#i jus saw this line and had to share :3

[osaemu]

on a scale of 1 to america how free are u tonight

[noxitsnox]

if we get too closе, would it be okay?

hyun-ju x gn!reader - highschool au

summery: hyun-ju came out to her- now ex- girlfriend who spread the rumor around the whole school.

tags: trans/homophobia (the word tr**ny is used one (1) time), bullying, hurt/comfort, lots of fluff i promise, let me know if i missed anything!

a/n: i am obsessed it's not fair. this is pre-t but i'm still going to use she/her pronouns for hyun-ju <3 also english is not my first language and this isn't proof read, so i apologize for any mistake. @exactlyinfp

hyun-ju didn't want to go to school that day. her girlfriend, ex girlfriend now, broke up with her just because she trusted her, because she didn't want to hide anymore and she believed that her girlfriend of almost two years would understand. but she didn't. she called her all kind of names and blocked her everywhere.

she hoped this was where it ended. that they could just ignore each other and keep living life as it is. it would have been so much easier that way. but the moment she entered the school hallway she knew something happened. the looks she was getting were strange, full of hate. definitely not the looks you receive when you just broke up. she tried to ignore it and walked to her class with her head down.

it was early. a lot of time passed before some of her classmates entered the room. maybe it was better if they stayed outside. their chatter died down as soon as they saw her. one of them, who was seated next to her, took his desk and dragged it as far away from her as possible. “you're sick”, he said under his breath. “stay away from me.”

she stayed silent as the realization hit her. if he knew, everyone else did too. fighting tears, she forced herself to keep cool.

slowly people filled the room. everyone ignored her, even her so called friends looked at her with disgust. only y/n seemed to be acting as if nothing happened. maybe they didn't know about it yet. they’ll turn their back to you like everyone else, she thought.

“oh hyun-ju, how are you?”

y/n waited for an answer that never arrived. so, with a sad smile, they spoke again. “it's fine. you don't have to talk with me. you have my number in case you change your mind.”

———

for the rest of the week she ignored everyone. she was barely alive.

every morning she entered school feeling like a criminal. her locker in the changing rooms was filled with insults. some guys even tried to push her on the ground. that was the only moment she reacted. she could ignore words, but physical aggression was were she drew the line.

every night she cried herself to sleep, wishing she had someone on her side, someone to talk to. her family didn't know about what was happening in school and she hoped for it to stay that way or she wouldn't even have a home anymore.

it was on saturday afternoon that she lost it. she was out, getting some groceries for her mother at the local market, and she saw her ex with her friends. she tried to hide before they could notice her, but she wasn't fast enough.

"oh god, isn't that that tranny you used to date?", one said pointing at her.

"don't say that out loud, please. what will people think of me?"

hyun-ju ran away without even taking food from the market stall. she kept running until their voice became indistinguishable echoes.

she sat on the side walk and took out her phone, looking for y/n contact. she started crying, the tears blurring her vision.

their words came back to her. you have my number in case you change your mind. were they serious? she hesitantly called them, hoping for the best.

y/n didn't take long to answer and for that she was grateful.

"hey, you called!"

"i- yes... listen can you, can you come here?"

"oh hyun-ju, you're crying? is everything okay?"

"i don't even know anymore. please, just come here." and with that she hung up the phone, quickly shared the position with them.

she hugged her knees as she waited.

———

y/n was happy that hyun-ju called, even if the situation wasn't ideal. even though they weren't intimate, they cared about her and it made them sad to see her suffer. especially if she was being ridiculed for something beyond her control.

y/n tried to get to her as fast as possible. they went out in their sweats without bothering to put on something nicer. they didn't like the idea of hyun-ju seeing them in that state, but they also realized that they had to put vanity aside at the moment.

as soon as she saw y/n she got up and hugged. they remained in that position for a while. hyun-ju cried and cried while y/n rubbed her back, doing what they could to comfort her.

"sorry... i don't know why i did that", she said as she let go of them.

"you don't have to apologize. do you feel better now?"

"i do, thanks."

an awkward silence fell until y/n suggested they start walking with a wave of their hand, "do you wanna talk about what's happening?"

"i just want to forget about it. can we talk about something else?"

"oh sure", y/n looked at her and smiled. "do you wanna hear about this manga i'm reading?"

a/n: i realize that for an xreader the reader is barely there 😬 sorry. let me now if you liked it!!

[readbyred]

may i request how the dps boys would react to realising they have a severe crush on a, preferably shy, reader! tysm <\3

Oh, I've been waiting for dps requests! Sorry for my late replies everybody, I got demotivated again because tumblr deleted a few of my x reader posts (and a few others). But I'll try to not let that happen again if I can even help it

I think Knox would have such a silly time trying to approach you. Because we all know he’s awkward, but determined at best and, well… pushy at worst. I'm trying to go with the version I saw in a play, because thankfully they cut out the party scene which means he’s still delightfully insufferable but not awful. Anyways, he would jump on every occasion to talk to you. And then just. Stand there. He’d try to give you flowers and poems, everything really. But he loses brain cells every time he’s around you. At least you’re both equally stressed about social interactions. He gets a little braver when you give him a smile or any other sign you like him. Not less awkward, but a bit more motivated to go for it. His main problem is that he can't read you well and despite being big on feelings and all, he still has a hard time actually talking to you. Clumsily, he showers you with over the top things, that most would find cringey but you think of as endearing. And if he thinks there's a chance he’ll lose you, he’ll confess right away. I think he is brave and pretty open about feelings. Just stressed out

With Neil, it's not an issue at all that you're shy. He’s more so taken aback by his own strong feelings. Because he wasn't expecting to fall this hard. But give him like five work days to process and he’ll be all in. I feel like he would take his time to confess but he’d make it known that he cares about you. He’d be checking up on you every time he can, bringing you coffee, asking to practice lines together, go to the movies in town. Even before you two start dating you just wake up and half of his sweatshirts are in your drawer (he likes to borrow you his clothes if you’re cold) and your desk is littered with poems he shared with you. He’s a gentle lover, but he knows what he wants and when the time is right Neil has no problem confessing

It's much funnier with Cameron because this boy is in panic mode 24/7. At first he legit thought he was sick because he always felt dizzy and distracted around you. And he’s a traditionalist. Everything has to be perfect when you’re around. Like he beats himself up about every little mistake he made around you. But also makes a point to treat you RIGHT. If you’re shy he might not know how to approach you at first, because he’s not sure if you’re even interested. And how to make you like him. After much teasing (mainly from Charlie, of course) he gets fed up with his friends and decides to make a move. It might not be the most romantic when he does, but it's sweet and genuine

Another one that would take time to confess is Meeks. He’s pretty quick to accept that he’s crushing on you. He’s like, yeah obviously they are amazing, now what do I do with that? He tries to give you things. Small things. Like maybe he could borrow you a book that you’ve wanted to read for a long time of buy you a coffee/tea if you’re out in the town. He doesn't explicitly say that he liked you but it's easy to tell and he’s not one to be shy about it either. So when you guys do get together, you already know his more… romantic side

On the contrary, Charlie takes time to process his feelings. He had crushes before, but real feelings (strong ones at that) aren't the norm for him. Sometimes he catches himself losing his cool around you and it messes with him so bad. He would probably ask Knox for advice. Which is a bad move. But he figures that at least his friend is more familiar with having those sorts of feelings. Nothing much comes of it because I can't imagine Knox giving him any good advice on the subject, but after he was able to talk about liking you, he decides to just go for it. Well, in small steps. Primarily because he’s just not an intense guy, but also because he’s surprisingly mature when it comes to respecting your levels of comfort. Doesn't mean it gets boring though, it's Charlie we’re talking about. Once you get together there's not a one dull moment with him by your side

With Todd, it might be difficult at first. He’s overwhelmed by fis feelings and has a tendency to talk himself out of making any sorts of moves. Why would you like somebody like him? He tells himself he doesn't have a chance, surely. It only confirms his suspicions when you don't take initiative. It's only after he’s been moping around for a few days that Neil approaches him about it and proceeds to give him shit for not doing anything to let you know his feelings. He’s like, bro, so you care about them so much that you’d rather not have them in your life because you want them in your life so much??? Make it make sense. So with Neil's encouragement, he tries to at least talk to you and see where it goes from there. Still shocked when you end up returning his feelings. You’re in his poems now, even if it's not very obvious (he's not as straightforward as Knox, so it's not ‘i love (yn) and I want them to be mine’ kind of deal). This is the only one where I'm sure you might have to make some sort of a move. Todd’s like a spider - he’s more scared than you are and if he could, he would just silently hang out in the corner of the room you’re in. But he gets a little braver after he starts feeling more secure

Lastly, Pitts is not as bad as Todd, but still takes his time. He’s comfortable with liking you and he knows what he likes, but he’s not in any rush to make things official. So any time he has any chance to talk to you, he does and just wants to see how things go from there. He jokes around with you, asks to come study together, tries to be close. He does care, just in a more chill way than some of the other poets would. If you two have been talking for some time, he would have no problem asking you to go out with him, doesn't make you feel pressured or anything. If the others are cool with it he will do his best to have you come to their meetings at night as well. So you do not only get an awesome boyfriend out of it, but also a great friend group

[love-lilly02]

The Challenge Pt. 3

He had never been so fucking aggrivated in his whole goddamn life.

Countless times, he was able to track down anyone based on the smallest piece of information. You give him a first name, he has their social security number. You give him a face, he has their entire family lineage lined up and ready to go.

With birth certificates to confirm.

And now he had your personal records - your full legal name, birthdate, parents name and occupation , plus whatever else was required to enlist in the military. It was all right at his fingertips, readily available, prime for the taking.

And he had found absolutely. Fucking. Nothing.

Price exhaled heavily, running his hand over his face. The computer glared at him angrily, blinding him against the dark of his office. Your records sat in front of him, multiple copies spread out and annotated to point out different information. Your full name, family names, birthdays. Anything that he could use to help find information on you.

All of it was worthless.

"Still up?" Gaz walked into the office, flicking on the light. "You won't find anything if you overwork yourself, you know." Price groaned internally, glancing at the younger man in front of him.

"Better than having to wait for a lead." Price said. Gaz hummed, moving to stand behind the captain's chair. " 'Fuckin hopeless. This girl's got nothing on her. I've been looking for a week nonstop and the best I could figure out is that she's got siblings. Not even who they are, just that she has them."

Gaz massaged his captain's shoulders, reveling in the relived groan he let out. " Jus' ask her, cap. I'm sure she would be willing to-"

"Gaz I can't just ask. That defeats the purpose of the challenge." That wasn't exactly true, but he didn't care. He was determined to win this challenge on his own.

"Soap tried and he got a few good answers. You said it yourself, we work as a team, well get her as a team." He could do nothing but nod along to the man's words.

"Just wish it could be faster."

It had been a week. 

One entire week of absolutely nothing, no questions, no pestering. 

Nothing. 

Part of you was relived. Maybe they forgot, or just gave up. Another knew that this has to be some kind of ruse, these men were entirely too stubborn to give up on something like this. 

Every second of silence had you questioning your skills. You could go back in and double check, do a run over of your parents accounts to be sure they hadn’t posted anything. But going in on the base’s wifi guaranteed getting caught so that was out. 

Your phone was essentially useless, just another way to track down your movements, and it wasn’t like you could call someone and ask them to do it for you. 

So you waited. and waited. and waited. And nothing happened. Save for a few curious glances from Price, all seemed to be well. 

The next lead actually came from Gaz, of all people. 

You were all sitting in the rec room, watching Soap yell at some rookies over a soccer game. Every so often he would look back at the team for assistance, but it was very seldom that one of you would nod or side with him. Otherwise you stayed quiet and watched the entertainment. 

“You ever play sports?” Gaz asked, sipping his drink carefully. The question sounded casual but you knew the weight behind it, and as if a switch flipped off both Price and Ghost leaned in closer to hear your response. 

“Tried a few different ones.” You passed it off with a shrug. “None ever really stuck.”

“How come?” It was prices turn then, and at some point Soap had been flagged back over to the couch to listen. All four of your teammates were now sitting attentively around you, looking like children during story time. 

“ ‘Dunno. I’d do a sport for a while, get good and then loose interest.” You take a sip of your drink. “I’m sure if I tried any of them now I’d be shit.”

A loose chuckle flew through the room, and you saw Price roll his eyes. The four of them shared a look, though you couldn’t quite pin down what it was. 

“What was your favorite?” Soap prompted, shuffling closer. “I’m a soccer guy myself - obviously - but I can see you doing volleyball.”

“Or track,” Ghost spoke up this time, lifting his glass in a salute almost. “ ‘Runs so fast you’d swear she’s on fire.” 

That made you roll your eyes. “I got recommended for track but turned it down. The coach said-“ They all waited for you to finish, but you shook your head. “No, no I’m not talking about this.”

Soap groaned. “Awh, come off it lass. Just a bit of small talk, eh?” 

“Yeah, so you can get more information outa me.” You responded, setting your glass on the table. “That night was the last time i get drunk and blabber off to you lot. You want those photos, you’ll have to find them yourselves.”

Instead of a laugh there was a groan, even Ghost looked disheartened at your words. 

“Come on, luv. you gotta give us something.” Soap pleaded, giving you the biggest puppy dog eyes ever. 

“We have something. She’s got siblings, a brother and a sister by the sounds of it.” You whipped around at Prices words, staring at him with a mix of shock and horror. 

“How did you-“

“Your files. Did some deeper digging a few nights ago. The problem is, I can’t find anything related to you or them. Got your parents stuff just fine, nothing on your siblings.” He pauses, eying you up and down. “Like they don’t exist at all.”

There’s a tense silence in the room, and you stare at your captain with a blank expression. “Dunno what to tell you. Look harder, maybe?”

The tone of your voice is flat, and the team sees an emotion they haven’t seen on you in a while. 

Fear.

“Maybe." Is all Price says, reaching in his pocket to grab a cigar.

Things from there go somewhat back to normal, although you’re significantly more quiet than usual. Finally after what you deem is an acceptable time you turn in for bed, Making a B-line for your rooms. 

“That’s not normal.” Is all Ghost says. “People aren’t scared of their families.”

“Hypocrite,” Soap calls back. A pillow is flung at his head shortly after. 

“Simon’s right. She seems to come from good sort, why doesn’t she want anyone finding out about her history?” Gaz ponders quietly, tapping his hands against the arm of the couch. 

“That’s for us to find out, apparently.” Price places his hand on top of Gaz’s, silencing the rythmic taps. 

The soldiers sit there for what feels like an eternity, pondering over the mystery that is their teammate. 

You don’t sleep at all that night. Tracking be dammed, you have to make sure that everything is clean. You knew that your files could be a huge risk, as you were required to list all family members, but you didn’t think Price would lay that much attention. You didn’t think anyone would pay that much attention.  

Just shows how inconsiderate you are. 

All of your socials and your parents socials are clear. Your siblings are something you don’t have to worry about, as they aren’t allowed phones till they’re older, much less social media. you check over all of your old friends stuff too, ensure that all pictures with you in them were taken down, anything with your name was removed entirely. 

You avoid the main problem. In the event that they’re somehow smart enough to figure out they can track your search history through the wifi. 

The less they could find the better. 

