#i have to be getting old like that has to be the reason why i had to look up what rizz meant
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carpe noctem [ climax ] | sylus
â summary: sylus drags you onto a mission with him for old timeâs sake. and you slide into familiarity, almost like there isnât a wedge in the form of a beautiful young hunter driving you apart. â cw: explicit sexual content, reader is not mc, reader implied to be femme, assassin!reader, mentions of blood, profanity, mentions of pedophilia, mentions of human trafficking, minor character death, men with guns, reader has a shitty past, self-destructive behavior, reader doing her assassin duties, a little romance sprinkled in between, mdni â notes: inspired by mr. & mrs. smith. thank you so much for reading, lovely! [ part 1 | part 2 | part 3 ] â now playing: cariĂąo - the marĂas â obligatory tags: @withering-dream @an-ever-angry-bi @midiplier @abbylee0710 @picnicthegarden @karespocketboyfriends @chrissy26 @delulusimps @glamouroki @midiplier @celestemcbrim @everywherenothere @ari-shipping-stuff @beewilko @alexhenituse @nim-rose @moonlight-inthe-sea @sunnyf4lls @himiko-omikami @inkonparchment @sillyfreakfanparty @regandoesthings @im-in-different-universe @ravensheart18 @alyyylog @corvid007 (sorry if i missed anyone.)
He wanted to make love. You wanted to fuck.
He wanted you, all tender and pliant beneath him, his name hinged in your throat. He wanted to worship you, to uncover the erogenous zones of your body piece by piece, and to expose you like forgotten treasure buried deep beneath rotting ruins.Â
But you reasoned you didnât have time. You were in a hurryâa hurry for what, exactly, you couldnât pinpoint.Â
Perhaps you were rushing to feel something, in a hurry to please and to feel useful as you tore his shirt from his shoulders, his body rigid and searing between the thick of your thighs. Pleasing is all you know, serving embedded in your chemical makeup, no room to pursue your own desires.Â
Your mouths came together so abruptly that your teeth clashed. The counter of his kitchen island was glacial and tacky beneath your thighs. Youâd barely divested yourself of your coat before you drew him into an ardent dance of tongues, his abs twitching beneath the artful crawl of your fingers. You tugged at the give of his pants, quietly yet vehemently demanding he take them off. He drew back, wild-eyed and hair mussed, eyes drowsy with want.
âWe should slow down,â he sighed, hot and open-mouthed where your shoulder met neck. Blistered down to your collarbone where he nipped, hands roosted on your hips, thumbs soothingly cruising over juts of bone.Â
It made you sick, his tenderness. You werenât glass and didnât deserve to be handled like it.Â
You chuckled something husky and bitter, tossing your thoughts to the wolves. Your fingers raked through his hair. Grabbing the scruff of his neck, you brought his mouth back to yours, trapping any further words of protest in his throat.Â
You didnât want to think. Didnât want complications. Just wanted to be driven by sensation, tucking your inhibitions into the darkest hulls of your mind.Â
Youâre a bit of a masochist. You enjoy punishing yourself for misdeeds youâve constructed in your mindâhaving feelings for your boss, secretly envying your friend. Your use is slowly running its course, and youâll one day be thrown to the wayside.Â
You figure you donât deserve kindness. Sensitivity. You donât deserve a slow love, the steady creep of an orgasm bubbling in your stomach, invoked by the sluggish grind of hips, words of affirmation whispered like the sweetest supplication into your ear.
No.
You deserve to be used, lusted after. Youâve spent most of your adult life with that mentality, your past having engraved that under your skin. Youâve been a weapon for as long as you can remember. A tool. Loveless. Which is why, when the gentleman whoâd frequented Lux wanted to take his time with you, you declined, opting for something more ragged and intense.Â
He took you hard and rough on his counter at your behest. Left you open, bare, laughing, battling to get your breath under control. You stayed the night to humor him. Let him hold you as he stroked the sweetest compliments of all with ghostly fingers into your skin as the stars in the sky gave way to the gentle spill of sun rays.Â
You crept out of his arms and apartment once he sank below the misty shawl of sleep. Heâd inquire about your whereabouts laterâask why you didnât stay. You rarely did. Tonight, you felt weak.Â
Youâd ignore him until you next needed him. When the urge to forget sunk its talons into your chest, curling around your heart and squeezing.Â
You had a mission to prepare for. Sylusâ name lit up your notifications, cryptic as ever with minimal words. Youâd deal with your feelings later.Â
There was work to be done.
Besides, you didnât even remember his name.Â
How could you face him when youâd uttered someone elseâs name while he was deep inside you?
â
You pay for your escapades in the form of pretty petals of blue and green blooming on your neck the following night. Bite marks.Â
You rub at the raw skin for the nth time, a hiss forced through grit teeth. Maybe he was a little too rough. Concealer works wonders, coupled with your glamor. Still doesnât take away the sting, but you suppose the pain is your punishment for being weak.
You stretch, yawning. Shift until the leather of the carâs backseat squeaks. You sense his eyes on you in your periphery, boring down to the marrow. The fine hairs littering your body stand on end. You maneuver again, leant against the door, cheek propped on your knuckles.Â
You try to focus on the scenery unfolding beyond the carâs windshield. Powdery stars spilled over a deep violet canvas. The red glare of brake lights every so often as you approach another vehicle. Try to focus on the driverâs fingers readjusting on the steering wheel, on the fixed hum of the engine, and how it intermingles with the gentle bumps on the road. Home in on your breathing and the thunderous drum of your heart. Heâs been watching you like this since you eased into the carâSylus.Â
You get this creeping suspicion he wants to say something. Like he knows all your secrets, having perused through them like theyâre the yellowed pages of a book. Nah. He wouldnât know what kind of night you had. He wouldnât care. Youâre a grown woman, capable of making your own mistakes and reaping the repercussions of them. He has other things on his mindâother people.Â
Another yawn escapes you. You curse yourself for not grabbing coffee on your way out. Too busy pouring yourself into your dress, painting your face with makeup, and meticulously tucking your weapons away.Â
âLong day?â says Sylus. You jolt the slightest bit at the grit of his voice. How it breaks up the silence and sets your stomach alight with dragonflies. Fabric shifts. His exhale is weighted beside you, thigh brushing yours as he spreads his legs, so very big in comparison to the backseat.Â
You force a smile, smoothing out the wrinkles of your dress. âYou could say that.â
You feel the shift in his gaze. Thereâs a whisper of bitterness in his tone when he next speaks. âMaybe you should spend less time pursuing your hobbies at night and more time sleeping.â
This time, you do turn. Cut your eyes to him, mouth tugged up with confusion. His expression reads passivity. Mouth scrawled into a rigid line, scarlet eyes fixed to yours, unrelenting. Somethingâs off about him tonight. You sensed it in the brevity of his call when he phoned you to outline your missionâyouâd be accompanying him tonight to a banquet. A glittering, amenable doll on his arm, smiling pretty like murder wasnât rotting your mind. Youâd lure your target away to be snuffed out like a candleâs flame. Slip out without drawing suspicion, and the world would be rid of another shit stain.Â
He quirks a brow, wordlessly challenging you. No customary smirk comes this time. Just the air weighted with something tense. Your throat clicks when you swallow. You opt for obliviousness, laughing it off despite the gnarling feeling in your gut worming its way up your throat. Despite every synapse in your brain screaming for you to fire back. Youâre reading too much into things. Heâs being his usual, detached self, and not because he knows you were up to no good last night.
Right?
âMaybe I should.âÂ
The tendons in Sylusâ neck pull, jaw tensing. For a moment, he looks like he wants to keep prodding. But he instead averts his gaze when the driver chimes in, announcing youâve arrived at your destination.Â
The venueâs tawny spotlights dance over the windshield as the car crawls to a stop. People donned in expensive formalwear line the sidewalk, animatedly chatting as they await entry. You take some time to admire the historic, art deco architecture before your door opens, the crisp evening air spilling in and fanning over your skin.Â
You look up when Sylus offers you his arm. His expression softens considerably, contrasting the wet cat he was moments ago. Thereâs a hint of a smile twitching his lips. He almost looks boyish, and you canât help taking him in. Heâs dressed to the nines, tucked in a three-piece tux, bow tie meticulously tied, hair swept up into a pretty, alabaster coif.
Your lips spasm. You peel yourself from the seat, gathering up the trail of your dress. Twine your arm with his, allowing him to shepherd you through the throng of people. It almost feels like old times, their voices petering to a hush when they catch sight of you. They part like a school of fish as the pair of you make your way up the steps leading to the venueâs doors.
âStay frosty,â you joke to dispel your nerves, standing before the heavy, double doors, waiting for the attendees to open them.Â
Sylus snorts, his arm flexing beneath the possessive clutch of your fingers. He pinches the bridge of his nose. And the exasperation in his voice makes your eyes crinkle with mirth. âPlease, never say that again.â
You slide into familiarity thereafter, almost like there wasnât a wedge in the form of a beautiful young hunter driven between you.
â
She said something curious to you when you arrived at the airport earlierâMs. Hunter. You had the time to spare. You wanted to ask why she requested you drive her instead of Sylus. But you didnât push it, figuring she had her reasons. Maybe she didnât have the energy for his nagging, his fretting. She should be so lucky.Â
Sheâd be gone for a couple of weeks, swept up in the grueling task of protecting researchers in the mountains from Wanderers. A part of you felt sorry for her. Worried. But she was a big girl. If she could smack Sylus around in Kitty Cards, she could dodge a few teeth and claws, no problem.Â
âNeed help?â you asked over your shoulder, the SUVâs engine humming idly at the airportâs drop-off point.Â
She smiled at you from the backseat. âI got it!â She chirped as she fetched her oversized suitcase from the floor.Â
She rounded the vehicle, bowing to your level at the window. Up close, her smile looked more mischievous than usual. Smile lines bracketed her honey-dipped eyes as she murmured, âBe nice to Sylus. Heâs trying, ya know?âÂ
You pinned her with a quizzical look, your mouth working around a retort. She left before you could get a word out. You watched her slip through the crowd of travelers milling about before she was out of sight, leaving you to mull over what the hell that meant.
â
It starts to make sense as time passes what she meant.Â
When youâve gorged yourself on conversation and champagne, nestled between politicians, CEOs, socialites, and people of the like. Fickle, spewing gossip you canât be bothered to keep up with.Â
Sylus rarely leaves your side, only slipping away to chat up old colleagues or to procure you more bubbly. Always has a hand, scorching and possessive, at the small of your back, or an arm slung about your waist, drawing you into the safety his body exudes. He doesnât correct anyone when they address you as his, giving you a subdued, amused look when you work your mouth into amending them.
You titter shyly, toying with your necklace. Maybe this is a part of your coverâpretending to be his significant other, all pretty and docile at his side. You wonât complain. Itâs nice being this close, feeling wanted, and being envied in a different way. Not for your body, but for the man wrapped so willingly around your finger.Â
Itâs felt like ages since youâve last done a gig together, so youâll enjoy his attention, even if itâs all a ploy, while you can.
The evening slides by in a blur of twinkling chandeliers and laughter.Â
Sylus draws you into a dance, and the pair of you are swallowed up by the mass of swaying couples and the string orchestra. Your cheeks ache with a smile, your limbs and inhibitions loosened by the champagne. He holds you to him as you waltz, his body rigid and devastating against yours, languorous fingers curled around your nape. He hasnât stopped smiling, a boyish dimple cratering his cheek. Hasnât released you from the scarlet stir of his eyes since, and you smoosh your face against pectoral muscle, hiding the warmth splotching your cheeks. Â
His heart thrums something steady beneath your ear. Beneath the expensive pleat of his tux. Breaths even, his bewitching scent furling in your chest like smoke. You let him lead you about the glittering marble tiles of the dance floor, feeling like youâre in a dream. Perhaps itâs the bubbly thatâs got you toddling through a dreamlike fog, but a fraction of you starts to think, just for a second, youâre more than a cover, and your boss isnât so detached, shoving you to the back burner in favor of someone else.Â
Your breath is sharp when he suddenly peels away, expertly twirling you. You laugh as your dress flutters around your ankles, nearly tripping you up. He dips you as the music dampens, the beautiful scenery tilting and blurring. Swathed in the tawny, dim lighting of the banquet hall, you make out his features, something akin to affection loosening his expression, and the smile slips from your face.Â
The world fades away, and only the pair of you seem to exist in this moment. He pulls you closer until your vision fills with red, fringed by dark, wispy lashes sweeping over cheeks mottled pink. His lips purse as his gaze slides to your mouth, breath stirring your baby hairs. You hold your breath as he eases in, appearing like heâll kiss you, and youâre stricken by something hot. Your mouths but a hairsbreadth apart, he whispers something that makes your heart sink to your feet.
âItâs showtime.â
The magic of the moment falls away as he steadies you. A pout worms its way onto your face as Sylus tangles your fingers together, a chuckle swelling in his chest. He leads you back to your table, still holding your hand, even long after youâve returned to your seats.
â
Nikolai is easy to manipulate. To bend to your will. Of course, he is. All men are if you know how to approach them.Â
It helps that your glamor erases a few years off your face, giving you the appearance of a young woman barely experiencing the world. His favorite. It only takes you fluttering your lashes, laughing pretty, and flattering him to get him to take you back to his hotel room.
On the surface, heâs a passive, middle-aged man who looks like he wouldnât harm a fly. But beneath that facade, heâs a scourge waiting to be wiped out. Heâs as despicable as everyone else youâve bumped off, auctioning off girls to nefarious men under the guise of selling âharmless little dolls.â Moonlighting as a franchise owner, using his stores as a ruse to smuggle young girls through the channels of the underworld.Â
You take that personally, having once been on the auctioning floor yourself. Memories of a past painted red flood your mind, and it makes your stomach churn with disgust. You were lucky then, having been turned into a murderous tool rather than a fucktoy. So, it makes sense why Sylus was so eager to get you on this mission. Like he knew youâd take pleasure in watching Nikolaiâs life drain from his eyes, his blood caked up under your nails.Â
Your smile twitches, threatening to screw up into a grimace as you walk at Nikolaiâs side, arm in arm. Heâs red-faced and cheery, having gorged himself on champagne and merriment at the banquet. You wouldâve snuffed him out if four bodyguards didnât flank you. Not like you canât take them, but youâd rather complete your mission as quietly as possible without rousing suspicion.
You just have to keep up the act long enough to isolate him so you can make your move. Heâs been ruffling Onychinusâ feathers, claiming to be in cahoots with its notorious leader. Sylus, of course, doesnât like that, not wanting to be associated with the likes of him. This is where you come into play, his ever-faithful watchdog, ready to kill at the drop of a hat.
Nikolai ushers you into his hotel room, where three more guards stand in good form in the living area. You acknowledge them with a seductive smile, allowing one to frisk you. Your smile grows tenfold when he finds nothing, clearing his throat and straightening his tie as if heâs fallen prey to your charm. Someone should be fired.
Nikolai leads you into his room thereafter, the double doors shutting and locking with finality. You offer him a massage, to which the portly man happily accepts, stripping down to his boxers and plopping onto the king-sized bed. He has a thing for pretty, young girls barely scraping the surface of legality. Youâll see to it heâs ushered into the afterlife by one.
