#i have plenty friends but she seems to only care about the ones that wouldnt mind if i got killed in front of them lol !!!
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twowink · 2 years ago
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mothers will be like something is wrong with you until you want therapy and then its just all because youre a lazy teenage bum
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peppermintbuttlemon · 7 months ago
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“I agree. Whatever relationship that Joe had with Alicia was purely based on Alicia's upset TT video of her being dumped, stating that it was a situationship. To her, all her relationships are situationships. Perhaps in Joe's mind, it was few casual, consensual sex between adults 💋. It was A who elevated it to a situationship, especially when someone is unhinged as her. Perhaps it was not really one. I just remembered Joe's body language on the pap pics, and it looked like he doesn't want to be too close to Alicia 🥺. Granted, he may have given her a gift, but can't friends give each other gifts, even if it is just a card?”
yeah to me it seemed it was just a hookup or two and in her mind it was a situationships of some sorts. i think calling something like this a situationship is maybe less painful.. specifically for girls to feel it’s more than just sex and leave a lil opening for it to turn into more. it’s obv she got upset by it which means she did want more. i still think she was behind the paparazzi pics and it was simply cuz she knew it was over and in the end it was all about clout for her. i think her ego was just bruised by him not wanting her. i think she only wanted him for that anyway like she wouldnt care about him if he wasnt famous and rich. and maybe it was nothing at all and they just had mutual friends and he wasn’t interested so why not use him/the fans to her advantage. either way i dont think it was ever serious. he hasnt really had time for serious anyway.
I agree he probably doesn’t have time for serious but I’m sure he’s got plenty of time to lead women on. ☺️
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bonesandthebees · 1 year ago
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on the topic of names, this is a random thing but idk just thinking about the meaning of names n stuff brought this up but i actually changed my last name legally !! (just this year, after my 19th bday pog)
i obvi won't say what but i will say i changed it to like . a word. not a name. i have an obsession w words with obscure meanings (like petrichor <3) and i've never felt connected to my last name... like i actually disliked it LMAO idk i just never liked how it sounded and whenever i looked at my full name i thought it just kinda . idk i never liked it
but ever since changing it to a name i chose, i just... i love it. i look at my name fully written out and it makes me so happy waefjwael I was a little nervous that it would just look weird and my entireee family was like "omg what if u change ur mind tho and hate it?!?!" even though i was pretty certain i wouldnt care, but yeah ever since i actually got the document back, there's been no regrets. it's one of the best decisions i've ever made. it's really helped me feel more comfortable in my identity n stuff.
i've had so many ppl question why i did it though lmaooo, theyre all just like "u can do that..." like yep! u can just change ur name for no reason lol. i mean . it gets annoying with having to tell all the gov places n stuff, but otherwise it's pretty simple lmaooo. def better to do it when ur young though bc then u have less places to tell
but yeah sometimes when im explaining to ppl why i did it, i get flashbacks to u talking about why you love writing stuff about names lmaooo /pos but yeah:)) just to say that i also really resonate with names having meaning n stuff hehehe
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(yes I combined these two asks since they seemed pretty similar, the screenshot is technically the first one)
oh that sounds like such an interesting class!! it's always fascinating to learn different cultures history behind names. I love the idea of earning a name that's the same as a family member representing that you're sharing an identity, and also the fact that you can lose a name depending on your actions
also that's so cool that you changed your name!! I think changing your last name to a word is a REALLY cool idea. also, while I've heard plenty about people wanting to change their first names, you don't really hear about people wanting to change their last names that often? but like, I get it. I actually don't go by my legal last name that often unless I have to, or at least not my full one. I have two last names but I only ever use one of them in my daily life, and whenever I hear the other one used it really bothers me. there's a whole lot of reasoning for this I won't get into because it's personal but the gist is that my mom added my second last name legally for me when I was 11, and so up until that point I only had ever gone by one last name. and the timing of when that legal paperwork happened coincided with a lot of major things happening in my life, so I associate the person I was with that original last name as being a lot different than who I am now. now I only go by the second last name my mom added on for me and I hate when people use my original last name.
long winded way to say I get it, and I'm so glad you're happy with your name now!! you gotta love that you can literally just change your name if you want. one of my closest friends from college did that. I don't think she's gone through the legal hassle, but she uses a different first name than her birth one now which she started doing during covid. there's no reason for it. she's cis and she doesn't have any trauma attached to her old name or anything. she just didn't like it. who cares y'know? make yourself happy.
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shenanogram · 2 months ago
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one guy said yay so here!!!! "the first thing that happens is that on the week the great twisting is happening, michael is in hospital because of appendicitis. instead gertrude takes sara carpenter and emma harvey to the great twisting instead. emma believes she can make it out and orchestrate saras suffering, but they are both caught and made into the distortion together, bound with the same webs emma used to cause fiona laws death. when gertrude returns, she tells michael they got "lost" gertrude than makes her focus on gerry and stopping the unknowing, leaving michael alone in the archives for months at a time. Later, gerry dies too, and gertrude shortly after. Keep in mind, he has no idea about any of the fears. he just thinks he has really shit luck
jonah decides michael would make a good enough archivist. His curiosity is not anything above average, but his trust was exceptional. He would believe, or perhaps be willfully ignorant of things to the contrary, you told him. Jonah decides that if he plays his cards right, if he places his assistants in enough danger and set them up just right, michael could be marked by every fear and become a vessel for the eye it didnt hurt that he was already plenty marked by the end, with his own near death experiences and all of his friends and coworkers dying within just a few years. so Jonah promoted him. He could, in theory, say no of course. But he couldnt quit. and why not get extra pay from his shitty job
Jonah picks his assistants, Jonathan sims, Martin Blackwood, Tim Stoker, and Sasha James. Almost all already working in research and marked by a fear of their own. he would usually leave the choice of assistants to the archivist, but he doesnt trust michael to pick the right ones
when the assistants first meet michael they do NOT have a good impression. Michael is now in his mid thirties and no less awkward than he was before, along with this, he has become quite jaded. He doesnt want to admit he cares about these employees for fear of them ending the same way the others did. He mostly stays in his office all day, reading statements and doing research, only popping out to give statements for the others to research, or even more rarely to go to the breakroom
i think his journey with the statements is actually pretty similar to jons. at first he questions them all fiercly, as surely his friends in the archive would have told him if something more sinister was going on. When Jane Prentiss locks martin in his flat for 2 weeks, he can no longer deny it this starts causing him to start rethinking his relationship with emma his old colleagues, but not gertrude, not yet. (side note: as an assistant jon is a little more open to the idea of the supernatural, he doesnt feel the same need to put on a brave face)
soooo jane prentis shit gos mainly unchanged? the big thing that is changed is that sasha lives. but its not very. wholesome. she still comes across the table, but instead of the not!them taking her, she recognizes the thing locked in the table as something like her. The not!them seems to recognize this too, and they have a moment of silent recognition before sasha runs in terror, she thinks the familiar fear of the worms is better than the unfamiliar pull of herself toward this other creature. she is the first in the archive to begin a journey as an avatar.
also! character developement! during the whole incident the assistants learn that while michael doesnt like to show it or even admit it to himself, he cares about them quite a bit! this doesnt last long tho because he gets the paranoia in s2 like jon does,,,,
i think he wouldnt stalk his coworkers,,, i think he would shut himself off more. of course the murder of gertrude robinson was not great for him, but his fear of death paled in comparison to the fear that his assistants could be lying to him. could lie like emma and sara did. maybe to him they deceived Gertrude too. after the vulnerability he showed durring the prentiss incident it was like whiplash. he starts not even coming in during the day at all, only communicating with his assistants through email. they dont know when he sleeps, as he sends them during the day too,,,, i think a lot of the season 2 plot would be the assistants trying to convince michael to maybe sleep sometimes and not work all throughout the night also polyarchives they r actively falling in love btw sorryyyyy
i think michaels behavior concerns the archival assistants but it also pisses thm off. like we all went through that why are you being so difficult about it? why wont you let us help? while all this stuff is happening a random researcher is not!them'ed. someone irrelevant idk also!!! he meats emma and sara distortion! it traumatizes him horribly! end goal is michael+polyarchives btw. they kill jonah magnus and stop the apocolypse and are gay together web martin, spiral jon, stranger sasha, and tim escapes"
do we wanna hear the archivist michael brain dump. yay or nae
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demadogs · 3 years ago
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2 things:
Argyle will be COMPLETELY stoned the entire season and he'll just think he's on the craziest *trip* that he's ever been on.
Now, can I ask do you like Mileven together or do you ship Byler? Or do you stay out of shipping? Or you don't care who's with who, as long as everyone is happy?
I think Will has a major crush on Mike. Mike loves Will. Like he truly loves Will but just in the general type of love, a platonic type of love. If Mike finds out that Will likes him as more than a friend, I think Mike will handle the situation well. He will try to let Will down easy and then be a supportive best friend, no shaming.
first of all the concept of argyle thinking he’s tripping the entire time is so fucking funny i love that so much.
second, yes i do ship byler and i genuinely do believe it’ll happen. at first after season two i just thought “aw theyd be cute together” but then season three came out and i saw how unhealthy mileven was and all the evidence people shared on here that leaned towards byler and i was like “oh shit theyre actually doing this”. i thought mileven was really cute in season one and when they reunited in season two but then when we saw them as an actual couple they were really rough. i do want every character to be happy but i dont think mileven is right now.
im gonna share the biggest things or evidence that totally convinced me byler is the direction the duffers are heading. this might be long. not trying to be like “YOU MUST SHIP BYLER AND HERES WHY” but you seem nice and open to either so id like to show you what sold me on byler and im curious to hear your opinions on it after you read this. there’s plenty of things that show wills feelings so i’ll focus on mike since you already believe will loves mike.
1. the break up scene vs the rain fight scene
this is the biggest one for me by far. i study film and every color pallet in scenes, every song they choose, even the weather is very much intentional!! the mileven break up is super saturated, in broad daylight, and has a very humorous tone. they couldve easily made this a heartbreaking scene but they chose not to. also theyre not alone its not a moment between just the two of them.
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the rain fight on the other hand is the complete opposite. it’s very blue, theres harsh shadows, its pouring rain, and the mood is much more emotional and hurt and they’re alone.
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looking at these stills next to each other even if you didnt have the context at all you would be able to tell which interaction is more emotional and means more to the characters.
also look at the difference in mikes face after el and will’s last word. for el he just looks annoyed and for will he looks so hurt.
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last point on these two. look at the difference between el and wills reactions to these interactions. i know you said you do believe will loves mike but look at el’s reaction. she doesn’t love him as much as she thinks she does either. why would she be laughing and highfiving?
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2. the way the last mileven kiss is framed!!!!
again with the film shit, THIS IS INTENTIONAL. look how mike is not only in a closet, but the door to the closet is perfectly dividing their kiss. this to me convinced me that mikes gay not bi or anything else. some people think he’s bi but they wouldnt have the closet perfectly divide them if he was bi bc that wouldnt be the reason for them breaking up. they could have angled this kiss so many ways if the door wasnt directly in the middle of them i mightve thought it was a coincidence but it is. also not to mention his eyes are wide open, he didnt kiss her back, and he couldnt say he loves her to her face. 
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3. this tweet
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i dont blame people who dont read into social media posts about byler. i normally dont but like come on why did they tweet this lmao there’s no other meaning to this than implying hes afraid of the idea of liking girls sexually.
those are the biggest things for me personally. theres lots of other shit with wills feelings but i just focused on mike. sorry that was kinda long but id love to hear what you think after this!
