#i honestly feel like im suffocating because im scared im never going to feel okay again

[peachyfloral]

reminder to myself that it's okay and normal to be sad 🌹🌸🌷🌼🌻

[heavysighing-dreamyeyes]

Ooooommmmgggg i love golden chain! Its so good, Jason keeps getting more and more toxic towards us, suffocating us but he doesn’t care because we have him and what else could we need? I just know he was seething at seeing replacement Robin there, trying to take you away from HIM and i KNOW seeing Batman trying to save you didn’t help anything.

Batman sending Robin there means that he either knew where we were and was jut waiting for a time to strike or Jason had slipped up somewhere, doesn’t matter now bc now he’s kept you away from Batman again and AAAAAAAAA the small parallels between how Joker treated Jason to how Jason keeps us. Snatched up under Batman’s nose, kept secluded in a place no one would expect, Jason giving you that necklace and being gentle but firm that you keep it on, like how he can’t escape his own brand you can’t escape Jasons love obsession, and even eventually chaining us to a chair after escaping Batman? Love it, he’s awful he’s never letting us go, Joker won’t leave him even if he’s dead and by god Jason will make sure it’s the same way with us

He also definitely didn’t let our friends Krystal, Destini, and Robbi live, trying to warn us like that? They’re dead im so sorry my lovelies hes crazy

Also BEAAAANNN please tell me he’s ok the poor little baby kitty don’t let harm befall him he’s innocent, i love your writing, if u continue this (and don’t feel pressured to!) i just wish for bean to be ok our little meow

Ah, nonnie!! I literally read this so many times!! I'm so glad you liked it! Omg, I'm actually smiling so wide! Thank you for taking the time to send this! 🥰🥰

Between you and me, I do plan on continuing the series, I don't have too much written down for it right now, but I'm planning on calling it A Glass City.

I'm so thrilled people picked up on the parallels between how Jason's treating you and how he was treated! It's angsty, and I actually made myself unwell over it.

I'm more or less following the games timeline, and right now, Batman has no idea who the Arkham Knight is. What Batman does know is that the Arkham Knight kidnapped Jason's best friend.

Batman thinks it's a way to get under his skin and show his failure over not saving his last Robin. He has no idea that you being taken has nothing to do with him and everything to do with you.

Robin being the one to save you was pure coincidence. (On Batman's part, intentional on mine) Bruce, again, has no idea that you're important to the Knight. He had no idea that AK was going to drop everything to get to you, because he assumed you were just a tiny part of the game.

Robin was the convenient one to send, and it definitely made Jason more volatile than he would have been if Nightwing went instead. (He probably wouldn't have jumped off a building with you)

Some light spoilers under the cut about Bean and your three friends:

Bean is okay and will return in chapter four!

Krystal, Destini, and Robbi are alive, I SWEAR, but he definitely scared them. Jason knows you like them, and it would only be a problem if he killed them.

Honestly, they've been really nice to you, and he knows they make you happy. If anything, he wants them to keep doing their job after this all blows over. (If he gets his way and wins)

[compassionatereminders]

hi, i hope its okay if i vent here cause i know shits been rough for you lately (wishing you the best btw, which ik simply saying that doesnt magically make things better but hope yk what i mean)

i sent an asks a few months ago about having empathy for someone for the first time and really struggling to come to terms with it, how to deal with new overwhelming emotions and the like (i believe i also mentioned them being in an abusive situation at the time, which was a whole other complicated feeling to empathize with someones pain and to take it internally on levels i had never experienced or was capable of fathoming before in my entire life)

currently struggling with that person again, they left their original abusive situation but have entered a new complex one, as this person isnt intentionally shitty but they're rich, white passing and extremely privileged and out of touch, like truly they don't grasp my friends trauma and why it makes things hard for them (friend has gone through severe abuse and childhood trauma, neglect and homelessness just to say the light ones, its truly awful what they've been through) despite having some trauma of their own and i truly fucking despise them with my entire being

my friend is abusing alcohol and debating killing themselves due to this person dangling ending their relationship over my friends head --- (which is another thing thats complex and hurting, my friend never told me they were dating which like they totally dont have to obviously!! but they continuously insisted to me they were only friends, before suddenly revealing through a screenshot of their partners text that they were together, which they did with their previous abuser so like having it happen twice was icky feeling for some reason despite the fact ik they don't owe me that information at all, i dont care they hid it i just feel hurt and confused if i had done something to warrant not being trusted with that information but thats a whole other can of worms) --- due to them struggling to do something the person wants, because my friend has trauma what the person is requesting is hard and my friends explained why its hard and hurts them, they've thrown up daily from the stress and this person knows that but somehow doesnt grasp why its causing my friend such distress

i feel utterly suffocated by the entire situation and its put my life on full stop because i cant just leave my friend to deal with this themselves, but theres nothing i can say or do that can help them because they're deeply in love and won't break up with their partner even though the stress is physically ruining them. i feel hopeless and unable to do anything, i encourage them to talk to me because really i wanna be there for them but i feel so scared all the time that somethings gonna happen to them which makes me need to listen even more because their other friend is horribly abusive and contributed to their trauma, so i don't wanna leave my friend alone. i don't know how to deal with empathizing with their pain and not being able to stop it feels like its killing me cause now im also throwing up multiple times a day, genuinely debating drug relapse to cope with it all and i can't sleep properly anymore and only sleep on specific 4 hour intervals throughout the day next to my phone so i can be on constant standby for the friend and i know its not healthy and if they knew it was like this they'd never tell me whats wrong again (which i really dont want i truly honest to god wanna be there for them), i feel like no matter how i go about it theres no winning in this situation and honestly i wanna die from it all which sounds so silly cause my friend is going through SO much worse and here i am going waaah this hurts me!! i just eugh, i don't know what to do. which i guess i know what to do, but i don't wanna do any of it i've never cared about someone like i care about them and the thought of leaving them to sort it out themselves feels like the end of the world, even though i know they're also a sociopath and don't feel empathy towards me which is also a new shitty feeling cause now i know how people feel around me. this is exhausting i don't know how people with empathy deal with it especially you kat!! if i remember correctly you mentioned being very empathetic, it's amazing you're able to handle having empathy and running a blog where people often dump stuff in your inbox (which uh is the very same thing im doing now, sorry!) ok i got it all out of my system i'm gonna go take a nap and hope the problem is solved tomorrow (it wont be but a bitch can hope!!) thank you for being a space where i could word vomit my brain out, i really hope things get better for you and that your eye gets sorted out <3

No matter how unwell your friend is, you're allowed to have boundaries and limits. And while I get the desire to be there and do everything you can because you care about your friend, you will not be able to continue pouring from an empty vessel. This is not a sustainable situation. You neglecting yourself and not sleeping and getting physically ill and wanting to die is not an acceptable consequence of your friend being in a toxic relationship without being able to change their situation. I know you didn't ask for advice, but I strongly encourage you to establish some boundaries here and stand by them. You do not lose your right to have boundaries when a loved one is mentally unwell and if you do not prioritize your own mental well-being, you will not be able to continue being there for you friend

[bbotan]

any beard/jacket hcs? romantic or just bros, your choice :-)

ahhh i love beard lol, him and jacket are such a great duo too ! thank you for the request as always :)

hmm,,, romantic sounds interesting, might write for both

Beard x Jacket headcanons (romantic + platonic hcs!)

both under the cut :-]

Beard x Jacket romantic headcanons [SFW]

(okay i know thats richards head sprite but....i still think of jacket as chicken man)

Honestly? Things didn't even change that much between them even after they both admitted their feelings for each other. It still very much felt and looked like a bromance which wasn't too far off from how it was before. They knew they genuinely loved each other which was comforting enough so no need (in their opinions) to announce to everyone.

Jacket had a tough time coming to terms about actually being in love with the other, it wasn't out of any type of homophobia but he was scared to go into another relationship since the passing of girlfriend. He didn't want to lose another person close to him, even after all these years he didn't feel confident that the coast was clear. He knew if his friend got hurt because of him then he'd never forgive himself.

Beard always felt something romantic for Jacket but kept it hidden because he thought it was just misunderstood platonic feelings and not that he actually wants to hold this man, kiss and keep him safe. Either way he was just thankful to be such good friends with Jacket with the bond they've grown to have.

It was such a relief after they weren't being suffocated by their growing feelings for each other anymore, but they didn't really know where to take it after that. It felt good that they had mutual feelings but they still enjoyed just acting like bros, romantic bros it might be but what did it matter? They loved each other and that's all that they cared about.

Beard and Jacket being bros headcanons!

These two, with all the shit they've been through? inseparable. They might not call or talk every single day but that doesn't mean they're not the absolute best of friends. They hang out whenever they have get the slightest opportunity to since they're still both relatively busy men with their own jobs and all.

Jacket shows a lot less emotion than the other but Beard still tries to make it known to his friend that if he needs a shoulder to cry on then he's always available, Beard still has yet to be taken up on that offer.

One of their favorite places to hang out and shoot the shit is actually the arcade, they may be grown-ass men but holy shit do they love it. Beard used to work at one [part of the hc im not saying this is canon LOL] so he knows all the tricks and has even, on occasion, opened up some of the games to cheat his way through it for more tickets. Jacket is an absolute god at them, rigged or not, so he doesn't need the cheats. he tries to avoid the sports-centered games that have you hit things with a bat.

-----

thank you for the ask !! i got a little shorthanded on ideas for the just bros section so i hope its okay : ] thank youuuuuuu !

[badnew2005]

rehashing this post from right before s15 like. hm !!!!! first half of the post died like hoodie gate and dennis in macs room turned to be Nothing. i’m still maintaining they fucked over quarantine (SINGING HAPPY SILLY LITTLE COUNTRY LOVE SONGS ?????? country mac vs mac) but. dennis is still emotionally in north dakota. he’s still fight or flight. he’s learnt he can’t survive without mac without the gang and still had to come crawling back to philly But he’s not emotionally back. he’s not accepted he’s back and this is Who He Is. that he couldn’t survive as someone else once again. he’s terrified mac and the gang can see through him. he still wants to run. the gang go on holiday. go where PURPLE ??? that’s not a place !!! vocal stim of all time. they go to ireland back to their Roots. they’re an Irish bar. macs so aggressively american irish. let’s tell him he’s dutch. to shut him up. need to confuse him, spin him around, give him a different focus other than Me.

mac and dennis barely interact in ireland. dennis’ obsession with authenticity almost killing him. he’s trying so hard to be Real to be a Real Person. not Himself of course. someone real here. s14 health scare dennis NOT vigilant about covid ???? REFUSING to admit he had it. because it wasn’t authentic. wasn’t Real. because he spent 2020 hiding away with mac, slowly falling back into old routines, back in love back to being see through. fuck. that’s Not what ireland was for. dennis being the one to point out charlie’s dad died from covid. weird washy vision. dennis the “Only One” who didn’t get vaccinated. s14 health freak out dennis more about mac than anything else. he wanted Everything to be The Same back to when they could read eachother BUT he’s terrified of being Seen by mac. by mac who can Now see himself as gay, what the fuck is he finally going to be able to see in dennis. macs been spun around by dennis so he just goes to i’ll look after dennis Directly when he asks. i don’t want him running away from me again. also pizza poisoning. building back up that codependency. dennis needing anything else than Mac to blame all his mac problems on. Macs priest journey he’s thinking about Himself he’s Looking After Himself. not dennis. big mo should we quit the game. if you’re not having fun anymore. he’s not. everything with dennis is more Pain than anything else. being suffocated by his own love. sorry about the delusional maccricket hopes. mac and cricket ex boyfriends i’ll never stop believing in you though. macden using cricket as a middle man instead of just fucking eachother. den and charlie trying to spin him around confuse him saying he’s not irish. okay. next aspect of my identity is catholic. i’ll just go Full into that. the wars over. the storm has stopped raging. maybe. it’s complex. but it’s easier than dennis. feeling unfulfilled by the church though. this isn’t what i wanted this isn’t filling my dennis shaped hole. coming back together on the mountain. to help charlie. finding the truth. they lied to me told me i wasn’t irish just because they thought i was annoying? heartbreaking. DEVASTATING honestly. fuck you im leaving. i don’t have to help you. you’ll never help me. all i’ve been DOING is trying to Look After Myself so you wouldn’t have to. macs whole LIFE trying so desperately for someone to Love him. fuck man.

but back in the pub. mirror of paddys. we’re never escaping paddys. but why would i want to. we’re always running out into the world looking for treasures when everything we need is right here in the bar. their own ecosystem. and we carry out country (us. giggling like yeah the United States US and just. Us as a relationship) with us wherever we go! BECAUSE WE LOVE HER! and when you love someone , you can’t BEAR TO LEAVE EM BEHIND” watch dennis. face journey. he realises before mac. he loves philly he loves paddys he loves the gang he loves mac. HE CANT KEEP RUNNING AWAY. it’s okay to stop and be stationary. it’s okay to be who you are. “not ever” he’s ran away so many times. even this holiday with the gang he’s running from them. mac looks at him. mac knows. it’s okay that mac can read me that he can see through me like this. it’s good. i missed it. i’m weak and tired of running and I’m Sorry. everything i’ve done to you because i hated myself because i was scared of myself. they go to charlie. it’s the big game. they’ve embraced who they are (american) (Who They Are) and that’s when you WIN. dennis was in north dakota during the big game. wasn’t part of it. was still running. i’ve said it a thousand times sure he’s physically back in philly for years but emotionally he was still running. he’s stopped. laid down to rest.

