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#i have no idea how they wormed their way into this au btw. where did they come from. why did i give them plot relevance
lycankeyy · 4 months
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I wanted to doodle Hanzo with my favorite ninja weapon and it somehow spiraled into this
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stars-obsession-pit · 3 months
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Danny Phantom - Worm fusion
Or well more of a “parahumans AU” of Danny Phantom; pretty much the only thing from Worm is the parahuman power stuff rather than the specific characters/locations being explicitly included. Basically “what if Danny Phantom involved Capes instead of ghosts”
Btw the links throughout this are generally to the wiki pages for things in case anyone is unfamiliar with anything. Or the general wiki links are here (DP) and here (Worm)
Jack and/or Maddie Fenton previously triggered and gained Tinker powers due to their ongoing obsession with trying to prove their scientific theories (which could be about ghosts or be something more Worm-y (e.g. potentially involving alternate earths or trying to find the origin of parahuman powers)).
Those new powers certainly didn’t improve the chaotic nature of their lab, but it did allow them to make far more complex devices.
The biggest of which is in the form of a portal. It’s taken a lot of work to create, but they’re hopeful that it will finally prove them right now that they’ve completed it. Finally make all the hardship they went through (enough to hardship to trigger) worth it.
…Except it fails. They plug it in, and nothing happens.
Well, nothing yet…
Later, their son Danny takes a few steps into the portal frame on a dare, and his hand knocks against a panel on the wall. A huge burst of electricity surges through the structure as a rift tears through the air.
Right on top of his fragile human body.
Energy courses through him as his vision is filled with the impossible sight of countless dimensions, of the near-endless expanse of space, and of gargantuan creatures spiraling through it all.
And then he collapses, the memories of what he saw slipping away from his brain as his new powers settle into his body.
(His parents, if they are nearby, see the visions too. The sight feels familiar, even if they can’t remember why. But any further consideration is shelved when they realize the portal is on.)
More misc thoughts about this idea beyond the cut:
I figure this’d be a setup that leads to getting a Trump power, since the trigger directly relates to another parahuman’s powers. Plus, a Trump power that allows for a bunch of different facets would align with his array of ghost powers from the show.
Specifically, it’d probably fit the “Infinity/Ten” subtype of Trump; those are caused by triggers that involve “a power breaking reality in the vicinity.” I think an unstable portal being opened on top of you should definitely count for that.
…But then idk how one would design a power of that type well. The description of “Power sets nearly limitless in both option and choice” feels hard to design for in a way that isn’t too OP, even with the “but where other large drawbacks often apply” caveat. Mainly from like, the word “limitless” interfering with my ability to tell what restrictions are reasonable.
…although. The subtypes are’t meant to be strict in-universe guidelines; I could just rebalance it based on ideas from other Trump power types that I find easier to conceptualize and it’d be fine even if it’s not “objectively correct” for the Infinity type.
Heck even if I felt that need to strongly justify it, the situation fits pretty close to triggers for the “Four” subtype (power sets that are limited to a few usually weaker/clunkier power options). His parents were obsessive tinkers; powers would have been a factor influencing his life for a while.
Also, outside of Trump power stuff, a Breaker state would make sense to fit closer in line to his ghostly nature from the show. Not 100% sure if that’d fit his trigger, but whatever. Maybe could just argue that the portal mucked with his senses/thoughts enough to justify an intertwined mental aspect of the event, idk.
…oh I just had an idea for what the actual power could be!
What if he has to be in his breaker state to use powers, and he can only select which powers to use at the moment of transformation? Meaning he has to choose his powers before he enters any fights and likely stick with just them for the duration of that fight.
Limits could be imposed based on what he chooses (e.g. if his powers are weaker the more he has active) and how he switches back and forth (he’d have to deactivate all of his powers to swap any out and maybe he has to recharge them before he can access them again, leaving him vulnerable in the meantime).
Might want to limit his power options too (unless just limiting the strength of the powers would be enough), but idk what a good rule for that would be. Like it could just be an arbitrary list of options I guess, but something more distinctive might be interesting. Maybe he has to experience something similar to a power before he can use it? Idk.
Also, outside of his powers, I’m not fully sure how one could best work in an equivalent to the ghost fights from the show. Like they could absolutely just be other capes in Amity Park, but I feel like it’d be cool to connect them to Danny or the portal somehow.
For some possible ideas for that, I guess:
They could have been in a cluster trigger with Danny (as long as the other triggers could be reasonably justified to have coincided with the portal activation)
The portal could have let some Eden material leak through, causing some people in the area to randomly gain powers (and probably mutations too) after consuming anything contaminated
If the portal is a unique phenomenon (e.g. if the straight-up Ghost Zone is included on top of the Worm stuff), the Shards could be incentivized to create more triggers in the area or prod existing hosts towards Amity Park to create more conflict and help them study it
If the portal leads to another world (or periodically connects to multiple other worlds), they could just be “regular” capes but pulled through from there
It wouldn’t be related to that portal incident, but if Vlad Masters was a power-granting Trump (akin to Worm/Ward’s Teacher), the ghost-analogues could be his empowered minions sent after the Fentons
…or they could just still be ghosts I guess, but I’m trying to lean this more on the Worm side of worldbuilding things than DP.
And some even more one-off random thoughts:
The GIW would just be a government-backed group akin to the PRT. Heck they could just be replaced by the literal PRT and Protectorate if it’s meant to be a full-on fusion with Earth Bet
If the portal is causing Eden material to leak through, Amity Park might end up evacuated/made into a quarantine site.
Instead of being given tech by Vlad like in the show, Valerie Gray’s situation could be reworked into a trigger event, with her probably being a vigilante afterwards (like as opposed to joining an actual hero team). Or if you wanted to keep the “given powers” thing in a slightly more directly parahuman-y way, she could get a Cauldron vial (maybe one supplied by Vlad to keep more similarity with the show). (though that would require including Cauldron in the fic too, at least in the background)
Skulker could be a Deviant/Case 53 who is similar to Trainwreck
I guess the implication of Fenton Works existing would be that Jack and Maddie are rogues who are open about their identities
Which could connect to why Danny is hiding his powers from them - unlike the original show, he has no reason to fear them taking the reveal badly, but he could want to keep his cape and civilian identities fully separate and thus not want to tell them lest they reveal it to the public
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niles-rainbow-room · 3 years
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Freemod Context! (Long!!)
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This is Gordon Freemod! He’s my own little AU Gordon, and I love him!
I made him based around the way I play Garry’s Mod
Cause, in Gmod, my player model is Gordon, and I literally cannot change it because whenever I go to change my model he just
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He looks at me. He judges me. He’s just refusing to let me change it.
Here’s just. A bunch of things about Freemod that aren’t related.
Btw, this whole thing is me going-
*projects rapidly*
These were all taken from various moments of me info dumping to my discord friends about him, so, that’s why there’s so many that are barely related.
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So
To get some characterization down, Freemod can go from Excited Sweet Voice at Everything to This Man is in God Mode and He is Staring You Down as You Attack Him
They’re also
very scared of Gman
It’s not even funny
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ANYWAYS something else about Freemod, he likes starting all out fights between people, but he’s very polite too so like
Someone says hi to him and he gives this big ol smile, next thing you know, he’s spawning headcrabs that could wipe out an army
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He also has no idea what to do with bodies like sometimes he just Sweet Voice cocoons them, and other times he just beats them rapidly if it was a combine or something
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Another thing! He doesn’t like making eye contact 100% of the time! If he gets too excited as well, he’ll despawn whatever was making him excited until he calms down.
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He’s also really fast when it comes to no-clipping.
He’ll shoot up into the air and fling himself from place to place, just absolutely soaring and loving that feeling of flying through the air
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He definitely makes Catboy Calhoun jokes but like
He’s also really nervous around Calhoun sometimes like he’s constantly checking in on them after making them fight a ton of headcrabs.
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He doesn’t really like using the majority of the guns. He just typically uses the quieter/less frantic weapons like the magnum or the crossbow.
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He’s like
Magnetically drawn to mirrors. He likes watching himself do the Sweet Voice and will do it for hours when he’s in the right mood if someone doesn’t stop him
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He’s very giggly and smiley when it comes to hearing other characters talk. But he also can be very mean and cutting to the people he doesn’t like. Especially combine.
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Freemod really likes Houndeyes.
*Really* likes them.
He spawned in a group of 8 and just watched them for a while, and then he spawns a MP Combine. It proceeds to stun stick every one of them. And they all die in one hit. They don’t even fight back.
What Freemod does next is basically the equivalent of “die a very painful death” and just beats the shit out of them while alive and dead.
They have to erase everything because they can’t stand the sight of the bodies of Houndeyes.
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Hi! Sorry to take you out of the immersion of reading my brain goo, or the annoyed scrolling of “Oh my god will she just shut up already” but!
Another thing I decided to do with him, I gave him a little plot. A hint of his own character rather than just being me but an AU Gordon.
So here that is!
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I feel like the only true way to contain Freemod and keep him from destroying the world is by keeping him in gm_construct
He likes it there sure, but like
If someone let him into Black Mesa let’s just say that the Resonance Cascade would’ve been way sooner and way more intense.
All he really does is fly around in there. Just. That’s it.
It’s his own personal Bug Bucket.
I don’t even think he realizes he’s trapped to be fair?
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Another thing with Freemod, I’m not exactly sure how he’d react to... say, the HLVRAI characters showing up in gm_construct one day, idk Benrey takes the gang on a trip to there out of nowhere and they find Freemod just vibing by himself, flying through the air on a capture point from TF2. I don’t know if he’d:
A: Summon a bunch of things to attack the HLVRAI crew for the fun of it
B: Immediately try to befriend all of them desperately
C: Possess a creature and disregard them
D: All of the above
Cause with all this “He’s trapped/alone” sorta thing, I don’t know if I’m making him into a villain or am I just making him very touch starved and sad?
Cause like, earlier I did say that if he was let out of gm_construct, the resonance cascade would’ve been sooner and more intense
Basically what I was thinking is that he doesn’t really limit how crazy his thoughts experiments can be that often, so like, he spawns a bunch of things all at once to see what would happen.
But he’s not like that all the time, like I said, he’s also very polite, he’s just got a thin coating of God Mode on and he’s very lonely.
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I was trying to figure out the thing with Freemod’s voice actually. I’m trying to think what they’d be like on the Gordon Scale.™️
I’d say he’s able to speak, but he doesn’t do it often. Because typically he’s only around NPCs and they can’t respond to him the way he wants, so why actually talk to them?
But he definitely talks to enemies as sort of a “I am the last thing you’ll ever hear” kind of thing.
But if he were to meet a different Gordon or someone with sentience he can talk to, he’d speak. Totally.
He talks to some of the alien/animal NPCs, cause like!!! Come on!!! That Houndeye over there needs to know that he’s a good boy!!!
