#i hope my reply is alri!
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captainsophiestark · 1 year ago
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Bad Timing
Benedict Bridgerton x Reader
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Written for Fictober 2023!
Fandom: Bridgerton
Day 25 Prompt: "Do I look like I knew that?"
Summary: When Eloise needs help with a problem, she knows she can count on her brother and his new wife for help.
Word Count: 1,047
Category: Fluff, Humor
Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.
"You know, lazy days like this are by far my favorite," I mused, curling into my husband's side as we laid in bed together. "No galas, no gossip from the Ton. Just the two of us."
"I certainly have to agree," said Benedict, my husband, as he traced patterns on the bare skin of my back. "Although, I do enjoy watching Colin wade through the swarm of Mamas every time we go out, now that he is the only unwed Bridgerton son. At least until Gregory gets a bit older."
"I'd say you were being mean, but he did ditch you and Anthony for quite a while in his travels."
"Yes, he did. So he deserves this."
I laughed, shaking my head a bit at my husband's antics. A moment later, he pulled me tighter to his side, rolling us so I laid completely on top of his chest. I rose up on my elbows to meet his eyes and found him looking at me with a mischevious smile.
"You know, it's just occurred to me," he started. "There are quite a few ways I can think of that our time would be better spent than talking about my brother."
"Oh really?" I asked, grinning and leaning down closer to Benedict. "And what might those ideas be?"
"Well for starters..."
With that, he brought his hand up to the back of my neck and pulled me into a searing kiss. I rested all my weight on him, kissing right back, until a knock at the door jarred us both out of the moment.
Reluctantly, I pulled away, and Benedict let me. We shared a look.
"Maybe whoever it is will go away if we ignore them," he whispered in suggestion. As if he'd willed it into happening, a voice from the other side of the door called out.
"Y/N! If you're in there, please, I need to talk to you."
Eloise. Benedict's little sister, who I'd become close with throughout the course of Benedict courting me. I gave Benedict an apologetic look.
"No," he whined as I rolled off of him, quickly wrapping a robe around myself and heading for the door.
"I have to," I replied. "I can't ignore her. Make yourself decent."
With that, I turned from my husband and went to open the door just wide enough to see Eloise on the other side, and for her to see me.
"Oh, thank goodness!" she cried, moving to push past me and into the room. I let her, just hoping that Benedict had done as I'd said. Eloise and I had done this a few times as we'd gotten closer, and whenever it happened, I knew she really, truly needed me.
I turned around to follow Eloise back into the room after shutting the door behind me, only to find her frozen just a few steps from where she'd come in. Benedict stood next to the bed, looking tired but resigned to our new morning activity as he laced up his shirt.
"Good morning, Eloise," he said, a little edge of teasing in his tone. "You know, I was trying to enjoy the morning with my wife-"
"Do I look like I knew that?" she cried. I fought back a laugh as I walked forward to wrap my arm around her shoulder.
"It's alright, Eloise," I said. "Benedict and I were about to get up for the morning, anyway."
Benedict shot me a look with his eyebrows almost into his hairline, and I glared right back, imploring him to go along with me. He cleared his throat.
"Right. That we were. What did you need help with, sister?"
She hesitated, so I walked around to face her, putting both of my hands on her shoulders and blocking her eyeline to Benedict. I gave her a small smile, so she'd know everything was alright, then spoke in a low voice that I knew Benedict wouldn't be able to hear.
"If this is a ladies' problem, or one you don't want your brother to know about, El, I'll throw him out of here right now and we can talk, alright? But if you're embarrassed about knocking when you did, then you truly don't need to be. We love you, and we'd both drop far more important things to help you whenever you need it."
Eloise sighed, nodding a little as she did. The bright red blush that had risen to her cheeks started to fade, and she at last met my eyes again.
"Thank you. I... suppose it wouldn't hurt to have Benedict's input as well," she said. I nodded, giving her a bright smile before turning around to face my husband.
"Put your problem-solving hat on, Benedict," I said. I started drifting for the couches by Benedict's turret window, one of my favorite features of his room. "We've got a family matter to deal with."
They both beamed at me as they started following me over to the couch. I'd considered a few of Benedict's siblings as good as family for a long time now, but it felt amazing to be able to say that and have it be completely true.
Benedict and Eloise settled into the couch on either side of me, Benedict resting his arm across my shoulders. Those kinds of casual touches would've been scandalous before we were married, but now we could do them whenever we wanted to, which also made my heart sing.
Eloise gave us both one last look with a raised eyebrow, then launched into her explanation of the problem that had brought her to our doorstep, which had something to do with a boy of virtually no social status who'd caught her attention. Benedict and I spent the rest of the morning, helping her as best we could, in the way only we could.
Although I hated that Eloise had to deal with the problems she dealt with, a small part of me sang the entire morning as Benedict and I worked together, the perfect team, to help his little sister. This was going to be the rest of our lives, with Eloise and maybe someday with children of our own, and I couldn't be happier thinking about that future with Benedict. We made the perfect team.
****************
Everything Taglist: @rosecentury
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moonstruckme · 8 months ago
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Hiya Mae!! How are you?? It’s been a little bit but I was hoping I could request a poly!marauders fic (+plus Lily if you’re comfortable with doing that if not it’s fine). This week is the 6th anniversary of my brothers passing and this year is a bit harder as I’m turning 18. Having such a milestone coming up and him not being here is sorta making me sick. I was wondering if maybe you could base the fic off of that? Or something to do with grief and them helping reader out. I’ve found great comfort in the abundance of love you portray with their relationship and I could do with a lil of it.
If not it’s totally fine don’t feel obligated. Hope you have a good week!!
Hi sweetheart, sorry I couldn't get this to you during the week you requested it. I was also dealing with a bit of grief at the time and it felt too raw to try for a while. I hope you're doing well and that you really enjoy being 18, even if those feelings are complicated by your loss <33
cw: mentions of death, grief
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 622 words
The sky is turning from deep blue to black outside when Sirus notices you’ve slipped into a melancholy. 
The only hint of it is in your tone. You’ve been quipping about the film you’re all watching like you always do, bouncing off his and James’ comments and Remus’ amused grunts, but there’s a falsity to the cheer in your voice. This is something you and James have in common; when Sirius or Remus are upset it permeates the area around them like a thick fog, but the two of you have a way of keeping it contained within yourselves, putting on counterfeit smiles. Sirius often wonders if it doesn’t hurt you more. 
He leans away from where he’s been resting his head on Remus’ pectoral, snaking an arm around your shoulders. 
“Penny for your thoughts, pretty girl?” he asks quietly. 
You shrug. Swallow. “Just thinking about them,” you murmur in reply. 
Sirius suspects this isn’t the full story, but he, too, knows the necessity of papering over certain pains. He doesn’t pry. 
Before the war—before Regulus—Sirius used to think that grief was the pain that came from the love you had for the lost person being ripped away from you. But even months after his brother’s death, all the love is still there. It’s amplified, if anything, every ounce of it demanding attention now that he can no longer take it for granted even a little bit. 
What went was the ritual of it all. The peculiar brand of happiness he’d felt around Reg, never easy but still there, buried beneath layers of troubled history and shared broodiness. The inside jokes they’d barely realized they had, things no one who wasn’t raised in their house would see the humor in. The surety that if they fought, they’d get a chance to make up. Sirius will never have those things with his brother again. In memories, maybe, but now they’ll always be tinged with the love so big it hurts. 
He wishes desperately he could keep you from hurting like that. 
He shuffles closer, awkwardly wrapping his other arm around you until he’s nearly covering your body with his. It’s like he thinks he can shield you, like he can protect you from grief after he’d failed to protect you from loss. 
“I’m sorry,” Sirius says. 
You shake your head, turning so it’s jammed in the juncture of his neck and shoulder. Your face feels hot. “I don’t know what to do,” you choke out. 
Sirius squeezes you tighter. He gets it, but he doesn’t. He knows how it feels to grieve, but not how to grieve your person in your way. It’s an ache he can only approximate. 
“Sweetheart.” James’ voice sounds pained, and he gets up from Remus’ other side, rounding the couch to climb onto the armrest beside you. He rubs your back with one hand, the other coming to rest on Sirius shoulder, a comfort in case he needs it. “I don’t think there’s anything you can do, my love.” 
Sirius feels a hot tear slip down his neck into his shirt, and James winces as your shoulders hitch under his touch. Remus makes a soft pitying sound. 
“You’re alright.” He latches onto the last unclaimed part of you, rough hand soothing up your calf. “You’re okay.” 
“Sorry,” you manage, and Sirius squishes you punishingly in his arms, pressing a staunch kiss to the side of your head. 
“Don’t be silly,” he tells you. James makes a half-choked sound of agreement. “No sorries, okay?” 
You nod, the bump of your nose moving against Sirius’ neck. He gives you another kiss to show his approval. 
“You’re alright, darling,” Remus says again. “Take all the time you need. We’ve got you.” 
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themultifandomgal · 1 year ago
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Arthur Shelby- F Off Linda
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Trigger warning- sexual assault (mentioned), Linda being a bitch, talk about religion and the usual peaky blinders stuff.
At the start of mine and Arthur's relationship, if we can even all it that, it was just sex. My parents both passed away when I was 16 and I had to do anything to look after my younger siblings. At first it was stealing then it was sex work. I first met Arthur when I was 20, him 12 year older. A few months into seeing him, he asked me to only see him if he payed me more. Feelings developed between us both and when we started officially seeing each other Tommy offered me a job at the betting shop, promised to keep me and my sisters safe.
It's been 5 years now and Arthur and I are to be married in the next few months, well I hope. At Tommy and Graces wedding a woman named Linda approached Arthur and has wormed her way into our lives somehow. After the death of Grace, Tommy started dating Lizzie, who also used to be a sex worker.
We're sat in the Garrison having a meeting, Lizzie and I sit next to one another, Arthur next to me. The door opens and in walks Linda
"What's she doing here?" I look from her to Tommy
"We need her help"
"I don't fucking care. Thought it was only family in these meetings"
"Like I said YN we need her help" I huff crossing my arms over my chest at Tommy "Linda sit" Linda chooses to sit next to Arthur, earning a death stare from me
"So how's Linda going to help Tom? Pray Father Hughes away? Pray that what happened to Micheal didn't happen? Because Tommy, if you want Father Hughes dead there's no way in hell" Linda coughs not liking what I'm saying "Tom there's no way hell she will let that happen"
"Thank you for your input YN" Tommy sighs obviously irritated
"Tommy you've known me for 5 years. You've known her what? A year? She will fuck us all over"
"YN, love why don't we go and get a drink?" Arthur says looking at me
"You know you shouldn't drink so much" Linda says
"Linda, for me to stay sane I need to be drunk" I reply
"Arthur take YN to the bar. Calm her down before she shoots Linda in the head"
"Come on love" Arthur pulls me up and we leave our privet room and go to the bar
"I hate her"
"I know, but if Tommy says she can help we have to trust him"
Once having a drink and feeling a little calmer we head back into the snug and sit down in our original seats
"Any calmer YN?" John asks but I just glare at him
"I've just told Linda what she will be doing. YN, Lizzie I want you to ask your old friends if they know anything we could use against him"
"Old friends" Linda scoffs
"Problem Linda?" Lizzie asks
"They weren't your friends" Linda laughs "I'm surprised neither of you have the clap or have a secret child" I ball my hands up trying to not literally kill this woman "I mean you were whores once upon a time. You both had sex before marriage, Arthur doesn't that bother you?"
"No" Arthur shrugs
"YN you were a child when...."
"When I had to sell my body to keep myself and my sisters alive!" I've had enough. I jump out of my chair shouting "to keep them out of the fucking orphanage, off the fucking streets. Yes and if I had to do it again for them I would"
"Well what's your excuse" she asks Lizzie
"None of your fucking business" she replies
"Tommy if she doesn't leave right now, I won't be responsible for my actions"
"Ok, ok Linda leave"
"What?"
"You heard him go" Polly now says
"Why me? She's basically threatened me" Linda points at me
"She is family" Polly "you however..."
"But..."
"Oh just fuck off Linda. No one here actually likes you"
"Fine, but don't come crying to me when you realise that your going to hell"
"Think I'll be ok" I breathe a sigh of relief once she leaves "thank fuck for that"
That evening after Arthur and I have gone home we sit down for some food at the table. Annoyingly what Linda said got to me a little. Does Arthur actually care about my past, that he has to leave with my younger sisters
"Are you alright?" Arthur asks me
"What Linda said earlier about my past. That doesn't bother you does it?"
"Why would it? I was a part of that. I love you, I want to marry you. Fuck what Linda says"
"I know. Sorry. She just gets under my skin"
"You can't let her. Once Tommy has used her for what he needs she'll be gone"
"Hope so"
"YN, Arthur we're home" my sisters call out after we hear the door open then close
"Ok, there's food in the kitchen"
"Thanks"
"Your a good sister. You know that don't you?"
"I've tried my best"
"You'll be a good mother one day as well"
"One day?"
"Mmm maybe after we're we marry?"
"Maybe" I give Arthur a smile knowing that we most likely will have a baby once we get married.
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treehousesinfrance · 2 years ago
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Love Leaves Traces - Chapter 9
“Hey Rem, can we tal-”
“Can we do it later? I’m kind of busy right now, Pads.”
Even being dismissive and infuriating, he was attractive. Needless to say, Sirius was not doing very well on the whole talking-to-Remus front. In his defence, his friend was not making it easy. It was somehow worse than before, because he wasn’t even pretending there was anything wrong, just flat out refusing to speak to Sirius about anything other than their friends or class work. 
He was convinced that Remus liked him back however. The way he caught his eye unintentionally or the tips of his ears went red when Sirius ran a hand through his hair. Or spoke French. Or walked into a room. 
So, if he wasn’t going to talk, Sirius was going to make his life utter hell. 
He had perfected the art of eyeliner, styled his hair so it was soft and wavy and smelling of jasmine and vanilla and threw on one of Remus’ sweaters and waltzed into the dorm room wearing literally nothing else. Of course, the sweater was long enough to cover anything unsavoury but the imagination is a beautiful thing, and Remus was known for having a very, very good imagination. 
He bent over to rifle through one of the drawers in his cupboard under the pretence of sock hunting, certain that he had Remus’ undivided attention. Upon turning around, he found that he was correct.
Mouth agape and eyes unfocused, Remus sat perched on his bed, his book sliding precariously close to the edge.
“What book you reading there, Moons?” He said in what he hoped was a seductive tone. 
“Um–” His voice came out hoarse and Sirius could have punched the air. “Uh– ahem, ah it’s Wuthering Heights . Your copy actually. —erm. I didn’t mean to, it’s just that… Is that alri–”
“Oh that's perfectly fine, Remus. Splendid, actually.”
Remus was nodding, staring directly at the ceiling in defiance of the half naked friend in front of him. Sirius had annotated that book meticulously, and as he grew more aware of his feelings, those annotations became heavily centred around Remus. Around loving Remus. He couldn’t ignore him once he’d seen what Sirius had written so plainly.
Splendid, indeed.
“Urgh! Why can’t I get this right?”
Remus tried the spell again. He was supposed to be turning a goblet into a rat, but was only successful in making it grow fur. Peter, thankfully, was absent.
“You’ve got the wand movement wrong. Here–” Sirius reached around Remus, grasping his hand over his wand and rested his head onto his shoulder so he could whisper to him, “Yes. That’s perfect. You’re doing so good, Rem. Just like that.”
The shudder he felt was worth any weird look he revived from James. 
“That’s my boy. So so good” He let his lips brush against the back of his neck.
Remus’ goblet set fire. 
Sirius was in the process of thoroughly cleaning each of his fingers with his tongue, sucking on each diligently, delighting in the way Remus would jump a little in his seat each time Sirius released a finger with a soft pop. It was a blatant display. Some girls from the Gryffindor table were staring unashamedly at him, but he didn’t care. He was only watching Remus whose gaze had gone glassy and lips red from how hard he was biting.
“Merde, Sirius. Les choses que tu me fais…”
Fuck, he was so hot.
“Oh, Remus. Les choses que je pourrais te faire si tu me laissais faire.”
Sirius very much enjoyed flirting with Remus. It was going exactly as he’d hoped. Remus was getting more flustered by the day and Sirius no longer had to hold back on doing all the things he wanted to do around Remus, but even so, he missed him. 
Unless they were flirting, their conversations were still short and forced and Sirius wanted to punch a wall.
Remus. Please will you talk to me? After class?
Sirius levitated the note carefully onto Remus’ desk while Professor McGonnigal was turned. Remus vanished the note after a glance, not bothering to reply.
Remus. Please. I miss you.
Nothing.
Okay fine. I can’t stop thinking about you and that kiss. I know you want to ignore it but I want you and I think you want me too. I don’t really know what it means but can we just work this out together? Whatever I did I’m sorry but please. Just put me out of my misery.
It was brazen, but he was running out of patience. If Remus didn’t know how he felt, then Sirius would make damn sure he was aware that Sirius liked him, in a not so platonic way.
��Passing notes in my class?” McGonnigal snatched the note out of the air before it reached its destination. Sirius’ stomach dropped. Shit shit shit.
“What’s to stop me from reading this out? Hmm?”
