#i have my reasons but its a secret n im not sure tea really is so important but fuck it i love tea

[animeshotsh]

In love with Control (Lucifer x OverlordMakima!Reader)

Summary: Lucifer its in love! Or is he?... Charlie cant help but be upset of this.

Warnings: HH violence - Manipulation - Cannibal mention - Insults - Cursing - Kind of soft tho - Grammmar mistakes -

PT2 of this

Charlie knows she should be upset that her dad just decided to spent more time in the Hotel because of a centrain Control Demon. Who could not care less about the kings crush over them, it was a good spawn to use whatsoever, so (Y/N) made sure to keep the fake facada towards him.

Of course they noticed that the princess of hell was not so happy about her fathers actions, while (Y/N) found it fun to watch, it was also a lose that needed to be repair.

"Princess" (Y/N) bowed towards Charlie who in reaponse tried to tell (Y/N) how that was not necesary, not used to the formality Charlie blushed as (Y/N) next words left their mouth.

"I apologies if this causes you discorfm, however you are the heir of hell and such i must act according to it"

"T-there is no need (Y/N)!! Really, we are all friends in here after all" Charlie responded taking (Y/N)'s hands "Im really happy you are giving this a try"

(Y/N) smiled at the princess, they could not understand how this was the pawn of Lucifer itself.

"Princess, I would like to apologie if the resent interactions between the king of hell and myself has made you uncomfortable. If you want I can call our meetings off"

Meeting were Lucifer showing up randomly, putting much effort in impressing the Control Demon.

Charlie was suprised. She had to admit that it did hurt her to see her father being now interested only because (Y/N) was present. But, did her father not deserve happynes too? Who was she to denied such a thing.

And you were so considerated. Oh! Charlie could tell you were going to be one of the firsts demons to be saved.

"I aprecciate your concer, but there is no need. Im happy to see my dad out of his office more and...and seeing him making a new friend. There is no reason for both of you to stop seeing each other"

The smallest of a smirk appear on your face.

"Thanks Princess you are very kind"

~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆

After the first time Lucifer saw you, he was hunted in the good sense by your eyes. These spiral eyes, it made him feel emotions he thought did not exist anymore.

Yet, anytime you two would meet up for tea or just for a walk, you would keep eye contact making the king of hell feel his soul being pulled out from his chest. His ideas and words would cramble as you would still talk about whatever topic you two were on.

"Your majesty, are you alright?" You asked pulling down the cup of tea. Lucifer was once again lost in your words and image.

"Eh?-oh yes! Sorry, ammm work has been in my mind lately" He lied taking a nervous sip, ignoring how hot the tea was.

"Oh? If its too much i can help" Pulling your hands under your chin you saw as how he gluped down some saliva, he was not expecting an offer like that.

What better chance to discover the secrets of hell if not by being besides the one who made it himself? This was a unique chance you were going to try and reach.

Lucifer had two ideas, one from where exactly he would find much work that needed you to be by his side- helping him of course, and two that it was an amazing oportunity to pass more time with you.

"Ummm, well I- I have it covered....from now"

Lucifer saw your reaction, your eyes being cast down and your shoulder defeating. He felt like he had just broken something.

However, that reaction was once again a calculated one. After spending so much time with Lucifer you got to see and understand what made the small king feel guilty and would make him fall down into your trap.

"B-but there are some really old books that needs to be clean and organized"

He cringed at his stupid "extra work" and waited to see your reaction or hear your words.

"Oh....so you are having a hard time with daily tasks" you said taking one hand to your face and thinking "I guess, its normal that even your majesty would face that type of thing. If you allow it would be an honor to help you sort these books"

One part of Lucifer was jumping while the other was completly frozen. You, someone whos name was whisper in fear in the circle, someone with so much power and intelligence, would do such a thing as organize books?

"I loved them when i was alive. Never was a big fan of Tvs or any electronic device, the touch of the paper and the different covers" You closed your eyes, adding drama to the moment, missing how Lucifer eyes almost turned in hearts.

"Well, its settled then. I can- i can call you so you can come over?..." Lucifer asked feeling like a young teen asking out his crush.

"At anytime your majesty"

"Please, Lucifer its fine" You were going to kill him if you continued to adress him as that.

~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆

Later that night at the Hotel the dark corridors where filled with silence as you walked to your room a neutral expression on your face.

"Well, i must say I havent quiet find someone who's tongue is as sharp as a blade" The static voice and laughts from a deer demon said making you stop to turn and look at him with a smile.

"Alastor, its a pleassure to see you tonight. Do you need something?"

"I must say, seeing the king of hell fall down over a sinner who only tells lies has its own charm Dear. Its a shame not everybody falls under your spell"

"Im not sure what you are talking about but..."

Grey chains appear behind you swiftly going for Alastor's head and pircing it.

"I still see you as nothing but a lowlife cannibal, who seeks nothing but entretaiment in others fails, when you are the very example of one. Being caught and shoot to death when being alive, and then having your soul being held by someone. To me all you are is a kid, crying for his mother, wishing to be in a different situation but finding yourself again at the bottom. And I know this because this is not the first time you try to corner me, but we both know how this ends....or well I do"

"Alastor, you wont remember seeing me here tonight. Whatever you overhear when I talked to Lucifer you wont remember it. You will go to your room, lock the door and sleep till tomorrow morning when Charlie ends needing you"

Alastor eyes devoid of emotions or any type of sign of being there. He just nodded his creepy smile not leaving. Slowly he turned back and went all the way to his room.

"Oh many times is he going to try get in my way" You murmured to yourself as you continued walking. "Well, i can always order him to kill the Hotel staff, im sure that would piss the princess really bad" You finally said with a sadistic smile as your eyes brighted in the dark.

[goingferalapparently]

finally watching jaiden's latest stream. have some things that happened that i found interesting/funny

q!foolish inviting her to another capybara summoning circle the next day, q!jaiden never actually answering the question of the matter of attendance

q!fit asking her to do a cucurucho impression

q!jaiden being silly by the monitors "me when cucurucho is on the server-" pause. cucurucho in the background

telling q!foolish "i thought i saw something, but i must've seen wrong" even though like 5 seconds before she just goes "[cucurucho] must not want to talk", absolutely knowing she saw cucurucho

q!foolish: "we'll see what happens tomorrow" q!jaiden: "yeah i'll see you around" (implied tomorrow)

q!jaiden tossing the grappling hook at q!baghera and failing like q!cellbit throwing wood at q!jaiden during the "can you hear it?" mission (and also failing)

q!baghera: "i like ugly and moldy. ............reminds me of my grandpa"

q!jaiden: "everyone should have a window into the sun rise and set"

q!jaiden holding the red sharestone and looking around her house hesitantly before deciding "too deep now" and letting q!bag come anyway. deep breathing and general nervous energy. calming herself down with "its okay"s

i want to check this w q!j showing q!cell n q!fool the place but, q!bag asking ab the biome and q!j playing it down as "just a nice place that i like"

general tone of voice when showing q!bag the place

looking up at the sky and realising its sunset but also realising that she cant see the sun and cant leave to see the sunset proper bc she's w q!bag and so moving the clock to her hotbar

q!bag asking to see the "second house" and the vtubers expression as she follows behind q!bag....

q!bag having to ask ab specific places before q!j shows them to her (as opposed to q!cell bring shown to even the secret farm)

q!j saying she was unprepared to have people over (but also that q!bag saw the bobby room and “didn’t say any weird stuff so…”)

“i’m sure its okay that baghera knows…”

cucurucho’s tea garden….

“baghera, cellbit and foolish all know, but i might change the warpstone [to bobby fields]”????????

q!j taking photos of cucurucho AT bobby fields

cucurucho blowing bubbles at the tea plants!!!

cucurucho doing a lil spinny thing on the way up the treehouse ladder!!!

cucurucho: “do you want to go on a walk?” q!j: “a- one second” (mutes self) “!!!!!! HE WANTS TO GO ON A WALK!!! OKAY Calm down calm down-“ (unmutes self, most even tone ever) “Okay, we can go on a walk”

cucurucho shooting the mobs for q!j (deja vu hours)

q!j running back to the house after being absolutely jumped by mobs and chiding herself for blowing the opportunity with cucurucho

q!j taking…. many photos of cucurucho at bobby fields

q!j noticing cucurucho’s strange behaviour and calling him out for being “strangely warm” and asking “are you okay?” (as opposed to “what’s wrong (with you)?”)

q!j believing in and feeling vindicated by proof of cucurucho’s good side

q!j listening to q!cell talk ab being tricked by the feds and then going (to chat) "cucurucho? whos that? definitely not someone im building a really close relationship with" and various other sarcastic? awkward? versions of things that sum up the general islander mentality towards cucurucho

q!cell: "they've giving motives for everyone to hate them" etc. while the vtuber model just shows awkward glances all over the place

q!cell: "eventually everyone on the island will hate [the federation]" and then the change in pov so the camera is pointing at q!j

q!cell offering q!j an office in the ordo and the "if im welcome, id love to be" (emphasis on the if im welcome)

slime noises

q!j: "we can talk this out some other time" and then KNOWING what happens at the end of the stream

q!cell's offered office being one with keycards and chance to decorate and this feels so federation-core for some reason

q!j pole dancing in front of "o diabo"

(about putting her sign in one of q!cell's entity rooms) "i could put it [in the corner] but do i really want to be hidden in a world of chaos?"

hey is it just me or is she taking a lot of pictures lately?

q!cell: "if you need me just call me" AAAAAAAAAAAAA

pals i am a sucker for "i'll be there when you call"/"i'll be there for you even if you dont know it" kind of friendships

"ALRIGHT!! We are NOT spilling any beans today!"

cucurucho appearing and giving the "too eccentric" book and fucking BOOKING IT

(to cucurucho) "you're being weird today"

"im not good with riddles, cucurucho, you know that. i take things too literally"

"cant believe a sheep just exploded"

"cucurucho do you want something from me or not, i'm confused"

"cucurucho, what's up with you today? you're being like, really weird. i thought it was good-weird at first but now its just weird-weird"

frowning, whispering to self "oh this is weird, this is weird, this is weird"

deep hissing breath in through the mouth "something is not right"

reiterating "cucurucho, something's not right. something's up. you're being weird."

"cucurucho, i need help. you know im not cellbit. im just lil old me. i dont know."

q!jaiden being ENTIRELY unsurprised and immediately jumping to the books being about the two cucuruchos when given the "have you seen him? have you seen me" book AND THEN LISTING THE DIFFERENCES

(to cucurucho) "its like we're partners in crime"

(when following cucurucho from spawn) "philza's up there" (implied that he may notice her presence)

all the joking about the "Getting Chair-ed" aside, i dont think she was meant to be stuck in there, i think she was genuinely meant to be teleported, there was just a lil mess up w permissions for the teleporter plate

anyway. you thought heading 14k blocks out for the freezer dungeon was bad? try x: -15725 z: -9005 (from x: 3053, z: 1906, thats roughly 21.7k blocks out)

the way she glances between the teleporter plate and cucurucho + the serious (wary) expression, general scanning the area and zooming in on any potential exits (while waiting for cucurucho to respond after the "be patient" book)

"this one's got a window!" NOOOOO

i had sub-thoughts about some of these but. uh. tumblr doesnt have?? like. the sub-point in the point form. so.

[globrights]

after the dust settles and the married couple are gone for good (neither of them can remember their last names, or even bothered asking), dennis finds himself boiling a cup of tea. normally, this would be a beer, or, hell, several gallons of hard liquor situation, to help drown it all out. to forget. to push deep down where their own ears are deaf to the burrowing guilt. they still feel guilt, right?

tried to break up a couple. who they thought were falling apart because the husband cheated on a guy named teddy, but it turns out teddy was the name of their dead leukemia son and greg isn’t even gay.

or well. he could be gay. we don’t know that. 

his mind diverts to the gurgling of their old kettle, screaming from its spout, old and crying for reprieve. he thinks of the sounds of lisa crying, echoing down the halls, this experience piling onto her grief and pain no doubt. he isn’t sure he felt all that bad. awkward, sure. but if he really felt so bad he wouldn’t be drinking tea. mac didn’t seem all that affected either though, so he thinks he’s in the clear. people die everyday, right? people’s kids die too. it only really hurts if it happens to you.

“hey, you want tea?” dennis settles down at their table, mac is seated on one of their yellow chairs. the question is pretty much rhetoric, he thinks. mac is only here because he wants some of whatever dennis was making. or he’s here to be with dennis, so he might as well have some tea while he’s at it. dennis pours carefully into their cups. the steam is kinda stinging on his knuckles. maybe he should’ve tricked mac into doing this.

“i was thinking about you.”

“huh?” dennis sets down the kettle. he has no idea what mac is talking about.

“when i was. talking to greg. tryna get him to date me, fuck me, fall- i don’t know,” he sighs, almost despondent now.

“what’s...” dennis stops. his throat catches because he now has a little inkling of what. “uh.”

“i don’t know, man, i don’t know. i watched all those rom-com movies-”

“yeah, i know.” he knows because they watched them all together. every chummy, over-the-top, cliched as hell rom-com. they saw so many of them, because mac said he never saw them before because he thought men couldn’t watch those movies because that would be gay. but he’s gay now, so. no reason not to. and dennis sat and watched with him, made recommendations, too. didn’t think about the implications of all that. he sure as hell is thinking now. “those movies- that’s what gave you the idea for the scheme.” 

“i guess. i keep thinking, dude. like, when i watch those movies, i think about you.���

dennis is almost angry. they had an equilibrium here. they had an understanding again, he thought. they’d be normal, they’d be friends, dennis doesn’t point it out when mac is staring at him a second too long, mac stops trying to explain why he stares. mac stops trying to redefine who they are, what they mean to each other. 

“mac-”

“every time i talked about, about leading men, leading ladies, making the perfect rom-com in real life, talking about love, that was all you, man. i said it, cuz, i was thinking about you.” 

“don’t say it-” dennis begs, eyes downcast. “please don’t say it.”

“why not, dennis?” he is exasperated. “because, i mean, i tried. i wanted to let go, believe me-” he points-”but you know how you were like. you didn’t give a shit about lisa. i couldn’t pay you to fuck her-”

“that’s because you have no money-”

mac almost laughs at that, and it’s a good thing he does, because it quells his anger and he sits back down, slumped and drained, but he sits back down. “i don’t think you even like women anymore. so why can’t you like me?”

“that’s ‘cause you’re annoying,” he thinks, he thinks maybe, if he keeps deflecting, keeps throwing quips and catching cheap laughs from mac, maybe he will drop this. oh, please. please let him drop this. 

“you don’t really think that. not for the most part.”

“oh, but i do.”

“fine, then i’ll leave right now,” mac stands up again, tries to find some thing to throw into something, like shirts into a bag, but he comes up empty. he raises his voice to compensate. “i’ll move out, just like you wanted! you want me to leave dennis? you wanna sit here in this apartment alone, lying to your goddamn self?”

“mac, sit down.”

“say you want me to stay.”

“no.”

“then i’m leaving,” he tries to move to his room now. oh god, he hates this. his tea is getting cold. mac’s tea, which he’ll have to drink if the idiot makes a break for it, is getting cold too.

“mac, come back, please. we can do this another time.” mac ignores him, actually starts packing a bag, so dennis has to drag himself off that chair, and walks his heavy steps toward mac, grabbing his hand, the one that’s tearing open a duffle bag. “come on,” he says, trying to sound patient. “what’s this really about?”

for a moment there, mac looks at him like he has the comprehension of a very stupid baby. “i wanna be in love, man.” 

“i know, okay, i’m sorry the air bnb thing failed, we can try it some other time, market the place to some, some hot greasy beefcakes. not greg, okay? guy was ugly as shit anyway.” 

“this, this isn’t about the air bnb, i don’t care about the air bnb!” 

“i know, i know, you wanna be in love!” dennis yells back, tired of this. “we’ll find you someone-”

“i don’t want just any bozo off the street, dennis, i want-”

“then we won’t get some bozo off the street, i said-”

“i want you!” mac exhales so loud after that. “oh my god, will you please shut up, dude. don’t act like you don’t know.” “i know, okay? believe me, i know. i’m saying this because i know. and trust me, you don’t know.”

“okay now you’re confusing the fuck outta me. uh, what don’t i know?”

“you don’t want me. you want the closest thing that’s most comfortable. trust me, buddy. i know i’ve been pissed about this in the past, but i get it now. i know it isn’t your... well, i guess, fault.”

“so you don’t believe me.”

“no, i just-”

“dennis, i love you man.” the words leave mac’s lips but they stick in dennis’ throat. “i wanna be in love, because i’m-i love you. i don’t even, i don’t even think i care if that scares you off anymore.”

“if it scares me off will you stop?”

“no.”

“why the hell not?”

“because i-”

“yeah, yeah, you’re in love with me,” he groans. “fine. be in love with me. i don’t care.”

but he does.

mac scoffs. “be in love with you? all on my own? by myself dude? fuck off. i’m so tired. i’m so fucking tired i can’t do it anymore. i can’t do this. i drive myself crazy because of you. i think you hate me, i think you love me, i think, i think i’m gonna die.”

“stop being so melodramatic.” 

“well, i’m sorry, dennis. i’m sorry you don’t give a shit about this, or me, but, it hurts, okay? and-”

“who says i don’t give a shit about you?”

“then why won’t you say anything?”

“oh give me a break. you haven’t been talking to a wall or anything. i’m right fucking here.”

“you’re talking, sure, but you’re not saying shit, bro. you’re not telling me a thing.”

dennis sits down on mac’s unmade bed. he must be getting a migraine. “what, pray tell, do you want to hear from me?”

“the truth. if you don’t love me, fine, if you’re not into men, fine. tell me, dude. do something. say something. but don’t fucking lie to me. i’ll know that, at least.”

“if-” dennis hesitates. “if you can tell.” he is tempted to just run away, frankly. “does it need to be said?”

silence drapes over them, the room, a cold silence, it freezes everything around it, and now dennis is the one who wants to die. he’s said too much by not saying enough. maybe it’s not to late to say sike and proclaim his undying hatred for mac. lord knows it’s got some truth to it. mac is insufferable, he is annoying and controlling and a full on bitch. but god, dennis can’t stay away, dennis can’t even look away sometimes, and maybe that is his one flaw. 

“say stop.” 

mac shuts his eyes, leaning in. dennis doesn’t pull away. his eyes flutter then droop close, too. mac plants the softest, most chaste kiss on his lips. when he pulls away without taking things any further, dennis looks at him, not a thought in his mind. mac breathes out. “i never thought i’d get to do that.”

“so do you feel better now?” his voice is almost petty. dennis has one too many thoughts now. all of them involve mac realizing he has no interest in dennis at all and that this was all just. one big ruse. mac has what he wants, so he wants nothing more now. maybe dennis can save his dignity if he claims that letting himself get kissed was a fluke too. “can we- can we go and have that tea?”

“not if i get to keep kissing you.” dennis looks almost shocked. mac looks to the side. “can i? keep kissing you?”

dennis moves first this time. he traps mac’s lips with his own, face between his hands, pulling mac close. mac takes the hint, draws in, knee between his legs, and he moans at the contact. he inches up mac’s shirt, and mac stops kissing him to sit up, pull it off. he’s straddling dennis when he leans back in and says ‘i love you’, again, inches from his lips. this gets him going. “i love you so much,” he says, words slurred, but meaning profound. “gonna show you how much”. dennis ignores him, but those words, once nothingness, become everything now. he slowly finds himself believing.

“you’re my everything,” he says, recklessly, before the thought leaves his head and before he can reconsider and decide against. mac freezes, and then he smiles. dennis hopes mac knows this means he remembers what he said to greg too. maybe if mac is smart enough, he’ll know dennis wished mac had been talking about him back there, when he heard him dole out a dollop of sweet nothings, to that undeserving greg.

“you’re my everything too, man,” he says, making him giddy in the head, unbuttoning his jeans like it’s a contest, tugging them down with a relish. “oh my god. you’re so much bigger than greg.”

dennis goes pink. “shut up, you’ve seen my cock before.”

“i know. thought it would make you happy. and for serious, dude? it’s. shit.”

“it’s shit?”

“no, like, holy shit, it’s nice, you know?” 

dennis is almost irritated now. he’s got a throbbing hard cock and no one to suck it, you know? or pump it. or put their... ass over it? dennis isn’t really sure what mac’s gonna do here. 

just as he’s about to chastise him, mac licks down the flat of his palm and sends his hand down the side of his shaft, touching it tentatively, out of curiosity. dennis makes a very embarrassing noise, but is soon rendered unconscious of it, because tongue dances around his arousal and mac’s lips pull over it, slowly sucking him off, and dennis is more helpless than he should be, whimpering and pleading, pathetic as can be, but it doesn’t matter, it’s okay, and mac goes faster and faster and it gets wet and so, so good, and he’s crying for help, for more, for release. he grabs onto whatever he can, at some point, he grabs at mac’s leg and gets swatted at, and then he doesn’t think or remember how it happens but he gets what he’s needed for the longest time. 

“fuck,” he curses, a good minute or so after it happens, because god, he can’t believe that this happened. oh well. too late now. pretty hard to take getting your dick sucked back. 

“was that good?”

“you’re actually asking?”

mac laughs. it feels good to hear. “i was awesome, right, dennis?”

“shut up.”

“okay.” he almost loves this. mac’ll do anything he says now, at least for a good few days. 

“hey.”

mac flips his head immediately to look at him. he’d make fun of mac, except he looks beautiful, and his dick is hanging out, so maybe it’s not the time to make fun of someone with anger issues, whether he’s in love with you or not.

“yeah?”

“i-” he changes his mind. “you wanna get some tea?”

mac looks a little confused, but he nods instantly, readily. “uh, sure. if that’s what you want.” 

dennis searches for his pants and pulls it on and mac finds his top. they walk to the kitchen in silence and mac hands dennis his tea. he takes a sip. they sit down.

“i meant to say i loved you too,” dennis admits after a while, and to his surprise, mac doesn’t drop his tea, or have any outward reaction aside from his smile. 

“i know. you kinda said it earlier when you were-”

“oh.” well that’s embarrassing. 

“can we go have sex now?”

they down their tea so fast it would’ve burned their throats had it been any hotter. frankly, there was no need to finish the tea. but they do it anyway, and they scamper off to whichever room’s the closest to finish what they started. 

they’ve got the rest of their lives to start and finish things now.

[waywardimpalawriter]

Side Tracked (William “Ironhead” Miller x Plus Size Female Reader)

Side tracked 

Pairing: William ’Ironhead’ Miller x Plus Size Female Reader 

Rating: (E) Explicit, (M) Mature, NSFW, 18+ Only please

Warnings: Teasing, Smut, Protected Sex (p in v), if you squint Dom Will kink, unknown pain kink (in the form of cunt slaps),

Word count: 8,053 (I’m sorry but not sorry. Goes to show I can’t write anything short.)

Summary: Vacation is fast approaching but you haven’t told Will just yet. Along with a few other things you haven’t talked about with your new boyfriend. 

Notes: Sequel to “One Touch” written for the amazing @autumnleaves1991-blog​ Writer Wednesday. 

“Have any ideas for your vacation yet?” Taking a sip of her tea, eyes watching you slowly move the spoon around your own mug. Soft chuckles slips passed her smiling lips, “Earth to Y/N you with me sweetheart?” 

“Have any ideas for your vacation yet?” Taking a sip of her tea, eyes watching you slowly move the spoon around your own mug. Soft chuckles slips passed her smiling lips, “Earth to Y/N you with me sweetheart?” 

“Huh…” glancing up from staring into your favorite green Mandolorian mug with Grogu etched into the ceramic. Brain catching the fact that you haven’t truly answered her question.

Head tiled noticing the mug, “Moving in already I see.” Teasing edge to her quip a chuckle leaving right after. Swearing she heard it crack with how fast your head popped up, blank confused look filling your eyes. 

“What… what? No, I hav… we haven’t. I just love this mug is all,” bringing said cup to your lips for a deep drink mindful of the hot liquid inside. Finally catching on to the first question she asked, “And no there’s no plans for next week. Just staying home, clearing, packing up old shit to get rid of.” 

Smirk sliding over her lips she tries to hide knowing why the mug is so special and an added secret she keeps that Will hasn’t told you yet. “Why haven’t you told Will?” 

“Hasn’t come up really, besides I didn’t want to pull him alway from his job.” Nibbling the inside of your cheek thankful Isabella’s with the babysitters this late afternoon rolling the idea around to ask a delicate question. “Besides it’s early still in our relationship I wouldn’t want to impose or suggest…” 

Sensing a trouble deeper than just decisions about your vacation plans, she rests a hand on your forearm giving a gentle squeeze. “What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing,” comes out quicker than you mean it too. Giving away the fact something truly is wrong but having a hard time asking for help. 

Soft sigh leaves her lips, “Sweetheart you know we can talk about anything,” catching your eyes to convey without words the truth. “You’re my best friend so spill woman or I’ll sic Frankie on you.” 

“No please God not Morales he’ll nag like an old woman till I talk,” dramatically stating smile tipping the corners up but not reaching your eyes. Weary sigh follows, gripping the green mug a little tighter to warm your hands with the drink. “We, Will and I haven’t, not that there hasn’t been some heavy make outs but we haven’t…” Stumbling over your words trying to get them out as best you can without reverting to your shy self when it comes to intimate subjects.  

“Fucked that what you’re stumbling over?” Full smirk hidden behind her own plan mug. “Have you talked to him about why?” Shaking your head, eyes downcast biting your bottom lip in apprehension. “Communication is key for a health relationship sweetheart you know that.” 

“But what if he doesn’t want to? Maybe he’s changed his mind and doesn’t know how to tell me,” everything spilling out in a rush. Looking from the mug in your hands that Will bought you just last month to her kind eyes going soft with understanding. “I think I’m falling in love with him and it scares the fucking hell out of me.” 

Laughter full and deep leaves her lips, making you frown ready to pop her shoulder. “I’m sorry sweetie truly but I could’ve told you that just from how you talk about him. I’m not trying to make light of the situation in the least, but the two of you are as transparent as me and Frankie.” Patting your hand she takes giving a firm squeeze. “You should talk to him. Explain what you want and ask why he’s holding back.”

Neither women hear the front door open, keys quietly pressed into the glass dish on the end table behind the couch. Toeing his boots off by the front door, Will shrugs the jacket from his broad shoulders. Hearing your sweet voice tinged with uncertainty has a frown forming between his eyes. 

“I know, I’m just unsure how he’ll feel when I finally tell him. Only three months into our relationship but I’m done waiting,” hands coming up to hide your face in exasperation. “I don’t want to hurt his feelings but fuck I need more.” 

