#i hit post now i force myself not to go back and reread it for once knowing i will have to edit it a million times

[silvreflames]

i don't think i caught your name .

It  isn’t  his  fault  that  she  thinks  she  knows  better  when  it  comes  to  the  look  of  a  friendly  face.    Too  many  of  the  faces  she  is  used  to  are  made  up  only  of  masks,    never  genuine  kindness.    Certainly  never  unconditional  generosity,    always  only  with  strings  attached.

Cassian  cuts  an  intimidating  figure,    the  sort  that  determines  the  resulting  behavior  of  whomever’s  lucky  enough  to  behold  him,    but  never  so  much  to  impress  upon  her  that  he  intends  to  discomfort.    In  fact,    Nesta  is  quite  sure  that  he  is  deliberate  about  the  space  he  takes  up,    as  if  he  understands  his  own  power  and  knows  better  than  to  abuse  it.    But  even  that,    she  knows,    can  be  a  certain  sort  of  angle  with  all  the  wrong  intentions.

His  brother  speaks  highly  of  @bastardborne.    It  means  something  that  Azriel  speaks  highly  of  anyone  when  Nesta  knows  he’d  prefer  not  to  speak  at  all.    Still,    she’d  come  to  class  today  hoping  to  find  a  fault;    the  only  one  she  finds  is  that  he  smiles  too  much  and  he  behaves  far  too  nicely,    and  for  someone  who  cannot  fathom  experiencing  either  of  those  things  without  a  price,    Nesta  is  suspicious.

The  last  time  she  gave  someone  the  benefit  of  the  doubt  was  the  last  time  she  wore  her  hair  down.    Little  ringlets  curl  around  the  nape  of  her  neck  where  wispy  baby  hairs  escape  the  braid  she’s  pinned  up;    if  she  saw  the  sweaty  state  she  was  in  as  a  result  of  the  class  they’ve  just  wrapped  up,    she  would  be  horrified.    As  it  stands,    she’s  blissfully  ignorant  to  everything  that  isn’t  Cassian  grinning  down  at  her  like  she  didn’t  just  finally  stop  panting  from  the  ass  -  kicking  his  brother  just  delivered  to  her.

❝    You  didn’t  ask  for  it.    ❞  Her  face  was  in  the  tabloids  a  week  ago:    the  Archeron  black  sheep  sister  and  the  leaked  photos  that  had  shamed  her  entire  family.    She’s  done  a  fine  job  leading  everyone  to  believe  that  she  could  not  give  less  of  a  fuck,    but  she  thinks  if  Cassian  asked  her,    she  might  just  tell  him  too  much.    ( They  weren’t  really  me.    Nobody  believes  me.    I’m  not  really  like  that.    I  am  really  like  that.    Don’t  stop  smiling  at  me.    Please  stop  looking  at  me.    Ask  me  for  my  name.    Leave  me  alone. )

Nesta  takes  a  step  back  and  pretends  it’s  what  she  really  wants.    He’s  still  looking  at  her,    but  she  can  see  the  grin  deflate  around  the  edges  ( Don’t  stop  smiling  at  me.    Please  stop  looking  at  me ).    ❝    I  have  to  go.    Tell  Azriel  thanks.    ❞

DON'T SMILE AT ME. ( accepting! )

[mxdarling]

[send me a pic]

aventurine fluff post, ooc aventurine, could be read as platonic or romantic, reader is trailblazer, gn reader who uses they/them prns, mostly texting format, takes place after 2.2 trailblaze quest, spoiler free!, a bit rushed, lowercase, 1.0k wc, based on a in-game text interaction with aventurine.

[a/n; got a in-game message from aventurine and decided to write for him LOLL I couldn't resist, my writing is so rusty now i;m sorry huhuu]

you were chilling in your room, laying down with your limbs spread out on the bed, doing absolutely nothing. after the events of penacony, you were completely exhausted. the bed was too comfy to get up from, like some magnetic force pulling you into the soft texture of the mattress. it was unusual for you to be doing nothing—doing nothing would make you bored, and you hate being bored, which prompts you to do anything to make that boredom go away. so having your eyes glued to the ceiling was a new feeling to you; you weren't in the mood to bother march and dan heng with your antics, or help pom pom clean the astral express, or talk to mr. yang and himeko, no, none of that. you simply wanted to be in your room, doing nothing.

minutes have passed, and your eyes, void of excitement, continued to stare down at the ceiling. it wasn't interesting, so it was the only thing your eyes could focus on without much effort. seeing as you weren't going to do much for today, the thought of sleeping away time sounded rather pleasant to you, plus the droopiness in your eyes gave you the go signal to drift off and take a nap. as you're lured into the embraces of slumber, you almost gave in until your phone let out a buzzing noise, pulling you out of rest.

your phone stays still on the bedside table, you sit up straight and leaned over towards your phone to take a peek at the notification that has woken you up.

a: [hey friend!] a: [how's life been treating you?]

caught off guard by his sudden message you leaned back and took a second or two to recollect yourself before reaching for your phone and typing out a reply.

t: [uhh been doing okay, hbu?] a: [a new shop that opened up here on penacony—cosmic star.] a: [checking the place out, it's fun, there's a lot of interesting stuff here.] t: [you planning on buying something there?] a: [well sort of, i'm not buying for myself though] a: [actually gonna buy something for you]

you audibly let out a confused 'huh' as you read and reread his message. this is definitely a first. you knew he had the credits to buy the most expensive things imaginable due to being part of the IPC, but you didn't think he'd let you indulge in his wealth beyond his missions.

t: [wait really? like actually??] a: [yeah gonna buy you something, first i need to find what strikes your fancy] a: [there's this "horizon" series pajama is made with a material so light it feels like nothing, warm in winter, cool in summer, and extremely comfortable] a: [wearing it to sleep should considerably lessen the fatigue from travel]

you were tempted to immediately say that was the item you wanted; after all, having some new sets of pajamas would be nice. though you decided to wait until he described the other items to you, perhaps there was something you'd like even more than the pajamas.

a: [speaking of travel, these "night diamond" series gloves, they're handcrafted and limited to ninety pairs galaxy-wide, perfect for parties and special occasions]

you didn't feel much for the gloves, if you were being honest; the ones you already had were fine and very comfortable during your travels through different worlds. still, you kept the gloves in mind in case you had a change of heart.

a: [and then there's this windbreaker from the "unmanned flight" series—a timeless classic!] a: [you can wear it and stand on the edge of a cliff, listening to the flapping of its hem when the cosmic storm hits… it's because of that scene in the movie, "unmanned flight" has now become the go-to choice for a generation of the nameless and their followers.]

the windbreaker sounded fun, you thought, plus you had a feeling that he picked that item because you’re a nameless as well. though you weren't sure if it would be any use to you.

a: [now, which one do you like?]

thinking very carefully between the three items he had describe to you, trying to sort out the pros and cons of each items but you ended up getting tired of doing so—in the end you settle for the vibes each item gave off.

t: [the "horizon" pjs then] a: [that's all? are you sure?] t: [yeah i'm sure] a: [alright, i'll have it delivered to you, just don't mind the extra packages okay?]

raising an eyebrow at his rather vague message, you hear the sound of hurried footsteps approaching. suddenly, your door slides open to reveal a disheveled march out of breath. "hey! why did you order so many packages!?" march whined, still out of breath as she continued to breathe in and out to catch some air. you watched from your bed in shock as she continued to huff out for air. looking back at you, she whined once more. "hey! these are your packages. help me out over here!" quickly you got off the bed and on your feet running after march, and you helped her carry your packages into your room. you wondered if this is what he meant by 'extra packages'.

t: [how many did you ordered!?] a: [what do you mean friend?] t: [i thought you ordered just the pjs??] a: [i did! with a couple of others things of course!] t: [????] t: [what others things??] a: [why don't you check the packages to see for yourself] a: [don't forget to send me a picture!]

with a sigh of disbelief, you turned your attention to the pile of boxes sent by aventurine himself, guess you should start unboxing.

t: [sent 10 attachments.] t: [what do you think?] a: [10 pictures isn't enough my friend but oh well] a: [as expected, you look really cute in those pjs friend!]

PLEASE DO NOT COPY, REPOST, SHARE, TRANSLATE OR REUPLOAD ANY OF MY WORKS TO OTHER SITES WITHOUT MY PERMISSION + REBLOGS AND COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED.

[gemharvest]

You don't deserve this.

Hiiiii I'm not reading over this. If anything comes off disjointed/ reads weird, chalk it up to Beef being out of it. Sorry for meanies-posting but this shit comes to me. Way too easily. I'm going to scare myself out of posting if I let this sit long enough to give it a proper reread so Yeah.

Intended to be closer to that one sketch comic I did, so this isn't current-times RGBFverse. Dubious timeline placement because I probably mixed up some things that would/ wouldn't happen around the vague time this is supposed to be.

