#i have no clue how to tag one of these thigns

[star-ocean-peahen]

*grumble grumble*

i just—grrrrr

mom's mad. mom's snippy because she's been looking after a small human with the attitude of a wasp all day. mom may be being slightly unfair to the medium human.

but DAD. really???? really. do you really need to stand there making gestures like "mom's mad right now listen to her" but not in a "mom's feeling upset right now" kind of way but a "your mom's being crazy again" kind of way?? you've definitely never taken any of your kids aside and tried to help them UNDERSTAND why people behave a certain way when theyre upset or EXPLAIN how to react to someone being mad and taking it out on you!! nah you're just going with a "your mom's fucking up and acting crazy again" kind of reaction. the medium human would not have such a problem with her if you didnt encourage them!!! you imply the kids are depressed and emotionally disregulated because she shut them out but you never modeled proper conflict resolution or emotional regulation!! why would you act like its HER fault when its BOTH of your faults?????

but NOOOOOO......................................*sigh* because you were never given these tools yourself and it's not fair to expect you to know how to do things you've never done. because its not actually possible for you to do better yet without significant work and support. because i love you and im doing a shitty job of showing it when i blame you for things out of your control. i just. i keep sorting all the things he does around me into "problematic" and "being a great dad" and it trips me up so much when he does something that makes me feel loved and makes me laugh and makes me feel like i have my dad but then a few minutes later he does something that i identify as a source of confusion and hurt.........................ugh. i hate this.

it's hard to reconcile how he's made me feel safer than anyone else ever could and how he's scared me + made me worry. Like, i have a very sweet and secure memory of him singing me to sleep but also i have the memory where he told me another country could hit us with a WMD at any time and because of where we live we'd be the first to die. that wasn't a necessary thing i needed to know at ten, if it was even true. but he's come through for me when i needed him so so so so so many times. but he did something that traumatized me. but we can banter and talk for hours and laugh and laugh and laugh. but he's the best teacher ive ever had. but i can count the times he's praised me for my work on two hands. but he understands how im feeling in really important moments. but he'll observe me get so upset im uncontrollably sobbing and do nothing. but he accepts the weirdest and most bizarre parts of me. but i have to walk on eggshells around him. but i know he's incredibly proud of me. but im terrified of disappointing him. but i know without a doubt that he loves me so, so much. but he's hurt me.

its. hard to know what to do with that.

[lucigoo]

Weekly Roundup: 21st April - 28th April

Did we all have a good week? Mine was much better, so hopefully yours was too. You alll deserve the best of weeks ever <3

I only worte 10,844 words this week, but with that I have 3 fics written and posted. and one has the biggest treat possible. Check out this art by @hobbityalse for the TSF fest and give them all the love they (And Thorin, Bilob, FIli, Kili and Frodo deserve)

So, on to recs:

Makes the Whole World Blind - Chrononautical - The Hobbit (Bagignshield, I love when they are feral for one another)

Summary: Bilbo Baggins has been kidnapped. Thorin Oakenshield considers a proportional response.

Nori Needs a Burglar - SunnyRose - The Hobbit @sunnyrosewritesstuff (Bagginshield, this is so clever and Bilbo getting caught in shennanigans accidently is *chef'f kiss*)

Summary: In charge of distracting Bilbo from their party plans, Nori tells the hobbit about a problem they've been having in the treasury. Of course, Bilbo being Bilbo, he managed to stumble upon a conspiracy against the Crown.

Unbreakable - Fantasyinallforms - The Hobbit @fantasyinallforms (Bagginshield, ngl, im not usually fond of the sex pollen trope as a personal prefrence, but this one is done so well and its all about the feels, its wonderfuly written)

Summary: Bilbo and Thorin are captured coming back from a diplomatic mission to the elf king's halls. Their captures have no intention of killing the great Thorin Oakenshield outright; instead, they seek to break him and attempt to use Bilbo to do it.

Bruises on the Heart - thehufflepuffhobbit - The Hobbit (Bagginshield, oblivious idiots, i'm looking at you Thorin, is always such a delicious plotline)

Summary: 5 times Thorin noticed his soulmate’s bruises and 1 time he gave them one.

