#i have seen some people worried that sam will not be playing this scenes but it still can be him

[hyohaehyuk]

sanlelio: never forget that Jacob wants to do "The Tale of the Body Thief" scenes with Sam. and this is just one of those scenes. this book is awful and have most of the horniest scenes of this awful series. jacob simply gets it

Video: Podsluchane.pl | Wywiad z Jacobem Andersonem – „Wywiad z wampirem” (AMC, 2022) – Polskie napisy

[dirtylittlefairytales]

Don't play with fire | - Part 2 - |

Autors Note: I recommend to read Part 1 first. This is going to be a rollercoaster, but I hope you like it. I liked writing it and I'm really happy I started writing again. Now I try writing smut too. If you like the song 'Unholy from Sam Smith' listening to it later on, made the scene better. At least I listened to it while I wrote the scene.

Also as before, english is not my first language, I hope I corrected most mistakes.

Summary: After having a panic attack and realizing that Cooper could be the Butcher., you tried living your life normally again, until you got a text from an unknown number. Should you go to the police? Half a year later everything is normal again, at least you think it is.

-> Writing in 'italic' is supposed to be the your thoughts

Warnings: Dark!Fic, Describing of a Panic attack, Age Gap! (Legal), Swearing! Praise! Alcohol consumption!, drugs!, bit of Smut, Angst!, Arguing

Rating: R

Word count: 7,4k

Tagging: @a-movie-that-youve-never-seen, @amethystblackkchaos, @hereforthehitsbaby, @waywardtigersandwich

That was your first panic attack you had in your life. You spend that day at the hospital, your mom picking you up in the evening. She didn’t pry for information, although she was very worried. When you got back to her house and sat in the living room over a hot tea, you told her everything– Though more like everything she could know.

You told her about the concert, how you weren’t feeling well because of the crowd of people. So you went home early, then your bike got stolen and your boss fired you after some nasty words. You said you didn’t know how you ended up at the hospital, you were just aimlessly walking and then woke up in the hospital. Remembering a lot of concerned voices around you but nothing more. 

Seeing that you were near tears again your mom started to hug you for several minutes. You let it all out. All those bottle up emotions of the day. You just didn’t know what to do with all these emotions. It was too much, like you weren’t in control anymore.

“You know sweety, you should move closer again. Ah no disagreeing! Think about it. You know my grandparents also had their apartment. Please consider it, I worry about you.” she said, squeezing your shoulders. “You could save so much money!”

“Okay mom. I promise I’ll think about it, but not today. Let me find a new job first.” you tried avoiding the situation. She nodded

“Well, come one you can sleep in your old room today. Tomorrow I'll drive you to the mechanic so you can get your car back.”

“Thanks mom.”, she kissed the top of your head and pushed you towards the stairs. Shaking your head, you went up towards your old room. You could barely say no to anything, when it came to your mom. However, moving back was the one thing you didn’t want. It was stupid. You wanted to live independent and not in your moms apartment, where she probably wouldn’t even allow you to pay rent.

Stepping inside your room, everything looked as you last remembered it. Your mom tried to make it look like your old room. The big double bed near the window, with the one teddy bear on it. A small wooden closet near the wall. You closed the curtains on the window and went to bed. 

On the bathroom mirror you could see a bruise starting to form on your shoulder, where Cooper had gripped it. Clearly you couldn’t wear something without sleeves the next few weeks. 

Before going to sleep you checked your phone. You nearly forgot about it. There was nothing. No new contact, no number saved anywhere, everything was the same. You remember it clearly, he told you he had saved his number, but nothing. You checked your phone completely. Looked through everything, photos, deleted messages, deleted contacts. Still nothing.

‘Had he just been toying with you? Playing into your anxiety?’ After checking your phone for a second time you gave up. Maybe you imagined it, maybe you should just call it a day. As soon as you put your phone down and your head hit your pillow you were out. The events of that day were finally catching up with you. 

Waking up the next day, you still felt exhausted but overall better. True to her word, your mom drove you to the mechanic, and reminded you to visit her once a week like you promised her on her last birthday. No more work excuses. 

You promised, she was getting older and you did want to spend more time with her. She turned 59 this year. You loved her, she always did her best. Recently your grandfather passed away, leaving everything to your mom. Your grandparents had an estranged relationship with your mom, but seeing as she was their only child… she inherited it all. Now your mom could live without worries. She had a house and had a spare apartment. Seeing as they did have a bit of money.

Over the next week you wrote more job applications and went to a couple of interviews. Until you finally found yourself a new job. The company and boss seemed nice and you even got to work from home 10 days a month. Big plus and the pay was decent. You stayed in your apartment most of the time after the concert, fearing you might run into Cooper somewhere. You were quite paranoid. Fearing what he would do to you. Were you going to be next, if he was the Butcher? 

With the new job, came new energy and you started to live again. Step by step you were going outside, to the office, meeting your friends or going out for drinks. Still sometimes, you looked around you. Feeling like someone was staring holes in your back.

The second panic attack came when on a day you were working from home. A few weeks had passed and overall it started like a totally normal day, just a few calls. Not much work to do that day and around lunch time you still wore your pajamas. When you went into the kitchen to cook, you suddenly got a text message from an unknown number. First you thought it was someone from work. Though, the number didn’t seem familiar, so maybe it was a customer? However, none had your private number. You opened the message and instantly knew who sent that text.

–You should watch the news. Unfortunately I must tell you that Spencer didn't seem to be very grateful. Sorry to disappoint you sweetheart. –

You dropped your phone, heart pounding in your chest. ‘Sweetheart– Was that Cooper? So he did have your number… Why should you watch the news?’ Slowly you crept down, picking up your phone from the floor and almost dropping it again. Your hands trembled so much. 

After releasing a shuddering breath, you put your phone in your pocket and stepped towards your living room. One step at time, fearing you might fall if you walked too fast. Holding on to your sofa for dear life, you reached for the remote. 

Turning on the TV, unsure of what you would find, you switched programs until you found the news channel. Your hands still trembling, you took deep breaths trying to calm yourself.

‘Maybe you should sit down?’ – Letting yourself fall onto the sofa you turned up the volume. You saw a lot of police in the background then view switched to the reporter, who started speaking

“Yesterday in the early hours, two hikers found something horrible on their daily hiking trail. We waited for further information from the police and we can now announce that the Butcher has found yet another victim. This marks the 13th victim of the Butcher.”

Your knuckles around the remote turned white from anticipation, your fingernails digging in your own palm. ‘Maybe you should stop with the acrylic nails’ You held your breath. They showed a photo of a young man on the screen. It wasn’t someone you knew.

“The victim seems to be a young man named Spencer–” Spencer.. That was the name he told you that day. You didn’t even listen to the rest of the news. Completely blending everything out, thoughts racing in your head. A sob escaped you, your whole body shook uncontrollably. Gasping for air, crying, you had your second panic attack. It felt even stronger then the first one, but maybe it was only because you were more aware now. 

A part of you felt like you killed Spencer. You had thought he was just playing with your fear. It was your fault. ‘What have you done… you were right all along. Your sixth sense didn’t leave you. Why haven't you gone to the police? Were you an accomplice now? Why haven’t you told somebody? You could have saved him…’ The answer was simple. You hadn’t been 100% sure. Hell until now you thought you imagined most of his weird behavior, were overthinking it, writing it off as anxiety.

Helplessly you wandered around towards your kitchen in the search for a bag. When you finally found one, you sank down against your cupboard. Taking deep breaths with the plastic bag to calm your breathing. After calming down and just sitting silently in your kitchen for 20 minutes, you got up and shut down the TV.

‘You couldn’t go to the police, could you? What if they held you responsible for it because you didn’t say anything until now. You didn’t even know his last name or where he lived.’ 

A dry and humorless laugh escaped you. Putting your face in your hand, trying to come to terms with reality. Finally you pushed your hair back and grabbed your phone.

Pondering if you should write back? Try to get information from him and go to the police? Could you get burned even more? Thinking for another minute you decided against it. Panic and anxiety controlled your actions. Your course of action was going in the complete opposite direction. Simply deleting the message. Deleting the evidence, deleting a small part of your guilt– ‘out of sight out of mind’

You didn’t continue work that day, called in sick, went to bed and just stared aimlessly at the ceiling. Thinking about everything. About the concert, about every small detail you remembered. All the strange things you thought he did, but in the end you thought it was just your imagination. 

This was so fucked up, why were you still alive and not locked up in some basement? Why were you still alive? He knew that you knew. By sending you that text, it almost seemed like he wanted you to know. It hardly made any sense to you. After hours and hours of thinking and getting a headache from it, you fell asleep rather exhausted.

Not even a day after you even changed your number, telling your friends and mom another lie. The excuse, you got too many spam calls on it, seemed to be good enough. You were that anxious that you were one step away from moving back into your mom's house. However you didn't want to exaggerate.

Everything you did, to feel secure didn’t help. The anxiety remained. Whenever you went outside you felt like a scared mouse, always looking around, getting in your car and inside the office building as quickly as possible. At first you looked for a black van, then you remembered that stupid little you had the great idea to reveal to him what the profiler said. Of course he was not driving that van anymore. Perhaps now he drove around in a girly pink car.

‘How could you have been so stupid?’, you wanted to bang your head against the table. You even judged Lady Raven for her naivety and here you were telling the Butcher what car to not drive. What to look out for. You helped him even further, by not going to the police. He must have been laughing at you in his head. What a fucking joke. He also must have realized what effect he had on you, using that for his advantage. That for one you found him attractive, on the other hand you were intimidated by him. You were glad you were still alive, but it also made you nervous.

A month later and nothing new from the Butcher and no strange occurrences you finally started to relax again. Cooper and all that happened was slowly being pushed to the back of your head. 

Furthermore, you moved out of your apartment. You felt spooked and unsafe in it. Living near your mom again gave you a small aspect of security back. Fortunately your workplace had a second office 20 min from your mom's apartment. You rented some transporter and with the help of your friends you moved your stuff into your new apartment within a day. Moving out helped your anxiety a lot.

Another month later, you started to go out with your friends again, didn’t look around every time you left your apartment and became more yourself. Feeling confident. You were slowly going after your hobbies again. Running outside, Swimming, visiting your favorite coffee shop or reading in the park on a good day. All without turning around every few seconds. 

Before you knew it about half a year had passed and it all was a mere memory. You hadn’t had another panic attack in months. Your job was great, you met your friends a lot, also visited your mom every week and you could even listen to music with noise canceling headphones again. It felt normal. Back to how it was before. There was no news from the Butcher. No new Butcher victims, just some mom in a horrible car crash, but aside from that there was just the usual news. 

It was around January, a Saturday, your birthday to be exact, where it began to get strange again. Even though it started out as every other birthday since you were 21. First brunch with your mum, having some good quality time in your favorite restaurant. After that, you went home again and around the evening your friends should arrive to go out. You should be around 10 people later. Normally you would just celebrate at home, but your best friend Simon wanted to party. Who were you to deny his wishes?

You had been Besties for ages, growing up with the same situation of a cheating parent, pushed you even closer together. It was only after high school where you went in different directions. Simon wanted to study, whereas you started working. There he met his better half Sebastian, they’ve been together ever since and when the three of you did something together they treated you like their child. Which you found hilarious. You loved them.

So a couple of friends were coming over and around midnight you would go dancing. When you arrived back at your apartment you noticed something strange. There was a small gift in front of your door. You looked around if you saw any of your neighbors before picking it up and unlocking your door. 

It didn’t seem to have a name anywhere. ’Strange. Maybe it was from that elderly woman on the first floor?’, you wondered. You put it on your kitchen counter, saving it for later. Seeing as you had only a couple of hours left to clean and dress up. Also you needed your makeup done before simon came, or he would go way overboard with his ideas. You already agreed to let him do your hair and change your outfit, if it was “too boring”. 

That was another reason he wanted you to go out. Maybe you would finally find prince charming and you could go on cute double dates.  In his opinion, your ‘no dating’ phase had been going on too long. Looking at yourself in the mirror you felt good. You decided to go with some short black pants, and a glittery black top with an open back. 

By the time the others arrived you totally forgot about the present still laying wrapped on the kitchen counter. Friend after friend arrived, all of them overly punctual. Except for two individuals, as always. You didn’t mind, it was only Lucas, a friend of Sebastian, with his girlfriend Mary. You didn’t particularly like her, Mary needed to be in the spotlight, sometimes you felt like she tried to replace you in your friend group. None of the others saw this most of the time though. She was ‘little miss perfect’. Well, except for Simon and Lizzy, they did see her other side sometimes.  

Putting on some music after everybody sat down in the living room, you went back to the kitchen to help Simon with the last drinks. As Simon was putting away the cake he brought on the kitchen counter he saw the small present laying around. “Who is this from?”

You walked towards him to see what he ment. “Oh, I actually don’t know. I think one of my neighbors left it for me.” shrugging you picked it up.

“Do you know what's inside?”, You shook your head, now you’ve done it. Simon loved a good mystery, something to solve, something thrilling.

“Well then, open it! I’ll get the rest of the drinks.”, he ushered you towards the living room where the others sat around your coffee table. Climbing over the back rest of your couch, you made yourself comfortable in the corner. Simon brought your drinks while you started to open the present. “What is it?”

“It’s…” you frowned. Pulling out a simple small teddy bear, with something silver on top. It was made out of plastic, nothing overly special. It was a Keychain.

“I think that’s something I could put on my keychain? Wait there's more…” There was something shiny at the bottom of the present. 

“A bracelet– Oh, it’s really pretty.” You held it towards the light, it sparkled brightly. It was a simple silver bracelet, with a little charm in the center. A cute colorful flower. 

“Aww how cute. But it seems like it was more for a child? Are you sure your neighbors know your age?” Lizzy laughed and poked you. She was what you would consider your girl bestfriend.

“Or maybe they know that you still have stuffed animals in your bed”,joked Simon and threw a pillow at him. “Hey, be careful, my drink!”, he exclaimed with a feigned outrage. You flipped him off. It wasn’t your fault that you could only go to sleep, while holding something in your arm.

“Don’t pout, come I’ll put the bracelet on. Then we get you a tiara and you’ll be a Disney princess.”Lizzy grabbed the bracelet of your hand and put it on you.

“And put the keychain thing to your keychain–”, Marcus said as they all laughed at your embarrassment. You gave them a look. 

“Really guys, do I have to?”, you whined. 

“Yes, give it to me, I’ll do it. You open the rest of our presents. I promise you’ll like them”, winked Simon and held out his hand. Reluctantly you gave him the key chain and started to open the other presents.

The other presents were way better. You got some games, wine and everybody plus your mom pitched in to buy you a new bike. They hid it in front of your door before. You had tears in your eyes as you thanked each of them. ‘You had the best friends’ 

After eating the cake there was nothing to stop you guys from going all out. Drinking games, Beer pong, dancing or just talking. Later on, Lucas and his girlfriend arrived around 10. At this point everybody was in a good mood and slightly drunk. On seeing the bike, Mary was offended that they hadn’t waited for them to give me my present. 

You were about to tell her that it was your birthday, when some of the others already apologized to her. Telling her they didn’t know when they would show up.Annoyed, you refilled your drink, and went back to the friends playing beer pong. You needed to get drunk more to be nice to her. She wasn’t even here for 5 minutes and everything had to resolve around her.

The party got louder and better, all having a good time. Half an hour before you wanted to leave Mary came to you while dancing, grabbing your arm. “Is that the bracelet you got from your neighbor? The others told me about it. It's so cute. Can I try it on? I always wanted something like this…”, Mary asked you with her stupid baby voice. She immediately tried grabbing it off your arm.

“Ehm, hey wait a second. Here, but I want back before we go.”, You didn’t want any drama today. She nodded her head, waved you off and reassured you that you would get it back in a second.

You did, in fact, not get it back within a second and when you were standing in the queue to the club, you realized that she still had it on. Now it was too late.

Inside the club your friends surprised you, they booked a small area to sit with a table in the middle. Some drinks and bottles, waiting for you in the middle. 

“Guys! You shouldn’t have!”, you exclaimed happily. 

“Only the best for you Birthday girl!” Simon cheered! Hugging you tightly. Celebrating your birthday never felt better. You did a few shots and then most of you went off dancing to the dancefloor for the next hour.

Coming back from the dance floor you sat back down exhausted. Every time you went out you asked yourself the same question. ‘Why did you even decide to wear heels today?’ All of you started to get new drinks and someone suggested to spice things up and play an old fashioned “Truth or Dare”. Without truth of course, because it was way too loud.

You loved these games, it was always fun to watch. Though you didn’t like doing dares yourself, always feeling a bit shy and easily embarrassed. Now with the alcohol you did feel more comfortable. Maybe you would be up to do a dare. As if reading your thoughts Simon yelled at you over the table “Y/N”. 