i don’t want to hypothesise about s16 too much but after the first two eps are out i feel confident saying. the cat is poking his head out of the wall. he’s missing mac. i’ve said before end of clip show SINISTER “we’re back to normal” it’s dennis’ fantasy he wants so badly to become reality. he’s the best at monitoring reality and pulling one over on the gang. because that’s all he Ever does. that’s all he’s been doing. they’ve only just caught on or directly challenged him or tried to live in their own fantasies. i don’t know if dee’s cat is fully coming out of the wall but he’s poking his head. barely saw macden apartment last season because they were running away from her. sterile. in the season Opener we saw Her Insides. the fridge. casual domesticity. throwing out all of their furniture and sleeping on a blow up bed together. he’s stopped running. when you embrace who you are then you WIN. but. macs moving on. it’s been too long. took dennis too long to adjust. that happens. i’m so scared to tinhat about johnny but. i’m still your leading man. macs got another leading man. he’s being replaced maybe. it’s me it was always me. i think we’re gonna see more of that. i have always trusted the structure. i don’t think it’s going to be fruitless. yeah i think i’m out now. he’s BACK from north dakota he’s working on himself. macden doorway in inflates mirroring macdenbreakup. we don’t need to tell you our business. he’s protecting himself protecting their relationship. he’s not getting angry anymore. working to be a person. not letting small things blow up anymore. but it’s not going to be enough. he needs to Show Mac he cares More. it’s going to be difficult but. i trust the structure

[harrypotterandthefandomaccount]

Headcanons For Dating George Weasley

request: hey!!!! i love ur work sm, i reread ur headcanons more times than i’d like to admit!! any concerning remus, ron or george would be bloody brilliant!! like how any of the three would be jealous, or dating them would include or basically anything i will immediately combust into flames!!!

note: hi everyone!! long time no posting! i feel like i’ve been cheating on you all for my mcu account @avengers-age-of-fanfics lmao, but i promise im back and i have a few things in my drafts so keep a lookout! thank u for staying patient :)

-

george has had his eyes on you for a long time, always trying to be in the same classes as you and trying to be your partner in every class.

will literally owl you and ask what classes you’re taking just so he can be in the same ones with you.

before you even get together, fred has had to deal with george talking about you. all. the. time.

it’s not like fred doesn’t like you - he does! but hearing george talk about you 24/7 is a bit suffocating.

his words may mix up and he may stumble, but his feelings are the same and fred can’t help but facepalm.

“isn’t she/he/they just gorgeous, fred?” “i get it, georgie. you’re obsessed and won’t do anything about it.”

george definitely stares at you in class and if you catch him, he’ll either whistle and play it off or wink at you, wishing he was confident to just ask you out already.

gets hit a couple times by fred for being a creep and staring at you for too long. george definitely has a bruise forming at the back of his head.

fred would tell george to “grow a pair and get on with it, you git!”

you’d be so confused and look at george with a slight smile on your face, asking what his twin means.

george would sigh and come clean, telling you how he’s had feelings for you for a few months now and he can’t help but admire how beautiful/handsome you are.

you’d giggle, looking up at george and wrapping your arms around his neck, saying you like him too.

george then proceeds to kiss you all over your face, making you laugh even more.

“finally!” fred would yell from behind the door.

NEVER confusing him with fred. both twins would be surprised as to how you could tell them apart, and he’d love that about you - not comparing them or ‘guessing’ on who is who.

george takes you on many dates into hogsmeade and loves spoiling you over little items and trinkets

keeping a little box of the items he buys you and if he ever finds it, he will definitely tear up.

has many nicknames for you, mostly including “love” “sweetheart” and “darling”

if george is feeling extra love-y, will probably slide a “sweet girl/boy” in there.

always saves you a seat at breakfast, lunch, and dinner, right next to him.

will steal food off your plate when you’re not looking or when you’re having a conversation.

george loves the height difference between you two, always craning his head to look down at you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close.

even if you are taller than him, he just enjoys looking at you

loves smelling your hair and kissing your head.

small moments of pda, like holding hands and kissing your cheek. not a huge pda guy but will sometimes do it just to show that you’re taken

has a really cute habit of kissing your knuckles or just your hand in general

george honestly just loves holding onto you, whether it be your hand, waist, thigh under the table, anything. he loves the feeling of security he gets when he feels your warmth.

he almost melts when you squeeze your hand back, rubbing your thumb against his hand.

gives you piggyback rides :’)

while he isnt into pda, when you two are alone, george certainly is the exact opposite!!!!!

he loves cuddling you and kissing you almost every minute

holds you on his lap whenever you both are alone, mindlessly rubbing his hand over your legs/thighs. will tell you how beautiful/handsome you are.

if you are chest-to-back, he loves just simply holding your hands in his, comparing the sizes and whispering in your ear.

lays on top of you just for fun and will give you kisses all over your face.

big spoon whenever you two cuddle. obsessed with the feeling of holding onto you and having his nose either in your hair or neck.

however he does have his days when he needs to be the little spoon and be cuddled by you

loves making you laugh if his nose or stubble tickles you.

crawling into bed with him when you can’t sleep and he automatically wraps his arms around you, pulling you close, legs tangled.

george will squeeze you, just to make sure that you’re real and with him.

is lowkey very jealous and protective of you.

he’s always been fred’s shadow, so whenever he sees someone flirting with what’s his, george gets very protective and is sure to make known that you’re his.

can sometimes shut down and think he isn’t good enough for you, that you like fred better.

you will not tolerate your boyfriend, your little bby, feeling like this, “georgie, i love YOU. sure, i love fred as a brother, but i love you as my partner. you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

he’d smile at you, worry still gracing his face, but he’d still be thankful, “thank you, my love. . . cuddle time?”

“just gotta remind my boyfriend of how wonderful he is, georgie. c’mon, let’s go cuddle. i’ll be the big spoon tonight :)”

you love stealing his jumpers, especially the one molly made him

spending lots of time at the burrow and wearing many of his clothes just because they smell like george

“why don’t you just wear your own, love?” he’d never admit that he loves seeing you in his clothes

“they dont smell like you, georgie.”

molly adoring you and george being proud for having you as a girlfriend/boyfriend/partner

being very close to ginny and having girl nights with her and hermione, which sometimes makes george jealous.

OR having boys nights with ron, harry, fred, percy, bill and charlie - whenever they were home.

learning from both the twins how to pull off great pranks - which is a mistake.

telling him you love him every chance you get, making him blush and kiss your cheek.

being each other’s first time and he is so sweet about it, making sure everything is perfect and that you’re okay.

george loves whispering in your ear and telling you how good you are for him.

while you aren’t happy about him and fred dropping out to start a joke shop, you are still there to support them both.

becoming their financial advisor and overall advisor for everything they do.

george telling you how much he appreciates you whenever you both leave the shop together to go home, holding hands.

fighting by his side during the wizarding war and being scared for fred when he is injured, but thank merlin, fred makes a full recovery.

moving in together after the war, realizing you could never leave his side. he then surprises you by proposing, saying that if you died, he’d never be able to live with himself.

george loves you for who you are, and vise versa. you’d never change anything about him because he is his own person, and you fell in love with george weasley.

[cloudy-leonhart]

I JUST READ YOUR VETERANS WITH FILIPINO S/O AND IM SO PROUD WCEIWVEHHW, can i also request a veteran reaction to like, their s/o gets flirted with a guy and their s/o is totally oblivious. (also, nanaba is very cute, ate nana 😭✊)

wait but this is such a good request 🥺 maybe that’s just me, I like jealous headcanons lmao-

———

AOT VETERANS JEALOUS HCS WITH OBLIVIOUS S/O!!

[author note: I have a few fic requests in my inbox rn! Please dw if u requested a fic, it takes me a little longer to write fics than headcanons so please don’t think I’m ignoring your request! I also had to rewrite this, I had a bad weekend and tumblr keeps deleting my drafts but I still want to provide for my followers, so I apologize that it’s only half of the veterans! I’ll add Nanaba and Moblit once I do get the motivation too! ]

Summary: S/O get’s flirted with, vets are big jealous babies.

Gender Neutral Reader.

Recommended Song: How Long - Charlie Puth.

TW: some swearing, suggestive themes, yucky boys hitting on you.

Theme: Fluff, canonverse.

Characters: Erwin, Hange, Levi, Miche.

Erwin Smith

Honestly even he couldn’t tell at first that the noble man (lets call him, Gene.) you were talking to was flirting with you.

You were absolutely oblivious, you think Gene is just having a conversation with you and Gene thinks you like him.

When Erwin notices it, at first he’s like “hmm, maybe Reader’s talking business with him.” And then Gene kissed the back of your hand, in which he felt his eye twitching. He started pouting really bad, he looked like a kicked puppy from across the ballroom. He didn’t want to be rude, so he kept reassuring himself that it was a friendly gesture.

You were absolutely clueless, like “this is fine.” clueless. You had no idea Gene was trying his hardest to court you. Until You felt Erwin behind you, that is.

You know those big coughs that you do to get someone’s attention. Yeah, Erwin coughed REALLY loud. Mind you, Erwin probably towers most nobles. So imagine the face on Gene when he saw this tall, titan-slaying commander towering over him. I think he almost peed his pants honestly, he was like “uh..it was nice meeting you, miss Last name, but uh..I- I uhm.. Igottago-“

Yeah he speed-walked his scared ass outta there, you were kinda just like “what?” You saw Erwin’s shadow and just turned around with the cutest smile on your face.

“Erwin!” You chirped, he softened his glare on the noble and looked at you, cue his pout coming back. “You really didn’t know?”

“Know what?” You asked, walking with him, hand in hand. You guys were walking back to your carriage to go home for the night.

“Reader, he was flirting with you, quite literally trying to court you.” Erwin groaned, his jealousy starting to show. You were still a bit confused, so you just stared at him with a blank expression.

“He was just being nice Erwin, come on.” You nudged his arm, trying to get him to loosen up, he looked at you, in which you looked at him with puppy dog eyes, in response he groaned, being a sucker for your puppy dog eyes.

He huffed, “you’re staying back at the headquarters from now on.” Your eyes widened slightly, “What?! Why?!” You shook him arm. “Because I don’t want you being flirted with, you’re mine reader, and I’m yours.” Erwin squished your cheeks together.

“Owf Cwouse I’m youws-“ you took his hands off your cheek. “You’re the only man for me,” you laughed as you entered the carriage.

“Now get in, I’m feeling a little empty inside and you’re the only who can fix that.”

Levi Ackerman

Oh dear, if you’re willing to flirt with the Levi Ackerman’s S/O, you’re basically asking for a death wish.

He usually isn’t too jealous when it comes to someone flirting with his S/O genuinely because he’s either busy doing something or he isn’t there at all but...

He’s not called Humanity’s Strongest for nothing. Both of you were in charge for training the cadets. You were known for your kind behaviour, so obviously a lot of the cadets would ask for your training.

In which Levi was okay with because, duh less work for him. He was doing fine until he glanced at you and saw a male cadet getting a little too close. (calling him, Sam.)

You guys were in a secret relationship at the time, he didn’t want anyone teasing you or him about anything so both of you kept it a secret.

See, he regrets that decision right now because it’s really a pain in the ass to see Sam acting like he doesn’t know the moves when he knows damn well he taught the brat those moves a week ago.

So with a clenched jaw, he glared at Sam as you were behind the cadet, teaching him the same move Levi taught him.

Levi looked across the field to see you behind Sam, helping him strike his punch correctly, he felt angered and a little jealous, watching you be so touchy with him.

He sighed and shook his head, trying to calm himself to keep him from doing something, that is until he watched as Sam tripped you just so he could “catch” you. He caught you in those romantic poses.

You weren’t really paying attention to what he was trying to achieve and instead thanked him, unaware of his plan to kiss you. You tried to get out of Sam’s hold, until you realized that Sam was getting close to you.

You were about to start freaking out until someone pulled you into their arms, you looked at your “saviour”’s face, seeing it’s Levi. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing to a section commander, cadet?” Sam gulped, walking back. “Just making sure captain Reader’s okay, captain Levi.” Sam saluted, sweating profusely.

“That requires you tripping them and almost kissing them?” Levi’s eyebrow raised as his arm tightened against your waist, that’s when a lightbulb lights up in your mind, ‘Is..is Levi jealous??’ “uh well-” Sam tried to explain himself, “I taught you this move last week, you have no excuse to ask for captain Reader’s help.”

A scowl was long planted on Levi’s face. Sam scoffed, “Okay, so I wanted to court captain Reader, but Sir, they’re single, you can’t blame for wanting to court them.” Levi took a step forward, you prevented him from beating Sam up.

“They’ve got a boyfriend.” He spat out, basically death staring Sam down. “And who’s that?” Sam laughed out.

Levi clicked his tongue, before you knew it, Levi’s lips were on yours. “Me.” He stated.

Hange Zöe

Hange, they usually are chill most of the times, to be honest they don’t get too jealous, it’s only when it’s painfully obvious, that’s when it starts to tick them off.

I mean, making Levi Ackerman mad is one thing, but Hange?? I’m already planning your funeral. One of the corps’ rules, never ever make Hange Zöe mad.

It does not help when their S/O absolutely is oblivious. 

Hange starts off with being a little skeptical and glancing at you from afar. then it becomes a stare once in a while, and then their mood gets soiled.

they start to become irritated, at this one garrison squad member (let’s name him Avery) talking with you. You should actually be helping them with their experiments.

And they snap when they see you being offered a flower.

Little clueless Reader, just confirmed Avery’s death, it’s been signed this point on.

