#i have so many silly hcs abt them

[sodafrog13]

the more ppl i can rope into my identical twins swans/trans alex agenda the better

[bi-scottsummers]

Hi, hello, just came here to say that I love your fic "trending in Japan". I was wondering if you had headcanons regarding Kenji or Emi or interpersonal relationships and stuff. Many hugs for you.

hi hello, thank you for the encouragement and hugs! After some thought ive realized I do in fact have some hcs about some of the character dynamics in the movie as well as just kenji himself, cause hes captivated my entire brain:

Kenji & Emi

Emi does not have teeth but she does inexplicably have a teething phase. kenji is forced to hide all his (salvaged) fancy cars in the garage bc the corvette's already been chewed to hell and his heart is gonna give out if he has to watch any more classics get wrecked

he reads her bedtime stories. A lot of aesop's fables, because theyre short and fun and hes trying to raise his monster daughter with good morals. emi goes hogwild for these but its unclear if she actually understands what hes saying; kenji's pretty sure she just likes the silly voices he uses for different characters

they go flying together! they go first thing in the morning before breakfast - it helps kenji shake off the grogginess of sleep and emi gets to stretch her wings. shes not able to go very far for very long initially, but as she grows and gets those cardio gainz she almost gets to be quicker than him. they have races and play air tag :)

while she doesnt have the vocal range to speak english herself, it becomes clear that emi does understand it well. (kenji also develops an ear for her chirping/squawks, though body language & facial expressions play a big part in communication for both of them) during her (much later) rebellious phase she'll simply pretend not to know what's being said when kenji is telling her to do something she doesn't wanna do, which frustrates him to no end

Kenji

developed a pretty massive chip on his shoulder after moving to the states. it wasn't just bitterness over his dad staying behind, though that was a part of it. this is canon but he was picked on in school for "how [he talked], how [he looked] and what [he ate]." he felt like he had something to prove to both his father and the world. he threw himself into sports - specifically baseball - and his academics, and he did so well that it forced everyone to shut up about how he was different from them and focus on how he was better than them

^ playing off this: kenji had a bonkers fucking yonkers routine when he was a kid/in highschool. he'd get up hours before school started to practice his swing, go for a ~1hr run, workout, study, etc. He'd go to school, come home, and do it all again. this is exaggerated but my point is that this kid was DETERMINED and had the discipline to see that determination through to the end

didnt have many friends because of all aforementioned things. he had acquaintances, and he was invited to parties and outings and stuff (never went), but he spent most of his free time hanging out with his mom. he never really had a "parents are so embarrassing" phase. he always liked to do anything with his mother: going to the bank, going grocery shopping, watching cheesy telenovelas till ungodly hours in the morning, etc. she was his no.1 supporter, confidant, and best friend

he played for his university's baseball team and got scouted at 19. his mom forced him to finish his bachelor's first so once he graduated with his degree in kinesiology at 21, he was drafted to the dodgers

Kenji & Ami

both of them, up until meeting each other, were totally dedicated to their career (and child) so they had basically 0 time for friends. theyre both borderline losers but theyre juuust good enough at what they do for people to admire them instead of finding them sad and lowkey pathetic

kenji is way more into the idea of being friends than ami is. hes pretty enthusiastic about it; he thinks that they have a kind of rapport, since they share a similar work ethic and are both (unbeknownst to ami) single parents. he calls her to chat abt random things. ami initially isnt superrrr into it; she thinks kenji is kinda lonely and desperate for human connection, & it isnt until her mom points out that she has not spoken to anyone outside of work-related reasons in 10+ years that shes like oh shit, i am also lonely and desperate for human connection. so she grudgingly acquires a friend. theyre both really bad at it

need to clarify that in my mind their dynamic is 95% kenji yapping about work and drama in his personal life (circumventing the 8m baby kaiju hes raising) while ami goes "mhm mhm" and takes notes until kenji notices and is like What are you doing. at which point ami is like...... right . nothing. im listening. and forces herself to put the notepad away. she has a hard time disengaging from the reporter mindset and just hearing something intriguing without turning it into an article. the other 5% are the rare moments where theyre connecting super well - ami's psychoanalyzing the hell out of whatever kenji just said and hes like what are you my therapist. over time she starts opening up to him, too, and eventually theyre comfortable enough to be having philosophical discussions over breakfast just for funsies

before kenji reveals that hes ultraman, ami thinks hes in a gang. he keeps showing up to their lunch "dates" with like bruised eyes and fractured bones and gets all shifty when she tries to ask about what happened. when she eventually confronts him about it, hes so offended that she thinks hed be involved in something like that that he tells her about being ultraman

thats about all i can think of rn, though im sure ill think of more after rotating all the characters in my head for a while. thanks again for stopping in, i appreciate the support :)

[vrmxlho]

hii kira !! do u have any hcs for sae abt how he would be as a bf?

SAE ITOSHI 糸師冴

if sae were a love trope he would 100% be belated love epiphany

"i never realised how much i loved them until they were gone." type beat yk

like pride and prejudice, except he's elizabeth and you're darcy ??

where you confess first and he rejects you but once you're not near him he realises that he really did love you

or when he saw how loaded you were, you be the judge (kidding)

y'all already know i think he's a good cook. like he was in spain for ages you bet he picked a few things up. cuz idk about spanish men but ik most italian men know how to cook and well.

he pours all his love into everything he makes, probably his love language honestly.

but he'd never let you know he's cooking for you because he cares

"you look like a ghost have you been eating properly?" "oh, no. unfortunately, i haven't found much time to cook lately..." "how bothersome. am i gonna have to take you all the way to the hospital when you faint from anemia?" "but i'm not even anemic..." "you will be if you don't eat your spinach." "..." "you know what. since you're so incapable i'll just cook for you." "excuse me??"

forgive him, he's just a bit of a cunt, but he loves you i promise

(also if you didn't know fun fact: preparing a homemade meal for someone is akin to confessing your feelings to them)

he's not much for PDA in fact in public he has his same, stupid, emotionless, deadpan face that is so punchable (affectionately?)

but when you're at home he'll find any excuse to lean his whole bodyweight on you

he also loves leaning in to kiss you and then reaching behind you to grab something or whatever, just to leave you flushed and stressed the fuck out

annoying asshole

he also gets very touchy when tired, if you're sleeping next to each other he tends to end up hugging you close to his heart by the time you wake up

he may not seem it but he would genuinely do anything for you

he tends to ignore most messages/texts/emails unless they're super important but he'd reply to you the second you text him

or even if it's a silly tweet

@you: there are 2 many ppl at this café 😞 @officialsaeitoshi: send me your location i got you your usual @you: ayo, how did you have it prepared n everything 😭 @officialsaeitoshi: spidey senses

he also has the most deadpan, sarcastic humour known to man

he's horrible (just my type)

nothing that comes out of his mouth is to be trusted

beware!!!