With a tie not easy to break - MiraHerondale - The Hobbit (Bagginshied woth alternate first meeting, this amount of sweetness isnt good for my heart)

Summary:

“Finally”, said the hobbit, frowning despite his rushing heart. “I was worried.”

The smial was deadly silent behind him, which was surprising, considering how loud the dwarfs had been moments prior. Yet he refused to turn around and check.

“Worried? I thought we were angry.”

Fic for Thauc with the prompts "Bilbo and Thorin met before the Quest, fell in love and got married (in secret or not). How does that affect the Quest?" and "Thorin and Bilbo having an awkward and terrible hookup in Bree several months before the quest and then meeting at the quest."

Clue-finder - TheGrayKnight - The Hobbit (Bagginshield, Bilob being accidently BAMF is brillaint)

Summary: Bilbo originally asked to meet with Balin to discuss what he could do to help restore Erebor. He had no idea Balin would turn it around and talk about dwarven courting customs.

Huh, it ended up being all Bagignshield this week. Not that thats a bad thign of course, hopefully at least one person finds something to read <3

Fili and Kili are the highlight of Thorin's life. Everyhting he does is so they and the other Ereborians can have a better life.

Now on to mine.

Everything I need is in this Armchair (Bagginshield, but Thorin-centric, I was honoured to be able to work with HobbityAlse and please check out their stunning artwork above)

Summary:

Dis is confused. Thorin should be happy, he is back in Erebor, his heirs are well. He has everything he ever wanted, right?

His whole life is shaken when they are stolen by slaver.

Sincerely, the Broken Hearted (Past Bagginshield, mind the tags, sad, MCD)

Summary:

So why is Dis' brother sad? As a younger sister it is her job to find out and help him if she can.

Back to the start, but this time together (Wolfstar, prompt #250 of @flashfictionfridayofficial, feel free to search the other writers works, its always amazing to see what direction and fandom people go in with the same prompt imo)

Summary: The occupents of Grimmauld Place are rushing to catch the Hogwarts Express. Its time to take a new trip on the train that hearlded so many changes in all their lives. This time they are going to catch it together.

[that-wizard-oki]

I’ve been seeing some very lovely shit about the wizard/morganthe in the tag in regards to The Wizard basically being at fault for Morganthe’s demise (along with spider being the one to push them to do so) and i just wanna add something I think about a lot

In the game, what’s implied to actually destroy Morganthe is her own power, which plays into the dialogue of other characters talking about how “ooohh she STOLE the power she has, she’s dripping with the stuff”, and the “lesson” of arc 2 being that, if you seek power, it will ultimately corrupt you.

Sooooo based off of that, you might be wondering “but oki, you always talking about how cool of a storytelling bit it is that the wizard is so hell bent on getting revenge on Morganthe, that, even once they learn about the horrors done to her and what she really is, they still end up killing her- why would you bring up that Morganthe essentially killed herself?”

And to that i address the quotations around the word “lesson” in arc 2; While sure, Morganthe’s attempt at conducting the Song of Creation was her demise, it’s important to remember that Morganthe did not willingly become shadow queen. The power she “stole” was infused into her. 

So, the initial lesson falls flat here because.... it wasn’t Morganthe not being able to control herself... she was literally UNDER control. Like sure, the power consumes her in the end- but it wasn’t because she was greedy, it was because she was literally and then injected with it- is was planned to have her be consumed by that shit.

And... here’s maybe something idk if I've talked about before but... this is the point where you realize... Spider seemed to have wanted Morganthe  out of the picture. Why? Well, it’s not stated directly of course (it’s spider c'mon), but the context clues of Morganthe ultimately refusing information to the shadow magic on something... shadow related... and the immedietly being infused with shadow magic... hmmmmmmm, sounds like spider tried to manipulate Morganthe through his followers to free him but it backfired but oooo now she KNOWS too much and needs to be taken care of... but the thign is? no one can kill her. She’s one of the most gifted wizards in the spiral, she REDISCOVERD shadow magic, and with spider imprisoned and only having his tendrils of the shadow web to work with... his new plan was set into motion: Make her a threat that some other, more powerful wizard cant ignore, i’ll offer help to that wizard, and they’ll free me because she’s so terrifying, and even if they can’t kill her, she’ll be SO overwhelmed with power that she’ll likely drown herslef in it by my hand.

