#i haven't posted anything on youtube or deviantart

[ms-demeanor]

any thoughts on the new post that staff went scorched earth on which is now making the rounds abt tumblr live? it basically screenshots all the tos and claims if you've ever opened the app (or in some rbs, unsnoozed live) tumblr has gotten your data. on the one hand i feel like this is fearmongering, but on the other its true that MOST sites have your data as is so its pretty standard. you seem pretty knowledgeable abt data gathering so i was wondering abt your take

This is going to be pretty unkind but watching tumblr users interact with staff and live is a great primer on how conspiracy theories happen.

Nobody on this fucking website knows how to read a ToS, nobody on this website knows how anything fucking works (sorry, this is not a dig at you but how would tumblr "get" your data from you clicking or unclicking live; the only data that tumblr has on you is the data that you have put on tumblr what data do people think that clicking the "new" button is scooping up that is anything beyond interactions or posts or IP addresses which are the things that tumblr already has information about like you do not introduce new information into the tumblr ecosystem by clicking a button you haven't installed anything you haven't changed permissions on your browser if everyone is so goddamned scared about live stealing their data i strongly recommend they stop using anything but public internet through an anonymizer and making sure location data is shut off on all of their devices and anyone who is flipping their shit about the type of data that live is collecting but who is using chrome on any device needs to chill the fuck out about live and flip the fuck out about google)

this is like that post about twitter's content policy that circulated the other day or that post about deviantart's content policy that circulated ten fucking years ago nobody knows how to read legal documents and nobody knows how to read technical documentation and this comes together into unholy matrimony on the no reading comprehension at all moral panic website

live never violated the GDPR it was just rolled out in the US first but the entire userbase decided that because it hadn't been rolled out simultaneously in the EU and the US that it was SO UNSPEAKABLY PRIVACY VIOLATEY THAT THE EU HAD BANNED IT FOR ITS CRIMES with, like, nothing whatsoever backing that up because, again, even at its most intrusive Live collects about as much data as Twitter or Yelp, both of which are *capable* of meeting GDPR standards with that level of data collection (even if musk sometimes makes decisions that violate GDPR).

Live is significantly less intrusive than any facebook product, than Amazon, and than any Google product. If you use youtube logged in, don't worry about live, the horse is out of the barn and tumblr is the least of your worries *regardless* of live. If you regularly use Google as a search engine please god learn how to evaluate and compare risks across platforms because Live is like a coughing baby compared to about a dozen things that most highly online people interact with every single day.

If you don't want to use live don't use live. Clicking the button doesn't magically transfer your secret FBI file to tumblr and even agreeing to the ToS doesn't share anything that tumblr doesn't already have if you don't continue to interact - if you don't interact with live after agreeing to the ToS it's not collecting any data except your non-interaction.

For everyone who is losing it over Live just turn off your goddamned location on your fucking cellphone and turn off your location on your goddamned computers and that's it, you're good, you're fine, relax. If your response to "turn off your location" is "but I need it for _____" then don't worry about Live, whatever "_____" is was already collecting and selling your data.

Do you use an activity tracker? Congrats, you have much, much bigger privacy issues to worry about than tumblr live.

Okay but also I yelled about that post and the very many ways in which it was incorrect in January.

And I happened to take an archive of the page at that time because I'm a paranoid motherfucker.

And if you want my guess as to why staff went "scorched earth" on that post it's probably because if you scroll down to the bottom of the page on the archive, OP calls on everyone looking at the post to send a kind fuck you to the CEO then tagged his tumblr.

If you look at the other posts that went scorched earth in relation to tumblr staff they were also posts that very pointedly directed a lot of ire at a single staff member.

I don't think that any individual tumblr staff members are above criticism and I don't think that staff as a whole is above criticism but part of learning to read a ToS is understanding that someone can be shitty and vague and use TERF talking points and skirt the line and be technically okay under the ToS while someone can have a legitimate gripe about another user being horrible and manage to violate the ToS by accidentally spinning up a harassment campaign or suicide baiting someone.

Shitty people like nazis and terfs thrive on being edge cases. They are very good at finding a boundary and standing juuuuuuuuust on this side of it and going "la la la I'm not violating the ToS, you can't stop me!" and that blows and it leads to a lot of people encountering a lot of shitty stuff on a lot of websites but personally I'm pretty glad that there's a lot of gray area because when you cut out gray area that's when you see things like It's Going Down getting banned as extremist content alongside white supremacists. Please continue to report nazis and terfs, and when possible go deep into their pages to report because a pattern of behavior is more likely to get recognized as hate speech than a single post that gets reported a hundred times. Please block as many people who it's harmful for you to interact with as possible because it's clear that staff is not going to do the kind of work protecting users that users would like staff to do.

However I just can't get angry on behalf of a blogger who got nuked for saying "Hey everyone who hates this feature that we all hate please go tell the CEO to fuck himself at this URL specifically" - that is an extremely clear violation of the ToS because it is absolutely targeted harassment.

So now tumblr-the-userbase is going off on its merry conspiracy way skipping through fields and lacking reading comprehension and saying "users are getting banned for reporting the crimes of tumblr live and its gdpr violations" and ignoring the fact that the post was nuked because the last line was saying "hey everyone, let's all individually tell the CEO to fuck off in messages sent directly to him that are certainly not going to include any threats, exaggerations, gore, etc. etc. etc."

If I were to make a post that had 50k notes and the last line was "and while you're at it, please send tumblr-user-ms-demeanor a personalized message telling them why they're a terrible person so they know what we think of them" it would absolutely be reasonable to say that was harassing that user. And that post did it with the CEO. Who is not above criticism (and I have my criticisms! I don't think he really gets tumblr and that's a problem!), but jesus fucking christ don't tag the goddamned CEO or any other staff member in a call to action asking users to send them messages saying "fuck off" this is literally the stupidest thing I've ever seen a tumblr conspiracy theory coalesce around.

Anyway thank you for giving me a place to vent i've been getting more and more pissed about this for three days. Everyone feel free to kindly tell tumblr user ms demeanor to fuck off.

