#i just hope you can be here. i hope you can directly witness a better world

[creatingblackcharacters]

Follow Up to the Follow Ups

Some feedback to the responses I received:

1) A lot of people said that fear and discomfort is what makes antiracism not worth standing alone for. Okay, so then I want you to say this phrase to yourself when it comes to that moment:

"I would rather be antiblack than be afraid in this situation"

Does it make you uncomfortable? More uncomfortable than speaking up? I want you to dwell on that! And no, I'm not saying this to hurt you; sometimes it is the better option to stay quiet. I recognize that you have to recognize your own weight class. (Not so much on Tumblr as it is in real life, granted 🙄) But this is often the outcome when we choose not to act. We just don't admit that to ourselves so directly.

Try to notice how often you make that choice, how often you even have to make it. If you find yourself saying this more often than not, do you still feel you identify as an ally when it comes to speaking up about antiblackness? I'm not saying you have to fight every single battle. I'm just asking you to take the time to notice how often you find yourself tolerating more than you don't. And if that's something that you genuinely feel isn't right, or that you want to change, do so! You have the option to strengthen your allyship!

2) I feel like my question about Black fans got walked around a bit. Tbh, that is already the reality Black people live in. The way you aren't comfortable speaking up, I don't feel safe assuming you're safe to be around. It's a far more perilous outcome for me, putting faith in the anti-racism of a person that I don't witness them express.

3) Fear, itself

How do you think I feel? 🤣 You're afraid to speak out on antiblackness because you're worried about the anger of, or- if we're being honest- the social consequences of speaking out? I have an entire page dedicated to addressing antiblackness in media while Black!

At any point, not for my own betterment but the potential- not even a guarantee, just the potential- of yours, I openly put myself at risk of racist ire to try make the space around me better. I've been called plenty of slurs and insults on my main discussing these things. It's not an easy choice to risk that vulnerability. Trust, I understand that!

It's honestly gone far better than expected, though part of that is because I have to police my own tone. I don't expect other Black people to do so, or to have to do so. I can only imagine an environment where people felt less inclined to treat me and my peers that way, that they felt the fear of social repercussions for their racism when they spoke instead of me.

My point here is, I'm not naturally built to be stronger than you when it comes to dealing with racism. The way you are afraid of your peers treating you, is the way they already treat me and my peers. I'm forced into resilience, I've spent a long time learning how to deal with this. If I can stomach living with this, you can occasionally take the risk and speak up. Again, I'm not asking you to fight every battle. But you're capable of more battles than you think.

That's it! That's the end of the introspection practice this week. Thank y'all for participating; I hope that you got some perspectives to take on with you.

[samsalami66]

Tough decision, but "I will hang on (until I can't anymore)" with Dreamling? (Soccer au maybe? 🥺)

🤘five-and-dimes

Shooting for the Sky

Hey my lovely @five-and-dimes! Thank you for the prompt, I had a great time writing this! I hope you don't mind some humour sprinkled in between the usual angst and fluff, the idea suddenly grew wings and took flight and I had zero control over it.

Morpheus is regretting every single decision he has ever made in his tragically short life that led him up to this moment. If only he wasn't at fault for a hundred percent of them, from starting to kick a ball around with Olethros at age ten, to signing his first professional contract and later joining the Fiddlers. 

This blasted team of absolute nutters. 

Team building, Hob has said with a smile and a glint in his eyes that Morpheus hasn't quite been able to place. Now he knows it to be unbridled insanity mixed with a healthy dose of sadism, joy granted by witnessing his best friend's early demise due to the heart attack he would surely suffer in the next few moments. 

Morpheus has heard about team building exercises where a team went to play minigolf or drove around with go-carts or some other safe and ordinary and fun experience. But of course his band of suicidal idiots would go skydiving for such an event. And of course they have all done this before, since they have zero sense for self-preservation and do not care about their personal well-being at all. 

Those words out of his mouth have only caused the other men to burst into laughter when he said them. 

So now he is here. ‘Here’ being an aeroplane about a kilometre above sweet British grounds, strapped like a toddler to Hob Gadling's chest. Apparently you do not jump on your own the first time you skydive, which has never been a thing Morpheus gave much thought to, since he never expected to find himself in this situation. 

But he has done a lot of things he didn't expect himself to do since he has met Hob. Wonderful, amazing Hob, who is currently resting his chin on Morpheus’ shoulder so he can look out the window while Morpheus himself is trying his hardest not to hyperventilate. 

The team would never let him forget it if he had a panic attack over skydiving. Their serious support ends with the after-effects of abuse, everything else will become part of the Terrific Team Tales (what an awful name), which they recap at least once a year on pub night, specifically to torture the other members with embarrassing stories of the past. 

It is a horrifying tradition. Truly grotesque. 

Morpheus will not give them more material by panicking. 

So, instead, he concentrates on Hob. 

Hob, who stands pressed to his back, head to calf, lending to him the warmth Morpheus so rarely feels on his own. Hob, who's scent envelops Morpheus like a hug of comfort and safety, calming him like few other things could these days. And Hob, who's midsection is pressed directly to Morpheus’ backside. Will be pressed to his backside for the whole dive. Together, in the air, putting his life in Hob Gadling's hands. 

Oh dear.

Perhaps the panic attack is the better option after all. These thoughts will only lead him to a single outcome, and he's absolutely not going to face this conversation after falling a whole kilometre out of an aeroplane. Absolutely not. 

Just as Morpheus is about to force his thoughts back onto the ridiculous ideas of his teammates, the voice of the pilot sounds over their headsets.

“We reached the final height for the jump! The door will be opened as soon as we hit the agreed upon coordinates. Have a good way down, gentlemen!” 

Cheers ring out around Morpheus, and ten men, Hob included, jump up and down with barely concealed excitement. Hob's jumping jostles him where he stands, and Morpheus barely catches himself before he would have crashed backwards into Hob. 

“Someone's excited,” he comments with a wry smile, which only turns softer when he looks over his shoulder to see Hob's bright eyes, shining with joy.

“I get to share one of my favourite activities with my favourite person, of course I'm excited!” 

Morpheus softens even further at that answer, Hob’s affection as always so easy to grasp. 

“Ugh, find a private channel to flirt on with your man, Hobert!” Sounds Corin's voice over their headset, and Morpheus can't help but chuckle at how he and Hob stick their tongues out at each other. 

“Ten bucks that I’ll land first!” calls Abel into the round, which Cain immediately meets with “Twenty bucks that you’re full of shit!”

“Fifty that you’ll both be last,” Mervyn murmurs, and the rest of the team laughs at their bickering, as they always do. 

Cain and Abel, the other brothers in the team, have a sort of love-hate relationship going on. Half of the time Morpheus is a bit worried they might kill each other with their antics, but in the end they would never seriously hurt each other. Though if it does happen one day, Morpheus believes the murdered brother would come back to life just so that they might continue their bickering. Mervyn likes to pretend that he doesn't find it hilarious. 

Behind Cain and Abel the door of the aircraft suddenly opens, the wind suddenly overpowering every thought Morpheus might have had. He couldn't look outside, as there were about nine burly football players between Hob and him and the door. But even just the coldness of the air against his face, unnatural in comparison to the cold he has felt so far down on safe ground, wipes his mind clean of coherent thought. 

“Ready?” Hob says, so close to his ear that Morpheus feels his breath on his cheek, clearly to avoid speaking over the open channel. It makes him shiver, but the cold covers the real reason just fine. 

“Absolutely not,” he replies as loud as he dares, while making grabby hands towards Hob's arm to hold onto. The other man complies immediately, and Morpheus digs his fingers deep into Hob's biceps. “But I'll be fine as long as you're there.” 

“If you change your mind, say the word, yeah? We don't have to jump.” 

“Kollité, I would do a lot of things to see you happy. Including jumping out of a plane with only a piece of cloth strapped to my back, like some crazy person.” 

Hob looks increasingly fond the longer Morpheus talks, and eventually he smacks a loud kiss to his cheek, and then another to his forehead and his nose and wherever he can reach from behind Morpheus’ back. It's silly and adorable and so Morpheus laughs, free from the fear of judgement he once had. 

“I like my men a little crazy.” Hob murmurs into his ear then, and Morpheus thinks he might choke on the thin and cold air. 

“Let's go boys!” Corin then calls over their headsets, which suddenly brings movement into the aeroplane. One after another, the Fiddlers jump out of the open door, some head-first, others (Ken) do a flip into nothingness. And all too soon, Hob and Morpheus are the only ones left on the plane. 

“Run. Makes it easier to jump,” Hob calls over the noise. 

Screw it, what is there to lose (except his life, the part of his brain that is not yet totally beyond salvation provides) anyway?

Together, he and Hob run the ten steps towards the door of the aircraft and jump. 

Morpheus regrets it almost immediately. 

Upon falling, his stomach swoops and turns in the most uncomfortable manner possible and when he looks down he sees certain death rushing at him. His heart pounds in his ears and he's pretty sure he doesn't breathe for at least a full minute with how light headed he feels as he finally sucks in his first breath. 

But then broad arms snake around his chest, impossibly warm hands are splayed across his ribs, and Morpheus feels himself melt against Hob. He trusts this man, quite literally with his life, proven as of this moment. After all, Hob is the one that has the parachute strapped to his back and he is also the one who knows how to work it. Morpheus thinks (hopes) that in an emergency he would remember the instructions Hob gave him a few hours ago and pull the right flap, but he prays it won't come to that.

He would much rather enjoy Hob's warmth against his back, the arms that hold him and not open his eyes again until they're on the ground once more. 

“Just hold onto me, love.” Hob whispers into his ear and Morpheus can’t help but snort. 

“Oh I’ll hang on, alright? Don’t think I will let you go though, once we’re on the ground.”

A chuckle, right beside his ear, and Morpheus simply closes his eyes and concentrates on Hob’s warmth, the wind on his face and the adrenaline rushing through his body. After that first moment of falling, the tingling in his stomach almost turns into a pleasant sensation and he feels like every breath fills his lungs up way past the limit. He could run a marathon right now without breaking a sweat, the amount of energy coursing through his veins is just perfect. 

Slowly he starts to understand why the other men were so excited for this team-building activity. 

Adrenaline-junkies, the lot of them. 

Morpheus opens his eyes next when they are suddenly jolted into a slower fall. As he looks upwards he sees the bright green parachute with the Fiddlers’ club crest in the middle that Hob has shown him during their preparation for the jump. Since this is a team building exercise, naturally all gear is sponsored by the club and usually Morpheus would find this incredibly tacky. But looking upon the crest of the Fiddlers only fills him with a sense of pride, to be using or wearing anything sponsored by this team is simply amazing. 

He’s proud of who he works for, who he’s representing, and the thought is so sudden Morpheus feels tears sting in his eyes. 

“Isn’t it beautiful?” Hob’s voice sounds next to his right ear and Morpheus has to blink a few times before he can see clearly what Hob is referring to. But once he does he lets out a small gasp of surprise. The sun is setting on the far horizon and a few clouds break her light just so that reds and purples and pinks colour the sky around them like the most stunning of watercolour paintings. 

“Oh,” he whispers as the tears suddenly spill over, his throat closed off with emotions he can't quite name. It really is beautiful. The sky, the view, the man behind him. His life, really. He's grateful for so many things in that moment, but he manages to voice one thing.

“Thank you, Hob. For taking me along. And being patient with me.” 

“Anytime, lovey. Anytime.”

[uncanny-tranny]

If there is only one thing I would want to tell all trans people, it is this:

Please make it. You are worth it to see a better future; we will make this world kind. You are so needed, you are so wanted. We will make this world somewhere worth our light. I hope you can be by my side forever, I hope we can bask in the beauty of this world. I love you, trans person reading this.

[writtenwhalien]

jump then fall (into you) | part 3

banner by the talented @jimilter​ 💖

pairing ↠ jungkook x reader

genre ↠ cruise AU, fake dating AU, best friends to lovers AU | fluff, angst, smut

word count ↠ 52k (pt 3. 14k)

18+ | warnings ↠ swearing, drinking, sexual content: foreplay, oral m. and f., protected sex etc.

summary ↠ bringing Jungkook along as your date to your ex’s lavish cruise wedding seemed like a perfect idea at first — all of your family and close friends together, nothing can go wrong… then Jungkook’s ex shows up and all of a sudden you’re in a years long relationship with him. You don’t mind though, really, how hard can sharing a cabin and pretending to be deeply in love with your best friend really be?

note. asdkjlfdsgh it's the final part, i hope you're enjoying! 🥰 don't forget to interact please xo

part 3 (final)

“Black or red?” Sophia held the two dresses against herself in turn, eyes scrunched as she considered each carefully. 

“I vote red.”

“No, black.”

Elisa and Shay, two of Sophia’s closest friends looked at each other in disapproval after both giving their choice. 

“Wait, what are you wearing again, Y/N?” No answer prompts her to turn around. “Y/N?”

“Huh?” You look up, slightly confused. “Sorry, dress, yes, I like both but I think the black will go with the Harry Winston your dad just got you.” The answer rolls off your tongue and you’re grateful that you already had this conversation with Thalia a few weeks back before you’d left for the cruise. 

She narrows her eyes at you and you can’t blame her. You’ve been zoning out on her all day.

“Sorry,” you wince, giving her a smile. 

“Something on your mind?” Sophia asks, having witnessed this earlier too. 

“Not really,” you answer. “Just tired.” It’s not true but you don’t particularly fancy sharing your current dilemmas with the girls despite how great they are at advice. Besides, it’s less than two days till the wedding and you’re not trying to make your problems everyone else’s problems. 

Sophia just gives you that look before carrying on as though nothing happened. “What dress are you wearing again? Wasn’t it the same red as this?”

You nod. Your dress for Thalia’s dinner tonight is a simple wine red dress with a tie up back. 

“Alright, I’m going for the black one then.” Sophia throws the red one on the bed and hangs the black one up on her mirror. 

“Now heels,” she says excitedly. The girls follow her into her closet and you get up too but not to follow. 

“I’m gonna go get some water,” you tell them, sticking your head into the door of the closet. 

“Can you get me some too?” Sophia asks, eyes scaling the shelves for the perfect heels. 

“Sure.” 

You walk away from the girls and towards the closest back staircase which would take you directly to the kitchen. It’s on the opposite side of the house, past many of the bedrooms on the third floor, one of which belongs to Alias. A part of you hopes to hear voices in the room, one voice in particular, but you’re only met with silence as you pass. 

Deflating a little, you go downstairs to the kitchen. As you approach, you hear voices, Thalia and Alex. They’re standing by the fridge, talking softly to each other as Thalia takes a few drinks from the shelves and Alex places them on a tray behind them on the island. 

Alex looks up and smiles when he sees you. “Hey, Y/N.” 

Thalia turns around, placing the last of the bottles on the tray. “Finally managed to escape Sophia?” 

You laugh, approaching the fridge. “Not yet. I’m just here for some water.” 

“She’s still choosing her outfits?” Alex asks, brows raised.

“Yep.”

“But she took forever when she was buying them, why is she still choosing?”

Thalia laughs. “She’s your sister, surely you know better than that by now. She’s got at least three new buys for one event, then she’s got to choose between them and don’t forget about the jewellery, shoes and hair choices that go with them.”

Alex puts his arm around Thalia’s waist. “I think you’re just as bad though.”

“Well why not?” Thalia answers smugly. “It’s just self love.”

“And that’s why I love you.”

You don’t cringe as they smile at each other all smitten, but surprisingly feel a small pang of pain in your chest. Looking away, you take three bottles of water from the fridge. 

“Are you going back up there?” Alex asks. 

You nod. “She’s almost done.”

Just as Alex nods, another voice enters the conversation.

“Need any help guys?” Jungkook pauses in the doorway the moment he sees you, meanwhile Alex and Thalia exchange sly glances. 

“Actually, yes.” Thalia puts down the drinks she’s holding. “Bring the drinks please,” she says, pulling Alex by the hand. “As bride and groom we don’t want to risk any injuries from all the heavy lifting,” she adds, with an air of humour and absurdity which her fiance shares and they don’t wait another second before disappearing from the kitchen. Just like that, you’re left alone with Jungkook.

He looks at you from across the island. “Hey.”

“Hey,” you smile, feeling your lips purse awkwardly.

For a moment, neither of you move and the air is ripe with hesitation. A hundred thoughts cross your mind but not one leaves your mouth. If Jungkook’s mirrored expression is anything to go off of, he’s feeling the same.

Eventually, it’s Sophia’s voice coming from somewhere in the house that snaps you out of it. “Y/N, we’re doing hair now!” she calls, followed by a faint giggle from the girls.

“I’ll just…” you dumbly don’t finish your sentence, instead opting to just point towards the staircase as you turn around and head back towards them.

“Your water.”

Turning around, you see Jungkook is pointing at the three bottles Thalia was taking out for you, left on the corner of the island.

“Oh, right.” You feel your cheeks warming up as you take the bottles, that was silly of you.

Jungkook steps around the island. “Need a hand? I can take them for you.”

“No, I’m good,” you answer, noticing the way he stops immediately in his tracks. 

When you look at him, his lips are pursed and he just nods, looking down. You realise he was probably just looking for an excuse to talk and you just shot it down. 

Stupidly, you hesitate, and just when Jungkook looks up at you, one of the chefs walks in, greeting you both as she places down a big basket of freshly picked tomatoes right on the island.

Without another word, Jungkook starts placing the drinks on the tray and you turn and retreat back upstairs.

That was so stupid, you think, trudging your way up. Since when has it ever been this awkward between you both? Sure, the last time you spoke wasn’t a good conversation but this is the first time you guys haven’t been able to get past it and it’s becoming almost agonising.

“Worst headache ever.” Alias just manages to raise his head from the table to have a sip of his coffee. 

“Take some anadin,” you say, just about managing to sip on your own iced coffee. 

“Here.” Elisa puts a blister pack in front of him and Alias groans as he swallows two together. 

The whole room around you is a similar scene. Kelce and a few of the other guys are knocked out on the lounge, while you, Alias, Thalia and a few of the other guys are holding strong and knocking back some coffee to help with the hangover. Last night got a little crazy for both parties involved. As expected, Sophia called in the strippers and when the last stripper finally lost his clothes, it was straight tequila shots for the rest of the evening and even Thalia got wasted. 

“This is exactly why I don’t drink,” she moans, resting her head on your shoulder.

You laugh, remembering just how many shots she took last night. It’s true that she barely drinks as much as she did, but when Thalia gets drunk, she gets drunk. 

“A hen night only happens once.” You remind her of her words and she groans in regret. 

“Maybe we should all go dry for a month,” Alias says. 

“Oh come on,” Dillon says, taking the Anadin and nudging Alias. “Give it a few hours and you’ll be ready for another round tonight.” 

“No way.”

“Yes way.”

“Whatever.”

Thalia laughs from beside you. It’s true, he’ll definitely be knocking back the rounds again tonight. After years of friendship, you know that all it’ll take is a coffee, a balanced meal, a cold shower and two to three hours for the anadin to kick in and Alias will be right as rain for tonight. The same goes for yourself and ideally you’d like to be your best tonight. 

This evening is the rehearsal dinner before the big day tomorrow. The house is full of excitement and jittering nerves from some but for the most part it’s just the excitement. 

“My sunshines,” comes Alex’s voice from around the corner before he appears. Honestly, all the excitement could be coming solely from him, you haven’t seen him so happy and carefree like you’re experiencing now. 

A wide smile plastered across his face, his eyes meet his finances as soon as he comes into view. They share a lingering glance, one full of adoration and content. Since arriving at the house, it was the job of the bride and groom parties to try to keep the bride and groom apart as is the Cirillo family tradition, but it hasn’t been going so great. For starters, the bride and groom parties should’ve been separate since arriving at the house and although none of you have been hanging out together much, you probably shouldn’t all be mingling together right now. No one’s really keeping check though, and Alex and Thalia seem to be doing well to keep to themselves. 

“You’re all finally awake,” Alex continues just as Jungkook joins him from around the corner. 

He catches your gaze just as Alias replies. 

“You actually drank the most last night, why are you so cheerful?” Alias asks in disbelief. 

“Maybe because he’s getting married tomorrow,” Elisa laughs. 

“Oh, yeah.”

“And I know how to hold my liquor, big brother.”

“And who taught you, little brother?” Alias sasses back. 

You’re not paying much attention, still looking at Jungkook. 

He smiles at you, a timid smile and he looks away before you can even smile back. 

Forcing yourself to look away, you rejoin the conversation that follows but Jungkook takes a seat on the futon on the far end of the room where your back is turned to him.

