#i just always wonder if im a manipulative asshole

[2-kamikou-1]

praying im not the kind of person that people feel obligated to stay friends with for fear of making me upset

[ajearthlinggg]

exposing you based on your fav will wood/wwatt song (my longest post)

A lot of these have nothing to do with the song. They're basically headcannons lmao. My Blake Jennings is showing

No instrumental chnt except Rhumba sorry

i started this in June enjoy

EIAL

6up 5oh copout: its low hanging fruit to say you hate cops, and I'm taking it. You hate cops.

Skeleton Appreciation whatever the fuck: Covid RUINED you

Front Street: you like Heathers

Aikido!: how's that obsessiveness and inability to let go going?

White Knuckle Jerk: you also like nu metal for the same reason. (Its incredibly horny)

Cover This Song: same as Aikido but only with your exes omg do not text them they are assholes

Thermodynamic Lawyer: PLEASE take time to calm down when you get overstimulated I promise if you don't do anything abt it you will have such a terrible mental breakdown

Red Moon: YOU LISTEN TO MALE MANIPULATOR MUSIC STOP TRYING TO HIDE IT YOU CANT BE IN THE RADIOHEAD CLOSET FOREVER

Lysergide daydream: I honestly do not like this song at all so you get a pass (don't kill me)

The First Step: you're usually quiet but you know how to SCREAM.

Jimmy Mushroom: you're usually quiet but- I'm just kidding. You're always quiet

Chemical Overreaction: you're usually quiet but if- I'm just kidding. You are never quiet

Everything is a lot/dte: insomnia. I dont know why,but insomnia

Self-ish

self/ish: closet theatre kid

2012: fast talker to a not comprehendible level

Cotard Solution: turn off the v-sauce it is 2 am

Mr. Capgras: turn off the 🌽 it is 2 am

The Song With Five Names: you have incredible taste. You can't describe that taste, but hey, its incredible

Hand me my shovel: you were the only talented kid in your elementary music class

Dr. Sunshine is Dead: you love the smell of cigarettes

TNA

Suburbia overture: BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD

222: your English teacher loves you (you're so goddamn gay)

Laplace's Angel: your English teacher hates you. How do I know? Because you can't pronounce anything (its la-plass-es not la-place-is)

i/me/myself: you have to beat off the fake fan allegations with a stick everyday

Wbtta: hey queen. How are those hyperfixations going

Outliars and hyppocrates: you spell the title wrong every. damn. time.

bbw: same as 2012 but holy shit triple it.

Marsha, thankk you: dyslexia and ADHD

Love, me normally: I get it. I'm not even gonna expose you. You already have it bad enough

Momento Mori: you are just SO quirky! (knives whisper things to you when you hold them)

Icimi

Tomcat Disposables: you'd shove photos of your pets in your friends faces even if they were dangling off a bridge

Becoming the last names: you either have wonderful parents in a happy relationship or your parents have been divorced for years and you will never relate to this song

Cicada Days: stop using self deprecating humor around the wrong people PLEASE

Euthanasia: this song is a masterpiece I have nothing to say about you.

Falling Up: WONDERFUL TASTE. AMAZING CHOICE. NO RECOLLECTION OF YOUR CHILDHOOD.

That's enough: you love Alex g you just don't know it yet

Um its kind of a lot: you either already love Scott pilgrim or it will happen. Its a canon event

Half decade hangover: omg twinn!! I have an addictive personality, too!

(I feel like this is a good time to say don't take these too seriously)

You liked this: ...what?

The main character: you can't relate to the song, you hate yourself

Sdrr: IF I SEE ONE MORE PERSON TAKING THIS SONG SUPER SERIOUSLY IM GONNA LOSE MY SHIT YDHZJABXV

Bfb: ur just a silly lil guy

Willard!: you're a therian. There is no human explanation to this.

white noise: you love pink floyd you just don't know it yet

Atkf: HOW TF DID I FORGET THIS ONE anyways you get bad habits (nail biting, staying up too late. Etc)

CHNT

Yes to err: you are still waiting for chnt season 2 BC you want to see what happens with Adam

Your body, my temple: I have a strong feeling you have a tummy ache right now

Venetian Blind Man: you love nobody sexually you just don't know it yet (this is a very ace choice idk why)

Rhumba of Death: you LOVE Halloween

When Somebody Needs You: Tyler the Creator is probably your favorite rapper

Live

Trww

Self/ish: You can't sleep if your room has the SLIGHTEST amount of light in it

10-4 6-up: unlike the original, you don't just hate cops, you hate anybody who can tell you what to do (your teachers are probably just trying to do their job. please)

Cotards Solution: you can't sleep without background noise

Dr Sunshine Lives!: You never get sick physically (mentally on the other hand...)

Where do you get off: omg the horniest of the horny. Gerard Way on stage levels of horny. Nine Inch Nails levels of horny. (Or you really like Umbrella Academy idk why)

Aikido: you can't relate to it. You hate everybody

Take a break grab some water this is getting long

Thermodynamic Lawyer: you have gotten kicked out of restaurants because of how loud you are

Front Street: WE GET IT. IT'S BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL.

Wasting away again: I am so sorry holy shit

Hand me my (x), I'm (y): you suck at algebra

The First Step: you wish you could do the AUGHHHHHHHH

2012: severe social anxiety

Mr capgras: literally the opposite of 2012 (live)

Chemical Overreaction: you know so many random fun facts

Fibrodysplasia: I'm not even gonna talk about your mental issues because I will be banned from this app (which is pretty much impossible)

Icid

Cicada Days: you also get a pass fuck I'm so sorry

The main character okay you ACTUALLY can relate to it

Icimi: OMG I LOVE YOU

atkf: you cry every day even if you aren't sad

Becoming the last names: please don't become a Disney adult

Vampire ref: LISTEN TO MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN PUTTING IT OFF AND IK YOU LOVE HOT VAMPIRE MUSIC

Half decade hangover: oh my god talk to somebody it'll be okay I'm so sorry

Tsw5n: you love the way he says "what the fuck"

Euthanasia: once again, ANOTHER PASS. IM SO SORRY I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY

Jimmy Mushrooms: You. Me. Marriage. Now.

Laplaces Angel: you listen to LitWTC

i/me/myself: you were trying to separate yourself from the normal i/me/myself fans

The first step: idk why but you REALLY like lemonade

skeleton appreciation day: you can NOT play any instrument

tomcat disposables: you love concept albums

White noise: unlike cotards, you need to sleep in SILENCE

Love me normally: arctic monkeys. that's all I have to say. idk what about them but, yeah

misanthrapologist: GAY QUEER LGBT HOMOSEXUAL FRUITY ZESTY ROMANTICALLY ATTRACTED TO PEOPLE OF THE SAME GENDER

Falling up: wonderful taste once again please don't become a Disney adult

thats enough let's get you home: you say "YIPPIE!!" a lot

And if I did: god made you shy because he knew if you weren't you would be unstoppable

[yanxidarlings]

Aaaaaa i did not expect you to reply so soon! Love your perspective, especially the part about spain playing favourites and choosing the most catholic and most resource heavy 😭😭.. i feel like most people never really talk about former colonies and their colonisers... bc theres no way india would be that happy and pleasant with england😭😭.... anyways rant over im really into ur latin america hcs... especially mexico... 😇😇

anonymous asked:

Sorry if im spamming you but i also just had a thought... since mexico would be very similar to spain, would he be equally as delusional... or worse? I think he would start thinking hes in some telenova or hes a cowboy or something ( north america try not to be delusional challenge)(impossible)

i saw the ask and my brain went ding ding that is extremely rare round of applause for anon please do keep spamming i'm on a roll here

oo! i feel like spain is in an interesting position among colonisers and their former colonies; i'm pretty sure, or at least headcanon, that he found pretty much all of his former colonies as chibi's, kind of like china, so they probably don't have as many memories of their native cultures that were stripped from them. that's why they might not bare as intense hatred for spain as someone like vietnam would hold for france.