“Professor please, it was me. I swear I’ll never do it again. I– I’ll be the best student. I–”
“Mr. Black, please take your seat.” He had apparently stood up unconsciously and sank down slowly, taking in his professor’s pinched expression as her eyes flicked over the note. 
“5 points from Gryffindor” She tucked it away in a drawer at her desk. Sirius felt like he was going to pass out, like there was no blood in his head. For the rest of the class, the voices around him were cloudy and muffled and his hand was clenched painfully around his chair. He hardly noticed when James tugged on his arm. Class was over.
James’ eyes were full of concern. 
“Sirius, what’s happening?” It sounded far away. “Sirius, what was on the note? Are you okay?”
“It’s fine. I’m fine. Promise. I just gotta um sit down” He planted himself on the side of the hallway, grasping at the walls, the floor, something to hold onto.
“What’s happening to him?”
“I don’t know. Was he hexed?”
“I don’t think so.”
“He’s freaking out”
“I think he’s having a panic attack.”
“A what?”
Remus reached out, took Sirius' hand and let him squeeze .
“Sirius, you’re okay, yeah? You’re safe. Just breathe with me. Nice and slow. In. Out. That’s good” 
Remus' gaze was steady and focused, the weight of his hand grounding him. In. Out. In. Out. His eyes were brown with specs of blue and a dark ring around the iris. In. Out. His hair was brown with streaks of gold. Soft looking. Perfect. In. Out. He smelled like peaches.
In. Out. 
He came back to himself, overly aware of the students bustling around him, leaving their final class of the day. 
“Sorry. I don’t know what happened.” He ran a hand through his hair. Having an emotional breakdown in the middle of a hallway was not going to make him look good to Remus. 
“You don’t have to apologise.” Why was he being so nice? “Has that happened before?”
Sirius thought back to the bathroom, his room at home, the hospital wing, his Mother, Crucio. “Once or twice”
“Sirius…” Remus pulled him into a hug, squeezing him tightly. He was mortified when he let out a little sob. Remus was running his hands through his hair and he couldn’t help but relax into the embrace. 
James and Peter were standing to the side a little awkwardly. Peter was glaring at anybody who slowed to get a better look and James was ringing his hands, obviously wanting to talk to Sirius but not wanting to let anyone else know his secret. 
Remus muttered over his shoulder reassurances. 
“You’re okay. You’re safe. We love you” and then, “I love you”
He was okay. He was safe. Remus loved him.
Remus loved him. 
After that, things changed. They still weren’t talking about it – Sirius took McGonnigal’s intervention as a sign to let it rest – but Remus wasn’t being as dismissive of him. Embarrassed over the moment in the hallway, he decided to spend more time in his animagus form, where his emotions were less consuming and he could smell Remus on almost every surface of the dorm. 
It was a Saturday when it happened. 
James was at the library being tutored by Lily and Peter was on a date with Bea, so Sirius and Remus had taken up residence in the common room. 
“What the fuck is this?”
“Hm?” Sirius didn’t look up from his book. It was one of the ones Lily bought him.
“When did you put this in here? Is this some kind of joke?” 
The distress in his voice snapped Sirius alert. Remus had Wuthering Heights open, eyes wide in shock. 
“You’ve been flirting with me all week”, he said, “I’ve been trying to– fuck” He dropped the book open onto the sofa and darted out of the common room. 
It was open to a page Sirius remembered, ‘Rem <3’ written carefully in the margin. It was the same one Remus had seen him write all those weeks ago in the dorm. 
He took off running after him, through the castle and out the front gates. It was raining. Of course it was raining. 
He found Remus in a clearing near the lake. He looked frantic, his hair wet and clinging to his face, his breath coming in pants.
“What are you trying to do here, Sirius?”
This was fucking ridiculous. “What am I trying to do!? I think I’ve made it pretty fucking obvious, Rem!”
It was pelting down now. 
“Sirius, you’re killing me. I like you. You know this. Why are you torturing me?”
“You like me?”
“OF FUCKING COURSE I LIKE YOU, YOU IDIOT”
“THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU DO ANYTHING”
“BECAUSE WE AGREED THAT IT WAS A MISTAKE!”
What?
“I AGREED TO NO SUCH THING, REMUS LUPIN. YOU ARE THE BEST THING THAT’S EVER HAPPENED TO ME! I COULD NEVER REGRET YOU!”
“THEN WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING AT ME?”
“I DON’T KNOW!”
They crashed together. Lips and teeth and tongue. Remus was pulling at his robes, tugging his hair, his hands were everywhere and he still wanted more. The rain was incessant on his skin until he reluctantly pulled away, cursing his body’s need to breathe.
Remus was staring at him, bewildered. His hair an utter mess, wet and spiky. His pupils were blown and his lips red and puffy. Sirius couldn’t believe his eyes. 
“But, in the cupboard, you said. You agreed it was a mistake, to forget it. I didn’t want to lose you. Your friendship. It means so much to me.”
Sirius placed a careful kiss on his lips. He couldn’t help himself.
“The only thing I could think about in that cupboard was how close you were standing to me. Bloody hell, Remus. Do you understand how gone I am for you?” He peppered kisses over his face, his neck. “You’re so perfect, it’s infuriating. Your face and your smile and your— fuck, your freckles and the way you sing , Remus, it’s fucking everything. You’re everything.”
“I’m not everything Sirius. I’m not even a whole person.”
“You’re everything. To me, you’re everything.”
“I don’t deserve you Sirius. You’re too good.”
“Everything”
“Sirius –”
He cut him off with another kiss. 
“Stop being a self deprecating tosser and let me love you”
Remus bit his lip in that way that Sirius loved and smiled and his ears did the thing that Sirius loved. 
“Yeah, okay.”
They kissed until the rain cleared, and then a little while longer until they were frozen to their bones and in desperate need of the warmth of the Gryffindor fire. 
They walked in silence, their hands brushing occasionally, the touch electric. Sirius would never get sick of this. 
“Sirius. I have a question and don’t laugh.”
“I promise I won’t laugh”
“Will you be my boyfriend?”
Sirius could explode. This is the happiest he had ever felt. If he ever needed a patronus, this is the memory he would use. 
“Fuck yes”
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shiftingparadise · 2 years ago
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Levi x Reader: Please don't scare me like that
Hi guys! I'm sorry this isn't one of your requests, but I needed to go to the hospital last night because I'm sick and this just popped into my head today.
Hope you guys enjoy it!🤍
Word count: 1789
‘Eat this’. ‘No’, you barely managed to reply, pushing the spoon away from your face. ‘You got to eat, it’s been days’. ‘Smell makes me want to throw up’. 
It hurts. Speaking, breathing, … Everything hurts. Yes, your body needed food, some kind of fuel, but it rejected it every time. 
Levi lowered his head, his stomach clenching with concern. This wasn’t normal, you never got sick, not like this anyway. Sure, a cold, some type of flu, but not like this. A freezing hand met your forehead, your eyes tearing up at the feeling. ‘It’s not going down’, a disappointed tone in his voice. 
Sorry. That’s all you could think of, ‘sorry’. 
‘Shit’, his eyes flew open when he noticed your hands searching for the bucket, ‘T-try to breath, okay? It’s going to be alri-‘. 
Awful, the sounds coming from your throat sounded awful. After all, there was nothing left in your body to throw up.
‘That’s good, lay down for a bit, okay? Try to sleep, I’ll be here’. Again, the cold touch of his hand met your searing flesh, his thumb slowly drawing circles. 
Levi can’t stand this, he just can’t stand to see you in so much pain. ‘I would switch places within a second’, that’s all he can think about. 
Your breathing slowed down, giving a chance for Levi to study every part of your body. You got so thin, your once glowing skin now grey and dull. ‘Blood?’, his brows drew together, ‘This can’t be good’. Levi gently wiped the blood away from the corner of your mouth, using an old cloth. 
Great. It only got worse. You needed to go to a hospital, but he would never get you to agree. 
‘Y/N’, his eyes burned when he felt your grip loosen around his hand, ‘Y/N?’. 
No response. You’d been zoning in and out of consciousness for the past couple of days, it’s not like this should concern him anymore… but it did. Especially when he looked into the bucket. 
‘Hange?’, Levi hastily stood up, calling out for his friend's name. ‘Hange?’, louder this time. ‘She’s in her office, can I get you, something Captain?’, the door carefully opened. ‘I’m taking her to a hospital in the city, get Hange, I need her with me. Tell her it’s an emergency’. ‘S-squad leader?’, Jean’s eyes widened when he saw your frail body. 
The cadets couldn’t know. That’s what you made Levi promise, another thing that added to his sense of guilt. 
‘Jean, get Hange, and don’t tell anyone about this’, Levi’s breathing got heavier, his heart racing. He felt sick seeing you like this, his legs shaking with fear. ‘O-okay’, Jean collected himself, tearing his eyes away from his beloved squad leader. 
It seemed like forever before Hange arrived, but in reality, it was barely a minute or two. 
‘This isn’t good’, Hange quickly hurried over to you, her thumb now pressed on the thin vein on your wrist. ‘Get a carriage, I’ll get a cold towel’. 
Even Hange seemed concerned, he could see it in her eyes. She normally was the more rational one when it came to you, but seeing her panic like this… This wasn’t good.
‘Why?’, a question Levi asked himself countless times by now, ‘Why you?’. The stones underneath the carriage ensured a bumpy and rough ride, but you didn’t wake up, not once. ‘How far Hange?’, Levi tried to hold back tears, his digits stroking through your sweaty hair.
 ’10 minutes’. 
‘Come on, Y/N’, Levi looked at you, your head resting on his lap, ‘Can’t leave me like this’. 
He didn’t know which illness you were suffering from, but he knew it was bad. What if… What if you didn’t make it? What if you left him behind? To live a life without you? You were his life, his light. A life without you wasn’t worth to live. 
‘And?’, Hange quickly jumped off her horse. ‘Not good’, Levi’s eyes were wide open in shock, his whole pants covered in blood. 
It’s not the blood that scared him, because he had seen death more times than he could count, but it was the fear of being left behind, the fear that this was the last memory he got with you. 
‘Nurse!’ Hange ran inside, ‘Get her inside, Levi’. ‘O-okay’, Levi carefully picked you up, still surprised by how much lighter you felt. 
Hange had called out his name, but he couldn’t run with you in his arms, not when you were like this. What if he hurt you? No. Instead, he slowly walked inside, his eyes fixed on your once so cherry pink lips. 
‘H-help us, please’, Levi almost whispered, your weak body close to his chest, ‘Help us’. 
Levi fell to his knees, not caring that everyone saw him like this; so weak and vulnerable. The world around him didn’t matter, he didn’t see them, because his world was in his arms; withering like a delicate rose. 
‘Levi’, Hange hurried over to the two of you, ‘A nurse is coming, she’ll be okay’. 
Okay? Did she believe that herself? At this point, Levi was holding you tighter to his chest, as to keep you warm, safe. 
‘J-just help her’, his head rested against yours, silent sobs escaping his lungs, ‘I need her, Hange’. 
It wasn’t only Levi that needed you to be fine, Hange needed you too. You were her best friend, the one who always talked every doubt out of her. She loved you just as much as Levi did. 
‘H-here, get her on here Levi’, Hange hurried to the side when she saw the nurses appear with a bed, ready to save your life.
This couldn’t be real. Levi could feel the nurses pulling you away from him, Hange screaming his name, but how? How did this happen? He couldn’t answer or move. The only thing he could do was wait for you to be fine, to return to him. 
---
‘She got some antibiotics and some fluid. She suffered from gastric bleeding which caused her to throw up blood, this in turn was caused by a really bad stomach infection. It seemed a nasty virus caused her to feel like this’. 
‘S-so she’ll be fine?’, Levi was sitting next to you, his eyes fixated on the fluid that entered your body. ‘She’ll be fine, she just needs a lot of rest’. 
Levi didn’t hear what the doctor had to say to Hange anymore, he had heard the most important thing. You were going to be fine. 
---
‘W-where am I?’, you slowly opened your eyes, brain as foggy as ever. 
‘Y/N?’. 
Two days. It had been two days since you last woke up. Hange brought Levi food and some clean clothes now and then, forcing him to eat, but other than that… He never left your side. 
‘Levi?’, you tried to sit up straight, but your body wouldn’t let you just yet. ‘S-stay still kid, y-you need to rest’, shaking hands covered your body with sheets again. ‘Levi, what happened? W-why are you crying?’. ‘Thought I’d lost you’. 
Shattered. Your heart shattered at the sight of him. The bags underneath his crescent-shaped eyes darker than usual, his red-stained eyes…
‘You’re not getting rid of me that easily’, you forced a smile, ‘I told you I’d stay by you, no matter what’. ‘Hm’, Levi grabbed your hand with his shaking ones, placing a soft kiss on it, ‘You promised me’. 
‘Y/N!’, Hange’s sweet voice echoed through the room, ‘You’re finally awake’. ‘Careful’, Levi looked at his friend when he noticed she wanted to hug you. ‘Yeah yeah’, she waved his words away, ‘Tell me, how are you feeling? The doctor said you should be fine within a week’. ‘What’s even wrong with me?’, you frowned when you looked around the room, ‘I’m in a hospital? How long have I been out?’. 
You carefully listened to Hange, trying to keep your focus. 
‘Jean saw me?’, you sighed, head falling back into your pillow, ‘I can’t have the cadets see me like this’. 
‘A-about that…’, Hange nervously chuckled, her hand stroking over the back of her head. 
‘Surprise!’.
Suddenly, all of your cadets barged through the door. Causing Levi to sigh while giving Hange his ‘mad’ look. 
‘Y/N! Are you fine? We were worried sick about you!’, Sasha jumped on the bed. ‘We really were. Why didn’t you tell us?’, Eren almost yelled at you. 
Even if you wanted, you couldn’t keep up with all the questions they had, or with their concerns for your health. 
‘Sorry’, Hange nervously chuckled when she saw Levi’s death stare, ‘Thought she wouldn’t mind seeing them’. ‘Tsk’, Levi slowly stood up, ‘Okay, everyone out. I’ll give you 5 seconds, she needs to rest’. ‘N-no it’s fine’, you hastily replied, ‘They can stay a little longer’. 
‘Captain’s right’, Armin smiled, ‘We’ll come back tomorrow’. ‘I’m leaving too’, Hange yawned, ‘It’s getting late’. 
You said your goodbyes, enjoying the view of the flowers everyone brought. It brought a little light to the boring room you were staying in. 
‘What about you?’, you looked at Levi, who was placing the flowers on your nightstand. ‘I’m staying, like always’. ‘Wouldn’t it be better if you can get some proper rest in your be-‘. 
‘I’m staying Y/N’, his crescent-shaped eyes fixated on one of the roses, ‘I can’t sleep if you’re not with me’. 
A complicated, yet so simple man. He had certain feelings that he kept to himself, but his actions always spoke louder than his words. 
‘Fine’, you grunted while making some room. ‘Would it matter if I said no?’. ‘No’, you stubbornly replied, ‘I won’t let you sleep on that chair’. ‘Fine’, Levi sighed before carefully laying down next to you. 
He missed this. Your stubbornness, your playful character… Just as he missed your scent or the warmth of your body against his. 
‘I love you’, you whispered while nestling your head further into his chest. ‘Try to get some sleep, okay?’, he gently stroked through your hair, ‘You need to get some rest’. 
He didn’t say it back, he never did, but you knew he loved you. You knew he loved you more than anything, even without him saying it. Minutes passed, and your breathing got heavier, your eyes growing more tired. 
‘I love you’, a whisper that forced a smile on your face. You pretended you were asleep though because you knew he thought you were. After all, you knew him, how much effort it cost him to say something like that. 
‘Goodnight kid’, a gentle kiss on the top of your head, ‘Please don’t scare me like that again’.
741 notes · View notes
parkers-gal · 4 years ago
Text
through the tears T.H.
warnings : child birth, cursing
summary : reader goes into labor, and the grandparents meet the baby !! (requested)
word count : 1800
i wrote this like months ago lmao but enjoy
Any day now, you had told yourself. Any day. Of course, you were nervous, and quite frankly kind of terrified of the baby Holland coming. Weeks into your third trimester, you and Tom couldn't be anymore prepared, and the preparation of the baby coming made you forget that she was actually coming.
You were watering the plants on the shelf in the living room. You were due any day now, and you were as ready as you could be. Maneuvering around some leaves, you started to pull the pot a little closer for easier access, but then you felt something leaking down your leg. Looking down you realized your water had broken.
Oh shit, here we go.
And then, Tom came in, a phone in one hand and a notepad in the other.
"Hey, love. Do you think we should go with the first model or th-"
But when he glanced up to look at you, you were slowly turning around, eyes wide and jaw slack.
"Love? Are you alri-"
"My water just broke."
You were making your way to the car now. Tom was grabbing the emergency bags, for you and the baby, making sure his wallet and phone were with him before he started the engine.
"Try to stay calm. Remember the breathing exercises we learned? In and out, in and-"
You had groaned in pain at the first, very minor, contraction. Though it was one of the less painful ones, it was still an unfamiliar feeling, and you weren't used to it.
"Almost to the hospital, love."
"Thomas slow down! We might get pulled over or something!" You said, a small smile on your face, grinning through the pain.
