#i hope you all enjoy my ramblings
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The shirt reads âI prevented the chaos heart and all I got for it was this lousy t shirtâ
This was a super rough comic I did when I was initially thinking of this idea and I never got around to posting it. For when I was watching the movie I kept thinking to myself if Peach said yes would the chaos heart appear? Which was one of the main sources of inspiration for this au setup.
I was hoping to finally post the power-up designs/outfits Iâve been working on for this au, but it turns out my lasso tool decided it would be cool to grab other layers without my knowledge. So lo and behold I go to check some of the finished pieces and oops all screwed up! Totally not bitter about that at all : )
#smb#luigi#peach#merlon#general guy#super mario bros#mario#my art#i hope you all enjoy my ramblings#mr l#mario and the phantom
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fast sketch of ominis & fast intro to the ominis longfic I'm working on!! This is going to be the most self-indulgent pride and prejudice ripoff that ever existed, 100% based on the ominis of my oneshotđ
I am just OBSESSED with exploring the idea that heâs a natural legilimens & OBSESSED with the thought that he thinks too much for his own goodđ«¶đ«¶đ«¶
Ominis Gaunt has always suspected he is cold-blooded.
It makes sense, really.
He always seems to be cold: frigid, long fingers that are often stiff and difficult to move; goosebumps raising the skin of his arms and the back of his neck any time he walks through the drafty halls of the dungeons; even his eyes, he has been told, are reminiscent of ice. They are apparently quite unsettling. The only time he feels comfortable in his body is when he basks in the heat of the sun.
His earliest memory is of the cold. It went like this: he was four years old: his older brother, Marvolo, had led him outside as a joke, he swore up and down that it was just a small joke, and how was he supposed to know that poor, blind Ominis would not be able to find his way back home? When his parents had finally found him, his frail mother sobbing and holding his tiny, blue, hypothermic body to her chest, Ominis remembers feeling quite perturbed at the disturbance. Couldnât he just be left alone, in the silent soft snow?
He does not know if he has ever felt warm since.
As he strides through the dungeons, the copious amount of warming charms he casts on himself do not seem to be enough, but he keeps casting them anyways and also: wrapping his wool scarf more tightly around his neck, quickening his pace in the hopes that blood flows more easily through his limbs, wishing that he had remembered his gloves. Winter is always a terrible time of year (this winter more terrible than usual), and every breath of warm air leaves his lips reluctantly. How he wishes that he could just hold on to it a bit longer and yet the warmth leaves him precisely fifteen traitorous times a minute, the frigid air gleefully entering and burning its way down his throat in response. Maybe itâs a punishment of some sort.
His whole life has been defined by punishments and sometimes he preoccupies himself with the thought that it is the only way he can view the world. Most of the punishments are manifested in curses inherited from his family. (His parents and Marvolo insist that they are gifts, but Ominis begs to differ.)
First, his blindness: the only true punishment-curse that even his family rejects: caused by inbreeding, no doubt. He did not cry after his birth and his mother cradled his tiny body in silent arms, lovingly whispering nonsense-evil-Parseltongue to him but when he opened his eyes and she saw a brilliant celestine blue with no iris, she screamed in horror and shattered the frigid peace of the room. His parents tried everything to fix him, make him whole, throwing money at various possible solutions to no avail. Magically induced disabilities are not, apparently, curable by magic.
Ominis is not sure that he hates being blind, although he suspects everyone thinks that he should. It is as much a part of him as his fifteen-breaths-per-minute, and he thinks that vision is not all itâs cracked up to be. He is always terrified at the thought that his tenuous hold on sanity is only due to the fact that he cannot see, until he realizes he shouldnât be terrified of hypothetical situations that cannot come to pass. He consoles himself with the thought that maybe, if he has had to give up his vision for his sanity, it is a small price to pay. Although, he also thinks sometimes that it would be nice to live a life without any morality holding him back.
He is entirely too introspective, after all.
It is precisely this introspection that is his downfall in this moment (and his cold blood). Ominis is so busy casting warming charms on himself and thinking in circles that he cannot use his wand to help him sense his environment and so he should not be surprised when he crashes into her.
And yet he is. Terribly surprised.
Maybe if he were not so caught up in his own thoughts he could have paid more attention to his surroundings. Instead, he spent too much time ruminating on his reptilian heritage and has now barreled head first into his arch-nemesis.
Rosalie Harris.
The girl who has stolen his oldest friend from him.
The girl who is currently making angry noises as she clambers to her feet and is picking up the things that he has crashed everywhere. Even if he could see, Ominis is not sure he would help her. Helping her would be akin to betraying himself, after all.
âHey! Watch where youâre - oh, hello, Ominis.â
âRosalie,â he says shortly, nodding his head where he thinks she might be standing and stepping to the side. He tightens his grip around his wand, feeling the texture of the wood change from rough to smooth as he runs his thumb down it. Smooth where he always seems to worry it, rough where the wood refuses to yield to the brushes of his thumb.
He surreptitiously casts the spell - he has at least done it so many times he no longer needs to say it out loud - and his surroundings light up. Or, he supposes that is the most apt description, considering he cannot actually differentiate between light and dark. He senses Rosalieâs silhouette to his left - she is standing with her arms crossed and her foot taps impatiently as she waits for him.
Waiting for what? he thinks, slightly irritated. She never seems to leave him alone and he wracks his brain trying to think of something, anything he can say to get rid of her.
Maybe if he speaks in Parseltongue, she would finally be scared away for good. He does not really want that second reminder of his familyâs curse, though.
His family preferred speaking in Parseltongue with each other, believing the ability made them morally superior to everyone else and Ominis had not even realized until he had arrived at Hogwarts that no, it was not normal. When his name had been called at the Sorting, furious whispers had erupted amongst all the students, and his every step (terrified, confused, unsure - he had still been getting used to using his wand to navigate his surroundings) to the stool at the front of the Great Hall was plagued with a susurration reminiscent of snakes. Except these whispers, sneaking their way into his mind, had been unkind and overwhelming.
(He had not realized in that moment that he was also hearing their thoughts.)
Maybe now, with Rosalie standing in front of him and just annoyingly waiting for Merlin-knows-what, Ominis should use his Legilimency to find out what Rosalie wants. (He hates it, though.) It would not be difficult. (The thought makes him shiver in horror because he doesnât want to abuse the ability.) He can feel the edges of her mind, her magic, and all he has to do is reach out - she is right there, and -
âOminis?â
Her arms are crossed, he hears an impatient huff.
Why hasnât she left him alone yet?
Hadnât the Hogwarts Express already left the station, bringing all of the students home for the winter holiday? Ominis had thought he would be one of the only students left in the castle, and if he is being honest with himself, he had been looking quite forward to having the place to himself.
Ominisâs winter has just gotten infinitely worse.
Going to Gaunt Manor for the holidays is out of the question (he will not think about the nightmares that have been plaguing him ever since he received the owl demanding he go home), and Ominis does not want to be more of a burden to the Sallows. They already do enough for him over the summer, and Sebastian and Anne have convinced him to go to Hogsmeade with them at least twice over the next two weeks. Besides, with Anneâs curse progressing, Ominis does not want to be in the way.
âWhy are you still here?â Ominis asks. He knows his voice comes across as cold as his blood, blunt, but he cannot help himself. Ever since Rosalie arrived - her entrance to Hogwarts also causing quite the stir - Ominis has been intensely annoyed by her presence. She is too happy. Too carefree. TooâŠwell, everything he is not.
And, she does not seem to leave him alone.
Rosalie is always there, always hanging around Sebastian. (Taking Sebastian away.) He even showed her the Undercroft, which had almost caused a rift in their relationship. Ominis could not believe that Sebastian would be so careless, showing someone who for all intents and purposes is crashing her way into their lives, forcing them to pay attention to her. They barely even knew her, and yet Sebastian thought it was a good idea to show her such a sacred place?
(It does not help that she is intelligent, and Ominis has caught himself on more than one occasion about to ask her about her opinion on something before he catches himself.)
âI was looking for you.â
Ominis tilts his head at that and fiddles with his ring. He considers walking away, leaving -
âI meanâŠSebastian said that you were also going to be here over the holidays and since everyone else just left I thought -â
âThought what?â Internally, Ominis winces at the biting tone to his voice. It came out harsher than he intended, his voice loud and echoing through his mind, bouncing off the cold, stone walls surrounding them.
#the girlâs name and gender tbh is subject to change#Iâm having a lot of fun writing this up but it was all just written up on a whim#idk when Iâll FULLY be able to commit to this#but I always have so much fun writing his POV#SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY!!! & forgive the messy sketchđ#honestly most of this is subject to be edited and/or changed#bc you are getting my writing before any editing whatsoever heređł#I just love the idea of Ominis being so full of conflicting pride and shame and lots of confusion#and the love interest to be so annoying and bratty and headstrong#basically an Elizabeth Bennet you knowâŠshe always thinks sheâs right (she isnât) and her first impressions are the law#Iâm actually reading Mansfield Park nowâŠJane Austen please bless me as I write tonightđđ#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hphl#ominis gaunt fanfiction#ominis#ominis x mc#hogwarts legacy ominis#ominis gaunt#ominis gaunt fanart#also I have WAY MORE WRITTEN!!! mostly just unconnected ramblings from his pov about how he thinks about life#& snapshots of his first year at Hogwarts đ„șđ„șđ„ș#I really am an Ominis girlâŠ#hogwarts legacy fanfic
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Hie!!
Do you have any johnlock fic recs :3
( or parentlock, it consumes me )
Ooh so you want to go down this rabbit hole with me, then!
These are in no particular order, just fics I've read recently or just a handful of the many authors this fandom has to offer whom I respect deeply.
Parentlock has been all I've been reading for the last several weeks, honestly, been on a real kick & need it like oxygen!
I can't reccomend anything by JenTheSweetie on ao3 highly enough - her Parentlock is just deliciously in-character, witty and tangible. instruction manual not included and Immune to Your Consultations (feat. teenage Rosie, which we don't have nearly enough of in my opinion) have been my most recently read and are just *chefs kiss*
@lurikko also has written Ten Years (feat. scheming matchmaker Rosie) and A Weird Place (which is tagged 'Just raising their kid and being confused' and...yeah, succinct, brilliant summary, have re-read this one several times)
@arwamachine has written Indefinite Lines, a gloriously long post-S4 casefic featuring lots of lovely family dynamics between Sherlock, John and Rosie in between (one of the parentlock fics of all time, in my opinion) and I also got done reading Winning the Goat, which is so amazingly witty and comical and just generally wonderfully written.
Swan Dive by @hitlikehammers is 5+1 featuring an emphasis on the relationship between Sherlock and Rosie and is once again, brilliantly characterized and wonderful to read
Keep on Changing by philalethia is a good, spooky post-S4 parentlock fic (read it for Halloween, did not disappoint!)