The next half hour passes in conversation about the plans for tonight; what everyone’s wearing and the weather for tomorrow. With it being summer, the sun is really sun-ing and it’s been perfect. A bit unbearable at times but it’s nothing a portable fan and some shade couldn’t help. 

Soon, the clock turns closer to 2pm and you know you ought to start getting ready, as does everyone else since dinner is at 7 sharp tonight. The room starts to empty and you decide to head up too. This way, you can squeeze in a nice nap and have enough time to get ready too. 

As you get up from the table, you notice that Jungkook is no longer in the room but you don’t think about it. Maybe after the wedding, you’ll get a chance to speak to him about everything that’s happened between you guys but for now at least, you decide to focus your efforts on Alex and Thalia. 

Sophia is still conked out when you get upstairs to her room but you wake her up knowing she’ll want time to freshen up before she needs to start getting ready. Groggily, she sits up in bed and frowns when she sees you back in your pyjamas. 

“I’m taking a nap,” you say, answering her question prematurely. “Wake me up in an hour please.”

“Sure,” she croaks, reaching for her stanley. 

As she sips on the water slowly, still sitting up in a sleepy haze, you get comfortable beside her and ask Alexa to play some white noise to help drown out everything else. As always, it works like a charm and you’re fast asleep after only a few moments. 

“Wine.” Mrs Cirillo glances around, eyes narrowing as she looks at the tables. “We need wine.”

“Are you sure, mom?” Sophia asks, looking around. “There’s plenty to serve already.”

“Sweetheart, have you forgotten what guests we’re serving? There’s lots of family coming too.”

“Oh, right,” Sophia nods. “It’s been a slow day, mom.”

Mr Cirillo isn’t paying attention though, still looking around and she counts something under her breath before releasing a sigh with a frown. “I definitely ordered wine too, where is it?” She pulls out her phone. “Have either of you seen Charlie?”

“Charlie?” you ask. 

“He’s the guy in charge of the catering,” Sophia answers for you before answering her mom. “Last I saw he was in the kitchen checking on the canapés, and mom I saw some crates when I was coming down earlier, maybe they’re still there?”

“Would you mind checking, darling? And please ask someone to bring them over if they are?” Mrs Cirillo says, still scrolling through her phone and looking concerned. 

You’re sure there’s still 101 other things she’s worried about right now since guests are supposed to be arriving any moment and the wine is just one of those problems. It probably would have been easier if this was a more traditional rehearsal dinner but considering the majority of the guests are from out-of-town, the families thought it discourteous not to invite them tonight.

“We can bring them,” you offer, getting up from your seat. 

“Oh, thank you, Y/N. Yes girls, if you could please it would be amazing.” She looks around once more but you can only see the house guests scattered around and no catering or even decor staff in sight. “Actually, find Alias” she says, looking back with a nod. “He can do it, I’m sure he’s in the kitchen stuffing his face anyway.”

“Sure, mom,” Sophia says, getting up with you. “Let us know if you need anything else.”

“Thank you girls,” she answers, attention returning to her phone as you both walk back towards the path that goes around the house to the front. 

“I’m calling Alias,” Sophia says, pulling her phone out of her purse. “That doofus is around her somewhere.”

“I think the kitchen probably is our best shot but let’s find the wine first.”

“I’m gonna kill him when I see him though, he should be here already.”

“I’m sure he is,” you laugh, “he was down here two hours ago helping with everything.”

“Still, he knows how stressed mom gets.”

Just as you come around the corner towards the driveway, you spot Alias, sleeves rolled up and helping some of the caterers already. 

“Yep, he does,” you answer as you and Sophia come to a pause. 

Sophia just shrugs. “It’s the least that’s expected of him.”

“Fair enough,” you shrug too. 

You know if Alias was getting married, Alex certainly would’ve been front and centre making sure everything was prepared and perfect for his brother's big day and Alias doing the same is, as Sophia put it, the least that’s expected of him.

Taking a crate of wine from one of the caterers unloading the van, Alias turns and smiles when he sees you both approaching. “Hey, Y/N, and hello princess,” he greets his sister as you both approach. “You finally decided to help.”

“It takes time to look this good,” Sophia says with a tut. 

“This is supposed to be good?” Alias teases his little sister. 

She simply rolls her eyes, taking a crate herself and you take one too being extra careful with the fairly heavy load. “Just take that inside. The guests are supposed to be here and mom is gonna freak if the wine isn’t sorted.”

“Yeah, caterers were running late but I’ve got some of the guys helping out here and there.”

Right on cue, Jungkook comes strolling out of the house and just like Alias, his sleeves are rolled up too. Why is he so damn good looking? You must really miss him because seeing him now has you feeling a desperate longing to at least just speak to him. 

He gives a small smile as he comes out but he could just as easily be looking at Sophia or Alias who are both standing right in front of you. 

“Good,” Sophia nods before glancing back at you. She purses her lips and looks back at Alias. “Come on then,” she says, brows raised. I’ll go check on the kitchen if they were all late.”

Without a word, Alias follows and suddenly it’s just you and Jungkook standing still in between the rush of a few panicked catering staff. 

Now you’re certain he’s looking right at you and just like that, you can hear your heart beating in your chest. It’s that cursed Jungkook Effect again but this time it feels worse.

“Hey,” he steps forward, smiling hesitantly.

“Hi,” you answer. Consciously, you try to smile but your nerves seem to be running high. Gosh, you hate this. Jungkook is your best friend, it shouldn’t feel like this. 

Jungkook steps forward again, walking until all that separates you is the crate you’re holding. You don’t miss the way his gaze skims your figure, looking back at your face by the time he’s in front of you. “Let me take that?” He asks it as a question but takes the heavy wooden box from you anyway, it’s one effortless motion and you feel his fingers brush yours as he does. 

He’s looking at you carefully, searching for any clues he can use to dissect how you’re feeling. It makes you self-conscious even though you know Jungkook never has a bad word to say about you, but still, you have so much more to lose now and you’re already at a loss. 

“Thanks,” you smile, unable to look away from him despite how you’re feeling. You really have missed him and the past few days have proven to you just how much. 

For a moment, neither of you say anything – a thousand unspoken words pass your mind and you feel your pulse rising, ushering you to say something but what? You wouldn’t know where to start, even though you know you want to say something. Anything.

“You look beautiful.” Jungkook’s gaze remains rooted on you as he says it, soft and sure.

Releasing a small breath – perhaps one of relief – you smile. “Thank you.” And just like that, your pulse slows down, your nerves subside and you’re calm. 

Focused entirely on you, Jungkook notices the change and reciprocates. His lips curl into a smile, not so big but enough for it to reach his eyes but it’s familiar to you and it’s unexpectedly comforting.“You’re welcome,” he says.

The train of thought in your mind slows down and something about the way Jungkook is looking at you now tells you everything is going to be okay. This must be why, you think, feeling all your worries melt away – it’s no surprise that you’re in love with him, with the way he’s looking at you now, you wonder if he’s always looked at you with this much care and adoration.

For the first time, you see Alex’s point and now you think, was he right?

As though he can read your thoughts, Jungkook’s expression changes and he says your name, pausing with bated breath.

“Yes?”

“Can we talk?”

Suddenly, you’re flustered. “Well, yes, I–now?”

“Um…” Jungkook turns around, looking at the hurried staff and back at the house. “Later,” he says, looking back at you. “After dinner?”

You nod. “Sure.”

“Okay.” He nods too, smiling. “I should probably take this inside now,” he says, still not looking away from you. “But I’ll see you later.”

Again, you nod, and this time you can’t help but laugh, feeling so relieved that things feel more normal than before. His smile grows when he hears you laugh, and he nods once more before turning away and walking back into the house.

“Thank you all for coming tonight and please enjoy the rest of the evening!”

A loud echo of cheers and conversation follows after Mr Cirillo closes off the final speech, with you and your friends included, all raising your glasses before taking a sip of your champagne.

“I can’t believe my baby brother’s getting married,” Alias says, having already emptied his glass. A flute of champagne is a mere two sips to him at most. 

“Feeling sentimental big brother?” Sophia asks, smiling.

“You know what? I think I am,” he says, turning to her with a smile. “You better not be next, I’m not ready for you, okay?”

She laughs. “I’m not even dating anyone.”

“Good, keep it that way.” He looks ahead again but puts his arm around his little sister and kisses her forehead. 

Neither of them say a word but Sophia lets him pull her in, a grimacing smile on her face. As siblings, the Cirillo’s are rarely physically affectionate with each other, especially these two, so it warms your heart to see it. 

“Seems you're not the only one feeling sentimental.” Sophia points at their mom who is hugging Thalia and wiping away a few tears as Alex laughs, no doubt teasing his mom. 

“Alright, they're not married yet so no tears tonight guys…” Alias looks at you guys and you all agree. 

You look around the table and at Jungkook who sits a few seats away from you on the round table, noticing how he seems so much brighter than before. He looks your way too and you exchange smiles, still timid but no longer anxious.

Just then, ABBA plays loud on the speakers and Alias is ushering everyone up and to the dance floor. 

“Okay, hang on,” you laugh as he drags you out. “I need to pee!”

You feel a little bit tipsy having had a few to drink now but Alias holds you and pulls you onto the dance floor. Sophia and Jungkook are right there behind you, as well as Kelce, Shay, Elisa and some of the others. Sophia takes your hand as the pre chorus starts and you all belt out the lines in unison.

There’s not a soul out there, no one to hear my prayers! Gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight Won't somebody help me chase the shadows away?!

You get carried away with the chorus, dancing and spinning along as you always do, and just when the chorus plays, Alias takes a hold of you as you dance, swaying you together left and right while you laugh gleefully. Laughing with you, he then not so subtly twirls you in the direction of Jungkook and with a little push, you end up bumping into his chest.

He looks down at you, smiling wide. Still mid-sentence of the song, you laugh and he joins you as you finish the chorus. As the music slows into the next verse, Your friends are still singing and dancing but now, you can only focus on the feeling of Jungkook holding you, one hand on your lower back and the other on your arm. 

You know it must be the lights around you but the way his eyes twinkle have you feeling weak in the knees. With a smile still gracing his lips, he tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ears and that’s all it takes for you to feel shy. It would feel silly if the context were different but then his gaze drops to your lips for a second and you suddenly feel butterflies in your tummy as he locks eyes with you again. 

The moment is brief and from next to you, your friends start to shout out the lines again and Jungkook and you join in. You feel his hand let go of your arm and as you step to the side, one stays on your lower back but only for a moment.

Sophia catches your eye immediately and grins knowingly before she nods in the direction of the house. You know what she means and as the song comes to an end and the next one starts, you excuse yourself. 

“Hey!” Alias calls over the loud music. ”This is your favourite, where are you going?!” 

“It’s not mine, it’s my dads,” you laugh.

“Ah, yeah.” Alias, nods, undoubtedly remembering your dad’s 45th birthday party. “Let me find him,” he grins, walking off in the opposite direction.

Jungkook is looking your way as he dances with Dillon and Shay, and you smile before following Sophia as she tugs your hand again.

Many people have had more than a few glasses of wine so you have to excuse yourself as lots of guests bump into you, no doubt enjoying the evening as much as you are.

“What was that?!” Sophia asks excitedly as you both walk up towards the house.

“I don't even know,” you say. Still giddy from all the excitement. 

“Has he spoken to you yet?”

“Not yet. He said he would after the party, so I guess I'll just wait for him to come to me.”

“Well, he totally looked like he was gonna kiss you.”

“Sophia!”

“What?” She laughs. “We all know he wants to.”

“Actually we don’t,” you say, somewhat soberly. 

It’s true, he said he wants to talk to you but he didn’t say what about. It feels easy to be hopeful that he's going to say what you want him to say and Sophia isn’t wrong – he did look like he wanted to kiss you back there, but still, there’s something stopping you from feeling hopeful.

“Oh, come on, this is the moment we've all been waiting for,” she says excitedly, squeezing your arm.

“Maybe,” you laugh, trying your best to push it to the back of your mind. “But let’s just focus on tonight and make sure you drink some water please.”

‘Oh yeah,” she nods, “can’t be looking glum for tomorrow!” 

“No, you can’t.”

She sighs, stopping outside the main bathroom on the ground floor, one of many in the grand estate. “Okay, go, I’m gonna go upstairs.”

“Okay.”

After a moment, you’re drying your hands and stepping out of the bathroom. Sophia’s still not here so you walk towards the staircase just around the corner. Just as you do, she comes down, adjusting her dress as she walks. 

“You look lovely,” you reassure her.

“Thanks, boo,” she says, jumping down the last two steps now that she's exchanged her heels for flats.

“Ooh, wait.” You hold her still as you fix her hair parting for her, carefully moving it back to where she initially styled it… 

“She’s not here tonight but she’ll be here tomorrow, of course.” Two quiet voices grow louder as they probably walk in the direction of the loo.

“I wonder if they’ll announce themselves as a couple. Jungkook has always seemed to be the more private type.”

Hearing Jungkook’s name makes you pause and Sophia frowns at you but her question is answered as the conversation outside is continued, and she too, goes still as she listens.

“Well, yes, Jungkook is private, but Valentina? She would announce it to everyone if she could.”

What?

“Ah, yes, it’ll probably be all over their social media pages, whatever it is they’re using today.”

“Instagram I believe. In fact, she’s probably already published something. With the way they were kissing for all the world to see as she took him up to her room.”

Your heart drops.

“Oh, I heard, Josepehine said she walked past them as they went into her room and she had no shame, even laughing in front of her as pulled his tie off.”

Now you start to feel sick and the anxiety comes rushing in.

“Kids these days, so different from us.”

“I remember I had to hide it from my parents for months!”

“And they still caught you, ha!”

Together, whoever they are laugh and their voices grow more distant as they pass by.

Sophia’s expression has dropped and she whispers your name.

You stare at her blankly, still processing what you’ve just heard. 

“Hey,” Sophia says hushedly, taking your arms, “they don’t know what they’re talking about.” She looks around the corner before looking back at you. “It was just Mrs Morgan and her friend, they’re stupid and love to gossip about anything.”

You can tell she’s trying her best to make you feel better but it won’t work.

“You know what they’re like, they get a tiny hint at anything and they run with it, it’s not true–”

“It is.” Your voice sounds hopeless, even to you.

Sophia pauses, confusion written all over her face. “What?”

“I’m sure of it.” You look up at her, the memory coming back to you. 

You were at the party and Alias told you Jungkook was downstairs at the lounge where you'd seen Valentina kissing some guy in the elevator. When Alias told you Jungkook was last at the lounge around the same time, you thought of the possibility then but stopped yourself because how could it be? You could almost laugh at yourself now you’ve heard it from someone else – it must've been true because Jungkook didn't show up once that night, nor did Valentina after you saw her.

Relaying the memory of the night to Sophia in somewhat of a haze thanks to the drinks you’ve had, she simply stares at you for a few seconds before shaking her head.

“No, that doesn't mean anything, Y/N.” She says it so surely and you want to believe her.

“But it would make sense.”

“No, well yes, but even then, actually no,” she says, conflicted, before taking your hands again. “Look, it can't make sense because there is no way Jungkook slept with Val, he’s in love with you.”

You wish you could believe it, especially because you want to. She’s right that it makes no sense and that's considering Jungkook’s character alone – he wouldn’t do that, not to himself and not to you. But right now, tonight of all nights, you don’t want to think about it.

“Let’s get a drink,” you mumble, taking her hand and walking back towards the party.

She follows but her concern remains. “I’ll go talk to him, I know it’s not true–”

“No, not tonight,” you say, shaking your head. “Let’s just focus on the wedding, okay?”

She hesitates before giving in. “Okay, fine.” 

It’s a quiet walk back to the garden but Sophia takes you through the house towards the kitchen to get you a drink and then to the path that leads to the poolhouse, avoiding the party. You can still see everything as you walk and you catch a sight of Jungkoook and Alias dancing together. There’s a happy smile on Jungkook’s face that makes you feel a deep sense of longing and just like that, everything hurts again.

Tearing your eyes away from the scene, you keep walking and stop with Sophia by the sunbeds. You sit down, putting your purse next to you as you take a big sip of your drink and she sits in front of you, watching you. “I don’t want to believe it,” you say quietly, after a moment.

“Then don’t. I know I don’t.”

You look at her and see she means it. Tears well unbidden in your eyes and you have to take a deep breath and look up at the night sky to compose yourself. You absolutely refuse to cry any more – it’s stupid and annoying that things keep going in circles like this.

“Oh, Y/N, babe. “ Sophia pulls out some tissue from her purse to give to you and you use them to carefully get rid of the tears.

With another deep breath, you look back at her. “I’m fine, this is all just stupid.”

Just as she’s about to comfort you again, two giggling voices come out of the pool house and you look up to see Alex and Thalia, holding arms and cooing each other as smitten as ever as they walk out.

“Heeey!” Alex calls happily as he sees you both but he halts almost immediately, noticing that you’re not okay. “Hey,” he says again, now with much worry and confusion in his voice as he comes and sits next to you.

Thalia shares the same expression as her fiance and she sits on your other side. “What happened?”

You feel stupid and annoyed at yourself now. The last thing you want is to worry the bride and groom the night before their big day but you also know that they won’t let up now that they’ve seen you. Wordlessly, you look at Sophia and she tells them in a short summary what you just heard.

“I don’t believe it,” Alex says as surely as his sister did.

Thalia takes your hand. “Neither do I. Do you?”

“I don’t know,” you answer honestly.

They all stay quiet for a moment and all you can hear is the music closeby, with your favourite song now playing. You wonder if Jungkook is looking for you, having always known you love to dance when it comes on.

Then Alex gets up. “I’m gonna ask him.”

You get up straight away. “No, please don’t.” You look back at Thalia too. “It’s the night before your wedding, I don’t want to think about it, we can deal with it after.” You look back at Alex. “Please.”

He sighs and Thalia squeezes your hand. “Of course,” she says, reassuring you as you sit back down. In doing so, you miss the look that Alex gives Sophia and the silent exchange that the two siblings share as she nods her head in the direction of the party.

“Alright, but I’ll get you another drink,” he says.

Mindlessly, you nod, too distracted to realise that your glass is still half full. As he walks off, Sophia moves next to you too.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Thalia asks, rubbing your back soothingly.

“Not really,” you say. “I don’t think I should even be upset over it, it’s completely one-sided and he never said anything for me to believe otherwise.”

Thalia is about to say something and you’re sure she’s about to use the same argument that Sophia gave earlier – he’s in love with you so he wouldn’t sleep with someone else – but she stops herself and you’re kinda grateful for it. You don’t need to hear that he loves you when he hasn’t even said it to himself. 

The look on his face when you danced together returns to your mind and you feel your chest tighten. You really thought that was the look of someone in love but you must’ve been wrong.

“You’re allowed to be upset,” Sophia says, “but don’t be until you know what actually happened.”

Quietly, you sigh.

“She’s right,” Thalia agrees. “I know what you heard makes sense to you but it’s not something Jungkook would do.”

“I know,” you exhale, confused and now tired. “But how could I know for sure? He’s barely been talking to me since that night with Lawrence.”

“True,” Sophia nods. “That’s kind of silly of him.”

“Right?” you say, feeling a multitude of emotions now. “And even then, I did try to make things okay but he wasn’t listening to me.”

“You mean when he kept saying you should go out with Lawrence?”

“Yeah, like, why would he not just listen to me?!” you ask, now adding irritated and exasperated to your exhaustive list of emotions.

“True,” Sophia agrees. “Honestly, guys are just dumb.”

“They are,” Thalia agrees. “And truthfully,” she adds, glancing at you. “They’re even more dumb when they’re in love.”

You look at her as Sophia just hums in approval. “Whatever,” you sigh, shaking your head. “Thanks guys but I’m just not gonna think about it until after tomorrow.” You smile at them.

Although they can see right through you, they don’t press it further.

“You still wanna dance?” Sophia asks, a playful lilt to her voice as she nudges you.

You’re about to say no but the last thing you wanna do is be the reason your friends don’t have fun tonight. Sophia is the groom’s sister but she’s also your best friend and you know if you choose to retire she would join you so you don’t have to be alone, and Thalia would worry about you all night too.

“Sure,” you nod with a bigger smile. “But another drink first,” you say, downing what’s left in your glass now that the blissful effects of your previous drinks seem to have worn off.

Sophia laughs, getting up. “Of course.” 

Together, you walk back up the path, Sophia changing the subject to what Thalia was doing with Alex in the pool house.

“We didn’t do anything,” she laughs. “We just wanted some alone time.”