Your hair waterfalls from its updo, warm as it spills onto your shoulders when you pull your hairpin free. You ruck up your gown, climbing over his body to roost yourself on his backside, legs bracketing either side of his waist, heels digging waning moons into your thighs. Youâre sultry as you ensnare him in small talk, fingers kneading over layers of fat and muscle. Nikolai hums appreciatively, seemingly thrilled to have your company. Just the way you want him.
Your fingers tip-toe up his spine, thumbs smoothing over the notches of bone there. He exhales beneath your ministrations, remarking how magical your hands are. You huff a laugh as your fingers curl around his jaw, the opposing set burying themselves in his hair.Â
âMassaging isnât the only thing my hands are good at.â
With a fluent twitch of your wrists, his neck snaps, the sound barely heard above the gentle croon of the jazz music he queued up beforehand, accompanied by the exhale of a life dying out like a flame.Â
You pull his eyelids down, easing off his lifeless body. Stare at his corpse with a faraway look in your eyes, smoothing some hair away from his face. Like heâs a sacrifice to the little girl inside, screaming for revenge. You straighten your dress when the bedroom doors rattle, Nikolaiâs men frantically calling his name. Shit. Maybe you werenât as meticulous as you thought.Â
Quickly, you survey your surroundings for a way out. Spot the sliding doors leading to the balcony, and you dart between them, the wispy curtains grazing over your fevered skin. A wintry kiss of wind greets you as you lean over the rail, hair ruffling, and you take in the bokeh of lights glittering on the street below.Â
Youâre at least eight stories from the ground, so jumping is out of the question. You could very well fight your way out, but Nikolaiâs guards are heavily armed. Thereâs no guarantee youâll make it out of the fray unscathed.Â
You lean back against the rail, adrenaline spuming through you, watching the bedroom doors pulse as his guards kick and shove against them. Fuck! Tugging a knife from the garter belt tucked beneath the slit of your dress, you prepare for a fight, body taut, nerves flaring.Â
Just when youâve resolved to get your hands dirty, something feathery touches your bare shoulder. Gentle and curious in its embrace, and you whip your head around to its source. Youâre met with a smoky tendril, speckled with claret orbs of energy, swirling ominously before you. You peer over the railing, a familiar shock of white blurring into frame. Thereâs no mistaking the upward cant of his lips, and the crinkle of scarlet-spun eyes from this height. He motions to you with two fingers from the sidewalk, wordlessly beseeching you to come down.
âYouâve got to be kidding me,â you mutter, a nervous expression stretching your features. Heights have never been your forte, but you suppose beggars canât be choosers. âFuck it,â you relent, gathering some courage and climbing onto the rail.Â
Nikolaiâs men finally break through, and as they dart in, spraying the room in a hail of bullets upon seeing Nikolaiâs corpse, you fall into the feathery cradle of Sylusâ Evol, a yip ripped from your throat.Â
You float to the ground like a feather, falling into Sylusâ arms. He looks down at you with something unguarded shining in his eyes, using his Evol as a shield when Nikolaiâs men pelt the pair of you with a barrage of bullets.
You lose yourself in the moment. Your lips part, lids heavy with something you canât quite place.Â
âTook you long enough,â you chide to dispel the tension brewing between you, trying to catch your breath.
âIâll be more punctual next time,â Sylus answers with a chuckle, voice rumbling against your body as he casually walks away from the scene, refusing to put you down, even long after heâs warped you to safety.Â
rising action | masterlist
#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus angst#lads sylus#sylus#lnds sylus#l&ds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#sylus love and deepspace#carpe noctem series#limerence series
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âËŕżBrahms Heelshire thoughts~!đđËâ
Taglist: @asher-is-hotxp @unstab1eperson2 @kimisbunny @yyuinaa @silvern1006
A/N: jus some thoughts Nâ personal feels bout one of ma fav boys, Nâ written specifically for @creepy141dollie <33
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Personally I like thinkin Brahms Sâ a big Ol baby, heâs touch starved atâ death Nâ when youâre his new baby sitter all he can wonder asâ whyâre you a boy? Whereâs his nanny atâŚheâs silent as always creeping through in the walls just watchin the way you do things- he canât deny how good ya are at all tha domestic stuff, house hubby material Sâ what he first thought when he seen ya. Youâre a sassy man he can tell that much bout you from the way you scold him and push out your bottom lip when lookin up at him, he doesnât know how you made it past his old fashioned parents- maybe ya charms work on everyone.
Brahms Sâ a total creep, he gives no privacy he stalks ya like a dog, he lurks even when ya ask him not to, he is obsessed all tha time- his infatuation holds no bounds Nâ he isnât afraid Tâ watch your most intimate moments in tha shower or when you touch yaâself, Brahms hates when you lecture him, talkin bout how you wont let his cock near you sayin stuff like, âI only reward good boysâ even tho knowin you, youâd start Tâ feel bad Nâ give into him by the end of the nightâ how could ya not with the way he begs you, his voice cracks Nâ you can practically feel his tears behind that porcelain mask.
Bein his babysitter means giving up your life- heâs crazy Nâ heâs toxic for you but you canât bring yourself to leave himâŚyou jus feel bad- he holds you anâ praises you like a god when he wants but he screams Nâ throw fits over you when heâs upsetâ Yâ know you should runaway but you jus canât- youâre in too far now anyway Sâ why even bother to try Nâ leave him? Ever since you took that job everything feels cold- the air, Your body Nâ itâs all porcelain like, just like his mask. You used Tâ love shopping but the most you do is go out into town Tâ pick up groceries then ya go back to BrahmsâŚthat house has made you isolated from thâ world Nâ Brahms doesnât care at all, he jus wants you to himself.
Brahms is a manipulator, he uses your soft spots to get his ways, he promises all ya wanna hear jus to get you Tâ stay. Brahms acts all innocent like he isnât tha reason for your change in personality Nâ he isnât the reason youâre starting Tâ slowly lose that sass, heâs worn ya down into a tired parent like person. Brahms uses his tears Tâ wrap you around his finger knowin you canât resist the way he clings to you like a god, Brahms worships the ground you walk on when you give him what he wants which is to ultimately have you forever.
Brahms Sâ pent up all the time, sneakin off into your room when he needs tha love, not Carin bout anything jus getting your shorts down enough Tâ shove his dick in ya while you sleepily hiss into the pillows whining bout how heâs bein rough- Brahms whimpers- he tryâs ta be quiet but when your hole sucks him back Nâ he loses it like a puppy poutin and moaning away on top of you clutching onto you hard while his hips erratically fuck you in ya sheets
Brahms fav position is cowgirl tho it should probably be cowboy Wâ you on top- your hand gripping his shoulders working up Nâ down taking his cock with ease while his eyes hold contact Wâ yours- his breath is shaky Nâ he canât control how weak he feels but somethin bout his fave being covered starin into your soul the whole time has ya buckin down on his cock wildly âplease- please, I need you, only you- just you- pleaseâ your body melted when those words left his mouth oh so pathetically- how could this be the same man who broke you down? How could he.. before you know it his semen Sâ floodin inside you filling ya all full.
#sleep-0-deprived#sleep 0 deprived#brahms heelshire#brahms the boy#x male reader#x male reader smut#bottom male reader#gay mlm#mlm ns/fw#dark content#dark content x male reader#dark blog#dark smut#dark aesthetic#slashers x male reader#slasher x male reader#slashers#x bratty male reader#the boy x reader#stalker x darling#slight yandere#yan themes#yandere thoughts#yandere character#personal headcanon#x dom bottom male reader
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hey loved your fics you are incredibly talented. i have a scene picture some angst reader is kinda like jo march if u watched little women and luigi is laurie in that one hill scene. basically reader prioritizes acads because of her upbringing - high achiever, academic validations, the whole package and luigi somehow is the same but he compels the reader in a magnetic way because luigi gets to be so carefree and awesome about it and turns out luigi and reader have a common thread and it's turning out rlly good but then reader is slightly scared of commitment in a relationship dare i say? because it was all acads for reader even though there were dreams of having a relationship, it all seemed abstract and unreal!! and the angst comes when luigi confesses to reader and reader reacts very defensive i suppose spitting out word vomit enumerating reasons why luigi shouldnt like her and how he's too good for her and luigi just shuts reader up by pinching their cheeks and holding them steady saying i want you all of you all that sweet stuff...this is just a thought i want to say i admire you heavily your writing is pivotal
Content: SFW, angst, yearning, pining, best friends, purest love, summer, unrequited, lowkey gut-wrenching (sorry)
W.c: 6,843 (I could not stop writing)
Notes; Before we begin, I have to say, anon, I very much enjoyed writing this!! And thank you so much for sending me this request! ⨠there are only a couple bits of dialogue that match the hill scene, but I wanted to throw them in there!
This is lowkey a mini-fic, so enjoy!
Side note: If anything is badly edited, I will likely come back to do some cleaning up. But maybe not. Also Iâve started picking songs to include in requests wherever they may fit in. I want to mention too that backstory is something I just simply canât leave out when it comes to angsty or emotional scenes, so Iâm sorry I literally canât shut up.
The cicadas weave their summer hymn through the gentle lap of water against stone, your body stretched across whisper-soft grass beside the reservoir.
This spot holds years of you both â echoes of skinned knees and bruised elbows soothed by cool spring water, of childhood dares and teenage secrets.
"You never swim with me anymore." Luigi's voice carries no accusation, just a quiet observation that somehow makes it worse. You can picture his expression without looking âthat gentle, knowing thing that always sees too much. "All you do now is torch yourself in the sun."
Your back peels away from the grass, elbows bent to prop you up. Through his borrowed sunglasses â because of course you forgot yours back at the house, and of course he had a spare âyou study him.
He's summer personified: water-darkened hair curling at his temples, shoulders golden in the early evening light, wearing a smile easy as breathing.
"I just don't want to get my hair wet, Lu." You say it with the comfortable certainty of someone who's had this exact argument a hundred times before.
"Well, don't then." His retort is quick, familiar. He moves through the water with an easy grace that somehow makes the old reservoir look more inviting than it ever has, though you'd never admit it.
Your shoulders are painted with freckles from all these summer days â chasing chickens in the fields, racing bikes into the city with him riding at your back, his presence as constant as the seasons.
"But then when I get out, I'll be cold." The words float between you like lazy dragonflies, and Luigi just shakes his head, spattering droplets that catch the light.
He pouts, but not like you do.
Where your pouts are theatrical productions, his is a quiet thing â eyebrows drawn together in thought, bottom lip pulled inward instead of jutted out dramatically. His gaze fixes downward at his feet beneath the crystal-clear water, methodically toeing one stone over, then another, like the placement of each pebble might solve some grand puzzle.
You watch him wage his silent war of reorganization, using nothing but his ten toes as construction equipment. It's such a Luigi thing to do â finding the smallest tasks to occupy himself instead of splashing around like he usually does, trying to tempt you in.
"Bet the water feels incredible," he murmurs, more to the stones than to you. His toes have created a perfect semicircle now, a tiny amphitheater beneath the surface. "Like that lemonade your mom makes â you know, the one with mint?"
You do know.
The kind she only makes when the temperature crawls past ninety, when the air feels thick enough to chew. Like today. You can almost taste it â tart and cool and perfect â which is exactly what Luigi intended with that particular comparison, the sneak.
"You're not as subtle as you think you are," you inform him, but you're already sitting up straighter, your legs beginning to tingle from staying still too long in the sun.
The grass has left impressions on your skin, tiny crosshatched patterns that Luigi always says look like secret maps, his fingers drawing lines upon them.
He doesn't look up from his underwater construction project, but one corner of his mouth quirks upward. "Never claimed to be subtle. That's your department, avoiding the water like it's personally offended you."
"The water hasn't offended me," you say, though you draw your knees up to your chest, putting another inch between you and the shoreline. "We have a mutual understanding. It stays there, and I stay here."
"Mhm." Luigi abandons his stone circle, wading a few steps deeper until the water laps at his knees, stood there in his trunks, the cobalt blue ones that hit just above his mid-thigh. "And how's that working out for you? Enjoying your dusty patch of grass while I'm out here living like a king?"
The problem is, he does look a bit regal out there, all long limbs and easy grace, like he was born for summer days and spring water.
You've known Lu since you were both gap-toothed and gangly, but sometimes â like now â he seems to have grown into himself while you weren't looking.
Yet, your own limbs still feel too long, too awkward, like you're wearing a costume that doesn't quite fit.
Meanwhile, Luigi wears summer like a second skin, all easy movements and natural grace, as if the universe decided to polish him up while leaving you in your perpetual state of stumbling through doorways.
"A king of minnows, maybe," you counter, but you're already uncurling, letting your feet stretch toward the water's edge. Not to join him, obviously. Just to... test the temperature.
"Ah," he says softly, watching your toes creep closer, his voice taking on a funny narrators tone, an accent thrown in that sounded similar to his fathers. "The snail emerges from her shell."
"Shell-less snails are just slugs," you inform him primly, but dip one toe in anyway. The water isn't as cold as you expected â it never is, but that doesn't stop you from putting on this show every single time. "And I'm neither."
"No," Luigi agrees, dropping the accent but keeping that amused lilt in his voice. "You're more like- like one of those hermit crabs. The ones that think really hard about switching shells but then just stick with the same one anyway."
You splash water at him with your foot, and he doesn't even try to dodge. "Fuck, Lu âThat's the worst analogy I've ever heard."
"Is it?" He takes a few steps backward, deeper into the water, like he's laying out a trail for you to follow. "Because you're still sitting there, thinking about coming in, just like you do every time.â
Luigi could easily remember all the days spent here, in this very body of water together â the secret collection of precious gems that were really just polished river rocks, the fossil that turned out to be an old bottle cap, and that infamous river snake from an overturned stone that had you shrieking and refusing to dive under for weeks.
"Can't be thinking about doing it if I'm already doing it, Lu." You roll your eyes, your shins now lapping gently with clean, cool water. The trees droop overhead like nature's own parasol, their leaves casting dappled shadows that dance across your shoulders.
He's quiet for a moment, watching you with an expression you can't quite read. And then. âRemember when we thought we found actual dinosaur bones here?"
"You mean the plastic fork?"
"A very convincing plastic fork."
The water feels like silk against your skin now, and you find yourself wading deeper without really meaning to. It's muscle memory, maybe â your body remembering what your mind keeps second-guessing.
"At least I wasn't the one who tried to sell it to the museum.â you remind him, the water now swirling around your waist. Each step stirs up tiny clouds of silt that disappear into the clear water.
He splashes in your direction, grinning. "We were tweleve! And Mrs. Henderson at the museum was very nice about it."
"She gave you a cookie and a lecture about scientific integrity."
"Exactly. A win-win."
You're deep enough now that you have to lift your arms to keep them dry, though you're not sure why you're bothering. Your bikini is already clinging to you, and that familiar weightless feeling is starting to take over â the one that always made you feel brave before.
"You know what your real problem is?" Luigi quips, but this time his voice is gentler. "You forgot how to play."
The words hit harder than you expect, maybe because there's no teasing in them now.
Just truth, floating there on the surface like a leaf.
