#i have mutuals who are and i don’t mind drawing it for them

[shewaslikeasunflower]

also pick a mother ship i should draw too!!

(will also draw some today before the poll ends tomorrow)

[maxillness]

Satisfy The Fans || LH44 x RB driver!Reader

Warnings: 18+, unprotected sex, angst (?), (implied) age gap, fake dating, drunken confession, mutual pining, slow burn,

Wordcount: 3.1k

From the start of her f1 career, she had always had a close relationship with Lewis, so the small pecks on the forehead she got from him wasn’t abnormal, but when it got caught by a paparazzi, it turned the whole internet towards them

Paddock affair: Hamilton and young driver

That was the days headline. She sat scrolling on her phone when she heard the bickering from the garage

She had yet to read it herself, but the small talks from behind her got her curious

“What are you whispering about back there?” She turned her head behind her to see Max, Christian and a few mechanics standing in a small circle

They all froze when they heard her voice. None of them answered, but it was clear they had heard her, so they couldn’t exactly ignore her

Christian was the one to speak up after he cleared his throat “Are you… Dating Hamilton?” He asked, hesitation obvious in his eyes

“What?” She was confused by his question “No. What makes you think that?” She asked with knitted eyebrows

He looked back into his phone and read aloud from it “Paddock affair: Hamilton and young driver. During the Australian qualifying sessions, Lewis Hamilton and Y/N Y/L/N was seeing kissing” He locked his phone and looked back up at her

“Huh?” She was even more confused “Did you get that from twitter? I’ve never kissed Lewis in my entire life” She explained “It was a peck on my forehead. He does it all the time” She shrugged

“So you’re telling me they’re lying?” He asked, crossing his arms over his chest

“Yes. Yes, I am” She chuckled, turning back to her phone “Don’t believe everything you reading on the internet, Christian. Especially if it’s on twitter”

After the race that Sunday, she came knocking on Lewis’ hotel door “You’ve read the rumours?” She pushed past him, not even bothering to greet him

“I have, yeah” He watched as she kicked off her shoes and threw her body onto the bed, messing up the sheets “Wine?”

“Do you have something stronger?” She asked, drawing out a chuckle from him

“Anything specific in mind?” He asked, watching her roll over on her stomach, her hair already a mess

“Anything above 25% and I’ll be happy” She sat up, leaning against the headboard as he found whatever alcohol he could

“We drink too much” She sighed as he came over with a bottle and two glasses

“Who cares?” He asked, sitting down on the bed with her

“Other than our livers, kidneys, and doctors, nobody” She said, watching her glass getting filled up with liquor

They sat for a few hours, drinking and talking, feeling the alcohol really start to kick in as they neared midnight

“What if we actually dated?” He asked, earning a pair of raised eyebrows from her “I’m not suggesting we date, I’m just saying, what do you think the internet would be like if we actually dated?”

“They wouldn’t get out of our faces, I think” She said, emptying her glass down her throat, too used to it to feel the burn

He just looked at her as she pouted from the empty glass “You want to, don’t you?” She asked, seeing the glint in his eye when she looked back at him

“We both know we don’t have feelings for each other, but it would be fun to see, Y’know?” He said, switching their glasses so she had his filled one and his were empty

“You know what? Let’s fake date, Lew” She took out her hand like they were making a deal

“Get that hand away” He slapped her hand away with a laugh on his lips

“Imagine all the fans were gonna satisfy” She said, another empty glass in her hands

For the next race, they had both informed their PR managers, but no one else, and they made sure to be seen as much as possible out in public together, as well as in the paddock

They arrived together at the paddock, talk in between practice sessions, and whenever it was possible to get some free time

Saturday after qualifying, they took a stroll down the city. They hadn’t realised the time, and they had stayed out until late

It was getting dark and cold in the streets, but it was too beautiful to go back to the hotel. They walked a few steps before Lewis stopped in his tracks

“What?” She turned around, looking up at him

“Let’s satisfy the fans, no?” She didn’t get to answer before he had pulled her body into his, holding her face with one hand as the other were on her waist, kissing her lips soft

She was too startled to kiss back, yet her hands were placed softly on his waist. He pulled back slightly, looking at her surprised expression

“There’s a paparazzi across the street. Wanna make it believable, right?” He smiled as he surprised state faded into a friendly smile

“Idiot” She slapped his chest softly before she were able to get out of his grip and started walking again

“You told us you weren’t dating” Max came bursting into her drivers room without knocking, making her yelp slightly

“Jeez, ever heard about knocking?” He just stood there silently “Anyway… What are you talking about?”

She watched as he took out his phone, typing at it. She took the phone from him when he handed it too her

She was met by the image of her and Lewis the day before, standing in each others arms kissing

“Oh, yeah. That was taken yesterday, Max” She explained, handing him his phone back “So what I told you was technically the truth”

“So you are dating?” He asked surprised

“Yes. Yes, we are” She said, standing up from the couch, walking past him to get out into the garage again

“Uh-uh. We aren’t done here” He said, following behind her like a lost puppy

“Since when did you start caring about my love life?” She sighed, walking over to her side

“Since it evolved the rival” He whispered, pulling her out to the said

“Look, Max, it’s not like I’m gonna bring it on to the track. People can have separate relationships on and off the track. Do you trust me to make this work?” He nodded but not without hesitation “Thank you”

Soon enough, all the drivers had heard about their ‘relationship’, as well as the team principals

“Y/N, how did your relationship with Lewis start?” She hadn’t thought about the interviews when they made their agreement

“Well, we’ve always had a close relationship as friends, and I guess that we slowly realised our feelings for each other the more time we spend with each other” She explained, coming up with a lie as quick as she could

“That’s actually quite sweet” The interviewer smiled “How are you handling all the hate?”

“We’re both handling it fine. I think people should get love who they love despite their age gap, as long as it’s a reasonable range, of course” She said, fiddling with her fingers

“Alright, thank you, Y/N” She walked away after a quick goodbye

“You okay?” Lewis had grabbed her attention before she had fully stomped off

“‘M fine” Her voice was telling the absolute opposite

“Come here” He pulled her body close into a hug, his lips meeting the top of her head, soothing her back down to earth

“Thank you, Lew” She pulled away and walked towards her crew who led her back to her drivers room

“Can we get back to the interview, Lewis?” The interviewer asked as his eyes still lingered on her body walking away

“Of course, sorry” He said, turning his head back to the person in front of him

“It’s quite alright. You two are very cute together” She said, making Lewis smile the slightest “Now, how did this begin- the relationship between you two?”

“We’ve always been close friends, and I guess the more we hung out and knew each other, our feeling for each other became more than friendly” The only thoughts in his head at the moment; what would it be like to actually date her?

Their act has been going on for half a year now, and it was going good, she still got startled when he kissed her after seeing a paparazzi and she didn’t. She would never get used to the feeling of his lips against hers

They were in her hotel room, sharing a bottle of whatever liquor they had, talking about everything and nothing

After about half an hour, he called it quits and said he had to go to sleep, so he went back to his own room a floor under her

As soon as he had closed the hotel door to her room, she took her phone out, typing up Max’ name

Can you come in here? I need your help with sm

Give me 2

About those two minutes went by before she heard the knock on her door “Thank god” She said relived as he stepped into the room

“What do you need help with?” He asked, sensing the worries in her body language

“Lewis” She watched as he knitted his eye brows together “I don’t know if he loves me” She had started to feel the changes a month after they started ‘dating’

He had become more caring, more sweet, more like a boyfriend than the friend she used to have

“What do you mean? Of course he does” He said, sitting down on the edge of the bed “I’ve seen the way he looks at you”

“Yeah, but that’s all an act. He doesn’t love me like I love him” Max became even more confused by her words

“All an act? What?” His face was pure confusion

“Me and Lewis never dated, not really anyways” She sighed, sitting down on the bed as well

“We fake dated to see what would happen” She said once she saw his expression

“Okay” He nodded slightly “So what makes you think he doesn’t have feelings for you?” He asked, wanting to help her

“The day we started ‘dating’, he said ‘we both know we don’t have feelings for each other’, and I get that, we’re good friends. I don’t think he ever would have feelings for me” She explained, feelings her throat almost close up

“I’m positive he doesn’t have feelings for me, Max” He sighed hearing her words

“Wait, so you’re telling me you two never dated?” George was as confused as Max had been just a minute ago

“Did any other words come out of my mouth?” Lewis asked, tone full of sarcasm

“Wow, getting sassy early” George said, raising his eyebrows at his teammate

“I’m sorry, I just don’t know what to do. She obviously doesn’t have feeling for me” He slumped down on the couch, the air coming out in a huff

“You could just talk to her, tell her how it is” George shrugged, trying to help his teammate

“And risk loosing our friendship? No thank you. Rather live like this than without her” Lewis explained, thinking of all the bad things that could happen if he told her

She just wished she could tell him

He just wished he could tell her

Abu Dhabi rolled around, and she had going at it with the partying for a while before she had headed to bed

Around 1:30am, she heard a knock on the door that startled her awake. Now that she was awake, she could just answer the door

“Lewis?” Her eyes was still blurry from the fact she still wasn’t fully awake

“Can I come in?” His words were slurred, very obviously drunk

She sighed as she took in the state of him “Sure, baby” The pet names was something they had agreed on was okay, and they were used so much in public it had gotten into their private lives as well

She closed the door behind him as he took a few steps in. She barely got to turn around before he was spilling words at her

“I love you. I love you so, so much. I have loved you since we started dating, and I can’t keep it in anymore” He had taken her face into his hands

“Lewis-“ “Just let me love you” He had pulled her face into his kiss her softly. She put her hands on his chest, pushing him away

“You’re drunk, Lewis. You don’t know what you’re saying” She said, taking his hands away from her face, pulling them down to rest at his side

“What is it that they say? ‘Drunk words are sober thoughts’” He said, taking a step closer to her

“Lewis, you’re too drunk to be allowed to speak. Will you just go to bed?” She asked, letting him take that step forward

“Will you join me?” He asked, obvious hurt in his eyes

“Do you promise to sleep?” He nodded, not daring to speak “Then I will” She sighed, starting to guide him over to the bed

He got out of his jeans before she got him under the covers. She laid down beside his already dozing off body

He scooted closer to her, curling his body into her arms, sighing at the feeling of her warm body

As he woke up, she wasn’t in bed

“Morning” She said, handing him a glass of water and a two painkillers of some kind

He sat up right, taking the glass and pills “What would I do without you. I love you” He swallowed the pills before taking a sip of the water

“I know. You already said that today” She said, sitting back down on the bed

“What? When?” He was confused, remembering nothing of the sort

“Around 1:30 after you woke me up” She explained

“Oh my god. I am so sorry, really, I am” He looked away from her

“Lew, it’s fine-“ “No, it’s not. I’m really sor-“ He was silenced when she had forced his head towards her and had connected their lips

“I love you too, Lewis” She had pulled slightly back, seeing his pupils darken, taking the brown in them away

“You do?” He asked softly, almost like his words got stuck in his throat “Like, you *really* do?” A smile formed in the corner of his mouth as he put the glass onto the nightstand

She kissed him again, proving her point. He groaned into the kiss as it got more sloppy and heated

He had gotten her pinned down to the bed, lips going from her mouth and down her neck, leaving a few lovebites behind as he moved to the other side of her neck

“Lew, please” She whined, bucked her hips up into his, trying to get more friction

He scooted down the bed, his lips landing on the insides of her bare thighs. His fingers hooked into the waist band of her shorts, pulling them down

She whined as his lips made their way back to her inner thighs, leaving marks behind

“Please, Lewis. I need you so bad” Her breath stuttered as he pulled her panties down slowly, his fingers ghosting her skin

He wasted no time to draw his tongue through her wet folds the moment her panties were removed

“Fuck, Lew” She bucked her hips into his mouth, gripping the sheets beneath her harshly

She moaned loud when his tongue settled on her clit, putting pleasurable pressure on it

“Lewis, please” She arched her back off of the bed, her knuckles turning white from the grip in the sheets

Two of his fingers teased her entrance, making her whine as his tongue started flicking her clit, making her moan loud

He slowly started setting a pace with his fingers, curling them every now and then, hitting the spot inside her that made her body shake

“Lewis, please. Don’t stop- fuck, feels so good” Her words were slurred as she neared her orgasm, clenching rapidly around his fingers

“Fuck, Lew- ‘M gonna come, please” He sped up his fingers, curling them every time, sending her over the edge

She came with cry of his name, her whole body shaking, her chest rising and falling at a rapid speed

He kissed the insides of her thighs, soothing her out of her orgasm “Please, Lew… I need…” She still had trouble speaking from her orgasm

“I know. Don’t worry. I’m right here” He got off of the bed. He quickly removed his clothes and got back on the bed between her legs

She put her legs around his hips, pushing further against her as he started prepping small kisses to her neck and throat

He slowly entered her, drawing out moans from both of them. He stilled his hips, letting her adjust to him before he started moving

“Move, please” Her hands were all over the skin she could reach before settling at his back as he started moving

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby” He whimpered as her nails dug into his back, scraping along his skin

He angled her hips in a way that made him it hit that perfect spot inside her that made her moan loud

“Fuck, right there, Lew- fuck” He sped up, making sure to hit the same spot over and over again

“‘M so close- fuck, baby” The way she was rapidly clenching around him drew him closer to the edge

The next room over could probably hear their skin against skin sounds as well as their mixed moans

“Fuck, you clench so good ‘round me, love” He leaned down and prepped kisses above her breast

“Baby, please-“ She didn’t even know what she was pleading for, but she knew she could feel him getting close as well as he was twitching inside her

“Mhm, right behind you, baby” She took the cue and within a couple of thrusts, her body shook yet again with his name rolling off her tongue

And as promised, he was right behind her, stilling his hips as he came inside her with a moan

He slowed down his hips, circling her hipbone with his thumbs as she came down from her high

He pulled out of her, drawing a whine from both of them at the loss of contact between the two of them

They both sat in the bathtub, her back against his chest, his hands rubbing her thighs as she was slowly drifting away into a sleep

“Will you be my girlfriend?” They way his lips felt against her cheekbone woke her up

She turned her head to face him “Yes. Yes, I will” She smiled, pulling his face into a soft kiss

[shibaraki]

THE VANISHING MOON ┊ TSUKISHIMA KEI

tags: GN reader, post timeskip, exes to lovers, fluff, emotional hurt + comfort, reader is a writer, alcohol consumption, mutual pining, getting back together, kisses, weddings, previous ‘mutual’ breakup, happy ending

wc: 4.2K

For as long as you can remember, you’ve loved love stories.

The first time you picked up a pen with the intention to write you’d been looking for a specific someone. To pour love into and be loved by. Conjured from the recesses of your mind, a soft smile from the boy you liked, one prepared to whisk you away from the converging angst that came with your adolescence.

In later years you looked inward, searching for yourself. To satiate your loneliness through self introspection. Ink blotted fingers working arduously at the knots that make up the soul. Knots that were once straight rope, simple and without weak points. And when you failed to love yourself you turned outward, exploring the web that made up the world.

You saw that other people loved stories, too. That there would always be at least one which speaks to them in some way and stays with them. You coveted that reality; to be something another person could love, and look back on with fondness. For your words to strike such a chord that they’d become part of another’s tapestry. To live on. Never again be forgotten, even if it means being an echo of something.

That yearning accompanies you up the cobbled footpath. The crisp air pinching the tips of your ears. Soft, muted chirps rippled throughout the treeline. “Wow,” you murmur, breathless. Arms sticky with perspiration, leg muscles tingling in exertion after walking the steep hill.

The reception venue sits on the end of a private road, concealed by threadbare canopy. Under an open sky there lay every shade and stroke of colour. Dappled sunlight casts shadows across the grass and your eyes are drawn to them.

“Wow is right. They’ve done an incredible job,” Sugawara airs his appreciation as he walks at your side. His voice is awed, and his cheeks are red. “I can’t believe they managed it. Karumai Gardens are notoriously stingy for booking events”.

The wedding invitation shouldn’t have come as a surprise. Remaining some of your closest friends, Kiyoko and Tanaka had already confirmed your attendance long before the formal invites were sent out. You even found yourself on the end of multiple phone calls over the months assisting a panicked Tanaka with writing and rewriting his vows.

Despite that, your stomach roiled at the invitation on your kitchen counter, and your heart crawled up into your throat. Because suddenly it was too real.

Everybody would be there.

Tsukishima would be there.

You’ve been a high strung for most of the day, hyper vigilant to the point of fraying. The ceremony was beautiful. Kiyoko looked ethereal draped in her white lace gown, a delicate veil cascading down her back and rippling down the aisle as she walked. Tanaka was striking in his dark blue suit and embroidered waistcoat. Sitting at the forefront, you remained steadfast in your ignorance of Tsukishima’s scrunity and dabbed at your face as you cried.

You missed having his attention. Missed the subtle stroke of his sharp gold eyes across every part of you as though it were Tsukishima’s hands themselves. A scant, cowardly part of you considered not attending the reception, grateful that he hadn’t approached you yet. If he would at all. Kei could be unbearably prideful about these things. But what do you know?

Nothing. After all this time you probably know nothing at all.

“I think he wants to talk to you,” Sugawara says, drawing your focus to the present. “It’s obvious he’s missed you”.

You edge past the increasingly dense foliage with intent, your fingertips outstretched to brush the near-blooming plants. “Who?” you ask. Sugawara’s grin turns wry and he threads his arm through yours.

“So petty,” he murmurs, patting your bicep. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. But he’s single, and has been staring at you all day. I thought I should mention it”.

“Well you’ve mentioned it,” you return without true malice, squeezing him back. Sugawara’s lips parted in a sigh, and for a brief second, you saw a wistful expression beneath the lighthearted veneer. It stirs unease in your chest and you add, “I just don’t want to make a scene”.

“You really think that’s what it’ll come to?”

Memories unearthed from the deep recesses of your mind. Packed away into tight spaces and left to collect dust where they can’t hurt you. They awaken easily, triggered by a simple question, and with such clarity that you wonder if you ever forgot them at all.

Soft, deliberate touches. Long, warm embraces, swallowed up by his large frame. Graceless laughter—the ugly kind that makes your stomach hurt. Languorous kisses, biting kisses, chaste kisses, clumsy kisses. Good morning and good night kisses. Bickering over breakfast. Bickering over dinner. Wandering, calloused hands. Pressure behind two fingers, splitting you like soft fruit. A sharp tongue and sharper words. Holding hands in bed, anchoring yourself to him like you were afraid he might float away in the night.

Life became busier than either of you expected. Kei landed an opportunity to play for a division two team in the V league alongside his work at the Sendai city museum. Your publisher's demands increased. Kei’s priorities shifted. Resentment crept in. He started to forget things. Small promises and favours, like getting the grocery’s or making it home for date night. They felt so significant at the time—things you deemed indicative of his commitment to you, without communicating as such.

Fractures formed in your relationship. You ignored them in favour of keeping the peace, hoping to address them when the timing was better. Only with hindsight can you say that was the wrong choice. The fractures contracted, expanded until it grew into a yawning cavity with one of you standing either side of it. A slow decay.

“No. No, it wouldn’t,” you tell Sugawara. Tsukishima has never been a shining paragon of virtue but he wouldn't do anything to disrupt Tanaka’s wedding. “I’m just nervous. I haven’t seen him since…”

Sugawara hums his acknowledgment. You’re adrift as he guides you into the venue holding the wedding reception, welcomed into a kaleidoscope of colour. Carefully crafted floral arrangements line the hall. Half of the building is a greenhouse conversion, and natural light filters in through the high, arching ceilings, illuminating the dance floor. You take in the surroundings as your senses are enveloped by the pleasant din.

“Look, there’s Yachi and Nishinoya,” Sugawara tugs on your arm and calls out, “Yachi! Noya!”

Nishinoya crowed, leaping forward to gather you and Sugawara into a blistering hug. Barely two extra inches on him yet larger than you remember, skin kissed by the sun and his hair handsomely coiffed. His waistcoat creases awkwardly with the stretch of his body while you sink into his warmth and feel your cheeks ache.

“Man, I feel like I could scale a mountain! It’s so good to see you guys again,” Nishinoya reclines to get a look at you both and firmly takes you by the shoulders. “You have a lot to answer for,” he says with mock seriousness.

“I do?” you laugh, skull knocking side to side as he shakes you.

“I read your book on the plane”.

Your laughter putters out. You grimace and clear your throat, “Oh—really?”

“Most of us have. We wanted to support you properly,” Yachi admits as she steps forward to hug you. She’s smiling when she pulls away, faint laughter lines deepening.

Sugawara nods and pokes at your waist, “Don’t look so embarrassed. It was amazing”.

“It made me cry!” Nishinoya effuses. He sniffs, and to your mortification he looks like he might burst into tears again. “There was this one line—gah, no! I can’t talk about it. Get over here, I need to hug you again”.

“Thank you, Noya-san,” you wheeze at the arms constricting around your midsection, eyes clenched shut to repress the impending sting. You turn your head, nose knocking against his temple as you peer at the others. “Thank you all. I mean it”.

Yachi squirms, her smile quivering. “I’m really happy you made it today,” she says once you’ve been released. The unyielding pressure of Nishinoya’s embrace lingers like two phantom limbs. “You too, Nishinoya-san”.

“It’s amazing you’re upright. I thought for sure the jet lag would get to you,” Sugawara laughs. He utters a quick apology to the server passing with a tray of drinks. “Didn’t you fly in from Barcelona?”

“Yeah. Should’a been heading to Andorra but I wouldn’t miss my bro’s wedding for the world,” Nishinoya’s voice drifts as his eyes follow the alcohol. He plucks a glass in one swift motion and holds it high, “Salut I força al canut!”

Yachi watches him throw back the drink with poorly veiled anxiety. “Ah, speaking of, we should find our seats. It looks like the cake cutting is starting soon”.

“Good call. We’re getting in the way of the preparations. And I think you’ve left Asahi alone for too long,” Sugawara claps Nishinoya on the shoulder. “Looks like he’s been accosted by Saeko-san”.

Nishinoya pivots on his heel, whip-like and buzzing. You’re not sure which name he reacted to more. Asahi or Saeko. “Where?” his gaze locks in on the pair across the room. “I’ll talk to you guys in a bit!”

Gone in a blink. “He never slows down,” Sugawara sighs, shaking his head fondly. “Guess that’s my cue,” he says before parting ways. Yachi waves after them.

An idea strikes you then. “Say, Yacchan. You’re next to me, right?” you glance toward the long tables set up around the dance floor and meet her gaze with a suggestive smile. “Would you want to sit next to Yamaguchi instead? I don’t mind swapping”.

Their relationship had blossomed over the past few months. A long, slow burn finally come to fruition, new enough that mention of it usually makes her turn pink. But the light in her eyes dims at your suggestion, and rather than flustered, Yachi looks uncertain.

Her fingers form a loose clasp around your forearm. “Tadashi is seated next to Tsukishima,” she explains gingerly. You feel yourself freeze and the kind motion of her thumb strokes circles along the inside of your wrist.

