#i have yet to get any weirdos on here and i would like to keep it that way
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doing-something-unholy · 2 months ago
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Wanted to reblog a cool vintage drawing of priest vestments but luckily i checked op first- they were a regular catholic blog 😬
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fastandcarlos · 5 months ago
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Just A Ski “Inchident” : ̗̀➛ Charles LeClerc
summary: a chaotic trip to the ski slopes was never going to end seamlessly, was it?? ⛷️
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liked by carlossainz55, carmenmmundt and 482,827 others
ynusername: what could possibly go wrong here? ⛷️
31,048 comments
username1: why do I feel like this is gonna end so badly?
charles_leclerc: I’ll be right there to make sure that you’re safe sweetheart 💕
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc you’ll be off and forgetting about me in no time
arthur_leclerc: @/charles_leclerc @/ynusername and if he doesn’t keep you safe I’ll be there to push him down the mountain 😂
username2: omg hope you guys have the best trip ever 🤩
landonorris: I’m betting £20 you come back with a broken bone!
ynusername: @/landonorris pls don’t jinx me like this 😭
username3: pls just stay safe both of you we don’t need any injuries 🤞🏻
carlossainz55: you’re so brave trusting charles to take you skiing!!
username4: I don’t have a good feeling about this 😂
maxverstappen1: next time we’ll have to go on a couples holiday down to the slopes!
ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 I don’t think I’ll be at your level of skiing for quite some time 😂
username5: everyone on that slope better watch out with you two about!!
iamrebeccad: I promise you’ll love it, skiing is the best thing ever once you get the hang of it 🫶🏻
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liked by landonorris, pierregasly and 2,048,462 others
charles_leclerc: back on the slopes doing one of my favourite things in the world 🏔️
204,473 comments
username6: there’s something about charles in ski gear that really speaks to me 🔥
georgerussell63: enjoy your trip, nothing quite like the adrenaline of flying down the slopes ⛷️
username7: is there anything that this man can’t do??
danielricciardo: I’ll laugh now if you come back more broken than yn does
charles_leclerc: @/danielricciardo that’s impossible, you just wait until you see poor yn ski 🥹
username8: poor yn is probably cursing charles out so bad rn!
maxverstappen1: still slightly offended I didn’t get an invite ngl…😂
username9: he looks like he’s in his element ngl
carlossainz55: please come back in piece to try and finish off the end of the season 🙏🏻
charles_leclerc: @/carlossainz55 it’s not me you need to worry about…
username10: I bet he’s one of those show offs that makes it look so much easier than it actually is 🙃
ynusername: I’m still sat here wondering how you ever convinced me to do this 😂
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername by the end of this trip you’ll love skiing, trust me 💞
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liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri and 573,049 others
ynusername: this weird guy kept following me up the slopes, apparently he says he’s some sort of expert but I’m yet to be convinced 😂🚠
48,201 comments
username11: ngl I wouldn’t mind that view staring at me on a ski lift 🫠
iamrebeccad: you look like you’re doing so well, told you you’d get the hang of it 🤩
username12: he’s an annoying expert at everything he does 😂
pierregasly: don’t believe him yn, trust me, I’ve been skiing with him before!!
username13: I love the relationship that these two have omg
landonorris: you’re so right, he’s a giant weirdo 😂😂
username14: what I would give to be in yn’s shoes rn rather than staring at these photos kicking my heels in bed
username15: at least charles looks like he’s taking care of yn so far 😂
arthur_leclerc: the going up is fine, it’s the going down you’ve got to worry about⛷️
ynusername: @/arthur_leclerc don’t say that 😭
username16: best of all you’re still standing, that’s the main thing!
danielricciardo: how much are you regretting saying yes to this trip out of 10??
ynusername: @/danielricciardo 10/10 what have I signed myself up for!? 💯
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liked by iamrebeccad, arthur_leclerc and 472,927 others
ynusername: it turns out quite a lot can actually go wrong when skiing 😭
61,048 comments
username17: oh yn only you could end up doing something like this 😂
georgerussell63: I’m trying so hard not to love but honestly how do you manage to always end up like this!
ynusername: @/georgerussell63 I told you all I wasn’t built for skiing
username18: sending you so much love and hope the injury isn’t too bad 🤞🏻
charles_leclerc: at least you got to go back and enjoy the hot tub 😉
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc I almost got some peace and quiet until you appeared 😂
username19: please make sure you get plenty of rest and take care of yourself!
maxverstappen1: I don’t even think I want to ask how you managed to do this 🤦🏻‍♂️
username20: I blame charles for this, even if he wasn’t even there!
carmenmmundt: wish I was there to give you the biggest cuddle rn 🫂
alex_albon: and this is why I refuse to take lily skiing every year when she asks!!
username21: oh yn, I’ve never met anyone so clumsy in my life 😬
landonorris: is it broken?? do I get my £20??
ynusername: @/landonorris none of your business 😂😂😂
charles_leclerc: @/landonorris nothing broken so no one is coughing up just yet!
username22: I can just picture charles laughing his head off at this too
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liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 2,028,574 others
charles_leclerc: just to let you all know yn is back in the cabin and resting well, when I offered to stay and take care of her she told me to go away and that I’d done enough damage 😂😂
197,473 comments
username23: glad to hear yn is on the mend and getting plenty of rest 🥺
iamrebeccad: yes @/ynusername put him in his place 😂💪🏻
username24: bless her, hopefully the injury isn’t anything too nasty
arthur_leclerc: she’s only resting because you’ve finally stopped laughing at her 😂
oscarpiastri: why you’d pick to ski anyway when there’s all that sunshine is crazy to me!?
ynusername: you did enough damage suggesting we go skiing in the first place 🤦🏻‍♀️
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername how was I supposed to know you’d be this bad at it??
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc it’s like you forget how clumsy I am 🙃
username25: looking at that cabin I’d want to be left alone to enjoy it too!!
carlossainz55: yn saying what so many of us have wanted to say for so long 🙌🏻
charles_leclerc: @/carlossainz55 have you forgotten were teammates?? you’re supposed to be on my side!
username26: she’s probably just embarrassed charles to be hurt 😭
danielricciardo: I think I’d much rather be where yn is, it looks so warm and cosy 😍
username27: you two can’t go anywhere without causing chaos 😂😂
maxverstappen1: at least now you can go and show off without having to worry about yn
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liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 582,713 others
ynusername: charles fell on his ass so hard today and I can’t begin to tell you how hard I laughed 🤣🎿
52,958 comments
username28: revenge is the sweetest dish ever!!!
lilymhe: you guys are adorable 🥹
charles_leclerc: I’ll give you that one, I probably deserved it 🤣
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc the best bit is I got in on camera to hold against you forever 🙌🏻
maxverstappen1: @/ynusername I’ll pay you a thousand pounds to send me that video!!!
username29: go on yn! get him back for laughing at you!
carlossainz55: I hope you got right up in his face and laughed too 😂
username30: I swear he’s just as clumsy as you are sometimes 😂😂
iamrebeccad: glad to see you finally smiling again girlie 💕
username31: I can’t get over how messy this whole trip has been for you both 🤦🏻‍♀️
danielricciardo: it’s gonna be a miracle if you both make it home in one piece at this rate…
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liked by arthur_leclerc, ynusername and 2,958,473 others
charles_leclerc: the trip of a lifetime, even if the two of us are returning much more battered and bruised than we were when we arrived 🎿💕
278,500 comments
username32: please hurry up and get home where we know you’ll be safe from injury again 😂
ynusername: definitely a trio of a lifetime and never again!!
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername let’s stick to the beach next year 💞
username33: promise us you’ll never go skiing with yn again charles!!
alex_albon: why you’d decide to throw yourself down on a mountain on skis is beyond me 🙄
username34: I dread to think how broken your bodies are rn…
maxverstappen1: maybe we’ll rethink that couples holiday after all 😂
username35: you guys are definitely built for the sunshine ☀️
danielricciardo: I can’t see yn agreeing to one of your ideas for a while after this
username36: I’m just impressed you’re both still standing at the end of it 😂
landonorris: can’t believe I didn’t win my bet, I’m impressed there aren’t any broken bones!
charles_leclerc: @/landonorris no one is more impressed than me 😂
username37: yn really was brave for ever agreeing to this!!
iamrebeccad: can’t wait to have you guys back home and where you belong 🥺
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jiminrings · 6 months ago
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four seven eight, phase 3 (2)
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pairing: jungkook x reader
wordcount: 9k
glimpse: you’re pushed to the edge after eunsu’s stunt, and it makes jungkook realize that he’s no longer secure when it comes to being a husband and a dad.
alternatively, jungkook goes back to square one with you, but especially with hwayoung.
[ part one, intermission, part two, intermission 02, finale — complete series masterlist, from phase 1 to 3 ]
[ angst, fluff, the double-edged desire of wanting more n Being More despite having almost everything, hwayoung being the universe, mentions of eunsu breaking in into jk's hotel room, jus eunsu being a weirdo in general, 478 couple goes old school YIPPEEEE, yoongi as his own warning, eventual redemption ]
notes: heh... i did say it wud get a little worse before everything gets better!!! :O
as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!!
Hwayoung keeps staring at Jungkook’s empty spot on the dining table.
“Where’s appa?” 
She looks like a spitting image of Jungkook with the way her brows are furrowed and her bottom lip pouted, clearly confused to why her carbon copy still isn’t here. Hwayoung’s heard your explanation a dozen of times already, yet she asks you again — not because she forgot already, but because she’s in disbelief.
“He’s working, Young-ie,” you smile tightly, cutting up her pancakes once again to redirect her into eating instead of asking where Jungkook is. She eats, even if you don’t slice the pancakes the way Jungkook does (he cuts them up to look like a window with four, almost-perfectly divided slices) and in the same breath, you try not to pull out your phone to ask if he’s already had dinner.
Loving Hwayoung is extremely easy, even if you get choked up from time to time trying to internalize the fact that she’s yours and Jungkook’s. There’s a continuous beep in your chest that rivals the volume of what pedestrian crossings sound like when they turn green; it’s been ringing ever since you found out you were pregnant with Hwayoung and came to the realization that you owe everything (if the world happens to not be enough) to her.
Hwayoung may be a curious, bubbly child, but the extent of her questioning only stops when you tell her that Jungkook’s working. She doesn’t prod any further than that, settling for a generic answer you’d expand on if only you could find the heart to. 
Hwayoung doesn’t ask why you hold her a lot more closely than you’d usually do when you’re asleep or why her oversized sleep shirts lately belong to you and not Jungkook, not because she doesn’t care about the sudden absence of her dad, but because the abundance of you almost makes her forget about her new routine.
Almost.
She goes down from her seat (just like how Jungkook taught her with both hands and extreme care) wordlessly, strolling off with a determined gait, only to return with your cat in her arms like it’s a normal occurrence at seven in the morning.
“What are you doing with Miso, Young-ie?” you question playfully, getting your answer soon enough when she carries Miso up to where Jungkook’s plate would be.
Your daughter seems pleased about the situation altogether, nevermind the fact that the too-chunky-for-her-age cat she’s been spoiling with treats is at the head of the table instead of Jungkook.
Hwayoung’s young. She’s young enough to the point that you can withhold entire truths from her without having to clarify your words. Even more, she’s young to the point that you can’t even tell if she’ll remember this point in her childhood for the years to come.
You can’t tell if Hwayoung will even remember the chunk of time wherein Jungkook’s nowhere to be found and she’s upset about it, nor if she’ll even recall in the future about the way you’re looking at her with so much fondness and desperation at this exact moment — but nevertheless, you want Hwayoung to be young in the same way you want to be honest.
Neither you and Jungkook can withhold anything from her if it means making her happy; even if it means she won’t do something as futile as making a cat a placeholder for her dad.
“Do you miss him, baby?” you hum, feeling for your phone in your pocket as you rub the ridges of its case over and over again while deep in thought. You can’t even tell why you asked that because you know the answer already, regardless of your daughter beaming and nodding her head fervently.
“Do you wanna go on a trip?” you whisper to her ear as if it’s a secret, immediately getting her giddy. You comb through her hair with your fingers as she basically bounces on her seat, already clapping her hands because she knows the word and everything fun that it entailed. “Let’s surprise your appa, hm?”
It’ll just be a last-minute airline ticket purchase, which would happen to be Hwayoung’s first-ever plane ride that Jungkook won’t be there to see because the whole trip’s purpose is to get to him. It’ll just be a rest day or two that you have to coordinate and apologize for over and over again for the potential inconveniences you’ll create. It’ll just be a blip in Hwayoung’s memory soon enough, one you’re uncertain if she’ll even remember, but you figure that it’ll be worth it.
It’ll be worth it because it’s Jungkook, you think as you cram yours and Hwayoung’s belongings into a single backpack with no other luggage in tow.
It’ll be worth it because it’s Jungkook, you rethink while contemplating about how it’s rare for you to be impulsive, but at your fate, with respect to Jungkook, you completely surrender.
It’ll be worth it because it’s Jungkook, you mutter under your breath as you hastily plan with Jimin on the phone about your temporary quick leave, if he can look after Miso, and how to get to the airport without being noticed and most importantly, without Hwayoung being pictured at all.
Your daughter doesn’t know any better about how you and Jungkook go to extreme lengths to protect her, or how the straps of your backpack are digging into your shoulders, or how you’re nervous because it’s her first plane ride and you don’t know how she’ll take it, or how you’re ready to bolt immediately with her in your arms because she’s only yours and Jungkook’s and no one else’s.
You’re not the world-famous and critically acclaimed actress in this long-haul flight; you’re a mom to Hwayoung trying to get her to yawn repeatedly so her ears wouldn’t get clogged, you’re a mom hanging her head down in apology when it’s the fourth flight attendant to approach you asking for a picture, and you’re a mom who just happens to be extremely desperate and humble to beg said flight attendants to help you deplane first so nobody else would look at your or your daughter.
For a split second, or even for as long as you hold Hwayoung and beyond that, you forget the trophies and plaques attached to your name.
You no longer want to be the best when in your arms, Hwayoung’s jet-lagged and fighting through said fatigue, because you’ve convinced not only her but yourself, that it’ll all be worth it because it’s Jungkook.
( ♡ ) 
Hwayoung sleeps in your arms the whole time.
You figure that she’s out cold because you’re wearing Jungkook’s hoodie, knowing better than anyone about how your baby gets completely placated whenever she’s held. It’s heartwarming to see her this way even in such odd circumstances, the fist that’s curled up on your shirt reminding you when things used to be a little more simple.
The stress that’s been accumulating inside your temples threaten to burst and you fear that you’ll be set off by the most miniscule thing while you’re on your way to Jungkook. You’re sleepless and you’re bubbling inside with annoyance and it takes an absurd amount of energy from you to try and contain yourself.
Coordinating with Jimin through the phone makes your nostils flare, even if he’s trying his best to be helpful. Seeing people on the street in large groups, without even knowing the reason why, makes your jaw clench. Even the driver who keeps looking at you on the rearview mirror in concern makes you want to rip your hair out.
You’re frustrated and angry, even if you try convince yourself that Jungkook is worth all the fuss.
“Young-ie,” you whisper, shaking her awake gently. Your free hand’s already gripping your backpack even if you’re still minutes away; if only you had the remaining patience (maybe even optimism) to look at yourself, you’ll see the irony of you being the equivalent of overeager dads you hate on airplanes that immediately stand upon landing, even when the connecting tube to the terminal hasn’t been attached yet. “Wake up, baby. We’re getting closer.”
Everything feels a little heavy. The weight of your backpack is not the problem, and neither is Hwayoung who’s glued to you by the hip.
You have the terrifying idea in the back of your head, locked and loaded for anyone (read: Jungkook) to see if they take the additional second to ask you, that you’ll have to suffer all over again; that you’ll have to establish an ultimatum with a time limit of sorts, just so you can nullify the vacancy in you by pushing Jungkook away again.
Even now, a part of you wonders about Sora. 
She’s no longer a part of your husband’s life, for good this time, yet she occupies your mind every once in a while as if she’s a bad meal on a bad day you have to stomach over and over again. You want to vomit her out completely and rid yourself of the taste of being inferior to who came before you, and yet, she lingers like a stray who knows its home.
You wonder if she’s happy with her life and how it turned out, even if Jungkook’s no longer in it despite being each other’s first for everything. You wonder if she ever thinks about Jungkook whenever it’s April 23 or when she walks past tent bars; if she’s ever married now and has a family like you and her first love do.
You wonder about Sora from time to time because if Jungkook really loved her, you fear that a little bit of it would always linger.
In the same way that you had really loved a multitude of things growing up, little bits of them would always linger even if you’ve sworn off them. 
Your old obsession with tiny bottles of perfume you could only buy from boutiques (and never from malls) resurfaces whenever you visit your parents and magically, they always have a box filled up with your childhood shirts they’ve spared for Hwayoung to wear, imbued with a scent you can place to a memory, but not replicate.
The old fixation you had on patchwork blankets lingers whenever you head to the stockroom to store a PR package you could justify keeping for future purposes, only to see the unopened stacks of shirts you’ve gotten from numerous workshops, countries, and tapings as mementos throughout the years. They sit there in the dust, waiting patiently for you to take notice, but you avert your eyes as to not start a project you can’t bring yourself to finish.
The old liking you had towards the color orange stains on your fingers whenever you peel tangerines for Hwayoung, training a keen eye on her as she holds it for herself while slicing the portions you have at hand for her to eat safely. 
You wonder about Sora and if she ever holds the regret of letting go of Jungkook for someone like you.
You wonder if Jungkook’s love for her, although dissolved and voided already, lingers through the existence of Eunsu — someone who’s much, much different than you, just like Sora was.
Love is not supposed to feel heavy and you stand by it, because holding Hwayoung while carrying the backpack that’s meant to sustain the both of you in a foreign country, just because you don’t want any excess baggage as you surprise Jungkook out of nowhere, has never felt lighter in your heart.
Love is not supposed to feel heavy, even if you wonder why the door to Jungkook’s hotel room is open by itself without needing a key.
Love is not supposed to feel heavy, even if you meet several pairs of eyes that either locks or avoids your own, all for a multitude of reasons. 
“Jungkook,” you whisper, pupils shaking as you instinctively turn Hwayoung’s head away from the sight before you. “What’s going on?”
Your husband, who’s evidently rattled for more reasons than one and is dressed in his pajamas, stares at you head-on with his bottom lip trembling.
His staff members, some of which you recognize, avoid your gaze whilst one of them continues talking on the phone with an apologetic bow.
The members of hotel security, both of which are a little lost in what’s happening because they’ve only been suddenly called to the room of a husband to a celebrity they didn’t catch the name of in a hurry, gasp in realization when they recognize you instantly.
Eunsu, who’s clad in only a silky nightgown that leaves almost nothing to the imagination as she’s restrained to a chair by hotel security, scoffs at your presence.
.
.
.
“It’s not what it looks like, I swear,” Jungkook repeatedly mumbles to you, even if he only catches a shadow of you lingering somewhere as you bounce in between places trying to sort everything out.
“I-I didn’t do anything. We didn’t do anything. I never wanted things to go like this in the first place,” he says to you over and over again, even if you’re on the phone with Jimin to get ahead of damage control if the news ever breaks out.
“I’d never.. I-I’d never cheat on you, Y/N. I’ll never hurt you,” your husband whispers to you like a broken record, running his thumb over your knuckles to try and get you to calm down as if you’ve lost your cool for the past two hours.
The whole thing’s been foiled.
Neither you, Jungkook, or even the staff can even think about the short film’s immediate downfall without it even being released yet because from the get-go, it had already been a raging wildfire with Eunsu in it.
There’s no talk about the film. 
There’s no talk about the hours, efforts, and even money wasted on it because all that you could think about— all that everyone who knew of the situation just now could think about, is how Eunsu broke into Jungkook’s hotel room to seduce him.
There's no talk about the unspoken rule in between the staff to tiptoe around their executive producer’s wife, and most especially his daughter. It’s no secret that the two of you dropped in unannounced (they recall Jungkook being miserable so they knew there was no way he could predict his family was about to surprise him), and yet with the way they give you space and nothing but humility, you’d mistaken them for devoted fans.
There’s only hushed, cordial conversations between everyone to keeps things up to date and under wraps. There’s only gratitude, pity, and assurance thrown your way about how they never liked Eunsu in the first place and how you were such a good, filial wife and mother to clean up the mess attached to Jungkook’s name whilst keeping Hwayoung close to you the entire time.
“She’s detained by the police now. I’ve already called up lawyers back at home. We’re pressing charges,” you say, finally standing in one place. “I have Jimin drafting everything in place in case word gets out.
You’ve been going back and forth trying to sort everything and everyone from the police, to the hotel security, and even Jungkook’s staff — even if you’ve already vacated Jungkook’s room for the three of you to be transferred to a different room in a different hotel entirely, not once have you set Hwayoung down.
You haven’t even let him hold her once since landing here.
Jungkook’s shaking in anger, or atleast whatever it is that drowns him whole even if his head is only submerged in between his knees as he tries to breathe. He’s spoken perfectly and concisely when he was asked for his statement. He’s spoken without a hitch when asked for his honesty, and he hasn’t even faltered once when he asked for the footage of Eunsu seducing a receptionist to break into his room to support his rock-solid testimony.
Jungkook even cussed Eunsu without stuttering as she basically confesses her crime (while cursing you, who didn’t want to look at her, in the process) whilst being dragged away by the cops.
Ironically, the only people who had everything going on for him whom he momentarily tried to distance himself from, are the first people to his rescue. The bed in the new room is more than massive, yet you don’t even lay Hwayoung on it; she’s still in your arms that are screaming to give out, and the backpack you’ve packed for the both of you is yet to be opened, sitting on the opposite side of the room to Jungkook’s massive luggage.
Everything has failed and collapsed around Jungkook, yet it’s you who cleans up after him.
.
.
.
You only let Hwayoung sleep on the bed once you needed to book separate flight tickets.
“It’s not a problem for me. We’ll be less recognizable together,” Jungkook answers quickly when you question him if he could take Hwayoung back while you get on a later flight.
He’s snappy this way, trying to ignore the raging pounding on his head that you’re upset with him; that perhaps not only were you disgusted with him, but you were also exhausted of him entirely.
There’s a massive knot in Jungkook’s throat that doesn’t want to untangle in the slightest. He feels like he’s about to choke on nothing because he rethinks that he has no right to feel tired; that he has no right to close his eyes for even a second because you haven’t slept for a day and even longer, and that he has no right to feel this low when he’s dragged you down even lower.
You only nod quietly at his answer, clicking on your phone without meeting his eyes as you blow money on last-minute flights without even flinching.
“You okay?” 
You ask softly, the bags under your eyes more evident under the warm lighting. You’re sitting on a chair at the corner of the room like you’re a complete stranger while Jungkook’s sitting on the edge of the bed like he’s only a familiar guest. 
It’s only Hwayoung in this room who’s acting as if she belongs here. 
Right now, it’s only your daughter serving as the common denominator that you have with Jungkook — with her asleep, your husband can’t even tell if he’s on the same ground with you. 
“Did she touch you anywhere?” you add, slouching on your knees. You’ve never laid back since you’ve gotten here, the fear that something bad would happen to you or anyone in your family if you took your eye off the ball for the slightest second overtaking you.
Even after you’ve cleaned up Jungkook’s mess, it’s you who tries to reach out; it’s you who tries to keep everything and everyone together, even if it’s by the thinnest thread that incessantly digs into the palm of your hands, even tighter than how your wedding ring could.