[ahhjaydraws]

✨ I CAN NOW FINALLY SHARE THIS! ✨

As mentioned before, I am part of this project filled with amazing artists and writers and I now get to share my Wintery junk (get it? lmao) piece here on my socials, perfect time to do so for the Christmas season! This was so fun to make and it was so worth it!

🎄🎁❄🎀🎅⛄

Btw, this piece of mine, as well as the entire fanzine, started before Thanks to Them was even announced. So anything that's supposed to be canon like Hunter's new hairstyle and additional scars aren't included since those events haven't transpired yet during the making of this zine ajsfjksf

Big thanks to @fourseasonszine for the opportunity to join this amazing project and to the contributors for making this fanzine a reality!

Aside from the fanzine, you also get some merch and a Huntlow 2023 calendar! Download them for FREE at: https://huntlowzine.itch.io/four-seasons

Happy Holidays everyone! 💖

💛💚🐦🐝🥞🍀

— — — — —

Likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated! If you liked this post, go check out more here on Tumblr and on my other social media accounts:

Campsite | Instagram | YouTube | Twitter | DeviantArt

[vivziepoparchives]

Just as a note for anyone trying to send me things to add to the archive!

I can confidently say I already have everything that can still be found publicly on:

the spindlehorse youtube

the old zoophobia youtube

viv's current twitter

vivzmind/taco of darkness/spam deviantarts

the zoophobia wiki

viv's ask.fm

the vivziepop tumblr

viv's portfolio tumblr

viv's newgrounds

any merch found on this spreadsheet

Things I'd love help with:

Anything deleted from any of the above accounts that can't be found on the waybackmachine

anything from her old live journal (i've only found a few fanarts there)

anything from one of her myriad of other tumblrs that are now locked

anything from the old asktycoxangel tumblr (I have a smattering but it's very little)

old sketchbook videos ,particularly one from 2011 (I have part two but not part one)

viv's nabyn account which I've been unable to find but know existed

anything she might have posted to her vivzmind or vivziezp twitter though she may never have posted art there for all I know

faustisse streams. I have one titled inking the alastor comic, one titled freelance work, and one titled fashion stream: charlie comic

other early streams by her or those working on her projects

basically things fans may have saved back in the day that didn't get recorded by the wayback machine before they were deleted.

I don't mind being sent things I already have cause I'd rather take a look than miss something I don't have yet, so don't be afraid to send anything. But f it's still up on her youtube or tumblr, I definitely have it. I just haven't posted it yet as I'm trying to post things in a way that provides variety.

No offense to anyone who has sent me the basic stuff! I appreciate anyone trying to help, but I thought I would save some people some time by stating what I definitely do have!

(I have a list of about 55 different old accounts of Viv's that I search on the waybackmachine. I don't think that's a complete list by a long shot, but I promise I have the very basic stuff still publicly available!)

[wascallywabbit1938]

This is my pinned post! PLEASE read through it so you know what you're getting yourself into LuL

{{ BASIC STUFF }}

- I'm an artist! All of my mangy little doodles are tagged with '#bugsyboy1938 art' so if you're interested check it out every now and then!

- I also have OC's! Posts that feature them are tagged with '#fatass n jackass', check 'em out too!

- I like to swear a lot to drive my points further or to be funnier, so if you're sensitive to strong language i suggest you think about if you really wanna follow me

- I'm a minor, so 18+ accounts aren't wanted here (wait another two years, bucko LuL)

- I do not discriminate! Everyone's welcome here (except of course the laundry list of "ists" and "phobes")! Proshippers, and l*licons can go choke on a chicken bone for all i care just don't interact with me

- I may go through your whole profile and like most of your posts if i like the stuff you post, it's all pure impulse LuL

- I have slight depression and anxiety so please be patient with me! It will do me a very good :)

- I use hyperbole and like to exaggerate things a lot so don't take the things i say too seriously (unless i go out of my way to tell you that i'm being serious, of course)

- PLEASE avoid being vague around me! Just say what you wanna say, t'ain't that hard to be precise!

- I am from (and still live in) Serbia and our time-zone is indeed screwy, so if you're from somewhere that isn't Europe and you're wondering why i haven't responded to one of your DMs that's because i'm probably tucked in bed and blowing snot bubbles

{{ T'INGS I LIKE }}

(What I'll Probably Talk About Here The Most)

- Ed, Edd n' Eddy (mostly about the Kanker Sisters)

- SpongeBob SquarePants (there is not a single season i outright dislike)

- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (mostly the 2003 4Kids show)

- The Pink Panther (mostly the original DePatie-Freleng shorts)

- Looney Tunes, Tom & Jerry and sometimes other 1940's/50's cartoon shorts

- Oggy & The Cockroaches

- Ren & Stimpy, Beavis & Butt-Head and sometimes other cartoons from the 1990's

- Garfield comics (and anything relating to the Garfield franchise, really LuL)

- SuperMarioLogan (yes the YouTuber, sorry LuL :þ)

- Platform fighters such as Nickelodeon All-Star Brawl 2, Rivals of Aether, Super Smash Flash 2, and of course, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Smash-Up

- And last but not least, Boogerman: A Pick and Flick Adventure. Truly a classic :)

{{ CHARACTER KIN-LIST }}

(These Characters Mean A Lot To Me)

- Lee, May Kanker (Ed, Edd n' Eddy)

- SpongeBob SquarePants, Mr. Eugene Krabs (SpongeBob SquarePants)

- Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael, and Michelangelo Splinterson (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003))

- Oggy, Jack (Oggy and the Cockroaches)

- Nina Cortex (Crash Bandicoot)

{{ WHERE ELSE TO FIND ME }}

- Discord: bugsbunny1938

- Twitter: @Wabbit_Guy

- Instagram: @wacky_wabbit_man

- DeviantArt: BugsyBoy1938

Hope y'all have a swell time hearing me ramble on about dumb shite!

[viridiave]

A little love post to HORROR JRPGs

Content Warning:

So I'm gonna be talking a lot about some pre-Undertale era RPG Maker Horror games, and this post is gonna contain both spoilers and the discussion of the following:

Blood and Gore

Psychological horror

Child abuse

Sexual assault

Suicide

Violence

Fictional minors being put into very messed up situations, because that's just the kinds of games these are

Other upsetting themes

Hetalia (because I can imagine that all of us have very complex feelings about this fucking franchise. It existing feels like it needs a warning)

This post is a nostalgia trip and exists purely because uh. I have literally no one else to talk to about these games, and please just click away if any of the above makes you uncomfortable in any way. Some of this stuff can't exactly be handwaved as just being products of their time.

