#i hope there’s more of this to come because this is comedy gold

[dumbass-hyperfixations]

I was so disappointed that no one from the fire fam was commenting on/joking about Eddie’s moustache in the premiere episode of season 8, but I was just rewatching one of the clips (when they’re talking up on the roof about getting Gerrard fired) and I finally paid more attention when Chimney said this after Hen told told Buck they did get Gerrard fired but he came back:

“Like Michael Myers with a push-broom moustache. [looks over to Eddie] No offense, Magnum.”

and I finally realized that THIS is what he meant:

Howard “Chimney” Han, your impeccable sense of humour will always be famous to me❤️

[m0llygunn]

friends with b(aby)enefits (eddie munson x fem!reader)

MONTH ONE: Just friends—what a silly concept. After your accident, Eddie's been a full-fledged comedian, ill-conceived jokes left and right... neither of you are laughing though when his 'comedy routine' comes back to bite the both of you in the ass.

cw: 18+!, mature language, smut, pinv sex (unprotected again smh), pet names, vomiting, a lot of pregnancy related topics, potentially dramatized pregnancy symptoms (for the plot obvi, also idk anything about pregnancy), mention of readers period, mention of birth control an: lots of minor time jumps/cuts but we get some eddie pov!!! wc: 8.3k+

0 / 01 / 02 / 03 / 04 / 05 / 06 / 07 / 08 / 09 / 00

Arms wrapped around your waist from behind, both palms pressed flat to your belly.

“How are my girls doing today?”

Comically loud, heavily puckered kisses scattered over the top of your stomach, catching you by surprise— not at all expecting to be ambushed with facetious affection by your friend. 

Eddie thinks he’s a comedian. 

With about a month of his poor taste in jokes, he thinks he’s hilarious— and a self-proclaimed prophet because he 'just knows' that it's a baby girl. He's full of shit and you desperately try to not give him the benefit of finding his terrible jokes humorous. To your demise, from time to time, they get you.

His latest stunt was when he greeted you for your usual Friday get together. He swung the door open quick enough to stun you and immediately dropped to his knees. With a firm hold on your hips, he leaned in close to your belly, “Hi, baby girl. Did you miss daddy?” he cooed with big eyes and an even bigger smirk.

With a hand on his forehead, pushing him away, unfortunately you laughed, and unfortunately it feels like all of his jokes are coming back to bite the both of you in the ass. It’s hardly been 24 hours since the offending, but objectively funny joke, and neither of you are laughing now.

“Maybe you just ate something bad?” he offers with sheer, dumb, hope. “Or maybe it’s the flu?” he says, snapping his fingers together like he struck the gold mine of an idea.

Eddie can be as hopeful as he wants, but as you lower yourself down to the couch from vomiting your insides out in the bathroom, the panic in his eyes is evident.

“Maybe,” you reply dully, dropping your head to rest against the back of the couch. 

“Do you want to lay down? I can bring you to my bed?” he asks with concern lacing his words. 

“I’m—” you start, but with acid suddenly rising in your throat again, your eyes go wide and you jump from the couch with a renewed energy, just barely making it to the bathroom.

────────────

To put it plainly, you vomited two more times after. When you finally felt like you were done throwing up, with an empty stomach and a sore body, Eddie helped you to his bed and you slept off your spell of nausea. When you woke up a few hours later feeling a touch better, both of you decided the best choice would be to buy a pregnancy test. 

“Just to be safe, right?” he had said, eyes burning into you as you laid sprawled across his bed, feeling no longer nauseous, but instead like an empty shell of a person. “We should buy one, right?” he asked again, eyes growing wider in your silence. 

It felt like even moving your sight line to look at him took too much energy, but you met his gaze, and he nodded his head like he had made his own silent conclusion. 

“We’ll go after, okay?” he said, continuing his one-sided conversation. Standing from the edge of the bed he wiped his palms down the front of his thighs before straightening out and rubbing his hand down from his mouth to his chin. He nods a second time, doing what you assume is him coming to another silent conclusion. “I’ll get you crackers?” he continued, eyebrows raised. 

With your eyes locked on him, you swallowed the dryness in your mouth. You hadn’t done anything notable, hadn’t even attempted to answer him, but his face softened, mouth turning into a regretful frown. 

“Sorry you’re sick,” he said, bending down to pat your head, letting his thumb trace gently across your temple. It was a tender movement and you absorbed the warmth of his contact, letting your eyes blink shut. “I’ll get you water too, okay? Water and crackers and we’ll see how you feel after that.”

Eddie’s a lot of things, but nurturing and soft, and with high levels of compassion is not exactly how you would describe him. He can be those things, but principally, he’s more of an asshole— but one that you love enough to keep around, obviously. But an asshole, nonetheless. The last time you had the flu he laughed at you and made fun of the way you threw up, albeit, it was when you both were in your teens, but regardless, he was a dickhead about it— and most recently, when you had gotten a cold, he ceaseless made fun of your constant sneezing and the blazing red tone of your sore nose from blowing it so much, calling you Rudolf and asking how ‘Big Red’ was doing at this time of the year. Asshole.

Dichotomously to the Eddie you’ve known all these years, he grazes the backside of his knuckles across your cheek, rubbing them back and forth gently. It's painfully obvious he doesn’t do this often from the way his hand jerks, finger nearly poking you in the eye, but you appreciate the notion. You know you must really look awful if he’s managed to compose this much compassion for you. 

────────────

They say that nothing makes people more productive than the last minute. As the pharmacy's closing time approached, it was only then when either of you felt so inclined to even mention going to get the test.

After Eddie got you your water and crackers, you started feeling much better, and feeling much better meant it was easy to pretend like nothing had happened. You both unhealthily and aggressively ignored your potential futures by acting like it was any regular Saturday evening. You talked about your upcoming work week, and watched the usually shitty reruns on TV. Eddie made some freezer-burnt chicken nuggets, you warmed up some soup, and it was boring and uneventful, but it was the most comforting that boring and uneventful could be. 

The sun began to set and it was like the ticking of Wayne's alarm clock on the coffee table beside you only got louder and louder as time went on. 

“S’almost eight,” Eddie had eventually mumbled. You swallowed, keeping your eyes on the TV as you found this particular old rerun episode of Mama’s Family to be the most interesting thing in the world, which is odd considering you usually change the channel whenever it's on. 

With both of you sitting at the couch, feet kicked up, resting side by side on the coffee table, Eddie moves his foot far enough to just barely knock yours— an attempt to pull your attention away from the screen.

“The show’s almost done,” you say, turning your head towards him but keeping your eyes on the TV.

“The pharmacy closes at eight.”

“I feel fine,” you shrug.

Moving your feet from the tabletop, Eddie copies you, putting his feet down on the floor, but he goes a step further, sitting up from the couch. He stands, facing you, but you keep your eyes on the TV, ignoring him fivefold. He props his hand on his hip, arm bent at the elbow, one foot tap away from looking like someone's mother. You ignore him tenfold. 

“You want to stay here while I go?”

“Go where?”

“You’re fucking with me, aren’t you?” he laughs. You can hear the amusement in his voice. His hand drops from his hip and you look at him to see the smirk written across his face.

“Go where?” you double down. Huffing a laugh from his nose, he turns, opting to get himself ready, and begrudgingly, you do too. With your feet dragging through every step, you get in the car, and Eddie drives the two of you to the pharmacy. 

────────────

Under the bright, white fluorescent lights of aisle number eight, you and Eddie stare your potential future down. An unnerving amount of tests sit on the shelf at eye level, some with cute little daisy packaging, others looking sterile and pharmaceutical. 

“Why are there so many options?” Eddie asks, picking one up and flipping it to read the back. You look at the price tags and your mouth nearly drops to the floor. 

“Why are they so expensive?” you ask, taking the box out of his hand and putting it back on the shelf.

“Hey,” he objects, reaching out for it. “That one says response in twenty minutes.” 

“That one is, like, twice as much as that one,” you argue, pointing to another test.

“Yeah,” he says, grabbing the test from the shelf. “That one says a two hour response,” he continues, pointing at the exaggerated font on the front of the test in his hand, waving it in your face. “I’d rather be shitting my pants for twenty minutes than two hours.”

He’s acting normal, braggart and teasing, you can’t muster that same energy. Your stomach swirls and squeezes and does everything it shouldn’t do. Nerves or nausea, you’re not sure. A ceiling light flickers two aisles over and you can’t stand being here.

“Maybe…” you pause. Your hands start to turn clammy. “Maybe we shouldn’t get any,” you say, shifting in place. You turn to fully face Eddie, looking at him as he has a boxed test pulled close to his face, reading the side of it. “Maybe we should just go home.” 

Eddie turns to you, brows furrowed. “No— what? You just spent the whole day throwing up, we gotta get something,” he says, looking at you like you’re insane. The ceiling light flickers again and you definitely feel insane. 

It wasn’t the whole day, it was just the morning, you nearly object until you realize it doesn’t help your case. 

Bringing your hand to your mouth, you chew on the edge of your nail, distracting yourself from the tremble in your limbs. From left to right and back again, you flutter your sight over the different options. There’s too many. Too many and it’s overwhelming. 

“Hey,” Eddie says softly. The weight of his arm settles around your shoulder, pulling you so that your bicep meets the edge of his chest in a half hug. “Don’t be nervous,” he continues, in a low coo. You step inwards, turning the half hug into a full hug. Taking a deep breath, all you can muster is a short nod of your head. 

His arm moves from your shoulder, hand grazing down to your mid back. Focusing your attention on his touch, you take another deep breath, inhaling his familiar scent. Smoky, woodsy, and a contradicting sweetness from whatever shampoo that was probably the cheapest and on sale.

“We’ll be fine, remember? You probably just ate something bad.” he says. He rubs his hand up between your shoulder blades and back down. You want to believe him, you really do. 

“I’m scared,” you say quietly.

“Why?” he asks, voice just as small as yours. 

“It… it doesn’t feel like I ate something bad.” You swallow down the jagged edges of emotion that your voice gets stuck on. His hand, mid rub, pauses and you pull away enough to see him. His eyes glaze over with something you’re unsure of before he quickly blinks it back. 

“Well…” he swallows. “What does it feel like then?” he asks, brows turned upwards. He's nervous, you’re nervous, and the light flickers again, reminding you where you are. 

“Can we go home? Please.” Your nerves become far too jittery and it’s starting to turn into nausea again. Your stomach lurches and Eddie watches you for another moment, eyes searching yours until he nods, patting your back before pulling away.

“Yeah. I’ll just buy this one and we can go.” He takes your hand in his, twenty-minute-test in the other, and he guides you to the front of the store. 

────────────

“It’s almost nine now, so it’ll be ready at…”

“9:20,” you say when Eddie takes a concerning amount of time doing the math. The ride home was quiet. Being out of the fluorescence helped your nerves, and as you got further and further away from the pharmacy, and closer and closer to Eddie’s place, you started to feel normal again. 

“I knew that, I was just… thinking,” he responds. He sits up from where he was crouching in front of the dresser, using it as a table to put together the test. 

Decidedly, it was just nerves that had put you on edge, that’s it. The test is nothing but precautionary, just to rule out what could have made you sick. Eddie joins you, sitting on the edge of the bed. 

“Uh— before, we get a response,” he pauses, wringing his hands together. His eyes move down to his lap and your chest tightens. “I just want to say that whatever it is… I don’t regret what we did… and whatever it is, I’ll be there… for my girls.” 

He looks at you, his smirk widening by the second, and you can’t help the snort of laughter from escaping. Like every other ill-timed joke that he's pervasively told over the last month or so, he gets you, and you appreciate it this time as it lessens the gnawing feeling in your belly.

Despite the joke, when you really look at him, with his lips spread in a smile, his eyes swarm with the same trepidations that you feel. He’s a comedian but even the comedian is human. You try your hand at lightening the mood. 

“What if it’s not a girl?” you ask, playing along. He smiles, bumping his shoulder into yours as he huffs a breath from his nose. Shaking his head in an almost mirthful way you think you were successful until his demeanour drops into something serious. 

“What did you mean earlier?” he asks “When you said that it doesn’t feel like you ate something bad?”

“I just— I don't know. I just, I thought I had a feeling,” you explain. Eddie hums, eyes now set forward on the test. “I think I was just nervous, that’s all.” 

Twenty minutes has never felt longer. Eddie accepts your answer at face value but doesn’t do much to show it. He doesn't do much in general, and neither do you. At the ten minute mark, his hand found your knee. At the fifteen minute mark you were curled under his arm, resting your head on his chest as he rubbed up and down your arm. In the last minute, you had taken his hand in yours, playing with his fingers as you watched the seconds tick by on his Casio watch. 

21:19:59 turned to 21:20:00, and you turned to Eddie. Synchronously and in silence, you parted from each other. He stood and you sat. He moved to the dresser, and you held your breath. 

With his back facing you, you watch with unblinking eyes as he reaches for the instructions. Humming to himself, your lungs ache. You try to parse the meaning behind his tone, or vibration, or pitch — or anything that could give way to what he's seeing, but it’s far too vague. Taking a deep and vital breath, filling your choking lungs, you're just about to ask, mouth already open when he speaks.

“It says negative.”

“It says negative?” you parrot in disbelief.

“Negative.” Eddie firmly answers.

There’s no way. You should feel a weight lift from you, but, evident avoidance aside, that feeling is still there, stronger if anything.

“I…” you start, interrupting the loud beat of silence. “I’m not saying I want to be pregnant… but I think it’s wrong, Eddie.”

“Wrong? How could it be wrong?” he says, turning around to look at you. 

“I don’t know,” you shrug. “Aren’t they, like, only guaranteed to work like 95% of the time?”

“That’s still a lot of the time,” he says, copying your shrug.

“Yeah… but—” you shake your head, stopping yourself. This is what you wanted right? Why would you fight against the answer that you mostly hoped for? That you were already certain about in the car barely an hour ago. “Whatever. It’s probably right. I think… I think I’m just… tired.”