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smilesvt · 3 years ago
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honey muffins | pt.1
pairing: seungcheol x reader
genre: fluff, suggestive, possible angst later on,,
warnings: slight suggestive but nothing smutty!
summary: a stranger who catches your eye leads to a swirling discovery of your fates. will you succumb to the forbidden love that lies between you?
‘You know we shouldn’t be doing this right now Cheol.' You whined, hands pushing against the mans broad shoulders.
Yet your complaints made him even more riled up. The fact he could taste you when he wasn’t supposed to made the adrenaline rush faster through his veins, the sounds of your sweet voice echoed in his mind and filled him with even more desire.
'Says who?' he whispered, his lips like shadows of your own, his soft breath seeping into your very self.
You had never wanted something so bad, to feel his lips against yours as he whined into your mouth, helplessly and at his very edge.
But you had self control.
And you would never let your desire get a hold of you.
~~~
You mustered the energy left in you to fully shove the man away, however his strong hands still gripped onto your sides.
'You know exactly who.' you sighed, as if you hadnt had this same conversation with him plenty of times before. The man scoffed, looking away with his tongue pressed firmly in the side of his cheek.
'Seriously? That’s all you can think of right now? Whilst you have that pathetic look in your eye thats practically begging me for more? Don’t make me laugh.'
Cheol had never got angry at you; and he wasn’t about to now. But the tinge of annoyance mixed with desperation hidden in the depths of his voice made you feel slightly guilty.
'Fine.' You managed to speak out, your voice calm and steady, yet your eyes looked down at your lap, unable to make eye contact with the man.
'Do what you want with me. Anything and everything. But you know what risk that comes with. Is it worth never seeing me again for a night of pleasure? I would hope I mean more to you than that.’
His hands fell from your waist and onto the cold kitchen counter you were sat on.
‘Of course you do. You know that.’
‘Stop coming so close to losing me then.’ You poked at his chest, and tilted his head up to look at you.
He smiled, but it didn’t seem to reach his eyes.
——
Yours and Seungcheol’s families had never liked each other. It was a decades long feud, started when your great great grandfather opened a restaurant with his best friend, Seungcheols great great grandad.
The business had a slow start, what with the two men only being teenagers when they started selling their food to local people in the town. Little did they know, over the years, their seemingly perfect business would gain traction all over the country and earn them more than ever expected.
But as with most co-owned businesses, one half of the duo would become increasingly greedy, wanting more than the other.
And so the feud started. Seungcheols family had accused yours of stealing money from the joint bank account, and the business relationship crumbled.
Your great-great grandad opened his own bakery chain, specialising in his favourite, muffins: whereas Cheols turned his into a patisserie.
Fast forward to now, both of the families had stores around the country. You would have thought, what with the huge amounts of success from the two businesses, the family beef would have been quenched. Yet both of your families were stubborn: refusing to ever apologise or simply even acknowledge the other’s existence, despite walking past each others stores nearly everyday. And thats when you and Cheol came into the mix.
~~~~
You remember that day as clearly as if it were yesterday.
3 years ago, sometime in December, a fairly handsome man had walked into the bakery whilst you were working.
His beanie was pulled down low, with a few strands of espresso coloured hair peaking through. However the casual headwear contrasted the grey suit he was wearing, a burgundy tie pulled down in exhaustion and shiny black shoes at his feet.
You had had many weird and wacky customers walk in during your part time shifts at the family bakery (you worked in the heart of the city after all, weird was practically the usual) but something about this man had struck you. Your eyes had followed him as he perused around the store, occassionally stopping and observing the packs of bread. He looked way too interested in the baked goods, and you smiled to yourself as you looked down at the book you were reading.
'Excuse me.' A deep voice as smooth as honey had spoken from the other side of the counter. You quickly stood up from your stool and walked over to the till.
His golden eyes met yours over the rim of his thin gold glasses, with a sweetly intense gaze.
'How can i help you?' You had smiled at the man, your customer pleasing voice hiding your slight nerves.
'I was wondering, say you had a date coming up, and they really loved bakeries and such, what would you treat them to?'
The question had taken you aback, and he smiled as he noticed you pause to think of an answer.
'Well I’m personally a sweet sort of girl, so I would probably subconsciously choose something dessert like. A good neutral choice would be a muffin of some sorts-' you glanced over the array of treats that lay on the counter in front of you. 'I’d strongly recommend the blueberry honey one, it’s sweet yet not too overpowering, but I guess it’s all down to their personal preference.' You looked back up at the man, who flashed a warm smile at you.
'Perfect. I’ll take 2 of those then.'
---
It had been the day of your graduation when you decided to treat yourself to the slightly boujee patisserie down the road from your bakery.
Seungcheol remembered it as clearly as day.
The bell at the front entrance had jingled as a familiar girl waltzed through, a bright smile plastered on her face. He instantly recognised her; the pretty one from the bakery just up the road. She seemed to have recognised him too, as she slightly bowed her head towards him as she walked over to the till.
'How can I help you on this fine day mademoiselle?' he had questioned, taking the girl aback as she slightly giggled.
'Well I was wondering, say you had a person you wanted to impress and they really liked sweets, what would you treat them to?' He smiled at the words coming from her mouth, the ones that mirrored his own.
He gazed upon the small crescents your hazel eyes made as you laughed, a warmth seeping through his body.
His heart had never felt that way before.
---
From that day on, Seungcheol visited your store more often than he would like to admit. Sometimes he wouldnt even buy anything, he just wanted an excuse to be able to speak to you.
When the shop was filled to the brim with customers, he would simply wait at the end of the long line and you would smile at how stubborn he was.
~~~
'Its raining and you still stood out there.' You sighed as he shook his wet, curly hair in front of you. 'Worth it.' He flashed you his comforting gummy smile and your heart burst into smithereens.
'No work today?' You asked, looking down at the mans grey sweats and oversized hoodie, a backpack strewn over one shoulder.
'Fortunately not. There’s only so much pretentious business ladies in pencil skirts buying mille-feuille that I can handle.’
'I can imagine.' You sighed, glancing out at the thousands of raindrops hitting the shop window.
'At least its your day off tomorrow.'
You smiled internally: he knew your work schedule probably better than he knew his own.
'You might as well get something since you were stood out there for so long.' You started, opening a brown paper bag and waiting for the mans response.
'Hmmm...Is this new?' He pointed through the thick glass of the display.
You giggled. 'I’m glad you noticed. It’s a little something new we’re trialing, made by yours truly.'
'You shouldn’t have said that, I’ll end up buying the whole stock for you.'
'Don’t be stupid.' You chuckled, handing him the treat over the counter. 'Get going you idiot, I have to clean up.'
He took the bag with a smile. ‘I’ll see you soon, and let you know how good it tasted.'
---
Yet you never did see him soon.
The man stopped turning up after his shifts finished, he stopped waiting behind the long lines of customers. You would catch yourself staring out of the shop window, waiting-or maybe,hoping- to see a familiar mess of jet black hair pop into view, a gummy smile that made your heart burst, an outstreched hand waving excitedly at you.
But you never saw it.
'Are you expecting someone?' Your mother had asked you one day, when the shop was calm and empty, shaking you out of your daydream.
'No, why do you ask?' you wondered.
'You keep looking out of the window as if someones meant to be there.'
You nearly sighed, running a hand through your hair.
'It’s fine, just bored.'
‘Well the banquets tonight, hopefully you wont be bored there.'
The banquet had slipped your mind. It was a fancy dinner for corporate directors of companies around the country. Of course, you and your family had been invited. You knew your mom was hoping for you to meet some handsome rich man; she was always asking when you were ever going to get with anyone.
It was dumb you thought, constantly thinking of the man from the patisserie. You knew nothing about him, just his name and where he worked. Other than that, his whole existence was an enigma. That’s why it hurt when he stopped visiting, because you couldn’t even call him to ask what was up, or visit his home to check in.
He was a mystery man.
Then why did you care so much?
---
The truth was, Seungcheol wasn’t allowed to come see you. As he walked into his house, munching on the chocolate tart you had so carefully handed him, he couldn’t wait to tell you how good it was.
'Are you actually being serious?' his younger brother had said to him as he walked over to the fridge.
'What is it?' he turned around, chocolate circling his mouth.
'That’s from THEIR bakery... oh you are in so much trouble when I tell dad.' His brother ran off in the direction of their fathers study.
Dumbfounded, Seungcheol wondered. What was wrong with the bakery? It was just a local joint, surely no place his father would have any issue with.
However, as he turned the brown bag around to see the logo adorned on the front, he nearly dropped the tart.
There was no way.
No way he had fallen for someone he couldnt have.
----
So when you saw your parents disgusted faces as they looked at the family on the opposite side of the banquet hall, and your eyes fell upon a disgruntled Seungcheol, you had to stop your jaw from falling open.
It suddenly made sense, why he had seemingly ghosted you for weeks. His family mustve found out about him seeing you at the bakery.
His eyes met yours as you sat down at your table, and you swore you saw them light up.
You weren’t going to give up on this mystery man just because of your parents.
-
So fast forward to now, nearly 2 years later, where you were sat on your kitchen counter, the now not so mystery man in front of you.
Over the years, you and Cheol had been secretly hanging out without your parents' knowledge. You thought it was dumb, how the two of you, both adults with stable jobs and social lives, were meeting up in secret like teenagers hiding a relationship. Yet you knew if either of your families were made aware of this, they would do anything to stop it.
‘I’m sorry.' The man breathed out with a heavy sigh, his eyes suddenly glistening with the type of glow you hated to see. 'It’s okay.' You replied with a soft smile, patting the top of his head. You were used to this, Cheol getting too ahead of himself and apologising like a child getting caught stealing sweets.
It wasnt like he had never felt you before, the hotness of your skin against his hands as he ran them down your arms, your spine, your legs was something he knew well.
He had had all of you: apart from one place. Your lips.
You knew if your lips ever grazed upon his, you could never go back. And as much as you wanted it, as much as your body was craving it, you knew of its consequences.
'I’ll get going now.' He whispered, pushing himself away from the counter and picking up his suit jacket from the sofa.
-
You leant against the corridor doorway, watching the man pull on his dress shoes.
'See you tomorrow then? I’ve got some new cupcakes coming in that I think you’ll like.'
His ears shot up at the sound of sweets, and you giggled.
Some things never change.
He kissed the top of your head before opening your front door.
'See you tomorrow muffin.' he smiled, before walking out and closing the door behind him.
And everytime you saw his back in front of you, you hoped it wouldn’t be the last.
~~~~
a/n: ahhhh this is my first ever fic on here so if anyone reads this- which honestly im not expecting much- i hope you enjoyed, heres to many more xo
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pwnyta · 3 years ago
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Wanna read a rant about BNHA again.... it may be very similar but I like keeping all my complaints in one place. Its nice!
---
Its so weird how far away Hori has pushed All Might out of the series. Like we never see his like reactions to things, we get like a panel or two of him every once in awhile.... He literally connects everything in the series but he gets so little in content? Even in parts that SHOULD give him some time... Nighteye and Star are especially egregious. Nighteye and All Might had been friends for so long and had a falling out where they blamed themselves but they dont get any moments together at all until Nighteye dies and its like 2 panels?
At the time I was like- it sucks but sometimes that just happens you wait so long and then its too late to talk to someone and thats terrible but the treatment of All Might since then and Stars whole character story being her and her family being saved by All Might and she appreciated that so much she worked her ass off to be like him and they dont even meet? We dont even see him get news of her arrival or her death just after and it gets just one line? JANKY.
