#i just sent in the script i wanted read initially but was worried would get rejected

[durgeapologist]

your guys' reblogs on my dreadrook gdl cameo audio are making me giggle SO FUCKING HARD!!! if you're new to my blog (there's a lot of you hi i love you all sooooooo bad) THEN JUST WAIT ANOTHER WEEK. i'm not saying i did it again...

but that's exactly what i'm saying.

[nctinkverse]

Promissa Redux - Chapter 3

Synopsis: A life-altering phone call from Jaehyun prompts reflection on your personal life and career choices. Despite initial confusion and concern, he surprises you with a movie script offer. Memories intertwine with present decisions, revealing a longing for closeness. Accepting the script becomes a opportunity to have your best fried back, you miss the banter and tender moments you had with him more than you thought you did.

Warnings: minors do not interact!, for this chapter we've got a little angst, smut and crude words.

Pairing: jaehyun x f. reader

Word count: 1.760

Autor note: This chapter takes us back to Jaehyun call we saw in the preview of Promissa Redux, some parts are a little more detailed and at the end, there's a flashback were we get a glimpse of what their relationship as a married couple looked like. Sorry for taking so much time to update and enjoy!

Unauthorized copying or translation of this work is strictly prohibited.

-------- Preview with all the warnings and Chapter 2 -------------------

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Chapter 3 - One call away is not close enough

A call two years later changed everything.

Your career…

Your personal life as well.

You were fast asleep when the phone rang. Jaehyun’s name on the screen made you alert, is he alright? Did something happen?

Laying your back on the headboard you answered the call.

“Hi” he said using a normal tone. That made you a little less worried.

“Jaehyun, is something wrong?”

“Oh, no… I’m sorry… I didn’t check the time difference. I should have called another-

“Jae…spill, what’s the gossip, huh?”

He let out a little laugh since the gossip thing that a old joke between you two.

“No gossip, but I do have something.”

“Clearly, it’s something good or you wouldn’t be calling on impulse, spill, Jaehyun.”

“Yeah right…” He hesitated a bit coughing a bit, his telltale sign that he was nervous.

“I got sent this script for a movie, they want me as the main character…” He hesitated again which made you ask.

“Jeong Jaehyun, what did you do?”

“I sent a copy of the script to your mailbox.”

You could feel your sleepiness vanishing as you started to scold him.

“Jaehyun, are you nuts? You can’t ship stuff like this in the mail! What if gets – “

"It got delivered today." He interrupted, making you stop your thinking.

Scrambling for a thought since he didn’t elaborate, you asked.

"What the hell am I supposed to do with it?! I’m not a male actor, Jung."

"Read, dummy, read."

"And do what?"

"Tell me if you want it."

You opened your mouth to be obnoxious, pointing out the obvious, but Jaehyun must have listened to your 'I’m about to give you an earful' breath and went first.

"Listen, it’s an amazing script, just like the ones you used to want to work on. There’s an opening for a cinematographer, and I know you’re a hell of a good one, so if you want, it’s yours." He said in one breath, probably afraid you would interrupt again.

But from all he said, this part really got you confused.

"What do you mean it’s mine?"

"I showed the director your profile and portfolio, and he said yes."

"Fuck, Jaehyun." You didn’t know what to say since he was never one to interfere in your personal life since the D word.

"You’re sleepy, and I know how grumpy you can be at this hour, so… I still must tell you two more things, the job is in the states, probably 3-4 months of filming, and I am supposed to give an answer on the male character in 48 hours. We would have to work together, and we would probably have to strike a deal with my parents since we can’t pull Junnie out of school, so…"

You understood what he said, but you needed at least a cup of coffee to process it. But before you could say anything, he went off again.

"I can give it up if you want." He said almost like a whisper.

"Give what up?"

"The character."

"You didn’t like it?"

"No, but –

You interrupted again.

"So, if you do like it, why would you give it up?" It made no sense to you.

"For you –"

It still didn’t make sense why he would give it up.

"Give it up for ME?"

"I like it, Y/N, but this script has you written all over it… and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable by being there."

Now you got him, yet he was about the last person in this world who could make you uncomfortable.

"Yuno…" You said in a softer tone.

You heard his breath and a soft "yeah?"

"I don’t hate you." You stated in your most soft yet firm tone, it was one of the things he must not forget about you two.

"I know, Y/N, I know."

"I am going to read it and think about what you said, ok? Don’t do anything hasty."

"Ok, I will let you go back to sleep."

"I’m not sleeping after all this, you know right?" You said, letting out a small huff.

"I know."

"What I am about to do is getting up, making some coffee and grabbing the script out of my mailbox, does it sound good to you?" You were being just a bit playful.

"It does, love."

That word made you warm like butter melting on a frying pan. Still, that wasn’t something out of the ordinary for him to call you. So, you let it slide.

"Well, for sure it’s better than staying in bed tossing and turning."

He let out a small giggle, he knew you were one of those to fight a lot with your bed at night.

"Good morning, love."

"Good afternoon to you?" You didn’t know what time zone he was on, so you tried.

"Try again." He said with a smiling voice.

"Good night!" You said like you had guessed the lottery numbers.

He let out a giggle sound and said, "Give little Nari 1000 kisses from me, will you?”

"Why just a thousand?" You said with a little pout as if he could see.

You could hear his playful tone in reply.

"Don’t you know our daughter? She might ask for in real life a thousand kisses; since you are the closest parent, you might fall victim to it, so I think that’s a great number for kisses."

You both giggled, Jung Nari, the lily to our garden, was at that phase where hyperbole would be a tough concept for her to grasp.

"Ok, fine." You agreed still giggling.

"I will call… stay safe."

"You too, Jaehyun."

With that you decided to get up put some warm clothes, while the coffee maker did her job, you went downstairs to get the script from your mailbox.

When the coffee was ready you got back to your room and pulled the curtains up letting a little of the city lights get into your room. Turning on your lamp you seated yourself on your favorite chair.

The script was big, over 200 pages, there was no way you would finish it before Nari would wake up, but when you reached page 50 you decided it was okay to close it.

Jaehyun was right, it was exactly the type of script you wanted to work with. You were deeply touched he even remembered you talking about it…

-----

“I believe in you.”

“You do?” You asked raising your head from Jaehyun’s chest so you could look at his eyes. “I don’t think I can do it, I think it’s too late”.

He was already shaking his head even before you could finish.

“It’s not late, if you want to change careers you know what to do, I don’t doubt for a second, you’ll get there.”

You were deeply touched by his words. It’s not like you thought he wouldn’t be supportive, you just never imagined needing to hear his genuine tone, the way he looked into your eyes ensuring you could perceive every feeling he conveyed.

Raising your head a little, you gave him a kiss. It was a sweet ‘thank you’ one.

When you disconnected and snuggled even more close to him on the couch, using your leg over his hips to feel every part of you against his comfortable warm body.

“So, I’m curious, if you could pick a type of movie to work on, what it would be like?”

“An 80’s movie for sure.”

“Why baby?”

“Well, you know they are my favorites, the whole boombox thing outside a girls window it's a classic, I also like Ten Reasons Why I Hate You, I love the whole enemies to lovers it’s an amazing plot if done right.”

“I don’t think you can work on movies like enemies to lovers, you might get a crush on Heath Ledger and I could lose my wife.”

You smacked the upper part of his butt for the almost funny insult.

“I do not have a crush on Heath Ledger!”

“Oh yeah babe, you do, you have all his movies.”

“Yes! Because he was an amazing actor!”

“Are you sure he’s not handsome?”

“No!”

“You literally drool when he is on screen baby…”

“Fine! That’s just because he has dimples!”

“Oh, I knew it!”

“You have dimples too, so shut it, Jae.”

“Oh, you’re soo nervous, you’re-

You stopped his sentence with a kiss. A warm one this time, you were trying to make a point so he would forget about stupid cute Heath Ledger and just kiss you dumb.

It took only a few seconds to feel his tongue invade your mouth, playing with yours, his hand that was on your lower back traveled to your butt check and he pressed your body even closer to his.

You moaned, his cock pressing very close to where you needed him, he lowered his lips to your neck. Using your hand, you guided his head to the spot you needed him, your fingers right over one of the dimples you loved so much.

“Yuno…I don’t like other man’s dimples, I just like yours…” You said between breaths.

Against your neck he let out a small laugh.

“Yeah baby, how much?”

“I like it so fucking much I want you to pass it on to our kids.”

“Oh, kids.”

“Yes, kids.” You also replied with your body undulating against his, all tingly with excitement.

He left your neck to tease your lips with his.

“Plural. Interesting.”

You just nodded pleading with your eyes for him to kiss you fully.

“So, you like the idea of babies…

“Not really the point.”

“So, what is the point?” He kissed you a little harder for a few seconds but pulled away again.

“I like trying to make babies with you so much, I know one day I’m going to go insane and tell you to forget the condoms.”

“Or maybe one day I will fuck you so hard and soo good the condom would break.” He completed.

“That’s exactly my point. Now stop being a tease.”

He laughed but finally went back to kissing you.

------

You shook your head so the memory would go away, Jaehyun was the love of your life, your already happy ending was Nari.

But you missed your best friend.

He had a strange sense of humor, was calm and knew what to say every time you needed him.

You missed him so much, so that’s how you convinced yourself to accept the script. Maybe it was a way you could also be close to your best friend again.

---------------

Taglist:

@dulyrana @clblnz 💚

@electric-hearts @hyuukah @baeseungcheolie @girlinbangtan @johnbanana @fashion-addictedd @peachfulnight @angel63715 @daegalismybiasinnct @chloemargaret @phattyboo90 @oyasueme @peachfulnight 💚💚

@lijennoow @crazywittysassy @matchaforyanna @ihrtsolana @the-universe-in-you-jjh @iarayara @mrsuhnshine @dilfjohnnyaf @xuyiyang @monstanctiny21 @jccv @peachytokki @jaescafe 💚💚💚

The ones in bold are the ones I wasn't able to tag and will be sending the update in priv.

This chapter was a pain in the &&& to post coz tumblr keeps NOT letting me post anything so it's missing spaces and format so so sorry about that.

Tysm!

[thatpunnyperson]

I highly recommend going and reading the wikipedia articles on this travesty. I just finished combing through the sources cited on these wikipedia pages and the timeline of events is absolutely baffling, and I'm putting them under a cut with my comments because its ridiculous and frustrating

Schwartz logged into his own JSTOR account given to him because he was a professor/scholar at Harvard and MIT

Schwartz used a script to download a ton of articles and papers off of JSTOR because he wanted PDF copies of as much as possible so he could host them all for free for use by people who didnt have access to academic repositories like JSTOR

JSTOR saw that they were suddenly getting insane traffic to their site and that a bunch of pdfs of articles and papers were being downloaded

JSTOR decided to NOT call up MIT or send an email to whomever they had as a contact (because academic institutions typically have one person who manages an account for sites like JSTOR, and that account is what authorizes all of the professor and scholar and student accounts people get through the university)

JSTOR decided to impose a blanket block/ban on all ip addresses at MIT, and THEN they sent an email explaining that the block was intentional and that MIT needs to figure out what is happening and fix it in order to get unblocked.

MIT asked around and found out Schwartz was the one downloading all the papers, and they told him to cut that shit out so they could get unblocked

JSTOR decided that Schwartz should be punished in some way because everyone was worried about criminals doing things on computers, and JSTOR was concerned that Schwartz had been using the mass downloading to cover up some criminal act like stealing passwords or something

Schwartz gets arrested and investigation is done into Exactly what he was doing, and they find that he was literally just downloading PDFs of articles and papers.

Up until this point, the ENTIRE problem was that JSTOR overreacted to a bump in traffic to their site and someone in the company opted to block all ip traffic from MIT before contacting anyone at MIT to get context for the increased traffic. Had JSTOR--Had that ONE JSTOR employee thought a little longer about things, had they literally just contacted and communicated with MIT about the issue, everything would have resolved calmly and cleanly.

But since JSTOR had Schwartz arrested so they could legitimize investigating him and his behavior, he became known by the Federal Government and it decided that they needed to make an example of Schwartz.

Through several months of investigations and court cases, JSTOR dropped all of its charges from that initial arrest because the investigation showed that Schwartz had commit zero crimes. MIT also dismissed the charges it was considering because, again, the investigation showed zero crimes had been commited.

But some guy named Heymann in the federal government decided to start charginf Scwartz with things like wire fraud and damage of a "protected" computer, and several other things because of a computer security law that had been put into place as a way of prosecuting various tech crimes. Despite all of the original people involved in Schwartz's case saying, "nah, we're dropping all of our charges, we were just a bit overzealous and that was wrong," this one guy Heymann and his whole office decided to be what many people now consider to be criminally reckless with random charges of various computer crimes.

Schwartz's lawyer even submit a complaint to the equivalent of the ethics board at the federal attorney general's office stating that Heymann threatened to get Schwartz put away in prison for 7 years if he disnt agree to a plea deal involving pleading guilty to 13 felony charges in exchange for only 6 months in prison.

I am not at all surprised that Schwartz killed himself, considering that his reputation in academia had been ruined by this entire debacle, and that despite almost overwhelming public support for his actions, the federal government had an almost violently determined prosecutor trying to get him to give a false confession.

And although it seems like the federal government is the only one at fault here, and that JSTOR is actually still clean, if JSTOR hadnt had him arrested erroneously that first time, NONE of the ensuing chicanery would have happened and Schwartz may still be alive today.

All of this happened back in 2010-2012, and it's not hyperbolic to say it is JSTOR's fault and that Schwatrz's blood is on their hands.

ok so tumblr also really needs this reminder based on some posts ive seen around lately, the "babygirlification" of JSTOR is bad. like Bad Bad. did you all just collectively forget history? did you alll just forget they have blood on their hands? just because they publish science stuff in an ever so slightly more ethical way than springer and are a little silly on social media sometimes? JSTOR killed aaron swartz (wikipedia). in his fight for freedom of information he downloaded papers off of jstor (with acedemic access from MIT) to share and make freely accessible (as all information should be), for this he was charged with wire fraud, computer fraud, unlawfully obtaining information from a protected computer, and recklessly damaging a protected computer. he was facing up to 50 years in prison and a 1 million USD fee for a simple act of downloading files he lawfully had access to. with this court case the US government drove one of the most important online activists and programmers (he is behind so much stuff you all take for granted) into suicide in the name of JSTOR.

JSTOR isn't the cool girl on the block. this isnt a call to boycott them (though please learn how to use things such as sci-hub and fight for open science and freedom of information in general please <3), but please dont glorify them as some sort of cutesy platform.

[aimeehfilms]

'Office', FW - Planning

For Film Workshop, we were put into groups and randomly assigned a short script stimulus as an exercise. This learning process aided inspiration and expanded my knowledge on how scripts can be interpretated in different ways. Since I was writer for this role, I began expanding on the different ways in which the script could be interpretated.

It is important to mention that before we were assigned a stimulus, all of them were displayed for us to read. I had began interpretating all the scripts in advance so that I'd have an idea for every one no matter which one we got. Interestingly, for one of them I had pictured a hitman scenario (we will get back to why this is relevant later). In the end, it was difficult for me to expand on these ideas as we had not yet been assigned actors which would change the characters drastically and therefore impact the story.

Out of all the stimuli, the 'Office' stimulus was the one I wanted the least and the one that we received. I found this quite challenging as 'Office' was as implied set in an office. Usually as a writer I tend to lean towards the fantasy and supernatural genre. I felt that with an office setting there wasn't a more mundane environment we could have been given. Also my knowledge on office environments in general was very limited which worried me so I began to ask questions and research more into it to make sure the script would be realistic. However, the workshopping was far from over.

After we were assigned actors, we began collaborating as a group in workshops. I found interacting with actors very helpful, engaging and a vital part of my learning. Combining both languages of film, the filmmaker's point of view and the perspective of an actor.

At first I would discuss only with the director different possible ideas for the script. This is a problem due to my lack of confidence when discussing my ideas to a whole group, finding it easier to discuss with less people. Additionally, with my experience in past groups, I was used to following what the majority wanted without either having my ideas heard or having them kept to myself altogether. This is a problem that I am working on. Unfortunately though, this meant that in the workshops, where ideas were brought to the table, my more drastic changes to the first story were held back.

The initial story involving the employer and employee was not working for me. However, I did not mention this straight away as I wanted to see where it went and what could come from it. I was also self-conscious that it was perhaps only me that felt like it was not working. As we carried on with this story I began to panic as the idea of writing a script for this did not inspire me. I felt stuck in writers block during these workshopping weeks, struggling to feel connected with the story. I also tended to still daydream different possible stories as I knew it just was not working for me.

I tried to connect with the inital 'Office' story however I was worried as a short film it would be quite boring. I didn't understand the characters stakes and motivations, in particular, the idea that a boss would give away their best employee to a job that they also initially wanted. We tried to work around this but I just could not grasp it. This led me to send more ideas to the director and my thoughts and feelings.

One day before the workshop, I had watched a youtube video, out of curiousity, about a fake hitman site which was used to catch criminals that believed it was real. For out stimulus I was trying to interpretate different things that people can 'apply' for as one of the lines of dialogue was 'So are you going to apply?'. In the video people could apply for a hitman or even apply to become a hitman (which led to one man also being arrested). As an idea I sent it to the director before our workshop, suggesting it even though it was a drastic change to what we were all working on. I am proud that I was able to do this and looking back I wish I had mentioned it sooner.

During the workshop that day, I noticed one of the actors in particular losing their joy for the project. Both actors seemed less enthusiastic about the idea and no matter how many times we went over it, personally it felt like we were getting nowhere. One of the actors then gestured to me as the writer, asking if I was inspired by this story. Realising that it was not just me feeling this way, I finally relayed to the whole group that I did not feel inspired by the story. This led to the actor agreeing and the director suggesting we try the hitman idea I had mentioned earlier that morning. I began explaining to the rest of the group the idea that we could try. Everyone seemed happy with giving it a go and I felt excited again about the project.

All of a sudden it was like everyone had more energy, especially the actors. As a group we seemed to be having more enjoyment with the story and I felt inspired again to write. The producers told me that they are happy that we swapped the idea and that they preferred it too. I was discussing different ways we could take the story with the group and we all collaborated. I was no longer nervous to voice my opinions and openly discuss my ideas. Reflecting on this, I wish I had spoken out sooner. I understand how a lack of self-confidence can impact the collaborative process and I am glad we were able to overcome it.