Eddie nods, agreeing with you. He turns enough to set the test down, abandoning cleanup for another time— gross, but when he asks you if you’re going to sleep over, you willingly ignore the unsanitary act of leaving a used pregnancy test to sit and simmer bacteria growth. 

“You gonna sleep here?”

“Can I?’

“Of course,” he laughs.

────────────

If it were a peaceful morning, you would have woken up to the warm, red tinted sun coming into Eddie’s room through the maroon coloured bed-sheet-turned-blinds. 

If it were a peaceful morning you would have woken up to shared warmth, his arm just barely tossed over your hip, hand resting in the dip of your waist. 

If it were a peaceful morning you would have been able to bask in the meaning of having him beside you— what it meant beyond just shared warmth, what it meant beyond friendship. 

If it were a peaceful morning, oh, if it were a peaceful morning…

If it were a peaceful morning, you wouldn’t have woken up to rising bile in your throat and your heart hammering in your chest. It's not a peaceful morning, it's a race against time. With your hand cupped to your mouth, ripping yourself from the shared tangled sheets, tripping your way to the bathroom over the crap on the floor, time almost wins. 

You made it by a stroke of luck with not a second to spare.

────────────

“It must be the flu,” you had croaked weakly. Eddie nodded, looking at you with tired eyes that had been startled awake by your fumbling and awful retching.

“Yeah, it’s definitely the flu.” It was not a whole hearted agreement, but there was no way any bad food would still be in your system. And with a negative pregnancy test, the flu is the only answer. Obviously.  

The next day, in the quietness of your apartment, you kept a preemptive bowl next to your bed, just in case.

Thank god you did because it was the worst it’s been yet, and with your temperamental luck, you would not have made it to the bathroom this time.

────────────

“Hello?” Eddie answered from the other end of the telephone line. 

Your untouched breakfast sits on the table as you stand in front of your wall-hanging phone, leaning against the counter to stop yourself from keeling over entirely. 

“It's me.” 

“Oh, hey, didn’t think I’d hear from you so early, what's up?” His near chipper attitude is grating and if you could strangle someone through the phone you might have muscled up the last of your strength and considered it. 

“I’m still sick.” If you sound as awful as you feel, and equally as annoyed, it's because you are every terrible emotion in the dictionary. You are the essence of a bad mood, a side effect of how sick you’ve been.

“Shit—” he cursed. “I have work in thirty but I can stop by after?”

“Yeah, you already told me you were working,” you snark, because obviously he has work. It’s Monday.

“Do you want me to stop by after?

“I'm just telling you that I’m still sick.”

The call lulls and you can hear a slight rustle from the other end.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“Why are you sorry?”

“Because you’re sick and I feel bad,” he says, voice turning up like he's asking you if that is an alright answer. It’s not, and you twirl the phone cord between your fingers, distracting yourself from scoffing and saying something you know you’ll regret. 

The call lulls for another moment and he clears his throat, coughing right into the receiver. 

“Uh— aside from being sick… everything else okay?” he asks tentatively, pausing too frequently that it annoys you, even more so than you already are.

“I’m fine, I just feel like garbage.”

“Nothing else bothering you? I have a minute, we can talk?”

“I said I’m fine.”

“You’re— and don’t bite my head off— but you’re not on your period?”

“Why would you ask that?” You meet his stupidity with a harsh and rightfully deserved defensiveness. “Don’t you think I would tell you if I was? You know, all things considered.” 

His voice raises as he comes to his own defence. “Well, I just thought… 'cause you thought that maybe there was a chance that the test was wrong, but then we agreed it wasn’t and…”

“And?”

“And you’re in a bad mood.”

You hang up the phone and when it rings again, you let it. 

────────────

Eddie spent the whole day being eaten alive by his thoughts. You said you had a feeling, and Eddie knows you well enough to know you wouldn’t joke around about stuff like this. He would, he has, but you wouldn't.

Since the moment you told him that you weren’t on birth control, he had been thinking about it. Hypothetically, having a kid with you wouldn’t be the worst. He’d actually… like it… maybe? Would he say that to you? No, but it's not an awful thought.

Sure he made jokes out of it, but that was just his ill mannered way of accepting the fact that he kind of, maybe, potentially, would like having a kid with you… and being more than just friends. But he could never tell you that, so he made stupid, stupid jokes. 

But now that having a baby with you is less hypothetical, he’s fucking scared. Not because it’s with you, but because he might be having a fucking baby. That’s terrifying in and of itself. 

When you first started feeling sick, he let himself really believe for about an hour that maybe you had eaten something bad, but in his heart of hearts, he knew. There was no way. Four weeks and 3 days after he came inside you�� not that he's keeping track of the days— and you’re suddenly experiencing ‘food poisoning’, even though you didn’t eat anything particularly abnormal or poison-like?

You’re pregnant. So fucking pregnant. There’s no way you’re not. 

“Hey, Bill. You have kids, right?” Eddie had asked as he sat down at the break table with one of his more favourable colleagues. 

Bill, more or less his mentor— or more eloquently put, the kind soul that's been helping him work his way up to being an actual mechanic and not just the guy who cleans and sweeps up after them like he’s been doing for the last year and a bit. He’s an older gentleman, doesn’t do much small talk, is in a permanent old man bad attitude, but he’s a good guy— reminds him of Wayne at times. Eddie trusts him enough, especially not to go talking about him around town. 

“Uh-huh. Grandkids too,” he answers, barely looking up from his newspaper. Eddie knew this of course, but he couldn't think of any other way to approach the topic. 

“Right, sorry,” Eddie apologizes, wringing his hands out of nervousness and dragging out the point of interrupting Bill’s lunch break.  

“You gonna be a father?” Bill asks bluntly.

Father? Eddie's familiar with a particular ‘F’ word, uses it way too fucking much in fact. Father, on the other hand, is an ‘f’ word that was barely in his vocabulary, he could go weeks without letting that word pass through his thoughts, let alone it being a descriptor of his very own character. 

Eddie’s eyes widen, mouth dropping open as his breath stutters like a kid getting caught red handed. “No.” he stumbles to answer. “Uh— maybe. I don’t know. We don’t know.”

“So what are you askin’?”

“Your girlfriend— uh, wife—”

“Wife,” Bill answers with an annoyed ring to it. 

“Right, your wife… What was she like when she got pregnant?” 

Bill shakes his head, ignoring the question. “Did she take a test? They have those now. Can buy ‘em at the store,” he gruffs.

“We did, but it was negative. She… she said they’re wrong sometimes though, and she thought that… she thought that maybe it was wrong?”

Bill sets down his newspaper, the edges of both his fists meeting the surface of the table top. He looks to Eddie, catching his flighty eye contact, giving him his full attention.

“Morning sickness?”

“She’s been sick the last couple of days.”

“Hormonal?”

“Hormonal?” Eddie asks, quirking a brow. Bill rolls his eyes, not unlike how Wayne has done time after time.

“Bad mood? Mood swings?”

“Kind of?”

“I won’t go into detail because I respect my wife,” Bill says, eyeing Eddie through slanted eyes. “Any changes that aren’t to do with her mood?” he asks, looking down the slope of his nose.

“Huh?” Eddie thinks hard, trying to decipher what Bill means. Bill gives Eddie an encouraging nod that quickly turns short-tempered.

“Her body? Any changes?” Bill grumps.

“Oh.” Eddie’s eyes go wide. “Uh— I don't know. She’s not really my girlfriend, we’re just friends.” 

“Just a friend you got pregnant?” Bill’s near-permanent-scowl breaks into a smile, lips turning at the corners in a sadistic way, eyes gleaming with taunting amusement. Eddie feels his palms start to sweat. 

“So you think she’s pregnant?”

“I think you’re up shits creek with a turd for a paddle, kid. Gettin’ a friend pregnant,” he scoffs, shaking his head as he laughs to himself. He fixes his newspaper back upright, picking up where he left off in the classifieds. 

“Well, we’re good friends. I— she… we—” Eddie thinks about telling him that it’s you— Bill knows of you. Eddie’s talked about you enough, but he bites his tongue for the same reason that he didn’t go to Wayne about this— it would be all, ‘just ask her out’, ‘quit pussyfootin’ ‘round it,’ but he doesn’t get it, he can’t just ask you out. He—

“You like her more than a friend.” Bill says, making Eddie freeze. He opens his mouth to speak, to deny, to confirm, to anything, but nothing comes out. “Oh you got it bad, huh?” Bill continues with a teasing smile.

“C’mon, it’s not—” Eddie tries to object but Bill sees right through it. 

“You love her?”

“I…” Eddie swallows, thinking over his answer. “I don’t know…maybe?”

“Well, you got an interesting journey ahead of yous if she really is pregnant,” he laughs again.

And with that entirely unhelpful conversation, Eddie spent the rest of the day not only ruminating on you being pregnant, but now, his feelings for you as well. 

────────────

After work he went straight home, showered, got redressed in sweats and the cleanest shirt he could find and beelined straight for your apartment. He made one quick stop at the pharmacy but quicker than even he anticipated, he was at your front door. 

He knocked, and then there you were, opening the door for him, not exactly smiling— but not looking angry either, or sick, which is a good start.

Greeting him with a quiet ‘hello’, you opened the door wider. He stepped into your apartment, and like he mentally rehearsed, he leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. Before he could look at your reaction, he turned, hiding his face behind the curtain of his still damp hair, and kicked his shoes off. 

He’s just trying to get back on your good side. After this morning— your bad mood, and then him only making it worse by asking if you were on your period, which he knew you weren’t because you said that it's been weird since you stopped birth control but… yeah, he’s just trying to get on your good side, definitely not anything more than that. 

Clearing his throat and praying his cheeks aren’t as flushed as they feel, he tries to move on. “How’re you doing?” he asks. You spare him, and you don’t mention the kiss nor give him any weird reactions— which is good, right? You would tell him off if you didn’t want him to kiss you, right?

“I’m doing fine now,” you reply, turning to lead him to the kitchen. He follows behind, humming an acknowledgement. At your counter is a full, waiting dish that looks like and smells like spaghetti. You sit back in your seat, and he takes the one next to it, putting his brown shopping bag down in front of him. 

He watches you as you bring a forkful of your dinner to your mouth. “You’re eating, you must not be feeling sick anymore?”

“No, I stopped feeling sick around lunch and then I was starving,” you say through a second mouthful, swirling your third bite around the fork. 

“Nice,” he nods. Eddie’s not sure of much, not now, hardly ever, but you feeling better around lunch means you only felt sick in the morning, and you being sick in the mornings falls exactly under the conditions of morning sickness… and that means…

Swallowing down his thoughts in a thick gulp, he reaches for the pharmacy bag. “Well, I bought another test just in case,” he rushes out quickly, moving to take out the good part of his shopping haul to lessen the blow if the test somehow pisses you off. “—and I also bought you—”

“Liquorice! Oh my god and popcorn,” you say excitedly, interrupting him with the loud crinkles of you grabbing for the package of candy, quickly ripping it open. 

Eddie watches you closely, the way your eyes light up for some of your favourite foods. He was taking a risk, buying you snacks when he knew that you’ve been sick but it was that or flowers and flowers seemed a little too… forward?

Your reaction to the snacks though, it’s not abnormal, but it’s not exactly normal either… a bit too… ravenous? To be fair, you were sick and now you’re feeling better, maybe you are just extra hungry…. But then again, there's also your bad mood earlier and sure you felt like shit from being sick, but you were usually pretty happy whenever you talked to him. He wasn’t used to all of these… mood swings.

Symptom after symptom, his thoughts finally bubble out. “I think you should take the test again,” he says, interrupting you as you rip open the bag of popcorn. You pause and he holds his breath.

With a shrug, you resume your movements, reaching into the bag and grabbing a handful. “But I feel fine?” you say, waving Eddie off.

“I think… maybe just in case?”

“Here, sit down, I’ll get you some spaghetti,” you ignore him, standing from your seat. “It’s so good, I swear. This is my second plate full.” You grab a dish from the cupboard, serving some up from a pot on the stove top without waiting for a reply from Eddie— not that he had one, he was too stunned by your unconcerned mood to think of one. 

Adding a slice of garlic bread to the side of the dish, you place it down in front of him, quickly moving back to your own seat to dig into the popcorn and finish your own meal. 

“You didn’t go to work today?” he asks after mumbling a polite thank you.

“No, I called in. When I got the promo, I got like six extra sick days, plus vacation time, so I figured I might as well use them,” you shrug indifferently.

“Yeah,” Eddie nods, taking a quick glance at you before looking back to his plate of food, moving his fork around the plate absentmindedly. “Do you happen to have… better insurance with your job now?” he asks, attempting to match your aloofness.

You pause your fork before shoving it in your mouth, opting to turn to look at Eddie. He purposely avoids your eye contact, continuing to swirl his fork in his food.

“Why?”

“Just curious,” he shrugs. “Whenever I get my promo—” he pauses. “—if I get the promo, Coop gives out some shitty insurance plan. Was just wondering what you were getting these days,” he continues nervously.

“I have insurance.”

“Good.”

“Why’s it good?” you ask, squinting your eyes at him.

“Is it not good? You get sick, you don’t have to pay as much— I think that’s objectively good.”

“Fine,” you relent. You stare at him for another moment, but when you finally go back to your food, Eddie lets out a long breath that he was holding in before going back to his food.

He finishes his plate while lost in a daze of thoughts. There’s no way you weren’t pregnant. Absolutely no way. He doesn’t know much about pregnancy, that’s for sure, but this is checking off every single box in his very limited knowledge of symptoms. 

He only withdrew from his head when he felt you staring at him yet again. You had pushed your plate back on the counter, head resting in the palms of your hands as you watched him intently with a particular glint of something in your eyes, something that he’s only seen two other times.

“Hi?” he says shyly, cheeks tingeing pink. 

“You kissed me on the cheek when you came in,” you state.