Nodding, eyes catching a shadow hovering around the outer archway into the kitchen. “You won’t know how he’ll take it till you explain yourself Y/N. Trust me when I say it’s not for the reasons you may think.” Trying to keep the smirk from her tone as Will rounds the corner. 

“Something you want to tell me honey?” Making you jump but not turn to face him. Will tries to tramp down his fear at hearing your words. True the relationship is new but he couldn’t see his life with you in it, bringing the sunshine in those dark days. Watching as she gets up from the table placing a kiss to your forehead before coming over to him. 

Hand resting on his chest giving a soft pat, “Tell her about next week Ironhead and stop hiding things from each other for Christ sake or I’ll sic Frankie on you to.” Tapping a little harder for emphasis before tossing over her shoulder, “See you tomorrow at work girlie have fun tonight,” before taking her leave the same way Will came in. 

Staring at your slumped back for a few moments, Will steps towards you right as you stand collecting the mugs to wash. Bumping into each other Will takes the cups from your hands, soft grin splitting his lips upon seeing his present. 

“You know I have mug’s here, you don’t have to keep bringing yours with you,” setting the cups in the sink, he turns to lean against the counter, hands on either side, body open much like his expression. 

Nodding, hands clasp in front of you twisting fingers in nervousness the movements pressing your generous breasts together and capturing his gaze. Clearing your throat, “I know but I happen to like that mug. It’s special,” finally meeting his stormy blue eyes. Seeing there darker and slightly blown, “You hungry?” 

“Yes,” voice gruff with arousal that he tries to clear then speaks again. “Can we talk first?” 

Worried about what could come next swiping your tongue over the full bottom lip capturing it to pull between your teeth making small indentations into the skin, “Bout what?” Cautiously stepping towards him wondering how much of your conversation he’d heard. 

“Us,” reaching out to take your hand, tugging you towards the living room. Sitting down first patting the space beside him which you take intertwining your fingers back with his once comfortable. Needing the contact for the moment to get through the conversation. 

“What about us?” Staring at joined hands, resolutely keeping your eyes away from looking into his. Thoughts chasing each other around your mind like cats after mice. Wondering if you could still back out and run home to hide. Insecurities doing damage to your confidence Will’s helped build over the last three months. 

Not letting you shy away from him, Will pinches your chin upward to capture your eyes. “What are you done waiting for?” Trying to keep his eyes pinned to yours instead of watching your lips or the gentle rise and fall of your breasts covered in a Burgundy blouse with a v deep that shows the twins off to perfection. 

Gathering your thoughts and nerves, going for blunt and ripping the bandaid in one. “Do you want to fuck me?” 

Of all the things Will’s prepared for your blunt answer isn’t one of them and surely not how you put it either. “You’ve been hanging around Fish and the misses too long.”  

Eyes rolling hard a small snort leaving your lips as you try to pull your chin from his grip. “You wanted to know Will so answer the question.” When that didn’t work you tug your hand free to cross with its partner under your breasts. 

“Actions speak better than words sweetheart,” gripping your arms, Will tugs you close. “Come here,” patting his lap your head shaking no garnering an impatience huff from his lips. Ignoring your resolute posture, Will grabs a leg and matching arm to manhandle you over his lap, shocked gasp parting your bitten lips. Till your thick thighs press into the couch on either side of his own. Rough hands drifting over your curves in reverence to settle around your waist. Gripping the softness of your body with enough pressure to keep you still. “Tell me honey what do you feel?” 

Bitting off a whimper to turn into an annoyed huff from your chest, hands going to his shoulders in the bid to keep from straddling his lap and sitting your weight into his body. The resounding growl vibrates through his chest noticing your efforts to keep from settling in his lap. Will uses his superior strength to press your curves against his angles. “Im too heavy for…” last words choked off as a gasp pushes passed first. Eyes fluttering shut at the hard ridge of his cock against your jeans covered folds.   

“Feel me baby? Feel how hard you’ve made me with just those simple movements of this fucking gorgeous body,” words escaping through clinched teeth. Gritting to keep from taking you right there on his couch like some horny teenage. 

Unable to stop your own hips from undulating against his, trying to find the right friction. Making your thighs shake, your head drops to his shoulder as he gathers you into the warmth of his embrace. “Could…” swallowing, burying your nose against the warmth of his musky cologne peppered with hints of pine and cedar scented neck. “You could have a flash light hidden in there or a Tootsie roll stashed in your pocket.” Going for a teasing tone but it comes out breathless, filled with barely repressed passion.

Gruff laughter, deep and warm shakes his chest, “Fuck you’re dangerous woman.” Brushing his lips over the shell of your ear, nipping the delicate skin with sharp teeth pleased at the gasp he draws from your mouth. Making you shutter around him, your hips rock twice more before his large callused hands pause there movements dusting his fingers under the hem of your blouse to touch skin. “Trust me honey when I say that’s no flashlight.” 

Repressing the shiver coiled to roll down you back, you reluctantly pull back to cup his cheek, thumb brushing just under his left eye, “Prove it to me Captain.” 

Low groan leaves his lips, resting your foreheads together. “God I want to honey so fucking much,” swallowing harshly raising his face so you could see the truth in his eyes. “When I make love to you for the first time Y/N I don’t want you to have any doubts about why or if I’m sticking around.”  

“I know you aren’t going anywhere Will,” leaning in to give him a chase kiss. “I just, I need more want more of you. All of you,” returning back to sitting on your knees, arms wrapped around his neck to catch his eye. Fingers card through the short locks blunt nails scrapping the scalp gently receiving a pleasure moan from the man under you. 

Cupping your cheeks, “You have me honey I promise you.” Bringing your mouth in for a deeper kiss. That barely brushed first press only serves to spark a hunger in his veins and a need to taste you. Slotting his lips over yours nipping the bottom one to make you gasp and slide his hot tongue into your warm mouth. Tangling the talented muscle with your own one hand sliding to carefully cradle the back of your neck. The other slipping down into a back pocket of your jeans, pressing you down against his harden cock and rocking you over his body. Slick gathering, dripping and coating your tights with each tangle and brush of his masterful tongue. Pulling another whimper of need from the depths of your soul. 

Air becoming a need and the only reason you break apart panting and gathering as much into your burning lungs. “Your gonna need to stop kissing me like that William or I won’t be held responsible for what I might do.” 

The use of his full name pulled a deep groan of need from his chest. The way you move against him doesn’t help his resolve to wait and make things special. “You’re making things extremely hard right now sweetheart.” 

“Oh it’s hard all right,” soft squeak exists your lips when he squeezes your ass, pushing your drenched core down against his erection a little harder. “I’m blame you for that one Mr. Miller,” eyes close to gather yourself before carefully untangling your bodies. An almost impossible endeavor with the tight grip he has on you. Holding back the giggle when you see a pout on his plush lips that you lean forward and kiss twice, “No pouts, you said we’re waiting and I’m going to hold you to that. So,” standing hands on your wide hips brow arched in challenge as you look down at him. Slowly licking your lips at the tempting sight he presents you. Tight black t-shirt covering a sculpted body of equal parts strength and softness. Arms crossing over that massive chest to glare up at you. “Put that glare away to, it’s your fault there will be no more kisses or hot make out sessions till we make love. I can’t trust myself,” eyes rolling at the smirk sliding over his kiss swollen lips. “Not to tear your clothes off and fuck you right there,” pivoting on the ball of your bare feet to head towards the kitchen. Trying to ignore the throbbing of your clit only amplified by each step away, and the fact you’ve soaked your favorite pair of panties in seconds because of Will Miller. 

“Tear my clothes off huh? Wanna get me naked that badly honey?” Getting a soft giggle in response but no actual words. Calling after you with, “We’re not done talking woman. Get back here,” low growl leaving his lips watching the sway of that generous ass he desperately wants to get his hands on. “Where you going?” 

“Dinner, we can finish our conversation in there,” tossing the words over your shoulder as you keep walking. 

Grumbling, Will stands adjusting himself to relieve at least some pressure from his cock. Wondering if he’ll make it through a bad case of blue balls intact. “Can’t I just…” the flow of words halt seeing you bent over in the refrigerator searching. Ass a ripe peach just begging to be bit into. 

“Just what baby?” Grabbing the salmon fillets, broccoli crowns and the bag of potatoes to stand. Turning to look back over at Will, who’s just standing in the doorway. Trying not to give away how his presents effects you, “You okay?” 

Gulping twice, “Yup prefect,” teeth gritting at the adorably sweet look on your face. Unaware of the affect on his body and heart you have. “Need help?” 

“Please,” bright smile tipping his own lips up to match yours. Head resting on his shoulder for a moment before you raise up on your toes to kiss him chastely. “You can cut the potatoes up while I take care of the broccoli,” setting everything down on the island to grab up two knives and bowels. Setting to work as Will slides up beside you, arms brushing while you both work. “What else did you want to talk about?” 

“Vacation,” small gasp alerts him to your slight distress. “Yes your best friend told me but I’d like to know why my girlfriend didn’t?” 

Silently cutting the broccoli from center stem, searching for words to answer. “I didn’t want to take you from your job,” giving a slight shrug. “Besides I don’t really have the money to go anywhere. I’d still come over every night or we could go out on day trips.” 

“Sweetheart you mean more to me than some job ever will,” pausing for a moment to kiss your temple. Small guilty grin spreads over his lips, “What about a road trip?” Glancing towards you, admiring the beautiful profile filling his vision. Not paying attention to cutting up the potatoes Will accidentally slices a small cut into his forefinger. Hiss sounds from his parted lips yanking his hand back from the cutting broad to check the damage. 

Catching the noise frown pulling your lips down seeing the bright red drops of blood pearling on the side of his finger near the tip. Training kicks in, grabbing for the paper towel to wrap around the wound. “Sit at the table,” voice holding a slight stern note as you rush off to the bathroom for the first aid kit and rubbing alcohol. 

“No need to fuse so honey I’ve had worse in my life than a scratch,” calling after you though your actions warm a part of Will he’s long buried to keep from getting hurt. 

Though he can’t see it you still shake your head, “Small as it maybe handsome infection can still set in and do damage just sit your sexy ass down and I’ll return shortly.” 

Entering right as Will drops down into the chair, you drag another forwards to sit. Opening the large plastic med kit and pulled items you’ve stocked up. Damping a couple small gauze squares and carefully taking the blooded paper towel from his finger. “I’m sorry,” compassionate gaze in your eyes that lock with his while gently dabbing the wound. Hearing a pained hiss exist his tightly held together lips. “My big strong Delta Focus Captain wincing at a little cut,” playfulness dancing in your eyes that stay locked with his bright blues that narrow on your face. 

“I’m injured and you pick on me,” taunting words as he keeps your eyes ensnared. “Where’s that bedside manners I’ve heard so much about?” 

Narrowing your own eyes playfully still wiping the blood away, “I don’t show my bedside manner to just any soldier.” Small snicker escapes finishing the cleaning task. “Though you’re special so I just might.” Dropping your eyes to inspect and make sure he wouldn’t need stitches. “Tis a scratch my brave warrior you’ll survive,” giving him a cheeky smile, proceeding to finish bandaging the small cut lovingly. 

Placing a gentle kiss once covered, glancing up into his eyes another gasp leaving your mouth this one different as heat floods your body. Pupil’s blown to crowd out the beautiful blue irises you love staring into. Scorching with the intensity, making you wonder how your body isn’t ash on the floor. Tongue peeks out to wet your lips dragging the bottom back between your teeth to press into trying to keep from whimpering. 

Watching every movement warring internally with himself, equal parts wanting to wait for the right moment and having come to the time now. Your mischievous banter making his heart skip a beat and expand with the very emotion he’s tried to put into words from the moment he met you. Knowing these simple gestures, the care with which you show him, how delicate you’re being or the soft press of your lips into his skin, shouldn’t ignite the desire in his blood. But here he is hard as stone with thoughts of taking you right in this very kitchen. “Come here honey,” voice deep and filled with passionate need. 

“What about our trip planning?” Swallowing your desire to obey his command, staying for a moment in your chair. “We keep getting side tracked it’ll never get planned.” 

Groaning, he hooks the legs of your chair with his feet to drag the seat closer till each of your legs slide between his. Hands gliding up your plush thighs, leaning forward and into your space, those deliciously callused large hands coming to rest on your hips. “Would you be angry if I said I’ve planned everything already?” 

Shock makes your eyes go wide then narrow slightly, “How long have you known I was taking off?” Trying to suppress the shiver wanting to run down your frame when those nimble fingers seek out the patch of skin just under your shirt. Drawing patterns that make you squirm in your seat and try to get away from giving up the secret that your back is sensitive to touch. Most especially his as desire filled fire dances across your skin heating your blood. 

“First of the month,” licking his lips slowly wanting his plans to be a surprise. But figuring now is a good a time as any, “I planned us leaving this Friday after work, everything packed the night before. Head to Arizona and drive through Navajo Nation’s Monument Valley Park.” Tracing little patterns over your soft sides as he speaks, “Do some camping, I even got us a tent attachment for the truck. Unless camping isn’t something you want to do?” Concerned lacing his tone while berating himself for not asking sooner. 

Love blooms crowding out the doubts from earlier, soft smile tugging at your lips as you lean forward to place them gently to his. Hand coming up to cup the side of his whiskered cheek. Teasing the seam with the tip of your tongue, “I happen to love camping William. Just one request?” Words ghosted over his mouth as you speak, adding two more chase kisses and pulling back to study his warring features. 

“Request away honey I’ll give you anything you ask for.” Fingers stilling on your skin a moment, breath held tightly waiting for your answer. 

Brushing your thumb over his bottom lip, soft gasp leaving when he playfully nips at the tip. “Would we snuggle in our tent?” 

“Of,” clearing his parched throat, wondering if that’s the only question. “Of course sweetheart I gotta keep you warm after all.” 

Shyly glancing from his lips up to those desire blown eyes, “Would you make love to me in our tent?” 

Damn near swallowing his tongue at your question. “If that’s what you want,” hands flattening out over your back under the blouse you wear. His touch making you squirm in his arms. Interest peeked by your movements and how your trying to escape his hands. “Something wrong sweetheart?” Watching in fascination as your eyes grow dark, libs getting heavy with arousal. Thighs pressing together seeking out some way to put friction on your clit. When you don’t answer him, Will drags his palms over your back slowly, garnering a low lusty moan from your lips. “Answer me honey is something wrong?” 

Mesmerized by the slow drag of your tongue across your lips, eyes opening and filled with dark passions. One hand coming down to rest on his thigh making his cock twitch painfully in his jeans. “No sir though if you keep dragging those wonderful hands over my back you’ll have something to take care of.” 

Low growl rumbles from deep within his chest at your emphasis on sir. Will files that away for a later discussion along with the fact that you so readily complied with his order. Another twitch makes a groan slip free, fingers digging into your soft hips to tug you forward and onto his thigh. The force making you collapse into his chest, hands gripping the back of his chair. “You’re making this really hard to keep my promise sweetheart.” 

Swallowing to moisten your dry throat, “Something is hard that’s for sure and it’s poking my leg right now.” Using your position and pressing into his thigh that flexes under you. Hips rocking in slow teasing motions, making a whimper leave your chest, head dropping to rest on his shoulder. “Touch me Will please,” ghosting your lips over his neck to nibble the patch right behind his ear. Feeling the shuttering gasp leave his body at the intimate touch. 

Pleading tone breaks him of the resolve to wait and he wraps his arms around your waist, bouncing his leg under you. Flexing the muscles just perfectly to get a gasp of pleasure to tumble from your parted lips. Breath fanning out over the mark you’ve left on his skin just south of his ear. “Thats my girl so fucking responsive,” remembering your words and movements from a moment ago, Will brushes the pads of his fingers over your back. 

Squirming in his arms a flood of arousal washes through your system making a whimper sound as you try to move away from those wicked fingers. “William,” his name existing on a whine of need as your teeth sink into the skin of his neck between shoulder and thick corded column. 

Grunting at the simple bite, body taunt like a bow string, ready to snap at a moments notice. Never this hard in his life feeling like a teenager again and unable to control himself. For you though he reigns in that need along with the desire to control the situation. A discussion tabled till later when he’s not desperate to sink balls deep into your warmth. 

Soothing voice stating, “Tell me what you need honey, I wanna hear everything and then give you what you want.” Sneaking his hands back under your blouse to touch soft skin. Interested by the fact you jump a whimper following close by more squirming in his arms. Light bulb going off in his mind. “Are you aroused sweetheart? Does my touch have that much of an affect on you?” 

Nodding against his chest where your head now rests on his collarbone, gasping for breath. Slick flooding your clinching channel that aches with each contraction. Clit throbbing with a deep need your sure only Will can fulfill. “You don��t have to sound so smug,” whimpering the words as his fingers brush along your spine till reaching the destination your bra clasp would rest. “It’s front closer,” raising your head, gathering your strength to rock over his thigh. Letting him feel the damp heat of your core, knowing it not long and his jeans will have a soaked patch just as your ruined panties already do.

“I’d say I’m sorry honey but I wouldn’t mean it.” Carefully bunching the blouse upward till he pulls it from your plush body. Tossing it somewhere behind him not caring where it lands just the position of his hands spread out over your back. Breasts filling a pretty purple swirled bra, temping his eyes and making his mouth water at the sight. “So beautiful,” leaning forward to graze slightly chapped plush lips over the tops of your heaving breasts. “Remember when you asked me if I was hungry?” 

Puzzled, desired coated eyes lock with the passion filled blues, slow nod bobbing your head. “Are you seriously stopping so we can cook?” Eyes narrow seeing a smirk pull at his bearded cheeks. On shaky legging you stand pulling your bottom lip back between your teeth to bite while your hands that he watches with peeked interest come to open the front clap on your bra. Keeping the cups in place you turn and only then drop the bra into his lap, “Shame I guess it’s plan B then.” 

Standing quickly, gripping your hips to pulling you back into his arms that wrap around our thick waist giving you a squeeze. “Plan B?” Eyes dropping to see hands covering your breasts. 

“Uh hmm, since your hungry I’ll let you eat while I go pleasure myself,” warm breath fanning out over your skin, mouth trailing kisses along the spine of your shoulder. Beard giving a delicious burn to your skin that sends a shiver through your frame. Normal insecurities long forgotten with the heat of his mouth against your skin. Those little nagging voices silenced by the hard press of his body and ridged shaft into the clef of your ass. The simple reason you’ve managed to stand in front of this man half naked and not run away belonged too Will. Who’s made you see with all the caresses, endless amount of kisses and words reminding you everyday how beautiful he sees you. 

“The fuck you will sweetheart,” sexy growl vibrates against your ear. Nipping the shell, “Move your hands baby I never want you to hide yourself from me. I wanna see all of you,” callused palms flat against your tummy, caressing the soft skin almost reverently. 

Obeying his command, body becoming pliant against his chest as your arms slide away. Replaced by the warmth of his larger hands, gently massaging each globe feeling the nipples harden and poke his callused palm. “If you’re teasing me William Miller I’ll beat your ass,” wanting the words to come out hard and full of authority. Instead issue forth on a moan chased by a whimper when his fingers pluck at your harden nipples. Tugging, drawing circles around the rippled areola hearing your breath hitch your head lolling back to rest on his shoulder. 

Dark chuckle leaves his lips brushing over your exposed neck, “Never sweetheart.” Turning you in his arms, to lock eyes as he lowers his mouth to yours. Capturing your lips in a desperate kiss, a battle of teeth and tongues. Hands groping your ass pulling you into his arms tighter. Your own wrapping around his neck, holding on like a life preserver in stormy seas. Fingers carding through his short hairs to tug being rewarded with a lusty growl. 

Breaking, panting for air, “Still hungry?” 

“I”m starved sweetheart,” walking till your back hits the cool wall. Hands splayed out around you while his body pins  you in place, “It’s not food I want.” 

Swallowing harshly, head tipping back to expose your neck which Will takes advantage up. Lips closing over your thumping pulse point returning the marking favor. As your nails scratch lightly through his dirty blond hair, tugging at the strands to urge him up towards your mouth. “Then what?” 

Rebelling against your urgent tugs, taking your hands from his head. Placing them on his shoulders  his own making a slow trek from wrist to arm, ghosting over the parts of your biceps he knows you hate. To your shoulders, gripping them tightly for a moment, as your eyes lock and you see the intend in those stormy blue orbs. “You,” licking his lips just thinking about giving your honeyed folds a taste. “I’m a starving man sweetheart and I’m gonna make you my last meal,” his words coming out on a growl that shoots straight to your core. Need throbbing your clit and press your thick thighs together trying to find friction, desire filled heat exploding out over your body. 

Whimpering, “Later,” needing him right then to sooth the ache building in your core, spreading out to tingle your tummy, heart beating triple time against your ribs. “I need you Will please. I need you to fill me, fuck me, just…” grasping at words to explain how much you need this man standing still clothed in front of you. 

Raking your nails down his hard chest, to dance across his toned stomach, gripping the t-shirt and yanking it over his head quickly. Tossing the garment somewhere unknown for the moment to press your hands into his skin. Heat embracing your palms, running the flat of them over his tawny skin and lowering your mouth to press kisses to his sternum. Bitting softly to drag a groan from the man surrounding you. 

“Is that what you want sweetheart? You need me that badly?” 

Raising your head determination fighting with desire in your eyes, gathering your courage to speak exactly what you want. “I need you desperately, I want you like no other man before. Your in my blood baby and I want you inside me,” slowly licking your lips you push his stunned body back enough so you can wiggle from between his wall of muscle and the actually wall. Pausing to brush your lips over his ear, “I want you to ruin me William, wreck me so badly I can’t walk tomorrow and feel it for the rest of the week.” Pressing your lips to his cheek before walking towards the bedroom. 

Leaving Will frozen to stare at the wall you previously stood, hands fisting to reign in the desire so potentate he’s surprised the seams of his jeans haven’t split with how hard he’s become. Breath exiting quickly as he leans into the surface for a moment till a soft moan echos from his room. Head whipping up, almost fearing a broke neck, straining his hearing to listen for another sound. This one a whimper of his name rips a growl from his mouth, feet taking up the path you proceeded first. Finding your Capri jeans dropped two feet from the bedroom, purple lace panties dangling from the doorknob. 

Pausing in the doorway filling the entrance with his wide imposing body eyes glazed over at what his vision takes in. There sprawled out over his bed the love of his life. Making that two things he’s filing away to think about later. Back arched, one hand tugging and twisting at your nipples the other toying with your clit. Drawing slow circles over the pulsing pearl, “Will please.” Another whimper existing your vocal cords, thick thighs shaking with need.  

Shucking off his jeans, box briefs tented and barely containing his throbbing cock that he palms a moment to get himself under control. That snaps the second your eyes open to focus on his. Sliding two fingers into your quivering cunt to pump slowly. Deep grunt exists, feet eating up the distance to the bed, palm slapping down over your quivering clit making you gasp and close your thighs against the sensations rocketing through your body. 

“No,” single word growled out, arousal flowing freely as Will gets on the bed. Parting your thick shaking thighs to wedge himself between. Fingers yanked from your dripping center and brought to his mouth to taste. Long low moan vibrating through his chest at the honeyed flavor of your essence. Sucking both fingers clean before placing that hand on his ridged cock. Chin dropping to chest when you cup the girth of him through the fabric, fingers dancing slowing over the pulsing veins. All thought of being gentle escapes his mind when you moan. “Top draw sweetheart grab a condom for me while I have my second taste.” When you don’t move to comply right away, Will lands another smack to your cunt garnering a moan of need from your chest. Hips cantering upward in a desperate bid for friction or to be filled. “My girl likes that huh?” Seeing the nod he groans, thumb brushing over your clit twice getting a mewl from you this time. “Words honey, use them and tell me if you like when I slap your pretty cunt.” 

“Yes sir,” gasping at the feeling of his moist breath fanning over your burning skin. Chase kisses planted all around except the one place you need him most. “Please Will.” 

Smirking from between your thick thighs spread open for his hungry mouth. Hands splayed over soft skin brushing back and forth to drag a shiver from your body. “Please what honey?” Not letting you answer, lips forming a perfect O around your clit and sucks deeply. Wicked tongue flicking like the beating wings of a hummingbird in flight. Extricating a scream of pleasure from your panting lips, back arching as hands shot down to card through his thick hair. Tugging on the locks harshly, trying to rut against his face. Whimpering when he pulls away to smack your pussy to reel your orgasm back in. Licking his lips of your essence, missing the bits still clinging to his bearded chin. “I need an answer sweetheart.” 

Head raising to half way on shaky elbows, glaring down at him, unprepared for the quick slide of two thick fingers deep into your quivering cunt. Choking out any form of coherent thought and dropping back against the sheets. One hand fisting the dark blue fabric as the other cups a breast, tugging at the nipple and adding little pinches to the gathering storm of need. Feeling those delicious tingles of pleasure lighting across your spine, dancing through your belly as the coil winds tighter in your body. With every thrust of those fingers, crooked upwards in a come hither movement, brushing against that little sponge spot making stars explode behind your eyes. 

Pride, desire and love dance across his veins at seeing you so wanton under his administrations. Carefully yet quickly opening you up by adding a third finger to stretch you. Pleasurable burn short circuiting what’s left of your thoughts, instead focusing on the indulgence of those thick fingers bottom knuckle deep inside you. “Look at you sweetheart, spread out over my bed, fingers deep inside this pretty cunt making you wither and moan my name. Fuck if you aren’t the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.” Mouth connecting with your clit dragging another loud moan of his name from your lips. 

“Like that Will, just fucking like that,” mumbling words, head thrashing against the pillows wanting to hold off till he’s inside you but with every thrust of the skilled fingers. Mouth drawing out different letters of the alphabet to make you quiver around his body. Moans and whimpers dripping from your lips punctuated with his name and various words of pleading. “Close Captain so fucking close.” 

“Cum for me sweetheart, fucking soak my hand and the bed under you.” Groaning at the use of his rank, cock twitching painfully inside the tight cotton confines of his black boxer briefs. Watching your back arch when he draws your clit between his lips and sucks hard, tongue flicking quickly to match his fingers. Groans added vibrations to your pleasure as his fingers keep the same quick pace sending you flying over the edge at his command careening into your orgasm. Breath gasping from your lungs, thighs trying to close around his head, shaking from the effort before they drop flat to the bed. His broad body blocks there bid as he works you through the high. Fingers sloshing through your soaked walls, mouth dropping to catch each drip to savor. Pulling from the squeezing depths that try to weakly suck them back in to his mouth and lick them clean. 