I will attach the rough notes I made to the director about possible ideas for the initial 'office' prompt. I was struggling to come up with something interesting and I am glad we didn't go through with these.

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

I. a foolish request

✘ Synopsis : Sending the message felt foolish, you didn’t know what you were expecting, and once the message was sent you started questioning who actually ran the account. Maybe it was fear from the last three years of hell, or maybe… just maybe, you knew there would be more…

✘ TW : heavy mention of COVID and lockdowns : trauma ; fear ; anxiety ;

✘ Pairing : ? x F!Reader

✘ Word Count : 793

﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Call it a sensation, call it a premonition, call it whatever you’d like… Something made you pick up your phone that day and send the message. It wasn’t something that you’d usually do, but it felt like you had to, like something was coming, and it wasn’t something that you could fight off or keep away, it wasn’t something that you could protect yourself from, not entirely. 

Things were getting bad again, and while the first time had become slightly bearable, you knew that this would be much worse, you just… felt it. Maybe others could do, or maybe they didn’t, drawn into their own lives and just wanting things to be normal again… You did too… But you knew that after everything that had happened… Would things ever really be normal or would they just get gradually worse again, everyone thinking that it’s just another bump in the road before full normalcy is acquired. 

With fingers tapping rapidly across your screen, your drive to help out those that you didn’t really know other than what you had seen on the internet overcoming you with such power, it felt like you couldn’t do anything else until you did this. You didn’t even think twice about it before sending the message, only reading over it after the message had been delivered. Who would even read that message? Who would it go to? Surely they don’t run their own instagram account… Someone else is doing it for them, so who got it? A loud groan escaped you as you awkwardly typed out an apology, or moreso, a message that would hopefully make whoever read the first one disregard just how crazy you sounded. 

Living on your own during the pandemic was something that you initially thought you’d enjoy, not having to go to work, being able to sleep in whenever you wanted, not really doing much at all… But as time drew on, your feeling of loneliness grew and grew until you were begging to escape the four walls that surrounded you, what used to be home feeling more like a prison cell. 

There was nothing to do once everything had been done. All of the movies that you loved had been watched and rewatched until you knew the script by heart and would walk around talking to yourself quoting the words that the actors on screen had said. The amount of deliveries that you got to your house was enough to where you knew the delivery man’s name and would greet him as if he were like an old friend instead of someone that was delivering your groceries. What’s worse is that those times when he’d come would be the only source of interaction that you had with the world outside, at least in person. 

You kept in touch with family as much as you could, but the want to go back home, to be in solitude with those that you loved the most had you almost wishing you had no one at all. It was much harder to deal with knowing that there was no way for you to get to them, having to settle for phone calls or video calls to keep in contact, to make sure they were okay. 

It was terrifying, but you made it, although you weren’t really sure how far you had gotten considering you had become a shell of what you once were. Fear of the outside was just one of the things that stuck with you, not wanting to go near anyone or anywhere for that matter, worrying about the first person who might have coughed in your general area, the sound of a clearing throat having you sprinting on the complete opposite side of the store you might have been in. It wasn’t just fear though, it was anxiety inducing, and what once felt like home, and then a prison, had once again turned into a safe haven, somewhere that you knew you wouldn’t have to worry about anything. You were safe in the confines of these four walls, and inside them housed everything that you might need if anything were to ever happen. The worst isn’t exactly the worst… we’ll never know what the worst really is unless something even more dreadful happens afterwards, and that’s the sinking feeling that you always got. 

This wasn’t the worst, nobody had seen it, yet everyone believed it had already come and gone. There was more to come though, that much you were sure of, and while you didn’t know exactly when, you knew that it would happen. That’s why you had sent out the foolish request, you just hoped that they’d be able to finish the tour and make it home before shit hit the fan. 

masterlist / next

[taegularities]

colour me in: commentary (script)

⋙ wc: 7.3k⋙ a/n: sooo, i figured some don't have the time to listen to a 73 mins audio, so i wrote out this script if it's easier for some of y'all! of course it'd be great if you still support the commentary and listen whenever you're able to, since that was the point of an audio commentary and it was quite a bit of work 😮‍💨 but i hope this is helpful for busy bees like me <3 took me 2 hours to script like i thought it'd be easier than that lmao 😭 i even made a banner!! is it pretty 😁 in any case, enjoy and give it lotsa love and let me know your thoughts to my thoughts if you'd like! 🤍

Tiny glimpses into what was and what will be.

Went through it all one by one. Thank you to everyone who sent something in!! Enjoy!! <3

By Axelle/ @jkaxl

If cmi wasn’t written "for" kookoo, which member do you think the story would have been suitable for?

Honestly, it truly did start out as a Kook story, so there was never anyone else I even considered. But if I had to switch members, or think of switching members, Ii’d probably choose Joon? Purely because I feel like he as the ultimate comfort person vibe that would fit that comforting role well, too. Or Tae, because of the initial fuckboy/friends with benefits trope. I feel like he’s a good choice for that in general. Honestly cannot imagine CMI as a Jin or Hobi or Yoongi story. Maybe Jimin. But then I'd have to change his major, which circles back to me not being able to imagine anyone but Jungkook in this role — because I don’t quite see Jimin as an arts major. Do you guys? Have you guys read an artist!Jimin thing before? I’d be curious to know! So yeah, the artist bit and colours are just so important for CMI, so I guess I’d stick with Tae or Joon, yep.

Be honest!!!! Your favorite scene so far as a writer pov AND as a reader pov (cause of course you read your stuff after writing it :)

Gosh, honestly, I do get scared rereading my stuff. So for example, with Blooming, I spent hours editing the same scene, so I never reread a single word after posting it, because I’m so scared of rereading and finding more mistakes in it. Like, when I was editing it, I was constantly wondering… Does any of this even make sense? As an example, when Jungkook was talking about liking waking up early in the morning now, those were around six-ish paragraphs, but I spent hours editing them!

But anyways, that’s not what you asked. Very interesting question though, because i've never thought about it like this before.

If I had to answer spontaneously…

I’d say, from a writer’s point of view, the pregnancy scare. Because I know, they felt terrible, but writing about their worries and how they handled it and fought the fear together was what I loved the most. I also got the chance to be dramatic, which is something I would never not do. I had been excited about it for quite a while – and with quite a while I mean summer 2021, when I came up with CMI. I've always wanted to include a pregnancy scare.

Also the flashbacks in Blurred since I very much enjoy switching between the past and present. But with this one, I wasn’t sure if it would work out. But I think I managed, and it came out nicely, especially with the outline I had for it. This is something I’d actually reread! I don’t know, I just really love diving into their past, and how their relationship started and bloomed.

And from a reader’s pov, I’d say the dark alley scene in Monochrome. Which is kind of self-explanatory, so many of you liked it, and honestly… same. But also a couple scenes in Lights, especially when Jungkook calls her while drunk. He could’ve spent time with his family and was incredibly busy, but was still just craving that one phone call to tell her that he’d burnt his finger before she went to sleep. And when she asks whether that was all he needed to tell her, he responds with, “No, also to tell you that I missed you.” Which gives me heart eyes even after one year and a half! 

I also just love Blooming as a whole. It made me realise how much I love writing fluff and how it comes just as easily to me as sad stuff, which I thought was the thing I was the best at. But I feel like I’m not that bad at writing cute things either? Lol, and I really hope you felt how much I adored writing it, too.

Which is also why I’m so so so excited for CMI12, I've said it a hundred times and I’ll say it a million times more, but still… it's called Palette, by the way! And it's gonna be great! I hope—

Are we going to see more of hobi?

Mmmh. Not as an important character. I know he’ll come back in some way… but he won’t really be important anymore. Cannot quite say the same about Nara though, so prepare thyselves 😀

Kookoo, which one : cuddles or kisses?

Oh, he’s the kisses guy. OC is the one who does cuddles and would be more than alright spending her entire day, or the rest of her life, in his arms. But he’s the kissy kinda guy, because they waited quite a bit for this, and now he’d be damned if he ever let her breathe again. Also, I do think he’s a very physical touch kinda person; he loves hugging and touching her in general. She is also a very physical, but she’s more into cuddling, and he just he likes kissing her. A lot, a lot.

By Alyssa/@wintrbears

What is your plot-planning process? Do you make a formal outline of the whole story/every chapter, etc. Do you outline it in your head only but know what will happen from beginning to end? or do you start with a general idea and create the plot as you write?

Both, I’d say! I usually have a general plot in my head, but not the details. So for example: I knew I wanted the pregnancy scare and the confession to happen in chapter 11, in Translucent, but I hadn't planned the dialogues yet. Or that his mom would come over. Orrrr, the scene with them chilling under the stars he glued to the ceiling or the projection of the Mikrokosmos lamp. Which only happened because I was rereading Layers and it mentioned the lamp, and I was like, “Riiiight, that still exists! I need to give it some importance!”

So these details come to me as I write. Or at least, when I'm doing the outline. It just flows out of me as if they’re real, like I'm not even kidding, the story writes itself. The characters are alive! Sometimes I reread my outlines a couple days later and I’m like, “Damn, he did not say that. I did not make them say that!”

And then I blush and giggle and internally panic just like OC does. 

So yeah basically, I have an idea of what I want to do, and then when I start outlining, the scenes come to me automatically. I usually do know the beginning and ending of a chapter beforehand, though. So yeah, as I said I'm aware of what the general plot will be. A lot of the scenes you guys love and cherish and hold close to your hearts as favourites… were some I hadn’t planned until I started forming words in the document.

how did you first think of the plot/idea for CMI? what initially inspired and now inspires you to write it?

Hah… Funny story, so what inspired me to write it was that one VCR from their MOTS: One concert. Do you guys still remember that one? Where he’s sitting in that white suit and smearing that pitch black colour over his mouth and smirking through it for no reason at all. And Tae was doing something similar and… yeah, they scarred and fucked me up for life. And I wanted to write… Well, first I was going to go for a smut drabble series. And then it turned into a fic that needed to include a body painting scene? Which we eventually got in CMI5, The Canvas. OC does the colour smearing, too!

Then I kinda started building a plot around it and wondered what could lead to such a smut thing at all. So at some point I was like… okay. Arts student jk, business student OC. They need to fall in love, but will have to fight a lot of hurdles and misunderstandings, and there will be a body painting scene at some point and a drunk scene in which JK picks her up from a club, in whichever context. Stuff like that.

Back in 2021, I didn’t even have a title for the series and – fun fact, I was going to call it Love Won’t Let Me Leave, per a friend’s suggestion (@incorrectlyspn mwah <3). But then I realised that it was a bit long and another friend (@agustdakasuga mwah pt2 <3) suggested including a reference to colours? And then I thought of Colour Me In and was like, yep. That’s the one.

Okay, you got more than you asked for, I apologise, I just always love talking about them :D

How do you decide what type of personality OC will have? does it depend on the type of plot you want to write or does the character’s personality guide the plot?

Once again, love the question, because I appreciate people talking and asking about the OC. Most of us read fics for the boys, but it’s very cool to stay for the other characters, such as OC, too! It does something to my heart.

So… again, both! OC was always going to be soft and fun; a lil scarred but still optimistic and someone who loves deeply. I kinda got away from that personality once she and JK broke up and all that stuff with her mother happened.

‘Cause obviously, it was quite a burden to bear and she was sad for a while. But now that things are looking up, I'm hoping to get back to who she truly is, and I think… or I hope, it’ll make you guys love her a lot, too.

Also, looking at their relationship and their bickering, I think that bit also contributed to how I see and describe OC. Like, they’re a wild but also a very gentle couple, and the joy that they find in each other kinda shapes their personalities, too. Does that make sense? It makes sense in my head haha.

I think they’re more hopeful and more open and more tender now. They’ve learned what love really is. A lot of my OCs were or are sad though, but I want to explore more personality types, despite all that sorrow. Like… I don’t just want them to be sad, because she’s not generally a sad person. You saw that in Blooming. If she gets the chance to be happy, she is happy!

Same with Entertainer — the OC is sad, but I want her to be more than that. Mysterious and so on. And yeah, same with my CMI sweetheart.

AND fun side question: do you have a name for OC in your head besides “Y/N.” I have been conditioned to say my name when I see “Y/N” so i’m wondering if you say Rid while reading it or if you think of another name or no name at all. Do you ever picture yourself as your OCs since it’s technically reader x Jungkook.

No, I never read it as Y/N, and frankly, I stopped using that term a loooong time ago. Now I just say, “He calls your name, he whispers your name” etc. Like if you ever read my stuff, you’ll notice that I don’t use Y/N, or anything.

But I don't replace it with my name either. I know we’re supposed to put ourselves in the lead’s shoes, but I can't help but see her as her own person. She’s so separated from me, she’s like a friend to me. There are moments where I imagine standing there with him, or talking to him. But in general, she’s her own person, and in my head, I call her… OC, tbh. It’s her name now, yup.

not specifically CMI related but of all your OCs who do you think is the most like you? if any at all. Do you ever intentionally put pieces of your own personality into your OCs and/or is there one personality trait you always put in your OCs whether intentional or not. 

My first thought was… Right Amount of Wrongs and The Diary of a Healing Heart, since they’re kinda based on my own experiences? But then again, we’re talking about experiences here, not about the character itself. If we’re talking personality wise… I'd say Swan from Songs About You. It’s one of my earlier fics from 2021, that I am very fond of. I’ve even heard a couple times that the OC reminds people of me. So I’d pick her. She’s also kind but also a lil fragile and sensitive, but also so strong? Which… thinking about it now, sounds like a brag, okay I know, but. She’s very dear to me, and I identify with her a lot.

The traits I put in my OCs are often… my family issues :’D Like, a lot of them struggled as they grew up, and I had a hard time with my family growing up, too. I love them, of course, and everything’s fine now, but yeah, there are some issues that they fight through that aren’t too unfamiliar to me, unfortunately. As you could tell. Maybe.

I also make them say stuff sometimes that I'd say in a specific situation, or I add a convo I actually had with someone before or witnessed, at least. I don’t know, actually. You guys know me a little? Lol, what do you think? Is there anything you see in my OCs that matches my personality? Actually, very curious to know!

and then fun side question: which of the members of bts do you think you would actually work out with if you tried to date. do you think you and your bias/biases would be good together or is it another member/members you could see yourself with.

I mean, of course I’d choose my bias. JK is like… I'd sell my soul to give him all my love and be loved by him, because I feel like he’d be good at it. Tae is my bias too, but I don't necessarily see myself dating him. Like, of course I would also die to marry that man, but I do think we can be very different. And I feel like JK and I are just a bit more alike when it comes to a couple things.

But aside from my biases? I’d absolutely choose Namjoon.

He might even be my first choice. He’s the comfort I seek in people. He’s poetry on two legs. I feel like he could provide the warmth a lover craves, and truly understand what it means to be patient, loving and honest, too. And he’d know when to trust his heart and when to trust his mind. So yeah. Very much in love with him and the idea of being with him.

Also, you didn’t ask for it, but I do want to say, that with Yoongi – I don’t know if I could date him, but I would very much like to be his best friend in real life. I was just talking about it to a friend today, because I was recommending D-Day to them, and I spoke about how much I relate to this man.

Whenever he talks, it’s like, he’s talking about what I’m feeling or struggling with as well. You guys remember the D-Day documentary, and the ending made me sob. The thing he said about not worrying about the future and past and living in the present time… I know we’ve heard this lecture a hundred times, but the way he phrased it was so… ugh. It got to me, and I still cry when I see gifs of it or rewatch that clip.

By Anon

I found CMI when it had 3 or 4 chapters so I wasn’t here when it began and missed the early asks! Im curious to know what inspired you to write cmi? What was your original intention in terms of the plot (as maybe somethings changed), the length of the story, the characters? Was it JK fic from the very beginning? If you could share your favourite chapter or specific scene, what would it be? My fave so far is defo the pregnancy scare cause im such a softie for caring kook!

So yeah, the intention was to make it a drabble thing. Once I had a proper plot and understood that it wouldn’t just end up consisting of drabbles, I knew it’d get pretty long. I just never thought we’d ever surpass 300k words? Can you believe that? I didn’t think it could have 20-ish chapters either. I was thinking, I don’t like, like 10 or so? But a lot of things have happened and I can't let them go just yet, so… here we are.

The characters! Yes! I was always gonna include the whole gang, and I knew I wanted everyone to play a role in their lives. So we have Yoongi, Tae, Jimin as part of their squad, pretty consistent members of the story. And then there’s Joon as his mentor and boss. Jin as OC’s new co-worker. Hobi as her “ex”, and so on. And yeah, it was JK from the beginning!

I’d also say the pregnancy scare is my favourite so far, but also. To tell you a secret… my actual favourite scenes are yet to come, pun totally intended. So sit tight. I really hope you like them, too! I’ve been planning the upcoming chapters for a bit, so I hope you love them as much as I do <3

By Ari/@wintaerbaer

You totally don't have to answer this if you're not comfortable, but I've always been super curious as to how you go about outlining your ~spicy~ scenes. Is it the same as normal scenes? I'm always so impressed by how yours never get stale and manage to give us something about the characters (especially for cmi), and as someone who's starting to delve into that aspect of writing, I'd love to hear your thoughts on it!

I’ve told you many times before, but I appreciate it so much that you appreciate the smut scenes, because it’s what I struggle with the most. Like legit, my smut scenes are the last I tackle… It's just very hard to be original and creative with every chapter. It’s not easy for me, so it’s cool you think so.

As to my answer, yeah, I do outline them in bullet point format. It’s an interesting process that I go into with furrowed eyebrows and absolute concentration. Even while writing it, there’s not that much room to be horny, because I'm so focused on phrasing everything well. Different story when I actually edit and reread, but yeah, I swear I do put a lot of effort into these, and TMI, but I also try to include stuff I like or experienced or would like.

Recently, I've also started putting a lot of dialogue in my smut scenes, and I found that it’s a lot of fun, honestly! I’ve learned to let the characters talk more. Because then I'm not stuck on describing every detail, but have them talk about it, too. In some way, at least. The dialogue does help a lot, really. I mean, I don’t know if i succeed, but I try to make the things they say sound natural. I think having them talk and whisper a lot and just be very vocal and interactive helps make the smut less boring. I'm not sure if that helped, but please hit me up if it didn’t!!

By Anon

I would love to know jungkook’s thoughts when he decided to get the forget me not tattoo and during the tattoo session too like did he get anxious about it? did he love oc back then? did he hesitate to get the tattoo?

Super cool question, something I had to think about for a moment!