You looked at him with pleading eyes, your confidence dwindling. “Noo.. Please…”

“No! I’ve waited enough. I dare you to go out there and make out with a stranger!” he exclaimed, pointing to the dance floor. Some of your friends whistled at that. 

Not waiting for you to think about it Simon stood up. “Do you trust me? We go dancing and I promise I won’t let some creep near you. Only handsome guys?” He held out his hand. You thought about it. If not now, when would you ever do it? You needed to get over your own shadow. Quickly you emptied your glass. For the extra bit of confidence.

“Pinky promise?” you asked, feeling bold suddenly and holding out your pinky. He looked surprised and instantly linked your pinky with his. “Promisee.” happily he dragged you to the dance floor. 

“What's your age range? Still someone around your age?” Simon asked, wiggling his eyebrows. 

You rolled your eyes at his behavior. “I don’t know. He can be older… but not above 50!!” Simon pretended to be shocked at your revelation, holding his hand above his heart. 

“Older men! How scandalous!”, you jabbed his side. 

“Let's go before I change my mind.”, you threatened. As you made your way on the dance floor they started to play one of your favorite songs ‘Unholy’.

“As information, I’m going back as soon as I see you enjoy yourself. I’m not watching a full make out session from you.”, he shouted in your ear. Laughing, you nodded. Fair enough, you wouldn’t want to watch him make out with Sebastian either. Both of you started dancing to the music, stealing glances at the people around you. 

More like Simon was looking around, whereas you tried not to think about the dare too much. 

You felt the people dancing all around you. Swinging your hips and moving your arms around your body, you felt yourself getting lost in the music. 

Simon and you danced yourself further into the crowd. Someone bumped against your ass, touching it. Before you could even react somebody else pushed that person away. It was not Simon, seeing as he was still dancing right before you. He raised a brow gesturing behind you. Mouthing the simple word ‘Hot’.

While dancing you turned your head slightly to look behind. You couldn’t see much, all the flickering colorful lights made it hard to recognize anything. He was tall, broad shoulders and his hair seemed to be a bit longer. You continued dancing, Simon nodding at you. ‘Fuck it. Simon better not be wrong’ You trusted his judgment. In the rhythm of the music, you danced backwards until you found yourself practically grinding your ass on him. He didn't move away, dancing in sync with you.

One of his hands placed itself on your hip, pulling you even more against him. You felt a sudden rush of confidence, as you continued swaying your ass against him and felt something hardened in his pants. It felt huge. 

Using this confidence boost and as a confirmation you spun around, still dancing. ‘Could you do it?’ Looking up at his face, sadly, the flashing lights still barely illuminated his face. Looking closer you could make out a few facial features. He also had a slight beard. Even without knowing his exact looks, you felt a certain pull towards him. ‘I bet he is handsome’ You were not one to make the first move, but you were going to fulfill your dare. 

‘You could do it. You looked fucking hot  and you wouldn't see him ever again.’ Dancing against him, his slight erection pressing against you, you took the initiative, steadying yourself with one hand at his shirt. 'Why wouldn’t he take the first step? Why did the women need to take control in this situation?' Until now you were always the more experienced partner, so it was nothing new for you. Even though you would like some change. Him taking control, getting rough or just doing what he wants… Maybe you read too many dark romance books.

Slowly wandering with the other hand up his chest, resting it at his neck. Slightly you pulled his head towards you to push your lips onto him. His lips were rough. At first it was just you moving your mouth against his. You felt him putting away his drink on the high table next to you. 

As he still did not reciprocate the kiss and for a second you thought that you read the signs wrong. At least you fulfilled your dare. However as soon as you broke the kiss and stepped back, he roughly grabbed your face, pulling you back into him. Surprised by the sudden force of his grip, a small yelp escaped you, before he silenced it with a kiss. The action instantly sent a warm fuzzy feeling down to your core. 

Kissing you hard, your mouths moved in sync. His large hand on the side of your face kept your head in place. You winced slightly when he bit your lip, but he hardly seemed to notice. He tried to slip his tongue between your lips, but you denied it. 

Trying to gain control of the kiss and situation. You heard a low grumble from him, he seemed discontented with your attitude. You smirked against his lips, which seemed to annoy him further. Moving his hands down your body, he grabbed your ass, hard. The pain going straight into your core, making you moan into his mouth. He seized the opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth. 

This time you didn’t even try to get the upper hand, you liked that he was in control. Finally someone who was more dominant in these things. Giving you the time to explore this new, more submissive side. Letting go of your face he moved his hand down your body. Over your chest, stomach and finally resting at your hips, pulling you against him. Goosebumps traveled all over your body, where his hands touched you. Your brain felt dazed, this was the hottest makeout session you ever had. You didn’t care about his roughness or the biting, you rather liked it.

When he broke the kiss you were both panting heavily. Slowly, almost teasing, he traced his fingers up your spine before grabbing you by your hair and tilting your head upwards to look at him. Your mouth parted slightly, a small moan escaped your lips. It stung where he had his grip on your hair, but the slight pain turned you on even more. Sure you knew you liked reading about these kinds of things, but experiencing them made you feel even more aroused.  

For a split second, you thought you saw his panting expression change into a smirk. Before you could think twice, he kissed you again. Your mind instantly went blank, his kiss was like a drug. This kiss was slower, still rough but he set the tone. Moving his lips against yours, pushing his hand between your legs. You felt hot, everything felt way too hot to bear, never had you been kissed with such passion. You needed to be closer to him. You tried running your hands down his body. 

He removed his hands in an instant, grabbing yours and pushing them back to your sides. You let out a small whine. ‘What was going on with you? You never whined. You felt like a schoolgirl, making out for the first time’ Shaking his head disapprovingly, he turned away to grab his drink. Taking a sip, he held it near your lips, offering it to you. “It’s just water.”

You knew you shouldn’t drink from strangers, though you were way too drunk to think straight or even logically. ‘You wanted to keep making out and if that helped?’ Looking up at him you tilted your head forward against the glass and emptied the whole glass. You didn’t even realize how thirsty you were, and a glass of water seemed like a good option.

“Good girl.”, you heard his deep voice beside your ear. The loud music was making it hard to hear him clearly. The praise went straight to your core. He put his drink away and you began dancing to the music. More like grinding on each other. 

He still didn’t allow you to touch him much and you wanted nothing more than to travel your hands up and down on his body, or under his shirt. He leaned down, grabbing your hips to press you against him. Pressing his hard crotch against your lower stomach, making you inhale a sharp breath.  

“Can I get your number?” his deep voice mumbled against your ear. You pondered. It felt like he was growling. Slowly he began caressing your ear, gently kissing his way to your neck, making you close your eyes, leaning your head back to give him better access. Your legs were feeling weak. Running his thumb along your jawline, he sucked and bit in your neck, as he kissed his way back to your ear. 

“Please?” his voice was a low growl against your ear. Your eyes fluttered open again as you nodded, desire filled your body. You would do anything, if he kept going on like this. 

He kissed you softly this time and you bit his lip as he tried ending the kiss. You wanted to kiss him longer. You missed his warmth already, and also missed the dark look flashing up in his eyes. He pulled his phone out, tipping something before handing it to you. As you grabbed his phone, you felt yourself wobble to the side. Luckily he grabbed you in time and stadied you against his body. Now your back was pressed against his front.

You thought about grinding your butt against him, but as if sensing your thoughts he nudged you towards his phone. Looking at the screen, it was truly hard to concentrate for you. He kept sidetracking you by placing soft kisses on your neck.

Blinking rapidly you slowly made out the numbers. Your vision seemed a bit blurry, your eyes feeling so heavy. ‘You didn’t even drink that much’ After what felt like hours you successfully put in your number. As soon as you were done, he grabbed his phone back.

You were so drunk that you didn’t notice the contact already had a name. - Sweetheart - Turning back to him you nearly lost your balance, falling against his chest. His arm wrapped around your side, steadying you as he began walking you through the crowd of dancing people. You found it so difficult to keep your balance, you felt funny. You couldn’t seem to focus, everything stayed a bit blurred. You didn’t even know where he took you. Was he taking you home?

“Hey, sorry to bother you guys.”, he loudly said to someone over the music as he came to a stop. You leaned your face against his shoulder. You were really tired.

“You are her friends, right? I think someone put something in her drink, one minute she was fine and the next she could barely stand.” Your brows furrowed, ‘drugged? You were fine… when should that have happened? Didn’t those drugs work way quicker?’ Shocked gasps filled the air. 

“I thought I would bring her back to you, so you can get her home.” He had such a calming and sympathetic voice. ‘Why would he bring you back? You were having fun.’ You playfully bit him in his chest, making him tighten his grip on your hip. His lips pressed in a firm line.

“Yes, yes she is our friend. Oh fuck. Thank you so much man!” Four hands grabbed you off the stranger you were leaning onto. You pouted.

“No-o I don’t wa- want to”, your voice slurred, you sounded like a brat. Struggling against their grip, not wanting to leave his side, but they were stronger than you. Also your fight wasn't really that much of a fight as you thought, you could hardly stand straight. You didn’t even knew his name. His jaw clenched as he looked towards you and the two holding you, his eyes lingered on the arm of the girl.

“Yes yes, hopefully you got his number.”, said a high pitched female voice near your ear. It sounded like Mary. You looked around, it was Lucas and Mary who supported you. ‘Why those two?’

 “Why didn’t you tell me you liked older men?” Giggling, you shrugged your shoulders.

“He is so fine, maybe I should talk to him too.” Mary whispered in your ear. ‘What about her boyfriend?’

“Well, thanks again man, I’m Simon, her best friend. We’re taking her home asap, before something happens…” he began, as Lucas and Mary led you away. He gestured for them to stop, but they didn’t look back. Thus you couldn’t hear the rest of the conversation play out. It was a good thing. Drugged or not, your subconsciousness would have freaked out sooner or later.

“No problem Simon. It is what everybody would have done. Call me Cooper.”, he held his hand out for him to shake, which Simon gladly accepted.

“Nah, I don’t think so. Some sick fuck, may have taken advantage of her in a state like that. So thank you Cooper.. Shit, I just wanted her to have a good time on her birthday.”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself Simon. I was glad I could help. Wish her a happy birthday from me, I hope she feels better in the morning.” Simon nodded, turning around to talk with the others and Cooper soon vanished in the crowd. Slowly your friends started to follow the three of you back to the entrance of the club. 

“Hey, Y/N you stay here and wait. Lucas and I get the jackets. Just hold onto the handrail of the stairs or sit down. You can stand on your own for a bit, can’t you? ”she asked, concerned and something different in her voice. You gave her a thumbs up before holding onto the railing again. 

“We will hurry as best as we can, the others should be here soon.” She came closer, whispering in your ear. 

“Also you can stop your show now. Yes it’s your birthday, but do you need that much attention?”, with that she and lucas made her way to the coat check waiting line. 

You let your head fall back as you take deep breaths. ‘Show? What show?’ Deeply breathing in the fresh air that was coming from the entrance. Few people were walking past you either coming in or leaving the club. Still it was hard concentrating on anything, but you were doing okay.

Until you weren’t. All of a sudden you felt something against your back and in the next moment you lost your footing and along with the grip on the handrail and flew down the stairs. Instinctively your body tried not to hit the ground face first. For that you turned around to face the top of the stairs. ‘Was there a man?’ you thought. Blinking once whoever you thought you saw was gone, just panicked bystanders. Did you hear Simon?

Your side painfully crashed first into the stairs, then continuing falling further down the stairs. You tried your best to stop or push yourself up, but failed. Someone behind you grabbed your arm to stop you. The only thing it brought you was, that you landed on your foot, with your butt while also twisting it in a painful way. 

(A/N: You know, I thought about it, Leaving you hanging right here. However a)  I should not end all my chapters the same, you could get bored and b) I’m not evil.)

Pain shot up from your foot, as your tears began to form in your eyes. “Fuck, Y/N.” Simon and Sebastian seemed next to you in mere seconds. Carefully they lifted you off the ground and gently removed your foot from under you. It hurt like hell.

“Is she alright?”, one of the bouncers came towards you from the entrance, having heard the commotion. 

“Hey, can you move your foot?” Simon asked. You gave it a try, whining instantly. Crying even more you shook your head, your brain was way too foggy to come up with a smart ass reply. 

“Where were you?” yelled an otherwise rather quiet Simon. 

“Getting our jackets...” began Mary.

“She was drugged and you left her alone? Are you serious Mary?” Lizzy yelled too, her face enraged.

“How do we know she really was drugged? Maybe she just played it to get away from that man?” Mary suggested in an annoyed tone. 

“What the fuck? Did you look at her? Does she seem like a normal drunk to you? You have seen her drunk before, but never like this!”, came Lizzy's angry reply.

“Also from what I saw in the beginning, she sucked his fucking face off! Didn’t seem like she hated it.” Simon countered. 

“Why did you even leave her alone in the first place? None of this would have happened! Lucas you have no brain of your own anymore?”, Sebastian joined their yelling. The statement made Lucas' face turn the darkest shade of red. 

“Fucking pathetic. Lets get her to the emergency room, someone order an uber?”Simon turned around angrily, and he and Lizzy helped you up. Each of them supported you as you hobbled down towards the streets. The way from the Club to the ER was gone in a blur. You couldn’t remember most of it. One minute you were leaving the club and in the next you laid on a bed in the ER. ‘How did you get here?’

You looked around for your friends, but the room was empty besides Simon who was sitting next to your bed with a worried expression. Your head felt clearer, you cleared your throat.

“So what did the doctor say, Simon? What's the damage?”, better get it over with.

“Well.. bad news first. You have a bruised foot and a hyperextended ligament. As a consequence you have to wear a bandage and walk on crutches for the next month at least.”

You sighed. It seemed like he wasn’t even finished with the bad news yet.  

“You also got a few bruises on your arms, legs and back. Buut the Good news– they've given you something to counteract the effects of the drugs, but you'll probably still have to sleep it off, to fully feel better.”

“Better?” you laughed “I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Anything is better than this..”

“I know..” he said as he patted your head. “Listen, they want to keep you here overnight, but just call me in the morning and we will pick you up and drive you home, ok?”

Defeated, you nodded, he squeezed your hand and left soon after. Leaving you alone in the empty room. The rest of the night was uneventful. The nurses checking up on you from time to time, bringing you more water. Sadly they also woke you up at 6 to check your vitals again and give you painkillers. After one final talk with the doctor, getting instructions from him for the next weeks and your crutches, you were ready to go home. 

As promised Simon picked you up, he even cleaned your apartment from you and forbade you from helping. He was too kind. He even made Sebastian shop some groceries for you, which he brought over. So you didn’t need to stress about that for the next couple of days. About two hours later they left, telling you to call if you needed something. 

You never had a wild birthday like that before, but somehow trouble seemed to find you. It was just a small consolation that nothing had happened to you the last months.

Still exhausted, you laid back on the couch, still in your yesterday's outfit. Closing your eyes as you enjoyed the silence. The ping of your phone ringing loud through the quietness of your apartment. You grabbed your phone and held it above your face. It was from Simon, he left not even a minute ago. Did he forget something? You opened your Phone.

– I totally forgot to tell you something. I meant to wish you a happy birthday from the man from the club last night. He also wished for you to get well soon. –

A second message followed.

– You remember? The one you made out with? He said his name was Cooper. –

Cooper…You knew that name. There was only one person that came to your mind with that exact name. Alarm Bells were going off in your head, but whatever they gave you in the hospital was working. You weren’t shaking or panicking, you were rather calm, what confused you. 

That couldn’t be true, no. Surely you would have recognized him, even in the dim light of the club. It wasn’t that dark, was it? You rested your phone on your chest and began thinking about last night. Trying to remember, you realized that reconstructing the evening would be way harder than you thought. There were a lot of gaps in your memories and many were quite foggy. Perhaps it was because of the drugs mixed in your drink.

Sighing you closed your eyes, attempting to recollect what the stranger looked like. He was tall, had a small beard, you didn’t remember his eye or hair color, but his hair was a bit longer? You were unsure. You remembered his large hands on your body, holding your head in place while kissing you. He was strong for sure. 

‘Think straight!’ you warned yourself, already starting to feel hot again. Just thinking about it still turned you on. ‘If that was Cooper, the man from that concert. You were fucked.’ 

You tried to arrange your thoughts. Yes, you made out with him, a serial killer, and you liked it, you felt disgusted. ‘You didn’t know it was him. Why would he even be there? The possibility was close to zero’ Suddenly you remembered something. 

Didn’t you drink from his drink? Of course you were drunk before, but after that everything went downhill. Recalling how super drunk and tired you felt soon afterwards. It would all make sense.

Except… Why did he bring you back to your friends then? Perhaps it was a weird coincidence? 

Maybe you should ask Simon if his name was really Cooper. Maybe he misunderstood? That looked like a good option. Opening your phone, you started to answer Simon as a new message came in. 