Surging up your body, cotton covered cock slotted against your soaked folds. Groaning when you weakly start to rut against him, eyes fluttering open to see him hovering over you on his forearms. “Hello there my Captain,” wrapping your arms around his neck and quickly bringing his lips to crash against yours. Nipping and tasting the remains of your tangy essence from his tongue that you promptly suck into the hot cavern of your mouth. Pulling a groan from the man above you who rocks against your drenched folds slick soaking through the cotton.          

Blindingly reaching over to open the top draw, grabbing a condom as your hands work to take his underwear off. Sighing in relief at being free, both of you fumbling together while lips are still locked in a heated battle. Gasping for breath and angling mouths to draw in air through your noses, sharing the hot commodity. Only breaking on a growl when your hand wraps around his hot shaft giving a hard squeeze and starting to pump slowly. Foreheads resting together, dragging the palm of your hand over the weeping crown, gathering the precum for lubrication. Till he pushes your hand away getting a huff of annoyance from your pouting lips. 

“Put that lip away sweetheart before I put you over my lap and spank that pretty ass of yours.” Ripping the condom package with his teeth and fingers, pulling the thin piece of latex from the confines. Only to have you snatch it up and slide down under him till your level with his throbbing cock. 

Placing a kiss to the angry red crown, lapping at the slit and getting a hiss from the man shaking above you. Smirk he doesn’t see but hears when you say, “You can owe me a punishment Captain but I wanted my taste.” Giving little kitty licks around the crown several more times. Enjoying how your making him shake, and rut against your body. You pull away to slide the condom over his cock, one last kiss to the head before shimming your plush frame against his and back up towards the pillows. Arms going around his neck to pull him back in for another kiss. 

Only to chase his mouth that he refuses to give you his lips, “Think your cute huh?” Rising up on his knees to spread your thighs over his, opening you up wide for him. Hands trailing over your body teasingly slow, pausing to pinch both nipples. Getting a whine from your chest that makes a smirk pull at his lips. Desire darken eyes lock with yours, “By the way sweetheart,” brow arched. Left hand wrapping around his cock pumping a few times before notching at your dripping entrance. Teasing you with just barely pushing the head in and back out. “That was one, I plan to pull at least three more from you before tonight is through.” 

Eyes widen at his declaration, “You…” choking on the words you’d planned to say with the hard thrust of his cock deep inside your tight channel. Silent scream forms on your lips, air quickly expelled by the force, hands scrabbling to grip his shoulders. 

Pausing to let you adjust to his girth, Will dips to capture a stiff peaked nipple into the hot cavern of his mouth. While arranging one thigh against your chest and draping the leg over his shoulder repeating the action with the twin. Folding you almost in half and sliding that much deeper into your pulsing depths letting your breast go to drop his head between them placing kisses trying to reign himself in. Not wanting to loose control and cum too soon. 

“Fuck sweetheart your so tight and wet for me,” moist breath heating your skin. Setting a hard punishing pace that has the head broad slamming into the wall with his masterful thrusts. Puling out till just the cock head rests at your entrance before surging forward hard and deep. Eyes rolling back as you gasp, clutching at his shoulders slick with sweat. 

Beading across his hairline to slide down his cheeks, cupping them with trembling hands and bringing his mouth back to yours in a desperate kiss. Tangling your tongues together, one leg slipping from his shoulder to wrap around his waist pressing into his pert ass and pushing him deeper if possible. The sheer girth of him splitting you open as he takes you hard and deep. Nipping his tongue twice and pulling away to gasp out just trying to gather air into your lungs. “Will,” name whimpered passed your lips fire dancing across your veins demanding more. 

“I know sweetheart, fuck I know,” growling low bringing your other leg to wrap around his waist. Reaching up to grip the head broad, thrusts shortening but still deep and quick. Chasing that high he knows isn’t long in coming with the way your walls quiver around him. “Honey you gotta give me another one, need you to cum for me.” Gritting his teeth, looking over your beautiful face soaking in the look of pleasure painted over your features, coated in sweat and desperation pinching your brows. 

Eyes tightly closed, little stars exploding, his words filtering through the sexual haze he’s brought over you. Heavy libs flutter open to watch him above you, rippling muscles, biceps flexing around you. Hands caress his back, coaxing his hands down to cage you in and press you deeper into the mattress. Hiking your legs higher on his waist, feeling his pelvis grind down against your clit sending shockwaves of pleasure to crest over you. Slipping one hand between your bodies needing a little push, only to have it brushed aside by Will’s larger hand. 

Callused fingers circling the little pulsing nub of your clit getting a breathy moan from your throat that chokes off into scream of his name ripped from your lips. Orgasm washing over your body, making you float between paradise and reality soaking his cock and making you gasp for breath, body shaking while surrounded by Will. His musky cologne, pine and cedar mixing with the scent of sex a heady fragrance that tingles your scenes. Silently chanting his name while he works you through the release. Little after shocks dance through your limbs, holding him closer and squeezing your still pulsing walls around him tighter. Feeling your slick spill out around him coating your inner thighs and down into the sheets. 

Bringing your mouth back to his for a sweet slow kiss, tangling your tongues together dragging a moan from the depths of his soul. Pace starting to falter with every quiver and clutch of your wet depths. Breaking apart to gasp for air, lungs burning, cock throbbing for release twice more he thrusts into your clutch channel. Emptying himself into the condom, movements slowing till he’s spent and drops carefully into your waiting arms. 

Brushing your fingers through his soaked hair, head resting between your own heaving breasts. Feeling moist air against your damp skin, hands sliding down his back, basking in the afterglow, “Definitely can’t get side tracked while  packing.”   

Pressing a kiss between your breasts looking up through heavy libs, “Why’s that honey?” 

“We’ll never leave,” soft giggles leaving your lips. Watching as Will raises up pressing kisses to each of your nipples, dipping to press one to your neck on one of the many marks he left behind. Brushing his beard over the sensitive skin of your throat, groaning when you clutch him tightly. “Not sure if I want to now. Might keep you in this bed that whole week instead,” smirk turned groan when he pulls from your depths carefully. Placing a quick kiss to your lips before sliding to the edge of the bed to tug the spent condom off, tying and tossing it into the trash bin on the other side of the night stand. 

Rolling to your side, head propped up on your hand watching as Will raises and heads to the bathroom to clean up. Admiring his firm ass, the play of muscles with each step, tongue peeking out to lick your lips at the delicious sight he presents you. On his return trip you shamelessly ogle his front, tugging your lip back between your teeth. “Fuck your gorgeous baby,” soft smile replacing the salacious smirk. 

“I can say the same about you sweetheart,” warm wet cloth in hand, he coaxes you to lay back and wipe the remains of your slick from your tender folds.

“Hmm, thank you William,” feeling shy in that moment, watching him toss the cloth into the hamper, before crawling into bed behind you. 

Strong arms wrap around your soft body to pull you against his hard chest, “Never have to thank me for taking care of you sweetheart.” 

Turning in his arms to rest face to face, placing a hand on his cheek, “Only if I get to thank you in other ways?” 

“And those would be?” Leaning close to rest your foreheads together. The arm around your waist pulls you flush against him warm palm cupping your ass getting a squeak from your kiss swollen lips. 

Tracing patterns over his tanned chest, circling a nipple giving a light pinch to the peaked tip. “You’ll have to wait and see, I won’t give away all my tricks so soon Tootsie roll.” 

“Tootsie roll?” Playful growl leaves his lips pushing you onto your back and hovering over you. “Oh sweetheart I’ll show you Tootsie roll.” 

Giggling and squirming under him thinking your life couldn’t be any better. With the man of your dreams giving you delicious beard burn and loving your body like no other. 

Till the weekend rolls around and you get to give him one of those special thank you’s. Waking him up with your warm mouth pleasuring him as the sun rose outside your tent and his deep moans echoing pleased smirk on your lips the rest of the day with how weak you made him that morning. 

[lord-explosion-baku]

The Return

Yandere!Midoriya x reader

warnings: yandere, mentions of violence, smoking, creepy, dark themes

A/N: This is just a short little snoot based on a scary story I used to tell around the fire while camping. Mind the warnings. 

It had been several years since Izuku Midoriya disappeared without a trace. The police and the heroes alike searched for months and months with nobody finding a damn thing. It was a national tragedy; Deku had the potential to change the world for the better and his loss would never be forgotten. There was even a day reserved for him where people would light green candles and place them on their porches and balconies where they would pray for his return. His mother wailed, his friends mourned, and you were free.

You were free. Free from those yearning stares, those two-long hand touches, those unsolicited gifts, and those unwarranted nighttime visits. You always knew you were never safe with Midoriya around—or possibly you were too safe—and when he stopped existing, your life had gotten better. Easier. You no longer had to live on edge, afraid of catching a tuft of green hair around every corner, spying on you through any window he could find, finding you even when you were out of town. He was gone. 

You were free. Until you weren’t.

It was all over the news: the surprising resurgence of the tragically-lost, rising hero Deku. You’d heard it and seen it. The man who claimed to be Izuku Midoriya had the same unruly, curly hair that bounced when he walked, the same eager, green eyes that complimented his innocent facade, and the same brutal scars from all those times he’d broken his bones that fed his emblem. He looked exactly like Midoriya, only more refined. He was more muscular, a tad taller, and there was a gleam in his eyes that hadn’t been there before. You’d heard from friends all about how he retained all of his memories from before his disappearance—even the ones that nobody would know about except for him—but had no memory of where he’d been or what had happened while he was lost.

There wasn’t a single soul on the planet that didn’t believe that Midoriya had returned. You knew better. You knew that he, whoever he was, was an imposter. But it wasn’t like you could prove it.

For weeks, you avoided places where you knew this faux-Midoriya was going to be. Friends invited you to ‘welcome back’ parties where Midoriya’s life would be celebrated, but you never showed. You didn’t take the main streets where you knew this new hero would be patrolling, always making sure to check the news to see every instance the camera caught him performing one of his many good deeds. You might’ve been getting a little obsessive yourself, but it was worth it to never have contact with the imposter.

It didn’t take much time for the long-forgotten creeping feeling to sneak its way into your home and on your skin. You didn’t think that faux-Midoriya would know to stalk you like the real Midoriya, especially since the real Midoriya had always kept that part of his life secret and safe, just as you kept the event that let you know Midoriya wasn’t really back locked away inside your mind. You hadn’t ever told anybody about it. Still, you knew he was watching you. You never saw him, but you felt him.

As the days progressed, this feeling only got worse. You would find bouquets of flowers left on your doorstep and little notes left on your car. You’d told you friends how you were feeling unsafe, dancing around the topic of how insane you thought the world was for buying that Midoroya had returned, but whenever you brought it up, you were met with rolling eyes and tea sips. Even Bakugou believed it was really Midoriya who had returned, and you’d only found out that little fact when you attended a rather large get-together at a nearby bar to celebrate a huge win for the Ground Zero hero agency.

The only reason you went out was because you thought Midoriya wasn’t going to be there. You missed seeing people, and you’d thought you were going to be safe since Bakugou never seemed to like Midoriya, but it seemed that years away from one’s annoying ex-rival softens one up a little.

Panic struck you as soon as you saw him. The imposter was chatting it up with another hero, asking them questions about their quirk and support items, much like the real Midoriya would be doing, when those soft green eyes slid over to you. His face lit up and he smiled that smile—the one that was only reserved exclusively for you, the one that made chills run down your spine.  

You were out the door immediately, shaking uncontrollably, crumbling against the bar’s side wall. It took a couple attempts for you to finally light the cigarette between your trembling fingers, but before you could take your first drag, you heard him speak.

“You really shouldn’t smoke.” His voice was like sweet cream, rich and soft. Your gaze went up to meet familiar kind, dishonest eyes. “You’ve always had such pretty skin. I’d hate to see you ruin it.”

“M-Midoriya,” you whispered, tone flat, voice hoarse. He crouched down beside you and brushed some of the hair in your face back and behind your hair. It was such a small gesture, but you felt completely violated.

“Hi, bunny,” not-Midoriya said, “It’s good to see you.”

You shook your head, because his appearance was absolutely uncanny. This man was Izuku Midoriya, only there was no possible way that could be true.

Midoriya seemed content by your befuddlement. You were sure he was enjoying this new life, eating up all the attention he’d gotten since his return, but he didn’t have you to torture. The real Midoriya could never live without filling you up with unease.

He eyed the cigarette burning between your fingers and clicked his tongue. “You’re shivering,” he mused, taking the cigarette out of your hand. He smiled faintly at its cherry, took a long drag, and put it out against the brick wall. Then, he clasped his hands over yours. “Do you know how much I’ve missed you?”

“Don’t-!”

His touch lingered like it always used to. He hummed and brushed his thumb down the palm of your hand, gazing up at you through too-long lashes. “I’ve missed that face you’re making too.”

You had to remind yourself that it wasn’t him. It couldn’t possibly be him. You knew better. You knew what happened. It wasn’t him.

“I know what you’re thinking.” Midoriya flashed a wide, pearly-white smile and brought your hand up to his cheek. He was warm from his blushing. He’d always been so warm. He closed his eyes and pushed your hands down to his neck—the last place you’d touched him when he was alive. “But you should know,” he whispered darkly, “nothing will ever keep me from my bunny for too long.”

“No,” you croaked, pulling your hand back. This wasn’t real. He was supposed to be gone. You were supposed to be free.

“Yes,” he crooned, eyes opened and gleaming with delight..

It couldn’t be him. It could never be him. Izuku Midoriya was gone, and this man was a fraud. You were sure of it. He could look, sound, and feel like him, but there was a zero percent possibility that he had returned.

You would know. You burned his body after you killed him.

TAGS FOR EVERYTHING(CLOSED): @ayeputita @yandere-inamorata @dee-madwriter @unboundbnha @rizamendoza1987 , @rubycubix @smbody-stole-mycar-radio @zellllyyyy @sarcastictextstuck @kpanime @lemonlordleah-shinzawa-kitten @captain-sin-allmight-queen @psionicsnow @wickedlewicked @ghost-of-todoroki @kattariapenn @im-an-adult-sometimes @bnhya @local-senpai @eggpienutbuttercroissant @usernamekate94 @reyvenclaww @hi-ho-and-hello 

[wonderlustlucas]

jack pot ; part 3 - hwang hyunjin

⇢ prompt You know it’s bad when you’re high as a kite and he’s still on your mind. ⇢ pairing hwang hyunjin x female reader ⇢ word count 6.4k ⇢ genre fluff & angst (not heavy, just in a slow burn kind of way) ⇢ warnings (18+) drug use, a suggestive make out & the mention of a boner twice maybe ⇢ summary College is a matter of working hard and playing hard. It’s an opportunity to start fresh, to grow as an individual and to blossom with those you befriend. People come and people go, leaving their mark on your life and showing you all the parts of becoming an adult. Some, however, do more than leave their mark. Some take just as much as they give. Things become complicated once they take the entirety of your love because you outright offered it to them.—college!au ; stoner!au ; friends to lovers!au ⇢ a/n AAAAAAAA omg im so excited to post this, this by far is my fav part of jack pot & i cant wait to hear what u all think!!! sorry its a bit shorter than the other parts, & technically this is the *last* part, but there will be an epilogue where you will see how everything comes to be!!!! have fun reading!!! <3

⇠ part 2

five.

“Oh, fuck, he’s good,” Yeji gasps, shoving her phone into Maddie’s hands before faceplanting into the table.

“Are you H-T-T-P because I’m colon-slash-slash without you,” Maddie reads with a chuckle, thumbs hesitating over the keyboard. “Quick, YN, look up some pick-up lines.”

Closing the tab on the article you should be reading but has been long forgotten, you promptly do as you are told and open the first link from your search, Minho and Jisung leaning in to help. “There,” Jisung stops you, pointing to one, “’Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you.’”

The table can’t help but burst into laughter at such a sentence. It’s stupid, but ever since Yeji and Kim Sunwoo began texting, their conversations have been full of tacky puns and emoji-filled compliments.

“Damn,” Maddie whistles, setting the phone back into Yeji’s limp hand, “he’s already typing back.”

“Gross,” Ryujin teases, busy typing away on her laptop. How she manages to multitask so well is a skill you certainly lack. “Why don’t you just like, I don’t know, ask him out?” Jisung asks and when you glance up, he’s looking at you. “Because that’s the guy’s job,” Maddie quickly saves the day, winking to you when you send her a grateful smile.

“Bullshit,” Jeongin scoffs. Everyone, even Ryujin, stops to look at him.

Did he just curse?

“I mean, like,” he stammers, cheeks turning rosy at all the attention, “it’s 2020. Guys have insecurities, too.”

“I agree,” Minho hums, looking to Maddie with hearts in his eyes, “that kind of confidence is enough to make any boy fall in love.”

“Yeah, but—”

Lia rebuts, but your attention quickly falls elsewhere when a text message first appears on your laptop, then your phone.

hwang hyunjin🦔🕺🏻💞🧻 [now] Where r u rn?

Unable to fight your smile, you quickly type back.

[3:39 PM] YN: outside hollin st café [3:39 PM] YN: why? :)

“Have you seen their new house, YN?” Minho asks, prompting you to click your phone off and set it back on the table. “Whose house?”

“Changbin’s parents.”

“Oh,” shaking your head, you distantly curse Chan for keeping your friend busy today. Unlike Jisung, Changbin likes to write lyrics and do whatever other music stuff during the day at a normal time instead of the middle of the fucking night while stoned and trying to finish his computer science assignments at the same time. “No, he forgot to send me pictures.”

“Dude,” Jisung sighs dreamily, “it’s huge. So nice. I think the front door alone could cover tuition.”

“Is it really that nice?” Maddie asks in awe.

“He started to show me pics the other day but couldn’t finish but the kitchen… unnecessary,” Ryujin quips, pausing her work to check her phone. “Yeah, it’s insane. The whole place is unnecessary but the kitchen is like, a house in itself,” Jeongin hums, head shaking in disbelief.

“Damn, now I really want to see it,” you sigh, making a mental note to hunt Changbin down so he can show you. “It’s like Hyunjin and his rings,” Minho snickers, “he has so many. Whenever we’re out, if he sees a ring, boom. It’s his.”

Well, he’s not wrong but… You bite your tongue no matter how badly you wish to defend Hyunjin and his affinity for rings and jewelry in general. The boy has taste, what can you say? You certainly are not complaining about Hyunjin’s long fingers and the way he chooses to decorate them.

“I never thought I’d hear Changbin’s parent’s kitchen be analogous to Hyunjin’s jewelry collection, yet here we are,” Maddie chuckles, leaning over Yeji to peek at her conversation with Sunwoo.

“Wow, speak of the devil,” Jisung pipes up of course as soon as you have reopened the tab to your assignment. Changbin or Hyunjin, you don’t know, head whipping up to find out and a peculiar mix of relief and panic settling over you once you spot the latter. “Uh oh, YN’s gonna go into cardiac arrest.”

As subtly as you can, you elbow Jisung in the stomach and smile at Hyunjin as he nears. “Hey,” keeping his eyes on you, Hyunjin approaches your table and stops behind Maddie opposite from you, “I’m sorry, I should have asked if you were busy.” His cheeks, already flushed, burn pinker once he looks away to smile weakly at everyone else.

“I’m not busy!” You squeak, scrambling to close your laptop and shove it in your bag. “Are you sure? I can come back later?” He offers, tilting his head and this is when you realize he is holding a bubble tea in each hand. And from the looks of it, one seems to be your usual order. “No, she’s not,” Jeongin answers for you, recognizing your stupefied expression.

“I was just – yeah. No,” rushing to stand and swing your legs out around the bench, you nearly fall flat on your face, “I wasn’t doing anything, actually.” Steadying yourself with a hand on Minho’s shoulder, you heave a labored breath before carefully walking to meet Hyunjin.

“Okay,” he beams, either oblivious to how flustered you are or simply choosing to ignore it. Turning to wave to your friends, he hands you one of the cups and you realize it is, in fact, your favorite boba. Oh boy. “See ya later,” you wave to them as well, nose wrinkling when both Jisung and Maddie wink in return.

Following after Hyunjin, you finally allow yourself to take notice of his attire and can’t help but feel confused. He looks good. And not in the good attractive way—he always looks good. But good as in formal. It’s four o’clock on a Tuesday in October and he’s out here looking as if he just got out of a business meeting. White button-down tucked into fitted black slacks, dress shoes, black tie, and he even has a black suit jacket draped over his arm. His hair is styled, too; ever since he dyed it back to black, he’s been growing it out long enough for his bangs to cover his eyes. Now, however, it’s parted down the middle and seems as if he’s ever so slightly curled it away from his face.

Suddenly, you feel ridiculous walking beside him in mom jeans and a baggy sweatshirt from high school.

“Thanks for the boba,” you mumble around your straw, brain still preoccupied trying to get over how utterly handsome he is. “Why do you look so fancy?”

The side of his mouth twitches up at your words, but his eyes stay glued to the sidewalk as you continue to your unknown destination. “I had an audition,” Hyunjin admits, voice devoid of emotion as if it’s not important at all. “An audition?” You echo. “Why do you sound so not super mega excited? How did it go? What was it for?”

“Well—”

“Wait!” You interrupt, stopping your walk once you realize he had an audition and you didn’t know. “You had an audition? What – why didn’t you tell me?”

Hyunjin frowns, avoiding your gaze and dragging his bottom teeth over his top lip. “I didn’t tell anyone,” he finally says before reaching for your hand and tugging you away from the walkway and into your campus’ main courtyard. “Why? Is it some sort of secret or something, Hyunjin?” You scoff, sounding way more annoyed than you intended. But you are annoyed; why didn’t he want to tell anyone?

“No,” he sighs, finding an empty area in the grass and lowering himself to sit, “I just… didn’t want anyone to know. Didn’t want to make it a big deal.”

“Hyunjin,” you sigh, visibly softening for him and settling down next to him, crisscrossing your legs, “it is a big deal. I don’t know what it’s for, but if it’s important enough for you to audition, then it’s important to us, too. You don’t need to be humble twenty-four-seven, you know. I’m sure you could have used our support.”

“I didn’t get it, though,” Hyunjin whispers, “they just – I didn’t get in. I wasn’t good enough.” Sensing the sadness in his voice, you find a lump forming in your throat when you notice the way his bottom lip trembles. “Hey,” panicking, you set your boba down and sit up on your knees to wrap your arms around him, cradling his head into your chest once tears start falling, “no. Don’t ever say you’re not good enough, Hyunjin.”

“But if I did better, practiced more, than I would—"

“Stop,” you hush, combing your fingers through his hair and brushing strands away from his eyes, “I’ve never met someone who works as hard as you do. You can’t beat yourself up over this. Everything happens for a reason. You don’t know what could have happened if you got in. You could have hurt yourself eventually, or maybe met someone who’s a real asshole.”

“Yeah,” is all he says, quiet and muffled when he turns to press his forehead into your sternum, body still trembling as he lets out all his tears. You stay like that for a while, holding him against you and soothing a hand up and down his back until his sniffling falls quiet. “Listen,” you finally sigh, grabbing him by the shoulders and pulling him back. Your heart sinks once you take in the wet trails down his cheeks and the puffiness of his eyes. “Forget about it. Was it something for dance?”

When he nods subtly, you cup his face in your hands and swipe his cheeks with your thumbs. “You are an amazing dancer, Hyunjin. You can’t let this get to your head. And I don’t want you working your ass off more than you do already. Practice makes perfect, sure, but you need to rest. What about the idea Changbin came up with?”

“The YouTube thing?”

“Yes! Filming dance tutorials or just posting your routines is a really good idea,” you remind him, wiping your hands on your jeans once he falls back onto the grass with a gentle thud, hair flaying around him like a halo. Your limbs twitch with the urge to lie beside him, maybe throw an arm around him and rest your cheek on his chest, fingers tracing the soft features of his face, stroking through his hair and reminding him just how innately perfect he is, inside and out. You, of course, resist such a temptation, flopping down beside him and staring up at the clouds with a heavy heart.

“I could do that. Maybe,” Hyunjin huffs. Tilting your head to look at him, you find yourself knee-deep in that familiar longing feeling, pausing simply to appreciate how pretty he is in the evening sun, cheeks rosy from crying and hair begging to be touched. Shaking your head to rid such daydreams, you remind yourself how fragile his emotions are right now. Now is no time to get caught up on a fantasy. Reaching for your tea, you lean up on an elbow and redirect your gaze to the trees, the promise of winter having turned what was green burnt sienna and butterscotch, leaving trees barren and branches swaying gently in the crisp breeze that leaves you curling into yourself. “You should,” you hum, distant, mind clawing to come up with the words you want to say.

“Come here,” Hyunjin says now, voice stronger than before and when his hand wraps gently around your wrist, you can’t find it in yourself to resist. Allowing him to pull you back down beside him, you curl into his side, resting your head a safe distance away from his own and onto the curve of his arm. “Thank you for being so good to me,” he expresses. You squeeze your eyes shut when the arm you lie on wraps around your shoulders and pulls you substantially closer. “I need to tell you something.”

A long stretch of silence falls upon you and for a moment, you are unsure the words even left your mouth. What are you thinking?

“Wait! I have something first,” Hyunjin sighs, missing the way your breath hitches. “Okay,” you whisper, fiddling with one of the buttons on his shirt and focusing all your attention there.

“I just – I think… I owe you an apology,” he finally says, “I need to apologize for something that I did a while ago that I know probably hurt.” Your chest tightens. There’s a lot that has hurt you when it comes to Hyunjin, but none that he’s done purposely. None that are his fault. None that he should be apologizing for.

“I feel like we came to some mutual understanding to not mention what happened when we were freshmen, but it kills me to know that – that something happened, and we never talked about it,” Hyunjin starts, grip tightening on your shoulder and suddenly, you think you are dreaming. This cannot possibly be real. “I know it was awkward but, I also know me and Yiren dating was… ah. I don’t know.”

When he falls silent, you are unsure of what to say or do. You have no idea what the end goal of this conversation is. Hardly a minute ago, your heart and your brain decided it was time to tell him. Now, you’re not so sure you can do that until he finishes, and you are not about to give him your two cents if his reasoning for bringing it up is not the same as yours.

“I just want to apologize for not being brave enough to talk to you about it. I know I was confused, but I’m sure it was worse for you when they told you about her,” Hyunjin continues, sensing your rendered silence, “and it’s been so long since that happened, and now, you’re one of my closest friends.” Ouch.

“But I’ve been thinking,” when he picks up again, your eyes fly open in a panic. He’s been thinking. Hyunjinhas been thinking. You think you are going to pass out. “And I just feel like we… me and you, I mean—"

The standard iPhone alarm blares from beside you, promptly cutting him off and you think it is the biggest cockblock known to man. “Shit,” he hisses, leaning up to tug his phone from his pocket and in the process nudging you from your comfortable position. Sitting back up, nerves aflame and heart racing, your brows shoot up in confusion when all he does is stare at the number calling him. “What are you doing?”