When you arrived at the hospital, Tom jogged in to let them know of your situation, and two nurses came out, one with a wheel chair and the other with a clipboard. They were wheeling you in and keeping you updated, asking you very few questions before letting you know that your doctor was preparing for your labor.
"You're the husband?" She turned to Tom.
"That would be me," he said.
"The cervix is still opening at the moment, but once it's wide enough we can start the process. We won't know for certain how long this could take, but at this rate it'll probably start within the hour," she informed him.
Tom was wide eyed at the mention of the cervix opening, but he nodded nonetheless. Then, he was back by your right side. You were laying in the bed, legs spread as the hospital gown was covering most of you. You were sweating, panting, and reaching for Tom.
"I'm right here, love. How're you feeling? You're gonna do great, angel."
"I'm-" you took a breath. "I'm alright. Hurts like a bitch though."
He laughed at you before kissing your hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze. He leaned down to your ear to whisper a few words. "I'm gonna make a few calls. I'll be right back, angel." And then he kissed your shoulder and speed-walked out into the hallway.
He was ringing the landline to his parents, in hopes that word would spread and he would only have to make one call.
"Hey," Tom spoke first, testing the waters for who picked up.
"Hey, Tom? It's Harry. What's up?"
"Uhm, Y/N's water broke and we're at the hospital right now."
"Holy shit! What?" Harry screamed, excitement and nervousness evident in his tone. "Are yo-"
"Harry, you're gonna make me more nervous. Please, just tell mum & dad so they can get here. I need to go."
"Right yeah, of course."
"Thanks, bro."
"Anytime."
Tom sighed in relief, and he was about to hang up before Harry spoke up again.
"And, Tom?"
"Yeah?"
"Congrats, man."
Tom was starting to tear up. It wasn't everyday that him and his brothers had a heart-to-heart moment, and the realization of becoming a dad made it all the more emotional.
"Thanks, Harry. I'll see you soon, alright?"
"Yeah, man. We wouldn't miss it."
***
"Mum? Dad?" Harry called out, grabbing his phone and his wallet before heading in what he hoped was their direction.
"Yes?" Nikki answered, drinking tea from her mug as Dominic sat across from her.
"Y/N's going into labor. We need to go now."
The mug made a clattering noise from the small drop onto the table. It didn't break, but it sure did surprise both boys. And then, she was calling the rest of the Hollands and loading them into the car.
*** Harrison had arrived first, finding Tom's duffel bag on the floor in the hallway outside your room.
"Hey, Tom!" he said, walking in.
"Oh man -- hey, Haz."
They did a quick 'bear-hug' before making eye contact.
"You're about to be a dad."
"I know," Tom said, his voice more nervous than Harrison had ever heard.
"And you're gonna be great."
Once again, tears were welling up in Tom's eyes. But before he could continue the conversation any further, a nurse was coming up to Tom, almost disregarding Harrison's presence.
"Mr. Holland?" she asked.
"Yes?"
"Your wife is ready to go into labor, now."
The boys made brief eye contact, Harrison understanding, and he left the room to wait in the waiting-room chairs.
"Hey, love," Tom said, reaching for one of your hands, which you gladly gripped and squeezed.
"Thomas where the fuck have you been?" You whined, sweat coming out profusely and covering the entirety of your neck and face.
"I'm right here, darling. I'm not leaving, okay?"
"Get ready to push, Y/N," your doctor said from between your legs, interrupting your brief conversation with Tom.
Your husband had kissed your forehead, whispering encouraging words as you squeezed his hand for push number one.
"You're doing great love," Tom said, looking to the nurses for confirmation, to which one of them gave him a thumbs up. "I love you so much, Y/N. You're doing amazing. You're gonna push again, okay?"
You let out a loud groan, more like a cry and scream of pain and effort.
The doctor had felt your stomach over the hospital gown, mumbling something to the nurse beside her, before speaking up. "Last push, Y/N."
You groaned, attempting at one but failing.
"Just one more, love. Can you give me one more?" Tom said gently.
"I can't. I can't!" You cried, falling back onto the pillows.
"Just one more, baby. You're so close, and you've been doing great. Last one, darling. Okay? One more for me."
You nodded, hair sticking to the back of your neck as you squeezed his hand harder then ever. With a loud grunt, it was over, the baby successfully out as a nurse cut the umbilical cord. You fell back into the cushions as Tom went to look at his babygirl for the first time ever.
The nurse who was holding her smiled at Tom before letting him know they were going to wash up your baby.
Tom had taken a cold, damp towel and wiped your face. He got a new one to completely dry it off, before kissing your forehead and your hand. "Did so well, love. I love you so much."
"I love you, Tommy," You had managed to get out.
Less than ten minutes later, she was in your arms for the first time. Your gown was pretty low on your breasts, so the skin-to-skin was breathtaking. Tom was crying now, looking at his two girls and thanking whichever gods gave him you.
And then you were handing the baby over to Tom. Tom held her gently, like she was the most fragile being in the world.
He gasped through his tears. "Just like her mum."
"She's got your eyes, Tommy."
"Nonsense, darling."
You had breathed out a laugh, looking at Tom and your baby before letting one last tear fall.
"God I love you so much," you said.
"I love you. Both of you, so much," Tom had replied.
His phone had chimed in his pocket, and he was handing the baby back to you.
"What... what're we going to name her?" Tom asked timidly.
"Scarlet?" You said.
"After.. my grandmother?" Tom said, more tears forming.
"Yeah," You smiled softly.
"I like that," Tom said. "I like it a lot," he laughed through his tears. "Scarlet Leslie Holland?"
"Leslie," you repeated in a whisper. "Leslie," you whispered again. "Scarlet Leslie Holland."
"Yeah," Tom whispered back.
"I love it a lot."
Tom had kissed your forehead again before making his way into the hallway, where both sets of parents and siblings were waiting.
"Well?" Nikki said first, standing up as everyone else stood behind her.
"Do you want to meet her?"
*** The room was large, enough to fit everyone, thankfully. Upon entering, Nikki was first to catch a glance at you and her granddaughter, and the sight made her gasp, a hand to her mouth as tears formed quickly, falling just as fast.
"Oh, Tom. She's beautiful."
"They are, aren't they?" Tom said, standing on the other side of your bed as he watched his family's reaction.
"Do you want to hold her?" you asked, sitting up.
Nikki nodded, coming over and carefully taking the baby from you. She was in awe, cooing at the youngling while you whispered something to Tom about where your parents were.
"They said they'd give my family some time alone, first.. you know how your mum is: always the polite one," Tom whispered back.
You laughed before nodding. You turned back towards Nikki and the baby, silently watching them, as was Tom.
"Oh, Y/N," Nikki said. "She has your eyes."
"You see, love?" Tom said, smiling.
"She's so beautiful," Dominic confessed. "You two really... you two did really good."
"Thanks, dad," Tom said, a blush spreading on his cheeks.
"What's her name?" Paddy asked.
You glanced at Tom, smiling bashfully before replying. "Scarlet. Scarlet Leslie Holland."
"Scarlet," Nikki whispered, just as you had with Leslie.
While Nikki and Dominic were preoccupied with the baby, Harrison had made his way over to the two of you.
"Tom," Harrison said.
"Haz."
"You're a dad now," He said, his green orbs watering.
"Yeah," Tom said, laughing while stray tears fell.
"I'm so proud of you, man."
"Thank you, H."
"You know, Harrison," you cut in. "You're gonna be a pretty awesome godfather, don't you think?"
Tom looked down at you and smiled. He had let you choose who the godparents would be, and it warmed his heart to know you had chosen Harrison.
"Wait-" Harrison said. "You're serious?"
"Yeah," you said, laughing.
And then, the two boys were hugging and crying.
When they broke apart, Harrison spoke again. "I feel so lucky to have you three."
Each of Tom's brothers had a chance to hold the newborn, each one crying tears of joy and feeling immense pride in being apart of yours & Tom's journey.  
And then, Scarlet was back in your arms. You cradled her close to your chest, cherishing the feeling of her fresh skin against yours, the sweet smell of her new life starting, and you smiled through the tears.
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floralembarrassment · 2 years ago
Text
Summer in Paris (6/11) (jegulus)
James allows himself to be guided by Regulus, clearly familiar with the territory. He wonders if it is from his childhood or if he has actually been settling well into his new home. He isn't sure he ask that though. He is enjoying the warm sun in his face and how beautiful Regulus looks in the Parisian light. He holds him a little closer.
Regulus is pointing out something's along the way, James is trying to remember it all but is both distracted by the way Regulus speaks so fluently in both languages and that he can only truly understand half of what Regulus is saying to him. Finally, he cuts him off; "Regulus you are going to have to teach me what your words mean, because unlike you darling I still do not speak French!" He laughs and so does Regulus, who still had his mouth open mid-sentence, giving an affectionate smile and replying "Right."
Regulus leans in, gives him a kick kiss on the cheek. "What was that for? I mean do it again will ya, but what?" James asked a bit stunned. "I'm just happy you're here and happy you want to learn about my life. Shouldn't be but still am surprised that someone wants to understand even the little things." James wraps his arm around Regulus and pulls him in tight. "I like Paris you," he says and "of course I want to know everything you'll let me!"
"Okay, well I won't be teaching you French in one day or standing on the sidewalk, but we will practice alright?"
"Alri--" but just as he was about to grab Regulus' hand and start walking again, he quickly but he hoped secretly drew is wand, and he felt Regulus do the same.
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zackcollins · 3 years ago
Text
one number away || cavan biggio
masterlist
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Author's Note: Hi! I'm supposed to be writing a longer fic for a hockey player. But like. I wrote this instead as a way of giving myself something else to focus on so I didn't burn myself out on the other thing by focusing too hard on it. Ya know? Variety is good sometimes. Anyways! GIF credit to anotherhockeypage!
Warnings: There is a mention of a break-in/intruder with a gun. So, if you need to avoid that, that's okay. I have other fics for you to read. There's also mention of the reader whacking said intruder with a baseball bat if you need to avoid that too. And blood if that's something the squicks you. That should be it. Let me know if I missed something though. I'll add whatever I missed!!
Word Count: 2.0k+
Title: One Number Away by Luke Combs
Additional: The reader is gender-neutral! There isn't any appearance description (except mentioning that the intruder is the same stature and height as them. But I left it vague like that so anyone could imagine the intruder being the same build as them lol), but there is the use of the pronouns "they/them" to describe them. I hope that's alright! And I hope you all enjoy this! Let me know what you think because constructive criticism is always welcomed!
Tagging: @whimsical-daydreams
You were at home on a rather quiet night. The night almost seemed too quiet as you sat in front of your television and sipped idly on some coffee. You were watching a baseball game; the Washington Nationals were playing the Tampa Bay Rays. Though, you couldn’t focus on it because you felt anxious about something. Something felt like it was wrong but you couldn’t put your finger on what that was and it was bothering you too much to give your full attention to what was happening on your television screen.
Your cellphone ringing made you startle a little because of how on edge you were. When you saw that the caller ID belonged to your best friend, Cavan Biggio, you relaxed a little. It would be nice to hear his voice because talking to him always calmed your nerves. On top of that, you hadn’t talked for a few days. He had been away with his baseball team, the Toronto Blue Jays, on a west coast road trip; you couldn’t get the time difference to match up with your schedules.
"Cavan, hi!" You said cheerfully as soon as you answered the phone. "It's been a few days. How are yuh--"
"Someone broke in and they have a gun," Cavan replied, his voice quiet. You could tell that he had been crying because of how strained his voice sounded. "Please help. I'm terrified."
You felt muscles tense all over your body. You wouldn't know what to do with yourself if Cavan was shot and injured… or worse. If you were being honest with yourself, you had slowly fallen in love with Cavan from the time you became friends after meeting by chance after a game you attended in Buffalo a few years ago. And for him to call you while he was in this life-threatening situation… yeah. You didn't have time to process that. Cavan's life was in danger. You could handle it when he was safe.
"I'll be right over, hang tight. And don't try and be a hero," you responded before hanging up the phone.
You rushed around, grabbing a jacket, your shoes, and a baseball bat out of the closet since you didn't own a gun. You didn't know how well a baseball bat would hold up against an intruder with a gun but it was better than having only your bare hands.
The ten-minute drive to Cavan’s house was a blur. The next thing you remembered was seeing the windchimes above Cavan's front door swinging back and forth in the wind through the open doorway. You took a deep breath, grabbed the bat, and stepped out of your car.
You walked into the house as cautiously and as quietly as you could. You didn't want to alert the intruder that you were there, lest anything happen to you and have Cavan be put in even more danger. As you made your way around the house, you checked carefully in every room. You were trying to see if anyone was hiding out behind or under anything. There didn't seem to be anything out of the ordinary but you were only through the first floor of the house.
When you made it upstairs, you saw that the door to Cavan's bedroom was open. You also saw a shadowy figure standing in the doorway. You tiptoed across the floor, not wanting to alert whoever it was to your presence.
When you got to the door, you saw that the shadow belonged to someone of about your stature and height. They were pointing a gun at Cavan. Cavan was cowering on the bed with his hands up in a defensive posture. He was also chanting "please don't hurt me" while tears streamed down his cheeks.
Without warning, you swung the bat and hit the person with the gun in the side of the head. They crumpled to the floor with a pained groan as they dropped the gun and clutched their head.
They tilted their head a little to look up at you and then flitted their eyes in Cavan's direction.
"Fuck…." The person on the floor groaned as they removed their hand from their head and looked at the blood. "I can see why he married you now."
You twirled the bat in your hands. Glancing over at Cavan, you saw him shake his head vigorously and give you a pleading expression. You nodded back, giving Cavan a compassionate smile.
You took the bat and pointed it out into the hallway. "If you leave right now," you looked menacingly at the person. They were now sitting up so you took the bat and put it under their chin to make them focus on you, "we won't call the police. It's also not our problem how you explain the head wound. You broke into our house and pointed a gun at my husband. I protected him. You can come up with whatever excuse you want, coward."
“Alright, alright,” the person sighed as they got to their feet. They grabbed their gun and tucked it into their waistband before putting their shirt over the top of it. “I’ll get out of your hair.” They dabbed their head with their hand one last time, wiping the blood on their pants. "Sorry for the inconvenience."
With one last glance at you and Cavan, the intruder walked out of the room. You heard them walk down the stairs. A moment later, you heard the front door close with a resounding thud.
You rushed over to where Cavan was on the bed, draping an arm around him. You cradled his head against your chest, allowing him to cry into your shoulder. Against your better judgment, you peppered the top of Cavan’s head with soft kisses. You also mumbled soft words of encouragement and reassurance in an attempt to quash Cavan’s nerves.
It took a few minutes but Cavan eventually stopped crying. He lifted his head. You looked down at him and brushed a stray piece of hair out of his eyes. Cavan smiled, though it looked nervous and hesitant. He grabbed your wrist and directed it down to his lips. He looked up at you with hopeful eyes; you nodded as you took your other hand and brushed a different piece of hair out of his face. Cavan smiled again before he placed a gentle kiss on the inside of your wrist. He ran his thumb along the outside, right over the bone. You took your other hand and cupped Cavan’s face, leaning down and pressing a kiss to his forehead.
You sat on the bed next to Cavan and turned to face him. You grabbed his face and guided it towards you. Cavan swallowed as his eyes went wide and his cheeks slightly reddened. You smoothed your thumb along his cheekbone, humming in satisfaction as you did. Cavan blushed deeper, bringing his hand up and running it along your wrist.
“Stop me if you don’t want his, alright?” You said.
“Alri--” Cavan started to speak but you stopped him halfway by connecting your lips. Instead, he muffled the rest of the word into your mouth before he started moving his lips fluidly against yours.
As you kissed, you felt Cavan place his hand on your thighs. He ran them across the fabric there before he moved his hands up to your hips. He curved his hands along your hipbones, humming softly when he felt you wiggle against his hands. In retaliation, you brought your hands up and circled your thumbs around his chest. Cavan moaned, twitching on the bed.
"Uh… (Y/N)?" You jumped at the voice of one of Cavan’s teammates, Bo Bichette.
"Yes, Bo?" You asked, standing up off the bed and smoothing out your clothes.
"How'd you get here so fast? Cavan’s neighbour just called me when she saw some sketchy dude walk out the front door."
“I called them first,” Cavan piped up from behind you. You turned to look at him and noticed that his face was cotton candy pink and his hair was strewn all over the place. You swallowed thickly, knowing full well you had done that by kissing him.
Bo scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Leave it to you to realize that you’re in love with someone when an intruder breaks into your house with a gun.”
“Fuck off,” Cavan replied, though there was no heat behind his words. “As if you wouldn’t have called Vladdy first if the same thing happened to you.”
You huffed a bemused breath when you saw the death glare Bo gave Cavan in response. Bo looked at you sideways, though he also had no heat behind his intent. You chuckled bemusedly as you sat next to Cavan on the bed again and put your head on his shoulder. Cavan slung his arm around you, putting his hand on your upper arm and put his other hand on your knee. Bo’s face shifted from the glare of death to fondness as he looked at the pair of you.
“You both appear to be alright,” Bo said. “So I’ll go home now. Unless you want me to stay for a while?”
“No, it’s alright,” you replied, glancing up at Cavan. Cavan looked down at you and nodded before he pressed a kiss to your temple. “We’re fine here. I’m gonna spend the night to make sure he’s okay. We’ll call if we need anything, though.”