"I didn't forget," you say quietly. "I just- I put it away somewhere."
The look in his eyes tells you exactly what's coming, but muscle memory kicks in before you can retreat, your arms already up in defense position as he sends a massive splash your way, the arc of water catching sunlight like scattered diamonds before it hits you full in the face.
"Luigi!" you shriek, but you're already laughing, already moving. Your soul remembers this dance even if your mind's been trying to forget it, and the water parts easily as you lunge toward him, years of practice making your movements swift and sure.
He tries to dodge, but you know all his tricks â the way he always feints left before going right, how he can't resist staying just within splashing range.
The water battle that ensues is immediate and fierce, both of you laughing and gasping, sending waves in every direction, limbs smacking into each other at times, your body trailing away from his while he charged closer.
"See?" he manages between splashes. "The Queen of minnows!â
You're about to respond when your foot slips on a smooth stone, and suddenly you're going under.
For a split second, panic flares â but then the tranquility and silence envelops you, and it feels like greeting an old friend, your eyes open underwater, seeing the filtered sunlight create shifting patterns all around you, and suddenly you remember why you used to love this so much.
When you surface, pushing wet hair from your face, Luigi is watching you with a grin, his sunglasses pushed away from his face and atop his head instead, nestled in his damp black curls. âYou got your hair wet.â He gives you one last gentle splash, his grin so carved into his features it may as well be everlasting.
Luigi, the son of Marco Mangione, whose genius lay in transforming his grandfather's modest Milan carpentry shop into Mangione Artisan Living â now a name whispered in the same breath as Fendi Casa and Bottega Veneta's home collection.
When Marco married Sofia Bernardi in the 80âs, a celebrated interior designer, they moved to America, the local papers painting it as another wealthy foreigner's passing fancy â this modernist villa rising among cornfields and weathered barns.
But Marco had seen something in these hills that reminded him of Tuscany, in the calloused hands of local woodworkers that echoed his grandfather's.
The Mangione Mansion stands like a slice of northern Italy transplanted to American soil, with its stark geometries softened by groves of imported olive trees and terraced gardens.
It's a world away from your family's farmhouse, where the paint peels in honest patches and the screen door creaks a familiar welcome, yet Marco moves between these worlds with effortless grace, discussing the merits of different wood grains with your father across the fence line, or clearing out your mother's farmer's market stall of preserves, declaring each jar Perfetto, just like my Nonna's! with the same genuine warmth he uses to greet European royalty.
Luigi, who could have been pressed into private academies and dinner jackets, groomed for Ivy League legacies and country club memberships, had instead grown up alongside you in public school â though his future was cushioned by both financial security and natural brilliance.
You can't remember a time when academic excellence wasn't your north star â every assignment a stepping stone, every grade a battle in the war for your future.
Being a veterinarian wasn't just a dream, it was your escape route from the endless cycle of farm life that had worn your father's hands to calluses and bent your mother's back.
Perfect attendance since kindergarten, straight A's through AP Biology, even showing up on Senior Skip Day â just you and Lacey Williams, the would-be neurosurgeon, bent over your textbooks in an empty classroom.
Now here you both are in the water â you with your scholarship letters and student loan applications waiting at home, him with acceptance letters from Harvard and Yale gathering dust on his desk.
Two lives that should never have intersected, meeting in the middle of sun-warmed water, your shared freckles catching golden light, limbs tangling as Luigi feints another playful attack.
â˘
Summer buzzes by your eyeshot like a cicada in a hurry, the season winding down with cooler, longer nights and shorter, blazing hot days.
August comes barreling through like it always does, hot and sticky air clinging to your skin as you sit with Luigi upon the sloped side of the barn, a Birds Eye view of the farm, this very spot the first place the two of you had tried smoking weed, the very first time you ogled at a traumatizing porn everyone at school was talking about â this spot, worn from years of shared moments together is the very place you create some distance.
For the first time.
âI think I want my own party this year.â
The words land like a stone in still water, ripples of hurt crossing Luigi's face before he can master his expression.
For a moment, he looks eight years old again, standing in the tall grass with his first American birthday cake â the one your mom made because his parents were still learning that birthdays here meant homemade frosting, not elegant catered affairs and grand garden parties.
"Oh," he says, and it's the smallest you've ever heard his voice. "Yeah, of course. That makes sense. Weâre turning twenty-two. Not eight anymore.â His smile doesn't reach his eyes, hands fidgeting with the bracelet youâd made him years and years ago â the same nervous tell he's had since childhood. "Actually, Maâs been saying I should do something more â you know, formal this year anyway."
The lie sits between you like a third person.
Luigi, who once convinced his parents to move his elaborate garden party to your barn because you had the flu has never cared for formal anything.
You can see him rebuilding his walls, brick by careful brick, protecting himself the way he never had to with you before.
"Send me pictures though?" he adds lightly, but there's at least fifteen years of shared candles and off-key, bi-lingual singing wrapped in that request, fifteen years of your mom's chocolate cake and his maâs tiramisu side by side on the same table.
"Luigi, it's not-" you start, then pause, because it is exactly what he thinks it is. A separation. A gentle fracture. "I just need to figure out who I am without- without being part of a matched set. Does that make sense?"
The words feel clumsy in your mouth, inadequate to explain this need that's been growing since your acceptance letter arrived.
You watch him nod too quickly, the way he does when he's processing something that hurts.
The same way he looked when Benny, one of the milking cows had passed three summers ago, or the way he looked when you told him you couldnât go on the Mangione trip to Italy, desperately needing the vet clinic hours.
"My party's probably just going to be pizza with my study group anyway," you continue, trying to make it sound smaller than it is, even though you've already planned every detail â your first real birthday party that isn't shaped around accommodating both your worlds. "And you should do something spectacular. Twenty-two is a weird number, but you could make it your thing.â
He laughs, but it's his polite laugh, the one he uses at his father's business dinners. "Maybe I'll rent out that new rooftop place in the city," he says, playing along with this sudden pretense that the two of you haven't spent months quietly planning your joint party like every year before. "Very grown-up."
The space between you fills with unspoken memories â dual parties with increasingly ridiculous themes, the year you both got chicken pox and celebrated in quarantine together, or the year his mother hired a magician who pulled you both on stage as assistants.
Fifteen years of wishes and synchronized candle-blowing, and youâve put an abrupt end to it, with not so much as a warning.
"You're not mad?" you ask, even though you can see he is â not angry-mad, but hurt-mad, the kind that makes his shoulders tight and his smile too careful.
He stands abruptly, brushing invisible dirt from his shorts. "Mad? Nah, come on. We're not kids anymore." The words come out just a touch too fast, too light. "Actually, I should head back. Papa wanted to discuss something about the company tonight."
It's barely seven, and Marco's in New York City until Thursday â you both know this. But Luigi's already stepping back, that practiced social smile firmly in place, the one he uses when he needs to retreat but is too polite to say so.
"Night," he calls over his shoulder once he scales the side of the barn down to the grass again, hands shoved deep in his pockets.
You watch him walk away, his usual easy stride now stiff and measured, leaving you alone with just the sound of the bullfrogs near the pond, and the chickens settling in their coops for the night.
The sunset feels colder somehow, and you wrap your arms around your knees, trying to convince yourself this is what growing up looks like as you sit there until the mosquitoes start biting, watching the space where Luigi disappeared and wondering if this is what independence is supposed to feel like â this hollow victory that tastes nothing like freedom and everything like loss.
â˘
The late August evening slowly begins to melt into night, the air carrying whispers of autumn though summer still reigns.
You breathe in deep â catching hints of hay being baled in distant fields, leaves just beginning their subtle shift from green to gold, and lake water evaporating off sun-warmed skin. The pontoon boat hums steadily beneath you, loaded with friends sprawled across every available surface, their laughter echoing across the darkening water.
You'd done your best to prepare them all, carefully explaining the separate celebrations to avoid awkward questions.
But Luigi's absence feels like a shadow you can't shake â in the pause after every joke, in the empty space at the boat's stern where he always sat, in the way conversations drift and fade without his easy charm to bridge them.
You're learning that some people leave gaps too precisely shaped to fill, and you catch yourself waiting for sounds that aren't coming âthe full-bodied laughter that usually ricochets across the lake, the constant stream of Luigi's commentary that made even silence feel alive.
No one's standing at the boat's edge, goading others into increasingly ridiculous diving contests. The absence of these things sits heavy in your chest, like missing the last step on a familiar staircase.
"Good for you for doing your own thing this year," Mia offers, wine sloshing in her solo cup as she gestures vaguely. "Must be nice not having to compromise on everything for once."
Not really, you think.
The evening settles into dinner in the back garden, strings of lights casting warm halos over familiar faces â relatives, neighbors, friends who'd trickled in as the day aged and as if on cue, the peaceful scene splinters at the sound of tires on gravel and a booming voice that makes your stomach drop.
"Where's Luigi?!"
Cousin Tony's borrowed truck sits askew on the path, driver's door still swinging open like an afterthought.
He bounds toward you, one arm clutching what's clearly a wine bottle wrapped in what looks like yesterday's newspaper, his face bright with the anticipation of seeing his favorite duo.
The sight makes something in your chest twist.
Heâs always treated you both as his own blood, never drawing lines between family and chosen family.
You're crushed into a bear hug before you can dodge it, his familiar cologne mixing with engine grease as you try to breathe through compressed lungs, but heâs still calling for Luigi over your head, each shout making the other guests shift uncomfortably in their seats.
"He's somewhere in the city, Tone," you manage to wheeze out.
Your phone burns in your pocket, where Luigi's latest Instagram story sits unopened â some rooftop view you're deliberately not thinking about.
"What'da ya mean?" His grip loosens just enough for you to see his face fall, confusion creeping into his features like a slowly spreading stain.
"We're... trying something different this year," you say, words feeling clumsy as you glance over your shoulder at the laden table â a spread that still unconsciously includes all of Luigi's favorites alongside your own. The sight of his mother's recipe for stuffed shells sitting next to your grandmother's pierogies makes your throat tight.
"Well, is he at least comin' later?"
"No." The word falls between you like a stone. "He couldn't cancel his reservation without losing the booking fee, so I just told him it was fi-"
"No, no, mia cara," Tony drags his hands through his hair, face crumpling like you've just told him the world is ending. "Potrebbe essere l'ultimo!" The words tumble out in his rushed native tongue, his distress making him forget himself.
"You just said that in Italian." Your voice sounds far away, even to your own ears, like it's coming from the bottom of a well.
"Shit â It could be your last time, cuginetta." Tony's sigh seems to come from his bones as he pulls out his phone, cursing when he sees the no-service icon.
"My last time?"
Tony lifts his head slowly from his phone screen, eyes finding yours with a weight that makes your stomach drop. "What â oh, Dio â do you mean to say he has not told you?"
"Told me...?â You brace yourself, chest aching with a sudden, sharp regret for all those breakfast lessons with Luigi's nonna, her patient voice guiding you through pronunciations you'd carelessly let slip away between coffee and lunch.
"He got big'a job in the big city," Tony's hands sweep upward, as if trying to encompass the vastness of a metropolis that stretches far beyond any gesture could capture. "Saying bye-bye forever to smelly farm." His hands fall, and his expression softens into something dangerously close to pity. "Sorry.â
"Leaving? Like â he's moving there?" The words feel strange in your mouth.
You're standing in the same garden where you and Luigi once buried treasure maps at age eight, where you learned to cartwheel together at twelve, where you shared your first illegal beer at sixteen â and suddenly it all feels like archaeological evidence of something that's already gone.
"That's where zio Marco is now, making sure Princess Luigi has all the things he need there for â uhâ" Tony lapses into rapid Italian, but you've already stopped listening, the rest of his words fading into white noise.
You're hung up on the present tense of it all â Luigiâs father is there now, apartment hunting, setting up a brand new life while you stand here in your shared history, surrounded by people who apparently knew more about Luigi's future than you did.
The realization hits very suddenly.
Luigi was moving away, and he spoke not a word of it to you.
Tony manages a plate of food before borrowing your landline, desperate to track down Luigi in the sprawling city and when his truck finally crunches back down the gravel path, you feel it like a physical wound â as if he's taking a piece of you with him, torn straight from your core, yet, you maintain your composure with award-winning precision, a smile fixed firmly in place as guests filter away into the darkness.
You go through the motions, accepting kisses on cheeks, graciously receiving gifts labeled with just your name - no more Dynamic Duo or Thing 1 and 2 scrawled in familiar handwriting.
You help clear the garden, stack chairs, wash dishes that held food Luigi would have fought you for the leftovers of. You kiss your father's cheek goodnight, and tell your still-bustling mother you're heading out for some stargazing.
It's not entirely a lie.
You do end up beneath the stars, though you hadn't exactly planned to collapse here by the waterfront, where the distant dock creaks its lonely song, the splash of jumping fish and the bold croaking of nearby bullfrogs barely register â sounds that would normally make you jump now feel as distant as satellite signals.
You're lost in the undertow of your thoughts, barely noticing the warm tears tracking down your neck until your t-shirt is damp with evidence of a grief you didn't know you needed to prepare for â the silence holds you, envelopes you, and youâre almost convinced you can disappear here until-
"Hey, stranger."
His voice cuts through the cricket symphony like a knife, and you freeze, tears still wet on your face.
You don't turn around â can't turn around â because you know exactly what he'll look like: silhouetted against the moons full and distant glow, wearing that stupid designer jacket he bought last month that suddenly makes too much sense.
Big City boy.
The grass whispers beneath his feet as he approaches, each step measured like he's greeting a spooked animal.
It's funny â he used to just crash down beside you, all elbows and laughter.
When did you become something he had to be careful with?
"Tone called me," he says softly, still standing. "Said he found you but couldn't find me." There's a pause, heavy with unspoken words. "Told me other things, too."
The lake laps at the shore, a steady rhythm that used to calm you both on countless nights like this.
Now it just sounds like a countdown.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Your voice sounds small against the vastness of the lake, broken and confused, betrayed and disbelieving.
"Would it have changed anything?" His words come sharp, defensive. "Would you have suddenly decided to stay?"
"That's not fair."
"Fair?" The laugh that escapes him is bitter and unfamiliar. "You want to talk about fair? I watched you apply to every college more than fifty miles away. Watched you light up talking about leaving, about getting out. Never once askingâ" He cuts himself off, his gaze turning up instead at the trees that sway and rustle in the midnight air, a chill taking your spine.
"Asking what, Lu?â
"If I wanted to come with you." The words hang in the darkness between you. "If maybe I had dreams too, ones that didn't involve watching you disappear."
"I never said you couldn't-â
"What do you think I was going to do, wait around forever?" His voice cracks at the end, brittle and broken. "God, I've spent my whole life orbiting you like a personal Pluto. I don't even remember my life before you." He paces now like an agitated zoo animal behind a sheath of thin glass, just out of reach. âAnd yet, you expect me to stay here without you? While you go to college, make your own dreams come true?"
The moonlight catches his face as he turns, and you see something break in his expression. "I would have waited. I would have always waited, but fuckâ" His hands tremble as they rake through his hair. "You've pushed and pushed and pushed me away. Every college application, every excited story about your future somewhere else, the party -â he watches as you stand, your posture ridged and nervous, but attentive.