It was from an unknown number. A simple: – Happy Birthday Sweetheart. –

It couldn’t be, you changed your number. Not many people called you that and you faintly remember Cooper calling you like that. Before you could wonder about it more, a second message from the same number appeared. What you read then made your heart freeze in fear, your pulse increased and hands started shaking, which made reading the message harder.

– You know, you were always nervous and so easily startled, like a cute little doe. Constantly on alert and looking around, to run away, at the slightest noise. Though if there were a little accident to happen. Where will you go now little doe, if you can’t even run? –

(A/N: nvm i am evil)

[screamforyani]

make you proud

pairing ↠ gf!ethan x (f) reader

genre .. warnings ↠ angst, smut, macher!reader, mc has a panic attack, violence/character death, logically mc would be around sam’s age but we’re gonna ignore logic for the sake of you being a fresh college student

summary ↠ after your boss is killed in a ghostface attack and your deepest, darkest secret gets out, your life is flipped upside-down. the whole world knows that you’re stu macher’s illegitimate daughter now and the worst part is that even your friends suspect you might be a killer.

wc ↠ 9.0k

for whatever reason, you were indescribably antsy today. 

for all of three fleeting minutes, you convinced yourself that nothing was amiss and chalked it up to being excessively paranoid, which sounded like you. but you couldn’t shake the feeling that something just wasn’t right. 

meandering down the pavement of blackmore’s perfectly trimmed courtyard, your worries were later rationalized when some random guy walking just shy of you with his friend randomly exclaimed for all the campus to hear, “yo, dude, look out - it’s that killer!”

you were baffled, but they didn’t give you much room for a reaction before a flock of students crowded you, several of them taking out their phones. one girl dangled her phone in your face and asked, “what’s it like being a psycho bitch?”

you barked, “what the fuck are you talking about?”

“uh, oh. better run before she fucks around and stabs one of us,” suggested her friend, just before the two of them laughed and darted away from you like you were dangerous.

“what the fuck?” you mumbled under your breath, more than a little perplexed. 

the crowd around you was beginning to build up and that (much to your dismay), combined by the number of phones filming your every move, was making you incredibly anxious.

“thanks, i think we’ve got it from here,” announced a familiar voice from behind you, and before you knew it, someone was pulling you away from the crowd of people.

when you turned your head, you realized that it was no other than chad. 

mindy was right beside him and immediately groaned, “god, we’ve been looking for you everywhere.”

“looking for me for what?” you asked, having not a clue as to what was happening, but you did have a really bad feeling about whatever it was. “what’s going on?”

mindy gave you a look. “haven’t you seen the news?”

you hissed, “does it look like i watch the news?”

“well, maybe now would be a great time to start,” mindy retorted, grabbing your other arm as she escorted you away with her brother as if you were a wanted criminal.

“i still don’t know what the fuck is going on.”

“we’ll tell you when we get to sam and tara’s,” chad said, feigning some semblance of calm.

the ride to sam and tara’s was nothing short of suffocating and nerve-racking. when their tall, gaunt apartment finally came into view and chad and mindy briskly escorted you upstairs, everyone stood to flat feet, hairs raised, looking at you with total dread and consternation. sam and tara were obviously there, alongside their roommate, quinn, mindy’s girlfriend, anika, and your friend, ethan, who also happened to be chad’s roommate.

tara was the first to speak before you could demand an explanation and exclaimed, “when were you going to tell us that you’re stu’s daughter?”

your heart dropped, but you tried to play dumb, glancing around and laughing nervously. “what?”

chad pointed to the television while mindy grabbed the remote control and turned it up for you to hear. there was a photo of your and sam’s shared boss on the screen, the headlines reporting that he had been found murdered at your job in the late, dead hours of last night.

the newscaster reported, “a pair of ghostface costumes were found at the scene, a character popularized by the stab movie franchise. also found at the scene were the driver’s license of sam carpenter, who you may remember from the tragic ghostface incident last year in woodsboro, and the birth certificate of…,” she said your name. “which reveals her father to be no other than stu macher.”

the rest of her words went in one ear and out the other as you were filled with immediate dread and panic. your heart started to feel taut in your chest as everything else around you became white noise and your grip on the reins of reality began to slacken.

“is she okay?”

“no, fuckward, does she look okay?”

“she’s having a panic attack,” ethan said worriedly, having - unlike the others - been here before. he swiftly came to your side and held you, looking into your eyes as he reassured gently, “hey, look at me. remember to breathe. everything will be okay.”

you nodded your head, but you felt as if you were going to die any second now. you tried to listen to ethan, soothed by his presence.

“okay, good. i’m going to take you to the couch now so that you can sit down,” ethan said slowly. “is that okay?”

“yes,” you whispered, chest heaving.

ethan slowly walked you to the couch and asked tara to get you a glass of water. he tried to offer you a pillow to hold but you denied it, reaching for his hand instead.

he gave you a saccharine smile and squeezed your hand, “i’m right here with you, okay? we’re at sam and tara’s apartment and it’s just the eight of us. nothing is going to happen to you, i promise. just remember to breathe.”

just as you nodded your head, tara came back with a glass of water that you accepted with a quiet thanks and sipped from. ethan let go of your shaky hand, which made you panic for a moment, but he patted your back and assured you that he wasn’t going anywhere, encouraging you to drink with both hands while the others asked how they could help.

after a solid five more minutes, you’d essentially calmed down from your attack, but you felt completely drained. not to mention terrified beyond belief. everyone gave you some reassuring words out of the kindness of their hearts, but it wasn’t enough.

anika gave you a compassionate smile. “do you have panic attacks often?”

“no, not really. sporadically. the last time was maybe eight months ago, and ethan was there, so he, uh, knows what to do now,” you explained softly, somewhat awkward. having panic attacks in front of groups of people was never exactly fun.

sam crouched down in front of you. “you’re stu macher’s daughter.”

“and you’re the daughter of billy loomis,” you replied blankly.

for a second, you and sam just stared at each other, eyes filled mutual understanding. cursed recognized cursed.

chad asked, “did you know?”

“of course, i knew,” you grumbled, crossing your arms. “i’ve always known. i was trying to make sure nobody else knew.”

“well, now the whole world knows, and someone is trying to pin our boss’ murder on us. people are saying that we’re working as a team to continue the legacy of our fathers,” sam told you, which made the ordeal in the courtyard make a whole lot more sense, but not any easier to cope with.

quinn’s brows furrowed. “but how did they get your driver’s license and her birth certificate?”

“probably because of somebody with close access to them,” mindy suggested, panning her view cynically over to quinn. “like you.”

quinn made a face. “okay, but she-” quinn gestured to you with her shoulder. “-lives alone. i steal that too?”

mindy shrugged. “i don’t know. maybe you have a partner. someone who’s always at her place, like, i don’t know, ethan.”

“i come over to help her study,” ethan explained, eyes widening at the accusation. 

“right,” mindy drawled. “and where are you when she goes to the bathroom - or steps out the room?”

“mindy, i didn’t even know where my own birth certificate was before all of this,” you said, massaging your temple. “i’m sure i would know if he was rammaging the place if i stepped away for three minutes.”

sam interjected, running a hand through her raven-black hair, “you guys, this isn’t helping. i say go home, travel in groups, and we regroup later.”

sam’s word was more or less final, so the five of you obediently did as told. ethan told you that he’d see you tomorrow night for studying which made mindy roll her eyes and tug you along with her and anika. fortunately enough, you and anika lived in the same apartment complex, so mindy would walk with you two and spend the night with her girlfriend.

you made it back inside without any ghostface attacks. locking your door behind you, you heaved a breath and went to take a shower. 

steaming, hot water beated down your body, covering your skin in little rivulets while the mist rose like shrouds above your head. all you could think about was how the secret you’d dedicated your whole life to protecting had finally slipped. what happens in the dark always comess to light, they said.

it was overwhelming. you had the blood of stu macher flowing through you, a man who took many lives before yours, and now you were being accused of continuing his wicked legacy. which meant that not only would nobody ever look at you the same again, but there was an actual killer out there that had gotten close enough to you to steal your birth certificate.

deep down inside, you knew that it was one of those seven.

the following night, ethan sent you a text informing you that he couldn’t make it and apologized, softening the message with a cute emoji. 

you thought nothing of it and typed back, okay, all 296 of my highlighters will still be here whenever you’re ready. yes, i counted. i demand you return the other four you stole.

yes, ma’am, replied ethan a couple minutes later with a salute emoji that made you giggle.

seriously, though. be safe, you typed. 

your phone buzzed in your hand just as you prepared to set it down. i will, but don’t worry about me. i’ll take care of both of us.

you hearted his text and told him goodnight, all while wearing the stupidest smile on your face.

which was erased the next morning when your tv was playing (given the circumstances, you took mindy’s advice and started watching the news) and something in you fractured when you saw something about a ghostface attack at sam and tara’s apartment. you swiped up your keys and scurried to your car, making a beeline for their apartment complex.

you slipped through yellow tape, spotting some of the gang and asking, “what the hell happened?”

“back. the fuck. up,” mindy snarled, looking at you like you were a deformed beast. 

“what?” you whispered, confused. you glanced at chad and tara. “i just heard the news. i came right away. i wanted to make sure you guys were okay.”

“well, look at us. we’re fine. there, you can go,” mindy retorted with disdain. 

just as you were about to speak, ethan came from behind the yellow tape, calling, “chad.” 

that was when chad left his post at and paraded toward ethan with long, quick strides and slammed him into an emergency vehicle, shouting, “where the fuck were you?”

ethan’s eyes widened. “what - when?”

“don’t play dumb with me, man. you disappear and my sister almost gets killed!”

“he was with me!” you shouted, coming up to them and trying to pry chad off of ethan. “okay? we had to study, remember?”

chad’s grasp on ethan slackened as he glanced at you, but he didn’t let go. “and he was with you the whole night?”

“yes,” you lied through your teeth. 

chad pressed, “then why didn’t you show up together? did he leave?”

“we did show up together. i told him to stay in the car,” you said, glaring at ethan to really sell your tale. “see what happens when you don’t follow instructions?”

ethan faltered, glancing towards the ground. “i’m sorry.” 

chad released him, backing away. “fuck, man.”

ethan glanced into the alleyway, wincing. “oh my god - who?”

“anika,” chad exhaled, walking back towards the ambulance. “and quinn.”

something violent twisted in your chest.

you watched ethan go up to mindy and heard her say something about the both of you being at the top of her list, but it was all white noise to you. your heart was taut with guilt, given that you had lied for ethan in spite of having no clue of his whereabouts when you two were meant to be studying. 

there was a reason you did it, though - logical or not. you just genuinely didn’t believe your best friend was a murderer. you’d known him for a year, six months before the core four came to manhattan. regardless of wherever he was, you doubted it was on a murder spree, and you covered for him solely because you didn’t want him to have to go through being interrogated.

merely minutes later, sam and tara came back with gale and kirby and all of you ended up in some place down an alley that apparently belonged to some kids in mindy’s film studies class.

“it’s a theater,” tara said when the lights flickered on after you all got through the intricate security. 

“not just a theater,” gale said. “it’s a shrine.”

that was when you noticed the rest of the room and the screen lifted up, revealing nine different mannequins in ghostface costumes.

the eight of you ventured around the room, walking around in awe. everyone gravitated towards something different - kirby to charlie walker’s knife, gale to drawings of dewey, mindy and chad to randy meek’s shirt, and sam to billy loomis’ ghostface case.

likewise, you were beside a mannequin that sported your father’s infamous red robe.

“they’ve got the whole goddamn franchise,” mindy marveled. 

“how’d they get this stuff?” asked tara. “i mean, isn’t this evidence?”

“well, cops like money, and evidence can get lost pretty easily,” gale explained. “present company excluded, of course.”

ethan asked, “uh, why am i here exactly? my alibi checks out.”

“so i can keep an eye on you, roomie,” chad said, shooting ethan a smile. 

mindy made a V with her fingers and darted them between her eyes and ethan.

“the TV that killed stu macher,” kirby said to mindy, sitting beside her. 

your eyes locked on the infamous television. you’d obviously heard of it - there were many stories about your father’s death - but seeing it up-close was an entirely different experience and you didn’t know how to feel.

“hey,” ethan said.

you jolted out of your reverie, glancing to your side to spot ethan standing beside you. 

“sorry,” he whispered. “i wasn’t trying to scare you.”

“it’s fine,” you said, stepping away from your father’s robe. you were curious, but you didn’t want anyone getting the wrong vibe.

ethan whispered, “you didn’t have to lie for me earlier.”

“you really wanna talk about this now?”

“chad can watch me all he wants. they can’t hear us,” ethan said under his breath.

“listen,” you said softly, glancing at the glass case rather than making direct eye contact with him to avoid raising suspicion. “i only did what i did because you’re not a killer and i didn’t want you to go through an avoidable min-terogation.”

ethan’s lips twitched into a grin. “thank you.”

“we’re best friends,” you told him, in spite of the wrenching feeling of your heart at your own words. “you’d do the same thing for me, right?”

“i’d do anything for you. die for you.” kill for you, was what he really wanted to say, but he was playing it safe. “anything.”

it was ridiculous how much you wanted him and how much deeper you fell for him at those words.

but the lies didn’t stop there. and with more lies came more deluding yourself. ethan would make plans with you then sometimes drop them at the last minute, coincidentally all on the exact same nights your friends would get attacked. mindy, who’d you been getting closer with prior to the new ghostface killing spree, didn’t even want to talk to you anymore unless it was to accuse you of being a murderer.

which you couldn’t hold against her, but it made you sad. you were many things, but a killer wasn’t one of them. sam was practically the only one interested in having one-on-one conversations with you anymore.

“listen,” sam said, holding a cigarette. “i trust you. if nobody else understands you, i do.”

that meant something to you. “thanks.”

“but,” sam started, making you frown as your eyes locked on the buzzing city around you. there were cars speeding every which way, whipping by in a colorful blur. “i think you should keep your distance from ethan.”

your lips curled into a scowl. “you don’t trust him.”

sam said nothing, just letting out a sigh. 

“he’s been with me,” you lied, giving her a stern look. 

“i’m not saying that he hasn’t,” sam told you calmly, meeting your eyes. “i’m just saying it’s weird that every time the group has a near-death encounter with ghostface you two are coincidentally always together. that’s all.”

that was the same conclusion you’d reached a long time ago, but you didn’t want to believe that your best friend was a serial killer. much less that he would dare hurt your friends.

“i was in love before i met danny, you know. with richie,” sam spoke up after a lull of silence.

“yeah, the ghostface that was working with amber freeman, i know. you told me,” you reminded her, raising a brow. “why are you bringing that up?”

“because it’s no secret that you have feelings for ethan.”

your eyes flickered. “i’m not-”

“you are,” sam finished. “in love with him. but love is blind. if i didn’t have feelings for richie, i might’ve realized what was going on sooner, but i did. and i don’t want you to make that same mistake that almost cost me my sister.”

you sucked in a breath. hot tears pricked your eyes, threatening to cascade. you’d considered that you might have had feelings for ethan, but hearing it aloud really solidified things. you were out of your mind in love with your best friend who may or may not have been a killer, and that was why you covered his tracks without a second thought.

“please,” sam whispered, looking at you with desperation in your eyes. “if there’s anything you’re not telling us that could help, tell me. i understand.”

“ethan’s not a killer.”

“are you convincing me or yourself?”

“ethan’s not a killer,” you said with a little more vigor, but a lot less confidence. “i’ve known him since last year and i think i would know if my best friend had murderous tendencies.”

sam said your name, but with one glance at the clock you were already throwing on your coat and heading towards the front door. “i’ve got to go meet him,” you announced, turning on your heels for a second. “i’ll send you a pic or something to prove that he was there if that’s what you want.”

then you left. 

ethan was already inside your apartment when you got there, which wasn’t alarming because you’d given him a spare key a couple of months prior to this fiasco. likewise, you knew where he hid the spare to his and chad’s apartment.

“hey,” ethan said when he saw you enter the living room, glancing up from his phone. “i didn’t start the movie.”

“i see that,” you said, taking out your phone from your pocket. “do me a favor and look cute while i take a quick picture of you.”

ethan covered his face when he saw you pointing your phone at him. “what? you can’t do that - i’m camera shy!”

“oh, please,” you droned. “basically everyone thinks that you’re fucking ghostface and i wanted to have a picture of you ready to go just in case someone gets attacked. again.”

“to prove that i’m not ghostface?”

you mocked, “now you’re getting it!”

ethan rolled his eyes. then, he sobered, staring at you emptily. “what if i am ghostface?”

“what?” 

“i mean, what if mindy’s right - what if i’m… dangerous,” he said, rising to his feet. you were rooted in place when he crept towards you. “i’m always coincidentally missing during the attacks, and everyone thinks i’m with you, but we both know that that isn’t true.”

you could hear your heart thumping in your ears, getting louder with every step he took forward until he’d backed you into a wall, effectively caging you like an animal. “don’t you ever wonder where i am?”

you shook your head. 