You let out a shaky exhale. “That’s okay. I don’t mind,” you tell her before the consequences of what you’re offering can really be cemented. Yachi’s eyes widen, her grip tighter on your hand as you squeeze back in an attempt at reassurance, knowing your smile looks brittle. “It’s probably for the best. We haven’t… talked yet”.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure”.

“Are you sure you’re sure?”

“Hitoka,” you laugh, bumping your shoulders together. “I promise I’ll survive”.

You regret it not two minutes later.

Anticipation fizzes under your skin as you spot him. On approach you give him a cursory look over, the harsh beat of your heart ricocheting in your chest. Tsukishima looks good—he always does, but today, dressed in his dark, double breasted suit, with the golden hour light carding fingers through his neatly styled hair, you think he’s never looked better.

It is disconcerting to see him again and realise that your feelings haven’t changed much in the slightest.

You sit in the chair beside him. You see his spine draw taut in the corner of your eye and feel an oscillating loneliness; so alike those final few weeks together that cold dread seeps between the spaces in your ribs and steals your breath.

“Tsukishima,” you incline your head, impersonal and cautious, hating how foreign his surname is on your tongue.

A beat passes before he repeats your name in greeting, soft as a psalm despite the dour expression on his face. You’re overcome with the urge to poke the uncomfortable crease in his brow. To smooth it out and kiss the skin there, the way you used to do.

You shift in your seat. The arms curve around your midsection and knock against your elbows as you fiddle with the table cloth, “I told Yacchan that Yamaguchi could have my seat so they can sit together. I hope that’s alright”.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” and you know the clipped answer is reflexive by the way his jaw locks in frustration at himself. Bracing for what you’ll say next.

Only, your mouth curls up a little, and you exhale a short laugh through your nose. You haven’t seen him this skittish since your first year of highschool. You consider that maybe you aren’t the only one who’s scared. That things are the same and they are not the same. The thought is bittersweet, but it’s nice, the way his trepidation gives way to muted awe, how he sends you sidelong glances when he thinks you’re not looking.

The music picks up in a grand crescendo as the newlyweds enter the hall and the reception begins with a raucous applause. A rich aroma unfurls as the food is served, the depth of the flavour layering over the already present notes of wildflower and honey. Drinks are handed to the guests. Generously. You swirl the liquid gold around the rim of your glass, luxuriating in the syrupy inebriation of a gently oaked chardonnay.

“So, uh. How’ve you been?”

Tsukishima, to his credit, does not startle at the question. “Fine,” he says, and you think he might leave it at that when he adds, “The museum received another new Crinoid collection last month, so I’ve been preoccupied”.

You grasp at the conversational thread, not wanting him to stop, “Crinoids?”

“Marine animals. They still exist today, though not as common. You might’ve heard of sea lilies and feather stars,” he shrugs halfheartedly, not daring to look away from his deep fried tofu, though it’s clear he can’t help talking about his work with pride. “Ours are from the Triassic period”.

“Just like the, uh—” you click your fingers to conjure the name from thin air “—Gojirasaurus! Your favourite, right?”

Tsukishima pauses. It’s a fleeting thing, but you notice. The corner of his lips curves into a barely-there smile. He seems pleased that you remembered. You busy your hands with repositioning the cutlery a fourth time so maybe, hopefully, you can distract yourself enough not to say something stupid like: “If I visit, will you show it to me?” or “Do you miss me, like I miss you?”

You clear your throat. “I hear the Sendai Frogs have been doing well, too. Congratulations on moving up to division one”.

Those aureate eyes are sliding to you again, bright and searching. Tsukishima arches his brow in a delicate mocking gesture that was unbearable when he was sixteen and even more so now. “Keeping tabs on me, are you?”

There’s mirth trickling into his voice, giving it a familiar smarmy lilt. A wave of emotion washes over you. Embarrassment and heart-twisting-happiness. You shove some rice into your mouth and chew it down to fine paste, vying for time to formulate a coherent sentence. “No. I read about it in the latest Volleyworld issue,” you reply unconvincingly.

“You don’t read Volleyworld”.

“How would you know that?”

Tsukishima takes a shallow breath and nods. The warm gloam of late afternoon mellows his taut features. “I’ve been reading too,” he says after another sip of wine. “I saw you finally published your book”.

Dread seized the inner workings of your mind and the apology on the tip of your tongue curdles. Time ticks by, one sickening second after another. Your eyes dip low to avoid his gaze—which for some reason, he refused to direct anywhere else.

Your recollection of the break up itself was hazy at best. There had been no raised voices, no desperate movie-esque kiss, no slammed doors. Only grief filling your body like lead, and jumbled, half-hysterical thoughts of ‘Is this it? Are we giving everything up, just like that?’

You remember everything that followed, though. The inability to accept reality. It is said if a writer falls in love, that love can never die. And so you kept writing, and writing, and writing; perceiving love through different lenses, creating different endings; relying on metaphors of natural forces and disasters, of cannibalism and gluttony, of journeys and patience to make sense of it all. Six months after everything fell apart you completed the final draft of ‘The Vanishing Moon’, dedicating a final testimony to him in small print on the first page.

Given the choice, I would’ve rather had you at my side than any one of these words.

Has he seen it? Is that what he’s getting at? Did he read through all eighteen chapters and meticulously pick out the remnants of him you pressed between the pages?

“Noya said it made him cry,” you eventually reply.

Tsukishima signals for another drink. He takes two flutes from the server, handing one to you. You accept it with a soft ‘thanks’, hoping he didn’t notice the tremor in your fingers. “Nishinoya-san cried when he found out swans can be gay,” he points out.

“You cried at The Land Before Time”.

“What kind of cold hearted bastard doesn’t cry at The Land Before Time?”

Laughter bubbles up in your chest as the initial dread ebbs away and the tension seeps from your shoulders. Tsukishima dips his chin, a small smile as he mutters, “That’s better”.

In the centre of the hall Tanaka cradles Kiyoko in his arms, now surrounded by clusters of their loved ones whirling with their own partners, a hurricane of colour and laughter and love. Tsukishima observes them with a solemn gleam in his eye. That could’ve been us, his heart says in chorus with your own.

“Do you remember that time we danced together in third year, at the summer festival? I tried to kiss you and gave you a nosebleed”.

“I remember”.

Your gaze drops to the bottom of your glass. At the time you had been mortified. Now it’s a story you would share at your own wedding table. The thought cleaves your heart in half.

“Do you remember the song that was playing?”

“Why are you bringing this up?” Tsukishima snaps. “Yes, I remember everything. I couldn’t forget even if I wanted to. Happy?”

There’s a surge of something devastating in your chest, like love and heartbreak all at once, strong enough that you feel as if your ribs might splinter just to make room for it. But they don’t—and you don’t, because you’ve felt this before, and your body remembers.

You remember.

Suddenly the room is too hot, and the music is too loud. “Sorry. I’ll be back in a minute,” you murmur, pushing your chair back and getting to your feet.

“Wait,” in one short breath there are long, calloused fingers circling your wrist. You do wait. Tsukishima hesitates, the pressure elevates, and as you lean away your palm slips into his, skin kissing skin. Then he’s standing, towering over you. “I’ll come with you. I know a place that’s quiet”.

Tsukishima does not let go of your hand, and you don’t let go of his. He walks a few steps ahead guiding you through the throngs of people. Some familiar heads turn, their attention drawn immediately to the place where your bodies meet, and shooting you various looks of encouragement or confusion. Yamaguchi sees you pass and his mouth splits into a grin so wide that his eyes crinkle.

You’re not sure where it is he’s taking you, only that his promise of finding quiet is true. The cacophony simmers and soon enough the festivities are muffled entirely. Just when you think you’ve wound up at the end of a corridor it curves, leading to a pair of french doors. “Come on,” Tsukishima ushers you out onto a balcony.

What you’re greeted by makes your breath catch. The world as it is around you comes to a standstill, the fabric of reality peeling away. An orange yolk dips below the horizon and the sunset hour drapes across the ostensibly endless meadow hidden behind the Karumai Gardens. Rolls of grass sway in the wind, peppered with wildflowers of every shade.

You move to stand at the balcony’s edge. Tsukishima drops his hand, and your fingers curl into your palm. The shadows grow longer, the air cooler. The evening insects begin to sing. You’re warmed still by the wine thrumming in your bloodstream.

“Hey, Tsukki?”

He comes to stand beside you, folding his arms atop the wall. “Don’t call me that”.

“Oh,” you swallow against the swell in your throat. “Sorry, Tsukishima”.

Tsukishima’s expression twists into a scowl. There’s a blush creeping toward his ears. “I didn’t mean that,” he says. You blink and wait for him to elaborate, which only flusters him further. He stares stubbornly at the border. “Just—call me as you normally would. Anything else sounds wrong in your mouth”.

The name leaves you in an instant. Hushed—not whispered, “…Kei”.

He makes an inquisitive noise, strangled as it is.

“You didn’t say what you thought of it,” you continued. “My book”.

You feel a rush of adrenaline when Kei doesn't answer immediately, unable to read his expression. “Good,” he says, veiled indifference belied by the restless twisting of a cufflink between his forefinger and thumb. “It was good”.

“Well, that’s practically a Pulitzer recommendation coming from you”.

“Shut up,” he huffed, gaze flitting across your face and dropping to your tentative, uncertain beginning of a smile. He wets his lips and glances away. Heartened, both by the alcohol and his reciprocation, you press closer in small increments, and Kei flowers under your gentle persuasion, like he always used to.

“This okay?”

In lieu of a reply you are ensconced by a warm, firm chest and two strong arms around your back that show no sign of withdrawing. The low timbre of his voice vibrates under your cheek, “Who was it for?”

“Hm?”

“The book. You dedicated it to someone”.

You exhale, squeezing your eyes shut. You’re glad, in part, that he can’t see the emotion written plainly on your face. “Nobody,” you answer lightly, angling to position your ear right over his beating heart. “Just an ex. You don’t know him”.

“Right,” Kei says, drawing out the ‘l’ the way he does when conceding a point he knows he’s correct about. It sounds so fond that you want to curl up where you’re resting, like some benevolent cat. “Guy must’ve been a dick”.

“I was too. We made a lot of mistakes, I think,” you say. If nothing came of this you would at least be able to revisit it; to pick at the scab and stop the wound from closing over too soon. There’s comfort in that. You crane your head and meet his gaze, nervous but unwavering. “But even if he was kind of a dick, I miss him a lot”.

“Yeah?” his eyes soften, half lidded and dark. “He misses you too”.

“He told you that, did he?” your mouth trembles. Kei dips to bring your foreheads together, and the hard frame of his glasses bumps your eyebrow. You share a shaky exhale of laughter.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters, brow pinched with regret. Again, “I’m sorry. I know I fucked up”.

You feel your jaw quiver. The familiar burn behind your eyes. Tears so close you can taste them. “We both did. Don’t shoulder the blame on your own”.

“But I made you feel lonely,” he says.

You tuck your chin and whisper, “Yes”.

His fingers splayed across your cheek, pinky tucked beneath your jaw as he cradled your face in his hand, tilting until you’re staring back at the reflection in his pupils. Puffy and damp, eyelashes clumped with tears. What a sight.

Kei strokes his thumb in an arc beneath your eye. A tear beads on his nail, slipping into the crook of his hand. The inexpressible tenderness is overwhelming yet you are underwhelmed by the inaction. You can’t find it in yourself to be embarrassed by the whine in your voice as you ask, “Are you going to kiss me?”

“Demanding as ever. What happened to ‘please’?” he murmurs. And then he kisses you.

It is slow at first, hesitant, leaving room for you to pull away. But with every languid movement of Kei’s lips came a sweet affirmation, that which you took and took until you no longer felt unworthy of receiving it. His hand flutters at your waist. You take a shuddered breath, pressing closer into his embrace and deepening the kiss. In his distraction you take him by the wrist, encouraging him to touch. There’s an immediate, reverent grip at your hip, kneading over your clothes.

This is what you’d been longing for. The feeling you couldn’t transpose; that which people have long tried to capture. The esoteric, giddy anticipation and joy that bubbled between two people on the precipice of something bigger than themselves. Even with an affinity for stringing words together you are scarcely able to describe it. Immense and overwhelming, light and dark, tender and everything in between.

Kei pulls away for breath with a low, vibrating hum, wearing a smile that you thought you’d never see outside of your memories. Almost boyish when he looks at you. The distance is an inch too many but it is just that—an inch. “Eager,” he teases, only to kiss you again, twice as eager.

For as long as you can remember, you’ve loved love stories.

But love doesn’t only exist in stories.

You remember that, now.

[lnfours]

* ✰. — supernatural | l.n

summary: this love’s possessing me, but i don’t mind at all ; a new year with the same boy, but in a different way.

warnings: fluff, another friends to lovers!au brought to you by yours truly, based off ‘supernatural’ by ariana grande, pining so damn hard, a hint of language, not proofread bc i can’t sleep and i have this on my mind

masterlist | listen

✧˖°.🪐⋆｡°✩

you weren’t really sure when things changed with lando. how the once platonic touches turned into lingering ones that left a fire burning beneath his fingertips. how quick glances turned into longing stares before the other would notice and a quick shift of vision. everything suddenly meant something.

of course, everyone had put money on it years ago. they all had a gut feeling that at some point, things would come clear to the both of you that you were meant to be all along. how all those past relationships, situationships and failed first dates never worked out because no one could compare. and as always, the two of you would always shut it down. quick to reassure your other friends that if it ever were to happen, it’d ruin a life long friendship which was far more important.

they didn’t want to hear it though. always giving a slight nod, a ‘sure’ or a ‘we’ll see about that’. and boy were they right. they were onto the both of you before you even started. assumptions slowly coming to life as they all watched how the two of you acted around the other all of a sudden. how he’d always have an arm around you, not in a protective way, but in a ‘i need you right here with me’ kind of way. they all noticed how you never backed away, how you’d simply melt into him as the night progressed. your head leaning back on his shoulder as you talked. or how you would slip a hand around his back, occasionally drawing shapes onto the thin material of his shirts. a simple giveaway to them about something you didn’t even know was happening yet.

but now it was new years, the house party buzzing with people and music and everything in between. a celebration of the end of another year and into a new one with new beginnings. manifestations of good things in the air as the music played through the speakers of the house.

you were sat on the couch, drink in hand as you laughed with some of your mutual friends. lando couldn’t help but keep glancing over at you, eyes dancing over the way your eyes sparkled in the dim lighting. how your eyes creased when you laughed and smiled, how suddenly you were all he could see in a room full of people.

“mate,” max’s voice brought him back to earth, “did you hear what i said or were you too busy eye-fucking y/n?”

lando turned to his best friend, eyebrows pulled together, “what?”

he was trying not to get defensive. trying so hard not to tell his best friend that he wasn’t eye-fucking you, but rather looking over at you lovingly. looking at you as his heart went a mile a minute, scanning over all the features of your face for the millionth time, but all of a sudden taking this time, right here, right now, to try to memorize it. memorize everything little thing that made you perfect to him.

“c’mon, mate,” max sighed, almost as if he was tired of the same story, “you’ve been staring at her for the past five minutes. when are you going to go tell her you love her?”

lando swallowed the sip of his drink, rolling his eyes at his friend, “i don’t know what you’re on about.”

“please,” pietra joined the conversation now, arm linked on max’s, “you’re a terrible liar. you both are.”

he looked at the blonde with curiosity in his eyes. you both are? what was that supposed to mean? could it be-

he was about to ask before she spoke, “listen, you’re both single. clearly you’re into each other, just go talk to her!”

and with that, the couple was gone. off to join the circle of people in the living room who were counting down to midnight. he looked at the time on his phone, twenty minutes to the new year. to the new chapter he had desperately been craving.

he took another sip of his drink before he felt a hand on his shoulder, a soft ‘excuse me’ echoing in his ears. he looked up, a smile on your face as you squeezed past the person next to him to stand beside lando. he was quick to wrap his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him in the crowded area.

you smiled, tucking a strand of hair from your face, with your free hand as the other wrapped around his neck, “hey,”

“hey,” he smiled right back at you, “feeling okay?”

you nodded, “i am now, yeah.”

oh if his heart wasn’t already flying out of his chest, it sure was now. your smile alone could send him over the moon. your fingers absentmindedly reaching towards the curls at the nape of his neck, twisting them lightly between your fingers. you loved when he kept his hair a little longer than normal so you could do this.

little did you know, he kept it a little longer just for you to do it.

“want something to drink? i can go grab you something,”

you shook your head, “i’m okay, thank you,”

he nodded back at you, “so, find your new years kiss yet?”

you scrunched your nose, looking around the house, “have you seen the people here? i don’t think i’ll have much luck. you?”

he shrugged, “haven’t had much luck either, but i also haven’t even really been looking.”

you laughed softly, “you haven’t?”

he shook his head, looking past you to look at the clock. ten minutes.

“i mean,” he started, “there’s one girl but i don’t know if she’s into me.”

you raised an eyebrow, trying not to let your face fall as your heart went to your feet, “well, what’s she look like?”

he swallowed a sip from his drink, “she’s gorgeous, even when she thinks she isn’t, she is. she’s really smart, possibly the smartest in the room right now. and she likes to go out, but she’d much rather curl up on the couch and put a movie on or read a book or something. and she keeps me in line, knows when to bring my ego back to earth.”

you smiled softly, “she sounds great.”

“she is,” he scanned your facial features, “she’s the best thing to ever happen to me.”

you sucked in a breath, “is she here?”

“yeah,” he smiled softly, “she’s right in front of me.”

suddenly the world stopped. it felt like time stood still as you stood in front of him. it was like you two were the only ones in the room.

“lando,” you breathed out, unsure of what to say. every birthday wish, every shooting star, you had used for this very moment. and now it was unfolding in front of you, and nothing has made you feel so many things at once quite like this has.

five minutes to the new year.

he smiled back at you, the toothy grin you had learned to fall in love with no matter how much he picked it apart whenever he would take pictures. you loved the little gap between his teeth, the way the moles and freckles charted his skin like constellations. constellations just for you. it was right here in this moment that everything everyone has ever said started to make you realize it has been him all along.

“i know it’s scary and new and every thing we always thought was something that was going to ruin our friendship,” he said, “but i can’t help it. i’m falling in love with you.”

the people around you started counting down, “59, 58, 57…”

“i’m falling in love with you, too,” you said, eyes scanning over his, green with specks of blue and oh so pretty, “i’ve been in love with you since the moment we met.”

he stood now, pulling you closer to him. 30, 29, 28…

“i want this,” he said, “i want you. i always have, and im sorry it took me this long to finally admit it.”

you wrapped your arms around his neck as his snaked around your middle. he was holding you as close as possible, and although it wasn’t a new experience to be this close, to take in the smell of his cologne, the smell of his shampoo and the cream he used to style his stupidly perfect curls. it wasn’t new to experience everything that made him ten times more irresistible, but right now, your heart was about to fly out of your chest at the feeling of him being this close before. a step into uncharted territory and you were growing impatient by the second. wanting nothing more than to just call him yours already. to let the world know that he was yours and yours only. to let your friends know that they were right all along, ready to hear the ‘i told you so’s as long as it kept him right here.

“i’m sorry, too.” you said. and you meant it. you had wished this had happened sooner, you couldn’t help but wonder that if it had, where you two would be now. what your little life would’ve looked like right about now.

with ten seconds left on the clock, he smiled and mumbled to you softly, “be my new years kiss,”

you smiled back at the curly haired boy you’ve loved your whole life, “i wouldn’t want you to kiss anyone else.”

five, four, three, two, one…

there were yells of celebration in the air, the echo of the fireworks on the tv. everyone either toasting to the new years or ringing in a new year with their loved by celebrating with a kiss. but you paid no mind to any of it, to any of the noise circling around you as you took in the way his lips slotted against yours. how his lips tasted like the cherry lip balm you had lent him earlier on in the night with a hint of the whiskey he had been nursing. his hands holding you in place in front of him, yours wrapping around his neck as he took it a step further and licked against your bottom lip.

everything about it sent butterflies straight to your stomach because after all this time, all the dreaming about this moment, it finally happened. you two had managed to crack, let down the facade. and truthfully, it felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders and it made you question why neither of you came clean sooner.

his nose pressed against yours and you laughed softly, meeting his eyes. he was smiling back at you, wrapping a strand of your hair around his finger before slotting it back behind your ear.

he licked his lips, the both of you basking in each other after years and years of pining, “wanna get out of here?”

“please,” you sighed, and with that he led you through the crowd around you. led you to the door of the house party, nodding and bidding his few goodbyes before heading out. you held onto his arm the whole way, until he was unlocking the doors to the mclaren parked down the street. he opened the door for you, just like he always had, and you slid in. this time as he closed the door, you couldn’t help but notice the shift of energy. the way everything was unfolding was nothing less than exciting.

he climbed in on the drivers side, starting the car before slotting his hand with yours.

“mine or yours?”

you shrugged, looking over at him with a smile, “doesn’t matter,”

he nodded, pressing your hand to his lips as he pulled away from the curb. and really, it didn’t matter to you. because you would follow him anywhere. even to the ends of the earth and back.

which, of course he knew that. because he’d do the same for you.

[writingbuckets]

Broken Plays: Chapter 2

paige bueckers x reader

wc: 2.4k

a/n: thank you so much for all the love on part 1. i'm already editing part 3, so stay tuned <3

**********

The library was quiet, the muffled sounds of pages turning and keyboards clicking creating a steady background hum. You sat at a large wooden table, your laptop open in front of you and a half-empty iced coffee to your right. It was mid-afternoon, the time when most students were either in class or still recovering from the night before. You’d managed to carve out a peaceful corner for yourself, though that tranquility was soon interrupted when two familiar figures plopped down across from you.

“Yo, hope you don’t mind us crashing your study sesh,” a voice said, drawing your attention away from the screen.

It was Jana and Azzi, two of Paige’s teammates and your classmates in one of the upper-level business courses. The three of you had been grouped together for a project, which was how you’d come to know them better outside of the occasional party or casual interaction.

“Not at all,” youreplied with a faint smile. Jana and Azzi were easygoing, funny, and completely unaware of the complicated mess that was your history with Paige. You liked them for that—they didn’t pry or push, and for the most part, they were blissfully unaware of the tension lurking beneath the surface.

Jana grinned, dropping her backpack onto the table. “Good, because we brought snacks.” She pulled out a bag of chips and offered some to Azzi, who immediately grabbed a handful.

You chuckled, relaxing slightly. “I see you’re taking this study session very seriously.”

“Hey, brain food is important,” Jana said with a mock-serious tone, popping a chip into her mouth. “Plus, we’ve got like an hour before we have to actually be productive, right?”

“Sure,” you said, taking a sip of your coffee. “We’ll go with that.”