Here she is!! Thank you so much to all the people who left a note (even if it's just a like) your interactions helped so much with getting motivation! I hope to have the next chapter out sometime this week, but there wont be any promises <333

My Masterlist

[digita1garden]

I feel like once I get out of the lab I got my masters with (within the week) and get a job in something relevant (hopefully by January) I have to decide if I want to say anything about how bad it was to the school. I know that grad school is famously fucking horrible and punishing, I know that it’s “normal” to be super depressed and overworked when you’re doing it but like. Surely the schools at least want to look like that isn’t the case?

I highly doubt anything would happen even if I did complain because my professor is well liked and pretty well known in his field, plus he has tenure, but I at least want to know if what I experienced is actually in line with others or not.

So if someone else in grad school could look at this list of lab members and their situations and tell me if this is the normal rate of attrition and suffering due to poor management by the PI? At least so I know, even if I don’t go out of my way to say anything about it.

Those who got a degree:

M - 8 years with the lab to get his Doctorate (graduated 2022)

M - 6 years with the lab to get his Doctorate (graduated 2024)

C - 4 years towards her Doctorate, mastered out (graduated 2023)

L - 1 year toward her Doctorate, mastered out (project, graduated 2024). I knew her personally and the decision to master out was very difficult for her. She loved the subject and was passionate (and said she might go back for a doctorate again later) but couldn’t do it at this place. She didn’t tell the PI for months after she had decided.

Myself - 3 years in the lab: 1 as an undergrad working on a group project, 2 working on my masters thesis when the original goal was 1. Skip the rest of this paragraph if you don’t want to hear me just complain hahah. Part of the delay was due to the microbes being difficult, and part was because I became incredibly depressed and was not handling that well. When I was balancing everything best I was there for at least five hours seven days a week, when I was not doing well or was doing something particularly trying I would work for twelve or so hours as many days a week as I could manage, but sometimes I would just be unable to be there at all for a week or more (not on vacation, not sick, just I Could Not Go In). There were several weeks when I was only able to work with my dad or a friend sitting next to me in the lab because if I was alone, every time I looked at the amount of work to be done I would instead start breaking down under the pressure. I was forced with no warning into a teaching position I was not ready for and didn’t want, then shamed when I had not taught according to the unclear expectations of the PI when he returned. I was expected to learn how to troubleshoot the TCD GC entirely independently while running 60 samples (in duplicate [not the preferred or “lab-standard” triplicate]) on a four minute run (=10 hours work time) several times a week, while also being in the lab during “working hours” only and sharing the GC with undergrads, and when the PI returned and saw my results he was frustrated and said they were basically useless but didn’t even complain because he thought I was just too useless to do it right {incorrect, I had been doing hundreds of injections per week from the same syringe and no one had taught me or included in protocol that the gas tight syringes needed tightening after use, so it was just leaking really badly the whole time and none of the many things I checked/adjusted in my methods or the GC settings could’ve solved the problem}. Also, out of the three members of the committee who decided if I graduated or not, two were asleep during at least part of my defense and one of them was my PI.

Those who didn’t get a degree:

Ju - Spent several months working towards their Doctorate with our lab but left after taking a class taught by the PI and taken by only them and L which went wrong (situation unclear to me but they all got interviewed by the school). Presumably working with another PI now.

A - currently perusing her Doctorate, was originally being advised by our PI. Worked with him for a few months, proposed research including traveling to our professors area of expertise. Was told by him to 1- learn Spanish, 2- learn the VERY complex carbon budget of the region, and 3- be entirely field ready in THREE MONTHS. She said that it was impossible to do it all but she would try her best regardless. The next time they discussed, he was firm on the requirements, and when she said she would at least need money to support herself so she could do those things rather than her 20 hr/week teaching position he basically laughed her off. She dropped him as her advisor and is now working with another person at the school who isn’t demanding she learn a language in three months.

Other leaving situations:

Ja- She was either a post grad or Doctorate student from Germany who came to the USA to work with our lab. Stayed for only six months. I was told her main complaint was (paraphrased) “a professor in Germany would never treat me this way”

Ji - post grad hired by our lab. Worked with us for maybe six months before leaving due to poor conditions.

And now that all of us have left, the only remaining lab “members” are:

W - six plus months into deciding whether or not to get his doctorate with the lab. He has presented his proposed research (very poorly) and does not seem to be what the professor is looking for, but for some reason neither of them will call the relationship either way so he is just. Around still.

V - 2 years into his doctorate, doing great work but missing a lot of skills that are very basic for our lab, which leads to him causing problems without noticing/catching them, and our PI is basically ignoring this from everything I can tell

J - 2 years into his doctorate, doing like four different projects at the same time. Lives with four loud undergrads so he is at the office until 11 every night working. Travels with the PI the most often, and has alluded to at least one very poor experience with that. I have only ever seen him actually smile once and it was when he was out of the lab/office and away from the PI so I hope he is okay.

D - undergrad. Already overworked. I went to move something to the freezer at 11 pm a few weeks ago and he was there working. He reminds me of myself in my early days there and I have tried to give him a few of the warnings I think I needed back then without being weird about it. When I leave, anything unfinished goes to him, which is why I’ve been going back these last few months at all.

Maybe some new undergrads? The other undergrads I knew last year were working with specific people who have now left, or didn’t come back this year.

[leverage-ot3]

there are a LOT of really good additions in the comments to check out! I won't mention everything because the post would be really long but I want to highlight a few:

@glassfullofsass wrote:

To me, it's a canon "queer" relationship in that what Eliot shares with Parker and Hardison is not the relationship of a straight man and his "married" friends. It's queer in a very real-world, saying-fuck-you-to-the-hegemonic-ideals-of-patriarchy, definition of queer. Which is lovely and I'm happy with it, but it definitely is not a clear cut "these three people fuck nasty" kind of situation. To me, the word of God' "confirmation" tweets confirm that understanding. So I do shy away from pushing Leverage as "it has a canon polyam ship" because that's not the case. And to me, the writing and acting in Redemption actually lessens the queerness of the ot3, especially the episodes without consultation from John Rogers ...which is unfortunately most of them. What the show has is canon (queer) found family, which is just as valuable, but might not be what someone wants

@partofthequeue2 wrote:

Creator Jon Rogers has definitely tweeted stuff about the OT3 (though not explicitly in a romantic context), but that was more Word Of God supporting fanon interpretation after the original series ended/before the new one was devised rather than outright stating that had been his intent all along. For the new series, I think it's likely that even if they had wanted to go down that route (difficult with one of the 3 only guest starring) it would be vetoed by the network.

@castiel2010 wrote:

John Rogers has tweeted that they’re ot3 but the show itself never made it canon (unfortunately). Though I guess that might change now that he’s showrunner for s3.

@mistbornhero wrote:

I feel like you might have been ot3 baited by the fandom, not the show itself? The foundation for a solid friendship is there, as is for a romantic one, but the ending was fairly open to possibilities, and fandom decided to run with it. I think an important bit is that it's not Not Canon, and it is an encouraged interpretation by the creators, which is- well, I've been in fandom a while and it's pretty unusual.

there are a couple parts I want to point out that I think definitely pointed to the interpretation that they were canon, and that is the stuff that the creators (ESPECIALLY) john rogers have said regarding parker, hardison and eliot

I don't have the screenshots on my computer (what I'm using right now), but there were two big instances where jrogers mentioned them on twitter that I think majorly influences how the interpretation of canon if within the fandom.

in 2012 after the long goodbye job aired someone tweeted something along the lines of 'oh my god did they just make the ot3 canon?" and jrogers tweeted back 'you're welcome', which, word-of-god wise is pretty concrete. like yeah, online interactions shouldn't always be taken super seriously, but the fact that he decided to reply to that tweet at all and then reply to it saying 'you're welcome' sure is SOMETHING

also when redemption was announced someone asked on twitter if the same characters were coming back and he replied 'your ot3 is safe'. a lot of people only saw that tweet semi-out of context (that the person was asking if the original characters were coming back, not if the ot3 was 'still' canon), but the fact that he specifically said ot3 instead of just saying X actors would come back was certainly interesting

I also think there is definitely something to be said about how they are very much still a Unit in redemption. I believe it's canon that they've been living together all this time and working together as a trio for the past decade. and I definitely think they can be viewed at the very least through a queer (if not queerplatonic) lens in terms of parker-hardison and eliot.

I also think that things might have been different if jrogers was the showrunner and main writer for redemption from the get-go instead of just a consultant on some eps (I think he consulted a bit). after all, he was the writer that spoke most overrtly about the ot3 dynamic AND was the showrunner and creator of the original show. the fact that he is the showrunner for s3 does give me a bit of hope that he might make it more overt and possibly undeniably canon in s3 but I'm not trying to get my hopes up too much

there are a lot of arguments about whether or not the ot3 is canon, and I see valid points on both sides. I think it would be a lot easier to outright shoot that down if the characters weren't explicitly written as a well-oiled machine of a trio that have been domestically living together for a decade. their relationships (both three of them together and the individual bonds) are very intimate and domestic which strengthen the canon interpretations. I've also seen people talk about how the relaitonsip dynamic is open for eliot to sleep with other people but he always comes back to his family at the end of the day (parker and hardison)

I hope I haven't fandom-baited anyone with my posts and I just want to acknowledge that there's a surprising amount of nuance for things associated with canon

This is probably an unpopular opinion but after having watched all of Leverage... I think the ot3 is queerbait?

I went into the show expecting them to be canon at some point because that's what I was told. But I didn't really see any indication that they were until the very last episode. Sure they have moments in which they show they care about each other but it's only explicitly shown as romantic when it's between Parker and Hardison. They're the ones that get their feelings said out loud, their relationship defined, kiss scenes, while Eliot is off hooking up / going on dates with other women all throughout the show.

And look I do think the last episode could be interpreted as romantic, but you could also interpret it as platonic ! It's not a full on confirmation because you could say "well Eliot just needed a family and he really cares about his friends that's what the last scene was about" the fact is there's room for interpretation only with the ot3.

But okay there's word of god so let's say despite it all it's not queerbait and it's canon it just happened at the very end, cool! So in Redemption they're together... Right ? Now I haven't seen the show but I heard Eliot actually has a girlfriend. I've seen a post talking about how no no that doesn't change anything and talking about subtle clues and again, the interpretation of some scenes. Everyone is free to interpret things in the way they want it just feels weird again. I assume Eliot's relationship with his girlfriend is confirmed like there's no doubt no room for interpretation. So why isn't that the case with the ot3 that they said was canon then??

To me this feels like the creator knew people shipped them so he sprinkled some jokes and scenes and gave a final scene open to interpretation to satisfy some fans but not enough to turn off other viewers with a polyamorous relationship. And when they got a reboot they backtracked to not turn off viewers.

And I like seeing the way fan read into scenes I like the idea of the ot3 but I feel like the creators just took the easy way out because they didn't want to actually show a polyamourous relationship while keeping the people who wanted to see it engaged. You know give just enough to satisfy them but not enough for it to be undeniable.

[from-the-clouds]

Kiss Me More (Part II) - Zemo/Reader

Masterlist || Part One

Summary: Part two, read part one if you haven’t already! Sam & Bucky put reader in charge of looking after Zemo....again. Series loosely inspired by this song.

Words: 2.5k

Warnings: Kissing, heavy petting, mentions of sex, minor TFATWS spoilers.

A/N: Wow! I was so shocked on the feedback I got on the first part of this story. It has nearly 800 notes. I’m not used to my writing getting that kind of attention so I really appreciate the love. I decided to make this into at least a 3-4 part series and there will be eventual smut, but I feel like there’s something sweet between these two that goes beyond an obvious physical attraction, so I do want to build that a bit before we get there. This weekend I rewatched TFATWS & Civil War because I’m officially obsessed with Zemo lol. Please let me know what you think, and let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist. :) 

-----

“Keep an eye on him.”

Y/N watched Bucky and Sam split off again. That was now at least the third time she’d heard that phrase since she arrived in Riga. Little did they know, she was probably the worst person to be put in charge of Zemo. Truthfully, it was starting to be a little insulting.

It was unclear why she’d been brought along on this mission, when half the time Sam and Bucky were talking in hushed tones just out of her earshot. There was always more to the story than they told her, but this time, it felt like she was more out of the loop than ever.

She adjusted the neckline of the sweater she wore out of an abundance of caution, checking subconsciously to make sure it hadn’t exposed the mark Zemo had left on her from the day before. It was a discovery she’d made that morning, and persisted despite her efforts to cover it up with makeup.

“According to those two, I must be the best at babysitting you,” she muttered under her breath. It was petty, so she wasn’t even sure if she wanted him to hear. But he did.

“Babysitting?” Zemo lifted an eyebrow. 

“You know, a nanny, a governess….whatever a Baron’s equivalent is,” she said, looking him in the eye for the first time that day, which was a mistake. He looked so handsome in that long, fur-lined coat, tall and refined, hair styled perfectly. There had to be warrants out for his arrest since escaping prison, and in his current getup, he was hard to miss. 

It wasn’t easy to ignore the stifling tension between them. The Baron hadn’t left her thoughts since she’d closed the door on him the evening before. Now they were alone again. She couldn’t decide if that was thrilling or terrifying, so she decided on both.

“It’s nice of them to give us some alone time,” Zemo stepped close to her, one gloved hand pressing between her shoulder blades. Despite the cool temperature outside, it was the first thing today that had her shivering. 

“Walk with me,” he commanded sternly. She saw no opportunity to refuse as they started in the direction opposite of where Bucky and Sam had disappeared. 

“Zemo-”

“Helmut,” he corrected her. “But go on…”

“We have to focus on figuring out where Donya’s funeral will be,” she said, feeling his hand slide down to settle on the small of her back, trying to inch away, but he just pulled her closer. “We can’t waste time.”

“I know Riga inside and out, that won’t be as difficult as you and your friends think,” he murmured. His proximity was already suffocating. Or maybe comforting. It was hard to tell. “Tell me, what is your business with them? You aren’t an Avenger. This was my first time hearing your name.”

She snorted, finally finding the strength to pull away, and he dropped his hand. That was one thing that had confounded her. He was confident, took liberties with what others would allow, but knew when to stop pushing. There was something alluring to his nature. 

“I’m not,” she responded, wondering how much she was willing to share. When she stole a glance out of the corner of her eyes, his head was lowered, leaning in, listening intently for her response. She wondered if he really cared, or if he was good at pretending. It was easy to believe that he did.

“Bucky and I aren’t that different,” she continued. “That’s why we’re friends. I’m not a super soldier, but I was taught how to fight, how to kill. I followed orders for too long without questioning whether or not I was doing the right thing. And at least now, I think I am.”

“You think,” he repeated, and corrected her again like he had the day before. As much as she wanted some kind of clever or quick quip back, she wore her heart on her sleeve for the moment and shrugged. There was nothing to defend when she still wasn’t sure what responsibilities she had in this world. 

Zemo halted, and she paused too, turning back to look at him. “So you were an assassin,” he murmured, reaching out. Nodding slightly, she lowered her eyes when his gloved thumb brushed across her face. The buttery, overpowering smell of leather took her over as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I would’ve never guessed. Du bist so süß.”

Her knowledge of German was limited, but she could see a flash of what looked like affection in his eyes. He couldn’t be lying, could he? She wondered. She wanted to trust that he wasn’t, wanted to identify every good part of him she could, so she could justify the overwhelming attraction she felt towards him. Something in her just kept pulling forward against her will, like a magnet.

“You’d be surprised,” she answered, but didn’t pull away. The intensity of his gaze made her feel weak, but there was something strangely reassuring in his eyes. It was just the two of them, standing on a crowded sidewalk.