but there's definately alot of resentment. i think this is especially prominent for peru, who i have often seen characterised as quite in touch with his parent, Inca's, culture and history, and probably wonders what his life might have looked like if he had been allowed to grow up out of spain's iron grip.

i headcanon that latin america, spain's portion of it at least, try to make spain feel as excluded and alienated from what antonio perceives as his 'legacy' in the america's, it's a way to subtly let out some of their repressed resentment towards him.

and on india — you're definately right! i think england and india have a much more snarky? relationship. india is nearly as old as china and was trying to finesse his way through europe's colonial era only to get stuck with this entitled asshole with a superiority complex, that's gotta breed some strong resentment. india is alot like china in the way that he just tolerates those he dislikes for the sake of politics - he's not getting chummy with england unless there's something in it for him.

back to latin american colonisation — i've always characterised mexico as being one of the former spanish colonies that drinks the 'big brother spain' kool-aid. he's not so delusional about colonisation as he is not wanting to recognise how much of a monster spain really was. i can't imagine josé likes to hear or talk about the aztec empire's slaughter at spain's hands; it tears him apart that he lost his actual parent to the only parental figure he knows.

and this definately bleeds into his yandere psyche. mexico doesn't like to confront the reality that any love his darling has for him is manufactured; stockholm syndrome at best, entirely faked at worst. he doesn't like to think of himself as being manipulative or wrong because the implications of that truth are just too much for him to handle.

this is definately where he differs most strikingly from spain; fundamentally, spain isn't able to see the reality of his actions and how wrong they are or how much he's messed up his darling in the process of 'pursuing' them. it's all just a grand romance, his darling is the one with the issues.

josé is definately the type to play into whatever fantasy will best charm his darling, and try to glamourise the relationship "we would make good characters for a telenovela, cariño! we would have so many fans". he likes to compare his actions to others to justify them as well "spain had his own key for your room back in the day" and make intruding on their life seem so normal.

not to mention, piggybacking off my last post, latin america would be a cesspool of yandere's validating each others behaviours. they all picked it up from spain at somepoint, maybe even from each other, so no one bat's an eye when mexico goes on another obsession fueled rant; some countries he's closer to might even offer to help.

the fandom likes to hype up russia and belarus as scary but at least people recognise them as dangerous. latin america is equally as dangerous if not more, imagine being stuck between one, two, or more of them? at least in europe you can pit yandere's against each other, spain raised his colonies as siblings and despite their conflicts they are capable of mass cooperation.

[bitchin-tubs]

Complain time again tee hee but I’m just like UGHHHH talking genuinely to these ppl is SO hardddddd

With girl A, I spent almost a whole class lecture (friendly) debating with this one girl on why people medically diagnosed as psychopaths and sociopaths are not inherently dangerous, are not narcissistic by default and how ‘masking’ is not a form a manipulation. Her source for all of these… You. The Netflix show…

With girl B, I feel like she’s sooooo,,,, dismissive ?? Idk like I tried to introduce her to my friends once and she genuinely did not gaf. Like I said hi B this is C then she says hi to me and me only. Like my girl C is right here. But at the same time she’s always bringing me into her friend groups which is fine but I dont connect easily so most times I’m kinda just there SPECIALLY if it’s an all men group when I have specially told her I tend to be uncomfortable with men for “no” reason

I was having a conversation with girl A and the topic of autism was brought up, I told her that I think I may be low on the spectrum but there are some things I tend to relate to with autism behaviors, and considering opened up to me about her anxiety and how she had previously talked very openly abt diagnosis I thought maybe she’d get it. I know,,, self diagnosis (u are free to feel any type of way abt it) but idk I thought she’d have any type of nuanced comment about it but I should’ve known from the psychopath talk… I had told her that I find meeting new people very hard, I have difficulty talking to said people and I tend to be very restrictive about who I make a meaningful connection to. She said that my personality is and I quote “mamona” (jerk/snob/asshole ish) and completely dismissed my masking, overstimulation, 10 year old special interest, taking shit to literal and not understanding social cues or instructions as “just being different” yeah so I thought… yknow I might not have autism valid but idk I felt so ignored at that moment

Also don’t think I just unpack shit on her unannounced, we talk and convos play out as they usually do and since the topic was out I was like sometimes I wonder if I have it because of so and so plus she was unwinded with me before so it wasn’t impossible for us to talk abt personal stuff, even though we not so tight we are still close

Another thing I’m very bad at making friends, I think I mirror good enough to have nice interactions with people but not to the point they invite me to shit or talk to me outside of classes. Back when I was in my exchange program I was sharing a room with 3 swifties so I had to pretend to like Taylor swift so I wouldn’t feel singled out, I also watched the summer I turned pretty and witnessed these girls thirst over bad boy #2 when I thought the character was so shitty (the actor is good looking but I’m not attracted to him) and also would also unknowingly spend all-nighters on school nights (as in I didn’t know they were meant to be all-nighters) with them watching a movie I didn’t particularly like and see everyone thirsting over annoying man on screen (one of them was some straight outta wattpad step-sibling story ew, the other pride and prejudice IM SORRY YALL I DIDNT GET THE HYPE 😭 call me uncultured it’s okay

A and B are sólo also hardcore swifties and I can only be neutral abt her otherwise they get on my ass about it and saying I like Taylor swift or her music is too big of a lie even for me

I told girl A about this (or at least a bit) and she said that I should’ve just been me. Girl I can’t be me we were both witnessing a girl being actively bullied (tv show ass bullying they printed a picture of her and drew over it ugly, taped it to her dorm room. Still hurtful and bullying tho) I’m NOT about to ostracize myself

HOWEVERRR these are not my main friends, these are like the friends I made to not be lonely in these extra classes for an American 🦅🦅🦅 diploma. My close CLOSE friends are from my same career classes and they are so much more understanding and can interact more naturally with. So in my day to day I got good genuine friends by my side

I recognize that I can be perceiving these memories differently than how they actually happened, misinterpret their actions and just be in my feeling right now but idk I feel like I’m so difficult and constantly just have to comply with people in order to make others comfortable

[lovinggreeniehours]

❤️💚🩵💜 with five? :D (@comfortingstars)

YAYY FIVE STUFF YAY (<– literally did a jump as i saw this)

❤️ how did they meet? was it love at first sight, immediate enemies, or something in between?

HEHE. HEHEHE

ehem im normal about pre relationship arifive i swear

okay um. first important information you need to know is that five can time travel! his power revolves around manipulation of time and space, but he hasn't had the chance to delve into that properly

so five ran away from home and time traveled forward to the future and found himself in 2019, aka the end of the world! and five is ultimately trapped there because he doesn't know the coordinates to travel backwards in time 😭 no he didn't think that through at all

so arifive met in the apocalypse. ari's power essentially doesn't let him die, and he can regenerate any damage his body takes no matter how bad it is. and that's how he survived the world burning down long enough to meet five :)

(ari's account looks a little different though. the thing about five and his family is that they're all superheroes, and essentially celebrities. they even have fictional character counterparts in the form of comic book characters. so. let's just say pre-apocalypse arion had a very clear favorite)

💚 do they both realize they have a crush early on, or does it take them forever to realize?

five is a blockhead so he just. forgot that was an option. he doesn't like calling it a crush anyway 😭 i guess it took him a while to register that he cared. but then after a few hours maximum of agonizing about it, he accepted it rather quickly. five doesn't like dwelling on things, so he's quick to just move on and adapt

as stated before, ari had like. a raging celebrity crush-ish on five before the apocalypse so the first few days were like. the most embarrassing moments of his life compiled lol um. he definitely knew he liked five, but it took him a bit to get over the fact that five was much more of an asshole than he thought he'd be 😭

🩵 do they both act different once they realize they’re falling for the other? maybe stuttering or fidgeting or daydreaming more often?

ari is just coping here okay 🫡 rip guy. f/o turned real. he's a bitch and you want to kick him sometimes. you still like him though. what now. i'd say he's doing fine. but five really doesn't understand how or why this guy seems so intent on helping him?? like okay?? weirdo (😭)

five discovered he had feelings and then confessed like 2 hours after that so yeah! i guess there was a change!! i guess!! i don't think i can imagine them changing so suddenly because they both affect each other so much over a gradual course of time though