For the next few minutes, the three of you fell into easy conversation, mostly about your project and a few upcoming assignments. You found yourself enjoying the banter, grateful for the distraction. But as much as you tried to focus on the conversation, there was an undercurrent of anxiety you couldn’t quite shake.

You hadn’t seen Paige since the party a few weeks ago, but that didn’t mean you hadn’t been thinking about her. It was impossible not to. After your last encounter—the cold, awkward tension, the almost-conversation in the kitchen—you had been left feeling raw, like an open wound that wouldn’t heal. No matter how much distance you tried to put between you two, Paige always seemed to find a way to slip back into you life, even if it was just through mutual friends like Jana and Azzi.

The worst part was, you knew you weren’t over her. Not really. As much as you tried to act like you didn’t care anymore, that Paige’s rejection hadn’t cut you deep, there was a part of you that still held on to the memory of what you’d had. Or what you’d thought you had.

Your relationship—or whatever it had been—had started off light, fun, and uncomplicated. You’d met through mutual friends, and it hadn’t taken long for the chemistry between you to spark. It was supposed to be casual, just a few late-night hookups, no expectations, no strings attached. At first, it was exactly that. Paige was charming, confident, and frustratingly attractive, and you had been content to keep things simple. You weren’t looking for anything serious either, and Paige made it clear from the beginning that she wasn’t the type to settle down.

But somewhere along the way, you had broken your own rules. You’d started to fall. Hard. It wasn’t just the sex—though that had been great—it was everything else. The stolen moments in between, the late-night texts, the way Paige had looked at you like you were the only person in the room. It had felt real, even if neither of you had said the words.

Then, just when you had been on the verge of confessing how you felt, Paige had pulled away. Suddenly, the texts were fewer and farther between. The casual meetups became rare, then nonexistent. Paige had distanced herself without explanation, leaving you feeling like you’d been tossed aside the moment things started to get serious.

You’d tried to play it cool, act like it didn’t bother you, but inside, it hurt more than you wanted to admit. Eventually, you’d made the decision to walk away, cutting things off before Paige could hurt you even more. You’d told yourself it was for the best, that you deserved better than someone who couldn’t commit. But knowing that hadn’t made it any easier.

And now, here you were, sitting with Paige’s teammates, trying to pretend like the past wasn’t constantly nipping at your heels.

“So, what’s the plan for this project?” Jana asked, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“Right,” you said, refocusing. “I was thinking we could split up the research into sections. I’ll take the first part, and you two can divide the second and third.”

“Works for me,” Azzi said, typing something into her laptop.

As you settled into a rhythm, you let yourself relax a bit, pushing thoughts of Paige to the back of your mind. But that peace didn’t last long. Just as you were getting into a groove, you heard a voice behind you, one that made your heart sink into your stomach.

“Hey, what’s up?”

Paige.

Your spine stiffened, but you didn’t turn around. You didn’t need to. You could feel Paige’s presence, could sense her standing just a few feet away. Your throat tightened, and you forced yourself to keep your eyes on your laptop, pretending to be engrossed in whatever was on the screen.

Jana and Azzi didn’t seem to notice the shift in your demeanor. They both smiled at Paige as she approached the table, casually pulling out a chair.

“Bueckers, what are you doing here?” Jana asked, raising an eyebrow. “I thought you had a meeting with coach.”

Paige shrugged, her voice light. “He let me out early. Figured I’d come see what you guys were up to.”

You could hear the smile in her voice, that easy charm you knew all too well. It made your chest tighten with a mix of frustration and something you didn’t want to name.

“Studying for our project,” Azzi said, gesturing to the mess of papers and laptops in front of you all. “Or trying to, anyway.”

Paige’s gaze flicked briefly to you, and for a moment, the air between you crackled with tension. You could feel Paige’s eyes on you, but you refused to look up. You weren’t going to give her the satisfaction.

“Cool, cool,” Paige said casually, though there was an edge to her tone that hadn’t been there before. “Mind if I hang out for a bit?”

Your fingers tightened around the edge of your laptop. Great. Just what you needed.

“Yeah, sure, grab a seat,” Jana said, oblivious to the silent war raging across the table.

Paige pulled out a chair and sat down, her presence an unwelcome weight in your periphery. You could feel Paige’s gaze lingering on you, but you didn’t dare meet it. You wouldn’t give her the power. Not this time.

For the next few minutes, the conversation flowed easily between Paige, Jana, and Azzi, with you contributing only when absolutely necessary. You could tell Paige was trying to act normal, but there was a subtle tension in her voice, like she was holding back. It was as if Paige was testing the waters, gauging how much you were willing to engage. But you weren’t going to give her anything. Not after everything.

Eventually, the conversation shifted back to the project, and Paige leaned back in her chair, watching you all work. You kept your head down, focused on your laptop, but every so often, you could feel Paige’s gaze flit in your direction.

It was maddening, how just being near Paige could stir up so many conflicting emotions. Frustration, anger, longing—everything you’d been trying to bury for months came bubbling back to the surface. But you couldn’t let it show. Not here, not in front of Jana and Azzi.

The longer Paige sat at the table, the more the tension thickened. You could feel it pressing down on you, coiling around your chest. Every time Paige shifted in her chair or made a casual remark, it was like a reminder of the mess you’d left unresolved. You didn’t want to think about it—about the way things had ended, or how Paige had brushed you off like you were nothing. But sitting here, in such close proximity to her, made it impossible to avoid the memories that came flooding back.

You hated how easy it was for Paige to act normal, like nothing had ever happened between you two. Paige was good at that—at pretending, at pushing things aside and focusing on the present. It was part of what had drawn you to her in the first place. You admired Paige’s ability to compartmentalize, to separate her feelings from her actions. But now, that same trait was infuriating. Paige could sit here, joking around with her teammates, while you were left to choke down the bitterness of unresolved emotions.

“Alright, I think we’ve got enough to get started on the research,” Jana announced, breaking the silence. “We’ll meet up again on Wednesday to go over what we’ve found?”

“Sounds good,” Azzi agreed, already packing up her things.

You nodded absently, your mind still swirling. You didn’t want to linger here any longer than necessary, especially with Paige hanging around. You could feel the edge of a headache forming, a dull throb at the base of your skull. You needed space—away from the lingering memories, away from the unresolved tension that seemed to cling to you like a second skin.

As everyone began to gather their belongings, Paige stretched her arms over her head, letting out a low sigh. “I’m heading to the gym later if anyone wants to come,” she said casually, though the offer wasn’t directed at anyone in particular.

You tensed but kept your eyes glued to your laptop screen, pretending not to hear.

Jana grinned. “I might take you up on that. Gotta work off all the junk food I’ve been eating.”

Azzi laughed. “Same. I’ll catch you later, though. I’ve got class in like fifteen.”

You made a quick decision to leave before you could be drawn into any more awkward small talk. You packed up your laptop, grabbing your bag, and pushed your chair back.

“I’ve got to run too,” you muttered, standing abruptly. “See you guys later.”

Before anyone could respond, you turned on your heel and made your way toward the exit, your pulse hammering in your ears. You didn’t look back to see Paige’s reaction—you didn’t need to. The suffocating weight on your chest told you everything you needed to know.

**********

After spending most of the afternoon buried in work at a local café on campus, you finally decided to take a break. You weren’t one to spend your weekends cooped up inside, and besides, you’d agreed to meet someone for a casual dinner. It wasn’t anything serious—just a low-key date with a girl you’d been chatting with online for a few weeks. Her name was Emily, and while you hadn’t met in person before, she seemed cool—funny, smart, and down-to-earth.

You figured it was time to get back out there, to try and move on from the lingering feelings you had for Paige. You deserved to be with someone who didn’t leave you hanging, who didn’t pull away the moment things started to get real.

Emily was waiting at a small, trendy café downtown, dressed in a casual denim jacket and black jeans. She had short, tousled brown hair and a warm smile that immediately put you at ease.

“Hey!” Emily greeted you with a grin as you walked up. “You made it!”

“Yeah, sorry if I’m a little late,” you replied with a smile, feeling a sense of relief at how easy it was to slip into casual conversation. “Lost track of time at the library.”

“No worries. I just got here too,” Emily said, leading the way toward a table outside. The evening was cool, the sky fading into hues of purple and orange as the sun began to set. It was the perfect setting for a laid-back, no-pressure date.

You settled into your seats, ordering drinks and appetizers. The conversation flowed easily, with Emily talking about her recent travels and her love for indie music. You found yourself laughing at Emily’s stories, feeling more relaxed than you had in weeks. Maybe this was exactly what you needed—a fresh start with someone new.

As you waited for your food, you glanced around, taking in the bustling energy of the café. But your light mood quickly soured when you spotted a familiar figure across the street.

Paige. Again.

She was walking with her roommate, Lily, a protein shake in hand, looking as casual and effortlessly cool as ever. Your stomach dropped, your heart racing in your chest as Paige’s eyes landed on you. For a split second, you locked eyes, and the tension between you flared to life once again.

Paige’s expression shifted—her casual smile fading into something darker, something that looked an awful lot like jealousy. She hesitated for a moment, her gaze flicking between you and Emily, before turning back to her roommate, muttering something under her breath.

Your pulse quickened, your throat tightening. You hadn’t expected to see Paige tonight, much less in the middle of what was supposed to be a relaxing date. And from the way Paige was looking at you, it was clear that she wasn’t thrilled about it either.

“Everything okay?” Emily asked, her voice pulling you back to the present.

You forced a smile, shaking off the unsettling feeling creeping up your spine. “Yeah, sorry. Just… thought I saw someone I knew.”

“Oh?” Emily raised an eyebrow, clearly curious, but didn’t press the issue. “No biggie. So, what about you? Been anywhere cool recently?”

You tried to refocus, but your mind kept drifting back to Paige, to the look on her face when she’d seen you with Emily. It was ridiculous—Paige had no right to be jealous, not after everything that had happened. But the memory of that fleeting expression stuck with you, gnawing at the back of your mind.

By the time you’d finished dinner, you felt drained, the weight of your unresolved feelings for Paige dragging you down. Emily was nice—sweet, funny, and kind. But even as you said your goodbyes, you couldn’t help but feel like something was missing.

As Emily leaned in to give you a quick hug, you offered a polite smile, but your mind was already elsewhere. Paige had been an uninvited guest in your thoughts all night, and as much as you hated it, you knew it wasn’t going to stop anytime soon.

[steddieas-shegoes]

falling is easy, catching is hard

rated m | also on ao3 cw: recreational drug use, implied sexual content tags: friends with benefits, secret relationship, shotgunning, mutual pining, getting together, love confessions

HAPPY BIRTHDAY @sidekick-hero!!! Sandy, you deserve the world, but this 3000 word thing will have to do for now 💖

💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

December 19, 1985

Steve Harrington needed sleep.

Eddie Munson had the only thing that would put him to sleep.

But Eddie Munson also held a grudge, a reasonable one, but an annoying one.

“You want me to sell you the last of my good shit? For half price?” Eddie snorted. “You’re out of your damn mind, Harrington.”

“Munson, please. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important,” Steve begged.

“Why would I do you any favors? You never did me any.”

Eddie crossed his arms over his chest, waiting somewhat impatiently for a response from Steve.

Steve didn’t have one.

Eddie was right; He didn’t really deserve a favor from someone who had let his friends make his first senior year absolutely miserable.

But Robin’s voice looped in his head: “Be vulnerable sometimes, Steve. People may surprise you.”

“Listen man, I just really need to sleep, alright? I’ve tried everything else.” Steve sighed. “This is pretty much my last hope.”

Which was a truth and a lie. He’d already tried smoking some weed, knew that it worked.

Eddie’s forehead creased in the middle.

That’s kinda cute, Steve thought to himself before shaking his head. Now wasn’t the time to get distracted by big, brown eyes and shiny lips.

“You been to a doctor?” Eddie asked.

“The sleeping pills make them worse.”

“Make what worse?” Eddie pushed.

“The nightmares.”

Eddie nodded once, understanding flitting across his face as he relaxed his arms by his sides.

“How long you been havin’ them?” Eddie asked as he walked around to the bench at the picnic table, opening his lunchbox.

“I guess…technically years. They’ve been worse since July though.” Steve knew he had to be careful about what he said, couldn’t give away more than what the public knew about what happened at the mall, but Eddie seemed trustworthy enough to handle this part. “Doctors said it’s normal for trauma or whatever.”

Eddie nodded, whispered something under his breath, and shuffled through his box.

“Forgot you worked at the mall over the summer. Kinda crazy what happened,” he said as he pulled a small discolored plastic bag from the box. “I’ll make you a one-time only deal, Stevie.”

Steve ignored the butterflies in his stomach at the nickname, kicked at the dirt under his feet, and gestured for Eddie to continue.

“I’m not giving my product away for half price. I’m a businessman and that’s not a smart financial decision for my business.” Eddie held up a hand when Steve looked like he was going to argue. “But! I will share a joint with you right here, right now, for free.”

“Um. What?”

“I was gonna smoke this one tonight as a celebration for passing all my first semester finals by the skin of my teeth. I don’t mind sharing if you don’t.” Eddie’s smirk made the butterflies even worse.

Steve was going to regret this.

God, he was so stupid.

“Yeah, okay.”

Smoking with Eddie the first time was nice, but the second, and third, and fourth times were even better.

— — — — — — —

January 16, 1986

“You’re late, Stevie. I was starting to worry you’d gotten frostbite.” Eddie’s smile warmed Steve from the inside out, the shiver wracking his body more to do with the growing fondness he had for the curly-haired man in front of him.

Eddie was bundled up like they were in Antarctica, and to be fair, it was below freezing outside right now.

Steve offered to meet somewhere else, but Eddie insisted they come to his usual spot.

And then Steve saw it: Eddie had built them a fire. It was small, he probably didn’t want to draw any attention from the road, but it was throwing heat that Steve craved.

“Come warm up before we get into it,” Eddie waved him over, his gloved hands looking out of place.

Steve was used to seeing shiny rings on his fingers, blisters on his fingertips from playing too much guitar.

Steve stood next to him in front of the fire, holding his own gloved hands out to try to warm his body as much as possible.

“Any reason I couldn’t just come to your house or something?” Steve asked, not quite getting rid of the attitude in his tone.

“My Uncle has tonight off. He’s a pretty chill guy, but I think actively watching me sell drugs to someone would maybe cause a heart attack.” Eddie sighed. “I told him I had a date tonight so I couldn’t really have you show up after that.”

“A date?” Steve grinned, nudging Eddie’s arm. “I didn’t even bring flowers.”

Eddie rolled his eyes, but looked away to cover a blush. “Yeah, well, don’t expect me to put out until there’s a dozen roses in my hand.”

He meant it as a joke surely, but something in Steve’s chest clenched at the thought of spoiling Eddie like that. Maybe not roses, that didn’t quite seem his style.

“I’ll try to remember them next time,” Steve managed to say, nearly choking on his own words.

What was he even doing? Flirting? Eddie didn’t even consider him a real friend, why would he want him to bring him flowers?

“Got a new strain tonight. It’s supposed to be a little stronger, but fades faster, so you should be good to drive back home in a couple hours.” Eddie pulled the baggie out of his pocket, lunchbox long gone after meeting twice a week for the last month.

Steve wasn’t really a customer anymore, no matter how they tried to keep up appearances that he was.

He still tipped Eddie, or tried to, but usually Eddie ignored it and just said it was a favor to help him sleep.

“How strong?” Steve finally asked as Eddie pulled the lighter from his pocket.

“Might make you a little floatier than usual. Not hallucinogenic, though.” Eddie knew he couldn’t handle that kind of trip. That’s why he stayed away from his other offerings. “I tested it out myself earlier this week.”

Steve wasn’t reading into that.

“Okay.” He fought off a shiver, this time from actually being cold. “Guess it’s worth a try.”

“I’ll drive you home if it’s too much.” Eddie’s offer was kind, going above and beyond what a dealer would do for a customer, but Steve wasn’t reading into it. “Or you can nap it off in the van for an hour or so before heading home. Whatever.”

Eddie lit the joint, breathing in long and slow, holding the smoke until Steve was sure he would pass out before slowly letting it out.

He handed the roll to Steve, who didn’t think about what Eddie meant by stronger, and took his normal pull, choking halfway through.

Eddie’s eyes widened as he took the joint from him, his hand grabbing onto Steve’s arm as he coughed.

“Jesus Christ, man, you good?” Eddie asked him.

“Yeah,” he coughed. “Sorry. It is a lot stronger.”

Eddie searched his face, relaxing as Steve’s breathing went back to normal. “Good?”

“Yeah.”

“Maybe take it slower?” Eddie teased. “Or- no never mind.”

“Or what?” Steve asked, already feeling the heaviness that came with smoking.

“Ever shotgunned before?”

Steve’s heart stopped. He’d venture to say he was even stone cold sober again after that question.

“Um. No.” He hadn’t. He’d wanted to with Nancy, figured it would be the only way she would be interested in trying weed, but it never worked out. “Would it be easier?”

“Yeah,” Eddie nodded. “Usually. We can give it a try if you want.”

Steve nodded before he really processed what he was being offered.

Eddie’s mouth would be very, very close to his. Possibly even on his.

And he’d be sharing breath with him, probably more than one if it worked.

Eddie pulled the picnic table closer to the fire and sat on the bench. He patted the seat next to him.

“Might as well get comfy, then,” Eddie said.

Steve sat next to him, close enough to feel the warmth coming from his side, close enough to hear Eddie’s hitched breath when they made contact.

Close enough to want to be closer.

“Alright, so I’ll start with a small one, and you just have to breathe in when I breathe out.”

“Is it-” Steve played with a loose thread on his gloves. “Your lips are gonna touch mine?”

Eddie suddenly looked nervous, like he regretted offering this at all, and Steve couldn’t allow that.

“I don’t mind! I mean, I want you to!” Steve panicked. “Like, it’s fine! I know we have to for the whole thing to work.”

“Yeah. Um, it’s not like, weird or anything. It’s just me helping you get high.”

It wasn’t weird, but it definitely was hot.

Eddie took a drag, leaned into Steve’s space, and cupped his jaw, tilting his head back for easier access.

Steve couldn’t breathe.

But he had to, that was the whole fucking point of doing this.

His lips parted and Eddie’s warmth coated him, covered him better than the fire.

He breathed in as Eddie breathed out, his hand seeking contact with anything solid to keep him on this earth.

He found it in Eddie’s hip, his fingers gripping tight as Eddie lingered beyond the point of the smoke clearing from his mouth to Steve’s.

Their lips brushed lightly, an agonizingly soft touch that Steve tried his best not to chase as it drifted away.

He bit back a whine at the loss, opening his eyes to see Eddie still surprisingly close, pupils huge.

It’s just the weed, Steve thought to himself.

It definitely wasn’t their almost-kiss.

Steve breathed out, swallowing once the smoke was gone from his mouth.

“Good?” Eddie asked.

Steve should answer him, should nod and thank him for doing this, maybe ask him for another hit so he could try to blame his fidgeting on being high.

But Steve wanted to kiss him.

Not shotgun, not barely brush lips, not act like this wasn’t something more than what it started as.

Robin told him he deserved nice things, and he deserved to be happy, and he did.

So Steve let himself try to have a nice thing.

“Again?” Steve asked, leaning in before Eddie had a chance to take a drag.

“Woah, big boy.” Eddie’s hands grabbed his shoulders, not pushing him away, but holding him back from making contact that he so desperately wanted. “Think that first hit might have gotten to you already. Let’s take a minute.”

“No, I-”

“Steve. You’re high.”

His tone was final, and something about the way his eyes darted away made Steve think that maybe this wasn’t the first time someone tried to make a move on him because he was giving them something.

He didn’t know Steve was into men, either.

Steve could just tell him, though. Let him know it’s not just the drugs, that he’d already had feelings for him before.

But the high was kicking in and Steve’s tongue felt like an iron weight.

“How about I get you some water?” Eddie asked, pulling away and walking swiftly to his van.

Steve didn’t protest. He did need some water.

Eddie sat on the other side of the table when he came back, handed over a bottle of water with a small smile, and watched as Steve gulped most of it down.

“This is good shit,” Steve admitted, slurring his words a little from the effort of moving his mouth. “Better than usual.”

“Yeah, it’s a nice treat once in a while.”

They sat in silence for another 30 minutes or so, though the time didn’t even feel like it was passing to Steve until Eddie stood up and guided him to the passenger seat of his van.

“Wha-?”

“I’m gonna drop you off at home. You got someone who can help you get your car tomorrow?” Eddie buckled his seatbelt, Steve tried not to be too endeared. “Maybe Buckley? Or Wheeler?”

Steve’s brows furrowed.

Nancy had barely talked to him in months, not since she gave him one awkward hug after Starcourt. Robin couldn’t drive, or at least said she couldn’t. That’s why he drove her to school and all of her work shifts.

“Maybe you could?” Steve suggested.

Eddie sighed. “I’ll see what I can do.”

— — — — — — —

February 14, 1986

Steve got him flowers.

He hadn’t seen him since the night he drove Steve home.

By the time Steve woke up the next morning, his car was parked in the driveway with a note on his keys that said ‘Promise there’s not a dent on her.’

And then Eddie had ignored his calls. He’d conveniently never been at his spot anytime Steve had ever met up with him before.

He couldn’t even pass a message through Dustin because Dustin was too curious for his own good and would probably figure out that Steve wanted to kiss him.

Which is all Steve thought about for the last month while he figured out what to do next.

Robin was no help at all, said he should just corner him after Hellfire one night and make a move if he wanted him so bad.

As if that could ever be an option.

This was his last chance, though.

He’d confirmed with one of his bandmates – Garrett, maybe? – that he didn’t have plans tonight and refused to sell on Valentine’s Day.

Steve stood in front of Eddie’s trailer, a bouquet of white and pink daisies in his hand, feeling particularly stupid.

The van was here, so Eddie was here, but Steve couldn’t bring himself to walk up the steps and knock on the door. This was maybe the most idiotic thing he’d ever done and he probably should leave before he was seen by someone.

“Steve?” Eddie opened the front door, confusion clear even from a distance. “The hell are you doing here?”

“I said I’d bring you flowers.”

He felt so dumb, standing here holding a bouquet of flowers for a guy who didn’t even want to sell drugs to him anymore. He considered dropping the flowers and making a run for it, but Eddie leaned against the door frame and scrunched his nose up.

Like he was trying not to smile.

Like maybe Steve did something right.

“Better bring them in so they can get water, then,” Eddie said with a hesitant smile.

Steve would take any type of smile, as long as it meant he wasn’t being sent away with his tail between his legs.

He rushed inside, didn’t think about the smell of Irish Spring coming off of Eddie, or the way his arm brushed against his side as he passed him.

Steve stood in Eddie’s trailer, taking in what Eddie called home, holding the flowers in front of him with hope.

Eddie closed the front door and walked over to him, holding his hand out.

“You didn’t have to get me flowers just for me to sell you drugs again, ya know.” Eddie smiled sadly. “I would have let you buy if you really needed it.”

