#i just can't believe this is the most popular couple

[horse-girl-anthy]

The City and the Self: Or, the Uses of Lesbianism

someone in my server recently asked why Ikuhara seems so hung up on lesbians. I gave a short answer which in hindsight doesn't satisfy me. even this post won't touch on everything, there's plenty more that could be said, but here's a stab at a more complete answer, drawing from RGU specifically, though I think these points generalize to YKA as well.

a long time ago--around 2017, I believe--I posted in the RGU tag, asking about differences between how the western and Japanese fanbases see the show. the answer I got surprised me: I was told a popular fan theory held that Utena and Anthy were the same person. this is confirmed in the interview Ikuhara did with Mari Kotani:

Kotani: How did you think about relationships between two women, like the relationships between Utena and Anthy, Juri Arisugawa and Shiori Takatsuki, and so on? Sometimes it is thought of as one girl and her alter ego. Ikuhara: Yes, that's true of course.

at the time, this didn't make sense to me. now, though I don't take the "alter ego" concept literally, I certainly see where these theorists were coming from.

the very first impression the audience gets of the show, the opening seconds of the theme song, depict Utena and Anthy as mirror images of one another. I can't find the post now, but I once saw someone do a face swap of Utena and Anthy... and there was almost no difference in the final result aside from their eye color. yes, the show has somewhat same-y character designs (pointy chins, noses, etc.), and yes, Utena and Anthy are differentiated by coloring and height. however, there are differences in the facial features of the other characters, including other female characters like Juri and Nanami, meaning that you wouldn't get the same result from face swapping them that you do from face swapping Utena and Anthy.

visually, the show is trying to tell you something: Utena and Anthy are counterparts; not "the same person," in that there are clear contrasts between them, but perhaps different aspects of a single self. to put it another way, they cannot be separated from one another; what happens to one of them will affect the other, and how they relate to each other tells you a lot about how they relate to themselves.

RGU is not the first story to have this premise. I just watched Ingmar Bergman's Persona, which uses two women to tell the story of one woman, and that came out all the way back in 1966. I think that it's possible to do this kind of story with characters of different genders--however, it's most often done with homosexual/homosocial pairings because two people of the same gender are seen as better mirrors to one another.

when I initially gave my response as to why Ikuhara writes a lot of lesbians, I cited the influence of shoujo manga. however, I didn't detail how homosexuality was featured in those manga.

Ikuhara once said that the core theme of shoujo is "self-revelation." he wanted to capture that in RGU, and it seems to have come across. consider Takemiya Keiko's reading of RGU as "A story about independence, about finding oneself. It feels like a story about a girl defining 'what is myself?'"

this journey of self-discovery must involve encounter with the other. part of romance is other-longing, the desire to meet the unknown; love requires a separate entity which is not merely an extension of the self (this is why I don't believe that Utena and Anthy actually are "the same person"). through encountering the other, one can find one's own self, and further, through this encounter, the selves which meet can be transformed.

while plenty of 20th century shoujo did center heterosexual couples, I believe that homosexual and homosocial relations were so prevalent because they facilitated this romance more effectively. on a visual level, a homosexual pairing can create a clearer parallel, as discussed above. for a more thematic angle, RGU's lead writer Enokido has mused that homosexuality removes the issue of "genetic advantage" from the equation; since there is not a clear "survival and reproduction" benefit to homosexuality, it is easier to see it as "pure love." along the same lines, Ikuhara has said that "as soon as you see the destination point of producing children, sex becomes a social system." that's not to say that homosexual couples exist independently from social systems. the point is that writers who wish to pursue the idea of "self-discovery through the other" may wish to do so in the context where the norms of heterosexuality are not an issue, as they could muddy the water.

as an example, take Kaze to Ki no Uta, an influence on RGU. Gilbert and Serge, the lead couple, are very different people. often in conflict, their love ends tragically. that is precisely the power of the story: Serge, who is left alone after Gilbert's death, will live the rest of his life feeling incomplete, unwhole, because he has lost the "other self" by which he came to be defined. in Ikuhara's words, "It’s a story about that which forms the core of an artist - a starvation that can never be satiated."

when done properly, this kind of romance can be very moving, because it is not only a "love story" but also a story about the self and its relationship to the other. and even more potent are stories which are both about "finding one's other self" and about "the city":

Ikuhara: Out of your works, I particularly like the stories about cities... Stories of cities and “one’s other self” are enchanting aren’t they. There are a lot of shoujo mangaka who write about one’s other self, but there aren’t really any who write about cities. I think a story is weak if it only talks about relatives and neighbours and never about cities. In contrast, I think your stories which are simultaneously about cities really bring out their era. I think that allows you to mark out a line for the story of the other self. Takemiya: Personally, I feel at a basic level that stories without a sense of daily life aren’t very interesting. If one thinks of each person as a single cell, then the city becomes the “body”, and one cannot create a world without both. Based on where they live, some people become more modern or more provincial - the environment really plays a role. For me, it is a necessary component.

I agree with this exchange: the best stories about "one's other self" aren't solely about love between two people, but instead love between two people placed in a particular social context. it is that social context which gives the relationship flavor.

this brings us to the other reason that lesbianism (and homosexuality more broadly) is used in Ikuhara's works. not only does it allow him to tell stories about "one's other self," but also to tell stories about social systems. homosexuality is "deviant" within the social system that is set up to produce children in the nuclear family; thus, homosexual couples will face resistence and prejudice. as Ikuhara discussed in this interview, he is not necessarily trying to capture "the lesbian experience" in his works, but rather using lesbianism as an allegory for the sense of being a minority; a person outcast for standing out from the crowd. homosexuality thus allows for a marriage between the themes of "the self" and "the city" which are central to the telling of a great romance.

bringing it full circle, let's take a look at how this plays out in Utena and Anthy's dynamic, specifically the climax of the first arc. in the build up to it, Utena has been insisting that Anthy behave like a "normal girl," and believes she's succeeding in this venture. however, her illusions are crushed when Touga defeats her in the duel called Conviction. Anthy, now his bride, tells Utena that she likes being the Rose Bride and doesn't mind being alone.

Utena's reaction to this is interesting. suddenly, she is obsessed with being a "normal girl" herself, deftly signaling that all along, she was projecting her own conceptions onto Anthy. though she comes to realize this, Utena ultimately decides to duel again; in the episode 11 preview, she says, "Himemiya, wait! I have to try to get the real you and the real me back!" their selves are linked, tied; Utena cannot be herself without Anthy. what's more, the "false self" that Utena presents is linked to Anthy's "false self"--for, despite her words, it is quite difficult to believe that she "enjoys" being the Rose Bride, any more than Utena "enjoys" wearing girl's clothes. after Utena wins the duel called Self, she and Anthy meet again, paralleling the end of the first episode, but when Anthy tries to impart the rules of the rose crest, Utena tells her, "never mind all that, let's just go home." the two share a moment of authenticity, their "false selves" blown away like petals in the wind. they've drawn closer to each other and to who they truly are, while simultaneously gaining a level of independence from the system which seeks to define them by their gender. the rest of the show will play out in the same manner.

----

side note: I don't think that Ikuhara is more fixated on lesbianism than he is on male homosexuality; however, I'm not sure if he's focused on "mirroring" between homosexual males the same way he has between females, despite the fact that his cited inspiration for the way he wrote relationships between girls in RGU is yaoi.

[tbgkaru-woh]

hi! i was just wondering what it is specifically that you dislike about wangxian? i'm kind of intrigued, because while i get how someone could find them boring, i've never really considered anything about their dynamic (and as you mentioned in response to a previous anon, their confession scene) particularly off putting. no pressure to answer this, and this is in no way hate towards you i'm just genuinely curious <3 (i love your art by the way it's gorgeous)

Thank you for the compliment! ♥ This is gonna get ranty so I will hide it below read more as not everyone has to deal with reading this, so proceed with caution :'D

Wangxian is the weakest WWX dynamic. On god, even if I'm not fond of Yanli, they have very loving relationship where they are protective of each other and gentle with each other in a harsh world. I don't ship WWX/JC but their story and complicated love of someone you grow up with and care for deeply but clash constantly with is more interesting than anything wangxian ever had. Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian clicked together so naturally, they are chaotic and are similiarly not too interested in being up to rules. Jin Zixuan and WWX had a potential of going from enemies to partners in crime, to become family and have each other's backs but JZX was cut short and WWX never really cared afterwards either. WWX with the wens took time to build up but his YLLZ farmer era was one of the best WWX's in the story. Damn, even Lan Xichen who's always amused with WWX's temperament and secretly has a drink with wwx and is altogether looser with the rules while still being lawful matches with him way more than LWJ where there's... nothing. They were smashed together for convenience and we were suppossed to just go with it cause they are the two main characters. LWJ feels like he was just made so WWX has a "hot stoic top" to fuck him and the rest of the characters are actually build with the story and therefore feel more natural

Wangxian don't feel like they are in love, not in the way the fans make them out to be into some romantic picture perfect angsty deserved lovestory. LWJ's personal space is constantly disrespected, he's punished constantly for WWX's mistakes, he constantly needs to be the one to adjust to how WWX is instead of the other way around and after all that, LWJ doesn't really /know/ WWX so his attraction feels very idealized. WWX is the bad boy that goes against the rules and LWJ wishes he could be that (or with that) but it's almost a childish infatuation from their Gusu days that never evolved into something more mature. And WWX? I can't see how he'd like LWJ as anything more than in a physical sense. Even their obnoxious "Back then I wanted to sleep with you" confession scene is purely physical. He doesn't really know LWJ or respects him, LWJ is just a familiar face in a world that is against WWX and he's a hot body that likes him. LWJ is an easy score in a way, he's a safe option. And it'd be SO interesting if they went into that, but instead it's played like the only true love (dont forget, they are meant to be as the ONLY gay pairing in MDZS which I find insane when everyone else has more chemistry and in the end gets shat on so wangxian can fuck in a bush. I mean, LWJ leaves LXC to be depressed and alone after everything LXC stands for and did? Fucking ridiculous.)

It tries to "subvert" tropes but ends up being more stereotypical than anything. WWX was almost meant as this jock-y rebellious hotshot but instead we got a quirky twink, early 2000s shonen protagonist and every yaoi's Uke I've been seeing since like 2008. Are they suppossed to be different because the "stoic white-coded" one is not the bottom? Is the bar this low? If anything, this ornament top is the most usual top, let's be real, LWJ barely has personality or growth or focus, he's there to fuck WWX.

This is a petty reason but MXTX's "wangxian is the only gay couple" everyone else being implied straight as if to highlight just how real their love is that they are gay in time period where it's frowned upon, even though Yi City and 3zun combinations had more chemistry than anyone is. Annoying. And so is the "Don't ship them with anyone else and don't switch their dynamics" that fuels some of the most obnoxious people in the fandom to go after fanwork creators that do/like things differently.

All in all Wangxian is THE face of danmei, they are the most known even outside of danmei circles and they are extremely mediocry written for that. I mean, fuck, you put straight couple in their place and I guarantee no one would like it, it has the depth of a high school hormone-riddled couple who have different classes and "only" get to see each other during breaks and make out during lunch with others at the table, idk it's so fucking annoying to me when I know there were better options, when WWX had so many interesting dynamics that got shat on in favor of bland ass ship and I'm tired of having to like it/tolerate it just because it's gay.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk, this was extremely healing 🤣

[celestialholz]

Live long and fuck in Hondas (or 'why that Vulcan salute is way more significant than you think it is')

Hey. Hey Holz. Did you know Deadpool and Wolverine fucked in the Odyessy? Did you know that they now live in a one-bed with Blind Al? Did you know that -

Yes, friend. I know all of it. And you're all super fucking valid for pointing it out.

... But maybe all of you aren't seasoned Trekkies like me. Maybe not all of you gorgeous people understand the true significance of this.

Or maybe you just want a definitive way to win the argument of "are these two fucking?"

But either way, I'm here to help, and to tell you why, amongst all the absurdly homoerotic text of this film, this moment? Might be the gayest of them all.

Now, we must start by saying that although you wouldn't know it from the bullshit Abrams films, these two:

Are the fathers of gay fanfiction. Spock and Kirk here are the reason you're living in the fantastic timeline where you can write/read men fucking without any other shred of plot and that this is a legitimate and normalised internet experience - everyone say thank you, iconic papas. These guys were so homoerotically coded that even in the 60s, the era of wondrously overdramatic performances of all kinds and fairly prevalent homophobia, The Girlies still took notice, still started mailing each other fics and making zines and being just hugely excited at the thought of these two getting space-married. They are fandom as we know it today's beginning, and seventy years later they're still an enduringly popular ship on AO3. (You should all go and watch Amok Time, by the way. Contains the Honda Odyessy scene of the 60s, except there's weird biology and wrestling and just go and put it on your screens, thank me later. They fucked on that planet.)

Anyway, these two were as close as early colour TV could ever allow two men to be, deepening their *coughs* friendship almost every single episode or film - Trek's creator Gene Roddenberry even gave them a unique word in Spock's Vulcan language, with the meaning of 'friend, brother, lover.' (And if that isn't ringing any Poolverine bells, I'm not actually sure what you want out of this post. Enjoy it anyway, love you.)

... And then we get to 1982's The Wrath of Khan, and to that moment that every iconic screen couple must face - the ol' classic, it's you or me and I won't let it be you.

Sure, the set-up's a little different here - the chamber Spock's in is filled with radiation, and the scene's quieter, softer. And Kirk isn't a mutant so he can't smash his way in, he can just sit there and inwardly die as his emotional support Vulcan does.

... But you get where I'm coming from here. Ryan Reynolds doesn't take a million other potential love scenes from across the cinematic ages - no, he takes this. What is for many the romantic acknowledgement of a whole generation. The humble and desperately sweet beginning of it everything we fans know and love nowadays. The most ambiguously romantic homosexual relationship in television, directly comparative to what is now arguably the most ambiguously romantic homosexual relationship in cinema. And lest we forget, Wade doesn't believe in a fourth wall - this is a conscious choice, both in canon and in the writer's room.

Oh it's so clever and so beautiful a girl could weep. Ryan just introduced the MCU to the gays, just as Kirk and Spock did all those years ago to the masses of the time.

And then there's what it means.

This is the Vulcan salute, created to mean either 'live long and prosper' or 'peace and long life' - it's used more or less interchangeably.

But part of that's irrelevant when you're as immortal as these two.

So we're left with the sentiments of prosperity and peace, given to a man who up to this point can't imagine ever prospering again, is the furthest thing away from being at peace. Wade gives Logan the opportunity to go on, to find the things he's been lacking for so long now - things he has already helped him find. Spock tells Kirk during The Wrath that 'the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few,' and that's exactly what Wade's doing here - sacrificing himself for the greater good of his friends and his newly beloved, however much it will hurt them all.

And that's lovely, and poignant, and character-growing, and I think we all would have been content to leave it at that and have our noble sacrifice, however much we would have wept. Kirk goes on to find the remnants of Spock's soul in the next film in the series, to bring him essentially back from the dead because he felt it was more than his own soul's worth not to have done... which, again, ringing a bell anyone?

Because Logan, in not so many words, tells dear Wade to fuck right off, and we get this.

What we've got here is a direct translation of one of cinema's gayest moments, made somehow infinitely more gay. A true achievement here - I genuinely think I spontaneously acquired tetanus in the cinema for a good minute, my jaw dropped so hard on seeing this. The pillars are the same colour as Kirk and Spock's original uniforms, for fuck's sake. I'm dying out here.

What we've done here is create narrative equality. The whole film's kinda done that leading up to this anyway - they're both mentally fucked up men who can't die, who are constantly dying anyway, who are evenly-matched in battle and both enjoy Honda fucking, who have forged a real love even as they piss each other off at every turn.

But here, they place one another in narrative equality for the first time. It's not about a sacrifice, not now, even though they're assuming it is one - it's about what should be done. It's about righting wrongs, being heroes, being together because every option other than that is unacceptable, because neither understands quite how to lose anyone else. They've both made the same choice, and that's not to let the other die alone.

It's about holding hands and loving and never letting go, even if it kills them.

... It's just about the most romantic and gorgeous thing I've ever fucking seen.

There are no more instances of masks, once they're done in this station. They don't need them any longer; they will never need them again.

And that's only emphasised by the parting shot we get of this... almost directly after Vanessa and Wade share a final sweet look.

I don't know, man. It's almost like the true conclusion is hidden behind the acceptable masquerade. Imagine that in the MCU, folks.

They've taken one of the most intimate and sweet moments in screen history, and made even more glorious.

They did The Wrath of Khan better than The Wrath of Khan did it.

And that's... that's gay. That's just about the gayest thing they could ever have done, and I adore it to the smallest pieces.

So remember, the next time your friends disbelieve you... show 'em this. Show them that they redid the very beginnings of slash fandom, and did it better.

(And then you can add on that they now live in a one-bed with their grandma, daughter and dog, and will do for the rest of their lives. Kirk and Spock didn't even get THAT shit.)

[dresshistorynerd]

The Morrisian case against fast fashion

Today I discovered that H&M made a William Morris collection some years ago. The heath death of the universe can't come quickly enough. We can stop now. Satire is dead and we killed her.

It's not just the whole concept of H&M using William Morris' designs for their fast fashion which is insanity inducing, but also the critical response it garnered. Like sure, people did realize this is insane and there was a lot of think pieces about it at the time, but I read several of them and they all seem to still miss the point in spectacular way.

The basic premise of these think pieces go along the lines of: "Would William Morris spin in his grave with a speed of light because of the H&M collection of his designs? A difficult question indeed. William Morris was a complicated man. He wanted art to be affordable to everyone. Isn't H&M affordable? That kinda fits. Though probably he would have some concerns about H&M's practices."

On the surface - yes - but like in reality - fuck no. There's no nuance in this particular issue. He talked about many times what he though of the H&Ms of his time, the retailers selling poor quality industrially produced "fashionable" bullshit. We know exactly what he would have thought of H&M. Here's couple of quotes from his 1884 lecture "Art and Socialism", which makes it very clear.

"It would be an instructive day's work for any one of us who is strong enough to walk through two or three of the principal streets of London on a week-day, and take accurate note of everything in the shop windows which is embarrassing or superfluous to the daily life of a serious man. Nay, the most of these things no one, serious or unserious, wants at all; only a foolish habit makes even the lightest-minded of us suppose that he wants them, and to many people even of those who buy them they are obvious encumbrances to real work, thought and pleasure. But I beg you to think of the enormous mass of men who are occupied with this miserable trumpery, from the engineers who have had to make the machines for making them, down to the hapless clerks who sit day-long year after year in the horrible dens wherein the wholesale exchange of them is transacted, and the shopmen, who not daring to call their souls their own, retail them amidst numberless insults which they must not resent, to the idle public which doesn't want them but buys them to be bored by them and sick to death of them."

