#i haven't been stung since i was like 7

[tinyturtle-bigcomputer]

Got stung by a wasp :(

[cillianhead]

Strawberry Syrup || Cillian Murphy

summary: A hot day by the pool with your desperate boyfriend <3

Warnings: SMUT!! Dubcon Themes, Unprotected P in V, oral (f receiving), fingering, sex in the pool, public sex, Daddy kink, Food Play (LISTEN.... DON'T ACTUALLY DO THIS STUFF BC ITS UNSANITARY!! (it could give you a UTI or a yeast infection or anything like that D: ), sorta switch!Cillian, squirting, Adult content!! (some sorta self insert bits that are a bit toooooo personal but it's just like a mention of reader having tattoos and stuff hehe) (Age Gap mentions, Cillian is older, Reader is in her mid 20s and he's in his mid 30s) (Cillian is a horndog in this basically)

Short fic since I haven't uploaded anything in a while.

((also stuff in italics... is sort of like memories or something (so stuff in italics isn't necessarily related to the plot... but it's gonna be mixed throughout the whole fic so just a reminder the stuff that is ITALICISED is all stuff that's either "thoughts" or "memories of the past"))

(also currency is talked about and I used the words "dollars" and "cents" because that's just what I'm used to saying? But I know there's like pounds and all the other currencies there are KDSKDSKD)

18+ MINORS DNI

Cillian had been incredibly needy lately, following you everywhere you went like a lost puppy. He just wanted your attention even though he got plenty of it. Well... maybe not this past week. Cillian and you went at it like rabbits, like at least three times a day everyday kind of thing. But you wondered how long it would take for him to get on his knees and beg after getting denied over and over and over again for you to give him (and specifically his raging boner) any sort of attention. You were surprised you had made it even to the seven-day mark. But here you were.

Cillian had turned into a total cranky mess. And you were loving it. Of course, he could get himself off... that's what made it so good, every morning you'd pretend you're asleep while you listened to the sound of him whimpering and whining like a bitch in heat and fisting his cock as he got off to the sight of you 'sleeping'.

And fuck the sweltering summer air didn't help. The aircon was broken and you'd gone through a dozen fans, trying to blow away the hot air. But the heat was making Cillian feel stir-crazy. He had to have you. No matter how hot it was, no matter how sweaty or dehydrated, he had to have you right fucking now.

He had done about a thousand fucking laps of his substantially large swimming pool, trying to work his pent-up frustration and energy out but it only did so well. He had swam until his legs were cramped up, and his eyes stung from the chlorine, leading them to be bloodshot and somehow miraculously making his eyes even bluer (bluer than the aquamarine pool). And there you lie. In that bikini you know is too tight. And he thinks to himself 'Why do you even bother to be in your bikini when it's just the two of us and I can fucking see your entire pussy through that thing anyway?'. You're reading some romance novel, and you're wet but not from the pool. Cillian is rock hard in his soaking and tight swimming shorts, the head of his cock is barely concealed from peaking out. He's dripping wet and he's angry.

"Why de fuck have you been denying me of sex for the past.... 7 days and 15 hours or however de fuck long it's been, girl?" He huffed, sitting down and carelessly grabbing your book (which was fucking printed and published in the 70s... IT CAN'T HANDLE THE WATER) and tossing it to the side, onto the wet ground. You gasp and reach out to grab your book that's been smashed in like a yam and wet and torn apart but Cillian grabs you by your forearms, brushing your new fresh tattoo (the reason you weren't swimming) and making you hiss.

"Ow... why would you do that, Cillian?" You scolded, wriggling in his hold. But you knew what was happening... he was finally taking charge. The thing you loved most about Cillian was how he was so giving and so desperate to please you at all times, like an obedient dog. He was madly in love with you and submissive to your demands, anything you wanted, you'd get. And you'd boss him around in the bedroom but that was fine because Cillian was in love with your pussy too, and whatever it took to get it, he'd do it... even if he had to dress up as a clown to do so. But he was also controlling when he got it most of the time. Though he was nearing 35, he was still like a teenager when it came to you. Dick was hard at just the sight of you and he immediately would need your hand or your mouth (if he was lucky) or even your tight pussy that always wrapped around him so perfectly. It didn't matter where you were... if he was driving, he'd get it... if you were in a public park on a Sunday night, he'd get it... if you were in a grocery store on a Black Friday sale (he'd get it), waiting in line as he ground himself into your ass until he came in his pants... It looked like he was just hugging you from behind. But you had to stand there in horror as he did so because you couldn't make a scene.

"Answer me question... babe..." He whispered as he pressed you down into the softly cushioned sunbathing chair. You were both being cooked in the sun but you were both lathered in sunscreen so it was fine. Oh, the horror on Cillian's face as he watched slather the white creamy liquid over your tits and rubbed the lotion in so incredibly sexually. You didn't even let him touch your tits for this whole week, he was suffering. But Cillian didn't care that his back was already beginning to sunburn, he fucking needed you now and honestly he was so pussy-hungry that he didn't care what it takes to get his dick inside of you. In his eyes you were the lamb and he was the depraved wolf, drooling at the sight of your trembling body beneath him. Ready to be covered in your blood.

"I just..." You shook your head and smiled to yourself, laughing out air as you bit your lip. "I just thought maybe I was letting you have it too much... you were becoming too spoiled..."

"What does that even mean?" He huffed and leaned in, resting his full body weight on top of you so you couldn't move and his hips were aligned with yours so his hard cock could press upright against your nice and warm core. Though still through his swimmers and your thin little bikini thong.

"F-Fuck..." You whimpered, honestly, you had been suffering too... even your vibrator couldn't do it for you, and just the mere pressure of his thick cock up against you... you felt like you could cum. You arched your back involuntarily. "I just... fuck... thought maybe we needed a tolerance break?"

"A fuckin' tolerance break... I'm not a drug darlin' and neither are you, baby you're just depriving yourself of what you need..." He growled right into the shell of your ear, teeth nipping at your neck. "Let me in..." He was a bit drunk and horribly depraved and his voice was like gravel.

"Beg for it," You whispered out and Cillian groaned, this time fully collapsing in on you and laying his head in the crook of your neck, rocking his hips back and forth on yours. He humped you lazily and you allowed it, enjoying the whines he was making and the pleasure that was pulsing within you.

"Please... fucking hell... please..." He moaned with a cry. "I need you so bad... my hand won't do... it just won't do... please Y/N... please baby... let me fuck you... please... let me at least get a taste of ya once again..."

"Show me how good you can go down on me baby and I'll see if you're good enough to put your dick in me..." You hummed and he sighed as he began kissing you sloppily. "You can leave one mark... Cillian... ONE..."

"Thank you... thank you, sweet girl..." Cillian whined, hands beginning to cup your body cautiously. He was so afraid he was going to do something wrong and suddenly you'd deny him even the pleasure of having your clit in his mouth. But as he kissed down your chest his fingers trembled hesitantly over your bikini top, tits begging to be released. "Can I? Please?"

"Go ahead, Cill..." You hummed with a smug smile on your face. His hands instantly moved at your words of approval, tugging the fabric from off of your nipples and popping it into his mouth with a moan. Cillian's eyes closed as he sighed from his nose, finally satisfied for now. His thumb twiddled with your other nipple, causing you to let out breathy whimpers. "F-Fuck... Cillian..."

"Mmmm..." He groans, slobber dripping from his lips as he continues to rut himself into your hips. Cillian's hair was all messy from when he'd been in the pool, ends curling and falling over his face. He looked so pretty with your tit in his mouth.

"You're all mine..." You whispered, running your thumb along his razor-sharp cheekbone, skin softer than silk. "You're my property aren't you, Cillian?" You grabbed him by the nape of his neck, tugging on the roots of the longer hair that grew there. You pulled his head off of your nipple, his mouth agape and he whines like a brat.

"I'm yours, Y/N..." He huffs, leaning back down to keep sucking but you pulled harder on his neck as if he were a misbehaving kitten. "F-Fuck... I'm your property... darling... all yours... please... I just... I just want to please you..." "I know, honey..." You cooed with a smirk as you reached over to the table beside you and picked a strawberry from the batch and popped it in your mouth, sucking on it suggestively. "That's why you're gonna eat me out like your life depends on it..." You're amused as you watch him scramble to lie flat on his stomach between your legs and he watches as you take off your bikini bottoms and spread your legs open wide. His pupils dilated immediately at the sight.

"I've missed this so much," He whines, his voice breaking as he leans in and kisses your pussy. His eyes flutter close at the little taste of you, his mouth hovering ever so slightly above your cunt, not quite touching. His lips touch you again and as he licks up your pussy he moans and fully presses himself in there, snout buried into your clit as his tongue flickered in and out of your gushing hole.

"O-Oh... that's it..." You arch your back as you push his head further into your warmth. He was completely breathing you in now as your thighs squeezed your head but eventually, you felt two hands grab ahold of your shaky thighs and pin them down side by side until you were spread out. It was concerning how easily he was able to bend and shape you into different positions, molding you like clay. It helped that he was impossibly strong as he manhandled you down into this position, eating you out for his own pleasure, not yours.

You were a writhing mess and you felt embarrassed to admit that you were about to cum. "Fuck you need to slow down... need to slow down a bit for me... Cill..." You whimpered, moaning loud enough for the neighbors to hear but you didn't care. But he only sped up, devouring you completely.

He was truly eating your pussy like his life depended on it because it did. Nothing else mattered to him but drinking down the sweet juice that your fruit of a pussy gave him. You may not be a drug but he was addicted to your cunt like it was one. Cillian had an obsession with you and he had an obsession with your perfect so-called 'heavenly' pussy. He wrote songs about you, he wrote poems about the euphoria of having your tight walls wrapped around him at all times, even during. Wet ink on wet skin, black ink smeared across your stomach as he wrote words that were coming into his mind, words you had inked on your skin with a tattoo machine later on.

"Cillian..." You whined loudly, your moan was pornographic, and with the way he could feel your heartbeat pounding against his tongue as he swirled it around your clit. His mouth was masterful and precise as you came on his face. He knew how to make you cum in a way no other did. You truly were soulmates. At least that's what he said. The sound of your whiny voice and how incredibly wet your pussy was, he just knew. So he slipped a finger into you and you seized up and cried as your body spasmed with pleasure. Only one finger made it feel like you were being stretched right open, you were always so tight and wet, and yet you could take so much. You knew he knew he had earned it... he had that look in those steel blue eyes, that cheeky look, full of mischief and lust that he knew it was okay for him to slip a finger in without asking because he was preparing you for what was to come.

"Fuck... Fuck... oh my god..." You had such a dirty mouth but you couldn't help the pathetic and inappropriate words or sounds you were making right now. Your consciousness and being were elsewhere as Cillian pushed you over the edge once more into an impending and mind-shattering orgasm. He slipped in a second finger and you mewled as you felt your cunt uncontrollably spasm as it squirted out onto Cillian's face and soaking his face oncemore. It was as if he had dived right into that 2 meters of water, soaking his entire face and chest, some of it even getting in his hair.

"Give it to me, baby girl... that's it..." He mumbled into your quivering pussy, your clit growing numb. One of his hands moved from its other position on keeping your hips in place to your nipples. He knew you so well and he knew all the buttons to push to make it that much better. It was overwhelming.

"O-Okay... Okay... that's enough... please... Cillian... please..." You cry tapping the top of his head impatiently and hesitantly he slipped his fingers from your sticky cunt and sat back up, pulling your legs over his so his crotch was perfectly aligned with your overstimulated pelvis. "Cillian... baby... I just need a moment..."

"Yeah? That's alright, my love," He whispered and he leaned in and kissed you, smearing your lips and face with your own cum. But at this point you were too drunk on your own pleasure to care, his lips to pretty... too irresistable to deny a kiss. That's one thing you hadn't denied him of... your lips. To kiss of course... nothing else. You made out like horny teenagers but you never did anything... barely touching him over his clothes. Just to get him really hot and bothered.

"I love you..." You whispered into his mouth that's dripping with drool and squirt.

"I love you more," He huffed and laid on you, lying his head on one of your tits and sighing happily. He looked over at all the fruit lying on the table that looked almost as delicious as you. "God that looks like good fruit..."

"Yeah..." You ran your fingers along his freckled back, muscles sculpted perfectly over his pointy shoulder blades. "Got them at the store yesterday... erm... they were on sale for like... two dollars and ninety cents or something..." You shrugged heavily as you began running your fingers through his hair.

"Wow... is that all? That's amazing..." He chirped and he raised his head up to look at your pretty face. "Well... did I prove myself to you, my darling girl?" "Y-Yeah... fuck... you really wanna do it right now?" You mumbled as you looked up into his eyes with a gaze full of love. You were still so sensitive from what had just happened, you hadn't cum like that for A WHOLE WEEK. You felt like you just took a dose of ecstasy. "Can we just cuddle for a bit?"

"Hmm...." He sighed, sitting up on the chair now and gazing down at how sticky your pussy looked and then at the strawberries that looked just as ripe and appetizing. He nodded. "Alright... baby... I'll give ya a little break..." He reached over and grabbed a strawberry from the bunch. It was red like the bruise he left on your neck. And as he bit into the juicy strawberry, he thought of you.

"Is it good?" You asked as you sat up a bit on the chair more and reaching out for one yourself.

"So good," He moaned with a mouthful of strawberry syrup and pulp. "Tastes like you."

"What?" You laughed and blushed as you ate your own strawberry. "You're so stupid..." You snickered as you ate.

"It's just the truth," He shrugged, the tops of his shoulders were flushed from the hot sun but the both of you were enjoying the warmth. "I love you... I am so in love with you... I am the luckiest man alive..."

"God shut up..." You rolled your eyes and smiled bashfully at his praising. But he loved it when you played it coy with him, he thought you were so cute. And he thought you could never look more beautiful, sunkissed and warm in the sun with him. Your hair is a mess and your tits are out and still wet from his spit. The straps of your bikini still help to accentuate your features and make you look like a treat he needs to unwrap.

"God I can't wait to put my cock in you..." He whispered as he pressed the tip of a strawberry to your sternum. The cold perked you up a bit as you watched him drag the strawberry down your stomach and onto your recovering pussy. He pressed the ruby red fruit onto your sticky clit and ran it down even further.

"Cillian... what are you doing... don't-" But you were interrupted by the feeling of an intrusion. He pressed the tip of the rather large and bulbous strawberry into your cunt, soaking it in your ambrosia-like cum. "Oh... Oh my god..." He pressed it in slightly deeper until he was only clutching at the stem and then he pulled it out intact and popped the tip of it into his mouth.

"Mmmm...." He bit into it and pulled it away, the strawberry juice dripping from his lips as he spoke. "Perfect.... so... fucking.... divine..."

You laid back and huffed out. "I can't believe you just did that... oh my god..."

"Did it feel like a cock?" Cillian asked bluntly and with a stupid-cocky grin on his face. "Tell me, Y/N... when you let me put a strawberry in that little cunt of yers... did it feel as good as when I have my dick in ya?" He leaned in and whispered right into your ear as he pressed the open strawberry to your clit and you let out a gasp.

"N-No..." You shook your head and closed your eyes shut. "It didn't... you shouldn't have done that..."

"Tell me how badly you want me inside you..." Cillian was using that voice he knew got to you. That deep and raspy bedroom voice... if he spoke like that to you always... you would commit heinous crimes for him if he told you so. "C'mon... like you said earlier... beg for it... like yer life depends on it..."

You were flustered at the switch in control. You found yourself suddenly helpless to the pleasure that was accumulating within you, a strawberry rubbing your sticky clit in the most perfect rhythm. Cillian was a dirty-minded man when it came to you... and he smirked as he watched you give in to it... you let him get you off with a literal strawberry.

The strawberry juice leaked down your already sopping pussy, making it the perfect treat for Cillian to lean down and make out with your sex and suck up the juice left behind from the fruit. He still feverishly rubbed the half-bitten fruit against your throbbing clit while he licked circles around your hole... where you really needed him.

"Pl-Please... Cillian..." You moaned pathetically, you hated when he made you beg. You let out a bratty huff and rolled your eyes. "Please... I need you..."

"Need me to what?" He smirked as he bit into the strawberry now, one finger inside of you, fingering your g-spot. He was finished with the fruit, mind now fully focused on you as he made you cum all over his fingers, readying you for the stretch of his cock.

"Cillian..." You whined.

"Be a good girl now..."

"Fuck... please... I need you to fuck me... need you to cum in me..." You added that last part with a smirk. You didn't let Cillian cum inside of you always, just to mix it up a little because you knew there was no other feeling out there for him that was like cumming inside of you, it was euphoric for him. You liked playing hard to get. "Please... daddy... put your babies in me?" You reached your hand up and tugged on the chain you had got him for his birthday. And you looked up at him with doe-like eyes that you knew would get him to give in to you and your pleading.

He kissed you instantly and undid his shorts to pull his suffering cock out. It was sensitive and painfully hard and he couldn't wait to bust a load into you. Especially if you were calling him daddy.

"Such a good girl..." He praised as he lined the thick head of his cock up with your pussy. He smeared you with the leaking precum and as he pressed into you, he sighed with pleasure. "I missed being inside you... so much..." Cillian whispered, eyes squeezed shut.

"Please... oh my god..." You arched your back as he stretched you open with his veiny cock. "Daddy...." You cried. "Please... kiss me..."

"Aw... how sweet..." He cooed condescendingly to you as he leaned in and connected your lips but as you opened your mouth he spat right onto your tongue and grabbed ahold of your jaw. "Swallow..." He growled and you did just that and swallowed his spit obediently. "That's right... baby... you belong to me..."

His hips moved and you were deemed speechless as he began fucking you. Your fence only went so high, if someone next door went on their top balcony or even opened their curtains they would see Cillian fucking you like you were in some sort of porno film. You were seeing stars as he rocked his hips in and out of you. It was graceful in the way he moved, like a ballet dancer, every move perfectly choreographed and precise. The tip of his cock was abusing your g-spot repeatedly, to the point you were barely coherent enough to speak. Body limp and mind blank as you were used for all you were good for.

His hands gripped at your hips tightly, rocking you back and forth as he moaned like the slut he was. Cillian was loving every second of this as he thrusted his hips back and forth perfectly spearing you on his cock. You clutched the chair with your left hand and the other left scratch makrs down his poor sunburnt back. But the pain was worth it, the feeling of your warm sticky walls wrapped around him... well... it felt like home. And his eyes rolled into the back of his head as you squeezed around him, he fucked you like an animal, gripping one of your tits in his palm, squeezing it and groaning once more as you clenched around him.

"Daddy.... I'm gonna..." You whined in a high pitch voice, eyebrows knitted together and your tongue hanging heavy on your jaw. "I'm gonna cum... oh my god..." "Cum for me baby, make a mess all over me... please...." He groaned with a sigh as he leaned down and attached his mouth to your other tit, the one he hadn't before. He flexed his hips every time he pressed his cock into you, pressing it deeper in you as he leaked out cum. "I'm gonna cum too..." He huffed, face flushed and sweaty, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

"Please cum inside me..." You moaned as you threw your head back, your orgasm engulfing you. He did just that, biting your neck as he fucked you full of his seed, balls sticky with a mixture of your arousal and his. "Ooh... feels so good..." "Yeah, baby..." He whimpered and pressed his hot lips to the side of your face, leaving sloppy traces of spit along your cheeks until your lips tangled with his. He made out with you as you rode out your high, your entire body was overflowing with love and the white-hot blinding pleasure. You still felt so full and stretched out on him but then he slowly eased his movements and pulled out, biting his lip. "God..." Cillian gasped, sitting up and looking down at your pussy that now seeped out his cum. "So pretty..."

"Please... hold me..." You pouted, reaching out your heavy arms to have him lie on top of you again. "Need to feel you... daddy..."

Cillian obliged happily, scooping you up in his arms and shifting so you were lying in his lap with your head on his shoulder. He held you and kissed your head. "I love you so much, you know that right?" He whispered into your scalp that he smelled with a smile on his lips.

"I love you more..." You grinned bashfully, running your nose along his collarbone and neck. You just loved the way he smelled. It wasn't his cologne or anything... it was just the way he smelled. You were addicted to it. "That was so good... can't believe we went a whole week without it..."

Cillian snickered and nodded. "Yeah... if you give me a couple of minutes ill be able to go at it again..." He smirked, cheeks rosy as he looked at you fondly.

"God shut up... you sillyhead..." You ruffled his wet hair and kissed the tip of his nose as you two laid there. Eventually you would go inside and he'd sneak himself into your shower where you'd fuck him against the wall while still covered in your strawberry-syrup body wash.

-----

It's summer here and I am dying from the heat and the idea of physically touching anyone right now is so ugh... EW... but Cillian is the only exception of course.

Hope you enjoyed this little fic... I know it's short but I wanted to give you guys something... the third part to Red Eyes and A Pair of New Glasses will be out soon I promise :)...

[selarina]

Ghosts in Love

-> Suna Rintaro x Reader

Chapter 1: In the Meat and Dairy Isle

Summary: Amidst shared streets and familiar alleys, chance encounters with your ex at grocery stores or parks evolve into shopping together and sharing park benches.

Loosely inspired by the poem "Ghosts in Love" by Carl Sandburg

Chapter Warning: exes, domestic angst lmao

Words: 1k words

Taglist: Open

Read on AO3 | Series Masterlist

You and Suna Rintaro have purchased tickets for a concert that is almost a year away.

Neither of you have canceled the booking for those tickets. Neither of you have tried to sell it off. It just lies there in the pile of your dusty emails. No attempt is made to delete it. You just let it make a home there, catching dust until you decide to reopen and read it again. And again.

It’s been 7 months since the two of you have broken up and you're wondering if you really need to get rid of them. You only mean, things have significantly mellowed down to a point where you go grocery shopping together, in a manner of speaking.

You still live in the same neighbourhood as him, so days of running into him at the grocery store, the park, or the laundromat have turned into days of shopping together, sharing a park bench, or using the same washing machine if there’s room. Cheaper that way, the two of you reason out.

So you've decided to bring it up at your next weekly run-in.

Except, you don’t see him all week. Or the week after that.

It’s odd but you don’t ruminate, you don’t have the time to. It’s the end of the month and you have deadlines that keep swamping up all over your calendar. And you also have a company ball to prepare for.

"Hey," he says, bopping your cold nose. You think that must have been instinct, because he brings his hand back down almost immediately at the touch. Like it stung to you, or that he's simply repulsed.

But you see him again, on a gloomy day. It’s raining on and off and everything is sticky. You’re sweating but you’re also cold as you stand opposite him in the meat and dairy aisle of the grocery store. His hair has grown a little, and it cascades across his face like a flood of dark water.

Your gaze is now drawn to the yogurt section as you look for the brand you usually use. A soft pink package. He lingers behind you through this, and you’re conscious of his movements. You wonder if he can see right through you, but it's a thought that only lasts for a split moment. He never really did understand you that well, you think.

"Haven't seen you in a while," you remark glibly as you toss a can of milk into your basket.

But it's a lot more intense in your head, and you find that your defences are back up. Why? You aren't sure, but you strongly believe that you will find out today.

“Yeah,” he says. You wait for a moment until you realize he isn’t going to explain himself. He doesn't have to after all.

“How have you been?” you try to change the topic.

“Fine, a bit restless. We haven’t had practices for a while,” he says. You proceed to basket the yogurt, along with some cheese.

You’re both sitting in a park now, just about to part ways before he says, “I went on a date.”

You hum in response.

—

The evening passes by as the two of you slip into the inevitable flow of a conversation.

You’re finally grateful you braced yourself for the inevitable.

You can’t say it doesn’t hurt, but it only hurts like a sting, rather than a typhoon. Right now, you’re too muddled with questions. Questions you don’t have the right to ask.

You don’t say anything.

A beat later, you ask, “Why are you telling me this?”

“I–I really don’t know actually,” he chuckles, and for the very first time, you hate it.

You hate the way his cheeks hollow into soft undefined dimples, you hate the crinkle at the edge of his eyes, and most of all you think you hate him in this moment.

“What?” It comes out before you can stop it, and nurture it into something more mellow — but right now, your anger seeps through your mouth and spits onto his face.

“Okay. Um, I really did need to leave so,” you say, and with a swoop you push yourself up.

This time you move quicker, walking away to leave but he stops you. His hand comes up to clutch your wrist. It's not tight enough for you to not walk away but you stop.

“I’m sorry,” he says and he seems genuine, which makes you hate him even more.

“It’s okay, Rin.” You say, because you could nurture your anger into something different. You’re definitely not okay, but you can pretend you think. For a bit, until you no longer have to pretend.

“Please, ca—just sit with me.” He says, and the wind blows, sending a chill down your back but you sit down anyway because you’ve never truly been good at telling him no. Not when it mattered, at least.

“Thank you,” he mutters.

You don’t speak for the rest of the time. The two of you just sit there, and your anger dies and it dies, and you almost forget about all of it, because this is nice right?

This is comfortable and familiar, and it makes you wish you could turn time back, at least in your head. But it’s abruptly met with a stop, when he speaks again, “It was bad.”

“I figured,” you say.

You hum, urging him to continue. Reluctant but ready.

“The date, I mean," he elaborates.

“I don’t think I’m over you yet,” he says. “It’s killing me just a bit, I think.” He tries to soften the sentence with a chuckle.

“I think that would kill me more,” he says soft as a whisper, you could barely hear it. It almost made you assume it was just the wind playing tricks on you.

“Want me to change neighbourhoods so you can move on then?”

Your words come out sounding a bit condescending but you have a soft edge to your voice, a lilt of humour if you will, like it’s amusing that you would ever do something like this for him. Would you?

“Anyway, it should be you if one of us is moving,” you say.

“Well, I was here first. It’s only fair,” you say, firmly.