“you’re such a liar. a very pretty liar,” ethan whispered, lips curling into a wicked grin. warmth spread through your chest. ethan thinks i’m pretty. “speaking of which - why do you lie for me? i mean, i don’t even have to ask.”

“because you’re not a killer and i want to save everyone time,” you told him, though your voice had completely lost all thunder and confidence.

ethan groaned, throwing his head back. “okay, this excuse was cute the first couple of times, but i’m bored now. i need you to come up with something else.”

“it’s the truth,” you whispered. 

“no, it’s not. and you wanna know what i think?” asked ethan, curling your hair around his finger. “i think it’s because you like me.”

your throat went dry and you shook your head. 

“no?” ethan asked, cocking his head to the side. “well, i have to admit that i like you. i know we’re just best friends and all, but… would it be so bad if we were more?”

there was a record scratch in your head. ethan liked you?

something switched in you. all rational thinking was officially off the table. you were now consumed by months-worth of pining that was rotting you from the inside out like a spoiled apple, and something made you raise on the tips of your toes, meeting your lips to ethan’s.

ethan was surprised for a split second at your boldness, then chuckled, trapping you in his arms. it was a reckless kiss, full of mutual longing and hair-pulling, and groaning. you tangled your fingers through his long, curly tresses while his found purchase at your hips, holding you tight as ever.

“i want you,” you rasped when your mouths finally parted, as if you were coming up for air at the pits of an ocean, swimming in each other’s love. “more than anything.”

“yeah?” 

“yeah,” you repeated, staring into his beautifully brown eyes. 

“fuck,” ethan said, locking lips with you again. almost like he couldn’t get enough. 

frankly, you couldn’t, either.

that was how you ended up with your back to the couch, ethan’s fingertips on your bare thighs as he held them apart, head buried between your legs. all you could feel was pleasure and the lingering drumming of your heartbeat, numb to the grief and despair that’d mantled over your friends for the past few weeks.

there was something about the view of your legs thrown over ethan, caught over his broad, naked shoulders, while he was on his knees sucking the soul out of you. you remembered how he gathered your thighs in his big hands and pulled you towards the edge, draping your legs over him.

“fuck, ethan,” you whimpered, slipping your fingers through his hair. “you sure you’ve never done this before?”

ethan silently nodded, making a humming sound that shook you. his tongue was giving its undivided attention to your clit, a pair of his fingers stuffed inside your cunt. he wasn’t exactly sure what he was doing, but from the way your features tensed with pleasure, it had to be something right.

you were driving him mad with lust and you were hardly even doing anything. the way you cried out his name with that sweet tongue of yours when his thumb rubbed your clit should have been a crime, to say nothing of how utterly tight you were around his fingers, squeezing around him with the wettest of sounds.

shit, he got you this wet? ethan - much like everybody else - knew you had a thing for him with how you defended him with your life, though this was desire of the next level. in a way, it was more than lust. it was burning. from the head down, judgment clouded by mantles of smoke, so to speak.

which explained everything on your end. the lying, the deception. you knew in your heart that there was almost nothing that you wouldn’t do for him, because you loved him.

“oh my fucking god,” you cried, sensitive. “ethan, baby, i’m so close.”

ethan was painfully hard right now, rutting his hips against the side of the couch at your pretty sounds. “you’re close?” he repeated, in spite of the signs glaring him in the face. your legs trembled like you were quaking, a pulse between them. 

you answered him in a moan, hands slipping out of his hair as you instead squeezed one of the couch pillows for dear life, afraid of hurting him.

“cum for me,” ethan said, lifting from your glistening pussy while substituting his mouth with his hands. “i wanna see you cum.”

looking at his eyes was all it took to shatter you. it was too quick for him to be finishing you, but he was. nice and hard.

it was like nothing you’d ever felt before, a kind of intensity you quickly understood only lived between each other. his name parted your open mouth in a scream-adjacent sound sure to do a number on the neighbors and your fingers found purchase in the pillow pressed to your bosom as your vision blurred white. ethan could feel you tightening around his long, thick fingers, and he so badly wished that it was his dick you were cumming on right now.

then, you went slack, not even realizing your back had arched off the sofa until it met the cushion again.

ethan, in awe at the sight of you orgasming, withdrew his fingers from your pussy with a squelch and said, “open.”

you opened your mouth without a second thought.

it took you by surprise when he shoved his fingers down your throat, but you sucked your own arousal off of them without a second thought - without having to be told. it was like you always just knew what he wanted. pleased, ethan hummed, “that’s it.”

you were back to earth for a second, slowly re-entering the real world as the lingering euphoric high of your orgasm gently faded. you took his fingers out of your mouth when you were done, smiling at the sight of him with your arousal giving his lips a wet glimmer. like you wanted to make him proud.

“you, woman,” ethan started, sucking in a breath. “are going to drive me crazy.”

you giggled, watching him come to a stand, though not without accidentally bumping your (thankfully empty) coffee table and sending it flat to its side. the two of you devolved into more giggles and ethan leaned over you to catch your lips in another kiss.

but as his lips started to travel lower, your giggles turned into soft sighs. you fumbled with his pants, somehow managing to take them off.

when his underwear came off too, you gaped at the sheer size of him. he was so big. matter of fact, that word didn’t do him justice.

ethan pushed your jaw up and teased, “you’ll catch flies.”

“oh, shut up,” you groaned lightheartedly. “jesus, you really walk around with that pussy-destroyer attached to you?”

ethan snorted at your choice of words. “can i destroy yours?”

you chortled, amused. “never say that again,” you whispered, grabbing the back of his head and drawing him into you. 

ethan smiled into your lips. i’ll take that as a yes.

so that was exactly what he did.

you thought about what happened that night a dozen times, deciding it was simultaneously the best and worst mistake of your life. on the one hand, you’d had amazing, mind-blowing orgasms thanks to ethan and he reciprocated your feelings. you thought he did, at least. you couldn’t really tell if it was genuine or just some kind of unnecessary bait to get you to sleep with him, as if you wouldn’t have offered your body to him on a silver platter regardless. 

whatever he wanted, his wish was your command. but on the other hand, that was your problem, guilt gnawing at you from the inside out. fear, too. you were a macher, you had the blood of a serial killer keeping you alive. you’d always felt guilty for that, but then you remembered ethan’s weird behavior prior to that first kiss.

a part of you wanted to believe he was joking around, just like you always believed him when he told you he was doing this or that while your friends fought for their lives. but contrary to what you told him, you did think about where he was all those times when he stood you up. you just tried to drown the thoughts out.

but you couldn’t drown them out now. what if he was the killer? no, that doesn’t make sense. ethan wouldn’t hurt anybody, would he?

it made sense, but you didn’t want to accept that all the signs pointed to him. sam was wrong. love wasn’t blind - not for you. you noticed all the little things, all the big ones, too, and never said a word to anyone.

that was why you felt guilty. 

you are such a fucking dumbass, you chided yourself. you’d slept with a potential killer, which ironically made things make even more sense. if ethan did like you like he said he did, that would explain why you were the only ones who’d yet to get hurt at all, much less be in the same room during the attacks.

shouldn’t ghostface have at least called you? you were in the friend group too, and close to sam. matter of fact, you were a target. they’d tried to frame you for the crimes. you still remembered sitting in detective bailey’s office with sam and tara, baffled.

that was when your phone started to ring. 

you jolted, startled. maybe it was ethan, who’d been trying to reach you for the past few days following the hookup, but you were too conflicted to speak to him right now. or maybe it was ghostface, but all your friends were pretty sure that was a synonym for ethan at this point.

when you looked at the caller id, much to your surprise, it was mindy. you pressed your phone to your ear and said, “hello?”

“hey, ghostface,” greeted mindy. you heard chad and sam groan in the background, saying something about her needing to stop being so mean to you. “the gang are at chad’s job and you’re invited to the hangout.”

“you’re hanging out,” you started, trying to wrap your head around her words. “at chad’s job?”

“we’re hanging out,” chad said, having snatched the phone from mindy. you also figured that you were on speaker. “come on, it’ll be fun. it’s a wednesday night, nobody ever comes here on wednesday nights. plus, you can get discounted surfboards.”

you grumbled, “what the fuck am i going to do with a surfboard?”

“i don’t know. surf, maybe?” chad retorted.

“give me my phone back,” mindy snarled, taking her phone from her twin. “listen, sam said you should come and i don’t think her wrath is something you wanna deal with right now.”

“okay, i’m coming. i’m coming,” you said, swiping your keys on the counter and slipping on your shoes. 

“see’ya.”

the call disconnected. “jesus,” you mumbled under your breath, heading out the front door.

chad worked part-time at a surf shop that happened to not be too much of a distance from your apartment. you walked inside, chad behind the bar flirting with tara, mindy and sam arguing over a surfboard design that mindy thought that was hideous and sam found cute, but your eyes locked on ethan.

you didn’t know why you thought that he wouldn’t be here.

you shifted your gaze. this was about to be the most awkward hangout of your life. 

“look who’s here in the flesh,” chad announced, almost looking surprised to see you there.

mindy clasped her hands together and said, “yes, instead of cutting other people’s flesh.”

chad groaned, “god, mindy, could you stop with the accusations for five goddamn seconds?”

“it’s fine, chad,” you said, ignoring her. “so, remind me why we’re hanging out at a surf shop of all places again?”

“because what better place to hang out than at a shop with terrible surfboard designs,” replied mindy. 

sam exclaimed, “the design was cute!”

“to you,” mindy and tara retorted in unison.

ethan had been watching you, and his fixed gaze was not lost on you, but you had no intention of reconciling with him right now. he shifted his attention and asked, “what if we get, like, attacked?”

mindy brushed him off. “you’re here, ghostface. why would we get attacked?”

“i mean, there is usually more than one,” you added, not sparing ethan a glance in spite of the fact that you could feel his weighty stare on your shoulder. 

mindy pointed at you. “that’s why you’re here, too.”

is that what this was about - they were trying to see if you were ghostface?

“we were together,” you insisted, as if that were the problem.

mindy rolled her eyes, mocking, “‘i was with ethan’ this, ‘ethan was with me’ that. yeah, chopping up people’s bodies like bonnie and clyde!”

you glanced at sam who immediately raised her hands, as if to say she was innocent. you thought she trusted you.

that was when you saw a cloaked figure closing in on her and you screamed, “behind you!”

sam skirted out of the way just in time to slip shy of the ghostface’s knife, alarming the six of you. you all immediately started to run, screaming in terror.

chad darted from behind the cash register with tara’s hand in his, dashing over to the entrance, but the door was locked from the inside. he grumbled, “what the fuck?”

you glared, shouting, “are you sure he’s not the killer?”

“don’t ever fucking say that again,” tara exclaimed in lieu of mindy, and frankly you weren’t inclined to get on the bad side of multiple people, so you kept your mouth shut.

then, the unimaginable happened, and the ghostface started charging after you. you ran as fast as you could, almost tripping over your own feet, zipping past racks of clothes. the ghostface caught you at a surfboard stand. you slid to the left, but it followed you, and the pattern repeated when you slid to the right. you made an instinct-driven decision to snatch one of the (agreeably ugly) surfboards off the stand that mindy and sam had been debating over, smacking the masked figure with it.

then, you ran for your life. 

chad pointed at the surfboards and exclaimed, “see, they come in handy!”

you couldn’t be annoyed right now of all moments. what the fuck am i going to do with a surfboard? it looked like you had your answer.

the ghostface gave up on pursuing you for the meantime, chasing sam upstairs. mindy went behind her, and before following suit, chad said to tara, “there’s an exit at the back of that room. go see if it’s open.”

tara nodded, running away at the speed of light.

ethan tugged your hand and pulled you behind a shelf of flip-flops, pulling you towards the ground. you crept down, glancing around the corner, watching ghostface slash sam in the arm with a wince while you were hidden.

“why the hell have you been avoiding me?” ethan asked, whispering yet yelling at the same time.

you narrowed your eyes at him in disbelief. “do you really wanna talk about this while there’s a maniac chasing us with a knife?”

“yes, i do really wanna talk about this while there’s a maniac chasing us with a knife,” ethan retorted, briefly spying from the end of the shelf. “did you have some kind of post-nut clarity?”

you exhaled a breath. something like that, yeah. “i just need time to think.”

“you just need time to think?”

you bobbed your head. 

ethan was obviously not pleased, asking, “what is there to think about? i like you and you like me.”

“and all our friends that we’re fucking bonnie and clyde,” you retorted.

“is that so bad?” ethan asked, nudging your side. “you don’t wanna be my ride-or-die?”

you didn’t get the chance to respond before you saw mindy topple over the railing and you rushed over to shove a clothing rack out of her way. it was a less than graceful fall and it still hurt like a bitch, but a lot less than metal. she rolled off your back, murmuring a faint, “thank you.”

you gave her a weak thumbs up. 

you flitted your gaze upstairs just quick enough to see chad push the ghostface down to the ground floor. you pushed mindy out of the course of the fallen, broken railing, rolling over, and watched the ghostface crash into a glass display.

that was when tara ran from the back room, exclaiming, “the door was locked, but i got it open. come on - let’s motherfucking go!”

the five of you ran behind her, you and tara running upstairs to help sam - she had been stabbed in the arm - and tugging her out without looking back.

apparently you and sam were the only ones who drove your way to chad’s job, so tara took her keys and the six of you split up into two groups of three, agreeing to meet at the hospital.

but it didn’t stop there. 

after getting bandaged up, sam said that she wanted to end things now - there was no point in drawing it out and waiting for more bodies to drop. you gave the killer an advantage that way. it was fortunate enough that none of you were killed during the attack, though mindy was still recovering from when she was stabbed and that, on top of today’s injuries, landed her a stay at the hospital.

the doctors said that had you not broken her fall, it would have been more serious.

there was a consensus that you’d call kirby and detective bailey, who both told you to gather at the shrine. ethan stayed behind to have some injuries looked at, but the other four of you went straight to the theater.

wrong move.

it was you that got the call from detective bailey with the newfound information on agent kirby. you’d been trying to clear the theater with sam when your phone rang, startling the both of you. you put the phone on speaker so that he could speak with both you and sam, your heart racing when he informed you both that she was no longer with the fbi and you guys needed to get out of there expeditiously. which you tried to do, but the doors were locked.

it all happened so fast.

one second, you were looking for an escape, and the next, you’d come face-to-face with ghostface. you and sam burst through the door to the concession stand room, startling chad and tara, the latter who had a slash going down her back.

you helped chad deter the ghostface while sam grabbed tara, and the four of you ran for lives. it felt like you were running in circles (probably because you were), as if you were in some sort of labyrinth. all the doors were locked. when you circled back to the concession stand, chad got stabbed just as you were running out of the door.

“no, chad!” screamed tara. 

your heart wreched at the sight of chad dropping to his knees, blood gathering in his mouth and tears pricking his eyes, but you said to tara, “tara, we’ve gotta go, there’s nothing we can do for him right now.”

“run,” was the last thing chad whispered before he fell to the floor.

you, sam, and tara begrudgingly ran into the theater, abandoning chad. kirby ran into view, obviously a little roughed up, and said, “i’m here!”

“stay back,” you warned. 

tara hissed, “we know it’s you, kirby.”

kirby was baffled. “what? no - one of them knocked me out!”

“get away from the girls,” shouted detective bailey, practically materializing out of thin air.

“what? whatever he’s been telling you, he’s lying!” kirby shouted, eyes widening in horror when she saw one of the ghostface coming up behind detective bailey. “behind you!”

just as detective bailey was about to get stabbed, he shot kirby to the floor and the ghostface retracted the knife. all you, sam, and tara could do was watch as everything unfolded before your eyes - all of the secrets and lies. “great job,” bailey said, lowering his gun as the second ghostface came to stand beside him. “both of you.”

“you?” tara asked. 

detective bailey drawled, “yeah, of course me. frankly, i expected more from you and your sister after what you did to us.”

tara furrowed her brows. “what do you mean us?”

the ghostface to his left started to remove their mask, and when ethan unmasked himself, you stood there empty. there was no emotion stirring inside you - no pain, no fear, no anger, no shock. it was like you’d been milked dry to numb you for this moment where you’d run out of places to hide from the truth. where you’d have to confront it head-on.

sam glanced at you, your dull, expressionless face compared to hers and tara’s. “did you know?”

tara shook her head, looking at you with betrayal. “were you in on it?”

you said nothing. you felt nothing.

“this was your grandmother’s, sam,” ethan said, holding up his mask. “i guess it really does run in the fucking family. speaking of family, my name’s not ethan landry!”

detective bailey chuckled while the three of you were left in the dark. 

“is it, dad?” ethan asked, grinning. 

both of them started to laugh borderline hysterically, as if something was funny. 

tara repeated, “dad?”

sam took a deep breath. “wait, if it’s you two, that just leaves… mindy?”

the moment of silence before the other ghostface unmasked themself was the most dreadful of all, and you felt a weird combination of relief and shock when you saw quinn’s ginger hair as she sang to sam and tara, “hey, roomies. didn’t see that one coming, did you?”

tara exclaimed, “yeah, because you died!”