“Alright. Keep him safe. He’s known to panic and overthink almost everything.”
“I know, Bo. But thank you for reminding me.”
Bo gave a thumbs up and a soft smile before he walked out of the room. You heard him walk down the stairs, mill around in the foyer for a moment (presumably grabbing his jacket and shoes), and then open and close the front door. After waiting a moment to make sure Bo wasn't coming back, you lifted your head off of Cavan's shoulder and turned to look at him.
Cavan took that opportunity to lean in, pressing his lips softly to yours. You showed no sign of resistance so Cavan kept going. You did, however, melt into the kiss, cupping Cavan's cheek. You loved this feeling of kissing Cavan; you wished you never had to stop. You were enveloped in Cavan's cologne. It was a scent you didn't know the name of but it smelled vaguely of the ocean. It was something that had always been very soothing to you because the beach had been a happy place for you growing up; seeing the waves crashing the shore was very relaxing for you.
When you pulled back, Cavan wrapped you in a hug. He buried his head in the crook of your neck. You stayed like that for a moment, Cavan, sniffling softly into the crease of your shoulder and neck. When they pulled back, Cavan looked you in the eyes. His eyes were slightly wet and his cheeks had small tear tracks on them.
"I thought you'd never do that." Cavan smiled, his teeth slightly showing. It made him look so damn adorable to you.
You smiled back, a small blush creeping across your face. "I was just waiting for the right moment." You replied as you wiped away the tear stains on Cavan's cheeks.
Cavan smiled again, rubbing his thumb over your wrist. You blushed harder. Getting your feelings reciprocated was the best feeling in the world. I made you feel like a teenager that was just understanding what love was again. You also felt so alive, like you had finally discovered who you were and what you wanted. It was liberating.
"Hey, Cavan?" You grabbed Cavan's attention by tilting his face to look at you. Cavan looked expectantly at you, raising an eyebrow in anticipation. "How about I just never leave after I spend the night tonight? Somebody needs to protect the house while you're away. And we're dating now, so..."
Cavan smiled, wrapping you in a giant hug. He was smiling as he pulled back.
"Absolutely."
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zevlors-tail · 4 years ago
Note
Depressed and touch starved Shigaraki crushing hard on y/n, a new recruit for the league/liberation front. He wants to be in a relationship with her, but is afraid of her turning to dust by his own hands. Little does he know, she feels the same way.
Warnings: Jealous Shiggy, bit of OOC/Yandere Toga? Knives, brief mention of villains/heroes fighting, heavy pining, tiny argument between Shig and the reader.
Ever since the day he laid eyes on you, Shigaraki had it bad. You had only joined the League of Villains a couple months ago, but within that short time span, you had completely captivated his heart. Maybe it was your quick thinking, or your reserved personality, or maybe the way your eyes seem to sparkle with mischief when he talked to you about future plans for the League. Whatever it was, it drew him in further every time he looked at you, brought out feelings in him that he hadn’t felt in a very, very long time; feelings that both scared and excited him to the point where he wasn’t sure whether to pursue something with you or run away.
At first, he chose the latter. A week in to getting to know you and he was terrified that he had feelings for you, so he pulled away in every aspect imaginable. He ignored you during missions, talked to you as little as possible, and barely even looked your way. You were lucky if he even passed by you in the halls of the hideout. He spent most of his time pent up in his room muttering and trying to scheme, although any plans he attempted to make were ultimately thwarted by thoughts of you. It didn’t help that even with the forced distance between the two of you and his giving you the cold shoulder, you were ever the friendly and kind person you made yourself out to be. You still tried to talk to him on the occasions he passed by you, still tried to get to know him without judgement or bias. Ignoring you completely just seemed to make the situation worse for him, so he finally had to face his newfound feelings and accept that yes, he, Shigaraki, had a crush on the new recruit for the League.
But with the acknowledgement of those feelings came another realization: as much as he cared about you, he could potentially hurt you with his quirk. Even if you returned the feelings, further disaster could ensue because of his existence, and that fact stung like no other. All he wanted- no, all he needed -was you. Your touch, your laugh, your whole essence...there was no part of you he didn’t like. He spent nights dreaming of your soft lips, of embracing you from behind and pressing kisses to the top of your head, of loving you without worry and limitations, and yet, he couldn’t have you. The world was continuously cruel to him still, relentless and ever inventive in the ways it found to torture his soul. You, on the other hand...you were the only good thing he had to hold on to in this desolate place.
As Tomura paced the wooden floors of the bar, he brought a hand to his neck, the familiar itching sensation driving him to scratch the same spot over and over again. He hated that damn habit of his, though truthfully he didn’t think he could stop. It kept him sane, gave him something to focus on other than the murky anxiety he felt welling up inside of him. He was like this whenever you were gone, but more so today than ever; he couldn’t stand knowing you weren’t here in his line of sight, that you weren’t under his protecting and watchful eye. Currently, you were on recon with Dabi and Toga, and he had a sinking feeling that something was wrong. His gut lurched whenever he thought about you, and he wouldn’t be satisfied until you were back at the bar in your usual seat, your familiar smile spread over your lips as you sipped on your favorite drink.
“Kurogiri. Any word from them?” This was the second time he had asked about you and the other two LOV members today. His patience was running out now, and he just wanted you back.
“They’re due back at any time, now. I’m sure they’re alri-”
As if fate wanted to prove the bartender wrong, the door to the hideout blew open mid sentence, and Dabi stumbled in with your unconscious form slumped over his shoulders, Toga hot on his heals behind.
“What happened?” Tomura growled out, immediately making his way toward you.
“Recon gone wrong, that’s what,” Dabi quipped. “We got spotted by some heroes on accident, not our fault. Y/N fended them off but she overused her quirk, and they almost got her.”
“Don’t worry, I sliced them up real nice! They were no match against my pretty knives...” Toga trailed off, a murderous glint in her eyes as she brandished a clean knife to look at herself in it’s reflection. “And I saved Y/N. I made sure to teach them not to touch what’s ours, Tomura! No one can have Y/N but us!” She let out a demented giggle.
Shigaraki wanted to correct her. Not ours, mine, he thought. His possessiveness got the better of him, and one look at Toga’s intense gaze was all he needed for jealousy to take root. He surged forward and seized your form from Dabi, careful not to touch you with all five fingers at once as he held you up. Dabi put up no fight in letting you go, completely understanding the situation and passing you over to his boss.
“Is she hurt?” he asked demandingly, giving you a once over for any obvious signs of distress or wounds. He found none apart from small scrapes and bruises.
“I don’t think so. Just unconscious. Side effect of her quirk, I bet.” His blue eyes stared off into the distance behind you and Tomura, gears spinning in his head as he recalled the fight from earlier. “I’ve never seen her quirk in action like that before. She’s strong, I’ll give her that.”
Of course you were strong, Tomura wanted to say. He knew the basis for your quirk, the basics of how it functioned and how it affected others, but new nothing of the drawbacks of it. This was new to everyone.
“Y/N’s quirk is so cool! Isn’t she just the best, Tomura?” 
Something about Toga’s smile annoyed him and made the itchy burning sensation return to his neck. Before anyone else could say anything, he turned abruptly and started towards your room to lay you down and let you rest.
“Kurogiri,” he called as he was leaving, “I want a full report of the recon mission later, no details spared. Make sure they understand that.”
“Of course,” he replied cooly.
Tomura supported your frame against his shoulders as he trudged down the hallway with you, every step he took careful and measured so as not to disturb you any more than was necessary. His gut feeling had turned out to be right, after all. If he had just gone with you, this wouldn’t have happened. Even better yet, if he had just kept you here with him, then you wouldn’t have been in that situation in the first place. This was his fault, wasn’t it? It was hard to stop his thought process once it was started, and from there it all snowballed. You would never know how he really felt, and even if he was getting to touch you now, even if for a brief moment just to get you to your room, who’s to say something wouldn’t go wrong? What if he accidentally touched you with all five fingers, and you turned to ash right there in the hall, and died in his arms?
His thoughts were becoming too much to handle, even with you right there beside him. He was pathetic. Leader of a revolutionary and important group of misfit villains though he may be, he still wasn’t brazen enough to tell you how he really felt. And as he pushed open the door to your room and gently laid you down on your bed, he decided it was for the best if he just left you be. Even if he wanted to stay, it would do him no good. He gave you one last soft look and sighed heavily before standing. His brows knit together in frustration as he stepped forward, but a light tug on his sleeve kept him from going any further.
“Tomura...?” you mumbled groggily. “What happened?”
His self doubt slowly ebbed away at the sound of your voice, his anguish quieting for a moment as he down on your bed and met your gaze to explain. Who was he trying to fool? He could never just leave his feelings for you be. “You overused your quirk and fell unconscious. Dabi and Toga-” he shuddered involuntarily at her name, “took you back to the bar after fighting off some scum heroes.”
You sat up as he spoke, your head throbbing but otherwise feeling fine. “How did I end up in my room?” you wondered aloud, looking around to take in your surroundings fully.
“I carried you,” he answered matter of factly. 
He couldn’t be completely sure, but he swore a faint blush appeared on your cheeks then.
“Thanks for that.” You smiled kindly at him, warmth radiating from your features and making his face feel oddly hot.
“Oh, sure.” It sounded sarcastic, bitter even. Not how he wanted it to sound. He was getting frustrated again; why did he have to ruin everything he touched, figuratively and literally speaking?
There was a small lull in the conversation, and you unexpectedly reached your hand out for his, resting it on top and caressing his fingers gently in a sudden move of boldness. He recoiled almost instantly, and the next thing you knew he was moving to get up and walk away.
“Tomura, wait-” you tried, desperately wanting his attention. He did pause, but he didn’t turn around, and once again his hand found it’s way to his neck. He really was getting irritated with himself. 
“What?” he snapped, pivoting on his heel to face you.
“I’m sorry, I think I misinterpreted something...I- I didn’t mean to...” you trailed off, the dejected tone in your voice stabbing through his cold heart. “I thought you were-”
His blood ran cold at what he thought you were trying to say. Surely you couldn’t mean... 
“Thought I was what?”
“I thought- No, I think it was just me hoping this whole time, but...I thought maybe you had...feelings...for me. You seemed so concerned a minute ago, and there was that moment where your face- Um, I could see it behind your hair-” You stuttered out your words, embarrassed to admit your feelings that you were now certain he did not reciprocate.
Tomura, on the other hand, wasn’t sure what to say. You had just openly expressed your feelings for him while believing at the same time that he didn’t feel the same for you, and he hated it. He hated it with all the burning fires in the world, with all the passion and drive he had left. And the worst part about it was that it was his fault. He should have told you. He wished he had told you. He could still tell you...but he wouldn’t. Not if it meant endangering your life, not if it meant that he could potentially hurt you. He couldn’t bring himself to say the words.
Lucky for him, you weren’t willing to let this go so easily.
You saw the tortured look on his face, saw the longing in his eyes and the way his fingers twitched, as if he wanted to reach back out to you. With newfound resolve, you stared him down, willing him to break.
“Don’t look at me like that, damn it.” Curse you. Damn you to hell and back. You did things to him that you had no idea about. 
“So you really don’t feel the same?” you pressed, doubt creeping back up your spine. 
Maybe you were wrong after all...
“It’s not that!”
Or maybe not.
“Then what-”
“Don’t you know I could kill you?” The words left his lips before he could stop them. “I could accidentally turn you to dust, Y/N. Doesn’t that scare you? Or are you really that stupid?”
“I know that.” You spoke with conviction, understanding finally dawning on you.
He was afraid to hurt you. That had been his reason for pushing you away, for not talking to you, for trying to ignore his feelings for you. He was scared. And rightfully so, with a quirk like his. The thought had crossed your mind before, but truthfully, it hadn’t really been anything more than a passing thought. Once you really got to know Shigaraki, once you saw him leading his small family, you had put all of your trust and faith into him. He was not to be laughed at or underestimated; he was calculated, thorough, and kept his family together at all costs. Even if Dabi sometimes was unruly, even if Toga creeped him out, even if Kurogiri failed sometimes, they all belonged together, and you were happy to be a part of that. You admired him for everything he had done, everything he was currently doing, and all of the great things he would do in the future. Maybe others couldn’t see it right at the moment...but this man was going to change the world.
“But I believe in you, and I trust you would never do something like that to me, even on accident. I don’t think you give yourself enough credit.”
“Don’t patronize me.”
“I’m not. Your quirk doesn’t scare me. I mean it. And another thing,” you gave him a pointed look. “I’m not stupid,” you spat defiantly. For someone so reserved most of the time, you sure had an iron will. 
Tomura followed you with his eyes as you got up and attempted to walk over to him, but tripped in the process, still a little out of it from the overuse of your quirk. He was quick to catch you before you could hit the ground, and you smiled up at him once more while he just stared back at you, confused.
“What are you grinning like that for, hm?”
“I told you I trusted you. You didn’t turn me to dust, did you?”
“That’s not funny, Y/N.” Although, his words were all bark and no bite. What you had said was true, and it gave him a bit of relief to think that you were right.
He could make this work, after all. And for the first time in a very, very long time, Tomura Shigaraki felt calm. 
He helped you back to bed and sat down with you again, this time planning to stay. And when your hand once again found his, he let you keep it there, enjoying the warm feeling of your touch. 
“I know it’s not. I’m serious. I trust you with every fiber of my being, Tomura. I think I love you.”
He could have sworn his heart stopped, or maybe it was time itself that stopped. Either way, he never wanted this moment to end.
Instead of returning your words with his own, he layed down next to you and draped an arm over you. “You should be resting.”
You had once heard that everyone had different ways of saying ‘I love you’. For some, it was telling you to stay safe when parting. For others, it was asking if you had anything to eat yet. So when he spoke, you recognized the meaning behind Tomura’s words even if he wasn’t saying it outright. 
‘You should be resting.’
I love you, too.
A/N: WOW OKAY THIS GOT LONG. Also, I’m so, so, SO sorry this took so freaking long to finish. I literally sat down tonight and told myself I was going to work on it, and I got hit with inspiration and BAM it happened. Shigaraki is actually not on my list of characters that I write for, but because it was my first request and I wanted a challenge, I made an exception and wrote it. And damn, anon, did you give me one hell of a challenge. Holy FUCK. Idk why this was so hard to crank out before now, but I’m kind of in love with this? I hope you all like it as much as I do!
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tiifalockhart · 4 years ago
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Home
Anonymous asked: Hello! I was wondering if I could request something for Prompto x reader? I was hoping maybe the first time Prompto asks them to stay over? Nothing nsfw, as I know you don’t write that, but just like how Prompto is during a first sleepover with his s/o?
Pairing: Prompto x Reader
Warnings: alludes to anxiety
Word Count: 1k
A/N: helloo!! I absolutely loved this request and started working on it immediately! I love soft and fluffy Prompto, so I’m glad you sent this in!! I hope you enjoy it, and as always, feedback is appreciated! 
Ao3 || Masterlist
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When Prompto was first coming to you to ask the big question, his palms were sweaty and he was nervous. He knew he was overthinking it, but he was still worried and nervous. What if you thought he was weird? Or maybe he was rushing things?
Granted, you two had been dating for about a year now. You were currently on a date, dressed nicely and having a wonderful time with each other. You could tell that he seemed troubled near the end of the date though. He seemed to be concentrating, caught up in his personal thoughts, a slightly disgruntled look on his face.
"Prompto... Is everything okay?" You'd ask, concern evident in your features and tone. He'd whip his face up and raise his brows in surprise.
"What? Oh, yeah, yeah! I'm good, are you?" He replied hurriedly. You let out a light snicker at his response, nodding.
"I see... Is there anything you want to talk about, then?" You asked curiously, leaning your arms on the table. Prompto's face heated up at this, quickly looking away.
"Oh, uh, kind of. I was wondering, well no, I wanted to know... Well-" He took a deep breath, gathering himself. "D... Do you want to stay at my place after this? If not, it's totally okay. I don't mind! I can drive you home and stuff, it's alri-" You finally stopped him by taking his hand quietly.
"I'd love to." You answered simply, your voice calm and gentle. Prompto finally let out a breath of relief, one he hadn't known he was holding in.
"O-Oh, then that's great! Uh, do you want to stop by your house and get some clothes? Or, I mean, you can wear some of mine I guess? It's up to you, I don't mind anything." Prompto rambled. It was adorable when he got nervous, his rambling and nervous gestures caused your heart to swell.
"It's moments like these that remind me why I fell in love with you." You sighed softly, looking over at him with a loving gaze. His face and the tip of his ears were now red as he nodded in agreement.
On the way home, Prompto had calmed down significantly. He simply drummed his thumbs on the wheel nervously now. It was silent most of the way, the two of you sitting comfortably while he drove.
Once he parked in front of his apartment complex, you took his hand and followed him inside, noticing his expression giving away his nervousness again, along with a light blush. It was absolutely adorable. Inside, his apartment was clean and neat and nicely decorated. It looked homey, and big enough for a couple people to live there.
"I-I cleaned it before you came, I, uh, hope you like it here." He explained awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. You snickered at his mannerisms.
"It looks wonderful. I'm glad I'm staying here with you." You responded smoothly, opposing his flustered state completely. He offered you a sheepish smile, guiding you further inside.
