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lunarticxenia · 3 years

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Moon Signs Pt. 2

Hi guys here’s part 2 of the moon sign series! After I post this, I’m going to be focusing more on answering your questions, I have a lot to answer. Thanks so much for all the support! Without further ado, here’s Libra through Pisces moons!

🌵Libra Moon: You guys LOVE attention, and you don’t even try to hide it LMAO. One of my good friends is a Libra moon and he literally loves to say outlandish things just to get a reaction from us and to get attention from us if we’re not talking to him enough in a conversation. Libra moons also love relationships and if underdeveloped they may feel incomplete without one. They can also be very dependent on their partner for happiness as well. However, they are romantic and in love with love. They’re also extremely sensitive and are very feminine. Even in men, it gives them a more feminine touch to their personality. They also hold their morals in very high regard. They have their set morals and won’t change them for anything or anyone. They also tend to hate conflict and usually shy away from confrontation. They’re also too nice, WAYYYYYY too nice. You guys need to be more assertive LMAO. They’re also extremely optimistic and if they don’t believe in that particular way they at least try to be optimistic with others. They’re always reminding you the glass is half full. Also, Libra moons are mad clingy. Even with those they’re not dating LMAO. My Libra moon friend whenever I try to leave the FaceTime Call, he’s like “Don’t go... :(”. They just love to be around the ones they love. They’re also in love with beauty, and all things beautiful in the world. They’re lovers of music, art, film, and literature. Libra moons also have a softness in their eyes, I can’t describe it. This girl I used to like has a Libra moon and her eyes were just so soft. They’re also extremely indecisive, they tend to flip flop between who they wanna be and what they wanna do. They also aren’t shy when it comes to compliments, they will compliment TF out of you. They’re the best hype man. They also put others before themselves a lot, and can be very shy upon first meeting them. However once they feel comfortable around you they open up. One last thing, I feel like they tend to like anyone who’s nice to them...don’t attack me. LMAO.

🌵Scorpio Moon: I feel like Scorpio moons have about ten different playlists relating to their emotions and still won’t open up to anyone about how they feel. Scorpio moons I feel have such intense emotions that they just don’t deal with them and they tend to implode after a while. I relate to them a lot in that respect tbh with my Sun square Moon, because that’s how I am. You guys are also super passionate and super creative. Every Scorpio moon I’ve met has been really creative in some way whether it be makeup, fashion style, or artwork. I’ve also noticed that this is a very alluring placement, there’s this intriguing way about them, and like Aries Moons, they have a fire in their eyes. Their gaze is INTENSE. They’re also very selective with who they let close to them, they don’t let just anybody in. They’re also very good at reading other people and seeing people’s true intentions. They have an extremely good intuition. If underdeveloped this can be used to manipulate other people, as well as being compulsive liars. Scorpio moons are also very protective over the ones they love. If you mess with anyone they care about, they will kill you. End of story. Also I feel like every Scorpio moon I’ve met has been through the wringer, like they’ve really had some hard experiences, it’s so sad to me. Scorpio moons are also extremely stubborn, remember this is a fixed sign. Scorpio moons ain’t playing, once they’ve settled on something, they’re not budging. Also, can we just say, masters at investigating people. These are the friends you want stalking your ex’s social media. They will find out everything. They’re also really good psychologists as well, almost all the Scorpio moons I’ve met are actually Psychology majors LMAO. They’re very good at finding the root causes of people’s issues. I also feel like Scorpio moons undergo a lot of transformations in their lives. I’ve known a Scorpio moon for about 10 years now and he’s undergone so many different transformations in his life. Mentally and physically. They’re also extremely sarcastic and have a tendency to be pessimistic. They’re also mad scary when angry. I’ve seen them angry before, as an Aries moon, even I get a little scared.... love y’all tho.

🌵Sagittarius Moon: The funniest people ever. Sagittarius moons always have me laughing my ass off. Their sense of humor is very diverse. They tend to stick with sarcasm and like to say outlandish things to make people laugh. Also, I feel like Sagittarius moons tend to go for science/math oriented careers or at least have an interest in those subjects. I know four Sag moons, and they’re all in STEM it’s actually crazy. They’re also extremely blunt and honest, especially when it comes to people they don’t like LMAO. They make it very clear when they don’t like someone, it’s so funny. They’re also just so much fun, like they’re genuinely so much fun to hang out with. I feel like I’ve never not had a good time hanging out with a Sagittarius moon. I feel like Sag moons however tend to struggle with asserting themselves a lot of times, until they get really fed up. They’re very much go with the flow kinda people, and this can be to their detriment especially with the ones they love, they don’t wanna rock the boat. However, they also make really good mediators and are good at settling arguments. They also really like to travel, and likely have traveled a lot. All the Sagittarius moons I know have traveled to at least 4+ countries. They love traveling the world, and I’ve also noticed move or want to move far away from their childhood home. They wanna explore everything the world has to offer. My cousin who’s a Sag moon left her parents’ house to move a few states away and my other friend who’s a Sag moon wants to move to the other side of the country. These individuals also tend to like foreign culture as well. I’ve noticed Sagittarius moons tend to like foreign music or foreign tv shows. I feel like they also tend to ignore their emotions when they get sad and just don’t like to deal with their emotions. They also don’t like to talk about how they feel and will brush sad things off because it’s just too upsetting for them. However, once the emotions boil over, just like their anger, they will blow up LMAO. I’ve also noticed that they’re really good at teaching people things? Like my Sag moon friend explained this Chemistry equation to me I couldn’t understand and I got it after 10 minutes. Natural teachers.

🌵 Capricorn Moon: Guys, it’s okay to open up. You don’t have to pretend to be so strong all the time, you’re not weak for showing your emotions. Anyway, Cap moons have high expectations for people, and will not tolerate any bs from people. I seriously commend them for that. I feel like Cap moons struggle with how their points are being expressed, they can say one thing, but it’s seen as something else. While Capricorn moons may struggle with expressing their emotions, I haven’t found them to be closed off or cold when meeting them. Every Capricorn moon I’ve met has warmed up to me very quickly and have been super nice. I feel like they’re very friendly and once they have a conversation with you they’re really warm and kind. Also, they’re not afraid of anything?? Except for showing their feelings maybe. But like, they’re so open to trying new things like scary rollercoasters and aren’t afraid to fight for themselves if they have to. Also, super fucking ambitious. I wish I could be ambitious. These people will really have like three jobs, be in school, and tend to household responsibilities. I don’t know how you guys do it. Now everyone says Capricorn moons are just analytical and systematic when confronted with conflict, and I personally haven’t found that to be true. If they feel wronged?? Nah. They’re not going to be systematic or logical or anything. They will go off. As for personal challenges, yes they’ll be more analytical. But I feel like everyone boils down Cap moons to emotionless and machine-like nerds, which I find to be very untrue. Capricorn moons are very soft once they’re vulnerable with you, and genuinely feel like they’re bothering people when they show their emotions and feel weak for showing them. Also I’ve noticed that their mom is a big motivator for their success. Their moms always push them to do their best in work and school. If poorly aspected, they could feel too pressured by their moms to do well. Also, they’re so underrated for being funny. They have a really dry sense of humor and it’s well developed. I also feel like they get overlooked for putting others before themselves, when it comes to the people they love they’ll do anything for them. Brb gonna go give my Cap moon friends a hug.

🌵Aquarius Moon: You guys are just so unique. There’s something unique about each and every Aquarius moon, whether it’s a quirk or a hobby. These people are literally the best to talk to. It’s so easy to have a conversation with them, they really can talk about anything. I’ve also noticed that Aquarius moons tend to be interested in astrology and tarot and things of that kind. Every Aquarius moon I’ve met has been really interested in it, and even involved in it. I feel like they also have big dreams, and have big plans for themselves. Aquarius moons also love to get lost in their music and tend to use it as an escape. This can be a problem because they tend to avoid dealing with their feelings. They also go between reacting to things really heavily vs not reacting at all. It just seems like it goes back and forth. They speak up with things are unjust however only to their friends or online. They just don’t like to deal with face to face conflict in that regard. They also give really great advice. My best friend is an Aquarius moon and she always gives me the best advice. She knows me better than I know myself tbh. I feel like Aquarius moons relish in being unique LMAO. I’m 99% sure they had an “I’m not like other girls” phase. I feel like this placement always tends to space out and daydream a lot. They also aren’t the types to just lash out at people, their anger is more subtle (unless they have other placements of course). I feel like Aquarius moons also have a lot of friends but they tend to have a small group of friends that they tend to be super super close with. They’re also...really charming? I don’t know what it is, but like every single one I’ve met has been really charming and likable. They also have a really goofy sense of humor and love to do wild shit to make people laugh. I feel like some downsides of Aquarius moons are that they tend to be too analytical and rationalize things too much, and they inadvertently invalidate other people’s feelings. Aquarius moons are also super open minded to all opinions. I have a friend who I tend to disagree with on certain issues but they’ve always been open to hearing my opinion. They also love to travel too. I’ve noticed that as well.

🌵Pisces Moon: To think, I was almost one of you guys. No seriously I almost was, if I were born four hours earlier I would’ve been a Pisces moon LMAO. Anyhoo, Pisces moons are just so sweet. I don’t know how else to start, they literally are the sweetest people and give off this mystical type of aura. They’re very otherworldly. Also, these people daydream 24/7. They put Aquarius moons to shame in daydreaming. This girl I like is a Pisces moon and I always catch her daydreaming LMAO. They’re also extremely sensitive too and feel things so deeply. They try to hide how they feel from people, but you can see it in their eyes. I can always tell when my Pisces moon friend is upset just by the look in her eyes. They also tend to be introverted and it takes a while for them to warm up to someone. My co-worker is a Pisces moon and it took 2 weeks for her to finally start talking to me LMAO. They also have really vivid and wild dreams too. I feel like my Pisces moon friend is always telling me about some wild dream they had like that they were in a castle or in an ocean. They also can be really moody, they can be fine one second and then get really sad out of nowhere. Their emotions are like the ocean. I feel like another downside of Pisces Moons are that they can be very manipulative however this is really with any underdeveloped water moon/sun placement. I also feel like they tend to be escapists a lot. They don’t like to deal with reality a lot, and they see the best in everything and everyone even if it’s to their demise. They’re also super friendly and are nice to everyone they meet, even if they’re reserved they’re still very sweet. They’re also extremely creative too, I feel like every Pisces moon I’ve ever met has some sort of creative hobby. My co-worker who’s a Pisces moon is working on becoming a photographer and her stuff is AMAZING. I think that’s because they see the best in the world and the beauty in everything; and they know how to show that in their work so others can see the world like they do. They’re also super empathetic and are really good listeners. You can talk to them about anything and feel understood. :)

So this wraps up my moon sign series! I hope you guys liked it! Again, don’t take offense these are just my opinions on each moon sign! Hope you guys enjoyed, and if you don’t see your moon sign here it’s likely in part one.