“It’s the studio I was just at,” he scoffs in disbelief, barely glancing at you before looking back to his phone. You have never wanted to shrivel up and die as much as you want to right now. “Well? Aren’t you going to answer?”

Hyunjin makes a noise of acknowledgement before tapping the green icon and bringing the phone to his ear. “Hello?”

Sitting quietly beside him, you watch with a forced smile as his hummed responses and subtle nods morph into enthusiastic laughs and wide, beaming smiles. Hyunjin notices your confusion when you tilt your head, mouthing a ‘What?’ to him.

“They made a mistake,” he whispers, covering the speaker of his phone, “read off the wrong Hwang. I’m in.” When he grins excitedly at you, your response isn’t as cheerful as it could be. As it should be. “Yay!” You whisper, clapping gently but quickly turning to your boba when the other line begins speaking again. Looking away, you take a hefty sip, nearly choke on a tapioca ball, and build the walls around your heart up all over again in a matter of seconds.

“I’ve gotta go,” whispering, you manage one more pained smile before getting to your feet and wiping your butt of any possible grass stains, “good luck!” When he shines you one more breathtaking smile and waves excitedly, you hastily head in the other direction, wrapping your arms around yourself and swallowing past the lump that threatens to form the farther you walk.

It must be nice, you think, frantically wiping at your waterline. Must be nice to put yourself out there and have things work out the way you want them to. Must be nice being told you’re ‘in,’ you’re wanted, you’re desired.

It must be nice.

six.

Pick up food, you said. Ask Jisung, you said.

Your conscience is a big fat oompa loompa ass bitch. You would have never called Jisung to ask him if he wanted anything from Taco Bell if you knew he was with Changbin. And not just Changbin, you realized four minutes into your call; Seungmin and Hyunjin, too. Apparently he went over their place to record, or something, and didn’t care to let you know. Not that you’re his mom and he has too—but it would have been nice, and would have saved you from spending almost fifty dollars at Taco Bell.

“I tried calling Jisung but he didn’t answer,” you snap once Seungmin answers your call with a muffled hello. “Can one of you please come out and help me carry this in?” You glance at the five large sodas and two bags full of food in your passenger seat with a grimace. “Sure,” he agrees and you make a mental note for the umpteenth time just how much you love Seungmin, “I’ll be out in a sec.”

True to his word, you spot him making his way out of their apartment and across the small courtyard to meet you by your car not even a minute later, hauling each bag under his arms. “Thank you,” left only with the cupholder, you hurriedly lock your car and follow after him. “No problem. Thanks for being our Uber Eats,” then, pursing his lips, “how much was this?”

“Forty-seven something,” you grumble unhappily, knowing this was a big hit to your debit. “We’ll pay you back, don’t worry,” Seungmin smiles, leading you up the final flight of stairs and kicking open the ajar door.

Immediately, you’re hit with the smell.

“Dear, fucking hell,” making a face, you rub your nose to keep from sneezing, “it reeks in here. How have you guys not been kicked out yet?”

The stench of weed generally does not bother you anymore, but still—they could light a candle, or something. Seungmin shrugs, setting the bags down on the kitchen counter. “Luck, I guess.”

“IS THAT YN?” From another room, you hear Changbin shout, followed by an excited shriek from Jisung. “They’re high. Very high. You’ve been warned,” Seungmin whispers just as tweedle dee and tweedle dum themselves come flying around the corner. “YN!” Jisung grins, engulfing you in a dramatic hug. “Watch,” you hiss, regarding the blunt held between his fingers that comes dangerously close to your hair.

“Sorry,” he smiles, then, without warning, sticks the thing right between your lips. “I didn’t even offer.” Well, when life gives you lemons…

You hesitantly take the hit and blow the smoke away from him. You weren’t planning on getting high today, but here you are. “Thanks,” shaking your head as if that will clear it, you turn to Changbin and snugly wrap your arms around him. Every day you thank the heavens that he is a chill, calm high, unlike your maniac of a roommate.

“Thanks for the food,” fishing into his pockets and pulling out a crumpled ten-dollar bill, he slaps it into your palm. You only hum in reply, shoving it into your own pocket and praying you don’t lose it before you remember to put it in your wallet. “Where’s Hyunjin?” You ask, no longer caring about being slick.

“In his room,” Seungmin answers, rummaging through the bags to find what he ordered. Then, “HYUNJIN!” You jump, reaching for your soda and standing away from the other three until they have claimed whatever belongs to them. No sooner than Seungmin calls for him, you hear a door being cracked open and out comes Hyunjin.

He looks extremely disheveled. Like, just woke up from a two-month hibernation, disheveled. In the blink of an eye, however, he rakes a hand through long blonde hair and promptly sets a baseball cap backwards to keep the strands away and suddenly, he doesn’t look so disheveled anymore. You force yourself to look away, cursing the way your gut twists.

“Gimme my crunchwrap,” you say around your straw, snatching the blunt from Jisung’s fingers and moving around him to fetch your dinner. He doesn’t even protest.

He knows you need it more than he does.

“That’s a lot of food,” Hyunjin says once he has finally entered the kitchen, voice groggy and eyes puffy from sleep. Or from being high, you can’t tell. Pressing his chest to your back, he wraps one arm around you to keep you against him while the other reaches into a bag to take what’s his. Swallowing past the desert dryness of your throat, you manage a thick inhale from the blunt before tilting your head to look at him and mentally thanking the other three for taking it as their cue to head out.

“Not my fault you guys eat like animals,” you chuckle shakily, trying to ignore the firmness of his body against yours, veins prominent on the arm that holds you against him and the ripple of muscle along his abdomen noticeable even through his shirt and yours. Dear god, it is too early for this. Not even seven o’clock and you are already drooling in more places than one.

Hyunjin pouts as if it is not true. “How much do I owe you?” He asks, finally moving away to grab his drink and you can’t help your disappointment, quickly finishing the blunt before tapping it out into one of the many ashtrays. “Don’t worry about it,” you wave off, digging through their drawers for a paper plate.

“YN,” Hyunjin deadpans, regarding you with a raised brow once you come up and begin unwrapping your food. You refuse to look him in the eye. “What do I owe you?” He repeats, firmer this time and it sends a chill down your spine when it most certainly should not. Sighing, you retrieve the receipt from your pocket and count everything he got. “Thirteen.”

Humming in content, Hyunjin reaches for his wallet on the counter and pulls a ten and five out. “There,” he beams, tucking the bills into your pocket himself. Rolling your eyes, you pray he does not notice how you flush and hurry out of the kitchen to join Seungmin on the sofa.

“House Hunters?” You ask with a laugh, looking at the TV once you have settled next to him. “I told you HGTV is the best.”

Seungmin hums in agreement. “I thought it was stupid at first, but Hyunjin was watching Fixer Upper and I got addicted,” he says, nodding to the older boy doing a little dance in the kitchen as he eats one of his tacos. Your heart does somersaults at the sight. “They’re all so good,” you agree after taking a few bites of your own food, eyes trained on the television, “House Hunters is a classic, though.”

“I like the international one,” Hyunjin adds on his way over, crashing unceremoniously next to you. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Seungmin wrinkle his nose when Hyunjin sets his free hand casually on your thigh. “Shh,” he grumbles, vaguely gesturing to the screen and chewing a mouthful of food, “I wanna hear what the house has.”

One episode turns to two, which turns to three, which turns to four, and suddenly you have been watching House Hunters with Seungmin and Hyunjin for almost three hours. It definitely is the weed, always making time perpetually slower, and it did not help when Jisung and Changbin reappeared sometime during your binge with one of Felix’s bongs. Not necessarily how you intended to spend your precious Friday night, but there is no sense in complaining when you are with your buddies and Hyunjin, of course.

Taco Bell long gone, you watch with blurry eyes when Hyunjin gets up from his slumped position against you to head into the kitchen and open the freezer. This, as well as the realization that House Hunters has ended and gone to some other, not-as-cool show, brings both you and Seungmin somewhat back to reality.

“It’s almost ten,” Seungmin announces, staring dazedly at the time on his phone. You hum in acknowledgment, certainly sober enough to reply but simply too lazy to. “I think I’m going to bed. Or play something. Don’t wreck the place,” he sighs, dragging a hand down his face before standing up. “G’night, Minnie,” you smile, watching with a furrowed brow as he continues down the hall and into his room. It isn’t until you hear his door click shut does the weight of being alone with Hyunjin settle on your chest.

It’s not like you haven’t spent time alone with Hyunjin before. In fact, that usually is the way it’s been in the past three years; whether the two of you decided to do your own thing or the rest of your friends eventually left or went to bed, you are used to this feeling. Used to ignoring the butterflies in your gut when he does something particularly cute and used to tampering down the mental images you conjure up knowing it’s just you and him.

But that doesn’t make things any easier. No matter how hard you try, you simply can’t help but feel this way around Hyunjin, especially when you’re alone. That’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

“Whatcha wanna watch?” Hyunjin asks around one last spoonful of ice cream before setting the pint back into the freezer. “Uhh…” You drone, blinking heavily at the TV and back to him as he makes his way back over. “I dunno, I’m sure you’ve been watching some drama. You can put that on.”

“You sure?” He asks with a raised brow, collapsing next to you and slumping dramatically halfway down the cushions. “Yes,” laughing, you find yourself reaching out to tuck messy strands of hair back behind his ear without hesitation, “also, why are you wearing a hat inside?”

Hyunjin pauses, straining to look up as if he will be able to see the back of his cap against his forehead. “I’m wearing a hat?”

“Yes, you idiot,” in comes the endless weed giggles and you find yourself unable to stop laughing, watching with teary eyes as he sits up and takes his hat off. “I don’t remember putting this on,” he chuckles airily, flipping the cap back and forth in his hands before tossing it onto the coffee table. “Should I cut it?”

“No!” You shout a little too quickly and a little too loudly. Shrinking against the arm of the couch, you ignore his amused smile and look to his long hair, freshly bleached strands falling down to his neck and shorter pieces brushing against his cheeks. Fuck, it should be illegal to look this good. “I like it long. It really suits you.”

“It’s annoying,” Hyunjin grins despite his complaint, lifting his legs onto the couch and flopping onto his side, head now resting on your lap. “I don’t know what to do with it.”

Now that he’s offered playing with his hair on a silver platter, you don’t hesitate combing your fingers through it, tugging out pieces stuck under his head and brushing it out completely. “You could pull the sides back,” you hum distantly, separating a section of hair near his temple to pull back, “or make a bun with what you can. You just have to play around with it.”

Humming in agreement, Hyunjin resituates himself after reaching for the remote and switching to Netflix. When you go back to simply raking your fingers from root to tip in irregular directions, you don’t miss the way his eyelids flutter at the motion and make sure to pay extra attention to his scalp. When this turned into a head massage, you’re not entirely sure.

The drama Hyunjin puts on is unbearable. You stopped paying attention a while ago, focusing more on him and how he seems to enjoy it, fingers busy braiding random sections of hair, taking them out, and then braiding them again. With two finally done the way you want them to, you are midway through the third when your fingers begin to cramp up.

“Why’d you stop?” Hyunjin asks seconds after you drop the braid and stretch your fingers out. “Fingers are cramping,” chuckling at the disappointed pout of his lips, you crack what knuckles you can before going back and undoing the unfinished braid. “Oh,” he mutters, cheek still pressed against your leg, “feels good.”

Humming in response, you ignore the way his words make your heart swell and begin gathering all his hair into a ponytail, pressing the braids to lay flat and finally tying it with a hair tie once you have combed up all that you can. Immediately, his bangs and hairs closer to the nape of his neck fall out, leaving the ponytail spikey and messy. At least the braids look good. You can’t help but giggle.

“What?” Hyunjin asks, pausing his show and leaning up. “What’d you do?”

“Go see for yourself,” pointing to the bathroom, you comb out a looped piece of hair before he stands to do just that. His ponytail bobs the entire walk there.

When he reaches the door and flips the light on, you watch from your position as he checks himself out, brushing away his bangs and flicking the pony. You frown when he accidentally yanks at a braid.

“Come here,” you say, sitting up, “you messed up the braid.”

“Honestly,” Hyunjin considers his reflection one last time before skipping his way over, “it doesn’t look half bad.” Expecting him to sit back next to you, your pulse quickens when he anchors a hand to the armrest and leans in front you, only inches away from your face. “No, definitely,” you say once you have gotten over the shock of him being so close so suddenly, “I like it in the ponytail. You’d really impress the girls if you braided your hair yourself.” Reaching up to tuck hair back into the braid and press it down flat once more, you don’t miss the way his brows draw together and lips twitch down. “What?”

Time ceases to exist as Hyunjin begins to come closer. In reality, you know it simply is a matter of seconds, but all of space and time seems to still once he leans forward. It feels as if an eternity goes by, allowing you to count each individual eyelash, memorize the details of his skin, take note of the smoothed lines on his plump lips. The way time slows is cruel; it allows panic to set in, the realization that he most certainly is looming over you with his eyes on your lips sending a spark of excitement and anxiety through your veins.

And then, just as this realization and this panic has set your nerves aflame, a gentle hand comes to cradle your jaw before Hyunjin’s lips press against yours.

It is so easy to surrender to the taste and touch of him. Instantly, an eruption of emotions and thoughts spiraling out of control fills you, yet your brain focuses only on Hyunjin, Hyunjin, Hyunjin. This is not the first time you have kissed him, nor the first time simply having him so close, but the feeling that radiates from your heart outward is unlike anything you have felt before. This is uncalled for. This is not like two years ago. You were not expecting this.

Hyunjin sighs into the kiss when you lean up to loop your arms around his neck. No sooner have you done this, he breaks away to sit beside you once more, hands reaching for your waist and guiding you to sit over his lap.

You could kiss him all day, you think, palms lying flat by his collarbones before fisting the material of his shirt when his tongue prods at the seam of your lips. Blood seemingly coming to a boil and nerves sparking dangerously, you find yourself quickly sobering up as the minutes tick by, completely and utterly addicted to him and this feeling, this feeling you have craved but never crossed the line for. And now, it’s yours to keep.

Forgetting the braids, you seize the opportunity to rake your fingers through his hair. Different, than how you did earlier. Desperate. Combing it away from his face once, twice, swallowing his groans when you tug at the roots, you realize with a whine that his hands have left your face in favor of dragging down your sides, circling back to squeeze at your breasts, rubbing at your thighs and finally sliding back to your ass, situating you more comfortably on his thighs.

When Hyunjin finally breaks the kiss to journey elsewhere, littering chaste kisses across your jaw, below your ear, down your neck, the weight of your actions finally hits you. It is overwhelming, the way you come spiraling back to reality, and you are not sure if the quiet moan that leaves you is due to the press of something else against your thigh or simply the realization that you are making out with Hyunjin.

You have to stop before you get hurt again.

“Hyunjin,” you gasp, shuddering when his soft lips brush against your jaw, “wait. We need to talk.”

He pauses at this, fingers digging into your sides and you feel his frown against your neck. “What’s there to talk about?” He murmurs, arms sliding around you and tugging you closer, prompting you to wrap your arms around his neck and hug him close and pretend like his boner isn’t digging into you.

It’s your turn to frown. “About us,” whispering, you lift one hand to stroke through his hair, “we need to talk about us.”

“I thought my feelings were very clear,” Hyunjin scoffs, all tenderness in his voice gone. Instinctively, you lean back, blinking at him in surprise. “Unless this is just another one of your games? Does this not mean anything to you, YN? I don’t think I could stomach you running off to Changbin or fucking Chan again.”

His words pierce your heart before you have even fully processed them, hurt flashing across your features and your body goes numb. “What?” Is all you can manage, scrambling to get away from him, chest heaving and eyes suddenly burning with the brine of tears. “What are you talking about, Hyunjin?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about!” He shouts. You flinch, not from the way he raises his voice, but from the genuine sadness in his eyes. “The past three years have been a constant battle with you. We’re best friends, for fucks sake, I figured out a long time ago that you have feelings for me. Feelings more than best friends. Yet every fucking time we started moving in the right direction, you turned your back on me.”

You can do nothing but stand there and let the tears fall. All the words and bottled emotions you wish to say are right there on the tip of your tongue, but you simply cannot bring yourself to voice them. Not when he’s right. Not when you have turned your back on him time and time again.

And then, he hisses more to himself than you, “Is this just sloppy seconds? You never once thought about my feelings in all of this?”

The anger brewing within you suddenly bursts from the dam and hisses through your body like deadly poison. “Sloppy seconds?” You snarl, fists clenching. “Who the fuck do you think you are? Your feelings? You just said you know how I feel about you, so why didn’t you ever do anything about it? How was I supposed to know you felt the same?”

“I thought it was pretty fucking obvious,” Hyunjin spits back, gaze narrowing, “didn’t think I had to spell out the fact that I like you, YN. You’re a smart girl.”

“Do not treat me like a child,” clenching your jaw, you have to look away for a moment, pacing one, two, three steps, hands raking through your hair and wiping away the stream of tears from your cheeks. You have never been filled with such rage. Having finally reached its boiling point, it now consumes you whole, sweeping off in waves and destroying all boundaries. “Confessing is not an easy thing, as you apparentlyknow, so don’t make me seem like the only idiot here. But maybe I was wrong about you if you think of me as just sloppy seconds.”

“I never said that!” Hyunjin barks, standing up to grasp your wrist when you turn away to grab your keys. “Don’t put words in my mouth! I would never, never think of you that way. I just don’t understand why you never spoke up after all this time. I’ve been dying, YN, you have no clue how badly I have been—”

“Oh, believe me, I know,” you snap, yanking your arm away from him, “I told you, Hyunjin. Telling someone you love them isn’t as easy as learning to ride a bike. You’re right, I have turned my back on you. But not intentionally. I’ve been scared, I’m a pussy, whatever.” Biting your top lip as if it will stop the tears that continue to fall freely, you avoid looking at him and glance back to find not only Seungmin, but Jisung and Changbin, too, peeking out from their doors with eyes blown wide with shock. Once you have noticed them, however, they panic and scramble to get out of sight.

Sighing shakily, you look back to Hyunjin and cannot ignore the way your heart sinks at the sight of him. Even upset, he is beautiful. You wonder how much you will see him after this.

“You don’t have to tell me you like me back to make me feel better, Hyunjin,” bouncing on your heels, you suddenly feel exhausted, body and soul heavy with the words you not only spoke, but heard, too. “We can figure this out another day, but for now, I need to go home. I’ll see you.”

Turning away once more, you do not make it very close to the front door before he stops you once more. “Wait, YN,” Hyunjin huffs, smiling softly when he reaches for your hand and you do not pull away. Running his tongue over his lip, he seems to hesitate for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts.

“Did you mean it when you said you love me?”

⇢ epilogue

[league-of-thots]

Leave Me a Message

Pairing: Hawks x reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, some suggestive themes, um gl with this? im told by my beta it was very sad

Words: 9.4k 

A/N: so um. this happened. First off, if you’d like to go break your heart some more, go check out the MASTERLIST because everyone worked super hard on these and there are some really amazing writers.

Og, this was supposed to be 3k, and then it just kept going and im suffering ok jesus that was so long. it was also kind of a way for me to get out some of my own inner turmoil around some stuff and i fucking loved writing it. ...not to be lame but yes i did cry writing it (shhh) anyways, i hope you enjoy? as much as you can enjoy angst of course.

         Hawks doesn’t do commitment. He’d said that from the start, that he wasn’t out looking for someone to try and grab his heart from out his chest, that he was simply looking for someone to keep his body company. He told you that he was tired of the press making a big deal of him being single, that all you would have to is hang out with him a bit, dates and couple things. He said that he’d been missing some company, that it would be amazing to have someone to spend some of his (very little) time off of patrol with. It was simple to you, who wouldn’t take the opportunity to be on the arm of a successful pro hero? Who would turn down the chance to learn more about the elusive Hawks, the one who’d baffled the media’s attempts to discover anything about him at all?

         You told yourself you weren’t going to make the mistake of getting attached, he was the number two hero after all, he had so much choice. There was no way you were going to be an idiot about it, this was only for some curiosity about the man.

         You enter the bar, a little awestruck at how clean and upscale it was. Of course, it wasn’t too surprising given the fact that this was the number 2 pro hero. He was bound to have some cash to throw around for a good time, plus he’d already told you that he’d be paying for the night.

         How could you refuse him?

         The night started out slow, the two of you lightly discussing regular day to day topics, but it intrigued you how carefully he spoke about everything. You didn’t really know him but you could’ve sworn that he had a plan with everything that he said, that everything he did was carefully calculated. To be honest, it was a little chilling, but as the alcohol started flowing along with the conversation, he relaxed a bit and you had to admit that he was a really fun person to talk to.

         The two of you had gotten closer in the circular booth as the night had gone on, blaming the loud surroundings and dim light so that you could see and hear each other better. He had this dry wit that left you struggling for breath as you laughed at his jokes and his teasing. He seemed to be enjoying himself too, but honestly, you couldn’t really read him at all.

         It was getting into the wee hours in the morning when the conversation took a more serious turn, the conversation starting to be about what this was, and what this would be.

         He was quite direct that he’d make it worth your while

“No offense, love, but if I’m being completely honest, I’m just not good at relationships. They’re not my thing. But I’m lonely and bored, and honestly? You caught my eye.” He’d said this in a low voice to you at the bar, his breath tickling your ear and you flutter your eyelashes up at him.

         “Are you asking me for a night of fun, Mr. Hawks?” you say coyly.

         “Maybe a night, maybe more if I like you.” He leans in to whisper to you, “You’ve got a pretty good chance babe.”

         “You’re not worried about me not liking you?” you weren’t really taken aback; it was to be expected from the number two hero that if you came to meet him, you were interested in him for sure.

         He leans back, with his hands behind him. “If I’m reading your body language right, and I’m pretty good at that y’know, then I’d say you’ve been pretty excited the whole night.”

         You laugh a bit at that. “Well, you’re not wrong I guess.”

         “Then I have nothing to worry about at all.”

           Your arrangement with Hawks started as a few dates in more secluded public areas, the first being a movie which you’d taken a bus to get too. When you’d gotten there, you went inside like he had asked you too. There, you saw him in the furthest corner, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. It wasn’t working well and you had to stifle a giggle as you walked up to him.

         The only reason that people didn’t seem to be coming up to him was the fact that the normally upbeat and friendly hero was closed off, and looking rather downtrodden.

         “Hey, Hawks.” You say, bumping his shoulder with your own playfully. “How’re you doing.”

         “Better now that you’re here,” he smoothly slips his arm into yours, face morphing into a slightly happier expression. “Would you happen to be a fan of popcorn and a drink at the movies, Y/N?”

         “Of course! How can you have one without the other?” He smiles at that, a quick upturn of his lips and its quickly gone again as he guides you to the counter to get some snacks and drinks. It wasn’t supposed to be an incredibly exciting movie, but it was supposed to be decent enough that the two of you could enjoy it together and relax without really having to push through any awkward tension that could still be around with the two of you being relative strangers.

         It was like a neutral ground to start off the fake relationship, while the two of you could learn about one another. It had to look real in public after all, Hawks wanted people off his back.

         Although, the last night the two of you had spent together after the bar had certainly been real. It had also left you so sore you could barely walk the next day, but that was another story for another day.

         The two of you sit down in one of the further rows, but not in the back. You have a good view of the screen; you notice as you sit down with Hawks.  You look over to him, and see that carefully guarded neutral expression on his face again. It’s almost as if there’s a mask he has under the skin of his face, that snaps back into place whenever it falters for a little, or he actually shows something of his true thoughts.

         It was almost eerie how well he did it, how second nature it seemed to him. No wonder the press couldn’t get shit on him, you thought, he’s not exactly an open book to read, and he’s actively trying to make it harder for people. You wondered if it was just because he preferred his privacy or if he had a really big secret that he felt he needed to keep.

         That was almost amusing, thinking the reason Hawks was so mysterious is some large secret that there was pressure on him to keep.

         The opening previews shook you out of your thoughts, seeing one for a book to movie adaptation that was coming out soon and you were super pumped to see. It had your favourite director working on it, and they said they’d worked closely with the author during the script writing process you and were really hopeful that it would turn out well.

         You looked to Hawks to whisper this to him in excitement and he leans over so you could whisper it so as to not disturb the people around you. When you’re done, he turns to whisper back in your ear, “Guess we’ll be back at the movies soon then.” He watches your face become a bright smile, a little heat in your face from excitement and a little embarrassment as he was giving you his full attention as you fangirled a bit.

         The movie was actually pretty decent, you thought during the middle of it. The acting carried the script though, and they were lucky at how much chemistry there was between the actors given most of them hadn’t done movies with each other before. A little way after that, Hawks leaned back in his chair, actually more relaxed than you’d ever seen him before, as he brought his arm back around you. You rolled your eyes at the little cliché he’d performed, but still found it sweet. You could feel the warmth he gave off and it made you feel comfortable and safe.

         After the movie, the two of you parted ways, but not before he gave you a sweet kiss on the cheek, and the promise to see you soon.

         “I’m going to be really busy the next few weeks, so it might be a little while before we can do something like this again.” He warned, “Things are really picking up with criminal activity and such.”

         “If you were going to be so busy you should be at home resting,” you scold, and then your eyes widen in shock at what you’d just blurted out. “I, uh- I mean…” you try to recover but Hawks was laughing hard.

         “Trying to get rid of me so soon? I thought the date was pretty fun, myself.” He teases, seeing what you’ll do next.

         “It was! Just um-, you’ve got to be safe out there and stuff. So, you should get your rest, I would understand if you had to cancel because of that.” You finish a little lamely.

         “That’s very sweet, Y/N, it really is. But honestly? Doing something like this is way more of a recharge for me. Makes me relax a little bit. So, thank you for the nice date. That is if you’ll have me?” he cocks an eyebrow with a crooked smile.

         “Of course, now go get some sleep, bird brain.” He chuckles, and with a wave he’s off, streaking through the air. You’re hit with a bit of a gust of wind, but seeing him fly up close? Totally worth it.

         You turn around and start walking to the bus stop that’ll take you back home, it had been quite a good date and you were in high spirits.

         You could see this whole arrangement working out quite well for you, if that first date was anything to go by.

           The fourth date was the one that he really started to show you what actually lay beneath the mask that he put on all the time. The two of you had been texting over a few weeks, and because he was so busy, a couple short get togethers happened, but this was the first time he had a whole day off for a long time.