He was so anxious about it! He doesn’t get nervous about tattoos, since he’s got so many of them. But you know? He wasn’t anxious because he was fearing he was making a mistake, but more ‘cause… he kept wondering what she’d think of it. Like, would it be cringe if he came back with a tattoo that was basically her? Too much? Would she not like that he got it? Or maybe, if she didn’t feel the way he did… would it be extra embarrassing?

But the thing with JK is that, while OC was always very unsure about how he felt about her, he kinda had a hunch about what she might think of him. He saw it in her jealousy about Nara, and how she looked at him in general. He could hide that a bit easier, especially when he spoke about them just being friends. But she was like… even on the phone calls and when they were videocalling in Lights, she was so sad and crying and he was like, “What’s wrong?”

And she said something like, “Please come back.”

Because she needed him with her, and he noticed that craving. So he was a bit more confident. He didn’t love her then but he was falling. And he was falling hard enough to know she’d leave a mark. No matter what was going to happen, he knew she’d affect him long term. In the worst case, it’d be a pretty flower tattoo — Jungkook loves flowers and he adored the way she drew those forget me nots. That helped make him less hesitant. And the fact that he couldn’t stop thinking of her.

Also, they’d become good friends and were getting closer, and he knew that with time, he would eventually fall in love with her. Like, that was very obvious to him, and very… Inevitable? Like, man is seriously obsessed with her.

So to summarise. He didn’t love her yet, but he was in that mess deep enough to know he’d remember her, with or without a tattoo. Other than that, it was also a bit of a souvenir, like a gift for her, too. He wanted to make her happy, and in some way… he wanted to make her fall for him a bit more, too.

By Ivi/@btscontentenjoyer

Okaaaay I have a few because I always love hearing you talk about anything <3 What's a fun moment from the cmi couple's earlier days that we haven't seen and you would like to share, either now or in an additional part one day?

So there’s something I’ve been thinking about… you know how I said I'd be doing drabbles once the main story is over? I want to explore more of their past but a lot of their future, too.

And one of the past scenes is like… OC has a pretty bad day in, like, spring, around March or April which is when it usually gets warmer, too. Jungkook already knows her home life isn’t the best, but he doesn’t ask, because he figures she doesn’t want to talk about it, she never does.

But like, they’re hanging out and he sees her pouting and all. So he suggests going to an amusement park that opened near the centre of the town, and at first, she’s reluctant about it, but he manages to convince her. They do all that couple-y yet platonic stuff, like, trying to win a plushie for the other (which does not work out, but they have fun trying! But JK says something like, “I really had the intention to win this for you today, to make you less sad”, and she’s like, “Okay, but I already feel so much better!” Still giggling and kicking her feet inside).

Then, they go on one of those small ferris wheels thingies? What are they called? Like in The Notebook? And they talk about that Notebook scene as well, where Noah is hanging off the wheel to impress Allie and make her go out with him, and OC is like, “God, as much as I love that movie and his romantic ass… that was such a stupid thing to do!”

And JK was like, “That’s a bummer.” And she’s like, “Why?”

Already clutching his arm in case he does something dumb. And JK, as reckless as he is, goes, “I was gonna climb up there and cheer you up and convince you to admit that I was the better student in business class.”

Of course he wouldn’t have, but she panics and he acts as though he’s about to get up and teases her, and they spent the rest of the ride bickering and laughing. It’s just extremely wholesome, ‘cause OC catches herself not wanting to go home near the end, and she says bye to him very, very hesitantly.

And I think I should stop talking about this, because I feel like I might tear up? Yeah. But I can assure you that there’s… so much I've planned if things go as I intend them to. There’s a lot ahead and we will see a lot more of their past days and everything they’ll be up to after their story is finished.

What's an unnecessary detail or fun fact that you know about a character from cmi but has no relevance to the plot (for example how jungkook likes his coffee or what flavour ice cream is OC's favourite lol)?

UGH, THERE ARE SO MANYYYY!!

You will see a shit ton of those in CMI12 and 13, since these are the perfect chapters to mention these details, but a couple I can tell you are that these two occupy barely one third of the bed. They cuddle into each other; OC generally doesn’t take up much of her bed, didn’t do it in her old home either, because she curls up into a ball. It’s very cute and he loves that a lot, too!

Hm. More fun facts.

Like, the coffee one. JK is a frappuccino kinda guy. OC’s favourite ice cream flavours areeeee… hazelnut, chocolate chip and matcha. She doesn’t go to the zoo often because cute animals make her cry. Also, she believes they do not belong there unless it’s the only chance for their survival. Also enjoys mugs and cups and has filled a cabinet in their kitchen with them. She usually just uses them for tea, of which mint is her favourite, which… she once mentioned to Namjoon and he very much disapproved.

Also… a very small spoiler for the next part — but she can play the guitar a little, aside from the piano, as we saw in one of the earlier chapters. Her dad taught her both of them. She loves DIY projects, but didn’t get a chance or time to try a lot. She wants to, now that she lives with him and isn’t pressured by her parents anymore.

Jungkook on the other hand… his hobbies are different, but he’s just as passionate about them. He likes coffee rather than tea, likes planting his own flowers every now and then, which he learnt back at home, while he discovered that OC does not have a green thumb. She loves getting plants but he takes care of them, because she's killed a few before :’)

He does random karaoke nights, too, and when she’s not too tired, she joins without him even asking. Get you someone who loves you like that! She’s learned that he’s not just a good but excellent singer, and it’s become a habit to ask him to sing her to sleep every now and then. Isabella’s Theme from The Promised Neverland!! Which!! You should totally listen to and that’s totally not because I just watched it, nope nope. Okay but. That’s a lot… you’ll see so much more ahead and I'm so excited.

What past and future 👀👀👀 scene has been the most fun for you to write? Which ones have been the most challenging?

I looooved writing the entire cooking and house tour scene in Blooming. And the pregnancy scare. Andddd the videocalls in Lights. Future scenes… Oh, I see you’re sneaky. Won’t spoil too much, you’ll see, but I wanna say.

Wedding. Mountains. Playing games in teams… and… oh God.

A dancing scene in a much later chapter.

You’ll know when you read it, but it’s one that made me cry the moment I came up with him because the chapter in general will be pretty heavy, and this scene’s gonna involve– quite a few tears. I want to say so much, but I won't. Won’t do a Kim Namjoon and will not spoil! Also the ones I think will be fun but also emotional to write… the last chapter and the last scene.

The one I found extremely challenging was Blue. It explored a lot of grief and past sorrow, and… it was just a lot? And then same with Letters From The Heart. On one hand, because I wrote a chapter fully from his pov for the first time, but also because it was soooo sad, man, what’s wrong with me. Yeah, it was not easy. I wasn’t sure if it was going to be good at all, or would it be boring? But I’m glad you guys loved it so much.

And for some reason, Blooming was hella hard, too. I really don't know why. Which is why I'm so sad it wasn’t as well read as the other chapters, but that’s okay because I really loved it so much. Fingers crossed everyone enjoys Palette!

What is something you learned through the process of writing the series/ through the characters etc.?

Ah okay, try not to cry. If we’re talking writing, I'd say, I've learned that writing a series and keeping it interesting isn’t easy. Even now, I get so nervous. Posting each chapter is nerve wracking, and it never gets any less daunting. But I've learned that there’s so much you can do with a series. You can explore their personalities, their story; you learn how to love and cherish them and make them part of yourself.

And that’s what they are.

They’re such a big part of him, they’re literally tattooed on my skin. And the fact that they affected so many of you, too is— unbelievable. Like. The fact that some of you find joy and comfort in them, and come back to them when you’re sad. That you love them and me and their story so much. I’ve learned that not only are they able to spread warmth in me but in my readers, too?

I treat them as real people now. Dialogues make me cry, thinking about what’s still going to happen makes me emotional and realising that one day their journey with me will end is just. It’s unbelievable. I don’t want it to. By writing about their relationship, I've started yearning for the same level of affection. I want someone to love me like that, and I want to feel as safe as they do.

And by writing JK’s and her characters the way I have been, I've learned how to be kinder, too. They don’t get angry so easily and they learn to accept other people’s flaws and be gentle and loving and sweet, and… yeah, I guess it makes me wanna be better, too. It makes me wanna be brave and more open, less sad.

It’s crazy to think that my own characters can make me feel that way, but I truly have learned a lot. That love can exist, and that hope is important. I’ve always been someone who holds onto hope so much, my entire foundation is built on hope, no matter what happens. And these two show me that it can be worth it to be hopeful. CMI12 especially, or at least its outline, shows me that it’s so, so important to keep going, because there are beautiful things ahead, and I want them all. Want to be here to experience them.

There’s so much more i've learned, but I feel like thinking about it for too long will have me sobbing in no time lol

By Lidia/@baalkoo

do oc or jk have one specific way of showing the other love? like a little touch while eating, letting the other brush their fingers through their hair..

Yeah! He plays with her hair a lot, like he did when his mom came to visit in Translucent, and she’d be talking to OC, and he was touching her hair and curling it around his finger and all.

He also likes her cheeks a lot, and brushing them. Thumb across her cheek, signature move! Like, especially when they’re in bed and talking, he does that sometimes. And he rubs her back whenever she’s stressed. He does it automatically, touching her back or shoulders or cheering her up is something he noticed she likes a lot. With made up secrets like, “Did you know fish throw up, too?” 😀

They also both also love preparing breakfast for the other when they wake up first. So usually, there’s something on the table when the other gets up, unless they wake up at the same time. And OC is a music enthusiast who loves showing him new songs; he’s the one who sings it. She creates playlists for him and names them in kinda weird, kinda endearing ways. One of her playlists are called, “to colour in outlines” — which I think is very cute and a bit of a reference to the sketch book she got him back in Blurred.

By Nat/@cinnamon-roll-peter

I was wondering what inspired you to start writing cmi? if you've already answered that question, what inspires you to write oc and jungkooks relationship the way that you have? have you already planned out what path the story will take until the end? (i never want cmi to end i love it too much 😭)

Already had the first question, but moving to the others — have you seen Brooklyn 99? Because it’s been my latest obsession! But Jake and Amy in it? I love their relationship so much. They’re so supportive, so unproblematic. They do fight and have their differences, but they always find back to each other. And even though CMI has been going far longer than my B99 rewatch, I’ve learned that that’s the relationship I crave and the relationship I want to describe. I always want them to supportive and find home and comfort in each other, too. So watching B99 kinda gave me that extra inspiration lately.

Is that stupid? I don’t know? I’ve been watching love stories lately, like this and Elemental and I want people to love like that all the time.

About the ending — yes, I have! Which makes me sad, because it makes me realise that there’ll be an end to this. But yeah, I know what’ll be happening in the next parts until the very end, and I'm telling you guys, there’s… so much hurt ahead. And so much joy. So much success and failure and missing and yearning and anger. And just. Everything. There’s everything, and seriously, I'm not kidding, so much more than in the first half of the story. Which is why I really hope everyone’s still there when I post the next chapters, because I feel like the first half is nothing compared to what’s still going to happen.

By 🐼✒️ Anon

OC and JK, when did you first know you were head over heels for the other?

OC knew when she saw the tattoo. The distance did help, but the tattoo kinda sealed the deal for her, like she knew… fuck, Im screwed now. There’s no going back to how things were before he went on vacation.

And with him, it was when he got the tattoo, I’d say. Although, I’d say the moment he truly knew how there was no escaping her anymore was when she walked away that night in the dark alley with a simple, “Okay.”

Fun fact! That was a very spontaneous thing to do, it wasn’t in my Monochrome outline. It was a very simple thing, and I didn’t know so many would freak out about it. But I loved the reactions! Loved seeing the messages about people crying about that simple, “Okay.” And I think it affected him just as much.

He panicked and was like, “Fuck, I do not want to lose her.”

But it was his doing, so he just. Watched her walk away.

OC, how was your relationship with your parents while growing up? Did you feel supported and loved enough from them? How did that affect your self esteem, and relationships with other people?

There’ll be more info on that as we move on, but… it wasn’t always bad. There were good moments when she was a child, but things got worse the older she got and the more they noticed she was approaching an age where she’d be able to inherit the company. So, her teenage years were difficult.

They neglected her feelings a lot, and mostly focused on training her. She lost some of the joys of being a teen, so that’s where things got… bad. Before that, she was their little girl and it wasn’t as bad. But more on that later, because her story with her parents isn’t over yet.

Her relationship with them was like. They supported her, but in a wrong way. Her studies, and wanting her to build a career at their company. They thought that was them supporting her. But she’s always wanted to be a writer which didn’t get any acknowledgement. She wishes they gave that more attention, too. Other than that, as she said in Blooming, she wishes her father would’ve stood by her side more. To defend her, to love her. Etc.

So, her self esteem was definitely affected by that, and her relationship with others… like, she’s a bubbly and open girl, but she does get insecure sometimes. It took her so long to understand that JK felt the way he felt about her. Or that she was worthy of love, and that someone actually wanting to be with her was real and not something that’d end in doom.

She was scared because he left her once already, and she still sometimes fears he’ll do it again. So that’s definitely an effect of feeling alone as she grew up. But let’s hope he’s able to eliminate all those thoughts moving forward and loves her well enough to show her she’s more than worth the affection she gets.

OC and JK, how is it like living with each other? Do you ever annoy each other (or are yall still loveydovey in honeymoon phase)?

It’s challenging, but it’s also lovely. I guess the challenging bit comes from them annoying each other, because there are quite a few things that rile them up sometimes. You might remember from Seven, but they both have little quirks, like him constantly smacking his lips or not cleaning up his working space after drawing and painting. Or her not gathering her documents after working at the desk etc. There’s stuff they need to adjust to and get used to, but it’s also things they’re able to talk about most of the time. Like, they don’t fight about them and converse and talk them out. The more time passes, the more they’ll get used to each other. They will fight, but that’s normal, I guess!

But since they’ve just moved in together, most of the time, they’re still basking in that honeymoon glow.

OC and JK, tips for hopeless romantics out there who have never had any romantic/sexual experiences?

So first of all, they’re giving you a hug. They want to tell you to be patient. We find love when we don’t seek it. There’s a soulmate out there for all of us, and they’re looking for you just the way you’re looking for them because they want to be loved just the way you want to, too. Vibe with your life until they cross it. You’re someone who deserves to be loved and adored and worshipped, so please know you won’t be disappointed. And then, with romance comes sexual experience.

It might take some time, but it’s important to know that you shouldn’t settle for less than you desire and for less than you deserve; but it’ll come to you. Just be yourself and be patient and things will be oaky! <3

Rid, what inspired you to write this story? Do you relate to it on a personal level? What helps/facilitates the writing process for you?

What inspired me was just that VCR from their MOTS: One concert, but. I stuck with it because of the love and comfort it radiates, even for me. There are so many aspects of it that I relate to on a personal level — like, the slight trauma she carries from growing up with a strict family. Or being scared of being left alone. The fear of loneliness and hurt… I'm someone who gets very nervy when it comes to love and stuff, and I'm always, always so scared of everyone leaving, be it in real life or virtually?

I crave love the way these two crave love, because I love loving, and I want to know what it feels to be loved just the same way, too. So yeah. Uhm. I don’t know, that got very sentimental very fast, but. That’s what it is!

Every other thing, like the story and stuff that happens in general comes from their own story. Even though there will be a bit more ahead that comes from personal experience, but most of them is their own thing.

What helps me facilitate the writing process is just. Knowing how much I love them. And the excitement of moving towards some amazing chapters. Also the fact that the story means as much to some people as it does to me. The fact that some wait for it or feel comforted by it. Or that it makes their day or helps them get through their days. It’s just very exciting and rewarding.

Rid, what is the first piece you've ever written? How long have you been writing, and what's your first inspiration? (i used to write when i was in middle school but stopped along the way, and ive thought about slowly picking it up again :") do you have any tips?)

I would just advise you to start! Make an outline or whatever helps you get started. Maybe a character sheet, the story in a couple bullet points that you can expand on. But the most important advise I like to give is to just get started. I also only read back in late 2020 and a friend then suggested to write and post the story I was planning back then. Didn’t know where it’d get me, but here we are. If you’d like to see more advise, you can also browse through my tag “writing tips”. I don’t know if it’s helpful at all, but maybe you can read through them!

The first fic I ever wrote for Tumblr was The Diary of a Healing Heart, which I've now revamped and reposted. But if we’re talking in general? It was a book I wrote with 2 friends called ‘The Camp’. Some fantasy/time travel/romance thing? I would never publish it though because I was 14 back then, and I alsoooo wrote it in another language. I got very inspired by the books I read, especially romance stories and stuff, but oh my God. Would never reread or I’d die.

thank you so much if you read this <3 sending much love to all who participated and everyone in general!! all support is appreciated. if you want, come and talk to me or say whatever's on your mind! love you <3

colour me in – commentary | jjk (m)

⋙ pairing: Jungkook x reader ⋙ rating: 18+ ⋙ content and warnings: mention of toxic relationships (parents), mention of cmi spoilers, heartbreak, love, difficult childhood, mention of smut, teeny tiny spoilers, talk about future and past chapters, future and past scenarios, additional info on the characters and the story, plot background, general behind the scenes, thought and writing process. so many pauses and stuttering im sorry lol 😭 sorry for mispronounced words!! also i'm sick, so pls bear with my potentially confused mind ajsfhjas <3 ⋙ length: 73 minutes ⋙ a/n: that was ☠️ so much fun but my voice is gone lol. i hope the stuff i said make sense and that you enjoy me rambling!! even if you just listen to parts of this, i'm eternally grateful!! and let me know what you think, too? would loveee to know what you think of my thoughts lol 🥺 if you've more questions, drop by anytime!! ily <3

⋙ part of the colour me in series ⋙ listen to the commentary here!

© 2024 taegularities. all rights reserved.

[outerrangesource]

‘Outer Range’ Star Imogen Poots on the Big Finale Twists and Her Hopes for Season 2

How did you initially get involved with “Outer Range?”

I was sent the pilot script the summer before we ended up shooting. And I just thought it was really cool and made an audition tape. I think my boyfriend spent 2/3rds of a day helping me do it. And then I was like, No, it’s not good enough. I threw it away and then did it again. That’s how it started. And I spoke with Brian and Zev, the people who created the show, and learned about the other cast members who were coming on board and yeah, that’s the way it began.

When you talked to Brian, how much did he tell you about Autumn? How much of that backstory was there from the beginning?

The large reveal and the final episode, I knew about. They told me that about three days before we started filming. They had like a year, but they told me three days before. Which is I think is a good thing because it actually meant I was sitting with a real person rather than a twist.

