#i have written many poems about the situation but i have got to write a play holy fuck

[dykeofmisfortune]

i want to write a play again but idk what to write it on. i run sound for this play festival that produces original student plays and oh mein gott they're so good. i NEED to get something i write produced

[wonder-mei]

Letting Life Lead Part 2 (MK1 Bi-han)

Reminder: this is not lore accurate to the Mortal Kombat universe. I write because they're hot. I also do not have a beta reader or I read my fanfic from top to bottom to see any errors. I'm lazy okay.

I forgot to include an idea in the previous fan fic so here’s a sequel. Consume it well.

—

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

Ever since she was a teen, many of her friends and girls around her age got into relationships with people they were interested in. Some until it led to marriage and some broke up. And from that she learned; not everyone can have happily ever after with their first love or when someone thinks their partner is the one. 

But there is one conversation her friends always frown upon. Arranged marriage. They said it is too out of time and unethical because of how it won’t give that person no choice to defy. When the rumour of her getting arranged with the oldest son of the Lin Kuei clan grandmaster. Her friends sent her condolences which she understands because everyone describes Bi-han is as cold as his cryo power and very stern to be the best for his clan. 

And they were all wrong. Very wrong about him. 

The wife of Bi-han turns her head towards the door slides and her husband enters with his arms on his back hiding something. “Welcome home” she greets with a smile and drops the brush she has been using for hours on the wooden table in their room “What’s that?” 

Bi-han approaches her and places a box wrapped in cloth on the table. She curiously unfolds then opens the box and reveals her favorite sweets inside. She smiles cheekily at Bi-han “Your Po Po won’t like this” even with that word she eats them anyway.

Just this evening before the maids cook lunch she requested for her favorite sweet but out of nowhere Bi-han’s grandmother came into the kitchen “You cannot eat that food! They are unhealthy”

She then came into their bedroom with a frown in her face “What’s wrong?” Bi-han asked but she didn't answer,one of her quirk when she is upset. Bi-han sighs leaving his wife alone to soothe her emotion off alone as she is comfortable to do it on her own alone. He went to the maids asking what happened to his wife and it was his grandmother once again being strict with her wife. 

Now Bi-han can now be at ease seeing his wife eating the food she craves today. He caresses her head as she eats. He then holds the paper she wrote a poem on, a talent of hers. She writes her thoughts and nature as her hobby. It reads;

The sun arise at dawn,

And the moon moves away for it to shine,

Even the sun is brighter than the moon,

The moon is still there for the sun,

Even it is not a star,

Giving light to earth,

The moon will be by the sun’s side,

Nonetheless and forever.

Bi-han smiles as he reads the poem. He stands up to put it on the wall with the other poems. His wall used to be blank and nothingness and now the walls are covered with poetry she had written. Even the poem she dislikes, he still stick them on the wall saying ‘Still written with your heart��

After she finished eating. They both sleep for the night together. And the morning came, they both ate breakfast together. The grandmother came in to join too. “Young lady, I told you to wear Beizi! It is the clan’s tradition for the women to wear Beizi everyday” she nags pointing at her Aoqun attire.

Bi-han sighs, gripping his fists under the table. His wife is pouting again at the nagging “I told her to wear Aoqun today”, he said with a gruff. The grandmother scowls in annoyance. His grandson is backing up his wife again as he always does. The old lady left the couple alone. The wife hugs his arm as a Thank You. Bi-han knows she is fond of wearing Beizi as her daily attire every day. Bi-han would occasionally back up his wife in whatever situations. 

“You have been married to her for 6 months and she is still not pregnant. It seems like she is useless!”

“It is my decision to not have a child now”

“Why is she not wearing blue? She is your wife and it’s symbolized she is your property”

“I told her to wear that”

“A married woman shouldn’t walk around the village!”

“I made her to walk outside”

“She still acts like a child! She’s very childish”

“I will teach her”

But he didn’t. He let her be herself. Bi-han understands that she is his wife but she is still young and has a lot of experiences to discover for her curiosity. She can still hangout with her friends or play with the clan’s kids. Even though she was given a lot of freedom, she still respected him as her husband and set her own limit for his comfort. 

What are the odds, a man as cold as Bi-han is the greatest husband every woman wishes for. Her friends are jealous that her husband worships her like a deity and loves her as her own. From fear to adoration the women view Bi-han but he won’t even take a glance at them. He already has his wife who sees good in him just from the first glance they shared. No judgement in her eyes,only acceptance.

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

P.S: i don't know how to write poem so i'm sorry if it's bad lol

[luminous-jade-skies]

在心而在心思

In Heart and In Mind

Foresight 远见 (written as of patch 1.0)

Pairing: Jing Yuan/Vidyadhara! Reader

Content: rated M, complicated relationships, fluff, humour, complicated feelings, potentially older man/younger woman (the situation is complicated), morally grey fic, leaning yandere! Jing Yuan, minors dni

This is really long, like really long. I’ve been writing this for like a week or two (might’ve been two). Also as mentioned in the contents, it’s quite a weird situation (which makes it fun). I don’t recommend minors reading this because (no offence) it takes a bit of discretion. 在心而在心思 may also be a series (not chronological), so if you liked this one, there may be potentially more in the future.

I actually lost my 50/50 to Clara at 85 pulls which pained me greatly to the point where I swore off gacha games for a bit. Then I decided to swipe and got him in around 65. I also pulled for his lightcone and got it in 1 ten pull, so I’ll take that as his apology ahahaha. Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

———————————————————————————————————

“Amidst the falling golden light of the Arbor Glowing roots spread across the ship Conflict blooming from its branches, the pale aurora flames.

Where gingko leaves fall and dance in the wind Blood and despair follows Halls of humanity, forgotten in the pride bred from our bones. 

Thus sings our short history Where legends live and never die…”

Your brush draws out the last stroke of the character onto your scroll, the golden paint appearing on the brown reflective surface just in time for you to meet the matching irises of the Divine Foresight. 

“Late. Again.” The scroll is rolled and snapped shut—poem incomplete—and tucked into your bag. Its red tassel hangs out teasingly. “General, after many centuries I expect you to be less tardy.”

He plops down on the stool of the teahouse in front of you, making himself comfortable by crossing his leg and leaning his elbows on the table. “Oh?” He says with playful amusement. He reaches over to pinch your cheek which you immediately dodge. “If you’ve known me for so long, why still call me ‘general,’ hm?”

You huff. “Firstly, you’re my superior, I must address you as such. Secondly, I know you, not in heart, but in mind. If everything written in my past self’s journal is true, then you have hardly changed.”

As soon as Jing Yuan confirms an order of two Immortal’s Delight, he chuckles. “So you’ve finished reading all the journals?”

“Of course not, there’s so much to read! If you told me I was a writer in my past life I wouldn’t be surprised. I just finished reading volume twelve.” You cross your arms. 

“Oh? You’ve finished all twelve already?”

“No, I started from the most recent years. The information seems the most relevant, like recent developments in my job and instructions on how to deal with them. That being said, you’re not keeping anything from me aren’t you?” You eyed him suspiciously. 

He feigned hurt, wincing and throwing a dramatic hand to clutch his heart. “Did your past self write such terrible things about me? I miss when you acted carefreely, especially when you would rush into my arms without care.”

“I’m old enough to not be doing that!” You exclaimed, hiding your face behind your hand in embarrassment. After taking a quick second to compose yourself (wisely covered up with a fed-up groan), you clarify your pointed suspicion in a hushed tone. “The journal mentions how I was supposed to begin working as soon as I reached five years old. I’m fifteen now and I’ve only started.” 

It’s true. You were supposed to start when you were five. If everything had gone according to your past self’s plan, you would master literacy by three and finish most of your studies by five like “how you always did” as you had told him. However, Jing Yuan had different plans. You were catching on quickly that he wasn’t honouring your wishes as you had wanted them exactly. But it would take more deduction and action than merely suspicion to nail him in his sins. 

“If I were as wise as my past self seemed to have been, then I would not trust my reincarnation to solely one person, even if he was the Divine Foresight. It puts me in too much a vulnerable position.”

Jing Yuan sighs, but not of discontent. Returning to his leisurely posture, he stares at you from beneath his lashes lazily, saying. “You’re so cute in your caution.”

If any Outworlders were nearby to witness the mild flirt, they would have shot a concerned look at Jing Yuan. Was this middle-aged man making passive moves on a young girl?! If they tried looking around at other passersby, they would find no such reaction. With one glance at the girl in question, locals would notice the Vidyadhara horns and the red Erudition eye painted on the middle of her forehead, then continue on their day. Afterall, the Sky-Faring Logistics Master could take care of herself. 

The Dozing General always kept alertness just below the shallows of ease. You were a big deal in the Sky-Faring Commision, handling everything that involved the movement of goods of any kind. The seven Luofu Sky-Faring Commision Guilds imported and exported all sorts of products, but you arranged the receiving and releasing of said products. Suffice it to say, without you, the flow of hundred thousands of containers moving through the Luofu would be clashing in a blinding chaos. Much of the laymen didn’t realise that the ever-capable Logistics Master had not been at her post for the past ten years. Merely seeing you led them to assume you were doing your job as usual. As for admin and employees within the Commision… the temporary Master’s term had to be extended with the additional request (read: order) that any concerns were put to rest assuringly. Now, he had been relieved with good compensation and you were put in your proper position, everything would continue as normal.

No harm done.

Jing Yuan’s lips twitched when you scoff at his comment. “Still saying such things?” You say. “Hmph, my past self might have tolerated it, but I won’t. If you like her so much, then show me the same respect!”

“Why not act as casually as I treat you? Even the staff at the Seat call me Jing Yuan.” He leaned forward with a blossoming innocent smile. “You’re already acting so haughty and you’ve only just received your journals, have you forgotten who your official guardian is?”

“I knew it! My previous incarnation was a fool to put me in your hands!” You whined.

Mengming comes over just in time to stop your pouting fest with two refreshingly cold Immortal’s Delight. As you drag the drink closer, the expertly swirled fluffy whipped cream hardly bobs on top of the blended milk tea drink. A tiny hum of approval leaves your now grinning lips. That meant the drink was freshly blended, ice crystals still solid in the ideally near-frozen treat. Sprinkled on top is a generous cluster of brown sugar bits, glistening in what light sneaks into the shaded tea shop, as if the sweet syrupy goodness layered at the bottom of the same ingredient wasn’t enough. It forms a murky fog that swirls cloudily with the liquid, just waiting to be stirred and messed about inside the cup. Hiding amidst the murk are bouncy and chewy pearls, treasures you can’t wait to hunt with the red straw. 

