey, soft blanket.
“I love you, too, by the way,” you hum after a moment of velvet silence.
Eddie presses his lips to the crown of your head and smiles. “I know.”
“Kinda makes me feel like a little carton of strawberries.”
He laughs into your hair. “What does that even mean?”
“I don’t know,” you lilt, giggling right along with him. “That’s just what it feels like… I love you so much, it’s like… Like I’m holding the sun on both sides or something.”
“Whoa. That’s a lot,” he muses, only partially playful. “Still not as much as I love you, though.”
And, for now, you don’t argue.
There isn’t a reason to, really.
You love each other, and that’s enough.
Nothing can beat the feeling of finally being understood, of being held in the right hands. Nor is anything as liberating as the pursuit of wholeness instead of perfection.
And in Eddie’s arms, you’re whole.
#published by bug#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x you#stranger things x reader#eddie munson imagine#stranger things#stranger things imagine#stranger things fic#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things#eddie munson fanfiction#eddie munson fics#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fic#st drabbles#eddie spaghetti drabble
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Hello,how are you,hope everything is going well in your life ☺️
May I ask please for SVT reaction if their SO is serious and always wears poker face person but she has soft spot only for him🙏🏻
And may I add God bless all tumblr writers, thanks to you guys I’m learning English language 🫶🏻
their cold s/o having a soft spot for them
content: established relationship implied, fluff, etc.
wc: 633
a/n: i hope things are going well for you too! sorry this took so long. i hope you like it!!
masterlist
seungcheol -
good. it's exactly as it should be. he's a little possessive, so this just works perfectly for him! everyone who knows you knows about your soft spot for him and he thrives in it.
jeonghan -
jokes and teases you about being obsessed with him as soon as he notices how differently you act around him in comparison to everyone else. would constantly use this as leverage to get you to do or say things. can't really blame you, though. so many people have a soft spot for him.
joshua -
he thinks its the cutest thing. sometimes he cant help but laugh when he sees you light up at his presence. your soft spot for him is such a serotonin boost for him. like damn you must really like him!
jun -
he gets a little flustered when he realizes you have a soft spot specifically for him and no one else. is he that fun to be around? is he that much of a light in your life? won't ever actually question it, but rather just grow to enjoy it.
soonyoung -
he probably doesnt even realize you tend to have a poker face or be perceived as cold for other people. he mostly pays attention to how you treat him and is too distracted by your existence to realize he's the only person you ever smile around.
wonwoo -
he thinks its adorable. loves how you could look like you're having the worst time of your life up until you spot him, lighting up immediately. he knows you're not actually miserable unless he's there, but he still finds it cute that there's such a contrast in your attitude between when he's with you and when he's not.
jihoon -
you guys are twins!! he gets told a lot that he seems cold, that some people are put off by his closed-off exterior sometimes. when he met you, he'd completely understand how most people felt around him. except he'd soon realize that you'd made an exception for him, being the sweetest person alive to him in specific. he'd just have to return the favor.
seokmin -
he kind of loves it. it just means he gets to try and make you crack a smile or a laugh while in public. he knows you have a soft spot for him, but he'd want to show it off to everyone else, show them that you're whipped for him as he is for you.
mingyu -
he also tries to get you to smile more often in public. he makes it his own personal mission to make sure how pretty your smile is since most of the time you have a poker face. but at the same time, he also enjoys keeping you to himself sometimes.
minghao -
he's known to appear more serious than he actually is, so he relates. you'd have a very specific dynamic where you both have a soft spot for the other while keeping a safe distance from most other people. he'd really enjoy this.
seungkwan -
you'd kind of remind him of vernon lol. he'd find it cute, same as he does with vernon. he's such a bright person, always smiling and making others smile, making him the exact opposite of you. you'd balance each other out pretty well.
vernon -
you're both misinterpreted for being cold sometimes, even though its just a case of having a poker face. it'd be a funny sight to see for everyone else, how you'd both instantly light up any time you were together.
chan -
it makes him feel special. it's like there's a whole side of you only he gets to have and it's a huge privilege he doesn't take for granted. sometimes he'll even go out of his way to ensure you're extra smiley and happy when you're with him.