“Yeah, I did,” he nods, cheeks deepening to crimson under your close watch. 

“Do you want to stay the night?” you ask, stretching your leg out under the counter, running your foot along his shin.

Eddie chokes on his food before looking at you with wide eyes. Elbow bent to cover his mouth as he clears his throat from his sputtering, his eyebrows raise high, hiding under his bangs as he works through your suggestion. 

“Like stay the night or just stay the night?” he asks, eyes burning into you out of shock. 

“I just kept thinking about before… and, you know…” you say, shrugging, hooking your foot around his calf.

“So like, stay the night?” he asks, eyes glimpsing down at your outstretched leg. 

With a sly smile, you nod your head making Eddie’s eyes grow even wider.

“Are you sure?” 

“I’m really sure.” 

Eddie takes a final bite of his food before pushing back in his chair. You excitedly stand, taking Eddie’s hand and leading him to your room. 

Maybe it’s a stupid thing to do when you’re both still up in arms about being pregnant, but Eddie would be a fool to say no to you. He physically couldn’t, has never had it in him. It doesn’t help that he really likes you and might potentially love you. And after all, he’s just a simple man. 

────────────

“Harder.” 

Your desirous voice echoing off of wallpapered bedroom walls, airy moans embellishing every thrust, Eddie does his best to give you what you want. Round two and countless of your orgasms later, you’re still begging Eddie to keep going.

Round one was fantastic. Sincerely earth shattering and left him winded and full heartedly wishing he took up track in his freshman year instead of smoking cigarettes. 

The night started with you riding him, insisting that he laid back, and who was he to say no to that? He watched you intently, grasping at your hips with each rise and fall, feeling the way your body nearly trembled over his own as you made yourself feel better and better. He was completely enamoured by the way your mouth rounded into a perfect oval, the way your eyes welled as you rose up and down, enjoying yourself truly and utterly. Then, when he took over, you were begging, whimpering, and moaning for him. He swore he had never came that hard in his life. 

With the long day of worrying and his stress induced sleepless nights wearing on him, he was nearly nodding off when you were on him for round two. It was exciting— you needing him like this, and his cock was kicking up again before he could process it. 

You came again, adding another tally to the growing tab of how many times you’ve come tonight. This time, you were on your hands and knees, back in a deep arch as he watched the recoil of your ass with each of his thrusts. 

The only thing on his mind was you. How you felt so perfect around his cock, how pretty you sounded whining and begging for him to keep going, how beautiful you are, and how badly he just wanted to keep making you feel good, but then it was like a switch flipped in his head. 

He heard it once, how pregnant women would sometimes get really horny. Insatiably horny— and you just kept asking for more, begging for him to keep going. You were cumming and still managing to ask him to keep going. He had never had sex like this before.

His skin that had grown damp throughout the night, covered in a permanent sheen of sweat, now drew dry, just like his mouth. His thighs burned, his calves begged for a break, his balls were aching from staving off his own release, and now there was very little uncertainty in his mind that you weren’t pregnant. 

Mid thrust, you clench around him, stealing his already stolen breath, pulling from his meandering thoughts. He refocuses his gaze on the bounce and jiggle of your ass and the sweet noises singing from your lips before letting his palms slide down the slope of your arched back, giving himself better leverage to keep going. 

There's no doubt in his mind that he can finish this round. Not only would he feel like an asshole if he tapped out now, but he would also feel like the biggest idiot because this has been it for him. This is the orbiting thought in his mind, the exact scenario that he conjures up in his imagination during his alone time. 

Swallowing thickly and taking an open mouth breath, he moves a hand from your back to wrap around your torso, finding your clit with his finger tips. “One more. Gonna give you one more, pretty girl,” he rasps, voice horse and ragged from his near panting. Your back arches even deeper, hips pressing back into his as you let out a wavered moan. 

“Feels so good, Eddie. Love your cock, feels so good,” you cry, taking heavy, moaning breaths between words, your voice staggering with each of his thrusts that push you further up into the mattress. 

“Mhm, know you love it, baby. Sucking me right in, n' so wet for me," Eddie says through exasperated breaths, words coming out babbled from his focus on not cumming as your walls squeeze him harder and harder.

“Want you to cum inside me again,” you whimper out. Eddie doesn’t answer, he just thrusts harder, rolling his hips against your backside, making you moan louder and giving you the last of every ounce of energy he has left in him.

When he feels your pussy start to flutter, tensing, and pulsating around him again, he knows you're close.

“Gonna cum for me, baby?” he breathes, voice only getting lower and more ragged from the absolute marathon of a night.

“Gonna cum, Eddie.” Your voice rises so high in volume that Eddie's certain your neighbours can hear. 

“Cum for me baby, wanna feel you squeeze my cock one last time tonight,” he grunts, starting to feel delusional with the way his head spins. He grips his free hand on your hip, pressing his fingers into your skin and grounding himself to you, trying to push away some of the daze to think clearly. 

Eddie feels your tightness pulling him in almost immediately. He holds off his own release for as long as he can, bringing you through your orgasm until he can’t take it anymore. He pulls out just in time for his own release, sending his cum spurting over your lower back as his chest practically explodes, burning lungs having all the air expelled from them in a wheeze as he stutters through his orgasm. 

After taking a few, long moments to catch his breath, he reaches for the same towel he used earlier, wiping you clean before falling to your side feeling absolutely exhausted.

“Wanted you to cum inside,” you say pitifully, cuddling closer to him.

“Can’t, you're not on birth control, we didn’t have a condom.”

“You did it before,” you pout. 

“Yeah.” Eddie says, exhaling deeply. 

Yeah and now he's 99.9% sure you’re pregnant. 

“It’s late, got work tomorrow,” Eddie says, eyes unwillingly fluttering closed as you push your way closer to him, pressing your bare chest to his, speckling gentle kisses along his neck.

“Are you sure?” you ask, pressing another kiss to his skin. He barely has the energy to respond and you deflate against him with a sigh.

“Baby,” he coos, frowning when he looks at your lower lip jetting out in a pout. As much as he’d love to keep going, he physically could not go for another round. His cock might let him despite it feeling nearly raw from all the friction, but his aching body definitely would not. “Let me just hold you, okay? We can cuddle,” he offers to try to fix your frown. It only works the slightest bit, relaxing the crinkle in between your brows.

He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you into his hold. You let out a quiet whine at first, clearly upset, but you eventually relax into him, melding to his side. It’s not long before Eddie’s out cold, completely wiped clean of energy. 

────────────

You woke up, ripping yourself from Eddie’s grasp, hand over your mouth, rushing for the bathroom again. Eddie follows behind you, barely alert, but at your side, rubbing your back.

When you were certain everything inside your stomach was gone, you sat back, leaning against the edge of the tub.

“Think I should take that test.” 

“Yeah, I think so too.” 

────────────

With the anticipation of waiting another painstaking twenty minutes, you sit on the ledge of the tub in your bathroom, watching Eddie’s back as he tinkers with the test again. The tailbone pain from sitting on the ceramic edge is nothing compared to the swirling nausea growing from your nervousness.

He had sat with you for a few minutes like the last time, but got up halfway through to get you water. He dallyed in the kitchen for a few minutes, and it was far too casual for you, especially too casual for the dramatic dungeon master himself. It was almost unnerving. 

At the fifteen minute mark, he sat with you again, throwing an arm around your shoulder, and you couldn't help but nuzzle into him. If his casualness was him disguised his nervousness, he doesn’t let on. 

This time, at the twenty minute mark, his watch beeped the grating default Casio alarm, and with the chime of a button being pressed, he stands, turning his back to you as faces the vanity. You don’t follow him, you couldn’t at this point, you feel welded to the tub ledge. 

Unlike last time, he doesn’t look at the instructions. He doesn’t hum. He doesn’t make any noise, he just turns to you, his body blocking the test. You feel your heart rate pick up, but he doesn’t give anything away with facial expressions or body language. 

His mouth opens, he takes a breath, you hold yours once again. 

“Well…” he starts. “You were right.” His tone is flat and you blink, trying to clear your confusion.

“I was right?” 

“Yeah.” he shrugs. “About the last test being wrong.”

“No.” 

“Yup,” he affirms, putting a plosive pop at the end of the word. Too casual.

With your heart pounding in your chest, thumping miles in minutes, you couldn’t process this even if you wanted to, so you don’t. You deny it. 

“You’re lying,” you state, ending your words with a light huff of laughter. Surely, this is all a joke. Eddie’s a comedian, right? Ill-conceived jokes left and right over the last month, this has to be one of them.

He doesn’t smile. His eyes don’t light up. He doesn’t laugh. “Come look,” he says, beckoning you over with a tilt of his head. 

You sit up from the ledge of the tub, moving to stand next to Eddie at the counter. He pulls out the instructions, pointing to a diagram.

“If the liquid turns blue, that means pregnant."

You look at the test, not bothering to look where Eddie points. Blue liquid sits where any other colour should be.

“It’s blue,” you state.

“Pregnant.” 

Pregnant.

The moment is eerily still. In the movies this is where the happy couples jump with excitement. In TV shows, they call family and let them know their good news. In commercials, they celebrate. They hug, they smile, they cry happy tears together. 

Eddie’s your best friend, but you’re not a couple, this wasn’t planned. So you both stand in silence, staring at the positive test.

“What do we do?” you ask, swallowing the lump in your throat.

“We could go get something to eat? I can call out and we can rent a movie or something?”

“Something to eat?” you laugh. It’s positive and he’s thinking about eating?

“Yeah, you should try to eat something,” he shrugs, turning to look at you. 

“Eddie. I’m—” Pregnant, you go to say but the word dies on your tongue. “Why are you not freaking out?” you say, staring at him with wide eyes trying to understand how he’s not affected at all by this. You’ve known Eddie a long time and he’s not exactly the calm and collected type. 

“Well…” he shrugs. “When you said that you thought the first one was wrong, I trusted you more than the test. Believe me, I’ve been freaking out, but now… it’s, kind of, settled in already, I guess.”

“Settled in?” you say, jaw dropping in shock. It’s your body, you were mostly certain you were pregnant— in denial at times, yes, but you knew, yet having it confirmed is still shell-shocking. How has it already ‘settled in’ for him?

“Yeah,” he shrugs. “If you want to keep it, I’m happy. If not, I’ll support you.”

“Happy?” you say, bewildered. 

“Well… yeah. We’ve... we've been friends forever. A kid that’s part you and part me? That’s fucking awesome, how could I not be happy, y’know?” he says, moving backwards to sit on the ledge of the tub. He leans forward with his hands on his knees, watching you with eyes that are too calm. Too, too, too calm about this. 

In your quiet mental chaos, you take a final look at the blue liquid before moving to sit next to him. Your skin prickles with cold shivers but you feel hot all over, like there's a flame of nerves in your belly and a hot air balloon in your chest making each breath feel laboured. 

“I’m…” you stumble over your words. “I— pregnancy is so— Eddie,” you breathe out. Your eyes inevitably start to water.  

“Pregnancy is so Eddie?” he laughs before turning towards you, noticing your eyes turning glossy. His face drops immediately, features turning soft as his brows turning up in concern. “Hey,” he hushes. “It’s okay. We’ll be fine, remember? Everything will be fine,” he assures you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder again, bringing you closer to him in a hug. 

“I know, I just—” you force a breath in your lungs. “I don’t know why I’m crying.”

“You can cry, it's okay,” he says quietly, and unfortunately, each of his nearly-whistled, whispered consonants pulls out a wave of fresh tears from you. His hand rubs over your shoulder and your cheeks only grow damper. “It’s okay to cry,” he repeats and you press your face to the cotton of his shirt. He pulls you in tighter, rubbing your back in long, steady strokes. 

Eddie’s seen you cry more than a handful of times— more than several handfuls of times, but this is substantial— it just feels different. Different because you’re pregnant. You’re going to have a baby. A baby with Eddie. Your best friend Eddie. Eddie, who you’ve had sex with three times. Eddie, who you’ve known forever, who you’ve spent day after day with, as a friend. Friends. You’re pregnant. Holy shit. 

Your mind races and you divert your thoughts before you stray down that road. “It’s gonna be half you and half me,” you say, mostly to yourself, repeating his earlier sentiment. 

“Half you, half me,” he echoes. He presses a kiss to the top of your head and yeah, this is different— different because Eddie doesn’t kiss you on the top of your head. He doesn’t give you kisses on the cheek either. Eddie’s given you noogies, he’s butted foreheads with you, even flicked you on numerous occasions, all particularly during your shared middle school years, but kisses? Kisses are unheard off. What you guys have been doing lately is unheard of. 

“We had sex and now we’re having a baby,” you state plainly, trying to bring any coherency to the situation, desperately needed to hear the unheard of.

“We did and now we are,” Eddie laughs. 

“You came inside me and now there’s a baby in there,” you continue, hearing every syllable of your own voice.

“That’s—” Eddie laughs quietly again. “Yeah, that’s how it works.” 

“I had morning sickness.”

“Yes you did. And mood swings.”

Pause.

“No I didn’t!” you gasp, pulling back from Eddie to look at him with a scowl. 

“You kind of did,” he smiles, dimples set deep in his grin.

“No, I didn’t.”

“You were also insatiably horny. I was getting leg cramps all night because of you,” he says, bopping your nose, making you scrunch it. Asshole.

“I was not ‘insatiably horny,” you scoff, rolling your eyes.

“Well… if it’s any consolation, if you wanted to have sex again, I could cum in you now, ‘cause you can’t get any more pregnant than you already are,” Eddie says matter-of-factly, purposefully batting his lashes, playing up a faux coyness just to get a rise out of you. Such an asshole.

You respond by hitting him in the stomach, followed by pushing him until he almost falls into the tub, grabbing onto the shower curtain to stop himself. 

“Hey— hey, you were the one asking for it!” he defends, corners of his lips turned up in an untimely smirk. 

“I’m never having sex again,” you shriek, burying your face in your hands. 