Characters: Yourself (Hit Single/ Ochre's), Beef (Mine)

-----

Eyes opening, unfocussed. Head hurt. Disoriented. Head spinning with an uncomfortable feeling. Felt almost like his head was flooded with a dense fog.

Didn’t know where he was, couldn’t remember even falling asleep. Nerves waking up before the rest of him.

Where was he..?

Beat.

Heartbeat…

It took a few moments more for Beef to realize he was being held, a head resting atop his: Yourself’s. Slow heartbeat, familiar hoodie fabric. Warmth built that let Beef know he had been there for a bit now.

He couldn’t remember how he got there. Could hardly think at all. Had he even come here on his own..? It wasn’t often he came over. Still felt nervous, like YS would decide to go back on being his big brother at any moment.

Must’ve been sung to sleep, though it was weird. Hadn’t ever knocked out this hard to singing. Maybe…

Beef was vaguely aware his brother wasn’t human. An angel, he had let slip in a moment of weakness. Weakness he had caused, because it seemed that was all he was good at.

Oh, everything spun more as he thought about that. He still felt so bad about that.

Still… maybe that was it. That he had let some angelic magic slip into his singing. But… why?

Why waste that on him..?

So much activity in his head, while only still just waking up. The other’s embrace should be comforting. It usually was, but… He felt off. Felt guilty. He…

He didn’t belong here.

Didn’t belong, yet only froze. Didn’t push away. Like if he moved, reality would catch up to him and he’d be tossed away. Like trash, like he truly deserved.

Greedy, he must’ve been. He was, actually. Didn’t deserve this treatment, not with everything he had done to YS. Only giving back pain to someone who treated him with such kindness. And yet, there he was, soaking it up yet again. Taking it like it was his right, and not something he should have to earn.

It wasn’t right. Wasn’t fair to YS. He was an asshole, assholes like him didn’t deserve to be given kindness like this. He should just… leave.

But he couldn’t.

Selfish motherfucker…

“Hey, little man… You alright..?”

Beef swore he’d never felt his adrenaline spike as bad as that moment. Muscles tense, and his heart had never beat faster.

Of course he was awake. He usually was. Could probably feel Beef’s emotions sour even if he wasn’t.

God, he didn’t need to be another problem.

So he tried ignoring how he felt. Tried to force his mind into a state of numbness, so he could pretend everything was fine. Pretend he was okay so he could have a few more moments before YS finally realized what a waste it was to try and comfort him.

But that didn’t exactly work; his body shaking and eyes starting to wet. The more he tried not focusing, the worse it got.

God, no, not again. Didn’t want to be discarded again. He was being too much, he would always be too much, he-

Gently, the arms around him squeezed. Body wrapping around him to keep him close.

“It’s okay, you’re okay. You’ve had a rough day, no need to pretend you haven’t. You can stay here as long as you need.”

As if on queue, Beef broke out into a silent sob. Eyes blurring again but this time with tears.

He hadn’t the faintest idea what was going on. It was scary how out of it he felt. But it was like YS felt not only his emotions, but was reading his mind as well. Scared, so scared he was going to be pushed away.

But YS only held him closer. Spoke to him with a tenderness that still felt a bit foreign to Beef.

He shook as he drew in a ragged breath, breaking a little more as he continued to cry.

Through his storm of emotion, he wondered if he had been crying before he had fallen asleep, too. It would explain why his head hurt so much. God, he hated crying.

“S-Sorry…”

His voice was wobbly, weak… pathetic. This was stupid. He was stupid, adding on to others’ problems. Shouldn’t let this side show. He was just gonna-

“Don’t apologize. If you need to let it out, let it out. I’m here.”

Dizzy, he felt dizzy. Just crying as his brother held onto him. He was a difficult person to care about; a problem child, if you would. He was just eating up YS’s patience like this. Patience he hadn’t even earned in the first place.

Gentle humming hit Beef’s ears, a melody he recognized. His song. Something special, just for him. He didn’t feel that important, but…

Beef let himself focus on the melody. Anything was better than the storm in his own mind.

Maybe he didn’t feel important enough to deserve that kind of recognition, but he still accepted it. Let himself be lulled by YS’s voice and the sentiment behind it.

Soon enough, his tears slowed, and the ache that had accompanied them died down a bit.

God, he was tired.

Breathing slowing, he let his stinging eyes slip shut. Gentle pressure, contact that told him he wasn’t alone. He wouldn’t be alone. He could doze off again if he wanted…

Greedy. He was greedy, letting himself fall back asleep here. And yet, he still did. Dizziness slowed as he focussed on all the outside stimuli he was being given.

He could be thrown away so easily. YS didn’t have to entertain this, but he was. So Beef would be greedy, as long as it was being offered to him. Felt like it wouldn’t be long until it was taken away anyways. Might as well savor it now.

Still… he didn’t want to be ungrateful.

With the last ounce of strength he had before exhaustion claimed him again, Beef sighed out two words.

“Thank you…”

[iamheretoyell]

good MORNING

well, early afternoon

I'm exhausted and freezing. I need to be rescued from nyc. Fucking hate it here. Way too cold.

Also, I'm working on Revelations as I procrastinate homework and wait for more work stuff to happen<#

Chapter 7 of Revelations is DONE!!!!

Fun 4:13 update,

I will likely be crashing out over this for the next 3-6 business days.

Because what do YOU MEANNNNNN

5:37: I started writing it before I have to go on a quest and I'm actually not alright LMFAOOOOOO

11:07, I just got back from my quest, up one extra large bag of shaqalicious xl gummies (this is the one thing I fucking love about America ngl) and am ready to write. The only problem is I read one fucking sentence on my way to post this and it just forced me back into my k2 kick. And considering I am MID kenny/clyde arc on Revelations I just do not see me finishing chapter eight tonight. So now I'm about to go through a folder of like 6,000 (realistically, I think it's like 25) wips and look at all the ones that have k2 and build on one of those.

(no one jinx me I might write a bound chapter. I haven't gotten back on it because actually writing a chapter for bound is so much gd work. Like, I gotta draw a whole fucking map, run them through the map, write them getting through the rooms without it being boring, WRITE NEW DIALOGUE THAT HASNT HAPPENED YET, WRITE THE BOSS FIGHT WITHOUT IT BEING TOO EASY OR TOO BORING, and yk. Make it fucking readable??? and like, within a good amount of words??????? Like, I really fucked myself deciding to do the delirium fight, but that might actually be my favorite part of the entire fic so I don't regret writing it. Also I used my one get out of floor free card (and I am very happy with how it turned out so I'm not complaining). I know it sounds like I'm talking myself out of this but lowk I just closed all my docs and opened it up bc now I have to reread the whole thing. Oh also, I don't really give a shit if my one cushion chapter gets posted atp. Expect another bound chapter next week and if I don't post it, someone scream at me. THANKS!)

11:33, I lied, I just wrote a very important conversation between Kenny and Clyde bc idiot inspiration truck hit stupid little idiot brain. NOW BACK TO K2 NONSENSE

(I genuinely wish one of my diehard void readers was a k2 girlie LIKE WHY DO Y'ALL HATE THEM SO MUCH LMFAOOOOO)

11:48, I'm actually giggling over their intro dialogue in Bound like idk what the fuck I was on about writing this but Kenny is so funny in this I'm fucking dead

[raging-violets]

2. Do you read/reread your own fics?

3. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

4. How many WIPs do you have right now?

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write?

7. How many ideas for fics do you have right now?

15. How do you come up with titles for your fics/chapters?

16. At what point in the process do you come up with titles?

19. Give us a small teaser from one of your WIPs.

20. What’s a favorite title for a fic you’ve written?

21. Have you ever deleted an entire scene after spending hours laboring over it? If so, why?

22. Do you know how your fic will end before you start writing?

Fanfic Writer Asks | Ask Box

Riley's answers:

2. Do you read/reread your own fics? – I do, so I can remember what it was that I was going to do before I stopped writing it for whatever reason I did, lol. Otherwise, I re-read it if I haven't in a while simply because I enjoyed it. Also, I'm reading it as I'm writing it so there's no way I'm not reading it, if that makes sense.

3. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written? – Well, this is hard considering I have over so many of them that are finished that are posted online, so many that are finished that will never see the light of day other than between myself and my sisters, and also in that there's more than that from those I deleted over previous years. BUT it's any of The Flash and the Flame series (The Flash), and of my Elementals series (SLOZAC/SLOD), The Can't Help It Series (SLOZAC/SLOD), and any of my Big Time Rush ones, I honestly can't choose just one.

4. How many WIPs do you have right now? – 100+

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write? – My idea of a Bit Beast War for Beyblade and my idea for Teen Wolf of a mythical creature hit list. I will never write them.

7. How many ideas for fics do you have right now? – *Checks Notes* Over 30 across multiple fandoms.

15. How do you come up with titles for your fics/chapters? – It's either a play on the theme to the fic, a play on words, or it's a play on a idiom.