#seventeen x reader#seventeen fanfic#svt fanfic#svt x reader#seventeen imagine#seventeen oneshot#svt oneshot#svt reactions#seventeen reactions#svt fluff#seventeen fluff
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monaco travel poster, roger broders, 1922
courtesy of the internet archive
#art#monaco#monte carlo#roger broders#travel poster#i just think everyone should see it its very pretty#1920s
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Well.
#(I'm back)#It was. Uhm. A chapter#First of all: I'm ENDLESSLY GRATEFUL to the person who sent me the translation basically as soon as the chapter came out.#I even did like 90% of typesetting but didn't finish it because I had to go out#(aka with my friends were literally knocking out at my room and I couldn't make it any more late lol)#Mixed feelings about it? Mostly because there's so much exposition... I'll need to reread it another three times before it sinks in#The color page is AMAZING 10000000000000/10 I love my sskks so much they're so cute I love them so much they're so cute.#Easily the best part of the chapter.#The color page was? Very very pretty too? Like a lot more than usual if you ask me! I can't wait for the volume cover 🥺🥺#It should come out soon shouldn't it? Usually color spreads / pages open the volume...#Akutagawa fake dying again is funny. Like it isssss but also. Idk it's a little lame how we're changing the pov from ss/kk again :/#I can't even tell if I'm being biased or if it's an actual storytelling critique. I don't care right now I just want to see Akutagawa–#being cool rather than. You know. Dead on the ground.#That said! It's also very funny and touches my sense of humor precisely.#Like yeah Akutagawa being like the second strongest pm member and overall one of the most powerful ability user in the world–#that everyone fears (and I know he is! He is indeed for real!)#And yet he always ends up face to the ground 😂😂😂 Like if we don't count the ss/kk fights he literally only ever won against Hawthorne.#And even then he failed to kill him and Mitchell. It's so funny to me. I love him. He's so pathetic#“Wow! Akutagawa is so cool and invincible now!” *ends up biting the dust not even two chapters later*#It's okay because I love him. He's very very powerful and he's also very very pathetic I love that for him#That said :/ I don't really care about Fukuzawa :/ Idk :/ Like :/#Don't get me wrong I LOVE Fukuzawa (I don't. I'm mostly neutral towards him) but this is the ss/kk moment man :/ Whatchu doin#That's about it. Let's see what the next chapter brings!#Everything accounted for I'm glad there wasn't like. A ss/kk kiss or any other big big ss/kk moment#(although Atsushi admiring Akutagawa and thinking about his eyes has its fair share of neatness to it!!)#Because with everything going on this evening I really would have been let down to miss it#But I keep hope for the next chapters!! Please...#random rambles#Had tons of fun typesetting! Even though I don't think there's a point in posting it now. But would love to do it again in the future!#bsd spoilers
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Well, on the upside, Veilguard’s absolutely horrid writing and utter lack of meaningful roleplay mechanics made me appreciate Inquisition’s already watered-down writing and roleplay mechanics.
#Emmrich’s pretty much the only decent companion but my god.#This game feels like a daycare simulator.#No option but to be nice to and validate everyone even when they’re being objectively awful themselves (looking at Taash in particular)#The stakes should feel high but instead I just feel like I’m babysitting toddlers#And normally I’m a completionist who loves doing all the quests but the game actively forces you into it#You HAVE to recruit all the companions; you HAVE to baby and validate them all; you HAVE to complete all their quests#No option to even mention the supposed Dire Stakes of the universe.#The game treats you like you’re seven and over-explains everything to you. The maps are terrible even if they look good.#The voice acting for a few companions is… questionable.#For a game we waited ten years for it feels like someone’s rough/unfinished first draft.#And again no truly meaningful roleplay choices or actions.#The game just forces you to be nice to everyone. Rook feels like an inveterate spectator and an invertebrate to boot. Utterly spineless.#Every time we see a returning companion I feel like Hadvar: ‘Who… are you?’#Because they act nothing like their previously established personalities & it’s like Veilguard goes out of its way to ignore previous games#The head writer’s self-insert is painfully obvious and atrociously-written in particular#You can only be a Good Nice Guy#Maybe sometimes a Stern Nice Guy and very occasionally a Nice Guy Who Thinks He’s Funny But Isn’t#Just! My god.#I want to return the game. For the first time ever in my life.#So disappointed.#text#chey.txt
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Endeavor is almost a perfect allegory for what the society in the mha universe does to people who can't be heroes or use their quirks in a way to benefit society, which is cast them aside or pass them over without over giving them a second glance until uh-oh! Suddenly they're worth being noticed because they're a threat.