“Well, let’s not make drastic choices right now,” he says amusedly, bringing you back in for a hug.

“I’m serious. Never again. Not with you, not with anybody. Ever.” 

“Let’s just get some fresh air, maybe we’ll start thinking straight about this,” he laughs, pulling you to stand up and guiding you out of the bathroom.

Pregnant.

tags: @princesatracionera @venuslayla23-blog @mastermindmiko @tlclick73 @yujyujj @josephquinnsfreckles @uselessnewt @animechick555 @prestinalove @sluggzillaa @daisyridleyss (if you want to be tagged for the next part I kindly ask that you please reblog!)

thank you for reading! <3

[xkotaro16w]

—𝙻𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚊 𝙺𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚊𝚛 𝙷𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚃𝚠𝚒𝚗 𝚘𝚛 𝚊 𝙲𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝙳𝚞𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚊𝚗 𝙰𝚌𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚒𝚗 𝙰𝚕𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚖𝚢 𝙲𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚜—

Summary: Scenario/short scenario where Leona has a twin or a clone of him due to an accident in his alchemy class.

Pairing: Leona Kingscholar x GN!S/O.

CW: Fluff, swearing, slight comedy (?), grammatical error, OOC.

A/N: NOT ME RLY MAKING THIS AS A SCENARIO MABEFAKJFGBWKJB I HOPE U LIKE IT EHE (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ Do u know Aomine Daiki (THE ONLY 1 WHO CAN BEAT ME IS ME-)

What a miracle, Leona went to his class! Thanks to you who blackmailed him (sweetly), so he can attend the class. Now that you remember it again, alchemy class in here is like a whole circus!

Yes, a whole circus! Remember that day when Grim almost set the class on fire? Or perhaps the ADeuce almost blown off the class (or they did it once)? Perhaps in a worse case is Rook’s experiments. It is hilarious, dangerous, but also fun at the same time! This time is more hilarious. Another accident happened in alchemy class, more correctly Leona’s class. The victim? Leona himself. The perpetrator? Let us search who is it later. The smoke starts to surround the room, the students are running out from the class and coughing.

Oh no, the lion beastman will tear whoever that person is who did this to him. Rook calls out at his name and searches for him. This class will get a long lecture from Crewel later after he helps Leona.

“Roi du Leon! Are you alright?”

Rook grabs his shoulder and Leona’s nostril feels like it is dead because of the poison’s scent. They thought they are the only students left inside the class, not until another familiar voice comes out from the smoke.

“What the fuck? Ugh, this is why I do not wanna attend these stupid classes…”

Wait, what? The hunter’s face looks very surprised and stares back at Leona. No, he did not say anything. Then, who? The mysterious person comes out from the smoke and stares both at Leona and Rook with surprise.

Oh, this is hilarious.

Before Leona could open his mouth, Crewel’s voice rings to their ears. As soon as the smoke becomes thinner, people still only can see half of their bodies. Even Crewel could not believe what he sees! Leona Kingscholar is TWO, NOT ONE! Twins? Clone? What? How? Even Leona himself does not understand what just happened! The teacher sighs and tells them to get out from the class first. The students stare at the twins! Clone? Twin? One Leona is more than enough, BUT TWO? Oh, dear Great Seven, please spare the students’ life. They are not going to make it with two Leonas. One is… A threat to their lives already.

“Who the fuck are you?”

“No, who the fuck are you, huh?”

“Stop imitating me, bastard!”

This scene is very hilarious! Leona vs. Leona himself. Gosh, Rook almost laughs at the scene! Who would not laugh in here? Leona cursing to himself! Gold moment, everyone. Crewel comes out from the class and explains the potion that got Leona. Of course, as a teacher of alchemy, he MUST bring his student back to their normal form. Crewel tells Leona to wait while he makes the potion to cure him.

The twins grunt and mumble about classes are stupid and waste their nap times. When they head to the Botanical Garden, they can hear Ruggie’s surprise’s voice. One Leona is enough to make the hyena suffers, AND NOW TWO? Good luck, Ruggie. Ruggie drops the bag accidentally from his hand. What is this? What? Two Leonas? Which one is the real one? Is this the end of Ruggie’s life? The left Leona growls and gives a short explanation about what happened. Now that makes Ruggie laughs. Come on, it is RARE for him to be a victim in the alchemy class, right? Unless someone is very desperate to die in his hand.

After a few minutes of them chattering, you come to the Botanical Garden. It is time to visit your lazy boyfriend! As you open the Botanical Garden’s door, two lions look towards you. Wait, why are there two Leonas? Who is this? Leona’s secret twin? Or perhaps someone is cosplaying as Leona? Is he Farena who disguise himself as Leona so he could watch over Leona?

The lion sighs and explains ONCE MORE just for you, their beloved herbivore. Can you handle two Leonas at the same time, herbivore? You will learn from now on, good luck for you too! Ruggie excuses himself and whispers good luck to you. This is going to be difficult and it is going to be a very long day. When you want to sit down, the right Leona pulls you to his lap and causes you to sit on his lap.

“C’mere, herbivore…”

“Hey! Don’t just snatch away MY herbivore!”

“YOURS? Who the fuck- “

“Stop it, Leona… S?”

They look at you with a sharp gaze. Alright, this is VERY difficult. They keep fighting whose herbivore are you! His or his, left or right, Leona or Leona, etc. Even during the whole lunch time, these lions cannot shut up.

“Ok, enough…”

As his, no, THEIR S/O, you try to make them shut up and stop the fighting. As you sigh and look at the two of them, you try to advise them that you are their significant other because both are the same person. Right?  When the nap time comes again, you feel like you are trapped in between two clingy lions. You cannot and will not be able to get away from Leona(s). You are lying down in the middle of two huge lion beastmen and you expect yourself to escape from there? How fool of you, S/O.

Even when Leona has a magift practice, you should have seen Jack and Epel reactions seeing two Leonas are going to play and practice magift. Is this what you call your biggest rival is yourself? 

“Le-Leona senpai?! Wh-who is this beside you?!” Jack points at the other Leona, who cares which one is real at this point.

“Leona-san?! Why there are two of you?!” Epel says right after Jack spoke.

The lion beastman only growls in frustration, does he need to explain it again and again? Yet for this time he only says it was an accident in alchemy class by a bastard student he is still searching their head, which makes them wonder who has the audacity to do this to the Leona Kingscholar.

When you watch the practice itself, you can see everyone is looking at you to help them escape this hell immediately. Why is that damn Crewel taking too much time to make the cure? Cannot he see that the whole academy is suffering with two Leonas (except Rook who enjoys it and thinks of it as a part of… Amusement to his own needs). Ruggie suggests to put one Leona in a team, and put the other to the other team, so it will balance each team (who wants to play magift with two Leonas in one team anyway?). Leona sighs, thinking that it does not sound bad either. Unfortunately, today’s practice does feel like hell itself. Each time is very exhausted dealing with Leona. Surprisingly Leona enjoys it, who would have thought that dealing with himself in magift is thrilling, unlike dealing the other weaklings. Maybe he should try to challenge the other him in a chess, that would be interesting.

At the end of the day, Leona prefers to have just one of him because he can have you all by himself. Right after Crewel gives him the potion for the cure, the other him disappears, making the whole Savannaclaw can breathe again. It is suffocating to have two Leonas for the Savannaclaw’s students. If they fuck up and make Leona’s mood worse, say good bye! May the Great Seven bless their souls. All he needs is your touch after he is back to normal and after dealing with a lot of annoying things. Oh, no worries, he WILL NOT forgive the perpetrator who did this to him. He sighs in relief and pulls you closer to his body. Now, you are all his alone.

I DO NOT OWN TWISTED WONDERLAND & DO NOT REPOST MY WORKS.

[mushiemadarame]

Getting Started BL RecList

Back in 2022, when I first started watching BL – though it was far from my first foray into the genre* –, I went in guns blazing without much of an idea where to start and where it would lead me. Now, in 2024, I have almost 500 BL series and movies under my belt and I realise it might feel a little overwhelming to choose where to start for someone who dives into the current landscape for the first time. That’s why I thought I would compile a completely personal and biased rec list for beginners who might want a little guidance, completely based on my own experience and journey into this amazing and highly entertaining world. Links for where to watch are in an alternate version of this post because of the Tumblr link limit and if you have trouble finding any or specific versions of any of the shows, my askbox is at your disposal. Hope you enjoy!

*while I’ve been reading Yaoi Manga since I was about 11, excluding very few exceptions, it’s only recently that I’ve gotten into the genre on the screen. That is to say, I wasn’t entirely clueless to begin with.

The Fluff - Happy endings assured, along with some side-stitching comedies.

⇢About Youth - Just so heartwarming and lovely, it has a great OST and an interesting family conflict theme to it. It’s cute and it’s wonderful. ⇢Bad Buddy - Such a classic even though it’s fairly recent. I think it’s perfect for a beginner with its classic enemies-to-lovers dynamic and a Romeo and Juliet kind of deal going on. ⇢Cherry Magic! JPN/Cherry Magic! TH - I know some might want to kill me for what I’m about to say but I personally didn’t love the Japanese version of this story and very much adored the Thai one. However, the Japanese show is a must-watch because it’s definitely a staple in Japanese BL and even though I didn’t love the series itself, the movie played me like a fiddle. The Thai version immediately became one of my absolute favourites, on like, episode one. So… give both a try. + Movie ⇢Fish Upon the Sky - I had no idea people hated this show as much as they do, I actually love it. It was the first BL that had me in stitches and even upon rewatches, it hasn’t failed to live up to what I first thought of it. This is just pure crack and it’s awesome. ⇢Kieta Hatsukoi - Sweet, so very very sweet. It’s Japan’s brand of sweet too which some might find a little unsatisfactory. When I first gave it a try, I didn’t quite get the hype but then it went in interesting places for me and now I highly recommend it. + Thai remake ⇢My School President - THEE high school BL. I have watched many others and none of them have impressed me and entertained me like this one. I even like the music. GMMTV did not know how much gold it had struck when they signed GemFourth. ⇢Old Fashion Cupcake - A mature story about finding love and yourself later in life in the guise of a fluffy show. This is very much a case of more than meets the eye and everything from the aesthetics to the story elevates it to a classic. ⇢Our Dining Table - The perfect exploration of found family for me. I love this show so much, I cried almost every single episode and it really really surprised me in many ways. It’s truly a warm, comforting show with subtle imagery and masterful acting. The main actor is incredibly talented and a fucking acting chameleon. It also features the best child actor that has ever graced my screen. + Special EP 

Set Your Expectations High - High-quality shows that might ruin you for anything less.

⇢He’s Coming to Me - Could have been an underrated gem but luckily, there’s a lot of people who love this show and for good reason. It has my favourite coming out plot and it’s so original in its premise. Wonderfully complex characters and amazing acting. Ohm Pawat knocks it out of the park with this one, definitely my favourite of his. ⇢Not Me - How to even begin to explain how important this show is to me. I got a fucking tattoo of it, on my skin, forever!!!! My absolute number one BL, they will never make another like it. I love everything about it from the director, to the casting, to the silly moments. This show single-handedly endeared me to so many of GMMTV roster, it's insane. It almost ruined me for everything else and I watched it very early on too, so there was a tangible risk. 

We Like It Spicy - If you’re looking for titillating chemistry, this is for you.

⇢Big Dragon - This show compels me. Is it good? Not exactly. And yet it kept me glued to the screen every single week. The chemistry is on fire, the story is a little silly at times but the way the characters develop through it is surprisingly very well-done. I don’t know what to say, it really worked for me and it’s a great display of how sometimes you’ll come across shows that care more about titillation than story. ⇢KinnPorsche - My very, very first Thai BL and what got me back into the genre and introduced me to Thai shows in particular. It is horny, it is wild, it is toxic at times but it is the ride. I believe it might have been the first Thai BL show to truly get so much money thrown at it and it changed the entire industry. Also just so completely entertaining and fun. ⇢The Novelist - The native title for this is Pornographer so you can imagine how this belongs into a higher level of spicy. I feel like it's a very good look into the more mature side of Japanese BL while still including a compelling love story. There are tougher Japanese BL out there both in terms of themes and explicitness but this is a good primer. + Prequel (watch it second) & Sequels 1, 2, & 3

Legendary Doesn’t Always Mean Good - Titles you just can’t stop coming across, a mixed bag of quality. 

⇢2gether - I‘ll premise by saying that I really don’t like this one. I only watched it because it is inescapable when you start looking at Thai BL and I just had to know what the hype was about. It was absolutely not worth it for me but definitely belongs to the list of the ones you need to watch for the culture. + Season 2 & Movie ⇢Cupid’s Last Wish - This show makes me actively angry, genuinely throws me into a rage if I think about it too much while also having one of my favourite scenes. Overall, not great though not even all that bad. My dislike of it is not at all proportional with how bad it is. I feel like it’s a bit of a classic for a lot of reasons. Just… give it a try, it’s impossible you’ll hate it as much as I do. ⇢Dark Blue Kiss - Funnily enough, even though I really hated their part of the show, this is the one that made me a TayNew fan. It’s not offensively bad but it has a special place in hell for me for what it could have been but wasn’t – those are the shows that test me the most – and the only way I managed to watch the whole of it was thanks to the secondary couple. As a lot of other shows in this section, it’s another one for the culture. + Kiss Me Again ⇢HIStory2: Crossing the Line - The HIStory series is definitely the biggest staple of Taiwanese BL but if I had to recommend it, I would only go for specific shows like this one and two others in the list. This specifically is a little on the older side and it is just so charming. The acting in the entire series is quite good when taking into account when they were made but this is the first one with a truly enjoyable plot in my opinion. ⇢HIStory3: Trapped - Oh, this one is just plain good. I think it’s a turning point for the HIStory series and it’s very very entertaining while also having some genuine emotional beats.  ⇢Manner of Death - Manner of Death walked so KinnPorsche could run. MaxTul have done so much for the Thai BL industry and this show in particular took the risk of transposing BL into the thriller genre and opened the door for many others to mix up the formula. Plus, it’s genuinely good. ⇢Semantic Error - Everything that Korean BL can be when production is not cowardly. Sounds harsh but it’s true. It’s fun, it’s quirky, the dynamic and chemistry make it an instant classic, and it’s just so beautiful to look at. One of the most pleasant rewatches for me. ⇢Together With Me - This one is probably older than anything else Thai in this list and it shows; it gives a very good idea of where BL storylines started but it’s not exactly good. Interesting watch if you want to know where the Kings™ came from. + Bad Romance (original story, not recommended) & Season 2 ⇢We Best Love: No. 1 For You - For me, this encompasses everything Taiwanese BL can be while also showcasing where it came from. A rare, non-Thai, very frequent rewatch. + Season 2 ⇢Where Your Eyes Linger - This is the first of director Hwang Da Seul’s holy trinity and together with To My Star and Blueming is a must-watch of Korean BL. ⇢Why R U? - A formative show in my Thai BL journey and also one of the first I watched. It is definitely dated but it also really shows how Thai BL developed over time. I slightly prefer the more recent and totally different Korean remake but it’s very close.

