#i have too many regrets for how young i am
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fallenandproud · 1 year ago
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i suppose this fits here but i just needed to get shit off my chest.
the idea of growing up terrifies me now. im 18 finally and ive graduated high school and i have a job and its not what i thought it would be. i dont remember the details, but i woke up thrashing and panicking this morning over. some dream that had something to do with growing up. i spent my whole goddamn life trying to get to this point as fast as i could, because it was the only way i could see to break out of my parents rules and restrictions and finally be free and be myself without fear.
and. now i made it. im here, i did it, and. id give anything to go back. i wasted so much time, so much energy, being afraid and letting that fear control me and focusing only on this one nebulous far off goal that i wasted my life. i missed every opportunity that might have been there had i decided to just stick up for myself instead. i already had a fucked up high school experience and i made it worse for myself out of fear.
im never getting those years back.
ive already lost so much to the way i was raised in the mormon church and now this, by proxy but still at my own hand, and its. i dont know. it makes me sick. i only ever wanted to be normal and this is what i fucking got and theres nothing i can do about it. my whole life was stolen from me because of this church, be it directly or indirectly and theres nothing i can do about it.
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nathaslosthershit · 10 months ago
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A Much Needed Interview (OP81)
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(Part 2 of Teen Dad) Summary: After the shock of Oscar revealing himself to be a former teen dad, he joins an interview in the hopes of clearing everything up and limiting the overwhelming amount of questions he has been getting.
“Oscar, it is nice of you to sit down with us. I know it has been an interesting few weeks for you and your family. How are you guys all doing?” The interviewer asks.
‘Yeah, y’know, I had expected to one day have to open up about it all, but I never thought I’d have to do it the way I did. It has been fine, obviously my kids are young enough to not be impacted because they aren’t on social media, but it has been strange for my fiancée who is now getting hundreds of requests on her private account. I have sort of decided to take a break from social media because the response has been overwhelming and like none before. Mostly positive but I think a few people have gotten the wrong idea so I was hoping to clear everything up.” Oscar rambled. He was more nervous about this interview than any he had done before.
“Of course. Why don’t we start at the beginning, how did you and your fiancée meet?”
“We actually met at one of my races. She went to support one of her close friend’s brothers. After the race that I sadly didn’t do too well in, I saw her with her friend and I was kinda frozen in my spot, immediately head over heels. Sadly, it seems like everyone but her noticed. I was too scared to do anything so I just watched her leave. I think I sulked for days, totally regretting my decision to do nothing. A totally heartbroken 16 year old. I looked for her every single race until she finally came back a few months later.”
“Oh please tell me you finally got the confidence to shoot your shot.”
“Nope! I just stared at her and stuttered when she caught me looking then ran off. I then had an amazing race, I think part of me was just trying to make up for the embarrassment and luckily it seems my car got the memo. After the race she came up to me and asked for my number.” God, he was blushing profusely at the memory. He knew he would be getting slack for this for a very long time. 
“Such a story! The young Oscar Piastri was no ladies’ man.”
“He was absolutely not. Soon after we started dating.” Oscar awkwardly laughed, sensing what was about to come up.
“And then kids came shortly after?” The interviewer asked with care in his voice, certainly able to sense Oscar’s change in attitude.
“Yeah. Uh, obviously not planned. I don’t think many people plan to become parent’s at 18. It was a shock… I didn’t handle it the best at first, something I think I will always regret. She was scared and while so was I, I should have been more supportive. I was embarrassed for a while. Felt like a total idiot. I didn’t tell anyone outside of my family and made them swear to secrecy. I also began to isolate myself from friends because I couldn’t bring myself to tell them but also felt terrible lying. A few months in I finally snapped myself out of it and began to focus on all the wonderfulness that was to come. I loved her more than anything and I would be lying if I said I hadn’t already imagined a life together in great detail. By the time we found out it was twins, a boy and a girl, I was ecstatic.”
“Well mate, I don’t blame you for your feelings. I definitely would have been a terrible father at 18 so I salute you.” The interviewer joked.
“Honestly, I had the same thought for a while, even when I was excited to have kids. I had so many doubts about it, I mean how could I not? But when it came down to it, I couldn’t afford to be anything less than a great father. Of course I had my moments, and still do years later, but I wouldn’t be able to let myself be anything less than I am. If you love your kids enough, you find a way.”
“How did having kids so young impact your career? Obviously it didn’t hurt it too much considering you are in your second year driving in Formula 1.”
“Well, I decided I wouldn’t advertise my situation unless a team was very serious about me. Prema knew, Alpine did too and of course McLaren does. All were welcoming and accommodating, as much as they could be. I don’t think I would have gone with any of them if they weren’t cool with it though. I realized the minute my kids were born I would give it all up for them, which scared the hell out of me.”
“That is admirable. All these years later you are still with their mother, correct?”
“Yes! I asked her to marry me over break. Everyone close to us had been confused as to why it took so long but we had discussed marriage together many times and made the decision that because our relationship moved so fast with having kids so young, we would wait a bit. I mean, we are still young but I honestly couldn’t wait any longer. She is everything to me and the most wonderful mother my kids could have.”
“Have your kids been around the paddock yet? I assume they are old enough to understand what you do.”
“They have been to the factory and come with me to meetings when we haven’t had a sitter for them. Luckily, they are both very well behaved in public, they also really like watching the races on tv and have somewhat of an understanding of what I do. They don’t believe I actually drive the car though.” Oscar rumbled. Trying to convince his twins that yes, their father actually does drive the cars they see going super fast, has been an ongoing issue. They seem to believe he is tricking them but have no problem believing Uncle Logan and Uncle Lando drive the cars. It has definitely humbled him immensely.
“Well you will have to fix that soon huh? Will they be attending races in the future?”
“I am trying to work that out with my fiancée actually. They are almost four so we don’t want them traveling too far, I also don’t believe they will be able to be entertained solely by the race the entire time so we have a lot to deal with. But I think seeing them on the paddock supporting me will be one of the best moments of my life. I selfishly can’t wait for them to come.”
The interview wrapped up shortly after that. Getting to reminisce on the start of his relationship and how far they have come and how many wonderful things are in the future put Oscar in a deliriously happy mood. He couldn’t wait to get home to his family. 
Walking through the door, he was immediately welcomed to the sound of toddler meltdowns. Fully entering the house, he saw his very tired fiancée rubbing her face as she tried to calm her babies down. Clearly this had been going on for a while.
Despite how upset she looked, she immediately perked up at seeing Oscar had returned. But that immediately went away as she remembered the screaming kids and how messy the house and herself were.
“Sorry honey, I know you are probably so tired after the interview and meetings earlier and these two missed their nap so they are so cranky and I just-” He cut her off with a kiss. Once he pulled away she looked at him, perplexed. A kiss from Oscar was never unwelcome but it was the last thing she expected at that moment.
“Hey, look at me.” He said as he put a hand on her cheek. “I love you and our little family so much and you never, ever have to apologize for something as trivial as this. Why don’t you go get in the bath and relax a little and I will try to wrangle these two, okay?” 
In her eyes, Oscar had never been hotter than he was now. Now it was her turn to surprise him with a kiss, even more passionate than the first. They would have continued if it hadn’t been for more screaming from their two kids.
Still, Oscar wouldn’t change a thing.
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moonchild033 · 3 months ago
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Moon in the Houses (Part 1)💃💝
This is primarily based on how Moon is related to CHANGES and what possible changes moon placements can bring over time. I've included some other random points too.💛
(These observations are based on the whole sign system, sidereal charts and all obs are subject to change with other aspects in the chart, so don't conclude anything with a single placement, take whatever that resonates and leave the rest,hope you enjoy giving it a read, take it lightly!) ❤
Moon in 1st house- Your overall personality might easily change from time to time. You could also make frequent changes in your appearance. The way you express yourself, whether you are in your confident era or low self esteem era can be easily noticed. You could've been someone who cared a lot for others and emotionally highly expressive but suddenly don't give a fu*k anymore and more closed off. In younger years you could've been more short tempered and take everything personal or straight to the heart, after sometime you find yourself easily moving on and not bothering too much. You are that person whose fashion sense improved a lot and had a mad glow up, people from your school could be amazed by seeing your recent Instagram photos lol. People could say, Oh i almost couldnt recognize you, especially around and after the age of 22. No matter the ascendant, your eyes could be very expressive and frequently blinking or distracted. You can experience significant weight gain or loss, sometimes you feel fat and sometimes lean, your weight could also fluctuate a lot but anyways pretty AF.💅🤩
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Moon in 2nd house- You could be an extreme saver, then could think life is to live why am I saving all this if I can't be happy NOW?! So u start to spend, then regret ur decision and go back to saving. You can face difficulty in differentiating between a hobby skill and technical skill you want to improve and pursue, especially can think about making your extracurricular skills as a main source of income. Ex.:You could be doing nail art for fun, then suddenly decides to make it a main career, not satisfied with the outcome and back to keeping it as hobby, this cycle can be noticed. You like to learn many languages or can easily adopt to different accents/slangs in speaking same language. Your stamina could've evolved from being great to lowest or vice versa. Your voice and tone might change, you can experience dry throat or have a husky voice. Food can be your comfort zone, eating good food can easily lighten up your mood instantaneously. You can be emotionally attached to your things, during childhood you could be that kid who had a fancy pencil that you don't give to anyone because you love and value it too much.💸⚡
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Moon in 3rd house- You could love your younger siblings or sometimes can't stand their presence, there is no inbetween. Your hearing capacity can reduce due to over usage of earphones, you could be someone who calms down by hearing music continuously. You could've been timid or scared to voice out your feelings or thoughts during young age but turn out to be more vocal about things you care about, striking them hard with your words boldly over time. You can just play music and go on a short trip or at least to the market or neighborhood places often to lighten up your mood quickly. You can find it hard to stay determined for a long time, the cycle of starting something enthusiastically, then feel bored, then rethinking whether it's right, then again feeling dedicated to start again can be seen. When compared with 2H in the same sense, 2H is more about feeling confused and 3H is more about feeling bored or distracted easily. You could write a daily life diary or a secret diary from childhood and maintain it. You just write out your emotions, whether it be just writing your life incidents in a diary or turning it into a poetry.🤠☺
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Moon in 4th house- The main theme here is how much of a homebody you are, then suddenly wanting to run away from home, then missing home so much, wanting to come back, again pissed off about staying in home for longer periods, then wanting to leave can be observed. Also the number of times you could've changed your house can be more than other placements, it doesn't have to be residing in different cities everytime, it could be just going to different neighborhood but the changing of houses can be there. Either you love your mother so much or have emotional scars from her, no inbetween but in both cases, the person can have a lot of sympathy and protective of mom. Incase of good placement, you can inherit maternal property easily, incase of neutral or bad placement, maternal properties could be in dispute. These people yearn a lot for comfort zone, they secretly want people around them to pamper and help them be comfortable. Afflicted moon can cause breaks in primary education, strong moon placement can give change of schools.💞💫
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Moon in 5th house- For some people, this can give major fluctuations in their mood, like they can go from being extremely bubbly to cussing at somebody in a microseconds. Can give interest in astrology. They could be curious to know what others will think about them and pay attention to it a lot. Incase of strong placement, you could've been the role model kid in your family, a star in whatever you did whether it be studies or extracurricular, this is that cousin we don't want to have lol. You can express your thoughts very clear and loud, you can be opinionated in various topics and tend to stick to it. Your intelligence is not limited to only the course you study, you expand your knowledge to different topics, especially can like politics or just a person who likes to stay up to date with everyday news and happenings. For some people, this can give a major love relationship earlier in life, if other placements support too then this is a potential placement that can attract a young, beautiful spouse and end up marrying the same person.😍🌟
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Moon in 6th house- You could feel choked with 9-5 jobs, can feel like it sucks out your joy and damages your mental health. You could've been someone who lived a structured life and entered a fine corporate job but it makes you rethink whether you have to continue doing this, you could've resigned from a hectic routine job atleast once or desperately wanting to do so. Your mental state can directly affect your health (happens for everyone but more easily for this placement). You could overthink a lot about something someone said eons ago. You are a conflict avoider, you don't get into anyone's issues or like to be a mediator, you yourself tend to gravitate away from conflicts even if it's directed towards you. Your friends can complain about this how you are not standing up for them but the issue is you can find it hard to stand up for yourself. Overtime this could flip off and you can burst out with a co worker or someone who's been pissing you off, gaining a shocked reaction from everyone. You can change from avoiding conflicts to slamming into the center of it by mentality fluctuations you could gain over time.😌💣
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Let's Learn and Grow Together!💋💅
With Love-Yashi ❤⚡
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(Here's a GIF I liked sm lol 😭😂)
Moon in houses part 2 here! ✨
MASTERLIST💖
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ki-yomii · 10 months ago
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personal taste | jjk
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➥ pairing | jeon jungkook x f!reader ➥ word count | 1.3k ➥ warning(s) | 🔞 smut; established relationship, teasing, bent in half, premature ejaculation, implied cum play, implied oral (f receiving), inexperienced!jk ➥ summary | jungkook gets a little too excited and cums early, but he's more than happy to make it up to you. ➥ notes | ✌️idk man, its 2 am. i hope you enjoy lol
💚 masterlist | inbox | AO3 💚
It was safe to say Jungkook wasn’t the most experienced of lovers when you first get together. Idol life consumed his adolescence, and by the time he’s a young adult, too many eyes are on his every waking move.
A quick affair is rarely worth the effort, and the ones that are leave much to be desired. Relegated to liquor-soaked make-out sessions, and quick, dirty fucks that leave him filled with more sweat and regret than satisfaction.
You’d only been dating a few months when he divulged why he got so jumpy any time your hand grazed his thigh, why he broke off your kisses before they got too heated.
He was adorably shy when he expressed how anxious he was about his performance in the bedroom; how the reality might not live up to your expectations.
But he shouldn’t have worried, having more than made up for any shortcomings with his eager to please attitude and boundless enthusiasm.
The number of times you’ve had sex since getting together can be counted on one hand, but he’s leaps and bounds ahead of where he was when you first started being intimate.
It certainly helps that Jungkook is a dedicated student; throwing himself, as he does with everything in life, full throttle into any and all efforts to learn the secrets of your body.
A quick learner, it isn’t long before he can make you cum with a skillful twist of his fingers, a harsh rut of the hips that settles him so deep inside your pussy, your thighs tremble.
Not only is he able to wring orgasm after orgasm out of you, his stamina is insane. Almost to the point where you’re having trouble keeping up with him, having to take little breaks between rounds to gulp down water and catch your breath. 
So… when it happens, it’s altogether unexpected.
But so fucking filthy hot you’re pretty sure you astral project to a higher plane of existence. 
You’d been teasing him all day: the brush of your hand across his ass, the skim of your knuckles over the crotch of his pants, pressing close against the wide berth of his back and whispering soft, nasty little nothings into his ear.
Delighting in the blush that crept up the sides of his neck. The cherry red burn of his ears as he gulped, readjusting himself before shooting you a glare.
Jungkook lasts longer than you give him credit for, though that’s most likely due to his competitive streak. He breaks all the same; however, shoving you into his bedroom as soon as the door to his apartment closes behind you.
So needy and desperate he can’t wait any longer, even if the rest of the boys are due to arrive in an hour.
You only just got undressed, the bed creaking under the combination of your weights when he cages you beneath him. His chest flexes with every hurried breath, his ribs expanding with labored puffs of air. His cock bullies its way inside your pussy, hips slotting into place against yours.
“J-Jungkook,” you whine, your toes digging into his sides as your thighs fall open across his. “So deep, I - haaah -”
The fat head of his cock nudges against your cervix with every little rut, sparks of pain fissioning out and deepening the warmth fizzling behind your belly button.
Thick and long, he stuffs your pussy to the brim every time without fail, stretching you wide until tears cling to your lashes and your nails dig into his shoulders.
It hurts no matter how long he spends prepping you, but you like it better this way. The pain only enhances the pleasure; deepens, and darkens.
And knowing he has to force his cock those last few inches because your pussy can’t take it without assistance always riles you up.
Makes you needy and desperate to take everything he can give like a good girl.
“Mm, I know, baby,” Jungkook’s breath hitches as his teeth tug on his lip ring, his eyes - half lidded and greedy - shadowed by the sweaty curtain of his bangs, “Feels so ffuh - fucking good inside you.”