“You’re about to marry the guy, that’s the rest of your life with him.”

Thalia smiles. “Still couldn’t be enough.”

Sophia laughs. “Okay, I don’t know whether to be cringed out because that was actually cute.”

“It is cute. I’ve put it in my vows too actually,” Thalia says, proud.

“I can’t wait to hear them,” you tell her. “I’ll probably cry too.”

“Not more than my brother,” Sophia says. “Alex almost cried seeing you today, Thalia.”

“He told me, but honestly I think I’ll be crying myself, I just hope I don’t ruin my makeup.”

“Who did you book for it?” you ask.

The conversation shifts to makeup artists and hair stylists as you all take a few more drinks and together make your way over to the dessert table. You don’t have much of an appetite so you’re about to reapply some lip gloss only to realise you left your purse on the sunbed.

“You want some, Y/N?” Thalia holds out a plate for you but you decline.

“I’m alright, I’m just gonna go get my purse, guys, I left it on the sunbed.”

Sophia looks back at you as she takes a macaron. “Want me to come with?”

“No, all good, I’ll be back in a minute,” you say, already walking off in the opposite direction, past the crowd surrounding the desserts table and onto the path that leads away from the party.

“Tell me it’s not true.”

Alex’s voice is the first thing Jungkook hears before he even turns around.

“Hey,” he smiles, holding out the drink he’d just picked up for himself, only to frown when he sees his friend's expression.

“Please.”

Jungkook has only seen Alex annoyed a handful of times over their decade long friendship and right now, Alex looks pretty close to being annoyed. “What are you talking about?” he asks, concerned.

Alex glances around. There’s no one nearby who could overhear since they’re standing at a drinks table close to the house with only servers around, but Jungkook moves himself anyway.

Putting his glass down, he walks away from the table and Alex walks with him. After a few yards when there’s definitely no one in earshot, Alex stops.

“On the cruise,” he starts, looking straight at his friend. “Did you sleep with Valentina?”

Jungkook looks startled and equally offended. “What? Of course not!” he answers immediately, now with increasing concern.

Alex shares the same concern, evident in his tone. “Then why do people think you did?!”

“I don’t know! Where is this coming from?!”

“Some of the other guests were talking about it.”

“Which guests? How would they know anything and why would they lie?!”

“I don’t know,” Alex sighs, shaking his head. “They must be confused.”

“How did you hear it? Who said it? I can talk to them,” Jungkoook says, already looking around at the people scattered across the expanse of the garden.  

Alex pauses, biting his lip. “Sophia overheard them.”

Jungkook goes still. That means… “And… has Y/N…?”

Alex nods, lips pursed before Jungkook even finishes his sentence. “They were together.”

Jungkook stares at his friend completely confused as a hundred thoughts race through his mind – all of them stop at you. “Fuck,” he sighs. “Did she believe it?”

“I’m not sure, but she said she saw Valentina in the lounge, kissing someone going into the elevator. She couldn't see their face and then a few hours later, she was looking for you and some of the guys told her you were in the lounge… the same time–”

“The same time she saw Valentina,” Jungkook exhales slowly, feeling deflated. “I keep fucking up,” he says quietly after a moment. “I should’ve just told her the truth.”

“Which is?” Alex asks, despite already knowing the answer.

Jungkook finds a small smile on his lips even given the direness of the situation. “I love her.” He says it once and then smiles a bit wider.

Alex finds himself suddenly grinning. “I knew it.”

Jungkook chuckles. “Was I that obvious?”

“To everyone but her, my friend.” Alex looks at Jungkook, brows raised.

Just like that, Jungkook knows what he needs to do. “Help me find her.”

You’re grateful you’re only wearing kitten heels as you walk along the path but it would’ve been a better idea to change into flats like Sophia did, especially since tomorrow you’ll be in high heels for the better portion of the day. 

“Y/N!” 

Someone calls your name and you pause, turning around.

It’s Jungkook. He’s jogging to catch up with you from the rest of the party. He must be coming to talk to you now that the night is coming to an end soon. Given how fast he is, it’s only a few short seconds before he’s in front of you, breathing a bit faster but not out of breath thanks to his perfect stamina.

You don’t know how you should be feeling right now. A part of you is angry at him for everything that has happened – you didn’t ask to start a fake relationship with him only for him to be the one to tell the truth about it because he thought you should be talking to Lawrence instead. And sure, you agreed to the fake relationship, but you’re not the reason for everything that came after and even though Jungkook had good intentions, he did disregard your feelings when you told him multiple times that you don’t like Lawrence romantically at all anymore. Sure, he couldn’t know it was because you have feelings for him instead, but that doesn't mean it was justified.

Another part of you just wants to have things go back to how they were because you really do miss your best friend and there’s nothing more you want than to have him back.

Then there’s the part of you that wonders if he really slept with Valentina. You could believe it, it all adds up and despite how unreliable the source is, you did see Valentina with someone, who now when you think about it, looked very much like Jungkook. The thought of it makes your stomach churn.

“Jungkook, I don’t wanna talk right now,” you mutter, turning away. 

“Wait, I really–”

“What?” you say, turning abruptly and stopping Jungkook from reaching for you. Immediately, you recoil, feeling bad. “Sorry.” You didn’t mean for it to come out like that.

“It’s okay,” Jungkook says, now hesitating.

The look on his face makes you feel even worse than before and you swallow hard. You’re still mad at him so without another word, you turn and walk away, and this time, Jungkook doesn’t stop you. With every step you take a deep breath and calm yourself down, and then–

“Do you honestly believe it?”

You stop in your tracks. Slowly, you turn around. “What?”

He watches you carefully. “Do you really believe it? That I–,” he pauses, sighing. “That I slept with Valentina?” 

You notice that he sounds hurt that it’s something he even has to ask you, and still, hearing it from him hurts far more. “What else am I supposed to believe?” you ask, feeling your walls crumbling but your tone remains rather defensive. “You never said anything otherwise.”

After your many years of friendship, Jungkook knows you and he knows that right now, you’re mad at him but you just need an answer. He knows you have every right to be annoyed at him because he hasn’t been honest with you about anything and it’s because of him that all of this happened in the first place.

“I’m telling you now,” he says, taking a step forward. “It’s not true.” He sees your expression flicker but nothing more. “Nothing happened, I literally spoke with her for five minutes that night before she went back to her room with some other guy.”

Relief — that’s the first thing you feel as you exhale a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. “Okay?” You shrug, suddenly not sure what to say or do now he’s revealed the truth – you didn’t think this far ahead, having only thought of the worst. “Good for you,” you carry on, crossing your arms. “I don’t care anyway.”

“Yes you do,” Jungkook says, plain as day.

You flare, albeit lightly. 

Traces of a smile appear on his face and he carries on. “You do care,” he says, stepping forward slowly, this time without stopping. “And I’m sorry you had to hear it how you did, I know I’d feel shit if I heard the same thing about you.”

What? You’re trying to figure it out – does he know?

Jungkook sighs, smile growing and he stops close to you. You almost step back but stop yourself. He looks down at you with a familiar adoration in his expression.

Softly, he says your name. “You’ve been my best friend for years now, how long has it been since I’ve even looked at anyone else, yet alone slept with them?”

Saying nothing, you shake your head with a small shrug. A long time.

“Heck, I don’t even know myself,” Jungkook laughs softly. “All I know is that for me, my attention was always somewhere else.” 

Your head tilts, brows creasing just slightly. “What are you saying?” you ask, feeling your heart rate speed up as you wait for the answer you want more than anything to hear.

Jungkook’s eyes roam your face for a second, the smile still carved on his lips and he exhales. “I’m in love with you.” You feel his fingers curl around your palms as he takes your hands. “I’m in love with you and I have been for a long time, longer than I even know.”

You say nothing, lips parted as though you want to but nothing comes out as no complete thoughts form in your head. You just feel your heart hammering in your chest and a fuzzy wave of warmth rushes ripples through you.

“I…”

“You don’t have to say anything now,” he says, “I just had to tell you, and again, I'm sorry.”

You’re grateful that you’re standing close enough to the dance floor because if it weren't for the music playing you're sure he would be able to hear how loud your heart is beating in your chest.

“Y/N!” Another voice calls your name from close by. It’s your mom. 

Jungkook turns around, letting go of your hands and she waves when she sees you, smiling as she approaches. “Darling, come take a photo with your father and I,” she grins, completely unaware she’s interrupting anything. “Jungkook, you look dashing,” she smiles at him as she takes your hand. “Nice to see you two have made up from whatever you were arguing about too,” she says, looking at you in question but she doesn't wait for a response from him. Her giddiness tells you she’s had more than her usual liquor intake.

Still reeling from what Jungkook just told you, you just nod and follow wordlessly as she pulls you towards your dad.

“Ah, there she is, my beautiful daughter,” he beams, “come here.”

You wish you could be more present as your parents share a sweet moment of appreciation for you, but you just smile and nod, hugging and kissing them in return as you all take a bunch of selfies together. Your smile is genuine enough though, Jungkook’s confession replaying over and over in your head as it becomes more real.

He loves me.

“Mom, dad,” you say, interrupting them both as they play around with some filters. 

“Yes, honey,” they respond in unison, still slightly distracted.

“Um… Jungkook told me he loves me.”

Both your parents' heads snap up together and you see the biggest smile on your moms face and a look of pure surprise on your dads.

“That kid finally did it,” you hear him say quietly to himself as his expression changes to a smile.

“He did?” your mom cries excitedly, squeezing your arm. “What did you say?”

“Well, you called me then to come here–”

“What?” your dad interrupts, disappointed. “Oh, honey, we’re sorry.”

“It’s okay, I can find him now, but dad…” you frown, thinking about what he just said to himself. “Did you know?”

Your dad shrugs with a smirk. “I had a feeling. A strong one.” He nods in your moms direction and she smiles proudly. “Your mom did too.”

You can't help but laugh. “Everyone apart from me it seems.”

“Well go find him now then,” your mom ushers.”Want me to help you?”

“It’s okay.” Getting up, you kiss both of their cheeks before turning away to go and find Jungkook.

Many of the guests have returned to their hotels or homes now and it’s much easier to find someone from across the garden. As you get closer to the house, you see Thalia and Sophia sitting on the veranda and they grin when they see you coming.

“So,” Thalia says as they sit on the seats in front of you. “Jungkook found you?”

You look at her and Sophia, unable to contain your happiness. “He said loves me,” you say out loud.

They look surprised for a split second before squealing in excitement.

“He finally told you?” 

“This is so exciting”

“Mhm,” you nod, laughing. You’re sure they must’ve already heard it from Jungkook first, given their expressions when you approached, but you appreciate their excitement nonetheless.

“What did you say?”

“I didn’t.” I should have. “My mom came.” 

“Oh.” Their expressions have dropped ever so slightly and you feel it.

“I should have, right?”

“Well, maybe something but your mom came so it's fine,” Sophia says. “Find him now.”

You’re just about to spring into action when THalia stops you.

“The guys have all gone upstairs, Jungkook too,” she says, frowning apologetically. “We’re not supposed to see any of them until the ceremony tomorrow.”

“That's a family tradition,” Sophia says, waving her hand. “But we have an exception here.” 

You wish more than anything to see Jungkook now but you also don't want to disrespect their family – you know the kids won't mind but perhaps Mr and Mrs Cirillo, and Thalia’s parents.

“No, it's fine,” you say, smiling reassuringly. “It's just one day, and at least I know the truth now.”

“Fair enough,” they agree.

“Wow, we might have another wedding again next year now,” Sophia grins, winking at you.

You laugh, feeling a wave of joy as you lean back into the cushions and tell the girls exactly how your conversation with Jungkook went. 

“You may now kiss the bride.”

Laughter and cheer erupts around you as Alex ever so sweetly kisses his bride, cheeks cupped in his hands. It’s a lingering kiss, a sweet one and it has your heart about to burst with joy. 

Across from you, Jungkook is laughing too, cheering for his best friend and he catches your eye for the nth time now and grins, making you smile even wider.

As the bride and groom depart for their photographs, Sophia drags you to the bar and you both get a drink while recapping the events of the morning and then she gets summoned away for the family photos which must mean that the groomsmen are done with their pictures too.

“I’ll come with you.”

“Of course you will,” she laughs, knowingly. “Does this mean you're finally gonna tell him you love him too?”

“I think so,” you grin. “As long as I don't chicken out.”

“You better not, otherwise I’ll tell him for you.”

“Don't worry. I don't think I will.”

“Well definitely not, I know you're so gonna get laid tonight.”

“Hey” you laugh. “I mean it would be nice but I don't care either way.”

“That's sweet, she says, “but please, don't be coy. After all this waiting it would be an injustice to not get laid.”

Suppressing a laugh, you nod. “Okay, noted.”

As you approach the quiet gardens, you spot some of the other groomsmen, Alias included, but not Jungkook. Alias sees you and answers your question before you can even ask it. “He went to look for you.”

Ah,” you nod. “Thanks.”

Saying a temporary goodbye, you walk in the opposite direction away from the gardens and back towards the venue. It's so beautiful here with tall oak trees spread across the lush and perfectly manicured grounds surrounding the elegant mansion. You’re momentarily distracted by the views that you don't notice jungkook as he walks out from around the mansion, smiling as he approaches. 

When you do spot him, he’s stopped in the path ahead of the fountain, holding his own bouquet of flowers in front of his chest. Smiling, you approach him slowly. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he says, unable to fight back his smile.

You stop in front of him, as close as he was to you yesterday and gaze at him.

“You look beautiful,” he says quietly. “Again. You look beautiful everyday,” he adds with a shake of his head.

“Thank you. You look pretty handsome today too.”

“Thanks.” He looks down shyly, lowering the bouquet. “These are for you.”

Looking down at the bouquet, it’s full and in bloom of all your favourite flowers and you know that’s not a coincidence. “They’re lovely.” Taking them from him, you admire them a little longer before looking back up. 

“I'm glad you like them. He takes them back from you and places them on the bench beside you. 

You’re confused for a second but when he turns back, he wraps both arms around your waist and pulls you into him, head burying into your neck. Muscle memory serves you well as you melt into his embrace, his scent engulfing you as your arms wrap around his neck as his chest presses flush against you.

He hums softly and you reckon you could stay here forever. Now you wonder, how did you never realise you were in love with him? Why did it take all of this unnecessary awkwardness and distance for you to know why you’ve always been so unavailable to others? Jungkook has always been the one person whose company you've craved when no matter what the occasion and the only one who really feels like home.

“I missed you,” you murmur, fingers gently moving across his neck as you move.

He keeps you close, arms tight around you. “I know, me too.” His eyes dip to your lips.

“Let's never do that again.”

“Agreed,” he nods, smiling with a wince. “Even though I know it was really my fault.”

“Oh, 100%” you say, feeling the space between you grow smaller and smaller. “All your fault.”

Now, you're looking at his lips.

Jungkook notices and he moves his hand up, slowly sweeping your neck until he’s cupping your cheek in his broad palm, the other arm still holding you tight. He smiles ever so slightly, and when you look up, you can see he’s waiting for something for you. So you nod, and that's all he needs.

He closes the space between you, lips meeting yours in a gentle brush once. Lips parted, you pull away briefly, moving your hand up to cradle his jaw before leaning in again for a more deliberate kiss. He hums, softly, and returns for more, one by one getting longer and more keen. The seconds melt away into minutes and you don't quite know how long you were standing here for, you only know that it feels perfect.

“I love you,” Jungkook murmurs, pecking your lips once more, then your nose and forehead.

You squeeze your arms around his waist. “Say it again.”

He chuckles, sweeping your hair back to kiss your cheek. “I love you,” he murmurs low into your ear, hot breath warming your skin. “I love you, I love you, I love you so much, princess.”

Biting your lip, you find yourself suddenly feeling something you haven't felt in a long time, except recently that night in bed with him on the cruise – a feverish desire for more.

Holding his face in front of you, you kiss his lips. “I love you too.” 

He blinks, endearingly. “I was waiting for that.”

You sigh with an air of amused disappointment. “Why couldn't we have just realised sooner? It would have made our lives so much easier.”

“I think I always knew actually.” He takes your hand and you sit down at the bench. “At least for a long time, I knew there was something.”

“Really?”

He hums, putting his arm around you and you lean into him. “I just didn't really let myself think about it much though, I didn’t wanna change things in case you didn't feel the same, which Ii don't think you did.” he thinks out loud, honestly.

For a moment, you're quiet. “I did.”

He looks at you.

“I don't know from when, but I think I just didn't realise.” Playing with the ring on his finger, you smile. “I probably should have just listened to Alex from the start.”

“Alex?”

“Mhm,” you nod. “He’d been telling me for months that you were into me, I just didn't see it.”

“Ah,'' Jungkook nods, pink tingeing his cheeks as he looks down.

“But now we’re good,” you say, cocking your head and smiling.

“Now we’re good,” he repeats, sealing his sentence with a kiss.

The evening reception goes on late into the night, later than you expect it to. It’s 8pm by the time all the guests turn up and within the next two hours, you've gone through all the emotions thanks to a round of heartfelt speeches from all the family and friends. Alias and Sophia’s speech made you tear up the most and you didn't even dare look in a mirror knowing your makeup is probably already so far beyond repair but luckily Sophia has magic hands and has a technique to apply concealer over powder, so not all was lost.

Except now you can feel yourself tearing up again as Alex and Thalia have their first dance, gazing lovingly at each other while Etta James’ At Last plays in the background with a live band. 

“They’re so perfect together,” you murmur, leaning your head back against Jungkook’s shoulder as you watch them from a raised platform close to the band.

He wraps his arms a little tighter around your waist. “Are we perfect together?”

“Of course,” you grin, looking up at him.

He wrinkles his nose, about to lean in to kiss you when someone coughs quietly next to you. Turning around, you see Valentina with a drink in her hand, coughing again as though she was just choking.

“Are you okay?” You take her drink from her.

“Fine,” she says, waving a hand as she clears her throat and straightens up. “I was actually coming over here to congratulate you since you’ve evidently made up now and have finally realised you’re both stupid in love with each other.” 

Jungkook and you smile sheepishly.

“Then I heard you talking and gosh…” Valentina winces, although her eyes twinkle with amusement as she looks back and forth between you. “You really are disgustingly cute together.”

You let out a snort of laughter. “Thanks, Val.”

You feel Jungkook caress the small of your back. “Thanks.”

“Yeah.” She swiftly retrieves her drink from you. . “I’m glad you worked it out. See you later, guys.” She struts off, as perfect as she always is and disappears into the crowd.

The band closes off the song and everyone applauds, cheering for the happy couple.Then, the familiar melody of Elvis Presley Can't Help Falling In Love starts to play.

“Wanna dance?”

Scanning the crowd, you consider it. Mrs Cirillo is going around, inviting people to the dance floor, pulling some too. 

“I feel kinda shy.”

“What?” Jungkook steps next to you, taking your hand. “Why?”

“I don't know,” you laugh. “It’s fine, lets go.”

“You sure?” Jungkook furrows his brows. “We don't have to.”

“No, I want to,” you reassure him.

Just then, someone approaches from behind Jungkook. “Just who I wanted to see.” Mrs Cirillo is beaming as she approaches you. “I knew you two would fall in love eventually.” She takes your hands and pulls you to the centre of the dance floor. “I just don’t know why it took you so long,” she says before kissing your cheek, then Jungkook’s. “Bless you both,” she grins, before she’s off again.

“I guess we have no choice now.” You step closer to Jungkook and he pulls you in by the waist as your arms hang loosely over his neck. Neither of you say anything as the song plays, the words speaking volumes for you instead – as cheesy as it may seem.

Take my hand Take my whole life, too For I can't help falling in love with you

Fittingly, Jungkook breaks out into a cheesy smile and you both laugh. He pulls you in and together, you share your first dance as a couple. “So,” Jungkook clears his throat, “just to clarify, in case it wasn’t clear, you’re my girlfriend now.”

You feign surprise. “I am?”

Jungkook pouts his lips, his expression a mix of amusement and mock annoyance. “Don’t be mean.”

Giggling, you kiss his cheek.”Ask me nicely.”

Jungkook sighs dramatically but plays along with a smirk. “Princess, would you please do me the honour of being my girlfriend? So I can love you and spoil you forever?”

With a smug grin, you nod. “Of course.”

“Just don’t be that annoying couple who do everything together,” Alias’s voice comes from behind you. Turning around, you see Alex, Thalia and Sophia having gathered too, all wearing knowing smiles. 