“Me? No way,” he says, his pitch rising. “It’s closer to practice, and the home office."

He doesn’t say anything for a bit. You were here first, you were more in tune with this area than he was. Most of his favourite things about this neighbourhood are borrowed, he realizes. They're all yours.

At that, he feels a bit empty, “That’s actually fair.” He adds, “I’d rather neither of us have to move. I’d rather us be friends.”

“Me too, Rin.” You smile at him.

Only you can’t help but think about how it sounds like a distant fantasy, reminiscent of dream-addled childhood dreams where you thought of driving yourself across the country. You reassure yourself because you can drive now at least.

[wibixthecowboy]

Play the Song: Chapter 13: Sweet like Candy

Task Force 141 needs a new sniper and despite their complaints, they're assigned Flash, a joke-making, ABBA-listening, 20-year-old sharpshooter with better aim than the whole team combined. In other words, Ghost is practically handed the love of his life but he needs time to adjust because she's a firecracker.

Warnings/Tags: !graphic depictions of panic attacks!, references to suicide attempts (no descriptions), references to SA (no descriptions), Age gap (20/30-32), gore, descriptions of injury/blood/wounds, justified angst, tooth rotting fluff, slow burn, protective ghost, family dynamic, big brother soap has an attitude problem, father figure Price, wholesome brother Gaz, touch starved Ghost, eventual smut, praise, choking, thigh riding, unprotected (wrap it up people), size kink, oral f receiving, ghost will do anything to get his dick sucked, idk I’m sure it will get dirtier as I go, shifting POV  

A/N: Holy Fuck. Excuse my language but jesus. That last quarter literally gutted me. BUT I PERSIST. Here is what I think is the longest chapter by far? idk I haven't checked. Thank you for sticking around for so long. Smooches for everyone, enjoy! Also! I know the chapter links are broken :( , I'll fix them asap!

Words: 7.8k

Side note: All of these characters are fictional! Please don’t be weird about their real life actors, leave them out of this and be respectful!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

@urfavsunkissedleo@butskii@abbiesxox@itsasecrets-things@thatonewriterthatnooneknows@copiasratscheese​ @Sheviro-blog @Simonsslvt

★Flash

Dust swirls up into a small cloud, forced into motion by Flash's incessant kicking. It travels a few feet before dissipating into the bitter morning wind. She shivers again in the thin cotton of her pajama shirt and sweats and debates going back in. Debates sliding the small phone back into her pocket, shoving off the single stair in front of the base doors, and throwing herself back into her sheets. They'd be cold by now, it's been nearly an hour since she'd tossed back her blanket, dug the phone out of her duffel bag, and sat herself down outside to call her sister. Well, attempt to call her sister. It's been over five years since they'd last talked, when she'd stuck fifteen-year-old Flash on a transit bus to Arizona with a small backpack of keepsakes and photocopies of her registration papers for the Safford Advanced Military Academy. She’d sent a few letters, from the cramped desk in her first dorm but had never gotten any back. The constant schoolwork was a good distraction but it still stung.

Filling her lungs to a near painful capacity, Flash double checks the faded sticky note her sister had slipped into her pocket so many years ago and then the glowing numbers on her phone before shutting her eyes and jamming her thumb into the call button. Flash's breath is stuck in her throat, stilled in anticipation almost as if its waiting alongside her as the phone rings. Much to her surprise, she picks up by the fourth ring.

"Hello?"

She sticks her head between her knees, absolutely convinced last nights dinner is about to come up but after a few breaths her vision clears and she answers in a rush of air.

"Sarah?"

"Who is this?"

Flash tries to swallow back the disappointment building in her stomach and then,

"Grace? Is that you?"

The dinner does come up now and she barely manages to make it to the sad cluster of shrubs before the sting of bile burns up her throat. The world caves beneath her, sucking her chest through the souls of her feet. It ricochets through her brain, slamming hard at each turn. Grace Grace Grace. She gags again, wiping her mouth on the cold skin of her forearm. 

"Hi." She manages, the sound of her voice echoes between her ears. "Yes its me."

"Are you okay- did you just throw up?" Her sister's voice is calm as always, despite not hearing it for several years, the cooling affect is just the same. Sarah was- is the personification of winter. Cold, calm, and biting if you stayed with it for too long. But she's the only person who's ever been there every time Flash really needed her.

"Yeah, I uh," a burning gasp breaks her words and she realizes she hasn't been breathing. "I don't know I think I ate something funny."

"Okay." There's an awkward pause and when Sarah realizes Flash isn't going to say anything she continues. "Did you need something?"

It's at this moment that Flash remembers why she hadn't ever called. Sarah was an expert at talking people off a ledge. Every time Flash got into a fight, Sarah was able to smooth things over with a carefully plated store-bought box of cookies and a sweet smiled promise. But when it came to dealing with Flash and her inferno of a temper, Sarah chose to sit on the sidelines and watch as Flash burnt herself over and over. If it wasn't causing harm to others, Sarah didn't bother. But years of burning herself meant Flash had developed calluses. 

"Is Taryn there?" The words are bitter, whether from the bile souring her mouth or the stinging disappointment, she doesn’t know.

Taryn was Sarah's on-and-off girlfriend and the only woman in Flash's life that gave her the softness she so desperately craved. If Sarah was winter, Taryn was Spring. On the days she came over, windows were opened, wildflowers were picked, neatly arranged in vases, and dinner was always something with potatoes. Taryn had made their small two-bedroom crash pad into a home. How Taryn and her sister had made it work was beyond her.

"Um- yeah, she's here. One second."

There's a rustling as Sarah drops the phone from her ear and then a murmuring of voices, even through the lowered phone she can hear the way Sarah's voice softens as she speaks to Taryn. She'd never spoken to Flash that way.  

"Gracie?"

"Hello?" Flash's response comes out broken and half-whispered and with all the heavy emotion that she’d secretly hoped she’d feel when speaking with her sister. 

"Gracie! Hi!" Taryn's sweet honey voice pours from the speaker, still soft from sleep and the tears building behind Flash's eyes begin to burn. "How are you, sweetheart? It's been forever."

"Good- good. I've been good." She presses her knuckles against her eyes until colors bloom against the backs of her eyelids, unshed tears wetting her fingers. "I just had a question."

"Oh?" There's another round of rustling and Flash can picture her sitting up in bed, blindly grabbing at her side table before fixing the round pair of tortoiseshell glasses she wore over blinking eyes. 

"And what's your question?"

"When you met Sarah," Flash rubs a hand roughly down her face before glancing around, "how did you know?"

"How did I know what?" Taryn's interest has clearly been piqued.

"You know." She hesitates before sighing and feeling five years younger, mutters, "That you liked her."

"It took having a crush for you to finally call me?"

"I don't know, maybe?" There’s another silence, but unlike with Sarah, Flash know’s it’s Taryn waiting patiently for her to find the words that sometimes tangled themselves when making the journey from brain to tongue. "Yes. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize honey. I'm glad you did, it's nice to hear your voice." Then she continues on, like it hasn’t been five years, and when she closes her eyes, Flash can see the pink sundress Taryn had worn the last time she’d seen her. The hem had been stained burgandy the week before by Flash’s impatient blackberry painted fingers. "It was kind of love at first sight.”

Flash, either in a desperate attempt to hear to a story not about the plight of terrorists, or simply because Taryn’s voice made the world brighter, listened to her whole story. How when Taryn had met Sarah, she’d been enthralled, and even more so when Flash had threatened to break her arm if Taryn broke Sarah’s heart. How she’d so quickly decided that Sarah was the one for her despite Sarah’s supposed lack of interest and to both Flash and Taryns dismay, her complete and utter denial of being at least bisexual. 

Another kick sends more dirt floating along the breeze and Flash struggles to find a way to ask for advice. ‘I’m actually talking about my lieutenant.’ ‘Oh, you didn’t know? I’m not fifteen anymore, I’ve actually killed several people.’ ‘Anyways, I want to fuck the life out of him but when I touch him he looks like he’s either going to piss his pants or bend me over the counter.’ or maybe just ‘How do I get over the deeply rooted fear of love that my dead father and might-as-well-be-dead sister instilled in me at a young age?’. She’s debating rephrasing the last one when a sharp cry cuts through Taryn’s retelling of her and Sarah’s first date. 

“Is that a baby?” Flash’s voice is sharper than she meant it to be. “Do you have-”

She’s cut off by a fake laugh and a breathily muttered ‘no’. Taryn never cut her off.

“No don’t be silly.” Another nervous laugh. “I have to go, Sarah needs me. But do call again! Let me give you my number so you can call my cell next time.” 

Flash listens numbly as she prattles off a long list of numbers, more focused on the static noise around her words. Waiting to hear another cry. When it doesn’t come Flash just shakes her head and tunes back in just in time to hear Taryn mutter another ‘goodbye’ and the quiet buzz of a dead line.

She blinks a few times, simultaneously overwhelmed and underwhelmed by the call. And then the last few sentences Taryn had left her with slowly start to trickle to the front of her mind. In a rush, Flash flies through the front doors of the base, nearly dropping her phone in the process, grabs a pen from the table and scribbles the number along her forearm, hoping to god she’d remembered it correctly. Hoping she could survive another icily quipped sentence from her sister if not. 

Its then, mouth still gross and breathily reciting Taryn’s number in a desperate attempt to recall the sequence, that the sound of footsteps pulls her attention to the hallway. It’s the team, minus Price who���d left an hour earlier, and only gave Flash a fleeting worried look and a head shake as he passed her on the front steps, to get a headstart in traveling Alejandro’s farmhouse. 

Soap leads the group, hands tucked neatly into the front of his cargo pants. Behind him, Gaz is nearly identical in both stature and clothing, but unlike Soap, his hands fall confidently at his sides. Ghost, seemingly the odd one out, trails a few feet behind, dressed sharply as usual, but there are two distinct purple smudges under his eyes. They pass through the poorly crafted living room before each settling in their respective spots at the table, like an aged high school clique. She’s about to make a remark on this when Soap raises a brow at her. 

“And what are you doin’ lookin’ like that?” His hand waves up and down her body, at it hunched over the table. “We leave in like-” He glances down at his watch, “An hour?”

Ghost sits down heavily in the chair across from her and his eyes almost immediately fall to the messy set of numbers scrawled on her skin. His dark gaze narrows just the slightest bit and Flash can already see him jumping to conclusions. 

“I called my sister.” She blurts out, both to answer Soap and to stop whatever train of thought is starting in Ghost’s head. She’s not sure why she feels the need to defend herself. The three men sitting around her freeze, stopping their respective tasks to listen. “I uh- yeah.” 

“How did it go?” Gaz asks smoothly when the silence has stretched just a few seconds too long. “I didn’t know you had a sister.” 

He slides into the seat next to her, leaning on his arm and giving her just a tad too much concentration. It was times like these when Flash wondered if Gaz operated a black market of gossip, too eager and always asking the right questions. 

“We don’t talk.” Flash’s eyes flick up to see Ghost watching her warily. “Not for five years at least.” 

Gaz raises his brows but doesn’t say anything, just pitches his mouth down in the corner, enough that Flash know’s he’s no longer fishing for details. Part of her wonders just how much he knows.  

She looks across the table at Soap, sitting silent in his chair, picking at his nails, and suddenly becomes aware of the space left between him and Ghost. Now, after hearing Soaps late night confession the day before, the signs are obvious, like Soap has the words ‘I fucked my superior and now we don’t talk about it’ scrawled across his forehead in bright red pen. She clears her throat, 

“It was fine, I just called for-” She hesitates, still not quite sure why she’s telling them this. Maybe Taryn’s sweet tongued optimism rubbed off on her too much. “I just needed some sister advice.” Flash finishes with a shrug, hoping the burn on her cheeks isn’t too obvious. 

“I get that.” Soap starts, and Flash almost jumps at his voice, deep and raspy from sleep. “I’ve got my own sister. She can be annoyin’ as shit but she’s got some good advice.” 

“And what are you getting advice for.” Gaz teases, “You haven’t had game for the last year.” His words falter at the end and Flash doesn’t need any explanation to know he’s talking about Ghost and Soap’s relationship, or whatever the hell Soap had called it. In a quick attempt to smooth things over, she looks expectantly across to Ghost. 

“No. No siblings.” He says, and Flash watches the way his eyes fall to the worn table in front of him.  

“That's too bad.” Flash says, kicking him lightly under the table, “They’re a pain in the ass anyways.” This time, when he glances back up, she smiles at him with her teeth, remembering the way he’d so carefully parted her lips in the bathroom the night before. Something in his gaze shifts and his mouth moves under his mask, pulling up at the corners. But before she can see the full thing, he’s standing and moving towards the kitchen. Glassware clinks around, he pulls one of the bowls from the cupboard and stands at the sink, waiting awkwardly. She catches on a moment later and sits up.

“I’ll go back to my room while you guys eat.” She says, trying not to let the gesture sting too badly. “I’ve got to pack for the trip anyways.” 

As soon as she turns her back, even though she know’s its impossible, the rustling of Ghost pulling off his balaclava echoes through the concrete room. Just incase she has a sudden loss of self control and turns to see him making his breakfast unmasked, Flash speeds up her pace and practically throws herself through her door. 

Leaning against the foot of her bed is an empty duffel bag and next to it a small, half-filled laundry sack. In it are the clothes from that night. Just underwear, a tank top, and her favorite pair of cargo pants. All her other layers had either been torn or cut through. They’d been sent through the wash five times now, but every time she’d braved the task of opening the synched bag, a staggering fear grasped her so tightly that she would pull it shut and give it back to Price. He took it wordlessly every time and they would both pretend. Her muttering something about there still being blood and him nodding while sending it along with the rest of the laundry. Both of them knew the clothes were clean, practically washed thin, but she could smell the brine of the sea, the gory mess of the man as he splattered across her shirt without even opening the bag. 

So instead of kicking it to the side, or ignoring the sad, knowing look in Price’s eyes as she shoves the unopened sack into his hands again, she picks it up and sets it on the unmade sheets of her bed. Her hands shake violently and it almost makes her laugh, how they vibrate when the canvas whispers open.

On the top of the neatly folded pile is a small scrap of notebook paper. When she leans in closer, she can make out a single line of familiar scratchy handwriting ‘you’ve got this kiddo :)’. Tears burn behind her eyes as she picks the note up and sets it aside, reading it one more time before her eyes are too watery to see, and reaches into the bag to pull out the tank top. Her hands still shake, and the fold is done horribly, one strap sits higher up than the other making the whole thing a bit lopsided, but she finishes. The pants follow suit, folded neater this time. She picks them both up, along with the underwear, and shoves them into their respective drawers before leaning heavily against her dresser.

Taking a shaky breath, Flash turns to slide down the side of the solid wood, wedging herself between the wall and dresser she lets her head fall between her knees. There, away from the view of the laundry bag and clothes, she lets the adrenaline drain down her limbs and through her fingertips that rest on the cold floor. It shakes her body and looses a few broken sobs, but she’s alive and the clothes are folded. 

★Ghost

He waits outside of Flash’s door, hand half raised, fingers curled in a fist to knock. Soap had sent him to give her a thirty-minute warning which would now end up being a twenty-five minute warning. Shaking his hand out one more time, he raises his fist, and right as he's about to knock, the door swings open.

Flash stands in front of him, looking down at the duffel bag in her hand. She jerks back when she sees him. Just for a moment, in the few seconds, it takes for her to recover and slide back on her happy-go-lucky smile, he can see the crease at her brow and a small frown tugging the soft shape of her lips down.  

“You ready?” She asks, and Ghost nearly forgets that she is the one they’re waiting on. 

“Yeah.” He starts, and all the confidence he had built, all the words he’d carefully laid out for hours the night before wash away at the sight of her. “We uh- Gaz took the Jeep.” Flash nods for him to continue, and he does after another deep breath. “You, me, and Soap will be taking the truck with the rest of the equipment.” 

Flash watches him carefully, eyes flicking over every inch of skin his mask leaves uncovered. It’s this hungry gaze of hers, the one that scares the shit out of him, that she gives him before responding. Completely ignoring his words. 

“You didn’t sleep?” She says but doesn’t wait for him to answer. “Me neither.”  

Flash shoves her bag into his hand and jogs towards the front door, already arguing with Soap about her “perfectly valid” license. He carries both their bags in one arm and decides that it's the weight of their bags that is slowing him down. Not the fact that Soap reaching the truck first meant he and Flash would be stuck in the back together, strapped to a single bench. He wanted to thank whatever officer had replaced the passenger seat with a now out-of-date comms system.

_____

An hour in, Flash’s cheek is pressed hard into the knuckles of her fist and a shiny patch of drool starting at the corner of her mouth. He both envies her sleep abilities and fears them. 

When his eyes drift back to the landscape outside the windshield, his gaze catches on Soap watching them through the rearview. He struggles to remember if the mirror used to be angled down that far or if Soap had intentionally moved it to watch them. 

“So things are getting pretty serious?” He asks, not taking his eyes off the poorly paved road in front of him. Although he says it jokingly, Ghost can see the underlying curiosity, maybe even a twinge of jealousy. 

“We’re not doing this right now Johnny.” Ghost grumbles, keeping his arms tight over his chest, as if they could create a barrier against Soap’s prying eyes. He knows better. Years of using little to no communication during deployment meant that learning each other's body language was critical, especially in cramped bunks. 

Soap just shakes his head, still not taking his eyes off the road. Ghost can practically watch the countdown until his next snarky remark. A slow scrunch of his brow, followed by a slight downturn of his mouth, before- right on the mark, Soap drags a rough hand down the left side of his face before finally speaking. 

“Has she seen you without your mask?” 

Ghost’s eyes snap to Soap’s, still waiting for biting words to follow, to snap at a tender spot only he knows how to find. Instead it’s something much, much, worse. 

“Just remember what happened last time.”

The words slither through the air between them, squeezing around his ribs before sliding down to stoke the coals of fear burning in his stomach. The cab of the truck is too small and suddenly the heat of Flash’s body pressed so close is so present in his mind that if he doesn’t back away he might just- stop. Stop.

“Pull over.” He mumbles, staring into the dead space between horizon and road. 

Soap obliges wordlessly, slowing the truck to a slow roll before stopping in a cloud of dust on the shoulder. Ghost steps out, stumbling over the edge of the pavement as he braces his hands against his knees and heaves great breaths of warm desert air. 

The sound of a door opening behind him has his shoulders raising to his ears, a poor imitation of hackles. 

“Stop!” He clears his throat before lowering his voice and trying again. “I’m fine. Get back in the truck.” 

But the sound of footsteps persists, light and barely audible, despite the thin layer of gravel coating the road and landscape around them. When he turns, Flash is standing behind him. Her face is pink with sleep, an impression of the seatbelt running from her mouth to her ear, and one side of her hair has been rubbed upward, making her braided hair lopsided. When her eyes fall on his hunched shoulders, the freckled bridge of her nose scrunches. 

“Whats going on?” She asks suddenly, growing more aware. “Are you getting sick?” 

When he doesn’t answer, she steps closer, resting a hand between his shoulder blades. Ghost can't help the low sound that pushes from his chest. She keeps it there, rubbing circles into the expanse between his shoulder blades. 

“It’s okay,” Flash starts, still soothing his hunched shoulders back down. “I get sick too, just on plane rides. I don’t know what it is.” She laughs once, bright and musical. “Maybe the forty thousand feet in the air bit.” 

Ghost’s breaths come easier now, in through his nose and streamlined from his pursed lips, the way his psychiatrist had shown him. The small pouch of his pills sit comfortingly in his breast pocket, but he lets them stay there. Finally, he turns to face Flash, reluctantly letting the warmth of her palm fall from his back. 

“Yeah.” The word comes out staticky, like when the comms are just a bit too far apart. “That part is pretty shitty.” He doesn’t know why he’s agreeing with her. He’s never once felt an ounce of fear flying on a plane. There’s no point when everything is already so far out of his control. But when her lips split and reveal an amused smile he understands why. 

“C’mon.” Flash grasps his hand, pulling him back towards the truck. He hadn’t realized just how far he’d stumbled. “I’m sure we have something in the truck for nausea.” 

Ghost just nods and follows her lead, sliding smoothly onto the bench of the truck and shutting the door behind him. Flash carefully slips her pinky finger around his, squeezing tightly. And that single act sends a rush of heat through his chest both pleasant and burning. She knew. She knew damn well he wasn’t car sick. Soap says nothing.

Instead of folding his hands underneath his arms like usual, Ghost lets them be. One gently grasping the safety handle, and the other tucked neatly under Flash’s tracing fingers. And does his best to ignore the eyes watching them from the mirror. 

★Flash

Flash, in a desperate attempt to get out of the truck, barely manages to let it stop before bursting out and jogging a few short laps around the vehicle. 

“Jesus kid.” Soap swears, stepping out of the cab and stretching his arms overhead. “Weren’t you just sleeping like-” a disbelieving glance at his wristwatch, “three minutes ago.” 

“Four fucking hours.” She bites as Ghost slides from the back. “That’s basically abuse.” 

In a desperate attempt to relieve the cramping behind her thighs, Flash bends forward, slipping her hands under her sneakers. A relieved moan splits her lips, muffled into the fabric of her pants. Careful not to go light-headed, she slowly straightens out before reaching her hands above her and pushing her chest out. It feels fucking amazing.

When she finishes and turns to the two guys behind her, she can’t help but laugh. Ghost’s face is turned away, eyes downcast in a way that promises Flash his cheeks are burning hot. Soap glances between the two of them before laughing loudly and stalking off toward the large building that, in Flash’s humble opinion, does not look anything like a farmhouse. If it weren’t for the large yellow barn nestled into the field next to it, the large concrete building would probably look like a prison. 

Flash is about to follow after Soap, both eager to get to the briefing, and much to her annoyance, nervous to see Alejandro and Valeria, when a gentle hand grasps her elbow. She turns to find Ghost, still hovering near the car, one hand held behind his back. 

“Whats up?” She asks, eyeing his hidden hand and taking a few curious steps towards him. 

“I uh-” Ghost stutters in a way that two days before would leave Flash shellshocked, but after seeing him so vulnerable the night before, she just nods for him to continue. “I have something for you.” 

“Ooh a gift?” Flash says, trying to peek around his body, but the bulk of his shoulders easily blocks her vision. 

“It’s nothing, really. Just something small. I didn’t think you had one and you were looking at it. Then there was that guy.” He rambles, ducking his head slightly. 

Flash has to squeeze her hands into fists to keep from grabbing his face and kissing him. Even through the mask would be better than nothing, but the few moments of silence that lapse between his rambles and her watching the way his hand endearingly fidgets at his belt helps her somewhat regain her self control. 

“If it’s important to you. It’s important to me.” She says softly and steps closer. “Now let me see.” 

He hesitates for one more second before pulling his hand from behind him and showing her a folded blue square in his hand. Flash’s heart stops for a moment and then starts back up so fast that she nearly passes out. It’s the cerulean scarf she’d seen at the market.

“Ghost-” Her voice catches as she reaches up and pulls the silk from his hand, mouth suddenly dry.

“I just thought it would help, the dust is bad and- I think I got the right one, the blue right-” 

He’s cut off with a huff as Flash throws herself against him. She wraps her arms around his chest squeezing hard. The rough velco of his vest scrapes her cheek, and something is pushing painfully against her ear, but she doesn’t let go. 

“Thank you.” She says quietly. 

The words, muffled into his chest, are barely audible. He doesn’t respond, but a few moments later, she feels a hand rest lightly against her shoulderblades. When she doesn’t let go, his other hand slides up, pulling her into him.  

“Let's head in,” Flash says, reluctantly pulling away and sliding her hand into his, before tugging him towards the "farmhouse". 

They make it just a few paces before he slides his hand from hers and takes two measured steps in front of her. Flash is about to question him, but leaning against the open door of the farmhouse is Alejandro, handsome as ever.

"We've been waiting." He nods to Ghost, shifting out of the doorway to let him pass. Flash watches him go with a confused glare. "Everything okay Rubia."

"Yeah," She breathes, brushing past him without looking at his face. "Everything's fine."

_____

Much to her disappointment. The briefing is not as entertaining as she’d thought it would be. Both Alejandro and Price would be making final decisions tonight. This briefing was only to go over the information they already knew. But she still listened diligently and took her notes at appropriate times. Alejandro didn’t do so much as glance in her direction as he spoke, both he and Valeria remained impassive during the meeting. It made Flash wonder how many of the people sitting around her had shared a bed with them. Her eyes land on Gaz, who seems to be a little too focused on Alejandro's hands as he retraces a path on one of the topograph maps. She glances over to Ghost, hoping to point his attention to Gaz and his drooling mouth, but he stays facing the front of the room. Even when she stares at him, practically burning holes into the back of his masked head, he doesn’t turn around. So when the lights shut off and the projector whirs to life, she grabs the pen resting next to his paper, making a point to doodle little hearts at the corner of her paper when he finally looks her way. Instead of shaking his head and laughing like he usually does in response to her minor thievery, he pulls another pen from his pocket and holds it in his hand. 

Annoyed at Ghost's sudden coldness and bored out of her mind, Flash turns to Gaz to whisper in his ear, 

“Do you think if you stare at his crotch enough, you’ll see through his pants?” 

His face goes bright red and a stuttered cough cuts off the briefing. 

“You okay Gaz?” Alejandro asks, raising a dark brow as Gaz hits his chest with a fist, still coughing.

“Yes, sir. Fine.” Gaz mutters. 

Alejandro continues on, using a meter stick to draw an invisible line down a projected image of a warehouse. 

Flash leans back to Gaz’s ear again, feeling malicious. “Is that what you call him in the bedroom? Sir?” 

This time Gaz chokes, coughing wildly as Flash bites back a smile and forces her brows to pinch in concern as she pats his back. 

She does get Ghost's attention this time, but much to her disappointment, yet again, it's just a small shake of his head. Flash glares pointedly back.