“Hhn!” Your fingers inch up the corded muscles of his forearms, caressing over the whorls of ink as they shackle themselves to his elbows as he bends you in half. “Right there, right there. Jus like - ohmygod! - like that.”
Jungkook grunts, rocking into the cradle of your hips harder, the shaft of his cock dragging almost completely out only to slide to the hilt in one thrust. His pelvis grinds against the swollen bud of your clit as he holds himself there, your slick smearing into his skin.
He curses under his breath when your walls flutter, trying to milk him for all he’s worth. “Shit! Don’t - don’t do that, baby. I can’t - hnggg - I can’t -”
And then his cock throbs hard once, twice.
A litany of soft, breathy exhalations of pure pleasure accompanies the slick echo of your bodies crashing together. Then his head bends low, the dark briar of his hair clinging to his temples. His jaw drops slack, and a devastated moan punches out of his throat.
Muscles ripple into a full body shiver, Jungkook’s sharp hips stuttering against the backs of your thighs. Sticky warmth floods your cunt, and his hazy, lust-blown eyes stare into yours as he pumps you full of cum.
You groan, blinking up at him, “Did you just-?”
Jungkook’s arms buckle.
Flopping down onto you, a sweaty, panting mess, he tucks his hot face into the crook of your neck. Moist breath puffs across your skin, a ticklish awareness skittering down your spine. Goosebumps rise along your arms.
His heartbeat hammers against your ribs.
“Yeah, I - I…” Jungkook huffs, his nose dragging over the length of your collarbone, tongue flicking over your skin when he licks his lips. “I did. ‘m sorry, baby.”
Breathing in through your nose, you card a hand through his sweaty hair. Swallow down the pleading whines sitting on the tip of your tongue. You don’t want to embarrass him any more than he probably is.
He hasn’t cum this quick since the early days, and you’d rather not ruin the evening by making him spiral.
So even when your pussy flutters, trapped on the edge of an orgasm as his cum leaks out of you, you bite down on your impulses. Resign yourself to being horny for the foreseeable future until you can sneak away and take care of yourself with a vibrator.
“It’s alright, Kook. It happens.”
Your eyes close, and you breathe through your nose, trying to calm the gallop of your heartbeat.
Relaxing seems almost impossible with Jungkook’s constant shifting, but you try your best to get your body on the same page as your mind.
Only for all efforts to go to waste when Jungkook shimmies down between your thighs. The tips of his hair tickle your skin, your lower belly jumping at the sensation.
Furrowing your brow, you peek down at your boyfriend. “Kook, what’re you--?”
Broad palms caress your hips, Jungkook using his thumbs to trace over the jut of bone. His chest glitters under the light, the muscles shifting under his skin almost mesmerizing as he settles on his belly. Forearms hook over the tops of your thighs, and his dark eyes flash with hunger.
His mouth pulls up into an impish smirk. “Can I?” he asks, dropping his gaze to the apex of your thighs. “Please?”
He giggles when he sees how flustered you get. Syrupy sweet, boyish; altogether too endearing for the current circumstances.
“...Are you serious?”
You can’t deny the fresh wave of desire the thought brings - Jungkook with his thick fingers, his tender mouth and soft tongue stroking over swollen, abused flesh - but flap a hand between your bodies in a vague gesture all the same.
“Isn’t that kind of - you just, y’know?”
You aren’t the only one affected by the idea, Jungkook’s cock jerking feebly where it rests against his thigh. A pink tongue flicks out to run along the length of his red-bitten bottom lip, toying with his lip ring as his teeth sink into the soft flesh.
He regards you with predatory anticipation.
“Yeah,” he says softly. “I’ve always wondered what we taste like. Please let me.”
Well… who are you to refuse?
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dreamingofmarauders · 4 months ago
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You Belong With Me
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James Potter x Reader
Summary: In which despite having rejected you, James feels the uttermost jealousy of someone else being near you
Warnings: Jealousy, rejection, angry/a bit possessive James Potter, regret, arguing, cussing, crying (Let me know if I missed anything)
Word Count: 1.4k
A/N: I honestly don’t even know what I was thinking then, but this idea just randomly hit me so here it is lol. Hope you enjoy! ❤️
𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
•❅───✧❅✦❅✧───❅•
James tightened his hold on his glass of Firewhiskey, his gaze piercing dangerously as he watched you get too close with another guy. He clenched his jaw, downing his drink in one go before he tossed the glass back on the table, rage filling his whole being.
He had no right to feel like this. After all, he was supposed to be in love with Lily, not you. At least, that's what he kept trying to tell himself but as he watched you drape your arms around a Slytherin, both swaying to the music, he felt nothing but pure hatred for the male and absolute jealousy.
You should be in James' arms, not his.
James clenched his jaw, shutting his eyes as he inwardly groaned, as it came back to him once again, the memory so vivid it was as if the young Potter was reliving it once again.
You and James leaned against the railing of the Astronomy Tower, your eyes fixated upon the captivating night sky. You turned your head to look at the hazel eyed beside you, who gazed up at the twinkling stars with a soft smile sitting upon his lips. You and James had been best friends since you were children and your bond only deepened during the many years you spent together at Hogwarts. It was a weekly tradition for the two of you to stargaze together.
Your heart fluttered at the content expression on James' face, nothing but adoration in your eyes for him. Over the years, you didn't realize when but you had fallen for your best friend.
You were in love with James Potter.
However you kept that secret locked away in your heart, knowing James had been chasing after the redhead, Lily Evans, since you all were eleven.
Now as you admired James, the ways his lips curved or the twinkle in his hazel eyes, or his always messy black locks, or the way a dimple appeared whenever he smiled, the words slipped past your lips before you could stop them.
"I love you."
Your eyes widened with horror as James' rounded at that as well, turning to look at you in surprise.
You had mentioned many times how much you loved him but what caught James off guard this time was the way you spoke the words, the emotion behind them indicating a whole other meaning, a confession of you being in love with him.
"What?" He breathed out.
You sighed, knowing it was useless to deny it.
"I am in love with you, James."
"No." James uttered out in horror, taking a step back, causing a crack to form in your heart. "You can't be in love with me. I-I only love Lily."
Despite knowing the truth, your heart still shattered at the words that passed his lips, your eyes brimming up with tears.
Why had you even dared to hope he may reciprocate your feelings?
"I love Lily, Y/n. I could never love you." He said, as the tears slid down your cheeks. "I'm sorry." And with that James spun on his heels and hurried away, leaving you to stare after him, utterly heartbroken.
You had destroyed your own relationship with James, severing off the threads that had bonded the two of you together since forever.
You angrily wiped your face.
Why did every force in the universe always have to work against you?
The two of you haven't spoken since. James seethed as he watched Rosier pull you closer, but what really ticked him off was that your gaze had connected with his, and he knew that you knew what James was really feeling as you observed his very red face, before you inched your face closer to the Slytherin's.
That was the final straw for James Potter.
He immediately took a step in your direction but a hand latched onto his arm, rooting him to the spot.
"Mate, calm down."
James' furious gaze flickered to see who had dared to stop him, his eyes finding the silvery grey irises of his best friend.
Sirius knew exactly what had transpired, all the Marauders did. After all, you had been a fifth of their group, and your absence had impacted them all.
"Prongs, you need to calm down." Sirius instructed again, carefully analyzing James' facial expression.
This only angered the young Potter.
"Stay out of this, Black." He spat out and shrugged off Sirius' hand, ignoring his friend's protests.
James strutted over to you with nothing but fury and jealousy blinding him. When he reached you and Rosier, he shoved the Slytherin back, who shot the Gryffindor a death glare, grabbed your wrist and dragged you through the crowd of bustling and dancing teenagers, ignoring your protests. He finally dropped his hand from you when the two of you were in the silent corridor outside the Gryffndor common room.
You glared at James, who was staring back at you intensely, his jaw clenched.
"What the fuck, Potter?!" You yelled.
"What the fuck were you doing with that Rosier?! You were doing it on purpose!" James retorted back, silencing you for a mere moment before your face hardened.
"I can do whatever the hell I want, Potter, you have absolutely no right over my life!" You screamed at him, throwing your hands up in anger. "You told me you don't love me, you pushed me away, so how in the world do you get to decide what I can do and whom I can be with?! Why does it bother you so much?!" You shrieked at him.
However the next second, your back was pressed against the cold stone wall as James closed the distance between the two of you, caging you in his arms as his lips pressed to yours. You tried to resist, knowing this wouldn't end well, but the feel of him on you ignited a fire that yearned for more and your hands slithered to lock behind his neck, as you both poured out all your emotions into the kiss.
When the need for oxygen became great, the two of you pulled away, James placing his forehead against yours, as the both of you panted.
"This isn't fair to me, James." You breathed out, your eyes brimming once again. "You can't say you want Lily but then not let me live my life either." A tear slid down your cheek as your voice became heavy with emotion.
James lifted his head back, raising his hand to softly brush away your tears, placing a kiss on both of your cheeks before he peered into your y/e/c eyes, his gaze so intense that it seemed he was looking right into your soul.
"I am so sorry, love. I was wrong. I kept telling myself that it's Lily, but," He shook his head rather vigorously, "I've missed you more than ever since that day. My heart keeps calling out to you and I tried to push it down, but seeing you with another made me fully realize that there is no one else I would rather have than you." He confessed, placing his hand on your cheek, relishing in the way you leaned into his touch.
He continued, whilst lovingly caressing your cheek.
"My life is colorless and dull without you, y/n/n. I want you, darling. I... I love you." James uttered out, watching your face flood with astonishment, noticing the way you had stilled in his hold. Knowing he couldn't lose your attention, he went on, "I know I was an absolute jerk to you that day and today, but I promise you my love, if you give me the chance, I will spend the rest of my life, spend each day proving to you how much I really do care for you." James professed, his heart pounding heavily as he awaited your response.
You stared at him in complete shock, eyes round, making James afraid that he had truly lost you for good. However, a rush of relief flooded James' body when your beautiful lips slowly curved up into a tiny smile.
"I'll give you one chance, Jamie, just one."
The biggest smile you had ever seen graced James' face at your answer, and he cupped both your cheeks, "Thank you! Thank you!" He lifted you off the floor, spinning you around before he gracefully set you back on your feet, his arms going to settle around your waist. "I promise you that you will not regret this, darling."
And James Potter lived up to his promise, as each day after that, he made sure to show you how much he truly did love you, and Merlin were you above the clouds to have landed the man of your dreams, disbelief still clawing at you from time to time that James Potter loved you back just as much as you loved him.
•❅───✧❅✦❅✧───❅•
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canirove · 5 months ago
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The invinsible princess | Chapter 1
"Champions of Europe"
Index | Chapter 2
Masterlist
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“C’mom, go talk to her. Look at how miserable she looks.”
“Why don't you go talk to her?”
“Because she doesn't fancy me, Gavi” Ferran smirks.
“That's something the press made out.”
“Or not” Ferran shrugs. 
“If you don't go talk to her, I will.”
“Fermín, don't you have a girlfriend?” Gavi says.
“Yeah. And?”
“You can't go talk to the princess. That's cheating.”
“It's just talking, Gavi. Relax” he chuckles.
“Unless the press sees you and then boom! Fermín the Prince” Ferran laughs. 
“Fermín I of Spain. Sounds cool, I like it. What do you think, Pedri? Pedri?” he says, looking around for his teammate.
“Where is he going?” Ferran asks.
“He’s… Oh my God, he's walking towards the princess!” Gavi gasps.
“There he goes. Pedro I of Spain” Fermín chuckles
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“And then it all had been a mistake!”
“That is so funny” my dad laughs. “Isn't it, Sofía?”
“So funny” I say with my best fake smile. 
Why am I stuck with a bunch of old men? This is a party to celebrate that Spain just won the Euros. I should be out there mingling with the young people, talking with the players and their families, getting to know them all a bit and properly congratulate them. But no. I'm stuck with a man telling us about his latest golfing trip to Scotland. 
“Something similar happened to me last time we went to Mallorca” my dad says, making me already disconnect from the conversation. I know which anecdote he is about to share. I probably already know it by heart just from hearing him telling about it to everyone he's met lately. So instead of listening to him, I start looking around.
There are some players dancing with their partners, others playing with their kids (which is the cutest thing ever), others are just chilling… And then, there is someone wearing red and a medal around his neck walking towards me. Or trying to. 
“Right, Sofía?” my dad says again.
“Yeah, yeah” I nod. 
One of the good things about him having told this anecdote so many times is that, by now, I also know when he asks for my support and how I have to react to it, what I have to say. Which comes very handy when your eyes are stuck on the guy smiling and standing in front of you, and who is currently moving his head to one side to make you follow him somewhere. 
“Dad, do you mind if I go get myself a refill?” I ask him.
“Yes, sure. But just beer.”
“Just beer, I promise” I smile before finally leaving the group of men and following Pedri. 
Oh, yes. Because the guy who had been smiling at me and asking me to follow him, was freaking Pedri González. 
“Ma’am” my bodyguard says behind me. “Are you going somewhere?”
Shit. Fuck. I had forgotten about him.
“I'm just going out to get some fresh air. I'm feeling a bit dizzy” I say with a nervous laugh.
“Alone?” he says, looking at the glass door that leads outside the room, Pedri waiting on the other side.
“I… Ummm… It'll be just five minutes.”
“Ma'am…”
“Five minutes, Carlos. It's not like he can kidnap me or something with his leg like that” I chuckle. 
“He cannot, no. But what about others? You are Spain's Princess.”
“But not the heir. No one cares about me.”
“Don't say that, ma'am.”
“It's the truth” I shrug. “Anyway, can I go outside for five minutes? Please? He may just want a photo for his mum.”
“Ok, fine” Carlos sighs. “But don't leave the building.”
“I won't, I promise” I smile before basically running towards the door. He may still regret letting me go.
Once outside, it takes me a moment to find Pedri. When I spot him, he is resting against one of the huge windows, checking the brace he has to wear on his knee. 
“Is it too uncomfortable?” I ask him as I walk towards him.
“Uh?” he says, looking up. And maybe, just maybe… I gasped when the lights from outside illuminated his face in all the right places.
“The brace. Is it uncomfortable?”
“A bit, yeah” he smiles. 
“I'm sorry about what happened.”
“Thank you” Pedri smiles again. “Though everything worked out in the end” he says, touching his medal. “Do you want to try it?”
“Oh, I, ummm…”
“Here” he says, taking it off before walking towards me and putting it around my neck, carefully untucking my hair so it doesn't get tangled with the strap. “Perfect. How does it feel?”
“Heavier than I expected” I chuckle.
“It can't be heavier than a crown” he laughs.
“I don't know. I've never tried on one.”
“Wait, really?”
“Yeah. It's not like I'm gonna be the one who is gonna have to wear it. That's my sister, the heir.”
“But you still are a princess, aren't you? Don't all princesses wear crowns?”
“Nope. I may get to wear a tiara one day if I'm invited to a big event like a royal wedding or a reception for someone important, but other than that…”
“I'm sorry.”
“Oh, don't be. Sometimes being the second born that everyone forgets about actually comes with its perks. Like being here today, for example.”
“I thought it was because you liked football.”
“That too” I chuckle.
“And football players?” Pedri asks me. “Do you also like them?”
“What?”
“My friends were talking about you fancying Gavi.”
“That's my sister, not me.”
“Ha! I knew it! I knew it was her and not you. But they were so convinced they didn't want to listen to me.”
“I'm used to people mixing us, don't worry” I say while playing with the medal. “And I actually am more into dark haired guys than brunettes like him.”
“Are you?”
“Yeah” I shrug, still focused on the medal. 
“Anything else you like in your men?” 
“Why are you interested?” I ask him, looking up and at his face, a little smirk on his lips. 
“Just curious about how the future Prince of Spain could look like” he shrugs.
“Well… I like men with interesting noses.”
“What?” he laughs.
“Yeah… I don't know how to explain it. But if you look at the list of men I'm attracted to, famous or not, they all have that in common. Yours would actually make the cut.”
“My nose?” he laughs again.
“I… It is too weird, isn't it? Urgh” I say, covering my face with my hands. And that, my friends, is how you ruin things with the guy you are trying to flirt with. 
“No, no. Not at all. Is just that no one had complimented my nose before. Most girls talk about my lips.”
“Your lips?” 
“They say they were made to kiss and be kissed. What do you think?”
“What?” I say, still covering my face.