"Lu, please -â
"So what do I do?" His voice drops lower, trembling. "I have to think of myself too. I have to accept that we won't always be this way." He watches as you scrub your hands over your face, your unsteady legs carrying you off the dock.
The cool, damp grass beneath your feet becomes an anchor, something real in a moment that feels anything but.
He follows, his body angled toward yours like a compass finding north. "But it didn't have to be like this." His voice softens to barely above a whisper, his dress shoes crushing the grass with each step.
"Well, what exactly did you expect?" You whirl around, wiping furiously beneath your eyes, moonlight catching the tears on your cheeks that refuse to be unseen. "We were going to play in the river forever? Did you think we'd just find our way without ever trying?" The words come out harder than you mean them, sharp with the kind of anger that's really just fear in disguise.
"I- you-" Luigi's voice breaks.
His eyes are bloodshot, the bridge of his nose red from earlier tears hastily wiped away in the party bathroom. In the half-light, he looks both younger and older than your shared twenty-two years â a boy trying to hold onto something slipping through his fingers, a man facing his first real loss.
"You know, maybe it might have been that easy for you, Lu." Your eyes drift to the Mangione Mansion, its windows gleaming like jewels against the dark hills, an anomaly among the endless cornfields. "You never had to lift a finger â it always just..." You gesture vaguely, bitterly. "Fell into place."
The words taste like copper in your mouth, sharper for how unfair they feel.
Because he's always shared everything.
Those lavish family dinners where his mother insisted you sit next to her, those delicate necklaces from Rome that he'd drape around your neck with careful fingers, those shopping trips where his nonna would press dresses into your arms with a conspirator's wink.
He's never once made you feel like charity.
But there are some things that can't be shared, some advantages that run deeper than generosity.
While you pieced together credits between evening classes and online courses, fighting for every inch of progress, he'd come home rolling his eyes at another Harvard letter, another Yale recruiter calling.
You take a deep breath, feeling the summer air fill your lungs, and air that smells like it always has, like corn silk and cut grass and the all-consuming night. "Did you think we'd just stay here in our bubble, Lu?" Your voice softens despite yourself. "The only place we've ever known?"
All he can do is stand there, helpless, caught between a nod and denial.
His expression crumples into something raw and pleading â such a far cry from the boy who, just last week, had painted patterns across your skin with river mud, both of you laughing until your sides hurt.
The same boy whom you could communicate with without even speaking to, who knew exactly how you took your coffee, who was born the day before you, and who could read your silences like a book he'd memorized; yet now he's looking at you like you're written in a language he never learned to speak.
"No." The word propels you forward, feet moving before your brain catches up.
His face softens into something unbearable â like watching a star collapse in slow motion, finally understanding that this isn't just another one of your theoretical late-night talks about the future.
His carefully constructed composure crumbles, leaving behind something young and scared and achingly real.
"I love you." The words fall from his lips like muscle memory, like breathing, like the thousands of times before â whispered against your hair during movies, shouted across parking lots, mumbled sleepily during long car rides. But now they land heavy between you, a weight pressing against your chest until it hurts to breathe. "I always have, and I always willâ"
"No. No, Lu." Your voice cracks on his name, and your pace quickens, bare feet crushing grass beneath desperate steps.
But he matches you stride for stride.
âMy life has been so intertwined with yours, when you began to pull away - I- I panicked,â He was rambling now, quick and out of breath but keeping up with you nonetheless, the two of you navigating the vast property, moon and starlight the only thing guiding your path. âI settled on what I knew would be easiest,â
âThatâs the problem.â You stop again to look at him, your chest heaving. âYou donât need to settle, Lu â youâre brilliant, youâre so fucking brilliant-â he grabs your wrists gently, taking several steps to close the gap between you.
"I have never settled on you." Luigi's voice goes rigid, cracking in the middle like ice breaking over deep water. Each word carries the weight of years â shared secrets, dreams whispered under blanket forts, and promises made in tree houses. "You have always been my first option."
You catch your breath, the familiar warmth of his hands on your wrists suddenly feeling like shackles.
Your head shakes, slow and deliberate, as you try to pull back â but his grip steadfast remains. "How would you know of the other options?" The question comes out softer than you mean it to, weighted with everything you've both been too scared to say. "Do you know yourself without me?â
"I don't want to know myself without you."
"Luigi. Please stop-â You wrench your wrists from his loosened grip, your feet carrying you forward through the night but he follows, like an echo you can't shake, like a shadow that refuses to fade with distance.
His words tumble out faster now, chasing the shrinking space between you and home, visible through the wavering corn stalks like a lighthouse warning of rough water ahead. "I know I'm not â I know I'm not Matthew Williams, or that guy that works the stables near the Bradshaws. And I know Iâm not a perfect man, butâ"
You stop once again, so abruptly this time he nearly collides with you, turning to face this strange new version of Luigi â one you've never seen before, one who wears his insecurities like an ill-fitting suit.
He's brave, you'll give him that, but he's also terrified in a way that makes your chest ache.
This boy who's never had to compete for anything in his life, suddenly listing off names like entries in a contest he thinks he's losing.
"You stop that." Your finger jabs at his chest, connecting with the expensive fabric of his jacket. "You are the most-the most magnificent person I have ever met, Luigi. And you're not perfect, no-â You swallow against the rising bile, against the irony of having to defend him to himself when you're the one walking away. "But you're honest, and you're good â a goddamn great deal too good for me."
The last part comes out like a confession, like something you've carried so long it's carved itself into your bones â the real reason you're running, the fear that someday he'll wake up and realize it too.
The night holds its breath around you, your ragged exhales mixing with his in the space between heartbeats, and the trees shiver their leaves like witnesses to your undoing, crickets falling silent as if they too understand the gravity of this moment â this closing act.
"But-â You step into his warmth, drawn forward like a moth to flame, even now, knowing it would burn. Youâre close enough to catch the familiar scent of his cologne mixing with fresh-cut grass and summer sweat. Close enough to see the moonlight catching in his eyelashes. Close enough to break both your hearts properly. "I can't love you the way you deserve to be loved."
The words tear themselves from your throat like barbed wire, each syllable drawing blood.
Your stomach twists inside out, acid creeping up your throat again, "I can't love you like that. Iâm - Iâm so, so sorry, Luigi â I just - I canât,
His hands find your face with the reverence of a prayer, thumbs brushing across your cheekbones like he's trying to memorize the geography of your skin. "Listen to me," he whispers, his voice thick with desperation. "Listen."
The tenderness in his touch nearly breaks you â the way his fingers tremble against your jaw, the gentle circles he traces beneath your ears, the familiar callous on his right thumb from his tree-climbing habit.
His forehead drops to rest against yours, and you can feel his breath hitching, unsteady and warm against your lips.
"You've already loved me better than anyone else ever could," Luigi's voice cracks, splintering like ice in early spring. "You love me exactly as I am â not the heir, not the prodigy, not the Mangione name." His hands slide into your hair, âYou have loved me even though I canât remember to help feed the hens, but I can recite every constellation. And youâve loved me even though I name every cull cow â even though you think itâs cruel.â
He pulls back just enough to meet your eyes, and the raw hope in his gaze is almost unbearable. "Please," he breathes, the word more air than sound. "Please don't decide for both of us what kind of love I deserve." His thumbs catch the tears you didn't realize were falling, smearing them across your cheeks like war paint. "Let me choose.â
âThen choose someone else!â You shake your hands at him, helpless and wishing to disappear. âI - Iâm so unsure of myself - every goddamn thing I do, Luigi. I break everything, Iâm useless at being a homemaker. Iâm awkward, Iâm a black sheep, even all the way out here.â
You arenât made for the big city like he is.
The moonlight catches in his dark eyes, turning them to liquid as they search yours. "I don't need perfect love. I don't need textbook romance or fairy tale." His voice breaks, raw with honesty. "I just need you. But - but I canât live like this forever" Heâs speaking faster than youâve ever heard the smooth-talking, easy going Luigi say anything.
You try to turn away, to escape the weight of his words, but his touch holds you steady â gentle but unwavering. "Luigi â let me the fuck-â
"No," he breathes, the word ghosting across your lips. "No, don't push me away because you think you're protecting me. Don't make decisions about what I can handle." His fingers thread through your hair, cradling the back of your head. "I choose this. I choose the messy parts, the broken parts, the parts you think are unlovable. I choose all of it."
I am stopping this here. Love you đ
#req#luigi mangione x reader#luigi mangione fanfic#also thanks so so much for the compliments anon!! Iâm here to serve you
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logan howlett nsfw alphabet â
Ëâ⧠đ â§âË â
self explanatory, posting this in the meantime as i finish my other 2 oneshots ! ! <3 thank yâall for being patient too
A = Aftercare (what theyâre like after sex)
this man looooves aftercare, heâs a big cuddler & will defo spoon his partner after, even stay inside for a little if they ask him to.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partnerâs)
he loves his partnerâs body, head to toe. heâs a rough man, but once he likes and gets attached to someone he could literally spend hours worshipping their body. if he really had to choose though, it would be either stomach or face. he loves even gently touching their face, feeling it nuzzled against his neck, and even cumming all over it â seeing it messy with his fluids. stomach, no matter if itâs flat or soft and pudgy, heâll love it. love when itâs flat, seeing how little they are, the perfect bulge of his dick stretching them out, and pudgy when he can lay his head there comfortably and hold it. on his own body, he doesnât like much, he knows heâs a fairly attractive man and isnât insecure by any means â but more for the fact that heâs scared to hurt his partner instead of bring pleasure with how much bigger he is.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
his would taste bitter (from all the beer he drinks obviously) and i feel like with age old man loganâs would also be like that. but, for example in origins when he doesnât drink as much, it is a tad sweeter. as for cum play, or where he likes to finish, he likes to cum inside his partner when he has the chance. if he doesnât, heâll settle for pulling out and finishing on their stomach or thighs. he also looves facials, so heâll take advantage of that during oral.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
heâll definitely never admit to it, but if youâre his partner and he canât have you, even just for a day, for example if heâs away on a mission â heâll take a pair of your underwear with him and fuck into it. itâs pathetic, reason why heâll never admit it, but itâs the closest thing he has to you.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what theyâre doing?)
anyone who says this man doesnât know what heâs doing ⌠what are yâall on . heâs been alive for more than a century, even more so knowing heâs a player, (we all know heâs dicked down more people than he can count), so i mean pretty self explanatory how good he is in bed. thereâs a reason all the x-men want that !
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
he loooves any position. anything his partner wants, mostly because he knows heâll end up taking control, so the least he could do for them is fuck them in a position they want. but if he could choose, itâd either be mating press or cowgirl. mating press because he loves feeling close to his partner, buried inside, and cowgirl because itâs one of the few, if not only times, he does end up losing a bit of the control. (we all know it ends with him fucking up into his partner but anywho)
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
if heâs really comfortable with his partner, sure. heâll give a little chuckle instead of an annoyed grunt when his belt gets stuck whilst in the process of taking it off for example, or laugh if they wake up any of the neighbors with the noiseâ other than that, in general though, heâs soft, but not very humorous.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
only trims. and thatâs like, once every 2 weeks. i mean the manâs basically a beast you canât blame himđ however if it bothers his partner heâll make an effort to keep it better trimmed.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
like i said before, heâs more soft than humorous in the moment. heâll take his time easing into his partner and reassure them, make sure theyâre okay. but this is in the case if heâs not in heat, or if heâs not angry/pent up.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
heâll try to avoid jerking off when he can, for example if heâs not in a committed relationship heâll find someone quick to fuck, but if he is⌠well, then he doesnât really have any other choice.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
praise kink lord !! he looooves praising his partner, and secretly loves when itâs done to him too. obviously though, heâd never admit to this either, or to the fact that heâs a huge sucker for pain too/a masochist.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
bedroom when he has the chance, because he wants to have his partner spread out and comfortable. if not, he can settle for anything really. desk, bathroom, couch, as long as theyâre comfortable.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
showing off skin gets him going. if he sees his partner in just boxers or panties, even with a t-shirt on, it gets him going. especially if theyâll straddle him or get on his lap. teasing gets him too, for example subtle teases like grazing his thigh, or groping his muscles. he loooves when his partner gropes his muscles â thatâs just begging to be manhandled and ravaged onto the bed by him.
N = No (something they wouldnât do, turn offs)
has few turn offs. heâs basically tried everything in his life, so a lot doesnât phase him. whatever you donât want though, he wonât push and wouldnât do.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
this man is the king of eating his partnerâs out, let me tell you !!! he knows exactly what to do, how to tease and start ⌠and he knows how good he is. he loves having his partnerâs thighs squeezing around his head and or tugging his hair (did i mention he had a pain kink?) and feeling their thighs quiver while he presses them against the bed. he definitely prefers to give rather than receive, but he doesnât mind getting a good blowjob once in a while.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
slow and sensual most of the time. heâll get fast and rough if heâs pent up or needy, or if his partner teases him. but most of the time, heâs too scared to hurt them.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
loves quickies. of course, he loves taking his time with his partners too, but heâs never one to turn down a quick fuck, especially if itâs his partner who initiates it.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
heâs risky, likes the thrill of it all, and heâs definitely down to experiment.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
the man can go for so many rounds. like, if his partnerâs still able to walk without limping after? then he hasnât done a good enough job in his opinion. it depends on how much his partner wants to go, but he is down to go until they safe word if they want to as well, as he rarely tires out.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
thinks toys are pathetic (let me remind you this is the same man that fucks his partnerâs underwear but okay), as youâll never catch him with a fleshlight or anything of the sort. if he catches his partner with something though, heâll get a little upset at the fact he wasnât able to fully pleasure them, but heâll let them keep it â just wonât use it on them when heâs there.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
loves to tease. tease, foreplay, anything, he loves it. what he really loves to do is also grind/rut against his partner to get them into it or keep them on edge, and sometimes (this goes with female partners) heâll fuck his female parters through their little panties, messing them up with all his precum. (can you tell this man has a thing for underwear??)
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
grunts and groans a lot. pants too, especially when in a rut. but he tries to keep his own sounds down, as he prefers hearing his partnerâs moans filling the room.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
loves physical touch and words of affirmation. in the bedroom, heâs always the one holding and praising his partner, which, he loves of course â but he also doesnât mind being held or even when they do things like play with his hair. he never really got that from any of his other partners, and heâll never admit it but he really does like being taken care of.
X = X-ray (letâs see whatâs going on under those clothes)
alright, we all know this manâs basically all muscle. but going lower ?? yâall are not ready for the description iâm boutta give.
8.5 when soft, 9 when hard. girth is 3 inches at least. his tip gets a rosy color flush when hard, and he leaks a LOT of precum, especially when in heat. youâre welcome.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
he yearns a lot for his partner, just craves physical touch like i said before. as for his sex drive, itâs very high. basically, whenever his partnerâs up for it, heâs up for it. (basically all the time, since he tends to want someone who yearns for him as much as he yearns for them).
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
he usually doesnât fall asleep before his partner. he wants to know theyâre safe and hold and cuddle them, take care of them and clean them up. only then can he rest.