16. At what point in the process do you come up with titles? – At the very end. Most of my documents are titled [insert title here] until I come up with it.

19. Give us a small teaser from one of your WIPs. – From the next chapter of "The Night Witch" (Narnia)

“I don’t know, I think she has something there. I mean, Jadis was known as the White Witch. She had powers all over the realm of cryogenics,” Susan explained. She looked to Edmund and Peter and added, “Ice and winter,” as if explaining something to a child. Both of her brothers gave her exasperated looks in response. “We’ve all heard the stories from Professor Kirke…of her immortality.” “And then Nikabrik, the hag, and the werewolf tried to bring her back,” Peter agreed. “Her body may be gone but…” he swallowed hard. “That doesn’t mean her life is.” “You said the powers were like hers…but not exact. Lu, what did you mean?” “Exactly as I said. There’s another witch out there, the magical powers…I can feel it. Professor Kirke explained it me, when he told us stories of his uncle and what happened with him and Polly. I know the feeling of that magic; I can sense it. It’s similar but is the strongest at night. Just as Jadis was strongest in winter…she was the White Witch, and this one…” “Is a Night Witch,” Edmund finished for her. He shrugged in light appreciation. “Good name.”

20. What’s a favorite title for a fic you’ve written? – “Whatever It Takes (To Get Me Out Of Here)” for my Degrassi fic...which I really need to get back to.

21. Have you ever deleted an entire scene after spending hours laboring over it? If so, why? – Yep, all the time, and it's mostly because something about it isn't working and I can't force it to work.

22. Do you know how your fic will end before you start writing? – I usually know the end line/the end scene of a fic before I write anything else of it. So, I come up with the end before I come up with the plot and work my way into how to make the end make sense.

-

Rhuben's answers:

2. Do you read/reread your own fics? – Yes! Most of the time it’s to remind myself what idea I’ve already done, or where I am in a fic I’m currently writing because it’s been so long since I updated it, but yes. A lot of it is cringy, but it’s also fun! A lot of the time I can remember where I was in my life at the time I wrote it, or I can pinpoint what inspired me to write it in the first place.

3. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written? – As far as completed ones go, probably my Flash fanfic (In a Flash) or my Big Time Rush fanfic (Never Again). They were the first two “big” ones I’d say I did from start to finish that I felt was complete in terms of what beats I wanted to hit, what tones, the characterization, and everything really felt like it came together. (I do have a bad habit of starting fics and never finishing them, or just silently deleting them, or just going with a new WIP as soon as I get that idea).

4. How many WIPs do you have right now? – A LOT! Is the short answer. But that also depends on what you mean by WIP. Did I actually start writing out parts or just open a document and just dump my base ideas? Counting them, 50+

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write? – Honestly, probably my SSX 3 fanfic about Skye Simms and her best friend (my OC) competing for a wild card spot into the circuit for that year. My OC gets it for that game iteration and realizes how out of her depth she is as her base sport is wakeboarding. I’ve been really into this idea for a looooooooooong time, but don’t know if I’ll ever actually do it.

7. How many ideas for fics do you have right now? – I always have idea for fics. It could be new ideas or just different ways to write the same trope for the bajillionth time. But, I have ideas for: Digimon, Pokemon, SSX 3, Beyblade, Kingdom Hearts, Miraculous Ladybug, Power Rangers, The Artful Dodger, Young Justice, Mighty Ducks, Superstore/Big Time Rush crossover, The Flash/Criminal Minds crossover, Chicago Fire/Chicago PD, X-Men (movies), and more I’m forgetting as I think of this off the top of my head. (And that's just for things I'd post online.)

15. How do you come up with titles for your fics/chapters? – 9 times out of 10 it’s a song title or a lyric. I’m listening to music allll theeeee timmeeee and tend to get stuck on certain phrases that just latches on to my brain. Otherwise, it’s titles from episodes of other shows, or random book titles I come across.

16. At what point in the process do you come up with titles? – If I don’t already have an idea for the series/fanfic title, it’ll usually come as I’m writing up the (FFN/full-length) summary of the fanfic because I like to try and have something quippy or punny or clever in the summary that goes along with the title or the overarching plot.

19. Give us a small teaser from one of your WIPs. – From my DC’s Stargirl fic, “Collateral Damage”

“If my parents catch me eating this, they’ll ground me into dust.” Still, Artemis Crock quickly removed the plastic from the Twinkie in her hands and took a large bite of the spongy treat. Her eyes fell shut, and a smile graced the curve of her lips as she chewed. “But, it’s so good,” Connie Sinclair said, using her finger to wipe away the glob of cream oozing out of the Twinkie in her own hand. She licked the cream off her finger and sighed. “Mmmm.” “Tell me about it,” Artemis said, her words barely managing to tumble out of her mouth before she took a second bite.

20. What’s a favorite title for a fic you’ve written? – “Silent Pages, Loud Words.” It’s the title of a Big Time Rush one-shot focusing on Kendall, but I always really felt something deep with that phrase.

21. Have you ever deleted an entire scene after spending hours laboring over it? If so, why? – YES!! All the time! Mostly it’s because by the time I write the stuff around it, it doesn’t fit with the tone of the chapter anymore. There’s a section from my Flash fanfic “Out of Focus” where Iris West is supposed to spend time with her estranged mother without her knowing about it, and I’ve tried to fit that in the past four chapters, and it still doesn’t work and I keep moving it somewhere else.

22. Do you know how your fic will end before you start writing? – Yes; A lot of the time, the ending is one of the things I write right after the first chapter. Recently, a lot of my fics are like “novelizations” of the movie/tv series they’re based off of, so I know how it ends canonically, but it’s how it’d change regarding my OC that makes it fun to write the different stuff. I already have the ending to my Criminal Minds fic (which I REALLY need to get back to) written and ready to go.

[asexualzoro]

it’s my 22nd birthday today, and you know what that means... 

Lew Writes Wrapped 2022!

its virtually all third life this time, most of which have not been posted on main before. woe, the full weight of my third life obsession be upon ye

blood god, mortal red

(Jan, 1.2k, DSMP, oneshot) (link)

one of the Many minecraft execution fics i have written in my life, technoblade anvil edition

not to start this post off with making myself sad, but man, i miss him. 

i remember writing this one all in one sitting at work in january. i think i did a pretty good job with it from an artistic standpoint, and as an analytical piece, i think i hit the mark perfectly. that said, i don’t think i could reread it now. i do think it was fun as a writing exercise to force like, 5 seconds irl to stretch out into a thousand words

yes, the only way out is down

(April, 1.2k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

another minecraft execution fic, third life rendog edition! 

IM SO PROUD OF THIS ONE. im so fond of it it’s probably my favorite third life oneshot. ren’s execution makes me fucking rabid and this is just the most direct expression of that.

what’s funny is i actually remember being pretty dissatisfied with this fic when i finished it--there was a lot of stuff i wanted to hit on that i just couldnt swing around to--but when i stepped away from what i wanted it to be and looked at what it was, i realized i liked it a lot

the rhythm of cold fists

(May, 2.6k, 3L, onehsot) (link)

sometimes you get so worked up about the idea scar threw the finale of third life that you have to write a bunch of frenzied words on it

this one is funny bc i think its got the second most hits of any of my third life fic, but the comment number is really low comparatively. i mostly just had fun making the transcript of this scene and then fleshing that out into a full ‘novelization,’ it was a neat writing exercise! i don’t think anything in particular stands out about this one, but i’m happy with it overall

Wooden Mausoleum

(May, 3.8k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

Sometimes you get so worked up about the idea of the unactualized betrayal plotline of the most loyal man in the series that you have to write a bunch of frenzied words about it

okay this is going to sound bad but i keep forgetting i wrote this. i dont know why. i like this fic! one of my favorite paragraphs i wrote all year is in it! and yet??? i dunno.

id love to write a different martyn wins au where the betrayal isnt the sort of ‘mercy kill’ suggested in this fic, bc i still have not recovered from the unrealized betrayal plot. someday i’ll write a martyn wins au where he Means to win

i... still feel something is sort of off with the way this fic ends, but i think ive felt that about a lot of the fic/scene endings ive written of late. i think that ending scenes/fics is just ill have to work on this upcoming year! 