he is the no.1 gossiper alive, he knows everything about everyone's business even if he looks like the type of person who'd never think of anyone other than himself

somehow he's both at the same time

he could go hours talking about this random guy in his club who's actually the secret son of a drug lord and who ran away from home to save himself from imminent death...

what???? how does he know this?

i'm pretty sure he doesn't know either, anyway

he loves his lil self care night routines

you both sitting on the sofa talking about life (actually it's just him talking and you listening but whatever)

sae itoshi was an evening person. not because he felt most productive then. and not because he enjoyed the peace and quiet of the city. but because he enjoyed his night routines with you right next to him every second. you'd sit on the sink sill as he gently passed a finger with clay on it over your face as you kept talking about your day. "and then when i went to get coffee there were just so many people at the café it was such a hassle. this guy–" "shush. do you want clay in your mouth?" he kept swiping the remaining clay mask on your now stationary chin. once done he lifted you and walked to the sofa. this was no new routine. this was the only way he was able to unwind. with you next to him, just talking about the little, almost meaningless things. "i read somewhere that your coach is having an affair is that true?" you didn't know why you kept instigating him. it was late and you knew if he began talking now he'd only finish once the sun rose or your wake up alarm rang. but seeing him so animated was a rarity so you had to take advantage anytime you could.

now for how he confessed

at first when you confessed he rejected you and didn't think much of it at all

until he started noticing the little things about you, he started obsessing with every bit of you

how you looked, how you dress, how you style your hair

but also how your under eyes crease when you smile

how you're very picky with your food, especially dessert, but you'd eat anything if someone handmade it for you

how you're so patient when you tutor even if the person is being a dumbfuck

after obsessing over everything you did for about a day or two he was sick of the weird, nauseating feeling in his stomach

it had been about three days since the confession. being rejected right on the spot, especially in that cold manner was painful to say the least. but you were sure you had gotten over it. and you hoped with all your heart that he too had forgotten. he had just stood there as you finished telling him how he made you feel and how you had liked him for a while now. he had a horrible scowl on his face, arms crossed and an uninterested posture. you already knew what the answer was when you were done but it hurt so much more when he finally confirmed it all. so it was surprising when you saw sae march up to you as you ate your lunch with your friends. he had the same horrible scowl on his face from before. and you could feel your stomach drop as he pulled your wrist in a gruff manner. careless. he didn't care for you. "itoshi what are you–" he finally stopped once you were in a quiet corner behind the main building, away from curious eyes. "we need to talk." "about what?" "i couldn't sleep." "ok..?" "i couldn't stop thinking about you." "oh. i'm sorry if my confession made you uncomfortable. i didn't mean for it to bother you so much." "yes. it's so bothersome. now every time i see you with anyone but me, it hurts. i can't stand hearing about anyone but me, from you. i don't want you to think of anyone but me."

and then you were just like 😧🫣😏🤩

if you think rin's dramatic just WAIT until you talk to sae he's insane

THE BIGGEST drama queen (i hate him)

although i do think he is secure about himself and knows you wouldn't ever hurt him

i feel like he does have abandonment issues (a bit)

like imagine going through your teen years without family in a foreign country, you'd feel isolated no matter how many friends you made or how nice your host family was

he tries not giving any external reaction so you barely notice at first but every time he sees you with someone, looking a bit too friendly, he always feels his heart tighten

he's very gentle when kissing you

it's not like he's super strong or anything (mans is tiny)

and it's not that he's scared to hurt you, he just doesn't wanna appear too possessive or anything

favourite places to kiss you: why do i wanna say your waist, also knuckles

no idea why i just feel like if he weren't allowed to kiss your lips for any reason he would kiss there

but he definitely needed you to initiate the physical contact when you first started dating

speaking of which

dates with sae

100% movie nights, or just staying at home in general

mans hates going out if it's unnecessary

although, if you want anything he'd do it for you in an instant

or when he's feeling extra energetic

he'll take you dancing; this can either be ballroom dancing (which makes you cringe a bit but it's fun), salsa or literally just clubbing

i think he secretly loves clubbing at techno clubs (is that what they're called?) he hates commercial music cuz it just gets so repetitive

ideal vacation destination: somewhere isolated

like a random island in greece

or some forest in south america

idk man

he absolutely hates tourist destinations, tourists are his no.1 worst enemy

that's why you always end up going on holiday at random times of the year

"hey love, take a few days off next week. we're going to bora–bora." "it's the middle of march..." "not in bora–bora." "that's not how it works..." "i've already bought the tickets and spoken to your boss so you really just have to start packing."

now about pet names

he generally doesn't like them and thinks they're cringe and annoying

which they can be if used excessively ig

he tends to call you by a nickname or just your name

he only uses pet names when he wants something or has something to tell you that he knows you'll be angry/annoyed about

like the fact he planned a whole trip to bora–bora in middle of march and didn't tell you a thing 😞

however, if you're open about how much you hate him doing things without involving you he will change his ways

he's a quick learner after all ❤️‍🔥

[cinnbar-bun]

um um i've never requested stuff b4 so i hope this is ok and also isn't too vague / silly of a prompt ;_;...

may i request hcs for doppio x a reader who's a total dog-dad/pet parent?

like brings their dog everywhere that's not dangerous, treats them better then they treat themselves, genuinely considers murder if someone even makes a tiny negative joke abt their dog etc 😭... (or maybe just hcs abt how doppio would feel arnd a reader who has a big dog in general:3 whatever works better for u !!!) /nf

— @child-ofdust (i hope i didnt type too much help) 🐾

A/n: YEAH OF COURSE DEAR HERE U GO!!! I changed it up a bit so it's kinda a combination of both your ideas so hope that's okay <3

Doppio w/ an S/O who has a dog

Notes: GN!Reader, Doppio so pssttt there's kinda a spoiler for Part 5 do not read if you haven't seen it, minor swearing, but pretty funny and fluffy

WC: ~.6k

Doppio hasn’t had much experience with dogs. Yes, he’s seen dogs before, occasionally pet one a few times, perhaps got unlucky to be chased by many of them. He was initially worried how your dog would react to him because he’s worried your dog will hate him and run after him. 

Your dog was actually pretty kind to him, which made him so happy and relieved. Doppio is crying tears of joy that your dog does not want to maul him like a chew toy. He shouldn’t have been that surprised, honestly, but it was still a welcome treat for Doppio. 