#hugh jackman#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine xmen#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you
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I want to preface my reply here with the understanding that I agree with you on how a lot of these *are* double standards. But at the same time⌠I think there is a *legitimate* criticism laid against Cassie that I feel is being brushed off here. And when I say âcriticismâ I mean âcharacter flaw she hasâ, in the same way that one could criticize Visser Three for being evil; it makes her character more complex, makes the book better, and itâs not bad to have!
But her decision to put Aftran in her head, to let Tom escape with the morphing cube, genuinely do put the whole world at risk. More than anyone else on the team, she struggles to set aside the close-to-her people instead of the world. In Percy Jackson, his fatal flaw was supposedly âloyaltyâ- heâd let the world burn for his friends. I donât think that flaw was managed well there, but it reminds me of Cassie in theory.
Putting Aftran in her head to save Karen was a bad decision. It worked out really well, and I understood why she did it, and I donât think that it makes her a Mary Sue that it worked out. Thatâs one of my utterly favorite books in the series. I love its message. *And* I think it was a bad decision. I think it put everyone else at risk, and the correct thing to do with the information she had at the time would have been to let Karen die rather than become a controller herself, and I think Cassie is the only one of the Animorphs who would have made that decision at that point in the war. Brushing this off as âThe alternative was killing a 6-year old girl, and that tells us more about you than it does about herâ is disingenuous, I think. Killing Karen *would* have been deeply deeply unpleasant, Iâd have hated it, all of them would have hated it. But between âkilling a six year old girlâ and âexposing my entire team so that the whole planet falls to a life in slaveryâ, I know which one Iâd pick, even if I *really wish a third option existed*. Itâs a very legitimate thing to be upset with a character about, *even if* itâs incredibly realistic and very hard for anyone to do.
Similarly, the decision in book 50 to let Tom get away with the morphing cube- it worked out well, but it put the whole war at risk, and with the information she had it was the wrong decision. I think she is a *better character* for it; I think the story is better for it; I love Cassie. But I donât think itâs unreasonable to say that at that point in the war, no other Animorph would have taken that risk, and I donât think itâs sexism to say âI think that that was a bad decision and this is my least favorite character as a result.â (And side note, she isnât my least favorite character.)
They need her. They need someone to stand up for whatâs right, to keep them from going too far. But she is *more likely* to go too far in the opposite direction than any of them. And thatâs not a double standard; Iâd be upset with any of them who knowingly took an action of that magnitude of risk. The others didnât- except Jake, who gave up on the war in MM4, and Iâm upset with him for doing that for exactly the same reasons. (With the exception of Nice Rachel in book 32 and Marco in book 42, both of which get passes for being literally brain damaged at the time.)
A similar thing goes for Rachel too, but a more interesting one here. Ax absolutely is bloodthirsty, and Iâd even say *more* bloodthirsty than her. But the *narration* calls out Rachel as being the bloodthirsty one, over and over again. âAx, get Rachelâ, not âRachel, get Axâ. Book 48 (which I love as a character study) is all about how Rachel reacts to the constant way the others treat her as bloodthirsty; we donât get a similar book for Ax because they *donât* treat him that way despite him being the one to suggest, e.g., flushing the Yeerks in 53, letting them starve in 7 without concern for the hosts.
So I think there absolutely is a sexism of sorts going on here, but I think itâs happening *in-universe too*, and I think a lot of people *out-of-universe* form their opinions based off of what the characters themselves think without doing deeper analysis to see what biases the characters have. And so I donât think a discussion about this is complete without mentioning that aspect too.
So I'm putting together an In Defence of Cassie PowerPoint for a PowerPoint night with friends. Do you have any arguments for or against her? I trust your opinion and am curious.
Let's see.
"She's too powerful, too unique, too far-seeing, and not good enough for Jake! What a Mary Sue!"
Counterpoint: May I introduce you to the reigning champion fan favorite, Sad White Boy Tobias?
Only nothlit ever to regain the ability to morph
Only known human-andalite hybrid ever to exist
Regarded as savior by entire hork-bajir species
Entire existence is a time paradox the war hinges upon
Pulls the canonically "most beautiful girl in our grade", who turns down 6 or 7 other offers in favor of Bird Boy
Correctly predicted planetary ecology 65 million years in advance
Believed to be immune to 2-hour limit
In conclusion: y'all wouldn't be crying "Mary Sue" if Cassie was a sad white boy, and I can prove it.
"She's too weak and hand-wringing, and she never helps the war effort!"
Counterpoint: First of all, the fact that the same people say this in the same breath as "she's too powerful" is... telling. Secondly:
She saved the entire team's lives in #24, in #29, in #44, and in MM1, among others.
Specifically calling out #44 â that ending shows she is willing and able to be ruthless when her friends are in need. She doesn't like slaughtering human-controllers, but if the alternative is everyone she loves dying, then she'll fucking well do it.
Much like Jake (see: Sad White Boy), she's more willing to risk herself than her friends, hence the end of MM1
Her medical knowledge saves Marco from rabies, Ax from brain!appendicitis, and Tobias from bird flu.
Her survivalist knowledge saves everyone in #25 (the Arctic), MM2 (Cretaceous Era), #11 (rainforest), and #14 (desert).
In conclusion: Cassie's only idealistic-looking by the standards of this extremely morally gray team.
"She's so unfair to Jake!"
Counterpoint: Jake? The Jake who refused to speak with her for weeks? Jake who proposes marriage while they're still broken up? Jake who announces he'll never trust Cassie again because she [checks notes] saved his brother's life? That Jake?
Also:
She gives him tons of emotional support in #16, #21, #47, and other times he's feeling low.
They have a healthy argument where they air differences and come to an understanding in #9.
Did I mention he doesn't just dump her but ghosts her in the middle of the war's endgame?
They're teenagers. Their relationship isn't perfect, but it is built on open communication and mutual respect which is more than Rachel and Tobias can say
She's fighting a war, and PTSD for that matter. No, she doesn't have infinite emotional bandwidth.
In conclusion: Their relationship is fine, their breakup is mutual, and her behavior only looks bad if, once again, you're holding Cassie to a different standard than you are Jake.
"She shouldn't have trusted Aftran!"
Counterpoint: friendly reminder that the alternative was killing a 6-year-old for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. If that's what you think Cassie should've done, that tells us more about you than about her.
"She spends too much time moralizing!"
Counterpoint: this is a book series about war, not a friggin' video game. If you want moral pornography, go play Call of Duty. If you want sci fi realism, then you're going to have to accept that a majority of humans prefer not to kill their fellow humans if at all possible.
"She's a ripoff of [insert character here]!"
Counterpoint: literally every single one of these says more about the commenter than about the source work. "Every dystopia is set in the U.S." is the kind of thing only people who only read books by American authors would think. "All epic fantasy is Eurocentric" => tell me you only read books by white people without telling me. I'm glad you think Cassie is too similar to Willow Rosenberg, but there are at least 6 other stories in the known world, and I hear some of them even feature sweet/dorky/caring characters who are secretly ultra-powerful.
In conclusion: You don't have to like Cassie as a (fictional) person, but 85% of criticisms directed at her are bad-faith attacks on one of the 1990s' only fat Black female gnc ultra-powerful superheroes.
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đđĄđ đđđŹđ đ¨đ đđŹ - ft Se mi x freader 18 +
Description: Story is based off an apocalyptic game. You and Se mi stumble across a pot basement and get carried away. There, Se mi realises she has a 'daddy kink'.
đśđşđđđđđđ: smoking weed , smut, dirty talk, fingering , use of dildo, being high , soft dom! Se mi, sub! freader
"đđ¤ đ¤đŁ đđđ§đĄđđŁđ, đđŞđ˘. đžđŞđ˘ đđ¤đ§ đ˘đ đ'đ˘ đđĄđ¤đ¨đ đŠđ¤đ¤..! đžđ§đđđ˘ đ¤đŁ đŠđđđ¨ đđđđ đđ¤đ§ đ˘đ đ§đđđđŠ đŁđ¤đŹ".
Your mind was already in the clouds, already forgetting about the reason as to why you're both here. To collect supplies and scout the area.
Yet here you were, fucking in a basement full of weed at an abandoned school.
Supplies were running dangerously low so You and Se mi were sent to get some more. Along with a scouting the new area to check for more of the 'infected'.
Mounting your horses, you both set out at dawn, beyond the gates of Jackson. It was about midday when you finally arrived at said location that your boss had give you.
The women next to you was your partner Se mi. She wore a brown leather jacket with padding inside paired with worn out jeans. You on the other hand wore a long dark trench coat with a winter hat and thick grey jeans.
No scouts had checked this area yet so you both were sent here to investigate and bring back sufficient supplies.
"So chief, what do you think? Looks like the area isn't swarmed with infected yet." Se mi pointed out while she stops beside you with her chestnut brown horse.
Rolling your eyes at the ravenette, you carefully examine the map in your hands. "Look, I'm sure they're still here. They might be hiding somewhere."
Unfortunately your hunch was correct. A small hoard of infected indeed have been hiding underneath the gaps of the houses.
They had awakened after hearing the noises from the horses. Having no choice, you both had barred yourselves in an abandoned school after successfully killing a handful of the 'zombies' on the way there.
"Shit that was close," you huffed as you bring out your torchlight and then grabbed Se mi's hand.
"Maybe we can find the break room and turn the generator on. Get some rest and stock up on supplies then leave. How does that sound?"
Se mi was too focused on you holding her hand since you usually don't initiate in skinship unless you wanted to. Smiling to herself, she gives your hand a light squeeze.
"Yeah sure, just don't get scared shitless if an infected happened to sneak in ", she snickered as you huffed in annoyance.
"Way to ruin the mood", you shook your head in disappointment as you both make your way further into the desolate building.
"You still love me though."
It took a while to reach the basement but you eventually did. You both were in shock as you descend the wooden planks of the stairs.
"Holy shit! There's pot down here?"Se mi whisper shouted, just in case somebody heard them.
There were mini greenhouses full of weed and someone's personal belongings scattered everywhere.
You hastily made your way to the breakers and turn the lights and heating on. " You think Old man Richie lives here?", you suggested as you look at some items and papers with charts scattered on a desk.
"Hmm probably, idk I haven't seen him in a while," Se mi says with a rolled up blunt in her mouth, already lighting it.
"You gotta be kidding me, there's no way you're trying to get high now. We're supposed to be looking for supplies!," you huffed as you went to grab the blunt from in between Se mi's lips.
She had already taken a huge drag and blowing it out. The strong smell of weed hung in the air, making you scrunch your nose. You weren't really a huge fan of it. Sw mi knew ofcourse but she's just being a little shit.
"Since we're here we might as well have some fun," Se mi drawled as she pulls you closer to her. You had to cover her mouth with your hand to block the smell from reaching your nose.
"Uh uh , not after having that crap-", you exclaimed before getting cutoff by Se mi. She quickly grabbed hold of your wrist, and brang your hand to her chest. Her heart rate had increased as you look up to see that her eyes had begun to dliate.
"See this? This is how you're making me feel right now. Absolutely crazy," Se mi pointed out as her voice goes on octave deeper. Leaning down she lightly grazes your lips with hers as your breath hitches. She glances into your eyes, silently asking for your permission.
Seeing as there was no way out of this, you gave in. Pressing your lips against hers with fervent as you reach up to entangle you fingers into her raven hair. You tug at it gently, pulling out a low groan from Se mi as she deepens the kiss.
Her lips were slightly chapped but it didn't bother you as much, they were still soft. Tasting the weed on her tongue as she slowly backs you up to the sofa behind you.
Yelping as soon as she picks you up behind your legs and plops you down onto the soft cushions. They were slightly dirty but that wasn't really on your mind right now. Se mi had crawled ontop of you to pull you in for another heated kiss. Whispering sweet nothings againgst your lips while you let out soft moans. Bucking up mindlessly against her hips.
"Daddy please-," you unexpectedly let out making Se mi stop for a second. Her eyes slowly turned dark from lust as she asks you to repeat what you just said. Blinking in confusion you think back to what you said.
"Daddy please...?", Se mi sat there , sinking in the given pet name and something in her snapped. She's never been called that before, but she likes it. She really likes it.
Quickly stripping you, she left you in just your underwear. Burying her face into your neck to leave harsh kisses and bites all along your supple skin. She rips off your bra before attaching her lips onto your erected nipples, sucking and swirling around both buds carefully.
Her hand reaches down towards your heat, already feeling a wet spot on your underwear.
"Huh.. that wet for me already? Just from a few kisses?" She chuckles darkly as she removes the dainty piece of clothing onto the floor beside you.
You feel her push in her index finger into you, slowly, making sure you would feel every inch of her girthy finger. The feeling of her fingers stretching you oh so deliciously got you drooling - fuck even Se mi seemed to be enjoying this more than you. Picking up the pace, she was practically fucking you with her rough fingers. Abusing your sopping wet cunt while mindlessly sucking your boob's, taking turns on each one.
Her pace never once faltered, not when you looked so good when throwing your head back in pleasure and moaning out her name. Se mi, bit each and every inch of skin she could reach, while her fingers remained curled inside you. You were so close.
"Shit Se mi! Gonna cum - please I'm gonna..-"
"Do it. Cum all over my fingers baby" she hissed as she looks down at you through her lashes. Admiring your ruined form with a lazy smirk.
Just like that you saw white. You came so fucking hard from just her fingers, panting and trembling slightly as she helped you ride your orgasm. Until she pulls out her strap tucked underneath her jeans. " wha-- why do you have that on?", you manage to breathe out as she gently taps the plastic onto your stimulated pussy.
"Eh, idk just felt like it," she shrugged as you place you head back onto the armrest of the couch. "That's really dirty of you, you know that right-?". Your breath caught in your throat as she pushes her length into your tight warm cunt. It's been a while since she's fucked you, so deep down, you were excited.
With her hands bruising your ass, she latches her lips onto your left nipple, repeating the action as her dick fucked you deep and slow. You reach down to rest your hand on her cheek and led her into a messy kiss, she responded by pushing her tongue past your lips. Exploring each and every corner of your mouth inside.
The room filled with the smell of weed, sweat and sex as the two of you made out. Se mi smirked againgst your lips as you whine in frustration because she was going too slow.
"What's wrong princess? You want me to go faster?" She muses as you nod profusely.
"Use your words~"
"Please daddy, I want you to go faster...!" Like a flick of a switch, her hands gripped your hips, before thrusting into you. She buckled her hips into you , her dick bruising your cervix and making your velvet walls tighten around her.
"Good girl...", she whispers into your ear as she begins to ruin you.
Her fingers left marks on your skin, she reached up to grope your breasts while kissing you lazily. The weed coming into affect yet again, all while pounding your poor dripping pussy.
Her dick kept on sliding in and out of you while you guys made out on the couch. Smirking proudly at your breathless moans and cries of pleasure. You looked heavenly to her, your wispy hair fell messily around your head like a halo, and your cheeks were tinted a rosy pink.
"That's it gorgeous, keep making those sounds for me only. You like me pounding you like this? Like when I turn you into a mess?"
Oh the way she makes you crumble beneath her touch. How were you supposed to answer when she was fucking you so deeply that you've become dumbed out?