“No, no. She didn’t even get close. I just… I immediately yelled so the staff nearby heard,” Jungkook answers truthfully, shaking his head slowly in the process.
You say that it’s a relief nothing else happened, and reiterate that you and Jimin have all exits covered.
You say that you’re sorry that it happened to him, and reiterate that you’re pressing charges.
You say that you’re there in case he wants to talk about it more, and reiterate that he has to wake up early so he and Hwayoung could go on the first flight back home.
Jungkook feels extraordinarily guilty. He feels so much regret in his stomach that he wants to throw up because your contained frustration for him is unbearable to the point that it brings him to tears.
"Give it to me," he inhales sharply, shoulders trembling as he buries his face in his hands. "Just give it to me."
“What are you talking about?”
"Why won't you yell at me?!” Jungkook sobs painfully, his own hand slapping down on his mouth as he tries to keep his volume down so Hwayoung could keep sleeping. He feels as if he’s tethering over the edge the longer that you look at him stoically, his fingernails digging to his palms roughly to the point that he draws blood. ”Why won't you tell me I told you so? Why can't you tell me that I had it coming?"
Everything and everyone except you is falling apart around Jungkook, and it brings him to his knees.
“Do you want me to punish you? Is that it?” you ask, clenching your jaw until it aches. 
Jungkook looks miserable this way. He looks like a devastated sinner awaiting judgement from a god whom he once lost his faith to. He looks like your husband begging, not for forgiveness, but for something more painful for as long as you feel compensated for what he’s caused you.
“You want me where to hit you where it hurts, Jungkook?” you laugh dryly, making him raise his head up as he nods slowly yet definitively, the tears on his face not close to stopping.
You say nothing while Jungkook expects everything, your husband unable to decode what you say under your breath as you turn your back on him to go shower.
You get out of the bathroom eventually, finally seeing that he doesn’t have his forehead touching the carpet.
Instead, Jungkook’s passed out from crying and has himself curled up into a little ball on the same chair you’ve sat on just awhile ago, with your clean change of clothes pressed on the bed right next to your daughter.
( ♡ ) 
Jungkook looks for you in everybody but he finds you in no one.
He woke up far earlier than his alarm (not that he had been in a deep slumber anyway) and the perpetual ache all over his body reminds him of that, his eyes glazing over you as if it’s the last he’ll see of you for decades.
Hwayoung stirs awake at the same time that he does, and for a moment, Jungkook thinks that everything’s okay.
For a split second, he mistakes today as one of your workdays wherein he wakes up early to prepare you your breakfast and it just happens that Hwayoung wanted to be a joey to a first-time kangaroo mother. He mistakes your little family in this hotel room to be a perfect one, wherein his only biggest hurdle in life is to keep his daughter inside his do-it-yourself sling while trying not to overcook your fried rice.
Apparently, Jungkook mistakes everything and everyone to be in favor of you, of him, to the point that he had deliberately ignored your plea to work with Eunsu all this time ago, and that decision of his has majorly, if not completely, undone everything you tried to work on for your family.
He tries to find you in the elderly lady who looks at him in pity as Hwayoung cries while they’re in first class seats, the shallow breaths he tries to ground himself to (so he wouldn’t panic and text you in fear of bothering you) doing nothing in the long run.
Your husband tries to find you in the foreign flight attendant who despite not knowing him or whom he’s married to, offers to hold Hwayoung as she explained that she’s a mother and also has a toddler at home.
Jungkook tries to find you in the remnants of your perfume on his daughter’s shirt. Hwayoung’s already stopped crying after some time of being cradled by the flight attendant, and the sight of his daughter calming down because of a stranger (who is obviously better than him) makes him want to be ground to a fine powder for everyone to walk over.
He feels ashamed in a way that he can’t even put into words. Jungkook feels far too inadequate, far too undeserving, and far, far pathetic that he fears not even his constant apologies to you would ever be enough.
Jungkook feels ashamed even when you take the last flight home and you go through the door like nothing’s wrong between the two of you, simply because Hwayoung’s watching. He feels like a dog fetching you your house slippers automatically but he wants to be reduced to something more filial; something a little more loyal to the point that it’s pathetic.
Your husband is ashamed even when you’re not awake and he can’t see your eyes avoiding his whenever your daughter’s not around.
Jungkook holds you tighter in his sleep, going so far as to kneel by the side of your bed instead of reaching across you, so Hwayoung wouldn't be caught in the middle — even if she’s already been since the start.
( ♡ ) 
Outside of you and Jungkook, only Jimin and Yoongi know about what happened.
You have your pride holding you back from telling your parents because in the back of your mind, there still lies the instinct of wanting to protect Jungkook, your own family, from the family that raised you.
You have no one to confide to except for your manager, who’s technically obligated to know what’s been going on with you when you suddenly call him up to tell that you’re surprising Jungkook in the US, only for your next call to consist of you asking for his help in a terse manner– and your best friend, who’s the first person Jimin calls whenever you’re in need of serious assistance.
There’s been no headlines of Eunsu breaking in and entering Jungkook’s hotel room, along with the follow-up details of how you and your daughter (whose existence is known but her privacy maintained to the highest level you can maintain) arrived as a surprise, only to be confounded by the very scene of your rival in a nightgown, held back by guards.
You know it’s going to come eventually.
You know the telltale dread that fills you up when something far bigger and beyond you is on its path to overtake you. The articles, the scrutiny, and the discourses haven’t even entered the stage yet you already feel sick because this time, it’s not only your name that’s going to be dragged into a situation you never thought would happen.
It’s also your daughter’s.
“We need to talk about Hwayoung,” you approach Jungkook as soon as you come home after your overtime, stilling in your tracks when you see Hwayoung sleeping in her pen.
Jungkook’s eyes linger on her before looking at you properly this time, the knot on his throat loosening at the prospect of what’s been bothering his mind repeatedly, but with the promise of a solution that he hasn’t arrived at, yet is bound to hurt him nonetheless.
“I was thinking the same thing.”
You sit on the far end of the baby blue floor couch as if you and Jungkook don’t share a home together.
“We look okay to her now but still,” you pause, looking down on your feet that are bruising from the heels you’ve been filming with all day and night. “I don’t want to put her in the middle of… everything that thisis.”
Jungkook nods, not only because he understands, but because he’s aware of everything, all the way from the guilt of being a husband to the guilt of being a dad. 
“She’s bound to ask questions too, and even if she’s not asking them now, I feel bad having to keep her in the dark.”
“She’s still young, Jungkook. I never thought I’d say this, but I mean,” you sigh, shrugging defeatedly as you try to look for the right words. “If we keep including her in situations that she shouldn’t be a part of, we’re only bringing her closer to harm. For all we know, someone somewhere has a picture of her during the trip.”
“I-I tried my best. I moved as fast as I-…”
“I know. I also tried my best when we took the trip to you,” you exhale heavily, trying to wrap your head around the complexity of the past week alone; you can’t even understand why you pushed yourself to go back to work immediately after going back home. “I’m not saying that Hwayoung’s known already. I’m just considering the possibility because we could never be too sure.”
Jungkook knows you’re trying to get rid of the guilt that forms in him for that matter, but for everything else, he knows better than to assume of you.
“Do you…” he swallows. “Do you also think that Hwayoung needs a breather from us? Not the other way around, of course, but you know-…”
“I know what you mean,” you nod your head, the guilt of being a mom to a Hwayoung coming easily these days. “It’ll be good for her to be around other people. To be away from what we have going on.”
You and Jungkook share a guilt that’s only unique to having Hwayoung under your circumstances, and it’s a burden you want to get rid of without ever hurting her in the process.
“We can’t have my parents babysit. They read me easily and I don’t want them to know,” you confide, making your husband hang his head in shame even if it wasn’t your intention.
“My parents can’t either. They went on a cruise.”
“I don’t trust nannies,” you add, making Jungkook nod deliberately.
“Who can we trust then?” he sighs, rubbing his hand all over his face as he tries to scour his brain for people. “Who do we have in our lives that Hwayoung trusts too?”
Your head tilts after a few seconds in realization, and Jungkook’s mind drifts to his daughter’s godfather whether he likes it or not.
You and your husband have the same idea in mind, with one being less fond of it than the other.
“I’ll call Yoongi.”
( ♡ ) 
“I want to be your personal assistant.”
Jungkook says in one breath, right in the middle of making your lunchbox. 
You woke up early in the first place because you neither thought nor expected for him to do it for you, but with the way he’s nearly done and making more than necessary, you’re clearly due to be corrected.
Without Hwayoung to tend to, Jungkook itches to have a purpose. He wants to be needed even if he isn’t and the thought always springs up on him whenever his girls are by themselves. The use of him, although not always necessary, is what keeps Jungkook up on his feet these days, nevermind the excruciating guilt and desperation of wanting to make it up to you.
He almost always came to accompany you to your shootings before Hwayoung came around and he’s reminded of it as he packages your meal, his shaking pupils meeting your own that are only begging for any sort of explanation.
It’s not that you don’t want Jungkook to try — it just happens that it’s been awhile since it was only, truly the two of you.
“Why?"
“Because I want to,” he merely shrugs, and when he steps out of the kitchen, you only keep your frown to yourself as you realize that he’s already dressed for the day.
Jungkook doesn’t invade your space like he usually does but he sits close enough to you on the drive to your shooting location; enough for you to feel the warmth that radiates from him without being overwhelmed.
It’s been more than a long time since this happened that you’ve practically forgotten what it felt going to work with Jungkook.
You forgot how your husband steps out of the car first to hold all of your things in one hand with the other reaching out to help you down. 
You forgot how he has a natural scowl on his face and how despite your staff knowing that you’re already married (and to him specifically), they can’t believe the sight of the two of you together.
You forgot how Jungkook likes to hang around you as if he’s a dog with only one owner in any place he can call home as long as he’s with you, that you forget to tell Jimin that you haven’t told your husband about the upcoming press conference at all.
Without even trying, Jungkook overhears Jimin (who’s giving him the cold shoulder) going through your schedule for the next two weeks, his jaw grinding at the particular event that he already knows is important without any explanation—
Without any heads-up from you at all, it seems like.
Jimin’s already left your trailer several minutes ago but Jungkook’s eyes are still fixated on the chair he sat on, his eyes looking past the flooring and deeper into the ground that he wants to be one with out of disbelief�� out of shame, even.
You always told him about your schedule and you didn’t leave anything out — it’s only now when it dawns on him that you haven’t been telling him about your work at all.
“Do you not want me there?” he asks, his voice thick with confusion. “Are you embarrassed of me or something?”
“It’s not like that, Jungkook.”
“Then make me understand,” he pleads with the hint of despair, the disbelief that coats his tone all throughout being entirely transparent.
You didn’t plan on how to break the news to him. You didn’t plan on letting Jungkook know about the media event at all.
There’s no other response that springs up to your throat except for the one that only exists since he’s had that drunken fight with you. 
“Because I don’t want you to ruin it again for me, okay?” you lick your lips, going more and more breathless the more that Jungkook mirrors how you looked back then when you begged him all those years ago. “Because the last time that I had a big press conference like this, you ruined it for me too.” 
The thought of Sora, and then Eunsu, and then Jungkook himself come hand in hand, and you wonder when will you stop suffering from the though process that haunts you whenever you’re reminded of press conferences — of your entire work in general.
“I don’t want to be reminded that you hate the life I gave you.”
Jungkook feels the urge to tuck his head in between his knees again, but he doesn’t want to run away this time.
“I said I’m sorry,” he surrenders as he lacks the words he had been telling you in numerous variations for the past days and weeks.
He didn’t think it had hurt this bad the last time around.
"And I only forgave you because it seemed right at the time," you clench your jaw, your exhale being more shaky than you expected. “I only forgave you because I had Hwayoung in my mind."
( ♡ ) 
Jungkook’s getting back into the groove of being by your side at work.
You’re still not fully adjusted to the sight of Jungkook during tapings, all while he moves about like it’s always been in his nature to assist you. He’s overeager in a lot of things, so much so that his presence practically attracts more attention than you do on set. 
It was just yesterday when Jungkook hollered and clapped his hands loudly after you say a long, emotional line before the director said cut and before your co-star could even say her line next, which led to you having to re-do the scene.
It was just two days before when he audibly groaned when an extra had to whistle at you for a scene and literally walked right into the set with his fists clenched, forgetting entirely that you were filming and that a random guy just didn’t catcall his wife in front of him.
It was just two minutes ago, when you ban Jungkook completely from watching you act.
“I’ll do it,” he perks up at the stylist as if he hadn’t been sulking to you just two minutes ago, his hands already fixing themselves on your arms to get you to stand up.
“Jungkook-…”
“But Mr. Jeon-“ she squeaks, about to say her thrice-rehearsed piece of doing her job (everyone on set has been warned about your husband making them jobless) when Jungkook basically carries you to your dressing room.
“No, no, I said I’ll do it!” he practically squeaks, setting you down wordlessly with a giddy smile on his face.
Jungkook’s too good at getting back into the groove of being by your side, you almost forget that the two of you aren’t entirely okay.
He gets you into your gown with utmost care (albeit a little confusion along the way), his hands caressing you with the familiarity that only he carries. Jungkook carries a weight with him that settles when he touches you in any which way, the weariness of his fingers dispersing as soon as you give him the slightest attention.
He may have looked stupid pretending he didn’t know how corsets worked or how petticoats are worn first before the actual gown, but his denseness had atleast bought a little more time from you.
A little more warmth.
Jungkook looks at you intimately, not in the way that’s begging for you to want to jump his bones, but in the way that he knows who you hated throughout the workday while having his warm hands work on your calves.
He knows every inch of you, which may be the reason his hands feel warmer on you than you recall, all the way to the tips of your toes that feel trapped all of a sudden.
“Oh, you don’t have to do that. I think they’re gonna swap out my shoes anyway because they won’t be seen,” you murmur, trying to avoid the heels and the pain they bring but not until he hushes you.
“I’m not putting on your heels. I’m putting on your socks.”
“I don’t need socks.”
“Your cold dogs keep rubbing up on my legs at night whenever you forget to put them on,” he snickers out of nowhere and it brings out a sudden snort from you, the brief and unorthodox moment hanging over you whilst the two of you gloss over the fact that not only have you not been intimate for so long, but you’ve also not cuddled despite sleeping in the same bed.
Jungkook walks you to your set with his hands raised in surrender, already murmuring to your worried director that he’ll stay out this time as soon as he finishes taking you.
“Wait,” he squeaks before turning back to you, making everyone else hold their breaths to see if they could retain their jobs today. Jungkook carefully removes your wedding ring that you forgot to stash, wearing it snugly on his pinky instead. “Just for safekeeping.”
( ♡ ) 
Jungkook’s not fond of the rain.
He’s not fond of it especially when your job requires you to stand under it.
“Your hazard pay should be ginormous for the work they’re making you go through,” he mutters, holding up an umbrella for you as some stylists make quick work of already pre-soaking you before the scene starts.
“It’s just a little rain,” you roll your eyes, about to shove your hands in your pockets because it’s getting a little cold already yet Jungkook notices before you even could, holding both of them with just one massive hand as he leans the umbrella more to your side.
“They should cancel the filming today. It’s pouring,” he continues like he’s never heard you, even if the rain isn’t terrifyingly bad. The weather’s only fitting because the scene calls for it, but even so, Jungkook feels hesitant.
He lets go of your hands for a brief second to retrieve the handkerchief that’s tucked to the waistband of his pants, already unraveling it for you in waiting.
“Blow.”
“What?” you narrow your eyes at him, looking down on the fabric until it finally hits you in realization.
“Blow your nose,” he nudges you, nodding his head to it but it only makes you shake your head even more.
“No way!”
“Just blow your nose now so you wouldn’t feel stuffy later.”
“I’m not gonna feel stuffy later. It’s just a little rain,” you roll your eyes, crossing your arms together as you beg internally for the lighting to be fixed so you could shoo your husband away.
“Blow your nose while I’m still asking.”
“Ew, no. I’ll look like a child in front of — Jungkook!”
Before you could even comprehend it, Jungkook’s already pinching your nose with the handkerchief, forcibly making you blow your nose, uncaring of the swooning and oddly endeared eyes trained on the two of you.
“Just a little rain. Heh,” he mocks, folding the handkerchief back up with one hand to tuck back into his waistband. Jungkook moves on like it’s nothing, begrudgingly leaving you alone without an umbrella, but not without raising his voice enough for the other staff to hear. “I’ll try to scare your management into raising your hazard pay.”
( ♡ ) 
Jungkook likes peeling fruits for you and Hwayoung.
He doesn’t like the sticky residue nor the lasting smell that gets stuck underneath his fingernails, but he manages. He’d only eat your leftovers and he wouldn’t do it for himself anyway, even if he knows you always get a little irked by the fact.
It’s his habit now to cut fruits for you in the most Hwayoung-tolerable slices possible, the bowl of tinily-cut tangerines underneath your hands as you skim through your script making him uncharacteristically silent; if he wasn’t apologizing to you, you would be talking each other’s ear off about Hwayoung.
He tries not to make a big deal out of brushing your hair because it’s been a while since the last time, instead reading your script along with you so he’ll be distracted. Jungkook doesn’t know if he can focus as hard as you do or remain like so for even longer, but at the moment, there’s only one line on the script that stands out to him.
It stands out, not because it’s long nor vulgar, but because the line belongs to him.
“That scene — will it be filmed today?” Jungkook asks, breaking the silence as he traces the words with his finger.
“Huh? This one?” you follow to where he points, shaking his head as you try to remember. “No. It’ll be next week, I think. I’m just memorizing in advance.”
Jungkook hums but it’s not out of interest, the sound that comes from him instead bordering on a wince. There’s a terse look on his face that you could only liken to jealousy, the thought of it unexpectedly making you snicker.
“Calm down, Jungkook. It’s not a kissing scene.”
“But you say I love you to him, though.”
“That’s worse?”
“Maybe. Probably,” he shrugs, the uncalled-for thought about what he’d feel if there’s a scene where you have to have (read: acting to have) sex making his throat close up painfully. “I can’t tell.”
The thought crosses your mind too, but you’d rather not dwell on it.
“How do I look like when I say I love you?”
Jungkook purses his lips, pausing from brushing out the section of hair he’s passed through more than ten times out of distraction (read: devastation).
You look like love itself if it had been personified. 
You look like an unexplainable feeling in an interrupted dream he had been born with, and his sole mission in life is to seek you.
You look like what miracles do and he’s the first witness each and every time until you’re canonized by everyone, except he always wants to place himself at your feet as your first devotee.
“I know exactly what you look like when you tell me you love me,” Jungkook answers. “But I don’t want to tell you.”
“Why not?” you laugh at his defensiveness, replacing your gaze on him through the mirror just to crane your neck up at him so you could see his reaction more closely.
“Because you only have to act it out,” he shrugs, eventually laughing along with you even if he means every word. “I want to be the only one that knows what you look like when you’re saying the truth.”
( ♡ ) 
It’s your first good day in a week and a half.
It’s actually the first day wherein you and Jungkook talked simply because you wanted to; the first day wherein your conversations didn’t revolve around Hwayoung and pestering Yoongi to send more pictures of her, and the first day wherein Jungkook didn’t try apologizing.
You hum in content as you sit on the couch as soon as you come home, your husband following suit and sitting next to you instead of giving you space.
There’s only a centimeter worth of distance between your hands placed on the couch, and if Jungkook only twitched in faux accident, his pinky (the one that still wore your wedding band) would be brushing yours already.
“It’s like we’re kids again,” you smile to yourself, looking around the entire house. You remember how your ceilings didn’t used to be this high and how your space didn’t used to be this wide — you remember how you and Jungkook weren’t always like this.
“We are kids,” he emphasizes, playfully rolling his eyes.
“Aren’t we pushing thirty?”
“I don’t wanna go into details right now,” he murmurs, slouching further into the couch and nearer to you, his hair that’s growing past his ears lightly brushing against your shoulder.
Jungkook looks around the house too, his eyes glazing past Hwayoung’s playpen, the laundry of a family of three that he’s yet to fold, and the toys of a cat who hates him that he has to sort out soon enough.
Jungkook’s life wasn’t always this way and although he appreciates the fact, he’s terrified by the possibility that it’ll be this double-edged sword that’s waiting to happen.
In the same way that worship is optional but devotion is necessary, Jungkook tries to hold you as tightly as he could without pushing you away.
“Baby,” he rasps out, chewing on his bottom lip as he tries to make sense of the ache that blooms in his chest. “What if…”
“What’s in your head, Kook?”
In the same way that devotion is necessary but worship is optional, Jungkook toes the line with a question that he has no telling what the answer is to.
“If you had the option to have Hwayoung with someone who isn’t me,” he clears his throat, trying to get rid of the immediate pang in his heart that follows.“Would you still have her?”
You think for a second and answer immediately, even if Jungkook wanted you to stay silent for longer because he’s afraid of what you would say.
“That’s not Hwayoung then.”
“No but I mean hypothetically, if you could have Hwayoung-…”
“I got what you meant the first time,” you interrupt him, gently shrugging him to get up from your shoulder so he’d look at you without running away. “That’s not Hwayoung,” you mumble, trying to keep up with the myriad of thoughts that he had opened up. “Hwayoung’s only Hwayoung because she’s part me and part you.”
Jungkook nods, except he doesn’t understand. You could say your piece over and over again, but Jungkook still wouldn’t understand because he doesn’t know what he wants to hear from you either.
“But what if she has all of you and you could pick someone else to be her dad,” he croaks, looking down on the floor with a grief that belongs only to him. “Would you still want her?”
“I want Hwayoung because she’s my daughter with you, Jungkook,” you sigh. “I could pick someone to be her dad and that someone is you. I already chose you — what’s hard to understand about that?”
You hear Jungkook asking you the question over and over again, even if his mouth is already shut. You see him looking at you with tears in his eyes even if they’re downcast on the floor in reality.
You feel yourself wavering even if you’re definite about your answer.
“You made me a mom and I made you a dad.”
“But I doomed us into this,” Jungkook weakly counters. “If only… i-if only I changed my ways earlier, if I — if I could’ve been just content with this perfect life you built for us, t-then we wouldn’t be-…”
Jungkook inhales sharply, the choke that soon follows ringing in your ears to the point that it pricks tears from your eyes. 
“We wouldn’t be in this situation, Y/N. I turned us into this,” he sobs. “If only I could’ve been s-satisfied, Hwayoung would be in my arms at this time while we wait for you to come home,” Jungkook shakes his head painfully, the clench of his fists evident even when you’re only looking at him from the corner of your eye. “If only I thought everything you— you spoon-fed me was enough, then Yoongi, of all people, wouldn’t be babysitting our daughter right now,” he pauses. “Why can’t I be in your press conference?”
You don’t have to look anywhere in the house to realize that Hwayoung’s playpen is empty.
You don’t have to tune anything out to realize that Hwayoung isn’t here in between the two of you, talking and giggling as you go about your day while you’re still wearing your outside clothes; while she’s still in her pajamas because she wanted to wait for you to come home.
The gravity of everything hits you all at once, making you hiccup in tears.
“You were really mean, Jungkook.”
In the same way that worship is optional but devotion is necessary, Jungkook listens to you even if it’s you cursing him.
“I’m not the best mom there is because I’ve missed so much milestones. I… I-I’ve missed so much trying to secure everything for you, for Hwayoung, f-for us because I don’t know how much more I could take,” you sob, burying your face in your hands. “Do you know how hard it is for me? Do you know how hard it is for me to work alone while knowing that my husband and daughter have each other at home? That I don’t have someone while I put myself out there?”
