#i honestly dont really like the ending
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Hair
Talia Al Ghul had let him braid her hair sometimes. Whether it was for a special event or for a holiday or just when they had time to spend together, without the threat of being overheard or interrupted.(Not that the interrupter would get away with it.) But for an hour, or however long they were granted, at least once a month. Damian Wayne didn’t have to be Ra's Al Ghul heir. He could just be Damian. Braiding his mothers hair. But mother was not around anymore. And Damian had no plans of ever being around her again. Even though he had enjoyed those days. She had been kinder then. Softer. More like a mother. But Selina had shown him what a real mother was like. And Talia had not been that. But he missed braiding hair. So his feet led him to her door.
Selina opened it on the second knock and smiled when she saw it was him. Talia had never smiled just by seeing him. He had to have done something good, something to make her proud to get her to smile at him. But Selina smiled. At him. Because he was there. “Hello kitten.” She crouched to be at his level. Another thing no one had ever done in the League. They found arrogance in their height over him. But Selina, and Bruce, and his siblings all knelt to be eye level with him. “Hello Selina.” He said back. “What do you need?” She asked, still smiling softly. What do you need? Not, what do you want? Not, not now Damian. No. What do you need so I can help you? Damian smiled and Selina lit up. “I would like to braid your hair.” He said softly. Selina stood, nodding. “You came on the perfect day.” She headed back into her room, beckoning him. Damian followed her into the very back of her room, where she pushed a panel in the wall to reveal a second room. Damian blinked. The room was painted a soft black, stars and bats and cats stenciled every so often. It had a few dark red couches and beanbags, along with a black cupboard. But the most shocking thing of all was Cass, Steph, and Babs were all seated on the couches, talking and laughing. They stopped when they spotted him, but still smiled warmly. “Hey baby bird!” Steph called, scooting to one side of her seat. “Come join me!” “No me!” Babs called, shifting as well. Cass signed a few words and Damian smiled, heading over to sit with his sister. Steph and Babs pulled a face and Cass grinned in triumph, pulling Damian onto her lap. “Hello Batladies!!” Selina grinned. “Welcome to our own personal spa room. I already did this spiel but since we have a new member, Damian Wayne, I thought I should go over it again.” She winked at Damian. “This is a place where we can talk and gossip and laugh and cry. Any emotions and rants are welcome. Vent if you’d like! Sit in silence too! No judgment. Just relaxation and girl time! Plus Damian of course!” He smiled. “We should be expecting three more guests…” she trailed off as another door opened and Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy stepped into the room.
Cass tightened her hold on Damian, just in case he wanted to attack. But he was perfectly content in her arms. “Damian, I’d like you to meet two of my best friends, Ivy and Harley.” Damian waved and Ivy and Harley gave him matching smiles. “Hey!” Steph called. “Love y’all’s hair.” The two women grinned and walked over, sitting down across from them. “Looking for ideas Steph?” Ivy mocked. Steph snorted. “Yeah right. Like I’d go fire red or crazy cotton candy.” The two women laughed and plopped down onto the sofa. “Now we just need Lois and we’ll be ready to start!” There was a knock and Lois Lane walked in. “Sorry! Am I late?” Ivy laughed. “Just on time Lane. Like always” Lois smiled. “Thanks Ivy.” She took a seat next to Babs at the girls' invitation and Selina grinned, walking over to the large cupboard. “Alright! Pick your favorite color gals and let’s start!” The cupboard was filled from bottom to top with beauty products, nail polish, hair curlers, face masks, eyelash curlers, and more. The women all jumped up, rushing to grab a color, Steph and babs climbing over the other to grab pink and Ivy and Lois arguing over the right shade of red. Selina laughed, a loud joyful thing and Damian smiled as he watched her. Cass just grinned, still sitting. Steph grabbed a hot pink and walked past, plopping a navy blue into her sister's hand. Cass smiled in thanks. Selina caught Damian’s eye and winked, beckoning him over. He slipped off Cass’s lap, walking over to her. She picked a color off the wall and knelt down, holding it out to him. “How bout it baby bird?” Damian examined the color.