“Are my lips kissable or not, your royal highness?” Pedri says, his hands suddenly on mine, moving them away to rest at my sides. But he doesn't let go once they get there. He keeps holding them, his fingers playing with mine, his thumbs sometimes caressing my knuckles or the inside of my wrist and sending waves of heat all the way up my arms. 
“They are ok” I manage to say.
“Just ok? I think I'm gonna have to move closer so you can see them better” he says, closing the space between us a bit more. 
“They just look like lips” I shrug. But that's a lie. Because his lips do look made to kiss and be kissed.
“Maybe if we moved towards the light…” he says, his hands suddenly on my waist, moving me until my back is against the big window, the light once again hitting his face in all the right places. 
I knew Pedri was handsome, but this handsome? Wow.
“Better now?”
“Let me see…” I say as I move forward a little bit, the medal doing it with me and hitting his chest. We are so close right now… “Nothing. Just lips.”
“Well, if you can't see anything, I'll guess we'll have to try with a different sense. Like touch, for example.”
“What?”
“How does this feel, your royal highness?” he says, gently taking one of my hands and kissing it, the other still resting on my waist.
“You can start calling me ma'am now. Royal highness is just for the first time you address me.” And how I've managed to give him a protocol lesson while feeling my skin burn on the spot where his lips have been, will forever be a mystery.
“Ma'am sounds like something for someone old. What about my lady?”
“You could also call me by my name” I shrug. 
“We just met, my lady. Aren't you going too fast?” Pedri smirks.
“Me? Who is the one looking for a way to kiss me?” I smirk back.
“Busted” he laughs. 
“Though if you want to kiss me, you just have to ask.”
“Ok, then. May I kiss you… my lady?”
“You may” I whisper. 
“Thank you” he smiles. “But…” he says, stopping just as his lips brush against mine. “After I've done it, will you tell if my lips are made to kiss and be kissed?” 
“I will.”
“A princess must keep her promises.”
“I will, I promise. Now are you going to kiss me or not?”
“As my lady commands” he smirks before finally doing it and kissing me. Pedri… the Pedri… is kissing me. And it is… wow. Just wow. “And?” he whispers against my lips.
“I haven't told you to stop.”
“So bossy” he chuckes.
“Well, I am your princess, am I not?”
“You are, yes.”
“Then as your princess, I'm telling you, Pedri González, to keep kissing me.”
“With my lips made to kiss and be kissed?” 
“With your lips made to kiss and be kissed, yes” I say, making him smile before kissing me again and… Oh, my God.
I thought winning the Euros earlier had felt amazing, but I was wrong. Being kissed by him, and in the way he is right now, is what truly feels amazing. 
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━
“I think this is yours” I say, giving Pedri his medal back.
“It looks better on you, tho.”
“Oh, stop it” I laugh, putting it around his neck, the place where my hands were resting not that long ago.
“It's the truth” he shrugs. “And do we seriously have to go back in there?” he says, nodding towards the party.
“We do, yes” I sigh. “But, we are meeting again tomorrow.”
“We are, yes. And you've promised me a tour of the palace. And a princess…”
“Keeps her promises” I smile.
“Exactly” Pedri smiles back. And we stay like that, just smiling like two idiots, until someone clears his throat behind us. Carlos, my bodyguard. “I think that's our cue to go inside.”
“I think it is, yes.”
“Do you think he will send the secret service after me if I kiss you one last time?” he whispers.
“There is nothing like trying” I shrug.
“Ok, then. Bro, look the other way!” he says to Carlos while I just laugh, his hands suddenly cupping my face before kissing me one last time. “No secret service?” he whispers, opening one eye. 
“No secret service.”
“Thank God” he sighs, making me laugh again. “Anyway… I should probably go in first, shouldn't I? Distract everyone with my limping so they won't look at you.”
“Oh, don't worry. No one looks at me, I'm the invisible princess.”
“Only someone blind would not look at you, my lady.”
“Thank you” I say, feeling my cheeks getting warm. We've been kissing and flirting, and him saying that is what finally makes me go shy. “But like I told you, I don't mind being invisible sometimes. This” I say, playing with the strap of his medal. “Would have not been possible if I was the heir. And the secret service would have definitely jumped at you the moment you got too close.”
“Lucky me, then” Pedri smiles.
“Lucky us” I smile back. “Now go. I can see Carlos getting impatient.”
“Urgh, fine… See you tomorrow?”
“See you tomorrow.”
“Ok. Good night, my lady” he says, kissing my cheek.
“Good night, sir” I giggle as I watch him walk back into the party, laughing one more time when he turns around to look at me and blows me a kiss.
“Feeling better, ma'am?” Carlos says behind me.
“Much better” I smile. 
“Then I'm sorry about what I'm about to tell you, ma'am.”
“What?” I say, turning around to look at him.
“It's about him, about Pedri. Something I heard his friends talking about when I went back inside to give you some… privacy.”
“Carlos, you are starting to worry me.”
“I… I'm sorry, ma'am.”
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━
The next day…
“My lady.”
“Pedri.”
“I wasn't expecting to be offered croquetas at the royal palace” he chuckles, nodding at the table in front of us.
“Yeah, well.”
“When we met earlier it was kind of awkward, wasn't it? Shaking hands with your parents and your sister, acting as if we didn't know each other and nothing had happened last night…”
“Did something happen last night?” I ask, eating an olive and finally looking at him. “Besides you winning the Euros, I mean.”
“We… you… what?” he says with a confused look.
“I don't remember anything important happening” I shrug.
“You don't… Oh. Oh, I get it. You are teasing me because out here someone could hear us” Pedri says, looking around at his teammates. After meeting the whole team inside the palace, we are now in the gardens, everyone chatting, having a drink and relaxing before they have to go to Cibeles to celebrate.
“I'm not teasing you, Pedri. I don't remember anything” I shrug again. “Wait, no. I do remember one thing” I say, moving forward. “That you are a dick” I whisper in his ear before walking away.
“That I'm what? What are you talking about?” he says before following me. 
“Is your hearing also injured?”
“My hearing is perfect, my lady” he says, struggling to keep up with me. “What I don't understand is why.”
“Why what?” I say, suddenly stopping. We've walked away from where everyone else is, kind of hidden behind some bushes.
“Why are you calling me a dick? What did I do?”
“Do you seriously have to ask?” I laugh.
“Yeah.”
“I can't believe it” I laugh again. “You fucking used me, Pedri!”
“What?”
“You used me to have a laugh with your friends! You made a bet with them to see who could get a kiss from me first!”
“What?” he says again, looking more and more confused by the second.
“Carlos heard them talking about it, so don't you dare try to deny it. I'm sure you all had a laugh this morning when you told them everything that happened between us.”
“We don't… I…”
“I was an easy target, wasn't I? The poor princess that no one looks at, the one who always is in the shadow of her sister, who always is the second option. I'm sure you felt so proud when you told them how easily I fell for your charms, how stupid I was. But not anymore, you hear me. Not anymore.”
“That's not what happened” Pedri says, grabbing me by the arm when I try to walk away, earning himself a even more deadly look than the ones I was already giving him. “Sorry. I'm sorry” he says, letting go. “But please let me explain myself.”
“Why? Why would I do that? You manipulated me once, you could do it again. I am that stupid.”
“You aren't stupid, and I didn't manipulate you. I…” he says, running a hand through his hair. “The boys were talking about who could get you out of your misery, that's true. We were watching you talking with your dad and those men, and you looked so… Bored. Like you wished to be anywhere but there. But I wasn't part of it, I swear. I actually was getting mad while listening to them and the way they were talking about you. So before any of them found the guts to go talk to you just for fun, I did it myself. Not the go talking with you for fun part. The one about finding the guts to go talk to you. Because I… I have a bit of a crush on you.”
“What?” I laugh.
“Yeah” he says, nervously touching his cheek. A cheek that had turned almost as red as his Spain's shirt. “Here, look” he says, taking his phone out of his pocket. “I have proof.”
“Proof of what? You being an idiot?”
“An idiot for you, yes” he says, showing me what he had been looking for on his phone. “It's a WhatsApp conversation I had with my brother yesterday before the game when it was announced that you were attending. You can check the date and the time, it isn't fake.”
Your girlfriend is gonna be at the game tonight 🤭 If you win she may give you a kiss 😚 Instead of Casillas and Sara Carbonero, Pedri and the princess ⚽👸🏻👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 
“This… This means nothing” I say, giving him his phone back. 
“I can show you more messages from him teasing me about it. Look.”
People are shipping Gavi with the princess after the game 😂 Maybe he could introduce you to her little sister 😏 Gavi king and you prince 😂
“I… Pedri…”
“Everything that happened last night was real. I swear it” he says. “I didn't kiss you because of a bet with my friends. I kissed you because I wanted to. Because I like you.”
“You don't know me. Like, you barely know anything about me, only what the press publishes.”
“I know enough. Because to me” he says, taking one of my hands on his, his thumb caressing my knuckles like he had last night. “To me you aren't invisible or someone's shadow. To me, you shine brighter than anyone else. King, queen, heir to the throne or whatever.”
“That's so cheesy” I chuckle.
“But the truth.”
“Pedri, I…” I say, meeting his eyes. He isn't lying. Everything he's said about kissing me because he wanted to and not because of a bet, about liking me, about me not being the invisible princess I always believe myself to be… All that is true. I can see it in his face, on his blushed cheeks, in his eyes. He is being honest about it all. “I believe you.”
“You… You do?”
“I do” I nod.
“Thank God” he sighs. “I thought any moment now you would call the secret service and they would send me to… Where do they send people when they arrest them?”
“Can't tell you. It is the secret service for a reason” I wink.
“Makes sense” he chuckles. “But does this mean that I am not a dick anymore or…?” he says, closing the space between us a bit.
“Well… There is something you could do to make me completely forget about it” I say, also moving closer towards him.
“Something like what?” he asks, his other hand finding mine, now both his thumb caressing my skin, bringing back the waves of heat I felt last night. 
“You could kiss me with those lips of yours” I smirk.
“Here?” he says, looking around. “What if someone comes this way and sees us? Like someone from the team, your dad or… your mum. Your mum is quite scary, you know?”
“Oh, I know” I laugh. “But if we move over here…” I say, walking us behind a big tree, my back against it. “No one will see us. We'll be… invisible” I smile.
“You are anything but invisible, my lady” Pedri smiles back, his hands letting go of mine and moving to rest on my waist.
“Then show me” I say, wrapping my arms around his neck. 
“Will you then give me a tour of the palace? You promised it last night, and a princess…”
“Keps her promises, I know.”
“Exactly” he smirks.
“First we kiss, then we do the tour. But just so you know, Carlos will probably join us.”
“Wait, is he here?” Pedri says, looking around, his eyes wide.
“He may be hiding behind a bush, yes” I laugh.
“Shit. If he sees together after what he heard last night…”
“I'll explain everything to him, don't worry. But if you are being serious about getting to know me…”
“Deadly.”
“Then you better start getting used to his presence.”
“I think I can do that. Because you” he says, brushing his nose against mine and making me giggle. “Are worth it, my lady. So worth it” Pedri says before finally kissing me again, making me feel what he has been telling me since we met: that I'm not just someone's shadow, a second option. That I am not the invisible princess anymore. 
459 notes · View notes
silverynight · 2 months ago
Text
Recharge
Based on the mha manga finale
"Your childhood friend is taking too many extra shifts; he'll pass out soon at this rate."
Aizawa does that a lot lately; he casually walks into Izuku's classroom or his office, only to drop random information about Katsuki. It's usually something Aizawa disapproves of.
Izuku sighs, looking up at the window from all the essays he has to grade. Lately, Katsuki is making him worry too much.
The funny thing is that Aizawa believes he has some secret power to make pro hero Katsuki stop or change his mind; sure, they're friends, and he often listens to Izuku (yes, he also pays him a lot of visits) but it's not like the young teacher can work miracles.
"I'll talk to him," he promises. This time, he needs to think about something to make him take a break. He doesn't want Katsuki to end up hurt during one of his missions because he's too tired to focus.
Izuku spends a couple of minutes staring down at his phone; thinking about what to text Katsuki. The truth is that they see each other pretty much every week, and he's the one who usually asks Izuku if he can go to his apartment or hang out with him.
Izuku never reaches out first and it's not because he doesn't want to; the only reason he doesn't ask Katsuki to come is because he's aware how hard it's for pro heroes to make time for social stuff. Besides, he doesn't want to bother him.
Now, it's been two weeks since he last saw Katsuki; Izuku has been thinking about it even before Aizawa approached him, but he refused to mention anything about that to Katsuki because he didn't want to annoy him. He had decided to wait because it was obvious Katsuki hadn't contacted him for a reason.
However, if it's because he's been overworking himself on purpose, Izuku needs to make him stop before he collapses or at least try to talk to him out of it.
Hi, Kacchan!
Do you have time today to hang out with me? We can stay at my place and order takeout!
He sends it before he regrets it. Izuku bites his bottom lip, but forces himself to look at the works he's grading because he seriously needs to get back to it.
Katsuki answers just a few minutes later, and it's a bit surprising considering how busy Aizawa said he was.
I have another patrol later today. I won't be free until 2 am. But maybe I can come over in two days?
Is it his second one in a day or his third? Izuku's mind fills itself with anxious thoughts and wonders when was the last time Katsuki had a proper night's sleep. Why is he overworking himself? Pro heroes make good money, he shouldn't be struggling financially...
He doesn't ask any of those questions or tells Katsuki to reschedule. Izuku has no idea why Aizawa is always so sure he can make Katsuki change his mind. His friend has more important things to do now; honestly, it's a miracle he finds the time to hang out with Izuku once a week.
He shouldn't insist, but Izuku decides to be honest.
Don't worry about it! We can see each other when you have more time!
I just miss you, that's all! Good luck with your patrol, Kacchan!
Izuku leaves his phone next to him on the table, takes a deep breath, and gets determined not to worry about his friend for a while.
An hour later, he gets another text from Katsuki.
Ashido is going to take that last patrol. I'll be at your place at 6 pm.
Izuku grins before going back to his own work, determined to finish everything by 5; he'll have enough time to take a shower and tidy his apartment a bit before Katsuki arrives.
Just when he's done with the essays, he gets another message.
I miss you too.
Izuku has to cover his face after that one; he's not sure why it makes him blush.
***
Izuku is more or less satisfied with his work when there's a knock at his door. Katsuki is at the other side, hair still dripping wet from his shower, wearing casual clothes and carrying a few boxes of takeout.
"Kacchan!" Izuku beams, making his friend smile in response. He takes the boxes from his hands and walks towards his little kitchen as the pro hero takes his boots off and leaves them at the entrance.
He's still way taller than Izuku, even without the boots.
"You brought katsudon!" The excitement in his voice is obvious, but he doesn't try to hide it. "Thank you, I–Kacchan?"
He turns around, only to be pulled into a tight embrace; Katsuki tilts his head down in order to nuzzle against Izuku's green curls. He takes a deep breath.
"I missed you so much, nerd," he mumbles, sincerely, almost like he can't stop himself from doing it.
Izuku giggles, hoping the blush on his cheeks is not too obvious, and he tries to step away, only for Katsuki to pull him right back into his arms with a grumpy huff.
"Wait. I need to recharge," the pro hero insists, resting his head on the teacher's shoulder. "Alright. I'm better now. Besides, you must be hungry."
Only when Izuku takes a few steps back he notices how tired Katsuki actually looks. There are shadows under his eyes, his face has a few cuts, and Izuku just knows his muscles must be killing him.
Narrowing his eyes, the green haired teacher cups his friend's face, watching as Katsuki closes his eyes and surrenders into the touch.
"I'll fix those scratches, and I bring you something for the sore muscles. Sit here," Sometimes Izuku gets a little bit bossy when he's worried, but he doesn't realize it until it's too late.
Besides, Katsuki never complains, in fact, he does as Izuku asks without hesitation.
After he patches the pro hero up, trying not to get distracted by his intense stare, Izuku sets a few plates and arranges the counter so they can eat together.
They eat mostly in silence, although it's difficult for him to focus just on his delicious food because Katsuki keeps staring at him.
His face is slightly warm, and he gets so flustered he decides to talk about his students and then ask about Katsuki's day.
When Katsuki starts mentioning his shifts and patrols, Izuku decides to bring up the topic that has been worrying him the most.
"So you've been taking extra shifts?"
Katsuki nods, exhaustion visible on his features.
"You should take a break, Kacchan. Maybe a day off."
"I'm fine."
Even though Katsuki has changed, he's still as stubborn as he was when they were teenagers.