There’s a strain of grief in your heart that only you carry, and Jungkook can’t do anything about it.
“I feel so, so, s-so fucking guilty, Jungkook!” you shriek, your cheeks turning blotchy the more that you cry. “I-I… I had to pick up this child— this child actor— over and over again because my fake role is to be his mother,” you strain a laugh humorlessly, trying to screw your eyes shut so you wouldn’t see Hwayoung’s laundry from the corner of your eye. “Meanwhile, I can’t even hold my own child because her appa’s already taking good care of her at home.”
In the same way that devotion is necessary but worship is optional, Jungkook takes it, takes you, should this be his punishment.
“Jungkook, if you envy me, then you don’t know how much I envy you more,” you exhale in defeat, wiping at your eyes with the back of your hand. “If only I could, do you think I wouldn’t drop everything just to stay at home with you and Hwayoung?” 
“You could be mad at me all you want, Jungkook, but I still don’t want you to go to the press con.” 
“It’s different now, Y/N,” Jungkook whispers, his eyes rubbed red and raw as he pleads with you silently because no word, no litany can save him now.
“But how different is now from then? It’s like we’re kids again, Jungkook,” you whisper. “If you were the one in my place, would you drop everything if I asked you to?” you add, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Can you drop everything if I asked you to?”
( ♡ ) 
In a dream Jungkook doesn’t tell anyone, he’s never met Sora, and you happen to be his first everything.
In a dream your husband doesn’t tell anyone, he doesn’t know of Eunsu’s existence, and if he were to know about her, he only happens to think about her as your rival and nothing more.
In a dream he doesn’t tell anyone, he didn’t wake up late in your bed, and he most certainly heard Yoongi ringing the bell eagerly because he wanted to take Hwayoung home to see the both of you before you go to your press conference.
Jungkook bounds down the stairs so quickly that he almost trips on the way down. His hair is still unkempt and his shirt remains askew, yet he still goes down anyway with a speed you can’t even decipher because he’s already heard his daughter cheerful screaming.
"Up, up!" Hwayoung claps her hands, looking at Jungkook’s direction but not at him — instead, she’s looking at Yoongi who’s emerging from the kitchen.
In a dream Jungkook doesn’t tell anyone, Hwayoung doesn’t know anyone except for you and him.
“Up, appa! Up!”
In a nightmare that Jungkook’s experiencing in real time, Hwayoung mistakes Yoongi as her dad.
712 notes · View notes
scarletttries · 7 days ago
Text
Write A Kiss Request: Kang Dae-Ho/ Player 388 (Squid Game) x Reader...a kiss out of envy or jealousy
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(prompt list here) & 2025 Request List - requests open for Dae-Ho
...a kiss for Dae-Ho out of jealousy
Of all the places you had ever found yourself getting a crush on someone, this was definitely the strangest. An almost sterile dorm room with bunk beds stacked to the ceiling. A playground of kids games with deadly consequences. A way to pay off your debts but risking your life in the process. Yeah, you really didn't need your mind to keep floating away on one of the players you were competing alongside, and yet try as you might you couldn't stop thinking about Dae-Ho.
Maybe it was the way he tried his hardest to make you smile after every awful round of your latest terrifying ordeal. Or the way he was constantly going out of his way to keep you safe and make sure you felt protected around him. Honestly it might just have been how the muscles in his arms would bulge every time he brushed his long black hair out of his face and tied it up behind him the way his sisters had taught him. He was enchanting, and beautiful, and silly and warm and he felt like the perfect distraction, if not your salvation, in a place like this.
You only wished there wasn't another player trying to use you as the same kind of distraction.
You hadn't even heard of 'the great rapper Thanos' before you entered these bizarrely painted halls, cringing every time he cornered you between games to try and charm you with his barely rhyming words and creepy nicknames. It wasn't hard to see that he was just trying it on with every girl in this place, but that didn't make it any less stomach-turning when his sights were set on you.
Luckily Dae-Ho had also noticed the way Thanos watched intently whenever you strolled across the room, and how seem to keep track of you in every game you played. Of course, Dae-Ho was doing the same thing, but you welcomed his presence, and he knew you felt safe with him by the way you stuck to his side every chance the two of you had. He was sure you were just being polite when you laughed at Thanos's terrible jokes, and applauded his awful little songs. You had to be. There was no way you'd actually see something in that purple haired weirdo.
That's what the sweet, misguided marine tried to tell himself, his own simmering resentment and insecurity plaguing his mind every time he saw you and the wannabe rapper together. You were the only silver lining of this hell-hole, the one comfort he had found in his darkest time, and he couldn't let himself imagine that you could feel anyway other than the same aching he felt. A desperate longing for the two of you to escape this place, to go back to your homes and then carve a new one out together where debt, and judgement, and the fear of this place could never find you. In the scariest moments of the games that was what Dae-Ho pictured, and it gave him enough strength to keep going, for the two of you and the life you could have together.
And so it was hardly a surprise when after the latest game every drop of blood in his veins started to boil when Thanos ran up to you in the dorm and scooped you up in a dramatic reunion hug.
"Senorita! I was so worried I had lost my girl in that round, it was crazy!"
He was right that it had been crazy. The mad scramble to find a room, and the desperate clinging to any hand you capture, and the uncertainty of who else would emerge safely when the doors finally opened. Dae-Ho hadn't let you leave his mind or his side for the duration of the game, never feeling so certain about his devotion to you as he did now. It was a game that had everyone huddling together a little bit closer as the dorm filled again, and Dae-Ho wasn't going to waste the adrenaline coursing through his veins on anything other than getting you away from Thanos.
"She's not your girl." He stated firmly, a little louder than he meant to as he stepped between you and Thanos where the purple-haired player had finally set you back on your feet. It was a relief that Dae-Ho had said exactly the phrase you were thinking, feeling safer to put some distance between you and Thanos now that he had arrived. Thanos smirked and stared dead-eyed through him, still a little out of his mind and looking for a reason to argue.
"Says who? Some nobody!" He spat out, looking around for one of his little cronies to echo his bitter laughter. You could see the focused look in Dae-Ho's eyes falter as Thanos's words struck a nerve, the echo of his father's view of him his whole life. You inched closer to Dae-Ho, letting your fingers trace softly down his arm until your hand found his, immediately getting snatched up and safely enclosed. Dae-Ho ignored Thanos and looked at you, the soft smile of thanks you offered him enough to bolster his confidence. No matter what anyone else said, or how they saw him, you always made him feel like he could really be somebody. Somebody important, and brave, and strong.
Unhappy about being ignored, Thanos stepped closer, getting right up in Dae-Ho's face to taunt him, "You think she wants you? Please she's just playing hard to get, for ME."
Dae-Ho acted quicker than he could find the words to speak, using his grip on your hand to pull you closer until you were flush with his chest, his free arm wrapping tightly around your waist as he lowered his head towards you. There was no time to think, no moment of hesitation, only an aching amount of possessive affection towards you that he could only express by landing his lips against yours in such a smooth maneuver that it might have knocked you off your feet if he weren't clutching you so tightly. You let go of his hand in an instant and threw your arms around his neck, letting your fingers thread through his silky hair and catch the back of his neck, drawing him closer and making sure his lips didn't have the space to leave yours.
His kiss was so strong it was almost forceful, Dae-Ho trying to conjure every ounce of adoration he had for you and the future he imagined you sharing into that one sweet moment. He tried to memorize the sensation of your kiss, the feel of your lips, the way you tasted. Anything he could bring to mind in case he met his end at these games and needed one comforting thought for his final moment.
He was the one to pull back first, although reluctantly, turning to Thanos and saying in as serious a tone as you had ever heard him use,
"Leave her alone." Without giving him time to reply he began to walk away, his arm glued to your waist to make sure that no-one would be able to try to take you from him ever again. The moment Thanos was out of earshot, he leaned in close, eyes wide with disbelief now you were away from public view,"I hope that was okay! Sorry I kind of panicked and then..." You had to fight back a laugh at the absolute change in tone and the sudden loss of domineering confidence he had just moments ago. You did a quick glance behind to make sure you weren't still the object of Thanos's attention, and then reached up to stroke Dae-Ho's cheek, planting a sweet kiss on his lips before he could talk himself into any more anxiety.
"It was better than okay." You reassured him, watching his eyes light up as a bright smile spread across his cheeks. He squeezed your waist tighter as you continued back to the safety of your beds,
"I can't wait to get out of here with you. My girl." He said proudly, confidence renewed that he could face whatever games came next as long as he had you.
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vitalverstappen · 4 months ago
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Just Pretend - L. Norris
summary: a terrible night out in London may end up with you meeting someone new
pairing: Lando Norris x reader
warnings: drinking, a creepy guy flirting at the bar (not Lando), swearing
word count: 1.5k
a/n: i was going to post something completely different today but bc Lando won yesterday, i GUESS i'll post this against my will
masterlist
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The club was the last place you wanted to be tonight. Going out was never your thing. If you were going to drink, you’d rather have a glass of wine on your couch than be in a stuffy club with sweaty, smelly bodies. 
And yet, you found yourself out in a club in London. Your friend group decided to take a vacation out exploring the cities of Europe - cafes by day and the clubs by night. The sticky floors and loud music was overwhelming. 
It didn’t help that some guy was trying to talk to you. In hindsight, you shouldn’t have gone up to the bar alone. It was supposed to be quick, simply getting yourself a new drink and then returning to your friend group. 
“So what’s a pretty girl like you doing here all alone?” The man asked 
“Going back to meet up with my friends, actually” You answered as you grabbed your drink from the bartender. You sidestepped to the left to avoid the guy, but he followed, blocking you from leaving.
A smirk danced across his face as you looked at him. “Oh come on, you don’t wanna stay for a chat?” 
“No, not really” You replied, your voice lacking any interest in the guy. He wasn’t ugly, just nowhere near your type, “Look, I need to get going” 
“Why don’t I come with you? Make sure you get to your friends safely” He suggested. Shit.
“No, that’s okay. I don’t think…” 
Panic filled your mind as you tried to think of an excuse to get this guy to go away. Your eyes scanned the room for any signs of your friends looking for you. They all were in a circle, dancing to the music blasting through the speakers. It took a second glance around the bar to find an escape route.
On the other side of the bar stood a guy around your age who looked nice enough. His hair was a curly mop that sat on top of his head and his smile shined brighter than anything else dim light. You made eye contact with the boy, to which you responded with a distressed look. His eyebrows furrowed as his eyes darted between you and the creep that was standing with you. 
“...I don’t think my boyfriend would appreciate that” You finally answered 
The man you were still stuck with scoffed “Boyfriend? I don’t see him anywhere” 
“He’s over there” You said, motioning in the general direction that the curly headed boy was in. 
Before the creep could say anything, you were able to push past him. You could feel his eyes piercing through you as you made your way through the crowd. As much as you wanted to go straight to your friends, you knew if you did, the guy would keep pestering you. 
As soon as you walked up to the curly headed boy, you rambled, “Look there’s this creepy guy who’s been bothering me all night and I have no idea where my friends are and I’m tired and I just wanna go home. I really would appreciate it if you helped me out and pretended to be my boyfriend and hopefully get the guy off of my dick.” The words came out of your mouth faster than you thought was humanly possible. 
Apparently, the guy thought so too. The lights were on, but no one was home as he yelled “What?!” 
You sighed before leaning over to him, your mouth only a few inches from his ear. “Just pretend you’re my boyfriend for a minute!” You yelled over the music 
The boy looked you up and down before shrugging and placing his arm around your waist. “Yeah, sure, which guy is it?” 
A thankful smile was plastered on your lips as you yelled back a thank you before motioning to the guy from before “The weirdo standing at the bar all by himself”
The curly headed boy nodded as he made eye contact with the guy at the bar. He watched for a few moments as you danced with the boy, letting the music take over temporarily. The smell of his cologne took over. It was expensive, notes of leather, but also lavender filled your senses. It was a scent you could get used to. 
Once you were sure that creepy guy was gone, you relaxed. 
“Thank you again. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” You said 
The boy shrugged “It’s nothing really. I’m just surprised you’re here alone” 
A laugh escaped your lips “I wasn’t when I first showed up. I was here with some friends, but honestly I have no idea where they went.” 
“Some friends they are” The guy said “You wanna hang with me and my crew?” 
“I don’t see why not” You shrugged 
As the boy, who you quickly learned was named Lando, led you to his friends, the two of you introduced yourselves. He told you he was a racing driver for a team you had never heard of, and that he travels a lot for work. 
“So you’ve never heard of Formula 1?” He asked, confused 
You shook your head, “No. Honestly, I’m not really into racing” 
“Well maybe I’ll have to teach you about it” He suggested as he pulled you in tighter, almost as if he was proud he had you. “So do you come around here often?” 
You shook your head “Honestly, I’ve never been”
“Really? Why are you here then?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowed just like they were minutes prior
You didn’t know if it was the alcohol in your system, or if Lando was that easy to talk to, but you explained the trip that your friend group was going on. His eyes were focused on you as you told him each city that your group was supposed to be going to.
“Well, if you need a tour guide around the UK, let me know. I’d love to show you my stomping grounds” He offered
A smirk danced across your face as you took out your phone “I might have to take your offer, though I’m gonna need your number first” 
“That would help” Lando chuckled as he took your phone, putting in his number. He then led you to a group of men and what seemed to be their significant others. 
“There you are Norris! We thought we lost you!” One of his friends said as the two of you walked up 
“Nah, just grabbing a drink, and saving someone from a creep” He said “This is y/n” 
Lando went down the line of his friends and their significant others. From what you could remember, there was Charles and Alexandra, Pierre and Kika, George and Carmen, and Oscar and Lily.
“So you trusted him to save you?” The girl you remembered as Kika asked, a playful smile on her lips 
“Yeah, it was a last resort kind of a thing” You joked back 
Suddenly, going out to the club didn’t seem so bad. The rest of the night was spent getting to know Lando and his friends, drinks and laughs overflowing. Now that the weirdo from earlier was long gone, you let the alcohol finally hit you. The rest of the group was also fairly drunk, shown through the giggles over nothing. 
Whether the two of you were dancing, grabbing another round, or just talking, you and Lando were inseparable. Whatever connection you had with Lando, you knew he could feel it too. He had to be touching you somehow the entire night, if it was the brush of his fingers against yours, or your body pressed up against his. 
The club slowly emptied as the night drew to a close, though neither of you wanted it to end. Lando’s friends were all long gone by the time the two of you left, but neither of you cared. He insisted on walking you to your hotel, ensuring that you made it back safe. 
“If you had told me this morning that I’d be helping a girl escape some freak, and that it would lead to one of the best nights I had in a while, I would not have believed you” Lando laughed 
“Neither would I” You agreed, a smile on your face “But I had the most amazing time”
You said your goodbyes, promising that this wouldn’t be the last time you saw each other. He had said he’d show you around London after all. Lando watched as you disappeared through the hotel lobby door, neither of you able to shake the feeling that it was the start of something beautiful.
“Thanks guys for leaving me, I really appreciated it” You said as you walked through the door to the suite you shared with your friends. 
All of the girls were gathered in the main room, debriefing their night. As you announced your arrival, jaws dropped and eyes widened. A chorus of “I'm sorry’s” and “We tried texting” filled the room. You could only smile. 
“I actually had a great time. You’ll never believe how it went” You said as you sat yourself down on the carpet, ready to retell the last few hours.
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m1ckeyb3rry · 12 days ago
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hii, i was wondering if i could submit a request for a fic🤔I don't rlly have any specific prompt but i want it to be about karasu or zantetsu, either one is fine. i've read all of ur karasu fics and they're so good! i love ur writing sm!! if u don't want to i totally understand but i also just want to tell u that i think ur writing is awesome (^◡^)
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Synopsis: You become taken with your coworker’s roommate, Karasu, unaware that he’s just as fascinated by you — and maybe he has been for longer than you realize.
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BLLK Masterlist
Pairing: Karasu x Reader
Chapter Word Count: 8.6k
Content Warnings: relationship dynamics many would consider…interesting…, <- never thought i’d be using THAT for a karasu fic, i’m bored of normal karasu characterization so i made him ooc, he’s like fr a weirdo icl, otoya catches strays, yukimiya is just trying to get through the workday, reader is a model, reader’s feet are mentioned a lot?? not sexually in the slightest (they’re injured so she complains abt them) but i mean it’s there ig if you’re a hater, very vague and unfinished feeling not on purpose i just gave up tbh
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A/N: you sent this to me so long ago idek if you remember it LMAOAOAO i am so sorry i like fell off the face of the earth in terms of answering requests but HERE IT IS erm sorry it actually highkey sucks but at least karasu is in it…i guess…UGHHHH I HATE THIS BUT I COULDN’T KEEP PROCRASTINATING IT YOU LITERALLY SENT THIS IN THE BEGINNING OF AUGUST I’M SO SORRY MY DEAR but also tysm HAHHA you are very sweet!! i’m glad you like my writing and once again i am sorry for disappearing…
Additional: check my pinned post to make sure i have requests open; after reading the rules, please feel free to make your own!
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You had never seen the man leaning against the wall behind the camera before. He wore a dark trench coat and a plaid scarf looped around his neck, and unlike everyone else bustling about the set, barking out orders and shoving each other into place, he was entirely calm. In his right hand, he held his phone, scrolling through something on it with his thumb, and in between his teeth was a lollipop — cherry flavored, which you only knew because of the wrapper lying at his feet.
“That’s not Yukimiya, right?” you whispered to the girl who was buttoning up the back of your top.
“Hm?” she said. “No, Mr. Yukimiya hasn’t checked in yet. I have no idea who that is.”
He was tall, with wide shoulders and the type of face that must have been crafted with painstaking detail by someone or another, his features keen, his eyes a brilliant shade of blue so dark they were nearly violet or black. Dark hair fell into darker eyebrows like the ink of a ballpoint pen on a paper-pale forehead, and just above his left cheekbone was a black beauty mark, which changed everything and yet nothing about him.
You supposed he must’ve sensed your gaze lingering on him, for he furrowed his brow and then lifted his chin, scanning the room before his eyes meet yours. He didn’t seem offended by the prying, his lips curling into a smile as he lifted his left hand into a jaunty wave, returning his attention to whatever he was reading on his phone before you could respond in turn or do anything to feel less like you had been caught committing some crime.
“I’m sorry I’m late!”
This must’ve been Kenyu Yukimiya, your partner for the shoot. He was handsome, too, with a harried, windswept appearance to his reddened cheeks and tousled hair; when he grinned at you apologetically, he was entirely reminiscent of a painting from antiquity.
He sat in the chair next to you as the makeup team got to work, applying the faintest touch of product so that he was not entirely washed out by the blinding lights of the cameras in your faces. You returned his smile with one of your own, polite and careful.
“Luckily, the director hasn’t arrived yet, so it’s not a problem,” you said. “Apparently, he’s strict on everyone but himself.”
Yukimiya winced as a heap of clothes was thrown at him and the finishing touches were placed on his chestnut hair. You watched him with amusement, your hands folded in your lap as he was yanked to his feet.
“Guess I got lucky this time, then,” he said, stumbling into the dressing room, the door slamming shut behind him. You stood yourself, stretching your arms and legs with a deep breath, rolling your ankles in the air, alternating as you did so, and then pacing back and forth in an attempt to accustom yourself to the monstrosities that your feet had been shoved into.
The man in the corner didn’t seem affected by the chaos Yukimiya’s appearance had thrown everyone into. You thought you saw something like a snort escape him, but otherwise he was calm — although you noticed he had tucked his phone away and shoved his hands in his pockets, opting to instead observe his surroundings with a soft curiosity.
You turned away before he could shift his attention to you once again, because your pride could not handle being caught by him a second time, and you pretended like you were entirely fascinated with putting one foot in front of the other, walking in a line so straight it was as if it had been drawn with a ruler.
Yukimiya reappeared completely ready a few seconds later, tying the laces of his dress shoes and then joining you at your side, although of course he did not need to practice walking or anything so silly. Like most men, he had been afforded the luxury of comfort; he wasn’t the showpiece of this edition, after all. You were, and so you were the one made up into a spectacle beyond natural ability or attempt.
“Everyone, in your places!” the director shouted as he entered the studio, a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the other on his hip. He was diminutive in stature and wore a ridiculously feathered hat, but what he lacked in height, he more than made up for in position, so nobody would dare to say that to him, least of all you, who could so easily be replaced.
Still, for one final time, you allowed yourself to look at the man standing all by himself, wondering if he’d offer some reaction to the getup, some indication that you weren’t alone in your feelings. You weren’t sure why it was him who you sought out; perhaps because he, unlike everyone else, was a mystery, an enigma, and so while you could map out without knowing what all the other faces in the room looked like at that moment, you needed to see his to understand it.
He wrinkled his nose into a snicker, shaking his head like he couldn’t quite believe his eyes, and then he took his phone back out of his pocket, maybe to give himself an excuse for laughing. It wasn’t like he really needed an excuse, because no one else was even looking at him, but then again, there was never any harm in caution.
“You’re Y/N L/N, right?” Yukimiya said to you, his hand on your shoulder as you faced the camera, waiting for the director to adjust your stances. “It’s a pleasure. I’m surprised this is the first time we’re actually talking.”
“The pleasure is mine,” you said. “And yes, it’s a wonder we haven’t worked together before, given how frequently I’ve heard your name mentioned. I’m looking forward to it.”
Something about Yukimiya served to enhance everyone he was around, and so, instead of stealing the attention from you, he somehow managed to direct the spotlight so that it shone only on your placid face. You had been expecting the opposite, but you weren’t angry about it; in fact, you couldn’t have been more pleased. It was always the worst thing when your coworker was jostling you out of the way for a few extra seconds in front of the cameras, and you thought to yourself that you’d have to find some way of ensuring you were booked with him more often.
“Amazing! I don’t think I’ve ever been so quickly satisfied by a shoot!” the director said, clapping his hands together and nodding at you both. “Excellent work. I think we can wrap up for the day. I’ll see you two here at the same time tomorrow!”
“Wow,” Yukimiya said as everyone started disassembling the set. “I thought you said he was strict.”
You shrugged as you walked over to the dressing rooms. “I thought he was.”
“Well, we probably shouldn’t complain,” he said. “Between this and practice, my schedule is booked. I have no space to be ungrateful about a little extra time.”
“Very true,” you said. “It’s always nice when things like this end sooner than anticipated. Better than later, anyways.”
The first thing you took off were those excuses for shoes, kicking them under the door for good measure and shoving your feet into a pair of fluffy slippers, wiggling your toes with a sigh. Peeling off every layer you had squeezed into for the sake of the director’s creative vision, you curled up on the bench in only your underwear, sipping on water through a metal straw and staring at the wall, hugging your knees to your chest, lost in thinking about nothing.
Only when you grew cold did you stand, pulling on a sweatshirt three sizes too large and sweatpants that puddled at your shoes, shielding you from the world as you trudged out of the dressing room, wanting to rub your eyes but knowing that you would smear makeup all over the backs of your hands. You settled instead for playing with the thread you had taped to the handle of your water bottle for exactly such an occasion, twirling the loose ends of the meticulous knots in between your fingers idly.
“Ah — L/N!” Yukimiya waved at you as you made your way towards the exit. Unaccustomed to further camaraderie after the end of the workday, you had to fight to keep your expression neutral, and when you noticed the man from earlier was at Yukimiya’s side, the lollipop long gone, you had to fight even harder.
“Is something the matter?” you said.
“No, nothing at all,” he said. “I just figured we might as well walk to the parking garage together, since it’s late and all.”