I know @missdaviswrites has also written heaps wonderful parentlock stories and there are plenty of stories that feature Rosie as a character and lovely domestic/parenthood fluff out there on ao3 that I haven't listed (these are mostly ones I've read recently or that come to mind)
As for general Johnlock fics...! (Most of these, again, are what I've been reading recently or first come to mind)
until we fall asleep by @itsonlytext is set post-TLD and is angsty, tense, realistic, soft, quiet, and in-character all at once and is such a little hidden gem that not nearly enough people are talking about right now!
A Thrill Failed to Deliver by @jbaillier who I know by her dozens of stunning medical realism and angst fics, in my opinion never disappoints. Have never been happier to see an author come back from a hiatus, lol!)
An Ounce of Cure by @bakertumblings is another great medical realism fic, this time with John as the one getting hit with all the angst and whump
What it Can Be by @naefelldaurk is a spin on the end of TLD and offers a much more satisfying end, brilliantly in character and wonderfully paced.
@calaisreno just finished When Harry Met Mary which follows the events of S3/4 through Harry Watson's POV (brilliant fic for those who are sick of Harry getting reduced to nothing more than John's alcoholic sister; her role in this is brilliant, developed and enjoyable). Also read DĂ©jĂ Vu which is part of her genius Off-Axis series (frankly in love with all of her AUs)
The Fallen series by @engazed is one I've started just recently but has already hooked me!
Thirst by @holmesianpose is another one I've just started, so not too far in, yet, but still wonderfully written thus far!
@gaylilsherlock wrote Cutting Out the Middle Man recently (along with the several other Johnlock fics they've been putting out at admirable speeds), featuring getting-together between John and Sherlock and Greg Lestrade as a wingman and the delicious Watson & Lestrade pub scene!
Double or Nothing by @crowson75 is a study in John's bisexuality, gripping casefic, wonderfully smutty and realistically characterized, post-S4 and finally sees these two idiots figuring themselves out.
Not a Johnlock fic (there is background Johnlock, though!) but instead itâs a Mystrade one, is The Habits of a Lifetime by @out-there-tmblr and is definitely a Greg x Mycroft story but also a beautiful and realistic 54k words of a Mycroft character study and is just too much of a favorite of mine for me not to put on a rec list.
I also highly reccomend anything written by @totallysilvergirl, @the-reading-lemon, @weeesi, and @7-percent.
Realizing so many of these are post S4 or S4 compliant but I just love some good fix-its, I suppose. Hope some of these are to your liking, as they are all certainly to mine :)
#fic recs#i always feel weird doing rec lists because there's just TOO many fics for me to list in one go#but these are all fairly recently written or currently being updated or just authors i really do adore and have done since before being on#hope you enjoy! (and hopefully one day i'll be able to self-rec as i've got my own parentlock fic on the way!)#ask#my rambles#bbc sherlock#sherlock holmes#john watson#johnlock#parentlock#rosie watson
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so I personally needed a compilation of the Kara âI can be subtleâ Danvers moments from @supergirlpolls and I made this
#i spent all morning looking for these specific episodes#like I can find gifsets easy but finding the specific ep?? that was harder than I thought#I was skipping through eps looking for specific outfits lmao#anyway. i hope you enjoy my poor video editing skills. i learned how to use imovie today#supercorp#danvers sisters#supergirl#kara danvers#lena luthor#alex danvers#melissa benoist#katie mcgrath#chyler leigh#i made my gf watch these and she was like âsheâs so stupidâ and I was like âLena or Karaâ and she was like âbothâ#and thatâs true#i love two idiots#donât mind me rambling to the void
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Rhett & Link's Wonderhole
#okay so this is like my sum up of the whole season post#it's my tribute to wonderhole#this whole blog kinda is but ya know#I will probably make more gifs of the last ep but as this is the last ep of the season I thought I would do a gif round up#and making all these gifs kinda took it out of me#fun fact this is very close to the gif limit on here#it is a very long post but you know wonderhole deserves it#I have really enjoyed the season#from watching that first ep on my birthday til now#it has been a fun Saturday thing for me to watch in the morning and make gifs of for the rest of the day#I love that it all came back to the beginning with it all being what they filmed on the coconut while they were stranded on the island#I do love when stuff loops like that#Especially looping back to that beach scene which was the scene that made me make this blog#because it was so pretty I was like oh I need to make gifs and now here we are#my favourite ep is still the second one mainly because of the colours and future aesthetic it had#I think it was fun and it was fun to see them letting their creativity flow through the episodes#it kind of hits you with the comedy but it also makes you feel a lot of emotions which I have loved#so thanks wonderhole you have been a beautiful thing and I hope there will be more in the future ily#thanks to Rhett and Link for making this because I have loved it#it was a special thing#also shout out to everyone who has interacted with any of my posts on here I did not expect anyone to so thanks :))#these tags really just turned into me rambling so hi if you made it this far#rhett and link#rhett and link's wonderhole#rhett and link gifs#rhett mclaughlin#link neal#my gifs#wonderhole spoilers
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Trouble? You're only in trouble if you get caught. So don't let me catch you ~
uhhhhh say hi to jamil and yuusha's kid jas(mine) pt 2 (also here and here are like my only two other posts of her)
HFDDF OKAY SO - i actually had these unfinished sketches from months ago of jas as a nrc student and scarabia housewarden
this sneaky little bastard (affectionate) had never left my cranium she was just sitting idly by
im sobbing i hate jas so much (lie i love her)
jamil and yuusha still aren't supposed to have a kid so i just imagine this to be an alternate timeline for them đ€§đ€§đ€§
soooo info dump time ---
ââââââ⊠scarabia housewarden nrc jas
jas has a vice-housewarden who is her childhood best friend (figuring out if i want them to be twst rajah or abu)
also thinking about if i want yuusha to be a staff member in nrc with grim or just dead during this time (why? just because)
no further info tbh, scarabia housewarden jas is just vibing
ââââââ⊠child jas stuffs
i'm SO indecisive about her design as a toddler/preteen lowkey đ
she was very sweet as a toddler but somewhere along the line she just became more carefree and chaotic
jas is a mama's girl but is more alike with her father than she cares to admit
octavinelle trio and heartslabyul duo + grim are like the honorary uncles (jas's favorites are floyd, ace, and grim bc they sometimes enable her with shenanigans)
even though jas has favorite uncles, najma is the favorite favorite. i imagine she's just the cool aunt
if mama yuu is "shrimpy" then jas is a "tiger prawn" (bc rajah)
jas LOVES doing people's hair including her own; would rather do them by hand rather than by magic
jamil showed jas how to breakdance once and it became ingrained in her personality ever since
(there's probably still more about her that i'm forgetting but this is it for now)
ââââââ⊠bonus future jamiyuu stuff because i miss them
jamil took yuusha's last name surprise surprise (if they get married)
i imagine after nrc they'd be travelling together actually, not necessarily settling down
(i'm REALLY not 100% on them settling down and having a kid but i still love jas a lot so im so conflicted) (that's why aus exist đâš)
(and if hypothetically they do settle down i think yuusha being staff in nrc with grim + maybe jamil who travels for work (or being a house husband??? maybe they alternate roles) can be adorable ideas)
ââââââ⊠(i also had this thing that i never posted about that one trope of a fankid finding themselves in nrc bc of portal/time/mirror shenanigans)
(jamil found both of them asleep somewhere and refuses to wake them up)
also some bonus tidbits about this scenario with them:
đ: Is she a family member of yours? How'd she get here?
đ: I have never seen that child in my life before now. And there's no way I could have missed news about a new relative of mine.
đ: You know how ridiculous it sounds if she's related to me. I'm not from here. She even looks more like you!
đ: Jas has the same color of eyes as you. Didn't you tell me she mistook you for her mother?
đ: ...Yeah, but I don't like what you're implying.
đ: Well, I'm not exactly happy with this either.
they're just both in denial of the implication of this child existing and neither of them is saying it out loud.
and the angst/wholesomeness(???) of jamil asking jas's full name and hearing that she has her mother's last name instead of his
eventually they grew attached (unfortunately) until somehow they send jas home to her original timeline
and then they finally have a real conversation about what all that was about
anyways thank you for reading if you've made it this far;;; end tweet
#hdfsdfkjs another brain dump but i feel like i'm giving inconsistent lore đđđ#iâm bawlin#i dont write these down they just exist so all my thoughts are scattered#anyways i screenshotted the ask so that tumblr would keep the formatting with the photos >:(#anon i hope you still see this bc tumblr doesnt even notify anons anyway đđđ#and thank you for giving me the excuse to info dump about her the best i can đ#[ââŠ-#-⧠oc rambles#-⧠my art#twst art#twst#twisted wonderland#jamil viper#twst oc x canon#jamil x yuu#twst yuu#twst yuusona#(đ) yuusha#(đ) curry noodles#(đș) jas#nextgenđ#twst fankid#twst fanchild#twst oc#-âŠâ]#i think the girl finally deserves her own tag#but i'm not sure how much more i'm going to post about her đ#even though i enjoy her character concept hnghhh
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25 Days of Agere Moodboards! Day 8: Ideal Playroom!!
#playroom#!!!#my ideal playroom is basically an indoor park#i would want swings and slides and lots of space to run around#also space to read and play video games!!#i really wanted to find a cool trainset#i couldn't#it was also hard to find a good play kitchen#i had one that was all primary colors#and i couldn't find anything similarly colorful#that was kinda sad#anyway i'm rambling#i hope you enjoy#sfw interaction only#moodboard#sfw agere#age regression#agere#sfw littlespace#agere moodboard#age dreaming#25ageremoodboards
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Oh my stars I need to gnaw on bones and perish in the woods because. Because some people believe Wanderer/Scaramouche has gone through an entire redemption arc. No!! He is at the beginning. He is taking his first steps forward!!! He is STICKING with the Good Guys (TM) because it's the most optimal thing to do!! It's not out of character, he knows how to play the cards he's been dealt! And y'know, overtime, he should begin to grow to care for the people of Sumeru and the region itself!!! Like that's the point!!!! He isn't there yet!!!!!! He isn't supposed to be a good guy yet!!! The reason this "redemption arc" feels "unsatisfying" is because he isn't a fully converted good guy yet!!!! Aaaaaaaa!! :(
I have my thoughts below- and uh, it's a bit long
And to those saying Hoyo should've killed him off? Please, I do want to hear why you believe that killing off Scaramouche would've been more impactful than keeping him alive. I, personally, believe that killing him off would be a disservice to what the story has been trying to get across as Sumeru's version of wisdom.