“kind of didn’t, though,” quinn said. “it was a good way to get off the suspect list. stab gale weathers, stab mindy on the train. that sort of thing.”

detective bailey nodded along, wrapping his arms around their shoulders. “yup, and i just made sure i was first on scene so i could switch her body out with a fresh one. a little fake blood, a prosthetic. you’d be amazed at what a grieving father can get away with.”

“i got your father’s mask,” quinn said to you, walking around with stu macher’s mask. “he was my favorite.”

you frowned.

detective bailey went on some rant that you didn’t entirely grasp because your head was spinning, though it wasn’t necessarily directed to you as much as it was the carpenter’s, which made you second-guess your involvement in this. why frame you for your own boss’ death if they didn’t want you dead, too?

“you’re a killer,” detective bailey said, pointing to sam. “just like your father!”

sam screamed, “no, i’m not!”

quinn screamed even louder, face tensing with anger, “yes, you are, motherfucker - you killed our brother!”

“you said your brother died in a car accident,” tara reminded.

“no, no, no, you sweet, dumb thing,” ethan said. “he died in woodsboro at the hands of your sister.”

sam glanced from ethan to quinn until her eyes finally landed on detective bailey again and the realization settled in within the three of you. she said after a moment, “you’re richie’s family.”

“yeah,” detective bailey said somberly. “now, it wasn’t until i saw those photos of what you did, i knew that you had to fucking die - you had to be punished! along with anyone else who stands in our way.”

you felt all the air whoosh out of your lungs when detective bailey finally seemed to perceive you, glancing towards you. he said your name. “you’re probably wondering what the hell this has to do with you. stu macher was richie’s favorite too, you know. and when i found out that his illegitimate daughter was friends with my son, well, i knew you could be useful.”

“what the fuck are you talking about?” you exclaimed. 

bailey waved you off. “you proved yourself to be very useful indeed, without having to be asked. being ethan’s alibi every time without fail in spite of being the only one to know he’s never where he says he is? come on, you’re a smart girl. i’m sure you knew who he was long before this.”

you looked to your feet, cowering. you could feel sam and tara’s eyes on you and it made you queasy.

tara made a jab at detective bailey which led him to go on another tangent about not being the perfect father and the bond between a father and his first-born son, but your eyes were locked on ethan. you could feel his stare on you, too, his pair of eyes as weighty as the carpenter’s. you could see something in him falter the more bailey went on about richie, but something hadn’t been right with him since the reveal. he seemed so… out of it.

bailey shifted his attention back to you, having had enough of being distracted by the sisters, and said your name again. “i dragged you into this to make you a deal. you’ve already proved that you would make a great partner. and i want you to be on our team.”

tara shouted, “what?”

“nobody’s talking to you, bitch,” roared quinn.

“you have to pick a side. them,” detective bailey said, waving his knife towards sam and tara. “or us.”

the spotlight was on you. your heart was racing, thumping in your ears. it felt like it was going to jump out of your chest. you stood in the middle. to your left, you saw sam and tara, shaking their heads in an attempt to discourage you. but to your right, you saw ethan and his family, ethan giving you the blankest, stare. 

it almost felt apologetic, but this was do-or-die now. you couldn’t let your affairs of the heart take your life.

the detective tried to win you over, starting, “this is what your father would have wanted. don’t you want to make your daddy proud?”

you’d been walking over to them, much to sam and tara’s dismay, but those words made you grind to a halt as everything became clear to you. and you fucking chuckled. “you don’t care about ethan.”

detective bailey’s brows furrowed. “what are you talking about?”

ethan shouted, “you watch your mouth!”

you shook your head, raising your hand at ethan from afar as you put the pieces together. “no, i bet it’s always richie this, richie that. ethan, did you want to do this from the jump?”

“of course, he did,” bailey lied, sneering at you. “this is for his brother!”

“god, do i know,” you groaned. your eyes locked on ethan. “i’m sure the idea sounded brilliant in your head. juke the roommate lottery, meet chad, kill all your friends and maybe, just maybe dad will love you the way that he loved richie. is it working? did you make daddy proud? are you proud of him, detective bailey?”

quinn screamed at the top of her lungs, “shut the fuck up!”

but you didn’t. you kept talking. you kept pushing. “i know who my father was. and i know who i am. maybe i was scared that because his blood is running through me right now, that i’d end up just like him. but i’m more than stu macher’s daughter.”

detective bailey looked unimpressed and ready to get this over with. “what exactly are you, then?”

“i’m the girl that’s going to walk out of here and live to tell the story,” you hissed, much to bailey’s amusement. 

you shifted back to your would-be boyfriend.

“so, ethan. you choose. do you want to be the hero in my story,” you pointed to sam and tara. “or the villain?”

it wasn’t unnoticed how you looked detective bailey plain in the eye.

everybody’s eyes were on ethan. the silence was the most terrifying of it all, the prolonged agony of the unpredictable. you liked to think that you knew ethan, but this was the only way you could be sure.

the anticipation blindsided everyone in the room when ethan made the shocking decision to walk over to you and spoke, “i just want to be whatever you need.”

you stayed on-guard as he approached you, seeing as he was armed and it could have been a trick, but you were pleasantly surprised when he handed you his knife. 

“well, i need a hero,” you told him. 

“then i’ll be that.”

shit hit the fan and everybody immediately went to war.

ethan grabbed your hand, somehow managing to pull you away undetected as his family dealt with the brutal sting of betrayal by unleashing it onto the carpenter’s.

you whispered, “eth, i can’t stay here. they’re my friends. do you think my father would have just hid?”

ethan shot back, “i thought you didn’t want to be like your father?”

“well, maybe he had some admirable characteristics,” you hissed, beginning to run to protect your friends. 

“wait,” ethan called out, grabbing your wrist. “you’re forgetting something.”

you gave him a confused look, but it all melted away when he smashed his lips against yours, kissing you with all the emotions a man could bear. you kissed him back just as passionately, almost as if it would be the last time.

“i love you,” ethan exhaled when he pulled away, because you two were running out of time. “i never would have hurt you, i need you to know that. that’s why i made plans with you and then i bailed. i wanted to make sure you weren’t there, so you’d be safe.”

“ethan,” you started. 

ethan ignored you, emotionally continuing, “i didn’t want to do this. i just wanted to feel like i meant something to him. and i know sorry isn’t going to bring your friends back, but...”

you cried out, “e, behind you!”

ethan turned around just in time to see quinn trailing him with a knife. “you chose the wrong side, brother. a loose fucking whore over your family?”

“you watch your fucking mouth, quinn,” ethan growled, charging towards his sister. 

you watched in terror, considering he was unarmed. 

“go,” ethan shouted to you, looking back for a second. “baby, go!”

you begrudgingly did as told, running out of the room and locating sam and tara who were currently fighting detective bailey. you hid behind him, undetected, and lunged at him. he heard you approaching and turned at the last second, but his arm still got caught on your blade and you managed to slice him up a little.

“you’re going to regret that,” detective bailey seethed, coming towards you.

out of nowhere, quinn charged back into the room, slightly injured but a beast nonetheless - almost as if the pain didn’t bother her. but you didn’t see ethan, which filled your heart with worry.

you didn’t have time to ask questions, because when quinn saw the knife in your hand and the wound on her father, she immediately beared what was left of her teeth (you had seen sam and tara holding bricks) and came for you.

tara moved at the speed of light and toppled the tv over, the one that had killed your father all those years ago, and sent it crashing down with quinn’s body. you heard something break that obviously wasn’t the tv and saw her go limp.

sam mocked to bailey, “looks like you’re down another child.”

“you,” hissed detective bailey, charging at sam, until you heard a gunshot and he sank down to his knees, wounded. 

you turned around and spotted ethan holding the trigger. he was limping towards you, blood dripping through the fabric of his costume, and he’d obviously been stabbed.

“ethan,” you called out, almost coming over to get him. 

“i’m fine,” he said, holding up his hand to stop you in your tracks. “i’m okay.”

detective bailey glanced at his only remaining child, speaking faintly, “you’re making a fatal mistake, son.”

ethan shook his head, face tensing with rage. “it stops right here, dad. it stops with you. no more of this bullshit.”

sam glanced at you. “you want to do the honors?”

you bobbed your head. “hell, yeah,” you said, walking up to detective bailey’s body. 

“you’re just like your father too,” he hissed. “you always will be!”

“maybe,” you whispered, crouching down. “but you’re forgetting one thing.”

bailey barked, “what?”

“i’d have to actually kill somebody to be just like him, and there’s no one better to start with than you,” you crooned, smiling like the devil. “for richie.”

“for richie,” sam repeated when you raises your knife. 

you jabbed the knife right between his eyes, stabbing as deep as you possibly could as you watched the detective’s face pale, before all the life was drained from it altogether.

when he stilled, it was like a breath of fresh air. sam and tara went to sit at the steps while you came over to ethan, lowering him to the ground and applying pleasure to his wound. he hissed in pain, and you whispered, “sorry. i’m sorry. i know it hurts, but we have to stop the bleeding.”

“it’s okay,” ethan whispered, looking into your eyes. “if i die right now, at least you’ll be the last thing i see.”

“don’t fucking say that,” you whispered, tears burning your eyes. “you’re gonna be okay. we’ll get an ambulance here and they’ll help you, and you’re gonna need a really good fucking lawyer.”

ethan snickered, brushing your hair out of your face. “isn’t the macher family rich?”

you rolled your eyes, bringing your lips to his as you kissed him with all the love in the world. 

he would pull through, you knew he would. everything was going to be okay.

[narrynukezankielover]

I believe this episode is Hunteri Heroici or something like that. I laughed at this a little too much. Cas literally took that little bag out of Deans bigger bag (I don’t know what to call it) and started picking through it. What I find interesting is that Dean doesn’t say anything to Cas. Dean isn’t the type to let people pick at his stuff yet he’s letting Cas do it. I was thinking maybe it’s Sams bag but I don’t think Cas would touch Sams stuff. I don’t think he cares enough to find out more about him.

Dean said he needed his 4 hours of sleep (you can function on only 4 hours of sleep I’ve done it almost every night since I was 15 and when you’re used to it it’s not that bad) and Cas said I’ll watch over you. He’s looking directly at Dean so he’s offering to be Deans guardian angel not Dean and Sams. It’s adorable because a few people have called Cas Deans angel and it’s obvious Dean is Cas human.

If anyone else was looking at their dad’s journal Dean would’ve grabbed that out of their hands told them to f*ck themselves and probably threatened to kill them. It’s a very cute way to start this very emotional scene. I love that when Cas yelled at Dean because he told him he wasn’t going back to heaven Dean took that to mean Cas needed to talk. Dean isn’t good with his emotions but the fact that he listened to Cas and tried to help him shows growth. The look of shock and worry on Deans face when Cas said he was afraid if he went back to heaven and seen what has happened because of him he’s afraid he would kill himself was heartbreaking.

I just found this look on Cas face when he seen Dean trying to hide his porn hilarious. Cas watched porn infront of Dean and Sam so I don’t think Cas would judge him.

This is definitely the look of oh hell ya by boyfriend can get anything.

This broke my heart. Finding out Cas was tortured and he’s traumatized by it was heartbreaking. How can anyone do that to that adorable angel.

I really wish Dean felt comfortable to be himself. He’s clearly a nerd. He wanted to LARP when him and Sam were looking at it online. He had a smile on his face until he thought Sam was looking at him then he went back to his normal face. He loved it when they actually did it, he wouldn’t let Sam see him playing with a sword, he likes ballet and pop music. He’s so scared of Sam laughing at him or making fun of him that he won’t be himself.

In LARP And The Real Girl Charlie asked Dean if he broke up with someone. Interesting she used the word someone not a girl which is what you would say to a straight guy. She obviously could tell Dean was thinking about someone. Personally I think he was thinking about Cas and Benny. Cas because Dean knows there’s something wrong with Cas he just doesn’t know what and Benny because of how he told him they couldn’t talk anymore. I know some people see Dean and Benny as more then friends thing but I personally see them as just friends. Dean likes having someone else in his life other than Sam. Normally it’s Cas but when Cas was still in purgatory Dean liked talking to Benny but once Cas was back he didn’t need to talk to Benny as much.

Yet again a gay moment happens to Dean. Aaron could’ve come up with any excuse for following Dean. He even could’ve said he was trying to get someone elses attention but he clearly sensed the best option was to pretend to flirt with Dean. Dean got flustered and banged into a table and then when he found out the flirting was fake he was disappointed.

[swaps55]

Okay so I usually don't really care for OCs in a story, but the Yang's crew has stolen my heart completely ngl. So I was wondering, what would Pendergrass, Aslany and Beaudoin think about the ME1 Normandy's crew? How would they get along with them?

I've been sitting on this question so I could give it the attention it deserves, because it's a really fun thought exercise.

[And now that I've written this out, I really wish I could put them on the SR-1 and explore it further, so thank you again for an amazing question.]

Beaudoin: By nature, he gets along with everyone, but I think if you were to put him on the SR-1 or mix him with that crew, he'd feel really out of his element. He's never seen himself as anything other than Just A Guy. The superhero stuff is for other people. Courage, bravery, heroism, and The Cause isn't his thing, not because he doesn't care, but because he lacks the drive and initiative people like Sam, Kaidan, and Aslany do. (Pendergrass doesn't have initiative so much as insatiable curiosity and an unsettling lack of concern for safety).

So when it comes to the SR-1 crew, he'd probably feel even more of what he did on the 'Yang with Sam - that he's not good enough to work with these people. But he's very good at hiding his insecurities, so you probably wouldn't see it unless you knew what to look for.

He'd probably avoid Wrex. Dealing with Wrex is outside his paygrade. Garrus' loose cannon tendencies would worry him a lot, and he'd nag Sam to watch that guy because he was bound to get himself and everyone else in trouble. I wrote a scene in my ME1-fic, Exordium, in which Shepard (not Sam) notices Ashley get weird during a card game, finds her in the cargo bay, and then discovers she was playing poker with her unit when the geth attacked. Beaudoin would be the guy who sought her out if he were there, and he'd give her someone to talk to or confide in about Eden Prime, pep talk her about her family legacy, and have a smile when she needed it.

He'd find Tali delightful and charm the pants off her. He'd make sure she had something decent to eat, and when he figures out she's lonely away from home, guess who becomes a Fleet and Flotilla fan and sucks Ashley into it. The three of them hold watch parties, and suck in everyone they can. Aslany has to be dragged kicking and screaming, but she does it for Clay even though she scowls the whole time. He'd be equal parts fascinated and amused by Liara's blend of competence and naivete. He'd be the one to shake Sam by the shoulders and say, "to you Benezia was a monster to put down, but to Liara it was her mom."

Joker and Ashley would severely test his, "you don't fuck crew," motto, but he'd resist. Virmire would put a rift between him and Sam, while also putting himself in a guilt spiral, because the other choice would have been to leave Kaidan behind, and he wouldn't have been able to live with that, either. Virmire, more than anything, would teach Beaudoin things about what Sam does that he never truly grasped on the 'Yang, and reinforce that he wants no part of that. I think he gets out of the Alliance after Virmire.

Pendergrass: We saw in Fugue that Pendergrass developed some pretty intense jealousy over the SR-1 crew, fearing that Kaidan and Sam had replaced her with something better. And I think if she were on the SR-1, she'd get off on the wrong foot with Tali specifically. But they're both huge tech nerds, and Tali is Tali and Kara is Kara, so that would pass quickly. It wouldn't be long before they'd be attached at the hip, and and when one of them said, "I have an idea," the whole ship would nervously hold their breath.

She wouldn't get Liara at all, and probably ask a lot of really inappropriate questions about asari sexuality, requiring Beaudoin to intervene and explain to Liara, "Sorry, she's just Like That, she doesn't mean anything by it.' She would have no fear of Wrex, thanks to Sam's reverent krogan talk over the years. Wrex would find her excessively irritating at first, but would find a deep appreciation for her after watching her work in the field. She's a different kind of warrior with different weapons than he's used to, but a warrior all the same. If you can imagine anyone lounging in Wrex's lap to watch a movie, please imagine Kara.

She might bounce off Ashley a little for similar reasons to her initial clash with Tali, but my guess is they don't make up the ground the way Kara and Tali do. ME1 Garrus is probably a little too intense and focused for her, but she'd get along famously with ME3 Garrus. She'd think he was funny, and take his side over Vega's when they play one-up with each other.

Aslany: She would predispose herself to hating everyone. This is her family, her squad, and fuck you. You aren't part of it. Opening up her small circle of people she loves so fiercely would be extremely difficult for her. None of them are good enough to protect her people. Kara becoming close with Tali and Beaudoin becoming close with Ashley would make her crazy. She'd need a lot of reassurance, and Kaidan is probably who she'd go to for it. Ironically, she'd find Wrex the least threatening and warm up to him first. He'd be skeptical of the fragile human who wants to spar, but ultimately sing her praises, and Sam would be insanely proud of this.