“I appreciate it,” you said. The studio you were at had only one security guard in its employ, a man that inspired pity more than fear, with a few strands of hair glued into a desperate attempt at a combover and a shirt that was far too thin to be considered professional, so you hadn’t even considered asking for an escort, figuring you would take your chances. Still, the thought of walking alone wasn’t the most appealing, and while you wouldn’t have asked for it yourself, you were glad Yukimiya had offered his company nonetheless.
“Oh! Karasu, this is Y/N L/N. L/N, this is Tabito Karasu,” Yukimiya said as you reached the door and the other man — Karasu — used one black-gloved hand to open it.
“Is he your bodyguard or something? Thank you,” you said, nodding at Karasu for holding the door.
“He wishes,” Karasu said. His voice was rough and deep and sounded like he was perpetually in on some private joke, but you didn’t mind it, not in the slightest. “I’m his roommate — the one with a car, by the way. And a driver’s license. And the time to pick his sorry ass up.”
“What he means is that he offered to stop by on his way home to get me,” Yukimiya said.
“That’s very generous of you,” you said. “Especially considering you were there even before Yukimiya was.”
“Don’t you think? It’s fine, now he owes me one,” Karasu said, his eyes glimmering. “And I intend to collect, of course.”
“He never does anything out of the goodness of his heart,” Yukimiya said with a long-suffering sigh. “You better be careful around him, L/N. Whatever he gives you, he’ll expect the same in return.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” you said, though of course you had no intentions of ever being around Karasu in any way that mattered.
“We play soccer for the Japanese team, you know,” Karasu said. “You should come to one of our games, L/N. I’m sure some of our teammates would be delighted by that. Right, Yuki?”
Yukimiya sighed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “If you’re talking about Otoya and Aiku, then yes, but that’s not necessarily a good thing.”
“Not for her, it isn’t,” Karasu said. “For them, sure it is. But I wasn’t talking about those two, anyways.”
“Pardon?” you said.
“Ignore him,” Yukimiya said. “I don’t really know what he’s going on about.”
“It was nice meeting you,” Karasu said, picking up before Yukimiya on the fact that your steps had stuttered to a stop. “L/N, was it?”
He offered you his hand. You took it and shook, arching a brow at the firmness of his grip, which was much more in line with a businessman than a soccer player. 
“Yes,” you said. “Karasu? It was nice to meet you as well.”
“Don’t worry,” Yukimiya said, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “I’ll make my other roommate pick me up tomorrow.”
“Otoya?” Karasu said. “Good luck with that. He’ll be late to his own funeral, so don’t think you’re high on his priority list. The only time he comes early is—”
“Karasu,” Yukimiya interjected. “Don’t be crass.”
“Sure, sure,” he said. “See you around, L/N. Or maybe not.”
“See you,” you said, starting your car so that it wasn’t freezing when you got in, deciding it wouldn’t be polite to tack on a definitely not to the farewell and instead opting to stay silent.
“Bye, L/N,” Yukimiya said. “Until tomorrow.”
Although your apartment wasn’t large by any means, it wasn’t small, either, sitting at a comfortable medium that was paid for half by you and half by your brother, who was hardly ever home, anyways, but needed somewhere for his mail to be delivered. He was a free spirit, always traveling: for work, for fun, for women and wine, for anything his heart desired, which left you the entire space to yourself more often than not. People were jealous of you when they found out, but when you sat on the couch alone, a blanket pulled up around your shoulders and a bowl of salad held in between your knees, the television on only to ward away the silence that permeated the room, you wondered what they had to be jealous of.
The next day, you didn’t look for Karasu when you entered the studio, but you knew as you stepped in that he wasn’t there. There was something missing, the room a little brighter without him in the corner, waiting with an unmatched patience for Yukimiya to be done. Yukimiya must’ve made good on his threat, then, to call their other roommate to pick him up, although privately you wondered why he couldn’t just drive himself.
The shoot went even smoother the second day than it had the first, and it was a surprise the director didn’t fall to your feet and grovel at the speed with which you executed his vision. Yukimiya struck that perfect balance of workmanlike and personable, and you were content to play along with him, so all in all things moved with relative swiftness.
When you went to leave, you noticed that Yukimiya was standing by the door on his own, tapping his phone furiously. You were under no obligation to stop, but for some reason, you did, waiting awkwardly for a second before clearing your throat.
“Is everything alright?” you said. He startled, almost dropping his phone as he blinked at you.
“Yes! Yes, it’s fine, it’s just my roommate is a jerk, that’s all. Last night, he told me he was fine with picking me up, but now all of a sudden he’s busy,” he said with a scoff.
“Otoya, right?” you said. Yukimiya cocked his head.
“Yes, how’d you know?” he said.
“Karasu — your other roommate mentioned him yesterday,” you said, correcting yourself so that it didn’t seem like Karasu was someone you paid special attention to. Judging by Yukimiya’s expression, you didn’t think you had been entirely successful in the attempt, which was unlike you. You bit the tip of your tongue so that you didn’t say anything further, waiting for him to respond.
“Right,” he said.
“Why don’t you drive yourself?” you said, crossing your arms and standing beside him, facing the road as he was. 
“I can’t,” he said.
“You never learned?” you said. He shook his head, adjusting his glasses self-consciously.
“It’s not recommended I do,” he said. He didn’t elaborate further, but he didn’t have to; you recognized it wasn’t your place and hummed in acknowledgement.
“If you want, I don’t mind taking you,” you said. You didn’t know where Yukimiya lived — for all you knew, it was across the city entirely — but it didn’t hurt to extend your hand like that, especially because you had a sense that he wouldn’t even accept it.
“It’s alright,” Yukimiya said. “Karasu said he’s on his way, since last he checked, Otoya’s in the shower now, for some reason.”
“Oh,” you said. “That’s kind of him.”
“Kind?” Yukimiya said, and then to your surprise, he laughed. “I wish I knew as little about him as you do.”
“Is he a bad person?” you said.
“Not at all,” Yukimiya said. “He’s great. He’s one of my best friends, in fact; it’s just that kind and Karasu rarely if ever go together in the same sentence.”
“How can someone be your best friend if you don’t even think they’re kind?” you said, intrigued by the puzzle Yukimiya had presented you with. The way he spoke of Karasu, it was as if he were some willful spirit that occasionally deigned to lend his aid to those who could bring him some benefit, but the way the two of them treated one another didn’t seem anything like that.
“I don’t know,” Yukimiya said. “If you knew him better, I wouldn’t have to explain this. He’s a hard person to understand, and just when you think you’ve finally got it, he goes and complicates things further.”
“That sounds exhausting,” you said.
“That’s the strangest thing about it all,” Yukimiya said as a car pulled up in front of you both, the hazard lights turning on. “With him, it’s entirely natural.”
Karasu stepped out of the driver’s side, shutting it behind him and joining the two of you on the curb, grinning at Yukimiya in a way that almost felt mocking.
“Told you Otoya wasn’t to be trusted,” he said. “You’re paying for dinner.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Yukimiya said, tossing his bag at Karasu, who caught it without flinching. “Put this in for me.”
“Whatever you say,” Karasu said, opening the back door of the car and throwing the bag onto the floor before slamming it shut and patting the handle for good measure. “Is that everything, your royal highness?”
“Yes,” Yukimiya said. “I’m going to kill Otoya when we get back.”
“Hm,” Karasu said. “Violent.”
“He deserves it,” Yukimiya said. “Bye, L/N. Thanks for waiting with me.”
“It’s not an issue,” you said, especially because you hadn’t done it on purpose, and even if you had, it hadn’t been for him. “I’m glad everything worked out.”
You wanted to say something more, something to Karasu in particular, but you didn’t know what or how. It wasn’t like you knew him — not a little and not at all, as Yukimiya had pointed out, and indeed you had no reason to speak to him in the first place. He wasn’t anything but your coworker’s roommate, so what did he mean to you?
Yukimiya shut his door with a hurried apology about the cold, and then it was just you and Karasu on the curb, and you couldn’t tell why, but the way he looked at you made you think he could hear every thought which was racing through your mind. 
“Yukimiya’s right. It’s cold out,” he said. “You should go home now.”
“I’m just about to,” you said.
“Are you?” he said. 
“Why are you questioning that?” you said, surprisingly affronted, although he hadn’t said anything insulting. “Of course I am. It’s not like I have anywhere else to go.”
“I’m not questioning anything,” he said. “Drive safely.”
“Wait,” you said. “Will you be here tomorrow?”
“Would you prefer it if I am?” he said.
“I’d prefer it if you answered my questions instead of coming up with more of your own,” you said, which you thought would be met with shock — after all, it was a rare thing that you broke character and said anything that could be perceived as cutting — but was instead received with a snicker.
“Yes,” he said. “I’ll be here tomorrow. Early, if that’s what you want.”
“It doesn’t matter to me,” you said. “Do what you’d like.”
“I think that I will,” he said, and then Yukimiya was rolling down the window, telling him to hurry up, damnit, so he left you behind without another word, the car’s engine purring as they drove away.
You must’ve looked like such a fool the next morning, the final of the shoot, your eyes immediately going to the corner where Karasu had been that first day. It was empty, and despite yourself, your shoulders slumped when you realized that he wasn’t there, which was enough for you to break out of that strange trance. Why had you even hoped in the first place? He had made no indication that he was going to come, and you were old enough to know that hoping and wishing were certain paths to disappointment.
“Do you want me to take you back tonight?” you asked Yukimiya, sitting in a chair beside him as you waited for the director to come. It was a clumsy and roundabout way of getting to what you actually wanted out of him, but the last thing you could do was tell him the truth. What would he say, if he knew why you were actually offering? What would he think of you then?
“Hm? No, it’s fine, Karasu’s already got it. He’s at the gym with Shidou — er, another teammate of ours — right now, but he’ll be done before we are, and the studio’s closer to the gym than our apartment is, so he told me it wouldn’t be any extra trouble,” he said, and you thought he must’ve added those extra details for the sole purpose of seeing what your response to them would be, but then you remembered that Yukimiya wasn’t that kind of person. He was just telling you as a way to fill the time, not to get one over you or anything like that.
“That’s good,” you said. “Convenient.”
“Yup,” Yukimiya said. “My agent told me we’d be doing individual photos today.”
“Huh?” you said. “Oh, right. Yes, I think that’s the case.”
“That’s a shame. I enjoyed working with you,” he said.
“Me, too,” you said, and unlike most times, you weren’t lying when you did. “I’m sure we’ll meet again soon, though. There’s not so many of us our age.”
“True,” he said. “It’s a given.”
“Exactly,” you said.
“Yukimiya! You’re up first!” the director shouted, entering as he always did — like a whirlwind, leaving papers scattered and assistants flustered in his wake. 
“That’s my cue,” Yukimiya said with a long-suffering sigh.
“Good luck,” you said, glad that it wasn’t your turn just yet. The shoes you were meant to wear sat innocently before you, about two feet away, and although it was impossible for inanimate objects to be snide, they were quite close to it, glaring at you with their bejeweled straps and their impossible tall heels, tittering between themselves at the thought of the cuts already forming on your ankles, the bandages you’d have to remove in order for those terrors to slide on without fuss.
You set your water bottle on the armrest of your chair, taking up the thread and crossing it over itself in the patterns you had been taught in elementary school. You didn’t have anyone to tie these bracelets around, and you couldn’t wear them yourself, for they’d be cut away almost immediately, but the repetitive motions soothed your mind, distracting you from the red soaking through your white socks.
“L/N!” the director screamed, even though you were sitting right there and could hear him perfectly fine. “Put your damn shoes on and get the hell up here!”
Without Yukimiya there to soften the blow, you were the direct target of all of his anger. Swallowing back every emotion you had ever felt and would ever feel, you bent over and began to rip the nude-colored band-aids, stained rusty at the edges, off. Balling them up and throwing them in the trash, you stood on aching soles and pulled the shoes on, one after another, clenching your teeth and taking off your sweater so that you could waltz over to where the cameras were trained.
“Took you long enough,” the director groused. 
“Yes, sir,” you said. “How should I stand?”
“Just put your hands there, and your one leg there,” the director said vaguely, waving his arms about before striking what must’ve been an approximation of the pose he wanted you to take. You did your best to copy it, and the cameras went off, your vision temporarily fleeing and then coming back in spots as the lights faded. “No!”
“No?” you said.
“That’s all wrong! It’s horrible, horrible — you’re not even trying to do what I asked!” he said. “Yukimiya could do it, so why can’t you? Just do this!”
He did the same thing again. You weren’t sure what else you could adjust, but you moved slightly, twisting your torso at a different angle and smiling without your teeth this time. He grunted and motioned for the cameras to go again, but after a few more photos, he groaned, dragging his face over his hands.
“This is horrendous! You look entirely stiff and posed. It’s like you're a mannequin!” he said.
“I don’t — I’m not — what should I fix?” you said, unable to stop nerves from creeping into your voice and jostling it about. As difficult as he was to work with, you knew that the director was a big name in the industry, and if he only had bad things to say about you, then your entire livelihood would be threatened.
“Ugh!” he said, stomping onto the set and grabbing your arm, wrenching it down so hard you were surprised it didn’t dislocate. You chewed on the frayed flesh of the inside of your cheek to keep from yelping, allowing yourself to be pliable as he dragged your leg forward into what he wanted from you. “It’s like you’re a completely different person today! Just disappointing.”
Whatever position he had coerced you into was nothing like the one he had wanted you to imitate, but you refrained from pointing that out, holding it in place while the photographers adjusted their lenses. It was uncomfortable and made the lace lining your collar dig into your throat even more, but at least that served as a reminder for you to be silent.
“That’s enough,” the director said, massaging his temples. “We’re not getting anything more out of you.”
“What?” you said, standing normally, tired of contorting yourself for the impossible-to-please man. “What do you mean?”
“You’re lifeless. I don’t know how you managed to fool me yesterday and the day before, but I see it now. Honestly, if it weren’t for the concerning accusations I’d face, I’d just dig up a grave and pay the families half the royalties. It’d be a cheaper and better performance than whatever you’re giving me,” he said.
“What?” you said again, shame pouring over you, cold in a way that was closer to heat, ringing in your ears and coating your tongue. You couldn’t think of another response, any other way to defend yourself. If he was saying it, then it really was the truth. You swallowed, about to bow your head and shuffle off of the set for good, but then, like a bird in your peripheral vision, you noticed someone standing in the corner.
It was Karasu, and he was muffling a laugh. When he noticed you were looking at him, he dropped his hand from in front of his mouth and jerked his head towards the director, mouthing something that looked suspiciously like get a load of this guy. Your eyes widened, and then you, too, were fighting back a giggle, because you were so tired of the entire charade and your feet hurt and you wanted to go home and sleep for a few hours but this director, this stupid fucking director, couldn’t make up his mind about what he wanted from you. And now your career was ruined and you’d go back to waiting tables and Karasu was standing there, which was ridiculous, because where had even come from? But, then again, did it matter? Because the most amazing thing of all was that he was laughing. The situation was horrible and he was laughing as if it was the most entertaining moment of his life.
“There!”
You cringed as the cameras went off in quick succession, but they were faster than you, and you knew for sure they had caught you before you had cowered away. The director stroked his chin, and then, to your surprise, clicked his tongue in approval.
“Well done,” he said. “That’s the kind of genuine appeal I was looking for. If you can bring more of that to the table, then anyone would be happy to have you.”
You frowned, his sudden switch in mood giving you whiplash. Only seconds earlier, he had been berating you, and now he was praising you? You couldn’t understand what had brought about the change, but you were at least quick enough to not question it. 
“Thank you,” you said. “I appreciate the advice. And the opportunity to work with you.”
“I’ll hire you again,” he said, which sounded as much like a threat as it did a promise. “We’ll bring it out of you. Now that I know what you’re capable of, I won’t rest until I’ve perfected it in the way only I can.”
The thought of being perfected by him, molded and shaped and honed, was the most unappealing you had had in a while. You could imagine him tugging your limbs out of their sockets, rearranging them at his leisure, slicing gashes into your skin so that his clothes and accessories sat better, smoother, without unappealing wrinkles or reflections marring their surfaces.
“Thank you,” you said once more. “It’s an honor.”
“Are you alright?” Yukimiya said when you wobbled over to where your shoes and clothes were strewn about. 
“I’m fine,” you said, but you weren’t looking at him. Your distracted eyes were following Karasu as he left the studio, your eyebrows knitting together as you tried to ascertain what the point of him even coming inside had been, if he was going to leave without you — without Yukimiya. 
He didn’t come for you, a voice in the back of your head, sounding eerily similar to the director’s, said. He came to pick up his roommate, just like he promised he would.
“I can’t believe he chose you as his favorite. Maybe you’ll be his muse for the next few years!” Yukimiya said. The director was known for picking one model to fixate on for an extended period of time. His every project revolved around them, and they were catapulted into unprecedented stardom under his guiding hand, staying there until their retirement. It was everyone’s dream, and you should’ve been happy at the prospect of being next in that line, but when you beamed at Yukimiya, it was fake, the muscles in your mouth straining at the unnatural position you were putting them into.
“Who knows?” you said. “I don’t want to rely on it. It’s not a guarantee.”
“Smart idea,” he said, scrunching up his face. “I’m sorry. I’m used to soccer more than all of this. Everyone’s very…full of themselves.”
“You’re not full of yourself,” you said, shutting the door of your dressing room behind you and calling through it as you changed, hoping to delay him even slightly.
“You’ve never seen me on the field,” he said. “There, everyone’s different. You have to be, if you want to live. Ego’s a form of survival out there.”
“Doesn’t sound much different than modeling,” you said.
“A little different,” he said. “People here are just vain. That’s not the same.”
You hadn’t ever gotten changed so quickly, but in record time, you were swinging your bag over your shoulder and rejoining Yukimiya, who seemed as surprised as you were that you had finished so quickly. After all, you had a bit of a reputation for…sulking? Brooding? You weren’t sure what word they were using for it nowadays, but regardless, your proclivity for sitting in your dressing room in silence was well-known, as much a part of your character as it was a habit. 
“You’re not wrong about that,” you said. “But vanity’s a necessary evil, I think. If you want to succeed.”
“Er, right,” he said, standing in place like he was unsure of how to react. “I suppose so.”
When you did not halt but instead kept moving towards the exit, he straightened and hurried after you. You weren’t going very fast, and his strides were so long that he caught up with you before you could even brace for the biting wind that rushed in as soon as you opened the door. The two of you went along in silence, Yukimiya obviously befuddled why you were still with him but too polite to say anything about it, and it was only when you reached the entrance to the parking garage, where a familiar car was waiting, that you allowed yourself to smile.
“Man, talk about an asshole,” Karasu said, stretching like a cat as he got out of the still-running sedan. “That director is a piece of work.”
“Karasu!” Yukimiya reprimanded, which got him nothing but a sly smile from the man in question. “He’s our boss. We can’t say stuff like that about him.”
“He’s your boss,” Karasu corrected. “So you can’t say stuff like that. I can say whatever I want.”
“You’re going to get me fired,” Yukimiya said. “It’s a good thing I have soccer to fall back on, or else I’d be in trouble.”
“Go sit in the car, then, if you want to stay blameless,” Karasu said.  
“I will! And you better not bother poor L/N. I don’t want her to have a bad opinion of all of us just because of you,” Yukimiya said, jabbing his finger at Karasu, who raised his hands in the air innocently.
Today, he wore a white windbreaker over a grey shirt, and because he was not wearing gloves, you could see that there were calluses on his palms, standing out pale at the seams of his fingers. You weren’t used to seeing calluses on anyone, not when the few people you met on a semi-regular basis took such diligent measures to prevent them, but now that you were faced with them sans demonization, you found their roughness was warm and friendly, not hideous.
“He was pretty bad,” you mumbled as soon as Yukimiya had shut himself away in the car. 
“Yuki, or the director?” Karasu said.
“Don’t be horrible,” you said. “You know who I’m talking about.”
“I can’t believe he compared you to a dead body,” Karasu said.
“That’s not the worst I’ve gotten,” you said. “It took me by surprise because things had been going so well until then, but he was relatively tame, all things considered.”
“Really?” Karasu said. 
“Yes,” you said, dropping your voice to a murmur in case anyone was around, not wanting to give yourself a reputation as a whiner. “Once, someone asked me if my mother was a fish, because there was no other explanation for how I was flopping around.”
“That’s rude,” he said.
“It was!” you said. No one had ever listened to you before, least of all with such a benign expression on their face, and you were so starved of it that you could not contain yourself any longer. “Especially because I was standing still, not flopping around or whatever. Honestly, I wanted to ask him if his mother was a fish, because you know what? There was no other explanation for how he smelled!”
“Horrid!” Karasu said, beaming at you. “You should’ve.”
“Oh, no, no, I couldn’t. I shouldn’t even have said it to you,” you said, shaking your head and pressing your hands over your mouth, unsure of any other method of stopping yourself that would be nearly as effective. 
“But you did,” he said, zipping up his jacket in a swift movement. “I’ll think of something about myself to tell you in return. Give me a day or two.”
“That’s not why I did that,” you protested. “And we don’t have a day or two, anyways, so you’ll have to do it now or never again.”
“Sure we do,” he said. “We live in the same city, don’t we? I bet our paths will cross. Where do you go grocery shopping?”
“Grocery shopping?” you said.
“Karasu! You’re low on gas!” Yukimiya said, rolling down his window. 
“I go to the place across from the park on South 18th Street. Every Thursday after practice,” Karasu said. “Meet all sorts of people there. Never know who I’m going to run into.”
You could picture exactly the store he was talking about; it wasn’t where you typically went, but sometimes, if you were running low on something hard to find, you’d walk the extra few blocks. It was much bigger than the one close to your apartment, after all, and suddenly you wondered if you had seen Karasu there before, if you had seen him ten or twenty times and just not noticed.
“When do you finish practice?” you said, right before he got into his car. 
“Lunchtime,” he said. “I’m hungry more often than not.”
“It’s not good to shop for food when you’re hungry,” you said.
“Then I’ll have to do something about it before I do,” he said. “Well, it depends. Only if I have good company.”
You didn’t realize until you were halfway home what he meant by that, and by then it was too late for you to change your mind — not that you would’ve. Not that you needed to. He wasn’t holding you to anything, even though you knew as well as he did that you would be there; still, ultimately it was your decision. Your choice. 
That was a strange characteristic of his, one that Yukimiya hadn’t mentioned. Karasu didn’t ask for things; he didn’t command them, either. He only made suggestions, nudging you along until you reached the destination that he wanted you to arrive at. You had never met a person quite so adept at it, at presenting choices and questions as disguises for inevitabilities, at guiding people’s thoughts so precisely. It would’ve been unsettling coming from anyone else, but from him, it was natural. It was how he operated. Who were you to chafe at it when that was simply who he was?
The grocery store was large, but they never changed their layout, so you knew where everything was familiarly and without checking the signs. You didn’t have anything to shop for, so you decided to wander the aisles, thinking that if something caught your eye, you’d buy it without further consideration.
You found yourself staring at a bag of oranges, a bright red 50% Off! sticker slapped right on the netted packaging. Swallowing, you reached for it, but before you could, someone snatched them away, holding them in the air teasingly.
“I thought you shouldn’t shop for food when you’re hungry,” Karasu said. “And might I add, what a coincidence it is, seeing you here!”
“I’m not hungry,” you said, taking the oranges back and holding them to your chest protectively. “And I wasn’t looking for you.”