“What is going on. Are you sure you’re okay?” Alejandro asks again. 

“I’m going to go grab some water and air, I’ll be right back.” Gaz bites out between coughs. 

Flash lasts another two and a half minutes after he leaves before muttering something about checking on Gaz and wandering out of the room and down the hall. 

It’s here, with fists shoved deep into her pockets that she passes a set of double doors propped open to reveal a small training room. It's modest compared to the one back at their base. The back wall is decorated with an assortment of real and fake weapons and a thick green mat covers the stained cement. A bright red sign nailed to one of the doors threatens suspension to anyone who brings the weapons out of the confinements of the training room. She's about to walk by, wanting to slip out of the building and explore the barn. But her curiosity wins over and she hovers in the dim hallway.

Once Flash is there, watching the fighting pairs, she's surprised it took her so long to hear the grunting and unmistakable thud of bodies bouncing off worn foam. One of the men leaning against the back wall, who'd been intently watching a rather unfair match play out, starts towards her in a slow prowl. The challenge is clear, confidence leaks from him like a poison, and his eyes scan her body, lingering for a few seconds on her chest. She recognizes him from the meeting, but can't quite remember his name. Liam? Larson?

"Get er' Lucas!" One of the guys calls, following with a series of whooping howls. She sends him a withering glare and is about to stalk away to find Gaz when her drifting eyes catch on a brightly colored package peaking from Lucas' pocket. Maybe just one match and then she'd find him.

"What do you say Rubia? Just you and me?" He stops just a few feet from her, close enough that she can smell the sweat that sticks the front of his shirt to his muscled chest.

She has to bite back a laugh at the stuttered way Alejandro's pet name falls from his lips. A far cry from the other man's smoothness. It's not that Lucas isn't attractive, his body is well-shaped and thick dark hair falls into a pair of bright hazel eyes. If she wasn't so busy at the academy she might have even gone for a guy like him. But all she can think of is Ghost's kind eyes and if she's being honest, the shape of his ass in one of the heli harnesses. She doesn't have to see Lucas's backside to know it'll pale in comparison.

"I don't know." Flash looks him up and down, letting the boredom in her eyes shine. "You look a little," she waves one hand around as if it will pull the word from thin air "small."

Lucas flinches back, obviously not used to being rejected. 

"Then it should be quick, no?" His smile is back now, and just as flirty as before.

She relents, “Rules?” She prompts, stretching her shoulders and removing the belt from her waist, doing her best to ignore the pinch as her stitched skin pulls taught.

“Clean fight. First one to tap loses.” 

Flash nods and smiles widely, more than eager to move after sitting for the past five hours. Lucas smiles wide, almost looking feral with a pair of pointed canines.

She follows him to the mat and they square up, him guarding high over his jaw and her standing still, hands at her side. Someone behind them shouts a command and Lucas is lunging, striking hard and fast towards her exposed midsection. She easily sidesteps him, having seen the flex in his exposed calf muscle just a moment before. Childs play. 

Flash lets him lunge, easily dancing around his brutally thrown fists and elbows as he tires himself out. She can already tell he’s used to using his weight as an advantage rather than a tool. Much like every other man she’s fought.

After a particularly poorly timed left hook, Lucas lets out a frustrated growl. Taking pity on him, Flash sighs before darting towards him. In just under two seconds, she’s slipped her leg behind his knees and with one shove of her elbow has him sprawled on the mat, blinking widely. In another second, she’s locked her bicep over his neck and tightened her legs around his chest in a breath-squeezing grip. 

When he doesn’t stop squirming, her bicep tightens around his throat, "Tap." She orders, calm and unwavering. "You've already lost."

Nails scrape at her grip leaving angry red scratches against the back of her hand and wrist. She winces but doesn't relent. His gasping lips have turned pale and the veins at his forehead bulge against sweating skin. If he doesn't tap he'll pass out, she's sure of it. His fingers scratch at her hand again, but this time they’re fumbling and slow. The men surrounding her are shouting at him to fight back and Flash wonders if they're too ignorant to see that the lack of oxygen has left his limbs useless, or if they're just that dumb.

Just as his eyes start to roll back, there's a weak tap against her outer thigh. She immediately releases and Lucas scrambles back against the mat, shoving her to the side in the process, and hunches over, violently coughing between gags.

"What the fuck." He spits out, still curled into himself, red face inches above the dirty mat. "What the fuck is wrong with you."

Pushing herself to her feet, Flash stalks towards him and jabs a finger at his sweating glare. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" She wasn't about to let him make her feel guilty, he'd started it, she just saw it through.

Lucas just stares at her with bloodshot eyes and the room around them stays silent. Nosy Bastards.

"I'll tell you what's wrong with you." She continues, stepping forward to rub the dirty tread of her shoe against the white of his shirt before leaning down, their faces just inches apart. "You're too slow."

He says nothing, even as she reaches over and snatches the cellophane bag of sweets from his pocket.

_____

Happily picking through the bag of candy she’d so fairly won, Flash wanders the property kicking rocks and half-assedly looking for Gaz. Just before she's about to turn and head back, she stumbles upon a smell that she can only describe as animal.

When Flash stops in front of the open barn doors, her jaw drops. One of the biggest horses she’d ever seen stands before her, lazily chewing on a mouthful of hay. She has to crane her head upward to see the ginger mane falling in neat tendrils over a huge, muscled neck. It's as beautiful as it is terrifying.

The horse's nose is soft like plush velvet when she runs a single finger across it, and surprisingly warm. The deep chestnut of its eyes stays relaxed and half-lidded so she strokes it again, this time with her palm. When she does, warm puffs of air blow against her hand and she jumps back, heart racing. The horse seems to sense this and with its long, nimble legs, lowers itself to the ground, nestling into the dry hay bed at her feet. Following it down, Flash drops to her knees and sits back against her heels, feeling braver now that they’re nearly face to face. Well, face to muzzle.

“You aren’t so mean. Huh?” She speaks softly, pressing her palm between the dark, watchful eyes and feeling the warmth of its skin. “Are you a boy or a girl?”

“She’s a girl.”

Flash falls backward, feet slipping from under her in the slick hay when a deep voice calls out from behind her. But large hands are under her arms in seconds, pulling her up and to her feet.

Ghost stands in front of her now, mouth quirked into a small smile under the cotton of his mask. “That’s the second time I’ve had to keep you from knockin’ yourself out.” His hands linger, squeezing her biceps reassuringly before dropping to his sides. “How often does this happen when I’m not around?”

“I- what?” Flash’s heart still beats wildly in her chest, partially from nearly cracking her head off the paved ground, but mostly from the looming presence in front of her. “What?”

“She’s a girl.” Ghost continues, choosing not to repeat his question. “Maple I think. One of Alejandro’s first girls. She’s a sweetheart.” He steps closer to Flash and for a moment she thinks he’s about to grab her, but then he’s reaching past her to rest a hand on the patch of cream-colored fur her own had been resting against just minutes before. Maple's eyes close and she pushes against his hand, moving to nose his palm. Ghost responds by loosening each finger of his glove before pulling it off and tucking it in his waistband. Flash watches intently as he returns his hand to the spot and smooths it upwards, following the patch of cream between her eyes.

“Do you still have that candy?”

Ghost's voice snaps her back and with burning cheeks, she pulls the small plastic bag from her pocket, feeling a pinch of shame at being caught but called out. “How did you know?”

“One of the guys was complaining.” He starts before turning to look at her, his brow furrows slightly at the scratches covering the back of her hand and forearm, but it eases when he glances up at her face. “And your mouth is bright red.”

Handing the bag to him, Flash uses the back of her other hand to wipe at her lips but it’s no use. “Horses can have candy?” She asks, now scrubbing her mouth with the sleeve of her fleece.

Ghost responds by pulling one of the round, brightly colored candies and placing it on the flat of his bare palm before extending it to Maple.

“Some.” He speaks lowly and in a calming tone that Flash knows is for the horse's sake, but she can't help but melt all the same. Maple picks the candy up with the soft skin of her lips before crunching it between a powerful set of teeth. “This stuff is just dyed sugar. They sell it everywhere.”

Then he’s grabbing her hand, flattening her fingers with a gentle swipe before setting a purple one on her palm. It's only when he starts to move her arm towards Maple's giant mouth that she jerks back, closing the candy tight in her palm. It’s sticky and in just a few seconds starts to melt against the heat of her skin.

“Keep your hand flat.” His hand curls around her forearm to grasp her wrist. “I promise she won’t bite. Open.”

At his command, Flash opens her palm and with shaking fingers, lets him guide her arm outwards with his hand wrapped reassuringly around her wrist. At the last moment, Flash shuts her eyes tight, not wanting to see the grisly sight of her fingers being ground to a pulp. But she’s only met with Maple’s warm breath and the tickle of whiskers as her soft lips take the sticky candy from her hand. A nervous laugh bubbles up from her own mouth, a mix of relief and joy at the strange feeling.

“See,” Ghost's voice vibrates from a warm chest, nearly pressed against her back. His hand still grips her wrist, “I told you she wouldn’t bite.”

“I trust you.” Flash says to their hands, “I just don’t trust the horse.”

“Give her another. This time with your eyes open.” She doesn’t ask how he knew her eyes were closed.

With open eyes, Flash lets Ghost set another candy, a bright orange one, onto her palm. Her wrist, still encompassed by his gentle hand, moves on its own accord towards Maple’s brown muzzle. She takes it just as sweetly as before, in a soft kiss of whiskers.

Flash does laugh this time, a sweet laugh that has her falling back a step with the effort, right into Ghost.

When she turns to apologize, still laughing, the words die on her tongue. He stares down at her, eyes wide and burning with so much emotion her breath catches in her throat. His own breath comes shakily through his nose as he brings a hand up to tuck a stray curl behind her ear before dropping it back to his side.

“Do you want to ride her?” He whispers, still staring intently at her face.

“Fuck no.” Flash breathes. But she doesn’t stop him as he pulls a saddle off a post and begins to strap it to a now-standing Maple. She doesn’t stop him when he lifts her like a rag doll and places her in the saddle, or when he gracefully swings himself up to sit behind her. And she doesn’t stop him when he reaches around her to hold the brown leather reins and guide them out and onto a dirt trail. She could have, but she doesn’t.

She’d severely underestimated the proximity that riding a horse with someone requires. Every inch of their bodies molded together, shoulder to shoulder, hip to hip. It’s glorious. She can’t help but settle back a bit, reveling in the way his arms wrap around her shoulders.

The setting sun shines orange and yellow across the tan field, turning it into an ocean of waving ochre honey, and the rest of the green flowing forest into a golden meadow. It seeps into her very bones, dragging her heartbeat to a dull thump that sounds in time with the gentle rocking of Maple's steps. She shifts further back, now laying entirely across Ghost's chest and nestling into the warm spot between his neck and shoulder. It smells delightfully of sweat, oranges, and dirt. He stiffens at first, she doesn’t know if it’s surprise or discomfort, but he relaxes just a moment later, resting his chin gently atop her head. And there, nestled in the warmth of his embrace and lulled by the swaying steps of sweet Maple. Flash closes her eyes and wills her mind to remember every detail, begs her body not to forget the gentle shift of muscle against her back as Ghost directs them down a rough path he seems to know so well.

“You’ve done this before?” Her question is quiet, spoken through a drowsy fog.

Ghost moves the reins to one hand and uses the other to gently knit their fingers together, the way she’d done in his truck. Here in her sleep-drunk state, the effort it takes for him to fit his fingers between her own smaller ones is too comical. “Yes,” His thumb rubs up and down the ridges of her knuckles, no doubt soothing his own nerves, “I’ve spent a lot of time here. Alejandro has done a lot for me.”

“With the horses?”

“Well,” he starts, hesitatingly, “A few years ago, I was having a rough time. Things were not going my way.” A large breath presses his chest tightly against her back “Alejandro let me stay with him for as long as I needed.”

“So you became a cowboy?” She teases, squeezing his hand tight.

“Not right away,” he laughs lightly and Flash involuntarily presses back into the sound, “I was scared shitless. Alejandro had to practically force me into the barn. But then I learned more about them. How compassionate and loving they are. Did you know they can have a whole conversation with just their ears?”

Flash hums encouragingly, hoping he’ll keep talking, if only to feel his voice against her back.

“They can love too. They’ll bond to someone, and love them the same way a human would. Real love.” An eager note shifts his voice, something Flash had never heard before.

“And did you bond with Maple?” Flash speaks into the soft cotton of his jacket.

“No,” a sigh tickles the soft hair at her nape “though we did get close. I have another horse. Her name is Rose.”

“Pretty name.” Flash hums “Where is she?”

Ghost stiffens again, and this time it takes him a few more beats to settle back and even longer to respond.

“She’s being cared for by my neighbor.”

“What’s she look like?” Flash’s voice is drifting, and the lids of her eyes seem impossibly heavy. She starts to imagine his home. A cupboard filled with chipped mugs and a wooden drying rack next to a deep basin sink. She’s decided that he’s not one to use a dishwasher.

“Golden hair,” his hand reaches up to tug at a strand of her own and she bats a hand at him, completely missing through her half-lidded gaze. “Blue eyes.” He’s brushing his hand along her cheekbone now and the feeling is like a magnet, tugging her eyes closed with a final drag down the bridge of her nose. “And a fiery temperament.”

“Are you calling me a horse?” Flash mumbles, half incoherent. But Ghost manages to decipher it and laughs breathily.

“No, I’m just noticing some similarities.” His hand reaches up to smooth the hair at her temple. Its awfully delightful.

“You keep doing that I’m going to fall asleep.” She threatens, even though they both know she’s far past salvation.

“That’s okay.” His hand drops to wrap around her waist, pulling her impossibly closer. “I won’t let you fall.”

“Okay.”

And for the first time since the incident, Flash falls asleep without the anxiety of what she’ll miss, what will pull her from her sheets, screaming and clawing. For the first time in weeks, she falls asleep in the sweet embrace of safety.

A/N: You cannot tell me that Flash isn't an ass woman. She's going to be grabbing handfuls soon. 

Also the idea of Ghost hyper fixating on horses AUGGHH HES TOO GOOD FOR THIS WORLD

Anywaysss, thank you for sticking with me through all of this. I love all of you and will talk to you again very soon!

[mixed-theater-faisty-tings]

Infinitely Jealous

Conrad Request

A/N:HIII!!! I KNOW I HAVEN'T POSTED IN AGES I'VE REALLY MISSED IT. WITH THE NEW SEASON OF THE SUMMER I TURNED PRETTY I FELT A SMALL SPARK OF INSPIRATION AND GOT THIS REQUEST FROM @shqtteredcrystql1. NOW BEAR WITH ME MY WRITING SKILLS HAVE DETERIORATED A BIT SINCE I LAST POSTED AND I'M STILL WORKING ON MY SMUT WRITING SPOILER ALERT. I AM OPEN TO FEEDBACK OR EVEN ADVICE. I AM TYRING TO WRITE MORE WHEN I CAN I JSUT NEVER WANNA GIVE HALF BAKED IDEAS. OKAY I WILL STOP BABBLING ENJOY!

P.S please don't hurt me for using Conrad and Belly's infinity for this I just love the concept. okay thank you.

Warnings: Explicit language, smut, cheesy lol, Teen Drinking, Protected sex.

word count: 3.2k roughly

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Masterlist

Requests

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Y/N POV 

The stench of alcohol fills my nose as drunken teenagers dance the night away with whatever is in their system. I came to this stupid beach party with Conrad and Jeremiah who both ran off to do god knows what not that this was a new occurrence.

Jere has always attracted girls like moths to light meanwhile Conrad ventures off to do whatever he does and if someone happens to join them he won't push them off so long as they don't try to actually get to know him least that is how he has been the last few summers. 

They started bringing me here with them 7 years ago when we met. I've always been closer with Conrad. Jeremiah had Belly and Conrad had me though you never want to go to boardwalk with the four of us unless you're wanting some quality entertainment.

The Fisher boys always know how to have fun the Conklin's and I can never say no even if it means coming to a dumb beach bonfire. I'd go anywhere with Conrad it's been that way since we met this includes an impromptu trip to the other side of the country to attend a Universal Studios Horrors night as my birthday present. 

We were grounded for 2 months after that one but it was worth any time with him was. He'll only ever see me as his best friend though he has made that crystal clear he's been in touch with this Deb he met last summer "Nicole", they've just been talking but it seems like they could be more this summer or just a casual summer fling of convenience. Maybe this summer I'll find my fling.

"Hey don't think I've ever seen you around here?", a voice pulls me out of my thoughts. "Huh?",  I connect with brown eyes belonging to someone tall, dark skinned, curly dark hair and muscular. "I said I've never seen you around here.", he repeats himself. "Funny because I've come here every summer for the last 7 years." a laugh decorates my words with a hint of sarcasm.

"Oh yeah?  Which house is yours?", he plays along. "First of all creepy and second I'm a guest with the Fisher's.", I giggle. "Ah great guys always fun at a party." his attitude changes from interested to standoffish. "We are just friends all of us.", I smile kindly. "Good to know..care for a drink?", he extends his hand to me with a kind smile. 

"Sure why not.", I take his hand. "I'm Lucas.". "Y/N.". "And I'm Conrad glad we got the introductions out of the way now let's get beer.", my best friend pops up out of nowhere. "Uh okay sure I'll be right back.", Lucas runs off wearing a confused expression. "What are you doing?", I hiss at the brown-haired boy. 

"Hanging with my best bud what do you mean.", he slings his arm around my shoulder with a smirk planted on his lips...his lips..focus. "No why you're doing is ruining a potential new friend.", a stern tone clutches onto my words. "Friend huh? Yeah sure whatever.", he scoffs. "Go makeup with Red Sox girl some more.", I roll my eyes pushing his arm off of me. I knew it was Nicole but saying her name out loud stung.

"Jealous?", I don't have to look at him to know a sly look sits on his face. "As if. Have I ever been jealous of the girls you've dated?", my arms sit crossed just beneath my chest. "I'm sure you have been.". "Check your ego bro.", I turn to walk away when he says, "I have you to keep me humble don't I?", a chuckle follows. 

"Whatever I'll see you later.", the sand envelops my feet treading to find Lucas. "Y/N over here!", a voice calls me over belonging to Lucas over by the fire. "Your bodyguard still with you?", he asks when I finally make it over to him. "Funny uh no I gave him the night off.", I smile. "Good to know.", he playfully bumps my shoulder handing me a beer can unopened. 

"So do you come here just for summer or do you experience Cousins in all four seasons?", I ask. He takes a seat in the sand waiting for me to join him before answering. "I actually go to boarding school so I experience a little bit of all four seasons on holiday assuming I don't run off to Mexico for Christmas or spring break.", he laughs. "You don't seem the other spoiled boarding school brats we run into here.", confusion swirls in my head. 

"I mean would you prefer for me to? Ugh my parents shipping me off to some lame ass boarding school with their credit card knowing I have a trust fund to carry me for the rest of my life even though I'll probably blow it on some stupid shit as soon as I'm 25.", his tone becomes snarky, and attitude narcissistic quickly replaced by the charming side once more. 

"Entertaining I will say but not my vibe.", a laugh escapes my lips. "Good cause that's not who I am.", he chuckles joins the air. We spend the time talking soon leaving the fire to walk along the beach taking about just how different our lives are. He was good company, but I kept thinking about Conrad and what he was doing, who he was with, why he wasn't with me. 

Yes, I know I basically told him fuck off but it's not like he ever listens he's my best friend and he knows y/n speak by now. Conrad maybe smart enough to get into Brown but sometimes he needs a little push in the right direction. "Y/N are you listening?", Lucas jumps in front of me. My face drops into a frown feeling bad i hadn’t been pay attention.

"Y/N quick it's Conrad!", Steven yells. My feet carry me as fast as they can without getting caught in the sand back to the group of teens surrounding a fight with none other than my stupid best friend in the middle of it.

"Con! Quit being stupid!", I push my way through the crowd and try to pull him off the random dude. My attempt was moot until Jere finally stepped in and broke up the fight around the same time as sirens began sounding. 

"Cops!". The teens that once covered the beach dropped their drinks and scattered like cockroaches. "Y/N let's go grab some ice cream and I'll take you home.", Lucas grabs ahold of my hand gently tugging me away from the guys.

"Like hell you will.", Conrad pulls me towards him. "You don't own her man. She can come with me if she wants to.", the alluring guy I was talking to all night disappears taken over with frustration and anger.

"We brought her, we will take her home besides she just met you like I'd ever let her endanger herself like that. Besides your place isn’t her home. Mine is.”the brown hair boy mocks the curly haired boys statement. "I never said anything about my place quit putting words in my mouth".

 "Would both of you just shut up!.", my outburst took both of them aback. "Lucas I'll see you around. Conrad let's get your stupid ass home.", annoyance prominent in my voice as I drag them away from each other. "Give me the keys Conrad.", I hold out my hand. "Not a chance.", he pushes past me and gets in the drivers side of his sedan. 

"I can't fucking believe you.", his tone accusatory. "Believe me about what?". "That boarding school trust fund fuck boys are your type.", his hands grip the wheel tighter than normal meanwhile I completely lose it.

"And how the fuck would you know what my type is huh! You have never cared nor taken an interest in the guys I have talked to. God acting like my dad I don't need your protection okay I can take care of myself.", I can feel my cheeks turning hot with anger. 

"You are so wrapped up in your own world you don't even notice that I do care about who you are with. You deserve more than that jackass.", tension settles in the air, suddenly this car feels like a tiny box."All that guy wanted to do was hook up with you.",his voice was filled with a know it all tone.

"So what if that is what I wanted!", he is surprised by my response. "You don't wanna lose it to some random one night stand.". "And if I do?", I didn't but he didn't need to know that.

"I know you Y/N you want to lose it to someone you care about and you know cares about you.", his grips loosens. "Maybe it's just not meant for me.", I can't let my guard down. 

My eyes follow his hand as it leaves the wheel and lays flat against the skin between my thigh and knee. "Don't say that.", we finally pull into the driveway of the beach house quietly making our way in the house careful not to wake Laurel or Susannah. I make my way to the kitchen grabbing some powdered donuts from the pantry. 

"I wasn't trying to upset you..honestly. You're my best friend and I never want to hurt you but lately I just keep fucking up.", he follows me after Jere, Belly and Steven trot upstairs to their rooms. "It's fine Connie you were right I don't wanna lose my virginity to some dude I met on the beach at a lame party.", I avoid looking at him. 

"I wouldn't want that for you either.", a gentle tone takes over his voice. "You're not fucking up anything by the way I mean I'm still here aren't I?", I attempt to lighten the mood. "Surprisingly so.", he chuckles. "What's going on in that brilliant head of yours?", I finally bathe the strength to look at him without melting. 

The way the front pieces of his hair kind of flop in front of his eyes, he's constantly pushing them behind his ear mainly when he's nervous but he also refuses to cut it Susannah loves it. His brown eyes seep into mine without even trying encapsulating me in a daydream. 

"You...me...y/n you think I don't care who you date but I do.", a nervous Conrad is not something I don't see often or ever really. "Let's not have this conversation again please.", I beg. "I have feelings for you.", he blurts not looking me in the eye. "What?", I'm taken aback praying he said what I heard.

"I like you Y/N and I have since we met I'm just so screwed up and I didn't wanna drag you down with me especially with my mom. You're the only other person besides me who knows about my parents and they don't even know that I know.", the sound of the stool screeching against the floor as he stands up out of the chair echos string us both. 

"Con you're not screwed up..", I gently take his hands in mine connecting our eyes. "You just need to develop better communication skills.". "How's this for practice?", his body leans over mine slowly coming down to bring his lips to mine. 

Is this really happening? Am I about to kiss Conrad Fisher, I've only ever dreamed of this moment never anticipating the reality god don't let me mess this up please. The soft skin of his lips gently connect with him, his hands disconnecting from mine caressing my cheeks instead leaving my hand to go to his shoulders pulling him closer afraid to lose the moment. 

I've always felt safe around him but, here in this moment it was cloud nine times a million. I didn't want it to end but we had to breathe eventually. "So?". 

"Well ahem.. a kiss isn't communicating however you can take that as an I feel the same way..", I anxiously pull my bottom lip between my teeth. "I love how you do that when you're nervous.", a nervous laugh escapes his lips. "We should head up to bed it's getting late.", as much as I don't want to I pull away from his body, his warmth knowing he'll be different in the morning. 

"Stay with me tonight.", it comes off as a statement rather than a question making my heart jump with excitement. "Your mom would flip if she caught us in your room.", I raise a brow. "Not if she doesn't find out or I come up with a really good excuse as to why you were in my room, and my bed.", he keeps me close.

"I don't know Con.". "Please.". "Okay fine.". 

Pleased with my appliance to his wishes he leads us upstairs to his room carefully closing the door. After removing our shoes we lay in his bed facing each other, the light of the moon casting a light so bright I could see his whole face in the dark.

The soft touch of his hands push some hair behind my ear before pulling me into our second kiss of the evening. 

Without thinking I immediately kiss him back, our bodies manage to close any gap left between us in a matter of seconds the moment enclosing us in a world of our own. I pull back slightly we are still nose to nose but rarely any space is between us. 

With as much confidence as I could muster I whisper the words I've wanted to say for months, "I want it to be you.". He is slightly surprised by my statement but doesn't break our contact, a small smile daring to turn up the corner of his mouth. "Are you sure? That wasn't what I was trying to do not now.", the words are soft spoken. 

"I'm sure unless you don't want to?", my eyes search his for an ounce of rejection. "Believe me I want to I just don't want you to feel rushed or pressured.". Without another word my hand takes a hold of his guiding it from the softness of my legs up to rest on my hips slowly and ever so gently. "Please Connie." with that I connect our lips once more. 