Izuku tries not to roll his eyes.
"I'd like to see you more often," he mumbles, feeling nervous. "I miss you when you're not here."
It's completely true, but part of him regrets saying it; it's not like Katsuki has time to make Izuku feel better. They're just friends.
"I'll try not to take too many shifts," Katsuki surprises him saying. His cheeks are slightly pink too. "So we can hang out more."
The young teacher beams in response, unable to hide his joy. Katsuki smiles back, leaning closer, looking flustered too.
"It's just... I have a project," he says after a while. "And I need to save a lot of money for it. It's... really important to me."
Oh. Izuku understands and he also has the feeling Katsuki doesn't want to give him too much information about it; it's okay. He'd do the same if he wasn't sure he was going to make it happen.
He can see how important it is for him in the way his red eyes shine. Izuku is almost sure Katsuki is going to open his own agency! It must be that!
"Will you tell me more once it's ready?"
Katsuki grins from ear to ear before getting closer to him; for a moment, his exhaustion vanishes as those red eyes meet Izuku's. He grabs both his hands in his.
"I promise. I can't wait for you to see it, Izuku."
There's something about the way Katsuki says his name that has Izuku blushing even more; his eyes stare at him with something close to adoration, but he's not sure and he certainly doesn't want to get the wrong idea so the teacher decides to ignore it.
He jumps from his seat and starts cleaning the counter before doing the dishes instead.
Katsuki offers to help, but Izuku asks him to wait in the living room while he finishes.
"You should stay tonight," he whispers next to him, leaning over the couch after a couple of minutes. He catches Katsuki dozing off.
The pro hero must be truly exhausted.
"What?" Red eyes blink back open in a second. The words seem to have caught him off guard. "You mean..."
"Yes," Izuku smiles, noticing that Katsuki is leaning closer. "Stay with me."
"But what... I mean, we should at least talk about it first," the pro hero blurts out, flustered, his face turning into a deep shade of red that makes the teacher worry. "I don't want this to be a casual thing. Besides, I have never–"
"What do you mean casual?" He cuts the blond off, feeling completely lost. "Well... If you want to, we can have regular sleepovers! What about every two weeks or so?"
It's perfect! That way, Katsuki wouldn't be able to take that many extra shifts!
The noise of Katsuki facepalming himself is so loud it startles Izuku. That big hand slides down his features like he's trying to gather some patience and strength at the same time.
"Of course you were talking about a sleepover," he mumbles so quietly the teacher wonders if he heard it wrong. Then, staring back at Izuku, he adds: "Yes, we can do that."
"Great!"
***
"I'm not wearing that!"
"Come on, Kacchan!" Izuku pouts, looking at the oversized All Might t-shirt and the pants that might not go along with it, but they're the same brand and are, in fact, very comfortable.
"Listen, I own a few things that are All Might themed too, but this is just awful," Katsuki grimaces, looking at the clothes like they have offended him personally.
"You can't sleep on those jeans," the green haired teacher protests. "You won't be able to sleep properly. Besides, this is the only thing I have that you can wear. My clothes are too small for you. I promise this really comfy! I love to wear these to sleep!"
Katsuki visibly relaxes when Izuku says that last bit; he looks from him to the clothes a couple of times.
"You wear these to sleep? Aren't they too big for you?"
"Yes, but I love oversized clothes!" Izuku smiles.
The pro hero stares down at him for a couple of seconds without saying anything; Izuku wonders if he forgot about what they were talking about when he suddenly blinks, snapping himself out of it, and then turns slightly pink.
"Fine. I'll see if I have something else–"
"No," Katsuki yanks the clothes right from Izuku's hands. "I'll wear them."
When Katsuki joins him in the living room again, he admits to himself that his friend was absolutely right about the clothes.
They fit him, but they don't look like his style at all.
"You look like a nerd, Kacchan," Izuku says before bursting into laughter.
"You little shit! This was all a trap to make me wear this crime against fashion! My parents would have a stroke if they saw me in this!" He lunges towards Izuku, making the teacher laugh even harder.
When Katsuki catches him in his arms, prompting them to fall over the couch, Izuku realizes the pro hero is chuckling too.
However, when the laughter dies, they're still wrapped around one another on the couch, and Katsuki refuses to look away from Izuku; the younger teacher gets too flustered he pushes his friend away.
"Let's watch a movie!"
Katsuki insists he needs to recharge first and the best way to do that is if he's as close to Izuku as possible so he ends up with the pro hero's head over his lap.
They only watch the first half of the movie, and Izuku is not sure Katsuki watched it at all because he caught the pro hero staring up at him a couple of times instead.
Katsuki falls asleep quickly after Izuku starts running his fingers through his blond hair.
The teacher sighs, turns the TV off and checks his mail on his phone while Katsuki sleeps. He reads a few of his students' works for a while before carefully waking Katsuki up.
They have a "discussion" about who gets to sleep on Izuku's bed, and the teacher ends up losing, so he brings an extra futon to the living room so Katsuki can sleep comfortably.
The pro hero wakes up first and is already making breakfast for two when Izuku walks out of his bedroom.
They chat for a while before Katsuki gets ready for work.
At the entrance, he hesitates right after putting his boots on before turning around again and pulling Izuku into a hug.
"Recharging?" He chuckles, hugging him back.
"More like getting some extra energy for the day." He whispers as he nuzzles against Izuku's curls.
"Okay, Kacchan."
"Let's do this next week," he says, smiling down at him, thumb stroking the teacher's scar on his right cheek.
"Yes!"
"I'll see you this Friday, Izuku."
***
As soon as he sees Ashido's smirk at the other side of the break room, Katsuki sighs, but he still walks towards her.
"I'm guessing it went really well with Midoriya. You haven't stopped smiling since you got here."
Katsuki is really bad at hiding his true feelings for Izuku, which is why he finds it ridiculous and frustrating how the nerdy teacher hasn't realized it himself yet.
"Yeah."
"I don't know if I should feel glad because it looks like you slept through the night or sorry because he didn't keep you awake."
Ashido wiggles her eyebrows in such a way Katsuki is not sure why he keeps falling for her stupid teasing.
But he blushes anyway and swears he'll never tell her that for a moment he thought Izuku wanted to sleep with him.
He would have done it gladly, but he would have professed his undying love for Izuku first because Katsuki doesn't do things by halves.
Loving Izuku is a lifetime commitment.
"SHUT UP!"
"Fine," she makes a dismissive gesture with her hand. "You're no fun."
Katsuki grabs the bento Izuku shoved into his hands that morning, as he made him promise he'd take a lunch break.
That's the only reason he's there.
"How's the suit going?" Ashido asks then, prompting Katsuki to smile again.
"Great. Hatsume is finally done with Izuku's gauntlets. I'll see her this afternoon to test them myself."
"He's going to love it," she assures him, putting a hand over his shoulder.
"I know," Katsuki mumbles, smiling down at his bento.
He can't wait to show it to Izuku. To see him wearing it.
It's going to take a while, but he'll get there eventually; he'll help Izuku fulfill his dream.
***
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the-avengers-not-the-nazis · 6 months ago
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Bad moon rising II
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Summary: After a nasty divorce, you and your family are forced to live with your Grandpa in the lovely notorious Santa Carla, California. Filled with punks, geeks, surfer nazis and apparently all kinds of creatures of the night.
Word count: 2.9k
Poly!lost boys x Emerson!reader
[1] [2] [3] [4]
A/n: I am gonna be 100% honest with all of yall, I have cried, yelled at myself, and threaten to throw my phone across the room. Because I had no idea how to get the reader and the boys to meet. So, this honestly will probably suck, but I have tried my hardest. Spent too many hours deleting and rewriting for this to be bad. So please enjoy if can
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The board walk was unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. It was packed full of bustling people, everyone wanting to go through all the rides, shops and games that they had on display. 
Lights came from all around, aluminating your way through the crowd as you tried to decide what to do first on the boardwalk. Screams and laughter sounded from the rollar coaster ride, the bumps and spins tempted you, but you knew that you’d need to ease your way into everything. 
This would be the moment when you’d wish that Sam or Micheal had come with you, they would try to do everything at once. But, unfortunately, right as you three had arrived; the boys had caught wind of a concert, ditching you to go watch Timmy Cappello perform. 
Treacherous dicks. You called them, wishing that at least one of them would have stuck with you as you ventured where you’d be spending the remainder of your summer. 
You wiped your palms against the fabric of your shorts, the heat of the night air causing a faint sheen of sweat to coat your body. After you’d finished unpacking all the necessities from the car, you’d taken a quick shower and changed for a night out on the board walk.
And thankfully so, the gentle breeze against your bare legs cooled you down enough for you to actually enjoy the night out. 
Chimming bells suddenly grasped your attention, facing the noise, you saw a small shop that was isolated from the others. One of the stores windows was cracked, a piece of cardboard covered the inside to prevent the glass from falling out. 
It was a music shop. 
You remembered when your dad would take you as a kid, letting you pick out cassette tapes, and vinyl records for your room. The old record player would run all day from how many times you would listen to Elvis, Buck Owen’s, and The mamás & the papas. 
It was such a shame that you had to sell the record player and half of your vinyl collection to help out after the divorce. With such little money, you had to make sacrifices for your family. No matter how much you regretted it afterwards.
You glanced up at the sign above the door, a wooden guitar with the words Soundscape etched into the body, swayed against the gentle breeze.  A young couple walked out of the store, hand in hand, a paper bag with their purchase held tightly as they ambled away. 
Reaching into your pocket, you felt around for your wallet. The small leather bound material felt weighted as you pulled it out, the sudden urge to spend your money caused you to open the door of the shop. 
The bell rang above you, and a quick greeting sounded from the cashier. You politely greeted him back before wandering throughout the store. 
It was decently clean, a few stray cd’s littered the ground and a couple display posters were a bit too crooked. But, overall, it was perfect for you. 
You trailed your fingers over a couple of vinyls, picking up a few before putting them back in place. Not really looking for anything specific at the moment, you just tried to find something that would catch your eye. 
Stopping infront of the cassette tapes, you let yourself go through each row, the soft clicking as the cassettes bumped against each other drifted up towards your ears. That and the sound of Jeff Lynne’s voice singing Don’t bring me down, was the only noise that filtered throughout the store. 
Your finger graced an Elvis cassette, the image of him and his infamous guitar sat in the clear case. Picking up the tape, you flipped it over reading the listed songs that went with each side. It had a couple good ones; like Blue Suede Shoes, All Shook Up, Return To Sender, Burning Love and of course some others. 
It was his top greatest hits from each album. 
You tapped the plastic against your palm, debating if you should spend the money just to add to your Elvis collection. You actually had a lot of collections that you needed to complete, but, with this specific artist you only had small handful left to find. 
Kinda like Sam’s Batman comics that he’s been trying to find at every book store that you’d passed on the way down here. 
The bell suddenly rang once more, dragging your attention away from the shelf infront of you. A group of men walked in, each leather clad and mullet wearing. The smell of smoke drifted off of them, wafting through the store. It made you scrunch your nose in disgust. 
“Welcome to the SoundScape,” The Cashier told them, the rehearsed words falling easily out of his mouth. “If you need any help, please let me know.”
None of the guys acknowledged the worker, or, they did though they just didn’t pay him any mind. You watched as they each dispersed from one another, going to different displays around the store. Picking up random items before putting them back where they originally were. 
One of the guys walked down the same row you were on, his eyes trailing over the selection of cassettes. You returned your gaze back to your own tape, not wanting to be caught staring at the guy like a creep. 
Eyeing the rack infront of you, wondering if you should buy the Elvis tape or possibly another. If you’d had enough money on you. You kept your eye on a Boney M. cassette, the item practically calling your name. You reached forward fingers less than an inch away from the plastic when a sudden commotion caused you to freeze. 
BAM!
Your head instantly shot up, the sudden noise disturbing the once peaceful silence. It came from a guy in the leathered group, the small one with curly hair, he stood over a fallen display of cd’s. His hands held up in the air, a small smug grin tugging on his lips as he turned to the stores worker. 
“I’m sorry, man.” He told him, his apologie laced with sarcasm. “It just started falling.”
The cashier let out a deep sigh, his smile turning from genuine to forced as he eyed the scattered items. “It’s alright, accidents happen.”
You watched as the curly guy bent down and picked up the stand, purposely hitting the one right beside it as he did so. He let out another fake apology before the worker shooed him away, picking up everything himself before curly messed up the entire store. 
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the movement of the blond beside you shove something in his pocket. You turned you head slightly, to get a better view, and you watched as he took another cassette from the shelf and put it on the inside of his jacket. 
You glanced between him and the other three guys that he came in with, noticing that with the worker busy they were taking items off of their display and stuffing them deep into their clothes. Hell, the curly guy was trying to fit a whole vinyl record in the front of his shirt. A very prominent square outlined for everyone to see. 
It was a diversion, knocking over enough stuff for the counter guy to get pissed and pick everything up himself. It was clever, but still wrong. 
With your attention kept on the tapes infront of you, you opened your mouth. Voice low enough so that only the blonde next to you could hear. “You shouldn’t do that.”
The man glanced up at you, not at all ashamed of what he was doing. “What’s that?”
“You shouldn’t steal.”
He let out a quiet laugh, leaning his upper body against the shelf. “Oh, really?” He asked, voice drawing out into a tease. “Wanna tell me why I shouldn’t, babe?”
You gestured to the store around you, eyes meeting his. “Because, its wrong. And, just because you and your friends can’t see that, doesn’t mean that it’s right.”
“Well, me and my friends seem to think it pretty damn fun.” He told you, pushing off the shelf as he took a few small steps towards you. “So, your reasoning is pretty much useless in this case.”
The guy stood a mere foot away from you, his eyes trailing across your face. His smile growing ever so slightly as he took you in. “So, watcha gonna do about it?” He asked, voice soft and teasing as he held a tape infront of you. 
“Put it back.”
“Why? There is no fun in doing the right thing.” He waved the item in your face. “Is there, babe?”
You snatched the cassette from his grasp, eyes not once leaving his as you placed it randomly on the shelf. “Put ‘em all back.” You scolded, voice rising ever so slightly. “It’s shitty and disrespectful for the ones that try to make a living working in places like this.”
He glanced over the top rack, eyeing the worker with disinterest. “Yeah, but, it’s also disrespectful to have to work at a place like this.” He turned back to you. “So, if he gets fired then he’ll come and thank us.”
You opened your mouth to retaliate, wanting to tell him how much his point didn’t make since. When you notice how quiet the store had gotten, the music coming from the speakers and the worker picking up the cds were the only thing. Glancing around you couldn’t see the guys friends, all of them gone from where they originally were. 
“Yeah, Paul, put it back.” A voiced suddenly called from beside you, arm slinging itself across your shoulder. 
Peering beside you, you saw the curly haired guy, his eyes dancing between both you and Paul. You didn’t even hear him come up behind you, in fact you didn’t even know that he had moved from where he was across the store. 
You pushed off his arm, the feeling of his body pressed up against your own made your face heat up. Looking back at Paul, you noticed how his body seemed to get more ecstatic, smile forming into a friendly tease. “Oh, yeah? Why don’t you put up that vinyl of yours.” He tapped against the cardboard beneath the fabric. 
Curly swatted his hand away, pulling the vinyl from beneath his shirt and dropping it on the floor. You eyed the disc on the ground, annoyance seeping into your chest at the disregard of store. 
“Pick it up.” You told the smaller one, side stepping away from them both to give yourself some room. 
He tsked, eyes roaming your body up and down. “Well, aren’t you a bossy one.”
“I wouldn’t be bossy if you’d stop fucking-“
“Watch your mouth.” A different voice spoke up, stopping you from finishing your sentence. You glanced over at the voice, taking in his long overcoat and bleach blonde hair. “It’s not nice to treat strangers that way.”
You furrowed you eyebrows, “If your saying I’m being rude, than that’s really the last thing I care about right now.”
A few small snickers came from around you, causing you to look around at each men that surrounded you. The two blondes stood the closest to you, giving you just a foot of breathing room. Then there were the the bleach blonde and brunette. They stood the furthest from you, but their stares alone were enough to make you feel like they were everywhere at once. 
Your body felt like it was on fire underneath their gazes, that and your dignity slowly burning away as realized how much of a fool you must look like right now.  You quickly crouched down, picking up the vinyl and gently setting it on the shelf. Not really caring that it’s not where it belongs right now. 