He sees how much you love your dog and he finds it really sweet! Doppio does like to care for smaller animals and insects, and seeing that you care for your dog makes him feel better. He feels happy knowing you treat your dog with respect and tons of love. 

He would be nervous initially to care for your dog because he doesn’t want to make you or your dog uncomfortable. He’s kind of like… ‘am I allowed to touch your dog? Can I pet them? Can I brush them?’ 

Please help him, he’s never done this before and he’s very anxious. 

Doppio is acting extra gentle with your dog because he hasn’t yet gauged what is an appropriate amount of force needing to brush or clean your dog. After you teach him and get him used to it a few times, Doppio gets the hang of it and can do it on his own. 

He’s not jealous of your dog, he’s not that kind of guy. Again, he really cares for some animals and your dog is a sweetie pie. You love your dog so much, and Doppio loves you very much, so of course he’d love your dog! 

He kinda sees your dog as like… your child? In a weird way? He’s just like yep, this is my beloved and this is our dog <3 I love my family <3 

And unlike a certain other man who shall not be named he does not abandon his family <3

He has so much fun playing with you and your dog. Especially if your dog likes to jump on him and snuggle him he loves it so much!!! Fluffy attack he’s laughing so hard until there are tears pouring down his face. 

Also, he takes his dog duties so seriously. If you ask him to walk the dog or give the dog a bath, Doppio is preparing like he’s going to war. He’s so focused and determined and nothing will stop him from caring for your dog. Absolutely nothing can break his concentration and so help him if anything dares to interrupt or prevent him from-

Torurururururu!

He’s quickly picking up a dog bone and straight up just YELLS at Diavolo. 

“What the HELL do you want? Huh? I’m walking my dog! Don’t you know how to time shit correctly? I’M BUSY!!!!” 

Doppio is so angry at Diavolo for calling him at these times, he just gets incredibly frustrated at him for interrupting his time with you and your cute dog. 

After he gets off the “phone” he needs lots of snuggles and kisses from you and your dog or else he might pop a blood vessel. 

Hilarious idea but Diavolo telling Doppio what to do with your dog whenever Doppio gets confused or is unsure of what do. 

“Ah, damn, what is the dog food we get again?” He says at the store. “The blue one.” “This one?” “Yeah. That one.” “Thanks, boss.”

[smoozie]

I want to hear about the skeablings please please please

Oh I haven't thought abt them in a while they are sooo fun

Okay so they are specifically from my modern life series au, I don't really see them all as siblings in 'canon' or any other au of mine. They started because I thought it was interesting that Grian and Jimmy are often hc as brothers, Jimmy and Lizzie are canonically siblings (in esmp1), and Pearl and Grian are also a popular sibling hc. So I combined them for the sillies.

Their birth order has Grian and Lizzie as the oldests (they are twins), then Pearl, and then Jimmy.

All of them have fish fin ears, scales across their faces like freckles, and a pair of wings. But they have some variance in fishy and birdness.

Lizzie is the least birdlike with a small pair of vestigial wings on her back being the only indication. She is, however, the most fishy of the group. She has fins on her forearms, calves, and thighs, webbed fingers (with a blue tint), and she is the only one with actual gills.

Grian has large swan wings from his back. He doesn't have many fish features outside of the few they all share (only fins on his forearms), but something abt his face is considered strangely fishy to even his dearest friends

Pearl's wings match that of a starling. She has fins on her forearms and calves. She also possesses an affinity for shiny things that outshines all her siblings

Jimmy has his classic canary wings. However, he struggles with flying compared to Pearl and Grian because of their smaller size. He more often uses them to glide than anything else. He has fish fins on his calves as well.

[struck-by-the-rain]

i hc them as a silly space friend group an they all go to watch each others various performances

they meet up for Space Brunch every week and have a group chat w wayyy to many inside jokes

space gramps, cosmic girl and johann sebastian bach (I guess) are also kinda there on the periphery i suppose in a "your friend's chill parents" way

i have so many silly thoughts/scenarios in my head about this gang I bet they get up to loads of shenanigans

edit - I woke up today to realise I forgot ABT air batter >:( pls pretend he's there

[the-s1lly-corner]

i think it would be so cute if you wrote headcannons abt silly little things johnathan ohnn would do around alchemax when him and reader are coworkers. imagine their desks next to each other 🥲

Random hcs for Jonathan Ohnn and his coworker!

Didnt know if you wanted this romantic or platonic so I'm writing this as

Both?? If that makes sense?? Like majority is neutral with a more romantic segment at the end?? Help

Side note I love this gif

Anyways not proof read we die like uncle Aaron

Obligatory you guys leave things on each others desks; notes, snacks, a drink, ect ect ect

You both also have your own set of inside jokes, and probably gossip about y'alls other coworkers

Probably just a me thing because I love dynamics like this but yall are just. Constantly bubbly around each other, like

Yall can glance at each other and make a slightly goofy expression and the other is trying to hold it together

I just wanna see Jonathan happy, man :( his whole Jonathan to spot transition kinda actually makes me sad like bro was just doing his job

Anyway

I feel like Jonathan can get fairly wrapped up in his work; forgets to take breaks.. he really appreciates when you come over and leave a bottle of water on the edge of his desk, makes him feel cared for

Side tangent but I personally hc that even before becoming Spot he never really had many friends, much less ones that look out for his wellbeing like that. Doesn't help that he's kinda

Awkward and closed off but hes not

Evil or mean spirited (yet/hj)

"Jon you gotta start standing up straight" "UHHHGGHH *fine* dad/mom!!🙄/j" and similar interactions

Whenever you two are assigned hands on work/experiment shit yall are both just. Bouncing off each other the entire time if that makes sense

Like yall are a power duo; you guys get the work done in no time and actually?? Have fun?? Work goes by fast when you're doing it with someone you enjoy being around

Hopping back in the silly stuff he would NOT stand up for himself if someone was taking his lunch; and if he does he makes like. A piss poor attempt at standing up for himself sooo if you're on the fierce side (or just have a backbone) he would really appreciate it

"Excuse me he asked for NO pickles!"/j

Now onto the romance yahoo

Tbh I dont know if alchemax would be the type of company to outright ban coworkers from having relationships with one another, I can kinda see it swinging either way

But I've never been good at writing hcs for characters needing to slink around so let's say it allows that stuff

Anyways

Jonathan is an awkward sap, like

Imagine glancing over at his computer and seeing him looking up pickup lines (bad corny ones)

He uses them 5 minutes later on you

Stuff like that

Also while I dont normally like characters that dip into the clingy/jealous category Jonathan/spot is an exception simply because I legitimately cant see him not being at least a little insecure

But the good news about being a scientist is that hes good at problem solving; he communicates!!