         The topics the two of you had been texting about varied to asking simple questions about what kind of tea was your favourite, to what you thought would happen to you after you died. That had been a weird night, but you saw the next day it had been because Hawks had been on patrol and had been unable to completely save people from a villain. It had been one person out of hundreds, but you could feel his guilt through the screen.

         Among the lighter topics though, you found out that Hawks hadn’t really ever learned how to cook or bake. He said that he never learned from anyone, so he mostly did takeout and easy to make meals. You decided it would be fun to teach him how to bake, there were a few sweet treats that were easy enough to do. Certainly, he’d be able to handle it, you thought, especially since he made so many other difficult things look easy.

         Hawks, in fact, could not handle it, you’d later find out.

         The doorbell rings, and you take off your apron that you’d been wearing to get the baking started so that it wouldn’t take as long. There was still a fair amount of work to do, and the icing had to be made. You’re really hoping he enjoys it, it’s a new idea and you’re a little nervous.

You greet him and take his coat to hang it up as he takes off his shoes, he’s wearing cargo pants and unmatching socks, one pink and the other grey, along with a black t-shirt. You let him look around a bit before directing him to the kitchen a little nervously.

“Um, so I was thinking because you said you’d never really baked before that we could try and make a little something?” you’re fiddling with the hem of your shirt as he grabs your hands to stop you from doing that.

“That sounds like a really fun idea, Y/N. It’s really cute.” He gives you a quick smile as you smile at the praise. “Now. What are we making Chef?”

You giggle a bit at that. “I was thinking a carrot cake with some buttercream icing.”

“Well that doesn’t sound easy.” You shush him.

“It is! And I’ve already done some of it, so we can eat it sooner.”

He looks unconvinced. “I don’t know if I can handle this.”

“It’s baking,” you scoff. “You save people for a living, I’m pretty sure you can handle some baking.”

Famous last words, the start wasn’t to bad, Hawks fallowing your instructions carefully. It was when he got confident that he first fucked it up.

“So, now all you have to do is whip this with the blender for a few minutes around the bowl. When it starts getting a thicker consistency let me know, because that’s when you have to hand do it.” You’d decided on cinnamon rolls with a nice smooth icing on top that would become a glaze.

“Got it,” he chirps, putting the metal parts of the hand mixer in the bowl before starting it up and putting to medium high like you’d instructed him to do. “Maybe you were right, sweets, this isn’t too bad.”

“See? Even a bird brain like you can get it!” you laugh.

And then it happened.

After you said that to him, he turned around to give you a playful spank on the ass, forgetting he’d been holding the bowl on the counter in place with his hand. At the same time, he lifted the hand holding the mixer.

You both let out a sharp cry of surprise, you from getting slapped and both of you from the loud crash and the bowl goes flying and the icing gets flung everywhere. You look at him slack-jawed as he frantically turns off the hand mixer and gives you a sheepish look.

“Oops?” he says with a nervous smile.

“Oh. My god.” You get out before you start laughing so hard you’re keeled over, your stomach starting to hurt. “What the fuck Hawks? Hahah! How did you manage to get the bowl to fly that far!”

He scratches his hair and laughs along with you. “I’m actually really unsure, I honestly thought that I was going to get through this without messing it up. Sorry I ruined the icing, Y/N.”

You wave your hand. “It’s fine, cinnamon rolls are still good without the toppings.”

“Hold up.” You turn over and he has a calculating look on his face. “Is this why you did most of the mixing before I got here.”

“Noooooo…… of course not.” You say unconvincingly, knowing he already knows the answer.

“You’re so mean to me,” he pouts, sticking out his bottom lip like a child.

“Hey, but now we can still eat the cinnamon roles! So that’s a good thing.” You say brightly, swiping a bit of the icing with your finger and popping it in your mouth. He looks down at you and for once his eyes crinkle with a genuine smile and your heart skips a beat. He’s absolutely stunning, you think.

“Uh, let’s get – let’s get this all cleaned up, alright?” you get out turning yourself around to distract your thoughts from him. And his eyes, when they crinkle, and oh my god he’s such a cutie, what the fuck?

You somehow manage to avoid acting like a fool for the remainder of the time while the two of you clean up, trading words and jokes with one another, the conversation flowing like a lazy stream.

When they were done you squealed out in excitement and grabbed some mitts to take out the pan but as soon as you open the oven door, some feathers zip in to grab it. You look over at him and he gives you an innocent smile.

“Wouldn’t want you to accidentally drop them.” You scowl.

“I’m not the one who made a mess of the whole kitchen, you dork.”

“Fair enough, where do I put these?”

“Just put the tray on the pads in the dining room, I’m going to make some tea.”

“Alright.”

Once the water is heated, you grab a few different packets to see what he wants, and make your way over to the table with him. You gesture at the tea packets, and he takes the Camomile tea and you open the kettle to let him drop it in.

“Now we just have to wait for the tea to steep and the rolls to cool down! Not too bad if I do say so myself.” You tell him happily. It had been really fun watching him do something so carefree, he seemed more relaxed than normal.

“It was really fun Y/N.” he said with what you thought genuine sincerity. “I never got to really do this before, and it was a lot different than I thought it would be baking with someone.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it Hawks!”

“Uh, you could call me Takami? That’s my family name. Keigo Takami.” He says, stumbling over it a bit, as if the words were trying to rush themselves out of his mouth.

You pour out the tea into the cups you have, and you watch him dive into the rolls, face lit up. He really likes his sweets, and he says how good they are and how he was so amazed he’d had a part in making them.

“Most of the stuff I try to cook either tastes bland, gross, or its burnt.” He mentions offhandedly.

You look at him closely. “Seriously? I’m going to have to teach you how to cook so you can actually get some healthy food into you aren’t I?”

“You don’t have to do that!”

“Yes, I do.” He doesn’t argue with you, knowing that the battle is lost, and accepts it with a sigh.

The two of you finish the night by watching a movie, which leads to something, which leads to something else… It was a pretty awesome date night you think as you drift off to sleep.

           Although doing ‘couple-like’ things in public, you found the two of you were growing closer as friends, at least, outside of any bedrooms. There was something free and liberating about being a friend (with benefits) to Keigo, and you got to glimpse the tiny parts of his life that had physical forms, whether it be photos, or actions or stories.

         The more you learned though, the more you wanted to know more about him, to understand him and be there for him.

         You saw how lonely he actually was, he really wasn’t joking when he’d said that to you on the first night the two of you had seen each other in person. How his life when he wasn’t being the Number Two Hero was empty as if he didn’t really know what to do with it, as if he were lost and didn’t really know himself either.

         The only picture he had of people in his house was one with him, and a middle-aged woman with weary eyes that must’ve been his mother. The photo was a little yellowed, and a little crumpled, but the frame was simple wood with intricate carvings on the side. There was a wooden flower beside it.

         What had happened to him? To his family?

         Sometimes when you called him Keigo as you entered a room and he wasn’t facing you; he would shudder as if someone had a knife pressed to his throat, and there was nothing that he could do about it. Or when sometimes he would dose off and mumble in his sleep for someone to help him, he promises he’d do better next time… You always tried to wake him up gently when that happened, and he’d thank you and then shut down any attempts to talk about it. Every time. Not a single word.

         So, you let it be.

         Obviously, he didn’t know how to not be alone, and it stung you to the very core that nobody else was really there for him.

         Everyone needs a friend, and you were happy to be that friend for him.

           You realized the predicament you were in suddenly one day as you were going into your regular café for your morning coffee, ordering one for yourself and one for the winged hero who you planned to spend some time before patrol with. You didn’t even second guess ordering his coffee just as he liked it, excited to see the smile on his face when you’d give it to him. He’d still get surprised by the little gestures you’d do to show him that you cared, that it wasn’t just a game for you, that you were his friend.

         You hadn’t realized how rare it was to get a genuine smile from him, but you were willing to do so much just to see it. Then it hit you. You wouldn’t go to these lengths for any friend, Keigo was special to you in a way that the other’s in your life weren’t. You think you know what that means, and it terrifies you.

         You knew he didn’t do the whole relationship aspect, he’d said as much, and everything in his life had backed that up as well.

         The barista has to call you a couple times for you to snap you out of your mild panicked thoughts, looking a little annoyed. You quickly apologize, shoving your feelings down and grabbing the coffees hastily as you make your way to the place where he’d be meeting you. You were going to be a couple minutes late, which always made you flustered, and on top of that you were freaking out about trying to keep those emotions you’d buried down there.

         They were not going to see the light of day, you promised yourself that. Maybe you could cram them down so far deep that they’d disappear.

         Ha. As if. You knew it wasn’t going to be that easy, but that was a later problem that you weren’t prepared to deal with right now.

         When you get there, a smile does light up his face as he thanks you, relishing the coffee. The two of you start walking down the street, Hawks waving at people who yell at him, putting on that fake-smile-that-looks-real for people who ask him to join them in a picture, or sign something for them.

         He did it all with patience, but through the cracks you could see the weariness dripping through. The way he put it was that he wanted to do as little work as possible. You assume that’s for this part of the hero business as well.

         “Well, thank you for your support! I’ll be sure to do my best, don’t worry.” He says to a little boy, bending down and flicking his hat, which gets a smile and a giggle from the kid. “Thank you all for your support!” he says loudly as he stands up, and people cheer before easily making their way away from him, the dismissal clear.

         The two of you sip your coffee as you walk down the street. You said you’d go for a quick walk around the city with him before he has to clock in for patrol. While you’re walking, he laces his fingers with yours.

         “You don’t mind, do you?” he mutters under his breath. Your pulse is fluttering but you shake your head no and sip on your coffee. “Good, it’s getting chilly.”

         After you drop him off you can’t help but look at your hand and smile, giggling to yourself a bit as you squeeze your hand. His hand had been so smooth compared to what you thought it would be like, but then again, he didn’t really fight with his fists and he wore gloves. It had felt so good though, the weight of his hand in yours.

           After you noticed how you felt about Keigo though, it became harder and harder to try and ignore the feelings that seemed to bubble up whenever the two of you would talk or text or hang out. Little pangs of excitement would ring out against your will whenever the chime of the ringtone you’d set for him would sound.

         You perk up a little as once again it alerts, going over to read what he sent you.

Keigo: gonna have to be away a little more in the next few weeks -_-

Y/N: aww why :(

Keigo: secret stuff shhhhhh. I gotta go check out some weird villain movement

Y/N: stay safe ok?

Keigo: don’t worry, they won’t catch me im too fast :P

Y/N: srsly if you die ill kill you >:(

           You don’t hear from it at all in the next few weeks, and you didn’t realize how much the two of you had been in contact with, but your days felt strangely empty without the noise that he made so often.

         You missed him, and more than that, you were worried about him so much. Since when did top heroes go on secret assignments? Wasn’t that stuff for the underground heroes to take care of? Why did he sound so calm about it?

         The questions whirled around in your head, day in and day out. The couple of weeks pass in a daze for you, everything seeming out of wack in your life. Part of you was angry at yourself for being so distracted by him, and the other part was busy screaming all the worst-case scenarios that could happen to him. You have nightmares about him injured and bleeding, eyes lifeless. You check your phone at least a few times whenever you can, just seeing if maybe he’s sent a text to you.

         You’ve sent him a few messages here and there, small things like “I hope you’re doing ok!”, or “I miss you”, or “I’m really hoping you’re safe.”

         In the middle of the third week, you hear that chime and you jump up, excited. It’s a short message, but he must be exhausted from his mission, he was away for so long. He asked if you could go over to his apartment sometime soon. Said he needed to talk to you and stuff. His text was short and to the point, he seemed nervous about something.

         Some of the worries had disappeared at the ringing noise came creeping back at that, but you responded that you would whenever you were both free. He said that he’d be off of work for a little while, which was concerning, so you were going over tomorrow. You settled in for a rough night.

           What were you supposed to bring to someone’s house when they had been tossed into secret mission to track down some dangerous villains and were most likely injured? There wasn’t a handguide on that unfortunately, but you did know that he loved one of the soups you had made one time. So, you made some in the morning when you got up, put it in a container and on your way to his apartment for lunch.

         Hopefully that would be acceptable, even though you knew Keigo didn’t really care that much about pomp and other gifts. You think he was grateful to have some company, he loved being on the move and sitting still for a long time would be a special type of hell.

         So, you wanted to do something nice for him.

         In all honesty, you didn’t think it would be that bad when he opened the door with a bruised and cut face, as well as an arm sling with his ribs all bandaged up.

         “Oh my god!” you screamed, your free hands flying up to your face. “What the hell happened to you!” he shushes you and pulls you into the apartment.

         “Not so loud! It’s not public!” he chastises you.

         “Oh, right sorry. I’m just – Keigo, what happened to you? You disappear for almost three full weeks and you come back looking as if someone used you as a punching bag.”

         “Surprisingly enough, that metaphor is rather accurate.” You feel your eyes bugging out of your head and he sees that. “Hey! Don’t worry, this isn’t the worse I’ve been beaten up- Oh god that’s probably not comforting.”

         “No, it isn’t! Is there anything you can tell me?” you plead.

         He shakes his head sadly, pretending to zip up his lips and lock them. “But I can tell you that I’ll be back to normal in about a week or so. I could also tell you about the people I met that weren’t y’know, villains. And you brought soup! You’re the best dove.” You blush a little at the new nickname, but you did notice that the nervousness he’d had when he’d been texting with was definitely still there and it put you off a little bit.

         The two of you ate, the only sounds coming from eating, and the brief comments that Keigo was giving about where he’d been. You nodded in interest, interjecting every once and a while to ask a question for detail.

         After the meal, the two of you sat down together in silence until Keigo cleared his throat.

         “Can I talk to you about something more serious?” You nodded, here came what he’d been stressing about since last night. “God, ok this is harder than I thought for some reason.” He gives a dry chuckle. You stay silent. “Um, I think we’re going to have to take a break from the whole ‘side benefits’ we got going along, you okay with that, dove?” ah. So, this was it. You could feel your heartbeat in your ears. But at least you knew what, now you wanted to hear the why.

         But Keigo was fickle, he didn’t like being backed into a corner. If you would’ve directly asked, you’d get no answer that would satisfy you. So you sit their with your heart falling out of your chest.

         “I mean, if that’s what you want.” You say as neutrally as possible, trying to hide the hurt from your features. It didn’t work as well as you planned based on Keigo’s scowl.

         “You’ve got to talk to me, what about that makes you upset?”

         “It’s nothing, I’ll get over it. I knew this wouldn’t last forever.” You mutter, trying to shrug him off. At least this way you could get over him, maybe.

         “I did say no guarantees at the beginning,” he frowns. It felt like he was rubbing it into your face, and it fucking stung like a cut being washed with rubbing alcohol. “I told you that I’m not good with this whole interpersonal thing.”

         “Yeah, I fucking know that!” each word was like a sting, and your voice echoes in the empty apartment. “Can you at least tell me why.” You hate that your voice cracks on that last sentence.

“There’s this someone I’ve been talking too, when I was out there. A little rough around the edges, but really fucking amazing. I was trying to slip into their friend group you know? Turns out we felt the same way.”

         You feel your heart drop out of your chest and into your stomach. “Wow, Keigo! That’s amazing, I’m so happy for you!” you hear yourself say. The words ring hollow, but he’s so wrapped up in his excitement that for once, he doesn’t notice.

         “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before,” he enthuses, impassioned. “It’s like a totally different wavelength you know.” His feathers were doing this cute little ruffling, and your heart ached. You had to keep your hand back from going to smooth them. Some nights, when the two of you were just hanging out and relaxing, he’d let you smooth them out. He said it felt good, and the texture always made you feel calm.

         You needed some of that calm right now.

         “I’m glad you found someone then.” And you really were, you knew how alone he was. You were happy he found someone he liked. You just wish it had been you.

           You think it was some type of torture, watching Keigo fall in love with someone else. The way he’d talk with his eyes lighting up, the way that he’d do that thing where his feathers would ruffle when he’d think of them with a dopey smile on his face when he thinks you’re too occupied to pay attention to him.

         It fucking killed you when it happens, although you made no effort to break away from him. You couldn’t. You knew that he needed you there, he’d said as much with his small actions, the way he thanked you every time you spent time with him.

         You wondered what you had done to deserve this.

           Eventually, it was too much for you too handle, when he’d started leaving the city more often to go visit them, you started making excuses for why you didn’t have as much time for him in the few weeks.

         “Works really busy this week sorry.”

         “Oh, I’m sick, and I wouldn’t want you to catch it”

         “I’m sorry I’m really tired, I can’t hang out today.

You couldn’t get over him, and you couldn’t tell him either. It seems you could do nothing but ache while he prospered.

It was hard, making distance. You hadn’t realized how close the two of you had gotten, and you hadn’t realized that you had needed him as much as he needed you.

         The phone rings and you see the caller.

         Of course, it’s him. It seems no matter how you try to distance yourself you can’t really get away from him. It always seems like you’re in his wingspan. Always in his reach.

         You pick up the phone, “Hey Keigo! What’s up.”

           You were a fucking fool. Keigo might’ve been the one with the wings, but you’d flown too close to the sun that you’d wanted to see and learn about. The sun that you’d wanted to bask in the warmth in and claim as your own.

         You’d forgotten one of the first things that he’d texted you.

         It hurt so bad.

         You were such an idiot.

           At first when Keigo said he’d been dumped a few months later; you didn’t believe him. Who the fuck would tell Hawks that he wasn’t good enough for them?

         “Ha-ha, very funny joke Keigo.” You say sarcastically. “Don’t stand there out in the rain, idiot.” You gesture for him to come inside.

         He makes his way over the doorstep, eyes unfocused as if he hadn’t even noticed the fact that it was raining. He wordlessly hands you his phone, and you gasp at the text that he’d been sent.

         They said he couldn’t be trusted, that they didn’t want to work to get him to open himself up, that even he wasn’t worth the amount of effort they’d need to use in order to actually get to know him.

         “Still don’t believe me?” His voice cracks on the last word, as he takes a deep breath to compose himself.

         “Fuck, Keigo. I’m so sorry. I didn’t- I’m so sorry.” You bring him in, sit him down and go grab him a towel with some old clothes one of your exes had left in your home when you’d broken up.

         You hand it to him and tell him to shower if he wants to, but at least put some dry clothes on. He listlessly follows your instructions, and you’ve never seen him look so dull. It scared you. While he’s busy though – you vaguely hear your shower in the background get turned on – as you put some tea on. Chamomile, his first choice all those months ago. It was his comfort tea. You also slipped into your room to grab the softest blanket you had.

         You waited about half an hour for him, so you turned on the gas fireplace in the room, warming yourself and staring into the flames as you waited.

         Who would say something so terrible?

         You’d never met his partner, Keigo was secretive at the best of times, but when it came to people, he was especially paranoid. You knew it was because he��d amassed enemies in his years as a pro, but sometimes it was frustrating to deal with.

         However, they must have been truly awful to say something like that.

         You wonder if they would’ve said that stuff if they’d seen the empty apartment, bare of most things that gave a house a character. The lone photo which looked to be at least a decade, maybe closer to two, years old.

         You wonder if they had seen past the mask too, and if that had scared them. Or maybe they hadn’t even noticed it in the first place given the wording of the final text. You knew the pain Keigo was going through, you lived through it every. Single. Day.

         You hated seeing it, but a small selfish part of you celebrated the fact that you had a chance again.

         Pathetic.

         You place your head in your hands, trying to clean your thoughts. You needed to be here for him again, and you were going to be.

         When he walks into the room, he notices you and slumps down into the couch, his eyes red, and his jaw clenched.

         But he wasn’t crying, and it didn’t look like he had either. The rest of his face would be messed up and red if that were the case.

         “You can let it out, Keigo.” You put a hand on his arm and rubbed comforting circles into his back, trying to ease him through it. “You don’t have to keep everything bottled up inside.”

         He laughs bitterly at that, and you’re taken aback. “Yeah, actually, I do. But I appreciate the sentiment.”

         “Alright. Then we can just rest, and have some tea, maybe put on some calming music. Does that sound good to you?”

         He nods, he can’t look up at you though. “Thanks, Y/N.”

         “No problem, Keigo. Be right back.”

         When you do come back, he’s just laying there, staring blankly in front of him. He looks lost and confused.

         “Have you ever felt like this,” he asks in a soft voice. A surge of anger hits you, after all this time he still hasn’t noticed. But you push it down and clear your throat instead.

         “Yeah. I’ve felt like that a lot in my life.”

         “I’m sorry.” He states simply. “It’s awful.”

         “Yeah,” you agree.

         The rest of the night the two of you sit quietly, sipping tea and listening to music. At some point the two of you end up sleeping on one another.

           The weeks pass, and Keigo starts to recover, as that starts to happen, the two of you start to slip back into your previous relationship. You know it’s a mistake, but you don’t stop it. You almost encourage it, because it feels good. It feels like he actually wants you and you can believe it for a few moments before it comes crashing down around you. You know you’re a rebound, even if Keigo himself doesn’t realize that’s what he’s doing.

         So, there he is again, using you as a way to fill his life up to make up for the something he can’t have. Coping with his issues by having someone he could distract himself with, that he trusted and knew cared about his wellbeing.

         You wish you could say you hated it. But then you’d be a liar.

         Because you would take any of the time that he was willing to give to you. You were in deep, and you knew that, just wished you would have a way that you could stop it, rather than just going along for the ride, and hoping that he didn’t completely destroy your heart.

         Although that possibility seemed to be more and more likely these days.

           One day, you realize that you can’t do this anymore.

         One day, you think that you’re not going to allow yourself to do this to yourself or him anymore.

One day you decide that you have to take a full step back. No half done measures this time, the next time he called, you weren’t answering, and you weren’t listening. Maybe taking a complete break from the winged hero would somehow allow you to get over your feelings for him. Maybe the separation would do you some good, you could try and meet some new people, hang out with older friends.

         You have a plan, a way to bring it up to him, to say that you can’t do the whole song and dance with him anymore, you can’t play around because it’s messing with your head. You plan on telling him that you just need some space to rest and recover, and that you’ll be fine in a little while.

         It doesn’t happen that way.

         You’re in his apartment and you’re both eating some takeout, you’ve been on edge the entire night, and of course Keigo notices. He tries to tell you a few happy stories he’s seen that day, tries to give you space to relax. He leans in to kiss you and you panic.

         You jump up and say “I have to leave!” in a really panicked voice.

         “Woah hey, what the fuck’s going on?” He stands up, walking after you.

         “I just, I had a way to tell you- and I’m not ready and fuck I wish I didn’t have to say this but I just can’t do it!” You’re rambling, you know that, but you can’t seem to get your thoughts together, they’re bouncing around your head, refusing to slow down so you can’t catch them, and you’re sitting there panicking.

         “You need to talk to me,” he shouts, breaking you out of your daze.

         “I can’t do this anymore!” you cry out, all the bottled pain spilling up and gushing out. You can’t stop it, and you keep going. “I fell for you in week three, Keigo. WEEK THREE of our arrangement. And guess what! I still fucking love you, you absolute moron! You didn’t notice SHIT, and I didn’t say anything because I knew you didn’t feel the same way, but I knew you needed someone. And sometimes I fucking wish I didn’t, that I spoke up for myself and said something sooner because it’s brought me nothing but heartbreak after heartbreak, and so much insecurity!”

         He looks at you shocked. “Wait… you, but?”

         You laugh, a little hysterically, all the emotions bubbling over. There’s a strange sense of relief. It’s all out in the open now. “Fucking tell the press! I finally found the way to make the Hawks absolutely speechless!”

         “Wait, hold up, you need to slow down. I’m trying to understand what’s going on, and you aren’t exactly making this easier.” His eyes are wide, you’ve never seen him so completely and utterly lost. That was the final straw for you, and you start sobbing, tears streaming down your face as you try to keep your wails of pain inside.

         You put yourself together in silence, his sharp eyes trained on you, you can feel it. Your sobs and sniffles grow less and less frequent as you gain control.

         “I need space Keigo. I need to have space so I can get over you properly, and I couldn’t do it before, I thought I could! I just need to sort everything out, please.” You’re pleading with him, your voice drained and emotionless. “Just, don’t contact me please. Let me” You walk away before he can even answer, leaving him dumbfounded.

         He grabs your arm before you reach the door, a little rougher than he usually is. “You don’t get to say all these things without even giving me a chance to respond!” His usually calm exterior is flustered, a little unhinged with panic and anger.

         “I can! I told you how I feel! Nothing you say will be able to change how I feel right now Keigo! Nothing!” you feel your heart ripping to shreds as you see, for the first time in your one on one time in months, the mask returning as he looks it over too.

         “Got it.” He says short and clipped off. “Thanks for just cutting me off like everyone else did. Get the fuck out of my apartment.”

         You go, quietly, unable to look him in the eye. The door slams behind you, with an ominous thud.

           The first time you gather up the courage to call him again to apologize, he doesn’t pick up. You expected that. You were hoping for that because you weren’t sure if you had the strength to say it to him.

         You tell him you’re sorry. You tell him you know you made mistakes, that you knew you didn’t communicate right and you should’ve trusted him with that. You tell him you miss him because you do. He’d wormed his way into the cracks in your heart that he’d had a part in making.

         You tell him you want to have a place in his life, and that he still has a place in yours, but you’re not ready yet.

         You don’t know if he got it until he calls you back. He leaves a message for you this time as you were in the shower when it rang.

         He tells you he understands now, even though it hurt like hell. He says he’s going to give you space, but would still leave you messages every once in a while. He says that of course you’re going to have a place in his life. He says that you’re the only person in a long time that had even bothered to get to see what was underneath his persona. He says that when you’re ready, to either call him back, or answer one of his calls.

         So that’s how it happens. On some good days and some bad days, Keigo calls you. You listen to every single one, multiple times. Your feelings don’t die down though. You don’t know what else you can do but wait. The sad messages tear at your heart, but you know you can’t be there for him right now properly.

         One of them you can’t help but hear and think that you need to call him, need to reach out to him. He’d sounded desperate in a way you hadn’t heard from him before and it chilled you down to the bone.

         But you don’t. You’re too scared of what you’ll do or say.

         On one of the days where you can’t sleep, you sit and stare at your ceiling, thinking about nothing much. Idle thoughts about the project you were working on, what you had to stock up on the next time you went shopping, the puzzle that you’d gotten stuck on in the current level of your video game.

         That’s when the ringing broke out on your bedside table. That ringtone. You still loved him, and he never called this late. You picked up the phone.

         “It’s two am, I know that, but I need you Y/N…”

         “Hawks? What’s going on. Are you ok?”

         He laughs loudly, “Fuck, no. Can I come over?” He almost manages to hide the waver in his voice.

         You sigh, putting a hand to your temple. “I’m sorry, but you can’t come to me anymore, you know that.” You say it softly.