She rose her hand to clasp around his, frowning when she felt the hard loop of a ring on one of his gloved fingers. It had gone unnoticed by her, until now. He still wore a wedding band. 

It would have been easy to vocalize the observation, gauge his reaction, try to regain some upper hand and remind him who exactly he was dealing with. But, it would’ve been pointlessly cruel, as she knew what that felt like to answer that question. Those days were behind her, now. 

As if the universe was scolding her, a loud car horn broke through the perceived silence. His hand dropped from her face, and they began to walk again. 

“I had lots of time to think in prison,” he said after a heady pause in conversation. “About the things I’d done. Whatever intentions you have, to someone, you’re always the enemy. What I thought was important, trying to serve the greater good, it isn’t always worth the trouble. I was trying to protect what I had already lost, the places and people I’d taken for granted.”

Deciphering his words, she took a moment before responding. “That’s actually...very insightful,” she said, partly surprised by what he’d shared, appreciating that he felt her vulnerability, and matched it in his response.

“I know you’re stunned I’m not a brute,” he answered, increasing his pace to a determined strut rather than a lazy stroll. She was forced to keep up with him. “You’ve been told what to think about me by Sam and Bucky.”

She scoffed. “Not just them. The entire world. All the people you’ve hur-”

He halted and turned to face her so quickly, she collided with his chest and her breath caught in her throat. 

“I’m not that man anymore,” his voice was nearly a growl, disgust laced in his features as he looked down at her. 

But as soon as she recognized it, he became expressionless again, backing away. Falling back into step beside him, they continued to walk, a bit faster than they had been before. She followed him, at this point convinced that she might get lost without his guidance, but a little startled by his sudden change in behavior.

“What do you think of Riga?” he asked her as they cut through an alleyway. His voice held none of the venom that it had a few moments ago, so she wondered if she’d just hit a sore nerve.

“It’s beautiful,” she answered, admiring the old brick buildings and fine architecture. “But I think I haven’t had much of a chance to appreciate it.”

“Have you been thinking about me?”

They ducked under an alcove, and she realized he’d carefully led her off the crowded streets. It was much quieter here. She suddenly didn’t feel as protected as she had been with him in the open. The temperature in the shaded space was much lower than expected. And he was standing over her, waiting for some response she didn’t know if she could give. 

“I haven’t forgotten about last night, liebling,” he continued. 

Of course she had been thinking of him. Nearly nonstop. What they’d shared, what it meant. She hadn’t been able to sleep until she relieved herself, fingers rubbing her clit and delving into her warmth, whimpering his name when she finally came. Still, it had done little to quell the ache inside her. 

It was a horrible thing, she’d decided. Objectively horrible, and unprofessional. There was the consideration of accessibility. What did he see in her beyond a means to an end? Was she really going to throw everything she’d worked for away to a man who was going to use her to scratch an itch?

Too much was at stake, Sam and Bucky’s trust, her reputation, her job, and she couldn’t allow it to go on. 

But oh, how much she wanted it to. 

“Yesterday was nice,” she straightened up, holding her own. “I won’t lie to you.”

The corner of his mouth tugged up slightly in a self-satisfied smirk. 

“But I’m not foolish,” she continued. “Coming on to the first woman you see after you get out of jail? Seems pretty convenient.”

At first, the Baron tilted his head to the side, his brows pulled together at her words. But after a moment, the smile returned, and he chuckled. “Is that what you think this is about?”

“Don’t insult me, Helmut,” she said sternly, trying her best not to feel embarrassed. She was only being honest.

“Are you always so severe to yourself?” he asked, tutting lightly. 

It would have been better to say nothing. Why give him anything at all? 

She didn’t answer his question, just backed away from him and began walking in no particular direction, wanting only to increase the space between them and regain her common sense. That was impossible however, as she was jolted backwards before she even knew what was happening, a firm hand on her upper arm, and she was chest to chest with Zemo once more. 

“We were in Madripoor together. I could’ve had my way with many women there if I wanted. But I didn’t.”

“Please-” she rolled her eyes.

“If all I wanted to do was fuck someone, I could have done it by now,” he stalked forward, the air pressure around them dropping, weighed by the tension hanging thick between them. “But that’s not what I want. I want you.”

His words, spoken in a soft, low purr rattled away every bit of resolve she had left in her. Some last ditch effort found her stepping backwards, but her body met the brick wall behind them and she realized he had her cornered. 

In more ways than one, she thought.

Taking in a shaky breath, she looked up at his eyes, clouded with lust. “I know you want me,” he said, not a shred of doubt in his voice. But why should there have been? He was right. 

Her eyes darted around, like someone or something around them was going to jump out and save her from herself. It didn’t go unnoticed. “There’s no need to be scared, liebling. I feel it, too.”

With that, he closed the gap between their lips. He tasted sweet, like the candies he’d been eating back at his flat. Turkish delight. She was drowning in him again, his scent, his touch, everything about him enveloped and beguiled her. Her shirt had bunched up slightly somewhere along their walk and his gloved hands explored the exposed skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. 

She surrendered, letting him tease open her mouth and claim her wholly. It was still bad, she knew. But there wasn’t any last bit of self-control left in her. 

The layers of clothing between them didn’t allow for the same proximity she’d had to him the evening before. Groaning in delight and frustration, she reached up to tangle and rake her fingers through his hair, as his fingers curled around the top of her sweater, revealing the sensitive skin of her neck. 

“Don’t hide this,” his lips left hers as his eyes focused on the stamp of affection he’d left behind the day before. “Let them see.”

“You know I can’t,” she responded, sheepishly pulling it back into place. Studying her with amiable consideration, his hand rose to brush tenderly across her cheekbone. 

“I thought you’d come to me last night,” she confessed, drawing away slightly, shocked by her own admission. But right now, she didn’t feel the need to put up as much of a facade. He looked positively virile; panting, his cheeks flushed and hair mussed, pupils blown out as he focused on her. To know she was the cause of his current state of disarray gave her an immense amount of satisfaction. A buried, salacious part of her wondered what else she could do to make him look even more unkempt.

“I considered it,” he said, sounding almost timid. “But I want to do this right.” He leaned in, pressed a kiss beneath her ear. “In private, so no one can disturb us,” he continued, lips moving down her neck. “We can take our time, you can be as loud as you’d like.”

The mental image he was currently painting for her was doing very little to strengthen her convictions, whatever those had been. The thought of her legs wrapped around his torso, naked bodies pressed together sent a bolt of electricity through the pit of her stomach, radiating outwards. She wanted his lips on every inch of her skin. Aching at the possibility, the present tease of his teeth nibbling on her collarbone wasn’t helping.

“You know we can’t,” she didn’t try to stop the thought as it came out of her mouth.

“What is there to lose?”

Everything, she thought, but didn’t answer. She couldn’t really, as his gloved hand was trailing slowly under her jacket and sweater, against her bare skin, and cupping her breast through her bra. Whimpering, she couldn’t control the way her body arched against his.

Hooking her knee on his hip, she let him press forward, feeling the warmth of his excitement through his trousers and her jeans. He ground against her once, teasingly, and she moaned softly into his mouth. 

He was the one to pull away, and she was thankful he did. “Think about it, liebling,” he said softly, pressing a tender kiss to her temple. “Du hast die Kontrolle.”

“We can’t,” she answered again, but even she didn’t believe herself. Raking her hands through her hair and adjusting her rumpled sweater, she straightened up. “We have a job to do.”

Brushing past him out of the alcove, each step she took away from him gave her the self control she desperately needed. She glanced over her shoulder to see him reluctantly trudging behind. At this point, she wasn’t foolish. There were only two ways this could end.

----

Part III

Series Taglist: @juice-1981  @sapphiredreamer26  @tatooineisdry  @marvelsvision @spookycereal-s @trelaney @fireghost-x @booksarekindaneat  @thunderingbats  @felicityofbakerstreet @takacsgram @mischiefmanaged71 @fanfictionedagain @merelyhooper @gyllord @mundaytuesday @friday18eo  @lovegood7553  @adara-wolfhart @a-djarin @farawaywasteland @sky-writes-stuff @fuckinglittlekitten @katyasrussianaccent @agent-jbarnes  @neoarchipelago @pattispunk @kpopnena @purebloodwitch @spookyconsultingcriminal @msmarvelwrites @professorrw @lazyradeecal @captainrexstan @notyourfuckingbusinesss

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged, or if I forgot to tag you for some reason! :)

[justnailli]

eunhoon's love and hate relationship

clip #1

back in i-land, sunoo got voted out to go to the ground and eunji was really upset to separate from him. she's just trying really hard to hold her tears but when sunoo disappeared out of her sight, those tears suddenly dropped continuously. sunghoon noticed that and hugged eunji.

"it's fine, sunoo will definitely come back. don't worry." sunghoon said then patted her back.

clip #2

when sunghoon was struggling at his facial expressions for chamber 5, eunji helped him and practiced together. they will just look at each other then smile cutely to check if it's natural looking.

"hahaha! that's good! your smile improved a lot!" eunji complimented him.

"thanks. i'll just look at you in order to smile like this."

clip #3

in i-land episode 12, when they were reading the letters given from their parents, sunghoon cried which is unusual and it made eunji tear up a little. she gave sunghoon a side hug to comfort him.

clip #4

eunji and sunghoon were always teammates in every test in i-land and sunghoon noticed that on their concept test in i-land.

"wait, why are we always in the same team?" sunghoon asked that made her think about it.

"oh, you're right. it's unfortunate." eunji teased him.

clip #5

"i actually don't like the idea of being the 02z leader because i already have three kids taking care of and i don't want to have another." eunji said in their 02 line coming of age vlive.

the members reacted to her by laughing and saying that they will vote for her despite of what she'd said.

"just don't vote for sunghoon, please. thank you!" eunji bowed and smiled. her members chuckled and take a glance on sunghoon who's currently looking at eunji.

"ya." sunghoon sternly said to her.

"what?" she fights back.

clip #6

"oh, you look good today." sunghoon complimented eunji for her style at their fever mv.

eunji smiled widely after receiving his compliment. "thank you."

"what about me? won't you compliment me back? i look great today." sunghoon stated making eunji to drop her.

"did you just praised me to give you back a compliment?" eunji shook her head.

clip #7

when they had their second offline fansign and taking their group photo, eunji suddenly stumbled beside sunghoon but he immediately hold her waist and asked if she's alright. the fans started screaming on what they've witnessed.

"eunji-ssi, you're so clumsy." sunghoon said while his mic are on.

clip #8

"it doesn't count, we're just at the same age!" sunghoon arguing with 02z when eunji jokingly said that sunghoon can't be the leader of their unit because he's the maknae.

"it does! we breathed air more than you for several months!" eunji fired back. jake and jay just find them funny.

clip #9

on jay's birthday vlive, eunji was wearing dress that time. she's just using a sofa pillow to cover her legs but it still can be seen that made her a bit uncomfortable. sunghoon saw her then take off his blazer to give it to eunji. she smiled widely and thanked him.

"don't smile like that, it's creeping me out." he said.

clip #10

"why is your hand so pretty?" in enter-key, eunji was holding sunghoon's hands to check it out.

"i was born with that." sunghoon answered.

she ignored him and continue to look at his hands. "it's also two times bigger than mine."

they compared each other's hands for a moment. "this feels like on a kdrama, when the main leads are comparing their hands then the other one will intertwine his hands to her." eunji chuckled.

sunghoon intertwined his hands with eunji and said, "like this?"

clip #11

in sunghoon and eunji's vlive, they shared that they attended the same bts concert before they became a trainee.

"it was the time when i got inspired by bts sunbaenim and decided to become a kpop idol." sunghoon shared.

"oh? that concert was also the time when i got scouted on hybe." eunji said surprisingly.

"maybe it's destiny?" sunghoon read the comment from an engene.

eunji immediately shook her head. "no, it's just coincidence."

(played song in background: anti-romantic by txt)

clip #12

when enhypen got their sixth win in a music show, they had an en-core singing the tamed-dashed. sunghoon was accidentally ignored by heeseung and sunoo about piggy back ride. eunji saw that and chuckled while walking to sunghoon. she asked him to ride on his back and sunghoon instantly did it. they look so happy together while laughing and giggling.

[tiedyemillenialbullshit]

Nightmare

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Avenger Reader Word Count: 3,431 Summary: Your best friend finally comes to visit the compound after you join the Avengers. What starts out as a fun night out, quickly turns dire for you and Bucky. Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Feelings, Mentions of Alcohol and Drugs, PTSD/Nightmares, swearing

“AHHHH Y/N!!” You hear her before you see your best friend running towards you, not a care in the world that your entire team has also turned around to watch you two galavant towards each other like long lost sisters.

You catch Sarah in your arms and spin her around.

“Oh my god, I can’t believe you’re FINALLY HERE! And you’re early! Holy shit like I can’t believe you’re finally here in New York!! Let me introduce you to the team!” You grab her arm after she starts to show hesitance in meeting the Avengers all at once.

“Are you sure they have time? I don’t want to be a bother,” she says sheepishly.

“Oh my god Sarah, I talk about you all the time! They’re just as excited to meet you, come on.” You both walk towards the team still staring at you both near the entrance to the compound doing a quick debrief of a not-so-successful mission the day before.

“Guys, this is Sarah. Sarah this is-“ she cuts you off. “I know who you guys all are. It’s so nice to meet you! I’ll stay out of the way, I promise.” Everyone grins and introduces themselves to your best friend.

Nat smiles at you both, “On the contrary, you’re coming out with us tonight! No if’s, and’s or but’s”

Sarah seems to suddenly catch a second wind from her long flight and lets out a squeal of excitement.

You’re the newest to the “official” team, even though Steve and Fury had been trying to recruit you for years. You didn’t like the idea of the world knowing about your skill set and preferred to live a quiet life back in California. Ever since moving here, you’ve felt like maybe you weren’t home yet. Everyone was so nice and welcoming, but you missed your little house hidden in the outskirts of the National Parks in California. You missed the sun, the familiar smell of your patch of paradise and the general sense of room back home. Most importantly, you missed Sarah.

You were reluctant to invite her out to New York at first, but now that things seemed to be going smoothly, you sent for her via a car and private jet thanks to one Mr. Tony Stark. He was more than happy to help you out given your fresh and maybe sometimes bumpy arrival to the Avengers.

As everyone filed inside to break away before the evening festivities, Bucky caught your arm.

After holding you back for a second he said, “Hey, I can totally hang back tonight if you’d rather just be with Sarah and the team.”

You realize what he’s getting at. He also has some lack of feeling settled at the compound. It was something you bonded over when you first arrived. You both had similar pasts, even though they were at the same time lightyears apart.

“Buck, no. I think we’re all going out to Bleaker’s tonight! What’s a better way to get to know the team than bowling, beer, smoking inside, beer, old arcade games, more beer and maybe dancing?!”

Bucky gives you a quick glare out the corner of his eye before wrapping his metal arm around your shoulders to lead you inside after everyone.

“Fiiiiiiine, but I can’t promise I’ll behave.” You giggle, but suddenly feel a couple sets of eyes on you.

“And what do we have here?,” Tony asks with a smirk across his mouth. Sarah seems to be in the middle of an engaging conversation with Steve, so you don’t seem to have an easy out of this encounter. Bucky quickly drops his arm and steps a foot away from you.

“Uh, nothing. Y/N just seemed like maybe she wasn’t feeling well.”