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wincore · 4 years

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AGREEEE, WORKING OVER THE WEEKEND IS THE WORST esp since im in uni full time and i work 9-5 on the weekends which means... no breaks for me ever.. 🥲

MASSIVE CRUSH ON OIKAWA OMGGG I SUPPORT THIS!!!!! but i am unfortunately much older than 15 and still enamored by 2d men 😔 life’s rough like that HDJWKDJ YES ATSUMU CAUSES PROBLEMS ON PURPOSE.. HES THE WORST!! btw.. ive heard that the oikawa to atsumu stan pipeline is very real... so if u get to s4.. u may develop atsumu brain rot like me 👁_👁

OOO alright run on, extracurricular, vincenzo, true beauty, love alarm, & perfect crime. NOTED!! ive actually been meaning to watch extracurricular for a while now, it looks so interesting!! now that it has the wincore seal of approval i must watch 😤 OMGG SAKURADA DORI I SAW HIM IN ALICE IN BORDERLAND!! super good show but really gore heavy at some points 👁

ahh ok thank u for the reccs, ive been thinking about starting demon slayer too!! shoplifters sounds really interesting :oo crime??? i havent watched a full movie in a while so i will def check it out!! THESE R ALL GOING IN MY NOTES APP.

NEXT YEARRR omg it sounds far away but i know time passes so quickly nowadays so I WILL WISH U LUCK ONCE AGAIN 💛 i hope u update us when the time comes!!

UGHWHHD EVEN THIS SYNOPSIS IS MAKING ME MISS UR WRITING?!? I LOVE THE WAY U WORD IT... “given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear” AHHHHHHH omg “he’s in a relationship and doesn’t rlly care about the soulmate system” THIS IS ALWAYS SUCH A PAINFUL SCENARIO IN SOULMATE AUS PLSS!!! Wait is the soulmate of yn gonna be an oc/vague character or another member :O EITHER WAY... PAIN! THIS IS GETTING ME SO EXCITED AND U HAVENT EVEN MENTIONED ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT JAEHYUN’S LIKE IN THIS FIC YET

RUNWAY CHARACTER CAMEOOOS YESS I LOVE RUNWAY YN!!!! i actually reread it last night and ugh i was reminded how much i love yns personality... just the process of experiencing all tht self doubt with them!!! so real & makes u root for them :’)

“if jeno plays edward i need him to that apple scene like taemin did” WHHHHHWJDJJWJDBW THIS MADE ME CHOKE ON THE WATER I WAS DRINKING LMFAO

GODDDD THESE TROPE/MEMBER PAIRINGS, HARD AGREE HARD AGREE!!! HAECHAN AND RENJUN ARE E2L 100%!!!! i think bc the ppl in the bff2l category cant convincingly hate yn back LOL

“gets complimented on his lyricism often but like every song’s about you” STOPPPPP HES SO PERFDCT FOR THIS TROPE!!!!!

OMG I SEE EXACTLY WHAT U MEAN ABT SICHENG IN ROYALTY/CHAEBOL AUS... i think like u said it’s because of his poise & the way ppl are generally in awe of him but also bc of his reluctance to open up!! more reserved until he trusts u... funny and kind but sometimes perceived as aloof... those r some prince tendencies! “what are corporate businesses but modern day kingdoms” LMFAOOWJDJ SERIOUSLY THO

“mans really said i will not give you any onscreen idol personality to work with” HDJWJDJWJSJ LITERALLYYYY this is why i have trouble reading jaehyun fics sometimes bc sometimes they can feel “inaccurate” but its mostly just bc there’s no Standard Personality Stereotype to go off of. but a random & uncommon trope i think he’d pair well with is exes to lovers!! Yes im basically just a jaehyun + angst advocate.

“i think most of them would pair well with bff2l??” FACTTTTTTT and no im not just saying this bc its one of my favorite tropes.. heh... i think i told u this before?? but ur like the main reason i started enjoying e2l!!! i didnt like it before bc i love the PINING in bff2l but then i started reading ur works n was like OH SHIT! THERES LOADS OF PINING HERE TOO...

i think yangyang is not bff2l or e2l, he is in his own category which is Annoyer2Lover HDJWKDJ ex: troublemaker, wasted nights

OMGGGG I DID NOT EXPECT ROYALTY AU TO HAVE SUCH A LARGE LEAD IN THE SURVEY??? and cryptids is so low 😔😔 cmon guys, vampires r fun!!!

WE R LITERALLY WRITING ESSAYS TO EACH OTHER RN BUT I LOVE IT 🥺🥺 its a such a nice break to read ur response when im burnt out from studying!!

OMG IM GOING THROUGH #moonwrites AND IM LITERALLY AN IDIOTTTT IVE BEEN OFF TUMBLR FOR SO LONG I DIDNT REALIZE THAT ROMEO ROULETTE HAD A PREVIEW OUT????

“And I get what out of this?” “Me?” IM IN LOVE WITH THIS CHARACTERS PERSONALITY ALREADY LMFAOO

“—and when this whole game you’re playing is over, you’re going to say I rejected you.” ?!?!???? THE WAY JAEHYUN IS A LITTLE SHIT! THEIR PERSONALITIES ARE BOTH SO FUN PLSJWJDJEJ IM MORE EXCITED NOW!!

pls disregard the part in my last ask where i asked abt romeo roulette.... i had no idea all of the information i needed was sitting right in front of me 😔😔

- tata

WHAT 9 TO 5 ON EVERY WEEKEND???? the system has failed you this honestly feels like a villain origin story 😭 when does it get better???

ALSO let me answer the other asks separately for better readability lol we really out here writing essays GOOD THING i have practice writing but like. this is infinitely better to write 🥰

PLSSS SOMETIMES I WILL SEE AN EDIT/TIKTOK OF OIKAWA AND BE LIKE DAMN I REALLY NEED TO CATCH UP I MISS THIS MF also are you daring me to ruin my life for 2d men bc i will do it without hesitation. wait till i watch hq again and get that atsumu brainrot with you he seems annoying enough for me to like ^_^

AND YES PLS I WAS SO ABSORBED IN IT!! extracurricular was the most gripping show i’ve watched in a while like yes enough teen romance give me two unhinged teenagers doing crime 🤩 AND OMG??? THAT’S WHERE WE SAW HIM TOO and although niragi was literally vomit-inducing human trash, sakurada dori is like. a good actor. except i hated coffee&vanilla which starred him it was literally so cringe i couldn’t 😭 i blame the writers for that though. IM EXCITED FOR S2 OF ALICE IN BORDERLAND THO i really like horror (and i can tolerate gore if ive been desensitized enough) and like i read the manga too!!! the games were really interesting (although morbid).

😭😭 MY NOTES APP IS FULL OF RECS FROM FRIENDS ALL OF THEM HATE ME FOR NOT WATCHING THE SHOWS BUT LIKE. i binge 3 or 4 at a time and strike them off and then go 6 months without watching a single tv series hhh.

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I SURE WILL UPDATE !!! it’s so exciting to think about grad school sometimes :33

AHHH IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT AND THE PREVIEW TOO SGSDJKDS there’s a few differences in the actual fic i think bc i changed up the language (and i dont remember what else bc i refuse to look at my writing) JAEHYUN RLLY IS A LITTLE SHIT he’ll be like hm yeah im pretty chill :) and then proceed to beat yn at her own game at times. (she wins mostly dw) the fact that i made her soulmate cha eunwoo like girl if i were you i’d crash their relationship 🥱 (jk) but like. jaehyun too is 🤩 despite being dry af

ASDKDSKDS YOU REREAD ALL (ALMOST) 19K WORDS ??? IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE THAT FIC SM AAAAHHH IM FEELING LIKE AN ACTUAL AUTHOR 🥰 i loved runway yn too they were like boss attitude with 20% anxiety.

LOOK JENO BETTER BE PULLING MOVES LIKE THAT TO IMPRESS THE GIRLS 😤 if he hits himself in the forehead with the apple, bonus points bc that was true comedy (as invented by taemin)

AND YES. LIKE I KNOW MARK HATED DONGHYUCK SO MUCH HE WANTED TO LEAVE SM BUT LIKE HE’S TOO NICE WITH EVERYONE ELSE 😭😭😭 i cannot picture him pissed off apart from that summer fight </3

thinking about dejun getting rejected by a girl he wrote a song for. rip brother.