You guys are both so

Obvious

At least he is; one good compliment and hes red in the face

Outright flirt with him and hes basically glowing red

Back to the bad pick up lines he will be over the moon if you say one back

Building off the "you guys leave things on each others desks" thing he leaves like. Flowers and candies he knows you like on the desk

A moment of silence for your desk when your birthday or valentines day happens 😔

Imagine someone hits on you and he just

Wanders over, puts a hand on your shoulder and just

"Theyre taken"

But like, in a cringey ☝️🤓 way

😭😭

[isa-ghost]

some qphil and pomme hcs 🥹? i was thinking abt the rescue we were robbed of

Okay bear with me, I didn't get to see her a lot because I didn't watch most POVs she was on so these might not be spicy and deep or smth, they'll mostly be silly or surface level stuff. 😭

Phil headcanons masterlist

He thinks she's one of, if not THE most brilliant egg. Pomme's mind is something else /pos. He'd love to sit down and pick her brain sometime as one big brain to another (though he'd never admit he's big brain).

He makes dad jokes about Chayanne making anything apple flavored/centric like "How could you cook Pomme like that D:" and it always gets him smacked by both Chay and Lullah.

And then he'll see Pomme and be like YOU'RE ALIVE :O!! and watches her scramble like ?!?!?! before dying laughing and explaining himself. Etoiles has started to get in on this, much to Pomme's dismay.

He makes so many apple-related dad jokes in general, he enjoys watching all the kids die inside too much when he makes them. He doesn't even LIKE dad jokes that much, he's just a shithead.

He actively encourages Pomme to "compete" with Richas in collecting dads

There have been multiple occasions where they've had a Moment of some sort with or without other people around and he's told Pomme how much of her parents he can see in her. He's talked about seeing Baghera, Etoiles, and Pierre.

Phil loves the way Pomme just kinda blends in with her parents. She's not a Mommy's Girl or a Daddy's Girl. If she's with Baghera she's a lot like her and that her is different than when she's with Etoiles and those are both different from when she's with Pierre. And so on. Phil finds it endearing that Pomme takes after each and every parent and how it really shows when she's with them individually.

The couple times she (usually also with Dapper or Richas) would come to Phil in the wake of big stressful things going on, it was because she knew of all the islanders, Phil is one of the ones who's no doubt seen the most in his lifetime. He Gets It. He'll be real and raw about it, he won't sugarcoat just because she's a little girl. He'll level with her, and that kind of insight and comfort is what she needs in those trying times.

I think if Phil was Pomme's parent then she would've pulled a Chayanne and personally beat Ender King's ass right out of his body. And she'd spend day and night beforehand painstakingly plotting a plan to ensure it goes right too.

My memory is fuzzy on Pomme's first day, but I remember Phil being on high alert while the French were getting on their feet and offering everything he could in order to help keep Pomme safe while they settled in. Pomme's never forgotten that. If there were ever a crisis that left all of the French AND Bad + their bases inaccessible or unsafe, she'd go straight to Phil next. She knows how much effort he puts into keeping his bases safe and secure, and she knows he has always dropped everything at any moment no matter what in order to prioritize the eggs.

God these two shake hands on the insomnia fr. The only reason Phil eventually passes out is bc of his weird universe transcending fuckery. He may willingly Go to sleep but his ass doesn't willingly Fall asleep if that makes sense. Brain too busy going 90 miles a minute.

Phil's never thought abt this but I am: Of all the eggs, I think Pomme is one of the ones who would survive the best in his Hardcore World. She'd lock the FUCK in.

And Phil would've seen that if we weren't robbed of the rescue. 😔 The rescue would've changed how Phil views Pomme in a positive way I think.

Because as of right now, he just feels awful that Pomme has to grow up and be mature so much faster. There are too many horrors, she just doesn't let herself be a kid. Chayanne does similar things but he at least still let's himself be a kid. It saddens Phil that Pomme seems to think she can't be, even if she wants to be. :(

If he wasn't afraid of an awful accident happening, he'd probably spar with her. She's the daughter of Etoiles, he has no doubt she's a lil fireball. But he only trusts himself to spar with Chayanne and Lullah. (I think I've said this somewhere already,, hm. Well at least I'm consistent LMAO)

[starry-907]

hi starry!!! <3 i've been seeing so many stick men on my dash, and i've gotten super curious. the fandom wiki page answered none of my questions, so i thought i'll turn to the resident expert <3 <3 <3 whomst may be these characters and where do they come from?

RESIDENT EXPERT SJDLFJSKDJ THANK YOU I GUESS?? i'm just very autistic abt these silly sticks, i don't think i'm much of an expert

the stickfigures are from Alan Becker's Animation Vs series/franchise (calling it a franchise seems wrong but there's multiple series under the umbrella so idk how else to describe it) on youtube! i'm gonna go into more detail on that but i'm putting it under a cut because i don't know how long this'll get to be completely honest

also sorry if this takes a while to get answered i wanted to collect screenshots and visuals

So i'm not gonna get into a full play-by-play, mainly to avoid spoiling you, but the series can be kinda split up into a few different categories (the first two being the "primary" series of the overarching series)

ALSO the creator refers to all the sticks with he/him but a lot of people tend to headcanon differently (it's me i'm people) so i might use my own hc pronouns for characters. honestly part of the series' appeal is the fact that there's wiggle room for headcanons to emerge.

anyway! starting off with the og:

Animator vs Animation

animator vs animation starts off with the simple question of, "hey what if my drawings came to life and fought me", which is somewhat of the overarching question through the first 3 installments

the fourth one winds up turning that question on it's head by the end because of this silly li'l guy, The Second Coming (usually called second or orange by the fandom)

by the end of ava 4, second (and the friends they found on a website) have reached an understanding with the animator (who's also alan, it's a bit confusing but i try to think of it like mcyt rules where there's the creator and then the character), and are now friends with him. ava 1-4 were recently bundled into being animator vs animation season 1, i'd recommend you start with these four if you want to watch the other series.

ava seasons 2 and 3 (season 3 is currently ongoing) take a bit of a different turn, delving into the previously left up to question fates of the past three sticks that alan had made in ava 1-3, along with also dropping some bombshells of lore here and there. semi related side note i'm taking the chosen one and shaking them in a tupperware violently.