She might grudgingly start to tolerate Ashley, but by that time it'll be too late. She probably becomes more neutral towards Liara, but the swiftness with which Liara becomes close to Sam would irk her a lot. Garrus would also piss her off - who the fuck does this guy think he is, I'm the sniper in this family - but after the events of ME2 she would respect him for sticking with Sam when the rest of them didn't, and see him a lot differently.

[irradiatedsnakes]

btw in the tmagp launch celebratory stream alice's voice actor said her favorite scene that'd been recorded by that point was "alice and sam go to a place". so i suppose we'll be getting that next week :]

other notes. this statement (hey! actually a statement this time! what the fuck) was SOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

the cursed dice angle is so good, the way the statement giver took on that role (roll), played the part, UGH it's so fun. the theme of choice that was brought up is also so good- just. ONE more roll for old time's sake :) especially given that this is a TMI statement and how HUGE IMPORTANT of a theme choice and free will were in tma, felt very fitting. fantastic, loved that.

continuing on my stuff about the entities in tmagp- once again some things here feel very on the nose, particularly the statement giver literally calling himself a mysterious stranger. this feels like a fun little red herring to me, for people a bit hung up on the entities stuff. that's how i interpreted it, anyways. i wanna know more about this world so fucking bad, dude.

also, the institute's in manchester in tmagp, not chelsea/london. which means no milbank prison, no panopticon. interesting. (though soemthing that was known from the arg already- i really need to deep dive on that. tomorrow, maybe.) statement taking and artifact storage are still a thing, evidently, but noting that there's no mention of an archivist or anything like that. and the subject/agent/catalyst stuff, that's Very interesting.

once again, chester bringing up a magnus-related statement, here in obvious reply to what sam was talking about- just when he was considering to celia about dropping his investigations- clearly (imo) to goad him into not leaving it behind. excellent. and fun given the first TMI-related incident with redcanary had the obvious conclusion of THE MAGNUS INSTITUTE IS WEIRD AND DANGEROUS while also having enough mystery to draw sam in further. sam's seen the canary die in the coalmine and has made the decision to keep digging and that's fantastic.

now! characters! sam's paperwork :) VERY intriguing that he's getting all this stuff and celia's got none of it- he said it was due to that box about the response department, but i've got my doubts about that being the reason he's being saddled with all this weird stuff. also the questions on the thing made me laugh, very good. sam and celia have such good interactions, i love how they bounce off each other. also, with regards to the paperwork- i think there's a connection to be made about the statement giver's continued rolling of the dice (it always felt like my choice.) and sam filling out all this creepy, utterly pointless paperwork to "refuse to give it the satisfaction of giving up".

GWEN AND LENA. nigel dickerson, you know, from tv? possibly. i don't watch television. i do hope we'll be seeing exactly what gwen is being told to do next episode.. delivering something, keeping calm, recording the detailed reactions to what's being delivered. maybe we'll get a bit more of a clue as to what the oair is actually for. i do like that gwen's not become one bit less indignant, skeptical, and disrespectful towards lena now that she's got this job. i'm very excited to see her on her fist job she's gonna suck at it i think

i'll admit i was a little surprised to see teddy again. i was worried for a sec he might be going in the direction of getting dragged back to the oair, but nah. not yet, at least :) and ALICE. ALIIIIICE auaaaaagh!!! i don't know if i have much to say baout this part that isn't just (shaking a plushie in my mouth like a dog). very neat that she has agreed to help sam investigate this and actually go to the institute when she's been so staunchly don't get caught up in the creepy stuff! leave the magnus institute stuff ALONE you don't want to get into this spooky shit! like.. she does not want to get involved with spooky shit and she doesn't want sam to get involved with spooky shit but she cares about him and their friendship a lot and this is obviously important to him. so. (plus, the thing about alice's brother having been at the institute alongside sam and gerry..) i like them both so much. i am so excited for next weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek

[cuntylouis]

mmm that rolin quote about louis doesn’t sound good tbh, this is gonna be only lestat show from now on just like the books, they are even lowering the expectations in the loustat of it all imo, it makes sense in a way, but this is what I was fearing and it’s happening, Jacob and Sam are also less all in with them i think, it contradicts what Sam said to Autumn the other day but yeah it’s not looking good for Jacob.

Answering these together because i feel they're kind of in the same vein. I've read a shitton of interviews today and they're getting mixed in my mind but i don't remember that part about other writers not liking the change right now. I think him saying that they're not going to show what happened between Armand and Daniel was probably a joke especially when the transcript says he laughed after that. Rolin has said he loves Devil's Minion and i don't think he'd want to excise so pivotal scenes with them. I think it's too early to say anything about what is going to happen with Armand's character.

Wrt Louis i'm not worried about him being completely sidelined like in the books and even less worried about loustat's importance being reduced, because everyone involved with this show is obsessed with loustat and that relationship is the heart of the story. What i'm slightly worried about is Louis' own perspective and character arc getting lost with the increasing focus on Lestat and him becoming a character whose main purpose is to support Lestat's story and be his love interest. However i think it's too hasty to draw a conclusion like that from one or two interviews when we have many interviews - plus the show itself - saying other things.

I was in Supernatural fandom for 7 years (awful experience. wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.) and there was a common saying "PR is not showrunning". That means that everything related to promotion (which includes all interviews and public appearances by cast and writers) should be taken as exactly that, promotion, and not as a direct reflection what the show is actually doing. Promotion is aimed at specific subsets of audience or potential audience or producers or investors and is meant to advance specific goals. Different outlets get different interviews and content. Actors, writers, directors and producers frequently have different opinions with each other. They also often contradict themselves and might have really surpising interpretations. Interviews are often heavily edited, sometimes flat out misrepresented, and the tone and other more subtle things don't translate well in written text. People creating fiction for living are also suprisingly often really bad at expressing themselves and say some stupid or weird shit sometimes. All this is to say, everything related to promotion should be taken with a grain of salt, both things we like and dislike.

I was waiting to read interviews after finale because i thought they would make me understand better the decisions that were made, but i've just kind of gotten more confused the more i read. Lots of these interviews seem to contradict each other or what was seen in the show itself, or both, and i feel some of the cast members are slightly confused themselves. That made me remember that spn adage and realize that i really shouldn't be relying on dozens of interviews published immediately after finale to figure out what the show is trying to say or what are the future plans for the season that hasn't been even written yet. We simply have no way of knowing what's going to happen right now. Perhaps Rolin & co aren't sure either (i get an impression that Sam and Assad aren't sure what their characters' motivations were meant to be, though again, they could be just playing coy). We know that the network has strongly pushed Lestat's prominence, and that could be why Rolin is also pushing it in some of those interviews. Or it could be that whenever he promised that Louis would remain important it wasn't entirely genuine. We don't know at this point.

Even though you can't take pr at face value, patterns in it can tell something when considered together with the story. For example, everything combined that has been said in interviews from the cast and writers over the past few years and constantly putting Eric and Assad and Luke together in interviews strongly indicates that the relationship between Armand and Daniel in the show is considered important. The first two seasons have centered black characters and made race and racism a very integral part of the story, and the writers and other cast members have been constantly talking about Louis' and Jacob's importance. This makes me think this show most likely isn't going to suddenly sideline black and other characters of color for a white man and forget the racial aspect of the story.

This has been a super long-winded way to say that after considering i'm leaning more towards those specific quotes being poorly phrased outliers that don't necessarily tell us much about what s3 (and seasons after it) and different characters' roles will be like. I think i need to wait until we have much more info before forming any opinions. If the show continues to be great, great, if it sucks and becomes just a lestat fest, then i won't watch it. I'm trying not to worry about it too much now because i'll just end up making myself stressed over hypotheticals and things i can't influence

[grazi-your-rockette-queen]

NGH I LOVE SAMI YAFFA. teehee srry anyhoo can you write a fic where Sami has a big fat crush on fem reader (who is a guitarist in a punk rock band and is somewhat famous) and he gets the opportunity to meet her and take a photo with her for the paparazzi. And he's all blushy and anxious and eventually after continuously bumping into her throughout the night he asks her out and fem reader says yes and Sami just internally dies from happiness. and maybe a scene where fem reader kisses Sami on the cheek and he just gets so happy and stuff because the girl he's had a crush on just kissed him on the cheek. Sorry if this is badly worded english is not my first language I still have grammar problems

You Think That We Look Pretty Good Together- Sami Yaffa

hiiii ☺️ ur english is perfectly fine! i hope u like this! i adore sami so im happy i get to write abt him (fem reader x sami yaffa)

let’s just say it was some kind of music festival thingy that hanoi and the readers band were playing, and one of the nights there was a little after party for all the acts and that’s where they met.

he was staying close to his band mates even after he saw you from a distance because he’s shy and seeing you there made him even more nervous. michael could tell he was acting even shyer than usual, and he confronts him.

“sami, what’s got you so on edge?” he caught sam’s attention, causing him to jump slightly and retract his focus away from where you were sitting with your own band.

“uh, i’m just… i’m tired.”

“no, what else.” michael scoffed, putting a hand on his shoulder and softening his voice.

“yeah, what’s up with you sami?” nasty intervened. sami tried hard not to give himself away to his band mates, worrying they’d make fun of him or embarrass him by getting your attention and making a big deal out of it. he really did try to refrain from staring at you as much as possible. but you were wearing a quite eye catching dress and he accidentally glanced your way, both michael and nasty quickly understanding what was going on.

“sami! do you have a little crush?” michael raised his eyebrows, sounding surprised. sami swallowed nervously and his face went red. michael chuckled and covered his mouth with his hand. nasty side eyed michael, hitting his shoulder, causing mike to silence himself.

“listen, do you wanna talk to her?” nasty asked seriously, looking into sami’s eyes. he nodded hesitantly. “then just go up to her, ask her her name, compliment her. it’s easy.” nasty reassured him. sami exhaled and nodded, his confidence slowly building up despite his nerves.

“so are you gonna do it?” michael asked. sami looked over in your direction again, making sure you weren’t too busy talking to other people.

“yeah. yeah i will.” michael cheered and nasty gave him an encouraging pat on his shoulder. sami took another deep breath before turning around and walking over to get a drink on the way to where he saw you. he felt like having a cold bottle in hand would help calm him. as he was walking he wondered if he started wondering if he looked alright or if he was walking weirdly. the thoughts vanished along with everything else nasty told him as advice as soon as you looked up at him. his jaw loosened and his eyes widened when he realized he had the spotlight.

“uh, hi.” he almost stuttered. you smiled friendly and returned the greeting. “i’m… sami…” he continued, starting to trail off as he lost confidence and considered turning his ass around and dragging himself back to the rest of his own band.

“hey sami.” you repeated, looking into his eyes that you thought were so pretty by first glance. “i’m y/n. this is my band.” sami looked at the other musicians sitting at your table, repeating your name under his breath.

“hey, you’re in hanoi rocks, aren’t you?” he smiled and nodded. “i’ve seen you guys before when you were in england.” he couldn’t help but smile proudly and chuckle a little and blush.

“this year?”

“yeah, only a few months ago, right?” you and sami kept chatting for a little while and ended on a positive note before you went to go get pictures. sami smiled wide as the sun and strolled back to mike and nasty, looking completely out of it. he leaned against the wall and sighed.

“did you do it? did you ask her out?” michael asked excitedly. sami snapped out of his thoughts, realizing that he never did ask for your number or anything.

“shit.” he pinched the bridge of his nose in disappointment with himself. michael’s face fell slightly.

“she’s still here y’know…” nasty reminded him, taking a sip of whatever drink he had. sami sighed and found himself looking for you in the room again.

“it’s fine.” he decided. so the night went on, the sky not getting any darker and the drunkenness only getting more evident among everyone at the event.

at some point, you ran into sami once again, this time unintentionally. and you quite literally bumped into him, both of you slowly losing your sense of awareness after so many drinks.

“oh! hi, sami!” you smiled, eyes widening as he turned around to see you giggling. he blushed and smiled nervously again.

“hey, y/n.” he said quietly as a soft smile returned to his face. he realized he had been given another chance to ask you out, and he had no intention of forgetting. “oh, there’s something i meant to ask you-” he fumbled with whatever bottle he had in his hand now, stuttering. but you cut him off, something you wouldn’t have done if you were fully sober, by saying:

“sami, you’re so sweet, you know?” you took his hand, still giggly. he blushed bright red at the contact.

“uh- thank you.” his voice somehow got even quieter and he looked down, incapable of hiding his smile any other way. “but listen, do you think we could maybe go out sometime? i mean- would you want to, ‘cause if you don’t then-” you interrupted his nervous rambling with affirmative words, just what he needed.

“of course i would like to, sam.” you were smiling as wide as him now, looking into his eyes with the same adoration he had in his. he laughed excitedly. you turned your head from him to a voice who was calling your name once again,

“oh, i think i’ve got to go.” you got really close to him, making him almost panic, and kissed his cheek softly while pressing a napkin into his hands, which, as he would later understand, had your phone number written on it. he felt hot even after you left him standing against the wall, watching you disappear into a crowd for the last time that night, sighing happily.

[bookshelf-dust]

another request for Gareth! what if artist!reader asks Gareth if they can draw him and he gets all panicky and blushy🥺🥺

(don't you dare worry if I'll like it or not, I know your work is going to be amazing as always and the important people is that you enjoy writing it!)

bane of my existence

gareth emerson x gn!reader

word count: 622

warnings: swearing, fluff

a/n: hi lovely! this was fun to write. the art kid in me enjoyed it. i hope you like this too!! <333 love you!

————

You set down the piece of charcoal you’ve been using, start playing with your eraser. You stretch the putty out, trying to get some of the dust off of your fingertips.

“Gare?” You ask, something coming to mind. You’re sick of charcoal for today.

“Hm?” He’s sitting on your bed, raiding your comic book stash.

“Can I draw you?”

Gareth’s fingers freeze where they flip through an issue of Captain America, one with Sam in your favorite red outfit on the cover. The boy feels his face go red. He’s panicking.

Drawing him would mean you’re looking at him intensely for however long—long enough for you to pick on all his flaws.

“Are you sure you wanna do that?”

You nod, patting the eraser over the edge of your desk. There really is charcoal everywhere.

“Yes. You’re the prettiest boy I’ve ever seen. I think you should be documented.”

Gareth shuts the comic and sets it on the bed before running his hands down his face. He’s trying to hide the blush before you see it.

You look up at him. “I have a new pen I want to try too,” you say, but your voice softens even more when you notice his state. “Gareth,” you coo. “Don’t go all shy on me please.”

He puts his hands down and you grin at his reddened cheeks.

“I’m gonna hide again if you don’t stop looking at me like that.”

“I don’t have to if you’re really not okay with it, Gare.”

He finally makes eye contact with you. “No! No, it’s okay. Do I need to do anything?”

You grin again. “Nope. Just forget I’m here.”

He rolls his eyes. “That’s impossible.”

Now you’re the one blushing.

————

True to your request, Gareth does his best to relax and go about his business of sorting through your belongings. Your comic book collection is much more extensive than his, and frankly, he’s kind of jealous.

You sit in your desk chair, one knee propped up with your sketchbook resting on it.

You started off using a pencil, sketching the prettiest parts of him—which proved difficult since they’re all the prettiest parts. You decided this would be more fun than a portrait or anything. Portraits stress you out.

Now your page is full of different Gareth features. His nose, his mouth. You’re working on the eyes now, the ink from your pen spreading over the paper to give him the long and unfair lashes he has.

You’ve used the pen to hatch some shadows in the areas that need them, and even if it’s a little messy—and by no means perfect—you’ve had fun drawing him.

You stand, capping your pen. You hand the notebook to Gareth, who looks over it so intently that it makes you nervous.

“Damn,” he says.

“Good ‘damn’ or bad?” You ask tentatively.

“Very good. Although I can tell you spent a little more time on my eyelashes than probably necessary.”

Your face splits in a grin and you take his in your hands. “Your eyelashes are the bane of my existence, Gareth Emerson.”

He laughs heartily. “And your nose,” you start. “And your mouth. And your freckles. Your everything.”

You tilt your head back, mock swooning. Gareth is bright pink, and you soothe your thumbs over the apples of his cheeks. “You really like them though?” You ask, needing reassurance.

His eyes dart to the page in your sketchbook again. You really are talented. Everything is so simple, the lines practiced though messy. “I love them,” he says.

Gareth pauses, looking you over.

“You have charcoal on the side of your neck, honey.”

“Dammit!” You exclaim, releasing him from your hold to examine the crime scene in the mirror.

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

[bengiyo]

My School President Ep 11 Stray Thoughts

We're nearing the end and heading back to the beach.