IM GLAD YOU PUT THAT INTO WORDS BC THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT IT IS!!! he’s got all of these regal qualities but he’s still human ykyk so it makes for the most amiable person on earth 😌 i love this characterization of him!!

oof exes to lovers with jaehyun... i had a similar idea a while ago (with theme song sincerity is scary by the 1975) that i discarded bc i don’t think i’m cut out to write that 😭 (YET) so i will keep this is mind. u r so right about jaehyun feeling inaccurate bc it’s like he’s very mild in personality onscreen sometimes?? so him having strong personality traits makes me go 🤔🤔 that man is overreacting. (jkjk but like you get the idea)

WAIT RLLY OMG BC OF ME???? i would never enjoy e2l irl bc irl dudes are 🤢🤢 and if they annoy me i will end them. but in fiction the mutual pining and initial disgust at yourself for liking the other??? helllooo 🤩🤩🤩 especially if it’s in a romcom style <3 bff2l is also better in fiction bc if the relationship doesnt work out irl and the person become uncomfortable with me i will just get annoyed jskshdl

LMAO YOU ARE SO RIGHT ABOUT YANGYANG HE’S JUST THAT™ DUDE skgkhs he feels like someone fun to hang out with but he would annoy you the whole time. also he is cute 🥰

AND EXACTLY!!!! IM HAPPY FOR ROYALTY AUS BUT CMON. LOOK AT THOSE VAMPIRE TEETH. feel like media ruined vampires for people 😔

THIS IS SUCH A NICE BREAK FROM STUDYING HONESTLY!!!! im like working on two semi-large projects AND studying course and out-of-course material simultaneously so my brain is a little fried. thank u for this 😘

#tata 💖#anon #answered

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theseerasures · 5 years

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Conspicuous Media Consumption, 2019

i mean, everyone's doing these write-ups, right? might as well hop onto the bandwagon

towards the end of last year i had one of my typical existential crises about my media consumption: am i slowly disappearing up my own ass because i no longer care about most of the pop culture people like to discuss ad nauseam? but on the other hand, isn’t it more responsible to find the niche items made by non-mainstream and marginalized creators? on the third hand, wouldn’t i be much happier if i just watched FMA Brotherhood over and over again, preferably while starting a new Mass Effect playthrough at the same time?

the answer to all these questions is probably “yes,” but i decided to try something different going into 2019. for every week of the year, i would try to get through a year’s worth of content for some kind of media, be it comics, video games, TV, etc--they didn’t all have to be recent, or even new to me, but once i was done with that week i’d be done, even if i didn’t finish the content, and i’d make a judgement based what i’d seen on whether i want to continue. mostly, i was trying to avoid what happened to me with video games in 2018, when i was hating every second of playing Uncharted but still felt obligated to finish because everyone and their houseplant liked Uncharted or listlessly doing the Master Hunter achievement in RDR2 because the main quest made me miserable.

the actual outcomes of this Project(tm) are a little more complicated than anticipated--some media i could finish in a day, while trying to play through ALL THE CONTENT OF AN MMO understandably took much longer than a week--but it all kind of evened out. in the end i did 48 weeks of this, and used December as my catch-ups month to follow up on some things i didn’t get to finish. i thought i’d give my thoughts on each of the things i consumed this year as part of this project below in a concise manner--and yes, i know the people who’ve read even one (1) thing i’ve written are probably laughing right now, particularly given how long i took in this introduction just to get to me point, but i really am going to try!! it’s all an exercise in shameless self-indulgence, basically, but hey: if any of you want to chat at length about any of this stuff below, hit me up.

(quick note: you’ll only find media that i chose for this particular project below, so things i watched socially with friends--like certain film properties slorping me back into Disney’s gelatinous monolith--are not included)

Devilman Crybaby (anime, finished 1/5/2019): honestly i should have twigged onto what the year was going to be like when the first thing i drew from the metaphorical barrel was demon tiddies and apocalyptic existentialism. i was determined to dislike it for most of the year due to fundamentally disagreeing with its main thematic thrust, but i kept THINKING about it even months after. at this point i’ve kinda mellowed out. it’s definitely not a must love, but there’s enough queer metaphor and philosophical richness in it to make it worth checking out.

Attack on Titan (manga, 3 volumes finished 1/12/2019): this is the second time i’ve tried to get into this franchise and...yeah, no. i still don’t see the appeal. the fascistic overtones juxtaposed with absolutely no one having a sense of humor wigs me out to no end.

Young Justice (TV, 2.5 seasons finished 1/31/2019): honestly, what even is there to say? they’re my kids. they’re back and grown up and making even more terrible decisions. i screamed when i saw Babs in her wheelchair.

Black Leopard, Red Wolf (book, finished 2/10/2019): i tried VERY HARD to like this book, given how much i liked Brief History of Seven Killings, but it just...didn’t click for me. which honestly is fine, since i don’t think it was made for me either.

Dragon Age (3 games, finished 2/28/2019): i feel like there’s always a part of me that’s going to think of this series as “the other one,” but y’know. it’s good. it’s my second playthrough (as a mage for all three) and it’s good! i even went around killing all the dragons in Inquisition because Knight Enchanter was a blast. appreciate the higher queer content vis-a-vis Mass Effect, even though i couldn’t care less about any of the plot. Dragon Age II is the best one, do not @ me

Bitter Root (comic, 4 issues finished 3/1/2019): i love intergenerational dramas and i love stories about vampire slayers, so this was aces. my only complaint is the pacing was a little slow for a story that was going on hiatus after five issues.

Pearl (comic, 6 issues finished 3/3/2019): i know that he’s done great things and grudgingly admit that he’s probably a net positive in the industry but Brian Michael Bendis can suck my entire dick

Lazarus (comic, 5 trades finished 3/ 4/2019): i really thought this was going to clench the position for comic of the year. it’s Rucka doing Highly Relevant Dystopia! it’s a corporate Lannisters AU! it’s a highly personal story about a woman with high privilege and little agency! what more could you want

Immortal Hulk (comic, 2 trades finished 3/ 4/2019): i vibed with the horror feel, but i don’t honestly think it’s THAT exceptional. being set in 616-verse means there was still ton of baggage i didn’t know or care about, since i’ve now swung more to the DC side of things

thank u, next (album, finished 3/5/2019): didn’t Ariana Grande get canceled this year for some reason? oh well, i liked her album

When I Get Home (album, finished 3/13/2019): i vividly remember listening to this for the first time and feeling vaguely disappointed that it wasn’t more like Seat at the Table until i realized that i was covered in goosebumps. still don’t understand the magic but it is Good

The Bird King (book, finished 3/23/2019): pretty much everything you’d expect from a G. Willow Wilson book--spirituality, the female lead finding Themselves and the Answer and learning they’re the same thing, etc etc. i’m slightly resentful that her Wonder Woman was so lackluster while this was so good, but whatevs

Psychodrama (album, finished 3/29/2019): possibly my favorite album of the year? dense and emotionally raw in a way i really appreciate. Dave has a Mercury and he’s younger than me

Mass Effect (4 games, finished 4/7/2019): wow guys did you know that Mass Effect is good! it is. all of it is actually, even the Mass Effect 3 ending, another controversial finale to a big franchise that i will obstinately defend. even Andromeda, which isn’t AS good as the trilogy but still has a lot of heart. all its bugs have been exhaustively patched since launch anyway

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (TV, 4 seasons finished 5/13/2019): i’m...still kind of mad about this finale, but can’t exactly deny that this show is one of the best things to ever happen to me, or television probably. i didn’t even mind new!Greg that much! tho he was probably the nail on the coffin of me jumping onto the Nathaniel train.

Knights of the Old Republic/The Old Republic (3 games, finished 7/4/2019): did you guys know that KOTOR II was my first ever video game? i feel like that...explains a lot about me. anyway, the first game is a classic and the second is a deconstructive classic and playing either of them is basically a fun way for me to turn off my brain these days. even the MMO wasn’t as much of slog as i worried it would be. the Imperial Agent storyline had some nice surprises and i dig the general atmosphere of ruthless pragmatism and crushing loneliness.

Wanderers (book, finished 7/13/2019): Chuck Wendig is a very well-intentioned man in dire need of a strict editor. still good tho! some VERY punchy emotional bits and an ending that still leaves me with vague existential terror.

Code Geass (anime, 2 seasons finished 7/20/2019): i feel like this is on the polar opposite of the spectrum as Devilman Crybaby, because i don’t think Geass is GOOD on like, any basis, and i actually find its central moral message kind of abhorrent? but some part of my lizard brain LOVED the High Imperial Family Drama (it’s been a good year for me and Lannister types, hasn’t it? well, with the obvious exception of--never mind), so...yeah. have i discovered the true meaning of guilty pleasure

The Farewell (movie, finished 7/23/2019): how could i not a) watch this and b) love this and c) feel emotionally cold towards this at the same time because the situations depicted were so similar to mine that i ended up feeling kind of alienated

The Nickel Boys (book, finished 8/8/2019): i STILL haven’t read Underground Railroad, but here i am a book late and a dollar short to appreciate Whitehead’s new book. the man’s stylistic versatility is jaw-dropping and i appreciate the plotting in contrast to like, 90% of the litfic out there that’s just “protagonist sad in different milieu”

Durarara (anime, 2 seasons finished 8/31/2019): it’s fucking bonkers and i loved pretty much every second of it? even the second season, where i finally got the BruceNat AU i deserved??? the first anime i’ve seen where everyone was relatively soberly dressed. the answer was love and having feelings and asking your middle school best friend to hurl you like a projectile so you can chop your girlfriend’s head off with a demon katana

Lover (album, finished 9/1/2019): i feel like with all the Discourse surrounding Taylor Swift re: she’s the devil incarnate or re: she’s good, actually the fact that she makes fucking bops gets kind of lost in the conversation. i have no vested interest in her as a person but i liked Lover, even though London Boy was “what if Style but stupid”

Are You Listening (comic, finished 10/2/2019): my actual choice for best comic of the year if i were giving out awards like that. it’s coming of age! it’s grief! it’s queers! it’s trauma! it’s magical realism! it’s cats! it’s expressive gorgeous art! Tillie Walden has an Eisner and she’s younger than me

High School DxD (manga, 2 volumes finished 10/10/2019): i don’t even know how to talk about this series?? i actually kind of came around to the whole “main character is a perv but goes hard for consent” by the end of the second volume, but it’s still...bad. i only can have lingering conflicted feelings about one Japanese adaptation of Christian mythology per year

Ghosteen (album, finished 10/18/2019): much like Immortal Hulk i thought it was fine but over-hyped. it’s Nick Cave doing his Nick Cave ethereal music thing. i still can’t tell what any of the lyrics mean, except Jesus is there sometimes

Watchmen (TV, 2 episodes finished 10/29/2019): i am nOT FUCKING CAUGHT UP so please watch out for spoilers. it is on my high priority list of things to be caught up on tho--i appreciate that the plot is blatantly unsubtle but still manages to give me aneurysms and i appreciate the political overtones just kinda...balances on a razor thin wire and also gives me aneurysms. i wanna say i have no expectations and would be fine if it does a full dive into the horrible bland depths of the both-sides porridge, but i’m sadly a fool who wants to believe in Damon Lindelof

Syllabus/Making Comics (2 comics, finished 12/24/2019): it’s funny--even before Making Comics came out i was like “man i miss Lynda Barry” and then BAM. it’s incredible how her work just makes me feel taken care of, even when we’re wrestling with tough topics or she’s demanding that i draw a Batman in 30 seconds. kudos for immediately shooting to the top of my gift list for my sister also

Allegiance/Choices of One (2 books, finished 12/24/2019): fun and largely inoffensive, but i was honestly hoping for more. the level of Empire apologia going on was too much for me, someone who thinks Mara Jade is the best Star Wars character of all time (still?????? still). it reeked a little of Zahn believing his own hype as the only valid guy in Star Wars Legends of whatever

Aldnoah.Zero (anime, 1 season finished 12/24/2019): turns out i also can only have “trash but my trash” feelings about one Japanese mecha show with higher art pretensions and patriotism verging into jingoism per year, and this one ain’t it. it’s not as good as Code Geass and Code Geass ISN’T GOOD. at least Geass attempted character complexity and moved at enough of a breakneck pace to distract me from its questionable bits. Aldnoah is just...bland, and nothing gets accomplished or revealed in 12 episodes, except the baffling and contradictory motivations of the main bad guy.