Animation vs Minecraft

this one is the longest of the different series, with 35 episodes (36 counting the original). it also pulls off the "mainly filler eps until everything suddenly spurs into motion" thing very well. it's also funny because the series started out named as "animation vs minecraft shorts" when episodes in season 3 would get up into at least 20 minute runtimes.

this series is where we start to get personalities developed for the four sticks that second befriended in ava 4, through the lens of different minecraft niches, from animal care to potions to redstone to noteblocks.

avm seasons 1 and 2 focus more on exploring the different aspects of minecraft (such as build battles), though season 1 does have a very brief arc involving this other stick, purple

(purple shows up in later episodes as well)

speaking of purple, if you're watching animation vs minecraft as a whole, make sure to watch animation vs leauge before you get to season 3 otherwise there could be a brief moment of confusion.

"but starry idk anything about minecraft-" THAT'S OK!! sorry for yelling i got excited. the series does a pretty good job of laying down the basics of the more complex mechanics before the stickfigures proceed to take it to heights that are probably not achievable in vanilla.

"starry what about season 3-" I'M GLAD YOU ASKED sorry got excited again. season 3 takes a hard pivot from "semi-unconnected episodes with maybe a few overarching elements" to "fully episodic adventures that will genuinely make you a bit emotional at times near the end". it also starts with blue going to find netherwart before the escalation escalates and trust me once you know how the season ends that seems so much funnier.

season 4 goes back to the less sequential episodes, just with a few status quo updates from the end of season 3 added in, namely the occasional addition of two characters from season 3 that people go feral over seeing included.

I'LL ALSO USE THIS SPACE TO TALK ABOUT THE ACTUAL SHORTS, which, as stated, are shorts that don't have a runtime over a minute or a minute and a half. they're somewhat of a mix between minecraft themed and being themed around other aspects of the series (there's one where the sticks and alan try to max out a clicker game, for example).

animation vs education

these ones are a bit less "plot" and a little more "hey look at this cool thing". the only character we're familiar with to be in this is second, and we essentially follow them going through these various black spaces exploring different educational concepts. right now we have avmath, avphysics, and avgeometry.

they all manage to be engaging and interesting even when the concept being explored reaches the point where you might not understand what the heck is going on (a big example for me being when avphysics started getting into more theoretical stuff, the sequence was cool enough that i didn't even care that half of it was going over my head).

i also feel like these are the ones that people unfamiliar with the series are likely to find? at least when i mention the series usually if someone's heard of it it's cuz they've watched avmath or avphysics.

even though these don't seem to have any connection to the main series (though a lot of people hc that they're second's dreams), i still recommend giving these a watch if for no other reason that they're really cool!

influencer arc

this one's the newest bit added to the umbrella! it's a 3-episode arc about one of the sticks, green, making a youtube channel with his friends and also exploring adobe products. we only have one episode of this so far, and it was funny because everyone was literally going feral over it when it released.

this one's also fun because there's an actual youtube channel for green, so you can see the full version of the videos they make in the episodes! the channel was leaked before the episode release so everyone went feral over that then too. the videos on the channel are very much "kids messing around with a camera" vibes.

the one-off eps

there's quite a number of these that explore different things, like animation vs youtube, where second and green manage to tick off a video player, or the team trees and team seas videos where blue gets the ability to grow trees and remove trash with money (at least in second's dreams). like i said, for understanding one aspect of avm season 3 (namely why everyone's fairly chill with purple when meeting them), i recommend watching animation vs leauge before reaching season 3, purple shows up there.

if you want me to go more in depth about the characters themselves (with some of my headcanons bleeding through a li'l), let me know and i can make a part two! i recommend giving the series a watch if you want to understand better but you'll likely want to break it up into more managable chunks

i also wrote most of this while on the bus to work

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

ari i’m curious do u have kenny hcs

RIKO U HAVE NO IDEA THE MONSTER UVE UNLEASHED.....

i do have some kenny hcs <333 take a seat here's a snack we’re gonna be here for a while 🧁🧃 (THANK YOU FOR INDULGING ME <3 this man genuinely makes me feel ill im sooo delusional abt him)

okok so first of all; general hcs !!

he likes art!! loves art!! this one is canon to me i just think he is so interested in any and all of humanity’s creative outlets and ofc art is the most prominent one. he loves all different forms of art — from sculptures to paintings to writing to video games (HEAVY on the latter btw i think he's so entranced by new technology) and so on.

and on that note!! i think he paints and writes himself :3 hes been alive for so long, learned so many languages, there's no way he didn't have time to pick up a paint brush. i think he paints to release stress!! and his styles vary but there's something mildly macabre abt all of his pieces. tends to gravitate towards expressionism above all else, especially the abstract kind.

i also feel like he sincerely enjoys ”bad” art like low budget movies and modern romance fiction and goofy video games…… he just thinks they're fun. def gets a good laugh out of them (this man canonically had a whole comedy phase he just wants to have fun!!)

and and and!! this is self indulgent as hell but i also think he cooks. there's just so much to learn when it comes to different cultures and their cuisine and i think they all interest him. but i hesitate to say that he's a good cook bc i feel like he’d make really weird fucked up food combinations just for the hell of it…. he's a freak. 100% the type to mix orange juice w black coffee just to see how it tastes.

i also hc that he has a soft spot for children, seeing as he literally carried and birthed one of his own LMAO... i just think he admires the innocence of childhood !! that childish and simple hope that adults tend to lose. he's very good w them too!! gentle and patient. and in geto’s body he has the softest nicest voice so i feel like kids gravitate towards him (i'm just thinking abt that One scene where he blows bubbles at a playground and all the kids chase them… they love him i just know he's a regular at that park)

OH AND……. idk if i’d call this a hc exactly but i just wanna see kenny in more feminine clothing. he literally has All the genders i don't think for a second that he cares abt gender norms. one moment he's in that tacky middle aged divorced father core hawaiian tshirt (he's so Me), the next he's wearing a purple floral dress or a puffy turtleneck <33 i just think he could pull anything off.

NOW FOR THE GOOD STUFF……. relationship hcs <33333 hes a whole red flag but hes also my silly pookie bear just trust me on this

FIRST OF ALL he's huge on quality time. if he's in a relationship w u then that means he sincerely enjoys ur company and therefore has a tendency to just bring u with him wherever he goes. otherwise he gets bored and starts whining abt it (silly silly man) hes a lonely guy ok </3 i feel like he gets very sudden urges to explore new places / do new things and he’ll make sure you’re right there w him !! you’ll wake up in his arms only to find you're in a snowy forest or some shit and he just WILL not tell u where he's taken u bc its ”a surprise ^_^” LMAOO

he also takes on a teaching role in the relationship and i think that's where hes happiest !! gets a kick out of it but it's also kind of special to him. especially if you haven't seen much of the world, or if you're just a naturally curious person — preferably both. he just enjoys teaching you new things, leading you towards new sights, drinking in your expressions and reactions. it's precious to him. something to cherish.