She had picked a nice bright forest green. Green was his favorite color. “It’s- a bit bright.” He said slowly. “I have an idea!” Steph was next to them, looking for a bright purple. “How about-!” She pulled a few colors off the shelf then settled on two. “Here.” She squatted next to him as well. “You can put the green down as the bottom layer, then put this black layer over top. So it looks black, but then in certain lights, it’ll shine green.” Damian considered it, then nodded. “Okay.” Steph squealed and hugged him, grabbing the colors and his hand. “Perfect!” She hurried over to her couch and threw babs feet off(causing babs to shout a string of words Bruce had pretty much banned in the house) and sat Damian down instead. “Hold out your hands.” She ordered. Damian did as she asked. “You’re gonna look so good Dami!” She said, grinning. If Damian didn’t know his sister was a wonderful person who only wanted the best for him he would’ve thought she was joking. Babs blew on her bright red nails, having lost the fight for pink, and reached for a face mask. “Wanna do a mask babe?” She asked him. “It’ll cleanse your pores. Make your skin soft and clean.” Damian nodded. “Okay.” Babs grinned and Damian allowed her to apply it to his face. “Ooh!!! No he didn’t!” Harley exclaimed. Ivy gaped at Selina. The woman nodded sagely, holding a glass of champagne. Ivy had painted her nails a dark green and was doing Harley’s in a mix of pink and blue. Selina hadn’t done anything yet, but looking at her he remembered why he was here. Steph had finished his nails, still forbidding him from looking at them, and was now gently blowing on them to dry them.
“Wheres Jason by the way?” Babs asked Cass, putting curlers in her hair, a mask on her face. Cass shrugged, signing “he comes and goes.” “Todd does these?” Damian asked, looking between his sisters. Cass and Steph snorted. Babs grinned. “Oh yeah. All the time.” “He has some good gossip.” Harley drawled in her Boston accent. Ivy and Lois laughed. “Yes he does. It’s most interesting.” Selina laughed. Damian hadn’t seen her this relaxed in a while. “He’s off with his father right now.” She rolled her eyes. “Something secret.” Ivy wiggled her eyebrows, holding Harley’s hand. “Maybe he’s trying to be cute for you!” Lois said, laughing as Harley did her nails in a deep purple. Babs, Cass, and Steph were quiet. Selina gave them a look. “Maybe.”
“Alright!” Steph announced. “You can look.” Damian looked down at his nails. They were painted black, but when he rotated his wrists a bit, he could see a green shine glowing underneath. Selina came over and ooohed. “Can you do that for me too, kitten?” She asked Steph. Steph lit up. “Sure!” “Can I braid your hair while she does?” Damian interjected. Selina nodded. “Of course baby.” She sat on the ground and Steph sat between her legs, taking her hands in hers. Damian sat on the couch behind her, running his hands through her thick brown hair. As he separated the strands into sections his nails glowed every so often and he smiled, looking at them. The chatter started up again, each woman talking over the other, laughing as drinks were poured easily. Cass handed him a juice box and he smiled in thanks, stopping his braiding for a second. Selina’s hair was soft, softer than Talias, and thicker too. But it was so much fun to braid. “Wowza birdie!” Steph exclaimed, looking at Selina’s head. “Holy.” Babs muttered. “Can you do my hair next bebs?” Cass asked. Damian smiled, nodding. “Sure.” And in that moment, surrounded by the women in his family, Damian felt he now understood the true meaning of family. And from then on Selina was given the title of Mother.
(Talia became Talia)
#selina kyle#kitten#i need some cute catmom and her kittens#catwoman#bruce x selina#batcat#batfam#damian wayne#i honestly dont really like the ending#but otherwise i think its fine#🤷♀️#lemme know what you think
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Congratulations My Hero Academia for providing, possibly, the biggest and longest legit straightbaiting yet in shonen history.
Bonus points that their final chapter was released on yaoi day.