He takes this as his green light deepening the kiss turning me onto my back so he can be onto careful not to crush me under him. My fingers dance under his shirt against his stomach and chest, he smiles into the kiss before moving to my neck tenderly nipping at the skin a gasp escaping my lips. 

"We have to be quiet baby.", he whispers into my ear sending shivers down my spine in the best way possible. We both sit up swiftly removing our shirts, he gently pecks my lips allowing himself to kiss down my jawline, neck and along my shoulders till his hands reach the clasp of my bra. 

"May I?", his breathe tickles my neck and I nod. The white lace is soon gone leaving my top half completely bare and exposed, to my own surprise I'm not as nervous as I'd thought I'd be but how can I be when it's him.

He begins to kiss from my shoulder back down my chest gently laying me back down before reaching my jeans. I can feel his fingers undo the button and zipper tugging the denim off my hips and down my legs. 

A cold breeze hit my sensitiveness causing me to shudder. One step further and my panties have fond the rest of the clothes on my the floor. His eyes meet mine again a smile plastered on his face before speaking in a hushed tone. "Okay I'm gonna be honest it does hurt the first time but I promise I'm gonna do everything I can to make sure that you are ready before then. Do you trust me baby?". 

"Of course I do.", I smile. 

Our lips attach themselves once more as his thumb begins to rub my bud an action responsible for my hips bucking up. "It's okay.Relax", he reassures me against my lips.

My mind goes foggy overcome by his touch, of course I've touch myself but his hands against my most sensitive part was a whole new feeling of pleasure I've had yet to explore. 

When he feels I'm ready he slides a finger inside pumping in and out slowly, our moans mix together in the air trying to remain quiet. "I'm going to add another okay?". "Okay.". I feel his index and and middle fingers sliding in and out of me a wave of pleasure washing over me. I kiss him to try and cover my moans a futile action as I end up moaning against his lips instead. 

"Fuck yes just like that.", my hips begin to grind against his fingers giving him confidence to speed up slightly. My stomach begins to tighten as my climax winds up, he plants soft kisses along my chest continuing his motions only heightening my moans. "You are so beautiful y/n.", his whisper causes butterflies to let loose in my stomach. 

"I think I'm ready Connie.", I couldn't hold back anymore. I wanted him, all of him more than anything in this moment. "I think so too.", all contact is taken away so he could remove his jeans but I can't help the whimper that leaves my lips at the loss. 

The moment stand still our eyes locked on one another taking in this sight of each others exposed state, emotionally and physically bare. I prayed he couldn't hear how loud my heart was beating I've wanted him for so long to be more than my best friend and here he is, here I am giving him my first an I wouldn't change a thing. 

"Do you have protection?", I ask. He nods before reaching into his drawer and pulling out a shiny gold foil, putting on the condom and hovering over me once more. "I want you to be mine.", the words fall graciously from his now swollen lips. "I am yours.", I'm quick to answer.

"No I mean I want us, you and me. Boyfriend and girlfriend. This isn't just a one time thing. Be mine? Please.", a vulnerable Conrad is a side we rarely see and only in his most emotional state thought I've always been his soft spot. "I've always been yours whether you knew it or not my love.", I don't blush at the statement instead I smile and plant a small kiss on his nose. 

"This may still hurt I'm gonna go slow and let me know when I can move okay?", his lips lower to mine. His tip rubbing against my clit earning a small moan. "Okay.", I force the one worded answer out. As he kisses me slowly his member enters me...holy shit...a stint of pain swells inside my body, "Please move Con.", I manage. 

The thrusts replace pain with bliss, his minty scent fills my olfactory nerves, the soft touch of his lips and hands dance along my skin with sweat glistening on us both.

"Fuck you feel good baby.", he's as breathless as I am. His hands grip my hips imprinting small marks on them while my nails dig into his shoulders and back my entire body buried in ecstasy. 

"More.", I beg. I can feel him smirk into my neck picking up his pace and pushing deeper into me causing my back to arch off the bed our chests colliding. "Oh god." I moan gripping his shoulders so tight my knuckles are white.

"You're okay we're almost there.",his words soothe me and I allow myself to fall back against the mattress. As if they have a mind of their own my hips being to move meeting his hurts with equal enthusiasm and energy. "Just like that.", he groans into my skin. 

The knot in my stomach grows and grows I'm toe curling close to my end as is he. His speed picks up, ours moans mix praying we don't wake anyone. Mass amounts of Conrads groans fill the air when I begin to clench around him neither of us could hold on any longer.

 A white haze clouds all my senses as my entire body shakes with my orgasm. I feel him finish with me both of us panting and completely gone for each other and the moment we just shared.

A few minutes pass allowing us to collect ourselves before he quickly jumps grabbing an old t-shirt to clean us up. His care is gently and appreciated as some soreness begins to settle between my legs. 

"So how was I?', my cheeks turn red as I ask. I grab his shirt off the floor and pull it over my head covering myself.  "Perfect.", his arms wrap around my body spooning me, comforting me in a way I've never known a person could.

"Thank you for being my first.", the words are spoken just above a whisper. "Just hope you don't regret it.", his body tenses nervously against my back a sadness coating his words. "I could never regret you Conrad not about this, and not about us...we're infinite.". 

"Infinite.". he repests. "I should probably go to mine and Belly's room before anyone gets suspicious.", I try to get up only to be pulled back by Conrad. "You aren't going anywhere. I told you I will find a great excuse as to why you were in here.", I giggle at his statement.

"And what about the clothes that covering the floor?", I cock an eyebrow at him. "I've been meaning to do laundry.", he answers. 

"That includes my panties?", I can't help but laugh. "They got mixed up?", he shrugs. "My boyfriend ladies and gentlemen the best liar.", we both erupt in a fit of laughter though it is short lived as my eyelids begin to droop closed.

"Goodnight Connie.", my whole body relaxes into his chest sleep taking over. 

"Goodnight my infinity.", him kissing my head is the last thing I remember before being swept away in sleep. 

Infinity.  

[saltydoesstuff]

Rottmnt OC Time

I legit spent 7 hours straight hunched over on my bed doing this- my spine feels like a pez dispenser

But here she is! Welcome Alex to the game! (I know my handwriting is kinda hard to read so I'll translate down below-) - Alex was caught during a school field trip her senior year of highschool- an oozequito stung her while she was near the snow leopard enclosure. - In a panic, she had tried to run home. Her parents freaked when they saw her however, and basically kicked her out. She was left out on the streets for multiple days before Hypno and Warren found her huddling in an alley way. - They happily took Alex in to live with them, they knew what it was like to be rejected by their past too- and had sympathy for her situation (they may be villians, but they aren't heartless. Imagine doof levels of evil from these two) - She's been living with the couple ever since, Hypno and Warren have become like uncles to her at this point - Sometimes she will join in on their "evil escapades", her new abilities allow her to be quite the little thief - Due to the thickness of her fur however, she is more vulnerable to the heat- she wears little/loose clothing to try and combat the threat of heat exhaustion or fainting - Her relationship with the turtles are neutral so far, they have yet to actually spot/meet her - Yet she knows of their existence, her uncles rant about the turtles often and she's seen them battle her uncles on more than one occasion while she's getting away with her share of the stolen goods - She's yet to be caught, making her the ultimate get away :) - Her share of the stolen items help them pay for the apartment as well -Alex is actually a very chill person, she isn't really on one side or the other. She likes to stay neutral, but will help either side when she feels like she can Alex's abilities rely heavily on stealth, as snow leopards are nicknamed the "ghosts of the mountain"- Think kitty soft paws. With her claws sheathed she is deathly silent while sneaking about- she is very agile and flexible as a feline would, and her tail helps her greatly with balance (she can even use it to hang from things!). She can withstand staggering cold weather and handle being up high where there is low oxygen. And of course she can see very well in the dark. Her hearing and smell has increased ten fold- and she is affected by things like cat nip, laser pointers or anything that would trigger her to go full on cat. She is also capable of purring and other cat like noises- though like the animal she takes after she can't roar, but instead yowls. Alex takes very good care of her fur, even if it is a nightmare to wash and get wet- shits soft as silk, and her paws are the ultimate squishy toy. Just be careful of the claws. She has a variety of heart markings littered around her body; her cheeks, belly, the backs of her hands and tail are the more noticeable places to find these markings-- her uncles tease her endlessly about them. And that's all I got for now on the gal- I may write more about her and the turtle's relationship whenever I get around to it but I feel like this is good introduction of her so far-- It's nearly 5 am and I haven't slept so I'mma go pass out now

[icefell]

My activity isn't going to be as frequent after the long weekend. I'm back to work and it is very draining so ....replies will most likely come on the weekends!

....side note. I haven't been stung by a bee since I was 7 .....I understand why I screamed and cried.... those mfers don't hold back.

[museqmeg]

[20 Question Fic Writer Game]

Tagged by @faindri! Hello~ Roan!!

How many works do you have on AO3?

7, that's 6 more than I was ever planning to do.

What is your AO3 word count?

88,757

What fandoms do you write for?

Currenlty: Trigun

Previously: Final Fantasy IX wayyy back in the day. I never published to fanfiction.net (AO3 wasn't around yet) but I stored my fics on the shared family computer that only had dial-up internet. Risky business.

What are your top five fics by kudos?

Reporter's Notes

Sheets

Snapshots

Tomaship

Aquamarine

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I like to interact with my readers and let them know how much I appreciate them taking the time to read my fics and leave a comment and kudos.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Eternal Oblivion... it's sad sad.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The Reporter's Notes Series/Sheets. I was gonna leave it angsty, but @chaoticbuka didn't think it was fair that Vash got a semi-happy ending and Meryl didn't. Long story short, and 8k words later, they both got their happy ending. *wink wink*

Do you get hate on fics?

I got a couple messages that shipping Vash & Meryl was problematic because of their height difference. That really stung because I am petite like Meryl and share the same 15-inch height difference Vash and Meryl do with my own husband. Let it be known that grown adults are still adults. Please don't infantilize petite people.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes... I'm not sure what kind? I use more vague descriptors for the sexual acts. Nothing raunchily explicit.

Do you write crossovers?

No

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so?

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! One of my readers translated Reporter's Notes into Spanish.

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I haven't, but it sounds fun!

What's your all-time favourite ship?

Vash & Meryl. I adore how they love and see myself and my husband in them. I feel really connected to the pair.

What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will?

Everything is complete at the moment!

What are your writing strengths?

I've been told I'm good at dialogue, characterization, and world-building.

What are your writing weaknesses?

General setting descriptors. I don't spend a lot of time writing paragraphs to create the atmosphere. I could probably do that a little more.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done it! I was a music major in college and had to take a few language courses since music is written in multiple languages. I also grew up in a Dutch immigrant household, so I picked up a few things. I know a little Dutch, Spanish, French, Italian, and Norwegian. I'm using Duolingo at the moment to learn some Japanese.

First fandom you wrote for?

Final Fantasy IX - I love you Zidane & Dagger.

Favourite fic you've ever written?

Is it a bullshit answer if I say my entire Reporter's Notes series? If I had to pick a favorite chapter... probably "Reins." My horse girl heart.

Tagging: @chaoticbuka @revenantghost @dingusttmax

But only if you want to!

[insipid-drivel]

Please wear your damned sun screen. I'm echoing OP's calls for summer outdoor safety here, and hope they won't be offended if I expand a bit on who's even more vulnerable to UV radiation, how it works, and also give a general breakdown of what radiation even is, since younger folks these days haven't even heard of shit like Chernobyl or Three Mile Island, PA (aka: ALMOST FUCKING CHERNOBYL BUT ON THE EAST COAST OF THE US), and so don't really understand how dangerous many different kinds of radiation are.

I'm gonna start with a personal anecdote that is 100% true, and seriously bitch-slapped me into being way, way more careful about extreme heat and sun exposure.

I lived for over a year in Sydney, Australia. A lot of you younger users may not have been taught about this, but up until VERY recently, one of our biggest Climate Change concerns that was actively fucking up the environment was called The Hole In The Ozone Layer. We called it that, because that's what it fucking was. A gigantic hole caused by garbage polluting the air like propellants, methane, and other crap from aerosol cans of hairspray and air fresheners and when it was cool that Times Square had a motorized Marlboro Man billboard that actually smoked real smoke out of its mouth 24/7 for decades.

Our planet is protected from our sun's radiation courtesy of multiple invisible layers in our sky: Ozone (an inorganic gas created by the UV rays from the sun colliding with electricity in our atmosphere's ions), Atmosphere, Stratosphere, and Ionosphere. The Atmosphere, Stratosphere, and Ionosphere are the big "OOOF" moments you see in movies featuring space flight take off from Earth or a similar planet. Those 3 layers alone are so protective to our planet that it's the reason it's so hard to travel to and from space safely: a space ship or rocket has to be able to stand up to the same levels of abuse as a meteor that doesn't break apart. THAT is how much protection our planet provides us from the vacuum of space and the barrages of radiation that come from the sun, as well as our natural magnetic field, AND THE OZONE LAYER. If even one of those layers fails somehow? Earth automatically becomes only hospitable to extremophile microorganisms like water bears, because the giant hole in the ozone layer alone going away literally causes you to feel the sun's radiation burning you alive.

This is where my stint in Sydney comes in. As some of my longer-term followers and mutuals may remember, I was part of a webcomic duo ("Two Kings" discontinued, "Galdranorn and the Fury" completed) where I wrote and my former partner did the painting and illustrating. I lived with him and his roommate for work and to support him while he struggled through getting approval for his gender-affirming HRT and surgeries. He never paid me a dime from what our supporters donated and subscribed for and spent it all on opioids (which he used me and our roommate to acquire, too) while banning me from writing with anyone but him. He sucked, but I still found things about Australia to both love, and fear.

The thing about Sydney is that... the hole in the Ozone Layer is still there. After several generations, we humans have done an amazing job of correcting our aerosol usage with regards to ozone, and over the past number of decades, the hole has been closing up again and "healing". The only major spot where large populations of humans live happens to be over Australia.

The sun hurts in Australia. I've been around the world in the Northern Hemisphere, but never once did I step out of the airport, into a beam of sunlight, and instantly recoil from pain. I honestly first thought a bug had stung me, but it was the fucking SUNLIGHT.

It was later explained to me that, due to the lack of ozone over Sydney, you are LEGALLY REQUIRED to wear sunscreen and a brimmed hat in summer if you go outside, even when it's cloudy and overcast, because the UV radiation in summer in Australia can be so intense that you will get sunburns on a cloudy day. Parents who refuse to properly sunscreen and dress their kids before letting them go out to play or go to school are brought up on child negligence charges and fined heavily.

That is how seriously they take UV radiation in Australia. Ozone is literally what makes our sky blue (along with refraction from the sun's rays off our oceans and seas), and is an inorganic molecule that's generated by the sun's UV radiation (or any UV radiation source) acting upon the electrical activity in the ions in our planet's atmosphere. While very, very tiny amounts of ozone in a limited space can kill most organic life, dense amounts of ozone higher up in our atmosphere literally forms a shield against the sun's UV rays contacting your face or bare buttcrack. You may have actually smelled ozone before if you've ever been in the vicinity of a lightning strike or thunderstorm; it smells chemical-y, and almost like chlorine.

While I lived in Sydney, my lily-white, Northern-Hemisphere-heralding ass would start to burn within minutes of going outside without sunscreen or protective clothing on. I could literally feel my skin cooking with every passing minute I spent in direct sunlight, and the radiation itself caused me to develop severe heat rashes that required medical attention. The UV rays and heat was so bad my joints would swell up to the point I couldn't bend my thumbs, and the pores on my hands and arms became blocked and infected from the sheer amount of sweating I was doing as I was being burned. I would only get better inside, in air conditioning, and soaking my hands and arms in cool water.

When I went to the doctor about my weird rashes and joint inflammation, she picked up on my distinct American accent, and had to explain to me that I was likely experiencing mild radiation burns. They weren't just burns from heat and friction. The sun was poisoning me. She gave me some medication to treat the burning and inflammation, and warned me to never, ever set foot outdoors without sunblock of at least SPF40 or protective clothing again. Especially because I have a lot of moles and beauty marks.

See, the shitty thing about cancer is that it's so lethal while being so infuriatingly, stupidly simple in its logic as a disease. One day, cells can just decide to make more cells. I was seriously taken aback when my doctor in Sydney pointed out my moles, which are legitimately everywhere (I literally have fully-formed constellations on my body; Orion's Belt is on my left forearm). Moles are already abnormal deposits of melanin and tissue, and so they can be especially vulnerable to going rogue and turning cancerous under UV radiation. Back then, when I thought of melanoma, I just imagined a person tanning enough that they woke up with a weird mole - not that an existing one could become dangerous under UV radiation.

Radiation in general is really terrible for organic life - not just humans. For us, when we're exposed to known cancer-causing radiation, our bodies respond to the presence of the radioactive energy and treat radiation like it's free calcium, and enthusiastically absorbs it into your body with no understanding that it is highly dangerous. Radiation most often accrues in bone first, and that's why it can take years sometimes for cancers to manifest, with blood, bone, and metabolic cancers being some of the most common. Modern medicine actually has a limit for how much radiation of any kind a human being can be exposed to within a year before they'll experience radiation poisoning and/or develop cancers, which is why doctors nowadays are so sparing and very "get everything looked at and tested for at once": Too many medical scans in a single year can give people cancers.

Now, think about that. How many times a year do you go in for an X-Ray? Maybe a few times in your entire life, if you're lucky?

Now imagine you willingly stepped into X-Rays on a daily basis, and when the imaging technician offers you a lead apron (lead being one of the very few elements that effectively insulates against radiation), you chose to take more clothing OFF. You're spending hours getting x-rayed. Your imaging techs are very confused, but they really, really want you to put the lead apron on.

Would you think someone behaving like that was being stupid and reckless with their health? Bathing in radiation for fun, every day, for hours?

That's what a lot of Australians think about Americans, and are not shy to tell you about that if you mention it.

That's you and sunscreen. The sun is the X-Ray machine, the UV is the radiation itself, and the sunscreen is your anti-cancer lotion, and your doctor handling your cancer is thinking like an Australian: "Why didn't you just wear the apron?"

Please wear sunscreen. As a 90's kid, I went through the Ozone Crisis, Y2K, Bill Clinton, and Woodstock 19motherfucking99 so you wouldn't have to. Let not mine kinfolks' sufferings have been in vain, O young ones.

Hello everybody with summer fast approaching here is your regular reminder that:

Everyone needs to wear sunscreen

SPF 50 is pretty much the best protection you can get, an SPF higher than that will have the same effect

Melanin does not protect you from skin cancer

Tanning is caused by exposure to ultraviolet radiation

Spending the majority of your life receiving regular large doses of UV radiation without any skin protection is a good way to get skin cancer

Don't use tanning beds, and don't go sun tanning

Wear your fucking sunscreen

[chameleon-madrigal]

XXII | Cuentos de Camilo

(Stories of Camilo)

Title: The Proposal

Genre: Fluff

Pairings: Camilo x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Aged up, Modern AU (No Powers)

Summary: They say “Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.” And Camilo waited all these years just to propose and asked you to be his wife.

He/him pronouns for Camilo

She/her pronouns for Reader

Note: This has been in my drafts for ages so I decided to finish and I hope you love it! For those who I haven't posted their requests dont worry im still working on it, sorry im currentlt having a writer's block but I hope you like this on, enjoy <33

MASTERLISTER HERE!

Camilo's POV

It has been 7 years when me and Y/N started dating. Being in a relationship is not that easy nor hard, it takes patience and time. I thought I know Y/N really well when I liked her, but when she became my girlfriend I got to know her very well. I can now tell what she likes and what she doesn't. Her moods? I had already settled with that, afterall Papa raised me well, especially when she has mood swings from her monthly period. But I still love her anyways.

Being together with her for how many years now, got me into a decision and choice that will have our life better. I'm going to propose to her. And with a precious princesa comes with a precious surprise. When I mean surprise it really should have put a lot of effort, Y/N is really fond of surprises, like REALLY!

My plan is to set up the house to an amazing place where the magic would happen. But yeah just gonna make this place so special for her. I already asked my primas and hermana to help me and gladly they helped me without me treating them in return. Both of our families already knew about this, the only thing left is just to set up the place.

"Camilo are the photos ready?" Isabela asked me once she entered my room while constantly leaving flower petals, that is from her hand, everywhere. I had a lot of our pictures that we will hang for later in the set up.

"Sí, Isa almost done in-" I didn't finish my sentence when she suddenly smack my head. Oww that hurts!?

"HEY!? WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!?" I said and she just rolled her eyes at me.

"You almost stepped into my cactuses!" She said and I just looked at him with an 'are-you-serious-look'

"Okayy, fine I'll be careful. Since your cactus are more important than your primo being stung by it" I said and glared at her while she is just chuckling as she just messed with my hair.

"Stop being so dramatic" She said and continued putting flowers and designs everywhere to make the place more pretty.

If I really don't owe something to Isabela, I swear I would have teased her about her plants and stuffs.

After I have arrange the photos, Isabela went downstairs and hang those in the garden. And now I need to make sure that all of my presents are still here. The presents were just a big human size chameleon stuffed toy (which I think maybe this is a lot bigger than her and ofcourse chameleon coz it represents me), a boquet of blue and pink flowers (she loves that color thats why), I also have a box that has a yellow bracelet with a butterfly pendant and a necklace that goes with a heart pendant. And most importantly chocolates! With the very very most important is the letter or poem that I made for her. And THE RING OFCOURSE. I hope she will love this stuffs.

Okay, so this is the very amazing plan that was made up by yours truly. First, I will invite her to come to the house to have some movie night and at the middle of the movie I will excuse myself and go to the garden at that time my own video will show up, so yeah I edited it to put in into the movie. After the video, ofcourse she will find me. While on her way to the garden, rose petals are scattered to the floor making her follow it to the garden. Once she arrived there (ofcourse I'm still hiding) she will notice the beautiful lights that is hanging on the garden, with our pictures in it. And some notes that has messages on it. After that I will come out with all those stuffs. And then EASYYY- I WILL PROPOSE.

I went downstairs to see how the place is getting ready.

"Woahh, this place is so nicee" I said with a smile on my face as soon as I saw the garden. I taste a little of the foods that Tía Julieta made and I almost finished it but Mirabel stopped me.

"Tía these foods are the best!" I said and while snapping my hands.

"Ofcourse it was made by my Mama and if you don't stop, I swear there would be nothing left" Mirabel said and put me away to the kitchen

I just muttered and stuck out my tongue to her and helped Isabela and Dolores scatter the rose petals from the ground.

Once we are finished, I told them to just stay here and do whatever they want but just be quiet, as her family are also here. I texted Y/N to come over here, luckily its just easy for her to say yes.

"Ahh look at you, Cariño. All grown up" My Mamí said and hugged me tight as she started to be emotional.

"Pepi, amor. You're gonna ruin his look. You are making your papa proud, Camilo" Mi papa said and did a thumbs up as I smiled.

"YOu ArE mAkInG yOuR PapA pRoUd" I immitate him trying to ease the serious tension as he just look at me in disbelief.

"I don't sound like that"

"i DoN'T SOuNd LIkE THAt" I said and he was about to smack me when Dolores interrupted.

"I think we should get going"

"We'll be waiting outside" Mamí said as they went to the garden.

Dolores just hugged me and nudged me without a warning as I gave her a confusing look but later on, change into a fond smile.

"Goodluck, hermanito" She said as Mariano gave me a thumbs up.

Antonio hugged me also before going outside as he gave me his chameleon stuffed animal.

"For the nerves" He said and I just chuckled.

Tía Julieta and Tío Agustin also gave me a goodluck before they went along.

"Aye, little minime I can see that your future is to be with her and I hope you will treasure that" My Tío Bruno went up to me and gave me a pat on my shoulder.

As I felt three people suddenly hugged me tight.

"It felt like yesterday, you are just our baby bro but look at you now!" Luisa said as tears filled up her eyes, getting proud of her primo.

"You two look perfect for each other, primo. I swear if you will hurt her, its cactuses for you" Isabela said as I scratched my head nervously. Hurting Y/N is like the death of me, ofcourse I wouldn't do that.

"My primo Camilo who wouldn't stop until he makes us smile today is now getting engaged and its a miracle someone lasted so long for you" Mirabel joked as Isabela jokingly agreed as I frown.

"Hey, that's a foul! Yellow Card!!"

"Kidding! But I am so proud of you, and I hope you're happy to spend another journey of your life with her" She said as they all hugged me again as I thanked them.

I looked at Abuela who was looking at me with a bright smile, as I went up to her to hug.

"My first little boy grandkid, I am so happy for you" She said as I waited for her to continue.

"You might be joking around all the time but I know you're serious for her. The miracle is not how happy your relationship is, the miracle is the both of you. You have each other and I hope you will treasure her, mi hijo" Abuela said as I wiped the tears in her eyes and smiled.

"I will Abuela, Gracias" I hugged Abuela feeling overwhelmed at the words she said, knowing I would always hear her scolding me for seconds always.

As he was left alone, Camilo waited for you at the door. While everyone was at the garden quietly sneaking or fooling around maybe. The garden is at the back of the house so when you will arrive you would not see the others at the front door.

I heard the door bell ring, so I immediately opened the door and pulled her into a tight hug. Because of excitement and nervousness. She was shocked at first, but eventually she hugged back.

"Aawwh my chameleon really missed me~" She cooed at me and kissed my lips. I just chuckled at her without being able to tease her back, because I can feel the tense running up to me now. I let her come in and she immediately sat on the couch. I got some few chips for us to eat and I sat beside her. She put her head on my shoulder as I put my arms around her.

"So what movie do you want to watch?" I asked her, even though I know it is still the same movie she would pick.

"Hmm, how 'bout Encanto?" She said and I just looked at her while raising my brow at her, im so good at acting. That is why I am a theatre kid.