He apologizes to his family, which is good! If you're a bad person and did terrible things, the first step in your own transformation and atonement should be to acknowledge what you've done and to apologize to those you've wronged. Great!
Thing is, Endeavor set off a chain reaction with his abusive, neglectful and downright irresponsible choices that it damaged everyone in his family for life.
I don't think someone who causes one of their own children to literally go up in flames, crying because they're finally getting attention from their father and family in the very end, ever deserves to be forgiven.
#mha#my hero academia#endevour#mha dabi#mha endeavor#im sure im gonna get some flack for this because for some reason lots of people think that he should be redeemed but no???#im sorry guys i like villain redemption arcs as much as the next person and i understand being confused over#why so many people forgive other villains vs endeavor#but theres something about being in a place of power and influence and using that to harm and neglect your family and having EVERYONE#EVERYONE IN THE WHOLE WORLD PRETTY MUCH JUST LOOK AWAY AND SAY OH ITS NOT MY FAMILY THATS HIS BUISNESS#BETTER NOT GET INVOLVED IT'LL SORT ITSELF OUT#that just doesnt sit right with me whatsoever#ive liked plenty of villains who do horrible things but i can still see their good side because they have their henchman or their own family#or that one person who they care for and will protect because thats their heart#im saying that even though endeavor FEELS BAD he really just didnt have a heart or care for anyone but himself until hmm#oh! after he became the number one hero#and after he got a scar that humbled him#theres a reddit post where the op talks about how people soften him and are willing to forgive him but i think thats coming from people who#very very thankfully no shade did jot have to deal with anyone like that irl in any way#OR people who are less into stories and allegories again no shade and take characters at a more surface level#its just another read on the character which of course is obviously fine but please please understand why people will never forgive him#mha spoilers#its like especially hard to not hate him when you find out that dabi had his mothers power all along#meaning he WAS that perfect child that endeavor had been looking for but he cast him aside too soon to even let that power bloom early on#god i hate Endeavor so much#love the way hes written story and character wise like he IS really well written#but fuck him all the same lol
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study break doodles! trying to find the style i want for them lol
#my time at sandrock#mtas logan#mtas haru#mtas spoilers#bc on account of. u see the faces lol#dude i liked haru before? i LOVE haru now what a guy#like ofc im here to be a logankisser but everyone on team haru? yeah you guys are right#i am mostly just imagining logan's features in particular but like. haru is pretty#i think its bc i usually draw sharper features but he is very rounded and soft and pretty and i like that. fun to draw#i think he should have beauty marks. Love the job his VA did#okay back to it!
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Get real!!!!