He is describing the birth of consumerism, which was taking form during his lifetime in the late Victorian Era, which fast fashion is the extreme logical conclusion of, and he fucking hated it. He specifically railed against endless consumerist products, which H&M is the perfect representation of. It was definitely not the art and beauty he believed everyone required and deserved. He makes the distinction often.

"Now if we are to have popular Art, or indeed Art of any kind, we must at once and for all be done with this luxury; it is the supplanter, the changeling of Art; so much so that by those who know of nothing better it has even been taken for Art, the divine solace of human labour, the romance of each day's hard practice of the difficult art of living."

"And here furthermore is at least a little sign whereby to distinguish between a rag of fashion and a work of Art: whereas the toys of fashion when the first gloss is worn off them do become obviously worthless even to the frivolous—a work of Art, be it ever so humble, is long lived; we never tire of it; as long as a scrap hangs together it is valuable and instructive to each new generation. All works of Art in short have the property of becoming venerable amidst decay: and reason good, for from the first there was a soul in them, the thought of man, which will be visible in them so long as the body exists in which they were implanted."

When he thought of popular Art he thought of the craftsmanship of the common people. The art people have made from useful everyday objects with skillful handicrafts. This is what he means by "divine solace of human labour". It's not reverence of Puritanical work ethic, on the contrary, it's the reverence of creation, of the earnest joy people feel when they get to express themselves through their creative pursuits. He certainly didn't believe in work for work's sake, work needed to be worthwhile and enjoyable. He summarized his own position on what labour should be thusly:

"It is right and necessary that all men should have work to do which shall be worth doing, and be of itself pleasant to do; and which should he done under such conditions as would make it neither over-wearisome nor over-anxious."

He urged his middle class audience to reject consumerism (the lecture was for a very much middle class atheist society):

"For I say again that in buying these things: 'Tis the lives of men you buy! Will you from mere folly and thoughtlessness make yourselves partakers of the guilt of those who compel their fellow men to labour uselessly?"

I think it's glaringly obvious H&M and fast fashion in general is what he would consider luxury. Rags of fashion that are just churned out and discarded without thought and produced by compelling people to labour uselessly. It's not popular art that's made by workers and craftsmen, who are able to express themselves through it. There's no agency for the abused workers in H&M's sweatshops, they are not expressing their joy of creation, they are simply labouring uselessly.

Morris didn't shame workers for buying affortable things even if they weren't Art with big A, because that's the problem he despised the whole economic system for, for taking away the popular Art from people, making it inaccessible, and selling back mass produced products with very little practical or aesthetic value. So I don't think he would have problem with people who can only afford fast fashion today. They are the victims of capitalism too, because Art has been taken away from them. But the idea that some of these think pieces had that perhaps the H&M's Morris collection can be good actually if you squint, that H&M has the capacity to bring the art and beauty Morris advocated for for the people, is level of stupidity that's hard to express in words.

Morris didn't believe anything made with exploited labour could be truly beautiful, truly art. In his 1879 lecture "The Art of the People" he put it like this:

"That thing which I understand by real art is the expression by man of his pleasure in labour."

The way I understand this, is that art is communication. Through it we communicate feelings, ideas and thoughts, that is it's purpose. So for that communication to work, for it to be imbued with message, the person making it needs to feel passion and love for it's creation. How can there be love and passion if the hands making the garment belong to a tired exploited worker who has no agency what so ever in their work and can only think about survival to the next day?

Beyond the fundamental exploitativeness of H&M and fast fashion, this collection would still get zero points on aesthetic values from Morris even with his own designs. Because the work itself was such an important part of art for Morris, good design was nothing without good craftsmanship. Good design in his mind was always relative and dependent on it's purpose.

"For everything made by man’s hands has a form, which must be either beautiful or ugly; beautiful if it is in accord with Nature, and helps her; ugly if it is discordant with Nature, and thwarts her; it cannot be indifferent." (The Lesser Arts, 1877)

Here when he says nature, he means the nature of the thing that is made - basically it's purpose and function - and the nature of the materials it's made from. Basically, the design must always be made to bring out the function of the art and the qualities of the material it's made from, not fight against them. This is because he believed handicrafts were uniquely suitable for expressing the love of creation, therefore superior labour, and to really bring out the qualities of the craftsmanship and enjoy the creative process, the design should be suitable for that craft. The other side, which was the joy of using and experiencing art, required the craft to be selected for the suitable purpose. Using poorly functioning furniture for example is not very enjoyable, nor is using clothing that's made from materials that are not suitable for the climactic conditions it's supposed to be used in.

H&M of course utterly fails in this. They use Morris' designs in fully unsuitable ways. They print patterns made for example for wall papers on poor quality fabrics with synthetics dyes they weren't made for. This line from one blog post I came across really got me: "Therefore, without cheapening the artistic value of Morris’ designs, H&M’s collection offers an unparalleled potential for accessibility to them." No. Fuck no. They do in fact cheapen Morris' designs in every single way possible. Literally this is atrocious.

Despite the popular depiction, Morris wasn't in fact against industrial machinery or industrial art even, or at least he wasn't once his views on art and politics matured. He did think technology was useful, but he thought the people should use industrial methods for the benefit of all, not be enslaved by the industrial machine.

"I have spoken of machinery being used freely for releasing people from the more mechanical and repulsive part of necessary labour; and I know that to some cultivated people, people of the artistic turn of mind, machinery is particularly distasteful, and they will be apt to say you will never get your surroundings pleasant so long as you are surrounded by machinery. I don't quite admit that; it is the allowing machines to be our masters and not our servants that so injures the beauty of life nowadays. In other words, it is the token of the terrible crime we have fallen into of using our control of the powers of Nature for the purpose of enslaving people, we care less meantime of how much happiness we rob their lives of." ("How we live and how we might live", 1887)

However, he thought that the designer should approach it the way they approached any craft, by designing for the strengths of the machine work.

"But if you have to design for machine-work, at least let your design show clearly what it is. Make it mechanical with a vengeance, at the same time as simple at possible. Don't try, for instance, to make a printed plate look like a hand-painted one: make it something which no one would try to do if he were painting by hand..." ("Art and the Beauty of the Earth", 1881)

He did use some machinery for fabric and wall paper printing, but he was very intentional about their use. Still his designs weren't made for the type of methods these modern H&M machinery uses and he did for example use natural dyes. Particularly insulting is that some of the H&M clothes are made from viscose, rayon made with viscose method. Viscose method is extremely toxic and is known to cause long term health consequences for the workers and the people in surrounding areas. This has been well proven knowledge for ages. William Morris' wall paper factory in the beginning used the typical method used at the time which involved arsenic, but once he learned this could pose risks for the workers, he changed the method. Many of the new synthetic dyes were toxic at the time, which is the major reason he so favoured natural dyes, known to not cause health issues for workers or pollute the environment.

The question many of these think pieces about the H&M Morris collection posed was, would Morris disapprove and should we care? The first part of that is very easy to answer. Yes. Of course Morris would disapprove. He is currently powering the whole of British Isles with purely the kinetic energy his grave-spinning produces. Should we care though? If you care about Morris' art, if you want to see more of that kind of art in this world, you should care. Morris' art is not about the superficial qualities. Copying his designs and aesthetics and styles, will only lead to hollow imitations, that are exactly what he described the rags of fashion to be; as the shininess of novelty wears off they will reveal themselves to be soulless, useless and utterly empty. This collection is just that. To see more of the kind of art that makes you feel like his art makes you feel, not just something that reminds you of that feeling, you should focus more on the way the art is made and less on the specific aesthetics. If his vision of labour and art was realised, all art produced of course wouldn't be loved by every person, but all of it would be loved by someone, even if that someone was just the maker. And that would be more worthwhile than every single rag of fast fashion.

I will stop William-Morris-posting now and return to my thesis.

The full texts I quoted here:

Art and Socialism The Art of the People The Lesser Arts How We Live and How We Might Live Art and the Beauty of the Earth

[onlyangel4]

put some clothes on. LS2. SMAU.

logan sargeant x actress!reader

in which logan is dating an actress who is not afraid to do sex scenes and play risque controversial characters so when they hard launchf1 fandom decides that she is not wag material. but logan and reader do not give a fuck.

faceclaim- sydney sweeney

warnings: 18+ sexual content, cursing, slut shaming

author's note: please do keep on sending requests, the more detailed the better! i write written fic and smaus for most of the grid and a handful of associated people.

y/ninsta

liked by zendaya, tomholland, hunterschafer and 1,230,101 others

y/ninsta: save a horse ride a cowboy

view all 13,291 comments

zendaya: you are glowing my love

y/ninsta: that means a lot coming from you, queen of the glow

y/nfan: miss girl you can not just soft launch and leave us like this i stg

user3: guys we have lost her. to a man.

user4: oh y/n i thought what we had was special

logansargeant

liked by alexalbon, danielricciardo, landonorris and 157,601 others

logansargeant: life lately

view all 8,301 comments

f1fan: omg omg logan is soft launching

user6: i'm surprised he even knows what a soft launch is

danielricciardo: i have known who your girl is for like six months and i am still fucking shocked

user8: six months! they have been together that long and we had no idea?

user7: daniel spill who tf is she

alexalbon: finally soft launching the girl that keeps on stealing lily from me

f1wags

liked by f1fan, user9, user10 and 56,798 others

f1wags: admin can not believe that they are typing this right now but logan sargeant just hard launched his relationship with y/n y/ln by attending the season two premiere of euphoria. y/ln plays cassie in the popular show and has won awards for her work but she is also known to play out there characters and do intimate scenes in film. something pretty much unheard of for a wag. what are your thoughts on this couple.

view all 908 comments

user9: my two worlds are colliding i adore y/n and i hate the current discourse around her relationship with logan. yes she plays these characters and films these scenes but it is all for entertainment. she is hollywood's it girl at the moment for a damn good reason.

user10: i can't believe i have seen logan sargeants girlfriend's tits that is mental

user6: that just isn't wag behaviour

user11: not logan dating hollywood's whore

f1fan: she will never be a worthy wag her behaviour is just inappropriate

y/ninsta

liked by logansargeant, danielricciardo, alexademie and 1,923,731 others

y/ninsta: my baby euphoria season two is out now ! i had the best time filming this with my favourite people i hope you all love it as much as i do.

view all 21,438 comments

logansargeant: so proud of you my love

user12: proud of your girlfriend for having sex on tv? you do you boo

danielricciardo: logan introduced me to euphoria and i am fucking addicted

user13: how can you support this relationship

user14: i am both a f1 and y/n fan and i am fucking disgusted by the comments over the post. this is a woman celebrating the release of something that she had worked so hard on and you are all criticing her just because you think you know what is right for her boyfriend. fucking childish.

liked by y/ninsta and logansargeant

logansargeant posted a story tagging y/ninsta

written: so proud of my girl

user15 replied to your story: tell your girl to put her tits away

logansargeant blocked user15

y/ninsta

liked by logansargeant, zendaya, lilymhe and 2,129,091 others

y/ninsta: somebody pinch me ! i collaborated with frankie's bikinis to bring you a line of seven bikinis. the ones featured in these pictures are my three favourites but i wholeheartedly believe that there is a style for everyone in the line. drops on the 1st of may !

view all 21,210 comments

lilymhe: my jaw just dropped you are so hot

alexalbon: can confirm she has not stopped looking at these pictures since you posted them

logansargeant: that's my girl

y/ninsta: say it louder for the people in the back

logansargeant: THAT'S MY GIRL

user17: how can you hate this couple they are the cutest

user18: put some clothes on

user19: put some clothes on

user20: put some clothes on

logansargeant

liked by y/ninsta, danielricciardo, zendaya and 250,982 others

tagged: y/ninsta

logansargeant: please stop telling my girlfriend to put some clothes on it is detrimental to my mental health

view all 9,281 comments

y/insta: they could never make me

logansargeant: exactly what i want to hear babygirl

user20: babygirl! i'm going to go lay in traffic

alexalbon: pr is going to kill you mate

logansargeant: worth it

user21: everyone say sorry mister sargeant it will not happen again

user22: sorry mister sargeant it will not happen again

user23: sorry mister sargeant it will not happen again

user24: sorry mister sargeant it will not happen again

[asunflowerana]

will you go to prom with me?

summary: prom is near, and your sweet, popular friend will do anything to have you as his date.

with: Gojo Satoru.

warnings: yandere behavior, blackmailing (not from satoru), slight blood mentions.

words: 1448.

a/n: i'm just gonna sit back and pretend this didn't give me chills. thinking of turning this into a series, but i'll hold myself from now haha

"Go to prom with me." It's not what you'd expect to hear on a Tuesday morning, right after a wearing History class. Even more so coming from the mouth of no other than Gojo Satoru, the coolest, most desired boy in school.

Yes, you've been friends with him for almost a year. And yes, you get on very well together, crack some side-jokes at classes, sometimes go out to grab some food, do homework at the library, and even stay up at night until sunrise on the phone, freaking out while studying for a math exam that none of you knew about it — or not paying attention, to be more honest. 

So yeah, you're friends. But it's Gojo Satoru we're talking about. And Gojo Satoru is just way out of anyone's league.

You're simply dumbfounded.

"I��" You swallow hard, feeling like you just lost your memory and no longer know how to complete sentences. You're feeling a lot of things, honestly, the guy you've had so many daydreams with saying he wants to have you as his partner, and there you are, a pile of nerves trying to hide the hard, loud way your heart beats inside.

And it's not that you don't want to accept it. Heck, you want to say yes so badly, how many times did you catch yourself watching those sappy rom coms and wondering if you and the white-haired boy would make a fine couple like that. He's the whole package, and if those gorgeous blue eyes and jaw-dropping looks weren't enough, he's also so kind to you, that you can't help but develop a crush.

But as expected, he didn't catch only your attention, but the whole school as well. Kaya Nami, one of the troublemaker cheerleaders, is in the line and does everything she can to make sure nothing gets in her way.

"If I were you, I'd stay away from Satoru Gojo. You won't like having me as an enemy, believe me." She threatened you last Friday, right during PE class. Confused wasn't enough to describe how you felt, but you didn't say anything back to not cause drama, only nodding and watching her head off like nothing happened.

"...I'm sorry, Satoru, but I can't." And unfortunately, that warning was enough to hinder you from making the choice you wanted.

It goes without saying how astounded Gojo was by your answer, that probably being his first time ever being rejected. "What do you mean 'you can't'?" And then his tone dropped an octave, changing to something more seething. "Did someone ask you? You said yesterday to me that you didn't get invited."

"And you're right, I didn't get it." You try to reason, not liking the way he's bothered by your rejection. " it's just... I didn't think you wanted to go with me!" And you didn't lie, even though you said it more as an excuse.

"Well, now you know." He gets closer, almost making you hit your back at the locker behind you. His eyes say he didn't buy any of your excuses. "So, why can't you go? I mean, I know how overwhelming my beauty can be, but you're just as pretty, sweetheart."

His mood suddenly changes to the usual Gojo Satoru, the cheeky guy who enjoys flustering you for fun. Grazing your chin between his index and thumb, he looks deep at you. "I'll give you the best time you ever had. Just be my date."

It takes everything on you to not jump in his arms and let yourself get swept off your feet. Why does he have to make this so difficult? Taking a deep breath, you remember the headache you're gonna get if you don't make the right choice. "Satoru, I'd love to be your date, really. It's just, I think there's someone else that would make a better date than me."

He stares at you with an unreadable expression. You don't know if he got angrier or had enough of your pitiful answers, but you wish you could be able to read only a fraction of Satoru's mind, cause he's staring for too long at you, and you don't know what else to say other than stare back at him.

Finally, he steps back, diverting his gaze to a random spot for a moment before moving to look at you again. Sliding his hands inside his pants pockets, he seems to accept the situation, but you're still not sure of what you see. "I guess you're not changing your mind, huh? Then tell me, who's this 'perfect match'  that you think would be better for me?" He questions with a hint of disdain, but he tries to hide it with a small side smile.

The girl appears in the scene before you can mention her name as if she was waiting for the right opportunity to pounce and make her move on him. By the way your shoulders slump and your eyes lower to the ground, he quickly assumes that she's the person you were talking about earlier and that for some reason, she's making you very uncomfortable. Not you nor Nami noticed the way Gojo glares at a blank spot. Thinking, he mindlessly accepts the blond girl's invitation to lunch, giving you a brief hug before going away. "If that's what you want." He whispers unexpectedly in your ear, offering you a final smile before letting himself be guided to the cafeteria.

You spend the rest of the day wanting to beat yourself for wasting the chance you had to go out with Satoru. You don't talk to him as much during the week, since Nami was making sure to grab every second of his free time at break. It didn't take too long to figure out that both of them would go to prom together, and even though you were the one who made that happen, it still stings to imagine them having a good time.

Prom day arrives, and in the end, no one invites you. It wasn't something completely unexpected, but to be honest, you were hoping that at least one of your friends would be kind enough to want you as a company just so you could all enjoy the "night to remember". Honestly, you didn't want to miss such an important event, and even though there was a chance that you'd make a fool of yourself, it's still your prom, and you have the right to make the most of it, with or without someone.

Kicking away the self-pity, you dressed up and got ready for the special night, wearing that beautiful gown that you remember once showing on Pinterest to Satoru, months before the event. Checking your purse one more time, you catch your phone to ask for a cab, when you hear three familiar knocks on your front door.

Opening your house, you come face to face with someone you never would've imagined seeing at that moment. There stood Gojo Satoru, with a black tuxedo that perfectly accentuates his body, a bouquet of pink camellias in his left hand, glasses off, and a beautiful lopsided smile.

"...Wow." The combo of his honest compliment, his lingering, fond gaze in your direction, and the fact that you made him momentarily speechless, makes your whole self overwhelmed with endearing sensations, especially your warm cheeks.

But that passes too quickly since you don't understand the sudden visit.

"S-Satoru? What are you doing here?" You didn't want this to be the first thing to say to him, but you're so confused, that you don't know what else to say. "I thought you were going out with Nami. Where is she?"

Awakening from the brief trance you provoked in him, the white-haired boy only increases his smile in a rather strange way. " Didn't you know? Mina got in an accident yesterday, she fell from the stairs and ended up breaking her leg."