I'll draw smthn real quick later just to make up for it I promise

I'm like days late to Halloween but I just wanted to write this after getting a bout of nostalgia lmao

I absolutely fucking love Horror JRPGs - the freeware ones, even though I haven't touched one in a LONG time. I'm talking about the pre-Undertale era freeware games by the way, and in the first place I don't think I can consider Undertale a horror game but that's a topic for another day. OneShot also doesn't count aksjak OneShot gives me existential dread and a nonzero amount of guilt sure, but never terror

But let's dial that back a bit.

To begin with. 'Vir, you're a fucking coward, you run upstairs when you see that someone on TV has a gun. You can't stand watching horror movies. How the FUCK did this happen'

Weirdly, you can thank Hetalia for that. Specifically, the freeware Hetalia fangames that used to circulate on DeviantArt - that shit led me down this rabbit hole. And I guess it made sense, most Hetalia fangames are a coin toss between a horror game and a fantasy JRPG with countries getting isekai'd. I also played the fuck out of those.

For a bit of background, I love video games, but neither me nor my family ever really had that much spending power to buy game consoles, so my selection was pretty limited. Before I turned 18, I remember that we owned a GameBoy, a GameBoy Advance, a PSP, and one of those Fun-Sized Nintendo consoles with built-in games. We never bought cartridges either. I got my first DS from my dad on my birthday when I turned 18, and that's all the consoles that my family has ever owned. Still kinda jealous of my friends who have Switches, but eh - one day.

I just played a lot of Harvest Moon growing up, that's been my object of interest in my elementary days. The most of a horror game that I've been exposed to was watching my friends play Five Nights At Freddy's back in 5th grade.

Then high school happened, and I got new friends and shit - and was introduced to both more conventional horror games and Hetalia. Which is. A really weird combination when I think about it now, but everyone who was alive and kicking around in the early 2010's would know what HetaOni is, and you can see how that slope led to me playing freeware horror games. I'll always be grateful to these games, seeing as I never had easy access to mainstream experiences growing up.

I think I played HetaOni exactly once, on my first laptop. I played most Hetalia fangames exactly once, but they all just stayed on my old hard drive. None of them really had anything interesting going on gameplay-wise, I mean it's RPGMaker and these were people who just really wanted to make Hetalia fangames, but I remember some of them just sticking with me. I'd play them while I was away on trips to my grandmother's house, then watch let's plays on YouTube when I wasn't otherwise occupied with schoolwork. Really when I say Let's Plays I only mean KyoKoon64's - and that's how I was actually introduced to horror JRPGs.

CLOÉ'S REQUIEM

There's been a couple of times where they played some of the more recognizable horror JRPGs on their channel, but the first one I REALLY saw a playthrough on was one called Cloé's Requiem. I don't know what exactly it was about this specific game that stuck with me, and at the time I didn't know that this had like. More warnings than you would usually find on a horror JRPG. Calling it now, please look up said warnings before you try ANYTHING with this game - I can't promise quality and nuance, but I can promise great moments. Those moments stuck with me to this day, SOMEHOW, even after encountering games with better story and gameplay experiences… it's about a cursed 12 year-old boy trying to free a cursed 13 year-old girl, never getting a shot at the normal life he wanted and playing the violin because he can't do much else.

I think this game changed my life. Not in like, any grand manner mind you - but I feel like it's the game that best represented this time of my life as a weird high school outsider who obsesses over games that nobody's ever heard about. I was introduced to a lot of things through this game, it's just this whole volley of firsts that I wouldn't trade for anything else. Baby's first horror game, first jumpscare I ever consented to, first taste of games containing disturbing themes of sexual assault and gore, first trips to Pixiv and NicoNicoDouga - just all the fucking firsts. I wouldn't call it a great game, but it IS important to me.

When I think about it now, it's a game about curses. Michel D'Alembert is a talented violinist at 12, and his alcoholic father milks the shit out of this talent because they're not exactly what you would call well-off. His twin brother Pierre is a pianist, is nowhere near as talented as his brother, and hides his misery over this situation under a big-little brother façade. Cloé Ardennes is a pianist too, she's wealthy, talented, and still plays with her stuffed animals. She is cursed with an insane father who rapes her, and a mother who hates her. Charlotte is a young maid with nothing and tries her best, only to be killed because she happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Unsurprisingly things fall apart for everybody very quickly.

Pierre's frustrations with his spoiled, lazy brother boiled over, and he curses Michel out in a heated moment. This drives Michel to murder their Charlotte by accident, and she becomes his curse - he runs out of the house, kills cats, and finds himself in the dilapidated mansion that Cloé inhabits. Cloé by this point is already dead, and so is her dad, her parents, and the maids. Cloé's father may be her curse but she is the curse of this mansion, and it transforms into something hostile until Michel comes along and saves her from the shadow of her father. Michel plays her a requiem, and resolves to go home to confront his crimes - and back to Pierre, who regrets everything he's done. Watching the sun rise with a disappearing Cloé in the True Ending will likely be the last peaceful moment he will ever have in his life.

That's like. Not everything that happens in this game, but this post is already so goddamn long and I still have a lot of other stuff I want to talk about. But the gist of it to me nowadays is that these children are cursed with loveless lives and the whims of the adults that have power over them. In the end, their lives are all ruined. Cloé and Charlotte are dead, and we have no idea what becomes of Michel and Pierre when word gets out that Michel killed a maid and assaulted several others in the house in a fit of emotional instability. In every other ending, Michel is killed and Cloé remains an evil spirit, so really this is the best that anyone ever gets out of this experience.