"Seriously? That again? You watched that for more than 10times already" I said faking a cry and she just glared at me.

"Your point? now come on turn it on" She said and kissed my cheeks. I just turned the movie on and we watched it, again.

As I knew it was already close to the middle of the movie, I excused myself to go the bathroom, but Y/N stopped me.

"Aye, why do you need to go? We're almost at the middle. This is the best part" She said and sulked. I need to go now or else this will be ruined, aye, this girl really.

I pecked her lips and told her that I really need to use the bathroom and she just chuckled at me saying she was just joking about stopping me. So I went straight to the garden and told everyone to hide and to get ready.

Third Person's POV

You continued watching the movie as soon as Camilo went to the bathroom. You noticed that the movie keeps on scratching, is the tv broke? You were about to click on the remote when it turned black, scared you broke it.

"Omygod, MILO WHY DID THE SCREEN WENT BLACK?!" You shouted and noticed that he is at the bathroom for too long. You mentally cursed at the thought Abuela be mad at you for breaking their tv.

As the screen went black a video of Camilo started playing, as you started questioning yourself.

"So, uhmmm *waves at the cam* Hola, mi princesa~ well, its been awhile since we started dating a-and im not surprised we had taken this as a long relationship, uhh, I know this sounds cheesy but let me say this...remember the time when we first met..I cant deny that I think I've been l-love at first sight..with you..and im so happy that we became friends after that. When I first confess to you, I was really really nervous at that time. Cause that was the first confession I've ever made. And you're the first girlfriend I've ever had. Thats when I told myself that I will never let go of this girl, I mean it never. For all those happy times that we had I always cherish those memories the most. But through all these happy moments that we have, there will always be sad and hurting moments that every couple is facing. Just like us. But like what I have said, I really love you and I will protect you. There's always a time where I would think of giving up, but my family and yours and...soon-to-be my family*mumbles* they are also there for me in all those times. They made me think that if I really love you, I won't think of giving up my love for you. No matter how badly I would get hurt physically or mentally, it doesnt matter as long as I will have you forever. *teary-eyed* But I am Camilo Madrigal, your boyfriend...I will fight for you and do anything just for you. They don't call me the entertainer for nothing. And I guess I did it successfully, just look at what we are now, we're still together and our relationship is getting stronger than ever. You know who my heart is beating for..ofcourse, its the most beautiful girl and my ONLY love in this world, its you *points at the cam*. To all those promises that we made for each other. I hope it will stay in us longer. I've always been the happiest guy in the world, since im with you. I'll just ask you one question, and it would be save for later *winks at the cam and chuckles after* Mi amor, vida, princesa, mi querida, cariña, you are mine as I am also yours. Remember that, I love you always and forever my baby~ *kisses the cam and smiles* Oh and btw, after this come to the garden, Te amo!!~"

The screen went black again and you were so touched at the moment on what he did. You felt like crying being so lucky to have him. After a minute of trying to process youe thoughts and calm your emotions , you walked your way to the garden to see him.

As on your way to the garden, you noticed the rose petals making its way on the ground. you smiled at the effort that Camilo made but you wondered whats the occassion? When you arrived at the garden you were so shocked at how it was. There are lights that brighten up the garden,the food that smells so nice, you were really sure that this was Tía Julieta's cooking tho and the pictures that is hanging. One by one you went near the pictures to see it and noticed the notes that was beside it.

You smiled at the pictures 'coz it reminds you of the memories you and Camilo had for the past years. There was your first date, and the time he took you to their home to meet his family, your first dance, his confession and so much more. You felt a tear left your eyes, not of sadness, but because of happiness and the overwhelming feeling. You looked around to find Camilo, but you can't see him.

"Cami, where are you??" You looked around but still no sign of him. You continued to looked around until you heard someone's voice behind you.

"Looking for me, Amor?" He said while chuckling, as you turned around you were so shocked at what you saw.

It's just him holding a bunch of amazing stuffs. Like so MANY stuffs, at those time you are already in tears as you really appreciate all of these.

"I tried my best to make this night memorable for you, hope you like-" Camilo was cutted off by you kissing his lips and smiling at him.

"Don't worry, I love it more than you ever know. I love you" You looked at him with full of love and sincerity in your eyes, as he just smiled at you.

"I love you too Mi Vida, oh before I forget, these are now yours" He said to me and you just chuckled at him.

"Here you go one big chameleon stuffed toy for you, which is a lot bigger than you and incase you miss me you can just stare at that" He said while laughing as you just pouted at him and he just kissed you. He hand me the chameleon stuff animal and you put it beside you coz it's really big and heavy to say the least.

"One boquet of blue and pink flowers for you" he handed me the boquet which you stared in awe coz it was your two favorite colors.

"And also these two boxes, open it" He said and smiled. You put the boquet on the side table and opened the boxes.

It shows a cute necklace that has the pendant of heart, it is so cute. Camill grab the necklace and put it in your neck. As you opened the next box and it has a yellow bracelet with a chameleon pendant and Camilo also put it around your wrist. At this time you are really crying.

Camill just chuckled and cupped your face while wiping the tears. "Hey, dont cry yet amor"

"This is too much Camil-" Camilo cut you off by pecking you on the lips.

"It's okay, this is for you" He said and then handed out a bunch of chocolates.

"Yeheeyy, chocolates~" You cooed and he just chuckled. You are about to give him some but you noticed that he suddenly looked nervous.

"Amor, why does it look like you're nervous?" You said laughing at him and he just chuckled nervously, sus.

"Y/N L/N, amor, I love you so much always remember that. I will love you as long as I live. Im so lucky to have you, now I know that it is not impossible to reach the moon. For you are my moon, the one who provides me light in my darkest hour, you give light to my dark world. Well I hope this relationship will stand strong. Face all the odds along way. Overcome each problems that will arrive. Prove to others that our love will last till the end. And thy words will last forever. I love you mi amor" you are currently in awe at what he just said. Camilo grabbed something from his pockets. It is a paper with a big heart design.

"What is this Cami?" You asked looking at him confused

"Just read it, vida" Camilo said and kissed your cheeks.

You opened the letter and read whats inside it. It's a poem made by him.

"When you came into my life

I was been bless that time

Love is the first word I can describe

Let me be with you so I can survive

You're my everything I want to be

On the first day that we met, my eyes sparkles with glee

Up until now, I still love you with all mighty

My heart is beating only for you

And I know you feel the same way too

Right before we had this relationship

Reality made my feelings too hard to keep

You and me are like a cute couple to clip

Mi vida,querida,baby,princesa, my love

Eternity will bring us and our love on top"

At that moment you are already crying, you were so touched on what he made for you. Thru all of these, you felt being the luckiest girl in the world to have such perfect boyfriend.

As you were reading the poem Camilo can't help but to smile because a minute by now you will be his fiancé. But still he gets nervous, and negative thoughts are running on his mind.

After you read it, you suddenly hugged Camilo while crying, as he hugged back tightly. Once you pulled away, Camilo wiped your tears away, cupping your cheeks

"I am so thankful that I have you-" Camilo cutted you off by kissing you and smiled geniunely, as his nervousness had gotten worse.

"No, I should say that. Thank you and btw c-can you like go through the poem again?" Camilo said smiling nervously.

"Oh okay then, Milo I love the poem. Don't be nervouse coz I love it" You said with a reassuring smile. Camilo mentally cursed knowing his nervousness was showing obviously.

"Look at the first letter of ever sentence" Camilo said, getting ready for the big move. Trying not to have the feeling of nervousness. Because being nervous makes everything go back to zero.

"W-I-L-L-Y-O-U-M-A-R-R-Y-M-E, Okay I don't get it" You said with confusion evident in the tone.

"You don't get it coz you spelled it, try reading it" Camilo said being confident than ever. This is it!

"Oh okay, Will You Marry-" You suddenly stopped and looked at him with wide eyes. After that you started crying, as Camilo just look at you in awe while wiping your tears away, he kinda feel bad because you cried a lot today. "—Omygosh, WILL YOU MARRY ME? C-Camilo..."

Camilo knelt with one knee on the ground and pulled the box in his pockets and opened it as it showed a beautiful and real diamond ring. Perfect ring for the perfect one.

"Mi Amor. Y/N L/N will you marry me?" Camilo asked, hoping you would say yes.

"No—"

"WHAT!?"

"Let me finish, Camilo" You scolded him as he sighed in relief, scared that was your answer.

You nodded you head as more tears fell out from you eyes. "No way I wouldn't keep you to be my husband so..YES!! I will marry you, yess!!"  Camilo can feel the tears from his eyes. YOU SAID YES!!

He stood up to hug and kiss you. But before that, Camilo put the ring on your finger first and thankfully it was a perfect fit. He felt like the luckiest guy in the world. Because YOU said YES TO HIM.

"I love you Mi vida" You said and kissed him.

"I love you too Y/N Madrigal~" He said,earning a chuckle from you as hugged you for awhile. "Btw, I still have a surprise for you"

"Wait another surprise, Camilo Madrigal, I am so done crying already" you said while laughing.

"So, whats the sur-"

"FELICIDADES!!"

Everyone suddenly showed up from their hiding places as you saw both your family and his.

His family went up to hug him, mostly Pepa who was really a crying mess peppering Camilo with kisses.

Your brothers and parents also hugged you as you kept crying.

"You are not anymore our little girl" Your mother said as your father tries to calm her down.

You looked at your two older brothers and noticed that they were about to cry, as you gestured your arms as they hugged you which cause you to chuckle.

"Remember the time you two said, you're gonna cry when I will change my surname"

"Yeah, but you're not yet married and had a wedding so gonna save these tears" Your brother, Kyle said as Tyler was looking up ti stop his own tears.

The night went on as a celebration, you were so happy. Pepa would constantly cry together with your mother, as you and Camilo would both calm them down.

Everybody was happy, especially you and Camilo.

"Hey, Y/N Madrigal c'mere" Camilo said gesturing for you to come closer as he wrapped his arms around you.

"I bet you will call me that from now on, huh" You teased as he just chuckled and kiss your head.

"Ofcourse, it suits you"

[thatferrybroad]

@octopusdreamsofaquaticsheep

Sensory processing disorder. If I close my eyes I don't know where my body is. If my eyes are not on the bee, I am incapabe of estimating its location

Tbf I haven't been stung since I was like... 7 when I spent a lot of unsupervised time alone in forests in southern indiana.

have you ever been stung by a bee?

[silcoseye]

Volatile P4: Face to Face; Cheek to Cheek

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

WARNINGS: gender-neutral reader, mentions of food, smoking (if u do not, just ignore ;-;), alcohol consumption, violence (murder, death, child labour, abuse, knives, stabbing) sleep deprivation, use of makeup, mentions of nightmares, mentions of issues sleeping (alluded insomnia) sorry if i missed any

excited for you guys to read this one and tell me what you think <3 i need to stop rambling and writing such long chapters man ;-; i clearly do not have the self control y/n possessed. oh to be y/n one day. anyways. enjoy simps!!

9603 words

Recently, you decided to go through your scrap metals. Instead of completely getting rid of them by melting them together like you were used to, to not waste the materials, you found yourself with an abundance. It would be wasteful to just create an alloy, so you decided to try and repurpose them- craft something. You had spoken to Jinx about your own desire to draw and were surprised when she offered to help you, handing you a crayon and sheet of paper. This time it was her encouraging and teaching you how to draw a fish. It was fun. Then when Silco arrived to collect her, you saw the look of pride on his face when he saw your awkward-looking fish, and waved by to Jinx who said she'd teach you more the next day.

Captivated and overwhelmed by the sudden artistic urges to create, you worked tirelessly into the night- curving, welding, and shaping the metal into your desired shape. The sudden loud knock on your door caused you to jump in surprise, almost dropping the heat gun in your hands. You made sure everything was turned off in your workshop and slowly exited, wincing as your eyes stung and watered at the light and noise, a pounding headache quickly forming. You'd stayed up all night again. Fuck- that meant Silco and Jinx were here already. You glanced down as the girl rushed into your workshop as usual, but didn't miss how Silco's eyes scanned over your clothing,

"You wore this yesterday," His eyes lingered on your face, squinting judgementally as he studied the dark circles under your eyes,

"Ahaa... Yeah, I got really distracted and didn't realise the time," You said, trying to smooth down your dishevelled hair and stepping aside as he walked past you, looking over your apartment. You shut the door behind him, blinking slowly and wearily following him and trying to ignore the fact that your eyes were barely able to stay open. A yawn escaped your lips reluctantly, and even if you tried to hide it behind your hand his attentive ears caught the noise of your small gasp and slow inhale of air,

"You didn't sleep at all," He stated, glancing up as he saw Jinx emerge back from your workshop with a frown at your state. You wanted to slink back slightly, feeling as if he was reprimanding you, "You didn't eat breakfast," He added, looking over your clean kitchen and noticing everything was in the exact same place as it was when he last came over, no sign of a meal being made the night before or an hour prior. Moving from where he stood next to you to stand in front of you, he moved his hands behind his back and scrutinised you. Under his piercing gaze, you rubbed your forehead slightly, feeling a headache begin to form, "Care to explain why you haven't been looking after yourself?" He asked,

"I..." You sighed, "You know what happens when I get too focused on something, Silco," You said, to which he hummed, but his expression was unmoving. For a moment more, he just studied your face, before he turned to the girl,

"Jinx, you'll have an off day today for the sake of (Y/N)'s health," He wouldn't let you get a word of protest in as she quickly ran over to the two of you, taking a small pouch that clinked with coins that he had on him, and nodded, "I need you to get something for (Y/N) to eat, and make sure it's not made of pure fat or sugar," He called after the overexcited girl as she put her shoes on, yelling an okay, and leaving your home slamming your door shut. You winced at the noise and slowly followed after Silco to your kitchen,

"You don't have to... Do all that," You grumbled, rubbing your eyes and blinking wide to try and encourage your exhausted body to stay awake, "You don't have to look after me,"

"Evidently, it appears I have to," He said with a sigh. This wasn't entirely a sign of disappointment, it was also mixed with care. You blinked in surprise at a mug of tea being placed in front of you, having clearly dozed off for a moment. Silco gave you another stern look, causing you to mumble a thank you and take a sip, "What caused you to stay up so late?" He asked curiously,

"Oh, I remembered I had lots of scrap metal and instead of letting it go to waste, I thought maybe I should try to make something with it," You said with a sigh, moving to sit on one of the tall seats, resting your elbows on the table, "Nothing fancy mind you, I was just inspired by Jinx. You remember how she started teaching me how to draw?" He nodded, "I decided I was going to be creative and start to weld or uh... Create one with the metal. I got really close to finishing it and then you guys showed up," you explained, "It was supposed to be a private project, I guess. But I'm guessing she's already seen it," You sighed softly, eyes closing again,

"Mhm," It really didn't help that his voice was so smooth and soft, and his speaking right now could just lull you to sleep, right here at the table, "(Y/N)?" He asked, a hand coming to rest on your shoulder. You opened your eyes, hooded and almost closing again. Truly, you were exhausted, "Hey, stay awake until Jinx gets back and you eat something," He requested you, and you groaned softly,

"Fine, but you need to do something to me to keep me awake," You said, watching him for a moment as he considered your words,

"Alright. Do you have any questions you want to ask me?" You raised your brows,

"Really?" He nodded, "You're going to be open and vulnerable with me?" You asked, your playful tone being dimmed slightly by tiredness lacing the words together. He chuckled at that,

"No, just because you said that I'm banning you from asking any questions,"

"Noooo," You whined, "But you're oh so dramatic and so mysterious that my mind is constantly perplexed by the myriad of mysteries that surrounds you," You said, lazily falling your hands in the air. Hearing Silco's genuine laugh pleasantly surprised you. It had been years, you thought since he'd laughed so freely,

"Myriad of mysteries?" He repeated, the amusement still clear in his tone, "My, my, dear," He shook his head, "I've no idea where you got that from- you must be very sleep-deprived,"

"That's what happens when you don't sleep," You announced, "I made the connection,"

"I made the connection," He said, causing you to whine in response, as he simply shook his head with a small chuckle, walking away from the counter, "Let's go see what you were working on," He said, watching you slide off the seat and walk to him. He stuck out his arm a little, and when you look at him in confusion, he just glanced down at his outstretched arm. Looping your arm with his and letting him lead you to your dimly lit workshop, you let out another yawn, too tired to let your body react to his touch. His touch...

He stopped at your workbench, clattered with spare parts, crews, various tools, and one metal fish in the middle of the chaos. Sleepily, you watched him pick it up with his free hand,

"Oh don't even look at it. It's not finished, it still needs the details," A yawn broke your sentence and you gently let your headrest on his shoulder, "I'm considering scrapping it anyways,"

"Don't do that," He said quickly, and looking up at him, you noticed he was inspecting it delicately and with high interest. The fish's movements were articulated and floppy, behaving like a real fish, but the metal parts clinked whenever the fish was moved. He hummed softly, impressed, letting go of you and moving its open bottom jaw to touch the top, watching it swing back open as he took his fingers off the metal, "(Y/N) you clearly put a lot of effort into this. You can't just throw it away," He said, looking down at you, leaning against the workbench and facing him,

"If you love the fish so much, keep it," You said, and watched him raise his brows,

"I will. Thank you," He said, glancing up as he heard a knock on your door and momentarily leaving you. Jinx soon appeared, followed closely by Silco who indicated for you to follow him to the kitchen and disappeared. Jinx ran to you, excitedly,

"(Y/N) I really like your fish!" she told you happily, and you noticed she was the one now holding it. Clearly, a trade of sorts had occurred between her and Silco as he let her back in, "I'd like for you to teach me how to make fish like this," she asked politely,

"Mhm," You hummed, patting her head, "Sure. You know, your dad's the one keeping it," She blinked at your words,  "I don't like it that much. Once I sleep, and if we have enough free time, I'll show you. You've been doing well in your classes anyway so, you deserve a fun break," You said, walking to the door,

"Silco's... My dad?" She asked sweetly, her voice barely above a whisper. You looked down at her and nodded your head,

"Hell yeah, kid," You smiled at her, "He cares about you like you're his daughter- anyone can see that," You said, patting her head again gently as you walked to the kitchen, looking at the plate of food sat before you. Before he could command you to eat, you found the smell had already done its work of awakening your dormant hunger, and you quickly ate your breakfast. Once you were done, he set your plate in the sink and rounded the table again,

"Let's get you to bed," His voice was soft again and you enjoyed it, accompanied by his touch guiding you back to your room, the fatigue settling in. He helped you to bed, offering to help you change but as you groaned tiredly into the sheets, he laughed,

"I'll take that as no. Goodnight, (Y/N)," He said, standing up and leaving you to get a good days rest. Before your body willingly submitted to its exhaustion, you heard the faint click of a door, as well as murmurs of Jinx and Silco's voices, but you couldn't make them out. You let them lull you to sleep.

A few weeks had passed. When Silco dropped Jinx off at your home today, he seemed like his usual self, giving you a nod and asking that once your lessons were finished, to come to 'The Last Drop' and meet him there. Your lesson went by smoothly: you tried out new ideas for bombs, helped Jinx with whatever she needed, and allowed yourself to end early, showing her how to make creatures out of scrap metal. She took off to welding, cutting and creating her own under your supervision until eventually, she produced a creature,

"Oh Woah-" You smiled, picking it up and looking it over, "-Jinx you're so good at this. It always astonishes me to see how fast you just... Pick up on things," You complimented her, before handing her sculpture back,

"And watch this," You completely missed the wind-up key on its back, and that at some point she had just put this mechanism in. You watched as she cranked it, letting the creature hop around the desk in a circle, "It does that for thirty seconds and then boop," She smiled as it rattled to a halt, "He stops," You smiled proudly,

"Good work Jinx! It'll be something you can show Silco," You added,

"My dad," She quickly corrected, making your heart warm, "He's my dad now," she clarified,

"Course. Let me get dressed and then I'll take you back home," You said, moving to your bedroom and changing out of your apron and workshop clothes, the smell of smoke and chemicals leaving you and being replaced by cleaner clothes in your usual style. You let yourself reflect on how things were before with Jinx and Silco. They really accepted each other as their respective family members and it was wholesome to see how close they got in such a short time. You couldn't help but think about where you fit into this mix...

With a sigh, you willed the thoughts out of your head and finished getting ready. Fixing up a necklace as you left your room you looked to Jinx, smiling softly at the creature in her hands and inspecting it, "Let's go," you told her, making her look up at you with a nod.

Your walk with her was filled with easy chatter between you two, Jinx mostly expressing her excitement in creating a new creature tomorrow, informing you the one in her hands was a sharp-mouthed bird called 'Dino', and asking you about the mechanisms necessary for more articulation. Before long, the two of you made it inside 'The Last Drop' and looked around for any sign of Silco or Sevika. Considering neither of them were here to take Jinx off your hands, the two of you moved to the bar and ordered some juice. Jinx happily asked more questions, which you eagerly answer, until eventually she became too tired of talking and with a small sigh scanned the place for Silco. It was getting late- he was always on time, and was usually able to predict whenever he'd be late and tell you. With a dissatisfied hum, you watched the young child walk confidently to one of Silco's henchmen,

"Hey," She asked, her hands going to her hips to appear tougher, likely seeing Silco doing the same. You watched as he slowly looked down at the girl, pausing his task of washing down the table, "D'you know where Silco is?" She asked. You watched him intensely, raising your brows as he looked to you, and then back to her,

"He left," is all he said, before going back to cleaning the tables in the area. You didn't expect someone who just worked under Silco, and in a bar, he just happened to take over, would know exactly where he was. It was still little that he wasn't here. If this henchman knew Silco was in his office, he wouldn't lie. Not to Jinx's face. It was actually quite funny to you- how a lot of these people were afraid of such a small kid who at first glance happened to have no power. Simply being Silco's daughter earned her respect. With a grimace, you watched Jinx return with her head hung and a frown on her face. She grabbed her cup, taking a long sip through her straw,

"I wonder where he is..." She said sadly to you, swinging her legs on the stool. You watched her, not used to this quiet, in-her-head Jinx. To try cheer her up, you spoke,

"Hey, I'm sure he's fine. Just running a little bit late," You said softly, "How about we go back to my house and hang out there while we wait for him?" You offered, "You know you can't be here when the night's parties start," You said with a small sigh, watching her nod

"But what if he comes back and gets mad we're not here?" She asked worriedly,

"Then we can just tell someone we were here but went back to wait for him," You said, glancing to the bartender, "Hey," You called the bartender's attention, "Can you tell Silco when he comes back that (Y/N) and Jinx are waiting for him back at my home?" You said, biting your tongue to stop the smile threatening to grace your lips at the implications of the phrase. The bartender simply nodded, going back to washing glasses, "See? Now he'll know we're not in danger or trouble. Come on," You beckoned, setting your empty glass on the counter and standing, offering her your hand. She took it, walking out with her juice still in hand.

Returning home, you tried to think of ways to distract her, proving difficult. The first thing that came to your mind is offering to show her how to make a different creature but she just shook her head. Glancing around your home again, you offered to bake with her,

"We can make cupcakes this time?" You said, smiling, "It's like a cake but in these paper wrappers. They're smaller than a whole cake, and you hold them in your hand and ear. Or we could make another cake-"

"(Y/N), did he leave me here?" You were surprised to see her hugging herself and avoiding your gaze. Her voice quivered as she spoke, "Did he... Did he go?" she asked quieter, your heart breaking for the child,

"Jinx no-" Your eyes grew wider as she visibly flinched at your words, taking a step back as you stepped closer to try and comfort her. "He... Look," You paused, staying where you were and crouching to be level with her, watching tears spill down her cheeks as she pressed the bottom of her palm against her eyes to try to halt them, "Silco sometimes gets very busy with his work, you know this. Just because he's late doesn't mean-"

"He's never late," She interjected sharply, and you nodded in acknowledgement to the strange circumstances,

"I know. It is weird- he's usually very punctual. Maybe he got caught up on something," you told her,

"What if he got hurt?" She asked worriedly crying openly now. You felt helpless, she was clearly trapped in her mind, thoughts spiralling, "What if he never wants to see me again? Like Vi?" Who was Vi? For a moment, you didn't know what to say, staring blankly at the girl. You had to calm her down, stop this train of thought from snowballing more,

"I don't know what happened to him," You said truthfully, "But I know Silco is strong. He might not look like it- to be honest, he kinda looks like a rat-" this made her laugh, good, "-but I promise you that he's good at protecting himself and those around him," You assured her, "I grew up with him remember? He protected me, he'll do the same for you," You watched her consider your words,

"So he'll come back to me?" she asked, her voice was quiet again. You nodded with a reassuring smile,

"Of course he will," You affirmed, "He came back for me. He'll do the same with you," you said, watching as she whipped the tears from her face into her forearms, taking a breath to calm herself. She was quiet for a bit, before speaking up

"As much as I want to try a cupcake... I just want to draw now," she said, to which smiled. Good, she was calm,

"Course," You said, "Go to the living room I'll get some paper," you said, leaving to your storage closet, digging around for some paper and crayons that you kept on hand for her. You smiled softly, noticing the drawing pad you bought her a while ago but forgot about. The few times you had noticed it, you made mental notes to give her the pad but always forgot. Considering she was still down, you knew this would be the perfect time, "Hey Jinx?" you called her attention, walking to your living room where she now sat on the floor in front of your coffee table. She looked up at you with her large grey eyes in curiosity as you placed the pad in front of her,

"What's this?" She asked, flipping through the empty pages confused,

"It's a place for you to keep all your drawings," You told her, and she smiled so brightly it lit up the room again, "So instead of having all these loose pages they're all confined in here and easy to keep track of. Hang on, I might have some glue you can use if you want to stick anything in," You left, and when you returned you saw she was already occupied with her doodles. Deeming this a safe enough distraction, you moved off to the kitchen to make yourself some tea, as well as a hot chocolate for her.