ON THAT NOTE i think he has this unquenchable curiosity that gets temporarily sated when he tries to like . Dissect you. see inside your mind. it's like hes solving a puzzle that never runs out of pieces. hear me out riko but i see him as somewhat similar to makima, he's detached and has trouble connecting w people and handles you almost like a math equation….. but since he unlike makima is a human being, i think he still has the capacity to grow to care for you and treat you like an equal (or something close to an equal). he genuinely does love you, but he's rusty. kenjaku just wants to know all there is to know about you — every single thing. he’d dig into your brain if he could, but he’ll settle on just brewing you tea, listening to you speak about your fears, hoping it’ll give him the same insight.

he's a little possessive . kind of a Lot. idk i just think he feels a pang of jealousy when he sees u laugh and have fun w someone else (he's like a preschooler getting pouty bc his bestie is playing w someone else LOL) and that makes him Uncomfortable so he just waltzes in and steals u away w a smooth smile and a hand on ur waist. pretends like it doesn't bother him in the slightest but if u tease him too much he drops the smile and gives u a Look (it's scary as hell so u immediately shut up LMAOO) and god forbid someone else is like… teaching u something… a subject they're knowledgeable abt while u sit there listening happily to their rambling……..... ohhh he gets so jealous it's funny. researches that particular subject in frightening detail JUST so he can correct your little friend and teach u abt it himself <33 weirdo. freak.

also (this is extremely important to understanding kenny's character) he's both mother coded and father coded but in the worst possible ways.

he's mother coded in the sense that he's a smidge controlling, good at coaxing you into doing things outside your comfort zone, an expert at making you feel guilty by acting especially sweet and gentle, has the ability to make you cry w one disappointed look etc etc

and he's father coded in the sense that he's easily offended but pretends not to be, wants to see you succeed so bad that it's almost more for him than you, forces you to have really deep onesided philosophical talks at 2am when you just want to sleep, sucks at voicing his love for you out loud so he just buys a bag of your favorite fruit, cuts them into slices and calls it a day. etc etc. he's awful actually. i need him

but !!! as for more soft hcs i think he's honestly an affectionate guy deep down… like deep deep down but it's there. he just likes having u close. preferably touching him. not constantly bc that’ll annoy him but he wants you to stay near so he can pull u into his lap whenever. loves reading to u while u rest ur head on his thigh, playing w ur hair and lulling u softly to sleep <3333 (it's the geto kinnie in him) AND idk why this came into my mind but i think he likes nose kisses. just bc ur face scrunches up and he thinks it's cute. he can be sweet !! probably.

OHHH AND he loves playing board games w u <33 everything from chess to monopoly. he thinks it's fun + a good bonding activity but it's only fun in the beginning. he's condescending if u lose and petty if u win but he’ll still ask u to stay up w him all night just so u can finish the game (he's insufferable actually) if u decline he’ll huff and play by himself while shooting u petty glares until u feel bad and join him. then he's back to being all suave and calm and mature ohhhh i hate him

he wants to be the mature stoic indulgent person in the relationship sooooo fucking bad but he’s plagued by silly impulses day and night. he’s just good at hiding it. but deep down he is and always will be a silly nerd <33

and finally; i think that in a no curses au he's significantly less of a freak but still weird and obsessive and a lil mean. bullies u just a tinyyy bit and acts condescendingly sweet but he cares for u a whole bunch. probably struggles w showing it in a way that isn't too overbearing or mildly alarming… maybe through writing. poems and paintings of u… sculptures…. just wants to portray the beauty he sees in u (can u tell artist!kenny makes me go a little crazy)

overall hes a weirdo hes a freak (def wants u to kiss his brain just to see how it feels) and he may or may not be a bundle of red flags but i love him dearly <333 hes a silly goose. i want to study him in a lab

[gvtted-ratz]

Not to sound desperate or anything but headcannons abt Dr. W. Afton with a male s/o 😭 there is literally nothing abt him

Dr. W. Afton with a M!S/O

Last Edited: 11/05/2024

TW: none

AO3 LINK

Anon: Not to sound desperate or anything but headcannons abt Dr. W. Afton with a male s/o 😭 there is literally nothing abt him

Word Count: 418

Notes from gvtted-ratz (writer/creator): You get both of our ideas for this, Anon. Enjoy. And some are just very silly because our friends are very silly. Just silly little guys, gals, and pals. 

Notes from @rppik (editor/co-writer): (reading about Afton for first time) he has a fiance……….. LIVING WITH FIANCE? SLUT. PREMARITAL WHORE

rppik hcs:

• It takes a minute for him to get jokes, sometimes you have to repeat them or explain them to the point that it isn't funny anymore, but being patient with it means a lot to him.

• Will openly guffaw if you make a physics joke, though.

• He wants to like black coffee because it's quicker to prepare, but he's way into different flavored creamers (get new ones for him to try.)

• Sensitive nipples. I can tell by looking at him.

• Gets awful eye strain headaches at times. Loves being doted on when it happens, because it does help, but he also just finds it touching that you care.

• Listen, I just get the vibe that maybe he was denied a lot of indulgence or affection growing up, so any act of kindness isn't lost on him. Whether your love language is words of affirmation or acts of service, anything, he eats it up and reciprocates in his own way.

• 100% gets clingy or cuddly when tired. Will lay his head on your shoulder and grumble when you insist he get to bed already.

• Will play with your hands. Giving them gentle little squeezes when you get him out of the house for a walk, running his fingers over the lines and ridges when he thinks you're asleep, holding them to his cheek when he's feeling affectionate. 

gvtted-ratz hcs:

• You sneak little love notes in his many pockets.

• He likes to info-dump on his boyfriend when he gets home.

• Will say he doesn’t enjoy his fellow straightening out his coat before he leaves for work, but he’s lying.

• His face gets flushed whenever his boyfriend tells him he’s been missed while away or given any sort of tender words.

• Can’t help but forget his glasses are on the top of his head and has his partner remind him that, no, he did not, in fact, lose them.

• At the end of the day, he enjoys cuddling up next to you; if it’s been extremely stressful, he enjoys it when his hair is played with.

• Likes to remind his beau that they are all made up matter; there have been times he’s gone on rambles about electrical phenomenons.

• Sometimes he’ll bring some gifts with him: sweets, new pens, the pair of boxers he thought were his but were actually yours that he ruined by putting it in the wash with the colours, making them bright pink.