Last week, we finally faced Hot Wave, but not before saddling Tinn with the responsibility of keeping a health scare away from Gun. Gun finally learned how much Tinn has done for him, and the two are finally looking at each other properly. I still tear up watching the video for Let Me Tell You when I think about the last thing Mrs. Gim might have seen was her son singing his heart out on stage.

I know I said last week that it didn't matter if they won at this point, but this shit hurted. I think about how much of a loser Gun feels like all the time, and he put so much hope into this competition.

Win and Gun haven't gotten into any universities.

Chinzhilla is not okay, and you can feel them tearing at the seams.

Oh, Gun, please talk to Tinn.

Wasn't exactly expecting Por to be the one trying to hold the band together, and it's so sad to see him crying alone.

I'm so relieved that Mrs. Gim is okay and seems like herself. She consistently asks the right things to Gun so he's receptive to more uplifting perspectives.

Oof, Fourth is so dehydrated in this hospital scene. Get some chapstick for my boy.

Tinn remains the best boy. He knows things aren't great for Chinzhilla and so arranges a performance before a friendly crowd, and he was trying to bring a gift for his boyfriend's mom.

I like the design of Tinn's family's home theater setup.

Baby Tinn photos!!

You know Tinn's parents have their shit together. They both have actual pajamas.

I get Photjanee. She can be worried about her son without being a villain. She worries that she wasn't a good mother. She worries that she can't help her son and that be won't forgive her. She cares that she was a good partner to her husband.

At least the show is doing some interesting character work with the band's loss. Win's breakdown is affective, and I like Sound just letting him get the feelings out.

Oh good. They're by the pool. Hopefully we get Gun back on his feet.

It's interesting seeing them okay in the past without Sound, because now it feels like he's missing.

I feel so much for Gun, because he's just a a guy, you know? We see him through Tinn's eyes a lot, but so many other things and people tell Gun that his best isn't enough.

Fourth is a good crier.

"I want to eat you." Listen, Mark Pakin, you have no idea how hard these folks ride on crumbs.

The greatest subversion of a trope ever is future winner of the 2023 NAMGOONG BEST BOY AWARD Tiwson not catching Por before he fell down those stairs.

That's right, Por. Get these boys back to the beach.

I just knew they were gonna cut off the question. I like Photjanee going to see Gun away from school. I like that she seems to be trying to understand Gun more now that she's aware of his importance to Tinn.

Look, y'all, I have never doubted Photjanee, and we're seeing it here. Whatever reservations she has, she's not inflicting them on Tinn. She didn't forbid the trip.

Gun's shirt says TOGETHER FOREVER in a heart shape.

Gosh I love Chinzhilla, but they do seem to always face unforseen troubles.

Did Phat just quote Sam from The Lord of the Rings??? I'm gonna McFuckinLoseIt.

I love playing You Got Ma Back as they make the trek together.

Things were getting tense. Oishii must save us. Everyone drink the BL Juice so we can make it up the mountain.

Gosh Chinzhilla is so dumb together sometimes. Tinn's reactions to them are golden.

A band is a little family, and only family can cut you this deep. And just like that, they also come back together. I just really want them to succeed together.

Of course Tinn went with Gun to get water for them while they rested.

I love these boys so much. Gun just didn't want to let his friends down.

I NEVER ONCE DOUBTED PHOTJANEE. This is how parents should work out their worries for their kids. We talked about this during 21 Days Theory, and here we are again. You talk with the other parent or caregiver, and you make sure that whatever your kid might face, you have their back.

Suddenly Tiwson. You just knew he was gonna show up. Ford Arun, you be careful with those eyes too!

"I want veggies." We know, Fourth.

Oh, Yak. You're such a weirdo, but you care. He remembers them as glowing. I love this show when they tried to sing their seniors home. Now they're singing themselves home. I need to lay down.

Oh my God. I said it felt like Sound was missing, and so they just put him in this song.

And now Tinn is here? Help

They let Tinn and Tiwson be part of the Chinzhilla tribute. I am HOLLERING through my TEARS.

Tinn for him a music box that plays the song he wrote for him. I can't take anymore! I surrender!

Noh Shinwoo would love Tinn.

I swear this show better not deny me like Mr. Unlucky or I will revolt.

FINISH YOUR DRINKS!!!

Okay, Tinn, you're getting smoother.

I believe in Photjanee. This cliffhanger and preview cannot stop me.

[this-is-a-dystopian-parable]

ACT TWOOO

1/2/3/?

So we got out of the show, definitely crying after Seconds. We stood up immediately during the applause they DESERVED IT.

We went out to the lobby and were given our posters while we waited for the cast to change and come back! We started saying hi to them before they were even out into the lobby, and they were excited to sing our posters and hear what we thought about the show!

I said hi to the costume designer, who recognized me from my DJ cosplay. Which is insane to me. Also bc the DJ has a cool metal wire mask thing he wears during Electric Future and it kinda reminds me of my design hehe. Also the music director, and the sound designer! Who wanted to know our thoughts and seemed really excited to explain his ideas and what he did with the sound, it was really busy so I hope we have more time to talk next show!

We again met up with Sam and Aya to talk about how much we all enjoyed the show. And they got to meet their new counterparts. We took even MORE pictures with everyone. THEN got to chat with some of the cast about like, bootlegs and demos and behind the scenes stuff they were excited to share. Which was very cool.

I got to talk to the DJ'S ACTOR. I told him I'm the number one DJ fan and he says "what does that say about you? Should I be concerned?"

mmm. yeah maybe.

He also said the DJ is his favorite character too but like. He does play him.

We hung out talking to people for WAY too long and didn't get moving until like 10:30. But it was so worth it. I hope tonight we get to talk to Krista and some of the designers more!

The Prize:

Some little changes. The whole "there's a home and a hot meal for everyone" bit was extended, with more about poverty and helping people.

We're back to the DJ striking down people during The Prize so I'm going to be honest I was kinda distracted during the second half. He was doing wonderfully.

My Weird:

Ok I will have to write a whole new thing about Grace and Tye's new dynamics. There's less focus now on Grace being kinda pushy with their relationship while Tye is more worried for the future. Now it's a lot more about Tye not knowing who they're going to be, much more subtly just not knowing if being married, attaching themselves to one person right this minute, is what they want. Because what if they want to change? There's some added conversation between Tye and the DJ there too, which lays out the wider themes of the show while speaking to Tye's character.

My Weird was absolutely crushing, it was stunning. No major differences just. Them.

Squaredance / Showdown:

THEY LET THE DJ BE HOMOPHOBIC AGAIN

They let the DJ be homophobic again

For those who don't know, the verse around the line "boys are studs and girls are sluts and queers ain't even s'pposed to do that stuff" was cut in MSM

BUT IT'S BACK NOW. WOOOOOO

Otherwise? No big differences. Good Rodger and Dakota chemistry, different from either that we've seen but that's largely thanks to Rodger's new character being more religious. I'll also have to make a whole post about that aspect, I know people were a little worried it would make him the one "in the wrong" in their relationship, but it really doesn't at all. He's a lot like MSM Rodger, generally very anxious, and it comes off like he's using his religion as an easy way to explain his anxiety. He's not just a prude, he is young and worried about his own feelings as well as what his religion tells him.

But besides the new dynamic in the subtext, nothing new here. Once again I was kinda distracted by the DJ.

Bacchanal:

Changed Dionysus to Bacchus.

With the new Harper & Janelle dynamic, the DJ now tells Janelle "she broke up with you, remember?"

Electric Future:

WONDERFUL projection mapping here, I really enjoyed how the commentator's booth was done separately so it stood out.

Amazing Cyrus. I haven't talked about him much but I like what they've done with the character, leaning into the jock aspect and running away from his problems. Also it's no longer "crushed in a car accident right after they had a fight" it's "crushed in a car accident while he was driving" so ;-;

Uh there was a moment where the DJ put his hand on Cyrus' while he was in the chair and leaned fully over him and into his face. That is all.

ALSO the DJ could FEEL the shocks and he was enjoying them. Like he was getting a kick out of them.

For those wondering, the Mo ending was reversed. It was back to a slightly adjusted version of the original 2015 ending. Which I prefer. That's another post <3

Seconds:

We cried. Amazing. Man I can't wait to see the show again tonight!

1/2/3/?

[ilguna]

Hey I’ve just seen that you write for the last of us. This isn’t a request but what do you think about the tv show so far and the changes they’ve made to the story?

hey!! so i haven’t seen episode 3 yet cause i worked that sunday + i didn’t feel like watching it when i got home (and i’ve been writing since)

but HERE <- (tap it, it’s a link) are my thoughts from episode 2.

tbh, i like what they’ve done so far, even if some of the scenes seem odd and rushed. like them walking through the city in three separate areas were okay, but they were rushed and placed weirdly. at least to me.

and the scene with the clickers was also quick action, i think it could’ve been more fun if they’d drawn it out to give more suspense.

besides that, they’re cutting a lot of scenes that happened to be favorites for a lot of people. i heard somewhere that they cut the bill/ellie banter and there’s no magazine in the car scene when they’re leaving. also they changed bill’s whole base area and that’s kinda eh.

there’s only 9 episodes. and we have so many arcs to get thru still. we have sam + henry, tommy + maria, the university, the winter AND the hospital still to get through. i’m just worried that the episodes are gonna be crammed because they don’t have more episodes to drag it out

and tbh, not really that mad that it’s not exactly following TLOU storyline because if you want a side by side play, you might as well play the game. i am a little peeved that they’re changing memorable points in the story

anywayyyyy yeah. i like the show, it still has a lot of potential, so my fingers are still crossed

[agentcable]

Supernatural Season 1 Ep. 1 "Pilot"

Two brothers, Sam and Dean Winchhester, witness their mother's death as children and grow up trained to fight by a father who wants to hunt down the thing that killed his wife. Sam goes to college, but he goes back when Dean shows up to tell him their father is missing. The boys follow clues from a phone message and go to a smll town. There, they meet a vengeful spirit called the "Woman in White", who then haunts Sam.

If you want to watch the series for yourself, stop reading! This post contains spoilers to the storyline.

We are in Lawrence, Kansas, 22 years ago. On November 2nd, 1983, Dean Winchester, 4-year-old boy, says goodnight to his baby brother Sam Winchester, along with his mom and dad.

Mary Winchester hears Sam crying on the baby monitor. She goes to check and sees someone over Sam's cot. She thinks it's her husband, John. She sees the lamp flickering and goes downstairs. Mary realizes John is sleeping in his chair by the TV. She runs back to Sam's room. Mary screams.

John Winchester runs to Sam's room, but the baby is alone. Blood splatters on his hand.

John looks up and sees his wife pinned to the ceiling by an unknown force, her belly sliced open and bleeding. Her body bursts into flames, and the father grabs Sam and gives him to Dean. He tells Dean to take Sam outside and goes back to try to save his wife. He is too late. The flames consume the room, forcing him to flee. Sam's rooms explodes.

The scene changes to Stanford University, Palo Alto, California on Halloween. Sam is now grown up and going to a Halloween party with his girlfriend, Jessica Moore. He talks about an interview for law school on Monday, which his family doesn't know about.

Later that night, Sam is in bed with Jess when he hears someone break in. He fights the intruder until he realizes it's Dean, his older brother. They haven't seen each other in two years. Dean says he needs Sam's help to find their dad, who went missing after going on a hunting trip. The pair talks outside. They discuss the family's search for what killed their mom. Sam doesn't want to keep looking for their dad. He wants a normal life but will help Dean find their dad.

Sam asks what their dad was hunting. Dean shows newspaper clips from his car trunk. He says men are vanishing from cars on Centennial Highway. Ten people have been missing for 20 years, and it's happening more. Dean plays Sam a voicemail from their dad. He says something big is about to happen and they're in danger. It has EVP on, but Dean cleaned it up to hear "I can never go home." Sam reminds Dean he has to be back by Mondy for his law school interview.

Back inside, Jess finds Sam packing. He says his dad is hunting deer with some guys. He'll bring him back. Jess reminds him of the interview and is worried.

It's nighttime in Jericho, California. A teenager sees a woman in white in the dark. He stops and she gets in. She teases him and asks him to go home with her. He says yes and goes where she tells him. When they get to the house, it's in bad shape. She says, "I can never go home," and then she's gone. He gets out and looks around but is scared and gets back in his car and drives away. He looks in the rearview and she's in the back. He crashes through a barrier and onto a bridge. The car stops. Troy screams. Blood splatters on the windshield.

Sam says Dean and their dad are scamming their credit cards to pay for hunting. Dean doesn't deny it. Sam says Dean needs better music in his car. Dean says, "House rules." The driver picks the music and the shotgun shuts up. They drive off and see a sign for Jericho. They see the bridge where the car crashed and lots of police cars. Dean gets out and shows the police a fake ID. They question the cops. The cop says he knew Troy and that his girlfriend is putting up missing posters, but they have no leads.

Dean and Sam find Amy, Troy's girlfriend, and tell her they're looking for Troy too. They go to a diner. She says he last spoke on his cell from his car. Rachel, Amy's friend, is there too. She talks about a local legend about a girl who died on Centennial Highway. Her ghost hitchhikes, and the driver's who pick her up disappear.

Later, Dean and Sam search the internet for news about deaths on Centennial. They find an article about a woman who killed her kids and then killed herself. Constance Welch jumped from a local bridge in 1981, the same bridge where Troy's car was found.

Dean and Sam check out the scene where Constance died. They talk about family. Dean gets upset with Sam for not remembering his mom. They see a ghostly woman in white jump from the bridge. A few minutes later, Dean's car starts and tries to knock them down. The brothers run and Dean jumps off the bridge. He survies, but gets dirty.

Dean and Sam check into the same hotel their dad was in. John made a salt circle in front of the door to keep something out. He left his stuff in the room. Sam sees pictures on the walls and realizes their dad solved the puzzle. The killer is a "woman in white." Dean says Dad would have destroyed the corpse. Sam says maybe the ghost has another weakness. Dean says their dad would have dug her up, so they go talk to the dead woman's husband to find where she's buried. Dean gets cleaned up and goes for food. Sam calls Jessica.

Outside the hotel, Dean is arrested for impersonating a US Marshal while looking for food. He calls Sam and tells him to run.

In the Sheriff's office, Dean is interrogated and becomes a suspect in the disappearances. The sheriff shows Dean his dad's diary and asks what the numbers mean. Dean is surprised to see them.

Sam visits Mr. Welch and asks if John was there. Mr. Welch says John was there 3 or 4 days ago. Sam asks about Constance's burial and what happened in 1981. Joseph was unfaithful. He suggests Constance killed her kids and herself when she found out, thus becoming a "woman in white." She kills unfaithful men on the highway. Joseph asks Sam to leave.

Back at the Sheriff's office, the sheriff leaves Dean cuffed to the desk to answer an emergency call. Dean gets out of the cuffs with a paperclip.

Outside, Dean calls Sam, who is on his way to the old Welch house where Constance is buried. Dean says Sam made the fake call to the sheriff to distract him. Dean says his dad left his journal, but he never goes anywhere without it. The numbers in their dad's diary are coordinates. Their dad has left Jericho to go there. Before they can talk more, a woman in white appears in front of Sam's car, and he drives right through her. He yells, and Dean knows something is wrong. The woman in white is in the car with Sam, asking to be taken home. When he refuses, she drives the car.

The car stops at the old Welch house. Constance says she can't go home. Sam thinks she's too scared to go in. Constance tries to seduce Sam, but he won't let her. She hurts him and turns into a monster as Sam screams.

Dean comes to the rescue and shoots the spook. Sam drives the car into the house, taking Constance with him. Dean pulls Sam from the car, but Constance pins them down with a desk. It looks like they're done for, but Constance's dead kids show up, just as Sam had hoped when he drove the car into the house. Constance was too scared to face their children because she was guilty. The kids take their mom's spirit back to the netherworld, and all three disappear into a pool of water. Dean and Sam get in their car.

On the way back, they find out their dad is in Blackwater Ridge, but Sam says he isn't going. He's going back to Standford for his interview.

Sam comes home and smiles at cookies on the table. He finds a note: "Missed you! Love you!" He thinks he hears Jessica in the shower. He lies down, but blood splatters on him. Jessica is pinned to the ceiling, just like his mother. She bursts into flames, and Dean saves Sam. As the fire is put out, Dean and Sam get in the car and Sam says, "We've got work to do."

----------

For more behind the scenes, follow up here:

Podcast "Supernatural - Then and Now" hosted by Rob Benedict and Richard Speight Jr.

[spider-ink]

Let's skip to the issue right after George Stacy's death.

ISSUE 91 VOLUME 1

In the previous issue a bunch of civilians witnessed Doc Ock destroy a building, causing chunks of it to fall and hit Captain Stacy instead of a little boy (it was an accident on Ock's part, but they don't know). The fault should've fallen on Otto yet, somehow, EVERYBODY believes that it is Spider-Man's fault. The writer justified it by saying it was a Twist of fate, magically everyone thinks Spider-Man is a killer.