One more time, you were taken by surprise. As for your friend, he doesn't sound as worried as you imagined he would be after giving this message, but he still makes a respectful pause after saying it.

Satoru also notices your reaction, observing the way you empathetic self got sad for that girl's situation. Little did you know that she got exactly what deserved. And if you looked more closely at your gift, instead of worrying yourself, you'd notice the blood stains around the wrapping paper, the remains of what your future partner did to prove his love.

To his luck, you're just too pure to realize what you don't need to. And for that, Satoru smiles, gazing at you with sparks again.

"So now, will you go to prom with me?"

Reblogs and comments are deeply appreciated 🦋

© asunflowerana 2024

[suiana]

(yandere! fan x gn! idol reader) (cw: murder, stalking, slight nsfw, yandere stuff)

Yoon-Jae likes to think of himself as your biggest fan.

He buys all your albums, attends all your fan-meets, hell, he even buys all your merch! He just wants to support his favourite idol after all.

You deserve it. Really.

He still remembers how you used to be laughed at by the other students for being a nerd.

You, his old high school classmate, the one he's always pined after even when you were a cute geeky nerd that got teased on a daily basis. Those were good times, he thinks. Before your rise to stardom and exposure to the rest of the world. When times were simpler and you were just someone he had a huge crush on because you were so his type. You two didn't even talk to one another but he had already decided that you were his crush. His first and only crush.

Yoon-Jae still finds it hard to believe that time has already passed by just like that. It's been a good couple of years since you two were in the same class, he still can't believe it. Cute, nerdy, and a little bit of a loser. Sure he knows he's popular and attractive, but opposites attract don't they?

He remembers it like yesterday, to when he first decided to act on his growing feelings for you.

It started out with small things. Following you around in public, being your own personal paparazzi. A little click here and there never hurt anyone. Not when you were so beautifully going about doing your things. His breath always hitches whenever he brings his camera up to his shaky blue eyes to snap another picture of you. The perfect you.

It was like you were made for the spotlight. Made for the cameras. I mean, how could you not be? You're perfect. Everything about you is like a blessing from the god's above. Your smiles, your laughter, the way your face would flush a little from laughing too much... Everything about you needed to be framed in a mueseum. Truly a work of art.

Click, Click, Click.

His camera fired away at everything you did. Even the most mundane of things. The tall Korean man estimates he probably had taken about 5000 pictures of you on a day to day basis back when you both were still students. If you ask his present self how many pictures he takes on a daily basis now it would probably be 2 or 3 times more than what he used to take.

In any case, he finds it a little cute how you were completely oblivious to his photo-taking. How you went around your day-to-day life while remaining blissfully unaware of the photos he shot of you.

Then things got a bit worse.

He thought it wasn't enough to just follow you around outside. No, he needed a glimpse into your private life, the one you kept behind closed doors. Yoon-Jae thought it would help him learn more about you.

And it did. It helped him to learn more about your character. About the person that hid behind a pair of thick round glasses and a nervous stutter when around others in class. The person he saw through a rose-eyed lens.

It was as though he got a glimpse into your soul.

So of course he had to continue breaking into your house to see you in your private space. Of course he had to install cameras in your room to observe how you acted when no one else was around. Of course he had to watch you 24/7. Of course he had to.

It was cute seeing you dance and sing around like some famous idol. Your voice was always so soothing that he'd fall asleep while watching you. This was something he never thought the cute little nerd in his class would enjoy doing. But if it makes you happy he'll be more than happy to support it. You were already an idol in his eyes anyway. It's even better if you wanted to act like a real one.

To be honest, he had secretly hoped you'd notice him. He finds it arousing to say the least. To be caught doing such an intimate thing with his beloved muse... It sends his heart racing, sweat rolling down the sides of his pale forehead as his member strains painfully against his sweatpants.

But you never did and he can't tell whether it's a blessing or a curse that you were so oblivious. No matter, the dark haired man can wait. He's always been patient after all. It's something his mom praised him for since he was young.

The more he learned about you, the more Yoon-Jae couldn't help but be a little peeved that you were still being bullied. He couldn't understand why such a sweet thing like yourself would get teased and called names for liking things so passionately. It's cute. So very adoravle. And he absolutely hated it that others would make fun of you for it. He hated it.

So he decided to get rid of them. What is the point of their lives if they couldn't appreciate the perfection that you are? They are the scum of the earth. Vermin who didn't deserve to live.

His usually neat and tidy appearance was a mess by the time he was done getting rid of the first person. He still regrets wear his favourite white shirt to get rid of all these pests. Their filth got all over him after all, blood and tears staining his pristine clothes.

Yoon-Jae remembers his mother horrified expression as she immediately clutched his arms, asking if he was hurt. He had to repeatedly reassure her that he was fine and just doing it for you. Her face immediately relaxed after that.

"You found your other half then? Are they like your father?"

"Mom it's not-"

"You should bring them back soon. I want to meet my son's beloved! I've been waiting for this day for so long!"

The Korean guy was so confused by his mother's words. Love? He never saw what he was doing as love. He thought it was just... doing what he should do. You're perfect so he should devote himself to you. That's how things are, no?

He started questioning himself after that. Did he... love you? Really? I mean, yeah, he did have a crush but it couldn't be love, could it? Love is a really strong word... He thinks he's just giving you the attention and affection you deserve.

In the midst of getting rid of his final victim, he decided to spill his heart out to them.

"I just... I don't know whether I really love them, you know? Like... I'm doing all this but... It's more like, I want them to be safe and protected from all the bad people. And yeah, maybe I wanna get with them too but that's not very important, is it?"

"U-uh..."

His soft black locks stick to his sweaty forehead, his chest heaving slightly as he continues talking about his feelings to the half dead person. Maybe they'll give him some enlightenment? I mean, they decided to harm you... They should at least give him some advice, no?

"Hey, what do you think? Since you decided to make fun of them you probably know right?"

"I-I don't know-"

"What was that?"

"I meant you probably love them! P-Please don't kill me!"

And just like that, it was like a switch was flipped in his brain.

He made quick work of the person... Well, at least they were useful in the end. He supposes they're not totally good for nothing.

Yoon-Jae decides to confess to you the next day. He brings in flowers and sprays his special cologne. He's positive that you'll reject him today, but he doesn't care. He'll just continue to confess until you finally give in and love him back. You're bound to fall for him one day or another.

Sadly, his luck completely failed him that day and you weren't anywhere in sight. At all.

He spent the whole day asking about your whereabouts, fretting over your well-being as his minds spirals into a states of paranoia. Were you kidnapped? Did someone hurt you? Sick? Where the hell were you?!

And that's when he heard it. You got scouted by an entertainment company and moved to a school closer to your agency.

An idol. You were going to become an idol.

It was as though his heart had stopped and his whole world was flipped upside down. Oh.

Oh.

The realization that you were actually going to stand on a grand stage with hundreds of thousands of eyes on you finally settled in and his heart couldn't help but swell with pride. His idol, his beloved idol. The one he loved and would protect to death. Yoon-Jae couldn't help but feel satisfied knowing that some person finally realized your potential. Took them long enough, he mumbles while walking back home with the bouquet of flowers.

Was he sad that he couldn't confess to you? Sure, yeah he was. He's not going to deny it or lie. It really fucking hurt when you weren't there to witness his confession. But the fact that you had actually gone to become an idol... That made everything all better.

He'd finally be able to worship and love you like you were meant to be worshipped. An idol. His idol. He'd be able to prattle and gush about you without receiving any weird looks. Everyone else will be doing the same thing anyway. They can't and won't be able to judge him. In fact, they'd be understanding of why he's so obsessive over you. You're perfect, he repeats. Such perfection is worth losing his mind over. He's sure everyone would agree.

He can't help but grin in excitement as he anticipates your debut. A cute concept? A sexy concept? Both? He thinks that you'd suit everything.

When you finally debuted he feels like he could die at that second. You, in all your glory, was standing in the middle of a stage. A soloist. The sole star of the show. He's glad your agency hadn't put you in a group. He'd feel bad for your other members, already knowing that you'd outshine them all. It's not even up for debate.

It's no surprise that Yoon-Jae's the first to buy all your merchandise. The first one to book tickets to all your shows and fan meets. He's in the front row screaming your name with his heart, blue eyes all wide and cheeks flushed as he publicly displays his devotion for you.

You don't notice him at first, but as time goes by and he continues to support you, he's become a familiar face amongst your ever growing crowd. Yoon-Jae. You hadn't realized that the popular guy in your old class had liked your music so earnestly. Maybe it was a safe haven from the horrible deaths back in your old school. You believed your music to be comforting after all.

His slender hands intertwine with yours as he appears at your fan meet for the nth time. He comes bearing more gifts than before, way too excited to chat to you one-on-one again.

"Darling, darling! You look amazing like usual! I bought this expensive cartier necklace for you today. Do you want me to put it on for you?"

"Haha, of course. You're my sweetest fan! Come put it on for me?"

The lines between idol and fan slowly start to blur to him. Yoon-Jae thinks that you truly mean what you say whereas you were just doing what an idol does. Fan-service.

But Yoon-Jae doesn't care about that. Why would he? You're his other half. He even got his mother to watch your content with him. She says she's eager to meet her son's future spouse. His father is a little bit more reserved, always hiding in his room and reading quietly, not wanting to talk to him. Whatever, he'll meet you one on one when the time comes. And you'll be his when the time comes. Though he loves you as an idol, he loves you as his lover more. The tall black haired guy is already counting down the days to when your contract ends.

For now, he'll continue supporting you as your biggest fan. He always will be your biggest fan even after your career too. You're an idol in his eyes through and through and nothing will change that.

Nothing will ever change that.

[authorhjk1]

Teaching their hoebae the “real” side of the industry. They heard rumors of you making your “rounds” through different idols around your age/generation. And decided they want to see what the fuss was all about. “You’ve fucking all these cute girls trying to act like grown women. So why don’t I show you what a real woman can do with a beautiful cock like this”

You guys send me so many great ideas for SNSD, so I just had to get at least this one off my chest. This got way out of hand, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

Sunbae

(Choi Sooyoung X Male Reader)

"Oh god, yes!"

Ningning's voice echoes through the changing room as you take her from behind.

You usually don't meet other idols that often, since you are in boy group that is mostly keeping to itself within the industry. Your own practice room, your own schedules, your own recording studio and so on. For the last three years, your group has taken Korea and the rest of the world by storm, so you do deserve this special treatment.

And there are more benefits. For example, being very popular with the female idols. Especially the ones your age. They all have busy schedules themselves, so there is no time for boyfriends. You are happy to help out though. Between schedules, you enjoy the company of Korea's most beautiful idols. You remember Wonyoung from three weeks ago. She is insanely pretty and the sex was great. The only downside is your own busy schedule. Not enough time to actually become proper fuck buddies with one if the girls, your schedules mostly conflicting.

But not on a day like this. The company got a great deal with a clothing brand. A big deal. And that's why a lot of idols are here, at this photoshoot location.

Just like you and Ningning.

"Right there, please!"

She cries out again as you hold her by her waist, her upper body resting atop the makeup table.

"And now turn right, please!"

You do as you are told, barely hearing the director's voice over the shutters of the cameras.

Your group already finished it's photoshoot half an hour ago. Your individual shoot is coming to an end too. Not knowing who it is, you are still waiting for your partner for the next couple of photos.

Since your agency isn't the only one now signed with the brand, you are not completely surprised, when you see that the idol approaching you is from another company.

"Hello, sunbae."

You bow respectfully. Trying not not stare. Choi Sooyoung. From SNSD. You can't believe your luck. Your favorite girl group. And Sooyoung herself. In that dress. You have to stop yourself, before you start drooling.

"Hello. (Y/n) is it, right?"

"Yeah."

You smile back at her, honored that she knows your name. The two of you haven't met before.

"I've heard a lot about you."

Her smile is genuine, but you could swear, her eyes are trying to tell you something. Like a secret. A secret only the two of you know.

"I'm honored."

You bow again, before turning towards the camera again. Wanting to hide your nervousness, you try to be professional.

The two of you just stand next to each other for a couple of shots at the beginning. Sooyoung, in that gorgeous, pink, shoulder less dress and golden heels and you, black suit, black vest, and a burgundy tie, which matches the red watch on your wrist.

Eventually, you find yourself holding onto her waist, while Sooyoung's hand rest on your right shoulder. It's only show of course. Trying to be respectful, you don't actually touch her, your hand just above the pink fabric.

She takes a couple of shots alone with the chair, your leader sat on during your group's shots. Afterwards, you take your place on that chair, while Sooyoung lifts her leg. You are captivated by its length and smoothness for a moment, until you feel her heel, slightly digging into your thigh.

A couple of camera shutters later, Sooyoung places her hand on her knee, bending forward. You are very aware of the fact that, with one look in the right direction, you would be seeing something that would keep you up all night. Instead, you stay focused on the camera.

"Now, (y/n)! Please place your hand on Sooyoung's thigh! Sooyoung, put your hand on his head!"

She does what she is told, immediately. You hesitate for a moment.

"You can touch me."

You look at her face for the first time in a while. Then you nod, wrapping your hand around her warm thigh.

"You are cute when you are being respectful."

You bite your lip, hoping the heat in your cheeks won't show in the photos later on.

"Just like that!"

The two of you look into the camera, until Sooyoung drops her first bomb on you.

"Don't look into the camera. Look straight ahead."

"What?"

In her position, she is almost pushing her chest into your face and now she asking you to look?

"Trust me. It's gonna come out great. Plus, you can see it as a reward. For making me look so good next to you in those pictures."

You gulp, debating internally, if you want to put your career on the line or not. But the temptation quickly proves to be too much. You only glance at her cleavage once, her smooth skin tempting you to lean in closer. You eventually do turn your head.

But instead of staying in place, Sooyoung suddenly changes position. Her lower body stands still. She removes her hand from your head and places her elbow on her naked knee, her chin now resting on her bend pointer finger and middle finger, as if she is thinking about something. You could still look at her cleavage if you wanted to, but now, Sooyoung's eyes are on the same level as yours.

And you can't escape her gaze. The camera crew gives you two applause and complements for your amazing chemistry, but you barely hear them. Sooyoung stares into your eyes, into your body, into your soul. You don't even dare to breathe, yet alone bluntly stare at her chest.

"Bad boy. Did you just try to look at your noona's tits?"

Your head starts spinning as if you have been dancing for ten hours straight. What is going on? You do, what you do best in these kind of situations, when you don't know what to do. Try to be funny.

"I didn't know I already have noona privileges."

You do make her chuckle as you point out her slip up. She just indirectly offered you a less formal way of talking with her.

The unwavering, sexy look she had put on, turns into a loving smile.

"From what I hear, you already have your fair share of privileges."

Her teasing and her overall sexy look makes it difficult for you to not become hard in public. A taks that proofs to be very difficult to pull off.

For everyone outside your little bubble, it must look like the two of you changed your concept from seductive strangers, to loving couple.

Unbeknownst to them, Sooyoung keeps talking in that voice of hers, sweet honey seems to be dripping from her lips.

"Do you enjoy your privileges so far?"

You are not slow, when it comes to thinking. And you desperately hope that your guess is correct. That Sooyoung isn't talking about actual privileges anymore.

"I-I do."

You can't help but let a shaky breath escape your lips. This is too good to be true.

"Oh, really?"

Sooyoung seems genuinely surprised.

"You don't care for noona privileges, then?"

She almost sounds hurt.

Like a well oiled machine, Sooyoung changes her position again, without even waiting for directions. A true model to outsiders. A skilful seductress to you.

She spins around and sits down on your right thigh. Instinctively, you reach for her waist, but hesitate, not knowing if you should touch her or not.

"Since you're my hoobae, I expect you to do as I say, from now on."

She suddenly sounds cold. And since you can't see her face anymore, you're afraid that you just blew your one and only chance of getting intimate with Choi Sooyoung.

But your worries of missing out are quickly replaced by new ones as she takes your hand and places it on top of her dress. But not around her waist, where you first intended to put it. Your palm rests on the hem of her pink one piece, your fingertips touching her upper thigh, which is draped over her left one. You are aware that only that piece of fabric and a couple of centimeters separate you from her core.

Eventually, your personal torture ends. The crew thanks the two of you for your hard work, promising you that your pictures will captivate the world, thanks to your chemistry.

You find it a little over the top, but you don't have the energy, or will, to argue.

"Come."

Sooyoung tells you, after saying goodbye to the staff. You walk after her, heading towards your changing room. But you never make it there. In the middle of the small hallway, Sooyoung turns around. Her arms now crossed in front of her body, she looks you up and down.

"Did you have fun with Ningning, earlier?'

You are stunned and visibly embarrassed.

"Well, I did hear her having fun, but I'm wondering about you. How often did she make you cum?"

"S-Sunbae... I-"

"Oh please. Don't play innocent. I heard about you more than I should've."

"Y-You did?"

You thought she was referring to your group's music, when she first said that an hour ago.

"Yes. I can even tell you their names, if you don't believe me. You seem to be leaving behind quite the impression."

"N-No I-I'm good, thanks."

Sooyoung ignores you with ease.

"Huh Yunjin, Shin Yuna,..."

You close your eyes in embarrassment, while she keeps counting with her fingers.

"...Baek Jiheon, Jang Wonyoung, Ningning..."

Sooyoung's eyes move from her fingers to you.

"You are going through these girls, like they go through their shoes, playboy."

"I-It's not like that."

What kind of stupid defense is that?

"Oh really? All these young girls seem to fall so easily for your tricks, is it that?"

"Sunbae, please..."

Sooyoung chuckles.

"Have you even been with a proper woman before?"

You get what she means. Someone older than yourself. You shake your head.

Sooyoung shakes her head in disappointment.

"Those girls are inexperienced themselves. How could they take care of my hoobae properly?"

She takes a step closer, slightly tilting her head as if she is trying to figure out what you could be possibly seeing in those girls.

"You've been fucking all these cute girls acting like grown women. So why don't I show you what a real woman can do with that big cock of yours?"

A wave of pleasure and anticipation rushes down your spine. For a brief moment, you wonder why Sooyoung would call you big, specifically. But you see her glancing down, biting her lip. You do the same, realizing that you have a hard on. You don't know for how long already.

Without waiting for an answer, Sooyoung reaches forward, cupping your cock over your pants

"I like the feeling of that. Maybe it's not only tricks you have going for you."

