#i just struggle sometimes
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hey girl i js wanna make sure youre okay😭 you havent posted at all and ik its only been one day but im worried, anywyas how are you and your mental health?
omg babi i love you so much 😭😭 thank you for worrying you literally have my whole heart!!!
i’m doing pretty good actually!! i’m just on vacation so i’m trying to keep up posting n writing but between beach time, drinking n fat naps it’s a lil hard lol
i was actually gunna post smth earlier but siked myself out cause i reread it n hated it. i’m struggling a little with writing cuz a lot of the requests i receive are super smutty or angsty n for characters im not super into rn n i honestly kinda just wanna write cute lil fluff for like Piper or Zuko but i dunno if you guys would read that??
I actually have a lot of stuff i don’t post like that cause you guys are asking for other things n when i do post it, it gets like 8 notes :(( it’s jus kinda disheartening when im trying to come back from a hard hiatus n it seems like posting what i wanna post doesn’t really matter n you guys jus want like constant smut instead
like i still write what i want to but posting it n seeing that nobody read it hurts esp when there’s such a high demand in my inbox yet when i post nobody reblogs or notes, makes me think like “why do i post when nobody cares?”
#when i get anons like u it makes me feel better!!#like some of u actually care abt me ya know??#i just struggle sometimes#thanks for caring!! love you bunches#oph.thoughts#oph.posts#oph.anons#oph.peaches
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Sometimes when I send my bf pics I wanna say “sorry I’m not pretty” but I hope he thinks I am
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the dialogue choices in this game should be more diabolical
#i love akechi but i sometimes i wish you could bully him like no matter which dialogue u pick it sounds like ur flirting back w him#“i'm going to be completely honest with you. i've always hated you” why can't u say smt unserious back#like “sorry i have a snatched waist and correct opinions on everything.” or like “ur loss lmao”#hate playing darts with this bitch bc i play on a steamdeck and i don't have a fucking gyroscope so like#it's trying to replicate how the joycons or pro controller would throw AND ITS SUCKS SO BAD#like i just see akechi get a hat trick every single fucking time with three bulls in a row and meanwhile im struggling to line the thing up#and then after u finish he's like “hmm i see. that's an interesting way to play it” WHAT THE FUCK THERES LITERALLY NO STRATEGY HERE SMARTAS#I JUST MISSED. IM NOT STRATEGIZING. THERES NOTHING “INTERESTING” ABOUT IT.#i hate going to penguin snipers so much i hope i can get this stupid game on switch so i can actually rank up akechi's baton pass#and not waste like 1000 yen every night bc i refuse to not let a party member be on rank 3#akechi fuck yourself why can't we play 501 like we do with everyone else. why do u have to make everything abt this stupid rivalry#im gonna kms i hate akeci and i hate darts#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#goro akechi#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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1.02 // 1.06 // 1.08 The Stranger vs. Sol on recognizing and differentiating Osha and Mae
#the acolyte#theacolyteedit#starwarsedit#osha x qimir#oshamir#osha aniseya#qimir the acolyte#sol the acolyte#star wars#mae aniseya#sometimes i make things#the acolyte dragging me back to fandom and gifmaking#i am not back on tumblr except i am just for this#i have a couple other gif ideas we'll see if i end up making them#there's something about sol's paternalistic attachment to osha leading him to tunnel vision when it comes to her#mae as an extension of osha#mae as the version that went wrong; corrupted;#whereas the stranger recognises and treats them as different people almost right away#and there is something so compelling to that#that even the person who claims to love you (and does love you in his own way) struggles to even recognise you#and will always see you as that little girl on brendok who needs saving#the stranger sees the parts of her that were unwanted; acknowledges her grief and anger and trauma#whereas the jedi and by extension sol saw that as a threat#ANYWAY im done i dont know anything about star wars except that i need this to be renewed asap
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sorry guys they finally showed me peak fiction . Its called “phantom of the paradise”
#phantom of the paradise#potp#winslow leach#swan potp#nightmaretheater#these were all done on the same canvas and i spent over 20 hours on it. Its just that good you know#Sorry this movie is making me VICIOUSLY IRREGULAR. its just that good. You have to watch it Now#i hope you dont mind the billion belts i have gifted winslow. she deserves them#lalalalal i love redesigning characters a little teeny weeny bit#Honestly. I want to draw swan more. I hate him so much but hes like really interesting. Im going to put him in situations#I miiight have changed a few details . giggle#…:i just had to give him a cool mark & blonde eyelashes Giggles#anyways i love ur shiny metal teeth winslow *thinks about the metaphorical implications and dehumanization for 10 hours*#So hard to draw her helmet sometimes… But i will willingly struggle . It is Okay!#anyways. Watch this movie now or suffer my curse
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Listen to me Suzanne Collins did not have to give Katniss and Peeta a history before the games. She did NOT have to do that. She could have just had their story begin when Peeta's name was called. She could have had them be total strangers until the moment of the reaping.