You waste no time taking a big gulp, uncaring of how the freeze travels straight to your brain. A sugary explosion bursts in your mouth, accompanied by the slight bitterness of the tea in the most uplifting manner. Unaware of how the bliss draws happy hum after hum, you chew on the pearls. Your hair sways side to side with your head, hands gripping the drink tightly like the magical treat it was. 

The general takes a sip of his own, and savours the taste with you with closed eyes. Your past self was not here for the drink’s creation, and your go-to refreshment was a personally brewed pot of Whale-Tide Spring tea. Your present self, however, was less interested in the archaic drink and preferred the more modern one. What a shock it was to him when you refused another sip of the tea, letting out a small ‘bleh’ after only the first. In contrast, your love for Immortal’s Delight was as strong as your past love for Whale-Tide Spring (which was saying quite a lot, you always had a porcelain jar full of the leaves). 

Ever since its introduction, Immortal’s Delight has been a hit with the Luofu locals, but especially with you. His original intention was to reintroduce you to your favourite tea, but with how sideways that went, he tried something else. Yes, he received weird looks from others as he ushered a toddler to take a sip of the chilly thick drink, but you loved it in the end so that was that. It was also of great amusement to him how you cried and grabbed for it when he threatened to finish the rest of it. And yes, he gave you an extra sip because you learnt how to ask nicely that day. 

His eyes open to return to your form. Visions of the past overlaid themselves with the present. Past you was elegant, dignified with that slight tinge of whimsy. Present you was excitable, childish, bursting with a starlight that shone from your eyes—something he supposed could be called ‘youthful innocence.’ He wonders if this is what you were like in your younger days… thousands of years ago. You had mentioned how millenia of diligent journaling has maintained your wisdom’s edge no matter how many times you’ve moulted. It’s a well-known fact in the Xianzhou Luofu that the Sky-Faring Logistics Master never changes. Same name, same personality, somehow you’ve managed to create a unique sense of immortality…  

‘I’ll be moulting soon. I must ensure that all my knowledge and character are well-documented for my next reincarnation,’ you told him one day. Back then, he was a young apprentice under Jingliu, helping to move boxes of journals to your new residence. It was sunny that day, and he had just finished another exercise of 10,000 sword strokes, but he was eager to help as soon as he caught a glimpse of you in the distance. He had asked why you kept so many records, refusing to admit his struggle with the weight yet still feeling the strain of them all the same. 

‘Why does your reincarnation need to know all this?’

You tilt your head over your shoulder to smile at him, long horns extending gracefully in an arch against the bright sky. ‘I have been master over the Luofu’s goods flow for longer than you can ever imagine. Whether it be the receiving of commercial goods for residents or sending military supplies to our Cloud Knights, the hand that draws lanes and guides starskiffs must be an experienced one. The history of trade is great and the eyes that witness are the eyes that must be preserved.’ 

You wave a hand lightly at the box he carries. ‘—hence my records.’

He wonders just how much you’ve changed under his care. Letting you develop with hardly any direct influence from your past self must’ve affected you somehow. Not that he wanted you to change, Lan forbid. He loved you dearly, and he’s seen you be reborn over and over. He still dreams of every life you've lived and every moment you shared with him. As a good friend of his parents who worked in the Realm-Keeping Commision, he’s known you even before joining the Cloud Knights. Respect turned into admiration, then adoration, and further still in his adolescent years, a boyish crush which developed into an intimate love (and the lust that accompanies it) that he disguises under a close and familiar friendship. 

Qingzu likes to say ‘when the Sky-Faring Logistics Master steps into the Seat of Divine Foresight, the Dozing General dozes no longer.’ So perhaps he isn’t subtle about his feelings at all. 

Jing Yuan finds himself enjoying you enjoy your drink rather than enjoying the drink itself. You’re adorable, unbearably so. He’s met you in this age before but you’re always trying so hard to maintain your poise that he hasn’t seen you act this way. Really, you’re quite different now. As a kid you would quite literally jump for joy when he bought your favourite food or read you your favourite books. Pouting wasn’t a strange occurrence either. Sometimes he indulges in a little bullying to rile you up, have you stomping all over the place before giving you what you wanted. He watches you happily sip away, practically able to see warmth blossoming around you from joy. 

Your past selves never pouted nor showed excessive joy, and you had grown into it. He had noticed how the pressure to continue the legacy of your first life strained you, whether it be in the tired narrow of your eyes or the hollow sigh you let spill out. You may be the same in biological make-up, but really, you were successors of someone with very high standards and ambition… or were possibly part of a social experiment (he vocalised that joke at some point and you only shrugged, saying you could understand the intrigue which only makes it more plausible). 

The idea that he had ruined you somehow sent excited tingles zipping around in his brain. He had not only yourself in his grasp, but your very personality. When he made the decision to be your guardian, he wasn’t thinking of this indirect consequence. Clutching your bloody egg in his arms, the scene of your head getting cleaved off replaying countlessly in his mind, all he could think about was how he had to protect you and keep you close. 

So now you were his adorable little charge, and in the future, hopefully, his beautiful wife. He’s made sure to keep his hands off you, it was distasteful to even attempt and would dishonour you and your past incarnations. But his feelings were very true and well… you were still you. Regardless of how different you acted. 

“Why are you suddenly looking so happy…” you asked, nudging the empty cup away. “You haven’t touched your drink, if you don’t want it, can I?”

Just as you say that he takes a huge sip of his Immortal’s Delight, causing a considerable amount to disappear. And much to his delight, you frown a little and keep your eyes on him albeit with an unimpressed expression. 

“Now now, no need to make that face,” he mellowly drawls. “I’ve been so distracted by the beauty in front of me that my drink has become watery, how will you compensate?”

“General, I will throw my bag at you!”

He chuckles and continues to languidly sip, watching your face turn red. ‘How satisfying,’ he thinks. Long ago such teasing would only warrant a polite dismissal from you, even if you were blushing. Now he wonders what other expressions he could draw from you…

Two empty cups are left on the table as the both of you leave for a stroll. Jing Yuan had arranged for this lunch break meeting since he hardly sees you anymore. He missed when he could take you with him to his office, it certainly made those boring days go by a lot faster. On days where he’s forced to stay up late signing documents or going over a deployment plan, you’re there sleeping soundly on his lap. It only takes a single glance down to restore his energy. Now that you’re working he only ever gets to see you in the mornings and evenings, not quite enough time. 

There’s a pleasant breeze in the air and civilians are moving about peacefully. He allows himself to be lost in the atmosphere until he hears you mutter something. He looks down at you inquisitively with a small ‘hm?’ and you blink up. 

“Oh! It’s nothing!” You exclaim, waving your hands. “I was just wondering where Yanqing is.”

Yanqing. Your past self has never met him, he took in the boy not long ago and you’ve happily adopted him as your younger brother. The boy is usually at the training grounds with other Cloud Knights or at home studying (that’s what he tells him, but most likely he was distracted 80% of the time). Jing Yuan did ponder over whether to invite the boy, but decided that he could another time. Just like with you in the past, he brought Yanqing with him almost everywhere, but for today he just wanted to be alone with you.

“He said he would be at the training grounds mastering his sword strokes. Why?” Jing Yuan replied. He leans down closer until you can feel his breath ghost over your cheek. “Are you missing your little brother already?”

He pulls away as you jump in place and stumble back, slapping a hand on the afflicted cheek. He chuckles with an innocent expression at your fluster. 

“S-so? I’m just concerned for him! He’s usually with you and as his big sister, I have responsibilities, y-you know!” You sputter. “Don’t get close like that!”

The general quirks an eyebrow and your nervous sweating increases as his smile grows wider. ‘Oh no, what did I say…’

Like you anticipated, he walks closer, backing you up to the railings of the starskiff way. 

“What’s wrong with me being close, hm?” He teases, he’s hovering over you now and you lean further back to create more space between you. “Are you getting shy? Is this why you haven’t been giving me any hugs lately?”

Your head began to spin with how hot your face was getting. The truth was you’ve developed a bit of a crush for your superior. Your caretakers have always told you how attached you were to the general, and that hasn’t really changed until you read your past self’s journal. You wrote a lot about the general, like things he said or memories of older days (with exact journal entry numbers…). Sometimes you wrote descriptions of him with comments sprinkled in and it gave you a larger sense of familiarity beyond Jing Yuan just being your mentor. When you read an entry of a time Jing Yuan flirted (that word was nowhere to be found in the entry, but probably because your past self seemed to lack the recognition prowess for romance. You, who has read countless novels in your spare time, was well-acquainted) with your past self, you had to shut the book and almost threw it from your bed in second-hand embarrassment. 

That was not the only entry to have contained such contents. And for the entire time, your wise past incarnation assumed it was the general’s usual playfulness and your shared closeness. ‘Wise’! What ‘wise’?! How dense could a person possibly be! A man caresses your hair and says sweet words as the sun sets in front of you—how can it be anything but romantic! You had banged your head against your bed frame, going through multiple revelations at once, which alerted Jing Yuan who came into the room and asked ‘is something wrong?’ To which you quickly hid under the covers and shouted ‘nothing!’ as if that was less suspicious than just telling him you read something embarrassing from a novel. 

Anyways, you could never look at the general the same way again. How easy it was to make those memories your own, the way you wrote those entries were very personable. Again, if you were a writer in your past life, you would not be surprised! 

He leaned closely and gently ran his hand through some of my hair. The sun was beginning to set and our tea was cold from our lengthy conversation. It was cooling in the balcony of my flat but with Jing Yuan so close, I could not feel the chill. 

“And yet another day has passed,” he says, clearly referring to the increasing rosiness of the sky. He has not taken his eyes off me. “Many more are to come. But none of them will be as special as those I spend with you. You are more beautiful than any sunset or celestial phenomena.”

I watched curiously as he lifted the lock of hair to his nose and breathed in softly before kissing it. This made me laugh slightly and I waved him off. “Don’t hold me in such high regard, general. If I were to disappear, the rest of your days would become bleak.”

He looked at me seriously, gold irises glinting in the dying light. Somehow, it always manages to freeze me in place. Perhaps because I’m not used to that kind of emotion on him in moments like these. He took my hand and grips it tightly.