"Feel free to leave your jacket and shoes anywhere, and you can borrow some of my clothes to sleep in, i-if you want." Prompto explained, opening the bedroom door for you. His bedroom was much simpler than the living area, his bed was neatly made, he didn't have much in there besides a dresser, bed, and desk with his photography equipment. He opened his closet for you, and your eyes basically zeroed in on his sweatpants and hoodies. After claiming one of each, you smiled over at him.
"Can I use your bathroom to change?" You asked, somewhat reminding him that you needed privacy.
"Oh, yeah!" He said, stepping aside and letting you pass and go into the bathroom. He quickly changed himself, taking a seat on his bed and waiting patiently. Once you returned, he grinned up at you, finally beginning to get more comfortable. "Do you... Wanna watch a movie, or something?" The blond asked, thinking of ways to spend more time with you.
"A movie would be nice." You answered, following him into the living area and falling back on the couch. The two of you spent more time searching for a movie to watch than actually watching one probably, carrying light conversations throughout it. Once you settled onto one, the two of you relaxed back and snuggled close to each other, sharing a blanket together.
As the movie started, the two of you found yourself uninterested in it, simply spending your time talking and cuddling and kissing under the blankets. It was a warm and fuzzy feeling, having him so close and comfortable, you never wanted to let that go. By the end of the movie, Prompto had fallen asleep on top of you, his head resting on his chest as your fingers brushed through his hair. It was adorable, you cursed yourself for wanting to move to the bedroom.
"Hey, Prompto?" You whispered softly, gently shaking him to wake him up. A quiet groan left his lips as he stirred.
"Yeah?" He asked, not opening his eyes and instead, snuggling into you more.
"Why don't we move to your bedroom?" You suggested, feeling his grip around your waist tighten. "Is that a no?" You asked, laughing quietly.
He simply hummed, you weren't quite sure what it meant. Eventually, he moved off of you and basically dragged himself to the bedroom, followed by you. Once inside, the two of you fell back on the bed and immediately cuddled closer, craving the same warmth you two developed on the couch. Once satisfied, Prompto almost immediately fell back asleep, causing you to bite back a smile. His expression was peaceful, his breathing was slow and steady, his heartbeat slowly lulled you off to sleep.
Eventually, the two of you fell asleep together. You hugged each other tightly, as if afraid someone would come and steal the other away. Your breathing was in sync, and your legs were tangled together.
It was... Perfect.
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famished-fander-idiot · 4 years ago
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Logan was by himself, his tie resting on his desk, the smeared frosting washed off his fingers. Deeply in thought, he brought his fingertips to his forehead, knuckles resting above his eyes. He hadn't wanted a party, he didn't need to be celebrated. It was a waste of time, and distracted them from keeping Thomas functional and stable.
He'd failed at stopping. Logan seemed to fail a lot these days.
He stripped himself of a tie, sitting alone in a scruffy polo, all alone, always alone. Logan felt,\ just that enough, he felt\ sad, and so very frustrated. He'd done his job in a timely fashion, yet he kept failing, kept being useless to Thomas. Janus might as well take his place.
Logan scoffed at himself, as if he already hasn't, to the picture frame above him. Messy sketches, Logan didn't understand why he kept it instead of something more his style, of the four of them. He couldn't sit in denial and say it wasn't heartbreaking, being left to his own devices, being skipped so easily. And it had hurt him, pained him and frustrated his head, his mind for hours after the assault.
By then, his breathing collapsed, calloused fingers running through his hair. Logan let himself fall apart, just this once, trembling lips and red eyes making him unprofessional, unworthy of being heard.
There was a knock. Long and quiet, and Logan could hear the *tap* *tap* on behind the wood. Worriedly, he stood, recklessly pushing his chair in and rubbing his cheeks of tears. He came up with wet hand and little progress. They might as well seem him like this. It wouldn't, shouldn't hurt him so much.
Logan blew out a breath before revealing his offender. There stood a worried Patton, running, possibly ruining, the ends of his cat onesie with his fingers. "Patton." Forcing his voice to be even, begging it wouldn't break, "Do you need my assistance?"
Patton, looking him up and down, chewing on his lip, countered, "I heard crying, can I-?" Breathless, he let himself walk past, they're fingers brushing as Logan shut his bedroom door.
Patton looked back at him, "Are you okay in here, Kiddo? I wouldn't want to overwhelm you at all, and I'm sure Roman didn't mean to add to much salt to the cake?"
Leaning against his chair, his palm open, Ligan replied unsteadily, "I am perfectly functional Patton." He frowned in turn, taking a step forward, "I don't mean on function, Logan, Are you doing okay?"
Patton paused, considering his options, before offering a cautious smile, taking Logans hand. The other was gripping his chair tight enough it turned white. "Can I hug you, sweetie?"
There was a moment, long and harsh, before Logan looked up once more, "I should hate you."
Patton nodded, rubbing the knuckles he held, "Surely. You should be madder than this."
Logan lightly rolled his eyes, "...madder?" He mumbled, before hesitantly lifting his arms. Patton didn't hesitate to fling his arms around him. And, oh, how it burned. It was warm, and sharp and everything but not enough.
Logan pressed himself in Pattons neck, hoping he didn't appear as shakey as he felt, wanting this feeling to last but knowing it wouldn't. Knowing that nothing lasts, inclusing this, and that Pattons only doing this for his tears, his birthday, for Logic. Not Logan.
"I should do this more often, you deserve far more attention than what you get, sweetie. I was coming up to apologize, actually, for what we've done to you and-and your shaking are you alri-" Patton went to move away, but that only encouraged Logan to tighten his grip, hiding his tear stained face for no one to see. "Please don't go."
Patton breathes out, closing his eyes, "Never"
I was going for fluff, but I made it a lot angstier.
Woopsie doodles!
So heres some Logicality hurt/comfort for yeah. Totally not because I'm touch starved and have no one, totally not that. Cue nervous laughter.
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umbry-fic · 3 years ago
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A Palette Full of You (4)
Summary: Glimpses into Colette and Lloyd’s lives as they grow up together, learn who they are, and fall in love with each other.
(Written for Colloyd Week 2021)
Fandom: Tales of Symphonia Characters: Colette Brunel, Lloyd Irving Relationships: Colette Brunel/Lloyd Irving Rating: G Chapter: 4 of 6 Word Count: 5897 Mirror Link: AO3 Original Post Date: 12/06/2021
Chapter Title: Stardust
Chapter Summary: The astronomy club holds a stargazing event on the school rooftop. As chairperson, there's no chance Lloyd isn't going to invite Colette. But as the night progresses, actually spotting the hard-to-find stars become the least of Colette's concerns.
(Colloyd Week Day 4: Stargazing)
Notes+Warnings: Chapter 4 of my multi chapter Colloyd week fic! Warning for some major internalised acephobia.
Chapter list Full fic Previous chapter Next chapter
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16-years-old
Stepping out of the science lab into the corridor, Colette came to a halt, her schoolbag weighing on her shoulders, soaking in the warm air as other students filed past her. One of the most unfortunate things about attending practical make-up was that she wasn't guaranteed her usual seat by the lab window. Sitting right under the air-con was enough to send her into hibernation, and the test was hard enough as it was. She'd barely managed to finish on time.
Rummaging through the pocket of her navy blue pinafore, her fingers brushed past a packet of tissue and her wallet before successfully pulling her phone out. She needed a reminder of where the stargazing event was taking place, and who better to ask than Lloyd? She hoped he was reading his messages.
"7.23 pm, May 18th" blinked at her from her phone screen.
Wait, 7 missed calls? From Lloyd? What for?
Gah, she’d forgotten to tell him.
She dialled his number, placing the phone against her ear and waiting for his anxious voice to ring out. Which it did, just seconds later as he picked up.
“Colette? Where are you? I tried calling you so many times, and Sheena and Zelos wouldn’t pick up because they’re both at tuition!”
“I forgot to tell you the makeup got pushed by an hour. Sorry for making you worry, Lloyd. But I’m done now. Where’s the event at?”
"We’re on the school rooftop! Where we celebrated Sheena's birthday last month, remember?" Lloyd replied, his voice tinny in quality from the phone call. She could hear, in the background, the overlapping sounds of many voices.
“School rooftop, school rooftop, school rooftop…” she mumbled, beginning to scurry through her secondary school's corridors, head darting every which way to determine where she was and try to find clues as to where she was going. She didn’t often wander into this part of the school campus - block D, the science block - since she only took two sciences. Usually, she’d take the main staircase straight down to the canteen, but it would take forever to get back to the roof from there. She didn’t want to be too late.
“You’re coming from science lab 3, right? If I remember correctly, it’s one right, walk past the storage room to block C, and then take the first left down the bridge to block B. You should see the staircase to the roof. Do you need me to come and get you?”
“No, no, it’s fine! Just stay on the phone?”
“Alri - OI, MATTHEW, STOP MESSING WITH THE TELESCOPE! YOU DO NOT GET SPECIAL TREATMENT JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE MY DESKMATE! GET YOUR HANDS OFF AND LET ELLA HANDLE IT!” The yell was muffled, probably because Lloyd had taken the phone away from his mouth to avoid deafening her, though his raised voice was still enough to make her wince, tearing the phone away from her ear.
“Sorry about that,” Lloyd said, his voice lowered back to normal volume again. “Got to prevent property damage. You know how it is.”
“Right…” She laughed nervously, wondering how many people were up on the rooftop and what exactly they were up to. She was hoping to spend a peaceful evening stargazing with Lloyd and listening to him talk about constellations, the shining passion in his eyes rivalling even the stars above, not… getting distracted by people fooling around.
“How’s it going? Are you getting closer?”
“I’m pretty sure I’m heading in the right direction,” she assured Lloyd, taking the left he’d directed her to and running down the bridge connecting two blocks, her ponytail flaring behind her and her pinafore swirling around her legs. There was almost no one left in the school now. The hallways she’d run through had been abandoned, for the most part, the stragglers she passed by all heading in the direction of the main gate. The sky, visible from the bridge, was in the last throes of twilight, slowly bleeding into night as black seeped across the sky.
Colette skidded to a halt at the end of the bridge, gaze landing on a familiar door. She could recall this stairwell now, having taken it two months ago. She, Zelos and Lloyd had somehow managed to lead a blindfolded Sheena up it, whereafter they had surprised their friend with a birthday cake they had baked together. That birthday cake had been salvaged solely by Zelos, who was a surprisingly good baker. Or maybe they were just average, and weren't knocking over the baking tray every ten minutes like her.
“I’ve found the right staircase!” Colette said, hanging up and stuffing her phone back into her pocket and starting to take the stairs two at a time. She usually never did that (and was often teased by Sheena over it), choosing to climb each step carefully, for the risk of tripping was too high. But she was in a hurry, and so had no other choice. Her shoe-laces were coming undone, and her school bag seemed to be getting heavier with each step.
Everyone else who was attending the event was likely already on the rooftop - Colette could hear voices and the sounds of footsteps against concrete through the open door at the top of the stairwell. Grabbing the cold metal handle, she threw the door open, finally emerging onto the rooftop.
There were about thirty or so people milling around, everyone still dressed in their school uniforms, chatting with friends, holding cups of fruit punch or lounging on the mats that had come from the gymnasium. Not enough people to count as a crowd, but certainly respectable. Just a small event, one where she could relax and enjoy some peace and quiet.
Now she just had to find Lloyd...
"Colette!"
Speak of the devil! Or the angel, perhaps... Colette tracked the source of the voice and spotted Lloyd, making his way over from a group of students who were busy fiddling with a telescope, his hand gripping a red plastic cup. One side of his collar was flipped up, and the small shooting star pin that marked him as the chairperson of the astrology club was pinned to the other. Only one of the sleeves of his white blouse were folded like they were meant to be, the other way too long and leaving barely any skin visible above his elbow. His white long pants had been rolled up as much as possible - which wasn't much, honestly, the most it could reach was mid-thigh. It was one of those stuffy nights with no wind that was stifling and hard to fall asleep in.
"You made it!" Lloyd's grin grew wider as he grabbed her hand, only for him to flinch away instantly, vivid red liquid nearly sloshing over the rim of his cup. “Gah, your hand is really cold.”
"Sorry! You know how cold the lab is. Anyway, I only made it here thanks to your assistance." Colette laughed, feeling her weariness peel off her instantly. Lloyd always had that effect on her - his energy was infectious, like it was being injected straight into her veins whenever she was in close proximity to him. Especially now, with clear excitement alive on his face.
It was strange, though. He was the only one with that effect on her. Meeting her other friends never failed to make her happy, but Lloyd was the only one that could make her feel ten times more alive in an instant the moment she saw his smile. It had only started in the past year, this unknown, electrifying sensation that arose in her heart whenever she was with Lloyd. The desire to see him again after school ended got stronger with each day, but she couldn’t understand any of it…
“You’re staying for the afterparty, right?” Lloyd asked, taking a sip of the fruit punch. He said afterparty, but she knew it wouldn’t be much of a party. Just all the members of the astrology club hanging out in the tiny room the school had assigned to them, playing card games and chatting. Everyone in the club knew her by name, for she was the friend of their chairperson who somehow managed to turn up at every meeting. She was practically an honorary member at this point.
A homey gathering without any alcohol in sight. She much preferred it that way. The last time alcohol had come into play when she was staying overnight at a chalet with the rest of her class, sometime late last year. She'd avoided the cans of beer stacked on the floor, the smell not appealing to her. But alcohol sure made the rest of her classmates go wild. Running away from slightly drunk classmates trying to get her to play truth and dare was not fun. Normal truth and dare was already horrible, with questions like "who are you crushing on" and "who would you like to kiss". She didn't understand why it was a game that people insisted be played at every class gathering or orientation. No one ever believed her when she answered honestly with "no one", and she was fairly used to the reactions by now, the common ones being that she had to be lying, for everyone had someone in mind, or that she should stop acting so high-and-mighty, or just snickers of her being a prude.
Just because she was used to the biting words didn't mean they had stopped hurting, reminder stacked atop reminder of how she was isolated from everyone else around her. And as much as she hated answering "truth" whenever that accursed bottle landed on her, answering "dare" was even worse. There were the innocent ones like doing the chicken dance, and then there was having to kiss someone. She always did her best to leave as soon as the bottle made an appearance, but she could never say "no" when someone asked her directly to join, for she never knew how to turn people down. Neither did she want to give her classmates more reasons to treat her as a laughingstock for being too much of a coward to play. So now, whenever she was forced to play the game, she would give the least offensive answers possible - mostly girls, for she at least found them pretty, though she didn't think that was what attractive meant.
But the drunk version of truth and dare? That was hell on Earth. The questions got even more invasive. She could never understand how someone could ask "who would you sleep with here" with a straight face. And alcohol loosened the lips of her classmates, enough that she had heard snippets of some of the more adventurous ones describing their sexual escapades in sickening detail. She really didn't need the reminder that sexual activities weren't just a thing of fiction, but something that actually happened amongst real people and that people seemed to really want to do. She'd spent half of that chalet stay playing Uno with Zelos in a corner, because Zelos was way better at promptly rejecting offers to play truth and dare.
Only her friends had ever come to her defence, but it was not like they could help that much when they weren't in the same class, apart from Zelos. Still, they afforded much-needed safety, and they never pointed out how she was weird or strange or different, even if they must have noticed by now. But...
She was 16. Wasn't she supposed to get it by now?
“Yep, I'm staying. We can go home together,” Colette suggested, tearing her thoughts back to the present. "Dad already knows I'll be coming home late, and Aunt Anna can just pick us both up."
Colette reached out to fold Lloyd's right sleeve, straightening the wrinkles out, before reaching to flip his collar down. His uniform was always in such a state of disarray, and it was always up to her to get him looking neat before the teachers did their inspections during morning assembly.
"Yep, I'll let Mom know," Lloyd replied, squeezing her hand. "Let's actually get to stargazing, shall we? Come on, I reserved the mat with the best telescope. The..."
Colette let Lloyd ramble on about the specifications of the telescope as he guided her towards their destination. It was always endearing to hear him talk about the topics he loved, whether it be the ocean or the stars. His words would get faster as he went on, until he was barely intelligible as all the syllables clumped together, without him even noticing. She didn’t want to interrupt him, though, much preferring to just watch him as a smile inevitably grew on her face.
"Right! Get comfortable!" Lloyd said, having completed his spiel and coming to an abrupt stop. Colette stumbled a few steps forward, so engrossed in listening to Lloyd that she'd nearly tripped. He gestured towards the deep blue mat stuffed with foam, placing his cup next to it before crouching to adjust the sleek black telescope, nimble fingers flying from knobs to levers. His face was scrunched up in concentration, focussed entirely on his task.
Colette dumped her school bag down and kicked off her school shoes, leaving her feet clad in white socks, and scrambled onto the mat, lying down on it. Lloyd joined her soon after, having finished whatever preparations he was doing, sidling closer on the mat so that his shoulder pressed against hers as they both stared up into the night sky, now completely dark. In the distance, Colette could see the lighted-up M sign on the business complex.
“We can look at the stars first before we use the telescope to find the planets. What do you see, right now?”