“But I’m fine so here we are - have you seen Sam? Nat? Wanda? I told them we should be ready in a few hours and I jus-“

“Oh for Christ’s sake guys, your secret is safe with me,” Tony winks at you knowingly. You decide to take that as the end of the conversation and rush over to join Sarah.

“So! You have muscles.” Sarah says clearly at a loss of words looking at Steve in a tight shirt.

You and Bucky share a giggle, but pull Sarah away and save her from further embarrassment.

“What the fuck did I just say?” Sarah is about as red as a tomato as you drag her upstairs away from the awkward encounter. Steve looked a little flustered as well, which you file away in the back of your brain.

“Who cares! Let’s catch up and get ready for tonight.” Sarah is your best friend for a reason. Even though it had been 6 months since you last saw each other, it was like it was yesterday. You two spend the next few hours catching up, gossiping about each other’s families, friends, ex-boyfriends, etc.

“So! How are we doing in the boi department?” You turn around and face Sarah at the inquisitive tone in her question.

“What’s that supposed to mean? I’m good, I’m… I’m doing great, I mean yeah I’m good. WHY?” You’re stuttering and you don’t even care it’s obvious you’re blushing.

“Oh, you know. I mean, I’ve only recently met a few super soldiers, but I do think I can tell the there’s a spark between one and someone else.” Sarah so wants you to spill the tea but you promised Bucky you’d keep it quiet.

“Let’s just say things are developing and whatever you’d like to take from that you may.” You both launch into a giggle fit of her guessing and you denying certain aspects of Bucky Barnes.

When Wanda wanders into your room a few hours later, she starts laughing at what she sees. “You know you two are wearing like the same thing, right?” Exchanging confused looks at each other, you reply with a “AND?!”

Sam follows in with a smirk of his own. You’re bracing for his jokes but instead says “damn, OKAY! Everyone’s looking sharp tonight. Y/N, have you seen our bionic man around? Is he coming? He better come out tonight or I swear to…”

After Sam leaves to go find Bucky, the three of you wander down to find Nat and start the evening off with a shot or two. You aren’t much of a drinker, so one is enough for you. You much rather enjoy the company of your friend Mary Jane.

The team is getting silly with each other in the kitchen and quickly the room is filled with people yelling at each other to pregame harder, laughing when Nat’s little sister challenges Sam to a chugging contest and wins.

You feel a large hand at the small of your back. You can smell his cologne and know who it is immediately.

“Well don’t you look dashing tonight Sargent Barnes.” You lean in on impulse but stop yourself just as the girls turn around to see who you’re talking to.

“I was just going to say the same thing to you, sweets.” He mumbles in your ear before removing his hand and walking over to Sam.

The alcohol decides to hit you then, leaving you feeling empty that he’s not standing next to you anymore. Neither of you had wanted to have the “conversation” but you knew you were head over heels for him.

“CABS ARE HERE” screams Sam.

“Sam. For the love of God, stop watching Jersey Shore.” Natasha jokes to him.

At the same time Steve screams, “I understood that reference!” Eye rolls are exchanged as you all make your way outside.

The atmosphere is buzzing and you’re so excited to not just be out with your team, but to also have the only bit of family you had with you as well. You finally felt at home, at peace, and were ready for a fun night out.

Bleaker’s is one of those hole-in-the-wall dive bars that from the outside seems like a hard pass, but once you’re in, there’s no other place you’d rather spend a Saturday night. It’s true it started as a bowling alley in the 60’s. That still remains. What’s newer is the arcade in the back, where the old salon used to be. Jimmy bought the space next door, blew out the wall and filled it with arcade games that sometimes work and sometimes eat your money.

After years of being regular patrons, he knows your team well. The minute you walk in, he starts up all your favorite drinks.

“Ah! My best customers! I had a feeling I’d be seeing Earth’s mightiest heroes tonight.” You line up at the bar for whatever Jimmy decides you’re drinking tonight.

“Ah yes, two vodka on the rocks for my little Russian assassins. Sam here’s your vodka red bull which I don’t think you need, but here we are. Steve! Your drink of choice: an Old Style. Wanda, a cosmo for my favorite witch. And who do we have here, Y/N?”

You’re already both in hysterics at the old man behind the bar giving everybody a hard time. “Jimmy, this is my best friend Sarah. She’s visiting from California for a few days.”

“And whatever the lady wants can be put on my tab…” Steve butts in. Sarah immediately turns red but says “well in that case I’ll have vodka soda with lime please!”

Bucky has come up behind you and now you’re both laughing and watching the two of them stare at each other like no one else is in the room.

“Oh no, what did you do Y/N?”

“Let it play out, he’s not completely tripping over his words yet, maybe he’ll finally land a good girl.” You hush to Bucky.

Jimmy stares as well in amusement. “And you two? Your usual?”

“Yes’sir!” You shout over the growing music. Jimmy hands you each a jack and Diet Coke. You tell yourself it’s okay because it’s diet, but you know that’s a bunch of bullshit.

The other great thing about Bleaker’s? The dance floor downstairs. You always joke around that it seems like a nightclub that never closes in Amsterdam or something, but you’re serious. It could be 3 pm and sunny and you’d never know. It’s in the basement, it's always dark and the music is almost always too loud.

Usually that would gross you all out, but the energy tonight is pushing you all downstairs.

You reach back and grab Bucky’s hand not really caring who sees. It’s been months of sneaking around and either everyone knows and is playing it off like they don't or you’re really good at hiding it. Regardless, you’re over hiding. Maybe showing a little PDA tonight will get him out of his shell.

Sarah and Steve are no where in sight, assuming they’re ahead of you, you follow the team downstairs.

Minutes turn into hours. Everyone is dancing, laughing, sweating, screaming the lyrics to every song, and for a little while you can forget you’re a group of superheroes, and can just be normal 30-something year-olds.

You mostly dance with Bucky and quickly realize he’s a better dancer than you thought he would be. Those moves from the 1940’s must still be relevant in some way today, because the way he's grinding up on you and not caring if anyone sees just does something to you.

You work the room, finding Sarah, Wanda, Nat, even Steve for a song before you realize you don't see Bucky. You give it a few minutes thinking maybe he is in the bathroom. After 15 minutes though, you grab Steve’s attention and motion for him to check the bathroom while you check outside.

You race to the alley where you find Jimmy on a smoke break. “Hey Jimmy, have you seen Bucky? I can’t find him.”

“Oh yeah, doll, he took off in a cab about a half hour ago. Looked real flustered, but I didn’t want to press.”

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You thought you felt his mood shift about an hour ago, he was becoming stiff and quiet. You thought maybe he was just drinking a lot but now you’re realizing the loud music, strobe lights and base must have been triggering him.

“Ugh I’m such a bitch,” you huff as you send Steve a S.O.S text.

You: Hey, Jimmy said he just left. I'm sure he's heading home. I'm going to go find him.

Sire Captain Rogers: Go ahead. I think Sarah and I can find something to do while you find Buck. ;)

You: Yeah I’m sure you can.

You: BEHAVE. She’s my best friend.

Sire Captain Rogers: I know Y/N, don’t worry about us. Let me know when you find him.

You lock your phone and hop in a cab back to the compound.

No one is up or around when you enter through the front. The kitchen has been cleaned up, the dishes done. Probably thanks to THURSDAY, Tony’s beta bot for “cleaning up after you assholes trash the place.”

You smirk and head for the elevators. Heading straight to Bucky’s room, you can tell his light is on but something seems off. You don’t like to use your powers on friends or in the compound, but you close your eyes and reach out with your mind to find his aura. Your eyes snap open. You don’t sense him, you just see red.

Taking this as a good excuse to break into a friend’s room, you burst into the room to find it in disarray. Everything is toppled over, broken glass is on the floor, the bathroom light is on, but all you can see is his blood on the door and the floor. You’re panicked, trying to piece together what happened.

Again, you close your eyes and reach out for the familiar energy of Bucky. You find him in your room on the floor.

“What the fuck?,” you mumble and sprint up the stairs to your apartment. You shoot Steve a text on your way up.

You: Found him, looks like a bad one. I’ll let you know if I need you.

Sir Captain Rogers: Thanks Y/N. I’m just a call away, let me know if you need anything. Night.

Upon entering, you sense he’s in distress. His heart rate is elevated, he’s incredibly sweaty and is panting like a dog.

“Bucky? Buck, it’s me, it’s Y/N.”

Bucky stirs and jumps into a defensive standing position quicker than you can blink. You flip the lights on with a “BABE. Baaabe, it’s me. It’s okay, you’re safe. We’re in the compound. You had a nightmare.”

Bucky’s eyes are wide and alarmed, but you can tell the moment he recognizes you.

Rushing over to you, he takes you into a big hug. “Oh my god. What happened? Are you okay, did I hurt you?”

“No Bucky, no I just found you a minute ago. You had another bad one, what do you need me to do right now for you?”

Bucky stands back and rubs his swollen eyes. “I need to shower, can you help me?”

Typically, this is where it gets exciting, but you knew what he means. Water grounds him. He doesn’t feel like he’s falling in water. It helps him visualize the stress washing off of him.

You help him strip and get in the shower, but before you can even take his jeans off, he jumps in and pulls you in with him. You realize how desperate he is for whatever he’s feeling to pass and your heart sinks.

You’re both standing there, almost fully clothed holding each other. This is the worst you’ve seen him in a long time.

“I’m so sorry if I ruined your night, Y/N. The base sounded like the train, the lights looked like the machine they used on me, what the fuck.”

You aren’t sure what to do so you decide to sit on the ground and pull him down with you. You position yourself behind him so his back is in your chest. Even though he’s so much larger than you, he sinks down enough for you to reach over his shoulders and hold him.

“It’s okay Barnes, just breathe with me. You’re safe. You’re with me, and we’re home. Nobody is going to touch you. I’ve got you, you won’t fall.”

You take in deep breaths so he can match your breathing.

After about 45 minutes, the hot water is out in the tank. Bucky sits forward and turns towards you. You want him to lead right now, so you don’t say anything. Neither does he, but the look in his eyes are telling you something about tonight is different.

With a soft smile on your lips, you cup his cheek until he is really looking at you. “Hun, let’s go lay down, ya? Let me help get you dried off.” Bucky hates when you fuss over him, so when he doesn’t argue, you know to be extra gentle with him.

After getting him up and out of the shower, you think skin-to-skin contact doesn’t seem sexual right now, it feels intimate in a grounding sense, and you know that’s exactly what he needs right now. Bucky seems dazed, almost like he got hit too hard in the head. You yourself are of course a tad over-served, and are quickly realizing the adrenaline of this entire situation is rubbing off.

You get Bucky into bed and turn to make sure his phone is plugged in and that he has a glass of water, but he grabs your wrist before you can move away. “Just leave it, it’s fine.”

“Buck, just let me-“ he grabs your wrist harder.

“Y/N. Please just stay here. Please.”

The entire time you’ve been together, he’s done a lot of things but begging you for anything is not one of them. Suddenly the phone and whatever hell else you were doing doesn’t seem important anymore.

You climb into your usual spot next to him and decide maybe you’ll try to get him to open up. The moment the back of your head hits the pillow, Bucky is facing you. His pleading eyes seem like they want to tell you everything that’s going on in his head, but you know pushing him to talk will just make the nightmares come flooding back too soon.

Instead, you decide to lay on your back and pull him to lay on your chest.

“Just listen to my heart beat, Bucky.” You hear him take a deep breath and settle into your chest.

You start and stop yourself from trying to say something comforting. You’re terrified to say the wrong thing at such a crucial moment. Typically these bad episodes are reserved for a Steve house call. You realize as he’s settling into a comfortable position that he hasn’t asked you to call Steve yet. Bucky trusts you in a way you didn’t realize until now.

You don’t know when, but you start humming the first calming song that comes in your head.

I’ll be seeing you In all the old familiar places That this heart of mine embraces All day through

Bucky picks his head up to look at you. Oh fuck.

“Where did you hear that song?,” he says to you with shiny eyes.

“You sing it all the time when you’re concentrating. I looked it up and added it to my ‘bath time/relax’ playlist. I didn't know Billie Holliday was a favorite of yours."

Bucky was looking at you like maybe this was the first time he saw you, like really saw you. “My mom used to sing that around the house when she was missing my dad.”

“Oh I’m so sorry, I didn’t know. I can hum a diff-“ you’re cut off with the most searing kiss Bucky has ever given you. He’s crying when he pulls back to look at you again. “Will you keep singing it?”

In that small cafe The park across the way The children's carousel That chestnut tree, the wishing well

By the time you finish the second verse, he has physically relaxed in your arms. You continue rubbing your hand up and down his back and shoulder, stopping to play with his long hair every once in a while.

I'll be seeing you In every lovely summer's day In every thing that's light and gay I'll always think of you that way

“I forgot how much I love hearing this song sung around me.” Bucky whispers so quietly you almost miss it.

I'll find you in the morning sun And when the night is new I'll be looking at the moon But I'll be seeing you…

You stop your caressing when you feel him sit up on one arm.

He leans down to kiss you but stops short to whisper “I love you Y/N.” You kiss him back and wrap your arms around his shoulders, and when you say “I love you too, Bucky,” you’ve never been more sure of something in your life.

[mememanturner]

My Mistakes Were Made for You (Part 2)

Alex Turner x reader

Part 2/4?

Part 1

Summary: After Alex finds out, you two decide to give each other some space. Soon after, you find yourself alone on your birthday, and receive an unexpected visit.

warnings: light reference to sex, cheating (kinda), idk you're both sad in this one

word count: 2978

A/N: So...I wasn't really sure how to continue this so I've decided to take inspiration from the same song I used as the title for this fic (which wasn't the original plan). I hope to make it into a 4 part fic. I also apologize for any cringy or stiff sections, I wrote this part in a hurry cause I wantede to give y'all something. And seeing as I don't know Alex personally, his character might not be completely accurate throughout this so I improvise. Please bare with me. Thank you to everyone who's actually reading this and (hopefully) enjoying it <3 hope you like.

Who would have ever thought that you’d be spending your birthday in a hotel room (a fancy one, but a hotel room nonetheless), alone, with nothing but a couple cards, sweets and some texts here and there from friends wishing you “good health and an amazing day”. At least one part of that was true. You certainly didn’t expect it, and it was worse than you could have imagined. You had been actively looking forward to spending your birthday this year with Alex, and maybe a nice night out with him and Miles and a couple other friends, but certainly not a night by yourself, in a random, overpriced LA hotel. It sucked. And you’d already cried, so there was no point in wallowing around in self pity, wishing for things to be different. Tears and wishes wouldn't be enough to fix what had happened.

To be honest, you weren’t even entirely sure what went down after you’d left. You and Alex shared a couple exchanges that morning, exchanges that weren’t governed purely by emotion, and decided that it would indeed be best if you gave each other some space. This sucked for two reasons. One, well, that one is pretty obvious. You and your boyfriend would be on what the media calls “a break”, whose definition never quite lines up in the minds of both parties, which made you absolutely miserable (not to mention, caused you a decent amount of anxiety). And two: you had literally just moved into Alex’s place about a month ago. Talk about good timing. Anyhow though, the birthday thing had slipped your mind until about a week before today, which happened to be the day you booked your hotel and “moved out” of Alex’s. You didn’t take everything because you both knew this wasn’t the end of your relationship, and Alex would never kick you out if you had nowhere else to go, but it definitely hurt when you packed up your part of his room. It hurt when you walked out the front door. It hurt when you turned around with tears running down your face and saw a similar phenomenon happening with Alex (Do Me A Favor anyone??). It hurt the most when you got into the taxi, looked back, and saw the front steps empty.