You moaned rather loudly as she presses down on the bulge her dick made on your stomach. Whimpering slightly as you scrape her toned back with your nails, feeling another orgasm approach.
"You gonna cum for me babe? I'm close too, go on cum on this dick! Cream on this dick for me right now".
Her pace quickened yet again and was pounding into you impossibly deeper. Burying the strap deep inside you 'till none of it could be seen visibly. Her grip on you was merciless as you moaned into her mouth, finally letting your orgasm wash out.
With one last harsh thrust into your dripping wet cunt, she bit down onto your neck as she too releases her cum into the plastic dildo attached to her. Your legs trembled once you came on her dick. The aftershocks from your orgasm stayed a while as you both lay together on the couch with Se mi resting ontop of you.
"Damnn, that was hot. Didn't know you had it in you darling," she shakily breathed out with a proud smile on her face, as the affect from the weed had slowly began to wear off.
"So...smart ass, how're we gonna get cleaned up?" You say after a while, crossing your arms across your chest. Glaring at her with a raised eyebrow.
"Hey calm down, I'm sure the old geezer has a shower down here. Don't worry, we'll figure it out".
Pressing soft kisses all over your face and across the dark marks across your body. She slowly starts getting you both dressed.
At the end of the day, she only cares about you and your wellbeing. So soft aftercare is must after a long session like this.
"Next time don't smoke infront of me, at least not on missions."
"Sure thing princess, anything for you".
Ps: I know this is short but I hope you enjoyed it!
@mattm1964
#squid game#squid game x reader#squid game season 2#se mi x reader#player 380 x reader#squid game smut#ang3ltine
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completely disregarding retcons/errors from HoO, aka the series full of both internal and external inconsistency, I wanna talk about Luke cause it is literally a constantly battle in the fandom of what the hell is up with Luke. And as somebody who likes to rattle Luke around like a six year old with a headless barbie I would like people to stop yelling about misinterpreting a very simple scene after like 15 years.
So here's my breakdown. it's quite simple: Yes, when Luke was dying, he was asking if Annabeth was in love with him romantically. This has absolutely nothing to do with Luke's own feelings. Luke very explicitly did NOT love Annabeth romantically. This is established many times over. Seriously go read Demigod Diaries or something.
Luke was asking if Annabeth was in love with him because he had already caused her so much pain, he couldn't die peacefully if he knew he was about to break her heart on top of it all. He wasn't implying he had any thoughts of reciprocating it. He was just asking permission from Annabeth to die, through the lens of "Will it absolutely ruin your life right now if I kick the bucket?" because if it was going to, then he wouldn't want to. Annabeth reassured him she'd be fine if he died and he went "alright cool peace out âď¸." It was not at all related to Luke's own feelings towards Annabeth. Her opinion of him mattered, mostly in "I care if you will be hurt by this," but he did not feel romantically towards her.
Now HoO has one (1) line that implies Luke did like Annabeth, but HoO also gets Literally Everything Wrong, including making simple errors within like 3 chapters of itself, and given it is retroactive, regardless we can pretty definitively disregard it.
Also like, the meta reason for that scene, and also the Rachel scenes like two minutes later is entirely to clear the air for Percabeth to happen. Like, it's literally just to have an excuse for Annabeth go to "No I conveniently don't have any hang-ups about previous romantic feelings I didn't have that may impede me dating the protagonist" followed immediately by Rachel going "Percy btw as your secondary love interest: I am explicitly unavailable now. Go date Annabeth." Like that's the other purpose there and why those scenes follow each other at the end of TLO. It's just wrapping up loose ends for the romance subplot and confirming that the tension between Luke and Percy in Annabeth's life that Percy had built up was not real and didn't need to be further addressed.
#pjo#riordanverse#luke castellan#analysis#this one has been collecting dust in the drafts for a bit#sorry i saw an actually good luke crimes post today from someone not in the TA side of the fandom#which is rare cause usually outside of TA side of the fandom like 90% of Luke talk is hate#and it reminded me that i had this in my drafts. like i DO wanna make fun of Luke's crimes#but i wanna make fun of like. the stuff Luke actually did. like ditch his brother in the hell maze or try to feed Annabeth to a bear#dude had a weird vendetta against Grover probably over Thalia. local teen has intense one-sided beef with a goat
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my baby, my baby (youâre my baby)
Summary: darry visits his dad and rants. he also cries. </3
Darrel loves each of his kids (and stray kids) equally. No matter how hard Steve tries to pry it out of him, he does not have a favorite.
He loved when Johnny came over for dinner and heâs able to convince the kid to spend the night, he loves when Soda and Steve came home with new stories about their day at the rodeo, he loved when he came home from work and Ponyboy would rush to tell him about the book heâd just finished, he loved attending Aceâs recitals, and he loved when Dally comes over just to sit in their company when he couldâve been causing a ruckus around town instead.
He is, however, a little more partial to his first born than the others. No hard feelings, he still loves his other kids, but Darrel Junior was his first child; the reason heâs the father he was a father, so heâs always going to have a soft spot for him no matter what he does.
Besides, it doesnât hurt that Junior is the only one who visits him and Karen on a normal basis. Darrel huffs to himself has he sits on top of his grave. Since dying, heâs somehow gained an internal watch, so he knows itâs 3:47pm exactly; when Junior visits itâs usually around 4pm.
Juniorâs early today though, Darrel thinks to himself hearing footsteps approaching. Thereâs not much else he can do but wait for Darry who bends in front of Karenâs grave and leaves her a flower first. If he were alive, Darrelâs heart mightâve clenched. Karenâll be sorry he missed Darry, but sheâs watching over the other boys right now; itâs alright though, Darrel will fill her in when she gets back.
Darryâs head was bent too low for him to get a good look at first, but now that heâs turned towards Darrelâs grave he can see the tears streaming down his face. If he still needed oxygen, heâs sure his breath wouldâve caught.
âHi, Dad,â Darryâs says taking a seat on the ground. Darrel canât help but notice heâs got his knees pulled to him like heâs trying to protect himself.
He frowns and pulls himself to join Darry on the ground. Hey, kiddo. Whatâs the matter? He knows Darry canât hear him, he learnt that the hard way a while ago now, it still brings him a little bit of comfort though.
Darry sniffs. âI donât know how you and Mama did it.â
Did what?
Darry gestures in the air, âThis parenting shit- stuff, I meant stuff, sorry.â Darrel laughs a little; his babyâs twenty years old and still apologizing for cussing.
If heâs honest, Darrel isnât even sure how he did it. It was in large part thanks to Karen, of course, she kept him steady whenever he floundered. Junior also helped too, though. He doesnât like to throw the word around, but for all intent and purposes, Darry was a perfect first child.
âThe other night,â Darry continues. âI guess Ponyboy had a nightmare or something, I donât know, but I heard him asking Soda why I hated him.â His voice breaks at the end and Darrel is forced to watch as Junior sobs into his arms.
Itâs futile he knows, but after a moment of watching he hugs Darry anyway. Almost as if he could actually feel the hug, Darry stiffens before looking up and staring straight through Darrel. Spooky, he thinks.
âI donât hate him, I promise.â
I know you donât.
âI love him a lot, but itâs like he purposely grates my nerves. He knows Iâm stretched thin and itâs like heâs trying to see how long until I snap. And thatâs not fair! I donât know how to be a parent, I donât how to raise a fourteen year old!â
Darrel isnât sure when it happened, but a flip was switched as Junior started to rant angrily. He doesnât leave the cemetery too often, but when he did he noticed the two often riled each other up; it was never one sided. He canât exactly correct Darry though so he hums instead.
âDaddy, you know when you first, um,â he winces. âleft, Pony didnât talk for a week. Okay, thatâs fine, I can handle that, but he stopped eating too. I tell him, âPony you have to eat something, you can only go so long without eating before you die from starvation.â And I kid you not the only thing he says to me that entire week was âYouâre not dad, Darrel, you canât tell me what to doâ. I never said I was! I just didnât want him to die too, is that so bad?â
Darrel blinks. That was a lot, and heâs not really sure where to start processing it. He sighs airlessly, Itâs not bad. You were worried about him and had his best interests at heart I get it. Is he eating now at least?
Just as fast as it came, the anger seems to leave Darry all once as he lies back on the grass with his hands over his face. âI donât even know if he eating for real, yet. Iâm not home enough to know; I eat my breakfast in the dark, go to work, come home when everyoneâs asleep, eat dinner in the dark, go to bed, rinse and repeat.â
Darrel winces. Even he didnât work those kind of hours and couldâve handled them. Darrel liked his solitude every now and then, but not Darry. No, not his Junior; his Junior is a peopleâs person through and through, thereâs a reason he won boy of his year.
Rubbing Darryâs ankle he says, I know youâre working your ass off, but Iâm real proud of you, baby. I know it donât look it now, but it will all pay off.
Thereâs a pause, and if he wants he could trick himself into believing his boy heard him, before Darry says something so quietly Darrel has to strain to hear. âI know itâs wrong, and I try not to, but sometimes I wish I let them get taken. I love them, really I do! But Soda wants to drop out of school and Pony hates me and he thinks I hate him back, and donât even get me started on Dallasâ I donât think thereâs a been a weekend where we havenât havenât argued or he hasnât been in jail. Iâm trying my best, but I keep screwing up and thatâs not fair on them.â
He breaks into sobs again, this time so strong his whole body shakes. Darrel canât even do anything to comfort him, his stupid ghost body isnât corporeal. The best thing he can do is stroke Darryâs hair and hope he knows his daddy is here for him. He hates seeing his kids cry and heâs never been more angry that heâs dead.
Between sobs Darry says, âI wanna leave. So I canât mess anything else up.â
No, sir. Youâll get the hang of things soon enough, itâs a new adjustment and yâallâve just gotta find your footing. I know itâs hard, but yâall will find it.
âIâm not gonna,â Darry protests. His baby is red in the face and breathing real hard, but Darrel is thankful is eyes are finally starting to dry. âI want to leave but I donât want to leave them.â
So, what are you gonna do, Junior?
âI donât know,â he answers. âI wish you were here, youâd know what to do.â
Darrel winces. Actually now-
âWell, never mind. You wouldnât be dumb enough to get in this situation to begin with.â
Harsh, but heâs probably right. Darrel watches as the gears turn in Juniorâs head. He loves all his kids equally, yes. But Darryâs always been his favorite to watch because when he isnât focused he wears every emotion on his face. He can see exactly when Darrys made his mind up long before he stands up and dusts off his pants.
âYou drive a hard bargain, but fine Iâll stay.â Darrel barks out a laugh as Darry checks his watch. Itâs 6:29pm, heâs been here for nearly three hours. âShit, I said Iâd make dinner.â Somehow, when Darry looks up heâs staring Darrel in the eyes. âIâve gotta run, but Iâll see you later.â
Alright, stay tough out there. I love you, kiddo.
Darryâs eyes widen a minuscule amount and he grins as he ducks his head. âYeah, I love you too, daddy.â
#should probably post at a more reasonable hour#but we up#itâs 3am iâm not proofreading#i thought writing darrel sr would be a lot easier#dear god was i wrong#the outsiders#darry curtis#darrel curtis sr#soda and the other are mentioned#but they arenât real big yk#idk how long this is but itâll be on ao3 tmr#iâm going to bed now#outsiders musical#the outsiders fanfiction
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I'm going to try one more time because I'm I dunno a glutton for punishment or something. I don't have a lot of hope, though. My impression is that most folks aren't actually reading everything I have to say and are, at best, skimming. Which, to be fair, is par for the course on this site. For this reason there's a tl;dr at the end you can jump to if you're so inclined. The rest of this post is pretty long in order to explain, but if you don't really care about the explanation and just want to be horrified, go for it.
I'm fifty nine years old. I have been married for thirty six years. Prior to that marriage, I had been with a lot of different people in the 8 years between when I became sexually active and I got my spouse. So I am not inexperienced in either sexual encounters, problems relating to sexual relations, relationships (both long and short term), nor differences in hygiene habits.
In response to your incredulity over people's learned behaviors fading over time:
Habits of childhood can be difficult to unlearn. It's possible to make an effort to change a habit, but then for other things to come up that distract and the change gets forgotten in favor of the muscle memory from childhood. There are many things that I've learned over time that are better ways to do a thing, but sometimes still forget that I've learned a better way and resort to how I originally did the thing. There are many reasons why this might happen such as distractions or having too many things to think about so my body operates on autopilot for some things. If this continues for a while, one typically loses the new habit and has to relearn the new way of doing things. Though it does tend to come back faster than the initial attempt did, it's still a conscious effort that has to be made.
Back to the main point. The assumption I'm attempting to address here is the one where everyone learns all the same basic hygiene lessons and that no one could ever have any reason for not having learned to make sure to wash their privates all the way down to and including the perineum and anal area. This assumption carries a whole lot weight. Here's a partial list of things being assumed:
That they have a parent or family member who has taught them how to clean themselves well.
That the family had water that was safe to wash thoroughly in most of the time.
That the family had the money to pay for the water bills and didn't deliberately avoid certain washing rituals because of the cost of water.
That they had present family members at all.
That they weren't living unhoused for part or most of their childhood, making washing (and especially washing the private parts) less common or safe to do because showers and such weren't always available and washing on the street could get one arrested.
This is a list of situations I can think of off the top of my head that might mean a person wasn't really taught how to clean themselves properly or that might have prevented them developing the habit. It is hardly exhaustive.
Because I recognize that people have very different lived experiences than I have had, when I'm faced with a situation like has been mentioned in this thread, I'd be more likely to just ask some questions or try to have a conversation about it. As I said before, assuming that the relationship was otherwise a good one. No one is perfect and if I threw out an entire, very good, loving, and supportive relationship because of discovering a situation in my spouse's upbringing that was weird and a little gross to me, I wouldn't still be with my spouse. If, after talking with them, it turns out that they're just a lazy, dirty person who won't even try learning a new way to exist in order to not make their partner sick, that's a completely different situation.
Now that being said, I've broken up with a guy because of how he chewed (I could not stand it, his whole family chewed like that. Even the slightest possibility of having to spend my life around those people gave me the screaming willies. Still, I did mention it to him and he was unwilling to adjust how he chewed for me. So that was it). I've broken up with guys because I couldn't stand how they smelled even after showering.
I'm not saying it's not a break up worthy offense to not keep one's privates clean for one's partner. I'd probably be far less inclined to talk to him if he were an occasional partner, not a "boyfriend" but "boyfriend" suggests a certain degree of emotional entanglement that usually means one has put some effort into the relationship. It just seems extreme to not even talk to the boyfriend about the issue to see how they respond and instead to just dump them, but maybe that can be chalked it up to my extreme old age.
tl;dr Not everyone learns exactly the same lessons about washing their privates. Basic hygiene is a skill that has to be taught, it is not instinctive. Not everyone grew up with the same resources, family, water, time, as everyone else. The term "boyfriend" seems more involved than "fuck buddy" and so taking the time to talk to the boyfriend about something that's bothersome doesn't seem like an unreasonable course of action.
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what do you think Jack's flaws are? I believe that one of them is that he tends to idealize people like Leona he doesn't see the unpleasant sides of people.