She gives you a quick peck on the lips, a cheeky smile playing around hers.

"I want a proper taste of you. All these rumors I hear sound way too exaggerated."

"Wait, sunbae. I-"

"Shush."

Sooyoung glares at you. Instead of her lips, her finger is now sealing your lips.

"You thought you were sleeping with all the female idols, right?"

You give her a weak nod.

"You are so naive. I'm gonna show you the real side of this industry."

You expect another kiss, when Sooyoung leans towards you. Instead, your lips only graze hers as she makes you miss, heading straight for your ear.

"Let me give you some senior advice, hoobae."

She nibbles on your earlobe for a second, before she continues to whisper into your ear.

"When someone offers you noona privileges, you take them."

Sooyoung takes your face into her hands, now looking at you again.

"Because real women like me, know what a boy like you wants."

She leans forward once again. Your lips barely touching hers as she keeps talking.

"We have what you need."

A moan almost escapes your lips.

Sooyoung pulls away, giving you a victorious smile.

"Follow me."

You do as she says and soon find yourself inside a spacious kitchen. Way bigger than your dressing room. Probably for the staff, if they have to work here the whole day.

"Isn't this kinda public?"

Sooyoung rolls her eyes. In that moment, you promise yourself not to say anything stupid ever again. She almost looked terrifying.

"Lesson one, playboy."

She placed her hands on the counter, slightly leaning over it. It takes an incredible amount of self control to not glance at her cleavage.

"Learn how to take a blowjob."

"What?"

You are mentally not quite there yet. You are still trying to figure out, how you went from a simple photoshoot to this.

"What do you-"

Sooyoung cuts you off with a gesture, motioning for you to come closer. Following her order, you find yourself trapped between the older woman and the countertop behind you.

"You are asking, what do I mean?"

You swallow your reply.

"I mean, that you have to learn how it feels like to receive proper head. We don't want you to cum too quickly."

Sooyoung leans in. Instead of kissing you, she tilts her head, kissing your neck.

"You see..."

Her words are interrupted by another kiss.

"Your noonas know how to worship cock. We know how important your pleasure is."

Sooyoung now moves towards your lips, leaving a trail of kisses behind.

"Now, try to hold on."

She whispers against your lips, before giving you a quick but deep kiss that leaves you breathless.

You watch in amazement as Sooyoung lets her finger wander from your cheek to your chin, along your throat, past your chest, until she reaches the hem of your shirt. At the same time, she lowers herself further and further, until she is squatting in front of you.

With a lustful look in her eyes, Sooyoung holds your stare as she opens your pants, without having to look at them. They glide down your legs and a moment later, you feel her give your clothed cock a kiss.

"Not half bad for a boy."

Sooyoung licks her lips, before she slowly pulls down your underwear.

"Hmmm."

Her warm breath plays around your cock as she hums in satisfaction.

"Girls your age don't know how to appreciate a dick like this."

Sooyoung closes her eyes, savouring the first taste of your cock as she lets her tongue glide over your tip. She follows that up with a couple of quick kisses along your shaft, before placing her tongue at your base. Your breath hitches as she drags her tongue along the underside of your cock.

"You really are blessed. It tastes amazing."

Sooyoung purrs, before finally opening her mouth wider. You bite your lip, watching how she slowly moves forward, her mouth around your cock without touching it. Once she reaches the second half of your length, Sooyoung finally closes her mouth around your cock, her lips forming an airtight seal.

"Oh, god."

You groan out, your head rolling back.

She starts to let her lips glide along your shaft as she pulls back, her tongue pressing against it from underneath. Once she reaches your tip, her tongue swirls around it, before she starts to take you into her mouth again.

Sooyoung doesn't stop doing these motions. Back and forth. Her head moves back and forth. Her lips glide along your shaft, back and forth. Her tongue drags along the underside of your shaft, back and forth.

Your knuckles quickly turn white as you hold onto the countertop behind you. Sooyoung is doing this at a way slower pace than all of the girls you've been with so far. She visibly enjoys sucking you off. You can tell by how her eyes are closed. How a slight smile plays around her lips. How she slightly hums around your cock, whenever she is about to take you in again.

It becomes harder and harder for you to keep your composure. There is no way in hell you're gonna last much longer. You try to tell her that, but your words are suddenly stuck in your throat, when Sooyoung decides to up her game even more.

You are now forced to take heavy breaths as the woman in front of you takes more of your cock. She glides further down you length than before. And soon, you realize that you've hit the back of her throat.

"Oh, shit."

You can't help but groan as the muscles of her throat flex around you. The act makes her throat squeeze you even more than before. Sooyoung slowly retreats, this time only halfway, before she pushes forward again.

"S-Sunbae."

You groan again, wanting to tell her to stop. If this is only the appetizer and you actually have a chance of feeling her pussy around you, you don't want to blow this. No pun intended.

Sooyoung does eventually listen to your warnings, feeling your cock throbbing in her throat. She leans back, until your tip only rests on her parted lips. She lets it fall off. Now, only a string of saliva connects her lips with your cock.

"That was..."

You can't find the right words.

"Good?"

Sooyoung shoots you a mocking grin.

"Good."

You repeat after her as you try to hold onto the feeling you just experienced.

"Judging from your reaction, these girls don't know how to take a cock down their throats. "

You weakly shake your head, confirming her assumption.

"A shame."

She mumbles to herself, before wrapping her hand around your cock.

"Time for lesson two, then."

Sooyoung stands back up again, her face inches away from yours.

"Learn to be patient. Older women don't like quick and meaningless wild sex. They like to take their time."

She pushes you towards your left, signaling you to sit down on the chair that is standing in the corner. After having done so, you watch Sooyoung stepping in front of you, before leaning down, her hands rest on your knees.

"This is also the perfect time for you to recover. Don't rush into this. Let me take the lead and enjoy the show."

Sooyoung puts her heel onto your thigh again, just like during the photoshoot. Except this time, she puts her finger on the top if her foot and slowly starts to drag it upwards. You watch it move along her smooth skin. Once it reaches her knee, Sooyoung speaks again.

"Learn to appreciate a woman's body. How it looks, how it feels and how it responds to your touch."

She reaches down again to take your hand. Slowly your fingers move up her leg and past her knee. Her thigh feels incredible as you explore more of her body. You eventually reach the hem of her dress. Before you can even try to push further, Sooyoung swats your hand away. In a swift motion, as if she is dancing to an inaudible tune, she lifts her foot off your thigh and spins around.

Her back is now facing you. Sooyoung raises her hands and then, slowly, lets them travel down the sides of her body. At the same time, she sways her hips seductively, until her hands reach her waist. She slightly bends forward as they run over her ass.

You almost reach out to grab a handful of her cheeks. But Sooyoung now lowers herself and sits on your lap. Her ass slightly grinds against you. She reaches behind herself, finding the back of your head, before forcing you to lean it forward. Your lips land on her naked shoulder and you start to kiss her skin. Thanks to the angle, you finally have a clear view of her cleavage for the first time. No bra, you notice. The dress seems to be tight enough to keep her breasts in place by itself.

Sooyoung must've caught you staring somehow, because she now place another finger on her collarbone. Her pink nail glides over skin, eventually reaching the upper hem of her dress. She hooks her finger into it, slowly pulling it down.

Just enough to make you drool, without revealing everything.

Sooyoung seems to have enough of your kisses. She gets off your lap and turns around again. While maintaining eye contact, she hooks both her thumbs into her dress on either of her sides. Sooyoung starts to strip in front of you. When she is about to free her tits entirely, she leans forward and lets them fall out of her dress. You watch with a dry mouth, unable to say a word.

She wiggles her hips as she gets the rest of the dress off, until she is standing completely naked in front of you. Her pink dress a pile of cloth around her ankles. She steps out of it and towards you.

"Good boy."

She straddles your lap again. Your cock is now resting on her stomach at the hight of her belly button.

"Lesson three."

Sooyoung reaches down to slowly stroke your cock. Her other hand grazes your cheek, before she lets it rest on your shoulder.

"Be a good fuck toy for your noona. Trust me, I know how to ride you so well, that you pass out from the pleasure."

She gives you another kiss on the lips, before she lifts herself off your lap.

"And feel free to explore a real woman's body."

With that, Sooyoung aligns her pussy with your cock. She slowly sinks back down.

"Oh, god!"

You immediately groan.

"Fuck!"

Even Sooyoung lets out a loud moan.

"You feel way bigger than before."

She now places the other hand on your shoulder as well, only your tip resting inside of her right now. That changes, when Sooyoung slowly lowers herself further. Looking down, you watch more and more of your cock disappear inside of her.

"Were you even able to fit all of this into your cute little girls?"

Despite her mocking tone, you can tell that Sooyoung is struggling. She stops for a couple of seconds halfway down, before she eventually keeps going.

When she does reach your base, her eyes roll to the back of her head.

"Damn, I can feel your cock push my organs out of the way."

Before you are able to reply, Sooyoung starts to lift herself off of you again. When only your tip remains inside her core, she lowers herself back onto you.

You grit your teeth at the pleasure and you remember what Sooyoung told you earlier. Your hands start from her hips. They move across her midriff and sides, until they reach her tits. You begin to grope them, while Sooyoung keeps her slow pace. Maybe you are a little too much to handle. Even for her.

Her soft skin underneath your palms and her tight pussy around your cock send spikes of pleasure through your system. When Sooyoung finally does get used to your size, she starts to ride you, just like she promised.

Her pace increases with every other thrust. A minute or so later, she is bouncing on your cock, a satisfied smile on her face. You lean forward to catch one of her nipples with your mouth, which makes her moan.

Sucking on her tits, you enjoy the ride Sooyoung is giving you. Once in a while, she changes it up a little. Instead of constantly impaling herself on your cock, she occasionally stays glued to your hips. She would then move hers in a circle motion, making your dick rub against all kind of places inside of her.

Sooyoung alternates between both styles of riding, making sure you are on a steady way towards your orgasm. But you manage to catch her off guard with how well you suck on her tits. Sooyoung moans more and more, never having expected you to be this good. She doesn't lose her rhythm, but it's obvious she is beginning to struggle to keep it together.

"Yes, keep sucking on them! Good boy!"

She praises you, while her hips smash down onto yours. You can't tell how long it as been, but Sooyoung's prediction might actually become true. Her pussy keeps draining your composure out of you. Whenever she circles her hips, your legs quiver. Your hands have found their way back to her waist by now. You are squeezing her sides, trying to not lose grip on reality.

Sooyoung is in no better condition. Your cock keeps hitting just the right spots. Whenever she impales herself on your cock, she can feel it push upwards against her guts, forcing the air out of her lungs. Eventually, she can't take it anymore. Only able to grind herself on top of you, back and forth, she becomes a mess in your lap, while you keep sucking on her breasts.

"Ah, fuck! (Y/n)!"

She didn't call you by a nickname for the first time in quite a while. Her pussy pulsates around you, trying to make you orgasm too. Her nails dig into your shoulders, probably leaving stinging marks behind. Sooyoung shivers and shakes on top of you.

Once she finally does come down, she gives you a lustful stare.

"Not bad, playboy."

She captures your lips with hers. You instinctively wait for her to announce another lesson.

"Last lesson."

There it is.

"Learning how to cream pie your sunbaes."

"Cream pie?"

"You heard me the first time."

Sooyoung bites her lip and resumes her riding.

You've never done this before, for obvious reasons. Your career, the other idol's career and so on and so on. But now, she isn't really giving you much of a choice. And it's not like you're complaining. Every fan would dream of having a chance to cream pie Choi Sooyoung.

That dream becomes reality a couple of minutes later.

"Oh, god! Sunbae!"

Now it's your turn to shout out her name. Well, at least the formal version of it. Your heels dig into the floor, you thrust upwards into her waiting pussy. And then, you start to fill her up.

A deep moan rolls off Sooyoung's tongue as she feels herself getting cream pied by someone way younger than herself. Your warmth enters her stomach and she makes sure that nothing of your precious cum escapes, by not moving at all.

"You did a great job, playboy. You are a fast learner."

After her praise, Sooyoung gives you a curious look.

"How many more rounds do you have in you? I won't be leaving this place, until I've made sure that you are taken care of properly."

She leans down to kiss you again, her tongue dancing with yours for a while.

"And there is one more thing older women do, that younger girls don't."

After breaking the kiss, Sooyoung whispers into your ear again.

"Swallow."

[headspace-hotel]

Chemically sterilized...or mechanically sterilized?

It is clear that applying chemicals to your yard and landscape, be it fertilizers, weed killers, or pesticides, has devastating effects to the community of life that is present in every place.

But is the terrifying decline in insects explainable by chemicals alone?

When i am in mowed environments, even those that I know have no lawn chemicals, they are almost entirely empty of life. There are a few bees and other insects on the dandelions, but not many, and the only birds I see are American robins, Grackles, and European starlings.

Even without any weed killers at all, regular mowing of a lawn type area eliminates all but a few specially adapted weeds.

The plants of a lawn where I live include: Mouse ear chickweed, Birds-eye Speedwell, Common blue violet, Dandelion, Wild Garlic, Creeping charlie, White Clover, Black Medick, Broad-leaved plantain, Mock Strawberry, Crabgrass, Small-flowered Buttercup, Ribwort Plantain, Daisy Fleabane, a few common sedges, Red Deadnettle...That sounds like a lot of plants, but the problem is, almost all of them are non-native species (Only Violets, Daisy Fleabane, and the sedges are native!) and it's. The Same. Species. Everywhere. In. Every. Place.

How come...? Because mowed turf is a really specific environment that is really specifically beneficial to a number of almost entirely European plants, and presents stressors that most plants (including almost all native north american plants) simply can't cope with.

The plants mentioned above are just the flowering weeds. The grasses themselves, the dominant component of the lawn, are essentially 100% invasive in North America, many of them virulently and destructively invasive.

Can you believe that Kentucky bluegrass isn't even native to Kentucky? Nope, it's European! The rich pasture of the Bluegrass region of Kentucky was predominantly a mix of clover, other legumes, and bamboo. The clovers—Kentucky clover, Running buffalo clover, and buffalo clover—are highly endangered now (hell, kentucky clover wasn't even DISCOVERED until 2013) and the bamboo—Giant rivercane, Arundinaria gigantea—has declined in its extent by 98%. Do European white and red clovers fulfill the niches that native clovers once did? Dunno, probably not entirely.

One of the biggest troubles with "going native" is that North America legitimately does not have native grass species that really fill the niche of lawn. Most small, underfoot grassy plants are sedges and they are made for shady environments, and they form tufts and fancy sprays, not creeping turf. Then there's prairie grasses which are 10 feet tall.

What this means, though, is that lawns don't even remotely resemble environments that our insects and birds evolved for. Forget invasive species, lawns are an invasive BIOME.

It's a terrible thing, then, that this is just what we do to whatever random land we don't cover in concrete: back yards, road margins, land outside of churches and businesses, spaces at the edges of fields, verges at bypasses and gas stations...

Mowing, in the north american biomes, selects for invasive species and promotes them while eliminating native species. There's no nice way to put it. The species that thrive under this treatment are invasive.

And unfortunately mowing is basically the only well-known and popular tool even for managing meadow and prairie type "natural" environments. If you want to prevent it from succeeding to forest, just mow it every couple of years.

This has awful results, because invasive species like Festuca arundinacea (a plant invented by actual Satan) love it and are promoted, and the native species are harmed.

Festuca arundinacea, aka Tall Fescue, btw is the main grass that you'll find in cheap seed mixes in Kentucky, but it's a horrific invasive species that chokes everything and keeps killing my native meadow plants. It has leaves like razor blades (it's cut me so deeply that it scarred) and has an endosymbiont in it that makes horses that eat it miscarry their foals.

And this stuff is ALL OVER the "prairie" areas where I work, like it's the most dominant plant by far, because it thrives on being mowed while the poor milkweeds, Rattlesnake Master and big bluestems slowly decline and suffer.

It's wild how hard it is to explain that mowing is a very specific type of stressor that many plants will respond very very negatively to. North American plants did not evolve under pressures that involved being squished, crushed, snipped to 8 inches tall uniformly and covered in a suffocating blanket of shredded plant matter. That is actually extremely bad for many of the prairie plants that are vital keystone species. Furthermore it does not control invasive species but rather promotes them.

Native insects need native plant cover. Many of them co-evolved intimately with particular host plants. Many others evolved to eat those guys. And Lord don't get me started on leaf removal, AKA the greatest folly of all humankind.

So wherever there is a mowed environment, regardless of the use of chemicals or not, the bugs don't have the structural or physical habitat characteristics they evolved for and they don't have the plant species they evolved to be dependent on.

Now let's think about three-dimensional space.

This post was inspired when I saw several red winged blackbirds in the unmowed part of a field perching on old stems of Ironweed and goldenrod. The red-winged blackbirds congregated in the unmowed part of the field, but the mowed part was empty. The space in a habitat is not just the area of the land viewed from above as though on a map. Imagine a forest, think of all the squirrels and birds nesting and sitting on branches and mosses and lichens covering the trunks and logs. The trees extend the habitat space into 3 dimensions.

Any type of plant cover is the same. A meadow where the plants grow to 3 feet tall, compared with a lawn of 6 inches tall, not only increases the quality of the habitat, it really multiplies the total available space in the habitat, because there is such a great area of stems and leaves for bugs and birds to be on. A little dandelion might form a cute little corner store for bugs, A six foot tall goldenrod? That's a bug skyscraper! It fits way more bugs.

It's not just the plants themselves, it's the fallen leaves that get trapped underneath them—tall meadow plants seem to gather and hoard fallen leaves underneath. More tall plants is also more total biomass, which is the foundation of the whole food chain!

Now consider light and shade. Even a meadow of 3ft tall plants actually shades the ground. Mosses grow enthusiastically even forming thick mats where none at all could grow in the mowed portions. And consider also amphibians. They are very sensitive to UV light, so even a frog that lives in what you see as a more "open" environment, can be protected by some tall flowers and rushes but unable to survive in mowed back yard

[agnesafterhours]

lavender haze | lee know. smut.

Your boyfriend is not prone to communicating his feelings through words, but luckily for him, you always know exactly what he needs. (1.9k words)

CONTENT: smut, boyfriend!lino, creampie, unprotected sex and cum eating. minors and empty blogs do not interact.

© all rights reserved. i do not allow reposting and/or translations of my work.