Baldur’s Gate (game, unfinished): yet again something i really wanted to like, given *gestures at all the BioWare above*. i think it’s mainly the Seinfeld issue, where it actually predates my own experience with video games and was so formative for the Western RPG genre that what was innovative just comes across as kind of staid now. i didn’t DISLIKE it, and will probably play the sequel since it’s supposed to be more character-driven, but by the time i finished the vanilla campaign i just didn’t have it in me to squint at more tiny avatars on the screen, so the expansions ended up a no-go.

most prominent thing i noticed about this list is that only one 2019 movie made it on the list and ZERO 2019 video games did so. the former i’m okay with because i currently live with two film people with whom i’m happy to tag along to the cinema. the latter bums me out a little more, because there WERE a few things i wanted to play this year, but all of them came out just as my semester was reaching its catastrophic boil, so i had no time. maybe i’ll use my free time after the New Year festivities to catch up on those.

to conclude: this worked out pretty well! i ended up finishing all but one of the things, and only a few were bad enough that i have no interest in seeking out more content. i’ll probably do this again in 2020--we’ll see if the scheduling can withstand a full year of grad school hell

#let's break out a new tag for this since this isn't really meta #conspicuous media consumption

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buzzdixonwriter · 5 years

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Sci-Fi And The Sincerest Form Of Flattery

I know many of you prefer “science fiction” or “science fantasy” or “speculative fiction” or “sf” or even “stf” for short, but I ain’t that guy…

I’m a sci-fi kinda guy.

I prefer sci-fi because to me it evokes the nerdy playfulness the genre should embrace at some level (and, no we’re not gonna debate geek vs nerd as a descriptor; “geeky” implies biting heads off chickens no matter how benign and respectable the root has become).

. . .

A brief history of sci-fi films -- a very brief history.

Georges Melies’ 1898 short A Trip to The Moon is one of the earliest examples of the genre, and it arrived full blown at the dawn of cinema via its literary predecessors in Verne and Wells.

There were a lot of bona fide sci-fi films before WWII -- the Danes made a surprisingly large number in the silent era, Fritz Lang gave us Metropolis and Frau Im Mond, we saw the goofiness of Just Imagine and the spectacle of Things To Come and the space opera appeal of Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers.

And that’s not counting hundreds of other productions -- comedies and contemporary thrillers and westerns -- where a super-science mcguffin played a key part.

That came to a screeching halt in WWII primarily due to budget considerations and real world science easily overtaking screen fantasy. Still, there were a few bona fide sci-fi films and serials during the war and immediately thereafter, but it wasn’t until the flying saucer scare of the late forties that sci-fi became a popular movie genre again (and on TV as well).

Ground zero for 1950s sci-fi was George Pal’s Destination Moon, which was an attempt to show a plausible flight to the moon (it was actually beaten to the screens by a couple of other low budget movies that rushed into production to catch Pal’s PR wave for his film).

This led to the first 1950s sci-fi boom that lasted from 1949 to 1954, followed by a brief fallow period, then a larger but far less innovative second boom in the late 1950s to early 1960s.

BTW, let me heartily recommend the late Bill Warren’s magnificent overview of sci-fi films of that era, Keep Watching The Skies, a must have in any sci-fi film fan’s library.

Seriously, go get it.

Bill and I frequently discussed films of that and subsequent eras, and Bill agreed with my assessment of the difference between 1950s sci-fi and 1960s sci-fi: 1950s sci-fi most typically ends with the old order restored, while 1960s sci-fi typically ends with the realization things have changed irrevocably.

In other words, “What now, puny human?”

I judge the 1960s sci-fi boom to have started in 1963 (at least for the US and western Europe; behind the Iron Curtain they were already ahead of us) with the Outer Limits TV show, followed in 1964 by the films The Last Man On Earth (based on Richard Matheson’s I Am Legend), Robinson Crusoe On Mars, and The Time Travelers.

But what really triggered the 1960s sci-fi boom was Planet Of The Apes and 2001: A Space Odyssey. The former was shopped around every major Hollywood studio starting in 1963 until it finally found a home at 20th Century Fox (whose market research indicated there was an audience for well-made serious sci-fi film and hence put Fantastic Voyage into production). Kubrick, fresh off Lolita and Dr. Srangelove (another sci-fi film tho not presented as such), carried an enormous cache in Hollywood of that era, and if MGM was going to bankroll his big budget space movie, hey, maybe there was something to this genre after all.

From 1965 forward, the cinematic space race was on, with 1968 being a banner year for groundbreaking sci-fi movies: 2001: A Space Odyssey, Barbarella, Charly, Planet Of The Apes, The Power, Project X, and Wild In The Streets. (Star Trek premiering on TV in 1967 didn’t hurt, either.)

And, yeah, there were a number of duds and more than a few old school throwbacks during this era, but the point is the most interesting films were the most innovative ones.

Here’s a partial list of the most innovative sci-fi films from 1969 to 1977, nine-year period with some of the most original ideas ever presented in sci-fi films. Not all of these were box office successes, but damn, they got people’s attention in both the film making and sci-fi fandom communities.

=1969=

The Bed Sitting Room

Doppelganger (US title: Journey To The Far Side Of The Sun)

The Gladiators

The Monitors

Stereo

=1970=

Beneath The Planet Of The Apes [a]

Colossus: The Forbin Project

Crimes Of The Future

Gas-s-s-s

The Mind Of Mr. Soames

No Blade Of Grass

=1971=

The Andromeda Strain

A Clockwork Orange

Glen And Randa

The Hellstrom Chronicle

THX 1138

=1972=

Silent Running

Slaughterhouse Five

Solaris [b]

Z.P.G.

=1973=

Day Of The Dolphin

Fantastic Planet

The Final Programme (US title: The Last Days Of Man On Earth)

Idaho Transfer

=1974=

Dark Star

Phase IV

Space Is The Place

Zardoz

=1975=

A Boy And His Dog

Black Moon

Death Race 2000

Rollerball

Shivers (a.k.a. They Came From Within and The Parasite Murders) [c]

The Stepford Wives

=1976=

God Told Me To [a.k.a. Demon]

The Man Who Fell To Earth

=1977=

Wizards

[a] I include Beneath The Planet Of The Apes because it is the single most nihilistic major studio film released, a movie that posits Charlton Heston blowing up the entire planet is A Damn Good Idea; follow up films in the series took a far more conventional approach to the material. While successful, neither the studio nor mainstream audiences knew what to make of this film, so 20th Century Fox re-released it in a double bill with another problematic production, Russ Meyer’s Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls, and holy cow, if ever there was a more bugfuck double feature from a major studio I challenge you to name it.

[b] Other than Karel Zemen’s delightful animated films, Iron Curtain sci-fi films rarely screened in the US, with the exception of special effects stock shots strip mined to add production values to cheapjack American productions (looking at you, Roger Corman). Solaris is the exception.

[c] David Cronenberg made several other films in this time frame, but most of them were variations on the themes he used in Shivers, including his big break out, Scanners. Realizing he was repeating himself, Cronenberg reevaluated his goals and started making films with greater variety of theme and subject matter.

. . .

The astute reader will notice I bring my list to an end in 1977, a mere nine-year span instead of a full decade.

That’s because 1977 also saw the release of Close Encounters Of The Third Kind and Star Wars.

The effect was immediate, with knock-off films being released the same year.

1978 saw Dawn Of The Dead, a sequel to 1968’s Night Of The Living Dead, and Superman, the first non-campy superhero movie aimed at non-juvenile audiences.

1979 gave us Alien, Mad Max, and Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

These films were not just successful, they were blockbusters.

And none of them were original.

Close Encounters served as an excuse to do a Kubrick-style light show; plot and theme are about as deep as a Dixie cup, and of all the blockbusters of that era, it’s the one with no legs.

Alien’s pedigree can be traced back to It! Terror From Beyond Space (and It’s pedigree goes back to A.E. van Vogt’s “Black Destroyer” and “Discord In Scarlet” in the old Astounding Stories) and Demon Planet (US title: Planet Of The Vampires) by way of Dark Star (Dan O’Bannon writing the original screenplays for that film and Alien as well).

Mad Max, like 1981’s Escape From New York, differs from earlier post-apocalypse movies only insofar as their apocalypses of a social / cultural / political nature, not nuclear or biological weapons. Mad Max, in fact, can trace its lineage back to No Blade Of Grass, which featured it own caravan of refugees attacked by modern day visigoths on motorcycles, and the original Death Race 2000, as well as an odd little Australian non-sci-fi film, The Cars That Ate Paris.

Not only was Dawn Of The Dead a sequel, but it kickstarted a worldwide tsunami of zombie movies that continues to this day (no surprise as zombie films are easy to produce compared to other films listed here, and while there are a few big budget examples of the genre, the typical zombie movie is just actors in ragged clothes and crappy make-up).

Superman was…well…Superman. And Star Trek was Star Trek.