You could hear AND feel Hange’s stomps nearing both you and Avery.

God help the poor garrison member, because they’re about to be sent to heaven with how jealous and irritated Hange is.

“Hey, Avery.” Hange’s voice cut through your guys’ conversation, “Hange!” you chirped, holding onto the flower Avery had gifted you. “Hange! You’ve met Reader here right?” Avery asked, also unaware of Hange’s attitude.

“yes, they’re actually my partner.” Hange’s teeth was gritted as they took their rightful place beside you, pulling you close. Cue the awkward silence, “Oh my god, Hange I’m so sorry, I thought they were you know-” Hange didn’t even let him finish. 

“Just get the fuck out, Avery.” Hange gave him a glare that almost made Avery shit his pants. “Yes captain!” He saluted and left before Hange could murder him. “What was that about, Hange?” You asked as they took the flower out of your hand.

“He was courting you, and you were letting him, darling.” Hange stated, as you covered your mouth with your hand, “Oh! I’m sorry Hange! Darn it, I’m so oblivious.” You scolded yourself.

“It’s good you can still remember that you belong to me.” Hange continued, inspecting the flower gifted to you. “Of course, you only, Hange.” You agreed, looking at them. 

“Wanna prove it to me then, Reader?”

Miche Zacharias

Miche is kind of like a grizzly bear, you should never be around him when he’s mad or jealous. 

He tends to be more aggressive when it comes to him being irritated, I don’t mean to headcanon him as a wolf, but I know he just growls when a little thing goes wrong.

He’s possessive over you now, but now he’s basically just suffocating you with his over-protectiveness.

I feel as if he can tell when someone has some kind of weird scent, and it basically spoils everything he can smell.

He tends to hover around you once he gets jealous, he’ll get clingy and probably need to have you touching him somehow, holding hands, side by side. He just needs to be touching you.

He’s the type of person to also just, push away who ever you’re talking with, and just drag you away. 

One time, you and him went on a date and the person who worked there hit on you right in front of him, Miche made him almost piss his pants.

Miche and you were out at an event for survery corps members, celebrating your recent successes with your latest expedition. Miche was with Erwin and Levi while you chatted up a storm with a noble named Walter. 

Miche could feel himself about to break his glass, watching you and Walter laugh together. “So, are you seeing anyone?” Walter asked, you stopped laughing, shocked that he’d ask you that question out of nowhere.

“What?-” At this point Walter had a hold of both of your hands, you were absolutely still in place, “Actually don’t mind that, can I court you?” A big smile was on Walter’s face, wondering about your answer. “I-” 

“You actually can’t, they have a boyfriend.” Miche had long appeared behind you, towering over both you and Walter. You closed your eyes, in a bit of relief, “Yes, this is Miche, he’s a section commander and my boyfriend.” You smiled, hooking your hand with Miche’s, silently hoping that Walter would leave you both alone.

“Ah, I’m terribly sorry, I thought you didn’t have a partner, that’s my fault.” Walter quickly apologized, seeing how intimidating Miche was. “well, I-..I should go, it was lovey meeting you and your boyfriend, Reader.” Walter speed-walked his way out of his situation, leaving you with a pouty and jealous Miche. 

“Why talk to those who look like they have it tiny, Reader?”

[elysianslove]

first of all can i just say congrats on the 500 like i'm so happy for you and you absolutely deserve it (huge bear hug :) ) now i had this crazy hcs idea and i immediately thought of you so long story short how would Karasuno , Aoba Johsai and Nekoma react to their sweet manager having powers similar to those of scarlet witch (marvel) or mirajane strauss (fairytail anime) feel free to pick whichever one is easier and thank you so much for indulging my crazy request. love u lots - safiyah <3333

oh my goodness thank you sm for your words here’s a bear hug <3 also also i was literally just thinking just how cool it would be to have like a supernatural au haikyuu thing and then you send me this wow we on some mind reading shit. anyways i really hope you like this. sorry it’s like hq on crack if you want a serious one lemme know hsjkhsk

karasuno high

they lose their shit. 

every single one of them. 

mentally they’re all like 12 (except daichi and mqybe ennoshita) so i definitely think they’d have a very childish reaction to it. 

it’s so endearing though. 

they find out while walking you home one night: it’s very stormy and they just wanted to make sure you get home safe because they worship the ground you walk on. cue like a fucking billboard nearly falling on you and the group of boys and your instincts just kick in and you stop it mid air. 

noya’s still screaming even after everyone’s just gone silent and is gawking at the fact a billboard (or whatever the object is i can’t think rip) is hovering above them. in mid air. because of you. what the fuck? 

daichi’s blood pressure drops he’s like somebody catch me im about to faint wtf is going on. 

you kinda freak and just toss it away and run your way back home, as far away from the boys as possible. 

but alas, you’re their manager, and you have duties to fulfill. so you show up to practice the next morning terrified for your life. 

you’re not really sure why you’re so scared and nervous. you just are? it’s a huge part of who you are and it’d be a big bummer if the most important boys in your life didn’t accept it. 

noya greets you with a really big hug

tanaka’s so loud but what’s new <3 

daichi and suga just come up to you and gently ask if you’re okay because you ran off so quick yesterday

they all act super normal during practice but you can tell

you can tell

they want to ask so many questions they’re gonna explode 

after practice, when coach ukai and takeda leave, and it’s just you, kiyoko, and the boys, it’s s o quiet. you would hear a pin drop. 

you just sigh and go “you can ask” 

your poor eardrums </3 

they’re so fascinated by everything you say 

kiyoko’s like “i had a hunch” like how do u have a hunch about something like this anyways what a queen

noya’s like “make me fly” 

and tsukki in the back “drop him on his ass pls” 

they definitely make you do so many things for them with it 

cleaning duty is now on you because hello !! you can move things with your mind !! 

kags doesn’t get it. he’s like. ok? and ? i can set volleyballs perfectly, hinata can jump really high despite his height, she can move things with her mind? so what? 

i love him 

they’re also crazy good at keeping it a secret? 

not hinata tho he slips up so often like thank god the secret isn’t realistic or believable

he’ll be like “oh yeah? well our manager can move things with her mind!” 

and suga just has to usher him away with a pained smile like “yeah she’s so incredible haha” while doing that thing moms do where they squeeze or pinch your shoulder if they’re mad at you in public 

it feels like a weight lifted off your shoulders when they find out because the closer you grew to these boys, the more they felt like family to you.

aoba johsai

my favorite team 

i hc makki as someone that smokes weed. pls don’t try to convince me otherwise. look at him. he’s a pothead <3 

this is going somewhere i swear.

so you’re a 3rd year manager, meaning you’ve been with these boys a while now, specifically the third years of the team, so y’all are pretty close. 

how they find out: it’s like 3am on a weekend, the seijoh 4 and some of the second years. you’d baked a cake with like all of them all at once in the kitchen, so it was now a mess, so you’re attempting to clean it up as fast as you can the way you know best — with your hands and your mind. makki walks in, high as shit, sees this and just. 

“damn must be the weed.” 

you don’t hear him. so. uh oh. 

he was probably sent there by iwa to get water or something, so iwaizumi walks in and just yells so loud “what the fuck!” 

it’s like they’re all summoned by this. they eventually all pile into the kitchen and you’re literally just frozen in fear with pots and pans and utensils and specks of flour hovering by you. and then you maintain eye contact with iwa as you lift one hand and direct the pans into a cupboard and slowly shut it. 

“so it’s not the weed?” 

they honestly. don’t act any different tbh 

it’s like an added feature of yours that they appreciate. 

oikawa asks you to read his mind to test if what happened that night was real and you just lift him up from off his seat. 

“i asked you to read my mind tho hm” 

yeah mind reading is just a regular thing now. they will slyly ask you to read the other team’s minds during a match and you’re like no that’s cheating. but you do. and you subtlety give them advice. like “hm i wonder if that team’s gonna do this specific attack” 

also oikawa asks (read:begs) u to like help them make it through to nationals

you say “will it feel like a true accomplishment if i do?” 

shuts his pretty face up <3 

they also make you like. toss volleyballs to them. but with your mind. multiple of them. they take it as some stupid challenge idk these boys are dumb i love them 

they also love throwing things at. YOU. LIKE WTF? 

like haha dodgeball but it’s a group of 6’0+ athletes against just. you. 

sounds fair 

they also become insanely protective of you after they find out. idk how that clicks w them but. yes. 

especially mattsun and iwa ? like men. relax.

anyways they would abuse the shit out of your powers genuinely but it’s okay it’s out of love <3

nekoma high

they. they’re idiots. all of them. 

kuroo would probably be like but scientifically ! this makes zero sense 

omg kenma would lose his MIND. 

HES A GAMER BRUH 

HED BE OBSESSED W YOU.

but lowkey bc none of that simp shit </3 

ooou okay so you’re at a training camp and they sneak you in with them so you guys can play truth or dare 

bc yk. you’re kids. 

and y’all are going around and you just pick truth and someone asks what’s the biggest secret you’ve ever kept from us and they expect some dirty shit they’re nasty smh 

and then you straight up go “i can move things w my mind” 

and theyre like ok miss stop playin fr 

keep in mind it’s dark as hell in the dormitory and eerily quiet and you shift one of the chairs in there, and it squeaks loudly

yamamoto jumps and looks at you w so much fear in his eyes. “that wasn’t you” 

“bet?” 

and then suddenly all chairs are moving all at once and yamamato deadass screams 

kuroo’s shrugging like. “it’s just the wind,” like ur not in a closed off room w all the windows shut whatever u say sir <3 

lev’s like

gone into shock. seriously someone go get him water or something. 

when morning comes they’re all like hella scared to approach you except kenma and kuroo bc kenma— is in awe. kuroo — does not believe it. 

you’re kinda :( that they’re scared of you and you approach them after the day is over and just apologize, and tell them you didn’t mean to scare them and that you’d never hurt them or even consider it. 

they do a 180 bruh they just all go “awwwwww” and suffocate you in a group hug so you shove them all off for good measure lmao 

kuroo still doesn’t believe it until you save his ass in broad daylight and he’s like ok maybe it wasn’t fake so what sue me 

whenever there are training camps where other schools come they beg u to help them prank the boys 

especially bokuto and hinata 

and you do obviously 

it’s hilarious watching them scream as something moves slightly. you never do it that it’s suspicious just enough to be like did that happen or is my mind messing w me rn 

scarlet witch also has the ability to mess w people’s mind in the literal sense and whenever one of the boys pisses you off particularly you just make them see their biggest fear 

kenma asks you to reenact some of his favorite gameplays for him

it’s literally just roleplay and you couldn’t care less someone catches the two of you you’re no pussy you can admit when you’re having fun 

overall a very chaotic reaction 

they don’t treat you any different they’re just like 100x more hyped about who you are. like the fact that you’re their manager is already a blessing and now this !!! 

incredible <3333

[9tzuyu]

dissolve (rewrite)

natasha x reader

note: this was just a huge vent fic idk. these type of fics seem to be the only thing im okay at writing. mistakes are mine as always. but i did proofread, yay!

if you want to read the original (as awful as it is) you can read it here!

wanrings: this heavily revolves around eating disorders.

i’m not tagging anyone because the content isn’t really the lightest to read.

words are used everyday, everywhere – whether to describe something or someone. there’s thousands upon thousands of them.

so you were having a hard time figuring out why you were struggling so much to justify your feelings through the basis of words. it was unnerving, draining and very annoying. your emotions should be simple, right? you were either sad or happy, angry or scared. but there was something more, something unexplainable. saying you felt alone only scratched the surface of the wave of emotion that took over. it was excruciatingly painful, far worse than any physical pain you ever had to endure. and for some reason it seemed to come crashing down at night while natasha slept peacefully. you weren't exactly sure how to express your emotions to the extent you felt them. how else was anyone supposed to understand your pain? they couldn't, not unless they could somehow shift into your body and feel your emotions themselves. but that was merely impossible as such powers do not exist. so you were inevitably stuck with words foreign to your lips. over the years you were deemed unsafe, a hazard, "an accident waiting to happen" you recall one doctor say. everyone’s eyes were on you at all times, monitoring every little movement you made. it was suffocating and at times doing more damage than good.

as an adult now you learned how freeing it could be without the fear of gaining weight or eating a bowl full of rainbow marshmallow cereal. your worth was not defined by your weight.