There was still a little bit of hope left inside of you that things could and would go back to normal, but that same hope had been torturing you for the whole of today, telling you that maybe, just maybe Alex would call or text or even-

A knock at the door startles you out of your rumination. You will yourself to think it’s room service who got the wrong door but you can’t completely kick the thought of Alex showing up out of your head. As you open the door, you can’t help but gape slightly as you feel yourself release a shaky breath.

“Alex…”

“Happy Birthday.” He says, a slight smile tugging on his lips as he hands you a black velvet box tied up with a black ribbon. “Jus’ a little somefing.” His eyes travel to yours as he hands you the box.

“Alex… you really didn’t have to.” You say, gently taking it from him, your hands trembling as you do so. You could only assume how much convincing it took for your boyfriend to choose to show up here. Yet here he was. “Thank you. It means a lot.”

“Couldn’t miss ye birthday, could I?” He says, throwing you that cheeky look with his eyes that he always does, one eyebrow raised in question. This elicits a smile from you because how could you not.

“Want me to open it now?” You question, looking down at the lovely little thing in your hands, running your finger over the soft material. You always did like the feeling of velvet. It reminded you of a mellow, quiet summer’s night with a clear sky and a crescent moon. Laying down on a picnic blanket, pointing out the limited amount of constellations you know, the sound of cricket chirps filling your ears, that sweet smell of grass and dampness wafting by in a warm breeze. It was comforting. And you’d told Alex this. And ever since then he’d gotten you gifts in velvet boxes. You still had most of them. He’d always try to change the colour up too, but he knew black was your favourite. You knew this wasn’t an apology, you knew things weren’t all of a sudden back to normal, but these small moments of normalcy were enough to keep you looking forward instead of back. And he’d remembered.

“Naw, you don’t ‘ave to now. Just thought I should, erm…” He paused, taking a breath. You watched him brush his hand through his hair, slicking it back. His gaze directed at the floor. “Jus’ thought I should bring you something. It’s nothing big or anyfing, jus’ a small gift… ”

“Thank you, Alex.” You say reaching out to put your hand on his arm. You smile as he looks back up at you, reacting to your touch. His other arm staying suspended behind his head. He always struggled to come up with the right words to use when he was nervous. He never knew how to say what he wanted to. It was a little ironic when you thought about it, seeing as he was a songwriter and all (despite not really liking the term), but spoken words didn’t sound the same without a soundtrack behind them. So actions would have to do, hence the gift.

“Right well…” He lowers his arm and drags it lightly across the bottom of his face. You pull your hand away and sigh. Different. “I guess I should be off then.” He says, making eye contact, almost asking if…

“You can stay, er, do you want to come in for a bit?” You ask tentatively, shifting your weight slightly from one foot to the other.

“I don’t want to intrude...” You laugh softly at his words.

“Alex please, I’ve been sitting alone in this hotel room for the entirety of today, the last thing you’d be doing by coming in is intruding. Come on, lemme grab your jacket.” You say, the smile on your face widening, gesturing for him to step in as you open the door wider. He looks at you for a moment before stepping inside and shrugging off his jacket for you to hang in the closet. You turn back to him to find his face twisted in a concerned expression, not pity though, Alex wasn’t one for that, but rather genuine concern and… sadness? “What?” You ask, maintaining his gaze.

“You were ‘ere alone for the day?” He asks tenderly, as if it was the worst news he’d heard in ages. You felt a weird combination of emotions at his question but more so at his tone. He really seemed upset by it. Now, it wasn’t a secret that Alex himself didn’t quite like birthdays, particularly opening gifts in front of others (hence why he never forces anyone to open his gifts right away), but he always tried to make the occasion as enjoyable as possible for himself and others. That included spending time with those you cared about. So it made sense that he was taken aback by the fact that you had literally spent the day on your own. And it made sense that you felt a sort of sting in your heart when you heard his voice. You appreciated his concern, there was no doubt. However what didn’t quite make sense was the lurking feeling of anger, perhaps betrayal, that you felt regarding that same question. What did he expect? You had just moved in with him into a completely unfamiliar area (you and Alex had met on tour, therefore you weren’t from LA) and so the only people you knew were Alex’s friends. You had virtually no one here. Plus, it’s not like you expected to be alone today. You huffed at his question, but swallowed the frustration not wanting to worsen the already growing tension.

“Well, I didn’t have too much of a choice, Al.” You responded as calmly as you could, and offered him that awkward smile you do where your lips sort of tighten inwards in a smile. You knew he still detected that small bit of annoyance in your voice as you answered.

“Right. Sorry.” He said, his eyes finding interest in the floor once more.

“Hey.” You said gently. His eyes found his way to your face. “Sorry, it’s just been a weird day. But no apologies tonight, okay? That’s not what you came here for and... I don't think either of us are quite ready for one yet. Not truthfully.” You said, your voice getting quieter with the last bit. His only response was a nod, but you knew he felt relieved. “Come. Sit.” You waved your hand around the bland room, giving him the choice of table or couch as a seating arrangement. He gravitated towards the table and sat, you followed close behind. “Want anything to drink? I’ve really only got beer but I can always order some room service or whatever.” You suggest.

“I fink a beer’ll do, thanks… ” He replied, brushing his hand through his hair once again. You responded with a quiet “sure” and walked to the kitchen to grab the drinks. It’s not that the interaction was awkward or anything, it just felt foreign and fragile. As if one wrong word or gesture could send it all crashing down again. After all that time with him, and here you were, not even able to tell him how much he means to you. You shook the feeling away and grabbed an opener from the counter, with two bottles in hand. You hear Alex let out a loud sigh from the living area as you walk towards it, coming back to find him with his head in his hands.

“Al?”

He looked up with jerk of his head, not having heard you come back.

“ ‘M alright.” He gave you a small smile, not quite reaching his eyes, but you didn’t want to push. Not tonight.

You sat and passed him his beer, handing him the opener along with it. The two of you shared a silence whilst opening the bottles and taking a couple sips. Alex’s voice broke the silence after a little while.

“I guess we should make a toast then.” He said, raising his beer towards you. You sent him a small, quizzical look. “Your birthday.”

“Right.” That’s the only reason you’re here, you wanted to say. But instead you smiled, as genuinely as your feelings would allow, and clinked your bottle to his.

“To you.” He said, his tone quiet. Your tone matched his as you acknowledged the gesture:

“Thank you, Alex.”

Light conversation was shared between the two of you, the topic never touching on how Alex’s songwriting and recording was going, never nearing Miles and the subject of the two of you was intently avoided. It wasn’t a bad conversation, in fact you were really glad to talk to Alex after all this time, it just didn’t really feel natural. Not like it used to. And it won’t. That was what you kept trying to remind yourself as the evening progressed, even though it hurt every time.

“I should probably get goin’ soon.” Alex said, making a remark on the time. It was getting late, nearing 8pm. “ ‘ve still got to go to the studio for somefing.” He said. You were a little stunned at the fact that he’d decided to mention the studio at all, but again, you didn’t want to push it.

“Yeah for sure, it’s definitely getting late. I don’t want to keep you… or anyone, waiting.” But you couldn’t help yourself. Alex turned to you at those words, a knowing look on his face. He paused for a moment before continuing.

“Miles ‘n I talked… It’s alright. We’re okay. He said you two talked. And that you’re okay.” The pauses between his words gave you indication of how carefully he was trying to pick his words. “I jus’... I need a little more time. The music, it’s going well, you know? Just some more time would be…would be good. Sufficient.”

“Sure, Alex. I’m glad.” You say as he looks at you. “About the music.” About Miles. He nods, knowing what you wanted to add but didn’t. He gets his coat out of where you had hung it in the closet, quickly putting it on in a messy fashion, his arm getting stuck in the sleeve in the process. It made you smile a little as he struggled and he let out a small chuckle, relieving some of the tension in the air. Light. Genuine. Real.

You exchanged a couple words of goodbyes and you thanked Alex for stopping by to see you, telling him again how much it meant to you and for the gift. He brushed it off, as he always does with these things, as it being a necessity and “how could he not” but you knew it had taken him a lot of strength to see you, and you knew he appreciated your gratitude.

“Bye Alex.” You waved to him as he walked from your doorway to the elevator, and stepped in to take the ride down to the lobby. You closed the hotel door with a small click as your heart simultaneously sank to the bottom of your chest with a hard thud. What the fuck just happened.

You weren’t really sure. Alex had come to see you, which meant he still cared enough. I mean, of course he cared, but you knew how much of a strain that night had put on your relationship. Therefore, you had nearly convinced yourself that he didn’t really care after all. And tonight reminded you that that notion stemmed purely from sadness and insecurity on your part. But at the same time, how were you supposed to go from here. Stay friends? But would you have to go back home? Would you truly have to pack everything up from Alex’s and go home? The thoughts circled in your mind as you stayed pressed up against the door, not noticing the tears that were now rolling down your face.

“Fuck this, we are not crying again today.” You said as you turned to face your empty room, wiping away the wetness with the back of your hand. You took a deep breath and looked around, trying to picture what you and Alex had looked like sitting at the table just some moments ago. You probably looked like what you did when the two of you first met. Shy, not talking about anything particularly important, content. And definitely not nearly as touchy as you two became as you both got to know each other. A small laugh escapes your lips as you think back to that progression. The feeling of Alex’s hands around your waist, your shoulders, in your hair, running along your back… anywhere really. He never passed up the chance to show the world that you were his.

Your reminiscing comes to an end when you spot Alex’s sunglasses on the table. Shit, he forgot. Would he still be down in the lobby? Maybe in his car, you could still catch him if you ran fast enough. But you were on a high level of the hotel so the elevator would take forever and the stairs would be only slightly more effective. You sighed, walking over to the table and picking them up, running your hands over the silver metal frame. Only Alex would carry sunglasses around with him in the evening. Only Alex.

***

Alex sat in his car, waiting. For what, he wasn’t entirely sure. Perhaps he was waiting for himself to regain his breath. For his heart to slow down. For his hands to stop shaking. For his head to think clearly for the first time today. He didn’t know if it had been a good idea to go see you, let alone sit inside with you and talk. Or mention Miles, or the music. But he missed you. God, he missed you so much. There was just still a part of him that couldn’t accept what had happened, and that wouldn’t let him trust you again. Not yet, anyway. And he hated that. He wanted things to just go back to normal, with everyone. The only thing keeping him sane right now was the music. They were so close to being done with the album, and he just needed a big win. He needed one thing to go right. Something to let him know that things would be okay. That they would be okay between you and him. Miles and Alex, they were alright, he wasn’t lying when he had told you that. They had talked, and taken some time apart too, but things soon started to settle back into their own rhythm. The rhythm they knew all too well and couldn’t help but follow. I mean, it was Miles. It felt as if nothing could come between them, especially not when they were making music. He was mostly worried about what it meant for you. He’d hoped that bringing you a gift would show you that he still wanted you, and that he still thought about you and that he hadn’t forgotten. He’d hoped you would let him know that you understood. That he just needed a little more time and things would be okay again. And as he pulled away in his sleek sedan, he kept his eyes on the front doors of the lobby, hoping that you would come running out with that pair of sunglasses he’d left on the table.

[iwhishtomeetinournextlife]

An anonymous lover (Part 5)

Summary : Y/N sees Sirius Black running away after a particularly rough letter from his mother. She wants to cheer him up and decide to send him a letter, anymously, she knows how much he hates her house.

Warnings : Slytherin!Reader, female!reader, angst, arguing, not proof read

Word count : 2.2k

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - You're here - Part 6 - Part 7

English is not my first language, sorry if there is any mistakes

--------------------------

It is not possible. It is a mistake. He has dream of that moment so much, he is just imagining things now.

Sirius was in his dorm, laying down, looking at the stars on the canopy of his bed. He has stuck all the enveloppe he had receive decored with stars there, so he could see the sky before falling asleep, this had helped him to sleep better for the past few weeks.

But even the soothing looks of the stars could not help him calm his mind, he simply could not believe the person he was exchanging letters with, for now soon to be two months, was a slytherin. He knows her house shouldn’t be important, that no matter what she had helped him in so many ways, but he had developped such a hated for this house, he could simply not accept it.

He didn’t dare to compare the handwriting, fearing it would be indeed true, but after a few minutes he finally decided to look, he had to be sure, he couldn’t stay in the mystery like that for much longer.

He took the notes Y/N gave to him and the latest letter, the one he got today, it was a warming letter, she was talking about how she used to climb trees with her brother when she was a kid but never dared to go high, and how all the assignment was stressing her out and that writing to him helps her feeling better. Sirius felt like shit reading the lines.

He finally compare the two handwriting and threw his head back when they were the same. All the memories of the letter who were a source of joyed turned into a taste of disgust in the back of his tongue. What was before a blessing to be able to read those impossible lines became a curse. He hated it.

He hated how much of an impact her being a slytherin had on him, he didn’t want to deal with the emotion and decided to burry it deep inside of him. He didn’t copy the notes Y/N gave him and used Remus’ instead, he didn’t go to supper that evening, he didn’t respond to the letter like usual, and he didn’t sleep that night.

---------------------------------

Y/N was a bit surprise to not have any letters from Sirius that night, she had not see him in the Great Hall either, that got her a bit worried. She tried to reassure herself, he did say he had difficulties with that specific potion so he was probably studying.

She laughed at that idea, she had never seen him study before, clever and smart Sirius. Always finding ways out of situation, always the right answer in class if he bothered participating. The two month were over soon she realised and he had still to find her. She felt a bit of dispointment but also a satisfaction of winning the bet. She blushed when she remembered Sirius had promised a date if he find her before. Would he still wants to ask her if the bet  was over ?

She thought for a moment, she hoped he would, she was still a bit scared to reveal herself, but she was confident everything would go alright if she did. After all, they had spend so much time sharing their hearts, it couldn’t desappear that easily, right ?

The next day she searched for him in the crowd and she felt her stomach flip, he looked livid, her first thought went to his mother, has she send another letter ? She felt so bad for him, she just wanted to hold him in her arms and tells him everything would be alright because he was capable of anything.

When their eyes met, Sirius quickly looked away, he didn’t want to see her, didn’t want to think of all the things happening in his head and she was only making things worse. Y/N didn’t know what to think of that, she decided to let him his space, he could always write to her if he needed her help.

But Y/N’s concern only got worse, it was Remus who gave her back her notes, and when she asked if Sirius was ok, he just nodded and said he will be alright. He completly ignore her in class, and wierdly enough he seemed to look at her way more often than before but always looked away when she noticed him.

She send a little message, a very short one, “Are you ok ? I’m worried”, all she was able to write down, she felt a weight in her stomach getting heavier every day and sharp glass in her throat forbbiding her to talk.

Those feeling only got worse when Sirius only responded with “I know who you are. Astronomy tower, 11PM, tomorrow” Y/N has never sweat that much in her entire life.

-----------------------

The walk from the dungeon to the astronomy tower was a long walk, and she was very careful to not get caught by anyone patrolling the corridors, she was trembling like a leaf in the wind. Each step getting heavier. But when she finally arrived, he was there, looking at the window, he turned to her when he heard someone enter.