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So, maybe when Freemod is upset or something, he spawns the biggest thing he can possibly think of and posses it, and goes on an absolute rampage until he’s better
So I can just imagine.
Freemod, not feeling great and tense:
Feetman: Mod, hey. Don’t do it...
Freemod: *spawns and possesses a Gene Worm, and roars*
Feetman: FREEMOD NO GET OUT OF THE GIANT MONSTER-
Or like. He just possesses something and just. Flies away.
He just has moments where he’s too out of his head and he needs to just escape.
Something he’s been doing recently is possessing a Stukabat and flying up on top of a roof of a really high building and just. Viewing everything.
This man is SAD please hug him :((
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Ooh, another thing,
He doesn’t like that dark room at all. In gm_construct? He will not go in there for more than a minute. That place scares him so much. Not even the fact that it’s dark, he just hates that he can’t see anything and while he knows he’s alone in the world he’s in, and he controls what can exist there or not, but, he just refuses to go there, even with a flashlight.
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Aaaaaand that’s all the content I’ve made for them so far! Now that y’all know the context for him, I’ll post the comic of him meeting the HLVRAI characters, as well as some other drawings!
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crazynekochan · 4 years
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Okay, I have an idea for a AU. It comes based on how, aside from the pretty factor, we never really get to see Junko use her Ultimate Gyaru Talent in her plans. I was inspired by hearing about the Amekaji or 'American Casual' subculture of Gyaru and thinking "hey, yknow who this style reminds me of? Kazuichi" A quick reference to some samples before I get into my idea:
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(Please excuse the fact that I didn't crop the screenshots)
Anyway- in this AU, I wanted to use how we all wanted Junko to manipulate the Remnants into following her and Kazuichi's trust issues. Junko, finding his talent to be one of the most immediately useful of the class and him to be one of the most easily manipulated and emotion driven of the class, decides to become his best friend! It starts slow, her beginning to hang out with him after classes and eventually during lunch, constant compliments, telling him what he wants to hear, comforting him when he trusts her enough to open up about his issues with trust. Soon enough, she's wormed her way into his circle, becoming his closest friend. He reveals that he didn't chose his appearance for his own happiness but for his image and she pounces. She insists that she can give him a glow-up- give him a partial overhaul. Help him with the god awful layering in his hair, maybe even make Sonia like him (or Gundham, depending on whether or not he has realized his feelings for him/given up on his crush on her if he has one at the start of this au). This is where the Amekaji Gyaru part comes in, she pretty much turns him into one. The way the class gets introduced to this style change is by Chisa coming by to round up Kazuichi when he doesn't come back after lunch. This is an approximation of what I think she would do on such short notice. (He was meant to have an expression but I gave up on that front on the sketch to have an easier go at designing his clothes without obstruction or scruntiching). Oh yeah, it's an Omegaverse AU btw, because I am predictable and pathetic lol.
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I kinda want to make a fic with this and I'm planning on using Gundham's POV because he already likes Kazuichi before Junko began sinking her claws into him and he wound be concerned and conflicted from the get go. Because while Junko is very much using Kazuichi (though they don't catch onto that aspect right away), she's boosting his confidence. He's happy to have a best friend who cares about him seemingly unconditionally. But they also realise that he's becoming obsessive in a way that she's certainly not discouraging. He's always talking about her, texting her, hanging out with her, he even picks up some of her traits. At one point someone (Fuyuhiko most likely) would comment along the lines of "what are you in love with her or something" and Kazuichi would respond with something like "oh of course not! Junko deserves much more than me!" Or something equally self-deprecating and out of character like that. It's not healthy.
He would voluntarily watch the brainwashing video with Mikan (like in the Siren AU), believing that Junko just wanted to show him something cool. He would despair at the betrayal, since the despairs are aware enough to realise things like that. If he contracts the Remembrance disease, he would probably go for the convincing Ibuki into suicide route like in the Siren AU, for the opportunity to watch the despair. I love the idea of having an active despair in the cast and with this AU, instead of him just continuing to be devoted to Junko like in the Siren AU, I wanted him to actually come around as a Despair to Hope because of the others. Hajime is there now, he would've begun to be friends with Kazuichi and continue after Kaz remembers and he, being the good boy that Hajime is, actually treats Kazuichi like a real friend should. He didn't get to become close to Fuyuhiko before Junko got to him so he also becomes friends with him. Also, of course, Soudam happens. I'd imagine that they would make him come around enough to rebuke the Junko AI in the end.
Kazuichi definitely would feel guilty as hell when this is all said and done, however, the class would also feel guilty for letting him fall into Junko's clutches too. Also, the greater trauma of him knowing that his second best friend after the one in middle school pulled the same shit but worse? 👌👌👌. I have other sketches of them hat I plan to colour, so I'll be back. I'll link you the fic once I write it. Tell me what you think about this, please! Spare no thought! Oh yeah, I'm mentally calling this the Gyaru AU
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Mod: It will never stop being huge wasted potential that Junko didn’t manipulate all the Remnants by using their trauma and weaknesses, and specifically chose them for their useful talents like it was implied in the game, and instead just went with them being chosen at random because they were Ryota’s classmates
Having Kazuichi be Junko’s first victim is perfect, because with his talent he is super useful to her and can easily make her unstoppable the moment she has him under her control. And with his trust issues and straight up need to have a friend in his life he would be an easy target for someone like Junko, who can very quickly play him like a fiddle. Let him vent to her, tell him what he wants to hear, give him confidence and then put him into his place so that he becomes her loyal dog who sees her like some god who will do anything to please her, just like Mikan did. Until she then finally breaks him by betraying him like his best friend did in the past. The pain must be so unbearable for the poor guy. I feel really bad for him, but at this point the brainwashing is already in place sadly, so he will just get some high from being used and betrayed all over again and again
Kazuichi going through the simulation way past getting infected and having all of his memories must be such a trip. Because he has to pretend like nothing is amiss while everything else is going on and make sure that no one notices his change in character (Which could be hard for him to do, since he doesn’t seem like a good actor) I could even see him during the last trial to try and push the others into doing the wrong choice until they manage to make him believe in hope again and having trust in his friends that they will not betray him ever. Which must be so hard for him to believe after being lied to so many times by people he trusted blindly, where Junko even made him and the others do such horrendous things. But it wouldn’t be DR if hope doesn’t win in the end and everyone manages to have a future
Though the most hurtful part must be seeing everything from Gundham’s POV, because he is stuck with having to watch how Junko is getting close to Kaz. Which is at first of course a nice thing on the outside, but when Kaz starts getting seriously degrading about himself it’s really getting concerning but it’s already too late. Even more painful for Gundham when he might have had a bad feeling about the “friendship” but has pushed it onto him probably just being jealous or something and as such never intervened when he really should’ve done so, because then all of this could’ve been avoided where Kaz was turned into a pupped who got to build the most brutal killing machines imaginable for Junko’s absolute insane plan of creating a world of despair. When the truth comes to light he would be feeling such immense guilt over not having seen the signs and came to help Kaz when he still had the chance (Could be even something Junko could use against Gundham, both back at HPA and in the last trial if he’s still alive at that time in the AU)
Also the artwork of Kaz after his makeover looks sooo good! He is beyond cute and it mixes so well his actual nerdy aesthetic he had before with something more fun and colourful (quite literally) ♥♥
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thebadchoicemachine · 4 years
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Cryptid Jon (Blind Eye AU)
An AU where Jon prevents himself from finishing the watcher’s crown. He shut the eye but in doing so kind of resets everything and he gets erased from existence somehow.  
If you wanna do something more with this be my guest btw, write, draw, whatever. Don’t even have to credit i'm just throwing stuff out here.
Things get reset back to episode one basically
Although Jon doesn’t and has never existed there’s no real butterfly effect from this, things are the same but he’s absent.
Archivist!Sasha?
None of the Fears nor their avatars are aware of him, not even the web or eye.
In fact he’s a blind spot for the eye, at least to Jonah.
He’s still got those good good Archivist powers and can fight avatars, it just doesn’t feed the eye like it used to. Just him. They’re HIS powers now.
He decides he should keep his distance because w h a t  t h e  h e l l  he is NOT rushing into this one. Keeping his card close as he can.
Basically tries to secretly help out the Archivist Crew with as much self control as he can. (LOTS of angst from the shadows about Tim, Sasha, Martin)
Lives in the tunnels and chats  with Leitner some before he gets piped.
“accidentally” Fails to mention to Leitner that there’s a pipe with his name on it.
Meets Michael and they’re kinda buds now(?)
He kind of reveals himself preventing the Jane Prentiss attack.
Manages to stop the Not!Them from taking anyone.
Everyone’s just worried and confused like “oh no there’s another monster and he knows all about us?”
except Elias who is kind of freaking out because he has no idea who that is and he can’t See it either what the fuuuuuuu but files it in the back of his head as some weird Darkness Avatar and maybe it can mark Sasha.
Elias is trying to build the watchers crown with Sasha now btw because he has no idea of what happened before.
•••
Well shit, Basira is looking into him now because he managed to still be blamed for Leitner’s murder.
This wouldn’t be a problem if Daisy (currently unchecked avatar of the Hunt) wasn’t helping her GF.
Jon’s out of the tunnels now because the Archive Crew’s exploring. (Not!Them escaped and is staying away from the Eye’s domain so it’s not trapped there. Preparing for the unknowing probably.)
Jon makes some knew friends! (The other Avatars) They hate him! Very Much!
Jon’s actually become a bit infamous among the things of the fears as this (supposed) Avatar to The Eye that just keeps fucking their stuff up.
Micheal is just loving watching everyone pull their hair about this. He’s still taking people though (Helen…)
Peter complains about it to Elias. Elias has moved him up a few spaces on his his concern list.
Meanwhile Sasha, Tim, and Martin have also shifted their focus to that strange man that helped(?) them, supposedly clocked an old man to death, then vanished.
He shows up in statements sometimes and they’re debating on wether he’s a monster or some kind of monster hunter or maybe just a friendly-ish monster...
Tim think’s he’s good because he killed the worms (and stopped a circus mannequin in one statement), Martin’s cautious because he showed up at his house right before the worms attacked him and Sasha’s torn and undecided.
Sasha and Daisy have a fight like Daisy and Jon did but it gets sorted in a similar way except with less Elias hate.
Elias doesn’t face as much resistance in this au so doesn’t let his mask slip as much but he is being thrown so off by Jon.
Elias gets less hate because everyones focusing more on Jon aka strange library man aka Joe Spooky.
But I cannot stress enough how much worse this is for him than cannon.
•••
Melanie and Georgie are on a date or something when they come home to find a stranger petting the Admiral. Freaking out they jump to fight (Melanie)/call the police (Georgie) but the man stands up apologizing they froze.
Having him look directly at them made them feel like he was looking at every layer of them, from clothes to skin to bone.
It felt like he could riffle through their minds like a file cabinet but (even worse) like he didn’t need too. Like he already knew everything he wanted to about them.
He said they clearly didn’t recognize him, disappointed, like they should have, and that he just needed something familiar to be with for a while (gesturing to the cat).
He then mumbled something about recommending they avoid travel for a while and started to walk briskly (almost… awkwardly?) past them to the door.
He paused halfway out the door and mumbled to “stay away from The Magnus Institute, especially the Archivist. Don’t give them anything and whatever you do-”