Unfortunately, while the wizard was being gaslit and manipulated by Spider to go through with it... Morganthe would not have been backed into that corner and killed by the Song if it were not for the Wizard being the catalyst in everything literally poisoning Mroganthe. And not only do they have to grapple with the fact that they were used by Spider so maliciously, not only do they have to grapple with the fact that Morganthe, their biggest enemy yet, was used so maliciously, but also the crushing guilt that comes with the fact that they KNEW all of that, went ahead with battling Morganthe, and at no point attempted to help her (which we also know how to de-infused shadow from physical bodies as shown after freeing old cob).

So... yea, just like, some added shit ontop of the mountain of “what the fuck” that is in Khrysalis I wanted to mention lol. 

[popculturebuffet]

Loud House Reviews: Racing Hearts

Welcome back errbody. Continuing the Salauna trilogy with Racing Hearts. We’ve already seen the cute asking them out story , now comes the actual first date.. which ITSELF is massively important. Keep in mind even though Nick fully supported L is for Love and the crew put a lot of work into it given how good it turned out, Sam easily still could’ve vanished into Limbo. For it’s first 2 seasons loud house, the show HAD continuity: Once Ronnie Anne and Bobby moved away to set up their spinoff, there was an episode with Lincoln’s friends trying to help him deal with missing her in the first ep giving any of them  besides Clyde focus, a trend that would continue, they still showed up via video chat or in person where waranted and there was a full episode about Lincoln’s group of friends trying to help him deal with it... which also reminds me of a smiliar episode of ned’s declassified that was really damn good but unrelated to this... seriously that show is underated and I hope with the Netflix deal it shows up there.  Anywho back on the show we’re actually talking about, the show didn’t really have arcs, thigns that carried from episode to episode.. until Season 3. Season 3 is where the show REALLY hit it’s stride, with it now fully being an ensemble show and more continuity injected int, not interfering iwtht he show’s episodic nature but making it feel like events had meaning. Stella was introduced in “White Hare” and later got a full introduction that i’ll no doubt cover with “Be Stella My Heart” and afterwords rather than being forgotten entirely like the show used to do became part of his friend group in their episodes. Lynn SR. was revealed to have quit his office job to work at a restraunt and was working on opening his own, which while only a two episode arc, lead to the opening of Lynn’s table in the finale and it’s stuck around since. And Leni got a job at a clothing store she’s kept since and friends at said job who’ve shown up since.  See i’m fine with a show not having heavy duty continuity or serilzation, some shows thrive there but I love it when shows do this: even if it’s not all about plots, things progresing or being followed up on makes the show feel more vibrant and keeps it from stagnation in my book.  And as as show with a bunch of girls at dating age, it was invetivible theird’ be recurring romantic arcs, hence Chaz is mentoined as dating Leni, if not given any real focus so far hopefully that’ll change, while Luaan, in this episodes pairing brother, and most importantly Luna got followups on theres. And thus that brings us here to racing hearts,where nick earns the praise they got from l is for love by following up on it and showing in no uncertain terms the two as a blossoming couple.  I get to the actual episode under the cut:

We start with Lori being upset the bathroom is being taken up.... and that brings up a small issue I have: .. WHY IS THERE ONLY ONE BATHROOM FOR 10 KIDS. I do assume Lynn Sr and Rita have their own, and that it might be hard to put another one up there for plumbing reasons, but it still seems WEIRD to not have more than one up there or close to the stairs so that it dosen’t take 50 years for 10 children to get ready. And yes I said 10, Lily has a diaper and isn’t potty trained yet and any cleaning up or getting dressed, when needed, falls on Rita or Lynn Sr. But still it’s a LOT to ask for 10 children to share share one bathroom peacefully and it’s only through the power of not wanting to spend an animation budget on it that the bathroom isn’t a constant disaster area.  Anyways it’s actually Luna who, to her sister’s shock, is in a facemask getting ready to go to the Royal Woods Astonishing Quest with Sam for their first date. Naturally the other two are excited, and Luna, despite her usual nerves, is actually incredibly stoked and feels it’ll go perfectly. 