I remember watching a playthrough of Con Amore on YouTube, but I understood none of it because it was in Japanese, and the game itself was untranslated at the time. It follows the cats Noir and Blanc and basically serves as an addendum to the base game - honestly it made me feel sorry for Charlotte, who was nowhere near as psychotic as Michel thought she was. There's also light novels, but international shipping is expensive and I don't know Japanese so. I'll just never figure out what happens to everyone after the game ends I guess

One of these days, I'll buy the remake on Steam - which exists, and I can't say I recommend it if everything I just listed bothers you in any way. But I can't shake the attachment I feel towards this game no matter how many years it's been, nor how uncomfortable its themes are, so you know - maybe one day. I'll go back to it.

IB

So - following that, I got pretty curious about the other games in this genre of freeware horror. Ib is the one that everyone knows the best, both Markiplier and Pewdiepie played it so you KNOW it gets press, but even in Japan this game was a hell of a hit. To me, it's a simple game that I can finish in an hour, but man what an hour it can be.

If you were to play this game right now after seeing how much press it gets (which I think you should, it's on the Switch now! Go get it!), you MIGHT be a little disappointed. It's nowhere near as gory or disturbing as Cloe's Requiem for one and you know - a bunch of blood and guts and ghosts on the walls does not a good horror game make, but make your choices accordingly. Nah - instead this game's staying power lies in its atmosphere. Like how many games can you say take place inside of an art gallery where most of the pieces try to fucking murder you? I mean there's probably a lot, but something about Ib's almost ambient sense of dread and exploration just kind of sticks in people's brains. Everything's a little scarier when the shapes are so close to being discernable but aren't, and I guess that's the appeal and horror behind Guertena's gallery.

Ib herself is a mute protagonist, pretty typical, but she's also NINE, and the game will let you know that no matter how unfazed she gets or how precocious she can be, she is a child all the same - and children break very easily. I personally love how the game barely has to say anything about how shaken she actually is about her situation, because it will show you how - she has nightmares that you can't escape, she sees herself getting hanged, Garry will need to shake her out of her shock when she sees a picture of her parents in the gallery that should not exist. She loses all of her will to live when she loses Garry to insanity. And speaking of Garry…

There's one standout room in this game and it's the Doll Room. 10/10 would NOT recommend it to anyone who suffers from anxiety because WOW I did not think the RPG Maker 2000 engine could ever have been capable of that. Nobody blames Garry if this room fucks him up. I mean come on the dude has to literally rip open the stomachs of dolls to find a paint ball. Those sound effects make it sound like the dolls are made of skin and flesh and all the while the giant fucking doll is creeping out of the goddamn painting while some of the most anxiety-inducing background noise is playing -

Yeah no I don't know why I ever said you'd be disappointed by this game. Or maybe you still would, this is a low-res game made in 2012. But my god does it TRY to scare you in the best ways it can.

One of the best moments in this game I think is the one where Mary and Ib are alone together, and the conversation gets increasingly unhinged with Mary asking Ib questions non-stop with no background noise other than their steps. At this point, they're separated from Garry, and they're trying to find a way back to each other. Garry meanwhile is slowly piecing together the truth about Mary and how dangerous it is for Ib to remain alone with her, all the while still trying to figure out how to get back to both of them.

The section after that is in the Sketchbook which honestly? The vibes of this place are impeccable. Somehow it's fitting that one of the tensest areas in a game about a fine arts gallery is the place made entirely out of childlike scribbles.

Overall, I'd say the experience is well worth an hour or two - I'd recommend it happily over Cloé's Requiem, if only so you can have a taste of what Horror JRPGs were like before Omori came along. Yes I know that Omori isn't Japanese but it's very much in the same vein as these games.

OTHER GAMES

Those were the safe two that planted my feet firmly into the Horror JRPG fandom, but there's a lot of other titles out there, so let's go - lightning round!

Ao Oni is the ubiquitous one, like chances are you've at least HEARD of it in passing at some point in your life. Like this shit made it to the big screen in Japan, that's how much of a deal it was. I've never played the original myself, but it's partly because its formula of stuck in a mansion with a horror that chases you around is present in pretty much every Horror JRPG after its release in 2007. If you want some classic fun with the big blue demon though then you can't go wrong with the freeware version.

Mad Father and The Witch's House are part of what I like to call the Big 3 of JRPGs starring preteen girls experiencing the Horrors™, mostly because back in the mid-2010's I couldn't go three posts without seeing them all together. Mad Father is the only other one of said Big 3 that I've touched, because I was too coward to touch The Witch's House and Ellen's whole deal remains a mystery to me to this day. I think Mad Father got a remake a couple of years ago, so you can check that out if you want, but keep in mind that these two games in particular might not stoke the same kind of magical staying power that Ib somehow retained years after its release, and I know those two rely on jumpscares a lot more than Ib does.

I'll eat my fedora right here by the way, because one of my cardinal sins of being a Horror JRPG fan is that I've never played Yume Nikki. As far as these freeware games go, this is probably one of the more avant-garde ones - it's artsy, atmospheric, and a game best experienced by getting lost in the strange environments it provides. Out of every game on this post, this is the one I'd describe as the most Earthbound-esque, with its horror lying mostly in the surrealist ambience of just… wandering around in Madotsuki's mind. The end is just as quiet as the beginning, but is no less chilling to watch happen. Then you fuck around a little bit on Youtube and you find out what's actually going on, and uh - yeah that checks out, cosmic horror sounds par for the course at this point.

Yume Nikki and OFF are two of the games I think of when I hear about Horror JRPGs being talked about alongside Undertale - and nope, I haven't played OFF either. That's my other Horror JRPG sin. I was a picky teenager, but I've grown now and wow I need to find a time to play these games in peace. OFF actually isn't even Japanese, it was developed by Mortis Ghost and released in French back in 2008, making both pretty old and already pretty weird in the library. The reason I bring up OFF is because it's one of the older examples I know of that also incorporate Earthbound's precision 4th-wall breaks, and that it's a game about judgment and interrogates the player (more you than the Batter you play as, serving more as a vehicle that the game uses to ask questions through) about the choices they make in the game. OneShot is probably the one game in this genre of indie RPG that I know so far that employs this metaphysical idea of the player existing in the game in any kind of charitable fashion (aside from again, Earthbound and to some extent Mother 3), so between it, OFF, and Undertale they're what I'd refer to as the Interface Screw-RPG Trio.