He turned, and they could feel him seeing something about themselves even they didn’t know, all apologeticness gone from his character. “Do. Not. Give. A statement.”
They knew- they KNEW- with every fiber of their beings that he meant them no harm but would bring it regardless. In that moment, with every fiber of their beings, they knew.
Then he blinked and hurried out before either of them could snap to their senses.
They filled out a police report and tried to forget it but could constantly swear they caught glimpses of him around their neighborhood after that.
•••
Oh Boy The Web Keeps Trying To Wrap Itself Around Jon But It’s Not Working And It’s Pissing It Off!
The Unknowing happens much earlier
Eventually they go to stop the unknowing (guided by Elias) along with Basira and Daisy.
Nikola actually kidnapped Jon because she was obsessed with this “stranger” and thought he’d be fun for the ritual.
Micheal frees him and Helen shows up but they don’t kill each other. 
Micheal liiiives. 
Instead The Archive Crew finds a door opening up and the strange man from the tunnels assures them that the unknowing will fail whether they do anything or not.
He warns Sasha (and subconsciously Tim) especially to stay away from the stranger.
He lets slip a BUNCH more of way more personal information he knows about them to convince them to stay away.
He also warns them to not trust Elias. After Matin went “but Elias said-“
Sasha want to know what The Stranger means.
Tim does not like this. Neither does Daisy. They end up trying to fight Jon. Jon refuses to fight and let’s slip something about The Hunt controlling Daisy then bolts back into Helen’s door.
The Archivcrew end up being stalled enough that by the time they get there the whole place is aflame. (Thanks Jude….)
Tim and Martin have switched opinions of him. Tim distrusts him now and Martin feels he’s an ally, at least. Sasha has decided that whatever he is he’s information and goes on a search to find him with Daisy (uh oh) and Basira.
They end up going to where a break in was reported, nothing stolen and the description of a short, heavily scarred man with long hair matched their spooky man. (It’s Georgie’s house.)
Georgie and Melanie accidentally end up giving a statement which made for a very awkward moment when they said he said to not give anything to the Archivist and Sasha had to clear her throat and mention that she is the Archivist. Oops.
Meanwhile Elias is going nuts because now this blind spot has actively disrupted his plans. Jon has his full attention.
Elias (…Jonah) is patient. He’s waited so long for this, putting plans on hold to stomp out an unwanted rock in the road is fine.
1/? will probably make more of this EDIT: part 2
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snake!Nino AU
this is a bullet fic rewrite of Desperada featuring my love for Nino (I’m not anti-Luka by the way I just like the potential softness of this AU, I have like.... I have like... twenty-fi... 25,913 different takes on Desperada and this is just my newest one)
—Nino is on board the Liberty with everyone else just chilling and vibing with Luka because he loves music too; he plays the violin because I said so and he’s just in the background tuning it and looking low-key sad while the whole “Luka flirts with Marinette and teaches her guitar” thing happens.
—When Kagami and Adrien show up, Nino is just absolutely ecstatic that Adrien was finally able to get out of the house, and he LIGHTS UP and is like “omg!!! You’re here!!! Is this Kagami!!! It’s so nice to finally meet you, you’re my sibling now, no take-backs.”
—And Alya is like “hey Adrien can I talk to you for a second,” so he stays there while Nino just drags Kagami off to show her his instrument and talk to her and she’s like “omg this guy is A LOT” but you can tell she’s happy that someone is paying attention to her
—Meanwhile, Alya is just trying so hard to get Adrien to talk to Marinette, and she’s just like “hmmm is someone a little jealous of Luka?” And Adrien is just like “no lol I’m fine with just playing piano, different people have different skills, I’m happy for him that he knows how to play the guitar.” And Alya is like “facepalms”
—Meanwhile, Marinette is still just panicking as she frantically glances back and forth between Luka and Adrien and Kagami and is just internally keysmashing
—so at this point, we’re only like 2 minutes into the episode, it all happened fast and Marinette hasn’t had time to react
—All of a sudden they’re interrupted by the sound of arguing above deck
—Which is, of course, Jagged Stone begging Anarka to play guitar for him
—She refuses, and Jagged sees Marinette and asks her if she knows any guitar players
—Marinette’s still just panicking and Nino is like “oh no my girl is having an anxiety” and so he just kinda gently steps in like “hey Jagged, I don’t play guitar but I can DJ and help mix music together if that helps”
—and Jagged’s like “you know what, what the heck, sure, I’ll take it, you can be my new partner” and Marinette is still just trying to cool down and stop panicking
—When, whoops, Desperada shows up out of nowhere, and is like “Jagged Stone!!! I can’t believe you’re trying to replace me!!” And she tries to zap Nino into dust, but Kagami, being an idiot who bonded with him already, just leaps in front of him and gets turned to dust instead.
—Cue the chaos where she tries to zap everyone who has an instrument, including Luka and Anarka, while also specifically going after Nino
—and Nino being a dumb self-sacrificial idiot sees Desperada almost get Alya (who’s trying to get footage of the Akuma battle of course) so Nino just starts playing his violin to get Desperada’s attention
—she almost gets him, but Adrien tackles Nino to the ground at the last second (the violin breaks and it’s very sad) and then helps him up and pulls him behind a corner, Alya sees them and starts sneaking around and shows up beside them a few seconds later
—Ladybug, who just transformed, spots them and hurries over, helping them make their way safely to the sewers, but Alya’s an idiot and is like “gotta stay and film” so it ends up being just Nino and Adrien down there
—Ladybug calls up her Lucky Charm and it goes like canon, she realizes she needs extra help so she runs over to Fu and picks up the snake miraculous (though she does seriously consider the turtle for a second because a shield would be nice, she’s not sure if 5 minutes would be enough time to figure out how to defeat Desperada, and then they’d be out of luck
—meanwhile, Adrien is like “hey Nino you should hide in here I’ll totally hide for real too” and Nino’s like “are you stupid I’m not going to hide in a locker, Alya’s in danger up there, they got Kagami who’s my sister now, I don’t make the rules”
—but the thing is, Ladybug just went get a miraculous for backup, and Nino is also trying to avoid suspicion and be like “Hey Adrien, you should hide down here though, it’d be a good idea if you were out of the way and safe and I was alone with Ladybug for a brief amount of time for NO REASON don’t ask questions”
—so they’re still just having a very dodgy argument in the locker room when Ladybug shows up and is like “screw it I’m not gonna come up with an excuse. Adrien, here’s the snake miraculous, congratulations”
—And Nino is like “aaaaAaaAaA oh my gosh!!! Adrien, you’re a superhero now!!! This is so cool!!!” And just fanboys his little heart out and Adrien is like “haha yay” but like it’s hard to be panicking about this when Nino is so happy
—Plagg doesn’t even get a chance to argue because everyone is in the room at the same time; Adrien just transforms into Aspik and they start going
—and things go similar to canon BUT Nino keeps being dumb and trying to sacrifice himself for Adrien because he’s stupid like that and I love him, and also, Nino’s presence gives Marinette something else to think about so she’s slightly less flustered because Nino is at least a normal person, (also it stops Adrien from flirting with Ladybug as much because not only is he like “Ladybug stop dying” he’s also like “Nino ST OP” because Nino just gets disintegrated every time he takes his eyes off of him
—so because Marinette is panicking less she’s also spending a lot more time being like “where the H E C K is my dumb kitty cat, where I S he?”
—So Adrien’s still suffering (TM) but he realizes a lot sooner that this isn’t working and he needs to just detransform to talk to Plagg because he’s having anxiety because so many things are happening all at once (oh also Alya shows up in a couple of loops and gets vaporized a couple of times too)
—So anyways he finally restarts the loop and is like “I’m done, I can’t do this, being a hero is Too Much Stress for me I guess,”
—and of course, he hands the miraculous off to Nino, because 1) it’s Nino 2) Adrien feels like Nino’s been doing a better job of paying attention to Desperada and protecting them during time loops than Adrien has (which isn’t necessarily true but Adrien is a self-deprecating idiot) 3) Nino is the only other person there
—So Nino is like trying to hug Adrien and tell him it’s going to be okay because Adrien is crying actual tears but Adrien’s like “nope gotta go be elsewhere whoops”
—Marinette’s like “hey Nino I guess you can be the snake, your FIRST MIRACULOUS EVER WINK WINK and Nino’s like HAHA YEP NEVER SEEN ONE OF THESE BEFORE IN MY LIFE
—Adrien runs off and apologizes to Plagg and Chat Noir shows up a moment later
—Nino notices how much less flustered Ladybug is by Chat Noir than by Adrien and is like "oh worm?" and probably brings it up with Adrien at the end of the episode
—they all fight side by side
—Nino realizes that he needs to provide a distraction so Ladybug and Chat Noir can take Desperada by surprise, so he uses his DJing skills to start blasting music over the liberty’s speakers
—They win,
—Ladybug is like “I couldn’t have done it without you Chat Noir I love you I mean haha nothing”
—Chat Noir fanboys over snake!Nino and is like “you’re my hero omg”
—epic three-sided “pound it”
—Marinette uses the miracle cure to put everything back to norma
—Adrien shows up soon and Nino just RUSHES over to him to say that he definitely did amazing and just showers him with love and support and Adrien just showers compliments back at Nino and asks for his autograph
—Kagami shows up again a few minutes later and is super awkwardly like “what do I do now” and Nino is like “come over here you’re one of the bros” and they just chill and have fun and Nino just starts showing them his SoundCloud
—Marinette still feels guilty for panicking earlier in the morning and is like “I gotta fix this” so she talks to Jagged and is like “btw Luka is a very good guitar player, you should talk to him”
—Vivica (aka desperada) gets her job with Jagged back and she and Luka end up talking because of it and they start bonding over their love for guitars and Vivica offers to let Luka be a guest in their performance and to give him more professional guitar lessons and he’s like “holy hecking yes”
—Marinette is like “problem solved I guess but now what do I do? Oh no, Adrien and Kagami are being happy together over there”
—Alya is like “go talk to them” and Marinette’s like “I can’t what if I panic” and Alya’s like “fine I’ll talk to them first” and she just flops down next to Nino and starts joking along with them
—Marinette follows a little bit later and immediately Kagami is like “Marinette you’re so amazing, I didn’t know you were friends with Jagged Stone? Adrien was telling me you designed his album cover? That’s incredible I wish I could be as talented as you” and Marinette’s just like “omg Kagami is not evil?? Who knew??”
—The episode ends with Marinette trying to act as normal as she can around Adrien and then Alya’s like “hey Kagami I gotta show you the photos I took of the Akuma fight. Nino, you should come too” and she just winks at Marinette and Marinette’s like “oh no I am alone with Adrien”
—but then Adrien is just like, “I wish I could be part of the Ladyblog, Ladybug is so cool *dreamy face* and Marinette just dies immediately
—they're all happy and everyone gets love and support; the end
115 notes · View notes
writinganothertime · 4 years
Text
We Get Through This Together
pairing: albert x elmer
warnings: panic attack, self harm, blood, unexpected death (of someone who’s hardly a character)
story: ... it’s a panic attack
time period: modern au
word count: 2,643
a/n: every time there’s a dotted line the point of view changes
Elmer sat back against the headboard of his bed. He had been out all day. Race, Albert, and Romeo had thought it would be fun to try to go to as many of their favourite places as they could. So they’d been all over town. He was exhausted and just wanted to sit down. He knew he should get some supper ready for himself but granted himself some moments of relaxation. Albert was coming over right away too. Just to hang out for the evening. Elmer loved anytime spent with his boyfriend and was looking forward to it but supper could wait for a few minutes. He pulled up Instagram and scrolled through it. He liked a couple photos without really thinking about it. He realized that one of his old friends had posted so he took a better look at it. He mumbled to himself as his brain tried fit the pieces together.
“That’s Tyson isn’t it? Yeah. Yeah. Shoot. Shoooooot.”
The caption slowly wormed itself into his head. Tyson had died. It was an underlying health issue. Him and his family had always known about it but they hadn’t expected it to kill him. Elmer didn’t even register the fact that his breathing had picked up until it was too late. He started scratching his arm absently, still scrolling through the posts with his other hand. He went up to the stories, seeing all the tributes to his childhood friend. His vision blurred and he dropped his phone.
“No no no no no,” he whispered.
“Not now not now.”