#first of all absolutely no hate to izuocha#i actually really like them together romantically or not. i love their dynamic so much#but you must know just how hilarious and absurd it is#that this series started with them crushing on each other#and then ochako's attraction to deku became an important part of her character#BUT they completely turn it around and made it about#deku's meaning as a hero and being saved#and ochakos expression of love and understanding others#like. that is legit very compelling and a beautiful relationship#but they did not become A Couple. at least- nothing confirms nor denies it#just like how a queerbait relationship would be#absolutely hilarious. i honestly love how it ended like this#doesnt mean i love the ending tho. oh boy its weird and legit bad in many areas#But this? My god I am so fucking sold.#God bless izuocha bakudeku and togachako i love you all#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#mha 430#mha spoilers#bnha spoilers#bakudeku#bkdk#tgck#togachako#i dont think I'll tag izuocha cus...im scared#i really dont hate it guys I promise I dont#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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Every day I’m haunted by the fact the boys happily swim in sewer water
Even if it’s filtered somehow there’s no way it’s not still nasty 😭 Bet they can defeat any of their villains just by accidentally giving them diseases I swear
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#bless their hearts but they’re nasty#it’s funny because like#each and every one of them has moments#where they’re a typical disgusting teenage boy#and then the next they have STANDARDS#can’t blame Leo for being so determined to go to a spa#even if he nearly licked his own foot that’s prob cleaner than anything else the boys have been up to in years 💀#thank you shelldon for all your hard work cleaning after then 🙏#they’re all gross teenage boys!!!#even Donnie he is NO exception here#bro was DRINKING A BEVERAGE while wading through sewer water he is just as gross as his bros#bro also talks with his mouth full he is no more refined than his equally gross bros fr and I love it#but yeah no way that water isn’t disgusting even filtering it would still leave grime on the walls of the sewer for yearsss#pros of them moving into an abandoned subway system is fixing their sense of smell enough to not be as gross#100% that’s part of why they didn’t mind being so filthy pre shelldon#because I mean they were literally raised in the sewers and they’re teenage boys like that’s a double whammy#THEY ALSO DONT WEAR SHOES#the few times any of them do the shoes are discarded before heading home 💀#I love them tho they are endearing anyhow#April’s immune system must be godlike just being around them fr#honestly no joke Mikey’s probably the cleanest of them all#just by virtue of being a chef#Leo I see as a mixture since he no doubt loves to pamper himself so he’s clean like#a percentage of time before he goes out and ruins his own hard work#Donnie is similar in that he’s just VERY SELECTIVE about what he thinks is too gross#Raph may be more on the stinky end but it’s not his fault he has his stinks and eats things of dubious origin(esp since his bros ate poison)#Donnie and Leo really have the gall to be sick about Raph eating the origami salami but they have no room to talk#all their villains are prob like please stay away from us we have salmonella now
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Anatomy is one of the biggest thing I need to work on, so why not do it while drawing these two fuckers.
Tried to focus just on the sketch/lineart, so no shading on this one...
#call of duty modern warfare 2#cod mw2#cod ghost#cod soap#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#cod fanart#ghostsoap#soapghost#ghoap#Incredibly homoerotic. as it should be#POV you're a FNG watching the LT go on a rampage after your Sergeant went down#only to find them like this after the fight ends#also of course they're covered in blood#honestly... should've put more of it#really dunk them in red paint yknow#also yes the next chapter of not alive nor dead will probably come out tomorrow#bc i left yall on another mean cliffhanger and i feel bad. again.#still got a lot to improve on with anatomy but i dont hate this
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North and Simon: (shaking hands on killing Simon potentially)
#detroit become human#north wr400#simon pl600#markus rk200#josh pj500#jericho is just... so funny to me as like. how they function (or dont)#like im v glad that i did a Good Job my first run and no one hated me but i also felt like a very distraught parent#in regards to how markus is just able to either hurt them (by suggestions OF THE OTHERS IN THE GROUP)#or help them because hey what the fuck i just dragged simon to safety and now north wants me to kill him#and then simon like oh no north got shot you should leave her BUT ! i saved her and made simon happy#so its like you know what they have to have some animosity but also respect#i feel like i wanna see more of north and simon being buddies ... and i might have to do that myself#but i also apologize if this is ooc for them because i really did only just play through once and got a not good end#i probably missed a lot of lore and stuff so im v sorry if im Messing Them Up#its currently just me liking their designs and vibes and hoping im not ruining other fans lives by being wrong#and i honestly dont know when north would kill simon but hes on her possible victims list#so since both of their victim lists include themselves for suicide it just reminded me of the meme#with im so mad im gonna (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health)#and it was like yeah watch north be like im gonna (well if i cant kill myself because markus said no suicide) murder someone