“Weren’t they always that annoying couple?” Alex says, brows arching as he smiles as smug as when he first saw you and Jungkook walking into the hall together holding hands. Being the groom on his wedding day, he never got to say anything to you then, but you knew he knew as he nudged Thalia and gestured to your direction. She looked like she was about to cry when she saw you together, though you suppose she was already feeling emotional from the ceremony prior. Still, it was heartwarming to see your friends so happy for you.

“That’s true,” Thalia agrees. 

“At least this time they won’t be sulking around and pining over each other,” Sophia banters.

Alias cringes in jest. “No, instead they’ll be wearing matching pyjamas, or worse yet, slippers.”

He’s definitely referring to the matching sweaters you got for Jungkook and yourself last year – and that was before you were a couple.

“Can’t forget the His and Hers mugs,” Jungkook amuses them as they all groan playfully.

Entertained, you join in. “Oh and the keychains,” you add. “Jewellery too.”

“I’ve already ordered matching charm bracelets,” Jungkook winks.

“Alright, we’ve heard enough,” Sophia laughs.

Alias clicks his tongue. “I definitely know what you two are getting for Christmas this year.”

“But–” Sophia wags her finger between you both, “–just give us a heads up if there’s any proposals on the horizon, I can’t do another wedding cruise single.”

Alias raises a finger. “I second that.”

Jungkook takes the lead as he responds. “Will do, but don’t take too long.” He has a mischievous glint in his eye and squeezes your hand. ‘I know I’m not.”

The fact that you’re not surprised by his answer is what actually surprises you. Smiling, dazed, you simply close your eyes as he pecks your cheek.

Meanwhile, Thalia squeals, excited, as Alex pats Jungkook’s arm, laughing as he encourages him. 

His brother on the other hand, groans, though there’s a heavy tone of cheerfulness in his voice as he pretends to complain, “they’ve already started.” 

Sophia blinks, “I wish I could be grossed out but damn it, I’m not.”

If it weren't for you being on cloud nine right now, you might actually feel sorry for making your friends put up with all of this cringeness, but as it so happens, you're revelling in it. “You might wanna get used to it, guys.” You pull Jungkook in closer, returning to a slow dance as the next song plays. After exchanging a few more playful words, Jungkook and you are left alone again, dancing to the music. 

“You meant that?” you ask.

Jungkook doesn’t miss a beat. “Yes. If you’re sure you want it too.”

Gaze locked on him, you nod. “How could I not?”

As Jungkook's smile lights up, he places a soft kiss on your lips, so soft that it barely feels like it happened. Hand on the back of his neck, you push down and keep him three for another. He obliges, letting you kiss him freely for all the world to see and quite frankly, you probably forget about your surroundings a bit too soon.

“Mm, wait.” You pull back, taking a deep breath. “Let’s pause,” you say, continuing to dance along with everyone else.

Jungkook’s eyes go round. “Why? You okay?”

“Yeah, I just… um…” You press your fingers into your palm, exhaling as you look down. “I’ll want more if we keep going.” You feel slightly embarrassed as you mumble out your response but Jungkook’s immediate reply makes you look up, surprised.

“Me too.”

“Really?”

“Of course,” he chuckles, pulling in his lower lip with his teeth as he comes to a slow stop and looks at you.

“What?”

“Let's get a drink,” he says, not even waiting for you to respond. There are more people dancing now so he weaves you through them, over to the mostly empty tables. Then towards the double doors leading into the rest of the mansion.

Huffing, you try your best to keep up. “I thought we were getting a drink.”

“No, I just said that.” He continues leading you as he walks through the corridors you hadn’t previously seen.

“Where are you going, Koo?”

“I went past it somewhere,” he says, talking more to himself as he keeps walking past a few doors, peering in each one as he does.

“Where?”

“Ah.” He stops, pulling you through a door. He lets go of your hand as he goes to close the door behind him.

Looking around the dimly lit room with only a small window on the far right, you narrow your eyes in confusion. There’s tall racks with coats and hats and other items, lined up along the walls and two others in the centre of the room. A single desk and chair is in one corner, multiple tags arranged in a box amongst a few other neatly placed items of stationary. “A cloak room?” you ask, dubiously, turning around. “Why are we–”

Jungkook kisses you – hard. Hands circling your waist, he’s stepping forward until you're backed up into a wall. One hand finds your cheek, thumb caressing your cheek sweetly while he tugs on your lower lip between his teeth. 

“Oh,” you sigh out loud, now realising. “Cloak room,” you say, dumbly.

“Uh-huh,” he purrs, lips moving to your jaw. “Couldn’t help myself.”

His hot breath sends shivers down your spine, hips arching against the wall. “That-that’s totally okay.”

“You sure?” His tongue swipes just under your jaw, close to your ear, oh so delicately.

“Absolutely.” Grabbing his face, you kiss him hard again, taking pleasure in every second that passes with his lips on yours. 

Opening wider, his tongue darts across yours, the salacious act leaving you desperate for more. You deepen the kiss, fingers curling in his hair as your hips involuntarily push forward again and this time, Jungkook reciprocates, pressing hard against you so you can physically feel just how bad he wants this. His bulge gets you right where it feels good and you falter, knees going weak as one gives way.

Jungkook holds you tight, laughing softly, “That good, huh?” 

“Duh.”

He kneels down, taking your ankle and lifting your heel to his thigh. “You're so pretty,” he says, more to himself than you. He takes your shoes off, right one first, then the left. With your foot still resting on his thigh, he looks up at you, hand slowly caressing your skin as he moves towards your inner thigh.

Even without the heels, you still feel your knees going weak but it feels so good. He watches your lips part, breaths picking up as you try your best to stay patient. “Please do something, Koo.”

“Patience, princess,” he teases and you whine, prompting him to laugh. “Okay.” Acquiescing, he turns his head, placing a rousing kiss on your skin. “So soft,” he murmurs, between kisses. “So perfect.” You want him so bad. “All mine.” With every touch of his lips, his mouth inches closer to where you want him, slowly but surely. Goosebumps prickling your skin, you release short soft breaths and will yourself to be patient.

Jungkook hums, nipping you with light force. “Feel good?” His tone tells you he’s tortured by his own pace as much as you are.

“Yes.”

He looks up, eyes glazed over with a hunger for more. “Tell me what you want.” His fingers brush your sex, barely. 

“Touch me, please.” 

He brushes you again, fingers working their way over your damp underwear. “Like this?” He revels in your soft whimpers.

“More.”

In one swift motion, he pulls your underwear down and reveals everything. You don’t feel shy in the slightest, especially not with the way he’s looking at you. “So pretty.” Fingers sliding over your wet lips, he exhales before he smacks you lightly. “And all mine.”

You whine, moving your hips again to remind him of your needs and he doesn’t make you wait this time. Collecting your slick on his fingers as he moves them back and forth, he then uses his thumb to stroke your clit, the contact making your knees buckle again.

Jungkoook grabs your left leg and places it over your shoulder as he repositions himself for better access. “Such a pretty girl,” he murmurs. “Bet you taste so good as well.”

“Why don't you find out?”

“Mm, I will,” Jungkook chuckles, sliding one finger inside you. “Not just yet.”

“Oh.” Your hand falls to his shoulder, digging in hard.

He stretches you,  watching as you react. Once he’s sure you're good, he adds a second finger, stroking exactly where it feels good.

“Please don’t stop.”

He grips your thigh, holding you up well. “I won’t.” Leaning in, his mouth makes contact with your clit and you mewl under his touch. He’s slow with it first, sucking and circling lightly and you want more. Under the soft silk of your dress, your nipples harden and you reach for one, toying with yourself. Seeing this, Jungkook groans. “That's it baby, touch yourself more.”

Obeying, you pull the straps off your shoulder and let the top of your dress fall, gathering around your waist where you hold it out of Jungkook’s way. His soft moan as you touch yourself tells you he’s enjoying it and as his fingers grip you harder, he starts to flick your clit.

“Oh, that’s it.” It's all you need to feel yourself reaching an orgasm, teetering on the edge as he adjusts his pace. “Please, I’m so close.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes.”

“I wanna hear you.” He fingers you harder as his tongue works overtime to get you to come and it works — in a rippling wave, your orgasm washes over you and all you can do is moan as pleasure courses through you. Jungkook keeps you up, slowing down once the peak has passed. He withdraws his fingers and you make sure to steady your legs as he stands. “You're so hot,” he says, looking at you in complete adoration and lust.

Feeling flushed, you manage to smile. “Thanks. Now my turn, please?”

Jungkook chuckles, stepping forward. “I don't think I can be that patient, princess.” As he presses against you, you can feel him a lot more than you could before.

“Oh.”

He tilts his head, hand brushing your chin as he pulls your lips to his. You can taste yourself as he kisses you, tongue stroking yours in tandem motion while he uses his other hand to caress your breasts, moulding the soft flesh before pinching your nipples between his thumb and forefinger. It rallies up arousal for more but your first priority is him. 

“Why are your clothes still on?” You question out loud, having just now realised.

Jungkook suppresses a chuckle, lips quirking into a smile as you make quick work of his tie and shirt.

Your hands roam the expanse of his broad, muscular chest. “Much better.” You only take a moment to appreciate the tattooed eye candy before pulling him back in for another sensual kiss, driven by your desire to make him feel good now, Fingers deftly undo his zipper and within seconds, your hand is slipping past his boxers and gripping his length. The girth alone has your pussy throbbing again. Jungkook releases a low sigh, his kisses becoming more insistent as you pull his cock out of his pants and play with him. 

With a slow swipe of your thumb over his head, Jungkook moans, teeth tugging on your lips and you drag your hand up and down his length, faster each time.

“Let me have a taste, please.”

“Fuck,” he sighs. Looking at your pleading face, he agrees.

You drop to your knees in an instant, letting your dress fall entirely as you go. Without wasting any time, your mouth is on his cock, tongue swirling his red, leaking tip before you move your head. 

“You’re gonna kill me,” he says, voice strained as he looks down at your naked form below him.

Focused on his cock and eager to please, you just hum in response and keep going while he gently moves your hair back, gripping it behind you and you have to squeeze your thighs together in an attempt to ease yourself to the sound of his soft grunts and groans. As they get louder, you grip his thighs and take him as deep as you can. Despite trying not to choke, you cough a little and Jungkook moves back, pulling himself out of your mouth. 

“You good?”

“Great,” you nod, trying to go back in.

Jungkook chuckles, pulling you up before you can get there. “I can’t wait any longer.” His pupils are blown out with carnal desire but his tone is otherwise gentle and affectionate. “Can I please fuck you?”

“You don't have to ask me twice.”

He pulls a condom out of his pocket, tearing the wrapper with his teeth.

Seeing this, your brow arches. “How do you have that?”

Jungkook pauses, looking slightly embarrassed. “Alias,” he says, more in a hushed whisper.

Pursing your lips together, you refrain from laughing. “Alias?”

Jungkook nods, placing the condom on while he explains. “He gave it to me just when we got here before you guys did. He said, and I quote, if there was ever a good time to declare my love for you in its physical form, it's a wedding.”

Shaking your head, you laugh again. “He would know.”

“Oh I know,” Jungkook nods. Alias has a bit of a reputation for being a womaniser on steroids when it comes to weddings.

“I’m glad he gave it though,” you shrug, pulling Jungkook closer. 

“Me too.” His lips find yours again, starting off sweet and slow. Hands circling your waist, he lifts you and your legs wrap around him instinctively. He takes his shirt from the rack you’d flung it towards earlier and walks you towards the desk in the corner and you use the chance to tease him, breaking away to kiss his ear and nibble his lobe.

“You sure you wanna do that?” he chuckles darkly.

“Very.”

He throws his shirt down on the desk before placing you on top. “You sure?” His fingers find your sex, gliding through your cum.

Dazed, you nod.

He takes his cock in one hand and spreads your legs with the other. With a small step forward, he pushes his head into your clit and you whine, wanting more. Deliberately, he slides himself down your pussy, coating his length in your cum. 

“Koo, do something,” you plead, fingers gripping the edge of the table hard.

Unable to resist any longer, Jungkook swears under his breath, pushing himself into you in one steady motion. You gasp, feeling the entirety of him fill you up so good. Jungkook doesn't move, eyes pressed shut as he acclimatises himself to the feeling of being inside you. 

The gratifying burn from being stretched out makes you tense in anticipation. As a result, Jungkook inhales, fingers gripping your thighs harder. Opening his eyes, he looks down to see both of you joined and slowly pulls out, watching his cock glisten with your wetness. Back and forth he goes, moaning at the sight of it.

“Fuck me, properly,” you huff, growing impatient with need.

He rolls his tongue on the inside of his cheek and smirks. In one quick motion, Jungkook shoves his dick back inside of you. “Done.”

You brace yourself, moving your hands back behind you on the table and you’re right to do so. Jungkook fucks you with no inhibition, hammering your sweet spot every single time. You always knew he was good at everything — cooking, golf, rugby, gardening, fixing things, running, heck any sport, singing, even poetry when he tries — but the way he fucks you goes beyond any expectation you could’ve had. 

You can do nothing but sit there and take it, jaw slack as your legs spread wide for him. Crying out for more, he gives you what you want and takes you to orgasm. A blissful sensation ensues, heightened by the fact that you’re with Jungkook and you cry his name as you climax. Holding your trembling frame secure, he follows closely himself, coming hard and hot into the condom. 

Heavy breathing is the only sound that fills the room for a moment. You’re basking in all of Jungkook’s post-sex glory, his chest glistening with a sheen of sweat as a few strands of hair now stick to his forehead. He lowers your legs to the desk, kissing you lazily on the forehead before he pulls out and disposes the condom in the trash can under the desk. 

He takes some tissues from the box behind you and attempts to clean himself before zipping up. “You okay?”

Exhaling, you push yourself off the desk. “Never been better.” Your legs wobble as you stand and Jungkook holds you still.

“Best sex I ever had,” he says as a passing comment, helping you clean up.

And you agree. “We’re definitely doing that again.” it’s just now, you realise you’re completely naked in the middle of the cloakroom.

Jungkook is already crossing the room, picking up your dress and heels. Together, you make sure you both look presentable enough to rejoin the wedding. 

Running your fingers through his hair, a smile graces his lips involuntarily. His happiness is infectious and you grin. “Happy?”

“Words can’t even describe it. Especially with you messing my hair up like that.” His eyes twinkle with mischief.

You laugh, swatting his arm gently. "Hey, I'm going for the tousled look. It's called fashion, Jeon, look it up.

"Of course," he says, nodding sagely. "My mistake. You're clearly ahead of your time.

"Exactly!" you say, with mock seriousness. "Now, are you going to kiss me or keep critiquing my hairstyling?"

Leaning in, he places a tender kiss on your lips before his expression shifts, carrying a hint of solemnity. “I am sorry for everything that happened before though.”

“It’s fine. You already apologised. Besides, so am I.”

“You didn't do anything wrong.”

“I could’ve been more honest with you.”

“I should have been first. It’s because of me everything happened that way. If I’d been honest, you wouldn’t have been hurt in the process.”

Sighing softly, you grasp his chin with your thumb and forefinger. “But we’re here now, it happened for a reason. And honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way.”

He smiles and nods. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

6 months later.

“Finally!” Pushing the back of your earrings in, you step onto the landing. “We need to leave soon.”

Jungkook puts down his carry bag by the door, a wide grin on his face. “Are those the earrings I got you last week?”

You nod, smiling. “I’ve been so excited to wear them, they’re so perfect.”

“They’re perfect on you.” He kisses your cheek, still admiring you.

“Alright, I’ll be ready in 15 minutes.” Your dad steps in the front door, putting his own carry bag down next to Jungkook’s as he catches sight of you. “Oh, Y/N, dear, you look beautiful.”

“Thanks, dad,” you grin. “How was golf?”

“Your dad doesn’t like to lose, I’ll tell you that,” Jungkook chuckled, glancing at your dad with a playful smirk. “Although he almost beat me this time.”

“Almost being the operative word," your dad retorted with a grin, giving him a friendly pat on the shoulder.

“Yeah, He's definitely got some tricks up his sleeve.”

“Coming from you.” Your dad looks at Jungkook, definitely impressed. “You really surprised me today.”

Jungkook shrugs, a quirk to his lips. “What can I say? I’m full of surprises.” 

Their cryptic conversation goes unnoticed by you as you check you’ve got everything in your purse. “That’s fab, guys, now hurry up. We need to leave or Alex will never invite us to another party again.” 

“Alright, I’ll just put these away.” Jungkook picks up the carry bags while you rush back upstairs, having remembered to put perfume on. Watching you go, Jungkook feels a wave of nervous anticipation washing over him. He hears footsteps behind him and turns to see your mom come through the kitchen.

“Ah, there’s my beautiful wife,” your dad beams, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

She smiles and turns to Jungkook. "Excited for tonight?" she whispers, her voice filled with barely contained excitement.

Jungkook’s heart skips a beat as he nods. “She still has no idea right?” 

“Not a clue.”

“Good.”

Twenty minutes later, you’re all gathered by the front door, ready to leave as your dad sets the alarm. You step out into the driveway, met by a gust of warm evening breeze. Looking at the horizon, the warm glow of the setting sun paints the sky in hues of orange and pink, casting a serene ambiance and you feel a wave of contentment. 

Jungkook appears at your side, looking at you like he’s falling in love for the first time all over again. Smiling, you lean in and give him a kiss.

“What was that for?”

“I just love you… lots.”

Something in Jungkook’s expression shifts. “Me too.

Your hand finds his and your fingers intertwine. “Ready?”

Jungkook nods, thumb circling your bare ring finger, which, unbeknownst to you, will soon be holding the most perfect princess cut diamond as a promise of forever with him.

“Ready.”

note. thank you for reading! i really hope you liked it! ✨ please share + let me know your thoughts <3 more fics coming soon ;)

[cloudnineminusnine]

dear anon, we're on the same boat 😮‍💨

i hope you're doing good! 💖

better late than never, so here we go.

!NSFW CONTENT AHEAD NO MINORS ALLOWED!

sun wukong

"wait, wait! no need to hide from me!" he gives you a roguish smile as both his hands draw your wobbling knees away from each other preventing you from hiding yourself, curious eyes darting directly to your drenched aching core, where your fingers incessantly deepen despite the embarrassment"it's all to me, ain't it? then don't hide it, love." he makes sure that you're aware of the effect your little show has on him, rutting his hardening clothed cock against the velvety skin of your trembling thigh, prodding insistently.

there's a wildness to his thirsty eyes that hits it just right for you, nearly animalistic, blowing intense shivers all over your heated body. a promiscuous cry elapse through your swollen glistening lips as you can only thrust further between your slicked folds. his grip on your bent knees open you up even more, making it easier for your soaked fingers to dig themselves into your core. you're no longer the reasoned, composed being that he's used to have beside him, no, now you're just a tantalizing mess and you need him to see just how broken he made you to be, pleading for a pleasure only him can concede you.

witnessing the power he holds over you, he feels more than delighted, flattered at how lewd your body becomes at the mere thought of him touching you "moaning my name out like that? you're so filthy..." your teary eyes goes straight to his complacent face, fingers sinking deeper when his tongue drags slowly over his pointy teeth"i bet those tiny fingers can't reach the places i will" clumsily he takes his erection out of it's confinement, thrusting into the tightness of his own calloused hand so you have a clear proof of how much trouble you're causing him "i can do it so much better, all you gotta do is beg me to" he inhales strongly once your eyes meet, biting down his thin lip, submerged by the vicious symphony caused by your candy-like groaning in unison with the wet noises of your desperate hand drowning into your greedy hole.