But the panic had started and he didn’t know how to stop it. There were so many words in his brain, what were they? Why didn’t he know? Did his chest feel tight? Why wasn’t he breathing? He choked out a breath and suddenly noticed he was crying. He couldn’t breathe couldn’t breathe couldn’t breathe. He scratched his arm harder as if the sensation would fill his lungs with air. He curled in on himself, the contact between his hand and arm never breaking. He pressed himself into a ball, so tense it was almost painful. Why was it so loud? Was something playing in the background? He couldn’t remember. Tears were rushing down his cheeks as he tried to suck in breath after breath. He was dying. He knew it. Albert was going to find him lifeless. Why did it have to be like this? Another sob left him painfully. He tried to curl himself tighter if that was possible. He couldn’t feel anything. Was he on his bed? Elmer had no idea. He couldn’t even remember the city he was in. And so many words were flying through his mind. He was crying so hard but hardly even realized it.
He was so far in his head.
——————————————————————————
Albert entered the apartment. He did have a key, but the door was unlocked and Elmer had told him he was always welcome. Elmer had probably left the door unlocked because he knew Albert would be over right away. Albert took in the room in a quick glance. The kitchen and living room looked completely empty, Elmer wouldn’t have cleaned up from supper that quickly right? It felt suspicious. (Those thoughts ran through his mind in a split second btw because our brains think things SO QUICKLY) He heard the crying almost immediately. He wondered briefly if he had ever seen Elmer cry before. Probably, but no exact instance was coming to mind right now, not important he reminded himself. He hesitated only a moment before moving in the direction of Elmer’s bedroom. He paused in the doorway trying to process the scene in front of him. Elmer looked broken. As soon as the thought crossed his mind he regretted it and wished he could erase a thought. His brain felt fuzzed out and he wasn’t sure what to do. He stepped forward.
“Elmer?” He said it quietly, afraid of startling him. Elmer did not respond so he tried again.
“Ellie?” He said slightly louder than usual.
Elmer was making horrible, frantic sounds. His sobs were coming out way too quickly and each breath seemed to only go in halfway before it was forced out again. He scratching vigorously at one arm and Albert realized he was bleeding. Once Albert realized Elmer was hurting himself he lunged forward, attempting to pry his arms apart. That was not a good move. Elmer actually stopped breathing for a few seconds.
——————————————————————————
His thoughts were still too fast and he couldn’t make sense of anything. Feeling something on his arms somehow raised the level. Now he literally couldn’t breathe. He squeezed his eyes shut as tight as he could and glued his arms together across his knees. His nails were digging into his skin but he couldn’t tell how hard and he was so desperately wanting a grip on reality. The buzzing was SO LOUD where did it come from? He wondered if Albert was there. Was someone talking? Maybe he was already dead. Who knows.
——————————————————————————
Albert didn’t know what to do. He was smart enough to understand he shouldn’t touch Elmer right now. The crying stopped for almost 30 seconds and Albert realized his boyfriend wasn’t breathing.
“Elmer!” He said it close to his ear, hoping to get though to him.
Elmer sucked in a breath and started those horrible, heart breaking sobs again. But he was breathing, even if it was very uneven. Maybe he could hear Albert. Albert decided to keep talking. He sat down near Elmer careful not to brush against him.
“I’m right here baby. You’re going to be ok, you know that? You need to breathe for me ok?” He paused, and muttered to himself, “breathing exercises?” He thought for a second and tried to think of what would be good numbers.
“We’ll start easy ok? I know it hard, um, can you breathe in for four? I’ll count, one, two, three, four.” He knew Elmer had not done that at all but he wasn’t going to give up that easily. He continued counting up and down from four watching the dark haired boy closely to see if he was following.
——————————————————————————
Elmer had no idea how much time had passed. Was he even still alive? Was it the same day? Maybe this was a dream. His thoughts were getting slightly more coherent. He could tell he was thinking now. Not all the words were registering but he could tell he was thinking. That probably meant he was still alive. The buzzing sound in his ears hadn’t quieted at all but he could hear something in the midst of it, trying to break through. He tried to focus on it. He couldn’t remember if he had the tv on or not, was he even in the living room? Maybe his phone was ringing, no that wasn’t it. A voice? No it was music, no wait. It was definitely a voice. Think Elmer think! he chided himself. The voice was counting. Maybe. It was hard to make out. And he recognized it. But who? He suddenly felt very choked up and gulped in a breath, he’d been forgetting to breathe. His body couldn’t handle him trying to figure out and focus on multiple things at once. Oh they were counting. Numbers numbers. Oh only to four. Ok ok ok. He counted to four in his head though he didn’t know why. He heard them say “three” after four and got confused.
——————————————————————————
“Wait!” Elmer choked out in a sob. That was only thing Albert had heard him say since he had gotten there almost ten minutes ago.
“Elmer? Ellie? Can you hear me now?”
Elmer made no indication that he had heard. The cries coming from him were more regular now. Not all staggered and painful sounding. That was a step in the right direction. But he was still scratching himself. He was really bleeding now and had blood all over his hand, other arm, and pants. Albert was afraid to touch him again, not wanting to set him back.
“It’s alright baby, I’ve got you, I’ve got you. Let’s keep going ‘kay?” Albert began counting again hoping with all his might that his boyfriend was hearing him.
——————————————————————————
“Breathe in for four seconds yeah?” This was the first full sentence Elmer understood in what felt like forever. He tried to nod but he was still curled into a ball. Where were his lungs? Breathe Elmer come on. He tried to breathe in for four seconds but it didn’t work. It took a couple of failed attempts but he finally managed to breathe in for four seconds. The voice was also counting backwards. Ok ok. He probably had to breathe out for those counts too. Elmer tried so hard to focus. His crying kept interrupting his breathing but he was trying. The buzzing quieted slightly. The voice was clear. Oh. Oh. It was Albert. He was here. Elmer’s brain couldn’t decide if that was better or worse; better because he was helping or worse because he was seeing him like this. His brain overloaded and he stopped breathing again.
“Elmer,” he heard, “you’re doing so good, come on, I’m here. I’m gonna count again. Let’s try seven seconds both ways?”
Slowly his thinking returned and he tried to do what Albert was saying.
——————————————————————————
Elmer was still curled tight. Albert couldn’t see his face. But his crying, oh, it had almost completely stopped. Elmer was breathing with him now only interrupted occasionally with shaky breaths or cried. As one does when the body tries to calm itself.
“You’re doing so good baby, I’m so proud of you. We’ll clean you up when you’re ready. Let’s keep going for now.”
——————————————————————————
Things were a lot clearer in Elmer’s mind now. He was VERY aware of everything he was thinking and what was going on around him. The input was almost too much again. He tried to tune out all the data he was getting and focus on Albert’s voice again. He decided he was glad his boyfriend was here. If he hadn’t come, maybe he wouldn’t have ever stopped panicking. He could feel his head pressed against his knees. He realized his arm was in a LOT of pain and it was warm and sticky ‘oh my gosh I’m bleeding’ he thought.
“Hey Elmer, I love you and I’m so proud of you. You’re doing so much better. Can I touch you now?” The thought of Albert touching him scared him even though he wanted it at the same time. He shook his head quickly before he could change his mind.
“Ok, that’s fine,” Albert started to settle back to lean against the headboard then sat up again. “Ellie, you’re actually, uh, not to alarm you, but you’re bleeding kind of a lot. Is it ok if I put a towel on your arm? I’ll try not to touch you too much.”
It was probably a good idea. His arm stung and he was just making it worse. He nodded slowly. Albert disappeared and came back a minute later.
“Ok, I got a cloth, I want to wipe your arm, I got a towel and a glove. I want to put it on the hand that was doing the scratching.” Elmer slowly separated his arms. It hurt. Everything hurt. He’d been so tense for so long. Albert gently wiped the cloth over Elmer’s forearm, trying to not touch his skin with his fingers, just the cloth.
“Actually can you put on the glove, maybe you don’t want me doing it.”
Elmer raised his head slightly. Everything was blurry and felt sort of sideways. He took the glove Albert held out for him and put it on. He leaned his forehead down on his knees again but didn’t press himself tightly together. He was in a looser ball now. Albert wrapped the towel around his bleeding arm then sat back. Unconsciously Elmer started rocking back and forth.
——————————————————————————
Albert felt Elmer moving beside him and glanced at him. He watched him rock back and forth for a couple seconds, a smile twitching at the corner of his mouth. He was so glad Elmer was feeling better and was (he hoped) comforting himself by rocking. Albert stared straight ahead. He felt weirdly tired despite the fact that he had just sat there. He turned his head to watch the dark haired boy again. Elmer raised his head slightly and turned it to look at Albert. His eyes were red and puffy. He had tear steaks down his cheeks and Albert realized he should’ve offered to wipe his face too.
“Hey baby,” Albert said softly. Elmer didn’t reply, just kept rocking.
“You’re gonna be ok, you’re safe you know that?” The red head reminded him.
El nodded slightly.
“I’m here and I’m not going to leave.” A pause. “It didn’t look like you’d had anything to eat, should I make something? Soup maybe?”
Elmer shook his head. Albert didn’t mind. He knew Elmer was not doing well and Albert had already had supper before coming over.
——————————————————————————
They were silent for awhile, only broken by Elmer’s occasional sniffles. Eventually Albert got up.
“I’m just going to go get some water,” he raised his hand as if he was going to pat El on his head or shoulder, then thought better of it and walked away. He came back with a glass of water and a water bottle. He handed the water bottle to his boyfriend.
“Have some water.”
Albert sat back down, drinking half of his cup before setting it aside and getting under the covers.
Awhile later Elmer was feeling much better. He just wanted to lay down but he’d been in his little ball for so long he didn’t know if he could. Slowly he tried to relax and stretch out. He tried to say something but his voice wasn’t there. He turned to look at Albert who was watching him. Albert sat up again.
“I’ll be right back.” He came back (again) with a cloth.
“Is it ok if I wipe your face?”
Elmer nodded. He really wanted his boyfriend to touch him now but didn’t want or know how to ask for it. Al held Elmer’s chin lightly as he cleaned off his face. When he was done he tossed the cloth into the laundry hamper and got back into bed.
“You wanna cuddle?” He asked with a smile.
Elmer nodded before slowly and carefully sliding underneath the blanket. He fitted himself against Albert, his head on the red head’s chest. Albert lightly raked his fingers though Elmer’s hair.
“How are you feeling now?” He murmured.
“Sore,” El whispered back. His voice was gone but he could still whisper.
“Understandable, you should try and stretch out.”
Elmer was still mostly in a ball, he was just laying on his side now. He stretched his legs out wincing with the change of position. Albert reached down to rub his thigh.
“There ya go, I know it’s uncomfortable at the moment but this should feel better.”
Elmer nodded shifting to lay more comfortably against his boyfriend.
Albert brought his hand up to Elmer’s upper arm, rubbing gently.
“We’ll have a good day tomorrow. I’ll make pancakes or something, that sound good?”
Elmer was very drowsy, he wasn’t sure if he had nodded in response or not. The sound of Albert speaking quietly, the soothing rubbing on his arm, knowing his boyfriend was there and he was completely safe, all those things combined made him very sleepy. And that all his energy had been used up in the panic attack.
“I love you Ellie.”
Elmer didn’t have the strength to reply but he put his arm over Albert and attempted to hug him.
“Go to sleep,” Al whispered, “I’ve got you.”
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thousandsunnywrites · 4 years
Note
Hi there! First off, I wanted to say that you have an absolutely wonderful blog! I was wondering if you could maybe do some headcannons for Kid and Killer liking the same girl? Keep up the good work you beautiful human being!!!❤️
Hello! Thank you so much 😩💘 I really liked this idea so I incorporated it into a college au! that I just posted haha. hope you don’t mind, but the course of this ends with Killer/reader :-)
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artist unknown
Kid & Killer
Part 1 here
Kid was the cool boisterous kid in the engineering program, while Killer was the silent, homebody studying in the psychology department. When the two worlds collided, they became good friends--hell, best friends maybe. 
When Kid found out that a small fry like y/n wrote an article about him, he was flattered; but when he found out you analyzed the shit out of his love life--without his permission b t w and don’t let me get started on the barbaric descriptions-- he decides to pay the little journalist.