He said, “if you disappeared, the sun in my days would never rise again.”

He loved your past self. You don’t know if that sentiment was the same for your other incarnations, but he loved you deeply. When a young girl witnesses such tenderness and intimacy, even secondhand, how can she not develop feelings?! What made it even worse was the biting awareness that the both of you weren’t the same person. Maybe in body, but not in spirit. You seemed so different from her! And it was all because you didn’t start reading the journals early enough. A late bloomer, that’s what you were. Did he still love you the same way? 

“What’s on your mind?” Jing Yuan’s arms trapped you in between them, hands on the rails. “You’re staring so vacantly at me as if you’re thinking about something else.”

That snaps you from the tangled mess of hot wires of your mind. Immediately, you attempt to push him away, glancing nervously at passersby who are beginning to take notice.

“G-general… not here… people are looking…!”

He hums and leans closer, striking gold eyes mere inches away from yours, lips smiling mere fractions away from yours. His white hair falling over your face like a curtain. 

“This won’t do,” he whispers. “I can’t have your attention stolen away from me, can I?”

He takes a hand away from the rails to cup your head, tilting it stiffly so you’re angled to face him properly. ‘A kiss,’ you think dumbly. Was he really going to? Did you want him to? Your mind scrambled to sort the complexities of the situation. Technically, you were younger than him, incredibly so. And you were only fifteen! No matter how you looked at it, this was quite illegal wasn’t it?! You tried so hard to ignore this strange circumstance you found yourself in with the general. If only your past self was smarter about it! That stupid journal!

Just as you begin to feel dizzy and light-headed, Jing Yuan pulls away and pats your shoulder casually. “It’s quite rude for your mind to wander off while having a conversation, try to improve next time,” he says before continuing his stroll, leaving you flushed against the rails.

Upon processing his statement, your cheeks heat up further, no longer from embarrassment, but from anger. 

“As if you don’t do the same! General!” you shout, charging after him with the intent of giving him a good shove. 

Jing Yuan laughs as he accepts your shove, hardly affected. He’s seen enough to ascertain the future of his relationship with this new you—enough to grant him clear foresight. Now all he had to do was play his moves carefully.

In your office, you stare at the poem you were attempting earlier this afternoon. Remembering Jing Yuan turns you red, hastily you scribble down the last line before focusing on the rest of your work.

“Amidst the falling golden light of the Arbor Glowing roots spread across the ship Conflict blooming from its branches, the pale aurora flames.

Where gingko leaves fall and dance in the wind Blood and despair follows Halls of humanity, forgotten in the pride bred from our bones. 

Thus sings our short history Where legends live and never die In heart and in mind.”

[scotianostra]

On 21st July 1796 Robert Burns died in Dumfries, he was just 37.

Rather than go over Rabbie's life, this post mainly covers the last few weeks of his life, and him dealing with his iminent demise………

It is apparent from Burns’s correspondence, his poetry, and even from his First Commonplace Book that the bard was plagued by ill health on several occasions throughout his short life. ‘A Prayer in the Prospect of Death’, first published in the ‘Kilmarnock’ edition of Burns’s Poems, Chiefly in the Scottish Dialect is believed to have been written in 1784 when the bard was just twenty-five years of age and suffering a bout of ill health: O Thou unknown, Almighty Cause Of all my hope and fear! In whose dread presence, ere an hour, Perhaps I must appear!

Burns gives this poem the longer, more explanatory title, ‘A Prayer, when fainting fits, & other alarming symptoms of a Pleurisy or some other dangerous disorder, which indeed still threaten me, first put Nature on the alarm.’

Indeed, we might consider that the threat of illness never truly left the bard: there are several references throughout the poets’ correspondence to rheumatic episodes, hypochondria, physical injury, toothache and periods of ‘melancholy’. However, the first signs of the illness which would eventually claim Burns’s life began in the winter of 1795 when the poet was confined to his sick-bed for several weeks. His health declined over the course of the months that followed, and from the bard’s correspondence in the summer months of 1796 it would appear that he sensed the finality of this particular episode of ill health. In a letter to George Thomson on the 4th of July hewrote: ‘ I received your songs, but my health being so precarious nay dangerously situated, that as a last effort I am here at sea-bathing quarters. – Besides my inveterate rheumatism, my appetite is quite gone; & I am so emaciated as to be scarce able to support myself on my own legs.’ If you remember my last post about Burns at the beginning of the month where he sought the healing powers of the Brow Well and bathing in the Solway Firth near Ruthwell. Burns was soon aware that the sea-bathing was ineffective, writing to his father-in-law James Armour on the 10th of July that;

‘I have now been a week at salt water, & though I think I have got some good by it, yet I have some secret fears that this business will be dangerous if not fatal.’

Tragically, Burns’s final letters became increasingly desperate, and the poet expressed deep concern for the welfare of his family, it became clear the bard was preparing for the worst when he wrote to his brother Gilber:

God help my wife & children, if I am taken from their head! – They will be poor indeed. – I have contracted one or two serious debts, partly from my illness these many months, & partly from too much thoughtlessness as to expense when I came to town that will cut in too much on the little I leave them in your hands.’

Burns was right to be concerned. Indeed, he died in significant financial difficulty, overshadowed with the threat of debtors’ jail. Burns himself acknowledges this in a letter to his cousin, James Burness, on the 12th of July in which he states: ‘When you offered me money assistance, little did I think I should want it so soon. A rascal of a haberdasher, to whom I owe a considerable bill, taking it into his head that I am dying, has commenced a process against me, and will infallibly put my emaciated body into jail.’

Before this threat could be realised, Burns died surrounded by his family and close friends on this day in 1796.

While biographers and critics have offered several theories surrounding the cause of Burns’s death (many of which are fanciful and without evidence, some even hinting at conspiracy), scholars and medics who have examined the poet’s own account of his illness, together with those of his contemporaries, agree that the poet most likely died from bacterial endocarditis: a serious complication of his recurring rheumatic illness. Of course I dn’t think his like of alcohol helped though.

Robert Burns’s funeral took place at midday on the 25th of July 1796, I will cover it in more detail in a few days……

[toasterhasabucket]

Topic: MALEVOLENT PODCAST (PART 20)

TW : this whole thing is about !death and suicide! and very very much just me complaining and crying about the POEM TO HIS PARENTS

Starting off strong, Arthur's parents killed themselves when he was young. He wrote a poem about it, about his parents, about his grief and wanting it back, wanting comfort and boy, oh boy! I am SOBBING. I couldn't find a written copy of his poem so I just kept replaying it and writing it down in my notes app

This is the poem ( if I misspelled anything, don't tell me, just ignore it please)

"I don't recall how we met

as I was far too young

I knew you not as you are now

because to me you were the sun

and always present warmth and glow

a light that's always there

to wipe the teas from out my eyes

to brush my matted hair

and I would lie if not to say our relationship was pure.

I am young

a cause of grief of this I am quite sure

despite all this id be remiss to say there was no love

a calmness and a careful word

a nudge not a shove

there were nights I recall

I needed you the most

I'd crawl from bed and walk to you

and you would hold me close

between the love of both of you

to ail my sleeping strife

I never felt so safe

yet so cold

in all my life.

I too recall a time I was trying to impress

a goofy boy named Arthur dressed in his mother's best

was only dad who laughed with me

as mother you withdrew but

when he joined in dressing up

you cried in laughter too

and there was the time we all did find ourselves stuck in the rain

mother had her gown near soaked

and dad was much the same

and though we were miserable

mother found us a spot of dry

which we all ate a pretend meal

jelly and sea pie.

and now you're gone

and I can't explain the loss that lingers here

the size of a young boys parents

he wishes could be near

and there are nights

where he needs you

and he still crawls out of bed

and walks toward your bedroom door

before recalling you're dead.

and I want someone to tell that boy

to swallow all the hate

that nothing he could have said

would have changed his parents fate

and I want that someone to be you

as I write this

but alas

this pain will linger with me still

I pray this too shall pass."

Oh my God. That's emotional and so important to him I wonder if the people in the YouTube comments had anything to say about it?

NO THEY DIDN'T

One person said "glad we got to learn more about johns backstory" WHAT ABOUT HIS SOUL CRUSHING POEM

Sorry forgot some of your parents didn't kill themselves, my mistake, so so so sorry that you're crooked and evil and didn't sob your eyes out when he recited his poem. (I am completely normal and chill)

Another person said something like "Arthur, the boy who lived" and yk this could mean many things, maybe because he's survived many life threatening situations and actually escaped death, maybe it's because of the ending of the episode. OR it's because his parents are dead and if that's why

I am going to roll myself into a hole and throw UP.

There's nothing terribly wrong with the joke I'm just dramatic and a crybaby

I need to stop complaining so NOW I'm going to take in this poem like it should have been.

Let's point out my "highlights"

"because to me you were the sun" when you're young and have good parents you like them most the time, he was young when they died, he looked up to them still and saw them in such a bright and amazing way

"and now you're gone and I can't explain the loss that lingers here the size of a young boys parents he wishes could be near and there are nights where he needs you and he still crawls out of bed and walks toward your bedroom door before recalling you're dead"

This whole part has me in FUCKING SHAMBLES, IM SHAKING AND SOBBING, IM GOING TO BE THINKING ABOUT THIS ON MY DEATH BED.

"and I want someone to tell that boy to swallow all the hate. that nothing he could have said would have changed his parents fate"

God Arthur you just like to kick me right in the stomach don't you, this almost brought me to my knees I'm not even going, I almost went onto the floor. Put this into perspective, you're a kid who is around your parents ALL the time then one day they kill themselves, even as a kid survivors guilt is a thing, most the time survivors guilt is seen in like horror movies and shit but dude, when I found out my mom committed I thought smth like I wish I could have done something, it should have been me, even though I was ten I felt accountable for what happened because it feels like all the love you gave was never enough because in the end they left by choice. That will LINGER that will STAIN and it is forever, not matter how faint it seems at times it'll never really go away. So I know like first hand, a child who's parents killed themselves or even just have dead parents, all have thought at one time "why not me."

"nothing he could have said would have changed his parents fate"

I'll never get over this line, EVER.

Not only do I relate I FEEL this, this whole poem was like a slap in the face, hit after hit, I felt seen but in a way I didn't want to be. I felt like I was exposed and I don't think I've ever read anything that's made me feel so read to.