might be best to not look back

(Oct, 2.7k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

i’m starting to think all my oneshots are just me getting possessed by different parts of the third life. anyway i had a point to prove about scar throwing, and what might happen were he not being wildly unsubtle about throwing

i can write essays on this fic it makes me feel insane. i HAVE written an essay on it already just recently. tbh, this fic itself IS an essay written for the purpose of analyzing the penultimate third life scene. i have and could and will write more essays on the penultimate third life. this is all i have to say to avoid making this a 1k word post

i think i did what i wanted to pretty well? it was sort of confusing, by virtue of trying to talk about a point your viewpoint character won’t acknowledge, but it was a fun piece over all

missing or obstructed

(Oct-present, 6.3k, 3L, ongoing) (link) 

post third life fic but only grian and ren remember, featuring so many sleep/dreaming metaphors, because i lucid dream and have insomnia and it does a lot to me as a person

missing or obstructed has 14.7k words written but i havent fuckin posted most of it bc i got derailed by lamplight. missing i am so sorry i miss you so much but youve been obstructed. i am really excited for how the rest of this goes but i think i have to finish and completely exorcize lamplight from my head before i can go back to it in earnest. i DID post another chapter at 10pm yesterday so i had more of it to include in this wordcount tho,

missing or obstructed has been a lot of fun to write bc i lvoe stupid metaphors. it has sucked to write because it’s forced me to come up with worldbuilding shit for the watchers which has been so much more difficult than i thought. it’s been fun again cuz i love worldbuilding. it’ll be super fun when i finish the current scene i’m sitting and get to introduce martyn pov. i lvoe writing Martyn pov

Lamplight AU

(Nov-present, 20k, 3L/LL, series) (link)

renchanting dnd au. i put ren in a lantern. what else do you need

wadda hell. 

i cannot even begin to like--lamplight was literally supposed to be just 20 Questions and thats it, i wasn’t going to write more, but people liked it so much that i was like “sure, i’ll write a bit more” and you guys have been??? so kind. the amount of enthusiasm this fic has received thru kind tags/comments, asks and interest, and even art??? is equal parts deeply humbling and also incredibly likely to give me a god complex. this fic has been so much fun to write and my readers are the whole reason, i cant wait to show you what i have in store for the rest of it

six sentence sunday challenge

i also started a challenge back at the end of march of this year over on @driflew called Six Sentence Sunday. the rules are simple: every sunday, post six sentences you wrote that week.

i didn’t make it every week, but i made it a great deal of them. on occasion, i even posted 12 sentences the week after missing my six, meaning some weeks counted for two.

my six sentence sunday tag on that blog has 28 posts from the year! considering there’s only 52 weeks in a year, i started three months late, and a few of those weeks are actually two, i feel pretty good about the amount of weeks i made. not every week, but basically any week i didn’t have a good excuse not to complete my six sentences. it kept me writing all year, if only a little bit at a time, and i’ll be keeping up with it for sure!

to finish out,

i passed my writing amount from last year (25k) by over 10k words! my total number for this year doesnt even count the 7k or so from missing or obstructed i havent posted, plus an uncounted few hundred words of unposted snippets for lamplight. i’m really happy with everything i’ve done this year! 

which… this year i wrote and posted 37,800+ words! 

thank you to everyone who has supported my writing all year, as always, it means the world to me. happy birthday to me, and thank you to you for reading! 

(birthday wishes and/or reblogs appreciated!)

[gorbo-longstocking]

ahhhhhhh you did a third chapter *already*?!? youre so amazing. im super psyched about all the new stuff, but ive got to reread the old stuff first to catch up. prob gonna cheat and read the new chapter of your new story before bed though. i adore your writing. sorry akward gushing. just wanted to leave you a comment. have a great day!

OMG HUSH IM NOT THAT GREAT 🥹🥹 its solely the power of actually being medicated for adhd that gives me the strength i have to churn out chapters like i do. when i first started writing, i was only able to finish a chapter a week because my executive function was so bad. im not gonna be able to keep this pace because my vacations over in like… two days and i go back to work soon. ive never worked and written before in my life, so itll be interesting to see how i juggle it. hopefully well enough.

funny story. chapter four is technically already done, save for a few minor edits i have been procrastinating on making. i plan on working on chapter five tonight though!! i dont have a beta reader right now, so i tend to second guess stuff before i post it. over analyzing is my game, lol. ill have something done and have to hype myself up for a bit before i can force myself to hit post.

and im super psyched that youre super psyched! a part of me was really worried that when i came back to the fandom no one would remember me. or like, my writing style would be too different, or i wouldnt be able to capture the characterizations i did before. its really nice to see familiar faces in comment sections or hear from people on tumblr who stuck around after i was gone so long.

if anyone is awkwardly rambling here its me. this ask totally made my day so never apologize for being sweet on anon!! i would hug you if i could (with your permission of course) i hope you enjoy reading through my older stuff <33 you have a great day too!!

[euphor1a]

💞 & 🍭 hiiiiii~~~ ☺️👋🏻

Moon!! Hihi 🥺, thank you for the ask!

💞 what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language.

→ Whoo boy 🤓, I’m gonna ramble a lot so hold awn! First of all, I think all the aspects of writing are pretty important, but since we are humans, we are bound to have favorites and preferences. And I’m one of them! I think I focus on the plot, characters and worldbuilding almost equally, but I do tend to prioritize characterization more than often 🤭! I think it majorly comes from the fact that I, as a reader, try to connect with characters and put myself in their shoes. So yeah 🙈! Also, plot is definitely another important aspect I try to focus on (even if I’m writing straight up p*rn 😭)! You will find some sort of plot even in my thirst drabbles kshdbjdk. I just think it’s hard for me to keep the plot ambiguous because when I’m planning, I do have specifics in my mind for that certain fic. On that note, worldbuilding is something that I enjoy, but it can be seen in some specific works only. I think in my imagination when I’m planning out fics, I focus on worldbuilding a lot, but sadly, it’s not that prevalent once I start typing 🤕. The technical stuff... I’m actually very self-conscious about grammar & other errors. And that hits me especially hard after posting something. So like, I read and reread fics like a madman after posting, just in case I left some embarassing mistake 😭! If I find any, I fix them immediately and hope that no one noticed it kshdbjdk. Figurative language though... It’s kinda hard to tell because I never use it consciously(?) If that makes sense! As I mentioned before, my grip on English isn’t good enough for such writing qualities and my style is relatively simple and straightforward. But sometimes, I do get poetic while explaining emotions and such.

🍭 why did you start writing?

→ Uhhhhhh this isn’t exactly gonna be sunshine and rainbows. So tw//// just in case!!

I think I was 16-ish when I started writing, as far as I can remember. And it was purely an emotional let out to me. Back then, I was growing up in an environment that was toxic and abusive, and I was a very scarred human being who was forced to mature at a very early age. My writing used to be extremely, extremely angsty, reflecting the pain, anger and helplessness I felt. All my works used to have this similar base of either betrayal, trauma, depression, heartbreak and other similar experiences. It’s crazy to think that I was churning out chapters after chapters without any of the problems I face now. But then again, I’d really rather not go back in that place. Now, I just write for funsies (mostly)! Sure, there are times when I write to process difficult emotions because I know writing it out can help me, but that’s not so often.

— let’s get real! fic writer asks ✉️ ( inbox )

[echo-bleu]

Writing thoughts

I've been in something like writing limbo since the start of the year. Wordcount-wise, I've written about as much in three months as I often do in one (45k), and I've had more days of no writing at all than I've had since, uh. 2018, or thereabout. It's a combination of work picking up and tiring me out, and being kind of confused about what fandom I'm currently in xD

What I wouldn't do to be a full time writer, though.

The truth is, I've found myself at a loss, procrastinating, aimlessly scrolling, and generally doing nothing (aside from rereading LOTR on my usual writing/drawing time). While it's certainly needed at time to not be productive, it's not actually good for my mental health right now, so I'm going to give myself a bit of a motivation boost and sign up for Camp NaNo with a 40k goal. It's okay if I don't meet it, but it's a fairly reasonable goal for me and it will force me to at least attempt to write every day. I'm here, if anyone wants to be buddies.

I've hit a bit of a burnout regarding Witcher, and at the same time I got (back) into LOTR and started thinking about fics there but I'm not fully in, so to say, so this will be episode #TooMany of 'Echo tries to juggle two fandoms at the same time'. For the record, every other episode failed miserably.

Things I want to write (at least bits of):

Original short story that will remain a mystery for now: it's going to be fairly short and it's well in progress already, with a full plot and a deadline, so it's the priority.

Witcher fics: - that thunder in your lungs: I was steadily writing the main fic of this series when things went sideways... And I have far too many ideas for the rest of it. - for all the things that drum: Again, many ideas! The priority is the sequel to Dandelion Season where Jaskier's powers are actually explained, but then the rest of the series will be after his jump back in time. - if your voice begins to crack: I need to sort through the writing I already have to see what can be posted, because it's a shame that it's all just sitting there waiting for a part I'm struggling with. And then write said part, hopefully. - left you behind just standing there: I have four chapters ready to go, I just need to get my ass into gear and write out the rest.

LOTR fics: - Long fic that's probably too niche for anyone to read, but I'm stoked about it, and I'd like to at least properly plot it out. It's a heist! It's dark and angsty! Sauron has the Ring! It's very fucked up but I love it. - I have started two different parts of a series of Faramir-centric fics set post-canon, that include a variety of queer and disabled characters and a lot of recovering and trying to heal from trauma. Less high-stakes, they'll mostly be short-ish one-shots, hopefully.