Silco was late. Very late. Usually, he would be able to predict being an hour or two late. Today he didn't tell you anything about not being on time. He rarely discussed business with you, only ever responding that it's 'good' and not giving you more information. Today, he was almost five hours late. 'The Last Drop' would be opening up by now, with no sign of its host. Nervously tapping your fingers in time with the clock ticking handles, you waited for the kettle and at the cup of milk in a pot on your stove to boil. What was going on? Perhaps Jinx was right to worry so much. You had told him it was no problem for you to watch over her here, where it was safe when his work got a bit too chaotic or dangerous for a child. You would have greatly appreciated a word of warning before, though. Rejoining her again at the table, now trying to now quell your own bubbling thoughts of worry, you gave her a small tight smile as she thanked you for the hot chocolate,

"(Y/N)?" she asked, picking up the blue crayon to now draw with, "You grew up with him, right?" She looked at you. With a confirming nod, she continued, "What was that like?"

"Oh! It was uhm..." You said, raking your brain for any stories you could tell her that were... appropriate, "It was nice. One night, on my birthday, he took me up to Piltover to show me the stars and-"

"I know that one," She said, surprising you, "He tells it to me a lot. He says that was the happiest he's ever seen you," You blushed softly, taking a sip of your tea,

"Huh.. Well, that's nice to hear," You said, with a smile,

"Tell me another one," She demanded, stopping colouring to focus on you entirely, arms crossing over the book as she leaned forward in intrigue,

"Another?" You asked, and watched as she nodded,

"A story I haven't heard," She added,

"You're gonna have to help me out here, kid- I don't know what you know and don't," you said, making her giggle,

"Hmm... I know the star one, I know his eye one, I know the rooftop one-"

"You know what happened to his eye?" you asked. He told her the story of how he lost his eye? Considering how literal Silco was, you feared how many details he had told her,

"Yeah. He said that Vander was his brother, and they had a fight and he almost drowned. His eye was badly messed up and the chemicals in the water made it go bad. Then you saved him and then he went to the scientist in the underground lab," you stared at her in alarm, noticing how casually she told the story, "It was a boring story. He just kept talking and talking and I fell asleep," you laughed nervously,

"And you know the rooftop one?" you asked, and she nodded,

"He took you to a rooftop and you were scared to go down," You blushed,

"I just kept thinking I was gonna fall," She explained, and were surprised she nodded with understanding,

"For a while, I kept thinking monsters would take me away and eat me," She said, "But Silco said he'd kill the monsters if they ever tried to come for me," You nodded,

"Yes, that sounds like him," you let yourself take another sip,

"Tell me a story then!" She demanded, eagerly now, causing you to laugh again at her insistence and went back to searching your brain, staying quiet for a moment. You could feel her eyes on you,

"Hmm.. Has he told you about the knife?" You asked, and smiled softly as she shook her head,

"No, tell me, tell me!" She asked enthusiastically, making you laugh,

"Alright. Back when Silco and I were younger, we mostly worked in the mines all day. We weren't that close yet, but we knew about each other. The mines were a lot of hard, dangerous work. We'd see our friends getting hurt every day because of the machinery, the rocks, the tight passages and toxic chemicals. We didn't have anyone to protect us from that, so we had to protect and rely on each other. That closeness brought us all together. At some point, a few of us got tired of being down there, breathing those chemicals in all day and being treated horribly. Only thing was, if we wanted to leave the mines, we would be left without a job, money, and a home. Our only option to survive was to turn to crime," You explained, "Silco and I got close then. We made a reputation for ourselves- a bad one. In the beginning, it was simple muggings and petty theft. In those times, the Uppersiders would just turn up in certain areas they claimed as their own. And if you were as charming as Silco, you could hold their attention long enough for someone like me to snatch a few coins or expensive nicknacks they had in their pockets" You said with a wink, "One day, someone caught on to what we were doing and demanded we gave them their things back. If we did, it was likely we wouldn't be able to feed ourselves, so of course, we said no. In hindsight, maybe we should have just run away... We didn't know they bought any backup and fighting four against two was never gonna work out well," You grimaced, "Being the tough guy he is, Silco took on the largest guy. I thought I could trick the other three and get them to chase a blind trail, then go back and help Silco. What I would do is find plates that looked golden, and widdled them down to resemble coins. From far away, they were quite convincing. Only when you looked up close, you could tell they were fake. I grabbed a handful and threw them away, before running in the opposite direction. Unfortunately, only one of them bought it, the other two doubled down and blocked me into a corner. At that point in my life, I didn't know how to fight correctly, let alone defend myself. We were still in our early thieving days, no one had taught me, and Silco was just a kid I happened to work with. One of them had a knife and I got stabbed in the side in the scuffle. I made a big show of falling to the floor, and I guess once these assholes realised they had hurt a child, they ran off. Silco found me and bought me to this shared home we had- there were about twenty kids there already- and he was the only one I knew. He told me it was a good thing that knife was dull and I was able to move too quickly because I wasn't seriously hurt. But then he told me no one had ever sacrificed themselves for him like that. I guess that's when we started trusting each other with our lives. We slept in the same room, often sharing clothes and possessions. For a while, it was me, him, Vander, and a few other kids our age. We slept further away from them, closer to a door and window. I... Had a lot of issues sleeping when I was younger-"

"Like nightmares?" Up until now, she had listened intently, not asking any questions,

"Uhm... Maybe? Finding a home was difficult- considering we weren't working anymore our superiors kicked us out to the Lanes. I didn't know Silco well enough when we left, so I was sleeping on the streets alone for long enough that I became too restless and attentive," You said, "I was always scared someone would hurt or steal from me. Silco found me, saying he recognised me from the mines and asked if I needed a home. The rent was very cheap- I'm always thankful for... Agh, I can't remember her name," You put a hand to your forehead, sighing as the name escaped you, "She let a lot of kids stay with her for very cheap. She was a kind woman. Kinder than she needed to be," You said, smiling fondly, "Anyway- on the nights I couldn't fall asleep, Silco thought the best way to help me was to tire me out. We'd sneak out outside and chase through the lanes, or find interesting places to hang out in until we grew tired and went back home. The knife was probably a gift for my sixteen or seventeenth birthday. He showed me this scrap of fabric- a fancy one too, clearly from an uppersider who wasn't careful- and said he got something for me. It was this small switchblade. He'd carved out initials into it, and then for the rest of the night, he taught me how to use it," You smiled, reminiscing the memories of your younger selves, "Well that was until we got too tired and had to go back home," You said, "Stars, that feels so long ago now..." You sighed,

"It sounds very lovely," She smiled brightly, "Do you still have it?"

"Of course! I couldn't possibly throw it away," Your smile matched hers, "It was such a special gift- here give me a second," You quickly left to your bedroom to retrieve it, not realising the spring in your step. It was located in the drawers next to your bed, ready to be grabbed at any moment in case you felt unsafe, even if it was still unsharpened. Before coming back, you took a short detour to your storage closet, grabbing the glue you promised her a while ago. Returning, you set the knife down in front of her, and placed the glue nearby "There," Jinx took the knife, looking over it curiously, her fingers running over your roughly etched letters, and finally setting it down,

"I think it's a really nice gift," She said happily,

"It is," You agreed, and as she asked you for another, you gave a small sigh, racking your brain once again.

You were thankful Jinx was a heavy sleeper.  Just as you were exiting the spare bedroom you set up for her to sleep in for the night, you jumped at the sudden pounding on your front door, startled. Grabbing the switchblade from your coffee table, you approached the door, opening it slightly with your weapon ready. You likely wouldn't do a lot of damage, but at least you were armed,

"Silco!" You exclaimed in surprise, gasping softly and moving to the side as he stormed inside, looking around wildly. Something wasn't right. He stood still, scanning your apartment momentarily, eventually settling his on you,

"Where's Jinx?" He asked. He was dishevelled clearly- strands of hair hanging over his forehead and sticking to the accumulated sweat there, eye wide, making him resemble a dear caught in the lights. The intense expression on his face conveyed fear and showed you he was alert. There were tear tracks that caught in your overhead lighting. Had he been crying?

"In the spare room- Silco what's-" You barely got your sentence in when he gracefully, yet rapidly moved to the room you mentioned and entered. You heard Jinx's happy exclamation of 'Dad!', and slowly moved to the door to watch as Silco dropped to his knees near her bed, embracing her tightly. He appeared to be shaking slightly,

"Where were you? I was worried you left me o-or got hurt," You heard Jinx say, sounding like she was on the brink of tears or crying already,

"I just had a few things to attend to," His voice was soft; but it was evident to you he was trying to sound sure of himself and not worry her anymore, "Forgive me. I didn't realise the time," His body betrayed him. He was shaking like a leaf, alarmed, or frightened by something unknown. Something that had happened to him. Suddenly feeling like an intruder, you made yourself useful and went to your kitchen, deciding to make some more tea would allow them more time alone, and you to collect yourself. As you put the kettle on, you noticed your heart beating rapidly in your chest and placed a hand over it as if to steady it.

Silco was unharmed and safe, but clearly scared. This was good and strange, and so unusual it was unsettling. Moments later, Silco emerged again, quietly shutting the door behind him. You turned your head to watch as the man stooped slightly, bending down to press his forehead to the door momentarily, his hand still resting on the door handle. You watched his eyes squeezing shut, and his lips mumble something, before he straightened and looked to you, catching your gaze. His red eye gleamed in the now dark room, and you could only see his outline. As he joined you in the kitchen, standing near you, his features were illuminated by your bright kitchen lights.

He reached for your warm mug, bringing the tea to his lips and taking a long drink, before setting the cup down and looking at his hands that now rested against the counter. You heard the mug clink as he set it down, and didn't miss how it shook slightly in his hand. Was it best to ask him anything, or just sit in silence and let him work out whatever was going on on his own?

He didn't speak, just stood there, frozen in place and staring at a spot on your counter. His hands were pressed hard into the table, fists balled up. You could see a few veins in his skinny arms, and you realised he wasn't wearing his usual long jacket. His sleeves were rolled up, allowing you to just stare. He wasn't shaking anymore, but his breaths were audible. Slowly, you moved away from the counter, deciding it was best to leave him to his thoughts. You were surprised to hear the rustle of clothes, and you turned your head, seeing him stand and follow you,

"I... Thought you wanted to be alone," you explained, standing at your bedroom door,

"No," He said sharply, his voice low and breathy, panicked. Blinking rapidly, you glanced towards your room and bit your lip, "I don't want to be alone," His voice was a whisper, afraid if anyone else heard they'd view him as weak. Your eyes grew wide in shock and fear. You hated how mysterious he was in moments like this when all you desperately wanted him to be blunt and honest with what he wanted from you,

"Okay," You said, "Well.. I'm gonna go on the landing outside," You said, watching as he nodded. You led him through your room and prayed he wouldn't notice or ask about the apron or pile of clothes on your bed. You stopped at a door, opening it to let light into the dark place, and stepped out onto an open landing that had two chairs, a table, and an ashtray full of ash and cigarette butts looking over the gothic underground city. Watching as he slowly followed you and surveyed the area, his gaze focused on the small tables only item. Moving to a withered plant pot off to the side, you produced a box of cigarettes, offering him one. A light chuckle emitted from him as he took one, inspecting it. He was clearly relaxing again,

"You still smoke these?" He asked bemused, and you smiled as you put them back, grabbing a lighter,

"Hey, not everyone can afford Piltover's finest cigars," You said, lighting the end for him as he put it to his lips, "And not all the time. Only when I need to relax," You noticed the slight tremor in his hand as he moved it away from his mouth, exhaling the smoke,

"Star's, that's horrible," He said with a grimace, looking over the cigarette in his hand and handing it to you and sitting in one of the chairs. You laughed, moving to occupy the other,

"You get used to it," you said, glancing back at him, seeing a small smile of recognition on his lips. With a small sigh, he leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, and put his face in his hands, rubbing over his face. His smile quickly faded, his expression turning serious as he turned his gaze up,

"I'm not usually late like this," He began, glancing at you,

"We were both getting worried..." You admitted, watching him intently, "What happened?" You asked bravely, "We went to 'The Last Drop' and you weren't there... I asked the bartender to let you know we came back here," He nodded his head again,

"Do you have any alcohol?" He asked, and you nodded. Walking by him to get back inside, you were surprised when he reached out and grabbed your hand. Stopping, you watched him take the cigarette from your hand, bringing it to his lips and leaning his head back in the chair, hands drifting to rest between his legs. You left and came back quickly, trading the bottle for the cigarette and blushing at the feeling of his soft, slender fingers against yours for a second. For a moment he said nothing, and the longer you sat in silence, letting the cigarette burn out, the more you realised you'd likely overstepped an unspoken boundary. Looking down, you readied an apology. Instead, you heard the liquid moving against the glass bottle, a few gulps, and then the clink of the glass as it was set back down,

"The deal got called off," He spoke lowly, his voice rough, his tone turning bitter as you turned to focus on him, "I lost six barrels of Shimmer to some children. They ambushed us out of nowhere on some... Floating boards and burned our product.  The buyer called off the deal, and wanted to have me killed until Sevika put him in his place," He said, anger clear in his tone. A chill ran down your spine as you thought about the implications, "Then we went back. And..." he trailed off, going quiet again. You noticed his shaking hands clench and unclench, nervously. This was strange for him, "Something happened then..." He nodded, taking another long swig,

"And it took you longer to get back," He nodded again at your words. Without asking more you lifted the cigarette to your lips and inhaled the smoke, thinking of what to say as your gaze turned skywards, "did-"

"No, (Y/N). Let me finish," He interrupted sternly, prompting you to shut your lips. He took another swig, before beginning again, "Zaun has always been a violent place... I know that," He was clearly trying to reason with himself, "You see people getting beaten all the time in the Lanes; in the streets. And the enforcers are getting more brutal every day," He sighed deeply, "I thought it was her," He shook his head, "Jinx," He elaborated, "That somehow, she had gotten out and was looking for me. Those enforcers found her and were killing her," his hands were clenched so hard his knuckles were white against his already pale skin, "I was already pissed off, and seeing that I... I killed them," Your eyes widened at his confession, and he let out a sigh, "It was just a girl with blue hair... Just a fucking kid..." He said emotionally. Shaking his head again and downing the rest of your bottle with a groan, he set it near his feet on the floor "Marcus will..." He groaned, "Fuck," He hissed, leaning back in the chair and placing his hands over his eyes in frustration. Blinking rapidly, you really didn't know how to respond.

The first time you bore witness to Silco killing someone was an accident. He'd been scammed by some kid thinking he was being clever during a card game. As soon as Silco realised, he flew into a rage, and the other kid ran off. You followed them, nervous and knowing what would happen during Silco's violent episodes. When you caught up to the two, the kid was trying to fight back. Trying their best to stay alive. Only moments later, they were on the ground, begging for mercy and offering to give back the money they stole. Silco wasn't listening- so enraged nothing was getting through to him. Only when you dragged him off, did you realise the extent of the damage. You ran so fast your lungs burned and bile rose in your throat, realising what had happened. Neither of you told Vander at first- even though he could tell something was wrong with how unusually quiet the two of you were- until you tearfully confessed. He simply grunted and told you both to 'grow up'. Silco took that to heart. You, on the other hand, didn't.

"I- Silco you can't just kill people because-"

"I thought it was her," He said exasperated, looking at you with desperation clear in his face, "I thought they found Jinx, and they were going to take her away from me," By now, your cigarette had completely burned out, and you placed it into your ashtray. With a slight shake of your head, you sighed, "(Y/N) I promise you I wouldn't have done it without good reason," He said, running a hand through his hair, "I couldn't stand by and let them hurt her like that,"

"I... Silco that doesn't justify murder," You said with a deep frown,

"You think I don't know that?" He laughed coldly, watching you, "Marcus will surely want to know what happened. I can't just tell him it was because I thought my daughter was getting attacked," He sighed deeply, silence falling between you two as you thought. 'My daughter'. The first time he had referred to her as so,

"Perhaps..." You spoke quietly, "Perhaps, you can...?" You said, making him turn his attention back to you,

"You want me to lie to him?" He asked,

"It would save you and Jinx wouldn't it? Or help your case," You said with a frown. You watched him consider and sigh, "The enforcers made a mistake and tried to hurt you. You were simply protecting yourself and her... Or just blame it on the growing violence of the Lanes," he grimaced,

"That won't help, he knows I'm responsible for that," He shook his head, resting his elbows back on his knees, "He's already covering up my affiliation with the Shimmer. I think it'll be more difficult to cover up the random deaths of five enforcers,"

"Maybe it won't be," You said, trying to help, "Random, right? Someone got a little too high, or drunk, and killed them. No witnesses means no suspects, right?" You said, "And considering your position, no one will accuse you if they want to stay alive... Also, who in Zaun would want to help Marcus, of all people?" He watched you curiously,

"I forget how sharp you are sometimes," He muttered, "I'll see... He'll contact me inevitably. Thank you for the help," He said, "All that matters to me now is that Jinx is safe here with you," He said with a solemn nod, which you copied,

"You know I'd never let anything happen to her... Your daughter," You assured him, and he nodded,

"I should have guessed it wasn't her considering you weren't with her," He said, looking to you. He went quiet then, suddenly lost somewhere in his head,

"Are you going to take her home?" You finally asked, "Or will you stay here? I can set the couch up and sleep there while you take my bed," You offered. Silco just sighed deeply,

"(Y/N), we've shared a bed before. And this is your house. If anyone were to take the couch, it would be me," He said bluntly, and you blushed at his words, "And no. Thank you, but I'll take her home. Thank you for looking after her," He said, and although you were disappointed that he wouldn't stay, his words meant so much to you. He trusted you. Clearly there, this meant he trusted you.

"Oh," Is all you said, nodding. He stood, and you followed after him, "I really wouldn't mind you staying," You repeated, in hopes of changing his mind. This was near impossible, with him being so stubborn,

"Goodnight, (Y/N)," He said softly, exhaustion clear in his voice. There was no more use trying to convince him. He let you enter first and closed the door behind you, filling the room with darkness again.

"Hey... Why'd you ask me to come here so early?" You frowned as you stepped into Silco's home, looking around the empty room.

The following morning, at an ungodly hour, you had awoken to Sevika knocking on your door and telling you had a day off. She then told you Silco wanted to see you as soon as you were awake, and gave you thirty minutes. She remained in your living room sitting on your couch and dwarfing it. Sevika exuded power, and it took everything in you not to thirst over how attractive this woman was. The few times she had caught you ogling her muscles were embarrassing, but she'd smirk and you acknowledged you clearly fueled her ego. Once you were done, you blushed as she complimented your outfit, letting out a sharp laugh and escorting you to his home. It was only ten minutes away from yours, and you noticed a few of his henchmen around the area guarding it discretely.

Met with silence, you tried again, "Silco?" you called out, glancing around the living room. The walls were full of Jinx's drawings, stuck to the wall, a few framed, and many others strewn across the floor and table, along with crayons. The only neat thing was the neon markers that lay on the table, organised in rainbow order. You smiled as you saw the fish you had made was decorated and glowing neon, clearly decorated with her favourite markers, and placed on a shelf with a few other knickknacks. Everything else was high quality and miraculously untouched by Jinx's chaos and markers. You turned sharply, hearing the door creak behind you, seeing a sleepy Jinx shutting the door behind you, and struggling to reset the three locks on it. You quickly moved and helped her, before looking down, "Hi Jinx. Good to see you this morning. Do you know where Silco is?" You asked her

"He's in there," she pointed to a door down a long hall with her free hand, the other holding on to the paw of a stuffed bunny "He told me to tell Sevika to come and get you... And now I'm going back to sleep," You watched her cross the room and flop on the pale couch, turning away from you and hugging the bunny tightly. Smiling and whispering a thank you, you walked to the door she indicated. Following up yesterday's conversation, you had wanted to check on Silco regardless to make sure he was alright. You were thankful when he had asked for you to join him, even in the early hours of the morning. Slowly, you knocked,

"Silco? It's me, (Y/N)," You announced, and heard him sigh through a 'come in' behind the door.

Entering you glanced around the neat room. Green light flooded through the window, illuminating his bed and Silco himself, sitting before you with one hand on his forehead, the other clenched tightly, resting against his bouncing knee. He was nervous. His gaze turned upwards to look at you, but quickly he looked back down to his hand. In the dim lights, you couldn't see his features clearly,

"Good morning," You told him with a small smile, to which he only nodded. Sure he wasn't talkative but him being almost silent was new, "Uhm. Sevika and Jinx said you wanted to see me?" You told him, and watched him nod again. He stood from where he was, hands still clenching together tightly as he slowly paced,

"It appears I'm still suffering from the... events that occurred yesterday," the first words he said to you this morning. You tilted your head as you watched him expectantly. He came to a stop near you, turning the lights on and lifting his hands slightly "My hands haven't stopped shaking," He said, and you could detect a hint of embarrassment in his tone. Gently, you looked to his trembling hands, taking them in your own, hoping to comfort him. Your fingers interlocked, and you felt him release a shaky breath, "Ah... Right," He mumbled, "I was hardly able to..." You didn't miss how his gaze flicked to his bedside cabinet, where a cylindrical object was placed. What was that for? "I can't fix the scarring around my eye," He finally said.

Looking up at his face and focusing, you could clearly notice a change in his appearance. Not only were the scars surrounding his eye more prominent, but his skin had also blackened due to the toxicity in the waters decades ago, eroding it away. You remembered that night you saw him again in your home. In the faint light then, you recognised how he had looked the same then as he did now. You guessed he started putting on make-up to cover the extent of the damage, or for Jinx, to not scare her.  It would explain why she wasn't allowed in his room. Glancing to a small vanity table in his room, you noticed the very basics of makeup products littered on top of its surface, along with a hairbrush that still clung on to strands of Jinx's blue hair and with hair bands. You quickly understood what he required you to do,

"You need my help?" you asked him, seeking confirmation,

"Please," The softness in his voice captivated you. Granted, Silco was always more relaxed and soft around you and Jinx, but this? It reminded you of him soothing you at night after a nightmare, or saving you from a particularly dangerous fight. To tell the truth, when you saw him again almost a year ago, you weren't sure if the man you used to know was still there. This was all the proof you needed. You nodded with a silent smile, letting go of him as he moved over to the vanity, getting the products he usually used and handing them back to you. You didn't miss how his touch lingered on your hands before he sat back on the bed and watched you expectantly.

You opened his compact, catching a glimpse of your own face in the small mirror and gently dipping the included pad in the pale-coloured product on the other side. Leaning in close to him, you began to cover the darkened skin but realised you were in an uncomfortable position. With a small breath, you moved to lean one leg on the bed, brushing it involuntarily against his own. You could feel his steady breaths fanning against your face and neck as you worked on covering his skin with an even colour, a soft blush forming on your cheeks at the intimacy. You felt your skin heat up as you worked around his eye, and as you set the compact down near him, placing a hand on his left cheek to tilt his head and give yourself better access to his face, you felt like you were burning.

It took you a few minutes to make sure you had done a good job, the two of you sharing a comfortable silence as you focused on ensuring you applied an even coverage across his face. At some points, you noticed his hands were no longer shaking, and he was entirely relaxed. When you were satisfied with what you had done, you reluctantly moved back. He kept his gaze on you, before picking up the compact and opening it, examining your work with a small smile. If you weren't so focused on his slender hands, you would have missed they still shook. Only ever so slightly,

"Not bad," He said, before handing you the other item- a pencil- to draw on his eyebrow. You carefully took it from him, face falling as you took your lip between your teeth. Noticing your anxiety, he smiled, "Breathe, (Y/N). It's only an eyebrow," He said, "Try get it as even as you can. Usually, I start by dotting the most important points, then connect them with outlines, then fill the space," He said calmly,

"How'd you know how to do all this?" You asked amused, leaning back to study his existing brow, and then reaching out gently to touch his brow bone above the blackened eye. You carefully dotted the beginning of the brow, top of the arc and end of it, moving back each time to see if they were mirroring his existing brow,

"Sevika," He said plainly, and this time you pulled back from his face to stare in shock,

"Really?"

"She's surprisingly good at make up," He said, and you laughed softly, "She is," He added as you smiled, beginning to carefully connect your rough dots,

"I would have never expected it," You admitted, "She doesn't look like she wears any make-up. She's just naturally beautiful," You felt the way his face moved against your hand as he smiled again,

"Looks can be deceiving, my dear," You blushed at the term of endearment, pulling back to compare the two brows. Silco surprised you, leaning his head forwards and looking to the side into his vanity mirror. The urge to suddenly run your hands through his hair overwhelmed you, and you found yourself biting the inside of your cheek to regain some self control,

"Thank you," he said with an approving nod,

"Is it fine?" You asked nervously, looking at him. He smiled as he nodded, taking the products from your hands and standing. He looked down at you appreciatively,

"It's more than fine. Thank you. You've done more than enough for me," He said, moving by you to set them down. You smiled,

"You asked for my help. I wouldn't just ignore you," You told him truthfully, standing in the centre of his room. He was already dressed and ready in his usual fancy clothes, so he led you back to his door and opened it for you. He glanced at Jinx on the couch after following you, and sighed, "Have you eaten yet?" He asked. You watched as he took a seat next to Jinx's sleeping form, a hand gently touching her shoulder as he inspected her sleeping face. You sat on an armchair he had nearby, and shook your head,

"Sevika didn't give me a lot of time. She said your request was urgent," He nodded with a hum,

"I'll get you something to eat when Jinx wakes up," He said, "And then you'll go home and have your day off,"

"I can teach her as normal. It's no problem to me," You quickly said, but he shook his head,

"Take a day off," He repeated, "It'll do you some good," He added, and you sighed,

"Right," You didn't hide the disappointment from your voice, and looked down,

"I did want to invite you out somewhere..." He said, drawing your attention back to him in interest, "I need to discuss it with you in my office first, so be there around 5?" He said, and you nodded,

"Am I gonna get a hint as to where I'm being invited?" You asked, and he shook his head, "Fine. What should I wear then?"