I think I was a little harsh to say Hori doesnt care about All Might anymore before because adding Cassie just once again brings his importance up again.... it really just must be that Hori is so fucking bad at like idk budgeting screentime or planning ahead.
Like I dont understand why Kirishima got a big(-ish) role in the Overhaul arc? Why wouldnt he spend that time on Todoroki and Bakugo who are SUPPOSEDLY part of a trio with Deku and building a story with them instead of just letting them interact in shallow ways?
Like part of the reason I started loving Kirishima again was because of that arc with Fatgum but like.... Kiri doesnt even seem to matter much anymore.
Or Mirio jesus. His story was so good that arc and then just NOTHING. He even has a good place to connect him to the story with both Deku and All Might but nothing came of it and he just got his powers back off screen in one of the most anticlimactic returns... His death in the Overhaul arc saving Eri would have been better if there was nothing to do with him after...
Eri too... all the tension and fear that comes with her powers and how young she is COMPLETELY gone. Especially since she just off screen fixed Mirio.
Its not just characters too like various story/world building bits just come in and then disappear ruining the tension they bring and then theyre brought back when its like... OK WHERE THE FUCK HAS THIS BEEN THIS ENTIRE TIME? Things that should absolutely effect the story since the whole story centers around Deku and people around him.
Stains melt down about the corruption of hero society that gets dropped until these last arcs and even then its like??? Who was corrupt? This entire time weve been spending with various heroes we never seen it so???
‘Villainous’ seeming quirk discrimination thing we get introd to via Shinso even though there are plenty of Quirks weve seen that are ‘villainous’ Ectoplasm Tokoyami and Shouji all have both severe mutations and scary Quirks which brings us to-
The mutant quirk discrimination thing that we only get introduced to via the villain arc to try and make them seem more sympathetic even though there are plenty of mutant Quirk users at UA... one of which lost control of his incredibly deadly Quirk once and almost killed a handful of his classmates... youd think thered be some backlash for that. Tokoyami would have been an easy target.
Sexism apparently happens sometimes... but is only featured like what... TWICE? Once where its used hilariously to make Bakugo look better by making literally every other character dumber, talking about him beating up a helpless girl even though theyve been watching these fights for decades and didnt even say anything about Tokos fight with Momo who was freaking out against Tokos relentless onslaught. And then Star-- tho to fair maybe things are different in the US.... SHAME WE NEVER SAW ANYTHING FROM CASSIE UNTIL A COUPLE CHAPTERS BEFORE SHE WAS KILLED OFF TO JUST NERF THE OP BADDIE. (Both cases hilarious are for the male characters story you may notice)
The UA traitor- I mean... God what a thing to bring up and then drop. One way to kind of get out of it and bring some authenticity to Stains claims is have the traitor be Tensei- Kill two birds with one stone. Tensei learned all his info from his too trusting baby brother and hes another corrupt hero which is why Stain attacked him... not that it really matters at this point.
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golbrocklovely · 3 years ago
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You don’t have to like every person or every girl sam and colby are friends with, and just because you dont it does not mean you are “jealous” or “ Misogynistic”. You guys really like to throw words around because you like them and because they are women without knowing if the asks you are getting are all from women.
Here is my reason ready;I liked Sam and Colbys videos because they explored and were daring. I genuinely had not seen other YouTubers do what they did because i wasnt paying attention to youtubers aside from Shane D. I HATED when they collabed with Jake and Corey, i thought they were extremely immature. I didnt like when Elton joined because he was bossy. With the girls they complain and get scared easily because this is NOT their niche. Stas claimed she was terrified and traumatized yet wanted to do merch right away and kept talking about it. Kat always hated this type of stuff, even in old videos she claimed she was religious and wouldnt dare go into this. Now shes been in a bunch of vids, something keeps “happening” to her and then she milks it, does reactions, tries to adopt stuff she wasnt even near like the whole Sallie thing. And now the focus is not Sam and Colby but Core4, which i don’t care about. Show me abandoned mansions and proof of entities, i could care less what photo dump Stas and Kat posted, let them do them with out making it about the 4.
I hate personally the whole insta model become famous just by association or posting stuff. I like people that put in the work to make connections, travel, shoot, and edit stuff and people that are involved or actually into this type of stuff. For example i agreed Mykie and Xepher would be cool to join. Amber not so much because she would probably get hurt and be too bubbly. If Kat and Stas want to rave and party and do that whole scene perfect, but to include them into all the paranormal stuff like merch and trying to make this core4 thing happen it annoys me, i think sam and colby lost what the real purpose of their channel was by having all these people come along.
Seth’s gf explores and does paranormal stuff, theres plenty of girls that do. But they bring along the pretty friends that are just going to complain and then actively milk it because they are connected. You have no idea how much ive had to block because i dont even see Sam and Colby stuff on the tag now but Stas and Kat and core4. And if i have to see one more video where what kat feels is discussed and completely ignores that Colby has a gift i will scream.
…i never said that if you dislike the girls that you are misogynistic or have it internalized, or even that you're jealous of them. i said that that can apply to some ppl that don't like them.
also, women can be misogynistic equally as much as men. we live in the patriarchy, we all have a bit of misogyny built in. even i. it's something we all have to continue to work thru.
that being said, if you don't like the collabs snc do with stas and kat, that's totally fine. i get it. just like i don't like the collabs they do with amanda.
however for the content that gets posted outside of youtube (insta, twitter, ect), that stuff is literally just them hanging out as friends. and they don't exactly hang out as often as it seems (minus kat and sam for obvious reasons). it all seems like a lot bc some fans talk about them hanging out together well after they have. and it seems like a lot of core four content has been made recently only bc of coachella. but even that alone has only created a couple pics and two or three tiktoks/reels from the group iteslf.
the same thing happened with vegas, the livestream, and colby and stas' bdays. it only seems like a lot bc ppl talk about it for longer periods of time. the group itself doesn't drum up as much content as you think.
but again, if you don't like snc collabing with them, that's totally fine. i can see why them in a video investigating isn't fun for you. i never said you had to like them. and i wouldn't expect everyone to.
and yeah ngl i need to know more about colby's abilities. like asap lol
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hazelolive · 4 years ago
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So I comissioned @anjchan8 to draw my ocs and I orginally was going to make it into like a devilgram with a short cute fluffy story added to it but! I thought of a way to include it to Kera and Damien’s main story. I absolutely love how it came out and feel it displays exactly how Both Kera And Damien feel at the end of this part of there story. (plus there so pretty like looooooook at em ^_^)
It had been 2 days since Kera had seen Damien and she was growing worried. Sure she was shocked to find out that he wasnt human like her but after that talk she had with mammon she had started to calm down about it. She was still a tiny bit annoyed that he didnt tell her because younger her probably wouldve found it awesome, but slightly more understanding now that there probably was a reason behind him keeping it secret.
She however was worried about her friend. She hadnt seen him in 2 days and any time she asked lucifer were he was hed say something stupid like. That doesnt matter, or kera im busy, please leave my study. Mammon didnt know where he was either. Which made sense because he left to follow her and She hadnt been able to get ahold of Diavolo.
So she was here worrying about the state of her friend and how it must of looked with her just walking out upset and almost crying after he acidently revealed his big secret to her. She had checked the addict twice and even cast a detect magic spell shed learned from Simon just to make sure lulu didnt pull any of his old tricks that he did with Belphy.
But she couldnt find him. She had searched the house of lamentation top to bottom while bothering Luci on mutiple ocassions. But he just wasnt here. She had been pacing the floor for 2 hours now and she was tired of waiting. She grabbed her ddd and decided she was going to storm diavolos castle if she must.
It was a little weird heading to the castle without any of the brothers with her to act as a guide. But luckily she didnt run into any trouble. She entered through the grand doors. She had gotten this but there was a sense of now what? This was a big castle with many rooms probably some of them hidden or off limits she she shouldnt just go exploring.
She decided that she might as well look for diavolo she was about to start her search when she ran into someone. She looked up after letting out a audible umph and saw she had ran straight into barbattos.
"You should be more careful Kera. Wouldnt want you to hurt yourself now would you?"
"Barb! Im sorry about that. I didnt mean to run face first into your chest."
"Its fine im just glad you didnt run into anything less forgiving, like a stone pillar for instance." He said knocking on the one behind him.
She gave off a little nervous laugh. Well this was embarrassing.
"What do we owe the pleasure of this unexspected visit?"
"I need to speak to diavolo. Theres someone im trying to find."
"Aw do you mean your little friend?"
She looked up surprised for a second.
"How did you- wait I shouldnt ask of course you would know."
He just gave off a little amused laugh.
"Right this way."
Kera tentively followed barbatoss, down a few hallways, and a long corridor till he opened the door to a room and on the other side damien sat. horns still on display but he seemed to be in a fresh pair of clothes.
She was relieved to see him and he didnt seem any worse for wear
"Damien! Your alright! Thank goodness." Kera said throwing her arms around him.
"You say that as if you exspected us to harm him." Barbattos said with a small laugh.
"Well not you but I know luci was in the room when I left and I know how he can get. Plus he refused to tell me anything concerning him after the fact. "
"Well I can asure you lucifer or luci as you like to call him was only able to give him a good tongue thrashing. Diavolo made sure of that."
"Can you give him my thanks."
"It would be my pleasure but im sure he'd love to hear from you."
"Alright and Lucifer probably wont admit it himself but he may have been annoyed because of all the paperwork he had to help fill out concerning Damiens sudden Arrival."
"Oh! Is that why he wasnt around for 2 days?"
"Yes, we had to ask him all sorts of questions, like who was he, where did he live before, how did he get here, Where he will be living now, etc. But we finished up all the paperwork this morning and gave him his own ddd so he should be free to go."
"Thank you so much Barbattos. Im sorry you guys had to go through so much trouble."
"It was no trouble at all but im sure you two have plenty to catch up on so ill excuse myself for now." He said giving a slight bow and leaving the room.
As soon as she left she found herself drifting back over towards damien.
"So I see you got yourself a nice new pair of clothes."
He didnt say anything just kept her back to her.
"Damien?"
No response.
She began to worry. Was he mad at her?
She put her hand on his shoulder and he turned further away almost violently.
She was confused but then she heard the tiniest of sniffles. Oh no. She leaned over him to see he was crying.
"Damien! Whats wrong!" She started to panic. He looked fine before but now he was crying and she wasmt sure why.
"Dont Look at me! I cant get them to go away when im like this."
"What are you talking about? Are you talking about your horns-"
"I cant pretend to be human. To be like you when im like this."
"Hey, hey, hey you dont have to pretend to be anything!" She said running around so he could she her.
She looked up and saw him open his tear stained eyes.
"But you said. Your were so upset when you found out what I was. And I was so worried and tired after searching that I didnt have the energy to hide it."
"Hey Listen here." She said as she gently grabbed his face and wiped away some of the tears that had just fallen from his eyes. "I dont care if your a demon. You could be a demon, a human, and angel it doesnt matter to me."
"But you said-"
"Im not done. You could be any of those and it wouldnt change my opinion of you. I was upset and shocked because you never told me and it felt like you didnt trust me or care enough about me to let you in on a big factor of your life."
"It has nothing to do with that! Of course I trust and care about you. I was afraid you hate me that you'd call me a monster and never want to see me again."
"I could never serriously hate you! I love you to much to ever hate you!"
Kera visibly stiffened. What had she just said!?
"You love me?" He said as his last few tears fell.
"No......."
"You love me." He started to smile. "You actually love me."
"Shut up I dont."
"You said it you cant take it back now."
"I said I loved you not that I was in love with you."