Singer Street. My poor poor original novel that I keep putting on the backburner. Would be really nice if I managed to get back into that one.

[pokemon-teacology]

Heyyyy, guess who landed herself in the hospital 🤪

It's me, I did that

I'm okay! Not in any danger and honestly not really hurt that much, I'm okay to keep going to class and I'll be right as rain within a month or so.

But... Uh...

Okay so, remember the whole thing with my two psychic types? Ralter and Flambé have both been fighting Real Bad since they evolved, and honestly since the start of last semester it's gotten pretty awful. So I've been trying more and more extreme measures to get them to get along! But nothing's been working, so I've been wracking my brain for strategies to get them to tolerate one another.

As I was looking through some of my older posts, I came across one in which I sent an ask to someone asking for advice, and they told me that it's likely that the two mons are trying to protect me, and are fighting over who's more capable. I kinda dismissed it at the time, since I considered Chomp as the leader of my Mons and kinda the default protector, and I knew that flambé and ralter respected that, but it was kind of my only option by the time I was rereading.

S o

What I did was that I got my friends (the ones from back home who also go to Naruva) to stand in a circle with their Pokémon, with myself and my two mons in the middle. What I then had my friends do was fire off attacks pointed at my direction while I stood still (we agreed that their Mons would aim for like just past my head or my feet. i specifically didnt move so that there was less of a chance of me getting hit). It was then Ralter and Flambé's job to work Together to defend against the attacks.

They did really well at it, too! After a few minutes of arguing, a wave of razor leaf "almost got me", which got them to stop arguing and start defending again. They seemed to actually kinda enjoy the exercise and got into a really good rhythm. Usually, when they do double battles, they argue too much to get anything done, but I figure now that they had something to protect and Had to work together, they wanted to make it work more.

It went on for like,,, 30 minutes??? Before I called a time-out so that the Mons could take a break, since everyone was looking kinda tired and/or thirsty.

Usually, when we call time-out in the battle club we go to (me and my Mons), everything stops immediately as soon as the whistle blows, so Ralter and Flambé put down their guard straight away, as they were trained to do. What we didn't account for, however, was my buddy's newly-caught pachirisu not quite getting the memo, and continuing to fire attacks. So what I didn't expect, as I started walking to leave the circle, was a full-force electroball hitting me square in the chest.

Which! I just want to say this was absolutely not the mon's fault, it'd just been caught and isn't used to stuff like this. I should have been a bit more cautious and waited for my friends to recall their Pokémon before I started walking, that was my bad completely.

But anyway, it winded me and kinda knocked me to the ground, whoops :/ I managed to hit my head on the way down, too, so my friends called me an ambulance just in case something was wrong.

I've got a mild (very mild!) Concussion and my ribs are bruised, but other than that I got off scot-free! Which is good, considering it was an electric-type attack, so I was expecting to be shocked pretty bad. But! I'm good! They've got me on pain meds, and I'm going to stay here in the hospital for a night of observation before they send me back. Other than some pain while breathing and instructions to rest up and not exert my chest too much, as well as not drinking alcohol while the (again, very mild, totally okay!!!) concussion heals up, I'm totally okay to keep going to class and doing practicals. I'll just have my Mons help me out a little more while im on field trips.

Ralter and Flambé, bless their hearts, have been by my side the entire time. I feel terrible for making them worry like this :( usually I'd recall my Pokémon in a hospital or other government building, but I couldn't bear to do that to them right now, I think they need to be able to see that I'm doing good, y'know?? I've been reassuring them that it wasn't their fault, and that they did Such a good job of protecting me. They'd known it was an exercise and that I wasn't in any real danger, which let them have fun with it, but now that ive actually gotten hrut it seems to have spooked them both kinda bad. I think, once I get back tomorrow, I'm going to have a proper stay-at-home day with my mons in the house, so we can all have a cwtch and chill out after today.

But again! Totally okay, I'm not in any danger or much pain, the pachirisu isnt in any trouble whatsoever, I've got meds and I'm on the road to recovery thanks to the staff at the hospital <33 I just thought I'd give a little update and laugh a little at my silly mistakes.

[winderlylandchime]

I'm not anon, but I saw you had anons about your glorious story and I had to force myself to stop reading anyone else's thoughts, as I wanted my own to be true. So I stopped my Tumblr scroll and focused on notepad and my comment on your story. I'm down for being influenced when things are good, and I can't wait to scroll back up and read, and I'm willing to bet so many similar things were said and shared.

I kinda left the longest and dumb (sincere!) comment ever on the story and I stand by it all.

And again, thank you for writing that. It was such a good universe you created that hit all the good notes and so perfectly in tune with the core of these characters.

You took care and fleshed out everyone in such a good and cohesive way. There were jokes, there was history, there was love, there was sex, there was community, there was giving a shit, there was recovery, there was...actual life.

Hand to whatever God(s), it will be a thing I read over and over again. I will even edit my A03 bookmark to it so it relates the same thing.

And now I'm going to read the anon messages about such a glorious story. <3

Hello dear mariunnn!

I was falling asleep when that beloved dopamine hit of an email from AO3 came in with your comment. Now that I’m awake (and I’m having my coffee - two separate levels of awakeness) I can’t wait to reread it.

I’m so glad you liked chapter 12. To be perfectly honest, this was the chapter in my outline that had the least detail and just said “Justin comes back, they talk, they get together for real.” And where I thought I was going with it turned out to be completely different. I had a sense of wanting to use the suits and the sketches to communicate something so I also knew part of it had to be from Justin’s POV.

Then I went on a 5 day silent retreat and I wasn’t reading or watching TV before bed so I had plenty of time to think and the idea of this type of tour around gay Pittsburgh was born. I didn’t have a pen or paper to write anything down (I did contemplate stealing some post its and a pen from the retreat organizers!) so I’m also glad it stuck around in my brain enough to write it.

I hadn’t thought about how answering those anons was like spoilers for the fic! It’s wild to think I have a fic where people care about spoilers. Thank you so much for being apart of bringing this world to life.

[papermachedragons]

you can tell me to buzz off if you like but it sounds like you could use taking a step back from fic ideas, or trying to get a handle on them at least. sometimes putting a lot of pressure on yourself to write and produce fantastic works can kill off creativity more than just not writing at all. if something sticks, then that's brilliant and you can give it a go. if it doesn't get finished because something else sticks instead, that's okay! half a fic at least means you've got something to come back to or pilfer from for other fics. equally, if nothing sticks and ideas continue to come in tidal waves that you can't break through, then let them wash over you. it's alright to take some time to reset, especially if it's stressing you out a lot. sending virtual hugs if you like them and hoping your sleep schedule gets less out of whack soon 💛

Hey <3 <3

Yeah, you pretty much hit everything right on the head.

I think this came about because I tried to take a step back from fic writing, but not a big enough step? Like I got top surgery in march and in the week leading up to that and the two months following post op, I very deliberately took a break from writing. Did not write at all. Barely even thought about it and forced myself to not even read anything I'd written previously. To take care of myself and my chronic illness and give myself the best chance at recovery without excarbating my chronic illness or aggravating my healing scars.

Now on month 3 of not writing, I'm in this hell of not being able to focus on the long fic I'm writing. Like I can't get my mind to focus at all on this baby. So I go, well, I could work on my other wips and maybe they could get me out of my writing slump and my brainfog unfocus hell. But I don't pick just one fic. I just sorta,,, muddle about all of them. Not that I'm coming up with new fic ideas, just bouncing between old wips all the time (and one, just 1, new fic idea for a new fandom that came unpromted) but then in the middle of that muddling about, my brain goes, "hey hey hey you want to write original stories too, right? Like you want to be a published author and write books and all that?? Have you worked on those original ideas lately? Well, shouldn't you be doing that, then? Hey hey hey what about taking a break from all that fanfiction and trying to work on these plots to these original stories? Wouldn't that be so fun???" And that's where this tsunami of fics and stories come from. It's just this massive wave of fics and original story ideas overwhelming me because I'm trying to work on all of them, and it just paralyses me, so I can't write at all

But yeah, you're definitely right. I'm definitely putting pressure on myself, too. I especially get really stuck on pressuring myself to write when two or three (or more) months pass where I'm unable to write/don't write anything. So you're right on the nose that I'm pressuring myself. Which also just excarbates the issue of tsunami fics and ideas without me just picking one to focus on

I also haven't read an actual book in months. Mainly because of aforementioned pressuring myself to write. It's like I'm pressuring myself to the point where I can't do anything else, because if I'm spending time reading books, then I'm not even trying to write and that's not allowed and im wasting time, and i can't do that, i have to write, i have to write, I can't just spend all my time reading or watching movies even though I need to take an actual break and my body needs to lay back and relax because my chronic illness is screaming at me today but I can't do that because I need to write

And it's so severe and all-encompassing that it makes me feel guilty for picking up an actual book, even though reading is a vital part of writing. So I think I'm gonna force myself to chill out with writing and read some books. I've been wanting to reread Perry Jackson the last while, so I think I'll read that series. It's nice and easy for me to read because of the writing style and I've read it before, which is exactly what I need when I'm in unfocus brainfoggy hell. And hey, this time I can even wear my camp half-blood t shirt because I chopped my tits off, it's a win win.