I didn’t know a hell of a lot. As the scripts came in, I learned more. And that’s one of the difficulties of television is you don’t have the full picture initially, like you do with film and theater where you can… You know what you’ve ordered with a three-course meal, whereas this is surprising. But what that does is it keeps you incredibly present because each scene and each episode is its own microcosm. And you have to be ready to engage. I really enjoyed that challenge. I was very aligned with her quest to also find out more, I suppose.

And what is your understanding of her quest?

Well, I was aware that she had a poverty of knowledge. And she was looking to certain writers like Simone Weil, who was mentioned in the script. She was adopting other people’s modes of thinking. And obviously in, I think it’s 7 or 8, she repeats that mantra from “Dune.” She’s someone who, by the end of the season, I understood was far down the rabbit hole of that fixation on maybe this notion of the American hero and that you could become invincible. But her quest, it felt initially familial. It felt like she was trying to figure out who she was, like many of us do, her ancestral roots and stuff, but quickly combining that with a sense of place and home. We would call it nostalgia, but I think for her, it was like gold. It was like a toxic lacerating quest to find out the truth. Because I knew she was Amy, I understood she would’ve been in and out of that hole. I knew that her relationship with death would be perhaps quite casual. Whereas if we think about all of us, death is the only certainty. It’s the cutoff point. What does a life without that threat do to your relationships with other people?

You have so much ground to cover too, in terms of her taking this medication for bipolar disorder and has these messianic tendencies. What was the hardest thing to wrap your head around in terms of your portrayal of Autumn, and how did you do it?

I think the stuff I found hardest was at the beginning of the show. I’d been told by a couple folks when we started filming, people were really worried about the character of Autumn and quite panicked by her as a figure in the show. And I couldn’t wait to get going. I felt like the challenging stuff for me was earlier on when she hadn’t yet subverted or I hadn’t yet been able to subvert that curious wide-eyed omnipresent nymph-esque character.

And I think in a good way, in a way that was useful for the character was often felt not held back, but bound by something else. And it was fun to get that release. That’ve been something which everyone was really encouraging about. That I’m aware that a lot of people have disliked her as a character. And I think that’s quite fun. Maybe it’s more predictable to want to like that kind of a character and what she represents. It was fun to get to do the thing that a lot of actors get to do, but a lot of actresses don’t, so that was fun.

When we see Autumn in the future she is clearly a cult leader of some kind and by the end of the first season she seems to be well on her way. Did you ask Brian to fill in those gaps?

Yeah, I was, I’d say it was like an ongoing conversation. But the truth is, it’s not so difficult to pick up a newspaper and find a less extreme version of this character.

You think about the notion of wanting to be president, what does that say about a person? There’s something, the ingredients, what if those ingredients fall into the wrong body as we’ve seen evidence of in history. And I think there’s something that was fun to piece together and deeply sad about someone who feels that poverty of identity that they had to embody other thinkers or lean on, even that mantra from “Dune,” that sort of that sense that you can be a superhero. There’s something sort of very insidious about that, I think.

But Brian would tell me about the backstory a bit. And it was quite freeing. It was quite freeing not to know too much, I think. And I could come up with my own reasoning behind certain things because she’s alone and there’s no one to challenge her points of view. That’s how I felt about her. What happens to a person who’s left alone, who’s got really gotten deep in and can fall victim to a cult and can encourage others to do the same?

It’s almost like playing two different characters too, because future Autumn is a completely different person than the person that walks onto the ranch. What was that like?

Yeah, that was cool. I think that needed to happen because I remember them coming towards me with like a makeup brush and I was like, “No, not this character.” But then I was like, “Okay, it’s the future, it’s fine.” And we had to have that to differentiate between the two. But no, it was interesting. I think she’s got a lot of people inside of her. I don’t think, Autumn well, does Autumn know who she really is? Obviously she really doesn’t because otherwise she wouldn’t be in the show. But there’s something about that. She’s role playing. She’s not a shape shifter exactly but I think it’s easy for her to shed the skin.

Let’s talk about the scene of you psyching yourself up in the bathroom, which seems to be the emergence of Autumn as the potential spiritual leader.

Shooting that was so cool because Larry Trilling, our director who did 7 and 8, he was an invaluable asset for the show because he was the one who sat me down and was like, “I think this is where she gets metaphysical. I think she becomes something else personified at this point.” And that was a really fun, open-ended gift actually to get from a director, very freeing. And also he was someone who was keeping tabs if it went too far, they could bring me back. It’s the perfect temperature of a working relationship.

And that scene was amazing because what we have is a stunt double of my character dressed identically. She was doing the boxing stance with me. We were like mirroring each other and the camera came up behind her and then she stepped out of the way. It was just a very clever way of formulating that shot.

And in terms of the actual mantra, it’s lifted from “Dune.” It was really interesting. I used to be really obsessed with hearing poets read their own work. And Allen Ginsburg, when you hear him recite “Howl” in that monotony and that tone, he barely takes a breath. It just comes out like a train on train tracks. I felt like there was something similar to that. It shouldn’t be a performance. It’s inside her, that rhythm that then sets her up to do what she does, which is takes part in a shootout, I guess.

What was it like shooting that final scene and what is your understanding of Autumn’s place in the family going forward?

Yeah, that well shooting that shootout was really fun and I always get really scared around guns and not confident with them. And we had an incredible crew and weapons handlers, so everything felt incredibly safe and then you can do your work. So that was fun. I just don’t like working with guns, but that was fun despite that. And then getting past sort of being ripped to shreds by Tom Pelphrey, who said that in my onesie I looked like, I think it’s like a character from like an American toilet cleaner or something, or a toothpaste figure. It’s some weird character who wears a red onesie apparently. When I wasn’t being ridiculed, I felt very cool in my red one piece. And it just felt like a different show at that point, felt like we were almost parodying something.

The rest of the show didn’t all feel like that but it felt other in a really interesting way. And then in terms of my feeling about the family, it was very strange. I felt quite uncomfortable with that. When Josh was laying me in the bed, it’s like trying to calm down an incredibly feral dog. I felt like a feral dog who was being told that they could now rest and it didn’t feel right. It felt strange. Kudos to Josh, because he carried me across a vast plain and we were doing it in one shot at like four in the morning. And just before we exited frame, I got the giggles when I was supposed to be passed out, so we had to do it all again. It was a fun ending to a very like intense show.

Should the show return, what do you think is next for Autumn?

I certainly have my own hopes for her as a character and the show. It’s unknown at this point, what happens going forward. There are whispers that it will, but then you don’t know. I think with anything as well, because I’m not used to doing stuff more than once anyway. For me I’m kind of like, oh one and done and we made a show about what would happen if a hole appeared on an American pasture. And that’s enough for me. But I also would love to be back with this bunch of actors and creatives again. I get the impression that of course things that were written in season one and things that took place and were set up to be furthered in a second season. I certainly know things that would potentially happen if we were to go again, but we’ll see if the world wants to know.

[the-dream-team]

What I Would Do 

Read it on AO3

“And if you come anywhere within spitting distance of my friends again, you’ll lose a lot more than your voice, Mulciber .”

Lily Evans stared down the Slytherin whose ability to speak she’d stolen with a well-practiced Silencing Charm. Unable to spit out anymore foul language, Mulciber narrowed his eyes and stormed off towards the dungeons, accepting defeat. She turned to Mary and gave her a small smile. That problem was taken care of. For now, at least.

“Oh, that was marvelous!” came a clear, familiar voice from across the corridor. “Evans, you’re one helluva witch, have I told you that yet today?” Jamie Potter grinned at Lily, one hand clutching her stupid stolen snitch and another combing through her tangle of wild curls. Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew followed close behind her, as they always did. She playfully swatted Sirius’ shoulder and tugged at her shirt collar. “Padfoot, you know I can’t resist a girl who stands up against those bastard Death Eaters-in-training.” Sirius barked out a laugh.

Lily rolled her eyes. “Knock it off, Potter, or you’ll be next on my hit-list.”

Jamie’s grin only broadened. “Evans, you drive me crazy, you know that? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, what I would do if you started flying for the other team…”

As Jamie and her posse sauntered off down the hall, Mary sighed.

“It must be hard for her,” she said softly.

“Hard for who, Potter?” asked Lily in disbelief.

“Yes, Jamie, ” said Mary. “Having those kinds of unrequited feelings seeing as she’s the only girl here who… y’know.”

Lily’s mouth gaped open. “Mary! There are no feelings involved. Potter just can’t let go of an old joke.”

Mary raised her eyebrows. “If you say so.”

Unbelievable. Lily crossed her arms and furrowed her brow the rest of the way to the Library. Unrequited feelings my arse, she thought with a huff. Potter had been acting out the same schtick for years. She loved boasting about her deep, dramatic attraction towards Lily (most often in public places) and calling Lily’s preferences into question. It made her uneasy, and Potter knew it. Jamie liked rileing her up.

Of course, she had to admit it hadn’t started as a joke. Their third year, during a particularly rowdy Herbology lesson, Lily and Jamie got into a row over the Leaping Toadstools they were meant to be picking in the forest. After some bickering over who would be in charge of catching the mushrooms and a bit of shoving back and forth, Lily eventually threatened Jamie with a Bat-Bogey hex if she kept getting in her way.

Before she could stop herself, in front of the entire class, Jamie practically shouted, “Bloody hell, Evans, what I would do if only you were into girls.”

The heat burned so deeply on Lily’s cheeks that day, sometimes she still felt the licks of fire teasing her skin nearly four years later. The panic. The embarrassment. The fear. It all boiled up from her knotted stomach and racing heart, presenting as a disgusted expression that could only be painful for the receiving end.

Jamie’s usually confident smirk had been replaced with a gaping mouth and... were those tears welling in her eyes?

After the initial shock, Lily tried softening her expression, but the damage was done. In an instant, Jamie swiped a hand under her glasses, ran another through her fringe, and put on a forced lopsided grin. “So, er, you’ll keep me updated if anything changes, yeah?”

She let out a laugh, looking for the boys to back her up. They chuckled along with her the best they could while Jamie shrugged to the class and went back to their Toadstools, avoiding Lily’s eye for the rest of the lesson.

A stormcloud of guilt brewed in Lily’s chest the following weeks. Jamie had taken to staying in the boy’s dorm to avoid any kind of contact with her and the other girls. Sirius had stepped up, becoming extra protective of her and sending daggers at anyone who dared to even glance in Jamie’s direction. Lily tried getting her alone to apologize for weeks before eventually cornering her and Remus one day after Defense Against the Dark Arts.

“Potter,” said Lily, breathless as she chased her down the hallway, “please, I wanted to talk to you.”

Jamie spun around with a dazzling smile. “Evans! Coming to tell me you’ve finally changed your mind?”

The flirtatious wink sent Lily over the edge, her planned speech quickly abandoned. “Oh, you’re impossible!”

“Don’t worry, love,” Jamie casually laughed, “take your time, I can wait.”

Completely speechless and beyond flustered, Lily had no choice but to storm away. She was thirteen and emotional, and years away from controlling the way her feelings manifested themselves. So for the following weeks (and then years) as Jamie kept up the teasing, Lily responded emphatically with thunderous huffs and exaggerated scoffs.

By seventh year, their routine became so practiced, Lily barely noticed her heart skip anymore when Jamie shot off her endless string of compliments. Barely flinched when Potter suggested there could be a question of Lily’s tastes.

There weren’t any questions.

She didn’t fancy girls.

Had there been close calls through the years? Sure.

On a warm spring day down by the lake, when Dorcas placed an innocent hand on Lily’s thigh while laughing at a dumb joke, had Lily’s stomach somersaulted in a not-totally-unpleasant way? Yes. Had she spent the next few months secretly hoping it would happen again? Possibly.

Had there been times where Lily caught her eyes wandering to the hems of skirts or lingering on Jamie’s impossibly long eyelashes, only magnified by those stupid, round wire-rimmed lenses? It didn’t matter.

Those moments weren’t real. They never formed as full sentences in her head, mentally blocked before they took shape. The heat on her leg left behind from Dorcas’s touch didn’t mean anything if she didn’t give it a name. Ideas could float untethered around her mind as long as they never met the ground.

The thoughts she had about boys were real. Shared giggles with Mary about Sirius Black’s sharp jawline or Amos Diggory’s playful charm flowed with ease. Her crush on Remus Lupin during their fourth year terrified her to admit out loud, but there had never been a question about whether she was allowed to let her imagination run wild over his floppy sandy hair and pleasant quiet smile. Boys were easy.

The thought of liking girls never would have crossed her mind if Jamie hadn’t said those words to her in Herbology all those years ago. Lily hadn’t even known that was an option before. Perhaps if Jamie had kept her mouth shut, if she hadn’t spent the next four years poking and prodding at Lily’s very secure sexuality, then Lily would never have found herself repeating the whispered phrase in her mind,

Please don’t let me fancy girls. Please, please don’t let me fancy girls.

***

On one unusually warm and breezy day in March, Professor Slughorn called for Lily to stay behind for a moment after Potions. She waved on her friends, promising to meet them at the Great Hall later for lunch, and happily made her way to the front of the classroom.

“Miss Evans!” boomed Slughorn. “I had a favor to ask of you if you’d be up to it.”

“Of course,” she said. The Potions Professor had always been one of her biggest supporters at Hogwarts and she rarely passed up an opportunity to lend a hand.

“You see, I’ve completely run out of Flobberworm Mucus and I’ve got a lesson on Sleeping Draughts for my first years this afternoon.” He checked his watch and shook his head as a group of fourth years started parading into the dungeons. “And as you can see, I’ve got classes back to back until then! My dear, would you mind running down to Pippen’s Apothecary during your lunch break? I can write you a note and let Minerva know you’ll be popping down to Hogsmead for just a moment…”

“I’d be more than happy to,” said Lily, eager to get outside and stretch her legs. The prospect of getting to see the little village outside of the usually scheduled trips thrilled her.  

“Wonderful!” said Slughorn, summoning a piece of parchment and adding his signature in a swooping, elegant script. “A tankard of mucus should do, and of course they know where to bill it to.”

Lily grabbed the note with a grin and spun on her heel to head out the door, practically skipping on her way out.

The moment she stepped outside the castle, her lungs filled with a humid air, fresh from the previous night’s rain. Puddles littered the pathways, serving as an extra reminder to enjoy the sunny weather when it managed to crash through the otherwise constant cover of clouds. With a squeal of excitement, Lily shrugged off her robes and rolled up her sleeves, letting the warm breeze wash over her skin and whip through her hair.

A rare taste of independence played on Lily’s lips, curling up the corners into a wide smile. She held onto the precious moment alone, briskly walking towards the village as she imagined what life outside of Hogwarts had in store for her. Adulthood approached as quickly as the little shops and bustling pathways of Hogsmeade Village, and soon she reached her destination.

Faint, tinkling bells announced Lily’s arrival as she stepped through the front door of Pippen’s Apothecary. Sunlight poured through the large front windows, soaking the rows of shelves with a golden glow. Bundles of herbs, jars of multi-colored liquids, and barrels of crystals lined the shop’s walls and overflowed into its hallways. And towards the front of the store, a knobly old man in a well-worn cloak stroked a mewing black cat with round, yellow eyes.

“Welcome to Pippens,” he smiled. “It’s not a Hogwarts weekend, is it?”

Lily ignored the disappointed pang of being recognized as a student and approached the front counter. “No, sir, it’s a tuesday,” she said. “I’ve just been sent by Professor Slughorn to pick up a tankard of Flobberworm Mucus.”

“Ah, of course,” said the man, squinting down at Lily’s note. “Old Horace runs through that mucus faster than a unicorn during a solar eclipse.”

She let the unfamiliar metaphor fall to the side with a chuckle and watched the shopkeeper shuffle back into his storage closet. The cat nudged Lily’s arm with a soft meow, unflinching towards the clanking and bumping sounds of the man pouring a thick liquid into a pint-sized container.

“I’ve put Horace’s invoice in the bag here,” said the man, handing over a canvas tote with the mucus lovingly wrapped up inside. “He knows where to find me!”

Lily thanked him with and grin and gave the cat another scratch behind the ears before turning to leave.

“Now you didn’t hear this from me,” called the man as Lily was halfway out the door, “but Fortescue’s brought his ice cream cart out for the first warm day of the year, and I hear he’s handing out free samples.” He sent a cheery wink in her direction.

“Oh, thank you, sir!” Lily beamed and she waved goodbye.

Ice cream sounded lovely.

The cart wasn’t hard to find, as a small crowd of villagers had lined up to take advantage of Fortescue’s deal. The giddiness of being surrounded by adults in the real world fluttered back as Lily queued with other shopkeeps on their lunch breaks and locals enjoying an afternoon on the streets. When it came her turn to order, she received a generous sample of the mint chocolate chip and a sweet smile from Florean Fortescue himself.

She couldn’t dream up a more perfect afternoon. Lily walked slowly through the streets of Hogsmead, determined to drink in as much of the gorgeous day as possible. The trees, just starting to bud, swayed back and forth rhythmically, and the grass, freshly watered, still smelled like a new morning’s dew. She watched the witches and wizards stroll down the pathways. A short man with a top hat chased after a yappy dog while a large wizard peered down at his comically small pocket watch, and on a bench across the street from where she stood, two witches took turns sharing an ice cream cone.

Lily’s heart skipped a beat as her eyes locked onto the women sitting together on the bench. They looked to be in their late twenties or possibly early thirties. Both wore fashionable cloaks with trendy hairstyles and one of the women was reading a well-loved book in between licks of chocolate ice cream, her feet propped up on the bench, and her shoulder leaning against the other woman. A warmth flooded Lily’s chest as her heartrate quickened watching the pair, shocked by how lovely she found the simple scene.

Lily watched as the reading witch, not taking her eyes from her book, angled her head to ask for another bite of ice cream, but instead of bringing the cone to her lips as she had done before, the other woman surprised her with a quick kiss. The overwhelming flood of emotions burst from Lily’s chest in a gasp.

She wanted what she saw before her. She wanted the lazy afternoon sitting on a bench, curled up with a book and an ice cream cone and a girl to lean against.  

Her mind raced with thoughts crashing to the ground with such force that their echos reverberated through her entire body, making her knees week and hands tremble. Every blurry idea in her head racked into focus, each half formulated sentence allowed itself to be completed with an exclamation point. Lily stared ahead at the bench where the possibilities of her future blew open like a firework spreading across the night sky.