And to explain what I believe the story has been trying to get across about wisdom: Wisdom is, to Sumeru, the celebration of individuality interwoven with the celebration of community. Greater Lord Rukkhadevata says that dreams are the fruit of human wisdom, and dreams are reflections of a person's raw joys, anxieties, sorrows, and examples of the bottomless creativity the mind produces. Those combined dreams power the Akasha, which helped Rukkhadevata repel forbidden knowledge and is considered an incredible piece of technology in Teyvat. (That's a lot of weight and power they're putting into dreams!!)
Wanna see another example of how starkly different individuals come together to beat an imposing foe? LITERALLY THE SUMERU CAST. Wonder why when you played throughout the Sumeru quest line it felt a tad bit like found family?? Because that's the point!! The narrative spends time fleshing out the bonds between characters, whether old or new! We see characters like Cyno, Dehya, and Alhaitham grow to trust one another despite their tense start! We see previously established relationships like Dehya and Dunyarzad or Tighnari and Cyno! They all get closer to the Traveler as well! It is INTENTIONAL!!
Okay, now back to this puppet, Scaramouche is someone who has consistently had his own personhood denied, with his right to exist as an individual played with. His own perceived abandonment from Ei and the Fatui orchestrating the destruction of his only support group (the people of Tatarasuna) in order to be used for their own gain hammers that point home. He rejects himself by ignoring his own humanity in favor of becoming something he THINKS he's supposed to be! The Harbingers do not trust one another, and they are ready to stab their colleagues in the back from their own gain. (Which he does!! What sense of community here?? None!!)
Do you see? Scaramouche, in this state, is the antithesis of Sumeru's wisdom. Which is precisely why he fails. He fails and he falls due to the wisdom of the people of Sumeru and the joint efforts of the Sumeru cast. He, a shattered puppet once more, is forced to reckon with the fact that who he believes he should be is not who he is. And to make that realization have meaning, he must live.
There is a reason why the nation of wisdom is also the nation of dendro. To grow, adapt, and change are its core principles. So why wouldn't the Dendro Archon extend her hand to someone denied what she had been recently given- support, companionship, community. Wouldn't it be much more impactful to see a sickly sapling turn into a tree rather than letting it die? With Wanderer, we will (eventually) see the harvest of Sumeru's ideals. From rocky start to the nebulous finish, Wanderer will embody the adaptation and growth that marks Sumeru's wisdom as he steadily grows into his own individual- with many characters we know accompanying him on that journey.
I dunno how else to put this, I literally just think that having a character actively being shaped by what makes Sumeru.. Sumeru after a total rejection of it is neat. Because.. Y'know. Plants? Nurturing and growing?? I am being SO real I do not think narratively cutting off a character's ability to grow would be Sumeru's jam. Sorry for this mess of a rant, I hope my thoughts got through.. and this isn't even talking about the nuances of other characters (especially Nahida!!) but I am. Tired. So tired :')
#did not expect to type this much#hope it's coherent bc I am so sleepy as I type this#I just saw a post and. you know when you see a take on a character you enjoy#and you're just like: are we looking at the same guy???#i feel like that all the time with Wanderer#i hope all angsty teen scara and mom nahida a very *LASER BEAM*#ough so tired now#okok night night#genshin impact#wanderer#scaramouche#fig rambling tag#oops slight thing to append in tags#wanderer is literally already growing close with Nahida and#forming connections (although not necessarily deep ones) with other#sumeru characters#look at my boy grow!! you go little guy#anyways character growth takes time and wanderer is in for a journey#yippiee!!
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oh boy! time to post a new fic! I can't believe it's been *checks calendar* ....oh. uh. oops. ignore that! it's the fourth and final installment of (this) aspec reigen series, complete with a liteâą version of a couple different kinks and finally getting to touch the peen! this one's real long, folks, clocking in at about 9,500 words, so you might wanna get a nice beverage and settle in.
content notes: thigh riding, themes of consent, drunk almost sex, a discussion about the drunk almost sex in the following scene, praise kink, a very loose (literally) definition of bondage, and so so many pet names. minors please don't interact!
also on ao3!
It takes more than a couple tries for you to get settled on the bed. Youâre too close, then too far, and Reigen canât get comfy, and your hand keeps sliding out from under you, and he canât decide how he wants your leg angled, and thereâs too many clothes, then all at once so few clothes that it feels like too much at once and you hastily agree to put your shirts back on, not wanting to break the already fragile layer of quiet hope.
Finally, finally, everything is perfect.
Awkward, stilted, and a little tense, and youâre not sure how long your leg will let you keep it just barely raised like this before it cramps up, but heâs here, embarrassed but steadfast, breath coming out in shivery gasps, hovering over your thigh, one hair fisted in the back of your hair. If he tips over, thereâs no way youâre not going with.
Perfect.
His thighs shake as he holds himself up, deciding which direction he wants to move. You reach for the small of his back to steady him. "Does this count as keeping my hands out of the way?" He nods, so you test the waters by sliding your other hand up his thigh.
"As long you donât- just no direct touching. Close to is fine, just not⊠well." He moves a hand back and forth across where heâs hovering over your thigh.
âKeep off the goods. Gotcha."
"The goods? Awful. You're awful, I swear."
You slide your hand up, just barely skimming your fingernails over his hip when you catch the hem of his shirt, and his cock twitches in his boxers.
"The goods don't seem to agree."
"Oi." Despite his protests, the laughter loosens him, and he relaxes enough to lean back into your knee. âFine, fine, just stop saying goods.â
âAlright.â He raises an eyebrow. You lift both hands in surrender. âI promise! I will never again use âthe goodsâ to refer to your perfect, gorgeous, suckable-â
âI get it! I get it.â He grabs onto your shoulder - maybe in an effort to distract you, or maybe just to keep his balance - as he shifts closer. You can practically feel the heat radiating from his ears. âHere, actually, can you-? Hm.â He presses a hand against the inside of your other leg, thumb digging in as he gives a shove. He slides a knee into the newly free space between your legs, leaning forward to get a better angle. Your hands settle back on his waist.
âBetter?â
âMuch.â He lets out a little hum as he pushes his hips forward, and you have to stamp down a whimper at the feeling, his dick heavy and warm even through fabric.
âDidnât mean to just push like that, though. Sorry.â
âSâokay. Iâll survive a little manhandling, as a treat.â You hit the last âtâ sound with a click of your tongue, and he falls into your neck with a laugh. You trace patterns on his hips as he moves, tracking the motion as you press your fingers into his skin. âGod, how do you get your hips to move that smooth? Itâs sorta mesmerizing.â
âHm? Oh, I donât know, Iâm just- I wasnât thinking about it. Sâjust what f-Â ha, feels good.â His breath fans out across your collarbone, warm and fast.
âYeah? You like using my thigh, baby? No thoughts other than what feels good? Your own personal toy to get yourself off against?â
âOi.â His hips stutter once before he falls back into a slower rhythm. His fingers dig into your shoulder as he pulls you closer.
âToo much?â
âThatâs not how I think of you.â
You canât help but laugh, a light chuckle coming out in a breath against his hair. âI know, âTaka, I know.â You slide your hands under his shirt, over his stomach and up to his collarbone. âBut would it really be so bad to belong to you?â
âI-Â fuck.â Thereâs a moment of worry when he shoves you away, but then heâs scrambling for the hem of his shirt and pulling.
âAre you sure?â Itâs a formality, uttered even as youâre already reaching to help slide the fabric over his elbows, but itâs one you canât even imagine going without.
âVery.â He lifts himself off of you to push his boxers down, shifting his weight from one leg to the other as he shimmies them all the way off. The mattress shifts and pitches him over, and you hurry to grab his arm.
He crawls back over to straddle your thigh, the tip of his cock tapping lightly against your side before he leans back onto his ankles.
âDo I need to get-?â You chuck his shirt into infinity and gesture vaguely to the bedside drawer. Heâs technically never told you that he started keeping lube in there, but he hasnât made much effort to keep the secret either.
He shakes his head. âIâm close. Wonât matter.â
He tries to go back to rutting against you, anchoring his hands on your waist to tilt his hips this way and that, but something about the new angle is off, and he canât get any good contact.
âOh no, now horrible, your dick is just so hard it wonât stay down on its own.â
He clicks his tongue at you as he scoots to sit closer, flush making its way from his ears to the edges of his cheeks.
âThat gorgeous curve probably isnât helping, either. In this case, anyway. Be an absolute treat to have inside me, though.â You press your thumbs in just above his knees, encouraging him to spread his legs more, and he jumps with a squeak, hands flying to grab yours. âSorry, sorry, di-â
âNo, itâs-â He pulls your hands together, just in front of his stomach, and the tip of his cock brushes against you. For a moment, you think heâs going to pull down, but he guides your hands back to his hips, pressing them into his skin as he rolls his hips. âHere.â
He gives up and puts his hand flat over his dick, pinning it down against your leg. He lifts himself to adjust the angle, just his tip dragging along your skin until he bumps into your hip, precum rolling out in a thin line over your thigh. When he pulls back, he grinds down insistently, coating his length and covering what isnât already marked of your thigh so he can slide more easily. After a few impatient jolts of his hips, he settles back into a rhythm, smooth and fluid, and lets up on the pressure of his hand. He slings his other arm over your shoulder to pull you closer, and he falls forward to bury his face in your neck, whining into your collarbone.
He wasnât lying when he said he was close, because it only takes a few drags of his cock against you for him to seize up, body tensing before going boneless, cum rolling over his hand and onto your hip as he slumps against you in a mess of pants and sighs. You slide your hands up his back to support his full weight, pressing kisses to his hair as he catches his breath.
âJust⊠gimme a second, I can cl- get you- god, my legs.â He rolls off of you with none of his usual grace, limbs falling everywhere at once, lightly smacking your arm as he goes limp.
You laugh and push his hair back from his face. You donât bother to untangle your legs from his, accepting your fate of needing a shower later in exchange for getting to lean down to kiss his cheek.
âEh, let it dry.â
âIâm starting to think you like it more than tolerate it.â
âIf you havenât gotten the hint by now that I want you to absolutely cov-â
He gives you a shove, rolling his hand so thereâs no real force behind it, but you seize the chance to topple with a dramatic moan, one hand falling theatrically across your forehead as your eyes flutter closed.Â
âOh, stop it.â He crawls over and props himself up on his elbows. You can feel his breath fanning over your collarbone, stilted like heâs trying not to laugh. You crack one eye open, breaking into giggles when you see his forced serious expression, eyebrows pinched together and one cheek sucked into his mouth to keep the smile off his face. He breaks at your laughter, breathing out through his nose and pressing his forehead to yours. âI canât take you anywhere.â
âOh, you could take me anywhere, handsome.â You waggle your eyebrows suggestively, and he rolls onto his back with an exasperated groan. You laugh again and sit up, pulling a blanket over him so you can settle in without accidentally brushing somewhere heâd rather you didnât.