Some other titles that I like are between the same devs, even some that I haven't really played to completion. Cloé's Requiem for example was made by Buriki Clock, and they've made other titles like Fantasy Maiden's Off Hideout and Trauma Traum - the latter I can't play because it doesn't have an English translation rip. Miwashiba is another dev which I think people who have a taste for light lolita goth-pastel colors would like, because my god the character designs in both Alice Mare and LiEat are peak. Don't even get me started on the fashion of 1BitHeart because everything in that game has such an impeccable aesthetic. I think I saw something at one point about 1BitHeart that like. Might count as a shared joke between Xenoblade fans, but I'd be hard-pressed to give context because again… packed schedule, who dis?

Just to talk about Alice Mare a little more, I've actually played this one - it sports a heavily storybook-inspired cast with some unique tastes on the tales. Most of my actual experiences with Alice Mare were from the English Light Novel, which I do still have! I really recommend it to people who have a couple of hours to spare on some light, relatively bloodless horror. Most of these games have Light Novels, come to think of it - hell Ib even has whole audio dramas, one of which was fanmade in English, and from what I remember of it the voice acting for Mary was PEAK.

One last dev I want to talk about is Segawa. I've saved them for last because their brand of horror is reserved mainly for one game, but their other games Farethere City and Tower of Hanoi are no slouches either. I don't know much about Tower of Hanoi (or if it even has an English translation right now), but Farethere City is a pretty cute experience as far as pseudo-horror games go from what I've heard, which is probably good for us because their other standout game is anything but cute.

END ROLL

Ah, End Roll. The last of the Horror JRPGs I've played before school kicked me even harder in the shins and I had barely any time for it. Out of all the games I mentioned on this list, this is the one with the most staying power in my brain - and also the one that influenced me the most.

So, I don't talk a lot about my original works. Nobody asks, so I don't overshare. But some of the prevalent overarching themes of my personal mythos are those of guilt, self-love, and the burdens of love. All of these themes were lifted directly from End Roll - which is to say, End Roll actually only deals in guilt, my brain just ran buckwild with trying to wrap itself around the logistics behind InfoRuss. One of my main protagonists, Rosso, is a dead-ringer expy of Russell - the same goes for Blanco with the Informant. One of the only ways I can describe Rosso and Blanco's relationship is 'selfcest as a metaphor for the painful coexistence of self-love and self-loathing', and how this relationship reached this point was largely thanks to the Informant and his role in Russell's dream.

I don't really know why I've come to associate the idea of self-love with guilt, because that's like. Not what the game is trying to do. The game's express purpose is to tell you the story of a boy who comes to love his victims and self-destructs under the crushing guilt that he carries from killing them. By some weird hand, I've fixated on the Informant and his determination in seeing that mission of the game through - AND his secret boss fight. Actually, I should. Go ahead and describe the build-up to his secret boss fight

You can only access it if you've purchased the optional villa, and if I recall correctly you can only fight him on the last day of the dream. The locked shed next to the villa is revealed to be a library of some kind called the Graveyard of Books and like - sure enough, there's books of every kind just torn apart and scattered about everywhere. The reason for all of this is because of the Informant's jealousy. He is created specifically so he can provide Russell with the necessary information to complete the Happy Dream Experiment, and in this regard he thinks Russell doesn't need anyone other source of information than him. So he does away with the useless other books, except for the strategy guides because that's the only kind of book Russell likes - and thus, the only kind of book that the Informant likes. Notes are scattered in the hallway leading up into his boss room, with the last one sticking out in my mind to this day:

'He thinks he's the most important thing to you.'

Which. I don't know why that line is so important to me. Whether it be because it awakened something weird in me, or because I myself was dealing with my self-loathing in a VERY complicated manner at the time, that line has gone on to dictate the way that I write about my characters even to this day.

It's such a visceral depiction of self-inflicted brutality. Russell Seager is a 14 year-old serial killer who grew up loveless and abused, and has no shortage of things that make every waking moment of his life fucked up. He killed people - some who just happened to be wherever he was at the time, some willingly by his hand - could not feel guilt about any of it, and when he lost Yumi to his drunken father while his nymphomaniac mother watched he snapped and killed both his tormentors. He then turned himself in to the police, a teen on death row. Happy Dream is him discovering guilt through dream versions of the people he killed. Happy Dream is what allows him to manifest the newfound emotions he felt through interacting with the kinds of people that his victims COULD have been. The world he creates morphs into the self-inflicted hell that is his guilt.

Russell has no happy ending, his guilt won't allow him that. Everything around him becomes a reminder of the lives he's destroyed, and how much of a living hell his own life was. Through feeling happiness and love from these fabricated visages of the people he killed, he learned guilt. It's such a weird exercise in sympathy, knowing that you're playing as this remorseless kid going through rehabilitation through extreme means. It either doesn't work, and he's deemed a failure - or it does, and he commits suicide either by confessing his crimes to one of his victims and stabbing himself to death with a syringe, or he stays in the deteriorating dream, never to wake up again.

At some point it honestly just turns into misery porn, if you look at it from a certain angle - this game is set on having Russell die no matter what. I couldn't tell you what EXACTLY it is about this experience was so impactful that it would go on to influence the way I want to spend my life - that is, I want to make games exploring these kinds of themes. Guilt. Sins. If loveless lives can be redeemed and made better. By the time the last day in the game rolls around, it's just a matter of giving Russell closure over his miserable life and choosing for him what his last freedom is going to be.

I think one of the reasons I like thinking about the Informant with regards to Russell is the scene that happens if you choose to go through with the first True Ending. Russell never really much liked the Informant, and the feeling is mutual. Russell is cold to him, and the Informant takes every opportunity he can to rub all of Russell's sins in his face - and that's his job, he represents the fundamental, uncomfortable truths of Happy Dream. If Russell chooses not to leave the dream, he is resigned to its destruction and waits for the inevitable along with the other denizens of Nameless Town. But if Russell chooses to get out of the dream, the Informant returns to Russell in tears, happy that he can finally be back to being a part of him - to this game, it's the ultimate acceptance. Russell then goes on to confess his crimes and the reality of the dream to one of the citizens, and he wakes up when they kill him in tearful retribution by his request.