“I didn’t say that you were,” he said. “I distinctly recall saying that it was a coincidence we even met, in fact. Anyways, maybe you’re not hungry, but I am, so I should be off. Meals to eat, shopping lists to plan…it’s a busy life I have.”
“Sounds mundane,” you said. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” he said. “You’re right. That reminds me! Before I go, what is it that should I tell you?”
You couldn’t deny that that was the real reason for why you had come to the grocery store — what was he going to reveal? For as much as he knew about you, you knew frighteningly little about him, and now that you were faced with a chance to learn what kind of person he really was, you didn’t want to let it leave your grasp.
“Whatever you want,” you said. He plucked the oranges from your grasp again, and before you could complain, set them at the bottom of the small basket he held in his arms.
“How about this? I knew you were going to go for the oranges,” he said.
“How?” you said.
His eyes sparkled as he leaned closer to you, and you suddenly remembered Yukimiya’s warnings. Whatever you thought you knew about Karasu, it was likely only half or maybe a quarter the truth. Really, he was shifting and cunning, a fox and a crow, far from comprehension, not a danger but not kind, either.
“I’ll answer if you tell me something else about yourself,” he said.
“Why are you acting like I’m entering some kind of contract with a devil?” you said.
“I’m not a devil,” he said. “Just Karasu. My teammates think I’m a great guy, if the recommendation sets you at ease.”
“It sounds more like you’re trying to blackmail me,” you said. He shook his head.
“Couldn’t it be said that you’re doing the same? You’re asking questions about me and expecting that I answer when you have no intentions of reciprocating,” he said. 
You pouted, because when he put it like that, he wasn’t wrong, and it wasn’t that you didn’t trust him — because you did. You trusted him more than you should’ve, considering how guarded you had learned to become.
“I have an older brother,” you said. “He’s overseas right now. I don’t think he’ll be back for a while.”
“I have an older sister,” Karasu said. “Maybe they know each other.”
“Probably don’t,” you said. “Also, you didn’t answer my question.”
“I guess I didn’t,” he said, reaching around you to take two boxes of cereal off of a shelf. “Try again.”
“My parents didn’t want me to be a model,” you said. “They thought I should be a teacher. I’m good at it. Children like me.”
“I was going to go into investment banking,” he said. “Or consulting. One of those such fields. Maybe I still will, but soccer is fine for now.”
This was a game for him, you realized. Like tennis, but better, and so, instead of being irritated, you decided you might as well indulge it. It had been so long, anyways, since the last time you had spoken to someone freely, without concern for what they might spread about you, whose ears they would whisper your secrets in just to get one or two steps ahead.
“I threw a dress at a designer’s face once,” you said. “He didn’t like the shade of lipstick I was wearing, even though he was the one that picked it. The only reason my reputation wasn’t ruined was because he ended up liking the way the lipstick turned up digitally and promised not to say anything about it if I allowed them to use my photos after all.”
Karasu laughed, opening the doors to the fridge and taking out milk, stacking it neatly in the basket. You weren’t sure when the two of you had begun shopping in earnest, but it seemed he had forgotten about his plans to eat lunch. 
“In high school, my teammate pissed me off, so I made sure to shove him around extra when we tried out for a nearby youth team. It made him look so inept that he didn’t make the cut,” he said, taking an abandoned cart and depositing his things in it, motioning for you to put your purse in as well.
“That’s mean!” you said, but it was hard to disguise the fact that you, too, were laughing. “You’re mean.”
“His fault. He should’ve played better, anyways,” Karasu said. “I had been helping his sorry ass out for too long. He would’ve been cut regardless. You could say I just…expedited the process.”
“I’m the only one in my family who still wishes my brother happy birthday,” you said. “He’s a disappointment in everyone else’s eyes, but he lets me live with him and pays his share of the bills, so how can I disown him?”
“Between the two of us, my sister is the perfect one, so I’m afraid I can’t relate. Vanilla or hazelnut?” he said without skipping a beat. Before you could even answer, he face-palmed. “Oh, wait, Otoya hates hazelnut. I’ll get that so he doesn’t mistake it for his own.”
“I used to be a waitress,” you said. “Before I was a model. It was a lot less glamorous of a career. I don’t think my feet ever recovered from it.”
“I’m sure those shoes that you were forced into for your last job didn’t help any,” he said. “They looked inhumane.”
“They were,” you said, your ankles panging at the reminder, still inflamed and angry as they were. “Though I think anyone would’ve suffered with them on. I doubt the designer had human anatomy in mind when making them; I haven’t bled like that in a while.”
“They made you bleed?” he said. You hummed.
“Yeah,” you said, seeing no point in lying. Who would he tell? Who would even believe him? “Fashion over function, right? It was only for a few photos. They’ll be healed so quickly I’ll forget I had them in the first place. Enough about me, though. Tell me something else about yourself.”
“I sprained my wrist playing soccer as a kid,” he said. “It was a long time ago, but even now, I can feel it when it rains.”
He still hadn’t answered your original question, and you didn’t think he would, not until you offered him something of equal or greater value. But what did you have like that? What aspect of your silly life held enough weight that it would make someone like Karasu, always so ready with his wit and his charm, willing to part with something he clearly deemed to be a secret?
“I’m lonely,” you said, turning away from him, pretending to be fascinated with comparing two different brands of yogurt, neither of which you would buy. “You’ll laugh, but I think this is the longest conversation I’ve had with someone outside of work since my brother last came home. It’s nice, surprisingly. Talking to you and all. I like it.”
Or maybe you just liked him. You couldn’t really separate the two. Either way, it remained that ever since you had met Karasu, you could not conceive of a time when you had not known him, a time when you had gone home to your empty apartment and watched your empty shows and eaten your empty salads and thought you were satisfied by it all. You doubted he knew he had this effect, and you certainly wouldn’t be the one to tell him — after all, he’d probably be frightened if he found out that you had, in such a short time, grown so attached to him and his games and his conduct.
“The oranges,” he said. “You tried to buy them the first time I saw you.”
“What?” you said. Now it was his turn to avert his eyes and yours to watch him in fascination, finding it far easier to stomach a secret than to spit it out.
“It was a long time ago, but it was definitely you,” he said. “It was a Thursday, and I was just coming back from practice; this grocery store is far from my apartment but close enough to the field that, when Otoya — he was sick, so he had skipped that day — texted me that we were out of bread, I decided I’d make the detour. I wasn’t planning on staying here long, but right when I was about to leave, I saw you. You only had a packet of instant noodles and a bag of oranges in your hands. They were on sale back then, too, but—”
“But I had to put them back,” you finished for him, remembering that day as well as he did, albeit not his role. “Because I didn’t have enough money to get them, even when they were 50% off.”
“Yes,” he said. “I left before you noticed me, but I always — I always wish I hadn’t. I kept making the trip here, doing my shopping every Thursday at the same time until it became ingrained in me like routine, and I told myself if I ever saw you again, I’d buy them for you.”
“I can buy my own oranges now,” you said.
“I know,” he said. “That wasn’t the only reason I came back each week.”
“Why else?” you said.
“Well,” he said. “I can’t just tell you everything in one go like that, can I?”
You scoffed. “You can.”
“But I won’t,” he said.
“But you won’t,” you said with a sigh. “Anyways. So you knew me even before we met?”
“I knew of you,” he corrected you. “Though not as a model. Just as an absurdly beautiful girl I saw in a supermarket once and thought about occasionally.”
“So it was a coincidence that you happened to be at that shoot?” you said, raising an eyebrow at him.
“When Yukimiya told us about the girl he’d be working with, Otoya looked you up,” he said. “And despite how long it had been since you last crossed my mind as well as how much longer it had been since the only time I saw you in the flesh, I recognized you immediately.”
“You have a good memory,” you said.
“So I’ve been told,” he said. “I didn’t go with any strange intentions, if you’re wondering. I only wanted to know what kind of person you actually were.”
He wasn’t a typical admirer, taken with your celebrity or your status. He was curious, not about Y/N L/N the model, but you, the girl he nearly met in a grocery store so long ago it was all but inconsequential. You wondered what it said about you that instead of being wary, you only felt all the more inclined to reveal yourself to him. You wondered if this was some lack of self-preservation, as your brother would declare it, or if this was an innate knowledge, an instinctual understanding that the man before you was different.
Maybe he was or maybe he wasn’t. You didn’t know, and maybe, on some level, you didn’t care. Taking his hand, you set it on the bag of oranges, placing your own atop it firmly, your thumb tracing his scratched knuckles.
“Buy them for me,” you said. “And I’ll tell you who I am, plainly and without fuss.”
“Is that what you consider a good deal?” he said. “I’d say you’re a bit more valuable than a discount bag of oranges.”
“Do you think so?” you said. “Fine, then. The oranges, and a pack of instant noodles.”
“Closer,” he said. “But I’m a fair person. I can’t accept.”
“You,” you said, all in a rush. “The oranges, the noodles, and you. That’s my final offer. I’ll give you everything if you give me that much.”
He didn’t even pretend to consider it. You thought that it must’ve been what he was waiting for all along, what he had been, in that way of his, leading you towards.
“You’re a tough bargainer,” he said.
“So you agree to it?” you said.
“Sure,” he said, and when he noticed your face falling at the noncommittal nature of his acceptance, he laughed. “Yes. Yes, yes, I agree. The oranges, the noodles, and me; you can have all three as you please.”
And it was odd, but just for a moment, the reprieve lasting only for as long as his breathy chuckle, your feet ceased to ache.
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unsuredreamer · 6 months ago
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Would you? Maybe
Chloe Charming 💙 x fem!reader
Here you go my loves, I hope you like it! If you do and want more let me know!
I'm also up for ideas 🙌🏻
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Auradon. A seemingly perfect kingdom for anyone, anykind, some people described it as magical even, though there wasn't really anything magical about it, and all kinds of magic were long forgotten here, some forbidden.
A place where people aren't as kind as they are pictured to be, most of them even crueler than the worst villains. You would have thought differently.
Being sent here after told fairytales, you'd expect royals to be nice, welcoming. They might have been, although their children are the real pain in the ass.
You were wondering, why has your dad even sent you here?  It's not like you were needed in this world of mortals, well magical mortals.
Don't you think wrongly of course, you always wondered how it is here, and have always dreamt of living here, even just for a while.
It's just.
You'd never expect them to be mean to you purely out of spite? They whispered behind your back, they talked mean,  even laughed at you loudly, which was something not ordinary for you given in that you never once had done something bad.
You have been here for merely 2 months, it was quite a long time for one, but not so much for you, still yet getting used to the time going a bit faster here you haven't really exchanged a word with anyone other than the professors at the school and maybe 2 students.
Well, until now.
A girl with a big shiny sword hung close to her hip bumped right into you. being slightly taller than a normal sized teenager, for a god shrunken to this size, you stood still keeping your posture straight and your head high as taught to you by your dear mother. The girl wasn't so lucky, sat on the ground she groaned in pain.
"I am so so sorry!" You quickly yelled, trying to help the girl to stand, not really being aware of how loud you are. Yet another thing, to get a hold on, being different from your home grounds. "You're just so small and I-I just wasn't looking, and-"
"Hey, get off her! You prideful weirdo!" Another girl came running in, quickly fisting you away from the gorgeous blue haired girl that was just standing hazed 2 feet away.
You always admired her, her total bluntness and a kind hand, her swordsmanship. Welp, you were an observer if you couldn't yet decipher.
"Aye, I'm not prideful, why would you think that?" You shot back at the possessive girl, her gritted teeth told you she was certainly not the kind one.
"You have been nothing but walking around with your head stuck up, like you're all better than anyone here!" She shot fires up you "You're not by the way." glaring she spat out.
"Hey, Red calm down. It's nothin-"
"You better take your 'I'm a god, you better respect me before I make your life a misery' act out of here, before I make you a feast to the Jabberwocky! So much for being exactly like your father" Red, the truly rebellious princess of Wonderland, yelled cutting the other in process. Making a scene out in the gardens of the school.
Of course, you were not totally oblivious to your surroundings, you knew your royals, and your ways around the kingdoms, around Auradon especially. Actually ruling one of yours for quite a short time, you knew better than to get involved in silly high school fights. Being committed to get to know this world better.
You could take any kinds of insults, you really could, an insult she supposedly thought was very harsh. But you actually wanted to be exactly like your father.
Not so much a cocky god. You never thought of yourself as the goddess such great that everyone had to be bowing to you every second they see you.
You were a powerfull being, truly you knew how big of a power you posessed, but making others your play dolls was never in your intention, even when people higher above you insisted on you having maids and others sorta type
But you knew better than to make the girl regret her words, especially because you felt she knew she was wrong deeply in her heart, and also a bit broken. You walked past her, sparing her just a graceful smile and a kind eye.
Stoic you were indeed, no one would question, they just have been so distant as to not anger you? you suppose, you were confused as to why they feared you, not that you would actually do anything while going to school. You were just a kid after all
~•~
Later in the day, that you basically spent just sitting under a willow tree, contemplating of your life. Where you really that bad? Just a cocky god? A stuck up daddy's girl?
Of course you knew this stupid 'argument' if you could call it that, shouldn't vary of you thinking badly of yourself. You were someone after all. (Even though you didn't want to think like that, you had a life experience of being in the presence of literal gods with gods complex, however stupidly it may sound)
Your life-long session of rethinking your life was cut short, due to a loud thud of a sword crashing with the ground. The same gorgeous girl sat there beside you, scarring you in the process.
"Oh im sorry, I should've asked if I could sit-"
"No no, its okay, its not like I have someone to sit with me in the first place" you snorted placing your head ond your knees wrapped up in your hands "I could use some company, it gets so lonely here."
"I'm sorry, Y/n" the girl placed her hand on your shoulder, you jumped at the sudden touch, scared she quickly took it off. You frowned, missing her soft touch already. "for my friend.."
"It's okay, Chloe."
Yes, you knew her name.
How could you not? she was the captain of the Roar team, you grew to like the swording competitions here, lets say they were entertaining...not just for this one particular blue reason..
"She gets defensive quickly, and looses her temperament even quicker, and she's quite hard to maintain, she didn't meant those words I hope you know, you're like- wait" she stopped her rambling "you know my name?"
"I am a god darling, I know everything" You grinned as she looked away, blushing slightly "But so you know I don't use it to my own advantage, it's not like me to be this 'God' everyone thinks of" you shrugged, hiding deeper in your arms.
"You're actually so nice and wise and nothing alike these rumors, not like-" she began, probably wanting to ramble on again but you cut her off. Even though you would love to just listen to her talk for hours on and on.
"My family?"
"Yes" she took a soft breath in as you looked deeper into her soul.
The wind danced briefly around her curls of hair, brown with a mix of blue, she looked astonishing, Her lightly arched brows and deep dark brown eyes held feelings and thoughts you couldn't quite read.
And did you even want to? You could if you insisted on it,, but these were not your intentions for now. Not ever. You'd love to get to know her thoughts, coming only straight from her blabering cutely mouth.
Her soft, pink, plump lips, parted lightly as she exhaled the air, you admired her every feature.
The blue zip up blouse she wore slightly creasing as she sat in the same position as you, turning her head in the direction of the enchanted lake, Her gaze softening with every second she stared at the view before her, dazed, as almost always when she looked at something she really appreciated.
She looked beautiful. She was beautiful
But even those words were an insult in describing such a masterpiece.
She was a piece of art, a muse, the most precious and fragile exhibit in the museum. She was the moment you wanted to live in forever, take in, tresure. She was more than you'd anticipate heaven to be.
"Could you tell me about them? Y/n?"
The way your name rolled off her tounge so perfectly, so smoothly, almost like it was made for just her to say it.
It made you shiver, although you could not have felt the cold, you did feel the goosebumps on your skin. Nothing has ever made you feel like that. Ever.
"What would you like to know princess Charming?" She was a princess and she certainly was charming, creeping her way to your heart, digging a path through the maze of high walls you put up, just to tumble them down the second she looked into your eyes with that hazed expression. With a smile so bright not even the sun could compare. You could not look away, she trapped you into a trance, her orbs like a big rabbit hole dragging you deeper and deeper in.
"How are they like? Are they even a tiny bit like they are described as? Tyranical? Huge? Terrifying?" she took ahold of your leg, clearly needing some sort of physical touch, like she would die without it. Desperate,feeling like you would dissappear in a second, being just a mist, she had imagined you many times.
"They are not. Not much that I think of" You stated grazing her hand, she deeply inhaled at the sudden touch initiated by you, it hasn't gone unnoticed of course.
You took her ring off as you began playing with it. No protests coming from Chloe, as she just admired how swift you were with it, as swift as the queen of hearts with her deck of cards. She observed. "They are a bit fucked in the head, yes. I mean who would declare a war on their sibling?" You laughed, it was truly funny to you, considering it was not that serious as people might think it was "But, they are also just normal beings"
"My father, the one and only, Zeus, is the best father I could ask for, I might even go as far as to say he is a big plush toy, smiling from ear to ear, with a heart so red of love, a true bear" Chloe laughed loudly, showing her amazingly beautiful white teeth and creased eyes.
She was truly charming, living up to her name.
"Trust me, I know some of it" you both giggled, of course she was a daddys girl too.
"He was always so caring, he would spent every second of the day with me if he could, always showing me the best of both worlds, the mortal and the immortal" you stopped "From the begging he used to say I'm going to take his place at the olympus. He said he just knew i was the right one to carry his great legacy, that I had the power within me, uncomparable to his and those of his siblings" you stopped for a second, throwing a pebble in the water "My brother Hercules gave up on being a god for his love" you stopped again looking high in the sky "A ruler of Olympus could never be with a mortal, thus you have to marry a god, if you want to marry at all"
"But that would mean basically marrying your uncles or cousins, wouldn't it? why would anyone choose to marry their cousin?" Chloe looked confused, you just nodded and sighned.
"If you want to have children, you must marry. But I would nerver do that" you looked at her "I want to be the ruler, I have wanted that since I can recall" a tear fell down your face "But i also want to love"
It was only now she got the hand of your features, she alway admired you but not up this close.
You were truly a god, the soft but strong features confused her, you looked so dazzling at the same time looking like you'd tear her alive if she even was thinking of speaking a wrong word to you. Your eyes darted between the trees and the water of the enchanted lake, throwing pebbles with your hands once in a while. You spoke so smoothly, as opposed to how you carried yourself, your tone of voice was like a melody of million playing harps. Looking into the distance, telling her your life story of how you were the gold stained child, always cherished, always praised, but never too much. About how the gods were truly perfect, perfect parents, nothing alike these she was taught about at school all these years ago. She'd never even excpect some things that came out of your mouth would be the truest of truth a few months ago.
Although she alwas caught you cheering everyone on her tournaments. You never once turned down a sweet treat from Zellie, the sweetest student alive. You were always prepared in class. And you were the nicest person alive. All nothing like the gods described in textbooks.
"I have always wanted to fall in love. I suppose I'm sentenced on hundred years of being by myself" you spoke quietly as another tear fell down the same cheek.
Chloe turned to you, wiping the stain off your cheek, staring at your eyes. Her hand lingered in the same place as if it was glued, only her thumb moved ever so slightly, caressing your skin, almost like a ghost touch. Her little smile prominent. You got lost in her, a full force holding you down, not letting you move as much as an inch, fearing she would let go of you almost instantly. You exhaled sharply as her thumb grazed your lips.
"Would you give up on being a god if i told you I loved you?"
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doctorbitchcrxft · 7 months ago
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Croatoan | Supernatural Series Rewrite | Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader (Eventual ? ;) )
Warnings: implied suicidal ideation, canon violence, canon gore, medical stuff lol
Word Count: 6176
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Sam had another vision; one involving Dean killing some dude strapped to a chair. Apparently, the dude had been begging, saying, “It’s not in me!” 
‘What’s not in him, though? A demon? THE demon?’ you thought as he relayed his story.
“Well, I’m sure he had good reason,” you told Sam when he was finished.
“Well, I sure hope so—”
“What does that mean?” Dean grunted.
Sam didn’t reply.
“I mean, I'm not gonna waste an innocent man,” he scoffed.
Sam raised his eyebrows at his brother.
“He wouldn’t, Sam,” you stated, your tone warning.
“I never said he would!”
“Sure seemed implied,” you commented.
“Look, we don't know what it is,” sighed Sam. “But whatever it is, that guy in the chair's a part of it. So let's find him, and see what's what.”
“Fine,” Dean said.
“Fine,” said Sam.
The rest of the drive to Crater Lake, Oregon, was done in silence. 
***
You pulled into the small town of Rivergrove along the main strip of small businesses and homely apartment complexes. Most of the shops almost looked like wooden cabins, and you approached a man sitting under one of the wooden overhangs cleaning a rifle. 
“Morning,” Dean called.
“Good morning. Can I help you?” He turned to you.
“Yeah.” Dean pulled out his badge. “Uh, Billy Gibbons, Frank Beard, Kymberly Herrin. U.S. Marshals.”
The man furrowed his brows. “What’s this about?”
“We're looking for someone,” he answered.
“A young man, early twenties,” added Sam. “He'd have a— a thin scar right below his hairline.”
The man seemed surprised. “What’d he do?”
“Well, nothing. We're actually looking for someone else, but we think this young man could help us,” Sam replied. 
“Yeah, he's not in any kind of trouble or anything; well, not yet,” Dean chuckled. He looked down at the intricate tattoo on the man’s forearm. “I think maybe you know who he is… Master Sergeant.” He smiled. “My dad was in the Corps, he was a Corporal.”
“What company?” the man asked.
“Echo-2-1,” Dean replied, smiling proudly. 
Sam got back to business. “So, can you help us?”
The man hesitated before talking again. “Duane Tanner's got a scar like that. But I know him. Good kid, keeps his nose clean.”
Dean nodded. “Oh, I'm sure he does. Um. You know where he lives?”
“With his family, up Aspen Way.”
“Thank you.”
You bumped into a telephone pole as you and the brothers headed back to the car. You looked down at it, and something caught your eye. There was a single word etched into the pole: “CROATOAN.” You brushed your fingers over the etching. “Guys, look.”
“Croatoan?” Dean read.
“Yeah.”
Dean looked at you blankly.
Sam gave him a look. “Roanoke? Lost colony? Ring a bell? Dean, did you pay any attention in history class?”
“Yeah! Shots heard 'round the world, How bills become laws…” Dean trailed off.
“That's not school, that's Schoolhouse Rock,” Sam scoffed.
Dean rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”
“Anywho,” you cut back in. “Roanoke was one of the first English colonies— late 1500s-ish?”
“Oh yeah, yeah, I do remember that,” Dean said excitedly. “The only thing they left behind was a single word carved in a tree. Croatoan.”
“Yeah. There were theories,” you continued. “Native American raid, disease, famine, but nobody really knows what happened. They were all just… gone. Wiped out overnight.”
Dean cocked his head to the side. “You don't think that's what's going on here, I mean—”
Sam cut him off with a sigh. “Whatever I saw in my head, it sure wasn't good. But what do you think could do that?”
“Well, I mean, like I said, all of your weirdo visions are always tied to the Yellow-Eyed Demon somehow, so…” Dean trailed off.
“We should get help. Bobby, uh, Ellen maybe?” Sam suggested.
“Good idea,” you said. You pulled out your phone to call Bobby, only to discover you had no signal. “Great. No signal.”
The two brothers took their phones out as well. 
“Huh, me neither,” said Sam. 
“Nada,” Dean stated.
“Payphone, maybe?” you tried, leading the boys over to one. Unfortunately for you, all you heard was a beeping to signify no signal. “Line's dead.” You hung up the phone.