“You won’t return my calls so how would you know if I needed it?” Steve countered.

“Ouch.” Eddie sucked a breath in through his teeth. “You’re right. I, uh, was giving you some space.”

“What made you think I wanted any?” Steve took the flowers back from Eddie’s hand, setting them on the coffee table behind him. “If I wanted space, I wouldn’t have bothered calling at all.”

“That’s what Wayne said, but-”

“Well, maybe you should’ve listened to Wayne.” Steve sighed. “I’m sorry I fucked things up by wanting to kiss you. I’m sorry if the flowers are too much. I’m sorry if I’m too much.”

Steve couldn’t look at Eddie after his confession, or his attempt at one. It may have been more of an apology, but he figured his intentions were clear enough.

“Steve. Stevie. Look at me.” Eddie cupped his cheeks, that familiar warmth covering Steve in safety. “You’re not too much. Don’t ever, ever let anyone tell you that you’re too much. You were so high, I didn’t wanna take advantage. I thought if I just left you to think about it long enough, you’d realize what happened was just from the weed.”

Steve shook his head, reaching his hands up to circle Eddie’s wrists. “It wasn’t just the weed. You’d know that if you let me talk to you before now.”

Eddie rubbed his thumb along his cheekbone, eyes dancing across the freckles that covered Steve’s surprisingly sun-kissed skin. “I’m sorry I didn’t let you explain.”

“You’re forgiven if you listen now,” Steve took a breath, letting his hands run down Eddie’s arms and settle on his hips. “I like you. A lot. Definitely more than a customer should, more than a friend should, maybe more than a regular boyfriend should. It’s okay if that’s too much, but it’s what I have to give.”

“You’re really something, Stevie.” Eddie leaned in, pressing his lips to the corner of Steve’s mouth. “I think I’ll take what you’re giving if that’s alright with you.”

“Please,” Steve breathed out as Eddie’s lips crushed against his fully.

Steve always felt so much, always gave so much, hardly ever had anyone who would take what he had to give.

But Eddie was taking it, forcing it from Steve to his own body, his own heart, like it was the only thing he wanted or needed.

“If you wanna buy tonight, you’re gonna be real disappointed,” Eddie gasped out against his lips when they came up for air minutes, maybe hours, later. “I don’t sell on major holidays.”

“Is Valentine’s Day a major holiday?” Steve asked, brows furrowing.

“It is when I get to have you in my bed.”

Steve’s eyes widened. “Oh.”

“That sound okay to you, big boy?” Eddie was smooth. Who could have possibly guessed?

Steve barely got out a ‘yes’ before Eddie was pulling him down the short hallway to his bedroom and rattling off things he wanted to do to him.

Steve Harrington probably wasn’t getting any sleep tonight.

But Eddie Munson would make it worth his while.

[spellboundstarlet]

kate martin x barista reader ˗ˏˋ☕ˎˊ˗

coffee kisses.

— kate started coming into the cafe you work at because her usual was closed for renovations. she wasn’t one to love change, but she was one to love coffee.

— the shop was small, and local. not many people came to this one as it was in a pretty secluded part of town, and most didn’t even know it had been built a few years back. the only customers you had were men who came in everyday hoping today would be the day you’d say yes to going out on a date with them, or people like kate who’d just put “coffee shop near me” into their gps. the coffee was amazing, the pastries were to die for, and you could say that your customer service was great. 

— her order was simple, easy to remember, and she was major sweetheart who always tipped you much more than you thought you deserved. every time you saw her car pull up, her order was made to perfection and some sort of doodle was draw on her cup.

— given she was extremely attractive, and her manners made her so much more enchanting, you were feeling bold. the shop was empty, your coworker was on break, and it was only you and kate. the girl stood looking at her phone, waiting for her order. you called her name, and handed her the cup which you had written “for the pretty blonde”. kate thanked you, not even bothering to look at the cup until she had entered her car. the second she’d read that her mind was all over the place. had this cup been for her? who else would it be for? did you find her pretty?

— the next time she visited the shop, she’d finally worked up the courage to ask for your number. 

“could i have your number. im sorry if that’s weird.. it’s fine if not, i don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” she said, fumbling over her words.

“i’ve been waiting for you to ask,” you giggle. you handed her her cup with your number written on the side.

— the two of you would facetime, and hangout, first as “friends” but you both knew you’d never be “friends”. the mutual attraction that neither of you would admit was the elephant in the room, both of you too afraid it would scare the other off. 

— the second you got together, dating rumors were all over. not that you minded. you adored being able to call the blonde yours. your dumb videos posted about being a barista were suddenly viral and business at the shop was doing so well that you’d been given a raise. 

her posting pictures of you in you’re uniform with the caption “barista of the year!!” 

— the kisses shared between you two tasted coffee-like and maybe that’s why she was so addicting. you were hooked on her touch, you craved the feeling of her lips on yours. you both loved your “coffee kisses”.

divs are by @/anitalenia , feedback encouraged , first wnba work.

[axelsagewrites]

Where Am I?*Part Seven

Pairing: modern!f!reader x (to be determined...soon...) Ubbe, Ivar, Sigurd, Hviserks, Bjorn

Series Summary: After falling head first the reader wakes up face to face with a group of strangely dressed men who look eerily like the vikings she studies

Word count: 1511

Part one Part two Part three Part four Part five Part six

Masterlist Here

Slowly but surely, you were settling into this new Viking lifestyle. That doesn’t mean it didn’t have its draw backs.

“There just innards!” Sigurd half yelled as you tried not to puke.

“I don’t care its gross!”

“Its food!”

“Not yet it ain’t!” you gagged, remembering how he tried to make you disassemble the deer. You’d went back home a shuddering mess and luckily Bjorn said he’d do it for you. But Sigurd wasn’t letting it go, “What’s the big deal anyway? it’s done now,”

“Because you get the princess treatment,” he rolled his eyes as he continued to cut up his onions.

You rolled your eyes and tried your best to focus on the carrots. Then you heard a sniffle, “Dude, are you crying?”

“No!” he spat, “It’s the onions,”

“It’s only because you’re crushing them, here- “you tried to help him, but he snatched the knife back, “I’m just trying to help,”

Sigurd rolled his eyes, continuing to cut the onions through his tears, “Well you’re helping wrong,”

That’s it. you gave it. you dumped the carrots you’d just cut into the stew and stormed away, ignoring his protests.

As you made your way to the market you breathed a sigh of relief when you spotted Ivar and Hvitserk at a stall. They smiled as you approached but you just groaned, “Is he always such a control freak?” They glanced at each other before nodding in unison, “Next time give me a heads up,”

“You never listen when we do,” Hvitserk teased.

“That’s cause you give terrible advice,” you hummed sweetly, “You boys having a shopping spree?”

You had all came to a mutual understanding that you would no longer be explaining every little modern phrase or idiom since you wanted to keep your sanity intact. Now they just guessed and hoped for the best.

“I think?” Hvitserk said, “I need leather to make a new bag and Ivar just likes looking at shiny things,” he said as he nudged his younger brother.

You just smiled, confused by the slight blush on his cheeks and Hvitserk’s sniggers. Clearly you hadn’t noticed Ivar checking you out. “Mind if I tag along?”

Walking around the markets of Kattegat was both chaotic and oddly relaxing. You probably would be nervous if you weren’t flanked by at least two sons of Ragnar at all times. You were stood admiring a jewellery stall while Ivar argued with the stall owner over a price of a carved dagger head. Hvitserk in his true fashion was chatting up the stall owner’s daughter.

“Which one do you like?”

“Jesus!” you span around, pushing Ubbe back, “don’t sneak up on me,”

The older brother laughed as you let out a sigh and turned back to the stall, “Sorry, sorry. You make it too easy though,” he held his hands up in mock defence as he peered over your shoulder.

You rolled your eyes before picking up one of the bracelets. It looked like silver, iron maybe, you weren’t a hundred percent sure on what was used these days, but it was beautiful. An open bangle with a Viking cross on its face, Celtic banding going along the sides. “This is cute though,”

As you looked up you saw Ubbe nodding to the guy before they began to barter, “You really don’t have to- “Ubbe didn’t even respond as the men continued to haggle. You stood, unable to intersect, until eventually Ubbe handed the man some coins, “You didn’t need to buy it- “

“I wanted to,” he said, taking it gently from your hands and placing it on your wrist. You coughed a little, trying to force the butterflies out your stomach but when Ubbe looked up at you with a little smile you had to look away.

“Thank you,” you muttered.

-

Later that evening you were all sat around the fire after polishing off the stew Sigurd had made. “That was one good deer,” Hvitserk said as he laid back, resting his head in his hands as he faced the sky.

“Would’ve been nicer if I had some help to cook,” Sigurd grumbled.

Eyebrows raised at his comment but despite how petty you wanted to be you decided to ignore him. When Bjorn looked at you, eyebrow raised, you mouthed ‘tell you later’ and stood up. “Anyone else want more wine?”

All cups went into the air. You laughed as you grabbed the jug, topping off all the cups. Of course you started with Sigurd, not before asking, “More wine?” with a sweet smile. To which he grumbled a quiet yes. You rolled your eyes before turning to the rest of the boys.

You were honestly surprised Bjorn actually joined you all for stew. Ragnar had joined you all but skipped out on the post dinner drinks to go annoy Floki about some boat while Aslaug disappeared into her own world.

Not wanting to disturb her you all decided to start a bonfire a short walk away while you all relaxed. “Thanks,” Bjorn muttered as you finished filling his cup. He raised an eyebrow when you sat down between him and Hvitserk’s star gazing but didn’t protest. “New bracelet?”

Instinctively your hand went to your wrist, holding the bracelet lightly, “Ubbe got me it,”

Ubbe nodded silently while Ivar’s eyes went wide before trying to appear calm, “When?” he asked.

“When you were threatening to demonstrate all the things you could do with a dagger to the owner of the stall,” you smirked. Ivar rolled his eyes, but it was Hvitserk laugh that caught your attention. “What?”

“Oh, nothing you sweet summer child,” he teased. As Sigurd snorted at his joke you decided to be mature. So naturally you hit Hvitserk. “Hey!” he whined, rubbing where you smacked his shoulder.

“Are all Vikings horn dogs or is it just him?”

“I’d ask what that means,” Ubbe laughed, “but I can take a guess,”

“Hey, I just like a little fun,” Hvitserk protested with a laugh, but you just rolled your eyes.

Before this conversation could get any worse for you, you decided to change it, “So what Viking training do I get tomorrow?”

“We have to do training tomorrow,” Ubbe said, before giving his brothers a pointed look, “and no getting out of it this time,” he said only to get waved off. You saw a slight smirk on Bjorn’s face as he watched how his younger brothers interacted. It must be quite odd for him, you thought, being so much older yet still only being a brother.

“I guess I have been a bit of a distraction,” you laughed before laying down next to Hvitserk to look at the stars.

You didn’t need to look up to know Sigurd was nodding his head. “A welcome one though,” Hvitserk teased, his head rolling over to smirk at you. You just hummed at him, before turning your attention back to the stars.

“I suppose I shall entertain myself,” you sighed and before anyone could protest you decided to add, “and if anyone ruins my long lay in, I shall use the skills you all taught me to stab you,”

“You become more like us every day,” Ubbe laughed. The chatter continued but you found your attention being lost more and more as you gazed into the sky.

You couldn’t help but let your mind wander. Did your family miss you? Were they looking for you right now? How much time had even past back home? It’s only been a week here, yet it felt like a lifetime. Did they even know you were gone?

“You, okay?” Hvitserk’s hushed voice snapped you out of it though not loud enough to distract the others from their conversations.

You turned your head to him and that’s when you felt the wetness on the side of your face. Quickly you whipped the tears away, “Yeah sorry. Was just thinking,”

“It’s alright,” he said, a soft smile on his face, “What about?”

You debated saying nothing, but his sweet smile made you, “Home,”

“I’m sorry,”

“It’s not your fault,” you said, turning your head back to the sky.

“Can I admit something rather selfish?” he asked and when you glance over you also noticed his eyes were back on the stars.

“Always,”

Finally, he met your eyes again, “I’m glad you’re here. Even if it means…you know,”

You smiled lightly, “I’m glad to be here, in a weird, twisted way. I just hope someday I get to go back. I miss it,”

“What was it like?” he asked.

Your eyes went back to the stars as you began to retell your tales. Stories you once thought were insignificant meant so much. Hvitserk listened to it all. After what felt like an hour of talking you finally let him get a word in edge wise, not that he was complaining, “I hope I get to come with you, even for a little while. You can show me your world,”

“Id like that,” you smiled before you both just lingered in the comfortable silence.

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[froggibus]

I Love You, I Love You. It’s Disgusting. - Leon S Kennedy

Pairing: Leon S Kennedy x reader

Genre: angst, hurt/comfort

Word Count: 1.5k

Summary: the deal has always been no serious commitment, but that all changes when you accidentally confess your love for him

CW: FWB, angst -> fluff, hurt/comfort, commitment issues, unrequited love, mutual pining, love confessions

syd? making fun of Leon’s commitment issues? call that projecting B)

————

“Do you really have to go?” You look up at Leon with sad eyes. 

He tugs his jeans over his hips and starts to lace his belt through the loops. He sighs. It was barely five in the morning, you should’ve been dead asleep. You usually were.

Through the countless times Leon had ran out on you during the night, you had been out cold. It made it easier for him—not having to see the disappointed look on your face, not having to confront your feelings. 

All it took was one fumble of his hands for his phone to clatter on your floor, snapping you out of your sleep. He knew he was fucked as soon as your eyes flickered open. 

“You know I do,” he says. “It’s work and—”

“It’s always work,” you mumble bitterly, drawing your knees into your chest. 

“My work is important.”

“And I’m not?”

It was a low blow. You knew the nature of your relationship just as much as Leon—nothing serious, no commitments, just him reaching out to you in the dead of night for a shred of comfort. Your arms were wide open for him, but he always kept you at arm’s length. 

You’ve tried so fucking hard to not catch feelings for the man, knowing how he is and his inability to ever commit. Still, when he had walked into your door a week ago and wrapped his arms around you, your feelings bubbled to the surface. 

All week, it had been on your mind, on the tip of your tongue. Not that you would ever say it—those weren’t words you could say to him, not unless you want to be hurt. 

“You know what this is,” he sighs, “so I don’t know what your problem is.”

Leon’s words make you cringe, but you know he’s right. If you were less stubborn, you would just move on. Find someone who actually wants to move forward with you. But that would mean moving on from Leon, and a part of you knows that you never truly could. 

I love you. The words float around in your mind, trying to force their way out of you. You bite them back, swallowing hard. 

“The problem is that I don’t want this, Leon! We’re not kids anymore, I want to move forward with my life!”

“And why does that have to be with me?”

You tug on your hair in frustration. “Because I lo—” you stop yourself before the words slip out, but the look on Leon’s face tells you that he knows what you were going to say. 

You turn your head away from him and bite your tongue, trying to hide your wet eyes from him. You can hear him rustling his clothes behind you, pulling his t-shirt and jacket on. 

Leon can’t bring himself to say anything. He knows he should. At the very least, he should just tell you he wants space. You clearly feel something for him that he can’t for you, and you deserve to be let go. But the thought of not having you leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and a pit in his stomach. 

He grabs his wallet off of your nightstand and leaves without so much as a glance at you. As soon as you hear your front door slam, you let yourself fall apart. 

—

The next two weeks is sheer misery for the both of you. 

You hear nothing from Leon, and while it’s not unusual for him to be radio silent for days at a time, this is something else entirely. There’s a constant cloud of anxiety floating around you, and you find yourself checking your phone way too much. 

Leon knows he’s an asshole. His guilt overwhelms him, and it makes it almost impossible to focus on work. To focus on anything other than the image of you, teary eyed and half naked in bed after almost confessing your love to him. 

The words float around his head. He’s always had some feelings for you buried under the surface, but love? That’s such a stupid word. Such a big deal. Love feels like a cage to him, and the idea of being in love? It makes him sick. 

He grabs his phone and opens your contact. He types three words and then deletes them, and types them again, and then deletes them. He should just leave you alone. He’s done enough damage, and he knows if he talks to you again, he’ll have to actually acknowledge his feelings towards you. Towards what you said. 

You wish you could say you’re surprised when he shows up at your door at 3am, almost three weeks after the incident. 

You go to close the door in his face but he catches it with his hand and forces his way inside. 

His blue eyes are stormy and his soft hair is dishevelled. “I just want to talk.”

“I have nothing to say to you, Kennedy.” 

He sucks in a breath at your use of his last name. He’s always been Leon to you, or on some late drunken nights, Scott. This is nothing like those nights, and the warmth he feels at the memories of you are drowned out by the fear in his chest. 

Fear of losing you. Fear of those three fucking words that have been plaguing him for the past three weeks. 

“Please?” His voice is soft, pleading. You’ve never quite heard him like this. 

You keep your back turned to him. You’re not sure if you can even look at him right now, not without remembering how much of an idiot you are, how stupid you are for having these feelings for him. 

“I’m sorry just—look at me, please.”

You turn around impossibly slow, drawing your eyes up from the floor to meet his. He’s dressed casually—a black t-shirt and grey sweatpants, but he looks like a model. Even with his under eye bags and the frown on his face, he’s the prettiest man you’ve ever seen. 

Despite the fact that you’ve spent countless nights together, having his eyes on you still makes you flustered. 

“What were you going to say? That morning, I mean.” 

You fight the urge to raise your voice. “You know what I was going to say, Leon.”

He relaxes slightly when you use his first name. It’s not much, but it’s a start. “So say it now.” 

“I’m not going to say it. I can’t say it.”

“Why not?” 

“Because it’s you, Leon. It’s you and it’s me and god, it’s you. You’ll be out of the country before I even finish my sentence and I—I don’t want to deal with this right now.”

He takes a cautious step forward. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“You can’t just—ugh!” You tug on your hair, blinking back the tears that are threatening to form. “You can’t say that after you walked out on me.”

Leon stays quiet, stormy eyes fixated on you. He’s become something of an expert at reading body language, and he knows you well enough to know you’re about to cry. 

“You’ve spent the past few years insisting that we’re nothing more than what we already are. And now you’re sitting there, looking at me, expecting me to lose everything.”

Leon grabs your shoulders, looking at you seriously. “What do you think you’re going to lose, y/n?”

“You,” your voice is barely a whisper and you choke on the lump in your throat. “I’m going to lose you.”

“Y/n…”

You shake your head, salty tears rolling down your cheeks. You lean your forehead against his chest.

“It’s not fair,” you sob, hitting his chest with your fist. “I just—I can’t.”

Leon catches your wrists in his hand, holding them tightly. “You’re not going to lose me. I know what I said before, and I was wrong.”

You look up at him through teary lashes. You’ve never seen him this vulnerable before. He’s always been quiet and stern and withdrawn, and you’ve gotten used to his silence over the years. So to see him this vulnerable, this vocal….

“I,” he sucks in a breath, “I love you.”

His words echo in your head. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted to hear, and yet you don’t know what to say. 

“That doesn’t change anything.”

“I love you.”

“You’re still going to leave me in the mornings and you’re still going to hate commitment and—”

“Y/n,” he stops you before your thoughts can run wild. “I love you.”

Your heart speeds up at his words. There’s butterflies in your stomach, and for the first time in weeks, you don’t feel ashamed of your feelings. 

“Please say it back,” he practically whimpers. 

You step forwards and wrap your arms around his shoulders, letting your whole body weight fall into his arms. “I love you,” you mumble into his shoulder. 

He pets the back of your head and holds you as close as possible. Love has always seemed like a cage to him, but with you, he’s never felt more free. 

[lottiecrabie]

hiii You know who this is can i please please please have cyosa mutual masturbation i lost so hard every time but once and you know you love meeeee 😇😇😇😇

this is for you🫵you know who you are. I love you🫶

‘matty…’ you moan, half as a beg and half as a mindless need. he chuckles, opening your thighs for him, putting you on display. you’re so ready you might take him right now. 

matty’s hand still dances on your thigh, working higher and higher. your breath hitches, anticipating the fateful meeting. he whispers, smirking, ‘how about you show me how you do it?’

your cheeks flame at the idea. you clench your thighs, trapping him in place, embarrassed. he doesn’t seem too bothered. he revels in prying them open again, grazing the ready skin until you’re squirming.

‘why would i when you’re right here?’ as if to convince him, you reach for his leftover hand, dragging it to a pert breast. he chuckles. his finger rolls the nipple and you sigh, still holding onto his wrist.

‘i want to see,’ he says. ‘i want to learn.’ you groan, half from pleasure and half from shyness. you hide in your shoulder, arching your back into his hand in contradiction. again, a laugh falls from him. ‘how about i show you too?’

your eyes snap to him, suddenly interested. he kneels up, towering over your parting frame. his hand makes quick work of his belt— quicker than your hungry, shaking ones could have done. he draws his cock out without any hesitation, holding it at the base. your breath dies in your throat. you freeze under him.

‘i’m already hard,’ matty says. ‘don’t even have to think about you cause you’re already laying there like a fucking daydream.’

you grin, spreading your legs further, giving him a show. a tortured groan rasps out his throat. ‘fuck, love, you’re gorgeous.’ he strokes himself once, swiping his thumb over the tip. you lick your lips, though you do not feel the need to reach out and do it yourself. you want to relish in the spectacle.

you get him, now. he knows this. says, ‘show me.’

you don’t feel as shy. your hand grabs his own, puppeteering him so he pinches and rolls your peaked nipples just right. a broken moan comes out of you. in turn, he strokes faster.

‘i don’t like the before,’ you choke out. ‘i’d rather just get to it.’ it’s all the warning you give him before you plunge your hand between your folds, circling your clit.

‘shit,’ matty cries. ‘you’re not real.’ you hum, pinching the skin of his wrist mischievously, reveling in his little yelp. ‘what do you think about?’

you shrug, non-committed. ‘i like my mind blank.’ matty tsks and shakes his head. you almost want to laugh, but your fingers hit a sinful spot and you’re too busy whining out.

‘you’re doing it wrong,’ he breathes. his hand is still hard at work on himself. he needs to frown in concentration to get his thought out. ‘the before, the imagination— that’s what it’s all about. you won’t get a mind-blowing orgasm if you don’t involve your mind.’

‘do it, then,’ you whimper. ‘mindblow me.’

he clicks his tongue, shaking his head. ‘i didn’t expect you to be lazy.’ the challenge works and you set your eyes, competitiveness bubbling in your chest. vengefully, you dip two fingers inside, watching as he slows his rhythm in quiet wonder.

you thrust in and out, angling your fingers until your legs twitch mindlessly. your nails dig into his skin, and it’s not even to send any kind of message. he’s wrong about the mind. you masturbate to get you off— off that tyrannical ride your head leads ruthlessly. this, the hot euphoria beating in your veins, the quiet moans, the shivering limbs, is what it’s about.