"You love me."
"How many times are you going to say that." She started to pout she was embarrassed enough as it was. She didnt mean to say it in the first place it just sort of slipped out. She was glad he stopped crying and was happy now but now she just kind of wanted to hide.
It was her turn to hide her face as he tried to peek around at her blush. He tried seeing her face but every time shed turn some so he was only able to catch glimpses. Well if she was going to be like that.
Without a second thought he scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder. He was just really happy now. He was basically over the moon. He could feel the wicked grin start to spread across his face and was glad that Kera was over his shoulder because she probably would've smacked him for it.
"What do you think your doing!"
"Gee I wonder."
"Put me down!"
"I don't think I will not for a while anyway."
"Do you even know where your going!?"
"Nope."
@butter-beel @anjchan8
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greyykittyy · 3 years ago
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[09/21/2021] 04:24 [Apawcawlypse]: :O 04:25 [Zadias]: Sup 04:25 [Apawcawlypse]: my fur 04:25 [Zadias]: Swiggity 04:25 [Apawcawlypse]: XD  what you up to 04:25 [Zadias]: Probably gonna do torghast 04:25 [Apawcawlypse]: ah ok 04:50 [Apawcawlypse]: no offense but you should leave that guild.. i ncant force you to but it might be wise you do before its too late 04:52 [Zadias]: Eh, I'm not worried about it 04:52 [Zadias]: I helped make it and I like the name 04:52 [Apawcawlypse]: i dont know why you even stay there 04:52 [Apawcawlypse]: like i feel sobad for you 04:52 [Zadias]: Well for one because guilds don't really matter to me, and beyond that Nev is in it so 04:52 [Apawcawlypse]: my guys had a convo earlier about this and its like... 04:52 [Apawcawlypse]: no i mean with nev 04:53 [Apawcawlypse]: in general 04:53 [Apawcawlypse]: we feel bad because you have no choice but to deal with ehr and kiera 04:53 [Apawcawlypse]: thats really sad 04:54 [Zadias]: Eh, don't worry about me 04:54 [Apawcawlypse]: i cant make your choices but i can sit here and tell you thats not a smart move being in a house where a female has control over you and who you talk to 04:54 [Apawcawlypse]: i do worry 04:54 [Apawcawlypse]: cant blame me for being a friend 04:55 [Zadias]: Technically I talk to who I want and I haven't spoken to Kiera in a couple days 04:55 [Zadias]: But I appreciate you worrying about me 04:55 [Apawcawlypse]: tbh if i was in your shoes id tell nev fuck off i will not talk to kiera and you cant force me to 04:55 [Apawcawlypse]: im sorry to be so harsh man 04:55 [Apawcawlypse]: i just feel really bad 04:55 [Apawcawlypse]: you dont need that shit in your life 04:56 [Apawcawlypse]: nev will find out how much of a bitch she is one day and drop her like a bad habbit 04:57 [Apawcawlypse]: me personally i dont have issues with nev.. but kiera is manipulating her 04:57 [Zadias]: Technically she'll probably stay with her - regardless of how much of a "bitch" she is until Kiera breaks up with her 04:57 [Zadias]: It was that way with Fallenstar too 04:57 [Apawcawlypse]: and nev needs to get tough and just boot kiera 04:57 [Apawcawlypse]: kiera knows shes using nev with healy 04:57 [Apawcawlypse]: ive seen it 04:57 [Apawcawlypse]: you have too 04:58 [Zadias]: Wait 04:58 [Apawcawlypse]: you cant sit here any deny that you know its happend 04:58 [Zadias]: I thought you said you didn't care about healy anymore 04:58 [Apawcawlypse]: i didnt say i didnt care, i know if i said anything nev wouldnt belive it anyways 04:58 [Apawcawlypse]: so i said idc she wont listen 04:59 [Zadias]: Eh, idk 04:59 [Apawcawlypse]: you told me neve didnt care anymore 04:59 [Apawcawlypse]: so that says enough 04:59 [Zadias]: Let's not talk about Nev it gets exhausting 04:59 [Apawcawlypse]: well im sorry but someone has to tell you this shit 04:59 [Apawcawlypse]: its obvious you know what i mean 05:00 [Apawcawlypse]: hell id straight up ignore kiera and not give a shit what nev says 05:00 [Zadias]: I've had plenty of people tell me these things 05:00 [Zadias]: I don't care really 05:00 [Apawcawlypse]: you are not her bf you dnt have to do what she says 05:00 [Zadias]: I'm going to be friends with Nev period 05:00 [Apawcawlypse]: im not saying nev im saying kiera 05:00 [Zadias]: If that means I also have to be neutral with Kiera - her mate - so be it 05:00 [Apawcawlypse]: dont let nev tell you its a choice you have to make 05:00 [Apawcawlypse]: thats where you ignore kiera 05:00 [Zadias]: I want Nev to be happy, she wants her best friend and mate to get along, I'm going to make the choice to do that 05:01 [Apawcawlypse]: so you let her control you 05:01 [Apawcawlypse]: you just said it 05:01 [Zadias]: I"m tired of every conversation we have end up having those two as a focus 05:01 [Zadias]: If that's going to continue I"m doing to remove and block you 05:01 [Apawcawlypse]: so you admit to letting her control you 05:02 [Zadias]: I admit to being done listening to you continously claim that 05:02 [Apawcawlypse]: i am not saying to leave nev im saying stop letting her tell you what to do 05:02 [Zadias]: I don't care 05:02 [Apawcawlypse]: -sigh- 05:03 [Apawcawlypse]: i just dont want to see you hurt again 05:03 [Zadias]: If you wanna be friends we can, but I"m not going to keep entertaining these talks and claims 05:03 [Apawcawlypse]: just know that is the only reason 05:03 [Zadias]: I will be hurt again, it's life, it's inevitable 05:03 [Zadias]: I don't care if I get hurt, I've been hurt a million times already 05:03 [Zadias]: I deal with it, I get over it, I move on 05:04 [Apawcawlypse]: well if kiera winds up fucking with you and you lose your home with nev i dont know what else to tell you 05:04 [Apawcawlypse]: thats a problem 05:04 [Zadias]: Bro\ 05:04 [Zadias]: I'm done 05:05 [Apawcawlypse]: im soryr to be point blank bud.. 05:05 [Apawcawlypse]: ill chill.. just dont ever feel like you did anything wrong 05:06 [Apawcawlypse]: where are you i will come sit with you alone and we will change the topic 05:06 [Zadias]: I'm gonna log, too stressed to deal with wow right now
Zaddy — Today at 5:24 AM Look, you don't know what's really going on, I've told you I'm tired of it and that I don't care, you obviously don't seem to listen, I gave you my warning and you failed to heed it. I'm sorry but I'm sticking to my best friend no matter how much I get annoyed with her, I will always stick with her. If you want to continue to talk bad about her and her mate, fine but I'm done. It was nice while it lasted but goodbye and I hope you have a good life.
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wickymicky · 3 years ago
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ive been feeling lately that im not sure i’ll ever transition. like idk if i’ll ever come out publicly. i dont want to. im certainly not ready for that now, and like partly because i still dont know what id even necessarily come out as. and its okay if i dont know, but obviously people are gonna ask. not everyone will think it’s okay if i don’t know, lol. and like.... idk. my friends will know. i’ll be me online, like here on this blog. but i’m not sure i’ll ever transition publicly. my sister is trans and is transitioning, on hormones, wearing clothes that express her gender better, that she never used to wear before, so she’s making a lot of changes and becoming happier for it. and going by her new name publicly now, which previously she wasn’t, i was one of the only people who knew it. but i can tell that that’s not me. 
whether i’m a girl or like none binary with left girl... either way... a transition for me wouldnt really involve changes to my physical appearance, except i guess taking hormones and shaving my face all the time instead of lazily letting my facial hair grow out even though i hate it and i think it looks and feels bad to have. but like... i wouldnt grow my hair out... i had long hair when i was in high school, longer than plenty of cis girls i was friends with haha. and eh, been there done that. no thanks. i dont wanna change how i dress because tbh i dress like... nothing. like really plain. the plainest things. and i wouldnt change that lol, i dont care. that’s a personality thing, not a gender thing. if i was born a cis girl, i feel like i would look exactly like i do now, dressing the same and with the same haircut. and on a cis girl, that might be very visibly queer haha, but.. i’m not a cis girl. so i dont even know what a transition would like... be. hormones i guess, but tbh i dont feel like they’d do a lot for me. 
testosterone makes afab people change in very noticeable ways, sometimes very fast, they start growing facial hair, building muscle differently, and their voices change. estrogen wouldnt change my voice, alter my overall shape all that much, or make facial hair stop growing. id get boobs i guess, but like, shrug, if that’s the only thing i would be doing it for, then it’s probably not what’s right for me. estrogen does make a lot of trans women feel a lot better about themselves and im not knocking that lol, i’m just talking about how this all pertains to me. top surgery for trans guys is relatively simple, they have a thing that they dont want and it can be removed relatively easily. i know it’s not actually easy, it’s expensive and hard to get and there’s always gonna be risk involved with stuff like that, but like compared to trans surgeries involving genitals, it’s a relatively simple one right? i think most trans guys who have top surgery dont necessarily have bottom surgery in any way, but just that first one, top surgery, makes such a noticeable visible difference and is a great weight off their shoulders, pun intended. im not interested in bottom surgery either, like, i mean im not wild about my thing, but im not interested in doing anything with that. but i dont have anything to chop off above my waist lmao, only things i think it would be neat if i had, haha. so basically what im saying is.... the list of changes i would even make to my physical appearance is like.... actually really small. and not because i love myself and am content with everything, cause im not. sigh. i just wish i had been born as a cis girl from birth. testosterone is too powerful and i wish it never ran amok through my body lmao, cause like i cant really undo all the stuff it did, not easily anyway. and the ways that we can undo those changes... arent things that i would be comfortable with. so im just left.... uncomfortable. that’s why trans guys transition so drastically... testosterone really fucks you up hahaha
hmmm. idk. i feel like the only thing a transition would really entail for me, at this stage in my life, is just people calling me Gwen in person. and using they/them or she/her, i guess. but i dont think i’m ready for that. that thought scares me. ive heard it sometimes in person, via my boyfriend (who is also trans, and transitioned before we started dating), and that can be nice, but i dont think im ready for my family or strangers to call me Gwen. i like it online because none of you know what i look like. i can be myself because none of you have preconceived notions about me... all you know is what you see when i say things online, which is great. in person though, im not sure im ready to handle the judgment and confused looks and suffer through every time someone goes “Wi- uh, i mean Gwen” like my mom still does with my sister. she’s trying, but she calls her her deadname like 50% of the time or more, and like i just.... idk. obviously she calls me my birthname too, because she doesnt even know my new name, but the fact that she doesnt know it means that it doesnt really bother me when she calls me my birthname. if she knew it, and said my deadname, even by accident, it would just be like... idk... a whole thing.... you know? i wouldnt correct her necessarily, not all the time anyway, but she might correct herself and idk that just seems like something i would feel really awkward experiencing, i dont think im ready for all that. especially cause like... and this is the big reason..................................... i dont feel like Gwen. not physically, anyway. i feel like Gwen when i’m online cause i can just *be* Gwen, but physically... if im in my room, by myself, it’s fine, but when i’m around people i *really* don’t feel like Gwen. because i havent transitioned i guess, but like... idk. i just really dont wanna draw too much attention to myself. i talk a lot on here, but i’m an anxious person, i’m shy, i’m very introverted, etc. 
idk, i think i had more to say, but this is just kind of a ramble, and i lost my train of thought. i think im done for now lol. i’m just venting. you dont need to message me and console me or anything, i’m not doing bad right now, i’m doing fine. i’m just thinking out loud. but im not distraught or whatever, dont worry haha. and this isnt stuff that it like hurt to admit... cause its stuff ive been thinking about for a long long time haha. so yeah dont worry, im okay. im just posting this because it helps to get thoughts out of your head, you know?