Killer shot you a text message, asking to meet at a bubbly tea cafe to work on some assignments from Ms. Robin, to which you said sure, sounds like a great idea.
Kid spotted you first. 
He backed you against the English building, figure completely looming over your seemingly small frame. “I-I a m s o s o r r y,” exasperated, knowing he was fuming over the bad article Robin decided to publish under anonymous, which didn’t work bc everyone knew about Kid’s bad litany of lovers. Your knees bucked underneath you, his face near yours to the point where he was breathing down your neck. This is how I’m gonna die h u h.
“Take it down. Who the fuck gave you permission to slander my name huh? Think you fucking know me because you know some of the girls I fuck? Huh? Which bitch told you?”
His string of questions and insults continued, your mind jumbled with ways of escaping the metal head. Maybe if I slip from under his arm. No, crap he can grab my neck. Maybe if I fake a phone call? No, he’s a druggie, not a dumbass. Maybe just lie. Yeah, that should do it.
“You even listening to me dipshit?”
Snapping out of your trance, you stood tall. No, I shouldn’t be scared of this fuckboy. If anything, he should be scared of me. Why should I ask Ms. Robin to take down my work? I worked hard on that and hell I’m proud of myself.
“Listen up here, goth wannabe.” The change of aura threw him off for a few seconds. As you stepped closer and closer to him, you jabbed your pointer on his chest with every phrase. “It’s not my fault you’re a fuckboy, alright? I did my analysis based on the prompts my professor wanted and I refuse to take crap from a privileged arrogant ass like you.”
You dusted off your jeans and brushed the hair back from your face, “Besides, my report doesn’t even mention your name, how sure are you that it’s really about you? If you felt attacked by my analysis, then that’s a personal problem. Now if you excuse me, I’m late to a meeting.” You shoved passed by him, leaving him gritting his teeth with his head hung low, knowing he lost. But, just because you lose doesn’t mean you should give up.
Something about you-- the sassiness, the boldness perhaps— draws him towards you. From that day forward, the tables have turned. From you stalking him to him stalking you, he turned to the mutual that helped create it all—Killer.
Killer did n o t want to be in the middle of this, should he help his best pal get closer to the girl he wants or should he be in love with the girl of his dreams and leave his best friend heartbroken? This is the first time Killer sees Kid genuinely interested in a girl, and not for a quick fuck.
Yardy know what Killer is gonna do— he meddles with his best friend’s love life. Kid, ignorant to Killer’s feelings, merrily goes along with the advice dished out. It’s not like you’d like him, right? Kid was a better choice between the two of them, and you should always be with the best.
You noticed the sudden change with Killer’s attitude— his sudden interest with Kid and his distance really made you wonder if your crush was gay. Well, that’s not good!
Kid frequently drops by your dorm to drop you his home cooked food, that’s really good btw, and self-care packages. Killer comes by and leaves by a flower with anonymous love letters attached to them. Genuinely believing Kid and Killer were a thing, you thought the gestures were very sweet. Still not the man you wanted, but sweet.
Kid and Killer frequently text you, Kid still unaware that Killer contacts you consistently as well. He’d gush and brag about the interactions you shared together to Killer, who just nods along quietly.
Kid takes you out on dates too. Pays for the movie, the snacks, even the dress! What a fucking simp.
Kid decides to confess to you, not before consulting Killer first.
“Imma tell her today after class. ‘M gonna bring her a whole bouquet too.” Kid nonchalantly packs up his shit, preparing his stunt.
“What?? Today today?”
“Yuh,” responded Kid, swinging his bag over his shoulder and cooly waving his hand as he exits the room. No, if Kid was doing it today, Killer decided, me too. I wanna see what happens if I try.
Killer was done pushing his feelings to the side. Why should he have to subdue his feelings for someone else, even if they’re his best pal? What if you like him back?
“Y/n! I have something to tell you!” Killer screamed across the empty halls, knowing the exact spot the metal head was taking you. Just in time, he saw Kid confess.
“We’d be such a power couple if you were my girl.”
A sweet, gentle giggle left your throat, a hand covering your bashful face. “You’re cool dude,” your hand outstretched to pat his shoulder, “but I don’t see you like that... more like a friend, you know? I hope we can still be friends. And if you want, we can act like this never happened.” You spouted options to alleviate the embarrassment and disappointment written on his face.
“Bitch just kidding,” flabbergasted, but trying hard to keep his composure, he punched your shoulder. “I was just saying, not like I’d go for a small fry like you.”
“Bitchass.”
Killer felt relief in his chest— wow, his friend got rejected and he felt relieved? Best Friend of the Century.
Later that night, he snuck into your dorm by the window like Spider-Man, effectively scaring the shit out of you. After calming down, he worms his way to your bed with a tiny smile across his features.
He studied your face in the moonlight— softly parted lush lips with glossy eyes that matched the slightly disheveled hair atop your head. It was perfect. Killer wringed his hands together painfully, working his courage.
Mumbling, he slipped a very rushed confession from the tip of his tongue, inaudible to the ear.
“Huh?”
“I mean... you don’t have to accept my feelings. I wanna let it off my chest but I really like you y/n.” He sucked a breath while shutting his eyes, anticipating rejection.
Holding his chin and delicately bringing his eyes to meet yours, you leaned in and planted his lips against yours, and fell backwards due to his sudden jolts.
He pulled away, frantically trying to process if that was real or just one of his hyper realistic wet dreams again.
“Y-you like me back?”
“Duh, why else would I kiss you?”
“O-oh.”
“Be mine then?”
“I already am.”
76 notes · View notes
Spider-Man Life Story #1 Thoughts
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Well...this was odd.
I have profoundly mixed feelings about this story.
That is owed to this comic being a collision of so many different things.
It is a period piece. But period piece that only half uses the period.
And I mean that on two levels.
It’s a period piece in the more general sense because it is set in the 1960s. But it is also a Spider-Man period piece because it uses 1960s Spider-Man continuity.
And it only half uses both in both cases.
Basically this issue was Chip Zdarsky’s Spider-Man AU fanfic that is a giant what if deviating from the Romita era...that is also set in the 1960s.
That is honestly the only way I could sum up this story. And by the looks of it things are going to get MORE complicated next issue because we move into the 1970s which implies each issue will be set in a different decade and this is confusing because if Spider-Man’s history played out in real time starting in 1962 then modern stories would only maybe be in the early 1980s.
Basically I guess this is more a general What If series that each issue will be talking up topical issues from each decade.
Which is seriously NOT how this mini was advertised to readers so that sucks hard.
But okay AS what it actually is trying to be...is it any good.
The answer is...kind of.
There is more good than bad.
Now you all know I do not like Zdarsky’s work on Spider-Man, so when I say there is more good than bad I’m not damning with faint praise.
On a general sense, the pacing is REALLY good. A lot of story happens in one issue. Granted it’s extra length so maybe that is why. The dialogue is perfectly fine, nothing rings untrue to the characters’ voices (except Gwen but we’ll get there). There is a respectable amount of introspection and exploration on Peter’s part and this is THE best Mark Bagley art in a very long time.
IIRC Mark Bagley once said that when he did the Ultimate Clone Saga and got to draw Richard Parker, he modelled him upon Gil Kane’s take on Peter Parker from the 1970s, and felt he got closer to that than he was trying to do in his 1990s work. You can very much feel that here now that he’s drawing Peter in literally the same setting that Kane drew him in.
Okay lets talk about other things that worked.
·         Flash’s characterization and Peter’s relationship with him. It felt very realistic in spite of not being how things played out in the original comics
·         Norman Osborn was very much in character in being devious and frightening
  What didn’t work.
·         Peter’s quick assumption of Norman’s amnesia. He kind of just presumes Norman has lost his memory on the basis of little evidence. Now granted his spider sense later corroborates this, but it’s still...kind of lame. Especially compared to the original story in ASM #40 wherein Peter figured Norman lost his memories because he was referencing an event from his past that he’d just finished relaying to Peter.
·         The blurb at the start of the issue says Peter was 15 when he got his powers in 1962. And then we cut to 1966 where Peter says that this happened 4 years ago. On the very next page he claims he has a year left of collage. Er...what? Maybe I’m out of the loop on the American college system (in the 1960s) but if Peter was 15 in 1962 and it’s 4 years later then he’d be 19. Collage lasts four years meaning Peter wouldn’t be graduating for another 2-3 years (depending upon how close he is to turning 20). He should be in his FIRST year of college,  1965-1966, and would be graduating in 1969, the school year beginning in 1968. WTF?
·         Gwen. Zdarsky has constructed a conundrum for himself here. This is the Romita era Gwen but with shades of Ditko Gwen but also shades of more modern revisionist versions of her and Emma Stone and also he’s now taking her in a MASSIVE deviation from the established Spider-Man history. It’s all a mess, and speaks to where Zdarsky’s shipper flag is planted btw.
·         Peter’s attitude to Flash at his leaving party. In the original story, ASM #47 Peter in a wonderful moment of maturity held no grudge against Flash and wished him well sincerely. There was no ‘triggering’ on his part.
·         The focus upon other superheroes like
·         Frankly the fact that this is not clearly either a What If deviation from established history or a true blue period piece using the established lore.
 And really that is THE big dilemma with this story. It’s not really committing to being one of those things or the other and is as a result kind of compromising both things.
 It’d be one thing if Spider-Man’s history was going in starkly different directions as a RESULT of Zdarsky using the historical setting, like if Peter was drafted for example.
But that isn’t what happens. Gwen finding out Peter is Spider-Man and Peter turning in Norman Osborn are things that could have happened in any contemporary What If issues (if What If was around back then).
And it’s not that these are uninteresting deviations to explore, but they feel undercooked because the book is also examining Peter’s introspection about joining up to fight in Vietnam. And THAT stuff is really interesting too, the discussion with Flash and Captain America serving as opposing arguments for Peter’s decision is REALLY good.
But again it feels undercooked because we’ve got this plot about Norman Osborn knowing Peter is Spider-Man brewing.
And the thing is I can’t decide if it’s a case of the story itself being at fault or the advertising for it being flawed.
Let’s put aside discussions about whether the story being Spider-Man’s history just presented in real time would’ve been better than this or not.
The fact is it WAS sold to readers that way so when you view it through that lens all the What If deviations seem weird and out of place, like distractions.
But hypothetically if this was just advertised as a What If mini ‘What if Peter turned in Norman Osborn and Gwen found out he was Spider-Man before she died’ then the focus upon Vietnam would’ve felt much the same.
But I don’t know if the series advertising EXACTLY what this mini seems to be would’ve mitigated this sensation from the reader. Or if the story itself is just really just two types of stories glued together.
I suspect it actually is the latter though for two big reasons.
The Vietnam plotline places a lot of focus upon Captain America and Iron Man. Their conflict is in fact the shocking cliffhanger of the entire issue. So you know...something that isn’t about Spider-Man himself. That felt more like Zdarsky trying to do Watchmen but in the Marvel universe. Which gets complicated because that opens up a whole can of worms for the relative realism of the MU, not least of which being how could the heroes ever allow things in the war to get to the point that it did.
The other reason is that the deviations from established history aren’t done the way of a traditional What If, wherein the in-universe history is identical up to a certain point then a single change sets off a new direction.
Here Zdarsky is just remixing various different elements from Romita Spider-Man to create an impression of that era and then deviating from the ‘general knowledge’ of that era.
Norman dropping Harry off at school cribs from ASM #39, Norman’s amnesia cribs from ASM #40, Flash’s party cribs from ASM #47, the Scorpion and Spider Slayer stuff treats ASM #20 and #25 as big parts of the past but the threat of Jameson’s  exposure cribs from Stern’s 1980s run. Norman wanting Peter as his heir cribs from Revenge of the Green Goblin in the 2000s.
But these elements, much like Spider-Man: Blue, are not remixed in a way that chronologically line up with how things happened. They’re all jumbled together so now Norman found out who Peter was (somehow?) but kept that in his back pocket to bring it up at Flash’s party and then announced he wanted Peter as his heir.