Like: "And the boy tribute is... Peeta Mellark!" Katniss: Who's that? Or she could have made them vaguely familiar with each other! Peeta's name is called and Katniss just thinks, Oh, I know that name! He's in my class, actually. Poor boy... Anyway!
Either way, SC could have written the rest of the story exactly the same! I think many authors would have done that! Because if Peeta's purpose in the book was to be Gale's competition, to be one of the 3 corners of a love triangle, THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE WAY TO DO IT!! But that's NOT how she did it because that's NOT what Peeta is.
And who is he? To Katniss, Peeta's someone who saved her and her family and received nothing in return except a beating. Peeta's someone she has had her eye on but has never worked up the courage to talk to. Peeta's someone she associates with kindness and hope. And all this before the start of the events of the book! Just because WE, the READERS, met Gale before Peeta and immediately felt a connection with him does NOT mean that was Katniss's experience! And that's what SC is trying to tell us!
To dismiss Katniss and Peeta's past as unimportant or inconsequential compared to whatever Katniss and Gale have in the present is to fundamentally misunderstand Katniss as a character and, as a result, condemn oneself to never fully understand the choices she makes in the future.
Suzanne Collins wrote it that way on purpose because she had something to say. And no one will ever be able to convince me that something wasn't "It was always going to be Peeta".
#thg#everlark#peeta mellark#katniss everdeen#the hunger games#sorry i hope this one's not too harsh#i just has to let it out lol#I'm not saying people only like gale because they misunderstand SC's writing#obviously everyone has preferences and that's great snd normal#but SC wrote Katniss to have preferences too?#and those preferences are pretty subtle at times I'll admit#but sometimes they're so glaringly obvious#i struggle to empathize with people who don't understand these books and honestly that's a me problem#but it really is difficult when people seem to hate Katniss because she didn't make THEIR choices#okay rant over
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distractions ✨
#for all the shooting range fics and what not#i was gonna make Leon’s face angry but i also think its cute that Luis cant see Leons soft expression#just hears the grumpy voice#i once again struggled with luis’ face… its hit or miss for me sometimes#not safe gun practices so don’t do it lol#serennedy#leon kennedy#leon s kennedy#luis serra#luis serra navarro#resident evil#resident evil 4#resident evil 4 remake#resident evil fanart#serennedy fanart
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The great thing about the White Collar OT3 is that at no point does the introduction of Neal into El and Peter's everyday lives never feels like a threat to Peter and El's marriage.
Like from the moment Neal shows up at their house in episode one he and El hit it off.
Within the first 5 episodes Neal and El have figured out they have similar knowledge and interest in the finer things, they're sharing looks over how Peter talks about and will react to things, El is telling Peter to trust in Neal a little, Neal is helping make sure they have a lovely anniversary, and El is calling Neal in to mediate/help prove her point in mini arguments to make Peter do stuff.
They also work really well because while Peter, El, and Neal might all be slightly different flavours and intensities of hyper competent adrenaline junkie weirdos, all three of them are intensely loyal to "their people" so the second El and Neal recognised that they both trust Peter as someone who will always try to do the right thing and respect them they were like "oh green flag."