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atp i genuinely doooon’t care if the old guard two is the worst thing put to film i just want to see the best character of all time (andromache the scythian) and her loser henchmen and everyone’s favorite girl nile freeman again
#its not even funny anymore WHERE IS ANDY AND NORIKO!!!!!!!!!!! it was supposed to be the year of dyke drama 😞😞😞😞😞😞#like given the way they structured the first movie the second would have to be almost wholly original and differ a lot from the comic#like andy cant go thru the shit noriko puts her thru so im guessing the script would switch her out with nile getting tossed in the ocean#but that doesnt really work with norikos comic characterization (trying to get andy to see her point by making her go thru what noriko did#isnt something quynh will gaf about if andy isnt one of the immortals. andys become thr ‘vermin’ noriko hates!!!)#and given the end of the movie everyones chill with copley so joe and nickys whole subplot cant exist anymore…. idk maybe theyll switch out#copley with moose?? idc as long as we get their stupid car conversation tbh makes me laugh#honestly given the changes that would have to be made they probably just made a stupid movie and don’t want to release it. but I DONT CAREEE#its not exactly like the first one was that good i still mute it in preparation for every cringe needle drop like its a lame movie but its#genuineeeeee fun like i seriously do not care netflix give me my movie!!!#the old guard
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Pair 6/9 — Jacks of Clubs ♣️ & Hearts ♥️
#i managed to cover it up a bit but i screwed up and went out of line on the kagamines card on top 😔#i tried so hard to avoid that. and got so far. but in the end it doesnt even matter /silly#but i really like these!!! they turned out fun#no colour for their hair in the end. they shall all match#this wasnt meant to have any romantic connotations for meiluka i dodnt even realise they have hearts 😭#but honestly i dont mind it either way think what you may want to think. both work 👍#kerizart#prsk#wxs vocaloid#wxs len#wxs rin#wxs luka#wxs meiko#wxs#polysho poker set
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Waiting for an episode where Gerrard pulls Eddie and Buck into his office and tells him he doesn’t approve of couples working together.
But Buck and Eddie are like, “Okay. But what does that have to do with us?”
And Gerrard thinks they’re pretending to not be together so he won’t put in a transfer for one of them. Then, he spends the entire episode looking like an idiot slowly peering around corners, watching them from afar, and practically stalking the two to try to catch them having a moment.
The rest of the 118 tells him that they really aren’t together which only fuels Gerrard’s fire because he thinks the rest of them are in on it and trying to protect them.
Of course, Buck and Eddie and are just happy that the attention is off everyone else for a bit. But it also makes them analyze their relationship a little bit and send them both into a spiral of feelings realizations that they can’t confront until Gerrard is gone.
#by the end of the episode Gerrard is like damn. I might be homophobic but they’re making me root for gay love#which really is funny actually#everyone else is like wow Gerrard you really want them to be together#and he’s like yes. waIT NO I DONT#in a weird twist of fate. Gerrard becomes a buddie shipper#hilarious irony honestly#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#the 118#buck x eddie#911#911 show#911 abc#buddie 911#buddie headcanons
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I've been seeing a lot of criticism of lotr on booktok by various people and I would just like to say I don't want to hear it. Are there problems with the books? Sure. Is Tolkien's writing a little flowery? Sure. Is it a little slow at the beginning? Sure. Is it a little complicated and hard to connect with the characters on the first read? Maybe that's a problem people can have, I can see it. Is the worldbuilding very intense and perhaps overwhelming? Could be, especially if you're going into it with expectations from the movies. Do I want to hear any of this? Absolutely not. I don't care. I love the characters I love the world I love the plot I love the women I love the elves I love the hobbits I love the heart it has I love what it is trying to say I love that a man came out of the trenches of ww1 which most people agree was hell on earth and lost friends and wrote a story about love and friendship and kindness being the most important things in the entire world and how you don't have to be perfect to make a difference you can just try your very best and ask for help I love that up until recently it was (and by most still is) considered the best fantasy book ever written because it is!!!!!!