"Um, well… I can only see one star in the sky," Colette muttered, pointing out the lone, twinkling presence. It was common knowledge that there was too much light pollution to actually see any of the vast galaxies and planets that were scattered throughout the universe. The most Colette had ever seen at once when looking out at the sky from the balcony of her apartment was three stars, dimly shining and far away from each other. They were hundreds of light-years away, unreachable and yet still shining their light for all to see.
"No, there's more. It's a really clear sky tonight, and we can see so much!" Lloyd replied eagerly. The starry-eyed enthusiasm had returned to his eyes, seeming to burrow straight into her heart. Pointing up into a particular patch of sky, he said, "There! Do you see the top of the Big Dipper?"
"Ah..." She tried to follow the line of his arm but didn't spot any hidden stars, shaking her head. "No...? The Big Dipper is the one that looks like a frying pan, right?" It was one of the many constellations that Lloyd had taught her while on his impassioned rambles about astrology. Ever since he'd picked up that one book on constellations from the library in primary school, he'd been obsessed with stars. She could still fondly remember the first time he had talked about it. She'd plopped down in front of him at the canteen table after school, asking what he was reading. He'd shut the book and told her about white dwarfs, planetary systems and the Milky Way for a full five minutes while she listened in awed silence. She'd rarely seen him this excited over anything. Lloyd had been about to continue before shutting his mouth abruptly, flushing as he realised how long he had gone on for and apologising for running her ear off. She'd told him that she didn't mind listening to him - there was something soothing about it, really, listening to his voice and watching his excited mannerisms.
"You remember?" Lloyd craned his neck so that he was facing her. There was something in the depths of those eyes that stared back at her. Something which, for the past two years, she would spot occasionally. And yet she still couldn’t put a name to it.
Somehow, how truly close they were hadn’t registered in her mind until this very moment. If she inched forward just a little, their noses would bump.
But they’d been this close so many times before. Why was this time so different?
Or, more accurately, what had changed in the past year? Why couldn’t she be this close without something in her clicking, filling her with a warmth that was both familiar but foreign? Why were her palms starting to sweat, her heart starting to race? It felt like she was about to give a presentation to a room full of strangers.
But that wasn't the case. She was just next to Lloyd, her oldest friend and the person she trusted most in the world.
Perhaps recently she had been noticing more tiny things she hadn't before, staring at him for just a little longer than she used to - how his hair fell into his eyes on days where he didn’t bother to comb or style his hair, how there was a dimple only on the right side of his mouth, how his hair could vary in shade under different lighting, from a golden brown to dark chocolate. It even appeared red sometimes.
She felt like she was at the cusp of a discovery.
"Of - of course I remember." Colette stumbled over the words, averting her gaze up towards the night sky. "You've been working on the notes for this club for so long, and I helped you with them! So of course I'd remember."
"That's true. We did spend a lot of late nights on those." Lloyd chuckled. "Remember all the pillow fights?"
"Yeah, I do. You always let me win, you cheater," she grumbled, glad for the light-hearted change in topic to distract from her confusing feelings. "But I'm happy everything worked out and you managed to get the club set up! You've worked really hard on all this. You deserve the success."
"I couldn't have done it without you, really," Lloyd retorted, taking gentle hold of her wrist. "And I know I've thanked you already, but let me just say it again. Thank you. In return, I'll do my best to show you as much as I can!" Lloyd pointed her arm towards a point in the sky. "There. Look closely. Do you see it now?"
She focussed on that spot, squinting in hopes that the secrets of the night sky would be revealed to her. "Oh!" Colette exclaimed. She could see it now, just barely - a faint source of light. There was a lonely little star, shining as brightly as it could, just enough to be noticeable but going unseen by the unobservant eye.
"You got it!" Lloyd cheered, beginning to slowly guide her hand to trace out a shape - that familiar pan shape he’d drawn for her so many times. His fingers, wrapped around her wrist, were so warm... "Now do you see the Big Dipper?"
"You're right," she said in amazement. The pattern had been there all along. How many more were waiting to be found, causing the sky to come to life before her very eyes?
"There are so many beautiful constellations to find in the sky." Lloyd grinned. Dimly lit by the gentle light of the night sky, far from the harsh fluorescent lights of the classroom and the often blinding rays of the sun, his features seemed softer than ever, and she had the urge to just... reach out and touch his face. Splay her fingers on his cheek, rest her forehead against his, let the strands of his hair fall through her fingers…
"Yeah..." She glanced back up at the night sky. She could spot the Little Dipper now, glimmering. Already, she was discovering new things.
When she glanced back, Lloyd was staring at her with a wistful expression, the arm not holding hers held stiffly against his side, like he was aching to reach out but was holding himself back.
The moment was gone, as quickly as it had come, and Lloyd's face once again sported a happy smile, like nothing of significance had happened. Perhaps she had imagined the whole thing. But in just a few seconds, the entire centre of her world had shifted, throwing her irreversibly off balance.
Her chest felt constricted, like she couldn't breathe properly, that strange sensation back in her heart again.
But it would be a lie to say she hadn’t figured out what it was. She had fallen into the unfamiliar pit of love, just as she had always wanted. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say she had fallen a long time ago, but had only just realised she wasn’t standing on solid ground any longer.
She had found The One. Finally.
So why... Why had nothing changed at all?
It was no longer possible to convince herself that she could be just like everyone else. Not when she was acutely aware of how stupidly immature she was compared to everyone else, always cringing away from the thought of sex. Whether it be skipping raunchy scenes in books or shows, avoiding popular pop songs with explicit lyrics, or promptly deciding to stop listening whenever her classmates decided it was a good time to talk about it. She couldn't rid herself of nausea that would roil in her stomach. But... that was wrong, wasn't it?
If she loved someone, she was supposed to desire them. That's what happened in all the stories - people fell in love, and then they happily had sex with each other. It was everywhere. In every book, in every show. Even the terrible sex-ed lessons had parroted that a happy relationship was one with healthy amounts of sex. Everyone was going to have sex at some point once they got into a relationship, to want to have it and to eagerly give it. But she didn't. She had never felt the same way. And that was her truth, the one that went unregarded by others.
Or maybe her truth was that she was just broken. That something had shattered inside of her a long time ago, and now she couldn't be put back together, couldn't feel what she was supposed to, what others did. And she didn't know what to do about it.
No matter how much she hated the idea of sex, someday she’d have to force herself to go through with it. After all, it was a requisite for a relationship. Otherwise, she wouldn’t be worthy of love, and she didn’t love her partner enough. She owed it to whoever her partner was, even if one day it ended up being Lloyd. This was her fault, after all. No one else was broken in the same way as her.
It would just be like… forcing herself to eat her vegetables when she was younger, wincing over the yucky taste until she got used to it. Nothing more. Easy.
Maybe then she’d finally get it.
Maybe then everything would magically fix itself.
Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes which she willed to disappear. She felt like the stars above. Shining alone, so far away from any other companion, looking down upon a world that was too far away to understand. All alone. Always all alone.
"Too bad we can't see more here in the city. One day, I promise, we'll see the real starry sky together! The galaxies, the planets, the suns... All of it. It'll be amazing," Lloyd continued, oblivious to her inner turmoil. Because even he could not read her mind.
Colette folded her hands over her stomach, closing her eyes. The enormity of the emotion beating in her heart absolutely terrified her, as did the thought of the future and what awaited her. Could she ever act on these feelings? Would she ever be deserving of acting on them, inadequate as she was? Did she even really love him?
There was no use in agonising over these thoughts, for no answers would ever be found.
"I'd like that," she whispered, squeezing his hand. She was more than willing to just enjoy his company for now. Her dearest friend.
“I’ll show you the rest of the stars that are visible today! Then we can look into the telescope and see the nebula. I’ve already pointed it in the right direction! You won’t want to miss it, it’s incredible! Over there is…”
So long as she could remain with him, everything would be alright.
~~~
“Bye, Lloyd!” Ella said, waving as she sprinted out of the club room. “Have a safe trip home!”
“You too!” he called out after her, as loud as he could without waking up Colette. Her head was resting on his lap, the hair she had freed from her ponytail forming a golden sea that swallowed his legs. Her arms were still wrapped tightly around the huge penguin plush that acted as the club’s unofficial mascot. He couldn’t for the life of him recall where it’d come from.
How did he always end up being Colette’s pillow? Not that he was complaining…
Lloyd ran a gentle hand through Colette’s hair, making sure not to awaken her. Mom would take another 20 minutes to arrive at the drop-off point, so he might as well let Colette continue to sleep. After all, he still had to clean up and lock up the room. At least Colette had helped him with most of it.
He moved his hand rhythmically, watching her minute facial movements. What dream was she having right now? Was it a happy one? He hoped it was. He wanted nothing more than to see a truly happy smile on her face every day, and that was the root of the feelings that had built up over years.
In the ensuing silence, he couldn’t help but think back.
What had happened while he was showing her the stars? There had been a period of time when she had seemed to withdraw into herself, becoming far quieter than she usually was. Almost contemplative. Even a little sad.
She had been back to normal afterwards, cheerful with her large smiles and bright laughter. He didn’t know how to question her about it, didn’t know how to even start the conversation. He wanted to find out, so he could help, in any way he could.
But… No matter how much he hated it, he could only wait. After all, if whatever was weighing on her was simple, she would have told him already. He could only hope she’d be able to tell him about what was troubling her, someday.
And he would wait. For as long as needed…
~~~
26-years-old
Lloyd set the rental car in reverse, slowly backing it up into the empty lot in the mostly deserted car park, the wheels crunching against gravel. Turning off the engine, he pulled the keys out of the ignition and stuffed them into the pocket of his jeans. Glancing over at the seat next to him revealed that Colette was peacefully asleep, head lolling onto her shoulder. Somehow, the abrupt bump in the road some ten minutes ago hadn't woken her up.
This was their second day in Melbourne to celebrate their honeymoon. Dad and Mom had come here for their honeymoon too, but maybe some things become a tradition for a reason. He and Colette had followed a strict itinerary, taking some advice from his parents when planning where to go. They had visited the fisheries for lunch yesterday, where Colette had sung the praises of the fish fillet, absolutely delighted at its freshness, which could never be experienced at home. Following which, they had driven to Phillip island to catch the nightly penguin parade, Colette cooing over all the little penguins waddling home. It was a cute sight - both the penguins and Colette.
It was the middle of winter, the temperature just shy of needing actual winter gear but cold enough that they were both wearing turtlenecks, not accustomed to the winter winds. A bit of a shame, actually. He would have loved to witness the adorable sight of Colette in a beanie that covered her ears, cheeks flushed from the cold and fingers housed in fluffy gloves. But alas, that sight would only remain in his imagination until they travelled to a country with much colder weather.
The car journey had been silent, Colette alternating between staring at the rare car that passed them on the narrow dirt roads, or doodling on her phone with a stylus, occasionally letting out a tiny giggle. As they had agreed upon, she had stopped looking out of the window for the last leg of their journey, which was close to a whole hour. At some point she had stopped making conversation with him, soft snores replacing the sound of her voice as the quiet night and hours of travelling had finally taken their toll.
He reached out a hand to hover over her shoulder, hesitating. He didn’t want to disrupt her rest, but she wouldn’t be seeing anything if she didn’t wake up, and that would render all his effort to transport the two of them into the remote meaningless. He had no choice.
“Colette.” He called her name softly, gently shaking her shoulder until she let out a tiny sigh. Her eyes fluttered open, still filled with sleepiness.
“We’re here. It’s time to get out of the car,” he said, grabbing hold of the strands of her hair that had fallen into her face during her sleep and tucking them behind her ear.
“Oh. Thanks for waking me up.” Colette yawned, covering her mouth with her hand as she stretched, trying to shake the sleep out of her system. “I need to cover my eyes while I get out, right?” she said, covering her eyes with her palms and giggling, doing exactly as they’d discussed without question. “I can’t look until you say so! Can’t spoil the surprise now, right?”
“Perfect! I’ll help you out of the car. Wait there.”
Lloyd stepped out of the car, shutting the door and running over to her side. He opened the passenger-side door, grabbing hold of her bent arms.
"Carefully now," he muttered, slowly helping Colette out of the car and steadying her when she stumbled slightly onto the gravel. Taking a stronger hold around her arm, he began to guide her across the carpark towards a small hill, walking backwards and taking the occasional peek behind his shoulder to get a gauge for where he was going. With each step they took, the loose bits of gravel under their feet were kicked aside.
The grassy hill was a little harder to go up backwards, but he persevered. The grass was wet with dew, starting to wet the hem of his jeans as they brushed the skin of his ankles. Colette was completely silent, seemingly holding her breath in anticipation of the big reveal.
The trip out here had been exceedingly long, for this place truly was off the beaten path. He could count the number of people here with the fingers on one hand. But he could certainly say the trip had been worth it. Just sneaking a peek upwards was enough to make up for everything. This place really lived up to all the praise it had been given online.
Making sure they had a wonderful view of the sky, Lloyd came to a stop, turning Colette by the shoulders so she was facing the right direction. "You can look now," he whispered into her ear, tapping her shoulder and stepping back.
Colette uncovered her eyes and let out an audible gasp, transfixed by the night sky. They were far from civilization, so distant that there were no artificial lights to interfere with the natural dance of the stars. Laid out above them were millions of stars, clustered together and twinkling in unity. Swirls of pink and purple denoted the galaxies, resembling little bits of cotton candy painted onto the black canvas of the sky, interspersed with tiny dots that represented planets. The entire universe was spread out before their eyes to witness, splendid and magnificent.
He watched as she raised an arm, tracing the skies slowly. It almost seemed like her index finger was trailing stardust. He wouldn't be surprised if she actually was, since she was already pure magic in every other way.
She turned to face him, the starlight reflecting in her wide eyes and off the ring on her left hand, painting her as a more beautiful sight than even the gorgeous skies above him.
"You remembered!" she exclaimed, running over to throw her arms around him, knocking him back slightly as she smiled up at him. Thankfully, they were nowhere near the edge of the incline, or they would have gone tumbling down a long way. This close, he was even more reminded of her untouchable beauty: her shimmering blue eyes were breathtaking. "You kept your promise."
Colette moved her arms so they were wrapped behind his neck. She was practically hanging off of him; his gaze focussed on her smiling face.
"Well, I wanted to see it too." He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to press a kiss on her forehead. "And I always do my best to keep my promises."
I promised that I would never leave you, and I will keep that promise. No matter what.
“They’re all together now. They’re not alone anymore,” Colette said, "Thank you." She rested her head against his shoulder, his hands automatically shifting to her back, holding her close. "I love you."
She said those words so easily now, without the hesitance that had bogged her down at the beginning. He knew not all of her fears and insecurities were gone - maybe they never would be, and all they could do was reassure each other. There were the terrible nights where she would sob next to him and admit she felt like a fraud for being unable to give him sexual intimacy, crying that she wasn't enough and that he deserved so much more. All he could do was hold her in his arms and whisper into her hair that it was alright, that he loved her, that he didn’t care. But as time went on, those nights became less frequent, until they were few and far between. Besides, she did give him pieces of that intimacy, whenever she could - the gift he cherished, for it truly meant the world coming from her.
"I love you too. Picture?" he offered, holding up his phone. He wanted to create a physical memory of this magical moment, one that they could preserve forever.
Besides, if his parents didn’t get a photo, they would probably murder him. Mom, at least. So would Sheena, with Zelos’ snickering as an accompaniment to the crime. He wouldn’t live to see another day once he got back home.
"Of course," she replied. And he hoped the picture would be able to capture her bright smile, that which was most precious to him.
~~~
The picture they took would become a cherished memento, to be displayed on their nightstand forever - Colette pressing a kiss to his cheek, even as she gave him bunny ears, both of their faces lit up with large smiles.
~~~
Next chapter
4 notes · View notes
hu4ngs · 5 years ago
Note
your jeno au was good!! can i get a jaehyun friends to lovers au please?
omg jaehyun’s my bias, we’re in for a RIDE babey
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okay so we need to settle why you and jaehyun are friends in the first place okay
it’s because when you two were 16, you were deskmates and you’d always lose your pencils or rulers or erasers, basically everything
sometimes you wonder where it went until today too
and jaehyun, being the sweetheart he is, he’d always lend you his
so you two became friends pretty quick
and now it’s been years since you guys started being friends
both of you watched each other grow into the fine human beings you are today
you guys aren’t so close now though, since jaehyun and you take different courses in college
he’d still give you a smile or send you a ‘how are you’ text when he gets the chance
jaehyun’s quite popular in college, i mean, he’s a sweetheart, everyone loves him
you’re not necessarily popular, nor are you a loser, you’re just,,, There, you know what i mean
so anyway
today was like any other day
you ran out of eggs so now you need to run to the store
it’s okay tho
you need some exercise anyway, plus, you had nothing to do at home
after buying what you needed, you decided to stop at the ice cream parlor nearby
to your surprise, the college’s sweetheart is working there
jaehyun was surprised to see you too
“y/n? hey!”
