#i just realised this needed to be on my blog

[hyperfocusthusly]

Lifelines

——-

Tommy had been staring at his phone, typing out a message, an apology, anything. He always ends up deleting it. Over and over, so when it actually rings in his hand he almost drops it. The news hits him like a train, pushes everything else to the background.

His sister is dead. Her and her husband, car accident, didn’t stand a chance.

The flight is bad, the funeral worse and then someone from social services shows up with a baby he met once when she was newborn and only really recognises from pictures. The woman hands him a 6 month old child and explains that this is what they wanted. The will stipulated that he would be their guardian in such a circumstance.

He stares at her tiny face. She stares back.

He shuts the door and wonders how anyone could think this was the right choice.

——-

He has to tell his Captain. He chooses to tell Lucy. He distinctly chooses not to tell anyone else.

——-

Babies are hard, as it turns out. There’s no room for grief with an insistent baby taking up every waking second. No rest from being relentlessly needed. No telling her she’d be better off without him.

He thinks about calling.

While he watches her crawl down his hallway after a woodlouse, pointing insistently, letting out an excited little “ah!” as the bug in question scuttles under the shoe rack. She follows it carefully, watching with an intense curiosity that makes something churn deep inside Tommy’s chest.

He thinks about calling.

The first time she gets a fever and won’t settle unless she’s upright on his chest. It’s not the first time Tommy has gone 24 hours without sleep but it feels worse. His nerves scraped raw from her distress. His hand on her back counting her breaths over and over. He thinks about calling.

But what could he possibly say?

——-

The secrecy works until it doesn’t. Until the morning that Chimney is stood in the local doctor’s car park watching Tommy, darker eyed and more scruffy, strap an 8 month old into a seat in the back of his truck. Tommy doesn’t see him, or hear Jee whisper “is that Uncle Tommy daddy? Is that his baby?”

——-

It’s how Chimney ends up stood outside of Tommy’s door one lunchtime. He isn’t home but Chimney knows he needs to wait. He knows what trying to handle a baby that age by yourself is like.

When Tommy gets home and sees who is waiting for him Chimney has to give him credit for actually pulling into the driveway rather than continuing in the opposite direction.

Tommy gets out of the car, Chimney doesn’t miss the moment he takes to collect himself before looking up to him.

“What are you doing here Howie?” He sounds ragged.

“Just checking in, two months is too long, I’m sure someone owes someone a beer.”

He goes for light hearted, trying to ease out some of the tension that has appeared in Tommy’s stance. He is hovering by the back door of his truck, fingers tucked into the door handle, endlessly thankful that she closed her eyes and fell asleep on the drive home. Something hovers in the air between them until Chimney takes a step forward.

“I saw you at the doctor’s last week.” Tommy’s brows crease slightly, then pull back as he realises what Chimney is actually telling him.

“Are you going to hide her from me forever?” Tommy looks relieved somehow, less trapped. He shakes his head and carefully takes her out of the car. Settling her into the crook of his arm and pulling her diaper bag over his shoulder.

“I don’t really drink beer too much anymore.”

“A coffee then?”

“Yeah.” He swallows nervously, tries not to let the implications of this meeting, and the conversation he knows is coming, get to him. “I could do with a coffee.”

—-

[read on A03]

Tagging some people who interacted with my abstract post about this (hope you enjoy!🫶🏻);

@leashybebes @beanarie @accefan-blog @big-urchin-energy @loucifersbitch @fyrehose @evansbuck-ley @sad-girl-hours23 @certifiedbisexualdisaster @theweewooshow @beckym2001 @kinardevans

And also some beloved pals;

@bidisasterevankinard @rubydaiquiri @sweaters-and-silly @apassingbird @sunnywithachanceofbi @theotherbuckley @desert--moonchild @comfortingevanbuckley @livelaughlou @epiphainie @actuallyitsellie @typicalopposite @wikiangela @bi-bi-buckleys @littlepaws9 @ohithankyou