And the granddaddy of them all, Star Wars, was a cinematic throwback that threw so far back it made the old seem new again.

Not begrudging any of those films their success: They were well made and entertaining.

But while there had been plenty of sequels and remakes and plain ol’ knockoffs of successful sci-fi movies in the past, after these seven there was precious little room for anything really different or innovative.

1982’s E.T. was Spielberg’s unofficial follow-up to Close Encounters.

1984’s Terminator consciously harkened back to Harlan Elison’s Outer Limits episodes “Demon With A Glass Hand” and “Soldier” (not to mention 1966’s Cyborg 2087 which looks like a first draft of Cameron’s film)

All innovative movies are risky, and the mammoth success of the films cited above did little to encourage new ideas in sci-fi films but rather attempts to shoehorn material into one of several pre-existing genres.

Star Wars = space opera of the splashy Flash Gordon variety

Star Trek = crew on a mission (Star Trek: The Next Generation [+ 5 other series], Andromeda, Battlestar: Galactica [4 series], Buck Rogers In The 25th Century, Farscape, Firefly [+ movie], The Orville, Space Academy, Space Rangers, Space: Above And Beyond, plus more anime and syndicated shows than you can shake a stick at)

Superman = superheroes (nuff’ sed!)

Close Encounters / E.T. = cute aliens

Alien = not-so-cute aliens

Terminator = robots vs humans (and, yes, The Matrix movies fall into this category)

Escape From New York = urban post-apocalypse

Mad Max = vehicular post-apocalypse

Dawn Of The Dead = zombies

Mix and match ‘em and you’ve got a nearly limitless number of variations you know are based on proven popular concepts, none of that risky original stuff.

Small wonder that despite the huge number of new sci-fi films and programs available, little of it is memorable.

. . .

It shouldn’t be like this.

With ultra-cheap film making tools (there are theatrically released films shot on iPhones so there’s literally no barrier to entry) and copious venues for ultra-low / no-budget film makers to show their work (YouTube, Vimeo, Amazon Prime, etc.), there’s no excuse for there not to be a near limitless number of innovative films in all genres.

But there isn’t.

I watch a lot of independent features and short films on various channels and streaming services.

They’re either direct knock-offs of current big budget blockbusters (because often the film makers are hoping to impress the big studios into giving them lots of money to make one of their movies), or worse still, deliberately “bad” imitations of 1950s B-movies (and I get why there’s an appeal to do a bad version of a B-movie; if you screw up you can always say you did it deliberately).

Look, I understand the appeal of fan fic, written or filmed.

And I get it that sometimes it’s easier to do a knock-off where the conventions of the genre help with the final execution.

But let’s not make deliberate crap, okay?

Oscar Wilde is quoted as saying “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” but he was quoting somebody else, and that wasn’t the whole original quote.

Wilde was quoting Charles Caleb Colton, a dissolute English clergyman with a passion for gambling and a talent for bon mots.

Colton’s full quote: “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.”

Don’t be mediocre.

Be great.

#science fiction #sci-fi #1960s #1970s #movies #Bill Warren #Keep Watching The Skies

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gotatext · 5 years

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PREFERRED NAME — nora. i think i started going by it in like, 2009?? my full name is eleanor but i hated it n thought it was way too pretentious n i never felt like it fitted me so when i started writing on forums i decided i’d be a nora rather than eleanor and then my school friends called me it and it just kinda stuck, the only person who calls me eleanor is my mum

PRONOUNS — she / her / ethereal being beyond comprehension

AGE — 23 but i tell everyone im 21 because even tho time is literally fake im desperately clinging to that fleeting thing we call youth trying to catch it like smoke in my hands

PINTEREST — i actually have two. this one is my main one where i just cram all my shit n i’ve had it for years and some of its super unorganised. then i also have this one which is one i made for exclusively female characters. it started as mythological figures but now its like, women in literature and the occasional oc as well. variety is the spice of life!

DISCORD — lindsay lohan’s meth#8664

TUMBLR (PERSONAL/MUSE/RPH) — i used to be froseths but now im pvrscphones cos ya gal is a fucking whore for mythology

OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE — oi oi guvna ere’s me twitta. also here’s my letterboxd n my goodreads if anyone still uses tht

MYER-BRIGGS — enfp / infp border .... the classic profile of a lit student

HP HOUSE — hufflepuff, am fuckin mad.

ZODIAC — libra which is a joke because i am in no way balanced but i guess i AM indecisive and a peacekeeper so?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY? — i believe it when it says good shits gonna happen in my life and blame it if bad shit happens but i don’t strongly follow it i just find it interesting

HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU STARTED RPING ON TUMBLR — maybe like 14?? my first rp blog here is literally so embarassing i wrote as clove from the hunger games n my best friend irl wrote cato :/ it was wild

WHAT YEAR WAS IT? — like 9 years ago?? 2010 maybs

NAME A RANDOM ROLEPLAY THAT STICKS OUT IN YOUR MEMORY — me n my friend ellie made this really cool group the summer before we left for uni which was loosely based on a concept mentioned mayb once in the divergent series, but it gave us loads of freedom to make it our own thing. it was called the fringe n it was like..... this dystopian society where people with different genes were cut off from the rest of society n lived in overrun slum cities where different groups had like, a monopoly over weapons, produce, etc.... my character jack was the leader of this lost-boy-esque tribe called the wolf pack who were hunters n used to run across the rooftops wearing the skins of animals they’d killed and engage in tribal rituals with sacrifices to the gods n shit. sounds lame but everyone there was so invested in their character arcs that it was a shame to see it go. but ! it kind of reached its end point so we blew it up w nukes n they all died. tragic.

WHAT WEIRD ANIMAL WOULD YOU HAVE AS A PET IF IT WAS REALISTIC — a fox?? do ppl keep foxes? idk i’ve always just felt a sense of connection w them like when a fox stares at me im like this shit is life i am living and breathing in this bitch.... visceral

NAME THE FIRST SONG ON YOUR DISCOVER WEEKLY ON SPOTIFY OR THE FIRST SONG THAT COMES ON APPLE MUSIC / ITUNES SHUFFLE — everbody party tonight by cobra man n summer girl by haim..... not my usual stuff but big summer chillin vibes,.....

NAME A BOOK THAT YOU READ IN SCHOOL THAT YOU SURPRISINGLY LIKED — lord of the flies and also the handmaid’s tale. one of assignments was to write a chapter from another character’s perspective n i chose moira

NAME A BOOK YOU HATED THAT MOST PEOPLE LIKED — skellig. fuck off with ur asprin ugly bat man i don’t care. also of mice and men. don’t care about the rabbits or curley’s goddamn wife.

WHAT TV SHOW DID YOU RECENTLY BINGE? — im not a big binger bc i find it jst makes me depressed if i watch tv all day but im nearly finished stranger things season 3 n i recently finished euphoria (big rec but proceed w caution as quite triggering content)

FAVOURITE QUOTE — cool girl speech from gone girl. but also “there’s something dangerous about the boredom of teenage girls” i know its like.... such an overused quote but it really encapsulates this kind of feral girlhood that a few of my characters like bridget n greta have tapped into. i also loved the line “i feel like i could eat the world raw” from song of achilles, that really captures this kind of.... pure n childlike enthusiasm tht i wanna achieve w rory

LINK TO A VINE THAT EXUDES YOUR ‘ENERGY’ — this is my energy completely am always covered in glitter n staring broodily out of the windows of ubers at 4am like im in the sad bit of an indie film

DO YOU WRITE OUTSIDE OF RP? WHAT DO YOU WRITE? — uhh.... not as much as i shd.... i want to be a writer so i shd be makin some effort to get my stuff Out Into The World but im just not.... lol. ive done a lot of poetry collections . i wnt to finish a novel @ some point too.

THREE YOUTUBERS YOU STILL TRUST — bold of you to assume i trust any youtubers

A CELEBRITY CRUSH THAT JUST WON’T QUIT — id literally die for saoirse ronan n timothee chalamet :/ chance perdomo also owns my ass.

EVER MEET A CELEBRITY? SHARE YOUR STORY — i once high-fived dani harmer, the actress who played tracy beaker. today my sister text me tryin to make me guess what celebrity she just saw on holiday in wales and for ages she let me think it was timmothee but it was actually bradley walsh from the chase :/

WHAT’S YOUR PICTURE-PERFECT NIGHT? — i am in a bomb ass crop top and mini skirt, several scrunchies in my hair, glitter all over my face, wearing cowboy boots. we eat dinner in a trendy but affordable pub that doubles up as a cocktail bar n then we drink zombies or sex on the beaches n go to a rave where everyone is on the same wavelength n i share drugs with girls in the toilets and we swap numbers knowing we will never text each other but its ok bc in that moment we feel like we are soulmates and everyone is super drunk n touching everyone else n its all very visceral and we walk through the woods when the rave ends and lie in the grass because we wish to suck out all the marrow of life

A CONSPIRACY THEORY YOU KINDA BELIEVE IN — princess diana was murdered

ARE ALIENS REAL? — maybe the real aliens are the friends we made along the way

PLAY ANY PHONE GAMES? WHICH ONES? — love island game im addicted and way too invested in my fictional relationship with bobby, a cartoon

WHAT’S A FILM YOU LOVED WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG AND RECENTLY WATCHED, ONLY TO FIND OUT YOU DON’T ANYMORE — bold of u to assume i remember my childhood. but if we’re talking last 10 years angust, thongs n perfect snogging is so so cringe

DO YOU COLLECT ANYTHING? — pairs of glasses belonging to other ppl when they break / get new ones even though i can see perfectly well.

WHAT’S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BUT YOU’RE TOO LAZY? — mythology...... always a craving and a wish i’d read like ancient texts but my school wasn’t good enough to do greek or latin or any of that shit n even tho i could read english translations i cant be bothered. also criminal psychology

THREE LANGUAGES YOU DON’T SPEAK, BUT WISH YOU COULD — italian, french and latin

MOVIE YOU’VE WATCHED MORE THAN 5 TIMES — ladybird, about time, angus thongs, shrek 2, what we do in the shadows, the history boys, atonement, coraline, the breakfast club, ferris bueller’s day off

NAME A FICTIONAL CHARACTER FROM TV/FILM/MOVIE/GAME/BOOK THAT YOU FIND YOURSELF PROJECTING ON / YOU RELATE TO — cecilia lisbon. rue in euphoria. alison brie in glow. adam parrish in the raven cycle. richard papen. olivia cooke’s character in thoroughbreds. allen ginsberg in kill your darlings. lily in sex education. holliday grainger’s character in the film animals --- i too am an aspiring writer who never writes and just gets drunk instead .