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mieczyhale · 5 years ago
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you know what i could go for?? [late night ramble journey ahead // i did not re-read this so who knows!!]
an in-depth fic about klaus’s ten months in vietnam.. but with ben there. klaus getting pants and a gun shoved at him and ben is just as confused and freaked out. klaus finding out where they are, or ben finding out and telling him. klaus meeting dave and ben is sitting next to him, side eyeing dave because who is this soldier and why did he come all the way from the back of the bus to introduce himself. ben sees it / can tell when klaus shoves the briefcase under their seat right after and ben’s just like ‘are you fucking kidding me??’ and of course klaus would make stupid decisions because of an attractive man with a sweet smile. so he’s exasperated but also concerned because it’s 1968 and people like klaus are treated even worse now than they are in 2019, way worse, and all of these men are probably straight - dave included. and if any of them are gay they’re not gonna say anything let alone act on it. it wouldn’t be worth it. klaus could get himself hurt or killed just for being himself, if he acts too.. well.. himself after that he stays by klaus’s side more than he did in their own time, which is really saying something. offers advice and wisdom like he always has. he warns him about snipers and mines and bullets and in turn klaus warns his squad. ben can’t lie - it feels pretty fucking good to be responsible for saving lives without having to take any. he still wishes klaus would just try the briefcase, he has it, but at some point he stops pushing. because he does think klaus needs to go back and soon but everytime he brings it up klaus gets defensive and angry - he can do what he wants. he has friends here now. he has a family that actually likes him. that actually cares. he’s considered useful and important and he’s on drugs!! he can get high and none of them think any less of him for it. why can’t ben see that maybe this is where he belongs?? maybe the middle of the fucking vietnam war is where he fits?? and it’s not like he has anyone or anything back home. the only thing he could have missed is ben and ben’s with him in 1968 so there’s literally nothing. and ben wants to yell back, he wants to argue that there’s plenty for klaus to go back to, but he’s realizing that klaus.. might be right. and that hurts. and of course pisses ben off but it hurts because nobody should have to travel back in time and fight in a pointless war to find basic respect, especially not klaus. klaus who has been through enough - who deserves good things more than anyone ben knows. so after that conversation he doesn’t bring it up anymore. he looks at it sometimes, and thinks about their siblings, how they just gained their missing brother only to lose another, how are they doing? have they noticed klaus is missing yet? did they see the motel room?? did they know that all of that blood was klaus’s?? (shh patch didn’t die, hazel and cha cha escaped by knocking her out but she lives because i said so. diego shows up and finds her, freaks out at first but is relieved that she’s fine. he manages to get her to wake up and she tells him that klaus was there. he was hurt, very very hurt, but he got away. she doesn’t know where he went, he crawled through the vent, and he’s gone, diego. you need to find him - he needs a hospital. ahem anyway) ben thinks on these things and it never takes him long to get disgusted looking at it because it contains, in a way, their family. and he thinks he knows the answers. he gets to a point where he decides he wouldn’t be upset if they never had to see those jackasses again. his loyalties lie with klaus, after 13 years together there’s no way they wouldnt be. and if doing what’s best for klaus, doing what makes klaus happy, is staying right where they’ve found themselves than he can deal with it. that’s where he ends up anyway but its definitely not a quick or easy point to reach. he’s there for every battle, all the days of marching, watching klaus kill people and knowing how badly it’s affecting his brother and yet he doesn’t stop. he doesn’t pull back without orders, doesn’t put his gun down until he knows his squad is safe. and that fierceness grows as he gets closer to dave. ben doesn’t know what to think of dave at first, probably doesn’t trust him - knowing every man klaus has ever found attractive or had a “relationship” with before - but ben literally watches this - admittedly handsome - soldier boy fall in love with klaus, and klaus with him. ben witnesses the disco. the private conversation - from a distance, he’s doesn’t feel quite right listening in and he can still see them. the way they look at each other. how gently dave approaches every moment with klaus - the hand on his cheek, their first kiss (which he WILL tease klaus about later) when they head back to the hotel that was booked for all the guys for r&r, ben decides to wander saigon instead because he’s pretty sure he knows where things are going to go considering klaus and dave are roommates (oh my god they were roommates) by the time he gets back they’re both passed out (in the same bed. as he expected) from that day forward klaus is happy, genuinely happy in a way ben can’t remember him ever being, and dave has of course gained ben’s full approval (especially when klaus tells dave about the ghosts and dave believes him. even turns to where klaus is pointing at ben and tells ben that he’s happy that klaus has at least one good sibling, that he’s happy to know ben is there. when dave knows ben is there he always greets him. it’s not anything that grand really but it means a lot to ben. and when klaus finally tells him about the time travel, a little later on, dave believes him then too. said it made sense because he always thought there was no way someone as incredible as klaus could’ve come from the same place as he himself - let alone the same time. it never seemed to.. fit) SO ben is a fan. and he stays by both their sides - keeping them alive as best he can - along with a few other ghosts who are coherent, previous members of the 173rd, who pass things on to ben when klaus is too high. they talk, as long as no one but dave is around - dave who adapts pretty easily to klaus holding a whole conversation with someone he can’t see or hear. and ben.. stays ben. the only thing being in the war really changes is the way he views their siblings and he now has one other live person that he can “talk” to. eventually, almost 11 months in, they find out they’re getting sent to the frontlines. even closer to the danger. and klaus has a bad feeling. this is when ben brings up the briefcase again, hesitantly, and before klaus goes off reminds him that they could take dave with them. if he wanted to go. klaus can return to their time, to relative safety, and still have dave. it’s no longer a ‘one or the other’ situation. all they have to do is get dave to say ‘yes’. he says it very quickly of course (if you think i’d let dave die you’re out of your goddamn mind) he can be tough and feral when he needs to be, when pushed if klaus is in danger but he isn’t a killer, he doesn’t want to be a killer, he wants out. but he also wants a life with klaus and while they talked about going back to the states in.. well.. dave’s time and getting a little house and all that - doing that in 2019 sounds much better. especially after the night klaus told him softly about how things were different for lgbtq+ people, how they could hold hands and be as out as they wanted. get married. adopt. all things dave spent his whole life believing he’d never be allowed to have. so they do it - right then. klaus pulls out the briefcase and they gather the few things they wanted to keep and in a bright light they’re gone. (maybe they said something, or goodbye, to each squadmate before leaving. maybe they didnt and it hurt but if they waited around to get through everyone it would be too late to run) AND OH!! they take the ghost soldiers with them / the ghost soldiers find them in 2019, because i’m a slut for klaus having good ghosts, friend ghosts, who - even if they died horribly, are still the same person they were alive. and maybe sometimes they look like their deaths and sometimes they can look normal - ben teaching the soldiers how to be ghosts?? including how to appear as you were; whole, no holes or blood or missing limbs or chunks of head blown off. they’re all grateful and so is klaus. tho listen: he still gets high because i fucking said so - however, at least until the world is saved, he sticks to cigarettes and - for sleeping purposes - pot, dave does as well. because dave isnt a square. maybe he sticks to that path afterwards. maybe not. i for one support everything except 100% sobriety 100% of the time in this instance  anyway: later on when klaus can make ben corporeal for any amount of time he wants ben tells their siblings about the real life romantic drama he got to watch close up, from their first meeting all the way to the return to 2019. he also mentions a lot of things about the war, the sights and sounds of senseless murder - something their brother and his boyfriend were forced to take part in - the wounds they had to deal with, heal through. klaus and dave definitely have some scars. the fear. and that’s after telling them about hazel and cha cha and the almost two days they had klaus and nobody noticed. (maybe klaus lets his siblings meet the other soldiers, maybe not. maybe he lets them wander the mansion corporeal to scare the shit out of people. who knows) ben wants to make their siblings feel bad. he wants them to hurt and feel guilty. it’s the very least they deserve he thinks, when it’s all said and done. he hasn’t been able to say anything to them for 13 years and he’s got a lot of things built up - but gotta say, the last year (five-ish days?? starting at ep.1) have really taken the whole goddamn cake. klaus is embarrassed and shocked and actually quite touched that little benny is really going feral for the first time - though he keeps trying to tell him none of it is a big deal. he doesnt like confrontation. dave however is extremely pleased by the whole thing. klaus kept saying he and ben would get along if they ever got to meet and he was right. ben had, with a serious face, dubbed them the klaus hargreeves love & protection squad (bc dave doesnt know what the fuck even a ‘meem’ is yet) and that’s that. they make up a handshake and everything. klaus has never felt so loved. 
aaand eventually klaus and dave and ben (because of course he’s invited) do get that little house away from the city - someplace with few to no ghosts. someplace they can make their home. they make sure it has a room they can make up for ben even though he doesnt sleep (he still deserves his own space. a place to get away from them if he wants. somewhere to put his books and such. ben doesnt get emotional about that at all. absolutely not.) and they get pets and klaus gardens and ben reads books about gardening so he can help and dave works (mechanic is always a good time. or bookstore owner!! coffee shop?? listen. those may or may not be my favorite aus) and maybe the siblings get to visit and maybe they mend things and bond or whatever idk THE POINT IS:: Ben is a good brother and i think the idea of him going through vietnam with klaus is interesting and if someone with more ideas/thoughts ever wrote this i would be on that like cheese on broccoli honestly. THE SECOND POINT IS:: Klaus and Dave deserve to be happy and have the life they dreamed about together and if they shared their home with anyone it would be the Bentacles SO… OKAY…  that definitely did it’s own thing but i really really genuinely love thinking about what those months would have been like with ben there - what he would have thought or said or done about things yknow?? and how that would have affected klaus/changed things. i didnt give a lot of examples in this because my brain didn’t want to stay on track (as if it ever does) but it’s 1:30 in the morning and im so fucking tired lsdfd;lk if you actually read this.. first of all: im sorry. second of all: thank you. and literally if anyone ever wrote something about this topic (not like.. this post specifically, just the ben in vietnam plot) and nobody important dies i’ll love you and give you a lil smooch on the noggin  s m ooch. smooches. you know who likes smooches?? klaus. you know who deserves smooches?? klaus. you know who’s getting smooches?? THAT’S RIGHT. KLAUS. because dave has a degree in giving them and he can’t let that education go to waste amiright??
this post.. may or may not have been brought to you by wine as well.. 
ope
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sweater-daddiesdumbdork · 5 years ago
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hi💕 did you get my ask yesterday? anyway it’s okay if you didn’t, i just got another idea because i’m feeling shitty today, what about chris and you liking each other but you don’t want to say anything because you don’t feel worthy of him so when he insinuates you just dismiss him and he thinks you don’t like him like super angsty but happy ending?
This one was fun, I hope I got that bit of angsty feel to it, while keeping it light hearted. If he ever told me he had feelings for me, I would be all adkfjakldfjqier HOT MESS. Lol. If you like this kind of theme, @jtargaryen18 has a great chapter one with this feel called Jealous Guy with Chris x Reader. Its so good! 
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You looked at Chris as you popped open his fridge, and stuck your head in. “Buddy, if you are out of beer before this bbq even begins, can we even call it a bbq?” Straightening and looking at the thread bare shelves, you arch a brow. Did he even eat?