I Don’t Want Peace I Want Problems - These characters hate boredom just as much as you.

⇢Addicted - The Cursed story with a capital C, this show is truly one of a kind. It delves into some pretty toxic and problematic narratives but it’s also the only adaptation that manages to really convey the socioeconomic message of the story it tells. Be warned that it is incomplete due to Chinese censorship, which is only the tip of the iceberg of the BTS lore. None of the adaptations have (so far) been able to get to the end of the original story, hence the reason I say it’s Cursed. + Censored Chinese remake & Thai remake (ongoing) ⇢The Eclipse - I really really loved this show until I didn’t. The acting alone is one of the best in the whole of GMMTV’s history and it touches on some very complex themes while still very much being a High School BL. The ending frustrated me to no end because it completely smashed the quality heights it had reached for some easy fluff and it just left a bitter taste in my mouth. Still, it’s very beloved by a lot of people – *cough*Jay*cough*. ⇢Love Mechanics - It’s messy and probably not to everyone’s taste but for me this is an excellent display of how much direction and chemistry can make or break a not-that-exciting story. I rewatch this constantly. + NOTE: There is a director’s cut of the first three episodes then they integrate. En of Love [▶️watch here] is the first, inferior version of the story. ⇢My Beautiful Man - This one tends to be a controversial rec. It’s probably the show that surprised me the most in this entire list and made me do a complete 180 in my opinion of it. Once I finally gave it a chance, I just couldn't stop watching it, and it gets even better as it continues in the following season and the epilogue. + Season 2 & Movie ⇢My Stand-In - A very recent addition, I am obsessed with it. There is not one episode I didn’t like and for me this really managed to make the relationship work despite the toxicity and the atrocities. The acting is just splendid, I will now forever be a fan of Up and Poom. I love it. ⇢To Sir, With Love - This is fully a soap opera. I haven’t seen it recommended as much as others because of how long and how specifically in the soap opera genre it is. But! – big but – if you manage to get through the whole of it, you are primed for any other BLs that use the same narrative style or very close narrative styles like Century of Love. For me, it contextualised a lot of other Thai shows I’ve watched and in the end, though it feels longer than it should be, I actually really liked it. But man, life is way too short to ever rewatch it.

So You Want It Artsy - That snobby friend who only watches French Indie films you hate to admit are actually excellent.

⇢180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us - The biggest draw of this show is the shooting style which perfectly complements the themes in the story. A masterclass in acting with complex characters, I know a lot of people find it hard to get through because of the theatrical style it employs but for me that’s a huge plus. I highly discourage watching it all at once, I think it’s a show that needs its time to be watched. A real feast for the eyes.  ⇢Blueming - A cinematographic work of art. The plot is not that complicated, it relies a lot on the emotional beats and the complex inner lives of the protagonists. Part of the HDS holy trinity so you just gotta watch it. It’s fairly brief. ⇢The Eighth Sense - Unfortunately, I didn't end up loving this as much as basically everyone else but I do think it showed amazing promise. The ending just didn't work particularly well for me but it's definitely a very well-crafted story with amazing cinematography and great acting. ⇢I Told Sunset About You, Last Twilight in Phuket, I Promised You The Moon - If you ask people who liked this one, most will say they hate the second season because of the cheating storyline. I completely and utterly disagree. I have some minor gripes with how it ended but overall this is almost a perfect show IMO.

In Need of A Good Cry - Break-up, death, overall tragedy; for those nights you need to get it out. WARNING: some sad and tragic endings ahead.

⇢The Day I Loved You - I have a slightly controversial opinion about this one but the show is not a controversial recommendation at all. It’s plain good. I feel like it might be the only Filipino BL I’ve truly enjoyed and it’s definitely the only one you’ll find in this list. ⇢Eternal Yesterday - You go into this and you already know how much it’s going to break your heart but you never stop hoping for that happy ending. This one really devastated me because even though I knew it was going to end sadly, it managed to surprise me in the way it got there. ⇢HIStory3: Make Our Days Count - I’ve heard so many people say to just skip the end of the second to last episode and the whole of the finale and I get it. I would probably do the same upon rewatch but I don’t recommend skipping it if it’s your first time. Masterful character development and acting, I wish the rest of the HIStory series had maintained the same level of storytelling but alas, it didn’t. ⇢Kissable Lips - I didn't think vampires could make me this emotional. Way ahead of its time, we might never see another like this from South Korea.  ⇢Life: Love on the Line - Frustrating at times, pays off in a big way at the end. Very few others have made me cry as much. NOTE: make sure to watch the director’s cut. ⇢The On1y One - Also a very recent addition. This one can truly boast doing the slow-burn right. There were a couple of episodes that got a little shaky toward the end and if it ends up not getting a second season, I might commit arson but damn if the emotional beats didn’t work in a big way. I was played and I didn’t even wanna watch it at first.

The Self-referentials - We love a story that knows its own genre.

⇢A Man Who Defies the World of BL - Pure and absolute comedy from Japan, it parodies and deconstructs every single trope there is. The comedy is very in-your-face but instead of cringing, it consistently makes me die with laughter. Technically ongoing but unsure whether it'll get a fourth season. ⇢Kabe Koji - I have to admit I don’t remember a lot about this show aside from how much it impressed me when I watched it and the people to whom I’ve recommended it with the caveat that at the beginning it seems a little silly and not that good have come back to tell me that it was totally worth the watch, which is exactly the feeling I remember getting from watching it and why I recommend it. It’s formative, I just don’t remember why. ⇢Lovely Writer - I specifically chose to watch this when starting to dive into Thai BL because it deals with the Behind the Scenes of how BL shows are made and it was essential to my understanding of how fanservice works in this specific industry and definitely put me on the right path to find out more on the subject. Other than that, it’s fairly good and fluffy though I’m not a fan of one specific trope it uses.

Genre Outliers - BLs that like to mix it up a bit.

⇢He/She/It - Short and weird. I feel like this is very much one of a kind and I would watch it if only because it’s so damn intriguing even though it could have flourished with a bigger budget. However, it’s lovable also because it’s so obviously a small-budget project. ⇢Love for Love’s Sake - It definitely deserves the reputation it gets. It starts with catapulting you into one story and perfectly uses it to mirror the actual point of the show. The love story is excellent and the medium it uses in-world was a stylistic and instrumental dream. It knows exactly what it’s doing and it’s a masterful execution of the isekai genre while also keeping well within the BL world. ⇢The Warp Effect - Stretching the definition of BL a little as technically, the protagonist is a straight (up for debate) dude. That isn’t to say this isn’t very much a queer story with compelling queer characters and a fair dose of fun. I also absolutely adore how it talks about sex and feel like its approach to the topic is extremely sensitive and well-done. Plus, it’s genuinely funny. ⇢Till the World Ends - I will forever be grateful to Jay for convincing me to give this a try. It’s a little gorey and none of the characters are very good people – aside from Art. The fact that it came from a smaller, almost indie studio is incredible and it is brave as hell for choosing the subject matter it did and executing it the way it did. Michael Kiettisak is the love of my life (though this is not the show that originated my undying love for him, do ask me about it). NOTE: some of the videos on YT are membership-restricted but censored versions are available on the original channel.

Complicated Recs - Shows I have trouble recommending without a disclaimer but trust me, you need to see them.

⇢Secret Crush on You - I can’t possibly explain in just two or three sentences why you should watch it. It’s cringey, it’s ridiculous, and so so hard to get through but!!!! Just come talk to me about it if you want to know more ���cause my thoughts about this are so conflicting I can’t get into it here. If you get through this one, you can get through anything. Just watch it and then come yell at me because you hated it and hold me responsible for convincing you. ⇢TharnType - This is even harder to justify than the previous one. Simply put: it is so wildly popular and well-known, you just have to experience it for the culture. On the other hand, I maintain that with a few tweaks – and they would genuinely be just a few though some of them major –, this show could have been groundbreaking. Again, if you want me to say more than that, you’ll have to leave me an ask. + Special 1, Season 2 & Special 2

Underrated Gems - Nobody talks about them and I’m very sad about it.

⇢The Best Story - Short, sweet, heart-breaking. A very overlooked show if you consider it stars YinWar and even though it’s one of the first they did together, it already showcases how well they work as a pair. One day, I will get the epilogue I deserve. ⇢Dear Doctor, I’m Coming for Soul - I cannot understand why this doesn’t get recommended in the same breath as Manner of Death. I found it completely by accident and loved it instantly. Stylistically, very much in the same category as MoD for me though I might like the emotional beats in this one a little more. ⇢Light on Me - So underrated. It has such a gentle touch with dealing about young love. Perfect display of how tender and delicate teenage love can be, it made my heart clench and filled me with joy. ⇢Long Time No See - Some of the older Korean BLs are surprisingly forward compared to what we get today and this is only one, excellent example of it. While it does have some spice, you should also watch it for the plot. Short and extremely lovable.  ⇢Love Is Better the Second Time Around - Why 👏 does 👏 nobody 👏 talk 👏 about 👏 this 👏 show!!! 👏 The music choices alone made it such an entertaining watch. I can only describe this as unexpected.  ⇢Love Class - I can't understand the absolute loathing I’ve seen people have for this show at all, especially for the second season. I loved it, both times. I especially loved the secondary couples in the second season but both times I was blindsided by how much I enjoyed it and how much of a left turn it took. Came for the romance, stayed for the plot twists. + Season 2 (not a continuation of the previous season) ⇢Our Days - This is another show I remember very little about aside from being very struck by the stylistic choices. The plot isn’t especially original but I was very intrigued by its pacing and its narrative style which is what stuck with me. I'm including it because I watched it fairly early in my BL watching experience and it definitely primed me for shows coming from lesser-known studios. ⇢Rak Diao - I will never ever get over the fact that this didn’t get a second season. Not only did it need it, it deserved it. This is shot like a sit-com, which means fake laughter and the kind of comedy that comes with that but it gets unexpectedly deep as it goes and does a wonderful job of conveying the emotions throughout the progression of the love story. I would have never expected to like it as much as I did, it holds a very dear place in my heart. ⇢Something In My Room - Such a lovely and heartwarming show despite the sad ending. I don’t really have the words to describe it, I just really loved it and would like for more people to know it.

Personal Faves - Are these good? That’s irrelevant. I love them, therefore they’re the best.

⇢The End of The World With You - This show was a journey. I knew exactly where it was going but it made me excited to find out how it would get there. The ending is a little goofy solely because of the low-budget VFX but emotionally, it really worked for me. ⇢Theory of Love - This is quite literally my problematic fave. I always skip most of the side plots when rewatching it and it’s the show I managed to trap my best friend into watching BL with. I genuinely adore KhaoThird’s story, I know a lot of people don’t like how their relationship begins but I think the character development is just done so well that it makes it work. Plus, I love the way it combines all the references into its own story and the Special EP always makes me tear up a little. Huge, huge emotional attachment to this one on my part. ⇢The Time of Fever - Technically, this is a spin-off prequel. It tells the story of the secondary couple from Unintentional Love Story and how they got to the point we find them in that one. It’s beautiful both aesthetically and story-wise. The acting is just excellent and the chemistry is out-of-this-world. I would personally recommend watching ULS first, then this one, then only the DongHee and HoTae parts from ULS again but it’s up to you. I will get that DongHeeHoTae-centric second season or die trying. + Unintentional Love Story (main story) ⇢To My Star + Season 2 - This show, to me, is a staple but I feel like it doesn’t tend to make the big names list. It is not only in my top three BL shows but also in my list of favourite shows ever of any genre. It’s absolutely essential to watch season two as it is quite different from the first one and much more developed. In general, I like season two a little more than the first but that does not mean the first is lacking in anything. It’s very marginal. Genuinely, this show can play my emotions like maybe only one or two others I’ve watched.

This concludes this very long and self-indulgent list of recommendations. If you’ve gotten this far, thank you so much for reading and please do shoot me an ask or a comment or a DM if you want to talk about any of these shows or others with me, it would genuinely make my day!

A/N 1: some of the titles in this list have an ��extended universe’ situation going on. Feel free to contact me if you need help navigating it. A/N 2: just because they’re in this list, does not mean I consider all these shows to be the top of the crop. These are specifically shows that I think would be ideal for a beginner to get into the genre, there are many many others that I would readily recommend that didn’t make the cut and that I would be glad to elaborate on if asked. A/N 3: if you ever find yourself thinking “What the hell are they even saying??” while reading this, just imagine me adding an “in my opinion” to the end of every sentence.