Contrary to popular belief, Minho sulks often. You do understand why people would believe that isn’t the case—your boyfriend’s dry jokes followed by a sarcastic smile being one of the reasons why you were drawn to him in the first place. When you first met him a couple years back, when he was still doing busking events with his dance crew alongside a common friend of yours, you’d watch in doe-eyed adoration as he’d flash his bunny teeth in a playful grin to his crewmates each time they got one move slightly wrong. What pissed them off the most is they could never get back at Minho—he never forgot any moves, never missed a beat. His justifiable confidence made him oh so irritating—you were attracted like moth to a flame to his character, his knife-sharp features matching his equally piercing sense of humour were fuel to the fire. 

But the thing about your boyfriend's sulking is that it is often unjustifiable. Of course he doesn't need a reason to want to be pampered by you, but it'd be nice if Minho admitted he also likes to be taken care of at least once in a while.  

“What did I do to deserve this torture?” The ever so intimidating choreographer mumbles from his spot on your bed, your pastel pink pillowcases being a little counterproductive to the assertive tone he's been trying to use on you. 

Minho can’t suppress the smirk forming on his lips at your scoff, “Torture? I'm just asking you to wait! These bedsheets got here like, two weeks ago!” You're on your feet, struggling to fold one of the new huge linens to store in your closet. “If they stay in these bags any longer they're gonna start smelling weird.” 

“You know that's not how it works, right?” 

“I don't care. You know you should be helping me, right?” You look back, a smirk of your own automatically taking place when your eyes find his. 

Despite the lopsided smile that seems to be permanently plastered on his face, Minho grunts as he drags his body out of the comforter and towards you, “You know you should wash these before putting them away, right?”  

And as soon as your eyebrows raise and he sees the very familiar smile on your lips as you push the sheet into his arms, your boyfriend realizes he fell right into your trap, “Have it your way, then!” 

The man watches as you jump in bed, getting comfortable on the spot he previously was—eyes filled with the similar overwhelming fondness they usually hold when Minho looks at you. “You’re annoying.” He takes off the rest of the sheeting from it’s flimsy plastic bags, making his way to the laundry room. “Don’t fall asleep!” He exclaims from the hallway. 

“I’m not making any promises!” 

“Don’t sleep! I wanna spend time with you!” Unfortunately, no amount of stubbornness can take away Minho's super power of having you giggling into your pillow. He wants to spend time with you. He's the love of your life and he wants to spend time with you.  

Those are the feelings you can't quite understand. You’ve been with Minho for so long—at least long enough you've been through the “honeymoon stage” everyone seems to fear the ending of. For you, it feels like this stage never seems to be over. You pray it never ends.  

So here you are, kicking your feet because your long term boyfriend said he wants to spend time with you. At least you know he's as obsessive as you are, if not slightly more. 

Minho's way of showering you with love was overwhelming. He isn't the type to communicate his feelings through words, instead, he'd do things like casually tell you about getting into a rather serious argument with his manager, trying to get the day off so he’d spend your birthday with you. Of course he would be busy, cooking your favourite meal as he casually narrates the dramatics him and his group went through trying to get his needs respected. He doesn't look you in the eye when he says he got emotional, the only reason why his manager gave in being Minho “never behaved like this before”. This is his way of saying you're his utmost priority, can't you tell? The redness of his ears and fidgety eyes are a big hint of the nervousness Minho prayed you wouldn't pick up on. Unfortunately for him, you know him like the back of your hand.  

You know that a quick glance your way means someone said something he found amusing in a way. If his hand fell to your lower back in social gatherings, it means Minho is a bit nervous and needs some grounding. If he's too silent, you know to sit beside him and wait until it all comes pouring out. With you, it always does. If he's vocalizing how tired he is, you know he'd enjoy talking for hours on end about anything that comes to his mind. Minho always needs you, he just has very specific patterns to show you exactly what he's currently craving from you. Fortunately for him, he's your favourite subject matter. He's the only thing you ever want to pay attention to—the sole owner of your entire focus.  

That's why you know exactly what he needs when he flops back on the bed, and after a few moments of silence, blurts out “I miss you. I missed you a lot this week." 

You crawl out of your nest and straddle your boyfriend's lap, dragging your comforter along and covering you both with it.  

You're both silent as you hold his cheeks, taking your time as you kiss them, then his forehead, and the mole on his nose—at least a couple times each. Minho's hand slides down your lower back when your lips find his, tongue slowly tasting his as you feel his heart beating tranquilly against the palm of your hand sliding up and down his chest. You feel his right hand gently cupping the back of your neck, holding you close against him as the other sneaked under your shirt, slowly caressing your bare back.  

Minho doesn't try to take control of the kiss like he usually does—neither do you. Your bodies seem to move in harmony, the glacial movements of his tongue making you sigh against his mouth every now and again, promptly resulting in a smirk of his. You loved kissing his smile. 

“Missed you so much, baby.” He repeated softly against your lips. Minho now had both hands under your shirt, his touch leaving goosebumps as he caressed up and down your sides.  

“Missed you too. Always miss you so much, Min.” Your breathing is a bit compromised now, hands moving on their own as you remove your own shirt.  

Minho quickly follows, his palms back on your hips as soon as his shirt is tossed to the side. “I know you do, pretty. I know.” 

His hands lay on your ass, groping as he whispers against your lips. “Spent the entire week thinking about fucking you. Gonna lay on your side for me, pretty? Hm? Gonna do it just how I like it?” 

Too much, too much, too much. You don't think you're really moaning anymore, but you're sure your mouth's been hanging open for a while. Minho’s hips are slow as he hits the deepest parts of you, holding your squirming body for a few seconds each time he bottoms out. The sweet, lazy drag of his cock inside you make your lust disable all of your senses. He felt heavy, thick, so deep inside you. Full. You felt so, so full.  

Somewhere in the haze you feel his palms making their way towards your chest, you process a bit of squirming as he squeezes them, massaging your breasts as he continued his torturously slow assault on your g-spot. 

Minho can feel every cell fighting against his urge to mount and pump into you as fast as he pleases, but he'd endure anything if it means he gets to hear your drawn out whines as he rocks his hips back and forth, your entire body shivering every time he pauses deep inside of you for a few moments.

He runs his hand through the goosebumps of your arms and back to your chest again. After feeling you up a bit more, your boyfriend takes your hand and drags it south as he presses on your lower stomach, making you feel him moving inside you. 

“You're feeling how good I fill you up, honey? Can you feel it?” His breathing is much more ragged now, Minho's body is visibly shuddering behind you as well. You squeeze around and him, bringing his hips to a stop. 

You look back, staring at his open mouth as you inhale each other's heavy breaths. As if snapped out of a trance, Minho kisses you roughly. He swallows each of your moans when his hips start swaying back and forth again, still as slow and rough as he was.  

His hand leaves yours as he reaches for your chin, spit dribbling down your lips. 

“So fucked out you're drooling for me. God, you're so good, baby. You take it so good.” 

“Holy shit, Minho! So close, so close, so close-” Your voice is no longer a whisper as it's pitch gets higher, your orgasm dangling in front of you in a fever dream. You feel him everywhere and it's almost too much, but certainly not enough. You're so overstimulated you don't know what to focus on to reach your high—both your senses and judgment so clouded you can't muster the brainpower to figure out what you need. 

Luckily for you, Minho knows you like the back of his hand. “I love you. Love you so much.” 

You can't tell how long it lasts, you're barely able to process Minho coming inside you. You feel the ghost of his hands holding your hips still as he whimpers in your ear—the sound alone making you shiver all over again. Your body shakes in his hold, limbs giving out after a prolonged orgasm you're not used to experiencing.  

“Love you too… Love you so much…” The words mindlessly escape your lips as your head slowly sways, fingers twirling the ends of your splayed out hair. 

Your eyes are closed as he lays you on your back, adjusting the pillow under your head as he chuckles. “Love you too, pretty. Hang in there just a second.” 

You feel his hands caressing your body as he handles you, a sixth sense making you chuckle when you realize he spread your legs but didn't start cleaning you up. 

His hands run down your thighs, you can hear the smirk on his voice. “What's up?” 

“Stop staring.” You say, humming with your eyes still closed. 

“Don't wanna.” You feel his fingers sliding through your core. “Mouth wide open for me, baby. Come on.” 

You sigh when you get a taste of his coated fingers, lips wrapping around as your tongue licks in between them. You open your eyes to find him hovering above you, eyes fix in your mouth. 

The look you give Minho makes him dizzy—the way you stare up at him with your big doe eyes in such adoration while sucking cum off his fingers almost made his heart burst. He can feel how each beat of it belongs to you, his heartbeat chained to a rhythm that followed your own.  

Chest to chest, Minho watches as your eyes sparkle, your hand softly stroking the back of his head. A smile forms on your lips when you pop his fingers out of your mouth as you breathily mutter against them. “You know I'm gonna marry you someday, right?” 

[httpsserene]

𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 - 𝐥𝐬. 𝟏𝟖 | 𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝟒𝟎𝟒: 𝐏𝐍𝐅 |

𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝟒𝟎𝟒: 𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 - 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐞

summary: after all of the trials, tribulations, and failed relationships of your life, you deserve your happy ending. content warning: soft launch and hard launch. sibling dynamics (bullying). reader's mom. puns. happily ever after. elden-ring dlc spoilers! (ik it came out very recently but we’re pretending it’s older in this universe). profanity. a couple suggestive lines. attempt at humor. alcohol (reader gets drunk on nye). pairing: lance stroll x fem!black!reader

from serene: the insane amount of work i did to make fake clips of a twitch stream…there’s most definitely an easier way to do it. unrelated: i did not think a lewham win was in the cards this year, but i'm so fucking happy that he did win silverstone! of any race, i'm glad it was that one. finishing up toasty part two today, so expect it to drop tomorrow or the day after that! and most importantly, enjoy this final installment of error 404: plot not found xxx

⌕ prev | join taglist | requests & feedback | table of contents | series toc ↻

twitter • ynplays • december 27th

instagram • ynfanaccount • december 27th

liked by lancestroll, user35, user12, and 11,376 others

ynfanaccount: the three most popular clips from yn's twitch stream today! can you see a theme?

tagged ynplays

view comments

user1: lance liked this!!!

➥ user2: do you think he watched the stream :(

➥ user3: girl. i think he watched IRL. that was definitely a man's voice in the third clip! you can kinda hear him at the very start!

user4: don't know what's worse: yn lying to us about having a date for nye or yn gaslighting us into believing that was her sister smh

➥ yoursister: i'm not even at her house rn 🤔

➥ ynplays: whaTCHU OUT HERE BEING MESSY FOR??!

➥ user4: exposed by your own sister

➥ user5: L + ratio

➥ user6: ynnnnnnn who was thatttttttt

user7: so we can all agree that she was talking to lance in that last clip :o

➥ user8: um no. he's still in canada. yn seems like the type to have already moved on to a different man 🙄🥱

➥ user9: who the fuck are you? you must be new around here if you're deciding to talk crazy.

➥ user10: and how TF do you know that lance is still in canada? r u stalking him or smth? last clip, turn up your volume, clear as day you can hear yn almost say his name

➥ user11: worst take i've heard so far @/user8 delete your account 🤡🤡🤡

igstory • ynplays uploaded!

[caption1; when he gifts you flowers just because >>>>] [caption2; wild baby sega posing pretty in the snow 🥺]

yourbestie: answer my fucking facetime neOWW YOU WHORE

yourfriend1: "he" as in lance stroll, the f1 driver that flew all the way from canada to see you and prove that a long distance relationship with him is worth it and he also begged for you to cuddle him live on your twitch stream, gifted you flowers just because? ynplays: he *allegedly begged for me to cuddle him. you couldn't really hear it on the stream 🤓☝🏽 youfriend1: OMG ITS ACTUALLY HM INN YOUR HOUSE U LYING SNAKE yourfriend1: oh your sister is going to kill you rip 😔

yourfriend2: oh wow lance...i didn't expect him to be a returning love interest at all (sarcasm) yourfriend2: put my niece on the phone 🥱 ynplays: sega is not your niece ynfriend2: PUT MY FUR-NIECE ON THE PHONE BEFORE I STEAL HER 👺

yoursister: omw. ynplays: m not opening the door yoursister: okay? lance will open it for me ynplays: not if he doesn't want me to die he won't ynsister: if he wants to live, he will. also you gave me a key ✨

lilymhe: can't wait to see you in the paddock next year 😘 ynplays: wtf. you know who i am😨 lilymhe: alex gossips VERY loudly with george liymhe: also i love the unedited skincare & makeup videos you make, they feel like girlhood honestly ynplays: going to faint rq brb

instagram • lancestroll • dec28th • where i'm supposed to be ⚑

liked by estebanocon, chloestroll, ynbestie, and 675,432 others

lancestroll: reconnecting

view comments

estebanocon: seems better 😁

➥ lancestroll: yes you were right okay thank you

➥ user12: right about what?

➥ user13: think it's a refrence to esteban's reply on lance's previous post!

fernandoalonso: that pizza looks mid.

➥ lancestroll: what

➥ user14: IJBOL 😂😂😂

➥ user15: it feels like i just heard my parents using slang

➥ user16: that's my favorite rookie 🙂‍↕️

user17: okay yn's best friend liked!

➥ user18: soft launch radar: SCREAMING 🔊🎚️

➥ user19: does this count as a sl? it's more like a deluxe edition to an album

➥ user20: it's giving album repackaging

➥ user18: i think it's cute that he's still doing a sl !! i'm just happy they're getting back together 😌

user21: LANCE the bouquet you gifted her was sooo pretty!

➥ user22: my boyfriend has to step the fuck up (the location on this too 😭😭😭)

➥ user23: bro there's no conformation he even gave her those 😒

➥ user24: are you blind 🤨? you need to get your eyes checked fr @/user23

➥ user21: ain't it funny? how the non-believers have fallen so low into their delusion...

twitter • december 28th

instagram • ynplays • dec 30th • happy ⚑

liked by estebanocon, lilymhe, yoursister, and 179,674 others

ynplays: yes, i have a date for my new year's party: it's the 31st! 🥳🥳🥳

view comments

alexandrasaintmleux: i can treat you better than him 😩

➥ lilymhe: she's mine 😡

➥ ynplays: but pookies :( don't fight

➥ alexandrasaintmleux: okay kitten whiskers :(

➥ lilymhe: hmph. as long as you don't forget that you were daddy's first 😤

➥ user25: if i didn't know the shrek reference i'd be calling the cops

yoursister: you will send that poor man to an early grave

➥ yoursister: at least you're raising his blood pressure and not mine

➥ yourbestie: i'm just happy i'm not getting the video game rage texts anymore

➥ ynplays: haters (i love you both)

➥ yoursister: it takes the same amount of energy to love or or hate and i will always chose hate when it's you (i love you more)

➥ yourbestie: it's a consequence of cutting my hair off when we were three (ditch your man so we can have a sleepover please)

user26: lame ass dad joke in the caption

➥ ynplays: i thought it was funny 😕

➥ yourfriend1: it wasn't 👎🏽

➥ yourfriend2: should've asked the gc b4 you posted 🤷‍♀️

user27: so we all just ignoring her asking him for nudes…

➥ user28: and what about it???

➥ user29: you're just mad you don't have anybody to send you smth naughty

➥ user30: you notice how he didn't say no tho 👀👀

user31: nonchalant boyfriend core

➥ user32: nonchalant boyfriend & gamer girlfriend >>>

➥ user33: like, he just always in his own world, he rly quiet fr unless he know u

➥ user34: he funny asl tho if he know u type shit

user35: adding this to my lance stroll x reader fic

➥ user36: you couldn't WATERBOARD this info out of me 😭

➥ user37: lance stroll boyfriend aesthetic

➥ user38: ...aye dm a link to that fic LOL ☠️☠️☠️

igstory • ynplays uploaded!

[caption; ui i Lov myy bfrikenddd!!!?! happy new yrsss, ocme give me a KISS labbceyyyy]

lancestroll: i leave you with your sister for 2 seconds to use the bathroom lancestroll: you're super adorable when you're drunk lancestroll: i'll get you some water and come give you a kiss mon coeur lancestroll: you're so pretty

user39: something tells me you will not be able to stream tomorrow

user40: PUT THAT DOWN !!! ts is bigger than your HEAD GIRL

instagram • lancestroll and ynplays • january 1st • my heart ⚑

liked by lewishamilton, landonorris, twitch, astonmartinf1 and 3,492,125 others

lancestroll and ynplays: you guys haven't seen us together since last year 🤪😅

view comments

📌 lancestroll: yn's still passed out from last night but she wanted me to tell you guys that she will still be streaming tonight

➥ lancestroll: (you didn't hear this from me but she is definitely not going to be able to 🫥)

➥ user41: LMAO tell her to rest well

➥ user42: make sure she drinks lots and lots of water

➥ user43: thank u for the update messenger bf lance!!!

lewishamilton: happy it worked out for you man

➥ lancestroll: me too 😁

➥ user44: ik lewis mad as hell he didn't find yn before lance LMAOO 😭😭😭

twitch: now when are we seeing you two play overcooked on stream?

➥ lancestroll: she gets mad at me in animal crossing so i don't think it'll be in my best interests to play overcooked with her

➥ user45: yeah that game tears marriages apart

nhl: can't wait to see you guys rink side together - admin

➥ user46: nhl admin is one of us

yourfriend1: WHAT A HAPPY NEW YEAR 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

➥ yourbestie: glad to start the year knowing i will NEVER have to sit through another vacation fling ever again

➥ yoursister: well,,,what if i want to find love on vacay?

➥ yourfriend1: NO

➥ yourfriend2: UH UH

➥ yourbestie: H-H-HELL NAW ❌❌❌‼️‼️

user47: i love when soft launches only last for a few days

user48: i saw this and smiled like i had anything to do with them getting together

➥ user49: nodded my head like i know them personally 😌

instagram • ynplays • january 1st • where love grows ⚑

liked by lancestroll, nhl, estebanocon, lewishamilton and 2,582,991 others

ynplays: yeah yeah yeah stream is cancelled tn (my head is about to combust) to make up for it, canada vlog is premiering tonight 💁🏾‍♀️

tagged lancestroll, segagenesisthedawg

view comments

lancestroll: do i get vip on twitch yet?

➥ ynplays: i'll teach you how to mod too

➥ user50: modern day love story 👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻

➥ user51: discord mod and kitten ts

➥ ynplays: 🤢🤢🤮🤮

lilymhe: i got early access to this video, we are NOT the same xxx

➥ alexandrasaintmleux: i got it too, so we are the same x

➥ user52: damn they really tussling over yn???