         “You picked up.”

         “I did.”

         “You still love me.”

         “Goddamn it Keigo, yes! Is that what you really wanted to hear right now at two in the morning?”

         His tone switches to serious. “No. That’s not it at all. Please. It’s important.”

         “I could just hang up.”

         “You won’t.”

         You let out a stream of curses that would make a sailor blush.

         “Fine.” You give in with a groan and the starting of a stress headache. “I’m leaving the door unlocked for 10 minutes. That’s all you have.”

         “That’s way more than I need.” You hear the click of the receiver tone and you move your ass out of bed, going to go unlock the door. There you wait in your pjs, your arms crossed glaring at the door and daring it to open.

         Before the 10 minutes is up, it defies you and clicks open, and in he comes.

         “Hey.” He just looks at you, and he looks exhausted. “Thanks for listening.”

         You resist the urge to just run up to him and take him into your arms. He’d feel so good to cuddle. Instead you say in a wary voice; “What do you want Keigo, it’s late and I’m tired.”

         “I know,” he whispers. “I am too, but.” He swallows hard. “I needed to see you before. Before everything gets fucked up.”

         “What the hell are you talking about? And close the door it’s cold outside.” He follows your instructions without complaint and quietly.

         “You’re going to want to be sitting down for this,” he warns.

         You can see he’s not playing around, so you heed him and sit on the couch, and he sits on the chair, dragging it over so he’s opposite you.

         “First off. An explanation of what I mean.” You gesture at him to carry on. “Remember those villains I had to check up on? Well, they were actually mobilizing an attack on the Hero Commission HQ which is in the city.”

         “No way, seriously?” you can’t believe that they would get that bold so soon. It was insane, and yet, you believed it.

         “Well yeah. I came by to warn you, because there’s going to be so much chaos, and in that chaos, it’s more likely for you to either die or get hurt.” Your hands found their way to your hair, brushing through it nervously. “Hey, hey, listen Y/N” he goes to hold your shoulder’s and looks you in the eye. “The heroes have been preparing for a few months now, taking out some of the villains they can. Everyone’s going to have a much better chance of survival. But staying inside and not opening to door for anyone? That’s going to keep you safest. Understand?” You nod.

         Something niggled at the back of your mind though. “You said first thing.”

         “Yeah…”

         “Well? Are you going to tell me?”

         “You’re going to slap me.”

         “Well that’s not a fucking good sign.”

         He rubs the back of his neck. “Well, I figured out why you’d shocked me so much with what you’d said. When we went our separate ways for a little while.”

         You felt your stomach sink. This couldn’t be good, why did he have to bring that up now. “Yeah?”

         “I didn’t trust my partner with anything that I’d shown you. You were the only person I’ve opened up too since… well a long time let’s put it like that. I haven’t really actually let myself feel things for a while, so I misunderstood them. I thought they were hot; I liked the look and the way they talked. I wasn’t falling love with them. I was in love with you the whole time and I didn’t realize it.” You felt like your heart stopped beating.

         “Keigo?”

         “Yes?”

         “You didn’t think to actually say that in one of your fucking messages?”

         “I didn’t think you were ready to hear it.”

         “I mean maybe not, but it would’ve saved a lot of headache!”

         “I’m sorry.” He says, “I’m learning, but I’m trying my best if you’ll take me?”

         “Of course, I will you stupid bird. It’s going to take work, but I know where I went wrong.”

         “Me too. I believe in us. Heh, us. I like the sound of that.” He has a goofy smile on his face.

         “Oh my god you’re such a dork.” You lean up to press a light kiss on his lips, which he eagerly responds too. “You look exhausted though. Let’s get you into bed, so you can protect the city hero.”

         “Sounds amazing to me.” He follows you into the room, stripping down and snuggling you.

         “I’m likely going to be gone by the time you wake up, y’know?”

         You sigh. “You better not die on me or I’ll kill you.”

         “For you? I’ll stay as safe as possible.”

         “Good.”

           The next day, everything was in chaos, just like Keigo had said it would be. You didn’t even need to leave your house to know that. You saw it on your phone screen as you stayed hidden in your closet, to terrified to move or do anything else. A couple buildings had fallen near you, but luckily your building had stayed safe.

         You don’t remember much else about that day. Fear. Praying that the people you cared about would be safe. Darkness. The sounds of massive explosions and destruction.

         Terrible.

           There were massive body counts of all different people, with varying quirks, lives, beliefs and goals. The damage was catastrophic. You almost couldn’t believe that it had been better than what would’ve happened if there wasn’t early intel and missions.

         You noticed though, that everyone was treated the same in death. Hero, civilian, villain, vigilante, all of them were buried properly, paid for by the Commission themselves. Some of the villains had escaped, there were lots more dead hero students than people wanted to admit, and everyone was more beaten down and broken than before.

         But…

         Nobody had seen or heard anything about Hawks though. It was as if he’d simply vanished into thin air, and the only thing that kept you sane? They hadn’t found his body.

         What about that cremation guy? The traitorous voice in your head spoke out. You told it to fuck off.

         Hawks, Keigo, was not dead. He couldn’t be. You’d finally reached an understanding!

         You refused to allow the possibility in your mind.

           It was a week later when you finally got some news. There was a call from the hospital, and you immediately, you picked up.

         “Is this Y/N Y/LN?”

         “Yes,” you practically shout. “Yes, I am.” You say a bit softer.

         “I’m calling about a Keigo Takami? Do you know this man?”

         “Yes, yes, I do, please is he alive?” you can’t keep the desperation from your voice.

         There’s a pause. “…Yes. He is alive. They’re trying to test to see what the extent of the damage is. You were the only other person other than his mother to be on his emergency contact list, yet you have no relation to him, were you aware of this?”

         “Yes,” the lie comes easily, despite the surprise bubbling up.

         He gives you the address and you promise to be there as soon as you can. You can deal with this, you think, he’s alive and so the two of you can work on it and fix it together like you’d planned.

         Except you couldn’t.

         Little to no brain function, they said. Halfway done the process to become a host body for a new nomu, they said. How were you supposed to fix everything together if Keigo was right there, but also completely gone?

         You collapsed into the chair beside his bed, looking over at him. The man you’d loved for over half a year. The doctors went silent, all of them leaving except for one, who stood silently. You reached out and held his hand in yours. Still softer and smoother than what a pro hero’s hand should be like. Still warm, like the first time you’d held it. You could even feel his pulse.

         It was almost funny; you were finished before the two of you even got started. You couldn’t even say that the two of you had ever truly been together, but that’s what made it hurt more, you think. Nobody would believe you, a random nobody? Dating the number two pro hero? Yeah what an attention whore.

         You sat there, tears building in your eyes, and spilling out

         “Keigo, please just give me one more message?” you whisper, crying harder now. “I’ll be waiting for it, so you better call me when you’re ready, because I’ll be waiting for you.”

[ssamie]

eight. SAKUSA KIYOOMI

suna rintaro x fem! mitsuri reader

(kny x hq)

warnings: spelling mistakes,  3k+ words, italicized words/ sentences are her thoughts, mitsuri’s hair+eye color was used.

gen masterlist.      sakura mochi.

"okay, my friend'll be here any time soon" atsumu told her "now what did we practice?" atsumu cooed at her

she blankly smiled and reluctantly waved her hand. "h-hello. my name is y/n l/n and i have sanitized more than thrice today.." she mumbled in embarrassment

"what did you say?!" atsumu yelled with a look of confusion written on his face "i can't hear ya!"

suna rolled his eyes at him. "well maybe you'd be able to if you weren't standing ten feet away from each other" he said with a sigh. suna was right. they were indeed standing ten feet away from each other and it was quite ridiculous, in her opinion but atsumu was hell bent on getting his friend to like her, so he went with extreme measures. 

"tsumu-kun.. i don't think he'll mind if i don't wear a mask or gloves" she said with a huff "its getting so hot here, i might just disgust him if i start sweating more" she sighed 

atsumu pouted as she handed him the mask and gloves "you don't understand! omi-omi will never like you if that happens!" he whined "why would you care if he likes her or not" osamu scowled as he threw a volleyball to the back of atsumu's head 

"well" the blond smirked "my dear omi-omi has been single for so long!" he exclaimed dramatically "so me being the great friend that i am" he smiled pridefully "i decided to set these two up!" 

"no." osamu replied 

"eh? why not??" atsumu blinked dumbly in response "yer not setting them up for multiple reasons" osamu said "one is, no. just no." 

"two.. is because im more invested on setting her up with.. him.." osamu whispered as he slyly nodded towards suna. atsumu scrunched his face in response "eh?? no way! he's ugly!" he whispered back 

"he's not ugly" osamu rolled his eyes "and you certainly have no room to talk. you look like a fly for fucksake" 

"hah?! the hell did ya call me?!" 

upon seeing them on the verge of fighting, she sighed and opted to exit the gym. "who even is omi-omi.." she muttered "is he really that irked with germs?" she shrugged it off and made her way to a vending machine, planning to buy a drink for herself. 

"ugh.. how do i- ew." someone muttered 

she looked up to see a tall man, glaring daggers at the vending machine, and having trouble pressing the buttons

"um.. do you need help?" she asks with a sweet smile as she gently tapped the guy on his back. she yelped as the guy flinched so hard and immediately backed away from her. 

"yes. can you get me that" he said as he pointed to a can of soda "of course!" she beamed as she followed his request. with a smile, she handed him the drink, patiently waiting for him to simply take it. 

though that never came, instead he took out a pack of tissue and presented it to her, as if waiting for her to wrap it around the can "uh.. okay.." she sweat dropped as she wrapped the can of soda in tissue paper 

"thanks" he nodded as he took a swig of the drink 

she side eyed him as he started typing on his phone. she hummed in curiosity as she took notice of the bright yellow jacket he was wearing.

"excuse me.. are you a student here?" she asked him as she finished buying her drink "i don't think i see you around so often" she said

sakusa eyed her up and down, squinting his eyes as he sipped his drink. "no." he answered"but im here to meet someone." he said as he turned around to walk away

"oh, i can help you.. only if you want." she proposed "its getting really hasty in the gym" she sighed

"gym?" sakusa questioned with a hum as he turned back to face her "what's your name?" he asked "ah, im y/n" she said "what about you? what's your name?"

"im.. sakusa kiyoomi." he spoke in a low tone

'ha.'  she blinked in response

'is this 'omi-omi'?!?'  she panicked

'oh god, im not wearing my mask! or my gloves!'   she thought to herself as she frantically searched her pockets for some hand sanitizer   'oh god i don't have it..'   she chuckled meekly to herself as she felt her soul flowing out of her body from dread

'ah, he's gonna hate me'  she sulked  'and he's so handsome too!'

'a cute guy is gonna hate me' she chanted repateatedly in her head

"are you perhaps the omi-omi tsumu-kun keeps mentioning?" she asked him with a nervous chuckle. she yelped as his face scrunched up in one of annoyance almost immediately. "sorry! i was just-" 

"you know atsumu?" he cut her off as he questioned her with an irked brow 

"um yes. i live with them at the moment, they're kind of like my host family." she explained. sakusa hummed and nodded, throwing away his now empty soda and hesitantly walking closer to her 

"nice to meet you." he said "atsumu hasn't shut up about you since you moved in with them" 

"nice to meet you as well, omi-omi - kun!" she beamed "a-ah.. sorry, should i call you sakusa instead?" she sweat dropped upon seeing the dread on his face when she called him by his nickname 

"its fine, call me what you want" sakusa shrugged as he turned on his heels and started walking away 

"i'll call you kiyoomi then!" she exclaimed with a bright smile as she jogged over to catch up with him "so, kiyoomi-kun! what do you wanna do before meeting the twins?" she asked in hopes of starting a conversation 

"i don't know.." sakusa mumbled with a grunt as he shoved his hands in his jacket pockets. she hummed in disappointment at his dry response, though lowkey freaking out in her head. 

'what to do, what to do'   she thought to herself as  she looks around the slightly packed campus 

"kiyoomi-kun, would you like to go to my secret hideout?" she said in an unnecessarily hushed tone as she gently tugged on his sleeves 

"secret hideout?" sakusa sweat dropped as she nodded eagerly, smiling like a child as she starts to pull him away "yep! im not sure how you'll feel about it, but its clean and very pretty!" she said as she looked back at him with a smile 

"if it's clean then sure" sakusa squints his eyes in suspicion as he discreetly tries to pull his arm away from her "alright! but it's outside of school grounds, so we may have to walk for a bit" she informed him as she lead him to the school gates 

"whatever" sakusa grunted 

"ah here it is!" she exclaimed excitedly as they stopped before a tall bush 

"we walked for so long to get to a bush." sakusa deadpanned as he glared down at her in annoyance "hehe, of course not, kiyoomi-kun" she chuckled as she started ruffling the bushes and squeezing her way through the leaves 

"its inside here! come on!" she said as she motioned for him to follow. sakusa merely stared at the bush and turned around to leave. 

"kiyoomi-kun, come on!" she exclaimed as she forcefully pulled him into the bush with her "oi! what the hell are you-" he cut himself off as he finally had a look around 

"is this.. wisteria?" he mumbled as he looked around the arrays of wisteria flowers adorning the path which leads to a traditional looking tea house 

"yup! it's pretty isn't it?" she hummed with a smile as she caught a few of the purple petals which were blown by the wind "yeah" sakusa nodded as he pulled down his mask to inhale the sweet and floral smell of the air 

"y/n-sama? have you come to eat?" an old woman asked as she peered at them from the tea house "oba-chan!" she squeaked out in surprise 

"w-well, not really" she said. she looked up at sakusa and asked him "unless you want to get something to go, kiyoomi-kun?" 

sakusa nodded and let her drag him towards the tea house once again "i thought this was your secret hideout" sakusa raised a brow as he watched the old woman pack some mochi in a container. she smiled nervously and avoided eye contact 

"well.. technically, this is a private teahouse everyone from the dojo goes to" she explained "but it's still a secret hideout if you think about it!" she defended "and i just wanted to sound cool and interesting so you wouldn't hate me.." she mumbled with a pained expression on her face 

sakusa sweat dropped as he watched her seemingly sulk and have a full blown conversation with herself in her head. 

"y/n-sama." the old woman called out as she presented the neatly packed mochi to her "ah, thank you so much oba-chan!!" y/n squealed in delight as she hugged the mochis to her chest

the old woman bowed before handing sakusa a small wisteria charm. "please accept this" the old woman said as she placed it on his palms

"w-what is this" sakusa asked with a grimace as he peered at the charm in disgust "its a wisteria charm filled with freshly crushed wisteria which i handpicked from the garden" the old woman responded

sakusa calmed down upon reviewing the information and sighed. he twirled the small charm in his fingers and bowed in thanks. "its a tradition for us to give new comers charms like that, kiyoomi-kun" y/n said as she pulled out one of her own

"its to ward off demons and evil spirits. it was a common practice for swordsmen from the taisho era to do so" she said with a smile

sakusa scoffed at her claims "you really believe in those stories?" he said as he pocketed the charm "of course!" she responded almost immediately with a gasp

"my ancestors were all former swordsmen and they were believed to be the ones who killed the demons" she explained to him in a lecturing manner

sakusa raised his hands in mock defeat and nodded "yeah, yeah. whatever you say" he said. she smiled in content and proceeded to drag him away once again. 

"bye, oba-chan! i'll come visit again some time soon!" she announced as she waved the lady goodbye 

"have a safe trip" the old woman replied 

as they were walking back to inarizaki, sakusa was quiet. she simply thought he wasn't in the mood to talk so she let him be. though as they were walking, she suddenly had a thought pop up into her head. 

'should i bring suna-kun to the wisteria gardens as well?'  she pondered to herself 

'ha! of course i should!'  she shook her head from her idiocy 

'the fireflies will swarm at night and we can have a picnic together under the stars and wisteria trees!' 

her mouth had almost watered from the delightful thought that was swimming through her head. sakusa looked at her worriedly as he face starts to become concerningly red. 

"are you alright?" sakusa asked wearily 

"agh, suna-kun might not want to go though.." she accidentally mumbled out loud "suna? suna rintaro?" sakusa muttered in confusion 

"you know him, kiyoomi-kun?!" she squeaked in surprise "please don't tell him!" 

"well, i don't really know what i would tell him" sakusa scratched his head in confusion "but sure" 

"im so relieved, kiyoomi-kun" she said with a sigh "tsumu made me nervous with how intimidating he made you seem" she looked up at his towering figure and oh so prominent scowl. his eyebrows were knitted as he hunches over as he walks. 

he was indeed intimidating. but in her eyes he had simply morphed into a cute little highschool boy who smiles at everyone and likes to keep things clean. 

"you're actually really nice, kiyoomi-kun!" she said with a grin as sakusa merely narrows his eyes in response "is that so?" sakusa mused as they once again entered inarizaki's gates. 

"anyways, let's go to the gym" sakusa says as he grabbed her wrist with a hint of reluctance. her eyes sparkled as she stared at his hand which was lightly gripping her wrist. 

"kiyoomi-kun, you're touching me?! do you think im clean enough?!" she asked excitedly 

"tch. well, i know you're nothing like those sweaty animals i call my 'friends' " sakusa muttered. she beamed happily and skipped after him, smiling in triumph and content as they entered inarizaki's gym 

"oh, y/n-chan! where have you bee-" atsumu cut himself off with a loud scream as he caught sight of sakusa "y-you were together?!" atsumu yelled in excitement 

"shut up" sakusa muttered as he quietly trudged over to the benches 

"who was together?" suna chimed in as he peered over atsumu's shoulder 

"kiyoomi-kun! wait for me" she said as she skipped after him, all while excitedly poking at his back to gain his attention "f-first name basis too?!" atsumu shrieked dramatically 

"first name?" suna mumbled with narrowed eyes 

"shut up and give me the mochi" sakusa grunted with a playful eye roll as he took the food from her hands 

"and they're touching?!" atsumu shrieked as he pulled at his hair, looking like he's on the verge of unconsciousness 

"they're touching?" suna mumbled in confusion and surprise 

"she's feeding him mochi?!" atsumu screamed one last time before fully falling on the floor 

"she's feeding him-" 

"okay. the two of you, for the love of god, please shut up" aran cut suna off with a tired sigh 

the two watched them from the bench as they bickered, unbotheredly munching on their snack. "oh no, samu-kun's hitting atsumu again" she mumbled in concern 

"i should go help..but i really wanna eat though.." she mumbled in a state of distress as her eyes dart between the mochi and atsumu. sakusa smirked in amusement as he watched her choose the mochi over saving atsumu from getting his body absolutely battered. 

"you know, you're not half bad, y/n" sakusa said with a chuckle as he ruffled her hair 

"eh?!" atsumu shrieked as he abruptly rose from the ground 

"ha?!" suna exclaimed with a scowl alongside atsumu as he watched sakusa lightly pat her head 

"really? im not?" she asked him with sparkling eyes, relishing in the simple compliment she had received "yeah" sakusa huffed in response as he went to pull his mask back up his face 

though, he suddenly froze as he managed to take a quick whiff of her scent which had lingered on his hand. he hesitantly bright his hand up to his nose to bask in her scent, which was a mix of cherry blossom and his favourite body wash. 

'could it be?'   sakusa thought in disbelief   'have i finally found a companion who doesn't smell like sweat and deodorant?!' 

'this body wash.. did she get it from atsumu?'  he pondered in curiosity 

sakusa looked over to atsumu who was dramatically fanning himself on the ground while osamu kicks his side 

'no. that man probably uses 3-in-1 shampoo as soap. it's impossible.'   he concluded 

"y/n." he called out in a deep and gruff tone. "yes?" she blinked cluelessly in response 

sakusa leaned forward to align his nose with her neck, staying silent as he closed his eyes and hummed in content. "what?" y/n mumbled in surprise as she nervously looked down to see sakusa deeply concentrating as he does this 

'i-is he sniffing me?! did he think i smell weird?!'  she panicked 

'should i have sprayed some alcohol on me first??'  she thought to herself as she flusteredly covered her face 

"kiyoomi-kun?" she called out with a nervous chuckle as she covered her bright red cheeks "what are you doing?" she asks him in embarrassment 

"yeah, what are you doing?" suna abruptly chimed in as he crossed his arms over his chest 

sakusa side eyed the middle blocker and shook his head in response. he pulled his mask over his nose and shrugged. "nothing." he said "i was just curious about something" "curious about her neck?" suna raised a brow 

"why do you care so much, suna?" sakusa asked him with furrowed brows 

"i don't. i just find it weird that you were so close to smothering your face in my best friend's neck..." suna shrugged nonchalantly "but whatever, i guess" 

sakusa ignored him and scooted closer to the girl, not so discreetly sticking close to her side "are you feeling alright, kiyoomi-kun?" she laughed nervously 

"yeah. just thinking about making you my best friend as well, from now on" he said as he stuffed his hands in his pockets 

"eh?! what about me?!" atsumu cried out as he ran towards sakusa "you were never my best friend." sakusa said in a cold and monotonous tone as he stared atsumu down 

"you're so mean, omi-omi!!" atsumu cried as he started sprinting towards him in full speed with his arms open wide 

"dont come near me- don't you dare." sakusa warned him with a glare "atsumu, don't-" he was cut off by atsumu's body colliding with his

"AGH, GET OFF ME!" sakusa exclaimed as he hastily tried to pry the blond off his torso

"NO! I'M SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR BEST FRIEND, OMI-OMI!" atsumu whined dramatically as he held onto sakusa's neck

"what are you all doing?" kita's voice filled the air 

the team, along with sakusa, froze as they slowly turned around to face the captain "we were just-" ginjima tried to explain 

"atsumu. please stop bothering our guest" kita sain in a monotonous tone as he stared atsumu down 

"y-yes, captain.." atsumu shuddered 

"suna." kita snapped his head to avert his heavy stare at the brunette, who currently had his arm slung around y/n's shoulders. 

the girl looked impossibly red as he stared up at suna with literal heart eyes, looking absolutely over the moon with the slightest touch she had received from him. 

"please stop holding y/n-san." he pleaded as he patiently waited for suna to retract his arm. y/n jumped in surprise as suna abruptly dropped his arm back to his side, and turned to walk away 

'no!! suna-kun stay and hold me!!'  she screamed internally as she watched his retreating figure 

kita watched as her soft smile suddenly dropped, and for her voluminous twin-braids to droop as a dark and gloomy aura surrounded her. kita's eyes widened as he hurriedly went to pat her back, in hopes of lifting her mood back up. 

"suna-kun" she called out like a child as she slumped lifelessly in kita's arms 

"suna. please come back and hold her." kita pleaded as he looked back at suna, who was scrolling on his phone 

"hm?" suna hummed mindlessly as he continued scrolling on his phone 

"i'll do it-" sakusa volunteered as he reached out to grab her hand

"no, i'll do it" suna quickly dismissed him as he made his way towards the girl 

"my ship is sailing" osamu nodded in silent triumph as he flipped atsumu off with a cold gaze "ha?! omi-omi! go out there and take her from suna!" atsumu commanded sakusa as he glared at his twin 

"no thanks" sakusa shrugged him off as he settled back on the bench 

"i thought you liked her!" atsumu wailed "i never said that" sakusa replied with furrowed brows 

"man, you're hopeless" atsumu sighed as he slapped sakusa's back "this must be why you've been single for so long" 

"i'd rather not hear it from someone who also doesn't have a girlfriend." sakusa deadpanned "that one must've hit close to home" osamu whistled teasingly "shut up! you're both so mean!" atsumu exclaimed through gritted teeth as he glared at his friend and his brother 

aran sighed as he walked past the three boys bickering.

"youre all single as hell, what're you taking about?" aran said as he gave them the side eye 

"i-" 

[words-for-holland]

Quarantine Series: Burnt Out

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Y/N has to work from home during Quarantine, but when she gets extremely busy it’s up to Tom to find a way to help her relax .

A/N: This is my second attempt at this piece. Last time I created this it was super long but it got deleted 😩

Check the Rest: Burnt Out | A New Look | Secret Cuts & Kisses | Breaking Friendships |The Birthday Week | Movie Night | Silence is Golden?|

All Y/N ever wanted was an opportunity to work from home. Then again, who wouldn't want that opportunity? All she could think about was how nice it’d be to work in the comfort of her own home, not have to dress up in business professional clothing, and most importantly be surrounded by the people she cared for the most. But as the saying goes, “Be careful for what you wish for.”

When a global pandemic decided to take over 2020, Y/N certainly got her wish. Her company was forced to work from home until further notice, but what she didn’t expect was the amount of work she would be given. Y/N was pulled from project to project with deadlines thin as paper, and was expected to pick up the extra work of those that were no longer with the company. There was no time to catch a breath, and there certainly was no time to spend with her beloved boyfriend, Tom. This only made Y/N more depressed and made the Holland boys only more concerned.

“Mate, you got to get her to take a break. She’s gonna overdo it.” Harrison commented to his best friend, as they watched Y/N type away like a zombie from the kitchen.

“You think I don’t know that?!” Tom responded with a defeated sigh. “Every time I ask her, she always brushes it off and claims shes fine. Don't get me wrong, Im proud of her and admire her work ethic, but damn its sucking the life out of her.”

Both Harrison and Tom continued to observe Y/N with a cup of tea on hand, wondering how long it would take before she snapped. Tom hated seeing her like this. To him this wasn’t fair. It’s not fair that her 8 hour shift now became a 15 hr shift. Its not fair that she had to work 3 weekends straight, and it certainly wasn’t fair that her company took precious time away to be together. It was hard enough already that he couldn’t spend time with Y/N like a normal boyfriend would because of filming. Now, that he has the opportunity to make up for the lost time, it’s taken away.

“What if you surprised her?” Harrison quipped.

Tom looked up at his best friend with curious eyes. It took a few minutes to sink in, until the brightest idea figuratively smacked him in the face. “Yeah...yeah!” he responded, a smile forming “And I think I know exactly how to do it.”

As Tom was working through the thought process of his brilliant plan, his younger brother entered the kitchen, looking for his usual afternoon snack. “Hey, does anyone know where —. Oh no...” Harry groaned as he looked up at Tom and Harry. “Whatever it is that you two are planning...Leave me out of it.”

“Come on, mate. You dont even know what were planning.” Harrison defended

“Believe me, I know enough and any plan that involves you in it, is likely to fail 99.9% of the time.” Harry opened up his bag of crisps as he continued to list out the other 99 possible reason why they should have left Y/N alone like she wanted. “Cmon guys, you know how she gets. When she doesnt want to be bothered, she doesnt want to be bothered.”