At any rate, she’s happy and Lynn comes in to kick everyone out to scrape off her callosuses instead of you know... having Lucy leave their room or doing it while she’s not there, butttt that little detail is actually a tell for later so fair play to you. Plus Lucy may just understandably find int gross and Lynn dosen’t trike me as good at picking up after herself. As it turns out to no one’s shock, Lynn was banned last year for being a sore winner and rightfully so as we see in flashback, but she’scome to terms with it... wink. But they agree to leave as the louds need to get over there anyway.  Cut to the ASTONISHING QUEST.. which turns out to be a scavenger hunt with admitely a great name. Seriously someone use that. But we see tons of returning charcters including Scootst, Pop Pop and his girlfriend, and... 

...........

I”d apologize for thatbut I feel that way any time I see the little weirners face. Be glad this dosen’t happen every time he shows up.  On the bright side he looks as dead inside as I do whenever I find out he’s in an episode, and Zack looks the same amount of dead inside.. probably because he realized a filing cabnet would’ve been a better partner. A review of your choice for the first person to get that reference and send it to me.  Thankfully my extesntial dread at seeing a Rusty cameo is lifted when Luna meets up with Sam and the two are awkard dorks together for a second as they figure out what greeting to do, settling on a handshake. It’s fucking precious. We then meet Royal Wood’s Mayor, voiced by Shirley! Now if she’d just show up on Ducktales already. Though hearing her reminds me I should do some Harvey Beaks reviews at some point... anyways, she announces the quest and Clyde and LIncoln make a fist bump while Lori and Leni stare down their parents like their about to start brawling in the streets then and there. What.. what have you guys done to each other over the years at these things? I want to know the history there. Have astonishing quest show up again in another season. I”d also love an Brooklyn Nine Nine style heist episode with this show .  Anyways, the rules are laid out: Each team is given an evelope with a clue, standard scavenger hunt contest stuff, and have challenges at each location to complete. The first team to finish wins the key to the city.. er a tiny trophy with you did it on it. Honestly that last one’s better anyway. Anyways after from trashtalk from Scoots and her partner Helen, who seems oddly familliar, we’re off! The first clue is easily figured out by Luna and the two old ladies quickly take advantage of Luna saying it loud where everyone can hear it by heading off: It’s off to Lazer Maze , the local Lazer Tag.  The guy there gives them their challenge: They need to get 500 points to get the next clue. Luna takes to it like a fish to water and easily tags Lisa and her friend Darcy... another nice little cameo. And it also shows something I like: not only are all the louds except Lynn, whose banned, and Lily, whose a baby, are competting on their own. And only Lori, who pops back up in a bit and Leni,whose partnered with her are plot relevant, but the episode easily could’ve left them out or used extras for the other teams but wisely decied to instead use characters we’re familiar with. It adds a nice touch that makes this feel like an actual event and make sme wish the show did more townwide events like this. Stars hollow it up. You have a fun character in the mayor, who was hilarious in her one minute here, you have your taylor. Just give her a quirky sidekick and have fun with it. Granted I want every series to have a little gilmore girls in it, but still.  Anyways Sam botches it and instead of shooting the golden girls shoots Luna by accient, though by the next cut they have their points, and the lazer tag guy encourages them anyway. Sam apologizes not being good at Laser tag but Luna happily shrugs it off: While she enjoys it it’s not for everyone. Anyways it’s Luna’s turn to be confused while Sam easily figures out the clue: IT’s off to the farm. And if you wanted the exact oppsite of my reaction to a Rusty cameo...

Yeah while my reactions to Rusty is “Why haven’t you died on the way to your home planet yet?” My reaction to Liam is pure joy. He’s like this generation’s stinky peterson and I love it and has a nice enjoyable personality instead of being my own personal Kahn.  Anyways LIam’s challenge is to get Eggs from the chickens. Which Sam does easily.. Luna however is nervous to start despite Sam’s reasssurances.. before totally freaking out. To be fair though, chickens can be downright terrifying. Just look at Poyo

. 