➥ user53: can't blame them, i would do the same 💆🏾‍♀️

yourbestie: i feel like i should've gotten more screen time in this vid 🤔

➥ yourfriend1: speak on it bc when she wasn't with lance she was with us being annoying asl🥴

➥ yourfriend2: are we losing the friend group leader to a man? never thought she'd fall so far from grace...

➥ ynplays: friend group leader is CRAZY n y'all just happy to use me for clout huh 😤

yoursister: didn't realize we were returning to clickbait storytime yt era

➥ yoursister: sucks to see how unreletable you've become 😔

➥ ynplays: im going home and stealing ALL my clothes back

➥ yoursister: i misspoke, i apologize for my words *plays ukulele*

➥ user54: believe it or not this is love 🤓

yourmom: lance, thank you for giving my daughter the love and care she deserves x

➥ ynplays: mom this is my post???

➥ lancestroll: of course ma'am. i'll love her tirelessly

➥ ynplays: i'll love you endlessly baby 🥹

user55: HAPPY NEW YEAR YNNNNN

➥ ynplays: thank you my love! i wish you the best year everrrr

➥ user56: happy new year yn stans we up haters stay down

user57: i didn't think we'd get a vlog!!! ilysm ynnnn

➥ user58: best content creator out rn hand down

© httpsserene2024

[5ummit]

So there's this post with a troubling number of notes going around insisting that "dead dove" is not a genre, it doesn't inherently have anything to do with darkfic, and that the tag could be applied to fics that are "100% fluffy where everyone's having a good time" if they happen to contain some abnormal (though entirely non-problematic) content like an unusual kink. The claim is that "dead dove: do not eat" is simply a "courtesy tag" that means "this is a very specific niche, mind the tags." And that's just... wrong.

I wrote up a whole rebuttal to this post since I can't stand misinformation and frankly OP was being kinda rude and judgey on top of their wrongness. But right after I posted my reply, OP turned off reblogs because, and I quote, “some fuckwad added some dumb shit onto this post and it is no longer educational” (the “fuckwad” being me and the “dumb shit” being proof that they were wrong). A couple people have asked me to make a rebloggable version of my response, which I've decided to do because this isn't the first time I've heard similar claims and I want to help set the record straight. However, I'm not linking the original post on the off chance this gains traction because OP did the right thing by turning off reblogs, preventing it from circulating further, and I don't want them to get hate for being unfortunately misinformed.

For those who don't know the history, "dead dove: do not eat" was originally proposed as a catchall "hydra trash party" alternative label for any fandom to warn that the content of a fic may be considered problematic or potentially upsetting and to read the tags carefully so you know what you're getting into and won't complain later. Specifically, DD:DNE was intended to convey that the Bad Things in the fic would likely be reveled in and not explicitly condemned by the narrative, which some people tend to get up in arms about, hence the need for the extra warning in addition to the tags. Don't believe me? Here's the original proposal (note DD:DNE can be found on a handful of fics dated before 2015 but this is when it really took off and became a Thing).

There are currently around 50,000 fics tagged as "dead dove: do not eat" on AO3 and close to 50% of those also include the rape/noncon warning (which of course is not the only type of "dead dove" but is one of the most popular and most consistently tagged). The normal percentage of noncon fics in any given fandom? Around 1-3%. That's a HUGE disparity. So don't tell me that dead dove is just a general "courtesy tag" and doesn't or shouldn't have dark connotations. Even the context of the original joke on Arrested Development has a dark undertone. Micheal Bluth casually finds an animal carcass in a bag in his refrigerator with the label "do not eat", as if eating it would be any sane person's first thought. The whole situation is kinda fucked up. And this fucked up vibe very much carries over into fandom usage too, as was intended.

The claim that dead dove has nothing to do with the content's genre and could just as easily be used to describe a 100% fluffy fic in which everyone's having a good time is straight up Wrong, or at the very least, severely warping the original meaning. Also, when someone these days says that they like/dislike "dead dove" most people in fandom automatically understand what that means because of the consistency of its usage over the years and the way language evolves. Whether you like it or not, "dead dove" IS a genre now and the term does carry a specific connotation. I do agree that DD:DNE should definitely still be used in conjunction with other tags, when applicable, to be explicit about the exact type of fucked up content you may find, but to say that the term is meaningless on its own is patently false and I'm tired of people who don't know what they're talking about pushing this narrative and causing even more confusion.

You want a generic term that also means "mind the tags" and doesn't have any inherently dark connotations? Just use good ol' "what it says on the tin" instead of trying to force dead dove to be something it's not.

[iisasarcasticlittleshite]

MC being a Morally grey menace Part 1

It started on their second visit to the Devildom...

During that first year of the exchange program, Lucifer and Diavolo had gone out of their way to hide the more unsightly aspects of the Devildom. But the second time around, when the human just fell from the sky, they didn't exactly have the time to smooth things over.

And yet, MC hadn't batted an eye.

The first incident was when MC walked in on one of Lucifer and Diavolo's meetings, but they weren't alone.

The low-level demon's eyes lit up, and his expression went from pleading to maniacal. This human was everyone's soft spot, surely the prince and his Lord of Pride wouldn't sully themselves in front of their precious human!

"Sorry, did you two hear that Simeon-? Oi!" MC startled as the demon threw himself at their feet.

"Mercy, dear human! Surely you could find it in your heart to grant mercy to this poor, foolish demon!"

Lucifer stepped forward, but even he wasn't quite sure what he was going to do next, apart from yanking that demon away from his human. Diavolo braced to start explaining why this demon was in his office, clad in chains.

But MC, dear, human, MC who should have damn well had some questions about this impromptu torture session they just walked in on, didn't so much as bat an eye.

Lifting a foot, they took one step sideways out of the demon's reach and carried on talking.

"Simeon wanted to ask you two something, just text him when you're done with...this." They gestured vaguely to the crumpled demon on the floor.

"Please, you CAN'T leave me here!"

MC didn't so much as look at him, making their way back to the door. "Don't work too hard boys! And don't forget you're on dinner duty tonight, Lucifer."

"...Of course." Lucifer watched, wide-eyed, as the human calmly walked out the door. He wondered how much explaining he'd need to do later.

To his surprise, the subject was never brought up, and MC's behaviour was utterly unchanged.

Well...not entirely unchanged.

The following week, a couple of locations to one of the Devildom's most popular chains came up with reports of missing inventory and Grimm coming up short.

A robbery, they didn't know by whom.

That week, MC and Mammon had been joined at the hip, even more so than usual, so out of pure curiosity Satan cornered the human in the morning making breakfast.

"These robberies. You wouldn't happen to know anything about them, would you, dearest?"

MC shrugged. "Not a thing."

"Truly? Because a rather large sum of grim is now missing, and you've been spending an awful lot of time with Mammon lately."

MC looked up at Satan, and their eyes flashed golden, their grin almost inhuman. "Not like they'll miss it. They're a multi-million grim company that doesn't pay their employees enough to live."

Satan hardly believed his ears. "MC did you-?"

MC chuckled, and went right back to the eggs they were frying. "I don't know what you're talking about, love. Now help me carry these out."

Satan could have asked more questions, hell, he probably should have, but quite frankly, he's more impressed than anything else, and very much wants to know how they bypassed the security systems next time.

Part 2

[morlao]

Breaking your own

rules

▪︎Isaac Garcia x fem!reader

▪︎Y/N Howard, Jackie's younger sister

Things have always been tough for you. As the youngest Howard girl you were constantly compared to your older sisters Lucy and Jackie.

Lucy the popular sunshine that everybody loved and Jackie the perfect girl who already had her plans for the future figured out and worked very hard to reach them.

Don't get me wrong, you loved your sisters with all your heart but sometimes you wished that they - especially Jackie - wouldn't set the bar so high. You were always only "Jackie's sister". Even your teachers referred to you that way.

Since the accident it had gotten so much worse. While it was obvious that you were breaking apart, Jackie had much more self control. While she studied even harder, you could barely concentrate.

When you heard the message that you and Jackie had to move to Colorado to the Walter family, you couldn't deny that you felt relieved.

Starting a new life with the Walters also meant leaving this comparism behind. Or at least most of it. You could start over new. No teachers who acted like your way of grieving was wrong and no uncle who told you what your parents would have wanted you to be.

~ ~ ~

You immediately liked Katherine and George when you first saw them as they picked you up from the airport. They made you feel so welcome. One could only hope that the boys were just as nice as they were.

Well... they weren't. At least not all of them.

You hadn't even entered the house when you heard someone shout. "Watch out!" You could just jump out of the way when a boy with a skateboard zoomed by.

"That's Lee." George explained.

Right after him chased a little boy, almost bumping into Jackie.

"Be careful, Benny!", George shouted but you were pretty sure the boy didn't hear him - and if he did, then he didn't care.

George led you into the living room where two boys were sitting on the sofa playing video games.

"Boys, that are Jackie and Y/N Howard. Girls, that are Alex and Isaac."

The boys greeted you both with a smile. The way Alex looked at Jackie made you grin widely. Seemed like this could become interesting.

Meanwhile your attention was on Isaac and for a couple of seconds your eyes met. He looked very handsome with his dark hair and his laid-back look.

Isaac grinned and raised his eyebrow and quickly you looked away. You didn't want him to think that you fancied him. Because you didn't. You were not looking for a flirt or even a relationship. You just wanted to forget about the accident and start over new.

George smiled. "Okay, let's continue the tour." He showed you the kitchen, where you met Will, Nathan and Danny and the living room where Parker was playing Hockey.

Wow, you didn't expect so many of them. It would definitely take you some time to remember all the names.

At last he lead you in the garden to the pool and to a smaller boy with a camera. A blonde guy was just getting out of the water, grinning as he saw you and your sister. He put on a total show, acting like he was the best looking guy in the whole universe.

You hated guys like him. Way too self-centered and way too arrogant. Unfortunately you noticed the way Jackie looked at him. She tried to hide it but she was clearly faszinated by him.

"Come on, Cole! Don't be such a show-off!", Nathan said, rolling his eyes.

Living here could definitely turn out to be exciting.

~ ~ ~

A few days later you woke up to laughter and Jackie's screams.

The door flew open and she stormed in, covered in a towel. "I can't believe it! I can't believe they did this!" She walked over to the mirror and looked at her hair totally in panic.

Still very sleepy you rubbed your eyes and got out of bed. "Did what? What are you talking about?"

"They put bleaching in the shampoo!" She was close to tears. Her hair had now quite a lot of blonde strands that looked like somebody had drawn them with a paint brush. In other words, it looked horrible.

However, Jackie still wanted to go to school. Perfectly ambitious as always. She managed to take George's Baseball Cap and hid her hair with it, it didn't really match her style but better than nothing.

When you came home from school you walked right into a very angry Katherine and a bunch of boys who looked absolutely pissed.

"What's up?", you asked curiously, almost regretting it as Isaac sent you a deathly glare.

Lee lowered his voice. "Your sister is a sneak. She told Katherine what happened today."

Jackie, why... you sighed heavily before running up the stairs to your room. You couldn't believe that she told Katherine. You stormed into your room and walked straight up to her desk where she was sitting and doing her homework. "Why did you do that? You know that you just ruined your chance to be accepted by them, don't you?"

Jackie frowned, clearly not agreeing with you. "What else should I have done? Just accept it and act like it didn't happen?"

You shook your head, grinning. "No way, let's give them a taste of their own medicine. Let's see if they go to school with... let's say... pink hair."

You spent the next two days preparing everything for your revenge.

Jackie was not really helpful, in fact she seemed like she wanted to stop you. "Please, Y/N, don't do it. They were grounded, I think that's enough."

"Fuck no!" You had a plan and you were going to go through with it.

While the others were having their dinner you sneaked into the boys rooms and put hair dye in their shampoo. Lee, Isaac, Cole, you got them all.

No wonder that the next day you were woken again by screams and laughter. Excited you kicked off your blanket and jumped out of bed.

Who has been the first to fall into your trap? Hopefully Cole! You couldn't stand his arrogant behaviour and you also didn't get why your sister seemed so faszinated by him.

You opened your door and couldn't help but laugh. Isaac had just come out of the bathroom, a look of horror on his face. Most of his hair was bright pink. It was hillarious!

The only negative thing about it was, that the other boys were now warned. They would for sure control their shampoo before using it.

"New York is tougher than I thought", laughed Cole, eying your sister as she covered her mouth, trying not to laugh too hard.

"I'm sure that wasn't her", said Nathan before he turned towards you, "It was you right?"

Isaac's eyes widened as he also turned around to look at you.

You leaned against the doorframe, grinning. "Don't underestimate me, Garcia!"

Isaac POV:

Wow, he couldn't deny that he was impressed. He had branded you a popular spoiled girl, a city girl who got everything she wanted, daddy's little darling. Guess he was wrong. You were tougher than you looked.

He eyed you as you stood there laughing. He definitely had to be careful. You were not only beautiful you were also not afraid of standing up for yourself and messing with the boys.

A little smile escaped his lips and he ran a hand through his hair. "Good one, Y/N"

You raised your head proudly.

Long after you disappeared into your room he still stood there, grinning.

Your POV:

The following days you were extremely careful, looking out for Isaac's revenge.

You showered at 4 in the morning so that you didn't cross paths and used freshly bought shampoo. You locked your room and sat as far away from him as possible during breakfast and dinner. Except for "Good morning" you didn't really talk to each other.

To your surprise he knocked at your door one afternoon. "Hey, Y/N, wanna play videogames together?"

You turned around, closing your maths book. "Do you really think I'm this stupid?"

He blinked. "What?"

"If you want to play a trick on me, you have to try harder. I'm not following you in the living room. I bet you have some slime that falls down on me when I walk through the door."

Isaac looked at you perplex. "Nope, I just want to get to know you better. You seem cool." He grinned. "But that's an incredible idea!"

"No pranks?" You raised your eyebrow and Isaac nodded. "No pranks, I promise."

The two of you got along surprisingly well the whole time. Isaac had some snacks and drinks prepared and he showed you his favourite video game.

After a few initial difficulties, things didn't go so badly anymore. "You're not as bad as I thought."

You took another bite of chocolate. "And this from the mouth of Isaac Garcia. I feel honored."

"Yes, you should!"

Since then the two of you often met for video game sessions. He wasn't as annoying as you thought. In fact he was really cool and fun to be with.

Jackie still didn't like him and gave you a disapproving look whenever she saw you together. You didn't really get what her problem was. She was the one who constantly hung out with Cole! Isaac was a saint compared to him.

~ ~ ~

In the last few weeks you were also starting to spend more time with Lee.

He soon grew to be one of your closest friends. (You really thought it was necessary to have a best friend who isn't a close friend to your sister. You wanted your own life after all and not just a cheap copy of your sister's)

How this friendship with Lee started? Well, being the daughter of the famous designer Angelica Howard could be hard. Everyone expected perfection, even if they didn't say it explicitly. Most of the activities you did were only because they would look nice on your CV.

At the Walters' house you had the chance to finally choose hobbies that you really liked. So you wanted to try skateboarding.

One afternoon when the majority of the Walter boys were out to watch Parkers match you took Lee's skateboard that was leaning next to the door.

It took a few attempts until you were able to stand on it without holding on to the wall. Getting around with it was even more difficult. Again you fell to the floor.

How did Lee make it look so easy? You were glaring at the skateboard as you heard a chuckle behind you.

"That looked painful."

You turned your head and saw the Garcia brothers standing there.

Isaac walked towards you and offered you a hand. You took it and he helped you to your feet.

Blushing you rubbed the back of your neck and smiled at Lee apologetically. "I'm sorry for taking your skateboard, Lee."

To your surprise Lee didn't seem angry at all. "You wanna learn it?"

"Sure"

"Okay, I'll teach you how"

Lee wasn't that good at explaining, his teaching methods were more like: I show you how easy it is by driving around and beeing absolutely cool and then it was your turn and you made an absolute fool of yourself (which Jordan captured on camera - thank you very much!).

Isaac's POV:

He couldn't stop smiling. The way you tried so hard not to fall off, your hands stretched out, looking for balance.

Soon he found himself watching you practise everyday and it wasn't boring at all. He enjoyed watching as Lee told you what to do and he even offered to give you a hand when you tried to make turns.

You were a fast learner - or at least faster than he himself when Lee tried to teach him some tricks.

"You're getting better and better", Lee said, clearly proud of himself as a teacher and proud of you, his student.

"Soon you'll turn into a real skatergirl", grinned Isaac and you gave him the brightest smile possible.

He stared at you, feeling his heart racing in his chest. Yes, he couldn't deny it anymore, he had fallen in love with Y/N Howard.

~ ~ ~

Your POV:

Lucy's Birthday. You had feared that day since the accident. And even though Jackie tried to act tough and strong you were pretty sure that she struggled just as much as you did.

While the others left for school in the morning you pretended to be sick and stayed in bed till afternoon, staring at the ceiling.

"Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you" Your words were quiet, your voice shaking. "Happy Birthday dear Lucy, Happy Birthday to you."

Tears streamed your face as you whispered her name. Again and again. Lucy.

Jackie never wanted to talk about her or your parents. It had been months since you last said her name. It left a bitter note on your tongue.

Abruptly you sat up. You needed to get out, you needed to stop thinking about her.

Making sure that nobody saw you, you sneaked in the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of vodka. Katherine had tried to hide it, not knowing that you watched her.

The bottle in your hand you left the house, walking towards the barn. The loft seemed like the perfect place to get wasted. In any case better than your room since you didn't know when Jackie would come home.

You climbed up the ladder and sat down on the floor, your feet dangling above the ground.

Lucy. There weren't enough words to describe how much you missed her. Her spirit, her energy. You had always felt closer to her than to Jackie - not that you didn't love Jackie but she was always so perfect that you felt like you couldn't keep up with her. Lucy on the other hand was popular and outgoing just like you. For her school wasn't the number one priority. Her grades were good but not perfect.

"Hey" Isaac's voice snapped you out of your daydreams. "What are you doing up there?"

You held up the bottle of vodka. "Celebrating!" Your voice cracked, sounding drunk already.

Isaac rised an eyebrow. "What are you celebrating?"

You shrugged, taking another sip. You didn't wanna talk about Lucy, you didn't even know if you could say her name without bursting into tears. "My miserable life?", you suggested.

Isaacs expression changed from slightly amused to worried. He climbed up the ladder and sat down next to you. "Are you okay?"

The question was so absurd that you bursted out laughing. "Yes, yes I'm totally fine!" You handed him the vodka and without taking his eyes off you, he took a sip.