âHey, Arataka?â
âI love you, too.â
âThat, too.â You chuckle. âBut I have a real question this time.â
âOh.â He turns his head. âSure.â
âAfter you⊠when you took my hands earlier, were youâŠ?â The fleeting moment of contact between him and your hands floats through your mind. You canât help but wonder what he was thinking in the moment he hesitated, but it feels weirdly invasive to ask so bluntly. âSorry, never mind, this is a weird line of thought.â
You lay down beside him, craning your neck to rest your head on his shoulder. His hand finds yours, lacing your fingers together as his thumb smooths up your wrist.
âDo you meanâŠâ He takes a steadying breath, grip tightening almost imperceptibly. âDo you mean after the clothes came off?â
You nod. For a moment, he stills, not even breathing.
âI was⊠I wanted so badly to let you touch me. I thought if I didnât have to say it, if I could just⊠imply, then I could get around it, but,â he sighs heavily, and he sounds tired when he continues, âI panicked.â
Youâre both quiet, long enough that you startle even yourself when you finally break the silence.
âItâs not a bad idea.â
â...Panicking?â
âNo, angel. Implying.â He presses his cheek to the top of your head. âMaybe you just have to imply for a little longer.â
âIâm not following.â
âWhat if you left your hand on top of mine? That way itâs like- itâs the same as when you do it, but it sort of, hm, bridges the gap? All the sexy, none of the surprise.â
For a long moment, youâre not sure if heâs quiet because heâs thinking or because heâs falling asleep.
He hums, shoulder rolling under your head, and he pulls you tighter against his side.
+
"Okay." You shift nervously, tucking your foot underneath yourself, then deciding against it and unfolding your legs. "Walk me through the zones again."
"I'm not a city planning map." He rolls his eyes, but he takes your hand. Youâre not sure which one of you the gesture is supposed to comfort.
You shift back onto your knees.
"Here up, anything goes." He points at the middle of his chest. "But try to stay- so more like, well, from maybe..." He gestures to his collarbone and wags his finger up and down. "Here to here, really."
When he looks back at you, you can tell he's waiting for something. You settle for a small nod.
"Right. A-and then, here to here," he points from his chest to just above his hip, "Hands are fine. Doing... whatever." He steadies himself with another deep breath and rushes through the rest. "Legs, stay still, and anything... direct we'll do the- on the- yeah, got it, that's all."
You let him sit for a moment to make sure there's nothing he forgot. His grip on your hand tightens, and you swear he moves to pull you closer, but he must decide against it at the last second.
"Whose hand is going on top again? Sorry, we've swapped it so many times I can't remember if we decided."
"Oh. Right. Um." He hovers his right hand over his left, then swaps them, then swaps them again. âYours under mine.â
âGot it.â You reach for him, letting him pull your hand up to his collar. "And you know you can tell me to stop at any time?"
"You tell me that every time."
"It's important every time."
He swallows thickly and traces a circle on the back of your hand with his thumb. "Yeah. I know."
You shift to pull your legs off to the side, then cross them again, then sit back up on your knees. Gently taking the collar of his shirt in your hands, you trail one thumb along the edge of the fabric until you reach the top button. "And can I do this, or would you like to?"
He nods before realizing there were two options in your question, then points at you, then at your hands, then flashes you a thumbs up. "Yeah. Go ahead."
"Well, now hold on, I have manners. I'm not going straight for the goods." He laughs and shimmies to sit up straighter, letting his legs straighten out in front of him. "How about the pants later?"
"Uh, right, that's, I didn't think about that. I mean it would make sense that you're going to be- I mean it's not like-"
"Arataka."
"Yeah." He swallows.
"I'm not going to be offended if youâd like to take off your own pants."
He pauses, staring down at his knee. Eventually, he shakes his head. "I want you to do it."
"And your-?"
"Just do it at the same time."
"Got it." You take a steadying breath of your own. "I won't stay there, but is it okay if I straddle you for a little bit? I wa-"
His hands are pulling at your waist before you can get your legs properly unfolded, and you almost tumble over him. He laughs an apology as you move on top of him, hovering over his legs to avoid making any real contact.
You brush his bangs back from his face, following through with the motion until your fingers tangle in the shorter strands of hair at the back of his head. He tilts to follow your hand, craning his neck to keep you from pulling.
"Ready?"
He nods slightly.
"Iâd like a verbal yes for this one, lovely."
He swallows. You watch his Adam's apple bob.
"Yeah, yes.â He nods again. His hand jerks, taking yours with it, and he awkwardly lets your hand fall into his lap. You do your best not to move. âI trust you."
You drag your gaze back up to his face, searching for any last signs of reluctance. A bead of sweat trails down his temple, and youâre certain if you put your hand to his cheek youâd worry he had a fever. Sure enough, when you slide your fingers along his jaw, heâs hot to the touch, and the tips of his ears are turning brighter shades of red by the second.
He clears his throat, pushing his jaw into your palm. âAre you gonna-?â
âIn a minute.â You swipe your thumb across his bottom lip. âIâm savoring.â
He scoffs at that, the same scoff he uses when he sees somebody do something stupid in public, and you take the opportunity to catch him by surprise, surging forward to push him down onto the bed. His hands go to your shoulders on instinct but he pulls them back almost immediately, hovering awkwardly in the space between you. Using your grip on his chin, you angle his head so you can lean down and kiss him without knocking your noses together.
Once youâre sure you can support yourself without falling on him, you allow your free hand to trail down, tracing down the muscles in his neck, across his collarbone and back, finally settling on the first button of his shirt. It takes a little effort to get it undone with just one hand, but you manage it, and you allow yourself to dip down as you settle into a rhythm, lips ghosting along Reigenâs skin as you uncover more of it.
Heâs shivering, hand shaking where it hovers over yours on the last button of his shirt. When you slide your hand back up along his side, his hand falls back to the bed, pulling at a wrinkle in the sheets.
You kiss along his jaw, savoring the feeling every time his breath catches in his throat under your lips. Your hand trails down along his side, wrapping around him to hold his waist when he arches up into the press of your thumb. He hums, eyelids fluttering, and you dare to slide your hand down, ever so slightly, thumb brushing over his waistband and back onto bare skin.
He grabs for you, grasp tight around your wrist, almost painful before he slowly relaxes and drags your hand back up toward his chest. You push yourself off him, swinging your leg to kneel beside him.
âHere, letâs try this.â You guide him to sit up. Once heâs situated against the headboard, you settle in by his thigh, your knee pressing gently into his hip. One hand traces circles and patterns as you trail down to his stomach. âStill good?â
He hums, but he scrambles for your wrist again, holding on tighter and tighter the closer you get to the button on his pants.
âYouâre allowed to change your mind, yâknow. I can let you do it.â
âThatâs not- mm.â He relaxes his death grip on your arm but keeps his thumb hooked around it. After a few tries to let go completely, his head tips forward into your shoulder. âI thought I would⊠Iâm sorry.â
You shake your head and slowly pull away. âNothing to apologize for.â You cup his face with both hands and gently turn him, but he doesnât hold your gaze for long.Â
âDo you want to keep going? Should IâŠ?â
He opens his mouth, but says nothing. His expression is pinched, tight with something youâre not sure how to label. His fingers press together, thumb and index, thumb and middle, thumb and ring, thumb and pinky, over and over as you lean back, nodding softly.
âStay in bed?â Your voice is shakier than youâd like. You swear he flinches, and you clear your throat. âOr move to the couch and watch something?â
âCouch.â He nods once, stiff and harsh, and swallows thickly. âThanks.â
He presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth, and slides out of bed, starting to button his shirt back up as he wanders into the other room.
You keep nodding as if in a trance, and you follow him out.Â
+
Despite the now faint memory of some friend of a friend forcefully inviting you, there's not a single soul at the party you recognize. With the exception of a few people dancing by the kitchen, closer to the speakers, everyone has settled for taking a seat and awkwardly bobbing their head. Youâve repeated the same three lines of small talk more times than you can count, it's just cold enough that you've had the chills the whole time while still managing to feel overwhelmingly stifled, and the music is so awful you wonder how somebody hasnât tried to change it yet. But there's alcohol, the good stuff that somebody is clearly very particular about, and lots of it. You can't remember how much you've had, and that fact is enough to tell you it was probably too much, but it doesn't stop you from taking whatever the host is passing out when they wander through.
You think Reigen might be the only person doing worse than you. He looks... woozy. His face is flushed and his eyes are lidded like he might throw up, pass out, or both at any moment. At one point he took a tumble when he tried to sit down, graciously ignored by everyone else, and you had to throw your arm around his waist to keep him from sliding down the front of the couch again. He's leaning on you for support every time he moves, and if there were anything left in his can youâre sure he would be spilling it on you right now.
He's restless at the best of times, you know this, but even through the fog you can tell something is off. Not wrong exactly, but he keeps giving you this sideways glance, digging his fingers into your thigh to steady himself and then yanking his hand away, knocking his head into your shoulder and muttering something you haven't been able to make out.
He laughs - way too loudly at something you're not sure was supposed to be funny - and stands abruptly. Your hand around his waist falls limp on the couch, and he sways without the support.
"I'm going to the re- the ba- I gotta piss."
Nobody but you pays him any attention. He takes a wobbly step forward, knocking his foot into the leg of the coffee table, but he doesn't seem fazed. His knees bend at a weird angle as he shifts his weight from foot to foot, then he straightens back up and whirls around to face you. The momentum sends him tumbling back down, and you manage to catch him before his nose smashes into your jaw.
"I guess you better help me there."
"Yeah." Your voice crackles from dehydration. You have to clear your throat and try again to get a recognizable sound to come out. "Alright." You do a quick mental scan of your legs to make sure they'll support you before you motion for him to get up so you can stand. He does, grabbing your wrist and pulling with the conviction of somebody who does not need help walking.
The gears in your head start to turn.
He drags you along, glancing over his shoulder as he rounds the corner into the hallway, only stumbling once when he has to screech to a halt and back up to yank a door open. He pushes you inside, pulling the door closed behind him after he follows you in.
It's pitch black, and you're not sure if the overwhelming lemon smell is coming from Reigen or something in the room. You reach out to find him, but your fingers brush against something cold and smooth instead, and it's not until it tilts and hits you in the head that you realize it's probably a handle for something. Reigen's hand whacks into your arm and he holds on tight, fingers digging into your shoulder as he pulls you forward.
"I don't think that was the right door."
"Hm? Oh, sure." You can feel the air beside you moving until eventually his other hand finds your face, one finger dragging across your cheek until it hits your nose. "No, I- yeah, I know."