“nice seeing you here, jae”
he was being friendly as per usual, asking you how you’ve been
so you ended up catching up a teeny bit before his co-worker nudged him to get him back to work
after getting your order, you bid your thank you
“i’ll text you!” he tells you
“who was that?”
jaehyun kinda smiled thinking of you
“they’re my friend. the high school friend i told you about”
his co-worker kinda nodded knowingly, “oh, that’s y/n? they’re cute”
“shut up, yuta”
“i didn’t do shit!”
meanwhile, upon seeing jaehyun today, outside of school, wearing his glasses, his hair kinda messy, you can’t help think he looked attractive
as unbelievable as it may sound for you, you were kept waiting for his text
but after hours of waiting, hours of distracting yourself from your phone to keep you from waiting, he never did
you wouldn’t admit you’re a little upset
but you are a little upset
maybe he was just being nice when he said that
why was i actually hoping? we’re not even close anymore
you laughed at yourself for actually getting upset over something stupid
then it happened
your phone rang!!!!!!
someone texted you!!!!!
you’ve never checked your phone SO QUICK before
“you up y/n? i literally forgot i had an assignment due tomorrow :(”
“i’m so tired”
congratulations, he double texted you
your heart was racing for some reason
okay, calm down, it’s just two, regular texts from a friend
but he double texted
it took you a moment to realised what you’re doing at the moment
you’re literally spazzing over jaehyun
congrats, jaehyun’s got you smitten
after getting back into your senses, you reply him
“are you almost done with it though?”
boi let me tell you he replied so quickly
“yeah, i just pray i wouldn’t be late to class tomorrow”
“why are you up though?”
he double texted again!!!!!
he’s got you laying in bed at 2 am, feeling all giddy inside
“i don’t have any classes tomorrow, so i’m watching a movie”
he replied as fast as lightning again wow
“lucky”
so basically
this kinda went on for a few more weeks
jaehyun would text you more often
and you’d go to the ice cream parlor more often
one day, you go there in hopes of seeing jaehyun
you wanted to ask him out to watch a movie together
but there was only yuta
you made your order so that you wouldn’t seem obvious you were looking for a certain employee
“hey, where’s jaehyun”
“he called in sick, why?”
“oh, i wanted to ask him out, a-as friends, of course!”
yuta gave you a smug face
you nervously looked away
“so tell me, y/n, do you find jaehyun attractive?”
you’re shocked
why’s this dude yuta asking you this
“um, why are you asking me this?”
another smug face
“well, he finds you attractive”
you almost choked
but you played it cool
“yeah, very funny”
yuta was surprised you’d be this stupid clueless
“why else would he text you every day for!”
you were silent
“you should go visit him. bring him some soup or something. go work it out lovebirds!”
so that’s how you ended up buying a porridge for jaehyun
you knew where he lives since he hasn’t moved out since he was 16
we love consistency
you’re not even sure why you’re even doing this
it’s not even confirmed that he likes you
and you don’t even know if you like him
you stood there in front of his door
you could just leave the porridge on his doorstep, hit the doorbell, and leave
but you didn’t
you somehow didn’t
you surprisingly didn’t
when he opened the door and saw you, he was surprised
“hey, y/n, i’m kinda sic-”
you cut him off by handing him the porridge you bought
“h-how did you know…?”
his ears were evidently red
“yuta told me…”
jaehyun was flustered, but he gave you a shy smile
“thanks, y/n”
the moment you made eye contact with jaehyun, and his dimples were on display, that’s when you realised
that’s when you knew you do like him
maybe it’s just a teeny tiny crush
but is it really a teeny tiny crush, if you’ve felt like this every time he makes eye contact with you?
somehow you were brought back to the time when you were 16 year olds
back when he’d tease you for getting tired before you even ran a third lap
back when he’d wave and make funny faces at you from outside the class whenever you get into detention
back when you would accuse him for stealing your stationaries
back when both of you would compete who would finish their work given by your teachers first
every time he does something to you, you’d have this familiar feeling
it wasn’t really butterflies
it was more of feeling at ease, knowing you’ve associated yourself with the right person
knowing that in the future, you’d remember him, and only remember the good memories
because you’ve never made any bad memories with jaehyun, it was all smiles and happiness when it comes to him
“y/n?”
you snapped out of it
you were tearing up when you realised you’ve gotten yourself a little too emotional
“y/n, is everything alri-”
“jaehyun, i…”
you were hesitant
if you confess, every thing will be very different from that moment on
but you’d rather be true to someone like jaehyun, rather than living a life with the regret of doing otherwise
“jaehyun, i like you”
there was a long pause, you’re literally panicking
“i like you. since the first day i’ve talked to you. talking to you was the best decision i’ve ever done. it’s okay if you don’t like me back, i just want you to know how i’m really feeling, from the bottom of my heart-”
you were crying now
you don’t even know why you’re crying
you’re just overwhelmed with feelings
it took you back to when jaehyun was encouraging you to confess to your crush when you were 17, and you ended up crying because you were scared
after the long, awful pause from jaehyun, he finally laughs
he set the porridge down, and then took you in for a hug
“you’re always such a baby!” he said as he comforted you
“now, now. what would my neighbours say when they see you crying at my doorstep like this, you big baby?”
you grunted in the embrace
“stop calling me that”
he laughs again
“let’s get you inside before people gets the wrong impression, okay?”
you nodded slowly
when you two were inside, you had already calmed down
“actually, y/n”
he paused, for suspense
“i’ve liked you way longer than you did - so jaehyun one, y/n zero, by the way - i’ve liked you since we were 15″
you’re dumbfounded
not only did he made this a competition, but he also feels... the... same way...?
plus
how can someone like someone for that long
“when we were assigned to sit next to each other, you refused to talk to me, so i had to do something. so i stole your school supplies to get you to talk to me”
your jaw dropped
“you’re literally crazy” you joked
the tensed air between you quickly disappeared as he laughed at you
“i know… i was desperate”
there was silence again as you two looked at each other, and then laughing again
you missed this
jaehyun missed this, too
“i’m glad sicheng rejected you when we were 17, by the way, or else i wouldn’t have you crying at my doorstep like you did just now”
“you’re literally so annoying”
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buckyodinson · 5 years ago
Note
How about fluff with Catfish x Reader inspired by the song, "Lovesick" by All About Maggie.
Thank you for requesting! I’ve been in my Catfish feels for a while now and it was nice to write something for him! 💛
I veered a little bit from the song because this took a bit of an angsty turn before all the fluff, but I hope you enjoy!
-
You and Frankie were best friends throughout high school and college. You’ve been pretty much attached at the hip the whole time you’ve known one another. Even when he went off and served in the special forces, you still kept in contact as much as you could, and whenever he was back, he’d come to see you and stay with you for a little while before leaving again. You met the boys a few times too, and they were all hilarious, and you grew close to them over the years too.
As you got older, the pair of you grew even closer, relying on the other as a source of comfort for any troubles you were going through. The biggest of these was when he started using and his licence was revoked. That night, he knocked on your apartment door, and as soon as you opened it, he all but collapsed into your arms, sobbing. He admitted the stress of the job had gotten to him badly, and he made a mistake and it just went downhill. You held him as he cried, and you reminded him that you were always there for him, no matter what. That you were going to help clean him up. That he didn’t need the drugs, when you were always going to be there when he needed something to distract him from the job.
After that night, you made him move in with you for the foreseeable future and you helped get him back on his feet, and he was starting to feel better. And being with him for such an extended period made your teenage crush on Frankie come back in full swing. It didn’t help that you slept in the same bed, either. Since you only had a one-bedroom apartment, and neither of you were in a financial position for anything more, you had to make do with the one bed while he stayed with you. The bed was big enough, sure, but waking up in the morning and having Frankie right there next to you, hair sticking in every which way and snoring lightly made you feel like you were 16 again.
You’d loved Frankie since the day you met him, and nothing had changed since that day. You still felt exactly the same as that first day, and you knew you always would. Despite the awful things he went through in the special forces, Frankie grew softer as he aged, and it only made him more attractive to you. And having him living with you now made it all the worse. Seeing this domestic side to him had you feeling all types of ways. And a few instances had you wondering if he maybe held the same feeling back for you.
After about a week of him moving in with you, you awoke one morning to find Frankie spooning you. He had an arm wrapped tightly around your waist, and your back was pressed to his stomach. You blushed profusely and managed to pry yourself from his grip and quietly get out of bed. You were always an affectionate pair, and physical contact was always there. You were always hugging and sharing seats, and even back in college when he’d come visit you, you’d stay in the same bed too. But this was different. This felt so intimate. But you put it down to him having a warm body next to him for the first time in god knows how long.
Then you went with Frankie to meet with the boys for the first time in a few years, and when he told them he was living with you, you couldn’t help but notice some of the looks the guys gave each other. For ex-special forces, they sure weren’t subtle. That got you thinking a little more, but you put it down to wishful thinking.
What finally did it for you was a night you woke up in the early hours of the morning and noticed the bed was empty beside you. You padded quietly to the living room where Frankie was sprawled over the sofa, on the phone to someone. He had a hand over his face as he spoke, so didn’t notice you stood in the doorway, and when you heard what he was saying, you stepped back and listened out of his view.
“Come on, Santi. I can’t. She’s my best friend.... Yeah, well what if you’re wrong? I can’t risk it, man. She means too much to me. If I fucked this up, I’d never forgive myself. She’d never see me that way, man. She’d have said something by now if she felt the same!.... yeah I know I haven’t, but I’m a pussy! She’s the bravest fucking woman I’ve ever met. And she deserves someone better than me.”
Your heart sank as you heard the way he spoke about himself, but his words, and what you assume was a grilling from Santi on the other end of the line confirmed that your feelings were reciprocated. You heard him say goodbye to Santi and you rushed back to bed quietly, tucking yourself back under the sheets and pretending to be asleep as you heard his footsteps padding down the hallway as he came back to bed.
He slowly lowered himself into bed, and you tried your best to even out your breathing as he moved about, pulling the sheets over himself, and you were doing a pretty good job of pretending to be asleep until he reached a hand out to touch your exposed shoulder and you flinched slightly.
“Are you awake?” he whispered.
“...yeah.” you replied after a pause and turned to face him, just about seeing his features in the dark of the room.
“Did I wake you up?” he asked softly.
“No, it’s fine. You know my body hates me and decides to wake me at all hours of the night.”
“Oh, good. Well, not good, but good that it wasn’t me- you know what I mean.” he sighs and you chuckle at his exasperated tone.
You lay there in silence for a few minutes, and you have an internal battle about bringing it up or not, but it’s eating you alive, and now you know he feels the same, you just want to ask him.
“How’s Santi?” you ask abruptly.
“He’s alri- wait, what?” It dawned on him that you could only be asking if you heard him on the phone. He prays you didn’t hear the last little bit of his call.
“I heard you on the phone, Frankie.” He could tell from your tone that you’d heard what he hoped you hadn’t.
There’s a pause and a very quiet “Fuck...” falls from his lips in response, and he flops onto his back, staring at the ceiling before he speaks again.
“Listen, if you heard what I think you heard...shit... if you want me to leave, I can.”
“Frankie, I don’t want that.” you reached out and placed your hand on his cheek, pulling his face so he’s looking at you.
“But-” he goes to speak but you lean forward and press your lips against his to silence him.
He’s frozen in his place and you pull back, “I feel the same, Frankie.”
“You do?” he sounds breathless.
“Do I need to kiss you again?”
“...maybe?” you hear his smirk and you lean in again, and he kisses you back this time, and he’s so gentle. You almost want to cry that you’ve been deprived of his kiss for so long. Of him for so long.
He pulls back this time, but reaches to pull your body closer to his, “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”
“If it’s anywhere near as long as I have too, then I might have an idea.” you bury your head in his chest and he pulls you even closer to him.
“And don’t ever say you’re not deserving of love, Francisco Morales. You deserve everything.”
“That’s what Santi said.” he chuckled lowly as he presses a kiss to the top of your head.
“He’s a smart man.”
“Let’s not go that far. And definitely don’t tell him you said that.”
You laughed into his chest, “I love you Frankie. I always have.”
“Since we were kids?” his voice falters a little.
“Since we were kids.” you repeated back to him, looking up at him.
“Me too... God, what a waste. Think of all the time we could have been together if we hadn’t been a pair of idiots.” he captures your lips once more.
“We’ve got each other now.” you whisper against his lips when you pull away.
“Yeah... and I love you too.”
“I know.”
He shuffles onto his back again, you tucked securely into his side, and he lets a few tears escape his eyes once he feels your breathing even out. He’d driven himself crazy all these years with self-loathing and feelings of worthlessness, and you’d always been there for him. You were his rock, and now he knew you felt the same, he’d never stop telling you how much he loved you. He couldn’t believe his luck. He soon fell asleep, and it was the best damn night’s sleep he’d had in years.
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niphredil-14 · 5 years ago
Text
Vincent/MC -- Caught
Thanks, @sadshaxk​ for requesting this. Sorry that it took so long, all the writing I had got deleted and I had to restart.  Pairing: Vincent/MC Genre: Smut Warnings: NSFW, Being walked in on
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It started like all things do, innocently. We had simply been cuddling, enjoying the warmth, safety, and comfort of each others’ arms. He had his arms wrapped around my waist, and his chest was pressed to my back, with his nose snugly secured in my hair. It was only when I went to adjust, that I accidentally pushed against him, and his arms tightened around my waist, and his face was pushed farther into my hair, muffling his groan. Noticing his sexual distress, I decided to roll my hips backward once more. And yet again, Vincent had a strong reaction. His arms grew even tighter around my torse, and his lips moved to my jaw, pressing kisses over every inch, as I felt a growl rumbling in his chest.            “Vincent, are you alright?” I asked innocently, turning my head back to him. He groaned, then lifted his face to look me in the eye.            “You really have no idea what you’re doing to me.” He whispered, gripping my hips with such fervor it was almost suffocating. I turned, placed my hand on his chest, and slowly let it trail itself down towards his pelvis, all while blinking seductively and whispering,            “Oh, I know exactly what I’m doing to you, baby,” as I watched him become closer and closer to losing control just from foreplay. My dominance was not long-lasting, and before I knew it, Vincent was straddling my hips and holding my hands above my head with only one of his, as his other stripped him of his shirt, letting me see his chiseled chest, heaving with his frantic breathing. The look in his eyes was electrifying; his blue orbs seemed to be glowing as they bared his thoughts to me, showing his arousal and lust.            “MC, I love you, but right now, you are really asking for it,” Vincent said, leaning down to whisper into my ear, and then proceeding to lick the shell, my not-so-secret sweet spot. I was, unfortunately, incapable of suppressing my moan as I arched my back and turned my head to expose my neck and leave it vulnerable to his hoped for and expected further attacks. My loving boyfriend didn’t disappoint, and soon, he was leaving sloppy kisses all along my neck, giving me a little nip here and there every so often, while I struggled to free my hands so that I could hold him, as I so desperately wanted to. However, my desire for more freedom was turned down as Vincent only held my wrists tighter. “Hm? What’s this? You seduce and tease me, but then you’re upset when it’s my turn? That’s not fair, MC.” Vincent seemed to be in one of his rare sadistic moods, and I knew that there was only one way to get what I wanted when my dear Vince was like this, and though it hurt my pride, I would do anything to touch him at that moment.           “Vincent, my love, my one and only,” I began. “I’m sorry for teasing you, I’ve learned my lesson, so please let me touch you,” I begged, hoping that it would work. But alas, I should have thought of the consequences before provoking him.            “But MC, I love how you look while you’re desperate. You’re just too cute.” Vincent responded.            “Then at least hurry up! Please, I can’t stand this!” I moaned, willing to anything just to have myself relieved. It seemed as though this request of mine pleased Vincent, and before I could process what was happening, I was lifted into the air and pressed against the wall with my legs wrapped around Vincent’s waist keeping me in mid-air. No words were exchanged as Vincent roughly grasped at my chest while kissing me deeply, shoving his tongue down my throat, absorbing my monas into his mouth, all the while he was grinding against me even harder and faster than before. Only a moment later, he had ripped off any clothes that were still, for some reason, adorning our aroused bodies. I was given no warning as he promptly shoved the entirety of his length into my hole, and bit down on my neck, sucking the red sustenance from my veins. His thrusts were hard and fast and made me feel as though I was going to be split in half. I could feel and register nothing but the wonderous, euphoric effect my lover had on me. My climax was getting nearer and nearer, just as my moans were beginning to be heard just past my hand, that was trying to the best of its ability to muffle my wanton noises. Just as I was reaching my peak, I heard the door
SLAM.
          “Broer, are you alri-” Theo slammed the door open, and began to shout before seeing the position his dear older brother had me in. Vincent was quick to cover me, but that didn’t cause his younger brother to unsee him working me to my climax.            “Hello, Theo.” Vincent greeted, seemingly fine with our obvious nudity.            “Hi Vincent, MC.” Theo replied. I only managed to give a slight wave in response to Theo’s salutation. The tension in the air was as palpable as Vincent’s still-twitching cock inside of me, and neither Theo nor Vincent nor I had the guts to move. That is, until, Theo had felt awkward enough to clear his throat, apologize, then leave. Neither Vincent nor I felt horny in the slightest after having been caught in the act and settled for putting our clothes back on and cuddling.
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the-weeping-monk · 4 years ago
Text
visions are seldom all they seem (but i know you)
Chapter 2
previous-next/find on ao3
“I’m going to kill that child. The one who shot my Nimue,” Merlin snarled.