You didn't want to think about anything. Not about Lucy, not about your parents not about school.

You needed something to distract you, something better than alcohol. In New York you always went partying with your friends when you felt like your world was falling apart. Here in Colorado you felt more lonely than ever. Maybe you just needed to feel alive again.

Without thinking about possible consequences you grabbed Isaac by the collar of his shirt, pulled him towards you and kissed him.

Isaac's POV:

Was this a dream? Was this really happening? Did you maybe just kiss him because you were drunk? Did you really want this?

His heart was pounding violently in his chest as he felt your hands in his and your kisses against his lips. He pulled you closer towards him, leaning against you.

He had wanted to kiss you for a while now and even though he mostly seemed so confident, he hadn't found the courage to tell you.

He asked Lee about you once or twice, trying to find out if you liked him too but either Lee didn't knew it or he didn't tell him. What cheek! What else was a brother for, especially when he was best friends with the girl Isaac loved?

His kisses became more passionate. Hugging you and spreading soft kisses on your neck, he whispers: "I'm in love with you."

You giggled, kissing him. It would definitely be best if you didn't show up for dinner.

Isaac actually hadn't thought that you were so heavily drunk, he only noticed it when you two tried to climb down the ladder again.

You giggled, trying to keep your balance what nearly gave him a heart attack. It almost took you twenty minutes.

Isaac grabbed your hand and dragged you towards the house. "Please be quiet!", he begged you while trying to get a glimpse where all the others were.

Had they already gathered in the kitchen, ready for dinner? "Lee!" He whisper-shouted as he saw his brother and signaled him to come outside.

"What's wrong, bro?"

Isaac only gestured towards you, while you were trying to stand on one leg, giggling and blabbering.

Lee stared at you in shock. "Holy shit! She looks totally drunk."

"She is", Isaac confirmed. "We need to get her to her room before Katherine sees her!"

"What if Jackie tells her? She's always trying to act right, remember."

Isaac bit his lip. That was right. Jackie had already proved that she was a sneak.

"We bring her in our room", Lee suggested, "Nobody will notice and we can take care of her until she feels better."

Okay, that sounded like a plan!

"I'll distract the others!" Lee hurried back into the kitchen, making sure the others didn't come out.

Isaac kneeled down in front of you. "Hold on to me. I'm gonna give you a piggybag ride"

You wrapped your arms around him, laughing. "I bet that's fun!" You talked loudly, way too loudly.

Isaac heard Katherine's voice. "Was that Y/N?"

"I don't think so!", Lee answered quickly, trying to block the door, "She said she would be home very late. She has to prepare a talk for literature class with one of her friends - I guess her name was Grace."

He kept talking and talking while Isaac hurried up the stairs, carrying you on his back. There wasn't the right word to describe how relieved he was, when he finally entered his room and laid you down on his bed.

Your POV:

As you woke up the next morning your head was aching. You tried to sit up but stopped in the middle of the movement - and not just because you felt you might need to throw up due to the drinking yesterday.

This wasn't your room. You took a look around, wondering how you got here.

Isaac was lying on the floor next to you. The other bed on the other side of the room was empty. Lee had already left.

Was it already this late? Damn, you didn't want anyone seeing you sneaking out of one of the boys bedroom, especially when you still felt that you were about to throw up. You were sure that they would assume the worst.

Your memory of yesterday was very vague. In fact you only remembered drinking and... oh shit, snogging Isaac. Damn, why did you do that?

It's gonna be so weird sitting next to him during lunch and dinner and seeing him basically the whole day because you lived together.

You covered your face in embarrassment. Okay, stay cool. It was just snogging. Just snogging. You were pretty sure it didn't mean much to Isaac either. He always acted like the cool boy with his leather jacket and his macho posturing.

Slowly you started to stand up and grabbed your shoes that were lying next to the bed.

Isaac moved. You must have woken him up by accident, because he grumbled softly to himself and sat up. His hair looked like a mess but it suited him surprisingly well. "Morning, Y/N" He smiled at you and leaned in for a kiss but you backed away shocked.

"What are you doing?!"

Isaac hesitated, clearly confused. "Well... after last night I thought..."

"You thought what?", you snapped, regretting how harsh it sounded as you saw how hurt Isaac looked.

"I thought we were... we kissed, I told you I loved you..."

Your face starts to burn. "You WHAT?!"

"Don't you remember that?"

"No!" You gathered your stuff and stormed out of his room, not caring anymore if somebody saw you.

All you wanted was to get away from this situation as soon as possible. You had never been good at expressing your feelings or solving conflicts. You were only good at running away.

You ran towards the room that you shared with your sister, threw the door open and stormed inside.

Jackie let out a surprised squeak. "Y/N, you scared me to death"

You kicked the door shut and threw yourself on your bed.

Jackie didn't seem to notice how upset you were. She was lost in her own chaos. "I did something very stupid", she whispered after a few minutes of silence.

You looked at her in surprise. Jackie and doing something stupid? These were words that you normally wouldn't put in one sentence.

You walked over to her and sat down on the egde of her bed. Only then did you notice that she looked just as hungover as you felt. Was she also drinking? "I'm pretty sure what I did is way worse" you said, trying to cheer her up a little bit and offering her a guilty smile.

She shook her head, half smiling, half crying. "I went to a party with Cole and I... I was drinking way too much... I almost kissed him in front of Erin and the whole group... and when I came home and Alex tried to be there for me, I tried to kiss him too."

You looked at her in disbelief. You had never thought that she would ever do something like that.

She leaned over to you and pulled you into a hug.

"Hey, it's all gonna work out, okay?" You rubbed her back soothingly. "Seemed like you took a break from being the good and perfect girl."

She rolled her eyes, smiling. Then a thought crossed her mind and she looked at you questioningly. "Y/N, you said yours would be worse...what did you do?"

"Oh" You blushed a deep shade of red. "I was snogging with Isaac."

"YOU WHAT?" She stared at you wide-eyed.

"I was drunk, way too drunk... I just wanted some distraction from thinking about Lucy and then... it just happened..."

"How much did you drink? And on top of that Isaac?!"

You knew that she couldn't stand him, especially since his prank on her. "Jackie, please, I don't want to talk about it, not yet."

She nodded even though you could see that there were lots of questions swirling around in her head.

Since you didn't want any lunch, Jackie forced you to at least go down for dinner. The Walters were already sitting at the table when the two of you came in. Isaac stared at you angrily. You avoided his gace and sat down as far away from him as possible.

~ ~ ~

Thanksgiving. The first Thanksgiving that you wouldn't celebrate with your family.

You tried to keep busy in order not to think about it.

While you were helping Katherine in the kitchen, Isaac and Lee got ready for their video call with their dad.

Lee picked out a black shirt and even a tie. It was cute to see him so excited as he asked you at least five times if he looked good and if his hair was fine.

"You look amazing", you told him with a big smile, brushing aside the single strand of hair that hung in his face.

Lee nodded excitedly and hurried outside the room.

Isaac still seemed to be angry with you as he walked right past you without even looking at you. He didn't bother dressing smartly but you still thought that he looked very handsome. He always did.

"Can you prepare the vegetables, Y/N?", Katherine asked and handed you the bowl and the different ingredients.

Danny was responsible for the dishes and they looked really amazing. He even let you try a single bite of it. Delicious.

Katherine turned towards you. "Do you know when Jackie comes back?"

"She didn't tell me." Secretly you suspected that she would try to join the fiest as late as possible. That's just the way Jackie was. Acting strong and pretending everything was fine when really she was hurting.

The door flew open and Lee stormed inside. You had never seen him this angry and hurt before.

You jumped to your feet, almost dropping the little bowl of Vegetables. "Lee, what happened?"

Lee didn't answer. Instead he opened a bottle of wine, ready to get wasted.

You turned towards his brother who has just entered the room, looking just as unbothered as he did before. "Isaac, what's up with Lee? What happened?"

He turned around, glaring at you. "Don't act like you care. I know you don't."

His words hit you like a knife. You could feel the others staring at the two of you and your cheeks started burning. "What? Of course I care! How can you say that?"

"Okay" He raised his hands defensively but his expression said 'whatever'. "Guess you do care about Lee then."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Oh come on, you know that exactly! You played me like a toy and you couldn't have cared less about it!" He stormed out and you were so bewildered that you just stood there not knowing what to say.

It didn't help that everyone was staring at you, their faces asking clearly "What happened between you two?"

Avoiding to look at them, you ran out of the kitchen and up to your room. Why did he say that? You didn't play him, did you?

Nevertheless his words hurt you deeply, deeper than other people's words normally did. He seemed to hate you and you... you missed spending time with him. Did you have feelings for him?

You shook your head fiercly. When you moved here you had decided that it would be better not to rush in a relationship. Especially since you still struggled with the loss of your family. You needed friends, not some drama about boys.

~ ~ ~

The great bonfire, the party everyone was waiting for.

Of course you also couldn't wait for it. A party! Amazing! Finally some distraction!

You got ready with your sister and your friends. It was hard talking to Jackie alone the past few days. Since she and Alex started dating, he was always around, barely giving you two some sister time.

Originally you had planned to spend the whole party with her and your friends but then Alex and Cole started making their usual drama about who gets to be with Jackie. Pretty annoyed you walked off - which Jackie didn't even notice.

Lost in thought you stood in front of the bonfire, staring into the flames.

"Y/N" Lee walked up to you, a worried expression on his face. "Are you okay?"

You didn't want to ruin his evening so you forced a smile and tried to forget about Cole and Alex' drama for once.

You poked Lee in the cheek and grabbed his arm. "Yeah, I really like the party. You know... the partys in New York are totally different from here."

A soft smile escaped his lips. "What are they like? Tell me about it."

"Well..." How should you describe the feeling, the unique style, the atmosphere? To be honest the only comparism that hit you was: "They are just like Jackie."

Lee raised his eyebrow, looking confused but curious. "What do you mean 'like Jackie'?"

You shrugged. "They are perfect in every way. Glamorous even. Everyone is wearing beautiful dresses and drinking fancy cocktails with straws. They are talking about their dreams and their plans for the future. Most of the people I know have already figured it out." It often felt like you didn't belong there.

Lee watched you attentive.

"Most of the parties I went to were organized by students in order to get extra credits. They seemed like a ball for a princess." You couldn't help but laugh. "I prefered the clubs. Dancing like tomorrow didn't matter and like nobody was watching. I have only been there twice." As a minor it was hard to get in, but Lucy had always found a way.

Lee looked amused. "And now you're here, playing beer pong and standing around a huge bonfire. No cocktails, no glamour."

"Yes, it feels like two different worlds."

"Which one do you prefer?"

"Honestly? This one here. No need to be perfect, just having fun and being yourself."

He chuckled and you took a sip from your drink. "By the way...have you seen the others? I want to convice Jackie to play beer pong against me. That could be my one and only chance to be better than her." Also she needed distraction from the Alex and Cole drama.

You stood on your tiptoes, searching the crowd for familiar faces. You turned around and you saw them, right next to the fireplace. Your heart clenched.

Isaac and one of the cheerleaders. The girl looked amazing. Of course she did, all cheerleaders did.

Don't cry. Don't cry. Damn, you could feel the tears in your eyes.

Lee stroked your back comfortingly. Hell, you were angry.

So goddamn angry, but not at Isaac or the girl, you were angry at yourself. You've had your chance and you pushed him away. Guess you deserved this.

Isaac POV:

He laughed as the girl in front of him said something about the party last weekend. He didn't pay attention what it was, honestly he couldn't care less.

Every now and then he stole glances over his shoulder to make sure you had noticed him and were still watching. I mean, what was the purpose of making you jealous when you didn't see it?

Yes! You were close to tears! He couldn't help but feel happy about it. After all it meant that you liked him, didn't it?

Lee was standing right beside you, his arm around your shoulder. Isaac's smile froze.

"Hey, are you okay?", the girl asked him. He didn't even remember her name.

"Mh? Yeah, yeah I'm fine." When he looked in your direction the next time, you were gone. Panic started to rise within him. Had he gone too far? Was it a horrible plan?

"I'm sorry, I have to go", he told the cheerleader, not caring that he interrupted her. Well, her story wasn't very interesting anyway.

Without waiting for her response he hurried over to his brother, looking around if you were anywhere near him. "Bro, where is she?"

Lee nodded in the direction in which you had walked off. "She wanted to be alone. Guess your brillant plan backfired."

Damn, he was right. But still he didn't regret going through with it. At least he knew now that you liked him because what other reason could your reaction have? "Did you tell her?"

Lee was clearly offended by this question. "About your plan to make her jealous? No, I promised not to, remember? Damn, just go and talk to her! You act like a seven year old!"

Lee's words made Isaac's face burn with shame. He was right, wasn't he? He really acted like a little kid. Hoping he hadn't messed completely with you, he followed you.

Your POV:

You turned as you felt someone walking up beside you. Isaac. His pretty cheerleader was nowhere to be seen.

"Hey" You forced a smile, pretending that everything was fine. You were getting better at it lately.

Isaac looked at you, worried and maybe also a bit guilty. "Is everything okay? I saw how sad you looked when you walked away from Lee."

You shook your head, smiling. "Oh, it's fine." Damn, talking to him was harder than you thought. Why was he suddenly so nice to you? He has been ignoring you or glaring at you for days, maybe weeks, and now... he left this pretty girl in order to talk to you? That boy really was a mystery.

"Look, I'm fine, Isaac. Why don't you go and have fun talking to that cheerleader girl. She seemed to fancy you." You didn't mean to sound this annoyed and bitchy.

"But I would rather talk to you, Y/N", Isaac said and suddenly he looked even more guilty. His face burning bright red he rubbed the back of his head. "I just talked to her... to make you jealous."

What? You couldn't help but stare at him. Your heart did a somersault out of joy. The relief you felt... did that mean that you liked him?

Your silence seemed to make Isaac feel insecure. He lowered his head. "Sorry, that was a stupid idea... it's okay if you don't like me."

"No that's not..." you hurry to say, "I'm sorry for what happened that day in the loft and for the way I behaved afterwards. I should have apologised way earlier." You avoided looking at him and stared into the pitch black night instead. "I didn't want to get emotionally involved... it wasn't sure how long Jackie and I would stay here after all. It wouldn't be fair to start a relationship and then move away a few weeks later."

Isaac laughed and you looked at him bewildered. "What's so funny about that?"

"Well... everything. You say a relationship wouldn't be fair but what you did is even more unfair! You made me fall in love with you, you kissed me and then you ran away and acted like it didn't happen. Like it wasn't a big deal."

You didn't know what to say. He was right and you knew it. But that didn't matter now. He just confessed to you! Your heart felt like dancing in your chest.

"Why don't you give it a try, Y/N?" His voice was soft, almost sensitive. He took your hand, his thumb gently stroking the back of your hand.

You didn't know what to answer. Should you tell him that you were afraid your uncle would take you back to New York and that saying goodbye to him would be even harder? That you tried not to get too close because you were never good at showing your emotions? That you were afraid you would hurt him again because that's just the way you were?

A thought crossed your mind. Starting over new, that's what you had wanted when you came here. You wanted to leave the old Y/N and all her problems and insecurities behind and use the chance to become someone new. Maybe this also meant giving Isaac a shot. You liked him, so maybe you should stop running away. Maybe you should break your rules of not getting too close to someone while you were here.

You stepped closer and reached out your hand to touch his cheek. His eyes widened with joy. Slowly the two of you leaned forwards, your lips touching in a sweet and gentle kiss. He seemed restrained, almost fearing you would change your mind and pull away again. To prove to him that you wouldn't run away this time, you pulled him closer and intensified the kiss.

For a moment you forgot everything around you, you only concentrated on the feeling of his lips against yours and his warmth. When you slowly start to pull away, you couldn't stop smiling.

"We don't have to rush things. And I promise I won't show you off like a trophy in school." He chuckled, clearly thinking about the way Alex and Jackie acted - all touchy and totally embarrassing. It was so gross walking through the hallway and seeing them snogging in front of everyone.

"That's very good to know", you smiled back. Your decision was right, you could feel it deep inside you. Isaac Garcia was worth breaking your own rules.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

[4m1rz]

Wild Halloween

Aespa Giselle X Male Reader

Tags: Alley sex, public(-ish) sex, clothed sex, creampie

P/S 1: Special thanks to @torotauri21 and @russett-pots for helping me proofreading this

Ah yes, it's Halloween. The season where all kids wear costumes while getting candies around the neighbourhood. It's also the season when most places throw parties where the participants attend the party while wearing any costumes that they prefer.

Things appear similarly with Kwangya University as the university dean announced the university's annual Halloween party on Halloween night. Everyone in the university is very excited to join the party, except for Ong Sungho.

Ong Sungho is the nerdiest and quietest student in Kwangya University. Still, he did have some friends in the university, but only who's in his circle of friendship. One thing that everyone knows about him is that he DESPISES parties. He hates the ambience of the party and he is too shy to interact with other people who aren't very close to him. Even if his friends ask him to join, he persistently says that he won't come to the party.

However, this time, he has no choice but to come to this year's Halloween party. The reason is, his girlfriend persuades him to go and she also teasingly threatens him that if he doesn't go to the party, he won't get any affection from her. Until now, he remembers the threat that his girlfriend gives to him even though it's just a teasing threat.

Surprisingly, this quiet boy is able to get a girlfriend despite being shy to interact with anyone who isn't close with him. What is even more surprising is that his girlfriend is the most popular girl in the university, Aeri Uchinaga or commonly known around the university as Giselle.

Well, how exactly is this quiet nerd boy able to get the most popular girl in the university as his girlfriend? It turns out that both of them are actually childhood friends that are able to study at the same educational faculty till university. He and Giselle would be considered inseparable because they would do anything together.

Well technically, she's the one who is always close with him. She even joked to him that if he still didn't have a girlfriend, she would offer herself to become his girlfriend. Who knows that her joking comes to reality when they both become a couple for real.

However, compared to Sungho, Giselle is very out going which means she makes friends very easily. Plus, she is adored by the boys and girls in the university due to her beauty. It's a shock for everyone to know the news of her dating with the quietest, nerdiest student in the university.

Back to the recent timeline, Ong Sungho is walking with his close friends, Renjun and Jeno, towards the university hall where the Halloween party is being held. Sungho is wearing a Joker costume that is based from a game that he's been playing which is Mortal Kombat 11. His other two friends both respectively wear a costume of Goku(Renjun) and Barney(Jeno).