"Then wh-"
He pushes, hard and sudden. You fight to keep your balance as you adjust to the weird backwards lean you find yourself in. Reigen hisses as he pulls his fingers out from between you and the wall.
"Dumb, that was so dumb. Sorry." He fumbles for your waist to guide you backwards, and you feel his hips press against you when he reaches past your head to lean on the wall.
Everything clicks together all at once.
Your hands fly to where his waist should be. Once you find him, you're not sure if you want to shove him away or pull him in closer.
"You're super drunk. I don't know if-"
"Tha's the point." The hand on your face slides around until his thumb catches your bottom lip. He sways, like talking about it has made him remember how much he's had to drink. When he leans against you, he's heavier than normal, like he canât support his weight anymore. "Liquid courage."
"Iâm drunk."Â
"Mm. Shit." He pulls away, just barely, and he nods. "Do you mind?"
Your mouth drops open uselessly. All your thoughts feel like static, indecipherable noise screaming for you to do something, if only you could figure out what. He's squirming now, like it hurts to stay still. You realize he's whimpering at the same time you realize he's grinding his hips against your leg.
âMâfine.â
He lets out a sigh of relief and drops his hands as he shuffles around. You take the chance to stand back up. When you finally bump into each other again, he wraps his arms around you and squeezes, his breathing coming out in pants against your chest. He hooks one leg around yours, tapping his foot against your heel to bring your leg forward. You make a strangled humming sound when he grinds against your thigh.
"Hey, where's your hand?"
"My...?" You suddenly remember you have hands. You allow yourself a moment of silence for all the time you could have been holding onto him before you push one hand forward. It smacks into what you think is his stomach. "Sorry. Here."
"S'kay. Stay put." You keep your hand pressed against him as he leans backward. You're not sure when he stopped holding onto you, but one of his hands is suddenly over yours, and a loud zip cuts through the sound of you both breathing. He slides his hand down, dragging yours with it. Your fingers glide along his skin, smooth and soft, until you brush against a patch of hair.
A sobering panic cuts through you.
He must realize what he's doing at the same time you do, because you both freeze. His grip tightens. He guides your hand away from him slowly, stopping when he makes contact with your side.
"Stay... stay put."
He turns and scrambles for the door. Something falls beside you when he misses the doorknob, then you're squinting as light floods in from the hallway. You can make out the silhouette of him sprinting into the room diagonal from where you're standing, and then there's the unmistakable sound of vomiting.
Your place is only two blocks away - no more than a ten minute walk.
You call a cab service.
+
It smells like coffee.
When you try to sit up, the room spins. You end up in a sort of half sit, half lean as you grab onto the side of the mattress, willing everything to stay still. You take stock of the things that are clear enough to look at, slowly making sense of what happened once you got home.
You're laying on top of the covers, still in your clothes from last night. One shoe is in the doorway, and the other is nowhere in sight, probably somewhere closer to the entrance. The coffee smell, growing more enticing by the second, is a good sign Reigen's in the kitchen.
You slide onto the floor beside your bed, not trusting yourself to stand up without falling just yet, to rummage for more comfortable clothes. Once you manage to get changed, you stand up slowly, and make your way to the kitchen.
Reigen must have grabbed a set of pajamas at some point last night, though you can't remember when. His back is turned to you; he's lazily stirring something on the stove. Two steaming cups of coffee sit on the counter beside him. Before you can decide whether you want to say something and risk startling him, he seems to sense you standing there, and he turns around with a weak smile.
"Hey."
"Morning?" It's both a greeting and a question, because you have no idea what time it is.
"Yeah." He lets out a breathy chuckle. "How, um, how you feeling?"
Your head is throbbing so bad your teeth hurt, your legs and back are sore, and you have a looming sense of guilt.
"I think I should be asking you that."
"I'm fine, really." He clicks off the fire and reaches for a bowl. "I told you, I felt basically back to normal after I- well, um, you know. Thanks again, by the way, for car- for carrying me."
You nod softly, feeling a little useless as he hands you what looks and smells like a very delicious soup.
"Reigen, I am so-" "I didn't mean-"
He reaches for a second bowl. "You first." When you start to shake your head, he rolls his wrist in a "go on" motion. "Please. I'm not actually sure how to say mine yet."
"Right." You swallow thickly, fidgeting with your spoon. Deep in thought, you miss Reigen slipping past you. He clears his throat and gestures to the seat across from him. You slide into the chair. Your spoon clanks against the bowl as you set it down. "I, um. Shit, I'm so sorry."
He seems surprised, a spoonful of soup halfway to his lips.
"What for?"
"Wh-" You blink. "Every... thing? I- I know sorry doesn't even cover it, but I-"
"Whoa, hey, okay." He shakes his hand in front of him. "Never mind, I'll go first, because I think you got the wrong idea and I'm not gonna let you apologize for anything that happened."
"But you trusted me, and I-"
"And I still do. That's- that was the whole- look, I-" He sighs. His spoon clanks as he sets it down, abandoned in favor of wringing his hands together. "I set you up."
"You-?"
"I didn't mean to! I thought- It was stupid, and I should have just told you what I was trying to do, I know , but I- I wasnât exactly thinking straight, and I thought if I could speed up the process, then- I mean, there's only so many times you can put up with almost getting to- if I could- ugh, sorry, hang on."
He pinches the bridge of his nose. You swear your headache is reacting sympathetically, because pain shoots between your temples, dull but persistent. He goes to retrieve the coffees from the kitchen, just cool enough to drink, and you down some as soon as he hands you a mug.
"You've been so patient, and I know you would never do anything I didn't want, but I... I keep overthinking it. And I thought it would be the perfect excuse to... to not have to think about it at all. I mean that's- that's just what people do at parties, right, and- I mean, it was... ugh." He sits back down, his posture unnaturally rigid. He chooses his next words carefully, pausing between words as if heâs testing out different sentences in his head. "I trusted you⊠to not take it further than I was comfortable with⊠more than I trusted myself to⊠not panic over nothing. So, I- I saw the chance and I..." He gestures weakly, hand falling back to the table with a soft thump.
"Liquid courage."
He takes a sip of his coffee and slumps forward, holding his chin with one hand.
"You... got drunk on purpose?"
"Not originally, but, uh."
You nod slowly. Your stomach grumbles, and you realize you haven't actually eaten any of your soup. You take a reluctant spoonful, chewing slowly as you take everything in.
"When you froze up, it- I realized how little I had thought it through. I- it wasn't fair to you. You didn't do anything to- I never should have put you in that position in the first place."
"I... would have appreciated a warning, yeah."
"Sorry." He runs his hand through his hair and leaves it against the back of his neck. "I'm really sorry."
"Apology accepted." Reigen relaxes into his chair. As he stretches his legs out, one of his feet bumps against your ankle, and you laugh softly. "I'm still sorry, too. I should have asked more questions. And I didn't... I think I noticed something was wrong but I didnât realize it was that frustrating for you. Before, I mean. I never wanted to make you feel like you had to do something like that."
"It's exclusively a me problem, I promise. I thought something would have worked by now. I don't... I don't really know whatâs getting in the way." He shakes his head, breathing out sharply through his nose.
âI mean, literally speaking, your hands.â You laugh and take another sip of your coffee. He tilts his head. âBecause, you know, y-you always grab my hand before I-?â He stares, unblinking. âSorry, too soon to joke, probably,â you mutter into your cup, taking another sip just to have something to do.
When he moves again, itâs with a jerky start, sitting up and leaning forward. âMy hands.â
âYeah, I-â
âNo, my hands.â He throws his elbows onto the table. The bowls clatter and his coffee sloshes; his chair scrapes against the floor as he stands. His wrists come together in front of you, palms up and fingers curled loosely, as he stares, silent, waiting for a glimpse of recognition to cross your face. It takes a moment, but when he finds it, he grins. âMy hands.â
âIf you want to stop-â
âSaying so has always been enough.â
You stand, leaning to match his eye level. You consider him, searching for hesitation, but you find none.
You take his hand, and you start pulling.
+
âThis is⊠mine?â An old black tie lays across Reigenâs palms, the ends hanging loosely over his thighs.
âYeah, you left it here. A while ago, I guess.â You shrug. âYou never really liked it, though, plus youâre here all the time anyway, so I didnât get around to giving it back, and itâs just been here ever since.â
As you slide the drawer closed, he catches a glimpse of an old t-shirt he left on his first night in your place, folded neatly in the back corner, under a small collection of his dress socks.Â
There are signs of him everywhere, really, if he looks. His toothbrush in your bathroom, a blanket he bought you for your birthday draped over the back of the couch, his favorite sweater of yours hanging on the handle of the closet, never out of service long enough to make it in with the rest of your clothes.
Heâs struck with the realization itâs not just in your things, your home, but in you, the way you gesture with an extra dramatic flourish that wasnât there before, the unwavering, tight smile that settles on your face when you talk to clients, the softness in your voice when you welcome the kids into the office, quietly clearing a table for them to do homework on, the flashes of movement in the kitchen as you dash back and forth whenever you make recipes he taught you - favorites from when things were harder and uncertain and cooking was his escape, before even the hardest parts of his life were laced with joy.
Heâs wearing off on you.
Heâs known it for a while, but heâs never put it all together like this, never seen it all so neatly represented in a single black tie, satin and unassuming and full of possibility. You kick your abandoned shoe out of the way, pushing the door shut with a soft click that startles him just enough to draw his attention.
âStill okay?â
He wonders how youâve worn off on him, which parts of him werenât there before that he doesnât notice, canât notice.
âYeah.â He nods. âIâm ready.â
He smooths his thumb over the fabric, watching it wrinkle and crease where he applies pressure. It slides across his palms, dragging slowly as you wrap one end around your hand, until heâs left with empty air, hands outstretched between you.
He feels light.
You take his hands in yours, turning them in toward each other, and start to lay the tie across his wrists.
âOh, wait!â You pull back right away, and he holds up one finger. âNot- we should take my shirt off first.â
âJesus, you scared the shit out of me!â You laugh and settle back onto your knees. âYes, okay, letâs- yeah.â
Reigen stops halfway up. The fabric stays bunched when he lets go, and he pulls your hands to the exposed patch of skin. He can feel the tie, still wrapped around your palm, pressing against his side, cold and smooth, and he swallows thickly. As you drag your hands up, it slides up with you, and a shiver wracks through him when you finally pull the shirt off his arms.
He cups your face, pulling you into a kiss, fingers coming to press at the back of your neck to keep you against him as he topples backward. You catch yourself on one hand, the end of the tie flipping to rest over his shoulder as you climb to straddle him. Heâs insistent, both hands tangling in your hair, little sighs and puffs of breath against your mouth as he refuses to pull away for air.