‘i’ll tell you, then,’ matty says. he seems close, pumping his cock fast and certain. his chest rises and falls, the tattooed planes of his stomach in perfect display. you want to spread a hand over it, want to descend down and replace his hand, want to— you thumb your clit and stop wanting.

‘i think about you, all pretty and hot and needy. never this perfect, though. god, you’re really not real— like a fucking frosted cupcake, all sweet for me.’ the words fizzle up your chest. pleasure strikes through you, doubly so, and you cry his name in sheer shock.

matty continues, ‘i think about you in the library, bending you over until i erase that little worried frown you have. make you suck my fingers so you keep quiet still. don’t want to get banned— still need you to ride my cock on those big chairs after all.’

‘oh, god,’ you whine. you rub your clit furiously, eyes rolling back, seemingly astral projected to the library. your lips part in quiet worship. ‘more,’ you beg him.

matty pinches your nipple, forcing you to look at him. ‘your turn.’

you pant, trying to use your brain when your fingers are deep and quick inside of you, when he’s hanging off with that swoopy hair over his forehead and those dark, hungry eyes. you’re drunk on the mere sight of him, and you start fearing how he’ll affect you when he’s the one thrusting inside you.

‘i—‘ your legs kick, helpless. ‘sometimes when we watched movies, i’d think about you eating me out on the couch.’

matty groans, scrunching his eyes like he’s imagining it. ‘yeah? what’d i do?’

‘just— you’d kneel in front of me, and you’d tell me to pay attention, and then you’d do it. devour me like you were starved. shush me when i got too loud, remind me to watch my smart, pretentious film.’

another broken cry slips out of him. he falls over you, though still holding himself up with an arm. your now free hand spread over his ribs, back, anything your greediness can find. both your fingers work in tandem between your bodies, a quiet union you’ve just now noticed. you roll your head, hit his wrist. ‘matty…’

‘i thought about you asking me to fuck you before,’ matty admits offhandedly, lost in his pleasure. your fingers press into his working shoulder, mean. ‘fuck, i almost believed i was imagining when you really did ask me. figured i was going crazy.’

you twist your head, kissing his wrist over and over, tiny presses of love you don’t dare say. your tongue sticks out and licks it all up before it stays and means something. ‘again,’ you moan, feeling yourself get closer. your hips rise for your strained digits. your body hums in warning.

‘i want to come on your stomach. want to mark your skin— god, need it. need to see you all pretty with my cum, make you all messy. show you’re mine.’

‘matty,’ you scream, pumping your fingers just right.

’need to see you come, too. break apart so you’re not so perfect. my pristine, pretty girl, drooling for me, screaming my name, working those little fingers…’

‘fuck—‘

‘you’re doing so well for me,’ he promises. his hand has lost any sense of regular rhythm, pumping with desperate abandon instead. ‘just like i though,’ he says, full of wonder. he seems so gone you’d figure he’s all in his head, but matty stares at you like he could lick up the frost off the cupcake. ‘of course you’d listen. of course you’d do just i say.’

‘fuck, i need—‘ it’s on the tip of your tongue, but you don’t get to say, a shattering orgasm taking you instead.

you open your jaw and dig your teeth in matty’s wrist, biting down the yells as waves of pure ecstasy shake through you. your head, never quite unattached before, blanks with the force of pleasure. you say his name, you think. or maybe not. in the end, you don’t think at all, and it is glorious.

matty’s close after you, screaming out your name shamelessly. the ropes of white cum hit your stomach and he draws out his last trembles before he falls atop you with a sigh.

your head’s all fuzzy as you lay there. ‘oh,’ you finally say once you regain speech. you trace a finger over his back, staring at the ceiling in quiet contemplation. oh, this is what it’s supposed to be.

‘yeah,’ matty murmurs in your hair. because he understands, of course he does. your lungs feel full and heavy.

he finally rises and you catch a glance to the mess between your two bodies. the cum is painted over both of your stomach. though matty doesn’t even bother wiping it off before he smirks, kissing down your sternum. his eyes flash up at you, full of mischief. ‘so you want me to eat you out, huh?’

[damned-punk]

Hello to my favorite Punk ❤️

May i request a story where Kidd is exhibitionist and Killer is a voyeuyr who are both interested in the reader?

Bonus points if Kidd is a little nervous and Killer has to give him a peptalk before they meet up with the reader.

The Show (Kidd x Reader x Killer)

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Content Warning: nsfw, exhibitionist!Kidd, voyeur!Killer

Content Description: f!reader overhears a rather vague conversation between her partners and finds herself in an interesting position later in the evening ♡

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You’d noticed that both the Captain and his first mate, who’d recently established their mutual feelings for you, had been very cautious around the subject of more intimate activities. Kidd would make inappropriate jokes and Killer would offer very provocative comments, but it seemed like they were shying away from the impending activities that were always only moments away from occurring. It could be frustrating at times, being worked up only for the night to end with you alone in your cabin with your thoughts. It was a difficult situation to navigate so on one slow evening at sea, you resolved to have a conversation with them about it.

You made your way to the door of Kidd’s workshop to find it slightly cracked open, the room vacant and somewhat organized which was a sure sign that he hadn’t been there for at least a little while. This was unusual, it was the perfect kind of day for his tinkering inclinations and it just didn’t make sense for him to be anywhere else. You carried yourself to the starboard of the ship, walking across the nearly desolate deck and into the hallway that housed doors to meeting and storage rooms. At the end of the hall, light glimmered from beneath one of the doors. You could make out Kidd’s voice but not his words, something that prompted you to quietly draw closer in an effort to conceal your presence.

“…and if she doesn’t?”, you listened to the Captain’s voice, catching the middle of his conversation.

“We stop and don’t press her about it.”, Killer replied, your curiosity surmounting, “She already knows we’re interested and we know she feels the same. I don’t understand why you’re making this so difficult.”

“I don’t want to overwhelm her and fuck this up.”, Kidd replied quickly, “How the hell are we even supposed to approach this? (Y/N) might not have any experience and even if she does, there’s no guarantee this’ll be something she wants to try.”

“It’ll be fine either way. If it’s a hard no, we move on. If she wants to try, we’ll proceed.”, Killer retorted, “You’re making this way harder than it has to be.”

“She needs a safe word-“, the Captain started again, his first mate cutting him off almost immediately.

“Kidd.”, Killer began, “That’ll come naturally. If you start the conversation by asking her for a safe word, you really are going to fuck this up.”

Your mind was swimming with anticipation as to what had Kidd so worked up, especially considering that it involved you. What did they want to do that warranted a safe word? Killer was always so calm and collected so his demeanor was totally unsurprising, but you’d never known Kidd to shy away from anything. Going against your initial inclinations, you decided to hold out and see what fate would bring instead of approaching them yourself. It was apparent that they’d been having similar thoughts to your own, only in a different context.

“I’m thinking tonight after dinner, I’ll tell her we need to talk with her. It’d be best if you were already in the room so it’s not as awkward.”, Killer divulged Kidd with his plan.

“Alright, after dinner it is then.”, you heard the Captain say, followed by the sounds of moving chairs as they stood to leave.

You immediately returned to your cabin and replayed their conversation in your mind several times over. Feelings of excitement, anxiousness, and interest flooded your thoughts. This was a much better scenario than having to painstakingly press them for the reason behind their reservations. Taking it upon yourself to prepare for what may come, you changed into something more comfortable and skipped dinner on account of your nerves. The evening seemed to be flying by and when heavy boots approached your door, a fluttering feeling erupted in your belly. Three knocks sounded which prompted you to spring to your feet, swinging the door open to find Killer leant against the frame. Your size difference was exaggerated by his posture, an observation that caused your face to flush several shades of red.

“Hey babe, Kidd and I wanted to run something by you if you’ve got a minute.”, he stated, your heart racing.

“Of course!”, you smiled up at him, following his long strides back to their shared cabin.

Kidd sat shirtless at the foot of the bed, a very intimidating smirk plastered on his face. His posture was in stark contrast to the worry in his voice just hours prior, a factor that worked to intensify the situation. You sat on the love seat that faced the bed awaiting the fabricated conversation, an action that prompted Killer to click his tongue.

“That’s my seat.”, he made his way to stand before you, “Go sit with the Captain, sweetheart.”

“Yeah, come over here babe.”, Kidd’s voice caught your attention, his massive hand patting his lap.

The energy in the room shifted as Killer assumed his position on the couch, leaning back and getting comfortable as though he anticipated to be sat there for a while. You attempted to sit beside Kidd on the mattress only to be scooped into his lap, your back resting against his front as you tilted your head up inquisitively. The Captain let his hand wander, mindlessly kneading the flesh of your thigh and hip while Killer watched intently.

“So… what d-did you want to talk about?”, you asked, stumbling over your words while trying desperately to ignore the intense warmth of your partner’s embrace.

“I think Killer could use some entertainment, don’t you think?”, Kidd proposed, ultimately catching you by surprise.

“What do you mean?”, you asked rhetorically, already having an idea of their intended depravity.

“Well…”, Kidd started to explain, rocking backwards a bit and moving your legs to rest on either side of his own, “Having you all pretty and squirming in my lap would be a great start. Is that okay?”

His words wracked through your mind, something akin to shell-shock rippling through your veins. You couldn’t find the words to respond, only nodding your head in approval as he let his hand wander beneath the waistband of your bottoms. Wasting no time, he worked his fingers in soft circles over your clit. Wrestling with a mixture of pleasure and embarrassment, you closed your eyes in an attempt to quell your shyness.

You heard Killer stand, the sound of footsteps approaching and stopping just in front of you imploring you to open your eyes. Killer loomed over you and placed a hand on your chin, leaning closer until his mask was nearly brushing against your face while Kidd’s ministrations continued. A sudden slap on your bottom caused you to gasp, it didn’t hurt at all but was totally unexpected.

“Keep your eyes open.”, Killer commanded, “There’s no reason to hide, I won’t get to see my pretty girl if you do.”

Kidd laughed from behind you as Killer reassumed his seated position. Killer’s words turned you into jelly, you wanted him so badly. It was evident that this whole encounter was the result of their shared kink, but a part of you wished to have both of them participate at the same time. When your legs started involuntarily trembling, Kidd halted his motions and moved you to rest on your back against the comforter. He removed your bottoms and rested your feet against his shoulders as he dipped his head between your thighs. You were already so close and the change of sensation from his calloused fingers to soft tongue left you grasping at his hair for support. He groaned against your folds, reveling in how good he was making you feel. Your belly tightened and your muscles spasmed as you climaxed against his lips, your whimpers and moans carrying a lewd symphony to their ears. Kidd kissed his way up your abdomen and to your lips, sloppily sucking each bit of flesh he could reach while aligning himself at your entrance.

“You ready?”, he asked gruffly, well aware of his size and the necessary patience needed to fit.

“Yes, Captain.”, you replied, gazing up at his disheveled state through half-lidded eyes.

The use of his superlative in such a vulnerable and intimate space sent him over the edge. Kidd needed to be as close to you as possible in that moment. He thrusted himself forward and watched your beautiful face contort as he stretched you open. Your panting surmounted into pornographic sounds as he picked up the pace, his heavy balls slapping against your ass with every snap of his hips.

“K-Kidd!”, you stuttered out, gripping him tightly for support.

“You can take it, (Y/N). You’re such a good girl.”, Killer encouraged you, his words of praise causing you to flutter around your Captain.

“Killer, please!”, you called out to him somewhat involuntarily, shocking yourself and your partners in the process.

“I don’t fuckin’ think so.”, it was Kidd’s turn to land a firm hand on your ass, “Don’t say his name, you’re taking my cock.”

Kidd’s continued muttering of filthy phrases left you trembling beneath him again, the sudden squeezes of your walls around his length urging him to climax. He pressed his forehead to yours as his pace steadied to a halt, the incredible feeling of fullness leaving you unable to move and at his mercy. After several moments, he removed himself from you and watched intently as his arousal pooled onto the sheets below. You couldn’t look at either of them, your more rational thoughts returning as you came back down from such an intense high. Killer made his way to you while Kidd left to clean himself up and ready the bathroom for you. The clicking of his mask caught your attention and your expression softened when you saw his face. He was smiling down at you so sweetly, his hands meeting your hips and offering a gentle massage to stifle any lingering aches resulting from Kidd’s grip.

“How do you feel?”, Killer asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

“Fine.”, you replied quietly, exhausted and ready to be asleep between your partners for the rest of the night.

“I would prefer for you to feel good, but I suppose fine works too.”, he pressed his lips to your own, “I love you, (Y/N).”

“I love you too, Kill.”, you smiled up at him, feeling very secure and exponentially more relaxed than you had at the start of the day.

“Don’t you have something to say to me?”, Kidd grumbled from the bathroom door, obviously wanting to be included in some of the soft affection.

You and Killer shared a knowing glance, giggling at how soft Kidd’s heart really was. It was so sweet and you felt so thankful be able to call them yours. Nothing could compare to the connection that the three of you shared and you couldn’t wait to see what the future held in store.

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[coryosbaby]

mutual masturbation with step brother!ethan? 🫠😣

Warning: stepcest (stepbrother x stepsister), dark Ethan landry, manipulation, slight dubcon, reader is of age, grinding, mutual masturbation, weird references to being siblings ig, praise kink, cum play, dom! Ethan, sub!reader, slightly innocent! Reader

Its not uncommon for Ethan to have sleepovers in your room.

Both of your parents don’t approve, and for good reason. Neither trust Ethan to be on his best behavior after the untying your bikini top ‘as a joke’ incident (he had apologized to you by buying you ice cream and a new dress).

But it’s really not going to stop him from knocking on your door, regardless. No matter how much you protest.

“Relax, baby,” he says to you, as he shoves himself inside your pretty pink room. It’s not uncommon for him to call you baby, either. It’s his nickname for you. “That’s why we keep it a secret, right? And if we get caught, I’ll tell them it was my idea. Promise.”

“But I don’t want to get you in trouble, E.” You frown, and he sits down beside you on your bed and begins to stroke your hair soothingly.

“It’ll be okay. Just be a good girl and have a sleepover with me tonight, yeah?” He smiles when you bring his hand into yours, and you nod with flushed cheeks. “C’mere, sis. We can watch a movie.”

And you do, your body layed between his spread thighs as his arms rest on your stomach. He draws light circles into your belly as you giggle at something on the screen. You lean back into him more; he smells really nice. It overclouds your senses and makes you bury your face in his neck.

“Needy?” He teases, when you bring your hands up to his hair.

Your brows furrow in confusion.

“For what?”

“Nevermind, sweetheart. Just watch the movie.”

And then that’s that. But then the climax starts showing, and that’s when you begin to get sleepy.

And maybe a little horny, too. Because when you adjust and feel Ethan’s cock against your lower back, you begin to subconsciously grind into it.

The boy inhales, his grip on you tightening. You feel his dick getting hard, bigger. You ache from the feeling, and you begin to hump your little pussy onto the bed. The action is so naive and virginal that when Ethan notices he lets out a whine.

“Fuck. Look at you, you dirty girl.”

Ethan’s voice reminds you of the situation you’re both in. Your mind comes back to its senses, and you pull away from his grasp. Your eyes are wide as you crawl to the end of the bed in shock.

What the fuck just happened? He’s your brother, for god’s sake!

(Well, stepbrother. But that doesn’t make it any better.)

Ethan looks confused and tries to reach for you, but you yank yourself away.

“We can’t do that, Eth. W-We can’t..”

He sighs, hands coming up to run his hands through his hair.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.”

He’s not sorry. He just wants you to think he is, because he knows you’re the one thing he’s not: a person who follows the rules. And he knows that you’ll do whatever it takes to make your mom and his dad happy. And that includes not fucking your stepbrother.

But you’ll also do anything to make Ethan happy. He’s your best friend, after all. The one who cares for you the most.

And that’s when Ethan gets the idea.

He smirks to himself, and adjusts his body to lean back against the bed frame. His hand goes down to massage his covered cock. And then, he slips it down into his sweats. He groans, his eyes making their way to yours. You’re shocked, face intensely heated and pussy starting to throb.

“W-What are you doing? Eth, c’mon…”

“Don’t you love me?” His gaze brings a heat to your neck, and he bites his lip and fucks into his hand when he sees your innocent eyes looking at his clothed cock.

“O-Of course I do! I-I’d do anything for you!”

Ethan pouts, tilting his head. “I don’t think you would. Your big brother needs help, and you’re not helping him.. doesn’t seem like you love me at all.”

“I really really do! I-It’s just that.. I don’t want mom and dad to find out, and-”

“They won’t find out if you’re quiet, angel.” He replies. You bite your lip, thinking over your parents rules.

“But mom and dad don’t like this kind of stuff. We’ll get in trouble if we do anything..”

“No, no, no, you sweet dumb thing.” he looks down at your body as he speaks, and you squirm under his gaze. “As long as we don’t touch each other, it doesn’t count. Okay?”

You think it through , and in the end Ethan’s gorgeous face wins you over. You nod, slowly. And then Ethan is grinning at you.

“That’s my girl.”

Your breathing begins to waver, and you bite your lip as he takes out his fat cock. You know you shouldn’t look, but you do. He begins to stroke the head, the tip dripping with precum, and you inhale shakily.

“You’re so fuckin’ perfect, y’know that?” Ethan breathes. “Why don’t you take that nightgown off and let me see you how pretty you are?”

“O-Okay…”

Your fingers nervously fumble with the silky slip, and you pull it over your head. Your body is revealed to him, only your pink lacy underwear covering your most intimate parts. Ethan groans. Your hands go up to cover your tits, feeling incredibly exposed.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Ethan coos. “It’s just me. It’s just your big brother…”

That shouldn’t make your pussy begin to ache for touch, but it does. And when he demands that you move your hands, you slowly obey. Your tits are exposed, nipples flushed and puffy.

“I’ve never…” you frown. “I’ve never done this before. Could you show me what to do?”

Ethan smiles. “Of course, angel.”

He stops touching himself, instead moving to gently adjust your body as he pleases. You moan when he pulls your ankles over his thighs, your body now laid between his spread legs. His aching prick is so close to your cunt that you can feel the heat radiating off of it. You’ve never felt this euphoric, never felt this kind of intimacy, and it makes you gush onto your panties.

Ethan’s finger teasingly ghosts over your clit, and you whine in protest.

“N-No touching, E. Remember?”

He chuckles. “Right. ‘M sorry, honey.”

“‘S okay…”

He smiles. “Can you take off your underwear?”

You nod, hands coming down to rest on your waistband and pull the thin garment down. You throw them to the other side of the bed, and when your arousal hits Ethan’s nose, he lets out a groan.

“You smell so fuckin’ good.”

“Thank you..”

And then he’s telling you directions, teaching you to rub your clit and stick your fingers inside yourself. You whine at the friction against your puffy little clit, and Ethan begins to touch himself again.

You watch the thick skin of his cock as it moves over his tip, watches the precum that drips on the sheets below the both of you. Your whole body is on fire, skin electric and buzzing.

“Eth… wan’ you so bad. I love you so much!” You babble. Ethan moans, his slick cock making wet noises in the otherwise quiet room. You can feel your first orgasm of the night moving in on you, and your hips chase your hand as it moves against your clit.

“I love you too, sweet girl. Fuck.. are you gonna cum? Hm? ”

“Yes, yeah. Mm.. fuck!” The coil in your belly snaps, and your eyes roll to the back of your head as you cum. Ethan looks at you through clenched teeth, his hand speeding up on himself.

“God. My precious little girl, doin’ so good.. ‘m gonna cum all over this pussy. That what you want?”

You nod eagerly, spreading your pussy lips apart and moving your body further to him.

It’s not exactly touching. So where’s the wrong in it? Besides, your pussy is so swollen, begging for another orgasm, and begging to be filled. Ethan’s hips thrust up, and he growls as he empties his load onto your wet little cunt. You clench at the feeling of his warm seed hitting your hole, coating you in him. He bites his lip, looking down at how well he’s marked you.

And then, he grabs your thighs and dives down into your pussy. You mewl at the feeling of his tongue pushing his cum back inside you.

Fuck it. Where’s the fun in following the rules, anyway?

[aroace-poly-show]

hello friends we are starting this kind of early cause i have. a lot of mutuals. so. taking in requests now for the

marlo mutual christmas/winter gift doodles

putting this above the read more so people see it: ‼️‼️you do not need to celebrate christmas for this!! if you’re one of my mutuals that doesn’t celebrate christmas but you still want one you are still included ‼️‼️and if you really don’t want one then just like the post without commenting please ‼️‼️ otherwise i might assume you just haven’t seen the post and dm you to be sure aifbksnfnd (or let me know directly. comment or dm or ask or whatever you want. i just need to know that you’ve seen it and don’t want one)

i did this last year. really simple concept. you give me a few characters you like and i will draw a silly little doodle for you and send you an ask (or dm or tag you in a post with if i can’t send it in an ask for whatever reason) on christmas day!! i will have this post queued to go up multiple times a day so hopefully people don’t miss it sorry if it gets annoying fast LMAO

some answers to potential questions and clarifications here:

-you are not required to give me a doodle in return, you can if you want but you do not have to!! there is no pressure to!!! if you do want to make a return gift though then characters i like i’ll list them at the bottom

-begging you. if we’re mutuals and you want one pleaseeeee respond in the comments. it keeps things all in one place for me, and if i am not sure whether you want one or not i will just ask you directly and i get Anxious so if you want to save yourself the trouble of me bothering you in dms for it pleaseeee don’t feel like you’re not included in this, and just comment on the post

-id appreciate like. a handful of characters you’d be happy to receive a doodle of and not just One, since i might have trouble drawing some and i don’t wanna send you a really shitty doodle or stress myself out trying to get it right in time fjnskdnsk

-they do not have to be characters i know about!! literally any you like!!

-i’m doing this really early so i can give myself enough time for it but if you change your mind on the characters before just let me know!!

ummm. if i need to add more i will. but i think that’s it for now!! praying i’ll actually be able to go through with this i am so sorry if i end up having to give stuff out late 💔💔

anyway if you really do want to give me one in return. i think i’m pretty obvious about who i like and you’re free to do others i didn’t mention here that you know i like too, but here’s a few jic anyone wants a list: anyone from wonderlands x showtime, mafuyu asahina, basil from omori, vflower, siffrin, loop, mirabelle

[bridgetotheskyyy]

chapter five.

masterlist

Chapter summary: Your father arrives, the end of the month draws near, and you and Gaara hit some milestones . . .

Chapter warnings: 18+, smut (THATS RIGHT YOU GUYSS), lots of angst, physical sickness

Word count: 12k

A/N: full notes on ao3! Pls let me know if you find any errors tumblr hates me (and I hate tumblr <3333)

Read on ao3 here:

You knew it was him, though his back was to you. For you had been walking behind him all your life.

An entourage of personal guards surrounded your father. Cyclone. The strongest band of ninja from the Oasis village. All of them carried shields fashioned like scorpion pedipalps. Face masks covered all but their eyes. In the center was your father. The elders listened with rapt attention as he raconteured some epic story containing a dragon with arms outstretched and a stentorian voice. Baki sat among them, his eye shifting between you and Father. Neither Kankuro nor Temari were present yet. 