#sorry people can choke when they say lotr isnt the best anymore#i know its slow and a little hard to read the first time but just#i dont want to say you have to but i will say you should#you really really should#and the movies did a great job#but at the end of the day the movies are not the books#lotr#the lord of the rings#lord of the rings#jirt#tolkien#jrr tolkien#it's not like i'm telling you to slread the silm come on#honestly i think if you can get through aspiaf you can get through lotr
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do you ever think about how all you used to draw when you were 10 was ponies and that you should still know how to do that, then get an idea and proceed to draw something like these in nearly one sitting and it turns out better than any drawing you've done in the entire past month
sooo anyway does anyone have cutie mark or pony name ideas for them?? lol
#(the b girl lineups are older than a month because i procrastinated a lot on doing minor fixes. nothing i drew in the month of june 2024#is really worth showing it's all shitty doodles lmao)#bnha#class 1b#mlp#?#yui kodai#setsuna tokage#itsuka kendo#ibara shiozaki#(i love how she came out in particular! creature :3)#reiko yanagi#tikto's art#you may be wondering why pony of all people isn't here.#i did draw her! but i kind of ran out of steam so i ended up not really liking the result lol same for kinoko#anyway shoutout to elementary school me i was SO obsessed with mlp. brony stuff was one of the first things i used the internet for#and you know what. i wouldn't say it ruined me it was a pleasant experience#i just read what was basically a polish version of equestria daily and constantly checked the deviantart profile of one (1) specific artist#that i liked a lot#i did watch some weird speedpaints (yknow the horror ones) but i honestly dont remember being very bothered by them i just liked the art#i was just chilling there lurking and never actively participating due to being 10 and afraid of online strangers (good for me tbh)#i remember having an identity crisis though because can i really call myself a brony if i'm a little girl? the target audience of the show?#lmao anyway i would also draw ponies constantly and write oc fanfics (and the ocs were actually my irl friends ponified)#and i even had my own little g5 concept. good times good times#tag story time over god bless enjoy your day
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Veil
ATTACK! Equinox by @startagainaprologue ! I used a scene from Veil's mv as reference!
#ariart#isat#isat spoilers#honestly if i just know how to animate i wouldve done it for this one cuz i really want to get the entire scene where the character#hugs the shadow and it disappears like how siff and mira ended up as equinox but alas... i dont know how to animate and also#im somehow cursed in july anyway so ive just been takin things as slow as can be but nothing can stop me from wanting to#participate in artfight anyway! and also in just making art in general cuz art is fun and i aint letting the Curse stop me!
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me the minute i'm hit with over exhaustion: i need to die bc nobody needs me and im tired of pretending to be capable of being human
#screaming at my brain to go to sleep bc this is a feeling that you sleep away usually#and then it gets bwtter#i honestly wish i had someone close enough to comfortably tell this to rather than posting on here#i really need someone to put me to sleep#i really want to be someone for somebody that they enjoy putting effort for#but im incapable of intimacy .....#no matter how much i try ....my efforts feel all in vain. the best i get at is pretending i can be emotionally intimate w someone#but then i just dip.... because it all feels unfamiliar and scary and .... scary#im such a coward i cant look at myself i dont know how to live with myself honestly#im so annoying for myself#my brain feels like mush#no rather my brain feels exactly like the ending parade in satoshi kon's paprika#everything just happening all at once every line blurred#; words generated by me#vent tw#tw vent#suicide ideation
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I know we're in the era of billford but can we talk about how deeply obsessed bill is with Stan right now like holy shit. Bill - Stan parallels have been discussed before I know but like. God it's so interesting. They have so much in common and that makes the way bill talks about him so fucking insane. Bill is pushing so hard that this guy is worthless and he doesn't give a fuck about him so hard and 90% of the shit he's talking about could just as easily be said into a mirror
#honestly bill is so interesting as a villain because he has such a unique and interesting dynamic with every member of the pines family#the beef he has with this group of senior citizens and middle schoolers is so personal and fucked up man. i love it#but right now im thinking about stan specifically. the ending of tbob and the entire section on the site like shit!!!#stan lives rent free in your head huh!!!!!#anyway. dont really have very coherent thoughts about this yet just rotating it in my brain#gravity falls#the book of bill#thisisnotawebsitedotcom
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Fixing history using the power of editing and my editing skills!!
For today we have, New Titans (1980) Issue #100
✨ Wedding Special ✨
@robstarblog @robstaryeah pinging yall just in case so that this doesn't get lost in oblivion (It'd be painful since I worked 5 hours non stop on it lol)
I think the most time was taken by the final panel and adding in the finishing touches since I pretty much had to change everything to the pixel level, quite literally lol (I'm serious, I did)
Welp I hope the results were worth it! And with that, another one gets a good ending!!