[ofmdrecaps]

07/25-26/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Taika Waititi; Vico Ortiz: Classes; OFMD BTS; Galaxy Con Raleigh: Con, Nathan, Vico, Kristian; Gypsy Taylor; Andrew Deyoung; Boris McGiver; Adopt Our Crew Highlights: Articles; Prompts; Gold Derby/TellTale TV Voting Reminders; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Today's Taika;

== David Jenkins ==

Chaos Dad, David Jenkins has been really active on Twitter and even poking his head into Instagram! I didn't share all of the ones he re-blogged today because I ran out of image space, but he's definitely keeping us all in mind. (I sure wish Kamala had really said that!)

Source: Djenkins Twitter

David also shared our lovely @cosmosart-s' recent Ed+Butterflies sketch on Instagram <3

Source: David Jenkins' Instagram

He also acknowledged what we've all been thinking and discussing in meta for a while now-- the differences in memory for the S1 "You Wear Fine Things Well" scene.

Source: David Jenkins' Instagram

== Rhys Darby ==

There's a new podcast available, this time with Rhys Darby visiting! Check out: Saving Sheep From a UFO w/ Rhys Darby!

Source: Looking Up Podcast

== Taika Waititi ==

Taika was out at the Louis Vuitton Foundation Party 2024 in Paris recently and boy is he looking suave.

Source: Rafhits Instagram / Icon France / VogueSpain / Anthonyghnassia /EmiliaPiaLuisaWickstead / VasJMorgan / etalkctv

More Time Bandits Interviews! Did you happen to watch Time Bandits yet on Apple TV?

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Consequence Daily (@consequencedaily)

Source: ConsquenceDaily

== Vico Ortiz ==

Vico has another acting class coming up September 1! Classes are Sundays 11a-4p September 1, 8, 22 & 29 * 9/8 will be taught by a SUBSTITUTE TBA You can enroll here!

Source: Vico Ortiz' Instagram

Vic has also been keeping up with our BTS needs by posting more on their Patreon! Here's some sneak peaks-- if you don't subscribe already and would like to see all the OFMD BTS as well as other works they do, you can visit Patreon.

Source: Vico Ortiz Patreon

== Galaxy Con Raleigh (Con, Nathan, Vico, Kristian) ==

Con, Nathan, Vico, and Kristian are all at Galaxy Con Raleigh this weekend! I'm combining their sections to make it a bit easier to keep track! They've all been kind enough to send us pre-convention photos!

Source: Nathan Foad's Instagram Stories / BigSamTompson's Instagram (Nathan's Tagged Photos)

Source: Kristian Nairn's Instagram

Source: Con O'Neill's Instagram

Source: Vico's Instagram

== Gypsy Taylor ==

Gypsy Taylor is working on a new show -- "All Her Fault" and it's going to be premiering on Peacock once it's ready! Keep an eye out for it!

Source: Gypsy Taylor's Instagram

== Andrew DeYoung ==

You may remember one of our lovely writers-- Andrew DeYoung, well he's written and directed a new movie, "FRIENDSHIP" a comedy that will premier in September at the Toronto International Film Festival!

Source: Andrew DeYoung's Instagram

== Boris Mcgiver ==

Our friend Boris Mcgiver, aka Father Bonnet has a new show "Teacup", a sci-fi horror thriller premiering on October 10th, on Peacock!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Ashley Edner - Tancharoen (@ashleyedner)

Source: BorisMcGiver's Instagram Stories

== Adopt Our Crew Highlights ==

Our friends over at @adoptourcrew have been king everyone up to date with the latest articles on OFMD.

Source: Decider.com

They've also been keeping twitter engaged with some wonderful prompts! What's your favourite piece of OFMD Art? (Your own or someone else's!) @adoptourcrew would love to hear from you!

Source: AdoptOurCrew's Twitter

== Gold Derby Reminders ==

Thank you @adoptourcrew for the reminder! July 30 is the last day to vote! Please get your votes in if you haven't and you plan to! https://www.goldderby.com/leagues/

Source: Adopt Our Crew's Tumblr

== Tell Tale TV Poll ==

We're neck and neck yall! The poll is open through the end of July and you can vote every day!

Source: OFMD-Ann's Tumblr

== Love Notes ==

Miss you lovelies, sending so many good vibes your way.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by SWATHY SIVRAM (@theartytales)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by SWATHY SIVRAM (@theartytales)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by SWATHY SIVRAM (@theartytales)

== Daily Darby / Today's Taika ==

It's been a minute since I've been blessed with this gif, so you too shall get to see Ed's heart eyes. Gif courtesy of the brilliant @captain-flint <3

[idontactuallywherepjs]

pt. 1

So. I started reading The Rangers Apprentice last night, and I only got up to chapter six i think (Will's just arrived at Halt's cottage for his first day of training and Halt remarks that at least he's on time and already had breakfast). And. I'm in love. Im buying the first three books today.

Anyways, assorted thoughts.

I really like the dynamic all of the wards have with each other. Like yeah these are kids who grew up together and love and get on each other's nerves in equal measure.

Will and Alyss being the only two who don't remember their parents is both heartbreaking and makes perfect sense in a weird way? I don't really know how to explain it but it just fits.

It also makes them confiding in each other about what craft their aiming for that much more impactful.

But it's also infinitely funnier to me that Alyss didn't look up. They've known each other their entire lives, literally, and she didn't. Look. Up. Comedy gold.

I just about cried at Will's reasoning for battleschool.

For whatever reason, Martin reminds me of a rat. I want to hit him with a frying pan. He's delightful.

I loved all the Craftmasters. Yeah their personalities and descriptions aren't groundbreaking or anything but they still seem neat.

Chubb's wooden ladle.

Jenny and Chubb's entire interaction. Him hitting her on the head. so great.

Will being able to feel Halt's eyes on him is so good. Like yeah! He's a natural! (I hope he falls on a face a few times while training but I love the detail that he was chosen because of his potential, not because he'll be perfect out the gait, and I like that his potential as a ranger is in obvious to him.

Will's pranks and mischief is so good. I love that detail. And the bunnies oh my gosh. I was laughing with Lady Pauline.

The second that paper was mentioned in knew what Will was going to do.

I did however think that the paper would be blank.

Will just causally doing. All of That. to get up the tower. Holy shit. Horrifying. scaling the wall especially.

I hope someone told the guard on duty what was happening right above his head i think his reaction would be funny.

My heart stopped when Halt grabbed Wills hand. Like I could tell it was coming there was no way he wasn't getting caught but i was still startled for some reason.

I hope nobody told the guards outside Baron Arald's office anything about what happened that night. Let them be confused.

Baron Arald is the funniest character so far and nobody laughs. "This time, use the stairs." Hilarious! that was so funny. poor guy is taken way to seriously i love him.

I really like the pacing so far. just something ive noticed. I takes it's time and lingers on certain scenes where other books would jump ahead. I like it.

I think ive forgotten how much i love this part of a story. it's the beginning. Ive just met the characters. I've got no idea what happens next. The plot hasn't really kicked off. The big bad is just in the distance. It's nice. It's relaxing. I love it.

[vitaminseetarot]

PAC: Your January Forecast 🎇❄🦢

Sup y'all, I'm back for the very last PAC I'm gonna write for 2023. By the end of the weekend, we will have shifted to a whole new year, with a new moon close in tow. I'm gonna be honest, this has been a rough year for me, but not without its bright spots. Like the birth of this blog, for one! I'm already planning the 1 Year Special.

The plan is only to expand from here to see what more there is to do! There was a lot I wanted to do this year but didn't get around to doing because of life, so I have a lot lined up for January.

Thank you for your support this past year in helping my blog grow! The circle is small, but each like and reblog makes a difference, especially to newcomers like me.

Please choose your swan ornament below to find out about how your January will look for the new year. Instead of Tarot today, I'll be using my Black Salt Lenormand deck and Astro Dice to get details along with oracles for advice.

Pile 1 - Black Swan Pile 2 - White Swan Pile 3 - Gold Swan

Pile 1 - Black Swan

Death, Sun; 49. Sun A♦, Cross 6♣, Crossroads Q♦; Uranus, 11th House, Aquarius

Hi, pile 1! Hope you're feeling alive and well for 2024. I kinda called this the "zombie pile" while drawing cause I'm getting this sluggish energy dragging along. Mumbling, creeping, hair disheveled. Goodness, this past year had you wiped out, didn't it? If you're feeling pressured for a resolution, I wouldn't, because for you I think simply sloughing off the old year like snake skin is your main priority for January. I'm hearing Usher's lyrics: "I feel like a zombie come back to life." Maybe you could treat this month like an extended New Year's Eve party. You can't force yourself to be excited for it, but you can slowly build up to it.

There is an emphasis on positive thinking with this pile. You have two Suns from different decks. Doing what brings you simple joy will be healing for you this month. Focusing on little joys can help you shift perspective. Being in the present is very important right now, and you're being asked not to think too much about last year as it will only drain you of further energy. You can't draw healing to yourself if you're spending all your Magic Points on looking backwards for answers. It it feels difficult to be positive, think outside the box at how you can move away from past thinking, like making a vision board for what you most desire to experience this year.

One of the real impressive things about your reading are the dice. You have Uranus, its natural house 11, and its sign Aquarius. Emphasis on CHANGE, much? You know how in movies, where the main character is falling into darkness and has relinquished all hope of being saved, and just as it fades to black someone swoops in to help them while casually laughing off "hah, yeah, I just happened to be in the neighborhood when I saw you falling into an infinite chasm, y'know?"

The word "Deus Ex Machina" is also popping up, or "god out of machine". It's a Latin term referring to an ancient Greek theater technique where a crane would lower an actor dressed as a deity onto the stage during the final act of a comedy, delivering sudden divine intervention and saving the day for the heroes. In other words, there is massive and very unexpected change for you, one that's gonna pull you out of the sluggish stupor of 2023. This is why resolutions aren't important for you now; whatever 2024 will be for you, it's coming in lightning hot and will do that for you.

And I think this change, however large and surprising, will be ultimately wonderful for you. There is so much sunlight emerging from this fog, new life will be breathed in for you by divine planning. It's going to help you work through some of the damage that last year left behind. It will also help you pivot to your next chapter in life. It may feel weird going into a new year with very little expectations, not knowing where you're going to end up next, but it'll be worth it. When the door swings open for you, it will BURST open, so stay on the bright side and focus on regenerating your health for now.

May your new year be shockingly bright, pile 1!

Pile 2 - White Swan

Strength, 25. Sapphire; Garden 8♠, Anchor 9♠, Person A♥; Gemini, 12th House, Pluto

Hello, pile 2! This month will be a quiet one for you, in a good way. This will be a time of retreat for you. If you found yourself being rather social at the end of 2023, expect the new year to start off with a whimper. I see you going into a hermit mode and disengaging from regular activities, especially involving other people. I get the sense that this pile is the type to want to overextend and please everyone around them. If you need a resolution suggestion from me, it's to put the brakes on now before you careen over the edge. January is putting a halt to this behavior.

Yes, you are strong. No, you do not always need to be strong for everybody else. It will wear you thin to even try, and you may end up resentful over it. It's not worth the struggle. I'm not asking you to snap at anyone who comes too close, but consider not adding more of other peoples' errands to your schedule. Consider saying, "actually, I can't go today," without feeling the need to explain why. You have a right to your own personal space away from distractions now.

This pile could belong to a group of people or community that's close to you, which could be going through a lot of hell or has been in the past year. They may have asked a lot from you with few other options. It's made you have to stand up and advocate, at the cost of your own issues being put on the back burner. It is not selfish to walk away for a while and take care of yourself, doubly so if the group in question deals with a lot of arguing and gossip. If it feels bad, trust your gut and keep your distance for now. Don't try to solve big arguments while Mercury is retrograding.

I know how Pluto in the 12th house is, as it's prominent in my chart. Imagine walking downstairs to get to your basement, only for the stairs to never end until you find yourself floating in a weird little wonderland. Somewhere, in that surreal underground mindscape, is a deeply entrenched karmic pattern that may elude you at first. Some shadow work may be required here to dig through the trenches for unpolished gems. If a pesky pattern is repeating in your life, it's time to withdraw and connect to your dreams and subconscious for clues. This pattern may have something to do with this group.

You're actually going to get more progress done by meditating and seeking out nature rather than getting too involved with these issues. The time will come when things can be handled with a clearer mindset. But your higher self is pulling you inward to help ground you through this, to remind you that you are your own amazing being even when you're separate from these people. You have the strength to stand on your own, otherwise there wouldn't be so many folks seeking you out in need. Sapphire wants you to marry your heart with your mind. It's a stone of wisdom guided by compassionate understanding and care. You spin your wheels overthinking an issue, when instead coming back to your heartspace will provide the key.

Take it easy this winter, pile 2, may your dreams give clarity and hope for 2024!

Pile 3 - Gold Swan

Protection, 15. Opal; Bouquet Q♠, Person A♥, Crossroads Q♦; 4th House, Capricorn, Mercury

What's going on, pile 3? Looks like somebody wants to enter hibernation mode, lol. I don't blame you one bit. As the full moon in Cancer has passed and the season changes, there's a strong desire to nestle into the home. Your house will be like your castle for you to improve during this month. You may feel up to redecorating or rearranging furniture to make it feel more cozy or season appropriate as you settle in. Or you may simply desire to clear out old things to decide what to keep.

You may want to do a spiritual cleansing of the house to ring in the New Year, too. Try infusing magic herbs like lemon verbena into your cleaning products, or toss cinnamon outside the front door while ringing a bell to invite prosperity in. A simple incense stick with a very fresh, mild scent like lavender can also do the trick. Does your family have a special trick or recipe they use? Whatever herb and scent combination brings out that "New Year New Me" feeling is best!

I heard loud and clearly, "YOU'RE PROTECTED!" for whomever needs to hear it most. Things might feel shaky and ungrounded at the moment. I wanna wrap a big blanket around y'all. You're being totally protected right now by your guides, so please don't let the uncertainties of 2024 leave your head dizzied. Yes, there's a lot of plans to be drawn out and a lot more work to be done, and you may not know where you're heading next, but perhaps there's a reason we like to begin the year at such a slow quiet time, after all the festivities have passed. It's not sound to start off in a rush.