See this is the part where I explain that I am not complaining about people not caring about his poem and this very important part to him, it's more of me really complaining that I care and relate to much so it's overwhelming

I am not here to be like "you don't care about this like I do? Die" and if I sound like that I was joking or having a moment because I'm going off the rails with a crazy train (I love that song)

And obviously of course it's sad and everything but not everyone can relate and think about it from the way I do and I get that

Not everyone has experienced something like this and I'm glad!

But I guess since I related I was just so shocked and a little confused on why I didn't see anyone talk about it

Sure the poem isn't metaphorically fancy and is more blunt then most but it's gets the point across and I like that. I like that a lot

Anyways I'm going to draw Arthur angst, love you guys bye!

[doki-doki-lesbians-club]

hello! please rant about the comphet subtext in ddlc. i wanna hear it so bad please please please please please

Hi! I think I've written on this before, but I can't recall when or where, so I'll try and recall as many points as I can!

This'll be a long one, so under the cut!

For starters, let's talk base game. Obviously, all four girls fall for the MC and that's that. However, watching the ways that the other club members interact, it's pretty clear to many players that they have feelings beyond just friendship.

Namely, I sight Natsuki's poems. First off, the poem "Amy Likes Spiders" can be read as Yuri's love of horror (which is how I initially read it when I first played). However, it's also pretty easy to read this as either Natsuki's experience being trans, or being gay. Either way, that makes the entire narrative of the poem make sense, and also explains lines like "I tried not to let her touch me. She likes spiders, so her hands are probably gross." as well as "It doesn't matter if she has other hobbies. It doesn't matter if she keeps it private. It doesn't matter if it doesn't hurt anyone.

It's gross. She's gross. The world is better off without spider lovers."

Seems pretty clear, right? These lines may feel intense and out of place with other readings, but when you imagine Natsuki being outed to her shit friends as gay, or trans, it all starts to make sense.

Have you ever read the poem "I'll Be Your Beach"? Because it's gay as all hell!

We're led to assume that the romantic poems Natsuki and Yuri write are about the MC, but that would be odd to imagine when reading this poem. Natsuki writes about "your heavy thoughts", "your insecurities", and "your memories" and ends by saying "You'll learn to love yourself again." When, exactly, did the MC express any of these sentiments? Let alone to Natsuki?? But I think it would be pretty easy to connect all of these points to another girl: Yuri.

It's easy to see some strong subtext here for gay Natsuki (and maybe trans too, if you wanna see that). But when we break into the Side Stories, this is where it gets real interesting...

MC is not there. The Side Stories are purely scenes to read through to watch the Literature Club form for the first time as all the girls meet each other and get to know one another. Because of this, we get to see more of them and their feelings toward each other than we could have ever dreamed of in the base game!

Without giving too many spoilers for some of the best scenes in the entire game: the Side Stories are pretty gay. It's nearly impossible to ignore. These girls are clearly imagining each other as more than just friends, are going through some feelings. Each pairing even gets their own spotlight, and we see how each and every one of them has some interest in each other, which is a stark difference from the base game.

The main difference? MC is not there.

The base game has a lot of themes surrounding control, reality, and choices (or the lack thereof). Not only are all the girls destined (or "programmed") to fall in love with MC, it can't be avoided, even by Monika, who wasn't meant to have a route at all. They were already playing with the ideas of fate, and programming, and free will, but what happens when you remove the object that decided their fate?

Well, when we removed MC from the scenario altogether, we see the girls happier, getting along better, and showing interest in one another that we only got in subtext in the base game. To me, this leads to another theme of choice and control: compulsive heterosexuality. If part of the "generic dating sim" frame of their reality is forcing them to express interest in the male protagonist, even if they couldn't care less and really are interested in each other, that's the same themes but on a whole new level.

Left to their own devices, the girls are happy and expressing interest in one another. In the "game" they are forced to play roles in, we see their problems exacerbate, their situation spiraling, as they all desperately cling to the MC as the object of their affection. Seems pretty comphet to me.

Thank you sooo much for this ask! It's been a while since I wrote a long post like this! :D Speaking outside of my own trans/gay perspective, it seems pretty hard to imagine any other future for these girls in light of the Side Stories. And to that extent, I think the Side Stories gives us a window into a happier world; one where they are all free to grow and thrive as who they are, regardless of what that means for each of them! I think that's only further fueled this wonderful fandom: seeing them happy.

and gay.

Thanks again for the ask~!

[likeadevils]

I wonder how many of her songs or poems get the 'atw' treatment? Maybe she stopped mentioning it because people were so keen for the like 10 minute version of atw that we eventually got.

it depends what you mean by the atw treatment? i dont think taylor has taken three months to write and rewrite a song and ended up having to call someone in to cut half the verses. from what jack, aaron, and other recent collaborates have said about her process, she seems to write fairly quickly and intentionally. she knows what she wants out of a song, and the songs come together fairly quickly.

taylor’s talked a few times about how she doesn’t take large breaks from writing anymore, she just always working so she never has to get back in the zone, and from what the people around her have said, it shows. atw, on the other hand, came after a long period of writers block. on that front, the closest song we know of is gorgeous, which we have footage of her writing! and she does seem to struggle with it— it takes over two weeks, and she clearly has a lot of competing ideas in her head. but even then, it’s less that she’s writing whole verses, and more that she’s tossing out and discarding lines (we do know lwymmd had a full chorus that they cut, though, which i am desperate to hear).

like, needing to cut 5 minutes of a song is something most artists avoid, and will build structures to keep them from doing it— taylor specifically seems to have built structures to keep herself from doing something like that again. she’s also just become more comfortable trusting her artistic impulses— experimenting with song structure, using flowery languages, portraying more complicated situations. i think if she ends up with a ten minute song on her hands and she’s not sure what parts to cut, she’s gonna leave more of those parts in. so while i’m sure taylor cuts things in her songs, i think cutting multiple major sections after they’ve been written is so rare that it might be a once in a career thing.

BUT i guess we’ll never get closure unless taylor does long interviews and maybe even a documentary about her song writing process… wouldn’t that be so devastating for me finding out i was wrong… i would hate for that to happen… taylor totally shouldn’t do that that would be so bad of her

[writerscafehub]

𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐀: 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐞

@fluffyprettykitty

From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!)

I would give it a solid three, I think I write simplistic and descriptive enough to give a good story out there. 

What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

I think the length? I have lots of people compliment me on my ability to write a conclusive drabble and short shorties and poems have always been my favorite to read.

Are there any writers that inspire you?

On Tumblr, I have been inspired by the first people who introduced me to fandom and taught me how to use my writing abilities. Some have deactivated by now but my most prominent writing inspiration is @outerspacious. 

What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

Oh, it has to be my Layla story. Together. In a way, the story describes everything I have ever hoped for regarding a f/f relationship, like the dream of living with your loved one somewhere where you can only acknowledge your love in specific places.

Which character(s) do you find easiest to write and which do you find most difficult to write?

Oh, it’s so easy for me to write for Sam Wilson of course, and Frank Castle, Matt Murdock, Selina Kyle, and Brunnhilde. The most difficult is Gamora unfortunately, I would love to write more about her but I feel like I don’t have enough material to grasp on.

Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

Love of course, first loves, falling in love, falling out of love, & a healthy dose of some toxic relationships.

Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about!

Very Excited about this toxic love kind of story I’ve been brewing in my head for a while now. Something about equally drawing energy over each other without ever acknowledging they are the one you need/want more.

First fandom you ever wrote for?

Beyblade! A thousand years ago when I was a teen <3

Any guilty pleasure trope(s)?

Once again I love writing about toxic relationships using people and completely draining someone out of their emotions. Maybe to get over past experiences cause it’s fun to explore “forbidden” feelings but it’s a fun process to write from that perspective. 

A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

Hmmm, I never liked the soulmate trope I guess. 

What is the wildest fic you’ve ever written?

Okay not here, but back in the Beyblade fandom I sued to write/keep the diary of one of the players and it was full of wild shenanigans and insane things that happened to him every day and it was just completely unhinged. 

Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)

Any character I fancy x me is and will always be my favorite pairing cause I write for me <3

Do you listen to anything while you write?

I try to! I got some specific playlists for some characters such as Bruce Tony or Matt and then I got others I searched for based on vibes for the story I wanted.

One-shots or multi-chaptered works?

One shot. 

Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

I have! I had this whole thing in my head when I wrote ‘Party Tricks’ to sort of have the reader experience each one of the Avengers I guess in different situations and a couple of other ideas that have been lost in the void that is my brain.

15. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

Ugh so many. I have some stories I have experienced that I want to turn into fics but I’m too shy to do it, unfortunately.

17. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received?

Whenever I write about Bruce Banner I get the best compliments from some lovely people who you know just get *it* get the obsession. 

Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

I always try to push my comfort zone a little, the things I enjoy are limited so I always try to think in a way of the audience, of the other side, just look at anything a little more round rather than straightforward. It’s something I’d encourage anyone to do sincerely.

Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?

Oh, fluff for sure. For me, angst is only for that one day a month when you need to feel everything, fluff is my daily dose of happiness.

Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!

I don’t have OCs but I would love to venture into that at some point in my life.

If you could enter the universe of any one of your fics, which would it be and why?

Honestly, any fic, all are unique in a way and I just wanna get an in you know. But mostly I’d love to enter any kind of vamp au I’ve made, I feel like I’d get to know such a new and interesting kind of life.

Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process?

I need to write the main thing in under one hour typing fast, no distractions, just pure focus. I guess learning what someone’s writing style is like teaches you a lot about that person and the sort of the fic they choose to write. But mostly I need to have the idea so vividly inside my head before I even attempt to write it, I can’t write a sentence per day, it needs to be at least 600 words.

Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

From Human Connection

He was yours yet not at all at the same time.

Until one dark rainy night, he held your throat within the palm of his hand staring down at you asking you what you wanted from him. 

And you didn’t reply. And your heartbeat rose and rose. 

But he knew what to do to make you talk. 

And when he crushed his body against yours, you knew. 

You knew how people connected. 

And within the time you’d explain to him who you were and what happened to you and he would swear on his life that no harm would ever be done to you again. 

And then you became one of these people you used to so closely inspect. 

Then you became his.’

Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

You need to try to write about everything you dream of, no matter whether you’re going publish it or not or show it to a friend, I think many people can write and just are afraid to do so. Fandom and Tumblr give you such an opportunity to explore yourself and your talents through something so simple as dreaming about a character and writing about any situation. I wish more people weren’t afraid although the lack of acknowledgment from the audience is draining, finding friends and good people in fandom is a possibility, and joining incredibly well-mannered servers helps you even more! 

[foxes-that-run]

Getaway Car

The song is about Taylor using an affair to get away from a bad relationship. Before Midnight's High Infidelity dated the events as prior to the 2016 Met Gala and before the 1989 TV Vault had lyrical similarities it was widely accepted as about the PR relationship with Tom Hiddleston. Poor Tom was rather surprised, considering they dated for a few weeks, it was after Taylor and Calvin split up and more than a year before Reputation came out. (BTW this is a 1971 Jaguar e-type, a classic British sports car, Harry the same car in red)

Getaway Car is written to the muse who Taylor had an affair with, someone who is surprised and she is sorry for hurting. For context, her relationship with Calvin and his behaviour can safely be called problematic (x, x, x, x, x, x and x). CH really 'Got out some popcorn / As soon as her rep starting going down, down, down'. Her mental state:

Getaway Car is a pithy and fun but honest about poor choices. Although a year later it's closer to 29 April, 2016, with more hindsight Taylor was warmer towards to the 'other man' in High Infidelity on Midnights:

Do you really want to know where I was April 29th? Do I really have to chart the constellations in his eyes? [and] Do I really have to tell you how he brought me back to life?

Taylor also describes Reputation as a love story, many songs on which are about Harry, as are those on Lover which also express regret. I think the alleged affair would have been motivated from getting out of a situation which was not good for Taylor, however as we know from Harry's Debut it really hurt him. Lover and Folklore express a lot of regret, and I think they have both moved on.

Making of Video

Jack's shirt about publicity (also worn in This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things making of)

Taylor saying "Like a Dylany kinda thing", hmm...

wearing the evil eye and angel rings

And Taylor's longer, curly, darker coloured hair. To me, this looks like her hair in May and June 2017. Getaway Car was (at least in part) written and recorded in 2017. I think this adds to a song with more storytelling that diary writing, I think Taylor was quite affected by trying to get out of the relationship with Calvin, one she's sung about little and never warmly.

You can read Jack's comments about the video. It's interesting Jack commented on why it was being recorded, it seems Taylor did that a lot in the Rep era, and TBH it seems good practice to prevent any copyright claims, she also talks to the camera to note the lyric.

Live Performances

Getaway car was the first song in the Reputation Encore, it followed the Why She Disappeared poem. The tour visuals were reminiscent of I Knew You Were Trouble, the Reputation stage is an X and shot to showcase that here. The motel is called "Last time motel" which is reminiscent of The Last Time. It ends on Taylor getting into a black vintage convertible reminiscent of Blank Space.

It was an Era's surprise song 27 May 2023, Jack Antonoff joined Taylor on stage and added a nice sarcastic "oh yeah, we're both sorry." The last time Taylor was seen with MH was the 18th May, the break up was reported 5 June 2023.

Lyrics

No, nothin' good starts in a getaway car It was the best of times, the worst of crimes I struck a match and blew your mind But I didn't mean it, and you didn't see it

'It was the best of times, the worst of crimes' is a reference to Charles Dickens A Tale of Two Cities. The cities being Paris and London. This quote is in a passage that describes Taylors 2016 quite well: “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, [...] it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair” It reminds me of "This Summer is the Apocalypse".

'Worst of Crimes' is similar to Where do broken hearts go "All the rest of my crimes don't come close"

"Struck match and blew your mind" is similar to "Strike a match, then you blow it out" in Say don't go. and Right Where You Left Me: "Matches burn after the other"

The ties were black, the lies were white In shades of gray in candlelight I wanted to leave him, I needed a reason

"Ties were black, likes were white" appears to point to the Met Gala, and I do think that is the intention of the line (and relationship) Taylor also was at the Black-tie Vanity Fair Oscar Party in LA on 28 February 2016, the day Harry tweeted (in LA) an Elvis Stuck on You Lyric "You can shake an apple off an apple tree." Harry was not at the Vanity Fair party, however he also has leaks from this era that refer to picking his muse up and driving them home. I did something bad and Sweet Creature have more on that time.

The shades were grey is similar to 50 Shades of Grey, which Taylor wrote I don't wanna live forever for about Harry. Candles are also in New Years Day "Candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor" and Hunger "Candles burnt down to the floor"

"X" marks the spot where we fell apart He poisoned the well, I was lyin' to myself I knew it from the first Old Fashioned, we were cursed We never had a shotgun shot in the dark (oh!)

'X Marks the Spot where we fell apart' is line from Hilary Duff Breathe in. Breathe Out which Taylor said she liked in an Tumblr post 25 June 2015 and used the melody of in Paper Rings and title in Labyrinth. It's a song and line that is sad about the relationship not working out with someone untruthful. In the 2015 timeline the timing of this post is a little interesting.

'Poisoning the well' is meaning Calvin ruined the chance of this affair by discrediting or ridiculing it, with the diss track Ole.

An Old Fashioned is whiskey, also in Gorgeous "Whiskey on Ice, Sunset and Vine, you’ve ruined my life by not being mine"

Never had a shotgun shot in the dark is similar to Say Don't Go: "I've known it from the very start / We're a shot in the darkest dark"

You were drivin' the getaway car We were flyin', but we'd never get far

Driving is a Haylor theme.

Flying is a Haylor theme.

Don't pretend it's such a mystery Think about the place where you first met me Ridin' in a getaway car There were sirens in the beat of your heart Should've known I'd be the first to leave Think about the place where you first met me In a getaway car, oh-oh-oh No, they never get far, oh-oh-ah No, nothin' good starts in a getaway car

The line "think about the place where you first met me" is also often referred to in reference to Taylor meeting Tom Hiddleston at the Met, which again I think is with intention. Though there is not a particular reason to think someone at the Met Gala would do this.

It's also generally assumed Harry and Taylor met at the Kids Choice Awards in 2012, however neither has confirmed this, and it is simply the first time they were seen together by fans. As 2011 timeline outlines it seems Harry and Taylor were already connected then. These lyrics indicates their first meeting was brief (Holy Ground), she was not over Jake (Begin Again) and she was not looking for love (Suburban Legend):

Holy Ground - Back to a first glance feeling on New York time

Begin Again - Took a deep breath in the mirror / He didn't like it when I wore high heels / But I do

Suburban Legends - I didn't come here to make friends / We were born to be suburban legends

It was the great escape, the prison break The light of freedom on my face But you weren't thinkin' and I was just drinkin' While he was runnin' after us, I was screamin', "Go, go, go!" But with three of us, honey, it's a sideshow And a circus ain't a love story, and now we're both sorry (we're both sorry)

..Ready for it? "And he can be my jailer, Burton to this Taylor" and in Afterglow "Put you in jail for something you didn't do"

The only other Circus Lyric is Mirrorball: And they called of the circus, burned the disco down, but they use visuals (below)

CH and TS were over by the Met Gala with the official Break up announced 1 June, 2016, Taylor wasn't even seen with TH till the 14th June, 2016 - there was no running after and the Circus was Taylor and Tom's PR relationship.

However Calvin, Harry and Taylor, was a public sideshow:

That started in 2015 with the BBMA's in May 2015

Calvin's Twitter fight with One Direction on Twitter in August 2015

Writing Ole in February 2016

Taylor and CH starting a public fight over This is What you Came for in July 2016.

Harry and Taylor have used circus imagery the Red Tour, which the hat for is also in the End Game Video and Harry's Daylight video is (french) Circus Themed and there is a carnival in the Willow MV.

"X" marks the spot where we fell apart He poisoned the well, every man for himself I knew it from the first Old Fashioned, we were cursed It hit you like a shotgun shot to the heart (oh!)

This second chorus changes shot in the dark to shot in the heart. :(

We were jet-set, Bonnie and Clyde (oh-oh) Until I switched to the other side, to the other side It's no surprise I turned you in (oh-oh) 'Cause us traitors never win I'm in a getaway car I left you in a motel bar Put the money in a bag and I stole the keys That was the last time you ever saw me (oh!)

In Ready for it Taylor likened her and her muse to 'Burton and Taylor', here she's used another famous couple 'Bonnie and Clyde' Taylor and Harry have used outlaw metaphors (list below).

'Switched to the other side', is going back to the other person in the three person sideshow. I think this is going to the Bahamas with Calvin only 2 weeks after the VF Oscar party/apple tweet.

Is it over now? "You dream of my mouth before it called you a lying traitor"

Cruel Summer "Hang your head low In the glow of the vending machine"

...... FTDT "Woke up alone in this hotel room"

Outlaw Metaphors:

Stand up (1D) - I won't be leavin' till I've finished stealin' / Every piece of your heart' and 'I'm a thief, I'm a thief (Call me a thief) / I'm a thief, I'm a thief (But you should know your part) / I'm a thief, I'm a thief (I'm only here) / I'm a thief, I'm a thief ('Cause you stole my heart)

Stockholm Syndrome (HS) - Who's that shadow holding me hostage?

Ready for it (TS) - Knew I was a robber first time that he saw me / Stealing hearts and running off and never saying sorry / But if I'm a thief, then he can join the heist

Cowboy like me (TS) I've got some tricks up my sleeve / Takes one to know one You're a cowboy like me

MMIH (HS) - I walked the streets all day / Running with the thieves

Daylight (TS) - Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down

I was ridin' in a getaway car I was cryin' in a getaway car I was dyin' in a getaway car Said goodbye in a getaway car Ridin' in a getaway car I was cryin' in a getaway car I was dyin' in a getaway car Said goodbye in a getaway car

This outtro is similar to lyrics on Lover, so much @cntfightmydemonsthyknowhowtoswim and I wonder if parts of Lover and Reputation are the same events.