“You’re right Harry, but she’s so stressed, she’s homesick, and one day she’s going to overdo it. Id be a shit boyfriend, if I let it happen.” Tom reasoned. “Look, Im not trying to do anything crazy here. I just want to give her that sense of comfort and see her relax.”

Harry looked at his brother and then at Harrison, both displaying their best puppy dog eyes, in hopes that he’ll join in. “The face doesnt work on me...but I’ll help for Y/N’s sake.”

Meanwhile, Y/N continued her work in the living room, her eyes firmly glued to the computer screen. After being dragged into the kitchen and the Holland plan, Tuwaine slowly made his way to Y/N. “Hey Y/N.” he happily greeted. “I think it’s time for you get some fresh air, don’t you think?”

Y/N looked up, her glasses slightly shifting forward down her nose. “You know theres this thing called being stuck in Quaratine right?” she responded, continuing to code her project.

“I think the real question is do you really want to work here when there’s just nothing but CONSTANT NOISE !” Tuwaine yelled out, hoping the others would catch on.

“What?!” Tom yelled back. It took him some time to realize what Tuwaine meant by his statement. “Oh...Right!” Quickly, Tom grabbed whatever pot or pan he could grab his hands on and dropped them on the counter. Harrison and Harry gave Tom the strangest look. “What? I gave him some noise?”, he shrugged.

“See?” Tuwaine smiled back at Y/N. “You wouldnt want to distract that working brain of yours with all this going on, right?” Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as Tuwaine as she looked at him and the closed off kitchen. Did they think she was born yesterday? Of course she knew they were up to something. None of the boys were subtle enough to keep everything hush hush.

Y/N shook her head and decided to just go with it. The faster she complied, the faster they’d leave her alone, which only meant more time to finish her work. Tuwaine helped carry her laptop, mouse, and charger to the porch as he led her outside. “See, arent you glad your outside, breathing in fresh air with no distractions?”, Tuwaine spoke out.

Y/N took her time to admire the view. “Wow”, she whispered under her breath. Y/N couldnt remember the last time she set foot outdoors. Seeing the sunlight hit the flower beds, the gentle breeze rustle through the grass; it was beautiful. Of course, the moment was short lived with a simple ding, which only multiplied by the second.

Y/N dripped her head back, trying to rub out the frustration from her face. “Yes, well it was fun while it lasted. Duty calls.”

“Im sure they wouldnt mind if you just took five minutes for yourself at least.” Tuwaine commented, feeling bad about the amount of work he saw popping up on your screen.

“Yeah well that’s Corporate for you. Doesnt matter if you’re 500 km away or if a virus is hurting the population. If you’re not working, you’re useless.” Y/N shrugs. It wasn’t like her company was completely evil, this was just how business worked.

“I know Y/N, and we all see that you care deeply about your work but we’re all so worried about you too. We want you to be mentally okay as well. I know Tom is worried about you the most...He misses you, you know.”

Y/N’s heart dropped the second she heard him say it. She knew that all of this was gonna take some time away from Tom, but she hadn’t realized how much he would be missing her, even though they’re living under the same roof. “Yeah I miss him too, more than anyone will know. Believe me.” Y/N pondered for a moment as she stared at the work in front of her. Perhaps five minutes couldn’t hurt. “Maybe I will take that break after all.”

“Really?”, Tuwaine was surprised she had agreed so quickly, and at the same time he panicked. Tom and the others were not ready for Y/N’s surprise yet. “On second thought, Im wrong. You should keep going and try to finish up that project of yours or else you’ll never be done.”

“Excuse me?” Y/N asked as she tried to close her laptop. “You just spent a whole half hour trying to convince me to stop working, and now you want me to go back and work?”

“Yeah..I mean what do I know, right?” He laughed nervously. Tuwaine looked back at the door, for some sort of signal. Come on man it’s not like your preparing a break for the Queen of England.

“Listen Tuwaine, if I go back there and you boys break anything in that house...I swear— I’ll”

“Y/N!” Tom interjected as he stepped out to the porch. He wrapped his arms behind her waist, giving her a gently kiss on the top of her head. “How’s work, my pretty girl?” He looked back at Tuwaine and mouthed a thank you to him as he left the love birds alone.

Y/N turned around to face Tom, taking in his features and running her hands at the nape of his neck. “Busy, but what else is new? I’ve been missing you a whole lot”

“Me too, darling. Anyway, Im really hoping you can take a break from all this because I’ve got something special for you.”

“Oh no, babe. You know you didnt have to anything for me. Really Im fine..I-“

“I wanted to. In fact the boys wanted in on it too. So this is really from all of us, if you think about it.” Tom grabbed Y/N’s hand as he led her back in to house. “Come.”

As they both enetered the house hand in hand, Tom led Y/N into the kitchen, where the rest of the boys waited with diner burgers in hand and warm homemade chocolate chip cookies on the side of table. What seemed like a simple meal was a cure for any bad day..at least for Y/N it was. It represented a sense of home for her, while being far from Jersey. Even though she hadnt realized it, Tom and the boys knew she needed it. “Wow” Y/N breathed “I...I dont know what to say.”

“Dont say, just eat” Harrison laughed. “In all honesty this was Tom’s idea. We just wanted to make sure you had the support you need.”

“Yeah you deserve this, so please enjoy it.” Harry added. With that, everyone dug in and bonded over a family dinner, sharing laughs and stories. Tom leaned toward Y/N whispering in her ear, “I have a few more surprises after this.”

The next few surprises did not disappointment. He set up a nice warm bath for the two of them to relax and enjoy each others compny. A few subtle kisses, laughter, and silence was shared between the two. Y/N leaned back into Tom’s chest, feeling the water gently flow back and forth. Breathing in and out, she had forgotten how good this felt. Being close to Tom, was a different experience, one that no one could ever do justice. This was what she really needed.

After the bath, Tom led her into their shared bedroom. For a moment, Y/N stopped him as she pulled his head down to hers, giving him the kiss he rightfully deserved. Her lips crashed with his, his hands gently holding the sides of her tiny face. He picked her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist and situated themselves on the bed. Reluctantly, they both pulled away, catching their breath. Their foreheads touching and noses gently rubbing the others. “I love you. I love you more than you could possibly know.” Y/N whispered to him

“And I love you. I just want to give you the world because you deserve it all. My hardworking pretty girl.” Of course all good things must come to an end.

After a great well spent break was shared between Y/N and Tom, she was back on the work grind. Only this time she was working in their room as Tom was reading a script for his next upcoming project. The more Y/N coded, the sleepier she was getting. It onyl took a few minutes before she started leaning into Tom and her eyes started to flutter. Her breaths became slower and she was out like a light.

Tom turned to look at Y/N, smiling to see the sight of her finally at peace. He removed her glasses and set them by her table side. Tom made sure to clock her out of work abd checked to see if her work was saved. Just as he was about to turn off her laptop, another message popped up. “Great”, he muttered, rolling his eyes at the fact her team is still working at this hour. He couldnt help but read it though. Just how badly did they need her anyway?

We all know how hard you’re working and going above and beyond to get these projects out the door. For that, we thank you! On behalf of the company we’d like you all to take a day off on us!

Tom smiled, relieved that shell finally get some time for herself. Feeling triumphant, he shut off her laptop and set it aside. Crawling back into the bed and covering themselves under the blanket. His arms wrapped her waist once again. “Goodnight, my love. Im so proud of you.” he whispered.

[marvelousell]

Can I request a smut oneshot about Tom? He's going rough on her and tied her up. He even uses toys like a whip and so on. And then he hurts her accidently and she can't say the save word because of a reason you can choose and then she starts to cry and he realises what he had done and is so sorry and she even has handprints on her body the next morning and he does everything to make it better

Kiss it better

A/N: This big piece of work made me tear up a little bit, we all know Tom is a real gentleman 🥺

Warnings: SMUT 18+, angst

Your and Tom’s sex life was anything but vanilla. That wasn’t a secret anyway. Yes, you do enjoyed slow, sensual sex, but this precise things got you both very excited. You being his obedient girl.

Everything was strictly consensual. You both were into this, having a chat before all of that even started. He knew what you liked, and agreed on, and he always made sure you were okay with that, before and especially during sex.

Well today was a bit different.

It was 7 pm by now. The sun now long gone. You were lying on your couch, still waiting for Tom, who was probably stuck at work. The faint sound of the dull rom-com was replaced with a roaring slam of the front door.

Uh oh someone had a crappy day.

Your expression puzzled, but still blank.

His jaw was clenching hard. His eyes now searching yours. The usual pair of soft brown eyes were replaced by a pair of much more darker and furious ones.

You knew that someone must’ve struck his nerve at work.

It wasn’t the first time. He needed a relief.

“You. Bed. Now.” He broke the eye contact removing his watch and coat.

Your marched into your shared bedroom, pulling your large t-shirt away. Sitting on your legs, in only your half soaked panties, you couldn’t hide the accelerated heartbeat of yours.

You loved angry Tom. The excitement was making you aroused more and more every second.

Your mind was running absolutely wild. You knew you needed to listen and behave. Oh but you needed a small touch right now.

Your hand now cupping your heat, while the other one was playing with your nipple.

“You can’t listen to an order, hm?” His voice harsh. Your breath shortened.

“No one really listens. I’m really not a fan of that.” Stripping himself, he came near you, only to push you flat on your stomach.

“Hands behind.” He tied your hands as tight as he could.

He was angry, his co-workers making him feel like a fool.

The sound of him searching for something in the drawers, made you shuffle.

His legs parted yours, making himself comfortable between you. The buzzing of the toy started echoing, making you hide your face into the pillow.

The toy was now placed on your clit, and while you were focusing on the pleasure it was giving you, Tom slammed into you without a single warning making you gasp from the slight pain.

Tom buried himself inside of you, now taking the whip, stroking it gently on your right cheek.

The cold sensation on your warm skin made you shiver. Once again without a warning he slapped you with it, making you jump. He was now fully into it, slapping you as hard as ever, starting a pool of tears in your eyes.

The toy was doing its job, your walls tightening around him. He could feel it, his movements fast, removing the toy and himself from you.

“Now, now, only good girls can cum isn’t that true?” His palm landing on your ass harshly a few times. You tried to free your hands, unsuccessfully, only to feel the material burning into your wrists.

The edging went on and on, he would slam into you so hard, mixing the pain with the need for your release.

It was all to much.

“Tom.” You said through the tears.

“Don’t want to hear a word from you sweetie, be a good girl for once.” Moving his free palm to shut you up, and if he did that you would shatter, the sex wasn’t enjoyable at all at the moment.

You needed him to stop. But the safe word for the two of you, that was tap twice on my thigh to stop, was in this situation not effective.

“Tom, s-stop, RED.” You shouted in tears, turning your head from him.

“Fucking hell.” He began untying you.

The crying and aching in-between your thighs was horrible. The whole scene was a disaster. He went to far at this point. His eyes watering seeing you hurt, and the hurting coming from him, made his heart split into pieces.

“Baby, I-I’m, fuck come here I’m so fucking sorry.” He was now so gentle, afraid that he would break you.

Still crying in his arms, he placed you on the pillows, dressing you up.

“I can’t-I, words can’t describe how much of an idiot I am. I’m truly sorry.”

“I was so selfish taking the anger out on you, without asking if anything was okay with you. Hell baby you know how much I love you. Let me take care of you.” He pleaded, eyes full of regret.

“It’s okay Tom. Just a little bit too much for me.” You sniffled.

“I know love I’m a fucking prick, let me run us a nice bath, and afterwards I will make you your favourite tea and we can cuddle all night on the couch. Yeah?” He insisted to make things better.

“That sounds lovely.”

The next morning, the remaining pain woke you up.

You tried the best not to wake Tom up, but it looked like he was wide awake for a while now.

The guilt was eating him up. The purple bruises that were now showing on your wrists and bum, made him realise how much of an egocentric he was the previous night.

“My love…” Taking your hands into his, kissing them gently.

“I’m once again so sorry, this isn’t me, that’s all I wanted you to know. Im genuinely sorry.” He repeated himself many times.

“It’s fine, really Tommy. We sorted it all yesterday.” You grabbed his face, searching for his eyes to look at you.

“I love you, and I will show you how much. This day is just about you my love.” He kissed you passionately, embracing you in a big soft cuddle.

[violetnotez]

HC: BNHA Boys x Reader who is Going Through a Break Up

@Dekulover555: Hey can I get a request so my boyfriend has just broken up with me randomly could you do head cons or a story of the bhna boys as the best freind who was there when he broke up with her and the best freind ends up kissing them and the boys have had a crush on this girl for a long time?

Omg babes Im sorry you had to deal with that, that just sucks I’m so so sorry! I hope these make you feel better in some way- I wrote these as HC and 4 of the BNHA boys for ya! And um kinda forgot to put the kissing part in- but i hope you like these regardless!

 Also- that is literally such a crappy thing to do… me and Bakugo gonna beat him up for ya dont you worry! >:(

(RULES | MASTERLIST| REQUESTS OPEN!!! :))

-----------------------------

IZUKU

You and Deku were having a quick study session in his room, him quizzing you on hero terms as you racked your brain to remember the definitions

Your phone suddenly buzzed- making him jump: he was so focused on just you, and how adorable you looked when you were concentrating hard, and the fact he had a girl in his room-kinda startled him out of his over reactive thoughts

You gave him a swift sorry, laughing softly because it was literally written on his face that he was freaked out by the sound, making him blush- he loved your laugh so much

The instant you read the message on your phone, your face just dropped in horror

“Hey I know this is a shitty thing to do but I think we need to break up”

You kept staring at the screen, feeling the world around you crumple- what did you even do? Why was he breaking up with you so suddenly?

Your hand was covered around your mouth, trying to choke back the tears

“Y/n…..y/n!” Izuku asked in a panic, freaking out inside- what happened to you to change your demeanor that fast

 “Are you okay? What’s wrong? Please talk to me!”

“He...he...he broke up with me, Izuku,” you sniffled, the tears flowing down your cheeks 

Izuku stared at you, completely stunned and full of anger. He was just disgusted he wouldn’t even give you the decency to do it in person, let alone just leave you confused on why.

 how could your boyfriend do that to you! You were so kind, and sweet, and so lovable....in his eyes, you were the most perfectly imperfect person and he had fallen for you hard.

 “I dont even know what I did-” you cried in confusion, “Did I do something wrong? I-”

He immediately wrapped you in a hug, his warm embrace making you feel more vulnerable (which is good- feelings are valid and Broccoli Boi will take care of u!)

“This isn’t your fault y/n-none of this is. You’re amazing just as you are-he just cant seem to see that.”

-----------------------------

BAKUGO

OH HELL NO BAKUGO GONNA KILL SOMEONE

You and Bakugo were having a sparring session when your phone went off

“You cant turn that damn thing off?” Bakugo grunted out, hating that your attention was being taken away from him

“Sorry Katsu, gotta answer- its my boyfriend,” you smiled, downing a gulpful of water before your answered the phone

All Bakugo did was grunt in distaste- he hated your boyfriend! He found him so annoying

all he ever did was take up his time with you-it seemed like whenever Bakugo wanted to hang out, he was there, ruining the moment

or even worse- you would go out and hang out with your dumb boyfriend instead of him

He always denied having any feelings for you, but he noticed now he couldnt seem to help it- he found you attractive, physically and personalty wise, but also- you dealt with his crap. He knew he was a hand full, but you still kept him in check and were even brave enough to mess around with him, even if he did yell at you.

 He just didnt like how much control you had over him, making him flustered and blushing like a damn school girl- and the fact that you didnt even know you had this secret power drove him crazy

“Wait-youre breaking up with me?” you asked in disbelief, your eyes prickling with tears

Did he just hear what he thought he heard? Bakugo picked up his head so quick hearing your voice break, as if your whole body was just crumpling. He had to admit, he was kinda happy to hear it- now he’d finally have his chance to ask you out! But hearing you sound so defeated made his heart race faster and the anger erupt in his chest. How dare he make you feel that way!

Bakugo stomped towards you, snatching your phone out of your hands

“I dont know what your deal is, you asshole, but y/n is one of the most amazing people I know, so dont you ever call her number again unless you want your ass blown out of the damn country!”

-----------------------------

TODOROKI

Todoroki was sitting on the couch,drinking tea and reading a book

He had found one of your notebooks left on the floor, and he of course, instantly wanted to give it back to you

Unknowing to him, you were currently up in your room, Facetiming your boyfriend

Shouto didnt really care for your boyfriend- and for the longest time he couldnt understand why he didnt like him

but then he realized some things- whenever he was around you, he would get blushy and extremely quiet and just seemed incapable of acting normal. He found you attractive and exceptionally kind, catching himself staring at you whenever he could and feeling strange about it, causing a soft blush to form on his pale skin

 Thats when he realized he didnt like your boyfriend because he liked you, and he despised the fact that someone had already taken your heart

He knocked on your door, hearing the voices on the other side get more and more frustrated

He heard a slight sob come out of your mouth, and he instantly got panicked

What was wrong?

He knocked on the door again, unsure of what to do- does he barge in there? Does he leave you alone? Does he wait?

In mid knock, you opened the door, your eyes puffy and red

“Y/n-are you alright?” he asked, his face in complete shock and confusion

You shook your head, unable to talk due to the heavy sometimes growing inside you

“Its okay, Shouto,” you practically whispered, “just this isnt the best time-”

He placed a hand on your shoulder, looking at you with those deep, mismatched eyes that made you shiver- they were so easy to get lost in

“Please, y/n, tell me whats wrong.”

He hated seeing you upset- it made him upset, and he wanted to know who did this to you. He wasn't one to act out irrationally, but when it came to you, he would do anything to protect you.

“Its- its my boyfriend. He’s breaking up with me-”

“Hey y/n, where you at?” he heard from the phone, registering the voice as your boyfriend. Immediately, fury formed in his stomach-if he could see him right now- he would have to do everything in his power to hold his powers back from obliterating your boyfriend-

 he strided over, picking up the phone, meeting the shocked eyes of your boyfriend, expecting you to come on the screen

“Please refrain from ever calling y/n again- you make her upset and you clearly cannot understand how much of a wonderful person she truly is. If you ever come to try and hurt her again, I wont hesitate to make sure you dont ever do this to her again.”

-----------------------------

KIRISHIMA

Kirishima was walking out of his room, the rest of the class outside as he was the last one to change out of his PE uniform and into his lounge clothes

“Kirishima!”

He turned around, hearing your cry

Confusion was written on his face- you were running up to him, desperate to reach him

Your face was strewn with tears, sobs crying out of your mouth as you called out his name again

“Kirishima!”

Those sobs were destroying him- what was wrong? Who hurt you? Why were you so upset- he had never seen you like this! 

He had had the biggest crush on you for the longest time, and seeing you sad made him just wanted to fix everything and make you feel better, because when you were upset, he couldnt help but feel upset too!

You wrapped your arms around him, your chest colliding with his as you sobbed onto your best friend

He instantly shielded you in a warm hug, combing your hair with his palm, letting you get all your emotions out

“Hey-” he asked softly, gently raising you chin with the tips of your fingers, “what’s the matter?”

You sniffled, your face splotchy and pink, “My boyfriend-he-he-broke up with me.”

Kirishima clenched his jaw, feeling anger bubble in his stomach. So that’s the reason your so heartbroken, over that idiot? He was completely dumbfounded on why he would ever break up with you- how could someone ever just reject his amazing y/n?

He wrapped you in a hug again, placing a firm kiss on top your head

“Your okay y/n, dont worry about him. Your an amazing person and he just cant seem to see that. I got you, I promise.”

-----------------------------

Requests open!

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

[krabmeat]

🐰- do you believe in soul mates?

kinda? its more like, i believe anyone can be happy with anyone! i dont think there is ONE person who is a perfect match romantically, though i do believe in platonic soulmates! :]

💌- diary or journal?

i dont have either, but i occasionally write and vent in google docs or by writing poems or short stories!

✨- which fictional character (book, show, or movie) do you relate to most?

mmmm, maybe c!technoblade if that counts? oh! and also c!quackity! :DD

💕- are you crushing on someone?

nnnope! kinda? i dunno! 

💋- kissing in the dark or kissing in the rain?

in the dark. itll make it less awkward and waaayyy more practical

🐝- describe your aesthetic in emojis

😳💚🛠🌿💣🖋〽

🍼- what is your favorite memory?

playing hide and seek at night with my cousins! >:]]]

🌸- what is your favorite flower?

honeysuckle!!

💖- have you ever been in love?

i wouldnt say so! I would hope not-- just tiny pangs of attraction to people i know every now and again -v-

🍰- strawberry or vanilla?

mmmmm vanillaaaa

🍯- describe your favorite smell

p i n e s o l

🎂- if you had 3 wishes, what would they be?

erase implicit bias, get therapy, and meeting the RAM system! (you guys are wonderful mmmmmm)

🍪- cookie dough or cookies?

cookie dough! not the purposely edible kind, the ones with egg in it. its all about the thrill of salmonella entering my system

☕- coffee or tea?

TEAAA!!!

I COULD RAMBLE ABOUT HOW GOOD TEA IS

AAAAAAAAA

🍃- would you rather live in a sea with mermaids or a forest with fairies?

the sea with mermaids! Itll be like creative mode but underwater and irl

🍂- what’s your middle name?

Arely! :]

💫- what is your sun, moon, and rising sign?

my sun sign is virgo and my moon sign is leo! not sure about rising though vkshfkahdj--

🌧️- favorite thing to do on rainy days?

as of lately, i enjoy opening my window and letting the smell and slight dampness fill up my room while im just vibing

🍭- how tall are you?

………..5'3"-

💒- which show would you want to live in?

im not sure if this counts, 

BUT THE DREAM SMP!!!

i know, i know, its a bunch of political warfare filled with character trauma, 

BUT HEAR ME OUT

i have my own strategies and sh-t and just how to get along while both being included in plot and NOT getting too mentally scarred. me and a couple friends actually came up with a whole au on if we were in the smp!! very fun! :D

🎄- what is your favorite holiday?

halloween! the spooky season is upon us in october, mmmmm >:]

🍦- what scented candle is your favorite?

i really like tree-scented candles!

🎶- favorite song right now?

Cabinet Man and Eighth Wonder, both by Lemon Demon!

(IM ALSO SO HYPE FOR WILBUR SOOTS NEW SONG TO COME OUT "LOVE JOY" MMMMMMMM)

💘- 3 ways to win your heart?

be trustworthy

give me freedom and understanding

tell me every now and then youre proud of me!

(ikik the last one is a bit snobby and conceited but it really just hits hard since im never told it very often, makes me tear up every time -v-)

🍩- current mood?

in slight constant pain but overall pretty snazzy!!

❄️- what is your favorite season?

winter and autumn! snow and cold is poggers

💍- your current relationship status?

MMMMMMM SINGLE AND POGGERS

📷- a photo of yourself

NO 💚

💅🏻- do you like being spoiled?

not really! it makes me feel very guilty and embarrassed when someone spoils me with pretty much anything! im a very self dependent person so i also just always feel like i could have worked harder for it myself!

🕊️- 3 habits you have?

i unconsciously move and wiggle my body to the rhythm and vibe a song gives me

i use my fingers like drums and pretend to be the drummer whenever i think of a song i like

i occasionally talk to myself--

🦄- how do you perceive yourself?

mmm, to put it frank-

a person who doesnt deserve anything they have and a kid who the world is too good for

🦋- how do you think others perceive you?

fake!

🌈- things I find attractive in girls/guys

someone who embraces a wardrobe that doesnt believe in gender roles

🍓- one secret about yourself

not much of a secret, more so of a cool little fact!

my left index finger tip is numb!

🍒- how do you act when you have a crush?

idk, just like--

treat em like a close homie!!

💔- the reason behind your last breakup?

breakup w h o ?

certainly not me, relationships are complicated mannnn

💬- what your last text message says?

"Lmao, bot"

⛅- what is your morning routine?

On weekdays, wake up to my alarm at 7 am and brush my teeth, change my clothes and get on my phone until its 7:30 am and then i get on my school calls

💗- who do you miss?

MY WONDERFUL IRL BEST FRIEND

AND THE RAM SYSTEM

ALONG WITH OTHER ONLINE FRIENDS MMMMMM

(i have my reasons foshfksbdjsb)

🥀- last time you cried?

last night at like 12 am!

🎁- when is your birthday?

september 8th

🔪- scariest/creepiest experience?

n o 💚

💤- date someone younger, older, or same age as you?

Preferably someone the same age, but i dont mind a small age gap! :D

[fatrainbowmermaidunicorn]

The Other Girl (Jungkook X You) (ONESHOT)

A/N: Its a bit short but I hope you will like it <3

MASTERLIST

A/N : And also, I’m trying a new thing here and you are in no way obligated to do it but if any of you like my stories and want to give some support, why not buy me a coffee? ☕💜

Jungkook and Rissa.

They are the ultimate couple that everyone want to be. That everyone envy. They are the definition of perfect, romantic, lovable. Everything you want to be as a couple. And everyone always thinks, no, know, that they will end up together forever. There is no way one of them would love someone else, theres no way one of them would leave the other for anyone else.

Y/N smiles and looks into Jungkook's eyes who staring back at her. And she is sure as hell that no one could have ever thought she would be the one who would steal's Jungkook's heart from Rissa.

Thats right, shes the other girl.

Jungkook has always been her dream guy. She has had her eyes on his the moment he step on stage on his debut day. But Y/N is just a trainee, and as Jungkook and his group grew more popular, she knows her chances with him are slim to none. Y/N's heart broke to pieces when she found out that Jungkook also has a long time childhood girlfriend whom he loves so much. Everybody favorite's couple.

Rissa.

It doesnt help that Rissa is the definition of a perfect girl. Beautiful, soft spoken, intelligent, funny, kindhearted. Everything a girl wants to be. And every guy wants to be with. Everybody tells Jungkook thats hes lucky to be with her. That he should hold on to her forever.

They are the perfect couple in everyones eyes.

But all that never once stop Y/N from continuing to crush on him, falling in love with him. Once she debuted herself, Y/N slowly make her way to be friends with Jungkook's hyungs, his friends and slowly, very slowly, make his way into Jungkook's heart.

And now, here she is. In Jungkook's embrace, lips locked with each othet like theres no tomorrow. They have been seeing each other in secret for almost six months now, and it was the most wonderful time for Y/N. The best moments of her life.

"I love you Kookie," she giggles and hugs his neck.

"And you know I love you too baby," he smile and leans in to kiss her. A long, deep, passionate kiss. "I have to go," he pouts. "But I promise I will call you before you go to bed?"

Y/N pouts playfully.

"Do you really have to go home to her, Kookie?"

"You know I dont want to baby, but you know I have to. For now. Okay?" Jungkook smile and stroke her hair. "I love you Y/N,"

"I love you too, so much Kookie. We are going to be together for real, soon right? You promise right? That you will choose me?"