💜 how do they confess? is it a grand gesture or in a more mundane moment?

something like both? maybe? it doesn't really look like a grand gesture to me, even though it probably is. it's just that the way they do it is really soft and quiet and all that,,ww

it's a culmination of their main conflict: five might have to leave him behind one day to return to the past and stop the end of the world. since arion would be considered an anomaly in the timeline, there might be consequences if they stayed together

the day five realizes that he just can't do that is the first time he sees ari having to heal from a major injury (he shielded five from an explosion). he won't die, he knows. but for a moment, he just wondered. what if. for a moment he tried imagining a world without him, and then that was it. he couldn't do that. so he told him. immediately. there wasn't really anything special about it. they just talked. like they always do. arion had his doubts at first. the last thing he wanted to do was cause five trouble (he's been trying to keep him alive all this time already, he cant let that go to waste) but if there was anything five was good at, it was proving people wrong. so if arion thought five was just going to leave him all alone in some barren wasteland like he wasn't worth a damn, then. well, i guess he was wrong? :')

[sabbathbloodysabbeth]

I always forget that I shouldn’t give a shit about promoting something that I’m working my ass off on. That I should throw it in everybody’s face and glare as the yoke goes down there face 😡

Just kidding! Though I’m close to finishing up chapter two of ‘Bark At The Moon’ a little half way. And I decided why not post a little snippet from chapter 2. (Because im impatient and have control issues.)

Once again neither of them had been hiding their friendship at all, yet somehow Jason Carver was even more convinced that Chrissy had been cheating on him with Eddie. The guy was obtuse. Barely noticing that he was neglecting his relationship with such a wonderful human being, and seemingly being the only person at school who didn't pay attention to the gay rumors that have surrounded Eddie for years now. Sure, they were false. Well not fully. Like many things in life he even half assed being gay. Something that even shocked him.

"But I didn't even do anything Chris?" Eddie laughs softly. Turning his head to look at her shyly. Smiling gently as she gives him a bewildered look. Nearly stumbling over her feet in the process, blushing at the way Eddie's hand moves out and quickly helps her catch her balance. Smiling even more shy as he makes sure she's good before letting go. Ignoring the way her face goes a light pink.

A second passes before they both start to move again, Eddie's heart racing and face going a little red when he catches his Uncles eyes from the corner of his vision on them once again. He needed to ground himself, he was here to help search for Steve. Not trip over his feet for a cute girl who just got out of a relationship. That would be the most stupidest thing he has ever done, having a crush on somebody in a relationship is bad but liking someone who just got out of a relationship seeking for comfort? That might be worst. He felt like he was taking advantage of her, and he refused to do that. He didn't want to become some manipulative asshole.

"Well, I don't know. The fact that you knew more about my interests then my own boyfriend- well ex boyfriend. Was saying a whole lot about his character and very eye opening to me." Chrissy hums. Moving and walking again. Being more careful then what she had been. "And the fact that you went on a hour long rant over face time about how I deserved much better then him." She laughs gently. Eddies face only grows a bit more pink as he moves a hand shyly to move his curls in front of his face. In hopes to hide his facial expression. Though, there wasn't much hiding as he trips and falls on his hands and knees. Faintly hearing the laughter of his fellow teenagers behind him. He's flustered but what convinces him more that Chrissy is willing to be his friend, is the way she angrily turns on her heel and flips Jason and his small gang off. Silencing then, as Chrissy Cunningham never did such things.

Moving back, she bends down a little bit and helps Eddie up. Beaming as she giggles. "Happy to know I'm not the only clumsy one walking these woods." She jokes.

"Chrissy, you've literally been on top of a pyramid." Eddie snorts, not believing that she was clumsy at all.

"Yeah.. but that took a lot of practice. I don't know about you but I don't have much practice walking in these woods." She giggles, moving her smaller hands off from his forearms. Smiling as she starts to lead them forward once again.

"So...." Chrissy drags the word out gently, moving her feet and kicking stones around as they keep furthering their way into the woods.

"So?" Eddie snorts, looking at her with wonder. Biting his lip with a soft smile. Carefully fleeting his eyes from her back to the front of him. His eyes meeting Wayne's who was giving him a knowing look and a smirk. Causing him to mouth a silent 'fuck off' . He felt like some cringe eight year old dealing with his crush for the first time. This was all new to him, he's never had feelings for anyone before. Never had any desire about finding someone to have a relationship with, he was just Eddie and now he regrets not getting some experience. Maybe then if he had he wouldn't be literally tripping over his feet as much.

"Have you ever dated anyone before?" Chrissy asks curiously. Soft eyes looking at him, no looking through him as if she knows something he doesn't. A soft smile on her face, making her seem even more welcoming then before. Not judging as Eddie starts to cough a bit awkwardly, face a bright red as he shakes his head no in her direction. "Not even a guy?" She asks curiously. And oh god. Chrissy Cunningham believed  all of the rumors that surrounded him. Of course, her morbid curiosity was putting him in a rough spot. He was uncomfortable and he's never had to have this discussion with anyone before. Not even Wayne knew about his secret fantasies about Pedro Pascal, and if he did he was hiding it very well.

"Chrissy, you can't just ask things like that." Eddie hisses. For the first time since being around her, his shoulders are tense. His eyes fleeting over to his Uncle, who most likely thinks he's having one of the most straightest experiences of his life. Then his head turns carefully behind him, watching the way Jason jumps around a bit. Not taking any of this as seriously as he should. Here Eddie walked, on his journey to find Steve Harrington and on that journey he was somehow coming out as Bisexual. How ironic. Considering the fact he had a tiny, little crush on him when they had been younger. Long forgotten now.

"Oh, are you not?" Chrissy's eyes furrow with concern. "I assumed that you were after you wrote a whole poem about   Dean Winchesters chest." She whispers now. Catching onto trying to be low as possible.

Eddie rubs a hand over his face. Oh god he was going to die. He was willing to trip and crack his head open if it meant that he got out of this entire fucked up situation. Though there was something lurking inside of him that wanted to talk about this with someone. Of course, the whole conversation about Jenson Ackles "tits" had been had when he was completely high off his ass. Not thinking about what he was typing to Chrissy. Of course, a few other friends have received similar messages but it was something unsaid. Never to be brought up in front of anyone ever again. A stoned Eddie was a horny Eddie. Anxiety rose in his chest as he tosses a glance in his Uncles's way once again. Then sighing he gives in. Leans a little closer as he takes a shaky breathe.

"I do like guys, but I also like girls. And I would much rather leave my Uncle in the dark about that because there is no chance in a million years that I'm ever going to end up with a guy in the middle of bum fuck nowhere." Eddies voice cracks a little as he rambles close to the other. Wanting, no needing this conversation to be private as possible. "So-" he drags out the word that started this conversation awkwardly.

Chrissy smiles as she moves her hand down and carefully squeezes his hand into hers. Making his heart race as he quickly decides to add. "That and you can't just ask someone that out of nowhere? That's like... outing or something." His voice cracks more as he doesn't look up from the ground. Ears pink as well as he keeps walking forward. Not even sure where they were going, definitely not towards Steve Harrington. That was for sure.

"I'm so sorry. I thought we had this conversation over text message already. If I had known I wouldn't have just blurted it out like that. I know what it's like you know?" She says softly. Causing Eddie's head to poke up with interest. He's tempted to be bitter, tempted to say a snarky "how does the queen know? Do tell" instead he doesn't say that and just stays silent as he decides to listen. He wasn't good at good at reading signs, but this felt like a very keep your mouth shut situation.

"I think I might like both as well." Chrissy's soft voice cracks a little. Looking ahead, not meeting Eddie's eyes. "Though I think I have a preference for girls." She says gently. Eddies heart is conflicted. Here, there stood someone who was like him and that made him so happy. But there was another part, sad at the realization that the chances of being with her were remotely slim. He doesn't say anything, lets the information sink in. He squeezes her hand gently as he smiles painfully. Off to his left he sees his uncle smiling over at them. Probably assuming that they just confessed their love for each other, instead of coming out.