You press a kiss to his cheek to soothe the loss when you lean back. He drapes his arms over your shoulders, locking his fingers together behind your head.
âWe could stay like this? My hands are⊠close-ish together.â
âI canât see behind me to tie it, but,â you pull his hands around your head, âIâm sure we can figure it out after that.â
He nods. You turn his hands back toward each other and his fingers curl, knuckles pressing together as he relaxes. You drape the tie around his wrists, trying a few different ways of looping it but not finding anything youâre satisfied with.
âSorry. I just wanna make sure you can get out if you need.â
âItâs alright. I like the attention.â
You freeze, a wobbly grin taking shape as your face heats up.
ââTaka, Iâm supposed to be the composed one!â
âIâm just trying to be honest!â He flexes his wrists, pressing his knuckles together to crack them.
âDonât worry,â you press both ends of the tie between his hands and motion for him to hold them still, âI like giving you attention.â You fold the middle of the tie over to make two loops and start twisting them in on themselves. âAnd I wanna hear about it as much as you can bear.â
âYou seem plenty composed to me.â He pinches his thumb between two fingers and squeezes.
âQuick recovery. I learned from the best.â You wink and put your fingers through the loops. âHere, hands in here.â
He flattens his hands to squeeze them through, stopping to let you shimmy the tie the rest of the way over. You hold the ends of the tie and give a quick tug before tying them together.
âThere, itâll have to do.â You slip a finger in each loop, making sure thereâs enough room to be comfortable without him being able to slip out without meaning to. âItâs a little loose, so donât pull too hard, okay?â
âSure.â He folds his elbows down, letting his hands come to rest on his chest. He jerks one hand up toward his hair, pulling his other hand with it, and the tie snaps taut. He has the courtesy to look sheepish. âIâll try.â
You roll your eyes, smile still wide.
âHands above your head, please.â
âHm?â
âIâd like to get at your neck.â You press up on his elbows, and he unfolds his arms. âThose were in the way.â
âO-oh. Right.â
You lean down, tilting his chin up with one hand, and press a kiss to his throat, savoring the way it moves as he swallows. You trail down until you reach his stomach, dragging your tongue along his skin on the way back up. He exhales sharply, breath moving your hair as you get closer to his face. He forces out a laugh, and he rolls one shoulder.
You glance up. The tie is already starting to come loose, untwisting in the middle, but his hands are clasped together, the tie held in place between his wrists, fingers over the ends.
You kiss him, quick and breathless, and slip your fingers under his waistband. When his breath hitches, you smooth your thumb along the bone there, a reassurance you wonât move yet. You can feel him tense under you, pressing up into your touch, then slowly settling back onto the mattress.
Youâre both reluctant to acknowledge the fact that you have to get off of him to take his pants off. You do your best to shimmy them under you, and he lifts his hips to help, but you need both hands to make sure his boxers stay on for now, and you want to make sure he can move his legs, so eventually, begrudgingly, you climb off him.
He takes the opportunity to stretch, his back arching off the bed as you throw his pants off somewhere to worry about later.
âOoh, pretty. Think you can do that for me again?â You press a thumb to the inside of his thigh, at the edge of where his boxer leg has ridden up, and he jumps, hips rolling against your touch.
âTrickery.â He squirms, a whine that refuses to come out shining through in his voice. âNot fair.â
âDonât worry, youâll get plenty more chances.â You trail your fingers up his thigh, along the âvâ of the bone, up his stomach. He shivers when you trail back down, your fingers catching on the waistband of his boxers to drag it over his skin before letting go, settling your hand lightly over the bulge in the fabric. Itâs slightly damp against your skin, and Reigen chokes back a moan when you press down.Â
You pull, grinding your palm down on his cock as the waistband moves until you can see the base of it, then you slide back up, tracing the outline of him with your fingers. When he whimpers, youâre too slow to hide your grin, and he glares halfheartedly.
âHaving fun down there?â
âOh, lots, thanks.â You slip your thumb below the elastic. âSeems like you are, too.â
âHm.â
âSorry, what was that?â You lift your hand with mock alarm, and he scrambles to reach for you, slowly lowering his arms to his chest when he sees your smile.
âYes.â
âSo, just to make sure, you are having fun?â Itâs just as sarcastic as it is serious, and he seems to take it in equal measures, because he scoffs at the same time he nods. Both hands are on his hips now, both thumbs in his waistband, and you pull up gently to get him to lift his hips.
âGood boy.â
Youâre not sure you would have felt it if you werenât holding him, but he definitely shudders, trembling where your fingers press into his skin.
âArataka.â
âHmm?â He sounds breathless, and his chest heaves with effort, the rest of him as still as he can keep it.
âShould I keep calling you a good boy?â
âUm. If you want.â He jerks his hips up, and you take the hint to slide his boxers off, keeping an eye on his face as you do. You climb between his legs and lean over him, wrapping your hand slowly around his cock, firmly but gently, your thumb over the tip.
He squeaks, and he tenses, but he doesnât reach for your hands.
âYouâre doing so well, âTaka.â He swallows, and he shifts his hands, twisting the tie so he can lay his arms closer to his hair. âSuch a good boy for me.â Precum oozes out of his slit, and you feel it roll down your hand.
âMhm.â You lean back on your heels. âHow about this? You tell me what feels good, and every time you do,â you pull your thumb down, spreading the precum along his length, âIâll let you know just how much I appreciate it. Sound good?â
He nods, and you stop moving.
âCan I hear you say it?â
âYes,â he breathes, pressing his wrists together, âyes, sounds good.â
âGood job.â When you lean to kiss him, grip tightening to keep his dick down against his stomach, his knuckles brush over your hair. âSo perfect.â
You start slow, focusing more on touching every inch of him then keeping any sort of rhythm. When you trail up the vein on the underside, he shivers, and he gasps when you squeeze the base, and his hips jerk up when you pass over his slit, one leg coming up to press his ankle against your side. Itâs not until you slip your other hand around him, though, arm passing through the space created by the bend of his knee to settle on his outer thigh, that he says anything.
âFuck, that, more of that. P-please.â
âThis hand?â You press your fingers into his thigh. He presses back.
âYeah. I need⊠just, hold onto me.â
âOkay. Yeah, of course, sweetheart.â You scoot closer to wrap your hand tighter around his leg, spreading your legs to slip your knee underneath him. Once he relaxes, the full weight of his leg on yours, you press a kiss to his knee. âGood boy.â
âShit,â he laughs, squirming closer to you. âSânot close enough.â
âLet me try something, then.â You slide backwards, reluctantly letting his leg fall to the bed, and you shimmy onto your stomach. When you pull his leg over your shoulder, he immediately hooks his ankle into your back and lets out a breathy moan. The pressure makes it a little harder to reach back around his thigh, but he relaxes into it easier, and the view is incredible. âThere you go, perfect.â
You start up a little faster this time, twisting your wrist as you move up and down, and he bucks up into your hand. You risk a kiss to his thigh and his hands fly to your hair, the ends of the tie flowing down against your cheek.
âSorry, too much?â
âNot enough.â His voice is scratchy now, and he gives a little tug once he gets a hold of you. âCan you, donât put it- but, closer?â
âYou want me here instead?â You press a kiss to the underside of his cock, flipping the loose ends of the tie out of the way to lay across his hip.
âY-yes. Yes, fuck.â
âGladly.â Between words, you pepper kisses along his shaft, following the trail of your hand up and down. âThank you for letting me do this for you. You look so beautiful like this, feeling so good.â
He starts to make a noise of protest, but it quickly shifts into a stifled groan when you press a kiss to his tip, just barely letting your tongue drag across his slit as you pull away.
He whines and bucks his hips to follow you, and you canât help but let an incredulous laugh slip out. âAlright, love, Iâm gonna give you a choice, okay?â
He swallows thickly, then nods.
âOption one, you can tell me exactly how you want me to make you come. If you want my hand or my mouth or to go faster or slower or anything at all you just have to say the word. But I wonât do anything you donât tell me, so youâll have to say exactly what you want.â
His breathing is ragged, and he twitches in your grasp. âAnd option two?â
You grin and lean over him, propping yourself up on one hand. âI do whatever makes you the loudest, and if you stop making those pretty noises for me, I stop.â He seems to flinch at that, and you brush his hair back. âJust for a little while.â
He takes a shaky breath, eyes fluttering closed, and he pulls his arms in and down to drape one across his forehead. The tie was never really secure in the first place, but after quite a bit of pulling and flailing, itâs fully undone by now, nothing but luck and stubborn determination holding the loops in place around Reigenâs wrists.
âBoth options, of course, come with all sorts of praise and admiration.â You slip a finger under the fabric and give a light tug. He lifts his hands to let the tie slide free.
When he opens his eyes, a shudder running down his spine, he sees you absent-mindedly tying the tie around your neck, uneven and loose, hanging down between you to brush against his stomach. Heâs sure you just needed somewhere to put it, something to do with your hands, but it flips a strangely possessive switch somewhere inside him. Not because heâs seeing you in his clothes - heâs had the privilege of that many times before - but because youâve taken the thing that was supposed to restrain his ability to fuck up the situation, taken something he left safe for you to keep track of without even realizing heâd done it, taken the symbol of his presence in your space and your time and your life, and youâve put it on without a second thought. He thinks of his misguided reasoning that got you into this situation, that he trusts you with him more than he trusts himself, and he knows what he wants.
For once, words are failing him, which just makes the choice even easier.
âSecond one.â
Your eyebrows raise a little, like youâre surprised at his answer, and he almost takes it all back, but then youâre grinning and leaning down to cup his jaw, kissing him like heâs giving you the only air you could ever breathe, and he moans into your mouth.
You lean away just enough to pull in a gasp of air, fingers sliding to tangle into the base of his hair.
âJust like that, gorgeous.â
He laughs, sucking in a shaky breath as you wrap your hand around him again. It pinches into a sort of strained whimper as he starts to quiet himself and thinks better of it, and you start moving.
âThatâs it, good boy, just let me take care of everything.â
For all he got into his head before, breaking the seal of touching him seems to have removed any last bits of hesitation, because he relaxes into your touch almost immediately. Your experimenting earlier left you with a good idea of what will get the best noises out of him, and he doesnât hold back. Youâre silently thankful, not only because you get to hear him, but also because youâre not sure you could have followed through on your threat of stopping. And if heâs exaggerating for your sake, all clipped moans and raspy mumbling and bucking hips, well, youâre not going to complain.