For a solid second they just stand there, looking at eachother, not daring to say a word, but after a few moment it Y/N who spoke. “So... You know who I am”

“Yeah..”, his eyes looked in the void, he didn’t know what to do, he felt completly paralized. “Well.. What now ?” she didn’t dare to look a him either. “I don’t know”

Y/N froze for a moment, he didn’t know ? He is the one who asked her to come here ! After all they shared to one another, all the words exchanged, all those freaking kisses and hugs that’s all he had to say ? What for ? “Is it because I’m a slytherin ?”

Sirius didn’t answer for a moment but that spoke for itself, Y/N scoffed, tears running down her cheeks. “Of course” Sirius frowned “What do you mean by that ?”

“Of FUCKING course the great Sirius Black can’t deal with the fact he befriended a slytherin, how could have i been this stupid to think he could get over his own prejudice on a house he knows nothing about” Sirius stood from the window seat and walked to her visibly pissed “I know enough ‘bout yer stupid house to know t’s just a bunch a soon to be death eaters !”

Y/N open her mouth, completly shocked “Death eater ? Death. Eaters ? What do you even know about it ? Have you even try to talk to-” “Actually, yes, I did ! And mind ya all those I have talked to are nothing but monsters, so I prefer keep you and your kind away from me as much as possible”

Heavy tears were falling, how could he say that ? Her voice were cracking “Me and my kind ?! Do I look like a monster to you ?” Sirius opened and closed his mouth a few times “Maybe, yeah ! I know nothing about you !”

“NOTHING ?! I OPEN MY HEART TO YOU AND SERVED IT ON A GOLDEN PLATE !”

“WELL I DON’T WANT IT ! YOUR PEOPLE ARE NOTHING BUT A SHAME TO THESE SCHOOL, I DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW YOU ARE LET STUDYING HERE !  NOTHING BUT ABOMINATIONS ! YOU WILL JU-”

“MAY I KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE ?!”

Y/N and Sirius froze, Professor McGonagall and prefect were standing at the door, arms crossed, a severe look on her face. “So ? I’m waiting”. Both the students were heads down, ashamed of being caught like four years old. It is Sirius who answered “Nothing Professor", she frowned when she saw the tears Y/N was quickly swipping away and her puffy eyes. “Well I am sure you will gladly do nothing at your detention tomorow after class”

“Yes Professor” have they replied in union, “Now, I believe you both know the way back to your dorm ? Go Miss Y/L/N, accompagny her Mister Collins, and it better not happen again” Y/N nod, unable to say another word and got out, following Collins. “Follow me Mister Black”, Sirius followed without a word.

After a few minutes, when they were starting to climb the moving stairs back to the Gryffindor commun room, she spoke, “I will not hide to you that I am quite desappointed Mister Black”, he frowned but before he could they anything, McGonagall added “I heard enough of your conversation to know what was happening, Mister Black” He felt his blood running out his face, probably leaving whiter than snow. “Professor I-”

“I don’t need your explainations, what you have said to Miss Y/L/N is simply intolarable, I thought better of you” Sirius was now red of shame, he didn’t know what to say, actually, he already regretted every words, he regretted them the second they have left his lips. “I can understand your disfavour toward the slytherin, I know your difficult relationship with your family and the fact they were all from this house, but I need you to understand that not all slytherin are bad people, the same way not all people who were from gryffindor turned out to be good people. Do you understand ?” Sirius nodded “I want you to think about it, goodnight Mister Black”

Sirius said goodbye and enter the common room before going to his shared dorm, he was not surprise to see that none of the marauders were sleeping. Sirius put the map he had used to sneek out in James drawer, his friend spoke “Where were you ?”

He didn’t answered at first, letting himself flopped on his bed, face first and groaning into his pillow. His friends looked at each other, worried, “Were you with a girl ?”, that only made him groaned louder. “C’mon, talk t’ us” said Remus, who stood up to sat beside his friend.

Sirius didn’t said anything for a moment, he was gnaw with guilt, he wanted all he said back, when he remember you crying his chest tighten, it was his fault if those tears were rolling down your cheek, if you were screaming at him, he had said such horrible thing to you but you didn’t said anything bad, you just observe a hard truth : this idiot could not go past his jugmental ass.

“The anonymous lover is Y/N”, all the marauders gasped together and hurried beside on his bed. “So ? What happenned ? You should be through the roof !” Sirius turned around, “I knew it for ‘ few days now”, James widen his eyes “ ‘nd you did tell us ?!”

Sirius grimaced “I know ! ‘m sorry ! ‘t just...” Remus frowned, something bad happened. “Pads, what have y’ done ?”, he simply put a pillow on his face, groaning and speaking intelligible words. “Wha’ ?”

“I TOLD HER SLYTHERIN WERE ABOMINATIONS !” they all sat there for a moment. James finally took the pillow from Sirius and hit him as hard as he possibly could with it “You. Are. An. I. DI. OT.”

“OUCH ! Yeah, YEAH ! I know, stop hitting me !” but he didn’t stop before a few more hit. He stop and catched back his breath. “I wouldn’t like to be you” said Peter, “Yeah, no shit Worm-” -another hit from James- “What do I do now ?!”

“Wha’ ? ‘cause you want her now ?” questionned Remus, he did not approve of his friend behavior, but he assumed that since he basicly called her a monster, he must not want to be with her. He observed his friend for a moment “C’mon, tell us everythin’ “

Sirius told them everything, from how he foud out, to what McGonagall had told him, passing by the horrible things he said to Y/N and him hiding his feelings away, getting interrupt occasionly by hit from James. But then he stopped, realising something horrible. “Oh no. Oh no no no no, I’M BECOMMING MY MOM !” He put his face in his hands. “I said such horrible things to her, she didn’t deserved any of it ! How do I make her feel better ?” He sounded desperate.

James put a hand on his friend’s shoulder “You gotta show her you really regret wha’ you said”

“Maybe some gifts ?” suggested Peter.

“Nah, first you have to deal with yer slytherin hate” said Remus.

Sirius frowned “What do you mean ?”

“If you want to date a slytherin, you have to deal with your irrational hate towards all of ‘hem”

“It’s not irrational ! I have perfectly good reas-” but he stopped mid-sentence, it was the argument with Y/N all over again, he sighed, he did need to deal with that.

“Let’s sleep, it’ll be better tomorow” said James who went to his own bed, the rest nodded and did the same.

Sirius put on some pyjamas and laid there for long minutes, thinking about why he hated slytherin so much, about his family, about Y/N. About the tears he caused, he wanted to punch himself for that, he swore that night that he will do anything to put a smile on her face and never see her cry again. He knew it will be hard but he will do anythign to deserve her fogiveness.

----------------------------

@blackpinkdolan  @jentaculargums @bruxa0007 @deathkat657 @theincredibledeadlyviper @bleh-bleh-blehs @whiskeypowder @edithsvoice @weasleybeb

[mysticmeadowscamp]

hi so since last thursday , i have been volunteering at my high school’s freshman and sophomore orientations with my besties and i wanted to share some experiences that remind me of the campfire kids

(sorry in advance for long)

•there was this tiny litol freshman girl who came dressed in all pink like lolita style with HUGE heels and she was my hero

•alternatively there was another freshman with cool ass custom grunge clothes like safety pins everywhere (they cut the bottom half of their left pant leg off , ripped the top of it up and reattached it with safety pins all around and it looked fucking sick) , rips , sharpie words all over , patches , FINGERLESS GLOVES !!!

•one friend and i would greet each other every time we saw each other by going “hola mi amorrrrr”/“hey sexy”/“aiiii it’s the love of my life”/etc

•that same friend and i are very touchy (we would bonk heads or hold hands or kiss each other’s foreheads through our mask) and i think some people thought we are dating but we are not we are jus platonically whipped for each other (i lowkey have a crush on her but shhh)

•one friend would drive me to the school every morning and one morning she pulled into the little plaza thing right next to the school bc she wanted to go to the liquor store to buy gum . she exited the car and screams “WHERE IS THE LIQUOR STORE ??? WHY IS THERE A THAI RESTAURANT ??? I WAS HERE LIKE LAST WEEK” (the liquor store was replaced with a thai restaurant like 4 months ago and now we are convinced that she probably came to the thai restaurant and walked around inside it hallucinating that it was still a liquor store)

•my best friend bought us cold drinks and we screamed the words to “Somebody That I Used To Know” by Gyote together with the windows down on the way to my house bc we wanted to feel like those teenagers in movies

•on one of the days my best friend and i were like “y’know what ? we have access to a car and money , let’s go to barnes and noble” and we went and vibed and it was pog . the cashier was trying not to laugh bc my friend got litol bookmark clip thingies that are dinosaurs with glasses but i got a book about serial killers

•at lunch yesterday one of my friends was eating pickles out of one of those little plastic sauce cups ?? like just raw plain pickles ???? even though she had a whole sandwich right there that she could eat ??????????

•this friend had the audacity to judge me for liking broccoli on pizza >:(

•for a few of the days , i worked at the room that the kids would get their ID photos taken and my job was to get them separated alphabetically bc they had to get this little card thing first otherwise they couldn’t get their ID and the cards were in alphabetical order separated into 3 groups based on last name (A-D, E-L, M-Z) so i would have to shout so all the kids could hear me go “LINE UP BY LAST NAME , GET YOUR CARD THEN GO TO ROOM 64” and some kids just wouldn’t pay attention and they wouldn’t get that first card thingy which started holding up the line for photos and then everyone would complain to me as if it was my fault so i got frustrated and started screaming louder and more like ,,, angy like “LINE UP BY LAST NAME AND GET YOUR CARD , IF YOU DONT GET YOUR CARD YOU BETTER START PRAYING TO WHATEVER GOD YOU BELIEVE IN THAT I DONT FIND OUT . AFTER YOU GET YOUR CARD GO TO ROOM 64” and one of my friends started laughing and was like “YES GIRL SCREAM AT THE KIDS !! LIVE OUT MY DREAM”

•yesterday was the last day so all the volunteers did a closing activity as a group where we taped a piece of paper to our backs and anybody could write whatever compliment/comment they wanted on it anonymously and it was very sweet and some people cried it was just wholesome and nice

•one of my friends came up to me during this activity , grinned at me like >:] and immediately turned around bc he wanted me to write something like bro that was not the point of the activity but i will in fact write something

•we also played a game on the first day called “birdie and perch” where one person is the birdie and one person is the perch and basically everyone moves around the room and the birdie has to find their perch and sit on their knee and i (5’2/5’3) was the perch for this guy (5’9 , US size 16 shoes) and it was fucking chaos , he would sprint to me across the gym like his life depended on it and all you would hear is BOOM BOOM BOOM and then he would find me and come to a complete stop right in front of me and then gently sit

THAT LAST ONE IS SO FUCKIN FUNNY TO IMAGINE DHDNHDNHFDBDNHDDJ HE JUST SITS SO GENTLY DHJDDJHDJDJD

oh god these are all wonderful i love that sm GDJHDJDDK

[fallendowntherabbithole]

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(Been a while since I’ve done one of these… speaks volumes in itself. Doing this on the app & there will be spoilers—consider yourself forewarned.)

Just saw Netflix’ My Name for the 2nd time today. To say I was enamored would be an understatement; moreover, a disservice. Come to think of it, let’s leave it as alexithymia.

The grit. The gore. The rawness. The complex & 3-dimensional characters brought to life by these actors. I can’t eloquently express it other than, pure chef’s kiss.

And So Hee. Han. So. Hee. Daebak. From standing up to her high school bullies, right down to the final standoff at Liber… and every single narrative in-between.

That scene by the door where she witnessed her father’s murder.

That lucid dream sequence by the sea with locked doors.

That inner battle with her conscience slowly tipping her over the edge of morality.

That mental breakdown of uncovering the lies upon lies she’d been fed with.

That subtle & fragile disposition interspersed with sheer fervor & grit.

I haven’t seen So Hee’s other works, I mean sure, Nevertheless—but I pretty much skipped to scenes involving Jiwan & Sol, so there’s that. As Yoon Jiwoo however, I am unequivocally hooked.

The way she’s managed to pull you in a rollercoaster of emotions.

Daebek.

Though let’s be honest here, it’d be downright unfair to fangirl over just Han So Hee.

The Director. The Ensemble. The cinematography. The music. The minute & low-key quirky tidbits interwoven in the storytelling.

Some might have felt rushed but considering it was less than an hour long, 8-episode series, the production team successfully fused just enough & purposely left out plot lines for the audience’s interpretation & imagination.

Reading between the lines. Subtle hints here & there. Makes for an interesting & interactive viewing experience.

The first episode pans into certificates, medals & trophies on display chronicling how physically adept Jiwoo is—foreshadowing her fighting prowess. As each & every episode unfolds though, we bare witness to how cunning & calculating she becomes.

—Need a diversion? Uses (literal & figurative) smoking gun. Icing on the cake? Leaves & plants said gun on the scene. Killing two birds with one stone.

—Gloves? Nope. Who needs them? Jiwoo clearly doesn’t. No fingerprints on the system? Check.

—Casually looks at lawyer’s business card. Uses number to call said lawyer a few minutes thereafter.

Sure, there was that “Um. What? No.” moment where, yes, she was caught on CCTV. But I think that in itself was driven by utter nonchalance, brazen disregard & resolute resignation.

And let’s not forget Park Hee Soon’s Choi Mujin.

While he had been the baddie, you can’t help but empathize with & root for the big shot crime boss at the start.

Though under false pretenses, he took Jiwoo under his wing when nobody else would have. Mentored & created his own perfect foot soldier.

He kept a picture of him & the person who betrayed him on his desk.

His unmistakable bond he shared with Jiwoo.

Layers & layers of complexity, which we’ve barely scratched the surface of.

And then there’s Ahn Bo Hyun’s Jeon Pildo.

Unpopular opinion, but I could really care less about the injected dose of romance—the camaraderie between him & Jiwoo would’ve sufficed and the storyline could’ve gone either way; can’t be helped, I guess.

Jang Yul. Lee Hak Ju. Kim Sang Ho. The rest of the cast all came to play under Director Kim Jin Min’s vision.

And that final scene was sweet liberation.

All throughout, Jiwoo had been trapped by her relentless desire for vengeance & Choi Mujin’s influence.

I think that 3rd urn symbolizes the death of that Yoon Jiwoo. And at the end, she finally managed to break free & start anew.

Best not sleep on My Name.

[katsukisbimbo]

DDAENG

✯ pairing: hawks x reader

✯ genre: FLUFFYYDS!!

✯ summary: fan! hawks meeting his newly debuted idol crush y/n at a fansign!

✯wordcount: 2.1k+

✯warning: just swearing and hawks being thirsty <3

✯ note: this literallt came to me because i was trying to turn @hoodtoshi into a bts stan (lowkey succeeded) and i was jus like yea, thirsty hawks

-ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛--ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛--ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥

- you were nervous

- this was your first fan meet after all,, but you were still nervous

- you were only 19 and had already debuted!!

- that didn’t happen to just anyone!!

- you worked super hard to get to where you are today!! everyone knew that!!

- you sighed as your make-up artist continued to paint your lips a dark red colour

- you honestly didn’t look like yourself, but this was to keep up the whole idol image i guess

- “jinhee, how many people are outside? i’m sure only two people came to see me..” you pouted, resulting in your make-up artist to smack your cheek lightly

- “dOn’t say that you dummy! i’m sure a lot of people came to see you!” she scolded, wiping off the excess makeup on a towel

- “now get out, you’re done”

- “i don’t wanna”

- she raised a newspaper and flexed, ready to beat the fuck out of you if she heard another whisper of self-deprecation from you

- “fine! i’m going!” you grumbled, pouting at oncoming soreness of your feet from your heels

- why did idols have to wear heels anyway?