“Ahh,” said Ebizo. “And here is Lord Kazekage now.”

Your father turned to see who had come, his eyes widening underneath the disk of his village head hat; they were devoid of the madness you were accustomed to seeing in them. 

“(Y/n) …” Father ignored Gaara to marvel at you. He strolled, arms wide, to you. “My angel.”

He roped arms around you; you suppressed a flinch. He parted to caress your face. “I’ve been blind without the light of your smile,” he said. 

“Father …” Your voice was high with hope. “I’ve … I’ve missed you.”

“Not nearly as much as I have missed you, my star.” His voice hadn’t been this gentle in addressing you since you were a child, lulled to sleep by the bounce of his knee. “How I managed in the dark, I will never know.”

Gaara bowed to him. “I have hoped to meet you for a very long time, Lord Boutoku.”

“Oh, son-in-law.” Your father strode toward Gaara, arms ready to embrace him. “You are the splitting image of the fourth Kazekage himself.”

He enveloped Gaara as everyone watched, not sure of what to say. 

“Come,” Father urged. “There’s much to discuss.”

Your father’s Cyclone parted down the middle to admit the three of you. You followed Gaara to the table, but your father remained on his feet. 

“It is a shame Lady Ikanago is absent,” Ebizo said. “She would have relished this the very most.”

“There will be more than enough time for me to become acquainted with the Sand’s dignitaries, surely,” your father said.

“Lord Boutoku was just telling us about the customs of your village,” Baki told you. 

“Yes,” your father said. “Now —“

The door burst open. Temari and Kankuro came through.

“Don’t start without us —!”

“Kankuro, get off my foot —!”

“Ahh,” your father said, “and this must be Lord Kazekage’s eldest sister.”

Their eyes widened before they hastened to compose themselves, hands going behind their backs. 

“Uh — yes.” Temari bowed. “A pleasure.”

“It’s very nice to see you again, Lord Boutoku,” Kankuro said.

“The feeling is mutual,” your father said. “Come, come. Now that we’re all here, we can discuss the wedding at last. But first.” Your father clapped his hands, and a servant knelt at his side, offering something in his hands. Your father took it to give to you. “Your mother made me promise to pass this on to you when the time came, and I infringe upon her memory if I withhold it from you a moment longer.”

A small velvet box. You opened it: a ring.

Your mother’s ring.

“It’s beautiful,” Gaara said.

You gawked at the miraculous rock for a few seconds longer before slowly raising your head to your father. He had loved no one in the world more than her. Hideo a close second (and you last, probably). Warmth blanketed over your entire being as Father squeezed your hand.

“I am sure Lord Kazekage had his own plans for securing a ring. I hope he does not mind,” he said, eyes soft on you.

“Not at all,” Gaara interjected. “The Oasis is very loyal to its traditions; I suspected something like this may happen.”

And he gently took the ring box from your hand as the members of the council watched, entranced by the sight of Gaara taking the ring from the box and sliding it over your finger. 

You raised your hand to the light; the ring shone like a star he’d pricked from the sky just for your finger. You observed the scene, as if it had been plucked from one of your daydreams. Gaara before you, your father blessing it all, Kankuro, Temari, and Baki smiling. 

“I’m … so happy,” You said, choked with emotion. “Thank you, Father, I — Thank you …!”

“What a blessed union,” Ebizo said. “Hopefully, Lord Boutoku will be open to answering a few of our questions?”

“Of course,” Father boomed. “Of course!”

Your father spoke of the traditions of your village. Dual colors were decided on, a mixture of the Sand’s beige with your village’s blue, along with the special foods that have become specialties in the Oasis. By the end, there was a layout for the reception, who would be coming and then seated where. 

It was surprisingly fun for you. Temari had taken it upon herself to bring a binder to keep the information safe and at hand. You were waiting for your father to pause in the event of possible objections, but it obviously wasn’t necessary; the council was besotted with your father, hanging on his every word as he circled the council’s oval table as though lecturing them.

“Now,” Father sighed dramatically with a pat of his thigh, “if the council would oblige me, the trip here was excessive, and I am not as young as I used to be …”

“Of course,” Ryusa said. “A period of rest is warranted now.”

A Sand guard appeared by Gaara’s side to whisper, “It’s time, Lord Kazekage.”

Gaara nodded as you frowned, confused. It hit you: Matsuri. 

“Gaara,” You murmured. “I want to come. I know this will be hard for you.”

“And I would like you to be with us.” Gaara lowered his head. “But perhaps it’s better for you to stay and reconnect with your father.”

A few seconds and you said, “Okay.”

“And,” Gaara smiled, “perhaps excise a few details?”

You chuckled. “Will do.” 

You gave Gaara’s arm a reassuring squeeze before he raised from his seat, Kankuro and Temari following him. 

“I’ll send one of them to tell you how things went,” Gaara said. 

You nodded and watched the three of them leave. By the time you turned your attention back to the council, it was disbanding. Your father came to you. 

“I finally have you to myself, my dove,” he said. “Lord Kazekage has fixed me with my own quarters. Come along. We have much to talk about.”

You didn’t know what to expect as you entered your father’s private room. Similar to yours, save for the luxuries yours didn’t possess (which, you were sure, was Temari’s doing in an effort to impress him). A fireplace crackled in the quiet space, dousing amber light on the sitting room floor as the curtains were drawn. Two plush loveseats faced each other, separated by a rug and a coffee table. A large bed sectioned off in the corner. 

Your father followed you in, Chuuyou on his tail. 

“These knees.” Your father sank into a couch with a pained sigh. “Never get old, (Y/n). Promise me that.”

“I promise,” You said simply to obey.

“Chuuyou.” Father turned to him. “I applaud you for protecting my daughter, as you have. You have made both your village and head proud.”

“Thank you, my lord.” Chuuyou bowed his head, both out of respect and, though he could not hide it from you, to conceal his guilty expression.

He’s still thinking about the beach.

Seconds passed in silence. You sat across from Father, feeling as though it was what he was waiting for, and remained stock still. Another sigh from him. He appeared aged in a way he never had to you before. 

“Despite all my orders,” he said after a century, “you still have not tried to poison him.”

Oh no. You balled your fists in your lap. You shrank into yourself, desperate to make yourself smaller.

“I’m sorry.” You hung your head. “I’m sorry I disobeyed, I … I just couldn’t.”

“… Thank the gods.”

You looked up. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I have been rash.” Father ran a hand over his face. “There is more benefit to you marrying the Kazekage than there could ever be in disposing of him.” 

“But …” Hope, once again, sat tentatively inside of you, unsure of its place in this conversation. “What about Hideo?” 

There it was — the insane look common in your father’s eye rushed into his irises, all for it to disappear as quickly as it had come. Father lowered his gaze, his entire being depressed and deflated, and for a moment you felt the full weight of your father’s losses like it was yours. And in a way, it was.

“I have lost a great deal, by living in the past,” your father said. “I refuse to lose anything else … It was a mistake to send you here under such nefarious pretenses.”

“Father …” You were so quick to tears lately and now was no different. You couldn’t believe it. Relief and sympathy raised within you. The vice, wrapped around your heart always, fell away.

“Just tell me one thing,” he said, looking up at you finally. “Do you think you may come to love him?” 

You thought, now, of Gaara, and the unobstructed path that now led to him. 

“Yes.”

Matsuri was relocated to the Sunagakure prison later that day. Multiple accounts of her espousing her jealousy and displeasure of Gaara’s imminent marriage to you had reached a variety of ears, and, with all the evidence against her and no more cards to play, her guilt was obvious.

In the midst of all of this, all you wanted to do was go to Gaara — to be there for him and because, freed from your bond of violence, you ached for him — but you fought against it. Surely what he needed now was time to breathe. Despite knowing so little of her, you knew Matsuri had been his student, and to watch her fall into treason due to personal feelings had to be traumatic.

You just wanted to be out of the way. You couldn’t shake the feeling this was partially your fault to begin with. You kept to your room, unsure of what to do with all this free time and lack of anxiety. You couldn’t believe you were free. You admired the little piece of sky sparkling on your finger. You only had the slightest recollections of your mother wearing it as she held you, tending to your tiny body and needs.

 You held your ring finger with a tenderness mirroring hers, sat at your windowsill as evening sighed into night, the soft whistling of the wind brushing past a village at peace, when a knock ripped you from your reverie.

You straightened. “Come in.”

You expected a maid who’d come to tell you dinner was ready, but — 

“Are you all right?”

You startled. Gaara shut the door behind him, never taking his eyes off you, and let himself into your room. He was without his Kage robes, dressed in his trench coat. 

“Gaara,” You said, astonished. A pause. 

“I’ve not seen you all day.”

“I thought it best to stay away,” You said. “Are you all right?”

His eyes rounded with clarity. “You’ve heard.”

“Maids like to gossip.”

He was quiet for a second. He looked away. “It is done.” 

“I am so sorry.” You removed yourself from the window seat and crossed the room to him. You folded your arms, having it awkward to have them simply dangle there, and you weren’t sure if Gaara would like to be touched.

Gaara’s head hung still. He looked so aggrieved, tiredness lining his face. 

“What happened?” You asked carefully.

“There was an abundance of evidence,” Gaara began. “The elders were especially hard on her. Matsuri cried a great deal.” His hands clenched at his sides. “She kept saying it wasn’t her and that she’d been framed, yet there was nothing she could do or say to defend herself.” 

You sat on your bed. “Sit with me,” You said, patting the space beside you. 

When he did, he continued: “I forgive her.” Gaara turned to you. “Please do not let this taint your view of who she is. She is still a very talented and gifted shinobi.”

“I won’t.” You shook your head. Despite the anger you felt for Matsuri at the last meeting with the council, it had long since passed, and all you felt was a hollowness for the man beside you, his aggrieved bewilderment your own. 

Gaara gazed into his lap, invisible brows furrowed by sorrow. “I … am still perplexed as to how this could have happened … Matsuri … But I also know love is a powerful force that can make people act contrary to themselves.” His hand inched toward yours, resting on your lap. “I know because … though I felt sympathy for Matsuri, I feel as though my heart wasn’t with her.” He looked up at you. “It was with you.”

“Gaara …” You held his hand. You were beyond flattered, and, with the new conditions you were under, you felt you could really lean into the reserved but true affection Gaara was giving you. You, now, lived in the serene turquoise of his eyes as the faintest of smiles crossed his face.

“I wanted to return to you to be by your side. All I could think about was you today, and the ring … Our future.” He rose from the bed, your hand still in his. “Come. There is something I’d like to show you.”

“Of course,” You said, curiosity lilting your voice.

Gaara led you down hallways. You realized you had never been to this area of the palace before. It was a more secluded part of the palace, quieter; nothing but a simple vase potting an enormous plant by the new, mysterious doorway you were led through. 

He led you to a door, and all clicked into place for you.

His room. Gaara’s room.

At that moment, you realized you had never actually been to Gaara’s room. You couldn’t even tell anyone where it was in the palace. Sweat pressed against your palms. Warm light filled the room, but it was bare save for a simple wooden desk, a lamp, a bed, a carpet — but what caught your attention was the collection of cacti on the desk.

Definitely Gaara’s room.

He let you in first and you heard him close the door behind him as you took it in with a small smile. 

You turned to him. “What do you want me for?”

“I invited you here because I wished to see you in private,” Gaara said. “I want to be alone with you. I’ve …missed having you by my side since the tent. I’ve never had anyone so close to me for so long.” Color came to Gaara’s cheeks. “As a couple,” he began, approaching you, “we should be sharing a room — and a bed.” 

You turned to it, conspicuously wide enough for the two of you. You stared. Nothing was keeping you from Gaara now. 

“Then perhaps we should make it truly ours.”

Gaara searched your face, your meaning lost on him, as you approached. 

This time, you kissed him.

You cupped the back of his head, where crimson hair ran between your fingers. When Gaara reciprocated, your legs weakened, but he kept you steady with all the strength with which you’d been familiarized.

You had not realized your feet were moving backwards until the slight jab at the back of your knees. 

With a whimper, you fell backward. Gaara quickly caught you. You sat on the bed, scooting away from him, which he took as a beckon to follow. You sighed when your head pressed into the pillows. Gaara blanketed your body with his, his lips possessing yours a second time. 

You moaned, opened your mouth for his tongue to come play with yours. You welcomed the pressure of his body on top of you, your hands once again losing themselves in his hair as he flicked and nibbled against your lips. 

“Show me,” Gaara moaned against your jawline, his tone raw and commanding as your hands scaled his back. “Show me everything from the books. I want to know everything.”

“That could take a while,” You hummed, your lips parting as he nibbled at your flushed skin. But we have time. We have all the time in the world.

“Then you should start now.” Gaara nibbled on your neck. Your heels dug into his calves as his wet tongue swept over the vulnerable skin. 

You fumbled, pulling yourself out from under Gaara to work your shirt over your head, grappling with the deja vu you felt as you tossed it aside. You couldn’t wait. You couldn’t. Gaara awkwardly fumbled with the buttons of his trench coat until you assisted. 

So many layers. You shed your pants away, now down to your underwear. You had never let another see you this naked before, let alone nude, besides your maids, and there were no secrets amongst women. But somehow, you were not nervous as you unhooked your bra. Gaara’s motions had stilled to a stop. Flutters went straight to your cunt with the way his eyes scanned you, hungry, as it slowly unfolded before him. 

Your panties hung around one bare ankle when Gaara brushed a hand over your leg. He hooked fingers under your panties to pull them away himself and onto the floor.

“I want to touch you.” His tone was impossibly husky, low. His hand traveled from your leg to your inner thigh.

You laid back down for him. You were completely bare for him now, you realized, as his eyes roved hungrily over your naked flesh. Gaara’s head settled over your chest, pressing kisses against the valley of your breast, one hand preoccupied with your nipple —

“Mm …!” You arched into him. Gaara’s teeth grazed against another nipple. His curious tongue swirled against the rising bud. You heard the buckles of his uniform unfastening as your head sunk in the pillows, and you knew he was in the midst of shedding the remainder of his gear as he busied with your breasts. His naked skin pressed against your thighs. Your cunt throbbed, maddening you to be touched. 

Thankfully, Gaara’s curiosity worked in your favor; his lips traveled down your skin, brushing over a nipple before sliding past the bones of your ribcage. His hands hooked over the fat of your thighs, the soft brush of your pubic hair grazing his chin.

“I remember, in the books …” Gaara’s thumb gently spread one lip, your juices surely leaking over. “The man tastes the woman. I want to taste you, too.”

Your heart skipped; Gaara’s hot breath hit your lips. “He licks up the valley of her lips …”  .

You gasped. You realized what he was doing; he was quoting Icha Icha.

His lips flicked experimentally at your folds. You flinched, a knee knocking his head.

He paused to examine you. “Does it feel good?”

“Yes, Gaara …” You gripped one of Gaara’s shoulders to compel him forward, excitement causing you to flutter. “It feels so good …”

Not needing to be told twice, he sank down, gave your folds a series of licks. You could feel him pause to taste your juices before starting again. 

“Good …” he murmured. “So good … If I’d known …”

“Keep going …!”

You lost a hand in his hair. Gaara was eating you. It was unreal. His hot breath on your lips, his open palms spreading your thighs open, was something right out of your wildest dreams. He ate you gently, experimenting with this new territory that was you. You were more than happy to oblige, spreading your legs wider to become more accessible to him in a way you have never been with any man before him. You gripped the sheets at his sudden kisses, the unsuspected swipes of his tongue. His fingers gently spread and kneaded at your labia, exploring you and overstimulating you in the process.

Gaara came up, accidentally brushing a nose against your clit —

You cried out. You pressed him into your cunt. A quick learner, he tested the tip of his tongue against the nub, coaxing another series of moans from you. Your eyes doubled back as he latched on to your clit, the suction of his lips driving you wild.

You writhed underneath him. Your hands rubbed over his hands as he lapped up your juices. 

“Oh — use — Gaara, you have to use your — your fingers, oh!” 

Gaara paused momentarily, as though something had occurred to him. 

“She welcomed his fingers like old friends into her heat …”

You felt his thumb brush against your folds. It pressed farther in until it breached the entrance of your hole.

“Gaara …!” You pulled at his hair.

He grunted but did nothing to stop you, teasing your entrance with his thumb as his tongue swirled around your clit. Your legs trembled, your back arching off the bed and into his willing mouth. Your juices seeped past the fat of your behind, only for Gaara to reach down to collect it with his tongue.

His breath quickened as he replaced his thumb with a finger, pressing it in —

“Ahh! Ha—aha!” A familiar tightness was tormenting your abdomen. Close, close. You tried to think through your haze; if you could just get him to … “Another, please, and — and curl them up, oh —“

“I will …!”

He obeyed with a soft growl, adding another finger into your slippery heat. Your strangled breath coincided with his fingers sinking in. So full, but not enough. You ached for more, bucking your hips in desperation. As instructed, he brought his fingers up in beckoning —

“Aah!” 

Gaara’s tongue returned to your clit, curling his fingers again and again, your juices seeping, slipping past his digits. You rocked into his fingers, finding a rhythm with him. 

He sucked and kissed your clit, fingers beckoning one final time —

You cried out, clutching at him with both hands. You clenched over his fingers, the walls around them becoming rougher and tighter as your climax came. You shuddered, biting your lip. Gaara was not stopping, inciting wave after wave through you until you plateaued. Pleasure crashed back down around you, forcing you limp against the bed.

“Gaara!” You warned, pushing him away. “Stop, stop! I — I can’t —!”

Immediately, he pulled his mouth and fingers away. You fell to your side, squeezing your legs. You panted, face hot, and in your haze wondered, in the future, if he would do this to you: edge you without realizing — or maybe on purpose? Finger and fuck your poor insides to make you a fumbling mess, as long as it was what you liked. If you told him, he would do it …

A second or so more and Gaara’s hand brushed against your elbow. “Was that all right?”

You turned over your shoulder to look at him, stars in your eyes. “Incredible.” You twisted to face him, kissing his lips, tasting and smelling yourself on him.

It wasn’t long before you were throbbing again, desperate for more contact. Your overactive imagination made it so. He embraced you in the kiss, his warm cock poking at you. You broke the kiss, panting as you brushed him aside to admire him.

You salivated at the sight of him. Your dream to have him twitching and dripping his seed down your mouth was not gone, but … but you couldn’t wait any longer. 

Besides, there would be more time for that.

“I need you inside of me,” You said.

He seemed to understand. You laid back down for him to topple you. Visions of the future — you topping him, bouncing atop his cock, swallowing his seed from under his table— filled your mind. Many fantasies that had already been revisited during your alone times. There would be so much time now. You just needed him.

You helped him position himself. Your excited cunt clenched around nothing in anticipation. You bit your lip as his cockhead brushed against your entrance.

“You will tell me,” Gaara began, both an assumption and an order, “if anything hurts.”

You nodded hastily, clinging to his arms. “Of course.”

“Good,” he said, “because I may not be able to stop.”

His cock slid into you, filling you in ways you couldn’t have imagined. You clung to him, nails digging into his forearms as he filled you to capacity. 

You nestled in the crook of his neck. “Gaara …”

Pain gave way to pleasure as Gaara succumbed to a thrust. Your head whirled with the novel sensations. The pain was alien but not immense. You stifled stammers out of fear they might encourage him to stop. 

Under no circumstances could he stop. 

Another thrust — 

“Mmfm!” You threw your head back. Gaara’s lips crashed into yours as he moved against you, slapping his hips into yours. 

You bit into his neck this time, nibbling at the hickeyed skin soon to bruise there. Gaara’s hand found your clit by accident — and upon seeing your pleased reaction, fixed his hand there and circled it.

He grunted with pleasure as your legs involuntarily wrapped around his waist. His pants puffed into your skin as he pounded you. “Ti — tight …!”

The pain at your core mingled with the pleasure in a way that was strangely pleasant. Your lips part to emit a confused moan-whimper. You wanted more, demanded more. So enamored with Gaara’s plundering of your cunt and his sounds increasing in volume, you didn’t feel him flinch away until his cock had left you.

Gaara pulled away, a hand glued to his cock with eyes squeezed shut. White spent spilled over your inner thigh with a frustrated cry from Gaara. You watched, mesmerized, as ropes of come spilled from his slit and onto your beaded skin.

“Gaara …” You murmured, cunt squeezing around nothing.

He opened his eyes to mere darkened slits, panting as he observed his work.

“I’m — I’m sorry …” He began to come to his senses, realizing what he’d done. “I didn’t know …”

“It’s okay.” You swept his spent from your thigh with scoops of your finger, disposing of it on the fabric. “They’re just sheets.”

Gaara glanced up at you. “Yes, but you …?”

“It’s okay.” You inched toward him. “I can’t get you back up, don’t worry …”

You caressed his cock, now turning flaccid. Gaara took a sharp intake of breath as your grip grew firm. You ran your tongue over your bottom lip before pressing a soft kiss to his head. You tested the waters, taking him into your mouth slowly  to see how he would react. Another kiss and swipe of your tongue —

“Nnrgh …” Gaara fisted the sheets. 

You resisted a smirk as you drew back, eyes flickering up at him. “Good?”

“Yes …” His breathing had grown labored, no doubt due to the gentle strokes you spoiled his overstimulated shaft with.

You leaned forward to run your tongue over the ridge of his head, outlining the span of it with your tongue. Gaara’s short, nearly inaudible gasps spurred you on to trap his head between your lips and suck.

“Ah, hah-ah —“

You took in more of him, feeling the veins trailing his cock grow more prominent with each new inch into your mouth. You grazed your fingertips over his balls as you dared another inch, hollowing your cheeks to serve his twitching cock.

“All right.” Gaara’s hand laid on your shoulder. “Enough — enough.”

You obeyed and released him with a pop. He was near fully erect now, his cock level with your face. You dug nails into your thigh. It had been so hard for you to resist tweaking your clit with him buried in your mouth.

“If you go on, I won’t last,” he explained. 

You nodded and followed the gesture of his gaze back into bed. He returned to his rightful place above you.

“One day soon, I’ll be on top,” You rambled, cheeks red and hot, as Gaara repositioned himself above you. “I can’t imagine how good you’d feel.”

“That day will be today. I only want to get this right now,” Gaara said, and with the tiniest bit of fanfare, placed his head at the tight ring of your cunt and slid inside.

“Aah — AHAA!”

“You seemed to like this before,” Gaara said, voice raised with teasing tilt as he rolled two finger pads into your neglected clit, accompanying his play with deep, slow thrusts.

“Mm …!” You arched into him, your leg spasmed in his hold as he tapped at your clit, Gaara’s fingers dangerously close to where his cock and your opening met. “Gaara!”

“That’s it,” he said. “That’s what I want to hear.” His thrusts quickened inchmeal, but a simple step felt like a mile. “I won’t be a novice for long, (Y/n). I’ll learn everything.”