He grabs the syringe next to his bed, and stabs himself to death, unable to handle the guilt. That's how the game always ends for me. The Informant succeeded, Happy Dream succeeded - and Russell chose to die as person who could finally feel remorse.

It's a regretful story with themes that really shouldn't be replicated in any fashion in real life, but somehow I found it fascinating in the way it explores the facets of the self. It makes me want to ask more questions and explore that angle of self-reflection to the furthest extremes that I can conceivably reach, and I guess that's one of the many reasons why I respect it so much.

SO… WHAT NOW.

Nah, that's kind of it. Like, OF COURSE this isn't all I have to say about the games that I mentioned, but wow this post is so long and I was just pining for the days of a couple of years ago. These games were present for the most transformative years of my life, and uh - whether or not that was actually a good thing remains to be seen, but I'll always be grateful for their presence in the void that I call my gaming experiences.

Horror JRPGs will always have a special place in my heart for how they tell their stories. Nowadays, I've developed more of a taste for fantastical RPGs that prefer to hide their horror in the margins of the narrative, fridging the terror for when the player wants to step back a bit and think about the implications of certain events in the greater world. Undertale, OneShot, and the Octopath Traveler games all tick that box for me - and all of those games are ones I hold dear. Like I'll probably ramble about OneShot some other day, because that's the other game that really changed my life in a way I felt like I can never come back from - but there's just a lot of special things to be said about these neat little self-contained, 6-hour freeware games. For now I'll close this long-ass post out. Happy late Halloween I guess - the M&Ms in our fridge have never tasted better.

[wereh0gz]

Ok. Y'know I don't talk abt current events and stuff all that often. The internet has always been a sort of escape from irl stuff for me, plus i'm not an activist or anything. I'm just Some Guy. But with what's happening rn with Israel and Palestine and how staff keeps doing shady shit both in regards to what's happening rn and with other stuff they've done before, it just makes me feel uncomfy even being an active user here

I've never given them my money or anything, but just being here is starting to make me uncomfortable. They haven't said anything abt these things outright as far as I know, but knowing how things are going on other socials (like deviantart, which I stopped using bc of the blatant pro-israel shit staff there posted recently among other issues, or youtube being. Y'know. Youtube) I have no doubt they're very much pro-israel as well. Stopping Palestine related tags from trending and nuking pro-palestine blogs might as well be a statement on what their stance is even if they try to hide behind technical issues

I just don't want to feel like I'm inadvertently supporting genocide just by being here and using the site. Maybe that's a bit of a reach bc I don't support them financially but idk. It's not like I'd really have anywhere else to go anyways since pretty much every major social has gone this route. My mutuals are all here too and I don't wanna leave y'all. This is like 99% of my social network

Idk if I'm just overthinking. It's late, I'm tired and I'm rambling and I should be sleeping bc I have shit to do tomorrow but I can't stop worrying abt it. Idk

[alanahikarichan]

🧠🐑🐡

🧠 What is a drawing tool you can't live without?

tablet tablet tablet tablet My current digital tablet is cheap as hell, and I only switched from my old monoprice because I got a new computer that was too new for my dear old tablet's drivers-- but god I remember the days of drawing and doing lineart with a mouse! I will not go back to them!

🐑 Do you listen to/watch anything while you draw?

yes! I frequently use drawing as time to also listen to a new album or band, since I'm in one place for a long time without anything else happening to my ears. (I can't watch things while drawing, but when I'm doing other crafts, I'll frequently have someone doing a different kind of craft up on youtube-- I'll do papercraft to someone sewing!-- or video essays or commentary/reaction videos.)

Last thing I was working on (that I haven't posted yet because it's for an exchange lol) got me through several Dirt Poor Robins albums (they're good but the first song of theirs I heard, But Never A Key, is still my fave).

🐡 What is something you worried about a lot when you first started, and why don't you worry about it any more?

god uhhh I started drawing and making art when I was, like, really REALLY young. My grandmother was an artist and she was teaching me about perspective and stuff years ahead of art classes! And while I don't think my art as a middleschooler or highschooler was, like... good, I think my biggest concerns at the time were how best to draw fursona paws. I guess I'm less concerned about measuring up to my favorite artists on deviantArt now?? The art I used to look at like :O!!! when I was 12 I now know relied heavily on mediums I didn't have access to as a kid (like alcohol markers) which are now way more widely available and that I can purchase for myself, AND my digital art has definitely leveled up in the past twenty years, AND a lot of the people I'm most excited to see art from aren't the people with incredibly high levels of polish-- high polish is nice and all but enthusiasm, passion, and a really funny joke or gut-punch idea are things I value a lot more now. Also I don't ever go to dA anymore so that helps lol

[semi-sketchy]

With the recent news, I figured now might be a good time to remind everyone where you can find me.

YouTube - sassycat143 This has been my account for like 14 years, any links to my other socials will be listed on that channel, so it's a good place to keep a permanent bookmark on me. I also have a business email listed on the channel that I sometimes remember to check.

DeviantArt - OfficialSassy DA is kinda dead, but I still like the sorting features and the ability to upload full resolution images, so this is where all my artwork and photography is.

Twitter - ClassySassy143 Let's be real it's not long for the world and I've backed off from posting there, however there are some things only Twitter (I refuse to call it X) has, so I mostly use the account for Splatoon map rotation updates and Pokemon Go news. I still Tweet, just not often.

My Discord is for personal use, so I don't give it out unless it's to a friend or I need instant messaging for a collab. Believe me, it's for the best because despite how I may seem, I am not a talkative person and even though I'm only in a handful of servers, I only send like 8 messages a year in 'em.

I put in for a Bluesky code and am looking into cohost for future alternatives, but I haven't done anything yet. By the time I make up my mind someone will probably have claimed my user on there and I'll have to make up another name again lol

Why not just make the accounts now?

Because I don't want to have a bunch of social media to keep up with and suck my time. The few I have already do enough and are a primary reason I don't use them on my phone. Not to mention, these sites are "hot" right now because of the massive amount of people jumping ship off Twitter, who knows if they'll have any longevity. I've been around and seen enough "YouTube alternatives we should all move to" to know many sites just don't last past the initial hype.