“Its out in the garage Y/N, trust me I know better then not to have beer.” He rolls his eyes at you, making burger patties and setting them on a platter, a splash of Worcester sauce, salt, pepper. Yea good enough. You make your way to the garage through the kitchens side door and grab two bottles. Okay, thats better. He had a full fridge in the garage, as well as the extras to bring out into the back yard when they go to set up.
Going back in, you make sure the door is firmly shut, outside was sweltering already, and you considered the idea that you all maybe should have extra ice on hand. “Yes I got plenty of ice to” Chris says with a grin as he rips off some saran wrap and covers the burgers before handing you the platter to place into his fridge.
“I promise, I only asked you here to hang out. I got all the rest covered." Chris moved to wash his hands and you hip check the fridge shut.
"Okay! Okay! I give! I'm here.... Only as a guest...."
He paused, knowing it was coming.
".... Who feels like she should help you get ready."
That earned you a hand towel being chucked at you, the two of you laughing as you both headed out to his patio, calling Dodger to join you two, and Chris snagged his sunglasses while waiting for his pup to join you two.
The two of you has been best friends for many years, it was an easy going, no expectation kinda deal. There we're times, you wanted to take it further, you knew those little over the top things he did privately for his girlfriend's, after all you had helped him brainstorm a few of them. But they were never for you, always the best friend, you weren't complaining. You valued this, but you wondered what it could have been like.
You were out of his league anyways, you knew that, he knew that. Life is what it is. These were your thoughts on the subject.
But the past year he pulled back from that scene. Seemed to focus on himself, what he wanted to accomplish after his Marvel stint. You had asked him a couple times if he was seeing anyone. Chris would just kind of shrug, become elusive in his answers. "He, I'm to busy"
Somehow you would never catch his glance your way when you would go back to what you were doing. He was not to busy, he was conflicted.
You were his best friend. He didn't want to ruin one of his most valued relationships by asking for more. Even if it could be the best thing in his life.
"When's everyone supposed to get here?" You ask, as you move over to sit on the edge of his in ground pool. Kicking off your flip flops and lowering to dip your toes in, and sinking your leg in as you sat down, careful with the glass bottle. He loped over next to you, already barefoot, he lowered next to you and took a drag before he set it next to yours.
"Couple hours yet, although Scott and Zach will probably be by sooner."
"They are so damn cute" you remarked, having just met Scotts boyfriend a few weeks ago when you were invited to a party they were throwing
Chris chuckled softly, watching Dodger on the other side of the pool, rubbing himself in the freshly cut grass, staining his white fur green. "They really are, and Scotts so happy, probably the happiest ive seen him in a long time." You picked up on that wistful note, glancing over at him and let your shoulder nudge him. "Did I just hear a note of longing Christopher, Mr. I like being a bachelor?"
You were only teasing, but he looked thoughtful at you, blue eyes scanning over your face, and you felt that all familiar tingle flushing the tops of your cheeks. Damn it y/n, check yourself woman.
"Well maybe, yea. I would like something more then the occasional fling, and just sex. But I'm not sure she be interested in me like that. We've never discussed it, and shes never necessarily hinted in more then what we got."
You, so completely not picking up on what he was really saying, cause in your mind, he couldn't ever be into you. "Well doofus, you have to tell her. Come on, your a catch Chris. Any woman would be happy with you, and with luck, she will make you happy to." You tipped back your bottle, the icy cold beer tingling your lips in that delicious way, your tongue would swipe along your bottom lip, Chris trying to keep himself from getting to distracted.
Playing with the neck of his bottle, he sloshed it a bit, and then set it aside before taking a drink from it. “Okay, I will. Y/N, what do you say, would you like to go out on a date with me?” You just about choked on your beer, sputtering and he reached over to tap his hand against your back. “Jesus Christ woman, breath!”
“You-you want to go out, with me? why in the world would you want to...?” Your voice drifted off, and Chris arched his brows, reaching out to take your hand, which you let him. Still shocked at his question.
“Really Y/N? You cant really be questioning why? Ive known you for years. We have fun together, you already know about all the risks that come to dating me. Youve never, wondered about what it would be like for us? Cause I have many times.”
“Well yea Chris, I mean... ive noticed, dont get me wrong. But im me... your you, it just...” You gave a shrug, not really wanting to say those words. Chris tilted his head, blue eyes searching for what you werent exactly spitting out, and shook his head.
“I dont get what you mean Y/N, what does that have to do with anything?”
“Come on Chris”pulling back your hand, you splashed your leg a bit while drawing it out, and wrapping your arm around it as you bent it, watching the water run down to the tips of your toes, suddenly they were fascinating, you could really just watch those droplets race away all day then to answer Chris’s question. But he wasnt backing down, and you could feel his incredibly blue in the sunshine, im innocent but also know what Im doing to you babes, eyes fucking staring at you. “You are so out of my league, Ive seen the woman youve dated in the past.”
Taken aback, his brows furrowed in frustration. “Thats bullshit Y/N, you think I would think anyone wouldnt deserve me cause I happen to make movies?” He went silent, contemplating what he wanted to say next. The fact that you felt that way about yourself just proved that he was going to have to show you how incredible you were. “Just a chance Y/N, if you have any feelings for me. Its all I ask for.” Turning back to you, he dipped his head to hover near yours.
Waiting for you to give an answer, your heart race cause he was that close. You could feel the soft breaths of air coming from his soft breaths and your eyes darted to those full lips, making your own throb with wanting to brush against them. But hes your friend, your mind screams and then a soft whisper. But he can be so much more.
It was all interrupted when Scott called from inside the house, and you pulled away, scooting back and moving to a stand, grabbing the emptied beer bottles. It was an excuse to get away from what you actually wanted to say. “Let me grab us another!” Racing away to go greet Scott, Chris lets his head falls into his hands, groaning. I was so close, and scared you away.
Scott busted through the door to find Chris pulling himself to a stand, catching the drawn look he had, he tilted his head “Out with it, I know that look, and thats the one you use when something is bugging you.”
“Nothing is wrong Scott” Chris lied, Dodger promptly coming over to greet his “uncle”, in which Scott immediately ruffled his ears. Not to be distracted though, he gave another spill it motion.
“Okay, if you MUST know Scott, I might have told Y/N I had feelings for her.”
Scotts eyes widened, and he grinned. “Well its about damn time Chris! You two have been dancing around each other for a year. Even Zach said we should just push you two together to kiss.”
“Yea well, it didnt go as I hoped.” His hand went up to the back of his neck, rubbing it. “She feels shes not in the same league? How is that even a worry.”
Scott shrugged and loped his arm over his brothers shoulder. “Hey, shes probably just nervous and caught her by surprise. Talk to her again after the party, and relax bro. Trust in your gut.” Chris wrinkled his brow as he listened to Scott, he made some good points. It was unexpected after all. He had certainly never hinted it before at you that he had any real interests. “Come on, let go see what those two are up to and finish setting up.”
Inside, you and Zach were dicing up some fruit they had brought for a fruit salad, having avoided bringing Chris that second beer, and Chris didnt remark on it once they came back inside. He smiled over at you and you glanced down right quick, moving to drop the strawberries in. Was it going to be awkward? Fuck you hoped not. But to your relief, there was no change. Everyone fell into an easy chatter, Chris went and started his grill, and before you all knew it, the party was underway with people showing up, bringing more food, games were played and most likely to much beer got consumed.
The evening started winding down, and you bid your goodbyes, touching Chris’s arm “So im going to head out, it was a great time, dont forget to drink some water before bed though. You will wake up with a headache.” A frown plays on his lips.
“Wait, your really leaving? I thought we could talk.” His eyes flashed hopeful at you, and honestly right now it was all more then you wanted to get into.
“Yea, I got an early morning and stuff I need to take care of.” White lies werent harmful, right?
“How about I come over tomorrow then?” He was still trying, one thing about Chris, once he set his mind to something, he rarely backed down.
“Text you, I promise!” You say a bit overly cheerfully and dart out the door, leaving him on his own once more. Digging out your keys, you escape to your car and pull out of his drive. Driving around, you ended up going nowhere near home, instead you drove around, trying to process your thoughts.
Why couldnt you Y/N? Dont you deserve some kind of happiness and youve always been attracted to him. Just always putting yourself down, you did that with your ex to. Here Chris was saying he had feelings beyond just friends and you ducked out the door before telling him that you might have as well for years.
This was how it went for a couple hours, getting dark you turned on your head lights, and before you realized where you were, your car pulled into Chris’s driveway, tapping your fingers on the wheel. His lights were still on, but everyones cars were gone. Were you really going to do this? Yes... Yes you are. Y/N, you have someone who wants to see if you two are meant to be something more, someone you actually care for as well. Stop holding back.
Going up the front steps, you consider letting yourself in, but you simply knock instead, twisting your fingers together. Dodgers bark emits, and you can hear Chris on the other side. “Hush boy, its okay. Back up buddy.” And then the click, he opened his door and a quirk of a smile folds up the corner of his mouth. “Hey.... “ You take a deep breath and step up to him, grasping his face in your hands, and sweep up to your toes to reach him. Why he have to be ridiculously tall? The sharp taste of beer and him flooded your senses, and his arm tilted around to brace you in close, holding back enough so you could control this kiss, it was yours, and he wasnt about to scare you off again.
Pulling back, you smooth your hands down to his shoulders, clearing your throat. “First of all, Chris you know I dont want to loose our friendship, second I want to see how good we could be. And third...”
Suddenly Scott appeared in the background, grinning wide. Apparently he didnt leave. “ITS ABOUT TIME YOU TWO!!!”
Cats out of the bag, you and Chris were going to see where this would go.
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ghostphoenix-kry · 5 years ago
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k so ur always tagging goofy shit w lilith or amelia, so like i wanna know their deal, like give me a whole info dump
My friend, I will gladly dump some of my shit on them out for you,,, these two are particular favorites along with Sol. Also I am so sorry this turned out so long and so incoherent. I couldnt figure out what all to say about them and I forgot some of the things I could say about them.
Its really long.
I'll start off with the standard Lilith for now.
Lilith is a French musician and criminal in the Cowboy Times that are Red Dead Redemption. A woman with a lot of pride and an inability to take anyone's shit.
She grew up a single child with parents that firmly believed she needed to form herself to their ideas of life. She needed to be as perfect as possible to them and to her future husband. She needed to learn to be the ideal wife or she would fail in life. For years she tried to live up to their expectations but it was never enough and it wasnt healthy at all, so she got fed up with it and left home.
Out there in the 'real world' she developed a talent for musical performance and found out the hard way that relationships are painful and sketchy at best. After falling for the charms and promises of countless pretty faces and kind smiles, the lies coated in sweet words claiming love and devotion, she realized that people lie a lot. And that there were too many pompous men that seemed to think themselves entitled to nightly affection and heart, only to take it and fuck off with it.
Granted, she understood that it was naivety on her end and a want to feel some sense of being wanted that got her there. After a while of hoping the next time would be different and having it end up just the same, she decided she was done. A coldness had begun to sink in then, a hatred and bitterness towards the idea of folks flirting with her or attempting to pull the wool over her eyes with falsified affection.
So, Lilith said fuck this noise, and decided that if those rich and disloyal men were so sure of themselves and their worth to her, that she would use it. She would lean into it while remaining distant.
She would learn to lie incredibly well.
So she did just that. She performed as always, but it wasnt about the pocket change people would give her. Now she would seek out those pompous rich bastards herself, using tactics to suggest interest and letting them decide it was an invitation. Only to leave with them at night and leave them ass up in a ditch, their wallets now marginally lighter, and their faces a bit less perfect.