After what felt like ages of watching the two witches, Lily finally peeled her gaze away and forced herself to make her way back to Hogwarts. Every step felt like walking on clouds as she practically floated up the road towards the castle. That is until she came face to face with another girl wearing a school uniform and a stupidly happy grin on her face.

“Potter?”

“Evans?”

Jamie had appeared in front of her out of thin air.

“What are you doing at Hogsmeade?” asked Lily, praying her shaking voice wasn’t too obvious. She hadn’t been prepared to see Jamie while her emotions were this heightened. The pounding of her heart beat into her eardrums and threatened to leap out her throat. Jamie wore her usual crooked smile, so effortless on her soft features, mirrored perfectly in those mischievous hazel eyes.

“I could ask you the same question,” said Jamie, cocking an eyebrow. That feeling of anger Lily associated with Potter and her teasing bubbled up to the surface. But it wasn’t anger she felt. It was fear. A deep fear of how Jamie’s playful jokes made her stomach flutter and her cheeks blush. And now that Lily’s image of herself grew clearer in her mind’s eye with every passing moment, she no longer had the capacity to bottle up and explain away the fear she felt when looking at Jamie Potter, who had always made her feel this way.

Feeling so desperately alive, she had to do something.

“I’m running an errand for Professor Slughorn,” she said calmly, “but I can assume you don’t have an excuse to be outside the castle.”

“Ah, you caught me, Evans,” said Jamie with a chuckle. “Look, I was just popping down to Honeydukes to pick Remus up his favorite chocolate bars. I could’ve taken the tunnel- and I probably should’ve considering our little run-in here- but it’s such a lovely day that I said screw it and walked the path instead.” She shrugged her shoulders, not looking too disappointed about being discovered.

Lily narrowed her eyes and put all of her efforts into provoking Jamie. “Well, maybe I should just say screw it and give you a month's worth of detentions, Potter.”

It worked. Jamie’s eyes widened like saucers and her smirk grew into a proper grin. “Oh, Evans, stop that, you’re making me blush! Merlin, what I would do if you ever switched your fancies.”

Jamie had walked right into her trap. With a deep breath and a pointed stare, trying to convey every feeling exploding through her body, Lily responded, “What would you do?”

Jamie froze, clearly never expecting a reply to the scenario she so often suggested.

Lily ignored the flush spreading across her face and continued. “What would you do if I told you I fancied girls. If I fancied you. ” Her heart thudded so painfully against her chest, she thought she might be sick.

Jamie stood slackjawed, not breaking eye contact, like a deer in headlights. The girl who always had a quick comeback or a smart retort for every situation had been rendered speechless. The painful reality that Jamie’s previous words had no intent of action behind them crashed over Lily like a wave breaking in the middle of an ocean storm. And now the drops of saltwater spilled over, stinging the corners of her eyes.

“Enjoy your time in the village, Potter,” she said softly as she turned away from Jaimie, escaping the nightmare as quickly as possible.

The ground, which had felt weightless only a moment ago, became hard and cruel under her feet as she trudged back up the path to the castle. How could she be so stupid? Why did she allow her bursting adrenalin to make her do something so reckless?

“Evans!” Jamie shouted from behind, but Lily wouldn’t turn around, couldn’t let Potter see the tears welling in her eyes. “Lily, wait!”

A hand clutched Lily’s wrist and tugged back hard, spinning her whole body around in a flash. Two gentle palms grasped the side of her head and cupped her cheek while hazel eyes bore into her own. Jamie Potter’s face was inches from her own, dazed and flustered and looking for a clue.

Lily responded instinctually with the only clue Jamie needed. A laughing smile of uncontainable joy.

Jamie crashed forward, meeting Lily’s lips in an exhilarating kiss that set her nerve endings on fire. Soft and firm, the years of pent up emotion spilled between their mouths and hands and bodies as they drew closer to one another. Lily ran her fingers through Jamie’s wonderful hair and bumped her adorable wire-rimmed glasses with her nose. She never could have known how good this would feel.

When they finally came up for air, Jamie’s face glowed with shock and happiness under the sunlight, her cheeks flushed and eyes unbelieving. Lily couldn’t help but pull her into a tight embrace and commit the feeling of her to memory, never wanting to live in the dark ever again.

“Hey, Jamie?” Lily asked into the girl’s shoulder. “Do you want to go get ice cream with me?”

Jamie tightened the hug, nearly suffocating Lily in the best possible way. “Oh, Evans, what I would do to get ice cream with you.”

[pl-panda]

To Marry a Vigilante: Part 14

MASTERLIST || First || Previous || Next

To Marry a Vigilante: Part 14

---------

“Tt. I will cut that stupid harlot into pieces.” Damian scowled. He, Allegra, Claude, Jon, Felix, Marinette, and Chloé sat at one of the prime tables in the cafeteria. His wife just finished telling them what happened after the initiation meeting.

“Maybe we don’t immediately jump to murder?” Claude suggested.

“I agree. We don’t have a place to hide a body yet.” Chloé supplied. 

“That’s not what… nevermind.” Allegra sighed. 

“Dami! I appreciate the thought, but maybe keep it as plan Z?”

“Plan Z is where I need more than one body bag.” He grumbled but nodded. “But we can postpone it.”

“Okay. Let’s act rationally and focus on prevention. Teachers will be useless.” Felix chose to act as the voice of reason.

“I really hoped it would be different than Paris…” Marinette moaned.

“It is. If they actually catch her, she will be expelled. But you’re not exactly the headmaster’s favorite person while Erica seems to be held high by him. We would need a solid proof and she is cunning.” Claude explained. 

“Remember Lucy Hunt?” Allegra asked. “She did something to attract Erica’s wrath and she had to move to Metropolis after she had a mental breakdown. Nothing was ever proven and to the naked eye it would look like a series of coincidences.”

“So she is smarter than Lila?” The shorter Parisian asked, worried about what was to come.

“Nah. She just knows how to talk with the right people.” Claude dismissed. 

“First order of business would be to ensure she has nothing real to hurt you with.” Felix started. 

Damian and Marinette shared a worried gaze before the boy spoke. “The site is foolproof. Drake made sure to use some of the best technology we have to protect it. Not even a super AI can hack it.” He subtly nodded his head to where Max and Markov ate. Kim and Alix were with them. The skater girl looked really upset. “Same with social media. Short of an alien invasion or if someone physically broke into where we hid the servers, you’re safe on that front.” 

It clearly took a lot of weight from her shoulders. 

“Okay, now onto blackmail?”

“Tt. That’s not something to discuss where we can be overheard.” Damian quickly shut that topic down. 

“Right. Sorry.” Jon rubbed the back of his neck.

“Don’t worry, Kent. I’m covering that front.” Chloé smirked. 

“That’s great…” Claude started, but then pointed toward another table, with quite a lot of people. “Is that Erica… and you said that Sausage Hair was Layla Bossi?”

“Lila Rossi,” Chloé corrected him. “But I like Lie-la Bossi better now.”

“They seem… friendly..” Jon commented when the two girls hugged.

“I would actually expect them to be rivals, given that both want Damian,” Allegra noted. 

“Are they… crying?” Marinette asked.

“Crocodile tears.” Felix glared at them. “They are up to something. I don’t…” He never got to finish, because a purple butterfly descended from the ceiling and landed on Erica’s ring. The corrupted energy surrounded her momentarily and when it died out, her whole appearance was changed.

She now wore a black one-piece cheerleader uniform, similar to what GA cheerleaders wore, except it was black with red lines and not lilac with a white finish. On her chest, there was, in a jagged script, written ‘Gargoyle’. Her face was now in a light shade of red, with tear stains permanently etched on her cheeks. Her eyes were entirely white. Her blonde hair was turned into a messy mane and two horns stood proudly on her forehead. Her lower legs turned into that of a goat, complete with hooves. She was now holding a whip in one hand and a burning pompon in the other. Small wings were folded on her back.

“A succubus! +10 to charisma and +5 to strength!” A small Asian girl shouted from the nearby table.

“I am Weeping Gargoyle!” The Akuma spoke. “I’ve been used by the one I held dear and now I’m going to get what I was denied. But first,” the creature turned to Marinette and her friends. “You! I’m going to deal with you!” 

“Frick frack I lost me…” Claude started some rhymed joke, but a fireball sailing toward them shut him up. 

Thinking quickly, Marinette flipped over the table to use it as an impromptu cover. Damian kicked the ground and a sword popped from next to his chair. Nobody had time to question how he hid it there because everyone scattered. There was nowhere to transform in all the havoc.

“What’s going on here?” Headmaster Hammer walked through the front doors to the cafeteria to see a demonic cheerleader tossing flaming pompons that exploded. “Teenagers.” He growled. From under his cloak, he drew a saber and took a battle stance. “Fiend!” He rushed at her. The whip slashed at him, but the headmaster deflected it with an incredible show of swordsmanship. This created an opening for Damian to charge from the other side. He managed to dodge the flaming ball and slice at her hand. At the last moment, the wing shielded the Akuma and his blade bounced off without leaving the slightest cut. The headmaster was met with the same fate. 

“Stupid men!” The Akuma shouted. A ring of fire exploded from her, pushing and burning both of the attackers. 

“Run.” Headmaster snapped at Damian. “I’ll hold her off.” 

“Tt. You’re old. Get to safety.” The boy snapped back.

“You’re so getting detention for this!” Hammer scowled as the two dodged their separate ways.

“Hey! The tryouts are in the gym!” A voice spoke from a hole in the roof. A spotted heroine leaped from the hole while throwing a yo-yo at the Akuma. The cheerleader shielded with her wings before flapping them and lifting from the ground. 

“You’re not who I want! I’ll get your miraculous later!” She flew through the same hole the heroine entered through. The whole cafeteria was now on fire. Ladybug met Damian’s gaze for a moment before grabbing the headmaster and jumping outside. He was in bad condition from all the smoke. 

She laid him on the ground to make sure he was okay. He coughed several times before the professor was able to speak correctly. “What about the brat!”

“I’m going in now.”

“No need.” Black Cat appeared next to them. “I got him out. We’re lucky the main doors were still working because the rooftop fell apart after I entered.” 

“Cat! The Akuma will be on her ring. It was what created all the fire.”

“Tt. Let’s go.” The two jumped away from the headmaster, who hid a small smile.

-----------

Three girls and two boys snuck around the campus. Most of the students were already evacuated, but they managed to stay undetected and remain in the action area.

“I still think we shouldn’t go after a supervillain.” Kyle tried, but Maps made a gesture that told him to stop speaking.

“Sh! I’m telling you, it was Erica. A butterfly landed on her and she suddenly transformed into that monster.”

“I read about it. It was a demon. The Lord of Butterflies sent it to take her over. If we aren’t careful, it will turn all of us into that monster.”

“Olivia? You’ve got the crossbow?”

“Please. Demon? Lord of Butterflies?” Colton criticized. “Are you sure it wasn’t just some manga?”

“Shut up! How else would you explain what happened to Erica?” Pomeline asked. “It’s obviously dark magic.”

“Okay. Assuming it is dark magic, how are we supposed to protect ourselves? I’m pretty sure I don’t have tinfoil hats on me.”

“Fool. The only thing that can protect you from the Lord of Butterflies are positive emotions.” She spoke like it was an obvious fact, yet still making it sound ominous. 

Abruptly, the wall they were hiding behind exploded, and a girl dressed in a skintight red and black outfit flew past them. A boy in assassin garb followed. He landed on his feet and started to spin a staff fast enough to create a shield. Several fireballs flew at him, but they all smashed into the shield harmlessly. 

He noticed them cowering behind the wall.

“Tt. What are you doing here!? Get away! Now!”

Ladybug jumped up and leaped from behind him, throwing her yoyo. It wrapped over the leg of the villain and pulled the flying Akuma down. Cat charged past his partner and smashed her with his baton like it was a baseball bat, sending her into the wall. 

“Lucky Charm!” The heroine tossed the yo-yo above her head and a red-and-black watermelon fell into her arms. With only a moment’s hesitation, she tossed it to Cat, who already knew what to do. Once more playing baseball, he redirected the watermelon over to the akuma. She just managed to get it together when the fruit landed on her horns and got stuck. The change of weight made her fall, which Ladybug used to dash toward her and tie her with her own whip. She then pulled the ring from her finger and crushed it in her hand. 

A purple butterfly escaped her grasp, which she caught into her yo-yo. 

“Bye Bye little butterfly.” She then grabbed the watermelon and tossed it high in the air. “Miraculous Ladybug!” 

The item exploded into a swarm of glowing bugs that fixed everything there was to fix. It looked like the supervillain never attacked. 

“What… I…” Erica was back to normal and very confused. “There was… I remember…”

“Don’t worry. The paramedics will be with you shortly.” Ladybug calmed her. There was a bit of cold in her voice, but it was probably because she just finished fighting her a moment ago.

“I told you it’s magic.” Pomeline grinned victoriously while she whispered at Colton.

“Ehm.” Suddenly, the group was startled by the sound of someone clearing their throat behind them. “Mind explaining to me why are you here and not evacuated with everyone else?”

“Oh! Um… You see…” Maps started, but Pomeline was too focused on something else. “Where did you learn magic! Can you teach me?! I mean we go to school here and I want to help if Lord of Butterflies and his Demons attack again!”

“Lord of Butterflies?” Ladybug walked to them and asked, again startling the whole group.

“Yes. There was an old book in the library. I managed to decipher part of it and it spoke of the Lord of Butterflies and Demons he sent to possess people. But there is only so far a translator on my phone could take me. I’m not exactly fluent in Mandarin.”

“Can you lead us to it?” The superheroine was showing almost too much interest.

“Will you teach me magic?” Pomeline tried to bargain. 

“Tt. You will take us there or we return with the police and you will take us there.” Black Cat was not in the mood. Blackmail was the last thing he wanted right now. 

“Fine.” The girl scoffed and led them toward the library.

“How did you summon a watermelon?��� The smallest girl asked zooming over to Ladybug. “Are you a summoner? I never played a summoner. They have some nice spells I suppose…”

Ladybug, against herself, giggled at the girl’s antics. She also noted in the corner of her eyes that Damian was also smiling under the hood. 

Nobody noticed when Erica slipped away.

-------

The library was large and dusty. It didn’t look like many people came here.

“It’s the old building. When Bruce Wayne funded a new library with new books, they decided to just keep the old one as an archive. Now only people that come here are us and Mr. Scarlet.”

“The new library totally had nothing to do with Damian Wayne getting expelled for the fourth time.” Colton joked and Ladybug giggled when Black Cat muttered a curse under his breath. 

“The book was in the back. I didn’t want to move it…” 

When they turned the corner, they saw a woman in a blue and purple dress standing over a book with a tablet. She was taking pictures of the pages. Her skin was blue and her hair purple. 

The group immediately pressed against the wall, and Pom pulled a handheld mirror to take a look around the corner without risk of being spotted. Meanwhile, Ladybug and Black Cat looked at one another and their faces took a serious expression. There was a kind of silent dialogue going on between them and they both nodded at the same time. In complete silence, Cat used his staff to up and meld with the shadows. Only his green eyes were visible until they too disappeared. 

Ladybug opened her Yo-Yo like a phone and took a photo of the feathered villain. She was turned to them, but even something as simple as that could be a major help. Kwami bless magical phones for making perfect pictures without a flash. 

With the proof needed, she aimed her yo-yo, spun it twice around before throwing it forward. The projectile sailed true and wrapped around her arm holding the tablet. The villainess was surprised and let go of the tool as Ladybug yanked on the line and made her opponent lose balance. That was the cue for Black Cat, who swooped from the ceiling, snatched the tablet, and leaped back into the shadows. 

“Ugh! Stupid peasants!” The Peacock cursed. Instead of freeing her hand, she allowed the fan to slip into her hand and unfolded it. She tried to pull on the yo-yo’s line and make her opponent fly to her. It worked, but Ladybug twisted mid-air and came at the villainess feet first in a kick. The blue woman had to block it, but she still held the line. The heroine used it for her advantage and flipped the line over Peacock’s neck and started to choke her. It also held her in place. Black Cat, who already deposited the tablet in a safe place, swept down and tried to grab the brooch, but he got kicked back by an angry woman, fighting for a breath. 

Peacock folded her fan and swiped at the line, cutting it and making Ladybug fall on her back. The Villainess took a deep breath and looked around to analyze her situation. She was outnumbered and the element of surprise was still on her opponents’ side. Even without the yo-yo, Ladybug was a formidable foe and she wasn’t sure who the new Black Cat was. She had a silent suspicion, but nothing solid. 

“Until we meet again, fools.” She leaped up and onto the shelves. Cat went in pursuit, but she saw the kids hidden behind one of the shelves and purposefully made it fall when she jumped onto it. The kids didn’t have enough time to scatter. Predictably, Black Cat went to save the kids. 

He pushed Maps from under the falling shelf but got stuck there himself. His suit and enhanced body could withstand it, but not his bruised ego. 

“Don’t be a grumpy cat. We’ve got her tablet.” Ladybug stood over him and grinned before helping him stand up. 

“Tt. We might have our first lead.” He grinned. 

“Let’s go check the book itself. The fact she was after it makes me think it has more value than I first suspected.”

----------------

Masterlist // Next

[hyuniebaby]

Focus (9)

Pairings: Baekhyun x Y/N x Junmyeon

AU: College student! Baekhyun, Professor! Junmyeon AU, college!au

Genre: smut

Warnings: daddy kink, oral, marking kink

A/N: I think this is the longest I’ve ever written. I hope it doesn’t bore you... I really had fun writing this! I hope you enjoy reading it~

@coffee-prince-kyungsoo @thighhighsanti

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11

Mr. Kim likes to separate his personal life and his professional life. Whenever he is in front of his students, he is a professor who focuses only on teaching what he should be teaching. Outside of the room, he’s just a regular man with regular friends, living a regular life. But somehow his personal life got overlapped with his professional life when you ended up in his Bio class.

He has overlooked whatever thing you had with Baekhyun inside the class. He doesn’t call you out if he sees Sehun or Baekhyun flirting with you. As your professor, he doesn’t react. But outside the classroom, you are his friend. And somehow you had shared intimate moments. Outside the campus, he can tell you what’s bothering him and you can tell him what’s bothering you. Just like how he told you that he lost rational thoughts when he saw you with a hickey the other week. Just like how you told him that you were mad at him for not letting you cum.