Cruel Summer: I'm not dying / You say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times / We're not trying

Cruel Summer: I'm drunk in the back of the car and I cried like a baby coming home from the bar (oh), and

Death By A Thousand Cuts: Saying “Goodbye” is death by a thousand cuts

[theycallmebun]

people of the same passion

asahi azumane x gn!reader

w/c: 716

genre: fluff(meetcute)

warnings: none!

summary: y/n and asahi learn more about each other at the local cafe!

a/n: i think this might be a pt1 

you don’t know how the two of you haven’t met sooner. i mean, for so long, you were right in front of each other. literally, sitting at tables across from each other at your local cafe. both having claimed seats to sit in every friday and saturday evening. you don’t know if asahi– you learned that was his name when the barista called him up for his drink– frequented the cafe more than you, though. 

of course you noticed him whenever you were there, how couldn’t you? that brown hair tied back loosely, revealing his chiseled jaw and muscular neck– you’re getting carried away. he was nice to look at but you never worked it up to introduce yourself and get to know him. and, you had other things to do anyway.

the creativity that buzzes through your head needs to be written. so many beautiful thoughts and ideas turned into lovely little stories and poems for you to reread on a bad day. turning your thoughts into interpretive art is your favorite activity. you often catch yourself daydreaming about anyone and anything, transforming that into some crazy tale blown way out of proportion. 

you never approached asahi because, by the looks of it, he had other things do, too. whenever you glanced at him, he’d have his bulky headphones on, writing something down on a pad while bopping his head. 

the both of you were just so busy, caught up in your own worlds. 

until one faithful day, the new barista at the cafe, bless her soul, calls out, “jasmine tea, hot,” and leaves it on the counter. 

you thought it was weird that she didn’t call out a name like how they normally do, but you stand up to get your drink. asahi stands up, too. you don’t question it, though, what if he just needs some napkins or something? it’s awkward when the two of you fall in step together and it’s even more awkward when you both grab the drink simultaneously. then, in turn, flinching away from the drink simultaneously. 

“sorry, we must’ve ordered the same thing. go ahead and take that one, i’ll wait for the next one,” you take charge of the situation. 

“oh, i was about to insist on you taking this one. i don’t mind waiting,” he responds politely. for how large he is, he’s pretty timid. 

you laugh softly, he’s cute, you think.

before you can say anything, the new hire goes, “jasmine tea, hot,” again. 

you grab the cooler one, hoping asahi appreciates the fact that you gave him the hotter and fresher tea. 

before you walk away, asahi says, “would you like to sit with me? i understand if you can’t, you look pretty busy sometimes.”

“i would love to!” you gleam at his offer. 

you introduce yourself on the short walk back to his table, and he does the same. when you’re seated, you ask about the cafe. 

“so what do you like to get done when you’re here?”

“i like to write lyrics for some songs i’ve been working on. when i come in, i normally have the music all done but i just need the words to add,” he answers. “what about yourself?”

“i like to write some stories and poems. nothing too serious, just a creative and emotional outlet for myself, you know?” you reply. 

“oh, that’s crazy. we’re like basically doing the same thing,” asahi points out. 

you both laugh because it’s true. 

“we’re people of the same passion,” you say. “that’s actually really good, let me write that down.”

asahi thinks you’re cute, too. 

you grab your laptop from your table and quickly open your notes. 

“sorry, i just have to write my ideas down as soon as possible, or else i’ll forget,” you excuse your abruptness. 

“don’t worry about it. i’ve got some ideas of my own that i need to write down, too.” 

and just like that, you and asahi fall into a productive silence while you write your racing thoughts down. 

“we should do this again,” you bring up. “it was really nice doing that with someone else around.”

“yeah, i couldn’t agree more. i think that was one of my best writing sessions,” asahi confesses. 

“i’m glad. i’ll see you around then?”

“absolutely,” he says. 

[12thhouse-sun]

Writing Interview Tag Game!

Thanks for the tag @pouroverpaloma!

When did you start writing?

I’ve always been a highly creative person, visual art my usual and longest-standing vice, but writing I’ve always been interested in. At 15 years old I tried to write a book (didn’t finish it). I forget what the word count was but it was a high fantasy Percy Jackson-esque. I tried working on the worldbuilding for a book in college and afterwards but nothing concretely got…written. Not plot just worldbuilding lmao. That project has since turned into my D&D homebrew world that I have yet to subject to any players. 

I’ve done some short creative writing here and there, a spoken word-style poem a few years ago and I took part in Escapril 2020. Otherwise, I have not been writing creatively in quite some time. I majored in engineering in college so there weren’t a lot of opportunities for me to stretch those creative muscles. The writing I’ve done for my GalexTav fics are my first big dive into writing since high school. 

I would journal as a therapeutic device but I’m only ever to keep up with it when I’m in crisis as it’s very effective at emptying my brain but it’s not necessarily good writing, it’s often train of thought and very emotional.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

I read mainly fantasy and I write fantasy so there isn’t a lot of difference there. Maybe when I start branching out with my writing I’ll have an actual answer but for now, no!

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

I haven’t had anyone compare my work but there’s lots of little things I see in the fic authors I read that I certainly feel strongly about but have yet to attempt to emulate. I want to be funny like goldenhearts (@yourworsttotebag). I want to go to poetry land like i88 (ao3). I wish I could figure out how to write 10K plus chapters every chapter like @linnetagain. I see so many little things in everything that I read that makes me want to try and be better.

I’m also still trying to figure out my own style. It’s been so long since I’ve tried to write anything longform that I am still exploring what my voice even sounds like. Even the first few chapters for you’re at the top of my lungs I wrote just a few months ago I cringe at when I read now. I’m in a high growth stage at the moment and I feel like I haven’t really settled into anything yet. But I’m in the midst of it and maybe if any of you who’ve read my fics notice anything please tell me lol I would appreciate the insight.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I have a few lmao. So I’m currently at work (if you’re my bosses, this is a joke I’m not at work rn) where I have two screens and as of today a fancy new click clack keyboard. Job-provided desk chair that’s okay and surrounded by work-related things. 

My office at home is much cozier. I have a blanket on my lap and around my shoulders, at least two drinks within arm’s reach (usually a water and an Olipop) and a fresh bag of Nutella biscuits waiting to be devoured. I also have a click clack keyboard there and I’ll put on my big gaming headphones to blast music as I write. 

I don’t like writing on my phone. If I do, it’s to quickly get down a rough idea while it’s still in my head but I can't do it for a long period of time as typing longform on my phone like that stresses me out. (Those who write entire fics in their notes app, I salute you.)

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Reading other fics! Anything that gets me thinking of new ways to put the pookies into new situations. Great example is @yourworsttotebag (goldenhearts on AO3) just started posting a Parallel Universe fic where the Gales from two different universes get swapped. It got me thinking of how that would work with Gale and my Tav, and how that would go if my Tav was the one who got swapped. I’m not going to write this fic, but it’s fun to think about! It gets me thinking outside of my usual settings and it helps me think of situations and conversations that might end up applying to what I’m actually writing. 

I'm also constantly listening to music and while I'm horrible at being able to hear lyrics and therefore have a hard time linking song meaning to a scene or plot point, the flow and energy of a song can give me ideas just by themselves.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

I don’t think I’ve written enough variety to have developed anything. I actually went back and skimmed through my writing, posted or otherwise, with this lens to try and identify anything but other than the usual stuff you’d expect out of a Galefic I’ve got nothing.

What is your reason for writing?

Brain got too full of my Tav and Gale and I needed to drain it lmao. Now it’s just a constant flood. I’m also just enjoying it! I mention earlier that I’m usually a visual artist but the art block and imposter syndrome has been very bad. Writing fic has been freeing and has allowed me to create freely without judgment. (Or, well, the minimum amount of judgment required to even post something lmao).

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

Any, really. But especially if a commenter calls something out in a chapter they particularly enjoyed or related to that really gets me going. I’ll scream at any comment someone leaves even if it’s a “chapter kudos” or whatever. Seeing Hit # going up is gratifying in that I know that people are here and reading it but a comment really solidifies that a real person is here and enjoying it. Never be too scared to leave a comment. If I feel anything in any fic I read I try to comment because I know how much it makes my day as an author so I try to be that person for authors as well. 

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

I hope they’re enjoying what I’m reading! I hope that the readers that are subscribed to me and my fics get just as excited when they see an AO3 email about one of my fics come through like it does when my faves update. That’s the dream.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I like my action and combat scenes, but I rarely write them. I have posted one I think and I have one in a WIP that won’t be posted until the whole thing’s done. But that unposted WIP chapter and then Chapter 4 of you’re at the top of my lungs are some of my favorite things I’ve written.

A lot of these questions have made me realize how little feedback I get as a writer and maybe I need to find a writing group or something. 

How do you feel about your own writing?

I honestly feel like it’s awkward and stilted. I find I have to try hard to make it all flow. I think that’s the years of having to write engineering reports coming through, being straight and to the point and all that. I usually feel like my writing is good and I am able to get across whatever point I’m trying to make but I would love to be more flowery and go to poetry land more often. I want to get across big feelings and big ideas and have it feel visceral and not like I’m just throwing words on a page.

Tagging @waterdeep-weavemoss, @dr-demi-bee, and @crimson-and-lavender

[taylortruther]

Yk with the added context of the Matty-Taylor relationship timeline, I was compelled to go back and reconsider certain songs from her discography and see them differently. Obviously we have The 1, Cardigan, Question..?, Glitch etc but what about the 1989 vault?

I have a strong belief that Taylor re-touches, if not fully edits the vault tracks before the album releases (as evidenced by the punchline lyric on ATW10MV).

Ofc, we don't know for sure, but in Now That We Don't Talk there's that line about the muse "growing his hair long" and Harry hadn't done that till late 2014 (atleast to a noticeable extent) so I felt that maybe that song was written later on.

Anyways, listening to TTPD got me thinking some thoughts. Like Taylor is very deliberate with her word usage on the songs. In Down Bad, the lyric "How dare you say that it's..." is supposed to be auto-filled with the word "over". This instantly made me think of Is It Over Now?

Was "Slut!" about Matty too? I mean if the rumours of a 1975 feature on that song were true, then obviously it has a connection to them? Also, I've always felt it was weird to have that song be about Harry for so many reasons, but whatever.

I mean ofc there's glaring references to Harry on the album, but by now we know that Taylor likes to merge her muses for a single song. She even liked a Tumblr post back in 2015 that related STYLE of all songs to Matty. Not a joke. Twitter recently rediscovered it and went nuts over it.

I feel like many songs we attributed to Harry over the years was just about Matty. I mean it always bothered me how much Taylor seemed to be affected by a 2 month situationship with an 18 year old all the way back in 2012. I mean she never brought up Kennedy or Lautner or Tom like she did with Harry in her later works....now we know that it was most likely Matty.

One part of me believes that So It Goes was also bout him. I mean "you did a number on me" means to mess someone up in a bad way, and I have no idea why she would put that lyric in there otherwise.