#what if i#boy who struggled so hard with making it simple enough for me to comfortably recreate but also i love adding pointless things ill forget so#see how long it takes for me to completely forget to draw the second smaller pin on the jacket#heavy metal core who is definitely very much a core and not a turret thats just convinced everyone that they're a core nuh uh#one day ill think of more ways to making my turret android designs more distinct from cores bc rn they kinda got the Octoling treatment#which is technically different species but the differences in base appearance are actually pretty minor like its just the suckers and eyes#but im not gonna stress myself over it but its something ill get to whenever i feel like it#unfortunately i had a stomach ache so ended up sleeping until 4pm then getting to play games with my friend gave me motivation at 11 pm#i should really just write how my day was in a separate post bc i talk a whole lot <3#heavy metal core#heavy metal core aperture tag#portal 2#aperture tag
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no, i dont think im obligated to still small talk an hour into my meet up with a friend group ive been a part of for 2 years, and i dont think im overreacting or showing a lack of loyalty when im unsatisfied with such a conversation. As someone who hates small talk, that friend group isn't for me, and i get nothing from it, and i will choose not to feel like a weirdo (derogatory) or a traitor (..because we didn't promise each other we'd be together forever afaik), for being unsatisfied and leaving. ive shown them affection (that i didnt fully feel) for as long as i could
#switching to small talk bc i dont vibe with them is something my mom suggested#i know they feel the same but even then i think it feels bad to suddenly end it.#probably bc i dont want them to see how bad id treat them if we werent friends. i dont want them to hate me even more#but also i have to come to terms with the fact i will have no friend group if things go this way#because i dont talk to ppl and better ppl wont magically materialise in my dms#or on the lone forest bench i sit on when biking or at the rpg sessions i go to. bc people there are never my type#ppl on the bench are too rich and sporty and ppl on the rpg are too sigma male#im pretty much only hoping ill meet people in college or at art classes irl. or a convention but i didnt even have time to go this year#i should start meeting ppl online but if i dont show my face (online games) it usually doesnt go anywhere#and if i do show my face (tinder) and i mess up (like you do on tinder which is a risky place)#im losing the limited queer people in my city forever. im using up a very finite resource#i could go to meet ppl on tumblr but we will never go to voice call bc its not what you do here#conclusion: what i should do is join more random fandom discords thru tumblr and wait til theyre on call#(<- option A.)#or wait til im in some classes and join a discord with people from my school but not my class#(<- option B.)#however i dont even want to talk to people#fuck people. im tired of people#theres a number of ways i could make friends but i hate everyone i meet and am constantly pissed off and dissatisfied#i may just be aplatonic#its hard to come to terms with
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my biggest dissonance is how robert de niro in once upon a time in america actually looks like young carlo (but more handsome than carlo) but noodles character is nothing like him like max is a certifed carlo core. he would do everything max did
#noodles is eddie core. such a dissonance#anyway. another reason i crave moretti dlc is that all these young guys ardnt supposed to be handsome#no more handsome young mafiosos. and they would also be morally ugly. i crave it sm#good sees im so attached to higher ranks characters in m2 is bc theyre way#more relatable. god please. i live in a godawful country everyone here turn cursed at early age#and bout character design. id give some of them monobows at least not full ok#n tanned skin. some characters look like my armenian relatives im sorry. and ik that#it & arm ppl sometimes look very alike and i mean#luca frank carlo eddie rocco - just on top of my head#my roman empire is when i did character design for don henry fic carlo supposed to have#a full mononrow#but i was a chicken shit (i still am). if i wasnt he would have it & eddie had more tanned skin#but ok hes from canada he'll be pale makes sense. but still i need more of them#to look more like southerns like. pretty please? ok lemme remake at least#carlo n roccos designs please. if i was a strong person id redraw morettis design too#but idk. i think yeah its logical for him too look more like torrio#anyway. i believe half of m2 & mde characters should be thicker im sorry theyre italian#and they also rich. theyre rich italians. why r they so thin.#have u seen al capone. ok sorry. ik that i also draw them pretty thin but its bc im a chicken shit#anyway my conclusion i need moretti dlc so bad god. so funny that itll never happen#bout chicken shit ik that lauretta shouldnt be super thin either esp after marriage#& ok if we ever we'll see henrys mother & shell be thin id start to howl sorry#she mothered for 7 times she cant be thin#if we ever will* dont mind me im stupid#atp my fav m2 designs r frank carlo n joe. n also luca#<- if to speak only bout italian characters. but m2 in general have good ch. design#i remember that one beef bout fat bald italians. didnt say anything back then bc i was too lazy#but im on the side of fat balding italians. did u forget that italians have like. strong food culture#+ alcohol w food. mostly they arent supposed to be thin like just logically sorry get real#upd. derek is a peak character design to me. hes very vivid + completely bonds w his character. hes a cool ch. in general
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Who up listening to good luck babe by chappell roan and having it resonate not in the way intended but resonating nonetheless. About to go ham in the tags about the overlap of being a lesbian and being aromantic...if u even care....