“You will?” Morgana paused, an odd, ethereal feeling overtaking her. It was almost like a sixth sense, something she had not had before she became . . . well, whatever this state of being was. At that moment, she believed the wizard in front of her. But Merlin’s resolve wasn’t the thing that made her believe him, rather it was a sense of foreboding, a prickling at the base of her spine. “Yes,” she continued, “I suppose you will.”
With his strike of lightning, Merlin had brought them to his old tower. Morgana had been uneasy with the thought of being discovered, but the wizard had only chuckled darkly.
“Uther won’t be able to face these rooms any time soon,” he had said. “Not after what he did to me.”
Morgana had raised an eyebrow. “You give his conscience a great deal of credit.”
“Perhaps,” Merlin had shrugged, “but I would like to think all of my years have taught me a thing or two on how to read people.”
Now Morgana stared out of one of the tower’s windows, contemplating all that had happened, analyzing Nimue’s final moments. Merlin paced the room, mumbling about revenge and wiping furiously at stray tears. Morgana pretended not to notice, pretended not to notice how she did not share in his grief.
Something wasn’t right. She felt every death as if it were her own, but she had not felt Nimue’s. It was strange, but perhaps the shock hadn’t worn off yet. She had screamed and cried when Iris had shot Nimue, but now she felt numb, as if she wasn’t quite attached to her feelings. Perhaps she would feel different once she accepted Nimue’s death.
Morgana frowned against the thought. She still could not shake the instinctual sense that something was amiss.
“You said that you know the woman who came before me,” Morgana started, breaking the tense silence.
Merlin turned to face her. “Yes,” he said, quiet. “I did. She and I . . . we were old friends.”
Morgana fiddled with her hands, contemplating how to properly phrase her next question. “Did she say anything about how it felt when someone died? Did she feel every death? Or only some?”
She knew that she was toeing a line, knew that if she was not careful, Merlin would figure out what she meant by her seemingly innocent question. He might have been an unreliable drunkard, but that did not mean he wasn’t smart.
Merlin studied her a moment before replying. “She did not tell me much, though I do know she felt every single death that occurred under her jurisdiction.”
That gave Morgana pause. “‘Under her jurisdiction?’” she parroted back.
Nodding, Merlin said, “There are many Daughters of Death. To have only one entity responsible for deaths all over the world is simply improbable—thousands of people could be on the brink of death at once, so of course there would need to be more than one Daughter accountable for them.
"The Daughters of Death, as I know, are separated into regions. The higher the population, the busier they are. The more deaths they would feel.” He frowned. “The Widow did not tell me much of what it felt like to carry the burden of so much death, but I do know that she felt every single departure.”
Morgana pursed her lips. Was Nimue not under her jurisdiction? Was that why she had not felt her death?
Finally, she said, “I see. That makes sense.”
Except for the fact that it didn’t make sense, not where Nimue was concerned. But Morgana couldn’t pry more for fear that Merlin would figure out what she was really asking, and she couldn’t do that to him. She couldn’t give him hope that Nimue was still alive.
“What else can I do now that I am . . .” Morgana gestured at herself, unsure what to make of her new self.
Merlin moved to stand next to her at the window, silent for a few moments as he gazed down at the sea below them. The waves lapped against the shore calmly, belying the horror of the day.
When Merlin spoke, he was looking out into the distance. Morgana would have found it a tad dramatic, had she not realized it was the action of a man who was shipwrecked and lost at sea. It was the action of one who had lost everything and was trying to pick up the pieces from the wreckage.
Guilt crept up her throat. Merlin’s behavior was yet another reminder that she did not feel his loss or pain or agony. Was this the rest of her life? Was she to be devoid of any and all human emotion? Had her empathy departed with her human life?
Morgana turned her face away.
“You, like the Widow and the other Daughters, can travel far distances in mere seconds.” He smiled grimly. “Though, I suppose you already knew that.”
Morgana nodded, still unable to meet his eyes. Being able to teleport was freeing—she could go anywhere, no longer tied down by earthly laws. Though she grieved for her old life, she was learning to enjoy the perks of this new one.
But her sole duty was to take life for the rest of eternity. She could not, in good conscience, enjoy anything about this situation. It wasn’t right.
“Most believe that the Daughters are unable to make contact with the physical world as if they are mere ghosts or apparitions,” Merlin said, shaking his head. “They are wrong. Just because you are no longer human doesn’t mean that you can’t do human things, per se.”
Morgana finally met his gaze. “Like what?”
His eyes gleamed. It took Morgana aback; it was the only emotion other than sorrow that he had shown all day.
“You can travel anywhere in the world and experience things the rest of us cannot. You are no longer limited by your mortal body, Morgana,” he said, a tinge of awe in his voice. “But you can also be human, in the sense that you can enjoy the simple things. You can enjoy the beauty of a sunset or the peace of the ocean.”
Morgana looked out to the sea once more, but instead of taking in its beauty, all she felt was the death inside of it. She could sense the decay on the ocean floor, could feel the life seeping out of a shark’s prey. Nothing about the ocean was beautiful anymore.
It was yet another piece of her human life she would be forced to mourn. She wished that she had not killed the Widow, now more than ever. Morgana would never again be able to enjoy the sun on her face or the tickle of an ocean breeze. She would never be able to look past the death that clung to every living thing.
Morgana would have to suffer through an eternity of this unless someone was kind enough to kill her and foolish enough to take her place.
It was suddenly difficult to breathe. She forced air into her lungs, blinked rapidly. Panic was the only word to describe what she was experiencing.
Eternity, eternity, eternity. The word rattled inside her head. Forever forever foreverforeverforever.
Morgana needed to get out of this room, she needed a distraction.
She stumbled back from the window, knowing where she needed to go. There were so many things she could not control, but she could get closure.
Merlin turned to her, worry etched on his countenance. “Morgana, are you alri—”
“I have to go,” she said at once, and vanished.
. . .
The wind howled through the rocky pass, buffeting against Nimue’s stolen robes. She clutched one of the Red Paladins’ swords in her fist, as if it would give her strength to push forward. She had had the foresight to grab it, knowing that she should be prepared for anything once she arrived at the beach, unsure of what she would find there.
Nimue knew that it was foolish to hope, but she did anyway. Even if King Uther had not betrayed her, once he discovered that she had escaped, there was a chance he would nullify their agreement and order the Fey charter ships to be sunk.
A chill seized her spine at the thought of the watery depths of sea pulling Arthur and Pym down, down, down. Even with magic, Nimue had almost drowned. If King Uther wished it, her friends would not stand a chance.
Nimue pushed herself into a jog, mindful of her footing—fallen rocks littered the path before her. One wrong move, and she could trip and fall into the abyss below.
A twig snapped behind her, and Nimue whirled, sword at the ready, only to lower it a moment later.
“Morgana?” she asked, relief flooding her veins.
Morgana merely stared at her, awe and incredulity shining in her eyes as if she could not believe that this moment was real. Only after she fully accepted the situation, did a huge grin break out onto her face. She rushed forward to embrace her friend, and Nimue’s sword clattered to the ground in anticipation.
“We thought you were dead,” Morgana breathed into Nimue’s hair. “Merlin was so worried—”
“Merlin.” Nimue pulled back from the hug but kept her hands on Morgana’s shoulders. “How is he?”
“Alive. Now that he has his magic back, his wounds are healed.” Morgana’s small smile contorted suddenly. “But, oh God, Nimue—he was so worried—”
“You must let him know that I’m alright,” Nimue said, adamant. “At once.”
“I will, don’t worry, but,” Morgana’s eyes tightened, “how did you even survive? You took two arrows straight to the chest, Nimue.”
Nimue smiled softly. “Merlin helped me.” When Morgana’s brows furrowed in question, Nimue hurried to explain. “Well, not physically, but back at the abandoned palace, he taught me how to  control the Hidden. I made fruit grow from a barren tree—I figured that creation was not far off from healing.” She shrugged. “It was worth a shot.”
“You truly are the rightful Queen of the Fey.” Morgana smiled, not attempting to hide the pride in her voice.
Nimue chuckled dryly. “I almost drowned. That sounds like too simple a death for a queen.” Morgana opened her mouth to object, but Nimue continued. “I feel as if my time as the Fey Queen was only a dream. It doesn’t feel real, anyway.”
Eyes softening, Morgana said, “Nimue, you have conquered wolves and Red Paladins and now you have conquered Death herself. You are the rightful queen who has walked away from every battle victorious. You rose from the lake stronger than you were before.”
Nimue couldn’t help the small smile that pulled at her lips. “You are a good friend, Morgana. I’m lucky to have you by my side.”
“And you’ll always have me,” Morgana replied, pulling Nimue into another hug.
The two girls stayed like that for moments on end, simply enjoying the other’s presence. It seemed as if it had been an eternity since they had felt safe, but they both knew that it wouldn’t last. There was a war to win and Fey to save. It was only when Nimue knew she could stall no longer did she retreat from her friend’s embrace.
“I should get going. Who knows what happened to the Fey while I was gone.” Nimue retrieved her stolen sword from the ground, frowning at its weight. Unlike the Sword of Power, this one was heavy and unbalanced, an impediment rather than an extension of herself. She had half a mind to ask Morgana to retrieve the Sword of Power from Merlin, but decided against it. She would make do with what she had for now.
“What do you want me to do?” Morgana asked.
Nimue’s brow furrowed. “You are a harbinger of death,” she said, incredulous. “You take orders from no one but yourself.”
At that, Morgana’s smile turned grim. “Ah. That.”
“You haven’t accepted your new life.” It was more of a statement than a question, and Morgana’s expression only served to confirm Nimue’s suspicions. “You must move on, Morgana,” Nimue continued. “It took me a long time to accept who I was. If I had done it sooner, I could have saved a lot of people.”
I could have saved my mother, she thought but didn't say.
Morgana’s eyes hardened. Donned in black drapery, she was a fierce sight to behold. “I can’t save anyone. You don’t understand what this—this curse is.” She turned away to glare into the abyss below, face stony. “For the rest of eternity, until someone kills me, I am to make a living out of murder.”
“I used to think my powers were a curse, too, you know,” Nimue said, though not unkindly.
Morgana only shook her head. “Maybe so, but you’re not the one forced to take lives—I am.”
“That’s not what I—”
“I am a Daughter of Death, Nimue,” Morgana snapped, whirling on her. “I am a soul-stealer and a monster, all because I allowed Cailleach to get in my head.” Her teeth were bared, though Nimue suspected that if Morgana was mad, it was at no one but herself. “I knew that Celia died in that fire, I knew that. And yet I still fell for Cailleach’s pretty visions and empty promises.”
“None of that is your fault,” Nimue pacified. “She’s an ancient, powerful being that preyed upon your love for Celia. Do not blame yourself.”
“How can I not? All of this is my fault,” Morgana’s voice broke at the end. “You don’t understand. No one can.”
“Let me try. Please.”
But Morgana only turned away. “I should let Merlin know that you’re alright.”
“Morgana, wait—”
But Morgana was already gone.
Nimue closed her eyes, mad at the world, angry at herself. She should not have brought up Morgana’s new life without thinking of the consequences. Before, when Morgana had rescued her, she had seemed fine with what she had become, had taken it in stride. But Nimue now knew that she had been mistaken.
Morgana was excellent in high-pressure situations—Nimue had seen it in how she reeled in her emotions and focused on the task at hand. She did not let her feelings get in the way of what needed to be done, but Nimue had mistaken that for complacency.
Oh, how wrong she had been.
It was then that Nimue heard it—horse hooves clopping atop the stone bridge. She froze, but quickly came to her senses and shifted into a fighting stance, sword at the ready.
The clopping of the horse was slow and unbothered as if the rider was taking their sweet time. As if no one was after her, as if someone just happened along this path accidentally.
Nimue didn’t buy it.
She could feel the magic thrumming in her veins, could hear the whispers of the Hidden urging her to unleash their power. It would be entirely too easy to make the bridge collapse in on itself.
The whispers reached a crescendo, Nimue called upon the magic—
And promptly stopped.
Because there, in front of her on a horse, sat a boy whom she had never thought she would see again.
“Squirrel?” gasped Nimue, disbelieving.
The boy’s eyes widened comically and a blinding smile broke out over his face. “Nimue!” He scrambled off of the horse, and it was only then that Nimue realized that there was a second rider helping him down.
Nimue’s grip tightened on her sword, but she was careful to make sure the blade didn’t touch Squirrel as he ran into her waiting arms. She pulled him in tight, her eyes not once leaving the second figure. Hugging the boy closer to her chest, Nimue stared down the man who had overseen the burning of her village, the man who had slain innocent Fey that had aided her when no one else would.
The Weeping Monk met her gaze cooly, betraying nothing. His hood was down, and his crystal blue eyes studied her as if he was not sure what to make of her.
Nimue stood abruptly and shoved Squirrel behind her as gently as she could, directing her fury at the Monk. “I don’t know what you’re doing here with Squirrel, but you need to leave. Now,” she snarled. “I have half a mind to kill you where you stand.”
Squirrel stilled behind her.
The Monk’s face was impassive. “I do not doubt it.”
“Then why are you still here? I make good on my threats.” She raised her sword higher for good measure.
Before he could respond, Squirrel darted out from behind Nimue and positioned himself between her sword and the Monk. Nimue opened her mouth to tell him to get back, but before she could, the boy continued. “Don’t hurt him, Nimue. Lancelot saved me from the Red Paladins. He’s good now.”
“Oh?” Her question was aimed at Squirrel, though her eyes remained on the Monk. “And why would he do that?”
The Monk spoke then, voice even. “I was wrong,” he said simply. “I couldn’t continue to follow Father Carden’s orders anymore. It wasn’t right.”
“I’m so glad you’ve come to this conclusion now, when there are only a handful of Fey left that you didn’t murder in cold blood,” Nimue spat.
The Monk didn’t say anything for a moment. Something flickered in his gaze—pain, perhaps, or sadness. Or maybe it was guilt.
Nimue shook off the notion. Men like him felt no guilt or remorse for the things they did. She would not make him out to be anything other than the heartless murderer he was.
Something in her eyes must have betrayed her feelings, for the next words that the Monk spoke were, “I see you are resolute in your judgment of my character.” He paused. “I can assure you that you are mistaken.”
“I know everything I need to know about you,” Nimue hissed.
“You do?” the Monk said, his voice almost patronizing. It made her blood boil.
Her tone was clipped. “Yes.”
There was silence for a few moments, and then, “Why do you suppose I left the Red Paladins?”
“Maybe you got tired of taking orders, or maybe you thought you could exterminate the Fey faster on your own.” She shrugged. “I don’t care because I do not believe a word out of your mouth. Nothing you could say would make me trust you. Ever .”
The Monk nodded as if he accepted her declaration, but the gesture only served to antagonize her further.
Nimue stepped around Squirrel, ignoring his protests as she leveled her sword at the Monk. The tip of the blade was inches from his heart. The Hidden shouted in her head, screamed for his blood. They wanted him to hurt, and she was more than happy to oblige.
The Monk merely stared at the blade. Was that a look of boredom, or of something else, something darker?
Nimue did not care to deliberate on it further, so she spoke instead, voice icy. “I will give you five seconds to leave this place or I will carve out your heart, here and now. Do you understand me?”
He did not respond, but his eyes met hers and she was suddenly struck by how hollow they were. It was as if the fire inside of him had been snuffed out.
The Monk turned his attention behind her to where Squirrel stood, silent. “It seems we will not be able to continue our lessons.”
Nimue tamped down her curiosity and watched the Monk carefully as he backed away from her blade.
“Remember what we talked about, Percival,” he said, his words directed at Squirrel.
“You know I don’t—”
Somehow, the Monk’s voice was soft. “I know. But it is still your name.”
Something passed between the two, an understanding of sorts. Squirrel nodded, resigned, and he said nothing more.
There was no mistaking it this time—there was genuine regret in the Monk’s eyes as he made his way to his horse.
Nimue did not think that the Monk was capable of anything other than violence. It was most likely a trick, an act to get her to take pity on him, to show her that he could be redeemed.
He has killed countless Fey, a voice in her head whispered. He watched as your village went up in flames.
She could not afford to take pity on a murderer.
Nimue watched, her sword still raised in his direction, as the Monk made his way back to his horse. He had a limp, she realized, and it appeared as though it was a struggle for him to get atop the saddle.
The words were out before she could stop them. “What happened?” She was not sure why she asked or why she even cared, but perhaps her curiosity was stronger than she had thought.
The Monk stared at her for a moment before he spoke, his jaw working. “I was injured in a fight with the Trinity Guard before Percival and I escaped,” was all he said.
“Oh.” Nimue paused, and the silence stretched on.
He waited for her to continue, almost as if he knew that there was more she wanted to say.
“I can’t trust you,” she said finally.
His voice was solemn as he said, “I know.”
“Ok.” A beat. “You may travel with us, but if you so much as make one move against me or Squirrel, I will make good on my threat to disembowel you where you stand.”
The Monk blinked at her, even as Squirrel exclaimed, “Really? You’re going to let him come with us?”
Nimue turned back to the boy. “I do not trust him enough to go off on his own and not alert the Red Paladins of our location.”
It was not entirely the reason, but it seemed to satisfy Squirrel. She looked back up at the Monk and fixed him with a sharp look. “Let’s head out.”
“Where are we going?” asked Squirrel.
“To find the Fey.”
25 notes · View notes