“I'll tell you one thing. If I was gonna massacre a town, that'd be my first step,” Dean noted, pointing at the payphone. 
***
You pulled up in front of a homely, slightly tacky cabin. Sam rapped his knuckles against the door, and almost immediately, a teenage boy opened it.
“Yeah?” he grinned.
Dean flashed his badge. “We're looking for Duane Tanner; he lives here, right?”
“Yeah, he's my brother,” the boy nodded.
“Can we talk to him?”
He sucked in air through his teeth. “Oh, he's not here right now.”
“Do you know where he is?” Dean pressed.
“Yeah, he went on a fishing trip up by Roslyn Lake.”
“Your parents home?” Sam questioned.
“Yeah, they're inside,” the boy nodded.
“Jake?” a voice called. ‘Oh, that’s his name.’ “Who is it?”
Dean spoke as the owner of the voice appeared. “Hi, U.S. Marshals, sir, we're looking for your son Duane.”
Mr. Tanner seemed confused. “Wh— Why? He's not in trouble, is he?”
“No, no, no, no. We just need to ask him a couple of routine questions, that's all.” Dean flashed a winning smile.
“When's he due back from his trip?” questioned Sam.
“I'm not sure.”
“Well, maybe your wife knows.”
The man’s eerie smile was far too cheerful for the current conversation. “No, I don't know, she's not here right now.”
You cocked your head to the side. “Your son said she was.”
Jake seemed caught. “Did I?”
This whole thing was weirding you the hell out.
“She's getting groceries,” Mr. Tanner smiled. “So, when Duane gets back, there's a number where he can get a hold of you?”
“Oh, no,” Dean said. “We'll just check in with you later.”
The three of you turned back down the steps, and you waited to talk until you heard the door close. “That was kind of creepy, right? Little too… Stepford?”
“Big time,” Dean replied.
You headed around the back of the house, ducking down to avoid being seen by the Tanners. You caught sight of a poor woman with mussed up blonde hair tied to a chair sweating and crying. You cocked your gun as Dean kicked in the door, and you quickly shot Mr. Tanner in the chest when he tried to charge you with a knife. You turned to Sam and Dean who were over by the window.
“He got away,” Dean grunted, referencing Jake who had leapt out of the window.
“Great,” you sighed. You turned your attention back to the woman in the chair and noticed a profusely bleeding wound. “Dean, start the car. Sam, get her to the backseat. I’m gonna patch her up as best I can til we can get to a doctor.”
The boys nodded and rushed to do your bidding. You rushed to the trunk of the Impala and pulled out your makeshift first aid kit— a collection of wraps, bandages, antiseptics, antibiotics, sutures, sewing needles, thread, and painkillers you gathered from random pharmacies and kept in a small, vintage tin box with roses etched into the lid and occasionally refilled. You hurriedly got in the backseat with the woman, and you kept her conscious by asking her questions about herself. You learned her name was Beverly, and that her two sons, Duane and Jake, went fishing and hunting together all the time. Her first sign that something was wrong was that Jake didn’t go with his brother on the trip. After her hiccups mourning the death of her husband— for which you profusely apologized to her— and hissing in pain as you kept pressure on her wound, you finally arrived at a small clinic on the main stretch of road. 
You held the pressure on her shoulder as you led her into the clinic, yelling, “Doctor! We need a doctor!”
A young woman in a pleasant floral jacket and cute pink headband came rushing out, concerned. “Mrs. Tanner, what happened?” she asked the woman on your shoulder.
“She’s been attacked,” you explained, hurrying past her.
“Dr. Lee!” the young woman called.
The doctor instructed you to head down the hallway into an examination room. You gently placed her down on the bed, and Beverly moaned as you shifted position around her to continue holding her shoulder. The doctor came into the room moments later followed by Sam and Dean, who stood at the doorway. You filled the doctor in on the medical history you’d gathered from Mrs. Tanner on the way to the clinic, and the doctor immediately set to work stitching the wound. You tossed the tattered and bloodstained jacket Mrs. Tanner had been wearing into the garbage and washed your hands up to your elbows. 
Beverly began to explain what happened to the doctor, who seemed shocked. “Wait, you said Jake helped him? Your son Jake?” the doctor asked.
Beverly nodded. “They beat me. Tied me up.”
“I don't believe it,” the young nurse breathed out. 
“Beverly… do you have any idea why they would act this way? Any history of chemical dependency?” Dr. Lee questioned.
“No, of course not. I don't know why. One minute they were my husband and my son. And the next, they had the devil in them.” Beverly shook as she spoke.
You walked out into the hallway with Sam and Dean.
“Those guys were whacked out of their gourds,” Dean commented.
“Ya think?” you snorted. “And what I don’t understand is, if they already beat and subdued her, why put that giant gash on her shoulder? That wound was fresh; like it happened this morning. Everything else seemed a few days old, at least.”
“Yeah, this whole thing is weird, man,” Sam added. “What do you guys think? Multiple demons, mass possession?”
“If it is a possession there could be more. I mean, God knows how many, it could be like a friggin' Shriner convention,” Dean grumbled. “Of course, that's one way to wipe out a town, you take it from the inside.”
“I don't know, man. We didn't see any of the demon smoke with Mr. Tanner, or any of the other usual signs,” Sam reminded his brother.
“Well, whatever. Something turned him into a monster. And you know if you woulda taken out the other one, there'd be one less to worry about,” the older brother chided.
Sam huffed, “I'm sorry, alright? I hesitated, Dean, it was a kid!”
“Boys, relax!” you scolded, standing between them.
Dean looked over your head at Sam. “No, it was an ‘it’. Not the best time for a bleeding heart, Sam.”
“Dean,” you murmured harshly. 
Dr. Lee stalked out of the lab, heels clicking loudly on the floor to let the brothers know it was time to stop arguing. 
“How is she?” you asked her.
“Terrible! What the hell happened out there?” she questioned.
“We don't know,” Dean shook his head.
“Yeah? Well, you just killed my next door neighbor.” Dr. Lee crossed her arms over her chest.
“I didn’t have a choice,” you told her. “All of us would’ve been dead if I hadn’t.”
“Maybe so, but we need the county Sheriff. I need the coroner —”
Sam cut her off. “Phones are down.”
“I know, I tried. Tell me you have a police radio in the car?” Dr. Lee pleaded.
“Yeah, we do. But it crapped out just like everything else,” Sam said.
The blonde ran a hand through her hair and began to pace. “I don't understand what is happening.”
“How far is it to the next town?” you asked her.
“It's about forty miles down to Sidewinder.”
“Alright, I'm gonna go down there, see if I can find some help. You’re coming with me.” He looked down at you before clapping Sam on the shoulder. “My partner 'll stick around, keep you guys safe.”
“Safe from what?” Dr. Lee questioned pointedly.
“We'll get back to you on that,” Dean responded. He then led you away from Sam and Dr. Lee and out to the Impala.
“What’d you do with Mr. Tanner?” you asked him.
“He’s in the lab somewhere. Man’s heavier than he looks,” he joked as he began to drive off.
“Dean, I killed him,” you mourned. “He was just a guy. Now, his two sons don’t have a father. He was a person.”
“(Y/N), since when are you all morally gray?” Dean questioned gently. His usual bite behind his sarcasm was missing. “I get it, but he wasn’t ‘just a guy’ anymore.”
“I know that,” you said. “That’s what I’m starting to get worried about. Normally, I wouldn’t think twice. Vamps used to be people. Hell, one of my first vamp kills was my parents. I don’t know what’s happening to me, man. I don’t hesitate— hell no— but… I don’t know.”
“Hey, I get it.” He reached across the seat and grabbed your hand. “I’m a straight shooter, too. I’m in the same place you are.”
You scooched across the bench seat and kept your hand entwined with Deans, playing with his fingers. You leaned your head on his shoulder, and he pulled your hand up to his lips and kissed it, eyes never leaving the road. 
“Things keep getting weirder, dude. Since when do we second-guess?” You tried to muster a laugh, but your heart wasn’t in it.
“I know. This whole thing is spinnin’ out of our control. I hate it,” he admitted. 
“Yeah, me, too,” you murmured. “I wish we could’ve met under normal circumstances.”
He chuckled. “Hm. Me, too.”
The rest of the drive was spent hand in hand and silent. You continued to play with Dean’s fingers and kept your head on his shoulder. Only when you saw two cars blocking the road and men standing with their large guns drawn did you pull your head up. Dean’s grip on your hand tightened— whether to reassure you or himself, you weren’t sure— as he rolled to a stop. You noticed one of the men in front of you was the teenager from the Tanner house, Jake. He stopped the car, frowning. Something banged on the roof of the car, making both you and Dean jump. His hand never left yours, and he shifted his body toward the man leaning down into the window almost protectively in front of you. “Oh-ho-ho. Hey,” Dean awkwardly laughed.
“Sorry. Road's closed,” the man at the driver’s side window grinned.
“Yeah, I can see that. What's up?” Dean questioned.
“Quarantine,” was his simple reply.
“Quarantine? Why?” you asked. Dean stiffened and tried to hide you more with his body when you spoke.
“Don't know,” the man tsked. “Something going around out there.”
“Uh-huh. Who told you that?” Dean asked, sass lying just below the surface of his tone.
The man’s face was blank when he responded. “County Sheriff.”
“Is he here?”
“No. He called. Say, why don't you get out of the car and we'll talk a little?”
Dean laughed nervously. “Well, you are a handsome devil, but I don't swing that way, sorry.”
“I'd sure appreciate it if you got out of the car, just for a quick minute.” The man’s stoicism was beginning to drop, and the anger bubbling just below the surface was becoming visible.
“Yeah, I'll bet you would.” Dean released your hand to quickly throw the car in reverse. The man grabbed his collar and held on for dear life as you tried your best to pry his fingers off. Thankfully, Dean swung the car around, finally cutting the man loose, and sped away. The sound of guns firing at the car filled your ears, but none of the bullets seemed to be hitting their desired target.
“You okay?” Dean asked you, throwing you a worried look.
“Yeah,” you heaved. “You?”
“Peachy,” he grunted.
Suddenly, the ex-military man you first met in town stepped in the path of the Impala, brandishing a rifle.
Dean slammed on his brakes, and you put your hands on the dashboard to steady yourself.
“Hands where I can see 'em!” the man yelled.
“Son of a—” Dean grumbled, holding his hands up. You did the same.
“Get out of the car! Out of the car!” he commanded.
You slowly slid across the seat to the passenger’s side door as Dean started climbing out. You took the opportunity of your hands being hidden behind the door to quickly whip out your handgun.
“Drop the gun!” you ordered.
“Put it down, now!” the man yelled back at you. “Are y’all part of 'em?!” 
“No!” Dean answered. “Are you?”
“No!”
“You could be lying!” Dean protested.
“So could you!”
“Alright! Alright,” you broke in. “We could do this all day, alright? Let's just, uh, let's take it easy before we kill each other.”
The sergeant relaxed slightly. “What's going on with everybody?”
“I don't know,” you admitted.
“My neighbor— Mr. Rogers, he—”
Dean interrupted the man. “You've got a neighbor named Mr. Rogers?”
“Not anymore,” the man responded gruffly. “He came at me with a hatchet. I put him down. He's not the only one, I mean, it's happening to everyone.”
“We’re heading over to the Doc's place, there's still some people left,” Dean explained.
“No, no way. I'm getting the hell out,” the older man stated.
“There's no way out, they got the bridge covered, now come on,” the older Winchester said.
“I don't believe you,” the man replied.
“Fine, stay here, be my guest.” It was then you noticed Dean was pointing a handgun at the man, too, who hesitated before walking over to the backseat of the Impala. He swapped his rifle for a handgun as he stooped down into the backseat, and you kept your gun trained on him over the back of your seat. The older man kept his gun aimed at you, but his eyes would frantically flick to Dean every now and again.
Dean looked between you and the man and put his gun away to be able to drive back to the clinic. “Well, this ought to be a relaxing drive.”
You pinned the sergeant to his spot in the backseat with a hard glare and your gun on him. He returned your glare and pointed gun the whole way to the clinic. Despite your aching arms, you refused to falter. “What’s your name?” you asked him, still on your guard.
“Mark.”
“Mark. Nice to meet you, Mark,” you smiled despite your situation.
Dean slowed to a stop in front of the clinic, and you and Mark mutually agreed to relax your guns. 
“Sammy? Open up!” Dean banged on the door to the clinic. 
Sam appeared at the glass a few moments later and allowed you inside. You kept your gun cocked and in your hand but pointed at the floor. 
“Did you guys, uh, get to a phone?” Sam questioned, looking between the three guns you were all brandishing.
“Road block.” Dean turned to Mark. “I'm gonna have a word. Doc's inside.”
Mark looked between the three of you, hesitating, before heading inside.
“What's going on out there, guys?” Sam asked.
“Man, I don't know, I feel like Chuck Heston in the Omega Man. I mean, Sarge is the only sane person I could find. What are we dealing with, do you know?” Dean questioned.
“Yeah. Doc thinks it's a virus.”
Dean snorted. “Okay, great. What do you think?”
“I think she's right.”
“Really?” Your eyebrows shot up in surprise.
“Really,” Sam answered. “And I think the infected are trying to infect others with blood-to-blood contact. Oh, but it gets better. The, uh, the virus? Leaves traces of sulfur in the blood.”
“Cool. Demonic virus,” you deadpanned.
“Yeah, more like demonic germ warfare,” Sam added.  “At least it explains why I've been having visions.”
“It's like a Biblical plague,” noted Dean.
“Yeah. You don't know how right you are, Dean. I've been poring through Dad's journal, found something about the Roanoke colony,” Sam began. “Dad always had a theory about Croatoan. He thought it was a demon's name. Sometimes known as Deva or sometimes Resheph. A demon of plague and pestilence.”
Dean laughed humorlessly. “Well, that— that's terrific. Why here, why now?”
“I have no idea. But Dean, who knows how far this thing can spread? We gotta get out of here, we gotta warn people—”
Before any of you could speak, Mark called from the back of the clinic, “They've got one! In here!”
Dean entered the room behind Sam. “What do you mean?” he asked Mark.
“The wife. She's infected,” Sam explained.
“We've gotta take care of this. We can't just leave her in there. My neighbors, they were strong. The longer we wait, the stronger she'll get,” Mark urged.
You hesitated, but only for a moment, before brushing past Sam and Dean into the lab with your gun drawn. 
“Whoa!” the sweet nurse from earlier exclaimed. “You're gonna kill Beverly Tanner?”
“Doctor, could there be any treatment? Some kind of cure for this?” Sam pleaded.
“Can you cure it?” You turned toward Dr. Lee.
“For God's sake, I don't even know what ‘it’ is!” she cried.
“I told you, it's just a matter of time before she breaks through,” Mark told you.
“Just leave her in there, you can't shoot her like an animal!” the young nurse said.
You slowly walked over to the door of the utility room Beverly was being held in. You, Dean, and Mark held your guns steady on the door. Sam carefully opened it to reveal Beverly huddled on the floor in a corner, crying into her knees. She jumped as you approached. “Mark, what are you doing? Mark, it's, it's them!” She pointed at you, Dean, and Sam, who stood over your shoulder. “They locked me in here, they— they tried to kill me! They're infected, not me! Please, Mark! You've known me all your life! Please!”
“You sure she's one of 'em?” Dean asked, looking at his brother. 
Sam nodded. Mark pulled back, looking distraught, and you took the opportunity to step forward. 
In an attempt to hear as few of her cries for mercy as possible, you quickly fired one shot square between her eyes. Guilt immediately clawed at your throat, and you thought you could throw up. You stowed your gun and crouched beside her crumpled form. You moved her into a less disturbing configuration, laying her on her back with her arms crossed over her chest. You closed her paralyzed, open eyes and brushed through her hair with your fingers. With the back of your hand, you wiped your own eyes and stood, leaving the room and shutting the door behind you. 
Choked up, you pushed past a concerned Sam and Dean and headed out to the car. You grabbed your duffel bag to have some reason for going outside from the trunk when you heard a sound from down the street: a car approaching. Your breath caught, and you ducked behind the wall of the clinic’s entrance; back pressed to it. You peeked out briefly to see Jake was the one driving the car with the man who had tried to kill you and Dean earlier. Soundlessly, you slipped back inside the building and turned the lights at the entrance off. 
You locked both the door to the entrance and the door to the waiting room behind you, hurriedly pulling down the shades and turning off as many unnecessary lights as possible. You turned the light off in the waiting room and stormed into the lab where everyone was huddled together. You pulled down the shades behind Dr. Lee wordlessly.
“(Y/N/N)?” Sam asked gently. “What’s wrong?”
“They’re here. Everybody, get yourself a weapon from my bag if you know how to use one. Don’t grab one, get injured, and then get infected, got it?” you ordered.
Sam nodded and grabbed your bag from you. He threw you your bowie knife and pulled a hunting knife from the duffel for himself. 
The young nurse, who you learned was named Pam, dropped a vial of blood, and she screamed. “Oh god! Is there any on me? Am I okay?”
Dr. Lee tried to calm her down. “You're clean, you're okay.”
“Why are we staying here? Please, let's just go!” Pam cried.
“No, we can't because those things are everywhere,” Dean stated firmly.
Pam began to sink to the floor. “Oh god!—”
“Hey, shh, shh,” Dr. Lee told her.
Sam turned to you and Dean who stood together by the lab’s entrance. “She's right about one thing,” he said just loud enough for the two of you to hear. “We can't stay here. We've gotta get out of here, get to the Roadhouse? Somewhere. Let people know what's coming.”
“Yeah, good point,” Dean nodded. “Night of the Living Dead didn't exactly end pretty.”
“Well, I'm not sure we've got a choice,” Mark cut in. “Lots of folks up here are good with rifles— even with all your hardware we're- we're easy targets. So unless you've got some explosives…” he trailed off.
You looked up at the shelf of medical supplies and turned to Sam. “You thinkin’ what I’m thinkin’?”
“Yeah, actually.” He grabbed a bottle of potassium chloride and waved it at you.
“I’m lost, what’s happening here?” Dean questioned. “Speak, nerds.”
You deadpanned at him. “Potassium chlorate bombs. I’ve gotta figure out a way to ionize the chloride and get some oxygen in it; otherwise, this’ll never—”
Your explanation was cut off by a loud banging on the door.
“Hey! Let me in, let me in! Please!” the voice called as you approached the door.
“It's Duane Tanner!” Mark announced. He opened the door to let him in, and you grabbed your gun in your jacket immediately.
“Thank god,” Duane breathed out, walking into the clinic. 
Mark locked the door behind him. “Duane, you okay?”
Dean quietly asked Sam, “That's the guy that I, uh—” he clicked his tongue.
Sam nodded, seeming shaken.
“Who else is in here?” Duane went to step into the lab, but Dean grabbed his arm.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, easy there, chief,” he said. “Hey Doc! Give Duane a good once-over, would you?”
Dr. Lee led your group into the lab. “Pam?”
Pam seemed to understand what that meant and moved to gather medical supplies.
“Who are you?” Duane asked Dean.
“Never mind who I am. Doc.”
Dr. Lee nodded nervously. “Yeah, okay.”
“Duane. Where you been?” Mark asked softly.
“On a fishing trip up by Roslyn. I came back this afternoon. I— I saw Roger McGill being dragged out of his house by people we know! They started cutting him with knives! I ran, I've been hiding in the woods ever since. Has anybody seen my mom and dad?”
Your heart squeezed in your chest and bile rose in your throat.
“Sweetheart, it’s okay,” Dean whispered to you. 
You could barely hear him over your heart pounding against your ribcage. You then noticed a deep gash in Duane’s left leg. “He’s bleeding.”
“Where'd you get that?” Dean interrogated.
“I was running, I must have tripped.” Duane’s cool tone was making it difficult to read whether he was infected or genuinely had no idea what was going on.
“Tie him up, there's rope in there,” the older brother ordered. You complied and dug the rope out of the supply closet.
“Wait—” Duane said, attempting to stand.
“Sit down!” Dean commanded, pointing his gun at Duane.
“I'm sorry, Duane, he's right,” Mark agreed. “We've gotta be careful.”
“Careful? About what?”
“Did they bleed on you?” Dean questioned, not answering the young man’s question.
“No, what the hell? No!” Duane frantically answered.
“Doc? Any way to know for sure, any test?” Sam questioned. You could tell he was trying to deescalate the situation before his vision came true. 
Dr. Lee sighed. “I've studied Beverly's bloodwork backwards and forwards.”
“My mom!” Duane cried.
Dr. Lee continued. “It took three hours for the virus to incubate. The sulfur didn't appear in the blood until then, so… no, there'd be no way of knowing. Not until after Duane turns.”
Sam looked over to his brother. “Dean, I gotta talk to you. Now.”
Dean looked over to you, and you nodded, standing up from where you’d tied Duane to the chair he was sitting in. You drew your gun and trained it on him while the brothers stepped out into the hall.
Dean reappeared a minute or so later.
“Where’s Sam?” you asked him.
He didn’t answer you. He simply cocked his gun and looked past you at Duane. Pam and Dr. Lee startled to their feet, chests heaving as they looked between Dean and Duane.
“No, you're not gonna—” Duane heaved. “No, no, I swear it's not in me!”
“Oh God. We're all gonna die,” Pam cried.
“Maybe he's telling the truth,” Mark tried.
“No, he's not him, not anymore.”
“Stop it! Ask her, ask the doctor! It's not in me!” Duane pleaded.
Dr. Lee shook her head and hesitantly looked at Dean. “I… I can’t tell.”
Duane began to sob. “Please, don't. Don't, please. I swear, it's not in me, it's not in me, I swear, I— I swear it's not in me. No, don't.”
Dean seemed to get choked up, too. “I got no choice.” 
You stared at him, eyes almost pleading him not to pull the trigger. However, you would also respect his choice if he did; you knew the risks. Dean trembled, hesitating, and finally lowered the gun. “Dammit,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. 
He left the room, and you followed. Dean let Sam out of the room he’d apparently locked his younger brother in wordlessly and kept stalking down the hall. Sam simply looked after him for a moment before turning back to the lab, but you followed Dean further.
He turned into a dark exam room at the end of the hall. You did so as well, making sure the curtains were drawn as tightly as possible before you flicked on the desk lamp. Dean sat in a chair while you sat in another, facing him. Neither of you said a word for a moment. 
“What made you stop?” you asked him.
He hesitated before answering. “Sam,” he replied simply. “And you.”
Your breath caught at his admission. “Me?” you asked, just loud enough for him to hear. 
He nodded, unable to meet your gaze. 
“Why?” you asked softly.
“Couldn’t let you watch me do that,” he muttered. “And… I want you to see me how I see you.”
“What do you mean?” you asked.
“I mean— You just— You remind me that there’s good out there. In all this crap. You make me wanna be better,” he admitted, gaze still pointed to the floor. 
You reached over and tilted his chin to face you with your index finger, forcing him to look at you. “Dean—”
He cut you off by surging forward to crush his lips to yours. You sighed into the kiss, winding your hands around his neck and threading your fingers through his hair. He cupped your chin with one hand and grabbed your waist with the other. You kissed once, then again, then one final time before simply resting your foreheads against each other’s. You nudged his nose with yours, eyes still closed, and he stroked circles on your hip with his thumb. 
The two of you were broken apart by the sound of a scream and two shots being fired off. You barely shared a look before sprinting toward the sound with your guns drawn.
“It’s Sam,” Mark told you. “He’s infected.”
Your jaw went slack at the sight of Sam on the floor with an open wound on his chest and Pam lying dead on the floor beside him.