"wukong!" his turgid red tip drips in desire at your pain filled call, throbbing fueled by fury when you moan wantonly "please, put it inside...- need you inside me, pretty please!" you drag your fingers out and spread your juices all over the puffy lips, opening your pussy with no shame for him to see, smiling slyly in between a lip bite while he surrenders himself promptly, rubbing his thickness at your deprived entrance. he's so big and it feels so overwhelmingly hot as the tip kisses teasingly your gaping soaked cunt.

his half lidded eyes squint a bit as he suppresses a growl "thinking about it..." faking an elaborated thought, he clears his throat "first i want you to cum from your fingers alone," he warns harshly as the swollen head slides a little inside, enough to earn a helpless sob from you "then i'll put it inside you and make you cum again, harder, filling you up so good that you'll never want anything other than my cock inside that pathetic needy cunt of yours." with a mouth full he spits his ill intentions, savoring the sight of your lovely eyes shedding fat tears as you plead him religiously to fuck you.

you're so pitiful that the mere suggestion of what he's going to do makes you cum on point, spine arching as your breath get caught, toes curling to knots, whole body vibrating as you go higher than ever, sucking in the moisty tip while you're middle orgasm, barely able to keep your legs open for him to watch you being washed by immense waves of pleasure.

hovering over your partially nude body he kisses your mouth lecherously through your orgasm, sloppy and wet, tongue all over the place as he fed his ego on your frustrated adorable whines "so obedient..." his furry hands dive into your body going straight do your silky chest so he can give a little attention to your neglected nips, until your slutty waist begs him to hold you still in place so that your hips relax. he drags his hard rock member among your folds, going back and forth in a torturing pace, mixing your fluids altogether while hitting your sensitive clit aimfully "you're ruining me, you know that?"

destined one

"keep going..." comes a plead muffled by your neck, quietly in a way that makes you twitch in desire — juices dripping all over your bottom as your hand keep going."are you feeling good, hm?" he clasps your nipples enthusiastically between the rough fingertips, planting smooches in every hickey caused to your neck by his famine mouth, almost out of his mind, messy and desperate do feel more of you, to see more of your lewd behavior.

as he presses his sturdy body against your back you can feel his hardness throbbing at the end of your spine, begging for attention. "want you inside me..." you purr mellowly, looking down to where your fingers work their way in and out of you, sloshing wet sounds growing louder just like your tender voice"it's so greedy... my fingers aren't enough to reach deeper inside, babe" his hands snakes anxiously under the fabric of your clothes, finding their way to your exposed inner thighs, separating them furthermore and exposing you completely. you mewl in surprise, fidgeting between his well built hairy arms as he kneads your ass hungrily.

"you were calling my name so beautifully..." his heavy breath fan over your ear shell, spreading chills down your back as his sharp nails scratch your sweat-glimmering skin, fingers digging against it, leaving fresh traces of his possessiveness. his voice takes over your clouded mind, coming hot against your exposed shoulder "wanna see you pleasuring yourself." there's a pout on his lips, you can tell by the spoiled tone he's using against you.

slowly scissoring your hot cave open, you mumble "you're so mean to me." turning your head to the side your moist lips brush right against his sensitive reddish ear, earning a aroused whine from him that makes your legs wobble and your digits drown further inside you. as much alluring as it is, you will have to break that bratty attitude of him."look at how wet i am... and that's all your fault." when a third finger join in with the other two he bite down on your shoulder repressing a guttural moan, the combination making your eyes roll back in pleasure. "hng... i- i can't stop thinking about you pounding me hard and deep." in between angustiated sobs you blurt out, hopeful that he would tear your remaining clothes apart and fuck you senseless against any tree.

two can play a game and he knows very well what you're setting up to him. he refuses to bite the bait, suddenly fueled by the ferocious urge to see you crying loud and clear for him as you can only try to relieve yourself by playing with you thirsty cunt. "you sly little thing, you almost got me." he whispers, licking behind your ear, bringing one of his hands to your face as his tail takes it's place wrapping around your raised thigh. he sounds much more demanding, as if something snapped inside him.

before you can fight back, two girthy fingers invade your lips, toying with your tongue and vibrating instantly as you moan shamelessly around them. at the same time he starts moving behind you, rubbing himself deliberately so you know how close he is to losing his remaining sanity. "be good to me and i shall give you what you want."

his voice shifting from soft spoken and almost bashful to that dark lust-filled tone was dangerously interesting, your pussy agrees as it grips crazily around your shaky fingers, sucking them deeper to remind you that you're on your own, that they're unable to bring more than a crescent frustration while failing at hitting your sensitive spot. you're on the verge of crying as you hopelessly suck his fingers soaked, saliva dripping from the corners of your swollen lips.

[thejeangreysummers]

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡୨୧⋆｡⋆ — bare knuckled

simon “ghost” riley (boxer au) x afab reader

— pronouns used are you, femme energy from reader

content: soft simon, former ghoap situationship mentioned, upcoming chapters will contain porn with feelings

<33 authors notes at the end!!

the boxing venue is crawling with cameras, sports reporters, and eager fans looking to be let in early. when security is shooing you away to join a crowd of lovesick teenage girls, simon’s scottish friend begins a heated exchange with security. then he extends a hand over the gate and he’s lifting you over before you can fully comprehend what’s happening.

“if ghost asks, i kept m’ hands to myself alright?” he grins at you offering a firm handshake and his name as you try to keep pace with him through the venue

before you can ask when match actually starts or where you’re headed, you’re being tugged into a dark room and the door is shut behind you.

“how’d ya feel about celebrating with cake before dinner?” simon offers pulling you into him

with a familiarity that implies you kiss in dark closets regularly, i mean he hasn’t kissed you. he’s just hovering over your mouth, leaning against the wall, and you think he’s about to reach for your ass. you’re about to step away and reach for the doorknob when you see the smile in his eyes as he flicks on the light switch that was directly behind your waist.

“i can’t believe you just pulled me into a closet, johnny’s still out there! you made tonight sound like a bar fight with witnesses��“ you huff stepping back and crossing your arms as you skim a flyer listing the hour long internationally televised match.

“needed my good luck charm.” simon is leaning against the opposite wall focused on your pretty pink lipgloss

“it’s not like i can blow on your dice or anything” you insinuated

assuming that you overplayed your hand, he walks away from you immediately. you join him leaning against the dressing room vanity as he digs though duffle his bag. he slides a black plastic case with a little skull on the front across the table. he nods toward the case and you look up at him as you hesitantly open the case containing a mouth guard with his last name.

“since you’ll have my name in your mouth eventually.” simon dared as he drapes himself over the black leather couch not meeting your gaze

as you walk towards him he begins fidgeting with his wraps, focused on the linoleum floor avoiding your face. you tilt his chin up with a gentle hand and he gazes at you with such earnest the way you’ve been flirting with him feels almost cheap.

“can i see your mouth?” your hand hovers on his collarbone

he nods, the way he swallows you’re tempted to trace your finger from his jaw down to the base of his throat. you gently tug up the seam of his mask to reveal his mouth, his cupids bow is marred with a deep scar, there’s a less shallow scar across his chin, and the traces of his stubble across his jaw are uneven. ghost looks away and you impulsively kiss the scar on his chin then pull back.

“if you don’t win tonight, i’d like to buy you dinner.” you suggested

simon’s heart swells. you didn’t come here tonight because of his track record, fame, or money. you just wanted to see him again. he wanted to give you an opportunity to pull away from the chaos of his career, his mouthy best friend, and the underlying hurt that’s carved into his face. if you were going to run, he needed to know now before he got his hopes up. your kiss was softer than he imagined, he wonders if you’re always that gentle. he can temper himself for you, treat you gently, speak to you softer, and spoil you better than any man ever could. he was going to ruin you for anyone else. he wants to leave immediately, carry you to the car before you can change your mind. price would wring his neck and a riot would ensue if he left the venue— that’s the only thing that can deter him from the fantasy.

“johnny will get you anything you need during the match. we won’t be here more than twenty minutes sweetheart.” simon promises as he gives you a lopsided grin, and you know he’s going to eat you alive

he’s holding your hand with the forgotten mouthguard, urging your hand towards his lips.

“i don’t want to hurt you putting this in, maybe you should do it-“ you hesistate

simon guides your shaky fingertips to press the guard into his mouth

before you have a chance to kiss him properly, there’s an insistent knock on the door before it flies open. you’re quickly tugging simon’s mask down, backing away from the couch like you’re two teenagers who’ve been caught kissing.

“how could loose simon’s date in less than fifteen minutes? you know damn well he’s never invited anyone here. honestly, johnny-“ price chastises

“the lass was there one minute and gone the next, all these bloody hallways look the same.” soap grumbles

“sorry, i didn’t mean to worry you. i lost track of time.” you hesitated

what were you supposed to say, sorry i was too busy with my hand in your best friends mouth?

“how did ye get here?” soap asks incredulous

glancing at simon for an answer

“a superior sense of direction.” you quip

price begins laughing, before warmly shooing the two of you to arena as you give one last glance to simon which earns you a boyish wink. you and johnny are arguing about the superior slushy flavor while sharing pretzel, until the fight begins. the crowd is overwhelming, your stomach shifts, a white knuckled grip on the barrier in front of you as you watch simon emerge.

within the first five minutes, maybe less simon has knocked out his opponent. he’s stepping over his body to exit the ring making eye contact with you across the crowded arena as price ushers him past reporters. johnny is moving you towards the exit in front of him this time, until you reach the parking lot into a black car with a driver smoking against it.

“be gentle with him bonnie.” johnny urges shooting you a tight lipped smile

he returns to flicking through the radio stations fidgeting in his seat and fills the silence by complaining about american pop stars. you’re midway through explaining the genius of chappell roan when the door beside you vacuums all the air conditioning.

simon is climbing into the backseat beside you, lifting your wrist towards him as he glances at your watch. he lingers on your wrist, rubbing small circles into your palm.

“twenty minutes, as promised.” simon reiterated

johnny is calling him a sod for his dressing room stunt until simon tosses car keys into his lap.

“you two kids have fun.” johnny calls out as the driver pulls out of the carpark

you’re waving out the window, thanking johnny for babysitting you with a grin.

“he’s really nice.” you whisper to simon

simon raises the divider between the driver and looks down at you. you’re adorable and your tongue is cherry red from the drink you were sipping no doubt. he’s desperate for your kiss, even more starved for your praise about his performance or timeliness.

“bet you wish you met him first.” simon provoked looking out the window

he knows this is childish, it’s too soon for him want your affection this badly. the one night stand he and soap shared is still a sore subject in their friendship, everyone wants johnny. ghost wants you all to himself and it could ruin simon’s chances of giving you an evening to remember.

“i want your friends to like me, they seem really important to you. i thought it was sweet of you to introduce me, even if it’s our first date.” you soothed

“i thought you wanted something serious, marriage, the whole lot” simon spilled

he wonders if all of romantic missteps will make you exit this moving car. maybe he’s giving you more than you bargained for all in one night.

“i figured it would scare you away.” you mumble

“you don’t scare me.” simon confesses

you’re caressing his jaw wondering what it would be like to have your hands in his hair. you look him over trying to asses if he’s hurt in anyway. even without an injury the crowd was overwhelming. you don’t understand how anyone could get used to that kind of chaos, plus the momentum of traveling. you lay your hand over his and peer over his shoulder to see out his window, idly wondering where you’re headed. simon is slipping his hand out of your grasp, in an instant pulling away from you. until he leans over you, you’re fluttering your eyes shut anticipating for him to kiss you. the reverie ends with the graze of his hand over your waist, he’s only putting your seatbelt on.

“didn’t think you cared about safety hazards.” you chirped trying to evade the embarrassment of assuming for the second time tonight that he’s tempted to kiss you

tugging down the hem of your little black dress, you’re trying your place where you are in the city.

simon rests his meaty palm over you knee, with calloused fingers he’s gently cupping your knee.

“just trying to get you to dinner in one piece.” simon informs as he tugs of the collar of his shirt

a/n:

reblogs, comments, and inbox requests appreciated :))

all love to the sweetest beta reader: @aphelionwrotes11

[dira333]

To those who've been burnt - Shinsou x Reader

Request by @bookishgalaxies - I wrote by vibes only, so I hope you'll like it

“What do boys like?” You ask, staring at the foam on top of your hot chocolate. 

Lately, your Instagram feed has been full of cute latte art pics, of hearts and cats and love confession drawn into the milky froth. But this is real life and your hot chocolate doesn’t even get a dusting of chocolate powder.

“Huh?” Hitoshi asks, almost drowning in his drink. You don’t have to ask to know what he got, bribed the barista to make it despite all common sense. He always gets too many extra shots of espresso.

“Girls like to get flowers. Or cute little trinkets. What do boys like? You know, as random presents?”

“Boys like flowers too,” He says and pushes his plate toward you. “Can you peel my orange?”

“Sure.” You dig your nails into it, feel warmth rising up your spine as you notice how he’s watching you, the movement of your fingers, doesn’t miss the little gasp you take when you manage to squirt orange juice into your face. 

When you drop the first slice into his waiting palm you know you’re already a little more than just friends.

-

“Hey,” Hitoshi knocks against the frame of your door, leans against it as if it’s the only thing keeping him up at the late hour of nine in the morning. “Did you put those flowers on my desk?”

“What?” You look up from this week's report, your cheeks no doubt creased from how heavy your head has rested on your hands. “Oh, yeah, that was me.”

There’s the softest hint of a blush on his cheeks as he opens his mouth again.

“Why, though?”

“They reminded me of you.”

-

“Come on,” Hitoshi pulls you a little closer, “Don’t fall asleep.”

“ButI’msotired,” you mumble groggily. If only coffee tasted better and Energy Drinks didn’t come carbonated. You’d take the world by storm.

“Here.” His hands are warm against your ears. Seconds later the sounds of late-night travel are muffled, from the chewing of the person to your left to the chatter of the school girls opposite to you. You raise your hands to find that he’s put his headphones over your ears. 

Before you can ask about it, Hitoshi presses play on his phone.

You recognize the song immediately, the upbeat tempo making you move your shoulders on instinct until you’re bobbing up and down in your seat, dancing along without ever getting up.

Hitoshi’s grinning into his scarf by the time the song’s ending and you knock your head into his.

“You did that on purpose!” You hiss, probably louder than you’ve wanted to. He just shrugs and presses play on the next one.

-

“Are you free this weekend?”

You look up from the water cooler, fully expecting to witness the newest scoop of office gossip. Instead, you’re now directly facing Hiro, the agency's newest Sidekick.

And he’s looking at you like he’s waiting for an answer.

“I’m busy,” you say, but you’ve never been good at lying. Your quirk makes it even worse. 

“Is it because I’m a colleague?” Hiro’s leaning on the water cooler now, showing off the impressive biceps you’ve heard the other accountants swoon about.

No, you want to say. It’s because I have a crush on the guy who’s more than your best friend but never outright made clear if you were dating. And you went along with it, knowing it would happen eventually. But can you say that you have a boyfriend or would that be too forward?

“Hello?” Hiro taps your temple with his pointer finger. “Are you still in there?”

“Uh, yeah. I- I’m not interested.” There. The truth, plain and simple.

“Oh, okay.” Hiro pushes himself away from the water cooler. “But if you change your mind-”

“I know where to find you,” you joke, noticing only now that Hitoshi’s leaning in the door to his office, arms crossed over his chest. Oh. 

-

“Hey,” Hitoshi stops in front of your apartment building.

Neither of you have addressed the topic at hand. And you don’t think it will happen soon.

You’re fine with that, you really are. You don’t need him to confirm something you already know. Not when he’s holding your hand right now, not when there’s a bouquet from him on your kitchen table right now. So maybe he needs a little more time to put into words what already exists. You’ve always known him to take a little longer to trust reality. That’s just a thing that happens to people who got burned before.

“Hey,” you say back, lean your head against his shoulder. “Do you wanna come up?”

He does not answer, instead he stretches out his hand and draws something onto the dirty rear window of a parked car with his finger.

When you lean over to see, he pushes you away with a tsk. 

“Let me finish first,” he mumbles softly and you giggle, wait until he stops resisting.

There, painted into the dirt, is a little heart, filled with your Initials.

“Are you sure about that?” You ask, “That’s mighty official. This will probably stay on here for the rest of time.”

“I’m fine with that,” he says and taps your nose with the dirty finger, chuckles as you pull away in disgust.

-

In the morning, you’ll draw a heart onto the fogged up mirror.

You’ll hold his hand on the morning commute. Hitoshi will pretend not to notice when you slip your Ipod into his bag, prepped with a playlist just for him.

He’ll pick you up for lunch, hand on the small of your back as you find the most secluded part of the cafeteria.

When the lunch lady asks if you’re dating, you’ll both smile instead of answering and she’ll coo and put a little more meat on both of your plates.

And when Hitoshi and Hiro get paired up for afternoon patrol, Hitoshi will pull him to the side real quick and tell him, calmly but not without warning, that you are his girlfriend.

Join My Taglist

[ashdreams2023]

hiiii!!!! i love your works so muchhh🫶🫶🫶!! i hope you're still accepting requests about five, where five travelled to another dimension where the reader is and can't go back to where he's from (like when he goes to the future) i hope you understand huhu. THANK YOU IN ADVANCEEE!!!!💗💗💗

Took me a minute but I think got it 😅

Five hargreeves x reader

Angst/comfort

I’m sorry

Five blinks a few times while catching his breath, he looks around him I wonder and confusion, this place can’t possibly be where you were…right?

His endless months of calculations and failed attempts, has lead him here, it was the last possible place you could’ve been.

A small town in the middle of nowhere where, the houses looked identical with the exception of the obvious well taken care of garden in the house he was walking directly walking towards.

He swallowed when he saw the small name plate on the front fence, hargreeves…

[Name] hargreeves.

He notices a few of the neighbors looking at him suspiciously from their cracked windows, kids peaking from over fences and men glaring at him as they walk by.

He was an intruder to their circle and obviously he was view as less than welcome but they didn’t scare him, not when he saw the world near end three times.

He walked inside and braced himself for what he might witness, he knocked on the door three times, then his heart skipped a beat.

"Coming! John is that you?! I didn’t think you’ll drop the groceries so early-" You opened the door and froze in your spot when you saw his face.

Five let out a breath, your familiar face made his chest feel both warm and tight at the same time, he finally found you.

"Five?…how?" You opened your mouth in disbelief then closed it again, your eyes quickly scanned the area around your house and faked a smile to the nosey neighbors.

"Inside" you pulled him gently by his sleeve, his eyes never leaving your figure, not even blinking.

After closing the door you shut the curtains then turned back to look at him, you hesitated before reaching your hand and touching his cheek "My five"

He melted into your touch and kissed the palm kissing his face "My love…I’ve finally found you"

You threw yourself into his embrace and closed your eyes "I thought I’ll never see you again…I thought this was the end for us"

Five shook his head "don’t be daft, I would search for you till the hair on my head turns gray again"

"You crazy old man!" You pulled away from him looking concerned "It’s not safe for you here…they don’t like strangers" you looked to the side looking conflicted.

He pulls your face up to look at him "I’m no stranger, I am your husband, the one you took the last name of and they should know better than to mess with me regarding my family"

Your eyes teared up a little, you pulled away from him looking down at the floor "I know why you’re here but…I can’t go back with you five"

His expression showed confusion "Why? I can definitely get us back I-"

"No…no you can’t, you think I haven’t tried before? I tried every possible equation and no one of them did me any good, I’m stuck here five and you can’t do anything about it…I’m sorry"

Five clenched his fists and then marched to you and grabbed your wrist "I refuse to leave here alone! I am not leaving without you!" He focused his powers on the exact equation he tried earlier but just like your words it was like nothing was affecting your existence there, for he was all powered up and ready to leave you stayed unaffected.

His body slumped down, he let go of you and looked down at his hands frustration and anger at himself "There has to be a way…I’m-"

"Five I’m so sorry" You hugged him from behind "I wish things could be different" you whispered.

Five rubbed his face groaning then put his hands on top of yours "We both tried separately but…it doesn’t mean we can’t try together, work with me…I’m not giving up on us, I’ll wait years if meant for you to come back with me to our dimension"

"But your family-"

"You are my family too!" He tightened his grip on your hands "and I’m not gonna lose you again"

You sniffed then hid your face in on his back "I’m sorry, I’ll try to help"

"No, don’t be, it’s my fault and…I’m the one who’s sorry, you deserve the life I promised you and more..I promise to give you that, it’s the least I can do but do you trust me?" He ask’s looking back at you.

You nodded your head "I do, I trust you with my life"



[writing-with-sophia]

Hi! Thank you for your blog. It really helps with writing ♡

I have a question throught,

How can you refer to a character without using their name, hair/eye colour, or gender???

I hope this question isn't too difficult or boring. Thank you in advance :))

Ways to refer to a character without using their name, hair/eye color, or gender

This is pretty hard.

Way number 1: Emphasize their role or profession

This is what I often encounter in the short stories I study at school. Authors often use professional terms such as "artist", "driver", "farmer", "engineer", etc. to name the characters throughout the story. Doing so often has two main purposes: one is to make it easier for readers to remember the characters thanks to their most typical characteristics (occupations), and the other is that the author wants to target that character as representing a community or a larger class.

For example, "farmer" is a character representing the peasantry and working class, while "teacher" represents the intellectual class, and "princess" represents the aristocracy. These characters do not represent themselves, but rather the classes or communities they symbolize, so they do not have individual names.

Way number 2: Also emphasize their role, but combined with descriptive phrases

In situations where the characters don't represent any wider community but just the character themselves, you can add some descriptive phrases in front. For example, "the young barista", "the elderly neighbor". Thus, you can both diversify the way the character is called and describe some typical characteristics of that character without revealing gender, appearance, etc.