#my art#gore#organs#its 2am so not a lot of this is going to be very coherent but this song makes me feel a lot of things about it all#like. its the Expectations#the expectation that im going to date men and the expectation that im going to date at all have always felt equally stifling#theres that feeling of not trying hard enough or not realizing it at first or trying to lean into what you're told you should feel#and having it not pay off time and time again and wishing you could just make it work#because everyone else around you has it just fine and you dont get why you're struggling with it so much#THERE ARE MORE SIMILARITIES BETWEEN THE TWO IS WHAT IM SAYING#like obviously figuring out aromanticism is especially weird because its a lack of something BUT THEYRE PRETTY SIMILAR#realizing I dont want to date anyone mirrors realizing I didn't like boys but like. idk man its worse sometimes?#I wouldn't trade it for the world it means a lot to me but its almost like people go out of their way not to understand it sometimes#at the end of the day I am the you in that song#it was a very very long road to being okay with never falling in love because that was something I wanted for a very very long time#at the end of the day I will never have to be someones wife and I think its better that way#but its also hard not to get jealous sometimes#like I know its irrational I know I get physically ill at just the thought of being asked out but like#sometimes ill see my friends with their girlfriends and ill feel like clawing my own chest out with want#but also if anyone asks me out I will have to dig myself into a pit and never come out. I think.#I want to be with women but I dont want to Be With Women if that makes sense#its another layer of difficulty that I dont think I'll ever be able to get past#I feel like at this point I should just be trying to conditioning myself out of any form of desire because its just not an option for me#which definitely isn't true and like chappell roan says. you'd have to stop the world just to stop the feeling.#but its also so tiring to have to sit here with the feeling and feel bad for having the feeling.#I dont know#I think if I felt a little more or a little less I’d be fine but I’m stuck in the middle#it feels very weird talking about this openly but also its very difficult to talk about with friends because most of them dont get it#anyways something something Josies monologue from bottoms#im going to bed
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#NOOOO WHY IS WANO SO FUNNN#i was so ready to b done w this show but the whimsy is back in full swing orz#jk anyways i cant believe ive circled back into having 150 episodes left . what the hell thats not allowed#i think this might be the most well paced arc in post-ts it’s a miracle#i mean wci didnt really have that many misses but wanos pretty solid so far#now im waiting very patiently for yamato …….#the soba mask thing was funny as shit btw . they should bring back sniper king so they could matchies#waterloo being a nerd about it won me over unfortunately . he’s forgiven for his fuckass hat crimes#i see why everyone likes him now#mayb i just didnt care abt him b4 bc he didnt have bepo shachi and penguin#but like . theyr captured rn as im watching#hes never not having a shit time its so real#solar-talks
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#focus who? i dont kno her#its so bad. i csnt focus at all. and ive got way too much to do. take me back to last week where i spent hours reading papers#annoying. also possibly lack of sleep cstching up with me#do u ever get very little sleep and not miss it at all? yea bitch all the time. then i get depressed and its sleepy time#and by sleepy time i mean i get like 8hrs of sleep lol#maybe ill just do nothing and completely fuck over my sunday lol#maybe i should go run up thr mountain rn before im stuck in a car for 2 hrs#bc im getting spikes of being insane. unfortunately i have no emotional object permanence so when i feel crazy its like#ive always felt like this ans its terrible forever. and then immediately afterward im like lol wot? nah im fine. ive always been fine#shout out to mood swings ✌️ like bro im trying to get materials together so i can teach a class. can u shut the fuck up? and focus?#well see how i do today with a ton of socializing. itll b fine. im normal i can b normal#or i can b endearing quirky. or whatever i usually i am. i dont think i have conversations like a normal person but i cant tell bc im not#there for conversations im not in. whatever everyone else has conversations in a way thats boring. i just wanna grill ppl til i understand#how they work. and then feel like im gonna die if im in a group conversation 🙃 let me study thr ppl around me#bc im very normal. god. i promise irl im not that weird. ppl think im nice and cool and successful#ok maybe not cool. but i think i can get away with being interesting. i got at least a lil charisma. im only a bit horribly awkward ;-]#but i try to own it. wtf was i saying. jesus. i cant with my brain rn. i shoulf have gone for a run this morning#being social just makes me anxious so im babbling i guess. but itll b fun. and itll b pretty im sure#maybe ill try to draw my ocs while im not paying attention. ive neglected them for so long 😭#unrelated
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Doing this because it makes me happy •Ꮂ•. Im making it difficult on all of you though.
1 note- I'll go drink water
10 notes - I'll set alarms to actually care for myself
50 notes - set up a daily productivity system so I stop wasting my time doing nothing.