"You know I do baby. Just give me some time yeah?" Jungkook smile and kiss her one last time before leaving.

Y/N pouts alone. Thats the promise Jungkook keeps on giving her ever since they got together. That he will leave Rissa. That they will be an official couple. That he never loves Rissa. That he loves her so much more.

All those promises, they are nice to hear, but deep down, Y/N knows that Rissa will always be Jeon Jungkook's first love and he will always, always love her.

/////

"Hey bunny, you are back. Hows practice?" Rissa smiles and gives him a quick kiss.

"It was okay. Just the usual. Hyungs bickering, Jin hyung fell and all thay," he laughs. "How about you? How was your day princess?" Jungkook smile and kiss her back.

"Same old, same old. Nothing interesting like yours, Im sure," she giggles. "I cooked your favorite for dinner today bunny. Why dont you shower, since you are all sweaty and smelly, and we can have dinner together?"

"Yah, you like it when I'm sweaty," Jungkook grins and winks, making her blush. "But yeah, I'll take a quick shower and I'll be down in a bit okay princess?" Jungkook smile, gives her another kiss and head to the bathroom.

As her usual routine, Rissa went over to where Jungkook throws his clothes and collect his dirty laundry for washing. And just like every single day since the last few months, theres the same perfume smell lingering all over his clothes. A women's perfume. The same one. And of course, stain of lipstick in random places on his clothes. She doesnt want to believe it. Its so unreal that Jungkook would do that to her. But it has been months. Theres no denying it anymore.

Rissa sighs.

Jungkook is still cheating. And she dont know how long her heart can pretend otherwise

/////

"How is the food bunny?" Rissa smile, looking at the man sitting from across of him.

"Delicious as always princess," he smiles and to show he meant it, shoved a large amount of food inside his mouth, making his cheeks blows up like a chipmunk. Rissa giggles. Shes going to miss this mam so so much.

"Im glad you love it bunny. You deserve the best after a tiring day at work,"

"I dont know what I do to deserve you princess. Im the luckiest guy in the world," Jungkook smile and hold her hand from across the table. Rissa stop chewing. Something in what Jungkoom said hit a cord, and it just hurts. So much.

"Jungkook?" Rissa looks up at him.

"Yes?" Jungkook frowns. Its unusual for her to call him by his real name. "Is everything okay?" Jungkook is confused. They were happy just a second ago. What could have happened?

"You know I love you very much right?" Rissa asked, eyes softly looking into his.

"Of course I do know princess. Whats wrong? Anything bothering you? Want to tell me?" Jungkook stops eating and frowns heavily.

"And you. You love me right Jungkook? Just as much as I love you?"

"Rissa, princess. You already know the answer. Of course I love you. You are my life. Now, can you tell me whats going on?"

"Nothing really," she smile and looks down at her plate, slowly playing with her food. "I just want you to know, that it has always been you for me Jungkook. No one else. And Ive never wanted or look at anyone else either. You are my dream come true, and I'm sorry..." she sniffles.

"Sorry? What for? Hey, why are you crying princess?" Jungkook stands up and walks to her side, squating down to her level, startled by her sudden tears.

"Im sorry if I bore you. If my love for you isnt enough. If I am not what you wanted. What you still wanted. Ive tried my best to love you. Im just sorry Im just simply not... enough," she sniffles harder, looking down at her lap.

"Hey, what are you even talking about? Not enough? Where did all this even came from?" Jungkook smile and lifted her chin to look at him. "I love you. Only you. Forever and always right? You are ny everything. You are everything I wanted and everything I could ever dream of. Theres nothing to worry about. I promise. Okay?"

Rissa nodded weakly, knowing everything he said is nothing but empty promises.

They make love that night. Love so passionate, that one could never thought that theres a third person between their love. But there is. And even after a passionate night together, Rissa will never forget the fact.

/////

It has been a few months since that night. And the same thing still happens every single day. Late night texts, whispered calls when Jungkook thought she was sleeping, perfumes and lipstick stain on his clothes... its even worse now because Rissa now knows whos Jungkook is actually cheating with.

Enough is enough. Enough time and chances has been given. Its time. Its time to finally do something about it.

/////

She looks at her. Her beautiful face, with a tired smile plastered on, but still beautiful nevertheless. Y/N can tell right now why Jungkook loves her. She never gets mad, she never raises her voice at him, whenever hes tired, mad or upset, whenever he yells at her for no reason at all, she will say she understand. Her love for Jungkook is unconditional, and Y/N is the reason why Jungkook is hurting her.

"Rissa," was all she could choked out as she looks into her eyes.

"Hello Y/N," she smiles. "Its nice to finally meet you in person. Come, have a seat,"

Y/N feels her throat dries up nervously. Not really sure know what Rissa meant by that. What she being sarcastic? Sincere? What is it? Why did she ask to meet her? Does Jungkook knows about this?

"I- uh yeah, its nice to finally meet you in person too. I-I have heard so much about you," Y/N smiles nervously.

"I'm sure," she laughs. A beautiful sound. How can she still smile brightly at her? Knowing that she has been with her man for so long? Y/N is sure Rissa knows.

"I-uh.."

"Im kidding!" She laughs. "Dont worry Y/N, you dont have to be nervous. I dont bite," she laughs again. "Lets just talk  is girls. Yeah? I think we have so mich to talk about, dont you?"

Y/N nods again, nervously.

"Listen Rissa. Jungkook and I..." Y/N stops her words, not knowing herself what she should be saying. Apologize? Beg her to give Jungkook to her? Ask her to share? Explain to Rissa her feelings towards Jungkook? She has no idea. No idea at all what to do or say.

But lucky for her, she doesnt have to think further as Rissa cut her off.

"Im leaving Jungkook,"

Y/N looks at her, mouth slightly gapped open. Out of all the 1001 scenarios in her head, she never expected this to come out from Rissa's mouth. Y/N had imagined Rissa would yell, scream, hit her, slap her, laugh at her, throw a tantrum, everything anf any possible reaction, but not this. Never this.

"What? Rissa you-"

"Im leaving him, and thats my decision," she smile and take a sip of her tea. "Dont get me wrong Y/N. Iys not that I hate him, or stop loving him. I love him. I love Jungkook so much. More than anyone can ever imagined," she smiles softly. "We have been together since we were teenagers. We grew up together, and I always thought me and him are destined to be together till the end of times,"

Y/N clear her throat awkwardly. She wish the earth would just swallow her right now. The pain and hurt in Rissa's voice pierced right through her heart. She has caused another woman pain. When did she become this? What has she done?

"But I cant make something that doesnt work anymore, work... I tried. Oh god, believe me, I tried," she smile again, but a sad one. "You know... I have known about you two for the longest time,"

"Y-you did?"

Rissa laughs, a beautiful one.

"Of course silly. I think everyone knows," she smile again. "You two are always together. And when you two are together, you guys dont really keep it subtle. And it doesnt help how nervous his hyungs were went I asked them where Jungkook went when I surprise him at practice," she giggles but Y/N knows Rissa's heart is breaking. Memories with Jungkook flashes through her mind. The kisses, quickies, secret dates between shows, practices, asking his hyung to lie for them eventhough they know they didnt approve. All those days that they thought were subtle enough and kept a secret.... every little thing they did, her happiness, all at the expense of this beautiful girl's broken heart. What has she done?

"But I thought, maybe Jungkook just need a distraction. We have been together for so long, and in his line of work, he meets pretty girls like you every single day. Hes a man afterall. So I thought, maybe after he gets it out of his system, he will come back to me. That our love was still intact,"

"Y-you knew... and you are willing to let him cheat?"

"I love him Y/N. Ive never love anyone. Hes my everything, my first and I thought, if being with someone else makes him happy, makes him come back to me eventually, Im willing to," she sighs. "But I was wrong. I dont think his love for me is the same as before,"

"Thats not true Rissa! Jungkook loves you! I know he does!" Y/N raises her voice. She dont know why shes trying to protect Jungkook's and Rissa's love when Jungkook has been everything she wanted. With Rissa gone, she shpild be happy. Jungkook is all hers. But something doesnt seems right. Their love is too beautiful to destroy.

Rissa smile softly and stroke Y/N's hand across the table.

"I know you want to believe that Y/N. Maybe so that you wont feel so bad. But truly, its okay. Havent you heard the saying, if you love two people at the same time, choose the second one. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second one? You are the second one Y/N,"

"B-but Rissa. Jungkook-"

"Stop," she raised her hand and shakes her head. "Stop trying to change my mind because I wont. Y/N, I think I owe it to myself to leave. I have done everything to love Jungkook and I dont think its fair for me to share his love when I have given my everything to him," tears finally falls down her soft cheeks. "I finally found the courage to leave, to let go of this fairytale that I wanted so much to come true and finally give myself something I deserve. Someone I deserve. I believe that I deserve someone who will love me for all that I am, and who will give everything he has for me, just like I will do for him. And thats no longer Jungkook," Rissa slowly wiped down her tears and takes a deep breathe.

"So, do me a favour yeah? Love him, take care of him and show him the same kind of love that I have been giving him all these years," she flashed a small smile as she took of the ring from her finger and placed it on Y/N's open palm. "This... Jungkook gave me this when we first met. Its a promise ring he said. We fell in love at first sight," she laughs. "Stupid, I know. But we were young and he promised me, that one day, when hes finally made it when he found everything hes chasing all this while, he will marry me, he will propose with a proper ring," she laughs. "Jungkook is always so dramatic, dont you think?"

Y/N looks at the ring and without realizing, tears has streamed down her face too. Jungkook truly loves her. And Rissa, shes willing to let go so that hes happy. Thats how strong their love are. And here she is, a monster! A home wrecker! What has she done? What has she done?!

"Hes all yours now Y/N. And thankyou for making me realize my worth," she smile one last time and stands up. Without looking back, Rissa walks out, leaving her painful love story for a better future without Jeon Jungkook in it.

/////

"Jungkook?" Y/N walked into their messy apartment after walking aimlessly for a few hours, thinking about her earlier meeting with Rissa. Furnitures are upside down everywhere, vases are broken, books are strewn across the floors. Y/N quickly try to look for Jungkook, hoping hes alright, not sure whats happening.

"Kookie??" She ran to their bedroom and found Jungkook in the dark, at the far corner hugging his knees. Y/N immediately went over and sits besides him, hugging his shoulder. "Kookie? Are you okay? What happened? Did we get rob? What happened? Tell me? Are yoi okay?"

"S-she left. She left me. She left...."

Y/N feels her heart beats faster. Okay, Jungkook has found out then. Rissa must have moved out from their apartment.

"Kookie, baby....I-I know,"

Jungkook looks up with his tear strained face.

"Y-you knew?"

"I-" Y/N paused for a moment. Not knowing if she should proceed. "R-Rissa... she asked to meet me earlier today..."

"She what?" Jungkook immediately perked up and turns to look at Y/N. A part of her feels hurt that Jungkook cares so much about Rissa, that he showed it, especially in front of her. Didnt he say that he loves her? That he wants a future with her? That he will leave Rissa for her? Then what is all this? Shouldnt he be happy instead? Y/N shakes the thoughts away. This is not the time to think about herself. Right?

"She asked to meet me Kookie... and I didnt know what its for until we met," Y/N looks into his eyes whos looking at her, confused. "Rissa... she uh.. she gave me this," she slowly and reluctantly gave Jungkook the ring. Jungkook just stare at it, as if its some poisonous snake that he shouldnt touch.

"Kookie?" Y/N whispered slowly. "Y-you okay?"

He jolted from her the sound of her voice, like someone shocked him and grab the ring, surprising Y/N, and threw the tiny ring across the room.

"She thinks she can just leave me like that?! No fucking way! We promised forever! She promised she will be with me until forever!" Jungkook suddenly screamed. Y/N was taken aback, both by his sudden outburst and whats hes saying. Doesnt Jungkook remember who is with him right now? Doesnt he remember that he promised her forever? That hes supposed to love her, to be with her?

"Kookie p-please calm down," Y/N pulled him tight into her embrace, trying to calm him, immediately making Jungkook burst into tears. "Im sorry Kookie. Im sorry, Im really, really sorry,"

Im really sorry I fell in love with you.

/////

Y/N knows. Oh she knows Jungkook is only staying in the relationship with her, being with her all because of guilt. Just to prove that he made the right decision, that he didnt regret what he did, that he didnt regret he cheated, that hes happy with her. Because, if he didnt... if hes not happy... then he just threw away Rissa, his love, the greatest thing that could have happened in his life, for... her.

The other girl.

Y/N knows, everytime Jungkook thinks she wasnt looking, she saw him staring blanklessly out the window. And Y/N knows hes thinking about her. Her smile, her laugh, if shes thinking of him too. But Y/N also know, that she isnt. Y/N knows that Rissa have moved on. That she would probably have found another man that would love her woth all his heart, make her happpy. The kind of man she deserves. A man that would appreciate her. Why would she think about a man so stupid, a mam who broke her heart like its nothing, so idiotic, a man who would threw out a girl like herself, for a girl like her...

The other girl.

After Jungkook calmed down that day, he asked Y/N to tell hin everything that Rissa told her. Because Rissa left without saying goodbye, without saying anything. Jungkook came back from practice to find all Rissa's things gone. Her stuffed animals, their photos together, her shoes, her books in the side table. Everything. All traces of her... gone.

And thats when Y/N knew how much Rissa was hurting from what she did. Maybe she didnt show it, she didnt say it, but it shows. Y/N also finally knew how much Rissa loves Jungkook. Because she cant even bare to see him one last time. She cant even say goodbye to him. Because she knows she will give in. She will give him another chance and he will break her all over again.

And Y/N finally knew how she has ruined a love so great.

And as years goes by, yes, Y/N and Jungkook are together, exchanging little smile here and there, a dull how are you at the end of the day instead of laughter and love. But Y/N knows, from the dying glint in his eyes whenever he looks at her that whatever they have is not love, never love. She stole away his love story, his one true love, hoping that she can be a greater one, a better one. But she was wrong. Dead wrong.

But is she the only one to blame? Jungkook fell in love too, didnt he? He betrayed their love too? Didnt he? Both hers and Rissa. So she guess they are both to blame. The dark storm in a beautifil love by a beautiful girl.

And for hurting her.

For making her cry.

For breaking her heart.

For making her loose the love of her life...

This is what Y/N deserve. To forever be with the man she loves, the man she long for everyday, the man she wants to love her back as much as she loves him, but he never will.... the man who will forever see her as.. the other girl.

[buffyromanoff]

A Month Without You

Warnings: Kind of angsty, kind of fluffy

Requests: ▪Hi! Idk if ur still taking requests (sorry if I’m too late) but would u be willing to do a nat x fem reader fic where they live together and had a fight and aren’t really speaking but nat finds out the reader is sick with a cold and decides to take care of her and forget the fight?

▪Hi! can i request fighting + making up with nat?

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You knew what you did was wrong, but apologizing to your girlfriend just wasn't enough this time. You and Nat always had small insignificant fights that you both forgot minutes after they ended, but when you decided to go on a mission that was so secretive that you couldn't even tell your girlfriend about, she wouldnt just forget about it in a few minutes.

Natasha had been crazy worried about you. She spend the entire month asking Fury if he knew anything about you and he obviously did, but he couldn't risk telling her anything without jeopardizing the whole thing so he acted like he didn't know anything at all.

Nat wasn't talking to anyone, not even to Bruce, Steve or Tony. She couldn't sleep for the entire month you were gone, thinking that you may have been taken away. She even escaped an Avengers mission to go look for you in Russia, interrogating some grudged old enemies and risking her own life to find you. But it was worthless. You were untraceable, and she would have been proud of your amazing spy abilities if you weren't using them with her.

You returned to your shared apartment around 3am. You opened the door without making any sound and headed to the bedroom to find an empty.

‘‘you better have a fucking great explanation’’.

You turned around to see your girlfriend. Her face was extremely serious and also angry but her eyes were red and puffy. She had been crying.

You walked towards her to wrap her in a tight hug but she walked away, leaving you hanging with both your arms open.

‘’It was a secret mission Nat, i was specifically told not to tell anyone about it, not even you’’. You were trying to explain your sudden disappearance.

‘’i thought you were dead, y/n. Do you know how terrifying was to live my life knowing you could be in mortal danger?’’. Her eyes started to water up and you tried to hold her hand but she hid them inside her pockets.

It hurted so much to see Nat like this. And the pain got even worse when you realized that the reason she was like that was because of you.

The talking turned to screaming and then crying. Deep inside, Nat knew that you had to do what you done, it's the nasty part of the job and sometimes the mission requires that kind of commitment.

‘’I've been alone for over a month, one more night isn't going to hurt more’’. Natasha grabbed her keys and slammed your apartment's door shut.

You were a mess, and not only emotionally. Your mission required you to be working under freezing temperatures and lack of sleep, not to mention being constantly stressed out so now that you were home and safe, your adrenaline dropped and all the symptoms started to manifest.

You wanted to run after her but your head was so heavy and you were exhausted so you decided to go directly to bed.

You opened your eyes the morning after but you couldn't get up. Your head felt like it was breaking in half your throat was like sandpaper.

Hours later, your bedroom was covered with used tissue and Nat was nowhere to be seen. You texted her but got no answer.

You slept the entire day and your symptoms were not going away.

Suddenly, you heard the front door opening.

‘’Nat? Is that you? ‘’. Your voice sounded raspy and stuffy.

She didn't answer and you heard the door opening and shutting again. She left, again.

You were a weeping mess. But then, the door opened again.

Natasha walked into your bedroom with a bag full of medicine and vegetables.

She placed her hand on your forehead. ‘’you're burning up’’. She pulled up the blankets to make sure you were warm enough.

Nat started to pick up all of the used tissues and came back from the kitchen with a glass of water and an ibuprofen.

‘’here, take this’’. Her tone was still cold and serious.

‘’Nat im so-’’.

‘’don't talk, just take this, you’ll feel better’’. She interrupted and you obeyed her. Minutes later you fell asleep.

You felt the mattress sink a bit on your side and when you opened your eyes, Natasha was there. She was sitting next to you holding a hot cup of tea she just made.

She handed it to you and you thanked her.

“y/n i'm sorry i left like that, i wasn't thinking straight and i was angry at you, and also at myself for not being able to find you and i just-”.She sighed. ”i was worried about you”.

“You don't have to apologize Nat, i'm the one who messed up, i should have sent you some secret message or something for you to-”. Your sentence was interrupted by a sneeze.

Nat stretched her arm and grabbed more tissue paper for you to clean your nose and gave you one of those soft smiles.

“You didn't do anything wrong, we both know what comes with this kind of job and sometimes when the mission is too urgent, there's no time for explanations, we know that”.

A tear streamed down your cheeks as you sipped the tea and Nat wiped them off.

“I missed you so much Nat”. You threw yourself on her with the little strength you had and gave her a hug. She held you tightly rubbing soft circles on your back. “i missed you too honey, so much”. She was crying. “And judging by your condition,you're not going anywhere for at least a week”. You both laughed. “And i'm going to stay here taking care of you until you're better”.

“But what about your job?”.You asked and then blew your nose.

“Oh don't worry, Fury owes me a big one after keeping you away from me for that long”.

Nat started moving her lips against yours. “I love you so much y/n , i would do anything for you, did you know that?”. You answered her by kissing her harder until you realized something”.

“Wait, i don't want you to get sick too”.

“When was the last time i got sick?”. She kissed you again and then you remembered that she has been enhanced by biotechnology, making her immune to diseases and stuff.

Nat ended up snuggled against you in bed, her fingers softly caressing your face until you fell back to sleep once again.

Hours later you woke up alone in bed, your now less stuffy nose could identify the delicious smell that came from your kitchen.

You stood up for the first time since she got here and followed the scent.

“Go back the bed baby, i'll bring you the soup, alright?”.

You walked towards her and hugged her from behind, resting your head on her back.

“but you're here! I'm going to miss you”.

“says the person who disappeared for over a month without even saying goodbye”. She teased.

“I said i was sorry!”.You pulled her even closer and she turned around to kiss you.

“I know, now go back to bed and i’ll meet you there in five minutes”

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I combined those request since they were similar, i hope its ok. Let me know if you liked it :)

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas : Shins-bro

Also on AO3!

TL;DR: Izuku and Shinso are best buds. Thats it. 

shinsou has a terrible mum and he's complaining about it "ironically"

like : "lmao my mum is gonna beat my ass for this shitty mark" and he's shocked when izuku is like 3 seconds away from tears

izuku drags shinso to his house and his mum is home and shinso is Spooked bc,, adult?? friends???

hes so scared that inkos gonna yell at him for doing something stupid but as soon as he walks in the door izuku trips over his own feet taking off his shoes and tackle hugs his mum

so izuku and inko are laughing and like, half-fallen over bc izuku is a chunky boy and shinso is so lost??? at the door and inko uses her quirk to pull him over by the shirt and join in the hug

udhihdsf she!!! picks both of them up and squishes these good heroes in the best mother hug

izuku is laughing and shinso is sh o o k bc this is the nicest hug he's ever had???

inko puts them both down and flushes a little, says sorry for hugging shinso but she hasn't seen her boy in so long! and he must be a lovely young man if he's friends with izuku

she bustles off to go stir dinner on the stove and izuku just grins and looks at shinso

"isn't my mum great?!"

",,,yeah"

he and shinso go to his room and izuku pulls out his old console

admits he used to make his mum play this fighting game over n over when he was little, and that she always used to pick this female hero with a big white cape because she liked her hair. he giggles and tells shinso that if he wants izuku can maybbbeee let him play allmight

he picks endeavour for a sec and asks shinso if je just wants to beat up endeavour for a minute before they really start

it turns into them setting like 6 AI to level 9 endeavours and them both playing allmight to beat the crap out of them

inko walks in w tea and little cakes she made and gasps happily bc she loved that game! so they restart the round with 2 allmights + 1 nana plus all the endeavour AI

izuku and shinso keep protecting inko's character from all the fire bc she doesn't deserve this

izuku shoves a cupcake into shinsou's mouth when he goes to ask izuku something

shinsou like, lights up bc he's never had home-baked stuff before and its sooooo good so he just kind melodramatic puts his controller down and says "i guess this is kamino ward 2.0" as all might gets crispy fried by the AI and shoves the cupcake into his face

izuku c a ck l e s

izuku and inko, melodramatically "we can't let allmight 1 fall!! protect him!!!" and they try to save this idle allmight as shinso watches w icing on his face

inko and izuku save idle allmight and shinso cheers softly. inko shoves a cupcake into hers and izuku's faces and hands another to shinso in celebration

she then ducks out to go take care of the dinner again. izuku giggles and puts dollop of icing on shinsos nose, who sneezes then looks offended that his nose dared to sneeze

shinso tries to lick the icing off he nose

but like

it's not working

and izuku is losing it laughing but shinso is stubborn and won't stop just bc what he's doing is v stupid. they end up w shinso's legs on izuku’s bed w his back on the floor, izuku leaning against the bed. shinso isn't really sure why he thought this was a good idea

and they run through English homework and shinso and izuku are both shockingly good and both refuse to admit its bc they spend too much time on tumblr/youtube

shinsou: gee izuku why are u so good at english

izuku, who has been reading self insert all might x reader fics for like 50% of his life: no reason :)))

fdguhdfghufh shinsou, who has been reading angsty fics of all his faves instead of going to therapy: wow same ,,,

also im sorry but, izuku def reads allmight self insert that isn't like "uwu dating you" but its like "what if allmight was ur best friend" or "allmight is your secret dad??? uwu"

u know all those old ass watt pad fics where one direction adopts u, that but all might and all the chapters are just

all might tucks u into bed after a hard school day and tells you he’s proud of you

all might fucking detroit smashes ur class bully into the concrete

u and all might attend the premiere of his latest docuseries and u cry bc there’s a whole preface abt how u changed his life for the better and he could not ask for a better child

izuku and shinso go through their old tumblr/wattpad/deviantart accounts and cry laugh

its all in terrible english and one of the comments is "are you 10 or can you just not speak english"

6 years later, izuku responds

"both, actually"

izuku writing vent fics but they’re like

“all might punches my classmate bc he stole my fuckign apple juice kacchan i hate u”

"all might tells me i don't need my fuckign dad i haven't seen since i was 4 and he becomes my new dad"

“all might tells me i have no bedtime and makes my mom dinner bc she’s stressed and she needs a nap”

"all might adopts me and marries my mum and has a kid who becomes my brother and best friend"

he wrote them all between 6-12 he started writing better shit when he was 12 and made a new account (better, not good.)

his first round of fics were like all in first person and shinsou’s w h e e z i n g like why’d u think this was a good idea. izuku s cryign bc hE WAS SIX HITOSHI STOP IT. its like really terrible english too

izuku is mad but then he realizes he was hitoshi's deviantart open and he g r i n s (its all shitty drawings of cats and his OC Hero ) there are like twenty pictures of his actual cat taken on a shoddy ds camera

also as like, a soft dumb thing izuku is like speed typing on his laptop and shinsou is like??

izuku shushes him n tells him he wants to finish it before dinner

what hes done

is he wrote one of the shitty self insert fics, intentionally shittily but w allmight as izukus dad and eraserhead and shinsous and they live together for no reason at the "hero apartments" and can be brothers

shinso is laughing and crying at the same time and izuku is like

",,,, im gonna send it to present mic"

"nO"

"do you think ill get extra credit?"

"nO DOnT DO IT"

izuku in retaliation sending in some of shinsou’s oldass oc comics and mics just

“i mean

it’s in english,,,”

they get extra credit but it's not really helpful bc they both had As now they both have A plus' but dont wan them

(mic sends it to all might and eraserhead but like, redacts shinso and izukus names and aizawa is twitching w either rage or laughter, all might is bright red and giggling like an idiot)

pls the teachers gc is just “all might and eraserhead tuck u in and call u a Good Boy” for the next three months

as a running joke, whenever they can, that's what izuku and shinso write for English

like in german we had to write plays and act out little skits in german. in english, they do that but like, izuku is eraserhead and shinso is a cat stuck in a tree 

they have to write sentences w different words? and they get "comfort" "rescue" and "light" and its all shit like

"my dad eraserhead rescued me from homework because mic is terrible"

"all might's fatherly love lights up the hole in my heart"

"the fatherly aura of allmight and eraserhead brings me comfort on my darkest days"

izuku gives the ol puppy dog eyes to aizawa who begrudgingly lets them sleep over at inko's house

and there is only one bed! and they cant decide who gets it

so

neither of them sleep in it and they both stubbornly lay on the floor. it takes like 5 seconds for them to start laughing