The situation was strong, emotional and overwhelming. But Eddie knew that Chrissy Cunningham was going to be his best friend in the entire world. No matter what he felt towards her.

Link to the first chapter

Chapter 2 should be up very soon :) I’m excited to share it lol.

[aajjks]

it's not rude not to like a story, it's only rude when you spam the author about it as if they're supposed to cry and delete it or something. leave alina the hell alone. I agree with that 100%.

however I'm also not surprised people didn't like it and that's OK too. I don't like it either. the issue isn't some backstory, or complicated personalities, but it's like these characters are.... not yanderes. I think that's what most people are confused about and then they feel disappointed because 🥹

your characters will

kidnap, gaslight

kill

but then they will also

have other partners and love interests (past or not)

easily break up over disagreements (children, sex, fights, misunderstandings)

so what exactly makes them a yandere.. and not just abusers....??? a yandere has their personality but their main trait is that OBSESSIVE LOVE.

yanderes can punish and hurt their darlings but they do not let them go over stupid disagreements... or at all. ever. if they do, that takes away from the whole point of yandere and they end up sounding like the random men you hear about on the news. add to that a female love interest and of course people are gonna be upset. it's never 'you you you' like it should be with a yandere love story, it's always 'you until it's inconvenient for me' so like.... like irl or on every other blog ever just a regular half ass romance lol

and this isn't a criticism at all, it's just a genre I'm very familiar with and I think its lost a lot of its original meaning. fics labeled as yandere these days can be so misleading.... when they are not yandere at all. they're just abuse. some asshole didn't wanna let you out of the house after you broke up.

so you stayed together but eventually he got tired of arguments and let you go.

that's not yandere. that's just abuse lol.

yandere comes with abuse, but it's not JUST abuse. the core is that crazy love and each of your characters is only crazy about yn if she doesn't cause any problems.... they don't punish her, or manipulate her, or beg, they do none of these yandere things, they just breakup. so like a normal abusive relationship lol. yandere means crazy and obsessive and so many people these days will label anything unhealthy as yandere.

so, knowing how easily these characters abandon the reader, of course readers will be upset that there is just another thing to take them away from them - a woman they like.

Im so sorry if this comes across rude, you are genuinely a wonderful person and author. I will always support you either way, I just wanted to say something because while people can be assholes, I feel like you often misunderstand why they get upset. I love your characters the way they are and I personally don't care.

All I Want to say is that you guys didn’t even give it a chance and then you guys started criticizing it- I do not have a problem with the criticism. I have a problem with how you guys often word your opinions and it is a problem and I will work on my misunderstandings, but you guys also have to work on your understanding of the characters. It just started. You have to remember that.

Also have to remember that I’m not the only one writing, there’s a role-play going on. There’s another person involved and they have their own preferences. They have their own way of story telling & character building. Also I would like to point out that nobody has a problem when it’s yn who has a love interest, but all of them have a problem and it’s jk.

A yandere Is not guaranteed to not have any past love interests or a love life

[hereticallyeverafter]

Long Introspective on Character Affiliation, line break to protect from my unpopular/horrible taste in ships:

On mobile, sorry for any linebreak goofs or typos, Im smort honnest lol.

I know I sparked some outrage, or rather, Spicy Discourse, by discussing my Littlesansa shippage- not that I regret that necessarily lol I still believe it would be/have been a politically advantageous move, but I want you all to know that I did do some reflection on my taste in characters. I understand that out of context, my proposal is horrifying and I don't deny that, but I have noticed my peculiar affinities for Unhinged Characters, not just GoT related. I think I haveva better grip o why, so I need everyone to momentarily suspend their judgement for a sec, I'm invoking a Safe Space Barrier. None of this is an excuse for my taste in characters (and people because it extends to real life too, with the sort of consequences one might imagine lol), just an explanation.

Other "Problematic Ships" I stan are Sessrin- I still invoke Cultural Context on this one because historically speaking, in that era of Japan, etc etc.- and Jolysui, so very clearly I lean towards just plain weird men.

I know the meter by which one measures out a reasonable amount of empathy is broken inside me and that I tend to empathize and extend grace to those who don't deserve it. But after the recent stink, I began to connect some dots. Like I said, you think my ships are bad, you should see my life. I've always gravitated towards "weird" or difficult to love people and that trait has been perceived and taken advantage of plenty. I guess you could say I do it to myself to an extent- if someone is a known asshole, when the relationship inevitably crashes and burns, you always have the "out" of saying "at least I tried".

It's like trying to pet a snarling dog over and over. It doesn't matter what your intentions are, intention doesn't protect you from consequences when you know or can reasonably surmise that the animal - or, to extend the metaphor, person- is hurting or fearful. I have been that stupid.

I think the characters I like are just an extension of that, but within the comparative safety of a fictional universe lol.

I realized this and began to wonder if I really am that stupid- expecting my innocence to shelter me from consequence- or I'd there's more to dig through. At what point does naiveté cross into being manipulative? Think about it: You see someone with all these red flags and attempt to befriend them but keep getting hurt. You have put that person in an unwinnable position: either they are going to continue acting from a place of unhealed trauma that they aren't ready to face, or they will respond favorably but still be forced to confront their ugly track record. You can't love or force people into healing, and simply trying is asking for creating resentment whether they heal or not. Unconscious or not, that is manipulative behavior at worst, and manipulative regardless as a form of emotional self-harm on your part for instigating the situation at best.

I've come to realize that some degree of me has been manipulative in this way in the past from a lack of security. I think my ships of certain characters are a reflection of that, and my "broken empathy valve" is a self-preservation excuse, but also stems from my neurodivergence. A lot of people like to blame their ND-status on their bad behavior, but I have ADHD with autistic tendencies, so there IS some bleed-through. While I acknowledge where my "bad taste" stems from, recognizing it in real time is still difficult, and I thinks what's worse is, I tend to gravitate, as all NDs do- towards other ND people or ND-coded characters.

So a fictional character I simp for in the safety of Imagination Land might look Unhinged or Proplematic to the average NT layperson but to me, it makes sense. While the people I like are red flags, the one thing I can say, the green lining if you will, is that they lack pretense. Because their pain or limitations are so bare, when I inevitably get bitten, at least I CAN blame myself because I knew what I was getting into, they didn't lie about themselves. They didn't hide their intent. They didn't or couldn't mask.

I doubt anyone would read this or read this far, and I am afraid if someone does, they'll just roll their eyes and call it an excuse anyway. God forbid anyone enjoy anything. We can separate the art from the artist but not the art from the viewer. I can say my silly little ships are ultimately harmless but there are people who will argue that it's not, like I'm going to start advocating for child marriage or human/demon interbreeding. I only care about a person's ships insofar as what it reveals about them psychologically (hence the word wall) but I would never stoop to presume that they were actionable bc that's just such a weird leap to make. My bad taste in people wasn't or isn't informed by my "bad taste" in fictional characters; it's the other way around lol

[rivallol]

TW VENTTTT and i oop-

So like uhh explanation, me and my friend were goofing around and like i just got s great idea because like "hey you know that one guy? ___ yeah whats his number imma annoy him lmfao" and she told me his number and so every day i would like text him like "IM BRINGING CHILI" "omg me and ____'s facetime today such a slayyyy" and i just today it was diffrent i sent him sum and i just started thinking "I am an annoying asshole i am a bitch" you know? so i decided to delete all my texts to him and block him and im honestly wondering if that was the right decision? was that good? Maybe i should just block everyone in my contacts and just run away until i can get myself fucking together so basicly never return cuz i dont think i ever will and i dont know why what tf is wrong with me? i just dont know anymore, maybe i always was the toxic manipulative one. I dont know anymore, I am anything but a saint, i am a sinner, i have done everything i can wrong, why cant i do anything right? anyway thats pretty much is. Prob will delete this later-

[the-official-account]

[ID: Above, the meme image "I know this and I love you" edited to say "I see this and I love you, but hush.

Below, an image reading "filter that makes me not long winded" flipped upside down, to illustrate the succinct version is above.]