Also Ivy and Illicit Affairs were widely regarded to be about the Calvin-Tom-Joe situation...but in retrospect they might've been about Matty. These might sound like mindless rumours to most, but keep in mind that Guilty As Sin and Fresh Out The Slammer exist. Both Ivy and Illicit Affairs were fictional songs, but they expressed her inner feelings (swirled you into all my poems). Again, just theorizing here.

i guess he could be ~swirled~ into a few songs from 1989 tv (anything is possible! we didn't know the full story until the red vault! disclaimer!), but mostly i think what you are picking up on is that... taylor has a pattern in her relationships. and she has stories she tells herself about relationships, or herself, just like we all do, which create songs that share many themes.

like, obviously i don't know taylor, and i could be wrong about anything i write about her lyrics. but while ivy could be about matty (anything is possible!), i think it makes more sense that she has, on a few different occasions, left a dying relationships only after another person she liked came into her orbit. and this isn't even uncommon. lots of people only leave relationships when they have someone in the wings, or they've met someone who makes them realize the grass might be greener.

[literaturewithliz]

KOTLC CHARACTERS AS AUTHORS (human AU)

Sophie is a fiction author. I feel like she was that kid who read to escape real life, so now she’s providing that escapism. She wrote a couple standalone books in the beginning of her career, but those never got much of a response. Then she wrote a six book long series that got more popular with each release. She’s won multiple awards for that series and has gotten multiple offers to get it adapted to the big screen but she’s terrified it’ll turn out like it did for Rick Riordan the first time he tried that.

Keefe writes romance. Idk why, I just get the vibe from him. Anyways, think The Fault in Our Stars or The Hating Game. He’s extremely popular in the reading community, and you know who he is even if you’ve never read one of his books. He’s the author that makes you cry at 3 AM.

Fitz writes realistic fiction. Like, the realistic fiction that targets middle grade. There is not one school library in the UK that doesn’t have at least two books he’s written. I feel like he sets up a lot of meet and greets around the UK and US because his favorite part of his career is meeting the kids he’s inspired. He didn’t go to college for creative writing. He went to med school and got a doctorate because Alden said he wanted Fitz to become a successful doctor. Shortly after actually being a doctor, he realized how much he hated it and started writing during the night to escape his life.

Biana writes books about fashion. I feel like she’s a fashion designer and her social media blew up with a bunch of questions from followers, so she decided to write a couple of books explaining all of her personal techniques and skills she’s learned at college. People who create dresses and outfits for celebrities have read at least ONE of her books.

Tam is a poet. He’s written so many award winning poems that you’ve probably read a poem of his without realizing it. He writes depressing poems, mostly. Think Emily Dickinson. Every once in a while he’ll write really happy poems inspired by his sister or lover. He’s the poet who wrote the poem your middle school teacher had your class do an analysis on and you actually understood what he was talking about.

Linh writes mental health books. She’s gotten her PhD in psychology and feels bad that she can’t reach everyone with mental health issues, so she tries her best by writing a book. Eventually, that goes viral and she’s written a couple more books about mental health. I feel like she eventually got the courage to write about her and Tam’s childhood and the mental abuse her parents subjected her and Tam to. That helps a bunch of kids in their situation keep going.

Dex writes dystopian fiction. Think The Hunger Games or Matched. Really well-thought out plots that make you question your government system. He’s gotten a lot of his books adapted to movies and has made a lot of money off of his work. However, he also has a job being a hacker for the FBI, so there’s that. He’s really stressed but can’t make himself stop doing either of the jobs because he loves what he does.

Part 2?

[liberty-or-death]

"The numerous gods of the Mount Jiuyi have arrived, they arrive as plentiful as the clouds as they greet Lady Xiang. " "SHL Episode 9 - Qu Yuan's Cu Ci Nine Song九歌 Series Lady Xiang 湘夫人"

I deliberated for a long time as to whether I’d translate this poem.  But this likely where Gu Xiang got her name from so I just had to do it.  I thought this would be a simple poem but it took me more than a month to do it lol. XD

When native cn speakers come across a lady with the name Xiang 湘, it immediately brings to mind the two Xiang River Goddesses.  They were said to be the concubine of the legendary Emperor Shun.  “Lady Xiang 湘夫人” is a Pre Qin poem that’s written as part of Qu Yuan's Chu Ci Jiu Ge/Nine Song series, and it’s also known as the sister poem to “Xiang Jun 湘君”.

There are many interpretations as to who the focus of the story is.  But for the sake of this translation, I’ll be working on the assumption that the poem is about Lady Xiang missing her husband (Emperor Shun).  The poem’s really long and only the last part’s quoted in SHL, so feel free to skip to the end of the translation.  

This poem's known its vibrant descriptions and there's a bunch of reference to specific plants which I've linked. If you ever intend to write a fic in the Chu dynasty, or a fic centered around the 700-200BC, you could use this as a visual reference. (yas my nerdy friends, historical accuracy is sexy)

帝子降兮北渚，目眇眇兮愁予。

Lady Xiang has arrived at the Northern Island, my gaze is filled with sadness and worry. 

北渚: This was likely referring to  君山岛 Junshan Island. There's a lot of historical sites if you ever want to go there!

袅袅兮秋风，洞庭波兮木叶下。

The autumn wind blows gently endlessly; the Dongting lake ripples, the leaves fall.

登白薠兮骋望，与佳期兮夕张。

Standing amidst the reeds as I gaze into the distance, anticipating the date with the lover tonight.  

鸟何萃兮蘋中，罾何为兮木上？

Why do the birds gather amongst the reeds? Why are the fishnets on the tops of the trees?

This line implies that the birds should be in the trees, and the fishnets among the aquatic reeds.  But yet the situation’s the reverse.  (Ie. what should have happened has t happened.). It describes the author’s uneasy feelings.  

T/N: Just in case anyone’s as nerdy as me, this is likely a mirror of the line “采薜荔兮水中，搴芙蓉兮木末 I want to pick the scallops in the water, and to pluck the lotus from the trees” in sister poem in the same series, 湘君 Xiang Jun.

And look, more pictures of plants! (yes it's a different reed xD)

沅有芷兮澧有兰，思公子兮未敢言。

Th flower from the ginseng plant in the River Yuan, and orchids in the Lishui River.  I can’t describe how much I miss you, Young Master (Gongzi). 

T/N: Interestingly, 公子 Gongzi (aka Young Master) could be used on both male and female in the past.  This is a very interesting point because there’s actually a huge debate as to who’s the poem is referring to.  Baidu has interpreted this to mean Miss Xiang (ie. the goddess), but on the contrary, one physical book (yes I take this seriously lmao) I’ve bought thinks this is referring to Xiang Jun (the subject in her sister poem, and possibly her husband), and another physical book refrains from nailing the subject down.  So who knows LOL.

And just how gorgeous is the ginseng flower!

荒忽兮远望，观流水兮潺湲。

My emotions are unsettled, I gaze towards the distance with uncertainty.  However, the River Yuan and Lishui flows slowly.

麋何食兮庭中？蛟何为兮水裔？

Why does the deer seek food in the courtyard?  Why do the dragon (jiaolong) trapped on the river bank?

T/N: 麋: This term actually refers to the deer, but it has been described as “antlers like a deer, tail of a donkey, hooves of a cow, face of a horse” in ancient times, so it’s sometimes regarded as the mythological creature 四不像 (Si Buxiang/Four not alike).  It has made an appearance in some anime, and in one particular danmei fandom’s discourse. LOL

The mythological version is supposed to look like this. XD

蛟: Jialong refers to the “scaled dragon” in chinese mythology. If you’ve been watching Till the End of the Moon, Mingye was a jialong whom cultivated and became an immortal.

朝驰余马兮江皋，夕济兮西澨。

When morning comes, I ride my horse and race down the river bank.  I cross over to the western bank at night. 

闻佳人兮召予，将腾驾兮偕逝。

I hear my lover summons me.   So I speed towards hastily and we head off together. 

筑室兮水中，葺之兮荷盖。

We build our house in the water, and cover our roof with lotus leaves.

荪壁兮紫坛，播芳椒兮成堂。

The walls are decorated with moss, and purple shells pave the floor.   The fragrant pepper and dirt we mould form the family’s prayer hall.

T/N: 芳椒 - This was a specific type of fragrant pepper.  This was mixed with mud and painted on the walls, as the ancient people enjoyed its aroma. The moss refers to this specifically!

桂栋兮兰橑，辛夷楣兮药房。

The wood of the Gui tree form the beams, the Magnolia forms the rafters.  The crossbeams of the door are made from wood of the Xinyi tree, the white ginseng flowers decorates the medicinal room.

T/N: 辛夷 - The Xinyi tree is also part of the magnolia family. There's clearly a theme going on!

The Gui tree's so pretty! And the white magnolias!

And the Xinyi tree

罔薜荔兮为帷，擗蕙櫋兮既张。

The climbing fig is woven into a curtains, and the partitions made of flowers have been drawn.

T/N: 薜荔: Baidu says it’s the climbing fig, but my physical book thinks it’s the another magnolia plant. And the 蕙 flower was known for its fragrance.

Baidu's interpretation!

And my book's interpretation XD

And look, the pretty 蕙 flower!

白玉兮为镇，疏石兰兮为芳。

The weights  are made of snowy white jade, the fragrance of orchards permeates the air.

T/N: The 镇 Weights were similar to paper weights, and were used to keep mats/clothes in their place. It originated from the Qin and Han Dynasty, whereby people used to keep the mat in place (to prevent it from moving around when they got up). Sometimes, it'll be in the shape of an animal, like a lion for example.

芳: Another interesting point; Baidu interprets this as fragrance, but the physical book thinks it means to block off the wind from the head of the bed. 芳 is sometimes interpreted as 防 (to block in some ancient text)

芷葺兮荷屋，缭之兮杜衡。

The lotus form the house, and the ginseng flowers form the roof.   It’s scent intermingles with that of the wild ginger

And this is how wild ginger looks like!

合百草兮实庭，建芳馨兮庑门。

We gather various kinds of flowers and plants to fill the courtyard, and we’ve build a fragrant porch.

九嶷缤兮并迎，灵之来兮如云。 (The line that's in SHL)

The numerous gods of the Mount Jiuyi have arrived, they arrive as plentiful as the clouds as they greet Lady Xiang. 