#chirping wren#white collar#white collar ot3#elizabeth burke#peter burke#neal caffrey#its wild that peter is considered like Just Some Guy compared to them both#cause like he sorta is#he tries so hard bless his heart to just be a simple man with simple tastes and a simple life#and like he kinda succeeds#but also the dude's brain is always going#he stalked his wife prior to asking her out#he has an insane level of attention to detail when he chooses to apply it which is what makes him a brilliant white collar agent#he just struggles with connecting facts to emotions sometimes#el and neal both treat him as like their rock because he is so straightforward and upright#but also the man will leap into the most batshit situations at the drop of the hat if either of them asks him with big wet eyes#like sir that is not normal plain simple guy behaviour#so glad this show came across my dash again and got me on a rewatch#they are all so blorbo shaped and by god do i need that rn
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I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.
It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.
#mental health#mental health advocacy#like... anxiety and depression are often concieved of as simple and easy to manage...#...but that isn't the case for so many of us. anxiety and depression just have a lot more research invested into them...#...and while i wish this were the case for literally every other condition it does alter people's perception of you to some extent...#...so while this is NOT solely about anxiety or depression it includes us...#...my anxiety and depression and PTSD have *destroyed* my life. this is chronic and will probably be life-long...#...and that isn't my fault. i've done the fucking work but guess what? that doesn't account for the fact that I Am Just ILL#the least we can do for each other is to be compassionate#be compassionate to those who cannot heal. be compassionate to the people who can't manage their lives. this world is scary enough#recognize that management of symptoms is something not all of us can do - even IF their condition is labeled as 'easy to manage'#i allowed myself to feel angry that i can't heal 'normally' and that was unfair as fuck toward myself#and i NEED people to internalize this so that MAYBE this could help somebody else who is where i was#i NEED them to understand that it's okay that they are where they are - sometimes shit just doesn't turn out how you expect or want#don't beat yourself over you being a person. you are struggling enough. you deserve to rest. just rest please#and just... give yourself space
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i am in love with your sollux i think
sollux love party :]
if you’re interested heres some of my personal fondness thoughts on him.. big warning for the mega long read ahead aye
as we alr know sollux's rejection of participation somewhat mirrors dave's rejection of heroism, but even without getting cooked to completion i still find sollux's character v compelling beyond the fourth wall
as someone who doesnt get a pinch of that Protagonist Sparkle to begin with, he can openly say he wants to leave anytime…. and unlike dave, he actually Can leave the scene anytime. but he can never be truly Free from the story via permanent character death like the other trolls.
his irrelevancy is indeed relevant - he’s there so u can point him out.
while his image is intended to be a relic of past internet subculture, his role is not only about hehehaha being a Chad or a 2000s cyberforum 2²chan haxxor ragequit gamebro.
his continued existence also happens to add a Bit to the overarching themes of homestuck! a Bit that gives him longer-lasting thematic relevance compared to the trolls who could’ve had more character potential but didnt get to survive beyond the main story.
the Bit in question:
his defiance contributes to the illusion of agency (treating characters = people with autonomy). he’s “aware” of it, and that recognition is worth noting enough to forcibly keep him alive as both reward and punishment.
considering how his personality & classpect is designed its definitely a very haha thing for hussie to do LOL. he’s made to be op asf so he's resigned to doing dirty work, gradually deteriorating along the way but never truly dying. as fans have mentioned before, him openly rejecting involvement after a while of grim tolerance is like if the sim u were controlling suddenly stopped, looked up and gave u the finger while u were step six into the walkthrough for Every Possible Sim Death Animation.
but since he’s just a sim… the more he hates it, the more you keep him around. if ur sim started complaining abt your whimsical household storyline you’d definitely keep that little fuck.
but yeah i like that sollux is just idling. the significance of his presence being that one dude who's always reliably Somewhere, root core Unchanged, no individual ambitions (possibly due to fear of consequence?), and design-wise: a staple representative product of his time.
compared to dirk's character, who has aged phenomenally well into the present (themes of control + AR + artificial intelligence, clearer exploration around navigating relationships/sexuality, infinite possibilities of self-splinterhood and trait inheritance), sollux's potential is really... contained. bitter. defeatist. limiting and frustrating in the way old tech is.
the world continues moving on to shinier, brighter, more advanced automated things - minimalist and metaverse or whatever but sollux is still here 🧍♂️ going woohoo redblue 3d. (tho personally i imagine his vibe similar to what the kids call cassette futurism on pinterest mixed w more grimy grunge insectoid influences eheh)
conceptually-speaking,
at the foundation of it all, the rapid pace of modern development was built off the understanding of ppl like sollux in the past, who were There actively at work while the dough was still beginning to rise
thats one of the cool things abt the idea of trolls preceding humans! the idea that trolls like sollux excelled back when lots of basic shit still needed to be discovered, building structures like networks and codes from scratch, and humans will eventually inherit and reinvent that knowledge in ways that become so optimized it makes the old manual effort seem archaic, slow, and labour-intensive.