(this commentary for sure contains spoilers, just SO many)

This post is an oversimplification because it is a joke, but wheeeeew do i have thoughts as someone who is currently on rough, terms with a friend for similar reasons to Anya, and who read The Vanishing Half and who is both capable of loving actual assholes characters but doesn't actually think spar's a jerk just because he acts like an ass sometimes

Like. There's so many layers here. Especially knowing how altered people were treated before the war? I can't help but wonder if, if spar's parents were still around, they would have been able to warn him:

"These institutions try to define greatness and then make themselves the only paths to reach it but the true definition of greatness is closer to a precise, intentional subversion that can never be achieved to the full love and approval of your oppressors and i promise that, eventually, knowing this will stop hurting"

But you know. sometimes people learn that shit the hard way. and thats okay #and i understand where anya is coming from but it hurts me that her first thought was

"He hates us now, he hates me"

and not

"Spar dont you see these people sre poisoning everything you admire about yourself?"

and of course anya is more than just a supporter to spar but idk! it can mean a lot to hear "im still here. I don't like where you're at right now but i'll always be here because one day you'll start to question if this is the only way towards a future where you are loved: if the only way is to be someone other than yourself.

"And when everyone is telling you that's true it takes a nigh-insurmountable amount of strength and knowledge, to believe in something better: your own inherent worth but it easier when there's someone around to remind you you aren't crazy....in any way that invalidates your expirience, at least."

ANYWAYS GHOSTPOSTING THIS @ MY FRIEND <3<3<3 SIGH. but you get the idea. Or, if not, the idea is that I'm SO biased here and my assessment of ''the right way all obstacles ignored'' might be wrong! I'm down to see

But PWIs, fantasy-ones or no, can function like a...weird distortion of a cult. depending on how you navigate them, and i can see how spar would be SO vulnerable to that as someone with a legacy to live up to. that shit makes you SO easy to manipulate.

So ultimately, I feel that the right question is "hey why are you isolating like this are you ok??" (Knowing that self-isolating can take MANY forms and one that is actually very common is acting like an asshole to push people away on purpose they're less likely to notice its an isolating behavior at all #caineveThings) and not "do you not like me anymore?"

But there's ABSOLUTELY no way one could expect anya to know that. Especially not with her dad being the way he in (in fact the way in which he's extreme could've actively shaped Anya's assessment and her willingness to write Soar off as a loss she'll keep mourning forever rather than ...well) and her overeliance on her ability just makes her more convinced of her initial assessment.

Its so sticky. It's a really sticky situation. And I'm really, really loving it.

Anyways I'm tagging @threeheartscast and @citrusandsalt because this seems like the kinda post y'all would like but don't tell me if I'm hot or cold! I wanna find out!

Me: haha spar is kinda awful! I love learning how he reacts under pressure I wonder how else he's an ass

Anya in tempest and the teapot:

Me:

[party-rockers]

ugh im thinking about my ex and i just, >:(((( he makes me want to light shit on fire

[vergess]

im gonna slam these thoughts and feelings here because you usually have Good Sociological Takes about this kind of stuff and i think the world at large would be better for it if this was public, here it goes. I have Issues with the way weaponized incompetence as a concept is like used?

like i have no doubt that it is a thing that exists but i think it gets applied to a lot of ND people (esp men actually!!!) unfairly because i know for a fact that MY behavior would DEFINITELY be construed as weaponized incompetence wrt to household tasks...except being disabled, i literally Do Not Have the skills to DO domestic chores correctly.

I don't have the physical strength to scrub things as hard as they need to be scrubbed, it's hard for me to remember when to clean things, only the very smallest of vacuum cleaners are light enough for me to use which in practice makes the act of vacuuming rooms too long for my executive functioning to handle etc. (and my family gives me shit for this constantly but thats besides the point) and like...

am i manipulative a little bit about avoiding doing domestic chores? kind of! because i HAVE to be because people flat out DO NOT BELIEVE me when i say "hey i am actually bad at cleaning things" and even when i DEMONSTRATE it visibly does look like i am "phoning it in" on purpose, even though i am not so i have to be a sneaky little asshole to dodge doing chores because i have to in order to not waste what energy and time i have doing a chore that i will never be able to do properly anyway.

(and this isn't ALWAYS about NT people having higher standards for cleanliness, sometimes i genuinely cannot wash a thing to the level of safe human hygiene standards because i do not have the physical strength/motor skills to clean it. housework is physical labor i cannot do.)

I know the problem here is probably "you spend too much time on reddit" but i constantly see people whining about how all their spouse does is come home from work and then play video games and as much as i wanna empathize with the other half in this scenario (and i get it, they do deserve a break from housework too)

the "person goes straight from work to play video games all day" type of person is ME. because i CAN'T do housework. And i wonder, how many people who are all "dump them, they are using Weaponized Incompetence to get out of being an adult" realize that not everything that looks like weaponized incompetence IS weaponized incompetence?

How many men (bc its usually men getting accused of this) doing this are actually disabled and don't know it? And now, to bring gender into it, it gets even more annoying, because i am a woman, so i am expected to know how to do housework and am constantly told "well you don't know how to do chores because you refuse to learn how" when it's not ABOUT learning how, i physically cannot do them. I am cis esp physically but socially i have actually always id'd as "failed/broken girl" SPECIFICALLY in relation to my inability to Do Female Coded Chores. This, more than anything else, makes me Not Like The Other Girls.

In summation, intellectually i guess weaponized incompetence is a thing but in practice i don't think its real, it really sounds like a thing some people made up to be ableist towards disabled people yet again :/ but maybe i am wrong?

I never actually see it applied to women but i feel like its only a matter of time, society will always see afab who can't housework as defective girl anyway, and i am dreading my immediate family ever learning about the concept because i fit the description to a T even though it's literally not true in my case but there is no way to PROVE that because it all relies on just believing me and taking me at my word about my ability level because watching me fail a task is literally indistinguishable from someone "obviously phoning it in and perfectly capable."

(I feel that way about a lot of things, actually, that "spotting a fake" anything is actually impossible because so many failed tasks in any discipline look EXACTLY like someone pretending to be bad at the task.) 

--End of submission, line breaks added for clarity--

Oh boy it's time for everyone's favourite cop-out-that-isn't-really-a-cop-out:

~dialectics~

Which is basically the fancy way of saying "two things can be true."

Having experienced both weaponized incompetence and disability in myself and in partners, weaponized incompetence is definitely a real thing and it definitely needs to be discussed.

But just like everything else that can be used to shit on the disabled, it is used to shit on the disabled, especially those with chronic illnesses and invisible disabilities.

Both of those things are true.

Abled people, especially abled men, will skive off of doing their reasonable and legitimate share of home maintenance by pretending to be worse at things than they are, so that others living with them will pick up their slack. Absolutely a thing that happens.

And as soon as people became broadly aware of this, they began blaming disabled people who cannot do those tasks by claiming the disabled people are victimizing them through weaponized incompetence.

This also intersects pretty nastily with capitalism and labour (what doesn't). Since working outside the home is generally a matter of immediate survival, and working inside the home is generally a matter of long term survival, work done outside the home reads as More Important to our monkey brains. It's that much harder to cut off outside work while you any remaining brain space and energy. So, by the time you're "done" with outside work, you're genuinely too exhausted to do inside work.

So it gets put off for as long as you can bear to ignore it.

And if for no reason other than sheer socialization, women tend to be more aware of the dangers and exhausting effect of an unclean living space than men, and thus can 'bear to ignore it' less, which means that it tends not to reach the point of being consciously upsetting to men. This isn't universal, obviously, but it's a broad pattern that tends to arise any time one party is socialized as 'bring home the paycheck' and another is socialized as 'manage the living space,' even if all parties are required to work for pay to survive.

IMO, the onus is on people accusing/discussing weaponized incompetence to make, maintain and enforce the distinction between "refusing to do things they absolutely can and should be doing because they expect to be served by others" and "refusing to do things they literally cannot because they are sick."