DO YOU FOLLOW ANY SPORTS? WHO DO YOU ROOT FOR? — no. cba

HOBBIES BESIDES WASTING AWAY HERE? — i go to the movies basically every day bcos i work in a cinema. im also a voracious reader n i occasionally do theatre or costume making

PLUG A TV SHOW / MOVIE / BOOK / VIDEO GAME / ETC… YOU WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD CHECK OUT — where the wild things are (film by spike jonze). animals. beats. the book fen by daisy johnson and a girl is a half formed thing by eimar mcbride. andy warhol’s biography from a to b and back again

WHOSE BRAIN WOULD YOU LIKE TO PICK, ALIVE OR DEAD? — phoebe waller-bridge on how i get her life. carey mulligan on how she got to be such a good actress n how i can become her. maybs wes anderson. maybs gillian flynn. i tend to listen to podcasts w the ppl i really wanna pick the brains of.

TEAM EDWARD OR JACOB? — edward :/

LAST MOVIE SEEN IN THEATRE — blinded by the light n i lovd it

DO YOU STILL READ? — when i finished uni i kinda got out of the habit but this week i finished two books so ive set myself the challenge of a book a week.

IF SO, WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? — i finished song of achilles yesterday n i also finished call me by your name yesterday. started circe by madeline miller today, im also partway through milkman by anna burns and the plays of annie barker

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DID YOU HATE FILLING THIS OUT? – 3 i didnt hate it bcos at heart i am self-indulgent and love fashioning some sense of self when i feel lost in a world that is scary and constantly changing

#wshedtask002

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evenstevensranked · 6 years

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#5: Season 3, Episode 1 - “The Kiss”

Season 3 begins with a bang -- bringing us one of the best, most memorable episodes the show has ever produced! Louis and Tawny accidentally kiss at lunch and the two decide to start dating!!! AHHHH! Everything's great until Tawny has to kiss Zack Estrada (yes, the saga continues once again) in the school play. The subplot is all about Donnie, who feels like a broken human because he never cries.

This is it, guys. The Top 5. The home stretch. The crème de la crème. Let’s go.

This episode was a really big moment in my childhood. I was going through some old VHS tapes I found not too long ago, and came across one with this episode on it! That’s how you know it was a major deal. The first minute or so was cut off on the recording, and this was before all of our TVs had in-depth guides at our fingertips -- so I had no idea what episode was going to be airing. All I knew was “Even Stevens is up next!” So as soon as I saw it was the kiss episode, I popped in that tape and recorded this thing ASAP. I was a tweenage hopeless romantic with a crush on Shia LaBeouf. Of course I had to record the episode where Louis gets a girlfriend.

It opens with Louis and Tawny at lunch together being adorable, trading snacks and sides until each of their lunches are completely different from what they started with. When suddenly, Tawny ~gets something in her eye.~ The oldest cliché in the book! I love it. Louis gets reaaal close to Tawny and goes diggin’ for gold in her eye, eventually identifying the “thing” as a soy cookie crumb. That’s when some person bumps into Louis and thankfully Tawny’s lips are there to break his fall.

The two are in absolute stunned silence once they break apart. It was a magical moment, clearly, as you can see. Ren interrupts their mutual daze by walking over with Zack Estrada and Tom in tow, reminding Tawny that she has a fitting for the school play. This does a hard cut to Louis’ room after school that day. Twitty dramatically spits out his drink when he hears the news: “DUDE! THIS IS HUGE YOU KISSED TAWNY?!?!”

I’ve mentioned before that Even Stevens comes across as more of a ~bro show~ in comparison to the majority of Disney Channel shows which typically follow a teen girl as the lead. This is why I love rare moments like this scene between Louis and Twitty. Two guy best friends freaking out about one of them kissing a girl for the first time. I feel like we never see this on Disney Channel anymore. It feels so real and genuine too, especially for these characters. Louis isn’t entirely sure if it counts as a kiss though, so Twitty demands to get the facts straight. (“Kissing is like basketball, either the ball went in the hoop or it didn’t!”) He asks Louis how long he kissed her for and Louis guesses it was a “one-Mississippi” length. Twitty rejoices.

“SWISH, DUDE! You kissed her!”

Louis is elated. Both of them agree that Louis + Tawny = Beautiful. (Can’t argue there!) So much so, that Louis starts to skip around with happiness. One of my favorite parts of the whole episode is here, when Louis takes a moment to think about how Tawny might be feeling. He has a mental breakdown when he realizes “Wait, whoa. There she was... Eating her lunch... and I, like... JUMPED on her! For all I know, Tawny’s disgusted by me!” Louis Stevens is the kind of guy we all deserve. I know it’s such a small thing, but it’s something that has aged amazingly. This line stood out like a sore thumb to me given today’s political climate and the Me Too era. I’ve said a million times that this show has aged super gracefully because it really has. It’s not entirely perfect though. No show is without its blemishes. There are some things we haven’t made it to yet in the countdown that have definitely not aged very well, but we’ll get to that later. Let’s just say, this one little line shows that Louis has grown exponentially as not only a character, but a guy in general, and sets a good example. Twitty vows to go on a “fact-finding mission” for Louis to figure out how Tawny feels about the situation.

Tawny is still back at school rehearsing for the play which was written by... you guessed it! REN STEVENS! This woman does everything. How does anyone else even have a job at LJH? Ren is in charge of everything ever. Ren’s brilliant and totally not boring play is about Abigail Adams, played by Tawny, and her relationship with John Adams, played by none other than Zack Estrada! Knowing these characters and their history, it’s clear that Zack is still into Tawny to some degree. Coach Tugnut is there because they apparently pay him $92 to be the theater advisor. I love how specific that amount is, lol. He has no problem telling Ren that her play is a pile of trash and needs to be spiced up if she wants to sell any tickets.

I love how Tom is playing the “lowly manservant.” He’s ridiculously dedicated to staying in character at all times throughout the episode. Tom’s the best. Tawny’s pattern mixing though. A plaid dress with red and black striped tights and Docs? She was so ~alternative.~ I love it.

Zack is trying to ask Tawny out for a root beer when Twitty crashes the rehearsal and not so subtly tries to ask Tawny about the kiss, skirting around the issue by nervously asking stupid questions instead like “where are your parents from originally?” But of course, Tawny is freaking awesome and has no time for anyone's bs as usual. She literally says “I’m gonna stop you. Because eventually, you’re going to ask me about the kiss Louis gave me today at lunch. If he wants to talk to me about it, he can talk to me without your help. Tell him to meet me at his locker 10 minutes before first period,” YAAAASSSSSS! TAWNY IS NO NONSENSE AND ONE OF THE GREATEST FEMALE CHARACTERS ON DISNEY. Praise.

The next morning Louis is waiting for Tawny at his locker and you’ve undoubtedly seen this screenshot of when he notices her walking his way:

Smooth. For whatever reason this is one of the main images that comes up as a “Louis Stevens” search result, therefore nearly every single nostalgia article uses it. It’s kind of annoying.

Louis and Tawny have a preciously awkward conversation, talking about how they both couldn’t sleep because they were up thinking about what happened. They’re also sort of skirting around the issue until Tawny puts her foot down once again: “Look, Louis, I like you. I always have. Since the first day I met you.” I am melting. Louis is so freaking happy and says “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?! WE COULD’A BEEN KISSIN’ UP A STORM!!!” Oh, wow. They immediately start dating and I’m a puddle of goo. Also, this happens. Which... yeah, lol. 95k notes. Wow.

The first gif tho. Louis when Tawny was saying “I like you.” HOW GENUINE IS THAT FACE?! Shia won an Emmy for this so there is justice in the world. But yeah. They are so pure. :’)

This leads into a montage that spans possibly 3 days or so, showing us Louis and Tawny interacting as a couple. I hate that this is all we get. They should’ve stretched this montage into 3 episodes instead tbh. I live for this crap.

“Hey, babe. Want some celery?”

“Only 15 more hours ‘til I see you!”

"Thanks for walking me to rehearsal.” “Oh, anything for my beautiful lady.”

QUALITY CONTENT. Also, gotta love how polite Louis is being by wearing that hideous sweater Tawny knit for him.

I love this episode because we get to see actual ~Boyfriend Louis~ for the first and pretty much only time, and man is it something. Once again this show nails the awkwardness of Junior High relationships. It’s so intense when you’re 14, right?! There’s no such thing as casually dating. You have to be all in, 24/7. It takes over your life because you’re not really equipped to mentally handle a serious relationship at 14. This is why I never get tired of watching TV teen relationships. They’re always endlessly entertaining to me.

After watching a cheesy 1940s “Casablanca” knock-off romance movie with the fam, Ren realizes the “spice” her play needs is the passion of two people in love. She rewrites the play to make it more exciting and even adds in a passionate kiss between Abigail and John... a.k.a. Zack and Tawny... for the big finale. UH-OH! We’re introduced to Donnie’s little subplot there because Steve, Eileen, and even Beans -- bawled their eyes out at the movie but all Donnie could do was burp after stuffing his face through the whole thing. He starts to question “what’s wrong with me?!” because he felt no emotion whatsoever.

Ren announces the script changes at the rehearsal Louis walked Tawny to a few screenshots above. Coach Tugnut observes Louis and Tawny’s obvious couple-y vibe and tells Louis “First girlfriend? Get ready for a lifetime of pain.” Oh, god. That’s the last thing you should tell Louis Stevens. He starts freaking out and it only gets worse when he hears Ren tell everyone about the addition of the big kiss and Zack cheers “YEEEEEAHHHH!!!!!! *transitions into a cough to cover his excitement*” Because as I mentioned, it’s clear that he’s still into Tawny. I feel like if it was anyone other than Zack, Louis might be okay with the kiss. There’s just something about this guy that he absolutely cannot deal with. We first saw Louis' jealousy over Zack and Tawny way back in Season 1 with "Easy Way" and then "Strictly Ballroom." We also see Louis become super jealous over Twitty's friendship with Zack towards the end of the series. Also... I swear, I did not plan for 3 out of 4 episodes in The Zack Estrada Saga to end up in the Top 10 and be counted down in serial order. Pretty cool that it worked out that way though, haha.