Someone cleared their throat. You and the guys turned your attention towards the worker, who stood behind the counter with a wet rag. “We’re closing.” He told them, nodding toward the door with little patience. “If your gonna buy something, now is the time.”
You gave him a quick ‘ok’, forced smile gracing your features as you turned to face the men. You eyed them wearyingly, knowing that they could just easily walk out of here without doing at all what you’ve been asking. 
A soft chuckle came from the bleach blonde, a smug smirk playing on his lips as he placed a hand on Paul’s shoulder. “C’mon, Paul.” He said, turning to walk out of the store. “Put ‘em back, we got places to be.” 
You watched as he pulled out a cd, the front of the case covered in a band called Scorpion. He set it down on the shelf, his eyes not once leaving your own. “We’ll see you around.” He muttered, voice low and mesmerizing to hear as he spoke.
It was almost like a fly getting caught in honey. Alluring and sticky, but, it’s just a trap for the prey. 
You didn’t acknowledge his words, instead you just watched as he walked out, the others slowly trailing after him. The brunette hadn’t muttered a single word since entering the store, and apparently didn’t feel the need to as he stepped outside. 
Curly slowly wandered towards the door, turning swiftly to wave his fingers at you before disappearing behind the glass. A simple ‘Have a nice night’ spilling from his lips as he did so. Paul then turned to walked out, his arm resting across your shoulder slide off. Hand coming up to pinch your nose. “Yeah, we’ll be seeing ya around.” He told you, voice indicating that it wasn’t a suggestion, but more of a promise. 
Swatting his hand away from your face, you watched as he chuckled, walking away as he went to join his friends. Leaving you all alone in the isle, with nothing but your Elvis tape and flustered face. 
Engines revved outside as you walked up to the cashier, the sound of the fading bikes meeting your ears as you tossed the cassette on the counter. The worker rang you up, placed your item in a paper bag and thanked you for your purchase. You quietly wished him good night, before turning on your heal and walking outside. 
You were quickly met with the warm night air, the loud noises coming from the boardwalk surrounded you once more. You held on tightly to the paper bag, the cassette softly rattling inside as you quickly walked away from the Soundscape. 
You were still flustered from your interaction with the four boys. The feeling of their bodies pressed up against your own made the night heat all the more unbearable. What if I would have just left them alone? You thought, swerving through a group of people that waited patiently for the carousel. 
They still would have taken from the shop, and that guy would’ve probably lost his job from all the items missing. But, you wouldn’t have lost some of your dignity whilst doing so. 
A sigh left your lips, unoccupied hand going into your jacket pocket. Though instead of the feeling of the scratchy fabric, your fingers graced against a peice of cold plastic. You stopped walking, standing by your lonesome in the middle of the boardwalk as you pulled out whatever rested in your pocket. 
It was a Scorpion cd. The same one that you saw the bleach blonde pull from his coat. You hadn’t even felt him slip the item in your pocket, was it when you were getting on to him or when he was leaving? Was he even the one that slipped it in?
Stupid prick, you thought. Stuffing the disk into the paper bag with your Elvis one, there was no sense in returning it now. The shop was already closing up and how would you even explain that to the poor worker. 
You shook your head, the events of the night tiring you out. 
From a distance you could see both Sam and Micheal standing in the middle of the boardwalk, their attention caught on a girl and little boy. You made your way over to your brothers, the paper bag swaying in your hand as your feet picked up. 
Sam greeted you when you came near, his long over coat brushing against his shoes. “He’s been following her since the concert.” He told you, gesturing with his hand towards the pretty girl. 
“Mmh, hey, peeping Tom.” You tugged on Micheal sleeve, trying to pull him away. “I’m ready to go home.”
He didn’t acknowledge you, his eyes staring longingly at the back of the girls head. You pulled once more at his arm, barely getting him to move when the sudden loud noise of multiple vehicles rushed on the boardwalk. Glancing towards the disturbance, you watched as four familiar bodies stopped infront of the girl and boy. 
They each revved their engines, purposely scaring away anyone that too close. You watched as the little boy made his way over to one of the motorcycles, the brunette pulling him up to sit behind him. 
The girl placed her arm across the bleach blondes chest, hosting herself onto the back of the motorcycle. “C’mon, man, she played you.” Sam told his brother, pulling him away from his rooted spot on the deck. You stayed put for a second, slowly trailing after your brothers as the engines of the bikes faded from earshot. 
Your mind going to when exactly you’d be seeing them again. 
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A/a/n: Like I said, this took so long to figure out how exactly the reader and the boys would meet each other. So, I honestly would understand if y'all don’t like this, but, trust me the other chapters are going to be a whole lot better.
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meyhew · 2 months ago
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ah. hm. you know what makes me insane (genuinely) is that none of these people actually gave a shit about liam unless they were punching down on him. caveat: i am not excusing his actions, not by a mile. liam died, and it hurts us. but from maya's perspective, her abuser died today, and i can understand the enormous and complicated relief of that too. so this isn't about her. but. the level of unjustified hatred he receives even in death is. yeah. it's going to make me enraged, because like. every moment spent in the public eye, liam was subjected to bullying and abuse. whether from their management back in the 1D days (yeah! i still remember that shit!) or from their "fans." like. these things don't just happen in a vacuum, people don't break because they experience five seconds of trauma and that was it. there were so many contributing factors to liam's spiral. years of abuse that had nothing to do with his ex. and no one cared! they mocked him and they will mock him still and they will celebrate his death and then when it's someone they like, they'll say "man, how can we let this happen, we need to take the warning signs seriously" like !!!! YEAH. YEAH THAT'S THE FUCKING POINT. AND NONE OF YOU DID. jesus fuck
SAY! THAT! i have not seen a single person i follow excuse anything he did to maya or anyone else. but i have seen people who have continuously looked at liam in bad faith, regardless of context, say that this is so awful and he was so young etc and it’s like. you were dog piling on him! way way way before maya henry said anything incriminating! his death is not about maya henry, his death is about him and the mistreatment and abuse he started receiving when he was a kid that went unchecked and unresolved and turned him into a kind of person he did not want to be. it’s not like he was unaware of his problems. he spoke about his addiction. he spoke about his relationships and the regrets he had and his desire to get better—he just didn’t get the help he needed!!!!!! that can happen to literally anyone. i’m not going to forgive him for his mistakes bc that’s not my place but i sure as hell can and will be bitter about people who think they can say this is a tragedy while they were actively contributing to it
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mehiwilldoitlater · 3 months ago
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If it is too much trouble could you write about Bián huá grooming Yuán Fèn after a big battle
When traveling, one gets dirty, and one doesn't have much time to clean themselves
Bajie would no doubt have fun at the youngster's expense 
"It's not necessary!"
"Yes, yes, it is. You stink." You smelled a little in your armpit; your nose frowned. "And so am I."
He looked around; the fog of the hotspring didn't give him enough visual of his surroundings, and that couldn't give you both a disadvantage in a fight. But the hot water... it was tempting.
He scratched his arm, but it was the nervousness that made him do that. To be honest, all of his body was in an itching mess, especially after your last mission.
You both had been on the road for some time, and you were returning from Yellow Wind Ridge. The sun, the bugs, the sand—you both were in need of a bath, and Yuán fèn? He needed a good grooming session. You could see the small flies jumping here and there on his furr, and trying to help himself wasn't helpful.
So, when you spotted the hotspring, you had an idea... that he regretted the moment you started to remove the upper part of your clothes.
"I can't smell anything! What if someone attacks us?!"
"Bajie is around, so it won't be a problem for now."
"I can do it by myself! I don't need you to help me with a grooming session!"
"You can't reach every part! Come on, you've been bathing with your sister when you were young!"
"That's... not the problem..." He mumbled, his cheeks and ears tinted in a soft shade of pink. You kept your top, and what it was supposed to be was a pair of boxers, so you weren't completely naked, you still had some privacy, and you immerged one foot in the warm water. 
"Off your clothes now."
"Do I have to?"
"I can't clen your back with your garmet on!" You try to reach his belt, but only to meet hair when he dodges and starts to panick.
"Okay okay! I can do it myself!"
When he finally decided to get in the water, he kept his pants on, refusing to let you see more of his exposed body. By the movements of his tail, he must have been quite nervous. Despite the protests, the complaints, and his whining, in the right moment the warm waters of the spring touched his malnourished skin, a sigh of relief emanating from him. It was true; he really needed that, but he never said that he needed your assistance!
Sitting on a rock behind him, and with the help of a comb, you started to tend to his mane and skin, trying to catch every parasite or insect that had the luck to escape from the boiling.
He said that wasn't necessary. His skin was full of scratches and deep cute from his long and sharp nails. Scabs and new cuts here and there, some knots of fur that couldn't be reached, dandruff... Unnecessary your ass! He was a mess!
"Look at you. If you needed so much, you could just ask!"
"I didn't want to delay the mission." He mumbled, trying to clean his arm from more dust and dirt. The water had some spots from what was removed from him.
"It's a noble gest, but if you end up like this, then it's not a delay at all. Here, I'll do the head now."
You helped yourself with your bowl by pouring some of the water on his head, letting him lean against your tights. You started to scratch gently with the comb his furr, freeing him from more fleas and dead hair.
"Next time, let's bring some soap. It will help. We can even take out time and stay in a bath house."
"..."
"We can even deal with the money?....I mean, how many infested bath houses can be found?"
"..."
"... Yuán fèn? Are you listening?"
Oh, how much he needed It. To the point that he completely lost consciousness. The water, the warmth, your soft skin, the head scratch... his senses were completely out. Then, you felt something, like a small vibration, coming from...
No, it couldn't be...
You brought your head nearer, avoiding sudden movements, and you felt it.
He was purring.
You had to cover your mouth to avoid to giggles and squeals for your new find out discovery.
Since when he was able to do that?! OOOHHH, how much you wish that your phone hadn't died a few days ago. After your arrival, you would love to have some videos of him like this!
You continued the session, enjoying the fact that he was literally melting in your hands. You both were completely in the moment when-
"Enjoying the evening, are we?"
Bajie's voice was cracking by the laughter of the scene. The surprise of his sudden arrival caused your fall in the water, resulting in you gasping for air and Yuán fèn losing his balance on your legs, receiving a head bump on the rock.
You all left the hotspring for the night, with Bajie making some remarks about the sweet scene that he had witnessed, Yuán Fèn that still massaged his head, and you wondering how to make that monkey purr again.
@sun-jglim
@sleepingdramaqueen
@crimsonflameproxy
@everlastingmoonlightsworld
@biankanoir
@certifiedsimpinggalorempinggalore
@cromboloni
@miraclecherryblossomsblog
@masksandfeathers
@cinnamonroll-anon
@justrandomlypassing
@cute-angi @luckyangelballoon
@dressycobra7 @naarra
@virtualexpertanchor @phoenixeclipse-lmkau
@szynkaaa @kirax-the-lazy-girl
@sleepydang @weaverworks
@kishimiest @marcu-bug
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sannasruins · 3 months ago
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you had a choice
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mark grayson x reader
type: angst, unrequited feelings, honestly idk
warnings: reader is the one with unrequited feelings, gn!reader but term "other girl" is used
a/n: i made the reader a bit more complicated in this fic, i honestly don't think they are wholly right in their approach, but are acting human and in a way i think many including myself might act. also i tried to keep to the cannon time line of season one but i haven't watched it in a few months and am basing it off the wiki so if there are any mistakes, don't at me
word count: 2.1k
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You had known Mark since the two of you were young children, with your mother being a famous superhero, she and omni-man often socialized. You would attend his birthday parties, go on play dates with him, and as the two of you got older, his house would become a refuge for you when yours was empty. The two of you would play Mario Kart and Wii Sports in his living room, ordering pizza and talking about the newest Seance Dog comic that was out.
You were there to watch him grow, and change from the Mark that you had known to the Mark that he is today. There when he had his first crush in middle school, and when your chest weirdly hurt when he told you about her, you assumed you were just jealous at the idea of him spending time with someone more than you, and that it was nothing else.
But, you became more aware of him, flushing red when he leaned in close to you to see what you were holding or to murmur a comment to you under his breath. Blushing when he complimented you on a high score in a game or congratulated you for getting a good grade on a hard test. You would try to look nice around him, wearing pretty clothes and using the expensive perfume you got for your birthday. You would laugh at every joke he made, even if they weren’t especially funny, and you always smiled when you saw him.
He never noticed all your efforts though, poor oblivious Mark.
As the two of you entered high school, you started to notice the way some other girls would look at Mark, they looked at him almost in the same way that you did. But you told yourself that they didn’t know him like you did, they were not justified in their longing gazes.
You were there for Mark, his only peer he could talk to as he struggled with his lack of powers and feelings of letting down his father. Nobody else could support him in the way that you could, and did. You understood his struggle, being the child of a super hero yourself, you had expected that one day you would have powers manifest, but they hadn’t come yet if they were going to come at all.
And you were there to celebrate when he did get his powers, jumping with joy, holding his hands and telling him how proud of him you were, and how you knew he was going to be such a great hero.
When mark met Amber, you felt something form in your stomach, it was hard and it was cold, and every time you saw him looking at her, you were made aware of its freezing presence inside of you.
When you found out that Mark had managed to get a study date with Amber, the thing in your stomach seemed to double in size, filling you with bitter iciness that you didn’t fully understand. You tried to dissuade him from the date, telling him that he doesn’t need to be worrying about dating when he just got his powers, he should be training and starting his hero reputation.
“Thank you for your advice,” he told you, “But I don’t really think you could even understand what you’re talking about, its not like you have powers to speak from experience.”
His words bit at you, and he saw the hurt on your face, and he immediately felt regret for his harsh words.
“I’m sorry,” he sighed running a hand through his dark locks, “I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that, I really like her, and you trying to dissuade me just isn’t cool with me.”
You nodded and apologized to him too, saying you’ll keep your opinion out of his choice of dates and dating.
You were there when he told you about the kiss he had shared with Amber in his bedroom, talking about how sweet and understanding she was, despite the fact that he had left her for over an hour on their date with no explanation to go save Mt. Rushmore.
You again felt the chill in your stomach spread, reaching up to wrap its way around your chest.
“That’s great Mark, I’m glad it went well.” You smiled and told him, but neither he nor really you noticed that your words weren’t truthful.
You watched as he grew closer to Amber, despite his erratic behavior with being a hero, and he would gush to you all the time about how it was going with her, and how much he liked her, and so on.
And as he went through the trials and tribulations of being both a boyfriend and a superhero, you found yourself, someone who used to spend hours upon hours with him, the person who was once closest to him, being pushed to the side, forgotten, and neglected.
He would cancel the plans the two of you had made to reschedule a date with Amber that he had missed or messed up.  
When Amber dumped him after Mark didn’t show up to volunteer at the community center because he was out saving the world and got severely injured. You were the one at his bedside, holding his hand and tearfully looking at your best friend’s bruised and battered face.
You were called by Debbie and told that he had woken up, you rushed to his side, relief flooding over you as your eyes met his, and you smiled at him and sat down on his hospital bed.
The first thing he asked you however, brought back the freezing pit that you had forgotten since he had been so badly injured.
“How’s Amber?”
Your face morphed from smile to something between shock and disgust, before you quickly fixed it back into a now forced and small smile.
“She said she dumped you for ghosting.” You answered his inquiry, not trying to sugar coat your words at all.
“What?” he asked, and his face fell.
“Mark,” you told him, your voice softening for the boy who you care so deeply for, for your best friend who you love and only want the best for, “I think maybe you should let it be. You can’t keep doing this where you’re dating someone who doesn’t understand that you have a greater purpose, and more important commitments than just them. You can’t date someone who doesn’t know that you’re Invincible.”
He looked at you angrily, “I thought we agreed that you wouldn’t comment on my relationship anymore.”
“…yeah.” You responded quietly and left his hospital room. Watching him go through this off and on, riding the seas of emotional turmoil over some high school relationship, hurt you. You didn’t want to see him struggle or be sad, he was still your best friend, at least in your eyes.
Once Mark was able to, he went to Amber and begged for forgiveness, which she for some reason granted to him. And to top it off, he then went on a weekend trip to a see a college with his once again newly reinstated girlfriend and Willaim, leaving you behind because you didn’t want to watch the two of them being together all weekend. You just told Mark that you didn’t want to fifth wheel when he invited you.
You were there when he came for you after that weekend, in incredible emotional distress, and told you about the fight he had with Amber, and that she had broken up with him again. Worst of all, he told you that he had revealed to her that he was Invincible to try to get her to understand him, in a last-ditch effort to win her back. And still after having that closely held secret told to her, and still having her turn him away.