And why yes that is a chicken hell lordd whose also a cyborg  bisecting santac lause. And why no, you are’nt getting any more context than that, go read Chew.  Anyways theys till have enough eggs to complete the challenge, if now splattered in egg and with Liam disapointed with their shenanigans, but being a professinal about it. Total pro. Anyways, Sam is just as ready to brush it off as Luna, noting farms just aren’t for everyone. I also like this plot in general because while it has the series habit of “thing happens again and again and again then climax” it’s used to flesh sam out a bit. While she is there to be Luna’s love intrest, being a love intrest dosen’t mean a character can’t be good or fleshed out. Just look at tom from star vs the forces of evil for a good example of that.  Anyways it’s once again Luna’s turn to figure out the clue and we’re off to Werk It Dance studio.. I gurantee it was going to say twerk it but nick was like “oh honey no. “. The name is just awkward otherwise. Or maybe i’m just old. Also the twins are there. Just a nice thing to note and two characters I THINK are from an episode I haven’t watched yet but read about. Anyways, Luna’s pumped while sam has “oh crapbaskets” written all over her face and quickly does terribly. This one however is .. not as easy to brush of. Not liking going to farms or laser tag is easy, there just things not to do on dates. Not dancing.. is hard when your both musically inclined people whose taste in music is why you met in the first place. While they try to gloss over it, it’s clear this is an issue and worries them both.  Moving on you know the drill at this point: Sam gets the clue, Luna dosen’t, we’re off to rock climbing. Sam utterly loves it while Luna is terrified. Moving on We cut to Luna, whose sitting down feeling depressed, aka my natural state these days, when Lori and Leni show up. Lori even gave her a cute backpack for the quest.. that has a leash attached. I’d say it’s a bit extreme but i’m half convinced this happened at some point and is the reason Leni dosen’t wear laces. 

Luna is of course spiraling because it turns out she and Sam don’t have a lot in common. Lori however gives some really good advice: Turns out she and Bobby hit some of the same problems and she just suggest they both try embracing things the other person likes. Even if it dosen’t work, shocker given the episode is far from over yet, it’s not bad advice and I like that in relationsihp based episodes it’s Lori who tends to be the one helping out, having the most experince to deal with that and a, at least by this point early Lori could be a bit TOO asholish sometimes, really solid couple.  And if you read this before I apologize because for some reason Tumblr decided to EAT A THIRD OF MY REVIEW FORCING ME TO REWRITE IT. And yes i’m ranting a bit but in my defense I worked hard on this and to have most of it chewed up through no fault of my own pisses me off and thus I needed to rant a bit. Back to the review! So Luna tries Lori’s approach while Lori runs off to find Leni who got off the leash.. again. SHe’s probably just going to sniff some ground, eat the plants,she’ll be finnne Lori. Anyways Luna and Sam go to the local health smoothie shop, the kind of place that is my nightmare for people like me with Orangutan bods but makes sense Sam would be into, and the next challenge is identify what this smoothie is made of. I”ve played this game before: my guesses were fish bones,chicken bones, and dry bones.... seriously the glass was just purred bones. I never bought a smoothie from that guy again.. mostly because someone called the cops. There’s a lesson in that. Luna however spits hers out.  IN a break from formula the next activity is for Luna to come sail away, come sail away come sail away with Sam.. whose actually a pretty apt sailor. You can guess the rest. Luna botches it, they still get the clue, yadda yadda time for the sad part. The two have an honest discussion abotu the fact that despite chemstry being there, they seemingly have nothing but their music in common and are diffrent people, with Luna glumly resolving to finish the race as friends and neither being happy. WHelp my heart just broke, next episode.  So Mayor SHirley from Community greets the girls at the final challenge: A bake off... because apparently just being the first one there wasn’t good enough... then again i’ve seen far worse rule changes by a far smugger canadian man so i’ll let it slide. Thankfully the universe throws the two a bone: Neither can bake. What follows is a damn adorable scene: The two touch hands and blush over butter, before working in synch.. and Sam then procedes to cause their pie to explode in her face.. I could’ve phrased that better, but Luna giggles at it, Sam playfully tackles her giggling insues and the two end up on the ground, smiling at each other. Also Helen and Scoots win. Who cares. Luna realizes from this that she was an idiot to suggest giving up so soon, and proposes they simply try to find things they like together rather than focusing on their diffrences. Because as a coked out cat who sang a duet with a coked out Paula Abdul once said:  If things go wrong we make corrections, to keep things goin in the right directions, try to fight it but i’m telling you jack, it’s uselss opposites attract! By the way the show really dropped the ball not having Luna mention this song titles in one of her song refrence things she does this episode. Anyways the two decide to start dating and then hug. My heart.. it’s too full.  We end the episode on the reveal Helen is Lynn, a nice payoff for earlier as Lynn rides off on her elderly partner in crimes scooter into the sunset while Luna and Sam giggle and look on. Like any great love story. And we’re out.  Final Thoughts:  Okay second time around with this, and it’s a great ep. The repetition hurts it SLIGHTLY, but Sam and Luna’s chemistry helps the episode as does it’s terrific aseop: You don’t have to be exactly alike to love a person, or like the same things.. as long as you connect, and TRY to find things you both enjoy, you’ll be fine. The episodes also helped by plenty of nice little cameos, showing off the series new grasp on continuity, and Lori being Luna’s advisor and Lynn naturally being the douchey rival to them and everyone else. Overall a solid ep that was a natural step forward and set up a good status quo for Sam and Luna. The next ep dosen’t feel as natural a story step, but is still a nice one and the one that insipired me to take the leap and review these eps so join me next time as our faviorite couple bond with some cats and get into some scooby doo door shenanigans with “The Purrrfect Gig” Until then later days. 