Mr. Kim hasn’t even been able to go out of the room yet after he dismissed the class when he saw you approaching Baekhyun. He lifts a brow, curious as to why you were approaching Baekhyun. He knows you well enough that you don’t do the first move. Even with him, it has to be Junmyeon who starts talking first before he could ever get a word from you. He’s only ever seen you initiate conversation when a) you’re with your girl friends, and b) when you have a question that you can’t answer by yourself.

He subtly watches the two of you while he slowly fixes the laptop he used for class. Somehow he thinks this conversation might’ve been about Baekhyun’s statement that claims he kissed you. This was the first thing he heard when he entered the room. Truth be told, he wanted to know more about it. Was Baekhyun just saying this to Sehun to let him know that he slept with her and have Sehun back off? Did it happen after Junmyeon got a taste of you? Did something happen between you and Baekhyun that he wasn’t aware of? He had so many questions and he couldn’t get the answers. Not right now, at least.

He sees you calling out Baekhyun, but the male wasn’t reacting. Maybe you two had a fight? But then he sees you hold Baekhyun’s hand. His eye twitches at the sight. He watches how you started talking to Baekhyun and how he robotically replies. The next thing he knew, Baekhyun was leading you out of the room, your hand still clasped in his. The sight irks him. Why were you holding hands with Baekhyun? Byun fucking Baekhyun, who you had slept with. The man who marked you first. The man who got to sleep with you and touched you the same way he did. It upset him, especially since you have recently made up and had a talk about the possibility of having a “next time”. Why was Baekhyun always getting to you first? The thought made him angry, furious even. He watches you get away with Baekhyun while holding hands. He‘s going to get his answers as soon as possible.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Should you tell him? You stare at Baekhyun as if his face holds the answer to your internal question. You start to notice the moles on his face and how stunningly beautiful he is. His hair was parted in the middle. This hairstyle suits him, you thought. He looks back at you with the same fascination but also with curious eyes. Suddenly, you forgot he even asked you a question as you were so entraced by his beauty.

He clears his throat and the spell gets broken. “I know it’s still not my place to ask... but who ever did give you the hickeys?” He repeats his question.

This was a question you thought you could easily disclose with Baekhyun. You’ve even practiced what to say when you were having your small study breaks over the weekend. But now, in this moment, whatever script you prepared in your mind was lost.

You break the eye contact with him, suddenly you feel like you don’t want to tell him. But it’s only fair he knows right? You told Junmyeon about him. Baekhyun should know about Junmyeon right?

It was harder to tell him about Junmyeon because he‘s your professor. And although your school isn’t necessarily strict with these kinds of things, you’d hate it if word gets out. Students gossip and the thing about gossip is that it gets twisted around. It could easily morph into something extremely different and no matter how much you deny, the image of you being all intimate with your professor will be embedded in their minds. Nevermind how much you worked hard for your studies. Whatever you did with your hardwork will be disregarded. All credit will be given to the act you committed. People will automatically think that the reason you have all sorts of opportunities and high marks were because you slept with professors. Even if you actually only ever been intimate with one professor. Even if you didn’t actually sleep with Junmyeon.

These thoughts scare you. You look over to Baekhyun and wonder if you could trust him with this information. You see how he had a look of worry on his face because he can sense your unease. There was something about him that made you want to trust him. You breathe in to calm yourself.

“It’s okay if you don’t tell me—”

You cut him off, “It’s Junmyeon. It’s Mr. Kim.”

Baekhyun was shocked. He opened his mouth, wanting to say something, anything, but no words were coming out. There were so many things swirling in his mind. He remembered the first day of class where Mr. Kim would sent lingering stares at you. He remembered the way Mr. Kim smiles — almost smirking — at you whenever you tell him the correct answer to his question. He remembered the knowing look Mr. Kim gave Baekhyun the next Bio class after he slept with you. Now he understands the look. And it sure as hell irritates him.

“I know it sounds bad... But I just want you to know that this isn’t a normal behavior for me. I didn’t even know he was teaching in the same school. I didn’t even know he was teaching at all.” You say in one breath.

He didn’t seem to hear you. “When... when did it happen?”

You look down at your lap. “The day after we had sex.” You mumbled.

“What?!”

“It wasn’t even supposed to happen!” You defend yourself. “He saw me and Jongdae walk out of the janitor’s closet, just a few minutes before you saw us. And he wanted to talk after my classes were over. And he saw the hickey you gave me and...” You peek at Baekhyun. You see him frowning. “Bottomline is we didn’t sleep together.”

“But you did something.” Baekhyun concludes.

You stayed quiet. It was the confirmation that he needed. He pinches his nose. All this time he was being jealous at Sehun when he should’ve been looking out for Mr. Kim.

He was silent after that. You understood though, it would have been too much to handle in just one seating. You can see the gears turning in his head.

“I thought the whole point of marking someone was to claim them.” He mumbles under his breath

You weren’t able to hear what he said. “Sorry?”

He clears his throat and repeats what he said with a louder voice. “I thought the whole point of marking someone was to claim them.”

You could feel your blood going to your face, a sign that you were blushing. You didn’t know how to respond to that.

“I don’t like sharing, Princess.” He tells you nonchalantly.

You stare at him, trying to figure him out. And also trying to figure yourself out. Why does he seem like he’s okay with it now? Did Baekhyun still want you? Did you want him? What about Junmyeon? What if you wanted both of them?

Your thoughts were cut short when your phone rings, it was a call coming from an unknown number. You look at Baekhyun as if to see if it’s okay for you to answer the call. He nods.

“Hello?”

“Hey darling, it’s Sehun. Are you finished with your date with Baekhyun? Should we meet now?”

“Oh, Sehun! Uh— not quite. Maybe a little later?” Baekhyun raises his brow. Even if nothing‘s happening between you and Sehun, the fact that he somehows get in the way between you and Baekhyun irritates him. Why does he always steal you from him?

“Fine then,” Sehun answers. “I’ll send you an address, meet me there.”

“Okay.” With that, he ends the call.

“Can I borrow your phone?” He asks before you could even bring down your phone.

You look at him curiously but gave it to him anyway. You see him typing and clicking. You take this moment to check him out. You’ve been to focused on what to tell him that you didn’t even had the time to appreciate his choice of clothing. If you weren’t worrying about the confrontation with him, you would’ve drooled a long time ago. He was wearing a fitted shirt and a chain necklace. It was just a t-shirt but somehow it made him look extra good. You can see his form perfectly with the fit. He had an amazing body, his shoulders wide and his waist slim. It was enough to make you excited. Your eyes move to his hands — the prettiest hands. You suddenly felt hot. You remember those hands that were in you. The thought drove you insane, you remember how good it felt and how you wanted to feel it again.

You scold yourself for being so dirty. You’ve just disclosed the fact that you’ve been touched and marked by another man. You doubt he’d even look at you that way again. But you were wrong, you were so wrong.

You were so lost in your dirty thoughts that you hadn’t noticed that Baekhyun was done using your phone. He looks at you and reads your body. He saw this look on you before. He knew what you were feeling and he smirks at the thought. He places his hand on your thigh and you jolt at the sudden touch. Your eyes immediately snap to his. “You should eat, Princess.” He says, voice dropping an octave. You comply, wanting to distract yourself from the thoughts you were having a while ago. He grips your thigh and you almost whimper. He lets go and smirks. He then eats with you, but you can see it in his eyes, he was hungry and not for food.

When you were done with your lunch, Baekhyun settles the bill but you protest. He then leans and whispers, “You can pay me back in other ways, Princess.”

He guides you back to his car. You tell him you were supposed to meet Sehun after this but before you could finish your sentence, Baekhyun cuts you off. “I’ve already told him you weren’t coming and that you’d meet him tomorrow.”

You furrow your brows and start to protest but he shushes you with a kiss and tells you you’re coming with him.

The drive was short and before you knew it, you were in Baekhyun’s apartment. He holds you by your waist as he leads you. When he reaches the door, he unlocks it with his right hand while his left hand suddenly squeezes your ass. You stare at him, only to find him biting his lips, eyes filled with lust. This look was enough to make your legs weak and your core wet.

Once you enter the apartment, he slams you to the wall and locks your lips in a heated kiss. He was a great kisser, you could get lost in his kisses. He bites your lip and you whimper. His body immediately reacts with the sound.

You break away from the kiss and ask, “Where’s Jongdae?”

He takes this moment to kiss your neck, “He’s in a meeting, don’t worry.”

You place your hands on his shoulder as he continues his assault on your neck. His hands move from your waist to grip your boob. You moan at the sensation. He places his thigh in between your legs and you instinctively rub yourself against him, desperate for some sort of friction. “Fuck, baby, you look so hot like this, rubbing yourself on my thigh.”

He lifts your shirt and unclasps your bra within seconds. He grabs your mounds and sucks harshly on your nipple. He gives equal attention to your mounds. It felt so good. He felt so good. He then grabs your legs and says “Jump.” You comply. He carries you to his room while he sucks on your neck. He makes sure he leaves plenty of hickeys. He drops you on his bed and he takes this time to undress. You start removing your pants and panties too, too desperate to feel his skin against yours. When he’s fully naked, he lays on top of you and starts kissing you again. He swipes his finger into your core, “I love how wet you are for me baby.”

He slides his finger in and you whimper at the sensation. He slides it in and out of your pussy. You’re unable to kiss him back because of how good his fingers made you feel. He kisses you one last time before you see him going down on you. He licks your pussy and starts to you eat you out. “You taste so good, fuck. I can do this all day.”

“Daddy, please...”

“Please what baby?”

“Please fuck me.”

He pulls his fingers out sucks on it. He hums in approval. The sight makes you drool. He grabs a condom from the bedside table and puts it on himself. He lines himself to you and pushes in without warning. You moan out loud. He doesn’t move until you squeeze his hand. He raises your legs and fucks you hard. “Daddy, you feel so good.” You moan out loud.

“I bet Mr. Kim won’t make you feel this good. Mr. Kim can’t fuck you like this.” He growls, his pace quickening at an instant.

He turns you around and pulls your ass up. He inserts his cock to your pussy and fucks you impossibly faster. He slaps your ass, “That was for being naughty and letting other men touch you.” You whimper at the pain and the pleasure. You feel your core clenching.

“You like this baby?”

You moan his name loudly as a confirmation to his question. His pace was so quick, his bed was creaking so loud and the headboard was banging loudly on the wall. He was holding your hips so tight, you were sure it would leave behind bruises. You were so lost in the pain and pleasure to care.

“Daddy, I’m clo-close!” You scream.

Baekhyun rubs your clit. “Come baby, come for Daddy.”

With a few more thrusts, you stilled and came. Your walls tightened so much, it wasn’t long after that Baekhyun reached his climax. Your legs would’ve given up if Baekhyun wasn’t holding it. He pulls out and throws out the used condom. He grabs a wet towel and cleans you up. When he’s done, he lays beside you and says, “That was amazing.”

“Yeah.” You smile. You were so tired, you immediately fell asleep. He covers you in a blanket and sleeps beside you, his arms naturally wrapping itself around you.

A few hours later, you wake up. Your head was on Baekhyun’s chest. You blush. Baekhyun was still sleeping soundly. You look around, searching for a clock. You sigh, it was 7PM. Baekhyun woke up when he felt you moving. “Hey,” he says with a raspy voice.

“Baek, I have to go, I have classes tomorrow.”

He smiles at the sound of his name coming out of your lips. “Stay, I’ll drive you there tomorrow.”

“I can’t. I don’t have clothes.” You whine.

“You can borrow mine.”

“But—“

He kisses you to shut you up.

“Fine, but I can’t be late! I have Mr. Jung’s class and you know how he is...”

Baekhyun laughs, “Ah yes, he used to scold me a lot for being a few minutes late. You’ll be fine though, I’ll make sure.” He winks.

You hate how your heart suddenly started beating so fast at the sight of his wink. It was even more devastating when you realize he still hasn’t worn anything yet and you could see his milky chest. You suddenly had the urge to paint his neck and chest with blues and purples.

Baekhyun sees your eyes darken. He didn’t know you had this side in you. It was turning him on. “Don’t start something you can’t finish, Princess.” He says with a husky voice.

As if your body had a mind of its own, you went to straddle Baekhyun. Your lips latching on to his. You kiss his neck next. You suck on his neck and his chest to mark him. You didn’t know how long you did it or how how many you gave him. Because the next thing you know, you were under Baekhyun once again. “That’s enough, baby girl.” Then you find yourself being thoroughly fucked by Byun Baekhyun for the second time tonight.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

The next day you wake up with Baekhyun still sleeping. He looked so peaceful, ethereal. You didn’t want to wake him up from his slumber. You get up as quietly as you can. Your body was so sore from last night’s activities so you tried stretching out a little. When you’re done, you tried to wake Baekhyun up. “Baek, wake up.”

He stirs from his sleep. “Baek, I need clothes.” You try saying. Baekhyun opens one eye, he looks adorable like this, you thought. He gets out of the bed and grabs some clean clothes and a towel for you to use. You thank him and told him he can go back to sleep while you shower, which he does as soon as his head landed back on the pillow.

When you got out of the shower, Baekhyun was already awake. He stares at you in his shirt and unconsciously says, “You look good in my shirt.”

You blush at how endearing he sounded.

“Let me wash up a bit and I’ll drive you to school.”

You use this time to cover the hickeys he gave you with some concealer that you always have in your bag. You only ever use it to cover the bags under your eyes whenever there’s an exam coming up. You can’t believe you’re using it for something else.

When you both stepped out of Baekhyun’s room, you froze at the sight of Jongdae seating by the couch. He gives you a knowing look. “Oh Y/N, good morning! Great to see you here. With Baekhyun.” He smirks. He looks at you and then at Baekhyun. He sees Baekhyun’s neck littered with hickeys which he didn’t bother covering up. “While you’re here, there’s this assembly for the Chemical Society next month, Joohyun requested you to be part of the committee.”

You frown. You hated working for events like these, but Joohyun insists all of you and your friends do it. And because you’re her friend, you let her drag you along. Despite hating the responsibility, it was fun working with your friends like this. They did tend to get a little over excited at planning and go overboard and you’re the only person with a voice of reason so you keep them grounded. They needed you. So you always comply.

Before you can accept the invitation to be part of the committee, Baekhyun says, “We have to go. She has Mr. Jung’s class.” Jongdae nods in understanding and bids you good bye.

Baekhyun only promised to drive you to the campus so you didn’t expect he’d get out of his car upon arrival. You give him an inquisitive stare. “Do you have to do something here too? Did Mrs. Lee call for you again?”

“No. I’m walking you to your class.” He smiles at you and you can’t help but feel butterflies on your stomach.

He doesn’t speak any further as you walked side by side. It was a comfortable kind of silence. When you reach your room, you both stop. You face him and say, “Thank you for driving and walking me to class.”

Baekhyun nods and smiles, “Anything for you, Princess.”

You turn around to enter the room, you cheeks reddening. He looks at you as you go and doesn’t move until you’re out of his sight.

As Baekhyun was walking back, he’s taken aback when he spots Mr. Kim coming his way. Mr. Kim just got out of one of his classes. He fixes his specs and goes straight to Baekhyun. “Mr. Byun, if you have time, please come by my office later.”

[imnotwolverine]

A special request

Henry Cavill x reader oneshot

Word count: 1.566 (it was supposed to a drabble mkey?) 

Disclaimer: just fluff

Summary: One of your fanfiction stories has made it to the silver screen, starring Henry as your lead. During a talkshow the two of you meet for the first time and fluffy awkwardness ensues. 

Author’s note: I dreamed this last night and I swear I was still blushing by the time I woke up - woops. 

‘Welcome, welcome Henry! Do sit down.’ The applause slowly died down as Henry sat down, smiling at Graham.

‘Thank you. Thanks for having me Graham.’

‘Now. I’d like to kick in this door straight away. We have a little surprise for you.’

‘A surprise? Okay.. haha’ Henry smiled, raising an eyebrow at the audience.

‘Don’t worry, don’t worry. We’re not going to kidnap you or anything.’ The audience laughed. ‘Now! You’re currently touring for your newest film and we found something that probably would..eh..tickle your fancy.’

‘You did?’ Henry gave a hesitant look at Graham.

‘Before we bring out the surprise, I’m curious; you received the script, which was based on a fanfiction..about you. Did you ever get to read the original story? The fan written one?’

‘I..did..actually. Wait. Please don’t tell me you’ve managed to get her here.’

‘Well..’ Graham shrugged and snickered happily. ‘..time to see for yourself.’ Graham jumped up from his chair and gestured his team to bring in “the present”.

Squinting your eyes and laughing hesitantly you walked up the stage - near losing your footing as you were to occupied with the bright hot lights that shone at the red couch. Meanwhile Henry looked over his shoulder at his “present” and it was clear to anyone he was struck with confusion.

Wait. THIS was the writer?

Graham was first to shake hands with you, allowing Henry some time to quickly scramble up to his feet.

‘Hello dear! So good to have you here and welcome to the Graham Norton show!’ The audience applauded happily as you grinned, your eye soon to land on a slightly flabbergasted Henry.

‘Hi.’ You giggled.

‘Uh..hi.’ Henry outstretched both arms, pulling you in for an awkward hug, leaving you no time to even register what was happening.

Graham chuckled and sat back down, twisting in his chair while you and Henry quickly took your place on the couch, a blush on both your cheeks.

‘So! SURPRISE!’ Graham smiled, flailing out his hands and near throwing his cards in the excitement.

‘This is..a surprise for sure.’ Henry breathed, looking back over at you.

‘First impressions?’ Graham cooed, seeing the nervous but curious looks the two of you shared.

‘Eh…damn you are way bigger than I had expected.’ You blurted out, laughing giddily. ‘I guess pictures DO only tell half the story.’

Henry laughed shyly, looking at his knees for a short moment before he looked back up at you, intrigued by what he saw.

‘Thanks..I guess? And as for me..well..I’ve never seen a picture of you or anything. So I must admit my imagination had run a little wild on what ..you..would look like.’

You raised your eyebrows, slightly surprised: ‘But you have thought about it? Wow. So do you always do that when reading someone’s story?’ You turned slightly, folding your arm over the backrest and pulling up a leg to get more comfortable.

‘Eh…’ Henry’s mind blanked for a moment as his eyes quickly flicked back and forth between Graham and you.

‘Admittedly..no.’ He licked his lips, looking at the audience for a slight as he continued. ‘I..guess this is a good moment to admit that I have read your work. All of your work. And I read your stories WAY before my agent even sent me that script.’

‘Really? Oh…’ Your face flushed bright red at the thought - all those paper thin plot lines to indulge in pure Henry smut? Yes. He read all of them.