And thank you for the virtual hug! I'm sending the warmest of hugs right back to you! 💛🌻

[booksanstime]

Bigolas Dickolas and the Time War

The other day I was feeling rather out of it, so I decided to pick some media to immerse myself in. Some media to make me feel something sharp and intense, to get catharsis. I landed around reading a few books, all I will get to talking about in due time, but I surprisingly started with the book I didn’t initially plan on reading. This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone. I will start with giving a short review on the book that is spoiler free and then go more into detail on my actual feelings. Spoiler Free Review- Nothing. I really can’t say much. It made me cry, it made me look up quite a few things, and after I was done reading it I was blown away, but I truly feel no information is the best way to go in. For those who want some idea of what you’re getting yourself into, I will say to just read the synopsis on the back of the book, but not the reviews, and be prepared for a possibly challenging read(it can be verbose). The back of the book reads: “In the ashes of a dying world, Red finds a letter marked “Burn before reading”       So begins an unlikely correspondence between two rival agents in a war that stretched through the vast reaches of time and space.       Red belongs to the Agency, a post-singularity technotopia. Blue belongs to Garden, a single vast consciousness embedded in all organic matter. Their pasts are bloody and their futures mutually exclusive. They have nothing in common--save that they’re the best, and they’re alone.       Now what began as a battlefield boast grows into a dangerous game, one both Red and Blue are determined to win. Because winning’s what you do in war. Isn’t it?       A tour de force collaboration from two powerhouse writers that spans the whole time and space.” One other thing. I don’t want to say too much, but it is also a good read if ya want something remotely queer for pride month, and it’s only 198 pages long. Now, onto not caring about spoilers, ---warning!! spoilers ahead and some unfiltered thoughts--- This book fucking took me by the throat and made me look directly into it’s eyes on every fucking page. I swear, the moment I started reading I did not stop once until I had read it all. I had to take a moment to sip some water, perform some standard body maintenance, but outside of that, I didn’t put the book down until I was done. And then when I was done, I laid down for a moment, and then reread certain lines and paragraphs and phrases again. The next day I was still going back to it, so much so I decided to reread the first bit (while not emotionally prepared to reread the whole book yet) and it had me losing my mind and recommending it to everybody I know. This Is How You Lose the Time War fucking hit like a school bus on a college campus. It’s everything my friends and I joke that we need, would be a pain to actually live through, but I’m sure half of us would not complain to have. Reading this book was, in a way, exhausting. The journey the authors took us through, the tragedy, the love, the longing, it wore on me. It was incredibly engaging and profound, yes.. but it still was a trip, a roller-coaster of emotions, and I don’t do well with heights. It may take me many more days before I feel like I can read it again, but rest assured I will, because I am absolutely certain it is worth at least another read. Like a video game where each play around you unlock new things, new aspects of the story that can lead you to the true end you couldn’t get the first go around. But I guess it’s slightly different than that. This book is more so a Möbius strip, as the last letter from Blue reads. This book is about a war and a love that, “stretches through the vast reaches of time and space.” Everything happening from the beginning of the book is happening later in the book as well, but I digress, I should go into more specifics. This books is about two people on opposing sides of a war. Red and Blue, code-names (though we don’t learn their actual names). They have a fierce and intense rivalry, while having respect for one another at the same time. They both weave and manipulate the past to try to make their respective futures possible, to make their very existences possible. They may just be the grunts for their respective futuristic matriarchs, but they are the best in their field and constantly at each others throats, while never outright sabotaging one another. And while constantly communicating through an effort akin to growing strawberries for a loved one (a painstaking thing to grow), the two rivals painstakingly weave time to leave messages for one another. Taunting each other. Blue saying they’ll turn Red to their side, to Garden. Both enjoying the company at some point of simply each other’s messages in their memories, as both Garden and the Agency keep close tabs on them and they could not simply keep a message, a letter, around. And at some point, from the intellectual back and forth from two people on opposite sides of a war, they fall in love. Blue takes a heavy wound when Garden sends her to kill a younger version of Red, a wound she will carry in every form she takes. Red is taken aback and professes she no longer sees Blue as the enemy, that she wishes to talk to her more. Blue and Red weave messages through time, in bee stings and dragonflies. In seeds and teas and then.. Red confesses her love. Blue dies at the hands of Red and the Agency, and then Red tears through time and space to bring her back. To Be Continued... >>

[thesimperiuscurse]

08.04

It’s The Kingston Legacy’s sixth anniversary, so here’s a throwback post to celebrate! Last month I forced myself to reread the entire legacy, and while I stopped, clicked off the tab, and emitted a soundless scream of pure cringe numerous times (I wish I was kidding)—the past generations are actually not as terrible as I remember. I think enough time has passed for me to detach myself from the childish storytelling and look back in nostalgia. 

Thank you to my fellow Wordpress writers who have come along the journey, some for many years now, through every high and low. It’s astounding how much has changed in the legacy from when I was 15, and 21. Follow me down the (very) long memory lane, as I reminiscence about each story and my perspective on them now ❤

Generation 1 — Fern (2015)

To my shock, I found myself genuinely enjoying Fern’s story. I think this was because the first generation was purely me commentating on gameplay, and not trying to write a story (that’s when the cringe began). I was inspired by one of the original stories, Alice and Kev, to make a homeless sim and document her struggle for a better life: Fern, a snobby aspiring writer. Reading this, a huge wave of nostalgia hit me, and it reminded me of how wonderful Sims 3 gameplay is. Although I’m long past it now, there’s real heart and life in the design. I think it speaks about the rich personalities and quirks that I could write a whole life story off it. It was super fun making Fern camp out at Old Pier Beach, stealing from townie picnics and roasting apples on the fire, finding little ways to scrounge money, giving her a makeover in the salon, watching the townie dramas unfold around her. Although she faced homelessness two times and a shitty first husband (yeah, fuck off, Xander), Fern grew into a strong and independent yet sweet and gentle character, in love with the ocean like her great-granddaughter comes to be.  

I never actually addressed this, but she (and her love Christopher) passed away in the story between the end of Gen 3 and start of Gen 4. It just felt weird to make it a big deal because they never died in game—still ‘alive’ and well, scattered across different backup saves and the bin.  

Generation 2 — Briar (2015)

Briar’s story was strange, because it was half gameplay and half story, which meant that there were things that just did not... make... sense. She was quite an ‘unreliable’ character to follow because of her Insane trait. The plot revolved around her as a fresh detective, investigating supernatural phenomena in Sunset Valley. Her character arc was almost the opposite to her mother’s: a naive, optimistic, silly girl hardening through trauma into a cold and ruthless police chief. Ash’s death was the one moment I felt true sadness in this legacy, because he did really die. Imagine me actually getting emotional over my characters, lmao. Wild. 

Also, Max is OP. To this day he is one of the best male characters in my legacy, a healthy and supportive best friend (to husband) in stark contrast to the following generation. 

Fallen Angels — Cherry (2016-2019)

Yes. It’s this generation. Square the fuck up, Cherry. I will fight her any day. Old readers will know of my pure hatred for this story. It’s been about two years since it thankfully ended. My verdict now?

It’s not quite as horrifically shitty, Gabriel and Lilith being a lot nicer than I remembered (Gabriel’s only a bit of a dick at the start), but it still has glaring problems, such as the pacing and clumsy handling of sensitive topics. The story would have been far nicer if it focused less on Cherry and Luc’s relationship and their respective issues, more on the found family and her relationship with Gabriel (which was rushed due to me despising the story by that point). During the first chapters, I was cringing spectacularly at the combination of Luc’s initial jackass behaviour and Cherry’s whining. Toxic as FUCK. I had to skip 3.8 and 3.9 entirely. These two (because of my own shameful mistake) tainted the generation in my eyes, and even though all of the characters grew from their toxicity, I can’t really see past that guilt to the better parts of the story. 

Jade has been telling me for years that this story isn’t all bad, and upon forcing myself to reread, I can see what you mean. I’m sorry LOL. Something that pleasantly surprised me was the writing quality (just the prose, not the actual story mechanics... lmfao), and Raphael, who made me smile every time he appeared. Every single careless, sarcastic line of his was a banger. The pictures are something else I like, too. Many of them stand up to the best ones in En Pointe—the fiery, gritty, industrial tones of Bridgeport just hits different. The world was rich and immersive, which is missing at the moment in En Pointe because of me being too lazy to build a proper Los Angeles world, but Act III is set in Boroughsburg so I’m excited to get back into the city scenes. 17 year old me wasn’t mature enough to tackle dark themes, but at least the visuals for them were nice, I guess. The atmosphere of the story I really enjoy. It’s just the toxic characters and way-too-angsty moments that ruin the whole thing for me. 