[thedeepstate69]

Valorant sexuality nd gender hc’s

I’ve have so many thoughts abt val characters gender istg

(also maybe don’t take this too seriously)

Astra:

Straight but the biggest ally you’ll ever meet

(She/Her)

Breach:

Angry gay

Very cis

Kind of the cool gay uncle

Raze came out to him and he just sat there like??

Breach: Lesbian? I thought you were Portuguese 

Raze: ...Breach I’m Brazilian 

Brimstone:

KJ came out to him and it went smth like:

KJ: Brim i’m gay

Brimstone: Hi gay im brimstone

Straight but he’s for the gays

His pronouns are U/S/A (eagle screech plays in background)

Chamber:

Queer and homophobic in a way only Europeans can be

Cypher:

Bisexual perhaps with a side of genderqueer

Deadlock:

Women lover

A she/they

Would cry over beautiful women

Fade:

They are so nonbinary 

They/She/He Fade is so real to me

Also a women enjoyer just isn’t a fan of labels

Ace spec fr

Gekko:

Green hair nd pronouns

Bisexual

Harbor:

No one really knows???

He’s either very supportive of his bros or is somewhat fruity

Him nd Astra kinda goals ngl

Jett:

Bisexual

Women?

Kay/o:

My boy is made of 1′s nd 0′s i do not think he could care less

Killjoy:

Lesbian

Her gender is science

Neon:

Pansexual

Blue hair nd pronouns fr

My little silly

Omen:

The voices

Phoenix:

I told a friend of mine (who doesnt play val) that phoenix has two mums and she just looked at him and said “he looks like the type” ????

Bisexual but scared of women

Raze:

The biggest women lover 

gender is whats in your pants??? alright *pulls out several explosives*

Reyna:

Lesbian

Men anti 

Sage:

Trans, cottagecore lesbian

Mother???

Skye:

Aro Ace as fuck bro

Sex?? Romance?? nah mate the forest

Her nd dealock r in a queer platonic relationship 

Sova:

*Rubs my hands together evily*

Trans, gay Sova

You can pry this hc from my cold body

Viper:

Transfem

Straight but still anti men

Yoru:

Trans

Homophobic homosexual ngl

Phoenix tries to show any affection nd hes just like >:0 thats gay

Bonus:

Ruben pontes nd Oran McEneff:

Both gay

My actual OTP

I get sad when I think abt them

[teddybeartoji]

okay like i tried to put this in comments but it was getting messy so

when you talk about film prof, or more generally just film nerd toji, my mind like associates it with canon. idk i think its like weird but i like use it to create a background for the hc / au

so like (this is only me but im so here if you have any different takes!!!) in my mind, after toji became an assassin again he probably bar hopped a lot just for a place to hang out and ate out and thats where he started enjoying them.

and that translates into film nerd toji au where he knows the most niche and fun movies because of whatever was on tv when he was growing up. sometimes its a fairly recent movie or sometimes its like this ollllddd 50/60s movie and he’s so nerdy about it like ‘oh how did they film this back in the day?’ or different techniques or how some recent movie was actually inspired by this reeeaaaally old novel.

but like i love the image of when youre dating and he just blurts out random facts throughout and it could be annoying but its toji so its endearing and you just looooove listening to him go on about what hes so passionate about and you have this look and if he notices it his ears go SOOOOOOOO red and his heart starts racing and he cant help but kiss you silly so you stop staring at him with stars in your eyes. and i already said this but equally as fun when you ask him questions nonstop and hes like head over heels. OR YOURE JUST AS FILM NERDY AS HIM.

THIS GOT A LOT LONGER THAN IT WAS MEANT TO BE THERES SOOOOO MUCH TO WORK WITH WND ITS SOOOO FUN. BUT BASICALLY I LOVE FILM PROF / NERD TOJI I WANT TO HEAR ALL ABOUT HIM FROM YOUR POV MICKEY !!!!!!!

:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((I LOVE YOU FILM NERD TOJI I LOVE YOU SOO FUCKING MUCH LIKE HE'S EVERYTHING . TO ME SCAR:(((((((((((((( i think he has seen so many different films bc he always used them as a way to kind of escape his life yk? and i truly believe he's a big cinema guy like that's one thing he's willing to put his money on he just wants to not think about anything else wahhhhhh oh and the image of small little toji sitting in front of the tv watching some old old movie:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((( i'm gonna get sad i'm gonna stop now

ANYWAYY THE RED EARSSSS OH MY GODDD I'M GONNA FAINTT HE GETS SO EMBARRASSED WHEN HE CATCHES HIMSELF RAMBLING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WAITT AND HIS WAY TO STOP YOU FROM YOU STARING AT HIM IS TO KISS YOU SILLY?!?"?!="?!"!?"? DO YOU WANT ME DEADDDD SCAR I LOVE HIM I'M SORRY I KEEP SAYING IT BUT HE'S JUST SO IMPORTANT TO ME AND NOW WE'VE BUT TWO OF MY MOST LOVED THINGS TOGETHER AND I'M MELTING AWAYYYYYYYYYYY

i think it's so cute to think abt me and film nerd toji bc then it's.. double film nerd asghdghsaghdashg we're taking turns telling each other very random little facts and then we both get to tease each other for being so lame and cute and it's perfect i wanna kiss him so bad:((((((((((((((((((((((((((

[melikedraw]

hi hi hiiii!!!11!!

wondering whether u cld write hcs abt gaolang with someone like basically the complete opposite of him… imagine like an extroverted, loud, outspoken constantly happy s/o… lives to party and just overall loves the thrill of life and r defo friends with saw paing i can jst envision it

(if u already did something like this mb😓)

literally like snooki or jwoww from jersey shore or smthing IDK!!! ive just had it in my head 4 so long and can imagine them getting into so many different scenarios of s/o running around like batshit crazy getting into all sorts of shit and gaolang is just… there trying to keep them under control or smthing

id love 4 u to add in ur own little things with this if u do do it mwah ok love from poland🫶🫶