100 notes - ask my friends to help me buy a skirt
500 notes - get a bra & a whole bunch of other affirming clothing !!!
1k - tell my dad that my gf is also trans
2.5k - ask my dad to address me by my prefferred name & pronouns 1k went pretty poorly, so I dont feel super comfortable making an attempt on this.
5k - try to get therapy/psychologist
10k - girl mode at all times (start actively wearing makeup/clothing/doing voice training around people at all times)
50k - try for HRT (0% chance) (also no guarantee on this one)
Asfgg. It feels surprisingly good to have a bunch of strangers who want me to be happy
I have now set up alarms for eating, waking up, and hygene related stuff. I seriously doubt we get to 500, but this has made me significantly happier •Ꮂ•
Doing some math... 25 notes in 4 hours. 6.25 notes per hour. 8000 hours or 333 days until this hits 50k. Hrt in a year ig.
Um. Wow. Its been a day, and we're almost at 300. Everything 500 & below was supposed to be things I'd do with minimal intervention. But now, we're getting to the scarier stuff. I am very intimidated, but also excited
My gf really badly wanted to be here when I buy some of the clothing, so the skirt will be this week, the rest of the clothing will be when she comes back from vacation
Saying that you're force femming me is so not allowed. This is unfair. You have no right to make me feel the ways Im feelingggg. Stop making me happy.
Welp. I told him about my girlfriend. And things went about as poorly as expected. He said that Im parroting what other people think. Slowly taking little parts of them, and applying them to myself. Specifically, being trans. He didnt even leave it to maybes. He said with certainty that I was copying everyone else. I know 9 trans people total. Only 2 of them are my close friends. Everyone else, Im barely aquaintences with. I should have told him that regardless of whatever theories he has, this has boosted my confidence massively. Slightly less excited for 2.5k notes. At least everything after that is very positive. And at least this lets me talk about my girlfriend for ages. I dont have to say her deadname through gritted teeth. Oh context. He already knows Im trans but was ignoring it.
I GOT A SKIRT!!!!!
Thank all of you so much. At first when I got the skirt, I was pretty intimidated by the idea of showing my legs. I thought everyone will just see me as a man. But there's a degree of confidence you all have given me. Yeah. Im pretty. Yeah, Im beautiful even. Yeah. Its a friggin fantastic skirt. And anyone who thinks otherwise is dumb. Im happy, and thats what matters.
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NSFW
warnings: clown fucking lol
The amusement park on the mountain had once been the most popular attraction in your town. Everyone visited for whatever special occasion they could, spending tons of money on merchandise and tickets.
What made it so appealing to the public? Everyone’s answer was always…
Silly the Clown!
He was taller than any person you’d ever meet, always nicely dressed and wearing close make up. When he walked through the park, everyone would stop what they were doing to line up and watch his act.
Not only was he hilarious, he was also quite handsome, according to the men and women that traveled to see him.
He was shrouded in mystery. No one ever saw him without his makeup on around town or even leave the park. People would wait in hiding, trying to catch a glimpse of Silly’s real appearance.
But one day, the amusement park shut down. Rumors spread quickly through the small town, some saying there were loans gone wrong or even murder.
No one really knew why their beloved amusement park was no more, and Silly was never seen again.
That was… until you showed up.
You had been a huge fan of the amusement park as a kid, but never got to attend until your 18th birthday. Now, all these years later, you were back on your 25th, planning to celebrate by doing some urban exploring and maybe take home a souvenir.
The park wasn’t as run down as you had first expected. Although none of the rides seemed to be in order, they looked to be maintained. None of the grass was overgrown, the walls were free of graffiti, and the ground was clean, no litter or dead leaves.
It was as if the park was simply closed for the day, not abandoned completely.
As you wandered the grounds, you kept turning to see if someone was behind you. You felt eyes on you the entire time, making you think perhaps there were cameras or security guards still on the premises to prevent vandalism and theft.
What you didn’t know was that you were being followed and carefully monitored. Every step you took was being tracked, every little thing you did was observed by the pair of eyes watching you,
Though… for a moment the observer’s gaze moved over your body, lingering on… certain parts. It had been so long since someone had come to visit, and even longer since it had even thought about its… urges.