He slapped a hard thrust into you and stayed there, your hips to his.

“I’ll make you feel everything,” he said as your head fell back into the disarrayed pillows.

You clenched him hard without meaning to. He had to stop talking, otherwise … The encouragement of your cunt was enough to make Gaara rock into you, lustful grunts sounding above you. You closed your and looped arms around his; his clit play would not stop; three fingers tweaked and circled your clit now, your pleasure mounting.

“She finds herself at the peak of climax, and he would be the one to deliver it to her …!”

With a loud moan, you clenched around him tighter and relished the startled moan he gave. His frown rested against your forehead. He seemed to be battling both with the pleasure he felt and the struggle to understand you, how this was possible. Your clit fixed between his two fingers, driving you mad as he filled you again and again with his cock.

Tightness gripped you again, and you knew were you were close. Gaara’s hand abandoned your calf to knead at your breast, eyes closed as he lost himself in you. 

“I — I’m …” he panted. “Again …!”

Gaara’s cock twitched inside of you. Close. How could he not be? You knew this wouldn’t last long, even with the help of your mouth. Your mind blared white, bright with the idea of Gaara coming so deep inside of you —

“Ahah …” Your vision gave you another pleasured throb you didn’t need. “Gaara …!”

Stupid, stupid. You couldn’t let him, you couldn’t — 

But you wanted it. Wanted him. You gripped on to him tighter. “Do it,” You ordered. “Do it, I want you — want —“

Yet as he slammed into you one final time and the warmth of his come filled you, you could do nothing but hold him closer and take it. His fingers tormented you, the stimulation sending you over the edge as well. 

Gaara pulled out, and you felt the slick of his seed seep from your hole onto the sheets. You moaned, clenching around his spent. 

So good …

“Amazing …” he remarked, eyes on your drooling cunt.

You tried to wade through the pleasure thrumming through you to understand your mistake, but couldn’t. The after-sex buzz proved too profound. You could hardly register it as a mistake at all, what with how good you felt, pleasurable aches simmering underneath your flushed skin. You dragged Gaara close for another kiss. 

Once released, Gaara said, “I’ve never experienced this level of closeness with anyone …” He wrapped arms around you. He lowered his gaze to your beaded clavicle while you played with the damp ends of his rustled hair. “It is strange, but wonderful, too.”

“Neither have I.” You grinned. He’s so grateful. You admired the light smile that came to Gaara’s face. “Was I good?”

Gaara glanced up. “Is it possible for someone not be to be good?”

You couldn’t discern your blush from the natural post-coitus flush you had. “It’s possible.” You wished you hadn’t said it; Gaara’s brows knit together, his eyes wandering with thoughts. Apparently, you’d given him a new worry. “But you were amazing,” You hastened to add.

His expressions softened. “Good. I’m glad.” He watched you pepper his hand and arms with kisses. “I want to be as good as the men in the books.”

“I think you’ve already achieved that, my love.”

Gaara nestled closer to you in the sheets. His hand flexed — open, close — as you left a kiss on his green veins. “Do we need to stop?” Gaara asked.

You met his eye, your mind drunk with him. 

“No,” You said and pulled him forward — for the two of you to be pulled under.

                                                                                                   

You had very little appetite at breakfast, your mind still enamored with the previous events that had come to pass.

Gaara was, of course, not at breakfast; tending to sensitive Kazekage duties was of the utmost importance. So instead, you choose to eat with Kankuro and Temari.

Gaara had quite the … stamina. You were sure you had looked like murder for the rest of the night; bed hair and wild eyes as you walked Gaara through all the things you had only read about and heard from other noble ladies. Aches you fought to keep discreet restricted a lot of your movements. 

The sounds of Gaara’s soft pants and whispers of praise were still in your ear long after they had faded into time. Warmth spread through your cheeks as you stared idly at the water remaining in your glass, looking but not seeing. 

“So close, (Y/n) —“

“You feel amazing —“

“Don’t make me stop —“

“(Y/n)? (Y/n)!”

Temari tore you from your reverie, the images of last night turning to watercolor in your mind.

“Watch the salt,” she said, pointing to your plate.

You looked down to see your hand pouring a hill of salt on your fish. You sighed, put it away and shoveled the hill from your plate.

“I’m going to give a speech at the wedding,” Kankuro said, mind made up. 

“I think that’s a great idea.” Temari sipped her tea. “Just as long as you tell me what you’re going to say.”

“What?” Kankuro crossed his arms indignantly. “You don’t trust me?” 

“Oh, I wonder why, Mr. psychoactive cactus man?”

Kankuro sighed in defeat as you giggled. “All right, fine,” he replied. 

“Do you have anything written?” You asked, desperate for something to cling to so you might live in the present.

Kankuro shrugged. “Not yet. I’m not as good with words as Gaara.”

“Nonsense!” You playfully slapped him on the shoulder. “I’m sure whatever you say will be lovely. You’ve got to let me read.”

Kankuro held up his pinkie. “Promise.”

“I hope Lord Boutoku’s quarters are to his satisfaction,” Temari said as you wrapped your pinkie around Kankuro’s. “We wanted only the best to make him comfortable.”

So it was her. You smiled. “He’s doing well. Thank you, Temari.”

“No problem!”

Better than well, actually; your father had returned to a softer version of himself, ordering servants to and fro and requesting to be served all of his meals in bed. You resisted an eye-roll, thinking about the prima donna that he was. As long as he was happy, you supposed.

“All right, I’m outta here.” Temari set aside a napkin and rose from her seat. “Long day today.”

“With what, exactly?”

“Lady Ikanago has requested details about Lord Boutoku’s arrival, and I said I’d go fill her in,” Temari explained. 

“Gonna grab her some painkillers for that hip, too?”

Temari threw a bun at Kankuro’s head, which he aptly caught and bit into. 

“Or maybe some purple pandemonium.” Temari snickered as Kankuro blanched. She left her chair. “So long, you two.”

You waved goodbye to her and returned to your breakfast, humming quietly before taking a sip of your water — 

“So,” Kankuro began. “You and my little brother sure had fun last night, didn’t you —?”

— You spit out your water. 

“Wha — what?” You dabbed yourself frantically with a napkin.

Kankuro’s laughter shook his shoulders, the bun becoming clearly too heavy to hold under the weight of the mirth.

“How do you —“ Your mind went to wild places. “He didn’t tell you —?”

“Are you kidding?” Kankuro said. “Of course not. He’d never; he’s ever bit the gentleman he seems.”

“Then …” You looked around helplessly. “Then how …?”

Kankuro tapped a finger on his temple. “A brother knows these things; I got a good look at him earlier this morning.” He took another bite out of his now crescent moon of a bun and added with a mouth full, “plus, the two of you are such virgins — all dazed and bashful. If this is you trying to hide it, then the whole village will know.”

“Oh, gods.” You hid in your soup. You had passed out long before Gaara and had woken up in his bed without him in it, accompanied only by a simple note telling you Kazekage duties had pulled him away and to go back to sleep full of good dreams.

Kankuro chuckled. “Don’t sweat it. Nobody heard anything.”

“That’s not helping me to not sweat.”

“It’s okay!” Kankuro couldn’t stop grinning. “Really! I’m glad of it.” He shook his head, his smile not having died. “I was worried it’d never happen for him, my poor little brother.”

You groaned, elbow supporting your weight as you ran a hand over your face. “Does Temari know?”

“You’re still alive,” Kankuro said, “so no.”

That earned a little dry laugh from you, a spark of mirth, and it was gone. You looked up through a crack in your fingers. “He looked happy this morning when you saw him, right?”

Kankuro’s expression sobered a bit as he looked into your worried face. “Of course.”

You sighed, relieved.

Kankuro scooped another egg onto his plate. “You gonna go see if he’s still happy?”

“He’s busy.” Both your arms folded on the table. You looked out the window at the faraway blue sky. “I don’t want to bother him.”

In truth, you had no idea what you were supposed to do after sex. Icha Icha was coming up dry on that front; the couples usually lazed in bed or fell asleep together and the time skips gave you no idea what was meant to happen the day after. 

“You’re too timid, sis.” Kankuro reached over and pinched your cheek as you grumbled. “Don’t worry about that; we bug him all day with little things. He always says he doesn’t mind. Breaks up the monotony of the day.”

You smiled to yourself. “I don’t know …”

“Both of you think too much,” Kankuro said. “Do you even think last night would have happened if my brother was so sensitive to everything you did? Stop worrying.”

You chuckled. “Okay, okay. I’ll go myself.”

“That a girl.”

You straightened your back as you neared Gaara’s office. Despite your nerves, you did want to see him again. 

“Do I look all right, Chuuyou?” You asked.

He blinked, as though surprised you would expect a reasonable answer about fashion from a shinobi. “The skirt complements your legs very well, my lady.”

You nodded, assured. You had opted for your precious fishnets again, with wedged sandals and a skirt to soften their effect. Would everything be different post-coitus? For better or worse? You let yourself into his office.

“Gaara?” You sweetened your voice as the door creaked open.

Two other Sand ninjas flanked Gaara’s desk. Their heads raised when you entered. You met Gaara’s eye immediately, who stiffened upon seeing you.

“Hello, gentlemen,” You said. “I would like a minute alone with my fiancée.”

The ninja exchanged glances. You watched in mild amusement as they obeyed without a word from Gaara and exited.

“They are instructed to listen to you now as well,” Gaara said as the door closed, reading the question on your face. “I thought it appropriate, as you will be a part of my family from now on.”

Butterflies fluttered in your chest as you strode to his desk. You will be a part of my family. You admired your cactus gift now present atop it, now the parent of two tiny succulents flanking either sides of it.

 “I apologize for leaving so abruptly,” Gaara said. “My responsibilities as Kazekage …”

“No!” You dismissed him with a nervous laugh. “Don’t apologize, it was nothing.”

“I never would have left you for anything less imperative,” Gaara said while shuffling papers. 

Gaara’s fingers grazed yours as they ghosted the wood of the desk. And, upon instinct, you crossed the desk to him. He stared ahead. Rose-colored the pale in his face as he set aside a folder.

“Last night was … all right?”

“That’s a bit of an understatement.” You looped a finger around one of his. “Funny. I was going to ask you the same.” 

“Nonsense.” Gaara’s grip grew firmer on your hand. “You were — are — everything a man could ask for.” 

You lowered your gaze sheepishly, not knowing what to say to that. 

Gaara gave an affirmative nod. “Good. At any rate, there is still much I wish for you to teach me.” He opened a drawer. You gawked at his collection of Icha Icha novels. 

“You keep these in here?”

“They don’t interfere with work, I assure you.”

“I could’ve sworn I taught you enough last night!” 

“Perhaps for one night,” Gaara said, “but not indefinitely.”

You giggled as he rose to admire you. A gentle smile narrowed his eyes. Gaara’s thumb brushed the side of your face. He left a kiss on your forehead. 

Gaara …

“I intend to spend more time with you once my work is done,” Gaara said as he parted from you.  

“I understand,” You said and, feigning tiredness, you added, “and in the meantime, I guess I’ll look to see what my father is up to.”

Gaara nodded wordlessly. You pet his hand, not quite through with the feel of his touch, before waving goodbye to him before leaving the office. 

You might as well have been walking on pure air; there was nothing tethering you to the earth. Nothing at all.

The end of the month began to draw near. You, your father, and Gaara were in talks about how the two villages would intersect from now on. Father was willing to split his Cyclone down the middle and gift you some of the members, but you weren’t too sure. There were certain classified documents he promised you could now read and, if you deemed it wise, share with Gaara. Those you were more interested in; if you could assist in the coming together of your two villages in any way, that was how you wanted to occupy your time. The diplomacy enthralled you.

But it wasn’t because you didn’t appreciate the effort; Father hadn’t been this warm toward you since the days before your mother had died. It made you feel precious to see him grow incensed about the attack at the beach. You had to suppress laughter when he promised he would send his best to hang your attacker at a town square, slice him into pieces (whatever suited his mood that day) until you steered him on to a different subject. You often had your breakfasts with him now, where he either asked you about your days with Gaara’s family or reminisced about the good old days of being a shinobi (whenever those were, but you knew better than to interject). 

And, of course, there was the ever-elusive oasis. 

You asked Father if he had told Gaara anything about your village’s greatest secret, but his answers were always vague. Supposedly, he was saving the juiciest information for last.

“He’s told me nothing,” Gaara said during one breakfast Father hadn’t roped you into, “and I think it’s because I haven’t asked. I don’t wish to seem too eager.”

“Well, they can have it,” Temari had said, twirling her fork. “I’m not really that curious about some puddle of water in the middle of the desert — no offense,” she added to you with an apologetic flash of a smile. “I just care about how much of a precedent this will set for other villages we’ve rivaled with.”

“Temari’s right,” Baki said before turning to Gaara. “Excellent deduction skills, Lord Kazekage; we wouldn’t want to make Lord Boutoku uncomfortable with our inquiries. The council is doing more than enough of that on their own.”

Kankuro, you noticed, had been strangely silent on the matter.

You and Gaara were sharing a room now, which you were sure was some kind of symbolic metaphor. You had few possessions to move in besides things that were left in your closet; the clothes you had brought with you to Sunagakure, the clothes you’d bought with Temari, simple knick knacks. Gaara was more than liberal with his personal space and seemed to welcome the intrusion.

You woke one morning — ready to retch. You tore the sheets off of you and sprinted to the bathroom. You ducked your head in the toilet and vomited until you dry-heaved. 

You collapsed to the side with a groan. You wiped your mouth and flushed it away. 

“Are you all right, my lady?” one of the servants asked, her voice muffled through the closed door. 

“I’m — I’m fine!” You rubbed your chest, stiff and aching from the retching. 

What was this all about? You hadn’t eaten anything out of the ordinary? In fact, you’d barely eaten anything at all the past few days. Nothing beyond what was necessary to sustain you. Your mind had been on things far more urgent than food. How could you —

A sharp, cold chill ran over you.

No … it can’t be. 

 … It could. 

Leaving out your first night with Gaara, the others had been … extensive. And sorely lacking in protection. 

Oh. Oh —

“Damn you, Jiraiya-sensei!” You hissed as you scampered to your feet. 

This wasn’t supposed to happen! His characters never used protection! What a fantasy!

But you should’ve known better, after all the stories noble women had shared with you about their accidental pregnancies. Some had even fallen pregnant on their cycle. All of these cautionary tales had impelled the younger ones to be more careful. You had not been careful. 

You were pregnant.

Your head spun as you faced yourself in the mirror, ready to … you didn’t know. Laugh maniacally? Cry? Be … happy? 

Happy?

You brushed a hand over your belly. Could it be possible you were growing life there at that very moment? Your child? Gaara’s child? You would be a mother? All of these casualties formed chaotic webs inside your mind, one string falling after the last. Your overactive brain flashed images of you and Gaara and children that looked like both of you. A family. A proper family …

Worry was replaced with rising elation, like a morning sun coming to bring clarity. What if you were pregnant? Wouldn’t it be a good thing? And the wedding … no one would ever know you had gotten pregnant before; in no way would you start showing before the time came. 

Who would you tell? Who could you tell? Temari? Would she be upset with you? 

You wished, more than anything, to have your mother. 

She would know what to do. You felt a strange kinship with her suddenly; was this what it was like for her when she had discovered her pregnancy? Your mind went a mile a minute. You knew who you could tell.

Finally, you stepped out of the bathroom to see serving ladies and Chuuyou looking concerned.

“I’m fine, really!” You assured. Your mind was made up. “Chuuyou.”

“Yes, my lady?” his soothing voice hit your ear.

“I need to see my father.”

“Ahh, and if it isn’t my favorite daughter.”

Chuuyou stepped aside so you could enter your father’s room. The windows were drawn to let in the morning sun. Tendrils of steam curled into the air from his teacup. All of this was contradicted by him fanning himself on one of the couches. 

“Hello, Father,” You greeted.

“Come, come.” He centered the tray on the table.”And to what do I owe this early meeting? I wasn’t expecting to see you for a few hours more.”

“Well, uh.” You watched your father’s hands dance around the tea. He poured you a cup and offered it to you. You accepted it with a tight smile. “I have something to tell you.”

Father sipped his tea. “I’m all ears.”

“Well …” You lowered your gaze to your mug, the steam heating your chin. “I woke up feeling sick this morning —“

“Oh, don’t tell me.” Father snapped his fan closed with a chuckle. “You inherited your weak stomach from your mother. Shame, shame. The woman was my entire world, but the poor thing could be so —“

“I think I may be pregnant.”

… 

…

Breeze whipped the curtain hems with a howl. Chuuyou seemed to take in a sharp breath in the corner, unseen by you; You only had eyes for Father. He’d become a statue, facing you without seeing.

“Pregnant?” Father’s voice was hushed, low. “You’re sure?”

“We — well, I’m not entirely sure.” You twiddled your fingers. “I haven’t done any tests, but it’s a possibility …” You cleared your throat, lowering your gaze. “Highly possible. I was sick this morning, and I’ve never felt anything like that before. We can visit the infirmary together to be sure —“

“You stupid girl.”

You glanced up — hot tea seared your face.

You screamed, hands flying to your face as you doubled over to the sound of china shattering. 

“Chuuyou!” Father roared, “close the curtains!”

You collapsed on the floor, still holding your face. Every part of your face burned, hot and horrible. You wailed. Curtains rustled. A hand seized the hem of your shirt to hoist you to your feet. 

“Get up — GET UP — look at me!” Father snarled, shaking you. 

You obeyed with a frightened whimper. Your blurred vision of Father struggled to focus in the darkness. “Father — father, please —!” 

“What did I ever do for the gods to curse me with you?” he yanked you closer. “I’ve been as patient as possible, but this? I am so sick of your whorish ways!”

“Father, fath —!”

“Chuuyou told me everything about your filthy little tryst with the Kazekage in his greenhouse,” Father hissed, hot breath close to your face. “Why do you think I’m here —!?”

He tossed you. You were a fool to think the couch would meet you; your back collided with the hard ground. You stumbled, fumbling away on the wet floor on wobbling hands and feet as Father advanced.

“Did you think I would be overjoyed to see you married off to our greatest enemy? Stupid girl!” He picked up another tea cup and threw it at your head. You dodged with a shriek and it split apart at the wall.

You gasped, clutching at the wall. Something came to light in your head, wedged by the horror. The greenhouse … You glanced at Chuuyou. At the same moment, he met your eye. 

You had been alone with Gaara in the greenhouse. But you were never alone, not really. And Baki had been assured by his own informants the two of you hadn’t been seen. But you had been seen. But not by Matsuri. By someone who was always watching, for you had your guardian, your supposed protector.

Your shadow.

“It was you …” You whispered. “You spread the word about the greenhouse …”

Chuuyou lowered his gaze. “Yes …”

“You told him!” You pointed to Father, a set of dominoes toppling in your mind. “You set up Matsuri!” 

He closed his eyes.

“Yes,” he muttered. “Once I realized you were truly falling in love with the Kazekage, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I left your side at times I knew you wouldn’t notice or care, and assured there were two Matsuris when there should have been one. I had a clone of her visit a gossip columnist in the village. I knew it would cause a scandal.” He bowed his head. “And it did.”

You shook your head, the level of scheming overwhelming to wrap your head around. “How could you?”

And one of Gaara’s closest? His precious student, of all people? But, with a sickening feeling in your stomach unrelated to the fetus growing there, you began to understand: It would appear as though Gaara was a leader, a Kage, who did not have his house in order, who could not control those closest to him. An unstable house was one easy to topple. How he must have felt in the desert, when morning had come and Gaara was still alive. 

“The Sand must be defeated, My Lady —“

“Do not call me that!” You shrieked. “You have no right to call me that!” 

“This village is duplicitous, it is evil!” Chuuyou went on. “All the years of humiliation, of oppression ― it cannot be undone by something so cynical as a political marriage! They must pay for the pain they have caused us.”

“You helped to sully Gaara’s reputation to spread doubt in the council.” You felt you might retch again. “To strengthen the factions already against him.”

“His reputation has already been sullied. He is a monster — he was born on —“

“And my reputation, Chuuyou?” You murmured, your heart breaking even more than you thought it could, thought it capable. “What about mine?”

Chuuyou opened his eyes only to cast his gaze to the floor, shame keeping him from lifting his chin.

“You were supposed to protect me …” Rage and sorrow toiled inside you. And he failed both times.

You felt dirty and depraved, deprived. Chuuyou, the one person you felt you could always trust even if his shadowing had been bothersome at times. But then … What kind of fool were you? Chuuyou had been chosen by your father, after all. Anyone imposed by him should have raised your alarm, should have cast doubt within you. 

“The opinion of those living in the Sand will cease to matter once I have instilled myself as their ruler,” Father said. You had not forgotten he was there. You could never forget. “I was really hoping you would surprise me,” Father’s voice was low as he glowered over you. “Everything I have taught you … I was hoping you had some sound reason for delaying your task. But instead you come to me, suspicious of carrying his child. You are so pathetically predictable.”

“So it was all lies,” You said. “All of it, from the moment you came.”

“My time here has been miserable,” Father hissed. “Having to watch you play house with that thing” — he threw his hand — “and his family. I am here for one reason and one only, and that is to take matters into my own hands.”

Your eyes widened at him. It was all beginning to make sense now. The letter — it had come after the greenhouse. Your father and his Cyclone. You had thought him simply paranoid, wanting his own protection.

That was not why.

You thought of the other Oasis ninja littered all over the palace — the entire village. Perfectly poised to act. All they needed was to be given word … 

“So you’ve just been —“ You struggled to get words out. “Biding your time?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Father said. “It seems, despite my intentions, I have friends in this village.” His smile was cold. “Members of the council would like to see the Kazekage’s removal.”

A cold chill. Joseki. And only the gods knew who else. No. No …!

You weren’t quick enough — Father grabbed you again. 

“I would hate to kill kin,” he said. “I am giving you not a mission, but a choice. Either you kill your beloved, or you can join your mother and brother in the afterlife.”

You stared at him. Tears ran down your face. “You wouldn’t,” You whispered hopelessly. “You wouldn’t.”

The madness had returned to your father’s eyes. Dread sank you; the madness had never left him. 

“It would be a shame if I had to kill my unborn grandchild as well, a blight on our family that it is.”

He dropped you and you fell sloppily to the floor. You cradled your head as it throbbed. You cracked your eyes open, sobbing in the corner as Father left the room, and Chuuyou, his sorrowful gaze lingering on you, followed him.

You hated no one more than yourself.

You had no idea how long you laid on the floor, shattered dreams and china surrounding you. Darkness and quiet swallowed up the room. Spilled tea long cold wet the bottom of your sandals. Time blurred miserably, thick and colorless, and you inferred that it must’ve been hours. You had managed to pick yourself off the floor and skulk to the room that had once been yours. Chuuyou’s loss weighed your step where he would’ve trailed them. Locking the door behind you, you waited to collapse on the bed to collapse in every other way.