- okay no, you knew why, but sTill!! they sucked!

- you smiled as you saw the buffet table

- one little snack wouldn’t hurt

- >:)

- “keigo stop fuckign puSHING”

- “im so EXCITED!! i’m meeting THE y/n you SLUTBAG!!” keigo yelled as he shook his companion

- dabi sometimes questioned why he was still friends with keigo

- “i SEE that you asshole”

- keigo took this opportunity to punch dabi in the arm, causing dabi to retaliate, causing kEigo to retaliate, causing dAb-

- okay so

- “i’ve been in love with her ever since she debuted!! and she debuted ALONE!! a whole solo artist!! the talent!! the beauty!! i’m in love!!”

- dabi raised a brow at his friend

- “didn’t you tweet about wanting to ‘put a baby inside of her’?”

- keigo felt his cheeks heat up at the possibility of you seeing his indecent tweets about you

- what if you had seen? what if you think he’s a creep? what if you already hated him??

- keigo felt his anxiety creep onto his shoulders as he continued to overthink, not realizing that they were already next to go in

- ruh roh raggy

- keigo didn’t know anything BUT anxiety

- rip keigo we’ll miss you big daddy :,(

- “please come in, please don’t shout”

- whO was shouting?? nobody was shouting

- keigo wasn’t gonna shout

- as keigo was about to shout, he felt himself be silenced by his partner

- all keigo could feel was betrayal

- “calm down you hot dog, you’re going to TALK to her in person jfc. you can tell her how much you want to father her children then”

- it was almost time and you were STILL at the food table

- you saw a small intern approach you with an uneasy look on her face

- she was for sure about to reprimand you

- “m-ms. y/n,, we have to go now!” she stuttered

- she was sO! cute you just couldn’t say no

- so you decided to just sneak a few bags of chips under your skirt before smiling and quickly following her

- you made your way to the stage, peeking behind the curtains

- you saw a huge crowd of people, mostly males, but one man who sat near the front caught your eye

- he had bright yellow eyes with matching blond hair, even wearing some eyeliner

- the unknown male looked absolutely delectable

- he made you bark a little tbh

- you took a deep breath before you were pushed by your manager on the stage, cheers suddenly reaching your ears as your fans confessed their love for you

- quit shamelessly might you add

- you blushed as you watched the cute blond-haired man cup his hands around his mouth and yell—

- “I LOVE YOU Y/N! IM YOUR NUMBER ONE FAN!” he yelled, gaining the attention of everyone in the room

- soon everyone started to yell that they were your biggest fan and that the blond man could never even compare

- but the man had nothing but a satisfied smirk plastered on his handsome face

- did he enjoy starting riots?

- you sat on the chair, placing your hands on top of the table

- this was a small table ngl

- luckily there was a sheet on the table, hiding your nervously bouncing legs

- just imagine watching a fancam of you bouncing your leg

- people would still thirst for that

- anyway

- “thank you guys for coming! i’m so excited to meet you all!” you started, smiling at the large number of people

- “you guys can ask me questions or some things? i don’t know?” you laughed, feeling slightly awkward

- you didn’t know how to be a person

- “can you do a dance for us!!” a young boy, about the age of 7 yelled, jumping up and down in front of his seat

- “what dance?” you queried, raising your brow in curiosity

- “move by taemin!!” he cheered, immediately dancing

- you laughed at his adorable actions

- you were totally gonna dance for him!

- you got up as the music started to play in the background, moving to the side of the table and sensually moving to the beat while the audience watched intently

- you carefully moved your hips, hitting all the right beats

- this wasn’t any different than dancing in front of the camera people, plus you had to get used to an audience

- it also wasn’t any different from how you had to dance to kpop songs from when you were younger for your family!!

- (no, literally. the amount of times i had to dance to 2NE1’s i am the best, girls generation’s gee, and wonder girls’ nobody. the dances are engraved in my head. 6 year old giri had to dance or else)

- as the song faded out, you held your pose before bowing, smiling at the little boy who continued to hype you up

- “holy fuck.. dabi that was hot” hawks whispered, tightening his grip around his friends sleeve

- “jeez kei, ease up a bit” dabi complained, prying his friends hand off of him

- “oh my god she’s such a great dancer, do you think she’ll like me if i learn how to dance too?” he questioned, grabbing his friend by the front of his shirt, pissing dabi off once more

- “no. not if you don’t stop being a fuckinf weirdo”

- hawks pouted

- dabi grinned

- how cruel

- “does anyone else have a request?”

- “WAP!!” a number of people yelled, resulting in your face heating up

- how would they suggest such a lewd dance!

- especially when there were children here!

- “haha! that doesn’t seem very appropriate!” you laughed it off, trying your best to mask your uncomfortableness

- hopefully this would end soon

- “no! can you dance to gashina please!” a girl yelled, catching your attention

- hm, gashina was actually a very good suggestion

- you could do this! you could be as great as sunmi!

- okay maybe no. sunmi was a god <3

- you did the routine, catching the eyes and the hearts of the audience

- “fuck i think i’m in love dabi” hawks whined, clutching his chest

- he had a lovesick expression plastered on his face

- he was totally whipped for you, no doubt about it

- before you knew it, it was time for the fans to have a minute to speak to you and for them to get their albums signed!

- you had recently debuted with your album, dawn in tokyo

- you had taken inspiration from the time where you had left your hotel at dawn and walked around the streets of tokyo, sitting near a bridge and writing lyrics for some of the songs in the album

- hence the name of the album

- most of your album was written in japan

- hawks felt himself get more excited as he came closer to you, holding tightly to the fabric of his friends jacket, which wouldn’t surely gotten him slapped if you weren’t so near

- before he knew it, he was already next in line, dabi already sitting in front of your figure while holding your soft, delicate looking hand in his large ugly ones

- this made hawks’ chest bubble with jealousy

- >:(

- sure, you had a large fan base, but it still hurt to see people touch you the way he wanted to

- it was now his turn, he walked up the stairs with his wobbly knees, wanting to just sit and be near you

- he knew that you would be able to calm his nerves, or make him spontaneously combust

- “hey! i’m y/n! nice to meet you!” you smiled, out-stretching your hand to him, offering to place your hand in his own

- he swiftly, but gently grasped your hand, before placing it on his cheek, letting you hold the soft chub of his cheek

- no fan had been this brave to do this. it was quite surprising to be honest

- he wasn’t breaking any rules so you decided to fuck it and go with it

- you placed both your hands on his cheeks, slightly squishing them together, causing him to adorably pout

- “dash not nishe” he mumbled, brows furrowing

- you laughed before letting go of his face, bringing your hands back to your side of the table

- “you’re so cute! can i sign your album for you?” you smiled, tilting your head to the side

- hawks just..dieded

- mans said peace out

- your beauty was incomprehensible

- phew, he had to get his shit together! he was trying to impress u! he wanted to be the mc in a wattpad story

- we all wanna be y/n

- anywayss

- “sure dove! u can make it out to keigo, u can put your number in it too ;)” he winked

- KDNDHSK

- DID HE—

- DID HE JUST ASK FOR YOUR NUMBER

- LIKE—

- nobody:

- y/n: i’m not gon do it girl.. i’m just thinking about it

- “ah! sorry cutie! i’m not allowed to share my number :333”

- you tried to laugh as you died inside

- he smiled, before placing a kiss on your fingertips

- “don’t worry dove,i respect that” he winked

- BARK BARK

- “i have some gifts for you!” he announced, placing the huge paper bag on top of the table

- he first pulled out your favourite snack before handing it to you

- how did he get these??

- omg

- then, he brought out a bottle of perfume, and a new song writing notebook!

- this was great!!

- “oh my gosh! keigo! you’re too sweet” you cooed,

- this was a lot

- “i also have something else.. would you wear this flower crown for me and do some fan-service?” he queried

- of course you would!

- you nodded before placing the flower crown on top of your head

- “what do you want me to say?”

- “say.. i’ll be a good dove for hawks. is that okay?” he smirked, tracing small circles into the palm of your hands

- w-wHAT

- was this legal

- your managers were literally ignoring you—

- “o-oh! sure! uhm-“

- god you were going to regret this

- “i-i’ll be a good dove for hawks!” you whimpered, showing off your practiced aegyo

- “ahhh! my heart!” he gasped, dramatically clutching his chest

- “excuse me, we need the next fan to come up” you manager tapped the both of your arms

- you nodded before smiling at hawks and waving goodbye

- you were going to miss him :((

- ig it just wasn’t meant to be

- the night you had gotten home, you decided to go through your gifts

- you were particularly interested in the gift you had gotten from the blond man

- it was really sweet of him to get you a notebook

- the moment you had opened it, you had noticed that something was written on the first page

- ‘xxx-xxx-xxxx call me pretty girl <3’

- he was a bold onealright

- you were contemplating on actually calling him

- he could leak your number!

- well, you could just wait for him to speak

- fuck it

- you dialed the number on your phone and waited as it rang

- “hello?”

- “i-is this keigo?”

- “hey dove, i’m glad you called”

- y/n: i did it :33

[sekceesimps]

A Rose Made of Chains Ch 1

a/n Thanks for the 50 followers everyone! Keep sending us feedback and requests. 

As promised here is chapter 1. Monday (tomorrow) night I’ll be publishing chapter 2 and then chapter 3 on Tuesday night. More info shortly but when we hit another milestone I’ll be publishing chapters 4-6. 

Once again, thank you so much for the support! We never thought that we’d get this much appreciation from everyone. Hope you enjoy!

sincerely,

Coffee 

Teaser   Ch 2    Ch 3

teaser for part 2,    Ch 4,    Ch 5,   Ch 6,   Ch 7

Kurapika (aged up) x Reader x Chrollo 

Soulmate AU where you can find your soulmate through matching soulmarks. 

Chapter 1

The rocking of the dingy boat made it hard for you to stand, but you did so nonetheless. Bitter water and a nervous type of air had taken over your senses. Your determination to get to the exam had forced you to ignore the wobbling of your legs ad you pushed yourself even further to get to the wheelhouse. When you had finally reached it, you noticed a small kid and two others also struggling to stay on their feet as the storm raged on. You had smiled queasily at the tall man with glasses. You don’t remember much during that moment, at least, not until the blonde passenger began a passionate speech. You tuned most of it out until you saw those glowing scarlet eyes, filled with fiery rage and fervor. Those eyes that haunt your dreams and still stick with you even now. You remember looking deep into that vermillion and knowing exactly who the blonde was in that moment. After his dramatic reveal, you yourself had quietly taken out your contacts and looked at him with a matching passion. In that moment, the two of you knew you were destined to be together, two survivors on the hunt for vengeance. 

»»————-　　————-««

The exam itself wasn’t too rough for you. You and the blonde Kurta, who had later told you that his name was Kurapika, had shared stories as you ran together through the first phase with ease. You had learned that he had been the lone survivor of the massacre. He listened intently when you informed him that you weren’t fully part of the clan, but rather that your father had been and you were raised to be a hunter with your mother far away from the Lukso Province. At that time, you were still hesitant to tell him about your home life, wanting to only listen to him and memorize how he looked in case he was also taken from you. You had always believed yourself to be unlucky for inheriting the scarlet eyes. You had viewed it as a mark of death and a hideous trait from your father, as it had been drilled into your head for the past five years. You had confided in Kurapika about this self hatred, sobbing softly at the thought of you and your family being hunted down for them. You hoped these words wouldn't be intense enough for him to leave you too. When the both of you had reached the end of the tunnel, he had pulled you in close and told you that nothing was more important to him than protecting you, the last member of his clan. You remember how passionate he was with this promise, nuzzling his face into your hair. The rose surrounded by chains inked onto his wrist, the one that was also on your body, had gone unnoticed by you. 

»»————-　　————-««

The second phase of the exam was when you truly began bonding with Kurapika’s companions. Your initial wariness, that his friends had initially interpreted as aloofness, began fading away as you took on a more helpful role for them, a role which would later turn into a sisterly one. After the examiner had let you all loose in the forest, you had quickly joined up again with the blonde Kurta, while also going with the people who were on the boat with you. The green haired boy named Gon and the tall man named Leorio stuck close as you led them through the foggy swamp. Through your trek, you had learned more about who they were and in that time you vowed to yourself that you would protect the young boy and try to help him on his quest to becoming a hunter. His demeanor and passion was something you admired and wished to see more of. You remember how in that trek, your small party had come across the magician named Hisoka that Kurapika had initially told you to be wary of before the exam had even started. You were all crouching and watching as the red haired man ruthlessly slaughtered a capable group of examinees. The rest of what happened was a little blurry to you, but you remember your anger when the magician had smirked at you and told you how ravishing you looked and in that moment you had chosen to fight. It had ended rather quickly, his combat skills were much better than you could have ever imagined. Somehow he had still managed to flirt with you while you and Gon tried to attack. You attributed your flushed red face to the fight rather than some of the steamy words he had whispered before tossing you to the ground. Hisoka had easily taken out Leorio but happily said that your group had passed, whatever that meant. The atmosphere was uncomfortable to say the least as you and your companion continued on your way. You and Gon successfully met up again with Kurapika and Gon’s white haired friend from the first phase. Kurapika had quietly asked if you were okay as he tended to a minor wound on your arm. You fondly remember the concentration on his face as you reassured him of your safety, no one you had ever met showed you this type of warmth before. That moment was when you had realized that you cared deeply for him. 

»»————-　　————-««

The rest of the exam had been fairly unmemorable. There was a whole struggle with the gourmet hunters, but you had powered through with Kurapika at your side, as usual. The third phase was unfortunately when you and your new friends had gotten separated. The five of you had lined up on the tiles at the top of trick tower and jumped in. You didn’t know what happened to your companions, but you recognized the urgency of passing the phase and went down the dark hallway alone. You recall the surprise of meeting up with Hisoka during the test, teaming up to brave the last part of the tower together. The two of you ended up successfully being the first and second people to pass, with days left to spare. As the hours passed with you and the magician  wordlessly sitting together in silence, you couldn’t help but think of what Kurapika and the rest of the boys were doing right now. Your anxiety only increased when other examinees continued coming through and the blonde was still nowhere in sight. 

“Darling, what’s got you looking so stressed. Your eyebrows are too crinkled,” Hisoka had interrupted your endlessly running fearful thoughts about 50 hours into the exam. You only sighed and ignored him. “You know, we make an incredible team. I’d love to truly fight you one day. You have this certain aura that I would just love to break” he continued and licked his lips, looking down on you with eyes of pure malice. 

“I’ve got a delicious idea that could tire you out easily,” the man grinned with mischief and scooted closer to you. You glared at him in response, frantically trying to push him away. He chuckles at your pitiful attempt, but leaves you be for now. 

“Thanks for the concern, I guess. I’m just tired and I can’t seem to fall asleep.” you mumbled and fiddled with your hands. You wished that Kurapika were with you, his presence somehow always filled you with ease. 