After a particularly tight stroke up his cock and a brush of teeth up the inside of his thigh, he pulls one arm over his mouth, pushing it against his lips with his other hand. Youâre still deciding if that counts as muffling his sounds enough to slow down when he bites his wrist and yelps, a loud, desperate, frantic noise that seizes what little of your attention isnât already on him. His head tips back as he struggles to prop himself up on one elbow, hand flipping to clamp down over his mouth, and you can see the bite mark, lines pressed into the pale skin just below the jut of bone where palm meets wrist. It takes you a minute to realize heâs saying something, your brain struggling to piece his noises together into words.
âCan I have your hand?â You hum, scrambling to extract your hand from his leg. âI just- I need,â he opens and closes his hands, âsomething.â When you hold your hand up blindly toward him, he takes it quickly and holds on tight, fingers lacing together with yours. He gives a few tugs, and you hurry to sit up.
âPlease, I need- I canât take it anymore.â He looks frantic, eyebrows pinched together and his chest heaving with ragged, shaky breaths. His hips buck wildly, quick and shallow into your curled fingers. You realize youâve forgotten to keep moving as you were watching him, and you quickly correct your mistake, reveling in the shiver that racks through him as your thumb swipes over his tip.
Heâs begging now, your name falling out in pieces between gasps and cries; heâs still tugging at your hand like you canât get close enough, pressing his lips to your jaw like he canât quite remember how to leave kisses there. He pitches his hips up and presses against you, knees coming together to press into your sides, pinning your hand against your torso as he lets out a final shuddering whimper.
He comes across your fingers, his whole body tense as he holds himself up, back arched and head rolled to the side. He moves to wrap his arms around you, forgetting that his elbow is supporting him, and he pulls you down with him as he falls the short distance to the mattress.
You do your best to roll off him without letting go of him during the aftershocks, but youâre not exactly paying attention to where youâre still holding, and he yelps again from the overstimulation. You yank your hand away with half an apology, smoothing your hand up his side as you lift yourself up on your other arm.
âNono, wait, donât-â He scrambles to grab you wherever he can, and you intercept him before he can smack you across the face.
âItâs okay, âTaka, sâokay. Iâm not going anywhere. I just didnât wanna crush you. Letâs sit up so you can get some water, alright? All that noise can really make your throat sore, I know.â You slip your hands under him, one at the small of his back and one between his shoulders, gently lifting him toward the headboard. âThatâs it. Youâre okay. I gotcha.â
Once heâs upright, a glass of water in two shaky hands, you lean over the side of the bed to fumble for a washcloth. When he doesnât slow down on his own, you start to reach for the glass, but he pulls away for a big gulp of air before you can.
âHow you feelinâ?â
He doesnât answer right away, leaving you to fidget with the cloth, slowly reaching for his thigh. He lets his eyes slide closed as you start to wipe him off, smoothing an apologetic thumb over his hip when he hisses from the sensitivity. You wipe your hand on a mostly clean corner before you chuck it in the general direction of the hamper, silently relieved when it makes it in.
âI think I died.â His hands are still shaking as he goes to set the glass on your nightstand, and you gingerly take it from him, lifting yourself up to set it on the far corner where neither of you can accidentally knock it off later. âI understand you now.â
âYou didnât die, I promise.â You allow yourself a smirk and pull a blanket up from the end of the bed. âThatâs high praise, though.â
âYouâre high praise.â
âYouâre the one that liked it so much.â
He rolls his eyes, too tired to argue. As you pull yourself up the bed to sit beside him, he leans over, one hand sliding behind you to rest on your hip. Now that he doesnât have the distraction of everything else, you can tell heâs starting to think, because his ears are tinting pink and heâs fidgeting with a string on the edge of the blanket.
âDoesnât mean I wasnât happy to oblige.â
You scoop his hand into yours, leaving the blanketâs seams to live another day, and examine the bite mark on his wrist.
âI canât believe I did that.â He scoffs, shaking his head a little as you turn his arm over. âThe hell was I thinking?â
âObviously you werenât, which is both the point and very hot, so hush.â He turns away stubbornly, but he looks pleased. âYou could probably say a spirit did it. Biting seems like an evil ghost thing to do, right?â
âWith clearly human teeth?â
âMaybe it⊠stole them?â
He laughs, pulling away from your grip to get comfortable against your side. Just as you start to drift off, soothed by the sound of his breathing slowing and his weight settling on you as he relaxes, you feel his fingers walking down your hip, making their way to your thigh. You crack one eye open, and he looks away with obviously fake innocence.
âWhere you going with that hand, darling?ïżœïżœ
He smiles, bright and daring, as his fingers dig in. âYour turn?â
You consider it. Youâre not quite capable of fully ignoring how turned on seeing him like this has made you. Thereâs a bit of nervous energy, buzzing over whatâs left of your hangover, excitement, the joy that bubbles up in your chest at seeing him smiling at you like that, everything coming together in an overwhelming, swirling feeling of wanting whatever he will give you. But thereâs something else, a calm undercurrent to it all, coating the emotion in quiet and directing it all back to a single point, solid and unwavering and right .
More than anything, you are content.
He sees your expression and laughs, must know what youâre going to say the moment you decide, because he mouths the words along with you as he pulls his hand back up to your hip.
âMaybe next time.â
#reigen arataka x reader#reigen x reader#my writing#it's been so long i forget how i tag things lol#hey bestie you're for sure gonna get a notif for this and i apologize in advance lsjkdfk#thank you so so much to everyone that stayed through the hiatus#i have been reading all the kind comments and asks and even though i don't respond they absolutely make my day#i was trying to avoid the internet as much as possible and it kinda... just stayed that way for a long time#if you're worried about this being the âlastâ aspec reigen pls don't panic#there's a more detailed ramble on ao3 but basically there will be more of these two goofs in love#(and probably a third goof in love)#but i wanna change some stuff and it'll be easier to do that in a new series#since this wasn't really meant to be a series in the first place weirdly#so basically it may be slow going but this isn't the end#i'm dropping this and then going to bed so i'll see y'all in the morning i hope you enjoy!!#i have.... so much to catch up on.....
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Done with our favorite Spider-Boy! Spiderling? Spider... What was his name again?
Avengers paper cutout 6/?
#avengers paper cutout project#art#sorry it's been FOREVER since I did a thing for this series lol#lowkey I've had this done for like... a month... maybe 2 months...?#and just didn't post it because I wasn't 100% happy with it#but well. when someone has a bad day and you want to cheer them up a little you can't be chasing perfection I guess#I also want to do more bird art soon!#just haven't been feeling creative lately due to Certain Life Events:tm:#but today was the first decent day I've had in a while where I didn't go home and then immediately fall into a doom scroll spiral on the co#the couch#stupid tag word limit#anyway yeah hopefully you'll be hearing a little more from me soonish#and by soonish i mean like another 2 weeks probably...#look even when I'm feeling decent I am SLOOOOOOW at this lmao#uhh anyway there's only natasha left out of the OG6 so she's up next#actually probably similar color scheme for peter assuming it'll be a black gun on the hourglass bg#but I kinda hate the black lol it makes the edges look so bad!#we'll see maybe I'll find a picture of her with a different looking gun and use that as an excuse#enough tag rambling I need to post this and then get ready for bed lol#hope y'all enjoy my silly little art#which i guess is kinda seasonally appropriate now??#IGNORE MY RAMBLING UP THERE THIS WAS MY SECRET PLAN ALL ALONG MHM MHM I PLANNED THIS SO WELL
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TO be honest. I donât understand what it means when people say Merlin was Arthurâs bane. Mayhaps I misunderstand but. Arthur was a bit of an assassination magnet (not to mention all those magical creatures and bandits... so many bandits), and Merlin actively prevented Arthur's death for years, which would have occured without him anway in the very first episode. I can see why one might argue that Merlin was just delaying the inevitable, or that he didn't succeed in keeping Arthur safe until Arthur could enact the golden age, but certainly I donât see how he could have been Arthurâs bane.
Also, itâs implied in the last episode that the golden age does occur, but under Guinevere. Which makes sense as she knew Merlin was the sorcerer and that she was pleased about it (and I recall it was confirmed in interviews), so I also donât follow the twin train of thought that Merlin was his own bane or even Camelotâs. Camelot was already bane-d(?) under Uther. But partly because of Merlin's steady friendship, Arthur matured into a king who was kinder than his father. He also actively sought magic's aid on multiple occasions, so he knew magic had potential for good (like healing his queen) without Merlin needing to tell him about his magic.
I don't think it's fair to say Camelot's laws on magic remaining relatively static was because no one close to Arthur came out as having magic. There was still much risk in that, and for Merlin a lot at stake, not just his life. A law change was still possible (and almost seemed to be set up that way) without Arthur needing someone he was personally close to having to do the work to humanize it for him (in the sense that the episodes with the druids, the druid boy with Elyan, and the dolma seemed like they were pointing to a law change because Arthur sees the diversity of magic and those who have it).
At worst Merlinâs efforts didnât change the status quo, but we do have things indicating that they did. And Merlin was not single-mindedly serving Arthur at the expense of everyone else. He saved Camelot as a whole multiple times. He was also very willing to stick out his neck for many others even during the height of his anxiety and agitation in season 5. (Also only being slightly silly when I say this, but he was also THE wingman for Arthur when he was getting with Gwen, so in a way Merlinâs help led to their courting being a success and thus contributed to her being in a great position to change the laws. so personally I give points to Merlin for that). Most of the decisions centering Arthur's safety seemed to stem from the fear that Albion would crumble before it began if Arthur were to die, so he tried his best to prevent that from happening in any way he knew. (Like, when Arthur is dying, Merlin asks "So I failed?" regarding the whole golden age thing, which I think is telling that the prophesy and his role in it was still VERY much at the forefront of Merlin's mind).
And this is a digression but I know people think Merlin should have done more for Camelot, or for folks with magic (like, as a revolutionary or something akin), which I understand but no one reached out to network with him really? It'd require resources, people (always confused why there weren't a whole bunch more folks offering Merlin material/intellectual/emotional support if they thought he should be the one to bring about the golden age. all he was told was that the forseen way it actually happens succesfully is through Arthur), time (I doubt itâd have been much of a âquickerâ way necessarily), and incredible planning + foresight if it's meant to be something that works out effectively + long-term. Okay I think I've digressed enough now. This is a whole seperate thought that I don't think I'm gonna do any justice here lol, and I'm already rambling, so I'll stop now :,)
But anyway, in terms of being his own or Arthurâs bane, we know Arthur will return, and we donât know how Merlin spent his years. His magic can play with time and maybe he learns how to control that, or he could have entered a stasis like in various legends, etc etc etc. And I mean it is tragic on many levels, and itâs sad we didnât see Arthurâs arc completed, and that Merlin sacrificed so much for a goal that didn't get much acknowledgment by the show at the end, but still. I donât think Merlin was Arthurâs bane, or Camelotâs, or his own.