Henry smiled, also leaning back on the sofa and moving an arm over the back rest - near mirroring your pose.

‘I really liked them.’ He said matter of factly, searching for eye contact with you. You smiled awkwardly and the fact the audience was “awe”-ing right now, didn’t help much in making the situation any less awkward.

‘Ha..That’s..good. Good. Wow I hadn’t expected that.’ You resumed, sitting up a bit and looking at Henry. He smiled warmly.

‘Okay. Maybe for the audience: just to kind of …share a little intel here.’ You looked at the audience. ‘I write fanfiction that includes what you best can describe as ..porn? With him being one of my regular characters. So. Yes. This is.. strange.’

The audience let out a loud chuckle, some people wooing.

‘Yea..well I’m glad they picked the romcom story to be filmed. Otherwise I might have had to make a career switch.’ Henry shrugged, grinning at the thought. You laughed.

‘Yea..even movie magic would have a hard time translating that in a PG-13 kind of way.’

The two of you snickered and Graham finally leaned back in.

‘Now Henry. You HAVE read all of her material. And you say you DID have some ideas on what she’d look like. I am probably not the only curious about what it is you were expecting?!’ The audience agreed with Graham and you also shrugged, admitting the curiosity was there.

Henry gave an exasperated look at the audience, then directed his attention back at you.

‘Well. Let’s first of all say I definitely didn’t expect anything close to what you look like, so bear with me. From the stories you wrote I could distill that you were at least medium height, probably dark or red haired and I figured you’d have green eyes since your first stories included a lot of characters with green eyes.’

‘Well, you got that right.’ You shrugged, seeing Henry hesitate.

‘I however didn’t expect you to be this…pretty? Eh..goodness this really puts me in the spot now, doesn’t it?’ Henry smiled awkwardly, hoping you wouldn’t get mad.

You however didn’t mind. If anything this was pure gold for your smutty heart.

‘Thank you…Hmm..Gosh this makes the whole situation even more weird. But I guess I could have expected as much. A few weeks ago someone reached out through my DM’s, asking if I wanted to be part of this show. I initially thought someone was pulling my leg. But alas. I got curious. Asked for their contact info. Contacted them. And yes. This was REAL…and now I’m HERE. With you! Life is so weird.’ You rambled, shaking your head in slight disbelief.

‘Well I’m glad you accepted the offer. It’s ..truly nice to meet you. For real now. Not just by reading your work.’

You smiled. ‘It’s nice to meet you too…Henry’ He grinned and you finally, finally dared to take a real, close look at him.

‘You really are one handsome man. Yeeus. In my mind you had like..some medium okay skin, some hair out of place and perhaps a crooked tooth or something. You don’t however. And your eyes are SO much more blue than I had expected. And that heterochromia..’ You gawked in amazement. ‘..okay..now I’m really just babbling. Sorry.’ You sniffled and quickly reached for the glass of wine that stood forlorn on the table.

Henry smiled and followed your movements with quiet curiosity. What he was thinking? Nobody knew.

Graham had been uncharacteristically quiet for some time now and was leaning in to intervene, but decided against it, sitting back in his chair. There was something going on between the two of you that was close to actual real chemistry. Sparks flying and all.

You noticed Graham’s hesitance and gave him a questioning look.

‘Oh please continue.’ Graham smiled, folding his hands in his lap like an excited school kid.

‘Eh okay..’ You turned your attention back to Henry, his blue eyes studying you. A giddy smile tugged on both your lips.

‘So do you write from own experiences?’ He asked.

‘I guess I do. Pretty much everything I write does come from my perspective, my experiences. Though of course..I fill in a lot too. Like..characterising you.’

‘I thought you characterised me pretty well.’ Henry smiled, seeing another shy blush cross over your cheeks.

‘Really?’

‘So much so that I maybe..saved some of your stories on my phone just so I could read them when I need it. Like…’ Henry pulled a face. ‘..like when I am feeling a bit lonely I’ll read the romcom stuff. When I’m fed up or annoyed some of the short stories - love your Geralt work - and when I’m a bit horny..well….’ The audience laughed. ‘Yea. It’s quite unique to be able to read porn about..yourself.’

‘Oh gods.’ You shrunk away a bit as Henry offered you a cheeky smile.

‘It’s…really good.’ Henry gave you a warm, unapologetic smile as you quickly drew in a breath, calming your nerves.

‘Dearness me. In a way you are fanboying over my work and I am fangirling over your work. And that’s all fun and games till you actually meet each other. Are we like…each others fans?’ You asked.

Henry’s smile grew as he tilted his head.

‘I guess we are, hmmm.’ Henry smiled, thinking.

‘Yep.’ You nodded, also somewhat lost in thought.

A quiet moment snuck in as you both took on a pensive expression.

...

‘He—.’ ‘Heyy.’ You both spoke simultaneously.

‘Ladies first.’ Henry quickly added.

You smiled: ‘If you have any special requests…I mean..I’d gladly…write..for you.’ With every word you became more confused, seeing Henry burst out in laughter, shoulders shaking.

‘That was just what I was about to ask.’

‘Hmm? Really?’

‘Really.’ He smiled, leaning in slightly. ‘First request. How about ..a first date?’

[demoanais]

Just found your blog and I absolutely agree with everything you've said regarding the treatment of Sharon in TFATWS. What hurts the most is that EVC has third billing in the show yet is getting paid dust. (So is Mackie tbh, the writers are really giving him nothing to work with.) All I wanted from this show was found family with Sam, Sharon and Bucky but it looks like we're not even getting that. So much wasted potential with Sam and Sharon paralleling Steve and Peggy in terms of the legacy theme.

Thanks for writing!

The marketing and interviews for the series have sent a lot of mixed messages when it comes to Sharon, but one of the few things that encouraged me was EVC being third billed when the show premiered. i hoped that meant she played a significant, integral role after sam and bucky, but now I think it's just the consequence of her agent negotiating her a slightly better deal than the films.

and we're on the same page re: mackie, too. my primary concern is sharon's treatment because she/EVC is what brought me here (and because of all the terrible shit she went through before), but if I had the energy I'd have plenty to say about how sam (and bucky and zemo) are all being grossly underserved by the writing.

you mentioned the connection sam and sharon could have with legacy, and that's the rub: it's not even remotely hard to make that link (or many others); it practically writes itself. the narrative is contorting to avoid having these crucial capfam characters actually find some empathy and encouragement from each other? build themselves back up from where they began? what was the phrase... shared life experiences? it's alarming the lengths they go to to shoot it dead before it even leaves the ground.

at my most, most skeptical, i was confident we'd have worthwhile action scenes with sharon, even if she was doomed to being an afterthought in every other respect. now i read that skogland said she requested the EVC solo fight sequence in the shipyard because there were initially 'too many people' in nagel's makeshift lab. and she created the club scene because she wanted to see sam, bucky and zemo dancing in evening wear.

so that's why sharon owns a club? that's why she beat up those guys by herself 'atomic blonde' style? just to get her out of the way? if that doesn't sound like fanfic indulgence, i don't know what does. and like a moron i thought that fight scene was conceived to a) showcase that sharon's seen some shit b) establish her strength and skill and c) act as kolstad's de facto marvel film audition.

EVC killed the scene obviously, but it chafes with the rest of the set piece. watching it you know that sam and bucky can hear her screams. there's absolutely no way i buy that neither of them would go outside to back her up and uh, make sure she hasn't just been killed?

i've seen some say that they accelerated the interrogation because they heard her struggles and exchanged some worried looks, but i wouldn't be surprised if that was merely an acting choice and not indicated by the script. fact is that skogland doesn't give a fuck about sharon and spellman only thinks she's worthwhile after her #CoolGirl rewrite.

this show just puts sharon, sam and bucky one step forward and five steps back both in terms of their individual arcs and their collective journey. and it's all for the sake of re-establishing the same status quo that the movies ended on with barely any real gains - seemingly none at all for sharon.

i know that's a general D+ disease, but if you really want to excavate a bunch of foregone conclusions for the sake of luring subscribers, at least make it a worthwhile character study (i'm sure they think they've accomplished this). instead we're sludging through 6 messy hours of incoherence and confusion for what probably amounts to 36 total minutes of any significance (sharon still being alotted her traditional 7, naturally).

[farouchelyoptimistic]

HyunJi: Visit

Soo Hyun hums as he punches in the security code of the door, pushing it open after the brief beep. The familiar scent of honey and vanilla fills his nose, making him erupt into a small smile.

The house was quiet as he entered, the cove lighting dim and warm-toned. The floor to ceiling glass windows reflected the lights from the city below. The silence doesn't bother him, he was used to it. It was always quiet in his girlfriend's abode, she enjoyed the tranquil serenity that comes with it.

The paper bag in his hand made soft noises that sounded louder in the vast space of her living room. Filming had been going on for quite a while, and it had been getting harder and harder to reach her every day. She had scenes back to back and a few ads to shoot in her spare time. That was the price of her growing popularity, the recognition he was terribly happy that she was getting.

She was a marvelous actress, excellent. Despite her prowess, she was fairly underrated and he hated it. He wanted people to see her beyond her elegant beauty, he wanted her to be seen by her undeniable talent. And now she was getting it, and it made him so proud of her. But along with that came fewer hours with her, fewer days to spend together.

Compared to the frequent visits and the well-planned secret dates here and there, this time he could even barely see her despite being in the same place every day. The only time he could see her was when they had scenes together. The fact that he had to corner her away on set to steal a few glances, a few touches, a few smiles made him fairly frustrated.

He used to have his girlfriend all to himself, and now he's sharing her with the entire world. He's not a selfish person, but when it comes to her, sometimes he wished he was.

This was one of the very few nights that they were both free. He doesn't waste the opportunity to buy her favorite meals to go, bringing it to her home to share with her.

"Hi, Manny!" He coos, squatting down to pat the dog's head, it's fur warm and soft to touch. It wags its tail, putting out its tongue as it welcomes the all too familiar visitor. Gone were the days when it used to bark at him endlessly, threatened of his presence, or probably even jealous that he'd take all of the attention. But now, they were best friends.

He chuckles as he stands up, making his way further into the living room, past the kitchen. He smiles widely at the sight of his woman sitting prettily on the couch, dressed in a light pink nightgown, her hair cascading elegantly over her shoulders.

"Yea Ji-ah!" He calls out to her in a joyful operatic voice, routinely skipping towards her with her a huge smile.

"Ya." Her low voice stops him in his tracks. It was chilling, cold. It almost sent shivers down his spine. When she looks at him, he shuddered, freezing him in his spot. Her eyes were sharp, lacking emotion altogether. Terrifying almost.

"You noisy little prick." His breath falters, shock starting to bloom all over him. He blinks once, twice, thrice. Trying to figure out what vile sin he had done to his girlfriend for him to get stabbed by the invisible daggers darted from her eyes.

It takes him a few seconds before he sights the script on her lap. Realization dawns over him, making himself let out a breath. Aaaah.

She had been rehearsing, which means his Yea Ji wasn't here tonight. Moon Young had paid a visit. That was the effect of her method acting. She had to be the character altogether, and sometimes it takes a while longer to let go of it. He understood that was what worked for her, and he could say she was doing a good job manifesting it.

He had been used to it as well. There were days when he visited only to find a timid Sang Mi sprawled on the living room floor. The other time it was the outspoken Hae Ji reading a book by yhe window. Tonight it was a very annoyed Ko Moon Young.

"Ko Moon Young, I didn't expect you would visit." He chuckled, the amusement in his voice ringing as she turned on his heel towards the kitchen counter. He knew she's still trying to snap out of it, so he prepared all the food quietly, bringing it over on the coffee table between them in the living room.

She quietly slides down from the couch into the warm carpet. She picks up her chopsticks and eats silently, chewing, and swallowing. He smiled watching her eat.

He had longed to hear her talk over dinner tonight, but by the looks of it, it wasn't going to be happening. He loved listening to her ramble about the most mundane things, her low pitched voice becoming music to his ears. The sultry, raspy tone of it making his heart come to a calm, bringing him serenity.

She was quiet, but he still enjoyed it. He was happy just by watching her eat, devouring everything in front of her. If there was one thing she and Moon Young had in common, it was the appetite. He had worried about her thin physique early in the relationship, but seeing the amount she manages to gobble down, he realized her eating dynamics had nothing to do with her figure. She was just natural beauty. Lucky him.

He made the kind effort if washing a few dishes, humming softly as the water gushes through the faucet. When he feels tiny arms wrap around his waist from the back, he smiles. He loved it when she did that.

"Is this Moon Young, or is my Yea Ji back?"

"I kicked Moon Young out. She tried to steal my boyfriend." He chuckles, turning the faucet off before he wipes his hands dry.

He wiggles in her hold, turning around so he was facing her. He lets out a smile, wrapping his arms around her small frame. She looks up at him with a smile, eyes curved into thin lines, and in an instant, he loses the capability to breathe. She continues to take his breath away, every single time.

He squeezes her tighter, pulling her impossibly closer.

"Did you enjoy the meal, hmm?" He tucks a few strands of hair behind her ear, marveling down at her. When she nods he smiles, cupping her small face in his large hand. When he leans in for a warm kiss she automatically closes her eyes, both of them smiling in between.

Her hands instinctively travel over his firm arms, around his nape, her fingers through his hair. He holds her tighter as if it was possible to have her any more closer. Their bodies were already pressed tightly against each other.

When he pulls back, he grins. He took pride in the idea that he was able to kiss her like this, hold her close. Touch her. Do things only others can imagine. He took pride in the fact that now she had freely allowed him to make her feel things, do things, to take the lead.

He couldn't forget that there was a time when even the slightest touch bothered her. Sent her blushing excessively, cowering under his stares and gentle brushes. He thought he was probably so despicable, she couldn't bear even the slightest intimacy.

But it wasn't him. It was her innocent values, blooming from her genuine wholesome perspectives of the world. He learned to ask for permission whenever he wanted to kiss her, to gradually inch his hand to hers so she doesn't get startled. It took her quite some time to get used to it until all the permissions became automatic. Instinctive.

He didn't need to work it out anymore. She could read it in the way he looked at her. And she learned to be confident around him as well. Initiating gentle touches, hugs, short kisses. They've come a long way, but she still had that innocence in her, the innocence he loved so much. He loved anything about her anyway.

"You stink." She mutters in a chuckle as she buries her head against his chest, inhaling his manly scent. He only laughs, swaying her side to side. She was the most honest person in the world, she was incapable of lying. So he really does stink.

"Hmm, really? I just came from the gym." She laughs.

"You should have showered." His laughter thunders, throwing his head back.

"I know. I was thinking I'd shower here instead. . . . . with you." She automatically unlinks her arms around him, playfully pushing his chest.

"Ande." She takes a step back, turning around with a laugh. It wasn't like she hated intimacy, she just can't help but feel uncontrollably shy. Even after all the nights they've spent together, she still couldn't help the warm blush that would creep up her cheeks.

He chuckles, holding on to her wrist to pull her back gently. He wraps her arms around her again, searching for her face. She couldn't look at him.

"Weh? It's not like I haven't seen y---" He gets cut off when she presses a hand against his mouth, sending both of them in light laughter.

"Stop it." She whines, furrowing her brows, pouting her lips.

"Stop what?" She lets out a gasp when he slightly lifts her up, setting her feet on top of his. He grins at her before he pulls her closer, pressing another kiss on her lips. He slowly walks them across the room, her feet on top of his, taking every step he was taking.

She held his arms tight, maintaining her balance as he leads her. She giggles in between the kiss.

"I know what you're trying to do."

He chuckles while he kisses her.

"Really? I'm just making my way to the shower." She shakes her head, smiling as she closed her eyes. Gone were the inhibitions when he starts to trail kisses on her jaw. She clears her throat at the growing heat that was starting to spread like wildfire all over her body. Her reaction to him was automatic.

A low moan erupts from the back of her throat when he trails hot, wet kisses down her long neck. She finally gives in to him as he makes his way inside the bedroom, straight to the bathroom. He was a little persistent than usual. He must've really missed her. But she couldn't deny it, he missed her too.

-end-

[cherrysung]

mon amour

pairing: jisung x reader

genre: strangers to lovers au / fluff

warnings: mucho fluff

prompts: none

summary: a short walk to the convenience store paired with your clumsy feet gifted you the world’s biggest heart, and an answer to the question that had always haunted you.

not requested.

word count: 1.6k

note: this is my first scenario, I hope you enjoy it!

cherrysung’s navigation

Love is a very strong word, with many different meanings at that. One people use too much sometimes, and one people regret not having used. How do you know when you love someone? Do you mean it? Do people mean it? How do you even know when you mean it?

You often wondered as a kid what the word and action—love—meant.

Strangely enough, you weren’t thinking about love that one day your mom sent you out on your way to the convenience store in need of some eggs for your dinner. You also weren’t aware of how clumsy your feet generally are as you mindlessly walked back home, the sun that set behind the mountains providing you with a last bit of warmth before cool nighttime took over.

And so; your mind somewhere else, your feet struggling to find a nice pace, and the bag of eggs in your gentle grip dangling from side to side—you tripped.

Not surprising.

What was surprising, though, was the fact your body never hit the ground, but was rather caught by what felt like two strong, lean arms.

“Are you okay?” The person who was once nonexistent in your life, and then suddenly a stranger, asked with genuine concern. He looked young, almost your age, but his beauty was definitely something out of this world. His face was flawlessly highlighted by the last rays of golden sunshine, thin rimmed glasses resting on the bridge of his nose, and his white earplugs dangling by his ears after lightly taking them off.

Quickly pulling away from his grasp with tinted cheeks, you nodded, avoiding the stare that was calmly taking in your flustered expression with a hint of amusement.

“You... dropped this?” The boy smiled sheepishly, realizing the bag you were previously carrying, was full of eggs... that unfortunately cracked.

If anything now your face was completely red without a doubt, unable to deal even with the smallest amounts of embarrassment. “Don’t worry about it.” You managed to speak up. “I can buy more.” But your worries only increased as you noticed the sun had completely set, and your mind began filling with thoughts of your stressed, preoccupied mother that pondered over your lack of early arrival.

The freakishly tall boy smiled again, his narrow eyes creasing ever so slightly and his nose scrunching up in an attempt to push his glasses up. “Here,” your eyes watched as he raised his arm a tiny bit, noticing the bag of eggs that his hand, unlike yours, actually held tightly. “Don’t go to the store, it’s late already, which is not safe at all. Take these, I have more at home so it’s fine.”