Unfortunately, because the experience of being a victim of injustice tends to narrow one's focus in the extreme, the act of remembering the other thing is also true tends to slip by the wayside.

Ironically, this mimics the very weaponized incompetence they are complaining about. They both can and should maintain a conscious awareness of the distinction between "can and won't" and "can't and mustn't," because they are so focused on their own legitimate status as a victim on one force, that they forget they can and are perpetrating another force.

[elysianslove]

Here to ask- could you rank the jjk boys on terms of kinky to vanilla ;) Also love your 🍆hcs I definitely would not be complaining if you said more 🤭... ♡♡

*dice rolls* sure thing shawty 😩 also thank you so much omg. i got another request for a dick analysis so 😼

for this, i basically explained each of the boys, then ranked them at the end! 

JJK BOYS: A SCALE OF VANILLA TO KINKY 

itadori yuuji 

he’s somewhere in between! yuuji is curious enough to be considered kinky, but also he’s so loving that vanilla generally is his go to. not that vanilla can be a bad thing, because sex with yuuji, even if he’s not tying you up or spanking you and is just simply fucking you in missionary, is mind-blowing good. he never really is the one to initiate kinky things, or to ask to incorporate new things in the bedroom, but he’s always a hundred percent on board with anything you ask, no matter how extreme, even if he’s on the receiving end. maybe he’ll be the one to ask for things like “can i choke you?” or “can i blindfold you and use this toy on you?” but the hardcore shit has to come from you. it’s not entirely shyness, but there’s some of that too. he’s just generally new to sex, so even though he obviously has kinks he wants to try out, he sees sex as a way to pleasure both you and him, and that’ll be his main drive. if you want to add to that somehow, there’s absolutely no problem! 

fushiguro megumi 

oof he was a little tricky. i think he’s also somewhere in between, but definitely leaning way more towards kinky. like if it was a number scale, 1 being really vanilla and 10 being really kinky, megumi would be a good 7 or 8. it’s always the quiet ones. i think, at the start of your relationship, and when things start to get a little more intimate, he’s more vanilla, just cause he doesn’t wanna accidentally cross a line he hadn’t known was there. but as he gets more comfortable with you, he’ll definitely start asking you to change things up a bit. he’d do it cautiously though, cause what he’ll ask of you are either extremes, or kinks that have a high chance of you saying no, like pet play, or pain play. he’s definitely into dom/sub dynamics, and he’s a switch so, if you can also help him play out both roles, he’s in heaven. this was not an ask about his kink can i stay on track smh. but yeah, megumi’s definitely kinkier than he is vanilla, especially as your relationship grows and the level of comfort and trust between you does as well. 

gojō satoru

do i even have to. he’s so kinky it’s off the scale. he’s always trying out new things. start, middle, end of the relationship doesn’t matter. maybe he’s romantic on your first time. genuinely though, he’s very kinky, and is open about it too. here’s a twist though, i actually think he’s capable of being vanilla, but on very specific occasions. if you ask him, he’ll be a little shit about it, teasing you the whole time. but sometimes, he prompts it, and it’s usually when a mission goes wrong, or if something goes wrong and you nearly get hurt, or you do get hurt, and valentine’s day cause like. obviously, in his words. also gojō’s kinky in the sense that sex with him is always exciting and new, so while he’s not always incorporating extremes, he might just grab his blindfold and put it on you once, or mid-sex he’ll ask you, “wonder if i can make you cum on command,” or something of the sort. also. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. gojō probably has a piss kink im so sorry. 

nanami kentō

mostly vanilla. accidentally kinky. sex is something very important to nanami, something so intimate and special, something he wouldn’t share with just anybody, so most of the time it’s just that, a chase after your pleasure and his. but he is like, accidentally kinky sometimes, especially when he’s angry. he’ll be extra rough, practically using your body to chase after his own high, degrading and humiliating you, you know how it is. so essentially, he’s vanilla, with a hint of kinky that’s unlock-able during certain situations. but! just cause he’s vanilla doesn’t in no way mean you will be able to walk the next day, because you won’t. trust. 

ryomen sukuna 

this one’s weird cause, sex is traditional with him, but also it’s really, really not? like he has sex for the pleasure and he fucks to fuck, and he thinks things like toys or bindings or roleplay and he doesn’t like wasting time edging you or going all out with scenes, but he is kinky in the sense that there is huge power dynamic going on between you, or that he loves to see you cry, or that he loves to see you writhe in pain, or that he loves to call you the nastiest names. so like, he’s kinky, but that’s because that’s just who he is. it’s his personality projecting sexually, you get me? sukuna acting differently or weirdly would be him being vanilla, him being soft. (he is, very, very, very rarely). but does that make any sense? so yeah he’s kinky, but not for any other reason than him displaying his personality traits sexually. 

getō suguru

oof he’s so kinky. will put you on a leash and take you out if you let him, honestly. the thing is, he’s so subtle about it. it’s not that he’s private, he’s just really fucking subtle that sometimes he’ll be the one with the kink but it will seem like it’s you? somehow? manipulative bastard. he’s also so suave and cool about how kinky he is too. like he wants you in a collar kneeling before him, but he’s acting like it’s the most natural thing ever? like that’s just how everybody gets off? idk he’s hella kinky but seems so vanilla and for that reason we should all be scared. or aroused. both. 

inumaki toge

not so much kinky as he is open and adventurous, but also like, not exactly vanilla either. he definitely has a freaky and nasty side to him, but he’s not itching to live out those fantasies. i don’t think they’re so extreme either though, like it’s different and nontraditional, and they’re certainly kinks, but he’s not gonna suspend you mid air with a vibrator attached to you. but will he force orgasms out of you with his technique till it’s borderline painful? absolutely. honestly, toge’s leaning more towards vanilla than kinky, just cause yeah he’s for sure open to try out things, but he himself doesn’t really have anything too extreme to try out or in mind, you know? idk he’s always so difficult for me to figure out im sorry. 

todo aoi

idk man he just. fucks cause. yk. sex! i think if you ask him to choke you he might be genuinely so shocked, and that’s one of the most common kinks out there. he does seem like he’d be into pet play though, maybe, possibly. but genuinely i don’t think there’s an ounce of kinkiness in him. sex with him leaves you braindead for sure, and yeah of course there’s the whole size kink and stomach bulge thing going on, but he just. you know. he’s a basic bitch. a basic bitch with a monster fucking cock though. 

fushiguro toji

it’s kinda like the sukuna thing. it’s just his personality. so i guess he is kinky, but like. what else would you expect from someone like him? *a sexy ass dilf like him? so something like a power kink or a size kink is obvious, of course he’ll get off on that. but also, separate from sukuna, i think he does have so many kinks that are separate from his personality projecting, things like orgasm denial or breeding or! his weird obsession with sex toys. plugs you up after cumming inside of you and makes you go out like that, cause you know, he’s an asshole. 

mahito 

kinkiest fucking person. or curse. he can alter his body. he can alter his body. can you imagine the shit he’d do to you with that? obsessed with sex toys, any form of orgasm play, denial or overstimulation, will suspend you mid-air with some toy attached to you, is an exhibitionist, would love to have a gang bang, praise, degradation, cum play, literally anything and everything you can fucking imagine. he’s like gojō but nastier and unhinged. a menace to society in every way, but at least he’s pretty and giggles cutely. 

ranking time! from vanilla to kinky, we have 

1. todo aoi 

2. nanami kentō

3. inumaki toge

4. itadori yuuji

5. ryomen sukuna 

6. fushiguro toji

7. getō suguru 

8. fushiguro megumi 

9. gojō satoru  

10. mahito

[marlinspirkhall]

i just finished reading your horror fic 'tomorrow never comes' and i loved it sm!!! say do you have any aos spirk horror fic reccs? your work has started me on a binge and im down for some creepy shit

Hey! I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed Tomorrow Never Comes; it's nice to see it getting some love.

[ID] An illustration from Tomorrow Never Comes shows an image written in dried blood which reads "PLAY ME" in all-caps, with an arrow pointing to the right towards a green PADD. [End ID] Illustration done by the wonderful IdeasCornucopia on ao3, @idealisticcatastasis on tumblr

I've isolated the specific search for AOS K/S "horror" for your convenience.