You're being heavily affected by Sun in Capricorn doubled with the current Mercury retrograde, regardless of your chart placements. This is absolutely not a time for rash decision making, even if it feels you're not being your most productive. Our modern society doesn't like it when workers take a break or listen to their body's needs in any way. It will always have its excuses for its ruthless standards. After a while, though, you have to learn to shrug those expectations off and do what's right for you, or you'll risk burning out before the new year has even started.

Some of you might be thinking of even doing the Dry January trend as part of your resolution. If it's a serious issue, I'd talk to your doctor about how to do it sustainably. If you're already stressed and at risk of burnout, more pressure is not going to help. But a sober month could prove beneficial for you overall. This is not a command for you to have a Dry January if you're not interested; this message is for those who already plan on doing so. Try to take it one day at a time, keep your head free of self criticism, and don't guilt yourself over "cheat days". I will be doing one as well, so please reach out if you need a supporting voice.

Wishing you all the best to come this year pile 3, may you succeed in your resolutions!

This reading has not been evaluated by the FDA to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease or infection. Please ask your physician before going online.

Cards Used: Black Salt Lenormand, Prism Oracle, Crystal Healing Cards, Astro Dice.

2023, @VitaminseeTarot ™

[bridgertonandchocolate]

I’m slowly starting to come around on season 3 part 2. Still needing to really focus on the beautiful moments we got because I still have some of the same opinions I had before.

I did see a different perspective of Colin’s reaction and it’s made me come around a little so it’s easier for me to watch. I just still wish some of these points would have been introduced sooner. Like the fact that Colin is super sensitive. I wouldn’t have thought that at all about him before Violet just said it. I also reminded myself of something Colin said to Pen in season 2 episode 7 which was how she’s always been so constant and loyal to him so when he discovers her it now makes a little more sense why he feels so betrayed that this is something she kept from him. I still wish he would’ve come around sooner but you know.

Really hope they didn’t cut everything that was rumored to be cut out. Because I think they would have been essential.

Anyway regardless of all of that I now want two things:

1. A featherington spinoff. Would be comedy gold. Just the adventures of prudence and Philippa and navigating motherhood. Could be hilarious. No drama just pure comedy.

2. A movie starring Luke and Nic. Rom com would be great but I don’t care what it is. They’re so good together. The press tour ended up being more entertaining than Bridgerton and I just feel like we can’t have them just in Bridgerton. They need more projects together.

[donutwatches]

MHA 2.19 - Everyone's Internship

So I got out of a 3 hour long power outage and started making this post, but the power went out AGAIN. I was getting worried that I wouldn't be able to post today, but I have resorted to finishing this on my phone!

Only 1 part for this episode since I am pretty sure most of it was filler.

I love this Seal Hero. Does he only exist in filler? He is cute.

Ok so the Froppy side-quest was fun, but I don't have a ton to say about it so....let's skip forward.

So what did you do for your internship? Oh, I just helped handle a HOSTAGE SITUATION.

Meanwhile, our tough guys are cleaning trash in the park (also an important job mind you). It reminds me of Deku cleaning the beach.

I LOOOOOVE this as an internship for Uraraka. She really locked in to working on hand-to-hand combat after her experiances at the Sports festival. I just hope we get to see her put these skills to use.

I never thought I would see an image of Uraraka swinging a knife. Yes girl, stab me.

Say what you want about Bakugo, but he is efficient. It is always on sight, no questions.

No.

This made me laugh way more than it should have.

This is the exact sort of PR lesson that Bakugo needs. Someone like Stain would scoff at this, but BJ (lol) is right that presentation matters. People are more likely to trust a hero with a good image.

Bakugo is adorable with his new hair style and those jeans, 😆.

Ah. The brutal honesty of children. Something tells me this is going to end badly.

It is like his Dad is telling him to do his chores. Basic politeness is hard work for Bakugo. Best Jeanist is asking A LOT just by telling him not to scream at children.

Aaanndd who could have predicted this outcome? His insecurity runs hella deep for him to get so defensive because of little kid comments.

The way Bakugo's hair poofed back up when he yelled is comedy gold.

Something tells me an angry Pomeranian on the lose is going to have a starring role in these kids nightmares come bedtime.

Bakugo is terrible but so funny to me, idc.

Click here for the masterlist

Click for episode 20

[thenewgirl76]

You know what I have yet to see in any fics where Danny is biologically related to either Bruce and Damian or one of the other batboys? The Mansons attempting to use that to their advantage and enhance their public image.

Either by spouting false praises and lying about being in Danny's corner while interacting with Bruce and his sons, or after discovering Danny's true heritage being the ones to take him in after a bad reveal in the hopes of getting into Bruce's inner circle.

Many usually gravitate towards Vlad as the abusive foster or guardian Danny needs to be rescued from, but his best friend's snooty parents that regularly look down on him just because of the elder Fenton's antics and reputation would do just as nicely.

Just imagine the comedy gold of Jeremy and Pamela barely masking their disdain for their daughter's "troubled friend" by pretending to dote on him while in Bruce's presence during a gala. Not realizing that Bruce along with every other Wayne in attendance can see right through them and is simply humoring them as well as biding his time.

Or if angst (hopefully followed by some comfort) is more your thing maybe have Danny, still reeling from Jack and Maddy's rejection latch on to the Mansons out of desperation for an adult he can trust and start believing they've had a genuine change of heart and come to care for him despite both Sam and Ida continually telling him otherwise. Only to feel the sting of betrayal a second time when while at a gathering Bruce or one of his boys approaches and tells him the Mansons are just using him to get in their good graces then show proof when Danny tries to deny it.

[shantismurf]

"The Mushroom Mine" sign by @shantismurf, with assistance from @tickles-ivory

As part of the celebration of the one year anniversary of the Bagginshield Book Club, we asked the lovely @chrononautintraining a few questions about this wonderful work.

June 2024 Author Q&A with Chrononautical

Q1. What name would you like us to use and what are your pronouns?

A1. Chrononautical or Chrono, She/Her

Q2. How many years have you been writing? 

A2. Most of my life, but posting publicly for about 15 years.

Q3. What do you think of as your writing style - are you a plotter or pantster?

A3. Pantster, primarily, though I've learned my lessons and do like to know where a story is going to end when I start it these days so I try to plot. 

Q4. What’s your favorite genre/trope to write? 

A4. Speculative fiction: stories about magic or science fiction, primarily. 

Q5. Is there a genre/trope you haven't written as much of yet that you're excited about for future writing?

A5. I'd like to do more comedy.

Q6. Was there an idea or scene that inspired A Passion for Mushrooms?

A6. Passion for Mushrooms is one hundred percent inspired by the quote I used for an epigraph: "Hobbits have a passion for mushrooms, surpassing even the greediest likings of Big People." - The Fellowship of the Ring, J.R.R. Tolkien. 

When I decided to write it, the fandom already had more than a few stories about Bilbo planting gardens and deciding to stay in Erebor with a miraculously alive Thorin. I was completely here for all of that, of course, but I wanted a story where the garden wasn't special because of gold or rare plants bought with gold. I wanted there to be a treasure that Bilbo could appreciate with the Baggins half of his heart, as well as the Tookish bit. And I know next to nothing about mountains, but I do know mushrooms do okay in caves, so... 

Q7. Did you do any special research before writing the work?

A7. If you're asking this because I go deep on How To Pluck A Chicken In A Medieval Kitchen during the cooking scenes, you're right and you should say it. I am a middling cook, but all of my ingredients come from grocery stores. I had to do a fair bit of research on the cooking aspects of the story that were furthest from my own experience. Fortunately, the professor already put tomatoes and potatoes in Middle-earth, so I didn't have to go Full Historical. 

Q8. Did the story change from how you originally envisioned it? Were there scenes or plot elements you had to cut out?

A8. It absolutely did. Because I am, as previously said, a pantster. I wanted a bigger bang for the ending of the story than I was set up to get. I could have stopped with Bilbo and Thorin getting together and had some simple falling action, but that didn't perfectly tie the subplot of Dis and Tauriel back to the main pairing, which I knew I wanted. Having Doron try to poison Bilbo was actually a late in the game choice. If I'd planned that from the start, I would have threaded him into more of the middle sections of the novel. 

As for cutting things out, the additional stories in the series started as deleted scenes/reader requests that I couldn't find use for. So most of what I cut didn't end up in the rubbish bin. Anything that wound up there really wasn't worth posting. 

Q9. Do you have a favorite moment from the entire series?

A9. I still really like "A Spy In The Shire" a lot. I know it's so self-indulgent to say that about a story focusing on an OC, but if the point of the Battle of Five Armies is to reclaim Erebor for the dwarves, then I want that to mean something. I want the average dwarf to be in a bad place. I want the average dwarf to need Erebor the way Thorin needs Erebor, to be willing to do anything to get back to the Lonely Mountain. Because if that's the case, then all the sacrifice means something. When I talk about this one luckless dwarf on the world's silliest quest to figure out how to help the king hook up with a hobbit, I'm talking about hope for the future. I'm talking about all the people who long for and dream of the home that Thorin was willing to die to reclaim. I think about them going back there and living better lives. It brings me peace.

[ralexsol]

watching "Listen" from 12 and then directly afterwards "The Devil's Chord" from 15 was the wrong decision on my part. it only made the devil's chord that much more painful. like listen isn't like an insanely good episode or anything but it. actually feels like a sci-fi show. and it has a very touching ending with clara and kid doctor.

a better comparison would be with "Robot of Sherwood" from 12 vs. devil's chord. they're both the 2nd episode of their respective doctors, with the plot being the companion's "i've always wanted to go to-" dream. both are EXCELLENT companion dreams: robin hood and the beatles. both have INSANE levels of potential for shenanigans between people of legendary status and doctor + companion. but um. one is done incredibly and the other is. not.

Robot of Sherwood: start in the TARDIS with doctor & companion. wanna see robin hood, oh but robin hood is not real - and wow, an idea held by a character in the intro scene will actually play a key role in both the comedy AND emotional charge for the entire episode! for the rest of the episode, you have robin hood as the 3rd protagonist in TONS of scenes, with iconic characters as his merry men and the sheriff making appearances. and look, an actual sci-fi thing going on! the guards are robots and they're stealing gold for their spaceship! cool!! and then the emotion-based ending of the doctor and robin relating over being legendary heroes who will only be remembered as such.

The Devil's Chord: start in unknown location with piano guy and his student. that's fine, it's setting up the plot, sure. get some fun piano playing and holy shit okay the villain is right here and just immediately showing their entire hand and purpose?? okay so they're killing people because they want music to themself. okay, they seem cool enough, there must be some interesting thing about them that we'll learn later. switch to TARDIS, wanna see the beatles, let's go!, montage of them watching famous musicians be shit at EMI studios. oh hey it's george martin the producer of the beatles thats fun!! annnnnnd he has more lines than ringo and george combined and this is basically the last time we will see half of the beatles! um. okay. i am dead serious half the beatles have about 2-3 lines between them and they only speak in 1 fucking scene. there's a cool scene with paul & doctor and ruby & john, i really liked how they explained the disappearance of music and the inherent terror everyone seemed to feel of the maestro (the villain) coming to get them. the scene on the rooftop is cool! im a pianist and i love orchestral music so i really liked that. but i was so terrified she was going to start singing at any moment because i cannot handle any more cringe-worthy songs in this show i just can't. this is not a musical. anyway, the whole episode falls apart when you realize oh the beatles arent actually what this episode is about and oh the maestro is literally just the character that you saw in the intro scene and they have no twist motive and no emotional charge and yeah they're the toymaker's kid so they're a "force of nature" and not an alien with cool science and they just want allll the music. and then there's long "fight" scenes and then john and paul save the day without saying a single word in a 15-second long total shot. and then there's a fully fever-dream level dance and song montage.

i dont know too much about peoples' opinions on 15 so far cause ive had spoiler tags blocked for months, but from what i HAVE seen, it's been really positive. am i blind? am i stupid? am i bigoted????? why dont i like the vibes of this season?? maybe im just spiraling because ive been so hyped to watch the beatles episode as a beatles fan for MONTHS and just can't cope with ringo and george being written out. ive only seen 3 episodes w 15. i so hope it gets better. please let it be better. if they do another musical number i will kill something. i will spontaneously combust.

[izanori]

9 more testament-related yonkoma coming right up! the previous 8 can be found here

how to read yonkoma + translation notes + etc under the cut ^^

How to Read Yonkoma/4-koma (<- means "4 panels"):

short answer:

long answer: here

-

Translation Notes:

lil hanamaru: was titled Hanamaru-kun in the original text. a hanamaru is a flower drawn on japanese kids' schoolwork when they do a good job, like a gold star. since the comic shows the flower very obviously here, i couldnt lie to you all and title it Lil' Gold Star, and i think we have no other flower-related equivalent to this, so ive decided to use this as an opportunity to teach those who dont know this little japanese culture fact. feel free to google what a hanamaru looks like!

among us: this was titled Infiltration in the original text. because im quirky, i changed it to Among Us. when people complain about translators adding in stuff that didnt exist in the original text, this is exactly what theyre talking about. im so sorry. i have to reference amogus every chance i get (fwiw: i can do this because its just comedy. i wouldnt randomly add funny references during more serious scenes)

how about a bout: original title was something like "You're Fighting!?" but uhhhh. okay, i dont even know why i changed the title of this one 😂 i think at the time i couldnt think of a way to translate the title, so i came up with something punny and related to the subject matter. just now as i reread the original text i understood it, but i like my pun better than the original and dont feel like going back and changing it. do you forgive me? 😿

memory over the material: in the very first panel, testament says in the original text something like "you can't erase me physically or any other way." because this is all comedy, i added a reference most tumblr users should get to add to the mood.

i think thats about it! tldr, i think im funny and sacrificed direct translation for comedic effect when i felt like it. common industry practice, really. i wouldnt be so loose when translating if this wasnt all comedy!