Your mind was telling you to decline his offer. Yes, it was only a bag of eggs, but your mom always warned you to not talk to strangers, much less accept something from them. But, something in your heart told you to take them. He looked like a very kind boy—timid, but very nice. Also, why not? Your mom was going to beat you if you got home without them.

Reluctantly, your hand reached out, grabbing the bag of white and beige eggs before a smile etched its way onto your face, “what’s your name?”

“Park Jisung.” Your new acquaintance, or at least you hoped he was, answered as his lips mirrored your own, quickly throwing in a small folded, ripped paper into the bag held by your much smaller hands, unknowing to you. “I have to go, but I hope we can meet again.”

Your eyes watched as who used to be nonexistent in your life, then a stranger and now an acquaintance, calmly turned around and began making his way home. You panicked, wondering if you’d ever actually meet him again, “wait! My name is Y/N!”

Now you find yourself here, laying in bed, remembering how you met the boy who you once thought was only someone you randomly crossed paths with on the streets because he offered some of his help.

You didn’t know you’d get home that day only to be yelled at by your mother, or that you would find the ripped piece of paper Jisung smoothly dropped into the plastic bag when you weren’t looking. Much less did you ever think his phone number would be messily written down on it.

More so, you did not think you would actually text him.

As you stroke the sleeping boy’s hair next to you, you realize that’s one of the best spontaneous options you’ve decided to choose. A simple action brought so much joy into your dull life.

Little did you know so much would follow; little hangouts—whether it be at his house or yours, a couple parties and late reunions at shady diners. Your life became so colorful with Jisung in it, so interesting and so full of happiness, you didn’t even notice the day you caught feelings. Even Jisung himself didn’t notice when he caught feelings for you either.

After many hangouts, parties and late meetups at shady diners, same routine after same routine—followed little, cute study dates neither of you dared admit were really just dates, with the study excuse excluded. Eventually came your actual first official date arrived when Jisung finally found the courage within his system to ask you out.

By your fifth romantic occasion, followed your first kiss, a day engraved in your mind you will never forget and certainly one of the most special. Maybe it was the innocence of the moment and how you both were inexperienced with no idea on how it worked, or maybe it was the millions of butterflies that created chaos in the depths of your stomach as Jisung leaned down to press his lips to yours. He was intoxicating, the faint scent of strawberries and baby shampoo in his messy locks filling your entire senses as your lips molded against his slowly.

It was a very short and sweet kiss, with accidental teeth clashing initially due to your lack of experience. Even still with many small mistakes, it was full of trust and love and pureness that you wouldn’t change for anything else.

Yet again, you didn’t notice the day you fell in love, neither did he.

Realization eventually dawned upon you, when you started hearing in your ears how your heart thumped crazily against your chest every time your eyes landed on him no matter how many times you had already seen him before. How you felt like your world was complete if he was in it, and how you felt sad when he was sad, or happy when he was happy. Every single little thing he did was enough for you to burst out into excitement; but most importantly, his presence or voice alone could make your heart do so many consecutive leaps.

You came to the conclusion that it was indeed love, when anything that you did together took a special place in the secrecy of your fragile heart and emotions. Jisung could take you to a cheap restaurant, write down adorable letters instead of gifting you expensive jewelry or Valentine’s Day chocolates. The two of you could simply stay at home after ordering questionable takeout from the corner chicken shop while you watched cringey movies with awful scripts, the list could go on. In spite of any of those things who anybody would deem wrong, you love him. At the end of the day, you’ve saved and appreciated all of those memories sincerely; and still do, like now.

As your fingers kept running through his brown locks gently, you finally understood this was the meaning of love that you had been searching for all along. Love for you wasn’t what you heard in the movies or read in the books. Love, for you, is Jisung. Your love lives in him, he is your love.

A soft whine brought you out of your endless thoughts, your head turning to look at the very sleepy boy beside you as his eyes opened slowly to look up at you.

Your heart did a leap, as always. Even with a tired, swollen face, messy hair and an angry pout, Jisung still looked flawless in your eyes.

“Y/N, what are you doing awake at 4 in the morning, it’s so late?” Your boyfriend slurred, his eyes struggling to remain open.

You sent him a small smile, shifting on the soft mattress until your arms were carefully secured around his waist and his head rested happily on your rising chest with every breath you took.

“I was thinking about something called love. it used to be a mystery to me.”

His head turned to look up at you slightly, hair sticking in all directions and some covering his forehead, it was a sight you never wanted to forget. “Used to? Did you find your answer?” He asked, but spoke up once again with a playful glimmer in his honeyed eyes, “oh, I know. You love me.”

An unsurprised chuckle left your lips at your boyfriend’s cocky words, but you nodded your head anyways, “I don’t only love you, Jisung. You are quite literally the love of my life, I’m sure of it.”

“I don’t only love you either. You are also the meaning of love, to be frank, I am impossibly infatuated with you.” Jisung answered with blushing cheeks. “Love really is unpredictable and can come from nowhere, even from meeting a strange girl whose eggs cracked because she wasn’t aware of her ungraceful walking.”

You cracked a laugh, jokingly smacking his head softly. “Yes, and because of a boy who basically slid into my DM’s in real life.”

Gentle snores sounded throughout the room as they slowly left Jisung’s slightly parted lips, head still on your chest as your hand resumed with its massage on his scalp. You whispered quietly before closing your eyes.

“It was you all along. The one you love defines love.”

That’s how your journey on ‘what does love mean?’ came to a finish.

The answer was very obvious. It was your boyfriend, Park Jisung. Your love.

[evajellion]

FF5 Four Job Fiesta: Part FINAL

I finally did it. We beat Exdeath. It took 26 hours in total, longer than my first playthrough by an hour, but I did it.

I knew I was going to have to grind, and it was going to be a slog so I put on some background noise while I began my grind for experience in the forest and tower sections of the N-Zone. (it had the least amount of brutal enemies)

There, I unintentionally picked up several Dragon Fangs from the Aevis Dragons, an item that would inevitably be the most useful drop I could get from the game. I reached Level 37, which wasn’t ideal, but I stuck with it and made my way back to the last area.

Once again, I began to grind, this time for AP so Lenna could obtain Dualcast. At the time, she was my Red Mage. Once I found out that Dualcast with the Red Mage only allows for the weaker spells, I was pissed because I had spent time getting 999 AP for her. Then, I realized I could just give her back the White Mage class and stick Bartz to being a Red Mage.

You’ll understand why I made such an effort for Dualcast later.

I switched Faris to a Chemist temporarily so she could learn Mix and captured a King Behemoth while I was at it.

With that, we were going to fight Exdeath. Not once, but twice. The first being an experiment, since I learned about a glitch.

You see, if you cast berserk on Exdeath’s initial form by using the Chemist job, he’ll pretty much be stuck in an “offense only” script, that will overwrite his defeat sequence into the second phase. This will completely skip the final boss and take you to the ending after an awkward, shaking screen without dialogue.

Similar tactics are used to break Exdeath in speedruns, so I wanted to try it for myself. I used a Kiss of Blessing on Exdeath, and found myself constantly reviving my party with the Chemist since he was dealing 2000 HP worth of damage. (side note: the Chemist’s ultimate ability can revive all party members without MP, very overpowered)

Thankfully I did set up Protect and left my party members to heal on one end, then attack or cast Holy on free turns. Rinse and repeat, Exdeath was dead but he was so angry that he didn’t go into his second phase. A victory, credits and all, but an empty one.

Even I know that truly beating this game requires facing the real final boss.

Meet Neo-Exdeath, and just listen to his theme.

This fight… took about four, maybe five times before I got my strategy down. Dear god.

Firstly, we set up our defenses on Exdeath’s previous form, casting stuff like Protect, Shell, and making sure my Chemist ingested Giant and Speed Drinks. 

Next, since I gave the Mix ability to Faris, I let her use the Dragon Fangs I collected to create Dragon Power, something that would boost the level of my party drastically so they could do more damage, especially Lenna.

Once we got to the Neo-Exdeath phase, we had to get that Magic Lamp out. Bahamut and Leviathan are good damage dealers while Odin will kill that segment of Exdeath all the way in the back, saving us trouble. After which, Faris would unleash the King Behemoth that was captured to deal damage on all three remaining halves.

With one out of four of Neo-Exdeath’s halves gone, I immediately had Lenna Dualcast Holy on what remained. Krile would attack with the Chicken Knife or revive, Faris would use the whip or mix items, and Bartz was stuck as the healer mostly but also functioned as back-up Holy.

Once every few turns, usually after he uses the annoying Almagest, a magic damage attack that deals hefty damage to the entire party. Sometimes it will be immediately followed up with Grand Cross. Unlike FF9, we don’t have an Angel’s Snack to deal with whatever Neo-Exdeath decides to cast on us.

Usually one party member gets stuck with Silence, our Red Mage stuck in Berserk, and someone else gets turned to stone. To my luck, Neo-Exdeath didn’t use Zombie or any Doom-related ailments, so I never had to worry about a countdown timer. I ran out of eyedrops, so I couldn’t mix a cure for any of these ailments, but I did have a spare Soft to get rid of being petrified.

Since Lenna had been beefed up from the Dragon Power, she was consistently dealing 9000-18000 damage with each Holy dualcast. Sometimes I would have to sacrifice a second Holy in order to heal, if only to survive whatever physical attacks he could throw my way.

Sometimes Neo-Exdeath will use Dispel, which will undo buffs on a party member. Easy enough for Krile to remedy through another Speed Drink, but Bartz and Lenna were often stuck recasting Protect and Shell.

After killing off two more of Neo-Exdeath’s halves, he pretty much goes into a desperation mode, something that nearly all final bosses in this franchise do. He’ll start casting Meteor much more frequently, but will then burn himself out really badly and use a wimpy Comet attack that barely makes a dent in my party.

I constantly heal and cast Holy at this point, and ignore putting up Shell again since there’s no point this far into the battle. I’m getting as desperate to kill him as he is to rid of my party. One last stab from Krile’s Chicken Knife, and that was it.

The battle was over, for real this time since I finally killed Neo-Exdeath. The world is saved from being sent back to the void.

I watch half of the ending… aaaand my game freezes, for some reason. Don’t worry, I think something is wrong with the emulation or my PSvita, because it did that the last time I reached the ending to this game. I’m still very much satisfied with just defeating Neo-Exdeath, end credits not required here!

As for my overall playthrough rating…

Lenna Charlotte Tycoon - White Mage

Ability: White / Dualcast

White Mage is an MVP you want on any team. Healing and Holy is just the way to go. Being stuck with bonking your enemies with a staff isn’t as bad as it seems, as you can tell from the first part of this playthrough.

Bartz Klauser - Red Mage

Ability: Red / White

Oooooof… jack of all trades, master of none. This class was good early game, but falls apart so badly. Magic and equipment both get really mediocre in the late game, and it has the lowest HP. Really wish I had gotten the Summoner instead. Yeah, probably the least good of the jobs I got. The only saving grace is Dualcast, which I gave to Lenna.

Faris Scherwiz - Beastmaster

Ability: Catch / Mix

Beastmaster is a really fun physical class! It’s best used when paired with a Blue Mage, but we didn’t get that. Still, probably the most capable in terms of physical offense, and I got some good use out of capturing monsters and controlling them. Wish the whip was a bit more accurate though at times.

Krile Mayer Baldesion - Chemist

Ability: Drink / Revive

I was so scared when I rolled this one because I had no clue what to expect. I had no idea this would be the job that saves the fight against Exdeath, with its mixture and revival abilities, no MP required. If I ever play this game again, I am going to definitely utilize this job more, it is now a favorite of mine.

Overall, despite my gripes with the last half of this game, the rest of it and the final battle have been so much fun. I can’t wait to talk more about it at the end of the year. I also really enjoyed coming up with new strategies with the jobs I was given.

Thank you all for reading. If you haven’t played this game yet for some reason or done a Four Job Fiesta, I highly recommend it.

[goose-books]

(original image credit to @/theyshane on unsplash)

a month or so ago the wonderful and very sharp-fanged @yvesdot said i should make a post about the process of Working On A Podcast - what, exactly, does that entail? and so today i set down upon your table a long post about the process of this podcast, its unique struggles, and What Comes Next!

for those of you who are new here: a modern tragedy is my podcast-in-progress, a loose retelling of three of shakespeare’s plays (romeo&juliet, hamlet, and macbeth) set in a modern-day high school. or, alternatively, “so so much drama localized inside a few overlapping friend groups of gay* people”

post under the cut!

tag list (ask me to be added/removed): @piyawrites @harehearts @bisexualorlando @guulabjamuns

*well. gay people and indrajit “macbitch” chopra. never let it be said i don’t have cishet rep 😤

what i mean when i say “podcast”

sometimes when i say, “i’m writing a podcast,” people get the wrong idea - they think i’m going to sit down, maybe with some friends as guest stars, and talk into a microphone for an hour. what i really mean is that i’m writing a fiction podcast - something like an audio drama, if you will.

i’ve had this story concept for a long time (since i realized i was gay, actually. sometime around my coming out i was like “...sapphic romeo and juliet. oh i’m a genius”), but it never really worked as a novel. my inspiration for making it a podcast was the penumbra podcast! which i am not caught up on but which dragged me shirt-collar-first into the world of podcasts. [blowing a kiss to mars] for juno steel.

i will admit that i actually... haven’t listened to a ton of podcasts. mostly because my incredibly helpful attention-deficit brain said listening to things is impossible forever. but let me tell you that starting to write AMT in script format worked immediately. and in hindsight? it makes sense. i mean, i am retelling some of the most famous plays of all time... why not get a little theatrical with it?

the process so far

the podcast is drafted! all 16 episodes of it. all... 176k words of it... only took me a year and a half...

i have my main cast together! AMT has a lot of side characters, not all of whom are cast yet, but my main recurring squad is gathered and i love them all VERY dearly. (also, the population of people i know irl is 75% theater kid. so i think i will be able to figure out the side character thing.)

within the group of voice actors, i also have three assistant directors, a term i use loosely because mostly i just mean… those are my right hand men. the main folks i bounce ideas off of and the main folks i have helping me organize all of this. i’ve said multiple times that i’m just the keyboard monkey and would be hopelessly out of my depth without my beloved assdirectors. (shoutout to @asimpleram, the only one who uses tumblr, you are my best friend and i love you oh so much)

i also have two “bootydirectors” who gave themselves that name and that’s just the people who know the most about recording technology and acting. thanks kings

right now the scripts have been sent out to some sensitivity readers and i am currently editing! (both with regards to sensitivity reader feedback, and also just editing the plot and character arcs in general.) (if you want me to send you AMT and you’re willing to give me your thoughts i will straight-up send it to you honestly just know it’s LONG)

i actually did not consider that writing this might be uniquely hard before i started

fun max tip: if you look too far ahead down the road and realize the breadth of the project you’re taking on you’ll freak yourself out so just dive into things headfirst without checking both ways or considering your actions!!! [i am giving you a double thumbs up from behind my monitor]

i have never written anything like AMT before! it has been an experience! there have been some unique struggles!

working with other people is harder than i expected! which is not about my group, all of whom are lovely people. it is about me and my little OCD rat brain that hates letting go of control. even though... an inherent part of writing a script... is that at some point other people will be involved... wild, i know.

9 main characters! AMT has 9 main characters. this is somewhat excusable because the whole thing is episodic and more like a season of a tv show than a novel. but still. 9 main characters. why did i do that

i’ve never written episodically before, so i’ve had to figure out how to fit the plot into appropriately spaced intervals. there are three running plotlines (one for each play), and they’re all parallel and eventually convergent. so everything’s happening at once and it’s… hard to make episodes that aren’t just “max threw a bunch of scenes together because they were happening at the same time.” (i will admit i’ve defaulted to chronological order when spacing episodes, so the timeline doesn’t get confusing. but i hope each episode is cohesive on its own.)

balancing the tragedy and comedy in tragicomedy has been… interesting. i do to some degree feel like AMT’s gone darker than i initially imagined it; while it’s a high school retelling of these plays (and thus there’s no. there’s no murder. the only person who dies is isaac’s dad and that’s six years precanon), all three plays deal to differing degrees with suicide, among other things, and it felt… disingenuous not to write about that from a modern high schooler’s perspective.

i can guarantee a long-term happy ending for AMT! i cannot guarantee much about what’s in the middle. (there are sixteen episodes; one of my directors likened episode 7 to a five-act play’s third act, when things really start to… hit the fan. he’s right and i’m obsessed with thinking about it that way)

the massive amount of time i have been working on the thing: i started writing this podcast in january 2019. i finished writing it this past summer (2020). that’s two summers that have passed without my recording it (which is obviously easier to organize in the summer… or it was before covid but you get my point). this is… a little disheartening? i don’t know; oftentimes i underestimate how long writing projects will take me. what it comes down to is my urge to put out content vs. my urge to make it perfect…

…especially since i’m technically competing with one william f. shakespeare. (the f is for fucking.) i mean, dear old billy shakes DID write the plot out for me ahead of time, which i appreciate, but still…

AMT is absolutely consumable if you don’t know the first goddamn thing about shakespeare’s works. that said. i assume some of the people who will listen to it are shakespeare enthusiasts, casual or otherwise, and that’s a little terrifying! AMT is a shakespeare retelling, but i’ve made these characters very much my own, and i suppose i worry about how others will approach that, and whether they will disagree with my interpretations, or the way i’ve adapted the plots, and so on and so forth... i just have to live with this one, honestly. i think i could edit AMT for a thousand years and probably still find something to change about it, so i will simply have to get over myself.

that said, i don’t regret the amount of time i’ve spent on it! i think the time i’ve taken to draft and edit these episodes has been well worth the wait; i’m genuinely very happy with what i’ve created, and whether or not you agree with, say, my interpretation of a modern hamlet family dynamic, i hope it’ll still be enjoyable!

so what’s next?

as i said earlier, the scripts are currently in the hands of sensitivity readers, and i’m editing!

over the summer, the cast met on zoom frequently to read through and rehearse scenes. and i will not lie it was the most fucking fun i’ve had this entire wretched interminable year. i am constantly charmed and befuddled by the feeling of Listening To My Words Read Out Loud By A Human Voice and also i love my friends so very much

we have a tentative plan to gather the cast (socially distanced and responsibly, of course) over thanksgiving break to make some actual stabs at recording! i am too afraid to concretely promise AMT Episode 1: Fortune’s Fool by the end of 2020 but like… i’m not NOT promising it! send me your finest vibes. we’re close.