(at least that's what you believed prior to any relapses.) everything was going well in your life. you were a college graduate working as a psychiatric nurse and you had found love, something your teenage self could only dream of. natasha was by your side through everything. and really, the only downfall in the relationship was that she had to travel a lot for her job. but you were secure enough in your relationship not to worry or decide to call things off. in the end natasha always made up for it when she came back, so you couldn't complain too much. things were going well for you, really, they were. until they weren't. (and you didn't know why.) it happened out of nowhere. work was a little more stressful than usual, but it was nothing you couldn't handle. natasha had been away for three months, only stopping by a few times to check in on you. but again, your wife being away for so long wasn't anything new or worrisome. the two of you had followed the routine of her leaving and coming back more than a thousand times; yet somewhere along the way you lost yourself. food became less of a priority, your hunger decreased drastically, and within the first month you'd lost thirteen pounds. it truly was an accident, slipping into a full blown relapse was never part of the plan. but thirteen pounds lighter you wanted more, to feel small again. you didn't have an answer as to why you became so attached to your eating disorder, but it didn't seem like it would be letting go any time soon. the rate at which you were going natasha would most definitely be able to see a difference; not only on your weight, but in the person you once were. she'd ask what happened and why it happened, poking and prodding for an answer, but you didn't have one. so here you stood in the kitchen of your shared home, a cup of sliced fruit in one hand and your cell phone in the other. you poured the fruit into the bottom of a blender along with a spoonful of yogurt and half a cup of soy milk. another half cup of ice followed suit. while the fruit blended, you shamelessly scrolled through your instagram. there was nothing interesting going on in other people's lives, you didn't even know why you had social media in the first place. it was dumb, and quite frankly you didn't give a shit whether or not sharon went to the beach. the sound of your blender coming to a halt brought your attention back to the real world. you poured your smoothie into your water bottle. the green liquid would be your breakfast and lunch for the day - dinner was still up for debate. a soft sigh left your lips. work was beginning to feel more like a chore and less of something you enjoyed. you were quickly growing tired of it. nonetheless, you grabbed your keys and rushed out of the door.

you thought about the irony of working as a psychiatric nurse with an undealt eating disorder telling teenagers how to deal with their own issues. you felt hypocritical to say the least, especially given that all the nasty side effects were starting to make themselves known.

your hair was beginning to thin, small clumps of it already starting to fall out when you tugged a little too hard. bruises could be seen scattered left and right on your body, and you were cold. god you were cold. your fingernails were tinted blue, warmth seemingly too far out of reach. you looked ill, and it didn't go unnoticed by your coworkers.

a few hours into your shift you found yourself sitting behind the nurses station filling out paperwork. lunch had passed and when your coworker, steve, asked if you were going to eat something you lied straight through your teeth, telling him you'd grab something when the patients were eating dinner.

but steve rogers could read you like an open book. he knew you were lying because he already knew what was going on. the signs of an eating disorder were quite obvious when you were a licensed therapist. and despite your futile attempts at hiding it, everyone could tell something wasn't right.

steve played it by ear for weeks until he contacted natasha, but by then you'd already lost a considerable amount of weight. as soon as she heard the news, natasha booked the next flight home. unfortunately for her though, there was only one flight and she would have to wait two and a half weeks before being able to leave.

you didn't know it, but those were the longest two and a half weeks natasha ever had to wait.

– patients were having group therapy, so you could tune them out - not that you should, but it was hard to focus when the only two things you could think about were food and your weight.

the need to lose weight sounded so stereotypical for someone with an eating disorder, but honestly it wasn't about that. it was never about wanting to be thin. you genuinely didn't know why this was happening. the only thing you noticed was how rewarding it felt seeing the number go down, as if for you were good for becoming less. it was addictive. and it didn't help that you based your entire worth on how much you could lose.

the next time you stood up from behind the nurses station steve met you in the the cafeteria. while the patients ate you took occasional sips from your smoothie. the bottle was still full of its contents from the morning. you had completely forgotten to drink it during the day, but you didn't seem to mind it that much.

the surprise touch of steve's hand on your shoulder startled you.

i am gross, you thought. do not do that.

steve caught onto the slight flinch your body produced as a reflex, but he didn't say anything about it.

"you can leave early, boss said so."

he laughed as he saw confusion plaster your face.

"what? no!"

"go home, seriously. we have this handled. you know tony doesn't like being told no."

you bit your lip, puzzled by the sudden request. most people wouldn't mind being sent home early, but all it did for you was give you a level of anxiety reserved for food.

what you didn't know was that natasha was home waiting for your arrival. she came back just short of an hour after you left for work.

while you were gone natasha made a few thorough rounds in the house looking for key signs of your eating disorder. there was bound to be evidence given that you didn't know she was home.

unsurprisingly, natasha found a glass scale beside the counter of the bathroom floor along with empty bottles of laxatives in the trashcan. the food in the fridge had been expired a few days past their date, giving her the indication that you weren't eating as much as you should be. her concern grew even more when she found your food journal on your nightstand. flipping the pages, natasha could see that throughout the moths she'd been gone your calorie intake had decreased significantly.

guilt began to gnaw at the back of her throat.

during the few days natasha stopped by, she hadn't noticed anything wrong with you. but then again she knew most people with eating disorders were very good at hiding them up until the point they were discovered. three days wasn't near enough time for her to catch onto your tricks, not when her mind was still focused on her job.

natasha always listened intently whenever you would talk about your eating disorder, the first time being six months into the relationship on a date you felt like you had ruined.

but talking about it was much different than experiencing it with you, natasha had never done that before up until now. she read nearly every article there was about anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder and ednos. sometimes when you were asleep she would watch documentaries on the disorder, always making sure to keep her volume at a low level.

the videos that hurt her the most were the ones teenagers struggling with the simple task of eating food.

(although natasha knew it wasn't that simple.)

it hurt because she knew that was you at some point in time.

upon your arrival, natasha cooked dinner. she wanted to hold onto the one sliver of hope that steve was wrong - that he was just overreacting - but she knew in her heart he was right about his assumption. however, dinner would only confirm what natasha so desperately wanted to deny.

when you walked through the door you were greeted with the overwhelming scent of food. you cringed at the thought of having to eat, but as soon as you looked up to see the redhead who'd been gone for so long your frown was washed away. a wide smile overtook your face and you rushed to jump into natasha's arms.

"i missed you so much," you whispered. "i thought you'd be gone for another few weeks?"

natasha's arms found their way around your waist as your legs wrapped around hers. "what? i can't come home early to surprise my wife?" you giggled in the crook of her neck. she smiled feeling the vibrations against her skin, happy to know that you'd missed her just as much as she missed you.

she sat you down, back facing you, she tended to the food. "you've lost weight," she commented, not missing the sharp inhale of your breath.

"how was work, nat?"

she nodded to herself. yeah, she didn't expect you to be so open on the first try.

"it was fine. dinner's ready, i made your favorite!" natasha threw a smile in your direction as she carried the plates over to the table. she had hoped to see your face light up the way it used to, but seeing the panicked look in your eyes further confirmed your relapse.

if nothing else, natasha wanted you to have a meal before she brought up the conversation.

"great... i love it, thank you nat!" your attempt at being enthusiastic failed miserably and you knew by the look she gave you, she already knew what was going on.

but throughout the meal, and despite the shakiness of your hand as it gripped the metal fork, natasha didn't say anything.

you weren't really sure which was worse; being confronted or knowing the both of you knew what the other was thinking and still not addressing it.

natasha's meal was good, you couldn't lie about that, but each bite you chewed caused the tightening in your chest to constrict further.

now you couldn't be good. or worthy. or deserving.

nat took away your plate when you were halfway through. she knew your limits, and she didn't want to push you too much out of your comfort zone.

"go change, i'll wash our dishes. meet you on the couch?"

you did as you were told, taking as long as you could to do so. except this time was different. you didn't glance in the mirror like you usually did, you chose to fully take in your figure.

what you saw was not what you expected to see. for the first time in months you saw a version of yourself that wasn't twisted and turned to be something you didn't know was real or not.

your skin was dry, hair thinned out beyond your belief, eyes sunken and dark underneath. the revelation gave you an odd feeling – was once again something unexplainable, unjustifiable by words.

good.

that was how you were supposed to feel, right? after all of this time, after the many pounds of protection and warmth lost, you were supposed to feel good.

but you didn't. and you never would.

there was something so surreal about the realization of your own destruction. you were aware now, which meant you had to either take responsibility or choose to lose everything you worked so hard for.

"y/n?"

your wife's voice snapped you out of your gaze and you scrambled to pile your dirty clothes and rush out of the bedroom.

as you made your way into the living room you could feel the intensity of natasha's gaze. any other time you would not mind her green eyes looking at you, but this time around you felt like you were in trouble.

she patted the empty spot next to her, to which you reluctantly joined. but even after everything you still tried to play it cool.

"what's up? is everything okay?"

she gave a low chuckle, "you tell me."

"what do you mean?"

"oh i think you know what i mean."

natasha’s reply was met with the loudest silence you ever had to sit through.

she bit her lip, "you know i got a call from steve a few weeks ago. he's concerned about you, and from what he's told me so am i."

you were quick to respond, automatically knowing what steve’s phone call was about. "i'm fine. so what if i've lost a couple of pounds? that doesn't automatically mean that im relapsing, natasha."

your quick snap reminded natasha that this kind of confrontation was like walking on eggshells.

she tilted her head, licking her lips. "i'm here with you, always." nat put a hand to the side of your face, gently rubbing her thumb at the top of your cheekbone. "i'm here."

it seemed pointless now to try and say anything because your secret was already out.

your mind began racing back and forth.

you wanted to keep what you knew best and natasha understood that. even by reading your body language she knew what you were debating.

"you know, to keep it you have to give it away." your eyes darted to meet hers. "mhm. you can still have that piece of you. mourn it, grieve it, do whatever you need to do to move onto a stage where it doesn't hurt you. and from there you can help other people, share your experience, let yourself heal by helping others."

she paused, “we all have choices. some of those choices are taken from you while others leave you with only one option.”

although what she said seemed to resonate with you, there was one thing still holding you back.

"i just want to be good."

natasha hummed. you had explained it to her in the past, though your words were jumbled together as you tried to describe it.

"you can be good in other ways. you're allowed to live a life outside of the barriers your eating disorder puts in the way."

you swallowed the lump in the back of your throat. "i don't even know how it got to this point. in january i enjoyed ihop and dennys. in february i could have oatmeal and bananas, sometimes half of a sandwhich if i was feeling brave. now it’s march and i only eat one or two things a day. the idea of having a full meal makes me want to cry. and i just- i don't know how to stop."

natasha wouldn't show it, but your words cut through her heart like a knife. her mind wandered briefly to all the teenagers in the documentaries she'd watched, hoping you weren't too far gone into your eating disorder to ever come back. those cases scared her the most.

"you've got my complete support. you've tackled this before, maybe this time you can beat it? i know its easier to abuse your body instead of growing comfortable in it, but i think you’ve got this. i know you do."

"what about your work?" your question caused natasha to frown. "you think i wouldn't set my job aside for you?" you shrugged, it's not like you felt like you were worth being taken care of anyway.

natasha grew hesitant to tell you her news, but did it anyway because she’d rather you hate her than see you dead. "i've already made some appointments for you. the first one is tomorrow morning."

"i figured you would natasha. it's okay."

you spaced yourself out the rest of the day. each time you made the executive decision to recover, whether that be a genuine recovery or not, the process never failed to remind you that even trying to recover from an eating disorder felt like mourning the loss of a friend who was never good for you in the first place.

[corruptedsilence]

@bigveee​ -  idk how many issues you have had, but when it comes to things with ME plz dont think they were ever anything serious. Ya never were out of line or said anything offensive to me. Cleared things up very easily and you handled it all very well.

That’s the thing though Finn, I didn’t handle it well. I broke down and had a meltdown over worrying and letting my anxiety suffocate me and choke me out. I didn’t approach you until I literally had panicked for a while because I was terrified of situations repeating themselves even though as you said I shouldn’t worry with you, you haven’t given me a reason to, and earlier i was just terrified that if I say anything about my anxiety with anyone else they’ll take it as me assuming the worst about people which sadly is true.

I’m not feeling emotions like fear, it’s just anxiety. I’ve experienced it when i first started my last medication that I could *feel* my emotions and actually describe them as spesific things, but lately at the end of taking my last medicine (which was a second reason i stopped taking it) and right now I feel my emotions aren’t spesific, they’re just basic-- fear, anxiety. If I’m happy I’m happy but im nothing else and I’ve felt what it’s like to not be like that, I know it’s possible but now it feels hollow. It feels heavy. The emotions i had are no longer just emotions but they’re weights pushing me higher or plummeting me.

i dont know how else to describe it?? but i know what im feeling now isnt right, it doesnt have to be that way either but i dont know if i can outside of medicine access this and it’s why i need to talk with my therapist and why im sorry because i need to do better to actually realize this. It took breaking down talking with my GF (neeko) about a situation i cant speak about (this happened literally tonight) but makes me so enraged despite the fact i shouldnt be, what triggered it shouldn’t be a problem and i realize that but I couldn’t stop myself and I honestly was, and am, scared.

I haven’t spoken about it but these emotions, terrify me. It felt too similar to the (unintentional) suicidal action (i took 8x the amount of an over the counter sleeping pills i should have in a 24hr period) I had done earlier this month? (october or september i cant remember), i wasn’t in control, i wasn’t in my body, i was just this one single emotion, not a person not a human just this one feeling, and im really scared what’s going on. which is why I want to say im sorry for not realizing it sooner, and im sorry for damage or if I had hurt you and i realize i need a lot more help than i first realized. i thought i was doing okay, but i wasn’t and its hard to accept that

[sweet-rintarou]

"Did you even shower?" Oikawa asked you once you sat in the passenger seat. Noticing the sweater, sweatpants and untidy hair, it was an obvious sign that you did not do what he was asking.

"No, because some bitch was whining," you snapped, glaring at him, causing him to cringe back and place an arm over his nose. "I don't stink, okay? I'm not you."

"Hey, I smell incredible, if you should know," he says matter-of-factly, rolling his eyes. "Anyway, you doing anything after the shoot?"

Remembering your conversation with Ushijima last night, your sour mood was immediately shifted and you beamed up at Oikawa, only earning a surprised, and borderline disgusted look from him. "Yes, I'm going on a date with Toshi."

"God, it's fucking weird hearing you call him that," he cringed, his upper lip curled up. "Are you sure that's okay? We're still under contract, you know?"

"I know, but he said he'll take me to a town next to here, so I'm trusting him," you inform. "I've committed to this stupid contract for more than three months, I'm honestly sick of going on dates with only you."