You screamed into a pillow, your tears wetting the fabric. You clenched fists into its plush, and you were sure you could rip it apart, powered by nothing but anguish.

Emotions had blinded you. You were so desperate to believe your father had changed his mind you had missed the truth: he only wanted to succeed where you had failed. 

He was playing along. All this time … All the while working out sinister background details with Joseki and — horror rained down on you — others to take down Gaara. Had all those times at his bedside been a lie? You couldn’t quite believe it; Father’s joy had seemed so genuine, his laughter — when was the last time you’d heard him laugh? He’d been a different person, an echo of something long lost. The memories of all those mornings evoked a different ache in you, impelling you to touch a hand on your chest. I lost the father I never had. That’s why I feel the way I do.

Chuuyou (your shadow, what a joke) had, at some point, slipped away to frame Matsuri. What was her role in this? Beside your angst lay curiosity; a part of you wanted to go to her cell and ask her yourself.

But you couldn’t. There was no time. Angst. Curiosity. Alarm. You were possibly carrying Gaara’s child — and wouldn’t be for much longer, if you didn’t do something fast. You wiped your tears with the back of your arm, releasing a shuddering breath as you rose from bed.

There was only one card you had to play: you had to tell Gaara. Now.

You picked yourself up from your self-hate, composed yourself, and left the room for the one you shared with Gaara. He had to be there by now; it was late afternoon. The last time you had turned your head to the sky, it had been periwinkle. Your head had swelled with dreams. You hadn’t wanted to die.

You lugged yourself around, giving idle hellos to maids and servants who greeted you, working past hallways now familiar to you until you made it to the bedroom door and entered.

“Gaara …!” You were relieved. 

Gaara sat at the bed’s edge, one leg swung over the other. Unharmed. He raised his head to smile at you. “(Y/n). Hello. I was just waiting for you.”

You brought him into a hug. “Thank the gods …” You whispered into his sleeve.

You felt his hand still at the small of your back. “(Y/n) … There have been some issues.”

You pulled back to stare inquisitively up at him. Carefully, you asked, “What do you mean? … What types of issues?”

Gaara cast his gaze low. “Would you be opposed to remaining only in the palace?”

“Gaara.” Your brows furrowed. “What’s going on?”

Gaara still averted your gaze. “I hate asking this of you — you’ve been so sequestered already — but … There are anti-Kazekage sentiments brewing across the village.”

“Anti-Kazekage …” You trailed. Did this have to do with the greenhouse? Or your father? Or both? “Gaara, oh no … I’m sorry …”

“Don’t be,” Gaara said. “It’s as I told you: not all have come to accept me. And as there has been a significant uptick in drama lately, it was to be expected. I highly doubt it will leak to the entire village. I’ll deal with it.” He glanced up at you at last. “But I fear for your safety, especially after what took place at the beach …” He stopped, invisible brows furrowed as he appraised you. “Is something the matter?”

“Yes.” There was no point sugarcoating. This was it. You couldn’t be a coward anymore. Do the right thing for once. For your husband. For the baby. “My —“ 

But your tongue refused to work; it lay limp in your mouth. Your lips parted, but only breath escaped. Sound, no words. 

Gaara took your hand. “Take your time. That is what Temari would always tell me when I had trouble speaking as a child.” He paused. “As a young child.”

“I’m all right,” You said, creating some distance between the two of you. “I’m — okay, really! It’s just, my —“ Again, your tongue froze. Your lips closed against your will, refusing to help you impart speech. You tried to force words out — only to remain hopelessly tongue tied. You closed your eyes with a sinking realization.

Your heart ramped. Panic set in. Oh, no. Oh no oh no.

Father’s done something to me. I can’t say it! I can hardly  think !

“Are you okay?” 

“Gaara …” Fear shallowed your breath. It gripped you like a child hiding from the dark, and you wished you had a teddy to hug. I’m so scared. What should I do?

“(Y/n).” Gaara’s voice was firm now.

You closed your eyes, bringing Gaara close. “No.” You shook your head. “I — I just …” You fought tears. You couldn’t tell the truth, and now you truly couldn’t. I can’t tell him — I literally can’t tell him. “I just can’t stay inside anymore! I feel so claustrophobic, but — but I always seem to be causing trouble for you … That shouldn’t be the case for someone you love.”

“No.” Gaara caressed your cheek. “If anything, I cause trouble for you.” And with all the authority of a Kage, he said, “I will address this. I’m sorry, truly, but it will only be for a few more days. No longer.”

Like you cared about living or being anywhere besides the Sand palace. Like you wouldn’t want to burrow into it and stay forever. Wordlessly, you brought him into a hug. You wanted to burrow inside him, hide in your fiancée, the only place you felt safe. Even if he couldn’t save you.

“If anything, I cause trouble for you,” Gaara said. He stroked the nape of your neck, his voice as gentle as autumn rain. “Forgive me.”

You pinched at his sleeve, a cue for him to comfort you more, and, miraculously, Gaara obliged, running a hand over your arm.

“You … could never cause trouble for me.”

“Do you think (Y/n) has been acting strangely lately?” Gaara asked. 

His siblings lounged around the sitting room, accompanied by Baki. Despite the demands of their respective duties, some days were slower than others. Gaara lived for these days where he could enjoy the company of his family and friends, and he enjoyed it now, even with his concern for you.

At his inquiry, Temari stopped fanning herself. “Hm?”  “I haven’t noticed anything. Though … I haven’t seen much of Lord Boutoku lately. Oh.” She sighed and rested her chin on her palm. “I hope the council’s not crowding him too much. Did you hear Ryusa kept him out all day yesterday?”

“Serves him right,” Kankuro grumbled. “Geezers. All of them. He’s got some nerve, always retiring to his room because he’s tired — like he doesn’t have servants waiting on him hand and foot.”

“I’ve heard about people having …” Gaara fought the anxiety inside of him as he reached for the term, “cold feet …”

“Certainly not, Lord Kazekage,” Baki said. “You must understand: women are mysterious creatures. They need a great deal of time to themselves.”

“I second that,” Temari said. “It’s a surprise you’re not married, Baki.”

Baki gave her a flat look. “Oh, is it?”

“Gaara,” she said, ignoring Baki, “I’m sure she’s fine. Don’t worry.”

“Yeah, I’ll go check on her for you,” Kankuro said. 

Gaara frowned. “But …”

Kankuro placed a hand on Gaara’s shoulder on his way out. “Big brother will take care of it. Don’t worry.”

Gaara appreciated the levity, and after a second or two nodded.

“Thank you, Kankuro.”

Kankuro made it to Gaara’s quarters. He could hear the trickle of shower water. The bed was perfectly made, along with the rest of the room. Not a hair out of place — beside your necklace on the bedside table.

Kankuro sighed. Worried about nothing, as always, Gaara. The necklace’s disk caught in the lamplight. Curiosity tugged at him. He approached the necklace. He remembered the pomp-and-circumstance that came along with Lord Boutoku bestowing it on you. The whole thing was cheesy, but … sweet. He knew how much you loved the thing, were never seen without it. Maybe the old man wasn’t so bad. Crazy, but not bad. 

Kankuro grazed the necklace’s face — he misjudged it, though, and it clanked to the floor.

“Woops.” He knelt down to retrieve it, only to see its disk had cracked open. 

His eyes widened. “Oh no,” he hissed. “No!”

Kankuro, what the fuck did you —?

Glistening black caught his eye. The necklace had broken apart at its center like a metaphorical heart, allowing something to … seep from it.

Something was inside the necklace.

He leaned forward to further inspect it.

Your hands ran absentmindedly over your body. The hot water did nothing to change the corpse-cold temperature of your skin. With numb fingers, you shut the water off, your hair dripping over the valve.

You felt othered from your own body, trapped in it with no choices, no resolution. The clock ticked imminently to doomsday in your mind. When would Father attack? Would he make you watch it as punishment? 

I hope he kills me first. I do not want to see what he does next.

You palmed your stomach and imagined the fetus occupying your womb. The only thing anchoring you from life, and you had even failed this life before it was even born.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Only a few days ago, you were reeling at the prospect of marrying Gaara, only sooner you were imagining starting a family. What a risible delusion. What a farce.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

You left the shower and wrapped a towel around yourself. A new set of dry clothes lay folded for you, and after drying off, you dressed. Fresh clothes. Soft. Flowery-scented shampoo, soap. The warmth of the clothes failed to penetrate your skin, much like the shower water had. You felt carved, rounded out and empty, like a shell whose creature had long since slithered away.

You reached for your necklace — it was gone. 

What? Your reverie cleared enough for you to ponder. Had you misplaced it? Remembering one moment from another had become a struggle. What had you done with it?

Unless it was taken?

Your eyes widened. Panic shattered the reverie completely. What if Father had taken it, or had someone do it? 

You exited the room, head swinging either way. Where would you look? The only place that came to mind was the sitting room. You headed there, descended the stairs to the last floor —

“Has anyone seen my —?”

Gaara was there, waiting for you. And Temari and Kankuro. And Baki. And a dozen other sand ninja.

You froze on the stairs.

Kankuro, blank-faced, lifted his hand: your necklace chain roped around his fingers and hung there. “Looking for something?” He turned half of the necklace’s broken face and the poison dripped blood-black dots onto the floor.

Your body, flushed from running, ran corpse-cold again. “I …”

“(Y/n) …” Gaara said. “What is this?”

Your throat was too constricted to help form words. A thousand knives seemed to hold you in place.

“An incredibly powerful agent, I’d say,” Kankuro finished for him in a detached, clinical voice, though nothing could conceal the cold fury underneath. “Extracted from the Red Spine plant. Grows from her side of the desert. I’ve even read about it … You would’ve been dead in seconds, Gaara.”

You shook your head wildly. “No, Gaara, Kankuro — I can explain …!”

“So that’s why Boutoku’s here,” Temari said under her breath. You could see the whites of her knuckles from where you stood. Shadows shrouded her eyes before she fixed you with a murderous glare. “You planned to poison him.”

There was no air in your lungs. “No … no …. Wait, I — please —“

“This whole time …” Kankuro’s anger simmered under his breath, barely held back. “It’s all been a ruse. You were waiting for us to let our guards down —“

“No!”

“I knew something was off!” Temari roared, a hysterical edge to her voice now. “I knew something was wrong! This whole time — and when you woke up in the infirmary and flipped out about the necklace being gone! You thought we’d found out!”

Tears were streaming down your face now. You tried to move your mouth helplessly to reveal the truth, but no words were forthcoming. As Father designed, your tongue rolled and failed you.

It doesn’t matter. I knew. I agreed to all of this. All of it.

“There must be some explanation.” Gaara’s voice was measured, but even you could detect the hint of desperation in his tone. “A misunderstanding …?”

You kept moving your mouth, but you were sure you only appeared stammering and pathetic, grasping at straws to craft into lies. Your legs failed; you slumped to a step. You caught Baki’s eye, quietly pleading, but disappointment seemed to keep him silent.

“There isn’t, Gaara.” Kankuro took a step. You’d never seen him look so imposing; his face paint rendered him monstrous. “She’s been wearing that fucking thing since she got here, since I brought her to you —!”

Kankuro threw the necklace, emptied of its contents, into your face. You yelped, catching it with trembling hands. Temari’s 

hands shook, aching, probably, for a weapon to strike you with.

“You snake!” Kankuro hissed. “After everything —!”

“Gaara …” You looked up — and your heart fell to pieces.

Gaara was a stone, but his eyes were lined with moisture. You had brought him to near tears.

You had done this.

“What do you have to say for yourself?” Baki asked. “If you’ve anything at all to say.”

“Please, Gaara  …” You were crawling away from the stairs now, toward them. “Please, please …”

Save me.

Gaara turned away from you. His expression was cold. 

“Take her.”

“No!” You screamed as ninja advanced to grab you. You kicked as you were hoisted to your feet. “No, you can’t, Gaara!” You were being thrust through the threshold when your voice ripped from your throat: “I’M PREGNANT!”

The shinobi paused, turned to Gaara for guidance. 

Gaara searched your eyes, his expression reserved in his desperation for this to be true. 

“Please,” You sobbed. “It’s true … You can’t do this. You know it’s possible.” 

He turned around, this time his back to you. “She’ll be given a test to confirm whether this is true. We can no longer take her on her word. We’re done here … Take her.”

You sobbed miserably as you were dragged away. Temari and Kankuro’s words filtered through your awareness, but nothing registered.

“Matsuri needs to be released, we need to go get her —“

“We have to deal with Boutoku now!” 

“I can’t believe this —“

But it all fell away as you lolled your head to the side. Brutal daylight hit your face as you were dragged from the palace’s entrance, and through blurry eyes, you watched the place that had become your home grow farther away. Nothing but a dream.

[herrscherofinsanity]

Anything for you

Summary: Nayeon would do anything for her girlfriend, even getting over some of her biggest pet peeves.

Fluff

Im Nayeon x fem!reader

Word count: 1.4k

A/N: This is me being kinda back. In honor of Twice's 8th anniversary I wanted to write something for my ultimate bias; I'll be back simping for the aespa girls soon, I have lots of ideas... I just need to find time to write them. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this, and also thank you for reading!

____________________

“Hey can you pause the movie for a second? I really need to go to the bathroom”, Momo whined as she got up from the couch making the other girls groan.

“You always do this!”

“It was just getting to the good part!”

“Can we kick her out?”

“Is one night of peace and quiet too much to ask?”

You chuckled, watching the chaos unfold; a warm feeling spreading through your chest when you felt your girlfriend’s arms wrapping around your waist in a tight hold. You turned your head towards her, planting a soft kiss on her cheek.

“You find this amusing?” Nayeon whispered, not wanting to draw unwanted attention towards the two of you.

“I do” you whispered back, a playful grin on your lips, “you girls have quite the bond, I’m jealous”.

“There’s no need to be jealous, babe” she said, kissing your cheek “you’re my favorite anyway”.

Before you could reply, another voice cut you off. “What do you mean she’s your favorite?!” Chaeyoung complained, wanting more drama to unfold.

“Jihyo, the couple is being annoying… again”, Tzuyu said.

“Oh, leave them alone” Sana said, your girlfriend sent her a grateful smile, but Sana’s sentence wasn’t over yet. “Nayeon can’t help the fact that she’s whipped”.

The members laughed, teasing the two of you relentlessly. Your girlfriend shot you a defeated look, so much for spending a relaxing time together without any interruptions.

“What are we talking about?”, Momo asked as she made her way back from the bathroom.

“Nayeon being stupidly in love with y/n” Jeongyeon replied nonchalantly; your girlfriend silently sulked behind you.

“If you don’t mind, can I ask you two something?”, Mina looked towards you, a curious expression on her face.

You sent her a gentle smile, encouraging her to ask her question.

“When did you realize you were in love with each other?”.

An innocent question, but you felt as if you were about to go into cardiac arrest with the way your heart dropped. Nayeon wasn’t that far behind you, she felt as if the living room started spinning. On the other hand, both of your reactions left the girls feeling clueless. Why were you being so awkward? Surely you two had already… wait.

“W-well, we haven’t-” Nayeon began.

“Actually, I know the answer to that question!” Jihyo exclaimed, a dangerous gleam in her eyes.

“What could you possibly be talking about?” Nayeon hissed, shooting her fellow member a suspicious look; the whole interaction caught your attention.

“I would also like to know” you cleared your throat “…please”.

Nayeon looked at you with what you could only describe as pure panic, “baby, I really don’t think-”.

“Jihyo! What are you stalling for?” Jeongyeon exclaimed.

“Yeah! Go ahead and tell us!”

“Okay!” Jihyo exclaimed, clapping her hands to get everyone’s attention. “Gather ‘round kids! This is the story of how I realized Nayeon was without a doubt, head over heels in love with y/n!”.

____________________

Two months ago.

"You can't be serious".

"I swear! They kept calling us 'wig group', Sana was about ready to lose it" your girlfriend, Nayeon said, her tone full of amusement.

You laughed at her story, not fully believing it, but still amused by how creative her fans could be.

Im Nayeon, better known as Twice’s Nayeon, but to you she simply was Nayeon; the same girl who nervously asked you to be her girlfriend 3 months ago.

You two were introduced by your mutual friend, Yeri who had spent weeks going on and on about how she knew the perfect person for you to go out with.  You were incredibly hesitant, but you eventually caved and agreed to give Yeri’s friend a chance.

Nayeon surprised you in the best of ways; after your first date, you couldn’t help but agree with Yeri, she really was the perfect person for you. The loud girl carved a permanent place in your heart for herself and nothing could come between the two of you; not the hate comments, not your companies, and definitely not the malicious rumors surrounding your relationship. Being with Nayeon was definitely worth it.

“We should get going, babe”, she said with a sad smile “you have a photoshoot and I’ve got an interview; we can’t stay any longer”.

As if to mock her, right in that second it began to pour. Nayeon looked at you in shock, and you couldn’t help but laugh at the troubled expression she wore. You knew perfectly well you would have to find a way to leave the small café you were currently hanging out at, your schedules depended on it, but still, a few extra minutes with your girlfriend couldn’t hurt.

“We’re going to have to make a run for it”, you sighed, the responsible part of your brain outweighing the not-so-smart one.

Nayeon looked at you with a frown on her face, her gaze kept moving between your frame and the raging storm outside. “You’re not wearing a jacket, y/n”.

You hummed, “it doesn’t look like this rain is stopping any time soon, we can’t afford to wait”.

“You’re going to catch a cold”.

“Maybe, but you know the deal, our relationship must not interfere with our careers” you rolled your eyes as you recited the same speech that had followed you around for the past month.

“Stay here”, she said sternly, “I’ll be right back”. You frowned, but followed her instructions. Not even five minutes later, Nayeon was back with a black umbrella in her hand.

“Where’d you get that from?” you asked her, she definitely didn’t have an umbrella when you got here.

“I just bought it” she grumbled, “I’m not going to let you get sick. Now come on, we really should get going”.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Jihyo was currently waiting for the rest of her members to finish getting ready, they had an interview lined up and who knows what else might get magically booked along the way.

In an attempt to entertain herself, the leader unlocked her phone and tapped on the Twitter app. She mindlessly scrolled through her timeline, nothing truly catching her attention; that was until she came across two familiar figures.

Several pictures of her fellow member and her girlfriend greeted her. Now, Jihyo wasn’t surprised by the pictures in general; Nayeon, despite the countless warnings, was always going out of her way to show off her relationship. What truly surprised the group’s leader was the fact that the eldest member had an arm securely wrapped around you, her other hand too busy holding an umbrella in an attempt to shield you both from the rain.

An umbrella?

Before Jihyo could think about it any further, Nayeon made her way into the dorm.

The first thing the oldest Twice member did as soon as she got home was throw the umbrella somewhere far away from her, a sour expression on her face. Jihyo let out a loud laugh, not believing the sight before her very eyes; the leader’s laugh finally catching the other girl’s attention.

“You’re such a simp, Im Nayeon”.

_____________________

Loud laughs bounced back and forth across the Twice dorm and Nayeon wished she could disappear. What would you even say to that?

 “I’m sorry, I don’t understand. Why did that make you realize she loves me?” the members gave themselves whiplash with how fast they all turned to look at you.

“You mean she never told you?” Dahyun asked.

“Told me what?” you asked nervously, Nayeon whined, wrapping you in an even tighter hug.

“Nayeon absolutely hates umbrellas, y/n” Jihyo explained. “She hates them so much, back when we were trainees, she used to wear a box on top of her head whenever it rained”.

“Even to this day!” Sana continued, “whenever our managers try to help her out with umbrellas she runs away” she giggled.

“But somehow all of that goes out the window when it comes to you” Jeongyeon smirked, “you have her wrapped around your finger, y/n”.

“Nayeon can’t have her princess getting sick” Momo teased.

The girls kept throwing jabs here and there, but you tuned them out, trying to focus your entire attention on your blushing girlfriend. You sent her a soft smile, she returned it immediately, feeling absolutely at ease once she saw that sparkle in your eyes.

“Do you really hate umbrellas that much?” you laughed.

Nayeon groaned at your question, feeling embarrassed all over again. “I do, I really really do”, she paused to steal a quick kiss from your lips, “but I love you way more”.

You beamed at your girlfriend, feeling on cloud nine when you finally heard her say those words you had been longing for.

“I love you too, Im Nayeon” you said, pressing your lips against hers in a sweet kiss.

“Jihyo! The couple is being annoying again!”.

_____________________

A/N: Everytime I think of a one shot I always have the idea that it will be roughly 500 words, and somehow I always end up going past 1k, oh well.

Thank you so much for reading! If you have any requests or anything like that feel free to let me know :)

[heartsforhamzah]

hamzah al-emad x barista reader ˗ˏˋ☕ˎˊ˗

coffee kisses.

— hamzah started coming into the cafe you work at because his usual was closed for renovations. he wasn’t one to love change, but this also meant he wasn’t willing to give up coffee..

— the shop was small, and local. not many people came to this one as it was in a pretty secluded part of town, and most didn’t even know it had been built a few years back. the only customers you had were men who came in everyday hoping today would be the day you’d say yes to going out on a date with them, busy mom’s, or people like hamzah who’d just put “coffee shop near me” into their gps. the coffee was amazing, the pastries were to die for, and you could say that your customer service was great. 

— his order was simple, easy to remember, and he was major sweetheart who always tipped you much more than you thought you deserved. every time you saw his car pull up, the order was made to perfection and some sort of doodle was draw onto the paper cup.

— given he was extremely attractive, and his manners made his so much more enchanting, you were feeling bold. the shop was empty, your coworker was on break, and it was only you and the curly haired boy in the cafe. hamzah stood looking at his phone, waiting for his order as the machine was having some difficulties. you called his name, and handed him the cup which you had written “for my favorite customer”. hamzah thanked you, not even bothering to look at the cup until he had entered his car. the second he’d read that his mind was all over the place. had this cup been for him? who else would it be for? did you like him as much as he liked you?

— the next time he visited the shop, he’d finally worked up the courage to ask for your number. 

“could i have your number. im sorry if that’s weird.. it’s fine if not, i don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” he asked, shyly fumbling over his words.

“i’ve been waiting for you to ask,” you giggle. you handed him his cup with your number written on the side.

— the two of you would facetime, and hangout, first as “friends” but you both knew you’d never be “friends”. the mutual attraction that neither of you would admit was the elephant in the room, both of you too afraid it would scare the other off. 

— the second you got together, dating rumors were all over. not that you minded. you adored being able to call the brunette yours. your dumb videos posted about being a barista were suddenly viral and business at the shop was doing so well that you’d been given a raise. 

he would posting pictures of you in you’re uniform with the caption “barista of the year!!” 

— the kisses shared between you two tasted coffee-like and maybe that’s why you were so addicted to him. you were hooked onto his touch, you craved the feeling of his lips on yours. you both loved your “coffee kisses”.

tag list: @miaquesadilla @reeseisinapiece divs are by @/anitalenia , feedback encouraged