Real quick, wanted to thank @/tinyfantasminha for taking the time to share their thoughts with me + give me some ideas on where to look for supplemental Jack lore ^^
I won't be going out of my way to make a list of all his flaws due to the reasons cited in this post. However, I'm going to discuss the idea posed by this anon. I don't know if I'd phrase it as "[Jack] doesn't see the unpleasant sides of people". I actually think the contrary: Jack is often suspicious and unwilling to trust others. This is particularly true for Octavinelle (see: book 3, Jack Labwear vignettes, etc.), but also extends to the general student populace, as he prefers to work alone. Jack does have more leniency towards his Savanaclaw senpais, Ruggie and especially Leona, but they're exceptions and not the rule. I think Jack would ideally like to have honorable senpai to look up to, but ideals are very different than what life handed him. Additionally, I don't think Jack has a habit of idealizing (like Kalim or Silver, who are oblivious to red flags and/or choose to think the best of their peers) or idolizing others (like Sebek does Malleus), at least not to the same extremes as some of his classmates do.
Back to Jackâs feelings about his Savanaclaw senpai for a moment. He first saw Leona on TV before ever meeting the guy, so itâs very possible that Jack formed a parasocial attachment to him and projected his own just ideals onto this stranger. Thatâs not uncommon or unexpected behavior for a preteen or teenager, whoâs still trying to get a sense for their own identity and their place in the world. When he actually meets Leona, Jack is then taken aback by reality being totally different than his expectations.
Though Jack claims to operate as a lone wolf, he respects and adheres to pact hierarchy very strictly. In his own dorm uniform vignettes, he expresses that he believes Ruggie is Savanaclawâs second-in-command and goes out of his way to try and earn Ruggieâs trust. Even when Ruggie says itâs annoying or acts suspicious of his junior, Jack persists like a wolf on the hunt. And thatâs the thing about Jack: he is stubborn, and that can lead to problems, especially if others are involved. In his attempts to help out Ruggie, heâs being overbearing. By trying to do everything on his own, heâs potentially shouldering more work and shutting his peers out. Thatâs part of Jackâs brand of NRC prideâall the students have it to some degree.
Jackâs real fatal flaw is that heâs too judgmental. I already mentioned earlier how he tends to be very suspicious of others, but Jack also has a tendency to see things âas they areâ and is inflexible with his thinking. Like⌠very face value. He sees Leona ordering Savanaclaw mobs to injure other students? Automatically goes, âthatâs wrong!!â based on his own moral compass, doesnât ask himself âwhy might they be doing this?â. He also assumes Leona is acting out of cowardice or just isnât âtrying hard enoughâ. This is a behavior Jack exhibits in other situations too. For example, he laughs when Leona talks about the honorable lessons heâs supposed to grant to the Sunset Warriors (implying he doesnât see Leona as honorable). He calls Vil an âold manâ when everyone returns from S.T.Y.X. He expresses surprise when people he thought were twigs at a glance (Silver, Azul, etc.) are actually muscular or are at least making efforts to bulk up. This all makes Jack come off as blunt or, at worst (unintentionally) callous or insensitive.
I know this is technically a post about Jackâs flaws, but I think itâs pretty admirable that he consistently apologizes when heâs wrong and tries to learn or to make up for it. He willing worked in the Mostro Lounge to replace Jadeâs wood ear mushroom that he accidentally disposed of (Labwear vignettes). He realizes townsfolk find him physically intimidating so he tries to take customer service training to be friendlier (Port Wear vignettes). He tries to protect child!Vil but learns that Vil can protect himself. There are countless other examplesâand for a first year, he is remarkably mature in genuinely owning up to his mistakes and striving to be better next time.
I guess Iâll leave you with that ^^ just so we can end this post positively!
#disney twst#disney twisted wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#Jack Howl#Leona Kingscholar#Ruggie Bucchi#Savanaclaw#notes from the writing raven#question#book 7 part 11 spoilers#book 7 spoilers#jack dorm uniform vignette spoilers#tamashina mina spoilers#jack port wear vignette spoilers#book 5 spoilers#Vil Schoenheit#Kalim Al-Asim#Silver#Sebek Zigvolt#Malleus Draconia#book 3 spoilers#Jack labwear vignette spoilers#Octavinelle#book 2 spoilers#Azul Ashengrotto#book 6 spoilers
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Hey! Could you maybe write something for Lia Wälti where r has a reputation as a fuckboy/womanizer since they have quite a few one-night stands that never lead to anything more. They always get teased by the team for that. R and Lia are close friends and always very close physically: cuddling on the couch, sleeping in the same bed during sleepovers, Lia sitting on r's lap etc. One night they are watching a movie or smth on the couch and Lia straight up asks r why they have never tried anything with her. R tells her it is because they don't want her to leave, and then explains that basically all anyone ever wanted from them was sex, and no one stuck around after they had that, that's why now r just sticks to casual hook-ups if anyone approches them, and never actually initiates that stuff first. And they don't care about some stranger leaving in the morning, but they do like Lia a lot, and her leaving would really hurt, so they never acted on their feelings. And then a fluffy confession from Lia's side? Sorry this is really long, you absolutly don't have to do it if you're not comfortable with it!
Warnings: swearing, short, suggestive, mentions of sex (brief) mentions of fuck-boy, mentions of one night stands, kissing, making out.
Lia Wälti x Reader
Youâre Different, and I donât know why.
MasterList
Relationshipâs arenât your thing. You think they are underrated, love is underrated. You were taught that way while growing up. Sure, maybe the reason why is because you never knew your dad since he left the minute your mum got pregnant - ever since then your mother had taught you to never fall in love. So you took that advise. Never been in a relationship before, but definitely slept with half the girls in your hometown.
You always did a really good job with trying to not let those one night stands get in the way of football. Ending things with the girl as soon as the sunrise starts to shine awake. Cutting off any excess to phone number, instagram, ext.
Two years ago, you left your hometown. With getting a bigger contact with a new team who has been pushing for you for some time now - Arsenal. You decided to step up your game. Even win more trophies. Leaving was easy. You had no relationship with any family member, then not fearing enough to even say goodbye either.
But, ever since joining Arsenal things have been different. Different as in, not that many one night stand - and thatâs because of a girl. A girl. Breaking a promise to your mother, you seem to be drawn into this woman. You so badly wanted to push her away, but you canât seem to have the courage to. Which was weird. You always had courage to do anything. You never felt any sort of guilt of even thinking of doing anything like that.
She was driving you crazing.
Right now, itâs after training. Everyone is all gathered in the changing rooms. Getting into their own clothes they walked in this morning. You sitting down in the bench, tying your lases on your trainers.
Kyra, with the same old smirk on her face, sits down next to you, nudging your shoulder. âY/l/n, you been with cute ladies lately?â
You roll your eyes, now knowing everyone is now focused on you. âNo.â
Kyra raises an eyebrow, looking around the room before speaking. âReally? Cause if I remember what miss McCabe said to me the other day was - on your first day with the team you tried to get with everyone.â
You look up, immediately making eye contact with Katie who immediately moves behind her girlfriend. âI didnât say tha-â
You roll my eyes again, before shrugging my shoulders. âOkay, sure but I didnât try to get with them. Just flirted before I didnât anymore.â
âThatâs true, she hasnât flirted with us ever since then.â Leah confirms, nodding her head.
âWhy did you stop?â Kyra asks. Your eyes shifted to Lia, who was looking at you, smiling softly knowing the answer. âNo reason.â
You then stand up from the bench. âNow, if you excuse me, Iâm going home. Why donât you nag to Alessia to who she kissed at last nights party.â
âWhat?!â - âFor fuck sake, Y/n/n!â
With all the attention to Alessia. You look for Lia who is still looking at me. You nod my head for her to follow me. She easily sneaks past everyone who is still pestering Alessia.
As soon as you walk out the door; when you see Lia, you quickly grab her arm pulling her into a storage room. She lets out a yelp as you push her in. You quickly shut the door, locking it.
You turn around to see Lia smiling widely at you. Her hands on her hips. âSeriously? This is so high-school relationship material. Sneaking into the storage room?â
You shrug, smiling at her. âCanât help myself. Havenât kissed you for hours.â You mumble, taking only a small step forward to wrap your hands around her waist.
âIs that so?â Lia whispered, immediately wrapping her arms around your neck. âWell, we should do something about that, hey?â
You nod your head, pulling her closer to kiss her. The kiss was soft. Very different to other kisses you had with other girls.
You smile into the kiss - again, different to other girls that you never smiled while kissing before.
Lia change your life straight away.
First day at Arsenal. Kyra was right. You flirted with everyone - but as soon as your eyes founded Liaâs body you stopped. All your attention was on her and her only.
Lia pull away from the kiss. âLet me ask you something.â She says, looking up at you. - You nod your head, hands rubbing against her hips.
âWhy havenât you tried anything with me?â
You burrow your eyebrows, looking at her. âWhat you mean?â
âLike you were at your hometown. You choked up with every girl you found hot - and obviously you found me hot but, you didnât try anything. You didnât even flirt with me like you did with the others.â Lia rambled, her eyes staying in yours the whole time.
âDunno. Youâre different, and I donât know why. I definitely thought about it but then hated myself. I could never do that to you.â You answered honestly.
âBut, Iâm not. I promise.â You state, holding her hands. Lia smiles, rubbing her thumb along your hand. âI know. I can tell how much you care about me. Just wanted to know.â
Lia then pulls you back into a kiss. You instantly kiss back, again smiling. âLetâs go home⌠I got something planned.â Lia mumbles, smirking.
âOh yeah?â You mumble back, pulling away to see her smirk, smirking back. âWhat?â
âItâs a surprise.â Lia whispers, unlocking the door and pulling it open. Once the cost was clear she grabs your hand, pulling you with her to the exit.
You never been more grateful that you left your hometown to London.
#lia wälti#lia walti#lia walti x reader#lia wälti x reader#arsenal women#woso community#woso fanfics#woso x reader#woso imagine#woso one shot#woso#womenâs football
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I've finally realised why I fundamentally disliked the New 52 version of Shazam/Captain Marvel.
I've had nitpicks about it before, but I always chalked it up to my personal preferences, and not anything inherently wrong with the retcon. It just wasn't my thing.
However, I could never shake the feeling that there was some deeper flaw to it than a mere difference in taste. New 52 Billy is a very different character to his older versions, but the core of his backstory (homeless orphan, history of abuse, extreme independence) was arguably retained, just in a new modern rendition. So why did I feel like the new 52 had lost something important?
Then it hit me.
Any version of Billy Batson would, realistically, never let himself have parents again.
Now that is not to say they don't have merit, I can see the vision with them. A perfectly normal, loving, and safe parental unit to contrast the insanity of Billy's life and give him that sweet hurt/comfort goodness. In the end, though, I could never get used to them. Even with all of Billy's changes in the new 52, it always felt deeply ooc whenever he would respect their authority or consider their comfort more important than his responsibilities. In fact, the new 52 version of him is even more distrusting of adults than the golden/silver age version, so Billy compromising his independent personality (especially after he gets his powers) feels like a huge contradiction to both his original and retconned selves. The Vasquez's aren't developed enough characters to make such a huge narrative trade off satisfying. This weird "distrusts authority figures + is proficiently independent yet let's them dictate his responsibilities and make choices on his behalf" characterisation extends beyond the Vasquez's and into Billy's professional relationships with the League. I love reading things where the trinity try and parent Billy, but the fun of it is how he never let's them in the end. Billy's been treated like an equal long enough for him to have seen his colleagues true selves, there is no chance in hell he'd let Superman dad lecture him when he's seen the man at his worst before.
While I never enjoyed the new 52 "Shazamily" brand, I could tolerate it. I never found any of Billy's siblings aside from Mary and Freddy compelling for various reasons, but Darla, Pedro, and Eugene were alright as far as superfluous characters went. What I really never liked were the Vasquez parents, Rosa, and Victor.
What I love about Billy Batson as a character is how inherently tragic he is, but in more subtle ways. Billy was orphaned/abandoned which is sad in and of itself, but the real meat and potatoes is what came after. Billy's been failed by everyone in life, but will not give up faith in people irregardless. He is the world's most competent 12 year old, with wisdom beyond his years and hard won skills that helped him survive on his own. All of this is what made him worthy of the lightning, what made him different and less likely to misuse such power.
Billy Batson in any era of DC always starts out as one of the weakest members of society. His misfortune always stems from the selfishness of others, who's proclivity to abuse their privileges make the boy intimately acquainted with the worst mankind has to offer. He has been robbed at every turn of good choices, and left with the hard ones instead. Education or food? Entertainment or work? How far is he willing to go for survival? If he lies, cheats and steals will he still want to survive by the end? if it means losing who he wishes to be?
If I were in his circumstances, I would be insulted by any attempts to parent me. Acknowledging that I deserved better wouldn't negate a childhoods worth of untrustworthy adults. By that point I'd be so used to living on my own that any well-meaning adults attempt to "lessen my burden" would certainly chafe. God forbid anybody try discipline me in the hopes of providing structure. I would never respect them again. Put the fucking mantle of Champion of Magic on all that, with an ancient wizards seal of approval, and I'd be out of any foster home faster than you could blink.
Why the hell does Billy stay in a house with a bedtime, and lectures, and restrictions on his ability to choose if he can transform into an invulnerable demi-god who can teleport into a safe, warm pocket dimension? Why doesn't he sell off some old junk from the rock, impersonate an adult, get a cheap apartment and load it up with magic wards and runes and just live there? This kid is divinely sanctioned as worthy of responsibility, why the fuck would he listen to life advice from two adults he barely knows? Billy can still be humble about his power while also having a spine about it.
Billy can have as many siblings as he wants, even if I don't find them all that interesting, but I don't think he would ever want parents again. Not if it meant losing the security that comes with full self-determination. He deserves to have had parents, but the tragedy of Billy Batson is that he can't. He has power unimaginable, is a beloved public figure and successful superhero, all these things that only existed in dreams before, but he doesn't have parents, arguably the one thing universally all children should get to have.
#dc comics#dc#captain marvel#shazam#billy batson#mary bromfield#freddy freeman#superman#batman#wonder woman#shazamily#new 52
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I'll issue a small correction: characters and relationships are *always* supposed to be canonized as long as they don't include an inanimate object or a nebulous group. Only then rule of three potentially comes into play, which is why Kenta (the New Japan wrestler) has a canonical tag for his crutches. This means if you get two of your friends to also write about Kenny Omega's eyebrows or something then you will probably get it to canonical status. Rule of three is used mostly for freeforms, which is why there's not very many wrestling specific freeforms.
Some more details: the awkward thing about choosing what goes into the character canonical is that we have to take into account what fics already exist and what is most likely to exist in the future. We have to balance the desires of all the current users. If a wrestling promotion never got tape or no one on Tumblr or Ao3 fandom has ever shown interest in it, we're probably not going to include a wrestler's name from that promotion. It might seem like we're arbitrarily including something unpopular, but fics get deleted very often, much more often than you think, and dead tags get left behind.
When we changed Swerve's tag after he joined AEW, he still had NXT fics under his name there. There used to be maybe one hundred Dragon Gate fics and they were all purged, leaving lots of characters with old names to deal with when fic started up again. The order of the names is totally arbitrary, we just usually put the newest name first, or the name that won't mess with the alphabetization as much.