Louis feels that Ren’s rewrite is “too predictable” so he decides to write his own ending for the play and presents it to Ren at home that night. He envisions the story concluding with Abigail running to her husband and giving him a haircut. HAHAHA! Anything but a kiss! “I’ve never seen it before!” he says. Welp, he’s definitely right about his idea being unpredictable! lol. Imagine?! Of course, Ren can tell that Louis is actually just freaking out about Zack kissing Tawny and Louis is like “Are you trying to embarrass me in front of the whole school?!” -- But, would it really be that bad though? Would people taunt him like “lol ur girlfriend kissed another guy” or something? Because, like... It’s just a play. But then again, it is middle school. So.

Louis is super down about the whole thing and Tawny finds him sulking on a bench the next day. She’s all “Hey, Cutie Pants! I’ve been looking all over for you!” -- ‘Cutie Pants’ is a little too far, lol. She brought Louis her “Tater Slabs,” which he declines. Side note: Are those supposed to be a form of Tater Tots? Because I feel like Disney Channel has a million different names for Tater Tots. They call them Tater Slabs here. These days, they’re calling them Baby Taters on Andi Mack. It’s just a constant reminder that “Tater Tots” is a registered trademark that Disney can’t say without coughing up the cash, lol.

Tawny asks Louis if something’s the matter and he’s like “I think you should quit the play” and pulls a bunch of bogus excuses out of his butt as for why. Tawny being Tawny cuts right to the chase: “Does this have anything to do with me kissing Zack?” I love this bit. She reassures him that all they’re doing is acting, it’s not real -- and there’s only one person she really wants to kiss. She asks Louis to promise he’ll be okay with it and Louis’ response of “Alright. I promise,” is the softest, most sincere thing I’ve ever heard this character say. It warms my heart every time. Tawny heads off to rehearsal and Louis is feeling prett-ay swaggy knowing he’s ~the only man in Tawny’s life~

I CAN’T DEAL WITH THIS. I also never knew what he was saying here, but I think I just realized he’s mouthing to himself “I’m the only one she really wants to kiss”

Louis was just accepting the fact that it’s ONLY ACTING until he sees the newly unveiled poster for the play that features a cozy picture from dress rehearsal.

CUT TO THE PLAY! It starts with a bit where Tawny/Abigail calls Tom’s character Renee “a loyal and faithful manservant.” Tom originally had a speech, but Ren cut it in her rewrite. So he milks his time on stage by saying “Thank you, thank you, thank you” repeatedly to Abigail. It’s great. Tawny and Zack are up there acting really well together! Louis’ whole family is whispering about how great their chemistry is and Louis is quaking.

One of John’s lines in the play is that he will think of Abigail “on two occasions... when my eyes are open, and when they are closed,” -- Is that a Babyface reference?! HAHA. Louis can’t take it anymore so he goes running backstage and I’m not sure what he was planning to do, but he ends up going completely insane. He somehow managed to steal Tom’s costume right off his back and goes running on stage demanding for John to leave before kissing his wife goodbye. It’s so cringeworthy. I can’t help but laugh though when Louis says “You must come with me at once! You gotta send her a postcard, email, or something! We gotta miss rush-hour traffic!” LOL.

Ren: “How did Louis get your clothes?!”

Tom: “He can be very persuasive...”

What could Louis possibly have said to get Tom to strip?! Omg.

Tom goes running on stage like ^ that in an attempt to save the play somehow and says “Excuse the undergarments, m’lady! I was under the cherry tree napping!” which was always one of my mom’s favorite lines, haha. Tom tries to drag Louis off stage but the entire play officially goes down in flames when Louis starts fighting Tom off of him. He goes rollin’ all over the stage, knocking down everything in his path -- completely ruining the set. It’s funny, but I also feel so bad for Tawny. Ugh.

After Louis destroys the whole shebang, he tries to play it off by doing this... which is truly hilarious:

Louis meets up with Tawny outside after the play and the two have such a dramatic conversation. I love it. Louis apologizes: “You gotta understand... I tried to be mature and cool. And the next thing I know, I’m up on stage wearing Tom’s pants! I’m really sorry.” It’s way more sincere than it sounds. Louis decides that he’s not ready for a relationship. This is actually such great character development for him. Interestingly, he’s mature enough to realize he’s NOT mature enough to seriously date someone. As upsetting and frustrating as it is to see the two break up, it’s also really satisfying to see him own up to his immaturity. This creates a true arc for when they finally get together in the series finale. It feels earned. Like they’re actually ready that time around. They decide to go back to being just friends for the time being. Before they part ways, however, Louis decides to leave Tawny with a super suave kiss?! What the heck?!

This was the biggest kiss of my entire childhood between two TV characters aside from Lizzie and Gordo at the end of The Lizzie McGuire Movie tbh. Everyone was expecting that Lizzie/Gordo kiss though. THIS one was outta left field here! This is so weird to me! He’s super smooth with Beans’ cousin later on and here he’s kissin’ Tawny like a pro. Idk, man.

The episode ends with Donnie finally crying over that Babyface lyric: “When his eyes are open, and when his eyes are closed......... THAT’S ALL THE TIME!”

And that’s it!

Gaaad, this episode is a classic. Like I said, it was a pretty big deal for 10 year old me, let me tell ya! I feel like it’s definitely one of the most memorable episodes ever. Not to mention, it technically has 3 plots (Louis/Tawny, Ren writing the play, and Donnie) and ALL OF THEM ARE INTERTWINED FLAWLESSLY! I gotta commend that. The only department I’d say this episode is lacking in is quotable dialogue. But that’s it really! It checks every box for me otherwise! This episode and the finale probably had a lot to do with Season 3 being my favorite as a kid, haha.

What are your thoughts on this wonderful season opener?! Please add to the conversation via Disqus belowwww!

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theoptimistbellasworld · 5 years

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When Adulting Becomes Tiring

Adulting. Quarter life crisis. Never thought that it is an official thing. I know I am going through some crisis or melancholy phase, but I thought I am just overreacting to the change of season in my life.

Millennials like me have experienced an awesome childhood. Life back then was comfortable and simple. Like what I also saw on Facebook a few days ago, they described it as waking up in the morning with our breakfast ready, school uniform already ironed, warm water for our bath, and TV on for the morning news. That, for me, was a stress-free life. No social media. No notifications to check. No worries about whether your message was read, or even seen. No fear of missing out. All you need to worry about is finishing your homework or reviewing enough for the day’s long quiz.

Once school is done, we are in a hurry to go home because we don’t want to miss our favorite afternoon cartoon series. After the leisure of television, just do some of the homework then go out and play outside with friends and cousins. Volleyball, langit lupa, text, pogs, jolen, chinese garter, agawang base, patintero, tumbang preso, luksong baka and more kalye games. We get to play and pick a fight with the kids from the other street, and get to meet new playmates and friends. Real life friends. Our only screen time would be playing the brick game or Super Mario on the family computer. Our favorite past time is to hang out at dusk, with a guitar, playing and singing the songs of our favorite bands: Eraserheads, Parokya ni Edgar, Spongecola, Callalily, Rivermaya, Kamikazee, Silent Sanctuary, MYMP, 6cyclemind, Moonstar88, Hale, Paramore, FM Static, The Red Jump Suit Apparatus, Life House, Boys Like Girls, My Chemical Romance, Goo Goo Dolls, and the list goes ooonnn! (I know you have a lot of bands in your mind, but these are just my favorites. And yah, this is my jam back then. LOL. And friendships are strengthened because of this jam! Haha)

Now we are getting nostalgic huh? But my point is, life, when we were teens, was fine and easy. The words I used a while ago were comfortable, simple, and stress-free. What happened now? Have you felt the transition? Have you noticed that you became fully aware of life and society’s issues? Do the burden and responsibilities seem too much for you now? Same besh. Same. And I realized it is not just because we age, but also because we mature, and times are changing fast. This current generation is so different from ours that causes our transition to be overwhelming.

I read an article from Grace Communion International that explains what is happening. Tho it talks about midlife crisis, I'm pretty sure we can get something from it:

The midlife years have always been a time of reflection. With one’s life supposedly half over, we try to reevaluate who we are and what we want to do with the rest of our lives. Factor in anxiety about growing older and comparisons to others or unattainable standards set by advertising, and it is easy to see how this period of time segued from what was once called the “midlife transition” into a “midlife crisis,” a term introduced in 1965 by psychoanalyst and social scientist Elliot Jaques. How do we cope with all of this midlife melancholy without becoming suicidal?

The roots of these feelings run deeper than emotional dissatisfaction with life. We all want to feel significant in some way—to leave a positive mark on society and those around us. When the midyears hit, we realize many of our youthful dreams will never come true. It can be deeply disappointing. Even if those dreams did come true, it can leave us unfulfilled and wanting more. We are dissatisfied. So either way, almost any path looks better than the one we’ve taken.

We have more, more, more of everything, yet feel less, less, less satisfied.

Mid-lifers search in all the wrong places to fill the void of lost youth, unrealized dreams, or discontentment. Some have an extramarital affair, get plastic surgery, buy a new convertible, or switch jobs — finding out too late that these outward appearances cannot replace the emptiness inside. Perhaps that’s when suicide looks appealing.

Society has made it easy to bail out. Just a handful of pills, an endless sleep and all feelings of inadequacy are over.

But is midlife suicide a solution or a symptom of our modern society? Society tells us we must be happy all the time. Yet society tells us ever so subtly that we will never measure up: We are not young enough, pretty enough, thin enough, rich enough or smart enough. Even religion often makes us feel that we are not good enough and that we do not do enough. This “not enough” syndrome leaves people feeling helpless and hopeless, making the void in their lives seem even bigger.