"Y/N..." he frowned, glancing at you briefly before focusing back on the road. "I'm hurt."

"Good, because you are a terrible conversationalist."

"How?"

"I never know what you're talking about 99% of the time." He looks towards you quickly, brows furrowed and an obvious angry pout on his lips. "I only respond the designated responses any bored person would say, accommodated with reactions."

He thought over your words, reflecting them to your actions when you were to go on dates. Realization struck him, causing him to reach out and hit the top of your head.

You returned it by pinching his arm.

Your heart was racing against your chest. It's been three months since you had met up with Ushijima because of the chaos of your debut preparation, photoshoots on photoshoots, and recordings. Your interactions with Ushijima were limited to phone calls and text messages. You hadn't seen him in person since that time in the restaurant with Oikawa.

To say the least, you were scared that he'd think you've changed. You never got to tell him that during the three months you were placed on a strict diet and had changes to your appearance, including your hair and how you dressed—however, for tonight, you were dressed in a casual tee and jeans, accompanied by a jacket you stole from Yūji. Your hair though... The company had you try different colors for the concept pictures of your debut, which was different—drastically—from the hair you sported when you met Toshi.

The ding of the elevator reaching the lobby floor caused your heart to jump to your throat and it felt like an eternity before the doors finally opened.

You stepped out, looking to both sides to find Ushijima standing in front of a different elevator, face scrunched up in confusion as to why it wasn't opening.

"Toshi," you called, causing the 6-foot man to turn to where you were, eyes widening upon seeing your new appearance. The silence between you two was suffocating, but was relieved when his eyes shifted to yours, squinted into crescent as his signature smile appears.

"Y/N...You look beautiful."

silver lining | w. ushijima smau

previous | masterlist | next

part thirty-eight

—since last

author's note: IT'S BEEN SO SO LONG AND IM SO SORRY FOR DISAPPEARING I GENUINELY AM😭😭 i have a full apology post here, but long story short, college was hectic as fuck and im finally done with my semester, i had gone thru 183738 breakdowns and went thru a rut cuz idk what i wanted to do, but im feeling better (slowly) and also, i need to end this au fast cuz if it aint me then no one's gonna do it😔 kinda wish aus could finish themselves, they're so not independent 🙄 imma make sure ive queued up every chapter to avoid falling off the face of the earth again 😢

taglist (CLOSED) : @alienvarmint @loubells @naughtylittleweeb @tycrackculture @someone-you-dontknow @iloveyouasmuchaspoohloveshoney @stargirlara @brownsugartease-blog @leviathans-watching @kenjiru @ushiwakaismybae @elianetsantana @kagebunshiin @dainslove @marajillana @wannakeillmyself @bokuto-buns @pinq-bug @ihateccmber @changkyun-not @mischevious-pixie @mochi-the-uwu @haengbokpixie @kiritokunuwu @kittyddandnyla @runningwitches @cevanswhre @mint-mai @morpheus-rex @franko-pop @bigchaosenergy @luhvsnoir @shadowpurr @fueledbyapplepi @bellesowl @nonbinaryh0e @somis0 @farmertoshi @a-moon-fairy @cat-kinda-moon @halesandy @putmeinyourdeathnote @kookie-doughs @nikanikabitch @fuckjeffreybezos @icedberrytea @dearfushiguro @sevenlol @darlingkuroo (send an ask if you want to be added) if your name is crossed, i cant tag you

[stargirlrchive]

Fantasies - Spencer Reid

masterlist ; request are open (send me stuff <3)

author’s note: okay i have never written smut, ever. and i want to but im shy 👉🏼👈🏼 and i was trying to write some stuff here but i couldn’t get myself to go all the way. so sorry about that, I WILL IMPROVE AND I WILL WRITE A SMUTTY PIECE EVENTUALLY. it’s my goal for the end of the year. italics and bold are a dream & i hate the title again, nothing new

disclaimer: NSFW, smut no actual s*x and very vague (honestly don’t know if it would even be considered but yeah!) GIF NOT MINE

pairing: spencer reid x reader

word count: 3,365

His tongue was hot on your body as it trailed down your chest, reaching near your belly button. He pursed his lip and bit down, letting dark marks litter from your neck all the way down to your lower stomach. You could see a mop of curls but couldn’t make out who it was. But you didn’t really care, his tongue was far too skilled and distracting. He kissed down to your thighs and before he got to where you wanted him most, he looked up and you felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach, “Spencer?”

You woke up scared, confused and flustered. Your body had set off into a cold sweat and you were so utterly frustrated. Frustrated for two reasons, the first being that your dream ended right before it got good, and second because you had been trying to suppress those feelings but it seemed that your subconscious mind was catching up with you. Spencer was probably the person you were closest to, and you had managed to block out any feelings you had for him so it wouldn’t interfere with your friendship. Or so you thought.

You felt a flutter in the pit of your stomach and looked at the clock, 6:54 am. You were normally up by 7:30 to get your day started and head over to the office so you figured you’d just stay up.

Your daily morning routine was done and you were ready to go, still having a half hour before you needed to leave so you decided you would just grab a coffee. Your thoughts circling back to your dream every time your eyes fluttered shut and you couldn’t get the image of the genius out of your mind. It felt so real and so hot. You had no idea how you were going to get through the day.

Even as you sat at your desk it was so obvious something was wrong. Every time the door to the office opened you flinched and Derek and Emily had taken notice. “What’s wrong?”

Emily was looking at you with so much worry and you felt bad because you had no idea what to tell her. “I-have you ever had a dream- like a sex dream?”

“Always.”

Derek’s voice made you jump and everyone around you started laughing because of course he would say that. “O-ok what about if it was someone you had never had a dream like that about and-and you can’t stop thinking about it and it’s going to be so incredibly awkward when you see him, which you’re going to see him in like 10 minutes at most and it was really hot but it was so wrong.”

You had got everything out in one breath and your cheeks were a permanent shade of red as they both laughed at you, “It was Hotch wasn’t it?”

“What the hell!”

They laughed at your utterly mortified face, “No it was not, it was Spencer!”

“It was Spencer, what?”

You had stilled at the sound of his voice, you had been so involved in recounting your nightmare to your friends that you had failed to notice him walk in, they were still laughing at you. “Y-you forgot to turn the lights off from the office last night, since you were the last to leave.”

He did not look at all convinced but to your relief, he let it go. You just needed to keep a respectful distance from your cute genius friend and everything would be fine.

~

It was not fine, nothing about the day was fine. Hotch had paired you and Spencer together to work on some reports from the last case the team had taken on. He was so close you could smell his cologne and his floppy head of hair taking you back to your dream. You shifted and tried to get as far away as possible from him, hoping he had not noticed. But he had.

He noticed everything and he was hurt, to say the least. He didn’t understand what had caused the change between the two of you. You had always been very close.

The two of you had started working around the same time but you were strictly working under Penelope. Until you realized you preferred being hands on with the BAU, you hated having to stay behind. And your age, the two of you were the youngest of the group everyone always teased that the two of you would end up together, or at least hooking up. None of that had happened, much to Spencer’s disfortune.

“Did I do something?”

“What?”

“Did I do something to upset you?”

Your face was scrunched you in confusion and also discomfort, you didn’t want things to be weird but you felt bad. Bad because now when you looked at him all you could picture was his tongue tracing your body. And it felt so right, like ink marking parchment but you knew it was wrong. He had no idea about your fantasies and you hated having to keep a secret. Especially from Spencer.

“Spencer, you did nothing wrong. I-I just don’t feel good. And being in here is making me really hot and maybe I just need to work at my own desk because I feel suffocated in here.”

He knew you were lying, his eyes had hardened and he was so angry. “I need to clear my head, I can’t concentrate.”

He heard you vaguely mumble before you stepped out of the office, letting him drown in his thoughts of what was going on with you. You quickly walked out of the office the two of you had been in and we’re going to make your way to the restroom when Hotch stepped out of his office.

“Can I see you for a minute inside my office?”

His voice was flat, but there was amusement dancing in his eyes and you felt your stomach drop, turning to see Emily and Derek snickering behind you. You knew they had kept talking about it and Hotch had over heard them.

He motioned for you to shut the door and so you did, sitting down stiffly as he danced around the words he was going to say, the amusement lingering in his eyes made you tense up. This was mortifying, “Get on with it, Hotch.”

“People think I have no sense of humor, but I think I have pretty great sense of humor. Don’t you?”

Your eyes narrowed at your boss, “Depends.”

“How’s working with Reid?”

“It’s been normal.”

He was full on smiling now, “Are you ever going to tell him?”

“I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about and even if I did know, wouldn’t you want me to not say anything. No fraternizing.”

His eyes rolled so far back you were sure it hurt him, “As long as it doesn’t affect your work, I could care less what you all do, or who you do, outside of the office.”

Your cheeks burned, “But if you need motivation I know he feels the exact same.”

Your eyes narrowed on his figure once more, questioning him, “You get a few drinks in him and he’s an open book.”

You didn’t respond, not knowing what to say, “But seeing as it’s as hard as it is for you, I’ll just have him work with Garcia and you can finish up paperwork with Prentiss and Morgan.”

You couldn’t oppose, not that you wanted to, you needed some space from him. You stepped out of his office and made your way to your two colleagues, “What was that about?”

You shrugged your shoulders, “I’m working with the two of you now.”

“It can’t be that bad working with Spencer is it?”

They were teasing you, “No but it is distracting, so how can I help?”

~

You weren’t sure how long it had been since you left Hotch’s office, but by the look of anger and confusion on Spencer’s face when he left the room he was in you could tell it had been awhile. You forgot to tell him you weren’t working with him anymore.

“Shit-sorry Spence. Hotch to-“

“You’re being so childish.”

You tensed at his words, “Excuse me?”

Derek and Emily could feel the rising tension and quickly tried to jump in for you. “You’re so angry at me you had to go tell Hotch to change you assignments.”

“No I didn’t. He-“

“I can’t believe you.”

You were fuming, he wasn’t giving you the chance to answer, “Maybe if you stopped interrupting me and let me explain myself you wouldn’t be so angry.”

“Whatever, I didn’t need your help anyway. You weren’t necessarily helping. If anything just slowing me down and being a nuisa-“

“Reid.” Derek’s voice cut through to the two of you, the hurt clear on your face and Spencer’s anger leaving him in a second. He shouldn’t have said that. He didn’t mean to say that.

You turned away from him and ignored the way he was calling out for you, instead diving into the huge pile of paperwork the three of you still had.

“Drop it, Spencer. Hotch wanted you to help Garcia anyways.” You heard him sigh after Emily told him to leave you alone, only looking up from your mountain of work when you heard his footsteps disappear.

~

Spencer wanted to pull his hair out, he was hurt by the way you had been acting but you hadn’t actually said anything to hurt his feelings. And he did, he purposely hurt you and the guilt was eating him up. Clearly affecting him and Penelope was growing frustrated with his constant pacing.

“You’re more twitchy than normal.”

He let out a breathy laugh, delving into what exactly had happened between the two of you. Penelope was glaring at him, “I-I know, I was mean! And I didn’t really mean it I was just hurt. I dealt with it wrong.”

She huffed quietly, “You need to apologize.”

Spencer’s eyes looked frantic, he didn’t even know what to say to you, “Hey I have feelings for you and since you didn’t want me around you I felt hurt and in turn, I was a dick.”

“Now.”

She was pushing him out of the room, ignoring his protest and locking the door once he was out. He let his head fall onto the door and heard the muffled voice of Penelope through the door, “You can’t come in until the mission is complete.”

He turned from the door and let his eyes scan over the floor, he couldn’t see you.

“On her lunch.”

Emily didn’t even look up from the pile of paperwork and Spencer muttered out a quiet ‘Thank you.’

He was walking towards the lunchroom when JJ stopped him, an iced coffee in her hand, “She isn’t in there.”

His face scrunched up, “Does everyone know what happened?”

“Yes.”

“Where is she?”

“Hotch’s office.”

With that she walked alway and Spencer groaned quietly, you were avoiding him.

-

“And then he was going to call me a nuisance. I know he was, Morgan just got him to stop talking before he finished his sentence. Can you believe that?”

Hotch was trying not to laugh at you, “Yes well men are idiots.”

“You’re a man.”

“I’m the only exception.”

“Rossi too.”

He laughed quietly as you angrily stabbed your food, “I am never going to tell him now.”

“I thought there was nothing to tell?”

You glared at him, “Now out of my office, I have work to do.”

You huffed and made your way to leave, you knew he’d let you stay if you really wanted to but you still had work to do. “I will keep pairing you up with him if you don’t tell him.”

“Is that a threat?”

“Yes.”

You both laughed and you shut his door, stilling as you saw Spencer lingering around your desk. He sent you a small smile and you turned away from him, making your way towards the restroom. You couldn’t believe that all this was happening because of some stupid dream you had.

When you returned Spencer was no longer at your desk and you quickly jumped back into your work, hoping no more distractions came your way.

~

Thankfully, the rest of the day went without any interruptions. You tied your hair up and made yourself some coffee, you wanted to come in later tomorrow so you decided you’d stay as long as you needed to, to finish up your work. Slowly everyone began to gather their things and leave, and you tried not to think about how you had not seen Spencer leave.

Hotch and Rossi were talking quietly among themselves as they were walking out, “Late night?”

You nodded, “Just a few more files, I should be out here in like an hour more or less.”

“Have fun.”

You smiled at both of them and continued on with your work.