It’s all so...weird.
Look it isn’t an uninteresting what if but it’s also like...just a fanfic basically.
Not badly written fanfiction but it’s also like...what point is there to this really besides BEING Zdarsky’s fanfiction?
Another problem is that this story, along with not fully committing to the period piece aspect, simultaneously plays things with an intrusive degree of hindsight and imposes revisionism.
I’ve already spoken about this with Gwen but it’s also true with Harry and Norman’s relationship being cribbed from the Raimi movies the incredibly obvious ‘Norman will kill Gwen!!!!!!’ foreshadowing along with the ‘Professor Warren is a bad guy’ stuff; to say nothing of how Warren’s character design is inaccurate to the period.
That stuff imposes a present day hindsight of the Romita era whilst also overlays that with truisms brought about by adaptations being in the zeitgeist.
This applies to the Vietnam war stuff too. The book frames the war in a way that we look back upon it as opposed to framing it the way people in 1966 America probably actually viewed it. The final page is the biggest example of this.
Finally...didn’t we JUST see this from Zdarsky with his time travel arc in Spec?
Like wasn’t this a very similar idea. Spider-Man’s history but deviated because Norman Osborn’s identity is exposed differently and Peter and Gwen wind up as endgame?
Over all I can’t say that I disliked this. But nor can I say I was that thrilled with it. It’s not what we were promised and honestly...what we were promised sounded a lot more compelling. Moreover there are much better examples of period piece superhero stories out there.
·         Spider-Man Blue frames the early Romita issues the way they might’ve happened in the 1960s as they existed rather than Marvel universe 1960s
·         ASM Annual 1996 is DeFalco, Frenz and Romita Senior presenting an untold tale so good it could be downright mistaken as being MADE in the 1960s
·         Busieck’s seminal Untold Tales of Spider-Man series as a whole
·         The last 2 issues of Webspinners by DeFalco and Frenz which serve as a lost arc from their 1980s era
·         X-Men: Grand Design
I think this is something you just gotta pick up and taste for yourself, but again...just be aware this isn’t what it was advertised as.
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onewfantaesy · 7 years
Note
Does taemin start treating jaejoong more like an uncle after he gets back? I love this au btw!
“I just need to go down to the school for a little bit to drop off a lesson plan and talk with the Principal. You’ll be okay here with Jaejoong for a little bit, won’t you?” Yunho asked Taemin a couple days after he came home. “You can come with me if you want, though.”
“I’ll be fine,” Taemin insisted. 
“We’re going to watch the fourth Harry Potter movie and eat pizza and cookies while you go to your boring teacher meeting,” Jaejoong teased, putting one hand gently on Taemin’s shoulder while the other pushed Yunho closer towards the door.
“I’ll text you when I get there and when I’m leaving,” Yunho promised Taemin. “If you need anything, you can text me. And I’ll bring the work you’ve missed, and we can work on it together when I get home, okay?”
“Okay,” Taemin said.
When Yunho came back home, the two of them were still on the couch watching the movie. Taemin was leaning his head back while trying to bite off a piece of pizza without ripping off all the cheese, and Jaejoong was laughing at the face Taemin was making. It seemed that today was one of Taemin’s better days.
“Please don’t choke on my couch,” Yunho said as he passed by the back of the couch to go put his bag and Taemin’s books on the dining table. 
Taemin only turned to stare at him with half of the cheese from his pizza dripping down his chin.
“Does it look like I’m choking?” Taemin asked, his words muffled around all the food in his mouth.
“Just please chew your food before you swallow it whole,” Yunho said. “And when your movie is over, you have a lot of homework you need to get started on.”
“I was literally kidnapped, almost murdered, and particularly traumatized, and I still have to do homework?” Taemin scoffed after he swallowed his pizza in one large gulp.
“Homework waits for no man,” Yunho teased him, going to lean over the back of the couch and kiss Taemin’s cheek. “I’ll help you with it, don’t worry.”
“Ugh, gross,” Taemin muttered, wiping his cheek on his shoulder. When Yunho smirked and held Taemin’s head gently and peppered his cheek in kisses, Taemin wrinkled up his nose and tried to pull away while laughing and saying, “Stop, stop! You’re so gross!”
“You need a haircut,” Yunho told him, pulling away and going to sit in between Taemin and Jaejoong.
“No I don’t,” Taemin said. “But I wanna dye my hair blue.”
Jaejoong snorted and leaned over to look at Taemin from around Yunho, “Yeah right, kid; tell us that again in a week.”
“I wanna dye my hair blue and I want a tattoo and I wanna pierce my ears,” Taemin said.
“Tell us that again in a week,” Jaejoong said, “and maybe we’ll consider letting you actually do it.”
“Not the tattoo, though,” Yunho said, looking at Jaejoong like he was crazy.
“I mean if he really wants one-”
“He’s fifteen!”
“He’s practically a little man.”
“You’re not even giving it a chance,” Taemin whined, making Yunho turn back to him. “What if it’s a heart on my arm that says ‘Uncle Yunho’ in the middle?”
“Read my lips, Taemin,” Yunho said. “No.”
Taemin just laughed and leaned back against the couch. Even though Yunho was horrified at the idea of his underage nephew getting a tattoo, he had to admit that he was happy Taemin was acting like his normal self.
He was back to being quiet and distant by the time Yunho told him to go to bed, but Yunho was glad for Taemin acting normal even for just an hour or two.
Three days after Yunho and Taemin moved in with Jaejoong, Yunho looked up from where he was grading papers at the kitchen table to see Jaejoong walk through the house with Taemin on his back. Taemin, who had been at Kibum’s playing with the dogs, had a smirk on his face and had his right arm wrapped around Jaejoong’s neck.
“Do I even wanna know what happened?” Yunho asked.
“He said his arm was hurting, so he couldn’t walk,” Jaejoong said, laughing as he looked to Yunho.
“Your arm was hurting,” Yunho repeated, looking at Taemin, “so you couldn’t walk?”
“It’s crazy how the body works,” Taemin said, still smirking. “So Jaejoong is going to put me on the couch and bring me dinner while I watch TV.”
“He is?” Yunho humored him, and Jaejoong continued towards the living room.
“We can eat dinner on the couch every now and again,” Jaejoong called behind him.
“Yeah, Uncle Yunho, we can eat dinner on the couch every now and again,” Taemin mimicked, muffling a laugh in Jaejoong’s shoulder. As Jaejoong lowered him onto the couch, Taemin gripped the back of his shirt. “Hey, hey, be careful with me! I’m precious cargo!”
“And what does this precious cargo want for dinner?” Jaejoong asked, turning around to see Taemin lying in a heap on the couch.
“I don’t know, what do we have?”
“I don’t know, what do you want?”
“How can I know what I want if I don’t know what we have?”
“I’ll make you a sandwich.”
“That’s not dinner!”
“Then tell me what you want.”
Yunho just laughed as he listened to the same conversation he usually had with Taemin go on without him. Jaejoong ended up making frozen toaster waffles for all of them, and Taemin looked very pleased as he sat with his plate on his lap watching TV. 
“Technically, this is breakfast,” Jaejoong told Taemin as he sat down on the other side of the couch.
“Haven’t you ever heard of breakfast for dinner?” Taemin asked, shoving a forkful of syrup-drenched waffles into his mouth. “Did Uncle Yunho tell you what happened to me at lunch today?”
“No, what?” Jaejoong asked, turning and looking between the two of them with a worried expression.
“The toast I packed to have for lunch,” Taemin said, turning to Jaejoong with the saddest look on his face, “turned back into bread!”
“The condensation inside the baggy he put it in made it all soggy by the time he opened it at lunch,” Yunho clarified.
“It became bread again! It was like if an old person suddenly turned back into a baby!”
Jaejoong’s shoulders shook as he laughed, and he had to put his hand over his mouth to keep from laughing too loud.
“It’s not funny, it was really sad!”
“Why did you pack toast for lunch?” Jaejoong asked, trying to calm down. “I thought you were eating that for breakfast?”
“Because I wanted it,” Taemin said. “And all I got was a bag of soggy disappointment.”
“You’re too much,” Jaejoong laughed, shaking his head.
“What’s too much was the five bucks I had to spend at the vending machines because of it,” Taemin whined. “That’s three-seventy-five more than I usually spend!”
“What are you spending a dollar-twenty-five on every day?” Yunho asked, turning his head to Taemin.
“Gummy worms,” Taemin said. “Unless they’re out, then I spend it on Starbursts. Ugh, one time I had to get Skittles, though; that was depressing.”
“Why are you buying candy every day?” Yunho asked him.
“Because I can.”
“You know we can just buy that stuff in bulk for you if you want,” Jaejoong offered.
“Where’s the fun in that?” Taemin asked. “I like the thrill.”
“Of going to a vending machine?” Yunho clarified.
“No, of seeing if they actually have what I want.”
“I don’t know if I like you eating candy every day like that,” Yunho said.
“Oh, where’s the harm in it?” Jaejoong asked. “He’s fine, let him live a little.”
Taemin just smirked and shoveled another forkful of waffles into his mouth.
“You promised we would watch it,” Taemin said, frowning at Yunho and Jaejoong.
“I’m not saying we’re not going to watch it,” Jaejoong told him. “I’m just saying that it comes on late, and maybe we should record it and watch it tomorrow.”
“No,” Taemin whined, folding his upper body over the kitchen counter. “It’s the first episode of the season, all my friends are gonna watch it tonight! They’re all gonna be talking about tomorrow at school! I can’t be the only one not to watch it, it’d be social suicide. Not to mention the stupid amount of spoilers Kai always tells because he doesn’t realize he’s doing it.”
“You can always just watch it in your room,” Jaejoong said, laughing.
At that, Taemin turned a large frown in Yunho’s direction.
“I told him he’s not allowed to watch it without us,” Yunho mumbled.
“Why not?” Jaejoong asked.
“It’s rated for mature audiences only!” Yunho argued. “He’s fifteen, not seventeen! I don’t want him watching it by himself.”
“I watched it by myself every other season before this,” Taemin tried to bargain.
“We will watch it tonight,” Yunho told him. “As a family.”
Later that night, not even halfway through the show, Yunho was holding onto Taemin, who was sitting between him and Jaejoong. Taemin was laughing at him and the show, and Yunho was starting to wonder how a kid could find a horror show so hilarious.
“It’s just a TV show,” Taemin told him at the commercial. “It’s not real.”
“The jump scares are very real,” Yunho told him.
Taemin just laughed again, and Jaejoong joined in as he put an arm around Taemin’s shoulders to rub Yunho’s arm.
Taemin continued to laugh as the show came back on, and he moved around to lean against Jaejoong’s side as he put his feet up on Yunho’s lap.
“Do that the other way,” Yunho mumbled, pulling Taemin to lean against his chest.
“Why?” Taemin laughed, but he went along with it and crossed his ankles on top of Jaejoong’s lap.
“Because I’m just gonna hold you real close while we watch this dumb show you’re so obsessed with,” Yunho told him, wrapping an arm around Taemin’s chest.
When there was another jump scare and Yunho flinched, Taemin snorted. Yunho just huffed and squeezed him a little tighter. 
Jaejoong shook his head at the both of them.
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latenightbotanist · 8 years
Text
I have feelings about the ode to joy and im going to dump them on you
At the time i am writing this part i have suffered through twenty two (22) hours of “ode to joy” repeated in my brains so you are gonna suffer with me now. Srsly, ask @madgronkish i kinda lost it around noon.. Anyways. First thought when i heard it was literally" theyre not going to fucking reunite them to THAT SONG??!?!“ Whilst i was wrong about sherlock driving the car…they still did that. Thanks mofftiss.
Ok now down to business. First off, DISCLAIMER, i am in no way qualified to do this? I dont know much about music and have like half an experience at writing meta? so..sorry in advance, maybe just look at this as inspiration and well..gay feelings bc i have enough of those to go around rn.
I will also tag some lovely people who actually know how to do this whole meta thing, and who knows, maybe one of you actually reads this mess and makes somethin out of it? Possibly? Idk, i dont blame you if you dont, really. @quietlyprim @loudest-subtext-in-tv @joolabee @hudders-and-hiddles @love-in-mind-palace @teapotsubtext @beejohnlocked @kinklock @marcelock @gaytectives @ormondsacker @culverton
So.. for all of you who dont know, ode to joy (originally “freude, schöner götterfunken”) is part of beethoven’s 9th symphony, it is the first ever symphony to incorporate voices, the lyrics mostly come from schillers “Ode an die Freude” and the melody itself has been the european anthem since 1972 (1985 if you insist on EU).
Ok so lets have a quick look at the lyrics(and i really mean quick, these are my notes from this morning, not exactly coherent but enough to get a general idea of my feelings about this, we’ll get into more detail later) i also put both the english and german version bc i felt at some points things got lost in translation, but honestly i dont know what to do about that so yeah, if you speak german, good for you, if not and by the end if this youre not bored to death and still have questions dont hesitate to ask i will awkwardly but gladly try to elaborate (this applies not only to lyrics btw)
O Freunde, nicht diese Töne!