Now I'm not leaving Tumblr. There's so much here and like DA, I love the archive system not to mention how tagging lets you organize and easily find posts later. I don't believe Tumblr is going anywhere anytime soon. Stagnation happens and sites like MySpace still exist. Heck, while I've basically abandoned it, Quotev still exists and has some active users.

But that's the kicker: active users. If Tumblr becomes such a ghost town that I'm basically the only person populating my dash, that'll probably be the time I officially move on. But until that happens...

[shinewonder]

hi!! i just wanted to say i adore ur art and wanted to ask if you post anywhere else too :3

Thank you! I'm glad you like my drawings╰(*°▽°*)╯

This tumblr account is the main one i use and currently the only one i post pictures on, i used to have a deviantart too, but it doesn't have anything posted on it nor do i remember it's password..

I also have two youtube channels! 'Shinewonder' is an account i made back in 2015 so it's riddled with very embarassing things and my native language is the one used, i still use it from time to time, i'm very sentimental over it lol, while 'Shinewonder does stuff' is the channel i'm hoping to use as my main english one, the videos i post here are all posted there as well, i haven't touched it for a while, though i am working on some videos for it right now!

[laulo821]

ur art is sO GOOD do u have any other socials where u post ur stuff

THANK YOU!! <3<3

and yes, if you search @laulo821 on almost any social it's more than likely me!! i mostly post on twitter and tumblr. here's the list for easy access:

i have a twitter THIS IS MY MAIN ART SOCIAL, everything i draw for Tenyoxin is there i have a tiktok i have an instagram (i don't go there often tho) i have a youtube channel i have a deviantart (no link cuz i never go there and i really should clean it up) also i have claimed @laulo821 on HIVE and Mastodon but i haven't posted anything there yet so no link

[jluisjoni]

Oh man, I really haven't posted anything here yet, huh. Well, lemme introduce myself. Hi, my name is Joni, I'm an artist, a Sonic the Hedgehog fan and I go by he/him. Here's my only two finished pieces from this year! The @'s in the pictures are the names of my accounts in other websites, I go by JLuisJoni on Twitter, DeviantArt, Newgrounds, YouTube and Instagram, and ArtsyCraftyJoni for my Art Twitter. If you like what you see, consider following! I'll *try* to be as active as I can, but it's been a while since I've used Tumblr, so bare with me.

[hideawayintheimaginationworld]

Hey how have you been? You really haven't been posting. Just wondering if everythings alright? Its alright if you haven't post much just checking up on you.

I'm honestly not in the right headspace to post anything right now, since I found another YouTuber has used my art without permission, it's really destroyed my motivation in regards to posting things on here and DeviantArt.

[lady-ethne]

I posted this to my Youtube, but since the change on my Youtube I'm also implementing unto my Tumblr to, I'm posting this here to:

As some of you guys know, I am a Christian, a child of the one true God. However, I rarely bring this or any of God's word up because almost none of my posts are about anything from the Bible (though I try to keep things on my socials rated G or PG so any Christian can view my content).

But recently, I've felt like I should start sharing some of God's words more in a small way. As Christians, we are called to spread the Gospel and make disciples of all nations (Matthew 28:19), so it's part of our duty to share our faith to others. I haven't been doing a good job of spreading the Gospel at all, and it's been like this for years. I try to follow Christ's example in my actions (emphasis on "try" because I'm not perfect) but I rarely bring up my faith outside the Church, especially in my online life.

So to help fulfill my spiritual duty, I'm going to start putting a Bible verse in the bottom of my Deviantart and Tumblr art posts when I post art from now on (and in my Youtube desciprition as well). If I make a strictly text post on Tumblr, I'll make a separate post with the verse.

I won't be giving my thoughts on these verses and making a sermon every time I post something online because frankly, I don't feel qualified to do so. I'll just share the verse as it is and let you make your own conclusions about them. Though if anyone has any questions, I'll answer them to the best of my ability, but know that my word isn't going to be 100% theologically correct. You'll have to come to your own conclusions about your own faith using the Bible.

I'm not doing this as a way to brag about my faith. I simply want to fulfill a duty I've been neglecting and share some of God's word with you so that you can be encouraged or have something to think about. And if you're not a Christian, which I know a lot of you aren't, I'm not here to treat you any less because of it. It's not my place to, and only God has the right to Judge someone on their belief or lack of it (James 4:12). We're all humans, we're all imperfect, but no matter if we do believe or do not, we're all loved by a God who sent his son to die for us (John 3:16).

I'm also not changing my content much. I'll still make my fandom stuff, just with some scripture added in.

So let's get started with this! Our first verse of the day is Ephesians 4:32 ESV (I may use other versions on other days):

"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."

That's all. I love you guys and God bless! <3

[murasaki-rose]

So I logged into Deviantart after over a year and am having mixed feelings.

I honestly expected to come back and find a desert of activity when it came to my art. After all, I haven't posted new art there in three years. But people are still interacting with my work. Huh.

It almost makes me want to post there again.

But then I remember how DA mods removed a falsely flagged piece of my art, on the basis of FANON interpretation. It wasn't violating DA policy, but that didn't matter to them. Not only that, but they never replied to my challenge, so it was all facelessly BS reviewed by "people". You know, like the "people" that review false-flagged Youtube videos.

The site layout is still atrocious and awkward as all hell to navigate. Trying to look at the artists and groups I follow is headache-inducing. Why they ditched a functional and easy to use layout for this visual trash I can't fathom.

And let's not forget how DA loaded all our galleries into their garbage AI program without asking us. And yes I know I can "opt-out" of having future art loaded in, but that doesn't undo the outright theft they committed to their entire user base.

It's infuriating. There's no where left on the internet that you can get decent interaction without constantly wondering if you're going to have your work or even account deleted because someone doesn't like what you do and the faceless bots that run these sites will destroy anything "just in case" to avoid displeasing their advertising masters.

I honestly don't know what I should do.

[cherokeegal1975]

Article below is what I wrote on my post on DeviantART for this game idea that I very much know isn't going to happen. I thought it might if I could find the right game developer that would be willing to work with me, but I quickly discovered that game developers do not like outside ideas, especially unsolicited ones. I can't do it myself partly because I can't afford the classes or the resources needed to get it done...and I'd probably need a team, which I'll never get. Also, I look at myself and realize that even though I'd enjoy games and probably do well in them, I write stories okay, but I don't have it in me to create challenges, different outcomes or puzzles. I'm not talented that way. Even so, it was a fun idea to think about. I look forward to putting this artwork into my art journal when I can afford to get it made.