Way number 3: Employ metaphors or analogies

This is a pretty cool way, but I advise you not to overdo it. Instead of talking about name, gender, characteristics, etc. directly, you can use metaphors. For instance, a leader is "the lion of the group", "the alpha", or a misfit is "the black sheep". It sounds much better, right?

Here is a short paragraph I hastily wrote using metaphors and analogies to refer to the characters without mentioning gender or names:

The melancholic melody of the violin echoed through the room, its sorrowful notes washing over the gathered onlookers like a gentle rain. The performer, a beacon of grace and poise, moved with the fluidity of a dancer, captivating all who bore witness. Long, slender fingers danced on the white keys like a staircase from heaven, weaving a tapestry of emotions that covered the space. Each up and down is a heartbeat, a breath, a silent conversation between artist and audience.

That's all! If you have any questions, please inbox me!

[bsof-maarav]

it's good this is my only social media and that i've insulated myself from the worst of this place. i'm not watching that video. i understand the value in bearing witness. but for me, it's like this. i know what's been happening to the hostages already, i don't need to be convinced. i don't want to violate them further by watching the beginning of the worst part of their lives and i don't want to be even more secondhand traumatized either. it would make me less, not more, able to do what i can do to be of use to the hostages.

but even more than i'm not watching that video, i'm not watching the absolutely psychopathic response to it by the mobs who are indulging in an orgy of probably the two oldest forms of hatred in the world--misogyny and antisemitism.

when i heard this video would be released, i had that impulse to hope that maybe now my former friends and community would finally get it. but it's not the case. we've all known this whole time. there's been no mystery about what kind of violence the go-pro wearing terrorists are perpetrating. we've already seen enough to know, even without seeking it out. journalists have described it thoroughly as well. if someone says they need to see something more explicit for "proof," they're nothing but consumers of terrorist torture porn. it's pure רַע

i'm not even going to try writing any appeals about these womens' humanity because anyone who doesn't get it, that's because they don't want to get it and they probably never will. they're getting off on this dehumanizing violence and trying to join it as part of the virtual mob. they're empty people and they are not going to change.

we are looking directly at this hate, some of us for the first time, and it's a window through time, through which we can see what many generations of Jews, and particularly Jewish women, have seen before. the violence and hatred is unchanging. only the technology of the violence has changed. the violence itself has not. the hatred has not. we know more about every previous age now, more about how our ancestors' hearts felt when they were breaking, the fear and anger, the determination to survive and make something better.

it's unbearable to know how outnumbered we are, how much of the world is morally and ethically dead when it comes to us, and how many of them accept, deny, are indifferent to, or celebrate this violence against us. it always has been unbearable, untenable, and yet we're here: the latest in a long line of generations who move forward even when it feels impossible, and do what we can to make a better world for the next ones with the conviction that no one should be hurt like this. never again.

and now i'm going back to listening to Israeli music. because i try to experience some kind of peace and calm each day, whatever i can, so i will have some strength to send. through davening, i try to send strength to the hostages to help them survive. we're one family, and all deeply connected. i have to hope that it helps in some way.

if you want to say Mi Sheberach and Tehillim for these women and don't know how, please reach out. or just daven from the heart for them, dedicate it to their merit, say each of their names out loud. light an extra Shabbat candle for them. set an extra place at your table. put something about them in a public place to make their reality present there. you'll have to protect it from attack. but do it anyway.

and if you want to know what you can do to pressure your political representatives or organizations to do something to free these captives, and all of the captives, i'll be here to talk about that as well.

[starillusion13]

I Know it's weird to ask erm.... but Can you pleaseeee do the four seasons of love one with Yunho version because I want to imagine him in that fic and am currently obsessssssed with YUNHO. I know I can read the fic inserting his name but stilll PLEASE IF YOU CAN DO IT.

FOUR SEASONS OF LOVE (Yunho ver.)

Pairing: Ateez! Yunho × f! reader

Genre: Slight angst, Fluff, Slice of life

Warning: self doubt, hints of hating and willing to end life.But our big baby is there to comfort you and show that life is worth to you when you are with right person. A lot of comfort through the images of seasons. You all are precious remember it.

W.C: 4.2k+

Network: @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet

A/n: don't accuse me for plagiarism coz if you have read this fic before then you must have read the Chanyeol ver.This plot is basically inspired from his solo songs but I had literally Yunho on my mind for this but as I had a request for Chanyeol oneshot so I used this. Thanks to the anon for making me post it.

Many thoughts storming through your mind. Your mind swirling like a cyclone, heart clenching and hands going numb. Nobody wants you, no one even cares for your existence. Maybe they are right that your parents left you at the orphanage because you are unwanted. Why? You never hurt anyone or being a threat to anyone. The only person you have your faiths and trust on has suddenly turned their back to you. You never thought that you have to witness a day like this too after being treated like a shit all these years. Was it not enough for you already?

"Why should I live now?"

Tilting your head back and closing the eyes, you let the raindrops fall on your face directly. Hairs are already drenched and sticking to your forehead and neck, not even caring to move the strands falling on your eyes. Numb hands growing cold under the heavy rain, eyes swollen with crying but people might mistake your eyes are red due to rain. Each falling drop getting mixed with your tears rolling down. Tears of pain? Tears of loneliness? Tears of betrayal? No. Tears of hope.

"Why can't everyone be happy?"

You must be right. Not everyone deserves to be treated as someone's priority. Someone has to feel the pain to let others be happy. You lightly chuckle on your own thoughts. Like always you have to be the sacrifice. Your feet move on its own and now you are standing in the middle of the road surrounded by abandoned constructed buildings. At least there are no people here to judge your every moves.

Unknowingly, you spread your arms and head still facing the sky but with a little smile adorning your face.

"Can I fly alone?"

Its past safety hours at night and you are getting soaked in rain in an empty street and thinking about flying. Are you a child? Maybe only if you can be a child and someone would care about you and take you in their arms and whisper Its okay. I'm here for you.. You want someone to care for you, someone to give you the warmth you crave in your life. This cold rainy night is befriending your nightmares to make you alone, to make you feel...you are not good for anyone.

"Such a bad girl.”

Your eyes shot open on hearing the voice. Rather a very familiar teasing voice you must say. You don't even care to look in the direction to know who the person is but let the raindrops pierce your eyes directly, making you to squint on the effect.

"If you are trying to be blind then I have some better options for you to try."

Better option? Death. You don't see any will to live your life. What life? To be an extra character in everyone's story. Every individual on this planet has their own story but you must believe that you are just the extra one in their story to make give them more spotlight by increasing the sea of people.

"Why are you here?"

"Well, I should have asked you the same, little angel."

Little angel. If only you could have been one then you would have done everything possible to be happy. Just be happy and away from these people who blame you for everything. You are a bad luck to everyone.

Bringing your hands to yourself, eyes fixed on the broken wooden board hanging from the wall of a building to your front. Your back still facing the person but you can feel the stares burning on you.

"I'm not in a mood for your jokes."

"I'm asking you a question not joking. This is not your colony and also not mine but the complex there is mine and I come here often. So, what brings you here?"

"Can't you just leave and let me be alone for once?"

Silence. That's what you got in return. Like others, he also left. Your heart clenched on the thought and your shaking hands turned into fists by your side.

Why are you feeling like this? Its not like you were appreciating his presence, or were you? At least him teasing you whole day somewhat makes you feel that someone care to spend a little bit of their time to talk to you....... To tease you maybe. With hope, hope? You turn around slowly, gaze following how each drop hitting the ground and shattering into tiny droplets. Just like your hopes to see him behind will shatter soon into pieces of disappointment, loneliness and pain.

"Yunho?..”

He is still there, hands in the pocket of his hoodie and eyes boring onto your figure. You feel a bit of joy but for what, just to see him standing there? Like the way an angry mother scolding her child for being out so late. Your shocked eyes contacting with the daring eyes of his challenging self as if it's challenging you to look away.

“You are still here.....I thought-“

"You thought like everyone else I will also leave you alone here." His tone is monotonous, not even hinting any sort of emotions behind it, neither of caring nor even of hatred.

You nod your head obliviously.

He 'tsch' and shakes his head, footsteps approach you. You try to avoid the closeness, panicking you are looking everywhere to just run away from him. But deep down, you want to stay close to him, to hear his teasing voice and to make you annoyed until you glare at him and he will return you a playful wink. At least, he never made you feel alone or ever hurt you.

"Why?"

Why? It's obvious because am not a one to waste your precious time on. You want to scream this on his face but you feel your throat becomes heavy with a lump stuck inside. You are about to break down because you can't take this feeling that someone is waiting to hear your response. Caring for you.

"Please..go away...if you are here to tease me later for this then please go away."

"Do I hurt you?"

"Huh?"

"Do I hurt you with my teasing?"

"I d-don't know." No.

“Do I make you uncomfortable when am around you?"

No.

He paused but your lost eyes staring at him made him continue. "Do I burden you?"

No.

You want to scream but you can't utter a single world but gazing up at him with lost swollen eyes. His warm hands cupped your cheeks. Why are his hands warm and yours cold? Oh, God has a priority.

He is also drenched but not like you for almost over an hour. His few portions of the clothing are soaked but his hairs are getting wet fully, his umbrella lying upside-down at the side of the street. Why is he getting wet despite having an umbrella?

"Do you hate me?"

No? Yes? Do you? Well, you really didn't think of him like this way before. Do you really want him to go away? You never felt hurt because of him. Rather you enjoy his company. You don't know whether it's bad or not but you love his presence. His presence is the last thing that can burden you. When everyone is turning their back to you, he is the only one looking at you with mischievousness of course.

"Yunho...don't ask me this." Your fingers tightly hold his wrists but you are keeping his hands close to you, leaning to his touch more. Seeking the comfort in his warmth, you are feeling safe.

"Why?"

"I, myself don't know how to respond you."

The rain has stopped but the tears still keeping your eyes wet.

"Y/N, will you let me hold you like this forever? I can't see you broken like this anymore. You don't know how much it hurts me whenever I see you crying."

"What are you saying?"

“Everyone breaks you down but you try to stay strong. You put on a fake smile just to lie to yourself that you are fine. But I want to see the real you.”

“I-n-no...I'm fine."

"Really? Crying alone in the middle of the street under the heavy rain and I have to believe that you are fine like always."

"Why are you being like this Yunho? I hate when people show me comfort out of pity. I am used to being alone like this so just leave me and go away."

No, please don't go. You try to move away his hand but he doesn't budge and his cold eyes staring deep in your orbs as if it can read the hidden truth behind those tears. His thumbs brush over your cheeks, wiping away the tears which are rolling down. Why are you crying? He is not doing anything to you.

"This is why I never approached you to show my care. I always see you getting hate from the ones you have trusted and that's why I wanted to be someone to you whom you will have some different kind of feelings. I didn't want you to see me as others who is just pitying you but I wanted you to see me treating you like a regular person.”

"Different kind of feelings?"

He squeezes your cheeks and smiles at your silly face. Those slight dimples occurring in the end of his smile on the cheeks, your hands move upward to touch them and you can feel him lean to your touch and closing his eyes for a moment.

"Yes, puffer fish. Someone approaching you like you are a loner to their eyes and then suddenly turning their back to you when you actually started to lean on them. I never wanted that to happen between us. I wanted you to see me differently from others. So, I started to tease you and you have to agree that sometimes I have really made you laugh. Also, your glares, you think you look so angry and scary but you just look silly."

"Yaaa." You slap his arms and his dimples deepen when he smiles wider which brings a little smile on your lips.

And this is Yunho. The tease who doesn't leave a single chance to annoy you even at this moment when you are so vulnerable and confused with your feelings. But what is the meaning of different kind of feelings?

"I wanted you to see me as an annoying person who can make you angry, frustrated, getting on your nerves so you make silly faces at me when am too much overbearing and also laugh with me on my jokes. But-"

His fingers tracing your cheekbones and big doe eyes staring at your swollen eyes.

"But?" your voice is like a whisper but he can still hear you.

"But I always try to make you forget others, how they mistreat you, how they ignore you, how they hurt you. I don't want to see you cry over them. I want to see you smiling Y/N."

"Why are you doing this, Yunho?"

You are suddenly being held in a big warm hug, him holding you tightly as if you might blow away with the light breeze blowing after the heavy rain. Your body shivers due to the weather but his warm hug feels so comfortable and you wrap your arms around his big frame. Can you provide him the same warmth back?

"I can't see you like this Y/N. Please let me be a part of your life. Please."

Your body again shivers to the wind and he retreats from the hug. A part of your life? Which life? The one you don't even know what is the use of its existence where everyone knows just to hurt you and ignore you.

“Y/N?"

"Hmmm...”

"Let's go home. You will catch cold like this."

"I don't want to go home."

Why? The place where you feel secure, away from all the judging eyes but suffocating yourself with the thousand thoughts within those four walls of your apartment.

He suddenly picks you up in his arms, your shocked face getting a chuckle and wide smile from him.

"What are you doing? Put me down."

"Well, if you don't go by your own then l'm taking you like this."

"Yaaa put me down. You don't even know my place and if I start to shout right now, you will really be accused for kidnapping.”

"Hm that's right but I can say that someone was trying to end her life and I am just being her saviour. Also, I'm taking you to my place so please keep quiet and let's go before you really die of this cold."

Die? Yes, but will you be really okay after that?

"No. I will not go with you.?

"And I'm not leaving you here."

"Yunho...”

“Please Y/N.” His creased forehead and serious look urging you to agree with him.

You nod but still your thoughts are running as why you are trusting him so much. If tomorrow like others he will also leave you.Then? He will act as a stranger to you. He will avoid you as if today never happened between you two. His teasing will stop and he will hate you because he has seen you vulnerable so many times. You have cried in front of him many times but why you always show this side to him even when you had a boyfriend. Well, that shit was only there for you for a bet and just left you alone in the darkness when you were taking things too seriously according to him. How foolish of you! You thought he was the perfect one.

But this feeling being in Yunho’s arms and feeling safe and having the warm comfort, you never had this with your boyfriend and this thought is really disturbing you.

"Yunho...” He looks down at you when he enters the complex building to make his way towards the elevator. "Why?"

"What?"

"Are you really caring for me because we are.....we know each other?"

Pressing the twelfth floor by his elbow, he nods to himself.

"Because you are my four seasons of love."

"Huh?" Your confused face only got a tight smile from him. You ask him again but he didn't say anything instead waiting for the floor. You thanked mentally that other people didn't get in and see you like this even when you tried to make him put you down but his teasing was the only thing keeping you distracted. Ding! You have arrived to the floor.

He puts you down but still holding your one hand, the other one unlocking the door. With a pull, he lets you inside the apartment and locking the door behind. Your eyes taking in the new environment, each and every piece of decoration screaming richness, looking around the way, your eyes caught a photo frame of a family picture. You didn't notice when he left you there wandering on your own, returns with a towel in his hand.

"Is that your family?"

"Yes. That's our last picture which we clicked when I was in middle school.”

Oh! Suddenly you feel him put the towel on your head and starts rubbing the scalp and hair. You try to stop him and insist that you can do it yourself but he doesn't budge and continues. After having satisfied with your somewhat dried hairs, he gives you a pair of spare clothes to change into but your hesitating self is not willing to do it in someone's apartment.

"Are you really going to stand here in these clothes?It's already raining again and I don't think it will be nice for you to go at this hour. I will not let you go even if you put your rebellious acts."

"But I can wait until it stops raining.”

"You will let your clothes get dry on you? No way, I don't want someone to fall sick in my place.”

"Its okay."

"Do you want me to change your clothes or what?"

"Yaaa Yunho."

You hit his arm earning a loud laugh from him and he pat your cheeks directing you to his bedroom to use the personal bathroom and he will use the other one. After getting freshen up, when you make your way towards the living room, he is standing by the wide glass window showing the blurry city view behind the window because of raindrops hitting the glass.

"What are you doing there?"

He is in black t-shirt with matching trousers and hairs damp after shower and you in similar grey set but of his size. He turns around and scans your form which makes you a bit self-conscious. And man, he suddenly starts laughing holding his stomach which brings a frown on your face.

"Why are you laughing?"

"You look so funny in my clothes. Yo-you look like a kitten got dumped under a pile of clothes.”

You go beside him to take a peek at outside because you love to watch such views in rainy days. You shoot him a glare when he pinches your cheek between his laugh.

"It's not my fault that you are literally a giraffe.”

If there was no rain then the city might look so silent from up here, right? If I have lived somewhere like this, I would have got a better life, right?

You feel arms wrap around from your back and him resting his chin on top of your head. Your stiff body and lost eyes watching the reflection of yours on the blurry window that how much height difference you both have.

"I love you, Y/N."

Love you? Is he teasing you again? If yes or if no, in both the cases, he should not love you because, you don't want him to turn his back too when he will be bored of you. You don't want to lose him too.

"Don't. You should not love me. One day you will also get tired of me and leave me broken. So, it's better how we are now with each other. Like just...friends."

“Don't you want to hear my answers to your question?"

"Which one?"

"Why you are my four seasons of love?"

"Hm...Tell me.” Your fingers tracing some patterns on the glass against each raindrop hitting the frame.

“Tell me the sequence of seasons."

"Ummm Spring Summer Fall Winter?"

"Yup. I love you differently in every four seasons so I cant ever get tired to love you."

"What?"

"Let's start with spring. The season of love, the blooming start of every individual, every life and every relationship. We can start our first love in the spring when there will be bright sunlight with birds chirping as if a melody playing for our bond. Holding hands under the cherry blossom while knowing each other for the first time. The joy, love and beginning of our life will be in this season. Every year this season will be the start to our love from the beginning."

"Summer?"

"Summer is the season of explore, when our love will take the centre of the stage. The clear sky with blazing sun and warm breeze hitting our skin making us feel to be loved by each other. A warm love between us where we can explore into each other's depth like the way the whole world gets explored by the bright sunlight. We will travel together, explore the life and our love. The bond between us can be taken to a different stage where the only spotlight will be on our romance."

"Fall? Will our love fall here?"

"No. The beginning of fall is with rainy days when we can have our breakdowns. Don't think it as fall, see it as autumn. We can show our vulnerable selves towards each other without any hesitation. The grey clouds making the atmosphere dark and gloomy, the falling leaves from the living trees making it seem like a dead. Our relationship should show all its fault in front of our eyes. No one is perfect but our imperfectness makes each one of us unique and an individual to stand out otherwise we all would have considered same. We can cry with the rain, we can fail in our life but we will again stand on our feet the next day holding each other.”

"Winter?…….”

You can feel him nuzzling his nose into your damp hairs inhaling his shampoo, a smile ghosting over his face. Your one hand still busy on the glass while the other one takes a hold of his hand around you. A wave of comfort and warmth spreading over your body. You can sense yourself being held in safe hands, protected from this whole cruel world and him describing you why you should let him to love you. But winter, the cold environment when every relationship drifts apart because of the numbness in their bond. Will it happen to you too?

“Winter. Well, the season of festive. The most romantic season when we can make more love with each other, we will support our decisions, will spend time together. When the whole world will be under the thick cold white blanket of snow, we will find the warmth in each other. The season when we can share our most hidden secrets and light up mysteries hidden in the cold darkness of our life. We will solve our problems and make love with joy in the festivals like Christmas eve and new year. We can also have one more thing."

"One more thing?"

He turns you around, caging your body between his warm frame and cold window frame. His hands resting beside each side of your face. His big doe eyes watching your every reaction on the face with a sly smile resting on his face and his puffy cheeks again making an appearance. Your hands on the window space keeping your balance leaning backward due to his close proximity. He leans forward to whisper in your ears.

"Winter is also known as the cuffing season. Maybe, we can plan our future in some other ways."

Your big round shock eyes earn a wide smirk on his face. He laughs when you hit his arms and try to move away but he holds you in the place with a soft look and an admiration in his eyes. As if you are the most precious aspect of his life which is resting in front of his eyes.

"Let me love you, Y/N.”

"Yunho. What if I don't deserve you?"

"We don't know ourselves what we deserve or not but we can give chances until we lose hope on everything. And I don't want you to lose hope on me. Please don't leave me.”

Leave him? This is the first time, someone is asking you not to leave them and you are sure you are not going to do the same thing like others did to you. With a last glance on his face, you hug him catching him off guard but he quickly returns you the hug. His cologne hitting your nose strongly and a spell of hope surrounding you both. His heart beating against your ears bringing a melody of love and your heart matching the beats. Your fingers curling to grab his t-shirt in your tight fist. Tears rolling down your cheeks and his hands moving up and down in your back to soothe your nerves with overwhelming feelings.