And you were such a pretty thing.
It was getting dark, meaning you should get back to your car soon… but as the sun went down, you nearly fell over in fright when the amusement park sparked to life.
Lights lit up, rides began to move, and you could smell popcorn and hotdogs being cooked near the food stalls.
“I’ve gotta be hallucinating…”
“You’re not.”
You froze in your tracks, the hair on the back of your end standing up straight. That voice…
“S-Silly?”
He appeared in front of you, a red painted smile spreading across his face. “Silly the clown, that’s me! You’re back!”
It took you nearly an entire minute to process that the man in front of you was really Silly the clown, someone that hadn’t been seen in years!
“W… what do you mean?”
His fingertips traced down your side, stopping at your hip. “I know the face of everyone who’s entered this park. And now you’re back…”
His thumb rubbed against your hip, playing with the fabric of your bottoms. “Why don’t you enjoy the park for a bit? I turned everything on just for you…”
And you did, hesitantly going up to the first ride.
He watched you go, his pants tightening. God, how long had it been since he’d felt the warmth of a woman?
Silly was cursed. He couldn’t leave the park, his very soul was tied to it. It stayed the same as it did the day it was abandoned, and he waited for someone to come back.
Why had people stopped coming? Not even the newspaper was allowed to print what happened.
A kid went missing near the park, and Silly had seen what happened. Someone impersonated him, luring the child away. He couldn’t do a single thing, not able to break character and leave to save the child.
It made Silly depressed, and he stopped allowing people to visit. Silly and the park were one being, if he was depressed, it would deteriorate.
But when he saw your car pull up, the rusted gates and old buildings became brand new, almost as if the park was perking up to impress you.
After going on several rides without waiting in lines and feasting on corn dogs, funnel cake, and lemonade, you let out a happy sigh.
“Having fun?”
You jumped slightly, relaxing when Silly came into view.
“Yeah… it’s been a long time since I’ve been to an amusement park. It’s been nice.”
He watched you, his eyes focusing on your soft tummy and fat tits. Never before had he taken such interest in a female.
He didn’t know much about what he was or how he came into existence, much less the nature of his urges, but he did know that he had needs…
And you did too.
Silly was attractive in a strange way. It was hard to describe his features, but something about him made you… horny. Maybe it was how tall he was, maybe it was the way he talked…
Before you knew it, you were being led away by the hand. You didn’t complain or try to escape his grip, in fact you were both curious and aroused. Where was he leading you?
Was it bad that being all alone with that clown in an abandoned park, having no idea where he was taking you made you horny?
Silly was struggling to keep himself together.
You were pulled into a tent, something slippery and slimy slipping between your legs as you were bent over. All you had to hold on to was a tent pole as silly grabbed your fat hips.
“God…” he murmured, his tentacle like cock slithering past your panties and rubbing against your glistening clit. “Need this…”
Without much warning he pushed in, groaning at how tight you were. It felt so strange, feeling him wriggle and writhe inside of your cunt.
The second he felt you clench around him he groaned, his body leaning into yours as he nibbled at your ear.
“So wet… pretty little thing, don’t you wanna just stay here forever? I’ll let you have the best day forever if I get to fuck into this pussy at the end of every night…”
His clown makeup dripped onto your shoulder, making you look back. Your vision was already a bit blurry from the pleasured tears falling from your eyes, but you swore you saw a strange creature behind you…
He forced you to look away, cooing softly. “Shh, don’t look, princess… I don’t want my pretty little thing going insane.”
His cum spurted inside of you, and you felt uncomfortable stretch when his cock began to go crazy, wiggling and squirming as if trying to burrow inside of you as deep as it could.
A soft growl left his throat as he settled down from his high, his thumb rubbing circles on your hip.
“Good girl… let’s get you cleaned up, hmm?”
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#clown x reader#clown smut#clown fucker#monster fucker#monster lover#monster fudger#monster boyfriend#monster fic#chubby!reader#chubby reader#terato#x reader#fem reader#teraphilia#terat0philliac#exophelia#teratophillia#female reader#monster smut#monster boy oc#monster fucking#monster imagine#fat reader#plus size reader#monster bf#monster x human#monster oc
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