"Hmm... Something you won't overheat in," He said cryptically, and when you narrowed your eyes he only smirked. Scratching his face and placing a hand to rest over the back of the couch, he spoke up again, "Frankly, I just want to see you again," You blushed at his confession, "Marcus already contacted me," He announced, surprising you. His smile was gone, and he looked up at the rafters on his ceiling,

"Seriously?" He nodded, "That fast?"

"A group of his enforcers didn't report back in the morning and their bodies were found dead in the streets (Y/N)," He reminded you with a sigh, "He wants to talk to me,"

"Good luck," You wished him,

"Yeah... But I look forward to seeing you afterwards," You blushed again and looked away this time, "I'm serious,"

"I will, I'll be there," You assured, "Just wish you'd tell me where we're doing,"

"Be patient. I think you'll like it," He said, and you smiled softly at his words. Be patient. That's what you've been doing for the past year and still, here you were on his couch, talking casually. Some days, you just wanted to grab his face and confess all those feelings you kept locked inside your chest. It was frustrating, not being able to express the love and desire you felt for him, but patience ensured you'd reconnect safely again. Patience, and slow progress...

How much longer could you take this? Time would tell.

[fabricated-misslieness]

pairing: chūya nakahara x lazy male reader

req: yes | wc: 1.87k | cw: nsfw, size difference, praise kink, biting, blood, dirty talk, belly bulging | minors dni

anon: Hi! I was hoping I could get a smut for chuuya if you could make it kinda of a part two from the other chuuya fic u have and if u can could u add a size kink and a praise kink if so thank you so much!

a/n: you thought the demon was a himbo, ha!

"You know these don't tend to last long." You send the man pushing you against the wall a wink, making sure he knows you're still top. Chūya chuckles in response.

"I'm prepared for that." Chūya gives you a smirk. You don't know it, but he doesn't mean it. He hopes it is only your sheer amount of power that attracts him to you, but he knows it's not true. He really isn't that keen on having this be a one time thing. He rather it be a long, loving relationship, keep it lasting for as long as he can; if he has to teach you commitment, he will.

You raise an eyebrow for a minute, judging his composure. "Mkay.. good. You need me to lift you, though? You're quite a way down."

Chūya huffs and rolls his eyes. With you, he's heard something along those lines about a million times. He can't control his height and he certainly can't control yours. Jeez, it's as if you were a giant. If you and him stood next to each other, he'd look like a child, not that he was that much taller than a child anyway.

"Oh shut up with that… but yes." As much as he didn't want to admit it, even though it was very clear, he couldn't kiss you from 'all the way down there'.

"Thought so." It's the shit eating grin on your face that makes him regret this. "Hold on to the horns will ya? You'll need the support."

"Doesn't bother ya?" Chūya asks, doing so anyway. They feel rather tough, like how he imagined crocodile scales to feel. Your wings, on the other hand, weren't as he'd imagined them to be. They felt like leather, despite the fact they looked like rubber. He couldn't fathom how hot they'd be in summer.

You shake your head, in turn moving his arms. "Nah. Anyway, what do you think about the fangs?" You momentarily open your mouth wider to show him. "Would you rather I don't bite you or I do?" They're not as sharp as say, a vampire or a werewolf, but they could definitely puncture.

"Maybe test them first?" You know, what he meant was that you bite his finger, or something, not his neck. It definitely stung, but it hadn't punctured. He was sure if you hadn't controlled your strength, he'd bleed. He hissed at the pain. Though it was nothing he couldn't handle, you'd taken him by surprise.

"My bad, precious." That was a new nickname. "What do you think? Did you like it? No judge if you're into it." The mention of a biting link made him think of some past lover with said kink. It sort of made him jealous.

"What if I find your sweet spot? Would that persuade you?" You bite his neck, finding the spot that made him moan. "Knew it. They're usually there." He hated the way you rubbed your past lovers in his face. In time, he'd make you forget. He was sure of that.

"Well?"

"Okay.."

"Would you look at that?" Chūya couldn't focus on anything right now, the pleasure, and pain, was too much. You would pester him for how long he took to adjust for sure. "I'm balls deep in you and I can actually see it." He hadn't registered that first part until now.

He looked down to see his stomach clearly bulging. He laughed at the sight of it. You were really a giant, in more ways than one. It was kind of.. hot though. The size difference was already turning him on, at this point it was a lot.

"Sexy." You remark, licking your lips. If it weren't for your dick, he would want that tongue in him.. again. "Can you even talk right now?"

Chūya chuckles, fixing you with a playful look before pulling you down by the horns. "Of course I can." He whispers in your ear.

"Good." You move the slightest bit, though to him it felt more than that, which urges a moan from his throat. "Although I'd like to see you try when I fuck you with no mercy."

Chūya is flustered to no end, but as the competitive guy he is, he can't just back down, even with your dick inside of him. "Is that what you say to everybody? 'Fuck you with no mercy'? How about 'fuck you 'till you're begging for hell?'"

You smirk, shaking your head to mess with his arms. His hands were surely indented with the pattern of your horns by now. "I'll keep that in mind."

"Are you ready now?" You were going to nag him about the time, just like he'd predicted. "You've been sitting on it for so long you could call it cockwarming. But maybe you're into that, haven't discussed the deets just yet."

"What can I do?" You laugh. "Your dick is big, you said so yourself."

"Then the details. What do you like?"

"P-Praise." He's a little nervous to admit it, what with the fact he acts like a tough cookie. He had to build up some courage for this moment.

You shift a bit as you think about it. All of a sudden, you start moving slowly. It's still quite a bit painful for Chūya, but your praise makes up for it. "You're doing good, baby." Your rough voice along with the way you grip his hips with your claws sends chills down his spine. "Just a bit more."

You chuckle, toying with the idea in your mind. You thrust a bit more, barely even containing yourself with how horny you are, before stopping to ask. "Like that?"

He had bitten his lips to keep his moans from coming out; he'd nearly drawn blood "Yeah, yeah, just like that." If his eyes weren't shut so tightly he'd be so much more flustered by the look you're giving him.

"Think you're ready yet?" The impatience was clear in your voice.

"Mm, yeah."

Your thrusts are slow at first, as a precaution. It was a wonder how you hadn't started going fast, though. You'd been in him for so long without moving that the impatience and anticipation were building up.

"You can go faster now." You smile, but you don't speed up, which confuses him. He was sure you wanted more, so why didn't you give him more?

"How much faster?" It's only now that he realizes it's a cheeky grin. 

Your sultry eyes seem to enchant him, making him unable to think properly; well, that and the thrusting. "I don't know."

"My terms, then." He doesn't like the sound of that. Luckily, you catch onto his uneasy look in time to reassure him, but your words don't do much. "Don't worry, you'll be just fine."

There's no warning after that. Your thrusts are quick and hard, just how you like them though only a little less than normal. After all, you'd gotten from, say, a 1 to a 7. Since when did you start calling your thrusts like a vibrator?

"You're doing good, baby!" He didn't know why, he did but he didn't know now, but he thought you'd sound more sarcastic.

His grip on your horns loosen and his arms feel weak. Just how vulnerable did you make him feel? He couldn't hold back from letting out a loud, high-pitched moan. It caused you to laugh, which he hated since he knew you were about to tease him. "High-pitched, just for me?"

He rolled his eyes at you, maybe a little bit because of pleasure, responding just as quick. "I mean you– oh! Holy shit!" He was interrupted by his own moans.

"What was that you were going to say?"

"Straying from– ah shit! Shit shit shit!" He repeated. That chuckle of yours made him realize you'd been hitting him hard on purpose to tease him. "Straying far from," He stops himself from moaning by biting his lips momentarily. "p-praise here."

You almost pout when he finishes his sentence, but you nod. "Right, sorry, precious~" You basically purr. “You’re taking my cock so well. Are you ready for more?”

“What?” You’d only just changed pace, so why would you- “Ah! Fuck me..” You hadn’t even given him time to answer, and you didn’t mean to either. This pace was the fastest, and roughest, Chūya had ever felt before, and god, did he love it. He could barely even form words, apart from curse words that were oh so familiar. The only thing that left his mouth were moans and he couldn’t even bite his lips.

“Mm, can’t talk anymore?” You weren’t really good at praise, were you? Well, it was new to you, since most of your lovers turned masochists at the sight of you. You didn’t make them, they just did. smug hoe

His arms, tired and a little sore, fall from your horns and grip your wings, which are wrapped around him. It causes you to hiss, but it’s a mere feeling in the back of your head from all the pleasure you’re getting. “Careful with those, darl.” You say with a chuckle. “You can’t break them in your state right now, but they still hurt.”

“S-Sorry.” He manages to say, continuing with moans afterward. They’re high pitched, most of them, as much as he tries to at least make them a little lower. 

“Oh? A word?” Your smirk is as much a nightmare as it is a dream. He wants to punch it off your face but also kiss it off your lips. “Right, right, praise. You take me in so well~” Chūya just barely manages a laugh.

“Ah, fuck!” Chūya shouts. He can feel himself getting closer and closer.

You smirk, moving to his neck, kissing and nipping. Your fangs sting his neck everytime you bite down, but you make sure to control yourself. Though sooner or later you’ll bite him and draw blood, it’s only inevitable.

“Go on, baby. Come loose for me, let me feel your seed on my abs.” You move to his ear, whispering and licking the lobe. 

Your words are what sends him over the edge of bliss. His seed spills all over the both of you, which is a turn on for sure; it moves with his constantly bulging belly. 

You close your eyes when you feel yourself coming closer. Instinctively, you move to his neck, giving him a harsh bite, which makes Chūya groan. You couldn’t control yourself from not biting him, even when his neck is already littered with other marks. Blood drips from the wound, two small holes.

It’s only when you go over the edge that you apologize. You move off of him, pulling him on top of you instead. He snuggles into your body, hissing in pain. “Sorry.” You move your wings to wipe the blood away.

“It’s fine… well, not really, but eh.”

You chuckle, keeping one wing on the wound and the other over the top of you. “I’ll make it up to you later.”

The promise of another time is reassuring, whether it be sexual or not, though he rather it be a date. He likes to know he has a little bit of a chance.

[shotorozu]

𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤

𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔲 𝔥𝔦𝔱𝔬𝔰𝔥𝔦 ᥊ 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: you find yourself in a bar that you and your ex used to go to regularly. the local bartender calls your ex- shinsou hitoshi; thinking you guys are still together. 

𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗮𝗴𝘀: angst to fluff (happy ending), sfw, pro hero au (aged up), drinking (alcohol mentions and intake) ex to lovers, minor todomomo (not the center of this fic) reader is in the top 5, some swearing. 

𝗹𝗲𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗱: [Y/N = your name, L/N = last name, H/N = hero name, ] f! reader, quirk not mentioned. 

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀: i also did this trope on ao3 with todomomo, so i better not see people think i plagiarized them because.. that’s literally me lol. also! i was very conflicted, bc i also wanted to do this with shouto but since I already have 2-3 fics in the making, i went with hitoshi (but let me know if you wanna see shouto’s version.) 

word count to be added when im not sleep deprived

　　　　　　　　

　　　　　　　　˚✧₊⁎⁎⁺˳✧༚

You swivel down another shot down your throat, not caring of the burn in your nose, nor do you care about the smell of the alcohol. 

You’re never like this, this is not the best representation of yourself, no. This is not who you are as a person, and the way your former classmates look at you with concern when you chug down another shot shows how unusual this is to them.

“Take it easy..” Momo pats your back, and you exhale heavily, putting down the glass. Everyone is certain that you’ll obtain some serious hangover, almost to the point that you’d have to take the morning off to treat your hangover. They’re aware that you’re not this careless, since you're in the top 5 after all. 

But they let you be momentarily, but why you may ask?

Because this is your way of coping a breakup with your boyfriend of 3 and a half years, Shinsou Hitoshi. They’re aware on how hurt you really are, and to be real- they were the ones that asked you to come out with them tonight to distract you. 

“They’ve been going at it for a while, it’s almost concerning.” Tsuyu comments, as she tends to a slightly tipsy Mina, holding her so she doesn’t fall face first into the floor. 

The least they could do is let you be, while you're not totally blacked out.

The local bartender- Maki, looks at you with concern when you order another shot, yet they still give it to you (with the slightest hesitation) since you’re such a good friend to her. (Your rank makes you very respectable, it’s almost intimidating! but your casual friend ship with the bar tender says other wise.) 

But on the contrary, you'd know when you’ve reached the limit, and you’d probably know when they’d start refusing your requests of another shot. 

One by one, their friends depart from the table, either they were too drunk to even handle it so they were brought home, or something came up- everyone could agree that they all had some sort of worry towards their dear friend’s very out of character coping mechanism. 

“I have to go soon,” Momo sighs, when she receives a text from Todoroki- though it’s very obvious that she’s still very concerned for you, considering that she’s the only friend left. “Please take care of Y/N, Maki-san.” 

Maki nods at your black haired friend, and the creation hero looks at you one last time before leaving the bar. 

Lifting your head, your words are slurred as you request for another shot, which seems like the umpteenth time that you requested for a shot. The concerned bartender still attends to your needs, yet- she’s contemplating of calling someone if you ask for another. 

Likewise, you finish that shot in a moment, and you slump down on the table. Eyelids fluttering slowly as your laughter is filled with intoxication, your cheeks are warm from being inebriated from the intake of alcohol. 

You don’t notice how your concerned bartender dials up a number, requesting for them to pick your drunken state. 

     »»————-　➴　————-««

“Did you know the word bed is shaped like one?” 

It’s now past midnight, and you’re mouthing off about something random, the train of thought is endless (but it’s more like a shower thought ramble.) Your fists are deep into your hair- holding your head up so it doesn't hit the table, meanwhile Maki paces back and forth- still tending to other requests from the very few customers left. 

“Now that you’ve mentioned it, yeah.” They answer absentmindedly, “Man, I haven't seen you in nearly 4 months! it’s been a while. You knows how to hold your alcohol so frankly, this is the first time I’ve seen this side of you!” 

“Oh really?” You slur, continuing on to spout out purposeless words.

The bartender’s response is a total blur, words turning into background noises, and a part of you is lucky to still be conscious and still functioning (yet it's barely) 

“..But you hold it well for--” 

You’re also very lucky that you’re a little too under the influence to even register the name.

You didn't know you’d take this breakup with him harshly. The most you were expecting was just.. crying while eating ice cream. 

But no, it was an utter shit hole. 

The door busts open, and the bartender’s expression seems to brighten up “Ah, there you are!” 

You grumble, the bar’s lights causing your eyes to sting- and your head hurts too. You might need some aspirin later.. you close your eyes shut. The bartender is chatting with the unknown person, and frankly- you just wished you didn’t intoxicate yourself this much.

“Y/N,” 

The baritone voice is almost sufficient in sobering you up. Turning to the familiar voice, you see the tall figure, sporting bedraggled purple hair. 

It’s Shinsou Hitoshi. A reason why you’re in such a mess, coping with a breakup in the first place. 

You almost fall off your chair in sudden revelation to the appearance of your ex lover. It was almost like.. your drunken state was making you see things- a possible hallucination maybe? it has to be that. Maybe it’s the side effect of the growing headache?? What was in that shot?

“Ugh, I must be crazy,” You wipe your cheek from slob, your head throbbing from the growing headache. The weary purple head raises an eyebrow, and the bartender is confused by the sudden tension. It's abnormal, alright.

The reason why you broke up was because of his lack of self care. 

Again, it’s not like he was being a shithead and cheating on you, or being a total prick of a boyfriend and neglecting you, and it’s definitely not the other way around either. 

It was probably the opposite. He'd neglect himself for days on end, not caring about himself, and not caring about his own being. It was.. not what you wanted at all. 

You figured just because the both of you are rising up heroes, and also adults- he would’ve gotten a grip of not neglecting himself. 

But even habits like that don’t get old. 

“Hitoshi- seriously, when was the last time you’ve took a breather?” growing slightly irritated by Shinsou’s continuous neglect of his own self care, and also the fact that he’s clinging onto you 24/7. 

“It doesn’t matter.” He shrugs, pinching your cheek. Heck, you should be glad he wants to be with you for the majority of the days. But you can’t tolerate him when he’s constantly complaining about being tired, although making little to no efforts in taking care of himself. Heck- his dark circles got even darker- how is that even possible?

“’Toshi, it really does. You can’t neglect self care.” Your brows furrow when he chooses to ignore your words. “You’re not listening to me.” 

“You should be glad that I want to spend time with you.” 

It stung. What the hell did he even mean by that..?? scoffing, and slightly offended, you reply “That’s not the main issue.” you cross your arms “We’ve talked about this before, remember?” You reason out, giving him the nice benefit of the doubt. You'd like to be civil here. 

He ignores you once more, and you can actually feel the irritation grow within you. “I don’t want to be the reason why you neglect yourself.” 

“I’m really not, okay?” He retorts back, “Why do you always have to bring up things that don't matter?” 

Aggitated, you snap back “Wh- we’re talking about you! Hitoshi, we’ve talked about this- and you said you’d work on it! do my words mean nothing to you?” Hitoshi’s gaze flickers up, only staring at you, as if it was his own way of judging you and your intent. 

And that’s how it erupted into a full fight, and into your eventual breakup. 

You didn’t know how expressing your genuine concern for him blended into him saying things he’d never mean in his entire life. He doesn’t stop you when you walk out, not saying a thing at all

There was no verbal breakup. It was just.. there. 

The unknowing bartender interrupts the nonverbal tension, “I thought you’d be a lot happier, y’know.” 

“We-”

“..’ll get going now, thanks again.” Before you know it, Hitoshi’s hooking your arm around his shoulders— as he walks to the door, leaving the very familiar bar.

It’s awkward, surely. You’re not sure why he was there, and you’re not so sure as to why he decided to come to your aid in the first place. If Maki called him, and he was requested to come to you in question, then he could’ve just..

“..sent someone else,” You mumble. You reek heavily of alcohol, and your skin is undeniably warm. Frankly, he doesn’t remember the last time you were like this— was it the first time you had a drink? it was years back at this point.

You’re pretty.

Beautiful,

That’s one thing that hasn’t change. Surely, what changed things was the fact that he said some.. horrible things— and refused to even listen to your concerns, which ultimately cause your breakup. His relationship status changed into some lonely and young hero, and his heart ached in different ways.

But you’re still very beautiful, to him.

Doesn’t matter if you’re all dolled up for a hero interview, or a mess on a off saturday. You’re still beautiful.

But now— he’s focused on your words, and he’s taken aback when you continue to speak, causing the both of you to stop in the middle of the sidewalk.

“You’ve coulda asked s-someone else to pick.. me up.” Your words are slurred, a normal side effect of being drunk. However, seeing your ex has surely sobered you up.

“That’s true,” Shinsou moves to continue walking, so you guys weren’t standing on the middle of the side walk on a cold early morning.

“What are you even doing at a bar at 1am?” He changes the subject, but you’re still caught on to your previous question. “You didn’t answer my question at all, meanie.” Her grip is firm, so there’s no way of budging it.

His laugh lacks humor, yet he feels obligated to answer her. Or else they’d be stuck on the sidewalk, due to her hero grip.

“It didn’t feel right,”

“Yeah sure.” You grumble, “Because you suddenly care.”

“I’ve always cared, Y/N.”

“Really?” You say, not really believing him anyway. “You seemed pretty sure with your words back then to care.” Despite being toxicated, your words have undertones of venom

“You may say that, but.. I’ve always cared.”

“Then why the hell did you say all of that back then, huh?” Overwhelmed by seeing your ex, who you still fucking loved by the way— tears grow at your eyes. “If you’re lying, stop it.” You say, literally not in the mood to be lied to right now.

You’re literally being carried by your ex, while intoxicated, while also having a throbbing headache.

“I’m not.” Hitoshi answers firmly. A certain edge grows in his throat, and he hates it.

“Yes you are,” Your voice is now wobbly, it’s really just a mix of your overwhelming emotion, as well as your drunken state. “You would’ve told me that weeks ago!”

You were always right, and he knows it. Ever since from the last moment you shared with him, your words were just.. nothing but the sheer truth. Yet, he’s only hurt you— because of his denial.

He knows you’re right, and he knows that he had his habits of neglecting his own care. Though that’s why he decided to change, that you were in fact- correct all this time.

And he was just an ass to even admit it.

“You’re right,” His fists crumple, grip tight as he fights his sudden urge to break. “You were always right. I’ve always cared, and you’ve always cared about me. Yet I was worried of changing, not being around you just so that I could take care of something that’s not really important-”

“But you are, Hitoshi,” You sob, nearly collapsing onto the ground— “You matter so much, yet you don’t even see it, and if I’m going to contribute to your destructive ways— then...”

“How could you? If you don’t care about my words, then do you care about yourself..?”

Shinsou sighs, bending down to meet your level— you’re gasping and sobbing into his chest, tears angrily running down your cheeks.

“I know, kitten, and I’m sorry.” Wiping your tears with his thumb, he speaks once more. “That’s why.. I’ve thought about what you’ve said, and I decided to take care of myself a bit more, I want you to know that.. I do care.”

You glance up at him, the city lights luminating his face— enough for you to see the adorning expression he’s sporting.

“..really?” You speak, in a nearly hush tone, again— you’re still very drunk, and overwhelmed with emotions. This could’ve been passed off as a fever dream, and you could’ve been normal with it.

“Yes, Y/N.” His mouth perks up into a small smile.

“Then.. would you allow me to start over with you again?”

Pushing against Hitoshi, you envelope him with your arms— it’s almost cliché and dramatic, the way you collapse into his arms like it’s the last day on earth.

But.. Shinsou’s glad he has you again. Finally a chance to prove that he’s changed.

ーーーーーーー

BONUS

You sit on the counter of your apartment, hands covering your face— as a way to shield your eyes from the prodding sunlight that peaks from the windows.

“This should help,” Hitoshi hands you a cool glass of water, “The way you hold your alcohol is terrible,” You chug down the glass of water, and you take a jab at him with your feet.

He hisses at the sudden attack, and only chuckles, “You’re mad because it’s true kitten,” He teases

“Shut up,” You draw him in with your leg, setting the glass down, “Just kiss me already,”

And so he does, pressing your lips against his— savoring the sweet warm moment he’s been practically starved of for nearly 4 months.

He pulls back, his expression showcasing that he’s tasting the aftermath.

“Ew, you taste like beer.”

You glare at him, and take another light jab, “Of course I do, Idiot.”

Despite saying all of that, he pulls you in once more.

　　　　　　　˚✧₊⁎❝᷀ົཽ ❝᷀ົཽ⁎⁺˳✧༚

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading (literally the first fic i’ve ever posted, so y’all BETTER like it or i’ll 💀)

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing

do not plagiarize my work :)) (literally don’t, it’s 3:26am on a tuesday.)

[imonthinice]

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 12/?

Word Count: 4.4k

Author’s Note: Y/N - Your Name, A/N - Any Name (Your Best friend’s name)

God idk what i’m doing with this but i’m liking it lmao

next one might honestly be smut idk

Warnings: Violence, Swearing, Description of Blood, Gets heated, hints at trauma, no beta bitch we die like Jason Todd

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

Y/N walked through the streets of Gotham, which were once bustling with people, but now were quiet with the occasional hooker, she had caught the city as an unlively hour, where it seemed to sleep the night away while the vigilantes of the area watched it like their lives depended on it. In some ways it did, the stories they would tell when being interviewed were horrific sometimes, but Y/N figured a decent amount of it was for dramatization, to keep the people of Gotham off of the streets to protect them all from it.

The question was always protect them from what, and they never answered. So, it never kept the people of Gotham at bay from the streets at night, and had Y/N’s car not been towed, she would have been driving home in the safe, secluded area of her car, not the vast wilderness of the streets of Gotham.

She looked up at the sky to see one of the virgate boys using a grappling hook to fly to the other building, which was such a sight to behold for someone who never witnessed a superhero beyond Superman at home. She wished and longed to know more about the vigilante, but didn’t dwell or dote on that man, because she didn’t need to.

Something told her that he was watching though, tracing every step she made to make sure she got home in one piece. She thought she was crazy, her life didnt matter more than anyone else in Gotham. He’s not following me, why would he? she thought, Even though I’m dating Jason Todd, they probably don’t know Jason, so my life doesn’t mean much more to them than any one of the hookers along this street. I’m overthinking it.

The walk home took two hours, she left Jason’s at 4am just to find herself back home at 6am, bright and early as the sun rose, ready to greet the day and all it had in store for everyone. But the things it had in store for Y/N was a class and if she was lucky, cuddling with Jason. Nothing more, nothing less.

She would open her front door, unscathed from the journey home, except maybe for a few callouses on her feet, it was the last time she wouldn't pay for more than a day of parking, that’s for sure. Heels were not the shoes you wanted for a two-hour walk home in the Autumn cold, but they were what she had.

She thought about what she was going to do next, and the first thought she had was to shower. Not because she needed to, but because she wanted to nurse the terrible headache she had and to think some things through. What she normally did in the shower.

She wanted so much more from so much of her life. the main offender of seemingly not being enough for her was Jason. Not because she didn’t want more, but because she craved more from him. He was injured, so she wouldn’t get much more rom him for the time being, and it stung a little for her. She just wanted him, maybe sexually, maybe in a more romantic setting or maybe just on her couch on a Thursday afternoon. It was all three of those options and she knew it.

She pulled out of the shower and looked at the time, 6:50am. Okay, she thought, little more time than I wanted to spend in the shower, but I guess the universe had different plans for me today. What else do you have for me, universe? And how much of you plan involves Jason?