“Thank you, Yunho. I love you."

"I love you more angel.”

He pulls you away to press a soft kiss on your temple, on your eyes, on the tip of your nose and then pauses. Your heart racing with every kiss from his warm lips. With your closed eyes, you nod to him.

He closes the distance between your lips. Holding the back of your head and the other resting on your cheeks, he deepens the kiss. A passionate kiss for a blooming love. This is a perfect kiss like a dance, a symphony of lips and chance for a new beginning. A moment where time stands still and all the world is hushed and still. The outside loud cold rain is blocked by the window pane for the silent warm love inside. Only lips, no tongue, no other skin as if only the lips can swallow each other to protect them in a cage.

Breaking apart from the kiss, his forehead rest against yours and he presses a soft kiss on your nose. A genuine smile filled with joy dancing on your lips and he smiles back to you. Fingers wiping the fallen tears which are drying on your cheeks.

"I love to see you smile when it is raining."

"I love to see your soft puffy cheeks when you smile."

"And my teasings?"

"Yunho....” you whine on his ask.

"You will always be my four seasons of love."

Standing close to each other, in a warm embrace of love and the cold rain making the whole city gloomy except where you both found each other's happiness and love. Each drop of your loneliness, pain and disappointment is breaking down into love, joy and hope.

Your smile is the umbrella for you under the rain and the sound of falling rain is the rhythm to your life and he is the sunshine to make you dance in the rain. Yes, you are his four seasons of love and. And he to you?

"And,You will be my sunshine in every season."

Reblogs and Reviews are always appreciated. Please do me favor and reblog it🙂.

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[jillsandwhichs]

RE Character x Reader Smutshot Collection , Chap 1 , Talking Body

Masterlist

Piring: F!reader x Chris Redfield

Summary: Chris finds out about the fact you're insecure about your body and takes matters into his own hands

Status of your guy's relationship in this smutshot: Dating!

WC: 5.5k

Type: NSFW

Warnings: Insecurities, Mentions of an ed, Clit rubbing, Dirty talk, P in V, Hair pulling, Praising kink, Breath play & No condom

A/n: Hi! Hope you all enjoy. Please check out my masterlist, there's a lot of stuff there. You can get to know me, you can see the rules of my blog and then you can see all of my fanfictions. You'll be able to find the previous chapters to this fic and upcoming ones. You'll also be able to find my Wattpad & AO3. Thank you

The mirror paints a reflection of the body you hate most. Staring back at it, you scoff in disgust. 'How could I let myself get this bad?', you think to yourself. You were wearing a cropped tank top with shorts, considering it was over 80⁰ today. The summer heat is no force to be reckoned with. Even with the AC kicked on in your bedroom, it wasn't going to stop the heat from finding it's way into the apartment. The AC's were practically busted anyhow.

You wandered around your small bedroom, aimlessly thinking about different ways you could view yourself in a more positive fashion. The only source of confidence you ever manage to have is when you're all covered up or directly after a workout. It's not like you're a slob or anything, you don't even understand how you've managed to gain weight. Even so, the flat out disgust you feel about yourself is clear as day.

Pacing around some more, you paused as you watched you dog come running in the room, barking and being obnoxious as ever. "What do you want, boy?" You giggle as you questioned your dog. You and your boyfriend, Chris, recently adopted him from an animal shelter. He was a great way to distract you from your insecurities. You could hear his subtle panting as he made attempts to jump up onto the lifted queen sized bed.

"Oh come here..." You laugh as you pick him up, placing him carefully onto the bed. He must've been over heated from being out in the other room. Your bedroom, the one you share with your boyfriend, is the only room with AC throughout all of the apartment. It was also micro sized so it got cold quickly.

His tounge was out as he rolled around on the bed, his hair shedding & sticking onto it. "Oh whose a good boy?" You snicker, plopping down on the bed beside him but right as you did, you watched as your rolls folded, you felt even more insecure now. This is exactly why you feel better being all covered up. You can't even escape it, not at home, not anywhere. Huffing out softly, you rub your temple firmly, you could just feel the eventual headache coming in.

You remember how you used to not care so much about your body. Hell, once upon a time you've been bigger than this and even now, you aren't even able to be considered chubby. But your mind doesn't allow you to have that positive mindset. Overthinking is a bitch. The only person whose ever there to reassure you is your boyfriend but even then, it's hard believing it, he's just saying that because he's obligated too. Does he not find you gross as well? He has too.

You stared down at your stomach, watching as the two rolls poked out. If you stood up, it wasn't as bad, actually, it was more bearable, but even then it was still upsetting to witness. But sitting down? It was just 100x worse. What haunts you even further is the fact your boyfriend works for the BSAA, all sorts of fit & attractive women work there, like his friend Jill, does he find her more attractive? Does he check her out without knowing? Was this all just deep down a fear of Chris not finding you appealing anymore?

Snapping you out of your trance, your dog barked loudly as your iPhone, which was resting on the entertainment center in front of you began to ring. "Oh just relax, boy." You whisper to your pup, giving him numerous smooches on the head before pushing yourself off of the bed and back onto your small feet. Your phone showed an icon of you & Chris together with formal attire on, that's how you knew it was him. It was his ID photo in your contacts.

Picking your phone up, you accepted the call and put it on speaker. "Hi." You calmly spoke out, waiting from a response on his end. "Hey princess, I'm on my way home now, I was able to clock out early today." Chris said with a loving tone, his voice also sort of distant due to the loud traffic in the background. "Oh, that's good baby, how far are you from home?" "I'd say like ten minutes." He answered your question. "How's the pup doing?" "Great, he's on our bed right now, just loving the AC." You snort out, petting him as you climbed back onto the bed.

A cackle releases from Chris as he hears what you said. "That's good. I'm glad he's settling in well. How are you doing, baby?" He asks, his tone gentle. Chris always makes sure you're okay, it's like he has senses to know when you aren't. "I'm fine, kind of hungry though." "Oh, want me to stop somewhere? I'll get you whatever you'd like." You think about his offer for a second before knowing you had to turn it down. No need to eat for the rest of the day. "No, I'm okay." "Hmm, I'm sure babe." Chris snickers - he can tell you're lying through your teeth.

"But anyways, I'll be home soon babygirl." "Sounds good... I love you." "Love you too baby." Chris cooed before you then ended the call. It was short & sweet. It was 3 PM, you could definitely live without eating for the rest of the day. Maybe you'll even be able to get another work out in. In your head, not eating yet working out will do you just good. It'll help you. Although, whenever you Google whether or not that's a smart strategy, you're just given links to eating disorder websites.

You aren't sure if whether or not you have an ED, your wellness doctor has told you there's a chance, but you feel as though you eat fine enough. It's just some day's are harder than other's. But that's normal. Chris even tells you that he doesn't think you do suffer from one but if you did, he'd help you recover every step of the way. He's really a great boyfriend. He's always there for you. You honestly couldn't have asked for someone better - someone better than him doesn't even exist.

Your dog continuously licked and nipped at you, he was a hyper boy. You were happy with the fact Chris was on board with getting one. You also never knew until recently that your apartment complex allows cat's & dog's. "Oh, you're such a good boy!" You praised him, his tail wagged at an even faster rate now. "Aww, look at you." You muttered to him, your face close to his as he'd occasionally slurp at your face. "Crazy pup." You giggled before lastly getting off of the bed, leaving him by himself to play.

You ambled back over to the mirror in your bedroom, it was long & skinny, it was what you dreamt to be. Chris bought it for you this past Christmas. It wasn't meant to look at and see someone you're ashamed of but to look into it and check yourself out, do your make up and he's put it to use in other ways as well... But, you're appreciative that he bought it, you just wish that every time you passed by it, you wouldn't feel sick to your stomach.

Rolling your eyes, you snatched the white, fuzzy blanket off of your bed and tossed it onto the mirror, that way you wouldn't see yourself as you pass by anymore. It worked. After doing that though, you strolled out of your bedroom and into the kitchen, which was close by, it wasn't that big of an apartment. You used to never care about what you ate & drank but that's different now. You grabbed an ice cold water from the fridge, the feeling of it's coolness on your hand was refreshing. You cannot wait for this heat wave to go away.

Twisting the cap off, you could the crackle as the seal broke. That sound was always satisfying. You took a few teeny tiny sips before putting the bottle back into the door of the fridge. It felt good, the cold liquid seeping down your throat. You felt more hungry now, the last time you ate was earlier this morning and with that, all you even ate was toast with berries. That was enough to get you through the day though. You were gonna be just fine.

"Come out here!" You shouted out to your dog, wanting him to come snuggle with you whilst chilling on the couch. You loved to utilize your living room, you'd sit out there for hour's on end. Chris isn't like that as much. Once he's out of work, he either takes a shower, eats or goes into their bedroom for the rest of the day. You don't blame him though, he's a hard working man and if he wants to relax, then he may do so. You work too, just not at a job like his. It is a lot different. His is way more tough to manage.

Jumping onto the couch, you could hear the sound of your dog's little legs running out to the living room. "Hey buddy!" You chuckled, lifting him up and putting him next to you on the couch. You grabbed the quilt and placed it beside you, making it into a comfy little spot for him to nuzzle into. You wanted to just sit and wind down before Chris gets home. You'll probably cook dinner for him. You don't know what excuse you'll use when you tell him you can't eat.

-

As you were still sitting in the same spot, on your iPhone, you heard the sound of the doorknob being twiddled with, you knew Chris home for the night. You felt a surge of warmth within you as the door open and you seen him standing in the doorway, he was still in uniform and he looked so handsome. Chris's eyes trailed up to you as he stuck the house key into his jean pocket. "Hey baby." Chris smiled at you, closing the door and wandering over to you. "Hi." You articulated hushly, standing up and holding your arms out.

Chris wrapped his arms around your lower waist, sighing deeply into the crook of your neck. His breath was hot against it but you didn't mind, you were just happy he was finally home with you. "I missed you." Chris whispered, kissing the side of your head as he pulled away from the hug. "Missed you too." You said, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "Are you okay?" Chris raised the question to you, concern on his face. "Just tired babe, you know how it is." You reassured him, your arms crossed against your chest. "If you say so." Chris snickered out, his hand going to your cheek & holding it as he gave you a loving, brisk kiss.

"What's that?" You asked as Chris set his bag down and pulled out a paper bag, you couldn't read what it said on it. "It's food, for us, for dinner." Chris said with a tranquil voice as he unbagged it. "Oh... But I told you I wasn't hungry." "Yeah, but you lied." Chris laughed, presenting the bag to her. It was one of your's & his favorites, chicken wings from the local bar. "I wasn't lying. I ate this morning." "Honey, it's almost four now, you're going to it dinner soon." Chris demanded but not meanly, rather lovingly.

You weren't going to fight back. You weren't going to say no to him. You'd probably just have to say you are sick or say you'll eat later. Of course he had to pick up chicken wings from the best spot in town. He knows you've been craving them recently. He's only trying to do good for you but eating like this won't be good. You exhaled shakily before speaking up, "I don't feel very well, do you really think wings will help that?" "Eating will. What's going on with you babygirl?" "Nothing Chris, I think I'm just tired." "Ok babe." Chris mumbled out. He seemed off now. You felt bad for how you got.

Chris placed their food onto the coffee table, along with placing his bag on the couch. He was planning to take a shower but now he was unsure. He was worried about you. He has no recollection of what's going on with you. "You in the mood to take a shower?" "Not right now baby, I was thinking of just laying in bed for awhile." "I wouldn't mind laying in bed with you." Chris smirked and set his hands onto your hips, instantly you felt insecure. Could he tell how chubby you were? You didn't want him to feel your stomach.

You stepped away but very moderately so he wouldn't notice that you didn't wanna have him touch you there. It felt so weird. Being scared of having your own boyfriend touch you, it wasn't something you were used to. Chris didn't catch on, instead he gave you another fast kiss before turning around and convoying towards your guy's shared bedroom. You followed behind him, just wanted to at least be near him.

"So, I'll take you up on that offer of laying in bed." Chris chortled, gazing behind him at you as he entered the bedroom. "I don't mind." You giggled, teasing him right back. It was apart of your guy's love language. Studying the room, Chris took notice of the thick blanket wrapped around the mirror. It confused him. "Why is there a blanket on your mirror?" He questioned you, taking the blanket off of it and throwing it back onto your bed. "I put it there to fix the bed and I never put it back, my bad." You spoke with a blue tone.

Chris stood there, a plain stare as he did so. "You know, I'm not dumb baby." Chris said softly, his hands on his midriff. "What do you mean?" "There's something going on with you, tell me babygirl." Chris pleaded with you, stepping over to you and setting his hands on your hips, this time you didn't move away. There was a ball in your throat, a spiky & round ball. Not literally, but it sure as hell felt like it. It was like barbed wire was surrounding your neck.

"It's really nothing, I'm okay." You insisted but Chris wasn't having it. With both hands, he pulled you closer to him, sliding his left hand up to your face, caressing it carefully. "Talk to me." Chris whispered to you, pressing his forehead to yours. Chris felt like something serious had happened. You think the last thing he imagines is wrong is your own personal insecurities.

"Do you think my body is unattractive? Do you think I'm too big or something?" You asked him, looking down at your feet, you weren't wearing any socks, your toe nails recently got done, no shame in showing them off. "What? Are you being serious princess?" Chris wondered, now both of his hands were running your warm felt cheeks. "Yes, it's a serious question." "Babygirl, I think your body is the most attractive thing in the world. You're so beautiful. Where is this coming from?" He praised you, it made you feel so good on the inside.

You didn't say anything for a good bit. You honestly didn't know what to say. Deep down, there were many reasons. Your mind didn't allow you to live your body for what it was. Not only that, you fear Chris finds the women at work to be more fit & good looking than you. He always reassures you it's the opposite and that he doesn't find any other women even remotely attractive. It's the most heartbreaking feeling, that your partner doesn't find you beautiful anymore.

"I was looking at myself in the mirror today and realized my body isn't how it was when we first started dating. I've gained weight... Not a lot but some..." You explained, it felt so uplifting to get it off your chest. Chris gazed at you and released a quiet snort as he listened to what you were saying. "I think it's so damn sexy that you've gained weight, you're treating it like you're obese or something and even if you were, I'd be here to help you and to take care of you, like any good boyfriend should." Chris told her, playing with her hair somewhat.

"Is this what's been on your mind all day? Your weight? Baby, you're literally breathtaking." He expressed to you, his sweet brown eyes set on your's. "I don't know..." You said with hesitation. "Oh but I know." He reassured you. "What can I do to prove to you I'm right and the wrong?" Chris snickered, letting go of your blushed face. "Nothing... I'll just have to get over it." You complained, rubbing your eyes as if you blind yourself from your body.

"Don't cover the mirror up ever again. You're the most beautiful woman in the world." Chris spoke, stern in his tone. "Come here." Chris mumbled out as he pulled you into a deep & passionate kiss. His hands pulling you into him from your lower back. "Don't talk badly about my girl." Chris chuckled into the kiss, his lips rapid against yours. "Promise me you won't baby." "I promise." You said, you didn't know if you fully meant it or not.

His hands roamed all over your body. Did he truly admire you? Was he being truthful? You hope so. His hands found their way to your ass as he squeezed his hands on it firmly, grunting into the longful kiss. "Mmm." You whimpered, your hands placed on his chest as you randomly scrunched your hands onto his tight shirt. It was a full-on make out now. You didn't mind though. "Chris..." You whispered as his lips trailed from your yearning lips and onto your thin jawline.

"Hmm?" He hummed out, his soothing lips marking their territory on your face. "I want you..." You whispered out, your hands slowly slithering down his chest, to his abs then to his belt. He was wearing a brown leather belt, it was apart of his work gear. "You want me to fuck you?" He panted out, stopping his repeated kisses for now. "Mhm." "I'll fuck you so hard right now if you just tell me it's what you want." He paused, "I'll do anything for you." Chris noted.

"I want you, I want you to fuck me." You begged of him, kissing him again, inhaling harshly whilst doing so. Chris lifted you up by your thighs, his ripped arms grasping them. A surprised gasp emitted from you as a giggled did too. "I'm gonna show you just how much I love you and your entire body. Every single part of it." Him saying that made your core soak, he really knew what to say. He made you feel so much better. He was so fucking perfect. "You're perfect." You uttered out as you brought your arms around his neck.

You could feel the wetness from your center soaking through your panties. You didn't know how he always managed to get you like this. The arousal you feel currently is immense and all you want more than anything is for him to rail the ever living life out of you. As he held you close, Chris layed you down on the bed gently, making sure you didn't get hurt in the process. He was rough, but not rough enough to actually injure you. Your head hit the soft, silk pillow, it felt comfortable.

Chris pulled away from your body slowly, his hand going to his belt and unbuckling it. The entire time he did that, he looked at you dead in the eyes, it felt extremely intimate. "Can't believe you think badly of yourself... Just look at you..." Chris said with pure love. He spoke from the heart. His heart told the truth. He genuinely loves you more than anything, even if you'll never know that. He slipped his belt out through the loops of his jeans, tossing it onto the wooden floor swiftly before drawing his body back on top of yours.

You stroked his cheeks softly, his scruff running against your thin fingers. You felt his big hands trail down your body and down to your shorts, his thumbs latching onto the elastic waistband. "Already?" You questioned, wondering why he wasn't going to start with foreplay. You don't know why but the feeling of when he teases you makes it so when he fucks you so much better. "Sorry baby, I just can't wait." He snickered, he pulled off your shorts which ended with your legs being spread open to his liking.

The underwear you were wearing had lacey trim on it, it wasn't a thong, you'd never wear one. "Cute." Chris complimented them, giving you a playful smirk before bringing himself back down to you, pressing his lips against yours in a heated kiss. You opened your mouth slightly and moaned as you felt his tounge slip into it, exploring your mouth and taking control of it. You also felt his right hand glide down between yours legs but he hadn't done anything yet.

Both of your hands went to his back, reaching down and ripping off his shirt speedily. You loved his body. Hopefully just as much as he loved yours. Chris allowed you take off his shirt, his lower half then his upper half being revealed. The sunlight from outside of the window beamed on him, it made him look even sexier, especially when it'd shine into his brown eyes, he was so handsome, it was overwhelming.

Your nails lightly trailed down his front, feeling his pecks was like heaven. The tiny amount of chest hair was so attractive too, his facial hair overall was a turn on. The feeling of his scruff on your dripping cunt whenever he eats you out is enough to bring your orgasm closer. Just thinking about it makes you wanna ride his face. Your guy's tongues were in a dance battle as you made out. You wrapped your legs around his waist, making it so he couldn't move away at all.

"You dirty girl..." Chris chuckled, towing his mouth away from yours, it made you pout a bit. Chris lifted his boy up slightly and slid his hand to your crotch as two of his fingers found their way to your clit. "Shit." You mumbled dully, biting your lip as he rubbed circles on it. He could most definitely feel how fucking soaked you were. It was too much. You couldn't help it though. Chris was just something else. "Does that feel good?" "Mhm." You whimpered out, opening your legs a teeny bit more, your mouth gapped out as whiny noises came out from it.

As he fondled your clit, you couldn't help but begin to breath heavier. The way he'd rub it fast then more slow was painful, you just wanted release but then again, it felt so good. "You're so beautiful. I don't know how you can't see that." Chris's coos to you meant everything. The way he'd talk about you made you feel affirmed. "Fuck." You groaned, your nails digging into his back which only nudged him to pleasure you faster.

Whilst he was pleasing you, he gazed into your eyes with thirst. Oh you could just tell he wanted you. No. He needed you. Even Chris was getting pleasure out of this despite not being the one getting pleased. "Go faster." You whined out, your legs wobbling as you focused on the sensational feeling he was providing you. When you requested him to do it quicker, he obliged, now using three fingers to stroke your clit, causing your thick hips to buck up. "Oh!" You shrieked out, an adorable giggle coming out as well.

"Chris... Oh it feels so nice." You keened, biting your lip and throwing your head back as he stroked you perfectly. "You're so wet for me." Chris praised, "You're doing so good." He went on, kissing your pretty little neck as he slowed down on the rubbing, he could tell you were getting close due to your mannerisms. "I'm gonna cum." You muttered out to him, you were practically riding his fingers at this point. "Hold out a little bit longer princess, I know you can do it." Chris mumbled against your neck, licking up it before planting gentle kisses behind your pristine ear.