[machudson]

some fucing. thign i found and im bored

a – age: 14... lol.. im so tiny b – biggest fear: mmmmgmgmmm i dont know Actually c – current time: 10:06 d – drink you last had/are having: mm water? mayb sparkling apple cider at a christmas party last night  e – easiest person to talk to: ???? sammy & iya g – ghosts, are they real: i have no clue. some stories sound p legit but theres really no way to know h – heritage: very distantly spaniards, but thats like 400 yrs ago. im just white i – in love with: http://cafe-cardamari.tumblr.com/toxink j – jealous of: ppl with motivation to Do things k – killed someone?: what do you think. No l – last time you cried?: i dont remember. probably over fictional characters in the last 5 days l ol m – middle name: none of your business n – number of siblings: one shitty older sister  o – one wish: adhd meds p – person who you last called: i dont use phones. probably grandparents q – question you’re always asked: idk. something about art r – reason to smile: tetrox gorgonzola the love of my life (+ the rest of tammys squids lol) (+talking to sammy and/or iya about said squids) s – song last sang: i dont sing t – time you woke up: uuuh. either 3 am for god knows why or 6 am. im early bird dot fuck u – underwear colour: WHAT?????? v – dream vacation destination: italy i guess w – worst habit: cant focus. ever x – x-rays you’ve had: uh. teeth? y – your favourite food: steak, lamb, naan bread w/ prosciutto  z – zodiac sign: libra

hhhgngghghghgghhg i dont know how many ppl im supposed to tag but @iyasplash

[babayagay]

ok i really wanna know how i work

i cant watch a tv show that i actually enjoy If im in the wrong mood

but heres things I’ve done instead

-spent four hours on a Gravity Falls AU masterpost (its tagged on my blog somwhere if you want it. i definetly put enough work into it)

-Looked up every known and proven Folk Memory of the Maori People

-I’ve been doing this one for weeks now i have a google doc of every single hogwarts student that went to school from the 1940s to the 1990s. you’d think that would be easy but no. i had to look up every single pixilated sim that was included on some THIRD YEAR video game from the early 2000s. ive also looked at discard forums from the late 90s for early character clues that jk never wrote in

i have them sorted into their individual houses. and the ones that arent specified i have on seperate lists ‘available for redistribution if a dorm is over capacity’. each year and house cant have more than eight students this is a very serious thing im doing

i have been so fucking detailed with this. i just had to know eveyrthing i could about this and keep doing it. its so well thoguth out and i have most of the students down. and then i have last names that aren’t technically canon but i have to invent first names??? Im spending so much time on this and why???

i did the same thing creating family trees for the Black Family 

but how can i do this? spend so much time on something that is pretty much useless. AND I KEEP DOING THIS WITH NEW THIGNS AS I PICK UP NEW INTERESTS