“Oh, god,” you breathed out, turning to see Dean completely shocked and terrified.
*** Your group had Sam tied to a chair with a bandage over his wound. Dean was angry, and Sam seemed defeated. Your heart broke for both brothers and for the fact that you were gonna lose an amazing friend soon. 
“Nobody is shooting my brother,” Dean stated firmly.
Duane argued, “He isn't gonna be your brother much longer. You said it yourself.”
“Nobody is shooting anyone!” you shouted. 
“He was gonna shoot me!” Duane gestured toward Dean.
“You don't shut your pie-hole, I still might!” Dean grunted.
Sam’s sad voice caught everyone’s attention. “Dean, they're right. I'm infected; just give me the gun and I'll do it myself.”
“Fuck that,” Dean scoffed.
“Dean, I'm not gonna become one of those things,” Sam pleaded.
“Sam, we've still got some time—”
Mark cut Dean off. “Time for what? Look, I understand he's your brother, and I'm sorry, I am. But we gotta take care of this.” He pulled out his gun.
“I'm gonna say this one time— you make a move on him, you'll be dead before you hit the ground. You understand me? Do I make myself clear?!” Dean growled.
Mark’s face was set in hard lines. “Then what are we supposed to do?!”
Dean tossed Mark his kets. “Get the hell out of here, that's what. Take my car. You've got the explosives, there's an arsenal in there. You two go with him. You've got enough firepower to handle anything now. (Y/N), you go with them.”
“Dean, no!” you said. “I’m not leaving you!”
“Sweetheart, you have to—”
“No!”
“Guys, no. No. Go with them. This is your only chance!” Sam cried.
Dean turned to his younger brother. “You're not gonna get rid of me that easy.”
Mark chimed back in. “No, he's right. Come with us.”
Dean just stared at him.
“Okay, it's your funeral.” He led Duane and Dr. Lee out the door.
“Thank you, for everything,” Dr. Lee told you as she left.
“Don’t mention it,” you said halfheartedly.
She shut the door behind you, and Sam began to cry.
You were repeatedly surprised by Dean’s sense of play and slight immaturity at the grimmest of moments. “Wish we had a deck of cards, or a foosball table or something.”
“Don’t do this,” Sam pleaded. “Just get the hell out of here.”
“He’s right, (Y/N), you should leave,” Dean tired.
You crossed your arms and spoke with authority despite your soft tone. “Dean, we’ve discussed this already. I’m not going anywhere without you.”
“Give me my gun and leave,” Sam begged.
“For the last time, Sam. No,” Dean stated.
Sam slammed his fists against his chair. “This is the dumbest thing you've ever done.”
“Oh, I don't know about that. Remember that waitress in Tampa?” Dean shuddered.
“Dean, I'm sick. It's over for me. It doesn't have to be for you two,” Sam sobbed. “You can keep going.”
“Who says I want to?” Dean admitted.
“What?” you and Sam breathed out.
Dean pulled his handgun out of his waistband and put it on the file cabinet behind him. “I'm tired, Sam. I'm tired of this job, this life… this weight on my shoulders, man. I'm tired of it.”
Sam scoffed. “So, what, so you're just going to give up? You're just gonna lay down and die? Look, Dean, I know this stuff with Dad has—” 
“You're wrong. It's not about Dad. I mean, part of it is, sure, but…” he trailed off.
“What is it about?” Sam questioned.
A knock at the door broke the tense silence settled over the room. “You'd better come see this,” Dr. Lee called through the door.
You quickly untied Sam and brought him out to where Dr. Lee, Dean, Mark, and Duane were already gathered. 
“There's no one. Not anywhere. They've all just… vanished,” Dr. Lee explained.
“Croatoan,” you realized, looking over at the telephone pole opposite you.
***
Miraculously, the virus didn’t incubate in Sam’s blood. Strangely, when Dr. Lee looked back at the Tanner samples, the sulfur was gone, too. Confused and slightly uneasy, you and the brothers packed up the Impala. 
“Hey, the Sarge and I are getting the hell out of here, heading south. You should come,” Duane suggested to Dr. Lee.
“I'd better get over to Sidewinder, get the authorities up here. If they'll believe me. Take care,” she told them.
Mark waved to the three of you as well as Dr. Lee. 
“What about him?” Dean pointed to his brother.
“He's going to be fine. No signs of infection,” she grinned.
You turned to Sam.
“Hey, don't look at me. I got no clue,” he said.
“I swear, I'm gonna lose sleep over this one. I mean, why here, why now? And where the hell did everybody go? It's like they just fuckin’ melted,” Dean griped.
“Why was I immune?” Sam wondered aloud.
“Yeah. You know what? That's a good question. You know, I'm already starting to feel like this is the one that got away.” Dean walked around to the driver’s side of the car and pulled away from the town. His words hung ominously over the car for the remainder of your drive.
Series Rewrite Taglist: @polireader @brightlilith @atcamillanorrman @jrizzelle @insomnia-bookworm @procrastination20 @mrs-liebgott @djs8891 @tiggytaylor @staple-your-mouth @jesstherebel @rach5ive @strawberrykiwisdogog @bruhidkjustwannaread @mxltifxnd0m @sunshine-on-marz @big-ol-boat @mgchaser @capncrankle @chervbs @simpingdeadcharacters @nesnejwritings @stillhere197 @tearsforhan @take-it-on-the-run @iloveyou2mia @maxinehufflepuffprincess @ohgeehowdigethere @seninjakitey @berarenado @s0urw00lf @princessleahorgana @quarterhorse19 @isla-finke-blog @silverdoragon @karacaroldanvers @gayandfairycore @examishbookwyrm @star-yawnznn @real-sharena-h @fandomloverrr @metalmonki @onlyangel-444 @yu-winchester @benniwiththefanni @daisychaingirl @immagods @missmieux @yoongi-holland @littledebbieinabigworld
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baldursgate3tempobsessed · 1 year ago
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hello! i’m not sure if ur taking requests but maybe an astarion x bard! tav who is neutral good? ik in game he hates it when we’re nice, so i’m wondering how you think he’d handle a tav who is not only kind but also not really interested in sex
Oooh, I like this! Time to bring out the bitchy cat energy. Because he is a bitch. Lot of Act 1 in game references here btw. Sfw, but y'know, Astarion sad boy backstory is always looming. Also conveniently ignoring the canon fact that Astarion doesn't know how to swim because I can~~~
~
Astarion supposed he could have come across a worse rag-tag crew of undesirables to associate with. It was made clear, disturbingly quickly, that he wouldn't have made it out here on his own. Not with the goblins and cultists lurking around every corner. And a damn vampire hunter for gods' sake.
Astarion could have done much worse than this merry-band of weirdos. Like laying dead in a ditch for instance. That said, it didn't change the fact that he was quickly growing tired of their leader's antics.
You were just so annoying. So selfless, in one of the stupidest ways he had ever seen. For one thing, why one earth would you ever trust a gith or Shar priestess? Or a vampire spawn for that matter. How no one had stabbed you in the back yet was beyond him, considering how you gave them every opportunity to do so.
Not that Astarion would, or at least not yet. But he could. Easily, considering all the misguided trust you had put in him.
But despite your flaws, he had to admit that you were capable, that much was clear. You were strong, quick, witty, and not above deception to keep the peace. He.... liked that about you, in a way. The extent to how far you would go to save others. It was courageous, as well as incredibly stupid, but he could respect it.
Slightly.
it helped that you were a cute little thing, even with the aggravating sunshine personality. Cute enough for Astarion to start thinking of... certain options. You would be easy to manipulate, he was sure of that. Enough so where his life could become one of your top priorities. You already seemed to like him, without him turning on the charm. It would be so easy to get you wrapped around his finger, with nothing but a few shiny words and some pleasant bed-warming. Nothing that he hadn't done before. And if anything, your absurd levels of kindness could.... make everything a little more pleasant than what he was used to. Gods willing.
And tonight seemed as good a time as any, considering everyone was still on a high from being the tiefling's heroes. You were excitedly talking at him, adorable in a frankly infuriating way. Or maybe the wine was working on him more than he had anticipated, he wasn't quite sure. But... your smile seemed extra enchanting tonight.
Enough so for him to get to the point after you asked how he was feeling, "I'm just looking for a little more excitement. A little more fun."
You cocked your head at him, innocently confused as he continued, "You know, we could always make our own entertainment darling. Get a little closer, so to speak."
"Sure!" You said, jumping on the opportunity faster than even Astarion had expected, "Can we do it now?"
Astarion blinked, pleased if not a bit surprised. He's not wholly against giving the camp a show, though the children still lurking about definitely put a damper on things. But maybe if you went far enough away...
"And can I choose what we do?" You asked, a wide smile on your face.
Astarion laughed, delighted at just how easy this was going to be, "Depends on how adventurous you're planning on being."
He hadn't expected you to grab his hand, easily intertwining your fingers with a smile, "I can show you."
Astarion hadn't been prepared for the quick escalation of events, but he was happy to abide by it. He nodded his head, giving your hand a small squeeze before saying, "Then lead the way."
And lead the way you did, right to the Waypoint of the swamp. Not exactly the most romantic place to be having sex, but Astarion had done worse. That was until you conjured the dancing lights, the dreary darkness suddenly transforming what should have been a putrid bog into a dreamy landscape, filled with flowers and freshwater.
Astarion looked to you, eyes wide, "How...?"
"We purified it!" You announced with a massive grin, "We did it this morning, before the party. Halsin and the other druids came down, I amped up their magic with a fantastic song, and bam! No more stench of the hag. Isn't it pretty?"
That... sounded exactly like something you would do, sweet thing that you were. Astarion nodded as he looked around, a little touched that you brought him here at all.
But as nice as the gesture was, he wasn't here for strictly fun. He had a plan, one that you were doing a wonderful job of putting into motion. Considering how you were in the middle of pulling your shirt over your head.
You looked at him expectantly, laughing a little when he rushed to join you. But before he could get his underclothes off, you were stepping away from him and... jumping into the water?
Astarion stared as you sputtered up to the surface, wiping your face with a loud laugh, "My gods, it's cold!"
"What on earth are you doing?" He called out to you, cautiously walking towards the water, "Are you trying to freeze to death?"
"Oh, hush!" You said, waving your hand in the air with a splash, "If we can kill an entire goblin camp than we can handle some cold water. Now get in already!"
Had he mentioned that you were aggravating yet?
But he hadn't made it this far to back out now. Besides, this was far from being on the list of the worst seduction tactics that he had to endure. Though it may have been the oddest one. Astarion couldn't remember a single time that jumping into a purified water pool led to lovemaking. But there was a first for everything. Though it didn't help that the water was indeed freezing.
"For fuck's sake," Astarion cursed when he came up for air, "This is your definition of fun?"
You giggled as you swam towards him, stopping to wrap your arms around his neck with a smile. Another unexpected move from you, a factor that he hadn't expected, but found oddly endearing.
You were playing with a lock of his wet hair, twisting it between your fingers as he wrapped his arms around you, "Well the fun part hasn't started yet."
Astarion laughed softly, his eyes zeroing in on your lips, "Is it about to start now?"
"I think it is," You whispered back, "You ready for it?"
"More than you know," Astarion murmured, leaning in to finally connect your mouth.
But before he could press his lips against yours you were dodging him, giggling as you whispered in his ear, "Good. Let's race."
And then you were pulling away from him entirely, diving under the water just to show back up a few feet away, a manic grin on your face, "Whoever gets to the opposite bank first wins!"
And then you were off, swimming away. You little cheater. Astarion didn't even think as he want after you, a childish competitiveness taking over. You still won, of course you did with that large of a head start, but he managed to beat you on the second and third try.
By his fourth win you were officially pouting, which only devolved into a splashing fight from there. One that he gracefully let you win.
It was all so stupid. Completely juvenile and beneath him. But then why was he having so much fun?
Eventually, you both got out of the water, opting to sit on the bank as you talked. Just... talking. Nothing more, and about the silliest things:
"If Halsin can turn into a bear, do you think I could learn how to grow an extra finger or two? It would make the lute playing so much easier."
"If you don't mind looking like a freak than sure. Are you thinking of literally growing them or having them attached?"
"If, and just hypothetically, Lae'zel and Shadowheart fought to the death, who would win?"
"Darling in all honesty, I think it would just devolve into lesbian sex."
"If you could go anywhere in the world, right now, where would it be?"
"...I think it would be here."
It was a startlingly fun conversation, one that had Astarion being sincere in ways that made him uncomfortable. But that didn't stop him from participating. The two of you talked about anything and everything until the sky started to lighten, both of you leaning into each other as you watched the sunrise.
That was something Astarion would never tire of, how beautiful the light and sky looked at the start of the day. Part of him still couldn't believe that he was able to see it at all, after two centuries of darkness. But now here he was, sitting on a peaceful riverbank after talking the night away, almost like... like he was a person. A real person who mattered. With someone who somehow thought the same.
You sighed, your head resting on Astarion's shoulder as you watched the pink sky, "We should head back soon. Before anyone starts to worry."
Astarion nodded, his heart clenching the slightest bit when you pulled away to stand. He... didn't want this to end. Not yet. Not when he-actually now that he thought about it, he hadn't done anything in the past eight hours that he had planned. The two of you hadn't even kissed, despite the fact that you had spent the vast majority of the night wet and in your undergarments.
How in the hells did that happen?
Astarion was still trying to figure that out as you tossed his shirt and pants his way. He stood, hastily putting it on while he struggled to figure out what to say next. He was completely off his usual script, at a complete loss as you re-opened the magical waypoint.
You turned back to look at him, that same sweet smile on your face that you had been wearing the whole night, "You ready to go?"
Astarion wasn't the type to stutter, but that's where he found himself when he blurted out, "I- wait- I mean, is that it?"
You cocked your head at him with a tiny frown, one that Astarion wanted off of your face immediately, "Did you not have fun?"
"I didn't say that, but it wasn't exactly the fun that I was referring to," Astarion said as he closed the distance between you, regaining a fraction of his usual forced confidence. Why were you so good at making him feel off-kilter?
He took your hand in his, reverting back to the seduction tactics he knew as he used his other hand to tilt your chin up, "I was thinking something a little more... intimate."
"I know what you meant," You said with a little laugh, giving his hand a small squeeze, "But my way seemed just as enjoyable, don't you think?"
"Darling, that's not exactly the point I was trying to make."
"Oh, I'm aware, but it was mine," You said easily, standing on your tip toes to kiss him on the cheek, "Thank you Astarion. It was fun, and I hope we can spend more time together like that in the future."
And just like that you were pulling away again, letting go off his hand to step into the portal, the feeling of your lips against his skin still lingering as you disappeared. Despite himself, Astarion brought his fingers up to where you kissed him, standing there like an imbecile as new feelings started to course through him. Emotions that he had no names for.
Maybe... this was going to be a lot harder than he thought it would.
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genshingorlsrevengeance · 5 months ago
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Hello! I have a small request, if you have time I was wondering if you can do Nel, Alear and Yunaka with a S/O who often spaces out and wanders off and next thing you know their like trapped in a hole or something with little to no idea how they got there?
It’s just a silly scenario my brain made up. I hope you have a great day/evening/night!
(FE: Engage) Nel, Alear, and Yunaka's S/O constantly getting stuck
This request was from December 1st of 2023, WHOOPS
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Nel simply sighs upon seeing S/O in another pitfall, her red eyes glancing down.
This was not something that should be a normal sight, yet here she was.
(S/O) "...H-Hi, Nel-"
(Nel) "S/O. We have spoken about this."
(S/O) "I-I know we have! Sorry, just...can you get me out of here first?"
Nel reaches down to grab their arm and yanks them out without any effort, watching as they stumbled.
(S/O) "Thanks...Um-"
(Nel) "Perhaps it would be better for you to stay near me on the Somniel?"
(S/O) "I don't want to add any unnecessary stress, Nel!"
Too late for that.
The next best thing would be for these holes to keep showing up. Then again, S/O might fall off the edge if they weren't caught in it.
...Now that she thought about it, who keeps digging these holes anyway?
(Nel) "It is fine, S/O. As long as I know that you are safe, it will not add any additional stress."
(S/O) "So I don't stress you out?"
(Nel) "I did not say that."
(S/O) "Ha...R-Right."
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Why can no one in this army ever be normal? Is the thought echoing through Alear's mind as she sees S/O on top of a tree.
(Alear) "S/O?"
(S/O) "...Oh, Alear! Do you need something?"
(Alear) "How on earth did you get up?"
(S/O) "...T-That's a good question, I'm not sure."
(Alear) "I'm starting to think your spacing out might get yourself hurt one day."
(S/O) "Don't worry, I haven't gotten hurt in a couple months whenever I do this!"
(Alear) "That...doesn't make me feel better, S/O."
She has Vander, Framme, and Clanne keep an eye on S/O, much to her embarassment.
But it'd give her some peace of mind knowing that the three of them were on the case making sure nothing serious would happen.
...Goddess, she hoped it did.
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Yunaka's eyes narrow as she realizes there's a abnormal shadow hanging above her.
Immediately spinning around with dagger in hand, she's about to throw it-
Before seeing S/O casually laying on top a rather high boulder, making her drop the dagger.
Effortlessly catching the hilt and sheathing it in her belt with a single motion, one hand goes to her chest in relief.
(Yunaka) "Holy CRAP you scared the heck outta me, S/O! How did you even?!-"
(S/O) "Yunaka? Is something wrong?"
(Yunaka) "Uh, yeah? You're just chilling up there like a total weirdo! How did you even climb that, it's completely smooth!"
(S/O) "...I don-"
(Yunaka) "-Don't know, right. Shoulda known the answer to that, hah..."
Everytime S/O does this, she swears her lifespan shortens.
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changbinsboobs · 2 months ago
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Changbin as husband is next I'm curious for his and hyunjinss
This is the longest fucking reading I've ever had so i just HAD to split it in 2 parts so bear with me. I love him but i hate him right now😩 (no i don't)
Husband Series: Changbin pt. 1
Ugh...that guy🫠 i bet you if i let him use up my whole deck he would. The amount of "ok last card" i had to say...and yet there was still so much gushing put...and ugh, i just can't stress enough how much into details he is and how much he wants to stress on them and make sure they don't go unnoticed or get misunderstood or overlooked. Reminds me so much of my audhd friend😭. Anyways back on track - tho i don't even know where to begin from, i really think he used up half my deck. I just counted 23 cards😳 i do indeed draw a lot for the others too but thats just next level. Not on topic but i think he's a really chatty drunk😂 now i wanna read on them when drunk🙌🏻😂
Ok soooo since i have so many cards ill try to combine them as much as i can and keep the messages as concise as possible so this post doesn't become a novel - the overall energy i noticed here is not so much emphasis on him as a husband but overall him as a partner in a committed relationship. Which leads me to believe he himself doesn't view marriage with such dread as the others did (there wasn't really any dread with felix bust still a certain anxiety around responsibilities, meanwhile that with changbin is absolutely nonexistent). I would say he seems himself as capable and even ready to take on that responsibility and role if the opportunity presents itself and i think he believes he'll do a good job. He's responsible, capable and can take care of it. I actually sense a feeling of pride in him about that.
Another MAJOR theme is him being a "simp" for his partner (he insists on wife). There are many cards that im trying to sum up:
He's very protective over her and doesn't let anyone say shit about her, he's giving me guard dog vibes. Also a big bodyguardy. I can see him when being out with her eyeing people and being on alert and just idk, looking scary as to scare of any weirdos before they even think about trying something. And to clear any misunderstandings up, im really not getting this coming from jealousy (not that its not there, it is😂, but its just 10% reason, out of 100), but rather because he wants the woman he loves to feel safe and protected around him. He wants her to be able to relax and trust that he will always have her back and keep her safe. He wants her pretty little witty head not to be bothered by ANYTHING!
More from the simpy train - looks up to her a lot and kinda puts her a bit on a pedestal. This is not a very debilitating energy but feels rather like something he has made peace with and accepts - which is that she is indeed better than him and he can never be able to reach her, which means he is incredibly lucky and appreciative of the fact a woman like that has chosen him and he tries whatever he can to live up to her standard and continue to give her reasons to stay with him and continue to love him. Although she can never love him as much as he does (thats his thought🥲). But as i said this doesn't feel victimy to me at all but rather just seems realistic to him and he's a big boy and can accept reality for what it is and choose to feel lucky instead of beating himself up for not being good enough and self sabotage. Im actually really shocked looking at his energy because i can really feel the strength of his mind and ughh just how innovative and flexible he is. His will is just astounding and making me really happy, despite him obviously having some issues he doesn't let himself be defined by it and chooses to spin them to him favor. What an amazing guy💗
Back to the reading - so he spends a lot of time in his head, doing A LOT of 2 things. One is being thinking of his girl and what he can do to make her happy, analyzing previous conversations to see if he missed something or if he has remembered everything. Contemplating if she maybe gave him a hint about something, or if she maybe looked hesitant with something. Maybe her body language was off? He notes that. If there was any difference in her behaviour today, if she looked different. He's really putting LOTS of energy thinking about her and analyzing her and her behaviour. Again this doesn't seem to come from distrust (although he thinks of that as well, its just not his motivator, he just considers everything, thats why) but rather for his own feeling of safety. I think he is a very thoughtful and analyzing and sensitive person in nature so this may be something he always does, except when its something very important to him, and a relationship at that - he does it even more intensely. He doesn't only think about and analyze her tho. He does that to him too, to their relationship as well. He just wants to have a good understanding and overview of everything that is happening in the relationship so he has a sense of control and safety. You can always fix something if you know its broken. Or beginning to bend. You can fix the problem before the branch brakes i think is what he wants to say. And he wants things to run as smoothly as possible with them, and once again he has taken on the responsibility to make his girls life as easy and carefree as possible and how can that happen if he leaves the whole relationship in her hands?! He can't, so he doesn't his part very diligently and tries to keep up on the same level as her, emotional-intelligence-wise.
He also doesn't to just thinking but planing & organizing. So i think he takes lots of care for other stuff too like planing and booking fun dates. If he cant attend then books fun stuff for her. Provide her with the needed tools/means for her to be able to create, to indulge in her hobbies. He really loves that feminine creator energy and really wants to do his best to encourage and provide an encouraging environment for his wife to get in her feminine creator energy and bring him joy with it. Also thats really random but he's always ready and loves giving her massages😂💗(after her long day of crafting). He just loves hearing about it, seeing the excitement in her voice and face. It charges him.
He also spends lots of time fantasizing about her. Reminiscing wonderful dates, imagining potential future ones, creating scenarios etc. He's just A LOT in his head, his mind is really really active, and its very occupied with his love. Also another random message, commitment and love are tied with him somehow. Im seeing he cant commit if he doesn't love but he also cant love if he can't commit. So i would say he's very extreme-y. Like he's either all in or all out. No middle ground. What i mean is he HAS to be this intense in a relationship because for him thats commitment, THATS expressing love. And if he's not able to do that, then his love and interest and enthusiasm begin to fade away. He HAS to be able to be like that in a relationship and i think often he has been labeled (or was) just WAYYY TOO MUCH for the girls he has been in a relationship with. Im seeing he can get very overwhelming and overbearing if the person he's with just isn't the person to enjoy that kind of commitment and effort. But to go back to the cards, he also fantasizes about physical stuff too, for example he's riding in the car, and for the whole ride he's imagining and giggling and wiggling his feet and twirling his hairs because he plays over and over how that one time while they were still just dating she looked him in the eyes with that wet sexy look, and how his whole body got shivers and his stomach dropped and his heart skipped and his palms got sweaty and he swears some saliva started dripping out the corner of his mouth and his knees got weak and he almost felt like he was gonna black out and by the time he came back to his senses she was already sooo close to his lips and them BAM. Fireworks everywhere. He can never forget how that wonderful kiss felt and how sweet the sexual tension and anticipation before it was. He plays stuff like that OVER AND OVER again the whole damn day.