En Pointe — Evangeline (2019-)

And here we are now! The early chapters are kinda painful to read because 1) Mako looked so ugly and 2) the dialogue was so clumsy and generic. I sighed in relief when Chapter 5 came around, because it was then both of those aspects really began to improve. Eva’s voice was simple, with her punchy remarks, much less romantic and descriptive than Cherry, so it was interesting to see her voice becoming more complex and layered as I more understood her character. Also, me visibly struggling with the natural lighting and only getting a handle on it 7 chapters later has me shaking my head. 

I’m already beginning to identify issues with the story, mostly with character arcs and pacing. It’s a strange combination of fast pacing (spanning half a year in 8 chapters) and Eva becoming surprisingly comfortable with Mako’s touch due to their unusual pas de deux circumstances. It’s curious how real life time actually played into the pacing of the story—because of the slow publishing schedule, less time has passed in the story as real life, so it’s almost as if the time jumps were made up by real life time, making the jumps feel not too strange. Reading consecutively, however, Evako’s relationship growth doesn’t feel slow burn... a little underdeveloped, in a way, despite their lengthy conversations. I think that’s because of Mako being such a reserved and mysterious character, and that I’ve unconsciously come to rely on Tumblr to give more depth to the characters/relationships. Luckily, pretty much everyone who comments on the story also follows me here, so this dual-platform storytelling is okay, I suppose. I want to post more of #Mishako since there just isn’t enough time to explore their bromance in the story!

At the moment I’m not happy with the story, but it’s fine. I’m learning. There’s more than half the story to go, which means plenty of time to reflect upon the issues and improve. I’m really looking forward to Eva and Mako’s character arcs in Act III. At the moment their relationship is based on their natural chemistry and respect for each other, and since they are yet to face trials their bond isn’t super deep, but Evako are still my favourite couple in the legacy thus far, and feel much more real than any character I’ve written before. It’s been very interesting for my aro ass (and being way more logical than emotional) to figure out a dynamic that is actually compelling to me, because most of the time when I look at romance I’m just like 😐🤨 I’m liking it so far but we shall see how everything unfolds, because I have barely any idea what’s going to happen beyond Act II, lmfao. 

That’s it for my incredibly long throwback! I hope it was at least nice for the OG readers, and interesting for anyone else who managed to battle through this essay, haha. This family has been an integral part of me growing up, as a person and writer and artist (what I’ve developed in visuals I apply to architecture), learning a great deal of awareness about real life through story research, which is pretty cool now that I think about it. I’m aiming to finish En Pointe by the end of 2022. I’m excited for what unexpected changes are to come!

[kenrik]

I’ve written a lot of GoUta fics,

Sharing all of them here would take forever. So, just sharing my favorites!

First and foremost, however, I want to say that I adore, absolutely adore (and find myself always re-reading!) onemoreword’s works. These fics are the pinnacle of everything I could want from GoUta. The world this author has created, the grasp they have of the characters -

onemoreword’s writing is simple and straightforward, yet so beautiful, so haunting. They’re the best for me, in a ship with so many awesome authors and stories already. UwU

PrettyKittyLuvsU also holds a special place in my heart! 

Their fics are just so pure and deep. Mine’s are really just surface, just to get me through my brainrot fics. 🤣 I’m trying to write stories with deeper insight into the characters in canon, but, it’s taking me forever to build a story. The rules set by the JJK world, their dynamics, the tone I want to achieve of their relationship, are all so tedious to factor in. Most of what I’ve written are AUs and fluff because I just put in the bickering and teasing and call it a day. xD

I’m trying with Still Blue, This Black Sky, but it’s a new fic. And I’ve just come up with a plot. I’m only updating once I have a draft of the entire story. Posting without one is a pain, I lost my way a lot with 01 and Cast Away. 

I also reread my fics! I write fanfics after all, so I can read my HCs. Hahahaha

So, if you happen to find my fics fun to read too, we’re in the same boat! xD

Ao3 says I’ve written 21 JJK stories. 🤣🤣

This shipper’s brainrot is too real, too potent. 🤣🤣 I can’t even with my self.  🤣🤣  

Here are my favorite stories to reread - 

1. Drinking Parties - Canon-Compliant, Funny

A series of oneshots following GoUta go from bar to bar. 

And now, there they were. At their drinking party. The drinking party where Gojo said everyone would be going to. It would be fun, he told her. Everyone would have a such a blast, he said.

Honestly, Utahime could only blame herself for being foolish enough to believe him.

This damn idiot. She thought with a glare as she slammed her mug of beer on the table.

"You're really mad." Gojo looks at her with a curiosity. "Why?"

Why? Utahime seethed. "Where the hell is everyone?!" She threw her glass at him. And his infinity just catapulted it away and made a shattering mess on the floor.

"That wasn't nice, Utahime." He shakes his head at her. "It's that time of the month, huh?"

Utahime flushes red the next second. And with an embarrassed cry, she reached out for Gojo's very own glass and flung it at him as well.

"You're paying!" She screamed at him in finality when she's gotten tired of his stupid infinity. And she drops back to her seat and yells for the waitress to serve them a round of beer.

"Drink!" She barks at him when he was just playing with his glass. "Drinking party, my ass." She grumbles to the rim of her mug. And she downed her drink in one go.

2. The Clearing - Series of AUs, Japanese Folklore AU, Samurai AU, Pirate AU

A series of AUs covering soulmates over the course of history.

(Pirate AU)

They were cruising in the high seas when Satoru was leaning on his back against a wooden pillar, idly sharpening his knife. He was whistling to himself when a crew member walks up to him with an anxiousness about him.

"Um, captain," He didn't know what to say; how to say it. "I think I found a stowaway."

Satoru turned to him with a dangerous twitch in his eye.

"What?" He spits with a venom.

And in the next instant, a woman in menswear was thrown before him at the deck.

He took it as a personal offense that anyone dared board his ship without his express approval. Let alone a woman. He spat at her gall. He would have her head, he thinks to himself in a growing spite.

"The sharks are going to be full today." He tells his crew coldly as he looked at the woman who didn't dare face him, whose angry gaze was directed to the wooden floorboards.

"Have any final words before you die?" He asks her to make peace with her inevitable demise.

And when she doesn't speak, Satoru just waves a lazy hand, signaling to his crew to just get it over with.

But before anyone could touch the woman, she speaks in a low voice, "I'll do anything."

Satoru turns to her with a confusion, with a raised brow.

"What?"

And she suddenly looks up at faces him with a fierce glare in her eyes.

"I'll do anything! So, let me stay on board!" She cries. And her hands clench against the wooden boards; the smell of the ocean consuming her; the adventure she's yearned for her whole life was so close she could taste it. "Let me stay!"

Satoru leans back, surprised.

Then, he starts to smile a sinister smile.

"Do you even know what you're saying?"

Utahime clenches her jaw.

"Do you have any idea where we're going?" He laughs at her dryly and crouches down at her; his face patronizing.

"You won't last a day with us."

"You'll get raped."

"You'll get killed."

"You might even just stub your toe and start crying for your mom." He laughs at how ridiculous she was.

Then, he pokes her cheek with the dull end of his knife.

"Don't be stupid."

I can’t even begin to say how much I love this Pirate AU. I love all the AUs in this story. I love everything I write honestly, even if it’s just plain crack. xD 

But, they’re just so cute in this AU. I love them so much. And I owe readers a sequel.... 🤣🤣

3. the most valuable relationship to a sorcerer is friendship - Canon-Compliant, Friends at a wedding, Have a serious conversation, about their life as sorcerers

Uta and Satoru find themselves attending the wedding of a mutual friend. 

He finds her in a bar alone, nursing a drink. And when her gaze drifts from her beverage to him, she almost spits out her drink.

"What are you doing here?!" She cried at him in dismay. And Gojo just chuckled as he approached her.

"You don't have to be so mad about it." He tells her with a small smile. "I'm on vacation."

"You take vacations?" She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Occasionally." Gojo grins at her. "Rarely." He adds. And Utahime frowns at him when he eventually says, "Mostly never."

"You here for the wedding?"

And he laughs again when Utahime just turns away with a deep sigh.

"I am." She sips her drink. And, she fights back the twitch in her eye when Gojo takes the empty seat next to her.

"Shall we go together, then?"

Utahime turns to frown at him.

"You think I came here alone?" She hisses at him in disbelief.

And Gojo just smiles at her. "Didn't you?" Then, he laughs when Utahime relents.