-

i wanted to add that if you want to follow me to see when i next share a translation, you should follow @cicistash instead of this blog. ill put all translations there... and art in the future, but ill tag the art so you can filter it out.

thank you so much for reading my translations! im sorry for the long wait between the first one and this! i hope the next one comes much faster. and sorry if it looks ugly, of course, im new to editing scans and such

[best-movie-ever-tournament]

What's your favorite musical from the bracket? Feel free to wait until it's eliminated to answer.

I'll be honest with you, I don't know a lot of musicals (kinda started this tournament to get recs, honestly). At least that's what I thought until i realised i had seen a bunch of the submissions. Now, granted, it was particularly popular ones, not the nichest ones, but still.

Anyway, I have a bunch of favorites, and I'll reblog this post at the end of every round with the list of eliminated movies I know and like.

For this round, we have, by alphabetical order:

Duck Soup (1933): It's completely silly and nonsensical, and I can't stand anyone involved in the plot, but it's also a great movie. The number of one liners I still quote, the entire jab at governments in general and dictatorships in particular... Groucho Marx being a gold digger and an asshole isn't new, Harpo having a horn and miming stuff isn't new, Chico speaking with a fake italian accent isn't new, but I absolutely love it anyway.

Into the Woods (2014): I know, i know, the stage musical is better, but consider: i haven't seen the stage musical. I do realise that most of what I love about it probably comes straight out of the musical itself, but there's also Meryl Streep so there's that. The first half is absolutely great and I don't care much for the second half even if there are still some bangers (the song about who's at fault and the Last Midnight among others)

My Fair Lady (1964): Haven't watched it since I was a child, and in the mean time I've learned how to speak english and what phonetics were, so I'm sure I would enjoy it even more. I can't remember much about it apart from what is common knowledge though.

Sing (2016): It's cute and funny and deep and not-so-deep and there's friendship and I'm not even a fan of animated musicals, anthro animals or the musical genre of most of the songs but. Consider. It's so good.

The Court Jester (1955): Absolute banger. Put it in front of a musical i had never heard of on the first round because I had high hopes for it. Well c'est la vie. Anyway you absolutely have to watch it. It aged very well I think, despite what the promotional materials show. It's got fencing and true love and torture and masked vigilantes and musical numbers and dancing and honestly this is my Princess Bride. Like everyone on tumblr is always like "princess bride is my entire childhood" and then point at a comedy swashbuckler with a prince trying to get the hero's girlfriend, his right hand man who's sinister, etc. Meanwhile The Court Jester has everything of that and MORE! It has a tender male lead, it has comedy at every corner, and more importantly, it is my whole childhood. I blame it for making me learn english in the first place (we only had it in english with subtitles).

The Inspector General (1949): Adapted from a russian play and yet it feels like preparatory work for The Court Jester in some way. It's still a banger don't get me wrong, and keep in mind that the version i have is not a very legal one and the image definition is very very bad. It still manages to pull through as great. I love it.

[pandoa]

Okay but Jade with the Primrose prompt! Please, I just wanna see his reaction to the mushroom one. 💀 How about having the scenario play out in the comfort of home while we're at it?

Primroses ~ “i loaf you very much” “oh my god” “you’re a berry kind person” “no, stop” “there’s so mushroom in my heart for you” “ENOUGH WITH THE PUNS—“

~jade leech x gender neutral reader~

HELLO YOU ARE A LEGEND OMG THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING THIS I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD WHEN I WROTE DOWN THIS PROMPT- i had jade in mind when i first came up with this prompt so i was so so excited when i saw your rq <3 i hope you like it!

♡eel-egally punny♡

“Okay, okay, how about this one?” you said as you lifted your legs onto the white and raven fabric of Ramshackle’s velvet-like couch. It was an oddly uneventful day at Night Raven; one that you thought would never come true at the energetic campus. And so, without a doubt in your mind, you decided to invite your dear boyfriend over to pass the time on your unusual day off from playing therapist for Crowley’s endless needs. It was the only time you could truly relax, you see, and you were determined to make the most out of it.

Even if it cost you your boyfriend’s sanity in return. 

“How do you make an octopus laugh?” a giddy smirk filled with anticipation shone on your face as you turned to the Octavinelle vice housewarden who was conveniently seated just a couple feet away from you, “With TEN-tickles.” Silent, the second year then returned your comedic advances with an empty stare.

“Okay… not amused. Got it,” you dejectedly shook your head at Jade’s solemn disposition. He could at least show some interest in your entertainment, yes? A lifeless sigh proceeded to escape your lips as you gazed back to the colorful book placed before you, searching for a suitable joke to finally impress your uncomic partner. Suddenly, however, a light twinkle in your eyes appeared as you spotted the most flawless jest ever written, “Oh! This one’s perfect, for sure!”

Jade, curious as to why you seemed to be interested in the world of comedy, then glanced your way as he stared at the strange book you were currently holding, “What are you even reading?”

“It’s Twisted Wonderland’s newest joke book, Punny Puns for Punny People! I saw it in Mr. S’s shop a few days ago and thought why not? Anyway,” you brought your attention back to your book in search of the joke you had found moments ago, “Here’s another one!”

“Why did the eel blush?” you said, giggling into your own hands with a failed attempt at a poker face.

“Why?”

“Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.”

“...”

“Prefect, I am giving you ten seconds before I disintegrate that book out of your hands and tackle you to the ground. With love, of course,” Jade calmly said with a smile gracing his face—although, his grin was more of a twisted grimace as he winced at your rather displeasing try at telling jokes. But because you were far too preoccupied with your own small world, you failed to notice the chilling voice of the merman beside you booming with a certain coldness to his tone, one that could rival the deepest, darkest areas in the open ocean.

“Wait! There’s a section filled with only puns!” a cheery applause sang from your happiness at your new discovery as you then recited off of the joke book like a royal decree being announced to influential kingdoms, “I loaf you very much.”

“Oh my Seven…”

“You’re a berry kind person.”

“No, stop—”

“There’s so mushroom in my heart for you—ACK!”

A resounding slam then echoed throughout Ramshackle’s lounge as you felt your body’s weight being knocked down and sprawled over your dorm’s couch. Your precious book had flown out of the grasps of your hands as every thought in your mind dissipated along with your book. With the sudden movement leaving you lost and disoriented, you peered up dizzy from the collision only to meet your boyfriend's tall figure pinned on top of you with gold and yellow eyes gently glaring downwards to your quickly flustered form. 

“Alright, I think that’s enough with the puns for today, don’t you think, (Y/n)?”

a/n: i fr searched for eel puns on google just to write this lmao

[sebastianstansqueen]

Something angsty maybe?

I love your writing btw and the love for Sebastian stan just makes me want to be your friend haha

Title: If This Is What It Takes

A/N: I'm back! also I hope you like it, there more comedy than angst sorry! Also as always, Like, comment and reblog are always welcome! Tagged, either send an ask or comment on this or click on Taglist open.  

Wordcount:  1,486

Warnings: Angst, fluff, mean, Bucky being slightly a creep.

Masterlist //  Tagglists 

Taglist: @cherryblossomsky - @babylooneytoonzz - @wonderlandfandomkingdom - @miraclesoflove - @amelia-song-pond - @leyannrae - @avengerlex - @pineprincess - @nik2writes - @dorothea-hwldr - @rosie-posie08 - @scxrletrecsmarvel - @chrisevansismysworld

You had worked in the same bar for the past five years seeing the same people come in and out, and you haven't met the boss yet, but from what you heard he was dangerous, but that also could have just been the buzz. You were working one night, just trying to get through another shift without having someone grope you. You were cleaning a cup, when a man in a nice suit came up and sat down, he ordered his drink and you made it, and handed it to him, you could feel his eyes on you, and you didn’t like it so you said something. “Gonna pay extra for looking?” You asked the man, the other girl behind the bar with you stopped what she was doing and looked at you with wide eyes. 

“What?” He asked with a deep gruff voice, deep with offense. 

You folded your arms and looked him up and down. “Are you going to pay extra for taking a longer look than needed?” You spoke slowly as to demeanor him. 

“You know who I am right?” He hissed. 

“Yeah, boss, I just don’t care for asshols who don’t know how to stop looking or touching.” You answered, the only person that would come to this bar in that nice of a suit would be him or one of his men. “And what kind of man Karen.” You scoffed. 

A smirk grew on Bucky’s lips as you argued with him, never had a woman told him to pay her for looking at her so to say the least this intrigued him. Then another man came in. He had shorter hair than Bucky and his hair was blond. The man whispered something into your boss's ear. “As entertaining as this is, I have business to deal with, Y/n.” He spoke your name, not even having met you he knew your name, and a wave of something hit you, and you weren’t sure if it was fear.

For the next few months leading to a year you and Bucky would have similar batter, both of you couldn’t stand one another but there was an underlying lust between the two of you as you would argue. One night was different, however, because that night Bucky told you that you needed to accompany him to a business thing since he needed a date, so you got work off rent free. He had gotten you a beautiful gown, that was green and gold, in some light it looks blue too,  and some other things to go with the stunning dress, along with a hair and make-up stylist. 

You didn’t think that, a year ago, calling this man out for looking at you for too long would lead you to going to a party that you a hundred percent didn’t fit in at. “You like the dress?” Bucky asked when he had picked you up.

“Yeah, it’s nice I guess.” You couldn’t hold the joke for long. It was a beautiful dress, and you thanked him for it genuinely. 

Through the night when you and Bucky did your same bantering, which made the night even better. 

A few days later Bucky walked into the club getting a drink. Most of the other bar tenders wouldn’t serve him because they knew he came for you, but another worker came up tonight. “Is she not in tonight?” He asked with furrowed brows, maybe he didn’t see it right when looking at the schedule. 

“She never came in Mr. Barnes.” The worker answered. 

That morning you had taken a shower right when you got up, then what to eat cereal, while watching T.V. when a knock sounded at your door your brows furrowed, when you opened it a man who had short dark brown hair and dark almost black eyes was on the other side. “Hi.” He smiled before my mouth and nose had a cloth over both of them, and the world went black. 

Your head lulled to the side, your eyes opened, you were met with a pitch black room. You tugged your arms, finding them tied down to a chair. “Y/n Y/l/n.” The lights flicked on, and you saw the same man, you didn’t understand how he knew your name. “I can tell that you're confused. I’m Brock, and how I know you, I saw you at that lovely party the other night, with Barnes.”

“Look I and Mr. Barnes aren’t close, we argue and he just asked me to go to that party, we’re not really friends.” You scoffed, looking at the man. 

“Hmm, are you sure that's how he feels, because what I saw with him that night wasn’t just someone he argues with.” He told you. Did Bucky actually find you attractive? Were you attracted to Bucky? Oh god you are, you are actually in love with him. “Exactly.” Brock laughed. 

Immediately after hearing you hadn’t gone in at all at work that day Bucky knew you were in danger, he headed to your apartment, he got out of his car, he got into the elevator and called the man on watch for that morning, he had stationed people outside your apartment.  “Did you see anything suspicious?” Bucky asked the man. 

“No, sir I didn’t, I didn’t get there till nine because of an emergency that I got caught up on.” The man rushed out, which meant that there was a three hour gap for you to have been grabbed. 

Bucky hung up and threw his phone at the wall in anger, he headed to the apartment that was yours, he knocked but there had been no reply, so he tried the knob, where the door opened, he walked in, looking in each room. “Fuck!” Bucky yelled, he went to the counter to calm himself down, when there was a note. ‘Docs tonight come alone, I know what she means to you - Brock’ Bucky cumbled the paper, he sped to his house to collect as many men he could, he couldn’t let anything happen to you. 

“Buck, are you sure about all of this for her?” Steve asked. 

Bucky looked at his closest friend. “Yes I am Steve, I don’t think you can understand how I feel for her.”

“Then let's get her.” Steve said before getting into a large SUV that Bucky would drive so as to make it seem he was alone, they took secret roads to the docs, his car the only one with headlights so it looked like it was only him. 

He got out as did Rumlow, pulling you along with him, from afar Bucky could tell Rumlow had beat the shit out of you, to put it bluntly. “Pretty dapper for a meeting that could end my life.” You smirk saying as you would have if you were at the bar right now, it sounded slightly slurred and less confident, Bucky could tell Rumlow gave you something. 

Bucky kept his cool calculating demeanor, but said. “You look like shit.” That made you laugh a lot. “What the hell did you give her, Rumlow.”

“It won't kill her, it just makes her loopy, it is however just below an overdose point.” He explained. 

“What do you want?” Bucky asked from afar. 

“What you have, all of it, your business, houses, hell even your money all of it for her.” Brock had a lengthy ransom, but if Bucky had come alone he would have done it for you, giving Brock every last cent he had in his wallet, to the man just for you. 

“Where are the papers?” Bucky asked. 

“Right this way.” Brock pointed to a small shack, Bucky was about to walk but Brock stopped to talk to you. “Barnes, you get her after.”

Bucky nodded, Brock seemed to have come alone, Bucky looked in the direction of his car, and nodded. 

When Brock and Bucky walked in the shack you stood by the car, waiting, as you did the blond man walked up along with multiple others, but just as they appeared so did Brocks. “Fuck.” Steve hissed, grabbing you and running to the SUV. 

“What about Bucky?” You asked. 

“He’ll be fine.” Steve sighed as he sped away.

Brock smirked when he heard the guns start going off. “I see we both didn’t keep our promises.” 

“Yeah, your laughable Rumlow.” Bucky hissed, as he pulled out his gun.

You walked around the living room of Bucky’s house, while a movie played, whatever Brock gave you made you just want to move so you just paced around. Soon the door opened, you looked and found Bucky. “Thank god.” He sighed in relief, he walked up and hugged you. 

“If this is what it takes for us to admit we have feelings for each other, what's it going to be like when we get married?” You smirked. Bucky laughed, shaking his head.