"Man, I can't believe that girlfriend of yours is able to force you to attend this year's Halloween party." His friend, Jeno, teases you. "Well, he has to because he wouldn't get cuddles from her if he didn't attend." His other friend, Renjun, adds up. The two of them then continue to tease him more while he is only able to roll his eyes because he didn't want to argue more.

"By the way, didn't you hate Joker? Why do you have to wear this costume then?" Jeno asks. "I don't know, she asked me to wear it. She says that she wants us to do a couples costume." Sungho sighs after answering that. "Oh, I guess she's dressed as Harley Quinn then." Renjun states which makes Sungho to just lift up his shoulders indicating he is clueless.

Soon, the three of them arrive at the university hall. When they enter the hall, they see other students with their respective costumes doing their own stuff. Some of them are eating the foods that are available at the party while some are just talking with their friends.

Still, Sungho didn't notice his girlfriend amongst the crowd. Therefore, he follows his two friends to get something to eat and drink. After a few hours, he starts to feel bored and left out in the party. He also wonders why his girlfriend isn't at the party yet. Little does he know that his girlfriend is preparing a surprise entrance during the dance session later on.

At around 10 PM, the peak of the party arrives, which is the dancing session. Everyone starts to dance to the music that is played throughout this session. Even Sungho is dancing with his friends in that moment. But to be honest, he is only dancing because his friends forced him to. Also, he doesn't want to feel left out which makes him want to dance. Nevertheless, he is lowkey enjoying it.

All of a sudden, the music changes into sexy vibes. With the music changing, 4 girls enter the hall. It turns out to be the 4 queens of Kwangya University which consists of Karina, Winter, Ningning and the one who is always in Sungho's mind, Giselle. All 4 of them have similar types of outfits based on DC female characters, Karina as Catwoman, Ningning as Supergirl, Winter as Wonder Woman and Giselle, like Renjun told him earlier, wears as Harley Quinn.

With the sexy vibe continuing, the first thing that Giselle does is go to her boyfriend once she sees him. "Hey babe, you look so handsome in your outfit." Giselle chimes. Sungho can only smile and thank her. "Well, you look stunning, my baddie jagi." He says, which causes Giselle to chuckle a little.

They then both start to dance to the rhythm of the music. It all went well until a few minutes later, Sungho realized that his girlfriend started grinding her ass on his crotch. At that time, he realized that she was trying to make him aroused. She then spins, facing him and whispers. "I know that you're kinda bored at the moment, and also aroused hehe~. I could even feel your boner. Well, I am feeling aroused as well, so let's ditch this party and go to your place, shall we?~"

Without letting him reply, Giselle pulls Sungho towards the hall door and leaves the party. Since his place is not far from the university, they decide to just walk until they reach there. In fact, they have been doing this every single time since the first day of their university years. However, without him knowing, she had a very naughty idea in her mind.

As they both walk past a dark alley, Giselle suddenly pulls Sungho towards the dark alley area. "Y-Yah jagi, why are you pulling me here into this alley? My place is very close, and you know that." He tries to argue.

She giggles before answering him. "Hehe~. I started to feel horny after we left the party." She then turns around, facing the wall of the dark alley and continues to persuade her boyfriend while shaking her ass. "Besides, didn't you tell me that you wanna try to have public sex with me? Now's the chance for you to make it a reality."

After his girlfriend said that to him, Sungho has the courage to do what Giselle's planning. He then gets closer to his girlfriend's ass while quietly fishing out his dick out of his pants and boxers. He then pulls up his girlfriend's skirt, seeing there's no panties before rubbing his length at her slit.

"Seems like my naughty baddie jagi is prepared for this. Here I go…" He teases her before inserting his dick into her in one go. Giselle yelps a little before releasing an inaudible moan, mouth gaping once she feels the penetration. "Mmm, j-jagi. S-So good!!!"

The thrusting of Sungho's dick goes faster and deeper into Giselle's pussy, as both of them, especially Giselle, show more of her skin. Her boobs are freely dangling, which he takes the opportunity to grope them. As soon as he starts to grope her boobs, she whimpers as her body feels so sensitive due to the fucking.

"D-Don't stop, babe… I'm a-about to c-c-cum-m.~~" Giselle chimes which then Sungho goes near to her ear to whisper to her. "T-Then do it, cum!!" With that, she cums hard, lets a long, yet a moderate moan due to still being in public. They both rest a couple of minutes before Sungho flips her girlfriend, facing him. "Just so you know jagi, I haven't cum yet." He said before starting thrusting back his dick into her pussy.

“J-Jagi, I-I’m still sensitive. Stop, please!!” She tries to stop him from fucking her but unfortunately, her attempts are futile. “Do you r-really want me to stop though? Your pussy suggests otherwise, c-clamping my dick tightly.” He chimes, which makes her want to protest but she can’t. And with that, he continues to fuck his girlfriend with no effort at all.

“I still can’t believe you pull me to this dark alley just to fuck when we both know that my house is close.” He says, teasing her girlfriend. Giselle couldn't do anything other than whining and whimpering, as she's still getting her pussy pounded by her boyfriend.

"Luckily, there's no one walking in this area. If not, they'll see how slutty you look now, jagi. Also, it seems like you're the one who's more excited to have sex in public instead of me." Sungho continues his teasing. Despite her moaning, she is able to respond. "It's b-because I want to satisfy you, b-babe. You have s-said about it for too many times which makes me even aroused just thinking about doing it for real."

Another few more minutes have passed and Sungho starts to feel his dick throbbing inside his girlfriend's pussy. This also alerts Giselle that he's about to cum. "Go on then, babe. Cum deep inside me. I'm still safe, remember?" She states.

With 3 more powerful thrusts, he pushes his dick deep inside her pussy before blasting his saved up cum into her. With his orgasm, it also triggers her second orgasm for the night. It takes around 10 minutes for them to relax after their joint orgasms. He then pulls his dick out from her pussy and sees some of their combined juices leaking out from her.

"Wow, that was amazing… I'm glad that I could fulfil your kink, babe." Giselle chimes, which makes him snicker a little. And with that, they both fix their clothes back on before resuming their way to their actual destination.

P/S: After almost a year, my second fic is done... Man, this really blows my mind to complete it just to complete this fic. Anyways, hope you guys like it

[lovers-rck]

little secret | abby anderson x reader.

summary abby anderson likes to read, and you like abby anderson. | friends to lovers, +18.

okay.... this is the longest fic i ever written (i think)

enjoy

but before, help palestine with one click.

☆

You met her in winter. The immensity of the stadium they called home impressed you, a reconstructed civilization within an abnormality hard to ignore.

Even though she was the most respected soldier in the place, your memory ranks her welcome as the warmest. Between fluffy sweaters and worn leather jackets, Abby showed you a warmth that made Seattle's monstrous winter seem like a light summer breeze.

In addition to showing you the place where you would now live, immense and so functional it was frightening, Abby showed you more than the visible. As time passed, shyly, Abby took her time to show you her jokes, her favorite books, (of which there were many, you decided) her strange ways of combining food to kill hunger longer, her wounds; the internal and the external.

The personal library that Abby had begun to assemble when she arrived at W.L.F. was now familiar to you. When responsibilities left and the moon was present in the atmosphere, the two of you spent the night in that place. The bookshelves acted like skyscrapers over your bodies sitting on the floor, filled with books and comics that the W.L.F. soldiers encountered on their daily patrols.

"I think they're going to end up together" Abby mutters, her nose buried between the pages of an old red-covered book.

"You said the same thing about the other book last night" You replied. Youdidn't share the same passion for reading as Abby, but you enjoyed listening to her tell you about her new readings and her theories about what might or might not happen in those pages.

You liked that contrast with the soldier Abby, the one everyone knew, and the Abby you knew. During the day her posture was steady, stone-eyed and scrutinizing every movement nature had to offer, attentive and ready to pull the trigger at any danger, but when night fell, her posture changed completely; usually hunched over, her features softer, more relaxed.

"It's not my fault that everyone writes the same thing" Abby rolled her eyes, putting the book aside but not before folding a corner of the page, marking where it was left "I guess it was a popular idea back in the day"

"You should write a book."

Abby let out a groan, leaning back against the bookshelf behind her. The two of you were sitting on the floor, facing each other, separated by a pile of books scattered on the library's newest acquisition: a worn purple carpet.

"I'm not in the mood for jokes" Abby blurted out.

"Why?" you asked "It wasn't a joke anyway"

"Because of Manny. He was out of control today during patrol. He almost got us killed"

You rolled your eyes "You know what he's like" Abby massaged her shoulder absently, you could see her muscles twitch "I'm sure it was nothing, you just can't stand it when people don't follow your orders"

she looked at you, her eyebrows raised "Excuse me?"

Ypu laughed lightly "It's true. You're a serial controller."

"I'm not a serial controller, for your information" Abby said "It's just not a place for jokes"

"If you say..." you mumbled, pulling your knees up to your chest and dropping the conversation; knowing Abby, she would never admit it.

"What?"

You shrugged, smiling graciously at Abby's accusatory look "I didn't say anything."

"You don't believe me" Abby scrutinized you with her gaze.

You shook your head "I didn't say that".

"But you thought it"

You rolled your eyes "Now you're a mind reader? I can see why you're considered the best soldier ever"

"There's nothing wrong with being controlling, Abs. That's the way you get everything you want. Everything you have" you continued.

Abby let out a sigh, her chest heaving, "Yeah, whatever"

The room fell into a deep silence for a couple of minutes. You decided to grab a book, trying to read it and make some sense of the words, but Abby's gaze on you prevented your brain from synapses.

"What?" you said in an accusatory tone, resting the book in your lap and looking at that blonde girl.

Now it was Abby's turn to shrug, a slight smirk planted on her face "I didn't say anything"

"Whatever."

Abby considered picking up her book as well, but saw no point in seeing the very predictable ending that the last few pages held. Your words were still echoing in her head; everything she wanted.

She, in fact, didn't have everything she wanted. Abby thought she lacked a handful of essentials; a reasonable sleep schedule, a meal that with all the proteins, a partner who wasn't a complete idiot on patrol.

But hey, those were luxuries given the circumstances.

To no one's surprise, you caught Abby's attention from the very first moment. She remembers with tenderness the first time she saw you, wet and covered with blood, hidden among the large leaves of a strange plant that had been born thanks to the combination of vegetation and fungus, with a look that Abby would never forget.

She felt the need to protect you, not because she considered you weak, but because a strange feeling led her to position herself in front of you when in the patrols you heard some infected too close, or that time when a Seraphite appeared unexpectedly and hurted you, and Abby kept chasing Mel through the corridors to remind her to be extremely careful with you.

"I know what I'm doing, Abby" she remembered how Mel told her one night "She's going to be fine"

Abby tried to convince herself that it was just that she had grown too attached to you, but something inside her told her it was something more than that, something deeper, more intense.

Abby thought she lacked a handful of things that were essential to her life, like you.

"You know, you read too many romance books" you said, snapping Abby out of her thoughts "Are you in love, Anderson?"

"Oh my god" Abby muttered "You should go to sleep, the lack of it is affecting your reasoning."

"So, is that a yes?"

"I don't choose what to read" Abby replied "I don't know if you noticed, but we're in an apocalypse. I don't have too many genres to choose from."

"You still haven't answered my question!"

Abby's muscles tensed as she could see how you moved from your position and sat closer to her, next to her. Abby could feel your arm brush against hers.

"So..." You murmured, your breath hitting Abby's lips "Tell me your little secret."

"My little secret?" Abby murmured, forcing herself to look only into your eyes.

"Who do you like?" And Abby snorted, rolling her eyes "Is it Nora? I've seen you two together a lot recently."

"No, wait, i know. It's mel, isn't it?" You continued. Your knee bumped into Abby's thigh.

"I'm not in love with Nora, or Mel, dumbass. They're my friends."

You emitted silence for a few seconds, and then:

"Is it Manny?"

"Are you kidding me?" Abby replied with a tone that made you burst out laughing, combined with all those laughs written on worn pages

"I'm sorry. I had to say it" you said with a chuckle.

Abby shook her head slowly, a smile planting itself on her face. Fucking Manny, she thought.

"So?" You said after a few minutes. Abby looked at you, her blue sapphires piercing your gaze. "Who is it?" You muttered, your voice coming out weaker than intended.

Siddenly the library became the quietest place in that giant structure. Every whisper, every sigh felt too aggressive, too loud; something that threatened to break the intimacy that the proximity of your bodies had created.

Abby slowly denied with her head, closing her eyes for a second. When she opened them again, something had changed in her gaze.

"You're not going to tell me?" You whispered. Your hand rested close to Abby's. At some point, you doubted whether your bones had turned to magnet and Abby's to metal because of the way a supernatural force was compelling you to be close to her.

She denied again, but the way her eyes flicked to your mouth for a microsecond gave her away.

"It's okay" you whispered "I think I have an idea."

The first time you saw her, that winter, you noticed that Abby had a tendency to lick her lips constantly. It didn't seem odd to you, as the winter in Seattle was very dry and lip balm was not something they were equipped with at the W.L.F, but as time went on you noticed that Abby had a tendency to lick her lips only when she was with you; when you pretended you didn't know she was looking at you, when you got close to her face to apply a lipstick you found in one of the patrolling days, when you gave her a kiss on the cheek on the morning of her birthday.

And now, just before your lips meet hers.

For the first few seconds neither of you move. Your lips linger on hers shyly, too terrified to move but refusing to pull away. Abby has to muster all her strength to move her hand to your jaw, holding you, and suddenly every shred of fear leaves her.

Your lips instantly reciprocate, too hungry, too thirsty for her taste. Abby thinks that now that she finally knows what it feels like to kiss you, she fears not being able to stop.

Her hand, which initially started on your cheek, travels down your body to your waist squeezing the flesh viciously. Her fingerprints savor every touch your body provides, skin that has been reserved for so long just for her enjoyment.

When Abby's hand makes contact with the exposed portion of skin, the air circulating through the stadium feels insufficient. Your body takes on an inhuman heat, a heat worthy of the iron emanating from the gates to hell, a heat that only she can cease.

"Abby" your lips release, a strangled moan.

"I know" She replies.

Your body was now a mass that Abby could mold as she wished. She is overcome with a sweeping euphoria as she becomes aware of the control your body offers her, and thinks maybe you were right; she likes to be in control.

You try to keep up with her movements. You touch her skin, her arms, afraid to ruin the pattern of freckles that rest perfectly on her rosy shoulders.

In a matter of seconds you end up on her lap, your legs hugging her thighs, clinging to the new sensation that Abby's shyness deprived you of for so long. Between kisses, you can hear the moans the blonde's mouth emits, weak but guttural moans.

"Can I..." Abby murmurs, her mouth on top of yours "Can I touch you?"

Your throat fails to find the strength to elicit a sound, so you just nod, eager for anything that comes from her. Instantly you feel Abby's fingers undoing your belt and unbuttoning the button of your pants, but just as you're ready for the next thing, Abby's fingers linger in place.

"What's wrong?" you ask, strands of hair interrupting your vision. Your hair feels so tousled "You don't have to if you don't want to Abs."

Abby shakes her head, her eyes drift to her hands lying in your lap, fiddling with the button "It's nothing" she murmurs "It's just.... It's been a while, you know?"

And you understand. Your fingers stroke the backs of Abby's arms.

"I understand. You don't have to be nervous" you say, trying to get her to look at you "It's just us."

Abby nods. She looks at your abdomen, the way your t-shirt hugs your waist.

"If it makes you feel any better, I never did this" you whisper, and that's all it takes for Abby to look at you.

"Never?"

you deny "Never"

"What about the redheaded girl last month? You told me things happened."

You stifle a laugh, embarrassed. Now it's your turn to look away from Abby and focus on the pattern on her shirt.

"It was stupid. We didn't do anything, it scared me" you can feel her tuck an unruly lock behind your ear, her fingertips caressing your face "It was just a silly kiss."

Abby nods slowly, her gaze still on you "Okay. Okay."

Behind the library doors, women and children walk the halls, leaders give orders and soldiers disappear behind the massive doors while others return from adventures. The world is functional again.

"Do you think it's stupid?" you mutter.

"What? No" Abby denies "It's not stupid. It's fine. Besides, it's not like we have a lot of time for that kind of thing around here"

Your lips let out a chuckle. "Yeah, that's true."

Your eyes match Abby's gaze, who smiles slightly. Her smile is sweet, friendly, you can feel the warmth that is so characteristic of her, nestling between the corners of her mouth

This time she starts the kiss. This time it is calmer, less desperate, but just as passionate. Her fingers return to what concerns them, and navigate between your pants and the elastic of your underwear.

Her fingers are cold, so you stir in her lap at the sensation and Abby laughs, apologizing softly. You quickly forget about the sharp change in temperature because you have Abby where you want her most.

Even though it's been a long time since the last time, Abby is quick to pull your panties to the side and find a rhythm that has you moaning in seconds. Your lips break the kiss several times, moans seeking air and space to make themselves present.

"Is this okay?" Abby murmurs into your neck, wet kisses planting themselves on your skin.

Your hips move against her hand, desperate "Yes Abs" the hot air of your breath hits against her ear, and Abby almost lets out the most obscene sound ever uttered "Please, keep going."

Abby's free hand massages your breasts, squeezes and fondles them. Her tongue plays with the sensitive skin of your neck, sucking and marking every inch.

The euphoria and pleasure of the moment makes you feel invincible, and your hand darts toward Abby's pants, unzipping them and finding her black boxers.

"What are you doing?" Abby says, choked words.

You ignore her and continue your task, reaching inside her underwear and trying to mimic the move you do to yourself on nights where your body lies too warm on the sheets of some room at the W.L.F. Your movements are clumsy, but they work wonders for Abby, who stifles her moans into your neck.

As her nature defines her, Abby is a competitive girl in every way, so when she feels an immense heat who tries to collapse her under your effects, her fingers pick up the pace and pull desperate moans from your throat.

There was no way Abby would finish before you.

"Abby" you moan, your fingers losing rhythm "Abby"

"I know."

It doesn't take too many seconds before your body shudders under Abby's control and moans and groans come out of your mouth, which you choke on her shoulder.

Pleasure blurs your vision and senses, so you can't anticipate when a trembling, whimpering Abby pulls your hand from her intimacy and her muscles contract accompanied by a long, shuddering moan.

You and her breathing evens out, both of your breasts moving to the rhythm of the beat that is their hearts tuned to the same station.

You look at her. She looks at you.

Abby thinks this ending is better than any book she's ever read.