"Fine." She sighs. "I still can't accept that out of everyone I know, I run into you, you of all people, in Hawaii." She groaned to the heavens. And Gojo just chuckles. "In Hawaii, Gojo. Why?" She cried to the heavens for an answer. Why did they have to keep torturing her?

"Must have been something you did in a past life." Gojo offers with a laugh, resting his cheek on the palm of his hand.

Beside him, Utahime's face soured.

4. Sweet - Modern AU, Barista Utahime, Cafe Shop

Uta is worried about the health of one of her regulars. 

"I can't, in good conscience, serve you anymore bubble tea."

"You took an oath or something?" He smirks. "Not to over serve poor salarymen with a sweet tooth?"

Utahime raises a brow and bites back her laugh.

"So," The man leaned over the counter with his smile, looking down at the selection of drinks in the menu laid on the bar. "What would you recommend I get?"

"An americano." She simply tells him and slips cups for a previous order into the plastic melder to seal them.

"All right." The patron smiles, too wide, and too familiar for Utahime's liking.

What was wrong with this guy, she couldn't help but frown in discomfort.

"But, add three tablespoons of honey." The man adds, and laughs at the look of disbelief on Utahime's face. "What? Honey's not sugar."

"It is..." Utahime couldn't believe this guy. "Whatever." She sighs and prepares his order. But, instead of the three spoonfulls of honey, she put a single teaspoon.

And when he drinks it in front of her, she laughs out loud at the disgusted, sour look on his face. And he demanded she give him five packets of sugar.

5. Immature - Canon-Compliant, Gojo “teasing” Utahime, First Meeting, Childhood GoUta

Uta finally meets the kid with the Six Eyes. 

When the family before them leaves, when they're presented as the Iori house, Utahime is fuming red. But she bites her tongue and keeps her mouth shut in respect for her parents, for her relatives around her.

And when she sees how the six year old looked at her condescendingly, slouched forward on his seat, looking at her with his calculating eyes, seemingly appraising her; she starts to shake in a growing rage.

Then, he smirks. The six year old smirks at her.

And something inside her snaps when he tells her, when he chuckles and tells her,

"Did you know?" He smirks at her with a chuckle in his lips. "Did you know you're so weak?"

Red with rage, before her mother could stop her again, Utahime cries out and angrily grabs the empty juice box in front of her; and she throws it at the six year old; hitting him square on the face.

And he flushes. In an instant, he flushes red. A very, very angry, humiliated red.

"Utahime?!" Her mother cried out in dismay.

And Utahime had to be dragged out before she could get her claws at the six year old and set him straight.

6. Red, Blue, and The Purple Moon - Canon-compliant, Post-Shibuya Incident Arc, GoUta living together, Powerless Gojo

GoUta play house.

"Wow," She mouthed, not noticing how Gojo's face paled. "I actually got to hit you for once." She unconsciously ruffled the hair on the top of his head, making the strongest sorcerer twitch in annoyance.

"I can actually hit you, now." She suddenly gripped his head with some force. And Gojo could only look in horror at the murderous glint in her eyes.

"Utahime..." He tries to laugh it off, the growing tension in the air. And he tries to take Utahime's hands in his, tries to pull her hands off him, when Utahime suddenly looks down at him with a demented glare on her face and started chuckling.

"Gojo," She smiles at him sinisterly. "Do you remember," Her hands started to trail down from his hair, from his face to his neck. "Do you remember how you've been calling me weak since we've known each other?"

Gojo tries to smile back, tries to laugh with her; "Of course," He forces a chuckle. "We have our fun, Utahime!"

"Fun?!" Gojo sees the murderous glint flash in her eyes too late. And the next thing he knew, Utahime started choking him and shaking him like there was no tomorrow.

This is my first fic. I’ve had to rewrite this a lot, since I’m learning so much more about their world and the characters. Still, I really love this. I love the fact that Gojo is powerless. HAHAHA. I will definitely find myself editing this fic again. But I love it already as is. 

While I love No Love and 01, and all the other fics, I do not like angst. Just thinking about how it’ll hurt later on is just so painful. I don’t know what’s up with people and pain, but those who’ve read my stories seem to prefer angst. The heck. 🤣 Isn’t JJK canon enough pain for you guys? 🤣🤣

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

Today I’ll try to cure myself rereading some of your ff, because I’m really sad, I feel a little like when they killed Arthur on Christmas’s Eve. I can’t think about Eddie “the 118 is the family we chose” Diaz leaving that family

I'm so sorry that you're sad, nonny, and I'm glad that my fanfic can help. But I hope that my following words will reassure you - if they don't and you're still upset, may I kindly suggest taking a break from the show? You shouldn't keep investing in something that makes you that sad.

Eddie isn't leaving the show - I'm now 100% sure that was why Ryan posted on Instagram about "stage four Eddie" despite rarely posting about the show. It was to preemptively reassure us that Eddie isn't going anywhere. But he is leaving the 118 - temporarily.

Eddie and Buck's arcs this season have reminded me very strongly of four things.

1. Maddie. Maddie went through a terrible terrible trauma. In response to that trauma, she tried to quit her job at dispatch, and she stalked a woman who also had an abusive husband in a misguided attempt to save that woman. Eddie compares himself sub-textually to Maddie in the balcony season earlier this season (and I think Buck partially realized that in the last moment of this Christmas episode), and all of Eddie's behavior has deeply paralleled Maddie in 3B. So he's not leaving the 118 forever. He just needs to take a break - and also realize how badly he's dealing with his trauma.

Now for the Buddie stuff, since I suspect this is also a concern of yours, and many others, and I think it ties into why Eddie is leaving.

2. Beckett from Castle. In the television show Castle, season three finale, Beckett is shot. We didn't find out until season four if she survived (the worst summer of my tender youth). Season four Beckett spent handling her trauma VERY poorly. Like Eddie, Beckett was a character who focused on what she could control and always assumed she knew best and would lone wolf it and hold her feelings inside, no matter how much damage it did to her. This led her and Castle, her partner, to a breaking point, where they argued and Castle pointed out how he felt shut out by her.

The conclusion to all this? Beckett admitting she was in love with him and kissing him in the season four finale.

3. Booth and Brennan from Bones. In season six, Booth, feeling he cannot have Brennan, dates another woman. This woman reminds me of Taylor in many ways, although a much better done version of Taylor. She's even a reporter, for crying out loud (a war correspondent and investigative journalist but STILL)! Buck's arc this season SCREAMS Booth to me - trying to move on with someone else and forcing pieces to fit when he knows they aren't actually right for each other. Brennan, after much soul-searching, confesses her love to Booth while he is still with this other woman, leading to a lot of pain for both of them - Booth is clearly in agony, knowing he does care for his current girlfriend and refusing to just drop her and hurt her, but also knowing that the woman he truly loves wants him back. Brennan is in agony, repeating through tears, "I'm too late. I know I'm too late."

The conclusion to all this? Booth and his girlfriend break up two-three episodes later and he gets with Brennan.

4. Mulder/Scully and Josh/Donna. So, for those of you who never watched these older shows, these are the slowburn couples from The X Files and The West Wing respectively. The reason I'm bringing them up is that the writers did not intend for them to be couples. You will notice with Castle I said season four finale was when they got together, right? That's four seasons of slowburn from writers who intended the couple to get together from the beginning. Buck and Eddie haven't even hit their four seasons together mark yet, and they were not intended to be a couple.

We can yell about hints all we want, but I'm gonna be honest here - quit the fangirling. Tim and Co did not plan Buddie from day one. Hell they barely knew what to do with Eddie in season two because their original plan for him to be Maddie's love interest was scrapped. It's part of why Eddie in Under Pressure, his first episode, has a very different attitude from Eddie in later episodes. They're still figuring out his character.

What happened was the writers saw the feedback in season two - hence the Instagram and elf shout outs - and decided to test the waters in season three. Notice how the shout-outs stop in that season but the narrative itself becomes more Buddie-focused and binds them together.

We had to wait seven seasons (the entirety of TWW's run) for Josh and Donna to get together. Mulder and Scully didn't kiss until season seven and even then weren't an official couple until season nine. And recall - COVID happened! A PANDEMIC HAPPENED. That fucked up a LOT of stuff.

We need to be patient with writers when they are course-correcting. I don't think they decided to go full-throttle on Buddie until the end of season three, and then the pandemic hit, so that threw things off. This is a slowburn and that means there will be bumps in the road!

All this to say - I understand how emotional we can get with TV shows. Oh, the tears I have shed! The weeping I have done! THE BITTERNESS I HOLD IN MY HEART NOT THAT I'M THINKING ABOUT TIMELESS OR ANYTHING--

*cough*

Sorry, ha ha, old scars and all that.

Anyway, my point is that I understand your frustration and sadness. But I hope the examples above, both in the 911 show itself and in other shows (two of which were on FOX as well), will reassure you that what is happening is ultimately to help Eddie address his trauma and bring him and Buck together as better people ready to be their best with one another.