Gaolang with an extroverted s/o

Gaolang x gn! reader

Fluff, reader being silly

~~~~~

- he finds you overwhelming at first, due to you loud and erratic nature, and will try to avoid you

- he won't ignore you if you find him or anything but will not purposely try to get to know you either

- you kind of remind him of saw paing, which is not a good start because he's already fed up with that one

- definitely accidentally called you saw paing in the first few weeks of knowing you

- he keeps telling himself that he doesn't need another saw paing in his life, but he can't help being drawn to you

- he feels the need to make sure you're safe and alright because of how thrill seeking you are

- if you're lucky, he might even join you in your silly escapades, but he draws the line at anything that will directly embarrass him in public (he has an image to uphold)

- in private, though, he will do almost anything for you, he's like a big puppy in a way

- want to give him 5 inch acrylic nails? Alright, he'll keep them for a day or two (they probably break off from his daily activities)

- put makeup on him? Fine, but no pictures

- dress him up? He admired your dedication of getting costumes that fit him properly

- where am I going with this? No idea

- will act like a parent/guardian/older brother figure to you

- willing to bail you out of any situation, but will give you a long lecture about it on the way home with lots of sighing and "I'm not angry, just disappointed"

- he'll make you put his number as your emergency contact

- if you go out late at night, he tries his best to accompany you (he most likely has work the next day tho, so don't bank on it), or have someone you both trust to go with you

- make sure you text him once you get home, or he'll be awake all night worrying

- I wouldn't call gaolang a pessimist, he's more of a realist with a resting bitch face

- so let's say you're an idealist, positive to the point of naivety, as if you live in a bubble of a world that only has good things, believing that all things will go your way

- he doesn't mind it, in fact he's glad you aren't irritatingly pessimistic or anything, but he does find your mindset foolish

- though he will do whatever it takes to give you that life free from all things bad, if that's what you want

- you better not get into his personal space though, especially when you two first met

- if you disregard it, you'll definitely have a hard time getting friendly with him because he will not accept someone who can't respect boundaries

- despite this, you'll wear him down soon enough, just as saw paing had

- your positivity definitely rubs off on him, not that he'll admit it

- you'll catch him smiling around you more often, but don't mention it or he'll immediately drop it to a scowl

- in conclusion, you're his silly rabbit and he loves you very much

[paper-cities]

op I am SCREAMING TO YOU ABOUT KILLUGON THEY ARE THE BRAINWORMS THE VOICES

Other than that I hope you understand how much the tags on your last kitty Killua post hurt me (and made me laugh, emotional rollercoaster love it)

Don't mind me I'm just going insane and I'd love to scream more at you but I NEED YOUR KG HEADCANONS SO WE CAN SCREAM TOGETHER

HI HELLO ANON!!! Ty for allowing me to break your heart w silly killugon animal au!!!!! I can fit SO MUCH hurt/comfort into these bad boys <33

Incoming rambling under the cut (I'm sorry)

I posted some general killugon hcs here but there are always more soooo:

-Alluka and Nanika bond with Gon super quick. Killua finds it incredibly charming.

-Everyone else knows Gon and Killua are meant to be for AGES before they realize it. It makes Leorio want to scream sometimes, but Kurapika holds him back because "they have to get together on their own time. No one should rush them."

-Gon with dimples, need I say more?

Also I'm obsessed with my silly animal au rn so here's some hcs for that too (sorry):

-I think in this AU animal features are rare and part of the reason Killua and Gon bond. Killua and Alluka/Nanika are the only Zoldycks to inherit their dad's animal features and the Zoldycks take this as part of the reason Killua needs to be the next heir.

-Killua's pupils dilate and he slow blinks like a cat at Gon sometimes. Gon is oblivious to what this means (i trust you/love you in cat speak). Someone points it out one day and Killua is ridiculously embarrassed bcus he doesnt realize hes doing it.

-Gon wags his tail so hard his whole bottom half shakes sometimes. Ofc hes hit his tail on many things (and people) leading to numerous injuries both to himself and others. After he gets it docked (partly due to injuries inflicted on him and the aforementioned injuries he gives himself) he basically just wags his whole butt when hes excited. Killua thinks its super cute but would never admit it.

-If they're apart Gon likes to carry something that smells like Killua (a shirt or jacket) because he's got a blood hound sense of smell. He finds it immensely comforting. Before they get together Gon makes up excuses about why he's doing it, after they're official he admits the truth and Killua feels like an idiot for not noticing sooner.

-Gon gets called guard dog by strangers sometimes because of how he protects Mito, then Killua, and eventually Alluka and Nanika too. Killua jokingly calls him a "good boy". It's meant to be patronizing, but totally gives Gon butterflies. He tries to play it off, but flushing cheeks and fierce wagging give him away every time.

-Play bite each other when wrestling as kids on their limbs. When they reunite as adults who dont know how to handle emotions they end up wrestling again and Gon bites Killua on the neck. They both get too flustered to keep fighting and make up excuses to stop and pretend like theyre totally not in love with each other because it's Very Normal And Very Not At All Romantic to leave bite marks on your friend.

ANYWAY IF YOU READ ALL THAT YOURE A TROOPER TY and ofc pls scream to me abt your hcs!!!!!!!

[mcclintcock]

what r ur hcs for Dan im curious

at one point i actually had a list somewhere of all my veep headcanons but i made it in my notes app for some reason and its buried under notes about my real life but heres what i got off the top of my head

he was a lifeguard as a teenager (he has lifeguard energy idfk)

he was a competitive swimmer as a teenager (again just vibes, he was a god at 400IM)

bpd (purely projection, i feel it's based in canon but i don't think someone without bpd would see it)

substance abuse (so many people in this show are canon irresponsible w prescription meds i mean dc is a stressful place)

he and selina fucked like years ago but she doesn't remember (based on when they almost fuck like idk why i get the vibe that it wasnt the first time)

he had a shit childhood this is basically canon

he has depression+anxiety+bpd (purely based on vibes)

i think he is a lot goofier than he lets on like i think when he is very comfortable w someone he is v silly but he isnt v comfortable w anyone, i just think no one who isnt a goofy lil goober would be able to write an extended parody of 50 ways to leave your lover hes a goofy lil guy okay, he is also rly quick witted and funny like in an alternate universe he is a writer on snl, he's just chandler bing if chandler had rizz

post-canon he retires early after making a shit-ton of money and just kinda travels about w hot women (i have not seen s7 maybe this is canon i know they have a peek at every character's future in the last ep but whatever)

i think he does have like literally a dozen illegitimate children and the doctor at the fertility clinic with marjorie and catherine was just incorrect and the test was a fluke bc didnt he get amy pregnant ?? idk i haven't seen s7

he has some kind of weird daddy issues thing with kent, in the early seasons he rly wants to be friends w kent (i read some fic abt this idfk) and he just wants to go on a little boat trip (fishing trip...? idk i just know hes good at fishing so he mustve done it as a kid right?) w his father figure (the seasickness thing contraindicates this but whatevs)

his brother has kids and dan is surprisingly good w his nieces and nephews like once they get older and theyre like young adults he is the cool uncle who will let them throw parties in his beach house and if his niece has like a shitty bf dan will punch him

idk i have so many headcanons these are just what i could come up with rn