She would open her phone after quickly getting dressed. While she still cared for her appearance, she didn’t want to dress like she owned a law firm every day, so she didn’t. Just black jeans and a black top and she felt like a million bucks. 

Just some quick outfit inspo. I like doing these a lot. I think fashion is funky :))

Artemis had sent her a message asking where she was at around 4am, she wondered why the time, but she then remembered that Artemis’ boyfriend worked with Dick Grayson, who was Jason’s brother, who worked most nights until radical hours of the night. The chances that he saw her on her two-hour walk home was high, but the chances that that had also made it back to Jason was higher. She knew she was in for it.

Hey sorry, I was at Jason’s. Fell asleep in his arms the whole shebang. And yeah, that was me who screamed the yo momma joke at the press. It was super childish, I know, but I don’t care. Those fucks are sucking my life force out of me and harassing my boyfriend, even your boyfriend.

She would then look at the articles calling her a gold digger and worth-nothing childish insulter of the press. She laughed. If the press wanted a fight from her, she was more than willing to oblige and load the canons. 

She didn’t know how to fight back that well, since it was a mainly verbal fight, and she barely even knew how to  fight physically, hence all the running and non-confrontational arguments she had had to the press.

And like fucking clockwork, Jason texted her.

Did you walk home alone or are my brothers lying bastards?

I walked. I knew someone saw me, fuck.

Why did you walk home? I thought you drove here?

I did, but we spent more than 12 hours together Jason. I didn’t buy enough hours, suddenly my car was being towed.

You could have asked for a ride home from Alfred! He would have in a heartbeat.

I was going to! But  I got distracted and it all became a blur and suddenly I was part of the way home in the dark by myself!

What if you had gotten hurt?

Well, I saw one of the vigilantes of the city on the rooftops, I’m sure if I screamed they would have seen me. They always do see that stuff.

So, your car got towed huh?

Yeah, I don’t know when I’ll be able to pay it off. It’s not exactly like money my parents give me should go to my car getting towed because I got fucked over by seeing my boyfriend. 

You’ll figure it out. Sorry about the car, that’s got to suck fucking ass.

You think? I’m stuck taking the fuckin’ subway till I get my car back. I hate the subway, too many people. Far too many people. Too many eyes. It gets stressful really quickly. Might just walk every where honestly, I can’t deal with the eyes of strangers.

But you’re a C-list celebrity.

Internet is different. I can just block the bad eyes and move on with my life, you should see my block list now that some people are connecting my name to the girl who flipped off the press, thank god Twitter has a fuckin block feature.

You should really just meet my family so you don’t have to run away before they get home, would probably cause you a lot less financial stress, Y/N.

I’ll think about it.

You should think a little harder about it. I don’t want you to get your car impounded ‘cause you’re seeing me, why did you even park in pay-to-park?

Did you not see the massive mob trying to get to you? It was impossible for me to even try to pull into the driveway. Hence why I’m being insulted, you know, ‘cause I yelled at the press to get them to leave me alone. I fucking hate the press, you’re stabbed, severely injured last time they got information, and they’re harassing me, asking me what I like to do on the weekends.

Fucking vultures. Yeah, I’ve seen that. I’ve read the articles. But that’s the press for you, absolute trash and spitting bullshit in everyway.

Fucking hate the press, that’s for damn sure. Despise them. I won’t ever change that, even if, knock on wood, we break up.

Praying we don’t break up so I can see you lose your shit at the press when you’re bored.

She would get up to go make some coffee, since it was closer to 7:20am and if her roommate woke up, she could just tell her to get up anyway.

The press can suck my dick. she said.

You have a dick?

Oh yeah. Massive. 20ft long. It probably won’t even fit all the vultures.

Oh my god, that’s not as big as mine.

lmfao is it now?

Oh yeah.

Nice.

Anyway, my brothers are staying home from school today,  I think they’re making me play Resident Evil 8 with them? You know that game?

Of course. Everyone in that game is infinitely hot.

Are you bi? 

I don’t know. Haven't thought that far ahead to actually label myself. I just like people. Sometimes it’s men, sometimes it’s women. But you have to agree when you see them all. That game came out when I was still in  high school, so I’ve played the entire thing. My phone background is actually one of the characters.

Which one?

I’ll show you if I come over tonight.

My brothers might be in my room, though.

Okay, but, RE8 is an amazing game. So, worth it.

You won’t meet them normally but I pull out a game you love and you’re down?

I’m very easy to convince.

You still have notes to write when you come over though.

Oh yeah, I was probably going to have to come over both ways, just because I need those notes and you do too.

Do you not own a printer?

I barely even own a laptop, I’m waiting for my old one to come in the mail. 

How do you even manage?

With a whole lot of will and spite, anything is possible.

And that’s when her discord group chat @’ed her. She was on Do Not Disturb because she was Jason, and apparently they missed her.

Y/N! C’mere. One said.

Yes? Whatduhya want nerds?

We’ve decided to hold a fake internet wedding between you and Christopher. Another said.

A what.

We’re getting married!

Sometimes I wish I never left Metropolis and then I remember you fucks live there. Why are we doing this? You do know I have a boyfriend right? She asked them.

I don’t know, we’re bored and we miss you. We can have a bachelorette party in Gotham, if you want.

I’m this close to going back on DND.

The group chat was made way back when they had all first met in grade 9 and had been active ever since. They all had stayed in the city when they graduated though, but since Y/N received a scholarship, fully paid for, she took the opportunity and jumped.

They were some of her closest friends, even if they lived in a different city to her now, even if they were all busy with school, even if she was busy with school and a boyfriend, A lot of her life wouldn’t be complete without her crack friends in her hometown.

They had all ben partying like crazy while she was gone, and if she wasn’t so hung up in her own life, she’d probably be down there with them. 

Before you do, can you please explain why you’re screaming at the press, lmao.

Because fuck the press, dude. Why else? 

What did they do to you?

Have you seen the recent articles?

That’s true.

She laughed and finished her coffee. Jason had not responded yet, she assumed his brothers were either checking on him or they had started the game. It was around 8am when A/N finally left her room.

“I thought you were staying with Jason?”

“I was, but then I remembered he has like 9 siblings and I’m not about to meet them all. Then I walked home.”

“You walked?”

“Car got towed.”

“Fuck, can you afford the bill? I can’t.”

“Nope.”

“Guess we’re going to take the subway for a while, huh.”

She sighed and put her cup in the sink, “At least you don’t have school to go to and your lover comes to meet you, I have shit to do and places to be,” she frowned, “Inconvenient.”

“Could you borrow money from Jason’s dad?”

“I don’t borrow money from family, it’s hard enough for me to accept the money my parents send me.”

“I know it is, when’s your class?”

“3pm, I’ll be leaving at 12pm though, because the subway is unreliable.”

“This is going to be a hard hit for us.”

“Well, it’s not like it’s fucking your credit. Mine’s tanking.”

“You’ll pull through it.”

-------------------------------------------

She got onto the subway at 12:30pm. She really hated the way it was running. The people, the faces, the staring eyes of unwanted attention. People knew who she was and she hated it. She didn’t like the attention, she just liked the fucking with people. She wanted to get off the subway the minute she got on.

She eventually couldn’t take it and got off a few stops away, there was still a substantial walk towards the college, but she knew it would be. She even brought a leather jacket with her so that she could walk if she couldn’t take it anymore.

And there she was, in the busy streets of Gotham, walking to her college. Barely aware of the people who did stare at her, because she just kept walking, lost in her thought but aware of the people in her trail, the cross walks and the lights she was waiting for occasionally. She just kept walking until Artemis met up with her,

“Hey! I didn’t know you were walking to school today,” Artemis said.

“Oh! I didn’t want to, my car got towed though.”

“Your car got towed? That sucks so much. Well, we’re going the same way, so I’ve decided I’m going to walk with you, you get no say.”

“Of course. I was going to ask if you wanted to,” she laughed, “It’s more fun with a friend anyway, Art.”

“So, how are things with you and Jason, I’m legally obliged to ask as one of his friends.”

“Well, we made it official if that’s the kind of thing you want to hear,” she laughed again, “I’m sure it’s the answer Dick will eat up.”

“You’re right about that one. Dick’s a sucker for a romantic story, you should write one, since you write. He’d probably read it all.”

“Well, that would be fun, but I still don’t have my laptop.”

“You could use Jason’s?” Artemis suggested..

“Nah. It’ll be fine,” she said, “I’ll manage.”

“Aren’t you collecting notes for him for your psychology class?”

“I am, it’s not like he can go anywhere. I actually told him he’d need to walk eventually so that it’s not a learning curve when he’s healed.”

“That’s what all of us are telling him too, he’s a stubborn man, good luck with that one,” Artemis laughed, “He’s always been the stubborn friend. Worse than Will, actually, and Will is really bad with being stubborn.”

“It’s fine,” she laughed, “If you asked any of my Metropolis friends they’d say the same about me.”

“I bet you were quite the wild child in your heyday back in your city,” Artemis laughed, “I hate Metropolis.”

“Who doesn’t? It’s so crowded.”

“Uh, Clark doesn’t. He thrives there, no idea why, he grew up in Smallville. If anyone should be uncomfortable with Metropolis it should be the small-city country boy, but I guess it’s his thing.”

“I forget you know everyone.”

“We know a lot of people, are you’re slowly being let into our massive circle of very well-known people. Welcome to the group, I guess,” she laughed, “You'll either hate or love the fame that comes from this.”

“Well, if its paparazzi and press, I think I’ll hate it.”

“I can promise you right now that it’s not all paparazzi and press, we haven’t been bothered today, probably because we are on the move.”

“You shouldn’t say that, you’ll jinx it.”

“I know a lot about not jinxing it, but that’s a story for another time,” Y/N noticed that when Artemis said this her eyes glazed over and she looked upset.

“You don’t ever have to talk to me about something you’re not ready to talk about,” Y/N reassured her.

“Hey, the trauma makes me funny.”

“Two can play that game.”

They would ramble on for the rest of the walk to their college. Nothing really of substance, just getting to know each other further. She was glad she found a friend in Artemis, it would have sucked if the two of them didn’t get along, but with each word they exchanged, they had so much fun.

She even told Artemis about that time she played Katherine Howard in her school’s budget play of Six - The Musical. She was proud of the riffs she was able to do, but she didn’t talk about it often. She was never the type of brag about her achievements, no matter how amazing they were.

But Artemis and Y/N parted ways and Y/N went to her class and wrote the same, boring, scribbly and barely legible notes. She figured eventually she’d need nicer handwriting, but did she want to work on it? No.

When she finished, she saw Artemis and who she could only assume to be Wally, at Artemis’ class doors. She waved to Artemis, before Artemis called her over.

“Y/N! Hey, I would ask how class is, but this is Wally,” she gestured to the red-head boy beside her, and Y/N held out her hand to shake Wally’s.

“Hi, Wally.”

“Y/N. It’s nice to meet you since Jason can’t shut up about you and my girlfriend likes you a lot.”

“Well that's sweet of you Artemis. You’re just so in love with me,” Y/N joked.

“Girl. You know it,” Artemis joked back.

“You two already have a close bond? That’s impressive,” Wally said, “Never seen anyone win over any of my friends this quickly,” he muttered.

They joked for a little while longer, just getting to know Wally before she had to go, she had to get to Jason’s.

The walk was a while away, so she went and sat on a park bench for a minute to check her phone, Jason had texted her.

Hey baby, are you coming over?

I am, yes. I actually just met Wally.

You met Wally and I wasn’t there to see it? C’mon.

Artemis introduced us! Go yell at her.

Oh. Never mind. I won’t do that.

Ha! Scared of her?

Maybe a little, she can be scary, okay?

You can’t tell but I’m laughing at you.

Dhmu.

That’s fine, I’ll just go hang out with Alfred and not you. He seems like he would be spiteful like me.

That’s unfair.

I thought you said don’t hit me up?

Fuck.

Checkmate.

I am upset.

No you’re not.

No I’m not.

She would walk down the street further, maybe within a couple steps to reach the Manor, when a man dragged her into an alleyway. She yelped.

“Uh, hello? Can I help you?” she asked, pretending she wasn’t terrified.

“How much would Bruce give me for you?” the attacker mumbled before he tried to knock her to the ground, but she had another plan.

He grabbed her, put his face close to hers, and she head-butted him, he would stumble back, and she started running to the Manor.

“Come here you fucking bitch!” he screamed. She could feel her nose bleeding as she ran and ran, the security saw her and pulled her into the gateway before drawing their guns and urging her to run to the steps of the Manor.

And she ran. The security at the door saw her and let her in, and yelled for Alfred.

“What is this nonsense, oh,” Alfred paused when he saw the blood running out of Y/N’s nose, “Miss Y/N, what happened to you?” he asked before grabbing her hand and pulling her into the entry-way bathroom and opening a first-aid kit.

“Okay so, what happened was I was walking to the Manor because my car got towed right? And this fucking bastard dude pops out from an alleyway and pulls me into it, asks some bullshit about how much Bruce would pay for me, when he grabbed me and tried to knock me down, when I head-butted him and started running,” she said, completely unphased.

Alfred didn’t respond to her and started to stop the bleeding when Bruce called for him, “In the entry-way bathroom, Master Wayne!” he answered.

Bruce came around the corner and saw Alfred was already tending to Y/N, “Well, this is the event where I meet my son’s girlfriend, when she is bleeding and running from a strange man in an alleyway.”

“Heh, sorry,” she said and outstretched her hand to shake his, “It’s nice to finally meet you, Bruce.”

“I can tell you’re going to be quite the addition to this household,” he said as he took her hand and shook it, “As long as you’re okay.”

“I’m okay.”

“That’s good. I guess you can’t get mad at Jase for being a reckless man now.”

“I really can’t.”

“Alright, you should be good, Miss Y/N.”

“Thank you, Alfred. But you really didn’t have to.”

“I’ve been taking care of 5 boys and 3 girls since most of them were little, Miss Y/N. A little blood is really no big deal for me to handle.”

“That’s obvious.”

“You can go see the boys now, they’re going to ask you though,” Bruce said.

“I know.”

She walked to Jason’s room, hoping that he wouldn’t have all of his siblings in the room, he did though.

“Hey, Y/N- what the fuck happened to you?” Jason exclaimed when she opened the door.

“Oh great, all your siblings are here. Anyway, I guess,” she paused, taking in a big breath so she could run through the events quickly, “So I was walking here ‘cause my car got towed, right? When some fucking bastard man grabs me and yanks me into an alleyway and starts going off about how much Bruce will pay him to get me back or something,” she paused again, “And when he tried to knock me down by getting really close and personal to my face, like an idiot I should add, I head-butted him.”

“You did what?’

“I’m not done yet, met your dad when I actually had blood running out of my nose because that's just my fucking luck. Okay, now you can be disappointed in me,” she joked.

“I will say again, you did what?”

“Something stupid?” she said.

“You could say that again, my god, what went through your head?”

“Uh, nothing. Just survival. Fight or flight but I head-butted a man, and hi, everyone.”

“Hi, Y/N, I’m Dick,” Dick said, “You clearly are meant for Jason,” he joked, “That's something he would do.”

“Don’t encourage her, Dick!”

Stephanie got up and greeted her, “You know, Y/N, I always wanted a crazy sister,” she joked, “I’m Stephanie, the black-haired girl is Cass, and the red-head is Barbara.”

“Me too,” Cass hopped onto the joke.

“It’s something else when you meet the girl your brother is dating after she head-butted a man, apparently,” Y/N laughed, “I know it’s far-fetched-”

“Not really,” Tim cut her off, “You know Jason protected Will when they were attacked?”

“That’s Tim, by the way,” Dick said.

“So you can’t yell at me for head-butting a man!” Y/N joked at Jason while going to sit beside him, he slinged an arm around her shoulder and leant his head into her head.

“Well, you seem like a nice enough girl,” Barbara said, “Take away the reckless behavior, and you are lovely.”

“That is valid, to be honest. Not exactly the way you want to meet your brother’s girlfriend.”

“You think?” Jason asked, sarcastically.

“Ha ha.”

“See, she thinks I’m funny, why can’t you fucks?”

Y/N laughed and then asked Dick, who was playing RE8 at the time, staring at the photo of Donna Bentiveno, “She’s cute, isn’t she, Dick?”

“Have I been staring?”

“Let’s just say Angie is probably very pissed at you.”

“Oh! Whoops. There’s a point to this, I forgot.”

“I don’t blame you, I remember forgetting there was a point and the little bitch devil doll would attack you.”

“Language.”

“Oh no, you’re lame. Gross.”

“Excuse me?” Dick asked as the rest of the room erupted in laughter.

“Do you guys see why I like her now?” Jason asked.

“Uh no, she’s mean,” Dick said.

“You’re going to die if you don’t start paying attention, Dick,” Y/N said.

“Oh!” and he died.

“And that kids, is why we listen to the person who’s 100%’ed the game.”

------------------------------

Y/N and Jason would spend hours with his brothers and sisters until the sun started to set and they all scattered to their own rooms to  do their own things. you can’t keep a lot of kids in one room for so long.

Once everyone left, Y/N placed her hands on Jason and kissed him, she was actually able to be laid on his pillow, he was able to pin her to the bed. And they did just that. He was on top of her, using his one arm to prop himself up and using his other hand to touch her face.

Her hands found their way into his hair like they always did, she found a lot of joy in playing with his hair. Their tongues danced together, they never fought or anything, they just enjoyed each other when Jason let out a small moan and she let out a small laugh.

“Keep it in your pants, Tiger,” she joked, “You’re not fully healed.”

“You literally smashed your face into another man but I can’t moan when I kiss you?”

“Because I know you want more.”

“Hell yeah I do,” he said as he went back for more, actually using his strength to keep her to the bed, but she didn’t protest this time.

[slut-for-mothman]

Hell is For Children

Requested: Yes|No

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid

A/N: Special thanks to @oliverbrnch for editing this chapter and making it into what is is !!! I hope you all enjoy my first CM fanfiction !!!

Summary: After 13 years of trying to forget the man he was supposed to call his father, Spencer finds his phone riddled with messages from his father trying to catch up on "old times". He's met with criticism and shame when he reveals he has no want to talk to him. Everyone seems to think his father deserves a second chance. Everyone except for him. Aaron Hotchner. Logically it made no sense, Aaron had a kid of his own, would he not sympathize with his father for wanting to have a relationship with his son? Spencer finds comfort in the older man. Everytime his phone buzzes with a notification from William Reid, Aaron is always there to comfort him and distract him from the burning hole in his back pocket.

Chapter warnings: Angst, allusions to physical abuse. descriptions of violence and gore, swearing, and I think that's it.

Chapter One

December 16th, 5:15pm

"Hey son, I haven't seen or heard from you in a while. I hope you're doing okay."

Seeing that message was enough to twist the young doctors stomach in such intricate and painful knots he thought he might become violently ill.

"A while?" Spencer muttered to himself as he reread the message over and over. "it's been thirteen years, that's more than a while-"

A second message interrupted his train of thought.

December 16th, 5:27pm

"Why don't you come over sometime? My wife would love to see you, just something to think about..."

This message made something inside him break, the world shattering as his knees failed him. He swore he felt time stop as he reread those nauseating characters.

Wife? Since when was he remarried?

'Does she even know what he did to my mom, to me?' Spencer wondered, unable to tear his eyes away from his phone.

Does she even know she left a ten-year-old alone with his mentally-ill mother? Did she know what a selfish bastard he was?

Did they have kids?

Were they really that easily replaced?

Spencers mind was spinning, his apartment floor unsteady underfoot as his vision blurred. Tears stung his eyes, threatening to slip down his cheeks if he dared to blink.

His misery was interrupted as his phone buzzed once more in his palm.

Thankfully, it wasn't from the dreaded unsaved number, just Hotch.

December 16th, 7:14pm

"We have a case."

Spencer gathered his things, wiping the tears from his eyes on the cuff of his sleeve. He'd never been more grateful to hear those four words in his entire life.

His ride on the metro felt infinitely slower than normal, much to the young doctors dismay. The extra free time gave his mind permission to run away from his as much as it pleased.

His phone vibrated again and again with more messages from the unsaved number, each one more hostile and manipulative than the next when Spencer glanced at the device.

December 16th, 7:23pm

"Will you at least give me an answer? I know I screwed up, but that was a long time ago! I have a right to get to know my son."

December 16th, 7:25pm

"Imagine how I feel, not knowing my son has 3 PhD's and having to find out from my ex-wifes nurse. You're not the only one suffering here kid, remember that."

Spencer snapped his battered phone shut in frustration.

How did he even manage to make himself out to be the victim in this?

He's the one who left me.

'I don't owe him shit, not after what he did to me', Spencer thought furiously to himself, his knuckles white where they gripped his messenger bag.

'Maybe I should give him some kind of answer, let him know where he can stick-'

By the time the sentence popped into his head, his chest aching, he had reached his stop. Although cases weren't particularly a positive thing, anything was better than thinking about the man who had abandoned him and, subsequently, essentially ruined his entire life.

As soon as he stepped off the elevator and into the bullpen, he could feel his co-workers' eyes pierce right through him. It was almost like they could sense something was off with him the moment he entered Quantico.

Of course, while they were profilers, it's not like they were mind-readers.

He fled to the break room and poured himself a generous cup of coffee. He wanted to focus on what was important, which was certainly not the unread messages from a fetid man on his cellphone.

While pouring practically the entire container of sugar into his travel mug, he felt someone's hand touch his shoulder. He flinched slightly at the unexpected touch, and he turned to see Morgan, his eyebrows scrunched together in a confused and worried look.

"Slow down, kid. Have some coffee with your sugar." He said, his voice half-joking as he, presumably, tried to ease the tension practically emitting off of Spencer.

His phone vibrated once more from somewhere in his pockets, and Spencer's face twisted in fervent discomfort.

"Earth to Pretty Boy. You good?"

Spencer realized he was getting absorbed into his thoughts again and tried to brush it off with a quick sip of the sickly-sweet caffeinated concoction in his hand and a quick nod.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking." as if Spencer ever stopped thinking in the first place.

"Well, I'm here if you need anything, kid. But for right now, let's go find out about this case." Derek clapped Spencer on the shoulder again, which earned an instinctual flinch.

Instead of dwelling on that, Derek and Spencer strode towards the conference room, where everyone else had already begun piling in ad Garcia and Prentiss introduced them to their present case.

"Three men were found dead on the streets of a Nevada strip mall last night," Garcia began, pulling up the crime scene photos onto the screen.

Spencer flipped through the folder that was handed to him, scanning over the photos while distantly listening to the rather gruesome but ultimately unhelpful details Prentiss and Garcia were describing.

All three men had one of their fingers removed, yet their wedding bands were later found in their stab wounds upon closer investigation. They were all three found in close proximity to different hotels and known "lover's lanes".

The incessant vibrations and noise emitting from the dreaded device in his pocket was enough to make Spencer have a brain aneurysm.

He retrieved the phone from his pocket only to switch it off and shove it into the deep depths of his messenger bag. It wasn't necessary for a plane ride anyway.

His sudden movements earned him a few more concerned glances, but their attention was quickly diverted as Prentiss announced, "Wheels up in 30." effectively dismissing the team to get their things.

Spencer was restless the entire plane ride. It was only thirty minutes into the trip, with an hour and ten minutes left.

Normally, he'd be playing chess or even reading, but neither of those things seemed to tempt him, as all he could think of were the numerous messages probably flooding his discarded phone banished to the bottom of his messenger bag.

The last message he'd read replayed repeatedly in his mind like some awful alarm.

'Imagine how I feel...'

It made fiery anger swirl in his chest.

He could imagine how he felt. Because the pain William Reid inflicted before he finally left was enough to make Spencer understand what it was like to be sent to Hell and back, if such a place existed.

The memory of watching his own father leave his house at age 10 was enough to make him feel nauseous. His father leaving was the final stake through the young man's heart.

The physical pain, he could probably forgive him for. He would never forget, but maybe he could understand.

But leaving your young on to care for his mentally-ill mother? After all the pain he put him through, that kick while Spencer was already down was a new low.

For all Spencer cared, the man could rot. It was almost funny, thirteen years of healing down the drain with just a few text messages.

Once again, Spencer was ripped from his thoughts by a hand on his shoulder, It was Hotch, with a guarded but concerned look on his face.

"You've been way too quiet; is everything alright?"

'No', Spencer thought to himself. But he couldn't admit he wasn't okay, especially not before a case. More important things needed to be tended for than his own "daddy issues".

"I'll be okay," Spencer settled for. "Just some weird stuff has been happening lately. It's nothing I can't take care of, though."

It didn't dissuade Hotch's concerned look. If anything, it intensified the worry Spencer found there.

"Is it your mother? Is she alright?" He asked, leaning forward with furrowed eyebrows.

"She's okay! I actually just called her the other night," Spencer assured him. He bit his lip and gripped his messenger bag. "It's actually, uh, my dad. He's been messaging me, and I haven't spoken to him in thirteen years."

"Are you okay? Have you messaged him back any?" Hotch asked, releasing the worried lines on his forehead.

"I haven't, yet. I figured I'd wait until the case was over. That way, there's nothing in the way." Spencer explained, shifting uncomfortably in his seat as his eyes darted around the jet cabin.

Hotch must have picked up the signal to wrap up the conversation, because he gently reminded the young man that he could talk to him whenever he needs to, or just whenever he wants to.

Spencer smiled and inclined his head slightly. "Thanks, Hotch."

"It's not a problem, Reid. Now, let's get back to work."

Spencer flicked through the gruesome photos once more, the swirling anger in his chest dwindling for the first time since his phone at first pinged with that dreaded message.

For once, Spencer was able to completely forget about the slightly outdated phone burning a hole in the bottom of his messenger bag.