She became a temptress and a thief. And she became powerful and proud. Travelling from town to town in order to escape the law, she continued her performances and acts, targeting more unfortunate men with a momentous burden being in their wallet.
This said, she isn't inherently bitter towards everyone. But she definitely composes herself with an air of undeniable authority around other people. Essentially a vibe that for the most part tells people not to try anything or they will find her hands in their face before they can catch them.
Within a few small groups, her guard is lowered and she allows herself to be more relaxed though. Letting her usage of French slip out along with her humor and need to be earning her keep and helping out. She is used to being alone, so she wants to contribute somehow to anyone she might be staying with in order to convince herself and others that she is indeed helping. Look! I am doing work! Please let me stay! Usually these are the people she grows fond of and will protect with terrifying ferocity.
She is also at times though, a little bit dumb of ass. Lilith is fluent in French and in English, but there are words still in English that she thinks she knows but does not. For instance she gets confused by the names for baby animals and is quite convinced that quite a few baby animals are just -insert animal name- + "ling" (Piglings, chickenlings, gooselings, etc) In the times her inner idiot shows, she will get very flustered and embarrassed. She feels she is supposed to be smooth and intimidating afterall. Not to mention formal.
Also while she has very much given up on recieving love from another, and is quite against the prospect of a relationship, she does still catch feelings for people on occasion. And it always kind of scares her. But an affectionate or fond Lilith is an incredibly soft one that has a lot of love to give but is a bit hesitant to give it.
Lass is also very maternal in nature, even despite being a bit pissy. She wants to protect.
TLDR; Lilith Streith is bitter French musician and thief who does not trust getting close to men, but does find that the nice ones who are respectful are really super cool and she likes them a lot.
Amelia Alexi on the other hand, is quite the opposite.
Miss Alexi is a Grade-A gunslinger and mercenary in the Cowboy Times, a very annoyed and fed up deputy in FarCry, a S.T.A.R.S. agent that's too willing to fight literally anything in Resident Evil, and overall, a professional pun-slinging dumbass with sleep and trust issues.
I'm going to go with Cowboy Times storyline and traits because it's a bit better thought out at this time.
Amelia grew up with a brother and her parents, all of which she was very close with. She was brought up in a musical family, and a family that was very keen on the idea of being kind and doing what is right. They hunted and grew a good majority of their food, but were well enough liked by the nearby town too. They were good folks that helped a lot of people.
In a series of quite unfortunate events, some of which inadvertantly brought on by herself, Amelia found herself alone, wanted by the law for murder, and riddled with guilt and wrath. Her parents having disappeared on her and her brother, only for her brother to be executed for a crime she committed.
The law failed her brother big time, the judge having said guilty with little to no evidence of her brother's involvement. And seeming how it was her crime, she is so hurt and angered by his death. Wrath builds in her rather quickly, and she takes it out on those who caused it, killing off those crooked men of the law in a fury before stealing a horse and bolting, killing off any pursuers who come too close.
Those mental wounds continue to fester and her rage ends up directed towards the law as an entirety. They are liars and snakes. And if they want to come after her now, she won't hesitate to send them back to their maker.
Despite her resolve, she finds herself faced with nightmares and visions a plenty. Nightmares that startle her awake and leave her in tears. Nightmares about her brother's death, and the death's of so many others she has and hasn't met. They are painful and terrifying to her, so she soon decides the only way to avoid them would be to avoid the medium they come across, sleep.
Thus the first of her horrible care habits begins as Amelia cuts out sleep. Avoiding it at any cost, which soon enough weighs on her and causes a bit of paranoia. Constantly fatigued and constantly on high-alert, she somehow manages to retain her gun-slinging abilities and sharp senses for the most part, but unfortunately finds that her body will forcibly shut down on her and make her black out when it decides its had enough. Usually in rather unfortunate times and places.
The back of her horse
In the middle of a field
In a chair
In a tree
In the middle of cleaning her weapons
All over the place. Not ideal, but she is a surprisingly lucky lass, and nobody goes looking for a killer and expecting her to be passed out in the middle of the road.
Anyway, back to important stuff.
Due to the reputation she gains amongst the law, she finds herself being lassoed into a rather sketchy group of people. A den of vipers, men and women with guns and knives to lend. She finds herself in a guild of mercenaries, run by one Mama Morgen. The Queen of the den.
Amelia is soon enough stuck with the den, being called out to snuff out lives in return for money as well as assurance that Mama Morgen wouldnt turn those hired weapons on her for knowing too much.
While Amelia is usually apathetic anymore, too tired and done with life to care about others and too sure to keep her distance to get close enough to care, she is still a sweet hearted little woman. A lonely one, a tired and jaded one, but a sweet one.
She has odd habits and a sense of humor, finding some amusement in shitty jokes and some peace in playing a nice music piece on her violin. Her fury is strong, but it remains directed at those who wronged her so badly in the past. People aren't inherently bad, she can get along well enough with people, as she has retained her old kindness.
When she is comfortable with someone, she too tends to grow fond and protective of them. While she is far less maternal in nature, she doesnt want her friends to feel any kind of pain or anguish. To her they are deserving of the best and only the best, so she works hard to keep them free of danger or stress. To cheer them up and make them laugh when they do find themselves stressed or hurt. Within the short leddy, there is a lot of care to provide for those that she thinks have earned it.
Amelia can also be a bit sassy and dumb of ass as well. And proves it frequently. Any possible feelings she may catch are not registered as feelings until it hits her like a brick when she realizes that cuddling and snoozing with a person on a nightly basis is not a thing most people do when they're just friends. And trying to do horse tricks and cool stunts in front of a person to impress them is not entirely normal either.
Also, she does a lot of stunts. Miss Alexi is fond of two things: The warmth of a thousand suns, and The Thrill. Has on multiple occasions jumped off of cliffs in order to land in the water below, especially when being pursued. Though she does enjoy being pursued as well, especially in a rather cruel way when it's the law pursuing her.
She is intelligent as a person, but her common sense isn't always present and she is likely to crack a joke or impulsively steal things at inopportune times. There is little impulse control.
She is alive because of luck, spite, and an uncanny ability to shoot really quickly. Nothing more.
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normal-thoughts-official · 5 years ago
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Since no one talks about it and everyone is hellbent over "good parent Asmodeus" I wanna know your take on the abuse and manipulation asmodeus did on Magnus... Both before the show timeline and during it it is a simple request no pressure hbhby
hoo boy okay let's buckle up for this i guess. warning for emotional, psychological and physical child abuse ahead everybody, stay safe
seriously im halfway through writing this answer now and this got very very dark so like if these are triggering to you, please skip this one
okay so as all abusers i think that asmodeus was a master at using Magnus' previous trauma, ie his mum's and stepfather's death, against him. Magnus had just lost the person he loved most, almost been murdered, and killed his abuser, as well as losing everything - he couldn't support himself and i have the feeling that he was so terrified after his stepfather's murder, so convinced he was a monster for it, hell, he still is even in show canon, he might have just fled. and then we have a homeless Magnus living on the streets, guilty and terrified and utterly alone
and he's convinced that his mum's death is his fault, his stepfather told him so, said he was a monster, a demon, and that's why she had killed herself. and then he murdered his stepfather, thus, in his head, becoming the exact monster his mum feared. his mum was right. he was a monster. a murderer. a demon. he was everything he feared and she hated him and she was right to hate him, too-
and i think asmodeus deliberately waited until he was at his limit to show up. i mean he's gotta have been keeping tabs on Magnus, he was his all powerful son after all, his heir, his weapon. there's no way asmodeus didn't know exactly what was happening, and i think that he deliberately waited until Magnus was within an inch of his life, exhausted, starving, almost depleted of magic, shivering and cold and crying alone on the street, before showing up. so Magnus wouldnt question him. so Magnus would feel indebted to him. so Magnus would feel like he needs him
and when he does rescue Magnus, boy, he makes this whole show of taking him somewhere safe, giving him plenty of water and endless food, covering him in blankets and getting him nice feeling clothes, cleaning him - just the most and best of everything, to really emphasize the difference, really make it seem terrifying to ever be away from him again, when clearly, without him, he was nothing
and asmodeus would have explained it all to him, say that his stepfather was right, he was a demon, like asmodeus was. Magnus would be so scared, "he tried to kill me," and he'd be almost flippant about it, "oh, mundanes. it's what they do. they hate us." he'd thwarp what happened with the stepfather deeply in Magnus' head, make it seem like his stepfather's abusive behavior was normal, just what they always did, and that magnus' anger over it, his righteous anger, born of fear, and the need to survive, was an overreaction. the proof of his demonic heritage - of the evil inside of him. proof that he was the same as asmodeus, that he should turn his back to his humanity
and Magnus is confused, and hurt, and scared, because simultaneously his stepfather was bad and tried to kill him and that is proof that he can't trust mundanes and that asmodeus is all he has- but he also didn't hurt Magnus all the other times before, he never mistreated him, all these times he hit him or his mum and called them dirty and disgusting, no, that was nothing much, that was normal. it was magnus' anger that was out of place, proof that he was a monster, was a demon, was like asmodeus. should stay with him
we know that asmodeus wanted Magnus because with his magic he could have even stronger power blah blah blah so im guessing that asmodeus' plan was basically to train Magnus, bring him to his side, wait until he was mature and strong, and then try to defeat Lilith? so for that to have you know not happened Magnus would have to have banished him when he was still a kid, but anyway, that's another can of worms and I'll get to that (probably)
so he needs to turn Magnus away from the mundane world, make him want to come to edom, possibly convince him that he cant be happy in edom because Lilith wont help him, and then have him kill Lilith? and so he has to convince Magnus that mundanes are bad, going to hurt him, and that he doesnt belong with them, and so that's the narrative that he builds, normalizing his stepfathers' behavior, reminding him that even his mum didnt love him, because he wasn't a person, wasnt human, and they'd never love him as he was, and he didn't love them, either. no matter how much magnus' heart ached for his mum, and his friends, and his dukun tutor, asmodeus kept telling him that he didn't love them, couldn't have, because he was a demon, and they were beneath him. and if Magnus asked too many questions, got too confused, fought that idea too much, he'd lash out, scream, almost burn Magnus wirh the terrible dark fire of his magic
and Magnus was terrified and would hide, and he'd be like, oh, my little thing, I'd never hurt you, don't you see? that was just my magic, of course i wouldnt hurt you, im not like them. and then hed hug a trembling, shaking Magnus, who had no idea what was real anymore
eventually this started to intertwine with ideas of royalty too - you are too good for them, Magnus, you are a royal, you have a right to everything your heart desires, and they treated you like trash. you have to forget these stupid mundanes. they're beneath you
and he definitely made Magnus kill/hurt more people, possibly threatened him, said that he needed to get stronger, to stop caring so damn much, because Magnus has always been kind, and eager to help, and ultimately good, and asmodeus needed to destroy that. so he pushed and pushed him, told him that he was weak if he didnt do what asmodeus said, and that asmodeus would do it himself. that he'd leave him again, and how would that be, huh, being homeless again, would his precious mundanes have mercy? would they care? no, they'd leave him to die and spit on his face, and yet here he was, pitying them. like a whiny, weak baby, not the royal asmodeus expected him to be
and if Magnus still didn't quite manage to satisfy asmodeus, because he took too long, cried too much, pleaded too much- then he'd get punished. i think that punishment came basically in the form of magic depletion/exhausting him. Magnus is freakishly good at holding back from magic depletion, has sustained his magic and pushed way past his limits many times throughout the show, sometimes for full uninterrupted minutes. i think thats why. because asmodeus "trained" him to be able to, with his punishments
he possibly used that as an excuse - since you insist on being so weak, we have to make you stronger. so he'd make Magnus use his magic for hours at a time, no breaks, until he was shaking and trembling and crying with the effort, and then he'd leave him depleted and exhausted and have him recover on his own. that's what you are without magic, he'd tell him. nothing. do you understand now? why you can never be like them? do you want to end up like this for the rest of your life? I worry about you, Magnus, i really, really do. kill this stupid sentimentalist mundane side, before it kills you.