T/N: 九嶷: Jiuyi mountain was the legendary burial place of the legendary Emperor Shun.  It’s a mountain range in Hunan Province, located at the south of the river Xiang 湘水南.

捐余袂兮江中，遗余褋兮澧浦。

I throw my outer garment into the river.  And I throw my inner undergarment into the Lishui.

搴汀洲兮杜若，将以遗兮远者。

Arriving at the island’s river bank, I pluck the flowers as I eagerly await for my lover.

时不可兮骤得，聊逍遥兮容与。

Good times won’t return once it has passed.  I’ll travel leisurely as I wander freely.

[stocky2016]

"Enigmatic Eccentric Me"

I live on my own, apart from my re homed Skye my dog

up here in my temporary Allesley accommodation

I'm a poet, does that make me "eccentric" or "enigmatic"

but I welcome visitors who I know understand my situation.

I can write at any or all times of the day

I love the "silence" and "isolation" it aids my creativity

When I'm writing the time just seams to fly by

I put on my music, fire up the iPad and I'm away.

I look forward to getting my Chadwick Green house back some day soon

It's been now a year since an eviction was first instigated...

Hunters my agency and the Courts work to such outdated processes

It cost me dear to stay in an Air BnB but pleasantly located.

I cook, shop keep my flat clean as best I can

I'm sure not to some people's standards but I try

to engage with my U3A groups and regular "tennis fours"

I'm not a bad garden labourer and in no way fresh-air shy.

I'm 75 this December and some would write me off as "old"

but I've survived abdominal Cancer now for a couple of years

My boys Jay and Will are out in Aus' and don't get to see them much

so my grandchildren Grace and Alexi have little influence to fear.

My friends are very special to me and generally understand

I'm a bit of a "one-off"; and a "funny one" in my ways.

Enigmatic or eccentric are i guess just labels for me but

I am caring and genuine whatever anyone else might say.

As a poet I write every day on subjects across the internet boards

I rarely miss a day when I'm not entering competitions or collaborating

Being retired and reasonably well off I can legitimately train and walk my dog

about 3 times a day I take Skye out her walks are never missing.

So it's a simple uncomplicated life I now lead

But I'm surprisingly contented with my lot and life I'd say

How much longer I'll be around I can't be sure

but health and happiness all have an important role to play.

I've missed my ski-ing since Covid struck

but hope to resume the sport I became quite competent in

With many ski-buddies and all the gear for off-piste sport

I must get a few more trips organised and get my eye back in.

Speaking of which, cataract surgery is on the not too distant horizon

with my sight now fading I must preserve what I've got left

Otherwise, I'm pretty fit for a guy of advancing years...

one of a growing pensioner band but retired from the graft.

I'm attending more funerals than wedding these days

so I guess I should stand in line, but with a Will already written

and Power of Attorney discussed ,I'm pretty well organised

with my organs up for grabs should anyone be smitten.

I've had a good life and yes it's had its "ups and downs"

but I remain solvent in pocket and generally sound of mind

I'm advised that to eat, drink and behave in moderation

gives me a chance of joining the "octogenarian" kind.

So here's my valedictory poem, a bit of an indulgence I grant you

but if I don't write something now, I'll never do it

But to those friends, followers and family members

It's at least a testimony that I lived a full life and kicked the ball a bit.

G.P.S. 5th November 2024

Graphics apersonal and self-owned.or courtesy of Google Inages

[chronotopes]

PERSONAL WRITING WRAPPED 2023

Getting this done significantly earlier than I got it done last year, which I think may in itself be an indication of being in "a better mental place."

Let's get to it.

CREATIVE NONFICTION, NEW FIRST DRAFTS:

"Catalogue of Thoughts, With Rebukes," January. CLASSIC katia journal entry turned essay format, which is "conversation between versions of myself." Artistic enough suffering that it totally counts as a cnf essay.

"I Can't Remember..." (titled in real life "my homework from brenda and julie"), January. Essay Written For Practice, specifically inspired by the prompt "Write an essay where every sentence starts with 'I can't remember.' Cathartic and has some bits of very pretty prose. Maybe I don't agree with the overall conclusions it draws, but I sure like it as a piece of writing.

"As the sun sets over [my local river], I consider Joan of Arc," January. broooo why were my early-in-the-year cnf titles so pretentious. Lyric essay meets prose poem but I'm choosing to classify it as a lyric essay. First draft dictated into my voice memos, mad scribe style. Man i used to love voice memos.

"Elegy for a life I can't live," April. Boooo emo bullshit booo but once again cathartic and perhaps more clear-sighted about things than the previous work. Anaphora got me through a lot in the first half of this year.

"I don't understand music," April. Finally, creative nonfiction that isn't about depressing shit! About a) piano and b) love, obviously. Needs a lot of editing but I am fond of her.

"Orthodox," July. Old poem about national identity and religion that I reformulated into a very unpolished essay.

"Two gay preteens and a lake monster," July. Another old poem, reformulated into a flash essay this time. Polished it enough to submit to a call for flash essay submissions and then never did.

"Nikolayevna," July. ALSO an old poem reformulated into a flash essay. This is my favorite trick and I will do it to all of my mid-but-promising poetry one day. This one's about ~generational cycles!~

"My dead boss and my dead friend," July. New addition to my senior spring flash essay series from last year.

"A spoiler, displaced in time," July. Another new addition to the senior spring flash essay, in an effort to make it more rounded with context I did not then have.

"[personal bullshit relevant situation], or 'The Kids from Yesterday.'" The Senior Spring Essays in their totality cannot ever seen the light of day for many reasons and one of them is that the ending rests partly on an MCR-based metaphor. Which is very silly.

"Justifications," October. Oh lord back to For Processing Purposes Only creative nonfiction. That's cool I guess. Mad about how good the prose in these quasi-journal entries is and the degree to which i did not write enough of them this year.

12 pieces in total.

CREATIVE NONFICTION, NEW DRAFTS OF OLD STUFF AND UNFINISHED BUT PROMISING NEW STUFF.

"Catalogue of Kitchenware," February-August. What it sounds like.

"Obsidian Greythorne's Depression Cannot Be Cured By Finding A New, Alive Girlfriend" and "Fornax And Annue Cannot Ever Have Sex For Reasons I Just Made Up," March-June. Two entries in an envisioned series of essays exploring adolescent sexuality/identity/experience through old fictionwriting adventures.

"Catalogue of Berries," July. Eastern Europe posting.

"On Taking the Waters," July. I said "Oh, I know what's missing from this old essay about being very sad in bath!" and stuck my friend who died in there. Classic essay trick.

"A Grand Palatial House of the Old South," July. Heterosexual roommate angst processing essay, refined.

"On being old enough to talk about the war," July. Flash essay (really edging out of flash essay territory, it got long) from last year about the Russian invasion of Ukraine, completely rewritten.

"A Hill in the [local civil war history location]," July. Also a flash essay from the senior spring essays, rewritten enough to count as a newish thing.

"A Car Is Like A Little House," August. Suburbia, weather, immigration, the interstate highway system, all the usual suspects in my writing.

Nine pieces in total.

POETRY:

"Myopia in seventh-grade notebooks," January. "It is january 2023, and one year ago I should have known better. / And unlike all of the other times I ruined my life, that time, it was for forever." Less Vent Poetry and more unified concept worth working from. About reading notes to myself in old diaries.

"Novice time traveler," February. Jesus christ reading through these is killing me. This one shares a lot of ideas with dialogues but is less good lol.

"3/23/2022," February. A sestina I wrote for Gabe on the occasion of our first anniversary, and certainly a sestina I like a lot more than the first sestina I wrote. Not groundbreaking stuff but I like it anyway. I would have to take a Real Poetry Class to get properly good at poetry, I think. For those curious: my words were moon, dare, blossom, spring, test, and time.

I would write Gabe little poems every day for the last few months of being longish-distance. Not all of them were good, and I cannot count them to save my life, but among them were "Sonnet for a job application," "Sonnet for an orchestra concert," "February Villanelle," "Sonnet for warmth," "Sonnet for Spring," "For Dusk," "For the sinking sun." Some of them will be something one day. Others had value in their ephemeral Baby Poem status.

Ten completed pieces in total, a whole lot more little stuff than that.

FICTION:

52 or so thousand words of what was once titled Adventures of the Extranei and is now titled fucking, like, Untitled Quartz the Novel Project, June-November. What started out as last year's fascination with an old, sprawling, deeply flawed novel turned into a perhaps-ill-advised attempt to rename (almost) all the characters and rewrite it to be coherent. Currently, it exists in the form of a 100-page outline and one nanowrimo's worth of novel (three parts out of like twelve complete). I'll go back to it after I finish Aivide, if only because of Sunk Cock Theory.

A rewritten prologue to what was once titled Adventures of the Extranei: The Next Generation and is now titled Dude If You Rewrite All Of Nextgen Too You're Going To Have To Start Asking For Money For It Because Seriously We're Talking 500k+ words of story here. What can I say, sometimes the grip of "I could do this BETTER" overtakes you.

Three edited existing chapters and one brand new revised chapter of AIVIDE THE PREQUEL, August-December. READ IT HERE, unless you haven't read Vinbre the Novel yet, in which case read Vinbre the Novel first. Very proud of the ways I've sneakily grown as a writer since first drafting the last three chapters, very glad for the opportunity to write it as I see it now and share it with the world.

About 85,000 words in total if you only count the completely new chapter of Aivide, somewhere around 100,000 if you count stuff I added to the old ones. I could probably be more accurate about it if I wasn't writing this at 2 AM on new year's eve. (Afternoon after edit: About 37,000 new words of Aivide + 51,980 words of Quartz + 10,007 words of nextgen bullshit = just about 98,000 words of fiction. yippee!!)

Overall, 26 completed(ish) pieces in total, counting the venty drafts and the revisions, which constituted a lot of what I wrote this year.

SUPERLATIVES:

Most Economical: "Two Gay Preteens and a Lake Monster," "My Dead Boss and My Dead Friend"

Most Romantic: "I don't understand music"

Greatest Potential: "A car is like a little house," "Orthodox"

Best Emerging Genre: Essay collections

Biggest Comeback: Fiction

Most Likely To Succeed: "Catalogue of Berries," "On Taking the Waters," "Orthodox," "A Car is like a little house"

The One You Should Read: Aivide the Prequel

Worst Girls of the Year: Quartz Greythorne and Aivide Thieri