I kinda didn't add sleeves in the first two panels of the final page because it didn't look good and looked janky with how I was editing it so yeah please ignore that-
#teen titans#robstar#dick grayson#koriand'r#starfire#dickkory#Changing history#using the power of editing and my own skills!#giving the good ending to characters who truly deserve it#it took me 5 hours to complete all the editing to the miniscule level#i paid attention to every detail to match each panel#it took a lot of effort but it was worth it!!#but damn man there have been so little dickkory content that I really had to search hard to get myself a suitable pic to edit out of#we have a lot barbara content with dick but barely much with Kori honestly#anw hope this is nice#self editing#also#Donot remove my watermark while reposting otherwise I'll consider it as stealing >:(#dont steal#that damn priest took so much time to edit like holy cow#I really went above and beyond to get all the details right and consistent throughout#I let my perfectionist nature manifest#but yea#now Dick and Kori can have an uninterrupted happy wedding <3#im so happy#I may try another one of these fixie thingies if I find anything^^#this was really fun to work on#i fixed canon#but fuck the actual canon#cuz most comic writers cant even do just one job right
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this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail
sorry got in character for a second
Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though
congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)
#im still not far into nemesis personally but im very much enjoying it#honestly in a weird way it feels like it's moving faster than HD did. which. is funny bc nemesis is like The gated behind item grinds quest#idk. HD was a fun slowburn where we adventured around gathering our rogues gallery before the action kicked in#nemesis on the other hand feels like im picking up halfway through a batman serial#fallen london#ask#it's WAY more fucked up right off the bat than HD was. honestly ive thought abt red honey for ages. that's so fucked up#and we LEAD with that?? Okay#definitely a horrors-filled ambition befitting caeru (the guy who's constantly going through horrors)#it really encourages you to get fucked up and freaky and in ur character's headspace at basically every step along the way#i only have HD to compare it too but HD was like. a lot more interpretative in comparison? at least to me. that's what it felt like#and i adore HD for that dont get me wrong here#HD just also waited until like. halfway through before it asked what the scoundrel actually Wanted out of its heart's desire#nemesis in comparison is right off the bat who died? who are you mourning? anguish. justice. there must be vengeance.#it's a delightfully different vibe!! i like it!!!#oh god sorry anon im doing the classic yin talking way too much in the tags thing again#i havent had much excuse to talk abt nemesis and what i think of it so far and of course its rp effects on caeru#but i do have a handful of thoughts on it#it's good. im liking it so far. it's starting very strong if nothing else. and i have no spoiler knowledge of what happens in the future#beyond the choice between rewards at the very end#and im SO curious how we'll get to that point. what horrors will we adventure through next? off we go to find out!#it's biggest glaring weakness so far is how horrendously grindy it is. and like. ive been warned and done my research ahead of time#im doing it on the same account im seeking. i knew what i was getting into. but also gots damn.#in comparison HD's 5-card lodgings and dreamgate feel like footnotes#anyway while im already way too deep into rambling did you know the honey trip gives you fate?? insane. why does it do that. hilarious even
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˖°🦇ִ ࣪𖤐
#ok .. the appt wasnt as bad as i feared. and the therapist wasnt at all as i had imagined#he was actually one of the more easy ones within the psychiatric dept i've talked to#it was still a bit uncomfortable for me to open up esp when i got certain feelings...#but... what actually was good is that when i did that he pushed just a tiny bit and remarked on it and asked my further#(which works bc he also accepted when i just didnt know what to say or didnt wanna talk abt smth)#it took 2hrs omg.. but felt like 20 minutes.#i could notice that he actually is specialized on personality disorders lol. like he actually got what i said etc (which most havent)#so yeah. not as bad as i feared at all. he was quite good to talk with. this appt didnt feel at all as bad as i thought it would#but ofc he couldnt decide immediately if they'll take me on as a patient. bc they gotta have the required team meeting and discuss etc etc#he did say that he thinks my personality disorder is definitely causing me issues and that even if they dont take me on as a patient i#still need help. so that's just nice to hear#even if bc of cutbacks and such i know that the chances of me actually getting help are slim :(#IF i do tho i wont squander it#anyway it's just nice now bc i was SO tense and stressed and scared but it went absolutely fine#and now i'll just wait until they get back to me. and i dont have any expectations or hopes that they'll accept me as a patient.#so if they dont - as i expected. if they do - nice surprise and actually a real chance for me to get help#for today i feel ok about it phew#i cant help but be anxious abt how at the end he asked me for feedback akskskskks and i was like umm i dunno...#bc it's difficult for me to talk abt a person to that person T-T#but really i wanted to saythat i thought it was really good that he sometimes asked me if he understood smth i said correctly#and explained how he interpreted smth i said. & when i was like oh idk how to explain it idk if this makes sense. he would tell me if he#didnt understand exactly but know where i was going w it etc etc. which honestly most of the therapists i've talked to have not done that#so ughh now im like.. he's one of the few ones who does that i want him to know thats a good thing why didnt i say this T-T noooooo. regret.#oh well....
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