You sat by him as he poured his heart out to you with watery eyes. But as you watched him, you felt the frigid cold in your stomach and chest spread even further, up into your throat, out into your arms, and down your legs.
“I just don’t know what to do.” He said to you weepily, “I thought she would understand if I told her, if I explained everything to her. I thought it would be alright.”
You didn’t respond and just looked at him, you didn’t know what you were feeling but it was a foreign feeling that you have never had before while looking at Mark. You felt tired, and almost apathetic.  
“I don’t know Mark.”
He continued on, rambling about how he thought he could fix it, and now how he can’t think of anything to make things better.
He turned to you after you hadn’t said anything for a few minutes, the only sound in the room being your slow breathing and his occasional sniffle.
“What’s going on with you?” he asked
“I don’t know Mark,” you said once again.
And then you got up, and walked out of your bedroom, leaving a confused Mark Grayson behind you.
You knelt frozen in front of your tv as you and most of the world watched the fight between Omni-Man and Invincible destroyed Chicago. You couldn’t tear your eyes away as you watched your best friend and his father, a man you had been close to since childhood, fought, causing death and destruction through out their super powered path. You felt horror, and selfishly, feared for Mark’s life more than anything.
You were there, when Mark awoke at the GDA hospital, sleeping on top of your folded arms that lay on his bed as you sat by his side.
You had been there for days, sitting sometimes with others who would come see him, but most of the time it was just you and Debbie, watching his swollen sleeping face, and wishing for him to wake up.
Mark looked at you, and around the room, and then back to you, with bags under your closed eyes, messy hair and most likely days old clothes.
It suddenly clicked for him, that you alone had always been there. Since a time before he could fully recall, you had been there. And here you were once again, by his side. He began to weep. Feelings of gratefulness and adoration flooded him.
You awoke slowly to the quiet sounds of Mark crying, but once you realized what the sound you were heard as, you jumped to your feet and looked at Mark. Worry morphing your face.
“Are you in pain?” you asked, quickly looking over him, as if you could find the source of his tears and presumed pain, and make them stop.
Mark reached out and grabbed your hand, and your eyes drew to his face. He shook his head.
“No, I’m not,” then he winced when you sat on the bed, shifting its weight and causing him to also shift, and added, “well maybe a little sore but that’s not what’s wrong.”
You watched him expectantly, still holding his hand, waiting for him to go on, wanting to know what was going on and how you could help fix it.
“I…” he started and stopped, clearing his throat that was rough from its lack of use and nerves, “I think I am in love with you.”
Your blood ran cold. The freeze made itself known once more, settling deep inside of you, in a place you could never take it out. It took over torso, and quickly seeped into your limbs, before finally it made its way to your head.
You pulled your hand away from his.
“What?” you asked, and though it just one word, the question came out harsh and sharp.
“I just realized now,” he explained to you, “that you’re the one that’s always been here. You’re the one who understands me. You’re the one who I need in my life, the only one able.”
You frowned at him, “So, I’m the most convenient? The one who is content with being push to the side, so you can prioritize other things? Who already knows who you are, what you are, so you don’t have to explain to the next girl you date?”
“No no no,” he shook his head, looking desperate to get his point across, “that’s not what I mean at all.”
“Forget it Mark,” you told him, standing up from his bed and taking a step back. “You were too busy loving another girl to notice that I was there, loving you.”
He looked at you, distress showed on his damaged face.
“I didn’t know,” he half whispered dejectedly.
“I’m pretty sure it was obvious Mark, if you ever once looked my way and actually truly saw me, and the way that I looked at you.”
You sighed and shook your head.
“It’s too late Mark. You had a choice, and you chose wrong.”
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sonotkari · 4 months ago
Text
Saturn
Hanni Pham x Fem Reader
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[ Synopsis ]
Listening to Saturn by Sza has made you think about many things since your last (not-so) relationship, and Hanni is on your side, listening to you yapping your thoughts.
Fluff, Angst, and a tiny bit of cursing :)
[ Word Count ]
1.5k yes it's very very short :(
[ a/n ]
I've been listening to a lot of songs lately and the idea just popped out when I was listening to Sza! It's really cheesy like, really, might be too tacky but oh well :P My first time writing this kind of stuff so it's a mess but do please take it easy on me guys /ᐠ。ꞈ。ᐟ\ (i suck at writing honestly)
I hope someone out there likes it dis for u bae <3
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You've spent your entire year, loving someone. As the "giving it all" type of persona when it comes to relationships even when it's as small as a crush, you really gave it your all. Praising them the chance you got to, making sure to spend lots of quality time together, presenting gifts for no particular reason just because you enjoyed seeing the smile that appeared on their face with the cute little dimple on their cheeks which was one of the many things you liked- no, loved about them.
But maybe it was a little too much or perhaps it was something else. You eventually got tired of pursuing them after a year. Feeling more and more drained as the days passed and feeling that both of your distances hadn't moved an inch, you were debating a lot with yourself. Mixed signals were everywhere but you just couldn't let them go that easily. Like you were stuck in quicksand, trying to get out of it but as you do, you just sink in deeper. Might as well let it sink in and disappear. 
That was all a year ago, and you were now outside by the beach. Sat by the white sand as you admired how beautiful the waves were even at nighttime. Saturn by Sza was playing on your headphones as you looked up at the dark sky, admiring the little stars you could barely see while the sound of waves was also in the background with the music. 
If Karma's really real
How am I still here? 
Just seems so unfair 
I could be wrong tho
If there's a point to being good
Then where's my reward?
The good die young and poor
I gave it all I could 
The lyrics hit you hard, earning a bit of a chest pain as you couldn't relate to it more than ever. All the fun memories you had together flooded your mind as you listened to the music. Going to dates where she mostly wanted to go, having late-night calls and talking about almost everything that was going on with your life to each other, all the stupid jokes and the bickering where your friends couldn't take it anymore and the two of you would just laugh it all off.
You had to lose it all. Sometimes you wonder if you've made the wrong decision to let go. Regret washes your entire mind and soul as your tears start flowing non-stop every midnight, reminding you of all of the beautiful memories you just had to trash out because of the choice you made. But as much as you felt all the joy and the happiness of the world when you were with her, it began to change into pain. Pain that you wouldn't have imagined stinging so much that you eventually had to make a choice to let go and leave. 
Taking a big deep breath, you felt someone's presence come and sit beside you. You smile softly at her as you take off your headphones, letting them hang on your neck for a while as you can hear small music leaking from them. 
"What are you doing here at this time?" 
"Just admiring the view while having some fresh air" 
"You sound like a romantic" 
Hanni snorted a bit as she looked at the view in front of her. The small cold breeze hits both of you smelling a hint of sea salt passing by as well.
"I thought you were crying again" 
"Stop reminding me, it's embarrassing" 
You laugh a bit at what Hanni had just said and remember the time when she decided to crash into your apartment with snacks in her hand but instead caught you crying in your room alone with crumpled tissues scattered everywhere. You were a total mess at that time and the image still creeps into your mind, sending a shiver and an uneasy wave of embarrassment down your spine every time you remember them. 
"I was thinking of her, though..." 
Thoughts linger on about her once again as you start to daze off from the beach view. 
What if I didn't let go of her? Would we still be talking, laughing at each other like we always do, or would I be in a crying mess again? 
We used to joke around, laughing non-stop at almost everything, now all I do is cry non-stop instead. I sometimes wonder, if I had enough courage in me and talked about my feelings about her, we might've done something about it together.
 I wonder if she thinks about me like I do. Has she ever cried about me? I feel bad if I ever made her cry. Not like I can do something about it now. 
I wish I could, but I think it'll just hurt me again. Because I'll be giving her my all again and I'll be stuck in a loop then. 
You snapped out when you finally noticed you were rambling your thoughts to Hanni without even noticing. 
"Sorry..." 
"Don't be"
Hanni shifted her gaze, locking them at yours as she smiled warmly. You would always feel reassured every time you see that smile of hers. Perfectly warm for a cold breezy night. You could see the stars clearly by now and the moon peaking from the thin clouds, the light shimmering as it reflects on the surface of the water, and a bit of music that's still playing from your headphones, going to the end of the chorus. 
Find something worth saving 
It's all for the taking 
I always say 
I'll be better on Saturn 
None of this matters 
Dreaming of Saturn 
You listen to the lyrics and think if it'd be actually nice on Saturn. Even if it wasn't as far as Saturn, just somewhere you could ease your mind without all the lingering thoughts that wrapped you around like a thorned bush, pricking your soul. 
"Saturn sounds nice" 
The girl stares at you with a hint of confusion in her eyes as you suddenly, out of the blue, talk about planets. 
"I'm so fucked up on this planet, might as well just go to Saturn you know?" 
You never know, being in Saturn might be better than you think. Far away from the problems you've left behind, no one chasing you down for it. I'll make Saturn a place where I could rest from heart, just carefree and mindless. No more pain or hurt. Just focusing on myself and the future ahead of me. I bet I could make the best planet in the universe if NASA would let me. Well, that would be valid if we could "land" on Saturn in the first place without burning and melting ourselves. 
You outed a chuckle as you yapped your thoughts of Saturn to Hanni and the girl couldn't help but laugh lightly at your sudden plans about making the "best planet in the universe" 
But deep down, you knew that even when you'd send yourself off to Saturn or even as far away as Neptune, you'd somehow think about the girl just like how you've been lingering your thoughts on her on a random night at the beach. You take a deep breath, stopping thinking about it for once when you hear her speak up in a quiet mumble. 
"I'll be your Saturn." 
It was your turn to look at the girl with confusion and surprise. Your eyes met once again as she showed that warm smile with a soft chuckle. 
"Sorry, that just sounded cheesier way more than I imagined"
Your thoughts wander again. 
Hanni had been with you from your first-ever crush to your first-ever relationship (even when it was complicated as hell) till your heartbreaking moments. She was the one who you'd open up to when it came to opinions and bits of advice, she's the one you'd tell firsthand about every exciting thing that happened to your life, the one you'd update even when it was 3 am early in the morning, and her shoulders were the ones you cried and leaned on when your heart was shattered to pieces.
Being with Hanni allowed you to be idiotic, to be yourself. No matter how bad the situations were or how stupid things could get when with her, you could just laugh it all off and be carefree. You'd forget all your worries and problems, and the time with her would fly so fast. You remember way back then, you'd repeatedly ask Hanni's mom if she could stay a bit longer. You feel all the comfort you need when you're with her. 
"You already are"  
Her facial expression turned into a surprised one as she heard your response. The music leaking from your headphones had finally come to an end, only the sound of waves in the background left as you gave back the warm smile she always wears to reassure you, letting you forget all the problems and weight on your shoulders. 
"You are my Saturn" 
After some time of staring at each other, the long comforting silence soon ended with soft giggles and laughs as you and Hanni looked back at the ocean view with the golden moon and diamond stars shining their way making everything a perfect picture. 
"You were right... that did sound cheesier than I imagined" 
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no way I just fkn finished this wait what
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murdockparker · 19 days ago
Text
Roses and Regrets - Part 3
Anthony Bridgerton x Reader
Summary: Lady Barlow returns to Bridgerton House for tea, a mystery is solved.
Word Count: 3.5k
Warnings: enemies to lovers, flashbacks
A/N: sorry for the hiatus! here's pt 3 to make up for it my loves!! also, the tag list has been closed! so sorry
first part - previous part - next part
“You look radiant, my dear.”
She picked at the feather atop her head—it was drooping a bit too much for her liking. “Do you really think so?”
“Should Lady (Y/L/N) have been here to see it,” the older lady sighed, tears almost dotting her eyes, “why, she would be the most proud of you.”
Her mother had passed only last year, delaying (Y/N)’s entrance to society. Mourning came easily, she had found. The black attire, the dreary expression, the love lost. Lord (Y/L/N) nearly forced his daughter into the Mart last year, but, given the prying eyes of the ton it was best to wait a few short months. 
She didn’t know how freeing those months truly were. 
“What if I forget how to dance?” (Y/N) asked, turning to face her family’s maid—Mary. “Perhaps I fall on my face, or, perhaps I step on a suitor’s toes?”
Mary smiled kindly, head tilted in affection. “You have had wonderful teachers in that regard, I do not believe you have any reason to step on a suitor’s toes.”
“But what if I do?”
“You will not,” Mary reminded her. “And perhaps you do? If they are truly a gentleman, they will not mention such a thing.”
“Truly?”
“One may hope.”
“Mary!”
“Oh, miss, tonight is not about dancing anyhow,” Mary laughed, straightening the feather on the young lady’s head. “You will present yourself to the Queen as an eligible woman to be wed, she will judge you accordingly—”
“I am to be judged by the Queen?” (Y/N) quickly turned around. “Oh my God—I truly do not wish to go now!”
Mary sighed. “Miss, it is just how things are done. I know your mother is not here to explain the comings and goings, but… after this evening, I pray you find a suitable gentleman to court you and you will be engaged before season’s end. You will have little to worry about the Queen judging you if you become half of a suitable match.”
“And if I do not have a suitable match?”
Mary pursed her lips. “Well… then you hope another coupling takes the Queen’s attention from you.”
“These rules,” (Y/N) scoffed. “With my luck, I get married off by the end of the season—at least I’ll be free from my father.”
“Let us fix up your hair, hm?” Mary said quickly. “We have a Queen to impress!”
It was just as miserable as she assumed it would be, waiting outside of the door to be seen by the Queen, the one who will judge her worthiness to every eligible bachelor in the ton, the one who will give her an out from a life with her horrid father. 
“Miss (Y/N) (Y/L/N), presented by her father, the admirable Lord (Y/L/N).”
The great doors opened, an aisle leading directly to the Queen and her band of merry onlookers, each eye judging her entrance with a balanced caution. Lord (Y/L/N) stood a bit straighter, his hand wringing tighter on his daughter’s arm.
“Do not make a mess of us,” he warned quietly.
Her breath caught in her throat. A silent acceptance. 
The Queen’s eyes lasted only a moment on her before waving her off for the next young lady, not a true dismissal, but not a smile.
Average, her father called her. 
A disappointment, he said.  
She tried her best to avoid his gaze the rest of the evening. 
What she didn’t know, however, is that one gaze in particular was trained on her nearly the whole time. 
She had tea with Lady Bridgerton twice a week. It was a good habit to have. It was nice to have friends, now adding Lady Danbury to her little circle during these teas. She never had many friends growing up, nor many in her short time in the season, the closest she got to true friendships were with Lord Barlow’s friends wives, but those women were nearly always out of touch and hard to be friendly with. One time, Lady Whitehill insulted her for wearing white to her ball—the theme being black and white—that was enough for her to feign the friendship and keep to herself. 
She grew to know a few of the Bridgerton children during her visits. Hyacinth and Gregory, the rambunctious bunch that they were, usually brought a smile to the young dowager viscountess’ face. Just last week, the pair put a toad in their older sister’s tea cup—Eloise nearly shattered the entire tea set in shock. A fun family, she had decided, one she nearly didn’t loathe to be around entirely. All but one member, of course.
He kept to himself, she had found. Whether that had been on purpose or a mere coincidence, she never really knew. Anthony Bridgerton made himself scarce during tea time, the mention of him only in passing and rarely—if ever—by his siblings. If she put money on it, Violet had something to do with it, a keen eye she had for the world around her—especially when that world was seemingly revolved by her eight rambunctious children. 
“Anthony has been rather cross lately,” Hyacinth spoke up between biscuits. “Mother, do you know why?”
Violet gave her youngest a trying look. “Darling, we have a guest.”
“Oh it is just Lady Barlow,” Hyacinth admonished, nearly gulping her tea. Decorum was through the window during these less formal gatherings. “She is practically family at this point, is she not?”
“I am flattered you think so highly of me,” (Y/N) said sweetly, giving Hyacinth an equally sweet smile. “But I do think your mother is right—” 
“Are we supposed to never talk of him when she’s around?” Hyacinth looked to her mother. “It’s a foolish thing—”
“Hyacinth!” 
“Oh, Lady Bridgerton, it is fine,” (Y/N) said, finally finishing her own cup of tea. “He’s your son, her brother, I do not expect you to cease speaking of him for my sake. It is kind of you for requesting such a thing.” 