Sondern laßt uns angenehmere anstimmen,

und freudenvollere.
/
Oh friends, not these sounds!

Let us instead strike up more pleasing

and more joyful ones!
(Literally lets have happier stories, also the score.. yes lets get the johnlock theme back,please)
Freude!
Freude! / Joy!
Joy!
Freude, schöner Götterfunken

Tochter aus Elysium,

Wir betreten feuertrunken,

Himmlische, dein Heiligtum!

Deine Zauber binden wieder

Was die Mode streng geteilt;

Alle Menschen werden Brüder,

Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.
/ Joy, beautiful spark of divinity,

Daughter from Elysium, 
 
We enter, burning with fervour,             (Cant set the heart on fire if its
 
heavenly being, your sanctuary!              already burning w/ love, yall)

Your magic brings together 

what custom has sternly divided.               (Gayyyy!!!!!)

All men shall become brothers,           (Secret brothers,reunion…)

wherever your gentle wings hover.      
(Idk, mrs hudson is an angel?)
/
Wem der große Wurf gelungen,

Eines Freundes Freund zu sein;
 
Wer ein holdes Weib errungen,

Mische seinen Jubel ein!

Ja, wer auch nur eine Seele

Sein nennt auf dem Erdenrund
!
Und wer’s nie gekonnt, der stehle

Weinend sich aus diesem Bund!
/
Whoever has been lucky enough.         (Luckiest man in the world,

to become a friend to a friend,                 my only friend, … ) 
 Whoever has found a beloved wife,

let him join our songs of praise!               (Uh….how bout no?)

Yes, and anyone who can call one soul

his own on this earth!                                       (My john…..)

Any who cannot,
let them slink away
from this gathering in tears!   (Mary crying,then disappearing)
/
Freude trinken alle Wesen

An den Brüsten der Natur;

Alle Guten, alle Bösen

Folgen ihrer Rosenspur
.
Küsse gab sie uns und Reben,

Einen Freund, geprüft im Tod;*
(Like.. sherlock died and
 came back for john what more proof??)
 Wollust ward dem Wurm gegeben,
 
Und der Cherub steht vor Gott. 
Every creature drinks in joy

at nature’s breast;

Good and Bad alike

follow her trail of roses.                  (Good and bad, rosie, hmmmm)

She gives us kisses and wine,

a true friend, even in death;              (Or only in death?hey mary)

Even the worm was given desire,     (Mycroft? Nah,probs moriarty)

and the cherub stands before God.    (Sherlock, my lil cherub)
/
Froh, wie seine Sonnen fliegen
Durch des Himmels prächt'gen Plan,
 (Plans…ominous)

Laufet, Brüder, eure Bahn,
 
Freudig, wie ein Held zum Siegen.
Gladly, just as His suns hurtle

through the glorious universe,

So you, brothers, should run your course,             (the way it was always

joyfully, like a conquering hero.                                  meant to be…..) 
/
Seid umschlungen, Millionen!

Diesen Kuß der ganzen Welt!

Brüder, über’m Sternenzelt

Muß ein lieber Vater wohnen.

Ihr stürzt nieder, Millionen?

Ahnest du den Schöpfer, Welt?

Such’ ihn über’m Sternenzelt!

Über Sternen muß er wohnen.
/
Be embraced, you millions!

This kiss is for the whole world!             (,!!???? Like???????Yes pls)

Brothers, above the canopy of stars

must dwell a loving father.                                (Or two? Hey dads)

Do you bow down before Him, you millions?

Do you sense your Creator, o world?

Seek Him above the canopy of stars!