    I created a fake game play screen shot.  I can take credit for the horse and the dragon, both the full characters and the heads, but nothing else.  The rest I found online and made use of them like stickers.  I did add the text though.  Call me lazy if you will, but I just wanted to focus on drawing my characters and sharing my concept.  The game itself will never be made, I don't even know how to do such a thing, much less have the funds to buy the programs to make them.   The closest I can come is do a kind of writing game where I say "This thing is happening, if you choose to go left, click the #1 link, if you choose to go right choose the #2 link and keep reading."  I don't see myself doing that anytime soon...if at all.  It's an idea though.     Both the horse and the dragon are based on small plastic toys that I had as a child.  The drawings look a lot better than the original toys I lost so long ago.  Anyway, the basic game idea is that it's a story based, open world, lots of side quests, puzzles, useful collectibles, possibly a bit of a sandbox thing going on in it, with more than one possible ending.  Both animals can talk, both have abilities that compliment the other.  The main focus will be on content and though it doesn't have to be G-rated, it should not be focused mainly on violence or sexual themes.     So what do you think?  I know this isn't the most action packed scene in a game I've ever seen, but use your imagination, this is only one set in a huge world map.  I haven't thought too much on the story plot or anything, only the basic concepts of what I've learned from watching game playthroughs on YouTube.  I gradually learned what kinds of games I like and this one has everything I find fun and appealing in a video game...or so I imagine.     So, tell me what you think of my idea.  I really want to know.

    Update:   (This a journal entry from a few weeks ago, I've already figured out their names and I only added this on to help fill in some detail just in case someone actually wants to take my idea seriously...which I still know is about zero.) I know why a game developer wouldn't want to take my ideas and collaborate with me, they got too many of their own already and want nothing to do with outside help.  It's a shame too, I've got some good ones and just occurred to me that my pink dragon (I can't figure out a name and Rosie won't do because I've got a cat named Rosie here and I don't like to have more than one animal named the same thing even though my dragon isn't real.  Anyone have any suggestions?  Her name was Pink-yellow-blue, but that's a stupid name my child self came up with and I've long since out grown it.) might make a great avatar for a roll playing game in an open world kind of game.   Her abilities are human speech and intelligence, omnivorous, fire breathing, excellent senses of sight, smell and hearing. Very good at digging, powerful jumps, her tail is as prehensile as a monkey's so she can carry objects with it or help her to hang on to things like tree branches.  Her scales make her tough and fire resistant, excellent climbing capabilities, a really good swimmer and her fore feet work like hands.  She can also stand up and walk for short distances on her hind legs so she can use those hands.  She's the size of a large dog, so that means she can go into smaller places the bigger species of dragons can't.  Her only disadvantage is her lack of wings since her kind never had them in the first place.  Also, males have two small horns on their noses and her kind comes in all colors and patterns, so if they show up in the game, no two would look alike.  Her best friend is a black horse with four white socks, a white mark that starts on her forehead and runs all the way down her nose, a white mane and a white tail and silver eyes, who is just a sweet an intelligent horse in spite of her unusual coloring.  (Haven't drawn the horse yet, but I will.  I had almost forgotten that horse.  It's gone too, lost it long before I lost the dragon).  My character's home environment is a enchanted forest full of giant sentient trees that can change themselves to make hollows in their bases the dragons can use as homes.  The trees can also create mischief for the unwary traveler who disrespects them by shifting positions in such a way that the movement is never seen.  This movement can create false paths and get people hopelessly lost if they aren't careful.  This tendency can also aid my character in finding places if she asks them nicely to help her and most likely they will because their relationship with the tree dragons is a friendly one.   Maybe one of the game goals is to have my dragon go on an adventure to rescue her horse friend?  The game could have puzzles included as well as helpful companions that could come along as the game progresses.  I would like the game to have the best graphics.  I did down play the details on my dragon a bit because I wanted to hurry up and finish her.  I've been doing a lot of dragons lately and I've gotten tired of drawing more scales than I can count.  So I just did contours instead and only suggested that she's a scaled dragon.  She's got little lizard like scales except for the ones on her underside and I would love it if that would show up in the game when ever the camera got close enough to see them.   Well, anyway, I am aware that my chances of collaborating a gamer are slim to none, I'm still willing to try to put the suggestion out there just in case someone would take me up on my idea.  This dragon would do great as an avatar.  Not sure of the full plot, but those details could be worked out later by the developer. Also, I think the game controls should have the option to be made to work with a mouse so people on a tight budget don't have to buy a game controller so they can play the game on a laptop.

[tlemo]

Reduced posts explaination + possible hiatus

Hey! How are you? I don't like to leave all three of my followers in the dark, so I'm posting this. My family's trying to move to a new home, and I've been helping with work, so I haven't had time to post much. This is why it took me a while to finish my last raffle, and why I've really slowed down on posting lately.

It's very likely that a hiatus may come up. It probably won't be for too long, but starting from the moment my computer gets packed until it gets put back on another desk, I won't be able to make art or anything else I need the computer for.

I'm closing commisions soon after this is posted. I won't be able to sit down and draw any requests, so there's not much reason in commissioning me right now. If you like what I do and want to commission me when I open back up, consider following one of my social media accounts:

DeviantArt (most active) - https://www.deviantart.com/tlemo

Newgrounds (different username) - https://rebelruby.newgrounds.com

Or if you want to donate and support me, go and head to my Ko-Fi at https://ko-fi.com/tlemo

Once I'm back online, I have some ideas in mind. I'm thinking of starting my Youtube channel back up (link below). I don't have a single idea for a first video yet, but I think I want to post there soon. Also, I'm still considering making accounts on other websites, mainly ArtStation and Fur Affinity.

Youtube (not much there, but maybe soon!): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCV6jK4iz-RmlBm_SQyniJlA

Either way, this hiatus won't be long, so stay tuned until I come back! I'll post this on all my accounts, and I'll do the same once I announce that the hiatus is over.