“What?” Hyacinth nearly laughed. “It wasn’t Mama’s request—Anthony asked we didn’t speak of him when you were around. Of course, he wished you would not be around—”
“Hyacinth Bridgerton!” Violet stood up, her anger shooting to the ceiling. Why, one may have thought that it could have cracked the moulding clean off. “Retire to your bedchambers.”
“Mama.” 
“Now, Hyacinth,” Violet nearly scolded. Her voice never raised to a shout, but the tone was commanding all the same. The practice and talent of a mother.
The youngest Bridgerton hopped off of the lounge and huffed towards the entrance to the drawing room, a staff member opening the door for her. 
“I am terribly sorry for her behavior,” Violet tried to laugh it off, but the clear look on her face told an entirely different story. “She is the greatest gift, but also the biggest challenge of my eight, I fear…”
“Her candidness is charming,” (Y/N) said. “She will be a fine young lady, I am sure.”
“Once she learns to hold her tongue, I fully agree,” Violet sank back onto the lounge. “Please do not mind her words, she hardly knows of what she speaks.”
(Y/N) laughed, flattening her skirt to try and appear busy. “It is no secret that your son and I share a bit of an aversion towards one another, she was only speaking the truth.”
“Whatever my son has done to upset you, I fully apologize for that as well.”
“You must cease apologizing for your children, Violet,” (Y/N) said, nearly tired of the topic. “Your youngest daughter is one thing, I will give you grace with that, but your son is a man—you must not make apologies for whatever he has done.”
Violet shifted in her seat. “I do apologize quite often for my children, do I not?” A small laugh escaped her lips. “Goodness… I fear that is all I have been doing as of late.”
Lady Barlow joined in on the laugh. “A mother’s job is never ending, I fear.”
“But my son,” Violet said, her voice teetering on nosy. “He hasn’t… done anything untoward?”
“I rather think this is a sensitive topic for tea.”
“Right,” Violet shook her head. “Apologies, I just want to make sure he was on his best behavior.”
“Lord Bridgerton? On his best behavior?” She nearly barked a laugh. “Oh Violet, you jest.”
Violet chuckled. “I suppose it was a foolish thing to say, yes."
“Speaking of foolish things,” (Y/N) sighed. “I believe the time in which Lord Bridgerton has allowed me to be in your home is up for the day.”
Violet forced a smile. “You and I both know that your presence is welcome here anytime.”
“I find it so enlightening that you think that, Violet.”
“Brother, if you stare at that cover any longer, you may just set it aflame.”
Anthony tore his gaze from the red book atop his desk. He had planned on balancing various accounts for the estate that afternoon—Benedict ruined all concentration the moment he burst through the study doors. Mumbling on about the academy and his strife, the woes of a second son. 
“I was not staring,” Anthony said, shifting a few papers to cover the book. “You simply made me lose my rhythm.”
“Rhythm,” Benedict hummed, barely moving from his seated position. “Rhythm of what? Modiste bills?”
“Actually,” Anthony laughed airily, “yes. It seems Mother has taken a great deal to get Eloise proper dresses this season.”
“Oh? How much in silk and other fabric has she paid?” Benedict peered closer to the desk, as if he was trying to read Anthony’s parchment. 
“Too much,” Anthony said lowly. “I shall speak to her tonight.”
“Speak to her you shall,” Benedict agreed, fingertips dancing on the wood of his elder brother’s workspace. “As if Eloise needs the finest silks, it is not as if she will make a match this season.”
Anthony furrowed his brow. “She will make a fine match.”
“This season? Brother, you are more likely to secure a wife than Eloise a husband this season,” Benedict pointed.
“A fine match one day,” he corrected. 
“Speaking of your match,” Benedict said, his voice nearly a song. In nearly a blink, he snatched the red book from under the carefully placed parchments, holding the cover up closer for inspection. “Perhaps that is the reason you’ve taken up reading poetry?”
“Give that back,” Anthony rose from his chair, hand stretched outwards, the other on his hip. 
“No, I do not think I will,” Benedict said, a giggle following his words. “I did not take you for the poetry type, Brother. I recall numerous conversations in which you regarded the literature as ‘a waste of perfectly fine paper.’”
“I still feel the same,” Anthony reached further over the desk, trying to reach his brother. “Benedict, I will not ask again.”
“Is the viscount hiding something from his dear baby brother?” Benedict cooed, holding the text closer to his chest. “I cannot think of any other reason you’d have poetry in your study if not to gain favor of a lady.”
“As if I would stoop low enough to learn any poetry to woo a lady,” Anthony scoffed. “I am simply enough as I am for most ladies in the mart—they are the ones who have to convince me of a match.”
“The perks of a title,” Benedict sighed, lowering the book to his hip. “Still, I did not take you for a poetry man.”
“Colin was blabbering about ‘expanding my horizons’,” Anthony lied. “All that travel surely has gotten to his head.”
“So you chose to start reading poetry?”
“Why must you act like it is the most foolish thing?” 
“Because it is the most foolish thing,” Benedict barked a laugh. Reluctantly, he set the book into Anthony’s still open hand. “But, if it has been bringing you bliss… who am I to argue?”
His fingers scratched against the leather of the cover, his heartbeat slowing the second he had the text in his hands. “I wouldn’t call it bliss.”
“Nor would I,” Benedict groaned. “Of all the poets to choose from, you picked up a copy of Byron’s bumbling. Truly, if you wanted recommendations on the subject, you need not ask, I am more than willing to assist.”
Anthony looked closer at the cover, as if his hours of staring at the text had done him any good, his brother was right, it was a collection of poems by Lord Byron. “I recall you mentioning the name,” he lied, quite easily, “I thought it was a recommendation in good faith.”
Benedict pressed a hand to his chest. “Then you have not been listening to me at all!”
“Forgive my transgression,” Anthony sat back down, his attention turning back to his papers, politely trying to ignore the fact he had not placed the book back onto the desk—the leather-bound book still tight in his grip. 
“I could do you a favor, you know,” Benedict smirked. “Throw it right into the fire—it ought to make good kindling. Frankly, the only thing it’s good for, I fear.”
“No,” Anthony said a tad too quickly. He feared Benedict looking too terribly deep into the matter, so he composed himself just as fast. “I borrowed this copy, it must be returned.”
“Borrowed?” Benedict quirked his brow. “From whom?”
“Mr. Mondrich said a patron left it behind,” Anthony began to lie, his breathing even. “But I should return it soon, lest the owner comes back for it soon.”
Benedict scoffed, finally standing up and readjusting his coat. “I fear you’d be doing the owner a favor, then.”
“Should you not be heading out for the Academy?”
His younger brother nearly groaned. “Yes, probably.”
“You should probably get on that, then,” Anthony said, pointing to the door of the study. “We pay a fine tuition and I would hate for that money to go to waste on your need to be so flippant on the matter.”
“You certainly are no fun these days,” Benedict said, making his way to the back of the study. He opened the door hastily before turning back to look at Anthony. “Perhaps you should hasten to find a wife, so she could pull that stick out of your—”
“Leave.”
His brother’s laughter peeled away from the study, finally escaping to head off to his other duties of the day. Anthony felt like he could finally breathe, his shoulders falling and the book in his hands now feeling lighter than before, his grip not so deadly on the tome. He could feel every muscle in his body relaxing, nearly pleased he could finally go back to his stack of papers, all needing signatures and the like.
“You!” 
Anthony’s head snapped back to his study door—Benedict had left it wide open in his exit. Standing in the entryway was a one Lady Barlow, dressed in a sage green dress, a matching ribbon dangling from her hair—she had finally and wholly retired the mourning attire, it seemed. “Me? What are you doing here?”
“You stole my book!” She pointed, stepping into the study with a hurried pace.
“You did not answer my question,” Anthony pressed. “What are you doing here?”
“Why do you have my book?”
He slammed the red leather book against the surface of his desk. “This book is none of your concern—your only concern should be related in leaving my estate with the utmost haste.”
“It seems to be entirely my concern,” she argued. “And I was leaving—had tea with your mother as I’m sure you’re well aware—until I saw my property in your hands.”
“It is very unladylike to accuse me of stealing your book—”
“I never used the word steal,” she crossed her arms, taking more space in the study, getting closer to his desk. Her eyes narrowed, obviously trying to read the cover or spine of the book. “But it is rather convenient that you happen to have a book that is identical to the one I lost…”
“Loads of books look alike,” Anthony challenged, crossing his own arms in defiance. 
“Did I mention I seemed to have misplaced this particular book,” she quickly clawed at the desk to swipe the book up, “the very day we had our spat in the park? And now you seemingly have it in your possession?”
His mouth gaped like a trout, nothing but a puff of air passing his lips.
“I knew you were an unsavory man, Lord Bridgerton,” (Y/N) said, pulling the book to her chest—nearly afraid he’d take it back from her. “But I never thought you’d be a right thief, too.”
“I was planning on returning it,” Anthony said softly, so soft it was a wonder that anyone heard him at all. “Honestly. I just—”
“Just what?”
His brows pulled together, Anthony could practically feel his internal temperature rising. “Must you accuse me of such a crime when I was only meaning to do the right thing?”
“The right thing was stealing my book?”
“I did not steal your book!” He spat. 
Her laughter was hollow, her face contorted in disbelief. “Oh? So you just happened to have it?” 
“You were foolish enough to forget your own belongings,” Anthony stepped around his desk, getting closer to her. “You left it behind, you were neglectful of your possessions.” He boldly pressed a finger to her shoulder, poking her with every inflection of his voice. “I simply planned on returning it to you, being the gentleman I am.”
His finger felt like a brand against her skin, hot and sizzling, even over the fabrics of her green sleeves. She couldn’t tell what was feeling more heated, her cheeks or the patch of skin beneath his touch—all heated from anger, of course. “It has been more than a fortnight since our time in the park, you could have returned it at any time.”
“Is that what I should have done? Return the book, only for you to accuse me of stealing it?” Anthony tilted his head, removing his hand from her shoulder. “No,” he clicked, “that would be entirely too unreasonable, would it not?”
(Y/N) pressed the book closer to her chest. A beat of silence. “I do not appreciate your sarcasm.”
“Imagine how much I appreciate your accusation, then,” Anthony quipped, albeit softer than his previous comments.
She deflated, wilted like a flower in a drought. “Perhaps I was a bit crass.” 
“Perhaps I should have made a greater effort to return your book.”
“Perhaps,” she coughed, looking down at the ground. “Perhaps I should not have entirely jumped down your throat with such an accusation.”
“Perhaps not,” Anthony said, cracking a hint of a smile. 
“Perhaps we cease the use of the word ‘perhaps’?” (Y/N) said playfully, her smile matching his own.
A sigh of relief, a breath of fresh air filled his lungs. “Perhaps we should.”
She nodded, her grip loosening on her book just a bit. “Perhaps.”
“For what it’s worth,” Anthony said softly, fighting his grin from becoming much larger. “I am sorry, for not returning your book right away. You’ve been a welcome guest in this home many time since then, I really had no excuse.”
“I wouldn’t say I’ve been a ‘welcome’ guest,” (Y/N) said, a bit of bite to her words. She swallowed them quickly. “Of course, I do appreciate you allowing me my friendship with your mother. Even if that’s not something we necessarily needed…”
“It’s difficult for you to accept an apology, isn’t it?”
“From you?” A laugh escaped her. “Of course. It’ll take a lot more than just a few words for me to forgive your transgression. But, I appreciate having my book back all the same.”
“Is that a thank you?” Anthony crossed his arms.
“I am not sure,” she said, turning on her heels. “Is that an apology?”
She had already begun to walk away, but Anthony could’ve sworn he saw her cheeks lifting, a smile tinting her voice.
Returning to the Barlow Estate, (Y/N) held onto her book as if it was the most precious piece of literature in the world, almost as if it were a copy from the royal archives and the like. She wasted no time to return it to her own library, a small collection of tomes and books in her bedchambers, unlike the large expanse of books in the drawing room just a floor below.
She peeled open the cover, her fingers rubbing over the inscription on the inside. Her mother's name, written in the finest of penmanship on the top corner.
She realized, he could have left the book in the park, if she had truly left it behind. He could have allowed the changing weather ruin the perfectly good text, let someone else take it for themselves. And while he had many an opportunity to return the book, he was the head of his family, a busy man, after all.
Perhaps Lord Bridgerton wasn't as uncouth as she once assumed.
Perhaps.
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apricitae-world · 1 month ago
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MAKE UP TO YOU
XAVIER'S "FLUFF ATTACK" INSPIRED FANFIC; F!MC AND M!XAVIER;
The following post has sexual content! Includes: kissing, praise kink, nipple teasing, oral (f! and m! receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, semi-public sex. All characters in this fanfic are consenting adults. Proceed carefully and do not attempt to recreate these situations in real life.
If you would like to help me keep posting content like this, consider tipping me on Ko-Fi!
This is my first smut fanfic and comments are appreciated!
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To be fair, it took you a second too long to notice Xavier went missing. There were so many beautiful cat butlers around you, fighting for your attention until your vision was crowded with car ears and tails.
They weren't what (or who) you were looking for. But no matter how many times your eyes scanned the room, the messy blond hair of your lover was nowhere to be seen. Where could he be?
Your train of tought was interrupted when another fluffly head plopped beside you. A young man with black fur looked intensely into you, approaching very slowly.
"Sorry, I'm not interested." This was not the first (and you suspected not the last) time a cat paced around the room looking for attention. It was your idea to have this kind of date with Xavier, but now you regretted it terribly.
The man's fluffy ears went down, and he quietly got up to be somewhere else. You sighed in relief. Why wasn't Xavier with you? Did he find a caretaker he liked more for this event? The tought made you sad.
You get up and try to sneak outside. The afternoon sun greets your skin in a pleasant way, and the chirp of birds is a nice change of pace compared to the consistent buzz of the ar conditioner.
Soft sunrays illuminate a head you know very well. He was hidding behind a big bush full of flowers, and you almost didn't see him if not for the lovely tail creeping behind it.
"Hello, Xavier. I was looking for you." His ears flicked like butterflies. He definitely heard you, but didn't turn around. Was he... upset?
"Why are you out here? Too many people inside?" You gently run your hands through his lower back, creeping up until you squeeze his shoulders and reach his new cat ears. Your fingertips explore the skin from base to tip, and Xavier shudders.
"Oh." He begins. "So now you remember to be gentle with my ears." The puzzle pieces begin to fall into place. Right at the beggining of the evening, you might had tugged at his ears a little too strongly.
You mutter a "oh, no" and your caresses stop. When your lover turns around, his blush spreads from his cheek to beneath his collarbones. Tail moving like a whip behind him, he inquiries:"We don't stop halfway when it comes to these things, right?"
"If I pet your ears the way you like, will you forgive me?" A smile creeps on his face. He positions closer to you and lowers his head. "I am sorry for tugging at your beautiful ears earlier, babe" He almost headbutts your hand and comes closer. "You are so cute like this I lost my sense of strenght." He is gasping in your hold. "Can I make up to you?"
"Yes. Yes yes please." His hand finds yours, and they slowly travel to his chest. You snuggle your palm between his pecs and he moans quietly. You look down for a moment and see his hard-on through his breefs.
"Can my lovely cat butler answer me something?" You move your fingers slightly to the side and find his erect nipples. You gently tease them through his shirt while he gasps, pupils overpowering the blue in his eyes. "Where you jealous?"
Xavier gags. "No." He tries to distract you by reaching under your own shirt. Desire was already pooling in your lower stomach since you heard his beautiful sounds.
"Then why did you run away? Did I neglect my most precious butler?" He stops and you use this as an opportunity to run your hands lower, holding his waist. "Y-your most precious? Don't you have others?" There is no bite behind his question, just hurt.
"Can I tell you a secret?" You palm at his erection. "You're my favorite." He moans louder this time. "And I can show you."
In the blink of an eye, you remove his pants and bend down. "Oh God, right there..." He guides your head as you give kitten licks across his shaft. You moisture the slick and saliva before attempting to put his lenght in your mouth.
"I don't want you to spend time with the other stupid cat butlers anymore." He hiccups every time you suck his dick and there are tears trailing down his eyes. "I want you to be with me and only me." He gives a few shallow thrusts in your mouth and reaches his peak.
"Okay." You reply after (almost) recovering your voice and your breath. In a second, you are wrestled to the ground and feel a hot mouth on yours. Xavier rubs his angry pink erection on your stomach, still seeking relief.
He tries to grind onto you and lower your pants at the same time. As graceless as that may be, he is holding your thighs and approaching your soaking core in no time. "I want to taste my favourite thing too."