[woodlouseteethandthetapeworms]

wednesday is not only the greatest betrayal in television history but the most maddeningly trite, disturbingly vapid, and internally confused ideological train wreck I've ever had the deeply sorrowful displeasure of allowing to pass through my corneas may god have mercy on burton or whoever else was responsible while someone slapped his brand name on it, and on all of us who are fated to live in a world where something so culturally, socially, politically, and artistically noxious as this Mary-sue- lead, transparently TikTok-targeted, phone- worshipping, vaguely bigoted, backfired virtue- signaling, fake leftist capitalist "my immortal" -esque fanfic earns a second season through what I can only be explained as manufactured consent. something must be done about Netflix's Wednesday. This thing is a condescending insult, especially to young people, the socially conscious, and members of marginalized and "outcast" groups who genuinely suffer from what this thing hollowly masturbates to while looking us dead in the eyes and saying "yeah, you like that, don't you?" It is a Gatling gun of random buzzwords and empty references to social issues, grotesquely and impotently disguised and screaming "I'm commentary!" before pissing its pants, squealing like a pig, and at its most coherent offering nothing more than to demonize mental illness and make any marginalized identity out to be a mayonnaise-stained Hot Topic hoodie through Wiseau-ian dialogue, inappropriate "grittiness" for its source material and Harry Potter setting, and incessant hackery. I am shitting. I am pissing. I am standing over a warm bubble bath cradling a toaster and sobbing, chanting g-d's secret name and praying that there is indeed a hell so I can be eternally punished for having given this moral abomination one fraction of a fraction of a cent also it's not a good Addams family adaptation.

- W.W

[totally-sapphic-posts]

We don’t have to talk or be doing the same thing, we can just exist in the same room together, doing our own things, and be happily separate together.

[aardvaark]

im so glad that we never get a clear picture of sophie’s background in leverage & i hope we never do. however i also really like making up various, often conflicting backstories for her in my head. perhaps they’re all backstories for an alias of hers, ones she laid to rest back in season two.

[imeriayapping]

✷ Valentino Rossi inspired jewellery set ✷

(please follow @imerian for all of my crafts)

[sexy-sapphic-sorcerer]

1: Magic is a Metaphor > 2: Morgana is a Lesbian > 3: Merlin is Gay > 4: Arthur is Bi

Obviously, magic is a metaphor for being gay. It is something that you're born with, that you can't change, but that you have to hide because the society around you won't accept you. Both Merlin and Morgana are always saying that they've been made to feel like a monster, an outsider, and they just want to be accepted for who they really are. And it's no coincidence that they are the most queer coded characters in the whole show.

But building off of that subtext, I think that you can read the different way that Merlin and Morgana go about trying to achieve equal rights as being an allegory for queer identity politics, where Merlin embodies this homonationalist assimilation strategy. He believes that if he stays closeted and conforms to the status quo, then eventually he will prove that sorcerers are good, moral, normal people and therefore worthy of rights. But over time, he internalises all of this shame and self-hatred and becomes increasingly obsessed with Arthur and dependent on his validation until he becomes complicit in his own oppression.

Meanwhile, Morgana represents a radical rebellion ideology. Even though she comes from a place of privilege, she quickly realises that she can't achieve meaningful change through constitutional methods and therefore resorts to violent protest. But her downfall is that she's more motivated by personal vengeance than a genuine desire for equality. So she creates a lot of infighting within the community by shunning anyone whose ideas aren't as extreme as her own, and she inadvertently confirms all of the negative stereotypes about 'angry witches' that she has been trying to fight against.

Obviously I don't think that all of this political commentary is intentional, but the basic idea of magic being gay is definitely intentional. As evidenced by this quote from the executive producer of the show, where he says very sarcastically, "some people say that (magic) is a metaphor for his sexuality, but that's just read in by them, isn't it? On no level is magic metaphorical in this show." And then Katie McGrath says, "it's funny because I don't actually think you're being sincere." And then she says directly to the audience, "Julian is lying right now."

[fantomeeee]

experimenting with artstyle

[cxndiedvi0lets]

"You can't help everyone,"

But, I have to try.

"Then, who helps you?"

[jovieinramshackle]

Oh my god 2025 ummm what the fuck amirite (it's not even for me yet it's over 10pm)

Okay so um hi hey hello. What a year huh (at least for me). So wild I transed my whole gender like damn the she/her to he/him pipeline was so real but ANYWAYS

I already said quite a bit during Christmas here but I would be lying if I said I didn't have a million more things to say. Even more to some certain mutuals/friends that have really been nothing but kind to me. Some old ones, some recent ones, I can't list everyone but I genuinely just appreciate any amount of support and love, big or small.

I've been thinking about whether I should directly say a few things to some mutuals/friends for a while (and I already have to some, but I don't mind repeating myself lol), but I think New Year's is the perfect chance to do so.