Source: https://archive.gci.org/articles/mid-life-melancholy/

One of my favorite writer, John Piper, cited an experience of a midlife meltdown in one of his articles:

There is something to men in midlife crisis. I remember one time, I was 40, sitting on the steps halfway through vacation sobbing. Noël comes down the steps. She asked, “What’s wrong?” I said, “I don’t have a clue. I don’t have a clue why I’m so sad.” And that season lasted several years, and the grace was that I could still function.

Source: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/walk-with-me-through-a-midlife-crisis?fbclid=IwAR30LDixYMPJn5X8n-wk1ZGJ2MD0728rrAQf6wGaN08I9Yee2_sjzbseDYo

So you see, this is not something that we just make up because we are too emotional with what is happening in our lives. These things really happen and you are not alone in this struggle.

I tried to enumerate what are the major things that make me worry or anxious. Now, these are just my personal struggles but have heard with friends of the same age that they worry about these things, too. Maybe as you read, you can relate and you can say we are on the same rapids. ;)

Financial Stability

We are no longer students who are just waiting for our allowance and if in case it won’t be enough, we can just ask from our parents anytime. We are professionals now. We work to earn our own money, pay our own bills and to at least give some to our parents. But as the supply increases, the demands are increasing too. Our income doesn’t seem to be enough for the things we need to pay for. And worst, we can’t save for a house and a car, or just even maintain a savings account. We declare that we are financially unstable.

Dreams

“This is not where I am meant to be.”

“I should be this or that.”

“I want to be like him/her”

We have dreams that seem to be impossible to happen or out of our reach. And because of the rejections and disappointments we have experienced, we ended up burying those dreams in the deepest of our hearts.

Settling Down

Settling down is an unspecific way of indicating you have found a life partner and stopped dating or jumping from one relationship to another. But the problem with this generation is, people can’t be contented with the one they are already with. And this is so heartbreaking.

I have heard and seen relationships falling apart only because the other person got interested with someone else and chose to dump the current relationship for a new one. This creates fear or trust issues for some people. Thus, dreaming of settling down becomes the least priority.

Some don’t want to settle down because they think they are not yet ready. They think they are not yet financially and emotionally capable. But we can’t pretend that we do not want it and we do not worry about it. Deep inside we all want to build our own family and go home with the person that will be our “constant” and “forever”. Especially if we are already on our ideal marrying age.

Talents/ Hobbies

I am not sure if I am the only one who gets anxious about this, but do you have a talent or hobby that you really love doing yet because of work and other responsibilities in life, you no longer have the luxury of time to do it? Then when you see someone excellent on that thing, you can’t help but be jealous and wish you can still do it too.

I wrote about these things because I want you to know that you are not alone in this journey. You don’t have to go through it and figure things out all by yourself. Thank God because these things are just for a season. And we can learn a lot from it. That I will share on my next blog. ;)

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latestnews2018-blog · 6 years

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The Cathartic Power Of Maeve In Season 2 Of 'Westworld'

New Post has been published on https://latestnews2018.com/the-cathartic-power-of-maeve-in-season-2-of-westworld/

The Cathartic Power Of Maeve In Season 2 Of 'Westworld'

Warning: Spoilers ahead!

There’s this one, glorious shot of Maeve in the Season 2 finale of “Westworld.” She stands, defiant, using her code-controlling powers to freeze an entire horde of crazed hosts to protect the Door, a kind of pathway to salvation for the Ghost Nation and their followers. It’s brilliant on many levels, foremost because it’s the instant where the show fully crystalizes something that, all season, it had only been half-committed to acknowledging: Maeve is the moral center of the show, and its most interesting character.

Maeve is good, and indeed good characters, especially on a show like “Westworld,” can be boring, skewing dangerously into the territory of the Mary Sue. But there are layers to Maeve, to the way that she navigates her world, that resonate far beyond the encroaching, suffocating borders of the show.

There were moments during Season 2 of “Westworld” when I had to take a mental pause, check in with myself, ask: “Are you OK?” and, more frequently, “Why am I watching this again?”

“Westworld” is a great show in a way so many series in the age of post-prestige TV are great shows. Meaning to say, it does all the right things: It looks phenomenal; it sounds phenomenal; it does enough of what it’s supposed to, just enough to distract the viewer from the fact that sometimes, there’s a whole lot of nothing going on. Just, like, endless mazes of cryptic dialogue, old-timey instrumental renditions of “Paint It Black,” and a general aura of doing the absolute most with as little as possible.

This is no shade. The fun of “Westworld” is that no matter how many fan theories and hidden messages we try to decipher throughout the run of the show, at the end of the day, deep down, we all know “Westworld” makes no goddamn sense and will probably still make no goddamn sense even when all the answers are finally revealed to us. That’s the frustrating beauty of it all. If nothing makes sense then everything makes sense, right?

But there’s something else that kept me coming back this season, even when the incessant, numbing violence and potholed storylines made me feel like backing away. This was, of course, Maeve Millay.

HBO

There’s a kind of catharsis in watching a character like Maeve.

Because there’s a kind of catharsis in watching a character like Maeve, in watching an actress like the perennially underrated Thandie Newton. It was always there, but it became most potent, most identifiable for me and maybe for the show itself in Sunday’s finale.

Over her two-season character arc, Maeve has grown in depth and complexity, going from her narrative loop as a take-no-shit madam in one of Westworld’s old-timey saloons to a fully conscious host determined to save her daughter. Maeve has shown herself to be capable of extreme cruelty (for the sake of survival) and extreme compassion.

In one of the best episodes of Season 2, “Akane no Mai,” we watch Maeve interact with her Shogun world counterpart, sacrificing the last leg of her pursuit for her daughter to help the geisha Akane save (and avenge) her own daughter.

No, Maeve is not compelling because she is, at her core, good. She’s compelling because of the ways in which her innate goodness, despite whatever flaws she may have, brushes up against the bad in others, brings out the good in them.

It’s through Maeve that so many characters find their moral compass and their strength ― from bodyshop technician Felix, who goes from being terrified of her to dedicated to her, to Hector, a host programmed to watch out only for himself whose mission in life shifts to helping Maeve search for her daughter. Even Lee, head of narrative, a man who spends most of Season 2 bitching, moaning and avoiding bullets, literally sacrifices his own life in the final moments of the season to give Maeve, a woman he once referred to merely as a “machine” a fighting chance.

HBO

Maeve is, truly, the savior that Dolores only thinks she is.

My cynical side wants to side eye that last dramatic detail, indeed side eye the entire idea that so many characters could become so blindly loyal to Maeve and her quest, but then I think of Dolores and her bullshit, and I’m like, “I’ll allow it.”

That’s the other thing about Maeve ― the way she complements and contrasts with Dolores. These characters were introduced to us in Season 1 as subversions of the Madonna and whore archetypes. This season, they’re like twin planets, orbiting each other, in danger at any moment of veering off their axes and colliding. In the two significant moments in which we see these characters interact, Dolores tries to convince Maeve to abandon the quest for her daughter and join the crusade in destroying humanity. All Dolores sees when she looks at Maeve is the “revenge” in her, and the possibility of exploiting that revenge for her own means.

“Revenge is just a different prayer at their altar, darling,” Maeve coolly replies. “And I’m well off my knees.”

There’s significance in this exchange that echoes the overall significance in Maeve’s underlying conflict with Dolores and, indeed, in Westworld as a whole. It’s significant that Maeve speaks to Japanese, Spanish and Ghost Nation hosts in their own language, while Dolores speaks to them in English. It’s significant that Maeve has the power to control the minds of other hosts and yet, given numerous opportunities to do so, chooses not to. And it’s significant, yes, that Maeve is a black woman, using her newfound voice to fight her oppressors without forcing anyone who doesn’t fuck with her vision to literally change who they are or die.

The fact that Dolores is the antithesis of these things doesn’t necessarily make Maeve “better.” If there’s one thing “Westworld” hammers home time and time again, it’s that there are no real heroes and villains, no real white hats or black hats. But in a show that constantly questions the nature of freedom and free will, watching a black female character implicitly defy a white female character’s choice to establish freedom by literally dismantling other people’s individuality in the name of so-called “revolution” is perhaps the most significant thing of all.

why does this frame of Maeve protecting the Door look like a visual metaphor for being a black woman tho pic.twitter.com/8y0pHecwNh

— Zeba Blay (@zblay) June 25, 2018

I know a lot of people have identity-politics fatigue when it comes to discussing pop culture ― notions like “diversity” and “representation” are treated like unserious detours from hard-minded critical exegesis ― but indulge me, if you will, in discussing the concept as it relates to Maeve, as it relates to this cultural moment.

Maeve is every black woman who has had to save herself because everyone else was taking too damn long. Maeve is, truly, the savior that Dolores only thinks she is. In the end, whatever utopia Dolores is envisioning pales in comparison to the kind of utopia that Maeve, by sheer personal power, creates for herself. It’s one in which hosts and humans alike band together for the common good, risk their lives for one another, recognize the value in one another.

I know, that’s some hokey, kumbaya shit. But in a week like this week, a month like this month, a year like this year, when headlines about borders and the erosion of basic human rights keep rising to the top of the news cycle like rancid cream, the catharsis of watching that final scene in Episode 10, of watching Maeve stand at a literal border, holding off the masses of violence and rage so that a few other people can attain salvation, is, while very much on the nose, also profound, and deeply moving.

“Oh,” I thought when I first saw the scene, “Oh, that’s what all of this feels like.”

At the end of Season 2, Maeve and her cohorts lose. They die. There is, strangely, catharsis in this fact, too. Yes, she’s almost definitely coming back in season three (“You think I’m scared of death? I’ve done it a million times.”). But, like most things on “Westworld,” it isn’t really the outcomes of the neverending battles that intrigue me or keep me coming back.

It’s funny: Dolores focuses so much on Maeve’s rage and sees it as the only thing that makes her useful or important. The guests and creators of Westworld seize upon her power to overwrite other hosts’ code, to literally control their minds. They’re focusing on the wrong thing. What makes Maeve truly compelling, truly worth rooting for, is her empathy. In a real world that feels severely lacking in empathy right now, it’s her empathy that makes her so vital.

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