Magnus said, without magic, i feel like i dont matter. And don't get me wrong, i think the show made it pretty clear that magic is a part of warlocks, that without it they are incomplete, unhappy. but the fact that he specifically said i feel like i dont matter makes me feel like this is something that asmodeus drilled into his head. without magic he was nothing. and he really wasnt, because that's all asmodeus wanted him for
magicless Magnus? asmodeus despised him. for the whole time he was recovering from the magic depletion, asmodeus could barely spare him a glance. he was cruel about it, too. what? aren't you happy that you're like these mundanes you love so much? I'm just treating you as such. and then, when his magic started to come back, when he managed to do a trick- asmodeus would change completely. smile wide. hug him. that's my boy! and it would seem like asmodeus loved him, and everything would seem okay. when he had magic, he mattered, he was important, and asmodeus loved and took care of him. when he didn't, asmodeus wouldnt even touch him, wouldnt want to eat with him, would barely talk to him
so the prospect of losing his magic was terrifying, and sometimes Magnus would plead with him, please, dad, no training, i promise to be good, i dont want to be without my magic. and asmodeus would say why are you so worried? it's just training. and Magnus would say, because i always end up without magic. and asmodeus would snap, well, you aren't supposed to, do you think I'd push you over your limit on purpose? you were supposed to be able to handle it, but you aren't, you're weak. why do you think i get so disappointed? i want you to be strong, Magnus, like you're meant to be
that was always what he said, too, in canon. when he gave Magnus his pretzel, he said, for your strength. he didn't care if Magnus was well, or happy, or if he fucking liked pretzels. only that he was strong. and that is definitely a trope here
anyway! at this point asmodeus is already telling him about going to edom, about how he'll be safer there, away from people, happier. and Magnus is terrified, because he doesn't want to be away. he loves people, and most of them arent bad. he loves food. he loves music, and art, and architecture. he loves seeing the world. he loves learning languages and seeing new animals and plants and cultures. he doesn't want to be away from the world. he doesn't want to be with asmodeus
and asmodeus, of course, has carefully kept from him that other warlocks exist, that theres a warlock community out there, because if he knew that, then he'd have an alternative to being with asmodeus, even with his whole mundanes will always hate you blah blah blah speech. but there's only so long he could keep this from Magnus, right? he can feel other people's magic through the ley lines, they can feel his. it was only a matter of time.
i think it was ragnor, honestly, the first one he met. ragnor who told him, kid, there's a life out there, we're alive and we're many and we're happy, and we're there for each other. there's an alternative. and Magnus could cry with relief, because he didn't want to be with his dad anymore, but he was so terrified of being alone and on his own again
so he throws himself into studying, telling asmodeus that he wants to know about demonic magic to go to edom. and he learns about his weaknesses, and what a banishment is, and how to do it. and so when he's about to hit his maturity, he tells asmodeus he wants to visit. and because portals dont exist yet, he has to make this whole elaborate thing- and he tricks asmodeus, sets a trap, i dont know, and instead of simply taking them there, he banishes asmodeus, and stays
and so he goes and finds that weird british old man, and asks him if he can go to the warlocks' place. and ragnor chuckles and tells him that the world is the warlocks' place, that they're everywhere, that he'll teach him. and so he takes Magnus to meet other warlocks, and join the community, and start working. he still loves mundanes, and plus, after all the bad he feels he's done for them, he wants to help. so he lives among them and makes friends with them and dates them and works among them and gets wealthy, and grows, and he's somewhat happy, even if most of the time he has to hide what he is, even if he still feels lonely and bad and like a monster, a killer, a demon. but he got rid of him, and he can, maybe, become something else, if he tries really hard to find his humanity again, and make up for his mistakes, and the pain he's caused
i think asmodeus is responsible for most of the guilt Magnus feels, for a great part of his immortality blues - after all, thats what most clearly separates him from mundanes, makes him different, unable to be a part of their world - and for his feelings that hes a monster. he tells alec he hopes alec doesn't think less of him because of his father, because a part of him still believes that being asmodeus' son makes Magnus like him. he says he's ugly and dark, because asmodeus convinced that's all he could ever be. he has a huge resistance and pain/exhaustion tolerance because of course he does. and he tries to sacrifice himself all the time because hes convinced that he doesnt matter and doesn't belong, that no one would miss him because they cant love him, because hes different. and that was all definitely planted on him by asmodeus, and later watered by camille ofc
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czechforrain · 4 years ago
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Caught up to the RWBY manga...and I’ve got opinions
CW / TW : Some discussions of implied sexual assault. 
Spoilers up to Ch 18 of the RWBY Manga and Vol 2 of the series TV show. 
So last time I commented on the manga I was just past the white fang thing with blake and I responded idk interested in how the manga took it’s approach with it. I wouldnt say positive but curious about it in a harmless way. 
THINGS REALLY FELL OFF THE RAILS. 
The manga basically speeds through the rest of volume two leaving behind major scenes and shortening the rest to where the impact of them is almost completely diminished. There are also some character differences that bear out due to the author giving people more or less focus.
The biggest changes are with Yang and Blake’s relationship. Now even if you dont like BEES, the formation of their friendship is a vital part of the show. Someone can read everything as “just friends” but them having a close relationship is inarguable. The moment where Yang confronts Blake on her single minded focus to find Roman / Adam and the White fang is this crucial moment where Yang gets through to Blake, shares her backstory and establishes a bond between them. 
It’s nowhere in the manga. IT WAS CUT. 
And it’s such a shame because up to this point you could have mis-characterized Yang as the dumb party blonde stereotype that even she would play up in the early season where it’s apparent that she’s someone who is sharp, focused and can read into people pretty well. She recognizes Blake’s anger and tells her that it isn’t wrong for her to want Justice but if she doesn’t take care of her self shell never be able to achieve it. 
Oh some other cuts. RAVEN. Just never showed up because they didn’t even fight on the train. They just kind of got to the point of train impact without facing that much obstacles before all the Grimm attacked. 
It’s really frustrating because 
1. That was an S tier Fight. 
2. It did a great job at pointing out what Yang’s weaknesses were. 
3. Introduced Raven as someone super important and powerful. 
For some reason they still have Banesaw around and he fights Blake later. It actually makes more sense he’d fight Blake than Weiss narrative-wise but that’s besides the point, it’s just kind of weird he’d just be there anyways since he wasn’t a big shot or anything. 
Oh and STRQ isnt mentioned at all. 
Ok now that we are talking about the Villains. 
Roman is weird, in the show’s he’s this dashing suave dude who’s like “ah there you are red, you’re too late hahaha” *dips but in the comic he’s got this weirdly sadistic side almost like he’s being built up to be more of a threat than what he was and a more unhinged person. He threatens murder directly a lot more and one time I even thought he threatened Neo but the paneling was just weird and he’s talking to Banesaw. Either way it seems like he’s less kind to Neo in general and since that’s literally the only person he seemed to get along with in the show that makes me care less about him besides “ 100% evil sunday morning cartoon villain” I’ll take my “80% evil sunday morning cartoon villain” thank you very much
BUT THERE IS ONE SCENE WITH HIM EVERYONE DESPISES
It’s a HORRENDOUS scene in Chapter 15 thought where 
CONTENT WARNING: Sexual Assault Implications 
Ruby gets captured, in the manga it’s because she’s trying to get back Zwei, in the show it’s because she falls into a hole. That doesn’t really matter anyways she’s tied up and well here’s the page 
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followed by 
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and this isn’t as bad as it was originally before pressure to change it  https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/f2f8j9/the_controversy_regarding_rwby_manga_chapter_15/ 
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This is absolutely messed up. Just going over the content you have:
“I’d love to Entertain you myself”
“Have far more pressing concerns with a human like yourself”
“Plenty of Fun to be had, I’m sure”
and then Ruby gagged, and handcuffed to a chair as a bunch of tall faceless men in long black cloaks loom over her. You could say this all is just a misunderstanding and it’s just meant to foreshadow violence as a threat but it’s just done with such a sexual assault that the most charitable take is it’s a dogwhistle to that subject matter. Anyways thaat absolutely didn’t belong in RWBY and even reading it in Viz made me double take how they set up this scene and gave it such dark implications. Not that it was a deliberate narrative writing choice because it is undone really quickly. It just comes off as edgy and gross. 
Anyways some other things: 
JNPR Saga. Jaunedice is gone and while I’m not gonna lie, it’s definitely good that we didn’t have to relive through jaune going through his “ If I keep asking, maybe i’ll eventually get a yes through persistence” arc, I really feel like the pyrrha and jaune content is also weakened and though they might have overplayed this up in the show at least it ended up working on making me a shipper. Idk it wasn’t terrible but it felt a lot more surface level here. Also Ren and Nora were here too but even less prominent. 
Speaking of the dance, Blake goes with Sun instead of Yang. Because Sun invites her under the context of “you owe me”. Even though it’s done tongue in cheek, like even manga sun would hold it against her if she refused I think that this line does a good deal of disservice to Sun and also paints him in a weird Adam-ish tone. Sun’s whole deal is that he’s about unconditional kindness, he likes blake but he wouldnt want her to go with him unless she wanted it for herself. Leaning into the “haha let’s just say you owe me” leans more into something that Adam would use a source of manipulation. 
Oobleck: Is given a major glow up and actually ends up doing a lot in the end to the point at times it almost seems like it’s his story. He pulls of 300 IQ moves and ended up coordinating all the hunters and huntresses to the point of the breach based on the direction the wind was blowing and schematics he saw through someone’s pocket. Ok that’s an exaggeration but not by that much. The author is a fanboy over him and it’s good for memes but I’d argue it doesn’t improve the story by making him a more important character. I guess cool to see him fight a little bit more but it was kind of odd when he stunts on everyone so damn much. 
The fighting in general has some weak panelling except for a few scenes where it’s showing impact. The light as hell inking style makes it kind of annoying when there’s multiple people in one fight against a big target and you have to differentiate everyone and how people move from place to place. The way your eyes are supposed to move while reading a fight and how character motion transfers through panels. 
Neat informative video about that: https://youtu.be/zFFru4q_4H8?t=420 (whole video but I started at the point where they talk about panelling)
The art style is unique and i’ll give it that but too often it seems a bit more contrast and thicker lines would really benefit the series. Even when I was enjoying it, I still had these concerns. It’s just annoying when the artist is generally pretty good but you gotta zoom in to see certain things and all of that. 
So yeah, i’ve been disappointed in the later chapters to say the least and that’s incredibly incriminating when I wasn’t even that big of a fan of this adaptation to start with. I thought that maybe it could have been a loose reinterpretation for someone who was put off by V1/V2 animation standards/ wanted to get through the series even quicker but I couldn’t in good conscience recommend this as an alternative for the main series anymore. And that’s a shame. Luckily this all ends with V2 so we won’t have to worry about what else would be cut, shortened or ignored from the main series and we can focus on the actual show which all of love...or like at the least. 
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