Apologies for the tagging in advance SUDISAHFIUHISDE

-

@crystallizsch I have already expressed to you how much I appreciate and grateful I am to you for encouraging me to make this blog, way before we had ever even interacted. I love you a lot buddy, you're absolutely the best<3

@oya-oya-okay OYAAA OYA OYAAA!!! I love you sm my darling friend, your kind words and support have genuinely been some of the biggest reasons I pushed through this year. I know the latter part of this year has been really hard for you, but I want you to know you have my support for whatever you need <3

@viperbunnies YOU HAVE MADE ME SOBBED SM ESPECIALLY WITH YOUR GIFTS. I sometimes go back to see your art of my persona or my oc just to make myself feel a little better. Ty for making me feel part of this amazing community (PS. I still get shroompocalypse war flashbacks/j) <3

@fell-e We have mostly chatted on Discord recently and legit you're one of the funniest and nicest people I've had the pleasure of talking to! I can't wait to interact more in 2025, you're such a nice person to be around <3

@lficanthaveloveiwantpower Hi Nah! We don't interact really one-on-one, but the kind words you've given me have always made me smile. You're one of the biggest reasons I got comfortable with openly self-shipping and sharing my thoughts about my f/os. And don't even let me mention how much joy your art has given me, you're seriously one of the best artists I've had the pleasure of being mutuals with <3

@theolivetree123 I'm a sucker for your ocs I won't even lie they're always so creative and fun! Still remember the time you asked to be mutuals and I just DIE/pos. It really was a pleasant surprise and I look forward to every post you make, whether it's art or just talking about your ocs and dynamics! You're extremely creative you genuinely inspire me a lot <3

@sunnysidesevenup I KNNNNOOOOWWWW we became moots pretty recently but like. You're so cool dude wtf. Legit freaked out when YOU followed ME first. I got cold feet about following you back for a while ahaha.....but I'm so happy I did you're such a fun dude I love your creations so much too (low-key biased towards Tilly...I love him sm and for what...)

@jadelover69 MIMI YOU ARE SO FUN, JUST SOO FUN TO INTERACT WITH YOUR WHOLE ENERGY IS SOOO SDUBHDSJNAGISBSJDH/POS your reblogs always make me giggle, even if it's just you straight up dying <3 Tysm for showing so much love for my creations, it means the absolute world

@summerspook You madman. I can't believe we've been friends for almost 2 years online. You have helped me through so much stuff, sometimes I even felt guilty about it. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being one of my bestest friends, talking to you is one of the main things I look forward to every day, I can't express how much appreciate you and our friendship <3

-

OKAY THIS IS ALL FOR NOW there are more of you but I can't articulate my thoughts and feelings the best, but either way I love and appreciate all of you with all my heart.

New Year's has slowly lost its meaning for me (I'm neutral about it) but at least I get to use it to show my application to the people who have been with me this year, mutual or not tbh <3

Also if you wanna say something back but not publically, dms are open for mutuals <3

[srue-on-fire]

Someone try to draw parallels between Dr Ana Flores and Tommy Kinard. Like, are there any?

Edmundo? Evan? Excuse me, what? Is that all?

@canonicallyobserving911 @woolridges @valenschmidt @stagefoureddiediaz someone? Please?

For context, I haven’t watched the show since S05 in a while. I know I know, I’m gonna catch up by this season’s finale.

[shifting-diary]

HOLY SHIT SHIFTING REVELATION:

I got a reading done a few months ago, that said my indecision on deciding where to go and overthinking my shifting routine, was keeping me in my CR.

For a while, I didn’t understand *why* this was stopping me from shifting, but then I realised:

The more I think about being anxious in my CR about trying to go to my DR, the more likely I am to be stuck here - because I’m too busy worrying about issues in my CR, when I could be worrying about my DR issues instead!

In shifting, you’re trying to detach yourself from your CR and move to your DR, so worrying about your CR problems is just going to keep you grounded in this reality.

And that’s why you. Let. Your. CR. Go.

[evil-mcytblrconfessions]

tumblr kww fandom was formed seperately from most other social media corners of the fandom. and that leads to silly things like the commonly used name "kww collab" and kenfies vs kenifies. and probably more. cedar if theres any more im forgetting that u know of say them pls

(in response to this confession)

[moonhze]

[disneyprincessdxminatrix]

Forever baffled when I see someone whining about not getting any notes on their posts but they have a DNI longer than the old testament filled with incomprehensible abbreviations, only make one post a month, and never reblog their own posts let alone anyone else’s. This is the interact with each other website or course you’re not getting notes like that honey.

[james-spooky]

this is a test

[deus-ex-mona]

up next on chapter 36 of idol sengen… _(:3 」∠)_