As Dana implied, in 99% of fandoms character tags don't get changed pretty much ever, and they don't have to deal with fiction vs reality. There are some fandoms that regularly get requests to change them, even, and have decided not to do so. We have no RPF category and probably never will, because too many people write RPF using fictional wrestler names. (This is okay! Dustin/Greg/Trent/Chuck is a lot of fun.)
You might want us to include every possible name that a wrestler goes under, but then what happens is any relationship tag they're in hits the character limit, and we have to delete some of the names in the relationship canonical. We're encouraged to keep the tags as short as possible for this reason.
We are separating wrestlers by distinctive fictional character whenever possible now. For example, Uncle Howdy has been kept separate from Bo Dallas. It's more difficult to retroactively separate popular wrestlers who were in Lucha Underground a long time ago, even though they were almost all absolutely different characters, because of how many fics we're talking about and how intertwined the tags are. Frankly unless there's a desire for this from Lucha Underground fans sending support requests I don't see this happening.
If you're bothered by anything you're absolutely free to send in a support request. We're not going to see it as you being a Karen or anything, it's a routine part of wrangling. The other wrestling wrangler co-signs everything I wrote.
I love the way wrestlers gimmicks get sorted on ao3 bc it ends up being up to the discretion of the first couple ppl who write them what tag ends up being common. Half of wrestlers arent even marked the same guy as their name on the indies but according to ao3 canon the 64 million yr old dinosaur IS the same guy as that one big brother contestant that had an affair on the show
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Hi, I read your post about Joong/Est & Dunk beef and I wanted to give you more information as I felt like you were missing some-- and bc I got to know them just 2 months and followed them on twitter and the things have been really insane? wild? and I just need to share.
So after Joong posted the tweet about him & Dunk not being on good terms right now, New(!) posted a reply to it "Is this okay?" (I assume he means is it okay to post such a thing?"). And after that Joong's tweet, I saw many fans who were unaware things have been weird btn JD finding out the two weren't getting along well. I'm not against actors sharing their feelings, but it really felt like a bad PR to me that hurts their branding. I was honestly wondering why GMMTV does not give their artists PR training when Joong suddenly posted a selfie of him & Dunk smiling with moustache filter and Dunk also posted a pic with him & Joong & P'tha who is CEO of GMMTV. AND Joong also deleted his tweet about the beef.
Now my unconfirmed theory is that after Joong posted that tweet, things got a bit out of hand and reached the ears of P'Tha and he made them sort of make up or at least ordered them to act more like usual, and for Joong to delete the tweet. In the event they had the next day, they were doing some fanservice too. It was very jarring to see the whole thing unfold tbh, especially Joong's emotional subtweets and retweets of shady quotes that lasted for weeks made me a little worried if he is mentally okay. I'm not sure JD are even on good terms right now (I don't think they are) - I don't know about Joong but Dunk seems to be trying to reach out like wishing him safe flight... but I sure do hope they can keep their working friendship or recover from whatever they are going through right now bc it would be really sad to see it end.
For Est/Joong, there seems to no visible movement for that side as far as I know except for both of their fans fighting each other like twice a week. They got into fight again today bc Joong doesn't even acknowledge or promote ThamePo even though he guest starred in it. The fan communities have been so toxic and weird and I just honestly feel so bad for the actors.
Anon, I turned off reblogs to this post except for the people mentioned within it because I just learned I could (look at this old dog learning new tricks!) and I hope this encourages you to come back to my inbox, anonymously, and offer more discussion without it getting muddled with others' thoughts.
Because I have a question.
But first I want to solidify one key point - I am invested in whatever happened between Joong and Est and, by extension, Joong and everyone else including Dunk. I just want to make that clear, so you don't think I'm trying to claim some level of emotional superiority with my following question because I'm not. I'm interested in everything you wrote because I'm nosy for no good reason, so I want to know what happened and all the details simply because I want to, and I want to make that clear before I continue.
Now, my question:
Why do you perceive Joong's behavior for the past few months as mentally unstable?
It was very jarring to see the whole thing unfold tbh, especially Joong's emotional subtweets and retweets of shady quotes that lasted for weeks made me a little worried if he is mentally okay.
You are not the first to write this. I have seen this sentiment in various spaces raised here with @waitmyturtles and @simysaru43, and on Reddit, so based on your comment, why do you think his behavior equates to him not being mentally okay? Regardless if he is or isn't, I want to know why YOU think that? And please know that I am genuinely asking anyone who has expressed this thought because I truly want to know others' perspective since I think his behavior is a suitable response to what is happening, whatever it might be (which, once again, I want to know what *that* is because I am soooo very nosy).
Joong is no longer friends (friendly?) with Est, yet they work at the same company; therefore, they must be around each other in a professional capacity. He doesn't seem to be friends (friendly?) with Daou anymore either. Yet Dunk, his work partner, hung out with them outside of work, so why can't he be bothered by that? People have stated it seems immature that he would dictate someone else's behavior, but I think we are underestimating the demands of their jobs and the unstated obligations they must abide by within their working relationships. Joong is an actor in a genre that is known for its (toxic) fans, so I am also surprised that GMMTV doesn't have a stronger grasp on any of its actors' social media presences, but Joong is also human, so having emotions, even public ones, is part of that.
So is the worrisome part of his posts that they focus on his emotions? Does it worry you that his posts are rooted in him publicly revealing his feelings? I'm not in the practice of defending men or their behavior, but I don't like the implication that a man feeling is cause for concern. That's why I'm asking why you are worried about him because I don't want to assume this is where you are coming from. I'm not asking for you to defend yourself or your comments because this is not a battle. I'm kindly asking for your perspective because my background (Mexican, Black, American) tells me this is messy behavior from a man, but my ideologies (feminist, anarchist, lover) tell me to be proud that he is allowing himself to display his feelings on a public forum.
But I might be missing something, culturally, generationally, or a third item I haven't thought about. Which is why I'm asking why his behavior is unsettling to you? I truly hope you respond, and if you want, I won't share your response.
Either way, let's discuss this further.
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Hi saintsenara, Iâd like to know your thoughts on the Trace etc because you always seem to have a a really lucid and informed perspective of, well, everything
I never liked how the Ministry and Hogwarts are able to automatically and infallibly detect muggleborns. I feel like the ramifications of that arenât properly dealt with but I also think that itâd be more interesting and plausible if muggleborns had to be looked for.
I also feel like the Trace is dealt with very strangely. When is that integrated? Is it just automatic for muggleborn students or would the schoolâs representative (ie. Dumbledore for Tom and McGonagall for Hermione ) place it? If they can place these restrictions on children remotely then why couldnât they for, say, Death Eaters or Sirius Black? It doesnât make sense to me that there is anything about the Trace that would make it only applicable to underage wizards and witches. If they need to do something to the children to place the Trace then why canât they do that with all Azkaban inmates as a preventative measure? Is it simply too outrageous to do that to adult wizards? Is the Trace too easily broken? If the Trace is easily breakable then the Order wouldâve broken it for Harry in Deathly Hallows, wouldnât they?
The lack of thought enrages me!
the thing which has to be borne in mind with the trace is that its narrative purpose is primarily as a coming-of-age experience - it's the threshold which wizarding teenagers need to cross to become legal adults.
and not only this, it's primarily an allusion to the real life coming-of-age experience which defines [or, certainly, which defined in the 2000s, gen z are famously more abstemious] british and irish teenage life...
becoming old enough to legally drink.
when i was a teenager, eighteenth birthdays were a big deal precisely because of the opportunities they afforded to get legally boozed. i was in the supermarket at 10am on mine, passport in hand, buying a disgusting bottle of own brand vodka [which i don't think i or any of my friends ever touched] just because i could.
but the word "legally" is important in this context. because, while the legal drinking age in the uk and ireland is eighteen... that doesn't mean that most teenagers wait until then for their first sip. and nobody - adults in positions of authority such as police, teachers, social workers, doctors etc. included - thinks they do.
and that's because the law is actually more ambiguous than it seems. in the uk, it's legal for children as young as five to drink alcohol in a private residence [!]. in england, scotland, and wales [but not northern ireland], sixteen year olds can legally drink some types of alcohol in licensed premises as long as they're eating a meal.
as a result, the legal penalties for underage drinking are basically non-existent [for the drinker, that is; they can be reasonably hefty for anyone caught selling to under 18s]... if there's nothing else in play which might attract the state's attention.
or: i went to a house party at a friend's when i was fifteen, drank a bottle of rose, broke up with my boyfriend, and ended up sobbing in her garden at the top of my lungs about how men are dogs at 2am, and was then sick.
this friend and i were both white, grammar-school-educated, generally-perceived-as-sensible teenage girls, whose families were well-known and well-liked. the neighbours, seeing me having an absolute flop of a night, could say "ah, the folly of youth, we were all young once, the lasses are in high spirits etc. etc."
but without the protection afforded by social acceptability, maybe they'd have interpreted the situation very differently, and called the police or contacted social services about my friend's mam letting us drink there, or so on.
the trace functions in the same way. the actual law on underage magic - that it's totally illegal - is obviously nonsense. we know in canon that children in wizarding households can use magic before they're seventeen, because - as dumbledore says - the ministry is happy to trust their parents to regulate them doing so.
that is, in families which have the standing afforded by conformity to social convention [especially in living separately from muggles], underage magic can be seen as all a bit of a laugh.
but muggleborns are viewed in the eyes of the state as risks, until they reach adulthood and - in all the cases we meet in canon - remove themselves from the world of their birth entirely. the ministry's main aim - the thing it's preoccupied with - is preventing muggles from learning that magic exists. therefore, anyone magical who lives in a muggle household is subject to much more surveillance than those who don't.
[if the weasley twins do magic in the burrow's garden, who cares? if harry does it in the middle of little whinging, countless muggles might see!]
when it comes to how muggleborns are detected, i actually quite like the extra-canonical information jkr has given about the quill of acceptance and the book of admittance [which is on pottermore]. where i don't agree with it is that i don't think all muggleborns are admitted to hogwarts.
i've said a few times - and, for my askbox girlies, i will write the longer meta on this, i promise - that i think hogwarts applies some form of selection process, which explains why the class-status of the intake [including the muggleborn students we meet in canon] is near-uniform.
as a result, i think that muggleborn students are looked for - they're observed and vetted to make sure they'll fit in at hogwarts - and the interview they have with the deputy head is the final stage in that process.
when they're accepted to hogwarts [or when they actually start at the school, to give hermione the summer of trying spells she mentions in philosopher's stone] i think it's fair to imagine that the trace comes into effect, but that it's only ever going to cause alarm at the ministry if it's broken when students - of any background - are in muggle areas.
which means very little for wizard-raised students - who can do magic at home whenever they want - but restricts the freedom of muggleborn ones.
when it comes to restricting adult magic... we know - because sirius mentions it in prisoner of azkaban - that inmates are deprived of their wands. jkr has retconned how possible magic is without a wand in her post-series writing, but the evidence of canon is that all but the most basic, unsophisticated magic is impossible without one.
losing access to a wand - and, therefore, losing access to magic - is how the state restricts adults' use of magic [which is what happens to hagrid when he acquires his criminal record for manslaughter]. and this is actually a more strictly enforceable and much harsher punishment - it's basically the permanent deprivation of the wizarding world's fundamental marker of liberty - than the trace, which, while it is enshrined in law, basically amounts to nothing more than a fairly loosely-enforced social barrier between childhood and adulthood for 90% of the population.
#asks answered#asenora meta#surprise! it's the class system!#although slightly more obliquely this time
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Traveling & Love (Pluto astrocartography observations)âď¸đŠđ˝ââ¤ď¸âđ¨đž
Traveling is in my opinion one of the best ways to meet new lovers, friends or find connections you otherwise may not come across. Here are a few of the experiences I have had when traveling and how love played a role.
Pluto on the Descendant (DS): The Power of Transformational Relationships
I traveled to San Juan, PR for my 28th birthday, the early start of my Saturn year. It came a week or so after leaving my highschool sweetheart. and was probably one of the best vacations I have ever taken for reasons I will share in this post. So this time as very transformational for me, my whole life was changing and I was feeling a sense of freedom and rebirth while in PR. I kept joking with my homegirls about how I was going to meet my Puerto Rican papi while I was there so keep that in my mind. First let me explain how this Pluto DS line played a part in the events that happened.
The Descendant in astrocartography represents partnerships, relationships, and how you connect with others on a one-to-one level. When Pluto is prominent on this line, the relationships you form in this area are intense, transformative, and potentially life-changing.
Transformational Love đ
So while in PR I end up meeting somebody whose love has been what you guys see me describing in most of the posts. We met on the water where I was completely caught off guard in the best way. Being with him feels like a transformational love in so many ways. Meeting my love near my Pluto/DS line feels like a deep, magnetic connection that is fated or karmic. He has definitely have awakened a side of me that I hadn't accessed before. This is important bc again, I met him right after freeing myself from a toxic cycle of love I was so afraid to leave. And there he was. The connection with him challenges me to confront deeper truths about myself, my desires, and my capacity for vulnerability and intimacy.
Healing and Rebirthâ¨
Pluto governs transformation, endings, and new beginnings. Traveling to San Juan after ending a 15-year partnership symbolized a personal rebirth for me. This place was a catalyst for me to shed old patterns and step into a new chapter of my life.The love I found there to me is a reflection of this rebirthâa relationship that feels profound and meaningful, and one that has helped me to heal & redefine what partnership means to me.
Intensity and Depth đ§Ą
Relationships under the Pluto/DS influence are rarely surface-level. The way I feel like I have known him before.Like everything I manifested in a partner came directly to me in the person I needed at the right time. I was so serious when I said I was looking for my husband, and the more I spoke that the more real this became for me.its a connection that feels intense, all-consuming, or like itâs touching parts of my soul I didnât know were there.The emotional depth and passion he brings feels like the opposite of what I experienced in my previous partnership, creating a stark contrast. a breath of fresh new air is what I look at it as.
Emotional Rebirth:Â San Juan, near my Pluto line, served as a backdrop for a symbolic death (the end of my past relationship) and a rebirth (my new connection). Itâs as though this place holds the energy I needed to step into a new version of myself..
It gets better. I learned that he lives in Houston, Texas. another city I've traveled to where I have had some of the best times of my life. I saw Beyonce there and met some of the most genuine people. The way I felt like again,I belong here was so real. I could see myself living there and being a more vibrant person each time I went. So when he said he was fom Houston I immediately am like. hmm.
So I check to see what line Is have going through Houston.... yall. why is it my Venus & Mars IC line go directly through it. I have them conjunct natally. So let me break that down in a separate post. But just knowww, I think I was meant to meet this man. By the way for context he's a Capricorn sun, and Im a virgo sun.
Where is your Pluto line in your astrocartography chart? Have you ever traveled anywhere you felt called to go and something out of the world happened to you?
-@nianeyemystic
#astrology signs#astrology#astro notes#astro observations#synastry aspects#astrology aspects#love astrology#lovers astrology#astrocartography#pluto line#astrology readings#astro community#pluto synastry#mars pluto#venus mars
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