Recs in no particular order:

Descent of Halcyon by itwastheband

Kirk is plagued by headaches, nightmares, ghosts and visions. I had the honour of beta-reading this fic for the 2020 T'hy'la Bang, and I loved every minute of it.

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence.

Relevant tags: Alternate Universe - Sentinels & Guides, Blood and Gore

Killer Plants From Outer Space! by cowboyjimkirk

This fic is a real treat, you'll love every moment of it. One of those fics which feels like you've read a classic, mind-bending sci-fi novel. I can't recommend it enough.

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence.

Relevant Tags: Hanahaki Disease, Tarsus IV, Body Horror, THIS ISN'T AS DEPRESSING AS IT SOUNDS I PROMISE, it's just a nice halloween romp

Secret Vulcan Mating Rituals by Chase820

At first glance, this fic doesn't seem like a horror fic, but before long you'll be reading about violence, murder, espionage, repression and mind-torture. An excellent read if that's your kinda thing, with a surprise Doctor Who cameo in the middle. Please note that this fic is unfinished as of 2012.

Warnings: Rape/non-con, graphic depictions of violence.

Relevant Tags: Porn With Plot, Spock's World (Diane Duane)

in dreams i cry to wake again by Ahira

I'm a little biased because I was present in the t'hy'la bang 2022 server when this was created

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply (see author's tags), non/con

Relevant Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, Blood, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Body Horror

Kashan by Plotweaver

Torture-heavy fic which leans pretty heavily on some horror conventions. Angst with happy ending.

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Relevant Tags: hand whipping, Hurt/Comfort, romulans being assholes, Torture

In The Dark by imzadi_deanna, with art by thunderbottle

I'd be remiss not to recommend this fic by my partner in crime imzadi_deanna, as she was my wonderful beta-reader for TNC. "In The Dark" is unfinished at time of writing, but the chapters that are there deserve a read if you like disturbing imagery.

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Relevant Tags: Psychological Horror, Tarsus IV, Hurt!Jim

Honorable mention: Safe by SidSky

This isn't a K/S fic, but I'm including it because it's my go-to fic for anything fucked up. It really has a handle on Leonard McCoy's characterisation and headspace- and my god, does it drag you down into that headspace with him. The chapters on recovery at the end are wonderful, and it does a better job at making Khan truly terrifying than any other piece of Star Trek media. Go over there, and tell Sid that Marlin sent you.

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence.

Relevant Tags: Kidnapping, Manipulation, complex characters, Mind Games, Torture, Violence, suggestive threats, Character Study

Thanks again to @idealisticcatastasis for the page dividers, they're always good fun to use on TNC posts.

• [prev] Endless Spirk Fic Recs [next] •

[technowoah]

In a rich man's world

I wrote this in a day be proud yall :)

A C!Schlatt b̶l̶u̶r̶b̶ imagine (platonic)

+ C!Wilbur x reader (established)

⚠︎ swearing, manipulation (?), drinking, smoking, mentions of weapons. I didn't proofread

"STAY THERE. Dont come for me until I say that its safe. I know Schlatt will follow you so dont come-"

"GET EM OUT OF HERE!"

"Stay my love!"

This wasnt what you expected when Wilbur said to stay. You didnt think that staying in Manberg would insue that Tubbo would be considered Schlatt's vice president and you becoming his "First Lady".

He said in his own words, "Im interested in you. To be honest I don't know how someone like Wilbur can get a woman like you."

You took that to heart instantly. You and Wilbur were together for a reason. You loved him and he loved you. You and Wilbur built L'Manburg, you followed his dream and right now you are watching his dream, firsthand, be destroyed. You had watched him loose the election by 1 percent to Quackity and Schlatt and immediately after that get run out of his own country by the man he now despises. The man that's now your president.

Late at night you remember the faces of Tommy and Wilbur who were standing in the middle of a crowd of archers, their arrows pointed towards them as you tried to push your way through to get to Wilbur. He finally grabbed your arm and took off running, dragging you along with him.

The three of you finally came to a stop by a river when he said those words to you. Wilbur had told you to stay with Tubbo until things blew over and the two of you could see eachother again. Tommy continued to yell in the background that they should continue to run, Wilbur tried to give you one last hug when he was ripped away by Tommy.

You stood there breathless as arrow whipped past you and nearing your feet. You heard footsteps behind you. Thinking it was either one of the archers behind you, you didn't move until a hand was placed upon your shoulder. Discomfort flew through your body as your mind caught up to the idea that Schlatt was behind you.

"Dont watse your time. You heard the man." Schlatt said as he ended up walking away leaving you stunned.

He was an asshole and he knew it too. You could probably tell he was smirking as he walked away. That bastard just came all the way here just to taunt you and then leave. You ended up going back to the podium where you met with everyone else who didn't chase after Wilbur and Tommy.

Your mind was filled with hatred for Schlatt and uncertainty for the future. With Wilbur you had a future already made in L'Manburg, you two were going to get married, have children, reign in L'Manburg, but now what?

Schlatt ended up asking both you and Tubbo to come up onto the stage during his second presidential speech. You both stood, one on each side, of Schlatt uneasy. You were figeting while you awaited the reason why he brung both Tubbo and you up there. Tubbo looked anxious, he was flinching everytime Schlatt motioned towards him. You wish you both could find some comfort in this situation, but you couldn't grasp onto anything.

Schlatt then announced Tubbo as his vice president and you as his first lady. And that's where you are now, in a huge room with a round table sat in the middle. George, Quackity, Tubbo and you were sat around it the 5 of you barely taking up the huge meeting table.

That place is where he said those words to you, that he found you interesting and belittled your and Wilbur's relationship. That's where you realized he was doing this on purpose. Everything had begun to clear up in your mind as the days went on.

Time was passing and you haven't seen Wilbur in days. It was tiring and both Tubbo and Schlatt saw this.

Tubbo and you began to take nightly walks after working for the ram-man to blow off steam and complain. You always found yourselves following the path the Tommy and Wilbur took before stopping and wondering which way they went. Soon those walks became more informative because Wilbur gave Tubbo the green light, and gave him the coordinates to their hideout. He had told you that Wilbur knows that Schlatt is keeping an eye on you and it's safer until Schlatt lets his gaurd down.

Tubbo told you one night that Wilbur had teamed up with Technoblade, and made the underground city Pogtopia. He said it looked beautiful down there and that you'll love it. He also told Wilbur that you were Schlatt's first lady and he freaked out. After realizing that Tubbo kept telling you what was happening, you decided to make Tubbo your messenger boy until you could see Wilbur and Tommy again. It was sad that this was the way you two had to communicate, but whatever it takes for everyone to be together.

Schlatt on the other hand. He noticed you moping around in meeting rooms and while writing decrees. Schlatt wasn't good with words, we all know that, but he was good with material things. As days passed by and letters were written you began to find jewelry on your nightstand, gleaming in the moonlight without a note. More things began to show up in your bedroom, that Schlatt had given you. You said you were uncomfortable with sleeping in the same room and after a little bit of back and forth he obliged.

Bracelets hung on your doorknob, rings on your bed, enchanted weapons, basically anything that shined was in your hands.

Schlatt had even invited you to have a one on one meeting with him about a new decree he was working on. He sat at the head of the table while you sat on the side of him.

Schlatt slid the papers over to you, a cigarette lazily hanging from his mouth. You had gotton used to the smell of alcohol and cigarettes while being around Schlatt because that's what he smelled like 24/7.

"So what do ya think?" Schlatt ssid while blowing out smoke.

"It's sucks!" You said in disbelief.

"I want you to rewrite it then." He leaned back inhaling more smoke.

"What?!"

"You heard me broad! Write my decrees from now on." Schlatt said getting up from his chair.

He had put a table against a wall that was placed there for types of alcohol he wanted during a meeting. He grabbed a huge wine glass and a full bottle of red wine. He opened the bottle and drank a little from it before pouring a full glass apparently for you. He offered you the glass, slightly sitting on the table infront of you.