but despite information/resources/shortcuts being more accessible now, much of the new highly-anticipated stuff released on trend still end up unfinished, inefficient, or expiring quickly due to cutting corners under severe capitalistic pressures
meanwhile, some of the old stuff frm past generations of thorough, exploratory and perfectionistic development still remains working, complete, and ever so sturdy.
those things continue to exist, just outside our periphery with either:
zero purpose left for modern needs (outdated/obsolete)
or
far too important to replace or destroy, bcs of its surprisingly essential and circumstantial usefulness in one niche specific area.
which are honestly? both points that sum up sollux pree well.
dramatic ending sorry. anw are u still on the fence or are u Sick abt him like me </3
#ask#anon#sollux captor#homestuck#hs2 spoilers#2023#vioart#hs2 sollux explaining girls and bitches to john: 🗣️🗣️🗣️#mr foods‚ setting up the visuals: LMAO ok pause. cool story bro theyre all gone its just u n ur sandwich bro.#now that i think abt it sol's kind of a toaster? awkwardly takes up countertop space#lacks the versatility and sociability of an air fryer/pressure cooker. unwashed and littered w crumbs!#but sometimes the clear‚ frank simplicity of the toaster is a temporary lifesaver for ppl who struggle w low appetite / decision fatigue#or ppl who just have a habit of eating toast for breakfast LOL#and eh ¯\ _(ツ)_/¯ even if u dont feel like toasting today thats ok he's still gonna be sitting there 👍👍#a funnyman..... i curse him in my pan but root for him in my biscuit 🫶
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how are you so in love with yourself...this is not me accusing you of narcissism or smth i genuinely am in awe of how much you seem to like yourself and be in love with yourself and I try so hard to be like you and do that too but i fail every single time...i really really want to know how I could be like this too because i know it is one of the biggest things stopping me from achieving happiness
Not sure if this is a ubiquitous experience, but for me personally affirmations can only go so far. There’s always been a direct correlation between me doing action-based things and my self-esteem increasing, so I try to keep my promises to myself (study at x time, work out at y time, just doing whatever I need to do even if I don’t have the motivation for it). Someone told me that self-esteem comes w doing esteemable things, and I’ve never forgotten that since. What someone thinks about me (including the gargoyle voice in my head lol) won’t faze me if I have tangible accomplishments under my belt I can refer back to on bad days
#Also like#I definitely have bad days but most times I keep that to myself#This is my blog & I want to engage w it how I want#So sometimes I’ll post about it but most times I won’t#Social media is fr an illusion and no one is just winning 100% of the time#A lot of people struggle but don’t share it#And no one really owes us their sadness so we can’t demand for people to share it either tbh#I wouldn’t use someone’s blog presence as a compass for how you “should” be#You’d be so surprised what people go through behind closed doors#Even the ones who seem like they’re jovial all the time
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im sure this has been done before but idc
art creds: group drawing -sas milledge from raven boys graphic novel ronan pfp - auro cyanide on deviantart and tumblr kavinsky pfp - maggie stiefvater
#trc#the raven cycle#ronan lynch#joseph kavinsky#rovinsky#the raven boys#the dream thieves#blue lily lily blue#the raven king#kavinsky my dramatic king#i have a love hate relationship with him#like he's awful but also kinda funny sometimes??#and also was just deeply struggling#but still an asshole#adam parrish#blue sargent#richard gansey#i love fake tweets of them#fourth of july#the rovinsky national holiday
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idk but tim's skills both in comics and in fanon are so inconsistent. like wdym he can fight azrael and ra's and lady shiva and he loses fights to... damian? like ok damian is a good fighter, trained by assassins and whatnot but it makes no sense, bc he wouldn't win against shiva
or like tim barely being able to hold out against jason both times he attacks him seriously (battle for the cowl and titan's tower).... but winning against all sort of weird ass shit in young justice?