You scream when he begins to eat you out. His saliva and your juices make wet slurping sounds echo through the garden. He insistently runs his tongue flat both against your entrance and your clit. You won't last long if he keeps going like this.
"Xavie, you're still hard. You don't have to do this if you don't wan-" He interrupts you by making out fervorously with your pussy. You look into his eyes and he sucks on your clit when you do.
You explode in his mouth and he drinks it like it's the air he needs to breathe. There's no way of being sure wich way is up or down while you ride the waves of your orgasm.
"Can we go one more? I need you." His erection nudges you. Both your lips meet gently this time, but that too becomes desperate as you cling to each other.
"Yes. I would never deny my star anything." He lines up at your entrance and gathers moisture from your release. His head slowly enters and you're already out of breath. "You're so special to me, you know that?"
Halfway. There's a drop of sweat running through your forehead. "You feel so good missed you so much wanna fuck you so bad." He mumbles as he tries not to go all the way in one thrust. Your heat envelops him so deliciously.
"I need you too, Xavier. So hurry up and just-" You meet his thrust and he bottoms out with a groan. "So full. Wanna be so good for you!"
He begins to move and there are stars under your eyelids. "I also have to tell you a secret." He confesses. His deft fingers run to your clit and begin playing with it.
"You're my favorite too." Relief washes over you. Of course Xavier loves you and vice versa, but hurting him is the last thing on your mind, even if inevitable.
"No going away." He commands. "I want you to feel this. To be here all the time with me". He is being such a bully, cock nuzzled deep inside and trying to split you in half. The way he kisses and sucks every patch of skin he can find is such a contrast to what you two are doing.
"My star, I'm close-" He gasps and digs his hands on your hips to ground himself. "Can I finish inside?"
"Yes, come inside. I want you to fill me up!" The tought and Xavier's thrust are also sending you over the edge quicker than what you would like to admit. His dick twitches for the last time and your insides are painted white.
The feel of his release pumping inside is the last push it takes for you to reach your second orgasm. Both of you scream as your peak flows through.
When you regain your senses, Xavier's body is coiled around you like a snake. His tail is also holding one of your legs in place. You hear soft snores coming from the person beside you, and his temperature is slightly warmer than yours.
"Xavier? My love, we have to get up." His ears flicker like butterflies, but he doesn't open his eyes. "It's already night."
Stars shimmer above you. It is possible to discern some constellations, even close to Linkon's city pollution. "We can take a nap at home." That seems to be a good enough argument for Xavier, since he opens his eyes and carries you in his arms in a flash.
"I can't believe inviting you for a nap is the best way for you to do something." He quirks his eyebrows in a mischievious way. "I can also be persuaded with snacks."
Of course.
Even if, eventually, you will have to go back to your life in Linkon, and Xavier won't have his beautiful cat features anymore, you are sure your relationship is stronger because of the moments you shared. As long as you can figure out what to do. Together.
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wiisagi-maiingan · 5 months ago
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I love watching youtube videos about tiktok and influencer drama, mainly because I'm completely disconnected from stuff like that (I have never watched an influencer video in my life) so it gives me the thrill of true crime without the tragedy exploitation aspect, but sometimes I also feel completely disconnected from the youtubers too?
Like every youtuber has to offer up a million disclaimers about how they aren't judging influencers or whatever and that's usually fine but like. I do feel that there ARE points where people need to be judged for the content they're sharing and promoting and profiting off of!
"I'm not judging tradwives or saying their content is bad—" I am!! I am absolutely judging tradwives! Extremely harshly! Because the entire "tradwife" movement is conservative propaganda based on misogynistic and patriarchal ideas about history with no basis in reality or in our modern world! And tradwife influencers explicitly target young women and especially teen girls and try to convince them to put their entire lives in the hands of their husbands, which is a horrific recipe for domestic abuse!
These women making hundreds of thousands of dollars off tiktok videos (and often coming from extremely wealthy families) are out here telling young girls that they don't need an education, that they don't need their own income, that if they're just pretty enough and obedient enough then they'll find a rich husband and never have to worry about anything ever and it's fucking scary! And I don't know why we are tolerating it!
We know what happens when people, especially women, give up complete control to their partners. We know what that leads to, resentment and extreme control and total lack of options when things go from totally fine to constant arguing to violence. These influencers, who ARE making extremely significant personal incomes from their jobs as influencers online, lie through their fucking teeth about how perfect it is that their husbands do everything for them and all they have to do is take care of the kids and home (with the help of nannies and housekeepers and personal chefs off-screen. . .) and about how they've escaped from capitalism, meanwhile the people actually in those situations who AREN'T making all that extra cash are either already in abusive relationships or they're in incredibly precarious positions where they could end up abused or thrown out with nothing in an instant.
I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to be a homemaker or stay-at-home parent. I don't think it's wrong to not want to go to college or have a 9-5.
But you NEED options. You need full access to your own money that can't be monitored or controlled by a partner. You need access to a vehicle. You need a life outside of your home and family, especially friends who are willing and able to help you if needed. You need the ability to survive on your own in some way. Because if and when things go wrong in the relationship, THOSE are the things that will save your life.
Also remember that again, these tradwives DO have jobs and their jobs involve selling a fake lifestyle and fake ideals. They are getting paid BIG TIME for the shit they peddle to you, whether that's through the millions of views they get (both from genuine fans and from haters, the algorithm doesn't know or care about the difference) or the many sponsorships they get, they have incomes that they are not disclosing. They have help that they are not disclosing. Many of them started out with extreme wealth but lie through their teeth and cosplay as fucking homesteading peasants. It's all a lie to sell shit to you. Don't buy it.
Disclaimer: Please do not nitpick this post, it's very late and I'm ranting and if this leaves my circle of followers I will regret it deeply. Be nice. Tradwives dni, you're all annoying.
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dilys-min · 2 months ago
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Aeipathy
Pairing: Yan!Chrollo Lucifer x Reader
Warnings: Yandere, Unhealthy relationship, Obsession, etc.
Word count: 2500+ words
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For many things, Chrollo has never regretted the path he had taken.
He himself, like a phantom, exists only on the verge of hushed rumors and whispers of others, if there was anyone lucky enough to be alive to tell the tale after an encounter with the Troupe. To be vulnerable means to be seen, and to be seen will allow you to be hunted. Maybe that’s why he had chosen such a befitting title for the Troupe for it is only common for a phantom to remain in the dark, committing atrocities without the knowing of others.
He had thought that the picture that he had meticulously painted since the time when his name is the only thing he owns, a picture in which he is the greatest villain, spreading terrors to those who dare to cross paths with him or the Troupe, would last until the end of time. Or so he had thought, until you came. 
 .
 .
 The weather during autumn always feels chilly in this city, not enough to be cold, but enough to leave a tingling sensation on your skin. A breeze blows past, causing the leaves from the nearby maple trees to fall and coating the road with different shades of orange and red in the process. As a child, you would excitedly scurry off to the nearest pile of maple leaves before jumping into one, claiming to be making an angel out of the leaves when your mother scolded you for dirtying your clothes. All while your father laughed at the oddly familiar scene. It is a perfect day to-
 “Excuse me, miss!”. Woken from your daydreaming, you turn around to see the owner of the voice. A charming young man dressed in a beige trench coat, coupled with a turtleneck. A distinguishing feature you notice from him is the bandana wrapping around his forehead. As you realize that you have been staring at him quite long enough to be considered rude, you try to make up a respond when he continues
“Sorry to disturb you from your thoughts. I have been trying to find a way to the gallery and it seems that I haven’t gotten any luck in that. Perhaps you could show me the way? If it isn’t such a hassle to you of course”
“N-no, not at all. It seems like we were heading to the same direction after all. I could just show you the way there, if you don’t mind”.
Luckily, the man seems to not mind as he nods and begins following you. On the way, you would make sure to occasionally turn around to check up on him (which is absolutely unnecessary since he could easily outrun you if he wanted to). When it is only a few blocks away from the exhibition, the man behind you suddenly speaks up
“No matter how much you look at it. Rembrandt’s works always a sight to behold, right?”
A warm voice erupts from behind, attempting to break the silence and likely to prompt you into a conversation. You turn around just to see him gesturing toward a page about the information on the artist of the brochure occupying your hand. Normally, your shyness would come out at the worst of times, usually stirring you away by a nod of the head or a simple reply, not to be rude in others’ eyes but enough to let them know your intention. Maybe he was trying to break the awkward atmosphere between the two of you, but somehow, there is something about him that makes thought of a short conversation doesn’t sound too bad, you even feel a bit giddy. You aren’t particularly cut out for art nor did you exceptionally good at guessing the subtle meaning behind each picture, but it does feel nice to have someone you could share your interest to, even for a short time. 
“Well, it always has been. However, I actually have a different interest in mind when I come here”
“Oh, and what is that? Do tell”. You swear if you turn your back at the right time you could see how his eyes glimmer with a hint of curiosity, how his smile seems to widen a little more.  
“To be honest, I am not an encyclopedia of arts or am I in a place to be judging others’ works. But, truthfully, I have found myself more attracted to a work of John Everett Millias- "The Blind Girl”. You say sheepishly as heat slowly rises to your cheeks.
“There is no need to be shy about that. Must I say, you have quite an exquisite taste. Usually, when it comes to arts, people tend to associate with more universal names like Rembrandt or Salvador. So, it is quite refreshing to see someone who’s also on the same page as me”. His eyes crinkles as he goes on. 
You don’t know what spurs you on at that moment, maybe it’s the calming, unjudging demeanor of the stranger before you or maybe it’s the enthusiasm when someone shares the same interest with you. Either way, you have unconsciously found yourself strolling right next to him rather than marching forward.
“Yeah! People tend to be misguided when first looking into it. The painting seems to depict a normal couple of sisters enjoying the vibrant nature around them. Rather, it’s actually an allegory of the contrast between the blinded and the sighted. You can see that the younger girl shields away from the sun while her sister relishs in it, holding herself at a complete standstill just to enjoy the beauty of what surrounds her. If you take a closer look into-”
You quickly stop when it dawns on you what you are doing.
“Ah… Sorry if that was too much; I t-tend to get carried away when it comes to things like this-”
Great! You’ve done it again, you’ve probably scared off the poor man. It’s almost like a routine for you by now. You would meet someone and; you would proceed to overshare your hyperfixation on things to the said person and then; they would be weirded out and leave. At the end, you only have yourself to blame before going on and making the same mistake all over again. You just hope that there is a hole nearby so you could jump down and possibly live there for the rest of your life, maybe change your name in the process. But, you know that’s not gonna be the case and if you’re lucky, maybe he will at least be polite enough to continue to accompa-
“Please, don’t concern yourself over trivial matters. If anything, you are undermining yourself, dear.”
The endearment just rolled off his tongue with ease, like he was addressing a friend rather than a stranger. It’s a wonder how one’s mental state could drastically change in one single moment. Suddenly, the weather feels incredibly stifling despite it being mid-autumn; Has your cheeks always been this warm?
As though bemused by your stammering, he goes on
“Even so, what further entices me is why you happen to be so fascinated by the painting. Would you view it in the same light again, knowing that might be a pure act of compassion toward the fate of the two sisters?”
A soft smile appears on your face, taking away the place where a frown once resided. Instead of being offended, you find yourself unusually relaxed around him
“Maybe I will, maybe I won't. Honestly, I don’t know either.” A breathless laugh left your mouth and at the corner of your eyes, you could see his brows are burrowed, likely confused at your answer. 
“Be it a doing of my sympathy or just a passing interest. When I look at the painting, it feels like my mind, which has always been  at an impasse, could progress toward something now.” You pause for a moment before going on
“While it is good to have common ground, but not because of which should you confine yourself to what others view. Anyways, I could never find myself getting bored of this.”
A heartfelt laugh erupts besides you, rich in the sincerity that catches you off guard. You turn your head and something ridiculous passes your mind in that moment.
 It feels as if the young man before you was a child whose smile is just as carefree as he is
The thought doesn’t stay in your mind for long as the outline of your destination begins to appear, prompting the end of your time together. This time, you don’t even bother to hide the disappointment lying behind your voice.
“ Oh… it seems like we’re here. Well, I hope that you enjoy your visit here. It was nice talking to you.”
The man extends his hand to you before speaking up
“While I am here with the intention to visit this exhibition alone, it appears that I might not completely have a grasp around here. So, would my current tour guide be interested in accompanying me for a while longer?”
There is a nagging feeling at the back of your mind. You should be more careful but you don’t care. The offer stands as tempting as that of a siren calling out for any sailors unfortunate enough to cross and for once, you want to feel what it like to have your head submerged in water, to reach out for more while you drown in the sweet voice of the monstrous being. 
You reach out, placing your hand in his. His hand is calloused, a contrast to his immaculate face. He gives your hand a few tender squeezes, your hand fits perfectly in his.
“Well, if you are willing to hear a whole ramble on paintings, then that is. But before that, can you tell me your name? It would be weird to not know your name, considering all the time we spent together.” 
The name spilled out from his name rings like a bell in your head. But whether it is for a blessing or a bad omen remains a mystery to you.
“Chrollo-”
“Chrollo Lucilfer”
.
.
Chrollo has never been one for closer connections, maybe the closest he has ever been to anyone was when he was younger, when the hopes and dreams of a better tomorrow were still beating in his chest. But even the foolest would know that innocence equals vulnerability in Meteor City, a deadly one at least. What started at a normal interaction- where you help him and he will be on his merry way- quickly spiraled into something more. Even Shizuku noticed his shift in demeanor. It’s quite reasonable when it’s not a common occurance to see the head of the infamous Phantom Troupe- a ruthless criminal who is nothing but a nightmare, the devil’s incarnate in the tales of even the cruelest criminals, to be head over heels towards a normal civilian. He has traveled far and wide and yet, he rarely lingers on for long. Nonetheless, the mere thought of someone other than him might come across you, soaking in the warmth and vibrancy you have to offer like a sponge irks him greatly. The possessive nature of a thief runs deep in his blood. A credo through which he has devotedly followed, ingrained on every single molecule that forms his very essence. If he wants something then he steals it. Anything that falls under his possessions are meant to be admired from a distance not to be leered at, and not he himself could make an exception for you. While Chrollo is no halfwitted to not realize that letting you as you be there would always be someone, far better than him, to come in and swoop you up your feet when he has to part for one of his ‘ business trip’ , he is not cruel enough to strip away your freedom, at least not for now. He would like for you to remain your individuality for a while longer and captivity could do so much to one’s mental state. While it is just an inevitable bump of your relationship, it is not one that could be easily smoothed over with kisses and comforts. 
Chrollo is not a sentimental person, but he would go as far as to say he has become quite fond of the gesture where couples would wear matching items. It gives a profound message that you are off limits, lest anyone who are dense enough, well, they could try. His gestures are subtle, but not obscure, a keen eye will be able to spot one or two, which usually under the form of the choker wrapping around your neck or the form-fitting black dress that seems to suit his taste more than yours. He wonders how much he can imprint on you, how much he can steal before you notice or would you ever be aware of his tendency at all. Give him an inch and he would take a mile, once you give your heart to him, you could never expect to receive it back without giving up a few parts of you to him. 
 Throughout his journey, Chrollo has his fair share of experiences with others, through which he has learned how to gouge out the worst in people. Humans are just a combination of different components linked together and each requiring a unique blueprint. Treading the water carefully, using the right combination of words and as though every part is laid bare before him. While Chrollo uses this ability to see the worst in order, you, on the other hand, use it to see the best, to put back the mangle parts of the said people he always inclined to break. Despite your timid nature, you seem to hold more than you view, for better or worse. In a way, he would go as far to say you and him are so alike in many ways, and yet, so acutely different at the same time.
Nostalgic is an unfamiliar term as well as a foreign experience to him. What’s there to long for when there is already nothing to begin with? And normalcy is impossible for him, with the fall of his friends, the blood on his hand; with everything that he has gone through, Chrollo knows there will never be a day when he is able to rest. Domesticity is a privilege you made possible for him with what you have got. And for that, it will be your downfall. His past experiences have taught him to cling as tightly as possible to what dear to him. So even if you end up with a few scratches and bruises, if his hand ends up bloody in the process, nothing won’t be resolved with consolations, which will serve as your comfort and your eternal sentence. 
So, even if the path he has chosen is one leading straight to hell then so be it. He will gladly drag you down with him, even if it means the gate to your eden will be shut forever.
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