"My sweet girl." Chris said with a drowsy tone as he kissed your ear lobe then pecked you numerous times back down to your collarbone all while still smoothly rubbing you. You could feel your wetness dripping from your center and down your ass, onto the sheets, you two were definitely going to have to remake your bed for the second time today. Wasn't a problem though, cause & effect is a real thing.

Chris caressed your clit at light speed now, he just wanted to see you unfold, to see you lose your sense of reality. "C'mon babygirl... You can do it..." He tittered, staring at you as you squeezed your eyes shut. "No, no, no, look at me." He demanded, using his free hand to grab a hold of your chin sternly. You opened your eyes and gazed back at him, shaky breaths were all that was heard as your orgasm came up from deep within you. It felt so spectacular.

You moaned loudly as your climax hit an all time high. You rode out your high, riding Chris's three fingers as you orgasmed. As you came, Chris fondled your tits, squeezing them and rubbing them, you could feel his erection pressed against your bare thigh. "Fuck Chris." You gasped out, your breath lost as you panted over & over again. His fingers manage to work wonders on you each time he fingers your nub.

"You did so well babygirl, good job." Chris leered, leaning down and giving you a simple smooch. "But I'm not done with you yet." He laughed sincerely before flipping you onto your stomach. It wasn't totally unexpected but you figured he would just fuck you in missionary, this was an amazing surprise. "Oh." You giggled seductively, not even allowing him to pull you up as you set yourself in doggy style instantly, your ass pressed against his manhood. "That's my good girl." Chris chuckled, fondling your ass carefully.

From behind you, you could hear the sound of him unzipping his jeans and pulling them down alongside his underwear too. Your bare ass was already ready for him, the feeling of him inside you was going to be exlierating. Your arms held you up as they rested on the pillows, Chris will hold onto you too, he always does. You could feel his hard length frequently touch your rear, you knew he was ready for you.

"You ready sweetheart?" Chris asked you, wanting consent. His hands were already on your waist, it felt like he was also gripping onto your tank top. "Yes baby." You responded, moving your ass on his pelvic area. You could hear a grunt from Chris as he held onto his cock before he then swiped it up and down through your wetness. This caused you to sigh softly, his tip went over your sensitive clit. "Oh." You moaned into your arms, your head lifted above the pillows.

Chris held onto you tightly as he pushed himself into you, you could feel all of him, it felt never ending. "Oh babygirl." Chris groaned out, his fingers digging into your waist as his member was now buried deep inside of you. He began to thrust in & out of you carefully, taking in all the pleasure he was receiving from it. "You're so tight princess." He praised you. Chris was obsessed with how you felt around him. The way your core clenched, it was like your cunt was made for him.

He pumped himself out of you, basically pulling all the way out before slamming himself back in, ending up with you moaning into the pillow. He wasted no time with this. His right hand slid up your back and held onto the back of your neck, as if he was mounting you. He slammed himself into you over and over, and over again. You could hear muffled grunts & moans coming from Chris, he was enjoying this just as much, if not more, than you.

Going from slow and cautious to rough and passionate, you couldn't tell what his next move was going to be. You could feel yourself grip around him, were you already close again? That dick has some power to it. "My beautiful girl." Chris boasted out from behind you, his front hitting your ass roughly whenever he'd slide back into you with ease. Your wetness was like it's own lubrication. You two rarely ever had to use the real stuff, that's how wet you tend to get for him. He just does something to you that's indescribable.

His hand moved up to your head now, his fine fingers running through your hair. You knew what he was going to do, it was just a matter of when. Now, all that was able to be heard was your skin slapping together and your wetness squelching each time he fucked into your sopping cunt. "Keep taking it babygirl." Chris stated as he continued to fuck into you, his strokes turning into long & deep thrusts.

As he slowed down, his hand dug into your hair, lifting your head up as he officially sped up. "Oh fuck..." You moaned out hushly as he dug his free hand into your stomach. All he was doing was admiring you & your divine body. He was still appalled with how you were talking about yourself earlier. He genuinely finds you to be the sexiest woman to ever roam the planet Earth. You are his world.

"You're so fucking hot." He grunted out, his voice husky. You realized he was almost at his breaking point. You could feel his cock twitching and squeaming inside of you. You could just imagine how much he was pulsating. Your clit still felt like it was. Each one of his fingers held onto thick strands of your hair as he thrusted into you at a crazy pace. "Says you." You stifled out, your freshly manicured nails going hog wild on the bedsheets.

Switching from just grasping strands of your hair, Chris let go for a millisecond before using his entire hand to grab a full fist of your hair, resulting in your back arching even further. "Oh yeah." Chris panted, his left hand smacking your rear, not too hard though, he still feels bad for how rough he was last time...

"Chris, I'm so close." You winced out to him, attempting to look back at him but his hand wasn't allowing you as it just kept you in place. "I know princess, I know. Me too." Chris grumbled, heavy heaving emitted from his throat. Chris unburied his hand in your hair and swiftly convoyed it to the front of your neck, choking you lightly as he moved into you again, this thrust was your complete & utter undoing, your second orgasm of the day.

You gripped the sheets so hard, your knuckles turned white. You felt your core clench around him in an instant. Your stomach felt like it was burning with pure passion & lust. "Oh fuck me, oh my God." You moaned out, practically screaming. Chris's hand immediately covered your mouth, your eyes widening. "Jesus baby, you wanna get people to hear you?" Chris chortled, slowing down but still giving you pressed movements. He was about to nut.

"Fuck babygirl." Chris exclaimed as he released inside of you. His cum dropped from your cunt and onto the bed, you lathered his dick in it too. "Oh my Gosh." You soughed, plopping onto the bed like a ragdoll after Chris pulled out of you, laying right beside you. "You were fucking amazing." Chris snickered as he grabbed you, nestling his head into the crook of your neck and suckling on it. "So were you." You whispered, tossing your hand up to the top of his head, messing with his fluffy hair.

He kissed down your shoulder all while making eye contact with you. "Don't ever talk badly about your body. I just fucked the life out of you, I wouldn't do that if I didn't find you to be beautiful." He assured you, leaning up & kissing your nose with calmness. You grabbed ahold of the blanket that was once on the mirror and covered the two of you up with it as you placed your head onto his chest. "Thank you honey." You expressed, trailing your finger tips along the lines of his abs. "Always beautiful." He mumbled, kissing the top of your head, chuckling at your now frizzy hair.

[thatgirl4815]

Ray's Feelings

Ray's process of falling in love with Sand has such nuance to it that I think gets horribly overshadowed by his actions alone, not their context. Yes, Ray mistreats Sand. Yes, Ray has a lot to apologize for. But I think Ray is a broken person who has a lot to apologize for because he's in a situation that he is grossly under-equipped, both mentally and emotionally, to handle.

@victorialovesstiles' post here includes a great discussion of the moment Ray becomes fully aware of Sand's feelings for him in Ep8. Up to this point, I don't think Ray tried to pin down exactly how he felt for Sand because the situation didn't necessitate it. He and Sand were "friends," and that label was always fine with Ray, until it wasn't enough anymore, until Sand couldn't put up with it. Looking back on all of this progression, I'd argue Ray has had feelings for Sand for as long as Sand has had feelings for him, but he hasn't been in a place to confront them the same way Sand has. It makes sense given that Sand is the one in the bad spot, watching Ray chase after Mew. If their situations had been reversed, I think Ray would've had to contend with his feelings much more directly much earlier.

Ray makes comments like this that point to the depth of his feelings, but he never truly vocalizes them outright until later in Ep9. Ray realizing how happy he is with Sand and admitting to that is the first step in the recognition of his true feelings, that he sees Sand as more than a good friend who takes care of him and just so happens to sleep with him.

Ray's feelings are strong, but they are also delicate, as demonstrated by the fight at Sand's apartment in Ep10. This dialogue in particular:

Ray thinks he deserves to be upset for having his emotions played with, which says more than anything how much Ep9 meant to him. It's also important in the context of money, because Ray's self-worth is so heavily influenced by what he can offer other people: if nothing else, he has always had his wealth to fall back on. And here is Sand claiming to love him, but all Ray can see is someone who accepted payment. Every conversation they’ve about the separation of feelings and money is being put into question.

At the end of Ep10, Ray echoes his dialogue in Ep8. I personally like that Ray makes a point of saying how happy he is with Sand; what stands out to me here is that Ray is confessing this to imaginary Sand, so he's technically only really admitting it to himself. He makes me happy and I keep screwing it up. He does care, and he's always cared, but I can't do anything but ruin it. I was made to ruin things. Those are all thoughts that seem to lay at the core of his dialogue at the end of Ep10.

I guess my main point here is that we witness Ray returning to this idea time and time again that when he's with Sand, he's truly happy. Sand sees beyond his problems, beyond the brokenness. Even with how complex their situation is, there's something so beautiful about that simplicity. Sand makes Ray happy. That’s what it’s always boiled down to.

"I know now that you want nothing from me" -> I have a feeling this entire speech from Ray is going to form a deeper trust between Ray and Sand. Ray knows now that Sand is true. He knows that he has overthought everything. The reason why Ray skews the situation with Sand is because Ray is so used to viewing himself in a negative light, but he was clinging to the hope that Sand didn't see him that way. Even when other characters insult Ray for his behavior (which isn't entirely undeserved), Sand was always there to explain why he was wrong, to encourage him to be better. When it's Sand, it's about growth, not just recognition.

The ending scene in Ep10 is such a catharsis because Ray is finally coming to terms with the fact that virtually all of the doubts and complexities surrounding his relationship with Sand were created by him. But Sand has always been true. Sand has always loved him. And now that he sees that, he knows just how important it is that he clings to that love and never lets it go.

[deadpool15]

Let me

Beautiful. The only word fit to describe the Targaryen’s as a whole. They are viewed if nothing above society. Closer to the gods than men, as many would like to say. Though there is something quite different when it comes to Aemond Targaryen. The man is gorgeous, the most beautiful specimen you’ll ever encounter. There are times where I realize I don’t compare to such beauty or the royal life in general. You see, I have indeed grown from the silence and embarrassment I faced upon arrival. “You are to be wedded, a fine gentleman if I do say so myself. A match meant to bring forth unity for both houses. Securing us many things across Westeros.”

The words that had changed my life, in which I didn’t know at the time would mean for the better or worse. The life of status is quite new to me, from a certain age the idea of being a proper lady had been instilled in my brain. Then, a match as my grandfather believed the gods before us made themselves came along, the prince of House Targaryen wanted a wife. Aemond was the silent type, one couldn’t exactly understand what was going on with him. He was a tough one to figure out, and I was anything but patient except when it came to him. My dragon.

Watching as Aemond stepped into our chambers putting down his sword. He spent majority of his time training, I never blamed him for it, especially since he has started training me secretly. It took a while before I fully convinced him into the idea but with a few tricks up my sleeve if you know what I mean, he was on board. He starts to remove his tunic, leaving him in nothing but a pair of trousers. “It almost feels as if I’ve been waiting for hours, maybe centuries, dear husband.” He looks up so exhausted, it seems his usual high perception was gone. Not taking notice of me sitting up in our bed. He breaks out into a small smile.

That smile, it gives me peace. Anxiety and pain are forgotten, replaced with nothing but thoughts of Aemond. “It seems, you’ve decided to retire quite early to the bed chamber, haven’t you, gevī?” He moves toward the bed, caging me beneath his arms. “Yes, it seems that way. Yet, once I got here there was an absence of one’s presence. A person meant to ensure safety and warmth, but they aren’t in this very bed with me right now. If you would like a little help husband, there is currently no one blonde laying in this bed with me for our usual activities. Know any blondes?” Looking at him with a coy smirk he laughs at my statement.

A laugh only I can pull from him. Gives me a sense of grace, that only I have that power over him. “I would hope the only blonde you need is currently in the room with you. He says grabbing my chin firmly. Pushing him on the bed to sit beside me and whisper, “I would think we have the same person in mind, my dragon”. I grab a hold of his face, “in order to make this easier I would enjoy if you are the most comfortable, so let’s just remove this.” As I reach for his eyepatch, he takes a hold of my hand firmly. The other gripping my waist. “It’s just me husband, no one is here to judge or ridicule you. Even if they were they would have to go through me if they wished to talk about such lies.” I tell him while looking directly at his eyes. “They wouldn’t be lies.” He said quickly.

Grabbing both his hands firmly I place kisses on the inside of each palm. I wish for nothing but him to be his true self with me. To know I love him deeply. “You are the most beautiful man I’ve ever witnessed. Any woman should be lucky I even allow them to glance in your direction.” He laughs again, though this time it’s a full belly laugh. Coming straight from the depths of his throat. “You allow them, is that it little wife.” I start to place kisses all over his eye and then I remove the patch, this time he doesn’t stop me. Simply sits there basking in the glory. I grab my special tools. Whisking a brush hidden behind my back, slowly but surely start to smooth out the tangles and knots in his hair.

He finally takes notice of my appearance, a think silk nightgown. Leaving almost nothing to the imagination. For the right person, of course. He smiled holding me closely and placed a kiss on my shoulder blade. “I love you both.” I stop moving the brush, running my hands through his hair. Feels of silk. Glancing down to look at my growing belly and then back at him. Realizing this is paradise. Pulling him even closer, “I love you both as well, my love.”

[drachonia]

𝐛 𝐚 𝐜 𝐤 𝐭 𝐨 𝐛 𝐥 𝐚 𝐜 𝐤 .

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: randomly thought up a little bit of an alternate ending awhile back, actually got to writing it finally today. not sure if i'll continue and turn it into a full series or not.

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: themes of reincarnation and modern setting included. descriptions of gore, major character death, angst and general dark themes. OC name used instead of general MC. spoilers for William’s main route.

Every step that echoed in William’s ears as he made his way to what may as well have been the gallows. He stepped into the dark halls in the Tower of London, faced with dozens of sets of eyes that bore him a falsified sense of ill will.

He knew the hatred was only as deeply rooted as a dull blade was leveled toward him, aiming directly for the space between his ribs. Strangely, the monarch felt a sense of unease as the sharp metal dug into his skin. Though, the sense of unease faded with each breath, an odd hope blooming along with the red that dripped to the floor.

That day in Crown’s headquarters, the heavy wooden door did not open a second time until the breaking of the next dawn, when all was too late.

The scuffing of sturdy shoes echoed on the pavement near Trafalgar Square. Ink-black curls bounced among the crowd as a young woman weaved her way through, huffing in annoyance, hand gripping an envelope, “Goodness knows why the professor wanted me to deliver her letters, I suppose anything to help her this semester…” Elisabeth murmured, brows scrunched as crimson eyes narrowed beneath long lashes. A strong gust pushed through the calm autumn air, causing the lightweight paper to lift like a feather, only to twirl about and land at a dark alleyway’s entrance. The student’s steps faltered for a moment, her brows creasing slightly as she trotted over, picking up the envelope as she cast a bewildered glance down the unfamiliar location that she felt a sort of camaraderie to.

Only when she left to deliver the slightly dirtied envelope did a pair of fine leather shoes step from the alleyway, almost like a ghost.

“Alright, last stop.” Elisabeth breathed a sigh, “Then I can meet up with Allie and Jack and we can all have some of the pie dad sent.” She breathed as she scuffed her mary-janes at the brick road. This letter, she remembered, was specifically mentioned by her professor as one of utmost importance and caution. The young lady thought back on her mentor’s words:

“He’s a distasteful ol’ man, so keep your wits about you when you drop the letter by. Give it to ‘im in person, but leave immediately.”

She sighed out, fingers tightening their grip on the letter slightly as she trotted up to the door, about to knock before noticing that the door was the slightest bit ajar. And against her better judgement, like a girl lured by the promise of adventure, Elisabeth gently pressed it open. The scent of copper hit her nose like a rousing slap to the cheek.

A dizziness filled her head as she looked at yet another strange, yet familiar scene, a dead man’s body — one she could only assume was the intended recipient of the letter she possessed.

“Well, this is a bit troublesome…” a man who couldn’t have been much older than herself frowned, arms crossing as he pushed

“A friend of yours?” A soft but jovial voice reached her ears, she noticed she had been frozen to the spot with a strange sense of deja-vu. Head aching incessantly as it pressed to the front of her skull, claws digging in.

A man with light brown hair stepped in front of the body, blocking her view as he stared down at her, “Look, we’re just here rehearsin’ for a little play at that little theatre not far off from here, nothin’ to see here.” Elisabeth almost found the false smile he put on…comforting and friendly.

“You’re lying.” The words poured out of her mouth instantly, like she’d been bound to a script herself. She had wanted to go home, to go eat a warm dinner with her brother and sister but—

A disappointed sigh reached her ears as she sensed someone behind her, looking over her shoulder to see a young man dressed head to toe with clothes almost as black as his hair. Another joined him, noticeably shorter in stature, but twice as intimidating. He grumbled under his breath, lighting a cigarette with a few curses as he glared past her.

In contrast to the rest of the curious group that surrounded the corpse, one more man stepped in front of her, the brunette from before giving him plenty room. Elisabeth glanced up once more, taking note of the silvery-white hair and carmine eyes. Her breath caught in her throat as his eyes seemed to narrow almost affectionately at her, as if out of instinct.

“It seems that we’ll be bringing her with us.” His eyes never once parted from hers, red-painted fingers brushed her own as he took her hand, Elisabeth’s vision starting to blur and darken the deeper she looked. Those eyes seemed to whisper only one thing, wide with an ever-present, intense heat.

Found you, my sweet robin.

lace headers by saradika.

[nalyra-dreaming]

Thank you for your consistently detailed analysis and speculation which have frequently calmed me down when I was concerned about the direction of the show. As long time VC fan, I'm not gonna lie, this show has often left me heartbroken- and not in a good way. I've been trying to get through it in hopes when we will finally get to see the real Lestat. But honestly, for me, if the drop is left in, than the character is done. There is no way to redeem him. And it just hurts because not only is it something that Lestat would never do to Louis, but it's something that was actually done to *him*. He suffered for years from that fall and it was one of the main reasons he went in the ground. It's important for his character development. I just don't understand the justification for leaving it as is especially since it isn't canon. I don't think I can take another 2+ years of Lestat being called an evil domestic abuser. How can audiences be expected to root for him. They won't. He will be condemned as the monster who dropped his partner from the stratosphere. Leaving it also ruins the L+L QotD flight. I just don't see the point in irrevocably damaging the main protagonist of the entire story. I'm heartbroken and furious. Please, help me understand.

*sighs* (Sending you a big hug.)

So. Emotions seem to be very high on this already, and it hasn't even aired yet. I'm just pointing that out because... what we have right now is hearsay - maybe directly, maybe over a few people in the middle... but ultimately we haven't watched it yet, right? Other people have. Other people, with their own understanding, and their own takes.

And yes, it was done to him. Exactly. And as just said in another ask, he has not told his side of the story yet. The trial, so also that part of it... will definitely be scripted. And we already know that what we were shown... cannot be trusted. Not a 100%.

Let's watch first and then judge, please.

Because so far this show has excelled at elevating the source material.

Which is not to say that they cannot make mistakes, obviously. And who knows, maybe I'll be disappointed AF after. We'll see.

But... there's a reason why they revisit all that. There's a reason. And, given that we're segueing into s3... and therefore Lestat's story?

I don't know how they re-contextualize it. I don't. But I think we need to see the bigger picture - and that won't be done by s2. (And I have a feeling like it might not even be done by s3...)

IF they follow the book IWTV here... then Lestat will testify against Louis and Claudia at the trial, seemingly out of revenge (but actually under duress), he will witness her burn, he will have the yellow dress. Louis and Armand will break up. Lestat and Louis will meet in the later contested NOLA meeting. Louis will end up alone at the end of the novel.

I don't know how the revisit fits with the trial. You probably know my feelings wrt the diary and the pages etc but it seems they are not used as heavily as anticipated.

IDK. Given the in-universe publication of the book IWTV I think they will follow the beats above - and episode 5, and the drop, are likely part of the accusation then.

Now, we know that it will be revealed later that this was done with manipulation and torture. That it was Lestat who was thrown off the tower later, and who needed decades to heal. Which fits with the "mind call" in 2x05, doesn't it.

IDK. I just want to point out that even if... EVEN IF THAT DROP STAYS FOR NOW - there is a lot more to it and they have already hinted at that.

So.

Yes, I can very well do without another 2 years of shit-show by some people, especially those unwilling to take the step back for the bigger picture. But ... I have become much, much better at blocking.

And I am not going to let them take away my joy. Especially... ESPECIALLY that we know - WE KNOW - that TVL is up in s3. They already confirmed that.

Don't let an unfinished puzzle or some asshats take your joy either, dear.