It was down to the wire, when your hope ran out and you had accepted that your companions would not pass this phase. Sighing you went to Hisoka for a conversation, at this point he was the only person you knew since everybody else around you filled you with uncertainty. It was at that moment that your four companions and some other guy burst into the clearing at the last possible second. You grinned and waved at Kurapika, but he wasn’t looking at you. Instead, he was glaring daggers at Hisoka, who had put his hand on your waist when you hadn’t noticed. You shrugged him off and gave the blonde teen the warmest of smiles. You hoped that it made his heart melt, he had seemed cold after you two had been seperated. 

»»————-　　————-««

Zevil Island was unbearably hot. The whole area was much too warm for your liking. It was almost off putting how hot it was, a sharp contrast to the freezing cold demeanors of your fellow examinees. As you got off the boat, Gon had smiled and congratulated you on coming in second.  This meant that you were one of the first to get off the boat and begin the trial. Kurapika looked far away as you had told him how you planned to stick by his side this time. He nodded solemnly as you told him that you would be off first so you would find him when he started. You had hidden in a tree and waited hours for him to finally get there. You remember grinning and how that instantly put him in a less tense position after you had jumped down and surprised him. You hoped that his ease with you was a sign that he cared about you too. Fortunately, neither of you had a target you knew, so you had both got your buttons fairly quickly, the two of you truly being excellent partners. The rest of the test was spent helping Leorio again, as the two of you powered through together, back to your friendly dynamic. You treasured how he said he wouldn’t let you out of his sight again. With that phase over, and all of you at rest before the final phase, you saw it fit to bring up soulmates with Kurapika. 

“Kurapika! How are you.” You caught him as he was pacing the area in front of his room. 

“Huh? Oh, hey Y/N,” he had grinned with surprise at seeing you, “do you want to go on a walk with me?” His invitation made your cheeks flush red, but you gave an enthusiastic yes and followed him. You talked about meaningless things like music taste at first, then your ambitions, your thoughts on the future, and then finally you brought up the one subject you were anxious about covering. You were beginning to have a suspicion that the blonde was your soulmate. The two of you had just gotten along so perfectly. It seemed like fate intervening when you two had met on that boat and he had revealed his identity. You hoped that it would be him who you’d spend your life with. He was so intelligent and calm. Not to mention, also incredibly attractive. You weren’t too sure how to ask him if he had a soulmate. Your own soulmark was inked onto your thigh, a place that made it hard for others to be able to identify you as their own soulmate. The placement made it much easier to pass off as someone without a soulmate. It was common for people not to have a soulmate now. In fact, it was also a common occurrence for people to lose their soulmate and then their mark would disappear. There were also terrible people in this world who would leave their soulmates, not everyone had a happily ever after and you were especially aware of this, your own parents being a soulmate couple that split up. The concept of a soulmate was once incredibly appealing to you as you grew up, but the more pain you saw in the world the more you gave up on the dream of a perfect partner determined by fate.  Yet you silently prayed to whatever God that was listening for his mark to be a blooming rose being wrapped up by heavy chains. 

“So, what are your thoughts about soulmates?” you inquired casually. He looked at you with a slightly surprised smile before answering, 

“I think it’s definitely an interesting concept. I want to find someone one day. The idea of a person matching and completing my soul is so fulfilling. But it would be too much of a danger for me to have a soulmate right now. I want to meet them later, after I’ve done what I need to do. I just can’t have them be with me, it wouldn’t be fair to them,” he stated seriously, “what about you?” Those few words promptly break your heart. If you were his soulmate, you promised yourself in that instance to hold strong and wait for him. His heart is too heavy right now to take on the burden of you. 

You sit next to him in silence for a bit, unsure of how to answer him, so instead you ask “What’s your soulmark,” breaking the awkwardness. He smiles and shows his wrist  to you. In sharp contrast to his pale skin you see black and red marking his left wrist. A crimson rose encased in black chains, it matches yours perfectly. Your stomach drops. You don’t want to seem suspicious so you run your fingers lightly over his delicate skin and smile, you compliment the design and tell him how lucky he is.  

“Y/N, can I see your soulmark” he had asked so sweetly and looked at you with the soft smoky eyes you had begun to love. 

“I actually don’t have one,” you grin, trying to hide your pained words. It hurt you more than anything to lie to him, to have to see his small amount of joy dissipate. It’s all for the best you think to yourself. Someone as perfect as him shouldn’t have to weigh himself down with someone like me. You smile softly again and change the topic before wishing him a goodnight.  

»»————-　　————-««

Passing the hunter exam and gaining your license didn’t fill you with as much excitement as you expected it to. You felt bad for Gon, seeing as his friend didn’t pass. You liked the green haired boy quite a bit and wanted to help him the best you could. So when your soulmate said that he was going to go off on his own and earn money for the auction, you decided in that moment that it was time for you two to part. You wanted to help Gon find Killua and you needed some time without Kurapika so that you could think of your own future. You told him this but not without a vow to see him again. 

“I promise that I’ll see you again” you declared with angry resolve. Kurapika smiles softly and places a light kiss on your forehead. You sigh and interlocked your fingers with his for one last time. 

“As do I,” he replied, backing away and waving to you and your travel companions. You were going to fight tooth and nail to see him again in York New City.

»»————-　　————-«« 

Icy water splashed across your frail sleeping form. You sharply gasp as the frigid splash wakes you from your dreams about the past. You don’t know how long you’ve been here or even where you are. You let out another sharp yelp in pain when a blade as quick as light rips the skin on your barely healed cheek apart. It always starts like this. A man comes in and jolts you awake, then he reopens the wounds from when they took you, before implementing some new form of injury. The last form of torture is always expected in your day and you weren’t sure in the first few sessions, but in all of them the same dark figure stood behind in the shadows. Watching but never saying anything. You were in agony at the end of every day, but your decisiveness remained the same each time. At the end of these sessions your torturer would ask if you wanted to join his group, you would let out a snarky reply saying no, then he would leave you in darkness for several days before coming back and starting it all over again. However, your resolve was becoming shorter and shorter with each passing day. You didn’t know if your friends even knew you were here. You were starting to believe that no one was coming to save you, no happy ending in sight. All you want is to see your blonde soulmate one last time. The dark quickly closes in again as the door closes shut, leaving you to your dream like state again. 

a/n Chrollo in the next chapter, I promise. Please leave some feedback, as this is my first chapter fic. Anyways hope you enjoyed, Ch 2 out tomorrow!

~Happy Holidays!~

[gumnut-logic]

Callisto (Voyage - Bit 2)

Prologue Incident - Bit 1 | Bit 2 Fallout - Bit 1 | Bit 2 | Bit 3 Voyage - Bit 1 | Bit 2

As I continue to write the Prologue, have a little Lee Taylor and Jeff with some Johnny and Scott on the side.

As always, many, many thanks to @tsarinatorment​ @scribbles97​ and @janetm74​ for the ongoing support, as well as my technical advisor @onereyofstarlight​ for the geek out fest on the weekend ::hugs you all::

I hope you enjoy this. I’m certainly enjoying the challenge :D

-o-o-o-

Jeff stared after his son for a long moment. Emotion swirled in his head and tangled with his stomach. That lightspeed jump did mess with his innards more than he would admit.

But Virgil’s words messed him up even more.

What weren’t they telling him? What had happened to Scott while he was gone?

He had read a good percentage of the mission reports and backtracked through Tracy Industries’ history over that eight years. Scott’s conduct was exemplary. He couldn’t be prouder. Both organisations had flourished under his sons’ management, Scott being the major driving force, but his younger sons stepping in where needed.

Hell, even Gordon had dabbled in aquaculture and Tracy Industries was now a major player on that front.

Something soured in his gut that had nothing to do with lightspeed travel. Perhaps he needed to be a little more honest with himself. Maybe things had gone so well, that in truth, his return wasn’t really needed.

Scott was brilliant, his brothers…hell, Jeff was ever so proud. His sons were everything. They had accomplished so much.

But what did that leave for Jeff?

He cursed under his breath, disgusted with himself. His natural competitive tendencies did not need to be deployed against his own children.

But that vacant feeling of loss and lack of purpose swelled. He hadn’t even thought about not going on this mission. He had grabbed it like a lifeline and now, somehow, he had managed to alienate those brilliant young sons and caused pain and worry where he had no intention.

“Jeff? Where the hell are you?”

Lee.

Despite himself, Jeff smiled.

Pushing off from the bed, he floated through the door and into the corridor. Lee was expertly manoeuvring down one wall, his experience showing in every movement. “I have to say that this baby of yours definitely hits the spot. I’ll have two for the Mars colony, please.”

Jeff snorted. “Get in line. The GDF are already on my back.”

Lee pulled up alongside. “You gonna give them one?”

“I doubt it.” He sighed. “Val is ready to vouch, but from what I’ve read from the last eight years…I don’t think they can be trusted.”

“Then what are you going to do?” They drifted down the corridor towards the mess. “This technology is a great step forward.”

“Yeah. So much power, Lee. I’ve worried about the Thunderbirds getting into the wrong hands. This….hell…Brains and Michael make a formidable team.”

“Your boys make a formidable team, Jeff. You should be proud.”

“I am.”

Lee pulled him to a halt with a hand. “Then what the hell are you doing out here, Jeff? Gerry had me on the pipeline frantic.”

Jeff blinked. “Gerry?”

“The swimming one.”

“Oh, Gordon?”

Lee waved a hand dismissively. “Yeah, whatever. But he was upset. Said you were trying to kill yourself.”

“What?!”

“Said your health wasn’t up to a long space flight. I know you know better than that, Colonel.” Blue eyes pinned him.

Oh, for the love of-

“I’m fine, Lee.”

“Bullshit. You may not be using that cane of yours, but I saw your medical charts when you got back. You fried your bones good, and your circulation has seen better days. Don’t think I’m an idiot. Gerry may be the excitable one, but he’s not dumb. Hell, even I can see Vinnie and Steve ain’t happy either.”

Jeff stared at him, caught between outrage that his best friend still couldn’t remember his sons’ names and the thought that Lee was also ganging up on him along with those sons.

“I am perfectly capable of handling this voyage. It is short. It is safe.”

Lee snorted with derision. “I know you know that there is nothing ‘safe’ about any space voyage, Jeff. Hell, you’re the one who taught me that. What are you playing at?”

That got his back up. “What am I playing at? Berry and Ju are missing, Lee.”

“Don’t you trust your boys?”

“I trust them!”

“Then let them do their jobs. You’ve done enough.”

Jeff glared at him. “I don’t see you retiring your space legs.”

“I didn’t go missing for eight years and fry my bones. You don’t have to do this. Your boys will find Berry and Ju. I’ve seen them in action. You should trust them.”

Jeff’s shoulders dropped. “I do.” It was an exhale. But... “Lee, I have to. I can’t sit on the sidelines anymore.”

Blue eyes stared at him, appraising. They weren’t unlike his eldest son’s eyes and probably shared the gene through Lucille.

The thought of his wife clenched his heart like it always did. Lee didn’t look much like his sister, but there were traces.

“Well, you’ve argued your ass out here. Looks like you’ve pissed half your family off in the process. I’d tread carefully. That eldest of yours looks ready to chew iron.”

Jeff grunted.

Lee reached out and grabbed an arm. “They’re good boys.” A swallow. “Lucy would be very, very proud.”

It was targeted and it hit perfectly. His throat tightened just a little. “I know.”

No more than breath. “I know.”

-o-o-o-

“I want to know why.”

John looked up from his tablet to see Scott floating in the doorway.

The astronaut knew this was coming. Hence his retreat to Thunderbird Five for a ‘systems check’.

“Because Dad needs this.” He turned back to his tablet, poked the device and shut down the scan he was running.

Scott pushed off the door frame and pivoted to a vertical stance - as a commanding posture as he could get in zero-g.

John raised an eyebrow, but didn’t comment, forcing himself to relax in his partially seated position. He knew his brother was unhappy with him and he understood why. So, the question was a pertinent one.

“Dad does not need more illness and that is exactly where this is leading.”

“We won’t be out here that long.”

“How do you know? We don’t know what has happened? We won’t know fully until we are on site.”

John let his brother’s ire wash over him. “Scott, what are you going to do the day they say you can no longer fly?”

Blue eyes stared at him a moment. “What has that got to do with anything?”

John’s lips thinned. “Deny it all you want, but you know exactly what I mean.” He held his brother’s glare. “Dad has been grounded for nearly two years. Put yourself in his place. How do you think you would feel?”

He could see the inner turmoil on his big brother’s face. He hated going against Scott. It didn’t happen often, but it did happen and each time it hurt because it felt so wrong. Someone had to stand up for Dad in this and John feared the day he would be in his father’s place. To not be able to go into space. To never be able to see the stars unfettered by atmosphere again…he dreaded it. Just like he knew Scott dreaded losing his wings.

It was inevitable and they would both fight it as long as they could.

Just like their father.

But understanding didn’t make it any easier from a son’s perspective either. John knew in intimate detail exactly what his father’s health issues were. He empathised with him in ways that perhaps only Alan amongst his brothers could possibly understand. If he wasn’t careful, this was his future, too. Perhaps not as severe, perhaps not quite the same, but the risks were there.

His father’s cane reminded him every time he saw it.

Scott had already changed his rota on Five, Alan standing in more often, John on solid ground enough for cursed gravity to keep his systems running as they should.

Virgil had become hypervigilant as well, medical checks increased. He had once caught Dad’s chart up on display right next to his own, Virgil’s eyes comparing symptoms, obviously worried towards preventing issues before they happened in his little brother.

It had been a taxing couple of years.

“Okay, you’ve made your point.” It was grudging. “But it doesn’t remove the fact that his health is at risk. After all he’s been through…he’s been hurt enough.”

“Him or us?”

“Excuse me?”

“We have all been through hell and back. This isn’t just about Dad, Scott. I know. I’m just as scared as you.” He was, but he was shunting it away. He couldn’t afford it. “But this is who he is. You know that. He’s not going to wrap himself in a blanket, sit in a chair and rock his life away. If he did, he wouldn’t be Dad.” He blinked. “How do you see your twilight years? Are you going to slow down any time soon?”

“John-“

“He’s got all of us. He’s not alone out here. We’ll keep him safe.”

Blue eyes continued to stare at him, but there were no more words for a long time.

John simply stared back, calm and waiting.

“I am so angry at you.” The words slipped from his brother’s lips in frustration.

“I know.” John tilted his head just slightly. “Because you know I’m right.”

Scott got angry a lot, but he was rarely blinded by it. He couldn’t afford to be. And while Virgil tackled their big brother in his own way, John, in the few times Scott turned to him in this kind of situation, found that waiting him out with calm words usually worked. Not always, sometimes his brother just exploded more. But this time, this time John knew he was right and that Scott would understand, if he would listen.

His brother’s lips thinned, obviously with reluctance. “I want a medical monitor on him at all times. I want Five trained on him at all times.”

John arched an eyebrow, reached over and thumbed a switch. Their father’s vitals flickered into all their holographic glory. “Virgil already beat you to it. Wouldn’t let him on board without it.”

Those eyes tracked the readouts but Scott didn’t comment. “Keep an eye on him.”

John sighed and picked up his tablet again. As if he would do anything else. “Just like I do with all of you. They don’t call me the ‘Eye in the Sky’ for nothing.”

A grunt and Scott moved back towards the door. John poked at his tablet and resumed the scan he had been running. It wasn’t often humans were in this chunk of space and he planned to record everything he could.

If he was non-verbally dismissing his brother, it was on purpose. Scott needed to process and John was not needed for that.

And John had work to do before they jumped again.

He didn’t notice his brother leave.

-o-o-o-

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