40 minutes had passed and you heard quiet arguing coming from Penelope’s office and then the door being pulled open and both her and Spencer walking out, turning away from the both of them to keep working.

You could hear them talking quietly amongst themselves and then Penelope spoke up, “Do you have a lot of work?”

“Just two files, im almost done.” You sent them a smile but it was mainly for Pen, they both knew it and Spencer was shifting awkwardly between his feet. “Perfect! You shouldn’t take too long and Spencer can help so you don’t stay here by yourself.”

“No.”

But Spencer was already walking towards you and you huffed quietly, “I don’t know why he would want to if he clearly thinks I just hold him back.”

He whined your name out quietly, asking you to stop. You turned back to Penelope to see she had already left, she sent you a thumbs up from the elevator and you slumped into your seat. You didn’t know if you were being childish but you were upset with him.

He took one of the files and you worked quietly next to each other, but you could feel his eyes on you every couple seconds. “I’m sorry.”

You didn’t say anything. You had both finished the the file you were working on and you simply closed and we’re preparing to leave.

He was getting frustrated again, you could tell by the way he was wearing his bottom lip out and the way his arms were bawled up in fist. He hated when the people he cared about were upset with him, when you made your leave to walk away he had enough.

His hand had wrapped around your wrist and he pulled you in abruptly, causing you to curse under your breath. His arms had enclosed around you at the desk, not letting you leave.

He was so close his cologne had began to take up everything around you and you resisted letting your eyes close. You were looking up at him as he towered over you. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said and I shouldn’t have said that! I don’t think you were slowing me down and everything else I said.”

His words were soft and frantic and there was guilt in his eyes and you huffed quietly. You forgave him, and he knew you had too. “It’s okay. I’m sorry I was being weird today too.” Your cheeks burned pink as you remembered your dream and you realized just how close he was to you. He noticed how your cheeks flushed and how you pushed yourself from him, although it didn’t help much. You were still so close. “Are you going to tell me why?”

“I don’t want to.”

You were playing with the ends of your hair, a nervous habit. “It’s embarrassing and I don’t want things to change between us.”

His face scrunched up in confusion and he removed his arms from around the desk, letting you leaving if you wanted to, but you didn’t and Spencer was glad you hadn’t. “I don’t think anything could make our relationship change. Unless you say Harry Potter is better than Star Wars.”

You both laughed quietly, things feeling normal again. “I had a dream about you-about us. And you were doing things, to me. And I just can’t get it out of my head and you’re distracting. And while I’m confessing I guess I should just tell you I’ve had feelings for you, that sounds so juvenile I hate it. But I’ve had feelings for you for the longest time and I kept trying to suppress it because we’re friends but we’re also colleagues and it would create so much tension and now I can’t stop talking because I’m nervous and you don’t feel the same because you aren’t saying anything, which is fine, I just needed to tell you.”

He was all over you in the next second, hand on your hips as he pressed himself against you and pressed you against the desk even more. The metal causing a slight sting, but that was the farthest thing from your mind. His lips had melted into yours and his tongue exploring your mouth. He let out a quiet moan as your rolled your tongue against his and tugged on his hair. He had sat you on the desk towards the edge and continued the assault on your lips, his hips rolling against yours and feeling a surge of confidence flow through all parts of his body at the moans and whimpers leaving your lips.

His fingers were fumbling with your belt and your hips bucking into his hand despite your words. “Spencer we’re in the office.”

“I don’t care.” His words were deep and heavy and you couldn’t bring yourself too either. As soon as he undid your belt he unbuttoned your pants, his hand slipping in and instantly pressing against your clothed center, his long fingers applying pressure to your pulsing core. The fabric adding friction as your hips moved with his hand. His eyes were glued to where his hand was and you lifted your hips, moaning as he pushed harder against you. “Take them off.”

He was helping you out of your pants when the two of you heard coughing to get your attention, jumping apart. There was a custodian who was looking anywhere but the two of you, his cheeks pink, “I clean this floor today.”

You fumbled with buttoning up your pants as Spencer tried his best not to laugh at your mortified face, “We’re really sorry, we didn’t know anyone else was still here.”

At this Spencer laughed and you shoved him away from you, still flustered as you grabbed your bags and made your way to leave, not being able to meet the eyes of the man who had caught the two of you.

Your thought were running a million miles in your mind but Spencer’s long fingers tangled with your and pulled you out of your spiral. “You okay?”

Your cheeks burned profusely as you waited for the elevator, “Oh come on, don’t tell me you’ve gone shy after the fact that I had my hand down your pants.”

“Spencer!” You whined and hid your face in his chest, he laugh rumbling all through his chest before he pulled you with him into the elevator. “I’m kidding, I like knowing I caused that.” His hand was rubbing softly against your cheek, his eyes flickering all over your face and he was leaning down again. His lips pressed softly onto yours and held you as close as he could, it was proving to be difficult between all the things you both were carrying. You bit down gently, pulling his lip with you and he huffed quietly, eyes closed as he savored the taste of your lips on his. “We have a lot to talk about.” He nodded and a dopey smile littered his face, “Are you tired to go out to eat?”

You shook your head no and you smiled at him as he took your hand in his again, “I know a great pizza place.”

“Sounds great, and by the way, Harry Potter is better than Star Wars.”

taglist: @swellwriting @carolinesbookworld @theboywhocriedlupin @awfulmoons @lumos-barnes @fortisfiliae @finnofamerica @beskarjedi @aperrywilliams @ta-ka-shi-ma (let me know if you’d like to be added <3)

[vivinightingale]

Hanahaki disease and Star tears head canons part 1 of 3

Hanahaki Disease: An illness born from one sided love, where the victim's throat will fill up with flowers. They will then begin to throw up, or cough up the petals. In serious cases the flowers themselves. There are only two ways to get rid of the said disease. If the person the victim loves loves them back (strong friendship isn't adequate enough) or through surgery. If neither work the victim will suffocate on the flowers resulting in death.

Star Tears: The Sparkly star-like tears, accompanied with twlinking sounds. It's a disease that is caused by unrequited love. The only cure for these glimmering tears is for the love to be returned;  however, if they are not then the light from the shining stars will blind the victim. 

Flowers mentioned: 

Tulip: Love and, Confidence 

Sunflower: Adoration, Loyalty 

Hydrangea: Emotion, Understanding 

Rosa Rchardii: and ancient Egyptian rose. (usually a sign of purity)

Lychnis

(I will be making Yami and Atem two separate identities because i believe what he use to be back then is different from what he is in the present day)

~Pharaoh Atem Hanahaki Disease:

If the Pharaoh had the disease:

He wouldn't know what hit him. The day he saw you with Mahad he felt his body temperature rise and his heart beat quickly. He never felt something like this before so he thought he became sick. How close to the truth the young Pharaoh was. 

Because you were training under Mahad you saw the young pharaoh quite often, and as time passed you even became friends, chatting like the two of you have known each other for years.

However the closer Atem got to you the more his body began to change for the worse. He woke up one morning in a coughing fit till eventually he coughed up a single white density petal. Confused, he called for the best physicians. 

When they examined him they couldn't give him a straight answer no one has ever seen something like this. So in desperation everyone turned to Mahad. Hoping that his magic could either cure the young king or give them answers.

“My Pharaoh, what you have is a  rare disease Called Hanahaki.”  recovering from his last coughing fit of blood and Tulip and sunflower petals. “What is the meaning of this disease?”

When Mahad tells him of the disease he feels his stomach drop when he hears the word death fall from his lips. Panicked Atem asks him to get rid of the disease. When that is also explained to him he begins to have an idea who has caused this disease.

He takes days to come to terms if he should say anything to you or let Mahad remove the flowers with his magic. However before he could act on any of it you caught him in the garden coughing up blood and petals from various flowers. “Are you okay my pharaoh?!” as you rush to him he panics slight and tries to turn from you but you were quick enough to catch him.

When you see him in this state you start to panic and ask him what happened. At first he tries to avoid your line of questioning, but you were persistent till he finally told you.

“I have a disease called Hanahaki...one sided love…”  you looked at him shocked. The Pharaoh loved someone who didn't love him back? How can that be? Everyone loves him!

Before you could ask him who he looked at you with those beautiful amethyst eyes that held both concern, and something else you could place. “It's you…” he turned his head and began to cough more blood petals more than before. 

Despite his coughing fit you hugged him from the side as tears sprang to your eyes “I love you Atem, i have from the day we met and i truly got to know you.” 

It took awhile for the flowers to be fully cleared up, but with you at his side he made it through.

Afters years of courting you he married you and together the both of you ruled over his kingdom in perfect harmony.

If you had the disease:

There were rumors of your great healing magic, so naturally the pharaoh and his court heard of you. You were then taken under the wings of Mahad so you could harness your healing powers. That's when you met the Pharaoh, and that's when you knew you were in trouble.

The longer you stayed in the palace with Mahad you grew closer with him and the pharaoh. The closer you got to Atem the more your feelings began to grow, and the more they grew the more sure that it was just you having these feelings.

The more time passed with the feelings inside of you, the more you began to feel the scratches in your chest till eventually you coughed up a single petal. The petal of a sunflower.

You tried your best to hide these petals from everyone else, until one day you were caught coughing up the petals by Mana. I fear she alarmed her master Mahad who then was quickly by your side with her.

“You know what this is right…?” wiping the blood off you look down “Hanahaki….the rare disease caused by one sided love….”

You were well aware of the effects of the disease and what would happen if you didn't get rid of the flowers, and honestly you contemplated if sharing your losing feelings was worth the trouble.

You took days to contemplate your situation. With disease getting worse it was harder for you to hide them. So eventually during a meeting the Pharaoh caught you coughing up the petals of sunflowers, tulips, And Rosa Richardii. Panicked, he dismissed the meeting and asked Mana to take you to your chambers. You tried to struggle against it but Atem was having none of it.

After a few hours alone in your room the Pharaoh came in with a frown etched on his face. “How long have you had this disease?” 

Once again you tried to avoid him and his line of questioning but atem was not giving up. You were special to him, and did not want anything to happen to you. 

“I've….had since the day we met….”

It took him a minute to realize the implications of your words. When he realized it he took your hand gently in his and kissed your knuckles “The let this disease haunt you no more”

Overwhelmed by feeling you hugged him tightly as he wiped away every tear, and that's when you knew everything was gonna be okay.

~Yugi Muto Star Tears:

~If Yugi had the disease

When the boy first spotted you was during the Duelist kingdom, at first he thought you were a good duelist and was immediately interested. The more time you spent with him the more his feelings towards you grew.

With these new feelings came some problems. When he was around you not only did he get nervous, clammy hands, and short of breath but, on top of all of that he began to cry star tears. The twinkling sound echoed off the empty room as Yugi tried to wipe them away.

He went for months trying to conceal these tears from everyone, but eventually he was caught one night by his grandfather.

As yugi sat in his room trying to wipe away the tears his grandfather came into his room. “Yugi? Is everything alright?” as he walked in and saw the state of his grandchild.

Mr.Muto quickly went to yugi “oh no...the star tears..” as Mr.Muto wiped away the tears he began to tell yugi of the side effects of this disease. He couldn't lose his sight! Not now! Now when the battle city tournament is so close!

Frightened, he turned to his grandfather for advice. “Your best bet is to tell this person how you feel and hope they love you back.”

Yugi didn't like taking chances, but what other choice did he have? He could lose his sight before the battle city tournament.

So with a hastily written note he asked you to meet him at the game shop at the end of the day.

After school yugi rushed home and paced around his room, he never expected to tell you like this. It felt forced, but what other choice did he have?

When you arrive at the game shop Yugi’s  grandfather shows you up to Yugi’s and knocks softly on his door. “Yugi...Your friend is here for you.” 

When you enter his room there you see Yugi standing in front of you crying uncontrollably, as bright stars that twinkle fell with his tears. “Yugi….” you muttered.

He looked off to the side as he explained the disease to you, and the side effects of it. You gasped and covered you vermouth afraid what this could mean for your friend and his upcoming matches. “Then you need to tell this person Yugi! We can't lose you!” he gave you a sadden smile “Thats what im trying to do right now.”

Your eyes widen as you slowly walk towards him, he looks off to the side feeling unsure of himself and how the outcome of this will be. Until you hugged him tightly. “I love you too.”

The star stopped flowing but the tears didn't. He was happy that not only did he not lose his eyesight, but he got the greatest gift of all. You love. 

If you ended up with the disease: 

You noticed Yugi during one of your battles during the duelist kingdom. He was simply observing you but something about the boy caught your eye. So after the battle you introduced yourself to him.

As the competition continued you grew closer with Yugi and his friends, but more importantly Yugi himself.

Even after the duelist kingdom you were close to the group of friends and yugi, However as time passed you realize that you had more feelings for Yugi then friendship .

That is when the disease hit you, as you sat on your bathroom floor tears and twinkling bright stars flood your eyes. Not knowing what to do you stayed home that day wiping away tears.

Worried Tea, Duke, and Bakura stopped by your house since you haven't answered your phone all day.They knocked  and when no one answered they walked in to see you on your floor stars and tears running down your face. 

Worried they all huddled around you. Looking closely, Bakura examined your tears and stars “Star tears….” you looked at him questiongly. Bakura explained the disease and the effects it has on you. Scared to lose your sight you asked Bakura how to cure such an aliment.

When he tells you how to prevent it, you get more anxious. You have to tell yugi how you feel. What if he doesn't accept then what? You go blind for the rest of your life?

Tea tries to calm you down telling you everything is gonna be alright, that they will figure something out in the meantime. They all stay with you trying to comfort you till it becomes late. Once they went home and you were alone you sent a text over to Yugi telling him to meet you at your house tomorrow.