#I am always writing things out when I'm SLEEPY so my bad if this doesn't make sense or is redundant. it's def all over the place đ#being sleepy makes me so sympathetic to merlin like..... he must have been sleepy too#also. sorry this is yet another post not gushing about Merlin on my side blog made just to gush about Merlin#this will probably happen again BUT#you must understand thereâs always an undercurrent of gushing in all my posts#bc I love Merlin and enjoyed the show even though it does make me. feel things. that I wish it didnât#BUT ALSO will make a tag for this for easy blocking in case anyone wants to block these rambles!#uhhhh the tag will be⊠this one:#đč#I hope blocking emoji tags works... willing to hear suggestions on this LOL#(maybe I'll clean this up later but I just wanted to get some thoughts down!)#okay I'm done now back to imagining Merlin in starry court sorcerer robes while doing magical shenanigans :D#merlin#bbc merlin
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recently i've been thinking about rowan omondi in terms of the "supportive black best friend" trope. i've had this idea for a while that it would be interesting to see a story that deals specifically with the psychological effects of being the designated "support friend", especially in cases where that character addressing/expressing their own emotions and advocating for themself would be stigmatised because of their race... and obviously, rowan fits into this neatly, actively repressing and refusing to talk about his feelings because he isn't usually given this sort of support by his friends, it's usually him who's supporting them. and i guess on a metatextual level, once he begins to address his own emotional repression and step down from that support role, you could view it as him becoming cognisant of his own role as the "supportive black best friend".
#iwbft#rowan omondi#this post is absolutely cracked because it's my personal theory/lens/interpretation/story idea that i have literally never shared before#and then applied (as if it's a well-established interpretation/lens) to someone who is. not the main character of his respective work#and listen. we all love rowan. i just think ive thought about him way more than most people#i'm thoroughly uncertain of whether i've explained myself properly here. idk how much the conjecture of rowan's arc post-iwbft#is common sense to other people. and stuff like that#BUT! i hope you enjoy this post nonetheless#i would also like to say this isn't a criticism of IWBFT. i dont think alice was at all ignorant of the role she was writing rowan into#by making him an overly-supportive friend who also happens to be black#(in fact i think the specific way rowan's emotional repression displays itself is a deliberate subversion of what would otherwise be#a very archetypical role for a black character)#yea. im just positing a lens im not levying criticism at IWBFT or alice#osemanverse#thunder rambles#(these thoughts actually first came about when corinna brown was first talking abt tara's arc in s3. and then i thought about it again#when i watched timestalker and jacob anderson's character basically just gives up being the support character at the end LMFAO)
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With See Your Love out and Blue Canvas of Youthful Days coming back next week and The Nipple Talk airing next month, just wanted to reiterate that I am open to questions if you ever have any doubt re: the translation and wanted another human's take.
#i probably will have some notes#just not sure how timely i can be#just hoping i can fill some translation gaps so you can enjoy the shows a bit more#see your love#blue canvas of youthful days#the nipple talk#this one rambles#this one translates#<-thats the tag i use for all my translation notes
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nina please come collect your man before he starts giving the villagers heart palpitations
#my art#mine#fanart#genshin impact#kabukimono#scaramouche#genshin#people on twitter were drawing lolita kabu so i decided i had to try#and then i spent a million years on it#because i forgot i had to actually draw all those ruffles#damn ruffles.#lolita kabukimono#thatâs so not a tag#oh well#also fuck historical accuracy heâs a pretty princess#my favorite little dress up doll#this is not the raiden shogun she would never wear this ever#i know they look the same but thatâs not my fault#blame hyv#also i feel like niwa would pass out if he saw this#oh also also trans kabukimono/scaramouche#but thatâs just canon#so#ALSO BALL JOINTED DOLL KABUKIMONO#BECAUSE HYV ARE COWARDS#anyways done rambling hope you enjoy the art#xoxo#bye
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Time was at a standstill. Vegas was holding his breath without noticing, and continued to hold it when he did - he was afraid of what would happen if he exhaled loudly enough to draw attention to himself. His gaze was shifting between Pete and the man who was standing before them in the doorway, blocking their entrance. Vegas had never seen him before, but even so, he recognized Pete in him enough to know who he was. A dangerous aura surrounded him. There was an edge to his presence that Vegas would only come across people of certain circles. He was a fighter. A muay khao. Pete's father. Shame coursed through Vegas' body, smearing his skin, settling in his lungs, rendering him speechless. I thought he was dead, he wanted to tell Pete if he could. He wanted to scream at him, I thought you killed him. Pete was the one who broke the stillness. As if awakened by something, he took a half-step back and made a motion with his arms, almost raising them to his chest, but not quite. In an instant, Pete reverted into the pet Vegas had been keeping at the safehouse, bound by handcuffs and afraid of his belt hitting flesh and drawing blood. A lump formed in Vegas' throat. "Have you stopped practicing? Your form is off." The uncanny similarities between Pete and his father appearance-wise didn't mean a thing when it came to their voices. Vegas shivered. Was this what Pete would sound like in a few decades? (Were these the condescending words he'd choose to spew? Was Pete going to embody his father? Was Vegas embodying his?) "What are you doing here?" Pete whispered. "They let me out for a few days, so I came here to collect some money. Imagine my surprise when I found out my offspring left the job someone found him worthy enough of doing to... do what exactly? Yaai didn't want to tell me." He crossed his arms, waiting for an answer. Vegas didn't know what he was allowed to say. If he was allowed to say anything at all. "It's none of your business." "I'd say it very much is my business, as well as yaai's business who was dependent on the money you were making being some rich asshole's human shield." A choked sound scratched Vegas' throat. He didn't like getting reminded of Pete being the main family's bodyguard, even though he stopped being one mere months ago. Especially like this. That was the first time Pete's father stopped looking at his son and turned his head to look at Vegas. For a moment, there seemed to be recognition in his eyes. Did he know who Vegas was? Did he care? A snort came out of his mouth. He leaned on the door. "Oh, I see how it is." He laughed, scratched his neck. "I never expected you to whore yourself out for money. Tell me, is it preferable to the path I carved out for you?" Vegas could sense the disgust in his voice. He could also see it on Pete's face. He was too astonished to share it, but not enough to be unable to speak. "Khun, there has been some misunderstanding-" "Don't bother. I can recognize a faggot when I see one." Pete's movements were too fast for Vegas to stop him. A direct jab to the nose; his father fell like a pack of cards, groaning like a wounded animal. Surprisingly, no blood - Pete held back. Vegas didn't know what to think about that. "That was a pathetic attack, even for you." "Get up." "We're not in the ring, son." Pete growled. Vegas could see his hands trembling as he was keeping them in the air, maintaining an offensive stance. "That never stopped you before." "You were too young to understand what I was doing back then. What I was preparing you for." Pete was silent. "The world isn't kind. It'll fuck you over one way or another." He got up, spat on the ground. "You still haven't learned a thing. You're too old to afford being naive." He turned around, and without sparing a look at Pete again, said: "Now get the fuck out of my house." (For @musictooth, whose posts about Pete's father have reignited my passion for this specific concept and for @wretchedamaranth, whose comments on my writing are always lovely and precious â€ïž)
#tw slur#vegaspete#pete saengtham#snippet#yu is writing#I started writing this today while waiting for my bus to arrive and wrote most of it on public transport <33#(hopefully it doesn't show lol)#there's a lot of context missing here but basically: VP visit yaai and a wild father appears#I didn't have space to include her unfortunately but just imagine her in the background with a sad look on her face#which is mostly fixed on Vegas :))#for no reason at all :))#due to a certain someone who I won't name (đ€) I mayyy turn this into a fic? Maybe?#because 1. I did have a similar idea a year or so ago but never did anything with it and 2. this concept NEEDS to be explored more come on#because in my mind Vegas and Pete can't go to yaai's house until/unless Pete's father leaves#all their stuff is in her house#and they only have Vegas' car with which they traveled there#and Bangkok is too far away to go back now in the middle of the night (yes this happens at night time)#so basically what I'm saying is: VP will spend their night in the car :)#I'm sure the combination of an agitated Pete and a tired Vegas who's also equating Pete with his father due to their external similarities#will be a delightful experience for them both#I'm vibrating out of my skin just thinking about it#can I promise I'll write it and put it out there? Hell no#can I still get excited by the prospect of it happening? Hell yes#sorry I'm rambling a little too much over here#I just haven't felt this good writing in MONTHS#thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it <3333
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you know what guys. after this whole thing goes down, i hope we get the ACTUAL kamiyama school festival and it is a very good comparison to the first one. where we can see clearly how much mizuki has grown since that first event in january 2021, since that first school festival in middle school.
and i hope mizuki gets to have fun with her friends and can hang out with ena. and i hope ena has fun too. i hope she gets to tease akito, forge bonds with her classmates at the fried squid stall, and hopefully get roped into a dumb show with the oddballs 1 2. i hope this is enaâs pandemonium. i hope we all can have a little bit of joy and whimsy while getting to see how much the gangâs lives have changed at this point.
and i hope rui is a little worried for mizuki â i sincerely hope he is somewhere in mizu5, quietly waiting by the rooftop like he always has for her. but by the end of the schoolfes event he can look at mizuki, her whole face bright as all eight students in our little kamikou main cast gang come down from the rooftop (for one last time maybe, but we donât talk about graduation in front of rui⊠unless ofc we bring it up this event) and he can say âyouâve come such a long way, havenât you, mizuki? iâm happy for you.â
#project sekai#karamell yells#mizuki akiyama#ena shinonome#rui kamishiro#mizu5#sorry for making this sort of about rui. will not happen again#I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT THE KAMIYAMA HIGH FESTIVAL EVENT#and i will elaborate on the graduation thing btw#@ lunchtime i came with this wholeee scenario#ruiâs a lil bit worried about mizuki after whatever happens in mizu5#and is all âoh boy i hope sheâs enjoying todayâ#and cough okay i stole this bit from honakana wedding BUT#tsukasaâs like âwell rui. you know what time it isâ#âits our last school festival rui. we need to make sure everyoneâs having fun!#tis the duty of us seniors HAHAHAHA ok so blah blah blahâ#and just ig. kidnaps ena for a little bit#phantom thief style. she is so confused but plays along#and mizuki and rui (and the other 2nd years) get to go around the school to look for them#over time rui kind of realises âhm. actually. mizuki is having so much fun right now⊠wow the power of companionship :)â#and ofc the final destination is that rooftop#and rui lets the 2nd years go in front of him and watches themâŠ. and is all âwow. i might never get to do this again.#iâm so glad we get to be connected like this :)â#blah blah. wholesome ending. blahâŠâŠâŠ..#what a ramble hey#but tis my duty as chairwoman of rui#a friend of his is a favourite of mine#cough SORRY AGAIN
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