While being on physical stuff, he is pretty horny ill say. But not in a bunny way,m where he wants to fuck 5 times a day, but rather when around his girl he's always half way up, always ready to rise for the occasion iykwim. I think he gets *excited*👀 very easily and is just really weak when it comes to his girl. He's always ready to deliver whenever she ask, whatever she asks. Als im seeing once again he's a giver (and despite him loving head so much) he's focused on her pleasure and he can off just from watching her enjoy...whatever it is. So yeah thats that😂
Bro im so tired im thinking about doing this in 2 parts😭 im just halfway. Ok yk what im splitting it.
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vexwerewolf · 10 months ago
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Felicitations, comrade! We had our session 0 for the IGF campaign im running, and one of my players wants to be a moonlighter pirate "infiltrating" Hell's Gate militia. He was initially thinking of being affiliated with the Hell Hounds, which for obvious reasons would present some challenges. Do you have any advice for making this happen, what with the very first mission putting him up against his true boss? I dont know that he'd have enough time to have truly built up camraderie with the rest of the SRT to truly make his character have conflicted loyalties.
I mean, he'd have to have been with the militia a while to build up enough trust to be seriously considered for the SRT.
But moreover, let me tell you what being a Hell Hound is like.
CW: psychological and physical abuse
So one thing I want to make it clear that the Hell Hounds are basically an incel cult without the weird gender-sexual overtones. I imagine there ARE women and enbies who join it but in essence Andros Capella is a creepy weirdo who preys on disaffected, primarily male youth with no prospects and indoctrinates them into his worldview of nihilistic violence.
Andros doesn't really have a philosophy, or at least not one that he could describe in words (and even if he could, he wouldn't), but it could be summed up as "the weak exist solely to create things for the strong to take." You are worthy of having things if you are strong enough to take them, but only so long as you're strong enough to keep them.
The closest political ideology I could ascribe to him would be "stateless fascism." Andros is certainly sadistic, devoid of empathy and believes himself to be supreme, but he's too intellectually lazy to bother engaging in justifying why he's supreme. He makes the most basic of naturalistic arguments (i.e. "this is just the way the world works") but feels it's beneath him to actually justify or provide evidence for his claims.
He hates the minutiae of day-to-day life, and derives no joy from anything that doesn't involve someone else's discomfort or pain. He will steal your food for the sheer thrill of having taken something that you wanted to eat, but he won't enjoy eating it because he despises the physical sensations of chewing and swallowing.
And if you are a Hell Hound who, god forbid, enjoys something, he will bully the shit out of you. He will verbally and physically abuse you until you learn to hate the thing you liked just to make the pain stop.
Lemme tell you what the average night on Fort Cerberus looks like when you're not on a raid: you and a couple hundred other sick fucks lurk around the corridors drinking and gambling but you sure as hell better not actually look like you're having fun because you're all desperately trying to avoid becoming the bossman's next chew toy.
Some poor fuck catches Andros' eye. You're not sure what for, but from the sounds of things he might've been counting his poker winnings too loud. He gets a hand on his shoulder from the big man, who tells him that he's being too selfish - gotta learn to share a bit more, yeah? Now, way Andros sees it, guy's got ten fingernails that he's keeping all to himself, so here's a set of pliers - redistribute.
You jeer along with the rest of the room, loud enough to drown out his screams, because you're so very, very relieved that it isn't you. But you fuck up. You look a little bit too enthusiastic, perhaps, or maybe it's the opposite, maybe you weren't forcing it enough. Either way, the bossman's eyes land on you and your blood turns to ice in your veins.
"You," he says. "C'mere."
The room is dead silent all of a sudden, quiet enough that the pitiful whimpering of the first guy, (currently on his second thumbnail) is the only sound you can hear. You walk over, as a prisoner does to the place of execution.
He takes your hands, inspecting your fingernails, and then your hands, then your arms. "No ink yet? You not pulling your weight? Am I payin' to feed a fuckin' leech?"
You say you're not a leech.
"Those pricks over at the Gate are gettin' too clever. Learning too quick. Gettin' the jump on us too many times. I want someone over there learnin' what they know. You 'avin' no ink makes you a good choice. They'd sniff out any of these boys in a second, they would, but not you. You look soft. Don't he look soft, boys?"
The room jeers at you just as you jeered at the first guy (he's on his ninth nail, now, and his throat is so hoarse he can't make sounds anymore). You try your best to remain composed.
"Normally soft'd be fuckin' worthless. But soft'll let you blend right in with the Gaters."
So, to avoid whatever horrific torture he's currently ideating, you agree. The next time they go out on a raid, they pick a ship full of people who don't know each other and slip you in with the passengers when nobody's looking. You don't go to Hell's Gate directly - you do a couple of hops through the Thousand Habs, just to throw off suspicion.
You sue for residency on the station as a refugee from a failed habitat. They give you your own cabin, and they make sure you're fed and clothed. You smirk to yourself - they really are as soft as Andros said they'd be; they have food and water and clothes and they're just giving them away!
You don't have all that many marketable skills, so after a few rotations scrubbing air filters, you apply to take the militia aptitude test. You try to play it down so they don't get suspicious, but if nothing else you're a damn good pilot, so you get fast-tracked. These fucking idiots just give you a mech! God, it's gonna be so easy to tear them apart from the inside.
They put you in a team. You train together, building up hours in the simulators. Then something weird happens. They... trust you? They want to... spend time with you, outside the simulators. They want to drink with you, play games with you, hear about your life. Well, is it more suspicious if you say no? You have to maintain your cover.
You don't always fit in well. Sometimes you crack jokes that are... a little unpleasant, a little off, a little worrying, and you learn to bite those down because it's bad for your cover. You also have this odd air about you, like you're constantly on guard, like you're waiting for the other shoe to drop (like somebody's gonna make you rip your fingernails out if you're too happy). People figure you must've gone through some trauma and are kind stupid enough not to pry.
You feed information about the militia back to Andros - carefully, so as not to blow your cover. Some members of your team get hurt - nobody dies, but they get hurt. You feel... bad. Why do you feel bad? They're soft, they're weak, they don't mean anything. They're not your real friends. You don't have any friends.
Months pass. Jerry says he wants to tap your team for a long-standing project he's working on. This is your chance. Sabotaging this will prove to Andros that you're strong, that you're not weak, that you're not a leech, that you can pull your weight.
Sure, a bunch of your team will have to die. The only people who've ever put their trust in you, the only people who've ever believed in you. But that's fine, right? They don't mean anything, they're not real people, right? They're idiots for trusting you, right? They deserve it, right?
Right?
... right?
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jermer10 · 1 year ago
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Hello👋 i dont know if you can but, can you do a drabble of yandere Sniper [tf2] stalking and kidnapping the reader[gender neutral]? And that he keeps them locked up in his camper van?
And uhhh, if you can the reader loves him right back?👉👈
If you cant do the stockholm syndrome thing, i get it. But at least do yandere Sniper please.
TF2 yandere sniper drabbles
suggestive, gn reader | this prompt was so fun!! tysm for the ask :)
tw: stalking, kidnapping, obsession, depictions of wounds and blood, drugging, abusive relationship, reader falling in love with yandere
drabbles under the cut :P
- you were aware of his existence a long time before meeting him, and whilst you had dealt with creeps and weirdos before, this guy was....different... - waking up during the night and feeling a presence in the room, yet finding no one once the lights were turned on; catching a glimpse of someone from the corner of your eye, and turning around to see nothing - for the longest time you had felt insane! "you're just paranoid!" you'd hear from friends and family - and then you had your first encounter with him at your local cafe whilst in the lineup ordering your coffee - okay, well, you weren't certain that it was him, but the way his bluish-grey eyes bore into yours with such an obsessive, aching, needy want caused you to put two and two together - and much to your dismay, he had realized that you knew - you brushed past him, hoping he wouldn't follow you, hoping that you could make it home in time to pack a bag or two so you could stay with a friend for the night - but you only made it half way down the street before being pulled into an alleyway and feeling the sharp jab of a needle in your shoulder
- you must have fought for several minutes before finally passing out, because upon waking there were bruises and scuff marks littering your skin - the second thing you noticed once you gained consciousness was the leg of camper van pull-out table you were tied to - if you had the strength, you would have kicked the table upwards and slid your ducktaped wrists off of the leg, yet your drowsiness and the numbness of your legs told you that trying to escape would be futile - for a second you considered screaming out - someone, anyone must be able to hear you, you couldn’t have gone too far out of town - you hear the stifled laugh of a man from the other side of the van - you turned sharply to look at the man, when an overbearing wave of nausea and dizziness rushed over you. “fuck!” you hissed, squeezing your eyes shut - the man chuckled, and from what courage you could muster, you glanced up at him. he was….handsome? - ‘fucking gross y/n! don’t think that about this guy! he KIDNAPPED YOU!’ the reality of the situation had finally set in - “who are you?! where am i?! please, please just let me go and I wont tell anyone about this! I’ll give you whatever you want! please don’t kill me!” you had started to sob - through the blurry tears you saw him get up and walk closer to you, his brown boots clacking against the floor rung in your head like gun shots - “shut up. I took ya because you’re the thing I want. I’ve been followin’ you for a while and I know you know about it. I got tired of waitin’, so I made myself known, that’s all.” his face was serious, his voice condescending, as if it were obvious - you felt hopeless, pathetic, and manic. you started to scream, cry, thrash around pathetically whilst he stood over you. he lit a cigarette and blew some smoke down at you - “we are a looooong way away from any people darl’, so it would be easier for both of us if you played nice” the man spat, and walked towards the exit of the camper van, grabbing a sniper rifle out of a locked compartment in the wall - “if you’re not here when i get back, i will kill you, y/n.” and with that, he left.
- months had gone by, and eventually you had grown placid, sitting under that table on your makeshift bed day in, day out while the man you had eventually grown to know as Mundy monitored you, fed you, bathed you, and clothed you - you had gained his trust, therefore he decided it would be best to remove your constraints - while he was at work you would rummage through his belongings to find out more about him; what hobbies he had, where he was from, his likes and dislikes - you found a photo of his parents and casually asked him about them one day. he was taken aback by your curiosity, yet he told you stories about his childhood and you shared some of your own - you couldn’t even hate him anymore, you had actually grown fond of the man in your time spent with him, but there was no fucking way he could know that. you still wanted to escape from this sicko and return to your old life - but what even was your old life? your 9 to 5 job, coming home to an empty house every day, the constant feeling of being watched with no one to believe you - suddenly your situation seemed a lot better than what you were previously stuck with - that night you had awoken, startled by a wounded and bloody Mundy stumbling through the camper van doors. “holy shit, are you okay?” you hated how it came out so earnestly - luckily for you, the concern had seemingly gone unnoticed as he had sat himself on the floor next to you, peering into your eyes for some kind of permission with a guilt and bashfulness you hadn’t seen from him thus far - you didn’t know what to do or say, so you nodded slightly, and on cue he pressed himself into your side, burying his face in the crook of your neck - he smelt like cigarettes, dirt, and gore - you didn’t ask, and he didn’t tell, but you knew he had a hard day at work. no matter what his job was, you knew all too well the feeling of coming home after a shitty shift and sobbing into your pillows. you often wonder if Mundy ever saw that side of you, sides you hadn’t shown anyone - you held each other in this awkward side hug for what felt like both hours and seconds, you honestly didn’t want to let go, but he was still bleeding out and you had been dirtied - “wanna shower?” you asked chastely. it felt uncomfortable asking your captor for something so….sweet? he glanced at you, attempting to hide the shock in his face - “yeah, okay.” he mumbled, slowly letting go of your warmth and standing up shakily, you followed in suit and head into the cramped bathroom
- by this point you had already been naked around Mundy, he refused to let you shower by yourself and most days you had been so exhausted you had looked forward to him washing you - but you had never caught a glimpse of what was under his work uniform or the red plaid pyjama slacks and white t-shirt he wore around the van, and a small part of you was nervous, but a huge part of you anticipated the reveal - you stripped yourself and climbed into the tub, chin resting on your knees, hugging your legs, and staring up at the tall, lanky man - a red tinge glossed his dirty face, clearly this was a vulnerable spot for him, and you couldn’t help but respond with your own red cheeks in turn - “….are you jumping in or what…?” you couldn’t look at him, the only sound louder than the thumping of your heart in your chest was the water spilling from the tap filling the tub - “ah- yeah just uh, gimme a second,” he murmured, removing his jacket and unbuttoning his top - his chest and back were scarred, some old, some new. you felt a pang of sadness. the irony of this situation was not lost on you, feeling more remorseful over hating this man than he does for kidnapping you, but you couldn’t help it. he was so raw, so genuine - he had stripped bare, and climbed into the tub facing away from you, handing you a bar of soap, you absentmindedly washed his back, it felt all too natural to you, maybe it was the steam of the shower, maybe it was the exhaustion that came from sleeping on the cold, hard floor of the camper every night with nothing but a blanket and pillow to keep you comfortable, but something about being here now, with Mundy, felt so right - “I think I’m in love with you,” you spoke softly, so softly you were sure he couldn't even hear the whisper, and before you could react, Mundy turned and pulled you into a rough kiss. you melted into it, running your soapy hands through his auburn hair. eyebrows furrowed and face burning, he pulled away - “wanna sleep in my bed tonight?"
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norissisca · 4 days ago
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“I wish to be with you in my final moments, my love”
PTII — TEASER
Satoru x Suguru x Non-Sorc!Reader
DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT : fempov
content warning : gore, thoughts of cannibalism, death, angst, miscarriage, alcohol, mention of rape, horror themes, psychosis, suicide
a/n : I felt bad for making my snookums wait and with my recent problems with tumblr and then deleting my whole draft, I had to re-write it so here is the beginning teaser of ptII. I hope you guys can tell what the first bit of the fanfics are, hehe always love challenging people into little puzzles
PT I
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August 10th, 2017, at around midnight,
Commence of investigation and assessment
Like usual he had to say something snarky, always having the last word to those elders. . . God, I should’ve killed them ages ago. But whatever. A smirked piqued as he spun around his heel and pulled up his blindfold, concealing his icy blue eyes, as if the thought of seeing those old ragged men seeing a flash of purple before they were wiped clean from the Earth gave him euphoria.
“Fucking hell. . . Seriously, it’s just a body that is unidentifiable, these second-grades keep getting more pathetic and pathetic as they go. Makes my white hair turn whi— no, no, no, black.”
He would whine and complain, swinging his hands around to express more dramatic key to how he’s currently feeling. He’d teleport himself to the site, stretching his lanky arms and his long legs took wide steps, shoving his hands in his pocket with a pout on his face. Striding past Ijichi as he began his usual “important” rambling, breaking down the suspicion of the attack and how the investigation will play out which as expected Satoru literally always ignore him and simply waved his hand as if he already knows everything.
“Soooo. . . Do you know who this person is or are we gonna play guess who with this body.”
Ijichi would adjust his glasses as he let out a soft sigh as he had to repeat himself yet again. Satoru nodding as he continued with the information.
“Gojo-san, if you heard me correctly, the body is completely mutilated to the point the body is unidentifiable, we don’t even know the sex of the person. . . At the moment all we are suspecting is that this curse must’ve eaten its way in or out of the lower stomach, we be—“
“Euughhh! Now thats just gross, I’ll give credit to the curse for trynna be a weirdo. Cause that’s just outright weird, but nothin that isn’t past my big leagues.”
“Right. Anyways, as I was stating, we believe this theory because although the body is completely disorientated we can tell it was from the lower stomach due to the massive hole in it that its the focal point of the attack.”
Satoru would abruptly stopped walking making Ijichi speed walking into a halt which merely made him skid to the pole in front of him. Satoru would tug one of his hand out of his pocket and lazily point to the alleyway with the corpse in it. Although they can’t see the body yet due to how deep it was into the alleyway, it was evidential that it was there because of the rotting stench kissing their noses and that made the both of them grimace (mostly Ijichi).
“If that’s so, has any of you dudes found the curse yet?”
“Uh, no. That’s why you’re here, the second grade won’t talk. He’s in a state of shock from seeing the body, so it was quite hard to ask if he’s seen the curse or not.”
“Welp! I’m only guessing you want me to ask?. . . Jesus, ‘state of shock’. This guy is obviously weak as hell, can’t even handle the sight of a body torn up!”
He would’ve grumble the insult underneath his breath, obviously he was currently pissed off as the investigation is being dragged out even more all because some second grade is being a pussy. Ijichi notice the aura change of Satoru, which made him a teeny bit scared of him.
Man, I wonder how my sweets is pulling up. Lowk kinda worried about her since the past few weeks, she’s been acting strange. . . Like real fuckin’ stran—
Until it struck him. The scent of nostalgia, it reminded him back in his school days. That smell coming from the alleyway where the body was located, it was no doubt. . . Suguru
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nogenderbee · 6 months ago
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♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ ℝ𝕠𝕓𝕠-ℝ𝕦𝕚 ₊˚ˑ༄
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ @sucodelaranja86 request: UHI DONT KNOW IF ITS STILL OPEN BUT IF YES
Rui who gives a mini robo-rui for his s/o 🙏
(yes i am still obsessed with that)
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ DW I GOT YOUUU
I swear I loved writing it >w< Hopefully you'll like it a bit too!!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ fluff
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Rui has been acting really weird recently... sure, he is a little special snowflake naturally which you loved about him, but he's been even weirder than he usually is!
Because why is he so persistant on coming into his room first and panickly runs around whenever you visit him? And one day you even caught him putting some planket over... something... you have no idea what that is, since you never got clear look at it. But you were sure of one thing... he was hiding something.
Tho one day, you finally caught something more...
It started by him casually running into his room before you even get closer to the door and covering something with the blanket, fixing it by the time you entered, as if making sure you won't be able to see anything.
"What are you hiding there?"
"I told you before, you'll get to know that soon enough!"
"You said the same thing week ago..."
"It's simply... not ready yet."
You just sighed and made yourself comfy on his couch. Whatever was under that blanket cleaerly still on your mind, as you tried to figure out what it could be by looking at whatever was inside.
"Fufu~ Don't think about it too much..."
"Why's there 2 yellow lights?"
"Huh-?"
Looking back at the blanket, he noticed 2 gold lights that were still visible through materials... and he knows he got himself a problem right here, since he has to turn it off before it overheats... but you're also here...
"Darling... may I ask you to... turn around?"
He scratched the back of his neck, a bit nervous and embarrassed he had to ask you to do something like that just because of his mistake.
"Oh no, I'm getting to know what it is. It's about time after what... 3 weeks?"
"2 and a half..."
Boy sighed to himself, letting his hands drop to his side. His eyes looking for any sign of cooperation from you, yet your crossed arms were a clear sign to him... you weren't about to back away...
"Alright... just... please keep in mind I'm not sure about it yet..."
"It's okey!"
You reassured already excited to see what he was hiding for so long!
Once he lifted the blanket, you saw... Robo-Rui? It looks like it... it's similiar to Robo-Nene from the s tyle it's built, but it looks like Rui instead of looking like Nene...
"Is this..."
"Heh~ You said so many times you'd love a Robo-Me... and since our anniversary is coming up... I thought you may like it..."
He was clearly flustered now. As if not sure if you'll thank him or call him a weirdo for what he did.
"Seriously?! I love it!!"
But luckily for him, your eyes were already sparkling with happines once you saw the robot and heard why he made it! Giving him a big reassuring hug, which he gladly took and let his arms relax.
"Hm~ Well... would you like to see few options? I can't let you take it since it's 99% safe, and... I'd prefer to not risk with that 1%..."
"Oh asbolutely! I'll gladly see whatever you have to show me!"
"Well, my dear... you already saw the lights, which I planned to be a little source of light for you at all times or even to scare off some people when you put it in the dark~"
"Haha~ Of course you had that idea..."
"Can you blame me? But! There's also like... 12 other functions of which 10 are ready, and today, I'll be showing you... 6!"
He was clearly not a lot calmer as he explained and showed you few functions of the Robo-Rui, not wanting to show you all, so you'd still have some stuff to discover on your own when he finally gives it to you!
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
@bleachtheidiot @akitosheart @yulikesminori @toyaswif3y @bl4cktourmaline @superstar-ethereal @stellas-starry-stories13 @alicewinterway18 @hakulivesformusic @wabatle @sucodelaranja86 - come get your crazy inventor~
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meimeimeirin · 4 days ago
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still on tumblr break, but since i just logged in and saw several asks, i thought i'd clarify a few things here.
regarding me and @/zhongrin
in summary:
zhongrin is privated and archived permanently.
for the two people who asked, yeah, i'm alright.
more utc, but you can skip.
to expand more on the 'sudden' archiving/privating:
i've been debating to archive the blog since last year. to tell the truth, the new theme that appeared in zhongrin since september last year was actually the theme of a new writing sideblog i made. honestly, i had contemplated archiving it since july ー and i've lost count over how many times i created a 'blog archived' post only to delete it, over and over again. i just held on like an idiot and kept telling myself to just post and dip out.
don't look at the activity bar, it's just going to be full of likes. don't look at the notes, i'll just be full of more empty likes. don't look at the reblogs, it won't have any feedback anyway. don't look into your inbox, you won't find any feedback whatsoever anyway. don't look at your dash, lest you'll see other people getting interactions and start wondering if you're the weirdo for not getting any. don't look. don't look. don't look.
i'm just so tired of being disappointed.
it's like writing out a play and 10k people reserved seats to your free performance, yet all you see are thousands of absent seats. all you receive are silent smiles. a few applauses. and less than ten people commenting on the play, most of which are your own friends.
every time i post, i start questioning why did i even bother sharing this. or if i'm even actually good enough at writing. or if that comment was just there out of pity. or if i should have used the time i spent writing, proofreading, and editing to do something else. something that would have brought more joy. something that would result in more than a few strung words on a digital screen that no one thinks is worth sharing.
every time i post, it just feels like i just did something meaningless. every time i do events or bring my ocs to the spotlight, every time i'm having so much fun, people leave and it gets even more silent. my thoughts? my expectations? my joy? my sadness? meaningless. they're all meaningless to these ten thousand people.
why should i keep sharing and doing something that feels meaningless and hopeless?
so i stopped caring and archived. that's all there is to it.
i do have that new writing blog set up. way back since last year. because as much as i loathe the silence, i still love writing. sometimes.
as of today, that blog is still devoid of original posts. i don't know when or if i'll feel comfortable posting my own 'content' again. or maybe i never will. who knows. but if i do, this time, i'm setting things up so i can just be the 'content creator' that readers expect me to be and distance myself from everything.
call me childish. call me jaded. call me a bitch. i don't care. i don't want to try connecting with my readers anymore because tumblr as a community has stopped being a system that can do this. i'm just going to give myself the option of making content and dipping out whenever i want. i'm going to spend my energy having fun with my friends who does care - on a separate, more controlled environment altogether.
this will still be my main since i don't want to bother setting up a new account and re-following people again. but i won't be active here. i foresee i'll be more 'present' in my private blog. for those who does have the url ー please keep it a secret. thanks.
bye, zhongrin. it started out fun. it's a shame it ended on a bitter note. i truly wish it hadn't turned out this way.
signing off once again, meirin.
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