You stayed home the next day as well anxiously waiting for yugi to come over. When he finally did you were both relieved and scared.  

When he saw the state you were in he was quickly at your side questions what happened. When you told him he looked perplexed

“The only way to stop these tears….is to tell you that i….love you and you return these feelings.” Yugi was quiet for longer than you are allowed to admit. “If you don't fee-” before you could finish your sentence you left soft lips on yours 

“Then i don't want to see you cry ever again okay? I'll be here to wipe them away” More tears fell down your face as you hugged him tightly  knowing you were in the safest arms in the world.

~Yami Yugi Hanahaki disease:

If yami had the disease:

When he laid eyes on you he felt like he had seen you once upon a dream. When he shared a body with Yugi he tried to fight these feelings knowing they couldn't lead him anywhere good. You were with Mako after all.

After everything, you, him, and the group his feelings for you never faded. At first they were nothing but a nuisance to him till he finally got a body of his own.

After he got a body of his own was when the flowers began to grow in his lungs. Tulip, sunflowers, roses, and hydrangea. That's when he knew….he knew there were only two ways this could end.

Yami became distant and it worried everyone, so out of worry Yugi, Joey, and Tristan psyed the former Pharaoh a visit. When they got to him, and they saw the state he was in they knew something was terribly wrong.

“I cant…” he mumbled through blood and flowers. “I can't tell them….them and Mako…” worried the boys looked among themselves before Yugi spoke up. “There is another solution..”

When Yugi mentioned surgery Yami was startled. So he either dies from the beautiful petals, or….lose all feelings for you. He couldn't bear the thought of either, but he had to do either. So in the end he chose to lose his feelings.

After the surgery he was never the same. The two of you slowly drifted apart, and unknowing to him it hurt you more than any physical wound. After High School you went with Mako to the sea always wondering what happened to Yami, but never getting your answer.

If you got the disease:

Love can hit you at any moment, and it chose to hit you when you first laid eyes on Yami and his new body. You wanted to tell him how you felt but you had your suspicions that he held feelings for tea.

Unfortunately for you, you were right. Not long after he got his body Tea and him hit off really well, and the two of them started dating not long after. That broke you more than anything.

The flowers began to flow through your lungs and out your mouth along with your blood. The same pain that was tied to your lungs was tied to your lungs. You skipped many days of school effectively worrying your friends. 

So Bakura, Yugi, and Joey went to your house to check on you. When they say you in tears, blood and petals running out your mouth. They knew things were serious. SWhen you explained the symptoms to them Bakura looked at them with worry.

“Hanahaki the one sided love disease…I've read about it in some medical books it's a rare disease, but very much real...” 

When Bakura explains the disease you grow more and more anxious. You couldn't tell Yami how you feel, and ruin not only your friendship,but his relationship with tea. “I-is there anything i can do?” When Bakura explained The two solutions you became afraid. Lose feelings or lose your friends.

In then you got the surgery, after the surgery not only did you lose feelings for Yami but you lost connection with your group of friends. Before graduation you moved away without telling anyone leaving behind your hurt friends, and a confused and hurt Yami. 

~Joey Wheeler Star Tears

If Joey had the disease:

As much as Joey likes to believe he suave when it comes to the ladies that is far from the truth especially when it comes to you. His mind goes blank, he stutters, and he can't help to get red in the face.

He knew he couldn't act on his feelings however you were already with Duke there was no way he could get in the middle of that. You were so happy…

It didn't get drastic till he began crying star tears. They were too bright and unbearable. He wanted it to stop. He called up his friends one by one seeing if anyone knew anything. Yami was the one who seemed to know more.

“They are called Star Tears. Those tears are more deadly then you are aware of.” When yami explained the disease to the Blond. When it was all explained to him he knew he was screwed.

There was no cure for this disease unless he confessed to you,and you returned his feelings. You were with Duke already so there was no way for the two of you to end up together.

He knew what he had to do even though he didn't like it...So for days he waited for the tears to stop the stars to blind his vision. He didn't like it, but he also didn't like ruining your friendship with him. 

Eventually he became blind to the world around him, it was difficult, but eventually managed. Though he could never see anyone ever again he was still happy to know that you were happy by Duke’s side.

If you caught the disease:

God where you helpless, whenever you say joey you knew you were doomed. That man may be an idiot but you loved him dearly. The only problem is he was with Mai and you knew you couldnt compete with her.

So from the side lines you watched as her and joey held googly eyes with each other, secret kisses, and hand holding. It hurt you to see them like that, but you had no other choice. You didn't have the heart to say anything.

It hurt your heart to see it but it got worse when the star tears began to flow. They got worse and worse as time went on,but you couldn't understand why. So you contacted a doctor. When you told him of your symptoms he told you of the disease, and the side effects of it.

“I'm afraid there is no cure for it, unless your one sided love is returned” 

Panicked you hung up the phone. You couldn't tell Joey how you felt that could ruin everything, besides is a fifty-fifty chance that Joey would return your feelings anyway. 

Your only choice was to wait. So that's what you did. You waited, crying the blinding tears until eventually it did take effect on you. Your sight slowly faded along with your tears leaving you in nothing but darkness.

Your friends tried their best to help you with your new predicament, but no one could help you through the loneliness you felt in the dark. 

~Request are open~

[fairynavi]

stronger than you | strong! fem! reader hcs

you are a 2nd year manager of karasuno and here are hcs on how noya, tanaka, and ennoshita react to you being physically stronger than you seem

☆ nishinoya yuu

you, along with yachi, were introduced by kiyoko as new managers for the club. you've been in the club for quite some time now and you're well acquainted with everyone now

especiall noya since the both of you are in the same year (and he's very excited about how they have a manager who's in the same year as him)

noya is just an energetic and spontaneous ball

he'll go to your classroom and shout your name so you could go to the clubroom together

you would find it very endearing if it weren't for the knowing looks your friends would give you whenever noya came by

OKAY SO

you joined in your 2nd year after leaving the martial arts club

why'd you leave? you weren't too keen on the suffocating competitive atmosphere in the club

the club president wasn't very good in keeping everyone organised

the club was overall just a mess and you didn't want to get involved in any more problems

while everyone's cleaning up, hinata and kageyama snuck to the court a bit a do extra spiking drills

you heard them bickering but you didn't actually expect they'd do anymore drills

but at this point, you weren't surprised anymore

this time, hinata went a bit all out and the ball came flying towards an unsuspecting noya who was drinking what's left of his water bottle

fortunately, you were nearby

you immediately drop whatever you were holding (which were brooms) and immediately go in front of noya, fixing your stance (like how you would during a hand to hand spar)

you use your arm and hover it steadily in front of your face where the ball was going towards

you successfully stop the ball, which you grab from the floor

you're unaware of the stares from the other people in the gym

"hinata! kageyama! be careful! you could have hurt someone!" you lecture the first years, to which they immediately apologize for (after they've completely processed what you just did)

you turn around and look at noya, who's just looking at you in awe

"noya-san? you okay there?" you wave your hand in front of him, where he finally responds by blinking

he finally processes everything, he's confused, he's blushing, he's staring at you in awe because a girl saved him?? a v v pretty girl saved him from a ball that could've hit his head??

he's just shocked, my dood

for the first time, he's at a loss for words

"earth to noya-san?"

he finally speaks

"[y/n]-san... that... that was so aWESOME! you're... i guess you were stronger than i had initially thought, y'know? thanks for saving my head there! you're so cool, [y/n]-san!"

you're blushing now too

sure, you've been called cool by other people, but it seems that when noya says it, it just feels so different

"thank you, noya-san..."

the next few days, he'll just bother you about where you got so strong and when he learns that you know martial arts, he just WANTS you to teach him some self-defense

he was already attracted to you when you joined the club as a manager

now he learns that you're actually physically stronger than you seem??

bro, he's infatuated

wait no, scratch that

he's head over heels for you

expect a lot of compliments from him

also expect a lot of, "[y/n], do you think you can carry me?"

"for the last time, noya, i am NOT carrying you"

☆ tanaka ryuunosuke

you already knew tanaka, during your 1st year, even before joining the karasuno volleyball club because of ennoshita

but you've only met with him once or twice on the rare occasions where you'd do a group project with ennoshita

you joined the volleyball club in your 2nd year as a manager for the boy's team when the club that you were previously in had disbanded due to lack of members

to everyone's surprise, tanaka recognizes you the moment you enter the gym

you quickly become well acquainted with everyone

it's been like 3 months since you've joined the club and you're comfortable with walking home with everyone

especially with tanaka since coincidentally, you live in the same neighborhood as him

this one particular day, tanaka says he'd forgotten his textbook in coach ukai's shop while you were already walking home with him

you guys weren't that far from his shop but you were already tired enough to go back with him

you let him go and retrieve his textbook, assuring that you'll be fine on your own

he runs back to the shop and you lean onto a pole nearby, waiting patiently for him

that's when two creepy men approach you and begin small talk, getting into your personal space too many times

they crossed the line when one of them tried to lift up your skirt, the other one pinning you onto the wall

before they could do anything else, you immediately go under his arm and out while it was still a bit loose and you immediately strike your hand on his nape, earning a pained groan from the man

the other one hesitated to attack you but he did, trying to punch you, but you immediately dodge, making him stumble and fall

using whatever strength you had left, with your adrenaline helping, you lift the other and drop him onto his companion, earning groans from the two of them

the moment tanaka comes back, he's immediately in front of you, in a very defensive stance, barking at the strangers

he doesn't look at you as he grabs your arms, pulling you close to him as you continue walking home

finally, he looks at you and notices the state that you are in

your blazer's unbuttoned, the blouse underneath lost the top button, your clothes are creased and your hair is just everywhere

you're sweating, still not recovering from the adrenaline rush from earlier

lowkey you look attractive rn

"[y/n]! are you okay?! are you hurt?! the hell happened back there?! did those guys try to touch you?!"

"tanaka, chill, i'm fine. just some random dudes trying to get touchy with me. nothing i can't handle"

he's relieved that you're okay and he makes sure you get home safely (ohoho what a gentleman) and once he gets everything in his head, he's in love

i mean, who wouldn't be attracted to a girl who just DESTROYED two men trying to touch her

the next day when you greet him, he's all blushy and scared because you might beat his ass if you felt like it

he later learns that you were taught self-defense at an early age and continued training up until now

tanaka will stare at you whenever you're talking with someone, hoping you wouldn't notice, but boy's just too obvious about his infatuation

the whole team probably knows his crush on you without him confirming it

☆ ennoshita chikara

you joined the volleyball club shortly after transferring to karasuno in your 2nd year

you're classmates with ennoshita, so you were relieved that you knew someone in the team

you quickly became friends with everyone on the team a few days later due to them being very friendly and kiyoko never leaving you confused during practice

once you're comfortable enough with them, you've shown your very playful side

leading you, along with noya and tanaka, to get some lectures from ennoshita

you were never one to actually do dumb things, but you always encouraged them to do the dumb thing

"im not a bad influence i swear" turns into "lmao yea, you should totally give that snake a pat"

even though you seem playful, you're still very reliable when the situation calls for it

you stopped a good amount of class fights and bickering to avoid it elevating to a physical fight

you've also stopped hinata and kageyama's bickering a few times

of course, ennoshita's noticed this and has developed an admiration to you

he didn't notice the thin line between admiration and infatuation

he finds himself staring at you a lot during practice now, always denying that he had a crush on you and just convinced himself that "i just respect her a lot"

it's currently the last day of the tokyo summer training camp, and you're helping out unloading a few more stuff that they bought

you're carrying two fairly heavy coolers, both of which are filled with refreshments

ennoshita sees you and sprints up to you, offering to help

"oh, there's no need ennoshita-kun, go ahead and eat, you should enjoy yourself"

there it is, that very sweet consideration that sends ennoshita's heart flying

"don't worry [y/n], i want to help you"

you smile and take up his offer, giving him one of the coolers

he almost droos the cooler from how heavy it was

he initially thought it wasn't at all heavy since you didn't at all look like you were having a hard time, he underestimated the weight of the cooler

you look at him in worry but then you burst into a fit of laughter, earning some attention your way

ennoshita was embarrassed as he tried to tell you to stop laughing at him

"sorry ennoshita-kun, but that was the reason i didn't want you to carry it, come on, give that back to me"

he stares at you for a bit, still not over the shock of learning how strong you actually are

you wave your hand in front of his face and he comes back to reality

"no, no, i can carry this, your shoulders might get sore, [y/n]"

AWWWW HE'S CONCERNEDD

while the both of you walk, you tell him about how you underwent some intense (somewhat unnecessary) training during middle school as you were part of the track & field club

once you deemed that the training was far too much and your body couldn't take it anymore so you quit when you went into high school

the reason you transferred was because your mom landed a job as a teacher for karasuno high

he's in awe about... just about everything about you

it's honestly not hard for him to fall for you at this point

he'll listen to you the rest of the day, wanting to get to know you more and more

when someone goes to help you carry something particularly heavy, he anticipates for their reaction over you being stronger than they are

he just loves you at this point, really

i hope i depicted them properly TwT

[badnew2005]

rehashing this post from right before s15 like. hm !!!!! first half of the post died like hoodie gate and dennis in macs room turned to be Nothing. i’m still maintaining they fucked over quarantine (SINGING HAPPY SILLY LITTLE COUNTRY LOVE SONGS ?????? country mac vs mac) but. dennis is still emotionally in north dakota. he’s still fight or flight. he’s learnt he can’t survive without mac without the gang and still had to come crawling back to philly But he’s not emotionally back. he’s not accepted he’s back and this is Who He Is. that he couldn’t survive as someone else once again. he’s terrified mac and the gang can see through him. he still wants to run. the gang go on holiday. go where PURPLE ??? that’s not a place !!! vocal stim of all time. they go to ireland back to their Roots. they’re an Irish bar. macs so aggressively american irish. let’s tell him he’s dutch. to shut him up. need to confuse him, spin him around, give him a different focus other than Me.