im not even talking about how his intellect is all over the place, one day he is lying to batman and fooling doomsday and the other he is truly getting trapped/fooled by shitty ass villains like Calendar Man
#his skills are all over the place i never know if he is a good fighter or just mediocre#i never know if he is a good fighter or not#i could do a whole chart being like damian cannot beat cass who struggles to beat her mother who tim beat but that would be long#or like#is he smart?#sometimes the others are Just Dumb which is a writing mistake in my opinion#which is why i tend to think about tim as like a spencer reid kind of person#surrounded by smart people but being truly That Smart#tim drake as spencer reid#tim drake#batman#red robin#dc#young justice#tim drake wayne#batfamily#bruce wayne#jason todd
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so ik it’s not cannon accurate but,,,
i need a fic of tim just crashing out.
like he gets so sick of like damian and jason talking about how weak he is and shit like that that he’s like “yall realize lady shiva was my one of my FIRST teachers, and i was the first robin she trained. i had to train under b AFTER he already lost a robin. you DONT think he was 10x harder on me than any of you guys???? there’s a reason my training videos are mainly redacted without bruce’s or my permission. i got ra’s al ghul BEGGING ME to join his league or have my children. i get gifts from him WEEKLY. do you KNOW how many of his little ninja i fight per DAY??? nahh im sick of this shit let’s take it to the mats” and just demolishing both of them at the same time.
i just think it’d be very funny. i just like fics of people who pretend to be weaker than they are(or they just never really have a reason to go full tilt so they just don’t) get sick of holding back and just losing it :D
#batfam#tim drake#red robin#jason todd#red hood#damian wayne#robin#unhinged tim drake#batfamily shitposts#i just need fics of tim losing his shit and crashing out#just because they are funny#and i sometimes feel like people would forget that just because he’s smart does not mean he doesn’t have hands#like bro all robins are certified villains only being held back by b’s rules#they all have insane hands and are all very smart#don’t get distracted by whichever one they choose to put at the forefront of their personality so you forget about the other#but basically yeah i just want it bc it’d make me giggle#also yes ik bruce never physically abused tim during training but i love the angst fics that use that so i added it anyways#i. don’t think it was like intentional on bryce’s part tho just that he was struggling so hard with his grief#he just never noticed how hard he was pushing tim until he pushed wayyyy too far#and yeah he and tim eventually resolved their issues and had a BIG talk about training boundaries#but only after he started getting a bit better and got it through his head that tim was just a kid and not a moving punching bag#i like to think it was only after like titans tower or some other time where he was very close to losing tim tho#bc as much as i want bruce to just be a good dad all the time he had struggles actually verbalizing his feelings#and apologizing for his mistakes
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I don’t like getting intense over petty things, but why are people calling large paragraphs “bad formatting” now. It’s just formatting. Sometimes, a larger paragraph serves its text well, and sometimes it doesn’t, and there is a LOT more that goes into making a text block readable than length alone.
Please please please fucking please stop inventing all-encompassing arbitrary rules about what features define “good” art and “bad” art.
#writeblr#i mean this lovingly and politely#flow of paragraphs is important to me!#if most of your paragraphs are three-to-one sentences that’s not necessarily a bad thing BUT#it does keep you from pulling off some real OOMPH stuff#for example;#large paragraphs to convey one-track racing thoughts#the absolute hit of a one-sentence wham line after a longer introspection#PARAGRAPH VARIETY#look variety in paragraph length ALSO helps people keep track of where they are in a text#in the same way that breaking up *too* large paragraphs can help!#babes i mean this very gently; if you struggle with large paragraphs then you may need to work on your attention span a little#(and that is not an indictment against you as a person)#also i struggle with continuous short paragraphs! It breaks up my reading experience & increases scroll time (sometimes for no reason)#much in the same way that overly large spaces between paragraphs makes me struggle#accessible text formatting is a nuanced topic#i’m sorry we just have so many feelings about this#related topics and actions are allowed to be kept in the same paragraphs for flow reasons okay??? okay
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Damen when Laurent is in a mood
#i love how he struggles with knowing logically that laurent is the one being unreasonable sometimes#but wanting to just throw everyone who upsets laurent off the battlements anyways#he's like 'it's your fault for making him mad actually'#captive prince#my post
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