He must dwell beyond the stars.
Well that was……….. kinda gay. Yeah yeah i know its just a queer reading no i dont believe it was intended to be gay by either beethoven or schiller (or was it?? Irdk) but. in the context of the show. which is rather what were looking at. Pretty damn gay, right?
Ok lets have a look at my absolute favourite lines first:
Your magic brings together/what custom has sternly divided.
Well… i think we can all agree that society has, quite sternly indeed, divided holmes and watson, romantically. Homosexuality just simply wasnt a custom, or at least very frowned upon, mildly speaking. It is rather magical to watch this wrong being righted though, i should think. More specifically in bbc sherlock, the divide has come through a custom of not speaking to each other, and guess what?? Yeah hudders is friggin done with that bs these two are talking now!
And then…
Be embraced, you millions!/This kiss is for the whole world!
*shrieking* do i? Do i really need to talk about this? I think not. This just…. yeah. I mean really….. I would like to add at this point that, at least to my ears, embraced sounds like a rather tame option of translation. “Umschlungen”, to me personally conveys a certain vigour, almost as if the embrace might… idk.. come as a surprise to some extend? Take the air from some peoples lungs? Yeah dunno what that could be about……
If you still need more i guess i could just blubber some more about it all but tbh what is structure? so yeah, here we go, feel free to leave anytime i mean its already pretty gay and hurts my heart i wont blame you if you think 
•WE ARE NOW ENTERING THE REALM OF JOY… yep thats happening things are getting happy, please, god, let them actually. And this joy that we will feel when John and Sherlock ( finally) get together will mend all the wrong thats been done to those two, and us Holmes fans, during all these years of being kept apart by society and norms and customs, homophobia and heteronormativity. Were entering a sanctuary, we are literally save here!
•General message of schiller’s ode to joy is literally that HUMAN CONNECTIONS ARE THE CROWN OF HUMAN EXPERIENCE like wow yes thank you it is as if human connections were the stuff that…completes you as a human being. Say what? 
•Not only is this true for johnlock but also for our entire community, were bound together by the joy of this show, our joy will mend what heteronormativty destroyed, the joy of their kiss will unite us, we will embrace it and the joyfull gayness will embrace us! 
 •The fact that its literally such a groundbreaking piece of music. There have been symphonies over and over but this is new, this is different, he incorporated voices. Groundbreaking,earthshattering… u get it. Seriously if anyone who has even a slither of a clue about music wants to educate me on what the inclusion of voices could stand for please im begging enlighten me my brains too fried im already struggling to get this done(as you might be able to tell. I am so sorry)
 And now, onto some more shit i stumbled upon in the original poem that, sadly, didnt make it into the song but: 
•Have patience for a better world to come, god(mofftiss) is good and will give you what you deserve
•Forget hatred and revenge, forgive your (arch)enemy who shall not have to cry or be rueful (ahem mary. Also possibly mycroft to some extent who knows whats gonna happen) 
•Bravery even in agony,help where innocence is weeping (hi john) 
•Something about oaths and telling the truth to your friends as well as enemies and how lies will bring everything down…… 
•Narrowing the circle, making oaths with wine and staying faithful(keep believing!!) 
•Salvation from tyranns, hope to the dying, mercy in council, forgiving of sins and ENDING HELL well ok then yes to all! 
 No honestly theres a lot and im horrifically underqualified and have a headache so i’ll stop now. If you actually read this whole mess of a thing.. thank you. Bless your soul. I’ll make you an origami elephant or something
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wehveechen · 6 years
Text
On the nature of MadNes
I realized that I always scream about Madnes without ever explaining the deeper underlying mechanisms and feelings/thoughts that sit at the heart of this dynamic so here. Have unnecessarily detailed explanations on their messy relationship. I put it under a read more because I accidentally wrote an essay smh.
There is layer one, prestige. Ignes is... moderately attractive. Not the hottest noble he ever met, but good enough. More importantly, having her is a big  "Fuck you" @ everyone. Roctis, who had the largest faction in the union .Yeah look I got your precious daughter now. The best Union scientist they had left (or at least so he thinks). And well. a noble clan leader. essentially, she is moderately prestigious enough. Not a "first choice" like Lunark, but she is a passable second choice. Layer two. part one :  Maduke projects onto her. She kills without mercy, she even enjoys it. The strong rule, even if it means they take the lives of the weak. This is a belief they share. Also, the parallel, of him not becoming Faelan's successor instead of Muzaka and her not inheriting the clan weapon for such a long time. He tries to draw parallels. He wants to see himself in her, and he wants it to be loveable. Well. Loveable. He wants someone who understands him. Someone who can see his true face and acknowledge it. Unlike Lunark, he does not need to hide his true self, because his true self and her self are alike. A monster does not fear another monster. Which leads to layer two part two: part two: he has power over her. Unlike Lunark, Ignes is an outsider wherever she goes. The Union is turning so human-centric, they will not make her an elder anyway. she has no power. the nobles are her enemies. The werewolves see her as an intruder. Essentially, Ignes maneuvered herself into a corner in which she depends on his goodwill. Unless madam wishes to live as a hermit somewhere in the himalaya. or something. he enjoys this power. Lunark was well respected in the Union and even more respected among the werewolves (before the whole modification story...). which means she was out of his reach. her word had weight. His power over his subjects is not absolute. he cannot just go and do whatever he wants with key members of the pack without upsetting others too much. Ignes? like who cares what happens to her. Ignes' word and opinion on him mean nothing to anyone. 
Ignes is just this extremely alluring combination of powerful fighter, competent scientist, sadistic monster and .... a child. As Lunark would call her, she is a child in the body of a woman. Ignes is immature, she depends a lot on others, she is aimless, she is scared, she is emotional, she is easy to control. He does not want a partner who is his equal. he wants someone he can control, someone he can mold the way he wants,  or at least that's his idea of her. Someone he can use easily. Her immature personality and her absolute lack of social and political influence paired with superficial assets like knowledge and physical power make her just right. She clearly has no idea what she's doing and that's just right.  As adressed before, Ignes lacks influence. Her opinion has no consequences. And.. she is supposed to be  like  him. which means... as innocent as this sounds, he can be himself with her. Something all living beings strive forward of course, his true self is sadistic, narcissistic, abusive and the whole jazz, but like, girl will just have to live with that. This, a dynamic similar to neskreia, is liberating. He does not have to act around her. or at the very least, he eventually stops doing so. This, of course, unlocks a whole load of other issues because... this man is lonely. he starts thawing. Even though he is a fucking monster, he is also just a man. A lonely man with an ugly personality who knows no one will ever love him for who he really is. But like... once you start opening up to someone, how do you stop?He cannot dehumanize her like he did with Garda. She is not a prisoner who is not meant to ever see the light of day again. And neither is she Mirai(or urne, who is dead. rip).  ... like... if he wants it superficial and meaningless, that's what he has them for.  Essentially, yeah, that bitch absolutely only got himself to blame. get cozy and intimate with someone you cannot treat like some sort of object or animal and you risk catching feels.
And at some point he realizes... shit. He likes her. Like, of course, he hates her, but damn he likes her. he fucking hates her because wow shit he got emotionally attached? how  dare  she make him feel emotions he had no intentions of ever feeling at any point in time. Look at what love brought to others. His Uncle (who was murdered by his brother.) Muzaka. Roctis. And probably many more. LOVE  NEVER DID ANY GOOD FOR ANYONE IN THE HISTORY OF EVER And just... he hates her for that. She is a liability. Even if she has no power over him, she is a liability and... he wants to kill her. He wants to see her dead, best at his own hands, while he still can. But he... cannot. And this makes him hate her even more. The more he loves her, the more he hates her.He hates her, because he is a weak bitch, essentially. He knows that he should get rid of her while he still can, and with her, get rid of the last part of his heart that is capable of something that is not hate, disgust, contempt, malicious joy, greed, pride -  Now that he got a taste ,though... of affection... of holding someone and calling them  yours ...  he cannot stop. he cannot deprive himself of that. And so instead, she must be broken. She cannot be trusted, this wild thing, but then again, no one can be trusted. This is kind of at the heart of what really drives him into his incredibly toxic, abusive behaviour towards her: for one, he is a fucking sadist who enjoys inflicting pain, and two, he is just... well. He has seen that not even Ignes can love him,. (uhm... she is a lesbian... and... she has more of a bad bitch persona than actual nature...) so... she must break. Melt her like a candle and mold the wax into something nice. because this is the only way he will ever, truly have someone: in shards he can cradle in his arms  Ignes is supposed to essentially satisfy all of his emotional needs, while he simultaneously hates her for satisfying his emotional needs because he wants more and more and yeah he hates himself and that's why he hates herit's all Ignes' fault, obviously.Not his own awful character. never. ever. as if. The witch bitch is to blame. 
And some more additional thoughts regarding Ignes’ perspective on all this. 
I would like to start this off with the fact that coming to Maduke was not her first choice. In my HCs, she spent the many chapters between roctis' death and her reappearing on WW island looking for Lagus in places she knew he used to have laboratories and, at her wits' end, she turns to maduke. She learns of Lagus' death from Maduke too, btw. She comes to him in a very difficult time of her life. She is just now realizing that she is alone. That's adulting for you. She longs for purpose, for protecting, for guidance, and initially she meant to go and look for it from Lagus. And so she stays with Maduke instead, who is the only one with enough power to protect her from the wrath of the Noblesse and the nobles in generla. the union is a sinking ship, no point in bothering with them.
Anyway. Obviously, she uses Maduke for his power and ressources. She knows he is a monster - but that's her main mistake when interacting with him: she assumes he is a reasonable man who will act in a consistent manner. We have several examples of her completely being way off the mark in her predictions about his behaviour in MoLM (both positive, when he apologized to her, as well as negative, when she was mistaken about Gaura). She hopes to be able to harness him. He needs  her expertise. she has a know how the werewolf scientists did not have until now. And... she thinks she is safe because of that. that's also why she kept him at bay. sex is meaningless. it's just two bodies mashing together. That's nothing special. But she did not want to fire all her bullets prematurely. She did not expect this to backfire but... yeah. The main reason she rejected him was because she did not want to give him everything he wants too easily. She needs to keep some cards up her sleeve for when he got his superwerewolf army.
( I can write a whole essay on what about  MoLM's chapter "Love" really hit, it was not the physical aspect, but... yeah. i will stay kids friendly and skip over that) in this AU she is mostly just "oh shit... " because she missed her opportunity to slip away. The original plan to just leave during the whole chaos kinda got broken by the fact that she simply does not get another opportunity to easily get away. And.. more importantly... she knows Maduke is too proud to just let her _ go _ . Which means, she is not safe as long as he lives, not safe as long the nobles have a major fucking grudge against her, but that is a whole other can of worms
I genuinely think.. this could have been a real ship. I mean, still a dysfunctional one with no attraction or anything from her, but... it's not to be loved. When the whole world hates you, isn't it nice when there is at least one person who doesn't?
What follows is a lot of stockholm and trauma that does not reflect her personality or anything so this is where i quit thank you for coming to my ted talk
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New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
"New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
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New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
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i was caught going 20 on a 15. i was driving my friends car will her insurance go up now?..i am on her insurance since we live togeather. does anyone know how much this ticket will cost me i am in las vegas
Cost of car insurance in michigan with the full time driver being 18?
what is the cost of car insurance for 1 year in ichigan with the full time driver being 18? can you tell me where you found this?
Is the American health insurance is like Car insurance?
Life insurance and all the other insurances? And you pay it every month and how much? Or what it's like?
How much would the car insurance cost for a 19 year old? UK?
I do not want to have my parents on the insurance as I am at university in a different city, so this wouldn't be legal in the first place. I am male,19 and have had my licence for 3 months. I have received some ridiculous quotes for fiesta 1.2, corsa 1.0, golf 1.4, focus 1.4.All of them were over 3500 and up to 6000 for some of the cars. Thanks a lot!""
How much is medical insurance?
How much would medical insurance cost in Ohio (approximately) for 2, 30 years olds and one baby?""
How much money should I budget for insurance on a car dealership?
My bank needs an estimate for a car dealership insurance but the insurance company is taking forever? HELP!? I've been trying to get a hard insurance quote for over 2 months. they keep coming back with more questions because i'm doing a slightly unique business model. Thats fine and all, I understand why and that doesn't bother me, but what the problem is that the bank said they won't submit my loan app to the SBA until I have at least a rough insurance estimate in my cash flow, and the insurance companies I'm talking to (2) won't give me a rough idea at all! I don't know if its $2500 a year or $500,000 per year. Can anyone who knows anything about business insurance or car dealerships give me an idea within $5000-$10k of what I might want to budget for? Could it be 1/2 a million? or is it likely going to be more like 10 or 20k per year? Total inventory will not exceed $65,000 and we will also have a two service bays. Thanks!""
""How much does car insurance cost for 21yr old, is it monthly or yearly?""
I am new to US. I stay in Los Angeles, CA. I have never driven before. And I am talking about a pre-owned car probably a 90s or 2000 model of toyota. Would appreciate if you'd answer with an estimate.""
How much does learning to drive cost roughly?
how much do driving lessons + car (800 - 1000) + insurance etc cost??? thanks :)
New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
Aren't health insurance companies allowed to sell across state lines?
I had health insurance in Texas from a company in Oklahoma. United Healthcare sells insurance in all 50 states, I believe. Why are people that are against health care reform claiming that health insurance would be cheaper if companies were allowed to sell across state lines? Also, if their claims is true, who would regulate it, the states through their insurance commissioners or the feds through a national insurance commissioner? I'm not interested in the politics of health care reform, just don't understand what people are talking about since I have had a different experience.""
How much would it cost for monthly insurance on a Dodge Viper 2009?
Im doing a math project at school and we have to buy a car. What would the approximate cost be to insure it monthly?
Car insurance ?
ok heres my problem. i am 18 and i just finished a drivers ed program i want to get my license but i cant because in order to take the road test to get my full license (not a learners) i need a car on which i am insured but i cannot buy a car because in order to even buy a car you need to have some one in the house which you live in who has car insurance and no one in my family drives so they dont have insurance as you can see im in a cycle that i cant get out of... what do i do?
Health Insurance for 18 going to 19 year old?
My boyfriend is currently 18 years old. In January he will turn 19. He has no health insurance.We live in Texas. He's currently working/has his own income but still lives in his grandma's home. He started working making roughly about 250-300 every week, this has however only been for half the year before he was only making minimum wage. Should he get insurance from where he works? Or can he qualify for Medicaid or something of that sort? How does insurance work when you move out also?? Who qualifies for Medicaid? How? We're honestly clueless about all this, and no one has given us information. I've tried doing online research but it's all confusing.. I was hoping someone would help me out. Anything will help. Thank you.""
Car insurance for new driver?
im looking for car insurance but all of them are over 22,000 but i herd from alot people that its would be 1000 and all my friends pay about 1000 so why is it so expensive?? i live in london and im 19 yers old, i passed my driving test last week.""
How do i obtain individual short term disability insurance?
I got an offer from a small firm but they do not offer short term disability insurance. I want to have one just incase I get pregnant and need to take a maternity leave so I get paid during the maternity leave. I've called few insurance companies and they dont do individual short term disability insurance? What's my best option? Any ideas? Thanks
Car insurance question?
okay my boyfriend just got his drivers license today..he doesnt have a car yet and he wants to be able to drive my grandmas car to work whenever he can but she says he cant because hes not on her insurance. Does it matter whether or not hes on her insurance? what could happen?
Insurance For a 1968 Ford Falcon?
Can anyone give me a serious quote of what the insurance would be for 16 year old driver on a 1968 Ford Falcon. Also what would be the quote for a 48 year old driver in Northeastern, Ohio.""
How much money does car insurance go down when you turn 17?
I'm 16 years old and turning 17 in a few months. I am currently paying about $435 for insurance in a 6 month period. Will that rate decrease when I turn 17, not having any tickets or accidents?""
Insurance for expecting baby?
Where can I get free / low cost health insurance for my expecting baby? In louisville, Ky ???? Please help!!! Im 18.""
How bad would a honda civic hatchback (94) be on insurance?
Male 17 North Carolina any ideas on a monthly and yearly price?
My cousin's car got into an accident. How much would the insurance company cover?
My cousin had an accident a few weeks ago. He accidentally bumped his car in the rear of another car. The rear part of the other car is wrecked. The other car is covered by an insurance. How much would my cousin have to pay? Will he need to pay anything given that the car is insured? Please help, I don't know much about insurance and I want to help my cousin""
How much would full coverage insurance cost on a 1965 Silver Cloud 3 Rolls-Royce?
Male driver, clean driving history.""
Are you glad you have individual Health Plan?
I work freelance and I am looking into getting a health care plan. I haven't had medical insurance since elementary school but now that I'm approaching mid 20s, I wanted to prepare for the emergency, the 'just-in-case' situation. My problem is that I have a very negative impression on the insurance business and health care itself. I've gone to health clinic from a floating rib and I paid $300 to be told that I need to get tylenol LOL My relatives and friend went through some misdiagnose, multiple exams and charges. Some friends go through such a bull5hit time - one friend was charged $500 to borrow a blanket in the waiting room at a health care clinic and all she had to do was make a call and complain to cancel the full amount. We were baffled So.. they get paid $500 for lending a blanket? They take the $500 away if we complain? It's like complaining at a restaurant LOL!!! I maybe ignorant, but it makes me so upset to see people without insurance having such a hard time affording health care. Health care and insurance makes me feel like I'm giving into a manipulative scam - like buying a $120 clothing that only costs $5 to make. But incase I break my face crashing on my bicycle, I guess I need one. $500 for a blanket? I wonder how much X ray actually costs to buy, operate, and maintain. I'm sick to my stomach thinking about it. Anyhow, I know I'm ignorant, please enlighten me. Any positive experience on having affordable individual plan would be great. Thanks in advance.""
TEENS: Car insurance question!?
Kinda random but here we go. 1 How much do you pay a month for insurance? 2 How old are you? Male or Female? 3 Do you pay for it or do your rents help? thanks!
Title insurance on grant deed in California?
For California, if a Grant Deed was signed and notarized more than 1 year ago, and it was not recorded until today, will the Title Company provide title insurance for it when the house is sold later on? Is the rule on this the same for all title companies or is it up to each title company, in terms of the gap for when it was signed and when it was recorded?""
I'm shopping for health insurance. And I'm confused.?
I had health insurance until recently when my employer took it away. I have some questions : a $2,500.00 deductible....does that mean I have to pay $2,500.00 of my bills before the insurance kicks in? What does 80/20 mean? I *thought * it was illegal to be turned down for insurance for pre-existing conditions, but some of the policies I have looked at say pre-existing conditions will not be covered.""
Do some states require car insurance before a drivers license?
I'm 20. The reason I don't have a drivers license yet is because my mom tells me that in order to even have a drivers license, you also have to be on some kind of insurance--which is expensive. so is this true or can I acquire a license without insurance, just to have one? I live in Georgia by the way. Tried to look it up myself but couldn't really find an answer. thanks.""
""Teen car insurance,HELP!!!!!?""
im going to get my license in december, and i want a 2008 honda civic hybrid, im going to be 16 by then, my gpa is 4.0, and im a female, live in california, and how much will be my insurance approximately if the car is under my parent's? and what do i have to bring on the day of my road test other than my permit and my drivers training completion certificate? thx""
Insurance payments on a car?
Okay so to start off i am 16 as of today. I will get my permit today and in one year I will turn 17. I will then have my license. So when I turn 17 i will be able to buy my own car with a $5000 down payment with the choice of a car. But here is where I am stuck. I do not know too much on information on car insurance. I know that I will be under my parents policy from here until I am 17. Lets say that there is 5 of us under this car insurance, no one has a separate policy, all under one umbrella. What happens when I buy a car, I get insured with a new car, my own car, and still under the policy things with my family. How much is it going to be per month? Can you average it? Here is a list of cars I will choose from, and if you can, provide estimated prices per month I will have to pay. - (2008-2010) BMW 3 Series Sedan (No mods or extra horsepower, plain performance) - (2006-2011) Mazda RX-8 Coupe (same, no mods or any fancy performance stuff) - (2008-2011) Mazda 3 or MazdaSpeed3 (sedan) - (2008-2011) Volkswagen Jetta (sedan) - (2008-2011) Subaru Impreza (hatchback) Also I am an A-B student with an above 3.5 GPA Also I will take a drivers ed course at school""
If you accidentally hit someone with your car how much does your insurance premium increase?
By hit someone, I mean a pedestrian.""
Is it illegal to not have car insurance?
and if it's not illegal, what am i getting confused with?! i always thought it was illegal....? my friend is getting his car and he said it's a crappy car so there isn't any need to insure it. ???""
How much does it cost to insure this car?
Im 17 years old and im planning on buying a car soon and the car i want is a 2002 Acura RSX, but i heard it expensive to insure? I havent been in any accidents no tickets. Iv had my license for more than year. And I live in the state of IL. My dad is planning on putting my name in his insurance as well and i just want to know how much it would cost to insure this car? We have state farm. Oh yeah another question since we are talking about insurnace do they give you an option to pay every month or every six months?""
Car Insurance question....?
Ok, so I'm 24 about to turn 25(apparently that's when your taken out of the pool , or so I've heard, which means my rates should lower.) However my insurance will expire before I turn 25, and there will be about a 3 month gap between those dates. I was wondering if I could get car insurance to cover those 3 or so months, or would I have to buy a 6 month and then get another quote later?""
Got my first speeding ticket. How much will my insurance go up?
I was on my way to work and I got clocked at 65 mph in a 50 mph zone. I haven't told my parents and I am scared for when they find out. It's my first speeding ticket and even the first time I had ever been pulled over. The ticket was for $103.33. I paid for it and it is all taken care of I think. I was driving my mom's new car. My brother has had a lot of traffic tickets on the same insurance too, but not the same car. So how much do you think the insurance is going to go up? Or do you think it is going to go up at all?""
New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
New Palestine Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46163
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