mac and dennis barely interact in ireland. dennis’ obsession with authenticity almost killing him. he’s trying so hard to be Real to be a Real Person. not Himself of course. someone real here. s14 health scare dennis NOT vigilant about covid ???? REFUSING to admit he had it. because it wasn’t authentic. wasn’t Real. because he spent 2020 hiding away with mac, slowly falling back into old routines, back in love back to being see through. fuck. that’s Not what ireland was for. dennis being the one to point out charlie’s dad died from covid. weird washy vision. dennis the “Only One” who didn’t get vaccinated. s14 health freak out dennis more about mac than anything else. he wanted Everything to be The Same back to when they could read eachother BUT he’s terrified of being Seen by mac. by mac who can Now see himself as gay, what the fuck is he finally going to be able to see in dennis. macs been spun around by dennis so he just goes to i’ll look after dennis Directly when he asks. i don’t want him running away from me again. also pizza poisoning. building back up that codependency. dennis needing anything else than Mac to blame all his mac problems on. Macs priest journey he’s thinking about Himself he’s Looking After Himself. not dennis. big mo should we quit the game. if you’re not having fun anymore. he’s not. everything with dennis is more Pain than anything else. being suffocated by his own love. sorry about the delusional maccricket hopes. mac and cricket ex boyfriends i’ll never stop believing in you though. macden using cricket as a middle man instead of just fucking eachother. den and charlie trying to spin him around confuse him saying he’s not irish. okay. next aspect of my identity is catholic. i’ll just go Full into that. the wars over. the storm has stopped raging. maybe. it’s complex. but it’s easier than dennis. feeling unfulfilled by the church though. this isn’t what i wanted this isn’t filling my dennis shaped hole. coming back together on the mountain. to help charlie. finding the truth. they lied to me told me i wasn’t irish just because they thought i was annoying? heartbreaking. DEVASTATING honestly. fuck you im leaving. i don’t have to help you. you’ll never help me. all i’ve been DOING is trying to Look After Myself so you wouldn’t have to. macs whole LIFE trying so desperately for someone to Love him. fuck man.

but back in the pub. mirror of paddys. we’re never escaping paddys. but why would i want to. we’re always running out into the world looking for treasures when everything we need is right here in the bar. their own ecosystem. and we carry out country (us. giggling like yeah the United States US and just. Us as a relationship) with us wherever we go! BECAUSE WE LOVE HER! and when you love someone , you can’t BEAR TO LEAVE EM BEHIND” watch dennis. face journey. he realises before mac. he loves philly he loves paddys he loves the gang he loves mac. HE CANT KEEP RUNNING AWAY. it’s okay to stop and be stationary. it’s okay to be who you are. “not ever” he’s ran away so many times. even this holiday with the gang he’s running from them. mac looks at him. mac knows. it’s okay that mac can read me that he can see through me like this. it’s good. i missed it. i’m weak and tired of running and I’m Sorry. everything i’ve done to you because i hated myself because i was scared of myself. they go to charlie. it’s the big game. they’ve embraced who they are (american) (Who They Are) and that’s when you WIN. dennis was in north dakota during the big game. wasn’t part of it. was still running. i’ve said it a thousand times sure he’s physically back in philly for years but emotionally he was still running. he’s stopped. laid down to rest.

i don’t want to hypothesise about s16 too much but after the first two eps are out i feel confident saying. the cats poking his head out of the wall. he’s missing mac. i’ve said before end of clip show SINISTER “we’re back to normal” it’s dennis’ fantasy he wants so badly to become reality. he’s the best at monitoring reality and pulling one over on the gang. because that’s all he Ever does. that’s all he’s been doing. they’ve only just caught on or directly challenged him or tried to live in their own fantasies. i don’t know if dee’s cat is fully coming out of the wall but he’s poking his head. barely saw macden apartment last season because they were running away from her. sterile. in the season Opener we saw Her Insides. the fridge. casual domesticity. throwing out all of their furniture and sleeping on a blow up bed together. he’s stopped running. when you embrace who you are then you WIN. but. macs moving on. it’s been too long. took dennis too long to adjust. that happens. i’m so scared to tinhat about johnny but. i’m still your leading man. macs got another leading man. he’s being replaced maybe. it’s me it was always me. i think we’re gonna see more of that. i have always trusted the structure. i don’t think it’s going to be fruitless. yeah i think i’m out now. he’s BACK from north dakota he’s working on himself. macden doorway in inflates mirroring macdenbreakup. we don’t need to tell you our business. he’s protecting himself protecting their relationship. he’s not getting angry anymore. working to be a person. not letting small things blow up anymore. but it’s not going to be enough. he needs to Show Mac he cares More. it’s going to be difficult but. i trust the structure

me saying i’m not going to go on tumblr for a while because like i’m Excited but it’s stressing me out so much and i do want to avoid spoilers etc etc but then naturally i go on tumblr what else am i meant to do then seeing Numerous people making vague posts ab dennis in macs room getting very confused i see one post they fucked i say what is happening i do some exploring some digging i believe it they fucked they are doing something and i am trusting the structure i know i am going to get my hopes up tahts dennis in dennis room HOWEVER . hoodiegate . mac trying to become a priest paralleling the macden breakup beginning of s6 when he . when he fights gay marriage . full jesus freak out becos they broke up .

guess what . i think they broke up . they try to go on holiday together they don’t want the gang to know they were fucking over quarantine (because there is No Way they didn’t fuck over lockdown . s14 health scare dennis scared of getting covid getting ill he doesn’t want to die he doesn’t leave the apartment and refuses to let mac leave the apartment charlie dee and frank can’t even come over . this only lasts a few weeks but still . they start fucking the sex doll . individually . passing it between them in shame . it’s embarassing . needing something like this. what’s even more embarassing is that they need eachother . it all starts again) . they can’t tell the gang . the gang knows . macden try to go on holiday to ireland to figure it out but there’s no way dee charlie and frank are letting them go alone . they need to watch this dumpster fire . they break up . of course they do . mac needs to become a priest . thinking about his ex cricket yolo . he’s the only man that can fill me up . macdennis emptiness . dennis shaped hole . my god hole . i feel so empty . there’s a hole in me the shape of you i’m so sorry . my love isn’t lost it’s all i’ve got . sunny is a love story never forget that . the hoodie . oh that goddamn hoodie . rivals only to the dennis striped blue sad jumpers . there are cats in the wall you put another one in they bond they become co dependant then that one comes out of the wall your original cat will follow soon . how long has mac been out . macs charlie’s cat dennis is dees cat this is all obvious what else could it be . but when he walks in i am loved i am loved me and my husband we are doing better it’s always been just me and him together . it’s a gift i got it for you . the rpg makes an appearance this season . macdennis aprtment main character in the entire show i need her floor plan . i’m still your leading man . it’s me it’s always been me . i thought i was out now . yeah i think i’m out now . i’m gay . i am Trusting The Structure

[theravencawsatmidnight]

Full Nest Part Four

The story so far. Hawks has found Reader with a quirk like his except she has pretty blue wings. He takes her in after saving her from a villain that is forcing quirks onto people and selling them. He helps her with the quirk while fighting his instincts at the same time only to realize how important Pretty Blue Bird is.

Niko was a down on his luck quirkless guy working a boring office job with empty promises of promotions and pay raises. He had no wife or children or friends really. He hated the Heroes and not having a quirk, he was different and he did not want to be different. Niko had spotted a flyer on his way home from work one night , it was shaking in the cold wind and had multiple staples in it that read ‘Quirk Testing. ‘Can your body handle one?’ He was curious about it , someone could give out quirks ? He had to check this out , if it worked his life would be so much better.

It worked… but not how he hoped. Niko had no control over his life now. It was not even his life anymore. It was the Gift Givers.

Niko decided to go by Khan now, he liked that name. The Gift Giver seemed to think Niko was completely gone because he was explaining his new orders to him. The quirk had some kind of control feature but all these years of Niko being down on his luck had given him a thick skin and strong consciousness . He played along for a long while with whatever he said thinking nothing of it, easy work honestly. That is.. untill…

“Make his life miserable, take her or the child. Whichever sounds funner.” Was what the Gift Giver told him over and over till Niko was saying it himself. The chance to ruin a Hero's life? He jumped at it. He wanted nothing more and that's when Khan started to take over Nikos mind more and more…

••

You and Keigo were shopping for all kinds of baby clothes and toys along with two matching cribs . Everything you picked out was super cute and everything Keigo picked out was Hero theme. He picked out some onesies that had little wings on them and a big blanket made out of the material of his jacket. You could not be happier with your life right now. Keigo saved you and helped you with your quirk . He really was everything he made himself out to be and you loved him .

The months went on and Khan kept his distance from you and Keigo. He was observing everything, mapping out his home and how far it was from the Agency, how far it was from the hideout, the hospital..

Tokoyami was not so easy to work with during those months. He knew something was up and everything was too quiet and he tried to get Hawks to pay attention but as the months went on he came to the Agency less and less to spend time with you. “I'll get to it, Toko i promise” was what he said to his sidekick.

But he never did . You were having trouble getting around even with the wings and Hawks had to help you as much as he could . He also had to set up the private clinic for the delivery. Everything was fine in his eyes, and life could not be better.

••

Nine months later.

“......keigo.”

“Yes pretty blue bird?”

“I.. my legs are wet..”

Keigo flew over from the kitchen to the couch stopping in front of you. He threw the blanket off you and reached under your dress feeling some water. You looked at eachother and before Keigo could say anything you were already looking scared .

“Sshhh..”

“Keigo .. im .. i…”

He kissed your head and picked you up in his arms. “Its okay. Ill be there the whole time.”

You held him tight whining from the contractions and movement , your wings spazzing out all over his home. Hawks bumped his balcony door open, taking off into the sky to his private clinic. Khan was sitting on the roof of the home waiting, he took off from the ground following.

It was a safe birth for the most part. You called Keigo a couple of bad names and needed a numbing shot in the back but you did it. One boy with purple wings and one girl with purple wings . Twins. Both with curly hairs the same colors as yours with a streak of dusty blond peeking out the front . The boy was born first and then the girl. They were perfect.

The doctor had wrapped the children up in blankets and handed you them before leaving . You could not be happier .. two little chicks and they were perfect..

Hawks was speechless .. for the first time in his life he had nothing to say. He was a father now , that was the only thing running through his head now.

“Keigo..”

“Pretty blue bird..”

“ will you sit with me.”

Keigo gently got on the bed with you and you handed him to two bundles of blankets so you could snuggle up with him . You were exhausted and as much as you wanted to be awake for this moment you could not keep your eyes open. It made Keigo chuckle , he kissed your head giving you the okay to take a nap.

A few hours later.

Keigo was walking around the room holding his chicks and making little coo noises at them laughing at their reactions. His son had one gold brown eye , the left one. The right one was the same color as yours. His daughter had the same eyes as you . You were just waking up but still feeling pretty out of it , it still hurt to move .

“Do you have names..?” You asked him , trying to sit up in the bed.

Keigo went over to help you and kissed your head . “Hiro and Hera .” He told you.

“Thats lovely..” you leaned on him to look at your chicks , they looked happy to see you. “Keigo, I love you. I love our chicks.”

“And i love you pretty blue bird, and our chicks as well.”

“Isn't that lovely?”

“Ow!!! KEIGO!!!”

Hawks got up off the bed handing you the children to see you reaching down to hold your leg , it had four bites in it and was bleeding. The air looked like it was moving and Khan made himself visible standing up , tail swaying slowly , his tongue was flicking around. Keigo pulled a feather sword over his shoulder but stopped when you cried out again. He looked over and his heart sank, you were suffocating , trying hard to suck in air.

“What did you do!!!” Hawks yelled flying over the bed . By now the children were crying and you were coughing.

“I poisioned her. “ he told you without batting a eye.

Keigo grabbed Khan holding the sword to his neck. “Fix.. it..”

“Kill me. And she dies. Hows it feel to have no power? Hero? The antidote is in my saliva , if i dont lick those marks shes gonna die. And i dont really feel like it. But i do feel like making a deal.”

“Ke.. i…”

He looked back fast at you and then back at Khan. He lowered his sword stepping back. “What do you want.”

“The son.”

“No.. S-something else! “ Hawks was panicking . This.. this is what Tokoyami ment…..”TAKE ME!!!”

“I want the son. The first born. Your pride and joy.” His tail swayed faster as he watched you fade in and out. Keigo looked over and dropped his sword to cup your cheeks . He had tears in his eyes and couldn't form words. You were heaving trying to say something but he could not make it out.

“Pretty… blue.. bird…”

“You've got 2 minutes. Hero.”

Keigo pressed his forehead to yours and cried with you as he spoke. “Take him….”

You felt a sting in your leg and your breathing returned just like that. You tried to look down but Hawks held you to his chest so you couldn't . You fought him crying and screaming. Your wings went nuts cutting him up . Hawks had used his feathers to shield Hera from yours and just kept apologizing… over.. and over… and over...

••

Chapter One

Chapter Two

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