"I dont wanna do this shit anymore. It's boring so you'll do it for me. You know, I was gonna have Quackity do it, but. No. Just no." Schlatt shook his head as drank straight out of the bottle.

You smirked as you drank from your glass as well. You knew he was lying. You just didnt know the exact reason why. At this point you didn't care, you had the power you and Wilbur wanted in the first place, everything seemed to be coming full circle for you.

The decree was sitting right in front of you next to the cigarette Schlatt placed there, not caring if his cigarette was put out or not. You remembered the jewelry and weapons he had brought you to cheer you up and the fancy red wine and the glass that held it that shined like diamonds.

Schlatt finished his bottle of red wine and slammed his bottle onto the table. He rolled his head around and groaned. Schlatt turned his head to look at you from his seat on the table.

"So whaddya think?"

Maybe you could stay for a little longer.

[rattyoakenbitch]

❝𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞❞ ─ 𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨

hey, it's not like you ever tried to stay . .

❥ content ; gn reader, angst, dark themes, yandere themes, toxic relationship

❥ warnings ; sxlf hxrm & mxtilation, swearing, verbal abuse, manipulation, slight nxdity lol

❥ synopsis ; all you wanted was his attention. and by the gods, you were going to get his attention by any means.

❥ a/n ; first mello fic (: i've been wanting to write something dark for a while and ig i finally got the opportunity lol. i thought i got out of my death note stage but i'm back, so please don't be afraid to send requests or ask to be added to my nonexistent taglist! alsoo while this oneshot does include s/h, i am in no way glorifying or romanticizing it!!! but i do tend to write angsty and dark fics. again, this is a work of fiction and i don't intend for anyone to take this too seriously and let this influence them.

The loud crash of a glass echoed throughout the room as a vase went flying through the air and collided with the wall, just a few feet from where you were standing.

You didn't flinch. Didn't scream. Didn't cry. Didn't react. You were used to Mello's fits of rage by now, months into your relationship. If you could even call it that, at this point.

You knew Mello wouldn't dare lay a finger on you; if he did, he'd cut off his own hands and have live with the guilt forever, knowing he brought you harm. Which is why you didn't react.

However, he didn't seem to have a problem when it was only verbal.

"I don't fucking get you!" Mello spat harshly and continued to rant, "Why did you think that was okay?! Did you once consider how I felt?! I was worried sick that some asshole hurt you but you come back a day later and tell me you were at some boy's house!"

You only scoff, leaning against the wall in a relaxed manner, eyeing the remaining shards of the vase carefully. Just like Mello, you were incredibly stubborn.

"Answer me, Y/N!"

"Okay, Mihael," you state cooly, using Mello's legal name and causing him to listen more intently. "First of all, I don't know what you expected me to do when you invited your weird mafia 'friends' over while I was trying to sleep. Second, he's not 'some boy', his name is Y/F/N and he's one of a few people I can trust. I don't know what you think of me."

"You could've gotten a hotel room, that's what!"

"With what money, Mihael?! What fucking money? You forced me to quit my job and then practically lock me up in this hell hole that I can't even call 'home' anymore!"

Mello huffed. "Pfft, you should be grateful. I've kept you safe all this time, away from the dangers of the world. You're alive because of me. Me. You're mine."

"Yeah, some fucking life, right?"

"I provide for you, I protect you from the monsters out in the world, but you still decide to go and whore yourself out to your little 'friend'," Mello sneered, his sharp voice dripping with venom.

You stared at your boyfriend in disbelief. All words, all arguments and nasty retorts expiring on your lips.

"I.." You start, but laugh pitifully. "I don't even know what you're saying. I don't know if you even know what you're saying. Honestly, Mello, just when I thought you couldn't surprise me anymore, you start spewing complete and utter bullshit out of your mouth." Mello's silence only egged you on. "It's no wonder Near always came in first place." Aaand there it was. You snapped.

If looks could kill, you'd be dead. Mello's eyes widened in anger at the mention of Near, reminding him of his inferiority.

In a completely different situation where he wasn't on the receiving end, Mello would be smiling proudly, listening to your clever retorts and comebacks. You've always been as stubborn and hot headed as him, and he really liked that about you, fuck that "opposites attract" bullshit. (I ACC LOVE THAT TROPE LOL IM SORRY) However, considering you were both extremely toxic people, it was far from entertaining when it was you who got in a fight with the other.

You didn't stop, though. If he was gonna play that who-could-be-more-toxic game, you weren't gonna back down.

"I don't know if it was the explosion or you've really always been that stupid, but you need to get the fuck over yourself and stop throwing tantrums when you find out that I have a life, too, and I have friends. Friends who actually give a damn."

You stare down each other in silence, a heavy tension hanging in the air. Still, after a few moments, Mello didn't make any effort to speak or react, other than walking out of the room.

Days, weeks went by. Mello hasn't spoken a word to you. Hasn't even looked in your direction when you passed each other or walked into the same room. You didn't exist anymore, and it worried you.

Mello was never like this. Within a few days or even hours after an argument, you would easily kiss and make up. Had you gone too far this time?

Besides the fact that Mello was intentionally giving you the cold shoulder, he was also busy with work, and was out of the house from midnight to early afternoon. During that time, you would stay at home and carry out your every day mundane tasks and chores.

Even now, you didn't seek comfort in your family or friends. You were either busy keeping the house clean, sleeping, or entertaining yourself on social media. But it was all a sad attempt to keep your mind occupied on anything else other than Mello.

And one day like any other where Mello was out doing whatever the hell mafia dudes do, you snapped. You decided you were sick of the silent treatment.

If Mello was gonna play dirty and ignore you, you were gonna give him something to react to.

Mello came home some time after sunset. Kicking off his boots as he walked in the front door, he immediately knew something was off. It was quiet - too quiet. Despite the fact that you were practically taking some sort of forced break after the argument, you acted the same. You went about your day and didn't bother acting shy or timid around Mello. You still hummed earworm pop songs to yourself or put on a podcast to fill the tense air. But now there was nothing. Just Mello, the walls, and the silence.

Mello cautiously walked around the house and searched for any signs of you, fearing the worst.

As he frantically looked around, he stopped abruptly at the sight of blood smeared onto the hallway wall.

Blood.

His heartbeat began to thump loudly in his ears.

Then he noticed more blood. And more, smeared up on the wall, and eventually a trail picked up. He followed the bloody trail as it lead him through the hallway and stopped outside of your shared bedroom that he hasn't been inside for weeks.

Mello shakily inhaled and braced himself for whatever gruesome scene he would walk into.

He reached for the doorknob, twisting it and letting himself in.

Soon as he did, he ceased all motions, his breath caught in his throat as he tried to process what his eyes were showing him.

There, you sat on the bed, nothing on but your underwear and one of Mello's shirts. On one hand, you loosely held a pocket knife. On the other, you had your sleeve rolled up, your inner arm facing Mello's direction.

Your doe eyes looked up from the floor and met Mello's panicked ones. He was finally looking at you again. Despite the gorey setting and the stinging in your arm, you smiled. You were real to him again.

Multiple cuts oozed blood and trickled down your arm, onto your now dirtied clothes and the once satin white sheets below you.

As Mello got closer, silently freaking out, he could now see that these weren't just cuts - you carved out words. Sentences, onto your arm.

Among the many bloody 'I love you's' and pleads, one word stuck out to him.

It was his name.

He felt sick. Distraught. Guilty. Afraid.

"Y/N," he choked out shakily.

His gaze trailed up your arm, your body, and fixated onto your seemingly innocent face. Your face was rested and gentle, your eyes still staring up at him with adoration and desperation. If it weren't for the blood that painted your whole body and surroundings red, he would have found comfort in your presence.

"I did this.." You ran your fingers along your fresh wounds, not once wincing or drawing back in discomfort. "For you."

You continued, a sick sweetness in your voice. "Jus' wanted to show you how much I love you.. You've been leaving me so lonely, Mello." You frowned. "It was only a matter of time before I had to do something. And now you're finally here.. And you won't leave me again."