How is this not the equivalent, if not worse, than what Zeb Wells has done in his recent (horrible) run? At least the Fantastic Four had half an excuse to be angry at Peter for breaking into their building, stealing a dangerous reactor and attacking them. I say half only because they (especially Reed and Johnny) should've understood his situation and reasoning.

Beyond that, I've seen many people say that Gwen supported a white supremacist, yet seem to forget/ignore/not know that someone else briefly supported and said some very worrying things.

In this issue, JJJ states various times how he doesn't really like the Liberal ideologies and, worse, he states that it was better back in the '30s, with all the fascist ideologies. JJJ says this to the face of his assistant Robbie, a black man, that he doesn't care about Bullit's other beliefs, as long as he can crush Spider-Man. Rightfully, Robbie isn't happy in the slightest about this.

Believing that Peter doesn't support her in her weakest moment, Gwen immediately takes the path of revenge, wanting Spider-Man to be behind bars, and seeks out Sam Bullet who she assumed to be a good man because her father knew him back when he was a cop. Now, her obvious line of thought seems to be: My father was a good cop = All cops are good, which we know isn't true.

Sam Bullit plays on Gwen's recent pain from her father's death, makes a grand speech about anarchists and implies that Spider-Man is one of them and he is ready to bring him to justice (just as Gwen wants).

ISSUE 92

After finding Gwen and Bullit in his apartment, Peter does his hero reputation no help and plays right into Bullit's hand, taking away Gwen Stacy, making everyone think that after killing her father, he's after her too.

To save the day are Robbie and Peter, who, after finding out about all of Bullit's actions behind the scenes tells JJJ and, this time, he says the Bugle doesn't support white supremacists.

What bugs me off is that the only woman who plays a major role in those two issues immediately falls for Bullit's charade and can't seem to see past it yet the other three men who have important roles know it is all a ruse and, most of all, know and come to know that Sam Bullit is a white supremacist. It seems to play on the belief that women don't know much about politics.

Anyway, to sum it up: Gwen wasn't supporting a white supremacist, she thought she was supporting someone who believed Spider-Man, her father's "killer", was mocking the law and deserved to be put in prison.

[mlobsters]

supernatural s10e12 about a boy (w. adam glass)

oh i just noticed the episode title. is this where we get de-aged dean? lol not surprisingly i've seen that in fic a decent amount :P i didn't realize he looked so young in this episode

SAM Caught a case. Apparently something is taking people. And leaving their clothes. DEAN Hmm. About time this gig got an “R” rating.

meta snark?

SAM Look, I know you’re worried about the mark. DEAN Yes, Sam. I am. Between what I did to Charlie— SAM Charlie forgave you. How about you forgive yourself? DEAN Because I’m not exactly batting 1,000 here, you know? SAM Yeah, I do know that, but staying locked up in here, sitting on the ground reading the same lore books over and over and over again, it’s not helping you. You need to get back in the game for your own good. You can beat this, Dean. DEAN Do you really believe that? SAM Yeah, you’re damn right I believe that.

the words are there but i am not feeling it

DEAN You know, you also believed in the Easter bunny till you were 12. SAM No I didn’t. [SAM pauses] Look, I was 11. DEAN And a half. SAM And a half. Right.

little cute sibling bickering to help the medicine go down

it's hard for me take their conversations seriously when we swing into some goofy fucking music and plot shenanigans. i don't think it's just the edible talking that i've just been too aware they're Acting because the tone of their personal drama and the World Outside they have to deal with are clashing so hard.

and now we get this kid again for dean who is tiny but at least he's playing a more believable age (i looked it up after his appearance in s9e7, this episode he's supposed to be 14, 16 in s9e7)

snippet from my recap this show likes to swing from one extreme to another with the people playing the kids. first 18 year old dean here (who looks like he's in his 20s) with ~supposed~ 14 year old sam and now this kiddo playing dean is 18 but looks quite young and is.. 5'6.5". was looking at his imdb pictures at from about a boy (so he's next to sam) lol

dear lord i paused the episode because i wanted to look the young tina actress up because she reminds me of lara jean's friend in 'to all the boys i've loved before' (one of my favorite romcoms, fake dating hello and it's so sweet, good rewatch) and got completely sidetracked and decided to ramble about all that shit above

reminds me of her for good reason lol. but also she was fray on the magicians?? sad to say i completely forgot about that part. i've rewatched s1-2 a bunch more than s3. she was also in s11 of the xfiles of the re... revival? which i watched and have zero memory of other than that awful wig application they did on my beloved gillian

to all the boys i've loved before (2018) madeleine arthur as christine / the magicians s3e12 the fillorian candidate - madeleine arthur as fray

god, nic. stfu.

yes please show us sam getting unhinged over dean being missing

i feel for this little man having to act like jensen!dean. i can hear it! but it's still weird. habits i can sort of roll with due to affection for our regular dean are harder to swallow (the noisily eating kidnapper provided cake thing) with someone i don't have that builtin

TINA You know, before…I thought you were just another drunk. DEAN I prefer functional alcoholic.

ha ha. it's not funny because it's true

padalecki is doing a good job selling him being freaked out. damnit they used a sound that's totally a sound also used in x-files score arrrrgh

spn s10e12 / the x-files: fight the future (1998)

(because i know that movie so well i knew this sound was at least in scenes at the jiffy pop poppers and the big ship at the end)

flustered and flabbergasted sam is chef's kiss

the look down to his crotch made me laugh, gotta admit

SAM What? Don’t—Wait, wait, wait. Wait a second. Talk to me. DEAN Really, Sam? Now? I got no grass on the infield, and a girls’s gonna die. Sorry if I’m not in a chatty mood. Look, you wanted me back in the game. I’m back in the damn game.

truly living for the variety of faces padalecki is giving us

it's like watching a fic come to life. de-aged teenager dick problems and all

DEAN My voice is weird, and I’ve got like nine zits, and I have zero control over this. [DEAN gesturing to his crotch area.] I mean, it’s up. It’s down. It’s up for no reason. SAM That’s enough. Yeah, thanks. Uh [Clears throat] that's just called puberty.

crotch mentions: 2

SAM Wait a second. Are you saying you want to stay like this? DEAN No! No, but…if it’s between being a psycho rage monster/borderline demon or a teenager, well… SAM Really? DEAN Look, I’m not a fan, either, but…Sam, this is problem solved. And I’m still me. I can still hunt. I’m just, you know…dewier. SAM Okay, look, y-you have a point, kind of, but, dude— DEAN I know.

so i'm curious what, if anything, they had in mind there. but me, being the sap i am, was like. then sammy might die first 😭 (obviously not but still, that's where my brain was goin). could be taken in a variety of directions.

SAM Dean, I’m way too big to fit in that. DEAN First time you ever had to say that, huh?

crotch mentions: 3

SAM Big talk coming from the dude wearing underoos.

burn. and crotch mentions: 4

(god as ever, the musical score is just random mediocre hodgepodge. it makes me sad)

insert tiktok "i just a baby"

s10e12 / downton abbey s3e5 - lesley nicol as mrs patmore

omg mrs patmore can't get out of the kitchen 😭 woof. this keeps getting campier by the second.

did dean just burn the hex bag they need to turn the girl back? okay well i can see the appeal of starting over as it were, but looking that young and having no identity is a lot.

workin the beautiful lighting

DEAN Look, I know what you’re going to say, okay? But you were in deep. SAM I know. I know. You saved me, and you saved Tina, and…pulled a Dean Winchester. Thank you. DEAN Anytime. SAM Look, man… do I wish the mark was gone? Yes, of course. Absolutely, I do, but… I wanted you back. And now here you are, and you didn’t Hulk out, so… [SAM shrugs] I’ll take the win. As for the rest of it—the mark, everything else…we’ll figure it out. We always do. DEAN Damn right. Let’s get out here.

very sweet. dean being awkward about being thanked as expected

seriously truly unreasonably pleased at dean embracing the taylor swift song. i'm not a Fan or anything but i do like some of her music a lot. and shake it off is a fuckin banger and has one of the cutest videos ever. you can like all kinds of music! i don't care what motivated that decision behind the scenes, i'm tucking it in my pocket with a big fat smile

(after i watch her music video again for the hundredth time ;)

[luxshine]

“Yo  a ti, Cas” Or how mexican dubbing gripped us tight and raised us from Despair.

Ok. So I promised a big meta about the dubbing thing and so while I don’t have all the answers YET, here’s a bit of perspective on the differences between Despair and The Truth.

  First, a little background. I am a former professional dubbing translator. While I worked on anime series from Japanese to Spanish, rather than in live action ones from English to Spanish, the process is not that different. Also, I worked in Mexico, where Supernatural is dubbed, so that’s why I can make the assumptions I make. Finally, my specialization in college was translation from English to Spanish, so I guess I know what the hell I’m talking about.

  So let’s start on HOW you translate something for a dub. Back in the day, you got a ton of VHS tapes with the episodes on them with time codes, and, if you were lucky, a shooting script. This is to say, it was not a transcript of the actual words said in the episode, but the script BEFORE the actors, directors, and everyone else had a hand on what was said and changed. And thus, anything adlibbed? Is not going to be in that script which, at least for the anime side of things? Was a nightmare as the script was usually “And here X actor can say whatever they want” and I had to go and listen to the scene ten thousand times. Now a days, you get either a video file or a streaming link, and sometimes, the shooting script. If you get a script, btw, you can also not get a script in the original language. I know that the person who had to translate Sprited Away to Spanish was working off a German script, not the Japanese one. So yeah, some things can be lost in translation there.

  THEN you get to translate. BUT you can’t just translate word by word. You have to adapt it so that it will sound like something a person will say, and sometimes, literally is not the way to do it. And in particular, Mexican dubbing has a reputation to uphold as the “Neutral” dub that is send to most Spanish-speaking countries in Latin America, so we can’t use certain words (I don’t have the list at hand, but I remember that I couldn’t use “Llanta” for Tire, and so I had to use “Neumatico”. And no “sweaters” or “hotcakes” or stuff like that), AND we have to match the lips of the original video. Which is like, the worst nightmare ever because of what we call “labiales”, that is to say, the letters where lips close.

  I can’t tell you how much we all loved when a character gave a long winded speech with their back to the camera due to those damned closed lip letters.

  All this is to say that sometimes, the line could be “We are all in this together for good or bad”, and the translation become something more like “Estamos en esto, por las buenas o las malas” (We’re on this, the good way or the bad way) or “Estamos juntos en las buenas y en las malas” (We’re together in the good and the bad), depending on the translator, dub director, and voice actor.

  Depending on the client, that is, the original owner of the series, sometimes they will review the translation once it’s all dubbed and edited. I know that in the Avengers movie, a Disney rep was present on the cabin and forbade any changes from the script, which resulted on a couple of awkward lines in the end result. I don’t know if that’s the case for Supernatural, but I honestly doubt it. Still, translators can’t make huge changes for the dialogue. One couldn’t just ADD a relationship that wasn’t there, no matter what.

  (As an aside, due to the very conservative mindset of some tv stations, it’s more common that gay relationships become more ambiguous, by changing “I love you” to “Te quiero” which can be more of a filial love than a romantic one. And well, that one case in Sailor Moon where a gay character was changed into a woman because the dub director honestly thought the character was a woman. But that was in the nineties)

  Now, let’s go to how Castiel’s speech was translated.

  The original, according to Superwiki, went like this:

  Castiel:  You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you out of Hell, knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam. I cared about Jack. I cared about the whole world because of you. You changed me, Dean.

Dean: Why does this sound like a goodbye? Castiel: Because it is. I love you. Dean: Don't do this, Cas. Cas.

  And the translation, as it was aired, went like this (And people, you have no idea the war flashbacks transcribing this gave me, so I hope you appreciate it):

  Castiel: Eres el hombre mas amoroso sobre la Tierra. Un hombre sin egoismo; el hombre mas generoso que haya visto, y que jamas vere. Sabes que desde que nos conocimos y desde que te saque del infierno, el conocerte me ha cambiado. Porque a ti te importa. Y a mi me importa. Me importas tu. Y me importa Sam, me importa Jack, me importa todo el mundo. Y fue por ti. Tu me cambiaste, Dean.

  Dean: Porque suena esto a despedida?

  Castiel: Porque asi fue. Te amo.

  Dean: Yo a ti, Cas. (The empty appears and Billie opens the door) Cas…

  Castiel: Adios Dean

  Dean: No!

  Ok. So… At first glance, they’re pretty much the same until we get to the I love you. BUT let’s dissect it a little bit.

  Cas begins with a “Eres el hombre mas amoroso sobre la Tierra” which is not how I would’ve translated “The most caring man on Earth” since “caring” is more like “Cariñoso” rather than “amoroso” which would be “loving”, and yes, there’s a difference. Plus, “el hombre mas amoroso” sounds a bit clunky, so Personally, I’d have gone with “Eres el hombre mas cariñoso en la Tierra”, that would’ve given us more time for the rest of the speech, but I wonder if the translator choice for Amoroso instead was more due to the fact that “amor” (love) is more clearly romantic than “care” (cariño, in a sense, more on this later) and so it foreshadows the end.

  Again, with the literal clunkyness we have “Un hombre sin egoismo” (A man without egoism) which sounds weird no matter what language you speak, and it should’ve been “Un hombre dadivoso” (A giving man) or “un hombre desinteresado” (a selfless man) although the second could be mis-construed as “a man without interests” so “dadivoso” would’ve better. But the more puzzling is that the Spanish separates the selfless man from the next, which is REALLY confusing as the English is “the most loving man”, which would be “el hombre mas amoroso” making it quite redundant, so the Spanish changes it to “the most generous man”, “el hombre mas generoso”. To add to this, Cas continues with “that I have seen and I will ever see” instead of “That I know”, because it’s far more poetic. And loving.

  So yeah, Mexican Cas is basically saying that Dean Winchester is made of love and puppies.

  Ahem.

  The next part “You know, ever since I pulled you out of hell, you’ve changed me” is more or less word for word, and the only thing that changes is that the English sounds more like a question and the Spanish one is an affirmation. YOU KNOW that ever since I pulled you out of hell, you changed me.” Little verb tense play, that doesn't change much except Cas’s resolution to say what he has to say.

  And then we get to the part that made me squeal out loud. Because we go from

  “Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam. I cared about Jack. I cared about the whole world because of you”

  To

  “Porque a ti te importa. Y a mi me importa. Me importas tu. Y me importa Sam, me importa Jack, me importa todo el mundo.” Which at first glance is the same, but NOPE.

  First change: The original is in past tense “I cared”. Spanish version is in present tense: “I care”.

Which is a little non important thing except when you remember that simple present means “immutable absolute truth that won’t change with time”

  Second, the choice of word for care.

  I mentioned before that Care can be Cariño, as in filial, non romantic love (Or romantic love pet name, as it can also be Darling. It’s one of THOSE words). Other translations for care include “cuidado” (as in attention, concern, keeping, and worry), and of course “interesarse” (Which also can be care), “preocuparse” (care, bother, trouble, mind, fuss), and yes, “importar” but “importar” ONLY translates to English as a verb as “import”, “matter” “amount to” and notice how none of those words include “love”.

  Mexican Cas is not saying “you love the world, and so I do”. Mexican Cas is saying “The world matters to you, and thus it matters to me, but my feelings for the World (and Sam, and Jack) are not in the same league as my feelings for you.”

  And then Dean asks “Why does this sound like a Goodbye”, just like in English, in present tense…

  And Mexican Cas replies in PAST tense. “Porque asi fue”. And THIS is important because it means that everything he said before WAS the goodbye, and not what comes next. All the rest? Is in the past. “Because it was”. Not “Because it IS”. And the next part? Is their future.

  I love you.

  Te amo.

  Simple present. No ambiguity like “te quiero”. Spanish Te amo is for romantic love. Not brotherly, not family, not bro-mantic. ROMANTIC.

  It’s like “I’m IN love with you” (Although that’d be “Estoy enamorado de ti” and I doubt that would’ve fit in the time Misha spoke)

  And of course, the answer. “Yo a ti, Cas”. Not “And I, you” as I’ve seen it before (And I also thought it was, until transcribing the scene) but a simple “I, you, Cas.” Which ok, pretty cave-speak, but the meaning is pretty clear. Dean Winchester loves his gay angel.

  It is also telling that the empty doesn’t appear until AFTER Dean confessed, so no, Mexican Cas is not “happy with the saying”, he had to get to the “happy with the having”.

  And when Billy appears, it does seem as if he wants to say something more, but Cas is a love-sick selfsacrificing dumbass and so we all get our hearts broken.

I did get in contact with Dean Winchester’s mexican voice actor, and am waiting for answers to a small interview I did with him which includes the question “did that And I you, Cas” was in the script, and am trying to contact Castiel’s mexican voice actor. So I will be updating you on that. But I hope this clears up some of the questions about how Mexican dubbing made Destiel Canon :D